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missmouse25 · 2 years

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Beach haul. Honestly very proud of myself for not bringing home more rocks than I did.

#because I can assure you:#the temptation was there #ThatKindaVibe

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uncanny-tranny · 7 months

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Basically, my philosophy around disability fakers is: I would rather a thousand people fake a disability than have one disabled person suffer without care, aids, compassion, or any help.

#disability #disability advocacy #and there's a difference not many people seem to recognize between faking and realizing you don't have [x] problem...#...such as realizing you don't have [x] disorder because it is instead [y] disorder...#...or you haven't completely understood your care needs/your symptoms/what helps you...#...and some people see ANY change in your understanding of your disability as proof of maliciously faking...#...when i suppose in my personal experience people don't *maliciously* fake disability...#...i'm not saying it could never happen but that i don't think it's the *only* thing motivating people called fakers #i just think (like most everything) this is complex and nuanced because it's a *human* experience #like for me personally i /know/ i still have a lot to learn about my disabilities...#...like... i realized recently that my hands shouldn't be in AGONY when warm water is ran over them when it's SLIGHTLY cold inside or out...#...and i realized that i likely have a Noticable limb difference that needs checking out. does this sound like i'm faking...#...or that maybe i just didn't really explore my own needs and body because of a variety of factors?#i can assure you it is because i haven't really thought before about how i deserved to understand how to best help myself

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turtleblogatlast · 2 months

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[ cw: nightmares / trauma / ]

Post-invasion, Mikey sneaks into Leo’s room and when asked by Leo what the problem was, Mikey just smiles and says since he’s awake and knew Leo would be too, he didn’t want either of them alone. Leo laughs and lets Mikey stick around, both of them clumped together on Leo’s bed, watching grainy compilations of old Lou Jitsu commercials on Leo’s phone.

Technically, Mikey didn’t lie. He just didn’t explain everything that led him to Leo’s room. He didn’t explain the nightmare of his arms burning up too bright, too fast, destroyed before Raph and Donnie have a chance to help. He didn’t explain how he woke up with a wail caught in his throat, phantom pain in his arms and chest alike chasing away any semblance of exhaustion. He didn’t explain how his mind made sure he knew, vividly, that if one thing went wrong with his portal, then he would have never seen Leo again.

He didn’t explain, and he didn’t have to. Leo knows his brothers better than he knows himself, and Mikey has always been easy to read. So it’s no trouble to let Mikey know that he’s still with them, that Leo is here and alive with everyone else. And when Mikey finally regains his exhaustion and falls asleep leaning against Leo, Leo simply maneuvers him into a more comfortable position and stays by his side.

He doesn’t move, doesn’t go to sleep - not that he could, anyway. He just mindlessly scrolls on his phone, the soft snores of his little brother filling the room. He stays in place, awake, because he wants to be sure that when Mikey wakes up again it’s to the immediate sight that Leo is alive and well and home.

And, if Leo’s bring honest, that’s a reminder not just for Mikey’s sake.

#rottmnt #rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles #rottmnt mikey #rottmnt leo #rise mikey #rise leo #portal pals #one of my favorite things about Mikey is how self assured he really is not only in his skills but in his sense of self #but no matter how confident you are how much faith in yourself and others you have anyone can be struck by what ifs #and trauma isn’t so easily brushed over #so I can easily see Mikey struggling occasionally with the notion that ah. I did it. but what if I didn’t.#bros the worlds best mystic warrior in part because he can do real miracles #but miracles are only thought to be so because they’re near impossible feats #and with the knowledge that he is capable of opening timelines…I wonder if a part of Mikey fears falling into one where he failed #now - Mikey is not one to get wrapped up in insecurity he really isn’t #but for something so important and such a possible fear? at the very least I can see his subconscious manifesting a nightmare or two #most likely more - he’s a kid after all #they all are #ANYWAY love this duo lol #almost positive I wrote something similar to this wayyyyyy long ago but bleh I’ll write it again idc idc

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tomurakii · 5 months

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I like bloodweave. Okay. But I DON'T like the version of them in fanfic where Astarion is a dick and Gale is like. Whining and pleading for him to be emotionally vulnerable (or just. Nice to him) prior to the relationship being established. Because that is just not accurate. Gale needs the player to express interest in him during his weave-teaching scene before he even considers hitting on them properly. Gale is entirely resigned to his fate and needs someone else to pull him away from it. Gale only starts being sweet and romantic and devoted after you accept his love confession and give him hope for the future. Gale says fuck all and then slinks away to cry privately if you break up with him.

