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live-laugh-lenney · 5 months

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interruption | arthurtv

hello!

not very good as following a routine or any kind of schedule so the posting of my writing will be rather sporadic... i do apologise but bear with me on that.

here's one that i've been working on for a couple of weeks, from a request that was sent in to my inbox, so i hope that whoever did ask me to write this enjoys it. let me know what you think and don't hesitate to send in your feedback or send in any ideas that you want me to write.

thank you! love to you all!

enjoy. x

Cosy.

That’s how she would describe Arthur’s flat.

Cosy and very him.

All open plan, with his kitchen melding with his living room mixing with his dining room, but so warm and inviting. A knitted throw-blanket folded and draped over the back of his sofa, that he always said was for show but he never scolded YN when she unravelled the fabric and threw it over her legs when she was curled up beside him, or took it to his bedroom when the nights were too cold for just a duvet and his radiating body heat. Books, labelled from fictional titles to nonfiction titles and autobiographies through to encyclopaedias sat on shelves attached the the walls of his living room, with photo frames of him and his family and wax burners filling in the gaps that melted scents of cinnamon and spiced orange, succulents draped down and in witty plant pots that his friends would buy him for Christmas. Lamps in every corner of his main living space because he felt that the main lighting was much too bright, especially for evenings spent at home with a good book that he’d brought from the bookstore on his outing into the city centre, or too bright for an evening spent at home watching a television show he’d been recommended to watch by one of his friends.

Where her flat was more in the centre of London, closer to where she worked in an independent coffee house which definitely challenged the Starbucks and Costa’s that were close-by, she became used to the sounds of passing cars and honking taxis and the distant sound of the overground squeaking on the rails as it approached its destination. The hustle and bustle of tourists passing by the entrance to her flat complex, shops on her doorstep, in an area that was full of high-rise buildings and overlooked a park that she spent many of the summery days sat in, with a picnic from Waitrose and a good book and with Arthur, enjoying the time together. So being in the part of London that almost instantaneously switches off in the middle of the evening, once everyone had travelled home and everything had shut up shop for the night, felt almost peaceful to her.

She much preferred his living space to her own…but she was sure that it was the feeling of being in the same vicinity as him that warmed her more than being in the flat itself.

On the evenings he would film with Alex and George and Cam, for a Chaos Crew video that seemed to be in high demand, she found herself dillying around his home and finding things to do until he was finished for the night. If it wasn’t cooking them both a dinner to eat once he was done, it was reading something from his ever growing collection of novels; and if she wasn’t reading a book, she was logging into his Netflix and watching a film to pass the time and, if she’d had a busy day and felt her eyelids sitting heaving, she would curl up and take a nap on the sofa until she was woken up with a soft kiss to the forehead or a gentle nudge into her thigh to wake her up.

But there was something about that evening where she just wanted to be near him.

They’d both, surprisingly, had days off that coincided with each other so they spent the day together and they came rarely and not very often - taking it in their stride and making the most of getting to spend quality time together.They went shopping down the strip together and spoilt the other whenever they saw them looking at something for a little longer than normal, they popped into her coffee house for a cream cake and a coffee and to say hello to her friends who were working that day, they went food shopping because his fridge was a little scarce when it came to ingredients for a dinner that was substantial and they shared a late dinner together where they sat at the dining table with a candle and some fizzy apple juice to impersonate wine because neither of them fancied a drink that night. But she knew their time together was inevitable and she couldn’t help but look at the clock as she counted the minutes down till he said he needed to film a new video - and she couldn’t complain because, well, she had spent the last twelve hours with him.

But, twelve hours just didn’t feel like enough.

She hated using the word clingy when it came to her relationship with Arthur but… she felt clingy.

Across the space of his living room, she swerved the sofa and dodged his furniture and tucked the blanket a bit tighter over her shoulders as the gentle breeze of her movements blew it from the bare skin showing for her t-shirt - well, not her t-shirt but Arthur’s t-shirt, yet she claimed it as her own and he couldn’t say no to her when he thought she looked beautiful in his clothing - and she made her way down his hallway to. Goosebumps on her legs as she left the warmth of the sofa but they soon disappeared as she got closer to his office door, accustomed to the chill in the air.

“You know when this guy is telling him to tone it down that he needs to take it down a level,” she heard Arthur remark, a gentle snicker following in suit.

“Uh, yeah, looking a little bit like a geek there… might want to tone it down,” George’s laugh came next, followed by a chorus of cackles and snickers from the other guys sat on the Discord video call.

“He’s got a fourth badge that’s just homophobic,” her boyfriend retorted back and at that, she rolled her eyes and an unsure smile on her lips because of the emphasis on the last word of his sentence.

She could hear that whatever they were watching on Youtube had been unpaused, ready to carry on before they took another break to add commentary content to the video, and her hand halted over the door handle to his office. Shuffling on her bare feet, the wooden floor of his hallway was cold beneath the pads of her toes, and she just couldn’t figure out the right time to poke her head into his room and ask him just how long he was going to be. She didn’t want to be a bother but the longing-for-him feeling, that sat low in her belly, was becoming a bother to her.

“It is kind of cute. I actually do kind of rate it, like being your own superhero and that… but it is the kind of thing you grow out of when you’re like six,” Arthur stated.

“Yeah, you’ve got to go as something recognisable surely, right?” Alex questioned and there were some gentle hums of agreement throughout that she probably would have joined in with if they were all sat in a room together and discussing that specific topic, “if you’re gonna go as anything at all.”

“What did you go as to Comic Con?” Arthur wondered, asking the question that everyone was thinking; “I went as Obi Wan Kenobi,” came Alex’s response and he was instantly met with silence. YN could just imagine the smirks and the grins and the laughter that were almost bursting to come to light from the three guys sat there, taking in everything they’d heard.

And YN took the chance.

The door handle squeaked as she applied pressure and the door creaked as she opened it, poking her head into the room, met with the sage green wallpaper of his office and the dim lighting filling the space that he used as background lighting - because he still found his main light to be too bright when filming his Youtube videos. He turned in his seat and let his eyes adjust, smiling upon her arrival once he saw her full figure standing in the doorway, the screen illuminating the side of his face and he slipped his headphones from on top of his head and down to his neck.

“You okay, lovie?”

“Just wanted to know how long you were going to be,” she hummed softly, almost too quiet, but she didn’t want to interfere with their recording because then he’d have been there even longer than planned, “I was gonna have a nap on the sofa but I won’t if you’re not gonna be too long.”

“I won’t be long, no,” he said, “there’s not long left of this video. Give me twenty minutes?”

“I’ll wait up for you,” she smiled, “mind if I just sit in here and watch? Promise I won’t make any sounds. I’m a bit bored out there on my own.”

Arthur smiled warmly at her, letting his eyes wander up and down her body as he took in her comfy appearance, holding up his pointer finger as he turned back to face his monitors and slid his headphones back up his head, setting them back on his ears.

“Guys, YN’s here.”

She could hear the muffled cheers through his headphones from his announcement and she grinned shyly, tightening the blanket around her shoulders, and she closed the bedroom door behind her before shuffling across the carpet. He gave his thighs a pat, inviting her to come and sit with him for a brief few minutes, and she quietly took him up on that offer as she blushed and nodded. He situated himself a bit more comfortably in his chair, unplugging his headphones so she could hear what was happening and moving any lingering wires so she could settle herself down on his lap without pulling any screens off of his desk. Curling up under his arm and bringing her knees to her chest, covering herself with the blanket draped over her shoulders, releasing a content sigh. She wasn’t bothered by her appearance on the screen because she knew he wouldn’t include any of what was happening, without her permission, in the final cut on Youtube.

“How have you been, YN?”

“I’ve been good, yeah. Ready for a sleep but you guys just had to come first tonight,” she smirked, feeling Arthur’s hand tuck beneath the t-shirt hanging down her frame, his fingers tickling up her side in a relaxing and comforting manner, “I feel I haven’t seen you guys for weeks.”

“You haven’t actually,” George remarked with a hint of feigned annoyance, a similar smirk sitting on his mouth, “spending all your time with Arthur now, aren’t you? Taking him away from us. We’ll have to fight for custody.”

She rolled her eyes with a grin and dropped her head into the curve of Arthur’s neck and his jawline, inhaling softly and breathing in the faint scent of cologne still left on his clothing, his arms tightening around her.

He was warm.

So warm.

His hands wouldn’t leave her skin. His arm stayed tight to her waist and his fingers traced soft circles into her hip, just above the waistband of the knickers that dug into her skin, and his free hand kept in its place upon her knee and he gave her a squeeze every so often.

“I’m letting you have him this weekend,” she hummed, “Platform Roulette, no?”

“I only get him when he’s drunk and annoying,” George frowned playfully, “you get him when he’s all cute and soppy. One can only dream of that interaction, used to have it all the time.”

“YN’s cute and soppy also so they’re practically a match made in heaven,” Cam cackled and YN felt the heat creep up her neck and settle across the expanse of her cheeks, “look at you guys, it’s just adorable and it makes me feel sick.”

