#THIS IS A POST ABOUT VIOLENCE PLEASE YALL
Note
When will you post the y/n Meeks Martin x Ethan Landry post 😭
Right fucking now lmao.
This is my first post in a while, take it easy on me 💕
Secrets - Ethan Landry x Fem!Meeks-Martin!Reader
This contains SMUT - Minors DNI
Summary: Growing up with overprotective siblings has made it difficult for you to find someone to be with, until you meet your brother's nerdy best friend.
Contains: Fluff, Angst, Some violence-ish, Oral - f receiving, riding, p in v, teasing. (If I missed something, let me know:)
A/N: If any of yall are familiar with Spongebob, I have the fucking suds and I'll be writing a lot the next few days lmao
Your brother and sister were so protective of you. After some of the things they’d been through, you couldn’t really blame them, and you were thankful that they were always looking out for you. The only downside? They seemed to hate every person that asked you out or showed interest in you. You were sure that you would be single forever if it was up to them, because they didn’t think anyone was good enough for you.
Once they went away to New York for school, you missed them, but with there only being a one-year age difference, you knew you wouldn’t have to wait long before you’d be heading to Blackmore. You took the opportunity to finally put yourself out there and go on dates without the twins interfering, and you were starting to realize how right they were when they told you that the guys in Woodsboro weren’t really worth your time.
When you FaceTimed Chad to let him know that you got accepted into the same university as him and Mindy, he was beaming at the news. He was going on and on about all the things he loved about New York, and wouldn’t shut up about the pizza, but you tuned out everything he was saying once you noticed his roommate in the background. His hot roommate.
“Dude, my sister got in!” Chad yelled, as you rolled your eyes. He seemed more excited than you were about the whole situation. “Ethan, come say hi.”
“Fine,” he huffed, as Chad passed him his phone. He paused for a second once he saw you, but quickly pulled it together. It was awkward enough to meet someone for the first time on a phone screen, and he didn’t want to make it any weirder. “Hey, I’m Ethan.”
“Ah, the dorky roommate,” you said, as Ethan looked away from you to glare at Chad.
“Is that how you tell people about me? You say that I’m dorky?”
“If the shoe fits…” Chad trailed off before he tried to take his phone back from Ethan.
“Well, it was nice to meet you,” he said, passing the phone back to your brother.
“Have you told Mindy yet?” Chad questioned, a smirk on his face as he waited for your answer.
“No…”
“I knew I was your favorite!”
Once Chad and Mindy came home for summer break, they wouldn’t stop talking about how excited they were to take you back to New York with them. They were heading back early to help Chad move into his own apartment with Ethan, and Mindy was moving into the spare bedroom at Tara’s with Anika. They decided that you needed to come with them, even though you wouldn’t be able to move into your dorm for a couple weeks.
“I’m not thrilled about couch surfing,” you said, as Chad rolled his eyes.
“I’d sleep on the couch. You could sleep in my bed.”
“So, she’s staying with you for two weeks? I thought she’d stay at Tara’s,” Mindy said, “What happens when you want to stay over with Tara and she’s left alone with Ethan?”
“Oh, please. Ethan won’t try anything,” Chad said, as Mindy scoffed. “What?”
“What makes you think Ethan wouldn’t try something?”
“Because he’s my boy. He knows she’s off limits…I already told him,” Chad said, as you sighed in frustration.
“You know what? I’m not doing this whole ‘You can’t date so and so’ shit that I’ve dealt with for years,” you said, as Mindy cocked her eyebrow at you.
“You’re staying at Tara’s,” she said, “You’ve gotten a little feisty lately. It wouldn’t surprise me if you tried to get with Ethan just because we said you can’t.”
“No, I’m staying with Chad. It’ll be fine. Ethan doesn’t seem like the type to try anything,” you said, as she had a confused look on her face.
“When have you talked to Ethan?”
“Oh, that was when she called me first to let me know she got into Blackmore,” Chad smirked, as Mindy snapped her head in his direction.
“No, she called me first.”
They turned to look at you, “Who did you call first?” they both asked at the same time, as you shrugged.
“I’ll never tell.”
When you made it to New York, you were exhausted. You couldn’t sleep on the five-hour flight, and the jet lag was really starting to get to you as you went to the baggage claim area to get your stuff.
