#but i worry a little about just how it’ll affect me… and worst of all (unfortunately- in this society) my work…
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lmg omg omg:: idk if anyone has requested this ficlet or not but what about house hunting in saint albans with Less, finding the right house and then r and less just having a moment at the front door where Less just is quiet and looking at the interior r hugs her from behind and Less is a bit homesick and stuff but r invites tooney and joe round without less knowing to make her feel more at home
homesick. | Alessia Russo
“So.. what do you think? Is this the one?” You questioned excitedly as you wrapped your arms around Alessia from behind as she stood still, investigating once again with her eyes.
“I love it..” She sighed, leaning her head back on your shoulder before you pressed a kiss to her temple.
You had been at arsenal for a couple of seasons now, whereas your girlfriend had just moved, still trying to adjust to the reality of moving away from home.
You owned a small flat which you knew needed a lot of work done, however you contemplated moving instead of doing it up.
“Hey.. we are going to try and make it as homely as possible, okay? I know it’s hard but we’ll make it work.”
“It’s just, i’ve been gone for a week and it’s already hitting me and i don’t know how i can get rid of this feeling. As much as i love you and being with you, i miss manchester.” She let the tears spill as she let out her frustration, refusing to look at you as she pulled away. The reality hitting.
“I know and i won’t hold you against it, it’ll get better lessi, i promise. I don’t blame you.” You reassured, gently placing your fingers around her wrists to pull her hands away from her face.
You wiped your thumbs across her cheeks and muttered sweet nothings as you leant your forehead against hers, the tears not yet stopping.
You only got to move into your own home a few weeks later, after trying to work around your cramped apartment as a couple.
You had managed to spoil her senselessly in those weeks, trying desperately to liften her spirits. Over the years, you had noted down every little scenic cafe you’d thought she’d like and took her to one everyday as well as buying her every single thing she showed interest in.
The worst of it all, however, was the ikea trip, she seemed to love it but you didn’t but anything that made her happy made you, even if your back was aching.
Although, it had been a couple of days since moving in, you could still sense the unsurety of her surroundings and you felt a little bit helpless.
“Who are you texting?” You questioned as you laid down two cups of tea on your new coffee table, noticing Alessia’s smile fade on and off.
“Ella, she’s updating me about everything in manny.”
“Ah, what’s happening?”
“Nothing much, they’ve gone out for dinner and she was just talking to me about Joe.” She rolled her eyes at the last mention, finally placing her phone down to focus fully on you.
“You okay?” You asked as her eyes fluttered, picking at her freshly manicured nails which she moaned at because they weren’t as good as her usual.
“Mhm.”
“Do you want a cuddle?”
“Mhm.”
You shuffled closer to her when she repeated herself, wrapping your arms around her neck and resting your chin on the top of her head.
Her fingers fiddled with your necklace as she tucked her head into your neck, distracting herself from the overflow of emotions she felt, she didn’t want to seem selfish.
Even though it was silent in the room, you could tell there were tears rolling down her cheeks, the light shakes vibrating from her body giving it away.
“Do you want me to call someone else, lotte maybe?” You whispered into the silence, the movie on the TV temporarily paused.
“Why?” She sniffed.
“Just wondered if you wanted a different face around..”
She lifted her face up to yours, the affect of her feelings taking hold of your expression made her lip wobble more, she didn’t want to feel like this. Pin it all on you.
“I don’t mean it like that, Y/N. You know i don’t..”
“I know.. i’m just worried.” Huffing, you looked away, reaching for the remote and Alessia looked upon helplessly, deciding to place her head back on your now stiff shoulder.
You knew you had to do something to sort this out, make Alessia feel like Alessia again. Otherwise it’ll affect your relationship, the only relationship she feels entirely comfortable in as of now.
Whilst Lessi’s focus was on the animated film she had asked for you to put on, you concentrated on your phone to try and come up with a solution.
You couldn’t lie, but you did look it up on google with the search being; ‘how to make your girlfriend not feel homesick.’
After miles of searching and quietly listening to people’s stories on tik tok, you decided to do what you were planning to do. Bring in some new faces.
She accepted the invited pretty much straight away before going on to admit her concerns for her best friend, willing to make the drive to make her feel somewhat better.
Sighing contentedly, you placed your phone down on the arm of the sofa and nestled down slightly, pulling your girlfriend in tighter as you now focused on the tv with no idea as to what was happening.
“What’s going on?”
Alessia snorted in reply before mumbling out the basics, throat still hoarse from earlier.
You decided not to tell her about Ella and Joes suspected arrival that following saturday, only instructing her to get dressed as you were having an ‘at home date’. However, you knew she was a bit suspicious to the amount of food you were cooking.
“Can i help?”
“No, go sit down in the living room. I have it all under control.” You pushed at her shoulders gently before you heard a loud bubbling noise, rushing towards the stove as Alessia giggled.
“As i said, all under control.” You smiled over your shoulder before you were interrupted by a knock at the door. “Can you get that, please?”
“Are we expecting anyone?” She asked, mostly to herself as she made her way down the hallway.
She opened the door with a blank face before looking at the arrival, furrowing her eyebrows as she took in her best friend who was expectedly waiting for her to be allowed in.
“What..” She scoffed a laugh. “What are you doing here?”
“We came to see you, silly, now come on let us in. I have the alcohol.” Her broad mancunian accent brought familiarity back to alessia, crashing into Ella for a tight hug.
“Alessia, sweet. Let them in.” You spoke before saying your hellos to joe and ushering him into the living room as well as taking the bottle of wine from Ella before leaving them to themselves for a minute.
“Alessia, as much as this is lovely, i can barely breathe.”
“Sorry.. i just missed you.”
“I’ve missed you too, but i’m here now. We’ll be having to get used to these trips, they’ll be weekly.”
Alessia giggled as she shuffled on her feet, allowing Ella to actually come inside before kicking the door shut.
“You okay?”
“Yeah, you?”
“Properly, are you okay? A little bird told me that you haven’t been doing well with the move.” She pushed Alessia’s hair over her shoulder, picking off a strand that laid rested on her shoulder.
“Is that the only reason you’re here?”
“What? No, i was planning to come down here anyways, it’s just that Y/N is very worried about you.. and so am i.”
Alessia stared at Ella before directing her view towards her fingers, which she was anxiously twisting.
“It’s.. it’s just hard and i’m annoyed with the way i’m handling it because i’m a professional, i should know how to deal with these situations but i just.. can’t.. and it’s pissing me off.”
“Lessi, you shouldn’t be annoyed at yourself because you can’t settle into a routine your not used to with a snap of a fingers.” She mimed as she said so, reassuring the vulnerable girl in front of her. “You’re human, everyone goes through it. Even i didn’t when i moved from city to united, and that’s in the same city.”
Ella watched as her smile was reformed, taking her hands in hers before mentioning that you probably need help in the kitchen from the amount of profanities she can hear.
The night was perfect for Alessia, you think it was the most she had smiled over the last coming days, eagerly joining in with whatever conversational topics were flown over the table. Never one being football.
A smile was drawn on your face for the entirety, catching yourself admire Alessia and her homely giggle as it reappeared once again, and that was all you needed.
#caits little fics#alessia russo x reader#alessia russo#woso x reader#woso imagine#woso oneshot#woso ficlets
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(Ultimate X-Men, issue #11)
yall think if i say Nuh Uh enough times it’ll make them be niceys to eachother
god fucking damn this comic has me in a chokehold. actually. i wanna put IT in a chokehold. also some extra context for vics little ‘i hate u’ speech -> the previous issue literally has someone hes working for call him ‘poor mans wolverine’ so i dont think he formed that opinion on his own. i think it came from always being 2nd in weapon x after wolverine showed up, despite being the only one who actually signed up for it. no matter how much he killed and tried to prove himself, they always still prefered wolverine. he went from being the best by just being himself, to now having someone who could replace him. replace his comfort, replace his worth. like most sabretooths, i assume this one also had to constantly fight to be worth something, having the need to be worth something, anything, in others eyes. he found a place where he was able to show what everyone says hes good at, the only place where hes really allowed to do so, a place where everyone there says he belongs(even if its in a degrading way), and now that role gets taken by someone else. even if theyre literally torturing wolverine more, sabretooth sees it as them giving him more attention. hes no longer special. the things that alienate him arent special anymore, now theyre back to just being bad. unworthy.
wolverine didnt do anything to make sabretooth hate him, he just hates him out of jealousy and fear. and he doesnt really even hate him, he just hates the attention he gets. victor needs to be better or else hes not useful anymore.
for some reason in my last post about this series, i neglected to include this bit here⤵️
hes been so affected by the need for weapon x’s approval, to be the best at being the worst, that hes convinced he cant exist anywhere else. theyre only good as weapons, they cant be anything else, theyre living trash.
and yet, hes terrified of being thrown out.
and i think hes also scared to recognize that hes an individual as well.
its either be all the things that society hates about him and not have to worry about it, while being at a place that he has a warped sense of ‘belonging’, or have to actually fight for himself. he’d rather fight society than fight against society. cuz then its the world against him, rather than him against the world.
#sabretooth#victor creed#posting late at night so none of the sabretooth fans are awake to see him being a dick lol#whoever made that issue was like ‘yea make him the prettiest hes ever been. great. now make him an asshole.’#the coat…the fingerless gloves….the ponytail…..dreamy sighhh#THE BOOTS ALSO THE BOOTS#then under the coat is a bunch of useless belts around his arms just for the aesthetic#and that gay lookin headband ARGHHH#WHYD U HAVE TO BE SO FUCKED UP IN THIS ISSUE WHILE LOOKING SO GOOODDDD#and he calls him ‘precious’ im gonna kill the writers#anyway i will write an essay defending any and all sabretooths. i’ll find a way.
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Break for Distance - Part 1
Finally got around to uploading this. There’s something I want to write for around the GoF era but I’ll save that for December-ish, it’s a little more of a Christmas feel. This is going to be at least three or four parts (or even might be more, or I could break it up into two titles).
Word count 1k
Rating: Angst
When George told Francesca about his and Fred’s plan to leave Hogwarts, she didn’t know what to say.
“How are you planning to go?”
“Like, physically?”
“Yes,” she confirmed, crossing her arms. Her brow had furrowed so much, as he had delightedly revealed the plan he and Fred had been sneaking off and whispering about for weeks, she wasn’t sure the line would ever leave her forehead.
“Broom, I’m gonna go nick mine back from her,” George replied, as if it was a straightforward operation.
“I can already hear your mother panicking about your grades.”
“Me too,” he said with a grin. “But we’re not worried about that, now we have the shop.”
“I know, but George,” Francesca said, trying to find the words to carefully express her concerns.
Umbridge was closely linked with the ministry, that much was beyond obvious. Her power extended beyond Hogwarts, and Francesca could see things progressing to students being arrested for school rule infractions, if things didn’t change. As long as Fudge was in power, Umbridge was too. Francesca worried that such a big spectacle of an exit would not just damage their academic reputation (which obviously was not a priority to the twins), but possibly affect their lives in legal ways, if Umbridge wanted to take it that far. She didn’t get a choice to voice her concerns because George, still riding the high of recounting the plan, interrupted her again.
“I know it’ll be a bummer not being together the last few weeks of the year, but soon the flat in the shop will be done, and I’ll have my own room at last so you can stay with me in the summer if you’re allowed, or wanted I guess,” he rambled. He wasn’t even looking at her more than a few glances, which was beginning to wind her up a lot.
“It’s not that George,” she said, trying to interrupt again.
“Just promise you won’t tell mum?”
“I won’t, but George-“
“I’d have asked if you wanted to join us, but I know you’re trying for Head Girl and you need N.E.W.T.s for nursing if you’re still planning on nursing after Hogwarts, plus it was better the less people knowing. At least while planning it out-“
“George for god’s sake shut up!”
George turned to her, his mouth open with the shape of his next word about to come from it. He closed it with a frown on his face, unhappy with his girlfriend’s terse tone and sudden outburst.
“Sorry. But you’ve interrupted me loads- don’t do it again!” She said, raising her hand as his mouth opened to defend himself. She took a deep breath when he closed his mouth again, his frown deepening, but respecting her desire to talk. “Listen George, I’m not going to give you any hell about your exams, you’ll probably have your mother on about that for the rest of your life, but are you really sure this is the right way to leave? Can’t you just drop out?”
“We want to send a message,” he said tensely, relaxing a bit at Francesca’s diplomatic avoidance of the exam topic.
“Okay, but isn’t dropping out itself a message? I know you and Fred aren’t exactly subtle, and I do love that about you, but is now really the time?”
“We think so.”
