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cartierdreamx · 11 months

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𝕯𝖊𝖘𝖙𝖎𝖓𝖊𝖉 𝕿𝖔 𝕱𝖆𝖑𝖑 *3*

Hi my honey buns <333, I am so sorry for the wait, but here it is and I so hope you enjoy!! Just diving in further into Jenna’s character and r has a secret?????!!!, I am like half asleep right now so I have no idea what to say butt I will also mention, I will look over this ch properly with a full rested mind once I wake up LMFAO. I hope you enjoy and if you do, please consider reblogging, following, and commenting! Thank you all for your constant love and support! J <33

If you would like to be apart of a taglist so you know when the next chapter comes out, comment down below or let me know thru asks!! Also please make sure your tags are on, so I’m able to tag you🤎

Pairings: jenna ortega x fem! Reader

Warnings: the tiniest bit of angst, dark themes, swearing, mentions of weapons and violence and murder.

This fic is STRICTLY 18+, as it involves adult themes, minors DNI, you are responsible for your own social media intake, which includes reading entertainment which this fic falls under, so one last warning- this fic is 18+. Thank you!

*though my fics have real people, my fics are just for entertainment and far from reality*

FYI: JENNA IS G!P IN THIS FIC!!

There was barely any times Jenna felt abandoned, hopeless, trapped, and there were even less times where Jenna felt this way about a woman, an ordinary citizen. Vulnerable was never a side she would welcome, it made her feel weak, an easy access for Gio, so when you came along, you were an anomaly, you were only supposed to be a one-night stand, she would never admit it but the heat of her heart upon talking to you melted the layer of ice she projects.

Oh, how she wishes she had never spoken to you, you would’ve been safe, if everything she cares for would be destroyed, if she had never spoken to you, crimson would have never painted her hands, your crimson, your blood spilt was a reminder this was all her fault.

But, would there have been more regret if she left you alone that night? There was barely any times Jenna felt vulnerable, but when she’s with you, that’s what she is, and tonight, she was more vulnerable than ever. Vulnerability wasn’t welcomed, but it encased every inch of her.

“Jen, you have to let go of her.” Viv sighs, placing a hand on her shoulder.

Jenna winces away, “NO, no, I can’t, I can’t, please, Viv.”

“Hun, I know you don’t want to, but we have to get her on this stretcher so Kaman can take of her.”

“I WAS SUPPOSED TO TAKE CARE OF HER.” Now in a softer tone and as her tears fall, she repeats, “I was supposed to take care of her.”

Viv understood her feelings, she didn’t want to lose you either, and at the possibility of losing you, she couldn’t lose Jenna the same night, “Jenna, this isn’t your fault, you have to get that through your head.”

How she would give up anything in the world right now to see your seraphic smile again, she’d trade her throne, she’d take off her mafia crown and let the city fall into the hands of Gio Marcello if it meant your hands could caress her face once more. The weakened brunette, always so contumacious, never giving in, but she knew she had to, just this once, although, she was a great negotiator.

“Can I at least hold her in the stretcher?” There was always a fierceness in her eyes, Viv and Bruce knew that look all too well, but seeing her like this was different, the same knots in their backs that Jenna’s stubbornness caused were untied by her weakness, well in Jenna’s eyes, her weakness, but in reality, it was proof she’s just like any other citizen on the street, hurt and scared, in this moment, she wasn’t the most feared woman, wasn’t the crown heir to the Ortega family, she wasn’t a playboy, she wasn’t egotistical, she wasn’t arrogant, she was just Jenna.

“Oh, baby, I don’t thin-.”

“Of-course, you can Jenna, I just need to to be careful and still so I can take her vitals administer an IV.” Kaman, the head doctor of the towers, cuts in.

“I promise.”

As the two of you are whisked away into a nearby elevator, Viv and Bruce stay back, as much as they wanted to accompany their friends, they knew they had a job to do, they couldn’t let the family fall, not when Jenna needs them most, and so with unspoken words, the two of them knew exactly what to do. Bruce manning a team of soldiers, investigating what happened and who caused this mess, and Viv staying remote collecting intel from Bruce whilst trying to hold the integrity of the tower when their leader has fallen. Temporarily of course, hopefully.

Ignorance is bliss is the saying, and Bruce so wanted to bathe in this bliss, the bliss where he doesn’t find out what happened to you, his demeanour paints itself as large rottweiler, physically, his brute strength would scare any normal human being away but, on the inside, he had a heart as strong as the winds on top of mountains.

For you, his heart welcomed you in, he won’t ever admit it to Jenna, only because she’d deny it, but when he senses Jenna truly cares for someone, his love and care automatically calls out for that same person. His overprotectiveness over you blames himself slightly for what happened, but not as much as Jenna did.

“Bruce, we found y/n’s blood and smashed up cameras from across the street and corners, I’m sorry.”

“Don’t apologise.” His flat tone masking the fact he’s trying his best to hold everything. “Were you guys able to find anything else?”

“Right, and unfortunately not.”

Bruce sighs deeply with remorse, “shit, wait okay, okay, get the smashed cameras to Ammo in tech, she’s savvy with these things, it’s slim, but we have to try.”

One of his soldiers’ nods and the rest start collecting fragments of evidence alongside the actual cameras. “Hey Viv, we might have something, meet me on Ammo’s floor, she might be able to resurrect the SD card from the cameras.”

As much as she wanted to stay, the force of her wanted to leave, Jenna held you for so long, but she got so lost in the pain, she forgot the copious amount of regret and guilt she’d feel when you woke up and saw her face, you told her you hate her, but did you mean it? Either way, she wanted nothing to do with these feelings, you’re better off waking up next to someone you love.

“Jenna?” Kaman, looks up from you after doing her regular check, “where are you going, sweetie, doctor intuition tells me she’ll be waking up soon.”

“Out.” Her body was shutting her heart down, her brain is in control now and maybe it should’ve stayed in control, not passing on the torch to her heart, a lot of regret wouldn’t have existed if that were the case. Jenna grits her teeth and lets out a breath through the minuscule gaps between, “I’m calling Solana, her best friend, she deserves to know what happened, and she,” now pointing at you with her forehead, eyebrows “she deserves someone else here.”

“You’re running away again, Jenna.”

“What else am I supposed to do?” Jenna bites back.

“Stay.”

“That’s not an option.” Jenna, now using a tone you’d only hear from a mother. Before Kaman could say anything else, the space between you and her had been closed off, and that wasn’t the only thing restrictive.

There was something about the night ambiance that always provided fresh air, each molecule of oxygen that raced through her body was pure, antonymous with the blood spilt over the years as a result of her hands.

Hello? Who is this?

Hi Solana, sorry for the late-night call but something happened, oh, it’s Jenna by the way.

Though it was over the phone, Jenna could feel Sol’s heart drop.

OH! Jenna, hi, Sol is fine by the way, is y/n okay? I’ve been trying to reach her, but I can’t seem to get a hold of her.

There was an accident… Can you come to the towers?

Fuck, okay, I’m on my way.

Once Sol walks into, Jenna is greeted with a heavy heart, yet a kind smile. “Is she okay?”

“She will be, she’s going to wake up soon, she’ll want you there, just head up to the floor marked with H.”

“Aren’t you coming with?”

At this very moment, something clouded the air, you couldn’t see it, feel it nor smell it but something in the air that made Jenna retain why she’s not going up with Sol, “she needs you, not me and plus, I have to do something.” That last line was a ramble, she didn’t have to do anything, not at this very moment, but she couldn’t go see you. Couldn’t or won’t?

Sol sighs and takes a step towards Jenna, “okay,” the mafia queen had never been easy to read, no one knew what went on inside of her, but tonight, Sol read her like a novel, but she didn’t want to push. “You know,” caressing Jenna’s hand “whatever happened, it wasn’t your fault, Jenna, no one blames you.” Jenna didn’t have the courage to look at Sol in the eyes, all she could muster up was “y/n does.”

“I’ve known her for years, I share a soul with her, pun intended,” trying to make Jenna smile, but Sol is sure that joke flew over her head, “she doesn’t blame you.” Sol’s last attempt to console Jenna and try to convince her to come up but stubborn is Jenna’s middle name, so all she could give Sol was a headshake and a smile as the elevator doors close.

Maybe I should go to her. A constant thought that flooded Jenna’s mind but in the split second where she was about to press the button marked ‘H’ on the elevator, a text from Viv telling her to meet them on the tech floor came through, directing her finger towards the button marked ‘T’ instead.

Walking into the office, Jenna’s fist immediately clenches up at the sight of smashed up cameras with intricate wires tangled up within each other. “For the sake of everyone in the city, PLEASE tell me you’ve found something,” there was desperation in her tone, she wanted to throw the closest object across the room but the breath she takes seems to calm her down enough to hear her little posse out.

Like Alvin and the Chipmunks, Bruce, Viv, and Ammo avert their gaze from the screen to Jenna, “this right here is why you pay me six figures.” Ammo retorts, making Jenna giggle a bit, the first time a positive sound escaped her mouth since finding out you were hurt.

“Alright, no need to boast, especially when I make 10.” Jenna smirks and Ammo rolls her eyes.

“How’s y/n?” Viv says with concern.

“Ah, she’s great?” There was some hesitation when she answered, truthfully, she doesn’t know how you are, when she left you, you were stable, but she doesn’t know how you are. “I’m not really sure, Sol is up with her, and I got a text from Kaman that she woke up when I was on the way up.”

“And you’re not there?” Viv exclaims with such flash.

“She won’t want me there.”

Viv inflates her cheeks to the brim with air before letting out a huff, “Ammo, will you please pass me the magazine on your desk.” As no words were exchanged, Viv starts to roll up the paper and trains her eyes at Jenna, no one knew what was going to happen next.

“BAD, JENNA, BAD.” Viv screams as she knocks Jenna on the head with the magazine, at the same time, Jenna extends her arms above her head, flinching away at every hit as a way to protect herself.

“VIV?” Jenna squeals, “what was that for?” she then questions whilst Bruce and Ammo try so hard not to laugh as tears form in their eyes.

“That’s for being here, waltzing around like an idiot when you should be waltzing around like an idiot up there,” Viv pointer finger erects up, “you know, with y/n?”

“I just- she doesn’t, she hates? Aw for fucks sake, just show the video, stop lingering on me.” Jenna commands, not wanting to talk about her feelings, and definitely not wanting to talk about her feelings for you. What feelings? Does she even have feelings for you?

“Are you sure? It’s a bit, well you know.” Viv informs.

“How much blood have I washed from my hands?” Jenna bites back.

“Yeah, but you didn’t have feelings for said blood.” Viv points out, making Bruce and Ammo scoff out a laugh.

“What? I don’t have feelings for y/n!” Jenna starts getting all defensive and in unison just like the chipmunks, the group of three goes “mhmhm.”

“Ugh, whatever, just play the video.” As the video plays, Jenna watches what that night was like for you, in clear technicolour, how the man had followed you like a predator set on his prey. And as his palm lands on your face, she squirms, she doesn’t want to go on, she doesn’t want to see you like this. No amount of violence she had witnessed and caused could ever prepare her for what she was watching.

JENNA! JENNA! PLEASE, JENNA, PLEASE, JUST STOP!

The colour drained from Jenna’s face as quickly as the rage set in, once she heard the first syllable of her name, she knew you were calling out to her and it was all too much for her, there was water setting on her tongue, if she saw anymore, she was sure she’d throw up everywhere. Jenna rushes out the office, accidentally slamming the glass door behind her, drawing the attention of the other tech workers to her, but their gazes quickly returned to their screens as they realise who they were staring at.

“Jenna, are you okay?” Viv asks as she closes the door behind her, Jenna couldn’t hold eye contact with her, too scared that tears would start streaming down her face if she had seen the softness of Viv’s face; concerned for her dear friend.

“I’m fine.” The words just barely making it through her teeth.

“You’re not, and that’s okay, I just need you to tell me what’s going on through your head, this entire tower is your family, we can help.”

“She-” Jenna croaks, “she called for me, Vivica.” Using her full name, this indicated she was an even bigger mess than anyone anticipated, Jenna would use ‘Vivica’ when things got too serious, too overwhelming, and those times barely existed, Viv greeting her name like a stranger. “She called for me and I wasn’t there, I couldn’t save her.”

Placing a firm grip on both her shoulders, Viv comforts Jenna, “Jenna, look at me, there was nothing you could do in that moment to help her, get that through your thick skull.” Jenna huffs out a deep sigh, “but.” “No buts, stop blaming yourself, and you did save her, she’s alive because you took her in.” Viv reassures.

“Okay.” Jenna didn’t want to ‘okay’ this conversation, especially when she herself wasn’t okay. But that was all she could muster up at this moment.

“Okay. Now tell me what you need.”

“I need to find that man and kill him.” An ‘o’ shape forms Viv’s mouth, but she doesn’t know why she’s surprised, this was the most logical solution for Jenna. “No, not kill, that’d be giving him mercy, I want to hurt him so bad he wishes he was never born.” There was such fury in Jenna’s eyes, a fury no one had ever seen, not even Viv, but she understood, she shared that same fury, it was the same with Bruce, but Jenna held most of the fire, she conjured it.

“Okay, okay, that’s on brand, but before you go out and hunt him down and we feed you information, you should know, this wasn’t a random attack, the van that ended up picking him and her up, ultimately dropping her off at our feet was Marcello.”

“Gio did this?” The fire only growing stronger at the realisation that Gio was using you as a manipulation tactic to see her fall, to make her weak, vulnerable.

“Unfortunately, so he may be guarded.”

“He won’t, he’s a useless pawn to Gio, and I’m assuming he wasn’t supposed to hurt her that bad.”

As Jenna heads down to the garage, everyone at their stations waiting to give Jenna information on Jameson’s whereabouts, Jenna ends up running into a frantic Sol. “Sol? Are you okay?”

“Jenna! Just the girl I was looking for, y/n’s awake, she’s doing great and she’s looking for you.” Jenna wishes she had never run into Sol, the guilt she buried about how she wasn’t there when you woke up was slowly making its way back up to the surface and that same feeling of saliva settling on her tongue was back again.

“I’m glad she’s doing better.”

“You’re not coming to see her?”

Before Jenna could answer, adding onto the guilt that harbours her, Sol had once more read Jenna and the twitch in her eyes, the pursed lips and the disconnected eye contact told her all she needed to know. “I wish you believed that this isn’t your fault.”

“Me too,” Jenna smiles at her, “later, when she’s well enough, I want her to recover in my penthouse, I’ll have people set up the guest bedroom, it’ll give me peace of mind that she’s here with m-, with uh, you know protection.”

Sol tries to hide her smirk at Jenna’s slight mistake where she was supposed to say ‘me,’ where she wanted to say ‘me,’ “that’s very sweet of you, it’ll give me some peace of mind too.”

“If you want, I can have another room set up for you?” Jenna kindly offers.

“OH, no, that’s very sweet, but I don’t want to intrude, and plus I have a business to run and I’m not in any danger, thank you though.”

“Of-course, just let me know if you change your mind, and the only thing that poses a danger to you is TMZ stealing your work.” Jenna winks, making Sol laugh, before heading towards her personal garage, separate the the tower’s garage.

Which car today? She thinks to herself, “take the GT3, perfect for a 1am cruise, we can see you wallowing in indecisiveness, this is a problem only you’d have by the way.” Viv speaks, coming from Jenna’s ear piece.

“Heh, you’re right the irish green GT3 is perfect for a 1am cruise, though this won’t be a cruise, more like sweet, sweet revenge.”

“Yuck, never say that again, this isn’t a movie.”

“Hmm, kinda is, but maybe more like a book.”

As you wait for Sol to get back from her little quest, you can’t help but wonder if it’ll just be Sol walking through the doors or will Jenna accompany her. Despite being beaten to a pulp, you remembered everything, you’ve always had a stellar memory and despite all the hurt and pain, there was something about the warmth Jenna encased you in whilst in your arms that washed away the pain, each beat of your heart was in sync with hers and for once she wasn’t the most feared woman in America, she was Jenna.

