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loveinhawkins · 1 year

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Head spinning from blood loss, Eddie still manages to keep up a steady stream of curses as he lies in Steve’s arms, as he feels the jolt of Steve sprinting through The Upside Down.

“Fuck,” Eddie breathes. “Fuck, fuck, fuck, fucking bullshit, fuck.”

“Good,” Steve says, frantic and out of breath. “Good, that’s—keep it up, Henderson says it can be, like, a sorta pain relief? Something about—”

“Fuck.” This time, Eddie chuckles through it. “S’not why I’m saying it.”

“No?” Steve says in that weird, measured tone that just silently screams panic, panic, panic. “Why?”

“Jus’ making sure,” Eddie says, and he knows that doesn’t make sense yet, can’t quite get his brain to work everything out. “Those’d be shit last words, so. They won’t be. You… fuck, ow. You know? Here lies Eddie Munson: fuck.”

Steve laughs, maybe a little hysterical, a little desperate, but mostly genuine. “Yeah, you’re right. That’d be really embarrassing, man.”

Eddie suddenly can’t find the energy to act insulted, even though he badly wants to make Steve laugh again—but it turns out, he doesn’t need to say anything, because Steve keeps talking.

“D’you know what that would be, though? A damn good yearbook quote.”

And Eddie laughs, too—laughs even though it hurts. “C’mon, man, Higgins would never let—”

“Eddie,” Steve manages to drawl out, even as he dextrously weaves through the vines on the ground, like Eddie’s just said something particularly naive. “You think Higgins looks over the yearbooks? You just gotta sweet-talk the yearbook committee, they pay the printers to turn a blind eye, and—”

“Yeah, ‘cause that’s what I’m known for. Sweet-talking,” Eddie says. He tries very hard not to cough, has the horrible feeling that he might tear himself in two if he does.

“Don’t sell yourself short, dude,” Steve says.

And Eddie would blame that on the blood loss for making him hear things, but then Steve’s hands gently squeeze around him like he means it, and…

“So what… what was your yearbook quote, Harrington?” Eddie says. He firmly ignores the fact that his voice is becoming increasingly slurred.

Steve picks up the pace, kicks through the door into the trailer. His breath hitches once, but not from physical strain; Eddie knows that he’s frightened.

“Ah, ah, ah,” Steve replies, chiding, because he’s so goddamn brave, too. “Not telling you that until we get out of this.”

“Tease,” Eddie says.

But he must not get it out very clearly, because as Steve heads to the Gate, he murmurs, “Stay with me, Eddie.”

There’s some rope Steve had stashed in the corner of the living room, just in case, and Robin and Nancy must’ve made use of it to get Dustin through, because it’s already hovering in the air, waiting for them.

“Okay,” Steve says, half to himself. “I’ve got this.”

Eddie attempts a nod. The room spins.

Or maybe it’s just that they’re moving somehow, that Steve’s pulling them both up the rope, somehow not letting go of Eddie; and then he can hear muted yells from the other side, and he’s being lifted up on his own, like he’s ascending to heaven or some bullshit like that, and he almost wants to demand a re-mark on his English paper, because religious symbolism is fucking hilarious, actually.

“You’re a goddamn trapeze artist, Harrington,” he says, and Steve must hear him this time, because there’s a laugh from just behind him, a fucking beautiful laugh, and then Eddie’s falling, and he’s—

“Oh,” Eddie gasps, and his hand goes to his side instinctively, and he didn’t think he had much more blood in his body left to lose, but… “Oh, shit.”

His vision tilts sickeningly, and right before he passes out, he sees Steve appear in front of him, sees his face turn white.

“Eddie,” he’s saying, “Nance, what do I—oh my god—”

When Eddie wakes up, everything is fuzzy, his head full of cotton. There’s a metallic taste in his mouth that he has enough awareness not to panic about, that he somehow knows isn’t blood.

“So?” he says through the fog, lifts his eyelids just enough to see Steve is beside him. “What’s your yearbook quote?”

“Christ, you’re annoying,” Steve says with a smile, but he’s speaking in the thick, nasal tones of someone who’s been crying. “Thought you were on stuff that makes you forget all the stupid shit.”

“S’not stupid,” Eddie says indignantly.

For some reason, Steve’s eyes soften. “If you say so. Just rest right now, Eddie.”

“Can’t,” Eddie moans. He’s already made the mistake of looking up: the lights are too bright, quickly turning into nauseating swirls. “Feel sick.”

“That’s okay,” Steve says. “They said that’s normal. Hey, shh, just lie back. It’ll pass.”

But Eddie shakes his head and—ooh, shit, not a good idea.

“Y’should move, man,” he says. “Don’t wanna puke on you.”

Steve scoffs. “Eddie, you could literally throw up in my hair, and I wouldn’t give a shit.”

Eddie laughs, feels a bit pathetic that it comes out wet around the edges. “I just… wanna sleep,” he says, because he does, but he knows the nausea will keep him up—feels abruptly tearful, like he had done as a child with whooping cough, up for the whole night despite his fatigue.

“Here,” Steve says. “Close your eyes.”

And as he does so, Eddie feels a soothingly cool palm across his forehead. Steve. It’s such a gentle touch, such a kind touch that Eddie thinks he might cry—thinks he can only partly blame whatever drugs he’s on.

“Better?” Steve asks.

“Better,” Eddie agrees. And then, like a fool, he hurriedly says, “Don’t stop, though,” out of fear that Steve will draw his hand back at the answer.

Steve doesn’t laugh, doesn’t tease him even the slightest bit.

“I won’t,” he says, like an oath. His thumb rubs over Eddie’s temple. “M’sorry you feel shitty.”

“It’s okay. You’re right, it’s passing. Think… think it was just… lookin’ at the lights.”

Eddie sighs without meaning to, lulled by the repetitive path Steve’s fingers are tracing, over and over.

“Mm-hmm. Keep your eyes closed, then.” Steve hums softly, just in thought, not even close to a lullaby, but Eddie feels himself starting to drift off to it anyway.

“It’s a nice room you’ve got,” Steve says. “I would’ve rioted if it wasn’t. Big window. Just a view of the parking lot, sorry, not exactly five stars.” Another hum. “Kinda pretty in its own way, though. It’s getting a bit warmer. I saw—the other day, I looked out and saw these kids, there’s some grass a little bit away from… they were making daisy chains, I think. Was never good at… couldn’t get ‘em to tie right. So I’d just kinda tug at the grass, and… Hey, d’you know, some of the kids—like, our kids, I mean—they don’t even know about the buttercup thing, holding it to see if it like, glows, under your chin? I told Max about it when she got outta here—shh, she’s okay—and she just looked at me like I was crazy. She’s good at daisy chains, man, she told Lucas it was five dollars per flower and he paid it all, wore the damn thing on his wrist for the whole day. Stupidly sweet, but I couldn’t even say so or she’d, like, punch me.”

And Eddie’s used to painting a picture with words, used to creating fantastical landscapes out of thin air during campaigns. But as Steve goes on, talking about the kids (their kids), and flowers, and all the little signs of spring that he can’t see, Eddie falls asleep thinking that Steve’s given him the most beautiful, ever-changing view: how he sees the world.

Eddie doesn’t forget about the yearbook, but he doesn’t bring it up, simply because Steve keeps quiet about it.

It’s after a few weeks of the dust settling, reassurances that the nightmare’s over: of seeing Wayne and breaking down in tears of relief, of countless visits from everyone—mostly Dustin, second only to Wayne, of course; Eddie still says Steve’s tied for second place, at least, but Dustin insists it doesn’t count whenever Steve’s only there fleetingly to drop him off before heading to work.

It’s on an afternoon when he’s not expecting anyone, and Steve comes in, drops the yearbook right on top of his blankets.

Eddie looks down at it, hovers his hand over the front cover until Steve raises one eyebrow, as if to say, go ahead.

It doesn’t take long for Eddie to find him. The picture is… there’s something beautifully imperfect about it, as if Steve had been caught by surprise by the flash going off when it did, lips tilted into a smile that’s relaxed rather than the typical rigid, picture-perfect look.

Eddie thinks that he finally gets what Wayne means whenever he says someone has ‘soulful eyes.’

And underneath the little box framing Steve’s picture, there’s…

There’s nothing. It doesn’t stand out, because not everyone on that page had opted to have a quote, but…

Eddie looks up. Steve shrugs, but his eyes are downcast.

“Yeah, sorry.” His voice is quiet; Eddie can hear a touch of embarrassment, and he hates it. “It’s not even… I didn’t even choose to keep it blank, really, the yearbook committee gave the deadline so far in advance, it… I had the time. Could’ve put anything.” He shrugs again. “Guess I couldn’t… guess I just, um… had nothing to say.”

Eddie closes the book. Sets it aside. Doesn’t take his eyes off Steve.

He gets it. If it’s even possible for him to be included in a yearbook, he’s confident he’d do the same—how do you even begin to sum up…? There’s nothing he could say about this year.

There are no words for it. For any of it.

But Eddie knows the ones that count.

“Tell me about work,” he says. He has the feeling Steve’s determinedly squeezed in a visit during his lunch break, his name tag askew.

Steve smiles, wrinkles his nose uncertainly. “But that’s so boring.”

“Nah,” Eddie says. “Maybe I like hearing what you have to say.”

Steve looks up finally; he smiles a little like he had in the photograph, as if something like a flash has surprised him.

And he talks about work.

But it’s more than that; it’s so much more. Eddie’s getting to see through a precious window.

He hears about how Steve noticed Robin wearing odd socks, and he only teased her about it when he was sure it wasn’t a deliberate twist on fashion she was trying out. How the sun meant it was hard to see the T.V, so he drew the blinds when no customers were around, made it feel like him and Robin had their own private cinema. And Eddie smiles fondly when Steve recalls smelling some kind of coconut perfume he couldn’t place, and Robin had started a list guessing names, just because he said it reminded him of a family vacation when he was four.

Eddie sees it all.

He doesn’t need clever one liners, or statements of grandeur.

He just needs Steve’s words.

#a thank u ficlet for all the kind messages ❤️ nbtdad getting worked on will be ready as soon as i can make it❤️#steddie #steddie fic #steddie ficlet #steve x eddie #steve harrington #eddie munson

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ordinaryschmuck · 4 months

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I love that The Ghost and Molly McGee's forced cancellation isn't just frustrating to fans of the show but to people in the animation industry as well. They're just as sick as we are about how much studios disrespect animation. They keep looking for the next Spongebob, Simspons, or goodness forbid Family Guy, but instead having faith in the creators and their content, they just...wait. They wait to make a profit and do the bare minimum to market their shows and make them available.

