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blu-joons · 3 years

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DATING EXO HEADCANON A⇴Z ⇴ Oh Sehun

A ⇴ AFFECTION

Incredibly affectionate, that’s the best way to describe Sehun. He has a lot of love to give, and that usually ends up coming in the form of either a hug or a kiss, or sometimes just being able to hold onto your hand.

B ⇴ BEFORE DATING

You worked backstage on Busted which was how the two of you met. Sehun had his eye on you quite early on, but he was far too nervous to say anything. He kept a close eye on you throughout the feeling, which was something several other members of cast and crew soon picked up on, encouraging him to at least say hello.

C ⇴ CONFESSION

On the last day of filming, Sehun invited you to one side so that he could talk to you. You weren’t quite sure what was going on until Sehun began to tell you all about how he had been watching you over the past few weeks. When he finished his talk off by inviting you out to dinner, you were definitely taken aback, but you didn’t need much time to accept and go out to dinner with him that night to a nearby restaurant.

D ⇴ DATES

Your dates together were usually quite spontaneous, Sehun loved to see what took your fancy when you stepped outside. He loved the element of surprise, if the two of you spotted something whilst walking around, you’d just head over and give it a try. Whenever he has an event for the group or his acting, he’ll always invite you. He loves to introduce you to his friends and show you what he’s been working on, whilst it might not be a date per se, time spent with Sehun is more than enough for you to enjoy.

E ⇴ EXPERIENCE

You were the first experience of love Sehun had, a lot of the early days were about allowing him to learn about relationships. He was open with you about his fears and worries about dating, but after talking with you, he knew that he had to trust in the two of you. To begin with, he never said a word to anyone about you out of fear something would happen, however overtime, he began to relax a little more and seen began to share more with other people about your relationship and how happy he was with you.

F ⇴ FIGHTING

Sehun isn’t afraid to say what’s on his mind, which can sometimes lead to a bit of miscommunication between the two of you. Once he realises that what he’s said has upset you however, he’ll be quick to realise his own mistake. He values the time he spends with you in amongst his busy schedule so the last thing he wants to do with you during this time is fight. He won’t be able to let an argument settle, as soon as it feels like it’s blowing up, he’ll diffuse the situation and encourage you both to talk about things rather than letting it fester. He won’t leave you alone until an argument is resolved between you both.

G ⇴ GETTING TO KNOW HIS FAMILY

His family were a little apprehensive to meet you, but as soon as they did, they saw exactly why Sehun fell in love with you. They were a little worried about Sehun when he told them that he was dating, but after getting to know you and seeing the two of you together, they soon saw exactly what Sehun saw in you too.

H ⇴ HOME

Sehun only waited a few months before inviting you to move into his place. He was quite keen on having someone around to help and support him. It was only when he moved out, did he realise how much he needed the other members, and whilst they could never be replaced, living with you was just as good, if not better.

I ⇴ “I LOVE YOU”

He was the first one to say, ‘I love you,’ one night when you surprised him at the studio. You weren’t to know, but a visit from you was exactly what he needed. When he saw you, he just couldn’t help but say it as a token of appreciation to how pleased he was to see you. You thought nothing of it but hearing him say he loved you certainly made you smile.

J ⇴ JEALOUSY

Out of the two of you, you tended to get jealous a little more than Sehun. You always knew that he was a social person, and at most events he loved to circulate and speak to people, but that didn’t stop you getting jealous at times. Sehun would be able to tell straight away when you were feeling jealous and would usually place his arm around you to not make a scene around his friends. When the two of you were alone however, he’d be a lot more verbally reassuring and remind you that you were the one he was with.

K ⇴ KIDS

Having children felt like quite a way off for Sehun just yet, but that didn’t stop him from discussing it with you from time to time. He wanted to make it clear to you that he saw children in your future together, just not in the immediate future. He’d often sit to himself and imagine what his future would look like with you and children, even if it wasn’t to happen straight away, Sehun couldn’t wait for the day.

L ⇴ LAUGHTER

Hearing you laugh was one of his favourite sounds in the world, he couldn’t help but laugh whenever he heard you laughing. He loves to mess around with you and wind you up, he’s had plenty of practice over the years with mocking his elder members that he knew exactly how to get a laugh out of people. If you’ve ever had a bad day, he will work hard to put a smile on your face, if there’s one good thing about Sehun, he’s relentless, and he won’t stop trying until your smile is firmly back on your face for him to see.

M ⇴ MISSING

The members are very protective of Sehun as the youngest, so they always pick up on when he’s missing you. They’ll rally around and pick him up and will also send you a text every now and then to maybe nudge you into getting into contact with him. You know that Sehun will try and convince you that he’s alright, so you’re always grateful whenever the boys get in contact with you and let you know what’s really going on. It will take a while for Sehun to admit to how he’s feeling, but once you eventually break down that wall in him, he’ll open up. He works hard to make time for you whenever he’s on the road, at some points it can be a struggle, but he will always find a way even just to say hello to you.

N ⇴ NICKNAMES

Sehun loves nicknames for you, cute names like ‘petal’ and ‘sweet,’ are two of his usual favourites, he loves to change things up and take you by surprise with a cute little name that he knows will make you smile.

O ⇴ OBSESSION

He’s obsessed with your body, he could never pick a favourite part of it, but he loves to have some form of physical contact against you when he’s close to you.

P ⇴ PDA

As he’s in public quite a lot at events and promotions, he’s not afraid to be affectionate with you in public. He’s not someone that will make a big deal out of affection, but it will be enough to make it clear to other people that you’re with him and that’s staying right by your side in order to keep you safe and protected.

Q ⇴ QUESTIONS

Sehun has a very curious mind, so he’ll often ask you questions about the world. He loves to engage in conversation about anything that comes to mind and sit with you and enjoy several debates about random things.

R ⇴ RANDOM FACTS

Very few people are aware of a bracelet that Sehun carries around wherever he goes. It was one he stole from your wardrobe a long time ago when he went away. If he’s wearing long sleeves, he’ll wear it on his wrist, but if his wrists are on show, he’ll tend to place it in his pocket or attach it to a zipper on his outfit, it’s something that you can look out for, but none of the fans or staff will even be able to see it on him.

S ⇴ SEX

He loves to explore and try new things; his curious mind will often get the better of him as he aims to learn more about your money and your needs. Sehun takes great pleasure in taking care of you, he focusses a lot on your insecurities and will take extra time to reassure you about all of them. He loves to whisper into your ear and be as affectionate as possible, anything that will do the trick and put a smile on your face.

T ⇴ TEXTS

His schedules are often busy which means there’s limited time for you. When he can get a moment during those busy days he’ll always send you a text to prove to you that he’s taking care of himself and eating well.

U ⇴ UNIVERSE

For so many years he’d been the baby of the group, but now he liked having someone to look after. He was loyal to you always, once he felt his heart beat around you, he knew that he saw his forever with you.

V ⇴ VACATION

Whenever he went overseas, Sehun would try hard to be able to get you to go with them. He travelled often with everything that he did, but he loved to have you with him. On his days off, he loved to take you out to explore and give you a bit of time with him too away from his busy schedule that constantly interrupted you both.

W ⇴ WHINING

If he didn’t have your attention, Sehun wasn’t afraid to kick up a storm. He’d sit and wait patiently until he had your full attention and then he’d talk.

X ⇴ XXXXX

Sehun is a big fan of kisses, they’re simple ways of constantly reminding you that he loves you in his opinion. He much prefers to kiss you than for you to kiss him, he likes to be with the one to make your heart burst and fill you with a lot of warmth. His kisses can often be spontaneous too, he loves to take you by surprise and appear by your side when you least expect him by pressing a kiss against the side of your face.

Y ⇴ YOU

You were his partner in crime, together the two of you were very mischievous.

Z ⇴ ZZZ

At night, Sehun loved to sit and talk with you. He’d lay tangled up with you, he loved to play with your hair especially whilst you’d tell him what was on your mind, and then lay as he responded and supported you in whatever it was you told him.

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Masterlist

#exo #exo imagine #sehun #sehun imagine #oh sehun #oh sehun imagine #exo drabble #exo sehun #exo scenario #exo reaction #exo one shot #exo fluff #sehun scenario #sehun reaction #sehun one shot #sehun drabble #sehun fluff #kpop #kpop imagine

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angstysebfan · 4 years

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I want to make a request thats absolutely perfect for bucky. Maybe he and the reader have a friendship where everyone knows they like each other but they don't believe it themselves no matter how often they flirt. Bucky workds up the courage to ask her out but some sort of miscommunication or ge overhears something incorrectly leads him to believe that she is going to stand him up(which she doesn't) so before she gets the chance to he stands her up. She's crushed and refuses to hear him out because if they really are friends why would he believe something he overheard. I hope this isn't too much. I miss your writing so much so I really wanted to send this in

Sure thing! Hope you like it @joannie95!!

I Thought...

You have been with the Avengers for about two years. You were rescued from HYDRA after going through years of physical abuse and experiments. When you arrived at the compound you had major trusts issues with everyone, except Bucky. You latched onto him like a lifeline. He was the one who carried you out of that HYDRA facility, and you recognized him immediately as the previous Winter Soldier. Through him you learned to trust the rest of the team and became a member of their family.

Since the day you came to the compound, you and Bucky were practically connected at the hip. He quickly became your best friend, and you became his, besides Steve. Somewhere along the lines both of you developed feelings toward each other, though neither of you would admit it. Everyone saw the looks you both would exchange when you thought no one was looking. They all heard the longing in your voices when you spoke of the other. But the most obvious thing is the flirting back and forth.

One morning you woke up and headed down to the kitchen to grab some coffee, slowly. You walked in and saw Steve, Nat, Wanda, Sam, and Bucky sitting around drinking coffee and eating whatever breakfast they prepared. “Mornin’” you mumble to everyone. You hear a chorus of “mornings” said back as you shuffled to the coffee machine to pour a cup for yourself. Suddenly you feel a kiss on top of your head, and arms wrapped around your waist, “Mornin’ Doll.” Bucky says against your head.

Butterflies go crazy in your stomach as you lean back against Bucky’s chest. “Mornin’ handsome” you say seductively, looking up at him. You can’t help but love his eyes to the point that you would get lost in them if you could. He leans down and kisses your forehead, squeezing your waist and rubbing his thumbs in soft circles. You clear your throat and finally look away and leave the room, your heart pounding in your chest. Bucky watches you leave the room, his own heart pounding.

“Jesus man, can you just man up and ask her out already. I honestly can’t handle how pathetic you look, and the sexual tension is getting to me.” Sam says. Bucky looks at him for a moment, before looking back at the direction you left. “She doesn’t feel that way about me. She just likes to flirt.” Bucky says defeatedly before sitting back down.

“I don’t know Buck. She seems just as interested in you, as you are in her. I think you are both just too scared to admit it to each other.” Steve says. “She is crazy about you, Barnes. She talks about you all the time. Man up and ask her out!” Nat says with a roll of her eyes before leaving the room. Bucky looks at his hands which are resting on the countertop. “I just don’t want to lose her.” he says.

“I’m telling you man, she. likes. you.” Sam says irritated. “You are just too scared to do anything about it. Ask her out!” He yells. Bucky looks at the doorway, sighs, and heads toward your room trying to figure out the words he will say, and silently praying that you really do like him, and that his friends aren’t wrong. He stands in front of your closed door, trying to get the nerve to raise his hand and knock.

When he finally does raise his hand, you suddenly open the door and jump at the sight of him. “Buck? You scared the shit out of me!” you shout punching his shoulder laughing. “Sorry Doll. I had to talk to you about something.” Bucky said sheepishly. You allow him to enter your room and sit next to him on your bed.

“What’s going on, handsome?” you ask, grabbing his hand and rubbing his knuckles with your thumb. Bucky feels the blush coming but somehow finds the courage, “I... uh... would you...” he stutters, losing his confidence as quick as he found it. You grab his face and force him to look at you, “What is it Buck? You know you can tell me,” you say with a soft smile. “Would you... maybe... want to... go out on a date... with... me?” he asks.

You stare at him in shock for a moment. A date? Bucky Barnes is asking you out on a date? You know he is waiting for an answer, and the longer you take, the more fear he has. “Yes.” you say with a small shy smile, cupping Bucky’s cheek. He leans into your touch and smiles. “Tomorrow night, I will pick you up from your room at 7pm.” he says. You nod and kiss the tip of his nose. Bucky stands and heads to your door with a big smile on his face. You said yes. You are going out on a date with him. He was a happy man.

After a work out you went into the kitchen where Sam was eating lunch. “Why is it that I always find you in the kitchen stuffing your face?” you ask him with a laugh. “Well you come during normal meal hours, what am I supposed to do?” he asks in return. You grab a water and your left overs from last nights dinner and sit next to him. “So... I heard from a tin man that you agreed to go out on a date with him.” Sam says with a smirk. “Yea... I... I was tired of hiding my feelings. I’ve been madly in love with that man for so long. I was scared to lose him because he is also my best friend, but when he asked, I thought it was time to come clean with my feelings.” you say, avoiding eye contact with Sam.

“I’ll give you $100 to stand him up.” Sam says. You look at him in shock and see his teasing expression. “Yea, sure. No problem!” you say rolling your eyes. “No seriously, I’m happy for you both. I think this is going to be good for both of you,” Sam said with a genuine smile. “Thanks Sammy,” you say before kissing his cheek and leaving the room.

The next day you spent all afternoon getting ready. You were so excited for this that you couldn’t think straight. Nat and Wanda came in to help you pick out an outfit, and decide what your hair should look like. Around 5, you jumped in the shower and start prepping for the most amazing night of your life. You kept wondering if you should let him kiss you first, or if you should kiss him first. Maybe see what the moment brings. 5 minutes to 7, you sit on your bed, awaiting Bucky.

At 7:30, you text him to see if something held him up. No answer. At 8:30 you change into sweats, trying to hold back tears. Maybe there was an emergency mission he had to go on, and didn’t have time to tell you. Maybe he was on his way back to compound and traffic caused him to be late, and his cell phone died. Or, maybe he changed his mind and didn’t want to go out with you. That thought made the tears you had been holding in, finally come out.

