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blueywrites · 1 day

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someday I'll get it

eddie munson x fem!reader eddie comforts you when the lingering memory of your ex brings shame with soaked sheets.

3.1k

cw: 18+. toxic ex, feelings of self-doubt, referenced verbal abuse, hurt/comfort, smut, squirting, first time piv with new partner, no y/n, no physical descriptions.

this is for my fellow infps & all the girlies who fall fast and hard. a bit of a departure from the other naughty nights entries - not as filthy, quite a bit more emotional. I really liked writing it! check out the original ask here.

enjoy xx

Two months after you and David broke up, you downloaded Hinge. Your best friend helped you make your profile, and after some careful crafting over brunch mimosas to soften the flaws you saw in your photos and loosen your lips to make you clever in your bio, you were happy with the facsimile of yourself you’d presented to the dating public. The nerves only crept in during the Uber ride back to your apartment. What if no one liked you? What if what David said— that you’d never find someone that cared about you like he did— turned out to be right? You knew, deep down, that David’s idea of ‘care’ was not what you wanted. But as the weeks went by, your hope began to dwindle; your heart shriveled a little more each time a potential connection faltered and died. And though you kept reminding yourself how bad things were with him, how small he made you feel and how little he truly gave you, you couldn’t help the fragment inside you that hissed in a raspy twang:

Maybe I’m all you’re good enough for. Maybe my love is all you really deserve, and without me, you’ll just end up alone.

And then you found Eddie.

His was the first conversation that lasted longer than a handful of back-and-forth messages, aside from that one rushed first ‘date’ that turned out just to be an attempt to get some dick’s dick wet. Eddie was chatty, maybe a bit excessively so, but you’d take that over the dry single-sentence replies most guys seemed capable of. It was refreshing not to be the one sending double- and triple-texts for once. And he didn’t do it in an anxious way, either, or one that made you feel you weren’t answering quickly enough. It seemed more that he just wanted to talk to you about whatever popped into his head, and that— along with his pretty brown eyes and smile, his lobe piercings and hand tattoos, and that one blurred photo of him playing guitar on some cramped bar stage, looking all sweaty and alive— piqued your interest in a major way.

Eventually, he took you on a first date, which was followed quickly by a second. And after a full month or so of officially seeing one another, now, following an afternoon spent together, you’re in your bed with him— laid out along your sheets, his weight having dipped the mattress beside you enough times that it’s just starting to feel familiar.

Looking up at Eddie above you, you’re hit again by how sexy he is, sexier than his Hinge profile would’ve suggested, even though that initial photo made your finger pause in the first place. In it, his hair was tied up at the nape of his neck; it’s loose now, hanging around his pale face in loose tangles ‘cause you’d run your fingers through it while he kissed you. His brow was furrowed in concentration, and it is again, except now there’s the pink flush of arousal across his cheeks and a sheen of sweat gleaming off the bulb of his soft nose, visible in the dim light from your lamp. That first time you saw him, Eddie's fingers were wrapped around a tattoo gun, frozen mid-stroke as he carefully etched ink into skin. Now, they’re quite in motion— just as deft and strong, but instead of using them to crawl the needle across the expanse of someone’s back, he’s plunging them into your swollen pussy, winding you up tighter and tighter ‘til you’re writhing on your own sheets.

He’s been at it for a little while now, coaxing your pleasure out with those thrusting fingers and the rough pad of his thumb swiping over your clit. You moan, letting your eyes slip closed as your orgasm starts to rush up, ready to let that wave wash over you before you happily return the favor. But when Eddie presses the heel of his palm firmly into your lower stomach, flicking his thumb faster against your clit as he fingers you, your mounting pleasure twists, thrumming into something more intense.

Oh, fuck.

The feeling is ecstasy but beneath it, there’s also panic. Because you know— and dread— what comes next.

You gasp, choking on the words of warning stuck in your throat, your hand snapping to grip his wrist. You mean to pull it off but you don’t, just clutch him tight in a way he must take as encouragement because he starts to talk you through it. “That’s it, sweetheart, soak my fuckin’ hand—”

It’s inevitable now, so you stop trying to fight it. Like a flipped switch, you release the resistance, leaning into the feeling, which triples in size the moment you do. You seize up, crying out as you cum around Eddie’s fingers— eyelids fluttering, mouth hanging open, the gush of fluid against your inner thighs a secondary sensation to the gut-wrenching orgasm wracking your body. When it subsides, your body feels wrung out in the best way, sunken into the mattress, languid and boneless and like you’re so light you might float away if Eddie wasn’t pressing kisses into your neck like praise.

The peace has to break though. It always does. The second you shift and feel the sodden sheets below you, that familiar shame triggers, quick on the heels of a cruel twang bouncing around your skull.

You draw your legs up, inadvertently kneeing Eddie in the belly. When he pulls back to look at you, you’re curling into yourself, staring up at him so mournfully his heart must twist ‘cause you can see it written on his face.

He searches your face for a moment. Then Eddie’s eyes widen and his face blanches; you see the concern give way to horror. His adam’s apple bobs on a thick swallow. “A-Are you okay?” Eddie croaks, hovering awkwardly now, seemingly stuck between wanting to reach for you and give you space. “Did I hurt you? Did you not want—?”

He looks sick, but you’re quick to shake your head, feeling even sadder now that you’d made him worry. “No, m’sorry,” you say in a small voice. “I’m so sorry, I’m— I didn’t mean to.” You take a breath that hitches in your chest. “I-I made a mess…”

Instantly, Eddie looks relieved. He even huffs a little disbelieving chuckle. "So? You think I care about a little mess?" he asks, squinting as he tips his head at you, aiming for levity. But his attempt to make light of things can't break through to you— not after all the times you've been here before, cowering in your own cooling puddle as David beat you down with his caustic words, leaving you with bruises on the inside of your ribs.

When your expression crumples further, any amusement slides off Eddie's face, leaving him utterly somber. Quietly, he says your name. "Are you alright?"

Your mouth works soundlessly for a moment before you find your voice. It feels jagged, like it’s been broken apart and splintered back together. “My ex… he used to get really mad when that happened. Said it was gross, that it was my fault now he’d have to wash the sheets.” An ache rises up your throat, and you avert your eyes. “He’d make me do it and change the bed before I could go to sleep.”

A severe wrinkle forms between Eddie’s brows— confusion, indignation, maybe both. “Wait, but— couldn’t he feel it coming? It feels different inside when a girl’s gonna squirt. Why would he keep doing it if he didn’t want you to?” He’s plain, as direct as he always is, and in the face of such a bald question, you have nothing to reply with but the barest shrug of shoulders weighed heavy under a burden you haven’t yet been able to shed.

When some seconds pass in silence, Eddie realizes you aren’t going to elaborate. He softens. “I’m sorry,” he says quietly. “For what it’s worth, sex is supposed to be messy. And I really wanted to make you feel good. I’m glad I did.”

You can’t see them, but you can feel his fingertips brush against your ankle. When you nudge into the touch, he places a tentative hand on your foot, letting his thumb press into the center just below your toes. He raises his eyebrows, looking something like a puppy dog. “D’you wanna take a break? Can I get you some water?”

You shake your head, then open your hands to him— not quite able to extend your arms out for a hug, feeling too brittle and pathetic to make your wanting so obvious. You find with relief that Eddie is perceptive enough to know what the gesture means. Carefully, he leans over you and plants his palms beside your upper arms, sliding them under to fold you in. When he goes to lower himself in a slant on top of you, you let your knees fall open in a silent invitation instead. You’re very happy you did when, after some mutual shifting and shimmying to make yourselves comfortable, Eddie’s weight slots against you— your collarbone to his chest, his lap held in the cradle of your thighs, your arms wound underneath his to clutch his bare back as he presses you into a comforting embrace.

You focus on the feeling of Eddie on top of you— his belly expanding and contracting against your navel, his heat seeping into you head-to-toe, his herb-musk scent clinging to his shoulder when you tuck your face there, slowly letting him ease you. For a while, you breathe into him like that, letting yourself sink into the intimacy of all his bare skin against yours until the physical sensations swallow up that hissing voice, and it finally falls silent. With a heavy sigh of relief, the last of the lingering tension from the memory of David leaves you.

Finding you now relaxed, Eddie hums against your hair, a rumble that sounds like satisfaction with himself that he was able to bring you comfort. He untucks one of his hands from beneath you then, shifts his arm along your sheets so his forearm frames your head. You pull your face from his hot skin, letting your head thump back against the mattress as the final surrender to your recovery.

Eddie’s thumb strokes along your hairline as he looks down at you, his hips cradled by yours, his flagging but still present erection pressed intimately against the crease of your thigh behind his boxers. Quickly, you realize how much easier it was to be embraced like this when he wasn’t looking at you. Under his gaze, you feel exposed, almost too much to bear-- too vulnerable, your soft underbelly revealed for him to sink his teeth into. But he doesn't. Maybe, you think, Eddie never would. Where David had fangs, Eddie's teeth are blunted; capable of damage if he were to try hard enough, but more suited to playful nips, which is all he ever seems to care for anyways, at least for how little long you've known him. He's still new, and you're still learning how it feels for him to see you and decide what he'll do with what he finds.

It's thrilling and downright scary to let him, but you let him. You blink up at Eddie, deliberately resisting the urge to master your expression and hide from him. Your heart thuds and squirms as he observes you for a long moment, still stroking your forehead with his thumb like you're a skittish rabbit, kept only from fleeing by a gentle, hypnotizing touch.

After a long moment, Eddie's features ease. One corner of his lips tugs up into a crooked, dimpled smile. "Pretty girl," he murmurs, and something releases inside you. Your hands skate down the hot plain of his back, skimming slowly over its topography-- the elegant jut of his shoulder blades, the solid strength of his lats, the low, curved dip just before the hill of his covered cheeks. Those you spread your fingers over, gently pulling him in closer to you, and you flutter at the shaky breath he exhales over your lips as his shaft presses tighter between your bodies.

"You want to?" he whispers, his eyes flitting between yours. You know what he’s asking. In the month you’ve been together, you’ve done pretty much everything but gone all the way with him. You weren’t waiting for anything in particular, more just a sense that it would feel right to connect with him that way.

You feel that now.

So you respond with a kiss— firm, decisive, one that Eddie opens his mouth instantly to. His tongue finds yours eagerly, slick muscle against slick muscle, and the wet sounds of you meeting and parting have your arousal stirring up into a flurry of excitement and desire. Your fingertips ease beneath the waistband of his boxers, pushing the fabric down to bare him, and you crane your neck to keep kissing him until eventually you can’t reach any lower. Eddie helps you shimmy them off then, his lips falling still as he concentrates on wiggling his hips and kicking his legs to get them down to his ankles. You feel him kick one final time, followed by the faint shlump of fabric hitting the ground before he’s suddenly propped on his elbows and his hands are cupping your cheeks, tilting your face to kiss you so thoroughly it steals your breath away.

And you think— expect, maybe— that now that you’re about to have sex, the energy between you and Eddie will keep escalating until you’re caught up in a rush: both panting, desperate, fervent in your need for completion. But it doesn’t happen like that. Instead, your kisses slow, turning into lingering, open-mouthed presses, a sensual ebb and flow of lips and tongue and teeth— deep, savoring, as if the pleasure of what you’ll both feel when he joins with you is so certain, there’s no need to hurry it along. You raise your knee to open yourself up, and with a nudge of Eddie’s narrow hips, his shaft nestles into the slick wetness between your puffy lips. You press up to meet him, grinding slowly in time with your kisses until your abundant arousal coats him thoroughly, easing the way for you to reach down and guide his tip to catch at your entrance. And when you lift your legs, joining your ankles at the back of his thighs, you feel Eddie enter you for the first time.

There’s no resistance. It’s just a slip, a glide, and an exquisite stretch as he sinks inside, splitting you with his thickness. Eddie moans low as his cockhead meets the deepest part of you. It’s a gravelly sound, one that rumbles against your breasts when you twine your limbs tighter around him, already covetous of the feeling of him touching every bit of you he possibly can. Your pussy flexes and flutters, testing the welcome intrusion, preening when she elicits an answering twitch from his length before he draws just slightly back and rocks in again. You sigh softly, smiling as your eyes slip closed when you feel Eddie’s curved lips press to your temple.

The rhythm you find together is natural, if rather shallow— shallow because your hands are clutching at his back and his arms are wrapped tight around you, keeping you close as can be. He can’t pull even halfway out; his hips rock in the barest gap that remains as if neither of you can stand even that much distance. There’s no lack of enthusiasm, though, no lack of passion as he pushes in so tight that the pressure has your swollen clit jolting with a delicious spark on every thrust. The heat between you grows, turning you sticky and damp with sweat down the length of your bodies. The pleasure grows too, quickly for you with all the stimulation until you’re panting against his shoulder. It grows unimpeded until Eddie nestles his face down further toward you, inadvertently feeding you a mouthful of his hair.

