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slutforitoshi · 11 months

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sae itoshi - secrets *:･ﾟ✧

ft. best friend’s brother!sae x f!reader, 18+ minors dni

cw: fingering, sexual activity in the same room/couch as someone else, slight dubious consent, orgasm denial

synopsis: how hard could it be to try to hide your most guarded secret from your best friend when the source of it lives with him?

wc: 1.3k (shorter one this time hehe)

A/N: ty for everyone that voted in the poll, it was hella close til the end lol

“i thought you weren’t a movie guy?” rin cocks an eyebrow as his brother weasels himself onto the couch that could barely contain 3 people. there was another one to the side of the room but for some reason sae opted for the empty spot next to you.

“got nothing better to do tonight” he shrugs, and the warmth of his body pressed up against yours is brought to the forefront of your mind.

movie nights were a weekly tradition between you and your best friend rin, almost as longstanding as your friendship tracing back to your highschool years. as college students now, it was an anticipated study break from the never-ending midterms.

his older brother sae worked in a nearby city, meaning that rin lived with him rent-free in his way-too-big apartment complete with a 70-inch 4k TV. with how often you were over, you were practically a third tenant. half of the reason was to spend time with rin, and the other half was one of the only secrets you kept from him.

the movie starts, and your eyes are glued to the screen, scared of the color it might bring to your cheeks if you were to give any attention to the pink-haired figure seated to the right of you. the sound of rin’s voice breaks your focus though, “shit, i forgot the popcorn.”

“how could you forget the popcorn?” you respond incredulously without acknowledging that you too had forgotten about it due to some distractions.

rin’s off to the kitchen, leaving only you and the source of those distractions. almost subconsciously your gaze drifts to his features, dimly lit by his small device. although rin resembled him greatly, sae had a more charismatic look. sharp jawline, tall nose bridge, and a permanently stoic expression.

you could never tell what he was thinking let alone feeling. the amount of times you’d seen sae smile had to be limited to the number of fingers on one hand. as he looked up to make eye contact with you however, you could’ve sworn an edge of his lip twitched upwards into what seemed like smirk before you too-quickly turned away.

you remember being attracted to sae from the moment rin introduced him, but it was usually easy enough to hide those feelings since sae was hardly around. but doing so with him positioned right next to you was a challenge you weren’t sure you could overcome.

rin’s return frees you from the thick tension and you’re shoveling popcorn in your mouth in an attempt to fill the pit growing in your stomach.

“hey! we need that to last til the end!” rin yanks the bowl away from you, earning a cold glare.

as the film starts again, the best friends are focused on the screen, completely unaware of the brother’s sinful intentions.

stray fingers approach your right thigh before resting on the inner portions. the touch has your breath hitching, but you don’t dare look away from the tv.

sae’s thumbs are rubbing light circles as the rest of his fingers wrap tighter around your upper thigh. the ministrations send heat across your body, pooling especially beneath your cotton shorts.

finally you look over to see sae’s still-expressionless features staring forward, giving not even the slightest hint of his actions. it’s unnerving how much of a mess he was making you while seeming completely unaware.

the circles continue before his hand shifts upward, resting briefly at the hem of your waistband before dipping under it. the acts concealed under the light blanket made your heart race, and you prayed they stayed unknown to rin.

the first contact with your clit sends a jolt of electricity through you, and you catch the yelp that nearly escapes your throat. you try to mask it as an awkward cough, but the intensity of sae’s teal eyes tells you his orders: stay quiet.

another smirk ghosts sae’s face as he feels the pool of slick gathered at his fingertips. a few light touches and your body was already begging for him.

your mind goes into a haze as he begins circles again, this time around your sensitive bud. the plot of the movie was forgotten at this point, with all your attention consumed by the pleasure coursing through you. you’re biting your lip now in an effort to stay silent, teeth pressing down so hard that any more pressure would bring the taste of iron.

“how are you guys liking it?” rin suddenly turns to ask, and panic fills you. you give a meek thumbs up, but before he could ask you more sae interjects.

“it’s better than i expected, but the buildup was slow. by the time any action happened i was already half checked out” he says nonchalantly. it amazed you how he had any recollection of that movie that had been long lost on you.

“well i heard it gets better” rin replied before turning away again, leaving you to finally be able to breathe.

the relief isn’t long-lived though, as sae prods two digits at your entrance. your eyes widen at the prospect, but they enter without much resistance. the stretch has your head falling back which was thankfully not noticeable enough for the dark haired boy to notice.

sae begins to pump slowly, the friction of his fingers dragging against your gummy walls in a way that renders you breathless.

your loss of composure only encourages him though, and he’s moving with more intention, shaking the blanket slightly at the increased pace. you’re silently chanting curse words as the heat builds, and it’s not long before you’re overlooking the familiar edge.

the clamping of your walls is a good enough indicator of the progress of your impending orgasm, so sae promptly pulls his digits out. you glare at him in protest of the emptiness, but he barely spares you a glance. it was still a little too early in the movie for him to finish up.

instead he’s running his fingers achingly slow across your folds, and every time his fingers would catch at the entrance, he would glide past it again, sending a rush of disappointment. the mind-numbing cycle was almost enough for you to throw away your dignity and beg vocally.

before you could say anything though his fingers plunge into you again, this time curling to hit a gummy spot that has you seeing stars. your back is arching slightly against the leather, and sae’s relieved that his brother was still too occupied to notice the erotic expression plastered across your face. it should only be for him to see.

sae’s resting his palm against your clit now, pressing down to produce ecstasy-like friction. you squeeze your eyes shut as the wave finally crashes through you. the orgasm is so powerful, a small moan claws its way past your lips, but is thankfully concealed by a well-timed explosion on screen.

the rest of the movie was spent with you trying desperately to understand what you missed from the movie whilst simultaneously wishing away the color from your cheeks and the heat from your abdomen. sae, although seemingly collected, spent equally as much effort lowering the noticeable tent below his pants.

as soon as the movie ended though, you’re met with another onslaught of problems: rin’s questions and your positively soiled shorts.

“oh my gosh i totally forgot i have a meeting tomorrow at 8am” you scramble to make a believable excuse, “can we talk more about the movie on the way to my apartment?”

“actually let me drive you home” a cool voice cuts in, “i have to grab some groceries anyways.”

“...at near midnight?” rin responds in disbelief.

sae insisted though, and you’re left promising to recap the movie the next day with rin as you entered the passenger seat.

when sae returns empty-handed nearly an hour later though, rin could more or less guess your secret. and sae was promptly banned from sitting next to you for future movie nights (not that it kept you apart otherwise).

#sae #sae smut #sae x reader #sae itoshi #itoshi sae #blue lock #bllk #bllk smut #blue lock smut #blue lock imagines #sae itoshi smut #sae itoshi x reader

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yeahiwasintheshit · 2 years

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Saw that movie, X, that came out earlier this year and it’s clear they’re going for that retro 70s exploitation movie vibe, and if that’s the only thing they wanted to do with this movie, than it worked, I guess. Problem is there wasn’t anything else to any of these characters. It was all very surfacy. Nothing deeper about these characters, but since It was only an exploitation movie, then I guess I shouldnt expect more? idk. Now knowing they are planning a whole expanded universe with this character, maybe they’ll do more with the person(s) who survive in those other movies? i suppose, (trying not to spoil anything) but on its own, I didn’t get much of anything out of this. I wasn’t bored, but I wasn’t too invested in who these people are.

And the main actress Mia goth was fine. I think she did an ok job, a little flat and one-notey, but I feel like they were going for that. I just didn’t really buy this character living in that time. Like the main thing for me is they shaved her eyebrows off, and they have a lot of blue eye shadow on her, and it just makes her look comical or homicidal. And they never mention it. Like I was waiting for them to say something like, “ok honey were about to film your porn scene, it’s time to draw on your eyebrows, it’s such a shame you can’t grow them yourself” but like... it’s just never mentioned. All that’s mentioned about her is that she REALLY wants to be a star. It’s literally the year 1979, and we’re to believe that a person who watches TV and the movies in 1979 is so motivated to being a big star that would they would just walk around with no eyebrows? No big celebrity in 1979 was in movies or TV with no eyebrows, and to think she would think not having eyebrows was ok, didnt feel true for her character, in that time setting. It was just so distracting. It just didnt ring true to any of these characters in this time in history that no one would mention it either. Especially since they are about to film a scene in a porn movie with her. Like she wasnt trying to be famous in like some sort of underground horror movie scene, where maybe you can get away with no eyebrows, she wanted to be a star star, and it just made no sense why she would not draw on eyebrows. I was so distracted by that lol

It was shot well enough, and had some interesting scenes, like there was one over head view of when maxine was in the pond with the alligator, (Chekhov’s alligator? Lol) to me that built some tension, but overall, I felt there were no stakes for these people because right at the beginning, in the first few frames of the movie, we see there was a bloodbath at the farm. We don’t know who or what, but we know most if not all of the people we will meet will die, and for me I don’t really like that kind of framing. It deflates tension almost immediately.

There was also a couple really cheesy kills, like the one in the barn. It was so obvious what was going to happen, it made it uninteresting and a little eye rolling (no pun intended) to watch. Tho there was a cool shot, right before that kill, when the camera pans all the way on the floor and we see what’s right in front of the person and we know what is about to happen next. That was great bit of leading the audience, and built some tension, and when that thing happened I really got the willies. Cause I felt it too lol

Other than a couple scenes that were kinda good, I really didn’t get much out of the movie. I didn’t find any of these people likable or worth rooting for. It’s not that they were bad or evil people, it’s just they were pretty one dimensional characters. And even the villains were kinda dumb. Like there was an interesting scene at the beginning when maxine is in the house and old photos on the wall are shown to her, there was something there. I was intrigued to know more, but they didnt really build on that, and when they kinda reveal the villains motivations theyre really muddled and kinda weak. I felt a few times watching “why?” and there was no really interesting reason.

I also didn’t really like how much the “age” of the older couple was used as a device to elicit horror and grossness from the audience. The makeup on the old people was really pretty good but it was clear it was makeup and it made me wonder why are they putting old age makeup on people instead of just hiring old people (later found out it was the whole prequel/ sequel thing, I guess) But they go out of their way to illustrate that the old people are gross, and they are gross for having sexuality, or having sexual feelings and eventhough they do horrible things because of it, the mere fact of their sexuality was presented as being gross, which again was more of a distraction and kinda off putting.

Idk, I think they wanted this movie to be like really cutting edge and cool, but its kinda vapid and empty. Like the idea of an exploitation movie lends itself to being sort of one dimensional and empty. (pile on the kills and boobs and nothing else than all is good? no) but it just never went beyond that. Maybe they will with the other movies, idk, but im not sure i care enough to find out.

#x #mia goth #ti west #yiwits reviews

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manchesterau · 3 years

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my thoughts after reading my policeman: SPOILERSS of course!! (ignore spelling or grammar mistakes) (this is very ramble-y and not as in depth as it could have been sorrryyy lol, if you want specifics send me an ask after reading this)

okay...so i read the book in 3 days....which....im very proud of myself bc it takes me so long to finish books but that’s not why you are reading this.

im not going to lie to you...i liked the book. i love angst, and this had plenty of it and i liked it. if you like books such as: harry potter, six of crows, red queen, red white and royal blue you will not like this book. i know many people found it boring, which yeah i can see that, but i didn't find it boring at all. but mostly because i love boring books but that's beside the point.

the book flowed easily, there isn't a bunch of raunchy sex scenes that ive seen people say it has (i...the things ive read idk what book they even read????) and Tom does has backward views on marriage and what it means to be a wife. but he is not overtly sexist or misogynist or abusive, or subvertly those things either. to be frank he's a scared gay man in the 50s trying to not get caught and thrown in jail. that's literally it. (ill go more into detail on him later). but if you want to read this book i recommend you go in knowing that there will be homophobia (the word queer is used as a slur....3 times or 4 but no more than 5), expect outing, expect not supportive characters, and remember to have some compassion (more on this later).

next i want to go into characters: starting with tom, then Marion, then Patrick, and then the other characters. so if you are planning on reading this book or just dont want to be spoiled them....don't read the next bit.

Tom:

I'm going to get this out of the way.........Tom (who we never get to know outside of the two-point of views we are presented with, and who is being played by Harry) is a police officer in the 50s UK. to be frank when the rumors first went around I was mad like a lot of people were, which is funny because when we got those pictures of harry reading the book before all the speculation we were....happy, that he was reading a book about a gay man. now...I don't care honestly. I could call out the hypocrites (i won't) and honestly I'm hypocritical myself. I use to watch shows like svu (if you were to turn it on right now I wouldn't turn it off) and I enjoyed watching svu. I know and have seen a lot of mutuals, people on my dash enjoy cop shows like b99, or who like actors who have played the character of police before. so it would be hypocritical of me to be mad at him (this is just my single black opinion) and then go and turn on svu (which I don't do anymore).

I'm not saying that no one can be mad, I'm not saying that the anger people have at him playing this role is bad or not needed or valid. all I'm saying is.....is that I don't care. I got angry over this months ago, and all that anger I felt I don't have anymore, and I can't tell you why. Harry is playing an abusive demented husband who traps his wife in a simulation, and then he will play a gay policeman trying not to face persecution..........and that's that. nothing I can say will reach him, he's playing these roles and there is nothing I can do. will I watch them (pirating of course) yes.

anyways let's get back to tom's character (do not use my opinion to silence other black people I will find you....don't do that shit weirdo): tom is......tom?? like I literally was expecting the worst when I read this because of what other people had to say. but as I'm reading him through the eyes of Marion (his wife) and through the eyes of Patrick (his...true love, fuck the 50s I hate the 50s) one word came to mind constantly: scared. Tom is very scared that he will be found out and his life will be ruined. His family knows about him, which is why I think his father (more on him later) pushed him to be in the national service (where he was a cook, which disappointed him). you don't realize his family knows and then his sister says something and then you go 'wait....THEY KNEW???' and then you will go 'oh so that's why-'

tom does have old fashion views that you would expect of any man at that time (gay or not it's the 50s and gay men are still capable of saying sexist shit). when asked by Patrick if women should still work after having a kid he said no it's the men's job to provide, Marion said she would like to keep working, he said no when they do have a baby (they literally never did, and idk why he thought he could be intimate with her for that long to produce a baby lol). that's....the most sexist thing he said in the whole book (there maybe some small things im forgetting but nothing that really stood out). that's it. I know it's not small and that was a legitimate issue in the 50s but yeah. Just in case you were apprehensive about Tom's character being a raging woman-hater, no,....he just wasn't a true feminist yet (???? I don't know that's like..the most this book says about an issue women were facing at this time). It's still bad what he said (you'll see how Marion justifies it in the book and both Patrick and her don't agree and try and challenge him on his view).

i dont want to go too in depth but it is very obvious from the beginning he has no and i mean ZEROOOO interest in her at all (you can tell when it hits him that he needs a wife and he starts to act a littleee different but it's not romantic at alll).

i feel like my review on tom is shit but like!! we don't really get to know him without bias from Patrick and Marion. I think Harry will play a wonderful Tom (even tho he doesn't not fit the description for Tom...at all....like at alllll).

To summarize Tom: very scared gay man from the 50s who is trying to do everything he can to not be found out. his family knows, even he knew at a young age, and yes he does quit being a police officer but it doesn't happen as soon as id like but then again he wasn't one for that long if you pay attention to the years.

Marion:

😑

i just...if yall could see the notes i made on her.....

To summarize Marion: SHE IS LIVING IN LALA LAND, TOM LITERALLY SHOWS HER NO ROMANTIC INTEREST AT ALLL, AND WHEN SHE METS PATRICK FOR THE FIRST TIME SHE FREAKING NOTICES THAT HE'S ALL BLUSH-Y AND SHIT LIKE...GIRL.....

this is a note i wrote that sums up her and tom's relationship (which is more like friends then anything romantic i mean god their honeymoon was horrible and he proposed to her....nvm 😑)

listen...i can't lie and say i didn't feel sorry for her up until the end when she (spoilers: she outs patrick to his employer which ends up with him getting arrested). after that...ive never hated a character more in my fucking LIFEEEE like oh my god i was pissed

all she does is have fantasies about him being romantic with her (holding hands, hugging, etc) and none of them come true...BECAUSE HES GAYYYYYY i really....the author could have done a better job because there were so many damn red flags.

she's fucking annoying and whiny and yeah it sucked to be a woman in the 50s but you literally outed someone your husband was in love with and thought that you could just go back to being married like he's not devastated and instead of telling what you did you stayed unhappy and made your husband thing that at any point they were coming for him too.......*****

Patrick:

PATRICKKKKK

Patrick and tom deserved a fighting fucking chance i hate the fuck 50s fuck you 50s!!!! I absolutely LOVEDDD his pov and seeing Tom through his pov like it was just so damn refreshing seeing the world through his eyes and how he navigates his queerness in the society they live in. (the dichotomy between a proud gay man and a scared maybe proud but fear overrules that (talking about Tom here) gay man).