Like he isn't chasing after people lmao. He isn't dropping to his knees and crying about anything much less this dickhead he met a week ago. He is overwhelmingly passive about literally everything personal to him up to and including his own death (provided there are no casualties/there is a good reason) until after the player expresses that they care about him. Astarion is not doing that in any of these fics.

Like Gale is friendly and a dork and doesn't wanna get murdered but he fully has a suicide plan. He thought the artefacts would help him survive but he didn't believe he'd ever truly live again. If Gale confessed and Astarion said/did like one (1) mean thing afterward Gale's romance is closed off forever. He's wandering into the forest to cry. He's killing himself immediately. His fragile ego and self worth can't take it. You have to understand that when we joke about him being pathetic it's not bc he's like. Sopping wet and chasing people down and begging for a scrap of attention. It's because he craves affection but would literally rather die than ask or even hope for it until someone else forces that hope back into his serotonin-deficient tadpole brain.

#i feel like u can tell when a bloodweave fic is written by an astarion stan vs a gale stan lol #because the astarion stans are just using gale as a vessel for like. their sopping wet meow meow #who screams and cries until astarion becomes emotionally vulnerable with them #which gale would not do. realistic bloodweave is astarion tries to fuck him in act 1 and he refuses because of the orb #and then astarion is like “boo what the fuck. change of plans” and gale is like “okay” and they never speak of it again lol #anyway #please god the gale characterisation in this place. half of you make him the soppiest most pathetic loser and the other half make him evil #he's not ACTUALLY a loser. when i joke about it the reason its funny is because its not true #hes just a regular guy with depression lol. hes not out here debasing himself begging for some old twink to care abt him #bg3 #gale dekarios #bloodweave #gale of waterdeep #does this make sense. i havent slept #i just mean that if you want gale to be sappy he needs to have like. prior assurance that his feelings are reciprocated #because if he doesnt have that and astarion is a dick to him he WILL just give up on the relationship #like hes not hunting people down after they deliberately upset him. i see so many fics where they create tension by lime #*like #having astarion openly fuck someone else after establishing a sort-of relationship with gale. for the drama #like hey. gale fully dumps you if you do that in game!! you have no way to convince him not to. he will dump astarion for that permanently

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devine-fem · 3 months

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reminder that it is STILL not okay to tell people what to ship and what not to ship. “don’t ship that, [canon/popular ship] is right there-“ STOP THAT. you’re not doing anyone a favor, you’re just annoying. go get your refill, hope this helps!

#hating a ship is different because you are not obligated to like anything #but don’t tell people they can’t like it because i assure you they can #and the sooner you come to terms with that #the easier you will be to be around for everyone #because i assure you if thats how you walk with life #people have to pretend to like you and thats whats sad #jondami #damijon #timkon #konbart #batjokes #riddlebat #birdflash #superbat #stephcass #timber #jayroy #dc comics #batfam

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regulusrules · 29 days

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My breaths are run by your compass

In honour of Merlin STILL trending, here's ACT VI two days earlier featuring the long awaited conversation between our two idiots🤍🗡

#merlin #bbc merlin #can you tell that I am insane?#because I so assure you that I am #merlin fic #ao3 #merthur #arthur pendragon #king arthur #merlin fanfic #merthur fic #regulusrules recs

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askblueandviolet · 1 month

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What made you decide to attempt fixing the podium up?

MASTER POST

Previous 💜

Next 💜

#lego monkie kid #lego monkie kid fanart #monkie kid #monkie kid fanart #lmk #lmk fanart #monkie kid macaque #lmk macaque #blue and violet #there's nothing charitable about this I can assure you #he just wants to clear his record and get his job back #he wants to be doing theatre #and he also wants money to pay the electricity bills #because he STILL has no running power in his flat #but he'll get it was soon as he has income again

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panncakes · 5 months

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stuck thinking about when day gets crowded and overwhelmed on his birthday he calls out to gee of all people there to remove him from the situation; and how when day tells her he wants to be alone she makes sure he knows she wants to understand him and he can talk to her (not to help him or to fix things for him; simply to understand him) and when day reaffirms a boundary she accepts this and doesn't press further. he's her friend and she cares for him but he's still an adult and she has no problem treating him as such and i think that at the moment she is the only one from day's past who is actively able to do so