You turn your cheek and try to spit it out, but the thick, dry strands stick stubbornly to your lips until you have to enlist his help. "Your hair's everywhere, Eddie,” you murmur, more amused than anything.

"Ah, shit.” You have to hide a smile against his jaw at how put out he sounds. “Sorry." He tries to shake it away from you, craning his neck back but unwilling to stop embracing you.

"S' okay." Gently, you extract your arms from under his, huffing a little chuckle at the tiny whine of protest that rumbles in his throat. He props himself up so you can carefully clear his face: nudging his bangs out of his eyes, then pushing back the bulk of his curls, tucking them tenderly behind his ears.

"There," you say, sweet and warm, your smile growing at the way the hair almost springs right out again. Unable to be contained, a lot like Eddie.

A lot like the way you feel about him.

"I love your hair," you tell him suddenly, your heart twisting at the way he lights up in response. Eddie rubs the very tip of his nose against yours, smiling boyish and wide, and emotion wells up inside you-- potent and poignant like the sting of happy tears, sweet like coming home and tender like a bruise all at once.

And it’s like the second you say it, you can’t stop thinking about what words really want to spring from your lips. But it's too soon, far too soon, so you cup his face, draw your thumb along his cheek, and kiss him instead, keeping yourself occupied so those words will stay inside.

You kiss him until he’s moving steadily within you again; kiss him until you’re squirming beneath him, whining into his mouth. Kiss him as he drives you over the edge of bliss and then follows you, groaning when he throbs and spills inside. You kiss Eddie until the pleasure fades into contentment, until you both are sated, until those kisses gradually slow and gentle and turn to chaste presses of swollen, love-bitten lips.

Your mouths finally part. And when you see the way Eddie’s looking at you— the curl at the corner of his lips, the subtle tilt of his brow, the warmth in his deep brown eyes— you remember what David told you before you made him leave.

You’ll never find someone who cares about you the way I do.

You knew he was wrong then. But now, you know it.

#blueywrites #eddie munson fanfic #eddie munson x reader #eddie munson x you #eddie munson x y/n #eddie munson smut #eddie munson fic #eddie munson x female reader #eddie munson imagine #eddie munson one shot #eddie munson angst

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86espresso · 3 days

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can I get the "too much communication" with jack?

I think that's what your last post was for 😭

shut up (with affection!) | jh86

sum: in which jack likes to hear himself talk

prompt: too much communication (💀)

warnings: smut, angst, fluff ☺️ use of y/n :/ ,use of she/her pronouns for reader, short

a/n: help yes, im sorry i wasn’t clear with what i wanted but if you haven’t noticed im pretty small on hockeyblr 😔 so i didn’t think anyone would actually ask but omg so happy you did ❤️ also not sure why im seeing this decades later.

—

LIGHT shone through the curtains in Y/N’s bedroom, though that wasn’t what woke her up.

An arm was slung across her waist, legs were tangled with hers, a face was buried in the crevice of her neck, and soft lips were moving up and down her shoulder. She felt something go off in her stomach. She could get used to this.

“Awake, angel?” Jack’s rough morning voice reached Y/N’s ears and could’ve just melted right then. He had been with her for close to ten months now; meaning they had practically moved in with eachother, she was at every home game, he was at every soccer match, she had a drawer at his, he had a toothbrush at hers. They were slowly intertwining in each other’s lives and neither of them wanted to stop anytime soon.

And then he started.

The endless rambling that half annoyed, half endeared Y/N.

“Wait no- I mean that I should use a different word instead of pretty because you’re so many things and you like when i use long words, don’t you ? I should-”

“Jack, my love, slow down,” Y/N says, facing him and cupping his cheek. His hair is tousled, eyes droopy, bottom lip jutted out, and brows furrowed. He’s shirtless and the sunlight bathes him in a soft golden light. Her heart skips a beat as she assures him that complimenting her in any way would melt her even if it was the same thing, every day, for the rest of their lives.

—

The room was dark and hot and the bed rocked with Jack’s movements. He had one hand loose around Y/N’s throat and the other supporting her leg that was thrown over his shoulder.

It was all going fine until

“Y’know what Trev told me the other day.”

Y/N’s eyes snapped open. What the fuck???

His hair was falling in his eyes and a thin sheet of sweat covered his body. He looked so good and was doing so well.

“Jack? What-” she stopped short when he thrusted particularly roughly making her jaw drop and her eyes roll to the back of her head. Jack wasn’t phased though.

“He- told me how-oh fuck I’m so close, baby-” Y/N quickly shut him up by yanking his mouth down to hers. She really didn’t want to hear how fucking Zegras did whatever in her current position.

—

Y/N stood off to the side as Jack abruptly wraps up the post game interview after giving curt responses. She raised her eyebrows; normally it could get hard to not make him overshare.

Jack had already showered and changed into a delicious suit that was for sure coming off as soon as they got home.

“Hi, angel.” Y/N got on her tip toes to press a soft kiss against Jack’s lips. He wrapped his arms around her and sighed, pulling back and resting his forehead against hers. “Hey.”

It was short and quiet and so unlike Jack (even after a loss) and she hated it.

“Baby, what’s wrong?” Y/N reached forward to cup his cheek and lightly caresses it with her thumb. He leans against her hand and his eyes droop.

“Nothin’, sweets. Just tired.” Y/N knew there had to be more, she could tell by the way his fingers were fiddling with eachother and the almost unnoticeable clinch of his eyebrows.

“C’mon, baby, talk to me,” Y/N softly murmurs, Jack’s new behavior doesn’t feel natural at all. He was so full of energy all the time (definitely because of the three hour naps) that she didn’t even have to match it if she was tired; he had enough for both of them.

“D’you-,” he pauses and steps back, removing his arms from her and running a quick hand through his hair. “Do you think I talk too much? Or I over share? Does it bother you?” His brows furrow deeper and Y/N’s heart stutters. She understood why he got so closed off all of a sudden. Her tough, strong boyfriend had such a sweet heart she could cry.

“Oh hon, well yes you do but it’s never bothered me. I actually really love it. You’re able to talk so much all the time and there’s nothing I love more than the sound of your voice.” Y/N watches as Jack’s expression softens. She steps closer and weaves her arms around him from the inside of his suit jacket.

“I love that you’re so expressive. I love how you just say anything no matter, I love how-” Y/N pauses. The three words dancing on the tip of her tongue, waiting and anticipating. She takes a deep breath and sneaks a glance at Jack, who had the hint of a smile that reached his eyes.

“I love you.”

He goes limp in her arms.

“Y/N I-”

“One second. Let me finish.” Y/N steps back and fully looks into his eyes. “And I know you love me too. You know why, angel? Because you tell me every single day. Every sweet nothing, all the random babbling about how I’m so sweet to you at any given time, gave me enough courage to say it right now.”

Jack looked like he could cry; Y/N didn’t get the chance to see it though, because of the soul crushing hug he just pulled her into.

“I love you so much more.”

“I might get dry as fuck during sex though.”

“Yeah? Wanna take me up on that?”

#jack hughes #jack hughes x reader #ellie writes 🙂‍↔️

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mrsbuckybarnes1917 · 2 days

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8: SURPRISE!

Previous chapter < MASTERLIST > Next chapter

Bucky's surprise birthday party provides more surprises than you had hoped.

Word count 3.2k

Warnings: Birthday boy behaving badly, Priya is the warning here!

Erik’s sexual intervention had released you of the tension you felt whenever you were around Bucky and you realized that his birthday was quickly approaching. You made it your mission to start working on Bucky’s birthday party. The previous year he had flat out refused to let you throw him any festive gathering and you had only accepted that on one condition: he would get one this year. You had no intention of letting him wheedle his way out of it this year. He had begrudgingly agreed but only if it was something small and intimate with his friends only.

You had given Bucky a withering look. "Trust me! I know you well enough. You’re going to like it. I promise!"

You felt like a kid in a candy store, who had been given the keys to Willy Wonka’s entire kingdom. Glee was written across your features, you wanted everything to be perfect for your best friend. Steve was your trusty accomplice and you had invited Priya into the fold as a way to make up for your misdemeanors. She had suggested that you order food from Sticks and Stones because he loved the food there and even convinced Victor to help with the catering.

A week before the auspicious day, you had pulled Steve aside to ask him if he would accompany you to pick up Bucky’s birthday gift.

"Did you find it?" Steve asked you.

"The Glenn Miller vinyl?"

Steve nodded.

"Yeah, I found it! It’s in a vintage records store in SoHo." You smiled.

"Bucky’s going to love it. His family would play them all the time, he was such a natural dancer. It would be nice for him to do that again."

"I’m glad it’s got Captain America’s seal of approval!" you quipped cheekily.

Steve rolled his eyes, feeling relaxed and happy for once. "Do you want to go and pick it up now? I’ll drive. I can pick up my gift at the same time!"

"Oh that would be great, Steve! What did you get him?"

"You know that picture you took, the one of Bucky, you, me, Nat and Sam?"

"Yeah, I know the one."

"I painted it. There is a guy who said he would frame it and he texted me this morning saying it was ready to collect.

"Steve! I can’t wait to see it!" you squealed with excitement. "Let’s go!"

Both of you set off, climbing the stairs that led to the parking garage.

"Oh, Priya, hey! Didn't see you there!" you smiled at her as you noticed her presence at the top of the staircase.

Priya smiled back at you tersely.

"Everything okay?" Steve asked.

"Fine."

"Do you need a lift home?"

"No, I'm spending the night with Bucky."

"Ahh," Steve blushed at the implication of sex.

You rolled your eyes and tugged on Steve's sleeve. "Come on, punk. See you later Priya!"

March tenth came around quicker than expected. You waited impatiently for Bucky to arrive as his 'surprise’ party. Even though Priya was distracting him, Bucky knew about the events that had been planned. You knew he didn't like loud noises or jump scares, but he had promised to act suitably surprised.

Everything for the party went off without a hitch. The room was filled with dozens and dozens of black and gold balloons. Swing music was playing on the gramophone that Tony had purchased for the occasion. Sam cheekily had a cardboard cut out of Bucky made with his vibranium arm cut off so you could play ‘Pin the arm on Bucky’. You groaned but secretly you wanted to beat everyone.

Thor had made an appearance and was already half way through the bucketful of Asgardian ale, which he claimed to have brought for the birthday boy. Even Ayo, who you'd invited, had graced you with her presence. When she arrived, you flung your arms around the reserved Wakandan warrior. The Dora Milaje did not engage in public displays of emotion, but for you she offered a hug in return.

Things seemed to be going well. Bucky arrived with Priya and was greeted with yells and streamers. Bucky's surprise was convincing… possibly a little too dramatic, making Priya laugh and you groan exasperatedly. You stood on the side of the room watching everyone mingle, enjoying how Bucky's attention was demanded from everyone in the room. His friends were kind enough not to crowd him, or overwhelm him, but also make him feel special all at the same time.

It warmed your heart to see the light in his eyes, the enjoyment on his face. Priya was glued to his side, stroking his hair, whispering in his ear. His arm was constantly around her waist. She was the only thing that marred your perfect vision of the event.

"I am surprised that James chose that woman," Ayo appeared beside you, seemingly out of nowhere.

"Jesus, Ayo. We've talked about you sneaking around. Don't make me tie a bell around your ankles!"

Ayo smiled. "Why isn't that you?"

"What do you mean?"

"Why haven't you told James how you feel?" Ayo doesn't wait for your reply. "It could be you dancing with him rather than standing here looking like a wallflower."

"Maybe you could dance with me."

"I think not, Y/N." Ayo never used your nickname.

"Way to let a girl down gently, Ayo."

Ayo just rolled her eyes at you and ventured over to Thor who was challenging everyone to a drinking contest, one which no one was engaging in. Steve was beside him, sipping the liquor carefully enjoying the buzz he rarely got to experience. Wanda and Vision were lovingly embraced in each other's arms in a corner, dancing like the rest of the world didn't exist. Nat was behind the bar serving her own special cocktails and flirting with a blushing Bruce. Clint and Laura were laughing with Pepper, while Tony, Sam and Rhodey were playing cards and making the most outrageous noise.

You loved your little found family, even though you missed the one that brought you up. Coulson's S.H.I.E.L.D. team had inducted you into the world of violence and espionage and aliens and time travel. It was with them that you'd learnt to control your powers and become worthy to call yourself an Avenger.

Agent Melinda May was the only member of the team you saw regularly anymore since she worked close by in the new S.H.I.E.L.D. Academy HQ. She had been your S.O. for many years and held a special place in your heart, despite her prickly exterior. She often joked that you would make an excellent addition to her staff at the Academy and to ensure that you lived long enough to accept the position when retiring from ‘that Avenger gig’.

You were brought out of your reverie about the past by Priya, who was standing on a chair shouting about it being time for presents.

Everyone cheered and you were grinning like a lunatic now. You felt excited to give Bucky your gift. The first edition Glenn Miller record was safely wrapped in a solid casing. In the Mood was the last song that Bucky and his family had danced to while he had been on leave from the War. His last happy memory of them before he had fallen from the life he had known, before he had been thrust into a world of ice and torture.