There was a lot more to say on how gay men were being persecuted at this time than how women were treated in this particular book. There were some little things here and there about what was expected of Marion as a wife and of a girl/woman at that time but it wasn't the focus.

I loved seeing the way Patrick navigated through his world of art and creativity. And how Tom seemed to fit right in with him.

I hate the things the author made Patrick go through (outed, sent to prison, stripped of his job, and later on in the present day he has had 2 strokes in his 70s). it felt a bit much but it's not too distracting (Patricks pov takes place in the past as he writes in his journal).

Patrick and Julia (more on her later) are my two favorites in the whole book (Tom is third bc he's a very multi-facted character, Marion is not even on the list) and I wish we got a lot more of Patrick's pov.

Other characters!! (speed round bc this is wayyy too long):

Syvlie (Tom's sister): SYVLIEEE IM MAD AT YOUU I WAS ROOTING FOR YOU WHYY WHYYY

Julia: JULIAAAAA QUEEENNN (you'll see why i love her at the end)

Tom's parents: his father is abusive point-blank. or at least i think he's abusive (verbally). as im writing this i am now realizing that the way Tom's mom reacts to him (sometimes crying) is bc they knew he was gay omg wow.

tom's dad is very much a man's man guy?? Picture a sexist man from the 50s....now picture him with a gay son.....yeah, I'm not surprised Tom went into national service then to the police force. you can tell he didn't want anyone to find out about Tom so he pushed him to do what he thought best and Tom went with it, scared.

overall: please do not go into this book expected things to be all flowers and rainbows...this is a book about two gay men in the 50s yall.....

there is something to be said about the tragedy that is in a lot of queer stories, I'm more interested in how white these stories are (that's a rant for another time). but I don't mind my policeman, and i think stories like this should be told. because this actually happened (here is a link to em forster's story where the author takes inspiration from, he really had an affair with a policeman!!! who had a wife!!!).

the ending is bittersweet, and i couldn't help but curse for what could have been. Marion could have not outed Patrick (which she instantly regretted), she could have gotten a divorce (she even contemplated it), they could have been more secretive, Julia could have not said what she said. I think Patrick and Tom were sadly doomed from the start, I just wish they had more time together because I loved seeing their love (the little glimpse we got) bloom into something bigger than them.

thank you for reading!! here are random screenshots of my notes as i read this lol enjoy!!

can’t*

#*#my policeman #godd this book...i cant wait for the movie #mp

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estella-and-co · 3 years

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Here I go with the elaborate headcanons again

In 101 dalmatians Horace and Jasper's last name is Badun but I'm like 70% sure that was just a dumb pun name. Like 'oh they're bad guys so Bad plus uhhhh un"

I'd like to think if their(?) last name ever gets mentioned in the Cruella universe it would be something more real sounding and less ugly. I was thinking Beaudin or Beaudoin, which mean 'joyful' and 'bold friend' respectively. They would sound much nicer than "buh dun" ("bow-dahn" or "bow-dwahn")

Also they look similar enough to the original plus Beau is the masculine form of beautiful in French.

So since they aren't biological brothers, why do they have the same last name? And why is it French? Welcome to my version of Jasper's (and some of Horace's) back story.

I gotta tell you all of this just kinda came to me I didn't put too much thought into it but I kinda love it

So Jasper is the child of a British soldier and a woman from north-northwestern France who met at the end of world war 2. When the war was over and just a few days before he was about to be sent back to England, the soldier met Jasper's mother and he fell madly in love with her and decided to stay with her in France.

When they got married, he took her last name - Beaudin - so there wouldn't be records of him so the army wouldn't go looking for him. They built a life together and about 7 years later they had Jasper.

When Jasper was really young (3-5 years old) his father wanted them to go on a trip back to England to see his family again. And then they were planning on moving to Bretagne, where J's mother is from, to raise their family there.

On the way to London their train gets in an accident. At the time Jasper, being a curious and independent little boy, had wandered off to a different section of the train than his parents which was less affected by the crash and that's how he survived while they didn't.

He's found in the wreckage and at one point he has to ID his parent's bodies which is super traumatic :(

(If they had made it to find his grandparents they would have discovered that 1 they had been living on the street for years bc they had been kicked out if their home due to financial problems and 2 they had assumed J's dad was dead so one of the parents committed suicide in their grief)

(I had an alternative version where they find the grandparents but the dad is super racist and he attacks Jasper's parents in a rage over their interracial marriage. He also has some friends who share his views so J's parents are outnumbered and his mom tells him to run. But that might be a little too dark and/or overdramatic)

Jasper is eventually taken to the orphanage where he's assigned to bunk with Horace.

Horace had been in the system his entire life, but for a couple years he lived with a foster family. The mother was very kind and treated him like her own, but when she died, her husband decided he didn't want and couldn't take care of the foster children, so Horace was sent back.

Horace and Jasper got closer over the years they spent together in the orphanage. Their life there wasn't exactly the easiest and nicest experience, to say the very least, but they had each other to lean on. They learned to steal because they often wouldn't get fed enough or sometimes at all. They figured out the best way and time to sneak into the kitchen and how to best distract any staff they might encounter.

When they're around 12 years old they decide they're over this, and they think they'll be able to live on their own, as long as they stick together. So one night they make their escape. They meet Estella around two months later.

As the years went on, Jasper forgot any French he ever knew (except sometimes in his dreams he could still hear his mother calling him 'mon ange'.)

(for this next part I couldn't figure out a good scenario where they would need to use their real names so idk just go with it lol)

When they're around 15, Wink gets sick and, as much as they try to avoid it, eventually they have to take him to the vet.

Horace is worried sick for his little dog son. He's a nervous wreck the whole walk over to the vet, focusing all of his attention on comforting and checking on Wink, who was also a wreck, while Jasper figures out directions and everything.

After waiting for what felt like an eternity (but was probably only 25 minutes) they could finally check in.

"Name?' the receptionist asked.

"I'm Horace, and this here's my dog Wink. He's been very sick, ya see, he's hardly been eating an-"

He was a bundle of anxiety, talking so fast he barely registered the words coming from his own mouth.

"Now just hold on a minute; I can't do anything to help you out here. And what's the last name?"

"Uh,,,"

Horace had never really had to think about that. He'd never really had a last name, at least not one that he knew of. He didn't even know the last name of that kind woman who had been like a mother to him all those years ago. He had always just been Horace.

"Last name's Beaudin, ma'am." Jasper piped up from beside him. "I'm his brother."

Horace looked over at him, slightly bewildered. He guessed they had always been like brothers, but he's never really thought of it in those terms before. It felt nice to have someone be 'officially' called his family. It felt really nice.

Jasper smiled back at him. He'd always been there for him, and he always would be.

"I can uh, finish with the paperwork and stuff." Jasper said, "You and Wink just go sit down."

From then on, they were the Beaudin brothers. Little did they know then, that one day their story would be twisted and told alongside that of the evil Cruella, but no matter what the storytellers got wrong, they always got that part right. That they were brothers.

#ficlet #jasper #horace #head canon #headcanon #cruella #cruella 2021 #jasper badun #horace badun #fanfiction #?

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g0ldengubler · 3 years

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chapter 6~life is a “high” way

(*i do not own this gif*)

A/N: this chapter is honestly one of personal favs because we get to see more of spencer feeling more confident in himself in a way while still being him and it’s just aaaaa :’) tomorrow you will get chapter 7 but then after that, expect chapters to come out a bit slower, including requests (which i am working on currently and thank you so much for sending them my way!). lots of my focus needs to be on my personal life but writing helps me get through all of that hell, so i’m in a very wishy washy position lol. thank you so much for the love on nauseous i love uuuuuu

Category: fluff w smut at the end

CW: road head, d/s dynamic, daddy kink

Word Count: 3282

before you read | last chapter | next chapter (coming soon!*)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Spencer parks in front of your apartment building and stays in his seat as you get out. You both had decided that packing up right away and not going to lunch was better. That way, you can learn more about each other on the way there. You couldn't wait to get inside that smarty-pants brain of his and find out what's really going on in there.

You shut the car door and start walking, but stop when you don't hear his footsteps behind you. When you walk back to the car, you see Spencer sticking his battery in the cigarette lighter to charge.

"You're more than welcome to come in, y'know." You chuckled.

Spencer looks up at you, licking his lips as he moves some of his hair behind his ear. "It's ok, I don't want to bother."

"You won't be a bother. I've been to yours, now you can come into mine."

"Oh, so that's how that works huh? You have to go into the guys apartment before the guy goes to yours?" Spencer said sarcastically.

"You know what I mean!" You pull open the car and grab his hand, "C'mon, Spence. You'll be fine!"

He giggles under his breath and comes out of the car. After locking it, the two of you head inside and up the elevator to the 4th floor. Once at your door, you unlock it and open up to 4 paws jumping onto you. You hear Spencer gasp in surprise and giggle at his reaction, making it seem like you were giggling at your two buddies. Sitting on your old couch was your next door neighbor, Seth, who was watching Pose on the tv.

"Thank you again for watching the boys while I was gone. I really owe you big time for doing this." you say as you get up from the floor.

Seth gets off of the couch and walks up to you to give you a hug. "Anytime! If anything, they can stay at my place when you go on a case-" He stops and looks over at Spencer, standing awkwardly by the door still and letting the dogs sniff him, "Although, it seems like this new case was a success."

"Shut up, Seth!" You giggle, lightly slapping him on the arm. Realizing you forgot your manners, you quickly try to take it back. "Seth, meet Dr.Spencer Reid. Doc, meet my neighbor, Seth."

Seth reached his hand out to shake, but Spencer politely denies. "Sorry, I-I don't shake hands. It's actually been proven that it's safer to kiss." You catch Seth's eyes looking him up and down. "Seth stop teasing him like that!" You laugh. Spencer wasn't into guys, but somehow Seth looking at him made you a little jealous. You're not even dating the man, y/n shut up, you think to yourself.

"You and I will talk later." He says.

"Oh, Spence! These are my babies. The scottie is Benedict and the husky is Draco."

The room went silent for a moment, Spencer trying to hold in a chuckle. "Yes, I did name them after Benedict Cumberbatch and Draco Malfoy. I've had them picked out since I was a teenager, don't judge."

"Oh c'mon hun," said Seth, "it's adorable that you named them the way you did."

"It is," Spencer spoke, "I didn't depict you as a nerd."

"Oh my god, you kidding? She's probably the biggest nerd I've ever met with all her Sherlock and other crime shows, Harry Potter, Doctor Wh-"

"Ok, I think he gets it Seth!" You cut him off. That was enough embarrassment for today.

"I will say, Benedict or Tom Felton could always come my way."

You slap him on the arm again laughing. You look back at Spencer, who was awkwardly chuckling along with. You then announce that you were going to get in the shower. "Seth, can you take them for a few more nights? We're going up to my dad's cabin back home for the weekend. Also, when I get out and do my makeup, you promised me that you would tell me how your date went last night with 'Mr.Perfect' as you said it."

"Bitch I have ALLLLLL the tea that I'm not missing on spilling!"

"Good. Now you two get along. And Spence," He looks up at you, his hazel eyes looking into you...

"Don't miss me too much, hm?"

Then you walked into your bathroom, trying to wrap your brain on the fact that you just said that to him.

~Spencer's POV~ I can't believe she said that.

She left me here a little turned on. I could start feeling my pants getting tight and had to put my bag over myself as I sat on the couch so then I wouldn't embarrass myself in front of Seth. I looked around her apartment to distract myself of thoughts of being in the shower with her. She had a very interesting aesthetic. Walls white with old picture frames that had beautifully taken old photos in them. The lamps that were in the living room looked like they were from the 70's, old gold coating chipped off at some parts of the stand. While there was a vintage look to her place, it was also very modern at the same time, a minimalistic look took over her kitchen. She had a fake vine hanging from the wall behind her tv, some of it covering her maroon record player. In some ways, our aesthetics were similar. If she had a bookcase in here, I'd feel like I was at my place.

Seth and I began to get to know each other. I came to find out that Seth worked as a bartender at a club, and he enjoyed taking photos for his social media. "I would love to be a photographer," he said, "but right now it's just a hobby that I do mostly during the colder months." He says cold, cloudy days (especially if it's raining) were the best times to take photos, in his opinion.

"So," he says, "you work with y/n at the BAU?"

"Yeah, we've really become good friends in the past 9 days. It's like we've known each other for years. Plus, she's great out on the field. She's definitely someone myself and the rest of the team will never take for granted."

"Thank god," Seth said as I heard the water turn off, "She told me that it was her dream to be a part of the BAU. She would never stop talking about it when she was in college."

"Hm, she never mentioned that to me."

"Well, let her tell you on your way to the cabin. She'll love it."

After a little bit more conversation, y/n came back to the living room. Her hair was damp, not fully wet but not dry either. She had thrown on a white turtle neck shirt with a brown sweater vest over it. She matched it with darker brown corduroy pants, cuffing the bottoms. In her hands was what looked like to be her makeup bag. She sat down in front of the mirror that was in the corner on the left side of the tv (when you look at the tv), beginning the process.

Seth and y/n talk about his date from last night and got pretty detailed about it. He talked about how the man took him to a gay bar that was a few blocks from here, and how they danced and drank the night away. "Oh and then get this," says Seth, "we're pretty drunk at this point, right? Well at one point, the local queen that performed came up to me and tried to flirt and shit, thinking she was all that and a bag of lashes, and he saw how uncomfortable I was and stood up for me. And let me tell you, he was REA-DY to throw hands!"

"Stooooop he's literally a keeper!" y/n says.

Once she was done with her makeup, she gets up and goes back to her room, coming back out with her luggage. She goes over to the door to grab a pair of Vans and comes back to tell Seth and her children goodbye.

"I'll be back in a few days. Thanks again, Seth. I really-"

"Owe me one, I know I know!" Seth cuts her off, "Now go have some fun and relax, you need to after working so damn hard for this job!" He turns to me and waves. "And it was very nice meeting you, Doctor."

"It was nice to meet you, too! But please, you can just call me Spencer."

Seth smiles as we walk out the door. What this trip will bring? For once, I'm letting fate take the lead instead of science.

~Y'N's POV~ It had been about a few hours of being on the road. At this point, you were somewhere in Pennsylvania, but not sure if you were close enough to Philly to grab a cheesesteak. You think back to the start of the drive. You suggested that you'd be the dj because your library on spotify had a full range of genres with some songs you had no clue were in there. "It'd be a fun little journey!" You told Spencer. And that it was, a journey.

You ended up driving right by a dispensary before even leaving DC. Garcia told you that that's where she gets her stuff, but knowing that bringing a lot of weed across the country wouldn't be a fun trip, you two decided to go with the original plan and just wait till you get to Michigan.

You could tell Spencer was getting a kick out of your music library. While majority of the songs he didn't know, he was still being goofy and jamming out along with you, trying to match the same energy you were having. The songs that talked about sex, drugs, and/or alcohol surprised him every time, his jaw dropping or his eyes bulging out of his head as he listened to the lyrics. You couldn't help yourself but laugh at his reactions, which would make him laugh along with you.

You two weren't alone, however. You were pretty much sucking down on the carts you still had, although you both made a deal that whoever was driving could only get a little high if they wanted to, drinking plenty of water and eating snacks to sober you up a bit if needed.

Driving through Pennsylvania, you look out the window and onto the scenery around you. You weren't paying attention, however, because you couldn't stop the dirty thoughts that intruded your mind. You couldn't help to think about giving him head, since you hadn't done it yet because both times he gave you all the pleasure. You couldn't wait to get to the cabin and go straight to your knees for him. Suddenly, you tried to get them out of your head. 'You're getting way too excited, y/n. STOP IT!' you thought to yourself.

You decided to just feel everything around you, taking a few more hits from your pen before taking it in. Nineteen by Movements was playing; it was like you could feel the song itself and everything about it as you looked up at the very tall street lamps passing by. Nothing felt better than this moment. Just you and Spencer out on the open road. It felt like nothing could stop you two. You felt free, but you also felt safe and complete, something you haven't felt in a long time.

At one point, you couldn't take it anymore. It was 2:30am and Spencer was still driving. He told you to get some sleep but you weren't sleepy or tired at all. You tried to feel free but when you did, you thought of Spencer, which led to dirty thoughts. It was like you couldn't escape it, and every time the thoughts came, you couldn't help but secretly rub your thighs together for some kind of friction.

