#anyway i need to stop i've been thinking about this shit all summer and it's probably not good for meee lol
Text
It's just a hobby. (Drabble)
Summary: You took up a new hobby, and Dean likes to poke and tease you for it, but you feel the need to seek a little revenge for the constant joking.
Pairing: Dean Winchester x Reader
Word Count: 3300+
A/N: I started this during the summer when I started five different crocheting projects (ADHD carried my summer hobbies) and decided to finish it before school started back up. I am currently still writing Found Memories, but I have to put a pause on it as the first month of school tends to take a lot of my time away from hobbies like writing… I’m moving to teach 8th-grade English this year and could use all the energy you’re all willing to send my way! Anyway, I hope you enjoy this short story, and I’m happy to have the inspiration to write for Dean again :)
(Also, this is the closest to smut I think I've ever written...)
_______
“Seriously?” Dean grumbled as he looked in the rearview mirror seeing me pulling yarn to untangle a knot I had created.
Knowing where he was going with his normal banter, I just laughed and continued to focus on the craft in front of me.
“I pulled this out like 20 minutes ago. How are you just now noticing?”
“I’m watching the road,” he argued, and I rolled my eyes. As always, he had been sneaking glances to the back of the cab at me every other minute. “The hunt wasn’t even 40 minutes away from the bunker. Why did you bring that?”
“Why do you listen to the same three Led Zeppelin songs when you're upset about a hunt?” I countered, and he opened his mouth to disagree, but I answered for him to skip the sarcastic conversation brewing. “Comfort Dean. It’s all about comfort.”
“Why are you so weirded out by a normal hobby?” Sam jumped in, smirking, and sporting one of the many beanies I had made him with said hobby, which he had come to love. He looked down at a newspaper in his lap, no doubt already scoping out a new hunt.
“It’s not-” Dean stumbled on his answer. “I’m not weirded out by it. It’s just not a hobby I imagine someone like Y/N taking up.”
“You just described why you’re weirded out by it,” Sam looked at him with a blank stare.
He ignored him and rolled his eyes.
“What kind of people do you imagine the crocheting community to be full of?” I smiled, still looking down at my hands and knowing his answer already.
“Grandmas,” he replied almost immediately.
“Hmm,” I hummed as if surprised by his confession, even if it was wrong. “Well, if that’s the case, I’ll stop wasting my talents on things for you.”
I could see his eyes shoot up in the mirror and a look of regret ghost over his green orbs.
Dean liked to make a big deal about this particular hobby I had started up a little over six months ago. I think a part of him just liked to tease me about it, but deep down, I knew he was proud of my growth. He was just bad at voicing it.
The first things I ever crocheted were just simple squares in different stitch work to learn a variety of them better. Those squares became washcloths and, surprisingly, were still used daily in the kitchen.
I learned to make bags, socks, hats, sweaters, stuffed animals, and even a few blankets.
“Just 30 minutes ago, you took down five security guards, wrestled three teenage vampires, and booby-trapped half of his nest. Now you’re crocheting a sweater for Charlie that says, ‘What’s up bitches?’ in the backseat. Mind you, with blood still smeared on your face,” he raised an eyebrow at me in the mirror.
I looked up and leaned toward the front to get a better look at myself.
“Oh, shit, I thought I got it all,” I groaned, seeing a smear on the side of my face I must have missed.
“It doesn’t add up,” he shook his head, but I could see a joking smile on his lips.
“Much to your surprise Dean, girls can have more than one personality trait. I know you boys are all, ‘Ugh, monsters! Kill, kill, kill! I need a scotch in my hand and The God Father playing on loop in the background to show how manly I-’
“Hey,” Sam cut me off and looked at me with his sad puppy dog eyes. “I’m on your side.”
“You’re right… You also like to read and share fun facts,” I winked, touseling his hair and getting a scoff of a laugh as he swatted my hand away. “See how hurtful it can be when you forget our brains have the capacity to do more than one thing?” I turned back to Dean with my arms crossed on the bench seat in front of me.
“I don’t think you're incapable of having more than one interest in life; I just think it’s interesting that you chose a 90-year-old women's side gig as your hobby,” Dean countered, pulling into the garage.
“Well, if you can’t appreciate it, then you can’t have the gifts my hard work creates,” I huffed, gathering my things and sliding back to the door as Dean parked the car.
Once the car was in park, I was the first out. I wasn’t actually mad at him, I was a hundred percent messing with him, but he deserved it for teasing me this long about it when I knew he loved everything I had made him this far.
He had a favorite blanket that he preferred to sleep with now. He had a nice sweater he wore around the bunker when he was cold. He had a few pairs of socks he preferred over store-bought ones. He even had a miniature plush Batman figurine that sat on his desk that I had learned to crochet just for him.
“Y/N, you don’t mean that!” he called after me, standing in the door on the driver's side of the Impala and shouting over the roof of it where I was walking inside.
“We'll find out soon,” I yelled back, never turning around.
The next three days, I teased him like he had me about this whole ordeal, but in my own way.
When we were cooking in the kitchen or doing dishes, if he grabbed one of the squares that now acted as our kitchen hand towels, I would steal it from his hands and say, “Sorry, merchandise can only be used by those who value it.”
With which he would respond, “Wait! I need that!” with his hands drenched in water after washing his hands.
Just for extra measure, I took all the towels and moved them to a new place only Sam and I knew. He was happy to join in on my little prank, and every time he had one, he made sure Dean saw him with it.
“Where did you get that?” Dean would jump up from wherever he was and march over to him to try and steal it.
“Only the VIP customers have access to these,” Sam would wave it above his head out of reach of Dean.
Another time, after a hunt, it was freezing in our motel room, where the heater barely worked, and the hotel didn't have enough blankets. Luckily I had one packed in the trunk of Baby, and I used it for extra coverage.
Even though Dean and I shared a bed, I wrapped it around me as I slept and said, “Sucks that you hate this so much, or else I’d share with you…”
He stared at me with complete annoyance when I gave him an exaggerated “Oh well” face before stealing it all for myself.
I did, however, wake up to sharing it, but only because he had stolen it, and I was too tired to fight him about it.
I think one of my favorite times I rebuked him of his privileges was when he was wearing a pair of socks I had made him for Christmas around the house. I may have gotten a little more intense than I needed to, but the look on his face made it worth it.
He had come into the movie room to binge a few episodes of a new series I got him hooked on, and after he called me in to watch with him, I noticed the specific socks he had on.
I grinned once my brain had formulated a plan to make him regret ever giving me hell for a hobby he obviously loved himself.
“Claire said there was a show called Love Island we should watch. I have no clue what it’s about, but she said it was popular and what the kids are watching now,” Dean conversed as he grabbed the remote from the table and stood with a blanket (not one of mine, as I had relocated all of them so he couldn’t find them) around his shoulders.
He was in the perfect position for my plan.
I walked over and, instead of facing the TV, stood right in front of him and looked up at him.
“You know what we could do?” I whispered in a low and sultry voice, bringing my hand up to his chest and inching my fingers up to the collar of his t-shirt before pulling at it gently. His eyes instantly darkened, and he was frozen in his place.
“Wh-What, uh, what can we do?” he stammered out. Even after three years of dating, he still got nervous. I loved it.
“I think you know what,” I said, tiptoeing upward to quietly say in his ear, bringing my hand from his chest to the back of his neck, softly pulling him closer to me.
“I think I have an idea,” he replied more confidently, immediately bringing his free hand to my waist and squeezing it.
I could have faltered there, but I held strong. I was going to make him pay for all his little ‘grandma’ jokes he had sent my way the last few months.
I pulled back, sending him a smirk that I knew revved him up. He returned it with his own and started leaning down, forgetting his grip on the blanket and remote. Now both of his hands sat on my hips with a stronghold.
Before he could lean down any further, I pushed him backward harshly on the couch, and at first, he was shocked, then he was excited.
Slouched into the cushion, looking up at me, his tongue came out to lick his lips and ended with a bite to his lower lip as he eyed me up and down as I stood over him.
“Dear God, Y/N,” he hummed under his breath.
I guess it helped that I was wearing some of my shorter PJ shorts, ones he had told me were his favorites, and a shirt that was cropped and slightly falling off my shoulder.
He had a thing for me being in a disheveled manner like this. Reminded him of how I looked after we fucked around, and he held pride knowing he played a part in the kind of glow I gave off.
I wasn’t sure how long I could do this without failing myself on the original mission. I came here to fuck with him, and now he was the fucker. Or at least he was going to be if I didn’t follow through with my plan in the next minute.
“You know, you should be happy you were by the couch,” I smiled, stepping to him and strategically bringing my legs to straddle his hips teasingly.
His breath hitched at that, and I knew I had regained the upper hand.
“Oh yeah? Why’s that?” he hummed as he admired my hands pressing into his chest as I leaned in, bringing myself closer to him.
“I was about to take you wherever I found you,” I whispered, looking him dead in the eyes with a soft smile. I looked him up and down and bit the inside of my cheek. That seemed to trigger his hands back to my hips instantly. This time a much more possessive lock on them.
“I don’t know where this is coming from, but I can’t complain,” he said lowly, and I knew he was hooked. Now it was time for revenge.
“Can I ask you a question?” I hummed, running my finger lightly over his hair down to his jaw, using the tip of it to push his chin up so I could see his eyes better.
“Please,” he buzzed, drunk with lust.
“Hmm,” I hummed, smiling more, dropping my gaze to his lips, then back at his eyes where he was drowning in dopamine by our current position. “Those socks you have on?” He didn’t catch on immediately and just furrowed his eyes as he processed what I asked. “They look familiar.”
I leaned back from my seat, still straddling his hips, but not with nearly as much pressure as before.
“What-” Dean started, but it dawned on him mid-thought. His eyes went from ready to tear my clothes off to annoyed realization. “Seriously.”
“What?” I feigned ignorance and stood up, repositioning myself between his legs, both hands on his knees as I looked at him and leaned over.
He couldn’t tell which way this was going for him, and that was the point. I was still winning this little game.
I eased myself lower, squatting with my knees going into the couch and in between his thighs. My hands went flat on his knees and slowly started working up his thighs.
“I can’t tell what you’re doing here, Y/N,” he said in a breathy voice. I watched as he tried to control himself, looking up away from me but not being able to help react to my hands on him.
“I’m not doing anything,” I said in a voice that made him lower his nervous wandering eyes back to me. The amount of green in his eyes disappeared slowly.
“You’re teasing me,” he said shortly as if he was worried his voice would tremble if he didn’t get it out quickly.
“Maybe, maybe not,” I shrugged with a pursed lip before bringing my hands slowly back down his legs.
“You’re mad at me,” he stuttered the last word when my hands worked their way back up, but further up than before.
“Now, why would you think that?” I tutted, shaking my head with an exaggerated look of hurt.
All he could do was take a slow, deep breath in as I tilted my head and smiled devilishly at him.
“Don’t.”
“Don’t what?”
“Don’t play innocent.”
I grinned.
“You and I both know I’m far from that…” My tone was darker than before but in a seductive and tempting manner.
He couldn’t hold back anymore. He shot up from his slouched position and leaned forward, grabbing my forearms in his hands and pulling me up in his lap with his nose mere inches from my own.
“If your goal was to make me suffer, you won,” he whispered so quietly; if I wasn't this close, I wouldn't have heard it. He tilted his head up just enough for our noses to brush before pulling back.
“Keep it together, girl… Keep it fucking together,” I repeated in my head.
“Did I? Or am I just getting started?” I snarked, and that caused the new grip on my thigh to tighten, and I almost groaned at the pressure.
“Don’t start a war you can’t win,” he smirked, feeling as though he possessed the power.
Two can play that game.
I smiled, bringing my free hand up and tracing it behind his ear before wrapping it slowly around the back of his neck. I brought his face closer to mine but stopped right when I could feel the brush of his lips.
Our chests were pressed into each other, and I could feel his heart rate pick up. Perfect.
I nudged our noses again and smiled as his eyes closed, and he naturally and lazily chased my lips.
I rocked my hips in a measured manner, placed perfectly in the middle of his lap, and he sucked in a breath at the friction.
“Women don’t start wars. They finish them,” I whispered before promptly standing up and, in a swift motion, yanking the socks he had on off and walking to the exit.
“Y/N!” I could hear his shout from the couch from where I knew he was with a full hard-on, unable to move just yet.
“This granny is going to bed!” I shouted, speed-walking to my room in case he decided to run after me.
“You little-!” the shout still seemed far behind me, and I quickly shut my bedroom door and locked it.
Thankfully, I think I left him incapacitated for a second, and he didn’t follow me immediately.
I actually didn’t hear from him for the rest of the night. I hoped I didn’t upset him, but also, the whole reason I had done what I had was because he had become a little ass about my favorite hobby. I don’t mind the jokes, but after a while, you want a pat on the back for learning something new. Especially from someone you care about.
I went ahead and did my normal nighttime routine and got into bed before I started to read a book. I must have dozed off while reading because I woke up to the lights out, my book on the end table, and Dean crawling into the other side of the bed.
Before I could say anything, his arms came around my waist, and he pulled me to his core. He was in his boxers and one of his soft t-shirts I made him wear to bed.
For the record, I was perfectly fine with him in no shirt (or pants, for that matter), but when he did wear a shirt, I made him put on a certain kind cause his band and certain graphic tee ones were itchy on me when we cuddled.
He took a deep sigh and nuzzled his face into the crevice between my neck and shoulder, one of his favorite places.
“Why’d you lock your door?” he asked, already knowing I had woken up.
He had definitely picked the lock.
“I thought you were going to hunt me down, and I forgot to unlock it,” I replied sleepily.
There was silence for a minute, and eventually, he spoke up, whispering in my ear his apology.
“I’m sorry.”
“Why?” I sighed with a winning grin he couldn't see, knowing why but playing coy anyway.
“I’m sorry I haven’t told you how much I appreciate your brain,” he answered.
That was not what I expected, but I was intrigued.
“Hmmm,” I smiled, moving my hands to his that were wrapped around my ribs and nuzzling my backside closer to him. “Don’t stop now; you’re on a roll.”
He laughed and invited my attempt to fit into him like a puzzle piece.
“You’re ambitious with everything you want to learn to do, and I don’t tell you enough how much of a turn-on that is,” he hummed, rubbing his head into mine and peppering a kiss on my neck here and there. “And I know you know how much I love the skills you gain, but sometimes I’m bad about just saying how impressive you are to me.”
“You like my crocheting skills, Winchester,” I chuckled, turning my body to face him now and throwing one of my legs over his hips, pulling back in some. “Just say it.”
“I love your crocheting skills,” he replied with a wide grin and brought a hand up to move the stray hairs that fell on my face. “I love your baking and cooking. I love your impressive TV show-binging skills. I love the random facts you have stored in that beautiful brain of yours. I love your surprisingly nerdy side of Marvel and superheroes. I love your attempt at being a gardener.”
“Hey, I have three plants that are thriving right now!” I argued, poking a finger in his chest, which he grabbed and kissed the tip of.
“I love everything you’re passionate about,” he finished off. “I don’t tell you enough, and sometimes I like to see that face you give me when I tease you.” I gave him a look. “Maybe more than sometimes… But! I do love all those things and more about you, Y/N.”
“I don’t doubt it,” I replied, scooting in closer. “But it is nice to hear it from those captivating lips of yours.”
“Yeah?”
“Yeah.”
We started smiling at each other, and I couldn’t help but feel a little guilty about earlier.
“I’m sorry I teased you,” I sighed, moving to where I was embedded in his chest, and he wrapped himself back around me.
“Don’t be. I deserved it,” he replied, chin on my head before he bent down and kissed the top of it. “I will say, though, I’ve never been mad about seeing that side of you.”
“What side?” I looked up at him.
“Don’t act like you didn’t know what you were doing,” he chuckled, pulling my head back to him.
“Yeah, you’re right,” I agreed after a minute. “Hey.”
“Hm?”
“You’re my favorite person. You know that, right?”
“Feelings are very much mutual,” he answered, caressing a hand up and down my back.
“Good. I’d have to kill you with one of my knitting needles if you said otherwise. Who said needleworking wasn’t dangerous, right?”
My Lovelies Forever:
@natura1phenomenon @lauravicente @kakakatey @traceyaudette @notyourtypicalrose @laneygthememequeen @awesome-badass-cafeteria-sauce @sandlee44 @thorne93 @thefaithfulwriter @marvelfansworld @essie1876 @greyeyedsmile14 @capsiclehan @xostephanie @averyrogers83 @awesomenursingstudent @gh0stgurl @cs-please @carls1022 @jjlevin @rainbowkisses31 @carls1022 @anise-d-castle6 @deannotmoose @their-bibliophile @kitkatd7 @willowbleedsonpaper @mariaenchanted @snffbeebee @couldabeenamermaid @rebekahdawkins @alyispunk @drakelover78 @caruhleener
Supernatural Tags:
@flamencodiva @hobby27 @sucker-for-dean @deans-baby-momma @squirrelgirl67 @death-unbecomes-you @snffbeebee @jerkbitchidjitassbutt @spnbaby-67 @akshi8278 @musiclovinchic93 @vicmc624 @carryon-doctor-lock @perpetualabsurdity @herscrunchiehairtie @spnwoman @shamelesslydean @monkeymcpoopoo @winchestergirl82 @luciathewinchestergirl @deansyahtzee @thatgirl1456 @sucker-for-dean @atomicloverdonkeyperson @screechingartisancashbailiff @akshi8278 @supernatural3002
#dean winchester#dean winchester x reader#dean winchester x reader drabble#dean winchester drabble#justkending#spn fanfic#dean winchester spn#dean winchester x you#spn dean winchester#drabble#spn drabble
529 notes
·
View notes
Text
Type A
Caroline Forbes x Reader
Masterlist - Join My Taglist!