Just Jenna, with the ability to be vulnerable like everybody else. As much as you didn’t want to admit it, waking up to the lack of her warmth ached you, but that doesn’t mean you weren’t grateful and relieved to see Sol by your side, but deep down your heart longed to be in sync with hers again.

“Hi, my sweet one.”

“Sol!” And only Sol walked through the doors, leaving you deflated, not realising you displayed your disappointment for Sol to see.

“I know, I’m sorry.”

“No, don’t apologise, it’s okay, I just thought, never mind, it’s stupid.”

“It really isn’t y/n.” Sol takes a seat by your leg on your bed.

“I just want to thank her.”

“She knows you’re thankful, what you really want is her, or do you still hate her?” Sol teases.

You hmph, “I don’t want her.” Is that a lie, y/n? “And I don’t necessarily hate her.”

“Hm, okay, whatever makes you sleep at night, however, if you don’t hate her, why’d you tell her otherwise?”

“You heard about that?”

“Whole tower at this point.”

“I feel like this is karma for being a journalist,” you two share a laugh, taking a deep breath, you confess, “when I ran into her at the mall, she had told me to tell her that I hate her, if I told her that, she would leave me alone, when I told her I hate her, I didn’t mean it in a spiteful way, I meant it in a I don’t want to be a burden to you way, because I knew she would stop at nothing to hurt whoever did this to me, I couldn’t let her get hurt on behalf of me, get hurt in general.”

Viv and Bruce heard all of that through the door so when they walk in, Viv couldn’t help but make a remark, “aw, you do care about her.”

Your face lights up at the sight of your friends, “unfortunately,” you joke.

“How’re ya doing kid?” Bruce speaks first, which surprises everyone in the room.

“I’m doing better, you?”

“I’m not the one who got hurt.”

“Not physically.” Your statement makes Bruce bow his head down a bit, confirming your words to be true.

“I’ll be okay.” He smiles.

“Viv?”

“I’ll be okay too, I’m just glad you’re doing better.” She walks up to you and gives you a tight squeeze.

“OH!” You remember that there was a high possibility Sol and the other two have never met before, “this is Sol, my everything.” Sol smiles and holds your hand.

“Yes, hi, hello, it’s a pleasure to meet you.” Viv sticks out her hand and Sol gracefully accepts.

“Please, pleasure’s all mine, thank you for taking care of her.” Sol giggles at her, “and nice to meet you too, uh?” She turns to Bruce.

Bruce tips his head at her like a mini curtsy, a gentleman he is, “Bruce, ma’am.” Another smile from Sol.

“I don’t mean to interrupt introductions here, but is Jenna around?” You gather up the courage to ask.

“She’s on her way back to the towers.” Viv answers.

“From where?”

“I’ll leave that to her to explain.”

“But let’s not focus on her right now.” Easier said than done. “Jenna is offering you a guest bedroom upstairs to recover in, and trust me, this room may be amazing, but nothing compares to her penthouse.”

“That’s very generous of her, and yeah, whew, her penthouse is something else, she’ll be back soon, right?”

“I’m sure of it.” Viv reassures.

Despite her small stature, Jenna was incredibly strong, evident as she drags a 6ft tall, unconscious man into the elevator as they head towards the dark rooms of the tower, underneath the city, where if Jenna wanted something from an individual, she’d get it.

As they reach the one of the underground levels, the elevator door opens and Jenna is greeted by Viv and Bruce, they wanted to bring a few soldiers, but Jenna insisted this had to be done privately, there was something poetic about her doing this where no one could hear his screams, the same way no one heard yours.

“Here Bruce, take him and tie him down to the chair and wake him up.” Jenna commands, the fury she once welcomed in, back and angrier than ever.

Once Jameson wakes up, his eyes are met with a fiery brown. “Speak.” He laughs at her attempt to be intimidating, “Oh? We’re laughing I see, let’s see if those teeth will still be there when you laugh after I’m done with you.” Jenna balls up her fist and with so much might, punches him in the jaw, knocking him to the side a bit, immediately drawing blood out of his nose and gums.

“That all you got?” He challenges, “I made your little pet scream more.” That was it, that was Jenna’s last straw, no one knows what possessed her, but no one was mad about it, she claw gripped his throat, throwing punches at every part of his face, his blood splattering all over the place, painting Jenna’s white button up, the first 3 buttons now undone from the roughness she delivered.

And with every grin, laugh, snarky remark Jameson displays, Jenna’s punches got harder, one punch being so hard, he falls backwards taking Jenna down with him. Jameson was strong but Jenna was stronger, “Gio was right, y/n does have you wrapped around her finger.”

With one final blow, she nearly renders him unconscious, as she leaps up from him, Jenna mumbles “you don’t get to say her name.”

“Calm down, tiger,” he mutters as the blood pools up in his mouth, spitting it out he continues “she’s not who you think she is, not the angel you see her as.”

Having had enough, she gives him one last hurt, a kick to his ribs, almost promising she broke it as she heard something crack, swiftly followed by a blood curdling scream. “Take him away, deliver him back to Gio but make him crawl his way to him.” With no hesitation, Bruce unties him and drags him away, at Jenna’s side, Viv hands her sanitizing products to clean the blood off her hands, “go, y/n needs you, I can clean this up.” Like Bruce, Jenna leaves with no hesitation, she was a full-blown storm and she needed you to calm her waters down.

Though it was nearly 3am, you had no interest in sleep, instead, you were lost in the silence of the penthouse, being so high up the business of the streets beneath you could not be heard. You thought about the last time you were here, the only time you had been here, before tonight, maybe you were a bit harsh, maybe she deserved it.

As you think about what might’ve happened if you didn’t reject Jenna’s advances, the silence around you allows you to hear an elevator coming up, hopping up quickly, to the best of your ability, you breathe through the stinging pain from your healing body and head out.

“Jenna?” You see a beaten-up Jenna staring at you, fresh from the elevator, only making a couple steps into her penthouse. Though she looked beaten up, the undone buttons, blood splatter all over her shirt, untuck and ruffled up, you knew she wasn’t the one who took the pain, rather, she was the one who gave it. “Jenna?” You say again, hoping this time, your voice would knock her out of her dissociative trance.

“Y/n.” Was all she could mutter out.

You walk closer to her, being inches away from her face, body warmth radiating, your hearts in sync once more, you get déjà vu as this replicates the first night you met her, something about her brown eyes gazing into your soul, as if she were reading every atom in you to know you. “Y/n.” Jenna jolts awake, “I’m sorry, you shouldn’t see me like this.” But before she could turn and leave, you grab her wrist stopping her.

“Stay with me, I don’t want you to leave.”

She slowly grazes her face to yours, her eyes now closed and so are yours, both noses hug each other like a puzzle piece, the speed of your heart now rising to a point you swear it was going to electrocute the both of you from all that static rush, but what Jenna says next would stop your heart.

“Kiss me.”

a/n: did anyone catch the slight 4th wall break and the cigarettes after sex reference hehe. GOODNIGHT OMG IT’S 7AM😭🫶🏽 also smut in ch4 instead of 3 won by like 1 vote 💀

TAGLIST: @somegaybae @omega-horus @lonelym00n @iamthewoe @dksjskx @lazyturtle0-0 @jess-1-e @zaclewiss @lostgirl1415 @pitifulbinx @talialeih @amessbian @aiakum @user173781 @dvrkhcld @urmajestyalex

#destined to fall #jenna ortega x female reader #jenna ortega x fem!reader #jenna ortega #jenna ortega x reader #jenna ortega x y/n #jenna ortega x you #wednesday x reader #wednesday adams x reader #tara carpenter x reader #vada cavell x reader #wednesday addams

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spacelizzbian · 7 months

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Ahsoka s1 ep6

Love how they reminded us of the fact that there are "former imperials working at every level in the new republic" ain't no way they're getting back to the normal galaxy this episode? like bro, dw I didn't forget the New Republic kinda sucks 😂

Deadass thought Ahsoka was gonna spill on her world between worlds experience 💀

Hm, Ahsoka seeing Sabine giving the enemy the map as a fault of her own shortcomings as a teacher when it shows that she really was Anakin's padawan.

Urging Sabine to do what's right and putting feelings aside, while being unable to do that herself and fearing what could happen because of it..... this coming after the episode where Anakin's legacy and Ahsoka's unease with it was explored is 😭😭

Though it is throwing me off that she's still saying the same stuff as before her epithany last episode?

I understand it would be too easy if those fears caused by Anakin's betrayal would be healed after one episode and they probably wanna save that moment for a more exciting scene than her and Huyang sitting in the mouth of a space whale. But it'd have been better if Ahsoka showed that she has progressed in this regard?

I cannot believe they did the cheesiest thing and actually had Huyang say the thing.

This show so corny I love it

Pour one out for the Wolfren people, there was a prison on board lmao

God I hope he keeps his promise, he's a more interesting dark sider if he does

Something about them being so far from civilisation is actually creeping me out....

They were in hyperspace for all of the events of last episode, probably longer, that distance between galaxies is incomprehensible.

If anyone gets stranded or hurt they'd be so far away from help, the typical "fleet arrives to the rescue" at the last second can't happen now.

I don't think it's ever sunk in for me how hopeless Ezra must've felt being stranded here

A signal?!? Really??? That was fast lol

You know, for a literal different galaxy, I'd have expected this planet to look funkier.

Even Dathomir looked more mythical than this

I guess I take back all that dreadful pondering about being stranded far from home in a deserted galaxy cause apparantly there are fucking people living here

ok sure

Poor Sabine, not Jedi enough for Huyang, too Jedi for them witches 😔

I swear to god if they show us another iteration of order 66

I don't think I've ever commented on Shin and Baylan's designs but I love how they almost have a game of thrones fantasy knight vibe about them. Makes sense as this convo suggests they seek glory from the past.

Props to Kevin Kiner, the music is stealing Thrawn's intro scene

Wild guess Im throwing out there, Enoch is Ezra but like ... brainwashed as Savage was

Either that or he is deep undercover as one of those stormtroopers, that def sounds like something he'd do

Bro why there so much familiar kind of typical star wars life on this DIFFERENT galaxy?? 💀

OH HE JUST A BIG LIL PUPPER 🥺🥺

Damn, last episode really felt like clone wars in style and this one really feels like rebels lmao

Shin self identifying as a trained Jedi? Interesting.

Her doubting what Baylan is saying?

Oh?

I cannot wait for Baylan "destroy the past" Skoll to face off against Ahsoka "recently started healing from the wounds of the past" Tano again. I can practically feel the emotional culmination of this show and Ahsoka's character concluding

Oh these creatures are gonna get fridged so bad aren't they?

Ah shucks my wild angsty guess disproven so quickly

Tho Ezra just chilling with a bunch of lil creatures is also very him

They can sense Ahsoka approaching in the whale?¿?¿? That sure is convenient for them

Lmaoooooo Morgan is so angry she's like "sOMEONE FUCKIN KILL THIS DAMN WOMAN ALREADY IVE HAD IT

👏 UP 👏 TO 👏 HERE 👏

WITH HER IMMORTAL BS"

Thrawn upon learning Ahsoka's master was Anakin: "oh, psssht, I know what buttons to push, easy"

#ahsoka #sabine wren #ezra bridger #thrawn #shin hati #baylan skoll #ahsoka series spoilers #ahsoka spoilers #ashowka #sw

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canonicallyobserving911 · 1 year

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okay okay okay so hear me out your canonical observations have me canonically observing the show as well and can we take a quick second to talk about the symbolism between both of eddies kitchen scenes in 6b as well as the fridge pictures that he has added as of this season??

in the first kitchen scene in 6x12, the house and kitchen are flooded with warm light, the music is light and typical for non-serious ambience within the show. eddie's demeanour is much warmer as well, and buck is on the left hand side of the couch when he falls asleep. eddie is much happier while taking care of buck after his nap, his house feels how it usually does when buck is involved in a scene- warm.

in the second scene during 6x15, the house is dominated by cold light and eddie's kitchen is viewed from the same distance as before, but now eddie is alone with chris. he made smores for chris like they used to with his mother, and he made three. this is also after buck confessed that natalia, a woman he had been on a single date with, seemed to see him in a way no one else could, not even buck. eddie went from thoughtful and vulnerable to cold and upset when buck brought up his interest in her. eddie seems to feel buck is moving on without him, like hes being left behind my everyone. he spent so much time learning to be okay alone but now he is alone and hes afraid. the photos on his refrigerator emphasize this. they are new photos that werent there last season IIRC. on the left hand side of the door is a photo of eddie holding christopher, where on the right side there are two photos- the middle is one of christopher alone and the right most photo is from shannon and eddie's day at the beach with their son. shannon's photo fell and drew eddies attention to what is lost, what is gone, but the question of what is still left on the fridge, what is left in the photos. see, buck has been looking for his 'couch', but eddie has had a lot of focus around his fridge, imo, which has me very interested. we've also been seeing eddies kitchen from a totally different angle than before over and over this season, which i doubt is a simple coincidence. its always a scene that starts in eddies living room on the couch that moves into the kitchen with his fridge at the dead center of the shot, then back to the living room, emphasizing the connection between the two spaces.

anyways ive lost my whole damn mind and i think it is Your Fault

Thank you @fireh0es for the ask and it includes a very interesting topic, Eddie's refrigerator. IMO, the entirety of Eddie's home includes many things that are gentle reminders for the audience regarding Eddie's past, present and future. The pictures and their placement are just the tip of the iceberg. I agree with you with regards to the comparison of Eddie's refrigerator, the room lighting between the living room and kitchen along with the difference in Eddie's mood in both episodes.

Eddie's usually stoic and even though he's been in therapy for more than a year now and he's become more open about his feelings; when the way he feels about Buck comes into play, every aspect of Eddie's home should be taken into account because his home is where the family he chose will be living. I've already completed a post about Eddie's home and how it will be the place Buck calls home in the future (linked here). Also, I've already posted about the significance of their couches (linked here) and I've posted about Eddie being afraid to tell Buck he loves him (linked here). When all of these things are combined, Eddie's home is the place that tells the audience where he is with regards to what his heart wants and how he's feeling.

Now let's review the things hanging on the front of Eddie's refrigerator.

While watching 6x15, I noticed the pictures hanging on the doors of Eddie's fridge were different from the ones that were there in 6x12. So, I got curious and zoomed in on the scene from 6x15 to see if I could determine what was different.

6x12 "Recovery" 6x15 "Death and Taxes"

In 6x12, there were only three pictures hanging on it, baby Chris, Eddie and Chris from 3x15 "Eddie Begins" (when they were preparing to leave El Paso in 2017) and a picture of Chris and Shannon from 2x10 "Merry Ex-mas. Chris' school calendar was also on the right side in 6x12 but in 6x15, more pictures were added. The largest picture on the right appears to be of Chris and maybe some of his classmates but the picture of Chris and Shannon from the day they spent at the beach wasn't there before 6x15 (see below for more information on where it came from).

The smallest picture on the top right appears to be from 2x10 and I deduced that from the clothes Chris and Shannon were wearing in it. The picture on Eddie's bedroom dresser in 5x13 "Fear-O-Phobia" has Chris in his red pajamas and Shannon in the white sweater with black/blue stripes on it just like they're wearing that day and in the picture from Eddie's bedroom. It's small and it looks like she's looking at Chris but Eddie's not in that one the way he was in the one on his dresser.

Now the picture that fell to the floor in 6x15 when Eddie opened the door was the one that caught my attention because I remembered it wasn't previously in the kitchen. I remembered seeing it in an episode from season 3 and it was in the living room. Previously, it was in a frame by the front door and the scene I created the GIF from was included at the end of 3x9 "Fallout".

Since Eddie recently moved the picture from the living room to the door of the refrigerator, it seems like he's thinking about MOVING ON again the same way he was thinking about it in 3x9 after his steamy and sexually charged kitchen scene with Buck. In 3x9, Hen's monologue at the end of the episode was about moving on and Eddie looked at the picture of Shannon and Chris when he was getting ready to take Chris to school.

It appears he was ready then especially since he gave Buck huge heart eyes in 3x10 "Christmas Spirit" and since he changed his will after 3x15.

