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aroaceleovaldez · 19 days

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do you have any other pjo alter human hcs? 👀

Yes!

Leo being dragonkin and Jason being a wolf therian are my two main ones. Like i mentioned in that other post, I imagine Leo's is more spiritual-origin and Jason's is specifically more psychological-origin from being raised by Lupa's pack. I already went over some of the dragonkin!Leo ones in the previous post so I'll focus more on the wolf therian Jason ones here- (under a cut for length)

Because all the Romans are trained by the wolves, plus a small friendly monster population in New Rome that includes dog-headed people, Jason just. does not think twice at all about identifying so strongly as a wolf. He just presumes that's a normal thing. Everybody else just thinks he's being Very Roman so they don't question it either. It probably isn't until he goes to CHB that he realizes not everybody feels like that.

That doesn't stop him and Leo from having a conversation about feeling like a wolf/dragon respectively and continuing to presume that it's totally not an identity thing they're gonna be thinking about A Lot later on and either Everybody Just Feels Like That or they're both just got the same oddly specific unique thing going on (it's not like it'd be the only thing - they're also both Hera's champions. maybe it's just a champions of Hera thing). It's fine, they'll figure it out eventually. Piper is extremely confused about what they're going on about though.

Jason is excited a very normal amount about the concept of werewolves. He's totally not mad that he wasn't able to defeat Lycaon in battle and gain shapeshifting powers. Definitely not. He's also definitely not jealous of Frank for having shapeshifting powers, or jealous that Nico and Reyna got to fight the lycanthropes more.

Leo is also immensely jealous of Frank's shapeshifting and is heavily considering trying to bargain with the gods to swap his fire powers for that.

Jason has an encyclopedic knowledge of like every werewolf myth from different mythologies and folktales and he WILL excitedly infodump about them.

The Greco-roman werewolf myths may have not turned out for him, but the minute Jason finds out that Norse myths are on the table he's begging Annabeth if they can go visit her cousin. For science. Just to see if the Norse werewolf myths are any better. By the gods he will figure out if safely and ethically becoming a wolf is possible somehow. (He has definitely also asked Reyna to use Circe magic to turn him into a wolf before. Up to interpretation how that went down.)

Jason using claw weapons!!!!! He definitely has fought with his teeth before but he gets his hands on some nice hefty and sturdy claws and he is THRIVING with them. If he could get some sort of teeth armor/weapon to use too, he would. Unfortunately that one's a bit harder to get so his real teeth will have to do for now, when an option. (He definitely bit Krios and is 100% up for using his teeth in a fight you cannot convince me otherwise)

Speaking of biting - Jason is a biter, just in general. He affectionately chews on/nips at his friends as both an oral stim AuDHD thing and a 'kin thing. Also playfighting/sparring with them. He'd probably get into quadrobics and parkour as well if given the opportunity.

Leo's not so much into that sort of very active stuff (or very platonically affectionate stuff). He's mostly hanging out with his hoard of machinery in his den Bunker 9. They're still shiny things, they're still his hoard. He's a bit more territorial of Bunker 9 than he'd like to admit since it's his space (also combo dragonkin brain/autism stuff) but trying to explain why is way too much of a headache for him, and most people stay out of there anyways so it doesn't come up much which is fine by him.

In terms of more dragonkin-affirming activities though, despite his aversion to fire, Leo's fallen asleep in a fireplace/bed of coals/etc a couple of times in his life and he will never admit how comfortable and affirming that was for him. He does also generally feel a bit better about his fire powers if it's just the fire-resistance part, or if he's breathing fire specifically (because also it's just cool, and how can he not feel like a badass super big and strong dragon when he's literally breathing fire?) (that time in BoO he totally let loose his fire and turned into functionally a supernova of flames was also weirdly affirming for him and he doesn't know what to do with that information). He's also probably tried making arm stilts before, just to see what they're like, and if he could improve the design at all to feel and look more natural.

...Atypical pronoun sets? Atypical pronoun sets. It'd probably be awhile before they actually start using them, but I think both Leo and Jason might vibe at least a lil with he/its for otherkin/therian reasons. Leo also probably dre/drem/dris. I also think Jason would particularly vibe with wolfgender. He didn't know that was an option and once he does he really likes it. (Also have you seen the masc wolfgender flag? Look at that and tell me that's not Jason.)