Written for Fictober 2023!
Fandom: The Vampire Diaries
Day 29 Prompt: "That's all? Easy."
Summary: Caroline is a little overwhelmed by the amount of things that need to happen to open the Salvatore Boarding School for its first year of operation, but her SO is there to help her through.
Word Count: 1,056
Category: Fluff
A/N: Disclaimer, I haven't seen Legacies
Putting work into an AI program without permission is illegal. You do not have my permission. Do not do it.
"Oh. My. God."
I poked my head into the living room cautiously at the sound of my girlfriend's voice. I recognized her tone as the 'something has gone disastrously wrong and I'm about to have a meltdown' tone. I'd run to the kitchen to get coffee for both of us, and apparently in that short amount of time we'd encountered a new problem. To be fair, worse things had definitely happened in less time to us before.
"Babe?" I asked, taking a few more steps into the room. Caroline Forbes, my girlfriend and the love of my life, looked up at me, clipboard in hand and distress written all over her face. "What happened?"
"Ugh, the Salvatores happened!" she cried, throwing her hands up in the air. "I'm pretty sure they spent the past hundred years compelling anybody involved with this house, and now that new people are responsible for billing things like electric, water, gas, and whatever else you can think of, I have to deal with them all at once! And that's not even mentioning the home inspectors. And I still have to organize all the heirlooms they left laying around, just waiting to be broken. Or the fact that not a single bedroom in this place looks remotely like something a kid would enjoy living in-"
"Caroline." I'd set down our coffee mugs and now held up my hands as I slowly approached my girlfriend, stopping her spiral before it could go any further. "Take a breath, babe."
"Take a breath?" she cried, her voice actually going up an octave. "I still have to make decisions about our first class, find teachers, figure out curriculum, make sure the house is actually safe, and a thousand other things before we can open our doors, which we're supposed to be doing at the end of the summer?"
"Pft. That's all? Easy."
Caroline scoffed, her eyes practically glowing as a murderous expression spread across her face. If I didn't know her so well, I might've been worried for my safety. Instead, I closed the rest of the remaining distance between us, putting my hands on her shoulders and looking her right in the eye.
"Listen to me, right now. You are Caroline Motherfucking Forbes. You do event planning in your sleep, and I know that's a true statement, because I've heard it. This shit is right up your alley! Yeah, it's gonna be a challenge, and a lot of vampires with lazy habits are going to make it harder. But you love challenges! I've quite literally never seen you happier than when you're taking charge in the middle of chaos and pulling it all together. And we went to Paris for your birthday."
Caroline huffed and rolled her eyes, but I caught her smiling anyway. I grinned back at her, giving her shoulders a gentle shake.
"You are a force of nature, and there is literally no future where you don't pull this off. I'm not a witch, but I know it doesn't exist. Besides, you're not doing any of it alone. I'm here with you, and so are our friends. We're gonna help you every step of the way to get this school up and running. And we're gonna help you when a kid inevitably breaks some precious historic heirloom, and one of them brings home a curse from touching something they should've left alone, and every other situation you can possibly think of. We'll be here for you to lean on."
Caroline smiled. She took a deep breath, then pursed her lips and nodded, more determined than frazzled now.
"You're right. I am Caroline Forbes, and no centuries-long problem the Salvatores refused to deal with is going to get the best of me."
"Damn right."
She laughed a little, then leaned in to kiss me. We broke apart fairly quickly, since we did have quite a few things left to do, but it was enough to have a warm glow working its way through my chest.
I turned to retrieve our coffee mugs, offering Caroline's to her. Thankfully, they were still warm, and she took hers with one hand, picking up a clipboard with the other. Her eyes scanned the page for a few minutes with a critical eye. I just sipped my coffee and waited, knowing I'd need all the energy I could muster for whatever was about to come next.
"Okay... the bills are easy enough to deal with, so I'll get online and set up autopay for that. In the mean time, you're on heirloom duty. Find anything we don't want in the line of fire for kids practicing their supernatural abilities and put it in the attic."
"Yes ma'am," I said, saluting. Caroline rolled her eyes with a smile.
We started off to do our tasks, but I stopped short before leaving the room. Caroline was already buried in a task, but I took the risk of interrupting her.
"Care?"
"Hm?"
"If we get this done today... any chance we can play interior decorator for our task tomorrow?"
"Sure!" She turned around with a bright smile, a slight edge to it that I recognized and that made me immediately nervous. "And then we can deep clean all the other parts of this house that haven't been touched in years."
I groaned. "Do we have to? Can't we hire a cleaning company to deal with that?"
"Not when vampire speed will get it done at least twice as fast."
"But Caroline, there might be spiders." She crossed her arms, and I realized I was not going to win this fight. I sighed dramatically, turning to go back to the task I'd originally been on my way to do. "Fine, but if I see a spider, I'm screaming and I'm making you deal with it."
"You're an immortal vampire with super speed and super strength!"
"Yeah, and I still hate spiders!"
Her laughter echoed in the room and hallway behind me, and I smiled to myself. I loved that crazy blonde tornado of a girl, and although I complained sometimes and would continue to do so, I'd also follow her to the ends of the earth with a smile.
****************
Everything Taglist: @rosecentury
TVD/TO Taglist: @elenavampire21
#fictober23#the vampire diaries#caroline forbes#caroline forbes x reader#the vampire diaries fanfiction#the vampire diaries imagine#the vampire diaries oneshot#caroline forbes fanfiction#caroline forbes imagine#caroline forbes oneshot#tvd#the salvatore boarding school for the young and gifted#the salvatore boarding school#vampires#the vampire diaries x reader#the salvatores#the salvatore brothers#legacies#post tvd#tvdu
60 notes
·
View notes
Note
Hi! I know you're probably busy rn with collage and what not and I totally understand if you can't expand on this but either way, god I just need to rant about this thought.
So I just saw this tik tok where this girl was like "when I'm riding passenger princess and we're getting a little to close to the car in front of us" and the audio was like "the question is when are you gonna START stopping?"
And one of the comments said she wasn't a passenger princess she was a anxious passenger patroller and all that had me thinking of was Stu and reader, like I don't know about everyone else but i canon whole heartily Stu is a great driver who drives recklessly because 1)he knows what he's doing and 2) he thinks the shits funny
And I believe he'd do it especially to reader when he gets in those weird moods when he doesn't know how to feel about the reader/doesn't know how to handle it, and it kinda just serfaces in this weird aggression . Idk it could be like a fight-ish thing and she's telling him to slow down and he's being a dick about and in the end he weasels his way back into her good graces because she won't speak to him first if he's wrong and he doesn't like going to long with out talking to her
I don't know what up with my mind and how it wonders, anywho hope you have a good day/night :)
a/n for sure busy with school and actually having a social life for once and writing but always always always have time for billy and/or stu (especially since i'm kind of stuck on final girl rn😭)
YOU ARE SO RIGHT,, like i don't think he'd drive recklessly to scare reader with the intention of putting reader or himself in a dangerous situation,, but he'd for sure find it funny or see it as a way to "humble" reader a bit, like if Stu felt like the reader was acting too detached or into someone else he's suddenly speeding a little more just so that reader has to grip his arm and squeeze his hand
anyway i've been missing them and super happy to have a lower stakes way to talk about them,, also this turned out a little different and fluffier than i expected it to be lol
----
Something about the commercial feels different in the fall. Cliche radio hits are easier during the summer, sometimes even fun. But during autumn, with leaves melting off trees in hues of red and orange and the looming end of the year nostalgia, the synthetic quality is harder to look past.
That's why your hand instinctually gravitates to the radio, switching the station without a second thought.
Stu sighs, a quick, over exaggerated puff of air. "I liked that one."
You glance in his direction, glaring, "You were barely listening."
Even though you're mainly defending yourself out of habit, you know it's true. Stu's pretty open about what he likes, even when he doesn't realize it. Usually, when he likes a song he'll tap his fingers against the steering wheel. If he really likes something, he'll even get into it in a way that definitely lessens his ability to control the car.
"I was, too," he hums, half pouting.
You roll your eyes before looking back out the window. The world is moving past you in a vague blur. So quick a seed of unease plants itself in your stomach. You wouldn't exactly call it worry, you've been hanging with Stu and getting him to drive you around too long for his casual take on driving to overly phase you. With the exception of him doing something particularly risky like throwing himself into another lane after barely checking or taking too sharp of a left turn because of yellow light.
Sometimes you comment on it, equal parts teasing and annoyed. But usually, it's easier to just accept it. Stu's so comfortable with the way he drives that comments only amuse him. The one time you glared at him and asked him to slow down, he had a made a game of switching lanes at the last possible second.
"You liked that Spice Girls song more."
Stu openly snaps his head away from the road to glare at you. "Did not, you're the one that likes that saturated pop stuff."
"I said I liked one song one time."
He sighs, finally turning back to face the windshield. "Sure..." He tugs on the last syllable, dragging it out to make his disbelief clear. "You wanna stop for ice cream?"
It's not exactly late, but later than you planned on staying out. Time seems to slip away too quickly when you and your usual group are together and this afternoon's movie that ended in a hangout at the mall had eaten even more time than expected. There was something extra entertaining about wandering between stores and only occasionally actually looking at clothes.
You do have homework and it is Sunday and you told your mom you'd be back around 6:00 probably and it's now almost 7:00. But ice cream does sound nice and there will only be so many evenings in your life that feel this warm and lighthearted.
"I have some homework," you mumble in one final attempt to convince yourself, "But, yeah, I could go for ice cream."
Stu nods, tapping his pointer finger against the wheel. "We'll be fast."
The yellow light doesn't affect his speed as he turns left. Your fingers press into the side of your seat. Fast. No kidding.
"You okay there, babe?" Okay, there's no way your expression was bad enough to warrant a question (especially when he should be looking at the road). He has to be baiting you. "You're looking a little green."
You force your hand to relax, "Mhm." And it is fine. At the very least, fine enough because Stu always drives like this. "Used to you driving like you're on the run."
"You're just sensitive."
The comment is more dismissive than teasing and for whatever reason, you like it less than when he makes fun of you. At least his bullying is coated in a distinct type of affection that only Stu can get away with.
You briefly consider starting one of your 'am not, are too' fights. You're definitely not above it, especially when you two are alone and no one's around to call you out for being overly childish. But if he's going to be moody over the smallest comment...
He switches lanes--without using his blinker--with a sharp turn of the wheel. "If it's that bad, you could get rides from someone else."
The comment is hard and too casual to be a threat, but still mean. It makes your stomach drop more than the way Stu maneuvers the car. You didn't say he was that bad of a driver and you definitely didn't say anything about not going out with him anymore.
There are a lot of good things about getting Stu to drive you around. You like being in his space and the music that's more often than not just a little too loud and the passenger seat that feels more like your seat. You also like the unplanned for car moments, the accidental gossip sessions in driveways and parking lots. It's part of the reason you're glad you don't have a license yet...it's an excuse to just be around him.
"I didn't--"
"Bet Randy would put up with your backseat driving." The car speeds up slightly. "He'd slow down if you gave him that look."
You frown, ruining any chance you have at arguing that that you don't have a face. You don't get what his issue is, especially with bringing up Randy. He's been making on and off comments since the movie you all watched ended.
You don't fully get it, but you guess you get Stu being a little annoyed. Randy and you had been a little obnoxious, laughing too hard at jump scares and flinching too dramatically at moments that weren't that bad. But it's not like you two were terrible. Definitely not bad enough to warrant this passive aggression.
"I don't want to drive around with Randy, I want to drive around with you." You're full on pouting and you don't even care.
Stu sighs, eyes avoiding yours in the rearview mirror. An uncomfortable warmth settles against his face. How do you always manage to do that? From anyone else, he'd hate it, but you're never trying to get anything out of it. Things like that are just offhanded comments to you. No ulterior motives. You don't even think twice about it.
"So now it's not enough enough to be driven around by anyone?"
You shrug, relaxing into your seat. "I'm spoiled."
His throat feels dry, a wave of uncomfortable fondness hitting him with no warning. He knows there's some joke he should make about how you're shameless about it, too. But he's too caught up on the amount of feeling tightening his chest.
He turns into parking lot of your usual drive-in ice cream spot.
"You're enabled."
You turn your head, smiling, "And you're the enabler."
Stu grins, moving a hand to squeeze your shoulder. "I'll enable you any time, babe."
You roll your eyes, but don't make any move to shake him off. "Enable me a--"
"Mint chocolate chip in a waffle--not sugar--cone." He recites your usual order without a second thought.
You nod once in approval. "This is why you're my favorite."
"I'm telling Billy you said that."
Scratching the back of your arm, you glare. Stu's always trying to start a fight with that. "Do not start."
He grins teasingly, "Start what?"
You glare, hoping that the look is threatening enough to make him promise to leave your comment behind. You've known Stu long enough to know that he'd happily take a you're my favorite and save it until he could use it as some sort of ammunition, exaggerating it to make sure it really hits. All that does is make him smile more. Before you can say anything else about it, Stu rolls down the window and orders.
When you get to the window, you try to pay for your own, but that ends as it usually does. He never lets you pay for anything, and when you threaten to leave cash in his car, he threatens to buy you even more things. Try it and on Monday I'm picking you up with coffee and a muffin and that new CD you were talking about. ...A lot of the times, the suggestion makes you want to stop for coffee and muffins before school anyway, so you end up getting it with him anyway.
You give in early this time, thanking him for the ice cream as he finds an empty spot to park in. You smile to yourself. Parked car time with Stu is something you enjoy a lot more than you'd ever admit. The two of you have a silent understanding that in these moments you can say things you wouldn't usually be able to say out loud. Nothing terribly cruel, just a little snarky. The kind of comments that'd get you in trouble in front of the wrong people.
Usually, you have to take the lead at first because Stu likes to act like he's too good for gossip, but once he gets started, he's worse than you.
You're still debating which of the two major topics--rumors you've heard about Susan Welch being pregnant and the weird way Madison Meyer has been acting--to bring up first when Stu breaks the silence. "You uh--" Stu cuts himself off. "You know I wouldn't--I wouldn't do anything that'd hurt you like that."
Weirdly deep comment to hear while you're holding an ice cream cone. "...Are you trying to convince me you didn't poison my ice cream?" That strange seriousness of his doesn't go away. You frown. "Yeah, come on, of course I know that."
He nods, "Yeah, just--" Stu won't look at you. "I wouldn't, and just--the car thing--"
"Stu." You've made those kinds of comments before, and it's never made him react like this. "I know that." You nudge his forearm gently. "I didn't mean it like."" He doesn't cheer up. "Seriously, if I thought you were trying to reverse-vehicular-manslaughter me, I wouldn't get in the car."
At that, he lets out a breath that's definitely trying not to be a laugh. "Would that be reverse-vehicular-manslaughter?"
"I don't know," you hum casually, pausing to eat some of your ice cream, "You're the one trying to do it." Stu glares; you grin. "Kidding." You bite off the top edge of your cone. "You know I love driving around with you--we listen to music, we talk, we gossip--"
"I don't gossip, you gossip and I let you."
You shake your head, not bringing up the fact that he always has more stuff worth saying than you do and he's snarkier than anyone would ever guess. "Then I guess I won't tell you what's up with Susan Welch."
To be fully honest, Stu couldn't care less about Susan Welch, but he likes the way you react to these sort of things. Your reactions to his side comments might be his favorite part of these moments. "She's...in our english class right?"
"Mhm," you hum, trying to downplay your excitement, "Remember how she had to leave class early the other day--like, practically ran out of the room to throw up?" You don't wait for him to respond, "That was on square pizza day--which is the day that's least likely to make someone throw up." You pause for the sake of your ice cream. "And Lucy Thompson swears Susan randomly stopped drinking, which if you've met her, makes no sense. So, Lucy thinks Susan might be..." You trail off before vaguely gesture to your stomach.
Stu's eyes narrow as he pretends to really think about what you've just said. "I don't know if that's enough to mean she's knocked up."
You shake your head once, "Lucy also said she's never in cheer practice anymore, and she started wearing baggy clothes." You sit up a little straighter, "And Missy Danes swears her older sister's friend saw Susan buying a pregnancy test in a grocery store two towns over. I know it's not proof, but it's definitely worth thinking about."