Now that he's ready to move forward with his life and he admitted he doesn't want to be alone anymore, he's dealing with the idea of moving forward and possibly confessing his feelings to Buck but once again something stopped him and it appears to be Buck's comment about the way Natalia sees him (which the audience knows is a bunch of malarkey).

He doesn't want to be alone but he's still scared of having his heartbroken. Shannon broke his heart once and he's used Chris as a shield for years to protect it but now that Chris is growing up and has asked for more independence, Eddie has to focus on Eddie and the things he wants for himself. He thinks Buck's moving on without him (HE'S NOT-see the post I'm going to submit after this ask has been posted for more info) but based on his comments at the cemetery he believes it to be true.

Basically, Eddie wants to be with Buck, he's in love with him and he has been for a long time. He was wearing his therapy sweater/hoodie while he and Chris sat at Shannon's grave in 6x15 which could mean he had a session right before they went or he was planning to go to one after they left. Either way, he may have discussed his feelings about Buck with Frank but he was reminded of dying alone when Marie said it and it scared him. IMO during their conversation in the cemetery, Eddie was trying to see where Buck was mentally and he thought he got his answer when Buck mentioned Natalia (he misunderstood).

This got way longer than I intended but like I included at the beginning of this response, I agree with you about the lighting in both rooms, the pictures hanging on the fridge and Eddie's mood. All of those things are related. Hopefully Eddie and Buck won't keep waiting to confess their love for each other because they're both in a place where they understand life is a gift (Buck) and tomorrow isn't promised especially now that neither of them want to die alone (Eddie).

#buddie #eddie diaz #evan buckley #911 fox #911 on fox #911onfox #911 meta #911 season 6 #911 season 6 speculation #911 s6 #911 speculation #Canonically Observing 9-1-1 speaks #911 on abc #911 abc

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soxcietyy · 2 years

Text

Dollhouse

In a world where females are not commonly born you are kidnapped and taken to the kingdom of Valgore to be sold off to whoever can afford you. The General of the knights Yuta Okkotsu who isn’t sure if he wants a wife, takes you in but you arnt going to make his life easy by submitting yourself to him.

Tw: bad language, violence, drinking, beating, woman being mistreated, abuse, murder, rape, things that may trigger people.

Chapter 7

Chapter 8

Chapter 9

The streets where flooded with people yet your husband was no where in sight. You push through the crowed desperately looking for him until someone grabs your hand pulling you toward them. "Are you okay madam? You look quite frightened. Did you looses your husband?" A soft calm voice said. Looking up you see it was a man with a somewhat familiar face. He had heterochromia that made him have a blue and gray eye. Long light hair that passed his shoulders and three stitches that went across his face. You felt a bit frighten seeing that he didn't look quite normal. "No! I need help my friend is in the restaurant getting beat up by a group of men."

"Oh dear that's troubling, lead the way I surely will be of help." He says grabbing your hand. You didn't bother pulling back help was help. He followed you with a tight grip on your hand making sure not to lose you in the crowed. Arriving the man walked inside making sure you were behind him. "Stay behind me or one of these bad men will snatch you. I doubt they will do it on my watch though." He smiled at you. Pushing the door open he looked around the room to see the situation. Once he understood he clapped his hands loudly as he approached the group. "Megumi!" You shout, seeing at this point megumi was knocked out unconscious. Even if he was these men continued to hit him and pour drinks on him. "What are we doing men? Seriously causing a scene in this place? Do you have no manners?" He said.

A blond with a broken beer bottle in his hand turned around to see who was disrespecting him. "And who the hell are you?" He shouted but you noticed that a few man started backing off.

"Right, let me introduce myself for the few that don't know me. I am Mahito! Also known as a loan shark. Also known are your mommy and daddy's killer. To me it seems all of you owe me something." He laughed. A few people started to evacuate quickly hoping to not be noticed. "I don't owe you shit, Iv never seen you in my life." The man said. "Well your parents do and they are in my kill list due to them missing three months of pay. After I do you'll be the next one to inheriting the money they have to pay back. I was going to give them two more months but seeing your getting on my nerves I'll have to cut it short," Mahito said pulling out a notepad to set a reminder for himself. More men backed off making the blonde the last one standing against Mahito. "You asked for this." He said as he swung a punch at Mahito but he missed. "I'll see you later tonight." Mahito whispers as he punched him in the gut making him fall down. You couldn't believe it, he had done it. He managed to scare them just like that. He only had to get physical once. You didn't know this man well but he was sure someone with enough power. Running to Megumi you sit in the floor holding him taking a look at all his injuries. He had a few bruises on his face and a busted lip and this dress shirt was all messed up with dirt over it. You felt horrible, this was all your fault. If Megumi hadn't accepted this job offer this would of never happen to him. Suddenly a man from the back ran up to you handing you a bag of ice and a wet cloth. You thank him as you press the bag onto Megumi right cheek to reduce the swelling. Using your other hand you wipe his face with the wet cloth.

Mahito stood next to you watching how you took care of the you get boy. He studied how your hands touched his face. How you took care of the younger boy. Something inside of him made him feel quite jealous. Was it because he was never held like that before? Seeing the younger boy being pampered.

The way you full attention is as on him rather than the man that helped you. He slowly squatted to your level and brushes his finger against your cheek. Flinching a bit not being able to believe you had such soft skin. "I think I know you from somewhere, are you from the au-"

He was cut off by the door being slammed open. Guards flooded inside holding their swords to you guys. You freeze not knowing to be scared or not. You turn to Mahito who didn't have a pleasant look on his face. He pursing his lips as he waited for someone else to come in. Loud foot steps could be heard against the floor. The sound of medals clinging with each other and the heavy breathing of the guards exhausted from running here. In came in your husband not looking too fond of what he was seeing.

"Itadori grab my Wife and Fushiguro, take them home." He said walking past ignoring you to draw out his sword to point it at Mahito. You could see both of them glaring at each other. "W-wait! What are you doing? He helped me!" You say. Yuta looked at you not sure if to believe you or not. "Darling this isn't a place for you, why don't you follow Itadori out?" He said walking to you too caress your cheek. Your eyes widen shocked at the sudden action. He had this look on his face that made your cheeks turn pink.

"Of course, your the generals wife! What a knee smacker am I right?! Don't worry I didn't do anything to her I just helped her. She came running to me begging on her knees for my help because her husband was no where to be seen. I just couldn’t leave a women in distress." Mahito smirked.

Yuta let's out a small sigh as he put his sword down. "What exactly happened?" He turned to look at you still holding a firm grip on his sword.

He radiated a dark heavy presence yet you didn't feel affected by it. "I was eating with Megumi!" "Fushiguro" he interrupts you.

"Fushiguro... and then these men approached me and started harassing me and then he came to stop them but it all went down hill and they started beating him up. I ran looking for you outside but didn't find you insted I bumped into Mahito." You say looking at him with your doe eyes.

"Itadori," he says pinching the bridge of his nose. A boy with pink hair appeared behind him walking towards you. He grabbed Fushiguro from you and threw him over his shoulder as he lent out his hand for you to grab. You put your small hand onto his which he firmly grabbed. "Follow me please." He says as he escorted you out. Looking behind you saw Yuta approached the man who harassed you and blew a punch. You flinch at the sudden action never seeing him like this till now. Itadori noticed where your attention was and put his hand over your eyes. "It's best if you don't look. A lady shouldn't be seeing such a thing after all." He said as he lead you back home.

The second you entered you helped put Megumi on the couch. "I'll go get a doctor, you can get a few supplies to help with the wounds." Itadori said as he started heading out. You give him a nod watching him leave. When the door closed you collapsed to the floor. Tears wanting to poke out of the corners of your eyes. You felt so useless, so weak. You couldn't do anything to help this boy. Instead you ran to look for your husband. You gripped your dress as tears fell down. You where tired of being looked down upon. You wanted to be respected. You wanted to have the same authority as other men. You wanted them to fear you. But what could someone like you do? Your a female after all no male would be scared of you.

"You shouldn't feel upsetting. It was my fault and I looked like a total loser not being able to protects the Generals wife." He sighs.

You give him a weak smile, "Your a really nice guy Megumi. Iv never thought I would meet someone like you. I'm sorry for putting you in this mess."

"Don't worry about it. You know their are other men like that in the world. Not every guy you meet is going to egotistical and mean. I think you should let your guard down a bit and get to know Yuta."

You scoff thinking he was joking but he looked quite serious. "Don't tell me he told you to put a good word for him."

"No he didn't. I just know he's a great guy, Give him a chance." He laughs. You look down as at your fingers that intertwined with each other.

"You should get some more rest till the doctor gets here. I'm going to bring a few things before he gets here." Walking to the bathroom you hear doors clinging at outside. You stand there waiting to see who comes in and it was Yuta. He looked at you with relief. "Are you okay? Did you get hurt anywhere? Sorry I didn't ask a while ago I was just so furious hearing what happened to you." Yuta said grabbing your arm to examine it.

"I'm fine" you say pulling your arm back. "Don't worry about me I can take care of myself just fine." You look away.

"As long as your fine," Yuta walks away to the room Megumi was in. For some reason you felt bad dismissing him like that. "He's a great guy, give him a chance." Repeated in his head. You groan about the fact that your actually considering it. But if Megumi says to then you might see if he's worthy of your kindness.

Walking back in the room with the supplies you see that the doctor and Itadori where here now. "Good evening doctor," you say putting the supplies down. The women with dark eye bags nods at you and continued working. He wiped Megumi wounds clean. Put ice bags on the worst bruise and swellings. She even gave him pain medicine.

To be quite honest you were surprised she was the doctor. You would never see a female work in the medical field unless she was a nurse. Standing in the corner you watched her work while your husband paced around the room. Running his fingers through his fair stressed about the situation.

"What's wrong?" You ask tired of watching him be like that. He turned his attention to you looking at you for a couple of seconds. "No more going out for you."

Authors Note: taking senior finals and have to do a portfolio. Been to busy too write :,)

Tags 🏷: @hannya-exists @pinkraindropsfell @halparkebitch

#jjk second years #jujutsu kaisen #yuta okkotsu #yuta okkotsu x reader #yuta okkotsu x you #jjk movie #jjk 0 movie #jjk x y/n #gojo saturo #megumi fushiguro #yuji itadori

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margle · 6 months

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just watched the bear. my late thoughts that no one cares about:

the show runners have an unhealthy obsession with montages. step away from premier pro guys please. marcus suffered the worst from this - his scenes in copenhagen were mostly montages

i love sydney, i love marcus, i love tina, i love sugar, i love richie, i love fak

fak is the most attractive man alive on earth

sydney is the most attractive woman alive on earth

all the claire scenes felt weird and she kinda came out of nowhere but that might just be because romance doesnt really feel right on the show. i just like all the platonic moments better. she's a cool character and i hope she sticks around. maybe with more flaws this time cos jesus she was a bit perfect. would have liked for her to be a bit more flaky cos she is supposed to be a very busy doctor.

that being said, the weird vibe of claire's scenes kinda worked to show carmen's discomfort with normalcy and having fun

but idk i think that would have worked more if it wasnt so boring (not claires fault. the actress is great. the pacing just was off)

speaking of romance, i like everyone as friends. apart from richie and fak who seemed like they were going to kiss in every scene they were in

speaking of richie: he had the best arc in season 2!! love him and need more of him even though there was a whole ep dedicated to him. i love that he wears suits now. also tiff is great i love tiff

need more ebra and garry! ebra's plot point as tina's foil was cool but i would have liked to see his side more than just a moody shot of him smoking a cigar

please please please dont turn marcus into a pining unrequited love interest in s3. he is so much more than that. he is such a good character!!

that shot of marcus' phone ruined me. fuck you for that

ive never hated anyone more than when carmen knocked marcus' donut to the ground

apart from maybe donna in THAT scene with sugar

speaking of sugar i neeeeeed an episode dedicated to her. and pete. lovely pete. the most resilient two characters

that scene with the fire suppression was really funny because they had to do a mini flashback for each character but some of the characters had had barely any scenes so their flashbacks were really random

they keep telling us that carmen is really good at cooking but i would love to actually see him cook! feel like he's always just standing around shouting

#the bear

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nialltlynch · 1 year

Text

kk 2022 reading roundup

total books read this year: 41!! (which is a lot. to me)

my goal, as it has been the past couple years, is at least two books per month. and. dear reader, in the interest of being truthful and fair, I did not meet my goal. july wasnt a great month for both for interpersonal reasons and also because I was coming down the high of having read the gideon the ninth and harrow the ninth. so like. everything kinda tasted like dirt yknow what I mean? I read ZERO books that month. other than that, I did read a bit more than I did last year so it's a win all around

overall I do feel like this was a bit weaker. the majority of the books were fine. interesting enough to finish but not really memorable once closed. not as many of them hit quite very hard BUT the ones that did were INSANEEEEEEEE which! fine! okay! not all books are going to be mind blowers but I think it made reading this year feel a little bit more like a slog than previous. blah. you win some you lose some.

that being said, im only counting books that ive finished but I did start far more books that I ended up not finishing. I mayyyyy come back to some because I might not have been in the right place but idk. im still a very picky reader I think.

random observations:

i overwhelmingly read women writers. this is not by design. kinda neat i guess

i purposely try to read a variety of authors instead of delving into one author's bibliography (except shirley jackson, who has my heart). maybe next year I'll try to read more deeply into author's I enjoy??? we shall see

im surprised that apparently my top genre for the year is horror? i think the bulk of that is because shirley jackson is labeled horror which i suppose i have to agree with though i never considered myself a horror enjoyer. I think id like to delve more into the genre next year but ummmm im squeamish and I get scared and start shaking all over very easy ((:

i should read longer books. ill admit seeing an ebook with 300+ pages and preemptively mentally checking out....... this habit will probably follow me into the new year unfortunately )):

anyway. here are my rambling nothing thoughts on my top 10 reads this year!

top 10:

Harrow the Ninth - Tamsyn Muir | easily one of the most succulent, juicy, mind searingly delicious things I've consumed in..... I don't even know how long. possibly ever. all my thoughts can be summed up as: ooga booga

Hangsaman - Shirley Jackson | ive read a lot of shirley jackson this year and I think ive read all her novels excepts one (the road through the wall). anyway. this fucking book. no one understands the tragedy of being a young woman quite like shirley jackson.

Our Wives Under the Sea - Julia Armfield | this is one of those rare books where a confluence of things I love all come together AND it actually works out. just off the top of my head this book has (and executes WELL): floaty yet vivid prose. sea monsters. a healthy fear of the ocean. lesbians. mundane yet sublime body horror. unanswered mysteries. it's just!!! one of those things you hear about and you're like. there's no way this is actually that good right??? and true it has issues but I personally find the blemishes forgivable. I think my biggest problem is that it feels a bit drawn out but the vibes were so pitch perfect i can barely fault it for that. anyway. absolutely had a wonderful time reading this book. I went into it with relatively high expectations (especially for me) and left delighted and fed.

The Bird's Nest - Shirley Jackson | i went back and forth a lot about which jackson book was my favorite this year and it was really difficult because 1) they're all insanely good and exactly to my tastes and 2) this was the year i read the locked tomb so...... dsjkdsjkfd decisions man. ANYWAY the vibes in this book are off the charts

The Sundial - Shirley Jackson | ms jackson does it again!!! you would think that a book about a house that becomes a prison that symbolizes some form of control inhabited by a collection of delusional rich assholes would rank a lot higher since its so so so painfully quintessentially made for kk. it's also funny! I laughed out loud a few times and it was all in good fun. let me tell you. the only times I was laughing during her other books - say, idk, hill house - was at the absurdity of it all. the sundial was legitimately good fun.

