the first half of incident in a ghostland: wow this is somewhat compelling what’s going on what an interesting look at trauma and trauma responses and how trauma can break a family

the next half of incident in a ghostland: what the fuck am i watching

I loved Wild Blue Yonder, I thought it was a great episode. But if I see one more person proclaiming that the Doctor saying Isaac Newton was "hot" made the character "finally queer", I'm gonna set fire to sth.

For one thing, since they changed into a woman, the Doctor has, depending on one's definition, been canonically genderfluid/trans/nonbinary/genderqueer. That was made even more explicit last week in Star Beast. So saying that the Doctor as played by a man and using he/him pronouns calling a man "hot" somehow made the character queer is stupid in and of itself.

And secondly, the Doctor has long been regarded as aro and ace-coded by people of those communities and guess what? Aro and ace people really do exist and we are queer. And it would be lovely if other queer people could stop excluding us by saying that characters who provide what little, mostly accidental and incidental representation we get "become queer" by expressing same-sex attraction. It happened with Good Omens and it seems to be happening again with Doctor Who and I am so fucking tired of it

Edit (6th Dec 2023): Several people have pointed out in the notes that there have been quite a few instances of the Doctor ambiguously or indeed unambiguously expressing 'same-sex' attraction and exploring their gender identity/identities in the past, both in the show and in extended media. I just wanted to be absolutely clear on the fact that I was in way trying to diminish the importance of those moments by emphasing the aspect of asexuality and aromanticism in my post. That is not to say that I think anyone was implying that I was doing that, in fact everyone's been lovely (which is why I also wanted to thank everyone for their input, I learnt a lot, especially about the novels!!)

Of course, as an asexual, aromantic and agender/nonbinary person, that is the lens through which I watch the show and relate to the character of the Doctor. This does not make my reading of them any more or less valid than anyone else's. In fact, I absolutely love the fact that the Doctor is a character who speaks to people of so many different queer identities and I am so happy that RTD is exploring their queerness more explicitly, building on what he and so many other writers and also the actors have already established. I just hope that the fandom will respect the aro and ace aspects of the Doctor's queerness the same way they do their gender identities and other sexual and romantic orientations. Part of the reason I was initially quite worried about this was because of my experiences in the Good Omens fandom, particularly post series 2, as indicated in my original post. The other is that I doubt the show will explore the aro and ace aspects of the character as much as they may other queer identities - unfortunately aspecs have a history of being left behind in this regard...

But we will see, maybe I'll be proved wrong! For the time being, I just hope the queer community can celebrate all the different facets of the Doctor's undeniable queerness, including the aspec ones. And as the reactions to this post have been overwhelmingly supportive (I don't think I've seen a single outright negative response), I think this hope is far from unfounded.

(Sorry, this edit turned out to be longer than the original post...)

franz kafka’s writings are often analyzed in a trans lens the person who wrote that was almost definitely a trans person who related. people who call kafka a trans woman are almost entirely trans women. there is also a huge subset of literature shitposter girls who use kafka and the metamorphosis specifically to talk about their experiences with womanhood. so while i agree that the trope you are talking about is antisemitic i don’t think that applies here. he’s not being called a woman in a disparaging way.

It. Literally. Doesn't. Matter.

Spoiler alert: trans people can be antisemitic!

Franz Kafka was a real person who died not too long ago, and just because a trans person relates to his writings doesn't mean they can claim he's trans. It's not the same as relating to a fictional character. You can't 'headcanon' an actual person. I don't care how much you relate- he wasn't trans, don't call him a woman. He was an actual person, not a fictional character you can project on. An treating Franz Kafka like a fictional character you can project any label onto and separate him from his actual life is dehumanization and *also* antisemitic.

It's no different than queer people co-opting Anne Frank's memory and erasing her story to just herald her as a "bi icon" when she never had the chance to live long enough to label herself. Queer gentiles need to stop dehumanizing Jewish people and turning them into blank slates they can project onto.

Kafka's Metamorphosis and writings about his depression are from the viewpoint of a disabled Jewish man who was watching as antisemitism was slowly escalating around him and Jews were becoming insects in the minds of society. And "he's not being called a woman in a disparaging way" is the dumbest excuse ever- antisemitism is antisemitism. I've seen trans people infantilize Jewish men, calling them "different breed of man" or "scrunkly" and then insist they meant it positively. Intent doesn't matter. Calling a Jewish man, who never ever indicated having any gender identity otherwise, a woman, or implying he's somehow not a full man, is antisemitic.

I just saw Dune Part 2 (2024) with some friends so here are some Thoughts i guess

I feel like on the whole these movies are trying to either downplay or cut out a lot of the misogyny/sexism in the book, although Herbert's view of gender roles is so pervasive in the book that it's hard to change without completely changing the worldbuilding (the Bene Gesserit especially) and/or certain characters and getting second-order effects that weaken or change the main plot. But they did a good job at least making it much less in-your-face and offensive than in the book. One of Chani's lines is about how "men and women are equal" in the Fremen, and while I don't really think that's supported by how the movie depicts Fremen I can see and respect where they're coming from