Let's look at Gravity Falls for example. I remember that when Gravity Falls was still airing, you would be able to find out a new episode was coming out based on coming across a commercial by random chance or by the people working the show promoting it online. Add that with the fact that it was on a different channel that required you paying MORE for your cable to get it. It WAS available through Disney Channel, a channel more available at a cheaper price, but the entire of Season Two got moved to the more expensive Disney XD, where Disney shows go to die, because...REASONS. With no warning or announcement. I think I found out about Gravity Falls moving to Disney XD because the trailer played during a commercial break. And that's just the START the show's problems. Mixed in with poor marketing, the show would have a crazy inconsistent schedule, where we'd have four episodes a week, a few months of NOTHING, a few more episodes a week, nothing for a few months, a random episode playing between that nothingness with next to no promotion, and all of that happening to the rest of the show until it finally died a slow death with its series finale where four episodes got stretched out for six months. That...is NOT okay. And it doesn't stop with Gravity Falls.

Steven Universe, OK KO, Ducktales 2017, Amphibia, The Owl House, and now Ghost and Molly McGee are all shows that had similar and sometimes WORSE treatments as Gravity Falls did, where the networks gave next to NO marketing, the creators had to promote their own shows themselves, and the airing schedules were so inconsistent with wildly long hiatuses that only the most dedicated fans were willing to keep watching. General audiences (mainly kids) weren't willing to keep up with shows that had ongoing stories if the episodes stories kept being too spaced apart and never had reruns as frequent as other shows like Teen Titans Go or Big City Greens (Or whatever's constantly on network TV nowadays. I don't know. I mostly watch shit on streaming).

The people of the animation industry is catching onto all of these tricks, and they're getting sick of it. They're getting sick of inconsistent schedules. They're getting sick of trying to bend over backwards in every possible way to make the show they wanted. By either making serialized content as episodic as possible so the network could air it more or by condensing their stories as much as they can, already expecting that forced cancellation to happen sooner than later. And in some cases, they don't even get the luxury of being told their show is ending. Did you know that Inside Job and Paranormal Park both had seasons that were already in development before Netflix pulled the plug shortly after releasing new episodes of their shows? Did you know that The Ghost and Molly McGee was already working on a Season Three before Disney shut that down so they had to force out a series finale that would still be good despite the cancellation? Because it's true. It's ALWAYS true. Creators want to make MORE, but the studios won't let them because they didn't profit off of it. Except they WOULD HAVE if they treated it better.

I want kids to grow up with characters that stick around through their childhood, just like I did with mine. I want kids to have their own Ed, Edd n Eddy, Codename: Kids Next Door, Phineas and Ferb, or Kim Possible. I want kids to watch shows that last more than two-three seasons, stick around for years, and leave an impact as if they have all the time in the world because to them, it feels like they do. I want kids to have a show that ends on a high note because the creators wanted it and not because the networks demanded it. But the unfortunate thing is that it doesn't seem possible nowadays. Because if a mostly episodic show like The Ghost and Molly McGee fails, despite being charming and inoffensive and something most kids will love, the what hope IS left.

#the ghost and molly mcgee #gravity falls #steven universe #ok ko #ducktales 2017 #amphibia #the owl house #disney #cartoon network #netflix #animation #rant

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jayteacups · 5 months

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It's A Wrap!

Working on Attack on Titan as a makeup artist has irreversibly changed your life. As the end rapidly approaches, you find that letting go is harder than you’d thought. After years of harbouring feelings for Levi that you can’t divulge, his final day on set arrives. You know it’s time to say goodbye to him and part ways—but maybe you don’t have to.

Pairing: Levi Ackerman x GN!Reader

Tags & warnings: Actor!Levi, Makeup artist!Reader, fluff, confessions, friends/idiots to lovers, alcohol consumption, briefly implied sexual content, AOT finale spoilers

Word count: 6.9k words

A/N: I’m back, happy Levi month everyone! I wrote this over the last month to cope with the fact AOT was ending and also life stuff. This is incredibly self indulgent, also I would love to tell more stories and scenarios in this AU, so this probably won’t be the last one-shot I write for actor!Levi and MUA!Reader hehehe. Disclaimer that I don't work in film or TV or makeup, sorry if there are any inaccuracies. Also please forgive me for the uncreative title, lol. Hope you enjoy the fic!

Levi’s last day on set is bittersweet.

For the final time, you lean against the wall and count down the seconds on your watch. The trailer door swings open to reveal the man of the hour. On par for the course, Levi arrives fifteen minutes on the dot before his scheduled arrival time. He’s holding his usual steaming flask of tea in one hand, with a nondescript rucksack (save for a Badtz-Maru keychain gifted to him from the Sanrio collaboration) slung over his shoulder.

“Hey,” you greet him, pushing off from the wall, moving towards him like a moth to flame. He sets down his things in the sitting area and meets you halfway, letting you pull him into your arms. After years of working alongside each other, you’ve both grown accustomed to greeting each other like this in private, especially after the stress the two of you had put yourselves under during the Season 3 shoots.

“How are you feeling? It’s your last day.” You ask him as the two of you part. To your dismay, you’re already missing the warmth of his embrace.

“I’m fine. I’m not going to get all sappy about it.” His face is placid.

“That’s what Hange said when they filmed their death scene, and we saw how that ended,” you say lightheartedly. Hange had sworn to remain jovial and upbeat throughout their last day, but after seeing the several other actors cry at their phenomenal acting, they had promptly broken down. “And I bet you anything that Eren’s going to say that when he and Mikasa do the cabin scene next week, and we all know he’ll be the first to start crying and the last to stop.”

Levi rolls his eyes before he enters the wardrobe area, but you know he’s not serious. “If you think I’m going to break down in tears like Hange and the kids did, you’re dead wrong,” he continues, out of sight.

You smile. “Sure. It’s alright, you know, if you do end up crying. It’s an end of an era, we’re all going to get emotional.”

A few moments later, Levi emerges in costume, sans the bandages. He sits down in front of the mirror at the vanity table. “Yes, but I’m satisfied with what I’ve done here, and I have no regrets,” he muses out loud, continuing on from before. “And it’s not like I’m done with the show. There’s the wrap party, then the press tour and all that. So don’t expect me to get all worked up today. I’m not saying goodbye to Attack on Titan just yet.” His voice softens towards the end.

But it is goodbye for us, you wish to say. And I don’t want it to be. You haven’t been contracted for any of their press events. After you finish with Attack on Titan, you’ll have a handful of weeks before your upcoming contract for a new show begins. It’s a wonderful opportunity; the show is airing on a major streaming service and requires you to push your SFX skills to the limit. Sasha had been cast in one of the main roles and both Onyankopon and Nifa will make appearances too, so you’ll see some familiar faces on this new project. But selfishly, you aren’t ready to let go and move forward. Selfishly, you aren’t ready to part ways with Levi.

Sure, the two of you will make an effort to talk every now and then. You know him far better than to assume he’ll stop talking to you the moment Attack on Titan is finished; despite him being standoffish at first, it’s clear Levi cares deeply about everybody he’s ever worked with, cast or crew alike. But the chances of your demanding schedules ever lining up again are close to zero, and sooner or later, your frequent messages will fizzle out into a conversation lost to the ages. You’ll drift, until the two of you are strangers once more. It’s inevitable; you’ve seen it happen before with your actor friends from old projects. No doubt it’ll happen again.

You consider addressing the elephant in the room, wondering if it lingers on his mind, too. But instead, you hum in agreement and pass him a headband to hold his hair out of the way. He puts it on, clearly content to not bring it up just yet.

Levi chews on the inside of his cheek as you sort out your equipment on the vanity table. Your eyes are immediately drawn to his lips, which are a little more chapped than usual. It’s clear there is something else that’s bothering him, but you decide to let it go for now. Sometimes Levi just needs to sit with his thoughts for a moment. You’ve learned that being pushed just makes him close himself off even more. A life in the limelight can be unforgiving. Kuchel Ackerman had been the brightest star of her generation, but behind the scenes, her personal life was far from glamorous. It doesn’t surprise you that her son keeps his heart and feelings well-guarded.

As he sits and stews, you apply chapstick and some basic ‘barely-there’ makeup on his face, before creating the illusion of a hard-fought battle by adding a light layer of grime to his face. You’ll add more after the scar and bandages. As you work, Levi takes out a folder from his bag, which is embellished with a small cat sticker that Hange had stuck on years ago. From it, he takes his copy of the script, nary a crease in the sheets. Brow furrowed, he reads it over and over, mouthing his lines with the fervour of a prayer.

Now, that is odd.

“There is something on your mind, isn’t there?” You’ve also read the script for today’s scene. The director had decided to save Levi’s most poignant scene—where his character salutes the ghosts of his fallen comrades—for the very end of his shoot. (Levi’s epilogue scene had been shot a week prior.) This would be his most challenging scene yet, for it would be the first time he and his character will ever cry on screen. “You can tell me if you want. Anything you need to help you focus. There’s still time.” You give him a quick squeeze on his shoulder.

Stormy eyes glance up at his reflection, than up at yours. He puts down the script and sighs, voice subdued. “I just want to do the Captain’s ending justice, and I don’t think I can.”

“I think you can,” you murmur. You gesture for him to close his eyes, and pick up your finest brush. Willing your hand and heart into steadiness, you bring the brush up to his forehead, where the largest scar begins. You’ll never get used to how infuriatingly gorgeous he is. “No. I know you can. There is no doubting just how much you care about portraying him correctly.”

He swallows. “Well, I’ve never cried on camera before.” He stops, giving you a moment to work.

With the utmost care, you begin to draw the main line of the largest scar, the one that passes through his eye and lips. As the brush passes over his eyelid, it twitches ever so slightly, his long lashes tickling your hand. Smiling, you brush away a stray lash that had fallen onto his cheek. As you extend the line down his cheek, you try to reassure him. Levi’s usually so steadfast, but it makes sense that something like this would grow heavy on his mind.

“You’ve been practicing it with your coach, though, right? I mean, I’ve had to cover up your swollen eyes a number of times this season.”

“Yeah. Thanks for that, by the way.”

“Don’t mention it.”

The brush reaches his lips. He opens his eyes, looking up at you through lowered lashes. Your heart aflutter, you staunchly ignore any and all thoughts of kissing him. Doing so has become more and more difficult with every passing day. Especially when every now and then, you think you see him glancing down at your lips whenever you lean in close to examine a detail of your work.

