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phoebe-delia · 1 year

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When This Is Over

YALL I FOUND THIS WIP IN THE DRAFTS OF MY SIDEBLOG FROM *LITERALLY* A YEAR AGO!!! Honest to god, NO idea if I've posted this already; I looked at my blog and at my tagged fics at @drarrymicrofic (wrote this for the now-old prompt: wedding btw) and I didn't see it so I'm going with it. I added an ending after "pretty damn impressive," and I made minor edits to the stuff I wrote before lol. Also this is an AU.

I don't care which china patterns we use; I'm sure you'll choose something delicate and ridiculously expensive and you'll insist on keeping it forever despite the fact that you'll also never let us use it again, let alone allow anyone else to touch it except for you. But it'll make you smile, and that's enough of a reason for me.

I'm going to wear dress robes, which you'll no doubt pick out for me. I don't know or have much of a preference as to what you'll wear, but I know you'll look gorgeous because when I see you wearing that outfit for the first time it'll be when you're walking down the aisle to meet me, and it'll be the best thing I've ever seen.

All I really care about for the planning, other than inviting all our friends and family, is serving good food and dancing to good music. I want us both to know every single song that the DJ plays, and can we please for the love of Merlin ask whoever we hire not to adlib or make commentary during the songs? It's so annoying when they do that. I want to listen to the song, not some stranger stopping the music to scream "WHAT" and "PUT YOUR HANDS IN THE AIR" intermittently into the microphone. And if I hear one—and I mean ONE—strangely upbeat or techno remix of a gorgeous ballad, I'm firing the DJ and plugging in my phone and playing music myself. I was scarred from the guy at Dean and Seamus's wedding who played a remix of "My Heart Will Go On." Scarred, I tell you, which is saying a lot for someone who is literally scarred in several places, and would probably be a prime test subject for a team of psychologists.

Anyway, where was I? Oh, yes, the wedding. As for rings, we're going to pick them out together. There's a jewelry shop in Diagon—well, there was before; I hope it'll still be there when this is all over. But if it's gone we can go somewhere else.

It's weird; everyone's talking about how we need to "make sacrifices" if we're going to defeat Him. But I don't think anyone understands that more than you and me. You sacrificed everything to show up to the Order headquarters, alone and asking for help, for forgiveness. And me—well. I haven't had much of a choice in what I've sacrificed. You did, though, and that's pretty damn impressive.

When this is over, I don't want to make a single compromise that impacts the grand scheme of my life. I want to be greedy; I want to be selfish. I want to grab happiness by the balls and never let it slip through my fingers.

I want to travel the world together. To lie on a beach until my skin grows flushed; hike up a mountain and feel my lungs burn. I want to feel my shirt stick to my skin from how much I'm sweating while we dance in a packed club, in a city where we don't speak the language; you'll move in close and grind your arse against me, throwing your head back against my shoulder to demand, through hot panted breaths, to take you home. I will, immediately, because of all the things I want for the rest of my life, you're at the top of the list.

I don't care where we are, or what we're doing, when this is all over. As long as I'm with you.

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ae-neon · 1 year

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Hello! I really like your blog and am interested in what you'll do with the ACOTAR universe via your rewrite. It's been really fun to follow! The question I wanted to ask would be along the lines of how the High Lords got bound to Amarantha and whether or not you want/plan to change it. In canon Alis jumps into this boring essay about how there was a ball and a toast and something was in the High Lords drink and bla bla bla. But that just felt unsatisfying and... unbelieveable? It just seems hard to imagine that all seven High Lords, especially one like BERON (I mean c'mon have we met the guy?) would fall for it. Tamlin and Rhys are both mentioned to have been suspicious, but you're telling me BERON, the oldest, scummiest, slimiest, male who lived through the war and probably witnessed Amarantha during her high general years, would fall for it? I assume that being the oldest High Lord means something! Cruelty, cunning, something! And that's not mentioning the other High Lords who are, at this point, mostly older than Tamlin and probably have the political savvy, familarity, and know how of faerie tricks and culture? Amarantha was known for her cruelty and prowess as the high general of Hybern. There is no way any of them, aside from just TWO, wouldn't be suspicious.

Also, I have to ask if you plan to fix the Alis info dump where all of this is revealed. I love Alis, but the writing choices in this series are questionable to say the least.

Sorry for this essays like ask! Love you and good luck on that rewrite!

Hello anon

Amazing question. I'm going to answer it fully because most of it is context and lore rather than plot (which is essentially the same as the first acotar book anyways)

But if you consider this spoilers for the acotar rewrite : A Grave of Thorns and Roses then be warned!

There is one key changes to make Amarantha becoming High Queen of a foreign fairy kingdom - especially one with 7 HLs believable: A lot of this power was voluntarily given.

Now how I tackled this is

Amarantha is not just a Hybernian general she is the KoH's daughter. Clythia is her twin.

Hybern is a city state rather than a huge nation. The island sits on a magical hotspot so the Fae there have specialised in sorcery and are feared and reviled for it

Clythia was an emissary working in Prythian. She was especially charming and helped their reputation

When the tide of the war changed, an alliance of certain courts turned to Hybern for help and Amarantha came with a host

Also I have tweaked the timeline. Beron was a young man during the war and is the only surviving HL of that era

That way when Amarantha defeats Jurian but refuses to leave Prythian, there really isn't anyone who can stop her. They gave their power and she helped them 🤷🏻‍♀️

There's other stuff but that goes into more unique spoilers so I won't say but I hope this was enough to answer your question!!

Edit: I forgot about the Alis part!

Alis is more Feyre's chaperone in this so she'll at least have space to spread her dialogue out 😒 but I don't think most of it'll be revealed by her anyways

#anon asks #acotar : the rewrite #acotar #a grave of thorns and roses #acotar fanfiction

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kyriolex · 2 years

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Hello Sunny-Pandas here! Firstly, I wanted to say Thank you for the Follow! 😊 (If you're wondering why I'm on Anon it's because my Naruto account is just a Side Blog lol)

Well I looked at the newest chapter, and it seems like a problem I had with Himawari's portrayal in the Manga seems to have been subdued a bit. While I believe that panel was almost certainly put in there because of the current anime arc, it still helps

I like Himawari's motivation for wanting to be a Ninja in the Manga a lot moreso than in the Anime

But either way, I'm just happy that she's going to become a Ninja in both the Anime and the Manga... Even if the way it happens is a very different way...?

You see, there's been a lot of debate upon whether or not the Anime and the Manga are now at odds with each other. (I mean they ALWAYS have been but this is now possibly the most egregious case that they have ever done)

However, Unlike everyone else, I personally don't really see the current Anime Arc as being too contradictory to the Manga panel? At least not YET anyways.

Firstly we aren't certain how this Anime Arc will end, but I get the feeling Himawari will still remain in the Academy by the time it's over. And if she does then they could very easily just make it so that Himawari just hasn't become a Genin yet by the time she sees the conversation between Hinata and Boruto in the Manga.

Or alternatively, like I said, that panel could just be Ikemoto (or whoever's writing) giving the current Anime Arc a shout out.

I mean there's no way them having Himawari decide to be a Ninja in the Manga at the exact same time as the Anime doing aHimawari Academy Arc is just a coincidence. I refuse to believe that so. Like I HIGHLY suspect that Himawari probably wouldn't have even appeared in this Chapter if it weren't the current Anime Arc going on right now. But you know, that's just me...

But I do have wonder, what's the Anime's reasoning for skipping so far ahead to get to Himawari's Academy days, when they could've waited for the Code Arc to come to pass (or hell even put it somewhere in the middle of the Code Arc)? That Arc is more or less right around the corner in the Anime anyways. 🤔

I've actually got a theory.

I get the strong feeling that the Timeskip is coming in the Manga soon, and if it is, then the Anime rushing to show Himawari joining the Academy might make more sense at least. Because by that point Himawari will be a lot older and a full fledged Ninja

Plus Code is currently releasing an Army of discount Freeza's and starting a War on Konoha, so maybe the Anime Team thought that it would be better if they did the Hima Arc sooner as there would be no time or place for Himawari focus during or after the Code Arc? 🤔

Anyways I am REALLY sorry for this long ass rambling. I got way more caught up into the subject than I ever intended to 😅 I just have a really bad habit of getting my thoughts across, especially if it pertains to Himawari! If you take one good look at my blog, you'll immediately know that I adore that little ball of sunshine! Lol

Hi Sunny-Pandas!

You're right, I don't think the manga and anime are THAT inconsistent. Academy usually lasts a whole year, right? I doubt Kawaki will be at school that long for his mission. This may just take place later in Himawari's school days.

I definitely think her manga motivation for being a ninja is much better than her anime one. Her attitude in the manga has the "wise-beyond-her-years" vibe that I love about Himawari. The anime's reason, however, is "I think being a ninja is fun (and no one in my life has bothered to tell me otherwise because they really want the prodigy Hyuuga to fight)."

That said, I think we all better enjoy the Himawari academy fluff while we can before the discount Friezas destroy everything.

#Himawari #boruto chapter 72 #boruto spoilers

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potofstewie · 2 years

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I posted 312 times in 2022

That's 312 more posts than 2021!

44 posts created (14%)

268 posts reblogged (86%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@comatosebunny09

@kyojurosfirelilyy

@kyojurosrealwife

@auraee

@gingerspicelattemix

I tagged 63 of my posts in 2022

#stew’s pot of thoughts - 29 posts

#kyojuro rengoku - 12 posts

#rengoku kyojuro - 8 posts

#kny rengoku - 6 posts

#rengoku x reader - 5 posts

#send helppp - 5 posts

#rengoku x black reader - 4 posts

#eren x black reader - 3 posts

#reheated soup - 3 posts

#selfreblog - 3 posts

Longest Tag: 73 characters

#yes this is me publicly admitting i have another one to add to my bd list

My Top Posts in 2022:

Der Engel miener Träume

Title Translation: The Angel of my dreams.

The lowdown: A frequent dream that Eren Jeager cannot get enough of.

