#What if he didnt remember everything that happened in the house and is always tired? | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

dezznuggz · 2 months

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The Parents of the Friend group. |Part 1

Steve Harrington × reader

~the party already knows about yours and Steve's relationship and even before you and Steve got together, they made it pretty clear that Steve is the mom and you're the dad. Plain and simple

Warning: playfully bullying Steve, mentions of season 2, mentions of the upside down, reader pronouns she/her, y/n used a couple times

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With everything that the party member went through at a young age, you and Steve always cared and protected them with any chance y'all get. With that being said, Steve made it a monthly thing to have the kids (including Robin and Eddie) sleepover for at least a night just so they can enjoy themselves young and to also ease Steve's paranoia of not knowing when another type of monster will appear out of the blue. You didn't have a problem with the idea of course mostly since you loved the kids as if they were your own kids but it gets tiring after a while, mostly when it's in your own home.

Tossing and turning in bed while hearing loud chatters in the distance. Moving around to grab a hold of Steve and hopefully cuddle back to sleep but you feel the other side of the bed empty.

Is it the 24th already?

Groggily getting out of bed still half asleep and walking to the bathroom to freshen up and get ready for one hell of a day. After wearing something more appropriate and becoming wide awake, you mentally prepare yourself to walk out into the chaos. When you open the door, everything suddenly becomes clearer and louder. You see Erica and Dustin arguing about what channel to put on. Max and Robin are practically attacking Lucas for his poor taste in comics. Eddie, Mike, and Will try explaining d&d to El (who clearly is not interested). Then you see the main person that you wanted to spend your morning with, but they were clearly occupied and busy. Already heading to the kitchen to your lover to say good morning while giving a peck on the lips.

"Every month...every month, I don't even know why I'm surprised anymore" you say while looking at the hoard of people in the living room talking over each other. "I swear they're little geniuses but when it comes to being on time, they're rather late or too early and today is one of those days." Steve says while mixing a bowl of pancakes batter. "Remember you wanted this, so you can't fully blame them." You say while warming up a cup of coffee, "oh no no no, you can't partially blame me for this, don't act as if you didnt want them around either" Steve says while looking from the pancake batter then to you with a small smile. Okay maybe you also found comfort in having the kids around including Robin and Eddie, it feels more home warming but it's the mess they leave after. "Well...I'm not sure what I can say to that other than calling dibs to drop off the kids" you say frantically before leaving the kitchen and into the living room while hearing Steve trying to call you back in the kitchen.

Once you step in the living room, you weren't sure if you wanted to go back and continue the conversation that you just had with Steve or try to at least have the kids calm down and lower their voices. "Jesus I don't know how you deal with this nerd, all he does is shove facts down your throat!" Erica practically yells at you before walking away from Dustin who is hot on her tail. "Oh IM THE NERD, you practically have the whole pony lore merged in your girly little brain" Dustin yells back at Erica while also passing by you and saying a quiet good morning (which you say good morning back).

"okay well let's leave that to Steve.." you say under your breath before walking to the little closet room in yours and Steve's house to pull out blankets and more pillows already preparing for tonight and maybe for a game that will last till night out. "Hey!" Will said pretty loudly in your ear which had you flinching a little, "Oh my God, what happened, I thought you were with Eddie and Mike? Did you forget your toothbrush again? Or was it your underwear again? You know Steve doesn't really mind besides he barley knows." You ramble and ask multiple questions to Will and whispering the last part knowing that it happened once and he trusted in only telling you. "WHAT no I'm fine, everything's fine, I just wanted to help out a little you know since it's the least we can do" Will says in a soft tone. "Oh no it's okay honey... Well you know what, maybe a little help wouldn't hurt right?" You say hesitantly, knowing how Steve gets when the kids actually help around. He tends to take control but not in a mean way more of a 'just rest my child and I'll take care of you' typa way. "Okay I need you to carry this... And this, and hold this one for me please....oh can't forget Max's..." You say while stacking pillows and blankets in Will's arms which slowly starts piling up to the point that his face is no longer able to be seen.

"is that it?..." Will asks while trying to peep his head out a little just to see if there are any more blankets, "umm....no you know what that's about it, good job buddy" you say before patting Will's shoulder indicating that he should follow you. Both you and Will walk to the living room to find everyone gone then you hear a faint voice counting. "Okay that's 2,4,6,8....8?" Steve says after counting heads to make sure everyone was sat at the table ready to eat although with so much noise and talking going around he can't seem to know if he counted wrong. But just as Steve suspected, he did count wrong as 2 more people walked into the dining room. "Ah there you guys are, okay so that's 10 in total" Steve says with a relief but his cheery tone went away as he saw Will's bottom half since the other half was covered with piles of blankets and pillows. "Babe we talked about this, if you need help call me, now look what you have done to the boy, I can't even see him" Steve says dramatically. You let out a sigh as you take the pillows and blankets from Will and told him to sit down and eat, "it's fine babe he offered and I took it, it's not gonna hurt him. And besides you seemed a little busy so I didn't want to disturb you." You say trying to calm a dramatic Steve down since you always are the one to just take things with a flow while Steve is the one to control the flow.

"I'm not gonna tell you again, if you ever need help just call me over and I'll be there, okay?" Steve says while looking down at you waiting for a response, "sure." You say just to please Steve, "good, now sit down and eat before it gets cold" Steve says with a more cheery tone as he presses a kiss on your lips.

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"UNOOO!!" Eddie exclaims very loudly which caused the kids to groan since they know that Eddie's cheating but they just can't prove it. Everyone was currently sitting on the floor around the little coffee table in the middle of the living room. Everyone decided to play uno after a long argument on how we should play it due to Dustin being competitive and wanting a specific way to play like whether or not we can jump in or pair up with someone. Everyone told him that we're just gonna play uno for the fun of it with no arguments and no competition, which never happened. Steve and you ended up teaming up and showing each other y'all's cards, Erica started becoming aggressive towards Lucas who kept +4 her. "Is there a problem between you and me cause last time I checked, we're blood related and BLOOD RELATED PEOPLE DONT BETRAY EACHOTHER!" Erica screams in Lucas's face while Lucas laughs at her overreacting. "Woah okay Erica calm down, here take my +4 and you'll get him next time when we reverse." Steve says to Erica while passing the card across the table to Erica who simply denied it and said that she didn't want his pity. "Let her fuss it out babe, she'll get over it" you say while laughing a little since you were Erica's babysitter at some point of time, so you knew how long Erica's little tantrums would last.

As the game ended with Robin somehow winning and multiple arguments breaking out. We all went out separate ways as it was almost time for dinner. You and Steve both walk into the kitchen just to finally enjoy y'all's personal time (even though y'all live together). With you deciding that you don't wanna cook, and Steve not knowing what to cook, you both agreed to order Chinese food. It was cheap and the most agreeable among the party members. Pizza was always complicated for the party, Lucas liked olives while Robin was allergic, and El liked pineapple on hers which Eddie completely despised to be in sight of pineapple pizza. Everyone had their own pizza preference that was just too much to order all together but Chinese food is what got everyone to enjoy (although you weren't a fan of Chinese food but you'll eat it for the kids).

Steve finished the order for Chinese food that we will soon have to pick up but in the mean time it was just you and Steve. Steve and you. Both embracing and enjoying each other's company even when yall aren't doing anything but it just felt so comfortable and loving. You sat on the counter with your feet dangling and Steve between your thighs while looking up at you and admiring you as if you were an angel. "You ever think about having kids" Steve asks with a foolish grin across his face, "woah, a very unexpected question at the moment" you say giggling but slowly stopped when you saw Steve still waiting for an answer, "I don't know, maybe,...actually yeah but as long as it's your kids" you say also with a foolish grin which made Steve blush "you know I actually want 6 kids, I don't remember telling you that" Steve says looking deep in your eyes, "oh trust me I remember you specifically telling me how many and what their names would be" you exclaim while rolling your eyes playfully since you have indeed heard multiple times and it's not like your complaining, infact you loved the idea of Steve also seeing his future with you and you guys are only 20 years old. "Let's get married" Steve says with a straight face and you let out a laugh but stop and clear your throat when Steve still looks at you with a straight face, "you're serious? Okay umm listen Steve I love you, I really do and I don't even want to imagine a life without you but we're 20 and we both work at a minimum wage job that barley pays for rent." You say rambling a little, "but trust me when I tell you this, I wanna get married with you so bad and specifically only you but just not right now or at least where we're at right now" you try to say with a little bit of a cheery voice so you don't totally break Steve's heart, "I promise" you say while holding out your pinky Infront of Steve's pouty face, "okay but is it okay if we have kids before we get married?" Steve asks before he even locks both of y'all's pinkies together "whatever makes you happy babe" you tell Steve with a toothy grin knowing that it would cheer Steve up, he then locks both of y'all's pinkies together and gives you a very passionate kiss that caused you to let out a little giggle in the middle of it.

"oh dude, I thought Robin said no public pda" Mike exclaims with a face of disgust before walking and purposely bumping into Steve's back to get a cold water bottle from the fridge. "Dude we're trying our best to keep it private", Steve says in a very judging tone, "you know Mike, me and Steve have seen you and El kiss but you don't see us making a big scene, have you tried growing up a little?" You say to Mike cause this isn't the first time that you and Mike have had this conversation about pda. "if it requires me growing up and becoming anything like y'all, I'd rather stay young and immature" Mike says before walking off but not before steve tells him to watch his tone. "I'm pretty sure he just called us old in so many different ways" you say to Steve, "he just doesn't get it cause he doesn't know what REAL love is, all he knows is young love....and I'm not old, trust I'm never gonna look old either" Steve says before fixing his hair with a pouty face which you laugh at cause you know how dramatic Steve gets when it comes to his age and specifically his looks.

"oh stop whining, we all know that you're gonna get grey hairs by soon mostly with all the stress the kids keep giving you" Robin suddenly comes in the kitchen startling you both just a little. "Okay first of all shut up and don't jinx it, and second who was talking to you?" Steve says in a very sassy tone since his hair is "his best feature" so God forbid anything happens to it. You let out a breathy laugh as Robin kept adding more gas into the fire. "Oh what's so funny huh, you do know you're gonna end up with grey hairs too so we'll both look 50 in our 30s" Steve says which causes you to stop laughing and before you can say anything Robin practically speaks for you, "uh no she won't, cause the kids are scared of her so they always act right around her but with you Steve, oh boy do they give you hell. In fact I'm pretty sure they only listen to y/n" Robin says with a small smirk on her lips. "Oh that's so not true!" Steve says raising his voice a little to state that he completely disagrees with Robin, "yea it is, remember at Byers house during fall, when you know the whole incident happened." You say trying to get Steve to recall what exactly happened that night, "yea what about it?" Steve says still not remembering how that night has anything to do with what they were walking about.

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Fall night 1984:

You and Steve were trusted to take care of the kids. It wasn't anything new to you when it came to having full responsibility of the kids. It practically came as a free side job for you since you protected the kids without any questions asked or needed. For Steve on the other hand, his first time taking care of 5 kids at once and he felt like there was so much responsibility in his hands. He just felt the need to take full control due to the fear of not being able to know what the kids are doing 24/7 at the moment.

With Mike and Lucas arguing about Mike panicking and Dustin having Steve shove a demo-dog in ms.byers fridge it all felt hectic to you but nothing that you couldn't handle. The only calm one that was there was max due to it being her first rodeo and completely confused about the whole situation. Suddenly all the kids start making up a plan on how to help El and everyone else that's heading towards the lab that's filled with deadly creatures. While hearing this plan Steve completely shuts it down. "Yea and then we all die" Steve says making it clear that he totally disapproves of their idea, "well that's one point of view" you say in a sarcastic way, "no y/n that's not one point of view, that's a fact" Steve says with an attitude mostly since you're the other adult that's supposed to help him out but isn't even backing him up. You then raise your hands in surrender and give Steve a mocking face before going back to sweeping up glass with max. Mike then walks off with everyone following right behind him, you and Max decide to forget about the glass pieces since there're definitely way more important things to focus on.

With Mike making a master plan of setting up the underground base on fire and having Dustin,max, and Lucas add onto the idea Steve finally attempts to put his foot down. "We're staying here, ON THE BENCH, and we're waiting for the starting team to do their job, does everybody understand that" Steve says in a demanding tone, "THIS ISN'T A STUPID SPORTS GAME?!" Mike complains to Steve but Steve still stood his ground "I said does everybody understand that, I need a yes.." Steve says pointing his fingers at the kids waiting for a response. "We don't need to listen to you" Mike says still annoyed at Steve, "okay you know what, that's enough...y/n control your kids" steve finally starts talking to you but all you did was respond with crossing your arms and shrugging your shoulders as a sign that there's really not much to say. "Oh seriously you're in on this too!?" Steve exclaims in a flabbergasted tone, "I don't know what to say Steve, it sounds like a really good plan". "Yea a good plan to get us killed". "We're not gonna die okay they know what they're doing!". "Yes imma let a bunch of kids guide me into saving the world, yea sure why not jump off a cliff while I'm at it!",

you and Steve bicker back and forth till you finally give in just to calm Steve down and to get him to shut up, "alright kids you heard him, this plan just might get us killed, steve and only steve thinks its best for us to stay put here" you say in a very rude tone to show that you also dont approved of steves idea, "but-" lucas wanted to say something but went completely quiet when you gave him a look to not talk back "we understand". "fine". "Sure". "Whatever" was the only response you got from the kids as they all got up from the floor but completely halted in their steps when they heard a very loud engine outside...

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"okay that doesn't even count, they kids were getting used to me at that time so they just don't understand how scary I can get, they listen to me. I know they do it's just y'all aren't around or y'all don't remember" Steve says still trying to defend himself which causes you and Robin to laugh at Steve's attempt. "You're right that's one of the many times that the kids listened to y/n but if you want I can go on and on and on" Robin says trying to rile Steve up and laughing through her sentence, "okay you know what I think it's time for us to pick up the food" Steve says before walking into the living room filled with many people that just seem to be in their own world, "alright who wants to come with me and get the food?.." steve says loud enough for then to hear but there still was no response given to him, you weren't even sure if they heard him. "HEY! Who wants to go with Steve and pick up the food!?" You say loudly which caused everyone's attention on you and still no response but instead everyone is looking at each other to see who's willing to volunteer and go with Steve, "no one? Okay... Dustin go with Steve" you say short and simple which caused Dustin to let out a dramatic groan, "why do I gotta go, make Mike go or max go" Dustin whines to you, "no complaints now get up and get the food. NOW!?" you reply to Dustin's complaints and say the last part loudly since you didn't see him move until you raised your voice.

You then walked up to Steve giving him a pat on the shoulder and a kiss on the cheek before walking to the bathroom. Everyone goes back to their own world again and Steve still is a little mad at the fact that the kids do only listen to you and never Steve.

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Everyone's back at the dining table and there is not a single moment that's silent. Everything is everywhere. Things being passed around in front of everyone, people calling other people's attention from across the table and loud laughter filling the air. It didn't bother you at all, okay maybe a little but you also don't know how else you would prefer the kids to be.