#last twilight #gee best girl #i know disability is difficult on loved ones as well and it is very easy for those closest to you to fall into pitying and babying you #but gee has been working very hard to not let that happen to her friendship with day #she is immediately ready to keep teasing and playing with day whilst also quick to adjust to the new aspects of their relationship #she wants to learn how to guide day through the badminton court to take over from 'his mhok' and is more than willing to take day #to the bathroom in the bar but when day assures her he can handle it she doesn't infantalize him #she immediately invites day to the bar without any hesitation and then continues to invite him to her game because that's #an important aspect of their friendship #and when he shows up she isn't afraid to joke around and tease him #she's extremely good at not treating him like a broken piece of porcelain whilst also quickly taking cues in how to adjust where it is #necessary #im glad day gets someone from his past who doesnt need as much time as his family to readjust to his new normal #and it is also an incredibly good parallel to how bad augustus' assessment of the situation is #last twilight the series

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dyrewrites · 4 months

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Let teenagers experiment.

Let them figure themselves out without judgement or pressure to be anything yet.

Let them have what you didn't/don't.

Let them revel in their lack of responsibility.

They're not adults, but they're not kids, and it isn't terribly fun existing in-between.

Let them be.

If you are a teenager, try to find a way to enjoy this weird time when your body hates you, your brain might want you dead, everyone is telling you what you are and what to be and even your peers are judging you mercilessly.

Find what brings you joy and cling, just fucking cling. Revel in that thing that makes you smile, no matter how much it makes those around you cringe. If it brings you joy, it is worth your time.

It's hard, but you can do it.

You'll live through it. You'll be changed, maybe a little cracked, but hopefully unbroken.

#rambles #brought to you by my son worrying that he might be gay because boys are pretty but also so are girls and what is that #and my assuring him that he can love whoever he wants and his father and i will still love him #and also girls are super pretty and his mother is bi and his dad would totally jump into bed with johnny depp if he had the chance #there's no judgement in this house #but there is at school #and other places outside this house #so i wrote this thing #please be safe teenagers #and know that if you have nowhere and no one else #i mean it's not much nor am i but you're safe here and i'll love ya for whoever you are

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poppyflavour · 5 months

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Must have been hard watching your friends forget about your existence. But the reward is unimpeachable, right?

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marzipanandminutiae · 8 months

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honestly same, am kind of sick of people assuming if you like / dont mind your body you have to constantly 'show it off'. can't i just exist? big believer in women's rights to be comfortable and not feel compelled to shave / "show crack" (swimwear especially) !!

If you cover up, you're a prude and/or self-loathing. (and apparently, if you express that decreased sexualization for strangers is a fringe benefit, you're Dressing For The PatriarchyTM)

If you show skin, you're a slut and/or unintelligent. and...apparently ALSO dressing for the patriarchy!

Women really can't win. And people really don't get that the problem with concealing clothes of yore and of today is/was not the clothes themselves, but the fact that women HAD/HAVE to wear them or face social- and sometimes legal -consequences. Whereas now, we get the delightful situation of facing censure if we go "too far" one way or the other! Some governments- hi, France -actually mandate the amount of skin women and girls have to show at the beach or at school, especially women and girls of certain religions or ethnicities. While others demand that women cover up to their specifications, like in Iran. So fun, right ladies?!

(I've also heard some people say that women wearing long skirts is "unprofessional?" Look up "are maxi skirts professional" online and you'll find some surprising examples. A fair number of people seem to think there's MAXIMUM professional skirt length as well as a minimum. it's just bizarre)

#feminism #misogyny #it's still so bizarre to me that people can read 'I dress like a misplaced Victorian almost every day and make the clothes'#'but also it's cool that men can't see my legs and ass'#and immediately think 'SHE WOULDN'T DRESS LIKE THIS IF NOT FOR CATCALLERS!!!!'#girl nobody is braving the Brimfield Antiques Show in 90-degree weather to buy old trim they don't make anymore because of The Patriarchy #also dressing this way does not fully conceal my body shape? my torso still looks pretty Shaped I assure you

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whatohitsonfirewelp · 1 month

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You know what I will hate?

If someone else has to point out how Buck or Eddie feels. I know that’s a popular trope, but honestly? Fuck that.

Fuck having to tell a queer person who they’re supposed to be with, how they’re supposed to feel. I actually hate that so much. Because why, why is it that after being told we’re supposed to love certain people, and we realize we don’t, we’re told from ALL SIDES who we are supposed to love after we come out. From the people who don’t accept us to the people that do.