The things to know: Reader is EXPLICITLY black, uses she/her pronouns, Fluff, Yearning, middle of the timeskip Eren (idk how else to describe him but like- a few months after he kissed Historia's hand)

W/C: 1.4k

A/N: Hey hey, this one is one of those spur of the moment ideas that I decided to expand upon GREATLY. One thing that helped inspire this fic was my fellow black fanfic readers and writers. I wanted this to basically be an ode to my black (aot) fandom members. I should probably start posing these to my AO3 but idkk yet. ANYWAY ENJOY MWUAH

See the full post

23 notes - Posted December 6, 2022

ok so- i was in the middle of rewatching euphoria and a angsty (is intense a better word?) fic idea came into my head:

what if, rengoku just absolutely snaps about his dad. not necessarily cussing him out (although that could work) but just venting to y/n over a bottle or two of sake. And y/n is lowkey frightended over how aggressive his speech is talking about him but just being a caring and listening gf

31 notes - Posted November 10, 2022

Confide in Me

The lowdown: An angry and battered boyfriend, a scared yet concerned girlfriend and a $2.58 pack of frozen peas

MEGA HUUUUGE SHOUTOUT TO @auraee FOR HELPING ME WITH THE CONCLUSION CAUSE A CHICK WAS LOST

Word Count: 2.8k

Pairing: Rengoku x Black Reader (other readers are welcomed)

The things to know: VERYYY OOC Kyojuro, Blood, Smoking, Mentions of Child Abuse, Physical Abuse (kyojuro and shinjuro), Angst, yelling, swears, Eating as a coping mechanism (Kyojuro), a pack of frozen sweet peas

A/N: Oh, my, GOOOD. I hate how long this took and I'm sorry for how long it took. I got sick with something and I couldn't figure out for the life of me how to end this properly. I was also on the verge of deleting this numerous times to just write a version in the canon setting but I didn't want this to go to waste. I'm so grateful for @auraee for looking at the conclusion and giving me confidence. Big ups my g I think after this, I'm gonna redo my masterlist and then finally move on to another baby daddy of mine (I'm fighting between Haganezuka and Eren.) Also can you tell that I finally figured out how to indent texts? lmao

See the full post

93 notes - Posted November 25, 2022

Morning Person

A/N: This is a small thing that I whipped up after seeing this drawing on pintrest. This is my first writing post so I hope the errors aren't so bad.

Established Relationship, Rengoku x Reader, Fluff

"C'mon Kyo, you gotta get up." You shook your boyfriend gently as you whined. Today was a beautiful day and you wanted to make the most of it since Kyojuro finally had a day off. A deep, disgruntled groan left the large lump in the futon, blond hair with red tips peeking out from under the covers. "I don't get it, you're always a ball of energy! How on earth are you like this in the morning?!"

You sighed loudly as the lump shuffled, trying to find a more comfortable position. A few low grumbles and whines errupted from the covers, a pitiful and indecipherable argument your boyfriend gave to you as his hand reached from under the bedding and fixed the sheets over his head. You watched silently as his body finally relaxed, a foot sticking out from the cocoon. "Kyojuro, today is so lovely out. Me and Senjuro wanna go fishing and we want you to tag along. C'moooon." You shook him again, this time more harshly but alas, he didn't budge.

"I plan on bringing my sweet potato pie, and Senjuro is taking salt grilled bream with us as well. There's way too much food for the both of us to eat. But, we can always give the leftovers to your father..." You taunted, hoping that the mentions of his favorite food would stir the Flame Hashira. After a few pensive seconds, a loud sigh released from the futon, with the disheveled creature slowly sitting up. Kyojuro's tired eyes looked at you with his wild eyebrows furrowing and a slight frown on his face. His bright mane sticking out in all directions, some of it sticking to his face. "Are you finally gonna come with us?" You asked, hopefully.

Kyojuro grunted, scratching his stomach. "Fine, in five minutes." He grumbled before harshly diving into the covers once more.

"Kyojuro!!"

119 notes - Posted November 8, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

Ask Again

The Low Down: A love story about a question that takes many forms but is always asked.

Word Count: 637

Pairing: Rengoku x Reader

The things to know: AFAB!Reader, fluff, slight angst, reader playfully insults

A/N: Aight, so this has been sitting in my head for like two days straight until I woke up in a cold sweat to write a really rough draft in my phone at 4am. However I'm glad that this is finally freed from the shackles of my mind.

See the full post

185 notes - Posted November 11, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

#tumblr2022 #year in review #my 2022 tumblr year in review #your tumblr year in review

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yourflowersfirst · 10 days

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day 1,431

okay, i'm gonna speak to you very candidly. i hope that's okay. i think conversation type writing is fun, and i'm in the mood for it. imagine this just two guys, getting dinner, chatting. well. i'm talking at you; you're half listening, half noticing the hot bartender in the corner, not noticing me so much. you steal a few of my fries. whatever. i'll take what i can get.

i've been a little sick all week. good enough to still do my assignments and go for runs and work, you know, manageable. today though, i woke up with a throat so agonizingly painful i could hardly swallow water (let alone those big ass dayquil pills). (but seriously, why are they so huge? it's hell for a sore throat.) something something big thing in my throat, there's a funny joke to be made there if you want. i don't care.

maybe i should stop going for runs when i'm feeling even a little sick. they probably don't help me, and my immune system is already ass as it stands. just to brag a bit though, i ran 6.5 miles earlier this week. i got my hair done the other day, but i've felt too sick to even wash it. do you know how heavenly washing your extensions is? i cum a little just thinking about the concept. but i can't, because i had to be a stupid fuck who got herself sick. washing all of my hair is not only a 2-3 hour long process, but wet hair like that makes illnesses worse for me. yeouch.

i'm sick of things, too. myself, mostly. i'm sick of feeling rotten and not good enough for anyone, anything, any man. my grades are still okay despite me being so bleh i can hardly focus on anything. it'll be a miracle if this post even makes sense. anyway, point is, no amount of male attention could fill the hatred i have for myself in my heart. i'm sick of that. if you know how to fix this carnal need i have to please everyone and give away all i am for someone else, hit me up. tell me what to do.

yesterday after my run (that definitely made my illness worse), i went to get chipotle, as i do. i'm addicted, seriously. as i was walking to the building, a guy driving past me in the parking lot and shouted "BALLS!" at me after rolling his window down. i shit myself laughing. much better than some male attention i've gotten, as you well know if you've read my other posts on this pretentious little blog.

i go back to ohio 8 days from now. if i still feel like garbage even then, i'm rioting, and then donating my organs to science. shit. my lips are chapped because drinking water, as i said, it really fucking hurts. it's 105 ish degrees here every day now, and i can't keep myself hydrated. i don't genuinely pray to god much anymore but i have been all day, reciting mantras to heal my body, mind, and soul.

i'm gonna get my period any day now too. just icing on top of the cake. here's how i know: the other day, before my sickness worsened, i went to hang with vincent (ex roommate) at his new place. i brought fuji so she and lupita could play; i also brought cane's for us to enjoy. jesus. cane's and chipotle in one post, no wonder i'm huge.

so, i went to hang with the fella. he put on dawn of the planet of the apes. i'd never seen any of those movies and there's a new one in theaters right now, so i figured, why the hell not? it'll be a silly time. the movie was shockingly serious. i was invested. (spoilers) when caesar got shot, i yelled, "no!"

"i know, very sad," vincent said while stuffing his face with crinkle cut fries.

i felt my eyes welling with tears. "he was a good leader, how could koba do that?"

"whoa, dude, are you good?"

"he's just... such a good dad... but he was shot! it isn't fair! he just wanted peace with the humans!"

vincent patted my shoulder, confused. "there, there."

i swatted him away, tears falling. i wiped them with a greasy hand. "don't make fun of me! it's so sad. oh god. i need napkins."

my hormones love to go batshit crazy the few days leading up to my period, rattling around my endocrine system like ping pong balls. today i was crying because i just hate being sick so much. go figure. i need to stock up on sanitary napkins (hardy har) and get my heated pad ready.

when i was on birth control, my PMS was manageable. i'd never get upset, never cried over stupid shit like dawn of the planet of the apes. now look at me. 2022 me would be horrified. in the end, though, i prefer this to the nasty side effects of tri-sprintec.

why am i rambling about my hormones and my period? sorry. i'm truly sorry. i just find it amusing in a certain light. i've been listening to "somebody else" by the 1975 a hell of a lot, and it's got me all nostalgic and weepy. really reiterates the fact that i'm a tiny bit unlovable, but hey, fuck that. get money.

i try not to dwell on "situationships" too much, but i can't help it. hot, late summer nights are the perfect time to wallow in your own self pity. i'd smoke a cigarette but i don't wanna make my throat worse. i say that, but cigarettes cause throat cancer. my priorities are truly in order, my friend.

i'm gonna try to go to bed and sleep this shit off. it feels like strep or a sinus infection. don't worry, i'm gonna see a doctor tomorrow, even though i'm cheap and hate paying people to tell me what's wrong with me. ironically enough, this is also why i can't keep a therapist, minus the one i had in high school for my eating disorder. i saw her a bunch last summer, which was cool, except i was seeing her for **** trauma and PTSD so bad i'd have panic attacks every day. good times. i've come a long way in a year. i can't really trust any other therapist except her. why, oh why, must she only do in person sessions in ohio?!

okay, i don't know how to end this one. i'll just share a poem i like, hehehehe. i'm biased toward it, because i'm a redhead, but hopefully you like it too.

"Ash, ash—

You poke and stir.

Flesh, bone, there is nothing there——

A cake of soap,

A wedding ring,

A gold filling.

Herr God, Herr Lucifer

Beware

Beware.

Out of the ash

I rise with my red hair

And I eat men like air."

-Lady Lazarus, by Sylvia Plath

#day1431

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windvexer · 2 years

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Advice for people who want to ask for witchy advice

I've had so much trouble in the past being able to give people good advice or recommendations when they hit me up with, "hey, I'm at [experience level] and looking to expand, any ideas?"

So if you're one of those people really frustrated by vague answers from blogs who seem like they should know what's up, this post might be able to help you out :)

Experience level labels are beyond useless. I know an energy worker practicing over 5 years who firmly identifies as a beginner and instructed me to stay in my lane when I advised they were probably beyond that. I have seen 17yos post stuff like, "Hi! I'm an adept who has been studying Wicca for 3 months and I am ready to begin looking for students."

Instead of telling a blogger, "I'm a beginner/intermediate" (etc. etc.,) try giving context to your practice by explaining what you can do or what you have studied. "I have been studying elemental energy work. I can make energy balls and multi-layered shields."

Months/years of practice is not helpful. Someone seriously studying and practicing magic every day for 6 months can be more skilled than someone casually studying magic and casting occasional spells for 2 years. Same as above - the length of your practice isn't useful in terms of knowing where to point you. Instead, try framing your practice as "I study every day, I want to know some really dense texts I can dig my claws into," or, "I prefer reading over active practice, I'm looking for easy ways to incorporate daily magic." Etc.

Ask specific questions related to specific things you want. "I feel stuck," "I don't know what to look at next," aren't helpful descriptors, especially if you provide 0 context to your path. Try describing what you want. Do you want to learn new ways to cast spells? Do you want to be exposed to new paradigms of practice? Even if you can only point to things like, "I want to feel I have more control in my day-to-day life," or, "I want to feel more spiritual," that is so much better than, "where do I go from here?" which is inevitably responded to with, "wherever you want, its your own path!"

Don't forget, "witchcraft" can mean anything from pure, secular energy work to intensely religious ceremonial craft, folk magic, pop-culture magic, and everything inbetween. Please do not assume that the blogger understands your path/interests/needs based only on the extremely vague label of "witchcraft."

Include what you're not interested in. There is nothing that makes me die inside more than someone sending a vague "what do I do next?" message, and I'm like, "why not try out servitors?" and they follow up with, "I'm actually not interested in servitors... I had a bad experience... thanks anyway." If you are not interested in working with spirits, you don't want to do pure energy work, you have a serious issue with astral travel, etc., say so - especially if you aren't really sure what you do want.