As you tried to get the thoughts out of your head, you look over to see a nice little surprise. The passing lights outside helping you see, you noticed the bulge in Spencer's pants. How in the hell would he be getting hard now of all times? Were dirty thoughts intruding his mind, too? Seeing that made you even more wet than you already were. This was your chance.

You look out to the open road in front of you, and gently graced your fingers across his bulge. You look out the corner of your eye...nothing. Not even a flinch. 'Playing hard to get, hm?' You thought to yourself. So you did it again, which made him shift in his seat a little, still pretending he didn't notice anything. Finally, with some kind of courage that you never knew you had, you grabbed his cock through his pants and slowly started to stroke it. His eyes came out of his head, letting out a small gasp.

"You know I'm driving, right?" He asked, "We could crash if I'm paying attention more to this and not on the road."

You give him a smirk, "It's almost 3am," you begin to say, but then you notice that you're the only car on the road, "and no one else is on the road right now."

You start to undo his belt with your one hand. "You pleasured me twice already," you continue, your hand successfully undoing the belt and undoing the zipper on his pants, reaching inside to pull out his already, fully hard cock, "I need to show my thanks somehow, don't I?"

Spencer shifts in his seat, keeping his eyes out on the road. You were kind of hoping he was looking for somewhere to pull over, but you wouldn't mind doing it as he drove. "You...you already did...b-by inviting me to your dad's cabin."

You stopped stroking and he almost let out a whimper. "I saw that bulge in your pants just a few minutes ago, are you suuuurree you don't want to...daddy?"

Just hearing the word 'daddy' made him grab your hair tightly. You smiled as you shifted your position in your seat to go down on him. When you were ready, Spencer stopped at a red light and pulled your face close to his, lips almost ghosting each other.

"You better make daddy feel good then, since you're being such a fucking brat right now." He whispered as you continued to slowly stroke him again.

You couldn't even react to what he said because once the light turned green, he guided your head down to his cock before letting the tightness on your head go and letting his hand rest on top. You decided to egg on your bratty-ness by teasing the tip, giving him kitty licks at first and then slowly just running your tongue in it, licking up the pre cum.

Spencer tightens his grip again, making you whimper. "I'm not sure doing that is a good idea, angel. Do you want to get punished once we're there?"

You shook your head no, but the thought of him punishing you made you feel yourself drip between your thighs.

Spencer moves his grip from your hair and slaps your ass with a huge SMACK, which made you moan loudly. "You have to use your words, angel. Unless you want to be a little slut tonight."

You look up at him to see his eyes were still on the road. You smirk as you pump him a few times before taking his head in your mouth. You bob up and down slowly, hearing him grunt and curse under his breath. You step it up by going down a little lower, each time going back up and then going lower until you had all of him in your mouth. You stayed like that for a few moments, gagging on it.

"Oh fuuuck that's it...that's it baby, take my cock in your mouth, just like that." He says before pulling you off to let you breathe. He's quiet for a moment before he says, "Now I'm going to guide you, angel. You're gonna make daddy feel more good than he already was, got it?"

"Yes, daddy." you answer, knowing that he wanted to hear you say again.

He pushes your head back on his cock, moving you head faster than before. He couldn't get enough it, making you gag every so often and pulling you back up. Spencer's cock twitched in your mouth and you knew he was close. He controls your head faster, his rhythm getting sloppy.

"You want me to cum in that pretty mouth of yours, angel? You want daddy's cum?" He growled, trying not to thrust into your mouth as he continues to drive.

"Mhmm!" You moan, which almost made him go over the edge.

"Keep doing that for daddy, moan for me. God, I bet you just love having my cock in your mouth, but I'm sure you're just desperate for my cum."

You moan again. That you were. You wanted his cum so bad in your mouth so you could taste him; taste how good you made him feel.

"Don't...fuck...don't stop doing that, angel...that's it...fuck I'm gonna cum..."

And with that, you feel his cum shoot inside your mouth, letting out moans and cursing. You slowly continued to suck him, getting every last drop. When you did, you move up to face Spencer as he pulled over, showing his cum in your mouth at first and then closing your mouth to swallow and open back up to show him it was gone. The look in his eyes told you that that was the hottest thing he's ever seen.

Spencer pulls you in surprisingly and attacks your lips with his, as if he was hungry for them. He was almost eating your face but you didn't care, you kissed him back and let your tongues play with one another. You both pull away after a bit and he just looks into your eyes. You look into his hazel eyes and felt complete.

"Now, will you stop being a brat and get some sleep?" He asks.

You giggle as you quickly look at the time in the car radio. "It's 3:15," you said, "it's my turn to drive."

"But now you're all tired from pleasing daddy," he jokes, "so you get some sleep, and I'll drive. I really don't mind it. Honest."

"Are you sure?"

Spencer nods his head. You decided to give in and get comfy in your seat.

"Goodnight, Spence." You say as you move the top part of the seat all the way back. You grabbed your traveling pillow and placed it on top of your right arm, laying your head as you turned your body to face away from him.

"Goodnight, angel."

#spencer reid smut #spencer reid #spencer reid fanfiction #spencer x reader #spencer reid x reader #criminal minds #criminal minds smut #criminal minds fanfiction #criminal minds fan fiction #criminal minds fic #matthew gray gubler smut #matthew gray gubler #mgg

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calpalsworld · 3 years

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Got A LOT of asks about Wu and Garmadon and their shapeshifting in Ninjago Respun so heres a BIG answer instead

[spoilers for canon Ninjago lore, and minor spoilers for Respun lore since I’ll gradually explain this all in canon anyway. Only read this if you are DYING to know I guess?] [Whenever I say “we’ll talk about that later” that basically means I won’t talk about that further even if you ask, sorry D: Gotta wait for the comic to address that.] CONTEXT: The First Spinjitzu Master was SOOO strong. He was NOT supposed to exist, not just because of the eternal war between Oni and Dragon, but because sex between the two does NOT usually yield any Baby?! (Plus some other reasons ill talk about later). So like. Woaaah wtf? So.... that one baby? The First Spinjitzu Master? Yeah, he is a god! All the powers that dragons and oni have? He has them, and more.

SOME FIRST SPINJITZU MASTER DETAILS:

Dragons usually only have titles for names, so “First Spinjitzu Master” is literally his name.

He is immortal.

Oni are shapeshifters with no defined form. Dragons are shapeshifters too, but to a lesser extent (we’ll talk about that later). So the First Spinjitzu Master is a shapeshifter too. And so, humans are literally the fursona of the FSM.

He can create shit like its no big deal. He made the land, the plants, the animals, the people, the elements -- he made *almost* EVERYTHING in the realm of Ninjago (we’ll talk about that later).

Some aspects of Ninjago’s many cultures came from the First Spinjitzu Master -- from Oni and Dragon -- but other parts developed independently. In the Oni-Dragon language, “he” is a pronoun referring to Oni, and “she” is a pronoun referring to Dragons. There are other things too but that would take A LONG TIME to talk about... moving on...

HISTORY OF WU AND GARMADON’S SHAPESHIFTING AND ONI-DRAGON HERITAGE BIRTH | YEAR 0: So, the immortal Oni-Dragon named the First Spinjitzu Master, aka: God, decided to create people for his cool awesome realm. He wanted humans to be different from himself, but he also wanted a couple people who were just like him that could continue his legacy. He wanted people who could forever defend what he created. So he just mpregged himself and made two kids! Lying: He summoned them into existence, no pregnancy involved, sorry. Cries. The first he created was named Garmadon (named by himself), and the second he created was named Wu (named by his dad like a loser HAHA). Garmadon was born (created) in late winter, and Wu was born (created) in early summer. Wu and Garmadon are biologically identical to their father, half Oni, half Dragon, and immortal. But they are not as powerful as him. Beings equally strong as himself would be impossible for the FSM to create. His sons don’t have the same creation powers as him, but they have the same Oni and Dragon abilities. When Wu was born (created), Garmadon instantly chose to look almost identical to Wu. He previously had a different form that the First Spinjitzu Master designed for him, but fuck that (we call this becoming the realm of Ninjago’s first transgender person). At birth they looked and acted like they were around 3 years old. CHILDHOOD | YEARS 0-30: Wu and Garmadon’s physical forms are a conscious decision, but are also affected by their subconscious mental states. This caused them to age like MOSTLY like a normal child would... just a BIT slower. They also interacted mostly with people the same age as them, and chose to age like they did (we’ll talk more about this later). Garmadon got bit by the Great Devourer when he was 7. His eyes would look like he is really high sometimes (glow red) because of the curse, unrelated to shapeshifting. He also has a scar on his arm from the bite and the venom. It is usually very hard to scar an Oni/Dragon, but it was a powerful, long-term, magical wound. The bite caused him to become soooooooo angry and evil that he made up a Oni-persona because Onis look evil and cool. The two of them were always distracted by exploring the world, rather than questioning who they were. They just knew their father was from “outside the realm” and “half oni, half dragon.” They knew he and they could live forever, while others couldn’t, and knew they could shapeshift, while others couldn’t. But they never questioned him further, like.... they didn’t really care lol. Around 30 they looked/acted like they were around 15 years old (around 30 is when they met Aspheera btw). TEENAGE YEARS/YOUNG ADULTHOOD | YEARS 30-70: More adventuring and not caring about who they are. On one adventure, Wu got “crucified” by a village of people, Breaking-Wheel-Style on a Dharmachakra, while Garmadon watched and laughed. Eventually Wu and Garmadon met this woman on their adventures. [[Ninjago spoilers, cough cough --mystaké, --cough cough]]. She cryptically explained a few things: Dragon and Oni were at war in the past, Dragons create, Oni destroy, and currently the two species are dispersed across the realms. Wu and Garmadon’s father got mad at this lady for spilling all these beans, so she shut up about the dragon and oni shit, but still guided them in other ways for many many many many many many many many years to come. Around age 60, Wu and Garmadon looked about 30 years old. Their father passed on when they were 60, and the brothers began to diverge in the way they physically looked. Prior to this, they were near identical and relatively normal looking. My dearest apologies to those of you who love sexy 30 year old sensei Wu, buuuttttttttt, over the next decade, Wu became eldercore and wisdompilled as fuck. Meanwhile, Garmadon became a ripped 7′0 hottie (smh), who SLOWLY got older over centuries, paralleling Misako’s age. We’ll talk about Misako later. CENTURIES GO BY | YEARS 70-450: Btw, despite being really hard to scar, Wu got scars on his arms from another “crucifixion” at some point. (we’ll talk more about this later). .......More stuff happens.... not related to onis or dragons shapeshifting...... At age 450: -- oh crap GARMADON YOURE EVIL AF *banishes him*. We’ll obviously talk a LOT more about the banishment event later, ofc. Garmadon gets #pissed and so #fuck #anger #kill that he turns into his four-armed oni-persona. Wu and Garmadon know dragons. Wu hid the four golden weapons so Garmadon could never get them, and had dragons guard them. He is actually pretty tight with these dragons. They’re his friends. They were friends with Garmadon too. In the “Pilot”, “Weapons of Destiny”, Wu could’ve stopped these dragons from fighting the Ninja, but he wanted to test his students lmao. As for Oni, Wu and Garmadon (believe they) have never met a full-Oni. UP TO THE CURRENT DAY | YEAR 610. Most of Ninjago’s people know nothing about Oni and Dragons. Oni and Dragons are just mythological, often dismissed as fake. They don’t know Wu, Garmadon, and the First Spinjitzu Master are related to Oni and Dragon at all. Their origin doesn’t need explanation to most citizens. People just think, “Oh, The FSM, Master Wu, and Lord Garmadon? You mean God, Jesus, and Evil Jesus?” (Of course, the “Jesus” part is COMPLETELY non-diegetic, and they don’t actually call them that. They don’t know wtf Jesus is). I could go off about religion in Ninjago, but don’t get me started lol XD So, in conclusion, we got two immortal half-dragon-half-oni idiots that are worshipped by the average citizen. Wu is purposefully eldercore, and Garmadon is purposefully a ripped 7′0 oni-persona hottie. Post that explains rules of oni-dragon shapeshifting. That’s the lore at the moment. Any thoughts? Criticisms? Any other questions?

#sorry for inconsistent capitalization #deleting all asks on this topic now #this is p much everything i am ok with revealing about wu and garm ooc #but if anything is confusing feel free to ask and i might clarify

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xcziel · 3 years

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get to know me

tagged by @vishcount (thank you!!) and i'll follow her format bc making two posts seems a little much - i'm not that interesting!!

(hilariously, this post shows up as blocked for me bc of the tag 'joker' which? tumblr?????)

Part I

name: i'm an internet old, so i never use my real name online, mainly because it's spelled in a very unique way (thanks mom & dad) - i mean like, if you googled it you could find my home address in a few seconds kind of unique - but also, though i do enjoy the spelling, i actually don't like it very much when it's said out loud? (is it weird that my name written down is 'me', but my name aloud has never felt like 'me'?) always wanted a nickname but never acquired one :/

at any rate, i've had the username xcziel forever and i go by that 😊 (pronounced ex-SEE-zee-el, similar to etc. or ex-SET-er-ah! thanks @xia-xueyi for pointing out that it can be confusing to guess!)

rest behind a cut because it got long!

pronouns: she/her

star sign: i don't ... really *do* astrology? but technically saggitarius

height: 5'4" (162.5cm for the intl folks)

time: 5:43pm but these thing take me forever to type out so ... ???

birthday: playing the 'internet old' card again .. but it floats around american Thanksgiving depending on the year

nationality: american

fave bands/groups/solo artists: lumping these together because i just .. don't really do music much anymore. if you had asked me this back in my 20s i'm sure i would have had all kinds of opinions and things to share, but these days i actually mostly prefer to listen music from when i was a kid. part of it is also that as an old, i prefer to buy my music, even digitally, and i don't really use spotify - which does so much to enable diverse music exploration i admit! but i mostly have earplugs in all the time and music does not work for me as background noise, so...

so i guess my answer would be 70s disco and classic rock and 80s new wave artists? i've never liked any artist's entire discography and prefer greatest hits-type compilations, but i guess duran duran and def leppard and depeche mode would be considered formative? i love new order but specifically late 80s new order, NOT joy division. the only concert t-shirt i've ever worn was the cult? i loved sonic temple but i can't listen to most of it anymore though i still adore love removal machine. i think maybe if you get old enough, for some of us there's TOO MUCH good music and we can't pare it down anymore

song stuck in your head: jamiroquai's canned heat

last movie you watched: re: the above, i re-watched center stage, the 2000 one with zoe saldana and the mandy moore soundtrack, bc it's a happy comfort movie and i just got a digital version

last show you binged: i can't really "binge" very often bc after a couple of hours i need a break, so i guess i'd say the tgcf donghua on netflix since it was short enough to get through all in one go

when you created your blog: in 2012 i stopped lurking so i could post about the avengers movie

the last thing you googled: 5'4" in cm? lol before that it was chinese wrapped street food

other blogs: everything is here! i discovered i compartmentalize about as well as i tag reliably (😓) but i do have several automated ao3feed-tag style sideblogs. and i did, very briefly, have a *winces* hockey sideblog too

why i chose my url: ooh i know i've done this before, sorry if it's repetitive, basically it was the username i picked back when my family first got aol: short, unique combo of letters - 14-year-old me really thought about it! and then it wouldn't let me use anything other than my name. thirty-some-odd years later, trying to come up with a livejournal username that wasn't already taken and getting fed up, i plugged it in and went: good enough!

how many people are you following: like 760-something last i checked? although many, many, many of them are deactivated

how many followers do you have: idk i don't like looking at that stuff, but way fewer than i am following

average hours of sleep: it varies too much day by day, my sleep schedule is too wonky, i have no idea what the average would be

lucky numbers: 7? cliché i know, and again not really buying into it, but somewhere in my hindbrain i like it that my first, middle, and last names all have seven letters

instruments: none. i like singing

what i'm currently wearing: giant black t-shirt and baggy black drawstring shorts, standard sitting around the house gear

dream job: don't have one. if i did it would give me something to be working towards *sigh* this is how you end up in retail for decades, kids! but also, to quote a random post i saw in true tumblr fashion "i simply do not dream of labor"

dream trip: covered this one before but: back to the uk and some railway daytrips, or a really fancy northern cruise, atlantic/pacific either one

fave food: uhhh, don't really have a favorite but i'm almost always in the mood for pizza

top three fictional universe you'd like to live in: none really, if i had to still be me..maybe some kind of actually utopian future? but the pandemic has confirmed for me that i do NOT like living in interesting times, so most fictional story universes are RIGHT out. my favorites to read about like discworld or diana wynne jones' worlds would be way to chaotic for my comfort. possibly diane duane's young wizards universe would be safe enough to be okay?