Francesca sighed again, realising he was being a bit stubborn for the sake of it in this conversation. She was tired too, so her patience was probably thinner than she realised.
George softened a bit more when he saw her trying to calm herself. He realised she was just trying to look after him, which made him grin again.
“‘Cess, when have me and Fred ever not been alright? With all our chaotic moments the worst that’s ever really happened is detention.”
“You lost your money, I know that wasn’t your fault, but it was still risky-“
“But look at us now. Luck is on our side because we trust it. We both know this is the right way to do what we want to do. Can’t you trust us too? Trust me?”
George’s plea made Francesca suddenly emotional. Of course she trusted him. But everything changed last year, with Cedric. Suddenly, everything wasn’t a joke anymore.
“George, what about the future? Everything’s different now, anything could happen. Don’t you think you need to be a bit careful? What if it affects the business? Or your family? I don’t want you to throw your whole future away, to send a message!”
George considered her words for a moment. He understood entirely what she was saying, and it was something he and Fred even discussed in the planning of the whole event. But he knew this was the right thing, and he trusted himself and his brother.
“Francesca, the future isn’t any of your concern. I’ll handle it.”
Those words felt like a knife. Before he could see the tears well in her eyes, or hear her breath hitch. She all but flew back to the common room from the empty classroom they were in, up the stairs, and under the covers of her bed.
Francesca avoided George for the last two days before he and Fred’s “great escape”. George had lingered in the common room a few times trying to catch her, but Fred had kept him that busy preparing he never got the chance. Katie tried a few times to coax her out of the dorm, where she spent most of her time now outside of class, but it was no use.
She didn’t even watch their spectacle from the courtyard like the rest of the school. She listened to the ruckus from her bed, staring at the canopy above her bed, trying to stop the tears in her eyes falling again. As far as Francesca was concerned in that moment, she needed to get out of Hogwarts as soon as possible, since George told her his future wasn’t any of her concern.
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hullo, greenhouse anon again, i’ve reread midnight dreams as a whole and wish to say more! :3
i don’t think i’ve properly described how the three of them sharing a bed has affected me. they’re domesticated, laying in each other’s space when they’re the most vulnerable yet feel the safest. they’re finally all together and don’t have to worry about one another because they’re finally in one bed.
it’s such a large dose of serotonin in a little scene that i doubt we’ll experience often (given scar’s sleeping schedule), but the moment has finally arrived. unfortunate that it had to come from grian’s expense but i can’t deny how much more it adds when mumbo and scar aren’t far or hesitant to stay <3
i never considered how difficult it would’ve first been for mumbo to share a bed with someone again and to think at how it brings him protective joy that scar lays alongside grian—
they all aid each other unintentionally through every struggle, traumatic past, or sacrificial thought by simply loving one another, i can’t. loving someone can be a vulnerability yet they’re all such strong individuals alone, survivors, and it gives them something to fight for ahhhhhhh
also also he called them both his mates!!! yess, they are yours and you are theirs, the acceptance and free use of the official title from mumbo’s vampire instincts and nature gives me life.
(lowkey though, i don’t think we’ve addressed enough how traumatized mumbo must be from grian’s multiple kidnappings. both have happened when he’s asleep and the fact that his late wife was murdered in bed before he was forced turned and pushed into hundreds of years of solitude— my guy has some serious trauma from waking to horrendous events involving his lovers, no wonder he’s such a light sleeper. i’m surprised he’s not even more reluctant to sleep given that he can’t be with his lovers when they’re active and alone without him watching [ik they don’t need his constant protection but instinct wise, yknow?]. i think it genuinely just adds to scar sleeping in their bed for the first time too)
the pain in knowing that they’re closer than they’ve ever been before and that shines light onto scar’s constant struggle is bittersweet. mumbo and grian finally know how bad it can/it’s getting to be; they can be there to comfort but they can’t take his pain away (at least not now, i hope).
the even bigger pain that grian has begun to think of what will happen if/when they all potentially pass because of his nightmare. they deserve peace and happiness after all the fighting and running each of them has done from their past, yet i assume it’ll be a bit before then (not that i’m complaining, i love angst and even more when it’s your writing).
to think that grian would be physically alone in the natural world if mumbo and scar passed is so cruel yet tragically intriguing. that through all the struggles they’ve faced alone and together, they would never get to rest in peace alongside each other after conflict or mortal ties. i refuse to believe that will be the case, however, given how powerful grian has been hinted to be beyond looks (now when will they all realize is the real question).
they’ve finally realized how in love they all are with each other after +140k words, i wonder how long it’ll take for them to realize how op they are power and ally wise (they’re beautiful, but they’re still men, afterall)
anyway, it’s 2 am and i have to wake early, ty for feeding me content <33
Hello hello again >:3 I love to see it~~
I love love love domestic moments jkfgdklfk them just lying together sleeping in bed and just being there im hjkfdsjkf
Scar doesn't sleep often but he will totally just lie in bed with them for a while and enjoy the peace <3 kjhgfdkjgfd Grian may have had the worst night of his life in the last three or so years but at least he got to cuddle with his favorite men jhfdsk <3 These two will do ANYTHING for their lovely birdman <3 If he needs them they'll be there jkfdjksk <3<3
jkgfdklgfdjk after decades/centuries of sleeping alone it's definitely quite a difference sleeping with someone next to you. But he's definitely not complaining, getting to see them there, in his bed, where he can see them and protect them and just hjfjkdsjk <3
YESSSS that is my favorite thing with relationships, how simply LOVING someone can be so powerful <3 of course relationships need more than simply love or attraction, it still takes work, but it comes so naturally for them <3 ghhghjgf-
YES he's finally begun to embrace his more Vampiric instincts <3 It probably helps with how subtly encouraging both Grian and Scar are, small assurances that his instincts are not bad as long as he doesn't take them to extremes and they're part of who he is hflds <3
(hahahahahahahahahaha :) :) Yeah bad shit happens while Mumbo sleeps jkfdksjfg it definitely makes him anxious, I'm sure the fact that Scar sleeping occasionally has the side effect of a painful core restabilization, of which the aftermath would show itself after Mumbo has gone to bed, won't add to this anxiety- BUT YEAH everything would be solved (not really but you know) if they all had the same sleeping schedule haha :) )
jhgfkhgfjkd YEAH <3 </3 They can be there for him now that they know, because he's been dealing with this alone for YEARS and honestly over the last few years has probably only been holding on for Tubbo's sake </3 But now he has Grian and Mumbo who will be there for him through it and they all know the truth now and he doesn't have to act so strong all the time and just hjfkdskfd-
Hahaha if I can make people a little more heartbroken I will <3
(Hmmmm when and how they realize it... :) )
LMAO when I said it was slowburn I meant it <3 But yes, when will they realize how absolutely powerful they are... the ultimate power throuple in the most literal of ways hjfdslkk
(HGJFSHKFHSK)
You are welcome and I hope you slept well~! <3 Thank you for reading and taking the time to share your thoughts~! <3
#ask#midnight series#hermitshipping#Mumscarian#I have to leave for work in 30 minutes and it is tragic
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Hunter x Hunter Chapter 400 - Concealed
FINALLY the 400th chapter ! Before the hiatus, we learnt they were thinking of changing the schedule for Hunter x Hunter serialization. It’ll probably stay at Shueisha though but probably not in the Weekly Shounen Jump, I doubt, they’d let it be on the Jump Ryu since it’s only online and Hunter x Hunter definitely help selling some jump issues. Monthly would cover the amount of chapter we had before 2018 before Togashi tried to be more active. We’ll see but I think something bimonthly like One Piece could be possible but we’ll see
Back to Phinks and Feitan, sooooo the hideout is not on the 3rd floor but on the 4th or 5th floor.
I thought tier 2 wasn’t an option but maybe it’s. Phinks’ En can reach 100 meters it seems, pretty good. Of course,processing all that could be hard, fuck. And we’ve got confirmation that En really lowers defenses.
Nobu’s BACK ALREADY ! He found them pretty quickly in this crowd too. They’re really convinced it’s on tier 2, we’ll see
Oh so there was a nen space not just a regular space protected by nen ? But you did think transmutation was a possibility ? Yep something feels off
It’s true there wouldn’t have been any problem if Morena was on the higher floor, away from her turf. But we know her office was empty so where is it ? Franklin is a good option to get rid of them from the doorway but wouldn't he risk targeting a counter type ?
OH FUCK, an emergency announcement is bad news.
WTF, don’t tell me Taithon taboo has been breached. We’ve got a liar little bro without a scar, all of them seem so weird
This is fucked up can she rewrite personality, please no, I’m scared. Juliano seemed so cool
Okay I freaked out for nothing seems Taithon’s beast can bring happiness, maybe they’re just all high on serotonin
Izunavi really wants a shipwide reading brainwash, OH FUCK, is this the emergency announcement ? Taithon looks more endearing here. I know she has nearly no chance to survive this trip so I feel bad
Wait how do you know about Kaccho, did you see the corpse in the ship that was retrieved ?
This is still Kaccho, maybe she told everyone ? But would she be draining so much aura, death should be a sufficient condition to lower the burden even if it wasn’t nen after death that usually seems to run indefinitely.
I agree to everything there, it’s good to see Kaccho back, but her death really wasn’t hidden long then
Melody is resolved then
I guess For Tsubeppa and Luzurus, Duazul is the main readon they can leverage amnesty. Well, please let Melody be okay, She’s even protecting a ghost’s feelings about Keeny’s death. She’s so kind
Okay so yep, Melody’s ability is best to heal mental health issues and the body can be affected a bit too. Giving away a counter measure against her ability is a bit reckless in this war though
OOF that would be hard 3 nen users in there who are quite dangerous
A CONFESSION !?!? CUUUUTE, but your plan is still so dangerous
Is that why Melody thought his heartbeat always felt weird and calm ?????
Or maybe not, yeah maybe he’s dangerous. melody, how many fucked up manipulators have you met ? Beside Morel and Zushi it’s pretty much the Slytherin category
MELODY TIME anyway, I’m so happy !!! Is there any reason to not kill Terrorsandwhich ? I can’t see this guy being affiliated to Camila, Taithon, Halkenburg or Marayam ???? Melody must be annoying to interrogate if she just flexes her right to remain silent non stop, pretty efficient though
This guy just really seems to be after everyone being as safe as possible, maybe Halkenburg’s men control him ? Maybe not
More political fuckery, martial law is the worst, the army is the least trustworthy branch of the government and it’s lead by a prince anyway there
Where did she goooooooo ! PLEASE DON’T BE DEAD
Probably went to confirm your death
WAIT WHAT, Is Kaccho giving you energy ? Like nen after death aura tank ? Or maybe you’re just unwell Fu
Or what I feared she’s exerting herself too much
I can’t cry I just feel bad and worried, like I’m really getting anxious for her
Yep she’s weird but let her sleep
What’s this BZ BZZZ BZZZ
What ?!?!?
Camila’s men didn’t commit suicide ? It wouldn’t have been powerful enough unless it was close to her anyway
WHO DID THAT TO FUUUUUUUUU
I love Zhang Lei, really a nice guy ready to give out his coins
Urgh never accept, even if it could maybe help Kurapika
Yep get out, Melody big brain time
This is Camila’s doing right ? But when ??? Granted the overuse of her ability could help weakening her but still
The last one that knew nen was Longiiiiii OKAY, well she didn’t sound like the user of Secret Majority, who it’s then, Cleapatro seemed weird but maybe it’s a judge.
BACK TO HIATUS, I am anxious as fuck, a lot will be happening in the next batch, I love these chapters spent on catching up on various plot and princes shenanigans. melody chapters are always welcome. It was so nice to see Kaccho again. AND WHAT was THE ANNOUNCEMENT ABOUT. Nice hiatus everyone
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August 12, 2016
“Protective? What, like you were jealous?” Jessica tried to clarify.
“No, I wasn’t jealous. I just felt like…” Cassie bit her lip and gripped her fists tightly. “Like I wanted to show him off or something. It was almost like I wanted people to know I was in a relationship with him.” Cassie said nothing after that and neither did Jessica as she listened to her. “I just grabbed his hand without even thinking and now I guess he wants to know why I did it.”
“Cassie?” She looked up at Jessica’s voice. “I’m not sure if you know, but that’s a totally normal feeling.”
“Huh?”
“I mean, take it from me, I’m not trying to show off Seko to everyone I meet, but there are totally times I wanna be affectionate with him in public. It’s a little thing called PDA.” She said with a small chuckle in her voice. “You pretty much just said you wanna be known as a couple. Not because you’re worried someone will take him, but just because you care about him so much that being together as much as possible is what you want the most.”