Camp Jupiter probably has more alterhuman folks than CHB, just in terms of population sizes and also just given how they're trained/raised it probably comes up more over there. This does somehow simultaneously make Jason more convinced that it's just an average thing but also less aware that being otherkin/a therian is even a thing.

My friend and I have talked a lot about the absolute weirdness potential that might occur with being an alterhuman demigod. Can you imagine being some creature from mythology and then finding out not only do they actually exist in that exact moment in your world, but also they will try to hunt you down? Something something intense alterhuman linguistic debates about if you're a mythological monster does that qualify more as therian or otherkin (based on the proposed delineation of therian = real world creatures / otherkin = mythological/legendary/etc)? (second philosophical/linguistic debate happening in the background of feral/animalistic = therian / less feral/animalistic = otherkin delineation but if that monster was originally a mortal then which do they qualify as?) (third conference happening behind that one of demigods journaling their experiences as monsters who were originally mortals and how that impacts them as demigods.) The awkwardness that must exist from being like hydrakin or something and then having to fight a hydra. Or being a different kind of hydra than exists in the riordanverse (or, weirder, being hydrakin but Monster Donut hydra specifically and having to explain your odd inexplicable connection to donuts before you figure out that's a thing).

Again: Leo making 'kin gear for demigodsssss. Maybe he's the one who makes the claw weapons for Jason, who knows.

For other major characters: Annabeth would definitely be totally fascinated by daemonism and probably experiment with it at least a bit. Nico I could see vibing with voidpunk. Hazel I could also see vibing with just general label alterhuman relating to her whole being-revivied-from-the-dead situation. Maybe same for Thalia for the same reasons, or Thalia even vibing with being like dryad-hearted/kith due to the whole pine tree thing.

I got another ask about this so there will be more headcanons along these lines soon as well.

#pjo #riordanverse #leo valdez #jason grace #headcanons #headcanon #ask #Anonymous #alterhuman demigods #< screw it im making a tag for this. hooooopefully that won't interfere with community discussion tags

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mongoose-bytes · 2 months

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Another interesting label l've seen discussed in relation to damonism is alterhumanity so I'm also gonna do a poll for that as well! Once again, same rules apply, please be kind to eachother in the notes when it comes to discussion.

#daemonism #dæmonism #daemons #dæmons #alterhumanity #discussions #polls #TRYING THIS AGAIN BECAUSE TUMBLR HATES ME #if you saw me post the 24 hour version no you didn’t ⚔️

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lady-lycany · 15 days

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Just found this video on insta... I love everything about it 😭

Link to the original post: Here

#It gives me “Mark and me arguing” vibes 😭😭😂😂#Or two otherkin in a heated discussion 😂😂#werewolfkin #wolfkin #otherkin #lycanthrope #caninekin #alterhuman #nonhuman #dogkin

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talks-with-the-void · 3 months

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Werewolf Diarys part 1: When spirituality becomes toxic.

[I am very much taking suggestions for a better title instead of "werewolf Diarys btw if someone has any... also mentioning some people who showed interest in my writing, I hope you don't mind! :3 @solacesins @wolfislost @a-dragons-journal ]

Spirituality is and always was a huge part of the alterhuman community. When I, back in 2016, came in contact with this whole phenomenon for the first time, it was everywhere - kinfolk talking about past lifes, others who practised witchcraft or other magick, soulshards, godshards, parallel lifes, all of it. And while, in my perception of things, psychological otherkin are nowadays a lot more present, I would say the majority of alterhumans is still heavily spiritual.

Now, don't get me wrong - I don't think of that as a bad thing. Not in general. And I have exactly zero problems with folk believing in and practicing spirituality - I may not personally share their beliefs, but I think this is one of the areas where individual truths very much exist. Actually, my own opinion on anything is not really relevant here, I want to talk about something much more broad. A structural community-issue, I would dare to say and surprisingly something I've never seen anyone talk about.