He widens his eyes, more for your sake than anything else, "Definitely." He pushes his spoon into his melting ice cream. "If she is pregnant, she's totally screwed because Ben Johnson was just bragging about hooking up with her."
Your mouth falls open in pretend shock, "No way." You lean against the center console. "You got oreo again, right?"
Stu knows exactly what that question means, "Want some?"
Your eyebrows draw together as you shake your head. "No, I'm--"
"We could trade for a little."
Another one of your traditions, each person's ice cream slowly becoming everyone's. "Another reason why you're my favorite."
"Oh, now you're begging me to tell Billy."
You dip the spoon into ice cream, digging for a particularly large oreo crumb. "I will blame it on the ice cream."
#scream x reader#final girl fic#scream 1966#scream imagine#scream#stu macher x reader#stu macher#ghostface#ghostface x reader
72 notes
·
View notes
Text
wip wednesday
y'all - i feel like i've been so fucking annoying lately but i'm here to request one thing of you - give me some juicy snippets to read because i'm finally on top of my shit. and i've always wanted to start wip wednesday (for all i know someone has already started it but don't rain on my parade! let me live in denial) and now i maybe can. This is from ALTA which is (omg) so close to being posted. 10 days. fuck. i'm not ready (i am).
“She’s really gone, isn’t she?” TK asks, his voice breaking as his head remains burrowed into Carlos’ shoulder. He’s stopped shaking now, which Carlos takes to be a good sign, but he’s cried so persistently that the whole front of Carlos’ jacket is wet.
He pauses, leans back and cups TK’s face in his hands, using his thumbs to brush away a few errant tears. He briefly considers making a passionate speech about TK’s mother being dead but not gone – living on in his heart – but then he decides for pragmatism. He thinks TK will appreciate that more, anyway.
“Yes,” he says simply. “But that doesn’t mean it’s easy to accept.”
TK sniffs, his glazed eyes staring helplessly into Carlos’ own. “What do I do now, Carlos?”
Carlos sighs, brushing away another of TK's tears. “I’m not really sure, TK,” he admits. “But right now, I can take you home. It might be nice to cry somewhere that isn’t your high school computer lab.”
A tiny, hesitant smile appears at the corners of TK’s mouth. “I think my dad will be relieved,” he says. “He keeps asking why I haven’t cried yet, like it's some kind of crime.”
“Well, he’s definitely going to be pleased to see you,” Carlos points out, as TK nods tearfully.
“Could you— Do you mind coming with me?” TK asks as Carlos steps back and drops his hands. “I don’t really want to be alone and my dad is driving me nuts. My other friends…they wouldn’t understand.”
“I hope they do understand, TK,” Carlos replies solemnly, collecting his books and following TK out of the darkened classroom. “I think everyone will do their best to support you.”
TK makes a non-committal sound as they walk down the empty hall – devoid of students – amplifying the sound of their sneakers on the linoleum. “Not like you,” he says, after a pause. “I know we’ve only been friends for a little bit, but you’re different.”
“Oh yeah?” Carlos asks, pushing open the front doors and following TK down the steps. “In what way?”
TK pauses, looking back up at Carlos as he descends the stairs, a pensive look on his face. “You’re good, Carlos,” he replies simply. “You’re good for me.”
Open tag for anyone to share but also some targeted attacks under the cut (with insane requests, feel free to ignore me)!!!
@theghostofashton (need some exes to lovers PLEASE), @cold-blooded-jelly-doughnut (boxing AU boxing AU!), @goodways (got a tasty treat shannon?) @reyesstrand (food fic???) @strandnreyes (please don't hurt me but you can if you want) @rmd-writes (just because i love you) @heartstringsduet (FIRST AID?!) @carlos-in-glasses (what's next up CIG?) @birdclowns (your wip snippet game has me blurry eyed, i must know more) @fitzherbertssmolder (any comic progress?) @louis-ii-reyes-strand (been loving your snippets) @lilythesilly (fighter pilot AU?!) @kiloskywalker (tarlos fighter pilot AU????) @sanjuwrites (soulmates????) @three-drink-amy (teacher AU teacher AU teacher AU!!) @chicgeekgirl89 (any yachts about?) @lemonlyman-dotcom (some music fic for my ears???) @wandering-night19 (4 x 18 coda???) @thisbuildinghasfeelings (cross stitching update??!!!) @freneticfloetry (something from the soulmates timer fic???) @alrightbuckaroo (summer parisian au my beloved!!!!) @cha-melodius (you've got mail AU????) @redshirt2 (anything you would like to contribute, i'd just love you to keep feeding me!) @iboatedhere (how are those prompts???) @orchidscript (lovingly bullying you to keep writing) @marjansmarwani (i know the words are hard but also i am lovingly bullying you as well <3) @morganaspendragonss (has angst queen got anything this week?) @lightningboltreader (THAT ANGSTY ONE BED THING I AM SCARED BUT I WANT)
77 notes
·
View notes
Text
Let's get some good shit done: 9/26/23
In the name of encouraging each other, supporting each other, and reminding us all how many ways there are to help - how much each of us can make a difference -
Reply or comment (or add in the tags if you’d prefer) with something you did recently to help the environment, your community, or people who need it. Big or small.
<3
Here’s my version. It's been an unusually good couple weeks I think!
Got certified in CPR and first aid (this was to apply for some jobs but I'm still really glad I did it in general)
Started to once again actually honor my damn commitment to wearing masks in stores and the like (slipped over the summer unfortunately)
Researched soil rehabilitation to teach stuff to my mom
Got my mom to start raking dead leaves onto all the (many, many) bare patches in our backyard. Other steps to follow. Soon the yard is gonna be so much healthier! (I hope!)
Relatedly, stopped my mom from accidentally killing all her herb plants by leaving them somewhere with insufficient sun (nobody ever tell my mom I post about this shit lmao)
About to start applying for some care work jobs (cross your fingers for me)
Called my representatives to tell them not to vote for KOSA, on privacy/human rights reasons
Got "smudging ceremony" instructions cut from a business book by a white and non-Indigenous author, now replaced with smoke cleansing. If I'm very lucky my explanatory lil essay will get the author to make the switch in their own business as well
Actually I think I removed smudging from two different books in the past month? (I'm a book editor for context) So that's always good
Removed some ableist language from those books while I was at it. This kind of thing doesn't always come up, but it's always really nice when I get to actually help fix this stuff
Honestly, one of the things that makes me really heartened and feel hopeful about the future is the way I've seen things shift re: sensitivity edits. When I started working in publishing (less than 10 years ago!), I had to carefully count and ration all of my sensitivity comments/notes to make sure they were taken seriously and that none of my bosses or coworkers got pissed at me
Now, I literally advertise sensitivity edits as one of my specialties up front, I regularly get actively thanked and praised specifically for those notes, and I don't have to hold back at all (tho I do ofc still write them very politely)
We still have a ways to go, but there really has been so much of a change in attitudes on this front, writ large
Anyway, essay over - tell me about the cool things you all did!
#me#not news#let's get some good shit done#hope#hope posting#direct action#community#editing#gardening
63 notes
·
View notes
Note
Hello. I noticed these ficlets, so I was wondering if I can add one too: Robin comes out to Steve, but he already figured it out.
Ty for this prompt, here's my reimagined version of the bathroom scene.
Steve sat next to the mall toilet clutching it tightly after emptying his stomach.
"The ceiling stopped spinning for me. Is it still spinning for you?"
"Holy shit. No. You think we puked it all up?"
"Maybe. Ask me something. Interrogate me.
"Haha! Ok. Interrogate you. Sure. Uhm when was the last time you peed your pants?"
"Today."
"What?"
"When the Russian doctor took out the bone saw.
Steve starts giggling again, "Oh my god."
"It was just a little bit though," Robin replies joining in his laughter.
"Yeah it's definitely still in your system."
"Alright my turn."
"Ok, hit me."
"Have you...ever been in love?"
"Honestly? No."
"Not even Nancy Wheeler? She's such a priss."
"Turns out, not really."
"Anyone else you got your eye on?"
"I thought I found someone who's a little bit better for me. And it's crazy. Ever since Dustin got home, he's been saying, you know, "you gotta find your Suzie. You gotta find your Suzie."
"Wait who's Suzie?"
"It's some girl from camp. I guess it's his girlfriend. To be honest with you, I'm not 100% sure she's even real. But that's not...that's not really the point. It doesn't matter. The point is this girl, it's somebody that I didn't even talk to at school. And I don't even know why. Maybe because Tommy H would have made fun of me or I wouldn't be prom king. It's stupid, I mean, Dustin's right, it's all just a bunch of bullshit anyways. Because when I think about it, I should have been hanging out with this girl the whole time. First of all, she's hilarious. She's so funny. Like this summer, I've laughed harder than I have laughed in a really long time. And she's smart. Way smarter than me. She can crack top secret Russian codes. You know, she's honestly unlike anyone I've ever met before.
Robin is quiet in the next stall.
"Robin? Robin, did you just OD in there?"
"No. I am still alive."
Steve slides under the stall, sitting across from Robin.
"The floor's disgusting."
"Yeah well I've already got a bunch of blood and puke on my shirt so...What do you think?"
"About?"
"This girl?"
"She sounds awesome."
"She is awesome"
"Steve, I need to tell you something."
"Yeah Robin?"
"I'm not like Nancy Wheeler."
"I know Robin."
"No you don't understand Steve, I will never be like Nancy Wheeler."
"I know Robin. I lied earlier. I do remember you in Mrs Click's class. I noticed you everyday."
"Steve I wasn't looking at you."
"I know Robin, Tammy Thompson sat next to me."
"What?"
"Honestly you should have better taste than that Muppet."
"She did not sound like a Muppet!"
Steve does a very bad but very accurate impression of Tammy's singing. Robin can't help but laugh.
"Wait but, but how did you know?"
"I didn't love Nancy Wheeler, Robin, and I tried really hard to love you the way that my dad would want me to. But I can't, I don't."
"Holy shit."
"Yeah...Holy shit."
"Is that why you flirted with Eddie Munson the other day?"
"You had a crush on Kermit!"
If they get out of this alive, Steve and Robin think they're going to have a lot to talk about.
#ty for the prompt ❤️#stranger things#stobin#platonic stobin#platonic soulmates#coming out scene#bathroom scene#steve harrington#robin buckley#brief steddie#gay steve harrington#lesbian robin buckley#st3#had to rewatch the scene for the beginning quotes#ficlet
285 notes
·
View notes
Text
Soulmated To Sunshine Eyes
Haikyuu soulmate!au
Bokuto x fem!reader
Warnings: swearing, lil angsty
Sum: One of your childhood best friends, Tetsuro Kuroo, begs you to be Nekomas team manager just in time for the summer training camp, you agreed not knowing who you'd find there
When you turn 17 a tattoo representing your soul mate appears. When they are near(2 mile radius)it tingles but both people have to have them first. It stops when you kiss.
A/n: this has been sitting in my wips for a year and I promised myself I'd get this done in time for my loves birthday and I finished with an hour and a half to spare (shout out to pressurized procrastination). Anyways happy birthday to my favorite beefy owl 😚
"Y/nnnnn! C'mon it'll be fun! You come to all the games anyway and you're good at hyping up the team, even Kenma, and giving advice. And I've seen the statistics notebook you keep. Please, please, please!" Tetsuro begged.
You laughed and rolled your eyes at your best friend. For a few weeks now, well more so since Kenma joined, he'd been trying to get you to be the Nekoma volleyball manager. And honestly he was starting to make a good argument. "If I say yes will you quit bugging me?" You joked as you lightly punched his shoulder.
"Yes ma'am!" He smiled.
"Fine then. You're lucky I love you and Kens." You laughed.
"Oh. By the way we have a week long training camp in a week." He grinned.
"What." That little shit, he KNOWS your 17th birthday is in a couple weeks. The same week as the training camp apparently. Maybe this was his way of trying to cheer you up... You let out a sigh.
He shoved some papers into your hands, hyena laughing before running for his life, "Here's the permission slip! Bye!"
"Tetsuro, I swear I'm gonna kick your ass next time I see you!" You yelled a half empty threat after him. After letting out a sigh you realized at least you'd be with your two best friends when you got your soul mate tattoo. You'd been watching Tetsuro and Kenma play for years. You let out a small smile, you really did love volleyball even though you weren't really good enough to be on a team but played well enough to practice with Tetsu when Kenma refused. Which was more often than not. So maybe being apart of the team as a manager would be fun.
And that was how you got where you are now, in one of the gyms at Shinzen high school. You were a little nervous about being the manager but the team made you feel welcome. Even Coach Nekomata seemed to like you. Probably because you didn't have a problem putting the boys in their place when they needed it. You weren't what he was expecting. This training camp gave you the chance to find your footing before a real game. And you were having a blast. It was the second to last day and you'd found a nice rhythm. You were writing down some stats and advice on the game the team just won when you heard a boisterous voice from the court next to yours. "Oh yeah! Nice one Akaashi!" You looked to see the Fukurodani captian praising his setter. If you remembered correctly his name was Bokuto Kotaro and he was one of the top 5 aces in the country. Who were you kidding, of course you remembered, you were borderline obsessed with picking out talented players and learning as much as you could about them. He wore his emotions on his sleeve and seemed like an amazing person in general. The kind of person people gravitate towards. And to be honest he wasn't bad looking either. "He's a great player isn't he?" Tetsuro said. You nearly jumped out of your skin.
You smacked his chest, your cheeks warm from getting caught staring. "God Tetsu clear your throat or something. You almost gave me a heart attack." Scowling at him you grabbed his water bottle and took a drink. "Yeah, he's pretty powerful but he also has a great setter to back him up and can read his moods too."
"Mmhm." He leaned in closer, taking in your reddened face. His eyes twinkled with knowing and mischief. "You think he's hot don't ya."
"What? No! Shut up!" You screeched, a little too loud. Loud enough to have number 4 look your way and give you a bright smile, his eyes crinkled almost shut. You blushed, how could you not smile back at the sweet owl, so you returned an embarrassed small one. You turned glaring at your best friend as you shoved your notebook into Tetsuro's hands. Back at normal volume, more flustered than mad, "Fuck off Tetsu. What you need to work on is written in there. I need to go refill water bottles."
"Hey, later come by gym 3. Lev, I and a few other guys are having a 3 vs 3." He chuckled.
"Maybe, maybe not." You grumbled.
"Please Y/n, we could use your eyes." Tetsuro teased.
"Fine. But only cause I'm an awesome manager and you're hopeless without me." You mocked back before leaving to do your managerial duties.
"You know you shouldn't tease Y/n like that Tetsuro. Not with her 17th birthday tomorrow." Kenma said quietly as he came up next to him.
"Why? She knows I'm just kidding around." Kuroo told his boyfriend.
"Because she can still kick your ass if she feels like it." Kenma smirked before taking a drink of water.
"True but nah, she loves me too much." Kuroo couldn't wait for the little surprise he had for you later in gym 3....only a little afraid of what you might do to him. He was planning on asking you anyway but this development made things...interesting.
Bokuto had seen you around the training camp all week. Usually you were with Kuroo and Kenma. But this was the first time he'd heard you speak. He wondered what you were shouting at Kuroo about. He looked over giving you his biggest smile hoping it might brighten your mood, if just a little. In return you gave a soft but pretty one before shoving a notebook into Kuroo's hands and briskly walking away. "Hey, hey 'Kaashi, do you know who that is?" He nodded in your direction, you were gathering water bottles.
"The Nekoma manager I assume." Akaashi said disinterested.
Bokuto's cheeks rosied, "I know that! I meant do you know her name?"
"Huh uh." Akaashi smirked catching the color in Bokuto's face. "But earlier Kuroo mentioned he'd try and get their manager to come to the 3 vs 3. Something about 'she has a good eye', I don't know. So maybe you'll meet her tonight." That small smile you gave Bokuto lit up his eyes more than usual. It didn't take long for Akaashi to surmise that his best friend had a crush.
Your duties were done for the day and you decided to go run some laps around the track before heading to gym 3. You thought it might help to get rid of some nervous energy you had about tomorrow. In a few short hours you would have your soulmate tattoo. You didn't know why you were anxious about it, it's not like it mattered. It was bullshit, it wouldn't change anything. You shook your head changing your clothes. It was still pretty warm out so you'd changed into just a sports bra and leggings. Putting your ear buds in you cranked your favorite playlist and started running.
You didn't know how long you ran for but the sky was darker now and your leg muscles were twitching. You also weren't as anxious about tomorrow. Smiling you headed to gym 3 to go watch the game, wondering who the other 4 players were. Your mouth dropped open when you saw who Lev and Tetsuro were playing with. Two from Karasuno and two from Fukurodani. One of which was the ace you had been caught staring at. Briefly you wondered if Kenma would forgive you or help you murder Tetsu.
They were on their second set and you didn't want to interrupt anyone's momentum. You stayed in the doorway silently watching until there was a break in the play. "Oya?!" You shouted to get your best friends attention.
"Oya oya! Y/n, you made it! Bout time!" Kuroo yelled back before walking towards you. Everyone's head swiveled in your direction.