About a year ago, you had caught Bucky using your Spotify to listen to music from his childhood and had offhandedly mentioned this piece of information about his past. You kept hold of this precious tidbit for the right occasion.

Bucky had already started ripping open wrapping paper when you ventured over. Wanda had knitted him a black scarf with golden threads to match his arm, which had made him smile. Next Sam handed him a small black box which Bucky opened to find a pair of fluffy pink handcuffs.

"Thought you could use some props, spice life up a little," he winked at Bucky. Sam had a way of pushing Bucky's buttons, but you could see the mild blush on Bucky's cheeks which deepened when Priya interjected.

"Thank you very much, Samuel, but James and I don't need such tawdry things in the bedroom."

Bucky shrugged apologetically at Sam and you wondered if he was thinking about your recent conversation.

Sam was pushed aside by Thor, who deposited a large vat of ale into Bucky's arms. "Many happy returns, metal man." He patted Bucky on the back so hard that Bucky almost dropped his gift.

Bucky was depositing the alcohol on the gift table when he was approached by Ayo. "Happy Birthday, James."

"Thank you for coming, it means a lot that you took the time."

"You look like you are doing well for yourself."

"Yeah, it’s good," Bucky smiled.

"This is for you." She handed him a simple box with padding on the inside. Bucky opened it to find a pair of ornately decorated blades made from vibranium. Everyone gasped at how beautiful they looked in the dim lights. They collapsed in on themselves and were discrete and easy to conceal. Ayo pointed out a small device which acted like a homing beacon so Bucky would be able to locate them if he lost sight of them.

"These are incredible! Thank you."

Tony didn't have many words but he did hand Bucky a beautifully ornate envelope which Bucky opened tentatively. Inside was an invitation to a magnificent moonlit dinner on a yacht on the Hudson. Bucky held the gift reverently in his hands, his vibranium fingers barely gripping, as though their strength might make the gift crumble. His eyes glistened in the party lights, a thin film of unshed tears. There had been a time where they were ready to kill each other, and even now they never spent any time alone together. You knew that this gift meant a lot to Bucky.

"Dinner on a boat? I think we'll have to pass on that, I get sea sick." Priya commented, gazing at the gift certificate around Bucky's arm.

A flicker of irritation crossed Tony's face, before he grinned mischievously. "Not a problem, it's not person specific. Manchurian Candidate here can take anyone he likes. Capsicle might not be a fan of the food, but I think Cricket would really enjoy the cuisine."

He turned to wink at you, making you blush. You couldn’t help but notice the scowl on Priya’s face, no matter how short lived it was and you knew you were about to meet your comeuppance when the glowering look she was shooting in your direction turned into a beaming smile.

"Jamie! It’s my turn, baby. I have a very special gift for you!" She hands him a thin square shaped gift wrapped in shiny golden wrapping paper. "Here!"

You felt a sudden weight on your chest, a feeling of dread washing over you. It felt like things were moving in slow motion, watching Bucky unwrap the gift. You didn’t know what you had been expecting when he pulled out a shiny record cover. It was as though someone had poured a bucket of ice water over you, except you were paralyzed. The color drained from your face as you realized what the album was.

‘The Very Best of Glenn Miller.’

Bucky’s eyes shone brightly as he dropped the wrapping paper and ran his flesh fingers over the cover reverently. "Priya," he gasped in a whisper. "I- it's perfect." Bucky wrapped his arm around her waist, pulling her into his chest and giving her a long, passionate kiss. "I love it! I love you!"

You barely noticed Steve sideling up to you, you couldn't hear him asking if you were okay. That was your gift. It was yours! If you didn’t have the vinyl you’d bought and so lovingly wrapped in your hand, you’d think she had stolen it from you. It felt like you couldn’t breathe, every attempt you made felt futile, like the air around you had left the room. He had shared the same things with her, you thought he trusted you with his past, but you weren't as special as you thought you were.

Eventually you looked up when Steve put a gentle hand on your shoulder. He whispered, almost as though his words he was about to use were criminal. "Do you remember when we were talking last week? Before we went to pick up our gifts? You don’t think she overheard us… do you? And…"

In the end, it didn’t really matter. You knew in the moment that you’d lost Bucky forever. Everything felt far away, the room was suffocating, why were there so many people? Tears burned in your orbital sockets, drowning you from the inside out. You couldn’t face them anymore, seeing the happiness on Bucky’s face, knowing that someone else was responsible for that smile, that light inside him, was heartbreaking. Ultimately, you wanted him to be happy but you wanted to share that joy with him, you wanted to be the one to give it to him and watching that mantle being taken from you and bequeathed to another person was soul crushing. Gripping your present tightly, you slipped out of the room, Steve watching your retreating footsteps with sympathy, but knowing not to follow.

A few tears escaped as you found refuge in the kitchen, but you had no desire to explain red eyes and a blotchy nose to any of the other team members or party goers, so you wiped them away angrily, taking a few calming breaths before pouring yourself a strong drink. You sank onto a bar stool, shoving the record onto the chair to your right, you had no use for it anymore. There had barely been time for you to take 2-3 sips from your drink before Bucky popped his head into the room.

"Cricket? There you are!"

"Hey Buck! Having a good time?" You plastered a smile on your face, one that didn’t quite reach your eyes.

Deception in this case was a futile attempt, Bucky was well versed in the movements of your face. "What’s wrong?"

"Nothing," you lied. "Just getting a drink."

"There are plenty of drinks back there."

He looked searchingly into your eyes and the facade you had erected was crumbling. You looked away, dropping your head to try and hide your face with your hair.

"It was just a bit much, everyone there… I don’t know, I feel a little… overwhelmed."

Too much drain of the social battery, Bucky was familiar with that. He pulled out the chair on your left, almost giving you a heart attack because you had momentarily forgotten which chair you’d left the present on.

"If you want to give me my gift here, we can do it privately. Everyone else is done," Bucky suggested, leaning towards you.

The smell of his cologne was intoxicating. Suddenly you felt angry that he was there, why couldn’t he give you a moment to grieve? Constantly invading your space, reminding you of what you couldn’t have, dangling the carrot but keeping it just out of reach. "Well you already have the perfect gift from your girlfriend, what more do you need?" You couldn’t keep the bitterness out of your tone.

As soon as the words left your mouth, you regretted them. But the damage was done. There was a deathly silence between you where you were afraid to look at your best friend.

"You know, I thought I would have you both in my life; my best friend and my girlfriend. I feel like you’re making me choose you over her and it’s not fair, Cricket! I’ve tried, I really have but you’re making it impossible! So you know what, I’m going to have to choose Priya. At least she bothered to put some effort into getting me a birthday gift. I can have a future with her."

The worst thing about his words were the disappointment and finality in his tone. And with that he left you alone with only your thoughts for company. A storm raged inside you, a maelstrom of emotions; anger, betrayal, abandonment, rejection, loss, just outright pain. How could he? How could he choose her over you? After everything you had been through together, the bond you had forged, the absolute faith and trust you had put in each other. Did it mean nothing to him? Did you mean nothing to him?

Trudging back to your room, you sought comfort in your giant bed, hoping it would envelope you completely. Wrapping the duvet around your body and over your head, you buried your face in a pillow and allowed the tears to fall. Once the gates had opened, the trickle of tears became a flood as you sobbed into your pillow to muffle the sound.

Why did he have to choose? Why didn’t he choose you? The pain in your chest was unbearable, a physical ache that matched the emotional turmoil inside you. You had tried so hard to make things work, to give him a balance of your friendship with his relationship with Priya, but now it seemed like all your efforts had been in vain. He had made his choice, and it wasn’t with you.

As you lay there in your bed, the tears continued to flow, a never-ending stream of sadness and heartbreak. You felt like a piece of you had been ripped away, leaving a raw, gaping wound in its place. How could you move on from this? How could you ever trust anyone again, knowing that they could just choose someone else over you?

You sighed, you knew now that you would never be good enough for him. Everything you’d tried to hold on to, had done nothing but push him away. You remembered when you had first understood your feelings, you’d considered pulling away to protect yourself. But Bucky had reeled you back in, constantly asking if he had done something to hurt you. So you’d given in, telling yourself you didn’t want to hurt him. But in reality, it had been selfish, you had indulged in a fantasy and ended up hurting the man you loved and getting hurt in the process.

You startled as a door slammed shut nearby. It was Bucky’s bedroom door, you could hear Priya giggling and Bucky’s deep voice through the wall. Your body froze with shock, the last thing you needed right now was to listen to your best friend having sex with his girlfriend. You shoved your airpods into your ears and turned up one of your lo-fi playlists and closed your eyes.

The decision you should have made then, was far more clear to you now. Your friend and old superior officer from your S.H.I.E.L.D. team had repeatedly offered you the chance to teach with her at the newly formed Coulson Academy. She had taught you everything you knew and believed in your ability to impart the knowledge you’d gained to potential agents. It was time for you to take her up on this offer.

As you wiped away your tears and made a decision to move forward, you knew that it was time to focus on yourself and your own happiness. Bucky had made his choice, and now it was time for you to make yours. You couldn’t continue to dwell on what would never be, on the pain of rejection and heartbreak.

Previous chapter < MASTERLIST > Next chapter

Tag list: @samodivaa @scoonsalicious @noonespecial90 @browneyedgrli @vicmc624 @cjand10 @capswife @julvrs @ordelixx @sashaisready @sebastians-love @belleofthebooks @missvelvetsstuff @angelbabyyy99 @rabbitrabbit12321 @love-isnt-greed @hhiggs @winters1917 @blackhawkfanatic @calwitch @learisa @daybleedsintonightfa11 @lillianacristina @mostlymarvelgirl @wintercrow @buckitostan @crist1216 @bisexualnikkisixx @robynjasp

#bucky barnes #bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes x you #bucky barnes x female reader #bucky barnes x f!reader #bucky barnes imagine #bucky barnes fan fiction #my best friend's girl

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jarofstyles · 2 days

Note

How would reaperry react to bunny wanting to go out and get drunk???

Ooo… very good question my friend. Let me write a little bit about it!

This is still when they’re in Vegas, I’m thinking

Warnings/ mentions of weapons, slightly murderous H, sexual undertones, alcohol, possessiverry, violence hehe

Check out our Patreon 😈

———-

“I just…” running a hand down his face, he looked down at the girl who was trying her best to get him to give in with her little pout. He doubted she knew just how powerful that move was on him. Thank god he had his stone face to keep him from showing just how close he was to giving in. “I don’t like the idea of you out n’around when the creep could be anywhere.”

“I know…. But you’ll protect me, won’t you? Mia said she’d bring Layla so we don’t even need to pick them up or anything. They’re going to Pink Panda.” Her hand smoothed down his shirt, letting out a sigh. The train of thought could be seen working through her face, trying to find a way to get him to give in. It was a little reassuring that she didn’t know just how much she affected him in most ways, because as soon as she figured it out he was going to be fucked.

That particular phrase did exactly what it needed to do, though. His jaw tightened and he flexed his fingers as his hand fell towards the gun holstered under his jacket. Bunny didn’t have a fucking clue the lengths he would go to to protect her. The obsession had been building, pulling him into the dark waves where she was the only source of sunlight to get him out of it. “Jesus, Bun.” He rolled his head back on his shoulders to look at the ceiling.

The truth of the matter was he was tired. Exhausted, even. His bones were weary and his muscles tight from stress, his hands aching from a particularly annoying job he had to do today. Thankfully she hadn’t clocked the split knuckles yet. It was hard to leave her with others, even if he did trust them to protect her. They knew he would fully kill them in cold blood if something were to happen to her, and no one wanted to trigger the Reaper namesake to crawl out of where he had been laying in wait.

“Please?” Her voice sweetened, fingers trailing down his stomach, baiting him in the best way she knew how. “C’mon, Daddy. I’ll make it worth your while.” The purr went straight to his cock, making him cuss under his breath. She could tell it was working and was very happy to continue pushing. “It’s been so long since I’ve been able to see my friends… you can keep me safe.” Nimble fingers ran over his belt, lazily tracing over the gun he had on him and back to front of his jeans.

“There will be ground rules. The moment they’re broken, I’m dragging you out of there.” He didn’t let her celebrate long, gripping her chin between his thumb and index finger to make her look at him. “Don’t make me kill someone tonight. I’ll do it, and I’ll probably enjoy it if it means one less son of a bitch is in there getting to look at you.”

Bunny shivered, eyes widening at how casual and serious he was about killing someone for her. It was toxic in a lot of ways, and yet it somehow still made her a little bit wet. The man was a mystery a lot of the time, but there was one thing he had made abundantly clear since they’d progressed into a more sexual relationship- he didn’t share.