You suddenly snap out of your little thoughts when max mentions your name. "Y/n literally wears the pants of the relationship" max tells Steve, who is still flabbergasted at the fact that the kids listen to only you, "no she doesn't, I think that me and her both are equal in our relationship, right babe" Steve then turns to you asking for your input and opinion, "max we're equal there's no one that wears the pants okay...but I do have to take the lead sometimes" you say the last part quietly but not quite enough for Steve to not hear. "Okay first of all you don't take the lead ALL the time and I wouldn't even put it as you taking the lead, more like you knowing what's better" Steve says defending himself, "oh so she does take the lead I knew it" Eddie then chimes in the conversation out of nowhere, "no she doesn't are you guys even listening to what I'm saying?!" Steve says in a frantic way since he feels as if he's being attacked.

"Wait you're telling me that throughout all the shit we've been through, y/n has always been the decision maker?!" Eddie says in a shocked tone from connecting dots in his mind, "what no of course I make decisions too, you guys act as if I don't do anything!?" Steve raises his voice slightly which causes max and Eddie to laugh out loudly which also causes everyone else's conversation to cut off and wanting to know what's so funny. "We didn't say you don't do anything, we're just saying that you mostly listen to y/n. It honestly seems as if she wears the pants in the relationship" Eddie says while still laughing, this causes others who have been listening to laugh too. "I think we all made it clear that y/n wears the pants, I mean like look at them" max says while gesturing her hands toward me and Steve which causes us to look at each other up and down.

"It's like Steve is the mom and y/n is the dad can we all make that clear" Robin says and everyone else agrees with a small response. "Wait what?" You say a little confused on how the subject can change fast but not the topic which was y'all two, you and Steve being the target and center of the conversation. "Yea I mean you guys are like an old married couple that love each other, I think that's pretty obvious right?" Lucas says that also has everyone else agreeing with him. "Steve is so strict and paranoid like a mom and y/n is so chill and a floater like a dad." Mike adds to Lucas's statement that causes Erica to butt in, "Steve yells at me for not taking my shoes off when I walk in, y/n doesn't even bat an eye about it" Erica's comment left Steve flabbergasted. This had Steve more aware of how motherly he's been acting through the past years. "So I'm the lame, no fun boring mom while y/n is the cool fun dad?!?" Steve asks as if clarification to make sure that what they're saying to him is correct. "Pretty much". "Yea honestly". "if the show fits". "Yea" was the response Steve gets from the kids, "that's so not true I can be fun. Matter in fact I'm totally fun it's just not with y'all. I'm so fun that you guys wouldn't be able to handle me." Steve rants about how fun he is just to prove that he's not a boring mom but that doesn't seem to get to the kids, "that's exactly what a mom would say" Dustin then says to stop Steve from going on and on about "how fun he is", and this time it left Steve silent, infact it left the whole table silent waiting to see what else Steve has left to say but clearly he had nothing.

The silence caused you to let out a little snort of laughter which caused everyone to look at you. Seeing Steve get terrorized by a bunch of kids was too funny to hold in that Steve himself laughed. With you and Steve laughing this caused everyone else to laugh along. Everyone then went back to their regular conversation as if nothing happened.

You then looked at Steve with a cocky grin, "I'm their favorite parent" you say while smirking at him, "don't start" Steve says while rolling his eyes playfully and chuckling.

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With everything that has happened in the last 15 hours, the party members calmly agreed to end the day off with a movie. Robin, max, Erica, and El had the couch while everyone else had the floor. The girls wanted you to be on the couch with them but you wanted to end the day with you being in Steve's arms. "Okay everyone brushed their teeth?" Steve asks before he gets himself comfortable and sitting on the floor next to you, "yes MOM" Will says in a joking way which caused Steve to let out a huff then laugh a little. "Come on guys leave him alone, lord knows how many grey hairs you're going to give him by 30" you say in a teasing tone that caused everyone to laugh. "Oooo you're lucky I love you" Steve says after turning off all the light and putting the movie on and laying next to you.

The movie goes on for a while until everyone is out cold. All the junk they ate today completely drained them out. "You know I don't mind being the mom anymore" Steve says all of a sudden, "really? Why's that?" You say a little curious about the sudden change of opinion, "it lets me know that the kids know that I care for them even if it means I'm not fun." Steve says in a low voice trying not to wake everyone up, "I think they already know that you care for them. They just say that to get a rise out of you", you say letting out a breathy laugh that you covered with your mouth. "At least they aren't scared of me" Steve says trying to make himself feel better, "well at least they think I'm fun" you reply back in an instant to Steve's remark. "At least we're viewed as their parents" Steve says looking into your eyes with a boyish grin. "You know what, you're right, at least they look up to us" you reply back to Steve before leaning in to kiss him which Steve kissed back in an instant.

"WHY IS IT ALWAYS ME?!?!" Mike exclaims in a loud tone since he just caught you and Steve making out AGAIN.

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Pls don't be a silent reader and I hope u enjoyed

#steve harrington x reader #joe keery x reader #stranger things x reader #stranger things #steve harrington imagine #lucas sinclair #max mayfield #robin buckley #mike wheeler #will byers #dustin henderson #eleven hopper #eddie munson #mom and dad #cute couple

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shoeshoesho · 1 year

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March 17, 2023

i haven’t written in a while. I haven’t felt this bad in a while. I cant really put my finger on it. And to be honest now that i should be writing about it i find myself too tired to even dive in. Im tired of being tired. Im tired of being upset. Without even discussing the issue, the buddhist way would sound like this: Be less self centered. Everything that happens, happens. We are the creator of this reality that is in pain and anguish. We paint this landscape we feel. i feel bad at my job. I feel attached to this identity of my job. I tally my mistakes and reason with my own myself- why don’t you just quit? I feel tired and burnt out. I think to myself. Is that just an excuse for your mistakes? Or are these just excuses. Maybe, you are bad at your job? Maybe its ok to be bad at your job. Maybe if you accepted that you were bad at your job that you would be happier. Free-er.

Maybe if you let go of this. You could finally be happy doing a half ass job at your work. I ask myself why cant I be an effective person? Why do i make the mistakes i make. What self help books can I get. Or am i just. not good. at this. job. IT pays well. I bought a house. Im sitting here on my rug with the fire. alone. Was it all worth it in the end??

IS this a millenial soul reaching out for some sort of unordinary lifestyle? Should i be doing something i really love doing? What are all the answers, where are all the fucking answers.

Ive never had the confidence to do something unconventional. Ive always been so scared. So scared that if i didnt have it all, i wouldnt be happy. So now that i have it all, am i?

I feel pathetic. and i find myself hating myself. I think im tired. Tyler says im always tired. He says ive been tired for as long as ive known him...

What does that say? Is that even related to this job?

I think im getting better though. at dealing with the dissapointment.

Today me and tyler were both hanging on a string. I think i was doing ok and he snapped at me. and then we were both not ok. He had a bad week and all his plans fell through so he was upset and moping around the house. I tried to go somewhere with him but then we both lost it in the car. I found myself feeling very similar to how it was in the beginning when i worked at dominican. When he had (and still doesnt really have) the capacity to deal with me being so upset. We could not be more opposites in terms of dealing with work, and stress. I needed someone to council me to sooth me. To want to understand. I wanted someone to ask me what exactly happened and what the situation was. I wanted him to tell me it was ok- but to actually take a look at the situation.

I know he thinks he doesnt need to look at the situation, because he believes in me and thinks im over reacting overall. But i just see him brushing it off completely. In fact, he probably is cause he fucking hates talking about work. IT triggers him into some sort of spiral. talking about my work, his work. Hed rather not address it at all and act like it doesnt exist. All these work problems.

In many ways hes right though. It doesnt matter. If you treat it for what it is.. it shouldnt make me worried. In fact, i shouldnt even be talking about it right now. I shouldnt bring it up because its not importaint in our lives. Unfortunately for me i still think work is importaint to me.

Maybe i need to put efforts in something more personal. Something that could actually help me feel good about what i do. I said this today but im having hard times remembering it. We count all our mistakes but none of the good things we fix. I think maybe i could count on my fingers all the mistakes ive made this year and last year. but i never even counted all the good things ive done in my job. I dont give myself that ever.

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makahimetenshi · 8 months

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Follow me inside the wastelands - Chapter 26 -Arthur Maxson x Female Sole Survivor Fanfic

Hello to the ten maybe twenty people who keeps reading this fic 26 chapters later…its funny because I don’t see you in the numbers but I see you when I make an update. Which makes me wonder where the hell are the 60 people of chapter two, maybe in the middle of the road…and it’s a long road

If you are very very very delighted with one fic and want a continuation I didn’t write or post you can donate me at least $5 bucks, most of this fics have next chapters I don’t finish because lack of motivation but hey a $5 is a $5, I see a few reviews and comments that fics that are abandoned months laters receive comments of wanting to know what happens next. Here it is, I finished my handling with you all, enjoy the fic

The radrain didnt stop until a month and a week later from the latest events, Arthur had a bit of remorse for how things ended up last time…but not that much, he was tired. Know that this situation wasn’t normal but if knocking up somebody would be this problematic better spare himself…

A week after the radrain stop he received another letter, not from Nora, from the Longfellow old man, he was at the entrance of the airport delivering that letter and damn it was a miracle that he remembers who he was to accept it and not shoot at him, thing is that it wasn’t exactly a letter from Nora, but from Maccready, if it was really him of course, he didn’t know his calligraphy to judge if it was really him or not…

“She is at Sanctuary and will be for another pair of weeks if you want to pay a visit”

Cool, thanks for the notice…

He make a ball of the note, playing with it nervous on his hands and swallow saliva…yeah…yeah…lets pay a visit…

A paladin and a few soldiers should be enough, she says to always park the ventibird in the Red Rocket station since it’s the designated place for air vehicles…According with scribe Nereah power armor isn’t necessary for now, strong winds move all the radiation to another side this days so the air and the sky are clean to move freely, that’s what he expect of Nora doing outside too.

So he did, take a paladin and a few soldiers on a ventibird and move there, doubt that anyone but Nora will attack him…if that happens of course… he hopes to be able to take down a pregnant woman in case of anything, never did it before, its not like he wants to do it but…lately he don’t know anything…

At arriving at the station he knew that everybody in Sanctuary will be aware of his presence, so be it, but anyway he told the paladin and the soldiers to stay aside and just watch any weird movement in the settlement, if they hear shootings of course to come and help but nothing more than that, just in case of an emergency scenario.

But even before placing a foot down on the ground he saw at the wooden bridge a patrol of minutemens with…a pregnant lady in a blue vault suit. He swallows saliva and walk towards them. Meeting Nora, looking at her in the eyes avoiding to look at her belly. It wasn’t the only thing he wanted from her of course

At standing one in front of the other he wanted to talk and say anything, not really having something planned, before they didn’t have all this problems to communicate but now he felt like nothing more needs to be said even if there was a lot of talk to be done. But she did first. She talk first- Come on, lets go to my house to talk.

Arthur sighted and relax his shoulders, sometimes they understand the other too well

Of course he didn’t want their private drama to be part of his soldiers and hers but they need protection constantly from their positions.

Walking along her felt good and correct in another time but now it feels…odd…it gives him bad vibes, he hated that, wished everything to be as before but…no…his eyes slip to her rounded belly, his child was there now, and he loved it, this was all worth for him, maybe not easy but yes worth for him. A bad chill press on his spine when he saw the door of her house, the last time he was there maybe…it was when they conceive their child.

Both go inside the house and Nora leaned against the next wall, looking down, hands behind her back.

-Isnt that suit a bit tight?

-Why are you here Arthur? –rude, she always has awful ways to say things

-I suppose you would be here after the rain is over

-Its true, there’s a lot of settlement work to do everywhere, the radstorms leave a lot of damage in people houses…only im not doing it, im giving directions and helping but not much

-Im glad you aren’t…-he stay in silence for a moment, looking at the ground before looking up again- Nora its over –she look at him, not saying anything- you are five months now what do you expect to happen? You are even taking care of yourself, its not like you expect to loose it and free yourself from this –her hands moved to her belly, only to the sides.

-Taking care of it is something that it just felts natural and correct to do…I pass through this before…but I never expect it to happen again less with you.

-When you ask your husband down in the vault 111 about being happy again weren’t you talking about me? –he was quite sad about that

-Yes…and I was right, it did end horribly like with the last person I take down there

-It didn’t end, im not saying anything about an end, I keep looking for you because I don’t want it to end

-You know why im here? Why I still am a brotherhood soldier? –what? That only confuse Arthur- because I killed Danse –what does a thing have to do with the other? Nora sobbed, and look up trying to contain the tears in her eyes to not fall down her cheeks- If Danse would stay alive I would align with the institute just for his sake, but I killed him

-You killed him because I order you, he was synth and an spy…-he didn’t get it.

-No, I didn’t follow your orders, I killed Danse because I was mad I couldn’t convince him to run away with me, I confessed my feelings expecting it would change his mind and he say he can only look at me as a sister, I was mad, I let a fury consume me and I killed him taking the opportunity because I was so mad to be rejected after wanting him for so long…but not for the good of the Brotherhood…because I resented him –now tears were going down her cheeks, this was the second time Nora talks about killing someone because a fury consume her

So…Danse was the other guy everybody talk about. But they never were a thing.

-What does this have to do with our baby? So much time passed…-well it does feel like shit knowing that your woman has feelings for other person not gonna lie, but it doesn’t matter that much since he is dead a long time now

-If he choose to stay with me I would align with the institute to keep him secured by my side for sure

-With the same son you kill because of the atrocities he made? –this was bullshit, an attempt to make him go away.

-Or the railroad maybe I don’t know im…-she moved her hands to the sides of her head

-Confused, because this has nothing to do with our child, with me…with us…-Arthur step in front of her and place his hands on the sides of her belly, feeling it warm and heavy on his palms.

-I loved him, he was my best friend –Nora was sobbing, and as much her words were a stab on the chest they were discussing something far much important- and I was so mad for so little…I killed him, he didn’t deserve it

-Nora I told you before that you don’t have to be a saint all the time, you have the right to feel and you are pretty aware of it, you feel and do all the time –lets just forget the Danse subject shall we? It hurts him too, remembering your best friend hurts so much

-Don’t you see that I don’t choose the brotherhood? That I didn’t choose you!? -oh no she wouldn’t pull him away with this- if would choose anything else if he was still alive!

-Bullshit, you look after me for months, what we have is real and you can’t deny it, enough with this nonsense

-I would never choose an hypocrite with tech parts –now he did separate, doing circles on the floor walking almost laughing.

-You are so desperate, have nothing against me, you don’t wanna just admit that there’s absolutely no reason for this drama –she looks ashamed behind all the tears and the red nose.

-No…i…

-Come on, if you didn’t have an abortion until now, when? You want this baby, and don’t have a real problem with me…because I didn’t give you any single reason…ever

-Do you really want someone like me to be the mother of your child? –someone with an unclear goal, who flips sides all the time, who doesn’t like the idea of being a mother again

-This isn’t about me! –Arthur pointed at her with a sarcastic smile, cornering her in her own trap- I don’t get why five months later we keep discussing the same thing but yes! I do! For god sake I do!...-he stay in silence, looking at his sad dog face thinking carefully before talking- listen to me…I been working really hard…this half year…due to the results and achievements we both –he pointed at himself and her- had…I been promoted…

-You are already elder what biggest promotion would you need? –she was confused, still sobbing.