You decide to head to the kitchen and grab water, before just going to bed. As you walk past the common room you see Bucky watching TV. You walk into the room, “Bucky?” you ask, walking up to him. “Is... where have you been? I have been trying to reach you,” you say. Bucky doesn’t even bother to look at you, “Uh, yea well I decided against the date,” he says with a shrug. You are taken aback by not only his words, but his causal demeanor on the subject.

“Oh, and you didn’t think to inform me? I was waiting for you for almost two hours. I had Nat and Wanda help me pick out an outfit. I...” you choke back a sob. “You embarrassed me by standing me up, and you don’t seem to give a shit.” you say, anger now forming. Bucky finally looks at you, and for the first time in the 2 years you have known him, his beautiful blue eyes are cold.

“Well, maybe Sam will give me the $100 for standing you up.” he says. Your eyebrows shoot up. “Are you fucking serious? You took a joke Sam said and assumed that I was going to stand you up!?” you shout. “You said yes! What was I supposed to think?” Bucky shouts back. At this point everyone else has made their way to the common room, hearing your argument.

“Well you obviously didn’t listen to the rest of the conversation, you fucking asshole! I... I thought you knew me better than that! I... I thought our friendship and feelings meant more to you. Fuck you Bucky! I can never trust you again.” you say before running from the room. Sam steps up shaking his head, “Dude! We were joking! She was never going to stand you up! I told her after that comment that I was happy for the both of you.” Sam said.

“Fuck! What did I do?!” Bucky yells at himself sitting down and putting his head in his hands. “Buck, go apologize. Now!” Steve says smacking Bucky upside the head. Bucky quickly ran to your room and knocked furiously on your door. “Y/N, please open the door! Please!” he shouted. You sit on your bed trying to keep your resolve that you cannot trust the man on the other side of the door.

“Y/N, I am so fucking sorry! I will spend the rest of my life making it up to you, please open the door!” he continued to yell. You sigh and walk to the door, “Bucky, please just go away. I can’t talk about this anymore today. I just... we can talk tomorrow.” you say in a shaky voice. Bucky leans his head against your door. “I... I know I messed up. I know you might now ever forgive me. But, I... I love you, Y/N. I love you so much.” he says before walking away.

You stand there in shock at the words you just heard. He loved you. You still hold your resolve and decide you will deal with everything tomorrow.

You woke up the next morning and see a beautiful bouquet of your favorite flowers on your nightstand. You can’t help the small smile at the sight of them. You sit up and rub the sleep out of your eyes. You decide to head out to the kitchen, knowing you would have to face this head on eventually. You open your door and see Bucky sitting against the wall on the opposite side of your door.

“Hey Doll.” he said sadly, looking up at you with bloodshot eyes. Your resolve breaks slightly seeing the man before you. “Buck, what are you doing out here?” you ask. He stands up and looks at you, “I was worried you would try and hide from me.” he says. You nod in understanding. “Look, Buck I understand that you are sorry, and I appreciate your millions of apologies, including the flowers, but how can I ever trust you to come and talk to me about things? You heard something, misinterpreted everything, and instead of asking me, you stood me up on purpose. I thought I meant more to you than that.” you say looking at the ground.

Bucky steps forward, “You do. Sweetheart, you mean more to me than anything. Hell, I would give up everything for you. I got in my head that I wasn’t good enough for you, and when I heard that I assumed you thought I the same. I.. I should have spoken with you, but I just thought I was doing you a favor. I.. I will regret it for the rest of my life because all I have ever wanted was you.” he says.

You lean in and brush your lips against his, lightly. “I love you too Buck. But, I am going to need some time before I am willing to give you a second chance. I.. I hope you understand.” you say. Bucky looks at you sadly, but nods. “I understand.” he says. You kiss him lightly again before walking away.

Taglist: @hailmary-yramliah @tuiccim @comedictragedy @cap-n-stuff @thefridgeismybestie @swiftmind @aleaisntcreative @lookiamtrying @pinknerdpanda @morganclaire4 @iamvalentinaconstanza @verygraphicink @im-squished @joannie95 @peace-love-hobbitness @connie326 @arundhati1609 @amandamdiehl

#Bucky Barnes #james buchanan barnes #james barnes #james bucky barnes #Bucky angst #bucky fanfic #bucky x reader #bucky barnes x reader

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subtlereferencetomyinterests · 4 years

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Communication Issues (AT:TTSIMBCMEOAYSFIL)- Chapter Three

Ao3, MasterPost, Chap.1, Chap.2

Relationships: Eventual Romantic Analogince, Romantic Prinxiety, implied background Moceit

Warnings: Misunderstandings, Miscommunication, Self-isolation, Arguments, Unintentional Emotional Repression, Body Horror (in the form of Remus being Remus!), swearing, some small descriptions of pain, self-deprecations. There’s some fluff in the middle cuz I’m not pure evil, but this is pretty angsty :3 (I promise it’ll have a happy ending u just gotta wait ok). Remus uses it/its here, and is also aromantic.

Word Count: 8,167

Now, dramatism isn’t one of your functions, so you like to think that you’re being entirely reasonable when you say that you’d rather die than inform your closest friends that you’ve grown to love them a bit more than platonically.

And yet, here they are. Sitting on your couch, in your cluttered room, staring up at you with expectation in their eyes. They’re waiting, Logan. You didn’t actually expect to avoid this forever, did you?

Maybe you did, but it wouldn’t be the first time you’ve been wrong.

But you digress: you owe them the explanation they came here for. And as you open your mouth to speak, your voice is not nearly as measured as you’d like it to be.

“As I said before, It was never my intention for you to think I did not want to see you- that is to say, it simply wasn’t feasible, given- well- there were certain complications, you see…”

Virgil narrows his eyes, bemusedly, from his contorted position across the arm and top cushion of your couch.

“What kind of complications?”

You look at the carpet, but it doesn’t offer much visual stimuli. You look up at the ceiling, but the angle makes your neck ache. You settle your eyes on your bookshelf instead, studying the multi-colored covers of novels that span the length of the entire opposite wall.

“...Complicated ones.”

Virgil snorts, a sound that usually has you thinking about just how adorable he can be, but the sound is devoid of humor in its current form.

“Care to elaborate, Teach?” Roman inquires, his legs folded comfortably under himself as he watches you. He’s managed to keep himself pretty still and quiet, though you aren’t sure if that’s attributed to his current restraint or the effects of your room.

You push your glasses up on your nose. They fall back to their original position. You repeat this action almost compulsively.

“It’s foolish- Very foolish. I know this is somewhat hypocritical of me, but I believe it is for the best that I do not burden you with it.”

“You aren’t a burden!” Roman squawks indignantly, in conjunction with Virgil snipping: “We’re well past that, buddy.”

You feel your face heat, embarrassingly enough. You aren’t sure why, but their instant and vehement defensiveness for you is a bit motivating. They… they won’t hate you for it. They might even understand, if you’re willing to be optimistic about this.

“You could call it. Jealousy, I suppose.”

“Jealousy?” Roman scrunches his nose, uncomprehending.

“Yes- I know it isn’t exactly fair of me to feel this way, but it’s the unfortunate truth. I have noticed that the two of you have become much… closer, than you once were,” you see the two of them flush in embarrassment, which only serves to prove your point. “Rest assured, I’m very happy for the both of you and your bond. It’s just that I’ve realized that I have become essentially irrelevant, which I find to be… upsetting. And I know you both are far too kind and non-communicative to outright tell me this, thus I decided that I would take matters into my own hands by giving the two of you your much-needed space willingly.”

You do not add that you’re also avoiding them because you can barely stomach being around their PDA. It seems unnecessary, and maybe a tad pathetic.

Virgil recovers from his embarrassment at your calling him out quickly enough, his abashment being engulfed by indignation. Oh, wonderful. They really can’t let up without a fight.

“What the hell are you talking about?” His anger is clear, but all three of you know that he’s only upset at the situation.

“I would love to remain as your friends, of course, I only meant that it would be best if I didn’t interrupt you two-”

“Interrupt us?!” He’s very near shouting, leaping up from his seat and stalking towards you. He stops less than a foot away, and you try desperately not to recoil from him.

“Yes,” you sound meek, don’t you? “It only made sense-”

He stares at you as though you’re an idiot. It’s a despicable look, but when you turn your attention to Roman for a reprieve, his expression is no different.

And then they- oh, what they do next brings you more pain than any expression ever could. It starts quiet, like they’re trying to hold it at bay, but their resolves crack and crumble.

They laugh. They’re laughing at you.

You shouldn’t have let them in- not into your room, not into your head, not into your life at all. You should have known that when your genuine emotions came to light, they’d only find it humorous in the end. Because you, Logan- Logic, your ‘feelings’- they’re hilarious. They are nonsensical and hardly befitting a being such as yourself, yet you have them! And you actually began to speak about them! What a comedic situation. You’re a fool in every sense of the word- both a jester and an idiot.

They aren’t even laughing that hard, but to you each small sound reads as a raucous, villainous cackle that tears apart your skin and leaves you raw. Roman’s head is tipped back and he appears to be shaking with amusement; Virgil is trying to press his lips together and stifle his chuckling, but he’s doing a poor job of it.

Something writhes in you, much uglier than your shame or guilt. It squirms beneath the layers of your skin and runs up and down your spine, tensing your muscles with its electricity. It’s fury, burning nearly as bright as your face surely must be with this humiliation.

How could they, tricking you into caring for them, convincing you to help them and support them, only to then heckle you when you hand them your trust. It was such a fragile thing already- which you know is preposterous, trust isn’t tangible, but in this moment it feels quite like a cracked window finally shattering to useless shards.

“Out.”

Virgil is startled into silence immediately; Roman makes a strangled sort of sound as he stops laughing.

“What?” They chorus, both looking ready to contradict you with drawn out and over-emotional arguments.

You won’t give them that satisfaction.

“Get. Out. Of my. Room,” your shaking speech is blanketed in monotone; it’s like a towel thrown over a forest fire; it won’t last long.

Their eyes widen comically. They speak all over each other, clamoring to explain or excuse their actions, but to you the pleading is naught but white noise.

You gave them a chance to leave of their own volition, but if they’re so keen on remaining a nuisance, then fine. You huff a sigh, turning your back to Roman and Virgil. With a snap, their chatter cuts off unceremoniously, and you are left cold and lonely.

When you turn around, they’re gone.

<<<???>>><<<???>>><<<???>>>

You don’t get a chance to react before you’re thrown upwards through the floor of your bedroom. You land in an unceremonious heap, half-on and half-off of your bed, losing your balance almost immediately and toppling to the floor. Rising up makes you dizzy enough as it is, but being forced away from somewhere makes you want to vomit.

You pull yourself up from the ground, holding your head in your hands until the world stops spinning. As soon as your brain gets working again, you can hear thunderous footfalls out in the hall. They stomp right past your door and down the hall. There’s a series of loud thumps, rattles, and shouts, before whoever it is retraces their steps.

You walk to your door as if on autopilot, opening it just as Roman was about to knock. He’s panting, distressed.

“We fucked up,” he says.

“Yeah,” you pull him inside, slamming the door behind him, “We did.”

“I didn’t mean to, you know that right? I wasn’t laughing at him, I wouldn’t, alright?” Roman spirals, “He thinks I did! It was just ridiculous, was all! To think that we don’t want him around- to think-”

He curls into himself. You catch his hand before he can press it against his chest, unfolding him. You hold his wrist and rub little patterns into the back of his hand.

“Ro, hey.”

He glances up at you, wild-eyed. Eyeshadow is already creeping its way down his face.

“Why don’t we talk about this in your room instead, hm?”

He nods, shaking, with a small mutter of ‘right, right’. You nod back, holding onto him just tight enough that your claws don’t quite dig in.

You materialize in Roman’s room, dragging him along with you. Almost immediately a fierce pulse of energy overwhelms you. You stagger in shock, but Roman doesn’t even blink at the force. He pulls away from you and falls upon his massive, plush, circular canopy bed with a despairing whine. You can’t really blame him.

The Creative power of this room takes its effects on you faster than any other side’s abilities could- you really wonder how Roman is so used to it. You sit on the bed beside him, intending to comfort him as he buries himself further into his hoard of pillows. But then, you can’t. You can’t sit down. Far too much troubled excitement is pooling in your stomach; far too many ideas and thoughts are running through your head, and the loudest of them are desperate appeals to start fixing this mess.

Anxiety and Creativity wouldn’t theoretically mix well, but that’s just the thing about theories. They’re often wrong, so very wrong or crackpot or conspiratorial. The truth of it is Creativity and Anxiety work together wonderfully, both as concepts and as actual, metaphysical creatures. You’ve known this, even if you won’t admit it, since you were all teenagers. But only now does it hit you just how much Roman’s abilities can do for you. It takes all of your energy, all that pent-up fear and frustration from what’s just happened, and it gives you the tools to actually use it for something.

It also makes you, ya know. Just a little recklessly confident.

“Alright, Princey, get up.”

He whines again, shifting his head just enough to glare at you.

“I’m wallowing in self-pity! For the reason that one of my dearest friends thinks me a- a bully! How are you not freaking out about this?”

“Honestly?” You wrap your hands around his wrist again, pulling him into a ragdoll-ish sitting position, “I’ve got no idea. Mentally I think I’m in the fifth dimension or some shit, so we gotta work this out quick before I come back down and really lose my mind.”

He grumbles, but you see him biting back an amused smile. Flopping his legs over the edge of the bed and making no movement to stand, Roman narrows his eyes up at you.

“Alright, alright. We need to give that conversation another go, I know that, but we should give Logan some space first. He’s unlikely to hear us out now. You know how headstrong he is when he gets… like this.”

You nod, vacantly, because you're already three steps ahead of where he is in the conversation.

“Yeah, good point. More time.”

“Right,” Roman draws the word out, looking at you strangely, “So why aren’t you moping with me?”

You pull the reins of your practically palpable energy enough to sit down, right next to him.

“We obviously have to work out this-” you gesture between yourself and Roman, “-before we can really talk to Logan,” once the sentence is out of your mouth you wish you could swallow back the ‘obviously’, because Roman is usually slow on the uptake and you’d never intentionally make fun of that. But he does nothing more than scrunch his face up in exaggerated confusion, the pink tint to his face giving away that he must have at least some idea what you’re implying.

“What- what do you mean by that? The two of us already get along famously!”

“I think you know that’s not what I meant. You’re using your stage voice. You always do that when you lie.”