“If you dance with me, maybe I’ll behave.” Blinking up at him, the smile grew on her face as his grip on hers tightened. “I’ll be such a good girl, you’ll see. I’ll be good for you, H. Just let me go out and drink, Daddy. Come n’protect me.” She knew she won when her palm settled over his cock, watching his eyes harden at her. Playing with Harry was like playing with fire, but Bunny knew she could withstand the burn.

“Better hope you do.” He grunted, releasing her face. “Go on, then. I’m going to get one of the other sons of bitches to come with us.” There was no way he could keep an eye on the outside and her at the same time.

“Okay, grouchy. I’m going!”

—-

Harry didn’t like clubs in Vegas, not now. He used to come in and find a fuck, a nice blowie in the bathroom or take them out to their cars to get a fuck in, but it didn’t hold the same appeal anymore.

His attention was split between two things. Making sure she was safe, and trying not to lose his shit and drag her to the bathroom by the hair to wreck her. Of course she’d been lying about behaving, giggly and flirty with him and going out to the dance floor with her friends while he stood by the sidelines and watched her dance.

The pink lights strobed, illuminating her and her skin as she had her arms up in the air. The alcohol had released some of her stress, which was partially why he agreed. Sure, he was stressed, but he wasn’t the one being stalked. She deserved to feel normal for once, and he could do it here. Harry couldn’t offer her a lot of things and he often weighed in on that, so this was a small blip in the compromises he could give to her.

“It’s clear.” Wiz bumped him. “Went back and looked at the cameras, wired it to be sent to my phone too. I’ll have footage of anything and anyone looking too close, so you can take the rod out of your back and go dance with her.” His chin nodded towards the girl lost in the music. “Looks like someone else is going to go for it if you aren’t.”

Which- no. No, he wasn’t going to let that happen. His clenched fist harshly slammed the watery drink down on the table and he made his way over, eyes hard and dark as he looked at the man getting a bit too close to Y/N. That simply wouldn’t fucking do. His steps were purposeful, no denying he was coming in to get her.

Y/N brightened at the view of him, but her face fell in confusion as he looked past her and pushed someone back and away from her. Someone she hadn’t even known was that close.

“You can fuck off. This one’s mine.” He barked, pulling her into his body. It felt more like an anchor, knowing she was safe in his arms, but of course- the man had to push it. Push him when he was already buzzing for a fight.

“C’mon man, can’t you share? Seems like you don’t have a problem letting her be seen-“ man, what a mistake.

To be fair, Harry was already on edge. But the idea of someone else thinking that his fucking girl was someone he’d ever share, even if he didn’t deserve her in the first place, made him see red.

As fast as he had pulled her in, he tucked her behind his back and swung his fist into the man’s stomach. It wasn’t the worst place, but he didn’t want to risk causing a huge scene when he was already on the lookout for a stalker. He was lucky that he couldn’t do what he truly wanted to do, that he had his girl behind him.

“Walk away while I let you.” He said lowly. “I took your breath but I can take a couple of teeth and your fucking memories of you don’t get the fuck away from my girl. You’re going to forget about her and fuck off, find someone else to stick your little dick into.”

“Alright, big guy.” Wiz appeared in front of them, knowing he needed to intervene and stepping between them. “It’s fine. He’s fucking off now because he knows that it’s for the best, right?” The guy was pale from the punch, still gasping for breath and holding his stomach, but he nodded nonetheless. “Good. Now, go.”

Harry wished he could do more. Wished this was his club so he could do worse, ever the irrational thinker when it came to Bunny, but it wasn’t. He had to stay out of jail so he could keep her safe, and that was the one thing he was counting on. If he didn’t get put away when he caught the one following her around, he surely would just from situations like this.

“I feel like I should be mad at you, but that was really sexy.” The girl of the hour giggled, a slight slur to her words as her hand tangled in his necklace. “Why do you do bad things and why does it make me horny, H?”

Like a switch, he placed his hands on her hips and narrowed his eyes at her. the anger easily translated over to arousal, fingers sliding down her sides and brushing over her ass before taking a bit of a grab. A little squeak left her, but she looked up at him expectantly. She was something fucking else. “Yeah? Y’liked it?” His tongue brushed over his bottom lip. “Do tell me what about it you liked-“

Wiz cleared his throat, making his stare break from hers with a scowl on his face. “Alright Romeo and Juliet. Have dry sex on the dance floor or whatever it is you do. I’ll keep watch for now.”

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xsleepinggoodx · 2 days

Note

I saw you did an ideal type of girl for Mikey. Can I have the same requests for Baji and Shinichiro, please? 🥺🫶

Dark-haired guys got me on a chokehold it is not funny anymore 🥲

YES TY SM FOR REQUESTING

That’s so real, literally any Tokyo revengers character solos every anime boy there is like I’m not even joking😭( the whole Sano family got me kicking my feet like even the grandfather. I saw a fanart on when was young and I was dang😍)

But here you go love!

—————————————————————————

SHNICHIRO SANO

- everyone and their mother knows that poor Shinichiro was rejected 20 times. But they say the one finds you when you stop looking for them, and that’s what happened to Shinichiro when he found you. He gave up at that point, firmly believing that no one would love him and he’d die single. That is until a certain, girly walked in his bike shop, asking for a decent, good bike that’s fast. His heart beat up at the sight of you, you just looked so alluring and attractive. He was in a love daze as you were talking, explaining what bike you wanted.

- I think Shinichiro needs someone who is sweet and kind, and able to understand easily. As we see in the manga, he loses his patience and can be harsh when he’s in anger. He needs someone who is compassionate and willing to take any heat from him.

- of course he will try his hardest not to lash out on you when he’s angry. He’d be so sweet to you and lash out on someone else. But even that’s no good to you, like Mikey, he needs a moral compass. Someone who will teach him right from wrong.

- it’s very hard to grow up without a father figure and having to take the lead of raising 2 kids along with another raging teen, Shinichiro is an overwhelmingly stressed and needs your tender love to soothe him, you alone soothes him. The very thought of you staying by his side is comforting him in ways you don’t even know.

- He has the big brother personality engraved in him so he’s very protective of you. Headcanons include him always having his hand on you lower back, or him holding your hand, walks behind you all the time, shielding his arm around your shoulder. When you’re sitting down on a bench, he has his arm around the bench behind you with his legs crossed talking to you so close. (When men do this I always get butterflies😛)

- As in looks, he doesn’t really care what you look like either, though I imagine him as someone who prefers a girl with long hair like Kuroo does😭 he thinks long hair girls look like princesses. If you had bangs too, he’d be all over you. Kissing you as much as you let him.

-he has been through so much, just make sure to stay by his side and you’ll be his number one. He’s planning to marry you when he has everything figured out <3

—————————————————————————

BAJI KEISUKE

- Baji was voted number 1 in best lover of Tr♥️ you already know 😍😍

- Baji is fierce, hot headed and outspoken. He appears to have a strong, intimidating demeanor but under all of that, he’s respectful and loving. He treats you so well and so nicely it keeps you up at night smiling.

- he needs someone who’s a almost the opposite of him. He was always smitten by the nice, soft girls when he grew up so he needs someone who is loving and loyal. Who stays by his side even when you don’t understand his reasonings. Someone who would do crazy stuff with him like burn abandoned cars. Someone who isn’t a kill joy with these things.

- he’d adore you if you found simple things like going to a gas station late at night more just riding his bike together with you at night exciting. His eyes would be glued to your face the whole night. Noting what excites you and what makes you happy so he could do it more often. He loves seeing you happy and enjoying every moment.

- Shares everything with you. He might’ve been an only child, but his mom taught him good things that make him a gentleman. He would share his food, earphone, anything you ask.

- he needs someone who is selfless. Someone who puts others feeling before theirs.

- for looks, he doesn’t care, as long as you’re healthy, he’s satisfied💕

—————————————————————————

Ty again so much for requesting <3

Please request more of these! I find them fun!

#tokyo revengers x reader #shinichiro sano x reader #shinichiro sano #baji keisuke #baji keisuke x reader

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chrollohearttags · 2 days

Text

Mic Check: Miami Heat | The Trailer

hello all and welcome to the reality show au (within an au) for reverb! This is a little bonus mini series that I’ve had in the works alongside the upcoming chapters of the story. These are some of the excerpts from dialogue of the show. I’m really excited for this one, even though it’s been ages since I’ve worked on it! I hope y’all enjoy! as always, reblogs and comments are HEAVILY APPRECIATED! it’s very hard to keep motivation for long winded series and fics when we don’t feel like anyone is paying attention.

side note: blue = narration

pink = dialogue from the ‘show’

══✿══╡°˖✧✿✧˖°╞══✿══ ══✿══╡°˖✧✿✧˖°

When you think of Miami…you think palm trees, South Beach..the glitz..fame..

“This house is literally perfect. It’s my dream home..” “it better be for $5 mil..”

“AMG is hosting the very first music festival of its kind. No other record label has done anything like this. Last year, the talent agency reportedly earned $7.2 billion—“

“You grew up sailing on a yacht. That’s some next level shit, dude!” “Yeah, it was definitely crazy.”

“You know you’ve made it when you can ride back through your old hood in a McLaren.” “And that bitch paid for too.”

“People asking for pictures and autographs when I go out is ‘sum I don’t think I can ever get used to. It’s all still new to me.”

“You’re the it girl now, get used to it.”

..and the glamor. The home to some of the biggest names in the music industry and they’re showing everyone what they’re all about..

“This is our year..believe that.”

“We’re doing our first international tour, dawg. This shit crazy.”

“This next album has to be my best..I owe that to everybody who’s supported me for the past ten years.”

“I’m gonna prove to them why I deserve to be here. This is just as much my passion as everybody else’s.”

“We’re more than just stripping or dancing, this is our art and we wanna show the world what Pole Assassins is all about.”

“You ever thought about making a solo album while Atelier Kiss is on hiatus?” “I don’t even know what that would sound like.”

“Dead Boys for Life. We doing this shit till we in the dirt.”

══✿══╡°˖✧✿✧˖°╞══✿══ ══✿══╡°˖✧✿✧˖°

..Welcome to the Magic City, like you’ve never seen it before! Watch your favorite stars as they navigate careers..

“AHHHH! IT’S SO PRETTY!..” “That's all you, baby. You earned it.”

“EJ the Don is the motherfucking blueprint. Everybody in this game has tried to imitate your style.” “There’s only one though.”

“Thank y’all so much for getting me to one million! I’m so happy right now—“

“This could be a huge opportunity for you..I think you should go for it. You could become the next big name in the modeling world if you play your cards right.”

“They want me to model for Playboy—“

“I’ve never done anything like this before..”

“I get one song to show them why I belong here. I can’t fuck this up.”

“You’re really nervous, aren’t you?” “Yeah..” “..don’t be, you earned this for a reason.”

“Can I throw up now? Because I feel like I want to..”

..love

“I just really love spending time with you. I always have so much fun when you’re around.”

“When are you gonna let me make you mine?” “When you stop playing games and ask me to.”

“That man really got you smiling like this! It’s so cute.” “Maybe I’m feeling him a lil’ bit.”

“I get to spend the rest of my life with you and that’s all that matters.”

“You wouldn’t know what to do with me..” “I can think of a couple things actually..”

“I swear, he’s everything I could ever want. I’ve never felt like this, I don’t know what to do.”

“Can I kiss you right now?” “You didn’t even have to ask.”

“After 20 years of marriage, how do you keep the spark in your relationship?” “I don’t think I can answer that on the radio.”

“I think you’re falling in love.” “What if I said I already am?..”

“All eyes are on us now. Everybody knows we’re dating.” “So let’s give them something to see, baby.”

..and..their biggest challenges! They’ll be tested beyond their limits and some..may even break.

“You abandoned me! I didn’t even know who you was..now you want to be a fucking mom?!”

“You were never a fucking dad to me. I barely even saw you and you wanna tell me what I’ve done wrong with my life?!”

“It’s been seven years since she passed away. I can’t even bring myself to go because it’ll all come back to me.”

“They tryna give me life behind this shit, dawg.” “That’s the thing about making it out. Everybody else gets left behind. The only way you can ever visit them is behind glass or at their grave.”

“I never forgave him for what happened and I don’t think I ever will. It’s some things you don’t talk about as a man.”

“Nah, I’m done playing these fucking games with you! Leave me alone.”

“My dad is sick and he wants me to take over his company. I don’t know if I can handle that responsibility.”

“It’s okay to be angry or cry, that’s what healing is all about. You’re not perfect.”

“Are you sure you wanna quit making music?” “I don’t know what I want anymore.”

“I’m just tired of feeling like I'm not being taken seriously. I’m just forever going to be the guy in second place.”

“Could we see another Mika ASH album in the future?…” “I don’t know if Mikasa Ackerman can survive that. It might kill me..”

“I’ve been fighting this addiction alone and I just can’t do it anymore.”

“I can’t afford no shit like this to happen right now. I don’t wanna go through with it..”

confronting their biggest fears..and each other.

“I always felt like you had a problem with me.”

“You just fake as hell and I can’t fake like I’m with all that.”

“You’ve always been a pussy. I don’t expect much.”