-I been talking and negotiate with other elders in California…contacting them back, they recognize my authority over Lyons…is not just my soldiers, my followers like they used to call them…I don’t have a cult…they recognize mine as a chapter of the brotherhood with no doubt…im no longer on Lyons shadow.

God. Nora close his eyes, its true, Arthur have his own problems too, and never take the time to think on them. Be at his side.

-And? –she moved close to him, taking his hands, feeling awful about never care about him, its true, she place all her drama in his shoulders and never care about his problems, her own hands tremble but this is the minimum she can do about it, even if it was useless and one attempt to feel herself better.

-We can go Nora, we can go away –he look at their hands together.

-I don’t get it.

-We can travel away from the Commonwealth, settle in somewhere else –she shook her head to the sides.

-What?

-You have horrible memories and experiences of this place, this land, lets go away, make new ones, the three of us…

-Can we do that? –Nora was so confused

-Yes! I have everything prepared…im just waiting for you…for our son…

She loose his hands, but Arthur put his on her shoulders, moving her head with his to look into her eyes.

-I…I don’t know…I have so many things here…

-This place only give you suffering the more you are here, lets go away from this memory’s, make some new ones with me and our child

Her breathing accelerates, a lot.

-I don’t think I can

-Nora it’s a chance for us

-But what about the minutemens…

-You can pass the power so someonelse, forget it, you are a sentinel you can work anywhere

-What do you mean

-I want us to be happy together

-I was happy before the baby! –she screamed, pulling away from his grip walking around the house nonononononono

-You weren’t happy before –Arthur follow her.

-Maybe –again, she grabbed the sides of her head.

-We can be all happy together, away from the horrors of the commonwealth

-I don’t know I have so many things to do…-Arthur place his palms in her cheeks, making her look into his blue eyes, she melted into that gaze.

-Im here just waiting for you Nora, I not leaving without you…but we can heal together away from this place

-The wastelands horrors are everywhere…my malnourished slim little kid –oh gosh she remembers

-They are, but together we are stronger…-her eyes fill with tears and Arthur hug her, pulling her against her chest, kissing on her head while she sobbed.

-I have to think of it…-why?- there’s so much im leaving behind

-You made a manual in case of death, what more do you need? Consider yourself dead and come with me, in case you died for any reason somebody else have to take your place anyway…

-Well I prefer you to have my caps ally…-true, logically true

-This door is open for us, only together, you told me a lot of times you wanted to travel away from the Commonwealth, this is not your old home anymore

-I don’t know if I will fit good as a mom no matter the place

-Im also becoming a dad –she look up at him, taking a breath, closing her eyes before hiding her face on her neck

-I have to think on it

Well

She didn’t say no but…that wasn’t a yes…and knowing her…she was saying no for sure. She didn’t want to follow him into the wastelands.

Arthur separate, and place a hand on her belly, it was the biggest he had seen until now and he believes…it was going to be the biggest he see forever…He feared not seeing her again for some reason stiching in the back of his neck and it didn’t feel like a common fear.

He took a long breath, look up trying to hold the tears, not wanting to take out his hand from there. He feared not being able to touch there again.

-Nora please

-I just have some things to do…

-I love you –he said out from the heart, but he knew that wouldn’t break her, wouldn’t reach her…

-I love you too

Not really, both stop loving each other with the same intensity as before. And that break Nora and Arthur hearts.

-Does it move? The baby –the question take Nora by surprise- its five month your exams are good you should feel something

-You have no idea –what does that mean? – it hits hard for only being five months…

-You are big –maybe too big for five months only, but he never see a full healthy pregnancy before, always on sick and malnourished womans. Nora put his hands over her belly, pressing them down over the leather of the vault suit

-Maybe too big for any suit

-Don’t worry, I can get as many comfortable clothes you need

-Ill give you an answer later…-that was a no, Arthur give up for today with grief, he move his hands away separating but the second before pulling…he swear he felt something against his palm.

-You know ill be waiting…im not leaving without any of you

-I know…

The elder will leave that day with the feeling on his palm of…something pressing hard against it…and the round sensation of her warm belly.

He took the ventibird at the Red Rocket station with the paladin and the soldiers waiting for him back to the Prydwen, the whole journey he would think on his pregnant woman and his 5 months child moving inside her, really moving. Soldiers can see that the elder was tired, defeated, again, today wasn’t a victory for him, the sentinel was being too rough and difficult to seduce.

That day Arthur decided that if she was going to stay at Sanctuary working unable to convince her, he would infiltrate an spy between the minutemens lines, not for anything more than just watch her and inform about her everyday and well being

He needed to be in some form…present…for her and their son if she didn’t allow it.

But he wouldn’t use a soldier from his own forces, he asked the other elders for an external intelligence soldier to come to the Commonwealth for a secret mission, not because his were unable but they all know Nora and had connections to her, maybe someone loyal to her and her triumphs will snitch on him. I mean if the elder ask you on a mission it was important if course but there may be some friendships or closeness involved since she was such an important soldier from so long, she started from initiate and had a big link…to Danse…one of the most popular and beloved Paladins…even if his name faded in time because his anti-synth campaign did good results.

Maybe it wasn’t moral, but he wanted to know what was up with his family, she didn’t want him close because of her own traumas and honestly he can’t travel everyday and mobilize a group to protect him, he had duties and responsibilities to do. Maybe she had hers to, he wouldn’t deny that, but clearly…their thing was dying, she didn’t want him close. He offer everything.

The only single thing he didn’t offer was to end up the pregnancy, and even if he offer it not only now it was too late he doubted it would improve something.

Maybe the baby really change the things, as it was expected of course it would change things…but he wished for things to get only better and they didn’t. He puts too much confidence in this relationship. It break his heart having this realizations but…It would be foolish to continue complaining after 5 months. That’s it. Its over.

He kick the table in his quarters with a small kick, but still one of the bottles of vodka fell, not spill…looking at the transparent bottle make him realize how much passed since he stopped drinking…before Nora he drink at least one shoot a day, and now this bottle was in the table as decoration mostly since year and half…

Maybe he needed a drink today.

The spy was introduced two weeks later in Sanctuary, as a citizen of the Commonwealth who came to work and live from the radio transmissions.

For an entire month he followed Nora and Maccready from the shadows, giving weekly reports to the elder of this chapter and everything seem…normal…apparently she gives directions and orders only, organizes patrols and logistics. She doesn’t eat in the communal dinners. Wakes up early to do…small labor, like cleaning the streets and moving the cattle, lately they were fencing the surroundings of the “isle” that is Sanctuary.

But she is big, bigger than any pregnant woman that the spy have ever seen for her time, it couldn’t be a thing of prewar genes.

Maccready was around, and specifically says in the report, around enough to not bother and not be noticed. It was almost like he was the spy of Maccready and Maccready was the sentinel spy. The spy suspected that Maccready had a slightly idea of what he was doing here, but not his identity.

Should he warn Maccready? Or it would be too much? Two spys over a single person…

Nah, he didn’t need to know that much.

Two weeks later. Nora ambushed the spy against a wall and put a knife on his neck.

Not using force by any methods, just corner him walking around in one garden, walking at his side was enough for her to push him lightly against a wall and since the spy knew that she was the pregnant mother of elder Maxson child he wouldn’t do anything to defend himself to not causa an accident.

Nora had the card of being the general of this place, almost like Hancock in Goodneighbord, she can do…a lot of questionable stuff that usually would be excused as something she does to protect Sanctuary, so pushing and menacing a settler against a wall…was something nobody would question at all. She had a good enough image so this wouldn’t bother at all.

-Let me go! –say the spy, not actually scared about the knife on his neck, acting to not break character.

-You think I wouldn’t notice eventually an spy in my home? –she said spitting in his face, taking another knife out of…he couldn’t really know where but Nora take lessons from Hancock on how to be a good mayor- so, who send you? I think I was in good terms with the railroad

-Im not an spy!

-Drop the act dumbass, it will make it easy for you

-Please I beg you! –a raider gang maybe? This guy didn’t look that weird

-You know I never had the chance to interrogate someone on court before the bombs dropped…this may be a good practice –she said before giving him a hard punch in the stomach, when the man fell to the ground beated by pain she sat on his back and use both hands and knifes, one under his neck and the other up behind the head. Shit this was no good at all.

-Believe me im not a spy! I swear!

-Not good enough, keep trying

The spy can see from the side of his eyes how people were coming over them, noticing the odd and violent situation happening in the peaceful settlement, damn if more people joined this would be more and more dangerous for him.

-You are making a mistake general!

-Maccready, give me a hand over here, hold his feet

Oh no, not him precisely. Both man exchanged looks and…damn he understand the situation, he understand who he was and what he was doing there.

-If you weren’t pregnant ill already be free! –its true, he can’t harm her, she was carrying the son of the elder, if by any chance she receives any harm that would be his end, better summit and not move a muscle

-You sure buddy? –she asked all cocky

-Just because you are the general doesn’t mean you can do this!

-Nora –Robert call her securing the man ankles, she look at him with a bit of effort due to keeping the concentration on her prey –we need to talk

-What? –she said getting off the spy with her legs to knee in the ground next to him, still with the knifes on his neck, loosing a bit of control cutting slighy the flesh making the spy jump a bit when Maccready come close to whisper on her ear his concerns. Whisper whisper whisper…-that fucker –was that an insult to elder Maxson? That will go in the report –you –Nora call him taking the knifes out and kicking the side of his body while Maccready secured his wrist- come with us

This wasn’t an experience she needs as a pregnant woman, less with the belly at this stage but oh well she can still move good without problem

-Let me go! –scream the spy while Maacready make him stand to walk to Noras house, at getting inside Codsworth understand the situation with the strange man and move besides her to protect his pregnant maam.

-Come on, I said that resisting will do it more difficult for you –the raider talk was something that really entertained Nora

-Again! Im not a spy! –Maacready kick him in the calves making the man curl in pain, the mercenary took the chance to sit him down in a chair, not tying him up, standing behind.

-Hey General –call the mercenary to the woman on the other side on the room- do you still have the Throatslicer? –well that name sound intimidating

-Oh yeah, what a great idea –she said with a bright smile, in the moment she leave the room the handy robot behind her pull out a circular saw, just pull it out but when she came back throw something to Maccready in the air –here you go!- and stand against a wall, placing her hands on her belly

-So –said the mercenary catching a rusted knife, just placing it in his shoulder, securing it the grip with his fingers, letting the blade between his neck and shoulder- are you going to make it easy? For you, specially

-I don’t know what more do you need to convince you im not a spy

His brotherhood training didn’t let him fear a hostage situation but this was taking too long to change, I mean he assumed this was a situation it could happened and for a month he did it pretty well but…she is a sentinel, of course this wouldn’t last too much.

-What is a scar or two? –said the mercenary before strabbing him in the right shoulder by the front, taking by surprise the brotherhood spy who tried to stand from the chair but the mercenary wouldn’t let him, pulling him down again in the chair, stabbing him in the left shoulder now- heres goes the second! –the soldier tried to fight and use his arms to defend himself but the wounds there make his grip all weak

-Let me! Im swear im not a spy! –his voice cracked in pain, still in the other side on the room, Nora was watching

-Robert –she called him, the mercenary close his arms around his neck to avoid him from running away –an ear

-You cant be serious –said the spy taking a breath- im not what you think! –the opens on his shoulders were getting hot from the blood coming out

-Do it –she said as the Mister Handy robot leave her side and move closer with the flamer and the circular saw, to menace him to stay in place as the mercenary pull one of his ears and place a knife in the union between the ear and his head- you can talk you know?

-Please don’t! –ok the acting wasn’t working, she wasn’t softening and he was really doing his best to not drop the image of an innocent settler. When the knife started to cut a bit of skin the spy overventilated and surrender-Ill do it! –like a professional, Maccready stopped but move the knife to his neck again, were there was a bit of blood flowing down too.

-Will you talk? –she said getting closer.

-Yes! –oh no the wounds on his shoulders were really really bleeding

-Alright, but the knife stays there –a sadistic smile appeared on her face, the woman take out 2 syringes, one of med-x and another of stimpack from whoever knows were…-see this buddy? Im giving it to ya when we are done

-Im bleeding –his clothes were all wet and the metallic smell from blood was all over the place

-Don’t worry, I don’t have rugs anymore in this house, too much bloodstains to clean

-So who is your boss? –ask the mercenary moving the knife around

The spy didn’t want to talk at all but…

-The brotherhood…

-Weird you don’t recognize him–said Maccready to Nora.

-Odd to me too, doesn’t act and move like an initiate neither, what are you doing in this side of the commonwealth fella?

He didn’t want to talk at all

-Im sure there’s plenty of interesting places around to sneak your noses more than this old neiberhood –mutter the mercenary into the spy ear

-Not if the sentinel is not around –said the spy, Nora look confused at him.

-Me? Why me?

-I believe is pretty big obvious Nora –when Robert said that Nora give a kick to the air and look at the ground

-let me tell you something –said the woman walking slowly towards him- you can still de your work around –Maccready raise an eyebrow confused, the spy too- yeah…you can stay here…-she said with a smile, the spy swallow saliva at seeing that curve- you can even write this conversation in your report –she wasn’t mentioning the elder at all, but it was implied- in fact I want you to specifically communicate this so listen up –the woman knee in front of him looking at his terrified eyes, it wasn’t easy to keep the composure in front of someone with so many raider vibes- you can watch me, follow me, try to sneak into my secrets…but you will fail, one day I will disappear out of nothing and there will be no sight of me at all, I will be out of your sight so youll have nothing to report at all more than your failure, I swear ill make you fail you mission stupid toy

The man swallow again feeling a void in his stomach.

-You will let me around?

-Yeah, you can still do settlement work, live and eat our food –she stand up, looking big and powerful, menacing- are you a brotherhood soldier or a third party?

-A brotherhood soldier –Nora make a sign with the head to Maccready and the man put the knifes down, lifting him up from the chair as she stands back.

-Never see you before –she said as dropping the med-x an the stimpack to the ground, not breaking them, just letting them fall, one of the syringes having a small crack on the sides spilling the content by little drops- you are lucky I don’t let a brother or a sister down, go away sucker

The spy knee down trying to pick up the syringes before the liquid spills on the ground and loose the chance to heal a bit, his arms and shoulders hurts like hell but he was able to move enough to pick the items, as soon he got them between his fingers doing that regrettable show the mercenary pull the neck of his coat and use the force to take him out of the house as Nora open the door, throwing him outside like a pile of trash, not caring if he crashed against the floor.

Door was smashed in front of the spy face, who take the chance to inject the stimpack and the med-x in his shoulders, feeling the burning of the cuts in his neck still present

Inside the house Nora pull the hairs at the side of her face, having a burnout of stress.

But she will keep her word.

The spy was still around, walking, working, eating, sleeping, defending the settlement, going on patrols searching for problems nearby…she wouldn’t look at him in the eye, others would direct him but there he was, still around, no one was kicking him. Yes, other settlers were suspicious of his attitudes and manners, because of the show, of course if the general menace you with a knife against a wall and then interrogates you in her house you won’t be seen as well as before by other people specially if they loved her so much but…he was still around.

He will write this to the elder in his report, repeat everyword of her, specially the menaces and comments about him. But after that report others followed, others that will look like more like before the discovers the spy, saying that the days were normal, that she was working around and directing things as usual, not talking to him its true but…just like before…her pregnancy look normal, growing everyday a bit more.