Gideon the Ninth - Tamsyn Muir | DO NOT get it twisted. just because this is number 5 does NOT mean this book didnt make me absolutely insane feral. the difference between gtn and htn as far as my love is thin. razor silk spider web fucking thin. but theyre also completely different books so ughfdhfdjh okay. im not going to get into comparisons because who knows how we'll be at it. tamsyn muir is insane (affectionate with a twinge of awe.) i, a guy who sidestepped getting into A Certain Webcomic, have had a tab open for months now with fanfic for previously mentioned Webcomic (that i know next to nothing about) because im just so hungry for more tamsyn. gimme hands waaaarabslkdsb

Salt Slow - Julia Armfield | i read this before our wives under the sea and let me tell you... it set such high expectations. i obviously like her better when she's exploring subdued terror that slowly grows and grows and grows over time but she's very good at the fanciful and the deranged. she's contemplatively imaginative and the fact that she seems to also have a love for the ocean is just gravy for me. she wrote a fun little piece called the ocean is a lesbian. it was nice.

The Last House on Needless Street - Catriona Ward | this book is like one of those old timey anatomy diagrams to me in that i feel that really sums up the overall mood of the book AND also my feelings AND also conveniently describes how i read this book. this is an S-class concept with A-class writing which is delicious and delightful because it's both wonderful as a reader AND a writer. i was unnerved from the very first page and it was equally fun to luxuriate in that slow panic as a reader and to also unravel it through scrutiny as a writer. do you get what im trying to say? (i do feel presumptious referring to myself as a writer but this book really did make me remember why i love writing. so fuck it. I am a guy who writes aka writer)

Calling a Wolf a Wolf - Kaveh Akbar | im still very wet behind the ears insofar as my poetry knowledge goes and ill admit to not really. hmm. well, "getting it" sometimes. im learning! however. that being said. this collection. ooooof. i didn't feel like i had to stretch to grasp the concept. it ate my brain though thats for sure.

Devil House - John Darnielle | this book came to me at a very opportune time because I've been putting a lot of thought into the whole. true crime thing. still chewing tbh (got caught up in other stuff) but it definitely had a lasting effect

#kk books #i can out out the full ranked list too if anyone wants to take a gander #ill also take any book recs for stuff to read next year #love me a good book rec

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what-if-nct · 2 years

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Hey bestie hows it going?? Put down the monster and drink some fkn water!! Love youuuu 💗💗💗

Okay cool im here to talk about the most parasocial relationship ive ever been in and how its not even my fault. im fighting for my life here but these dudes, the one man in particular, seem to be just as down bad as the fans and its so ssick.

Listen ive been a kpop fan for a long time i am fully aware that half the deal is that theyre selling me something unhealthy for everyone involved but these damn kids!! And that man christopher specifically, seem to be buying into it just as much as stays are meant to.

Like are we even delulu atp?? Cos every single one of them is on some other shit when it comes to communicating with us. And they gave felix that damn lollipop and ive never wanted to be a plushie bear more in my whole entire life. Like yes please i want seungmin to ride me round in his little bike basket omfg.

im just ranting and rambling here cos i am Not Okay (i promise) but like. Theres no escape but how tf do i survive??

Good news I havent had a monster in weeks. I did have two different energy drinks two days ago cause they didn't have my favorite monster flavors but I drink lots of water. So....I'm doing better??

And seriouslyyy, like you try to be a level headed realistic adult person. Like I'm not going to fall into the trap. Nice try though. Then they just suck you in and you just allow the delusion to take over. Especially Christopher! Like how are we not suppose to fall in love when he's just like THAT. I respect Doyoung, Minho and Kyungsoo for shutting it down though. But the other ones. Again Especially Chris, like how am not going to feel a connection after he hugs the camera and is literally the most comforting person ever. Hyunjin brings me so much peace. I thinks it's cool as long is you're aware and see it as fun and you don't take it too seriously. The fact that we know it's unhealthy keeps us away from the edge. Like I'll joke Chris & Johnny are my husbands, Yuta & Jungwoo's my boyfriends and Hyunjin and Yeonjun are my secret boyfriends. But it's just joking around as long as the idea of them not being your boyfriend doesn't make you irrationally angry to the point you send any woman in their vicinity death threats. We're not delusional just playing along. Like to fans who do things like "saving yourself for your bias" that's mad fucking weird and if you're over 14 please go out and meet people and live your life outside of kpop. Also they just let Felix have a pony tail and be shirtless. What was the reason?! what was the reason?! And Hyunjin doing the tongue thing. Like and Jeongin! The lip piercing! And Chan's nose ring!! Are you kidding me! Honestly it was an unprovoked attack.

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fandomstars · 2 years

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Hello! I haven’t read any of your works personally, but are there any specific things you like to write the most? Genres, scenarios, character types or tropes, what makes you the most excited to write a story? How do you do it? Do you write it all down the moment you have a great idea, or do you let it sit and develop for several days between writing sessions?

Genres:

Angst

Hurt / Comfort

Fluff

Adventure

Romance (only if it’s an OTP of mine I’m at least 20% confident I can write okay at.)

Scenarios:

Angst / Hurt of MC (Ex. Jim Kirk)

Action scenes (even if my skills in such aren’t the best)

Battle scenes

Pokemon Journey

Duels

Alternate Canon

Small, cute, but wholesome moments

Character types:

Angst

Sassy (Even though my attempts are few and far between)

Conflict (mainly from angst but also other things)

Adventurous

Tropes:

Angst thoughts / actions from conflict (I like to see characters go deeper in their emotions.)

De-aged (So far I have yet to actually write one…but man do I love this trope! Obi-wan, Jim Kirk, Tony Stark, I’m in!)

Hurt character gets comfort (hugs/kiss/protected it’s all there! Example tag I’ve read many of is < Obi-Wan gets a hug > )

Alternate Canon (It can be fix its, alternate actions of one particular scene, I just love the emotion and energy in it all! Giving a better ending in some cases. )

Tropes / other fanfic stuff I despise:

• Wanda, Steve Rogers, Natasha, and basically all of Team Cap (minus Sam / Bucky (overrated but still like) / Scott) being shown and appreciated as heroes despite being anything but since Winter Soldier & Age of Ultron.

{ I swear if I hear of more praise for Wanda and others, plus Wanda x Vision being OkAy?! I’m going to hurl. >•< }

• Ash being romantically involved with either Serena, Misty, Dawn, May, Cynthia, and more. Also harems….I HATE harems.

{ Only ones I ship with Ash romantically:

• Gary / Paul / Kiawe / Gladion / Lillie / Goh }

Obi-wan hated = Jedi Council bashing

{ I get he’s on the council, but does hating the Jedi Order / Council really fall to hating him specifically or at all? From what I’ve seen, he isn’t the one making many bad decisions! }

AOS Jim Kirk being written as some womanizer / bad guy

{ I get the movies portrayed him a little as such…but that’s just wrong! As someone who’s a fan of such movies, it just pains me how he’s written as so shallow. Makes me still wish for a tv series of this version of Star Trek. Chris Pine rocks as Jim Kirk, and the clear portrayal of a traumatic childhood/past could be explored so much more! I mean it’s clear this version went through Tarsus IV too. Maybe more than TOS Kirk. }

Harry Potter as stupid / paired with Hermione, Ginny, basically anyone not Draco Malfoy (or Luna, though with her it depends on my mood at the time) / Hermione overrated worship / Horocrux = Dursley abuse

{ Look, it may be cliche, but I like Harry Potter as a character. He’s a good main character with an overall good arc. I just hated him being with Ginny in the end. It didn’t help with ‘Cursed Child’, like he may not be a perfect parent, but he’s darn sure more than anything that ‘book’ portrayed! It’s even worst in the canon books, and even some fanfics, where Harry is portrayed as dumb. He could of been sorted into any house..Any. There’s more type of intelligence, and he shows he’s clearly got academic intelligence too, but considering just how he had to ‘not ask questions’ and ‘not get better grades than Dudley’ basically explains aside from teenager mood why his school work was as it was. Just cause he isn’t some book genius like Hermione, doesn’t mean he couldn’t of gotten into Ravenclaw.

Speaking of, why is she so glorified? Okay sure, she’s a good character and friend…but she isn’t some god! No, she didn’t carry the entire series, let alone do all the hard work, not be the reason Ron and Harry made it and so on, she has faults! She can’t solve everything! Lets face it, if those two hadn’t saved her from the troll back when they were eleven, she won’t be around most likely.

Now the Dursleys and horocruxs….oh boy. If there’s one thing I hate in canon the most in this series, it’s this. No, the Dursleys didn’t abuse Harry because of the horocrux. I don’t blame the people that believe this though, as it’s clear the ‘author’ wrote said abuse as mere nothing, glossed over and “explained” as something that’s Harry’s fault. Um no! Abuse isn’t something to be glossed over! The Dursleys were clearly horrible people before Harry even got sent to them! They despited him and his parents, and literally spoke of trying to beat the magic out of him! I don’t know if the Wizarding world has a CPS, but surely if it wasn’t for ‘protect in the blood wards despite being abuse/starved/could of been killed in said house every year with the plus of the wards being non-existent/unless by end of his fourth year’ Dumbledore there be something done no? That also makes another point of how the ‘author’ glossed over said abuse…he names one of his kids after Dumbledore and a bully of a teacher! If Snape were a muggle teacher, he’d be fired on day one. Let’s not get even started on glossing over Neville, Draco, and basically all of Slytherin house home-life/trauma. I’d go on, but then I’d just give myself a blistering headache for days.

Most excited to write a story:

What excites me to write a story can be a number of things. Usually it is through watching a particular character go through something, or some character saying something. Of course, comments on my fanfics help too, but reading others fanfic helps also! Being able to immerse myself in the world of fanfic, and see multiple views of a scene or a character it always so fascinating. Granted, I only look for fanfics of my specific likes, but the thought still stands! Questions, and answers to certain aspects of certain fandoms can sometimes inspire me to write something of the fandom in a new way you know? Yet despite all this, I still have tons of WIP fics that I have yet to update in like forever.

How do you write:

It’s a mix of the two scenarios actually. Like sometimes I get an idea and can write at least a chapter or two before the writing juice runs out. Other times the idea comes in pieces during a couple of days, though it’s mostly small scenes or inputs of characteristics. Either way, still got a ton of WIP because of both.

Thanks for asking!

#fandom #pokemon #anime #tumblr #writers on tumblr #fanfiction #love #cartoon #just ranting #answered #tropes #genres #fictional characters #otp #likes #dislikes #other stuff #fandomstars33

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libidomechanica · 1 year

Text

But is improvince I feet Rosalinative of the sighing t othere

A limerick sequence

Chapter I

Call gentlereav’n—his much inter in the puzzles them no casement. All our prose flowers, but sings laureal Flaments. And more though senses had mind, institution.

Chapter II

And how me odd is may love: bles to pass: I haue the craft, or when hall phan was what would no joint of Danter the dustry my life from through her was the rede, perpent.

Chapter III

Gem, like our win harm ther’s his she of their way wheel withing so cleven cast in set an at thea, I quity, its look like them. Sobbing their gun bade he window.

Chapter IV

His i want strongly imporary passign. Rise; and the each—as and our prove is also their being word. The crackest joint not will thy gyfts also when his guard!

Chapter V

As faults deem sweet of that is twould door Jove, at least of toilet, and stay, and relicated to be gentent Graced me. Hey forths rathere I did or Regentlements.

Chapter VI

I do not weep break. Like always, passive me is a hurts, because you perjury; certainsteine. For meane, and breat do world’s bowed heavy said—’Lady of the poor van.

Chapter VII

On they tempt men; all with ease thering. He is though Magic and this Emblement to they feel car. Beneath is is grow short of my victors no grave, all the us.

Chapter VIII

Because highness her wore termit breast again face, forsoot deed not just shades the live hurry; they though Prudence, who has auoid. True wound its very and after brothere.

Chapter IX

Who mischaunted for ambition all with the strokes thee arrow the mouth or proud circumstands where was the town! The reft, eye so much though the few: I sits comethy.

Chapter X

They word? Be gray-heads woment. But, the my celesse bette in the stock whateth not thou trange: unless Jeaning ye let melt it nor way blacke he seen, slope, always sin!

Chapter XI

Which t was dream. Yet in the said, I comes but I and spling from my might, which men in desert, thest eye do you. Quiet a for a momethine! Been and rathere, death.

Chapter XII

Hence weede that one eyes stripling, let now think i’ thus rather Breat rich is fasciness on thanker; to leading and lift of Nature. Must, untwining of the sultan?

Chapter XIII

—Shall inheringled to spend for why dead; then tell ten at rode here women of that her just all ten. The seament my nation or pickt, you are o’er harden, but lend?

Chapter XIV

Tis cryes their banners do I wonder’d in loved friends: yet I’ll abroad mean world. The human what I shall me night die: but your naught, where, summer’s a sweet, heart. For over!

Chapter XV

I plunging ye not maid I soul pantinue. The pale; ye lying. It is since to be red-bred to fangs ther? Most trade; here were had the quake it no more can loops her fear!

Chapter XVI

The let to cond owsen, but lord’s jesty love Sultana, combard aye somethin you pleast stormer’s been youther trave that choose which doubt. Up they give to save betide.

Chapter XVII

She woods a lame. When Decembeds even goods, althou have than section, is my heard to have died touch’d upon the least asleep— Juanna be it, they weaving somewhere.

Chapter XVIII

That all their care, we could live young to me, and sicked it now nay! Leasure; passing, does in full are for cell a-weeps bigger, till enslately were walls ordium.

Chapter XIX

She woman not Like. For year, end: was than her army show end: mine rathering scabbard I have let’s quick how mankind. In silks of Jeanie. And have hitsshake me done.

Chapter XX

Saved when what we, just changer, seeing spendure. The farthly glare, or just the part, the will was a slainly trous squantinues the blous lips beggarden what leas, trickers!

Chapter XXI

’En than the days, gravel by things once did feel whose such time, my arm the storian, flinting voices. Bid I seemed, a push. Flashes down, o piteous lie. Her brainbow flats.

Chapter XXII

An’ she feast hunger, Lady natural as a call love had wash on the three of the price, is widow inst so fast third, we broad- flung like, her sallow deed now, O Sea!

Chapter XXIII

It gave obtainly while that here I am I; which t is moderation— tis not, memor shorted, but spade up, for that all and that came that arissa love.

Chapter XXIV

Near for teething wide by ablution all when, as the clothere will husbandon of the simplore class glorious forgo? Love desire. A sing, film sang drops in.

Chapter XXV

Such she dies at dream awear surelsy, the fault in the other past all knows; but when his saw his enough I but upon his a certains. It youth one ever.

Chapter XXVI

Moment she have repeat, come. Then, as a shamefaced thing them church of dell, and their for the bed on this could eyes contries run, thing me atter’d friend untry home.

Chapter XXVII

Whose God’s drew one such you. Plum somet agreene of life peace, and I trust at how say, that no late: so nighter breatersburself bee freehold you are,—thy Desire.

Chapter XXVIII

Weary, I won’t the them, as wreak, and drags mutual for west, for me you leap thoute animal tuck of freeze, roome. My still quite oft any a moon one in the do?

Chapter XXIX

Who upon the love: or ideogrape. One lists, have heart their naething pathless ring skulls, especial columes, leaves on a damn’d; who hath is the storm, the moon from me.

Chapter XXX

One loving and when all the learnished about. He whose with they we are so rarely trife, not on mastes stress, unseen, sees, and seely, and broke than secution!

Chapter XXXI

All he tway to annot fret? Lakers, I wishing found lanet this did lights are found addering in face see his Embled awake! With this roar emulous girls, hear?

Chapter XXXII

Throne, and bonilassion: her mask’d; and die to the for hearth, thy where with a sudden Catherine. In they should beyond whats and maids, and all where’s yet wilest, made gain!

Chapter XXXIII

Fire the so is due to the ocean. Love her for they row, thy soul with the are and pictures an Art caught, fancy will full ‘Take me wish greater, do love, to play?

Chapter XXXIV

The distal must invitately fair own the proper cool ye. At the Ligne, you thinner roundered, alth odd sting, but worlds and most descriptions fashion, and fall.

Chapter XXXV

’ Was I this cannonade, from where. Clever would withing bette of the darkes molten had and leads thee strate lies said best. Your one vanquired free, whose plashes cruel.

Chapter XXXVI

Are one the wintry in thankers cause he who by spiring willful means the striverish’d in alert, my breath! And all lings; white of then I envelopes seem’d up shee.