It's still a very male-dominated movie, but it's honestly pretty faithful to the book, and like--what are you gonna do? It's Dune. You can't exactly just genderbend Paul and get the same story, at least not when the Bene Gesserit are still what they are

wait now i'm thinking about an AU where the Kwisatz Haderach turns out to be a trans man. ideally you'd get both the canon critiques of white savior mythos/the Messiah trope and a deconstruction of the sexism and strict gender roles of the society of the Dune universe. also ideally you'd get a whole bunch of other queer characters in the same AU. you could also do an AU where the Kwisatz Haderach/a potential Kwisatz Haderach turns out to be a trans woman, or even nonbinary, but i feel like those would make for very different stories cuz AGAB/ASAB seems to matter like A Lot in the Dune universe

the movies did manage to completely get rid of the homophobic parts of the Harkonnens' characterization though. i did like that

although it was still using disability/deformity as shorthand for Ugly Evil Guy which :/

but enough about the Problematic Elements(TM) let's talk about the actual story

Chani was a lot more politically and generally assertive in the movie than I remember her being in the book, although it's been A While and she was also very much a Main Character who had thoughts and opinions and importance outside of the male characters she was affiliated with (as much as anyone can escape the political black hole that is Muad'dib but) AND! she actively advocated for Fremen self-governance in the beginning! although she didn't keep it up cuz she got sucked into the Paul black hole. this may have happened in the book it has been like two years since i read the first book and it was very disjointed reading cuz College(TM). I also liked the ending part, where it was implied that Chani was leaving, on her own, because she was angry with Paul, which implies More Character Development. (Also they didn't seem to do the Fremen polygamy/concubines thing in the movie, which was a good call, i feel like that part of the book was maybe informed by anti-Arab racism)

Jessica was incredible, of course. Love me a good ruthless woman. Her main character trait/motivation was definitely Paul's Mother but her main personality trait seems to be incredible ruthlessness. there is no madonna/whore complex to be found here no sir

(i may be wrong about that part but eh)

And of course the Harkonnen Blood reveal. the story definitely sets up Atreides as The Good Guys (fair, just, merciful, looking out for and caring about the people under their rule) and the Harkonnens as The Bad Guys (cruel, unjust, power-hungry and traitorous), which makes the reveal that Jessica and Paul have Harkonnen blood an incredible symbol of Paul's corruption arc. He goes from "I must do anything possible to avoid the holy war" (the Atreides way) to "CONQUER ARRAKIS AND ELIMINATE ANYONE WHO STANDS IN MY WAY" (the Harkonnen way) over the course of...technically years, in the book, although that wasn't super well communicated in the movie I feel--in the movie it was only months, cuz Alia hadn't been born yet by the end. And right before we see the worst of it we end up learning that Jessica, his mother, was a daughter of Baron Harkonnen. Jesus fuck.

there's definitely some Not Great elements about using ancestors/blood to determine morality but still

princess irulan was introduced! as an independent character and actor in her own right oh my god! although she still falls prey to the sexism infusing the original material

the dune books (at least the first two) are in this weird state where there are very strict and specific roles/walks of life that female characters are allowed in (domestic/family life and religion) and men dominate Everything Else and nobody every questions that, not to mention the whole thing about how apparently even the very female religion/psychic field is supposed to be dominated eventually by This One Man who can do it better than all the women, and yet all of the female characters are well-developed and feel like people. ykno aside from the complete lack of protest in being shoved into a sexist role

anyways irulan got more development than i remember from the books, i loved that, and that we got her POV too. these movies are really working to uplift and spotlight the female perspectives that were often somewhat sidelined in the books and i love that

also stilgar's (blind?) faith REALLY came through which i liked

overall, yeah, the movie was great. it's very faithful to the spirit of Dune while addressing some of its flaws/datedness--it understands what its message is and what it's saying, and the way it's constructed really hammers home the critiques of imperialism and racism the original was built on

I think this is gonna end up a trilogy, based on only the first book, and it very much seems like the third (and final?) movie is going to specifically focus on the war against the Great Houses after the Emperor falls, which iirc was kinda glossed over in the book/between Dune and Dune: Messiah. I can't wait to see what they do with it

as an extension of how hera reads as trans to me, hera/eiffel resonates with me specifically as a relationship between a trans woman and a cis man. loving hera requires eiffel to decentralize his own perspective in a way that ties into both his overall character arc and the themes of the show.

pop culture is baked into the dna of wolf 359, into eiffel’s worldview, and in how it builds off of a sci-fi savvy audience’s assumptions: common character types, plot beats, or dynamics, why would a real person behave this way? how would a real person react to that? eiffel is the “everyman” who assumes himself to be the default. hera is the “AI who is more human than a lot of humans,” but it doesn’t feel patronizing because it isn’t a learned or moral quality; she is a fundamentally human person who is routinely dehumanized and internalizes that.

eiffel/hera as a romance is compelling to me because there is a narrative precedent for some guy/AI or robot woman relationships in a way i think mirrors some attitudes about trans women: it’s a male power fantasy about a subclass of women, or it’s a cautionary tale, or it’s a deconstruction of a power fantasy that criticizes the way men treat women as subservient, as property. but what does that pop culture landscape mean in the context of desire? If you are a regular person, attracted to a regular person, who really does care for you and wants to do right by you, but is deeply saturated in these expectations? how do you navigate that?

I think that, in itself, is an aspect of communication worth exploring. sometimes you won’t get it. sometimes you can’t. and that’s not irreconcilable, either. it’s something wolf 359 is keenly aware of, and, crucially, always sides with hera on. eiffel screws up. he says insensitive things without meaning to. often, hera will call him out on it, and he will defer to her. in the one case where he notably doesn’t, the show calls attention to it and makes him reflect. it’s not a coincidence that the opening of shut up and listen has eiffel being particularly dismissive of hera - the microaggression of separating her from “men and women” and the insistence on using his preferred title over hers. there are things eiffel has just never considered before, and caring for hera the way he does means he has to consider them. he's never met someone like hera, but media has given him a lot of preconceptions about what people like her might be like.