Its like she wanted the spy around.

At 7 month, she will stop using the vault suits to change it for dresses, like a Laundered denim dress, surely because she doesn’t fit anymore in other clothes and they were too tight to move around with her gigant belly…and a Old fisherman's hat, not sure why so ugly but it must be to protect from the sun. Something was odd with that pregnancy, she was too big, really big.

But a week later after that…she keep her word…and disappear…the spy lost track of her for two more entire weeks. She vanished in the air. He would ask around to the people or what they acted like his bosses, not only no one wanted to answer much because it wasn’t really their business to get in trouble because the newbie was asking too much but because they didn’t know either.

He wrote the elder about it, about her dissaparence, how she wasn’t around, she wasn’t working on the settlement but apparently didn’t leave because everybody that would be her companion was around. Even Maccready.

She wasn’t dead, there was no movement if that was the case but everything was still so organized and fine that it couldn’t be, she was directing people from somewhereelse.

The spy started to panic and get dessesperate nonononono he loose his objective, he performed horribly in this mission, the spying was a fiasco, the cover up was a mess…and now the sentinel is gone! His discontent was starting to be visible because of how many people he was asking to get more information about the sentinel whereabouts, so visible that the man that almost cut one of his ears approach him one night, with a letter.

-Give this to elder Maxson –was the only thing the mercenary said to him

The spy delivers the letter to the airport with another soldier connections, not wanting to face the elder Maxson at all, arguing that he wanted to return to the settlement to see some new movement happening.

Maxson open the letter with full frustration knowing the situation from previous reports, she was so slippery to any of his plans.

“Nora is doing fine, healthy according to Curies report” said the letter Maccready read “Ill update you about her status but since she is not going out for a while…”going out? So she was underground? Oh his poor brain was trying to extract and read between lines as many information as possible”Changing, but since she is not my woman I will not look at that”Oh he can understand the meaning of that, still, Nora was barely still his woman at this point ”I don’t think she is ready even at this time, if you send some goods…ill deliver them to her “So the mercenary have access to whenever she was “I try to convince her everyday that she doesn’t have to do this alone, I lost my wife and I don’t think any protection is enough for the ones we love, she would do good in have you at her side, a little extra more of protection” is she the only who don’t see how unnecessary this is? Apparently she doesn’t bad mouth of him at all, if this letter was truly written with sincerity of course”Since I don’t have as many time as before ill leave you the details of my payment in the dorso of this letter, as you see and heard im doing fine my part of protecting her” of course, this man was working for his son Duncan “You are going to receive more letters from me, she is at the end stage and you deserve to be informed as well” oh gosh she really was the problem everybody understand him so well “Dunkan wasn’t fond of your offer and I wasn’t fond of leaving him again after being separated, I know you will take care of your son well as I do with mine, anyway, Nora doesn’t know about this letters, doesn’t have a way to, so ill keep informing you how things are going”

Arthur look at the back and there was drawings and instructions of apparently a place to leave the payment in caps secured until he has time to look them again, of course he wouldn’t have time if he has to be around Noras side.

It was useless to keep searching more hidden things in this letter content, it was pretty clear, I mean clean and vague because it doesn’t say much but there was no seconds intentions at least from a man that wasn’t as smart as her, Maccready was just an ignorant mercenary, doesn’t have the capability to write something more deep or do more than just…killing…performing his job…

So…she was…fine…

And changing…

Arthur prepared a package of things she left behind here in the Prydwen, at some point in their relationship she became comfortable enough to bring a few of her most beloved possessions to his quarters thinking it was their forever spot, new and beautiful dresses, clothes of all kind, magazines, books, hair products…she surely needed them since well its difficult to find this odds in the commonwealth.

By making this items go he was…letting an important part of their past together go to…separate…

But she needed them, his son would need clean sheets and blankets too, so he prepared a package to send…

Clothes and underwear for her, towels, infant clothes and a pacifier for their child he asked from the California chapters, clean sheets and blankets, a bottle for babys milk…even if he wanted to hold it feeding his child…he let that thought go away, didn’t need it right now doesn’t know how things are going to develop once the baby is born, he was living day by thay this tortuous situation…wiping sheets, soap, shampoo, purified water cans, cloth diapers for change as underwear for the baby…

Food he supposed she has…wasn’t going to fill space on things she wouldn’t eat…

Meds supply like rags, cotton, alcohol, clean surgery items, pillows, antibiotics…

Arthur was letting some of her things go away from his quarters with all the pain in the word, hating everysecond, but he do this for his child, now his child was the most important thing in the world. If the zeppelin by some reason exploded, he would run away to look after his child immediately.

The package will be delivered to Sanctuary directly…and hopefully if Maccready gives the goods to Nora, his spy will be able to locate her again. Hopefully.

A last pair of gifts for Nora were placed in the package, this feels like a coffin to their relationship, but she was the mother of his child and she would surely appreciate it, she was giving him something important, something she apparently never wanted but…do it for him. As she said, this was her solution.

At vault 111 Nora open the package that Maccready and Preston sneak in secret in the middle of a cold night with guards around securing the perimeter, knowing there was spys of the brotherhood nearby, being the most careful as possible to not snitch the general secret private quarters in Sanctuary…this will be her private spot for the last days of the pregnancy. She secured herself with Codsworth and Curie as her only company, but if Maccready and Preston were careful…they can be around sometimes, a few, maybe once a week.

Inside the package there was a box with supply’s and…it was surrounded by bloomed roses, open, bright red with a with a beautiful aroma of roses that enveloped Nora as soon as she opened the package seeing that spectacle took her breath away but the fresh watermelon that was among the provisions made her eyes water.

Gosh she never wanted things to end this way.

#makahimefanfic #fallout 4 #elder maxson #sole survivor #arthur maxson

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magentamedicines · 2 years

Text

What's in the Dark (Pt.3)

-------------------------

Evan had always hated school, he had a good reason for it, everyone there was just as mean as everyone at home. What was the point of leaving the house if everything was always the same regardless?

"Alright kids, find a partner for today's art project," Evan was barely concentrating on what the teacher was saying, how could he when he was too busy being pelted by spitballs from the back of the class?

"Last one left has to pair with the loser," Evan didn't recognize the sneering voice from across the room, but he didnt care to figure it out, all his classmates sounded the same anyway, exactly like his brother.

So Evan waited, and since his class was an odd number of students, eventually he was left by himself.

Well, mostly by himself- he always had Fredbear Jr. of course. Most of his classmates though the bear was creepy, it had a weird smell, it was always watching somebody, but Evan didn't mind, he thought it was quite rude for everyone else to judge the bear because they didn't like Evan.

"Evan? Aren't you going to join another group?" Miss Vallerie was a nice woman, she had black hair that was always pulled into a tight bun and she always wore the color blue, Evan liked her a lot, but she didn't seem to notice much.

"All the groups are full, I'm gonna work alone," Evan said plainly, already grabbing for a box of crayons.

"Alright, let me know of you change your mind," Miss Vallerie sighed, turning away.

Art time was Evan's favorite time of the day, he was pretty sure that was the only thing he and Michael would ever have in common, but Michael was never very nice with Evan's drawings.

Then again, Michael was never very nice about anything relating to Evan.

Which was why he hated the fact that it was always Michael that picked him and Elizabeth up from school to take them to the diner.

But, at least the diner had something the house and the school didn't, somewhat decent food.

"Thank you Uncle Henry," Evan muttered as he started on a slice, laughing slightly as his uncle ruffled his hair.

"Anything for my favorite customers, I'll see you later little buddy," Henry said with a chuckle before disappearing off to the back.

Evan watched him leave for a while before turning to the coloring sheets Henry had placed on the table for him.

He'd gotten so engrossed in his coloring in fact, that he'd completely missed when his brother and sister left the diner for home.

"Mike? Lizzie? Dad?" Evan looked around, rather frantically, for any sign of his family members.

He left without you. He knows that you hate it here. You are right beside the exit. If you run, you can make it. Hurry- run toward the exit.

Evan stood frozen for a few moments, not quite sure what to make of Fredbear Jr.'s instructions, then he thought perhaps he could make one last try for the stage, that perhaps his father was performing.

NO! Do you remember what you saw? The exit is the other way! Hurry and leave!

Evan stood petrified at the shadows on the walls of Fredbear and Springbonnie, their movements were mechanical, there wasn't anyone wearing the suits on stage right now.

Finally, Evan managed to move back toward the exit, glancing to the side to finally see his father, he was helping someone into one of the suits, whoever it was looked tired, like they were falling asleep.

Evan thought about calling for him, but his father looked angry- bothering him when he was angry at work was even worse than just bothering him at work.

It's too late. Hurry the other way and find someone who will help- you know what will happen if he catches you.

But when Evan turned back toward the exit he was met with something much more terrifying, another big yellow bear with too many teeth staring down at him.

And Evan felt that same familiar trembling sensation, a quiver in his lip, and tears began to fall from his cheeks.

"Evan! Charles- go back to greeting the other customers, I'll handle this," Evan's tears subsided into sniffles at the sound of Henry's voice, and at the disappearance of that terrifying bear creature.

"Shh shh- I gotcha little buddy, where's your brother?" Henry asked, picking Evan up and holding him on one side so his head could rest on Henry's shoulder.

"Left without me- Lizzie too. . ." Evan said quietly, his voice already hoarse.

"I see- how about I ask Will if I can drop you off myself then?" Henry said, Evan's eyes widened, he shook his head frantically.

"Can't bother dad at work- busy busy busy-" Evan muttered, Henry frowned slightly.

"Alright, well then how about you stay with me in my office while I fill out paperwork?" Evan just nodded, already falling asleep from emotional exhaustion.

The scolding he got from his father wasnt quite as bad as two days prior, but the fact that Michael had barely been punished for leaving him behind certainly hadn't helped matters.

"I knew I should've just walked home. . . If it happens again I'm just gonna run for it." Evan muttered.

Tomorrow is another day. . .

#cori writes #whats in the dark au #evan afton #michael afton #henry emily #elizabeth afton #william afton #tw abandonment #tw abuse

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ancientgoddessofegypt · 2 years

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Mercury retrograde.. again

So this dream takes me back to the past a little, like always. Mercury in retrograde has a way of showing me whats going on with past people, places, situations and what its doing to me and my psyche.

So when I seen my ex 'friend' who I recently stopped talking to last month appear in my dream I was like 'here we go again'.

It wasnt bad, though. I actually liked where everything was going. It was truth, to say the least. So im picking up things I left in a particular house and I see this persons sister come up to me. she says hello and hug. It was good seeing her again! I see the ex friend and another mutual person I knew with him. They were always close friends. Anywho, I say hey to him and he says something like "I see youre here today". Something cold, but not anything I cared about. In my mind I said whatever he's on is not my business. Cause I aint care. Anyways the sister tells me all my stuff are in the other room which happens to be next to his room. The toxic part of me wants to go in his room, hide in there and check his phone and see what he's possible said to me to other people but the get my head back in order and go back down stairs because... no lmao.

As im preparing to get all my stuff I see the one friend come up to me and ask me did I block him? I say yes I blocked you through text, but not on instagram. I see the ex friend smile and laugh, like he had won or something.

But the other boy asked me why I did it, I answered truthfully and I tell him because I was nervous that people in your friends friend group, which is you, would come asking me about the situation and my anxiety was already bad during that time so I figured blocking anyone affiliated with him would do the trick.

because it was a really bad week mentally but I kept picking myself up, his friend is an emotional vampire and during the week of our 'friendship breakup' he kept bothering me for more reactions after I had finally cut him off like how he was trying to cut ME off. weird shit.

But his friend understood me though, and he came to give me a hug. He said 'wow, thank you for your honesty, I didnt know you would be honest with me'. I said 'its cool'.

I wasn't sure if I should be honest with him in that moment, I was tired of being sooooo vulnerable with people who dont care. But vulnerability is a strength, not a weakness. The friend says to give him a hug and I give him a 'cheap one' like he calls it, like the one where you hug them from the side, but it was unintentional. The boy was like 'you know you could give me a better one than that!' in a joking manner. So we embrace finally, like a real embrace. No fake shit. I was surprised by this, because actually getting to know this guy I didn't think it would come to this. But I knew from the beautiful embrace, that our relations to each other was finally over. The end was finally approaching and ties were no longer here.

I noticed the ex friend sitting down at this point but I seen he wasn't smiling this time. Again I was minding my business and let it go to do what needed to be done.

Now I'm heading to a store to pick up some belongings I ordered from this weird store I was working for. And guess who I see there? The ex-friend. He works there! But I paid him no mind again, I just wanted to get my things and go. He says something to me in a cold manner again, I remember just saying to him 'ok' and keeping it movin'. It took a while to get all these items together and put them in my basket to go to the car. He was suppose to help me because thats his job, but he didn't do it.

This ain't even the best part, so where im at is some type of amuse meant park. I didn't realize until I looked outside. I hear a faint voice that moves closer and closer to the room I'm in. It's my dad! And his son. With some other woman. He's holding a baby but I cant figure out if its my little sister or not. I haven't spoken to him in months since the accident with me and my mom and at some point had no plan on it because he was very weird and disgraceful throughout the process of my mom being in the hospital. So I just cut him off for good. He keeps talking about his wife so I hear, but he looked happy! So that was good. I say 'be right back' to the ex-friend, the worker and go closer outside to see if it was really him and it was in fact him. Trailing behind him was the other younger sister, the middle child. I knew it was her from a glance so I hurried back in because I didnt want to be seen or noticed by any of them.

She ends up coming in the same store I'm trying to get this stuff and go, the boy asks 'Is everything alright?' In an obvious cold, but enticed for drama manner. I say 'Im fine'. But I'm obviously trying to hide my face between the underwear and food that im trying to bag up and take. At this point I put my head back up because at this point she does notice me but doesn't care so this is good lmao. I see her smiling at something on the screen when the guy who runs the store FINALLY comes in and explains whats he's doing to the people who are here to work on a mysterious new amusement that will be here in the park. This is when I notice the ex-friend finally bagging up some things like he was supposed to. Lol. I remember almost saying thank you to him but changed my mind because what the hell? The guy who owns the store runs over to speak to me for a bit about any questions or concerns I may have about partaking in this new thing but I was just ready for the undertaking. I knew I could do it. It was an artistic gig. Anyways I noticed the middle sister again she was interested in buying something in there, I realized then she KNEW who I was but she didn't know I was her sister.

Crazy.

I knew I must of changed a lot since the last time I seen her, but at this point I didn't care. I was just ready to go.

Dream ends.