I don’t want Tommy telling Buck that hey man you’re in love with Eddie

I want Buck to realize and accept this on his own, it’s HIS choice it’s HIS life he’s finally free so Let Him Have The Control

I don’t want Marisol to tell Eddie he’s not in love with her, he’s in love with Buck. I actually HATE when fans decide the girlfriend has to take upon that role.

I want Eddie to have his own oh moment. I want Eddie to have this soft, happy, light feeling of being free.

I don’t want Christopher a literal chick to tell Buck and Eddie they’re in love.

I want them to discover it together on their own. I want them to talk to Christopher separately and together about it. Don’t involve a child in the love lives of adults.

I do not fucking want Hen (or Karen and Josh) to look at these two and say I called it.

THEY ARE ALSO QUEER!! They KNOW what it’s like to feel the need to keep this part of yourself a secret, to be scared, to be overwhelmed with emotions, to finally feel free.

I want them to be so so unbelievably happy and proud of Buck and Eddie and to not take away from their discovery of themselves.

I don’t want past girlfriends showing up and saying they knew something was off.

Because you know what? Let’s not make queer characters uncomfortable and guilty for something that wasn’t their fault, something they weren’t even AWARE of, or to feel any pain for a relationship that is very much over.

I don’t think you guys understand how much you seem to demand for us to get buddie as queer, to have Eddie and Buck as queer, and in the same breath want to take what that means away from them

Them realizing they are queer is not something that other characters should have a huge opinion or input on. It should be THEM worried about what others will say and think only to find out they are so loved by those who truly matter.

Coming out as queer is HUGE. It’s not easy, it can be confusing and it’s overwhelming. Let Buck, and if it happens then Eddie as well, go about their own journey their way. Stop forcing other characters, straight or queer, to be in it. It’s not about anyone else but them. It’s not a simple love story of two men that are already out. It’s about realizing hey, this thing I thought I was my entire life? It’s not true.

Let them process that and take it in and explorer what is a completely newworld.

#I swear to god I hate this fandom so much #STOP TAKING AWAY FROM A QUEER CHARACTERS JOURNEY #I see this in EVERY FANDOM #a already canon queer character does not NEED to be all knowing every time #they can be just as clueless and confused (especially when they’re also young)#or they can be just Happy for their friend or family and let them take their time to figure it out like THEY did #as someone who has come out before #and been told by a person that they weren’t surprised #that shit is NOT assuring or comforting it’s terrifying igs j #it’s horrible and it feels like your being #locked away again because How Can Someone Else Know before you figure it out and before you were Ready to share it #it’s really fucking telling how many of you are straight in the closet completely or have #the privilege to have never felt this before #because Buck and Eddie? they don’t have that #911 abc #whatoh back at it again #evan buckley #eddie diaz #buddie

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osamusriceballs · 6 months

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The Accident - Part VI

Atsumu x fem Reader

Warnings: None

Words: ~ 1,1 k

About: The flashback ends- but what will you do next?

Part I II -> Next Part

"You're not getting married."

Osamu's sharp remark did not have the intended effect. Both of you were still clinging to each other, acting all lovey-dovey.

"Samuu, you don't understand. She's my soulmate. I love her." Osamu's eyes almost popped out of their sockets while he kept watching how you two clung to each other and smiled like idiots, your hand on his cheek after he had said these words.

"You don't even know her. And stop touching her like that in public."

Atsumu's hands started wandering on your back, his fingertips teasing the bare skin on your back much to your delight - but to Osamu's horror.

"I don't mind - but who are you?" You turned towards him, and he paused for a second. You were beautiful, that much was certain. Shiny eyes, glossy lips, and a dress that looked like it had been made for you - but he quickly discarded every thought about your looks when he knew that he needed to stop this nonsense.

"I'm Osamu Miya. His brother."

"Oh." Your eyes widened as you took in his appearance, probably only then realizing how similar he looked to the man whose lap you were currently sitting on.

"Samu, we gotta go. The barkeeper told us that there's a priest next to this club."

"You're not getting married."

No matter how many times he repeated the sentence, it seemed like Atsumu was unable to understand.

xxxxxx

"And then you convinced me to get your car to drive us home. Wouldn't stop bickerin' about how it's expensive and designer and about how it costs more than Onigiri Miya will ever make. I'll definitely kick your ass for that."

A muscle under Osamu's eye twitches when he mentions the comment, and you have to hold back a snort at this. He's kind of cute when he's angry.

"And then?"

"You were gone. Found ya at the church, but it was too late. You idiots already signed the contract."