Cassie’s eyes were wide as she listened to the explanation. Cassie had only realized what that meant, this meant Cassie actually did like Brayleigh more than she expected. But how? She couldn’t understand how she could fall for someone so quickly.
Even with Akihiko she…
“Like, did you not get this feeling with Aki?” Cassie looked at Jessica, snapping her back into the conersation. Cassie then shook her head. “Seriously?”
Cassie confirmed it with a nod, “It wasn’t like I didn’t like him. It was just that, there were some things I wish I could have done, but couldn’t because of the kind of person Aki is. He wasn’t the overly affectionate type, I couldn’t act… you know, like me when we were together considering he was such a straight and narrow type of guy. So I never thought I had to do much of anything.” She paused. “I guess I should have been worried, but it’s a different feeling with Brayleigh.”
“You feel like you have to show your affection huh?”
Cassie lowered her head. “Just because… I want him to know how much I care about him.”
Jessica couldn’t hold back the laugh that built up. Cassie just watched as she got out her laughter. It was almost as if Cassie had told a joke, Jessica was holding onto her stomach, but eventually calmed herself.
“I can’t believe it, you’re actually just a regular person after all!��� Jessica gave Cassie a sly look. “I guess this’ll be something you’re not prepared for.”
Cassie looked off thinking the worst of this situation. Not only was she falling for some guy again, she was experiencing something she had never felt before.
“Cassie?” Jessica got her attention back. “I can tell you’re overthinking this, and no matter how I feel about you being with Brayleigh; if you like him, I think you and him should try this.”
“R-really?”
“Yeah, I mean that weird contract thing you said you two worked out, it actually sounds like a good thing for you two. Brayleigh can learn to stop being a loser and you can learn to be a regular person. It’s kind of strange, but you two kind of fit each other’s issues perfectly.”
“So… you think I should keep dating him?”
“Honestly, I think it’ll be good for you both.”
Cassie let out a small breath. “I’m getting a headache just thinking about this.” Jessica smirked, Cassie looked back up at her. “Still… I wish things weren’t this complicated.”
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Maybe it is on me and not on him. I spent all day with him but I left upset that he didn’t fuck me. I guess I should’ve said something. But I never had to before. We hardly fuck anymore. It was a few times a day to daily to now maybe twice a week ? I don’t think I can put it down to circumstances. I feel like im old news to him. He’s not getting enough personal time. He needs to destress and im not an outlet for that. I just feel like we’re getting so distant. He doesn’t indulge my little side at all. In fact, he just down right refuses to sometimes. I ask something and he goes “im not like that, stop tryna change me”. Im not tryna change him. But if he can’t deal with my little side idk how I’m going to cope. He can be strict and parental, but he can’t be playful? I don’t understand why there’s such a block there.
I’m just worried I’m not as interesting for him anymore. Is it because of the improvements I’ve made ? Have I not made enough ? Is he attracted to me ? I can’t help but think all the worst things. It’s like I’m constantly waiting for a break, there’s always something, first it was his uni, then the queens thing, then he got ill, then he went back to team, and his deadlines, then we moved home and now he’s unwell and having to pay out and he’s stressed with life. There’s never a time where he’s okay and switches off. There’s always something. I don’t think I give him a break for any of those things. He says gaming does. That’s fair. I want him to have that time. But he makes out that I take up all that time ? He has time off during the day when I’m at work, when I’m at the gym, when I’m out “2-3 times a week” as he said. He worded it like I want all his free time but it’s not that. I want to give him all MY free time.
I’m due to come on so I know the pms shit is gonna start kicking in soon. Maybe that’s why I’m being all emotional again. I hate when he sees the glimpses of me when I can’t contain my feelings. When I let out how it all affects me. Makes me feel like he sees me as weak. Just like every other emotional woman. I don’t like it when he gets to see those moments. When I have to tell him I’m experiencing those things. My head just tells me that the more he sees the more he realises I’m not who he thought I was. That’s why things are being so distant. I feel like our dynamic has slowed down. And I swear to god if he ever utters the words about “ramping up” to me I’ll lose it. I’m not her. I’m not like what they had. It shouldn’t get to a point of “ramping up”. It’ll be fucked if we ever slowed down. I need all that stuff. He says he needs it to. He says I’ve got a shitty attitude and im getting away with lots atm. Does he ever think that maybe im tryna ensure that he’s keeping up his attitude too ? Idk idk. I haven’t even been ticking off my dailys the last 3 or 4 days. Idk how long I can keep up with this living separate situation. I think I might move out early next year. Even if it’s by myself. God I’m getting so in my head again.
It was just really meh to see Jordan and Alex together. To hear how he spoke to her. It made me miss how I would get spoken to. How she would get spoken to. I think I’m just rambling and getting in my head again. But Ik she’s upset.
I feel unwanted because he didn’t touch me. I think like I’m not an escape for him to switch off. And I feel like he doesn’t want to even try to indulge with my little side, at all.
Now idk when I’m gonna see him coz if that stupid conversation yesterday. He said maybe Tuesday eve. He’s gonna play games now that cadets isn’t on. I want him to have that time. Now he’s said all that. I just wanna give him all the time. I wanna shift my focus. Give him space. He says that’s not what he wants but I just don’t understand. I wish my FP would just shift. He doesn’t understand how much it affects me. He’s my utter world. I don’t feel like I need down time from him. I feel like I get personal time when I’m with him. He just doesn’t feel the same. That’s okay but it’s just shitty for me.
Ugh why won’t I just stop. I’m convincing myself he’s gone off me. I’m telling myself that there’s so many problems. Fuck me I wish I could just mute my head. I need to just distance myself. Because my expectations are just hurting me.
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#personal shits coming up#tw: mental health#personal#basically changing meds again tomorrow#back to the ones i took some time ago- and shifting back to up my dose on another#which is fine i guess#but i worry a little about just how it’ll affect me… and worst of all (unfortunately- in this society) my work…#i’ve also been given news meds help stabilise me when my ups and downs get too difficult but uh… haven’t tried that one. ever.#and it worries me… haven’t actually heard like a single good word on it from anyone i know who’s tried it but… who knows#psychiatrist said the other alternatives are all a lot… stronger and depends on what i need but i fear being ‘drugged’ to unconsciousness#like my executive dysfunction is bad as it is on the daily#don’t need to actually make it worse…#sorry i’m just rambling to…. remind myself of when i changed stuff… and to just#let it out somewhere i guess#in some vague way but ugh#meds can be life savers but they come with such hastle and sometimes i just don’t feel Ready to even try it but…#sometimes shits are so off anyway so you just have to give it a shot…?#but yeah… we’ll see#sorry if you read all of this and i’m not really saying anything but…#i know i’m privileged to even get access to meds without being completely bankrupt but… it makes me worry and it makes me realise that#my issues and problems are real and tangible and tbh… i can deal with the Idea of being a lil sad or having a physical issue that goes#unresolved…….. (i can’t).. but accepting that they ARE that problematic that they validate meds? for some reason makes me kind of…#scared almost idk#idk i don’t want to realise i’m disabled (physically and mentally so to speak) but i am. i need meds to function and that’s how it is…#it’s still a trial and error thing and that pains me but…. ah…#i’ll stop now anyway#sorry and thanks for listening in- if you did#sorry for being so personal again and sorry for not really bringing any news to address but anyway.. wish you all the best#if you’re reading this- i do hope you can take away the ‘don’t give up- and care for yourself and take yourself seriously’ message but…#i’m struggling with that myself but… what can we do- but try
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When The Dead Come Knocking || Jang Wujin
Part Four
Part 1 part 2 part 3
Pairing: Wu-Jin X Reader
Genre: horror, gore, fluff
Warming: Death, violence, cursing, blood
Summary: Nam Chae-Young had an obsession with everything gore since she was a little girl, little did she know that one normal day at school would turn into the worst day of her life. Fighting to survive shouldn’t the that hard, right?
Sometime had passed and the sun started to rise. The group was still asleep, but Chae knew they needed food. Last night they made a makeshift bathroom in the recording booth; Chae and On-Jo picked it up from their father, alongside many other survival skills. Chae folds the curtain she used as a blanket and looks to Wu-Jin, Dae-Su and Joon-Yeong, who were cuddled together asleep on the cold classroom floor. She unfolds the blanket and drapes it over them, they all immediately cuddled into it.
She picks up her school bag and empties out the contents and makes her way to the window, where she climbed out. Her heart was racing like crazy, she hated heights, but her father taught her how to climb and she was good at it. He sometimes hated how adventurous she was, but he knew she was young and teens would do that. She remembered one time she fell from a tree and broke her arm. Her father was so worried he yelled at her; soon realising that wasn’t the best idea. So he took her for some ice- cream to cheer her up.
Lowering herself slowly, she notices the classroom they were in that was now empty. She lets out a sigh of relief and quietly climbs in, not wanting to cause any noise. She looks under desks and in cabinets for food, in which she found none. Then she remembered the teachers would often take her snacks off her and hide them in their desks. She walks over and opens in, there was snacks there. She smiles to herself and fills the bag.
Classroom after classroom she found small food items here and there, but nothing major. A hand covers her mouth and she was dragged into a closet. She gripped her knife, which the person took, and when she turns, she sees Gwi-Nam. Relief washed over her body seeing a familiar face. He signalled for her to shush, she nods and he removes his hand.
“There was zombies in the class you were heading for,” he whispers to her,” Are you okay? Are you hurt?” he checks her.
“I’m okay,” she whispers back,” Thank you. Are you okay? I was so worried, I thought you died!” she wraps her arms around him. Gwi-Nam became stiff, having had no affection in awhile, but he slowly calms down and hugs her back.
“I’m glad you’re okay. I thought you-“ he runs a hand over his face,” It doesn’t matter. It just matters that you’re safe. I’m gonna escape tonight, I was in the cafeteria when things went down, but you weren’t there. Escape with me. “ his clothes were covered in blood. He had clearly fought his way out.
“Gwi-Nam…. I can’t. I’m with my sister and others, all of us trying to leave at once will get us killed. We’ll be on top of one another, it’ll be messy,” she felt guilty letting him down, but Gwi-Nam had a soft spot for her, he always did.
He nods,” I understand, it’s okay. Just be safe, please. And the minute you escape, find me. “ he kisses her forehead. “The dead are gone,” he peaks his head out of the door. He turns to her,”Do you have a weapon?” He asks. Chae holds up her knife and he chuckles, pulling another knife from his pocket,” Take this, that one won’t do shit. “
“What about you?” she asks.
Gwi-Nam pulls up his black shirt and shows he has a knife in his pants,” I’m good. Go before more dead ones come,” she nods and hugs him again, worrying for him. She knew if she asked him to come he’d just say no, he knew her friends despised him. She pulls away and takes off, noticing some zombies had arrows in them.
She makes her way back to the classroom and starts climbing down,” Mi-Jin, this way!” She heard as she lowers herself. She didn’t wanna run into anymore people than she already had to.
There was a slight breeze that embraced her, it’s soft coolness sending goosebumps on her legs, making her shiver. The group tensed when they noticed the hose start to rattle, they all woke up to Chae gone, did she leave them? Was it another zombie?
In the pit of her stomach, On-Jo felt a strong pang of guilt at the words she had said to her sister, was the last thing she said to her the final thing she’d say?
“You’re my sister,” God, On-Jo, why so dumb?
“Take this,” Ji-Min hands Cheong-San a broom to whack whatever came down, but Cheong-San dropped it when he seen the familiar Doc Martin’s.
Chae stood on the ledge and pulls herself in, pausing when she sees everyone stare at her,”You gonna hit me or can I move?” she smirks to Cheong- San.
”Where were you?”
“Are you okay?”
“Are you bit?”
“Why didn’t you tell me you were going?”
The voices of her friends surrounded her, she put up her hand in attempt to shut them up,” I was looking for food. Ah, would you stop?!” Chae slaps On-Jo’s hands off her.
“I’m not bit. I’m okay!” she huffs, now being irritated by all of the voices. “I was hungry and I know you all were too,” she puts her bag on the table and pulls out snacks; chips, chocolate, water. It wasn’t much at it would be the only bit of food they were gonna get for another few days, but it would have to do.
Wu-Jin pulls her into a tight hug and Dae-Su soon enough sandwiched her ,” We were ready to go find you, sis,” Dae-Su explains.
“I’m sorry, but you all were sleeping and I didn’t want to disturb you. “
“Did you find survivors?” Hyo- Ryeong asks, picking up a bar and tearing it open.
Chae looks at her feet,” I heard some students, but they seemed to be at least a hallway down and I could hear dead people after them, so I wasn’t risking it. “ she left the part about Gwi-Nam out, they wouldn’t have cared anyways.
“We’re going to find a phone,” Su-Hyeok states.