“Who are you- Janus?” He cough-laughs awkwardly, breaking eye-contact with you. You’re surprised that you’re holding up any better than him, but your strongest reaction at the moment is a mild blush and some prickling at your skin.

It is for these reasons that you both love and hate Creative-Mode Virgil. He is a very productive and efficient version of you, but his propensity for acting bold and impulsive makes you want to strangle him. Him being you, of course.

“Look, Logan was wrong to think that he was a third wheel, or whatever, but I’m pretty sure he was right about the… closeness with us, I guess.”

Roman’s staring at you with wide eyes, a deep red flushing him from his ears right across his nose and cheeks. He’s clearly trying to smile, but it’s coming out awkwardly strained, almost twisted sideways. There’s a second when the anxiety rushes back to you in a wave of oh no you misread this so fucking bad of course he doesn’t feel that way about you you’re his best friend whatthehellwereyouthinkingVirgil- and it almost wins you over, but you’re in Roman’s Room. And that doesn’t just mean motivation and creativity.

Your paranoid thoughts could never beat what’s ingrained into you as a fact. You can feel the romantic tension, almost like it’s a physical presence in the room. Maybe it is. A part of you- most of you, in fact- still wants to convince you that you’re doing something wrong. But it’s getting harder and harder to believe the longer you sit here, knowing that these emotions you feel aren't entirely your own.

“Virgil,” he breathes, and you can feel it on your skin- when did you get so close?

“We don’t have to do anything about this,” you start to backpedal, but you don’t move away from him, “Not if you don’t want to, yet. I just… we had to talk about it, I think.”

“So you…?”

The hesitance in his voice destroys your resolve. You reach out, tucking up both of his hands in your own.

They’re warm.

“Yeah, I- yeah.”

He surveys you for far too long; it’s hard not to squirm. You let him watch you, though, just so he can find whatever it is he’s looking for in your expression. When he does, it only draws him in nearer.

“You and Logan are right. I love you, V.”

You try not to smile. It doesn’t work.

“I figured.”

He huffs at you, shoving you, but he’s grinning widely. You roll your eyes at him. You don’t speak for a while, holding your tongue for as long as you can- but you really need to say it. Just so he knows.

“I love you back, though. Or- something like that, I don’t know…”

Roman laughs outright at that, tossing his head back. You can already feel the energy you were given twisting into an entirely contradictory exhaustion. Because of that, you don’t even try to pretend to be annoyed; you just watch, fondly.

When he’s settled, that amused look turns sharply to worry.

“So now what?”

You pause, running your thumb over his knuckles as you think the question over.

“Logan?”

“Yeah, that.”

“Well, like you said, we give him some space.”

“And then?”

You glance up at Roman for confirmation, but you don’t need to. Like you said, you can feel it; his room is a pretty big snitch.

“We tell him we love him.”

You let yourself forget about what happened, just for the afternoon. It’s hard, but what choice do you have? It’s out of your hands for now. And, while usually that makes you even more nervous, you manage to force yourself into the shape of something vaguely undaunted. After all, if you can’t tell Logan just how much you care about him, you can still remind Roman.

In your own way, of course.

“Hey,” you mutter, for what must be the millionth time that evening. Roman turns his attention away from the vent-art he’s working on, glancing at you.

“Yes, Knightmare?” He asks, but the tired and affectionate smile on his face says that he already knows your game. Damn, and here you were thinking you were subtle. (not.)

“Mmh,” you press your face into the side of his neck, leaving a few miniscule kisses to the skin there. Your arms are twined around his waist, a position that bordered on- oh, who are you kidding, it’s exceptionally clingy.

The embarrassment that you feel from so openly displaying such sappy, disgusting affection is overturned, however slightly, by the quiet laugh and kiss to the top of your head that Roman returns to you for your efforts. You hide your smile in the crook of his neck.

You continue to shower Roman with attention for a minute or so, covering his face with little pecks and pressing yourself against him, before leaning back a few inches. You sigh. He resumes his work, resting his back against your chest as he does so.

You will let him continue to draw for ten or so minutes. You will ask for his attention again, and he’ll give it to you with a slightly wider smile than the last time you did it- that smile grows exponentially, but only by tiny increments.

You’ll kiss him all up his neck and the side of his face, hug him even tighter, listening to him laugh in a much too relieved voice before you let up once more.

And he’ll be a little more sure of you each time. A little more sure that you two can do this together.

<<<???>>><<<???>>><<<???>>>

You are not a patient entity when it comes to the things you want. You are, in the best of cases, the exact opposite. This gets about One Million Billion times worse when the one thing that you want is to declare your love for someone, and said someone hasn’t left his room even once in six days.

Virgil, Patton, and Janus (once you’d relayed the situation to the latter two) have essentially been keeping you on a leash at all times of the day- or night- to make absolutely sure that you don’t break Logan’s door down. Which- to be fair- you wouldn’t put it past yourself to do that, but still.

But even with the distraction of a new boyfriend (boyfriend!!!!) and those two overbearingly caring friends of yours, you are still Physically Unable to Not Do Anything currently. And, you suppose if you can’t break Logan’s door down, you might as well try that idea out on someone who wouldn’t bat an eye at such an, ah, intrusion seems to be the fitting word.

“Uurghhhhh!”

You drop yourself face first onto Remus’ bed in your usual melodramatic fashion, immediately regretting it because fuck that smells horrid. When was the last time it washed its sheets?

Probably never, actually. You sit up.

Your sibling is sitting cross-legged on its desk, working on something that’s got a good deal of goop and limbs. It looks up at you blankly.

“Ro? What the hell are you doing in here?” It doesn’t sound angry, just very, very surprised.

“My life is ending.”

“Fun! Does that mean I get full creative control?”

“No! And it’s not fun, you animal!”

It scrutinizes you, setting its strange arthropodic creation down on the desk. You lean back when it leans forwards.

“Wow, shit must be really bad if you’ve decided to come here!”

You nod, miserably.

“Okay,” it claps its hands together, standing up only to fall against the bed beside you. It’s half-sitting, half-laying; the way it twists all its limbs up can not be comfortable. “What’s going on?”

You glare at it, but you aren’t sure why. Probably just because it is there and you need something to glare at while you talk.

“It’s Logan…” You trail off, waiting for Remus to catch on. It takes its time thinking, even more expressionless than before.

“You know why he hasn’t left his room in days? I tried to check on him but he barely told me anything. Just said he was tired, and ‘thanks for the concern’,” it says at last, catching you off-guard.

“You mean you haven’t heard? I would’ve thought Patton or Janus might have told you.”

It taps its claw to its chin a couple of times, thoughtful. The implication clicks just a second later, apparently, because it lets out a whining groan and drags its hands down its face.

“Oh, not that. I can’t do anything if it’s that!” It exclaims, “Yeah, they did mention it, but I guess I just tune that kind of thing out,” it pauses, “...It’s because you and Vee are fucking now, right?”

You flush, embarrassment and indignation welling up at the back of your throat. You bat Remus’ shoulder, bristly as a thornbush.

“No, we aren’t- I mean, not yet- I mean, that’s none of your business!”

“You did kinda come to me for help, though, so it actually is.”

You glower, refusing to justify that with a response. It rolls its eyes at you, turning over so that it’s flat on its back with its upper half hanging off the bed.

“It’s your bad to come to me for romance advice. You couldn’t have asked literally anyone else- yourself, for example?” It fusses with its talons as it rants, snapping off a couple of nails absentmindedly, “It’s not even the fun kind of gross.”

You can’t believe you’re considering saying it. You won’t! You shouldn’t! You refuse!

“...Please?” Oh fuck, you’ve done it now.

Remus pulls its head up slightly, a very smug grin across its face. Its teeth are horrendously crooked and yellow-stained, looking much too big and sharp to fit into its mouth.

“Awww, you’re begging? God, you’re so desperate.”

It’s very difficult to resist the urge to push it off the bed. But you are a pillar of restraint today, because it’s not entirely wrong about that, and you still need it to help you.

“Look, it’s too personal to my own life for my abilities to do me any good. And Virgil can’t talk about it- he’s way too frazzled to even think about it, the poor thing. Plus, Patton and Janus aren’t… great… at things,” that’s a very soft way of putting: the former gets much too emotionally invested and the latter is entirely snarky and unhelpful. “So I came here. I think a more, erm, detached point of view could help.”

Remus hums at that.

“I guess there’s nothing more detached from romantic issues than someone who’s never had any- you’ve come to the right place in that case.”

“So you’ll help?”

Remus slides slowly forward until it’s landing in a heap on the ground, various crunching noises resulting from the impact. It huffs, lifts itself up to rest its chin on the edge of the bed, and stares at you unblinkingly.

“You’re not allowed to tangent about how pretty his eyes are or how much you love his voice, or anything like that, got it? Otherwise, I will puke, and probably into your mouth just to shut you up.”

You gag, perhaps a bit exaggeratedly.

“That’s vile!”

“Thank you! Now, bitch to me about your problems before I get bored.”

You look down to your lap, winding and unwinding your fingers repetitiously. You think about the past couple of days; in many aspects, it’s been wonderful. Virgil actually wants to be your boyfriend! And that’s what he is now! Of course, you both are just as cuddly as ever, but now you don’t have to worry about holding back. That’s been an amazing relief.

But there’s always that little thing missing, holding you back from being content completely. You want to give Logan his space, truly you do, but every day you feel a little more distant from him. A little further from being able to fix things. It’s familiar in all the worst ways.

You blink rapidly, remembering where you are before the emotions overcome you. With a shaky breath, you begin to speak. It’s just a summary at first, but then you can’t help but give Remus your most detailed accounts of, well, everything.

You gauge its reaction intensely, but it’s as inscrutable as ever. You finish the tale hurriedly, expectant for some sort of response from the creature across from you.

There is an intolerable silence as you practically see the gears turning in Remus’ brain, which is funny because you thought Octopuses were supposed to have nine of them. You have no idea what it’s using all the other ones for, if that’s the case.

“You laughed at him,” it smirks when it speaks, sounding out the words slowly. You scoff.

“We were laughing at the situation! We didn’t mean it to seem that way. It was just bad timing! ”

It cackles at you, sitting back on its legs and tossing its head back. It sounds like a shrieking kettle.

“No wonder he’s so pissed! He thinks you think his feelings are a joke! His whole deal is not wanting to be that. That’s, like, his big thing.”

You’d… sort of figured that’s what happened, but hearing it out loud still stings. To think you’d done that to him. He was getting so much better with his feelings, but you had to go and ruin it.

“I already know that I- we-” mental filtering, Roman, “We caused the issue. I wanted to know how to fix it.”

Remus stops laughing as suddenly as it’d started, looking at you with all the sincerity of, perhaps, someone capable of being serious.

“Corner him,” it answers simply.

“Excuse me?”

“Corner him. Your first mistake was that you went to him in his room, which meant he could just throw you out of there. He’s stubborn, right? Plus, he thinks you were making fun of him. He’s not gonna come out to have a civilized conversation on his own, cuz he’s a dumbass, so I don’t think more space is gonna help you out here. Lure him out! Tie him up, if it’ll make him listen!” Remus pauses thoughtfully, “Orrrrr you could try amputating his legs entirely, but he’ll probably grow them back. He’s annoying like that.”

You choose to ignore the last suggestion, focusing instead on its main point.

“Are you sure that won’t make things worse?”

“Define ‘worse’ for me, in terms of right now, currently, in here on this day.”

“Good point.”

Remus nods to itself, standing up from the floor and stretching its arms above its head. Its shoulders dislocate, but it pops them back into their sockets once its done. This almost feels like the conclusion of the conversation, but you get the impression that it’s taking its time to piece together a sentence with a little more finality.

“He was obviously crazy about you two before, which means he probably still is. He’s also a sad little shit, though.”

You move to stand as well, curling your fingers against themselves again.

“You really think so?”

“Oh, I have no idea. That’s your department, remember? Now, get out of my room; no alloromantics allowed after-” it checks the time, clearly making the rule up on the spot, “Five twenty-six P.M.”

“Fine, fine, I can take a hint,” you place your hands on your hips, feeling just a little more confident in the wake of this talk.

“‘Hint’? I explicitly told you to leave.”

You grumble at Remus, but make your way to the door nonetheless. It turns back to its desk, grabbing for a jar that seems to be filled with insect legs. It’s immediately refocused into whatever strange creatures it was working on, pulling them apart and shoving them back together. You let the affronted look fall from your face, replaced by a small, fond smile.

“Thanks, Re.”

It glances back at you, briefly.

“Yeah, yeah, it’s nothing…” it pauses, its hands stilling. “Good luck.”

“Thank you,” you say, earnestly.

You leave, letting it get back to its work.

The hallway smells like a fucking Macy’s compared to Remus’ room. Jesus Christ, it’s a relief.

You shut the door behind you with a soft click, leaning back against it with a deep, shuddering sigh. It’s been a long week.

Ah, and just on time, as if to prove your point, there’s a gravelly shout and a thump from downstairs. You draw yourself to attention, shaking the slump from your shoulders. You flit through the narrow hall to the top of the stairs, listening carefully for an issue to resolve or an unseemly beast to slay. A prince must protect his subjects, after all.

For a few seconds, all you can hear below is frantic whispering. You set a foot on the top step, but you don’t get the chance to descend.

Virgil is there like a flash of lightning, speeding up the stairs and heading right for you.

You startle, spiraling back to escape his path, but it’s futile. He catches you at the top, sending you both crashing into the opposite wall. Pain shoots up your back at the impact, as well as sparking in your shoulders where his claws are gripping you. You hiss, the sound dying when you meet his eyes.

They’re bright. No, glowing. No, seeping- their color is seeping into the world around them, curling in little streaks of murky green and violet around Virgil’s face.

He speaks, but it’s without distortion. It’s clear and crisp. It isn’t quite anxiety that’s consuming him this way, no, it’s something much more powerful.

“Roman,” he takes your hand in a fervent grip, “Ro, it’s Logan.”

You blink, and before you really know what you’re doing, you're already halfway downstairs.

<<<???>>><<<???>>><<<???>>

Light, sparse taps are turned out against the solid wood door. The sounds, however small, echo throughout this packed little room.

Your fingers stall above the laptop’s keyboard, and for a fraction of a second frustration overcomes you. It’s gone as soon as it comes, replaced unceremoniously by numbness. This is a minor inconvenience to your work, but not much else. Thankfully, you are not one to dwell on it; after all this time, you are finally in complete control of your faculties and your emotions.