You slowly step back until your knees reach the bed, and you heavily sink down on it. It feels like he's telling you a story right out of a movie, not something that has happened just a few hours ago, the whole thing still too absurd and unreal.

"Can we redeem it?" You look at Osamu, like he's the only one that can save you now, and he somehow actually is. You still have hope that you can get out of this without negatively impacting the rest of your life.

"I've talked to our lawyer. It's a waterproof contract. Very surprising because the church was more than just a bit shady. You're both bound for a year until ya can file for divorce." His words feel like a death sentence, and you find yourself at a loss for words. You gulp at his words, blinking a few times to suppress your tears. You're an idiot—an idiot for getting in a situation like this.

It's silent.

You don't dare to look at either of them, your gaze only focused on the phone in your hands, and every passing second makes you feel even more uncomfortable, until you can't stand the silence anymore.

"I'll get going."

You stiffly get on your feet, your movements robotic and lifeless while you make an attempt to leave, but you're quick to get stopped by Atsumu before you can even make more than getting up. "Wait- I- I don't even have yer number!"

"Oh." You pause, standing there for a few moments while you watch Atsumu getting closer to you, until there is not much space left between the two of you when he stands right in front of you. "Hey- are you okay?" Concern laces his voice while he looks down at you, and you manage to nod with a forced smile. "Peachy."

Osamu snorts at your comment and shakes his head, a movement that you barely see in the corner of your eyes. He probably feels guilty for the whole situation too, the dark cicles under his eyes similar to Atsumu's, certainly because he tried to find a solution for this and did not sleep at all during the night. "People who say 'peachy' are anything but fine."

"Hey, look at me." Atsumu ignores his brother's comment and brings his hand to your cheek. You're startled but allow him to turn your face upwards until your eyes lock. "I'm not letting ya go when ya can't even walk properly. You'll eat something, then you'll take a nice hot shower and get in some clean clothes and then I'll bring ya home. That alright with you?" There is something about the way he softly states the words that sends a comforting wave of warmth through your body, and you find yourself nodding and trusting him.

"Hmm. Good girl. Now just eat the rest of the fries while Samu gets ya some clothes. Right, Samu?" Atsumu breaks the eye contact with you to look sharply at Osamu, who only sighs and nods. "I saw a souvenir shop at the lobby. Better than nothin'." You now look at Atsumu's side-profile, admiring his sharp jaw line, unable to do something else but wondering if there is even one bad angle on this perfect man, while Osamu leaves the room with another deep sigh.

"Shouldn't I have given him some money?" You take a deep breath and wipe your hands on your dress, noticing how clammy they got. Probably a side-effect of the nervousness.

Atsumu snorts and returns his gaze to you, an amused smile on his lips. "That serves him right. He always brags about how much he makes with his stupid restaurant." Atsumu looks so similar to Osamu when he rolls his eyes; it's almost comical. "Don't tell him I said that, but he really makes the best food ever. I'll take ya there and show you."

You hum approvingly, feeling somewhat a tingle run down your spine at the prospect of him taking you out for dinner but try to ignore it. "C'mon. Eat the rest of the fries. I saw how ya inhaled them. You can have mine too." He grins, something that makes him seem absolutely adorable, and you find yourself smiling back at him, a warm feeling running through your body.

"I'm not hungry anymore. I'll take a shower then?" You questioningly raise your brows, and he nods. "Yeah, of course. When Samu comes back, I'll put the clothes in front of the bathroom."

Thank you," you raise your hand as if to pat his shoulder, but you halt the movement just before reaching him. You shouldn't touch him. Technically, you don't even know him. His gaze flickers to your hand, and he appears to consider taking it. However, he quickly steps to the side, giving you some space to move to the bathroom.

Without looking back at him, you close the bathroom door, take a deep breath, and glance at the phone in your hand. You scroll until you find the picture of a bright-haired person—

and decide to finally make a call.

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puppyeared · 7 months

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ive made myself more wet and pathetic

