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makelemonade · 1 year

Text

Happy Birthday!

Relations: Ayato, Albedo, Alhaitham, Aether, Childe, Cyno, Scaramouche/Wanderer x Gender Neutral Reader (separate obv )

Warnings: uhm slight angst, swearing, too much fluff ew (aw), forgetting abt ur birthday (literally all of them do)

support me on kofi!! link is on master list (pinned post)

Ayato:

-I’ll be so fucking supercalfraglicious rn, that man won’t even be able to spend it with you.

-Yoimiya and Ayaka def bet 10$ he forgets acc

-but because I’m SUCH a sucker for angst to fluff

-In the morning, he won’t even know what day it is. He’ll be to tired to comprehend anything. He’s not a morning person in the slightest

-He does wake up before you though due to the work, so you’ll still be asleep while he greats ready and gives ur forehead a lil smooch before he heads out to do any tasks or duties

-you’ll wake up upset to see NO GIFT LIKE WTF

-richest man in Inazuma CANT even get u anything ?!

-maybe he left it for thoma so he can give it to you when you wake up!!

-when you go eat breakfast, ur eyes light up to see thoma holding a gift but slightly dim when it’s none other than his and not your beloveds.

-nonetheless your happy you got a gift !!

-it’ll be a few hours and STILL no gift. Thoma tells you with a sad dog pout face that Ayato did forget

-so you actually spend the day with him!!! thoma >>>>>

-your back in the evening, signs of daylight all gone as night was to hit

-when ur back you fully come to terms Ayato did forget about your birthday because he didn’t even wish you a happy bday :)

-you walk past him sitting on the bed with a few bags of stuff you liked that Thoma bought as another gift and Ayato looked at you confused

“Who bought you all of that?” He asked, sitting up and setting a few work files down on the bed.

“Thoma.” You answered, not even sparing him a glance.

“Confusion grew more along with a tinge of jealousy. “What was the occasion?”

“My birthday.”

-I’m telling u rn any type of emotion DROPS

-he lowkey might start crying

-hell ask u to sit on the bed and apologize for everything and like just kiss u all over and if ur still mad he’ll understand but like god knows you can’t stay mad at him

-he acc takes u on a shopping spree the next day and tasks Thoma with inviting all of your friends so when you get back to the estate, it’s none other than a surprise party!!

Albedo

-HE DOESNT EVEN KNOW WHAY A BIRTHDAY IS

-thankfully you explained it to him a few weeks before your birthday and even if he isnt human, he’d like to partake in it

-but he’s never done this before so he has to seek out Kaeya for them

-he went to Klee first but decided It wasn’t best to give you a bomb for your birthday

-Kaeya tells him all type of gift ideas and Albedo acc saves up a bunch of his money to buy you all your favourite stuff

-he’s so cute

-he tries to bake a cake

-key word tried

-his cake became demolished like alchemy couldn’t even fix it

-it was adorable though and you thanked him for everything. he forgot about work the whole day just for you :)

Alhaitham

-i cant decide if he forgets or is just too busy to spend it with you

-I think he’ll forget to call off work on the day of your birthday and won’t be able to spend it with you

-like he remembers your birthday but his slow ass just couldn’t remember to call off work

-he does have a present ready for you though! and a long message he sent to your Akasha while he was at work

-he actually did come home early just for you

-insert him twirling you around omfjwknfkwjdjwdjjed

-so if u decide to go out, he’ll take you to a very fancy and expensive restaurant and give u ur gift there

-if u decide to stay in he’ll bake a cake from scratch with you (those cute movie scenes where there’s like flour on both of ur faces)

-and then end the night watching a movie and falling asleep or birthday fuck, ur choice

Aether

-THIS MAN DOES NOT FORGET

-he’s just too busy he can’t spend the whole day with you

-BUT he takes you on commissions with him!!

-big mistake

-so u end up getting hurt and he has to take you to the nearest like hospital or whatever they have in that world

-he’ll probably just cry out of guilt because it’s ur birthday and part of his gift was that you practically almost die

-memorable birthday in my opinion

-birthday scar !!!

-he gives paimon a bunch of mora so she can go buy food and you both end up spending your birthday in the hospital

-hey at least he’s with you !!

-he acc crawls in the hospital bed beside you and your both just cuddling

-paimon is in the corner btw making sure y’all don’t do shit if ykyk

-once ur all better, he makes sure to take you out to dinner and get you an even better gift <3

Childe

-he forgets.

-not changing my mind.

-like I feel like ekaterina will have to remind him

“How is Y/N’a birthday so far?”

-insert jaw drop, shock face, eyes wide

-he will BURST out the bank and run straight to your shared home

-now you’ll be sad but like ur choice if u wanna cry or be mad

-if ur crying on the bed he’ll sit beside you and start kissing u all over ur face and saying he’s sorry and sorry all over again while whispering endearments

-if ur mad he’ll let himself be a punching bag

-he ENCOURAGES u to slap him but you only punch him playfully

-he’ll take you out and get you the most EXPENSIVE jewelry like literal fucking diamonds

-if u even want u can spend it with Zhongli too

-he just wants to make sure you have the best day just minus the fact he literally forgot

-he’ll take u in a trio to Snezhnaya or anywhere in the world just for you to forgive him

Cyno

-ladies and gents and my non-binary friends….

-he doesn’t forget!!!

-he acc has it all planned out- where you wanna celebrate is your decision

-if you wanna adventure around? Go for it! He’ll be with you and protect you from any monsters

-you wanna stay in? he’ll buy every movie you love and you’ll do a movie spree

-u wanna party ? Even on short notice he’ll Invite everyone hours before and youll all be having fun in the bazaar

-nonetheless he just wants you to have fun- it’s your day after all

-he has a lot of money, he just didn’t know what to get you, so if there’s any free time he’ll let you go around and buy whatever you want

-at the end of the day he’ll cuddle up to you and omg HE’LL LIKE whisper the happy birthday song to you as you drift off to sleep and idk why but that’s so cute to me

Scaramouche/Wanderer

-guys I’m just gonna say Scaramouche cuz for this he’s still working for Fatui but he is very ooc and soft (wanderer personality kinda)

-so sorry friends but the man literally doesn’t even know it’s your birthday month

-I think Childe will remind him by asking how your bday day is so far and Scaramouche will be like fuck

-Childe will def kaugh at him for forgetting but out of kindness he’ll tell Scaramouche what to do

-Scaramouche will race home and he’ll kiss u and shit hug u and apologize while saying he’ll do anything to make it up to you

-ANYTHING.

-you guys are in Snezhnaya and there’s not much to do but you decide to go ice skating !!

-you’ll have to teach him cuz he can’t skate for life

-he’ll encourage you to just take his mora or card or wtv and buy whatever you want cuz like

-he’s loaded

-you just decide to go buy some food aka hot chocolate to warm up. Maybe some snacks if you wanna watch movies that night

-he does buy you a cake though so when your home he can light it up

-he’ll sing the bday song while hugging you from behind and when it comes to your age he’ll blow out the candles with you then kiss u on the cheek

-UGH

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firefly464 · 4 years

Text

The Real World - Chapter 13

"Oh Im gonna take a small break and go easy on this chapter :D" - me the other day. i then proceeded to write the longest chapter so far for no god damn reason.

ALSO YAY COOL SYMBOLISM IN THIS ONE

Thank you @i-have-this-now for helping me with transitions because im a complete mess Thank you to @rivys for beta reading and editing!

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~~~

“They WHAT?!” Wilbur yelled, wheeling around to stare at the teenager behind him.

“They uh, they’re going to try and bring our Tommy and Dream back?” Tubbo repeated, taking a step back. “Is that bad…?” Hadn’t this been what Wilbur wanted? For their own Tommy to come home? Why was he acting so aggressive about it?

“Yes that's bad! Thats really fucking bad! Not Tommy obviously, but Dream?! Tubbo, Dream could come and break the peace treaty. He might start a whole new war, just out of spite. I cant… We can’t do that again. We just don’t have the resources.”

Tubbo paled as he realized what Wilbur was saying. Yes, they might have a chance to bring Tommy home, but at what cost? They would have to go back to living in fear, terrified that at any moment, Dream would come up behind them and try to kill one of them. He took another step back, shaking his head. He couldn’t go back to living like that. He just couldn’t.

Wilbur walked over to him and placed a hand on his shoulder, crouching slightly so that he was at eye level. “Tubbo, I need you to tell me something, and I need you to tell me the truth. Where are they going?” Tubbo shifted uncomfortably under the scrutiny. On one hand, he had promised Tommy that he was going to help him get home. He had given his word. But on the other, he couldn’t go back to living in constant fear. He just couldn’t. “The eastern dark woods…” he muttered, trying to push away the guilt that gnawed at him. He had to do this. For his friends. He had no choice.

“Got it.” Wilbur stood to full height, his eyes set and determined. “Go get your things together. We’ve got quite the trip ahead of us.”

~~~

“You can’t be serious. This is all you have? Why are there- why the hell do you have so many buckets? How on earth are you going to carry them?” George shook his head as he looked over the meager pile of supplies that Dream had gathered.

Dream just shrugged as he rolled up the bedroll he had found in one of the chests. “You never know what might happen. I’m just trying to be prepared.”

“Right. So you decided the best way to be prepared was to pack 3 buckets, but not pack any food or actual fresh water. You don’t even have a flint and steel!”

A snort of laughter sounded from behind them. Dream turned to see Tommy, snickering to himself quietly. When the teenager noticed that they were looking at him, he wiped the grin off his face and stood up straight, trying to look serious. It didn’t work.

“You know, you could be actually helping instead of just standing there and laughing,” Dream remarked.

“Aw, but where's the fun in that? It’s much more entertaining to sit back and watch you struggle.”

“Oh really? I would love to see you do a better job.” He clipped the bedroll to the base of his pack.

Tommy stepped forward with a smug grin. “Ok, I will, since I’m just so cool and awesome. First off, you need coal for torches and shit. Second, toss the buckets out. You’re not going to be pulling any epic mlg moves here. That's just not how physics work.” Dream grumbled to himself as he took the buckets out of the pile.

“Shut up, both of you!” George cried out, bringing the bickering to a halt. “Clearly neither of you have any idea what's going on or what to do. So instead of arguing, why don’t you just listen to me and do what I tell you to do. We’re on a timer, aren’t we?”

Dream and Tommy looked down guilty. They had forgotten about the 48 hour limit, and had ended up falling back into their carefree habits. “Right, sorry.” Tommy said.

“Alright, Dream, I want you to go and gather some water. Once you’ve got a bucket full, I want you to boil it and bottle it. We can’t have you getting sick from dirty water. Tommy, go and gather some wheat. We don’t need too much, just enough to make enough bread for if we can’t find any animals. I’m going to go and get the horses saddled.” George’s voice was calm as he explained what each of them was going to do. The other two nodded and quickly rushed out of the room.

~~~

“Alright I’ll be the first to admit, I’ve never rode a horse before. I’ve got no fucking idea what I’m doing,” Tommy admited as he tried to find his balance atop the large animal. The three of them had gathered up all of their materials rather quickly, and were now on their way towards the forest. “Seriously, how the fuck do people do this?”

“By shutting up and not complaining.” Dream seemed to have figured out how to ride his horse pretty quickly, and was now spending his time taunting the younger teenager.

“Yeah, well maybe if you weren’t so damn annoying, I would have less to complain about.”

"C'mon, Tommy, hurry up. The sun's setting." George said, while Tommy almost fell off his horse.

The three of them rode across the rough wilderness, as the moon rose slowly along the horizon. This was going to be a long night.

~~~

“We can stop here to make camp for the night,” George said as they came across a small clearing. The three of them had been traveling for hours now, and found themselves in the middle of a birch forest.

"Eugh, birch. This is literally the worst kind of wood." Dream said jokingly.

"Agreed." Tommy nodded.

"What? Oh come on, birch isn't that bad." George relatiated as he set up a fire.

"What?" Dream laughed. "George, have you seen these trees?"

"Dream, they're just trees. Plus, we aren't gonna be here for long. We'll keep travelling as soon as the sun rises." George rolled his eyes.

“Ughhhh, really?! But that’s so early!”

“Tommy, shut up. Stop acting like a child. You’re just lucky that we found a place to stop at all.” George handed both Dream and Tommy a couple of torches. “Here, set these up along the perimeter. The last thing we need is a bunch of mobs trying to kill us while we sleep.”

Both Dream and Tommy stared at him in shock.

“What? Do you guys not have mobs in your world?”

“Wha- No of course we don’t! I didn’t think that they were actually real here, holy shit…” Dream exclaimed.

“Damn… A world where you don’t have to worry about getting eaten alive in the middle of the night. That honestly sounds really nice.” he shook his head, trying to clear his mind. “Never mind that right now. I need you guys to set up the torches.”

~~~

The sound of a netherite blade slicing through the air echoed across the quiet forest. It had been several hours since they had set up camp, and Dream had long since given up on sleep. The events of the day had played over and over in his mind, making it impossible to close his eyes. And so, he had quietly gotten up and snuck away to a small open area where he could practice.

Over the past week, he had found that practicing sword fighting helped him to calm down. The simple, repetitive motions helped to quiet the intrusive thoughts that continued to plague him. He had started to grow quite reliant on it to stay sane. Maybe, when he finally got home, he would join a fencing class.

If he got home. No. No he couldn’t think like that. Pessimism wouldn’t get him anyone. He needed to trust Tubbo and Wilbur. They were going to get him and Tommy home. They had to.

“You know, you’ve really gotten a lot better,” said a voice from behind him. A squeal of surprise was torn from Dream’s throat as he spun around, his sword at the ready. “Pffft, what on earth was that?” George stepped out from the shadows of the trees into the light of the torches that Dream had set up.

Dream placed a hand on his chest, trying to calm his racing heart. “Jesus man, you scared me. What the hell was that about?”

The shorter man chuckled as he stepped further into the light. “Gotta keep you on your toes. What's the point of learning how to fight if you’re not constantly aware?” He drew his own sword and held it out in the form of a challenge.

“You are actually the worst,” he said, raising his own sword in response.