Spirituality is a powerful tool and if used in the right way, a great source of comfort and stability for someone. That is great! I absolutely support that. A problem, however, may occur if a young person without established beliefs newly discovers their alterhumanity, joins the community and sees spiritual representation everywhere, but far far less resources for psychological alterhumanity. If you are constantly confronted with people who find happiness in a spirituality, chances are high you feel drawn towards that. Again - this is not an anti-spirituality post in disguise. You will soon understand what my point here is. So, you might start to - subconsciously or knowingly - try to fit in, to find the happiness they have. It happened to me in that exact way: I knew basically nothing about myself or my alterhumanity and I never had the chance before to explore what I might or might not belief in. Then I saw everyone talking about past lifes and simple as that, more or less decided my alterhumanity was rooted in a past life too. Because I wanted to belong. This alone would not be too much of an issue - in the normal way of things, if someone - me in this case - subconsciously or knowlingly forced themselves to belief in something they actually don't, after a few months or years they'd realize that and find their own way. Being wrong about something and trying to fit in is not inherently bad! It's a completely normal thing for (human or at least humanly socialized) brains to do.

But what happens if the person in question ends up in toxic spiritual spaces? That, too, happned to me. I had the unfortunate experience of being a deeply unstable young being with untreated BPD, depression, anxiety and various other issues who so desperately wanted to fit in. I met some people who I greatly looked up to, who followed spiritual paths - and I wanted to impress them, to be like them and most importantly not being left by them. Very very unfortunately... they had a lot of black and white thinking going on. Every little doubt about their belief was taken as a personal attack, every suggestion that something might not be a result of manifestation but maybe just a coincidence was met with anger. Don't get me wrong, if someone constantly disrespects your beliefs and tells you they're wrong, it's absolutely okay to be angry about that! But this was not the case here. I was literally afraid to say that I experienced, for example, energetic cleansing differently than they did because it would have been taken as a personal attack. But still, I wanted to fit in and was so scared of loosing the small community I built with those people that I didn't realize they were the reason I felt more and more miserable.

For those people, anything and everything was something spiritual and saying something like "oh, just yesterday I thought about song XY and today I've heard it on the radio 5 times! That's so funny, it's not even in the charts at the moment!" was instantly met with "you manifested the song!". I was talked over and told my own experiences were wrong because they didn't align with their beliefs. Lucky for me, at some point a lot of internal changes (we're a median system) happened and I/we realized what was going on and quickly cut all ties with those people. We rapidly got better and accepted that we just don't hold spiritual beliefs and that's okay. But this time did leave scars.

As a side note, aside from my personal experiences, chalking everything up to spirituality can be downright dangerous. I can lead to not checking in with the doctor because the shadow people you're seeing? Oh, it's just spirits! While I'm not saying it absolutely must be something medical, it could be hallucinations, caused by whatever. The strong headaches you get? Oh well, just caused by a blocked chakra (or, maybe not?). You might be right. It might be caused by metaphysical things, i am not telling you you're wrong. But it might as well be something health related. The circles I was in really danced on the line of being like this. Or, they crossed it, I think - several people there claimed to be able to perform physical healings over the internet. For me, they never worked.

The "structural problem" I mentioned earlier is simply how present spirituality is in this community and how that, naturally, leads to young folk blindly taking on those beliefs. That's not the fault of people who talk about their spiritual experiences and I'm not saying you should stop talking about it. Not at all! That would not be the solution.

So, what do I want to happen instead? We need to do two things: one, encourage critical thinking. And I don't mean the old-school "grilling" and having folk "prove" their identities. I mean we have to encourage folk, especially young folk, to not blindly follow beliefs they see everywhere around them but rather to look at themselves from different angles and find their own truth. If that truth ends up matching with the more common ones, great! Absolutely nothing wrong with that. But Alterhumanity and identity in general is about discovering yourself and who you are and that simply doesn't work if you try to follow someone else's individual truth. In the worst case, it might lead people into groups like the one I described above and I for one, don't want that to happen. The other thing is, the psychological side of this community needs to be more present. We need more voices speaking about psychological experiences, we need to represent ourselves more. It is so, so important for new folk in our community to be exposed to all sides of it, not just to a few.

Spirituality in itself is not bad or dangerous, but some people make it dangerous. I know that 99% of spiritual alterhumans are totally chill and cool and all of you have my deepest respect, but like it is with all things in life, toxic people also exist. And because of how prominent spirituality is in this community, i think it is our respnsibility as a community to try and protect newbies from those rare but existing toxic spaces.