there’s a whole other discussion to be had about the gender dynamics of wolf 359, even in the ways the show tries to avoid directly addressing them, and how sexual autonomy in particular can’t fully be disentangled from explorations of AI women. i don’t think eiffel fully recognizes what comments like “wind-up girl” imply, and the show is not prepared to reconcile with it, but it’s interesting to me. in the context of transness (and also considering hera’s disability, two things i think need to be discussed together), i think it’s worth discussing how hera’s self image is at odds with the way people perceive her, her disconnect from physicality, how she can’t be touched by conventional means, and the ways in which eiffel and hera manage to bridge that gap.

even the desire for embodiment, and the autonomy and type of intimacy that comes with it, means something different when it’s something she has to fight for, to acquire, to become accustomed to, rather than a circumstance of her birth. i suppose the reason i don’t care for half measures in discussions re: hera and embodiment is also because, to me, it is in many ways symbolically a discussion about medical transition, and the social fear of what’s “lost” in transition, whether or not those things were even desired in the first place.

hera’s relationship with eiffel is unquestionably the most supportive and equal one she has, but there are still privileges, freedoms, and abilities he has that she doesn’t, and he forgets that sometimes. he will never share her experiences, but he can choose to defer to her, to unlearn his pop culture biases and instead recognize the real person in front of him, and to use his own privilege as a shield to advocate for her. the point, to me - what’s meaningful about it - is that love isn’t about inherent understanding, it’s about willingness to listen, and to communicate. and that’s very much at the heart of the show.

LGBT literature of the 1860s–1910s. Part 5

After a long pause, the list is back! Here we have a couple of plays, accounts by two trans women, lesbian poetry, and more.

1. Despised and Rejected, by A.T. Fitzroy (Rose Allatini; 1918). A pacifist novel published during World War One? With gay and lesbian characters? Yes, that was sure to get people in trouble. Its publisher was fined and the judge called it “morally unhealthy and most pernicious”. So, Dennis is a young composer who hates violence and therefore refuses to go to war. He also suffers because he is a “musical man”, that is, gay, and loves Alan, art-loving son of a wealthy businessman. His friend Antoinette, meanwhile, is “strangely attracted” to a woman. Nevertheless, the two attempt to love each other. When the war begins, Alan appears in Dennis’ life again, and they try to avoid being sent to the front together. Alan also persuades Dennis to accept who he is. Edward Carpenter himself defended the novel, saying that “the book is also a plea for toleration of a very much misunderstood section of humanity”. Read online

2. Autobiography of an Androgyne, by Ralph Werther (1918). Ralph Werther, also known as Jennie June, wrote this autobiography for doctors, and it is very revealing. Being a New York fairy (male prostitute) and possibly a trans woman, they tell frankly about the city’s gay underworld of the early 20th century and their personal experience, which is sometimes too frank and dark perhaps, but all the more interesting. Read online 

3. Poems by Mikhail Kuzmin. Kuzmin was not just the author of Russia’s first gay novel, but also a poet. Many of his works were dedicated to or mentioned his lovers. I’d recommend Where Will I Find Words (in English and Russian), Night Was Done (both in English and Russian), from the 1906-1907 collection Love of This Summer (available fully in Russian), mostly based on his love affair with Pavel Maslov in 1906. And also If They Say (in English and Russian), which is a great statement.

4. The Loom of Youth, by Alec Waugh (1917). A semi-biographical novel based on Evelyn Waugh’s older brother’s experience at Sherborne School in Dorset. It is a story of Gordon Caruthers’ school years, from the age of 13 to 19, and it is full of different stories typical for public schools, be it pranks and cheating exams or dorm life and sports. Although the homosexual subject was quite understated, the author implied that it was a tradition and open secret in public schools. The book became popular and soon caused a great scandal. Worth noting that before that Alec was expelled for flirting with a boy.  Read online 

5. Two Speak Together, by Amy Lowell (1919). Lowell was a famous American poet and lesbian. Many of her poems were dedicated to her lover, actress Ada Dwyer Russell, specifically the section Two Speak Together from Pictures of the Floating World. These poems are infused with flower imagery, which wasn’t uncommon for lesbian poetry of the time. Read online

6. De berg van licht/The Mountain of Light, by Louis Couperus (1905-1906). Couperus is called the Dutch Oscar Wilde for a reason: this is one of the first decadent novels in Dutch literature. It is also a historical one, telling about a young androgynous Syrian priest Heliogabalus who then becomes a Roman Emperor. Homoerotism, hedonism, aestheticism: Couperus creates a very vivid world of Ancient Rome. He also covered the topic of androgyny in his novel Noodlot, which was mentioned in Part 3 of this list. Read online in Dutch 

7. Frühlings Erwachen/Spring Awakening/The Awakening of Spring, by Frank Wedekind (1891, first performed in 1906). This play criticized the sexually oppressive culture prevalent in Europe at the time through a collection of monologues and short scenes about several troubled teens. Each one of them struggles with their puberty, which often leads to a tragic end. Like in The Loom of Youth, homosexuality is not the central focus of the play, but one character, Hänschen, is homosexual and explores his sexuality through Shakespear and paintings. The play was later turned into a famous musical. Read online in German or in English

8. Twixt Earth and Stars, by Radclyffe Hall (1906). Though it wasn’t known to many at the time, these poems were dedicated to women, some to Hall’s actual lovers. Read online

9. The Secret Confessions of a Parisian: The Countess, 1850-1871, by Arthur Berloget (published in 1895). This account is similar to the Autobiography of an Androgyne, albeit shorter. The author nowadays is thought to be a trans woman. They describe their love for women’s dresses, the euphoria from wearing dresses, makeup and wigs, the life as a “female impersonator” in Parisian cafe-concerts, and their love affair with a fellow prisoner. The autobiography is not available online, but you can read it in Queer Lives: Men’s Autobiographies from Nineteenth-Century France by William Peniston and Nancy Erber.