It’s more than likely that you’re imagining it, though.

Finally, the brush reaches his chin, finishing the outline of the first scar. You lean back to admire your work. After many instances of painstakingly painting on the scars and agonising over continuity, you don’t have to look at your old reference pictures to know the exact shape and curve of them, down to the millimetre. But you do so anyway, and smile in satisfaction when you compare today’s line to the pictures from the first time you drew them on him for practice. A perfect match.

“I know you’ve been working hard at it,” you continue assuring him, putting down the reference photos. “You’ve definitely come a long way.”

“Yeah, but I’m shit at it, actually. All those times we joked about how Eren would take forever to conjure a single tear every time he needed to cry, and now here I am in the exact same position. He’s going to rub this in my face should he ever find out.” He chews the inside of his cheek again, looking down. “Damn it. Don’t know what’s wrong with me today. I’m not… I don’t get nervous. I don’t show up to work feeling unprepared. That isn’t me. But today, it is.”

It’s unsettling, to see him so unsure of himself. His nerves are understandable, as he came into the show with more of a stuntman background and little actual acting experience. But anybody who’s worked alongside him could easily tell you just how dedicated he is to improving his craft, and that nobody else could play the Captain with the same quiet subtleties that Levi brings to the screen.

You hope your smile is somewhat reassuring to him. “And that’s okay. You know, crying on command really isn’t easy. I’ve worked with countless actors and many also find it difficult.” In your experience, most actors need a while to work themselves up to cry. The most obvious exception is Armin, who has the unnerving ability to turn it on and off like a light switch. “For you, all you need to do is make one tear out of one eye. You’ve managed to do that before, right?”

He nods, but the firm clench of his jaw and the crease between his brows don’t fade.

“So, it’s nothing that you haven’t practiced. And on the off chance that you can’t do it today, that’s perfectly fine. I have eyedrops in my bag.”

“Yeah, but…” He shakes his head in frustration. “This is going to sound dumb, but it… I don’t know, that feels like cheating. I know you’re thinking I’m being an idiot, and I probably am. I know eyedrops are common practice. It’s just… This is my character’s last moment before the epilogue, and I want it to be real. I don’t want to take the easy way out.”

“No, it’s not stupid. There’s no shame in needing to use eyedrops if you end up not being able to cry today, but it’s really admirable that you want to do it as authentically as possible. I think that since this is your final scene, and so many people are returning this morning, it’ll be easier than usual to muster up those tears.” Reaching for a set of different brushes and paint, you instruct him, “here’s what we’re going to do. I need you to just listen whilst I do the rest of your scars. I don’t want you to get trapped in your head about this, okay? Overthinking will just make it harder to get into character. Isn’t that what you said to Mikasa all those years back? It worked wonders for her. I often forget that this show was her first ever gig, with how good she’s become.”

He scoffs. “Really? You’re using my own words against me?”

“Well, what use is your own advice if you can’t follow it yourself?”

After a moment of hesitation, Levi sighs in defeat and closes his eyes again. “Shit, you’re relentless. Fine, then. I’ll trust you.”

You get to work, drawing the outlines of the second scar parallel to the first, then the smaller ones on his other cheek. As you add in the details, such as the texture of the stitches, you remind Levi of another story that he himself told you. He’d never worked with horses before being cast in this show, and yet was one of the quickest learners. Unsurprisingly so, since he’s incredibly kinaesthetically intelligent. To this day, the cast insists he looks the most at ease atop a horse, only second to Erwin, who actually used to ride in his childhood. You remind him that every single time, his hard work has more than paid off.

Somewhere down the line, you go off topic. Levi makes no move to stop you. In fact, he seems content just to listen to you talk about anything, everything. As the wounds take shape on his face, you reminisce on anecdotes from set, on the time the two of you spent together. With fondness, you recall your first meeting. Back then, you were an lowly assistant on the SFX team, transforming an unassuming man into the wounded soldier who, in his dying moments, listened to the Captain’s vow to eradicate the titans and bring meaning to his sacrifice. You talk about how the two of you grew closer during the filming of the second season, when Levi had a lot more free time to talk. How difficult the third season had been to film due to both of you being spread thin by additional responsibilities.

You skim over that time Levi mentioned you in an interview when asked about a favourite memory on set, and how warm it made you feel. You don’t talk about how you’d genuinely teared up after watching the final cut of the scene where Hange discovers a half-dead Levi by the riverbank, despite knowing that his ‘injuries’ were nothing more than your own handiwork.

And, with your heart clenching painfully, you certainly don’t dare to bring up the almost-kiss at last year’s cast and crew Halloween party.

———

“Cut! Perfect! Aaand that’s a wrap for Levi!”

The set erupts into thunderous applause. You clap heartily alongside the rest of the cast and crew. A deafening symphony of whoops and cheers fills the air, and if not for the growing lump in your throat, you’d join in too.

A standing ovation. Levi deserves it and more. Just as you expected, every angle the director wanted to capture had needed one take each, not a single one more. No eyedrops needed.

From your position, you can see Levi still sitting by the rock. Strangely, he makes no move to get up. Curious as to why, you peer past some crew members that had moved in the way, but you’re greeted with a sight that pulls at your heartstrings. Your eyes sting with new tears.

Curled up by the rock, Levi has his face buried in his hands, his shoulders heaving with quiet sobs.

Something in your chest aches. You knew that he would get emotional at the end—there was no way he wouldn’t, especially considering that his character cried too—but you didn’t expect him to feel so overwhelmed.

On instinct, your feet propel you towards him, but you’re promptly cut off by a few other crew members moving around. Through your rapidly blurring vision, you can only watch as several of the returning cast members rush forward from the smoke. Hange reaches him first, and pulls him into a bone-crushing hug. Erwin is second, kneeling next to the duo and rubbing Levi’s back comfortingly.

Sniffling, you quickly wipe away your tears, remembering suddenly that you still have something to do. Unnoticed, you slip away from set.

There is a tradition amongst the cast that whenever a character dies, the actor receives a bouquet of flowers from the cast and crew. (A size limit had to be enforced after a very emotional Gabi had presented Sasha with a bouquet so large it couldn’t fit through the trailer door.) For this final season, the tradition has expanded to gifting the actor a bouquet when they wrap, for the characters that survive all the way to the very end.

The door to Connie’s trailer is unlocked when you arrive, just as he said it would be. Inside, you find a vase full of vibrantly coloured flowers on the kitchenette counter in the exact spot where you’d left it earlier this morning. Several weeks ago, the cast and crew had all nominated you to put in the order for the bouquet and present it to Levi on his final day, and Connie had offered to help you hide it from Levi until it was time. Careful to not drip water all over the floor, you pick up the flowers and jog back to set.

The fog machines are being carried out by the time you return. You immediately scan the set for Levi, but it seems he has been completely buried under a massive group hug with the veterans cast, no doubt Hange’s doing. You can’t help but smile at the sight. Most of the crew members appear to be taking a break before clean-up, as it is the end of the day. The air is filled with chatter, but a hush descends upon the crowd as you approach.

The actors peel away from the hug one by one. A smiling Petra helps Levi get to his feet. The bandages on his face are halfway unravelled. With one hand, he yanks them off, leaving both of his eyes to gaze at you unobstructed, ablaze with an intense emotion you can’t quite place. With his other hand, he quickly wipes away the half-dried tears on his cheeks.

“On behalf of the cast and crew,” you say hoarsely, “I give you these.” You step forward and present him the bouquet. “It’s been an honour. Thank you for everything, Levi.”

His fingers gently graze yours as he takes the flowers from you. Tenderly, he holds them close to his chest.

“I was wondering where you went just now,” he says. Of course he’d noticed. “Should’ve known you’d be the one to give me this…” His voice wavers towards the end. He scoffs and wipes at his eyes. “And to think I was done blubbering like a baby. Damn it. You were right.”

He pulls you into a hug without a second thought.

———

Somehow, you’ve been roped into taking photos for everyone. Levi unwraps the bandages around his hand before he begins. He first takes a photo with the director and producer, who both thanking him dearly. They part with a handshake. Almost immediately after, the cast members of the Alliance, along with Eren and Zeke, all swarm forward for a big group photo. They’d all come to watch in support, even if several of them weren’t scheduled to come in today. Connie confesses that he’d helped hide the bouquet by letting you into his trailer. Levi makes a light-hearted remark that he should’ve figured that out too, considering Connie also helped hide Hange’s bouquet—which Levi himself had been responsible for ordering and retrieving.

The veteran actors come forward next. Fitting them all into the camera frame was a challenge, but you manage to do it after one of your makeup assistants finds you a stool. Somehow, Erwin manages to persuade Levi into doing the Scout salute with the rest of them. (“I just did it in the scene, though… Fine, I’ll indulge in your corniness for today, you dorks.”) When he presses his fist to his chest one last time, the veterans erupt into cheers.

Hange and Erwin both stay back for a little longer. The trio pose for more photos, all grinning widely, though you decide to put a stop to the mini-photoshoot when Hange attempts to pick Levi up bridal-style and almost drops him.

(“When I said ‘put me down’, I didn’t mean for you to drop me with no fucking warning!”

“I didn’t mean to drop you. Besides, I caught you, didn’t I? You’re fine, see?”)

After that fiasco, Levi asks to take one with the original Special Ops Squad, as it had been years since they’d managed to meet up.

Zeke comes back for another photo, slipping one arm around Levi’s shoulders. As you meet the taller man’s eyes over the top of his phone, he winks mischievously, holding two fingers up in bunny ears above Levi’s unsuspecting head. Say nothing, he mouths to you. With a herculean effort, you suppress your laugh. Zeke has made it his personal mission to photobomb every main cast member from the finale. After months of shooting, Levi is the last one standing, and it’s incredibly entertaining how hard Zeke tries to finish his mission, even now.

“Hand down, Zeke.”

“Damn it, how did you know?”

“You’re about as subtle as Reiner is when he pretends he hasn’t broken a prop.”

Zeke laughs. “Nothing gets past you, Levi, does it?”

As the two continue to playfully bicker, more jokes than actual verbal barbs, you open the photo you’d managed to take split seconds before Levi called Zeke out. “Mission accomplished,” you say, and a delighted Zeke reaches over Levi’s head to high-five you. Looking mildly betrayed, Levi whips his head back around to face you.

You grin sheepishly as you pass Zeke’s phone back to him, the photo on display. “Sorry. I had to help him.”

“Why are you two like this?” Levi says, shaking his head, barely holding back a smile. He and Zeke part after a hug and a promise to get drinks soon.