#mercury retrograde #storytime #spiritual #thoughts #myjournal #spirituality #astrology #poem #poetry #storytelling #mydreams

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meet-at-tycho · 29 days

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OKAY MORE I CANT HELP IT...

you better believe i show them off, too. like no ones business im always LOOK. AT WHAT MY FRIEND DID... look, im so proud of them 😽😽 i really am like WOW!!! idk im enamored anything they do is the best thing in the world to me. whats that about rose tinted glasses? thats how it is SORRYYYY cant help it you are perfect to me and i love you like. IM ENTHRALLLED theres a lot of words i could use to describe how i feel about them. hooked is a good one, absolutely CAPTIVATED, hook line and sinker baby im in heaven 🥳 im still coping cuz im still lonely but. if i flood my mind with the thought of them, itll be enough to get my thru til they come back :]

dude i remember last halloween? best halloween ever okay I . i mightve been dying of sleep deprivation but i got correctly gendered the entire fucking day AND. i had my bestie in my phone, idc if i looked rude or anything talking to her the whole fcking day? i feel so. LOST when im without them, so knowing i had her with me the entire time like. I REALLY HAD SUCH A GREAT TIME.. i wish i could relive that day over and over again, but i still have more days to experience!!! shes so creative and brilliant and fucking UNHINGED like a little rat crawling thru the walls WHATS WRONG WITH HER.... idk but i love it :] she absolutely is carrying like. prehistoric diseases i dont know how and i dont know when shes gonna dispatch them but im afraid

or like? my birthday was a good example. neither of them knew it was cuz i dont like to tell people but.. we spent the day together and it . i was genuinely so happy, its the first birthday i havent ended up crying on. like YEAH yr right you WERE the gift!!!!!!! you genuinely were im. KICKING MY FEET AND GIGGLING

i spend the so much time with him, SIR. the man that you are im. only incomprehensible growling and barking comes to mind when i think of you BUT it translates to: YOU ARE EVERYTHING TO ME!!! no hes so silly for real i genuinely cant get enough of him. i remember. even the very first time we vced like just us, it wasnt even really awkward at all!!!! felt a little unsure but I HAD SO MUCH FUN.. our chemistry.. mr whiter..... really though its. or that time we spent like 12 hours in call together. i used to feel so sad when calls ended, sad enough that id just start avoiding them cuz i didnt really know when it would happen again, SO? thats like A WHOLE ENTIRE DAY.... we spent a whole day together and it went GOOD it was so .. perfect. such a big deal to me cuz like. i dont leave my house, i dont SOCIALIZE REALLY.. so to go for so long without even getting tired?? its genuinely a really big step for me. HE DID THAT...

but.. dont just love them for how they make me feel. i love everything about them. when shit gets hard i wanna try my best to be there cuz ive had people give up on me and it fucking sucked, i wont ever give up on you. they really are so special to me like. the best people ive ever met in my entire life and i MEAN that. you are so worth it, anything at all. ill be here!!! i wont ever leave you behind, how could i ever do that? my love doesnt come from what they do for me, it comes from THEM directly. their personalities, their hobbies, interests. glasses get rosier, theres nowhere id rather be! it feels so good to just.. idk. i like being here, i feel stable and comfortable and its all thanks to them

MAN dont talk to me ever. never speak to me!!! lot of feelings okay but. listenn..... ive got two eyes, one for each apple. EASY. lovemaxxing or whatever

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momiamtired · 1 month

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i think this world just plays sick jokes with me. i really dont think i will be able to survive if ill continue to live like this. its not that bad i mean i have water, food, house, im studying. its just that i know what i could have. its unfair. i cant believe how unfair this world is. i know some people struggle much more but tbh i cant give a shit ab other people right now. my mental health was awful even before going to this country but right now i just cant believe how awful this all idea with abroad education could be. i had so much hope of going to see my family this summer, to see my cat, my friends, my friends who are able to come to my country only this summer. i just want to be a kid again. i just want to be free again. i just want to be happy again. im tired of all of this im tired so so so much. i have my finals soon. i guess i wont be able to even smile at that period. i miss my previous life. i never thought this all could become like this, my mind is going crazy too. my dad had ocd and it inherited to me ig so i always struggled with anxiety. now my mind tries to explain everythhing that happens to me with some logic or pattern and it feels like im going crazy. i pray every night even tho i dont believe in god. its just my mind trying to tell me that this world can not be that cruel and 100% there is some explanation to what is happening to me. i remember last time i experienced something like this when i was 15 and war only started and i would sit all day in my phone constantly and i cried a lot. i hated my life there bc i didnt do anything except sitting in the phone all time and i lived like this for 2 month i believe? i guess the situation rn is not that bad. i play games with my friends, i have money and tasty food and i dont feel like a failure like i lfelt back there. it just for some reason when things start to get a tiny little bit better to me for some reason everything is ruining and things get so bad that i literraly want to kill myself. i may be too confidant saying this but i believe that if i get some more pressure on my life i will do it. i just cant keep living like this. i met a boy recently and everything was so good. it was one of little to no good moments i experienced here. then he started ignoring me. i have an awful self esteem, i never had a bf or been ignored by guys. i guess i see myself as absolute trash ugly cow and then for some reason be surprised seeing boys not paying me that much attention. then i got a letter that i need to do my biometrics. basically it means that i cant go home anymore. fuck there is car in front of my house i swear to god is this is my roommate i would believe that god is real and he is a fucking satan. i want to pee really bad too and my other roommate washing rn. with her bestfriend waiting for her in her room. i want friends too. she is listening to some pop music. i hate americans i wish they all could die. why some peopel experience what i experience and some of them live like this. i will never believe that she had troubles at least as bad as i had. i know it sounds like im some kind of a slave and pity myself but this is true. and i pity myself. i guess its normal to pity myself when the whole world is just fucking ur ass like a monster. anyways, i cant go back to my country(my only chanse of being happy in this year and the reason why i keep wking up), i hate myself, i hate my appearence, i hate all people around me, im jealous of all of them even when its something small, im failing all of my classes, i dont have friends, the only boy i thopught i was good enough for and we had a good time and i genuanly liked him just ignored me and i decided to give him another chance and we are supposed to meet tomorrow but he said he will tell me when yesterday at the evening or today in the morning and he didnt tell me anything so i guess i lost him too, i have severe anxiety, i have money anxiety?, i dont know english and every time i speak with someone i feel so embarresed bc i always thinks i did something wrong or said something so they think

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hourlyanin · 1 year

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365/365

it's only 2 hours left before the 2022 end. after went through a lot of things, i cant believe i was be able to be here today. it has never been easy since forever, but im so proud of myself for endure it all well. so many things happened this year.

start from January 2022, it was the first time of me as a senior high school student going to school with full capacity since the pandemic start. i had a very hard that time. i used to cry on the way of going to school. i was tiring and i feel so bad for my dad. for made him to go through this kind of situation.

"if i were smart enough, dad wouldnt be this tired"

it might be difficult to me but honestly it was worth to be remembered. i made a lot of memory there, with my fellow mipa satu friends. it was a short time yet im so happy for meeting them. spatsa will always be missed

2. move to the February 2022, it was the month when i moved the new school which closest than before from house. smale. it was February 14th. the valentine days. i didnt celebrate it but it was the day when i feel so loved by God. i still can believe what's happening. i was screaming like insane even though i was puasa that time. "i have never felt this happy in my life" said me that time.

but just after one day after move the new school, i got sick. i was trying to adjusting myself in the new environment while enduring my pain on my stomache. it was a very difficult but thanks god Roschan helped me a lot that time

3. March 2022, finally moved to the new school. it was tough either because right after i went to school for the first time, my fellow friends whom i just met got a covid. i was tested for it but thanks god the result is negative. my school back to PJJ once again but on February 26th march my school announced that student are allowed to back to school again. when the first time i entered the class it felt so strange. i was so afraid that people wont accept me. i had a lot of bad thoughts which kill me inside. but thanks god i met a lot of nice person there. they welcomed and treat me so well hence i didnt feel lonely anymore. it was also the day when i finally met chan for the first time. he greeted me first.

4. April 2022, i had been spending a lot time talking with can in this period. we are getting close and closer than before. we used to share everything and here i am start to catch a feeling with him. i was hestitate at first but i made the first move and stuff then. it was a frustarting and fun phase at the same time but i enjoy it all. really

5. May 2022, we ended up together and celebrate our first Eid together. it was also the month of our first date. we went to Kota Kasablanka and watch a Doctor Strange. it was so awkward we cant even talk properly that time. we were too shy and afraid to make each others felt uncomfortable. we ate on Es Teler 77 either

6. June 2022, we are getting more comfortable. we went to mall and spend a good time there. it was the month when you kissed my cheek for the first time hehe. i was running because of shy

7. July 2022, i didnt remember it well but this month is one of worst one. we hurt each others and it caused a misunderstanding between us. we almost lose each others but our urge to stay together is bigger than it.

8. August 2022, i was sick right before ur birthday. i was caught fever because of exhausted that time but i forced myself not to miss ur birthday even though my condition didnt well. i was not going to school but you constantly said you miss me and want to see me. that things made me want to get better asap. i want to say happy birthday to you as a person than anyone

9. September 2022,

10. October 2022

11. November 2022

12 December 2022

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clayisdead204 · 2 years

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The Truth

i am no one i cannot do this anymore over the cource of time i realised lying to others is easiest thing in the world what isnt thou is lying to your ownself i have been lying non stop to others since i got to a age of making sense of the presence of self and others in layman language you can say since 5th or 6th grade . i did not have a difficult childhood i had a pretty normal childhood like others thou yeah my mother had depression at that time even before that so yeah i have here there memories of her shouting and crying but those are very few memories in general i had everything normal . we came to ambala back when i was in 3rd grade i made some great friends but since the beginning i could not score i just did not like studying i found it a huge burden i was and am awful at maths even basic calculations dad used to shout and hit me on my head and shout in my face every sunday since 3rd grade to what i remember is 7th grade then he used to just check on me once a month and realize what a failure i was being dumb at each subject usually were sundays cause only that day he had time for me to pay attention at me dont get me wrong he is not at all horrible he is the best father in the world just it was his badluck or something that he got me as his daughter he worked in a private sector so he works really hard and as he aint any billionaire he knows how cruel the real world can get i know how much he loves me and how he just tried to prepare me for the cruel reality the way that he could maybe he was not taught better maybe he didnt know better i dont know but i understand and never in the world would blame him but to speak my truth sundays are horrible till date to me i am not a depressed person you know who you can just see crying or anything all time but somewhere still whenever i remember those sundays till my 10th grade how each sunday i was so scared that dad would start shouting or hitting me telling me how dumb i am and how i will fail and not be able to pass or even the days after ptm the silence in the car way back . but the most horrible of it all was that the very next day dad again smiled and felt sorry for shouting at me or hitting me i could see that he still believed in me somewhere the most horrible was that he still didnt give up on me never every sunday he would shout hit say things to me but every other day he was back to trusting me loving me and being the best father that he is . then i passed 10th got into 11th and now my parents started fighting horribly i hate it i hate it i hate ittt!!! i am so tired of them fighting it came to being so horrible and mom will need to leave now . its not like i am shocked or anything i always knew how there was no real love between my parents how they were just together for the sake of it like most of the indian couples but all this fighting has made me weak and my helplessness makes it even more horrible how i could never do anything from the time that i was kid till today to stop their fights they fighted always just earlier it was not every sunday it was like once in 2 months horrible fights ending up with mom getting depressive seizures where she would cry or shout or just like paralyze and i would just cry and cry and run to other houses get help or call nani aur masi to help i remember mom being on this medicines made her sleep alot i would just be in the room watching tv alll alone again its not like anythign special i had trauma or anything like any other kid i would go in evening to park play with other kids but i remember being more overly excited to go to the park no matter what was happening around me i didnt care if it was raining or parents were fighting or i had a exam nothingg would stop me and its still like that i always have this overly urge to leave the house i didnt quite understand why i was like this i knew other kids they were also excited to go out . and once i went to play i would not return before like it was awfully dark and again same is with me now

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jennymay · 2 years

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i feel horrible.

im not suicidal anymore. i dont have the mental capacity to be. i have too many things to worry about. thinking about dying one day honestly filled me with so much relief. now it does nothing. i cant kill myself. benji and bella would never recover emotionally from my death. its just them id worry about. everyone else will move on. i know if i wasnt alive it would affect alot of people. possibly ruin their lives. so i would never. but i hope the price of being selfless pays off.

i feel guilty for even writing about it. knowing how my death would really crush others. espeically kayla. shed never come back if i offed myself. so i will not. my love for my siblings is stronger than anything else but sometimes the bad times are so overpowering that i dont care.

when i first considered killing myself, i remember i was in my first bedroom at lake munmorah. i was watching my mad fat diary for the first time. school was horrible. jaymie was my best friend and she was always with emily. i wasnt that close with anyone but jaymie. however....thankfully, i had tianah. she talked to me all night. and i mean all night. telling me my death would destroy people. and i knew that but i needed someone to tell me. i needed to be reminded and she reminded me. the next day was rough. going to school with cuts under my sleeve and i just felt like absolute shit. of course id smile and be the funny one. everyone has a job to do.

the second time, the real attempt, was humiliating. i was in my bedroom playing gta. mum and dad had a fight. no one was home and dad left. he didnt tell me where he was going he never does when hes angry. he just leaves. like mum did a few days prior. kayla was with jake and moustafa was out being a teenager. it felt like i was the only one left to suffer. dramatic but its how i felt. i took a bunch of pills and cut my wrists and thighs. i felt nothing. my tear stained cheeks and the swallowed pills. the blood was running so i just covered it with my jumper not caring about the mess it would leave. surely ill be dead soon right ?????

not sure what i expected. but it wasnt what i received. i started to get very very dizzy. i played gta as i waited for my death to come. which is insanely dumb. really, what was i thinking?? i was a kid anyway. i sat there and played my game. the screen started to move and everything was lagging. i looked around and everything was blurry. it felt like i drank an entire bottle of vodka. no pain, just so dizzy and so so tired. i started to get scared. the thought of dad coming home to me dead on my bed scared me. and im glad it did. he wouldve been more traumatised than he already is.

i got scared so i texted jaymie and tianah. tianah told me i didnt take much so ill be fine. she didnt seem to care. or so i thought. jaymie cared alot. she was worried. but then she said she was going to send emily to my house. i told her id never talk to her again if she called anyone for help. which was cruel for me to do. but i was wanting to die, forgive me for not thinking straight.

i called an ambulance. the operator was nice. she stayed on the phone with me. i saw my dads white ute pull up in the driveway and i freaked out. i told the operator i was scared and my dad was coming and hes going to be angry at me. because i truly thought he was going to hit me really hard. call me a bunch of names and make me wish i went through with it. the operator was worried but i told her i had to leave. she asked if my dad hit me and i said "no. i have to go" and i hung up on her.

my heart was racing but i had no other options i couldnt even think straight. i had to tell dad an ambulance was coming for me. and to be honest i dont even remember making the call, i just remember the nice operator. dad came through the door and i couldnt help but smile out of embarrassment. i explained to him a few times what was happening because he kept asking me like he didnt understand. he was either shocked or i was dozing off mid convo. he forced me to sit on the lounge and he went outside and made some calls, but poking his head in to check on me every few seconds.

he came in and told me to wait outside with him. i remember sitting in his ute in the driveway. he left the door open for me. i kept nodding off and kept waking me. i didnt want to fall asleep either, i was scared. but i couldnt stop dosing off. eventually the ambulance came and things got really blurry. i remember the paramedics were two males. they got me into the ambulance and layed me down on the bed. they asked me questions i dont remember. probably like what i took. i had barely any answers for them. i dont know what happened outside the ambulance but mum suddenly jumped in. felt like i was asleep and this was a nightmare. she was drunk. slurring, smudged mascara and a bright red face.