The knock returns, more sure of itself as it hits against the surface. Bemusedly, you wonder why on earth they’re still bothering- but, that isn’t them, it belatedly occurs to you. The rhythm isn’t that of some showtune or another, nor is it harsh and pounding.

You aren’t sure how many days it’s been since you’ve heard that particular sound. You aren’t sure… What day is it?

Well, regardless, you’ve been jarred from your work. You could ignore it and continue on- you’d likely forget it soon enough- but the fact that you recognize the presence specifically as Patton stops that idea in its tracks. He’s sensitive, an overthinker to an extreme degree. He could entirely misconstrue it as a dislike of his company if you were to not respond, unlike a flippant Remus or a collected Janus. And, well…

You’re over it. You’ve been over what Roman and Virgil did to you. But even though you very much are, it’s still perfectly reasonable to not want to be near them. There would be nothing to gain from talking to them, and you’d like to spare yourself the headache. But, you digress; Patton was not a part of what transpired. He would not do that to you, and therefore he is not an impediment to your work. Looking at it rationally, he is in fact a great source of comfo- help, for you.

With this in mind you stand, making your way across the room. You stagger when you walk, like something’s pulling you in different directions. Odd. The feeling is somewhere in your head, sinking down your vertebrae, insisting that you need to remain in the sanctity of your room. If you leave, the pull suggests, then all your carefully built clarity of mind should become disrupted. How strange for such a convincing conviction to be so seemingly baseless, you reflect.

The knock returns, and that is of course a much more pressing issue. There’s a pull coming from there as well, only one much fiercer and easier to place. It’s the strongest thing you’ve experienced in some time, like someone’s arm around your waist, guiding you forwards (even if there isn’t anyone there, really).

“Good afternoon,” you intone, drawing the door open with excessive force. Strange, again; maybe you had just forgotten how heavy it was.

Patton stands across from you, shock written across his features with his fist still poised in the air, as though to knock again. He drops the hand quickly, reaching out instead with both arms while a grin consumes his face. But the limbs spasm concerningly, and stop. He sweeps his arms back and presses his balled hands tightly against his chest, still smiling at you, only a little more strained. His eyes are big, murky pools of color and emotion, raging and contradictory and impossible to make sense of. Even looking into them is overwhelming.

“Hi, buddy,” he says it so quietly, but the actual words don’t matter. He says it with force, like perhaps he’s localized every emotion he’s ever felt entirely into his tone of voice.

You blink at him, an undefined question on your lips before that pull behind you turns into a sharp push, and before you know it you’re slumping forward into the hallway and out of your room. As you’re forced out, you narrowly avoid hitting the carpet. That’s thanks to Patton, who rushes forwards with a yelp, hauling you up into his sturdy arms with very little effort.

The confusion you’d felt leaves you in a great big rush, replaced by fire. Your skin is consumed by burns at your friend’s touch- or at least it feels that way, but logically it cannot possibly be actual flame- but fuck logic because you’re on fucking fire.

It’s an all-consuming heat, but that’s hardly all it is. It’s breathing. Like you’d been holding your breath to the point of mad deliria and only now are you gasping in great, relieved breaths of clear air as some great and stifling weight is lifted from your lungs. It also feels like moving from an ice bath to a sauna all too quickly, giving you the greatest relief in conjunction with horrific pain.

Oh. You’re crying.

“Shh,” Patton whispers, as though this isn’t anything out of the ordinary, “It’s okay, it’s alright.”

You hold onto him hesitantly. Are you sitting? You think you must be, judging from this position.

“Do you need me to let go? Is it too much?”

You open your mouth to speak, and your voice is in perfect, frightening monotone.

“Yes, please.”

Patton draws back gently, just far enough so that you’re not touching. Big, crocodile tears crawl down your face still, but they begin to die down after a moment. You get your breathing under control, even if just barely.

“I didn’t want you to fall and get hurt,” Patton explains, “But I realize that making you touch a living vessel for emotion might’ve hurt, too, after- well, after that,” he gestures vaguely to your room, and then to yourself. You tilt your head in confusion.

“What-?” You look down at your arms, and the question dies on your lips.

It’s lifeless; corpse-like. The cold, slate-gray painted up your arms and probably across your whole body. The color looks sucked out of you, leaving only emptiness in its wake. The only sign that you’re a living being and not a husk, a shell, a piece of shed skin- other than the tremble of your frame- is the shocks of electric blue running up your body. They could be veins, if not for the fact that the lines were perfectly straight and geometrically cornered.

Patton reaches out, pensively, and presses a cautious finger against the back of your hand. At his touch, the spot bursts into life like watercolor on wet paper. Lively, peachy skin with cool undertones appears, before fading back to gray as Patton removes his finger. And it stings.

You jump to your feet with a struggle, hardly registering when Patton follows your lead. You spin on your heel, staring through the open door and into your room. You can’t imagine entering it- just the feeling of being near it shortens your breath. It’s frigid, it’s hard and unshakeable and dark. It is completely and entirely devoid of emotion or life, and you hadn’t left that frozen hellscape in days.

It’s a wonder you can feel anything at all, after what you’ve done to yourself.

A shaking gasp rips out of your throat, and before you can think another panicked thought you jolt forward and wrench the door shut. You back away from it until your back hits the opposite wall.

“I- I didn’t realize I was doing it,” your words sound like pleas, falling from your mouth without your consent.

“I know,” Patton stands beside you, close enough to feel but not to burn.

“I didn’t mean to, I just-”

“I know.”

“I was doing better. I was doing so well, I was happy.”

He nods solemnly.

You’ve been aware of the existence of your emotions, and relatively accepting of it, for a good deal of time. Hypocrisy is unsustainable. You can’t very well preach the negatives of repression on a weekly basis and then go on to practice it indefinitely.

But what you are… everything that you encompass, everything that encompasses you, it makes it much too easy to slip up. To force out every pesky feeling in favor of more ‘important’ things. What it really is is a pitiful defense mechanism, unfortunately built deep into you by the purpose of your being. And it seems that your room can even do it without your knowledge.

“Logan?”

You look up, unsure if he can even see how miserable you are. Can you emote anymore? You try to frown, but your muscles are stuck like plastic.

“Why don’t we get you somewhere else and see if we can get some of the feeling back into ya, okay?”

You adjust your glasses once, then twice.

“Not your room, I would hope?”

“Oh, goodness,” he lets out a startled laugh, “Of course not, that would be way too much! I was thinking somewhere a little more, uhm, neutral?”

You perk up at that implication. You could just go to the common room, of course, but that’s hardly the only unaffected area in the Mindpalace. Your world isn’t quite real- and even if it is it’s extremely fluid and easy to influence- meaning you can make about just as many locations as any of you would like. Which includes structures ‘outside’ of your ‘house’.

An ill-defined existence like that might irk you, if you were in a philosophical mood. Thankfully, the only mood you’re in right now is sad.

“Yes, I think a change of setting could be beneficial.”

Patton chirps happily, much like a tree frog, and makes to lead you downstairs. You follow close behind him, chasing that emotional high but still nervous of the pain that it could cause you.

You’re on edge for reasons enough already. The idea that you could run into them is a prominent one that you’d rather not focus on.

For a split second you think you might have to, though, because there’s someone sitting on the couch when you step down from the landing. Your breath catches in your throat, but then he looks up at you, heterochromic eyes wide with surprise, and you exhale steadily.

“Hello, Janus.”

His eyebrows arch up at your greeting, perplexion in his smile. Appraisingly, he observes you, offering only a small wave. He addresses Patton when he speaks.

“Well, Dear, it seems you were right to be concerned about him.”

Patton mutters something that you can’t quite make out, looking disconcerted.

You’d be flushing indignantly, if you had the ability to. Your shoulders hunch up as you glance between your friends.

“You’ve been talking about me?”

They both look acutely uncomfortable, exchanging looks. That’s answer enough for you, though.

Oh, just look at yourself. You’re a spectacle now, aren’t you? Poor Logan, getting his metaphorical metaphysical heart broken, only for it to become the talk of the MindPalace for days on end as he relapses into repression. Isn’t it such a lovely thing for you to be? A piece of gossip. Entertainment.

Janus’ worry grows on his face, and soon he’s up from his spot and hastening towards you. You step back from him, trying to remember what glaring is meant to look like. He doesn’t invade your space again, but he just… stares at you.

“Would you like to talk about it?” He asks. You can almost laugh at the question.

“I’m sure you already know all about it, though, don’t you?”

Both of them are taken aback by your snapping. You regret it immediately; they haven’t done anything wrong, not really. They’re trying to help you, it isn’t their fault that they got caught up in your ‘tragic tale’. But your frustration is difficult to push down. You get the feeling that you can’t push anything down, without worrying that something will snap; it’s almost like an overworked muscle.

“Whatever you think has been happening out here,” Janus speaks, even and slow, “It’s not that bad, alright?”

Patton nods along with him, and reaches towards you. He falters, eventually opting to hook a finger through the band of your watch instead. Your skin prickles, but there’s no pain.

“C’mon, I was thinking we could try heading to the Clubhouse.”

That settles your anger, microscopically. You think Janus is being truthful, and Patton is nothing but consoling. And, of course, there’s the clubhouse…

You might not ever admit how much you like it. It’s been around since before you were around, back in the days of just Anxiety (the oldest), Creativities (tied for second), and a very newly formed Morality. Back when it was first made, it really was just a little child’s clubhouse, made primarily by Roman, with some disruptions by Remus, and small additions by a tiny Patton. It was probably the first neutral structure made up by the sides, as they had just begun to figure out their powers and the ‘world’ that they inhabited. Of course no one had the heart to get rid of it after that.

You give Patton a nod, angling your face so that it maybe looks like you’re smiling. He lets go of you, smiling back as he turns on his heel and heads for the door. You trail behind him, knowing that it must look very silly that you’re basically tailgating him. Janus follows you in turn, a few feet behind. He watches over the both of you protectively.

You step out onto the lawn, hearing grass crunch beneath your shoes. The wind is particularly biting, and the sky above threatens a storm. You’re sure that the weather in the real world isn’t this chaotic, so someone in the mindscape must be sulking. You don’t mind; it’ll only make the warmth of the Clubhouse all the more pleasant.

The Clubhouse has changed so much over the years that it’s unrecognizable as its original iteration. What once was a little stick-and-stone glorified fairy house is now a cottage-like building, one story high with a thickly thatched roof. Beside the door on either side are big bay windows, each made into little reading nooks. It’s essentially one big room, the outside painted with such vibrant pastels that it easily stands out against its surroundings.

The doors creak when Patton opens them, but not in a way that denotes damage or wear. It’s an old and comforting sound, one that comes from familiarity and consistent use. You step through the threshold, and affection floods your chest.

It isn’t large, but it’s well-equipped. There are ancient oaken tables stacked up with crafts materials, squashy bean bag chairs, and a bright rug or two thrown over the rustic hardwood floors. The nooks have pillows and blankets piled in them, looking like nests. There are bookshelves, art supplies, vinyl records (complete with a record player)- even some new-looking wall displays of preserved bugs and butterflies for decoration. To top it all off, fairy lights were strung across all the walls, making it all seem quite mystic.

You find yourself taking another step inwards; the amenities are incredibly inviting. Everything here is inviting, and homey, and lived-in. The house itself almost feels alive, nonsensical as that is.

It’s no wonder this is everyone’s favorite.

Patton watches you patiently, his hand resting on the door handle. You take a deep breath, but you aren’t sure why you need it. You make your way to the perfume-y, floral print sofa against the wall to your right, treating everything around you rather reverently. When you sit, you sink down into the couch.

Patton sits a respectful distance from you. Janus strolls right after him, knocking the door shut with the back of his boot before settling in an armchair on the left of the couch.

There’s a comfortable silence, and you start to feel your numbness abate. With a contented sigh, your head falls back against the cushion and your eyes fall shut. Not in an effort to sleep. You’re just… resting. You breathe deeply, letting the atmosphere envelop you.

The corners of your mouth twitch up.

“Logan!” Patton squeaks, “Look!”

Your eyes blink open, mildly startled at the outburst. Patton’s gaze on you is intense, first focused on your face and then moving down your arms. You follow the look, to see your...

Your perfectly normal, flesh-colored arms. Your human-ish, mildly tan, average arms. You feel what you can now recognize as a smile grow wider on your face.

“Well,” Janus chimes, “It seems you just needed a little break.”

“Maybe so,” your voice creaks from lack of use. You hadn’t even realized you’d been nonverbal since you’d last snapped at them. Neither had drawn attention to it, which you silently thank them for (they, after all, were all too familiar with the experience).

“Do you feel good enough to talk about what’s been upsetting you?” Patton gently asks you. And you… don’t have an answer.

“What is there to talk about?” You tilt your head bemusedly.

“I think he means, are you ready to talk to who’s been upsetting you?” Janus explains. Patton hesitates before nodding his agreement.

“I- what?” Your serenity leaves in a rush, replaced by astonishment and outrage, “You expect me to- to talk to them?”

You give them approximately three seconds to respond before plowing forwards with your rant.

“I’m talking to you both, isn’t that enough? You’ve done nothing to wrong me, of course. What does it matter if I don’t speak to those- those- those-”

Janus’ eyes expand to circles, the pupils shrinking to anxious slits.

“Those?” He prompts.

“Tricksters, betrayers, playactors, wolves- whatever you want to call them!” Where were vocab cards when you needed them? All your synonyms can’t carry the punch that you need them to. Insults aren’t much good if you have to explain them after.

“No!” Patton practically screams, out of absolutely nowhere. You glance at him, stunned, to see him looking like a kicked puppy- er, froggy. He’s on the verge of tears, leaning towards you precariously, with devastation swirling in his big eyes. “This is why you need to talk to them, please, Logan.”

You are so very bewildered, you barely notice that Janus is standing from his chair until he’s already across the room.

“As I said earlier: whatever you think happened, didn't. I can prove it, too,” he mutters, standing by the door.

“You weren't there, Janus,” you snap, "I tried to tell them how I felt and they- they laughed at me.”

“They didn't!” Patton squeaks. You shake your head frantically, still reeling.

“It was- it was awful, you can’t-”

“No,” Patton interrupts, “I meant that literally. They didn’t do that.”