A phone. Why didn’t she think of that?
“We’ll be back soon. Thank you for finding food,” Cheong-San smiles.
Chae nods and takes a seat, she opens a bar and takes a little bite. She was gonna take the smallest bite each time she got hungry to save some.
-
Cheong-San and Su-Hyeok weren’t back yet and everyone was getting worried. On-Jo stands beside Chae who was observing the grounds around them,” I’m sorry for what I said. After I-Sak I shut you out completely. I thought about myself and didn’t think about you, you were dealing, too,” she takes Chae’s hand.
Chae pulls her hand back,” Don’t apologise to me because you’ll feel guilty if I died and you’d have to deal with the fact that the last thing you said to me was hurtful,” she responds.
“I’m not… Nam-Ra made me realise that you didn’t deserve it and you’re a good sister, I’m just sorry it’s taken me this long to notice,” On-Jo admits.
Chae let’s out a breath of air and looks back to On-Jo,” It’s okay,” she smiles. On-Jo pulls her into a hug,” I hate not speaking with you,” she mumbles, holding her tight.
“Me too,” Chae smiles.
-
Su-Hyeok returned with no Cheong-San and the groups only option until he returned was to get a drone. Chae sat on the floor beside Wu-Jin, she wasn’t happy about On-Jo going out there.
Wu-Jin takes her hand and gives it a squeeze, when he lets it go, Chae felt something in her hand. Looking down, her cheeks turn into a crimson red, it was his name tag. “This means you wanna g-go out?” she says nervously, Wu-Jin nods and pushes her hair from her face. His eyes land on her lips, he looks back up to her for permission. She nods and leans in, her heart was racing the closer he got, their lips were inches apart.
“They’re back!” Ji-Min announces.
Wu-Jin pulls back disappointed, whilst Chae was red.
-
“Scout the school for him then once we know he’s okay, we go outside. “On-Jo says.
They all huddled around a little screen and watch as Joon-Yeong took off. Wu-Jin was on a seat and Chae was beside him. The drone showed the classrooms and the dead that filled it, their friends, teachers and even some parents that were visiting the school were turned, hungrily banging on the window as they spot the drone.
Chae felt her heart break for everyone. She just hoped Cheong-San and Gwi-Nam were still okay. “What if everyone’s gone?” Su-Hyeok sighs.
Nobody replies, they were all too busy observing to see if anyone they knew were there. They scanned the faces for Cheong-San.
“Huh, go back,” Wu-Jin says,” My sister,” he mutters, looking at the arrows in zombies necks and chests,” She was at a tournament today. Why is she back?”
“Are you sure it’s her?” Chae asks, taking his hand, he nods. “If her arrows are there, it means she’s okay,” she smiles. She wasn’t sure. Was the people she heard Wu-Jin’s sister?
“Cheong-San!” Dae-Su points,” Stay there!” he shouts to the screen.
“He can’t hear you,” Joon-Yeong informs, flying the drone outside the window.
“We’ll come for you!” Su-Hyeok shouts to the screen.
“I said he can’t hear you!” Joon-Yeong says again.
“He’s alive!” On-Jo was pulled into a hug by Su-Hyeok.
“Now that we know Cheong- San is alive, let’s go outside,” Ji-Min says.
“Are we sure we’re ready for what we’ll see?” Nam- Ra asks.
“Huh?” They turn to her.
“Yeah. We might not like what we see. Look at how bad things are in here, are we prepared to see the outside?” Chae looks around.
The group stayed silent and the drone started flying out.
“Wait,” Ji-Min says,” My dads truck.”
“Where? The black or the white one,” Joon-Yeong went closer. Ji-Min’s sobs filled the air. In the truck were two people who had transformed into the undead, clawing the the dashboard window. Chae-Young’s heart broke.
It was Ji-Min’s parents.
Is her father okay? Are all of their parents gone?
Wu-Jin put his head into his arms and let his tears flow. He was obviously worried for his sister. Chae wrapped her arms around him and held him close,” Your sister. What’s her name?”
“Ha-Ri,” he sniffles.
Chae runs a hand through his hair,” I’m sure she’s okay. You just gotta have faith. Losing faith in a world like this is what’ll change you. She’s gotta be okay. There’s nothing stronger than a siblings love for each other. She’s probably looking for you right now,” Chae whispers, comforting him.
She hoped Ha-Ri was okay, for Wu-Jin’s sake.
She hoped her dad was too, for if he were to be gone, she doesn’t know how she’d cope.
#jang wujin#lee suhyeok#yoon gwi nam#all of us dead#cheong san#wujin x reader#all of us are dead#aouad fanfic#aouad x reader#choi nam ra#nam onjo#kdrama
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#244: Making a Mess
I hate writing terrible first drafts. Just piling words onto the page without thinking about the consequences too much. I know that terrible first drafts should have flaws — that’s the whole point. If it doesn’t suck then it isn’t a terrible first draft. But knowing about those issues and moving on makes my brain hurt.
I’m not entirely sure why this happens. I am aware of all the advice. You can always fix it later. You can’t edit a blank page. Anything is better than nothing. Sure.
Knowing something and being able to act on it are two very different things.
It could be a case of simple risk aversion. Perhaps I’m worried that by moving fast without taking time to thoroughly think about every twist and turn in the story, it’ll end up being a giant mess.
Cooking is a good analogy for this. Some people clean up as they prepare their meals. It takes longer, but you don't have to do all the cleaning after you eat. I do this pretty often.
People on the other end of the spectrum pretty much trash their kitchen every time they cook. They use as many pots, pans and plates as they need and leave them dirty all over the place. Whatever it takes to make their meal faster.
The difference between writing and cooking is that cooking is a lot more predictable. You're either following a recipe or doing something you've done many times before. You know all the steps ahead of time so a little detour here and there won't affect you too much.
When writing, nothing is truly certain. You may have an outline, but that isn't set in stone. You could wake up tomorrow and change your mind if you come up with a better idea. Getting to the finished product as fast as possible is crucial because that's the only way to find out whether it'll work.
And so I'm here, learning how to make a mess, trying to convince my brain to let me write terrible first drafts. It's harder than it looks.
About the Author
Hi, I’m Radek 👋. I’m a writer, software engineer and the founder of Writing Analytics — an editor and writing tracker designed to help you beat writer’s block and create a sustainable writing routine.
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Past Editions
#243: Write the Worst Story You Can, April 2022
#242: The Art of Writing a Scene, April 2022
#241: The Writing Process, April 2022
#240: The Physics of Writing, April 2022
#239: Writing for Fun and Profit, March 2022
#writing#writers#write#writing tips#writing advice#amwriting#writing life#writing update#personal update#me#writeblr
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calling you daddy — monsta x
scenario: they ask about your kinks and you ask them to call you daddy
a/n: this is written with a fem reader in mind but is not strictly fem reader as no pronouns or anything is mentioned.
a/n: was this a request? nope tbh this was written for myself bc i’m sick and tired of seeing people call these men daddy so uh pls enjoy
word count: 2k
content: sub!monsta x, dom!reader, daddy kink obviously ajshdhs, minhyuk is kinda bratty? kinda??, lots of teasing and begging, mentions of consent and stuff
—
son hyunwoo/shownu:
he falls silent. he doesn’t know what to say in the slightest. he worries that he might hurt your feelings or say something out of line, but it just stuns him, “you don’t have to do it if you’re uncomfortable with that, bear. your consent is just as important,” you say.
but see that’s half of what’s stunning him. he’s not exactly uncomfortable with that. shownu’s nature is pleasing you, he doesn’t mind filling any role or position for you, this was just a little more intense than that.
“you know what? just forget we had this conversation. i don’t want you to feel pressured, and it’s not a big deal, okay?” you say.
but the idea lingers in his head whether or not you want it to. as the days go by, his mind wanders, and while it may not exactly be what he’d be into, he’s not against doing it for you.
as you manhandle him a little bit, he says it softly, “ah, daddy-,” it’s even more embarrassing than he imagined, and his cheeks and ears are flushed and hot, but when he says it, softly under his breath, just whispering it out to test the waters, he sees your shock and then your small little smirk.
“now that i know what it sounds like to hear you say that, and what that does to me,” you say, sneaking your hands under his shirt and letting them wander, playing with his chest a bit, “i don’t think it’s a good idea to say that if you wanna make it out of this bedroom spotless and in one piece.”
he blushes even more, a little shy and hesitant, but he likes having this kind of effect on you, so that may not be the last time he says it. besides, who says he cares if he makes it out in one piece? and spotless? his neck and chest and thighs were too clean anyway.
lee hoseok/wonho:
it was in the middle of you riding him, his wrists bound above his head with a rope that made his skin look so pretty against it. he’s already cum once, but you’re not stopping until you do, and he’s trying to keep himself together. your hands roughly playing with his chest is overstimulating and he’s overwhelmed. he pleads for mercy aimlessly, almost thoughtlessly.
but then, “if you’re gonna beg, call me daddy,” you murmur. he’s not even sure he hears you right when you say it. he looks at you with wide eyes, and he assumed he did because of the way you act. he knows he could stop you at any time because you’re very clear on consent and it’s not like this was completely out of left field considering how you’re already always in charge in the bedroom. he was just stunned.
and while he’s a little bit stunned, he also won’t deny that it is a little bit hot.
so he does, “please, daddy, it’s so much- i- i can’t handle it.”
he sees your smile, with just a drop of sadism behind the curl of your lip, “just a little more, baby, i’m close. you make daddy feel so good,” he gets so excited by the praise that he attempts to stick it out, forever still the man that just wants to make you happy and please you.
he forgets about himself and his own body for a moment when he feels your body tense up around him and you hold onto his chest as you orgasm, using him to get the most out of it before you slow down to a halt.
your heavy breathes and sweet nothings whispered in his ear are heavenly.
lee minhyuk:
“really? you’re into that? i honestly thought it would be the other way around.”
taken aback, you ask, “really? what gave you that impression?”
“idk, you don’t have this aura of dominance, so i didn’t really assume that was your thing.”
“is that- is that okay with you?”
he gets closer, teasing in the way he wants to make you shy, “you seem pretty bashful for someone who just asked to be called daddy in the bedroom.”
“minhyuk-,”
he rolls his eyes, obviously trying to get a rise out of you, “come on, i don’t even know if you have it in you.”
and something about his careless, taunting tone sets something off inside you, like he was challenging you. but it’s a challenge you take on when you approach him. your touch is softer, lighter than he imagined. he thought you would be lit aflame with a need to prove yourself to him. but you lean in to press a kiss on his neck and your wandering hands settle on his hips.
you’re gentle with him initially, yet he melts a little bit when one hand tightens and another begins to unbutton his shirt, giving your mouth access to his chest.
you push him onto the couch, straddling him and using a hand to hold both of his arms above his head, when you pull back, he looks dazed and needy, all those teasing smirks having faded off his features, “why are you so affected? i thought i didn’t even have it in me,” you say with a smirk this time.
he breathes heavily, “y/n- please-”
“oh please, that’s not my name anymore, min.”
yoo kihyun:
“you want me to what?!” his voice is randomly high pitched, loud, almost like he’s nervous or scared.
despite that anxious feeling you’re feeling too, you try to stay calm, “i understand if you’re uncomfortable by it, but you asked about my kinks, kihyun.”
“yeah i know- i just- i wasn’t expecting that- really? you’re not messing with me? that’s really what you want?” he looks exasperated.
“yes. i really want you to call me daddy.”
he goes silent, trying to comprehend in his head what the hell was going on and what he was going to do and why the more he thinks about it, the less vehemently against it he becomes. and he had spent the entire relationship making it clear that he cared about what you wanted (because he does) and it’s not like… he hates the idea of it, but it’s just so out there to him that he can’t even fathom or imagine it.
he asks for a few days just to think about it, and though the awkwardness lingers in the air, by the fourth day, it seems like you had mostly forgotten about it or at least it didn’t seem to be on your mind. he spends those days really thinking, trying to imagine what it would be like, why you would even want that.
but the next time you’re together alone, your hands and lips are on him and he experimentally says it, “daddy, please.”
the whiny, begging voice, coupled with the word, leave you stunned. you pull back with wide eyes, and he felt so embarrassed and shameful with your eyes on him like that, but then you pulled him back into you and kissed him with a certain kind of feverish desperation that made his knees weak.
chae hyungwon:
his reaction is oddly pretty calm. he asked about what you were into, and you told him. maybe he was expect something a little different, but to be honest, he knew you liked to be in control, and he usually just went along with it. he didn’t mind it especially because you always made sure you both felt good and that was all that matters. that and he kinda likes being told what to do.
so it doesn’t exactly surprise him, especially when you add, “but only in a sexual context! i don’t need you to say it all the time.”