I know I might step on some paws with this post and I apologize for that. But I honestly have never seen anyone talk about this issue, although I am sure I'm not the only one who experienced something like this. I'm totally open to discussion and questions, just please stay civil and respectful and grant me the benefit of the doubt - if you read this post anf thought "wow, that's such a mean thing to say", please assume it was just bad wording. English is not my native language after all.

Thank you for reading!

#I am aiming more for a discussion-inducing writing style btw not really a professional essay style #alterhuman #alterhumanity #nonhuman #otherkin #nonhumanity #psychological otherkin #spiritual otherkin #spiritual alterhuman

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whiteleopardwasteland · 1 day

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Fellow Therians

Important note(s):

Don't give up on quads even if you don't think you're good at it, these things take time. The more you do it the better you get

You do NOT need to do quads or wear gear to be a Therian

Gear can help people feel connected to their theriotype(s) but is NOT necessary

Gear can be anything from tails to a plush of your theriotype, anything that reminds you of your theriotype

Do not feel bad if other's do not understand, you understand and thats the important part :3

Stay safe guys :)

#therian #felinekin #snow leopard therian #nonhuman #seal therian #therian discussion #quadrobics #wolf therian #alterhuman #otherkin #therian quadrobics #therian positivity

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femur-bandit · 3 months

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hey are there other otherhearted (or similar) people who have a vague connection with the idea of "animals" and not a clear cut one with one (or a few) species? I feel like I'm all alone in here

#I'm only otherhearted but I'm tagging the rest because they are apart of this discussion #otherhearted #otherkin #alterhuman #therian

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xenodelic · 2 years

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On Defining Otherkin

TL;DR - Having a simple, consensus definition for the word otherkin can be helpful for explaining the identity to outsiders and newcomers. However, we reject the idea that any one person or group can authoritatively decide the definition. And we find that the stricter the definition is, the more likely you are to exclude people who would feel at home in our community.

Our inspiration for writing this is in response to recent community discussion in the past few days. Keep in mind, this is not an attack on anyone in particular, nor an attempt to "debunk" anyone or be inflammatory. This post is our opinion about how the word otherkin is defined, and why we believe that imposing strict definitions is harmful to the community. We invite open and honest discussion, either in reblogs / replies or in our DMs if you'd like to speak privately.

Post under the cut.

Here is the "consensus definition" we will be working with, and critiquing, in this post:

Otherkin: An individual who identifies, partially or wholly, as nonhuman on some non-physical level - typically mentally or spiritually. This identity is in some way innate or otherwise involuntary.

This definition is based on what we personally see used most often, and is found in several community-based dictionaries, such as this Alterhuman Dictionary. This does not mean it is "The" definition of otherkin, it is merely one we see used very commonly. Hence why we are using it as the so-called "consensus" definition.

If someone who has never heard of otherkin asked for an explanation, we believe this is a perfectly acceptable starting place. It accurately summarizes quite a large majority of the community, and is a good basis to build off of for further discussion.

So what are our issues with it? We'll go point by point.

1.) Defining otherkin as a non-physical identity. This portion of the definition is technically accurate in the sense that the vast majority of the community do not consider themselves to be physically nonhuman. Otherkin experiences most often exist on a psychological or spiritual level. It would absolutely be inaccurate to say that otherkin IS a physical identity.

However, strictly excluding those who experience their nonhumanity on a physical level leaves out large swaths of the community. While its not quite as common anymore, there has historically been members of the community who considered themselves to be genetically nonhuman. This can include changelings, those who believe that their ancestors had children with nonhuman beings, those who believe their DNA has been altered in some way, and many more. We ourselves believe that we have lycanthropic DNA tracing back to distant ancestors.

There are also those who simply consider their body to be a nonhuman body. "I am nonhuman, and this is my body, therefore it is a nonhuman's body." This is not necessarily a denial of one's physiology, simply a statement of one's self determination about the nature of their body.

More information about those who are physically nonhuman.

This definition also excludes people with Clinical Lycanthropy as well as some Endels. Not all CLs and Endels consider themselves to be otherkin, but many do!