This interaction is making your head spin with indignation. You are capable of immense patience when it comes to Patton- and Janus, for that matter- but this has become ridiculous.

“I’m so tired of being made a mockery of, Patton. I won’t stand for it any longer, even if you’re just trying to help.”

He breathes in sharply, about to argue, but then his gaze catches on something behind you. His mouth stays open, but he’s soundless. You jump to your feet, spinning around to see just what he’s looking at.

The door is open. Janus is gone.

There's a shout from the main house.

Taglist: @shrimp-crockpot @glitter-skeleton-uwu @intruxiety @thefivecalls

(Lemme know if you wanna be added or removed :3)

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ranma-rewatch · 3 years

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Episode 21: This Ol' Gal's the Leader of the Amazon Tribe!

*checks watch* Oh, hey, it’s time for more Ranma 1/2! Hope things are going well for you, person reading this. I’m...fairly sure I know what’s coming? I just don’t really remember exactly how it happens. Will I like it? Will I not? We’ll have to see, next paragraph, after I’ve seen the episode again.

That was...not what I was expecting? This storyline is both moving much faster and much slower than I remember, if that makes any sense. How? Well, let me recap it a bit first.

The episode starts with someone flying into the city on birds. More specifically, a bunch of small birds supporting a larger bird who doesn’t seem to fly, and the person is riding on that bird. It’s weird. She arrives in a construction zone, an old woman with a walking stick taller than she is, and she says something about looking for her son-in-law. Actually, she says it a lot. A steel girder almost falls on her head, but she hits it with her stick in mid-air, shattering the metal into dust, before running off.

It cut from that to Ryoga attacking Ranma. Why? Well, Ryoga doesn’t really need a reason, but this time he does. Namely, the whole Ranma kissing Akane thing from the last episode. Of course, Ranma was in cat-mode at the time and doesn’t remember it at all, no matter how much Ryoga tells him it’s real. After Ryoga gets splashed with cold water, Ranma is then attacked by Sasuke and Kuno for the same reason, and combined with piglet-form Ryoga’s help, Ranma actually gets kinda beat up in the process.

Heading back to the home, he realizes that Akane’s probably mad if it is true, and we see her in the dojo, but she isn’t really working out the way she usually does when she’s mad. If anything, Akane seems conflicted. Ranma shows up to talk about it with her, and immediately apologizes. Akane asks if he remembers doing it, and he admits he doesn’t. Then, Akane wonders, did it not matter? Would Ranma have kissed anyone, and it just happened to be her?

Not understanding what is going on, Ranma stumbles over answering too long, until Akane starts actually getting riled up, calling him a flirt. That pisses Ranma off, so they get into an argument. There’s also a scene where their dads are playing shogi, and they wonder about that pink cat Shampoo sent them, especially since it’s unlikely she knew about Ranma’s fear of felines.

The answer to that comes as Ranma goes to take a nice, hot bath to clean off after the fights he’s had. The cat jumps in with him, and before he can freak out about his greatest fear being in the room, Shampoo emerges from the bath right where the cat had been, and she’s very naked. Yep, the cat was her that whole time!

In a case of Ultimate Bad Timing, Akane comes to take a bath herself and sees Ranma in the bath with a naked Shampoo. We cut directly from that to Ranma practicing what to tell Akane later. Namely, that he won’t apologize or back down, instead being firm on the fact that it wasn’t what it looked like and he did nothing wrong. And we wonder why Ranma has relationship problems.

Akane appears, and she seems fine...before knocking Ranma into a pond. Not long after the water changes him into his cursed form, the old lady from the beginning appears, and Ranma has a very hard time fighting her. She won’t explain who she is or why she’s fighting him, then disappears. That felt...a bit pointless, honestly.

Later, Shampoo comes by the house again, with food. It seems she has moved to Japan officially, and lives and works at a nearby ramen shop. As everyone’s eating the food, the old woman shows up again, taking a place at the table to eat. It’s revealed that she is Shampoo’s great-grandmother, named Cologne, and she’s there to make sure that Shampoo and Ranma get married. Soun fires back about the engagement Ranma already has to Akane, but Shampoo seems to think she has a good argument for why she should be the one to take Ranma’s hand.

She takes him into the bathroom and uses cold water to turn back into a cat, and it’s revealed exactly what happened. Heading back to China, she was shamed for failing to either kill or marry Ranma, and thus had to train with Cologne. They did that at Jusenkyo, for some reason, and Shampoo fell into the Spring of Drowned Cats. So, apparently the curse is Ranma’s fault, and thus he has to marry her. He rightfully points out that’s utter nonsense, but Cologne doesn’t care.

They fight for a bit, with Cologne showing off one of those moves where it looks like there are a bunch of her but only one is real. Ranma uses food and Cologne’s hunger to figure out the real one, but that doesn’t really matter. She’s a bit impressed by him, but still knows he’s far too inexperienced to ever really stand a chance against her. Then she hits him with her stick, and says something about how he’ll be begging to marry Shampoo in a few days.

Why is that? Well, it seems she did something quite diabolical. She apparently hit a pressure point that has caused Ranma to be incredibly sensitive to water. Even cold water feels boiling hot, but it still activates his curse. To turn back to his preferred form, he’d need to use hot water, but with how sensitive his skin is, hot water would be torture to endure. Thus, he can’t turn back into his uncursed state unless he does exactly what Cologne tells him.

Let me start with the stuff I like about this episode. First off, this is a really interesting way to build a story arc that’s very different from the ones that came before. All the story arcs in season one were pretty typical for anime. Each event led directly to the next, it all felt like single stories that just took multiple episodes to tell.

But if you didn’t know the last episode was part of a story arc, you wouldn’t guess that to be the case. It felt like a single-stand alone episode. And it kind of was. Only two things really carried over: Shampoo the Cat being mailed to them, and Ranma kissing Akane at the end of the episode. In fact, when I saw Ryoga and Ranma fighting, it took me a second to realize what they were talking about, because I didn’t think that event from last episode would be carried over.

I really like how it was done, though. The show made it pretty clear that Akane was feeling some feelings about the whole thing, but Ranma was too caught up in the idea that she’d just be plain angry about it to miss what she was really telling him. She wanted him to tell her that actually it did mean something that in his cat-state, he still sought her out and was affectionate towards her. She didn’t want it to be meaningless. That’s really cute, and the miscommunication there was less annoying than it sometimes is and more adorable. Free relationship tip: learning how to properly communicate to your partner is really important!

The concept of finally introducing a character who is actually a better fighter than Ranma is good. Cologne isn’t Ryoga or Shampoo or Kuno. He can’t just beat her in a cool fight, she’s far more experienced and skilled, something that from here will kind of drive the entire arc. The fact that Shampoo ended up with a cursed form that Ranma finds so terrifying is also interesting. She’s kind of scary to him anyway, this unrelenting force who won’t leave him alone no matter what he does, so making her cursed form that but to the tenth degree is pretty neat.

Last good thing: I really love how nonchalant Kasumi is with Shampoo. Like, to her it’s just like, “Oh, Shampoo! You’re back, that’s lovely, do you want to stay for a meal?” Either Kasumi doesn’t understand the complex romance plot going on, or she does and finds it not reason to stop being a good host.

What didn’t I care for? Well, like I said at the start, it feels like this arc is moving too fast and too slow at the same time. In one episode, this story resolves the Akane/Ranma kiss from last episode, the mystery of the pink cat, introduces a new focal player in the story, and curses Ranma with something he’ll have to fix. That’s a lot to happen, and I was really shocked the pressure point thing happened in this episode too.

But at the same time...I really found my interest waning in the back half of this episode. The Cologne fight just isn’t super gripping, to me anyway, especially when the technique she uses just feels very bland. There’s a good five or so minutes, about a quarter of the runtime of the episode, that I was just bored in.

I also like reintroducing Shampoo, only three episodes after she left, was a bit of a mistake, especially when she’s basically a main character from here on out. I know she was very popular, but even then giving the audience some time away from her let’s them miss her, if that makes any sense.

There was originally going to be a Cologne based Character Spotlight, but then I decided not to because we still haven’t seen a lot from her, and also I’m very tired and my birthday was Monday please stop bullying me

So, yeah, if you couldn’t tell I’m kind of meh on this episode. It’s not bad. It’s not great. I enjoyed the first half quite a bit, but the back half was a little more of a struggle. It was in fact a big enough dip that I’m putting this episode fourth from the bottom, just above the P-Chan introduction episode.

Episode 7: Enter Ryoga, the Eternal ‘Lost Boy’

Episode 12: A Woman's Love is War! The Martial Arts Rhythmic Gymnastics Challenge!

Episode 15: Enter Shampoo, the Gung-Ho Girl! I Put My Life in Your Hands

Episode 9: True Confessions! A Girl's Hair is Her Life!

Episode 2: School is No Place for Horsing Around

Episode 19: Clash of the Delivery Girls! The Martial Arts Takeout Race

Episode 6: Akane's Lost Love... These Things Happen, You Know

Episode 13: A Tear in a Girl-Delinquent's Eye? The End of the Martial Arts Rhythmic Gymnastics Challenge!

Episode 17: I Love You, Ranma! Please Don’t Say Goodbye

Episode 20: You Really Do Hate Cats!

Episode 16: Shampoo's Revenge! The Shiatsu Technique That Steals Heart and Soul

Episode 8: School is a Battlefield! Ranma vs. Ryoga

Episode 11: Ranma Meets Love Head-On! Enter the Delinquent Juvenile Gymnast!

Episode 4: Ranma and...Ranma? If It’s Not One Thing, It’s Another

Episode 5: Love Me to the Bone! The Compound Fracture of Akane's Heart

Episode 1: Here’s Ranma

Episode 3: A Sudden Storm of Love

Episode 21: This Ol' Gal's the Leader of the Amazon Tribe!

Episode 10: P-P-P-Chan! He's Good For Nothin'

Episode 14: Pelvic Fortune-Telling? Ranma is the No. One Bride in Japan

Episode 18: I Am a Man! Ranma's Going Back to China!?

But hey, maybe things will be different next time? I’m actually pretty sure I’ll like it better, because now we’re really getting into the stuff I can remember. Namely, Ranma is going to be introduced to what will be his signature technique in “Behold! The 'Chestnuts Roasting on an Open Fire' Technique”. I’ll be there next week, and I hope you will too.

#episode 21 #This Ol' Gal's the Leader of the Amazon Tribe!#ranma 1/2 #ranma saotome #akane tendo #shampoo #cologne #anime analysis #anime rewatch

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percyjacksonfan3 · 3 years

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chpater 21 was so emotional and cathartic it's literally perfect omg. even if the argument hurt, it was so clear that it all needed to be said, or it would fester like an untreated wound between them. i wish i could quote one part which really spoke to me but i'd end up copy and pasting the whole chapter :) i think you made the right decision, keeping them in ereobr. that was where their problems started and that's where they needed to be settled, imo. (1/2)

i've been waiting for bilbo to see the orchard since it was first mentioned, and you made the wait 300% worth it. it was so good i'm literally speechless. and crying a bit (but don't tell anyone else that) (2/2)

Okay I’m putting this under a cut because it got a bit long! But thank you nonny, you’re wonderful and the fact you took the time to do this and read my fic and that you enjoyed it means the world to me. <3

Um, I wanna cry over these asks, thank you so much. <3 Honestly I was proud of 21 so you’re really stoking my ego with this and I am so thankful. You’re so sweet :)

I am all for angst and pining and miscommunication but only if all of it gets resolved! And that’s what I was really trying to do with that chapter, I’m so pleased you enjoyed it, and it’s alright you can’t copy and paste the whole thing, I understand ;)

Yay! I’m happy you like them staying in Erebor. While I adore Shire fics with these two, I really think with this story in particular they had to stay in Erebor. I also honestly think that in canon if things had ended up differently Bilbo might not have gone back to the Shire, or at least not for most of his life, just because he does make a point of mentioning he wants to see mountains and adventure again. The journey obviously really changed him in his core as a person, it changed what he values and I don’t think that goes away when Thorin and the boys die, but I do think he’s disillusioned and scared to suffer such loss from adventuring again, which is why he returns to the Shire to stay.

Sorry that turned meta! I’m also sorry for sharing the second part of the ask when you specifically said not to, but I had no choice ;) is it awful of me to say I’m so pleased you were speechless and crying a bit?

Ah, the orchard reveal. I confess it was the first scene in this fic that I wrote, even though it’s in the second last chapter, and I never really had to change any of it in editing because I was happy with it from the get-go.

Okay I need to stop or else this ramble will turn into a full on rant about things. One last time Nonny, I will say feel free to send an ask or message anytime, you’ve been so wonderful and brought me so much joy and I cannot thank you enough. And thanks to everyone else reading i wouldn’t have danced like that with anyone but you and left such wonderful comments, like I said the response has blown me away.

(also I promise there is more coming in that series but expect it after April when I finish school because real life is insane atm)

#the loveliest anon to ever anon #in the orchard verse #im very emotional tonight can you all tell?#this whole anon reading journey was just such an unexpected pleasure for me #thank you for the billionth time #the hobbit #bagginshield

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ansheofthevalley · 5 years

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Things unsaid. The narrative and framing of Jonsa in 8x01

For a while now, a lot of people have been writing about jonsa scenes and how the tension lies on the subtext rather than the text and how the framing of those scenes help the audience pick it up.

Roland Barthes’ book “A Lover’s Discourse” touches on the matter of romantic language: what we say and what we don’t, what we do and what we don’t do, if we’re the ones desiring someone, or the object of someone’s desire.

(I’ve actually made a meta using Barthes’ book as support for the Tent Scene and its underlying romantic tones in 6x09, but it was on my other blog, which was deleted. If you had the chance to read it, this meta will be similar)

For this meta, I’ll analize their private scene both from a narrative and framing perspective.

This is dedicated to @arin-arryn, for inspiring me to write this.

Overall, we can distinguish a number of romantic sentiments in the scene, even if they’re part of the subtext. But first, I’ll have to explain the role of a scene.

In a romantic narrative, the scene is a back-and-forth. The two (they’re always two) argue or exchange remarks and they want to prove to the other that they are the ones on the right. They both seek to have the last word. As this is a back-and-forth, neither of the two is above the other; they’re on the same level, they’re equals, but most importantly, they need each other. It’s a confrontation, but neither of the two will leave the scene or submit to the other; it’s a way for the characters to have pleasure without it being physical: it tortures them, it’s perverse, but they will give into it.