“good because there’s no way in hell i’m calling you daddy in front of my friends,” he can see the thoughts behind your eyes wanting to take up that challenge, but he decides to ignore it, “as far as they’re concerned, i’m daddy.”
“sure, wonnie. sure,” you say dismissively, before looking back at him, “are you actually okay with it though? i know it’s… weird.”
“it wasn’t what i was expecting, but if that’s what you want, then i’ll do it.”
and as soon as you’ve got him under you, with kisses and marks trailing down his neck and chest, leaving him helplessly turned on and horny, he says it so naturally, you wonder if he even thought to do it. but whether or not he’s doing this solely for you, or because he might have found it a little hot, is between him and himself, “ahh, daddy, please- be gentle with me- i have a photoshoot in the morning- oh my god that feels so good please daddy don’t stop-”
lee jooheon:
he likes the idea of it when you mention it, he just gets kinda shy, “do you- do you really want me to call you that?”
you come closer, holding his hand and rubbing your thumb against it in a comforting manner, “yeah, i really like the idea of it. if you’re not completely against it, i’d be really happy if we could try it.”
“it’s not… the worst thing you could have told me you were into,” he laughs as your hand starts to massage his thigh instead, “we can try it. i'll tell you if we need to stop, but i think it’ll be okay.”
“good, i’m glad you’re reacting this way, honey,” you murmur as you kiss him, and he smiles, which, even if it makes the kiss a little awkward, is really cute, “sweetheart,” you whisper as you pull away, “can you say it? i just wanna hear you say it.”
your hands wander his skin nervously, he can tell you’re worried about him being uncomfortable, “ahh, d-daddy, please touch me more,” he whines, and he’s never been more compelling before, but somehow the use of that word really makes you want to give in and give him anything he wants, “please touch me.”
your hand falls a little lower upon his request, and he groans lightly, pulling you a little closer, “you’re perfect, baby, so pretty.”
“ahh, please,” he huffs, clearly growing shy with the praise, but it’s obvious he really likes it, so you touch him more and whisper sweet words into his ear with a kiss, “oh- oh my- daddy- please i-”
“you’re so cute, sweetie pie, especially when you’re feeling good, you look so pretty and content. it’s my favorite sight,” you say adoringly, looking at him with the biggest heart eyes.
“wow, i didn’t expect to like this this much but-“ he whispers, “-i kinda love it.”
im changkyun/i.m:
he doesn’t react much when you say it, making you wonder if he was uncomfortable or not into it, but in any case, you assume it’s going to be forgotten in a few days and there would be nothing to worry about.
until he’s trying to get you to play with him and you’re trying to work. he can’t deny that he gets horny easily and you’re right there! he tries to tease in an way he can think possible, but to no avail. you’re still just sitting there, typing away on your laptop.
“just another thirty minutes, and then im all yours, baby,” you murmur to him, and he pouts subconsciously out of frustration.
he gets an idea, and i’m sure you know what it is.
“alright, you’re busy and i respect that. i guess i’ll just leave you be and go play by myself, daddy,” he giggles when you look over at him for the first time in this encounter and then he walks away.
as he sits on the bed in your bedroom, he awaits the sound of your footsteps, knowing he’s won. the door opens, and you walk in too casually, enough to make him suspicious, until he’s pulled onto your lap with your lips on his shoulder. your hands sneak under his hoodie, and his hands brace himself on your shoulders for stability, “ah- y/n-”
“baby, i did not set aside my work that’s due tomorrow morning to come fuck your brains out just for you to call me that,” he shivers, so incredibly turned on, “try again.”
—
taglist: @lovingonrepeat @neosincity @sub-hoshi-enthusiast @multidreams-and-desires @hobilluvvr @vanillaknj @yr-domxfantasies @treasure-hwa @fleurshopsub @rubyscloud9 @silencefavarchive @nct99 @bigkpopstan @monstaxdirtywonk @domreaderrecs @mochi-ficz and always feel free to ask to be added to/removed from the taglist <3
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A Storm
“I promise you.” Bruce had said. “If you come home, I will keep you safe. I will keep them safe. I will keep us whole. I promise.”
Tim is taken. Each of his family react differently.
There’s a rushing in Tim’s ears. Like a waterfall. It’s so loud he can’t see. Can that happen? Can noise affect sight? He doesn’t know.
There’s a hand on his back. Gentle, but firm. He thinks maybe someone is talking to him, but he can’t see. He can’t see anything over the rushing in his ears.
No, that’s not right. He needs to start again. Try again. He squeezes his eyes shut tight, covers his ears, takes a deep breath.
“Tim?” Is it Bruce? Someone’s hands are on Tim’s arms, pulling his hands from his head. The person in front of him is stooping slightly, so they can look him in the eye. “Can you hear me?”
“'m fine.” Tim says. But his eyes can’t focus, it’s too loud in here. “I just need, I… just need t’sleep.” He grimaces, the noise too bright for his eyes.
There’s more sound then. Voices he thinks, but he’s not sure. He can’t see who they belong to. Then there’s a hand around his ankle, gripping him roughly. He flinches in the hold, starts to struggle as his shoes are removed. Then his socks. What is going on?
His feet? What about his feet? He tries to speak, but it’s so loud in here, he can’t form the words. A forehead presses against his, green eyes bore into his own. Jason?
Hands hold his feet to the floor, press down. More talking. It could be shouting now.
The hands let go of his feet. Move to his face. “Your feet, Timmy. Concentrate on your feet.”
Tim opens his eyes. Jason is still there, his bright green eyes, searching and insistent. “'m home?” Tim mumbles.
“Concentrate on your feet, Timmy. What can you feel?”
Tim closes his eyes again. His feet. He can feel… wood. Wooden floor. Wooden floorboards and the thin gaps between them. The Manor floor. The Manor.
“Yeah, Timmy.” Jason says. His hands move from Tim’s face, pull the teenager into a bear hug. “You’re home. You’re home.”
~~
Leslie pushes her glasses back up her nose. Lets out a sigh. “It’s just going to take time, Bruce.” She says. She’s firm, as always. But there’s a softness in her eyes. A sadness. “Like all things.”
Bruce doesn’t speak. Just rubs his face with his hands. Hangs his head.
“Why is he so disorientated?” Dick asks. His right hand is still bandaged up, swollen, but it’s no longer bleeding through.
Jason sucks his teeth from where he’s leaning against the wall, his arms crossed. Leslie and Dick both ignore him.
“Sensory deprivation, especially for so long-- it can take a little while to recover.” Leslie is matter of fact. There’s no point mincing her words. “You have to take it slow.”
“Touch is best to start with.” Jason says, pushing himself off the wall. “It’s grounding.”
Dick, Leslie and Bruce look over at him. He shrugs. “It worked for me.”
A pained look crosses Dick’s face. Leslie interrupts before he can speak. “Let Tim lead, let him set the pace.” Her words hang in the air. “It’ll take time. But he’s strong.” She says. “He’ll pull through.”
~~
Dick wakes up in a sweat, breathless. His right hand is throbbing. He tries to flex his fingers, flinches as his broken knuckles protest. It’s not the worst injury he’s ever had. Not by far. But the way he got it…
He shakes his head, tries to dislodge the memory of a shattered eye-socket, a dislocated jaw, a cracked skull. Tries to shed the jarring realisation that he broke his hand on a man’s face. Tries to make himself at least feel a sense of responsibility for the damage done. He doesn’t.
He makes his way to the kitchen, pads barefoot through the Manor. He pulls an ice-pack out of the freezer, holds it on his aching fist. The cold seeps into his joints, consumes the burn of displaced bone and absent guilt. He feels calmer.
Touch is grounding, Jason had said. Dick doesn’t want to think about how the younger man, his younger brother, knew that. Doesn’t want to know which one of a lifetime of traumatic experiences had taught him that little gem. But he can’t dispute it. The touch of the cold helps.
He makes his way back upstairs. Turns left, instead of right. To Tim’s room.
The door is pulled to. The most Alfred would allow. Bruce had been adamant about staying by Tim’s side, so had Jason, so had Dick. Alfred had refused all of them.
“Wayne Manor is the safest, most secure building on the eastern seaboard, if not the entire continent. None of you will do Master Timothy any good if you don’t get some sleep. He will be safe, in the meantime.”
Bruce had tried to protest, Jason had made threats, all but hissed at Alfred’s suggestion. The older man hadn’t budged. “I will stay with Master Timothy. In case he wakes.”
He wasn’t wrong. They needed rest, all of them. The search had been… long. Too long. Desperate, and increasingly frantic with each passing hour. And there had been so many hours.
He swallows down a memory. Of the howl that felt like it had been ripped out of his soul when they found Tim. Dick hadn’t even realised the noise had come from his own mouth, didn’t notice the tears of rage on his own face, as he took his hands to the men holding Tim captive. Broke his hands on the men who had taken his brilliant, darling brother. Locked him in the dark, alone, for too, too long.
Dick hovers outside Tim’s door. Holds his ear to the wood. He can’t hear anything over his own breathing, his own heartbeat.
“Just open it, Dickhead.” It’s Jason. He's dressed in a spare pair of Bruce’s pyjamas. Despite his size they're somehow still too big for him. It makes him look young. Too young. Dick stares at him for a moment before doing as he says.
The pair of them fill the doorway. Wait as their eyes adjust to the light in the room. Gloomy shadows fall in through the window; the blinds have been left open. Dick’s eyes scan the bed but his ears hear Jason’s breathing hitch. He feels the younger man go rigid beside him, knows his own body has responded the same. Because Tim is gone. Again.
Panic forces itself into what little space is between them, and Dick is only vaguely aware that Jason is gripping his wrist. Holding him too tightly, clinging onto him as though he’s scared one of them will disappear too.
A small cough brings them back to their senses. Alfred. The older man is sat in the corner of the room, by the window. A patient vigil in the dark. He nods to the far side of the bed.
Jason all but drags Dick with him as he marches into the room. They stop just past the bed. Tim is asleep on the floor. He’s curled into a ball, a single sheet held tight over his head. Dick only knows it’s him from the tuft of hair that’s sticking out.
He feels Jason let go of his wrist. The younger man stumbles backwards. He nods to Alfred then leaves the room, gone as quick as he entered.
Dick watches him go, a new worry blooming in his chest. He looks at Alfred, and the older man shakes his head sadly.
~~
Jason is in his old room. His old en-suite more accurately. His knees protest against the tile as he wretches into the toilet.
I am safe, I am warm, I am whole.
He repeats the words in his mind like a mantra. Tries to control his breathing. He fails. Another wave of nausea has him wretching again. Acid burning its way up his throat.
A hand presses to his back and he flinches. He hadn’t heard anyone come in. Bruce places a glass of water on the floor beside him, pushes his hair back from his face.
Jason wipes his mouth on his sleeve, takes a shaky sip of water. Bruce rubs circles on his back.“Don’t.” Jason croaks, and he hates himself when the warmth of the hand is removed. He looks up at Bruce. “You promised you’d keep them safe.” He says, and he can’t keep the hurt out of his voice. Can’t keep the tears from his eyes. “You promised.”
“I know.” Bruce says. He pulls the younger man into a hug, holds him tight against his chest. “I’m sorry.” His son’s tears soak through his shirt.
~~
Jason doesn’t know how long they sit there. Tangled limbs on the cold, hard tiles of the bathroom floor. Only knows that he needs Bruce to let go. He pulls himself out of his father’s arms, pushes himself to his feet. He needs to brush his teeth.
Bruce sits on the floor behind him, as Jason scrubs the bile and acid from his mouth. He presses too hard with the toothbrush, can taste the copper of blood against mint. But the dig of the bristles in the soft flesh of his gums is grounding. Reminds him he’s still alive.
I am safe, I am warm, I am whole.
Jason can remember sleeping on the floor. He’s slept on so many of them. The dingy corner of their apartment growing up, when all they could afford was a single mattress and Willis refused to let him share. The cardboard box by one of the subway vents behind the old Monarch Theatre. The floor of this very bedroom, the bed too soft for him to sleep in, threatening to drown him as soon as he fell asleep. Then the streets again, when he had wandered aimlessly after his death.
He can remember the dark too. Of being locked in a closet and forgotten for days at a time, when his infant crying became too much for Willis. Of his eyes swollen shut as the Joker beat the life out of him. Of his coffin, as he lay there screaming for Bruce to save him.
Jason’s life was a short but terrible history of hard floors and dark rooms and Tim’s was never meant to be like that.
They’d found him in all but a box, eight feet by eight feet by eight feet. There were no windows, the door had been soldered shut. He was being fed once a day. Some bread and water slid through a hatch in the wall, and a bucket too. Swapped out every 24 hours. Nobody ever spoke to him, nobody ever asked anything of him. No-one ever demanded anything from them either, neither The Bats, nor The Waynes.