The point we are trying to make is that while otherkin is generally a non-physical identity - experiencing your nonhumanity on a physical level does not and should not exclude you from being otherkin.

2.) Defining otherkin as involuntary. Same logic applies here as with the previous point. Otherkin identities are generally involuntary, and the vast majority did not choose to otherkin. It would be inaccurate to say that otherkin is a choice for most people.

However, identity alteration is absolutely an option for some people. Many people have fluid identities, and some choose to move towards a different experience of the self.

Believe me, I know this is a sensitive topic, especially for those who have experienced the trauma of others trying to forcibly change something about them. Just because some people out there voluntarily alter their identity, that DOES NOT mean you chose yours, or that you can or should change yourself in anyway.

All it means is that people are not static. Not everybody was "born this way" and that's ok! And just like people should respect that one person's identity is innate, we should also respect that for others it might not be.

There has been much written about otherlinkers and copinglinkers who began with a voluntary identity that eventually became involuntary over time. Many linkers consider their linktype to have become a kintype. Some people gained a nonhuman identity through magical rituals. Others had an identity alteration after trauma, or some other life-changing event. Some system members gain a nonhuman identity after voluntarily fusing with another system member. There has always been multiple theories to how people can be otherkin, and several of them include some level of intentional connection.

Hell, even tracing community history back to its very beginnings, the Silver Elves believed that wanting to be an Elf was enough for you to be one!

So in general, a kintype is very rarely a choice, but there are some people who gained it through voluntary means, whether directly or indirectly. That does not make their identity any less genuine than an involuntary one, and it certainly does not exclude them from being otherkin.

On page 66-67 of Orion Scriber's Directory, you can find several writings about becoming nonhuman, as well as those who are no longer nonhuman.

We also strongly recommend reading aestherian's essay on the history of voluntary identities in the community.

3.) Defining otherkin as strictly nonhuman. This is a tricky one to explain. Again, otherkin has always been defined as a nonhuman identity, so it's perfectly accurate to explain it that way. However, we do think there is room for exceptions.

One possible exception to the rule being human fictionkin. Many human fictionkin consider themselves separate from otherkin, which is totally fine. However, some consider their experiences to be very similar to otherkin. Especially if their human fictotype has traits that are not standard to this world's humans - such as superpowers, magic, or physical traits such as being born with purple or pink eyes. These deviations may cause a fictionkin to relate more to nonhumans, despite technically being human by the standards of their source.

Some nonhuman system members do not consider their nonhuman identity to be a kintype, instead they may be an extranth or something else entirely. However, nonhuman system members can have human fictotypes - thus the "other" in "otherkin" would actually be the human identity, rather than the nonhuman identity.

There are lesser known groups who identify as no-longer extant human ancestors and other hominids, such as Homo Erectus and Neanderthals. These definitely blur the line between human and not, but we would argue that they are certainly "other"!

And yes, we do think someone with a fact-type (factkin, etc) could consider themselves otherkin if they feel their experiences align. We know this subject is touchy, and we don't have time to get into in-depth, but the point is about whether or not the individual feels that their experiences align with others in the community.

We think its perfectly acceptable to define otherkin as being a nonhuman identity, but there should be room for others who fall in unusual categories or relate to nonhumans in general.

Again, this is on a case-by-case basis and is up to the individual to define whether they feel they fall under the otherkin umbrella. If one relates to otherkin experiences or feels at home in the community, one should have the right to self determine themselves as such. Even if they "don't fit" the standard definition.

4.) "Otherkin isn't a mental illness / delusion". Ok, so, this is a brief interlude to critiquing the definition above. This is more in response to the general talking point that comes up time and time again.

This talking point is largely in reaction to anti-kin rhetoric. Anti-kin often bash otherkin in ableist ways, such as saying that identifying as nonhuman must be a mental illness. It makes perfect sense to respond, "no, it isn't" especially if you yourself have kintypes that aren't related to mental illness.

However, there's a few problems with this response. When anti-kin say "otherkin is a mental illness", it is with the unspoken implication that something rooted in mental illness means that it isn't real, that it is wrong in some way, and that it should be fixed or cured. By responding "but its not a mental illness!" one is often, without realizing it, contributing to that same stigma.