"kloe, dont you know i fuckin take these for my bipolar. you took my medicine" she said something along the lines of that. she was annoyed i took them. she was saying this as she was in the passenger seat of the ambulance. i was just watching her terrified. then the ambulance told her to step out. when they came back in (alone, no mum) they started to talk about her. i cant remember what but they were judging mum. i remember seeing flashes of kaylas worried face and my aunty sam. i kept dosing off and the paramedics didnt stop me from sleeping, so i let it go and fell asleep.

the next thing i remembered was being in the emergency part of the hospital. i had my phone and was trying to text jaymie/tianah that i was ok because they were worried and i scared the shit out of them. the nurse told me to put my phone away, i was trying to explain i had to message my friends to tell them i was alive. but she cut me off and said "your friends can wait".

they wheeled me somewhere, to a room where other patients were in but it was quite private. they made me change into a gown. everyone had left me, i was still half awake half asleep. a nurse came in and ripped open my gown. by reflex i gasped and quickly covered myself. she softly and gently grabbed my hands and moved them and she gave me a smile saying she needs to put monitors on my chest. so there i was, titties out and all, with heart monitors stuck to my chest.

i remember dad coming back, and there was another doctor. he told me i could go home and i need to eat. he told me to take care of the wounds. my dad looked at the doctor confused and said "what wounds". the doctor looked at me and i shamefully turned my wrist over, which had blood smeared all over it. i still feel guilty. ill never forget my dads face when he saw it. his face dropped and his shoulders did a bit too. he exhaled and looked away quickly. i felt really bad at that point.

we got into the ute and i didnt know what to say. so i asked dad for mcdonalds. he said yes of course. and he said it the nicest hes ever said it. we got home and i ate my food in my room with the door open. dad was watching me from the lounge room. it came to bed time and i told him im going to sleep. i closed my door and got under the covers. he came in 5 minutes later and said "no ones home. just leave this door open yeah?" he said it casually but i know why he wanted it open.

i wish i never did that.

#suicide #dad #diary entry

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lolita-lollipop · 3 years

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Hizashi and Aizawa kidnapping a young teenage girl, and her bonding and quickly finding comfort with Hizashi, leaving Aizawa to awkwardly attempt at being super soft and all the more gentle to his sensitive little girl, his heart panging with pain every time she flinches or cowers away from him. “You don’t need to be scared of me, kitten.. please”

your little acts of favoritism weren’t necessarily intentional, you hated both of them. they were your brothers teachers, and whoop dee doo, they kidnapped you. but... you liked hizashi more.

it was just something about him that made you believe he was some form of comfort item, probably because he wasnt brooding, and didnt have a mean face, and he was the first human yud ever seen in this place, that all combined into one and he became your rock, your shoulder to cry on. he was just... so nice, although his quirk was loud, somehow he managed to speak softly with you. it was such a bright contrast to at home where two firey blondes always scream at each other, and your father tries to calm it down.

on your first night ever here, you had tried to jump out the window, and were captured by the thick scarves you once admired, hed lectured you, yelled at yiuu even, all you could see were those red eyes of his, and hear his voice. and he scared you, he scared you so much. i guess it justtranslates to now, first impressions are everything, and to you, he looked like a big scary man who would yell at you.

eventually, you stopped caring about how you hated him, or how you wanted to leave, as you clearly never were. so, instead of glaring at them, or crying, you accepted the fact that he was taking care of you. hizashi, hizashi was taking care of you... aizawa though? no way in hell, he was just so... you'd never seen him with a smile, he never tried to talk to you, he just kinda watched you, and it freaked you out, at some point you started believing he was trying to kill you, don't even ask how you came up with that conclusion.

you just couldn't manage to warm up to hi as you'd done so quickly with hizashi, and it showed. you were always tense when alone with him, like he was going to jump out at you any second and stab you, you didnt talk to him , sometimes you felt so anxious around him that you would outright start crying, shaking in some form of fear, or hide yourself under a blanket. although hizashi was proud that you loved him so much, he knew that this was hurting his husband, that his own little girl was scared of him.

so he would always try to coax you into doing things with him, saying things like "can your papa come and help" or "how about we have papa do this with you while I make lunch?", just trying to get him included so you would feel just as comfortable around him as you were with his own self. Sometimes he just left the room to let you have alone time with him. He’d even lectured his husband about how he always looked angry, and that he has to smile form time to time, and not the creepy “I’m gonna kill a villain” smile.

And so Aizawa started trying, not trying to be like hizashi, even that was too much for him, but trying to be nicer, he was a gentle person when he wanted to be, so this came with ease for him, he would tuck you in at night, read you stories, hold you if you cried, feed you, help you bathe (which you usually liked hizashi to do, and in general, inserted himself as a gentle roger in your life. You would expect taht this would work, that because he was so nice to you, because he was so sweet like hizashi, you would accept him as your father.

But nope! Again, first impressions are everything to you, and now, he was written off as the villain of you story, now, you jsut ran off to papa whenever he was around, and didn’t even give him the chance to hang around you, it just made it worse honestly, because now, not only did he look scary, but he also looked fake, which is never good. Every time he would try to if you, you would clutch onto hizashi for dear life, acting like his hand would do nothing but burn you.

Tears would cloud your vision, and he would pulle back, not wanting to cause you any more pain, and jsut stare in. Pure jealousy at his husband, who cooed and gave you a hug.and guess what? You hugged him back, and hid yourself in his chest, willingly, without a fight, without a tear, instead with a smile, most of the times mic wouldn’t interfere, wbatigg ns this to everyone a safe space for you, a place where you should naturally do things, but sometimes, he would give you little bushes int he right direction. Like disappearing completely for my he house so you’ll be forced to talk to Aizawa.

This is one of those times.

Yo been wandering the house for about ten minutes now, waking up form a nap, to find mic absent from his usual place in the rocking chair at your bedside. It was a little after lunchtime, and they’d only given you a small cup of fruit for breakfast (intentional, from mic), you were fairly hungry, and usually he was there to give you food, but you had no idea where he was, you had heard the… other one on the phone in their shared office, but you did not want to talk to him right now.

Aizawa could tell you were awake by the fact that all of the cats were meowing like crazy, and little pattering footsteps had followed his hearing around, mic had left abruptly, probably some little plan of mischief again, he was hizashi after all. He was just waiting for you to either 1: go back to bed, or 2: come to him for help. Mic had specifically told him to follow these rules for after nap time, so he did. And grew progressively more worried as over twenty minutes, trying to read through his students grading work, too distracted by the urge to go find you to accomplish anything.

His worries dissipated though when he saw your little head poking through the door, cat in hand, confused and tired looking, small tears beginning to prick th corners of your eyes, little sniffling sounds left you. His wha specked up form the desk, you’d given up walking around the whole house, your restarting had slowly pent up, you couldn’t manage to find him, and you were so hungry.

“Oh- hey honey, I didn’t know you were up. Do you need something?” He questioned, smiling intently at you, you just inched back into the door frame, breathing heavier by the moment, your hands shook and your head felt like it was going to explode at any point. Youbcontenoajted runnign back to your room and waiting till mic came out where you could hear him, but your stomach grumbled, reminding you how hungry you really are.

“I’m- im looking for daddy. Where is he.” You spoke, a very hushed tone overtook your words, making them almost inaudible for him. His face sunk slowly, he tougher you were actually gonna come for him, but the he remembered taht patience is key, and that he shouldn’t get mad, because it is t your fault taht you’re just a little sensitive, too fragile to handle more than one attachment, he gets it. He jsut at least wanted you to look at him, instead did your little feet, I’m Ayer if you could meet his eyes the. You would see how much he loves you.

“Oh, he left a. Little while ago. Is there something you need from him? Your papa can give him a call if you want, you could even talk to him!” He exclaimed excitedly, plastering that happy smile across his face to seem more inviting, liek mic had told him to do. He stood out of his chair, rounding up the papers and putting them in his file folders.you tried to sink back furthers, almost disappearing behind the doorway, you shook your head aggressively, almost running off, then yet again, your stomach made another noise, and forced you to stay.

“I- no. I’m- im hungry-“ you spluttered, not caring if it was embarrassing that you were stuttering so much, you just wanted food. And calling mic would just get you a lecture on how you could’ve just asked your papa, the same thing would happen whenever you went to uncnecesary lengths to avoid the man, your daddy would make sure you knew that it made him feel bad, while you’d at there bored. Not caring, at all.

“Oh- well you should’ve told me sooner kitten, if I’d known I would be up already. Cmon, let’s go to the kitchen, your daddy made you some food earlier” he spoke, rising from his chair slowly, you cowered slightly as he walked over, clutching the little kitten right to you for comfort, he mewed and snuggled closer, completely asleep. The man sighed when he saw you backing away from his grasp, he knew you were still scared. But he was just so impatient… he was tired of waiting, he wanted to hold you, even if it was jsut foena few minutes. He needed it feel you there with him.

Is he acted quickly, moving in a matter of seconds, he swooped his arm under your leg, and hooked his other around your torso, pulling you straight up into his grasp. Youu huh froze, his hands felt cold as ice on your skin, like they were burning you, immediately after he started walking, it snapped you out of it and you threw a fit. You dig your fingernails into his skin, and kicked and flailed in a panic, still trying to keep the little kitten in your lap safe. A full blown panic washed over you, clogging all your senses.

The dam holding back tears form your eyes crashed, and immediately you were sobbing, biting at his shoulder to let you go, he tried to rub your back to calm you down a bit, but just made it worse, as his hands felt like living anxiety creeping up and down your spine. He didn’t know what to do, let you ride it out, andkk no possibly have you get sick because of how much your crying in an empty stomach? Or let you down and go straight back to square one.

Your veined felt like pure ice had flooded in them, and it felt liek someone was repeatedly jabbing you in the head with tiny needes, fear was jsut so prominent in your sense, it overcame you, and made you whimper and scream.

“Whoah, breath for me alright? I just want to hold you. I’m not going to hurt you okay? I would never hurt you. Kitten… you don’t have to be scared of me” he spoke, trying to keep a proper computers, he wanted to cry with you, he wasn’t a very soft or emotional man but honestly, he was so upset with himself already, this was jsut pushing him for the edge. You cried, and cried, at some point you weren’t even crying and screaming at him, more with him. He held you close, you’d stopped the struggle almost five minutes ago, letting him hold you. It was odd. It almost felt… nice.

“I-I’m sorry. I’m being stupid again” You alien through your remaining little hiccups, shove my your face into his shirt, smelling the woody scent he carried around with him. He cooed, letting you hide yourself from him, savouring this soft moment was of top priorirty in his head… you jsut looked so sweet, so different from those harsh cries that would sound usually whenever he came around.

Who would think, shouts aizawas hand couldn’t feel nice? The same ones that had just been burning you, the ones that made you scream, felt like a breeze on a spring day, he actually felt warm, he felt like happiness, like contentment.

“No hon, it’s not stupid. Your scared. I know that, we all get scared and it’s not a bad thing, I love you, I really, really love you kitten. Just know that” he continued on with his little speech, leaving down to kiss you in the forehead, Jsut to be suprised when you didn’t flinfh, you were too tired to be scared; and too hungry, plus, he was really warm, the cat had pretty much snuggled up to him already, who says you shouldn’t.

“I- um- I love you… to?” You spoke, more of a question than anything, you’d spent so long Harding him that you didn’t know if you even could love him, it didn’t even feel possible, then again, you litterally cling to hizashi like a koala, and your mental state has relaly said “swoopity swoop” and scattered itself everywhere. Maybe having two comfort items was actually better than one… huh.

“Well, let’s go eat then. All taht crying probably made you tired, I’ll let you watch a movie in my office, you can watch pinto again, I know you love taht one. Cmon, let’s go” he spoke, and started walking again, you cuddled closer to him as he did, smiling slightly at the warmth. Hizashi was very extravagant, exiting, and hyper, this man felt very cool, calm, it was such a dark contrast, but it worked so well. You jsut… you Jsut liked it.

Well… now we’ll just have to wait and see who’s the favorite

———————————————————————————————————

Thank you for requesting! It was super fun to write and had me feeling super happy when I finished :)

I’m thinking about doing yandere todoroki family asks, because I’m litterally in love with @i-cant-sing one… so, requests are open for those if you want to put them in (please do I’m begging)

Anywho, have the most wonderful to days today! Goodbye!

#platonic obsession #platonic yandere #soft yandere #yandere my hero academia #yandere platonic #yandere #yandere poly #yandere erasermic #yandere Aizawa #yandere hizashi #yandere hizashi yamada #yandere shouta aizawa #yandere present mic #yandere eraserhead #yandere x reader

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cynettic · 3 years

Text

Stay with Me pt.3

Summary - You manage to escape from Scaramouche, if only for a moment before you realize there’s no escape. It only takes until you’re sitting back in your regular spot that you know what you need to do.

Pairings - Kitsune!Reader x Yan!Scaramouche

Warnings - Suggestive content, mentions of death, swearing, slight gore / blood

A/N - Its really hard to make this depressing while I’m vibing to Rasputin. Like no joke- I have it on one of the 1 hour playlists :D

Here you’ll find - pt.1 and pt.2

He’d left a key.

Scaramouche didnt make mistakes, not while he had you captive in the vicinity of his bedroom. He didnt have room for mistakes, not when you were watching his every movement while he was in your line of sight.

Sure, he mightve killed a person or two in front of you, but those were necessary mistakes. There was a sign on the door, it specified not to enter. You’d understand that, right?

Thats what he thought at least, lulling himself into belief after belief that you’d be there waiting for him every time. That you’d welcome him with open arms, even if there were chains ensnaring your wrists. That you’d accept your fate at his hands and submit yourself to him.

The Balladeer was a fool.

He’d kept you there for too long, and while you searched for an easy way to escape, time sent your head spinning. Into a spiral that begged only for the wind against your face, back laying on dirt with the familiar chirping up birds waking you up in the morning.

You wanted to go outside.

And when push comes to shove, you had to risk a little more to make it happen. Lure him into bed with kisses while your hands unbuttoned his vest. But what he believed to be alluring contacts was just your way of finding the keys hidden in the back pocket of his shorts.

It wasnt hard to find the one to your cuffs while he was asleep, cuddled in your chest with both arms around your waist as if to get you to stay put. You took the key, hiding them back in his clothing and hoping he didnt notice.

He didnt say anything the next day.

You werent going to wait any longer.

“Oh for fucks sake, why won't the goddamn door open?”

The room was left in tatters behind you, a little gift for Scaramouche once he got back. Turns out a pair of chains can smash up a lot of things, and rage can be used as a great source of strength when contained for such a long time.

But you’d done more than throw the blankets around, cut up the drawers and smash open the windows. Because your fists had bled red when you punched through the glass, puncturing your skin. Your knuckles were an ugly red, bruising already.

Ah, Scaramouche deserved a much better gift.

Gruesome as it was, you rubbed your knuckles against the pale walls. Till the blood stopped coming, till there was a nice little message for the boy which you held so dearly to your heart.

‘Balladeer.’

The first time you’d found out about him being a harbinger he’d told you not to call him by that name. You weren’t someone he associated with by work, you were a treasure to him. That’s why you continued to call him as he pleased, although the temptation always arose.

You were no longer his.