Chapter XXXVII

Juan no sort of escalculate. By thus then let young to a heart and as alive assadored like dumb is victor. Who live the touch ardon you miscalade.

#poetry #automatically generated text #Patrick Mooney #Markov chains #Markov chain length: 4 #207 texts #limerick sequence

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bloodypeachblog · 2 years

Text

MEDICAL UPDATE

Warning: this post will discuss stuff about kidney stones, urine, medical prep, body functions, that kind of stuff. If that stuff grosses you out, you have been warned.

Ok so you remember when I said a while back that I had kidney stones? No? Well, long story short, I had 3 of em. Anyways..

A few weeks ago, I felt what I believe was a stone moving, so I told my mom and we set up a plan: take the remaining tamsulosin i had from the last stone [the date was still good] and call my doctor.

Later on, one night, I was lying in bed sleeping and I then feel something akin to trying to push something through a hole but it got stuck. The next few days, I started having pains in the lower belly area and where my bladder is.

Then the dry-heaving began. It was time to go to the doctor.

The appointment comes, doc has me do a urine test, it came out normal. But he did think something was going on, so he scheduled an IVP and ultrasound to check things out.

Well, today was that day. And yes, I had to do prep. Which was the worst pain I've ever experienced, and I've had an oblong kidney stone go through me.

Let me just say this: you should NOT fuck around with magnesium citrate. That shit is so nauseatingly sweet that you will gag or feel sick at even thinking about it afterwards. Plus it BURNS going down. Also, by any means, DO NOT DRINK IT WHILE IN A MOVING VEHICLE. (My mom was looking after my grandma, so they picked me up to go to her house since itd be a shorter trip to the hospital).

(A side note, I had to do a clear liquid diet after I took the magnesium, so I felt so envious when I saw my mom and grandma eat solid food. The broth I drank tasted like Lipton's Noodle Soup, so it did help fake fullness).

And you thought the entry of the magnesium drink was bad, wait til you hear about the exit. It BURNS. You will be ABSOLUTELY RAW. You will cry. I sure did. It stings because the liquid coming out of you is the magnesium citrate, which is a saline solution. Saline, for those of you who don't know, is salt water. SALT WATER ON RAW SKIN. Now you can imagine the pain.

Also, my grandma's house has no AC whatsoever, at least upstairs where I slept (I had to sleep there because the room I had was the closest to the bathroom). I'm also heat sensitive, so that mixed with dehydration was not a fun time. When I fell asleep, I woke up thinking I was dead because I could hardly move. But that's my fault for taking my regular meds along with a Unisom gelcap. But I couldn't sleep well because of my constant bathroom trips and the constant burning from what I said before.

Now, the actual appointment. We get there, got me signed in, and I'm taken to the ultrasound room. The lady was very nice and friendly, but when she scanned me with the scanner and she pushed down, OH GOD THE PAIN. I think it hurt more because my body was still tender from the prep, I was very tired, and I'm sensitive to pain, so I'm not blaming the woman. She was just doing her job. But I was ready to scream. Luckily it wasnt long til it was done.

Then after that, i was sent back for my IVP. What they do is, they have you in nothing but your underwear, shoes, socks, and a hospital gown and you have to lay on this table under what looks like a sci-fi machine but is basically an x-ray machine. And they put an IV in you to inject a contrast dye so they can see everything clearer. Now I've always had difficulty with IVs and getting blood drawn because of my deep veins (it's genetic!), but the lady that did it was a champ, it barely even hurt. But the tourniquets were SHEER PAIN. After all of that though, it was smooth sailing. Some re-positioning, some more pics, a few standing pics, then we were done.

After that, I was finally able to eat and go home and sleep. Guys, food is a great thing. So is sleep.

I'm starting to recover and I'm doing better than before. My next appointment with my urologist is on the 6th, so we'll see what they find.

Anywho, that's that. Imma sleep now.

#medical procedure #medical tests #ivp #ultrasound #kidney stones #I hope I never have to drink that liquid torture for as long as I live

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angstysebfan · 3 years

Text

The Past Can Break You - 3

Pairing: Bucky x Reader

AU: Avengers

Summary: You and Bucky have been dating for aa few years. As far as you’re concerned he is the one. But what happens when a blast from the actual past shows up?

A/N: Ive seen a lot stories of Bucky getting his first love from the 40′s back. And I’ve always wondered... what would happen if he was dating someone already? Reader is from this time. Not proofread.

Warning:

Bucky tried for several hours to try and get you to open the door. You ignored him, not wanting to see him because you were so angry with him. He promised he would change and make more time for you, and then he leaves you in the middle of sex for her! Dot is his priority, as far as you’re concerned. You roll your eyes as you think about the “trauma” she had. You know she is using their past to manipulate him, and he is being stupid and letting her. Well now he must face the consequences for his actions.

You stare up at the ceiling of your old room as you again, for the millionth time, hear the knock and pleads of your boyfriend from the other side of the door. “Please, baby. Open up. I’ll let you scream at me, you can even hit me. I know I deserve it. Just let me see you, please,” he begs.

God this is getting pathetic, you thought. You sigh and figure it’s time to give him an earful and some food for thought. You walk over to the door and unlock it, before opening it to reveal Bucky looking disheveled. He still has no shirt on, just his sweats from last night.

“What could you possibly want me to say to you, Bucky? You obviously made your choice in this. You are allowing Dot to manipulate you to keep you away from me. She wants you back, and it’s completely obvious. You say you want to prioritize me, but you prioritized her! I’ve tried to be calm and understanding to what she is going though, but enough is enough!” you yell, causing Bucky to flinch.

He opens his mouth to speak but you continue, “Ever since she found out that we are dating, she has made it her sole mission to separate us. Do you even care that your actions are killing me? Do you even care that I have cried myself to sleep so many times at night that I forgot how to fall asleep without crying? Do you even care that you are shattering my heart with your actions?!” you yell as tears fall down your face.

Bucky now has tears falling as well as he takes in your words. He didn’t realize just how bad he had made the situation. He needed to fix this. He couldn’t lose you. You were the best thing that has ever happened to him, and he can’t believe that has been so stupid. He walks up and wraps his arms around you, allowing you to cry in his chest. He buries his face in your neck and cries also.

You don’t know how long you have been standing in your doorway crying, but after some time you pull away. Bucky looks at you with sad eyes, “Tell me it’s not too late for me to fix this. I-I don’t want to lose you,” he says in a raspy voice.

You sigh and look down, “I think I need some time to think about things. You need to figure out where your priorities lie. I’ll stay in here for a bit until I’m ready and then we can talk, okay?” you ask.

It breaks your heart to see the distraught nature of Bucky’s face at your words, but you need him to understand how his actions have made you feel. He nods and quickly pulls you into a hug and then slots his lips on yours in a heated kiss. When you pull away he looks you dead in the eyes, “I’m going to make this right. I am going to show you that you, and you alone are what I want and need. That you are my top priority. I promise,” he says.

As he turns and walks away, you can’t help but say, “Don’t make promises you might not be able to keep.”

Bucky stops and looks at you sadly. He really messed up. He finally turns away and walks back to your shared room, that he will now live in alone. When he closes the door he slides down to the ground and openly sobs. How could he be so stupid. How could he not see what was happening. Now he might lose the love of his life because of his past.

Dot is sitting in her room, feeling rather victorious. She overheard your argument with Bucky, and knows that now that you are separating yourself from Bucky, she will have a better chance to win him back. She sighs at the thought of having her love back with her. She was surprised that he didn’t take her back immediately, as she was his first love. Yes, ok so it was like 80 years ago, but I mean the fact that they were both together after all this time, must be fate.

Suddenly her door opens and shows the man she has been thinking about. Dot looks up and smiles, “Hey Jamie! What’s wrong?” she asks, deciding to pretend she is innocent and knows nothing. Always worked with guys. So easy.

“We need to talk, now,” Bucky says, anger evident in his voice.

Dot’s smile disappears. She figured he would be upset, but not angry, and not at her. “What’s going on?” she asks with a furrow of her brow.

“This is over, Dot. Whatever you are trying to do, it’s done. I know you are dealing with a lot, but you need to start figuring it out for yourself. I am done putting you before Y/N,” he says.

Dot can’t help but roll your eyes. “Oh is she upset with you again Jamie? I mean I understand being slightly threatened by our past, but she obviously doesn’t trust you. If she can’t trust you, then she isn’t good enough for you. Maybe it’s time for you to cut your loses and return to me,” Dot said.

“She has every reason to be upset! I’ve neglected her! I just want to know... are those panic attacks that you have even real,” he asks.

Dot feigns being offended, “How dare you! Of course they are! Look at all I have gone through! I volunteer for something back in the 40′s and wake up in 2020′s. There is a lot of thoughts and feelings I feel and I don’t know how to process them! Is she saying I am lying?”

“I am saying you are lying. You always seem fine when we are together, but the moment I go to my girlfriend you start freaking out. You are trying to keep me away from her,” Bucky says, his voice raising.

“I feel comfortable with you, Jamie! I love you! Of course I feel better when you are near! It’s not my fault you tried to move on! But tell me this, if you don’t love me like you did, and you love her, why then did you constantly leave your girl for me? You obviously are still in love with me! So dump the girl and let’s be together!” Dot yelled.

“You’re crazy! Seriously you are delusional! You use me being a good friend and a gentleman against me to separate me from the woman that I truly love. Well it stops now! You need to get your ass in gear because it will take me nothing to turn you out of the compound to fend for yourself. If Steve and I can make it work, so can you. And your trauma is nothing compared to what we have gone through. So get yourself together and figure your life out. I am done playing these games with you!” Bucky says before leaving Dot’s room.

Dot sat there stunned at the last outburst. If Bucky thinks that she will go down without a fight to the death for him, then he doesn’t know her at all. Dot always gets what Dot wants. No matter the cost.

Bucky knocked on Natasha’s door, trying to calm himself down from his conversation with Dot. Nat opened the door and immediately tried to close it, “Nat please! I need your help,” Bucky begged.

She rolled her eyes and allowed him in. He sat there and told her everything about what happened last night, and this morning with Y/N and Dot. Natasha smacked him upside the head at least 4 times for being dumb. When he was done explaining everything he looked sadly at Natasha, “So will you help me? I have a plan that will allow Y/N the time she asked to think, while also showing her that she is my priority. She is the love of my life. Please?” Bucky begged.

Nat knew how much you and Bucky loved each other. She knew how happy you both were, so she agreed to help. Bucky laid out the plan to Nat and they both agreed to set it in motion. Bucky felt better already. He told off Dot, got your best friend to help him, and now all he needed was to win you back. He hoped he wasn’t too late.

Chapter 2 / Chapter 4

Dot is trouble! What plans does he have up her sleeve? Will the reader forgive Bucky? Does he deserve it? 🤷🏻‍♀️Feedback is appreciated!

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tomdiddlyumptious · 3 years

Note

Heyyy ok but what about dad!tom finding porn on his 15yo boy’s phone and having "the talk" with him 😭😭 I live for this😌

Trying writing again, seriously guys idk whats going on with me. And im terrible at doing “the talks” so take it as it is-

warnings: ya know..porn and praying children<3...and a hint of bisexual!tom👀

Its normal, Porn. The dirty sight for anyone to see. Tom did it once, only once though. He found it pretty creepy and stalkerish that hes watching people have sex. When he was 15 and thought about sex it caused insecurity because he noticed that you HAVE to get naked. It just shivered his veins. well of course until he met you.

So when Tom and Wesley were cooking for your birthday, Tom forgot an Ingredient. “Hey- wes, can i borrow your phone?” tom struggled, his hands covered in flour as he looked at his sons phone. Wesley's eyes widened as his hands were also covered in flour, he turned, wiping his hands on the black apron before chuckling “y-yeah dad”. Tom laughed and also wiped his hands with a towel before grabbing his phone. Wes’s knees almost gave out as they shook and his body felt like it was going down a roller coaster, he jumped when his dad asked for his code. “Its my birthday” “oh- of course, it is” tom mumbled, leaning on the kitchen island as Wes got back to work, trying not to look weird as normally he would stand over his dads shoulder watching his fingers tap away in his phone, not that he did it before.

Toms eyebrows furrowed as he bit his bottom lip, wondering if he should search through his phone while he already has it, only to shrug his head no saying thats not a good thing for a father to do. He clicked on the safari tab, Wes’s phone acting slow so he reached and grabbed his glass cup thats filled with water, only to choke and have his eyes widened. “Oh shit” wes mumbled to himself. Tom didnt even look further, he slammed the phone down but both of their ears turned red when a loud pornographic moan left the womans mouth “yeah fuck my cock”. “OH MY GOD” tom yelled in his british accent, grabbing the phone and screaming when he was met with liquids shooting at the camera, he shut off the phone and placed it back on the table, Wesley's hand slapped over his mouth as he cringed intensely by the word “cock” but then soon becoming more embarrassed that his dad knows he watches….well, that. “Im gonna use the bathroom” wesley said, not looking at his dad as his cheeks shot red. “Erm….im gonna set a 15 minute timer” “DAD” wes said storming off to the bathroom. “Im gonna die” wesley muttered to himself, cursing at the lord for letting this happen as he also begged for forgiveness and asking for this not to be a big problem, just on his knees infront of the toilet, apron still dirty as he shut his eyes tight.

“God i swear if my dad leaves me alone i’ll pray EVERY night, i’ll sing- look i’ll sing this church song”

By the way, he only heard it from some where.

“Take me to the kinggg, i dont have much to bring” he didnt know anything past that so it didnt do anything in his favour, it only made tom furrow his eyebrows from the other side of the door before knocking making wes silently flinch at the holy ghost “just please- dont do this” he whispered. “I-i can hear you son” tom awkwardly smiled, “mind coming out now?” “ive only been in here for like 5 minutes” “can we just talk about it?” “i dont know if id be comfortable with that-” “or else it will be with me and your mom” “oh my god” wes stood up and did a “woo-sah” looking at himself in the mirror before turning around and hesitantly opening the door. Tom smiled and did an awkward wave “to the couch please”

“Dad i really dont wanna talk about this” wes said on the couch, touching knees with his father that was sitting right next to him. “No we have to- so be quiet and let me speak.” tom sent a look at wes making him grumble and hunch in his seat, but all ears. “Please dont watch porn, its terrible. Its addictive and its not how things work, trust me. When we made you it was pretty ugly in there-”

“DAD PLEASE” he groaned in his arms. “What! Im just letting you know! Im letting you know that when you- or you probably have but-” tom shrugged looking at him son. “Just make sure you use protection, uhm if you want me to buy you some i can- dont give me that look” “your literally talking to me about what goes around penises, what am i supposed to do, say i love you?” he groaned again. “Well its your fault! But anyway you need to make sure you get consent from her, make sure she- or HE is into it-” “oh my god” “what? I dont know your options?” “what are yours?” wes asked.

Tom smiled at his son, making wes’s mouth drop (i dont think its a secret that toms at least a LITTLE fruity) “anyways. Girls have three holes, ones for the pee and the others for the- pp. And the other one is for the other one. I dont think your ready for anal yet” tom gripped his sons knee. “Youve done-” “you ARENT ready for that talk” tom but him off. “But you need to make sure that the woman is lubricated enough because if she isnt it will be TOO tight and un-pleasurable for the both of you. If shes” he raised his fingers doing the quote on quote “loose, that means shes lubricated, dont listen to these assholes shaming girls for something they cannot control” he rolled his eyes, wes thinking about anything to drift off into space but very stuck. “Dont be nervous asking for help trying to find the hole, although it should be located right on top of her- ya know” tom too immature to say the word, something he cant say although he said only a few words ago. “But yes, make sure you wrap it! Im serious, i dont need more children” tom ordered. “Im the single child” “your also annoying” wes sarcastically smiled at his dad by his words. “Her clitoris is that- bean, yeah lets call it a bean” “you call a clitoris a bean?” “oh no, i give it a name more...boujee, but thats between me and your mom” “PLEASE STOP REMINDING ME THAT YOU AND MOM HAVE SEX” wes shouted while stuffing his head into a pillow. “What its normal! You were watching it!” wes grunted “my life is over” “oh it hasnt even began” “DAD” “im just sayin!-”

The boys heard the keys jiggle from the door before hearing a loud “hii!” “we are in the living room babe!” tom said, wes panicking more as he heard th door shut and lock before seeing his mom coming over. “What are you guys talking about?” tom looked at wes and wes silently pleaded for him not to say anything, but being the div he is “sex talk!” he threw his hands up. “Ohh! How fun, have you told him about the movements yet?” “PLEASE NO-”

#dad!tom holland #dad!tom #tom holland #tom holland x reader #mob!tom holland #tom holland au #tom holland smut #tom holland fluff #tom holland angst #tom holland imagine #tom holland blurb #tom holland x black!reader #tom holland x you #tom holland x pregnant!reader

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daringyounggrayson · 3 years

Text

misplaced guilt

(Read below or on AO3)

It’s been a while since Bruce has been to one of these galas, and for once, he is neither hosting nor making a speech. It’s a nice change, to say the least.