He spits into the sink. Toothpaste pink with blood. He rinses his mouth. Splashes his face. Takes a deep breath.
They just took him and kept him. Because they could.
Jason had known people like that too, once. If he clings to it, it’s the only thought that makes him grateful Tim has been left alone for so long. Even as it leaves a bitter taste in his mouth.
Coming home, coming back to his family had been as painful and awful as clawing himself out of his own grave. An endless fight against the pit and its madness, that drove him to hurt the people he loved. An ongoing battle against the deep, deep wound in his heart that The Joker still lived. And a terrifying, haunting fear that he would lose them again. That after all they had been through, after he finally got his family back, they would be taken from him and he would be alone once more.
“I promise you.” Bruce had said. “If you come home, I will keep you safe. I will keep them safe. I will keep us whole. I promise.”
Jason turns away from the sink. Walks back into his room. Leaves Bruce sat on the cold, tiled floor.
~~
Eventually Bruce pulls himself to his feet. Jason’s room is empty when he passes through. He doesn’t allow himself to wonder where he might have gone. Of all the broken promises he has made to Jason, he knows this one has hurt his son the most. That Jason’s single biggest fear is losing the family he has so desperately longed for, both of his lives. That Jason would rather never love at all, than love and lose it all over again. This time had been too close. For Jason. For all of them.
It had taken them too long to get a lead on where Tim was being held. Far too long. And even then, they couldn’t confirm an exact location. They’d had no choice but to split up. Cass, and Damian had joined the Titans on the West Coast. Dick and Jason had come with him on the East.
He pulls out his phone, checks on the location of Cass and Damian for the nineteenth time that night. They’re making steady progress. Will be in Gotham before sunrise. His arms ache with a desperate need to hold them, know that they are safe. To have the physical proof, that all his children are alive and breathing, in his hands.
It had taken him a long time to let go of Tim once they found him. To pass his sweet, brilliant boy over to Leslie, so she could check him over. Confirm he was okay.
Tim was older now than Jason had been when he… Tim was older, but he had still felt just as small and young and broken, when Bruce had lifted him out of that box they’d kept him in. Out of the darkness. His body weak and trembling.
It had been Tim who had been taken, but Bruce had looked at the body in his arms and seen Robin, limbs twisted and broken. Seen Nightwing, lips blue and heart stopped by a hand held to his face. Seen another Robin, sword run through him, splitting his battered body almost in two. Seen Red Robin, riddled with bullet holes, blood running out of every one. He had held Tim and seen everyone of his children dead in his arms. An endless cacophony of death.
He reaches Tim’s room. Stands in the doorway and hopes that Alfred can’t see him in the darkness. He tries to remember back to when he took Dick in. Tries to recall what, in the name of all the Gods, had possessed him to allow his child, his children, out into the night with him. Tries to remember how he reached the conclusion that he could risk their single precious lives for his own crusade. How he could risk their safety for a single second.
He steps into the room. Hears Alfred sigh from his seat by the window.
“Don’t ask me to leave.” Bruce croaks out. His throat is tight, trying to hold a tidal wave of emotion at bay. “Don’t.”
Alfred stands. “Of course not.” He says softly, and he gestures to where Tim is sleeping on the floor. “Did you get any sleep?” He asks.
Bruce doesn’t respond. Just stares down at Tim, eighteen but looking for all the world like the ten year old who had shown up on Bruce’s doorstep all those years ago. The sheet is twisted round his limbs, his face screwed into a frown.
“Why is he on the floor?” Bruce asks. Though he has a good idea already.
Alfred takes a steadying breath. “He’s been…” He pauses. “He’s been sleeping on the floor so long, it’s what he’s used to n—“ He cuts himself off abruptly, turns to the window away from Bruce.
Bruce feels a burn in his throat. Knows that Alfred is fighting down the same tears that he is. He places a hand on Alfred’s shoulder. “I’ll stay with him now. Get some rest.”
Alfred nods. Places a hand over Bruce’s but doesn’t look at him. “And you, Bruce.” He says and he leaves. Pulls the door closed gently behind him.
Bruce turns back to Tim. His darling boy. He kneels down, gently detangles the sheets from his son’s legs. Tim doesn’t stir. Bruce lies down next to him, lays the sheet over them both.
Touch is grounding. Jason had said. And it’s all Bruce can do not to pull Tim into his arms and never let go. But Leslie had said baby steps. So instead he settles for running his fingers through Tim’s hair and holding his face in his hands. Moves his head closer so he can feel the soft rise and fall of Tim’s breath.
This would have to do, for now.
#batfic#batfamily fanfic#red hood#red robin#nightwing#tim drake#jason todd#alfred pennyworth#dick grayson#bruce wayne#batdad#spbfic
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aggressive affection, i think
(part two here!)
[ @yourlocalsinnamonroll (hi!) sent me an ask to do more gen z headcanons and i started working on something for her, except it isn’t actually a set of headcanons, but rather a really long...one-shot? but anyway, i thought of actual headcanons that i can share now, so i can return to my ROOTS hopefully this will do in the meantime. ]
i’m not sure if this is something unique to younger people, but i am one hundred percent sure that younger people do it a lot, just going off of the behavior of my friends and i. (i’m gonna tell you now that this isn’t entirely sfw, so minors dni please and thank u)
but i’ve found that it’s pretty common for friends to be, like, aggressively affectionate with one another, for lack of a better phrase. if not aggressively affectionate, then just really flirtatious, often for no reason, and it is still meant entirely in a platonic sense. some examples of this that i have experienced include, but are not limited to:
“i’m gonna eat you,” “do u wanna make out,” “just remember, no matter WHAT happens, i will ALWAYS wanna make out with you,” “i have literally wanted to fuck all of you at some point,” “let’s have sex,” “stfu before i kiss you,” [points to lap] “is this seat taken?” “every day i’m like, ‘wow, [name] is so cool, we should make out,’” and so on and so forth.
so you can imagine the fun i’m about to have.
lucifer
“blindsided,” does not even begin to describe what you’ve done to this man. while his recovery time was quick, he was still so, so confused.
all he said was, “you look nice today,” why did you threaten to kiss him? was that even a threat?
he doesn’t know because you said, “stop before you get kissed on the mouth,” but it doesn’t matter because you failed to consider that he is obsessed with you in dire need of a kiss on the mouth, and you, silly thing that you are, just provided conditions under which he can get one.
that said, have fun trying to explain to this man that you were joking while he’s holding you against him with the most smug look on his dumb little face. if you don’t wanna kiss him, okay, but by the time he feels like letting you go, your face is gonna be scorching and you will have properly learned not to do that again. unless you enjoyed yourself, in which case—
by the way, if you believe in a higher power, you had better pray he doesn’t do this to you because now that you’ve planted the idea in his villainous little brain, he’s just biding his time. so the next time you compliment him innocently, and he says, “be quiet before i kiss you,” like the monster he is, assert your dominance by kissing him first, it’s the only way to maintain your dignity.
mammon
why would you do that to him. he is literally in love with you, you can’t be doing this. he knows he’s an attractive person, but you can’t tell him that, and you especially can’t do it by flirting with him, it’s embarrassingly disarming. especially since he was going to make fun of you once he saw that you were looking at the issue of majolish with him on the cover. he had a plan and everything, and you ruined it. he was gonna say something dumb cool, after which you would be embarrassed , and he would laugh.
but then you looked at him, said, “i’m gonna eat you,” and his entire plan was thwarted. now you have to stand there and watch him struggle to form a sentence while his face gets red. you should take this opportunity to bite him, give him a little nom on the shoulder or something, just to razz him. it’ll be great, i promise.
luckily, he can’t even think about doing this to you without having to lie down, so you should be safe—unless, of course, he catches both you and himself by surprise. so if you get nommed on, you had it coming.
levi
you menace. you absolute villain. you’re laughing.
levi was about to go into a match he was nervous about, and then you said, “it’s okay, no matter what happens, i will always wanna make out with you,” and then he dropped his controller and blacked out, and you’re laughing.
you’re terrible. absolutely awful. acquaint yourself with shame while you blow cool air into his face and shake him awake.
when he does wake up, and he reminds you that he’s the avatar of envy, do nawt be surprised.
try to explain to him that you were kidding and let it slip that you say these types of things to everyone and you’re getting a tail around your waist. no matter how much he might stutter while he makes his point, the fact remains that he’s the only one you’re allowed to say these things to now. you can do it to the others while he’s not around if you feel so inclined, but he’s going to find out eventually, so good luck explaining yourself while he doesn’t keep his tail still when he uses it to hold you in place.
your only saving grace here is that he is physically incapable of doing it to you, but, you know. that probably gets overridden by how possessive he’s gonna get.
satan
you’re deranged. or just really confident. or a fool. it doesn’t matter, you fucked up. he said a normal thing, and then you threw him for a loop.
you were nervous about an exam the next day, he said, “you’re a capable person, you have nothing to be worried about.”
and then you, evidently forgetting that he is not one of your human friends, said, “flattery will get you made out with,” and tried to walk away.
first of all, how was that flattery? he was stating a fact. second of all, who said he didn’t wanna make out with you🤨. he never said that, you are making assumptions about him and his character.
anyway, he has no idea where you think you’re going, but you didn’t make it very far before he caught up to you anyway.
when he repeats what you said back to you in the form of a question, with that deceptively polite look on his face, know that he is being rhetorical. do not bother trying to explain yourself, it’ll be difficult to do so in a convincing manner while he’s backing you up to the nearest wall. do not be surprised when he takes this opportunity to blindside you with praise, directly into your ear, with that fatally smooth voice of his. and do NAWT be surprised when he pulls back and says, “why am i not being made out with?” with a dumb little smile. it brings him a lot of joy to see you squirm.
you don’t even have a saving grace here. this man is ruthless, he’s gonna do this to you literally whenever he wants, and he won’t even let you look away, let alone run away, so find joy in the monster you have created.
asmo
listen. unless you are genuinely empty headed, there is absolutely no way you did this on accident.
he wasn’t even doing anything out of character either, it was the middle of self-care night, he was putting moisturizer on your face for you, and he went, “you’re even cuter up close,” which is a normal, tame thing for him to say.
so unless you just have uncontrollable knee-jerk reactions, no way did you say, “so make out with me then,” to this man, by accident.
you’re lucky he has some knowledge of the fact that you sometimes say things that aren’t smart, so he didn’t just immediately jump on you; however, you are by no means in the Clear.
you blinked and he was nose to nose with you and basically in your lap. now you have to deal with his wandering hands while you try and explain yourself—that is, if you can even overcome how flustered you are, which you probably can’t. luckily, he knows you probably didn’t mean it, but he’s still asmo, so he takes it upon himself to be respectfully heinous like the gentleman he is.
so when he somehow manages to get even closer to you and says, “honey, you should really get a handle on those impulses of yours, unless you plan on following through,” like the bastard he is, know that from that point forward, whatever happens is on you.
here is another man with whom you have no saving grace; now that you’ve given him the idea that he can be more explicit with you,,, well.
beel
you’re a heathen. why would you do something like this. well, you know what, maybe you aren’t that much of a heathen, considering that you did bake cookies for him. that was really sweet of you, so he thanked you and complimented your skill, like a regular person.
so why, exactly, did you say, “i only accept thanks in the form of kisses, preferably with tongue,” ? something is genuinely not right with you.
now you have this man standing there, confused and red in the face. he’s trying to do the math, and nothing is adding up. like, it’s definitely doable, he can definitely do that, but, like, why would you make this request so suddenly?
this is probably the only instance in which you can coherently say, “i was kidding, you don’t actually have to do that,” and it almost doesn’t work.
you absolutely should not have been leaning against the counter because now he’s standing in front of you, and you have nowhere to run.
however, the thing about beel is that he is someone who flusters people without meaning to, so he has no idea of the effect that his, “are you sure?” has on you.
luckily, you’re still mostly coherent because you know that beel isn’t heinous like his brothers, so you manage to tell him that he doesn’t have to kiss you if he doesn’t want to because you were kidding.
you have every right to be surprised when, all of a sudden, you’re sitting on the counter, and he says, “why do you think i don’t want to?”
do you have a saving grace with this man? kind of. he would never say what you said or something similar, but the next time he compliments you and you choose to be normal and say, “thank you,” he’s gonna ask if he should kiss you, so try not to collapse.
belphie
now. he isn’t the Worst Person you could’ve done this with. but by god you are out of your mind.
your first mistake was choosing to lie down next to him, not because you had plans to be a menace, but because he is always a menace and has a thing for reminding you, which he can do more easily when you’re in proximity to him.
so when he said, out of nowhere, “are you ticklish?” you should’ve just rolled away, which wouldn’t have worked, but it would have been less chaotic then saying, “you are legally required to make out with me before you try and find out.”
you said it so casually that he was almost stunned into staying still, but his recovery time was excellent.
the next thing you knew, you were laying underneath a very smug, very menacing man, who seemed entirely too prepared to listen to what you had to say for once.