“Cam, oh my god,” Arthur laughed, “you guys suck.”

“We love you both really,” Alex smiled, “you know we do.”

honestly, ending a story just isn't my forte... i just hate every ending i write.

anyway!

if you got this far then thank you for reading. means a lot to me that you've reached the end. please let me know what you think and don’t hesitate to send me any ideas you may have for future fics. my ask box is always open so don’t hesitate to send anything in.

lots of love to you guys! thank you! xx

#arthurtv #arthurtv imagines #arthurtv fics #arthurtv headcannons #arthur frederick #arthur frederick fics #arthur frederick imagines #arthur frederick headcannons #chaos crew #chaos crew imagines #chaos crew fics

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gothicscorpiohub · 9 months

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Lost you

Genre: Romantic–Thriller

Pairing: Marvel Loki x Reader

Overview: Just after Ragnarok happened, Loki along with his wife Y/n, who is pregnant for a while, is on his way to Midgard. What he doesn't know is the plan of Thanos in action against his to derive the tesseract.

Loki sits across the table on his cozy couch in his temporary room in the ship, rereading through the Hamlet, his gaze follows the distinct dark words the vintage papers of the book holds but his mind however isn't attentive of the fiction, rather it runs through the disturbing possibilities of the near future.

It was not more than a mere hour when he saw his sister Hela and Ragnarok burn his realm Asgard into ashes, he saw the place which holds thousands years of his memories, turned into ruins. Asgard was a place he never thought himself to be emotionally attached, regardless it was the not so un- unique place where he spent most part of his life into.

He, as an infant was brought up by Odin to Asgard, to his mother, Frigga. Asgard was the place where he learnt taking his first steps, it was the place within the walls of which the sounds of his first words echoed, it was the place which holds the memories of his first fight with Thor, which he lost badly, it was the place within where Loki learnt about his true heritage, within where he was broken, betrayed, lost, within where he collected himself, within where did he gathered the courage to win up against the injustices of the realm,

except the mother realm of his is no more.

He, after knowing his true heritage of Jötunheim, never considered himself an Asgardian, but now he can't help wondering how much he was attached with his realm Asgard.

The fight had an extravagant impact on everyone, it hurted that many lost their lives but more disturbing fact is that many lost their knowns, and many lost their everything.

The only and most important thing that mattered was the soundness of his wife Y/N. He was terribly terrified of her safety during the war, she was undoubtedly an incredible warrior but at present atleast, he couldn't take any risks, not when she's five months pregnant.

"Darling," he said relaxing his back to the couch, his deep honeydew voice rumbling through his chest like a melody as he felt an soft, firm hand squeezing his shoulder. He couldn't tell how comforting this small action of his wife Y/N was. "You're fine" she said through her quiet, soft, assuring voice while giving out a weak and tired smile. He smiled at his wife's understanding, she knew perfectly when he was feeling low and when he doesn't want to talk about it.

He stood up to her and guided her to the bed of their room, seating her back against the headboard and taking her feet in his lap while sitting in front of her in the suprisingly luxurious bed on the ship. He kept a soft hand upon her swollen belly and began stroking it lightly, a smile plastered on his lips.

"I wonder how well have I acquired the good deeds to have you as my wife, darling." He said softly to her, she smiled "I've to ask this very question to myself several times a day for you, my king" her stomach then grumbled slightly, enough for the young king to notice.

It was then it hit his mind, wide eyed he said "You, my darling, in the chaos of the war, haven't eaten anything in– in two days!" She chuckled slightly, feeling tired. She pulled Loki towards her with his hands (assertively not putting the slightest efforts in the process) and gestured him to sit beside her, he still objected, panicked from inside for this pregnant belly haven't had meals for two days. "Darling, pardon me, give a minute, I'll find something." Frantically, he said. Y/n couldn't help admiring the cuteness of her husband, before he could make a move, she held his hand firmly. "That may wait a while–" she spoke calmly, her calm demeanor always turned to calm Loki with the base of his heart, her voice makes him let go all of his problems, she makes him feel to let go of everything and just to live the moment, with her. "I want to rest, if I have your consent" she joked weakly, exhaustion dripping from every word she used. Loki, instinctively guided her to lay comfortably and covered them both while conjuring a warm fuzzy blanket.

Loki didn't remember himself relaxing his head on the headboard and absentmindedly stroking y/n's hair slowly while she rests her head on his broad leather covered chest, while she's on the brink of falling asleep, or perhaps in a deep slumber already. He smiled mildly at himself, taking in the sensation of being– saturated–with everything.

_______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

After a few hours, when he woke up, first thing his subconscious did was to take in the unfamiliar surroundings, it took him a while to remember he was inside a ship in space on his way to Midgard. Then, his gaze rested on the calm sleeping figure of Y/n curled in a ball, clutching her swollen belly and Loki's hands enveloping her securely.

Getting off the bed was quite an task if you didn't wanted your loved one who hasn't got real sleep in days to wake up from deep slumber. To be honest , Loki didn't wanted to get off the bed but, the circumstances weren't those to resemble rest, it was just not the time for it. He covered Y/n properly with blankets and instantly conjured the bag he had prepared with Y/n and settled out some packages of edible arrangements on the table, wincing at the remembrance of his wife not having meals for days and that too during her PREGNANCY.

"How's lady Y/n, brother?" Thor asked concerned. "She's resting" Loki answered

"Understandable, she's suprisingly very strong." Thor complimented, remembering her intellects while they were in the war.

"That she inconsiderably is." Loki spoke proud of her for the billionth time.

"I'd dare say, broth–" Thor stopped mid sentence, as if something has got his tongue. Loki looked up from whatever he was doing to meet the direction of his brother's eyes. Through the glass above the control panel, a space jet seemed to advance just against their space ship, protruding more and more with evey second passing.

Loki probably did knew what it was, and he wasn't proud of it.

He was here

To take the tesseract

To initiate a war

He was here,

Thanos.

______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Heya, it's my first Loki x Reader fanfiction. Do let me know of you like it. Shall I create a second part?

P.S. If you're wanting to talk to someone, I'm always here to hear.

Second part's out:

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wrenwrights · 7 months

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Konig Headcanons Part 7- Spicy October Texting

Oh my god! It's been forever since I've written anything, and this week has been nothing but terrible. Things at home got really bad for me, and my mother had to drive across several states and back just to pick me up and make sure I was safe.

I'm so far away from all of my friends now... I feel sad and just kinda burnt out, done. But that's okay, because I'm going to make things better and I'm going to make a better life for myself however I can.

First step: getting back into my writing.

Second step: unpack or commit a felony. I haven't decided yet, but looking at all my stuff, I'm leaning more toward felony.

Alright, enough said about that; I wanted to do something a little spicier for this headcanon since it's currently kinktober. I don't really write smut or naughty things, so this is good practice... and it feeds my addiction to this fictional man.

*Pssst! More HeadCanons Here!*

Now! To the headcanon!

***

Konig hated it when you were sent away on long missions. During the day he was fine; work around base kept Konig's mind occupied and off of how much he missed your smile. At night, when everything was still and quiet, was when Konig missed you most. In his bed, the empty space you had begun to occupy more and more only felt cold without you in it.

This mission had you away for a solid week, communication minimal and it left Konig feeling... heavy? Yeah, that was the best way he could put it. His heart felt heavy, his responsibilities felt heavy- even now, just laying in his cot, Konig felt as if gravity were slowly pressing down on him.

And then his phone lit up, casting his dorm with harsh blue light as your name appeared on the screen. At the sight, Konig's heart slammed into his chest. He fumbled for a moment; the sheets tangled around his calves as his large fingers slipped on the slick surface of his phone. Your message was simple:

Finally got a break. I miss you <3

Konig's heart was racing as he stared at your message. He wasn't much of a texter, preferring to ignore his phone entirely most of the time, but this was a message from you. A little note from you to him that he held it close to his heart.

I miss you too, Liebling. Are you safe?

That was always on the back of Konig's mind whenever the two of you were separated. Like a mantra whenever a quiet moment arose his thoughts swarmed of you, "Are you safe?" "Who are you with?" "What if you needed something?"

The ping of Konig's phone brought him back to reality. His jaw dropped open at your reply:

Perfectly safe handsome. Finished up early and got a hotel for the night.

An image was attached to your reply: one of you on your knees atop a hotel bed, your hair wet from a shower, and an overly large button-up shirt (which Konig suspected was his) hanging over your shoulders.

God, you were so beautiful.

There was heat pooling in Konig's stomach as he let his imagination run wild for a moment. With his eyes closed, he could see that dingey hotel room behind you; he could smell the sweetness of your shampoo. He could feel your soft skin under his fingers, feel the way you shivered at his touch. Konig could hear your giggle in his ears as he imagined kissing that one sensitive spot on your neck. Your smile lighting up the room between kisses.

It didn't take long for Konig's sweats to feel tight, for his shirt to feel suffocating and hot. It was frustrating, you being so far away and out of reach. It was a tease.