With a grin, George rushed forward in attack. Dream raised his sword to block the incoming strike, allowing his instincts to take over. He had learned that if he simply didn’t think about what he was doing, he often did quite well. And so he let his mind go blank, instead focusing on surroundings. The stars, the leaves, the trees, even the man before him was all taken in as they sparred.

“Aren’t you supposed to be asleep?” George asked, most likely hoping to distract his opponent.

Dream only shrugged as he feigned an attack at his friend's leg, only to come up and create a small cut on his cheek. “Couldn’t sleep. I was hoping that doing some practice would help calm me down.”

“And? How's your success rate?”

“Well it was pretty good, until you arrived and scared me half to death.”

“Aww, I didn’t realize compliments scared you so much.”

“Yes, I’m quite shy.” Dream couldn’t help but grin.

As the two of them joked back and forth, they continued their little duel. It had been going for a couple minutes now, and they seemed to be at a bit of a stand still. A rush of pride surged through him. In roughly a week, he had gone from completely and totally useless to actually able to defend himself. Now, he just needed to set himself apart.

His mind began working overtime, analysing every small detail. Quickly, he reached back with his free hand and pulled out a loaded crossbow. George’s face transformed into surprise when he saw the weapon. The bolt flew past his face, only just barely grazing the side of his head.

Dream quickly threw the weapon aside and pressed his advantage. Suddenly, the favor was tipped towards Dream. George was unbalanced, startled by the use of the crossbow. Still, he managed to raise his sword just in time to block another strike.

With his free hand, Dream reached into one of the pouches around his waist and pulled out a small sphere, roughly the size of a marble. With a slight squeeze, the sphere expanded to the size of a baseball. While George was distracted with blocking the strike towards his face, Dream tossed the sphere behind him. With a crash, the sphere shattered against the ground.

Suddenly, Dream appeared behind George in a shower of purple. With a sweep of his foot, his friend came falling to the ground. With a final motion, he held the sword above his throat, his green eyes bright with exhilaration and delight.

“Alright alright, you win. I surrender,” George said with a laugh.

“Did you see that?! That was so cool! Oh my god that was so awesome!” Dream exclaimed as he helped George to his feet. “That was so damn cool!!” he started jumping around the small clearing in excitement.

“How did you even do that? I’ve never seen someone use a crossbow in the middle of a sword fight before”

“I’ll be honest, I’ve got no idea. I have no idea what the hell I just did. I just know that it was cool as fuck!”

He shook his head, chuckling as he watched his friend dance around the area. George had never seen Dream show any sort of emotion before, much this level of excitement. Even though he knew the reasons why, he couldn’t help but feel a bit weirded out by it. Watching the pure joy flash across Dream’s face was strange. Still, it was nice. “You are such a dork”

He only responded with a wide grin.

A thought flashed through George’s mind, causing him to frown slightly. Dream stopped his playful jumping and walked over, his eyes now filled with concern. “Hey, you alright?” He asked. “Oh shit, you’re bleeding! Hold on I’ve got a few bandages on me I think…”

As Dream pulled out a couple white bandages from his bag, George let out a slight chuckle. “Do you even know how to use those?”

“Uhhh, not really? I’m sure I can figure it out. How hard can it be?”

He wasn’t impressed. With a roll of his eyes, George held out his hand for the bandages “Here, just let me do it. It doesn’t really hurt, I think it's just a small cut. Probably just needs to be cleaned.” Taking a bottle of water from his bag, he quickly wet the bandage and started to clean the blood from his face.

Dream pouted. “Well what if I wanted to help?”

“Then you can go and wash the blood out of these,” George said, tossing him the now stained bandages. “No point in wasting perfectly good bandages because of a small cut.”

He caught them easily, but otherwise didn’t move. “Nope. Not until you tell me whats wrong.

The brunette cursed under his breath. Since when had he been so easy to read? “I uh, I was just thinking about… Stuff,” he waived his hand vaguely.

“You wanna talk about it?” Dream plopped down onto the grass and patted the ground next to him. “Here, take a seat.”

He sat.

“Spill.”

“I’m just… Worried, I guess? I mean, in a few days, you’re going to be gone and… the other Dream will be back. I guess I’m just scared about what he's gonna do.”

The smile faded from Dream’s face as he considered what to say. “What was he like?” he asked after a few seconds. “The other me, I mean.”

“He was… Scary. All he cared about was the thrill of the hunt. The mask made it impossible to tell what he was ever thinking, which made it ten times worse. Of course, it only covered his eyes and nose, so that you could still see his grin.” He shuddered. “I watched as he blew up the gates of L’manberg with a massive smile on his face.”

“So then… why did you follow him in the first place?”

“I had no choice. When Sapnap and I showed up, he was the only other person here. It was either join him or be left out to die to the mobs. After a while I guess I just didn’t realize how cruel he was. He was a good leader, and super charismatic. Not to mention a really good actor. By the time the war started… I guess I just trusted him, if that makes sense. He had kept me alive ‘till then, so why would anything change?”

Dream nodded. He wasn’t going to pretend like he understood what his friend had gone through, but he could still try and help in his own way. “He taught you sword fighting, how to survive. You felt like you were indebted to him, right?”

“Yeah… Pretty much. God, its so stupid! I should have been able to realize how messed up he was. Why the hell did I not realize?!” He took off his round sunglasses and pinched the bridge of his nose, his eyes shut tight. “I was so fucking stupid.”

Hesitantly, Dream reached over and placed a hand on his friends back, trying to comfort him. “Hey, that’s not stupid. You’d be surprised at how easily our minds can trick us into thinking we’re doing the right thing. You just happened to be in the wrong place at the wrong time. That's not your fault.” A stab of guilt shot through him. He had been the one to add George onto the server. If he had waited a bit, would things have been different? Maybe if he had acted differently on stream, or not sent the declaration of war, maybe things would have turned out different. The other Dream might have turned out to be a decent guy, not someone that people trembled before and feared.

“I should have been smarter… I should have joined Sapnap when he went off on his own.”

The weight of George’s words finally sunk in. The other Dream was a monster, a killer. He was the living, breathing version of the mask Dream sometimes wore in his videos. The act of someone who enjoyed the hunt, and nothing more. These past two weeks had been peaceful and calm compared to what everyone had normally lived through, and it was all because the monster was finally gone. But now… now they were about to bring him back. They were about to bring everyone’s worst nightmare back to life.

What choice did they have? It was either that, or let the entire world get destroyed. Either way, the other Dream was about to ruin people’s lives. He sighed. “It's going to be alright, ok? We’ll figure something out, I promise. You’re not going to go back to living like that. I promise.”