Levi’s promptly joined by Falco and Gabi, and after their photo is taken, he ruffles their hair affectionately, which makes Gabi yelp. He really has stepped into the ‘cast dad’ role, a development that you find endlessly endearing. Soon after, their parents arrive to take them home— the kids have quite an early start tomorrow to film their scenes with Annie and Kiyomi on the boat.

Jean and Connie take the chance to snatch a couple of selfies with him, before the latter asks if he could join them to film a TikTok for the show’s official account. To Levi’s utmost relief, it isn’t a dance challenge. Connie instead asks him a few questions about how he feels about the show ending, and what the show means to him—he’s putting together a montage of every cast member’s responses.

On the sidelines, just out of view, you watch Levi give his answers. An ember of warmth kindles in your chest.

Soon after, Levi’s approached by the stunt team, headed by an old friend of Levi’s from his stuntman days. She’d made a cameo in the third season as Kenny’s lieutenant. You happily take a group photo for them.

After you hand Caven’s phone back to her, Hange taps you on the shoulder, having finished catching up with the other cast members. You smile as they hug you tight, swaying on the spot; today is the first time you’ve seen them since they filmed their death scene a few months back.

“It’s so good to see you!” They say, linking arms with yours. “Sorry it took so long to come and find you.”

“Don’t worry! It’s lovely having you back. How are you finding your return?”

“It’s great! I’ve really been missing this, even though it hasn’t been that long.” They pout.

“Oh, we’ve all missed you too, Hange,” you say, smiling. “Have you been up to much since you left?”

“Well, I visited my dad for a bit, then I sent in an audition tape for this thriller movie that my agent thinks I’ll be a good pick for. I also got a few other offers, but I’m a little on the fence. I’ll consider those if I don’t get that thriller role, but who knows when I’ll hear back from them?”

“I bet you’ll get it. Thrillers are right up your alley.”

“You flatter me, dear,” They grin. “Anyways, I am here to say that you are the only one left who has not taken a picture with Levi. And that needs to change. The two of you need something to remember this day by!” You realise they’ve been guiding you towards the rock, where Levi, Mikasa, Armin and Eren are deep in conversation. The younger actors are laughing boisterously at something Levi had said, heads tilted back, sporting wide grins. Levi’s still cradling his bouquet carefully, a soft smile as he speaks, looking up at his younger cast mates with endearment. Your heart warms at the sight.

The quartet look up as you approach. The younger actors wave goodbye, disappearing into the crowd. Hange quickly ushers you and Levi together, their phone already out of their pocket. “Alrighty, here we go!” They cheer. “Oi, look lively now, Levi. It’s the last photo!”

“Was about time we did this,” you whisper to him as you come close. At first, you settle into your usual stance whenever you take a photo with a cast member, but Levi is not just any cast member. Not to you. Gnawing on your lip, you grapple with yourself for a fleeting moment. Your professional side barely puts up a resistance, and so you lean in to whisper a question. Briefly, you wonder what it would feel like to kiss the delicate shell of his ear. You banish the traitorous thought, best as you can.

“Hey, can I put my arm around you for this?” As close as you and Levi have grown over the years, the two of you save your brief hugs for behind the scenes, in private. Physical affection is rare with him otherwise—whilst the cast tend to be very touchy with one another, Levi is usually seen on the sides, watching them with a quiet fondness in his eyes. That hug from earlier—it had to be a fluke, right?

And yet, he sighs, and bridges the small gap between you. His free arm moves behind you, a warm, firm hand comes to rest at your back. “You don’t have to ask, you know,” he murmurs in return. “I hugged you earlier, didn't I? Quit worrying. Go ahead.”

Warmth blooming inside you, you lean sideways towards him on impulse. You slide your own arm behind him, and Levi leans into your touch. “Just so you know,” he continues, “it was an honour working with you too.”

Hange starts to count down from three. A wave of emotion hits you, almost sweeps you off your feet. This is it. Your last day of working with him.

Still so much left unsaid.

Straining to keep your composure, you offer a wide, bright smile for the camera.

———

The next few hours are spent tidying and cleaning up. Most of the actors have gone home, but Levi stays behind to help out the crew, as he always does without fail. With how emotionally taxing the day had been, it’s a wonder he didn’t go back to his trailer immediately to crash. As if you couldn’t admire him any more.

Your eyelids are heavy by the time you finish up and arrive at Levi’s trailer. When you enter, he is slumped in a chair in front of the vanity mirror, already changed out of his costume.

Neither of you say a single word as you carefully wipe away the scars and the grime. Your traitorous hands linger for a split second too long whenever they brush against his smooth skin. In his stormy eyes are that same intense look he’d given you when you first appeared with the bouquet.

You wonder what it means.

Sooner or later, one of you will have to break this fragile silence. Levi decides to take the matter into his own hands, catching you off guard. “I guess this is it.”

The sting in your eyes returns with a fierce vengeance. You turn away for a moment, rapidly blinking your oncoming tears away. An invisible vice clamps down, mercilessly clenching your chest.

You choke on your words, but you get them out somehow. “I’ll miss you.” Not the three words you’ve been yearning to say for the last year, but it will have to do. “I’m going to miss you. So much. It’s been…” You wrack your brain, but there is no singular adjective you know of that could truly describe the past few years working on this show with him. “You know what I mean. Right?”

“I know what you mean.” Levi stands, turning to face you properly. The troubled crease between his brows return. “Look, I… I have to tell you something. Hear me out?”

Your heart thunders in your chest. You nod. “Yeah. Of course.”

His Adam’s apple bobs as he swallows. “Remember this morning? I said I was satisfied with my work here. That I have no regrets.”

Barely able to breathe, you can only manage to nod.

“But that isn’t true. Not really. There is one thing I regret,” he says, slowly, cautiously.

Voice barely a whisper, you ask. “What is it?”

“That we never talked about what almost happened at Halloween last year.”

The world comes to a halt.

Dimmed lights. Bass reverberates through your bones. The aftertaste of a Bloody Mary lingers on your tongue. Levi is just centimetres away, his chest almost flush with yours. His eyes valiantly fight to stay focused on the intricate titan-shifter makeup on your cheeks, before he gives in and his line of sight drops to your lips. Unconsciously, he leans in slightly, seemingly gravitating towards you.

Devastating. That is the first word that comes to your mind. It is high time you realise that he will be the end of you; he could ask anything of you and you’d do it. Your heart beats for him.

Caught in his orbit, your face tilts towards his.

A drunken crew member barges past, jostling your shoulder. You yelp, stumbling to the side, before Levi’s hands—warm, steady, safe—catch you. The spell broken, he lets go the moment you are upright, averting his eyes from yours. Levi takes a step backwards—a small one, because there is barely any space in the corner of the room the two of you are tucked into. But to you, he suddenly feels so distant, that he might as well be on the other side of the universe.

“I need some air,” he says, stoic mask falling back into place. Before you can ask him what’s wrong, Levi turns on his heel and disappears into the crowd, taking all the warmth of the room with him.

No. This is dangerous territory. Since that night, the two of you had constructed an unspoken agreement to pretend nothing had ever happened. Levi had never made any impression that it was anything other than a drunken lapse in professionalism. For a while, you wondered if he even remembered that moment, or if it had all been in your head, a result of you projecting your own desires onto him.

Regardless, he had never brought it up. You’d been content to do the same. It was—and still is—impossible to fathom that Levi would ever want you.

“Tell me,” he says hoarsely, “that I wasn’t imagining things that night, and every day since. Tell me I’m not imagining that you’ve been looking at me like…”

Your breath hitches in your throat. “Like what?”

“Like that!” He snaps. His hands tremble in a way you’ve never seen before as he gestures towards you, voice tinged with desperation. “Like how you’re looking at me right now. I-I don’t know how I didn’t see it sooner. Because if I had… maybe I would’ve…”

The staggering realisation of what he’s trying to say sinks in.

Choking back a sob of relief, you reach out for his hands, and he offers them to you with no resistance. A light blush sweeps across his face as he stares at your interlocking fingers with something akin to wonder.

Breathlessly, you dare to ask. “Do you mean it? That if you had known how I felt, you… you would’ve kissed me?”

“Yes. I would’ve. I wanted to, more than anything.” With that, Levi finally looks up from your joined hands. The burning look he’s been giving you all throughout today—you recognise it, now, plain and simple.

His earlier words ring in your mind. I don’t know how I didn’t see it sooner.

“Oh, Levi,” you whisper.

He continues on. “And if I had known how you felt, I wouldn’t have upped and left you like that. I was being a shitty coward, for running away and pretending it never happened, and never giving you an explanation when you deserved one. I was scared, I think, of ruining what we already had. You didn’t imagine anything on my part, it happened, and you didn’t do anything wrong that night… I’m sorry.”

Smiling, you squeeze his hands; warm, steady, safe. “You aren’t imagining things on my end either. I’m in love with you, and have been for a while now.” You don’t need him to say those precious words back for now—Levi’s endearingly clumsy attempt at confessing means more to you than he’ll ever know. “And I forgive you for running out on me that night. We both thought it didn’t mean anything to the other person. For so long, I thought that even if you did, things would never work out, that today would be goodbye, because I have a new contract on the other side of the country, and you’ll be going back to stunt work, a-and…” Your voice trembles, so you force yourself to stop, and breathe.

“It will work. I swear it, I’m not saying goodbye to you. I don’t care what’s coming next, we can make it work.” He seems to muster his resolve, tugging you closer. “No more dancing around this like idiots. We have enough lost time to make up for.”

Smiling so widely your cheeks ache, you playfully poke his cheek. “Well, you can always begin with the kiss you owe me, yeah?”

“You smart-arse.” Levi chuckles, before gently cupping the back of your head with his hand. In a swift movement, he leans in and captures your lips with his.

It’s nothing short of divine.

Levi kisses you with years worth of yearning behind it. His other hand moves to cradle your face, thumb brushing against the curve of your cheek, wiping away a stray tear of happiness.

Eyes fluttering shut, you deepen the kiss. Tongues move in tandem, and it isn’t long before hands begin to roam, exploring the terrains of each other’s bodies with an almost innocent curiosity. Heat simmers underneath your skin, a carnal flame yearning to be stoked, to devour.

For now, though, you’ll have to temper it.

Coming up for air, you close your eyes, resting your forehead against his. As much as you desperately want him, you don’t want your first time having sex with Levi to be in a trailer on set, with multiple crew members still milling around outside and packing up for the day. You tell him as such, and he murmurs his agreement after kissing you once more.