Going to bed now. I'll see you tomorrow morning <3

Oh, you were certainly going to see him, Konig would make sure of that. The moment your toes touched KorTac soil, you were his.

Come to my office for a debrief when you get home. That's an order.

He frowned at his message for a moment, thinking over his next move before replying:

Also, is that my shirt?

#konig call of duty #creative writing #fanfic #reblog #call of duty #konig cod #konig mw2 #konig x you #konig x reader #konig x y/n #writeblr #wrenwrights #spicy content #texting

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thephantomcasebook · 1 year

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i feel so lucky that tonight i discovered your tumblr page by chance as i myself huge huge huge fan of asoiaf and fire&blood fan and they are powerful distraction from my upsetting daily routine i need to get through. Therefore, i spend everyday daydreaming thinking brainstorming lots of things

my recent question mark in my head is about Jahaera and aegon the third situation. So in the book it says, jahaera and aegon were very very quiet very reserved and didnt spend any time together since their 2 or 3 year long childmarriage they both endured. And i am also thinking even children werent initiative, but they were also kept apart from each other . As regents and other powerful adults wanted to have more power and bigger chance to getting closer to the crown through marriage. And if jahaera or aegon needs to be chosen to get rid of , that would be jahaera in their eyes as jahaera being declared the heir and sitting on the crown could be a potential for other female heirs being set aside question their rights. Therefore i feel jahaera was chosen for to be killed instead of aegon , just because of the gender not because of whether this is green or black case.

Anyway i should just get to my question , in the book cannon, after jahaera’s suicide(murder), aegon the third reportedly give jahaera’s own doll to myrielle peake(hand of the king’s daughter)

this is sooo weird to me, and i genuinely dont think george martin just put it out that detail for no reason. Apparently in the book myrille played with the doll as if it was a real one so thats a obvious hint to how myrielle and her father the hand of the king wants myrille as queen very much. But what i can not understand is why the hell aegon had jahaera’s doll and gave it to myrille, like why did it have to be jahaera’s own doll

i feel you are so far the best person i ever read about understanding george martin and understanding uncovering things

do you have any insight into this detail in the fire blood book? Why would aegon give jahaera’s doll to myrielle when he could just gift brand new doll to myrielle? Its not like aegon the third would be short of money to buy a simple 1 doll.

and aegon the third and jahaera were said several tomes in the book how they had no contact no closeness nothing between them, they only sat quietly next to each other in formal royal events which was again so rare.

i wonder maybe that was not the case? Maybe they just started to be friends and hand of the king got scared and thats why he insteaf of murdering jahaera later he did it before aegon the third would get attached to her better?

And also what do u think of jahaera and aegon the third pairing in general? I love daenaera so much and i dont think daenaera made aegon feel anything negative but i feel jahaera and aegon could had reached deeper feelings whereas i felt daenara was superficial beautiful positive distraction

Hey, sorry I'm answering so late ... I usually take off from the computer on Friday-Saturday and then come back on Sunday Night - though I'm writing this at 4:30AM on a Monday Morning.

And, I feel you, times are pretty lean around here too on a personal level and as a writer I tend to retreat to fictional worlds - my own or others - to get through the day. Which is why I get sucked into Downton Abbey and HOTD. So, I got you ... you're among friends on that regard.

I'm not sure I've got an inside track to GRRM's thinking, though we tend to be kindered spirits in terms of writing tact and methods. I've just been a fan for a good thirteen years and used to get into the weeds with fan theories and the like.

I'll be honest with you, Aegon III giving away Jaehaera's doll like that really, really - REALLY - bothered me. It's a personal tick of mine, probably because I've always been a pretty poor guy and didn't have a lot of toys - I've learned to be a book and imagination kinda person. So, I get super sentimental about toys - especially dolls. And it twisted me up inside when I read that.

I would be wary of believing "Fire & Blood" because it isn't a reliable source of the actual events - it is written and sourced by many unreliable narrators with their own agendas. So, the idea that Jaehaera and Aegon III had no contact or closeness can't really be taken as fact when, most likely, the conspirators who murdered Jaehaera fucked with the records.

To be honest with you, Jaehaera and her death is another casualty of "Oh shit, this is gonna be part of a TV Show ... let me change this." Because, when I first read "A Song of Ice and FIre" and "Dunk and Egg" Aegon and Jaehaera where the parents of Daeron, Baelor, Daena, and the others. Daeron "The Young Dragon" was literally named after Daeron "The Daring" because he was the uncle of Jaehaera and a hero to the common people of Westeros. It made sense.

Now, I've come back to the fandom a few years to see that GRRM has got a Velaryon hard-on and that he killed off Jaehaera and changed it so that Aegon III ended up marrying his niece or some shit. So now, naming their eldest kid Daeron makes absolutely no sense other than perhaps Aegon III admired Daeron a lot as a kid, despite the fact that Daeron was the biggest reason for Rhaenyra's death.

I'm sad to say that the doll part is something new to me that I, myself, have only read recently and I cannot grasp for the life of me the point of that little detail, beyond, Aegon III was just trying to be nice. Though, I would subscribe to your theory that Aegon and Jaehaera were probably closer than the book lets on, close enough that he would keep her favorite dolly when she was gone and think it important.

I don't know, man ... that whole retcon to the end of the war bothers me a lot. There isn't a point to it other than GRRM trying to shoehorn in the Velaryons wherever he can to make them more important so that people will care about them in the upcoming show.

Also, I still have my first edition " A Knight of the Seven Kingdoms" Illustrated hardcover version that still has Jaehaera Targaryen as Daemon Blackfyre's grandmother and Aegon II and Helaena marked as his Great-Grandparents. And the post script that says that Aegon V (Egg) married his older sister, not a Blackwood.

#House of the Dragon #Aegon III Targaryen #jaehaera targaryen

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zu-is-here · 2 years

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Zu, how do you know who you love, or what you love romantically?

I always thought that I would love a man and that it would be true love, all that. I've always been a girl who likes Disney with Prince Charming and true love with fairy tales. Maybe that's also why I love Cream and Dark Cream, after all despite all the difficulties they went through, they always stayed together and love each other. But how do you know what you love ?

In the books, love is the butterflies in the stomach, it's wanting to see the person again even if it's only been 5 minutes since they left each other, it's having the impression that nothing else matters when that person is there.

But these feelings I never felt them. I mean, I've been in a "relationship" (if you can call it that, when you're a kid), but I didn't feel anything, I just did what adults do, I saw how happy they looked.

I thought that the fact that others when I was older were dating but not me was just normal, I'm not a person who talks easily to others, even less when it's people my age, so it's normal that people are not attracted to me. And then, I have already found beautiful boys but not to the point of imagining myself in a couple with them.

I told myself a while ago that I shouldn't really be attracted to men, but I'm not attracted to women either.

When people said they loved me or that someone they knew had feelings for me, I felt weirdly embarrassed, after all I didn't feel anything for them so how was I supposed to act so I didn't hurt them without playing with their feelings.

At the same time, I already knew people who wanted to put me in couple with someone, for them I have to take time, the love arrives slowly. And I know it's true, for some people it wasn't love at first sight, but they love each other anyway. But I can't really imagine myself with someone, I don't know why.

I know there is something called aromanticism, but I don't want to be that, or rather I am afraid to be that. If I'm aromantic, I could never be in love, I could never know what it's like to be in a relationship with someone you love. I know what I'm about to say is a bit shocking, but I'll just feel even more like a broken object.

First of all, you're not broken╰(*´︶`*)╯And not "a lonely half without the soulmate" either, let's leave it to fiction x) You're a holistic person with your own principles, interests, feelings and a right to choose.

Just because you're not in a relationship now, or can't imagine it yet, or not sociable "enough" to get one doesn't mean you can't love and be loved.

I believe it doesn't even matter if your partner will be a man or a woman, love is blind. Falling in love with beautiful boys is not the only right way either, cause the person you love is handsome to you anyway.

And to be aromantic, in my opinion, is about feeling fully comfortable without romantic love, yet you keep looking for it, even though it's not about your future relationship at all:

Everything starts with self-love.

Not with selfishness and total egoism (≧∀≦) But with accepting yourself without trying to be someone or with someone. Looking for love as salvation is also just a path to an unhealthy relationship.

Before giving love to someone, you should give this love to yourself. It'll take time to work on yourself, on your fears and resentments, especially on your relationship with your parents, but it'll help you a lot.

~Love at first sight~, like in fairy tales, sounds beautiful but is really dangerous.

You never know who a person in front of you might actually be, and putting all the responsibility for your happiness on someone you barely know by getting attached to them is, to put it mildly, weird.

That's why it's important to stay cool (and you're doing the right thing by remaining beyond feelings so you can soberly assess the situation úwù).