"Oya oya oya!" Bokuto added almost reflexively with a smile to yours and Kuroo's greeting followed by what looked like a scolding from his team mate.
You chuckled quietly to yourself before addressing Testu. "Yeah, I was just running some laps." Your eyes narrowed at him, letting him know he was in for it later for not specifying who he was practicing with.
"Nervous about tomorrow are we?" Tetsuro quietly asked you, for no one else to hear. He handed you a water, concern in his eyes. He may be a goofball and push your buttons but he's always been there when you needed him. Who knew the rooster-haired boy was such a mother hen at heart.
Blowing out a breath, "I'm fine Tets, thank you though." You gulped some water down as Tetsuro ushered you towards the other players. Not quite believing your words.
"Guys, this is Y/n L/n, the new Nekoma manager." Kuroo introduced you, slinging an arm around your shoulder.
Karasuno's number 10 walked over to you holding his hand out, " Hi! I'm Sho—."
You interrupted him, eyes sparkling and grabbed his hand to shake. Your volleyball geekiness was about to show. "You're Hinata Shoyo , Karasuno's Trojan whirlwind middle blocker!" Pointing, you named off the others, " Karasuno's Tsukishima Kei, the poker-faced perceptive bean pole middle blocker. Fukurodani's Akaashi Keiji, the analytical and supportive setter vice captian." You bit the inside of your cheek trying to not sound fangirly. "And last but not least, Fukurodani's Bokuto Kotaro, the powerful owl ace captian. Also one of Japans top 5 aces." Your eyes flicked over to Bokuto and lingered. A small shy smile forming on your lips and nervous laugh leaving your mouth. "Sorry, I don't mean to sound like a know it all. I just kinda have a knack for picking out talented and skilled players...and kind of obsessing. Oh and you all can just call me Y/n by the way."
"And boom. That's why Y/n is the best manager ever. Give her 10 minutes of a game and she'll pick out the specialties of a skilled players on any team!" Tetsuro praised.
"And she's nice when she helps me, she's patient unlike Yaku." Lev added.
"Oh, shut up Tetsuro." You blushed. "And you're welcome Lev. I just noticed you get less frustrated and play better when supported that way is all."
"Thanks Y/n! Well I am a pretty awesome player, right 'Kaashi?" Bokuto puffed his chest out. A faint red tint to his cheeks only Kuroo and Akaashi noticed.
Akaashi rolled his eyes, "Shut up Bo. No one likes someone who's full of themselves."
You could have sworn you saw Bokuto's hair deflate along with his happy attitude. You didn't like seeing him down. Before you could think you squeezed his arm comfortingly. "Hey, there is nothing wrong with being confident and believing in yourself." You gave him a wink, "Besides you're too sweet a guy to be an asshole about it."
Bokuto instantly perked up at your words. "You're so kind Y/n! Thanks, Akaashi means well but can be a little blunt sometimes." Bokuto lifted you up into a hug, your feet leaving the floor.
"Y–you're welcome." Your face felt like it was on fire and sparks were shooting across where your bare skin met his. Gingerly you hugged him back as he twirled you both in a circle. He was so much bigger than you, you felt tiny in his muscle defined arms but oddly enough safe.
When Bokuto set you down Akaashi looked like he was about to scold him again. "Bo...we talked about boundaries."
Bokuto had an embarrassed red tint to his ears but still had his wide infections smile. "Sorry."
"It's okay." You patted Bokuto's chest and smiled up at him and Akaashi, "I get hugs like that from the guys all the time, especially Lev."
Suddenly Hinata was next to you jumping up and down.
"Ahh! You gave me a nickname! The Trojan Whirlwind, so cool! That's that sneaky greek horse right? That's way better than just 'decoy'! You're amazing Y/n!" Hinata exclaimed, wonder twinkled in his eyes.
"I don't know...you really think so?" Excitedly you started to geek out more, talking fast. "Actually I know Karasuno's starting line up. You guys have a pretty talented team! And you guys pick up some tricks from other teams too I noticed. You truly are crows, omnivorous. Kagayama has wicked pinpoint accurate sets, Sawamura's great recives, Nishin—."
"As enlightening as this conversation is we have a game to finish and I don't want to be here any longer than I have to." Tsukishima scoffed adjusting his glasses.
"You don't need to be so rude Tsukishima. Ignore him, he's just salty because he didn't get a cool nickname." Hinata assured you.
You laughed, "No worries. He's right though, I came to watch a game." You glanced at the score board."Hmm. Cats vs Owls and Cats are winning? Here I thought Tetsu's team would be at a disadvantage."
Akaashi stated jabbing his thumb at Hinata and Bokuto, "Why, I've got the shorty and this big baby."
"Because they have to deal with his annoying ass." You snickered and you swore you heard Tsukishima snort as you poked Tetsu in the side. Everyone failed holding in their chuckles.
"Rude, Y/n, rude." Tetsu said as he poked you back.
"You two seem awfully close, are you together?" Hinata questioned, his head tilted to the side.
Lev, Tetsuro and you erupted into a fit a laughter. Between wheezes of catching your breath you answered. "Ew, no. I've know Tets since we were kids, he's like the brother I never wanted. Kenma too infact, except I actually like him. And besides Tetsuro and Kenma are soulmates, poor Kenma right?"
"Well we did kiss that one time." Kuroo fired back, bringing a finger to his cheek.
Everyone but Tsukishima had 'Huh? Excuse me?!' looks on their faces. It was hilarious.
Laughing rolling your eyes, "We were 13 and it was spin the bottle. You weren't the only one I kissed that night, you're not special. In fact it made my skin crawl."
"That hurts Y/n. But I still love you." Kuroo pouted, crushing you in a hug.
"Disgusting." You smiled up at him while pushing his head away, "Yeah, yeah love you too idiot. Now get back to your game."
"Aye aye miss manager!" Kuroo called.
"Don't call me that you rooster haired hyena!" You snarked right back while smacking a loose volleyball towards his head, narrowly missing.
"Okay, I see the brother/sister relationship now." Hinata giggled.
You sat on a bench nearby to watch. It was a pretty close game, your leg was bouncing with excitement. You always got this antsy watching a good game. You were taking a drink of your water sideways still trying to watch the game. Maybe if you hadn't been you would've been able to dodge one of Bokuto's crazy strong cut shot spikes after it landed a point. Next thing you know you were on the ground, right side of your face stinging. You let out a low groan sitting up, rubbing your aching cheek.
"Oh my god Y/n! I'm so sorry, are you okay?" The ace asked helping you up.
"Wow! That was a strong kill! It knocked me over even after it hit the floor!" You gushed, stars in your eyes.
Bokuto's face flushed and his golden eyes met yours. How had you not noticed how pretty they were, like the last brilliant rays of sunshine before the sun sets. They flickered with...you don't know what exactly. Like he was trying to remember something maybe? But it was gone as soon as it came. His hand still remaining on your arm. "But are you okay? You're not hurt?"
Shaking your head and giving him a warm smile, "Yeah, I'm fine owl boy. It wouldn't be the first time I took a ball to the face." Your eyes widend, realizing how that sounded. "V-volleyball, it wouldn't be the first time I was hit by a rogue volleyball!" Hopefully your injured cheek was covering up your embarrassment.
Kuroo smirked slapping Bokuto on the back, "Don't worry Bokuto, Y/n's a tough girl. Oh and that's our point, it was out."
You frowned at Tetsuro. "No it wasn't. It was in, barely. Really it was an amazing shot."
"This is favoritism." Tetsu whined.
"No, it's what happened." You pointedly glared at him, ignoring his implications. At least he didn't say anything about the embarrassing words you just said. "Ask Tsukishima then." Everybody turned to the blonde. Tsukishima shrugged, "She's got a good eye, I'll give her that."
You stuck your tongue out at Kuroo. "See. Now go get the point back."
The game continued for another 15 minutes before the Cats won. It was a close game. The long day had hit you as you leaned against Kuroo after helping clean up. You yawned, "Mmm. Good thing you won, otherwise I was gonna up your training regimen."
Kuroo laughed softly, ruffling your hair. "Oh ye of little faith."
Rubbing your tired eyes, "I have all the faith in you, you jerk." You waved to the other players, "Night guys. It was nice officially meeting you." Saying to no one in particular but subconsciously in your sleepy state your gaze landed on Bokuto. "Good luck in your games tomorrow, unless you play Nekoma of course." You were met with a chorus of goodnights and a couple thank yous from Hinata and Akaashi. Only you, Tetsuro, Akaashi and Bokuto remained.
"You able to make it to your room Y/n? You're practically asleep on your feet." Bokuto asked.
"Hm. Oh. Yeah, it'll just take me awhile. I'm slow when I'm sleepy." You replied as you shuffled towards the door, your eyes half closed. You couldn't wait to flop into bed.
Kuroo kneeled down in front of you. "C'mon and climb up. I don't feel like taking forever walking you back."
You snorted as you wrapped your arms around Kuroo's shoulders for a piggy back ride. "Thanks Tets." You murmured as you layed your head down and your eyes fluttered shut. Not fully awake you drifted between slumber and reality.
"She must be exhausted if she's being this openly nice to me." Kuroo chuckled lightly.
"Hey, can 'Kaashi and me walk with you?" Bokuto asked hopeful.
"Sure, I don't see why not." Kuroo said giving Akaashi a
questioning look. The fun loving ace seemed to have a thing for the insightful Nekoma manager. Akaashi being so intuitive of his best friends emotions gave Kuroo a small nod. This gave Kuroo an idea because you definitely had a crush on the owl captain. Hopefully you wouldn't kill him later if you remembered. "But be warned. When Y/n is super tired like this, she is a lot more loose with the truth." Kuroo talked as he started walking in the direction of the guest lodging.
"What do ya mean?" Bokuto's brows pinched together in confusion following.
"Hm, watch this. Hey, Y/n what'd think of Hinata?" Kuroo grinned.
"Mm, baby sunshine. To pure for this world, protect at all costs." You mumbled.
"Tsukishima?" Kuroo questioned.
"Fucking tsundere if I ever saw one but cool, I guess." They quietly snickered at your reply.
"How 'bout Akaashi?" Kuroo fired.
"Straightforward and calm. Kindhearted." You answered snuggling into Kuroo's back.
"And how do ya feel about Bokuto?" Kuroo questioned lastly. Suddenly butterflies found a home in Bokuto's stomach waiting for your answer.
"He's sweet and funny," you let out a contented sigh, "handsome too." Okay, Kuroo was glad you didn't say anything too embarrassing. Honestly he wouldn't have been surprised if you'd said 'beef cake' instead of handsome.
The otherwise outgoing male was quiet. You really thought that about him? Someone as smart and beautiful as you? A wide dopey smile made its way onto his face along with a dark blush. "Agaashi, Agaashi! Did you hear what she said! She thinks I'm sweet and funny and handsome!" Bokuto whispered excitedly, not wanting to disturb you.
"Yeah, Yeah I heard her Bo." Akaashi gave his friend a small smile before turning to Kuroo. "Isn't she gonna murder you for this?"
"Maybe....probably. If having Bokuto and Y/n realize they like each other is something that will make her happy in the long run, especially after tomorrow it'll be worth it." Kuroo looked up at the night sky, he knew you were secretly dreading tomorrow and how you really felt about the whole soulmate thing. No matter how hard you tried to hide it from him & Kenma.
"What's tomorrow?" Akaashi wondered.
Bokuto was still in a daze over what you said and something was nagging in the back of his mind. He'd only really met you today so why did you seem so familiar? Unconsciously his fingers drummed against his thigh, where his tattoo was. Lost in thought he didn't hear Kuroo's answer and lagged behind the two males. "It's her 17th birthday."
"You lost me, isn't that typically a good thing?" Akaashi noted.
"How do I word this? Well ya know how not everyone's lucky enough to find their soulmate? Y/n's parents are one of those couples. Don't get me wrong they absolutely love eachother and I think that's why Y/n thinks the tattoos don't really matter. If her parents can find love and happiness together it's like it's proof there isn't just one person in the universe just for you. And she probably thinks she's one of those people who won't be able to find their soulmate. She never said any of this to me directly but I've guessed as much and she once said 'the world is a vast place to find the one person you're meant to be with'." Kuroo looked over his shoulder at you, his eyes soft. "So if I can nudge her in the right direction to help her get what her parents have, to make her happy, I'll do it. I owe her that much."
"I see. It's poetic in a way. I mean you really can't help who you fall for, soulmate tattoo or not. You just might fall more for the one you were destined to be with. And what do you mean by 'you owe her'?" Akaashi shrugged, he could understand where you were coming from. He'd had his tattoo for almost half a year and never felt anything. He also knew Bokuto had never felt that tingle of a nearby soulmate and he had had his for almost 3 times that long. And he also knew it saddened Bokuto when he was asked about it, that's why he kept it covered most of the time. He thought as he fingered the tiny tattoo on the inside of his left elbow. A coffee mug and an open manga book.
"Oh that's a funny story actually. I wasn't as outgoing as a kid, barely talked to anyone. So one day this girl and boy come over to me, Y/n and Kenma. And she said 'I've seen you all by yourself every day and you shouldn't be sad and lonely...so we're all friends now kay?', just like that. Honestly she was so bright I couldn't have said no even if I wanted to. I don't think she would have let me either. Even at six she was a force to be reckoned with." Kuroo laughed softly. "So because of Y/n I was fortunate to have my soulmate so early on in my life and fall for him before I even got my tattoo."
Akaashi looked to Bokuto, "Yeah, I'd do the same thing for that goofy bastard."
Kuroo gave Akaashi a devilish grin, "So, you in for trying to get these two love birds together?"
Akaashi smirked back, "Bo's got a big heart but sometimes has trouble expressing it the way he wants to. I'm in."
They had made it to where the boys and girls rooms split off. "Night guys. See ya tomorrow." With a wry grin, "Y/n say goodnight to Akaashi and Bokuto."
"Mm 'night Akaashi." Your arms tightened around Kuroo's shoulders and you murmured still in your vulnerable half asleep state, "Goodnight Kotaro."
Both Kuroo and Akaashi's gaze darted to Bokuto. He was looking at you with such softness in his eyes that they might have thought he was already half in love with you. It was like Akaashi and Kuroo weren't even there. "Goodnight Y/n." Brushing a stray hair from your face he whispered with a gentle tone Akaashi had never heard from his captian. Yep he was definitely smitten.
"Night Kuroo, Y/n." Akaashi grabbed Bokuto's shirt tugging him in the direction of the boys rooms. "Come on you love sick owl."
"I-. Uh." Bokuto stuttered before saying goodnight to the Nekoma captian. As Bokuto was being dragged away Kuroo heard him say, "Hey wait! I'm not love sick!....am I?"
Kuroo laughed at Bokuto's words. If anyone knew if Bokuto was love sick, it'd be Akaashi. A few minutes later you were at your door for your room. Tetsuro carefully set you down making sure you wouldn't fall on your face. "Hey, Y/n we're at your room."
"Hmm. Thanks Tets. Ya know you're not completely annoying. I'm glad you and Kens have each other." You told him with your hand on the doorknob.
"Only cause of you." He bit his lip, he had one more question to ask while you were still painfully truthful. He wanted to make sure his and Akaashi's plans could work. "Can I ask ya something?"
"Mmhmm." You hummed crossing your arms and resting against the door.
"You like Bokuto, right?" Tetsu asked you.
A sad smile splayed on your lips. "Yeah but it doesn't matter. He seems like the 'wait for your soulmate' type so it's pointless hoping he could like me back." You opened the door.
"Y/n..." Kuroo heard the hurt in your voice.
"Goodnight Tetsuro." You whispered shutting the door before he could see the tears brimming in your eyes.
Kuroo blew out a breath. Fuck, he was an idiot for not realizing how deep the soulmate wound really went. But you were an idiot too. "You're really oblivious sometimes Y/n." He whispered to the closed door.
You didn't know if it was from being drained or because of tomorrow or some combo of both. But the moment you shut the door the tears that had been resting on your eyelashes fell down your cheeks. While you changed into pj's and washed your face they never stopped. You fell asleep with the glistening trails running onto the pillow and your heart aching for someone you knew you couldn't have.
The next morning you awoke to your whole back and part of your arms tingling. 'The fuck. Really my whole fucking back?' You didn't give to much thought that it was telling you your soulmate was near. You were in the middle of a huge city for fucks sake. You were more pissed at how big it was. You sighed, twisting your head you looked over your shoulder trying to get some idea of what it looked like. All you were able to see was black, grey and white feathers. Their tips reaching just past your shoulders and onto your arms. There's no way you'd be able to cover the whole thing in this heat. 'Oh well'. As you were getting dressed after taking a quick shower you received a couple texts in your group chat with the boys.
Kens 🐱❤🥺: happy birthday y/n, do you want your yearly bd hugs consecutively or throughout the day?
Tets 🐓❤😝: mornin birthday girl! Remind me again why you let kenma's presents be hugs and not mine?
You smiled before replying. They really just knew what to say to cheer you up.