“I ain’t switch up on nobody. I grew up and that’s some shit you don’t know nothing about.”

“All you’ve ever gave a fuck about is music, nothing or no one else..” “Music is the only thing that’s never let me down. More than I can ever say for your sorry ass.”

“You let that bitch disrespect me in your face and said nothing to check her. I could never be with a man like you.”

“You gon’ tell her you’ve been fucking her man or do I have to?”

“Everybody keeps saying you’re bad for me.” “Maybe you should listen to them.”

“Bitch, I’m from that other side. I don’t do no back and forth!

“Either we all in this or Pole Assassins is done. I’m not bringing any deadweight with me to the top.”

“It just feels like I’m working so hard for nothing. Like this shit never gets easier.”

“You’ve always had a nasty spirit on you and I see why you have no friends.”

“Do you really even want to marry me? Or do you feel like you have to because you couldn’t have who you really wanted?”

“I can’t do this..oh my godddd!”

“I wonder why I’m still here sometimes. I just feel like I don’t want to see another year.”

“He’s lost his fucking mind, truly..”

“It’s them..or me. Make your choice.”

“Everybody in this room can kiss my ass. Fuck every last one of y’all and I mean that from my soul.”

Welcome to Miami!

“This is going to be crazy.”

New episodes every week!

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shrimpkini · 2 days

Note

Who's lex dark and why's that anon so pressed about you hating them? Hate to your heart's content!

CW: discussing CSA, pedophilia, and problematic content

Lex_Dark is a popular nsfw artist on twt. I want to get it out of the way that I at one point followed them for a brief time. This was until I saw some of the art they made. They’ve drawn porn of teen soukoku, endorse ships like Chuuya x Oda, Mori x Dazai, and Ranpo x Fukuzawa. They are a pro shipper who, surprise, surprise, takes things too far by glorifying and sexualizing pedophilia.

One of their pieces has Mori walking in on skk after they had sex. Like Dazai doesn’t have pants on and still has cum dripping down his legs and opens the door to greet Mori. They don’t depict teenagers having a sex life, because I do believe that can be done in a way that is needed for a story or self discovery. But that is not what they are doing. They are drawing a teen Chuuya and Dazai and making them “sexy” for the audience.

They have 60k followers and I’m really disappointed they have a platform. When it comes to sexualizing fictional children in art, it is incredibly harmful. It actively hurts real life children. I should know as a victim of csa myself. Normalizing the sexualization of teenagers is disgusting. I think we should ask ourselves what do they find attractive about the teenage version of those characters? Why are they so keen on shipping children with parental figures or adult characters who met them when they were kids? It is so important to mention that Oda met Dazai when he was 16. Oda is 5 years older than Dazai meaning he was 21. He watched him grow up and viewed him as a child in the light novel. BECAUSE HE WAS. Teenagers are CHILDREN. Same with Fukuzawa and Ranpo. He met Ranpo when he was a kid and essentially adopted him. To put it in real life perspective — could you imagine lusting after a child you adopted and raised? My little sister is around that age. Another example is as a 21 yo, even though it’s legal, I wouldn’t go after an 18 yo who is still in high school. We are at different points in our life and they are still very much a kid despite being “legal”. Morality and what makes a moral relationship doesn’t just lie in age.

That is why I say if you are making content like that you are either a pedo, making content for pedos, or apart of the problem. And that is why I hate the content Lex_Dark makes. Hopefully that made sense. If there’s any confusion or things that you want more clarification on - I’d be happy to oblige.

#shrimpkiniasks

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wildemaven · 14 hours

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first anniversary | dieter x poppy

A Sweet Creature

Ava Greene sits down with actor and friend, Dieter Bravo. Hollywood’s new leading man gets candid about life in front of and behind the camera. He talks about his latest movie, his commitment to his sobriety and his newest role— husband?!

Ava Greene: You're approaching three years sober now, how are you feeling?

Dieter Bravo: Probably the best I’ve felt in a long time. Sobriety is a day to day progression that I take very seriously, and I try to not lose sight of that even when I’m having bad days. Though, I’m grateful bad days have been few and far between at this point in my sobriety. I can attribute that to the support system I have built for myself through friends, family, my sponsor that I still work with and most importantly my wife who keeps me grounded daily. They all continue to keep me in check and remind me how awesome my life is, especially right now. Staying clean is a full time commitment, and it’s really a beautiful thing.

AG: You followed in your famous parents footsteps by going into acting and your career and struggles with sobriety have been well documented but your parents have rarely commented publicly, are they supportive of your work and your journey?

DB: For me, I don’t need them to make a show of it by commenting or sharing their thoughts publicly to know they support me. There was a point in time where they did all they could do for me, but ultimately it had to be my choice to make the decision to get clean. Thankfully, we’ve been rebuilding our relationship over the last few years. And being in the public eye for most of our lives, the last thing we want is for outsiders thinking they have a say in our lives. In short, yes I have very supportive parents in all aspects of my life and I’m so happy for that.

AG: This is your second project since rehab, are you viewing this as a comeback or a fresh start?

DB: Comeback? I didn’t know I left… Kidding! Sure, some might say it’s a comeback. A fresh start. Whatever analogy best fits the narrative is fine by me— and I don’t mean that negatively in any sense. I mean, you’ve known me long enough to know I just try not to focus on any of that stuff, messes with my fucking brain waves. I just see it as me doing what I love with a new perspective and a different approach to choosing what projects I’m going to give my time to than I have in the past.

AG: What can you tell us about this project and the character you're playing?

DB: I had the best f*ckin’ time while shooting this film— sorry, but the emphasis was needed. I was really drawn to the vibrancy that this script evoked, even with the serious nature of the storyline and characters. I couldn’t stop thinking or talking about for weeks afterwards. I’d sit with my wife at breakfast and we’d discuss the script and my character for what felt like hours. I knew after I heard her feedback that I needed to be apart of this film— she might have said I’d be stupid to say no to it, in her own loving way.

The film is really about the process of rediscovering yourself. Navigating the challenges that come along with being at your lowest point and leaning on the ones who have been there for you. It’s about finding love in its purest form when you never thought you were deserving of it.

I found bits of myself in this character as we were filming, it was very much a cathartic experience for me. I guess you could say it was art imitating life in a weird way.

AG: There's already been some buzz about this year's award season, do you think this is finally your year?

DB: Ooooh! Is it too presumptuous for me to say yes?! I’ve started dusting the spot where I plan for it to go. I sound like some sort of pompous idiot! Now no one is going to go see it!*

I take it back!

In all seriousness, ‘cause I’m sure Poppy and my agent will be rolling their eyes when they read this. If all I get is a couple nominations, that alone feels like winning. A shiny statue would be nice though— just saying.

AG: You've talked often about your love of art and you recently purchased a gallery. Are you planning to publicly pursue other creative endeavors?

DB: I won’t be joining American Idol anytime soon if that’s what you’re asking. Oh, you weren’t referring to my ability to hold a note during our many karaoke nights— noted!

How did you put it? Other creative endeavors? I’ve got a few art pieces in the works right now that I’m itching to dive back into when I get home. I’ve got a major gallery in LA lined up later in the year for an artist spotlight exhibit, they’ll be housing some of my work through the next year. Shoutout to my wife for getting that all lined up while I was away shooting this film.

AG: What's next for Dieter Bravo? Any other projects lined up you can tell us about?

DB: I’m looking forward to some downtime I have coming up. Poppy has the summer off, so we’ll get to finally live that newlywed life. Settle into the role of doting husband while she does her thing at the gallery.

AG: Off the record, if you got married and didn't tell anyone I will kick yours and Poppy’s ass!

DB: We’re celebrating our one year this month actually. We eloped quietly last year right after we got engaged— wanted to keep it to ourselves for a little while. Which reminds me, you and Bryony should hop on a call with Poppy after this. Seeing as I let the cat out of the bag and this is our announcement— surprise!

Huge shoutout out to @gnpwdrnwhiskey for allowing me to borrow her Ava from Conversations with a Movie Star for this. Ava was so gracious and even wrote the questions herself. I’m so grateful for Lellen and all her support and advice she had given me throughout the writing process of Sweet Creature!

Sweet Creature Celebration

#dieter bravo #dieter x poppy #sweet creature series #sweet creature celebration #dieter bravo x reader #dieter bravo x you #pedro pascal

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kpopscruggles · 1 day

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Do you think you could write something like jay has a secret crush on the reader ( in a school setting) ,like Everytime he tries to make a move on her she thinks he's just being nice ( can u make him kind of controlling ) and eventually he can't take it anymore so he does something wild ( u can choose yk anything spicy) so she'll finally understand.

I hope that wasn't vague or unclear , if it is let me know and I'll answer anything, if you could please write that it would be nice :)

MINE

It’s like 1200 words I’m sorry-

It’s also takes place in the school bathroom….

Anyway…hope you like it even though I kinda got carried away…

Notproofreadwell

———

He needed it, it was itching at his skin in a way that clawing at himself couldn’t satisfy. Jay was a sweet guy; he knew that himself but something about you just made him disgusted with himself. The way he would do the filthiest things for you were all round questionable. He knew you had no idea the lengths he’d go for you, and that was something that fueled the flame for him. You were so blinded by the friendship you didn’t even notice how he secretly poured his feelings out to you every time.

“I just think you should do better than his is all, why go on a date with something like that? And too the schools basketball game?” He questions while playing with the beads on your bracelet, trying not to salivate just knowing he could feel your warm skin. Being angry at the fact you agreed to go to the game or doing anything alone with Heeseung and hiding a boner because he smelt your perfume wasn’t the combo he wanted to deal with the rest of the day. Another thing is Heeseung should know you belonged to him “You’d be better off staying with me like we do every weekend, and you know that heeseung is a disgusting choice so why go?”. Watching you laugh at this was ridiculous “Im not joking, you know I’m not”.

“What would we do besides sit there?” Your response made his hand go to your leg and his groaned “Anything...”. He watched as you glanced at his hand now placed on your thigh before you chuckled again. That fucking chuckle that made him sick to his stomach at how naive you were that he needed you. “Don’t be dumb babe...why is see the basketball game with heeseung when you could do it with me?’. “Its just one night. One night, thats all it took for heeseung though was one night to make you cum and jay was going to go livid.

B-lining it to your place after a while he wanted to spend some time with you, when arriving it was the usual hug and a kiss on the cheek for fun. He noticed it caught you off guard a little but he didn’t mind. “I still think you could stay here with me” he felt like he was so close to having you, he wasn’t going to give up yet. Seeing you look at him in such a manner let him know you were thinking about it.

——

This why you guys we’re here…what lead you guys here is what should be said. Jay currently watched you from afar, every wiggle you did gave him a smile of satisfaction as he thought back one last time. How you denied you wouldn’t do such a thing but how Jay was still so precious to you…the nibbling on your lips giving you away after you said such a thing. Accepting the offer made his head spin a little though, he wasn’t going to lie about that. It just satisfied him that he didn’t have to give a full speech of how he loved you like he thought he would.

Heeseung wasn’t going to know a thing either, he was too blind himself. He didn’t know that your clit was being obliterated by the vibrating panties that you put on just to make jay so happy. You weren’t blind anymore, no longer h didn’t the truth in the back of your mind that jay needed you for himself. The panties you were wearing and his control on them told you very well how he felt. You knew it was more than just a little toy jay thought would be fun. It was his way to know he was yours….

Every simple touch heeseung gave, the toy fight back. It was a little way to let you know who you belonged too. This wasn’t working anymore though, you needed that push more and more with every neglected orgasm. You needed jay, you needed him buried inside you. It was a need now.

The simple text telling him you we’re going to the bathroom was enough to let him know too. Before you knew it your body had a mind of its own, pulling him into the stall and smashing your lips to his. The moans we let out sounded so much more filthier when muffled by our kisses. “You better fuck me like you mean it~” you moaned as his lips moved to your jaw. All you could revive in that moment was a simple “mhm”.

Your mini skirt lifted and the panties fell to the floor, your left leg now lifted against the other end of the stall. Jay on his knees just to lick up the wetness that soaked the panties only moments earlier. “Once my cock is in this cunt you’ll never want anyone else~” he moaned taking one last taste before standing once again. Your cunt only gushing more as you heard him unzip his jeans and the jungle of the belt before they fell just enough to pull his cock free. His cock a a painful red, the precum already oozing down his cock.

Swiping it up you licked it clean from your finger, the salty taste satisfying you in a way no food ever would. The satisfaction only growing…. the tingling sensation once jay pushed his tip in, your pussy making room for him. Gushing even more once he was fully inside. “So big~” “all your princess, all yours…”. Eyes rolled back and you knew this wasn’t gonna last long, feeling him pull out and slam back in almost made you cum then!

Feeling his arm hook onto your leg, his hands reached a little further before he was gripping your ass. Holding you still so his cock could just run in and out of you, the filthy moans echoing in the bathroom with each time he bottomed out into you. Feeling that satisfaction of his tip against your cervix making him grow wild. “Look at you~ are those tears? You needed my cock so bad?” His chuckling mocking you “I know you did baby~ and it’s okay…whatever my love wants”.