"Spark, storm, madness" usually end in failure, while true love does come quietly and slowly. To be honest, the best relationships often begin with "God, anyone but him" XD

And in this regard, Cream is a good example! (๑˃̵ᴗ˂̵)˚✧₊⁎ They don't fall in love at first sight, but Dream gives Cross a chance, hope for a prosperous future, and the opportunity to be accepted.

Circumstances bring them together, though they keep a distance between each other, but then they begin to spend more and more time together, and oops! Cross realizes that he's in love and that he wants to become a better person for Dream, while Dream doesn't reciprocate to the last.

Dark Cream is the next step and more about saving what you've achieved together so don't even try to save an abuser you barely know! :'D

So don't be afraid to give people a chance! (ówò)☆

You're not obligated to feel sympathy from the very first meet after all, and you can always stay honest with a person by saying "I need more time to get to know you better". Just take your time to look at the person, his attitude towards you, his actions for you.

And then, one day, you'll maybe catch yourself thinking that you don't really mind being with him. And it's not love yet! :D Just a next step with him proposing you to date. That's, though, the right place for butterflies, goosebumps and other little delights <3

Of course, you don't have to force yourself to be with a person if he's completely unsympathetic to you, even after so much time, as well as to start a relationship with him while you can't reciprocate. Your heart and your body know better, they won't lie to you ƪ(˘⌣˘)ʃ

Even while dating, it still doesn't mean your final decision: you just keep getting to know each other while being closer than before, and it may take longer before both of you are sure that you want to spend your whole life together.

Love yourself, listen to yourself and never betray yourself ★ You are loved already, for the good things are prepared for you ahead ♡ Best of luck!╰(*´︶`*)╯

#ask #tip

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thenightling · 6 months

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Ugh.

Okay, if you reply to this post, please remember to respect ALL spiritual beliefs. By that I don't mean "Obey" (and you f--king know it) I mean respect their right to exist.

Small vent. I was just in the comments section of an article claiming that "immaculate conception isn't what you think it is."

I read the article and it was pretty much clickbait about a pope in the nineteenth century saying that it's acutally about Mary being free of the stain of original sin.

There was someone on a feminist rant in the comments and mostly I agreed with their rant until they said Mary had no free will.

So I replied with "According to Saint Augustine the origin sin stain has to do with Eve biting the apple. You have to have free will TO sin. It's not that Mary can't sin, it's that she was supposedly born without the stain of Eve's sin that all mortals are born with." I made clear that, I, myself, don't actually believe in the concept of origin sin because I refuse to believe that a baby is born "tainted" by the sin of an ancient ancestor. Also I always felt the Adam and Eve story was a metaphor as the tree is the "Tree of knowledge." (Meaning they became intelligent).

Personally I like the interpretation described in Dracula: The Company of Monsters that they weren't banished from Edan. They had out grown it, like children leaving a nursery. They had inherited the world.

Well, the person felt the need to reply with "You take the Adam and Eve story literally? Lol! How very USian of you! Original sin is what seperates us from God's will." He also started to rant at me like he thought I was some die-hard Catholic he had to school.

USian?! Also it became pretty clear he hadn't actually read my comment before wanting to see himself talk.

Why is it almost every time someone argues wit me on Facebook the first thing they do is look at my profile and either attack my location, education, or worse how my eyes look. I can't tell you how many times I've gotten replies in mid-argument to the effect of "Oh, you wouldn't know! You can't even look directly at a camera when taking a picture!"

Yeah, I'm LEGALLY BLIND! I see, just not well, and my left eye is blind, the right doesn't see distance or small print very well and I can't drive. WHY does that automatically mean I "lost" an argument?!

And this wasn't the first time my being in the US was used like a "Gotchya!" I have alternating obsessions. One is Dracula (The fictional vampire) and Vlad the Impaler that is often attached to him as a backstory even though the connection in the novel is very loose. And once a supposed Romanian tried to insist to me that Dracula means "Son of The Devil." I replied with "Yes, in modern Romanian but in the fifteenth century it meant Son of the Dragon as he and his father before him were members of The Order of The Dragon." That earned a reply if "You wouldn't know. You're American and probably never left your own country." Why does that automatically mean I don't know what I'm talking about?!

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iamnotathornbird · 10 months

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so i posted something yesterday that i later decide to take down after i saw another tumblr post that i felt like was maybe calling me out for what i said, and i felt bad and wondered if i was unintentionally callous. and... i've been thinking about it all day and i still feel bad about it, so i want to clarify some things. i don't know if this is because my emotional response to things can be very different than what everyone else around me seems to act/feel sometimes, or because i just happened to be exposed to a lot of illness and death in my early years, so when it comes to people dying i feel like i tend to react differently than most people i interact with. anyways. i wasn't trying to be like, "jeez, it's so annyoing that angus cloud died so he can't film euphoria season three." that's not how i feel, and that's not what i meant, and i apologize for offending anyone in the fandom or any fans of angus cloud. when i posted about euphoria season three, fexi, and how angus' death IRL means that the character of fez is dead now, too, i wasn't trying to be weird or complaining about the show. for me, i don't have any emotional attachment to angus cloud as a person because i don't know him. i recognize that his death is sad, i feel bad for his family and friends that are left behind to deal with this loss, but it does not affect me the same way from an emotional standpoint, and my reaction to hearing about his death was similar to hearing that paul reubens also recently passed away.

however -- and i recognize that both euphoria and fezco are not "real" -- i do feel emotionally attached to the character of fezco. i've spent many hours over many months fangirling over fexi. i know he wears m&m pajama pants, watches little house on the prairie and have spent way too many times rewatching the NYE couch scene. none of this is real though. i know this. but i have no clue who angus cloud was as a person, and as a fan, i've always felt like it's okay to separate the character from the actor, because it's a role they're playing, and not necessarily who they are as a person (even if they may share similarities). so, just as i've genuinely cried over the deaths of other fictional characters (al giardello, dobby, finnick odair), who i also recognize are not real, it doesn't mean that i didn't feel genuine emotions over their fictional deaths. because, for me, it felt like loss, and brought up feelings that i've experience when people close to me IRL have died. if we never saw fezco grace our screens again because sam levinson decided to write him off of the show, or angus cloud got another acting gig, that would be one thing, and i wouldn't feel sad. but that's not what happened. fezco o'neill will never grace our screens again, because the man who so beautifully portrayed him lost his battle with mental health, and that is a tragedy.

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cyberexo · 1 year

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FAR, FAR AWAY | Kim Minseok x Fem Reader

"his eyes sparkled as though god had taken a constellation of stars and placed them within his beautiful orbs"

you can also find this fan-fiction on wattpad under the username @mrkswrld

word count: 1.2K

･ﾟ☆ 7

Minseok couldn't believe a damn thing that came out of Mrs. Jungs' mouth. Of course he actually believed her, but he had no idea how to process a fraction of everything he was told. Some may say he's overreacting, since it was all in the past, however with no closure the past is still the present. Minseok couldn't get over how eerie it felt, and how lonely you must've been for this to happen.

･ﾟ☆ backtrack

"I don't know how close you two were," she started off, Minseoks' heart was about to jump out of his chest, this was Y/Ns' home, Mrs. Jung was your mother, and now you're nowhere to be found, and to make matters worse no one had a single clue of where you could possibly be. Nothing was left behind from that day, nothing was left of you.

"But from what i've read, you've seemed to mean a lot more to her than you know," she continued whilst handing him the document you left on your bed a little over a decade ago, sticky note still miraculously attached. Your handwriting was all she had left of you, of course she made sure to keep it in good condition. "You can take that home with you and read it in your own time." to that Minseok nodded as he refrained himself from reading it all as he sat there in one go. Curiosity killed the cat and soon it was going to kill him soon, his fingers gently traced the hand written note, she's always had such pretty handwriting, he thought to himself as he remembered all the projects you did together for science throughout highschool.

"That day when I walked into her room to tell her dinner was ready like I normally do, her room... it was shockingly spotless, and she was nowhere to be found. I looked in every corner, crook, and cranny of the house. I went back to the school to see if she'd been sidetracked with an after school club. Even though I knew she wasn't, she'd barely leave her room unless it was to use the bathroom or for school, a club would be far greater than a miracle, but I still had hope. But when I found out she wasn't I did nothing but lose my mind. I went back home, drawers were empty, nothing on her pinboard about any plans I didn't know about. All her clothes... gone. She didn't leave me with anything to hold onto except for that document I found on her bed," She paused for a few seconds, the memory from years ago was still vivid in her mind, as if it was only yesterday that this happened. Her eyes were filled with nothing but sorrow and pain.

"At first I was so.. enraged, how could she leave me like this?! I didn't waste time when it came to the final words she left me, the more I read the more I felt my anger start to decrease in size. I was just numb, and shattered, more for her than for myself. I'm her mom, how could I have let her be pushed to this extent..." she trailed off, the hot waterworks finally started to part from her waterline. Years worth of pain finally escaping her orbs.

Minseok said nothing, he only gave her his full attention, a heart she could confide in, that's what she needed right now. He couldn't even begin to imagine what it was like to have this eat at her for an entire decade with no closure. he comfortingly rubbed her back, encouraging her to release her emotions and to take her time with what's left to be said.