No one is really going to be able to help you if you aren't able to even identify your own wants and needs. I know this is kinda harsh, but no blogger out here is going to be able to do introspection on your behalf. If you genuinely don't know what you want out of magic, if you don't know your spiritual needs, that's okay. If you're just out here like, "I have no idea what I'm into, what would you recommend for people who want to do what you do," that's great. But if you approach bloggers like they hold some kind of mystical key that will unlock your path for you, you'll be disappointed. They don't have that key. They can just give you ideas for what they think you'll be into, based on the context you're willing to provide.

#witchblr #witches of tumblr #witch community #beginner witch #witch tips #witchcraft 101 #just starting

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lihikainanea · 3 years

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Did tiger and bill ever go through like a phase where tiger kind of had to get used to bill thinking of her? Like she wasn't really used to being someone's first choice, like someone thinking about what she might like or want. To have someone frankly just think of you. I'm sorry to be a bother. Just feeling kind of bad lately, and could use some sweet bill. Sorry again.

First of all boo, please don't ever be sorry for sliding into my DMs. I love hearing from you guys, especially if you're not doing that well. I'm all ears, and this blog is a safe space for everyone--so pull up a chair and stay awhile. I, and our two favourite idiots, would be nothing if it weren't for all the amazing asks that you guys send to me <3

Secondly, I love this train of thought because I think it is very, very true. And it probably started back at the beginning of their friendship, right? Yes, it did. Follow me down this rabbit hole.

Bill doesn't make a lot of new friends because since the whole fame thing, he has trouble trusting people--and Bill, by nature, is a caretaker. He's extremely nurturing. He provides. He takes care of those close to him, in one way or another. But he knows his own empathic side, he knows its limits and boundaries, and one of the worst things he can do for his own well being is care about too many people. Get involved with too many people. Bill is happiest amongst his close group of friends, people he knows he can trust, people he can cook dinner for and host movie nights for and fly halfway around the world when he has a premiere.

And tiger, for her part--my girl tiger, she has zero self-preservation skills. Like, none. And Bill is fascinated by that. He's fascinated by this little fireball who not only has no idea who he is, but who subsequently really couldn't give a shit once she found out. He's enamoured with this little scrappy ball of ire who is convinced not only that she can start a bar fight with everyone in the pub, but that she can legitimately win. Bill's never seen anything like it. And once you meet tiger, she's impossible not to love. Or at least, it's impossible not to be intrigued by her, and to want to know more.

But the thing is, that firecracker personality and the massive chip on her shoulder doesn't come from nowhere--tiger's been hurt a lot. And it's because she never goes for the good guys. For as much as Bill has an empath side, tiger has the self-destructive kind where she wants to fix people. And she always goes for the dudes who will take and take and take, the dudes who play rope a dope with her heart, and who leave her shattered. Tiger gives her soul away too easily, and she takes it as a challenge when she's tossed to the side by some guy who was never worth her time anyway. She tries to prove she's worthy.

But then in comes Bill--this big, wall-eyed, kind of freaky looking dude who seems nice and kind and is moderately soft spoken. And when they hang out, Bill starts showing a genuine interest--platonically, of course--but it's genuine. He asks what she does for a living. He asks if she likes it. He wants to know where she went to school, what she studied. Does she have any siblings? Because he has a lot, and he knows how tough big families can make you. When tiger can't decide if she wants the chilli fries or the chicken wings one night at a pub, Bill tells her to get both--and that's when she knew they'd be friends.

And it slowly but surely escalated from there--still all platonic at the beginning--but suddenly, Bill was asking her how she was getting home, if she needed a ride. He was asking her how her week was, when everyone got together on Friday--and if she had mentioned something big previously, a meeting or a presentation or something--he'd remember, and ask her how it went. If he left the bar early, he'd politely ask her if she could text him when she got home.

"Why?" she scoffed.

"Because somebody needs to look out for you," he answered honestly. Tiger, in true fashion, balked awkwardly.

And this is where her defence mechanism started to fly up. Because when you're not used to being cared for, when you're not used to genuinely mattering to someone or hell even just getting the attention of a truly good person--it's weird. It's awkward. It's scary as hell and requires a level of vulnerability that tiger isn't ready to let exist--because it would mean that she would have to admit to herself that she is worthy. That this is the norm, and that she deserves this. That she knowingly let herself settle for being treated like shit for so many years.

And tiger's first defence is always anger. So maybe she started getting real snippy with him, probably well into their friendship by this point--so Bill was cooking for her, and if he wasn’t then he was checking in to make sure she ate at least one vegetable that day. If she had a date, he would wait until she texted him that she was in for the night--whether that was at the guy’s place or hers. If she needed a ride home in the morning then he would pick her up, in all of her walk of shame glory--but he’d pick her up with a few Advil, some big sunglasses, a huge coffee. And he would absolutely make fun of her nefarious, ill-fated decisions but he’d always wait at least 12 hours before he dared.

But to go even further--you are absolutely right. Bill does put her first. Once she is solidified as his best friend, then there’s no going back--she comes first. And part of it is Bill really is legitimately concerned because tiger has no self preservation skills and he worries that if HE doesn’t concern himself over her, then tiger will just like...her reckless decisions will be her undoing. He must look after Little Human, because Little Human’s self-destructive streak is far too prevalent. He has left dates in the dust when she needed his help. He looks out for her in group settings, and intervenes if some idiot is getting too handsy with her. If he has a boys night that night but tiger calls crying because some idiot broke her heart, or crying because it’s shark week and she’s out of gummy bears--then Bill is there. In a heartbeat, he’s there. She comes first.

And I’ll bet it’s all very nice, but it also kind of has tiger seething. Because she’s not used to this kind of...care. The genuineness of it. And tiger can’t be vulnerable enough to admit that part of her likes it, part of her feels safe knowing that even in the wee hours of the morning, Bill is awake and waiting for her to let him know she got in safely. Part of her kind of likes this idea that someone is thinking of her, that someone prioritizes her. But it’s still tiger, so she also gets hella mad. And she seethes--for a long time, she seethes. Quietly. And then maybe it all just comes to a head one night when she goes over to Bill’s place after work and he has a crisp glass of white wine waiting for her, a change of clothes, even her favourite make up remover--the kind that doesn’t sting, because she has sensitive skin. And all of that pisses her off, but then she walks into the kitchen as he’s deftly cleaning and slicing mushrooms.

“How did it go?” he asks casually. Tiger plays dumb.

“How did what go?” she swigs her wine.

“The meeting with your boss today.”

“...Fine,” she mumbles, petulantly. Of course he’d remember that, even though she told him two weeks ago.

“We don’t have to talk about it if you don’t want to,” he offers kindly. Tiger sees an errant pile of green onions on his chopping board, and she eyes them wearily but somewhat triumphantly. Bill heads to the fridge, pulls out a bowl of salad, then he tosses the green onions in. Perfect, she thinks, and it gives her a weird sense of satisfaction. Mr. Nice Guy, Mr. Considerate, doesn’t even remember what she considers to be the most significant thing about her. That she hates green onions. She feels triumphant, renewed. Somewhat weirdly comforted to confirm that perhaps she doesn’t mean that much to him.

Until he heads back to the fridge, and pulls out another bowl of salad--one that he promptly dresses, salts and peppers, and tosses. One without green onions. One for her.

“Why do you do that?!” she explodes. Bill jumps in surprise.

“Do what?” he asks innocently, “This one has no green onions!”

“Exactly,” she continues, “Ugh, Bill. Just...why do you always...ugh, Bill!”

Bill is stunned, still holding his bowl of salad, trying to figure out what exactly is happening here.

“It’s too much,” tiger says, slamming her wine down, “All of it is too much.”

“What’s too much?”

“You! This. Why do you always just....think of everything?” she says, and she’s steadfastly working herself into a tizzy.

“Tiger...”

“How? How do you remember these things? How do you fucking remember that I had a meeting with my boss today, a meeting that I told you about two weeks ago? Why do you make a whole other bowl of salad for me, why do you remember that I hate green onions?”

“Because I care about you kid,” he shrugs.

Tiger is angry, but she’s also at a loss for words. Bill’s genuineness, his honesty, will do that. For as much as she struggles to be vulnerable. Bill shows that side of himself openly. She doesn’t even know why she’s so angry. Bill watches her for a minute, but she’s kind of just bug-eyed so he goes back to his cutting board and starts calmly chopping his little mushrooms again.

“I don’t like it,” she mutters after a long pause.

“Too bad,” he shrugs non-chalantly. Tiger glares at him.

“Too bad?” she seethes.

“Too bad,” he repeats.

“Stop it,” she says.

“No.”

“Bill, I mean it. Stop always trying to--”

“No.”

“I’m not finished,” she stamps her foot, “Stop being such--”

“No.” he says again, “Tiger, this is what I do.This is how I am. I care about the people that matter to me.”

“Well I don’t ma--”

“Yes you do. You matter to me. So I suggest you put on your big girl panties, and fucking deal with it,” he says. And that’s final. Tiger is taken aback at his tone, at the way his face suddenly got serious--but then in a heartbeat, it’s relaxed again.

“Now, do you want mustard on your burger, or ketchup?” he asks. Tiger is petulantly silent, glaring at him.

“Tiger.” he warns, holding up the hamburger bun.

“Shouldn’t you already know?” she huffs in annoyance, going to the fridge and grabbing the wine. She swigs it right from the bottle as she boosts herself up on the kitchen counter. Bill goes to the fridge and grabs the mayo--her favourite--putting a thick schmear on the bun.

“God, get fucked asshole,” she mutters. Bill just grabs her face, plants a noisy kiss on her cheek as she shrieks and swats him.

#bill skarsgard #bill skarsgard drabble #BFF!Bill #bill skarsgard fanfic #bill skarsgard fanfiction #bill skarsgard fic

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whosaskingwrites · 4 years

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Unrequited (Atsumu x Reader)

A/N: The first one of the series. I'm actually pretty proud of this one for it being the first one on the blog. It went under heavy editing and I think I cut out a whole two pages of pointless dialog. And it still ended up longer than intended. Anyways enjoy!

WARNINGS: Angst. Just angst that's it. And blood mentioned nothing too explicit. One sided love

DATE: Thursday October 22nd, 2020

Details: 4.8 pages 1,792 words

Theme: Hanahaki Disease- The victim begins to have flowers grow in their lungs leading to them coughing up flowers petals this continues getting worse until it causes their death. There's a surgery option to get rid of the flowers but it comes at the price of never feeling love again.

Angst masterlist

I stared at the ceiling of my room debating on if I was healthy enough for school. As I sat up my eyes drifted to the yellow petals overflowing from the trash can in the corner.

"Sunflowers," I mumbled as I looked at the petals.

They were supposed to represent happiness but as I looked at the blood flecked petals all I felt was overwhelming sadness. Summer break ended today so maybe I could get away with an I forgot.

"Yeah that sounds good," I said as I got out of bed and stretched.

I felt a cough bubble in my throat as I rushed to the bathroom I placed my hand over my mouth coughing into it. Blood seeped between my fingers as I felt the soft touch of flower petals in my palm. I sighed as the coughing subsided I put the petals on the sink counter. I cleaned the blood on my hands and face before heading back to my room. My limbs already felt weak as I walked it was a struggle to make the ten steps to my room.