The tears now pouring enough to fall as you couldn’t hold it, “JAY FUCK- OH GOD~!” Your throat burning from the loud cry and hiccups from the tears. “Good girl~ fuck I’ve always wanted to feel you cumming on my cock…” he whispered before pulling you into one last kiss. Your cunt gushing and tightening around him repeatedly was enough for a groan to leave him as he made sure to bury himself in your cunt before letting his release come undone.

“Your mine, there’s no coming back from that…” he whispered.

#Enhypen smut #Enhypen hard hours #Enhypen hard thoughts #Jay park smut #Enhypen jay smut #Jay park hard hours #jay park hard thoughts #enhypen jay hard thoughts #enhypen jay hard hours #Jay smut #Jay hard hours #jay hard thoughts

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freedomfireflies · 1 day

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feeling like something sweet and fluffy if you’re still taking requests?

i’ve had a rotten day in the world of customer service and just wanna scream lol, your page is very relaxing for me rn

(you already know who i’m gonna mention) teach me harry and y/n having a cute little hypothetical pillow talk chat about their future, just being all lovey dovey? <3

Nooo baby I'm so so sorry!! I hope you're all right, we can absolutely scream a bit if you want hehe THANK YOU FOR SENDING THIS, IT'S ADORABLE AND SO ARE YOU!! I'm always here if you need to talk 💞💞💞

"3. No...4. No...5!"

Harry laughs as he studies you from his side of the bed, his fingers absentmindedly brushing up and down your arm. "5 dogs, huh?"

"Yeah. And a few cats. For balance." You grin. "And maybe some chickens. Or goats!"

"Uh-huh. So, you wanna live on a farm? That's the future you see for us? We're farm folk?"

"We could be," you say. You scoot closer. "We could get out of the city, find a house with a big yard and lots of trees. A pool and a trampoline. And a cozy window nook where we can drink our coffee and watch the sunrise."

His smile is sleepy and soft and it makes your heart race. "I like that," he murmurs. "And in our folksy future...are we married? Do we have any kids?"

"Well duh," you tease, nuzzling your nose against his.

"Yeah? How'd we get married?"

"I think...we got married in the fall," you whisper. "By your parents old house. Next to the water. At sunset. It's small and people are jealous they weren't invited. But it's a beautiful day, and it's perfectly us. You cry when I walk down the aisle and I cry at your vows."

He chuckles.

"We have 3 kids over the next few years. We adopt and foster, and even though we aren't biologically related, the middle one has your eyes." Your run your fingers through his curls fondly. "They love you. A lot. And you stay home as often as you can to help raise them, which they love. They enjoy artsy things and they love being outside. We take them on lots of trips and they're such a handful but we love them anyway. Even though the youngest has an awful temper."

His lashes flutter shut.

"We're happy," you decide, even though he's already falling asleep. "We're really happy. Just us, and our 3 kids, and 5 dogs, and 2 cats, and chickens and goats."

He hums. Faintly. "I like that," he exhales. "We're gonna do that, yeah?"

You smile and press your lips to his.

"I promise."

#harry #harry styles #harry styles concept #concept #teach me #harry and bee #teach me concept #best friend!harry #best friends to lovers #harry styles fanfic #harry styles fluff

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gallavichsreddie1128 · 1 day

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You Belong With Me (Patrick Zweig)

Description: Y/N is in love with Patrick but is convinced he doesn’t feel the same

Word Count: 2,007k

Author’s Note: Please send in requests! I have a few that I’m working on right now but I’m open to whatever

Y/N was in love with Patrick Zweig. She has been since they first met. She met him and Art at a Tennis game and they became close friends. They were a trio and everyone knew it. There was even rumors that they were all fucking each other but unfortunately that wasn’t true. Patrick loved sleeping around but the idea of fucking Y/N never seem to cross his mind. Art saw how Y/N looked at Patrick and he knew that she loved him. Y/N was super jealous anytime that Patrick got a girlfriend or bragged about hooking up with someone. Anytime she’d ask him why he was telling her any of this he just told her that “you’re one of the guys.” That hurt.

She had to hide back the tears that threatened to spill from her eyes as she gave him a fake smile. He never saw her like that. It got so much worse when Tashi Duncan came into their lives. Both boys were swooning over her and it made Y/N jealous. Tashi was nice to Y/N though. She teased her about her friendship with both guys but never had any ill feelings towards her. Patrick and Art reassured Tashi that y/n was just a friend after the homewrecker comment. Y/N had to hide her jealousness and sadness hearing about the night the three of them had together. Patrick wouldn’t shut up about it but like a good friend Y/N just told him that was crazy and awesome for him.

“Yeah she said whoever won our tennis game could get her number.” Y/N hoped that he lost it. He didn’t and thus began Tashi and Patrick’s relationship. Y/N watched them be all lovey dovey while her and Art were seething. Art had it bad for Tashi and y/n wasn’t oblivious to it. Y/N and Art went to Tashi’s game together and waited for Patrick. “Where is he?” Y/N asked. Art decided to text him and got a response back moments later. “They are fighting so he’s not coming.” Y/N sorta felt happy that they were fighting but she knew that was wrong.

She could see on Art’s face that he felt the same way. Y/N gasped as Tashi broke her knee. Her and Art got up immediately and ran to her. Her cries and screams sounded awful and Y/N felt so bad. Her and Art sat with her when Patrick arrived. Tashi screamed at him to get out but he wouldn’t listen so Art did, “Get out Patrick.” Patrick looked at them and looked at Y/N. She opened her mouth but words didn’t come so he walked out. Y/N debated on going after him but knew it wasn’t right. She would have to talk to him later. “Why didn’t you say anything in the room?” He asked her as he showed up to her room.

She wanted to scream that she loved him and she was tired of being one of the guys but didn’t. “I don’t know. Everything just happened so fast.” She said softly. “He wants her, you know that right?” “What?” “Art wants her so he caused all of this.” Y/N looked at him confused. “What do you mean Art caused this?” “The whole reason we were fighting was because of Art and cuz I suck at Tennis?” Y/N was shocked that Art would be the cause. Did Tashi like Art? “You don’t suck at Tennis.” She tells him. He smiles but shakes his head. “According to her I do.” “Well she’s wrong.” Y/N thought that he was great at Tennis. Art and him kinda had a fallout after that but Y/N still kept in contact especially since they all went to the same college and even after that.

Patrick was a mess that Y/N had to clean up constantly. “Thanks for being here.” He says to her as they drive to a hotel. “No problem.” “Are you sure you don’t mind paying? I’ll pay you back as soon as I get the money.” She laughs and shakes her head. “All good.” They got to the hotel and y/n paid. Y/N had a big girl job and never went pro in Tennis but still made a lot of money. “Are you hungry?” She asked as they got to the hotel room. “Yeah, a lot.” “Let’s go get some food then.” She said. While they were getting food she got a text from Tashi that told her they would be at the challengers. Y/N jaw dropped and looked up at Patrick who was scarfing down the food they got.

“So I have some news and I don’t know if you’re going to like it.” She says. He looks at her with a mouth full of food. He motions for her to keep talking. “Art is going to be there. Playing against you.” Patrick almost chokes on his food. “What?” He asked, Y/N nodded. “Tashi just texted me.” Y/N was excited to see her old friends. Patrick wasn’t. “Girl it’s so good to see you.” Tashi said and hugged her old friend. Y/N hugged her back and said the same. “Hi Y/N.” Art said and hugged her. “I missed you both so much.” “Did Tashi tell you that I was here?” Art asked, not knowing that Patrick was here. “Yes.” Y/N gulped. Neither of them knew of Patrick’s presence. “Awesome! I’m glad you came. I have to go practice.” He said and walked away.

Tashi looked at Y/N suspecting something. She never was good at hiding anything. “What is it?” Tashi asked. Y/N looked at her and shrugged. “I just can’t believe you guys are here.” Tashi raised an eyebrow at her. “He’s here isn’t he?” Y/N nodded and Tashi rolled her eyes. “He was here before you guys were. I got your text at the hotel.” She told her. “Art’s gonna freak out and think that I planned it all.” “I don’t think Art’s gonna think that.” Y/N tried telling her. “We gotta keep them away from each other.” Y/N agreed. Patrick won all of the rounds leading up to the finales as did Art. For the most part they hadn’t seen each other but knew that they were there. As Y/N and Patrick were drinking and talking he kept looking away from her and staring at something else.

“What’s wrong?” She asked him and he snapped out of it. “Nothing.” He lied. Y/N looked behind her and saw Tashi. She looked back at him with a “really?” face. He sighed, “She’s married.” Y/N exclaimed. He nodded and understood but still got up to go talk to her. Y/N could tell that the conversation wasn’t a pleasant one. Tashi seemed annoyed and when Patrick came to sit back down he told her, “She wants me to stay away from Art.” “I do too.” He looked at his best friend, “What?” She sighed and ran her fingers through her hair.

“Patrick it’s not good for you guys to be around each other and for you to be all over her still.” “I’m not all over her!” “Patrick, yes you are. You have to let her go.” She was right. “I asked her to be my coach.” Y/N’s jaw dropped. “You did not?” He nodded his head. “I did and I think she might do it.” Y/N sighed, “You’re a dumbass.” She breathes out. “It could be good for me,Y/N.” She knew that Patrick wanted her and it disgusted her. She sighed and shook her head, “I don’t know what’s good for you, Patrick.” Though that night he got exactly what he wanted.

With a price of course that he wasn’t even sure he was going to do. “I want you to lose.” Tashi said to him. He wanted to laugh in her face but he also wanted to fuck her so he was in between. “I’ll do it.” He ended up telling her but there was always a I’ll do it but you have to do…with Patrick. So when it was all said and done Tashi looked up at him. “She loves you, you know.” He looked down at the woman with confusion written all over his face. “Who?” She rolled her eyes. “Y/N.” Patrick didn’t believe that, not even for a second. “Yeah right.” He said and pushed Tashi off him the best that he could.

She sat up and huffed. “I know it’s ridiculous that she loves someone like you but it’s true.” “And you fucked me? Knowing this.” “I’m not her best friend, you are.” He sat up as well. “Okay let’s say that you’re right. Why haven’t I noticed?” She looked at him like he was stupid. “Cuz you’re stupid.” He took in her words as they sat in his car. Was his best friend really in love with him? “Why hasn’t she told me yet? It’s been 15 years.” “Cuz Patrick you’ve been with girl after girl. She doesn’t think you feel the same way.”

He got back to the hotel around 2:30 am. Y/N sat on the bed waiting for him. He opened the door to be greeted by her. “Where were you?” She asked in a whisper. “Out.” She rolled her eyes, “clearly but what were you doing?” “Tashi wants me to throw the competition.” He ignores her question. She sighed. “Of course you were with her. Patrick she’s married she doesn’t need you to fuck things up for her.”

“You act like she didn’t call me to hook up.” Y/N stood up from the bed. “She what? You what?” He rolled his eyes. “We had sex okay? But only so I would lose tomorrow.” “Patrick, that's not okay at all. That’s really shitty.” “You know what else is shitty? Not telling your best friend that you’ve been in love with him for 15 years.” Her eyes widened at his words. “What?” She whispered. “You’re in love with me and you’ve been for 15 years!” She breathed out a breath she wasn’t aware she was holding.

“I am. But I shouldn’t be. I mean you’re a bum, Patrick. And it seems like you use me and even though I know I shouldn’t. I do and I would die for you, Patrick. But you love her and you always have and you always will. I’m just one of the guys to you.” She had tears in her eyes as she said those things. Patrick looked at her, “you really feel that way about me?” He asked. “Yes but I still love you. I’ll always love you Patrick Zweig.” She said. He walked up to her and cupped her face. The tears that were falling from her face landing on his hand. “I’m such an idiot.” “What?” He kissed her, hard and full of passion.

She kissed him back like she waited 15 years for this kiss. Standing in the room, in the moonlight as they moved their lips together until they need air. “But Tashi. You love her.” He shook his head. “No I don’t.” He said and kissed her again. This time they fall onto the bed not breaking the kiss. She moved to straddle him, not breaking the kiss. His hands moved up her back and hers placed on his chest. She moved to cup his jaw and deepened the kiss.

This was a dream come true for her. No matter how shitty he was, she would always love him. She pulled away from the kiss and started kissing his neck. “Wait stop.” He said and she pulled away, confused. “What’s wrong?” She asked. “You don’t deserve this.” She stared at him with the same look. “I want to take you on a date before we have sex.” She was shocked by his words. Patrick was never known to be a date guy. “After I win tomorrow. I will take you out.” “So you aren't throwing it?” He shook his head. “Hell No.” He said, making her laugh. “And if you lose?” “I’ll still take you out.” “You’ll pay?” He nodded and kissed her again. “I’ll pay.”