Part II

last song: watching center stage made me think of my dance playlist so sunrise by simply red

last movielast stream: i don't watch streams or youtube often, so it was the same as you, vish! liu chang's birthday stream was SO enjoyable i screenrecorded the entire thing just so i could play it back (and maybe gif sometime if i ever get the drive to actually do it)

currently reading: well i just finished the translated quan qiu gao kao or global university entrance exam novel, which was sparked purely from catching a single rec post here on tumblr and basically just *falling* into this 166 chapter epic that is *amazing* and not coming up for air until i got to the end, which is typical novel-reading behavior for me (yes i was the kid who read through lunch period and got hassled by people who kept pestering me with "what're you reading" questions and yes i realize probably a lot of you on tumblr were too) plus, the new murderbot novel is out tomorrow!!!!! so that'll be where i end up next!

currently watching: the entire dmbj verse (that i can get my hands on) but ... sporadically and stopping at random different parts because the thing is ... this type of show is not really the kind i enjoy so much? so since it's more for "research" and learning character arcs (and let's be honest: shots of liu sang), etc. it's easy to get distracted by other stuff. i'm also watching the sleuth of the ming dynasty, mr queen, bromance, the expanse, re-watching farscape and stargate sg-1, just finished the falcon and the winter soldier, and then anytime something new and short gets introduced it jumps the queue. there are just. so. many. things. to. watch! (now i have to look into anti-fraud league too!? you all are cruel ...)

what is antipoetry to you: i ... don't really think much about poetry? i know what i prefer is usually the more basic rhymed kind like lewis carroll, emily dickinson, poe, coleridge, etc. so i suppose i don't have much use for classifying non-rhyming verse? i can appreciate stuff like rupi kaur which i guess would qualify? or that william carlos williams plums poem? but it doesn't really stick with me the way lyric-like verse does

currently craving: i never know what exactly this is meant to be in reference to ... hmmm, i would love a new high-concept, high production-quality movie like say, pacific rim, to be released, just for that massive, excited energy that comes with something new that hasn't already got tons of disappointing or conflicting history behind it - that would be so fun!!

other than that, right now, i mostly kinda want some fried fish? but that will have to wait until i go to get my second vaccine shot on wednesday since it's on the way there. i'd also like my internal body parts to settle down and fly right but it's been more than a month and they don't seem inclined :(((( maybe once i'm fully vaxxed i'll think about consulting somebody about it

tagging @foxofninetales @xia-xueyi @momosandlemonsoda @memorydragon @thewindsofsong @elvencantation @mylastbraincql @hesayshesgotboyfriend @aurawolfgirl2000 @smaragdine-galaxy and anyone who wants to! but never feel obligated and if you don't get around to it for like half a year that's totally fine, i am still interested!!!

#xcedit #is my only like 'me' tag #tag game #long post #i wanna do one of these with more unusual questions but not like those themed ones ...#tell me if the cut doesn't work i'm still not used to having them on mobile!

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eleanorbloom · 4 years

Text

When You’re Ready Ch. 06

Pairing: Bryce Lahela x f! MC (Eleanor Bloom) x Ethan Ramsey.

Word Count: 4.5k

Warning: SMUT 🍋 🍋 🍋 and cursing.

Summary: Bryce has decided to let go Eleanor because she’s in love with Ethan Ramsey. But a turn in her relationship with the attending might change Bryce’s plans.

A/N: Hello!

I have to tell that a part of this chapter was inspired by the illustration posted here on Tumblr. It’s canon to me that Bryce would flirt with MC pretending he’s a stranger, and not a single soul will change my mind.

Hope you enjoy the chapter, that’s, like, 70% NS*W. You have no idea how much I struggled to write this one 🥵 . He’s so fucking hot and this fucking virus doesn’t let me have booty calls and, well, you know what I mean, the abstinence is killing me, so I have to live vicariously through Eleanor to have some action in my life lol.

Taglist @utterlyinevitable @shanzay44 @choicesficwriterscreations @laiba-the-person @starrystarrytrouble @lahellacute @lucy-268 @aylamreads @binny1985

Let me know if you wanna be added to my taglist!

___________

Chapter 6: Cool.

I like us better when we’re intertwined

The way you touch me got me losin’ my senses

Eleanor woke up the next day with a big smile on her face. She couldn’t remember the last time she woke up that happy, but surely, it’d been months. Enthusiastically, she got up from her bed to start the day. Once she was all cleaned and dressed, she went to the kitchen, where Elijah and Sienna were making breakfast. As she started to have breakfast, her friends bombarded her with questions about her absence the night before. After teasing them with evasive answers, she finally told them what had happened, and that she and Bryce were dating.

Sienna couldn’t resist an over-excited reaction and Elijah looked really happy for both of his friends. For Eleanor, who had been suffering too much because of Ramsey, and for Bryce, because he knew how much he cared for Eleanor, and how much he had been doing to make her happy.

Once the three of them were ready for another day of work, they headed to Edenbrook.

The moment their eyes met in the locker room that morning, there were sparkles just like the night before. Eleanor was feeling a little shy and nervous, as it always happens when a relationship starts, but even if Bryce was a million light-years over the moon, he cared to not make Eleanor feel uncomfortable, pressured, or overwhelmed. Just when Eleanor agreed, he planted a chaste kiss on her lips when he approached her to say hi. Even if she was feeling a little weird, after the kiss she felt relieved, calmed. She still couldn’t understand what power had Bryce over her.

Just as what happened that morning, things started to develop at Eleanor’s pace. At first, Eleanor didn’t feel comfortable enough to display too much affection in public, but as the days went by, she started to not mind that Bryce would steal a kiss from her lips or her cheek when they would bump into each other at the hospital; or that when they were at Donahue’s, Bryce would almost always put an arm around her when they were sitting together. In fact, after a week, she would find herself craving for those kisses or his touch.

One day, Eleanor was at the Nurse Station doing some paperwork, when suddenly someone approached her and said:

“Hey, I’m Bryce.”

Eleanor looked up. He was leaning on the desk with his statuesque figure and his usual flirtatious, megawatt smile.

“Hello, I’m Eleanor.” She answered, trying to look serious.

“Nice to meet you. You work here?”

“Yeah.”

“Since when? I haven’t seen you around”

“Mmm, about a year”

“Really? And how the hell I’ve been missing this angel from heaven?”

Eleanor laughed

“So smooth"—She muttered to herself—"Maybe the devil got you distracted.”

Bryce smiled knowingly.

“How are you, beautiful?”

“Good”—She smiled— “And better now that I see your smile.”

“Seriously?”

Eleanor blushed. She didn’t even think about it for a single moment before speaking from her heart, but she had no regrets. Being able to surprise him with her own feelings, and seeing him out of place without having anything flirty to say, was a divine gift.

She had been overanalyzing her feelings over the last few days, wondering if she should tell him how she felt or not, fearing that her words could confuse him, but finally had decided that she wouldn’t hide how she was feeling about him. After all, the only way Bryce could be feeling sure about her choosing him was hearing it explicitly from her mouth. Other than that, everything she says was part of the development of their relationship.

”Seriously.— She confessed.—I was missing you.”

“Damn, if I was feeling fantastic seeing you, I’m gonna burst hearing you say that.”

Eleanor knew it wasn’t an exaggeration. Bryce had a giant smile on his face, and she could see the emotion and stars blinding his eyes.

“Don’t burst please, just contain yourself so I can keep seeing you, okay?”

“Okay, I’ll do my best.”

“Thank you.”

“I was missing you too.”

Eleanor smiled at him tenderly for a few seconds, then she looked back at the folder in her hands, trying to finish it soon. As she felt that Bryce continued to stare at her without saying anything, Eleanor raised an eyebrow.

“Why you keep looking at me, weirdo?”

“Oh, sorry."—He replied, looking a bit uncomfortable. ”I-“

“Do you even work here or are you some kind of psycho who likes to watch interns doing their job?”

Bryce relaxed as he noticed Eleanor had been teasing him. It seemed that what Eleanor had told him, had caught him really off guard.

“Well, I do work here.—He replied, regaining composure— Don’t you see this surgical scrubs?

“Yeah, but you could get them anywhere as a disguise to your stalker hobby.”

Bryce chuckled.

“That’s true.”—He conceded—"Why don’t we go somewhere more… private… so I can demonstrate to you that I really work here?”

“What the hell, you just met me like 2 minutes ago and you wanna go somewhere private already?”

Bryce laughed, surprised

“Damn, I guess that was very bold.”

“Yes, but I like that, Dr. Bryce …?”

“Lahela”

“I like that, Dr. Lahela, and even if my mum taught me to not talk to strangers or go anywhere with them, I’ll join you once I finish with this paperwork.”

“Perfect. You know where to find me”—He murmured before walking out toward their favorite supply closet.

Once Eleanor was ready, she headed to the meeting point.

“Well then, Dr. Lahela, how are you going to show me you work here?”—She asked entering the room. Bryce approached her instantly, pressing her against the wall.

“I’m a surgical intern, which means I have magic hands. So…”—He took her by the hips to bring her closer to his body until they were a few inches apart. Both felt a lack of air the moment their eyes met. There was hunger in his eyes, and Bryce could say Eleanor’s mouth was thirsty of his kisses as she was slicking her tongue over her lower lip and then she gulped.

He tilted his head and began to short the distance slowly, until he captured her lips, a few gentle brushes first, just to savor her avidly after that. Eleanor wrapped her arms around his neck, converting the kiss in a voracious exchange of hidden desires.

In a matter of seconds, Bryce gripped her leg to his waist, and with his free hand encircled her waist to bring her incredibly tight, her bodies flushed. He soon moved his kisses to her cheek, then down her jaw and neck. At the feeling of his lips brushing her sensitive spot, Eleanor was invaded with goosebumps that made angle her head back involuntarily. Seeing his provocations were well received, Bryce started to rock his hips slowly to her core.

“Bryce”—She sighed when she felt a hand wandering under her scrubs, touching the skin of her back.

“Yeah?”

She pulled him away gently, biting her lower lip. Bryce took his hand away and loosed the grip on her hip.

“Elle, sorry I…”

“No, it’s not that—She assured, her face colored with heat, her chest pounding faster.—I… I want you to keep going, but not here.”

“Oh, okay.”

“I know we used to do it here before, but just for this occasion, I would like some normality, if you know what I mean.”

Bryce chuckled.

“Of course, Elle. I’d like that too.”

“So… My place, yours?”

“My place. Had to be tomorrow, though. I’m on a 24-hour shift.”

“Okay, that’s fine by me.”

They stared at each other, Bryce looking a bit hesitant to kiss her again, as things could get out of control if they keep kissing. Eleanor didn’t mind and brought her lips to his. The way he kissed her always left her craving for more, so she wouldn’t waste another second without having him.

He wrapped her waist and swapped positions, now he was against the wall and started to slide down, and Eleanor followed him until Bryce was sitting on the floor and Eleanor was sitting over his lap, her legs straddling him.

“Which part of ‘not here’ neither of us understood?”—Eleanor asked, playfully stroking his hair.

“Don’t worry, I’ll keep my word. I can deal with the self-control but only until tomorrow night.”

Eleanor resumed the kiss. The heat, the anticipation was irresistible, so she couldn’t help but move her hips softly against Bryce, feeling his bulge pressing her core.

“Elle”—He sighed—“I'll keep my word but…” He couldn’t finish. He placed both hands impatiently in her ass, his skin was aching just to feel it between his fingers.

“I can’t wait for tomorrow”—She sighed as she felt his tongue and then his teeth in the crook of her neck, and his hand all over her back and hips, like he was losing his mind in the touch of her skin.

“Me neither, but we’ll have to”

“Yeah, hope time flies.”

After a few moments of sweet torture, Bryce pulled away slightly to look at her in the eyes.

“I’ve got an idea, but that means to prolong our own agony.”

“What is it?”

“Let’s go dancing? We have done almost everything but go clubbing.”

“Oooooh, yes! I’ve been thinking about it too, love the idea.”

“Tomorrow then?”

“Yes, and after that, we go to your apartment to finish this.”

“You don’t have to tell me twice”

The next day Eleanor walked toward the Atrium fully dressed in a clubbing mood, feeling like it has been ages since she was dressed like that. A tiny black leather skirt that covered sufficiently her bum and tights with a red lace tank top that defined the curves of her waist with almost surgical precision, and over it, a matched leather jacket. Bryce was waiting for her in a multicolored shirt with a black cardigan on her hands.

The moment she was in front of him, he didn’t even conceal the hungriness in his eyes.

“Shit. I don’t know if I can take you out to dance dressed like that.”

“Oh, come on, let me have this put on for at least an hour, then you can take it off me at your please.”

“Damn Eleanor, you’re wild tonight”

“I’m in a clubbing outfit, Bryce. When I’m dressed like this, I’m a hoe, so get used to it.”

“But you’ll only be a hoe with me, right?”

“Of course, I’ll be your hoe tonight”

“Oh, crap, let’s go already before I drag you to my apartment.”—He complained, taking her by the hand.

After a short uber ride, they sauntered into a colorful nightclub, loud music already beating. Some hip hop and Latin hits. The fact that the club had Latin hits, was a special request by Eleanor, due that she enjoyed dancing reggaeton because of her Latin roots. After a few shots, Eleanor felt the music took control of her body, so she held Bryce by the hand and guide him into the middle of the crowd, moving her hips to the sexy Latin song that was playing. Bryce followed suit and placed a hand on her hip.

“It will always amaze me how well you dance, really”—She whispered in his ear.

Bryce kept pace with her, even though sometimes they would only mock and overact some moves just to end up laughing and kissing passionately.

After ten minutes of dancing, Eleanor was feeling the heat after realizing that dancing was foreplay for what was next. The way Bryce was moving his hips, the way he was touching her skin, roaming her hips, her waist, and how he pressed her back against his chest, was being the sexiest foreplay they could’ve ever done that night.

Eleanor was feeling the anticipation, the desperation to touch his body, to feel his mouth against every inch of her skin. And Bryce wasn’t thinking any differently.

Half an hour later, they were all sweated. But that just made them look even sexier. Eleanor gave him a heated, sloppy kiss, while Con Calma from Daddy Yankee was invading the dancefloor. She started to move her hips incessantly, then she turned her back to him seductively. Bryce pulled her by the waist, her body flush against his chest, and whispered in her ear:

“You moving like that is going me crazy”—Then he kissed the crook of her neck while one hand was wandering over her breasts and the other at her hips and tights not minding they were in a public space. Eleanor shuddered then turned back to him, and kissed him again, this time hard.

"Let’s go to your apartment."—She said in a husky murmur.—"I’m done with this foreplay.”

Bryce looked at her with such hungriness, that neither of them could suppress the desire for each other as if the world was about to end. Bryce lowered his hand past her hips, to caress her butt under her skirt, and grabbed it with both hands.

“Hey, someone’s eager”

“Can you tell?”—He whispered as he rocked his hips against hers.

Eleanor felt his bulge for the first time and didn’t even hesitate before put hand subtly over his pants, caressing him while feeling how it tightened at her touch.

“Fuck, Eleanor”—He groaned in her ear.

“I can’t wait to have it in my hands, in my mouth.” She whispered in a sultry voice.

“Oh, come on, let’s go”—He commanded, taking her by the hand. He practically dragged her through the dancefloor. In a matter of minutes, they had collected their clothes from the wardrobe and gotten a taxi.

It was the longest trip of their lives, between trying to take their hands off each other to not put a scene on the taxi; and trying to conceal the panting in their breaths, while the clothes were itching in their bodies, and the dirty words said were resonating in their minds.

When they reached the elevator in the building, Bryce took her cheeks and kissed her hard.

“Finally. I don’t know if I could’ve handled another minute”—He said, his voice sultry.

“Neither do I”—She replied, tugging his hair tightly.

When they reached the floor, he pushed her down the hall without parting lips, not even when they got to the door. Bryce opened it up almost blindly. They stepped inside, Bryce slamming the door shut while pulling Eleanor against the door, devouring her lips ravenously, drinking from her skin in every inch he caressed with his lips.

“Fuck yes”—She sighed. Bryce took her jacket off. He observed her lace tank top.

“Finally I can get rid of this sinful piece of fabric that’s been bothering me the whole night”—He said while cupping her breast tightly.

“You’ll have to wait a bit more”—She murmured, the moment she started to slid her hands over his torso, his muscles taut under his clothes. She removed his cardigan and shirt in one motion, leaving her torso bare. She watched him carefully, hungrily a few seconds, before began to kiss him all over his chest, pecs, and nipples.

“Eleanor”—Bryce shuddered at her touch, feeling her hands on his chest and her tongue stimulating his nipples. He smiled at the fact she remembered how much he loved this.

"God, I wanted this so …"—She whispered as she left a trail of kisses all over his torso—"So much.”