It is far more accurate to say "otherkin isn't inherently a mental illness". Which is true, however, it would be very helpful to follow it up with something like, "And even if that's the case, which it is for some, that would not make it any less valid or genuine."

Mentally ill and delusional people still have the right to self determination. A kintype rooted in mental illness is not any less genuine than kintypes of other origins. By excluding otherkin with these sorts of origins, you are implicitly contributing to ableist and sanist stigma that mentally ill people do not have the same level of autonomy to decide their identity.

Like it or not, many nonhuman identities come from trauma, delusions, neurodivergence, and more. If that does not apply to you, that's perfectly fine! There is nothing wrong with stating that your kintype is not rooted in mental illness, and that many otherkin are similar. But when doing so, you do not have to throw mentally ill nonhumans under the bus.

5.) Who gets to decide what is and isn't otherkin? Well, we could start back at the very beginning, when the term was coined. The word "otherkind" was coined to be a more broad and inclusive alternative to Elvenkind. However, this was over 30 years ago, and a hell of a lot has changed since then.

Therian, otherkin, and other nonhuman communities used to be almost entirely separate, with hundreds of scattered, isolated forums and chatrooms all across the internet. Now most of us are consolidated to the major social media sites, and intermingling more than ever.

Otherkin and all the intersecting communities have exploded outwards into all sorts of directions. However, even when the communities were a lot smaller and more isolated - there never was, and never could be, a leader of otherkin. There are well known figureheads and respected greymuzzles - but no leaders, no rulers, no gods, no masters.

No one single person, or group of people gets to define what otherkin is. There is no gatekeeper, there is no arbiter of the otherkin experience. I don't care how long they've been in the community, or how many followers they have, or how well respected they are. Nobody is the authority. The best we can hope for is to come to a very loose consensus, and to always leave room for nuance.

And trust me, we get it. The harm that "kin for fun" (or kin-as-relating) has done to our community have made many want to be cautious. Having a solid, clean definition of otherkin would give us something nice and easy to point to and say "They aren't real otherkin!". However, its really not that simple.

KFF / KAR aren't harmful solely because they're using the "wrong definition" - they're harmful because they push ableist and sanist rhetoric. They're harmful because they push the idea that anyone who is genuinely nonhuman MUST be delusional while also excluding and making fun of actual delusional nonhumans. They're harmful because they shit on people's spiritual beliefs and punish "problematic" kintypes. They're harmful because they refuse to understand the way that their rhetoric has damaged our communities.

And unfortunately, we do not have a solution to that problem. But what we can tell you is that creating a stricter definition of otherkin and attempting to harshly gatekeep our community is NOT going to fix anything. There have been countless testimonies from kin who have been harmed, abused, or had their self-discovery set back by years because of community gatekeeping. Attempting to draw clear lines in the sand is only going to push out newbies, questioning otherkin, and those with more complex relationships to their sense of self.

There is never going to be a definition of otherkin that perfectly includes all kin and perfectly excludes all non-kin.

People are just too complex to be sorted into neat little boxes that way. There will always be grey areas, nuances, and blurred lines. There will always be individuals who do not want to be sorted, and never could be. There will always be those who don't quite fit in, but still choose to make their home with us.

And we should be the first to welcome them.

6.) So how do we define otherkin? Well, like we said, we can never come up with a perfect definition of the word. And we certainly do not have the authority to do so. But we have some suggestions that may help create a more inclusive consensus definition for newcomers and outsiders.

Let's start with the definition from above, and modify it a bit.

Otherkin: An individual who identifies, partially or wholly, as something nonhuman - typically on a mental or spiritual level. May also include individuals who identify as non-standard deviations of humanity, such as fictional humans.

Is this perfect? No, definitely not. Admittedly its a bit clunky. But the purpose is to include wiggle room for exceptions, such as the word "typically" and "may also include". The purpose of this definition is not to exclude those who aren't otherkin, but to include those who may be otherkin.

We once again want to reiterate that nobody has to use this version (in fact, we welcome anyone to pitch in and critique it). The definition from the start of this post is perfectly workable, so long as one clarifies that it is a general explanation, and may not include all the nuances of otherkinity.

Our major goal here is to ensure that whatever definition we use, that we do not do so with the intention to exclude - but rather to explain, invite curiosity, and to welcome kin from all experiences into our community.