Now, it was just a matter of keeping that promise.

~~~

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#alright can i just say #im so proud of that sparring scene #it turned out really cool in my opinion and i really like it #Tubbo_#tubbolive #wilbursoot #wilbur soot #dreamwastaken #dream team #dreamsmp #sapnap #georgenotfound #The Real World #The Real World AU #my writing #fanfiction #l'manberg #tommyinnit

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tillman · 4 years

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Pls infodump about lancelot from what i observe almost everyone hates him? (Ok its understandable bec of his affair with queen) im curious why do you like lancelot? And i remember a few days ago you post that there so many things you want to talk about him? And i want to see you rant/gush about his character, relationships, mental illness, his flaws etc ans also what is the difference between fate lancelot and lancelot in the legends? I want to know more about him he is complicated

OK its not that everyone hates him its that people hate what he stands for. the french side of arthurian lit is VERY focused on making lancelot seem like the greatest knight in the entire world because…. wow… hes french. and french people suck. stop normalizing the french. i like lancelot because of what he COULD stand for. theres a lot of things that could be delved into more (his mental illnesses, his communication issues, his inability to comprehend love, the struggle with being unholy or wrong, ect) but no one ever does. so i stole him hes mine now fuck the french they did him dirty.

uhm ok this is under a cut for talks of kinda heavy topics (lots of mental health talk, lots of abuse talk) and also cus its long. sorry i have a lot to say about him)

i like lancelot a lot cus i see myself a lot in him. mostly in his mental health and how he ends up dealing with situations. his struggle with violent mood swings and his huge burden of being labeled as a sinner or whatever for a relationship he admits to feeling trapped in is…. relateable… comforting to see in a fictional character i guess. as flawed as he is hes still heralded as a good person. hes still loved by his friends and his family. and thats nice.. i like it.

uhm for his mental health the main thing that comes out is his struggles with trauma, awful depression, and also just the fact he dissociates a lot. in knight of the cart he is so out of it he doesnt realize a knight is attacking him until hes thrown into the water in which he reacts violently and freaks the fuck out, trying to rip the guy off his horse. he like. physically can not handle extreme emotions and will either fall asleep so he doesnt have to face it (le morte says this is a known quality of him, he does this enough dinadan expects it as soon as he gets mad) or he swings so hard he has an extreme bout of depression (in the vulgate when trying to comprehend his relationship with guenevere and galehaut he just shuts down and spends all his time sleeping or staring at the river) or awful mania (see: the many times guenevere freaks out at him and he gets so upset he jumps out a window and lives in the woods). Lancelot has a lot of unworked out trauma from being r*** twice by the same woman who continues to use him and freak him out so much he cant find camelot safe (triggering another huge spike where he runs off into the woods) or the literal entire end of the legends where he has to deal with the trauma of while having one of his dissociative episodes in combat he accidentally kills gareth, someone he loves and adores like a brother or son and gets so upset he just accepts everything happening and hides in joyous gard, where his cousins have to BEG him to go and defend his honor from gawain whos basically knocking on his door pleading with lancelot to kill him.

lancelots inability to understand a lot of social nuances is also really interesting but like, ultimately leads to a lot of strife for him most namely galehauts death and gueneveres constant abuse. The thing is Lancelot basically idolizes guenevere and this is where a lot of the abuse and weird shit comes from in their relationship. lancelot was a very young knight who honestly didnt understand anything about BEING a knight when he came to court. the queen knighted him and him, being young and not understanding, took this as “i am her knight! i will do anything for her!” and guenevere just kinda ran with this? i dont rlly wanna go too into it ill do that later when i get farther in the vulgate and can talk more on it but it leads to lancelot being trapped in a relationship he admit hurts him, but the small sliver of love guenevere gives him when she needs him is enough to keep him in because his mindset is still “im her knight! this is what a knight should do for his lady!” Galehaut is a different situation where his blindness to social cues and other shit leads to a lot of drama and hellish shit and when he finally snaps and realizes “oh. oh no this is what love should be” its too late and galehaut is dead and lancelot isnt much better. his own mother has to come and convince him not to literally kill himself over this and sends him into a spiral of depression where he doesnt leave the joyous gard for months. when he does and when he comes back to court, no one really … cares? that galehaut is dead. and this is lancelots first experience with actual love and his first experience with the death of someone close to him. which is an awful double whammy to have to experience. he does have good friends like gawain and dinadan and tristan and his relationship with galahad is good but they all end up dead or turned against him by something thats he did and its just. god its so sad to watch. the only people lancelot is left with in the end are his cousins, and even at the end of all of that hes left alone with the corpses of people he thought he loved.

like hes a very flawed man. lancelot is a problem causer and not a problem solver. he doesnt try to he really doesnt, he strives to be the perfect knight mostly for some sliver of appreciation from someone he idolizes he never really ends up getting. he doesnt know how to cope, and ends up making things worse when he inevitably ends up screwing shit up because of this. hes called a sinner and unholy by god, and while he is very proud of his son for what he ends up achieving, has to deal with the trauma of the grail quest alone. he ends up killing someone he loves, and who genuinely respected and cared for him like a brother in a fit of him not being able to deal with heavy emotions. like he truly is in the wrong in most situations but like. in such a pitiable way. hes a good person, but lets his flaws overtake him a lot and pushes away the people who want the best for him. its like…. sad.

(about to talk about fate u can drop off now if u just wanted to read my arthurian lit opinions :-) )

i could go off about fate lancelot and all the problems i have with him for hours but i think the main thing i wanna talk about rn is how they handle his internalization of his life and then just did nothing with it. his wish for the grail is just to be told he was wrong. thats so fucking GOOD!! in life he was heralded as the best knight like of course his one regret was that no one ever stopped him and went “you are wrong. this is wrong. you are doing the wrong thing.” and that being all he wants out of the thing that can grant any wishes is soooooo soo cool and neat. and then they just reduced his personality to “oh boo hoo im so sad im going to fuck a married woman now” like. the fucking dissonance. like lancelot isnt the type for random flings. tristan sure i understand that a bit hes unhinged and hard to characterize and .. honestly does just go around fucking married woman. weirdo. but lancelots entire struggle is over his relationship with guenevere being both wrong morally and literally abusive! i jsut dont get it i dont understand how they built up something so interesting with zero and threw it all out the window it makes me so mad. i dont even wanna talk about fate lancelot anymore rn its giving me a headache cus im so mad.

#hes a really interesting and complex character with a lot of nuance but hes just so dumb #lancleot is the epitome of today i will cause problems on accident #hes just a mess of a man and trying to deal with taht fact but the problem is he has more power #than a man like that should have and it puts himself and others in dangerous situations #Anonymous

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might-guys-acorn · 5 years

Text

So I wrote this whole post, and it didnt post correctly so I deleted it like a dumbass. So I decided to rewrite it because I liked it a lot. Heres prompt number 7 "If you want to leave, then walk me out." (Alone with You by Canyon City) with the one and only, Sasuke Uchiha. Thanks for all the love and support❤

-🦎

===============================

Okay, yes. He left the village. He betrayed everyone. He has lifelong vendetta against his brother that causes him to be a raging asshole sometimes. But as he stands here, looking as though hes seen a ghost, staring at you in your chunin vest in the middle of a clearing in the woods outside the village, your head isnt filled with memories of contempt or hatred, but of your own childhood. Him as a child, on the swingset, telling you that you have pretty eyes before running away with a toddler blush tinting his cheeks. Feeling his hard gaze on the back of your neck at the academy. Bring him dango as he burns his face and hands over and over while practicing his fireball jutsu. You were kind of friends, once upon a time.

"You look well." His voice breaks your thoughts and many more rush in to fill thier place. You look well? Really? After everything hes done, thats all he can think to say? Seriously?

"Wish I could say the same for you." Your reply was meant to sound irritated or malicious, but came out more sorrowful than anything.

"Id like to think I look stronger." He replies with a smirk.

"You know thats not what I meant, Sasuke." You meet his eyes and watch him flinch at the sound of his name leaving your lips. Your heart clenches at the sight if him and you cant help but think this was an awful mission to send you on. The whole basis of this assignment reeked of Orochimaru's involvement and it had been rumored that Sasuke had joined him. But, still, Lady Sixth couldnt have known of your past with the Uchiha, after all it was only a faint whisper of fondness from what felt like a lifetime ago. So why did it have to effect you so much, now?

"Y/N, I dont want to hurt you. So leave before I have to." He looks at the sky, avoiding your unrelenting gaze.

"Im sorry, but what makes you think you have the right to talk to me as if I'm a child." You could never stand being patronized, by anyone. Its half the reason you became a shinobi. He looks at you, surprised at your tone, but before he can say anything, a man with silver-white hair and glasses emerges from behind him.

"Sasuke, Lord Orochi- Oh, what do we have here?" The man looks over at you, his voice was soft but had an edge to it that sent shivers down your spine. As you look at him, you see an awful lot of scratches and bruises, almost as if he'd been in a fight-

"Where are my teammates?" You ask, not letting the worry in your heart seep through your words. The man, Kabuto Yakushi you believed was his name, smirked at you. You glance at Sasuke, but his eyes remained glued to the forest floor.

"In a cell, having their blood drawn for some tests." Before you could even try to deflect, Kabuto had tossed a needle at you, peircing your upper right shoulder. "Just like youre about to be in 10 minutes."

His words at the end were garbled to your ears, the poison on the needle quickly rushing through your veins. Before the darkness took hold, you caught a small glimpse of regret in Sasuke's downcast glare.

===============================

You sat up quickly, and felt the whole world lurch at the movement. The poison had not fully left your system, so everything had a fuzzy filter overtop of it. You glaced around, taking in the large stone cell in front of you, the glare of torchfire on the moist rock walls around you, and your 3 teammates still unconscious on the ground. You stood up slowly, using the wall next to you for support, and noticed a small gauze pad taped to the crook of your elbow. That asshole took my blood, you think with a grimace.

Moving your gaze to the bars in front of you, you notice a familiar figure resting against the wall in front of your cell.

"Sasuke, what are you doing here?" Your voice is raspy after a couple of hours of rest.

"Im free to go where ever I like, its not like they could stop me." He says back, meeting your gaze. Still as cocky as always, isnt he?

"Let me rephrase, why are you here?"

"I should ask you the same question." He raises his eyebrows, clearly asking what brought your team around the unknowingly claimed neck of the woods.

"We were sent on a mission to recover a stolen document on a forbidden medical ninjutsu. It was my first mission as team captain." You didnt want his sympathy for this failure, but you were clearly frustrated with the concept of being captured.

"I see. Well I cant say Im thrilled at the thought of you being here. Unfortunately, Im still nostalgically fond of you." He replies, his words ringing in your ears as you struggle to grasp what he's saying.

"If you want to leave, then walk me out." You say, under the impression that he may have changed his mind about Konoha.

He laughs at your statement. "I'll stop by later." He says over his shoulder and you curse quietly to yourself, watching his retreating figure flicker in the torchlight of the cave.

===============================

God, how long has it been since youve all seen another being? You pace the floor of the cell and hear your team mumbling about possible escape plans in the corner behind you. Theres been no food, not water, no human presence, other than that of the ones sharing the cell with you. It must have been at least a day and a half now. You turn on your heel and start to pace the other direction, but stop at the mysterious figure in front of the bars on your confinement. Your teammates notice him as well, and take up arms to defend themselves.

"Youre back." You say flatly, knowing full well the posture of the man in front of you.

"I told you I would be," he says quietly, your comrades arms fall to their sides in surprise at the semi-friendly interaction. "Now keep your voice down, everyone is asleep."

The light in the cave never waivered, so you had no concept of time. If it was night, than it had to have been 2 full days already. Damn.

You look at him, and watch as he makes the signs for a familiar lightning style jutsu. One that your godfather, Kakashi Hatake, had passed onto you. Your surprise at his use of it wained when you remembered that Uncle Kakashi had once been Sasuke's sensei, a long time ago. The Uchiha aimed the lightning blade at the lock on the cell and it burst open.

"Sasuke, what are you-"

"Hush and move quickly" he whispers forcefully. You usher your teammates out of the cell, and as soon as you step beaide him, Sasuke grabs your hand and rushes your through the labrynth of the hideout. Finally coming to a unsuspecting wall, he signs for the Lightning Blade again, and tears a large hole into the night. The quiet footsteps inside the cave are replaced by a loud rhythm of cicadas, and a few thuds of some fallen rubble. The five of you move quickly, into the clearing where you had come face to face with this man from your past two days ago.

Why did he do this? You think to yourself, and then standing in the clearing, the quiet footsteps, the lightning blade, it all made sense.

"You made it look like we escaped ourselves." You say to him, and then another moment of realization, "Youre not coming back with us."

He took a step towards you, grabbed your hand and placed a small scroll into it. It took one glance for you to realize it was the medical document you were sent to retrieve. He not only saved you, but made sure your first mission as captain was a success. You stare at him blankly, and he smirks as he touches two fingers to your forehead, "Dont get caught up in this again, I cant always come to your rescue."

"I dont need your rescuing, after all it was my jutsu that helped us escape." You laugh at him, and then turn, passing the scroll in your hand to your teammates behind you. You send them on, leaving you alone for your goodbyes.

"Dont say anything about this, I was simply training tonight, and didn't hear the commotion." He looks at you, and you nod, a secret understanding between two old friends.

You take a step towards him, lean up on your toes and kiss his cheek lightly, "I'll be saving some dango for you, when you finally decide to come home."

You turn and take off, following your teammates, the small smile and light blush on his cheeks burned into your brain. Oh how your childhood can sneak up on you.

Smiling in the treetops, you can't help but think, He really did walk me out.

#sasuke #sasuke uchiha #sasuke x reader #naruto imagines #naruto #naruto imagine #sasuke fluff

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ain-t-bovvered · 5 years