10. At Saint Judas’s, by Henry Blake Fuller (1896). This is possibly the first American play about homosexuality. It is very short. An excited groom is waiting for his wedding ceremony in the company of his gloomy best man. They are former lovers, and this short scene is not going to end well… Read online

Previous part is here

So imagine this: Someone makes a webcomic. It's a slice-of-life about some 20-year-old and their relationships, mostly comedic, some drama, mostly realistic but with a few fantastic elements. Think Questionable Content or similar.

But a month in, it introduces a new character, who then joins the regular cast. The comic then splits.

There's two versions of every day's comic now. One where the new character is a woman, and one where they're a man. They're the same person in each, with a minor name change. Neither of them is implied to be trans in the story, as far as everyone can tell they're cis, and the comic itself never brings up that they might be trans or anything about their gender, any more than it would for any other character.

But their gender being different affects the story. Even in a webcomic full of left-leaning 20-year-olds, not everyone is bisexual/pansexual. They end up in different relationships because of their gender, people are attracted to them (or not) because of their gender, other people are jealous or friendly towards them in different amounts, because of their gender.

The two comics start out very similar, with differences being mostly relegated to what name they're called, and how they're drawn, but as it goes on, it diverges further. Because people are in different relationships, events end differently. Maybe two characters end up together in one comic and not in the other, because one of those characters dates the Gender Difference character in one of the worlds. The two characters who end up together might move away from the rest, leaving the comic. Maybe different relationships mean different people are at different events, and maybe some of that drama ends up someone getting killed in one comic and not the other.

So the gender thing is never brought up in-universe, but to us, the reader, we can see how things are different due to the sole change, the gender of this one character. Which brings me to one, final, question:

Queerness and the House of Usher (spoilers!)

See I just added these Thoughts to the tags in @quecksilvereyes 's post but now I have Feelings too

TFotHoU (or HoU, as I will refer to it here), as expected from a Mike Flannagan show, has a bunch of Queer Rep™ to talk about. HoU is, also, about remarkably evil people - amoral capitalists who'll step over anyone if it means they'll get something from it. And look! Some of them are queer! Kinky too!

That's bad queer representation... right?

The show isn't that clear when stablishing sexualities, but we see that at least three of the Usher kids - Napoleon, Camille and Victorine - have same sex SOs/assistants with curious job descriptions. Prospero's taste for orgies probably implies queerness too, but honestly I don't remember if he gets it going with any guys in the story. I honestly have no idea about Tamerlane's voyerism thingie and Frederick is the only one with a "traditional family" going on.

Unrelated, but: Leo is definitely cheating on his bf Julius. Completely dismissing about his worries for him too. And for his cat. That's objectively evil, clearly. Vic literally killed her fiancée Alessandra, though she didn't stuff her under the floorboard, which is an L when compared to Poe's original. Cam doesn't believe in true love. Perry blackmailed his sister in law. Mean. He's also got a surprisingly high kill count for the family's disappointment, but since unlike Roderick he only killed rich people, we stan. I don't belong in Kinky spaces so I haven't got a big take on Tammie, only that - well, she's completely dismissing of her husband and sees him as a prop, just like the sex worker she hires.

Huh.

See, the nature of a story called "the fall of X family" is that X family is going to be the main character. The title kinda implies that they're falling for a reason, ergo, they're despicable fucking people. And they're queer! They're very queer. Many flavors of gay. They're the main characters, and they're monsters, and they're gay.

No, that's not bad rep.

Queerness as a movement, a community and a theory is very focused on scaping a cisheteronormative society's binaries (ie man/woman, husband/wife, public/private) and creating living conditions to those who fall outside of these categories - mlms and wlws, the trans, the nbs, the aros and aces... we are all queer, strange and estranged from this weird and limited worldview. And so we create a community for ourselves. It's very focused on care and anti-stablishment. Since a cisheteronormative society tends to be very white, rich and western, it's also focuses on anti-racism, anti-capitalism, anti-imperialism. Y'all know that, this is Tumblr and we love leftist Discourse.

I also know many, many gay people irl who are not like that at all. Libertarians, anarcho-capitalists, terfs, completely apolitical people and the like. Sexuality at it's core is personal, not political, so there are gay people out there who are perfectly comfortable with their sexuality on an individual level but do not see the point of getting involved in the broader context. They're queer, but are they...?

Well—

Not to mention there's lots of asshole gays out there! Don't you have a shitty ex? Have you never been almost run over by a drunken butch who blew cigar smoke into your face? I have! Life experiences are just like that. Maybe you should touch more grass. You'll probably find a lucky gift from your neighbour's dog, who is an astrology-obsessed bisexual and also really hot but stopped making out with you at a party once she found out you're a pisces (the neighbour, not the dog).

(Granted, none of this is as bad as implanting an experimental heart contraption into the fiancée you just killed because she dared to have ethical principles and then being so consumed with grief you stab yourself in front you'd your dad but you know how it goes. We're not the 1%.)

My point is, queer people are people. We are complex. We fuck up, and sometimes there's still times to fix things and sometimes... there isn't. We're consumed by jealousy and regret and sometimes we're so locked into our own head we stop believing the rest of the world is real too. Just like any other people, because unfortunately, queerness isn't a sign of morality.

And even if queerness does mean community, kindness and acceptance, tell me... Where the hell would the Usher kids get those from? The people around them are not really peers – they're ass-istants, blowjob-giving apartments, orgy mates, heart surgery providers, hired fitness moneybags, perfect housewives. Even if the partners are all shown to care for the Ushers, there's still a distance, a power gap, that makes the relationships fundamentally wrong.

And the partners? Arguably they're the good queer rep in the show, but look – even when Julius and Alessandra are shown to be good people (or at least people with an ethical boundary), they're not the good gays, they're simply the good SO's to a family of psychos. Exactly like Bill and Morrie, who afawk are straight people.