"No school today," I sighed out as I laid down on my mattress. I let my eyes slowly slide closed as I fell asleep.

"Y/n," In my sleepy haze I could hear someone saying my name.

"Hey y/n wake up," I slowly opened my eyes and looked to the side. My eyes caught sight of grey hair and eyes looking at me in concern.

"Samu? What are you doin here?" My voice was thick with sleep and my speech was slightly slurred.

"What am I doing here? You haven't answered anyone's calls or texts! I was worried so I left practice to check on you," I furrowed my eyebrows at him. "You left practice? Kita's gonna be mad at you," I sat up which caused Osamu to put a hand infront of me and push me back down.

"He's the one who let me go. If anything Tsumu was mad he also didn't get to come," I coughed at that which Osamu sighed at. "Are you sick?" He asked with a raised eyebrow.

"No I'm fi-" "Don't lie to me," I snapped my head towards him and he was staring back at me.

"I-I'm not lying," he shook his head and lifted his palm. Staring back at me was a single yellow petal dotted with red "Yes, you are," I flinched as I realized he'd figured it out.

"How long?" Osamu was quieter now as he spoke. "A year but it didn't get bad until the beginning of summer break," I whispered back as he placed the petal down on the ground.

"Who is it?" I felt everything I'd kept bottled up break down and tears fill my eyes "You already know," my voice cracked as Osamu sighed and pulled me towards him.

He wrapped both arms around me and pushed my face into the crook of his neck. "I know," he mumbled it as confirmation to my previous statement.

I started coughing again pulling back I covered my mouth with my hand. Osamu's eyes widened when he noticed more blood on the petals as they slipped through my fingers. I started heaving as more petals came up. Osamu left the room coming back with a cup of water and a rag. I put my hands down and watched the petals cover my bedsheets there was a thin red layer covering the petals making them look a reddish orange. I didn't need to look in a mirror to know there was a trail of blood leaking down the side of my mouth.

"Jesus...," Osamu spoke as he looked at me. He took the rag and cleaned my face and hands before giving me the glass of water.

"You let it get this bad?" I could see the concern laced in his grey eyes eyebrows furrowed downwards and mouth pulled down in a frown.

"I didn't realize it was this bad," my throat was scratchy as I spoke taking huge glups of water to sooth the ache the petals left behind.

"What are you going to do?" He asked "The same thing I've been doing. Try to forget about it," He blinked at my response "Is that why you've been ignoring Tsumu?" I nodded slowly. "It hasn't worked though,"

Before we could continue Osamu's phone rang. He answered it slowly "yeah?"

"Don't yeah me Samu! You've been gone for an hour! Get back here!" I could hear Atsumu's yelling through the phone. I got up and heading to the hallway with the glass tucked into my hand.

Suddenly the petals came back in my throat and I started coughing. The glass slipped from my fingers as I collapsed to the ground. It shattered next to me and a few shards cut my hands as I placed them on the floor. The petals came out red instead of the normal bright yellow causing small pools of blood to form around them.

I couldn't breath as I heard my bedroom door get thrown open Osamu stood there wide eyed with terror lacing his features. "Y/n! Hey stay with me!" He dropped to my level ignoring the glass that dug into his uniform pants and probably cut his legs. I saw the fear in his eyes deepen when he saw the amount of blood on the ground.

"Y/n!? What's happening! What's going on with y/n!?" I could still hear Atsumu's yelling despite my coughing. Osamu rapidly hung up and dialed someone else.

"Hello? My friend started coughing up blood and petals and I'm think she's dying please send help!" I could hear the panic in his voice as my eyes started to close. I finally stopped coughing and took deep wheezing breaths. Black spots covered my vision as a wave of exhaustion hit my body.

Osamu took my hand "Hey y/n no. Stay awake," I slowly shook my head in response. "Can't. I'm tired Samu," I mumbled at him. "You have to," Was the last thing he said before darkness over took my vision.

"Remove them!" "Sir, she has to make that decision not you," I let out a light groan as I slowly opened my eyes. Atsumu stood next to my bedside clearly yelling at a doctor.

He looked at me giving the doctor a chance to slip out of the room. "Osamu told me. Who is it?" I flinched at the anger in his voice.

A sense of relief filled me when I realized Osamu hadn't told him everything. "I- I can't tell you," I whispered. "No! No bullshit! Tell me!" I shook my head at him. "Is it Kita? Or Suna? No its Ojiro isn't it or-" I cut him off before he could continue. "It's you!" I yelled back at him.

"Me?" He asked slowly. I nodded in response "You can't love me," I sighed looking down "But I do," I felt those flowers again in my lungs clawing their way up to my throat.

"Well stop loving me!" I balled my fists together as a flash of anger struck me. "I ALREADY TRIED!" my throat burned in protest of the yelling. "I TRIED AND TRIED AND TRIED!" "AND IT NEVER WORKED!" tears rolled down my face as I looked at him. His eyes narrowed at me "I can't love you. So get them removed," Atsumu left the room after that leaving me sobbing into my hands.

Osamu walked in soon after "y/n," he whispered my name as he got closer to me. The doctor came in and looked at me sadly. "Are you sure about this?" He asked. All I could manage was a weak nod as I looked at the hospital bed.

"Do either of you know someone who's gone through this procedure before?" Before I could answer Osamu had said something. "Yes...My brother," I looked at Osamu in shock but he was looking away from me.

"Right well I'm going to go check the x-rays and come back and we can schedule the surgery then," I nodded at the doctor as he handed me a glass of water before leaving the room again.

"Atsumu...had Hanahaki Disease?" Osamu finally looked back at me slowly nodding. "He never told me who caused it and he got it removed before telling anyone," I sighed as I looked away.

"You know Samu I used to like sunflowers," I whispered staring out the window. "They were never your favorite flower though," He responded back to me. "You remember?" I turned to him as I asked to discover he was already looking at me. "Yep. Buttercups," I laughed as I nudged him with my shoulder "You only remember because it has butter in the name," He chuckled back at me "You caught me," we smiled at eachother as the doctor came back.

The doctor had a sad look in his eyes as he looked at me. "I don't have good news for you," The smile on my face fell as I looked at the doctor. "The disease has progressed too far for us to remove it," I gasped "W-what?" The doctor looked at me as I felt tears slip down my cheeks "I'm sorry but there's no way we could remove them without killing you," I turned and buried my face into Osamu's chest to hide my tears.

The doctor left as Osamu ran his fingers through my hair and down my back. "Samu...," I whispered and he hummed at me "I just wanted to say thank you for being there and I love you," I mumbled as I began drifting off to sleep the last thing I registered was Osamu responding to me. "...Love you too y/n,"

*third person p.o.v*

"You know Samu this is my fault," Osamu's eyes glanced to his twin who was sadly looking down.

"If I hadn't been a coward and told her...She would still be here and I could still love," He watched Atsumu set a bouquet of buttercups against the cool marble infront of him.

"Her favorite...Maybe that'll comfort her," Atsumu walked away while Osamu looked back at the grave.

Y/n l/n DOB: (b/d) 'She loved until the end'

Osamu felt a cough in his throat as a small yellow flower landed in his palm. It was covered in blood as he stared at it. It matched the ones in the bouquet and a sad laugh left Osamu throat.

"Buttercups huh...," He let the flower leave his palm with the wind as he followed his brother a small sad smile on his face as he whispered one last thing to the wind.

"I love you y/n,"

————————————————————————

TAG LIST: @wonhomarshmallow

#atsumu miya #atsumu x reader #atsumu angst #WhosaskingAngst #haikyu x reader #haikyuu!!#haikyuu x reader #haikyu #osamu miya #osamu angst

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cheryls-blossomed · 3 years

Note

Just to let you know this won't be the last irisco scenes this season carlos is coming back for the 150th episode and the finale. So that's probably when you'll get your proper goodbye from iris and cisco and I can't wait to see his reaction when he sees nora again and also meeting bart .... those are the type of things I'm looking forward to. I actually enjoyed this episode just as a fan and not someone to pick apart everything but just watch it as a viewer and see how happy carlos was filming this made me enjoy it even more. Could it have been way better absolutely but I already went into this episode with the intent of it being a otf type of episode and who wrote the episode so my mind already knew what this would mostly turn out to be. Now this episode is out the way I'm really ready for the ball to start rolling with these stories and storylines. Was it perfect absolutely not was it my favorite nope but I can say I enjoyed it. To those fans that I see that think Iris is being pushed out the show to me I call BS also from what carlos has mentioned in his interviews he sees that eric is very accommodating to his actors and makes sure they are good not just about their character but them as a person he tries to help them and work with them the best he can and to me that's a good showrunner. Eric has a long way to go when it comes to fixing stuff in the writers room but I will say he's made that set a better place to feel comfortable and work at. Also CP was talking about her experiences with that network which I think eric has tried to do what he can and what he's allowed to do for his actors wellbeing. As for Westallen as we seen in 7x11 when GG and CP are given great material they can really work with it and even when they don't they do their best. Now the Joe and Iris scene I couldn't tell you why it was cut ... timing .... or did they feel it wasn't needed if iris was literally having that same type of convo with kamilia so they choose that one we may never really know so I tend to not worry about those things but I get why some fans would be mad about that especially how it seems to always happen to iris getting her scenes cut but it is what it is I'm not going to keep harping over spoiled milk. I enjoy your blog so much cause it gives us fans a safe space no matter if we agree or not so thank you for that. Here's to hoping the season turns out better for you and the fans that aren't enjoying it right now. I'm more of positive optimistic type of person so I tend to see the positive side of things especially for my mental health. Anyways I don't want to take up to much of your time sorry for this long ass post I'll try to keep it short next time!

No need to apologize, nonnie! I appreciate you sharing all your thoughts. I'm glad that you enjoy this blog, and I'm also glad that we can healthily disagree at times, because I think that's important. And optimism is honestly a very good thing in this life.

I definitely don't think Iris/Candice is being pushed out of the show. There's nothing to suggest that from this season, and I’m not sure why anyone would think this.

Oh yeah, I mean, I don't really have much hope for meaningful Iris/Cisco scenes, but a small goodbye in the finale would be nice. And I'm glad that Cisco will get to meet Bart and Nora.

Re the Iris/Joe scene: I think it's pretty clear with the benefit of hindsight that that moment was one showcasing Iris's POV about why she was struggling to hire a new photojournalist and that Joe was helping her work through her feelings about Kamilla leaving. It was hopefully a moment of vulnerability, and it wasn't going to be the same moment as the Iris/Kamilla scene, because it was supposed to be Iris working through what she was originally struggling with in the KamIris scene. I would have felt better if Iris and Kamilla got another scene for the sake of closure, where we got to see them have this really supportive, sweet moment, but they did not get that. Part of it is that the show really didn't care about Kamilla at all in the episode and didn't give her any proper sendoff. Additionally, there's the continued fact that Iris scenes are used for promo, but her scenes seem to be the first to end up on the cutting room floor, especially important character-building moments for her, often times shared with her family (her father, her husband, and her daughter). They very well could have cut something else to include the Iris/Joe scene, but they deliberately chose to cut this scene.