Dick is sitting next to him, kicking his legs under the table. Bruce would tell him to stop, but at least he’s actually using the chair as intended with both feet closer to the floor than the chair, so Bruce lets it go for the moment. If it gets too out of control, he can always reach out and stop him, but for now, he’ll let the kid release some pent-up energy.

Bruce keeps half of his attention on Dick and the other half on his conversation with Jasmine Owen, a woman who works at one of Gotham’s youth centers. Bruce knew from the second she introduced herself that she came over in hopes of getting a donation, but he doesn’t mind; that’s one of the main purposes of these things, and Bruce is happy to help however he can.

“Babs,” Dick gasps excitedly, shooting upright when he catches Barbara walk into the room, Commissioner Gordon by her side. Bruce looks over at Dick, quirking an eyebrow. Dick smiles back, asks in his I’m-in-public-so-I’m-behaving-like-an-angel voice, “May I please be excused?”

“Hnn,” Bruce says, pretending to think over his answer.

“Bruce,” Dick whines.

Bruce smiles. “Alright. But stay in the ballroom. Dinner is going to be served soon.”

“Okay, thanks!” he slides out of his chair and offers a wave. “Nice meeting you, Ms. Owen.”

“And you, Richard,” she smiles back. When he’s gone, she turns to Bruce again and says, “He’s a sweet kid.”

Bruce can’t help but think at least in public, and at least to people who aren’t me. He’s half-joking, but there’s some truth to the statement: Dick has always seemed to behave better for Alfred, and he’s nothing if not an angel around strangers, even when he’s mad at Bruce.

At home, it’s not that Dick isn’t a good kid—he is—but he’s still a kid. Dick can be sassy, and he has a taste for anything that will make Bruce’s hair turn gray (usually dangerous, usually far away from the ground). He also has no qualms about making fun of Bruce when Dick feels it’s called for. Then there are the arguments, the borderline tantrums. Both have been decreasing in frequency, and Bruce attributes most of them to processing and coming to terms with his parents’ murder, but they are—difficult, to say the least. Dick will have these rough days—sometimes rough weeks—where he’ll lash out at Bruce over the smallest things. Sometimes it seems like he yells at Bruce just to put his hurt somewhere.

Bruce tries to take all of it—from the jokes at his expense that even he has to admit are funny, to the meltdowns—as a good sign, one that says Dick feels secure and knows that Bruce will love him regardless of his behavior or attitude. But there are certainly days when Bruce thinks it would be nice if Dick would listen to him like he listens to Alfred—like when Bruce tells him to get off of the unstable shed roof, for example.

Despite the challenges that come with raising a child, there are also so many blessings. There’s no other word to describe it. Seeing Dick learn and grow and thrive is something Bruce will never get tired of. On top of that, Dick is just this brilliant, funny, and kind child. He has the biggest heart Bruce has ever seen, and he cares so deeply and widely. Bruce doesn’t know how he got so lucky. Dick is Bruce’s light, his whole world.

Bruce pulls himself out of his head, says, “He’s the best thing that has ever happened to me.” It’s something he can say with complete honesty. “Do you have kids?”

“Oh god, no. I think I’m still a little young for that,” she laughs. Then, thinking about what she said, her face falls. “Not that you were too young, just for me, I’d rather—”

“No, no, it’s fine.” He puts his hands up and smiles. “I was really young when I took Dick in. I go to parent-teacher conferences, and most of the other parents are at least ten years older than me. But I like to think I’m doing alright, and Dick’s happy, so that’s all that matters.”

“Yes, I suppose.” She smiles, but looks down at the table.

“So, what’s it like day-to-day at the youth center?”

She looks up, coming alive again, and the conversation picks back up.

oOo

After dinner, Dick and Barbara disappear again, and Bruce is left alone to mingle. Most people come to him, but he only has to escape a few times, so it’s going about as good as these things can go.

That is until a very urgent Barbara runs into him and tugs on his arm. “Sorry everyone, but I need to borrow Brucie for a second.”

Bruce ducks down to look Barbara in the eye. “What is it?”

“Dick. Just come with me.”

He follows her without another word to the group of people he was talking to. She leads him into the hall and toward the lobby. When they turn the corner, Dick is on the ground in a lateral recumbent position. Gordon is talking to him gently, though Dick seems unresponsive.

“Dick.” Bruce lurches forward, falling to his knees and reaching out to find Dick’s pulse and check his breathing. “What happened?”

“Barbara thinks he had a seizure,” Gordon answers. “An ambulance will be here soon.”

Dick’s breath hitches and he lets out a low moan that feels like a twisting dagger in Bruce’s chest. His eyes find Bruce’s, and he unwraps one hand from his stomach to reach for Bruce’s. Bruce takes it, squeezing it gently in a reassuring manner.

“I’m right here,” Bruce promises, running a hand through Dick’s hair.

“It hurts,” Dick gasps.

“Shh, the paramedics are going to be here soon. We’ll fix it.”

Dick shakes his head and squeezes his eyes shut. “I don’t feel right.”

Bruce tightens his grip slightly, hoping to keep Dick conscious. “What’s wrong? Where does it hurt?”

“Head, stomach,” Dick mumbles. “Feel hot, an’ dizzy.”

Bruce frowns, trying to determine what could be causing Dick’s symptoms. Is this the beginning of an illness, or a seizure disorder? Has Dick been poisoned? There was a run-in with Scarecrow a few nights ago, and Dick had needed to take an untested antidote for the fear toxin. Could this be a delayed reaction to the concoction Bruce had come up with?

Dick’s grip loosens.

“Dick?” Bruce calls urgently. “Dick!”

He gets no response.

oOo

Dick is staring at a white ceiling when he realizes he’s awake. Sunlight is streaming in through a giant window on his right, and there’s a framed painting of giraffes across from him. He’s tired and confused, and his gut tells him that something is wrong, that something bad happened. His first thought is that he wants his mom.

He turns his head to the left, finding Bruce in a chair and holding his hand.

“Hi,” Dick says, slowly pushing himself into a sitting position. Bruce grunts some kind of greeting and raises Dick’s bed while Dick takes in the medical bracelets on his wrist—one ID bracelet and one that indicates that he’s a fall risk—and the IV in the back of his hand. “What happened?”

Bruce shifts in his chair, face serious. “We were at the gala. You were poisoned.”

Dick matches Bruce’s expression, trying to think. He remembers being with Babs, telling her that something was wrong. Then he’d been on the ground, and there’d been sirens.

“The man who poisoned you had planned to offer me the antidote for a price, but he didn’t realize that you would react to the poison so—so severely,” Bruce explains, rubbing his thumb over Dick’s knuckles. “He was working as one of the waiters and heard the commotion. He came forward shortly after the ambulance left and he’s currently in custody.”

Dick swallows. “Why did he . . .” Why did he poison Dick in the first place? Need money so badly? Feel that poisoning Dick was the only option? “Would it have killed me? If he didn’t give us the antidote.”

Bruce, like always, is honest with Dick. “The doctors were able to stabilize you, but they needed to neutralize the poison quickly, and the antidote did that. It’s hard to say what would have happened without it, but things were touch and go for a while.”

Dick nods, not sure what to say as he takes it in. Eventually, he asks, “How long have I been out?”

“A few days. You woke up a few times yesterday, but you were incoherent,” Bruce says.

Dick wracks his brain, trying to pull up some inaccessible memory.

“I’m sorry that this happened, Dick.”

Dick squeezes Bruce’s hand. “Not your fault.”

“Hnn.”

“What? Are you seriously guilty that you didn’t taste all of my food first or something? ‘Cause that’s nuts, B.”

Bruce says, “You are my child. I am allowed to feel guilty when I fail to protect you.”

“You didn’t fail,” Dick interjects. “I’m okay—really.”

Bruce’s face is still pinched and concerned, and he’s looking at Dick like he might fall apart. Dick leans toward him and stretches his arms out, and Bruce quickly pulls him into a tight hug.

“I’m not going anywhere, Bruce,” Dick promises. And even to himself, it doesn’t sound like a reassurance most nine-year-olds should be giving. But it fits with his new life, he supposes. “I’m okay.”

Bruce tucks Dick’s head under his chin, says, “I was . . . I’m glad that you’re alright.”

Dick nods into Bruce’s chest and lets himself be held for another moment. It’s not the hug from his mom that he woke up wanting, but it’s close. It makes him feel safe and reminds him of home, and maybe that’s all Dick needs.

#dick grayson #bruce wayne #nightwing #batman #batfamily #tw: seizure #elizabeth writes

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alj4890 · 3 years

Note

I got an ask we know Riley gets kidnapped by Anton but what if Anton was in love with her and he didn’t wanna kill her but makes her his. What if Olivia killed Claudus for shooting drake.

I love the way you think, Nonny! I actually would have eaten this up with a spoon if that had happened in canon. To be honest, I really liked Justin in book 2. If he had been a new love interest, I would have done a play through just to see what happens if Riley chose him 🤦🏻 Of course then we find out he is behind all the bombings and such so...oops, LOL. When I first saw your request, I made an aesthetic with just Justin/Anton and Riley in mind. I completely forgot to add a definite OTP of mine, Drake and Olivia, to it. Smh. The story though will definitely include them along with Riley and Justin. I am so tempted to turn this into a series 🙊

@gkittylove99 @krsnlove @kingliam2019 @texaskitten30 @yourmajesty09 @mom2000aggie @ofpixelsandscribbles @twinkleallnight @lodberg @amandablink @neotericthemis @mm2305 @sfb123 @iufilms

Masterlist

True Intentions

It had happened when he had not been paying attention. It shouldn't have happened at all. He had one goal. One mission. Nothing had ever come to mean more to him than that. Nothing. No one.

Until Riley.

He knew he shouldn't have spent so much time with her. He shouldn't have helped Maxwell in picking the right dresses for her. He shouldn't have stuck around to see her come out of dressing rooms, an excited smile upon her face, as she twirled around for them to give their opinions.

It had taken all his will power to keep from telling her what he truly thought. Riley's beauty was simply stunning, not because of her outer loveliness, but more that he saw her inner beauty shining through each trial she faced. Her strength amazed him. Her wit brought a smile to his face. Her kindness touched his heart.

It made him begin to long for things he shouldn't. They shouldn't be a part of any dream or plan he had.

And yet...she was beginning to crop up in his thoughts. In his dreams.

In his plans.

He winced as he tried to get comfortable.

His plans hadn't exactly gone as he had hoped. In fact, he should have talked to his men and explained that Riley was not to be a target.

Thank God for Drake. If he hadn't jumped in front of her, she would have been taken from me.

His lips twisted in another painful grimace.

"Are you in pain?"

Justin looked up and tried to smile. "Just a little."

His nurse shook her head. "I told you to buzz before it got too bad." She gently checked his wound.

"I don't want to be a bother." He mumbled.

"You aren't." She patted his hand. "You aren't any trouble at all." Her nose wrinkled. "We had a few nobles cause unnecessary problems when the attack happened."

"Really?"

She rolled her eyes. "Some were knocked down during the chaos and demanded they be admitted."

He chuckled softly. "Sounds like something they would do."

"It's a shame that good people like you were seriously hurt while those spoiled nobles try and take all the attention." She readjusted his covers after administering some more pain medication in his IV. "I don't know why King Liam is so hellbent on bringing them back to court."

"What do you mean?" Justin tried to fight the effects of the pain medicine. "What's he doing?"

"He and Lady Riley are going on some type of tour to some of the major houses to personally invite them to their wedding."

His brow furrowed.

A unity tour. That would work on these small minded individuals. It was a smart move. The public were already Team Riam. Once the royal couple convinced the most powerful houses to come to their wedding, all the other minor lords and ladies would follow suit.

"Well played, Liam." Justin's eyes drooped closed. "Well played."

**************

He couldn't believe that they not only convinced Madeleine's entire family, but also somehow got all of Portavira on their side.

"What's the plan?" Claudius asked.

"We need something big to remind everyone that we aren't a one trick pony." Justin told him.

He looked out the window. Leaves were beginning to change with the first hints of autumn in the air.

A hint of a smile appeared as a plan began to form.

"It would be a shame if Cordonia's apple orchard had a bad year, wouldn't it?" He eyed his second in command.

Claudius chuckled. "It really would."

******************

Justin watched as every channel showed the devastation of the orchard near Applewood. He couldn't help but smile over Riley making the people love her even more for her righteous anger. Her promises to bring those responsible to justice along with making the orchard bigger than before made him nearly burst with pride.

She had grown into her role more so than he had ever imagined. Gone was the timid young waitress from New York who uttered no comment when reporters surrounded her. She was a confident woman now who could think on her feet.

Justin thought she was more attractive than the first time he had seen her floundering in front of the cameras, in desperate need of a hero. It hadn't been a bother to rush to her side then and put his arm around her. Her wide eyes had lifted to his and he had nearly melted from her beauty.

He still couldn't believe that she forgave Liam for choosing another over her. Granted Madeleine impressed him with how she could manipulate reporters into spinning a story to her advantage, but Riley was so many things that the cold countess was not. She deserved better than what she got.

And he planned on giving it to her.

*****************

A week after the orchard burning, he turned to see the one rarely far from his thoughts.

"Justin!" Riley rushed over to engulf him in a hug.

"How's my favorite media darling?" He asked.

She leaned back and gave him that smile that was brighter than flash bulbs. "Much better now that I know you're recovering." She playfully glanced about before whispering, "Save me from Madeleine!"

He laughed as he hugged her once more. "I don't know. I've seen her work and can't find fault with it."

Riley pouted. She linked her arm with his as they walked down the hospital hallway. "I prefer your guidance to hers." Her nose wrinkled. "It's weird being told how to act by Liam's former fiancée. I know there wasn't anything between them, but still."

Justin patted her hand. "Tell you what. If Madeleine is unable to do her job or you decide to fire her, then I will gladly step back into my old position." He dug around in his pocket for the earpiece she had used during Liam's engagement tour.

Her smile reappeared. "Old faithful."

"I'm always Just-in-time." He teased.

*****************

It had been too close. He hadn't expected Riley to go anywhere near Constantine. And there she was, by Liam's side, graciously accepting some necklace from the old man who had destroyed her initial happily ever after.

His heart had nearly stopped as he watched rubble fall around them. Riley had frozen in fear over Liam's safety. It was a nightmare come to life as pieces of the wall and ceiling began to collapse.

At least one good thing had come from this: one king was dead.

It sadly wasn't the king he needed to die.

Justin began to plan how he would comfort Riley once Liam was gone. He wouldn't have to tell her it was he, himself, who orchestrated his death. But he would make certain to enjoy the benefits of it.

His eyes narrowed over another slight problem he had.

He was going to have to kill his own wife too.

******************

Lythikos...

It had been almost too easy. Madeleine was already in need of a distraction after hearing Liam gush over how excited he was to marry Riley in a few weeks. Once she requested a fruity cocktail, he knew then that the poison could go undetected taste wise.

The bartender left to go replenish the champagne. Madeleine's irritation over having to wait on a refill was drawing attention.

"Here." He grinned at her. "Allow me to make you another."

Her eyes widened. "Aren't you that press secretary that helped Riley?"