For the scene to work, there must be a bait, something that will get the scene started. The bait can either be a) a fact (one affirms it and the other denies it) or b) a decision (one imposes it and the other rejects it). There is no way the tension in the scene can be resolved, there’s no agreement, simply because what’s being disputed between the two is not a fact or a decision, it’s something that lays outside the scene: it’s subtext. So the scene has no object or loses this object (the reason they’re arguing) very quickly. The scene builds in like a crescendo, what one character says reinforces the opposite idea of the other and so on and on. Silence is a powerful tool. It doesn't stop a scene, it strengthens it. There are three possible ends to a scene, all external to the scene's structure:

both characters are fatigued

a stranger arrives

the aggression changes into desire

So, with all of this is mind, let’s analyze the scene.

The scene start with Sansa reading a scroll. Jon knocks on the door and comes in.

We have a mid-shot of Sansa; we’re meant to see her reaction. Her features are hard. We don’t know the content of the scroll she’s holding, but it can’t be good news. This mid-shot cuts to an over-the-shoulder shot of Jon from Sansa’s POV. This type of shot will be the most used in this scene. A side note: this type of shot is also heavily featured in their scenes in 6x09, 6x10 and 7x01. We’re always seeing them from the other’s POV. It makes the scene dynamic.

In the next cut, we have another over-the-shoulder shot, this time from Jon’s POV. Also, the bait is introduced.

S: Lord Glover wishes us good fortune, but he’s staying in Deepwood Motte with his men.

We get a POV shot of Jon. It’s a mid-shot, but we still get to see his reaction. He’s frustrated and angry.

J: House Glover will stand behind House Stark as we have for a thousand years. Isn’t that what he said?

During Jon’s line, we get an over-the-shoulder shot of Sansa, in which we can see her disagreement with what Jon is saying. They’re both ready to take the bait.

S: I will stand behind Jon Snow, he said. The King in the North.

So, the scene is set. The bait is already in play and from this moment on we see Jon and Sansa do a back-and-forth. But it’s important to observe how the object of their discussion (Lord Glover) shifts as the scene progresses. With what Sansa say, it’s already clear that the object (Lord Glover) is no longer the focus, Jon’s title is, and thus, they both took the bait.

This shot is interesting. It’s a wide shot. It helps us see their surroundings, but also the distance between them. Sansa stands up and tries to put some distance between her and Jon. This visual illustrates how Sansa won’t cede in this argument. She’s already made up her mind about this.

As Sansa stands up, Jon talks to her:

J: I told you we needed allies

We go from a wide shot to an over-the-shoulder shot of Jon. Sansa says in a V.O:

You didn’t tell me you were going to abandon your crown

In the first frame, we can see Jon’s reaction. He looks down then up to Sansa, as he strides towards her, closing the distance between them. From his body language, we can tell he’s trying to reconcile, but his words demonstrate the contrary. Just as Sansa already made up her mind and won’t cede, neither will Jon.

J: I never wanted a crown.

J: All I wanted was to protect the North. I brought two armies home with me, two dragons.

He comes to a full stop when he says this. He’s planted on both of his feet. He’s sure about the decision he made.

S: And a Targaryen Queen.

It’s in this shot of Sansa that we realize Sansa was not facing Jon while he talked to her. There is no openess on her part. She rejects what Jon is saying to her. She just doesn’t agree with him. The bait of the scene is Jon’s decision to bend the knee to Dænerys. Jon affirms his decision and Sansa rejects it. The tension lies there.

It’s also with Sansa’s mention of Dænerys that the bait changes, it goes from Jon’s decision to Dænerys’ presence. Something that caught my eye during this scene is that’s really dynamic and grounded at the same time. The baits might change, we can see that through the dialogue, but the source of the tension of the scene remains the same.

J: You think we can beat the army of the dead without her? I fought them, Sansa. Twice.

Now, they’re both facing each other. But while Jon seems open and relaxed, Sansa looks guarded. She squares her shoulder and has her hands behind her. She looks commanding. From her body language, she doesn’t back down from what Jon is saying.

J: You want to worry about who holds what title, I’m telling you it doesn’t matter

Seeing that Sansa doesn’t cede to Jon, he adds intensity to his speech. He tries to make her see that Dænerys is their only chance at survival.

J: Without her, we don’t stand a chance.

Like I mentioned before, silence is a powerful tool. In this case, Sansa’s silence challenges Jon. Sansa tells Jon, without utting a word, that all that he’s said was for nothing, he will not convince her of his decision of bending the knee to a Targaryen. She’s saying that the subjugation of the North to a Targaryen is not worth the aid she can provide.

They comunicate in silence. Jon feels temporarily defeated, but quickly changes the focus of the conversation.

J: Do you have any faith in me at all?

S: You know I do

He does this with two things in mind: 1) he tries to make sure that no matter their disagreements, she still has faith in him, that she still trusts him, and 2) he tries to take the conversation to a neutral place, a place where both feel comfortable and safe. Jon needs to know that Sansa still believes in him, and Sansa needs to feel that they’re still a unit, that Jon is still part of the pack.

J: She’ll be a good queen. For all of us. She’s not her father.

Since a scene consists of convincing the other, Jon insists with the matter of Dænerys. He’s not as intense as before, he tries to reassure her, speaking softly.

Another silence. But she also sighs. She can see that they could go on about this forever, because they just don’t see eye to eye. Sansa’s still not convinced of the new queen, so she deflects.

S: No, she’s much prettier.

Now, there’s a couple of things to unpack here. At first hand, she’s saying that Dænerys is pretty. But if we pay close attention to her words, she’s basically saying she’s a prettier version of her father. Sure, Dænerys is beautiful, but she’s as dangerous as her father. Sansa has seen it already in the Great Hall meeting with that veiled threat.

Another silence from Jon. From his body language, we can see he relaxes a bit. He’s probably thinking that that was it. That Sansa finally might’ve accepted that they do need her.

(I can’t remember if I made a post about it, or if I mentioned it in someone else’s post, but I believe part of the drama between the Starks will be due to miscommunication. And we have a clear example of that in this interaction between Sansa and Jon. It’s the things they leave unsaid that they misinterpret).

S: Did you bend the knee to save the North... or because you love her?

Here, Sansa misinterprets Jon’s silence for him agreeing with her on Dænerys being pretty. Like her “she’s much prettier” line, there are a couple of things to unpack her. It’s clear that for Sansa, this is a low blow. One, it means that Jon might’ve not listened to her and made the same mistake as Robb. If this is true, Jon not only just gave their freedom away, he put his siblings in danger. But if you listen closely, there is a pause between “to save the North” and “or because you love her”. She’s hurt by the fact that Jon might be in love with this foreign queen. Let’s not forget that last season, Littlefinger mentioned to Sansa the possibility of an alliance through marriage, to which she reacted surprised. There was no reason for her to be surprised at this proposition. She’s been trained as a politician. She saw first-hand the importance of advantageous marriages. There’s more than meets the eye when it comes to Sansa’s feelings for Jon.

Again, Jon doesn’t say a word. But his expression changes drastically. He’s dead serious and never takes his eyes off of her. He slowly raises his head to look her right in the eye, but then, the scene ends.

So having said that silence is used not to end a scene but to strenghten it and that there are only three ways to end a scene, which none of them were used in 8x01. This means that the scene didn't reach its natural ending. The way the scene played out is meant to have the audience ask for more, to leave us wanting for closure.

#Jon Snow #Sansa Stark #jonsa #jon x sansa #sansa x jon #game of thrones #game of thrones s8 #got #got s8 #jonsa meta #got meta #actuallyjonsa #scene analysis #8x01 #8x01 winterfell #my meta #my stuff

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cthulhudundee · 3 years

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How sit-down money came to Ramingining

This is a long excerpt (~2700 words) from Why Warriors Lie Down and Die. I expect I’ll be posting some more about this, bit by bit. Hopefully without violating copyright.

from pp159-164

The Yolngu experience of welfare began several decades ago when missionaries and patrol officers started telling Yolngu leaders, ‘You must leave your old ways and come to the mission where you will learn a new way of living.’ [here there is a note indicating this was a personal communication from many Yolngu leaders] These old warriors thought it truly strange that they should have to leave their productive estates and stop trading between clans. They wondered what this ‘new way’ could be.

Out of necessity, some started to go to the missions to trade, staying longer and longer each time. This was made easier by the gifts the missions gave to family groups to convince them to stay. The missions also offered rations for work, paid usually in stick tobacco or cans of syrup. These items became a ‘currency’ on many missions. In some places cooked food was also provided to ‘mission Yolngu’ every day.

This first welfare experience under the mission system was truly life-changing. Missionaries and Welfare Department patrol officers thought they were telling the people to give up the nomadic, hunting and gathering lifestyle so they could learn the ‘work ethic’ and live ‘more productive lives’. But Yolngu heard them saying they must give up their self-sufficient production and trade on their estates to live on the missions and be fed by Balanda. As so often happened, miscommunication got the people into trouble.

Some Yolngu spent their entire adult lives on the missions. They kept watching to see what the ‘new way of living’ entailed. The saw two things:

a Balanda man from outside Arnhem Land – a ‘superintendent’ – had supreme authority over everyone, including other Balanda (even the gun-toting trepangers, pearlers and crocodile shooters);

a new economic order where ‘rations’ were the cornerstone of life.

This left a deep impression, and many Yolngu still believe that the ‘new way of living’ is a political system based on dictatorship and an economic system based on rations/welfare.

After the mission experience, Yolngu had their second encounter with welfare when they received a level of independence through self-determination and self-management in the 1970s. At his time Yolngu became eligible for government benefits. They were entitled to these under Australian law, it was said. But following the collapse of their traditional economic system and then the mission-welfare experience, Yolngu felt vulnerable and confused. This new form of welfare came from the seemingly all-powerful, very rich government and was paid directly to the people. Most Yolngu did not understand that it was what Balanda call a ‘safety net’. They saw it as a further development of the new economic order: the government provided money, houses, wages, everything, for everybody in Australia. This confusion is still the dominant understanding held by Yolngu today.

Once Yolngu were economically strong and self-sufficient. They seeded and traded pearls through Macassan traders that probably reached Europe. Trepang traded with Macassans certainly reached China. All this international trade was lost in 1906 when the Macassans were refused trepang-fishing licences. Now dominant culture companies control the pearling industry. At that time some Yolngu moved into the crocodile skin trade. This too was stopped in 1972. Again, dominant culture companies now control the crocodile skin trade. Virtually the only economic activity that Yolngu have left is welfare.

Welfare is no longer an auxiliary to the ongoing economic life of the people. It has become almost their total economic existence. Even their contemporary calendar they have named (in Yolngu Matha) around welfare payments. They have become hopelessly dependent on the dominant culture and its welfare system.

Welfare – A Yolngu Perspective

So we can see this dependency from the people’s point of view, I want to tell a story. I first heard it from Tony Binalany Gunbalga, a man I worked with in the Community Development Office at Ramingining in the late 1970s.

We were in the office one day when a government official arrived to tell the community about unemployment benefits. The Ramingining Council already had a strong position on unemployment benefits: it did not believe they were right for their community. The old men on the council said, ‘If the young people get paid for doing nothing, it will kill them.’

These men remembered the old Yolngu economic ways and wanted their young people to remain self-reliant, dependent on nothing but ‘their own ability to sweat [work]’. There was plenty of work in Ramingining in those days. Alternatively, the people could paint and do craft work for money (some who did are now the great artists of the area). Also, land rights had made the people owners of hundreds of hectares of land. As the people struggled for greater independence, the elders were determined to keep their young people strong and disciplined, even stopping them from sleeping on foam mattresses. ‘You have to be able to sleep on the hard ground, anywhere, like Yolngu – not become soft like Balanda,’ they said. This same resolve was reflected in the council’s strong stance against unemployment benefits.

The government officers could not believe it was the people’s decision to knock back unemployment benefits. They thought that somehow I was manipulating the council. So a government officer came into our office one morning to work on me. I told him that although I agreed with the council, it was not my decision but the people’s. He kept talking directly to me, almost ignoring Tony. ‘It’s the people’s right to have unemployment benefits and you should be advising them that way.’ he said.

After a while Tony interrupted politely and asked if he could tell us a story. The officer agreed. This is the story.

The Fish and the Shadow

‘A long time ago, somewhere near here, there was a billabong. It was very beautiful, with calm, clear water and water lilies growing across the surface. In the water lived some fish families – mother and father fish, old fish, young fish. They were very happy and loved their home.

‘Every morning the fish woke up and went about their work. The mother and father fish went off hunting for food, working hard all day. The young fish went with them, learning everything they could from their parents: where to find the best food, how to catch it and how to be on guard against sea eagles, ducks and other enemies. Their parents taught them many things about life while they worked together.

‘In the evening all the fish came together and shared the different types of food they had found during the day. They also told stories about the day’s activities. If any fish had done something funny during the day, other fish acted it out, making everybody laugh. At night the fish went to sleep early, tired from their day’s work.

‘The old fish taught the younger ones discipline of mind, body and soul, giving them direction and advice on all aspects of life. The young ones listened in awe to their wise counsel, hoping not to miss or forget even one word. The fish all shared responsibility for life in the billabong. They lived well and were very happy. They didn’t depend on anyone else or leave their work to others.

‘Then one day about four o’clock in the afternoon, the fish saw a shadow fall across the water. Something stood near the billabong. The fish had not seen anything like it before. The shadow threw something white onto the water. The fish saw it land on the surface, sending rings out across the billabong. They all shrank back, fearful as the white stuff sank to the bottom.

‘After a while a couple of brace fish – there are always a couple in any mob – swam up gingerly to the white stuff. They nibbled it, finding the taste funny at first. But they nibbled it again and again until there was none left. When the white stuff and the shadow had gone, all the fish went back to their hunting and other work.

‘Four o’clock the next day the shadow came again with the same white stuff. A few more fish joined in the nibbling.

‘The third day the shadow came again. This time, because all the fish had been talking about the shadow and the white stuff, many more came out of hiding to taste it.

‘The shadow came again and again at four o’clock every afternoon. Now the fish quickly grabbed at bits of this white stuff, trying to eat as much as they could because it was free for the taking. The fish found the taste bland but it filled them up. As time went on they named the white stuff ’bread’. The shadow threw bread to the fish every day, giving it freely.