Feeling a bit dizzy, Bryce took her face and led her to his mouth. A dance of lips and tongues that became more and more ferocious, thirsty, needy. They needed more flesh, more heat, more pleasure. Bryce unzipped her skirt and pulled it down in a blink. In the next, his hands were skimming her ass with his hands expertly, while licking and biting the crook of her neck, just to finally slip his finger middle in her wet core. She moaned at his touch, cursing him. He just chuckled.

Then, he resumed his task, sliding his lips to the junction of her breasts, removing the annoying top in a single movement. When he intended to get rid of her bra, he stopped in his tracks, stunned at the look of her figure deliciously adorned in garnet-laced lingerie. He gasped when he met her eyes and found she was looking at him as if she knew how gloriously she looked that night. That self-assured look, that wasn’t recurrent in her, made his heart skip.

“God, you’re the most beautiful creation of the universe.”

“After you?”

“No. Top spot.”

“Wow, now that’s a compliment, Johnny Bravo.”

They both laughed and kissed tenderly.

“I wanna taste every inch of you”—He muffled after a few seconds, biting her ear.

“What are you waiting for?”

He brought his lips to her neck, first sliding soft kisses until he finally opened his mouth and began to bite her. Eleanor tugged his hair at the sensation in her sensitive spot. Bryce moved his hands to her back, unclasping her bra and tossing it to the ground. He massaged both breasts with his soft hands, just to then capture her nipples with his mouth, tasting and drinking the sweetness of her skin, of her pleasure.

“Holy fuck, yes”—She whimpered, feeling an electric shock waving to her core.

Suddenly, Eleanor felt a rush of pleasure in her sex. She opened her eyes just to find that Bryce had reached under her panties and was working on her sweet spot delicately.

“Oh God, Bryce”

“Ya like that?

The panties fell to the floor, his hands still rubbing her core, while her legs began to shake. She brought one leg up to Bryce’s hip to hold on him.

“Yes. Fuck, yes, just like… Ahhh”—She moaned as his finger pick up speed—“Bryce!”

“Yes, I love when you cry my name, babe, I wanna hear you.”

“Br… Fff... ”—But she couldn’t say anything.

Eleanor closed her eyes, completely overwhelmed with the sensations on her body.

"Look at me"—He ordered, serious.

Eleanor obeyed and looked at Bryce, who was staring at her hungrily as he continued to work on her clit.

"Bryce…” —She sighed, incapable to take her eyes off him, hypnotized. As if a magnet attracted her gaze to Bryce’s eyes, who had a serious and excited look that she had never seen before.

Suddenly he parted from her and started to kiss her shoulders, her chest, her abdomen until he reached the origin of her ecstasy. She felt his tongue gently caressing her clit, then devouring her folds eagerly.

“Ohmygod, Bryce”—She moaned, pulling his hair with both hands, completely desperate.

"Bryce, fuck…"—Her legs began to tremble incessantly, her strength leaving her body— "I’m gonna fall …”

In one swift motion, Bryce stood up, took her in his arms and laid her down on the couch that was a few feets away; and got on his knees. He took her tights gently in his arms to supported them on his shoulders, then he leaned to her sex, and began to move his head and tongue in circles, and then in lines, alternating the rhythm and intensity of the touch.

“Mmmm. You taste so good”—He sighed.

Eleanor looked down and realized that Bryce was staring at her, all focused on her pleasure. She stroked the strands of hair that fell in his forehead, and then rested a hand on his head, tugging his hair gently as she guided a pace, while with the other hand she tried to keep balance on the couch.

“Bryce”—She whimpered. Bryce huffed against her folds, making Eleanor pant at the vibrations in her clit. Then he took both hands to her breasts and started to massage and grip her nipples. Eleanor started to move her hips involuntarily. She was close to her climax.

“Give it to me, baby”—Bryce whispered, parting from her core just a second, and then he introduced two fingers in her center while licking her clit with the tip of his tongue quickly.

Eleanor couldn’t hold it anymore

“Yes, Bryce, FUCK YES!”—She groaned loudly, from the depths of her core, convulsing on the couch to finally vanishing into thin air.

She had reached a limit never before explored, which immersed her into a cloud of pleasure that caused her to float peacefully. Her head was spinning, losing track of time and space, feeling like she was floating in a sky full of pastel tones and sweet scents. It was warm and quiet.

She still could feel his tongue in her, getting every bit of her juices, savoring it like it was the most precious nectar, causing her a soft but pleasant sensation.

She didn’t know how much time had passed, but when she opened her eyes, she found herself being carried by Bryce like a koala bear to his room.

He placed her in the bed, delicately. She tried to narrow her eyes in Bryce’s direction, but it was still very blurry. She could tell, however, that he was taking off her pants, leaving only his underwear, and then he lunged to her side.

“Fuck”—She sighed.

“What’s wrong?”

"Umh? Nothing, just…"—She said, turning her face towards him, unable to look at him.

Bryce giggled

“What, you still haven’t come back?”

“No, I’m still floating somewhere… in a warm pink sky, near a black hole, probably.”

“Oof, I was that good, uh?”

"Good it’s an understatement"—She sighed.

Bryce rejoiced in the sight of Eleanor still with the effects of the orgasm. While she was regaining clarity, he turned to her, leaning on his elbow, to observe every inch of her exposed skin. He slid his fingertips on his favorite spots; her thighs, her hips, her waist, her breasts, her shoulders, and finally her soft little hands.

After a couple of minutes, Eleanor turned to him, exposing the curve of her waist even deeper. Bryce couldn’t help but grab her by the waist and pull her closer to his body.

“What kind of magic was that?”

“So advanced, that You-Know-Who would be jealous.”

Eleanor laughed hard. Then, she moved even closer to Bryce, sharing the warmth of their bodies. She kissed him sweetly while pushing him back onto the bed, laying on top of him. Soon, she brought her kisses to his neck, his sweet scent lusciously provocative made her more thirsty. Then she followed down his chest, his taut abdomen muscles feeling warm; until she reached the edge of his hips. She got to her knees in the middle of the bed and helped him remove his boxer. She caressed his exposed skin a few seconds, and then she leaned over him again, continuing the kisses on his hips, thighs, and then around his length. She felt his tension, the anticipation to feel her mouth in his sweet spot.

Eleanor sat back for a moment to stare at Bryce, the erotism of his figure was difficult to avoid. Bryce was serious but hungry, his expression a bit affected because of the anticipation. His naked body, with his erection not yet full, was a sight that exceeded all the dirty expectations she had had about Bryce in the last few days.

“Not for nothing all I’ve gotten on my mind since I left the supply closet was you, and the thought of eating you out tonight.”

“You have gotten incredibly good at dirty talk, what happened?”

“You.”

Eleanor wet her lips and leaned again into his crotch. She took his length with both hands and kissed the tip, first slowly and delicately, until it entered in her mouth, gaining more shape inside her. With the help of her hand, he began to stimulate the base, while with his mouth and tongue she drew circles on the tip

"God, Eleanor…"—He growled between groans—"You’re amazing.”

“Mmmm—She huffed, completely focused on him.

After a few moments, Bryce tugged her hair softly

“I want you, babe. Come with me.”

Eleanor got on her knees and watched him carefully lying on the bed, his face a little sweaty and excited. She approached him slowly, leaving her lips millimeters from him.

“I want you too. Since yesterday, and even before that.”

She kissed him. Suddenly Bryce grabbed her hips and sat her on his lap, her legs straddling him. Eleanor was surprised by his unexpectedness but smiled provocatively.

“I like it when you grow impatient.”

“I’ve been too patient, in fact.”

He kissed her hard, and after founding her entry, he pushed himself inside her. They both shuddered.

“Oh my god, yes”

“Finally”—He sighed with relief.

Eleanor began to move over him, guided by the grip of him in her hips. After a while, they parted briefly so Bryce could sit against the headboard of his bed. Once Eleanor straddled him, they kissed again, this time like desperate animals, as if each other were water and they hadn’t had a drop for days. The desperation growing inside them was primal. Eleanor lifted her hips over Bryce’s crotch, faster and faster. After a few moments, they both began to moan, their breaths colliding between kisses.

“Ohh, Bryce, you feel so fucking good inside me.”

Without warning, Bryce shifted his hands to her ass and gave her a loudly slap, causing Eleanor unexpected waves of pleasure inside her.

“Oooh fuck, yes”—She whimpered, her thrusts increasing swiftly.

“You like it?”

“Y-yes, yes, so much”

Bryce did it again, this time harder.

“Oh God, you feel amazing, Elle."—He groaned deep, sweat droplets starting to trickle down his face.

Eleanor cleared his face, then pulled him close to kiss him hard. They parted when the sensations began to consume them and their bodies began to shake.

"Ohh, ohh, yes!—She moaned, arching her back.

Bryce captured a nipple in his mouth, bringing her over the edge. She cried out his name desperately, her muscles squeezing hard, making Bryce obtain his own release seconds after.

They both found themselves in the middle of that ecstasy. Although orgasms feel different for each person, somehow they both felt like they reached exactly the same climax. Because the same cloud lulled them, and the same warmth sheltered them. Maybe the pink sky Eleanor mentioned before, rested on Bryce’s mind, making his heaven look just like hers.

Eleanor rested her forehead against his, her breathing ragged, their faces glistening with sweat. Bryce hurled himself onto the bed, taking Eleanor with him, propping her up on his lap.

"Shit"—He gasped a few minutes later when he regained some breath.

Eleanor pulled away, all sweaty and sticky, and lunged to his side, still gasping for air.

“That was… Wow. I’m glad we didn’t do it in the supply closet”—She sighed, pure satisfaction in her voice and face.

“This 36-hours waiting did worth it.”

“Yes, but I don’t know if I can handle it again.”

“There’s no need now, we both kept our promise to wait till this moment, and now that we made it…”

“Thank you for understanding and for waiting.”

“Nah, I wanted it that way too, even if yesterday seemed otherwise.”

Eleanor leaned to kiss him softly. They both cuddle in the middle of the bed until they went for the inevitable second round.

______

Chapter 7.

#bryce lahela #bryce lahela x mc #bryce x mc #bryce x casey #Open Heart #open heart choices #open heart fanfiction #oh choices #choices stories you play #choices #playchoices #choices fanfiction #Oh fanfic

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surveys-at-your-service · 3 years

Text

Survey #392

“l.a. is where stars come to die”

Do you think there’s anything you did better when you were younger? I think I was a better writer, honestly. Like I've developed in some areas, like being less over-dramatic, but I just think my creativity in wording and such has dulled down. Who was the craziest teacher you’ve ever had? I've never had a "crazy" teacher, honestly. What’s the last thing you got paid to do? Take pictures. What’s the most romantic thing you’ve ever done for someone else? How should I know? Ask either Jason or Sara. Have you ever wanted to model? No. Have you ever seen someone have a seizure? I THINK my sister? Teddy had seizures in his old age, too. What’s your favorite car? I don't have one, really. Do you know any HTML or CSS? If yes, how much? I know veeeeery little basics. LIke, I can change the color of shit and that's about it lmao. Do you tend to care about the lives of celebrities? Why or why not? Only celebrities I really really care about, like Mark. What do you think of the scene style? #aesthetic and I will ALWAYS be envious of the hair. Have you ever told an extremely inappropriate joke? Oh god, I remember one. What is the highest you have been up, other than in an airplane? On a certain faire ride, I wanna say. Is there any hope of you ever seeing your favorite band in concert? Ozzy does want to do another tour at some point, but he's fighting Parkinson's currently, so it's not guaranteed it will happen. Mom and I planned on going to his last one that was scheduled, but the diagnosis cancelled it. :( What is your favorite non-green vegetable? Uhhhhh I guess potatoes. What is your favorite non-traditional fruit? I don't think I've even had a non-traditional fruit. Just basic stuff. Have you ever had Swedish Fish? Yeah, I'm not a fan. What is your favorite origami shape? Birds, I guess. Do you usually take the stairs or the elevator? I pretty much always take an elevator if one's available because my legs can barely handle stairs at all. It's agonizing for me. Do you need a key card to get into the building you live in? No. What was the last takeout food you had? I had a burger from McDonald's a few days ago. Do you take the pickle off your burgers? No, I love pickles on burgers. Do you share a bed with anyone? Just my cat. If you’ve read or watched Harry Potter, which book/movie is your favorite? I haven't. What’s the last app you downloaded on your phone? I re-installed DragonVale. What do you know the most about? Meerkats, Markiplier, and Silent Hill, probably. What TV shows can you not stand? What's that stupid show on Adult Swim, Rooster Teeth or something like that? That shit was so dumb. Have you ever tasted your own tears? I mean not intentionally. Sometimes tears just fall down a spot where it happens. Are your legs hairy? I can almost guarantee to you that I probably have the hairiest legs of any woman you've ever met. Do you like Cheese-Itz? I love them! We don't really buy them though because both Mom and I can destroy a box of them. Have you ever built a sandcastle? I have. Did you ever watch Barney as a child? Yeah, I loved Barney, but not as much as my older sister. She literally "married" him, haha. Have you ever had a pet rabbit? No, but my older sis did as a kid. That poor thing died and Ashley didn't know for THREE DAYS. Mom took it out earlier and I guess she wanted to see how long it took Ash to notice? She didn't take great care of it, so. Are you wearing anything of any sentimental value? Describe? Yes, my friendship ring with Sara. To you, what is especially distracting? Tapping noises. When was the last time you did some major cleaning? MAJOR cleaning? Good question. How do you feel about people who neglect their pets? It sickens me. Have you ever contemplated cheating on anyone? Nope. When are you likely to lie? Probably when I don't want to seriously hurt someone. What is a personality type that you do not like? I hate people who think they know everything, are unwilling to acknowledge their flaws and work on them, feel they're better than others, are closed-minded, sexist, bigoted, racist... What is a personality type that you DO like? I am drawn to people who are empathetic and try to understand and consider more than just themselves, are caring and genuine, philosophical and think deeply, are calm, friendly, good listeners, and have a light sense of humor. Which of your friends is the least like you? In what way? I actually don't know. MAYBE Mini with her being extremely conservative to a frustrating degree and overwhelmingly religious. We diverge pretty strongly in beliefs that are important to me. How about the most like you? In what way? Sara! We have incredibly similar interests and morals, and we both are wild over animals. When was the last time you felt under-appreciated? I'm gonna be completely transparent here, even though it's uncomfortable to admit. I was very unhappy with the literally two interactions a poem I was really proud of got on dA. Like it was one I was trying to get published prior to just posting it there, so it was really disappointing to feel so overlooked when you worked hard on something you felt came out great. Does anyone take advantage of you or take you for granted? No. Are you taking anyone for granted? I sure as hell hope no one feels like I do. I definitely try to appreciate those I have to the utmost. What is one selfish thing that you do? I prioritize my alone time probably too much. How about something selfless? I'm pretty much always willing to listen to people's hardships and comfort them even if my own mental health is in poor condition. What do you like to do on your favorite holiday? Just be with family and really focus on how lucky I am to have them. What helps you fall asleep? I guess really paying attention to slowing my breathing, but that doesn't always work. It takes me at LEAST half an hour to fall asleep, so I struggle no matter what. Is there anyone you wish you were still friends with now? Megan. I really, really miss her. What is a fear you want to overcome? SOCIAL ANXIETY. UGH. What is something you do not like about yourself, with good reason? I'm lazy. What do you usually cry about? PTSD. Do you like pizza better on the second day? No. What do you like on your pancakes? Butter and normal syrup. Have you ever made up your own emoticon? I don't think so. How do you generally meet people? Online in one way or another. Have you ever seen a Broadway show in New York? No. Are you listening to music right now? Yeah, "God Hates Your Outfit" by Jeffree Star lmao. Look, it's catchy. Can anyone in your immediate family play the guitar? No. Have you ever wished to be an internet celebrity? How about a ‘real’ one? No. Like I've actually *loosely* considered trying to be a let's player with my love of games, but I don't even want to *risk* popularity; not that I think I'd get to that point, but still, I don't like the chance. Have you ever been kayaking? No. Do you still live with your parents? Yes. Do you believe you will never get over someone? I think Jason will always occupy at the very least a small corner of my mind. I just deal with loss so poorly in general, but that... that breakup was something. What do you order at Burger King? I don't like BK. Have you ever lived by yourself? No. Pretty sure I never could with my depression. What brand cell phone do you have? It's just a Tracfone, lol. Did you ever have a ‘security blanket’ when you were younger? Yes, my stuffed moose. What is your lucky charm? I don’t have one. Have you ever been in a wedding? Yeah, I was a bridesmaid in my sister's. Do you believe in yourself? ehhhhhh What time does your dad usually wake up in the morning? I don't live with him, so I can't say for sure. He's a mailman though, so he gets up early, I know. Who was the last person/people you were in a car with? Mom. What movie do you plan on watching next? I've been meaning to watch Jacob's Ladder for like... over a year, lmao. It served as an inspirational work for Silent Hill, and I know its reputation is brilliant, so I really want to see it. I just... don't really watch movies unless I'm in the theater. When something really scares you, what’s your immediate reaction? Gasp or go "what the fuck" or something along those lines. I can almost promise a curse word is coming out of my mouth, lol. Using song lyrics, say something to your most recent ex: I don't wanna get emotional digging through the songs that remind me of her, so pass, lol. You can only watch 4 TV shows for the rest of your life. What are they? Meerkat Manor, That '70s Show, maybe Pokemon even if I don't watch it anymore (it could be like a comfort show if I'm limited to four), aaaaand I think Ginga Densetsu Weed. Do you think it’s possible for a rap song to make you cry? ... Yes??? There are a couple that have for me. Does the idea of having a baby at your age scare you? I'm not having kids, sooo I don't have to worry about this. What band has the power to make you cry by splitting up? None. I'd be really upset if some did, but I wouldn't cry. Who is your favourite famous person who isn’t a singer, actor, or athlete? Well, I WOULD say Mark, but considering he's officially an actor now... guess not, haha. Uhhhh. Put him aside and I guess maybe Bindi Irwin. I'm not sure.