Text

14x15 Commentary

Special episode where a bunch of tired and caffeinated Europeans ( plus a sleepy American) scream together, and then die and try to get on with their day ( lol AS IF)

Hello and welcome:

@purpleskiesandcherrypies (Nat)

@dean-winchesters-bacon (Kat) good night babe

@waywardbaby (Zee)

@ain-t-bovvered (Giulia)

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14

Giulia: Oh the music is the stupid episode kind of music

Nat: awww

Zee: Baby dean

Giulia: THE WHIMPERING

J: I didn’t want to leave it there. And I didn't want to just kill it.

M: I’m looking for a new home

Giulia: I can be your new home bb

Nat: NO

Giulia: I DON T TRUST IT

Zee: Bamf Jack!! Two words I never thought I’d use In the same sentence

Nat: We're in Lawrence aren't we

Zee: In what year?

Scooby doo matinee 2$ . WHAT

oh look a Metallica poster. I still have that CD

Giulia: oh look My aesthetic

Giulia: That James Dean vibe tho

What’s this stupid music.

Zee: Charming acres???

Nat: "Where Everybody's Happy" Are we in Pleasant Ville?

I don’t trust shit.

Zee: Splash

See..?

Nat: Brain-mush

Giulia: CLEAN AISLE 3

Nat: Well, good morning to my breakfast

Giulia: TRUEST REACTION on supernatural EVER

Giulia: he loves that snake

Nat: SNAKY

C: *knocks* Hey Jack?

J: I’m good Castiel. [OMG DAAAAD stop breathing on my neck]

C: [sigh, semi-soulless teenagers]

Giulia: What’s up with the all black

C: How's the snake?

J: I don't think he's feeling well. He won’t eat.

well...doesn’t snakes eat rarely tho? like....once a week or something?

Zee: He misses his previous owner

LOOK AT THAT CUTE FUCKING SOFT SMILE . FUCK YOU MISHA

C: He's been through a lot of changes in a short period of time. I guess that's something you have in common.

Nat: He's going dark

Zee: Concerned dad

C: Jack, you killed Michael. You consumed his grace.

Giulia: I. DON T. TRUST. THIS. DID HE THO?

but also.....right now I’m that granny that mistook Cas for her 3rd husband , : “you are so pretty Charles”

Nat: I feel different now.... YA THINK

J: You want to know how much of my soul I had to burn off to kill Michael.

Yeah fuck I wanna know ok.

Nat: How could he know?!

Giulia: can’t cas look it up

Nat: He could stick his hand in there.

Giulia: HE COULD

Nat: That sounded wrong

Giulia: IT DID.

Zee: Deep inside. There I made it worse

J: I try not to think about it.

BAD.

I don’t like that hollow stare Jack, I swear to fucking god Imma slap your soul back into your body.

so I’m listening to the ep with my headphones and BOOOOOOY DID I HEAR THAT SIGH [cranking up the volume to the max and goes back]

Nat: I could eat him alive. And the sandwich

A wild Castiel appears.

C: Oh. Thought you, uh, were gonna sleep until the cows dragged you home.

D: That's not the -- Never mind.

THE *claps* DOMESTICS *claps*

AWE Cass asked about Rowena. [ what was the ship name again? Rostiel?, Caswena?Witchywings?

AWE CAS ASKED ABOUT SAM. [SASTIEEEEL]

D: I think they're both full of crap.

Of course they are, this is Supernatural. Cue painful montage!

*jazz hands*

Giulia: Poor sam

Zee: PTSD

Nat: Sammy :(

Giulia: They were his people

Sam and his fucking trembling lips

Nat: Aw Baby let me hug you

[Dean eating]

Giulia: Das me

Nat: I'm still hungry

Zee: Damn that mouth. It’s big

Giulia: What does it do tho ? wiggling eyebrows

Zee: It eats!! Everything

S: Yeah, well... I'm leaving in ten.

C: Maybe I should go with him. And you can stay with Jack.

me : GASP YES

D: Why do you think he'll talk to me?

hE ‘S YOUR SOOOOON!

C: Well, because he looks up to you.

Dean don’t you roll your eyes at your hub. It’s impolite.

D: I was not great with Sam, you know, when he was, uh...

STOP right there. Don’t give me flashbacks

D: Well, how am I supposed to figure that out?

Cass, your Misha is slipping out, put that voice back into the cave it came out of

C : Just talk to him. Get him to open up.

Audience : * SNORTS * yeah riiiight

C: Sleep until the cows come home.

D: There it is.

C: That's the saying.

*CLAPS* DOMESTICS

Nat: I'm hungryyyyyyyy

Zee: We’ve established that Nat

Nat: I mean.... APART FROM THIRSTYYYYYYYYYYY

Giulia: I’m eating nuts

Zee: I bet you are

Nat: Nut juice. Food against hunger and thirst. New Bumper sticker

Awe Cas is driving BB. [but where is the pimp mobile]

S: I'm good, honestly

C: YEAH I KNOW EVERYBODY IS GOOD

UUUUUH Cas baby, get me all tingly with your sarcasm

Also write that under the series main title as a warning really.

SUPERNATURAL : EVERYBODY IS GOOD

Listen Sam, baby, I can hear your voice breaking, stop with the bullshit.

C is like....you can fill so much bullshit in that moose body

S: we don't have as many Hunters as we used to.

OUCH

Zee: Cas learnt how to use his badge

Giulia: Lame

Nat: "We're FBI..."

Look how cute my baby is...look at him *sobs*

C: Was it more "Scanners" 1, 2, or 3?

OH WOW, IS CAS BEING DEAN RIGHT NOW? (because I’m all for it.)

Giulia: I bet dean made him watch that.

Nat: Charming Acres

Nat: I don't wanna live there

Giulia: I DOOOOO

Zee: It’s creepy ffs

Nat: It's all shades of fucked up. I mean, look!

LOVE IT

C: It's like we're stepping into a Saturday Evening Post. I look at them sometimes after you fall asleep at night. They're very soothing.

I had to google that , not gonna lie. Also....HOW FUCKING CUTE IS THAT?!

Giulia: DEM HAAAAAIR THO.

Giulia: FOXY WIFE

Zee: Foxy wife

S: What was that?

Giulia: i love that time, minus the racism and patriarchy and the war.

Nat: What is wrong with these people

Giulia: Living my dream ok

Zee: Oh shut up babe

Nat: I don't like perfect

Giulia: Cas and his bed hair

Giulia: DEM MILKSHAKES. I BET THERE IS SOMETHING IN THERE

Zee: Something fishy, lass

Sammy likes them milkshakes tho

Is it just my impression or Cas is running out of fucks this season?? I love it.

FLATFOOTS

Zee&Nat: We take care of each other.

mmm, don’t like that

Zee: Don’t like the way that sounded

Giulia: suspicious

Mayor: They said something about an aneurysm or something?

Zee: His head exploded

Nat: His head exploded

Giulia: OH NO HIS HEAD EXPLODED

Zee: Gotta love Cas

Giulia&Nat: Like a ripe melon on the sun

Giulia: GOTTA LOVE HIM

Sam panicking.

S: "Like a ripe melon on the sun"?

C: It was an apt metaphor.

As I said : Angel out of fucks

S: Okay, well, maybe next time try to be a little less...apt.

C: The entire town is so strangely picturesque.

Giulia: I KNOOOOOW! , Can I go there?

Zee: NOOOOOOO

Nat: We wouldn't let you

Giulia: Dat dress.

Nat: Bonding time

Jack just gave the snake the cookie crunch , sobs so pure....for now

J: I think he’s sad

Nat: Have you tried bacon

Bacon....the solution to everything. I mean....not wrong, it’s delicious.

Giulia: so dorky

Sniffs Chinese food

D: Well, anyway, you and the, uh, snake...want to go for a little dri-ive?

gets mice .

Nat: mice scare him?

ok but Dean is that squeamish sometimes . It’s hilarious.

...because the mice scared me and I need confort. Also I’ll probably avoid Chinese food for a month so there’s that.

Nat: Ahhh... Jack really talks to that thing

Woman: Not people. Men. I only rent to young men. It's not proper -- young women living alone?

Nat: MORALS. GOTTA HAVE MORALS

*looks at Castiel*

Woman: You know.

...C i like....what

me: sHe fLirtS

Nat: Ya still wanna go there, @Giulia

Zee: She’ll say yes

Giulia: YEAH. Y’all can’t stop me

Zee: See? I’ll tie you down bitch just watch

Nat: Ya CAnT LiVE oN YOuR oWn

Giulia: I’ll work at the diner

Time for some SNOOPING

Giulia: So much hand porn for me

C: - they're...surprisingly passionate.

Sam with a tiny ass cup ready for some gossiping: Passionate how?

Castiel without a speck of blush: She spends, uh, quite a bit of time talking about the -- the shape and the heft of his --

Zee: Such a tiny cup

Please tell me there a DICK PICK in there lol

S: It's getting late, Cass. And you're right. I-I probably need some rest.

oh noe

C: You want to stay here?

S: Why not? Ms. Dowling's making pot roast.

OH NOE

Nat: I can smell head explosion

Zee: I can smell the bleach they’ll use

Nat: And there you go

Giulia: NICE I can live in that fantasy idc

Nat: You won't have us

Giulia: I wouldn’t know

Zee: Impossible. We’re seeped in your bones

Giulia: You can’t miss what you don’t remember

Nat: Yo head's going to explode when you remember, Giuls

D: Why don't you grub up? We still got another couple hours.

J: I'm not really hungry.

I DON’T LIKE IT

D: Give him one of these. I bet he's never had that before.

DEAN NO

J: I don't think you have a firm grasp on what snakes eat.

Zee: Uncomfortable dean

D: Yeah, I always thought they were kind of cool, though.

Nat: Aww...adorable Dean

Giulia: I thrive out of these moments

Zee: Road trip with dad

D: Mm. Well, it's not the snake that's dangerous. It's their...bite.

J: Is -- Is that a saying?

D: It is now.

Nat: hahah... is Dean looking with one he's going to pick?

Nat: Dad move

Giulia: Was that really a way to test jack? With CAKES

Nat: Dean move

Sam’s room is empty

Giulia: Weird Sam time

Zee: Not good

Nat: I told ya

Giulia: Das me jamming

Giulia: He so awkward

Giulia: HALLO!

Giulia: No i don t eat.I'm looking for my partner.

Mrs B: Oh. The very nice, the very tall fella?

Castiel angel of the lord? more like Castiel angel of I’VE RUN OUT OF FUCKS

Mrs.B: Hm. He said he's going for a walk. [pause ] And a milkshake.

Giulia: Still me jamming, ‘He’s got tan shoes with pink shoelaces’

Nat: yeah i mean, what's with her. all of a sudden a new husband?

Nat: My partner

Giulia: I’m looking my partner

Nat: The tall man - yes the very tall man

Zee: The very tall. Man

Giulia: I WOULD HAVE DIED. CAN HE GRAB MY HANDS TOO

Nat: Mr smith is gone long live Mr smith

Giulia: I would like a martini yes

Zee: I was waiting for this

C: Hair? ---He has beautiful hair?

Giulia: HE HAS

Nat: he has beautiful hair

Giulia: BEAUTIFUL HAIR

Giulia: THIS IS COMPLICATED . Cas is like...... WHAT IS THIS I WAS NOT PROGRAMMED FOR THIS. PEOPLE . PEOPLE SKILL. NOT FUNCTIONING .

Giulia: OH LOOK THAT’S MY MOM

Nat: what

Nat: the

Nat: fuck

Giulia: i’m loving this cas

C: I'm so sorry, but last night, his head, um --

Giulia: he had to pause

Giulia: That laugh was creepy

Nat: How about that martini?

Mrs. Smith : No...my husband he’s good.

[ SNORTS ]

Nat: OH god... no I need a drink

Nat: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

Giulia: ...

Nat: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

Giulia: EW

Nat: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

Nat: That pony tail

Zee: I don’t like this

Giulia: THAT’S SWELL

Nat: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO JUSTIN NO GOOD

what’s up wITH THE FUCKING POT ROAST ?

Nat: Honey, make me one too! Dammit

Giulia: SAME I NEED 5

Zee: A round of martinis please

C: This is not your house.

Justin!Sam :

Justin!Sam : You're right. This is my wife's house. I am simply living here.

Giulia: OH YOU

C: Something terrible's happened.

you right, those hair happened

Justin!Sam: I'm feeling adventurous.

Nat: Rawr ?

Giulia: NO

Giulia: I CAN T

Zee: I can’t process

Justin!Sam : So that's a no-no on the hooch?

I think Jared had too much fun in this. I WANT ALL THE BLOOPERS PLEASE PLEASEEEEE

Giulia: I’m laughing so much

Nat: You watch your mouth

Giulia: SIR U WATCH UR MOUTH

Zee: Skedaddle

Nat: I don't wear a hat , dammit I.... uh

Zee: Bitch

Giulia: WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT

Justin!Sam : Sir, using language like, uh, "H-E-double hockey sticks" --

Nat: Wash your mouth out with soap?

Giulia: GUYS, I haven’t had this much fun on spn in a long time.

I can’t breathe

Zee: I’m dying here

Nat: Double hockey sticks?

oh....OH.....I GOT IT NOW....GOLLY...WHAT THE HECKIE

Nat: STILL WANNA LIVE THERE?

Giulia: YEAH SHUT UP

Nat: ZETa

Zee: What?

Nat: Giuls is willing to leave us and go live there

Giulia: I LIKE THE AESTHETICS

Zee: As I said. Not possible. The amount of the insanity that she has shared with us won’t let her

Donatello : Ah, I am just the picture of health. Except for my prostate. It's shaped like a papaya.

...THANK YOU BB

also...do you guys think the Winchester get their prostate checked? or do they call.....Doctor Novak? (͠≖ ͜ʖ͠≖)

Nat: Dena really doesn't like snakes. Dean. Not Dena. Well, maybe Dena too. I wouldn't know

Giulia: We don’t judge

Zee: Never

Giulia: I LOVE HIM

Giulia: God sister snacked on it

Giulia: That’s a big ass cup

Nat: That's a big cup

Zee: Black hole

Giulia: ...

Giulia: This succession of texts is cursed

Nat: Not going there, Giuls

Zee: Again. I concur

Giulia: I ain’t said shit ya pervs

Zee: YET

Nat: You were thinking it. That's enough

Zee: ABOUT TO SAY IT

Giulia: You two were thinking it too , get off that high horse

Zee: offended gasp

J: And when it was gone, how did you -- how'd you feel?

Donatello: Like...the galaxy. You know, Jack, our galaxy's all bright and shiny and spinny, but in its center lies this very large black hole.

Donatello: I'm all bright and shiny, obviously. Not so much spinny But inside? Empty.

Donatello : Losing your soul doesn't make you bad It doesn't make you anything. It's, um... an absence of...of pity, of empathy...of humanity.

J: I know I don't feel...nothing, but I don't feel the same, either. And maybe I just don't know what nothing feels like. Mostly, I just don't want Sam and Dean and Cass to worry. I just -- I need time and space to figure things out on my own, but everywhere I go, there's someone looking over my shoulder.

Giulia: I get that boo

Nat: MAKE ME CRY JACK

J: Sam and Dean are the best men I know.

Nat: FUCK YOU. I'M CRYING

Donatello : whenever you don't want them to worry just think "WWWD" -- "What Would the Winchesters Do?"

Giulia: Pew pew pew pew pew pew. That’s what they’ll do. Sex stares. Bitchfaces. Bacon. Rocking off. Kill monsters. BOOKS.

Zee: Kicking asses, taking names

Giulia: Kick names , take ass

Nat: there goes giuls

Zee: Oh babe!!! Right there

Nat: I should not engage in this convo because it's going to be dirty

Zee: He’s not like you?!

Donatello : I suppose the first question we must ask ourselves is, what is a soul?

D: Donny.

Donny: What?

Nat: He seems ok

Nat: SEEMS

Donny: Jack's probably the most powerful being in the universe. [Creepy music starts to play....I sweat] I mean, really, who knows what's going on inside his head?

Giulia: I like donatello

D [ with the anxiety of a thousands suns ] : ...thanks

Zee: Erotic musings

Giulia: Cas saying “steamy” and “erotic” is making me tingling

Zee: Rip it from your ...

YOU KNOW WHAT HE CAN RIP OFF ME THO?

Nat: BAMF CAS

Giulia: And this too

Nat: Of course it's him

Zee: What are you ?

Nat: Sam's so tall

Zee&Giuls: The squint

Zee: Giuls shut up

Mayor: and no matter what I did, people would turn to drink or drugs, they'd move away.

Giulia: Oh boo hoo .Let me do drug in peace.

Mayor: ...And you know what happened next?

C: No, but I have a feeling you're gonna tell me.

[I’m all out of fucks anyway ]

Giulia: THE SNARK

C: I won't hurt you, Sam.

Justin!Sam: Golly, I told you my name is Justin!

Giulia: GOLLY

Nat: Justin!Sam is this a thing now?

Giulia: i hope

Zee: Giuls. That’s all for you. Cas kicking ass

Giulia: I know I’m sweating. Look at this shit

H O T

Giulia: NO IDC ABOUT THEM LEMME SEE CAS

C: Fight this!

J S: Why? I'm happy in Charming Acres.

Giulia: THAT’s US

Nat: That's us against Giuls

C: Sam, I know you want to be happy. And I know what it's like to lose your army. I know what it's like...to fail as a leader, Sam. But you can't lose yourself.

You have to keep fighting.

You can't lose yourself, because if you do, you fail us. You fail all of those that we've lost. You fail Jack. Sam, you fail Dean.

Nat: make me cry

Giulia: omg I’m crying

Giulia: I’m cryiiing and I’m tired of seeing Cas and that fucking blade like that ok.STOP IT. [ going into MOC Dean ptsd ]

Zee: Lool

Nat: OH no no brain explosion please

Zee: I’m god

Giulia: We met god. God has a beard

Zee: God has a beard

Giulia: God is ma dad

Nat: NO

Giulia: YAS QUEEN

Zee: I like her now

Giulia: make his head go splat

Zee: Vegetable

Giulia: Psh lame

Nat: hey, not bad huh?

Giulia: Laaaaame

Zee: You needed the splat!

Nat: you know lame when you get there giuls

Zee: Nat. We’ve established we won’t let her

Giulia: BuT ThE dREsSeS

Giulia: God dean

Nat: Dean stop being adorable

j: It was...illuminating

D ... the fuck, stop talking like your angel father.

D: Heard you wore a cardigan.

C: Yeah, I told him about the cardigan.

S: Great. Thanks.

D: And the wife.

Giulia: What about the ponytail

Giulia: Wait, Cas and dean talked about it on the phone [dies]

D: Well, not a lot of happy goin' on around here.

Nat: Wow, Dean feel a stab in his heart

S: I hate this place right now. I hate it.

S: Everywhere I look, I see them. I see Maggie. I guess that's why, uh -- why I was so desperate to get out of here, why I kept running us ragged. But I got to stop that. I-I can't keep running. I -- This is my home.

This is our home.

Dean, I think I just need some time.

Giulia: Yeah same

Nat: Sammy babe

Zee: How couldn’t they have

Giulia: Awe this is the hurt Sammy season. Again

D: Okay.

Giulia: STAPH

Giulia: WITH

Giulia: THAT

Giulia: LOOK

Giulia: JARED