#challengers movie #challengers 2024 #patrick zweig #art donaldson #tashi duncan #mike faist #josh o'connor #zendaya #patrick zweig x reader #patrick zweig imagine #patrick zweig x you

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diamonds-of-the-first-water · 16 hours

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It’s Polin Season

*Spoilers ahead for Bridgerton Season 3 part 1*

so i finished part 1 and oh my god. it was great. i’m gonna rewatch it later, but i want to list some of my favorite things after first watch (i’ll probably forget things I have been awake all night and am sleep deprived but oh well)

colin and el being elusive with one another about their activities

colin having a wet dream after one kiss

colin groping penelope like she was gonna float away

penelope’s new wardrobe and hair (they suit her so well)

PRUDANK

FROHN

phillipa not understanding how a baby is made or born and wondering why her husband has to change his pants after they kiss

surprisingly the music choices! when they were initially released i was wary but they all seem to fit the moment (aside from dynamite which was kinda just there?)

the carriage ride was even better than i imagined and i have imagined it many different ways so bravo team

ending with an almost direct book quote (for gods sake penelope featherington are you going to marry me or not?) chefs kiss. absolutely zero notes

for the show i’m glad the whistledown reveal wasn’t before the carriage scene it wouldn’t have made sense and there wouldn’t have been enough time to resolve it

honestly cressida makes much more sense as a character to me this season but it still doesn’t excuse her being a bully ( i like her but i love pen so)

marcus anderson seems like a good match for violet and i want to learn more about him

we got to see happy kanthony without them overshadowing the new couple (much like daphne in the first season)

things i didn’t like very much

another plot about benedict sleeping with some woman who will no longer be relevant next season

cressida being straight. this is wrong, do it again and get it right this time.

i honestly would have preferred penelope break off the engagement because she’s still in love with colin than debling doing it for her, but the tension cause of the broken engagement was sweet

though i’m glad kanthony wasn’t overused i still wish they showed up more in part 1, i know they will be back but still. at least one other episode

lady danbury and penelope’s relationship isn’t as strong as it is in the books. mind you polin names their first kid after her.

summary:

with what I have seen so far i almost wish we had gotten weekly releases instead. ideally we’d get the whole thing at once but if that wasn’t an option weekly would have been nice. i’m kinda tired of the binge model. overall i loved part 1 and will definitely be rewatching it later

more thoughts to come! thank you nicola and luke for doing our polin justice

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otomehonyaku · 1 day

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Diabolik Lovers Lost Eden Stellaworth Tokuten Short Stories スペシャル特典小冊子 ☽ Ruki ver.

This short story booklet was part of the Stellaworth set for Lost Eden! Keep reading below the cut for Ruki's version. Yuma's, Kou's,and Azusa's are coming soon!

[Yuma's version] [Kou's version] [Azusa's version]

Special thanks to @karleksmumskladdkaka for providing the scans ♡⸜(˃ ᵕ ˂ )⸝

─── ･｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

When I think about it, I have rarely been alone since those three became my brothers. It is not that we spent 24 hours a day in each other’s presence, but the fact that I had people to call family again after losing everything eased my loneliness.

I wonder if that’s the reason why I am still genuinely not used to not being in the pictures that my brothers send us from time to time, even though I don’t really want to admit it.

The one who’d made the suggestion after a while of living together was her.

“Why don’t we send them something back?”

And so the seed was planted.

“If I’m also thinking of sending them pictures, then they must be thinking the same thing at home,” she told me with a smile, “so I’m sure they’ll be happy if we do.”

I knew that she had a point, but there was a certain awkwardness to taking staged pictures with her and sending them to my brothers. I considered flatly rejecting the idea at first because I thought it was embarrassing, but I came around immediately when I remembered the way her face had brightened when she brought it up.

The two of us ran away from the human world. From Kou, Yuma, and Azusa. Ever since she and I started living together in a crumbling Eden, I have begun to realise something–I have become completely beguiled by her. Or, rather, I might have had a soft spot for her since the beginning, but lately, the moments when I dropped my guard around her have increased considerably. Of course, I cannot convince myself to tell her that.

It’s only natural when I consider all we have been through together. To stay behind in Eden even after the war ended, then, was nothing but my own selfish idea. She was under no obligation to join me.

Nevertheless, she has stayed with me all this time, and she has truly helped make the best out of every day. It’s simply impossible not to love her for that, even though I know she had wanted to be by my side from the beginning.

In all honesty, I am happy. Maybe that’s what has turned me into such a softie, I thought, smiling wryly. I was loath to admit it, but the plain fact that I had found happiness with her was probably the reason why.

“Ruki… Don’t you want to take a picture?” She gazed at me a little nervously. Maybe she thought she had upset me because I had kept quiet.

“No, it’s a good idea. Like you said, I think Kou and the others would love that.”

“Let’s do it, then!”

“Yes, let’s.”

Before I had even finished speaking, she darted out of the room to get the camera. As I watched her run off, I realised my approval might have pleased her more than it would my brothers. My expression inadvertently softened at the thought.

☽

She told me the camera was a gift from Azusa. Come to think of it, the photo album that my brothers had given me a little while ago had also been Azusa’s idea.

“Smile!”

“...Wait.”

I grasped her hand before she could click the shutter.

“What’s the fun in a picture of me by myself? Get over here.”

She hesitated a little, making some foolish suggestions on how we should take our picture, but I ignored her and snaked an arm around her waist. Holding her close to me would make things much easier.

“This way, you’ll be in the frame too,” I whispered into her ear.

Her shoulders twitched a little as she held her breath, and her ears started to redden. What a hopeless girl. I was sure this was not the side of her she wanted recorded on film for others to see.

If I truly cared for the picture for my brothers, I would have stopped there. However, the feeling of her warm body in my arms was too tempting. I decided to tease her a little more. I leaned down to whisper in her ear again, closer than before.

“Save that face for later tonight.”

Her voice quivered as she whispered my name in response...

Oh, this was bad. I wish I could say that I truly intended to leave it at teasing, but my body was acting on its own.

Sorry, Kou, Yuma, Azusa–you will have to wait for the picture a little longer.

However, when she understood that I wanted to take the camera from her, she spoke.

“But… we really are going to send them a picture, right?” So, let’s actually take a proper picture. Her unspoken words lingered in the air. She had gotten more perceptive recently.

“...Of course. Let’s continue this tonight, then.”

I let out a heavy sigh.

I really had been going soft, but it could not be helped. Especially not around my lovely wife.

#I'll do the Kou/Azusa ones too! the other ones maybe later #i'm going to focus on translating the novelization first after this #diabolik lovers translation #diabolik lovers translations #dialovers #diabolik lovers #diabolik lovers lost eden #lost eden #mukami yuma #mukami ruki #ruki mukami #yuma mukami #otomehonyaku #my translations

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writerfae · 11 hours

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Okay! Here's the promised ask! (Idk if I'll get to everyone's parents, so sorry for everyone who gets left out)

Now, I don't know if you meant writing for them before they had kids, so this will probably be a mix

Starting off with Ranva and Milan, of course! (Their's will probably be the longest because... yeah)

Milan seeing Ranva for the first time and he's jaw drops, because look at her!

I think hearing about the time when Milan helps Ranva get away from the fae realm would be really interesting (plus baby Henry 🥺)

Ranva having the exact opposite problem of Henry, as in he had to adjust to the fae realm and her to the human realm (the parallels of these two kill me every day)

I'm actually really interested in the time before Aiden was born (as in they're already in the human realm, but he's not born yet), because we never hear about it

(or rarely)

Fenna and Cyrus

Ngl I keep thinking about modern au them, because cute baker Fenna is top tear!

Also, that thing you mentioned about Fenna holding Cyrus after their son died

Also, them just bickering 🥺

Hela's parents

I don't think I know a lot about her dad (or if I do, I forgot again)

And her mom looking for her, and her being mischievous is adorable ❤️

Now... I know very, very little about Maya's mom... so... sorry❤️

And meanwhile I want to come up with something fluffly for my guys but I've got nothing...

But listen 👏 (I think I made a post like this actually, but I was listening to the song again, so:)

Bendegúz: The soldier

Ákos: The poet

Endre: The king

Adél: The one who's singing

(Yes, I love going on rants about songs and my ocs. When I go on a rant about an Odette song that will be... well, you know what she's like🤣 there'll be emotions( but her playlist is one of the best)

Also, can you imagine Endre holding up Ákos to your ocs lion king style 🤣

Thanks, that’s so nice of you ^^

My initial thought was to write fluff for them as couples (with no kids) but since I have no actual plans for this god knows when I’ll even get around to do this I’m open for everything!

Milan was completely star struck when he met Ranva. Ranva’s sister noticed it first and told her. They were both giggling like crazy stealing glances at him stealing glances at Ranva xD and at one point he gathered his courage and really formally introduced himself, with hand-kiss and all.

To be honest, Ranva’s sister, her teacher and her maid were the ones who had the most part in arranging her and Milan’s “escape”. More interesting is probably the time before that (their secret meetings, Ranva telling Milan about Henry and about wanting to leave with them) and after (Milan helping her adjust, helping her with Henry, refusing to hunt for people who talked bad about his wife).

The way Henry’s story is mirroring his mother’s (but reverse) is one of my favorite things about the two. Also how different yet similar their way of freedom looks like!

When Aiden was born, Ranva already spent six years in the human realm. In the time till his birth a lot of her adjusting and dealing with missing home happened. Her learning some customs she had to adopt. Her making friends with Holly. Her, Milan and Henry being a happy little family despite some sullen grumbles from other villagers.

I wouldn’t really know what to tell you about it though, if you don’t have specific questions…

Fenna is already adorable, but baker Fenna from the modern au is even more so! Her and young Cyrus meeting in France is so cute too. I like thinking about younger them lately, even in canon. Not that they’d play any role significant enough for me to think about them, but I do and I adore them xD

The thing is that Fenna loves Cyrus. She remembers the man he used to be and she still sees that man in him, deep down. She’s hoping to one day get him back out. He might never be the same like he was before they lost Thorin, but she holds on to him because she knows deep down he’s still a good man. Flawed, but good. And she loves and believes in him still, though she doesn’t approve of the way he handles his relationship to their kids.

Halea’s parents’ names are Arian and Sofia. They are actually least developed, so I can’t tell you much about them. Except for that Sofia is originally from the Oak court, where her mother was one of the queen’s ladies. And Arian is head of the House of Hummingbirds, who married her and took her to the Willow court with him.

It’s funny how you know little about Maya’s mother, yet she’s the first parent beside Milan and Ranva that actually got a backstory xD

Gwen is a witch. She and her family before her, like many witches, were follower of the old ways. Which is what you call people in the human world that still believe in the old religion (the goddesses, the existence of fae and magic…) and follow old customs.

She grew up living with her grandmother and mother in their little cottage by the forest. She learned the old ways and her craft from them. Now she couldn’t do real magic, since humans are incapable of it, but she knew old rituals and little “spells” and knew how to make potions and (lucky) charms and she knew lots about herbs.

She and Maya lived from what Gwen sold on the big market in their hometown. Things like wool, eggs and goat milk and woven baskets. Dried herbs, balms and medicine. But also charms, potions and other stuff for the more “superstitious” people. Ranva was one of her customers, too.

Gwen was never interested in marriage. But she did want a child. Which is why she wished for Maya!

Oh yeah I remember you mentioning that! I think it fits your characters very well (both the song and the positions you applied to them like who’s the king and who’s the poet…)

Music can be a very good way to get close to our characters! I like doing that a lot too!

#under the cut cause otherwise this is too long in general xD #writer speaks #writeblr #wip: the knights of the alder

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vodika-vibes · 3 days

Note

Hello! I've been reading a lot of your content lately and love your writing so much! I was wondering if I could request a little fic about Dogma x a very outgoing, naturally confident social butterfly kind of reader who works on base and a lot of clones seem really into them, but they only ever flirt with him or try to ask him out. And their admirers can't figure out why Dogma of all people but the reader has no kriffs to give and just keeps giving him all their romantic attention until he gets it. Thanks in advance!

Two Souls Intertwined

Summary: You’ve made your choice, you just have to convince Dogma that you mean it.

Pairing: Clone Trooper Dogma x GN!Reader

Word Count: 886

Warnings: None

Tagging: @trixie2023 @n0vqni @imabeautifulbutterfly

A/N: Hihi! Thank you for your request! I'm always happy to write for Dogma, so I hope you like this!

“Let me see if I understand you correctly,” You don’t look up from the game you’re playing on your comm as your coworker, and sometimes friend, drops into the seat across from you. “You’re surrounded by attractive men. At all times. And you want Dogma?”

You glance up at the way she says Dogma’s name, “What’s wrong with Dogma?” You ask, offended on his behalf.

“Well...he’s just...he’s not much fun, is he?”

“He doesn’t have to be fun, I like him anyway.”

“Just…” She shakes her head, “I know that so many of the men have a thing for you. And you’re, like, scraping the bottom of the barrel.”