#new icon because im SUFFERING. im in HELL #its so bad. i had to sign out of discord so now im both lonely and stressed #because i KNOW im still gonna get dstracted. i just did making this URGH #how good are brains at working around things. i once set a 7AM alarm on my phone with snooze cause i was so sure my brain would #be too lazy and keep snoozing instead of actually turning it off. but nay it either kept sleeping through the alarms and snoozing #or actually managed to turn off the alarm half awake that i barely remembered it and then waking up late #i actually have a track record of climbing out of bed and turning my alarm off without remembering. which is impressive bc i have a loftbed #the other thing is setting fake deadlines so make myself panic into doing things ahead of time. but unfortunately that doesnt work either #because if theres one thing my brain will put all its energy into remembering its self assurance. meaning i WILL be able to remember #the real deadline even if i try to trick myself. cant ask someone to give me a fake deadline either #the only things keeping me going rn is that i have deadlines due at least 1 day between each other and excitement being able to talk with #crow after break. but you can see how well thats going <- ignores long term rewards in favor of short term pleasure #BTW CROW IF YOURE READING THIS IM SO SORRY TURNING OFF MY DISCORD WITH BARELY ANY EXPLANATION #im a huge fucking dumbass and i had barely enough impulse control not to block everyone in my dms because i realized that would send a real #really bad msg. youre not distracting me im distracting myself and i promise youre not annoying me i just really like talking to you and #thats why im just barely stopping myself from signing in. I WANT TO TALK TO U LOTS BUT AT THE SAME TIME IM KICKING MYSELF FOR DOING IT #you can be a little mad at me btw cause i definitely could have done that better but i was all over the place abt how to do it without #making u think im ignoring you. IF THAT MAKES SENSE. SORRY #yapping #doodles #puppysona #edit but last week i tried to schedule and give myself work periods and break periods using my class schedule #and reminders on my phone to tell me when to start and stop. can you guess what happened

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uncanny-tranny · 8 months

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I often see this impulse from other trans men* that involves hypervigilance of being one of the "good men" who set ourselves apart from the men who hurt others, and I wonder if this ultra-policing actually prevents us from being "bad"

I wonder if agonizing about doing everything "right" is only contributing to poor mental health of trans men* because you are seeing a distorted, monstrous version of yourself, somebody with whom you have to kill off. It forces you into this space of having to be perfect, to beat yourself up over any perceived infraction.

And I just don't think it's an effective measure to ensure we are "one of the good ones." Constantly treating yourself as the beast, treating yourself like a leper who has no place in the civilized world? How does that ensure that you both treat others well but also ensure that you aren't fucking miserable every single moment you're not alone?

#trans #transgender #lgbt #lgbtq #ftm #nonbinary #i'm still trying to be More Normal arpund others because i still to this day immediately treat my manhood...#...like a slight. i can feel the way people stare when i am over-apologizing and they're assuring me to my face that i am /fine/...#...i accidentally touched a coworker and i could feel her amusement that i wouldn't accept her acceptance of my three+ apologies...#..i've heard so much about how Awful men are and i carry around this impulse both to protect my manhood but to also apologize that it exist #and that internal shame and isolation doesn't contribute positively because you aren't focused on action if that makes sense #you're so focused on not rocking the boat that your feet grow roots in the ground that prevent you from moving forward #and that feeling of being Stuck is honestly scary and isolating and there's a lot of self-hatred in that (at least in my experience)#because i KNOW what i believe about my manhood is wrong and yet... i often still believe it #it's fadcinating that you can know something is Wrong and yet still firmly believe in it with all your soul #why do i always make these thpe of posts while playing skyrim. damn you todd howard (lighthearted)

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crimeronan · 7 days

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i'm currently having a fascinating flareup where everything in my body is on fire, but instead of sleeping through it like i used to, i'm combating the physical urge to leave my apartment at 4:30 AM in my good shoes and literally just run as far as i physically can before i finally collapse and have to call a lyft home. this is not a practical thing to do when you still have a migraine that means you cannot look at streetlights or headlights or the rising sun. so i googled "why does pain make me want to run," because i thought surely this isn't just a me thing, maybe there's a pinched nerve somewhere or a muscular issue i can resolve, i Know there are subreddits Filled with chronic pain tips, whatever. unfortunately, google is not built for this kind of literalism, and so the entire first page of results is just ["you forget to cherish her" voice] "Oh..... Sweetheart..... Poor Suffering Babbu.... Honey Bunches Of Oats..... You Are So Afraid..... Of Your Own Self....."

#(yes you are allowed/supposed to laugh at this post.)#thank you google. i assure you i am not.#inevitably later today i'll be posting an update like 'walked 5 miles but then wandered into traffic and a passerby called an ambulance #just because i curled up and started screaming in the middle of the asphalt. why don't people mind their own fucking business'#i can see this very clearly in my 12-hours-from-now future.#i am in so much pain yall.#i dunno what the deal is. no feelings of doom so im not horribly worried but the ongoing migraine is um. not good.#anyway. i'll be fine but i may need to walk 5 miles into traffic first #autoimmune tag

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