Anyways, with regards to Eric, I don't really agree with his stylistic choices as showrunner, and I am somewhat frustrated as a fan by his... apparent lying about story-lines, therefore indicating that he knows what the people want, but he chooses not to focus on what the people want, but it's clear he's a good boss when it comes to the cast and that he's made the set safer and is the first showrunner who has really listened to Candice and addressed her concerns. I think to a degree we have to separate who Eric is as a boss and our own concerns and grievances with regards to story-telling as fans (which are certainly very valid and reflect upon him as showrunner, but are separate from what he’s done to make the work place environment better).

#anonymous #replies

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gh0stchoir · 3 years

Note

YOYOOYOOOOO SAME NAME GANG!!! Was wondering if you do matchups for bnha, if soooo

Im ftm using they/he pronouns, im into girls and nonbinary people(maybe guys??) and im ace!!!

My star sign is a Sagittarius and my MBTI type is INTP. Personality wise im an anxious ball of nerves and stress, but when im just listening to music or in a car im just sedated, like im just gone. I try to act cool because im covering up the need to have the ground swallow me whole so I dont have to talk to people.

I'm 5'7 and a bit chubby but also stronk, my hair is just a giant brown dandelion, like i can never get it to stick down. I wear rectangle glasses or contacts when im not lazy, and I have a few scars on my face from being a dumbass as well as a shit ton of freckles from all my sunburns(I like to swim), and Im usually wearing a Zelda, Junji Ito, Record shop from home town, or band hoodie with some paint splattered jeans(I do tech crew for plays)

My friends call me the mom friend, and I always bring extra water, gum or tissues. Whatever my friends might need when we are hanging out!!I love marine biology and want to be a marine biologist!!! I play the piano(very shittyly) and the drums(not as shitty)

My favourite books are the Lord of the Rings, my favourite tv show is TWD, my favourite movie is Breakfast Club, my favourite musical is Falsettos, and my favourite game is just any Zelda game. I also play Roller derby and Rugby because im cool like that >:)

Anyways your blog rockkksss,, have a good daaaaay

A/n: I’ve never done a matchup before, but holy hell this was fun!! I hope I did this right!

DEFINITELY MINA I’D SAY!!

She’s a bit rambunctious, so you’d definitely help with making sure she has water or bandaids if she’s doing something extra. She also absolutely loves animals(in my opinion) and is probably really fascinated with the ocean n stuff so tell her some facts and she’s listening for hours!

She’ll probably jam out with you, having the time of y’all’s lives playin music! She’ll definitely be your hype woman for anything whether it for sports, if you’re feeling dysphoric, and if you can’t beat a game! (Dw about her ever beating you in a game, other than Mario kart. She’s scarily good at it.)

She def will ask how the hell you play roller derby n rugby bc holy shit she’s in love with you and is so curious about sports. She’s extremely clumsy so if you teach her, be ready to watch her trip on her own feet and laugh at herself.

Y’all plan designated movie nights every week. I genuinely think she also really likes Breakfast Club, so you two will definitely watch it a lot if y’all are up for it.

Mina will wrap herself around you when you’re visibly anxious or stressed near her. She’ll take you to her dorm room and cuddle you and compliment you for hours. This girl is w h i p p e d for ya! If anyone in her class says one word abt you in any negative way, purposely or not, she’s like a guard dog.

Mina is a fashionista, what can I say. So she will definitely go and buy you lots and lots of Zelda shirts or any band you like! She buys you shirts and hoodies often, always liking you to have a full closet full of clothes.

OH OH OH OH AND FOR PRIDE FESTIVALS!!?? SHES ALL DRESSED UP WITH U AND HAPPILY SHOWING THE WORLD HER BEAUTIFUL PARTNER!! She’s a simp, what can I say🤷

#bnha matchup #mha matchup #mha matchups #bnha matchups

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intruality-overlord · 4 years

Text

Why Are We (Best) Friends?

Warnings: excessive swearing, alcoholism, mentions of drugs, drug use, suggestive humor, implied sexual content (no smut), some gore descriptions. Generally, Remus stuff.

Taglist: @blogging-time @veraisnotfine @littlestr @jessibbb @broken-pens @hi-its-tutty @idkanameatall @moxiety--sanders101 @theyluna-womoon

Let me know if you want to be added or removed from the taglist! Updates every Wednesday/Thursday. Get ready for fighting...

Chapter Five: Fuck You

The Present.

“How much do you remember?” Remus nagged the next morning as Patton bustled around his room getting dressed.

“I wasn’t black out drunk!” Patton retaliated, “I remember everything.” Patton wasn’t, and he’ll say it again, not a lightweight. No. Not that the thought offended him in any way shape or form. “I mean, it’s fuzzy, but still,” he mumbled into his shirt as he pulled it off over his head.

“So… Logan knows and now probably the others…” Remus clutched the rumpled bed sheets, his eyes stretched wide to accommodate all his stress. Waiting for the floorboards to open their jaws and swallow him, chew and spit him out again, he stared at it expectantly. He’d rather bleed to death from splintery teeth than deal with this right now, and he wouldn’t have to if he resembled mashed potatoes. This fucking stress. This guilt.

“I’m over thirty years old! It’s normal, having a drink with a friend!” Patton dismissed with a wave of his hand, swatting Remus’s very real, very valid concerns away. Not entirely unusual. That is, if they were talking about something as trivial as why Mother Nature created hyenas the way she did. Poor things, childbirth was already messy enough.

“They shouldn’t be so shocked. Now where’s my—” Patton whisked around the room looking for a change of clothes, and Jesus, he needed to clean his room. He found his one clean polo wedged behind his wardrobe. Remus thought he was entirely too concerned about clothes when everything had been fundamentally fucked up yesterday. Clothes were overrated, anyway.

“Why did you…?” Remus couldn’t help but ask. Trying to make sense of things was a new hobby of his. He was still an amateur. Patton pulled his fresh polo on, and Remus tried to ask again hoping he’d succeed with one less distraction.

“Why did you admit we’re friends to Logan?”

Patton just looked at him like he was crazy. Crazier than he thought. “Because we are? I had just been talking about how I need to stop pretending we're not friends. Do you really think I’d go back on my word so quickly?” He said incredulously. “Hey, I think I left my hoodie under the bed again. Could you pass it?”

Remus did retrieve the garment from beneath the bed, checking there were no cobwebs or spiders on it. Then he held it, frozen. Remus rivalled Virgil when it came to thinking of worst case scenarios, only Remus wasn’t normally scared by them. Now… Remus knew he’d someday ruin everything for Patton. Ruin it like he ruins everything. That’s what happens when you’re the embodiment of bad ideas. It’s not fun anymore when he’s ruining something, someone, he actually cares about.

He just wanted Patton to be happy…

Hands rested on his shoulders, comforting and solid. “Look at me,” Patton hushed. Remus did.

Since when did his eyes twinkle like that?

“I don’t regret it, Remus,” Patton said sternly. “I can’t afford to spend every sober moment regretting everything.” Patton smiled. “I want good memories, however few.” His eyes crinkled in that simple, rare way you’d hope to see well worn into his skin one day. That private smile was for Remus.

Patton gently took the hoodie and wrapped it around his shoulders like a cape. “I’m gonna need some tequila for this.”

Oh god.

(}ï{)

Now how was Patton supposed to break the news? He chickened out at breakfast, and he chickened out at lunch, now it was dinner. There was chicken on the table and no room for more than one. God, it felt like coming out of the closet all over again. Think, what would Remus do?

“I’m not a virgin,” Patton blurted.

Oh yes, very subtle.

Cutlery clattered and clanged combined with collective choked coughing.

That didn’t quite come across how he had wanted it to. Perhaps Patton was drunker than he thought and he didn’t need that extra liquid courage right before dinner after all. He had been aiming for tipsy, like usual, when he had taken a few shots this morning.

(He didn’t know how to get through a whole day entirely sober anymore. Wake up, get dressed, have a couple shots, brush your teeth, have breakfast— it was routine. When sober, he hardly had the energy to maintain his act, but when tipsy, he was just delirious enough for his insanity to come across as jovial joy.

Yes, that did mean Patton was living with a constant hangover.

And no, he could not find the strength to care.)

Perhaps he had overshot it with his nerves making him lose count.

All well, it served the same purpose.

Last time, anyway, Patton had just blurted that he thought guys were attractive, and it turned out fine. (Which went something along the lines of:

“Boys are hot.”

“Duh.”

“They are indeed glorious creatures.”

“I can confirm that that is a factual statement.”)

Why should it work any different this time?

Wait, why is no one saying anything?

Patton looked around at his fellow sides, and they all looked like they saw a creepy crawly death dealer sitting comfortably on his head.

“Did you hear me?”

As their brains caught up, Virgil and Roman both spluttered, “What?!” There was another brief silence before the information caught up to Logan, and he too followed with a small, “What?”

Bewildered, Virgil and Roman’s heads snapped around at Logan. “You mean— you didn’t…?”

“No,” Logan said, eyebrows furrowed. “I thought I dreamt what I saw yesterday,” Logan eventually said. All of the colour was drained from him. “Yeah, I know, so surprising how articulate I can be when I’m drunk,” Patton half joked defensively.

“Do you know what virgin even means, Patton?” Roman asked slowly, hoping this was one of Patton’s hilarious misunderstandings. Patton sighed. “It means someone who hasn’t had sex before. And I have. So I’m not,” he said, beginning to curl in on himself. He felt trapped like an insect enveloped in a water droplet, not strong enough to break the surface tension.

“With you always expecting me to be honest I wouldn’t have thought you’d be so surprised when I actually am,” Patton observed bitterly. Something about the mention of truthfulness struck a nerve in Virgil, resulting in a false epiphany. “Deceit?” Virgil said sceptically. The glare pressing on Patton made him feel like he nearly lost his footing despite not moving an inch.

“Wha— no, I'm not Janus!” Patton said incredulously. “Not that being Janus is a bad thing,” he added under his breath. Patton wouldn’t be offended to be compared to Janus under normal circumstances. However in this situation, he was put off by the negative connotations Virgil was associating with Janus.

“That sounds like something Deceit would say,” Roman mused.

“Oh, you want proof? Fine! Janus!” Patton summoned. A very discombobulated Janus appeared, much to the others’ surprise. “I know exactly what’s going on,” he lied.

“You are Janus, I am Patton, correct?” Patton snapped. “...No?” Janus said, utterly confused. Slightly scared too.

“See?” Patton pleaded. Meanwhile, Janus glanced around at everyone else’s faces screwed up in confusion and some other indecipherable glob of emotions Janus deemed safe to assume as anger. “Jesus, good luck,” he muttered to Patton, and he promptly sank out.

“We just never thought— you always were so pure—”

“Because that’s what was expected from me!” Patton heaved a breath, pushing back his tears. “I committed adultery! There! I said it— and no, I don’t mean adulthood,” he announced. Those words felt like screaming in a claustrophobic space. Stretching, stuffed into a suitcase, and feeling the unforgiving, unrelenting walls. It felt like breathing in the vacuum of space.