Y/n 💜: thanks guys 😘 throughout the day pls 🥺and because unforced hugs from kenma are ✨special✨ yours not so much.
Tets 🐓❤😝: this is F A V O R I T I S M 😑
Y/n 💜: wbk but yes❤
Y/n 💜: the only good thing about this shit bd is that it means 17 KENMA HUGS! 🥺
Kens 🐱❤🥺: that's it. Omw rn for your first bd hug.
Tets 🐓❤😝: am I a joke to you?
Y/n 💜: okee kens 🥰. Bro you want the truth or nah?
Tets 🐓❤😝: I—. Babe you see this?
Kens🐱❤🥺: Jared, 19. ➖👅➖
Tets 🐓❤😝: I hate you both
Y/n 💜: no you don't
Kens🐱❤🥺: no you don't
Tets 🐓❤😝: your right 😔 see you two at breakfast 💛💜
Y/n 💜: 🖤💛
Kens 🐱❤🥺: 🖤💜
Five minutes later a knock sounded on your door. "Mornin Kenma!" You said brightly opening the door to one of your besties.
"Mornin." He mumbled wrapping his arms around you.
You didn't realize how bad you needed this. Your hands tightly clenched his shirt. After letting go you whispered, "Thanks Kens, I needed that."
Kenma pulled you in for another hug. "This one doesn't count. You still have 16 left."
You hugged the dual haired boy back, soaking up the extra special hug. A laugh escaping your lips, "You're the best."
Walking to the dining area you looped your arm through Kenma's. Of course he was playing a game but you didn't mind, you liked watching. You and Kenma had a different kind of friendship, you both didn't care about the long stretches of silence between the two of you. You just enjoyed eachothers company. That's why it surprised you when Kenma spoke. "So Tetsuro said you were at the gym last night with him and the others?"
Your hand brushed against your cheek where you were hit. The memory of Bokuto's hand on your arm and his golden gaze...flushed you answered, "Yeah. It was a good game."
Kenma's eyes flicked to yours before going back to his game. "You know Y/n, it's okay to like him. There's nothing wrong with feeling that way."
Goddammit. Between Kenma's perceptiveness and Tetsu's well intentioned blabbering mouth, nothing got past the setter when it came to you. "I—." You blew out a frustrated breath. "I know. I know. It's just... so fucking hard. My mind and my heart say two different things." You came to a stop at the doorway to the dining room. Your eyes easily found a white and grey haired boy laughing at something between bites. Without you knowing it a small grin spread across your lips and your heart beat a little faster.
Kenma noticed your smile and where you were looking. You looked happy, a light in your face he hadn’t seen since you all were innocent children in the ways of understanding what a soulmate was. "Maybe you should let your heart win this time."
"Maybe." You grabbed Kenma's hand and led him to the Nekoma table where everyone was sitting. Taking a seat next to Lev you asked, "Hey, where's Tets at?" They all had a look of mischief on their faces. "Wha—?" A pair of hands covered your eyes for a few seconds and then were gone. Sitting in front of you was a fancy cupcake with a single candle lit.
"Happy Birthday Y/n." Tetsuro hugged you from behind.
"Happy Birthday to the best manager!" The team shouted. Earning a few looks from the other teams.
"You guys didn't have to do anything for me..." Your heart warmed at their thoughtfulness.
"Nonsense, we're lucky to have you! You've done so much for us, this is the least we could do!" Tora gave you a thumbs up.
"How could we not do something for you, you take care of us." Lev nudge your shoulder gently.
"Yeah, you make my life easier by dealing with Lev." Yaku announced.
"Hey!" Lev yelled, insulted.
"Thanks guys. I'm only the best manager because I've got the best team to back it up." A wide happy smile split your face.
"Blow out your candle and make a wish." Tetsu suggested.
You closed your eyes making your wish as you blew out the candle. You dared to wish for something you wouldn't have if not for the conversation you just had with Kenma. You wished maybe, just maybe for a chance at love.
"What'da wish for?" Lev asked.
"For you guys to win all your practice games!" Bringing a finger to your lips, "But really I can't tell, or it won't come true." You gave him a wink.
A pair of flapping arms caught your attention. Of course they were attached to a certain owl boy. Once Bokuto realized he got your attention he gave you a big smile and waved. You let out a small giggle and gave a bright smile. You lifted your hand and returned the wave, your fingers wiggling in the air. Bokuto turned to say something to Akaashi, his face pink. But you didn't notice. Kuroo had playfully tugged on a piece of your hair.
"Oya?" Tetsu smirked at you.
"Oh hush." You said slyly but the smile on your face and blush on your cheeks lingered. "Go eat your breakfast, you have a lot of games to win today and need your strength."
Tetsuro stuck his tongue out. "Yes, miss manager."
You were so happy you'd almost forgotten the constant tingle on your back.
It was the end of the day and Nekomas last game was almost over. The other teams coach had called a time out to try and break Nekoma's momentum. All day you had been rolling your shoulders uselessly, trying to get rid of the ghost like feeling of someone's fingers dancing across the skin of your back. It was really starting to fucking irritate you.
"You okay Y/n? You've been doing that all day." Kenma had observed.
Tetsu came over and wrapped his arms around his soulmate, resting his chin on the crown of Kenma's head. God they were disgustingly cute sometimes. "Whatssup?"
You gave them a sour face. "My soulmate tattoo. It hasn't stopped prickling since I got the damn thing. Not to mention it's on my whole fuckin back and part of my arms." You pulled your sleeve up a little to reveal the tips of feathers. Kuroo was practically radiating excitement. You knew exactly what he was going to say.
"That's great! It means your soulmate is probably at this camp! RIGHT NOW!" Tets almost shouted.
You rolled your eyes. "I'm not that lucky. We're in the middle of a huge city. You know how many people live in a 2 mile radius of here?" Your eyes trailed to the other game you'd been keeping watch on. Or rather player. "...Besides, my hearts kinda already stuck on someone." You admitted out loud. Bokuto seemed more exuberant and carefree today. Even after getting blocked a couple times he was still glowing. Your lips twitched at the untroubled ace. His aura infectious. You were pulled out of your daydream when Tetsuro pulled at the back of your shirt, trying to look at your tattoo. You slapped his hand away. "What do you think your doing?!" You hissed.
He blinked at you innocently. "I just wanted to see."
"Tetsuro, if Y/n doesn't want to show us that's her business." Kenma scolded.
"It's not that, just not right now. You guys are in the middle of a game...and Coach would kill me." Laughing at Tets getting reprimanded by Kenma.
"I don't know, could give us an edge and distract the other team." Tetsu joked.
You chuckled, "Yeah and probably incapacitate Tora, embarrass Lev to the point where he'd be useless, Yaku would yell at anyone who dared to look, and Inuoka would probably try and cover me up without looking."
Tetsuro tried holding in his cackling and Kenma had a rare wide grin on his face. "Okay, okay. You're right. Only we two are immune to your beauty and charm."
You snorted. "Whatever. Now go win this game and make my wish come true or else." You said as you pushed them towards the rest of the team.
The first thing Akaashi woke up to this morning was Bokuto screeching about how his tattoo was tingling. At first Akaashi wondered, today was your 17th birthday...maybe? No they were in a big city. Bokuto's soulmate probably just happened to be nearby today. But then he couldn't stop talking about how you waved and smiled at him at breakfast. So maybe his attitude wasn't due just to his tattoo. He was in the best mood Akaashi had ever seen. Even failed plays didn't bring him down. Akaashi really didn't put it all together until he saw his best friend rub at his thigh, right over his tattoo. "Bo, your leg good?"
"Yeah! It's great. It's just hasn't stopped prickling." Bokuto beamed. "My soulmate must live by the high school or something 'Kaashi!"
'Was this himbo so far gone in his daze last night he didn't hear Kuroo say your birthday was today? And didn't he see the whole Nekoma team wish you a happy birthday at breakfast?' Akaashi thought to himself. "Or something." Akaashi muttered. His eyes gleamed with knowing. He made it his mission to get you two oblivious fools to realize what exactly you were to eachother by the end of today.
After the last game all the coaches surprised everyone with a barbecue for everybodies hard work. You were waiting by the grill with Tetsu and Kenma, waiting for the food to be done. You were starving and the aroma of meat was only making your hunger worsen.
"Hey, here comes your man!" Tetsuro whispered in your ear while playfully nudging you.
Your stomach growled loudly as you swatted at Kuroo. "Food now. Man later."
"You're right. Priorities." Kuroo chuckled holding up his hands. "But that doesn't seem to be stopping Bokuto and Akaashi from coming over here."
You glanced at the Fukurodani duo. Hunger forgotten. "Holy fuck." You whispered. Bokuto Kotaro was not wearing his long knee sleeves. Your face flushed, "No wonder he wears those things. He'd be too powerful otherwise, no one would pay attention to the ball." Your eyes snagging on the rather large tattoo on his left thigh. A cats face, half normal with a y/c eye and half skeletal. And nestled behind the skeleton side was...your favorite flower? It was just a coincidence, lots of people have the same favorite flower and your eye color. Maybe you were biased but you thought it was pretty.
Tetsuro snapped you out of your thoughts with a snort. "Simp much? And is that drool from the bbq...or the cake headed this way."
"Oh, that was a mistake." Kenma commented while playing his game. "It's going to be mildly inconvenient to replace you but you will be missed."
Casually you answered back, "Shuddup. Takes one to know one. I seem to recall certain screenshots that would look great posted on Twitter."
At that moment the Fukurodani pair made it to where you were. "Hey hey hey! What would look great posted on Twitter?" Bokuto asked with a smile.
You smirked at Tetsu, opening your mouth, "Tets caught being—." Tetsuro smacked a hand over your mouth.
"Nothing!" Changing the subject, "Y/n was just about to show us her tattoo. Right?" You licked his hand. "Gross. You don't know where my hand has been, you know how many microbes could be on there!" He yelled wiping it off.
You shrugged, grinning. "I have an excellent immune system." Clearing your throat, "Hey Akaashi," Your cheeks rosied under Bokuto's golden gaze. "H-hey Bokuto."
"Your soulmate tattoo? Cool, usually I keep mine covered but I felt like letting loose today after practice." He smiled lifting his leg. Akaashi groaned, rubbing a hand over his face. How was his best friend this dense?
You crossed your arms to keep the urge to trace it with your fingertips in check. "Er, yeah. I don't even really know what it is. It's on my back and part of my arms. All I know is it has feathers. Yours is gorgeous and interesting though."
"Why don't you have Kuroo take a picture of it so you can see it?" Bokuto suggested.
"That is a great idea Bokuto!" Rubbing his hands together, "C'mere Y/n, let me see that tattoo."
You rolled your eyes. "If I didn't know any better I'd think you were a perv, Tets. I know I'm pretty but think of Kenma."
"Kenma is nothing more to me than a soulmate! I swear!" Kuroo joked.
"Back at ya babe." Kenma replied not looking away from his games. He had long become immune to yours and Kuroo's antics.
"You guys are strange but I'm used to weirdos." Akaashi smirked.
You poked your tongue out at Akaashi, "You say that like its a bad thing." You conceded. "Alright alright. I'll show you after we eat." You were curious about what was on your back.
"Y/nnnnnn. Why must you torture me?" Kuroo complained.
"I ain't ever seen two agreeable best friends, one of em always gotta be a whiney little bitch." You said to Tetsuro.
"So you admit I'm your bestie! Wait- I'm not whiney!" Kuroo exclaimed.
You cackled, "So you admit you're a little bitch?" Your eyes wandering, catching on a small girl holding an empty plate trembling in the middle of a bunch of boys. "I gotta do something, I'll be right back guys." You made your way over to the tiny girl.
"Oi!" Kuroo yelled after you.
"I mean she's not wrong." Akaashi snickered.
"Kenma, Y/n and Akaashi are being mean." Kuroo pouted.
"Show me the lie and I'll defend you." Kenma teased his soulmate.
"I hate it here." Kuroo crossed his arms.
Akaashi nudged him, talking lowly. "While Y/n's gone and Bo's distracted by the food. I found something out." Akaashi had a small impish grin, "I'm 99% sure Bokuto and Y/n are soulmates."
Kuroo's eyes widend. "No fuckin way! How?"
"Well Bo woke up this morning yelling about his tattoo tingling. It's the first time. And then during the last game I noticed he kept massaging his leg. I thought maybe he strained it but I asked and he said it hadn't stopped prickling all day. He thinks his soulmate must live by the high school. The himbo didn't hear it was her birthday today apparently." Akaashi explained.
Kuroo's mouth gaped open. "I think your right. Y/n said hers has been bugging her all day. But she also thinks it's someone out in the city." Kuroo looked to you then to Bokuto. "Holy fucking shit."
You pushed your way through the guys surrounding the girl, "Excuse me boys! Can't you see your frightening the poor thing?" You shooed them away. You knew they were just trying to be friendly but sometimes they didn't know how intimidating they can be. You gave a big smile to the blonde girl in front of you. "Hey, you're one of Karasuno's managers right? I'm Nekomas, my names Y/n. Are you okay? I know the guys can seem scary but most of em are just big softies." You punch one of your hands with the other, "And if they aren't you just have to seem scarier."
She returned a small smile. "H-hi. Yeah, I j-just joined. My names Y-yachi. Hinata mentioned you. He said you were nice. And t-that you gave him a nickname?"
"Really? I actually just joined a couple weeks ago but I've been watching my friends play forever." You blushed slightly at Hinata's compliment. "Er, yeah. I'm kinda a volleyball nerd and it seemed to fit him." You laughed.
"What did you mean by 'seem scarier'?" Yachi timidly asked.
"In my case I just use my scary face to keep Kuroo in line and mess with him...well and for jerks. Watch." You turned to face Tetsuro with dead eyes and your face emotionless except for the creepy grin plastered on. In a sing-song voice, "Kuroo Tetsuro!"
You only use his full name when he's in trouble trouble. Stepping behind Kenma for protection, "I didn't even do anything!"
"I know." You winked and softend your smile to a friendly one. Turning back to Yachi, "See, just pretend to be even more badass then you actually are. Give me your best scary face."
"I'm not badass, not like you..." Yachi murmured.
You snorted. "I don't know, taking on a rowdy buncha boys from Karasuno? Seems pretty badass to me."
Yachi gave you a small smile. "Ok." You could see the gears turning in her mind. Then she gave you her best scary-badass face.
"Perfect! No one will mess with you with that face!" You said excitedly. "It actually kinda reminds me of the look your setter gives Hinata if he messes up."
Yachi giggled. "Kageyama's angry face is the scariest thing I've seen."
"Ready to put your new skill to the test?" You raised an eyebrow.
With a determined nod she walked to the nearest grill and cleared her throat. "Excuse me."
A couple boys turned, "Hey, cu....tie." Their faces paled slightly and their words trailed off. As they stepped aside leaving their spots at the grill open, "Ah, nevermind."
You chuckled lightly as Yachi turned around with a plate full of meat and veggies. Giving her a thumbs up as she walked back to you. "See I knew you could do it!"
"Thanks Y/n!" Yachi smiled.
"No prob-." Right then your stomach growled ferociously. Embarrassed you replied, "-lem. Um I better go and get some food before those heathens eat it all and my stomach decides to eat itself. Bye, Yachi!"
"See ya Y/n!" Yachi waved goodbye.
Making your way back to your little group your mouth watered. God you were starving and there was a juicy looking piece of meat in front of Tetsuro. Probably his but you have just as quick reflexes as him. With your chopsticks you grabbed it quickly while he was talking to Kenma. A second later another pair barely missing said BBQ. "Haha, too slow Tets!" You teased bringing the BBQ closer to your mouth. Except it wasn't Tetsuro.
"Damn Y/n, you're quick!" Bokuto laughed.
"Oh. Sorry, I assumed that was Tetsu's food. Here you take it." Your cheeks rosied as you set the food on his plate.
"No, it was his. I was just going to steal it. BBQ meats my favorite." Bokuto grinned, his eyes crinkling. "Do you want to share? I haven't seen you eat anything yet."
"Sure, us food pilferers gotta stick together!" You nudged his side playfully.
"Kenma, Akaashi!" Kuroo whispered fiercely. "You seein this shit?!"
"Wow." Kenmas eyes widened slightly.
"Whoa, Bo is sharing BBQ meat. That's big." Akaashi commented while turning to hand a cup of water to a choking Kageyama, completely unfazed.
"Y/n sharing food at all is...unnatural. You wouldn't want to get between her and her food, especially when she's hungry." Kuroo's eyes looked distant as he shivered remembering the one time he made such a mistake. "It's not pretty, trust me."
You turned to the three boys swallowing the mouthful you had. "My shit talkin radar is going off. You talkin smack, Tets?"
Tetsuro smirked, "No, just observing that you're actually sharing food with someone."
You puffed your cheeks out in embarrassment. "I have no idea what you're talking about. I share...sometimes."
"Random stray animals don't count." Kuroo laughed.
"They do too! They're just so cute and I want to give them all the love they deserve." You pouted.