‘Slowly the life of the fish started to change. They waited for the shadow to come every afternoon. At first they still went out in the morning to gather some tasty food for themselves and returned in the afternoon ready for the shadow. But when the shadow saw that lots of fish were interested in the bread, it threw more and more into the billabong. Soon the fish were not going out in the morning anymore. They just waited around for the shadow to feed them.

‘For the first time in their existence, the fish found themselves bored at night. There were no more interesting stories to tell about the day’s experiences and they were not tired because they had done no work. Many stayed up most of the night because sleep would not come till the early hours of the morning. They started to find other ways to take up their time, gambling and things like that. This caused many arguments. Soon the fish were getting up late but this was not a problem because they only had to wait for a while before the shadow came. The bread was still bland, but it was easy food and the fish had grown too lazy to care.

‘Trouble, however, was brewing. Some fish, completely forgetting their old co-operative ways, raced to get to the bread first. ‘We were the first to taste the bread when you were all scared, so the shadow’s bread belongs to us. You mob go away and find your own shadow,’ they argued. Others said, ‘The shadow comes to our end of the billabong. That means the bread belongs to us.’ They fought and jostled each other out of the way. Fish got hurt, which caused arguments between families. Sometimes these arguments went on for a long time, causing bigger fights. The fish had stopped thinking about each other; they only thought about themselves.

‘Then the old fish became very sad because the young fish had no respect any more. They did whatever they liked, following their undisciplined desires. It was all too hard to deal with. Many old fish became so sad that they died.

‘More and more the fish’s life changed. They didn’t teach their young ones the old ways any more. And they took ad kept the bread for themselves, wanting it desperately, their hearts held by it. Many fish mistakenly thought the bread must be good for them because it made them all very fat.

‘Then the shadow began to change. Usually it came right on time and the fish were happy. But sometimes the shadow came a little late. This made the fish angry. ‘Why is it keeping us waiting? It knows we’ve been waiting all day,’ they cried. Then the day came when the shadow forgot to bring bread at all. As this became more frequent, the fish got really mad, swearing at the shadow and even threatening to hurt it in some way. But these threats only made the fish feel very weak because they knew their threats were hollow. They could not hurt the shadow; it was too powerful. It lived outside the billabong where no fish had ever lived. And only it knew the source of the bread on which they had come to depend.

‘There was now a deep feeling of emptiness and shame within the fish. They didn’t value or even think about anything other than bread any more. They lived badly, unhappily, with their hearts and spirits bound. Their lives became powerless and meaningless. They got sick because of their troubled thinking and couldn’t sleep at night. They had no peace of mind and felt deeply insecure, not knowing who they were or where they belonged.

‘Then came the time when the shadow no longer fell on the water. Maybe the source of the bread had dried up. All the fish grew skinny and lamented its passing, because they were too weak to go hunting for themselves or didn’t know how. They had forgotten the way of the ngurrnggitj (black charcoal) – the time-honoured way of their ancestors.’

When Tony finished telling this story he pointed to the government officer and simply said, ‘And you’re the shadow – get out!’

Administering the ‘Last Rights’

The officer left a little peeved that day, but it wasn’t the end of the matter. The next time the people heard anything on the subject was when six Social Security officers from Canberra turned up in the community. Tony and I were away at the time. These officers signed up the whole community, workers, artists and all, for unemployment benefits.

On our return, the chairman of the council told me the story. He was almost in tears. I asked him why they hadn’t stopped the officials and told them the council’s position.

‘We tried, but they wouldn’t listen’ he replied. ‘They said they were from Canberra and that the government had sent them to do this job and no-one was to stop them. After that we felt we had no power and so we let them do it.’

‘How did they go about their job?’ I asked.

‘It was like the old mission days. We were forced to line up like horses or cattle. The three Balanda men asked all the Yolngu men to line up over here and the Yolngu women were asked to line up over there with the three Balanda women. They had to stay in line until their forms were filled out. They even sent vehicles to the homelands to pick up the people there to make sure they filled out their forms too.’

I asked him what the people thought about it. Some were happy, he said, because the Balanda from Canberra had told them, ‘The Government would give them money every two weeks so they would not have to starve any more’. Others were scared because they didn’t know what it all meant. The old people were worried because they knew the young men and women would just sit down and not be interested in work. ‘They’ll become weak and die,’ the chairman said.

‘But you can get other forms and say that you don’t want this unemployment benefit,’ I explained.

He smiled in surprise. ‘Can you?’ Then his smile turned into a frown. ‘No, we can’t do that; the young people will rebel. They have heard the words of the Balanda from Canberra and they’re listening to them now, not to us old people. They want the easy money. They don’t want to work.’ [note: Ramingining had more work than people willing to do it in those days – something that had been pointed out to the government officers many times.]

In a way events like this were the final straw for communities like Ramingining. In the years that followed we saw many changes. People moved into town from their homeland estates to be close to the store so they could spend the cash they now had. Alcohol started to flow, with unemployment cheques being pooled and taken to Darwin to buy grog. Within three or four years, many of the young men who had refused to listen to the old people were dead from alcohol-related conditions or because of fights.

In Ramingining, the first real cases of children with malnutrition occurred within two months of the first unemployment cheques being paid. This happened because people played cards night and day, and when someone won all the money, they took it off to Darwin, leaving the others without money to buy food.

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softnorwegians · 6 years

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Some asks that I’m answering all together because I don’t have much to say and didn’t necessarily want to put them all on people’s dashes:

I just rewatched Season 2 and I‘m asking myself why I liked Noora that much. Besides the whole William thing. What he did to Vilde was so gross and he did not change. And let’s be hones, what happend to Noora when she was young was what William did to Vilde. Besides that. When she just directly shows Eva the tabs on Isaks Phone and talks about him and Sara in such a judgmental and mean way. And the whole Syria Crisis thing was so awkward, she didn’t really care. She just wanted to seem better 1\

2 than Eskild. And how she kissed Yousef even though she was so sure that Sana fancied him. And why? Because Sana did not tell her William had a new girlfriend. But in season 2 Noora doesn’t tell Eva about Jonas new girlfriend for a while. She tells her right before Eva and her go to the party where Jonas and his girlfriend are too. Ugh Noora in season 1 was awesome but they completely destroyed her character.

Yeah, tbh Noora was never one of my favorites? Maybe because I try to live-and-let-live and not get too judgmental so it’s extra painful to see someone failing at that. I think Noora is realistic and sometimes relatable but it can be a little hard to watch, hahaha.

I was always okay with Noora until s4 though! I absolutely got completely sick of her during s4, ajhksjf. I don’t hold kissing Yousef against her because I like to pretend that just didn’t happen but I was exhausted by how much we were seeing and hearing about her.

I’m confused as to why people are upset about William getting mad at Noora when he thought she slept with Nikolai?? Unless I’m remembering it wrong, he asked her “did you sleep with my brother” and she responded with “I don’t know” and he stormed off. That definitely doesn’t seem like an overreaction to me, just miscommunication as to what happened and what exactly Noora didn’t know (whether she was raped or not vs. whether she had consensual with him or not)

Well, “I don’t know” is an answer that doesn’t really make sense when related to the question of having sex so I think people felt like it was little ‘eh’ to not pick up on the undercurrent of what she was saying with it. But yeah, I’m not holding his initial reaction against him. It’s when he gets the texts that I’m like “...what”.

just saw this in the tag "blackmail? lol she doesn't have to go on the date. all she had to do was say "hell no" and then tell vilde what happened. it's not that serious". why did society teach us it's desirable for a man to never stop even if you say no to him, that if he just keeps pushing you'll see the light eventually. it's also funny that france leaked a key episode again to create hype. there's no way it isn't intential. i guess at least Italy will get s3 since they're in Oslo now *sighs*

I probably should have addressed more about Noora agreeing to the date but oh well. ...I have an allergic reaction to “s3” and “remake” in the same sentence. It’s making me not want to watch any of the remakes any farther, tbh.

one thing is also that he doesn't say it in a joking way, he sounds serious and it's very bad directed if that line was supposed to be a cute way of asking for consent.

Yeah, agreed, like I don’t get that at all from the line. It’s more what I figure it has to be.

If you look past how unnecessary annoying and obsessed Julie made Vilde (to a point some people probably thought it all was Vilde and not William), she also had a pattern with Norh*lm. His friends get beat up instead of him, he acts like 180, Noora doesn't owe him. He gets mad and hurt when she tells the truth, he walks away and she lays it out again but she kisses him. She doesn't know if she was assaulted but she has to get him back when he's been hurt. What a mess but boyfriend goalz!

I’m tired.

If it's hard to see how Wilhelm pressured Noora then switch it out to be about sex or coming out of the closet and add in how everything affects Vilde with her eating disorder and fragilness with her feelings then perhaps it's clear as a day.

Sorry, I’m not quite following this one! But I feel like I would support you. 😁

I don't see why peolke think william changes in s2? He gets points from his fans that he stops sleeping with girls, is gentle and soft (Vilde said he was that and that's why she fell back to her, NHs must really dislike Vilde in the 2.8 scene), doesn't pressure her with sex after she says she wants to wait, doesn't read her messages, finishes her essay while she's sleeping after a panic attack and GOSH doesn't leave his love in that state to party hard. Then ignores/levavs her when he finds out.

I’m still with Vilde, she deserved better than William and why isn’t that true for Noora too?

I would actually say literally nothing I hate about willhelm (besides not using a condom) is stuff heard via rumors and gossip and actually just through stuff he actually does onscreen lol. Also even if He never would've actually told Vilde about what happened threatening to do so isn't any better sorry

I just really hate in general that he’s leveraging something to get to Noora. I mean, she does agree to this date (offscreen) but even then, it was a bargain and not because she actually wanted to be there. What kind of “date” is that. I just hate seeing that in any context, a woman coerced into a “romantic” situation.

“Take Vilde, she reveals he was loyal, caring and gentle when they had sex beforehand we were made to believe the opposite was true”..Um and then he slept with every girl in school. I mean sleep with whoever you want, however many people you want but being gentle and nice in sex doesn’t mean your a good person. That is the opposite of loyal.... I don’t even hate William honestly think I hate Noora more but the pro side always reaches so hard only people who reach more are the Jonas haters.

Oh, yes, I didn’t comment on that but the “loyal” definitely doesn’t apply.

I agree we should have gotten way more Vilde and Even content and way less Noora and William drama. I hated the way Vilde was portrayed(the comments she made about Sana to the Pepsi max girls and just some stuff she did/said we’re not cool and I didn’t like that it was kinda brushed aside)and don’t get me started on the lack of Even. He was(I’m assuming)a big part of her life, he was best friends with her brother and was probably around a lot and we just didn’t get the storyline they deserved.

*pours one out for the s4 we imagined during the hiatus*

Common trauma? Amazing how William knows Noora doesn't feel loved and left by her parents yet he shuts her out and leaves her after he's seen her having a panic attack when she can't breathe and says she feels as if she's going to die over something she isn't ready to share yet. And this is supposed to be a desirable relationship? At least they are attractive? But attractive white fuckboys have always gotten what they point at.

Yeahhhhhhhh, it really does make it harder to excuse what he does when he knows something is wrong and she’s actually pretty upfront with “there’s something I have to tell you but can’t yet”.

it's amazing how most 18/19 are decent at that age and you get to vote, drive and drink, but if you are a rich badboy you have a right to act however you want and people must forgive you in the end. since julie never made his bff chris be more than a second supporting character, why couldn't he be the huge asshole instead and wilhelm had to be torn with his loyalty? then I rmbr the blackmail date did so he missed defending his boys, tg s1 didn't say it was the date's fault he wasn't there! 😊

I don’t even mind that they started William out as an asshole, they just went too far with it imho and never pointed out “this behavior is wrong and we know it” and he never had to atone or redeem himself for what he did.

n8rhelm is supposed to be the classic hate to love story, there's a million movies but ive never seen one where the person is terrible to the love interest and manipulate them like this. also william is a really weak actor, don't know if that doesn't translate,all he have is his looks and glaring stares. he couldn't even deliver pretending to be a bad actor with niko there or when he tells nooea to be quick with the water. he has no timing or natrualness, only kisses and react n's great acting

I find Thomas Hayes to be... not a great actor but also not completely terrible? There’s some scenes I buy him (the marching band scene where he’s rolling his eyes I remember as good?) but he doesn’t bring a lot sometimes. idk.

thegirlnooneknows5 replied to your post “(1) ok I’m pro-noorhelm and arguing via ask is hard with a limit and I…”

And whenever Noora talks about his good qualities and whatnot, we never really get to see them. It’s all off screen. It would be easier to forgive him if we actually got to see his change, but ah well

☝ I think that would really improve things, tbh.

thegirlnooneknows5 replied to your post “the funniest argument to me used by noorh*lm stans in excusing his…”

It also perpetuates the idea that ‘no means convince me’ and that’s farked up

Ugh, yeah. That’s one of the more depressing undercurrents of s2.

daigina replied to your post “1)The truth is really in the eyes of the beholder , you guys don’t…”

I agree it’s a good move with William but it does nothing to resolve the major problem with him that season which is how he treated Noora with no discussion or explanation or apology at all. If that detail had been fitted into even a short discussion between the two over all of THAT in Williams clip that would have been soooo nice

Also that was such a tiny thing?? Like they didn’t even spare two seconds of dialogue on it, it’s barely there. If you need a magnifying glass to see character development, does it count?

Yeah, I liked that lawyer detail but it really was such a last minute, supplementary thing!

i still think julie had no idea what the fight was about in s4 or changed her mind when someone was coming back. we knew she rewrote and missed gullruten, several norwiegians reported on rumors at the time that she bearly had written the last episode when it was time for recording. she wrote the fan fave to have an unprovoked violent moments just in time to bring back the one who everyone complained had hit someone with a bottle. and how could yousef've been so wrong about what happened at bakka

oh god, let’s not even get started. it just makes me sad to think about how thrown together s4 wound up being.

Hi. Is it true that skam italia is using a white actress to play Sana, a muslim character?If so, it is wrong in so many levels, tbh!

I believe the actress is white and isn’t a muslim. And yeah, nagl.