“I knew as soon as I broke that perfect, innocent image of me you have, you wouldn’t react well. And guess what? You’re acting exactly like I expected you to!” He screamed. With another sharp, trembly breath, he vented all his frustrations out to people other than Remus for the first time.

He lost it.

“You’ve always treated me like a fucking child even though I’m the oldest. Telling me to shut up and let the adults talk, and this is a grown up conversation, or oh, you wouldn’t get it Patton even. Always sheltering, patronising me as if I’m not over thirty fucking years old,” a lump formed in his throat. “I’m Thomas’s heart. Where do you think his feelings of lust come from?!” Miserable strings of choked back words wound up like a ball of yarn into an incomprehensible howl that tumbled out of Patton.

“When I learnt what repression means, it sounded like something that perhaps wasn’t the best thing for me to keep doing, an-and I thought you’d want me to stop. That you’d be happy for me if I did,” he whimpered.

“W-we did! We are!” Roman quickly jumped in. “It’s just… just not— you… um, listen Padre, uh we,” he faltered. Looking to Logan for guidance, they just found him lost in his head, eyebrows scrunched, grimacing.

“Hold on, if it wasn’t us then it had to have been a dark side,” Virgil finally realised. Roman gasped, and Logan grimaced harder.

“I’m also an alcoholic?” Patton said in an attempt to quickly distract. It distracted them alright, only their reactions were just as bad or worse. It sent them all into a senseless squabble.

“So there was no consent then?” Virgil spoke up, mildly horrified.

What the fuck did he just hear?

Jaw slacked, breath fumbling, all Patton could hear for a moment was his thudding heart before a feeble, “Of course there was,” escaped him. “I can think for myself I-I-I’m not a child I…” And he looked like he'd just been stabbed, they saw. Between his ribs, the knife twisted, locking the blade in and exuding pressure. Because no, they’re not letting his blood spill. Can’t have carpet stains now, can they?

“He must have been manipulating you. Making you valuable with— with drinking and taking advantage of you,” Virgil said, seeming almost concerned for him. “He’s a dark side, he can’t genuinely care about you. It’s the only explanation,” Roman agreed rather bluntly.

His ears must be broken.

Patton’s eyes glistened. “How could you say that?” The watery wimper scraped his throat. “He’s my friend.” Patton wouldn’t let a tear fall; he refused. Only his true friends were allowed to see him that valuable.

“This— this isn’t— please just listen, please! I just wanted to be more honest with you all, an-and I was hoping yo-you’d accept our friendship…” Patton finished lamely.

“He is a dark side, Patton,” they said. “We are your friends,” they said. “We are the ones who really care about you,” they said. Lying was wrong, they had said. Hypocrites.

Mouth helplessly clamped shut, his thoughts ricketed around his skull like a brick in a washing machine. He wouldn’t have had to resort to alcoholism if they hadn’t made him bottle his feelings. Remus would never hurt him, he’s a good friend! Patton has been by his side when Remus was so fucking high, he didn’t even recognise him, and not for one moment did he even consider hurting him in any way! Remus cares. Maybe this whole thing was one big mistake. Patton always belonged with the others, not Virgil. And if Virgil had already made the switch over, then it was his turn. Patton had thought, hey, maybe I’m wrong. They’re my friends; they love me. But he was wrong. Stupid, nieve Patton being wrong, who knew.

Remus wouldn’t treat him like this.

Reverting to his last resort, Patton pleaded, “How can Thomas love himself if he can’t accept himself? If you can’t accept us?”

Completely unmoved, they held up their hands to address him as a scared, dumb animal. Their voice tweaked into a tone used for gently scorning a toddler, “It’s okay, Patton. It’s not your fault he’s manipulated you. We can help. He doesn’t have to use you anymore, we can do this together—”

“F-fuck you. Fuck. You. Bastards.”

As he sunk down, Patton called back one last thing, “By the way, Roman.

I fucked your brother.”

(}ï{)

Why? Why, why, why, why, why— It’s all Logan could think the whole time. It just didn’t compute, no matter how valiantly he tried to understand. Why why why why why?!

Next Chapter:

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bnhaficsforthesoul · 5 years

Text

Shinsou fluff alphabet

Starting off this blog the right way

A = Attractive (What do they find attractive about the other?)

He really likes your eyes

Hes definitely the type of person that puppy dog eyes work on

When you look up at him with those pretty eyes he just melts into them

B = Baby (Do they want a family? Why/Why not?)

He would want a baby eventually

Like after you get married

But he loves the thought of having a baby with you

Seeing which traits come out from both of you

Or adopting a baby, he thinks that would be awesome too

He loves kids, hes just kinda scared that he doesn't know how to take care of them

C = Cuddle (How do they cuddle?)

He is the c li n g I est mf

He acts like hes not but he is

He doesn't have a preference when it comes to being the little or big sppon

He loves holding you

Just wrapping his arms around your shoulders or waist and hugging you as tight as possible while pressing little kisses onto your forehead

And when you hold him he melts

He feels so loved and wanted

Play with his hair plz plz plz

His eyes will flutter shut and hell just be like

"Mmm... so comfy"

It's so cute

D = Dates (What are dates with them like?)

Toshi is pretty spontaneous

So dates will either be

Let's go out at 3 in the morning and run around the city and buy junk food

"Babe, I got us reservations for this super fancy restaurant so make sure you get dressed up. Were leaving in an hour."

They're always fun tho, even the more formal dates are super silly with you two making jokes and just being crackheads

E = Everything (You are my ____ (e.g. my life, my world…))

To Hitoshi, you are his inspiration

His reason for moving forward in life

Before you, his only goal was to become a hero - and even then no one seemed to believe he could

Then theres you

You who tells him that his quirk does not make him evil

It's super effective against villains

hell be a pro hero someday

Before he wanted to become hero simply because why not

But now he wants to become a hero for you, to show you that your positive words were not misplaced and he is someone you can count on

F = Feelings (When did they know they were in love?)

It was one night after he was training with Aizawa in martial arts (since he knows his quirk isnt the most effective in battle if he cant get it to work)

And he walked out of the field to see you standing there with this big smile on your face

"What are you doing here? It's late, you should go home."

"I was but then I saw you training and wanted to watch 😊"

He kinda gives you a weird look and is like why

"Cause you're super cool Shinsou! If I wanna be a pro hero I need to make sure I can get strong too, so I wanted to take some pointers."

His eyes widen and hes like- you think I'm cool??? Me who has to do this training cause my quirk is useless most the time?? Me who's quirk actually sucks?? You think I'm cool.

You just give him this big smile and you're like well ya anyways see you tomorrow

And he kinda is just like fuckfuckfuckfuckdu kkckcdudyhsj the whole way home cause wow you're super cute and you're the only person to ever praise him like that

He lies awake all night and is like I'm in love fuk

So ya, he was in love long before you even started dating

G = Gentle (Are they gentle? If so, how?)

Hes so gentle with you

Like hell brush your hair out of your face and move it behind your ear

When you kiss his hand kinda just cups your jaw and his thumb rubs your cheek

He presses little kisses on your forehead when you hug

Theres times when he can be more rough, but you're his baby and he cherishes you so much

He doesn't wanna scare you in any way and treats you so well

H = Hands (How do they like to hold hands?)

When you're walking he likes to place his fingers with yours and holds onto your hand tight

But other than that, he prefers holding your hand by placing his on top of yours and lacing his fingers while his thumb rubs your pinky

Hell pick up your hand and press kisses on it

Lowkey to tease you cause he likes to see you blush but still

I = Impression (What was their first impression?)

His first impression of you wasn't the best? It wasn't the worst either tho

He first met you at the sports festival

You were fighting after he did, so when he was walking back and you were going out you saw him

So you were like "great job in the match!!"

And he thought you were teasing him cause he felt he horribly lost so he got kinda pissed

And was like "ya whatever"

He realized you weren't lying later tho, when you kept talking to him whenever you would see him at school

J = Jealousy (Do they get jealous?)

Oooooh yes, boy gets so jealous

You're HIS baby, not anyone elses

Hes put up with a lot of shit and a lot of shitty people and now that he has someone who loves him and he adores back - he doesn't like the fear of losing them

It's less of he gets angry when people flirt with you and more of he gets scared

Hes scared hes not the best and that you might decide you'll leave

He knows you love him and are loyal to him, but he cant shake that fear

K = Kiss (How do they kiss? Who initiated the first kiss?)

So he initiated the first kiss

It was after your first date, and he kinda just kissed you out of nowhere (and you didn't mind at all)

While he does kiss you fairly gently, its lots of times a way to tease you

He loves to kiss you more roughly- the kinds of kisses that leave you breathless and your lips bruised

But he starts gentle half the time so that you get frustrated and have to try and make him kiss you deeper

Lots of tongue

Lots and lots of tongue

L = Love (Who says ‘I love you’ first?)

You did

Again, He knew he loved you before you started dating

But he didn't wanna put you off by saying it too soon so he waited for you

He did things to help you know he loved you, but he waited until you said it

The first time you said it you were cuddling

You were lying on his chest and he was playing with your hair on his bed and you quietly said "I love you Toshi. So much.."

His eyes widened and he got the biggest smile on his face

"I love you too baby"

M = Memory (What’s their favourite memory together?)

His favorite memory with you is probably one of your first dates

He took you to an amusement park

You were holding hands the whole time and you were so happy throughout the whole night

Hearing your beautiful laugh, being able to play the games with you and win you prizes since hes for some reason super good at them, getting to be that annoying couple that just cuddles in all the lines

He was in heaven

of course you had to do the stereotypical couple thing and ride the ferris wheel

But! It got stuck when you were almost to the top (if only it had been at the top - it would have been peak amusement park date romance)

You two were so ready to kiss at the top, but now you get to make out for like 30 minutes?? Awesome!

Getting to have a whole photo shoot together with all the pretty lights from the park and the city?? Double awesome!

Sitting in the cramped seat and being able to just talk and cuddle without worrying about school or anything?? Tripple awesome!!!

Everything about the night was perfect, and now you two love going on amusement park dates (tho none will ever beat this one)

N = Nickel (Do they spoil? Do they buy the person they love everything?)

He won't Spoil you too much, hes broke anyways

Besides, hes not the most materialistic person anyways so he would rather give you gifts of like dates and stuff

When he does give gifts, it's more personal things

Hell spoil you for your birthday and anniversary tho, if you really want something hell do his best to get you it

O = Orange (What colour reminds them of their other half?)

Pink

Why?

Because he loves that cute blush of yours ~

He teases you all the time, anything to get you to blush

So when he sees a pink, especially in the shade of your blush, he kinda smirks and is like aw

Also, its such a soft color, and you're his baby so he gets soft for you

So honestly pastel colors remind him of you too, but mainly pink

P = Pet names (What pet names do they use?)

ANYTHING that will get you to blush

Hes tested out them all

Honey, sugar, babydoll, bub, cutie, EVERYTHING

But his favorites are baby, and kitten.

He likes cats so he tested out kitten and the BLUSH that erupted on your face, he was hooked

Q = Quaint (What is their favourite non-modern thing?)