Which leads us to HoU's parameter of morality - Auguste Dupin. He refuses to drink the Amontillado, symbol of all the Usher opulence over the years. He got screwed over by the Usher twins and by the Raven herself, but he refused to cave in (except for the informant part, admittedly). He's not a good gay guy; he is gay and he is a good man.

The fundamental difference between our show's main tragic yaoi couple isn't that Auggie is a happily out gay man (and therefore is good) while Roderick is a sad divorced hetero (and therefore is bad). Auggie is the richer man because he is a good man; he has a spouse and children and grandchildren he loves with all his heart. He has a family and a community and he has found a sort of happiness no money can buy. Roderick owns the world – but what does he really have? What do his children even have? How could they ever build communities for themselves if they were never in one? Their father made them compete for his love. He never nurtured their bonds, he just showered them with money and excess until it was too much for them to handle. Juno herself pointed out - they were never a family. The House of Usher was only that. A house. It is empty and soulless.

What is queerness without a community? How could the people who represent the relentless corporate normativity and cutthroat capitalism ever be good queer rep? How can they even be queer?

Hear me out: on the most individual, simple level, being queer is still about not fitting in. These kids are bastards. They are are PoC and women in a predominantly male and white dominated space. They're on top of the world, but they're still outsiders to their own House. How could they not be queer?

And yes, I know this discussion takes a different turn when it comes to representation in media, but it's not like Flannagan fell into a Hays Code-era flamboyant villain trope. Queerness is just there. Just like Victorine and August are both black people in (arguably) the opposite ends of the morality spectrum, there are queer characters of many kinds here. The story just happens to be about the fucked up ones.

HoU is a poignant critique of capitalism and a surprisingly funny adaptation of Poe. We'll judge it by that. It happens to be queer – more things should be.

Cotton Mendings — a WIP intro by yours truly

finally doing a proper introduction yayy!! who would have foreseen this .

stage: drafting (rip it's been so long and it's going soo slow)

tags: #wip: cotton mendings ; #aes: cotton mendings

genres: historical fiction, literary fiction

themes and tropes: idealisation and romanticisation of people, queer love and toxic queer relationships, friends to lovers, tenderness and love for the world, hope, grief, obsession, mythological and religious imagery, breaking out of other people's perceptions of you, relearning gentleness after having it beaten out of you, being loved as being known

warnings: emotional abuse and implied/mentioned physical abuse, character death and mentioned animal death, period-typical homophobia & transphobia (will add on)

pov: 3rd person past tense

setting: 1920s England

summary: Oscar ignites a relationship with an old friend – charismatic socialite Salvatore – whom he has had repressed love for for years. But despite everything their relationship is haunted by the death of Oscar's brother and a portrait simply called Percy, made by a German artist: a portrait of a red haired man who appears perfect and soft and yet incredibly, beautifully tragic. It makes Oscar question Salvatore and their relationship and wonder about the life and seemingly inherent sorrow of the subject, while Salvatore grows ever more enticed by ruthless, enigmatic Yvonne. Their separate obsessions grow and push them apart, while at the center of everything is Percy, devastatingly alive and spiteful, trapped in a narrative he did not create. Who is Percy, who is Salvatore, who is Oscar in rotation to them? Does he want to know at all?

characters, notes, excerpt & taglist under the cut <33

characters:

Oscar (he/him, bi): world's #1 most pathetic sad boy. romanticises everything to the point of self destruction. scared of acting on his desires but full of soooo much love. obsessive, incredibly sensitive, artistic, melancholy. also sooo autism.

Salvatore (he/him, bi): charismatic, intelligent, flamboyant, philosophical, hedonistic. he sees everything in a very realistic and nihilistic way. emotionally detached yet surprisingly protective and gentle with the people he loves.

Percy (he/him, bi, trans): babyboy !! baby!!!!!!!! full of so much life and love and poetry. he is very sweet and sarcastic and loves going on little adventures. mentally ill & physically disabled. he's suffered more than jesus but his wonder and whimsy are unmatched.

Yvonne (she/her, bi): hot evil woman❤️ ruthless, vicious and cold. her love is almost violent and repugnant. she only cares about few people but if they are in danger she knows no morality or law. also she's mischievous like a little cat <3

notes: Cotton Mendings is my passion project, my Magnum Opus, my baby. I have worked very hard on it and I've developed the character dynamics and symbolism sooooo much I could talk about them for hours. It all started with the song Angie by The Rolling Stones, but it has strayed very far from its original concept (actually Angie isn't even on the playlist — it is now completely a product of my obsession with The Smiths I'm afraid). It has helped me through so much and I will be very happy if people like it :] I love my horrible insane bisexuals. Why is everyone bisexual, you ask? well. I ❤️ bisexuals.

excerpt:

He thought again of Percy, of the way he glowed as if coated in honey and sunlight, the sweet smile on his face. What if Percy had spent his life failing at it, too? Trying to be the perfect picture of a beautiful boy. Turning hazy and translucent, like a ghost, from trying. And those few minutes with him, how the light extended and held Oscar too, how Percy was perfect and beautiful but couldn't possibly be only that. How they were both an image without a body.