#survey #surveys #random questions #lyrics: ''god hates your outfit'' by jeffree star

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retphienix · 3 years

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It's been 6 years :)

On March 30th, 2015 I decided I wanted a gaming side blog. (so we're early, but shush, it's the month for me)

I didn't know what I'd use it for exactly, but I had ideas- something I always have even if most of them only get as far as daydreamin' or writing out before closing them :P

For proof on the lack of direction the blog initially had- the March 30th date is the anniversary of my first post, an in-depth and lengthy review of Dragon Warrior Monsters for the GBC.

If you know the blog then you know "Extremely long and in-depth reviews" aren't the norm around here. As a matter of fact, that first post is the ONLY one I've done!

The closest I've come to ever repeating that would be the (word of the day) Directionless video I put out on Hades to get a grip on the concept of making videos, but that wasn't nearly as much of a 'review' as that first post is.

Tangent, definitely planning on trying my hand at videos some more for the foreseeable future. Probably not gonna use the tagline Full Impressions that I tossed as a whim for the Hades video but yeah- I'm excited to try my hand at a few videos :) tangent over.

It didn't take me long to come up with what I'd like to do for the blog though :)

A few months later I liveblogged a challenge run of FFT where I used only Ramza- a solo run. - Which maybe only happened because I tried a nuzlocke run a year prior on my main account-

(Nuzlocke | FFT challenge run)

Thanks to that haphazard liveblog experiment I started to realize a couple things which became the primary motivators behind this blog.

1) I LOVE sharing experiences. No brainer, I'm sure, but being able to share my experiences, and compare them with others' experiences, and just that mutual sharing is uplifting and feels good to do.

2) Liveblogging is an EXCEPTIONAL motivator to buckle down and play all those games I said I'd play (cue everyone laughing because I'm still way behind and have an immeasurable backlog).

But I mean that, on both respects. I have plenty of motivators toward the blog today, but if I were to be concise it's pretty much "It's easier to beat games if I liveblog them- otherwise I get distracted and play other games" and "I love sharing experiences and thoughts with people about my favorite thing- games."

Since 2015 I've tackled around 70 games as full playthroughs, and an untold ton as one offs or just to ramble about for a bit.

I've had a lot of highlights over the years, and I don't talk much about it as an overall experience so I thought for the anniversary I'd try to do just that. Not everything- I can't say I have photographic memory that would bring all of it up without prompting after all :P But whatever comes to mind as I browse some of my old stuff- as well as some thoughts on what I'd like to see in the future.

It's gonna be a bit self-centric I assume as I type this preamble to it, so let me say outright that this blog wouldn't be half of what it is without all the people who've given it the time of day over the years.

From recommending games they love or appreciate, to comparing thoughts, to offering kind words for analysis I've done over the years, to pointing out when I'm dumb and misread a situation :P- to, yes, even the people who decided "Fuck this guy's ramble" and deleted my captions before reblogging my gifs way back during Hamtaro (Of COURSE I remember that! It's amusing lol).

This is better because of others, because of the interactions and the people I've gotten the chance to chat with or befriend. It's just a liveblog more or less, my own little bit of fun I toss out for myself if for anyone- so seeing others enjoy this or that from the work I put into sharing my experiences or thoughts is always a joy in itself :)

Anyway, onto selfishly rambling about some tidbits of the past :)

Also sorry but no, opted to not shove a ton of photos in, it does have a handful of links to old posts though :P

This'll be disorganized as heck as I'll add to it over time before I feel it's worth posting (or the tumblr post editor becomes a hassle and more or less forces me to).

First~

FFT Solo Ramza Challenge: Considering it was roughly the first thing this blog has done, it's also something that's stuck in my head a lot more clearly than most of the other stuff I've done to be honest lol.

In truth, this is partially because FFT is my favorite game, bar none. But it's also because the whole experience was pretty new to me. Prior to it I had really only done one self-imposed-challenge that wasn't requested by the game in some manner and that was a nuzlocke run of Blue version.

So adding a challenge to my favorite game was a fantastic experience!

Notes I just wanted to say today about that run: If anyone enjoys FFT I honestly recommend giving it a shot for the unique story it lends itself to. I do recommend skipping the rules until after the second battle but that's up to YOU to decide.

My first post on the subject is me complaining about spending 4 hours grinding out the second fight and, despite hyperbole being my natural state, that was NOT hyperbole.

It DID take 60~ restarts to beat. It DID take 4 hours. The reason is that that 2nd battle is RNG as HECK, you HAVE to have Delita do some meaningful actions, you HAVE to have the enemies miss and make poor plays, you damn near HAVE to crit a few instances to save yourself from taking too much damage.

It's a numbers game to the extreme, so I wouldn't fault anyone for 'cheating' and skipping the 2nd fight for the ruleset lol.

The memory that stands out the most for that run is actually isolated in a post in which Ramza (Purrick in this run) talks like a total badass as just ONE DUDE running into a room full of enemies. I just think on that as a great encapsulated view of what it was like. The run started off face grindingly difficult, but because FFT is a game that offers so much freedom to the player it was extremely easy to 'break' the game into making Purrick overpowered as hell.

That's something I love about some tactical RPGs, I love having the ability to play smart so that I can play stupid later on, and breaking the game into making him one shot god is certainly a good payoff for playing smart early on :P

RetQuick: I miss RetQuick, it was primarily a short experiment I did in 2015 where I'd play a game for a short span of time (REALLY short, like 10-20 minutes) and record that for the purpose of making gifs and saying a short piece on what I thought.

It's one of those formats where the purpose was pretty shallow- but had a reason. I wanted to try making some gifs with some tools that existed online, so I made an excuse to do just that.

I also wanted to play a TON of games, usually through emulation on my sister's PSP, and this let me do that.

These two minor goals came together and so I spent a while making RetQuicks which were honestly more fun to make than they had any right to be. I mean the gifs were tedious but the playing? The thought sharing? The end product ocassionally having more appeal than just a photoset? It was fun.

I'm thinking whenever I have trouble picking a game for the blog I'll revisit the format... sorta.

I already reused it for a short stint to show clips I had no plan on expanding into a playthrough, but that died as well as it was too similar to Tidbits posts (another tag I no longer really use).

My thought is to rebrand retquick as something of a tryout for what game comes next. Play a handful of my backlog games for an hour or so each and say some thoughts before saying which one I'll continue as the main game for that period of time.

Old Tag Stuff: One of those things that only sticks to me since I made the decisions but it's always funny for me to look back on my old posts because I was apprehensive as hell toward making my posts visible. The reason my early playthroughs on the My-Tags page are variants of Ret instead of just "The name of the game so people can find this post" is because I felt like a liveblog would just spam the tag to hell-

Something I don't remotely feel bad for doing anymore.

So I avoided getting any sort of spotlight for quite a while on the blog for little reason.

Why Retphienix?: This is just a dumb thought I wanted to share and I'm sure I've said before.

It stands for retro!

Yeah!

Ain't that dumb and also not a real shorthand? lol

I think I have some sort of deer in headlights anxiety towards naming things, I mean do you think I think Full Impressions is a good summation for a video? I don't. But perhaps that's overshadowed by the other inexperiences and anxiety driven decisions that had- doesn't matter.

Retphienix is Retphienix because I sat there in 2015 and thought "Well... what do I name an alt account?"

My main is Redphienix, which yes, is ALSO a terrible name AND is misspelled. But it's that because of sentimental reasons. As a kid I misspelled Redphoenix when making my gamertag (I knew how to spell Phoenix back then as well, I was too excited about xbox live and misspelled it) and it's become something of a sentimental misspelling.

So I wanted to make a mix on that for my game blog, but I had no idea what. In the end I thought "RetroPhienix? I don't know. Retphienix is closer to Redphienix. I'll do that" and so it was done.

And just like how Redphienix is both bad and misspelled but exists because of sentimental reasons- Retphienix has acquired the same 'flavor' in my eye lol.

Aspirations for the blog: I have no immediate ramp up plans or road map or whatever, and in truth I'll be happy if the blog stays just as it is forever- up until tumblr ends- I cry over lost posts- and I reopen it on another platform.

But I do have blurry half-considered daydreams that I'd like to see happen for the blog through some hard work or shifts on my part.

One is something I'm already doing kinda, hence my embarrassing means of bringing it up a lot lately. Videos- I want those. I wanna make some looks back on series people don't talk about that I enjoy, I want to make videos sharing my thoughts on games I beat for the blog (like what full impressions kinda was, but I don't think they'll have a unified name from here on out). Maybe retrospectives, but mostly when I think of making a video tied to retphienix or me in general it's me looking at a game that said something to me, and saying it louder with my own interpretations on it.

You know the kind, videos where they talk about a video game but not the whole thing- just a singular message they really heard loud and clear from it intentionally or not. I dig those and I know I end a lot of games having plenty to say that could be directed into such a format.

We'll see.

And I'm along for the ride on that one as well- currently I'm keeping my eyes on whatever is directly next, which happens to be "I plan on playing Omori, if it clicks as something to talk about I would like to take a shot at that in a video too!"

The other is that I'd like to build a small community. Wouldn't know the first thing on doing that in a modern sense, but just a little online friend group to chat with and play games together. Something that could open up multiplayer and coop experiences being better shared on the blog and would just in general expand my gaming to what it used to be back on the 360 when I had a large group to play with.

Since the 360 era ended I've pretty much closed off- stopped playing competitive games due to lack of interest- and slowed down to playing all games either solo, with randoms (and no mic usually), or with my cousin. It's a rare instance when I play with some good people like @gamesception or another friend of mine, John.

When I diverted from playing competitive games nonstop toward other genres I didn't intend to also cut out all my online gaming buds, it just kinda happened, and I never really put any effort into rectifying that.

So more or less I'd like to one day sit down and work on a discord server, and then buck up and put the leg work in to make some gamin' buds again, but that's such a vague concept anymore.

Sounds all sad and what not but it's more ambivalent, I made decisions that

changed how gaming worked for me after the 360 and this is just where it landed for better and worse- I'd just like to see if I can make it a little better :P

General things I think when I think retphienix: Honestly? I think of how much fun I've had over the years and how thankful I am to have had an outlet that encouraged me to explore more of the medium.

I REALLY love games. I went to college for games, I've written LEAGUES about games, I've played countless games, my childhood was games, my adult life is games- games games games yada yada yada.

So when I think of retphienix I think of how without it I probably wouldn't have explored a lot of the corners of gaming that I have.

I genuinely, and I mean this, might not have sat down and beaten FF7 for myself and would have considered the amount I played as a kid to be enough.

I might not have played Chrono Trigger yet, and I KNOW I wouldn't have played Chrono Cross, and I'm happy as hell to have played both of those. CT was a mind blowing moment for me that showed me just how good an RPG can be, and CC gave me miles to think of in terms of innovating an RPG and how beholden to the narrative a sequel should be (I don't feel CC should have been chrono at all lol).

I DEFINITELY wouldn't have given New Vegas another chance. And I know I'm a sourpuss on NV, I've been that way since I maxed my achievements on the 360 for it, but replaying it really did reveal to me how exceedingly negative I was being.

My memories had become "It's brown and a boring location >:(" and "The factions all suck and it doesn't do anything with the idea of bad factions >:(" and became "It's... a little brown guys, not a big fan of the area" and "They didn't do enough with exploring the gray factions" while adding "Wait. This is pretty damn fun. And 90% of the additions are stellar. And I forgot about Dead Money, my favorite dlc in any game ever with a story that tears at my heart every time I think of it, NV good actually?"

Faxanadu would have remained a cool game I saw on SSFF and not a game I played to the end and fell in love with the aesthetic feel it has!

Also that's a game I cheated like crazy on lol, I would do it again! Save state scumming games meant to be rudely difficult is only fair :P

I probably would have never sat down to play through Windwaker which was such a positive and uplifting experience that I now get the most relaxed and warm feeling in my heart when I see those blue waves.

There's so many experiences I would have left on the table in favor of like... putting more hours into a live service title or something.

Maybe, and no offense to my cousin or anyone else playing it, but maybe I'd be no-lifing World of Warcraft nonstop just stagnating my interest toward the skinner box mechanics of an MMO?

Some offense, actually but lightheartedly lol.

But beyond the entire games I've played for the blog, when I think retphienix I picture all the time making gifs, all those games I played on the PSP for short stints, buying a retron 5 to add to what I could explore and being stoked when they shipped a freebie box of old controllers to go with it, getting angry at the retron for being a Piece Of Shit lol, crying at the end of damn near every game with an emotional story because I'm a big emotional mess of a person who finds investing and crying at a story way too easy thanks to empathy pulls, oh!-

Getting excited whenever I found that I had a "*controversial*" opinion that no one would care about lol. Like the one that comes to mind is that I thoroughly believe that Dragon Ball Z II: Gekishin Freeza!! for the NES is WAY better than the fandom recognized and appreciated sequel/remake Dragon Ball Z: Legend of the Super Saiyan!

How many people do you hear talking about either game, let alone saying the NES game that is roughly half of the SNES remake is the better one :P But I stand by that! The SNES one is a remake of DBZ1 and 2 for the NES but it loses all the charm and some of the fun of the NES ones by being a lackluster SNES game!

lol

I admitted wholeheartedly that this post would be a lit-

little directionless (gotta love the new tumblr poster making me break sentences like that), but to sum things up.

It's been 6 years. It's been an untold amount of work to be honest- liveblogging a game, at least for me, hasn't been the easiest thing. It's a lot of thinking out my thoughts (heh), it's a lot of learning tools to make the capturing process possible, it's a lot of experimenting, it's a lot of writing and editing, and, well, sometimes it's just tough.

I mean I went to school for coding, not video editing, not writing, not image processing, not this or that- but this hobby has introduced a lot of things even if only at a VERY base level (I admit fully to using online alternatives to make gifs for instance).

I learned a lot about, well, a lot of things in order to use this blog to learn more about games- and all that work has become part of why I've loved all 6 years of this blog.

6 years of gaming, work, and you all- and it's been worth the investment :) Here's to many more and all of you whether you stumble upon this post or not- literally anyone who's interacted in these 6 years, thank you, and anyone who hasn't I offer you well wishes as well.

#Retphienix #gaming #video games #gaming liveblog

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jandjsalmon · 3 years

Text

FICS I’VE READ THIS WEEK (30)

Hello everybody!! It’s been a week, eh? Saturday was one of my best Saturdays of the quarantine. Definitely rocked out to Miley Cyrus and N'Sync. It was a good day. 💙

For the rest of the week, I took time off work (because with the cancellations of all our actual vacations this year - the boss still says I have to take time off) - so you’d think I’d have more time for reading fic... but I didn’t! I have spent most of this week watching Star Trek: Discovery with my husband from the beginning - he wanted me to watch it with him when it originally aired but I was put off by the wrong Klingons... but he promised me that I’d get over it. I’m still not over how ridiculous they are - but I enjoyed the show regardless.

I also got to introduce my still quarantining daughter to Northanger Abbey and that was delightful. We are starting on North and South next. Oooh and we started the kids on Schitt's Creek and that has been a laugh and a half. My oldest might have a friend!crush on Stevie. Adorable. They don't get my Dan Levy love yet... but they will. Lol.

When I do have had opportunity to read, I'm doing a lot of comfort reading. What is your favourite comfort read? What other things do you do when you just need a breather from the stress in your life? Music? Podcasts?

I've got one more day off and then I'm in for the crushing stress of year end at my little (big) municipality. Christmas break is only 5.5 weeks away! I'm counting down. Lol.