My dude he is so into ball room dancing

Like I guess that's modern if you're rich, but neither of you are so that's something you only see in like old movies

Dead ass he took you to an abandoned castle just to dance with you while he played music from like the 40s

R = Rainy Day (What do they like to do on a rainy day?)

Loves rain

Wants to go play in it

He will drag you out into the rain so that you can run around and act like little kids

Then you'll come in eventually so you dont get sick and make tea and cuddle

S = Sad (How do they cheer themselves/others up?)

Hes more of the type that will just ignore his feelings when hes sad

Like it's no big deal they'll go away

But you got mad at him for doing that so now - he just tells you

Hell text you and be like "hey.. can we cuddle..."

And you'll immediately know what's up and run to cheer him up

When you're sad, he takes a more direct approach

He wants you to tell him straight up what's wrong, and hes willing to wait if you need time

Hell hold you until you're ready, but he won't leave until you're feeling better

T = Talking (What do they like to talk about?)

He loves gossipping

Like you two talking about dumb stuff your classmates do

Makes up like 70% of your conversations

Also about movies, or TV shows, hes into a lot of fandoms and loves talking about them

U = Unencumbered (What helps them relax?)

You

Playing

With

His

Hair

That's it

Hes stressed? He will plop himself into your lap and you just know

V = Vaunt (What do they like to show off? What are they proud of?)

He likes showing off his martial art skills honestly

Hes gotten good at them, and many of the students dont bother with learning any formal fighting style since they're more into just using their quirk or swinging as they please

So it's something hes proud of

Hes also proud of it cause the 2 people he looks up to the most - aizawa and you - are also proud of him for it

So he loves showing you new things hes learned, or showing you how to do them so that you can be safer

W = Wedding (When, how, where do they propose?)

Again, hes spontaneous, so it kinda just came out

You two were just goofing around one night - spending time with each other since soon you would go into working at an agency since you had graduated

He was just thinking about how much hes gonna miss not being able to be around you all the time

So this man deadass ran into a gas station that was still open, bought a ring pop, and ran back out and was like

"Shit babe I'm so sorry this is such a horrible proposal but I'm doing it cause I don't wanna back out so- (y/n), will you marry me?"

Hes down on one knee holding this ring pop and he expected you to start laughing (you did later) but instead you started crying and you just jump into his arms nodding

X = Xylophone (What’s their song?)

Serendipity by BTS

His world changed when he met you, the love his life

Theres so much hurt in life, and you are his happiness

Even when you two fight, you only come back stronger

Hes so happy with you, and so hes worried that something will happen to take you away from him

This song kinda captures that

Y = Yes (Do they ever think of getting married/proposing?)

Yes

All the time

He planned it a few times fully before when he actually did, and they were all much more romantic than the ring pop

He thought of the ring and everything

Z = Zebra (If they wanted a pet, what would they get?)

Cat

Do I even need to say that

He wants you two to be crazy cat parents so bad

Even tho the max you ever have at a time is 2

#bnha #mha #boku no hero headcanons #boku no hero imagines #boku no hero fanfic #boku no hero academia #boku no hero x reader #shinsou imagine #shinsoubnha #shinsou headcanons #shinsouhitoshi #mhaheadcanons #fluff alphabet #shinsouxreader #shinsoufluff

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partialbirthabortion · 4 years

Note

Hi, I think I remember you saying that you work at Planned Parenthood (sorry if I have this wrong). I was just wondering, I'm about 4 weeks pregnant and I want to terminate, my preferred method would be the abortion pill. The side effects are a little terrifying and the GP I spoke to said the surgery can be better as its a quick procedure but I would need to wait. I'm just wondering if you had any advice? I feel like surgery makes it all a bit too real and I want to do something to end it asap.

Hey, thank you for reaching out! I do work at an abortion clinic. I will do the best I can to be thorough within the bounds of what I think is okay for me to describe on my public internet blog outside of work, and without overwhelming you during a time I am sure is already very overwhelming; if you want to send follow-up questions, please feel free! If you want to message me privately, please feel free!

First off: you are going to be totally, completely fine. Abortion is very, very safe. Abortion is significantly more safe than childbirth. It is totally normal and fine to be nervous, but whichever method you choose, you are going safe and fine. Discomfort, cramping, pain, are real and matter, but you will get through to the other side no matter which way you go. There is no right or wrong answer, and your comfort is absolutely paramount. Whatever you choose, I’m sure you will make the right decision for your lifestyle, your body, your concerns, your schedule, your anxieties. You should trust yourself. You totally got this.

Now, my honest advice? Personally, I would tell a friend, sister, or loved one to do the in-clinic surgical procedure. For a couple of reasons: there is practically no failure rate with a surgical, and about a 3% failure rate with the pill. The pill comes with a mandatory follow up for either a second ultrasound or a pregnancy test (because of the failure rate) and in the case of a continuing pregnancy, you would need to either retake the pill or do an in-clinic anyway. Most people are fine to return to normal activity the day after a surgical abortion, whereas many people are out of work or school for up to five days after the pill. Pain and cramping are usually manageable with just 800mg doses of ibuprofen after a surgical (especially as early as you are!), but many people require narcotic management during the pill process. Etc, etc.

None of these mean that you can’t take the pill, or that the pill might not be best for you. 4 weeks is still very, very early, and the early you are, the easier the pill process is. If you want the procedure to feel more natural, like a miscarriage, you probably want the pill. If you want you partner to be in the room while the process is happening, you probably want the pill. If you want to be in your own bed, watching your own tv, with your own food, you probably want the pill. If you really just need to get it over with and not wait until you’re eligible for the surgical (about 6 weeks along), you probably want the pill. If surgery in general, or pelvic exams, or speculums, are major anxieties for you, you may want the pill.

I am gonna break down the two in a little more detail under the cut just in case you need it, but a few miscellaneous bits of advice: 1. Buy yourself a big pack of maxi pads or overnight pads. You should not use tampons for the first day after an in-clinic, or the first week after taking misoprostol. 2. Starting hormonal birth control very soon after an abortion (your provider can tell you exactly when depending on which way you go) can really help regulate and reduce the amount of bleeding you experience. 3. If you take the pill, eat an hour prior to taking the miso, and take your pain and anti-nausea meds half an hour after you eat and before you take it (it’s rough to take on an empty stomach, and you want to give your meds time to start working). 4. Take your pain meds preemptively, don’t wait until you’re actively uncomfortable

Truly wishing you all the best and sending you all my love! You’ll make the right decision for you, I’m sure.

The way the abortion pill works (at my clinic): You receive an ultrasound, and some basic labwork. You sit with an “educator” for anywhere for about 20 minutes discussing your medical history, the process, answering any questions you have. You meet a clinician (NP) or doctor who reviews your medication instructions and sits with you while you take your first medication, mifepristone, which stops the pregnancy from growing, and you should leave feeling pretty much the same as when you came in. You’ll go home with a prescription for anti-nausea medications, ibuprofen and a narcotic. You’ll take four tablets of misoprostol between 1 and 48 hours later either bucally/orally or vaginally. Side effects will start within a few hours of taking the miso and will be most intense within the first 24 hours, but the process can take several days, and some women are unable to go to work or school as long as five days. It’s normal to be soaking a maxi pad every hour in the first day. It’s normal to pass blood clots, sometimes up to the size of a lemon, in the first day or two or three. Spotting for up to 4-6 weeks is normal (shorter if you start a hormonal birth control). In about a week to two weeks, you return to the clinic to repeat your ultrasound or a pregnancy test to confirm it worked.

The way the in-clinic abortion works (at my clinic): If you are going to be sedated, you fast after midnight and bring a guest. At your appointment, you receive an ultrasound, and some basic labwork. You sit with an “educator” for anywhere for about 20 minutes discussing your medical history, the process, answering any questions you have. You get pre-op meds (for cramping and to prevent infection). The procedure itself is about 3-5 minutes long. The doctor does a pelvic exam and inserts a speculum, just like at a pap smear. She cleans off your cervix with soap, and then manually dilates your cervix. She inserts a plastic tube into your uterus through your cervix and uses gentle suction to remove the pregnancy. We watch your vitals in recovery for about thirty minutes, make sure everything is normal and okay, then send you home with a prescription for more ibuprofen, a snack, and some information packets. It’s normal to have a light to medium period flow for the first few days, and spot for up to 4-6 weeks (shorter if you start hormonal birth control). It’s normal to pass blood clots, possibly up to the size of a golf ball. Once you leave, you don’t have to contact us again except with questions or concerns.

#reproductive justice #about abortion

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cerastes · 5 years

Note

Something I wanted to ask you a few days ago but then you suddenly actually fucked off to the South Pole: Can I ask about your tabletop characters? I know there's Rasmus and a someone named Lisbeth, I think? Do you have more? I'm always up and eager to hear about fruits born from your disaster head.

I do not have more, it’s those two, my beautiful shit children. Rasmus is for my DnD game and Lisbeth is for my Fate Core game. It’d be A PLEASURE to regale you with The Lore:

If you’ve read my tabletop blogging posts, and you likely have given you’re asking about the good ol’ lovable Human Rogue, then you’re already somewhat familiar with Rasmus Kasper Istre. A 24 year old charlatan and swindler through and through, back in his port hometown, Rasmus was a notorious “fortune teller” that scammed many tourists and merchants, an act made easier by the innate superstitious nature of sailors, and while his daggers are sharp, it’s his creativity that cuts deeper, fighting being his very last option as he will always attempt to fool, sabotage and trick others first, only brandishing harm if there’s no other choice. In stark contrast with his enthusiasm when it comes to taking money from others, Rasmus is vehemently opposed to taking lives unless it’s on self-defense or if the one relinquishing their life deserves it, a philosophy he sticks to even if it bites him in the ass. This is, in fact, what triggers his escape from his town: He swindled the riches right out of a big-time Elf magnate, disabled his bodyguard that came gunning for him some time later and even had the perfect chance to off him, yet refused to do so because, as he learned during his time hiding from him, the magnate is actually a really honest if grumpy guy who treats his subordinates fairly and with love, and he’s not about to take that life, opting instead to hit the road. He used to dual wield daggers, but lost one of the daggers during a sky-high encounter with wyvern riders, using an enchanted gauntlet imbued with lightning in the spur of the moment to fight with fist and blade, and he liked how it worked out, so now he uses the lightning gauntlet to deliver close-range blasts and electric grapples with the left hand while his deft dagger whistles with each swipe and lunge of his right. To not inconvenience himself and others, he wears a half cape draped over his left arm so he can touch things and people without thundershocking them or having to remove the gauntlet and risk being ambushed (wearing a glove in the middle of a fight is kinda hard!). He loves wearing cologne, especially one made with ghostshroom extract that he makes himself. People hate the strong smell of it at first but it sort of grows into them like an acquired taste or Stockholm Syndrome, and his favorite foods are juniper berries and beef jerky. Rasmus is 177 centimeters tall, has curly light brown hair, dull green eyes, wears his beard as a stubble, and has an average, fit build. Do NOT call him “Kasper” unless you’re in the mood for a bar fight. Mostly wears leather armor and has a thing for the color green.