“Glad we’re on the same page about that, so…” Realising what you’re about to say next, you choke back a grin at your own cheesiness. “You wanna go back to your place or mine?”

Levi rests his forehead on your shoulder and chokes back a laugh. “Fuck, that’s such a cliché line.”

You roll your eyes good-naturedly. “Yeah, yeah, laugh all you want, but the question still stands.”

He looks up at you, mirth dancing in his eyes. “Yours, then.”

The time spent packing up and driving back to your home crawls by agonisingly slowly. The moment the two of you cross the threshold onto your home, he’s closing the gap between the two of you, kissing you breathless, thoughtless, until only your longing for him remains. So much so that you almost forget to stop and get a condom out from your drawer—in fact, Levi has to remind you.

The rare few times you had allowed yourself to think about it, you’d pictured Levi as a tender lover, gentle despite his coarseness. He is all this and more. At his fingertips, you come alive. As he makes love to you, laughs and sweet nothings fill the air between the deep kisses you share. You should’ve expected just how generous he can be in bed, but it still takes you by surprise, the way he worships your body with a deep-rooted reverence, determined to pleasure you over and over. In turn, you reciprocate eagerly, honoured that Levi trusts you to take care of him in return, that he is so readily vulnerable with you.

Once the two of you are finally, utterly spent, Levi nudges you awake before you can fully slip into a deep doze, cosy and comfortable in his embrace. “Hey. Gotta clean ourselves up, sleepyhead.”

You chuckle drowsily, and miraculously muster up the strength to crawl out of his arms, out of the warm sheets. “The bathroom is just down the hall,” you yawn, trudging towards a cupboard not the other side of your room. “You can shower first whilst I change the sheets and find you a towel and some spare clothes, ‘kay?”

“Or,” Levi says, voice hoarse with the same kind of contented exhaustion that makes you yearn to curl up beneath the sheets in his arms, “you could come with me.” He pulls you back in, peppering gentle kisses along your neck and shoulder, which tickle slightly.

Euphoric, you close your eyes and laugh. “Okay.”

Showering together is an incredibly sweet, domestic affair. Long after you’ve rinsed off all the lather, you’re both hesitant to leave the warmth of the running water, content to cling onto each other and relish in the feeling of skin against skin.

After the two of you dry off and change the sheets, you climb into bed. Half awake and basking in each other’s presence, you pull him close, nestling your head on his chest. When was the last time you had felt so cherished, so happy?

Sleep claims you swiftly, but not before Levi kisses the top of your head and tells you what you already know:

“I’m in love with you, too.”

———

Several weeks later

The wrap party is well underway by the time you and Levi arrive.

The lights are dim, and the music reverberates through your bones. Levi’s hand finds a home in the curve of your waist as he guides you through the crowd of drunken cast and crew members. His touch anchors you, and you find yourself smiling giddily.

After helping yourself to a cocktail, the hours fly by. Apparently, the entire cast plus half of the crew (including all of the makeup assistants under your command) had been rooting for you and Levi to get together. Tonight when you finally revealed you were in a relationship with him to your juniors, you were subjected to an intense barrage of questions. This, however, paled in comparison to Hange’s reaction when Levi held your hand in front of their very eyes—they’d launched an interrogation so brutal you wonder why they didn’t enter law enforcement instead.

Soon after escaping Hange’s interrogation, you two both get another drink. “Everybody seems far too invested in this development than they should be,” you sigh, still frazzled. “How long do you reckon they’ve been shipping us?”

A look of exasperation flits across Levi’s face. “I don’t know, and I hate that I even know what ‘shipping’ means in this context. Also, I saw Zeke give Erwin money when Hange was drilling us. Fuckers had some kind of bet running on us. Don’t even wanna know how long that had gone on for.”

You tip your head back and laugh. “Colour me unsurprised. That sounds very on-brand for Zeke and Erwin. You know, I think I saw Armin and Connie do the same. Guess Armin’s not as angelic as he looks.”

“That’s been known, sweetheart. The kid’s a menace in disguise.” He kisses your cheek. “Just like you, actually, now that I think about it.”

Playfully, you swat him away. “Hey, who are you calling a menace?”

Eventually, the two of you find yourselves catching some air outside, needing a moment to sober up and recalibrate after a whirlwind of social interaction. Levi’s hand returns to your waist and tugs you closer to him, seeking out your warmth. Melting into his touch, you do you best to commit the feeling of his embrace to memory. Soon, you’ll move away for a few months for your next contract, but you no longer fear it. Levi had sworn to you that this would work out, and there is nobody’s word you trust more than his.

Your love for each other has endured for years in the past. A handful more months is nothing.

Levi shifts slightly to get a better look at you, and cups your cheek. Meeting his gaze, your heart stops; his eyes are a breathtaking silver in the moonlight. Easily the most expressive feature he has, you could get lost in them for hours.

Caught in his orbit, your face tilts towards his.

This time, Levi meets you halfway.

Do not repost, modify or claim as your own work.

Masterlist

#levi ackerman #levi ackerman x reader #levi x reader #levi ackerman x you #levi x you #levi ackerman x y/n #levi x y/n #aot x reader #attack on titan x reader #snk x reader #shingeki no kyojin x reader #reader insert #x reader #gender neutral reader #aot actor au #actor levi x makeup artist reader

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ohsalome · 1 year

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Today is a 37st anniversary of the Chornobyl Nuclear Plant disaster. It's hard to talk about one unprocessed national tragedy while living through another.

The Chornobyl disaster was totally preventable and it took away countless lives of people living in the region, especially in Ukraine and Belarus - both the liquidators and the civillians. Despite the very air and dust being literal poison, the soviets had not only hid this information from the people, but forced everybody to partake in the May the 1st parade - because god forbid we lose our face before the international community as a working class paradise! If not for the nuclear scientists in Sweden who raised the alarm about the dangerous levels of nuclear particles coming from northern Ukraine, who knows what would have happened. It definitely would have been swepped under the rug and forgotten by the international community, together with its victims - just like Semipalatinsk in Kazakhstan is barely known abroad.

With russia constantly threatening to turn Zaporhizhzha nuclear plant into second Chornobyl, the wound caused by this tragedy is cut open again.

We all love the HBO Chornobyl series, and I genuinely am grateful to Craig Mazin for the amount of empathy and respect he brought to the series; but for today I indulge you to watch something made by ukrainians, to try to understand what this tragedy means to us and how it influences our lives even today.

For the documentaries, my favourite series by this day remains the "Dragons live here" by Your Underground Humanitarian School Youtube channel, which, unfortunately, can only offer automated english subtitles - they should, however, be sufficient.

youtube

As for the feature films, I recommend "Gateway" (you can stream it online with english subtitles here). And here is the official english trailer:

youtube

#chornobyl #chernobyl #чорнобиль #ukraine #nuclear disaster #nuclear plant #Youtube

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wynnyfryd · 4 months

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Trailer park Steve AU part 41

part 1 | part 40 | ao3

FUCKING. FINALLY. welcome back and happy new year babies! cw: this is just porn. D/s vibes but nothing formally discussed. smidge of subspace, mild to moderate pain play, oops! all nipple play. minors i will spray you with bear mace i swear to god

The hand under his shirt moves higher up, fingertips skimming his sternum, weaving through his chest hair; tugging, just a little. “Good?” Eddie checks. His voice is light, relaxed and conversational like he isn't driving Steve crazy, working his fingers in maddening little circles that make Steve's lungs forget how to work.

Steve goes to say yeah, but then Eddie pinches his left nipple and all that comes out is: “Fuck.” Quietly gasped at the ceiling, panting when Eddie doesn't let go.

No one's ever touched him there before.

Not on purpose; not like this.

Eddie's fingers are fucking jumper cables; he rolls the stiffening nub between his forefinger and thumb, and electricity bursts from the point of contact down the length of Steve's whole spine — settles in the small of his back and makes him lurch off the floor with a wordless groan.

"God," Eddie breathes, rolling his hips against Steve's thigh. Slow and filthy and hard, painting a wet spot on his sweats. Steve can feel it against his leg, the tiniest little dot blooming at the tip; knows that if he looked down he'd see it spreading dark and damp. God. God.

Eddie shoves Steve's shirt up under his arms and chases his fingers with his tongue. Licks the battery; makes Steve jolt. "Knew you'd be like this," he says, searing eye contact as he dips to swirl the pointed tip of his tongue against the peak. He blows a stream of cool air until Steve squirms underneath him, then crawls up to press his lips to the lobe of Steve's ear, breath hot against him as his tongue flicks out to taste. "Knew you’d be sensitive here, too." His fingers play with the skin he left pebbled and spit-slick. "You’re so responsive, aren’t you?”

Shame or something like it scorches Steve’s cheeks like a brand, and he curls up to hide in the crook of Eddie’s neck. Squeezes his eyes shut, focuses on hot skin and fine stubble. Warm. Safe.

"Sorry," Eddie chuckles in his ear. “Too much?”

Steve shakes his head. Doesn't want to hear the word 'sorry' right now; thinks it sounds weird in Eddie's mouth. Thinks it has no business here.

Eddie rocks his hips against him. “Gonna tell me if it is?”

Steve nods mutely, curling in tighter and rolling his forehead over Eddie’s collarbone, the fabric soft against his nose.

"Gonna tell me with your words?” Eddie teases, voice low.

Steve tries; he tries, okay? But all that comes out is another weak moan, a reedy whimper high in his throat, and he can't uncurl himself; can't shake the flood of nerves or shame or— he doesn't know what. Doesn't understand what's happening: why he's rolled up like a pill bug, why he's shaking like a leaf, making all these pathetic, needy noises like some wound-up nervous virgin, but Eddie's hard against him, and his rings are tickling his ribs, and he can't fucking stop now; can't find his words, can't work his tongue.

Eddie fists his free hand in the hair at Steve's nape, pulls him out of hiding and looks at him with narrowed eyes.

It's mean. It's hot. Steve wants to stare without blinking; desperately wants to look away.

Eddie's tongue runs over his lip, considering and almost rude, like tsk, tsk, tsk; whatever will we do with you? and then he twists Steve's nipple hard.

“F-fu—!” Steve stutters, whimpering in shock. Eddie pinches harder, eyes narrowing to slits, and it hurts; it fucking hurts, but it snaps him out of it. Whatever it was. “Yes!” he gasps, hips bucking without thought.

"Ah," Eddie bites back a pleased grin, "so you do know how to answer me. That's good." He shifts his weight onto his elbow and gives Steve's abused nipple a sharp flick, asking in a bored tone, "Yes what, baby boy?"