#otherkin #otherkind #nonhuman #alterhuman #terms #terminology #discussion #long post #lol the length of this post got super out of hand but we hope its still readable #oh well just gonna toss this post out into the wind #my writing #our writing

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puddin-dear · 3 months

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Daily reminder that its okay to not hate your therianthropy.

I’ve seen critters feel ashamed to enjoy their alterhumanity and therianthropy, because of some spreading how much a struggle it is to be alterhuman (valid). Like don’t get me wrong, vent abt it mates, but some take this vent to another lvl by hating on those who find their identity enjoyable.

I may be nonsensically rambling as I am hella tired rn, but my point still stands. You can love your therianthropy, NEVER feel ashamed to be proud of who you are

(also gn critters, ly /p <3)

#therian #alterhuman #otherkin #therians #therianthropy #alterhumanity #alterhumans #alterkins #alterkin #cat therian #tapi discussions

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onlyhalfdemon · 2 years

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on being kin: why go that far?

it’s funny to me when people write off the otherkin/therian experience by saying we’re immature or just going through a phase or we just want to feel like we’re beautiful and special and like our existences matter because like

if we just wanted to feel special or cool or scary or whatever, we would all be unicorns and cats and wolves and maybe some vampires and dragons. you’re out there, of course. and your identities are valid. i love you. i see you. you’re not making this up. that’s not the point i’m making.

i’m just posing the question: if that’s all this is, why go that far?

when a human being identifies as an angelic being made of eyes and wheels and fire with a voice that rattles the heavens

or when an individual feels more like a Venus fly trap caught in human flesh than a human being

you really CAN’T just make blanket statements. you don’t need to identify as some kind of eldritch being in order to attain that kind of validation or escape reality or relieve boredom or love yourself or what have you. again: why go that far? some of us have kintypes so far removed from the human experience that even the harshest skeptic couldn’t dismiss as nothing. our loved ones reject us. we put up a wall. we’re all alone until we get on our laptops and log onto Tumblr. this is something.

yeah, maybe we’re wrong and it’s not real or whatever. i disagree, but again. not the point. point is: even if we’re wrong, there is still something going on that you can’t just roll your eyes at. what makes a human being identify as a shapeshifter from the void or a monster with nine heads or a deranged comic book villain or a videogame hero most don’t take seriously? and on and on and so on and so forth.

in conclusion: this is a psychological phenomenon, and if you’re not taking it seriously, you’re not paying attention.

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knifedog-machina · 2 months

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Role Fatigue And Being A Shell Of A Person

I Want Off This Self-Inflicted Archetype Ride, Thanks

Hey, my name's Gavin, he/him, and I'm writing out my fucking identity crisis on main, because what else do we have a journal for? Feel free to reblog, maybe someone can relate to this.

Content Warning: I get existentially fucked up about my personhood and purpose in life, and I use a few reclaimed slurs as identity labels for myself. This ends on a pretty hopeful note, all things considered.

So. This past week, we realized something, that Jude and I - especially me - have been basically fitting in the same roles Max's daemons used to. Because brains are weird, and they love patterns, and we've been unconsciously keeping this pattern going for a solid year or so.

And at the end of that last essay he posted about it, Max said that we aren’t the same thing. His daemons were parts of himself and extensions of what he needed back then. We, as their headmates, are separate people. And that’s that, right? Pack it in, solid conclusion, all neat and tidy. I sure fucking wish it were, but no, I’m having a bad time and I'm going to talk about it. My old therapist told me that writing out my thoughts is good for me, and I’m choosing to believe her.

I spent most of my time in the back. Not in a proper headspace, but just running damage control, executive functioning. Keeping track of stuff like, when's the last time you ate, or what do we need to do now to make your feelings less awful, or you should really take a break from memorizing brainstem structure and take a walk. And it's kinda ridiculous that I can do it for someone else, because I also have ADHD and all the executive function issues that go with it, but it’s easier when it's for someone else. And I guess that's part of being a Caregiver.