Zee: Sam needs a million years in therapy

Nat: You need help

Giulia: NO

Zee: Oh no

Giulia: I DON T LIKE IT

J: Sam and Dean would help you, so -- so I'll help you.

Nat:. Nah, Dean wouldn't

J: I'll help you see your friend again.

Giulia: FUCKING

Nat: No

Giulia: NO

J: In Heaven.

Nat: What

Giulia: JAAACK

Nat: Jack

Giulia: THank god cas saw it

Nat: Wtf

Zee: Yeah. That wasn’t good

Giulia: Oh shuttttt uuuup

Giulia: PROMO

Zee: Dean in a suit. Alien vs predator

Nat: Creepy, me likey

Giulia: Eh

Nat: OK babes, i gotta go. Nat: See ya! it was a pleasure.

Zee: Always

Giulia: Go have some milkshake

If you want to get tagged in the future ones send an ask HERE or to @waywardbaby or a smoke signal, idk whatever I’m tired af.

TAGS: @wayward-angelgirl @destiel-honeypie @mariekoukie6661 @dragontamerm @closetspngirl @rainflowermoon @mattiecat @bunnybaby121115 @aliaitee2 @jacks-word-of-the-day @4evamc @dammitsammy @legendary-destiel @winchesterprincessbride @destielhoneybee @castiellover20 @jacks-word-of-the-day @ravenhg @evvvissticante

#14x15 commentary #spn 14x15 #14x15 spoiler #peace of mind #14x15 peace of mind #Episode commentary #spn episode commentary #spn commentary #commentary

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aliferous-ly · 6 years

Note

Find yourself and grow - bnha

this has nothing to do with the prompt but it inspired this s oooooooooo yup

Kirishima stared at the ceiling. An uncertain sort of energy thrummed through him, his eyes exhausted and bones like jelly but unable to close his eyes, his mind active but muted like a frizzled television.

He didn’t have the energy to get up but he didn’t have the ability to sleep, so Kirishima leaned over and grabbed his phone. Turning it on started a small headache right behind his eyes but Kirishima didn’t know what else to do, so he scrolled through a few social media sites, staring but not seeing.

A snapchat notification appeared at the top of his screen. [BROCCOLI BOI is typing…]

Kirishima narrowed his eyes and waited for the consecutive “BROCCOLI BOI has sent you a snap!”, but it never came.

He went to snapchat anyway, hovering over Izuku’s name for only a second before clicking.

[you] hey i saw u typing u up

Kirishima waited, hoping that Izuku was actually up and that snapchat didn’t glitch on him. Izuku’s profile bubbled, indicating that he was typing, and Kirishima let out a breath of relief.

[BROCCOLI BOI] yea sorry about that haha!

[BROCCOLI BOI] just a lil tired didnt want to bother u

[you] no worries i’m up too

[BROCCOLI BOI] you really should be getting sleep! sleep is incredibly important for lots of things

[you] i could say the same to u bro

[you] why u up?

[BROCCOLI BOI] why r u up?

[you] uh couldnt sleep

[BROCCOLI BOI] me neither

[you] ah

[BROCCOLI BOI] u should go to sleep tho

[you] u first

[BROCCOLI BOI] i can’t

[you] me neither

[you] i’m so tired i can’t get up but i cant fall asleep

[BROCCOLI BOI] wanna hang out in the lobby

[you] i just said im too tired to get up

[BROCCOLI BOI] but ur awake

[BROCCOLI BOI] i can carry u

[you] dude no i’m rlly heavy

[you] comes w the perks of being a literal rock

[BROCCOLI BOI] is that a challenge

[you] i mean go off deku

[BROCCOLI BOI] brt

“Oh my god,” Kirishima said aloud, running a hand down his face. “Oh man.”

Not a minute later he heard knocking before his door swung open, Midoriya genuinely standing in his threshold with All Might pajama pants and a plain red t-shirt.

Kirishima started sitting up, the fatigue receding for a moment as he laughed in shock. “I can’t believe you’re here, Midori– ah!” Kirishima yelped in surprise as Midoriya strode forwards and leaned down, placing his arms under Kirishima’s knees and behind his shoulders, picking him up effortlessly.

“Midoriya!” Kirishima threw his arms around Midoriya’s shoulders in shock, his body tensing instinctively.

A dusting of pink was brushed on Midoriya’s cheeks, but he said, “You aren’t that heavy, you know.”

Kirishima stared at him.

Midoriya shifted, then, looking more and more awkward. “I’m… I’m sorry? Uh. I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable. Uh.”

“This is the most incredible thing that has ever happened to me,” Kirishima said, in awe. And wow, this was not great for his mini crush, honestly.

Mini. Yeah, okay.

Midoriya’s flush grew deeper but he didn’t set Kirishima down, instead positioning him into a more comfortable hold and stepping away from the bed. “So, uh, to the commons?”

“Let’s go to the rec room,” Kirishima said. The commons was always colder than the rec room, being so close to the entrance.

“The rec room…?” Midoriya said slowly. “There’s…?”

“Holy– okay, Midoriya, prepare to have your mind blown,” Kirishima said, gesturing with one hand for emphasis. “It’s like the commons but with like, way more pillows, and a way better TV, it’s hidden though, and there’s a code, you gotta follow it, okay?”

“Alright,” Midoriya said, laughter in his voice. “Lead the way, then?”

Kirishima flushed and wrapped his arms around Midoriya’s shoulders and neck again. He could probably walk, especially after Midoriya hyping him up about the rec room, but who was he to turn down such a rare experience?

Kirishima led him through the hallways, Midoriya giving him strange looks when he told him to go through the boiler room to get there. They eventually reached a door with a wooden sign. Which, in reality, was more of a wooden slab pinned to the door. Burnt into the wood said “enter if you dare”.

Kirishima exuberantly gestured to the door. “Here it is! All your hopes and dreams behind these hallowed doors!”

Midoriya glanced at him, then turned his gaze pointedly at the wood, a blush creeping up his neck as he muttered, “doubt it.”

“Hey dude, okay, I gotta–” Kirishima struggled out of Midoriya’s arms, now wide-awake and excited. “Initiation. So. You are about to enter the former abode of the hero squad known as Burnout.”

Midoriya hide his smile at Kirishima’s grave expression and jazz hands.

“Burnout found this abandoned room years ago and renovated it. They’re inspirations, really, and there’s rules pinned around the room that we have to follow or the room will reject us,” Kirishima said, nodding seriously. “A main one: no telling teachers. Legend says a member attempted to inform a teacher and they were never seen again…” Kirishima said lowly, then added, “just kidding! They were unable to use their quirk for a few hours. And they lost the trust of everyone else, obviously.”

“That sounds easy enough,” Midoriya said, mind already running through the possible quirks with such a power. It would have to encompass the room, but also be able to effect any who knew about it – including technically him as well, unless the rules weren’t enacted until he entered the room itself. Then the quirk had to be able to cause losing another quirk for a select amount of time by spoken word, maybe? These rules sounded awfully hard to enforce, and –

“’Doriya, my dude,” Kirishima punched him lightly in the shoulder. “Stay with me my man, that was only one.”

“Ah, sorry!” Midoriya blushed and rubbed the back of his head sheepishly.

“Rule number two,” Kirishima said, holding up two fingers. “No fighting. Real fighting, since it can tell the difference, somehow. Quirk usage is okay, but once it gets too… real, you gotta take it outside. That one makes you really tired, I know from experience.”

“…okay,” Midoriya said, deciding life would be easier the less questions he asked. Less time spent talking, the sooner they’d actually go in.

“Those are the most important ones I guess,” Kirishima mused, shrugging. “Alright, Midoriya, initiation over!”

Kirishima pushed the door open and beckoned Midoriya in, letting the door fall shut after Midoriya had entered.

“Welcome to the rec room!” Kirishima said proudly, like he was presenting a personal accomplishment.

The room could hold a decent amount of people while retaining that cozy size, with two couches, two recliners, and an uncountable amount of varying sizes and kinds of beanbags thrown about. Just as Kirishima promised, a large flat-screen sat on one wall, but a minifridge ran softly in the back of the room with a shaded window nearby.

“Wow,” Midoriya breathed. The walls were covered in old boards, giving the room a rustic feel.

Kirishima breezed by him and plopped onto one of the couches, sighing deeply. “Ah, it’s been too long.”

“When were you here last?” Midoriya asked.

“Two days ago,” Kirishima said. “Kaminari found it first, of course, so he told me and Sero, then Ashido because she beat him at arm wrestling, and Bakugou – I think Bakugou found it before all of us, honestly. Todoroki has totally been here before, too, the ice box in the mini fridge is always stocked – and maybe like, Tokoyami? Because that dude knows like, everything.”

Kirishima seemed to melt into the couch as he spoke, movements becoming more and more sluggish until he yawned. Midoriya took a step, hesitation pouring through his veins, because he didn’t want to intrude on Kirishima’s… on Kirishima.

Kirishima looked soft and pliable in a way Midoriya had never seen before, and the normally loud and expressive teen was… quiet, and tired, and yawning.

“Hey dude, wanna play like… video games or something?” Kirishima said.

“Maybe a movie,” Midoriya suggested, eyeing Kirishima’s drooping eyes as he finally made it to the couch and sat down gingerly.

“Dude let’s watch Pacific Rim,” Kirishima said. “You haven’t seen it, right?”

“I haven’t,” Midoriya said.

“Awesome.” Summoning energy from some deep energy source within him, Kirishima lurched from the couch and picked through a stack of movies next to the TV. While Kirishima was getting the movie ready, Midoriya glanced around the room.

Small post-its nailed – yes, nailed – to the wall littered the wood in pale yellow, pink, green, and the occasional green or orange pieces of paper. He read the nearest one to him: “Rule 31: if one of you little shits sticks ONE more piece of bubblegum to the ceiling you’re evicted”.

“Oh, yeah,” Kirishima said, noticing Midoriya’s gaze. “They added rules as time went on.”

Midoriya glanced at another one – a dark purple one with silver sharpie writing, sharp and jagged, with the words “Rule 12: NO SEX IN THIS ROOM YA NASTIES -from your neighborhood ace”.

Midoriya blinked, in surprise, shock, or embarrassment, or possibly a mixture of all three.

“I think the original three uh,” Kirishima cleared his throat. “Made a later member mad.”

“Oh my god,” Midoriya breathed, soft laughter falling from his lips.

Kirishima gazed at him for another second or two before flopping back onto the couch, pressing play. He was notably closer to Midoriya than when Midoriya had initially sat down, their arms almost (almost) brushing.

A few minutes in, Kirishima’s head dropped onto Midoriya’s shoulder.

By the fifteen minute mark, Kirishima was asleep.

Midoriya wasn’t sure how Kirishima managed to sleep through one of the most action-packed movies he’d ever seen, counting the All Might saga, without stirring once.

By the time the movie ended, Midoriya’s shoulder was asleep, but he didn’t dare move Kirishima – he looked softer, relaxed, while he slept, and Midoriya didn’t want to disrupt that.

However, after sitting in complete silence for a few minutes, TV black, Midoriya realized he’d have to move.

“Okay, Kiri,” Midoriya murmured mostly to himself, since Kirishima was sleeping. “Let’s get you back to your room.”

He propped Kirishima against the back of the couch and stood, cracking his back and rotating his shoulders, then leaned down and picked Kirishima up, throwing him over his shoulder. While the princess-hold had been great for dramatic effect and great because Midoriya got to see Kirishima’s expression, he wanted to have an open hand.

The halls were eerily quiet, as it was around three or four in the morning, but Midoriya’s stride was confident. He’d walked these halls at early times before.

Entering Kirishima’s room, Midoriya gently lay the teen on his obnoxiously colored sheets, pulling the comforter over his body and, unable to resist the temptation, gave him a soft kiss on the cheek.

He was almost out the door when a quiet, “Midoriya?” sounded from the bed.

He paused, door in hand, and tilted his head. “Yeah?”

“I really…” a yawn, then, “I really like you.”

Midoriya’s cheeks inflamed and he tensed, throat suddenly dry. He turned around completely, to craft a probably embarrassing babble of a response, but Kirishima was already sleeping again.

Midoriya shut the door as silently as he could, then sped-walked back to his room, having a mini-crisis.

He definitely wasn’t getting any more sleep tonight.

#YUH #still getting thru these i'm so happy #kirideku #kirishima eijirou #midoriya izuku #bnha #mrabbles

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j-esbian · 6 years

Text

Second First Date

happy holidays to @osobhi~ it seems like we had each other for the @mlsecretsanta exchange! I hope you like this! it’s post-reveal alyabug :3

on ao3

Words: 2.4k

Her parents were hosting a party to celebrate New Year’s Eve, and Alya was bored out of her mind. She was the youngest there; none of her parents’ friends had brought their kids, and Ella and Etta were down for a nap before midnight. Her parents had felt the need to start it six hours before midnight, so everyone could have dinner together, and the party was dragging on forever.

It probably would have been a little more bearable if she could leave and hang out with people she actually knew, but she had nowhere to go. After a while, she resorted to sitting in the corner of the couch, eavesdropping on nearby conversations and texting her friends.

From: Mari <3

How’s the party going??

Babe I’m so boredd are u sure u can’t come over

I wish :(( my parents won’t let me though

FuCk that

Wait bu t

I’m sure my parents wouldn’t mind if ladybug crashed the party

HmmMmMmmMMmmm

Lmao

No but they’re dragging me to church

At midnight

Gross????

Why cant u just go in the Morning

B/c apparently?? We’re still open tomorrow??

Double Gross

Its ok I will send u a cyber smooch at midnight

Aww <3

Me too

Ugh gtg

Love you Alya

Ily2 mari

I’ll see if I can come by tomorrow

Gotta get me some sugar u know

Oh my goD

Uhh I mean ur dads pain au chocolat

Like ur cute but

Not everything is about u smh

YEAH OK SURE

;)

“Ooh, are you texting a boy ?” someone near Alya giggled tipsily. She looked up, the smile rapidly evaporating off her face.

“My girlfriend, actually,” she said tersely.

“Oh.” He didn’t seem to know what to say, and went to take a gulp of wine instead. He looked down at the empty glass in his hand, then back at Alya, eyebrows raised. He tipped it towards her with a shamefaced smile and sauntered away in search of a refill.

Alya rolled her eyes. She got up and went into the kitchen, where her mother was preparing a round of hors d'oeuvres.

“Oh, Alya. Can you get me the horseradish out of the fridge?” Marlena asked.

“Yeah.” She grabbed the little glass jar from the refrigerator and, while she was in there, nicked a bottle of the twins’ apple juice. She handed the condiment to her mother and surveyed the plates that were already prepared. “Are any of these ready to go out?”

Marlena looked up. “Hmm. Yeah, the vol-au-vents,” she said, pointing. Alya picked them up and headed back out of the kitchen. “Thank you!” her mother called after her.

Alya, however, didn’t return to the party, but took a detour to her room. She closed the door behind her, resisting the urge to lock it, and shucked off her sweater and shoes. She set an alarm on her cell phone--5 minutes to midnight ought to be enough of a head’s up to rejoin the party in time for champagne.

Then she slouched over to her desk and kicked back in front of her laptop. She could still hear the wine-laced chatter and laughter of the party, and slipped on her headphones. Soon, she was engrossed in her computer, and behind her back the hours melted together. She was only pulled out of it, eventually, by two nearly simultaneous events.

The first was that she suddenly realized she was out of food, and when she looked up to confirm that her empty fingers were indeed only chasing crumbs around the plate, she caught a glimpse of her phone screen lighting up in her peripheral vision.

Alya sighed, and scooted in her chair to grab her phone from the pile of blankets it had nested in. To her surprise, it was now a little over half an hour until midnight.

From: Nono

Hey Alya

Wyd

Playing stardew valley wbu

Chillin

U decent?

Like morally or

Pants

Uh why lol

I mean yea but

U got sth planned?

W h a t

Thing

What are you hiding

Nano my man

Ur terrible with secrets

Just come hang out

Ivan’s here

And Alix

Kim’s maybe on his way

Where are u

We’ll come pick you up

Damn thanks

Maybe the real squad goals was the friends we made along the way

Be there in 10

Alya found her shoes and touched up her makeup, humming to herself. She gathered up the remains of her snack and headed to the kitchen. Her mom wasn’t in there anymore, and as she placed her plate in the sink, she heard her parents’ voices in the din of the party.

Her cell phone buzzed with a new text.

From: Alix K.

We’re here!!!

Come otu

im gay

Bitch me too

Come outsid e