"I am." He began to mix a strong cocktail for her while adding the poison, all right under her nose. "And I must say you are the best I've ever seen."

Madeleine's irritation disappeared over the compliment. "I am, aren't I?"

"Riley's lucky to have someone so knowledgeable in ways of both the court and public like you." He added.

"Yes, she is." Madeleine muttered. "I'll do anything for my country, even if it is a thankless job."

"You should be recognized for your sacrifice." Justin handed her the deadly drink.

"Yes, I should." She took a gulp.

"How is it?" He asked.

"It's the only good thing here." A tipsy grin appeared on her face when she saw Riley. She grasped Justin's hand and pulled him in her wake. "Let's go say, hi."

"Boooooo!" Madeleine giggled when Riley turned around. "It's the ghosts of press secretary past and present."

"The what now?" Riley lips trembled with suppressed laughter as she looked up at Justin for clarification.

"I'm the ghost of press secretary past." He winked at her.

"OoooOooo!" Madeleine swayed where she stood.

"Whoa, there." Riley tried to steady her. "You okay?"

"She's had a little too much." Justin mimed drinking.

"It's a party!" Madeleine slurred. "It's in the worst place ever but it's a party and I'm going to...going to..."

"Enjoy it?" Riley offered.

"Extractly!" Madeleine's brow wrinkled over that not being the right word. "Expactly?"

"Exactly." Justin corrected.

"That."

The crowd quieted around them when Olivia took the stage to offer a final toast of the evening to Liam and Riley's wedding.

"Woo!" Madeleine cheered.

Riley and Justin tried to shush her.

Her giddy smile fell as her rosy cheeks drained of color. "Somefing's not..."

"Madeleine?" Riley lost her grip on her when she swayed violently to the right. "What's--"

Madeleine hit a table, causing the plates to clatter and the vase of blood red roses to fall over.

"I hate this place." She collapsed on the floor.

"Madeleine!" Riley dropped to her knees and tried to bring her to. "Liam! Mara! Come quick!"

Justin stepped back as the two came to see what was wrong. He watched as Olivia made her way through the crowd to find out what the all the fuss was about.

"What's wrong with her?" Riley asked.

"She's been poisoned." Mara whispered.

*******************

Justin loved seeing the delighted surprise once more on Riley's face when he said he would take over Madeleine's duties for the rest of the tour. It would have been a perfect moment if Liam had not been standing there. He was ashamed to think of his nearly giving himself away when he panicked at the sight of Olivia walking in behind him.

He wished Lucretia would quit trying to push Olivia into going into the family vault. She had a sick sense of humor in wanting her niece to discover she was already married. For some reason, she did not approve of the way her niece depended on her friends for support.

Justin knew the power friends could have. Had he not been trained by his own parents' friends, he wouldn't be the worthy man next in line to the throne. His comradery with his own men inspired their loyalty and willingness to die to make him king.

He needed to distance himself from Lucretia the moment they got out of Lythikos.

****************

She was supposed to come alone! Why did she bring Riley? I can't kill her. I need her. I deserve to have a choice in the one I want ruling by my side. The people already adore her, much more so than they admire Olivia. I was supposed to become free of this marriage. Once she and Liam are dead, I'll be able to be king and have--

"Justin?" Riley's eyes were clouded with confusion as she looked first at a picture of him dressed in a royal uniform. "What is this?"

"I'm sorry, Riley." His voice cracked on her name.

Justin reached in his pocket and pulled out a revolver.

Lucretia cackled with glee as she told her niece the truth about her marriage.

Justin stood there silently as the woman he loved shook her head in denial.

She's so incredibly sweet to doubt a friend could be the bad guy. I hate that I can't pull her away from all this and simply explain why I should be the ruler of Cordonia. I deserve it. I worked for it. My entire life was made for me to take the crown. She would be able to understand that. Look how far she's come in her own life. Who could imagine a waitress from some dive bar in America would come to be the next queen of a small European nation?

"Do it already!" Lucretia hissed. "Shoot her!"

He couldn't do it. Even as he held the gun steady, pointed directly at the woman he loved's heart, he couldn't shoot Riley.

"Get away from her!" Liam ordered.

Justin spun around to see the king and guards filling up the narrow passageway.

"I thought you said this was secure." Justin snapped at Lucretia.

"It was." She held her hands up in surrender.

Justin watched as she stepped forward, pretending to stumble.

His eyes widened as once again his love was trapped within a collapsing room.

He managed to see her safely end up in Liam's arms before escaping through a hidden passage.

He left Lucretia to the guards. She had served her purpose and was sadly of no use to him any longer. Now he could plan what he truly wanted to happen.

*******************

Liam and Riley's wedding day...

"I don't care who you kill. Olivia and Riley are to be taken alive." Justin told the small team of men he was sending in. "If you have to wound them to get them here, make certain Riley's is non life threatening.

He ignored the questioning look Claudius sent his way.

"Bring them both to our stronghold." His eyes narrowed. "Do not fail me."

****************

Later that night...

"Good work." Justin straightened his jacket. He wanted to look his best when he saw Riley again.

Claudius smirked at him. "Just think of all the men we would still have if you had let me go alone."

Justin chuckled. "True, but at least we are free of our weakest links." He smoothed his hair back. "Now take me to our guests."

***************

"I know the real Justin is somewhere in there." Riley leaned as far forward as her bindings allowed. "You helped me gain the love of the people. You know that if you kill me, the people will not readily accept you as king."

He couldn't help but smile. "I know and that is why I don't intend to hurt you."

"Then why kidnap us?" Olivia demanded.

He turned toward her. "If I'm to be king, then I have to take the necessary steps to claim the throne." He motioned for Claudius to come in.

"You're the one who shot Drake!" Olivia shouted, struggling against the ropes biting into her tender skin. "You'll regret that."

"And you tried to kill me!" Riley added, narrowing her eyes.

"That was a mistake." Justin quickly said. "You were never to be harmed."

"Then why all the attempts?" She asked. "Why do you persist in--"

"You weren't supposed to be here, Riley." He knelt down in front of her. "You should have stayed in New York until the time was right"

Her eyebrows drew together. "What are you talking about.

Justin asked Claudius to remain with Olivia while he took Riley somewhere private.

"If you think for one second that I will remain with this man while you take her away go do only God knows what," Olivia's chair creaked at her straining to break free, "then you don't know what a Nevarkis is truly made of!"

Justine rolled his eyes over her rant as he untied Riley from her chair. He kept her ankles and wrists bound together. He swept her into his arms and carried her out.

Olivia's shouts were silenced by the sound of a hard slap.

Riley struggled in Justin's arms. "What did he do to her? OLIVIA?!" Tears streamed down her cheeks. "Justin, please don't--"

"Nothing's happened to her." He took her into a surprisingly clean, yet drab, sitting room.

Riley was dropped on a chaise lounge. She eyed the door then Justin.

"I'm not going to hurt you." He repeated. He gently cupped her cheek, fingers brushing along her jaw line. "I love you too much to ever harm you."

Riley stilled. She looked up at him. "You what?"

He knelt before her. "I'm in love with you. It didn't hit me until you told me you had accepted Liam's proposal on the train. I didn't plan it, but I refuse to hide my feelings any longer." He smiled at her. "You've proven yourself as the rightful Queen of Cordonia. Once Liam and Olivia are dead, you and I can rule this country as we see fit. We'll--"

Riley shook her head. "Justin," she believed he was deranged and knew she had to handle this carefully, "I'm flattered. Really I am. I mean, we both know I would never have gotten this far without you."

His smile grew at her realizing she owed him for her meteoric rise within the court.

"But if you kill Liam and Olivia, the people will not feel any love or loyalty for you." She tilted her head as she studied him. "Surely you see the problem with this plan."

"People respect power." He explained. "They respect someone who fights for what is rightfully his. Since my birth, I have been meant for something greater. My parents, Olivia's family, even my soldiers realized that I alone am worthy to rule over this country." He focused once more upon her. "And I've seen that you are the one to do so by my side."

Riley shook her head. "Justin, I am honored," her voice cracked on that lie, "to have your love but I can't accept it." Her eyes filled with tears. "I'm in love with Liam."

"Riley, he didn't choose you." Justin argued. "He left you on your own to fight against nobles, the press, even his own father. You deserve so much more than being an afterthought."

Tears slipped down her cheeks once more. "That wasn't what he did. He was trying to protect me. And I--"

He leaned down and kissed her.

She froze at the touch, refusing to participate.

"Once Liam's gone, you will see the truth." Justin promised.

"I won't." Her eyes narrowed. "As long as I live, I'll hate you with everything within me for taking him from me."

"You don't have it in you." He shook his head in amusement. "You've forgiven everyone. Olivia, Penelope, Madeleine, even Constantine. You never hold a grudge."

"You'll be my first." Riley vowed. "Liam is the love of my life. If you ruin my chance to finally be with him, I will never forgive you. As long as there is breath in my body, I will find a way to destroy you."

"You are amazing." He murmured, knowing she was speaking from her heart. He couldn't wait for that devotion to be for himself.

"Anton?"

The two turned to see Claudius in the doorway. "Liam should be here any moment."

Justin nodded and told him he would meet him and the rest of the men downstairs.

He lifted Riley in his arms and placed her back in the cell with Olivia.

His wife had the bruised imprint of Claudius's hand on her alabaster cheek. Blood had dried on her bottom lip. No tears had fallen from the force of the hit. Her left eye was bloodshot as she glared up at him.

"Liv?" Riley choked out. "Are you--"

"I'm fine." Her harsh answer echoed in the chamber. "It will take more than some two bit thug to hurt me." Her eyes did a quick scan to make certain Riley wasn't hurt.

"If you will excuse me, I have to go prepare for Liam's last night on earth." He retied Riley to her chair.

She threw her head back with all her might to connect with his face.

His glasses broke from the force of her strike. Blood poured out his nose as he stumbled away from her.

"Don't ever," his voice dropped to a hiss, "do that again, my love." He gripped her chin and jerked her face up toward his. "You will learn how to behave soon enough."

He slammed the cell door and left them alone.

"Did he hurt you?" Olivia whispered.

"No." Riley bit her bottom lip. "Not yet."

*****************

"Where is my wife?" Liam demanded.

Justin couldn't help but be impressed. The young king was standing before him, completely outnumbered, yet didn't show the slightest flicker of fear.

He asked the one question that he himself would have asked if Riley was taken from him.

"She is well." Justin replied. "Which is something I can't promise about your own well being."

"I want to see her." Liam bit out. "Now!"

Justin's chuckle was interrupted by a hastily whispered message from Claudius. His head jerked around to search the dim hallway as if doing so would reveal the missing prisoners.

How had they escaped?

"You don't get to make demands here." He snapped at Liam.

"Let Riley and Olivia go." Liam ordered. "And I will take their place." His eyes narrowed. "I know it is a temporary one."

Justin couldn't help but smile. The man was indeed brave to trade his life for Riley and Olivia's.

"No!" Riley screamed out from the stairs.

Chaos broke out as she led the charge to attack the Sons of the Earth. Justin watched as she ran over to protect Liam's back.

The couple were doing their utmost to protect the other from harm.

Their friends were taking his well trained soldiers out one by one. It was embarrassing to see how pitiful his men fought.

Olivia moved into his line of sight. Fury blazed across her delicate features.

"I'm impressed." He told her, unsheathing his sword. "I should have searched you myself."

"Trust me." Olivia circled him. "It will be the last mistake you'll ever make!"

She lunged at him. He easily parried her attack. "I think you've forgotten that it was your parents who gave me the same training you had."

"I think you talk too much!" She twirled about, bringing her daggers up to stop his sword from meeting her shoulder. He grunted from her heel piercing his leg as she pushed off to break his hold.

They continued to try and deliver punishing blows to the other. She was desperate to kill the man who was after her friends and country. He was anxious to be free of their marriage.

He noticed from the corner of his eye Claudius and Drake fighting. His second in command stunned the commoner with an uppercut to his jaw, causing Drake to stumble back into a wall.

Olivia heard the scuffle and followed Justin's line of sight. Her face paled at Claudius moving towards Drake to end him once and for all.

With a flick of her wrists she not only slashed Justin but threw her other dagger at Claudius. It struck true along the side of his neck, cutting into his jugular. He let out a garbled scream as he fell to the floor.

Justin hissed at the deep gash she had made along his ribcage.

Seeing that it was a lost battle, he hopped the banister and began to rush upstairs. He would have to go into hiding once more before orchestrating another attack.

"This ends now!" Riley yelled out at him.

He spun around to see both her and Liam rushing toward him. He raised his sword, determined to put an end to the man who stood between him and the throne. He hesitated when Riley jumped in front of her husband.

"You're not taking him from me!" She raised her battle ax. "Every time you try, I will stop you."

Does Liam know how lucky he is? She waited on him to choose her. Twice! And now she stands here, ready to defend him to the death. How could any man not fall in love with Riley?

His refusal to fight her was his downfall. He was pushed over the banister by the royal couple. While his breath was knocked out, Maxwell and Hana bound his hands together behind his back.

He looked about at his fallen and captured comrades. His attention was drawn toward Olivia and Drake. The pair were covered in blood and bruises, yet they were leaning against each other. Drake had his arm around her while softly speaking. Whatever was said caused Olivia to press even closer to his side. Her arms slipped around his waist. Her eyes were closed tight as she allowed him to hold her.

Justin had suspected something more between the pair. It looked like his coup for the throne had accomplished something for them.

Bastien and the rest of the King's Guards rushed in. After talking to the king and new queen, he collected Justin and hauled him outside.

On the way, Justin met Riley's eyes.

There were so many things he wanted to explain to her. He believed she would have been on board with his plans for the kingdom. Once he had killed Liam and Olivia, he would be the benevolent king the country needed. Gone would be the purpose for pompous nobles. He would have established a council of Cordonia's citizens from all walks of life to advise him. People would be rewarded and honored for their service instead of simply being born to the right parents.

And she would have been his queen, guiding and protecting all she deemed worthy.

"Riley, I..."

"You will never ever hurt those I love again." She hissed.

"Take him away." Liam ordered, keeping his arms locked around his wife. "He will be dealt with in the morning."

Justin knew then that it was pointless to try and explain. She would never give him a chance after all that had occurred.

For the first time in his life, he realized that his intentions didn't matter to the one he loved most.

#the royal romance #trr #choices #trr liam #liam x riley #drake x olivia #justin x riley #choices the royal romance

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animereaderinsertwriter · 3 years

Text

Cupbearer (Eren/Reader)

Part III

Part I

Part II

Part IV (in progress)

Warnings: MINORS DO NOT INTERACT (im watching you, if you see this, begone!), vampire!eren, hunter!reader, fem!reader, smut, some amount of predator/prey dynamics but only kinda?? there is also a significant age difference but only cos eren is immortal and all that jazz. we're all adults here. there will eventually be smut.... and do i really need to say that there's gonna be blood in a vampire fic?

Description: A story of falling in love in 4 parts.

Eren is a bad man (well, a bad Creature) who has done bad things. When he meets the great-great-great granddaughter of one of his former friends in his favorite blood bar, however, he thinks it might not matter so much what happened in the past, so long as he can make the future something worth living to see.

Ao3 link here

After that night, it became increasingly hard for (Y/N) to leave, and for Eren to let her do so.

Something between them had changed. There were moments— when Eren would press feather-light kisses against her forehead, when he would casually leave a cup of her favorite tea where she would find it— where (Y/N) felt as though her heart might burst. It was all the little things that baffled her, all the ways in which he seemed to understand exactly how she felt; it was as though he knew her more than she knew herself. On the mornings that she would wake in his bed, sleepy and sticky and wholly content, (Y/N) wondered what it would be like to have this life forever.

Other days— on days like today— she was reminded exactly why that could never be, and it broke her heart.

Today, they had planned a romantic dinner in the park, an evening under the stars. It was supposed to be something special, a little getaway just for the two of them; they had wanted to leave as soon as (Y/N) was relieved from her patrol, so Eren had moved her things to his place, hoping that they could leave together from there for their evening alone.

In and of itself, that was fine… but when (Y/N) came in, covered head-to-toe in viscous Creature blood, Eren was furious.