I'm capitalizing Caregiver there because I'm talking about the archetype. Martin was a caregiver archetype - her purpose in life was to take care of Max and their needs as a person, and she felt fulfilled and content with this because she was a part of them. She was never under the impression that she had anything to gain from becoming a fully separate person, someone with her own wants and needs as separate from her job, and she didn’t have anything to gain! She was happy like that, being an extension of someone else's needs, because Max was living enough life for both of them, and she didn't need to be a person for them to exist and thrive together.

I’m a separate person from Max. I'm a separate person from Jude. I'm not just an extension of what my partners need from me. But - fuck me, I've spent this long trying to be! And it's not even something that started here, it started in source, because Jude needed me to be functional while they were fucked up and having meltdowns over their abuser, and I stepped up because I wanted to help them. I helped them until I couldn’t anymore, because I was emotionally exhausted, and I stopped and recovered just enough that I could help them again the next time they ran back to me.

And I didn’t learn anything from that! I didn’t learn that I had to take time to rest and recover before I could help anyone else, I learned that I'm fully fucking capable of helping someone else if I just focus on them. This is the exact opposite of what I was supposed to learn, but I'm nothing if not exceptional.

Because - listen, I like helping people, I genuinely like taking care of people I love, it feels like I'm doing something important and making a difference and I am. It's so important to me to make sure that my loved ones are okay, and if they aren’t, I want to help them feel better. It's genuinely fulfilling to me.

And I looked at that, and I looked at what I could do, now that I'm here, feeling lost and confused and upset about forgetting important people and details in my life, and I decided that I would be fine just doing that. Only that. Specifically that. I can forget about how I feel like I’ve lost my identity by just making a new one. Right? It’s not like I had anything else to do, and I like helping people. It worked out.

So I just helped out. I didn't front, even though Jude did to talk to friends and make new ones and gradually get more involved in our daily lives, because I just didn't fucking want to. Like, really, what did I have to talk about with people? I don't have much. I'm doing something important, anyway, isn't that more useful than talking to people, or playing a game, or getting into a podcast, or reading a book? I was completely fine, and I had to be fine, because I couldn't help my partners if I wasn't fine and if I couldn’t do anything useful I’d have to face how fucking disconnected I felt from being a living person.

And now. Now, I can’t do that anymore. Because I fucking burned out. You really could have seen it coming months ago, if you paid attention, but I sure fucking didn’t. So I can’t do the things that I’ve been building my fragile fucking self-image over, and I’m left to look at what else I have to my identity to talk about. And it's really not enough, honestly.

Like, okay, I have three cats. They're wonderful little bastards, and I love them, and I can't hold a conversation only talking about my cats. I'm a fag, I’m queer, I’m transsexual, I'm kinky, I'm stone, and several of our friends have boundaries around discussing sexuality and slurs that I am not going to cross. I was into martial arts back in source, and we don't have the time or money to learn that now. I tend to like alternative rock and indie music, and I haven't listened to new music in months so that's kind of a dead end. I like tabletop roleplaying games, and we don't have the time to listen through a whole session, let alone a season, and I don't have opinions to discuss on them anyway because I'm fucking tired.

So I don't have much that makes me feel like I have an identity. I feel lost and frustrated and tired and anxious and useless. And I argued with my partners about reaching out to our friends for support, because I don't want to burden them with my nervous breakdown. Because isolating myself from the world has gone so well so far, hasn't it?

Turns out it helps to talk to people. Turns out we have the kinds of friends who also like helping their loved ones. Shocker, I know. And we know the guy who wrote the guide to growing as a person from being a fictive - thanks Goratrix - so I really should've done that weeks ago. Preferably before the nervous breakdown, but whatever, it happened.

In conclusion, I'm really not okay right now. Huge fucking surprise. But at least I know I’ll feel better if I start actively doing things. Because I can do that. Listen to new songs, listen to one session over three days. Play a video game. Getting one fucking hobby will probably do wonders to fight off the existential despair. And it's all going to be painfully fucking slow, because I'm not gonna remake a sense of self in a week, and it's going to suck. And I'm gonna get through it, and I'm going to feel better. It'll be worth it.

And hey, if you read through this whole thing and you're also going through the horrors, mood, take my hand. We’ll get through this shit together.

#gavin talks #personal essay #archetrope #plurality #fictive #alterhuman #daemonism #well. related to daemonism discussion on this blog

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