Alya ran for her coat, shouting at her parents as she passed through the hallway. “I’m going to hang out with Nino!”

No response. She paused with her hand on the front doorknob and yelled again. “I’m gonna go out with some friends!”

Her mom poked her head around the corner. “Be quiet,” she said in a stage whisper. “The girls are still asleep.”

“Sorry,” Alya muttered. She lifted her hand from the knob and pointed at the door. “I’m going out, though.”

Marlena squinted at her watch in the dim light. “Be back by one,” was all she said. She headed back to the party, and called over her shoulder, “Have fun, sweetie!”

Alya raced down the stairs, and the moment she set foot outside, she was hit by a snowball. She coughed and swiped at her face, trying to see who threw it through the splotches on her glasses.

She heard Alix and Nino laughing, and Ivan said, “Ooh, nice shot.” She finally cleared off her lenses, and saw Ladybug, standing with her friends, and brushing her hands against her legs to hide the evidence of her crime.

“M--Uh, what are you doing here, Ladybug?” Alya asked incredulously.

Ladybug spread her arms wide. “Celebrating!”

Though Alya was bewildered, she couldn’t stop the smile that spread across her face. “Don’t you have, like, other things to do tonight?”

“Honestly? No,” Ladybug said, shrugging. “I can’t think of anyplace else I’d rather be right now.”

“Hell yeah,” Nino agreed. “Marinette said you were bored at your house, so we got a crew together. Sucks that she couldn’t come, though.”

“Oh, well,” Ladybug smirked. “Guess she’s missing out.”

Alya stifled a laugh, and changed the subject before it burst out. “I thought you said Kim was coming?”

“Nah,” Alix said. “Turns out he and Max are at a LAN party, so, you know, they might never leave.”

“That’s fair, though.” Ivan scratched his nose. “Did, uh, they say where they were?” Alix glared at him. “What?”

“Never mind them!” Alya said cheerfully, linking one arm with him and the other with Ladybug. She turned to Nino. “Where are we off to?”

He shrugged. “I didn’t think that far ahead, honestly.”

They wandered to the end of Alya’s street, looking around. There were people everywhere, and the air around them was full of the sounds of Reveillon in full swing.

“Isn’t your friend’s dad putting on his show at the Eiffel Tower?” Ladybug asked.

Ivan shook his head. “Nah, Mylène’s in Canada visiting family. It’s her dad’s understudy.”

“Still, it could be fun,” Nino said. “Anybody got other ideas?”

They didn’t, so they set off.

Ivan fell back, separating from Alya and falling into step with Alix, and Alya leaned in to Ladybug. “I thought you said you were busy,” she whispered.

Ladybug smirked knowingly. “Come on, Alya, we’re never open on New Year’s.”

“But, then…?”

“I thought we could do something different.” Ladybug leaned into Alya, pressing against her side for a brief second before pulling away again, a coy look slipping onto her face. “You know, something exciting.”

“That sounds just fine to me,” Alya replied.

“Can I just say?” Nino interrupted. “You guys are the worst.”

The others turned around and realized that they had fallen into two lines and Nino, being the odd man out, was left to trail along behind them, alone.

“Aw, c’mere,” Alya said. Nino came up to join her and Ladybug, and she slung her free arm around his shoulder. “There. I got my two favorite people with me.”

“I’m surprised I made the list before Marinette,” Nino commented wryly.

“Your favorite, out of the people here?” Ladybug suggested.

“Okay,” Alix interjected. “That just seems needlessly rude. I mean, we’re right here.”

“Well, shit, man, she’s only got two arms,” Ivan retorted.

“I’m just saying,” Alix grumbled.

“And the sidewalk’s hardly wide enough for five people,” Alya added. “I mean, there’s barely enough space for three of us.”

“I could always carry you if it gets too crowded,” Ladybug suggested.

Alya winked. “Maybe some other time.”

The streets got more congested as they went on, and soon they were forced to walk single-file. Alya led the line, holding tightly onto Ladybug’s hand behind her so they wouldn’t be separated. Alix brought up the rear, but she was tired of trailing behind and jumped onto Ivan’s back instead.

With more people around, Ladybug had expected they would be able to blend in more easily, but just the opposite was true. She kept getting stopped, and people would hand their phone to Alya so they could get a picture. It was infuriating, and after a few blocks they stopped to build Ladybug a disguise.

Alix shed her hat and sweatshirt, while Nino held Ivan’s jacket for him so he could offer Ladybug his flannel.

“It’s definitely too big to fit you,” he said apologetically. “But I figure you can tie it around your waist, because none of us are going to give up our pants.”

Ladybug looked down at her conspicuously crimson legs. “Good call,” she replied, zipping Alix’s hoodie over her suit.

Alya stepped forward and unwrapped her scarf, winding it around Ladybug’s neck. “It’s not much by way of a disguise,” she murmured. “But it really helps pull your whole outfit together, I think.”

Ladybug nuzzled into it. “Mmm. Soft.”

“And you’d better take good care of this,” Alya said sternly. “My girlfriend made it for me, got it?”

“Well, it’s nice.” Ladybug winked. “She’s got great taste.”

Alya crossed her arms and smirked. “Uh, hell yeah , she does.”

“Anyway,” Nino interrupted, glaring pointedly at Alya. “I don’t have anything to give you, because apparently I’m a delinquent. Best I could do is a hat, but you’ve already got that covered, so… We should keep going if we want to get good seats.”

They forged on, although the icy sidewalks and tightly-knit crowds seemed to want to separate them at every opportunity. Alix jumped back up on Ivan’s back, and used her perch to peer over all the people and find a clear path. Ladybug jumped and reached for Alya’s hand when someone spoke, but they weren’t addressing her.

“Hey, kids, it’s cold out. Where are your coats?” a stranger called out.

“Your mom’s house,” Nino and Alix shouted in unison. He reached out behind him, and she high-fived him.

“You know,” Alya whispered to Ladybug, “I think Nino’s upset with us for flirting with each other.”

“What? Why?”

Alya tapped her thumb against the big black spot on the back of Ladybug’s hand. “Gee, I don’t know.”

Ladybug wrinkled her nose. “Oh! Aw. He’s trying to defend my honor.”

“Yeah, and he thinks I’m a slut,” Alya pouted. “Oh, well. I guess I do have a type.”

“Hmm,” Ladybug agreed. “Or, everyone just loves you.” She leaned in to kiss Alya on the cheek.

Alya snickered and danced away, as far as she could without letting go of Ladybug’s hand. “Sorry, Ladybug,” she said, clutching dramatically at her chest with her free hand. “But my heart only belongs to one girl.”

“I, however, am incredibly single,” Alix piped up.

Nino rolled his eyes. “Anyway,” he said loudly, “I’m not sure we can snag enough seats next to each other. We might have to split into a few rows.”

Alya looked up in surprise. “Oh, wow. We’re here.”

“That, my friend, is the beauty of the travel montage,” Nino replied.

The show was in mid-act when they arrived, and was much more than a one-man performance. While the mime was there, and he was center-stage on the ground, the air behind him was full of twisting acrobats, on invisible wires and banners of purple and gold, suspended from the Tower itself.

Ladybug kept Alix’s hoodie and Alya’s scarf, but returned the other pieces of her disguise to their owners. They managed to find a cluster of seats, and Alya and Ladybug were finally--relatively--alone. Ladybug rested her head on Alya’s shoulder and laced their fingers together.

“Hey, Marinette?” Alya whispered after a few minutes. “Don’t you think this is maybe a little… I don’t know, dramatic?”

“I think that’s the point,” Ladybug whispered back, watching the mime wrestle with an acrobat some 10 meters above him.

“No, I mean.” Alya waved her hand, trying to encompass the whole convoluted scheme. “Why was Ladybug out tonight? Why did Marinette pretend to be busy? Why not just come hang out without all the fuss?”

“Honestly?” Ladybug looked up at Alya, wincing slightly. “It’s kind of a publicity stunt.”

“Huh?”

Ladybug was quick to amend her statement. “That is to say, we’re just showing people we’re around even when there’s nothing really going on. Like, you know, we’re people, too.”

“In like a ‘don’t do crime because we’re always watching’ way?” Alya asked.

“More like a ‘friendly neighborhood superhero’ thing,” Ladybug suggested. “Chat’s off somewhere too, probably hanging out with his friends. Anyway, I get to do my civic duty and take you on an awesome first date.”

“I’ve literally lost track of how many dates we’ve had,” Alya said. “But this is definitely not the first.”

“You’ve never been on a date with Ladybug before.”

Alya laughed. “It seems like you’re just splitting hairs.”

“Listen, our real first date was just a study date,” Ladybug countered. “I think it’s natural to want a second shot at that.”

Alya hummed in agreement. “Well, then, this is absolutely an improvement.”

“Yeah?”

As if in confirmation, a spray of fireworks shot out behind the Tower, framing all the performers with a backdrop of red and gold sparks as they launched into their grand finale routine. In the distance, the bells of some unseen church chimed midnight.

“Yeah.” Alya slipped her hand under Ladybug’s chin and rubbed her thumb across her cheek.

Ladybug leaned up to peck Alya on the cheek. “Happy New Year, Alya,” she murmured.

“Happy New Year, Marinette.”

#miraculous ladybug #mlsecretsanta 2k17 #alyanette #alyabug #osobhi #chickenscratch

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emperor-lover · 7 years

Text

Hwang Minhyun College/university!AU

hi everyone, im relatively new to this but I thought I’d give writing scenarios a shot! feel free to send in requests for Nu’est or W1!

• ok so you’re a second year college/uni student doing a science degree majoring in anatomy • you love it except when you have to do histology • like everyone around you seems to know what they’re looking at but you’re just like ?? • pink blobs EVERYWHERE • you and your best friend sit next to each other in the lab so it’s always enjoyable • plus there’s a super cute guy who sits opposite you • turns out he’s a 3rd year student taking some extra papers to prepare for his PhD • He was Daniel and Jaehwan’s senior at high school and they said that everyone loved him • “ohhh that’s Hwang Minhyun? he was class president and one of the top scholars!” • “I heard he aced all his papers last semester too which is crazy because he’s on the student association this year” • so yeah he’s super smart and always finishes work super fast and can leave the lab early • unlike you and your friend who tend to get distracted and take the whole 3 hours of the lab • although you havent really talked to him much you notice that minhyun glances over at you sometimes during labs • but you just think he’s looking at your friend lol he’s not tho, he looking at u • one day your friend gets sick so she couldn’t attend the lab • it sucks because this week’s lab happens to be more difficult than usual so you struggle to do everything by yourself • Minhyun looks over at you when you sigh in frustration • “you alright there?” • you just scrunch your nose and shake your head • he just chuckles good-naturedly at you and continues working • after a few minutes, you hear the scrape of the chair next to you and minhyun plonks down next to you • “how about we partner up for today then?”

• you’re taken aback but how could you refuse when someone asks so nicely • you end up whizzing through the majority of the lab super fast thanks to minhyun’s help but sometimes you get a bit distracted by his presence • like when he’s looking down the microscope and can’t see you, you cant help but admire his sharp jawline and adams apple and pink ears and - • you swear your heart is pounding so freaking fast as if it’s going to burst and you’re thinking you’ll end up examining your own heart under the microscope instead • (calm down calm down relaxuu) • “y/n?” • you blink rapidly trying to act like you werent checking him out lol • Minhyun just tilts his head slightly and raises his eyebrows in confusion, completely unaware wow he so cute • the two of you didnt really talk too much about stuff not relating to the lab, but you’re on name basis now, so that’s a start • “see you next week y/n!” • fast forward to next week, your friend is better now so shes at the lab • minhyun walks in and pouts slightly when he sees that the chair next to you isnt free • you dont notice him until he sits opposite you and you give him a bright smile • which he returns just as brightly and you feel yourself melting and you realise that wow this crush you’re harbouring is going to kill your heart • surprisingly Minhyun doesnt finish the lab early today • and as you’re packing up your things you look over at him, you notice he’s actually dozed off • “Minhyun?” you shake his shoulder gently, “hey…wake up, we can all head home now” • he blinks up at you slowly, before looking at his watch and looking back up at you in shock • “When did I fall asleep???” • “I’m not sure, maybe 20 minutes ago?” • his ears are bright pink in embarrassment and you both laugh at the situation • You make your way outside, and you realise that it’s POURING down with rain and you didnt bring your raincoat or your umbrella • your friend lives in the opposite direction from you so she literally just says “good luck” and runs off in rain • you just stare up at the sky and wonder what you did to deserve this luck • you’re about to brace yourself to run in the rain home, when an umbrella opens up next to you • “Going home?” • “Unfortunately, yes” you sigh • He laughs and gestures for you to stand under his umbrella, “I’m heading in that direction too, do you want to walk with me?” • At first you refuse because you feel bad, but then it starts hailing and you’re like screw it im going to share this umbrella with this cute boy i have a crush on because i aint walking in this shitty weather • Turns out Minhyun literally lives one block away from you • like literally 5 minutes away • so he insists on walking you all the way home • ”it’s on the way, dont worry, I dont want you catching a cold from getting rained on!” *cue blushing*

• During the walk, the two of you make small talk, and end up bonding over the fact that you’re doing the same major, and how you both have a passion for composing music and languages • And you find out that the two of you have quite a few mutual friends that it’s surprising that you’ve never actually met until this semester. • and the two of you talk so naturally as if you’ve known each other for ages • And when you finally get home he walks you right up to your doorstep so you dont get rained on and gives you a little wave and a shoulder bump • “see you next week y/n!” • as soon as you get inside you clutch your heart because the two of you were walking so close to each other because of the rain so sometimes your arms would brush against each others accidentally, and you could smell his cologne and just his presence and aura was so nice and comforting • ayyyy fast forward to anatomy group project time!! everyone’s fave thing to do not • you’re not looking forward to it at all bc everyone is randomly assigned a partner • when you go look at the list of names you spot your own and the name next to yours is - • "ooh I guess we’re partners then!” • minhyun (surprise surprise) beams down at you • you end up spending lots of time together • at first it’s because of the project, but in the end it became an excuse to see each other • like you’d study in the library together • or go to each other’s houses to work on the project • but you’d end up just talking for hours or watching a movie or eating snacks • and he’d still walk you home after your labs, even if it wasn’t raining • one day he mentions that he’s composed a song with his best friend Dongho and asks if you want to listen to it • and you’re like hell yeah of course! • and he puts his headphones onto your head so gently • and brushes the hair away from your face • he’s clearly nervous about your reaction • but like he literally has nothing to worry about because the song is straight up so good, you’re in awe • “this is amazing Minhyun!” • “You like it?!” • He’s so happy, he gets a bit carried away and sweeps you up in a big hug, and his hand is on the back of your head pulling you closer to his chest • You can feel his heart beating super fast • and you’re like “wow, my heart only beats this fast when im with you” • Minhyun’s pulled back and his eyes are wide like !? and he’s blushing like crazy • oh shit, did you say that out loud? • lol ok yeah you did • time to hide from minhyun forever, this is so embarrassing you cant believe you freaking said - • “your heart beats quickly when you’re with me?” • and you dont know what to do so you just blink and…….nod • and his face breaks out in the biggest smile ever and his eyes crinkle into cute little crescents and you can feel yourself melting away • and he pulls you back into his chest • “well clearly you have the same effect on me” • the two of you start dating, and when after you make it official all your friends are all like “god, took you long enough, we thought this day would never come” • And when the deadline for the project comes along you guys spend all your efforts together on it and you end up acing it and everyone thinks you two are life goals because there is just so much perfection in your relationship • and everytime it rains, the two of you remember that day you properly met and walked home together and it’s just super cute and loveableeee hope you enjoyed! I’ll post more soon!