She spoke in between quiet sobs, "I looked for her for days, but she was nowhere to be found.. for all I know she could be in another country. But, that's just what I like to think instead of a worse alternative," Minseok knew exactly what she meant, that you could possibly be dead. But he had a gut feeling you weren't.. you weren't that stupid to take all of your belongings and put an end to yourself.. unless you wanted to be completely forgotten. Now that would just be sick & twisted of you, he silently thought.

"Did you report her missing?" he warily asked, Mrs. Jung lifted her head up to look at him with her bloodshot eyes from all her crying. "If I did, you would've heard about it a decade ago.. I know, if I was so much of a good mother who loved her daughter I'd do everything in my power to find her but a part of me convinced my entire being to let her be, she needed to get away from here, somewhere far, far away. I was so scared, I still am scared, we live in a terrible world & I don't want to imagine what struggles she's been through on top of the ones she'd been through here. I just pray to god everyday that fate will bring her back to me... that you, will bring her back to me." she whispered that final part, eyes lingering on the wooden floor, waiting for an answer of any kind.

Minseoks' eyes were about to fall out of their sockets, "Me? you want me... to find Y/N? are you sure? I mean what if I'm not a good enough asset to find her? plus she could be literally anywhere on this planet right now-" she cut him off with a glare. "Minseok, you're the only person I know who was good to her whilst she was still here.. more than you know. I'm not telling you to bring her to me tomorrow morning & I don't want to hold you to any expectations other than for you to try your best. I have a feeling that despite this tragedy, you two are destined to be, or to least see each other at least one more time, please," she asked, voice cracking again, as fresh tears started to gloss over her eyes.

Even though Minseok was completely clueless as to how he was going to execute this, he gave her his word to do whatever it takes to bring you back home to your mother, and back to him.

･ﾟ☆

Minseok sat in his car, still trying to process everything that just happened, "At least it wasn't about that test I cheated on," he spoke to himself trying to cheer himself up. Looking to the car seat next to him, mind racing with all sorts of ideas of what could be in your document of last words before vanishing. The only way he'd find out is if he hurried his ass home, and for once, Minseok couldn't be more eager to be confined within the same white walls he always complained about on a normal day.

Except today was no longer normal, and no day after today was going to be normal. Not after everything he learnt about you today.

Soon you'll be within my embrace, and I'll never let you go, that was his final thought before he turned on the ignition and headed back home.

chapter 8

#exo minseok #x reader #kim minseok #xiumin #eventual smut #exo xiumin #slow burn #sort of #far far away

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wildernessuntothemselves · 2 years

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I’m late to give my two cents but I think the rape scene is a powerful element in the story. Beomgyu and oc were together since they were children and developed this unhealthy attachment that I don’t necessarily think is love. I think it’s more of infatuation and obsession imo. Of course beomgyu would feel so betrayed, furious, and straight up unhinged over the idea of her leaving him. He was always this cute lovesick guy, her wanting someone else was never a threat before. It almost makes sense that in that crazed state he would do the worst thing he could do to her (imo rape is worse than murder, pls don’t cancel me). At the end of the day he is still a yandere and even though he only wants to care for her and love her, he still is insane for her. That being said I do think he’s going to show how beyond remorseful he is, however, I don’t think he will need to do all that much for oc to forgive him. She is very sheltered and naive (and power hungry lol), but like beomgyu, is unhealthily infatuated with him. Knowing how deep they run for each other, it shows just how terrible rape truly is for even oc to run away. It literally broke apart the most obsessed, unhealthy kind of love there is. Though in the same breath it also shows just how unhinged their love is for her to go back to him after that (it also sheds light on how someone victims in todays world do go back to their perpetrators). I really like how someone before me said that she’s in love with the memory of him or something like that, it’s honestly the best way of putting it. This is a dark fic and I hope everyone knows that this is a work fiction and not what anyone condones irl- a very very well-written fic might I add 👀. I know that must weigh on you, mort but this is truly a great fic and I love the way you wrote it✨

It's okay I've always said that I'd rather be murdered than raped :'D i just can’t handle that emotional trauma :'D so i get you. Rape forces you to live with the consequences of someone else's actions, especially when that someone was someone you trusted and loved. That's gonna fuck you up. But if you die then at least you don't suffer anymore. Now obviously not saying murder is better. Just saying that emotionally I don't think I could take rape so I get what you’re saying

Other than that yeah I definitely agree with all that you said. Whatever they feel for each other is not sane. They're obsessed with each other. You can see that clearly in gyu so I won't talk about it but you can also see it in oc in the way she’s always thinking and dreaming of him. How she misses him even after escaping him and how she even thinks of him when she's intimate with taehyun whether sexually or when cuddling

Now I will say that often times the victim experiences these emotions but if given enough space and time, they could learn to heal and move on. I've seen it in true crime involvong a couple when one of the two is the bad influence and when they're locked up or away for some reason, the other person goes back to living a normal life but when the main perpetrator comes back, they relapse.

And ofc sometimes they go back to them willingly. And in oc's case, she has her own selfish reasons for going back other than just gyu. She wants that life of comfort and luxury. She tried independence and while it felt good to have the power, she didn't like what she had to sacrifice for it and Beomgyu is aware of that and will exploit it.

#i kinda went off topic there but yeah #mort talks #yamqn

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gofancyninjaworld · 2 years

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I got back into opm around covid, and found your blog because of it, I remember it being a show I liked back in 2016 when I was younger than Genos and thought I’d revisit it. I was living alone on my campus because of the pandemic and like? Being a sad young adult (now older than Genos) I ended up really getting attached to him and maybe that was my own folly, but his story of moving from scared and angry child to a more mature young person inspired me to do better especially when I felt like I was watching the world I knew burn around me. So, maybe that’s why it hurts so much and especially with everything else that’s happening in the states especially? It feels like the straw to break the camels back.

If everything should end, but someone gets one wish to turn back time, and people can be saved than well. I’d like that. I think “deaths” in fiction don’t have to be permanent to be impactful, in my personal sense. I can already imagine a world during the evil cyborg arc where Genos is going Hail Mary as he always done but this time Saitama has seen him “die” once and doesn’t want to repeat it. If that’s not the case, well, as others have said, I think I will be done. I don’t wish Ill on any of the writers or creators involved; but I do hope they understand that this feels cheap, at least for me. I can see how someone else can say that well at least he went out having done so much, but than what about tsunamki or bang; this feels just like something you would do if you wanted to be shocking more than thoughtful and maybe it’s because this story used to be a light in a dark place that it hurts so much. But, yeah.

Thank you for always being so eloquent in your writing. You’ve similarly always been such a joy to ask questions too even if I was always too scared to come off anon. So thank you.

It's okay. I've been cooped up at home this last week with the flu, so between being physically miserable, listening to the horrifying news that's been coming out of the Supreme Court all week, and my government's anti-democratic pushes closer to home, this chapter has been extra heavy.

Genos's struggles have never felt like they had a for-ordained guarantee of success and that made it real in a way most other depictions of struggle don't. But I didn't expect it to end here or this way.

We have to see where ONE is going with this though. Who knows? He may have a plan to redeem it all. Preferably without making anything seem cheap. But you know what? I'll take cheap if I get Genos back. I'll write nice long screeds about how furious I am to have my emotions toyed with while secretly going 'thankyouthankyou'.

#fandom grief

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insomniac-ships · 2 years

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Hi there- I’m someone who wants to be pro-ship, but I’m kind of struggling about it. I SINCERELY believe that thought crimes are NOT a thing. But I also believe that a person interacting with certain ideas a lot, like very intense things so much it’s casual, can become numb and insensitive to it (as an example not related to pro-ship topics, I think it’s uncool when people joke about suicide a lot to the point where it feels like they don’t take it seriously despite it being a serious thing)

Can you offer any thoughts on the predicament? Were you ever kind of at war with yourself about it?

Like, as a broader picture, how can a person align themselves with any particular idea any more when so many people are chomping at the bit to misinterpret or pull out the worst possible thing attached to that idea?

I’m not necessarily asking you to answer all that, just the initial two if you have time and are willing. I wanted to get these thoughts out there to someone who wouldn’t harshly judge and your blog seems like a safe place to do do

Hey Anon! I'm honestly really glad that you felt safe enough here to ask questions like this.

(This got awfully long, so the rest will be under the cut!)

I totally understand where you're coming from, and to a point, I agree. Thought crimes are absolutely not a thing, and no one should be punished for thoughts that they don't act on. The idea that thinking something is the same as doing that thing can be very, very dangerous. I also completely understand your concerns about desensitization to some absolutely horrific stuff. I think it's important to be able to take a few steps back and really get a good look at the bigger picture every now and again. That might mean having to stop and sit with yourself in order to kinda... recalibrate. That's probably not the right word, but oh well. Sometimes it's necessary to give your head a good etch-a-sketch shake and remind yourself that fiction is fiction and reality is reality. I hope I didn't get too far off track, there.