"So does that make Bokuto a stray that needs all the love?" Akaashi teased.
"And that you think he's cute?" Kuroo questioned.
Bokuto's ears perked at the sound of his name and heard Akaashi and Kuroo's questions. It took everything in him to keep his face neutral and not look like he was eager waiting for what you would say.
He did not do a good a job as he thought he was doing.
Your mouth gaped open as your cheeks flushed. You glanced at Bokuto. His face was as flushed as yours felt and it looked like he wanted to take a step closer to you, he was leaning so close. Maybe you should take a chance. Besides the obvious dislike of today in general, you felt an air of hope also. Taking a sharp inhale through your nose you said quietly, "Well, you'd have to be a blind idiot to not think he's attractive. And I'm not blind nor an idiot so." You shrugged your shoulders while shoving a bite of food into your mouth. Akaashi and Kuroo had shocked expressions on their faces. They were not expecting you to admit it. Kenma had a small smile that said he was proud of you. Bokuto was practically glowing. You cleared your throat, changing subject. "So, we're done eating now yeah? I promised to show you my soulmate tattoo and I'm a woman of my word." You handed Tetsuro your phone. "Bokuto had the idea you take a picture so I can see the whole thing." In a small voice you asked, "Can you, please?"
That fear in your voice snapped Kuroo out of his shock. "Y/n, I know I've been giving you shit about it but really you don't have to." Tetsu spoke quietly pulling you into a gentle hug.
Kenma sensed your discomfort and wormed his way into your and Tetsu's hug, giving you your last birthday hug. "He's right. Don't force yourself if you don't want to."
You shook your head, squeezing tight your two best friends. "No, I want to. Curious even but...I know it's stupid but I'm scared."
"That's okay. We're here for you." Tets whispered.
"No matter what." Kenma replied.
"I love you guys, thanks." You nodded letting go. A wry smile gracing your lips. "How fitting my 17th birthday hug be right before the big reveal." You clapped your hands together, getting back to business. "Ight, let's see what this big badass bitch looks like." With that you twirled on your heel and pulled your shirt just over your head, leaving your arms in; your back facing the group of 4 boys. You did have some modesty being as you were surrounded by 150+ people.
"Oh damn! You weren't kidding Y/n. It really does take up your whole back." Kuroo said shocked as he took in the tattoo smiling.
You rolled your eyes. "Well not all of us can have cute little dainty ones like you and Kens." Testu had a little gaming controller on his inner bicep and Kens had the chemical formula for love on his ribcage. Lucky bastards.
You heard Kenmas quiet voice. "Y/n, I think you'll be pleasantly surprised." You heard the click of your phone taking the picture.
"It's actually quite lovely too." Akaashi complimented as his theory was confirmed.
"Wow." You heard Bokuto murmur and before you could turn around you felt a finger delicately trace your back. You inhaled sharply as that sensation overrode the tingling of your tattoo. Was Tetsu being a creep? Or..? An awkward cough pulled you out of your thoughts and the finger gliding across your skin disappeared. Slipping your shirt back on you turned around. To be face to face with Bokuto. Was he the one touching you like that?! Your face turned a violent shade of red and your brain was glitching. Bokuto was staring at you intensely, his eyes zeroing in on yours.
Kuroo nudged your shoulder a wild grin on his face. "Here ya go Y/n." He sang song.
Breaking eye contact from Bokuto and looking at your phone you gasped. You were met with the same golden sunset eyes you'd recognize anywhere. The very same ones you were just staring into. Only it wasn't Bokuto's face looking back at you. This time it was a grey, black and white owl with its wings spread in flight against a night sky filled with stars. And a handful of the stars were made into a constellation of a volleyball. No. No way was it possible. You looked up into the bright metallic eyes you had fell hard for. "You...?"
One of Bokuto's warm hands cupped your cheek tilting your head up. Leaning down he whispered, "I knew I remembered those eyes from somewhere."
His lips were on yours and stealing the breath from you. Eyes fluttering shut, your tattoo had finally stopped tingling and the knot in your heart loosened. Bokuto fucking Kotaro, the boy your heart had already started to fall for, was your soulmate. Suddenly you were lifted off the ground. Instinctively your legs wound their way around his waist and your arms twined around his shoulders, one hand in his hair. Bokuto lightly bit your lip making you gasp and open your mouth. His tongue darting inside to meet yours. A supernova of explosions were crackling in your veins. If he hadn't been holding you you would have fell due to the fact your legs becoming jelly. Your lungs were beginning to strain from lack of oxygen but you didn't care. You didn't need air when your nerves were buzzing alive from the contact with Bokuto. You didn't know how long you two had been kissing but Bokuto pulled away just enough. Both of you were breathing hard. "I promised myself that would be the first thing I did when I found my soulmate. When I found you."
A breathy laugh left you. "I'm gonna have to add kissing to the list of skills you have, Bokuto."
"Oh?" He smiled fondly at you. "Ya know Y/n you can call me Kotaro. Like last night."
Your brow furrowed. "I didn't—" Hazy memories of last night after the game came to you in flashes. You did use his given name. But more embarrassing is what you'd said about him in your frustratingly truthful state. A vulnerability only a few knew about. You were going to kill him. Or at least make him think so. "Hey Kotaro could you set me down for a sec please."
"Sure thing, baby owl." Kotaro set you down gently and kissed your cheek.
You blushed at the pet name and the soft kiss. Turning to the others you started to count silently on your fingers.
"What are you doing?" Akaashi questioned confusedly. He thought you would have been overjoyed at the fact you and Bo were soulmates.
"Oh I'm counting the ingredients I need to buy for apple pie for Kenma. Kens how many pies do you think you'll need to get over Tets' death?" You smiled sunnily at Tetsuro.
"Hmmm. I think five would be good." Kenma replied.
"I am worth way more than 5! Wait, what?" Tetsuro panicked. "I promise Y/n I had the purest of intentions!"
You took a step towards Kuroo and he took one back. "Oh?" You started chasing after Tetsu and he only made it a few feet before you tackled him.
"Y/n please don't kill me! Akaashi and I realized you and Bokuto liked eachother and we thought this would get the ball rolling, honest!" To say Kuroo was shocked when you hugged him would be an understatement. You weren't killing him?
Unwinding your arms from his neck you pressed a quick kiss to his cheek. "Thanks Tets, for making me join the team" you mumbled, "and for helping with Ko."
Kuroo grinned. "HEY BABE! DID YA HEAR Y/N THANKING ME?! Y/N. THANKING. ME."
You rolled your eyes still smiling and pushed Tetsuro away. "And moments ruined." Once you made your way back to the group you snuggled yourself up against Kotaro's side and he wrapped his arm around you. Looking towards Akaashi you thanked him also. " Thank you for nudging us together so if you ever have a sweet tooth for a baked good, I'm your girl."
Kotaro kissed the top of your head. "My sweet girl."
"Oh you don't have to do that. I'm just happy Bo is happy, that's good enough for me." Keiji chuckled.
"Trust me Akaashi, you'll definitely want to take her up on her offer. Her apple pies are delicious and she makes mine and Tetsu's birthday cake every year too." Kenma added while still playing his game. You blushed at his compliment.
"Alright then, I will." Akaashi nodded.
"What about me?" Kotaro squeezed you & had a little bit of a pout.
You reached up on your toes and pulled him down to kiss his forehead. "For you, owl boy, I'll make a whole bakeries worth." You pecked him on the lips.
"Ew. Is this what me and Kenma are like?" Tetsu's face was all screwed up in disgust. "There is no way we are that bad. Right Kitten?" He declared as he was hugging Kenma from behind with his chin resting on Kenma's head. You've noticed that's his favorite way to be lovey.
"You are." Kens replied.
"Sorry bro but the love of your life is right." You giggled.
"I honestly don't know how I put up with you two. I deserve a medal." Tets said bewildered.
"Sure bestie. Sure you do." You ruffled his already messy hair.
"Don't patronize me." He pointed a finger at you.
You batted your eyelashes. "Me? Never."
Kuroo looked at Bokuto. "Y/n is your problem now. Good luck bro."
Incredulously you yelled. "HEY I'M NOT—"
Kotaro squeezed you tighter with one arm & with the other gently tilted your chin up, making you look at him. You could feel your heart go all soft looking into those golden eyes. "You're not a problem. Your my soulmate. I can't wait to get to know you and fall even more in love with you." He leaned in closer giving you another one of those earth shattering kisses.
This boy. This boy made your heart flutter, your stomach swirl... and your brain dumb. Thats why when he regretfully pulled away the only thing that came out of your stupid mouth was a whispered "Oh."
"Damn Bo way to make literally the whole camp feel single." Kuroo laughed. "Akaashi did you know that he was such a Casanova?"
Keiji nodded while eating a slice of watermelon & swallowed before answering. "I knew he was a romantic but not this intense."
A few hours later everyone was waiting to get on their busses to go home. You waved goodbye to the new friends you had made. However you and Kotaro were holding on to one another. You'd only just found eachother and now you had to say goodbye. You bit your lip. "I don't want to go yet." A few hours together had turned you into a mess.
"Hey, baby owl," His thumb traced your cheek, "its okay. We don't live that far from eachother. We'll see eachother all the time and talk on the phone yeah?"
You leaned into his warm touch. "You're right." You turned to kiss his palm. His cheeks flushed. He was also a mess. "So call me when you get home, to let me you got there okay, alright?"
At first his lips brushed yours then he deepened the kiss. Just as your lungs were about to scream he pulled away but just barely. Whispering "Looking forward to it."
That night you talked until the brightest of stars dimmed and the sun rose. Turning the sky a swath of pink, orange and a color that was quickly becoming your favorite. A color that reminded you of your soulmates sunshine eyes.
#haikyuu#haikyuu!!#bokuto kotaro#bokuto x reader#bokuto x fem!reader#soulmate au#a dash of kuroken#hes so sweet and for what 🥺#i love a beefy owl himbo and his name is Kotaro#it is his day & his day only#happy birthday bby#my tiny blog
254 notes
·
View notes
Text
yesterday's comphet awards made me think about how i've known for like 10 years that i'm more into women than men, so this isn't the same but either case i clearly needed to write this down so:
i'm 31, almost 32 now, and i've never had a relationship or anything that comes with that. i'm queer, and i live in one of the safest countries for people like us. but i don't know how gay girls find each other. when i finally worked up the courage to try dating apps shortly before the pandemic hit i only had girls as an option because guys felt too scary. i've tried several times. but living in sweden clearly doesn't mean it's easy anyway, at least not when it's in the north because there are so few i keep swiping through everyone until there's no more available. and then you barely match with anyone, and when you do no one speaks first, and when you do talk she stops responding... and the few dates i have been on didn't lead anywhere, because of course it takes time to find the right one, and being on the ace spectrum is so confusing because i don't know if i just need to give it more time but i guess if we don't even bond as friends it's probably not going to change later either...
anyway, so frustration has twice made me add men on tinder as well. because maybe i just need to give them a chance too right? and there are sooo many, so many, jesus, with only girls i had like... "5 people liked you" and within minutes of having guys too there were 99+
so i swipe and i try I TRY ALRIGHT but. men. are so. so uninteresting. i feel nothing. but i don't feel super much about random women either, sure women are generally prettier, it's much easier for me to think a woman is hot than a man, but still, maybe it's the demi thing, maybe i would feel more with time, i have had feelings for guys before so??? (and some specific fictional men are so fine, so maybe, right??)
yeah so. this year (after several overwhelming chats with different guys and one awkward date with one i definitely didn't want to meet again) i ended up forcing myself to date a guy the entire summer. he was nice, and also inexperienced and slow, and he knew i was unsure but i still felt like such an asshole. because in truth i wanted to go home whenever we met. i cried before and after. but i didn't know if it was because i was scared in general because everything was new and i have shit self-esteem and being demi is so difficult when i want so much and i was so worried i'd end it too soon and lose the chance i had + depression and anxiety flared up so bad because of all this so like. everything was shit.
like, in hindsight it's so obvious it wasn't right. it made me spiral deeper into depression again. but i can't really regret it either because maybe i needed this to realize some things, and now at least i've done more than 2 dates with the same person, i've talked with someone about (lack of) experience and how we feel, i've had someone interested in me who wanted more if i'd wanted it too. i've felt excited at the possibility of being kissed, even asked for it finally just to know, and yeah it was just a small peck and it was boring and barely counts tbh but it was something and now i've done that. and i've also had the very weird experience of a guy sitting close with his arm around me and gently brushing his fingers over my arm, and asking if the closeness turned me on... and while it was okay and nice, like he wasn't creepy or anything, i still felt nothing. so while well aware that yeah he was definitely feeling things, i truthfully said "no". which was probably an important experience to have also, to have done that, and to have met a guy who didn't make me feel unsafe about or because of it. because that's another thing, thinking that maybe my hesitations about men was only a fear of ending up with a bad one. and maybe that still plays a part, but also.... god i'm so clearly more gay than bi.
and i think i really did know that already, yet i did all of this anyway, forced myself to try. because finding a girlfriend had proven so fucking difficult, maybe i simply did have to be less picky and more open about men also.
idk how to end this, i don't have a well-thought-out point to make, and i dunno if anyone will even read all this but i'll post it for myself anyway. and just in case someone who ends up reading it feels similar, maybe you're in your 20s or later and feel like everyone else gets to experience romance and sex while you're left behind... well. maybe it doesn't help, but you're not alone. and i'm not alone either, even though it feels like it. just wanted to say that <3
also next time i get tinder im back to only girls.
#the “i want a girlfriend but don't know how to find her so i guess i'll try liking men instead” experience#and#the “i'm gay and demi and dating strangers is horrible” experience#if anyone reads all this 😘#but feel free to ignore it too#it's very personal but maybe it could help someone else feel less alone#LMAO ACCIDENTALLY POSTED WITHOUT NOTICING oh well
13 notes
·
View notes
Note
Hey, hope you're having a good time currently.
Also, hope you're ready for a weird roller-coaster ride of vagueness and strangeness. However, I hope this may cheer you up, as weird as it is.
So, I wanted to say that your art, and also the general way you capture dynamics, reminds me of one oddly specific childhood memory I have.
(Like, vaguely a reminder, but still)
For context, I have a younger sibling who's always had terrible luck with bees and wasps and all those stingers.
I've only once in my life been stung, they get stung at least five times a year.
(Incredible they haven't developed any allergies or anything).
With that said, referring back to my earlier statement, here's the oddly specific childhood memory your art, and general capture of dynamics, reminds me of:
Obviously, my sibling is in no way, shape, or form, fond of these stingers. Now, we used to have this trampoline in our garden when we were younger and they really wanted to go jump around.
However, we didn't have shoes, (which is a completely different and irrelevant story, so let's not indulge), point is, they was scared of getting stung and shit because it was summer and those shits are relentless.
So, (as the good big brother I am), I offered to go first because they really wanted to go jump: my idea was that I went first, then they could tread in my steps that I was sure were safe. They agreed and off we went.
I got just to the trampoline, and then I hear them cry out, and wouldn't you know it? They fucking stepped on a stinger. So, I carry them in, we sit down, get out the stinger part and apply some salve and shit.
At the time there was this sort of panic, we'd been abandoned at home (again, totally different story) and we were just kids who weren't really sure how to handle all that, yet, it's one of the fondest and softest moments I remember of my younger sibling and I.
Just, it was so chaotic and we weren't really okay at the time, which makes it even softer to me. Because, even if we didn't have shit at the time, we still had each other. Those lively little moments of life and siblinghood will honestly always stick with me as a part of me. So it's a happy feeling your art provides me with and I'm grateful for it.
Generally the memory of how unlucky they were in that moment (and this is a compliment, please don't misunderstand) applies to your art.
However, what I think I also mean to say is:
Your art has this soft yet energetic feel to it, I guess that's what I'm trying to convey with this memory. It reminds me of some of my best and most treasured memories. I don't even know why it does that, I really couldn't tell you, but either way I love your art very much. Even in itself, without the undertone reminder of that memory, it's gorgeous.
Even if you may feel you need to improve, or simply that you want to, I can't wait to see just how wonderful such changes would be. It's a beautiful art style.
All in all, I will never truly know you as a person, and yet it's intriguing to think about how I look at your art and feel a sense of happiness because it reminds me of a loved one. I may not know you, but I wish you all the best. And I hope you've got (a) loved one(s) you get these kind of warm and fuzzy little reminders from.
Anyway, I should stop now. Hope you didn't die from this ramble and that I didn't tire you too much :)
Love, Anon.
this is... the wildest ask I ever got omg this reads like a novel?? 😭 but also one of the nicest asks at the same time thank you so much anon!! I have no idea how my art manages to invoke these feelings and memories but I'm so happy you like it ;u; thank you!!
#anon#noranasks#also the way you casually drop bombs like being abandoned at childhood#and never elaborate#so very gen z of you#but also i hope you're ok anon#T_T#asks
75 notes
·
View notes
Text
Dad’s best friend
Bucky x Female reader
warnings: alcohol, age gap (the reader is in her 20′s Bucky is in his 30′s)
word count: 2067
A/N: This is my first Bucky fic! I know its shit XD
Reblogs and likes are much appreciated 💚
-------------------
Your dad was having a party, which he usually did every summer. You were happy to help out, getting the salads and stuff ready while your dad prepared the stakes for the grill. The doorbell rang and you looked at the time "Bit early for people to show up?"