(general) taglist: @ribelleribelle @talesofsorrowandofruin @writing-is-a-martial-art @alexwritesfiction @aether-wasteland-s @sculpture-in-a-period-drama @phantomnations @olimpias (ask to be added or removed)

DAN HIBIKI from STREET FIGHTER

JUSTIFICATION:

"Although I personally headcanon them as nondysphoric genderfree (as in lacking gender in a fluid, free, whimsical way) I can see so many cases for Dan to be a trans woman or transfeminine nonbinary it's not even funny. To start off, although their appearance is heavily based off the very masculine Ryo Sakazaki and Robert Garcia (albeit chubbier than the two), their personality is based off the very much a tomboyish with a girly streak girl Yuri Sakazaki. In addition, starting from IV onward, they say lines that very much imply they lean in a transfeminine direction, albeit without changing their pronouns like an onee character (those characters are typically transfeminine or transfeminine coded) would. For instance, in one of their winquotes to C. Viper, at least in English, they say "you're a businesswoman? That's what I do too!" Implying they at least partially see themselves as a woman. Street Fighter V takes this even further with lines in the shop quotes (they run the in game shop) implying they have worn schoolgirl skirts, implying they want to wear a bikini, and even saying "You know who would look hot as a woman? If you guessed me, give yourself ten points!" in reference to the Demitri costume Ed has as DLC. The Japanese version of this quote takes it a step further with them calling themself a "number one bijin" in reference to the costume, with bijin being a gender neutral leaning feminine term for beautiful person. I rest my case." - @sunkern-plus

Reminder: Submissions are always open!

I absolutely HC Chihiro as a Trans Woman. The whole "He was so brave to want to work out and be more mainly" plot line reads to me like desperation to not be perceived. Like literally stating, "he was happy as a girl, and good at it too." And then back tracking with uh oh everyone is gonna know your secret better beef up so no one makes fun of you... Or worse...

And then she outs herself to Mondo who immediately kills her. Like valid fear.

People don't want to admit Chihiro is legitimately trans because DR is so checking bad at representation and is in many cases actively homophobic (especially in THH). Admitting the nature of Chihiro's relationship with gender identity and expression asks some really tough questions about the rage Mondo felt that caused him to commit murder. Not to mention the clearly queer subtext happening between Mondo and Taka, can easily be implied as internalized homophobia brought on through social expectations and his role in his gang being brought into question.

Suffice it to say, I feel a personal pinch in my heart when people refer Chihiro as he. Although it isn't explicitly stated in Canon I feel like to continue to call Chihiro he actively goes against what the character is and is implied to represent

I'm against headcanoning Percy as transmasc because it's disrespectful to Percy's character and offensive in general because Percy is a transFEM character.Within canon she was intended as a cis male,yes,but one that defies traditional manhood regularly by not being masculine in presentation,behavior or tastes and is textually a misandrist who thinks guys who ARE hypermasculine are gross creepy losers and frequently genuinely wonders what other girls see in them as a contrast to how enamored most female characters are with them for it and that's how a lot irl transfems are with dudes be they attracted to men or not but back on topic,Percy is 1.Justified in this mentality because almost every man she's met has been horrible to her(deadbeat birthdad,abusive stepdad,mostly male bullies,the first older male figure in her life she thought was good was a serial pedophile and fascist who groomed the kids she went to summer camp with into his soldiers and tons of male deities are really cruel to her and even innapropriate to an extent)and 2.Validated in it explicitly in TTC with the Zoe,Hunters of Artemis and Hercules subplot where she proves herself as being totally different from cis men and the 'exception' to how greek 'men' are rather than the rule.This applies to her human side too as she's nothing like stereotypical human boys either and this is constantly aknowledged and commented on and framed as what makes her the best hero in the franchise and most worthy of our protagonist

Percy also loves and respects women and considers them inherently better than men because they're women and says this in her narration tons of times and shows a big implied preference for either gender neutrality or strong femininity on herself too as she complains about having to present as extra male but never protests to girlyness and actually actively likes it.She shows (gender) envy to fem characters often and there's even a moment where she compares her relathionship with Nico to her acting like his mom-Not parental,she said she 'sounded like [my] mother'.There's some misc things also thrown in there that aren't solid proof but do help things come together like how sea motifs have so much femininity combined with 'The sea does not like to be restrained' and her blue obsession which is a 'boy' color but came from her mom and her being a punk with streaked hair and a love for burgers(haha)and eldest daughter and overall,Percy's so obviously wants to and should be a trans woman because it improves the story and would maker her way happier than being forced to live as a genderconforming binary man

Obviously Percy can be a femme man but that dosen't mean she can't be transfem too since i personally headcanon her as bigender with she/he/they/a hoard of neos pronouns pretty often and transmasc Percy/'positive and healthy and soft masculinity' Percy just dosen't.........do good for Percy's character and weakens it if anything because it dosen't suit her and goes DIRECTLY against who she is and turns her into something she's not i.e a normal man.Percy shouldn't have to be forced to be normal because to begin with,she's representation for neurodivergent people who're outcasts even amongst a lot of other neurodivergent people and it's just mean-spirited to us,'us' being audhd people and trans femmes both transmasc and transfeminine.Pjo fans who headcanon Percy as transmasc have a LOT of overlap with trans guys who say cruel things about femme tboys and he/him femmes regardless of specific orientation and gender and their transmisogyny i've seen so often is appalling

One time i tried to explain to a person who called TTC 'Percy Jackson and the Ra.dical Feminists' in their post that kept getting recommended to me was offensive because the Hunters are male explotation victims in-universe and in the og myths were a lesbian metaphor/slang for lesbians and Thalia's extremely tgirl-coded and even showed them the tweet by Rick where someone asked if they accept trans girls and he said yes and they tried to lecture me by saying ra.dfem has multiple meanings and that they meant 'misandrists' and tried to do a gotcha by saying i've hated on tboy Percy in the past even though I'M a tboy and they aren't and they were a fucking Apollo stan.This always happens,nobody who dosen't see transfem Percy understands the actual messages of the series or questions the bad ones or gives Percy her actual personality and story.And why is that?Because Percy IS transFEM and you need to overhaul her entierly to make her tme.Which is absolutely awful to do because she's the perfect character and the best role model neurodivergent kids could ever ask for.Transfems and trans femmes deserve Percy.Percy deserves to be herself too.Instead of what normie cyberbullies want her to be