Shoving the door with your hand again, palm fiddling with the handle and groaning when it hardly budged. “Stupid,” you grumbled when the knob began to loosen. Backing up, you charged with your shoulder to the door, full force as the momentum broke the hinges. The door fell down with you along with it.

It was expected, you’d been stuck in the room for a long time, and thats considering you’d sat on the ground for decades. Your body was slight numb, muscles sore and unused for so long.

“You a-arent supposed to leave your room!”

A young man stood in the hallway along with a woman who looked relatively the same age. The two were wearing uniforms, flinching when you stood up from the debris and off the door. “Excuse me?” You asked, voice unnecessarily icy and stern. But you couldnt care less, you were going to get out of this house, damn anyone who stood in your way.

They both continued to shake when you walked towards them, staggering from side to side. The woman stepped up in front of the man, presenting a brave face. “If you leave the mansion, the harbinger will kill us all!”

“Well then I expect you should be on your way then. Actually…” you gestured to the maze of hallways. “You can lead the way.”

“What…?”

Your hand went limp to your side, an exasperated looking momentarily crossing your face before you sighed. “Im not staying trapped in that room, I’m sorry if that ruins your life, but frankly you're not the one stuck in there are you?” You took an extra step just to intimidate them, eyes wide to make the appearance of crazy. “It would be a great help if you showed me where he hid my vision too.”

“We can show you to the door…” The man began, “But the whereabouts of your vision are unknown, he wouldnt tell us something like that.”

A gift bestowed from the gods, a piece to help me thrive with my ambitions and pursue my goals.

Gone.

You really wished you’d taken to clawing out Scaramouche’s face instead, but you’d take what you got. Right now your main priority was getting out of this place, even if it meant leaving a piece of you behind.

“Door.” Your voice was raspy and there was a terrible feeling that crawled up to your throat, but you didnt have time to be emotional. “Show me where the door is… please.”

The conflict in their eyes dissipates by the time they lead you along, mumbling words between themselves. You didnt bother to try eavesdropping, you were so, so tired. You wanted to go home.

Anywhere. Anywhere but here.

It took a few minutes until you were standing in front of a grand door, almost twice the size of you and just as wide. You then began to notice the decorational plants and furniture that filled the empty space, there wasn't an inch of dust. Even though you could tell none of it was used.

“Hurry,” the man warned when you paused. “I dont know when our master is coming back, but if its soon, we’ll all be screwed.”

You couldnt feel your head as you numbly nodded, hand clenching the knob and flinging the set of doors open. “Thank you,” you merely mumbled, taking your first step out of the house in what felt like forever.

The days after that were a blur, the area around Scaramouche’s house were nothing but void. Empty and filled with forests and vast plains. You knew he didnt like people or socializing in general, but to this extent?

Your only option was to run.

Let your feet take you somewhere, anywhere. It was a constant pattern of running and taking breaks, leaning on a tree and gasping in a few breaths before you were again scurrying through the forest.

And yet you felt better than you’d felt in past months that you’d been stuck with Scaramouche.

Food became any boar you came across, the claws you’d spent so long hiding with Scaramouche coming to unleash a wrath beyond your comprehension. Till the animal was cut to shreds and no meat was left even to eat. You’d slaughtered it, without intention to eat or benefit for it, you’d killed it just to kill.

“I’m sorry,” you’d sobbed into the ground where you’d buried the harmless animal. Forehead pressed into the dirt as you pleaded for forgiveness to whatever archons would accept it. You couldn't even remember what archons you were supposed to pray to. “Forgive me- forgive me…”

But eventually you found your way around to somewhere you knew. Territory of Inazuma where you could find your way back, back home.

Where was home?

You’d been on the run from the vision hunt decree, abandoning your post for the Kitsune Saiguu for such a thing. Even now that you could return without a vision and as no threat under the decree…

You’d sacrificed everything for your vision.

Where were you to go now…?

Rain patted down, the trees providing only a slight cover as stray drops fell into your matted dirty hair. You didnt mind, it hid the tears that slid down your lifeless face, feet taking you into the far meadows of your hometown. Till you plopped down underneath a tree, knees curled to your chest and arms hugging them close. You were crying.

You were home.

____________________

“Awh,” a ginger haired murmured, elbow resting on the cool wood of the tabletop. “Is little Mouchie sad? I heard your kitty cat escaped~”

A death wish, even fatui that idly minded themselves around the bar knew it. Sipping cold drinks and swirling their cups, the soft chatter was nothing but a distraction from the main course of events. That being the smaller Harbinger who sat sulking in his seat, hunched over with a drink in hand. He’d drank far more than what was on the counter, but everytime he finished a glass, he’d smash it on the ground, watching the fragile glass shatter into pieces.

“I dont have a cat,'' was his only response, tone daring Childe to pursue further. To give him a reason to start throwing the glass in his face instead.

And Childe was an idiot when it came to challenging someone.

“No cat?” The rest of the drink in the taller harbinger’s glass was gone when he threw his head back. “Hmmm, I cant think of what else could’ve had you so enraptured in returning home then~!”

Scaramouche didnt respond, uneven bangs shadowing the bags under his eyes. “Stronger,” he said instead, elbow on the counter and hand outstretched for something. When there was no movement from the man managing the wine, the harbinger looked up. “I need something stronger to drink,” he repeated, voice seething.

“Of c-course!”

The glass was nestled in Scaramouche’s palm in no time, fingers curling around the circular form to down it in seconds. The drink merely slid down his throat in one movement, alcohol burning his senses. It didn’t matter, he was numbed by the growing rage inside of him.

Finally, he turned to the ginger haired boy, eyes hazily dancing along the counter till it reached his fingertips. Up his hand and along his arm, till Scaramouche was staring right into Childe’s eyes. “They escaped,” he admitted softly. “But it’s alright, because I sent something that’ll bring them back.”

Childe paused, raising his drink up away from his lips to pose a question. Hesitation danced along his features before he brought the glass back, he’d rather not provoke the shorter male any further. Wasn’t like he could interfere anyway.

____________________

“That… that…”

It was preposterous, having returned to that same spot for a day or two and heading back to the hometown you’d once lived in. The one Scaramouche had lived in. There shouldn’t have been an issue, you were solely gathering supplies for the sake of it, ambition driving you to travel far far away.

Out of Inazuma.

It was your new beginning, convincing yourself that you didn't need a vision. Finding some sort of purpose before Scaramouche shattered the vision and your life along with it. You’d seen how people had reacted when it had been ingrained in the statue, neutralized and broken. They lost hope, purpose and aspirations for anything new.

It’s not like the Raiden Shogun took my vision.

But you’d taken that fact for granted, expecting some sort of new start without Scaramouche. A victory, getting away from him just for a split second and getting out of Inazuma altogether, you’d never see him again.

Until you got his message.

“How the hell…” You crushed the note until it was just crumbled paper in your hand, slowly leaning on the stone wall. “Piece of shit… what kind of person even…”

Not only did he manage to find you, but without making his presence known, he’d tugged at your one weakness with an ease that had you down on your knees.

You threw the paper to the ground, deliberate as you stared past the alleyway. Pensive as you considered your options. Damn, what options did you even have? You’d been an idiot to underestimate Scaramouche, he wasn’t a child, you knew that… but archons he seemed like one when he was with you. Shown you a vulnerability he wanted only you to see. But maybe that had been part of his plan all along, until all you believed was his soft demeanor.

He may act like a child, but he’s a harbinger.

You stared down at the crumbled piece of paper in disgust.

Not only that, but he has no regard for human life.

Either way, you’d lived decades more than him. You could face him, you would present yourself to him just as he expected you to. Even when everything in you rejected the idea, sobbed at the thought of returning to that house, those chains. Being locked up and confined only for the purpose of coddling a small boy, a selfish boy, a cruel boy.

Deep breath in, deep breath out.

You’d figure out a way, and this time you wouldn’t rule out the option of his death.

———————

Oh darling Y/n, how have you been?

I hope this letter reaches you rather soon, we both have much to discuss, no? About me, about you, and much more. You see, I’ve taken up quite a distaste to your little friends. Stone statues in Inazuma as small as Kitsunes truly hold no purpose, what will they do, come back to life? Haha, I should think not. I’ve already arranged to have them demolished, who knows what kind of material they might possess. Ah, and of course I’d show you the finishing product, unless you’re willing to come and have a chat with me once more? Under the Sakura tree like we used to, you’ve waited years, I believe you can wait for me?

I hope this letter reaches you in best interests. I’m always looking out for you after all.

Sincerely, your Balladeer

——————

It was raining.

Beautiful weather as you lay sitting there, feet crossed and tucked in the same you’d often do. After all, there was no need to fear the vision hunt decree or the Raiden Shogun. Let them come, let them take care of you before Scaramouche did.

You werent cold, not when the cold drops dampened your clothing, slipping down the length of your spine and drenching your face. Despite having lived in a luxury residency for such a long time, this was where you were most comfortable, enduring whatever the weather had for you, taking it with a smile. Because you were waiting…

The Kitsune Saiguu was a distant memory.

You were waiting for Scaramouche, the young boy that often bound into the field in lengthy strides, childlike wonder in his eyes. The one who’d cried when the other kids pushed him away, the one that just wanted to be praised. You’d held him in your arms, and now, even knowing the results, you wouldnt have done differently.

He was just a boy.

Just a boy when he joined the fatui, looking for praise that he was given. He created chaos and bellowed orders with a cruelty that was highly looked upon. Told that he was doing well, so he continued to do so.

He’s just a boy.

You wished you’d held him in your arms, if not only for a tad longer. Shield him away from the wrongness of the world, if only for one last time.

Banishing away your hatred for him was hard.

But you found it under the tree, rain soon dimming down to a clouded cold breeze that swept through the meadow. You’d hated him while stuck in the mansion, but you could now see it from a larger point of view. What he did was wrong of course, but you could remember him so vividly now. His small form giggling, tiny arms around your neck.

“Play with me!”

Was it your fault?

For not holding him tighter? For trying to rectify his bad doings and teach him what was wrong and right? Maybe if your grip was firmer, if you’d spoken to him about the warmth he’d given you that day when playing cards...

“Lazy ass.”

Burying down that pile of worry and insecurities, you took a deep breath in to relax. The edge of your lip perked up, only slightly. “Still terrible with your social skills arent you?”

Slowly securing a dry space under the three with you, Scaramouche sat down. His features were the same ones you’d grown accustomed to at his mansion. Rich clothes, sharp eyes, and the baby face that refused to go away. His movements were soft as he pulled out a deck of cards. The two of you didnt speak as he distributed them between you both. It was tense… no, it felt too much like the warmth form long ago to be tense. You only wished the situation to be different.

“I love you.”

But you could only offer a bitter smile to his words. “I love my vision,” you replied. “I love the Kitsune Saiguu, and I love my friends.”

His touch was gentle when his fingers came to gently cradle your cheek. Holding your face dearly as he peered into your eyes, his were soft. Different from the cruelty he held within, the hatred that burned and destruction that seeked to explode.

You saw a little boy.

Your hand came to press his hand further against your cheek, till you slid his palm to your lips. He appeared so calm when you pressed the first kiss, lips tracing the lines along his palm with all the care in the world.

But you needed to change your view, see him as the man he now was. As the man he had become.

“I love you,” he repeated, and you let go of his hand. It fell limp by his side, cards all but forgotten. There was a much more pressing matter at hand, because you truly needed to see him as he was.

It was necessary if you planned to kill him.

#genshin impact #genshin impact hc #genshin impact headcanons #genshin impact oneshots #genshin impact fanfiction #genshin scaramouche #scaramouche x reader #kitsune reader #yandere scaramouche #genshin impact x reader #genshin x reader #reader x scaramouche #scaramouche angst #writing #angst

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designatedbreadbox · 3 years

Text

Demon! MC

your death was a tragedy. truly, it was. too young, too soon.

mammon wouldnt stop crying and belphie blamed lucifer........for whatever reason...

they knew you would come back. as a demon, preferably, but as an angel can work too. not like it would be a slight reminder of the Celestial War as if their current situation didnt already.

now, what you didn't know was that having pacts with the top 7 demons of hell would play a key role in what demon you would resemble.

You can back as an Avatar --- but of what? this is determined by your outlook on life.

if you felt more....alone, seperate, or overrall a pessimistic outlook, then you came back as the Avatar of Isolation.

felt more angry, or aggressive? everybody, welcome the Avatar of Devastation / Annihilation. prepare for global catastrophe.

^ people can be so cruel and harsh, wouldnt it be better to be by yourself? no can bother you, and you have all the time in the world. no nuisances, no hassles or stress. everyone always want a little more me time to themselves, so it should be considered a blessing that you can grant this to yourself at any time

^ the world is going to shit already, so who cares about a little more chaos? humans are tough, resilient, pesky little things, they can manage and survive. they always make a comeback somehow. they can always wish for the disaster to go away too.

this one is tricky: there's no clearcut way for you to become this avatar, but lying exists and so does manipulation, so it makes sense how you ended up as the Avatar of Domination.

^ behind every puppet is a master, and behind every master, is you. why do the work yourself when others can do it for you? all it takes is a few movements of the wrist and sweet words and everything can be taken care of for you. who wouldnt want that power?

and the next two potential Avatars you could become.... pulls at belphie's heart, a personal dagger to it, actually.

as proud as he is, he's also heartbroken; but not in a bad way.

when you walked up to them in the same place you first entered the devildom as the Avatar of Humanity, he broken down privately.

how could he face you? how could he call himself a friend still?

^ he recalls the day he killed you, and how you strangely didnt remember much of the event itself exceot for the fact that it happened. he recalled how awkward your friendship was in the beginning. he remembered it all, and it fed into his neverending guilt.

barbatos had to make a seperate space for you to test everything out, see where you fall amongst the 7 brothers.

^^ the fact that you held so much hope for humanity, your love for them was so great you were deemed fit to be the official gaurdian over them. the love belphie himself once had came rushing back at him. he liked how you held the hope he gave up years ago.

the other personal one is the Avatar of Vengeance/Revenge. this is a no-brainer.

^ he literally killed you. acting cordial for the sake of "peace" in the house gets tiring after so long. the anger and envy you felt towards him, towards everyone for forgetting something so traumatizing so easily was aggravating. you hated how easily belphie got over it without much thought to how you felt afterwards.

ovee the course of a few days, you had to battle them to see if you could best them.

among the top 3? technically top 4 now, but despite you being significantly younger than them in years, you're now an older sibling.

that means an even split between the younger and older brothers.

within the younger brothers? hehehe, younger sibling supremacy now that you officially joined the flock.

at the end of the day, they're all very happy and excited they get to see you again.

they'll brag you off. alot.

#obey me one master to rule them all #obey me #series #obey me luficer #om lucifer #om! lucifer #gn!mc #mammon obey me #om! mammon #obey me asmodeus #demon! mc #mc is gender neutral #obey me headcanons #mc headcanon

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technowoah · 3 years

Text

Taunt

It only takes one time to realize you fucked up.

- ANON REQUESTED!

- WILBUR X FEM! READER BLURB

PROMPTS!