“legally?”
okay, so, maybe you should’ve chosen your words more carefully, but he was seconds away from tickling you, so you didn’t exactly have time to defend yourself. you can never backtrack with belphie anyway, so it makes sense that you went headlong into your claim, telling him that yes, this is, in fact, the law of the land.
“i was never one to pay attention to the law, but since you’re being so insistent, i guess i don’t really have a choice—”
leave it to him to pretend like you’re a burden as if he isn’t literally head over heels in love with you like everyone else fond of you. bastard.
there is absolutely nothing to save you from this man. he isn’t tactful enough to wait for an opportunity to do this to you, like satan or lucifer, so expect to be Just Sitting There when he tells you that you’re required to make out with him right this instant—it’s the law.
#obey me!#obey me#obey me headcanons#obey me imagines#obey me lucifer#obey me mammon#obey me levi#obey me leviathan#obey me satan#obey me asmo#obey me asmodeus#obey me beel#obey me beelzebub#obey me belphie#obey me belphegor
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Possession
Chapter 1: The Princess Arrives
Structure. Maybe it was because he was a builder that he liked that word so much. He built structures, he knew how make four walls and a roof that wouldn’t come down on anyone’s head, he knew how to build a seat that wouldn’t give out under anyone’s weight, and he knew how to maintain it all and make it last. The small world he lived in demanded order and structure for everyone’s well being. Without it they would be sleeping on the ground, starving, and losing their minds. And if one cog in that machine didn’t turn as it should it affected every other part. Yes, the Glade had to be a well oiled machine functioning everyday as it should.
Thankfully there were no outside forces that tried to thwart that. The doors opened in the morning, they closed at night, and the box came every month. You could tell time by the Glade and its unchanging rhythm. After three years Gally knew it like his own heartbeat. He knew the answer to every problem that could crop up in his bit of the machine. He was good enough to be the Keeper of the builders at least. Maybe that’s why it hit him hardest of all.
Box day came like all the others before it, predictable and precise. But then the heart of the Glade skipped a beat and Gally’s own did too for the first time. Because in that box was something they would never recover from.
A girl.
That was the worst thing that ever could have come up in the box. The boys would lose their minds, they’d become distracted and competitive and the machine of the Glade would come to a rusty, grinding halt. Gally could see the writing on the walls: this was going to be bad.
She wasn’t awake, she was laying there almost peacefully and all the gladers remained eerily and unexpectedly silent, like they were waiting for someone to jump out and say it was all a joke and take her away, or if they stared at her long enough the mirage would fizzle out and it actually would be a boy like it was supposed to be. Alby and Newt carefully lowered themselves into the box so they wouldn’t startle her and Newt hesitantly checked for a pulse, letting out a breath as he nodded to say she was alive. Gally ran a hand over his mouth, feeling anxious but not wanting to look it.
She woke up slowly from a sleep she didn’t know she’d fallen into. Her eyes stared straight up at the sky before they started to focus on things like Newt and Alby and a whole crowd of boys looming above her. Gally waited for the scream, for the crying, shuck, even boys had screamed and cried when they came up. But she didn’t. She tried to sit up and winced, placing her palm over her eye and rubbing like her head hurt.
“You’re okay,” Newt said to her from where he knelt beside her.
“Do you remem-“ Alby started to ask her but was silenced by her holding up one finger.
“Just… give me a minute,” she requested as she pressed both palms to her forehead and brought her knees up toward her chest.
“Sure, no rush,” Newt assured her softly, earning a small glare from Alby who was more impatient and less coddling than him.
“Enough gawking, if you’re not a keeper get back to work,” Alby ordered the boys standing around whispering to each other and stifling giggles behind their fists.
Gally narrowed his eyes and shook his head at them. Weak willed hormonal morons. They were all shucking doomed. Slowly the boys began to shuffle off, the ones catching Gally’s glare wiping the smirks from their faces and moving even faster. He sighed to himself knowing their work was going to suck if it got done at all.
Gally stood around with the other keepers, his arms crossed as they all waited for whatever would happen next. The girls hands came away from her face and she held one out in front of her, seeing the tremors running through it and making it shake before she clutched her knees and took a deep breath.
“Okay… now, what?” she sighed, looking up at Newt and Alby, her eyes squinting in the sun.
She was cute, of course she was cute, she couldn’t ruin their lives if she wasn’t cute, Gally thought to himself as he looked away from her.
“Do you remember anything?” Newt asked her nicely.
She zoned out on the middle ground ahead of her and let a breath out through her lips. “Water is wet, the sky is blue, that kind of stuff. I can’t even remember my name,” She said, her shaking hands pushing her hair back from her face as that realization set in.
“It’s ok, it’s alright,” Newt did a good job of keeping her calm. “That happens to everyone who comes here. Sad to say that’s normal. Most of us eventually remember our names at some point though, so don’t worry too much.”
“So if I were to ask you where we are and why we’re here you wouldn’t even know?” she asked as she turned to him, causing him to rock back on his heels a little bit.
“Unfortunately that is correct,” Alby spoke up, earning her attention. “But we will tell you everything we do know, starting with the fact that… you’re the very first girl to come here in three years. So we kind of have a lot to talk about.”
She squinted up at him for a beat before asking “Am I dreaming?”
“I bet you would think being the only girl in a crowd of boys would be a dream,” one of the other keepers said, drawing those eyes of hers to him.
“Nightmares are dreams too,” she pointed out.
Gally felt the corner of his mouth twitch like he might have chuckled at that.
She got out of the box on her own, climbing onto a drum of drinking water and then the rest of the way. Alby and Newt took a hand to get out and Gally figured the girl wasn’t keen on being touched just yet if ever. They let her have her way. They set off for the gathering room, the girl carefully encircled by the keepers to either keep her from running off or keep anyone from running up to her. Alby yelled for someone to go unload the rest of the box and the girl flinched.
She wasn’t as short as Gally expected a girl would be, but of course she was a lot shorter than him. At least not all the boys were that much taller than her which might tip things in her favor slightly if anything were to happen. Gally would have to pay attention to how intimidating he was now. It was never an issue with the boys, it was quite essential in fact. If they weren’t a little scared of someone then nothing would get done. But just looking at her he could tell that he absolutely could overpower her without breaking a sweat, and she would most definitely put that together too, so he had to make sure he never gave her a reason to think he actually would.
They started the gathering with the basic Greenie intro to the Glade. This was usually handled by one person who took the greenie on a tour around the Glade, but this was not the usual greenie. Gally was actually glad she was out of sight of the boys who were supposed to be working.
He rested his elbows on his knees to keep his leg from jumping nervously as Alby and Newt explained the basics and each keeper explained what they did. Gally kept his eyes down, unintentionally staring through the spot where her feet were. As the builder he was running through all the work he would have to do, he’d have to build a safe place for her to sleep and wash up, how exactly was he going to do that, he’d never had to do that before. When Alby called his name he was almost startled. He looked around and found everyone looking back at him, including the girl. It must be his turn.
“I’m in charge of the builders. Pretty self explanatory,” he stated, holding her gaze for as long as he could manage. It wasn’t long.
“You’ve been surprisingly quiet, Gally,” Newt pointed out, looking at him curiously.
Gally didn’t like the attention. “Well, I am the one who has to do the most about this situation,” he pointed out. “Yes, she needs her introduction to this place, but while you’re telling it to her I’m sitting here thinking of how I’m going to build a safe place for her to sleep and to wash up. I’m thinking up the plans now so I can get to work first light and just maybe she’ll have a place to sleep by sundown tomorrow. So what are we going to do for her tonight?”
Alby pinched the bridge of his nose as his face scrunched up, realizing that they had lot of work ahead of them. When Gally had finished his rant he thought the girl was sitting a little smaller in her seat.
“The gardening shed,” Newt blurted. “Remember the time the rakes fell over? We couldn’t get in, you had to take the door off. There’s no windows either. It’s not the best accommodations but on short notice at least it’s a place where no one can get in.”
Gally had started nodding, remembering exactly what Newt was talking about and it was a good idea, at least for one night. “We’ll move out some of the tools and put a cot in,” Gally thought aloud.
“She can take mine,” Minho volunteered.
“Are you sure? Aren’t you running tomorrow?” Newt pointed out.
“Yeah,” Minho shrugged. “Maybe one of the other runners will let me use his cot, but I can’t volunteer anyone else’s but my own. Besides, it’ll be one night, two tops with Gally working on it.”
Gally was surprised to hear him say something vaguely nice about him. But most of all he was planning, drawing blueprints in his mind of the safest, most anti-boy structure he could possibly make. He was going to put the Princess in the tower.
@poulterholland @anniemylennox @crazysheeplyca @thesuitkovian @Poulterjonas @gladerscake @carp3d1em @neilox
If any of you don't actually want to be tagged in the future just let me know, I was just trying to remember the ones who were really interested in the last short Gally series I wrote.
Possession Masterlist
#gally#tmr#tmr gally#tmr gally imagine#gally imagine#gally fanfic#tmr fanfic#tmr gally fanfic#maze runner#maze runner gally#gally maze runner#maze runner fan fic#will poulter#will poulter protection squad
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Slumbering Hearts (Alcina Dimitrescu/Reader, Soulmate AU) Pt. 1
Fandom: Resident Evil: Village
Rating: T for language/brief nudity
Warnings: None
Summary: In a wicked twist of fate, you find out your soulmate is none other than your employer, Lady Dimitrescu. To your misery, she (at first) seems equally displeased, her heart already belonging to another. But in time, the two of you find yourselves wondering... could the universe be right, after all? Soulmate AU in which every person has a unique "soul mark", which they share with their soulmate.
Notes: Reader is gender neutral, but at some points will be described as leaning towards being feminine (due to personal interpretation of Alcina's character). Additionally, Lady D will eventually be referred to by her first name, so don't worry if you feel weird about her being called by her full title all the time, it's just for this chap, when the reader isn't familiar with her. Lastly, this contains a bit of one sided Alcina/Miranda, which serves as a plot point, but is (clearly) not the primary ship.
1: In The Shadow Of Giants
Three months, two weeks, and one day. That’s how long you’ve been at this accursed castle, serving cruel mistresses, having been plucked from your peaceful life in the village. Anger stains your every thought, slowly festering inside your chest. There is no cure, at least not without a fatal price, but there are mild remedies. ‘Tis not long before the other servants learn to give you the more physically demanding chores. Nothing numbs your mind quite the same way that chopping firewood does, though you often settle for hard scrubbing age-old tile. Every day ends with your muscles crying from the effort of it all. Every day… except today. Another servant, from the night shift, has been wounded severely, and her job was deemed too important to be foregone.
And, as such, she has been replaced. By you. For once, you turn in early, long before your clothes can become stained with sweat. Yet you aren’t happy, not when you know that this change will ruin your sleep for weeks to come. Even worse, it’ll be impossible to avoid your ‘employers’, whereas working the day shift meant almost never seeing them. So far, you have only seen them on four or five occasions. Hell, you’ve only met two of them, being Cassandra and Bela. Based on what others told you, the other two weren’t much (if at all) better. As you try your best to get some rest, only a single ‘positive’ thought runs through your head: Well, worst comes to worst, I’ll get killed, then I won’t have to worry about anything anymore.
---------------------------
“Remember: No talking unless you’re asked a question. The Mistress has had a rough morning, and this is her best chance at relaxing,” Juniper explains, for what seems like the eighth time since the two of you met. There’s a nervous energy around her, which does little to ease your own anxieties. If you heard correctly, she’s only been at the castle for a couple weeks, having previously worked for Mother Miranda. You’re not sure what would have caused the transfer, considering most who were ‘fired’ ended up dead. Something told you that it had to do with antsy nature. “Oh, and don’t leave unless dismissed, even once your part is done. We all need to be ready, in case Mistress- I mean, Lady Dimitrescu needs something. Sorry, I’m still getting used to how things work here.”