[I, personally, sometimes get so involved in a hyperfixation that it tends to bleed into other aspects of my life. That's usually when I know I need to give the gerbils on hamster wheels my brain a bit of a shake and step back for a minute. Does that make sense?]

I can't say I've ever necessarily been at war with myself over this stuff, to be honest. When I was a preteen/teenager and first really started using sites like deviantArt, Quizilla, FF.net, and roleplay forums, it was never a question in my mind whether or not the (admittedly problematic) stuff I wrote or liked reading about would have been bad in real life. I knew it was. But I was also very aware that what I was reading and writing was fiction. It was pretend. No real people were being hurt. Even when I was all of 11 years old, I knew that the art I was seeing of fictional characters was, well, fictional. Running into KakaSaku art at 12 never made me think it was totally a-okay to date a 26 year old at that age.

I grew up in the era of "ship and let ship", "don't like, don't read", and having full conversations with fictional characters in the author's notes of fanfics. I've always been proship, even long before it ever had a name. That was just... normal back then.

That's kinda why I'm not against using the proship label, even with its awful reputation. I know myself, I know my values and beliefs better than anyone else does (despite what some antiship folks like to think), and at the end of the day, I know I'm a good person. I don't send hate, I don't start petty arguments or drama, I do my best to respect boundaries, and I try to mind my business. If people want to spread misinformation and make up lies about what being proship is about, fine. I know my truth, and the truths of many others. If people have questions, I'm happy to answer. ♡

I, uh... didn't mean to get so ramble-y there. QuQ I really hope I answered everything in a satisfactory manner. Like I said above, if you have any other questions, I'll do my best to answer! ♡

#ask t.k.#proship #anti-harassment #dead dove #pro ship safe #whoops this got longer than intended #sorry about that!

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victorianoruben · 3 years

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{Untitled yet}

Ruvik X F!Reader

Chapter 1

Warning: none, I guess?

Written by: me and @another-bryk-in-the-wall

(thanks to my best friend for beta-reading it!)

Sometimes the hours are blurring together on nightshifts. Sometimes they are extremely stressful. Emergencies where there are only two people on a shift.

Other times you have 6 hours of complete rest and boredom.

That day it was the latter.

You haven't been working here for long and already find this hospital to be “different from others".

Many employees were emotionally cold and absolutely not interested in anyone, while just some liked to make jokes with you and treated you like a normal person. Also, the whole atmosphere here seemed very private. There weren’t too many patients who were going out of their way to socialize or make friends inside of the hospital. Hell, most didn’t even leave their rooms.

You sat bored in the lounge with your mobile phone in hand until you suddenly heard footsteps. They reverberated eerily in the long hallway and you turned to face that direction, startled. It was rare that anyone was wandering the halls this late at night. You saw a man in a tight red uniform aiming to walk past you, not even acknowledging your presence.

Only when you took a closer look at him, did you notice his burn scars. They were covering half of his face. When he noticed that you were looking at him from head to toe you decided to greet him, instead of just awkwardly staring at him. A relatively meek "Good evening, Sir" came out of you. You felt very overwhelmed by his dominant presence, which intimidated you a bit. That feeling only worsened when you let your eyes wander to the top of his head... Was that his brain surrounded by glass? No, that couldn't be. You were surely imagining things. But, what if you weren’t. Oh god damn it, what had he been through?

He emanated a unique self-confidence unlike anything you had ever seen in anyone with facial scarring. Usually patients like that were unsure and shy, afraid of being judged over something they had no control over. Human beings could be downright nasty to anyone with a scarred face. Something about facial scars disgusted people and the victims could clearly feel the contempt of others and as a result, they tended to lose all confidence.

This man, however, seemed to practically ooze confidence, which you respected and you caught yourself of being fascinated by or more like interested in his presence. You felt how your heartbeat rose from 0 to 100 when you both made eye contact, though you tried all your best to keep yourself collected and professionally polite. But that didn't work that easily.

"Good evening.", the man replied, his face completely blank and his voice monotone. He was just looking at you without a friendly gesture, without a smile. The man was simply studying your appearance as well. One of the many abilities he gained over the years was that he could read people like an open book, left open for him to peak in. Someone had longer fingernails on their right hand and short on the left? Guitar player who doesn't want to destroy the neck of said guitar. Some dog owners always carried treats with them, even if the dog wasn’t coming along. All those little clues told him enough about a person before they even spoke their first sentence.

But you. He couldn't read you yet, and this peaked his interest.

You hadn't been here for a long time, because he knew all the long-term workers and their darkest secrets.

"Are you busy right now?", the man pointedly looked at the phone in your hand, currently playing a silly cat video. Truth be told, he enjoyed that kind of content, but would he ad this? Never. Absolutely never. He would rather get the other side of his brain exposed than to admit that he liked cat videos.

"I need some help with my studies. Care to join me?", that was a big lie but he was curious -

Who were you and why did you peak his interest more than the average nurse in here? He'd find out soon enough.

Only now did you wonder what he was even doing here during these late hours. He didn’t look like a doctor. Was he a lab assistant? He certainly looked like some sort of scientist.

Pressing your lips in a thin line with a weak smile you put my phone in your pocket and nodded, slightly mortified that he had caught you watching cat videos of all things. It surely didn’t look professional.

"No, I'm not really busy. I’m just having a long boring night- I mean, not that I’m complaining... I wouldn't wish for emergencies either. So, yeah… I’d be glad to help you," You fumbled a little over your words, still slightly unsettled by his presence.

You’d do nearly anything to escape the boredom of a quiet nightshift, though. And you weren’t really worried about him being some kind of serial killer. Sure, your colleagues were weird, but they weren’t really the kind of people to chop you to pieces and bury you in the closest forest. Weird didn’t equal serial killer. Besides, you were curious about the man.

You were walking next to each other in silence that was quickly going growing awkward. Nervously you were fumbling with your hands in your smock overall, thinking of starting any conversation just to get out of this uncomfortable silence.

"I've never seen you before. I'm still pretty new here. Do you work here as a laboratory or doctor assistant? Also, with many nightshifts? Is that really that common in this mental hospital? " You had narrowed your eyes questioningly when you looked up to him. By reading his facial expressions it didn't seem like he liked to answer you. His forehead was wrinkling in silent contemplation, which made you suspicious. It was unusual to have an assistant running around here so late at night.

Maybe you weren’t so far of with the serial killer suspicions. You actually contemplated hightailing out of there.

'Quick, think of an answer. She is just a pretty and naive nurse'

But even a little slip up could cost his head. He could tell by her tensing posture that she was seconds away from fleeing the scene.

‘That could end badly’

"I mostly work nights," he tried to keep his answers short and to the point. Laying on a confidence in his answer that he didn’t actually feel. He made sure to look her in the eye shortly and casually avert his gaze back to the hallway. If he didn’t look her in the eyes at all he would look like a liar and if he stared at her too much he’d look like one too. It was a delicate balance, that he had mastered over the years "That is because the nights are quieter and I can focus on the patients better this way."

You took a glance at him, still wondering about what his actual job was. His answer was too vague for your taste. But the curiosity was still grown inside of you.

You had decided to work in a mental hospital because the human psyche had always been kind of a mystery to you. Mental illnesses were both fascinating and tragic in your eyes. The mind was even more delicate than the body, in your eyes. It was so easy to break and healing it was a true challenge. It was your goal to help people with mental illnesses like depressions, dissociative disorders and PTDS.

So, you really wanted to know what this scientist - or whatever - was working on.

You both arrived at the door to his office. You signed an NDA before, but who knew what could happened once you opened mouth. He didn't trust anyone in this damn hospital.

"Do not be surprised by the sight in front of you once I open this door. All I am asking you is to check the vitals of the patients in the bathtubs. I want to make sure they are doing well but I am not entirely sure how to do that.", he lied through his teeth, ready to push you into one of the bathtubs once the chance was there.

Or could you be useful to him in the near future?

When you entered his so-called office after his warning you had expected anything - but that!

Never in your life had you seen a machine this far developed... It looked like something directly taken out of a science-fiction movie. The construction filled the whole room. There were wires everywhere, all connecting to a weird sphere in the middle of the room. Completely gob-smacked by the strange… whatever that was you took a while to take notice of the bathtubs. When you did, though you froze up immediately. There were people - no patients - in lying in the bathtubs, connected to the cables, which were attached to the back of their necks.

Like a statue you stood there for at least 20 seconds. Staring at one patient, you slowly went to him just to check his state. Curious to see if he was aware of his surroundings or if he was unconscious – maybe asleep . What was this system?

Could that reach possibilities to help several people out of mental illnesses or was this just a machine designed from a psychopath just for his own use?

And why would he need help from just a nurse like you?

You let out a sarcastic laugh, "Looking at this huge thing… I highly doubt that you don’t know how to check vital signs ", you shook your head and crossed your arms, taking several steps back, out of his direct reach. No way would you let him put you into one of these tubs!