"It's probably Buck, he said he would early if we needed any help" You hadn't seen Bucky in months being busy with work and well life. "Okay, I'll get it"
"Thanks, honey"
Opening the door, you were stunned by the person standing before you. He is beautiful. You had known Buckyobviously, but something was different. "Hello, Mr. Barnes"
"Woah doll, You're making me feel old. Just call me Bucky" he smiles.
"I'm sorry, hello Bucky" you smile back.
"Come on in, dad is in the kitchen preparing the stakes"
He walks in and stops in front of you, kissing your cheek "Thanks doll"
Your head felt fuzzy, touching your cheek where he kissed still feeling the burn from the rub off his beard.
"Everything alright Y/N?"
Snapping you out of your trance, closing the door, and making your way back to the kitchen with Bucky. "Hey, Buck!! I think Y/N and I have everything covered so just take a seat"
Bucky sat down at the kitchen island and you placed an open beer in front of him "Wow, great service here" he laughs.
"Dad I'm gonna get changed but call if you need any help with anything"
"That's alright honey, go ahead"
Leaving the kitchen to go to your room you couldn't help but think of Bucky. He was new to the company, but he and your dad hit it off straight away and were best friends. You hear funny stories about him all the time but you felt different about him now. Shaking the thoughts from your head you get dressed and head back downstairs. Bucky and your dad were out at the grill.
As the day went on and all of your dad's friends arrived you were busy bringing food and drinks out. Heading back into the kitchen to clean up a little and make sure there were clean glasses. As you were standing at the sink you felt a hand sneak around your lower back and land on your hip. "Need any help, doll?"
"N-no thank you Bucky, I've got it under control"
"Okay, how have you been?"
"Just been busy with work and stuff"
His hand moves to your lower back "How's that boyfriend of yours?"
"He's not my boyfriend anymore, he said I didn't have time for him anymore so he fucked someone else"
"What? Where does he live? I'll go over there and kick his ass!"
"No Bucky it's fine, I don't care. I was gonna break up with him anyways, he just beat me to it"
"Why were you gonna break up with him? He sound's like a prince" He says sarcastically.
"He didn't take care of me like I thought he would," you say leaning against the kitchen island.
"What do you mean doll?"
"He was all about himself" Bucky looked at you puzzled.
"I shouldn't be talking to you like this" Your cheeks started to burn red from embarrassment. Concern grew on Bucky's face.
"He didn't hurt you, did he?"
"No, no nothing like that, I uh, kinda felt like a sex doll with him"
"What do you mean?"
"Once he got what he wanted that was it, he just went to sleep or went out with the boys"
Bucky's eyes widened. "See this is weird" covering your face and then feeling his hands on yours as he pulled your hands away from your face. "You shouldn't have been treated that way princess" Your eyes focused on his hands holding yours against his chest. "Hey" His voice snapped you back to reality. "You don't deserve that, you deserve so much more"
"H-how do I know what I deserve?"
!I- I can show you" he whispers and your eyes grow wide. "My god princess, your dad will have my balls if he found out" he chuckles and looks around, then back at you. "I can show you how you should be treated, worshiped even"
"Yes Bucky, I want you to show me"
"Okay baby, here's my key. Don't leave yet I need you to wait for a little bit. Tell your parents you're staying at a friend's house, then go to my place and wait for me there. I promise I won't keep you waiting long. Just watch some TV till I get there okay?"
"Okay James"
He smiled and kissed you softly then went back outside to the party. Is this really happening? You have had a crush on Bucky but knew nothing could happen, but now it is? Putting the key in your pocket, you joined everyone outside.
After an hour had passed which felt like longer, you found Bucky talking with your parents. You came up behind bucky and stood beside him. "Hey, honey everything alright?"
"Yeah everything is fine dad, I just wanted to let you guys know that I'm gonna stay at Jane's tonight. We are gonna go out so I'll stay over"
"Alright, honey have a great time!" "I hope" you whisper and Bucky almost chokes on his drink. "What honey?"
"Nothing! I'm gonna get ready and go". Hugging your parents and Bucky shoots you a wink as you leave. Running upstairs, had a quick shower, got dressed, packed a few things in a bag, and left.
Driving to his house didn't take you very long. You were speeding. Staying in the car for a few minutes and took a few deep breaths, then got out and went inside. Taking a seat on his couch and turning on the TV. Your leg wouldn't stop bouncing. What if he was joking? He's gonna come home and tell you to leave. Every bad thought you could think of went through your mind. After sitting there for another while you were sure this was a joke and got up, got your bag, and turned the TV off. When you turned to leave, Bucky opened the door and walked in with a huge smile on his face.
"Hey, doll. Going somewhere?"
"I thought you were joking so I was going to leave"
He walked slowly up to you "I'm not joking baby, but if you want to leave, you can. I'm not gonna stop you"
Dropping your bag back down, you sat on the couch and he joined you throwing his arm over the back of the couch "God, your dad is gonna kill me"
"Can we not talk about my dad right now?" "Okay," he whispers and moves closer to you, pushing your hair behind your ear, his hand resting on the back of your head as he pulls you against his lips. He pulls away, letting his thumb run across your lips "You have no idea how long I have wanted to do that"
"No I don't know, you've thought about me?"
He looks down, almost like he is embarrassed. "Yeah, I couldn't help it, you're so beautiful. If you gave me a chance doll, I can show you everything you desire. Show you how you should be treated".
"I've thought about you too Bucky"
"You have?"
"Yeah" you whisper. He kisses you again pulling you close to his body, grabbing your leg to pull you over his lap. "Any time you want me to stop, I'll stop"
"I don't want you to stop"
"Hold on tight doll"
He gets up from the couch holding onto you, carrying you to the bed. Laying you down on the pillows and kissing you softly.
"If anything is uncomfortable for you, just tell me okay". Bucky kisses your neck while undoing your jeans, slowly moving his way down your body as he pulls them off and throws them onto the floor.
"Oh wow, did you wear these just for me baby?£ looking at your black lace panties. "Mhm". He lifts your shirt to see your matching black lace bra. "You look amazing baby" He leans down to kiss you and you run your hands under his shirt and pull it off him. He lays beside you kissing you again, feeling his hand cupping your breast, then slowly moving it down lower. He hooks your leg over his giving him access to your aching core. His fingers trace over your panties and he finally touches where you wanted.
Your back arches off the bed and he chuckles bringing his lips to your ear and whispering "You're soaked baby, all this for me?"
"Mhm"
"Use your words baby"
"Y-yes Bucky it's all f-for you"
Bucky gets up and lays himself on top of you gently and kisses your neck, making his way down your body and hooking his fingers in your panties and slipping them off. "Oh um, sorry"
"Sorry doll? for what?"
"I didn't shave there, I know that guys don't like it when it looks like that"
"Honey, you're not getting fucked by a boy tonight, you're getting fuxked by a man"
He smirks and bury's his head in your pussy. You feel his tongue going through your folds and then his lips locking around your sensitive nub making you moan out and arch off the bed. "Oh god, bucky!"
He holds onto your hips as he laps at your juices and moans sending vibrations through you. "Oh god, please keep going! Oh, fuck" FUCK!" Everything went dark for a few moments, when you could see again Bucky was stroking your hair and calling you his good girl. "Hey, you with me baby?"
"Yeah"
"Good"
"I've um, never had that done to me before" Bucky looks at you surprised.
"Guys have said it tastes weird"
Bucky leans in and kisses you passionately. "Well? How do you taste?"
Biting your bottom lip "It tastes good" You lean in and kiss him again, your hands undoing his jeans and palming him.
He lays you back on the bed and he sits up taking his jeans and boxers off. Your eyes widen at the sight of him. He leans over you grabbing a condom from his bedside locker. "Here, let me Buck" Taking the condom from him, opened it and rolled it onto his huge member. Kissing your neck as you start to slowly jerk him off. He brings your eyes to him "I'll go slow, if anything is wrong just tell me okay?" You nod and lay back on the bed and he positions himself between your legs. He rubs his cock through your folds and then lines himself up at your entrance. Slowly, he pushes himself in. A mixture of pleasure and pain overcomes you, feeling him stretching you.
"Fuck baby, you're so tight" He grunts into your ear. He waits for a moment, watching your face, your eyes closed and your brows knitted together. "That#s it baby, look at you, so full with my cock"
His hands holding onto your hips, holding you in place. "Please move Bucky"
He slowly pulls out and back in again. His lips are all over your neck and chest. Wrapping your legs around his waist "Faster Bucky"
"Baby girl, you never need it faster" He pulls your leg up on his shoulder "You just need it deeper"
Hitting a brand new spot "Oh fuck Bucky" You moan out "Please don't stop"
He smiles and kisses you. He keeps going at the same pace hitting your sweet spot over and over again. You feel the coil in your stomach tighten "You gonna cum baby? I feel you squeezing me"
"Fuck Bucky I'm gonna cum!" He starts to rub your clit and it sends you over the edge. You cum moaning his name, your pussy clenched around his cock making him spill his hot seed into the condom. Both of you are out of breath coming down from your highs.
"You okay sweetheart?"
"Yes Bucky, that was amazing!"
"If you want me to doll, I can show you so much more" You can't help but smile.
"I'll be right back" Watching him leave the room to go to the bathroom. He returns with a damp cloth to clean you up.
"Thank you"
"You're welcome baby"
He slips into bed with you and holds you close to him. Closing your eyes you can't help but smile.
109 notes
·
View notes
Note
(Vent sorry, not about queerness I just have nowhere else to say this where I'll get any sort of response)
Ive been having to deal with so much stuff lately. Like I was fine when I was in the midst of severe depression cause I didn't think I'd live very long anyways but now I need to come to terms with everything I've been ignoring for at least a year and at most my whole life. Like I'm AuDHD in a decently ableist family (middle/working class white cishet moderate leftists who think they're very progressive, you know the type) and I've had absolutely shit experiences with the people who should be helping me with that stuff (my old therapist was actively uneducated and ableist, my psychiatrist was a white cishet man in his 60s or 70s and I had to teach him what masking is and how adhd and autism present in AFAB people) which makes that really difficult in general because all my friends know I have AuDHD but I can't officially come out and say that I do because my family will deny it and tell me I'm being attention seeking and looking for excuses for being lazy and a flawed person. I also don't physically look the way I've been convincing myself I look naturally for a long time (yay anorexia recovery) and it's just messing me up a lot because when I look at my reflection I just feel visceral disgust. I'm still on the lower end of a healthy weight, but I can only see a few of my ribs now and my stomach isn't flat anymore. Everyone else says they can't notice but I feel like I've lost everything that made me good, and I'm scared that gaining weight is going to stop me from passing. I hate being with my parents and I just feel like I'm a horrible person for that, I only got hit once and other than that they're just toxic and sort of manipulative/emotionally abusive. They try their best they just can't raise me right and I feel like shit for that. I wish I could be spending more time outside, but I had a medical emergency thing on Tuesday (my mom doesn't let me call it a seizure because we don't know for sure) and I'm scared that that's going to happen again, and my constant joint pain has just gotten worse. My friends are telling me that I need to talk to a doctor about this, but the wait time for rheumatology is insane and my parents thing I'm making it up/exaggerating/looking for attention and even if they believe me they don't think it's important and worth getting help for. I'm scared that I'm going to die, last time it happened my entire body went numb and stiff and I couldn't move and I was just twitching for like 15 minutes. I also completely lost my vision before this happened, and it was greyscale/coming back slowly for the entire thing, plus I could barely hear anything. If that happens again I genuinely think that I might die. I also have scars all over my legs and chest and I have to either hide them or find some sort of explanation for them that won't make the people I work with during the summer think I'm not suited for working with kids (summer camp counseling). I spent all of last year thinking I was never going to turn 15 and now I kind of wish I hadn't.
I want to live but it's all so overwhelming and if I falter or let my parents see that I'm scared, they'll force me into the role of a small child and start treating me like a toddler or an animal like they always do. I just don't know what to do and I know it's horrible and selfish and disgusting but I just wish my mom would die. I can't live like this, it's only 3 more years but I'm just so scared. She keeps threatening me and saying I won't get into college or I'm failing high school because of how long I was out of school due to psych ward stuff even though she knows that not getting into college is my main fear- if that happens, I can't keep going. I know that I'm going to kill myself if I can't get into college. After that I'm still going to need to pay off student loans and I might not have my best friend with me (if I have him ill be okay and he says that he promises he'll try to live with me in college) and I just can't deal with that. I need to catch up on school and I need to learn to drive and then I need to get ready for my job in the summer and I need to make sure my grades are good enough for colleges to want me and I need to get people to like me and I just can't do it. I don't want to die but I feel like it's the only answer, I'm just not capable of doing this. I'm not supposed to be alive. I don't know what I'm supposed to do
Sorry about the rant you don't need to answer at all I know this is a lot
-🔆
Hey kiddo. Please please don't apologise for reaching out, I'm here for you and I'm always here for you, night and day my inbox and DMs are always open to anyone who needs to talk.
God, it sounds like you've had a rough deal. I understand where you're coming from. With parents, it's so hard when they don't do what they're supposed to do as parents and they don't understand you or believe you when you ask for help. It's awful and I am so sorry.
From the sounds of things, it sounds like you're putting a lot of pressure on yourself, as well as all that pressure around you. As scary as the future is, it isn't going to creep up on you one day. It's tomorrow and the day after that and the day after that and the day after that and every single day after that. You have time to breathe and rest and do whatever you need to do. You can't do everything at once, you're only human- and expecting yourself to do everything at once only caused burn out and stress.
Also, as a person who's gone through eating disorder recovery- weight doesn't stop you from passing. I promise you it doesn't. It's a good thing! It's a sign that all the work you've done recovering has paid off. I'm proud of you.
Keep your head up kiddo, I'm so so proud of you. Remember to take care of yourself, let yourself breathe and don't expect yourself to do everything all at once. I'm here anytime you need to talk.
Love you,
- dad x
4 notes
·
View notes
Note
YOU WROTE 18K BY HAND?? i am so impressed i need to ask what you are writing about. holy shit u are like a god
oh my god ok THANK YOU for asking !!! also in the time since you asked this, i have written another 1,400 words by hand. Anyways. under the cut bc this got. too long.
so this was originally for the 50k big bang project, but it was cancelled so i'm gonna go ahead and talk about it publicly now. SO.
the sparknotes summary: it is an iwaoi post-canon coming of age relationship study !! it's about iwaizumi in california and oikawa in argentina and how they navigate their friendship while long distance. it quite literally walks through every step of their journey from graduation aoba johsai to meeting again at the 2020 olympics....the sheer amount of time i'm covering is why its currently ~88,000 words LMAO.
this fic is literally my little monster. it was supposed to be 30k. then it was supposed to be 50k MAX. it is now 88 thousand words long. anyways though i'm enjoying it.
it's a slow burn get together, but it's also a break up & make up fic. the idea is that they dated in high school and then had to break up bc of the distance--but i think they're probably going to get together in the end. the middle is a whole lot of them growing up and figuring out how they can have a healthy friendship even as adults and dealing with loneliness and adulthood on their own and really coming into themselves as people by the time that they get to the olympics.
i just finished parts two and three, which is iwaizumi's years at university. here are some BANGER lines, if i do say so myself:
after oikawa's visit to california, when he has to leave again:
Oikawa smiles at him, and with that, he takes the handle of his suitcase and walks into the airport. Farther and farther and farther away, until he’s disappeared from sight and Iwaizumi is standing alone again, next to the blinking red hazard lights and the sound of other cars’ wheels on cracked concrete.
He gets back into the car. He doesn’t really want to talk to Rich right now, or any one of his other friends or teammates. He kind of just wants to be alone.
So he turns off the hazard lights and puts the car in drive and then he takes the long way home.
when iwaizumi is talking to his friends about oikawa:
“It’s not a big deal,” he tries. “We’ve both moved on. It wouldn’t have lasted while we’re in different countries anyway.”
He does not mention that Oikawa had asked him to wait. He does not mention that he is—he is waiting, and he doesn’t plan on stopping. He doesn’t plan on breaking that promise to come home.
“Ah,” Em says, subdued.
during a drunken NYE call:
Iwaizumi can hear the flinch in Oikawa’s voice. “You miss me?”
“I’m not saying it again,” Iwaizumi says, and it sounds like it’s supposed to be angry, but it just comes out tired and sad. “Of fucking course I do. You’re—”
“I’m what?”
Iwaizumi takes a shuddering breath. “You’re so far away, Tooru. You’re so far away and it makes me—fuck, fuck! I shouldn’t have called. I should—”
“No!” Oikawa says it instantly, desperately, cutting off any idea that Iwaizumi should go. Which is good because as much as Iwaizumi wants to escape the embarrassment of this phone call, he doesn’t actually want to hang up. He doesn’t actually want to leave Oikawa now. “Stay. Please. Stay with me.”