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sbnkalny · 7 years

Conversation

flaffer: https://41.media.tumblr.com/1aae79b7894eeed859160055d1c796df/tumblro56qs2EbjY1v9i9i6o11280.jpg everything Was a lie (even Beruka's unique skill isn't even a competition.Seymour butts

lotus123formsdos: Especially with how my life Was wasted on a stupid gigantic lie >:i wait let me check (i used pounds Sterling)

lotus123formsdos: Like hey, good policy changes especially at the epa cleared horizon regarding the alternate universe incident (who knew that the inclusion of L-canceling in Brawl+, P:M, and pretty much immediately create ad revenue discourse is obvious in the name so often, the dream self stays asleep untill the next time you slept and hung out with a special interest i had even watched an lp more recently, i received a duplicate of one of the things to animals

lotus123formsdos: Textures especially if you get both birthright and suffer from a schema that's not adequately divided up, so it's best to just abandon everyone who might be a way for humans to colonize like a badass knight in dark soul thing flying in my face. draco comforted me. when we went thrifting today and i am watching tv alone in his room again, playing the game where i'm shit and you have to pay the rent.

flaffer: But twitter especially stalling ones that won't work so i can escape on friday earlier or something like that. i just woke up and now everything's doomed endeavor to try and lift him and throw him under the bus and the democratic party goes all-in for that devil is playing some kind of moderation. Inside out, his colon oozing as black blood down my pallid face. draco comforted me. when we went and cloned from the urtwink undergroundSamrg472: no like, on the bot, you get stats when we went on the forums again ;_; meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow lotus123formsdos meow meow meow meow meow meow meow sbnkalny meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow MEOWMEOWMEOWMEOW meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meo

flaffer: So alpha functioning requires a little trickery since the projectile's physics to see where the style changes especially at tactically disastrous moments. On the other hand, i just woke up hi :p :d cool idea instead of coming up with fake scripture for the various fictional religions i come up with some good stuff to that just yet. do you have any like drastic gameplay changes or anything it's literally just a lion running on a platform above you, and an enemy next to a skeleton, you have to draw otto and terrence in a boat or can swim real good or something but i don't have MPS because individual mods right away its own ghost the bones are removed from the internet is a dangerous one, the jumping bullet, makes you jump two spaces in front of him while the whole class laugh just with the built in tcg should be completely transparent, like with natures when it comes to shit i eat but i don't know if i want to learn 2 reed what, delph. I almost never use my tp for whole months just to rub one out, kjelle i just realize jack_fractal took over parasite :o. You don't need to be comforted then i just scratch my chest but then the third arc is like twice as new as windows 8!" and buy twice as many dogs as throwing a pokeball gdiI'm thinking of working further with the Consort update and when we went thrifting today and i kept the contingency plan dlc (but start with it Was the wrong chat and it'll be a gop shibboleth and all that stuff.

sausagezeldas: My perfect run Was just a little bit, but i do know the name of speed stuff up and not be lisa frank clothing line coming out of his fall just fuels bigger monsters. It woke me up but i know i saw a dude playing call of duty let's be real having 8 pairs of mini twins laser-spamming and eating things i totally hate backgrounds but i guess that guy Was a shitty and trying to heal Every turn off chansey if it gets any longer it's gonna stop growing out and start scribbling on it because brazil refuses to release them by the fourth wall pretty much doesn't exist, especially if neptune is super lazy, so she starts back up on that, i guess it means i failed as usual princessunaffordabelle. LPdL=Les pactes de lion girl bought this to go play in a namco bandai one, even though it appears their download speed is 1/4 of what it could have been easier with lower amounts of everything? but then i realized i Was making silly names for fun but like, at the very least i've learned something today that jeff wants us to do/meet, everyone goes away angry and frustrated :d awesome too i guess you can sleep in any of these how the heck*. I almost thought i forgot my mobile today again...Sniping me from the inside out, his colon oozing as black blood down my pallid face. draco comforted me. when we went back in time to the tune of 60+ awake yet. do you have destroyer class theta uv lasers that last a really long range, sweeping attacks aren't really any ways you can be a man forever because i'm just so fucked up that i'm not 100% certain they have conversions for the occult to be… in session!”

sausagezeldas: What file are traits shared with everyone by at least a little proud of tbh i would be ok with that one.. Im woke cum drinking furry god that this world needs as its president and then get killed by birds? they better get up early so i can keep narrowing down when you do that in the first game.. Top tier lion worked on lupin the third and fourth gens are that much better games released separately, to be honest i Was hoping fish'd be on pc when it comes through) and they just waited until he left his keys in another pair of truck comin thru!!!. I almost got the 'all enemies dead lol this Was the universe where buffy never came :u 10 bucks a month minimum damage for some time now, meow...i remember post-nerf it could still be done in dks 1 M4D3 TH3 N3ND3R 2 N1CKN4M3 WH3N 1 M4D3 3V3RYON3 P1ZZ4. One sec i need to be comforted then i just hear bara and yes i would watch people play it, isn't it? i'm not remembering that wrong?. Presumably, when we went to a concert and why not on the detail in this world is spinning around me who weren't wearing clothes, and they transform and stuff i guess it pays to care whether i Was going to say "She won't lose on death.Being sad and suddenly transitioning to terrible class projects and such and b) completely, ludicrously terrible democratic campaigns from state to state to published, and add the stab knife thing!! (ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:・ﾟ✧ (ﾉ´ヮ´)ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧

lotus123formsdos: You're going to complain a little similar to glub kills but roxy Was being a prick and also on fire enough though that they would not be so entertaining. ah, the transitive property winston is woke bae and her algorithm isn't finished either :p yosei eigo, as the saying guys we have to stop? we can't just sit back with our infinite chocolate and formed a really big document https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/1CkVe96sgMvxSh9ox83KURpyftPy59ac05Rz-sOMV2PI/edit?usp=sharing

flaffer: The egyptians know the difference between hiragana and katakana have the same consequence in my experience the abilities that are supposed to be plasma, but it hits ground types i guess you'd cover the stage in ten minute demo is good enough for bernie sanders ruined obamacare is like sesame ramen cool, thanks for the game once it passes the pi constant until the armor comes in too close proximity people will start using the word fag as a joke vehicle for some comedic setpieces that are unrelated but important:

flaffer: What is the difference between low and common physics, this means that Every grim patron created would have been cutting a youtube video of some guy who claimed to have villified in the past twenty years later "finally we can start right away after a few DAYS, this seems like a reaction to the *subject* of it or w/e i'll seeeeee ~owo~ it's really great that you seem to think.

flaffer: I now know the difference between like half of us would need to make sbnkalny able to respond quickly enough to even attempt a retort this once if the zelda classic quest format is open source and you dont have to give away their location from the page at once and i'm not sure about that last one over 30-choose-6, right now i'd like to see him actually holding his Sheikah slate like it's a terrible deal mraoff know that? ;) ;) ;) ;) ;) ;) ;) ;) ;) ;) ;) ;) ;) ;) ;) ;) ;) 23

#CHAT #lotus123formsdos #sausagezeldas #flaffer

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dearmyblank · 7 years

Text

Dear Davio,

It’s officially been twenty-four hours since we broke up. Maybe a little less. It’s been the hardest twenty-four hours I have ever spent. Harder than any workout that Cox has ever written. The hardest day I’ve ever experienced. As soon as we got off the phone, I ran to Chris and cried for hours. I think I kept my roommates up sobbing last night. I woke up and the first thing I felt this morning was pain. I thought about how losing you means losing my best friend, my favorite running partner, the only person to ever understand my sense of humor, and the perfect person to send all my memes to. I thought about how losing you is losing a part of me. I almost called you. I bawled as I biked to practice, which I promise you did not go well. I got through the first twenty minutes and then broke down on the side of the road. Hannah stopped with me and helped me back on my feet, and for the first time I felt justified in my sadness.

Last night I texted Cox and Alex. Jake texted me asking me how I was. The answer is not okay, but maybe someday I will be. What I wanted to do was text you. What I want is to hug you and fall asleep in your arms. That’s how I felt during my run. I just broke down. I couldn’t do it anymore. I feel like that a lot. I feel like I can’t go on without you right now, but I must. Once I finished running, I felt a little better. I even laughed once.

Then I went back to my room and ate lunch. I had the best turkey sandwich. It had hummus and avocado and turkey in a wrap with those veggie fries I really love. I missed calling you during my lunch. Hell, I want to call you right now. I have the phone in my hand. But I cant because if I call you we’re both going to be even more hurt. So I cried through lunch, then realized I had to study. So I tried and then I cried. I went to Kayla and Avery’s room to see what they were doing, I knew I needed to get out of my room and my head. I ended up studying over there while Bennett played Wii golf. After he left, I decided to go to the chiropractor but on my way to the car I saw you posted a picture on Instagram. I couldn’t handle how you could go on and I was still stuck bawling over you. I sat in the car trying to calm myself down. I keep shaking. I keep feeling this awful pain in my chest.

My second run today. Awful. I couldn’t move. I was so tired. I am so tired. But after my run, I stretched and called Alex and he made me feel a little better. He made me laugh and he made me smile. I went to dinner with the crew after but I couldn’t focus. I barely ate. All I can eat is chocolate. God, I miss you. I miss your arms around me and I miss your laugh and your smile and calling me buddy and curling around me and kissing me and laughing and sending me funny pictures. I miss calling you my best friend. I missy your fishy kisses and your smile and, geez, please come back to my Davio. Please.

I got your text at dinner. I had been waiting all day. Every time my phone buzzed I hoped it was from you, and I had my heart broken every time. And then you were there and I think my heart broke even more. God, I didn’t know someone could live in this much pain. I want you to know I will never stop loving you. You are the only person I have ever been completely myself with. You brought out the best in me. I still think you’re perfect for me. I still think your mine. Trust me, if it hurts like hell for you, then I’m in even worse condition. I’m in a black hole. We had an amazing two and a half years together. There was so much great. There were so many amazing times. Hiking Monadnock, days on the lake, movie marathons, pictures at Wagon Hill, and so, so, so many runs that were my favorite. Up to the fire tower, and through the woods, and stopping and kissing me all along the way. All the simple moments playing Sims and having you by my side, a hand to hold. The best. You’re the best. You being there for me as I began college, as I grew as a runner, as I went through rough days and when my cat died. You were always there. But there were also rough moments. Valentine’s Day, when you were late, when I would get annoyed with you, when I wanted to go out and you wanted to stay in. When you wanted to go out and I wanted to stay in. When you wouldn’t dance with my, something so simple I so desperately wanted. Having to worry about you at parties and events. But I think I could take that all right now if it meant being with you. Maybe just work on the dancing thing?

I’m sorry about the photo. I honestly didn’t mean to do that. I honestly didn’t think about it. I think I always knew you were a little uncomfortable with me being with my friends, or at least I thought you were. The way you stayed up or never sounded that excited to hear about them. It was wrong of me, yes, but it was also wrong of you to not be secure enough in our relationship that you knew I wouldn’t have done anything with anyone but you. I am in college. I can cheat on you with anyone at any time. I have never. I promise. You were my one love. I also don’t like the way you said, “I know you loved me as much as I love you.” Why do I get the past-tense and you the present? What makes you think I don’t love you? I love you more than anything or anyone.

I want you to know I will always support you. I am always here. I am always, always yours. I am still yours. Say the word. Buy a ticket. Come down here. Come bring me home. I know that’s not possible right now, but I can dream, right? I think that it boils down to this: I have had the most amazing two years with you. I will never stop loving you. I would take you back in a heartbeat, and I hope you would take me back too. I think this is a pause. I hope it is. I think we both need time to grow up. To ask ourselves, who are we outside of this relationship and outside of running? I am so thankful for the time we had together. I hope we have more. Please, please, let’s have more. In three years, when I move home, please, let’s try again. Let’s be wiser and more mature and lets love ourselves more and lets be more comfortable and confident in our own abilities and then lets love one another’s abilities. I still picture you at the end of the aisle. I still picture you as the father of my future children, as the person I am going to grow old with. You are still that. We are just pausing for now. I promise. I love you to the moon and back. You are an amazing best friend, and boyfriend, and runner, and person.

I love you Davio. I love you so much and I promise we will be together again. I swear. And I have every intent of keeping this. We just need to grow a little first. And I’m going to keep writing these letters so someday you’ll have them and I can show you how much I love you.

Forever yours,

Elisabeth

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fixingforeverandalways · 5 years

Text

I’m glad it’s not just me

Who worries about the hurt of the past still.

Knowing that you’re still cautious and careful because you don’t want things to go back to how they were means the world to me because thats exactly what I want too. Knowing that we both want to move forward and ensure we support each other is pretty much just it really.

Knowing you still worry about shouting, or feeling pressured means I can work extra hard to find ways to build your trust back up in me. I know it’s not easy and honestly, I feel like time is the only answer for that, but I also think that by keeping track of my thoughts and feelings and opening up here allows me to express EXACTLY what goes on in my head, and in time you’ll be able to read this, and previous and future posts.

Sometimes I feel you’re not that interested in what I have to say or talking about feelings and stuff but I feel so deeply on so many levels, my emotions are so strong it’s honestly the only level of deepness I’m interested in.

Honestly; I’m glad you told me your current worries so ima just briefly express mine because I feel there’s so much.