You really wanted to run away and never go to the hospital again.

"So, tell me. What do you really want from me? Do you expect me to go into one of the bathtubs? Gotta tell you, that’s not gonna happen. I mean... not to sound judgmental. Because technically this could be something to help our patients. But I gotta tell you, this,“ You gestured towards the patient that was laying in the tub right in front of you, “looks quite suspicious and not very save. I hope the patients volunteered for this, because if they didn’t I have to report this. Don’t get me wrong, you seem to be quite intelligent and this looks interesting, but I cannot allow something like this to continue without - "

"- You are annoying. All I want you is to check the vitals of the patients and you are throwing a whole speech at me.", he shot back, not amused with your behavior.

"I am a scientist, not one of your doctors. What I am doing here could change the world forever. It is a system which helps people with heavy trauma to forge new memories and get rid of the trauma. Do you understand me?", the scientist continued to spit out. There was a look of passion in his eyes that you hadn’t seen before. They had looked quite dull and emotionless up to this point. It was clear to you that he truly cared about that project of his.

What you weren’t aware of was that the man had a plan. He'd snow you . Make you feel comfortable. And then, he'd put you in the bathtub too. The next one on his list would be Tatjana from the reception area. And then it was your turn.

What even was your name? He chanced a quick glance of your name tag, just enough to read "(Y/N)" on it.

"Listen to me, (Y/N). This is a top-secret project. If I find out you talked about it outside of this room, I will make sure you suffer great consequences. And trust me, I have my eyes and ears everywhere. Now go and check on the rest of these people before I get angry. Then, you may leave."

Author's Note:

I'm still unsure if I keep making this as a slow-burn whole Fanfiction or just cut the whole thing I'm planing into single parts like One-Shots

#Ruvik #Ruvik X Reader #Ruben Victoriano #Ruben Victoriano X Reader #The Evil Within #TEW X Reader

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billiejean485 · 3 years

Text

Rewatched Ephemeral again and... well...

It still seems like the typical ordering of a Senti how they should act and why.

It's sad to see and realize that this boy had little free will to begin with. I wish I had seen it a mile away.

Maybe rewatching the whole show would change my mind but... I just finished doing that, and I'm not gonna do it anytime soon probably. Maybe I'll watch whatever I catch of the reruns on the TV.

I wish I had seen this a 1000 miles away, years ago, because I definitely wouldn't have gotten this invested in the show. If they didn't want to give us hints from way back then because of this, it was a real cruel and dirty move.

Am I angry with the creators? Not really I suppose. I'm just disappointed. Not in their way of telling things or anything... I'm disappointed in myself. How I defended a theory that was so far from the truth, how I thought this was about real humans.

Using a Sentimonster as an allegory for anything is alright in my book, I just..... I can't. This is devastating.

I can't even get my mind to think how the other characters in the show are going to approach this reveal, and how they're going to take it. If they get all happy-go-lucky and just cringey accept the fact like: "Oh, sure - you're absolutely validated as much as a human, because you're like one"... I WILL call that bad writing. If not, I'll stick just to see their reactions and how they're going to take it.

No, saying this is a children's show and that that would be too much is not gonna pass in my book. I've been in the Steven Universe fandom. I've seen groundbreaking approaches to all life problems from a child's POV, despite the show being about magical aliens. You don't have an excuse; it's just your way of writing things - some take it seriously, other like to throw hundreds of tons of sugar over it.

And that said... Again, I am not against Adrien being a Sentimonster. Definitely not my preference but... ultimately, it's their story, their decisions on who's what. I just regret I got this emotionally attached.

... I feel bad spamming the fandom here with my own opinions, especially given how old I am. I've always felt very close to fictional characters and everything that would happen in their world hurt me in the real one. Call that a mental instability on my point or whatever. I hate it when people use fictional worlds to promote bad values more than anything. It should be a safe haven, especially for the young public.

Not that I call this something like that. We have yet to see how all of this is going to play out. I still hang by that thread of hope that this is going to turn out awesomely in the end. I believed in the Miraculous creators a lot, held a lot of respect for them, and I hope they're not gonna let at least me down.

... See you in the following days. I still haven't figured how to accept all of this.

#miraculous ladybug #sentimonster adrien #sentiadrien #senti adrien #sentimonster #adrien agreste #cat noir #chat noir #sentimonster theory #miraculous ladybug ephemeral #ephemeral #mlb ephemeral #personal post #BillieJean485

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moosekateer13 · 2 years

Text

Chapter 4 Heartbeat:

1 week later.

I arrive in my office ahead of everyone else. I notice an enormous bouquet of roses on my desk with a note attached.

Y/N,

Would you do me the honour of joining me for dinner tonight? I'd love to get to know you better, darlin.

Regards, Jared

This is just the sweetest. Okay, I suppose one date won't hurt.

I quickly send him a text

Jared got your note and the lovely bouquet of roses. Thank you for both. I'd love to join you for dinner tonight.

Jared replies instantly

You've just made my day darlin 😃. I'll pick you up at your office at 6.

A call on my cell interrupts my thoughts.

It's Cole.

"Hey Cole, how are you doing? How's it going down in the USA division? Is everything up in order?” I asked.

" I am doing well and filming is going great. It's been a dream filming Will of the South in Wilmington. I love working with Jeff and Hil. How's everything going with Jared and Gen." Cole replied.

Will of the South, our latest movie, is historical fiction.

Clara Joan and Robert Keith. A prince fighting alongside the commoners. No one knows he's a prince. A fight breaks out in a bar. A bar wench named Clara gets hurt, and he takes her to the hospital. Then ensues a forbidden romance. Robert is already arranged to marry Constance Arthur. Now he's torn between his duties as a prince of France and his life with Clara.

" That's very good to hear. I know how long you've been wanting to work with them. Also, it’s been going surprisingly well on set over here. I was expecting things to go wrong." I said.

"Y/N, don't jinx yourself. Also, do you seem extra chipper today? Are you and Jared going out on a date?" Cole said.

I spit the tea I just took a sip of.

" You are always perceptive. Yes, I am. You can't tell anyone only Ce knows about."I replied while twisting a strand of my hair around my finger.

"I'll hide the key from the lock," Cole said with a smirk in her voice.

She always has this weird way of wording things. That's her way of telling me she won't tell anyone.

"Well, we better get back to work. Our offices don't run by themselves. I'll talk to you later, Cole. Take care and it was good catching up.” I replied.

"Same to Y/N and don't let anyone ruin your chance at happiness,'' Cole said before she ended our call.

Those words she said struck a chord and I felt it ring through my soul.

5:45 pm

I take a deep breath as I look at my reflection in my office's bathroom mirror. I picked a simple blue plaid shirt and paired it with a knee-length leather skirt. It's good that I keep a well-stocked wardrobe in my office. I hope he likes it.

I feel a familiar pair of muscular arms wrap around my waist. It interrupts my thoughts. I feel Jared's breath against my neck.

It takes me back to the night we shared at the convention.

"Sorry I barged in, but your door was open and I saw the light on in here. Ready to go on our date, gorgeous.” Jared said.

" Thanks, Jar, and I am ready to go," I replied with a smile.

He reluctantly releases me and takes his hand in mine.

I haven't felt this excited about a date in a long time. I feel like there is a set of eyes on me as Jared helped me into his truck. It's a closed set. Who would watch us? I am just imagining things. I shake off the feeling.

Jared takes me to this local retro dinner. Seems like he's done his homework. I did state in an interview. I prefer simple rather high-end restaurants.

He smiles at the sight of my eyes lighting up at the place he picked.

The waitress seats us at a booth in the back.

Jared tells the waitress we are ready to order. I raise an eyebrow at that remark. We haven't even looked at the menu.

"She'll have a swiss cheese bacon cheeseburger with an order of fries and a Dr. Pepper. I'll have a cheeseburger with lettuce, tomato and mustard and an ice tea. Thanks.” Jared said with a smirk.

" Very good. I'll be back with your drinks." Carrie replied.

"Okay Jar spill, how did you know what to order? I've never talked about the way I eat a burger in any interview." I asked.

Jared rubs the back of his neck nervously before answering.

"Okay confession, I did my homework and asked Cedrya,” Jared replied nervously.

I place my hand on his.

" I am touched. That is by far the sweetest thing any guy who has taken me on a date in a long time." I said.

The waitress places our food on the table. Jared and I talk about random topics in between eating our meals. We end up sharing a milkshake before he drives me home.

" I had a wonderful time and I look forward to our next date," I said with a smile.

Jared returns the smile. His dimples slightly popping out.

"I did too and I'm looking forward to our next one too," Jared replied.

His multi-spectrum hazel eyes bore into mine briefly. Before he places a light kiss on my lips. We reluctantly let go of each other before he heads to his truck.

I feel my heart skip a beat after that kiss. I feel it in my bones that this is the start of something wonderful.