50) "Fuck off... I mean it"

24) "Get in the car" "..." "please get in the car"

⚠︎ angst to fluff, swearing, based on the song Taunt by Lovejoy ❤🐈 its short btw yall

[Updated 3 hours after upload I messed up the prompts sorry yall now it fixed]

She was always asking if he was alright. He always lied to her just to get her off his back for the night, but it was his fault that he wanted her to move in. He has to deal with that all of the time, it was her fault anyways. She made him upset, she made him not alright. She didn't know that. She constantly complained about things that didn't even concern her, she dodged their relationship making it more about her than them.

It was tiring to him. Constantly providing, trying to tie a broken knot, but he didnt let that get in the way of his career, or his friends. There's another issue, he never talked to his friends about her. She accused him of not being proud of their relationship and that became a problem that never got resolved.

Did anyone ever say "no" to her? Well if no one did, he would be the first one to do so. Fuck that.

He listened, and listened, but nothing kept this relationship together.

Wilbur talked to the three people chatting on his discord through his headphones as a soft LED lights flowed through the room. These nights were simple because she didnt have to see him when he decides to stream, he basically has his time set out for himself without trouble. He wasn't ecstatic, he felt horrible, but the facadè was there.

Her on the other hand wasnt happy either. She never got attention from him, and of course she could get moody from time to time like every other human being, but she always took it out on him. Who else was gonna be there for her? He acted like her cared, she knew he was lying. His "caring" consisted of humming and him responding like a default character in a video game. He didn't care, he acted like he never did. She needed that attention and he knew damn well she did.

She wasnt asking for much, at least to her it did feel like it. She knew when she was wrong, but she didn't want to admit it when they were both in the wrong too. They dont get each other, she didnt know why he asked her to move in when he didn't want anything to do with her. Ever since he moved her in he kept her in check like a child, she hated and loved that at the same time. Its true that she wanted her own way, she did what she wanted and gave her attention to whoever she wanted her attention to be. She thought that was fine, but apparently she dosent give any effort to the relationship.

Rolling her eyes at the thought she decided to leave the dishes in the sink dirty. She thought about leaving and finding someone who will get her, yes Wilbur listened to her, but there was no effort. When he's drunk and tries to "figure out what makes her brain tick" ends up in more distaster.

Lying in the couch her mind began to wonder, he always said that she could get away with anything. She always took it as a taunt. Everytime it was brought up. He called it "pretty privilege" and he always taunts her saying she abuses that power.

Her jaw clenched as she recalled those memories. Summoning the courage she brought herself up onto her feet and rushed to their shared bedroom. Taking a deep breath she opened their closet and started pulling her things off of hangers, not caring if she made a mess. She tossed her clothes onto the messy bed that they didn't bother to make this morning.

Bringing a small backpack out from underneath the bed she tried shoving most of her clothes into a bag for a night. In total frustration she emptied the bag and only backed necessities that she would need for the night.

She was tired of him and he was tired of her so she was doing both of them a favor. She made her way out of the door grabbing a coat and sliding on some simple shoes. Shooting a quick text to a close friend letting them know she's coming over. Her friend wasn't that close, but she decided to walk. As she locked the door to their shared apartment she debated texting Wilbur. She didnt want to, but she didnt want him to freak the fuck out because she wasnt home.

( Wilbur )

Me: Ill be back for the rest of my stuff tmrw.

[Read]

She closed her phone and started on her night time journey down the street trying to let everything from the past few weeks go with the cool wind.

Him on the other hand stayed silent. He had just finished his stream and had gotten a text saying that she'll be back for the rest of her things. This was inevitable, one of them had to leave, but to him it didnt seem right. He didn't want her to leave. Something in his heart was making him chase her back, the same thing in his heart that moved her into his apartment in the first place. Maybe it was love, maybe he wanted to persevere and have someone in his life. Something in his mind was telling him that he let go of something special.

Wilbue thought about it as he shut everything off and went to go grab his belongings, before rushing out the door to try and find her. Sadly to his discovery, she turned off her location. He finally made it to his car and started driving towards his house to see if she was around there.

He couldn't call a friend because she never introduced her friends to him. She did that on purpose because of him not doing the same. As he drove down the not so busy streets of Brighton he thought if he could get to know her, pull emotions and feelings out of her and see the real her. And if he cant do that? Who knows what will happen.

He remembers this face she always pulled when he always said "Im alright." She scrunched up her nose in annoyance and he always took it as a taunt because he couldn't figure out the real meaning. They were both going at this the wrong way, he dosent know anything about her and maybe thats the problem, but she needs to calm down as well. She needs to start paying attention to both of them instead of herself.

He was seated at a stoplight until he saw a figure on the sidewalk walking past him. The person looked shocked then kept walking, but even faster this time. He rolled down the window to see it was Y/n walking. Wilbur ran the red light and found a place to turn the car around to follow her. He drove a couple of feet in front of her before putting his hazard lights on and stepping out of the car to confront her.

"What the fuck are you doing?!" Wilbur said while getting our of his car.

"Im getting away from you. And what are you doing here?" She said.

"Well I could ask you the same thing. Its not safe out here alone." He calmed down a little. Wilbur's main goal was to get her back home so they can have a civilized talk. He didn't want to be out here.

"Oh? Ive been fine for the past fifteen minutes." She sasser back.

"That dosent mean its not safe!" He exclaimed.

She stayed quiet so that gave Wilbur an opportunity to speak.

"See, I want us to go home so we can have a civilized talk without feeling defensive. I want to get to know you, I know you're my girlfriend and yes, it was my mistake rushing things. Im not putting the blame all on myself either." He finished and she stayed quiet with her arms crossed infront of her chest.

"Are you cold-?"

"Fuck off...I mean it." She said while trying to pass hin on the street.

He stood in her way and he kept doing that every time she tried to get around him. Wilbur saw that she was getting annoyed at his actions. Wilbur held her by both of her biceps trying to hold her still so he could talk.

"You're being childish!"

"Fucking listen to me! You cant just keep walking away from us! From me! This is not healthy!" Wilbur yelled. He let go if her and surprisingly she stayed there.

"Get in the car." He ordered but she stayed silent. "Please get in the car."

She turns around gets in the passenger seat if Wilbur's car. He sighed a sigh if relief and followed her lead. They both got settled into the car and he didn't move. He wasn't going to drive unless she talked to him. After a minute if silence she spoke up.

"I know its- its both of our faults. And i have some things I need to work on. I cant just run away. Also your thoughts of me need to be rearranged, but I need to give you all of me. At leat 50 percent so we can start somewhere. But Im sorry." She said while she looked down at her lap maybe in embarrassment.

In the end they both wanted to fix themselves. In the end they wanted eachother. And they can both see that.

He leaned over the armrest and gave her a kiss on her cheek. She turned to him with a surprise look on her face, like this was the most affection he gave her, because it was true. She grabbed his hand that rested on the armrest too as he started to drive towards their home together.

As the nightly drive continues on and now shes drifting off in the passenger seat as In Love With An E-girl plays softly. She's left too tired to talk with Wilbur and be in touch with her emotions right now, but she'll do it for the both of them this time.

#mcyt blurb #mcyt angst #mcyt fluff #mcyt x reader #mcyt headcanons #wilbur soot x reader #wilbur soot headcanons #wilbur soot blurb #wilbur x reader #irl wilbur soot x reader #wilbur soot x y/n #wilbur soot angst #mcyt x you #mcyt imagines #mcyt x y/n #wilbur soot x you

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peanut-in-the-goal · 3 years

Text

characters belong to @lumosinlove

Logan and Finn had been together for years. Still, neither of them were happy. Not as happy as they used to be. Some nights it felt like old times, when everything was new and fresh, that honeymoon period of their relationship back at Harvard.

The soft smiles and quiet laughter. The way their hands brushed together when they walked. They went on car rides, one of their favorite pastimes from when they wore the crimson colors that they had grown to love. Finn remembers what it was like those days. He and Logan were young and immature, in for it for the fun, only serious about the game.

They had a good rhythm about it. Any drama or arguments they left off the ice. The ice was their home, it always had been since they were young, at different rinks, in different cities. It was familiar, smooth, something that was reliable to not change too much.

The lines on the ice were recognizable anywhere, marking their territory. There was something about the adrenaline that raced through them when they stood on the ice, that feeling of carrying the puck at your stick and gliding along the ice.

It was magical. Something that you couldn’t forget no matter how long it’s been.

But Harvard was a long time ago, years ago. Some days it felt like they were treading on thin ice around each other, doing everything they could so the other wouldn’t just leave.

The love was still there, but it was fraying between them, like a blanket that was being ripped apart at the seams. It ripped slowly but they were never complete without the other half. No matter how hard they wanted it, this relationship wouldn’t save itself, the two of them were willing to put in the work, but even that couldn’t save them. They were losing each other.

Everything was tense and stressful, Finn couldn’t take it. He loved Logan, he knew he always would, but he couldn’t do this anymore. They couldn’t play this game anymore, acting like everything was fine when it so clearly wasn’t. He couldn’t bear to watch Logan slip away without trying to pull him back in.

But he had tried that already, hadn’t he? He wasn’t willing to go along with this anymore and work and work and work to fix things when Logan didn’t seem to care.

He wanted out. So he was going to call it off. He couldn’t put himself through this anymore, waking up and seeing Logan curled up on the other side of the bed when he used to be so close.

He was so tired of saying things were alright when they so clearly weren’t. So as much as it pained him to say it, it was over. It hurt to love someone who made no show of loving him back.

That plan didn’t last very long.

Finn had been trying to find the right time to tell Logan, the days seemed to just drag on. Soon days were becoming weeks. He was starting to second guess himself, so either do it now or do it never.

He chose the former.

Finn decided to just tell him, choke down his nerves and tell Logan that this wasn’t working out. He swallowed, clearing his throat to get Logan’s attention.

“Logan, um. I—” He stammered, before inwardly groaning at being cut off. That might’ve been a good thing.

The door swung open, coach walked in with this tall blonde following behind him. Finn inwardly made a mental note to befriend this dude. Sirius walked forward immediately, shaking his hand. The two exchanged words, but Finn wasn’t listening, too busy looking him over.

Coach’s hand was resting on his shoulder protectively as the kid got his first look at his teammates. His eyes brightened up when they landed on Finn and Logan. Finn noticed his hand go to his left wrist, tugging at his sleeve there a little, pulling it further down to cover his wrists. The outline of a bracelet was visible through the cuffed sleeves.

Finn tried to gather his words and think of a more private place to talk to Logan but had to shake the thoughts from his head when Dumo steered the blue-eyed kid towards them. When had Dumo taken the coach's spot in showing the new rookie around?

He throws on a smile, extending his hand before he can even reach them.

“Mon fils,” Dumo smiles, clapping the kid—who Finn has realized is really fucking tall— on the shoulder. “This is Leo,” he pronounces proudly.

Leo’s shy at first, he shares a timid little smile where his dimples make an appearance. Finn thinks that it’s the cutest thing he’s ever seen.

He catches the fond look that’s already gleaming in Logan’s eyes. Maybe, just maybe, things were knitting back together slowly.

Maybe Leo would help them in more ways than one.

—

Leo was around more in the weeks that passed. The weeks quickly turned into months, and the three were practically inseparable on and off the ice.

The rest of the team saw it too. Finn and Logan were obviously happier than they’ve been in a long time. Logan laughed more, his guarded eyes that they were used to seeing all the time were finally coming down. Finn smiled again, he hadn’t done that in such a long time. Sure, he smiled for the camera and the team, but something was always off about it, forced even.

Now it wasn’t. Now his smile was the way it was when he first joined. Free. He wasn’t worried about anything or anyone, it was just him, Logan, and the team.

But now it wasn’t just them. Now there was Leo. With his baby blue eyes that could light up anyone’s day just looking at him. The boy seemed so innocent from the moment they met him. He had looked around the locker room in awe like he couldn’t believe that he had actually made it here.

That one of the dreams he worked so hard to achieve was actually successful in the end.

Dumo had practically adopted Leo as he had with Cap. Like he would have with Logan had he lived with the Dumais’ and not Finn. Although Pascal has practically adopted everyone on the team as one of his own didn’t he?

There was still tension between Finn and Logan, especially when they lived alone in the same apartment. They had Leo over as much as they could, but he could only be there so long before going back to Dumo’s.

The peace couldn’t hold forever, something was bound to happen and one of them was bound to snap.

Leo just wished he wasn’t there to hear it.

On his way to their small apartment, he heard the yelling. It was loud, it was mean. It was hurtful.

Leo knew that Logan and Finn didn’t have the best relationship when he joined the team. That was easy to pick up immediately. He just never thought that he would be the reason for their misery.

When he heard the yelling he didn’t expect his voice to come out of their mouths, his name was spoken like it was acid on their tongues. He wasn’t even there, he didn’t do anything, so why was he the one who was being blamed.

The yelling didn’t silence when he turned the key in the lock. If anything Logan and Finn didn’t even spare him a glance, like he wasn’t even there. They probably didn’t even notice he was there to be honest.

It was like the fraying thread finally snapped.

Logan was red in the face, yellingand hurling insults that he’d regret a few hours from now. But at the moment he was too driven by rage and insecurity to protect, protect, protect. Anything hurtful thrown at him, he’d have to throw back something worse.

Finn’s face was blotchy, tears of frustration rolling down his cheeks. His hands waved around in front of him, trying to convey the words he was too choked up to say.

The room was full of nothing but harsh breathing for a moment, neither having anything to say to the other. Their eyes bored into each other across the room.

Leo let the door slam shut behind him.

Logan and Finn both startled, turning to stare at him standing in the entryway.

The fight seemed to drain out of both of them at once. Logan’s shoulders drooped and he turned to look away from both of them. Finn stubbornly rubbed the tears from his eyes with the palms of his hands.

“What the fuck?”

There was a beat of silence, no one said anything and Leo didn’t think he was going to receive a response. He was going to follow up on his question, asking what happened, why his name was getting thrown around and-

“I’m sorry…” Logan sounded small, like he was the one crying and not Finn.

Any questions Leo had were stored away for later.

“It was bound to happen.”

Suddenly Leo felt like he was intruding. They invited him over but he wasn't sure if he should be there, not when they were having a moment. Not when it looked like they may be finally healing.

“It’s not going to work out,” Finn continued. “This,” he gestures between the three of them, “isn’t going to work if me and you didnt work, Lo.”

Maybe not, Leo thought.

“I know.”

It was true, Leo knew. The two of them had had a rocky relationship since he joined the team.

But Leo thought he could make a difference, he thought he was enough to try and save their relationship.

He also loved them, he wanted this, he wanted to fight for them. He wanted them to stay.

But he also can’t be the only one who wants this to work, they all need to put in work for this relationship. He can’t be the only one pulling his weight.

Sometimes it’s better to save your breath. That’s what his father told him when he was younger and had just lost a friend dude to a silly argument. Some people are better to let go, they’ll hold you back and won’t make you happy. Always choose to be happy Leo, make the decision of fighting and giving up. Because giving up does not make you weak, some of the strongest people I know are the strongest because they gave up.

Leo really hoped he was right.

“I guess I should be going then.”

Finn and Logan nodded sadly, and Leo felt something in him break a little more. He turned and walked back out the door he came from.

Leo remembers crying on the way home. He hadn’t driven to their house, so the walk home felt like it took forever and no time at all.

#oknutzy #oknutzy angst #angst #peanut writes #sweater weather #leo knut #finn ohara #logan tremblay #lumosinlove #IM BACK WITH MORE ANGST FOR YA

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