You scowl at her, “I’ve made my choice, and, just for your comments, I’m going to go flirt with him even harder.”

She chokes on her caf, “I...what?”

You throw a cocky grin at her, and push to your feet, downing your caf in one long gulp, before you head out of the break room.

At this time of day, Dogma is probably outside. He likes to take what free time he’s allowed to read something. For a moment, just a moment, you feel bad about interrupting his free time, though you push the guilt aside with ease.

It’s not like he’s ever said, “Leave me alone,” after all.

You head through the halls, and open the door that leads to the courtyard in the middle of the base.

Why this base has a courtyard is beyond you, but you’re glad it does. It offers a nice change of pace from the sterile white and gray halls of the base.

And there he is, sitting under a tree with a datapad in his hands.

A bright smile crosses your face and you dutifully ignore the way that your heart skips when you see him.

You’re well and truly in love with him.

Dogma doesn’t say anything as you walk over to him, and he says nothing as you settle onto the ground next to him. Though he does glance at you when you shift so that your back is pressed against his arm and your head is tilted back to rest on his shoulder.

“Back again?” He sounds more amused than anything.

“Always.” You counter cheerfully.

“You are determined, aren’t you?”

You tilt your head back so you’re able to grin at him.

Dogma’s smile is tiny, but it is there, “Alright. Lay it on me.”

“What?��

“Today’s pick up line.”

You press a hand to your chest, a look of mock offense crossing your face, “I would never-”

“Ah, so I’ve been imagining all of those other pick-up lines, then?” Dogma asks with an arched brow, and you laugh and shift so you’re sitting next to him properly, “You know, my brothers are convinced that you’re using those just to get a reaction out of me.”

You roll your eyes, “They’re just jealous that I only have eyes for you.”

“Or they don’t believe it.” Dogma points out, “I’m sure that there are people who are more similar to you in personality than me.”

“Eh, maybe. But I’m not interested in them, I’m interested in you.” You reply.

Dogma sighs and rubs his hand over his face, “You...someday I’m going to actually believe you when you say stuff like that, and then what are you going to do?”

“Plan our date. Well, schedule our date. I already have our first date planned. We’ll get dinner and go for a walk, and then I’ll kiss you on the way home.” You nod once, “It’ll be perfect.”

He blinks at you, surprised.

You flash a crooked smile, “What? Is it really so hard to believe that I only have eyes for you?”

“Yeah, a little bit.”

“Hm, well then.” You muse thoughtfully, “How about this then? I’m in love with you.”

Dogma jolts in surprise, and you smile at him.

“I’m in love with you, and if you’re really not interested then let me know and I’ll leave you alone. But. Until that happens, I’m going to keep pursuing you.”

“...you’re in love with me?” He asks slowly.

“Yes.”

“Why?”

“Do I need a reason? I like you. You make me feel safe when I’m around you. You don’t judge me for being me.” Your grin widens, “I love you.”

Dogma releases a strangled noise and lifts his datapad to hide his face, “You’re impossible.” he complains, though he drops the datapad and flashes a small smile, “I’d like that date, actually.”

“...really?”

“Really.”

You laugh and fling your arms around him, knocking you both over, “Thank you! It’ll be the best date! You’ll see!”

Dogma just laughs and folds his arms around you, “I’m looking forward to it.” He replies, a warm smile on his face, “But I need you to get off of me.”

“Oh, right. Sorry.” You scramble off of him and settle on the grass next to him as he sits back up. “What are you reading, anyway?”

“Want me to read to you?”

“Will you?”

“Yeah,” He flips back to the start of the book, “Get comfortable.”

You shift and drop your head to his shoulder, and as soon as you’re settled, he started reading.

And this, really, is all you ever wanted. Who cares if no one else understands. You certainly don’t.

#star wars #tcw #clone trooper dogma x reader #dogma x reader #star wars fanfiction #x reader fanfiction #gn!reader fic #answered asks

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sysmedsaresexist · 2 days

Note

What you're doing is incredibly brave. We really appreciate the risk you're taking sharing your journey. It's awesome to see someone so vocal and with such reach openly change their stance.

We wanna know some of your thoughts about something you've been saying in all of this, about CDDs being separate from endogenic plurality. Specifically, your thoughts on when the two do meet. Like, endogenic systems that get traumatized and develop CDD symptoms? Or CDD systems that practice headmate creation, and find created headmates working like the rest of their system? Or folks in either category that relate a lot with those in the other?

We're curious because we exist in that in-between; a system with DID due to trauma, but that doesn't view our plurality itself as coming from trauma.

And if you're not at all interested in that area of overlap, or in sharing those thoughts, no worries! Have a great day!

This is a pretty nuanced ask and each mod has a different view on things, so we'll all answer!

Mod Signal: I believe that endogenic plurality and the plurality found in CDD systems works differently, but that intersection you're talking about can exist. The majority of resources for CDD systems involve how to deal with trauma and different alters reactions to it. If an endogenic system goes through some shit and gets trauma later in life, and can get use out of grounding guides, or how to deal with flooding, I say use those guides (and literally anyone can improve their mental health from therapy as long as the therapist. You know. Isn't a cunt.) That being said. There are also endos who are very certain they're endos when they may have.... a bit more trauma than they thought. And that's normal. Incredibly so. But endogenic communities can lead to a bit more harm than good occasionally with those systems if they insist that the system in question isn't or couldn't be a cdd system, or encourages them not to look into resources on how to deal with trauma.

As far as purposefully created alters, they absolutely exist, and I know CDD systems that have created alters with it going ok, and CDD systems who have been *horribly* hurt trying. I've seen some tulpamancy guides out there that made me wince the whole time I've read them. Not because they're cringy, but because any time a CDD system fucks around with purposeful dissociation, it's Incredibly easy to fuck yourself up by accident. Even some guides to meditation can be harmful to systems if you don't go slowly and pay attention to your body (something that's already very, very easy to ignore if your system, like mine, is made of 90% pain holders lol).

It's for that reason that i haven't changed my pinned intro as "endo-neutral". I dont doubt endogenic plurality at all, but I still find a lot of critiques in the way the two communities mix. The labels are fucked anyway lol so. I dont know what label would best fit that stance. The problem does seem to be slowly fixing itself though. I'm happy that a lot of endos are leaning away from terms used by CDD systems. I view these problems for the most part as growing pains that will smooth themselves over as plurality in general becomes more accepted and more research about both sets of systems comes out.

Mod Quill: I’m feel like that’s a great jumping off point for me, someone who is so weird with syscourse that labels don’t fit me. I believe in endogenic plurality, I really do, but I also know this community has done so much harm to CDDs and vice versa. Part of me wants everyone to go to time out corners and think about what they’ve done.

In terms of the overlap between endogenic and CDD systems… I think defining it, at this point, is frankly meaningless, particularly for the reasons Signal stated. There’s so many endogenic systems who are actually CDD systems. On one hand, I want them to be able to access CDD spaces because, well, they have a CDD… but on the other, as someone who’s been horrifically damaged by endogenic spaces, who has spread a lot of misinformation and been fed a lot of misinformation due to those experiences… I’m wary of letting someone like that into a highly fucking traumatized space. (But I also have feelings about CDD spaces in general…)

At the end of the day, I feel like it’s not my place to draw that line. It’s up to each individual and their own system where they draw the line, and so long as it’s in-line with current understandings of CDDs and they don’t speak their personal experiences as if they’re gospel truth for all systems, I have no issues. If someone says they have endogenic DID (as in, they formed DID with absolutely no trauma), it’s not my place to directly confront that person and tell them that’s not possible; but if they shout from the heavens about how people are ignoring the truth, I’m going to post the truth as I know it, with sources to back it up.

The same goes for this overlap. A system who says “Hey, I have created alters, and I’m a DID system, and those things overlap?” Cool! Awesome! That’s actually my type of system. A system who goes, “Therefore, DID systems should split new alters for the benefits it has”? Allow me to traumadump about how my system completely destabilized due to that practice. The overlap is there, but it’s not for me to define for others; not unless they make their experiences universal.

Mod Robo: Oh boy, I have a lot of Thoughts on all of these questions! It's stuff I think about often. I love talking about all the in-betweens and overlaps, and I'd love to hear about your experiences too. Unfortunately, I don't think I can jam all of my thoughts in this post (it's already long enough) so I'll just talk about your first question.

First off, I want to say that I don't think it's all that unusual for someone with a CDD to feel like they've always been plural, even before their CDD. Of course, spiritual beliefs can play a role in that. Let's put spiritual reasonings aside though and look at it from a purely psychological view. It's our belief that all of our alters -- everything that can be them, will become them, etc. -- it's all there from the start. We don't believe that alters come out of a vacuum. All of my alters were born the day our body was born. Many of us did not exist as alters yet, but the foundation for us existed!

To give a personal example: some of us have memories of childhood that predate our existence as alters. These memories predate our knowledge of being a system or having DID. We've wondered how it's possible to have memories that predate our existence as alters. How is it possible for several alters to have these same memories, and feel as if it's their own but also not? How is it possible that we can't really attribute "who" those memories belong to other than just...us? All of us? It didn't fit into the mainstream idea that alters are supposed to be these distinct, clear-cut people sharing a body, with separate memories and no overlap, no utterance of our existence before becoming a separate alter.

Children aren't born with an integrated self. You probably know the whole spiel -- the mind integrates as you get older, blah blah blah. So, in our opinion, we were never not plural. We had an unintegrated mind full of parts as a child, and we grew up into an adult with an unintegrated mind full of parts and eventually a DID diagnosis.

I get that some people don't see themselves as existing before their CDD and that's okay, I understand that. I also relate to that, in a way! It can be weird to consider because you as the alter didn't exist until later on. But you as the brain did, if that makes sense.

All that being said, I believe that "endogenic CDDs" are a completely separate concept from "endogenic systems with CDDs." CDDs are diagnoses -- they have specified symptoms, diagnostic criteria, and treatment. Diagnoses are not people. You are. That's why plurality is such an incredibly personal thing, after all. We're literally talking about your own mind. Your self/selves. Your internal reality. No duh there are gonna be people who conceptualize and talk about it in different ways. Like, I firmly believe that's NEVER going to be clear cut and easy to understand.

OG Dude: First, I have to say, thank you to my mods. Their responses are fantastic, I support all of them. I brought them all in pretty early, and I wouldn't be where I am without them. Their pro/endo patience while I went back and forth, screamed and yelled... I love them. I love that they saw the good in me and decided to help me run this blog.

I agree with all that they said. For clarity sake, I'll give my own thoughts, even if they overlap or repeat.

I've posted from the beginning about how a lot of things that endogenic systems talked about were actually really normal in DID systems. Created alters, characters that take on life, MADD, loving your system, dysfunction in different areas of life, on and on. I think there's more intersection than a lot of people realize, but I really like how Robo talked about personal views. It took a really long time to realize that people defining their experiences in different ways isn't necessarily a bad thing, though it's unfortunate that sometimes this confuses systems that are still learning.

Yelling and screaming isn't going to help, though. There's another ask coming, this one about my thoughts on sophie, that I think will tie into this point and expand on it a lot more, so for now, I'll move on.

I don't have all the answers. I think CDDs are something extremely specific-- I think in a few more years, diagnosis will involve brain scans, biomarkers, and we'll be able to say with a lot more certainty where that line is, and what's different.

For now, I think I've learned that the best thing I can do for myself, and everyone else, endo or CDD, is just keep pumping out information.

A couple users on here are really good examples of these lines. They have CPTSD, PTSD, whatever else they've got going on, but they still hold the belief that their plurality and CPTSD are unrelated. It took a long time to come to terms with balancing respect for that self-determination, and my expectations of technology and the specificity of CDDs (meaning like, specific biomarkers).

In the end, I realized that it boiled down to, "are people getting the help they need?" Because in the end, that's all that matters, and if someone doesn't think they need help, why am I arguing? If someone does, who am I to keep them from resources?

What if that technology doesn't reach the mainstream, what if it's decades before it's refined enough to be financially feasible in diagnosis? What if people come out with the exact same brain structure as someone with DID and still refuse to admit that the plurality is related?

Well, shit, I don't know, but I'm guessing the answer is still going to be, "Don't yell at them, respect their self-determination."

I still firmly believe that plurality and CDDs are different things. I think that treatment for CPTSD and PTSD are different, and many endos without longterm, repetitive trauma in childhood have PTSD, and would benefit more from those spaces and resources than CDD/CPTSD spaces. However, I also admit that a general PTSD space isn't going to be prepared for the complex interplay of plurality and PTSD. All that said, it's not my job to tell someone which they have, my job should be to present information on both to everyone and let people come to their own conclusions.

It's hard, but it's a skill I'm still trying to learn. Seeing more people talk about their experiences is probably the only thing that's going to help make it easier.

#syscourse #syscourse stance #mod signal #mod quill #mod robo #mod dude #team effort #also mod dude would like to apologize if his part seemed to cut off suddenly #he got distracted by a piece of shit floating down an otherwise pristine river

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