Holy shit; holy shit. Steve couldn't possibly remember now. “Yes," he babbles, guessing, "I'll— I'll do it; do whatever, just— fuck. Eddie. Eddie, please.”

“Close enough," Eddie relents. Smiling wide, teeth sunk into his bottom lip; sadistic fucker's loving this. He gives Steve's nipple a soothing pat (or rather, a pat that would be soothing if his skin wasn't still stinging from the vicious treatment a second ago), and says, "I’ll be nice this time.”

Steve gawks at him. Lifts up on his elbows so he can do it properly. “That was you being nice?”

"Sure was." He sighs a happy hum and gives another languid thrust, cock flexing on Steve's thigh, and a pulse thuds between their bodies. Steve can't tell whose pulse it is, whose blood is singing in whose veins. Eddie taught him something once about resonant frequency — symphonies of synchrony, he said, or something like it; all wistful and blissed out on the tail end of a joint — and Eddie kisses him now and when he bends to nip his Adam's apple, Steve feels the murmured words reverberate inside his throat. “You wanna see me get a little mean?”

—

part 42

tag list in separate reblogs under '#trailer park steve au taglist' if you'd like to filter that content. if you want to be added please comment and let me know (must be over 21; please either verify in the comment or have your age visible on your blog)

#trailer park steve au #steddie #steddie fic #steve harrington #eddie munson #my writing #my fic #ah fuck it i don’t feel like getting up early to do the tag list happy midnight smut time

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steddiealltheway · 1 year

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It happens after a visit at the Mayfield trailer. Eddie comes up with a wonderful plan to prank Steve: He’ll announce that he’s going back to his trailer but actually sneak and hide in the back seat of Steve’s BMW - he had stolen the keys earlier and secretly unlocked it.

So, when he sees Steve starting to wrap things up so the kids can spend time together, Eddie makes the announcement that he’s leaving, and gives Max a squeeze on the shoulder on the way out. He’s giddy with excitement as he climbs into the backseat and hunches down. He holds his breath after he hears Steve yell at everyone to take care from the front of the trailer.

The car door opens and closes, and Eddie waits a moment before he jumps out, letting Steve really settle into the comfort of his car. Instead, Steve mumbles under his breath, “Okay, Harrington, hold it together. Kids are watching.”

Eddie hears him start the car and feels him reversing back then taking off quickly. There’s a click and then a cassette starts playing which Steve starts singing along to. It would be endearing if his voice wasn’t so tight, sounding like he’s struggling to hold back tears.

Eddie doesn’t know what to do as he hears the first song end. Steve says to himself, “Use her as the fucking bait… and you just let it happen!” There’s a loud noise that Eddie thinks is the smack of a hand on the steering wheel.

He curls further into himself as the next song plays. It’s one of those playlist that he knows he would make fun of Steve for if he wasn’t practically choking out the lyrics. After a loud sob, there’s a deep breath and then a stern, “Steve Harrington doesn’t fucking cry. Steve Harrington doesn’t fucking-” it’s broken off with another sob.

Then the car is suddenly coming to a stop, and the car is filled with whatever pop song Steve has playing and the sounds of Steve Harrington gasping for breath as he lectures himself about not crying. It’s fucking devastating, but Eddie knows Steve would never forgive him if he revealed himself now.

“She might never fucking walk again you fucking idiot,” Steve says then there’s another loud smack. “You were supposed to take care of them,” Steve says voice cracking awfully. Eddie hand flies up to his mouth as he chokes back a sob. He doesn’t know when he started crying.

“I need air,” Steve announces suddenly with a gasp and then the car door is opening and slamming shut. Eddie takes a moment to debate his choices. He can attempt to hurry away although he didn’t pay any attention to where Steve was driving. Or he can keep hiding in the car and risk Steve finding him during the rest of his breakdown.

Eddie tries the door handle and slowly climbs out the back. He turns to find Steve standing off the side of some back road, hands on his hips, and face staring up at the sky. One hand rises up to pinch at his nose as tears fall down his red face. He looks like he’s trying as hard as he can to not let this take over him, and Eddie can hear him still lecturing himself.

Eddie can’t stand the sight. And he can’t leave. Maybe Steve will hate him forever for intruding, but Eddie can’t let him go through this alone. He lets the back door of the car shut firmly. Steve whips his head to the side, eyes wide in shock but red rimmed and filled with tears.

He reaches up and angrily wipes away the tears. “What the fuck are you doing here?” Steve asks. Eddie just slowly approaches him as if he were a wild animal. “Were you fucking hiding in my car?!” Steve yells.

Eddie’s just glad that his anger is directed at someone other than himself. “Fucking answer me, Munson!” Steve yells again, tears still streaming down his face which he wipes at again. Eddie doesn’t answer but slowly gets closer.

“Get the fuck away from me freak.” Eddie lets the insult roll off him as best as he can as he finally gets into Steve’s space. “Go away,” Steve whispers desperately. His words betray him as Steve doesn’t attempt to move back.

Eddie lifts his arms up and pulls Steve into a hug. He tenses up immediately. “It’s okay. I’ve got you,” Eddie says, and Steve finally gives in. He sobs into his neck, nearly close to hyperventilating as Eddie runs a hand through his hair. “I’ve got you, okay? I’ve got you,” Eddie repeats again and again as Steve loudly sobs.

“It-it’s my fault,” Steve says finally catching his breath, voice all twisted up in agony that makes Eddie choke out a sob.

“It’s not your fault, Steve,” Eddie says, trying to hold back his own tears.

“I could’ve stopped it. I should’ve stopped it,” Steve says weakly pounding his fist on Eddie’s chest.

Eddie’s hands comes up to intertwine his fingers in Steve’s, making him release the fist. “We all could’ve stopped it. We’re all at fault here. The weight of the world and the fate of these kids doesn’t need to fall on you. You can’t always save everyone, but you did.” Eddie feels Steve’s grip tighten on him as he continues, “She could’ve died, but she didn’t. She might be in that wheelchair for a long time, but she’s alive. Hell, she’s even back more of an attitude when I didn’t think it was possible.” Steve lightly laughs at the remark which makes Eddie’s hold on him tighten even further.

A few moments later, Steve’s breath begins to even out enough that Eddie decides he can loosen his grip on him. He takes the moment to pull Steve slightly away so he can cup his face in his hands. His eyes are swollen and there are still tears streaming down his red face. His bottom lip is quivering no matter how hard he’s trying to press his lips together. And there’s definitely snot and tears getting mixed under his nose. It’s an ugly cry, but Eddie thinks Steve looks beautiful.

“You saved me, too,” Eddie reminds Steve. “You saved us all.”

Steve’s watery eyes search Eddie’s before he’s slowly nodding, finally accepting that maybe he isn’t entirely at fault for everything that’s happened, and maybe he even caused some good.

Eddie kisses him on the forehead and pulls him back into a hug. “You can cry, too, you know. As much as you need to because I’ve got you. I’ll be here forever if you need me to be,” Eddie says softly.

“Promise?” Steve says quietly.

“Promise,” Eddie says, tugging Steve closer on the side of the road, feeling the dampness on his shirt grow as Steve finally lets go.

#steddie #eddie munson #steve harrington #steddie ficlet #let steve cry #stranger things

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helloitstsyu · 9 months

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i got you | Tom Cruise

My masterlist

Fluff, kind of an angst too, i guess. Requested by @grantaires-waistcoat I'm so sorry this takes so long. Hope you like it🤍

Tom Cruise x young!costar!reader

Summary : Set to film a stunt, you had a panic attack, and Tom helps you to get through it.

Warning : this might be triggering for some, so beware. panic!attack, swear words.

BUM. BUM. BUM.

"Y/N?... Y/N!" Stella keeps banging the door.

The banging is on the door yet you feel it thumping on your heart. You feel your breath is short and heavy. Your head spinning, sweats dripping on your temples as your chest heaves. Cold water running on your terribly shaking hand, trying to calm yourself, you keep repeating to your reflection on the small mirror.

"It's nothing. You can do this. You've prepared. You can do this."

You look at yourself in the mirror. Your face is pale. You're completely terrified. You're about to hang yourself off a cliff. Yes, you've rehearse a lot. But this is no Rockreaction in Los Angeles. There's no mattress at the bottom. There's no safety net going to catch you if you fall. This is rocky mountainside in Utah. The only thing that'll determine your life and death is the harness that'll be attached on you. One snap of the line, you're gone.

"Arrghh!" You grunt all frustratingly to yourself. "The fuck is wrong with you. Why do i even agreed to this!"

You're a newcomer. You've only done a couple of family drama for some TV station and a thriller movie for a streaming site. There's a couple of stunt for the thriller, but no stunt like Mission Impossible. This is a damn blockbuster, well produced franchise. And the fact that you're here locking yourself inside of a bathroom, being a chicken, while everyone else is ready to shoot the scene is just enhancing your stress for the moment.

"Y/N! What the hell are you doing in there?! Come on, we don't get all day!" Stella, the assistant director keeps banging on your door.

"Coming!" You shout.

Wiping your sweaty forehead, you hope the cold water could cover the spook on your face.

Coming out of the bathroom, you're surprised to find your leading man and boss is on the front of the door. Tom looks at you deeply, reading your face.

"You okay, kid?" Tom asks.

You nod, hiding your nerve all that you can. Going outside of the trailer. Stella brought you to the edge of the cliff, where's the stunt team will prepare you with the safety harness and all. Looking all around you the crew is all busy and occupied with their own stuff. Everyone seems to move so fast but yet also somehow so slow.

Tom comes to you, with a wide grin on his face, "Ready to be a spiderman, kid?" He asks with both of his hands on his hips.

You barely hear what he said, high-pitched sound is ringing in your ear covering what he has to say. Despite the breezy wind blowing around, you feel like you couldn't get an air to your lungs. Eyeing the edge of the cliff, the ground below is not even to your eye reach. You can feel your heartbeating right to your head.

"Kid... you're here?... you okay?" Tom starts to notice you're not doing alright.

Slowly, your eyes are back to Tom's. He worries. "Y/N?" He steps closer to you. And there you finally breaks, in a beat, your legs falls limp as if they didn't work. You fall but Tom's quick to catch you before the impact. You're panting hard, your chest burns. Tears blocking your eyesight. High-pitched sound ringing loudly in your ear, completely blocking everything else. All you see is so bright. The sun behind Tom's face is so bright like it pierces your eyes.

"Y/N... Y/N... look at me, look at me." Tom holds you close.

"I'm right here. It's okay, it's going to be okay.. I'm right here." You hold onto his hand, grasping them in between your two much smaller palm.