Your ask response abt Lanque reminded me of a vaguely adjacent character hc situation. Sorry for rambling but seeing this happen and then seeing maybe one other person acknowledge it has made me feel Kind Of Insane.

so pokemon scarlet and violet (or scarvio) has a character called Penny. before the games were out her design was released and it was all we had to go of for personality, interests, etc.

there’s at least two big tweets/tumblr posts from this pre-release period where the joke around her was “oh haha this character looks like a fujoshi and has colored hair like transmascs do lol” (one said “she looks like she can draw a mean picture of two guys kissing” and i think the other said smthn like “this is a he/they if i’ve ever seen one. they know what omegaverse is”)

i’m not going to discount the multiple people who were reblogging that in good fun- however i did see a not so insignificant number of people who made it into a weirdly charged jabbing-at-tmascs thing (the colored hair, aggressive “he/they” comments, the constant references to “this might be a tmasc/nb person but they DEFINITELY fetishize gay men”)

now that we have the full story and she’s decently popular (owns full team of very popular pokemon-including trans flag colored one, socially anxious, tech enjoyer, befriends MC) it’s now pretty popular to hc her as transfem. I’ve even seen some imply that it’s a bit of a faux pas to suggest she might be tmasc (even though Nothing Is Canon.)

(Even counting pre-release period i’ve seen a minuscule amount of earnest/non-mocking tmasc penny hcs or content)

disclaimer that i like tfem hcs of penny! I just think it’s super weird that tmasc penny was only really a “thing” in the context of those jokes. i enjoy both AND i enjoy transneutral penny. i like trans hcs generally too, but i think the fandom attitude around them is toxic for anyone who wants to seriously hc a girl/woman/fem character as transmasc.

(also i’d be over the moon for Any canon trans main/major side character in pokemon but the people treating it as if you’re erasing Canon Rep with tmasc penny is… idk. Feels like settling for projection and attacking other trans people instead of focusing on. Nintendo. a massive corp which actually does deserve some real criticism re: LGBT characters and a loooooot of other things like. ruining random people’s lives over old game emulation.)

huh! that's interesting. definitely fits in with the way that transmasc identity is treated as frivolous and vaguely cringe within queer spaces. honestly, the way diversity-related headcanons are treated within fandom is weird. people seem to collectively build Canon 2 and take any disagreement as seriously as if it was erasing canon representation.

hi :3 so ik you've said farleigh probably leans into his visible queerness as a way to take control of the way in which hes othered, which leads me to a question. how dyou think his journey of realizing hes queer wouldve gone? like what wouldve been his awakening, is he fully cis, how dyou think hed describe his own queerness if asked? i wanna know your thoughts :0

HEADCANONS HEADCANONS HEADCANONS YIPEE. this post is, obviously, mostly conjecture and extrospection.

archie's audition material was a character having a phone conversation with his mother. in this phone call, the character is describing different sexual encounters with men specifically. assuming this applies to farleigh as a character (considering farleigh is queer and emerald believed this monologue piece was a good reference for an actor for farleigh), i think that queerness is a casual subject between farleigh and frederica.

HOWEVER, queerness is then boiled down to sex. when elspeth is very obnoxiously discussing queerness, she's also referring to queer sex. what we can infer from this movie is that the cattons tend to condense intimacy into sex without any genuine emotion. they have emotions and experience emotional relationships, but they're sort of shrouded in small talk, gossip, transactional dynamics, and other forms of avoidance. this is why oliver's use of genuine emotional vulnerability was so impactful with the cattons.

so, we sort of have this condensed version of queerness in which we view it as exclusively sexual. this adheres to straightness as well. when felix is talking about farleigh's sexcapades with teachers, he uses terminology that would imply these are specifically male/male dynamics. this further complicates farleigh's queerness. his attraction to men is not only perceived as strictly sexual but is also now seen as deviant. a possible parallel to this would be how the cattons see venetia's sexuality. a queer person and a woman, their inability to escape rampant sexualization.

i can see farleigh having the traditional "oh shit, i like men" realization, and all the discomfort and stress that comes with it. i also think that it would be valid to imagine that farleigh just... didn't say anything about it. like, clearly the cattons and his parents knew or found out that oh shit, he likes men. but if queerness is to be strictly a sexual or experimental endeavor, then why have any serious conversation about it at all? archie says that his parents doted on him in a way, but at the same time, they were neglectful. when he wasn't left to his own devices, he was being dragged along to dinner parties with overly mature conversation. all of this leads me to infer that maybe farleigh learned to see his own queerness as a casual affair. homophobia exists and he would've felt and heard that prejudice throughout his life, which might've resulted in an internalized feeling of... perversion?

as for gender identity, i think farleigh would have a slightly ambiguous approach. maybe nothing that people would consider trans, but definitely a less-traditional gender expression. with farleigh's mom being the only real connection he has to the world he's currently existing in, i think he might feel a need to emulate her in some way. i can picture farleigh sneaking into her room to try on her lipstick, perfumes, bath robes, high heels. you feel me? archie described frederica as someone who was probably a model in the past, who reflected the same eccentric style and glam as the rest of the cattons. i can sort of see her being like an older venetia. farleigh, as a queer person, might see femininity as both armor and a tool. in the same way that farleigh seems to treat the other ways in which he is different, i think he would amplify the showstopping "exotic" uniqueness of his queerness while hiding how it truly effects his identity.

i think farleigh's expression of his queerness is similar to everything else he does; "toeing the line," while still indulgent. his relationship with authority figures (teachers) is one of those things that seems like an unhealthy result of internalized homophobia and poor self-esteem in regard to sexuality. not to mention the power dynamic. he's in a position of lesser privilege within most english upper-class academic spaces. i'm getting off track.

i don't know what else to say since all of this is, again, conjecture. take all of this as you will, finn.

https://www.tumblr.com/crooked-wasteland/726843568652697600/how-many-times-does-a-writer-have-to-poorly-write

I feel Millie had so much potential, this would have been such an interesting take.