Stay healthy and stay safe. 😘

My reading list from Nov 06 to Nov 12

Week 1 (119 chapters)

Week 2 (158 chapters)

Week 3 (81 chapters)

Week 4 (98 chapters)

Week 5 (117 chapters)

Week 6 (99 chapters)

Week 7 (88 chapters)

Week 8 (149 chapters)

Week 9 (194 chapters)

Week 10 (220 chapters)

Week 11 (157 chapters)

Week 12 (97 chapters)

Week 13 (89 chapters)

Week 14 (44 chapters)

Week 15 (78 chapters)

Week 16 (72 chapters)

Week 17 (160 chapters)

Week 18 (119 chapter)

Week 19 (118 chapters)

Week 20 (73 chapters)

Week 21 (111 chapters)

Week 22 (146 chapters)

Week 23 (334 chapters)

Week 24 (74 chapters)

Week 25 (105 chapters)

Week 26 (156 chapters)

Week 27 (133 chapters)

Week 28 (70 chapters)

Week 29 (48 chapters)

Week 30 (79 chapters)

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RIVERDALE (Bughead) - 3

the double by @meditationonbaaal (chapter 3)

In Every Memory by bearbaitbrook (1/1)

For Better, For Worse by @go-ldy (1/1)

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Bughead Rereads -11

Pin-Up by @mistressofmalplaquet (1/1)

Iceland by @mistressofmalplaquet (1/1)

Peepshow by @mistressofmalplaquet (1/1)

Hop(e)s and Dreams by @georgiegirl8 (8/8)

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MISC. NON RIVERDALE - 35

A Clever Distraction by Hollyn (Robb/Margaery) - 1/1

The Writer by @margaerystark (Robb/Margaery) - 5/5

The Right Path by @margaerystark (Robb/Margaery) - 2/2

Friends Don't by @margaerystark (Robb/Margeary) - 8/8

Time After Time by @fiveyaaas (Five/Vanya) - chapters 1-3

Wrong Number by @mynewblackdress (Five/Vanya) - 1/1

A different life by Chevalier_Barthelemy (Five/Vanya) - chapter 11

Golden Snitch fluttering by @nivalvixen (Draco/Ginny) - 1/1

which of your lives is this? by @saturnblushes (Katniss/Peeta) - 6/6

The Late Bloomer by @jj-jj-12 (Ben/Rey) - chapter 16

Four Letter Word by @dresupi (Theon/Sansa) - chapter 4

ask to be unbroken (or be brave again) by @theblackestfrost (Sweeney/Laura) - chapters 17 & 18

Unclouded by @anonlady (Dani/Pelle) - chapter 16 (and it was GLORIOUS)

be the one to stay by @livinginrhythm (Harry/Allie) - 1/1

A Moment Out of Time by @drstrangewillseeyounow (Michael/Ash) - 1/1

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Misc. Rereads - 30

The Deaf and the Blind and the Color Red by @thehumantrampoline (Sherlock/Molly) - 11/11

Unholy Affekts by @rimanez (Dani/Pelle) - 19/19

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💙💙💙

#fics i've read this week #reading fics with jandy

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acidproofnotebook · 3 years

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OPM Chapter 84, Update 125

As first published online

Translator: u/Mynthence

Title Page: In order to remain solitary, instead of in solitude.

Page 1 Page 2 Page 3 Page 4 Page 5

Movements that are a perfect blend of attack and defense.

Even though it’s the same Water Stream Rock Smashing Fist the difference in degrees of completion are plainly evident.

The result is obvious.

Page 6

Fuu!!

Page 7 Page 8 Page 9

grab

Bwoh!?

Page 10

Ubuh!!

Page 11

Wh…what’s…with…

This flashy assault, it’s not like the damn geezer at all…

Page 12

N…not good…

My consciousness is fad…

No….I’m gonna die…

…….tsk!!!

Gwah!

Page 13

What’s with those weird movements

where did you learn them?

Like a beast

Not yet!

Page 14

If I can use the heroes that are unconscious as hostages, there’s still a chance!!

I won’t let you

Ugah

Page 15 Page 16

Bang!

I’ve taken care of all the monsters that came out of the hole

All that’s left is Garou

Page 17

There’s still some monster-like reactions but

Beep beep…

For some reason I can’t ascertain the exact number and location…

Will going through that hole take us to the Monster Association’s base?

The guys from the Monster Association…were they wiped out?

They’re useless…!!!

Page 18

I thought we brought enough forces to capture Garou alive but…

Demon Cyborg…to think that he would be this strong

Silver Fang is here too. With this there’s no chance to take him away…

But if I go back empty-handed after expending all these troops, I might be the next one to be eaten by Orochi…

Page 19

Garou will just have to break through this situation with his own power…

…but it’s hopeless…

Should I start thinking about how to live after leaving the Monster Association…?

Hey brother…if it was you…

Would you still be able to stand up with his level of injuries?

…if I was 60 years younger I could try

…probably

Alright! Just a little bit more!!!

Let’s finish this before the other heroes show up, Bang!

Indeed

Page 20

Gugi…

My arms aren’t working properly anymore…

That geezer Bang, going after his former number one disciple when he’s been weakened…how vicious is he?

Page 21

Not to mention that the geezer that’s beating me up with him is Bomb, the master of the Whirlwind Iron Cutting Fist

For the leaders of the martial arts world to come at me two-on-one, do they have no shame or care for their reputations?

Even if I pretend to beg for my life to these guys, I’m sure the Demon Cyborg won’t let me go

In other words, in order to overcome this extremely critical situation, I need to kill all three of them

Page 22

That’s impossible.

Know the pain of my “number one disciple” Charanko

Garou!!

Page 23

Let’s play Hero!

Garou. You’ll play too, right?

Let’s play, let’s play.

Okay

Page 24

Introductory music

Justice Man has arrived!

Justice Man Kick

Ouch!

Hey

Page 25

That’s dangerous

What?

I feel bad for him

………………

Then you should play the part of the Monster

Justice Man Cross Chop

Woah

Why did you dodge

S, sorry Tacchan

I scratched up my hand

You’re the Monster. Why can’t you read the mood?

Hold Garou down

Okay

Page 26

Justice Man Kick!

I’ve defeated the Monster, Garou Poop Man~

What’s this, is it the thing they call a flashback?

This is a fairly private memory I’d prefer to not remember

This should be…Right…Tacchan…the popular kid in my class…

Page 27

Eh? What? Why are the boys fighting?

Did anyone call the teacher?

Garou’s going wild

Garou got mad, even though we were just playing

I can’t…stand it anymore…

What’s with him?

Tacchan

Fight me!

Huh? What are you saying?

It’s just Hero

Page 28 I don’t want to be the Monster anymore! It’s not fun! Fight me, and if I win, you have to promise that you won’t bother me anymore!

Sabuchin, Yochan, hold Garou down

That’s not fair…stop…let me go! I…

Ugh

Damnit!!

Woah, he’s snapped! Call the teacher

Tacchan, run away

Hold him down! Hold him down!

What’s going on?

Perfect timing. You guys help out too.

He got carried away because Taachan’s too nice

Gross

I heard Garou got pissed off at Taachan while they were playing Hero. (lol)

Seriously? What’s he thinking?

Poor Taachan

Page 29

Taachan would easily get carried away

Taachan was good at sports

Taachan liked bullying weak people

Taachan was popular with the girls

Taachan was a disgusting guy

Taachan was popular

I was the gloomy guy who was always alone

I didn’t have any friends

I hated popular people

Why did you go wild?

Teacher, Taachan always

I heard you got mad while playing Hero. Is that true?

They always make me be the Monster

You can’t even tell the difference between make-believe and reality!?

That’s not it. Everyone says it’s my fault because Taachan is popular…

You’re the one who went crazy! How will you take responsibility if the windows get broken!

NO!

Page 30

It’s not that I hate being the Monster.

Is it that I didn’t like Taachan being the Hero?

No that’s not it

I was sensing a crushing sense of unfairness through the Hero game. A game designed in a way that would let the popular kid who was loved by everyone to one-sidedly beat up the weak kid that no one liked.

You did something bad, so go apologize.

I’m calling your parents too

This wasn’t just bullying. The game that faithfully reproduced the children’s TV shows was accepted by the public. You’re free to play any role that you want in this game, but the role of the Hero requires the approval of all those who are playing, so naturally I never had a chance to play that part. And of course, a scenario where the Monster wins doesn’t exist to begin with, so I have to always lose.

Page 31

What’s Justice! What’s Evil! In the end, I get killed because of the majority! I can’t accept that! It’s unfair!

I can’t explain the reason very well but I’m angry!

I just want to let them know!

I want them to experience a weakling’s attack!

I want to deny the positions of good and evil!

Page 32

He’s going to fall

This is the end

Page 33

Like I’d let myself be finished off in a place like this!

Page 34 Page 35

What?

Page 36

Oh!

Page 37 Page 38

What’s with that power…

from that broken body!?

Page 39

Give it up Garou!

If you keep on going… You’ll really die!!!

Bang, above you!

Page 40 Page 41

Woah!?

Page 42

A monster!?

So there were still some left!!!

Page 43

Genos!

Bang, you saw his appearance just now!

He’s a monster now! He even has companions!

It’s okay if I shoot Garou down with him, right?

Page 44

Did you hear that!!?

I’ll take Garou away from here

You can crush everyone on the ground right now!

I leave the rest to you!!

???

Page 45

Rasen Shoukyaku Hou (Spiral Incineration Cannon)

Page 46

Elder Centipede!

Page 47 Page 48 Page 49 Page 50

What was that!?

Page 51 Page 52

Disaster Level: Dragon Giant Mysterious Insect Elder Centipede

Page 53

W…what….

Is this a living being !!?

Oh no!!!

We need to protect them!

Page 54

Here we go

Page 55 Page 56

So this is the source of the reaction from before…

It’s not that I couldn’t pinpoint its location…it was too big!

Page 57

To think that it could take a direct hit from the cannon and have no injuries

This is going to be a tough opponent…

That centipede is…

Page 58

What do you think you’re doing, butting in like that!

Just let Elder Centipede take care of things here

He is a great calamity that swallows up everything

I’m fascinated by that unstoppable destructive power

You’re not thorough enough Hero Hunter

Once you defeat an opponent, you need to make sure you finish them off

It seems that all those heroes lying down over there are still alive

Page 59

Well…don’t worry

Elder Centipede will end everything

Stop interfering!

Let me down right now!

Those are my prey!

Hey, quit struggling

Damnit! Go back!

I won’t forgive you!

Hahaha…why are you so mad.

It’s your fault for not finishing the job.

Also…it’s convenient that we can erase two S-class here.

For the Monster Association, S-class heroes are the biggest threat

Page 60

You also directly experienced it

…..

In any fight there’s something called compatibility

According to our adviser Gyoro Gyoro

Out of all the heroes there are only four who can stand up against the Elder Centipede

Page 61

The peerless one wielding the strongest psychic ability “Tornado of Terror”

The one whose hidden military strength can’t be grasped by even the Hero Association “Metal Knight”

Page 62

The strongest man on earth “King”

And…the top hero that pushed Elder Centipede to the brink of death two years ago

“Blast”

Page 63

They say that Elder Centipede decided to cooperate with the Monster Association in order to get its revenge on Blast

It’s eager to pull Blast, who doesn’t come to the forefront, back onto the battlefield.

But…Unfortunately, those two don’t have the ability to break through this current situation.

Silver Fang is without equal in regards to his strength in hand-to-hand combat, but that only applies to opponents that are of a size that can be affected by martial arts.

Demon Cyborg’s abilities are outstanding but

He shouldn’t be equipped with any weapons that can take on a giant insect beast

And his firepower can’t go beyond the capabilities of his weapons

That’s his limit

Page 64

They will definitely be destroyed

Here it comes!!!

Page 65 Page 66

shine

Page 67

Whirl Wind

Water Stream

Page 68

Todoroki Kuuretsu Ken (Roaring Sky Splitting Fist)

Page 69 Page 70 Page 71 Page 72

What is that move

We have a special move that takes advantage of the opponent’s openings

We’re counting on you to distract it

It broken that super hard shell into pieces…!?

This is

The pinnacle of skill

Page 73

Not yet Not yet Not yet Not yet Not yet Not yet Not yet Not yet

Page 74 Page 75

Oh….

Goaaaahhhh

Guh

Page 76

Oww…

We let down our guard

But it was effective

The shockwave is circulating throughout its body

Blow up into pieces you monster

It’s a super move that can only be pulled off once by geezers like us

I’m glad it hit

Thank you Genos

Page 77

It’s finished

Page 78

Hm?

Page 79

Seriously?

Page 80

This guy molted…!!!

And didn’t it get bigger than before!?

No way!

Page 81

We can’t beat this thing…!

If we have to protect the unconscious heroes at the same time…

What should we do!? Bang!

Even if we back off, it would probably come after us and…

It’s all residential areas outside of Forest Park…

If we leave, it’ll affect the civilians…

Page 82

Bang

I’ll fight it

I’ll hold off that centipede as long as I can so

Take the injured and escape

Page 83

Genos

Are you saying that you’ll fight that thing on your own?

I can’t agree with that…

You don’t need to push yourself. You know that you can’t win

You young ones have still have a future

Genos

Just don’t overdo it

Page 84

Is that…

Really okay?

Page 85

There’s no way

Page 86

That’s okay

Page 87 Page 88 Page 89

There’s no way!

Cannons don’t work on it!

Page 90

This guy

And the guy from yesterday

Page 91

And Garou

Are all part of the Monster Association

This fight

Is unavoidable

Page 92 Page 93 Page 94

Dual Blade Rush

That’s what it means to fight against them

Page 95

I’m participating in this fight

Grind into pieces

Page 96

If you say that’s being reckless

Crack

Uh…

Page 97

Genos!!!

At this rate

I…

Page 98

Won’t be able to stay in the fight

Page 99 Page 100

Jet Drive Arrow

Page 101

Uooohhhh!!!

Page 102 Page 103

Ugoah

He went into its mouth

Oh no…

Page 104

Digestive juices

I’ll completely melt you in a few seconds

You’re the one that’s going to melt

Page 105

Chou Rasen Shoukyaku Hou (Super Spiral Incineration Cannon)

Page 106 Page 107

…….!!!

He did it!!

Clank

…..

Page 108

Crack crack

Page 109

Crack crack

Crack

grin

Again…

I…

Can’t win…

Can’t protect…

Page 110

We’re getting out of here

sizzle

Brother! Grab those guys and run!!

It’s useless

What’s wrong?

Are you disgusted that you ended up being partially responsible for slaughtering those heroes?

Page 111

That’s not it!

I’m just disappointed by this ending!!!

I…want to defeat them with my own power!

By doing so, I become the symbol of fear…!!

That’s the meaning behind the hero hunting!!!

The symbol of fear? You? Hahaha…

If you were to go back now, you would only end up getting stomped on together with the heroes.

Right now you don’t have the strength to go against Elder Centipede or the officers of the Monster Association.

Page 112

Guh…

Just…you wait…and see…

What should I do…

Page 113

What is it that I lack…!?

Are there still more guys like that?

In front of guys like that…

Am I only able to suck on my thumb while watching them…?

Bang! This isn’t good. If we keep going

We’ll exit the Forest Park!

Page 114

Also…I can’t run for very long while carrying this many people

How old do you think I am

Do or die…

Brother

Page 115

I’m going to go all out for the last time in my life

Page 116

Elder Centipede~!!!

Hey! You pest!!!!!

I’ve brought the “Blast” that you’ve been looking for!!!!!

Page 117

That voice is…King!!?

Blast!?

What…!

!!!?

Look!!

Its movements have stopped

And it’s turned around

Page 118

Blast…?

Yes…that’s right! The opponent that beat you up and made you run away while peeing your pants….the hero Blast!!

If you want to fight against Blast again, come over here!

What’s wrong? Are you so scared that you can’t move!? You’re spineless!!! Hey, if you’re going to shit yourself, do it at home!

A weak little bug like you should go back underground and suck on your mom’s tits!!!

Page 119

King made it to the location in City S where Elder Centipede reappeared!!!

That’s good! King should be able to do something about this situation…

Yes…there are still several heroes in that area

And when I told him that they might become casualties from any fighting nearby

He told me “Give me any information that might provoke Elder Centipede”

He undoubtedly plans on luring the enemy to where he is and fighting it one-on-one

Page 120

When Blast severely wounded it, it escaped and ran away underground

I hope we can defeat it this time…

It was top secret information, but I relayed the information detailing the monster and Blast’s connection to him

Also, I told him that if the battle were to be prolonged or if they were to change locations, the damage to the surrounding areas would be tremendous

And what how did he respond?