"Breathe, come on, breathe with me, kid." Tom calmly tells you, like he knows exactly what to do to help you. He takes your hand and put it to your chest. The other one he brings to his chest. "Breathe.. come on, slowly..."

You can feel your heart pounding in your hand. Yours beat like a marching band while his is set in a calm pace, like a rhythm. You follow his instructions, taking a deep breath slowly, one at a time. Tom nods. "There you go, that's my girl. Come on, one more time," he encourages.

And so you do as he tells, following his lead, you take a deep inhale and slowly exhaling. Once he manage to get you calmer, he takes you back inside the trailer.

Setting you to sit on the couch, he kneels in front of you.

When the panic attack is gone, now you feel the burning tears making its way to flood out. One look of those soft emerald eyes and you can't bear the guilt to get the best of you.

"I--- " you struggle to say it out loud. I'm sorry, is what you want to say. But without you have to say it, Tom knows. Tom understands. More than anyone else, he understands.

"It's okay.." Tom holds your hand.

Though the watergate has opened. Tom quickly wipes your tears away. "It's okay, you don't have to do it. It's alright."

What he said only makes it worse. You're sobbing right in front of the man, tears running like a waterfall. "I'm sorry.. i can't– i can't do it.." you cry. "I don't know what's wrong with me,"

"Oh, sweetheart," Tom sits next to you and pulls you to his chest. He wraps his hand protectively around you. "Nothing is wrong with you. You don't have to be sorry. It's okay, you don't have to do it."

Tom strokes your hair. Caressing you ever so gently, comforting you in the best way possible.

"It's okay... you'll be okay... I got you, babygirl," he whispers.

#tom cruise #tom cruise x reader #tom cruise fanfiction #pete maverick mitchell #tom cruise smut #tom cruise x female reader #pete mitchell x reader #tom cruise fic #top gun maverick #ethan hunt x reader #ethan hunt #ethan hunt fic #daddy x reader

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kinnporscherewatch · 9 months

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KinnPorsche La Forte Rewatch Event 2023

It's been over 1 year since KinnPorsche aired, so if you miss it, want to experience it again with other people or watch it for the first time, join us for a collective rewatch! Don't know what KinnPorsche is? Check this trailer out and consider watching the whole show about romance between a mafia boss and his bodyguard. It has gays, pretty men, crime, murder, sex, some insane crack, bread ads, wattpad y/n fan meets idol romance is there, ball frying happens and many more fun things!

Schedule: August 1st to August 16th

Time: no particular time limits, as long as it's the specific episode's assigned day in your time zone, watch it! If you can't watch that day, don't worry, catch up in the next few days! This event's organisers will be watching at 20:00 Bangkok time (GMT+7), if you want to follow our time.

Streaming On: iQIYI with subscription (or any other way you can, but check that you are watching the uncut version)

How To Participate: — Rewatch episodes — Liveblog your rewatch — Create content: gifs, art, meta, memes, fics, shitposts, fanvideos and anything else you can think of — Reblog posts by other participants — Tag your liveblogging and content with #kprewatch2023 so we can reblog them

Day by Day Schedule: Aug 1 ep. 1 Aug 2 ep. 2 Aug 3 ep. 3 Aug 4 ep. 4, Vegas trailer Aug 5 ep. 5, Kinn/Porsche trailer Aug 6 ep. 6 Aug 7 rest/catching up Aug 8 sidestory, ep. 7 Aug 9 ep. 8 Aug 10 ep. 9 Aug 11 rest/catching up Aug 12 ep. 10 Aug 13 ep. 11, VegasPete trailer Aug 14 ep. 12 Aug 15 ep. 13, WDYS m/v, Pete trailer Aug 16 ep. 14

Reblog this post if you can so that more people know they can join ❤️‍🔥🍞🔪⛓🎸🏳️‍🌈 Messages and asks are open for questions and suggestions!

#kprewatch2023 #kinnporsche #kinn x porsche #kinnporsche the series #kpts #vegaspete #kimchay #kinnporschesource #info

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klausinamarink · 3 months

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The Only Sounds Are His Heart and Music

rating: T | cw: mentions of Vecna nightmares and near-death experience | wc: 893 | tags: established relationship, canon divergence, hurt/comfort | prompt: Love is the perfect mixtape/Love is the heartbeat I can feel when I hug him

written for @steddielovemonth

Heavy silence filled the trailer, not even the barking of the neighbours' dogs or the rattling winds dared to break inside. It was as if all sounds from the outside world had been snuffed out, putting the residents into a solitary confinement room. It would've been unnerving if the Steve wasn't pressing his ear against Eddie's chest where his heart thudded loudly.

Ba-bump. Ba-bump.

Eddie was still alive.

Steve swallowed another lump down his throat, wincing slightly as he did. When Eddie had gone white-eyed and later floated in the air, Steve screamed so loud out he nearly shredded his throat. He had no idea how much it hurt to speak until after the music worked and Wayne Munson demanded an explanation for his nephew's apparent possession that when Steve had tried to explain, barely a wheezing sob came out. Dustin and the other kids had taken over as storytellers of the Upside Down while Steve held a heaving Eddie in his hold.

Eddie was breathing normally now as if he was sleeping. But Steve knew from his tense body that Eddie was still wide awake. His fingers kept twitching from squeezing Steve's biceps to twisting the wires of his headphones where Dio's Hungry For Heaven blared out to gripping the blankets around them. It was close to his usual manic energy but more subdued. Terrified as if everything he touched was even real.

Whoever the hell this Vecna guy was, Steve was ready bash his brains out with his nail bat.

Ba-bump. Ba-bump. Ba-babump.

Eddie's heartbeat stayed the same but Steve caught the moment it started to quicken. Steve squeezed his arms around Eddie's torso and nuzzled his face against the chest. He wanted to kiss his boyfriend so badly but Steve couldn't bare to let go and let the sound of his heart vanish from his functional ear.

He felt Eddie shuddering out a breath before his arms began to wrap around Steve's shoulders. Eddie sniffed and pressed his face on the top of Steve's head.

Nestled between them, Hungry For Heaven faded away but the Walkman kept whirring. And then, very clearly, Eddie My Love by The Chordettes started playing.

Steve blinked down at the Walkman with a mix of confusion and bubbling fear. He knew that Lucas was the one who managed to snagged the right tape to save Eddie during the panic, but for a terrifying moment, he wondered if Lucas made a mistake. "What the-"

He looked up when he heard Eddie snorting. For the first time since he had safely fell back to the ground, Eddie was cracking a smile. "I thought Vecna was going to snatch me again when that played after Dio. Turns out that it's my second favourite song." He lifted the Walkman up to the streams of the moonlight so Steve could peer closely at the cassette's label. His heart leapt up to his throat when he recognized the tiny heart doodles over his own handwriting.

Eddie's VERY METAL Mixtape

The whoosh of air escaping Steve's lips might've been a sigh or some poor attempt of a laugh. Either way, relief flowed from him, top to bottom. He dropped his head onto Eddie's chest again, almost headbutting the chin. "Jesus" he murmurs soft enough that it doesn't agitate his throat, "we should give Sinclair a fruit basket."

"A truck full of them. Freshly produced from sweet Alabama." Eddie adds cheekily.

They chuckle together before falling back to silence, barely accompanied by the faint vocals.

Ba-bump. Ba-bump.

Steve waits for another minute before he breaks it with a quiet question, "Are you okay, Eds?"

It's a stupid question, but Steve just wanted to hear his honesty. No person can handle the massive guilt of letting Chrissy Cunningham go home after a little freakout over the drug she wanted, only for her body to be broken beyond recognition by an unseen force in front of her parents, or be tormented alone by painful headaches and nightmares before nearly dying, or the sudden revelation that your secret boyfriend and his little gaggle of kids have been fighting monsters of an alternate dimension for years.

Eddie gave out a drawn-out sigh before he answers, "Not really. Feeling like shit but I can't sleep."

The Chordettes come to a sweet end before being inappropriately followed up by Black Sabbath's Die Young. It made Steve shrivel on the inside. He wished he could pummel his past self for including that song in the tape. But if Eddie was bothered, he didn't show it. Still-

"You're going to fine." Steve whispers harshly. His face is close up to Eddie now, his hand pressing against the other man's heart. "As long as you keep listening to our tape, we're gonna figure out to kick Vecna's ass. You will live."

Ba-bump. Ba-bump.

Eddie's eyes glistened. Steve flipped the both of them over, careful not to crush the Walkman, allowing Eddie much more room to crawl further up and bury himself into Steve's tight embrace. Eddie's face pressed into Steve's neck, already soaking his skin with tears. It doesn't bother Steve at all. His hands rubbed his boyfriend's back in smoothing circles. Steve brought his mouth to Eddie's temple first before moving to his ear, quietly repeating "you will live" over and over.

Steve prayed for it to be true.

Ba-bump. Ba-bump.

#klaus writes #steddie #stranger things #steddielovemonth

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luveline · 2 years

Note

eddie blurb? you wake up sad and sweaty from a nightmare and he isnt there (he’s legit just outside smokin but the reader is scared as shit and whatnot) feel free to ignore this lol

im obsessed with soft comforting eddie ty for requesting!

1k words gn!reader tw nightmares about dying/death

The seconds that it takes you to realise where you are are almost as scary as the nightmare itself, though by the time you come around you have no clue what the nightmare was, the only evidence of its happening is a layer of clammy sweat on your skin, your racing heart, and the twin streams of tears down the sides of your face.

What was the nightmare about? You try to remember. Hurting, a loss, grief. Somebody had been missing. Somebody… but who? Pale skin, dark brown eyes, a pretty nose. A mouth shaped by kisses.

Eddie. Eddie had been missing. You can't remember the details and you aren't sure you want to, but you think that the nightmare had been about losing Eddie.

And… where is he?

You feel his side of the bed and find it cold. The window of his bedroom is closed to stave off the growing winter chill and the layer of blankets over you is thick. Your boyfriend usually acts as a space heater. The cold sheets can't be a good sign.

He must be gone.

You bite your lip hard by accident and jolt, pushing the suffocating layer of blankets off of your sweaty body and staggering onto dead legs, dizzy and disoriented. Your shirt and pajama trousers are damp with moisture.

You almost trip over discarded clothes – yours and his – on your way to the door, creeping cautiously past Eddie's Uncle Wayne sleeping on the sofa bed and through the dark living room. The trailer home doesn't retain much heat and the floor is freezing even through your socks.