I think it might still be explored since Sallie May is coming back soon in season 3. Hopefully Millie’s non too because she’s a favourite of mine just for being a mom who is actually alive, and for having a personality.

But damn is it sad to see a main character not get focus until over halfway through the shows runtime. I’m sorry but more than any other character Moxxie just hogs the spotlight. And Loona gets very very little, even though Loonas episode was about her and another big female character, it was so focussed on male approval and male feelings that it was just plain ridiculous. Just like Vias episode was about male feelings. Why not have Loona and Bees rivalry be about Bee being rich and social, versus Loona growing up poor and isolated. That’s the only reason they’re so different.

Bee: “Don’t be so awkward girl! Let your guard down! Forget your worries! Being all nervous like this is just silly!”

Loona: “That’s rich, coming from someone who’s never had to put up her guard, living in a nice big house like this at the top of the food chain, where you don’t even have to work a day in your life I’d bet!”

Bee: “what’s that supposed to mean? You think I don’t have pressure! I was nice enough to let you come here to my home you little—“ but then Bee notices Loonas slightly scared face and stops herself…and there we go. This ain’t hard. Bee got mad at a compliment ffs.

I think the accusation that Millie’s mom is abusive is kindve…much? She clearly states that Millie gets too violent and carried away, seeing red, and she’s unlike Sallie who can keep her cool and hide things better. That’s not good either, but it’s not like Millie’s mom gave her different treatment for no reason. And it’s not idk “trans privilege” or whatever op was implying. (??) Isn’t that what the scene was trying to say? Millie goes too far and makes a mess? She’s very intense. And man I wish it was Millie who gave that speech at the end to get her own parents approval, not fuckin moxxie. And people are going to lose their shit if Viv doesn’t rewrite the lines about Mills being afraid moxxie will find someone better and “she should just jump”

These below, are all such facts. Viv needs to stop writing women and let another woman do it, because her own very deep misogyny is cartoonishly 1950s, it is coming through at every turn. There needs to be more non-Viv non fujoshi female presence in the writing team, grow up and stop calling this a show ‘about boys’ , it’s 2024. Since Viv has said herself that animation is a male dominated field, she should be the change she wants to see in the world.

“Women are just sadistic angry bitches and men are really delicate inside and need to be taken care of” stfu…some women are mean, some are soft, some men are tough, some men aren’t. Cmon. It’s 2024 soon.

Also:

STOP. KILLING. OR. ERASING. MOMS.

people saying wonder egg priority’s momoe is good trans rep offends me on a personal level because i STILL can’t grasp what her deal is even supposed to be. the trans boy isn’t either imo btw. he gets the most brutal backstory and his inclusion is very questionable when the whole egg thing is about girls so there’s nothing that justifies that other than the fact that he’s afab which IS blatantly transphobic. momoe’s thing is made even more confusing with all of the trans imagery (her bra literally being the flag and revealing itself when she comes to terms with herself had to have meant something) so is the egg system transphobic or not?? i feel like it only makes sense to read her as cis considering afab people are what count going by the track record, and she struggles with femininity and girls flirting with her (which is lowkey homophobic to me bc it implies sapphics will jump on any gnc girl) but this makes the trans imagery with her very weird. it’s like they associate her with specifically the trans colors several times during pivotal scenes only to throw in the trans boy counting as an egg so it's VERY muddled what they wanna go for...

being a cis woman who’s mistaken for a boy due to being gnc isn't a bad idea for a character concept, and i like the idea of her finding comfort and genuine love with a trans man who can relate to her experience. it's just SO dumb they go out of their way to code her as trans in the process of this, and not to mention the misery porn that ends up being the boy's storyline (the suffering in the show lowkey feels very fetishy especially when you look at the writers’ background i found out the main writer wrote a bunch of torture porn soap operas featuring teenage girls from this video and while i don’t think this subject matter is something that can’t ever be discussed and explored the show is so set on being miserable especially with him in particular), the aforementioned weird undertones of how girls treated momoe and the system just casually being transphobic with no real focus put on that. the system in general is miserable and fucked up and as much as i’d like to give it the benefit of doubt in that it’s the intent i don’t think the narrative thinks the gender essentalism and transphobia parts of it are actual flaws because there’s no real focus on that.

i also think the trans boy shouldn’t have been an egg character in the first place. he should’ve been a real world one. i can see the idea of a corrupt sexist and transphobic system that exploits the mental health of little girls using a trans boy for their experiments done well if it’s called out for what it is, but that’s never the case in the show at any point and it’s not something i trust these writers to tackle well. also don’t get me started on that suicide thing in episode 4 where acca and ura-acca go “women and men’s suicides mean different things; men are goal-oriented and women are emotion-oriented, and women are impulsive and easily influenced”. this misogyny and gender essentialism is, again, never called out or addressed so it’s hard to read this as anything but what the narrative and the writers believe/don’t think is an issue lol...

don’t even get me started on frill because idek what that robot girl’s point is even supposed to be. she’s even more nonsensical than momoe’s thing. the suicide disease or whatever the hell it was is the cherry on top that makes the show even more offensive because on top of condemning the girls for their suffering it feels like it’s also taking away their agency which is very dehumanizing.