And tonight, I wanna drive so far, we'll only find static on the radio

And we can't see those city lights and I love the way you look in a firefly glow

Saying everything without making a sound, with the

River rolling in the background, underneath a harvest moon

Standing on your shoes in my bare feet

Dancing to the rhythm of your heartbeat

We're dancing to the rhythm of your heartbeat, oh

Chapter 5:

#All Too Well #jared padalecki x reader #tell me a story bingo #moosekateer 13 #supernatural fanfiction #Mention of Cheating #Mention Of Break Up #Mention of Divorce #Lovers to Enemies #Smut #Angst #Fluff

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echo-three-one · 3 years

Text

Whatever It Takes

Sequel to A Forgotten Memory

Now facing an internal battle between her heart and mind, Samantha faces her fears and searches for the truth. Will she accept the past? Will she listen to her heart? Or will she let her memories get the best of her?

Chapter 10 to another story made by Ray (echo-three-one) Comments and Reviews appreciated! I hope you enjoy! Love you all ❤️

Previous Chapter : Roach - A SurPRICE Visit

What is this o.O

The Heart knows what the Brain Doesn't

Samantha Coleman

141's High Value Individual

Task Force 141 Base - General Shepherd's Office

The base was quiet. Everyone else fled off to their mission and all Samantha could think about is Alex. But why? Maxine told her he wanted to meet him, but Alex told her it's because she dropped her pendant. Whose story is she going to believe in? She could feel her heart beat differently ever since she saw him with General Shepherd. Her whole body except for her brain reacted to his presence. She even felt weak after slapping him, it's like her brain commanded it but her hands wanted to disobey. Who is he?

Maxine passed by with an apple she got from the kitchen counter.

"Sam, you okay?" she asked, biting the fruit and sitting in the chair across from her.

"I've been thinking… about how you knew Alex and how she knows me…" she sighed, it was relieving to let out all her bottled thoughts, especially that now they're both alone.

"Well, we met in a bar. Had a few drinks then showed me a photo of you." she said, holding her hand.

"I honestly believed he did know you and tried to lengthen the conversation, just so I know he's good enough and knows a lot. He actually aced the test but he was very drunk when I told her to meet again. After that He showed up the next day and I had to work. Whatever happened after my shift was- ow." she interrupted herself because of a minor pain from recalling her memories. She still hasn't been able to remember all of them, even after a lot of sleep.

"Yeah. That's about it on your side. Mine's just that… He looked creepy, his eyes felt like he was looking for me in a weird way and so I ran. After that life continued. You went on a leave and I resumed working." She supplied, staring at the grey walls of the mess hall.

"I wish I'd remember where I went on that vacation. It'd be cool." Max commented, crunching on another bite.

"My heart… beats differently when he's near. It's like he's really familiar." She whispered.

"Oh. Someone's been struck by the Cupid. He is attractive though. Without those ink, he'd probably be your type." Max teased, winking at her and nudging her. Samantha was serious, though.

"Look. I admit my heart feels something for him. It's a mix of guilt and longing. But why would I long for someone I just met?" She sighed and dropped her head on the table, groaning as her mind and her heart battled against the inconsistencies.

"Look. It's not too crowded here. Maybe we could do some research by their library!" Max suggested, creating finger guns and humming the Mission Impossible theme song as she stood up and went to the library. Samantha chuckled.

"So we're spies now?!" She placed a hand on her forehead as she followed her wacky best friend.

Maxine typed down Alex on the search bar, his public profile appeared and they began reading his file. It was all basic ideas, Nationality, Height, his name was redacted and they couldn't bypass it so they just ignored it and headed to the next term.

"CIA Agent Alex helped locate and detain CIA Mole." Samantha read with her mouth. Maxine quickly clicked the article and photos of her appeared on almost every page.

Unlike Maxine, these notes didn't hurt her mind except it hurt her heart that she treated him that way, after all this time. He was there to save her. He located you through Maxine to save you from the same captors that played with your brain months ago.

"Ooooh. It says here you two were safely housed in a remote safehouse for almost a month. Really Sam? Maybe something happened within that time? Can you please remember how he looked underneath those clothes. For me?" she giggled. Samantha knew she was joking but it was an honest possibility.

Could it be that she fell for the guy that saved her and sat with her for almost a month? Or the two of them fell in love? Her heart was racing as the possibilities overloaded her brain, her cheeks started to blush as her thoughts consumed her. This wasn't her mind talking to her, it was her heart. It's reminding her of Alex.

"Oh. Shit." Maxine muttered and Sam snapped back to reality, putting her hand on Max's shoulders and looked into the screen once again.

Due to a special favor promised by Samantha's father, he has authorized to apply an MK Ultra procedure to her, whose main intention is to Alter her memories of the IP Address along with the events that happened prior to kidnapping.

"You agreed to forget him?" Max looked at her, a frown formed as she started to console her.

"I guess so… Maybe something happened between us." She sobbed. She didn't want to cry, but the realization set in on her. They met, they bonded and she forced herself to forget him. No wonder Alex felt sad after being slapped.

"I want to ask him about us." Sam said with determination. Maxine liked the confidence but was also concerned about her feelings.

"What if you wanted to forget him, that's why you did it? Would you be ready to feel the sadness all over again?" Maxine asked. Samantha paused for a while. She made sense but her gut is telling her to push through her initial plan.

"I'm sorry Max, but I made my choice. I have to know everything about us, Whatever it Takes." she said.

"I'm here to support you. After all, you're the only memory I have left. They took everything. I don't know why but my memory began when I moved in. That's where my story started. Maybe there's a reason for it so, here I am for you. You're my family." she said, hugging her tight.

"Well, you could add a few more people in your family." she smiled.

"Yeah. It's full of tough looking brothers ready to protect us. And one soft Gary." she noted.

"He is a sweetheart, huh?" Samantha asked, getting a hint of something else from her.

"Well, he talks a lot and he gets me sometimes. It's a shame he's always out there saving the world." Max chuckled. Samantha froze.

"I know you want this to work..."

"This is our proposed digital art for our ad…"

"... and I know in my heart that I do too…"

"The colors need to be more vibrant!"

"...but I can't live loving you with worry in my heart..."

"I'm staying a little bit longer, See you tomorrow!"

"... and I don't want to be the reason that you'll stop saving the world. I know you want that. It's your job to. It's what you built your whole life to become..."

Her head started projecting two realities, it confused her. Which was right and which was wrong? She knew the work one was right, but the memories she just made right now while crying in front of Alex made more sense. Which was real? Which was fake?

"Sam! You okay?" Maxine snapped her fingers and Samantha blinked rapidly.

"I'm going crazy Max." she panted.

"What's wrong?" she consoled.

"My memories. They're all wrong. Why did I agree to this?" Samantha continued breathing heavily.

"Well, for starters. It's to forget that IP Address you memorized as a kid."

"But why did they change the recent ones too? Did I decide that my time spent with Alex is worth forgetting? Did he break my heart or did I break his?" She sighed. She knew for herself that she was unable to love again because of her loss, but what if Alex made it right for her? Alex did something that helped her move on? That's why her heart felt yearning for him?

"Sam. I'm no love doctor but if this really bothers you, you should talk to him. I have no idea when they'll get back but I'm looking forward to your resolution." She patted her shoulders and gave her a soft hug. Samantha felt like crying, but why?

After a while, Samantha actually had the courage to ask about Alex's whereabouts. Word has it that he's being redeployed to Germany to investigate another alleged Augustus base and that they had no idea when he'll be back.

This worries Samantha because they already heard about a transfer of authority, which in simple words meant : You're leaving the base. And that meant she won't see Alex anymore.

Maxine and Samantha sat on their beds at the infirmary to recover once again, both of them fell quiet as the news they got started to bother them. They already got attached to the people in the base and were sure that they're going to miss them. All they could do is hope that the team gets home before they leave the base.

“You think Alex will be okay?” Samantha shifted her sleeping position to Maxine, who was still awake humming to soothing melodies. Maxine shifted to face her too and smiled.

“You’re worried.” She teased, making her smile and giggle.

“Well, my heart told me I have to worry…”

“That’s normal. And don’t you worry ‘bout a thing… He’s a tough guy, remember? He’s trained to survive such harsh conditions. That’s what his file said, right?” She reminded Samantha, giving her an assuring smile. Samantha shrugged off her worry and closed her eyes. She started to imagine what it felt like being with him, based on information from his file. She can’t help but smile at her crazy idea. She felt like a teenager all over again, obsessing herself on fictional characters she watched on TV, since she could only base his personality on words alone. But she did remember how his cheeks felt, from the slap, and placed her palm on her cheek as well. It felt like he was with her and her heart felt excited as she awaited for his return.

Next Chapter : The Berlin Tower

NOTIFICATION SQUAD MY BELOVED ❤️

@smokeywhalee @enderio @samatedeansbroccoli @whimsywispsblog @beemybee @ricinbach

#omg the picture I'm Sorry I tried #codmwfic #whateverittakes #alex echo 3 1 #simon ghost riley #john soap mactavish #john price #gary roach sanderson

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