“As long as you don’t slip up in front of her and get us both killed, I don’t really care,” you replied, giving Juniper a level stare. Clearly unsure how to respond, she pauses for a moment, mouth opening then closing without a sound. Once she’s seemingly composed herself, you give a short nod and push open the door to the bathroom. Two other servants are already inside, and they flinch at your arrival, briefly mistaking you for their boss. “I can hardly believe they made me change shifts for this,” you add, under your breath, rolling your eyes. What was so important about making sure a few candles stayed lit? During bathtime? Maybe it was something you had to be a giant, vampiric noblewoman to understand. Regardless of your annoyance, you quickly get to work, striking the first of a couple matches. It’s a rather dull task. To think you would have preferred heavy labor to this.
Before long, the last flame springs to life, and Juniper dims the lights, allowing the candles to become the focus. At least one is scented, though you cannot place the specific kind. Less than a minute after the last one is lit, the door once again swings open, revealing your most elusive employer. She’s… more than you anticipated. In every conceivable way, truthfully. Taller, more graceful (even as she has to duck through the entrance), and, as much as you hate to think so, far, far more beautiful. If not for the warm lighting of the room, you would have worried about someone seeing your blush. Certainly I am not the first to react this way, you think, as you bow alongside the others.
“Yes, yes, get on with it,” Lady Dimitrescu says, with a sharp frown. Then she moves closer to the tub, which you imagine could fit half a dozen ‘normal’ people, and holds out her arms to her side. For a moment you’re confused, but you instinctively mimic the motions of the other maidens. Together the four of you reach for her robe, gently taking hold of it while she steps into the bath, before hanging it onto a nearby hook. A second later your entire world is turned upside down. You’re freezing in place, eyes wide, as the bare back of Lady Dimitrescu reveals itself to you. Yet this is not an instance of poorly veiled lust. No, it is equal parts horror and repulsion, for you find yourself staring at a distinctive soul marking.
One that matches your own.
Beside you, Juniper watches you with concern, silently urging you to stay silent. Neither of the other two servants seem to react, other than by taking a small step backwards. Unable to speak, let alone form coherent thoughts, all you can do is point a trembling finger towards the soul mark. It’s right in between Lady Dimitrescu’s shoulder blades. Once upon a time, you had marveled at the design, smiling every time you saw it in the mirror. Now, it might as well be the ugliest thing you’ve ever seen. Based on her expression, Juniper seems to agree, although for different reasons. As your hand drops back to your side, you try to compose yourself enough to focus on the task before you. Instead, someone breaks the quiet, boldly, daring to think that they would be rewarded for it.
“My Lady,” a servant says, stepping forward, shooting you a waywards glance. Instantly she has your employer’s attention, though that comes with the metallic sssssslk of her claws extending. There’s an unspoken threat that demands respect. None comes, however, just the frenzied words of a panicked maiden. “I know who your soulmate is, my Lady. I thought that perhaps you’d-”
“A name. Give me… a name,” Lady Dimitrescu interjects, claws still out and impatiently tapping on the tile floor. Tense, you start to step forward, wanting desperately to silence the treacherous maiden. But her tongue is faster than your fist, and soon enough your name is echoing through the room. “Oh? The one right behind me, hmm? Dreadfully convenient, really. Step forward, dear, and let me see the proof. Assuming it exists.” All eyes other than hers are on you, now. With a deep breath, you begrudgingly step in front of Lady Dimitrescu, trying not to even briefly glance at her chest (or worse, lower). One of her hands shifts, a long claw tilting your chin up. “Well?”
“Forgive the placement,” you mutter, awkwardly grabbing your shirt collar, tugging it down to reveal your soul mark, planted neatly on the center of your chest. If Lady Dimitrescu’s gaze wanders, it does so too quickly to be noticed, though she does make a low humming noise at the sight. Feeling much like a piece of meat on display at the butcher’s, you scowl deeply. Soon enough, but not as soon as you’d like, the claw under your chin retracts, and you once more cover up your soul mark. You can’t bring yourself to look your soulmate in the eyes.
“Hmm. Not what I expected. Not at all,” she muses, more to herself than to you, softly. Behind her, Juniper is sending you a sympathetic expression. All you can do, as Lady Dimitrescu judges you, is glare at the origin of this revelation. What did she think to gain by speaking up? Hadn’t she heard the same rumors that you had? Didn’t she know that your employer already loved another, even if that affection was unrequited? There was, simply put, no chance that you were the preferable option. Not when there was no race against neither time nor death. At best, you could be a distraction. Something to keep her mind off of the person she’d rather be with. “Go clean up, get some sustenance if you must, then go to my quarters. We will discuss this further there- after I am done here.”
With that said, she waves you off, letting you relax for the first time in several minutes. After giving a short bow, you immediately move to leave. On your way, you intentionally bump shoulders with the maiden who spoke up, sending her a glare, then give Juniper a nod of acknowledgement. Nervous wreck or not, she was the only person you ‘knew’ on the night shift. Not that such a thing would even matter soon. To think that we’ve been soulmates this whole time, you think, living in the same castle for months, never seeing each other. I wish things could have stayed that way. At least you’d have some time to process your developing situation. Though you doubted you’d have enough time.
---------------------------
In an unusual change of pace, Alcina dismisses the rest of her servants, long before her bath is done. They exchange glances before scattering to the winds. A heavy sigh leaves her lips, and she sinks lower into the tub. Of course I have a soulmate, she thinks, bitterly. I knew this. Knew that it wasn’t her, and yet still, I find myself surprised. Disappointed, even. How had an already rough evening gotten even worse? More than that, what was she supposed to do about it? There was a part of her that wanted to kill her soulmate. She figured that, with them out of the way, the universe might finally understand who she was meant to be with. After all, it wasn’t uncommon for ‘widows’ to be given a new match, and those were generally other ‘widows’. Considering that Alcina knew for a fact that Mother Miranda’s soulmate had long since died, she did not think that her hopes were beyond possibility.
But there was another part of her, quieter, that dared to be more realistic. If the universe said that this human, this tiny thing, was her soulmate… would it not make sense to at least try? What harm could it do, when her current love had been unrequited for so long? Was this not the end to several decades of loneliness? Damn it, she thinks, gripping the edge of the bathtub until her knuckles turned white. There was no denying it, now that a single drop of rational thought had corrupted her mind. Fuck it all, I hardly have a choice. Or anything to lose, for that matter. With her decision made, she rises to her feet, emotionally ready to face the unknown.
---------------------------
“Ah, so you do follow directions, after all. I half expected to learn that you had attempted to flee, or perhaps had a gruesome run in with one of my daughters,” Lady Dimitrescu chimes, as she ducks into her room. Inside, standing at attention, you await. All of your earlier nervousness returns, though this time it is tinged with your natural rage. Of all the monsters in the world, this was the one you were expected to love. It mattered not how tall she was, or how sharp her nails could be, or how fierce her loyalty to Mother Miranda. To you, it mattered that you had no choice in being here, that only a handful of servants had come to the castle willingly. It mattered that a single mistake could mean a cruel death. So you did not greet your soulmate with a smile, or excitement, rather with a forced bow and blank expression. Better to be dead than to fake true love. “Come now, do at least pretend that you are excited, for my sake. I have been waiting a century for this, after all.”
“Perhaps the universe found it difficult to find someone who could love you,” you say, the words tumbling out of your mouth, instant regret boiling up inside of you. What you expect is a swift death. What you get? A deep sigh, a scowl, a look of frustration. Still fearing your possible demise, you are quick to keep speaking. “Or maybe the universe heard me talk once, and struggled to find someone to tolerate me. Countless possibilities, a galaxy full of mysteries… and here we are. Forgive me for being crass, my Lady. I would blame it on my schedule change, but something tells me you would see right through that lie, yes?” Not like that was much better, you think, wondering how the hell you were going to survive this.
“You’re quite the character, aren’t you?... Do try not to make me regret this, I’d rather not kill my soulmate. Now, sit down, it’s about time for a proper introduction,” Lady Dimitrescu commands. Then she’s sitting on the edge of her bed, gently patting the spot next to her. Joining her is just about the last thing you want to do right now… but you obey nonetheless. Still, you angle yourself away from her ever so slightly, hoping the subtle body language would help you distance yourself from her. There’s something in her expression that tells you she knows exactly what you’re trying to do. “I am Lady Dimitrescu, though you already know that. You may call me Alcina… for now. Behave, or that is one of many privileges I will not hesitate to take from you. Understood?”
It takes all of your willpower to avoid rolling your eyes, but you manage, instead giving a short nod. This’ll be interesting, for sure.
#lady dimitrescu x reader#alcina dimitrescu x reader#alcina dimitrescu#lady dimitrescu#resident evil: village#re8 village#love this lady<3
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I didnt get time to write it down earlier, but im gonna try and do what he asked.
I’ll write it down here and see if I can relay it back to him later.
I’ve just gotta try and figure it out myself, first. He called me, after not hearing hardly anything all day I couldnt wait to talk to him and hear his voice. But he just wanted to ask me for a lift... It upset me at first. No “how are you, I’ve missed you, been busy today”, nothing. And we had plans cancelled last night and we havent set a new date to reschedule it. And now he’s got plans to go out. I’m happy he is going out with people, its just the fact that that was his priority over than plans we had. But oh well, thinking about it now its not a big deal, it was just in the moment I got abit heated over it. But yeah, I think the thing that acc upsetted me was that that was it, all he wanted to talk about over the phone was asking for a lift. Like I woulda preferred him acc talk about it? Say who’s going, who brought it up, idk just acc have a conversation. I think its coz Ive heard so little from him today, and yesterday too tbf. I’m not so meh about it now, but at the time of the call it had defo niggled at me. My mind makes me perceive things in the most worst light. It was just a question Georgia, he’s busy at work and its quicker to ask on a call than message me back, plus woulda looked rude to message me that after all the message I sent ? See it makes sense. Why can;t I think like this in the moment ?!?!? I’ve never driven to or thru walthamstow before, that’ll be interesting. I hope he gets drunk. Yes, a drunk Jordan and I can take him home !! I want him to have a good time out.
what was I even writing about again ? Oh how I felt/feel. Well atm I’m just ill and tired. Atleast I’m super busy at work that stupid shit doesnt have time to affect me. I’ve had some fleeting thoughts.. tryna think of what so I could maybe bring it up to him later... but they have gone, thats the thing, they come and go and then theyre gone. Idk how to talk about sommin that just flashes by in my head.
And omg yesterdayyyyy ! Like he’s asking whats wrong and its literally like someone in my head put everything in a bag and walked off with it. I had nothing to give him. And tbh I think its the way he asks? and the way he reacts? He thinks if he gets all strict he’ll get it outta me, but it shuts me off. Then he tells me to grow up, ugh I hate that. Again goes back to how he treats me. If I go nonverbal, I need a soft response. Like I have nothing in my head, therefore nothing is gonna come out??? So how is squinting at me and wording things in a mean way gonna help??? (see this is why I cant just let him read my blog, I feel like I word things in sucha mean way and I dont mean it to come across like that).
And then that just freaked me out more coz then he brings up that his sister wants me over for dinner.... Not like its hard enough meeting her when she knows the history of everything. To then see him be around Lottie.. I’m so scared to see it. To see him treat her how I want to be treated. Him being soft and caring and playful. Like I’ll get upset and jealous and thats so messed up ?? And thats just one layer to it ! I still feel like Lottie will compare me to Georgia. She loved that kid and I know the kid loved her too, I aint that way inclined so like of course shes not gonna like me the same ? And Lottie means alot to Jordan so if we don’t get along enough or whatever that worries me. What if he sees I’m shit with kids and that turns him off of me? Its all just too much. Ik I’ll have to face it one day and meet and interact with her but I really dont want to. You;re probs overthinking it again, but am I really ? Like we know if she gets the soft cutesty attitude and treatment that it’ll be horrible to witness, aint overthinking that ? true. But maybe he isnt like that with her ? Thought of that ? But he mostly likely is.. You’ll just have to grin and bare the experience wont ya. I just dont want little me getting hurt anymore. It’s sucha fuzzy and supressed part of me now. Maybe thats why I havent been okay lately.
Ive been feeling like I’m lacking something. I couldnt ever pin it. I always bring it back to me overthinking or being overly emotional or whatever. Like everytime I think “oh he doesnt want me as much anymore” or sommin he proves me wrong with his actions pretty soon after. But I still cant help feeling like theres sommin, idk if its missing or im not getting enough or what but idek what it is ? Am I making it up ? Well that’d be dumb, but you know you try to hurt yourself in weird ways. Youre probably convincing yourself youre not entirely happy because everything isnt tip top perfect but like ?? What is it then ? If it was real you wouldnt have to dig to find out, right ? Idk.
I dont even feel the same as to when I started writing all this. How tf am I gonna relay this onto him later ? ooooo now I just thought about what he said yesterday, thats a wholeeeee other thing imma be thinking about now. I wanna write it down but I gotta still get shit done before end of work. maybe later
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