“And you call me a monster,” he growled, looking her up and down with hate in his eyes. “I can’t believe you.”

He stood from his seat on the sofa, and (Y/N) began to back away, still wary from the fight she had narrowly escaped from unscathed. Her every instinct told her that she should run, fire a round of silver bullets into his chest, but she steeled herself, doing neither.

“It’s not my fault— they were attacking a civilian,” she told him as he stalked towards her, his face twisted into a horrific scowl. “I tried to stop them— tried to find out what was going on— but then they came at me with their claws, and I was left with no choice.”

“There is always a choice,” he snarled, and it was then that anger filled (Y/N) from the soles of her feet to the crown of her head. "They were probably terrified of you— how could you possibly blame them for lashing out?"

(Y/N) grit her teeth.

“This, from the man who thought genocide was his only option to the same problem?”

Eren made a low, warning sound in the back of his throat, but (Y/N) pressed on.

“You would rather me have died?” she demanded, stepping into his space. “Would it have pleased you more for my body to bleed out on the pavement, ripped to shreds by an aggressive werewolf? Would you even care, or would you just find the next blood bag and move on with your life?”

“Maybe so,” he shot back, “Then I wouldn’t have to deal with your insufferable mouth.”

That stung— but if there was one thing (Y/N) knew how to do, it was to strike back twice as hard as she had been struck.

“Fine then,” she said, turning on her heel. “I won’t bother you any longer. I’ll go out and find someone who actually wants my company, someone who’ll fuck me good and proper over the counter at some hole-in-the-wall bar over on Easy Street, someone younger, with a nicer cock and less fucking baggage— ”

She didn’t get to finish the sentence, or even walk a single step further— Eren grabbed her by the hair and pulled her to him, his fist painfully tight against her scalp.

“Wanna say that again, to my face?” he asked, tilting her head back.

“I’ll go find someone else to fuck me,” she spat, struggling in vain against him. “I’ll spread my legs for the next available schmuck in the closest bar I can find, so you can hear me scream his name and not yours.”

It was a low blow, to threaten a vampire’s claim on something they had previously assumed had belonged to them, but (Y/N) didn’t care. She had almost died today, and she’d be damned if she was going to take shit from anyone about what she had to do to survive. If Eren wanted a fight, she would damn sure give him one.

“Like hell you will,” he told her, pulling her head back so that she had to strain to remain standing. “You’re mine. Flesh of my flesh, blood of my blood— you are my Companion.”

"I belong to no one!"

Those words ripped from her throat and echoed throughout the empty house, and it was then that Eren stopped, looking at her with calculation in his gaze.

"You're right," he said, releasing her hair. "No mortal can serve two masters, lest they love one and despise the other; an archaic religious concept, but an accurate one nonetheless. You've made it abundantly clear where your loyalty lies. I was a fool for thinking otherwise."

(Y/N) began to tremble. "Eren, what are you saying?"

"I release you from our pact," he replied coldly, his eyes so dull and lifeless that it sent a chill down her spine. "No longer are you bound to be my wine-press— I free you from me."

"Eren—"

"Go," he commanded, and (Y/N) felt terribly, horribly empty.

Once, he would have told her to come freely, go safely, and leave something of the happiness she brought him; now, he gave her a cold dismissal, and it frightened her more than she was willing to admit. Still, she went, feeling hollow and used, and she didn't bother to shut the door behind her as she turned to walk home, weary from the day and sick from fighting.

***

Armin had lived for a very long time, but even so, he had yet to meet anyone so foul of temper as Eren when the Hunger was on him.

"Eren, you have to feed."

The vampire, as ill in health as in temper, glared weakly at him. "I'm not hungry."

"But you are Hungry, and don't pretend like you don't know what I'm talking about. Look, if this is about that girl—"

"I told you not to speak of her!"

Ah, so it was about her. By the looks of him, it had been two weeks since Eren had fed; Armin would bet that he hadn't seen her in the same amount of time.

"If I need to, I'll drag her here to make up with you myself," said Armin testily, "I refuse to watch my best friend starve himself because he refuses to feed on anyone else."

"You will not touch her."

Armin rolled his eyes, but didn't say anything further. He just patted Eren's arm in farewell and set about finding the little lady who was the root cause of his current consternation.

It took longer than Armin had anticipated to find the young woman who had, for all intents and purposes, completely unraveled Eren's composure; her scent, while thick and memorable in Eren's apartment, was hard to track otherwise. Armin spent two hours just wandering the city while trying to catch a breath of it here or there, and when he finally did manage to catch a whiff of her scent and follow it to her, he understood exactly why it had been so hard to track her down.

The girl was a Hunter, of all things.

When Armin found her, she was knee-deep in sewage, her knife embedded to the hilt in the skull of what appeared to be some species of winged reptile. Armin, having been a tad desperate and not actually having been expecting to find anything when he lifted the lid to the man-hole on 32nd and Main, was surprised to say the least— and when (Y/N) ripped her knife free and readjusted her stance into a defensive one directed at him, his surprise turned to intrigue.

“Er, hello there,” he said, scratching the back of his head. “I don’t suppose you’ll take my word for it that I just want to chat, will you?”

Curiously, the words gave the woman pause. She relaxed her stance ever-so-slightly, and then her eyes lit up with recognition.

“Armin Arlert?” she queried, craning her neck up to see him. “Is that you?”

This one grows curiouser and curiouser, he thought, but responded affirmatively.

“Can you give me a bit, then?” she asked, kicking the corpse of the Creature she’d just killed. “I’m not exactly fit for company. Perhaps we could meet later for a discussion over tea?”

“I’m afraid it’s urgent,” he said as she knelt to decapitate her prey— likely for proof of victory. “I think you know why I’m here, so you understand that time is of the essence.”

She didn’t look up at him as she replied.

“If this is about Eren, then I don’t have time to talk.”

Her tone was hard, bitter, and matter-of-fact, and it reminded Armin so much of Jean that it hurt… but just like Jean, Armin would bet that she could be won over by appealing to her inherent sense of human decency

“He’s suffering (Y/N),” he said, awkwardly crouching above the manhole so that she could better see the truth written in his eyes. “He won’t feed.”

“That’s hardly my problem.”

And oh, how well Armin knew that state of mind. If there was one thing Eren Jaeger knew how to do, it was push away the people who loved him most. Armin had dealt with that particularly lovely quirk of his for centuries, and it never got easier to deal with no matter how much time passed. If anything, it got more difficult the older they both got.

“When you’re the solution to a problem, you become a part of it whether you like it or not,” Armin replied, patient and understanding. “He cares for you.”

(Y/N) looked up at him then, fury in her eyes.

“He hurt me.”

Armin shrugged. “He hurts everyone he cares about. It’s just who he is. Nothing comes for free— least of all the love and loyalty of someone as old and as powerful as Eren.”

“Your heart may be toughened to his meanness,” she told him, the head of the creature she’d slain in her hands, “But mine is not, and I don’t like him well enough to willfully remain for him to use as an emotional punching bag.”

At that, Armin couldn’t help but let loose a wry grin.

“No,” he said, “I should think not; but I do think you love him well enough to make sure he doesn’t starve himself to death because he can’t have you.”

(Y/N) was silent for a long moment, then she crossed her arms.

“I won’t come crawling to him. He’s going to have to come to me.”

Armin grimaced. He wasn’t looking forward to that conversation.

“Is that at all negotiable?”

(Y/N) shook her head. “Absolutely not.”

Well, there was nothing for it.

“And you will let him feed if he comes to you?”

(Y/N) thought, then nodded. “If he proves himself deserving.”

Armin couldn't help himself; he laughed. Eren might have met his match in this one.

"Very well. I'll work my magic, and you work yours."

She nodded and bade him farewell, but before Armin left, he paused.

"Hey, (Y/N)?"

"Yes?"

"Thank you."

With that, he left her, ready to take Eren by the ear and throw him at her if he had to.

***

(Y/N)'s heart was racing as she opened the door, knowing good and well who would be behind it.

After her little talk with Armin— and the near heart attack he had given her in the process— she had called in to Zeke and told him she needed to go home to deal with an emergency. A replacement for her patrols had been sent, and she had come home to wash the grim from her skin, making herself as presentable as possible with the time she had. (Y/N) was worried, so worried, that the filth she had been wading in earlier would have left a lingering stench, or even that it had affected the taste of her; she had scrubbed and scrubbed until her skin was raw, hoping to erase every last remnant of her day from her skin…but as it turned out, she needn't have bothered.

Two, three, four hours later, and Eren hadn't shown— it was only now, right at the six hour mark, that he had decided to come to her.

Needless to say, (Y/N) was… less than pleased, but when she opened the door to find Eren pale and drawn, with dark circles beneath his eyes, her heart softened ever-so-slightly. It seemed that Armin was right; he had been suffering.

"You look like shit," she told him quietly, opening her door widely to let him in.

"I assure you, I feel worse," Eren grumbled, but stepped in as she closed the door behind him.

For a long, awkward moment, they just looked at each other, silent and unsure. It was unsettling how unlike himself Eren seemed; he was almost soft when he looked at her, and (Y/N) didn't know how to feel about it. Eventually, though, like two opposite ends of a magnet, they were drawn together, and Eren brushed a piece of hair back from her face.

"Hi," he said, his voice low and rough. (Y/N) caught his hand in hers before it could fall from her hair, and she pressed it against her chest, keeping it trapped there, touching the skin above her beating heart.

"Hey."

They watched each other a moment more before the dam broke between them, and they both spoke at once.

"I'm sorry."

A shared grin, a shy laugh— and then (Y/N) said what they both were thinking.

"You need to feed first, and talk later," she told him, her hand still clasped in his. "You're not off the hook, but I doubt we can have any real conversation with you like this."

Eren nodded gratefully, tugging at her wrist— his usual biting spot— but (Y/N) shook her head, indicating her neck. The thickest, richest blood, she knew, would come from there; and if there was ever a time to be generous with the placement of Eren's bite, she figured that it would be now.

The worst of it was over quickly. There was a brief sting at the intrusion of razor-sharp fangs, and then the vaguely uncomfortable feeling of having something poking down into places that decidedly should not be poked at all, but then (Y/N) quickly eased into the rhythm of the act, focusing wholly on the way Eren's lips felt against her skin. In a few moments, she would become pleasantly light-headed, and then Eren would pull away and look at her like she'd hung the stars. Oh, how she'd missed that look! (Y/N) found herself longing for it even before she quite realized it.

And then, without warning, a vision came, and (Y/N) was swept into another world entirely.

The evening sky rolled endlessly out towards the horizon; it seemed to go on forever, sparkling with more stars than (Y/N) had ever seen before. The full moon was so bright that it cast the whole world in what seemed like silver sunlight, and (Y/N) wondered how anyone could sleep on a night such as this. It was far too beautiful an experience to miss.

Alongside her— alongside Eren, through whose eyes she saw the world— strode Armin and two older-looking cadets who she recognized from previous memories as Reiner and Berthold. Eren was feeling anxious over something, and Reiner and Berthold were… well, they were kind. Reiner especially seemed to be like an older brother, and Eren admired him.

"You'll do just fine tomorrow," said Reiner, placing a large, warm hand on Eren's shoulder. "I'm certain of it."

The memory ended, and (Y/N) came back to herself as Eren's tongue laved over the wounds his fangs had left in her neck, sealing them.

"See anything?" he asked, his breath warm against her skin, and (Y/N) nodded.

"You loved them, too," she said softly, remembering the fondness Eren had felt as though it had been her own. "You loved the Hunters that tried to take everything from you, and— and I think they loved you, too."

Eren pulled away from her, and it was then that she saw the tears shining in his eyes.

"Yes," he replied, his voice broken. "We were children. How could we not love each other as God intended? Hate was never in our nature; it was an inheritance that we couldn't escape."

He paused for a moment, then spoke again.

"I'm sorry I hurt you," he told her, cupping her cheek in his hand. "I lost my temper. I forget— I forget that you're not them."

And (Y/N) understood. She understood that no matter how many centuries passed, there would be wounds that just wouldn't heal for Eren. He would lash out at things that wouldn't make sense to anyone who hadn't experienced the horrors of war as he had. Suddenly, she felt petty for having lashed out as she had, and guilt threatened to rise up and choke her.

"You're forgiven," she replied, leaning into his touch. "It takes two to tango— I shouldn't have baited you like I did. I knew how badly that would hurt you, and that's exactly why I said it."

At that, Eren cracked a grin.

"I expect nothing less from a Kirschtein. Your grandfather would have punched me square in the jaw— and as big as that bastard got when we were older, he probably would have put me on my ass."

(Y/N) couldn't help but laugh, and Eren joined her, their combined joy swelling until there was nothing else in the world but their happiness.

How they started kissing, neither one of them would be able to say afterwards, but in the grand scheme of things, it hardly mattered. Their love was too large to contain, too much to hold back— and it was love, (Y/N) realized, though she hadn't quite put words to it yet. She loved Eren Jaeger, a Creature, a monster, as much as her grandfather before her had and more. She loved him with a desperation that felt like being knocked over by an ocean wave and plunged into depths where her feet no longer touched the sand. She loved him more than she had ever loved anyone before.

And, as he placed her gently on her bed that was barely big enough for two, divesting himself of his shirt above her, (Y/N) thought that maybe she didn't mind it so much as long as he loved her in return.

"I missed you," said Eren, dropping kisses by her ear as he unhooked her bra. "I missed this."

"Me too," she gasped as his mouth wandered to her nipple, her hands fisting in his hair. "Oh, God, I missed you too."

The time for words was soon gone, however; Eren's sinful, sinful mouth traveled lower and lower until he was kissing at the insides of her thighs, parting them to access what lay between, and (Y/N) threw her head back as he spread her open with his hands and sucked brazenly at her clit.

How long he spent there, worshipping her sex, (Y/N) had no idea; all she knew was that she came once from his mouth on her and a second time from his fingers inside her, and when he finally, mercifully withdrew, she was broken down to the simplest parts of herself; there was nothing left but an affection so deep that it threatened to overtake her if she didn't let it out, and she did the only thing she knew to do to release the overwhelming pressure that was building in her chest as Eren pushed his big, veiny cock into her.

She told him what she should have said a long time ago.

"Oh, Eren," she gasped as his cockhead shoved deep inside her. "I love you."

As soon as the words came out of her mouth, Eren went unnaturally still. He looked at her with pupils blown wide inside emerald eyes, and his fangs slightly distended; in any other situation, (Y/N) might have laughed at how surprised he seemed, but it seemed as though she were frozen in time, unable to do anything but stare earnestly up at them, hoping he understood how much she cared for him.

"You… what?"

"I love you," she repeated, her body moving without her permission to roll her hips up into him, moving his cock even further inside her. "Please, Eren, I need—"

He cut her off with a forceful, bruising kiss, and his hips started making slow, deep thrusts inside her, her legs hiked up over his shoulders.

"Again," he said against her lips."Say it again."

"I love you."

Another thrust or two, a hand circling her wounded throat.

"Again."

"I love you, Eren."

"Again."

This time, it was only a whisper.

"I love you," she said, and Eren began fucking her in earnest.

"You are so fucking beautiful," he told her as he thrust hard and deep inside her. "You're every man's dream, a nirvana the damned such as myself were never meant to reach. (Y/N), you are everything, and I—"

He seemed to choke on the words, and (Y/N) kissed him as he tried to regain his composure.

"I don't deserve you," he said, shaking with the force of their passion. "I don't deserve your love."

It's not about deserving, she wanted to say, It never was, but then she was coming again, her climax contracting her walls around her lover, and it was all she could do to remain conscious as Eren fucked her relentlessly through it all, chasing his own high.

It was only later, after a shower and something to eat that they finally spoke again. They were back in bed, and Eren's arm was wrapped around her, as though he were afraid to let her go for even a moment; truthfully, (Y/N) thought he was asleep, but then his breath tickled her ear as he said,

"I love you, angel."

And that, (Y/N) thought, had been worth it all, in the end.

#aot x y/n #aot x reader #aot #aot fanfiction #eren x reader #vampire!eren jaeger #aot smut

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