Rasmus is childhood friends with Claudia, the party’s Human Wizard, and the two often snipe at each other with affectionate vitriol, although their attempts to screw the other over with money are very real. No hard feelings, though, that’s what it meant to grow poor in a port town, it’s your fault if something is taken from you. He doesn’t always see eye to eye with the Halfling Ranger (Ranger is rather kill-happy, which doesn’t sit well with Rasmus), and is buddy-buddy with the Orc Barbarian, especially when brothels and taverns are concerned. He currently is invested in helping the Orc Barbarian with his character arc whenever he can, as well as furthering his own Money Quest after accidentally starting a religion, the Solar Sect (it’s a long story). After enough deeds, the party received the blessings from Phantom Animal Lords from the wilderness, with Rasmus’ title being “Rabbit”; This is an inside joke referring to how my DM and the rest of my DnD group call Rasmus “Bugs Bunny” due to his trademark outlandish and creative ways of setting up the board to the party’s advantage and problem solving. Among his faithful, he is known as the Augur-spoken Prophet, and it’s really, really spiraling out of control. Initially, Rasmus and Claudia were supposed to hate each other, but Claudia’s player and I, IRL friends since a long time now, decided to make them shitlord friends instead. We were very involved with the creation of both characters and develop them continuously together now. Check the “Rasmus” tag in my blog for more anecdotes of his balls to the walls DnDventures.

Some of his deeds include:

Killing a seemingly unkillable hero by teleporting him high into the sky and letting gravity do the work, using a circumstantial item.

Strapping the corpse of said unkillable hero to a greatshield and creating an extremely powerful shield for our Barbarian to use whenever we need some nigh invulnerability.

Accidentally started a religion when he was accused of high heresy because he defiled the corpse of a hero by turning him into a shield.

Flirting with an Elf Priestess that turned out to be the magnate’s niece.

Flirting with her further anyway.

Naked Parkour in the Elf capital.

Wrapped his phony crystal ball with a chain and used it as an impromptu weapon after being disarmed, cracking a Chaos Dwarf’s skull with a nat 20 swing.

Earned the ‘Rabbit’ title, which apparently only happens once around every 3000 years, as the Rabbit Phantom Animal Lord is capricious and her favor only goes to those cheeky and cunning enough to both amuse her and impress her. Of all those, he’s apparently the second Human to ever have earned the title. Rasmus wears it with pride.

–

The other is Lisbeth Elstad. Now, you’re no doubt thinking to yourself “Wow! No one has a name like that!” And you’re right! Consider that a stage name, or a pseudonym, if you will. In a setting that takes place in the real world after magic and everything from beyond turned out to be real and has suddenly become widespread public knowledge, 19 year old Lisbeth is incredibly inept at even the most basic magic tasks with two exceptions: Mana Layering, the act of creating sheets, layers, and shells of mana, and Alchemy, the ability to turn one thing into another through meticulous formulas and the Law of Equivalent Exchange. In addition to this narrow scope, Lisbeth has always found it oddly easy when it comes to assembling explosives ranging from homebrew fireworks to high-yield plastic explosive custom formulas such as batches of SEMTEX and C4. Finally, Lisbeth is a natural woman of science, a passionate love for biology, physics and chemistry pulsating within her noodle, unfit body. You could say she’s a Human Alchemist/Bombardier of some sort, but her most heartfelt wish is to become a doctor and pharmaceutic. Now, this probably paints the image of a kind, earnest girl that just wants to help out with a smile, right? Well! That’s not quite it! As noble as she sounds, Lisbeth is quite the thug otherwise. Think of her less as a friendly doctor in the making and more of a really shady back alley doc that looks like she came right out of a The Misfits music video. She tries, oh, lord she does, to come across as classy, eloquent, and elegant, but no matter how much Calvin Klein “One” you spray on a rabid boar, it is still a rabid boar, and as soon as her very little threshold of patience is usurped, the elegant business front crumbles and the reality of a violent, easily angered busybody who happily solves her problems with rocks to the back of the head and high yield explosives lays bare. She’s the foster daughter of a famous nomadic mercenary leader known as the Mercury Witch, leader of the White Silhouette, and worked on board their craft as assistant doctor, with the Witch forbidding Lisbeth of taking part on any training that might foster her latent violent tendencies in hopes of mellowing her out. One day, however, they took on a job in which Lisbeth and her mentor, Melicia, ended up unwittingly making REALLY Bad Drugs instead of the Good Medicine they thought they were making for supernatural creatures, Lisbeth found out, they found out she found out, shit hit the fan, everyone’s MIA.

Not much to say about her yet otherwise, as the game is still in its preliminary phase. Instead, I can tell you about the scrapped 27 year old version of Lisbeth that I heavily modified after we discussed things and realized I had to make her much younger for it to make sense with certain aspects of the plot. This version of Lisbeth is still very much the same in terms of abilities, but has quit the White Silhouette on her own terms and roams around as a masked vigilante that aids supernatural beings oppressed by humans and as a doctor that helps supernatural beings for free. Most of her time is devoted to finding locations that traffic supernaturals or pits them in underground arena fights and dismantles them with the superior firepower and flair of plastic explosives and some good ol’ infiltration. During her time in France, she was suddenly attacked by a girl in traditional Japanese priestess attire, inciting what nearly was a deathmatch between the two of them. As the mystery girl realized Lisbeth wasn’t her target, however, she immediately stopped and apologized. The girl, named Yamaoka Keiko, is a prophet and descendant of the Blind Dragons who could see the future. The problem, she explained, was that her eyes were stolen and replaced with ones that can see, and she hates it. She’s looking for whoever it is stole her blind, silver eyes to claim them back and go back to her peaceful, beloved life of comfortable darkness and peace back in her shrine. Lisbeth, however, seems to have a clue about who it could be that can steal and switch something like eyes without any difficulty, and believing this to be fate as well as her responsibility indirectly, offers to travel with Keiko in search for her eyes. The two become good friends over the course of 18 months of traveling together in this adventure, but Keiko takes an extremely grave wound one day and is left unable to move for a good while, even with all of Lisbeth’s medical knowledge. Finding herself alone and unsure of Keiko’s future, Lisbeth decides to join the official magic law enforcement outfit that she hates in order to gain access to their information network. I’ll probably use this version of Lisbeth for other things, since I don’t wanna scrap it, bwahaha, probably with Glock Elf and TechSlime (and same with Keiko).

Regardless of her version, Lisbeth has an intravenous hose installed inside of her arms that leads to a “cauldron” in her torso, utilizing “internal alchemy” to transform proteins and cells into other chemicals, which she then expels through holes on the palms of her hands. This way, she can spray, say, napalm out of her hands. Since she has absolutely no competence at all in the art of magic but has an innate talent when it comes to chemistry and alchemy, she instead “fakes” magic by creating concoctions with her knowledge. Lisbeth stands at 176 centimeters, has a lanky, thin physique, and wears silver contacts (which is why Keiko thought she had her eyes) and hair dyed a very light creamy blonde. She wears classy suits and long-skirted jumper dresses for the most part, with an Orthrus (two-headed wolf) pelt draped over her shoulders, both heads dangling off her left shoulder. Her choice of attire and appearance, much like her pseudonym, are all part of her “business front”. Despite her bluster, she’s rather cowardly, but also extremely resolute. Lisbeth is the kind of character that would usually be the NPC Shopkeeper that sells you potions and charges you a small fee to fully heal your party, but circumstance has thrown her right into the adventurer’s shoes, and now she has to deal with it crying, screaming, and complaining, but hey, at least she gets to put her knowledge of bombs to good use!

#rasmus #lisbeth #tiza #long post #whoops I gone and made a wall without meaning to

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retaindearsweetperfection · 3 years

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What a cold week

Hola!

Currently, I am watching some movie about the whaley house. I believe it’s called “The Haunting of Whaley House.” I find it to be terribly cheesy, yet here I am, still watching it. I can’t tell if it’s supposed to be a paranormal comedy or serious. I think it’s trying to be a parody of most ghost movies. The jokes are bad, but they still make me chuckle, because they’re so bad. Purposefully bad? I’m serious...I really hope it is truly a comedy horror.

Anyways, winter finally hit in Louisiana. I mean, it hit once already, but it hit for a full week this time. We don't typically get snow, but we got it quite a bit this year. We don't know how to function in snow and ice, so everything shut down. I guess that's why I'm blogging. I've reached my peek of being at home doing nothing and my creativity is blossoming like a rose. Particularly like the rose Daniel got me for Valentines. Puh...he said we were skipping valentines this year and he got my flowers anyways.

OOHH the wedding deets.

I'm engaged! So, I've been doing lots and lots of wedding planning. We're getting married in May, so yeah....I've been running around all stressed (with school and mothering as well). I want to share all the cute things I got the bridesmaids! And the wedding stuffs. We still need a lot of floral things and the centerpieces. I need to get my dress altered (I'm too short) but I have to get my shoes in first, they're on there way from the other side of the world. Greece I think. They're nothing too fancy, I can wear them once the wedding is over too.

I decided to not get a wedding band. I really like the simplicity of one ring and the engagement one is so pretty. Our colors are black, white, and hunter green with natural wood. Our food will be dirty rice, boudin, crab cakes, broccoli and cheese casserole, lasagna balls, cheesy jalapeno dip, and....I think that's it. And the reception will be at Park Manor Plantation Home. Very southern...It's sad, but I just realized it's very southern. Hmm....I like it. I'm so ready for it. I'm ready to be married to Daniel and celebrate! I'm also ready for it to be over so I can stop thinking about it so much!

Oh my anxiety has gotten mucho better! They upped me to 40mg and I have felt so calm and collective lately. Like...I'm not a horrible mess. I was able to talk to someone I don't know by myself without sweating or feeling like they hate me. I've always wondered how that feels, and I can do it now. I still have anxiety, especially with food, but I everything feels so much better. I think being in History instead of Atmospheric Science has really helped me out too.

Daniel was sick last week. I keep telling him it was just a sinus infection but his mom freaked out and was all like "YOU HAVE COVID" and he started to believe it. Every since Isla had pink eye everyone keeps thinking this means she had covid and gave it to Daniel. I took her to the doctor....she didn't have covid. We literally were quarantined for 2 weeks and then she got pink eye after visiting her cousin who had pink eye (Nathan is really dumb sometimes).

*PAUSE*

The movie has ended and it's time to find another one.

Ok, I put on Hellier. I've seen it but it makes for good background noise.

*UNPAUSE*

So Daniel began thinking he must have the flu or covid. So he finally decided to go to the doctor. You know those memes and jokes about men thinking they are dying when all they are barely sick? Daniel is pro at that. I'm gonna add a picture to this post now. Anyways, Daniel was negative for flu and covid. WHOA. Who would have guessed! He was literally just coughing up phlegm and because of his hacking his throat go sore. But WhAT Do I kNow. He's adorable, but sometimes I wish he would listen to me like he likes me listening to him. If the tables were turned he would be shoving nose spray up my nose for me. He feels better now and he accepts that I was probably right but it's good to be cautious....BUT WE NEVER WENT OUT and nobody we know has covid so how would he mysteriously get it?! My argument was invalid.

#life update #checking in #blogging

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