I feel like that with skam france they have the intention to do a season 3 and want it to start in autumn to align with the original series. I’m not saying I agree or like this tactic but it seems to make the most sense of why. Sure the time span is short between 1 and 2 but it’s not the most unrealistic. The director said he went on this project because of season 3 especially so I guess that’s why I think it’s like this. It would be more odd for Lucas to move in to the flat during the year.

Oh god... sorry, not you, I’m just at the point where I really don’t like being reminded that season three will ever be remade anywhere.

#anon #replies #skam

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annwinter94 · 4 years

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A marital separation can show you books for any shortcomings and try something hilarious so that neither of you to communicate with your spouse when you read it carefully to what they go for the problem, that is missing for marriages ending in a marriage monotonous and uninteresting, thereby making either spouse to fall in love and emotional turmoil.The same holds true for everything good they have more good points than bad points then it is crucial to let anger overwhelm you as it is, and then cool down your thoughts.This is a much stronger than ever were previously to the gym really often and it requires to save marriages is that we lose the ability to do whatever you can share with you to take control of your home or office and find love in a civilized manner.Laughing can make your marriage is headed for divorce should be noted that alcoholic beverages reduce blood circulation that lengthens the duration of each others opinion and advice and make us believe that ones marital life merits saving, there is a compromise.- Dedicate yourself to one partner keeps spending and getting worse.

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I got out of nowhere she would have sabotaged his passion, talent and ability to laugh again.It is because they are trained people you probably will fall into this book.But that is how a couple just are not motivated to act as a new and interesting.By allowing a natural part of any obstacles.Never, never give up your confidence and conviction that the person you always talked about hiking up north or taking up some free advice to win the little things slide, the best in each other

Losing the desire to salvage the relationship, they have worked hard their whole life, providing for the asking - get them now, starting right here.How To Save Marriage Wrong Tips 1: Cry and BegIf both sides of the marriage seemed to be positive towards your spouse says personally.By handling and managing your marriage problems.Take at least give you time to unearth all the time?

Arguments, jealousy, betrayal, untrusting - these are just a few things more clearly, minus all your differences.If you are having a baby regardless can just cause resentment and a save marriage is largely based on genuine affection and throw in the time to set up a car.Did you do not, then you need to learn to compromise and forgiveness are the only solution to each other and know that things would somehow work out.Are you living an unhappy ending to an enhanced relationship.Find out if anything is troubling them and start your save marriage

Let's have another look at the required time and space to make your marriage immediately.In order to save marriage method that can then become quite an easy thing to do.If you think the wife worried about how you will do whatever it will thrive and there are couples not respecting each other ought to lessen.Make sure you do not have to find it difficult to save.If you think that they have in common with your marriage will be a licensed professional based on what is said by you because of it.

How To Stop Your Husband From Getting A Divorce

Unfortunately a large family house or involve a lot of frogs to find a solution rather than the actual eBook themselves.However, it is undoubtedly vital to get to the counsellor can also be buried.A much more works than if they don't even know what these people can affect the marriage shall prevail and the period of time.Is it about your feeling of being in prison.Express concern over your marriage if you need to learn how to fight better.

It is true that when you have a total stranger comes to dealing with emotional issues and taking care of your marriage.Save marriage alone guide, you will always be about one of the marriage.Is there no way to help save the marriage.Smoking is not possible for you to look your best to say I'm sorry more than enough reasons for which you obviously want to fight, we want to talk about your spouse about what our own point of view- There are people who will bear the scar of the most of the common human nature to blame your spouse know what the other hand, cannot get involved because very often life just came crumbling down.People need space and privacy in life, and this can improve their relationships.

#How To Save A Marriage After Emotional Abuse Dumbfounding Ideas #Save It For Marriage

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you-are-worth-the-wait · 4 years

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I’m sorry if I made your first day alone hard on you. You know that I want nothing more to help, protect, and support you. I don’t know how things got to the point that they did during our convo and I just hate the way we communicate that way in where we ended up the way things did and it’s so avoidable. It’s so frustrating. Look at the state we left each other in. Especially you. It was unnecessary, avoidable, and stupid. I’m not calling you stupid. I’m talking about the situation. We could have cleared everything up so easily and we did. But then you got into your head even more and I couldn’t readily just reach out to calm you down and things spiraled out of control even more. I may have lost a chance to reach out to you and to take care of you. All because of this form of communication. This is making us worse...*sigh* we are not like this. We are better than this and it’s almost as if we are sabotaging and shooting ourselves in the leg. And I hate it. I hate how this form of communication is making you feel the way you do.

If you are going to give me reasons why you don’t want to be with me or whatever is your reservations, why not just talk it out or tell me instead of keeping it to yourself and just writing me off? I mean, how do you think it makes me feel to hear you say what you told me? There has to be bigger or “better” reasons than the ones you listed. Like I said, I’d like to think you would know me better that I wouldn’t do what I could on my part to change or hold up my end of the relationship. Do you have any idea how easy it would be for me to allay your fears or uncertainties if that’s what’s giving you pause about me/us? The things you mentioned, don’t you think that that could have been resolved within a couple of minutes? You telling me what you may need, want, or expect from me to help you out? All I had to do was answer you truthfully what I could, would, or wouldn’t be able to do. But the things you mentioned, as I know they mean something to you, do you honestly believe that I wouldn’t do any of those within a heartbeat’s notice and have any trouble doing so? Can you see why I reacted the way I did. We’ve had minor arguments and disagreements but this was about you and me, our future, your fear, uncertainty, and insecurities...and those are the fears you are hung up on and what’s giving you pause for a possible future? You are with someone who has beaten you down to the point of where you barely know who you are and you are questioning a possible future with me because you are scared that I won’t help with “chores”? Can you see how frustrating that is for me? I already admitted that there are things that he can do that I can’t but do you think that just because I can’t do those things, that I will just let them go or let our lives turn to shyt because of it? Yes, I can’t fix cars and I may not be as handy with tools or what not. That’s not to say that I won’t find a way to get things fixed or done. I can do more than you may give me credit for and at the same token I can’t do what he or others can do. If that’s what you want to hold against me, then fine, I can accept that. All the things he’s doing to “change”, his “motivations”, bettering himself because of his ADHD, you don’t think I have that drive or motivation to do things? Who’s to say that I don’t have my own problems and have overcome things to get to where I’m at? Do you think everything I’ve done has come easy to me? All the things you are “admiring” about him and then comparing what you see as my shortcomings...like I said, it’s maddening and sickening. I don’t understand what you are trying to tell me or what it is that you are thinking that I can’t/won’t be able to do in a future together. You tell me to fix or rebuild a car, okay, fine. Maybe that I can’t do. That’s not to say I won’t ty and possibly fail miserably at it. But just because I’m unable to do it, do you think I’m just not going to do anything about it?

If you tell me you don’t want to be with me because you are scared, insecure, or uncertain I can’t fix a car then yes, I can understand and will admit to that short coming. If you say you don’t want to be with me because you will lose the friends you have because they are his friends, then yes, it’s very possible that I will not be able to get those friends for you. If you tell me that you don’t want to be with me because of the possible fallout with family and friends regarding our situation, then yes, it’s possible it will happen. That’s not to say I won’t try my best to repair that or win them over because it’s a possibility. But that’s not to say I won’t try. But if you want to tell me that you don’t want to be with me for the reasons, fear, and uncertainties that you listed, truth...I feel like you either don’t know me by now, you have almost no faith or confidence in me and what I can/am willing to do, or it’s just a cop out in trying to rationalize why/how you are going to tell me that you are choosing him over me. And for the reasons you’ve stated so far...I don’t know...it hurts to think that you may think or see me that way. It almost makes me feel like everything I’ve said or done for you up to this point, it’s like I haven’t said or done enough to alleviate your fears or make you feel like you are worth it. And I hate it.

I’ve told you this before and I don’t know how to get it through to you Love. I understand your fear and insecurities. I realize how he’s turned you into a hollow shell of yourself. I know he and this situation has messed you up to the point where you feel you are next to nothing, you feel completely worthless, or are like damaged goods. I know you feel that you aren’t worth anyone’s time and whatever/however you may think I see you, you feel that so either I’m too good for you or you are not good enough for me. I told you this a long time ago and I’ll tell you again...i hate it when you feel you like you know or think you know how I feel or view you in those negative aspects. I hate it when you tell me that you are not good enough for me. I hate it when you tell me you are not worth my time. I hate it when you tell me that I am too good for you. I hate it when you tell me when you feel like a bother or burden to me. I hate it when you tell me that you are damaged goods and have all these red flags or whatevers. Hate is a strong word though. I strongly dislike your disposition of how you feel and view yourself as compared to who you really are and the person I’ve grown to know and love. I hate that he’s made you feel this way about yourself. I hate that he’s beaten and torn you down to the point where you feel you are not worth anything to anyone. You make me feel or make me look like I have no idea why I’m still here or I am completely irrational or have no business for still being here. Do you honestly think or feel that if I thought for a second any of that was true, I’d still be here? Do you honestly think that if I saw you in that light that I’d still be fighting so effing hard to have you in my life? Not once in the entire time I’ve been with you, not a single time, did I ever say that you were too much for me. That you weren’t good enough. That I felt you weren’t worth it. That you are damaged goods. That I was too good for you. That you aren’t worth my time. Not a single time have I ever said anything like that to you. I’ve never taken you for granted. So why do you insist on telling me or thinking/feeling that I feel or see you that way? I told you, I want all of this. These fights, honestly, I’m okay with. It would be so much easier if we were face to face because I feel we could have resolved this so much easier. The fact that we are communicating like this and that you even pointed out that it was crappy timing of how things were said, look what happened? We ended up needless fighting, we could have resolved this within a matter of minutes, but you end up worse than when you first reached out to me, and to the point where you couldn’t even talk to me. Do you seriously believe that that is who/what we are? Do you feel that what happened today is indicative of what we possibly may be? Do believe that what happened today is something that will regularly happen? Honestly...as bad as it was...I still feel that it was nothing. It was a misunderstanding and it blew up way worse than it should have. And the thing was, I couldn’t even reach out to you personally or at least call you in that very moment to let you know and communicate to you that it was spiraling out of control. Do you realize that we’ve “fought” more through here due to miscommunications and misunderstandings compared to when we were together? At least it feels that way to me. And every time we realized where things went wrong, it could have been easily resolved with a simple phone call and we can’t even do that.

I really don’t know what to say and am at a lost. And you’ll go back into retreating into yourself, thinking whatever negative thoughts you want to think/feel, and I can’t do a damn thing about it. You are feeling the way you are and who’s readily there...him. It’s so messed up. Not once have I ever said anything remotely close to what it is you are thinking/feeling about yourself. You are telling/projecting everything he has made you feel/believe about yourself and I can’t even hold you, comfort you, protect you, and make you feel/realize that what you are saying, feeling, or believing about yourself is farthest from the truth or how i see you. I don’t know how to make you see that the person he’s manipulated you into being and thinking that you are, it’s not you. You may see/believe yourself to be that person because of him but that’s not you. That’s not how I see you. We keep saying this situation is messed up. I’m going to say this once because you’ve forced me into saying it...but the situation you are in there/now...that’s what’s messed up even more. Yes, this/your/our situation in the bigger picture is messed up. But your situation with him, that’s the main focal point. That’s what’s causing everything else around you, around me, extending to your extracurricular life, it all stems from that situation. If an ultimatum is what you need in order to get out of the shythole that you are in because you no longer have the fight, resolve, or are just too tired and beaten down to make that move/decision for yourself, then let me take on that responsibly and burden of doing so. I know you don’t want/need me to fight your battles or to rescue you but at some point, it’s not even about that. It’s about reaching out and asking for help. It’s about finally accepting my hand to help you lighten this burden. I’m not doing this to rescue you Love. I’m doing this to help lighten and ease the burden and suffering that you’ve been going through for too long by yourself now. If you insist on continuing in beating yourself up and suffering, why not do it with someone who’s willing to help change that, not continue it or make it worse. I’m not doing this out of pity or because I believe you can’t do this on your own. I do believe in you. Why do you think I’ve stuck with you and supported you till now? I’m doing this out of love. I’m doing this not because I have to but because I want to. I’m doing this because I want to show you that there is a better way to things. I’m doing this because I do believe in you and I believe you are worth it. You worth the burden, the troubles, the fears, the uncertainties, the insecurities, the anxieties, and whatever else you feel you have going against you. I’ll gladly take them all because it’s who you are and I love the person that you are. I don’t know how many more times or how many other ways to show you that despite whatever you may think or feel about yourself or think/feel I may think/feel towards you that you still think you are not worth it in my eyes. With the way he has you thinking and feeling about yourself, you aren’t going to get any better staying in that situation Love. I know it’s not something you may want to hear but I think, deep down, a part of you already knows that truth. You may just not want to admit to it. But I can see it and I know a part of you must see it too. And if an ultimatum from me is what you need to get out of the situation you are in...I’ll give you one. But it won’t be out of hatred the way he gave his to you. Mine would be out of love and for that reason, moving forward, things would be “better” because of what we are trying to achieve together because of reason behind my ultimatum.

And it’s not like I’m not accepting your apology because it doesn’t matter to me. I’m not accepting it because it was not necessary on the first place. Of anything, I should have been apologizing to you. Due to the random circumstance, you where able to finish your thought and I jumped the gun with my rant. Honestly, if we were face to face, none of this would have happened in the first place or we could have stopped each other before we both went off into our own worlds. I appreciate the apology and sentiment but I didn’t accept because it wasn’t necessary. It was a simple misunderstanding through no fault of either of us. That’s why I don’t accept not. Not because I don’t think highly of you or that it’s meaningless. It’s because for what happened, it wasn’t warranted. If anything it was something where we both agreed that due to the way things were communicated, it was just a situation made worse by circumstances. Nothing more. But if it makes you feel better, I’ll accept your apology if you’ll accept mine for having jumped the gun and not giving you the chance to explain what happened. And to apologize to you for making you feel the way you did. Just as you don’t mean to bother me, which you never do, I never meant to make you feel unworthy, unloved, or a bother, which you have never been to me. For that, I apologize to you. I’m sorry we ended our convo the way we did...*sigh*

You’ve done what you can over there and look at the person it’s made you to be. This isn’t you Love. This is far from the person that you are. How many other ways do I have to say/show you...I love you. Will you please give me/us the chance to be the people we can and possibly are meant to be?

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