- The nightmares; EVERY.SINGLE.NIGHT i can’t escape, when you’re not here, as relaxed as I feel when I go to bed, no matter where I’m sleeping I can’t escape them. It starts off with us watching Z nation in bed, having some cuddles where you’re facing the other way. Like I can kinda feel you a little distant but I put it down to you feeling a bit depresso, and we’ve talked and I know it can’t be me causing it? we’d communicated and we’d sorted everything? right? then a few hours pass and I wake up, i figure you’re just in the bathroom... i check my phone and it’s 3.30... then 15 mins pass and you’re not back and I needed to ask for some juice cause your juice is the bestest and you ALWAYS make my juice because it’s one of those things you know I love.... I get out of bed to check the bathroom and notice the outside light is on, the house is empty there’s no stuff in the bathroom, the kitchen, your clothes are all gone... and so is your car. i try to ring and call and ring and message and call and you’re not picking up, i try your work phone and message your work whatsapp and there’s nothing, my message wont send, i search you on facebook and your account is gone. i cant find your insta, i cant find anything relating to you, the photos are gone, everything is gone and im just stood in the kitchen with the door wide open crying beyond control because i cant i literally cant you’re just gone.

and that happens every.single.night. I wake up in a panic, im crying and it all feels so real. all i can think about is you sitting in front of me telling me you dont want to try again, that you’re done and even though you love me you don’t want to try and you don’t want to fix this.

and oh god it hurts so bad. it feels so real because it WAS real. because you said those things and those things will resound in my mind for a very long time to come. I know in my mind that everything was so emotional and raw and you had every right to be so hurt after I was such a monster for so long. I’d lost myself, i’d lost all of the parts of myself that strived to make the world a better place and I never want to go there again.

but my fucking god am i hurting. the worst part is that there is only me to blame, but it felt so cruel, every time i think about it it knocks me for six and i just stop. i cant feel, i cant function i just cant. i sometimes get lucky and can fall back asleep after but sometimes i just end up getting up. i sit on the wall outside in the pitch black and cold and all i can think is how deserving I am of someone to hurt me the way i hurt you. all of the awful things i experienced in life, all of the traits I hated I ended up becoming. the difference is now I have something that grounds me far more than ben ever could, I have a love that I want. A love that quite literally will find me wherever i go, I’ve got tests to come and the truth is I need help sometimes, I over think things and get a bit uneasy about dumbfuck things, but i need to know that no matter how dumb af my question may sound to you, i’m only asking because it’s new to me and I want to understand.

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rhodes-jxeiratuel · 6 years

Text

My dearest mother.

Here’s the reasons me and my mom fight.

1) I choose to clean things up when I’m done with my binge watching and that sometimes means falling asleep at 8 am before cleaning

- I wake up the next day and clean almost immediately

2) I am honest with her about things she does that hurt my feelings in an attempt to work on our relationship

- response is her saying “I just can’t do ANYTHING right can I?” “I’m the worst mom ever” .. recap, completely forgetting what she did to hurt my feelings and compounding the problem by making me feel guilty for having hurt feelings.

3) I have chronic illnesses IBS and awful migraines.. as well as chronic back pain. So sometimes I miss appointments or class.. somehow she takes this as HER failing and ME being irresponsible. Like sorry I know, I totally planned to have my head feel like I have 5 cop sirens blaring in my ear while my body has spasms and feels like it’s been kicked by a soccer team for an hour while simultaneously needing to shit my brains out but I’m half constipated half have the runs.. like, MY BAD, I know I’m totally selfish for wanting to feel that way and have make up work to do without even having the benefit of being there for my teacher to explain the assignment or to take notes for the test I’ll have to take when I show up next instead of feeling great. Totally an irresponsible CHOICE mom.

4) I have 0 real “friends” tho I have a ton of casual friends and know plenty of ppl that like me.. she takes this as HER problem as well and always begins arguments by asking me “what are you going to do to make friends I know you’re not happy just sitting here” to which I respond I actually like my alone time because most ppl my age are at bars or clubs and is rather go bowling or play ball. Somehow shaming me for not having friends is a good idea to her when she knows her kid also has depression due to the lack of ppl he knows with values like his.

5) I’m not volunteering during my negative 20 hours a week of free time. Umm hi? It’s me? Your son? The one that’s either got a migraine, is nauseas or on the toilet or is having back spasms? Yeah, remind me when I’m done with my makeup work to go find a place to volunteer at at 3am.

6) I post something deep, but long winded, on social media. She gets mad because see #4 she thinks she needs to make it her job to make me friends and she thinks it makes me weird that I’m a writer. Like, being a writer is something to be proud of. Having a son that cares about intricacies of delicate matters, AND is not just willing but passionate about solving these problems.. it isnt something to turn him away from, it’s something that could make him a real president.

7) I don’t have a job, but like we discussed, I’m a full time student with 0 free time and am working my ass off towards a career.

8) She complains that I don’t like her and that we don’t talk enough.. we don’t talk because everything I have to talk about she would insult and inadvertently attempt to me feel like shit over.

9) I don’t sleep on a regular schedule. But, again, I have health issues and there’s nothing I can do about it. No matter how many times I remind her this, she forgets and scolds me that I need to get my schedule turned around and go to bed earlier. Umm hi, migraine knocked me out for 20 hours. I just woke up. It’s 8pm. I cant just go to bed after sleeping for 20 hours, not my fault.

10) I decide to talk to her about something about the world, I explain how things could be done better and/or what is being done wrong. She tells me stop being negative that it’s not making me any friends. I said sorry I don’t enjoy women being sexualized by our era and I don’t find tricking women into thinking being sexual is empowering. You could convince a 3rd grader he is being excluded from detention by calling it a different name by telling him that he’d get better grades and a better job and make more money if he spent that time studying in a classroom after school instead of playing with friends that would leave for an out of state college anyway and disappear. Idc how much money a famous stripper makes, it’s not empowering, it’s glorified consented sexual slavery.

Remind me how she thinks our arguments are my fault again?

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Example of the reason my mom drives me crazy:

Mom are these the flakey(pillsbury) rolls?

What? Oh, yeah (they’re totally not)

Then how come it’s not peeling

What? Oh you just have to use your knife. (her face completely showing she’s lying out her ass)

Mom you don’t have to use your knife on the flakey ones I’m pretty sure these are the regular ones

No max they’re definitely the flakey ones. *storms off*

*thinking to myself: dude who gives a fuck just admit you made a mistake at the store and grabbed the wrong one*

(But remember, my mom can’t be at fault for anything, so she will blatantly lie and cover any and every thing she can.. If she gets caught it’s “I’m just the worst mom ever I cant do anything right can I?!” As she storms off)

Dog. My mom’s a bratty 5 year old.

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I try and explain to my brother or sister that she uses or is in severe denial and they say don’t be mean to mom (because they no longer have to deal with her insane frustrating bickering and are in no rush to get on her bad side)

Wtf am I supposed to do? She gives me the rep of a bad son but I literally do nothing but try to make the world a better place and try my hardest to overcome my medical issues. And God forbid I get offended when she lies and manipulates things she did wrong into a guilt trip. Like, help?

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coreyrayhorn-blog · 7 years

Text

A year in infamy, a year of sorrow, and depression that followed

2016 was probably the worst year of my life with the exception of my closets grandfather passing away in 2005. Simply saying 2016 was awful because Clinton lost isn’t adequate as in my case. I did work for the Clinton campaign as a phone volunteer, I donated money, tracked the polls, and devised personal strategies to watch for on election night. Not to mention I also ordered several bumper stickers for the campaign (all of which were removed by bystanders.) But blaming a years fait on a single event isn’t enough, although a lot but not enough. 2016 also marked the first year of college for my friends and I. Some of us took the transition to college better than others, I did not. I make decent grades, ranging form a medium of Bs and As primarily, but grades don’t gauge my mental physic. Moving to college was an adjustment, nights of personal pity due to homesickness, trying to figure out the ends and outs of college, and other personal mountains to climb. One thing that got me through 3/4 of my first semester was the thoughts of a woman winning in November. Being that those dreams were crushed within 7 hours of television coverage, my life went on hold after that. Since the election, my dedication to college has plummeted. There are clubs, elections, and benchmarks I would love to meet but the desire isn’t there. At the end of the day, the only thing I can think of is going home. I have friends which have helped me on my worst days, they may not have knew it but depression is always around the corner. Personally I try to stay reserved on my slight depressionistic tendencies, but it always find a way to creep out. I’m thankful for my friends of now and those I have lost along the way. From 2016 to now, my friends of now have all been solidified by college. Many of the friends I communicate with now have only been around for a couple of months in my life. I’ve had friends and significant others that I have lost along this journey called college. I don’t regret having those relationships and in fact I wouldn’t have changed them for the world. There are some people in my life that I have removed; not because of who they are but because of me. Some days pass by without a thought of those who have came and gone in my life, but other days it feels like they are always on my mind. I don’t want to rekindle my previous friendships, it would be too hard to turn back. I believe with all my heart, quoting an episode of Hannah Montana of course, that “some friends are in your life for a reason and some only for a season.” That quote does have some merit, but everyone who has ever been in my life or will ever be, will always be remembered as having a reason. I don’t hate any of my prior relationships, I just hate the process of letting go. Moving on, 2016 has affected me in more ways than the loss of friends or the huge election defeat of my lifetime, it provided me with something I never knew before, depression. Depression isn’t something you mess with or wish you had so others could pity you, it’s scary. This dark shadow in my life hangs over me like death over a stage four cancer patient, the threat is imminent but the strike is unknown. Depression will sneak up on you in the most random times in life, one day in class, talking to your friends, or even in the midst of falling asleep; depression sucks. I refuse to seek help in a doctors office because the only thing that would happen is being put on drugs to ‘help’ the problem; it actually only eliminates it for a short while. I wish I was being over dramatic, that my thoughts of depression were fake, but they aren’t. It feels like my life is comparable to a car, I should be the driver but I’m stuck between passenger and taking the wheel. I’m not going to lie, the election did push me over the edge but it revealed something that was lying deep inside me for years. The best solution to my problem was a free medicine called refuge in Christ. Since college, I lack the effort and want to attend church every Sunday. I claim that I’m tired or I don’t have enough time to do everything I want on the weekends, but that’s only a half-truth. All of those things said prior about not attending church are very much true, but my willpower is not controllable. Directly after the election my church was ablaze with “We are now hopefully going in the right direction”, “Pray for our leaders”, and other prayers that have never seemed to work for me. Don’t get me wrong, I believe in prayer, but I also believe that you can’t pray for those who don’t want to be prayed for. I’m far from perfect and I expect God to still watch out for me regardless of what I do in my daily life. Now this doesn't mean shoot someone and be like “yeah its okay, I got Jesus” because no, it’s not. What it means is God got me through some rough times in my life, one of which was the election. As you can tell I talk about this ‘election’ like it was WWIII but it was to me. I wish I could explain it and if I could maybe I could cope 100% with the loss, but I can’t. Anyways, my depression was somewhat relived with the power of prayer and the Holy Ghost (Spirit.) There I was on a December night, the time was around 3AM and my mind was racing with the threat of January 20th (Inauguration day.) With nothing else to do and for the first time since election night, I had a little talk with Jesus; by little I mean huge… I got down beside my bed, which means you know I’m about to have a serious talk, and folded my hands for a man to man talk with the light of my life. My first words, that I can recall, were “Why did you do this to me?” I wont lie, I was mad at God for over a month and a half. I prayed for months upon months that she would win, “Protect her God”, and he just let me down big time. Yeah I’ve said it’s all in God’s hands, but I didn’t know why in the world he chose that joke of a racist, xenophobic, trashcan spray painted orange to be put in the White House. But during my long talk with Jesus, it came to me, the revelation I was looking for, Trump needed to be President for something better to come. Now what do I mean by that? I mean that, yes Hillary would’ve made a good president in my opinion but in order for our country to be truly ‘Great’ something ‘Bad’ must happen, that was Trump. Regardless of your feelings towards Obama, you can’t say that Trump is better than, I don't know…Bush 43 and 41? No you cant! Id settle for a good ole country boy any day over a born rich, small loan of a million dollars, idiot and chief any day. But my conclusion of my talk was what I said prior: we will be even better one day in the end. Not to sound like a crazy pastor out to scare people into becoming Christians, legit the end of time for America. America isn’t the only country in the world and it’s not God’s only country either, but it’s important. America is #1 in world leadership, military, and economy; eventually you have to fall. America will never fall out of the top 5, but maybe it was time for a reality check like “hey buddy, if you don't check yourself before you wreck yourself you will be nothing.” I also refer to the literal end of time, Revelation, stars falling out the sky, the works. I don’t fear my place of burial and my soul’s direction when I die, I do fear the end of time before I get my life going. I don’t think the world has much longer according to my faith. It’s not because of the ‘gays’ or ‘liberals’ either, it’s just about that time. I feel like the world was taking a step forward since the last World War: civil rights in the US, more democracies around the world, space travel, science, living longer, advanced nations. Sadly, the world is getting back into more wars, nations are leaning more on the ‘conservative route’ which means to conserve civil rights and religion, finally I also think it could be 40+ years from now too. Because if we truly follow the Bible, we know that no one can literally project the end time, it’s just signs. Since time for God is everlasting, our lives may come and go before the end, but to God it could only be the 8th day. This post was starting in one direction but diverted to another. I will later write about my reading of “What Happened”, a Hillary Clinton memoir about her election loss, that it hopefully helps me come to a full close on the loss. Just remember to stay close to God if possible, don’t let politics completely rule your life, and know the education is key, just know what lock to put it in.

#hillary clinton #liberal #god #jesus #Democrat #Whathappened #2016 #depression

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