Just one word: “Understood”…

Together with the reverberations of the King Engine

Page 121

Draw the enemy this way so there aren’t any more casualties…

If the enemy is wounded, finish it off before it escapes underground…

Finish it as quickly as possible…

Any attacks should be contained within a limited range…and no attacks that might knock the centipede into the residential areas…

That’s all

Page 122

…..

…tama?

Page 123

Saitama~!!!?

It’s going to hit

Page 124 Page 125 Page 126

Ser

Page 127 Page 128

ious

Page 129

Pun

Page 130 Page 131

Page 132 Page 133 Oh

Page 134

Is that you, Genos?

Page 135

So you were here.

Just like King said

Yeah…and it looks like we came just in the nick of time

Good thing we came

Oh…?

Saitama…you look kind of refreshed

What happened?

I kind of feel like I let off a lot of steam

Page 136

I had a lot of stress built up because you kept beating me in those games

So he was still pissed off

Well…I wanted to teach you that your way of fighting with only one style of attack isn’t good…

Saitama-sensei, I wish to ask you a question

What is it?

What do you think I am lacking?

Isn’t it power?

Page 137

….!!!!

Thank you very much!

Ahhhhhhhh….That’s no good…

You probably shouldn’t use Saitama as a point of reference, Genos…

Sensei’s fights show me the path that I should take

The symbol of strength

That is what I should aim for…

I will also reach that place

Page 138

Garou…so you finally passed out

Rest well

We’ll reach Orochi soon

#OPM #manga #manga chapters #translation #chapter 84 #long #transcript

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rushingheadlong · 4 years

Text

“It’s Late” Song Analysis (and mini-rant)

Disclaimer: I’m not writing this to argue that Brian didn’t cheat. He did. We’re not debating that today. What we are discussing is the fact that Queen songs frequently have several different layers of meaning and there are other, I think equally valid, interpretations of It’s Late that don’t reduce the song down to just “lol he done cheated”.

-------------------------------------------

First, let’s acknowledge that the literal story that the song is telling is the ending of a love affair. In Brian’s own words:

“It’s another one of those story-of-your life songs. I think it’s about all sorts of experiences that I had, and experiences that I thought other people had, but I guess it was very personal, and it’s written in three parts, it’s like the first part of the story is at home, the guy is with his woman. The second part is in a room somewhere, the guy is with some other woman, that he loves, and can’t help loving, and the last part is he’s back with his woman.”

Even in that quote Brian is hinting at layers of meaning by saying, “all sorts of experiences” that he had and that he thought other people had. I’ve seen several people criticize this by pointing out that cheating isn’t a universally relatable experience. That’s true, but that criticism is based on the assumption that the song is only about cheating… and I don’t think it is.

There are several reasons I think the song is about other experiences and emotions in Brian’s life beyond just cheating:

Firstly, that above quote - I genuinely do not think that Brian is naive enough to believe that cheating is a universal experience, which makes me suspect that there is more to this song than just that and that there are other things at play here that other people could find relatable.

Brian writes personal songs all the damn time, but they’re very rarely as straightforward as the lyrics would make you believe. ‘39, for example, has sci-fi themes on the surface but Brian has said that it’s also about coming home from a tour and feeling out of place in his “normal” life. Even something like Fat Bottomed Girls, which seems like it should be straightforward about Brian liking heavier woman, has been explicitly confirmed by Brian to be written about Freddie’s choice in partners. (And if you look at the women Brian has dated, you can see that it’s not really about him at all.)

Working off of that, I have a very hard time believing that Brian would want to write a song about his cheating by writing a song explicitly about cheating. Especially considering that Brian referencing his cheating in Now I’m Here is done rather cryptically (“Down in the Dungeon just Peaches and me”) and not anywhere near as obvious as the story in It’s Late. Brian May has a knack for hiding the truth of his emotions deep in his music, and I don’t think a straight-forward reading of the literal meaning of his lyrics will ever pick up on everything that he actually put into the song.

Brian wrote this song not too long after he married Chrissy. (I’m not sure on the exact dates here, but I think he married Chrissy in ‘76 and It’s Late was written probably in late summer of ‘77.) I have a very hard time believing that a recently-married Brian would be either oblivious, uncaring, or malicious enough to write a literal exploit of his cheating into a song that his new wife could end up hearing, and it makes more sense to me for the song to have more layers and be about other things as well rather than assume that Brian’s plan was just to make up another explanation for the song if asked about it.

We have exactly no evidence of Brian having a long-term, recurring affair with a single woman, which is very much what the superficial story of this song is about. (Before anyone starts arguing, “But Peaches!!” - It’s Late was written before Brian reconnected with her at the Jazz party in New Orleans.) So given that there’s obviously some level of fiction being worked into this song, I don’t think it’s a stretch to argue that even if Brian was drawing on his cheating for some of the emotion in the song there are more layers to it than just that.

SO. What else could the song (also) be about?

I would argue that another very valid interpretation of the song is Brian’s feelings of disconnect between his “normal” life and the life of a rockstar in Queen. Yes, I’m sure that includes the cheating, but I don’t think that’s all that Brian is talking about here.

Brian has said in different interviews that he struggled with being a husband and a father because he didn’t know what he was doing. He felt like he was letting his family down by not always being around, and also struggled to fit into a domestic life in the moments when he was home.

Bear in mind that Brian seems incapable of ever slowing down. Today he has multiple large-scale projects that he works on when he’s not actively touring with Queen, but he didn’t have these same sorts of outlets in the 70s and 80s. He didn’t have a private recording studio, he didn’t work with other artists to the same degree that he does now, he didn’t have the Save Me Trust, he wasn’t writing books… you get the idea. So it’s easy to see why he’d struggle to settle into a “normal” life in his moments of downtime, when day-to-day life with his family was so much quieter and calmer than he was used to dealing with.

The general theme of feeling disconnected from a “normal” life is also one that pops up multiple times in Brian’s songs. Like I said before, ‘39 is partially about Brian returning home from tour and feeling like an outsider in his old life. There’s also Leaving Home Ain’t Easy, which addresses the pull between domesticity and touring a little more obviously.

I would also argue that Sleeping on the Sidewalk (which is on the same album as It’s Late) also does this a little with the change from “I may get hungry but I sure don’t want go home” to “I sure do want to go home” in the last chorus. So it’s something that seems to have been on Brian’s mind, at least a little bit, at the same time that he was writing It’s Late.

Like I said before this is also not too long after Brian married Chrissy, and it’s only two years (and two albums) after A Night at the Opera when Queen is still continuing to reach new heights of superstardom. On some level, Brian may have been torn between wanting to marry Chrissy and worrying that he wouldn’t be “doing right” by her by constantly being in the studio or touring and not being around as they started a family together.

Also consider that Brian’s life up until this point has had a very sharp divide between the personal and the professional. Brian continued working on his doctorate thesis for years after Queen formed and only set it aside in 1974, at which point he had a falling-out with his father that was really only put to rest in February 1977 - literally only months before he would have written this song. It’s possible that Brian was feeling frustrated by the fact that he was only just now starting to balance these two parts of his life, and that whatever progress he made was slow and messy and, on some level, “not enough”.

And a lot of the lyrics could support this reading as well:

(Verse 1) And if I say I love you in the candlelight There's no one but myself to blame But there's something inside that's turning my mind away Oh, how I could love you If I could let you stay

Brian is in love with Chrissy, but feels guilty that he’s distracted by Queen affairs. He can tell her that he loves her “in the candlelight”, when they’re actually alone, but he always goes back to the band where Chrissy can’t follow or really “stay” with him.

(Verse 2) Oh, you know that I can love you Though I know I can't be true Oh, you made me love you Don't tell me that we're through

Brian loves being in Queen but he can’t be “true” to the band anymore because he has Chrissy and a future family to think about now. Also, consider the lyric: you made me love you. Brian was always a little reserved about Queen at first, as shown by how long it took him to drop his thesis and commit 100% to the band. But Queen “made [him] love [it]” and now he’s facing a change in the old status quo that he doesn’t know how to handle.

(Bridge) We've been so long trying to work it out

This isn’t a new problem for Brian. He’s been with Chrissy for years at this point and he’s been juggling life with her and life with Queen for most of that time. The difference now is how much the band has taken off over the last year or two and, as a result of that, the new struggles he’s had to face as his two lives diverge even more.

(Verse 3) You say what game are you playing? What's this that you're saying? I know that I can't reply If I take you tonight, is it making my life a lie? Oh, you make me wonder Did I live my life right?

Queen eventually has to go on tour again, and the parting isn’t easy. Chrissy may not be happy that he’s leaving, and Brian feels guilty for being with her in this moment when he’s about to leave her for the next few months. He wonders if he’s doing the right thing by splitting his life between Queen and his new family.

One other lyric that I want to highlight is from the first chorus where Brian asks, Is it just my sickly pride? That’s always struck me as a very strange line to put in a song if it was only supposed to be about cheating… but it kind of makes a lot of sense if it’s about Queen instead, and Brian is questioning whether he’s continuing down this path because he’s too proud to admit that he can’t keep splitting his life between Chrissy and Queen like he has been.

So. There’s that. A whole of lot of reasons why I think it makes more sense for It’s Late to have layers of meaning inside of being about only cheating and nothing but cheating, as well as what I think is another valid interpretation of the song.

-------------------------------------------

Also, if I may end this on a slightly different (and much angrier) note:

A lot of Queen songs have multiple layers of meaning and/or are about fictional (or semi-fictional) scenarios. There’s also songs written by John and Roger from when they were married that are clearly not about their wives but, for example, no one listens to “In Only Seven Days” and questions whether John was cheating on Veronica during that week (even though they all cheated - and I know some of you are gonna be angry at me for saying that, but it’s true and I’m not gonna get into debates about that). So it feels a little… weird, I suppose? To have people embrace the many meanings of Queen songs and the fantasies in them, but to limit It’s Late to a single one-dimensional interpretation.

I think it’s disrespectful to Brian to ignore everything that is beautiful in the music and lyrics of this song, and it’s incredibly disrespectful to Queen as a whole to imply that… what? They let Brian record a song explicitly about his cheating and nothing else for laughs? Or that they let themselves be bullied into including it on the album? Because, again, if this is only about Brian’s cheating, that would imply that everyone involved with this song beyond Brian heard it and didn’t point out the potential for Chrissy to be hurt by this - an issue that doesn’t exist, at least not to the same extent, if the others had plausible reasons to assume that the song had more depth to it than just that.

And while I can understand some of the jokes about this song, I think the fandom collectively has reached a point where it’s gone past plausibly funny and straight into hurtful. Ignoring all the shit that gets slung Brian’s way, I just don’t understand how so many people can rail against Brian’s cheating… and then immediately turn around and crack jokes about this song or Chrissy’s reaction to it, in a way that completely trivializes not only her experiences but the experiences of everyone who’s been cheated on.

So yeah. You don’t have to like the song, and I’m not even trying to claim that Brian’s cheating played no role in this. But limiting the song to a one-dimensional interpretation and then cracking endless “jokes”- or worse, using this song to try to draw conclusions about Brian’s or Chrissy’s actions or their relationship- is just a really shitty thing to do.

-------------------------------------------

(And one final note: I have zero interest in debating or discussing the morality of anyone’s cheating. Don’t use this post to springboard into conversations that are just about Brian’s cheating and not the song itself - make your own post if you want to talk about that, because I’m not hosting it here.

Also while I’m open to talking about other interpretations of this song if your argument is, “Brian cheated so It’s Late is about his cheating and nothing else!” I’m not having that debate with you.)

#brian #text #ramblings #fuck it here you go have at this #it's only 2k this time so I actually almost managed to rein myself in for once asdfgjkla

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adriennestar · 5 years

Text

Loved Endgame but... I'm gonna be that b*tch

I loved everything except Steve's ending. I will never be able to accept it and according to social media, I'm not the only one.

It's a slap in the face (actually more like an axe to the spine) to everything that Stucky has been through together in the MCU. All of their chemistry and feelings for each other that have been established are undeniably romantic and still stand. The Russos can't "Thanos" away "I'm with you till the end of the line" (ie "till death do us part") or that the only person Steve repeatedly goes to the ends of the earth for is Bucky, or that Stucky's story arc falls into many romantic tropes in the CA trilogy.

Evans said that Bucky is Steve's home and everything he needs while Seb has said that Bucky's relationship with Steve is probably the only thing keeping Bucky from killing himself. So in short, Bucky is everything Steve could ever need and Steve is Bucky's literal reason for living. Sounds pretty romantic.

In TWS, Steve goes on about his love life and wanting someone with "shared life experience" minutes before Bucky (his genetically enhanced super soldier ex, who has been frozen for a majority of the past 70 years, fought in ww2, and grew up in 1920s/1930's Brooklyn) shows up with just that.

Thor gives up the throne for Jane in Thor 2, Tony gives up his suits for Pepper in Iron man 3, and Steve gives up his shield for Bucky in Cap 2 AND 3.

"You're keeping the outfit right?"

"He left me for a damsel dark" (From the tavern scene in TFA when Bucky visibly is sad about Steve and Peggy)

"It's Been a Long Long Time" is still Stucky's song. It get's introduced with Stucky during their reunion scene in TWS.

"Even when I had nothing, I had Bucky"

"Your Bucky"

"Rumlow said Bucky and all of the sudden, I was a 16 year old kid again in Brooklyn". 16 is the stereotypical age (especially in fiction) people experience their first love and Steve without warning, reminisces about being that age upon hearing Bucky's name. He get's SO distracted that Rumlow is able to detonate a bomb in front on him.

Bucky is the only reason why Steve has EVER surrendered himself in battle.

In fiction, whenever a main character's love interest is captured, killed, etc, it becomes the main character's main motivation to save or avenge them. That is Stucky's entire story arc in Cap's trilogy.

1. Steve opposes 117 countries, for Bucky.

2. Steve fights half of his friends, the avengers, for Bucky.

3. Steve fights Tony practically to the death, for Bucky.

4. Steve would rather die by letting Bucky kill him than fight Bucky.

5. Steve single handedly storming that hydra base to save Bucky is the same energy as an old fashioned Disney prince, storming a castle and slaying a dragon to save the princess. (Not even joking)

6. Steve before he loses Bucky in TFA doesn't want to kill anyone but as soon he does lose Bucky he wants all of Hydra dead or captured.

Cap pulls a helicopter out of the sky with his bare hands to keep Bucky with him.

The images below are tweets by the writer for CA:CW

Did anyone else notice when Endgame Steve encountered his Avengers self, the 2012 Steve had the same reaction to seeing Steve's compass and hearing about Bucky still being alive? Because I did lol.

Picture either Steve or Bucky as a woman and then all of the sudden, even the most heteronormative minded people can acknowledge how immensely romantic Stucky's story arc is.

Over the years, Marvel sets up all of this romantic subtext/chemistry between Stucky, literally say Steve and Bucky are soul mates, then they shove a heteronormative end that goes against Steve's character/character growth down our throats.

They even add insult to injury by giving us a dry and lifeless Stucky scene before Steve goes back in time. The Ned/Peter and Tony/Peter reunion were 100 times more emotional than Stucky's. I feel like the Russo brother's intentionally drained the life out of Stucky's reunion scene while directing it by telling the actors to act as hollow and uninterested as possible because they're trying so hard to bury Stucky alive in a shallow grave.

Deep down I always knew they didn't have the spine to explicitly represent Stucky as the canon romantic couple they were in the MCU but Stucky is still real. They're just not OPENLY lgbt.

Speaking of the openly gay character in Endgame... thanks alot Russos 😧🙄. Thanks for throwing us some scraps on the floor when it comes to explicit representation while the cis/het's get to enjoy yet another banquet.

The MCU prior to Endgame has done nothing but heavily hint that Steve and Bucky are the love of each other's life and now they turn around and say "haha heteronormativity ftw". Stucky is a broken promise.

But I'm not giving up on Stucky. They are canonically lgbt just like Valkyrie(bi) and Loki(pan) even though they too didn't get explicit representation.

I guess I'm just going to stay mad about this forever. Someone has to. Stucky deserved better than to go out in such an insulting way.

Peggy may be "the love of Steve's life" but Stucky were each other's first love back in the 1930's. "The first cut is always the deepest" is the notion that your first love will forever define your perception of love. Maybe that's why the very next person after Bucky Steve finds himself attracted to is essentially the female version of his first love.

Bucky and Peggy are virtually the same person, just of the opposite sex. They are both brave, intelligent, strong, capable, compassionate, good looking, sharp shooting, army brunettes, who hate bullies. They even get introduced by beating up a bully while sporting their army clothes. You just can't make this sh*t up!

You can have it both ways. Maybe one day Marvel will understand that.

My hopes are lower than the bottom of the Mariana trench when it comes to that though.

Rant over. Bye.

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