You see what you hope to see. The door cracked open. Still, the nightmare plays on your mind. He'd been missing, something had happened to him. You'd woken up just as something was going to happen to you, you realise. Suddenly the dark is terrifying. You rush the last few feet to the porch and push it open, and there Eddie is in his pajamas, a cigarette hanging between his lips, his notebook in hand.

He quickly sets the notebook aside when he sees you and takes a drag of his cigarette before pulling it away. Smoke streams between his fingers. "Hey, shortcake," he says quietly, flicking ash into the ashtray by his thigh. "I'm coming back in. Two seconds."

You don't have time to speak as you drop to your knees and wrap your arms around him.

He flinches. "Uh tu tu, babe! I'll burn you."

"Eddie," you say tearfully. "I was so scared."

You don't mean to admit the last part, but it's true. You'd never felt a dread that pervasive in your life. Even now it sticks around, your limbs lead with its weight.

"What?" he asks, horrified.

You sniffle and dig your head into his chest as he wraps one of his arms around you, the soft material of a zip up hoodie he'd thrown on pressed to your clammy clothes.

"You were scared? What happened?"

You can't say it out loud. You need a minute.

Eddie waits patiently. You listen as he blows smoke out of the corner of his mouth and snuffs out the cigarette butt, his second arm coming to wrap around you. You've basically collapsed into his arms, your face slipping down so that it's almost at his stomach.

"Sweetheart?" he asks.

"I had a bad dream," you admit, embarrassed but so relieved, soaking in his warmth as the cold air threatens to freeze you on the spot like two human icicles.

He pets your shoulders. "Yeah? What happened."

"You were gone." Your voice cracks. "I can't remember the rest."

"Hey. It's okay," he murmurs.

"Sorry, I know it's stupid."

Eddie tsks and needles his arms under yours to drag you up the length of his chest, pulling you close. Your face locks into place over his trap muscle like a jigsaw piece, like it has a hundred times before.

"It's not stupid."

You wiggle your face into his neck, needing to be closer than close.

"Sorry I wasn't there when you woke up," he says.

"It's okay," you whisper.

Eddie starts to sway you gently from one side to the other, hands working roughly up and down your back in an attempt to warm you up. It works. His hands feel like brands in the cold.

You hide your own hands in the soft mess of his dark curls, pulling a handful to your face to breathe in. He smells like he usually smells, the sweet, heavy smell of a bruised apple. The heady hints of cologne from the day before. The cloying whispers of cigarette smoke.

"We should go inside. It's cold out here," Eddie says.

"I'm so glad you're okay."

He takes your neck into his hands and guides you back, sliding his palms slowly upwards. Heat seeps into your jaw, your cheeks.

He meets your gaze. "Of course I'm okay. It was just a dream. Just a dream, baby. We're both okay."

You stare at his chin, sheepish. "I know. It felt… it felt so real. I woke up and you felt gone. I can't explain it."

"I can imagine it."

"Yeah?" you ask, bringing your eyes up back to his. He's a mixture of concerned and empathetic. A hint of sadness.

"Yeah, I think so. I don't ever want to know how it would feel to lose you."

You sniffle and he clocks your teary eyes. He pinches your wet nose between his fingers gently, then drags the tip of his index finger under your heavy lashes.

"Let's go back to bed," he says firmly.

You nod and let him lead you into the trailer, through the cold living room and back to the sanctuary of his bed. He doesn't complain when you climb on top of him though it can't be comfortable, your thighs between his and your arms wrapped around his neck.

In fact, he smiles. "I like how you feel on top of me. Your weight."

You smile back shyly. "Push me off if I get too heavy."

"Never," he whispers through his grin.

#eddie munson x reader fluff #eddie munson x y/n #eddie munson x reader #eddie munson x you #eddie munson #eddie munson x reader blurb #eddie munson x reader fanfic #stranger things fic #stranger things 4 #stranger things x reader #stranger things #x reader

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ghostboneswrites2 · 2 months

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Under the Stars || One Shot

New account! @ghostbones was banned! Transferring all my work here slowly!

Anon request from my old blog: "can i ask a tinnyyy request like you know s7 e8 daryl runs off from negans with jesus to hilltop later ricks group comes. How about reader and daryl reuniting after them not seeing eachother since negan takes him hostage and like all the time they spent away from each other in pain they try to make up for it"

Summary: Your mental health severely declined when Daryl was taken, but now he's back, and it's time to begin to heal together.

18+ MDNI || WARNINGS: depression, prescription medication, general unhappiness, but a happy ending (oh, and profanity, duh)

You had barely taken care of yourself over these last weeks. Minimal food intake, drinking water only when your body painfully begged for hydration, unable to get out of bed to even bathe on most days as the painful sinking in your gut was just too much. You felt dizzy sometimes, either from malnourishment or grief. Two of your friends were murdered in cold blood, horrifically. You still remembered how it felt when Abraham's blood splattered over your face, warm in contrast to the chill of the air around you. You could remember the way your breath made foggy little clouds in the bright lights, how you felt every ounce of air leave your lungs when Glenn was taken out next.

That man -- that monster -- he took more than just your friends. He took your sanity. You didn't sleep because when you closed your eyes it was all you could see. You hummed to yourself for hours because in the silence, you could still hear the whistle of the bat as it was brought down on your family members and the squelching of mangled skulls as he turned them into mere pulp.

With all that, the thing that stung even more was the memory of him being dragged away, your best friend, your love. The toughest and strongest man you knew, the one with a dirty abrasive exterior and a sparkling core of gold. They took him away, just like that. You knew he was alive. They brought him once, just to flaunt him in your face and remind you of what they had taken from you. To show you just how miserable they were making him.

On this day, though, Rick and the others had dragged you out of bed. Michonne sat with you while you showered, and washed your hair for you while you sat curled up under the steamy stream of water. She helped you get dressed, and told you they were taking you with them to Hilltop to see Harlan, their doctor. He would be able to give you a mild antidepressant, and something to help you sleep again. They had other business at the colony, but they decided you'd benefit from tagging along.

You were reluctant, of course. Why did you deserve peace and rest if nobody you loved could attain the same? But, they insisted, and who were you to argue when they already had more pressing matters at hand. You all did.

"This is setraline, or more commonly known as Zoloft. It can be used for anxiety and depression, and it isn't known to have many side effects. I'm going to give you a 30 day supply. Just take one every morning with breakfast, and it should help you break out of this funk." Harlan explained, handing you a pill bottle. "It wont take away the grief, but it will help balance some of the symptoms of it until you can cope on your own."

"This one," he continued, handing you a little baggie with ten pills. "Is a basic valium. Take it every night with a snack, you'll get your sleep schedule back on track by the time you run out of them."

He offered you a thin lipped smile as you stuffed the medications in your bag.

"Thanks, Doc." You sighed as you stood up. He held the door open and allowed you to exit the medical trailer before himself, shutting the door behind him.

"Don't thank me just yet. I want to see you again in 30 days. We can assess how it worked for you and then maybe you can thank me."

The others were all gathered nearby the gates, talking with Maggie and some others. You made your way over. Michonne smiled kindly as she placed an arm over your shoulders.

"Was he able to help?" Rick asked. You nodded.

"We'll see in 30 days." You told them. The conversation resumed where it left off, and you kind of just absentmindedly stood by, allowing little bits of information to register here and there but not enough to follow.

That was when the gates opened and Jesus walked in, followed by someone you didn't expect in the slightest. Your eyes were dry and wide, throat tight, heart racing out of your chest. Rick was the first to hug him, then Michonne, then Maggie, who he seemed shocked to see.

His eyes landed on you and time stopped. The world simply stopped spinning. He stepped toward you slowly, each crash of his boot into the dirt sounding off like bombs. Tears pooled in your eyes when you could finally reach him hear him, smell him.

"Daryl." You choked.

He didn't say a word, but he didn't have to. The way he embraced you and lifted your feet from the ground, squeezing the air out of you was enough. When he set you back down he planted a kiss on your forehead, lingering there as he breathed you in.

----

The stars had never looked so bright than they did when you were underneath them with Daryl that night. You stayed at Hilltop with him, and instead of enjoying a bed and warm sheets, you both laid on the ground outside Barrington House, breathing easily for the first time since he had been taken.

"How'd you get out?" You wondered.

"Nah. Don't gotta talk 'bout that right now." He said softly, sneaking an arm under you to pull you into him. You rested your head on his chest and he ran his fingers though your hair.

"Okay." You whispered. "I missed you."

"Yeah." He agreed. "Me too. I missed ya."

"I haven't been able to sleep without you."

"Mm." He nodded, fingers still twirling in your strands.

"Can you talk? About anything? I missed your voice."

"Well," he sucked in a breath, searching for something worth telling you. "Every minute I spent away from you just felt longer and longer, ya know? 'N' now that I got ya back I don't wanna think about none of it. Don't wanna think 'bout the fightin' that's comin'.. Just wanna be here. With you."

You sniffled and blinked back tears as you nuzzled closer to him, wishing he could just absorb you into his very being so that you'd never be apart.

You peeked up at him through your eyelashes and he looked down at you, pressing a scratchy kiss on the top of your head.

"I thought about you every minute of every day." You admitted.

"I know." He said softly.

"I just.." You sighed. "I'm just so happy to be here with you. It feels like a dream."

"It ain't."

"But it feels like one." You countered. "Just so unreal."

"It's real." He affirmed.

"I know."

"Good."

"Do you wanna sleep inside tonight?" You asked.

"Nah. Too closed up."

"Okay." You smiled. You snaked an arm over his torso, holding him tightly. He returned the gesture, using dropping his hand from your hair down to your back and pushing you against him. You laid a leg over his.

"Ya been eatin'?" He asked suddenly, running his fingers over your ribcage.

"No." You admitted quietly.

"Gon' eat breakfast tomorrow." He instructed.

"I have to anyways. Harlan said I have to take my meds with food."

"Meds? For what?"

"Depression." You huffed, sitting up and reaching into your bag to show him the pills. "Zoloft and some kind of valium."

"Pfft." He scoffed, taking the pills from you and setting them on top of his own bag as he pulled you back down. You settled back into your previous position. "Don't need no damn drugs. I'm gon' give these back to him tomorrow."

"I guess they were just worried about me. I wasn't really that great, you know, with everything..." You trailed off.

"Okay." He nodded. "I'm here now. Ya don't need 'em."

"Okay." You said sleepily, eyes feeling heavy in the comfort of his embrace. You really didn't need valium, you just needed him to lay with you. He glanced down at you, feeling a bit of warmth in his chest as your eyes began to flutter.

"Get some sleep, now." He whispered.

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