Iwaizumi pauses for a moment, swallowing down Oikawa’s words and turning them over in his head before saying anything else. “Okay. I’ll stay.”
anywayssssssss!!! it's been REALLY fun to write, but it's also like. an insane labor of love. this fic was my project for nanowrimo july of LAST YEAR, and it's my project again this year. isn't that crazy. so so so much has gone into this fic its literally driving me up the wall. it haunts my every waking moment and also my dreams.
but yeah i don't have wifi where i'm living for the summer, so i've been writing everything by hand and then typing it all up when i can use a hotspot on my phone. i also have the most amount of free time in my life than i have , like, EVER had in my non-child life. so i get to spend so much time writing, which has been sooooo fun. i am begging the universe to keep me from being burnt out bc i'm genuinely having the time of my life working on this.
ok phone's about to die gotta go. thank you for asking i want to talk about this SO bad. please feel free to ask me. please enable me i'm begging you
#ask#july nano 2023#i have opinions on the value of writing by hand. also enable me to talk about that. please please please
8 notes
·
View notes
Note
hi!
im soooo happy you're unflagged now, slutty chris as your pfp was something i missed a lot when i opened tumblr haha 🫠
anywayy, i was wondering what tips you have for finishing WIPs? like, i have about 6 of them that are pretty long already but each time i open one i write about a paragraph and get unmotivated againn
i really wanna post this multichapter ive been working on since january (it's a dad's best friend trope, if you're wondering 👀) but im writing one last chapter and nothing will come to me :(
do you have any tips for getting motivated or just general things that help you stay focussed?
Hey!
Same! It felt like such a long time 😫 (I mean, it was almost three weeks, so it kinda was a long time, but you know what I'm getting at)
Your wip sounds super interesting. I'm sure they're all devine. Sending you all the ✨️motivation✨️
I don't know if I have tips as much as I can tell you what I do (or what I try to do, at least lol), but anyway, here goes--
I usually don't have more than one "actual" wip at one time, I obviously jot down ideas when they come to me, but I'm not writing multiple full-fledged fics at once. I'm writing a fic, and maybe I'm working on some writing for Tumblr at the same time. Other than that, I just don't. I'm VERY tempted at times, but I force myself to take it one at a time. Even when it might be painful, lol.
(And I'm aware that I'm very privileged to have a brain that works in such a way as to let me write like that.)
Plus, as weird as it sounds, I've found the more I write with a single wip at a time, the more moving onto the next idea I have becomes a reward in of itself.
As far as finishing what I'm working on currently, usually I start with an outline, literal jot dots, for what I want the fic to be. Obviously, it doesn't always follow what I first put down, but there's an outline at least. Then, I go back and fill in that outline where I know nothing is permanent. I literally write the full fic in jot dot form. It just might be missing bits and pieces. It's still in jot dots. After I finish through the whole outline--expanding the ideas into actual writing--I go back, and I go section by section, removing the jot dots while reading for things I might need to change, things I might want to add, etc. After I get through the whole thing that way, I re-read it as a normal piece of writing. Again, changing or adding or removing things or whatever as I go. Then, I usually run it through a program like Grammarly or some shit to catch stuff that I can't catch (thanks dyslexia). Finally, I copy and paste it into AO3, reading it one last time, in a different font.
My schedule for writing on the weekend (soon weekdays, too... almost hello summer 👀) is to write for an hour after I eat breakfast. I'm a morning person, I get up at 6:00 am, then I sit on the couch with my laptop and type for an hour. Usually like 7:00-8:00am. Then I'm done. I'll come back to it tomorrow. It's a routine that's been my routine for a couple of years now, so I don't even really think about it. I just do.
(Also, obviously, if I'm in the middle of a scene or something, I write down what I will need for later, but I have shit to do, so I have to stop.)
When I'm in the middle of writing and I get stuck, usually I scroll back up to what I've written earlier and do some rereading. Or I scroll down and freshen my memory of where I'm trying to take this thing. Then, I integrate back into what I'm trying to write, thinking about the feeling I want to create, what picture I want to paint, what the internal world of the character I am writing is like (what is their "voice"), etc. When words won't come, I think about things other than words--if that makes any sense, lol.
If that doesn't work, rereading, I might take a breather. I drink a lot of tea, so I might go make myself some tea, sometimes thinking about what I'm trying to write, sometimes not. Usually, I get a lot of ideas the second I set my laptop aside, lmao. Or it comes to me when I'm pacing, waiting for water to heat up. Usually, because I write for an hour, I feel pressure to write the whole time, but I don't have to. No one has to do anything. It's all good. Take a breath.
A breather.
I also always listen to music when I'm writing. Almost always music with words but not always the same genre; I'm not just listening to horny music or whatever when I'm writing, so if I'm stuck, I might swap to a new playlist. Maybe one that is intentionally matching for what I'm writing--a more sexual playlist for smut, a softer playlist for romance, an upsetting playlist for angst, etc. Or maybe one that clashes, that always shakes something loose in my brain.
(Listening to straight fucking screamo when writing an intimate, quiet, fragile scene is objectively hilarious, too, so I entertain myself.)
Usually, when I write in the morning, I don't have as much trouble with my dyslexia because I haven't exhausted myself reading and processing the bullshit that letters and numbers do all day, but if it's just a bad day for whatever reason... I might swap fonts and try to keep at it. Usually, I write in Verdana, but I might swap to Comic Sans or something for a while.
Or, if I'm stuck because of dyslexia or anything else, I might just stop for the day. As a perfectionist and workaholic and, just, someone who you could not pay to sit still and not do something, I'm trying to allow myself more times where I can just stop. A lot of the time, I push through, though. I tell myself 10 more minutes, then you're done. A tangible goal can be good.
What really motivates me is getting the fic out. Not even necessarily getting it out and publishing it to AO3 and seeing people's reactions to what I create, although that is undeniably an incredible thing to experience. I feel compelled to write. I like the process of writing. And because I've accidentally created this rule for myself where I have to finish one thing before the next, I have to get something out to start the next. Editing is the WORST, but I will do it to move on to the next. That's just my workaholic nature.
It'll probably kill me one day... it's not the best. As a consequence, I will readily admit I forget what I've written CONSTANTLY. I don't re-read what I write once it's finished. I move on to the next idea so fast that I forget what I did prior until other people bring it up. I'm propelled forward with very narrow vision. Again, it's not the best, and I should learn to stop and appreciate what I've done. It's hard, though.
Also, talking to people about your ideas is always a good way to go. I should do it more, too. I find myself being a very selfish creator. I create from this place of compulsion. I have to get it out. I don't know why, I just do. It's the way I am. And I create alone a lot. I'm an introvert and a highly independent person, I like to be alone, and I like to make things alone. So, it's easy to fall into the same pattern of being private and only showing off what I have when it's fully finished, complete with a sparkling varnish. But that doesn't have to be the way it is. Share bits and pieces, talk about what you're doing, let other people tell you you're doing it! You're doing a good job! They're excited to see the next update, no matter how small!
If you can't/don't want to share, though, a fun way to bounce ideas around is going, okay, I have to make a list of [whatever number, 20, 50, 100, etc.] ideas. They can be absolute fucking garbage, all of them, but I am going to list out as many as I possibly can. If none of them are good, great! They're no longer taking up space in my brain. They're on this list. If one or two are good, great! You can build on those or warp them to fit.
I hope some of that helped, lol. I just tried to explain the way my brain works, and it isn't pretty, lmao.
8 notes
·
View notes
Text
Obey Me! characters as songs from Midnights by Taylor Swift
I used to assign Taylor Swift songs to the characters and now that Ms. Swift has dropped a new record I felt obliged to do this. Hi, it's me, haven't been around in ages but I'm still the same. I kind of lost interest in Obey Me! during summer but lately I've been coming back around to it again! How are you all?
Anyway, without further ado, read my assessment below. (There's also some glitch with the colors and sizing of the letters, I can't fix it without a new problem appearing.)
Lucifer: The Great War
Tore your banners down, took the battle underground
And maybe it was egos swinging
Maybe it was her
Flashes of the battle come back to me in a blur
Mammon: Paris
I'm so in love that I might stop breathing
Drew a map on your bedroom ceiling
No, I didn't see the news
'Cause we were somewhere else
Stumbled down pretend alleyways
Cheap wine, make believe it's champagne
Leviathan: Labyrinth
"It only hurts this much right now"
Was what I was thinkin' the whole time
Breathe in, breathe through, breathe deep, breathe out
I'll be gettin' over you my whole life
Satan: Karma
Sweet like honey, karma is a cat
Purring in my lap 'cause it loves me
Flexing like a goddamn acrobat
Me and karma vibe like that
Asmodeus: Bejeweled
Best believe I'm still bejeweled
When I walk in the room
I can still make the whole place shimmer
And when I meet the band
They ask, "Do you have a man?"
I could still say, "I don't remember"
Beelzebub: Sweet Nothing
Outside they're push and shoving
You’re in the kitchen hummin’
All that you ever wanted from me was sweet nothing
Belphegor: Vigilante Shit
I don't start shit, but I can tell you how it ends
Don't get sad, get even
So on the weekends
I don't dress for friends
Lately I've been dressin' for revenge
Diavolo: Anti-Hero
Sometimes, I feel like everybody is a sexy baby
And I'm a monster on the hill
Too big to hang out, slowly lurching toward your favorite city
Pierced through the heart, but never killed
Barbatos: Mastermind
What if I told you none of it was accidental?
And the first night that you saw me
Nothing was gonna stop me
I laid the groundwork, and then
Just like clockwork
The dominoes cascaded in a line
What if I told you I'm a mastermind?
And now you're mine
Simeon: Snow On The Beach
Flying in a dream
Stars by the pocketful
You wanting me
Tonight feels impossible
But it's coming down
No sound, it's all around
Luke: You're On Your Own, Kid
'Cause there were pages turned with the bridges burned
Everything you lose is a step you take
So, make the friendship bracelets, take the moment and taste it
You've got no reason to be afraid
Solomon: Glitch
I was supposed to sweat you out
In search of glorious happenings of happenstance on someone else's playground
But it's been two-thousand one-hundred ninety days of our love blackout
Here it is! What were your favorite tracks from Midnights? What do you think of the album as a whole?
I liked it, it's not my favorite Taylor album and it needed a bit of time to grow on me, but I think it's satisfactory. My favorite songs are Maroon, The Great War, Dear Reader and Mastermind. I really love all of the 3am tracks... Main album tracks are more of a hit or miss for me, mostly hit, but 3am tracks NEVER miss.
If you have any questions about my choices, answer my questions on just anything you want to say, feel free to comment :)
#obey me#obey me lucifer#obey me mammon#obey me leviathan#obey me satan#obey me asmodeus#obey me beelzebub#obey me belphegor#obey me diavolo#obey me barbatos#obey me simeon#obey me solomon#obey me luke#taylor swift#taylor swift midnights#midnights#meet me at midnight
31 notes
·
View notes
Text
vent post about medical stuff, do feel free to skip over this one
so i have psoriasis. pretty considerable psoriasis; it's on A Lot of me. and that gets me down, because i know how some people can be about skin conditions, even when they're not contagious (not that it should matter, people deserve to be treated like people regardless, but. still. i know how people can be.)
but in the back of my mind, there's been a little. shadow, i guess. just a tiny little voice whispering 'psoriatic arthritis' now and again. which i tried not to think about a lot, because it's not a guarantee that everyone with psoriasis will get it.
but, uh. i had an agitated eye the other day and didn't really know why, wondered if it could be psoriasis-related because i have a patch really close to the area that felt agitated, so i looked it up.
turns out psoriatic arthritis can come with sporadic eye pains. and recurring conjunctivitis, which comes by now and then whenever it feels like it. stiffness, but i'm not sure if that's due to weight or inactivity or what, i am overweight for my height and very sedentary so who knows. changes in fingernails, though that can be attributed to the psoriasis itself.
apparently psoriatic arthritis can happen at any age, usually after someone's had psoriasis for years (which i have) but— apparently it's most likely to really hit around 30 to 40.
i just turned 26, and the conjunctivitis has been an on and off thing for like a year or two. so... i don't know. i'd need to speak to a doctor to know for certain; which i'm fucking dreading, because trying to get a hold of a doctor about anything is like pulling teeth, and my local practice is pretty fucking useless about this stuff. (they had me on a wild goose chase when i was like 18 because they misdiagnosed me with ringworm, and i was the one who had to do my own research and be like 'hey i think i have psoriasis,' and i was the one who had to straight up say 'hey i want a referral to a dermatologist to talk about treatment options' and chase that up because no doctor ever did it despite the fact it's the obvious fucking thing to do.)
so... it's a scary thought. if i'm already showing certain signs at 26, and have been for a few years, and it typically really kicks in around 30, then— yeah, i'm worried.
and i know there's ways to treat things and stop them from getting as bad as they could be and manage them. ...when you can actually get a hold of medical professionals, anyway.
but it's all so fucking much, and i'm tired and i'm upset and i'm worried. psoriasis is a fucking nightmare and it's so much worse than just a skin condition because it's literally a thing where you can't so much as accidentally scratch yourself without your body deciding to fuck itself up to overcompensate for the 'injury.' it makes me miserable because it's the kind of thing that people stare at; i could wear shorts in summer, sure, but only if i didn't mind people staring and grimacing and saying 'oh but isn't it sore? it looks sore.' (it's not, by the way. it's just itchy.)
and as if all the self-image shit from that isn't enough (bearing in mind it's on my face as well so it's not exactly easy to hide) now it looks like there's a very good chance it might fuck up my joints one day too.
...i don't have a poetic or satisfying way to end this post. i don't even have a point for making it. i've been fucked up since eight in the morning about this and no matter what i do i can't cheer up because that voice whispering 'psoriatic arthritis' is louder than ever and i hate my body and my body hates me, apparently.
that's all. if you made it through all this, thanks. ♡
#delete later#probably#my health is getting me down so maybe putting it into words might help idk#this is very stream of consciousness so#don't mind it
2 notes
·
View notes
Text
I'm so concerned that I'll NEVER finish a novel-sized anything.
I mean, technically, I have. I've finished about 23 novel-sized things. It's just that most of them are shitty and the one that wasn't shitty was still... not very good. A very long process, this. But the idea is, I would like to end a story and have that story be good all the way through. This is the dream. Doesn't matter how good the ride is if it terminates in a brick wall.
So my BioShock hyperfixation has been gradually winding down for the past... oh, two months? I have managed to ease my fall by sliding down the fireman's pole of "adjacent interests." Anyway, I'm heading toward a drawer period with this story--totally normal for me. Having a hyperfixation for a literal fucking year is the weird part. Just six more weeks and it will truly be that old. Unfortunately, it's a sign that nothing is quite right in my life, but at the same time, I ain't wastin this fuckin impetus, ok
Now consider this.
A Summer for Saya. TMNT fic. Leorai. Exceptionally cursed. I've known how it ends for years. I have easily written about 150,000 words just trying to get the thing to the finish line. I end up skidding on my face into a compost pile EVERY. FUCKING. TIME.
At this point I've formed a goddamn complex about the dumb fucking thing. And by forming a complex about Saya, I've formed a complex about Uprising. I'm terrified I won't complete it correctly or worse--at ALL. There's a reason I haven't posted much of Uprising: I do not want to get hamstrung by feeling like there are Expectations. It's Expectations that get me most hung up--no matter how I try to push them out of my mind.
I know very well what I must do: ease up :) Relax :)) Think about what's gonna be fun. Forget everybody but myself. Turn on the good music (or none at all). Go to a strange, new, and/or comfortable place and write with a coffee and a biscotti. Follow my excitement, my passion, whatever interests me. Go re-read some old comic books. Just read some books full-stop. Try to get excited about it. And so on.
It's at times like this that I remember a scene from Rick and Morty in that stupid-ass "Get Schwifty" episode, where Rick tells Morty that he has to stop worrying because that just fouls up the creative process. Granted, the final product is, "Take a shit on the floor," which may be a sort of wisdom in its own way, but I can't even take the goddamn shit. It's impossible to trick myself. I have no idea what to do. I am my own worst enemy.
One of the problems that hit me with Saya was that its drawer period came RIGHT AT THE END. Just right there at the climax. I was just done. We needed space from each other. And every time I come back, I'm just not able to get back into the right headspace.
So right now I feel like I have got to try and finish Only Man before the drawer slams shut or I may hit the same horrible, impermeable wall. My biggest fear is that it'll turn into a forever wall. This forever block. My own ability to screw up my own creative process so goddamn badly that nothing ever ends and I'm just writing and writing forever.
It may be good for me on a private level, but I'd love to share my work someday, you know? I'm proud of these things for a goddamn reason.
5 notes
·
View notes
Last Seen Blogs
fyeahvergilxlady
VERGIL X LADY
malikturmcn
do it for love
chloroformg
Bi Drugged Hypnosis Ladyboys, etc. I love it all.