“When’s your furniture getting delivered?” Mindy asked, as Chad checked his phone.
“Soon. Ethan’s here somewhere,” Chad said, glancing around for his friend that was taking you back to your new home for the next two weeks.
“I think that’s him,” you said, pointing to the guy with the huge sign that said ‘Meeks-Martin’. “Is he always that lame?”
“Yeah, poor dude can’t get a girlfriend to save his life because he’s that cheesy,” Chad said, as he walked over and took the sign from him. “We’re just going to put this in the trash.”
“Hey, it took me two minutes to make that,” Ethan said, as he glanced over to you. He noticed you struggling with your luggage and carryon. “Can I help you with that?”
“I got it,” Mindy said, grabbing the large suitcase from you. She stared Ethan down for a second before she walked past him.
“How do you deal with them?” Ethan asked, as you sleepily smiled at him.
“They’re not that bad.”
As Ethan drove, Mindy was in the backseat arguing with Chad as he sat in the passenger seat about how you staying at Tara’s would be best. You sighed as they bickered, before you noticed that Ethan kept glancing back at you in the rear-view mirror. You thought he was even more attractive in person and thought about how hard the next couple weeks could potentially be with him living in the same apartment as you.
“Seriously, how are you going to feel when those losers leave the toilet seat up all the time?” Mindy questioned, as Chad scoffed.
“I think we’re housebroken,” Ethan spoke up for the first time in the drive as he glanced back at Mindy. He quickly looked away once he noticed her glaring at him.
“Listen, Landry. I know I won’t be able to convince her, so I want to make it perfectly clear that if you touch my sister, I will kill you.”
“What makes you guys think that I’m like that?” Ethan asked, the annoyance in his tone obvious.
“They think anyone’s like that when it comes to me,” you said, smiling at him as his eyes met yours in the mirror again.
You made it to Chad and Ethan’s apartment seconds after the furniture delivery truck pulled in. Once they opened the back of the truck, Mindy’s jaw dropped.
“I can’t believe mom paid for all this stuff,” she said, as Chad sighed.
“She didn’t. Ethan and I took out loans.”
“Maybe you should’ve asked mom. She paid for all my bedroom stuff,” Mindy shrugged, as Chad sighed.
“Why didn’t I think of that?”
After the stuff for the apartment was scattered in various areas of the house, Mindy got the text that Anika was at Tara’s, and was wondering when she’d be over.
“You staying here, or coming with me?” Mindy asked but cut you off before you could even respond. “You’re coming with me.”
“No, she can hang out here if she wants to. We’re all going out for pizza later tonight, anyway,” Chad said, as Mindy rolled her eyes.
“Are you two going to argue like this until I move into my dorm?” you questioned, as the twins exchanged their glances.
“Probably.”
“I’ll hang out here,” you said, as Mindy nodded.
“I’ll see you soon.”
Later that evening after you’d helped the two boys set up their new apartment, you were starting to get hungry. Chad wanted to keep working, and you eventually flopped onto the couch, sighing in defeat.
“I’m starving,” you whined, as Ethan walked into the living room and sat down on the free cushion beside where your feet were resting.
“Me too,” Ethan said, matching your whining as Chad glared at the two of you. “What? It’s been a long day. We skipped lunch.”
“We’ll leave soon,” Chad said, as you got an idea in your head.
“Orrr you could meet us there,” you suggested. “You know how I get if I don’t eat.”
“True,” Chad sighed, “Ethan, make sure nothing happens to her.”
“I won’t let her out of my sight.”
As you walked beside Ethan, he started to make small talk. By the time you made it to the restaurant, you were in a full-blown conversation about all the interests you both had, and he was proud of himself that he didn’t get nervous when he talked to you. You scanned the restaurant for your sister and Tara, but once you noticed they weren’t there yet, you and Ethan sat at one of the tables.
“Do you want to eat now, or wait?” he asked, looking at you from across the table.
“We can eat now, I’m so hungry.”
“I was hoping you’d say that.”
While you and Ethan ate the pizza that Chad hyped up so much, you were surprised at how good it was. You kept talking to Ethan, but you soon realized how much time had passed, and no one else had showed up to the restaurant.
“Where do you think they are?” you asked, as Ethan sighed.
“Okay, don’t hate me,” he said, as you curiously stared at him. “I kind of wanted to get to know you without your brother and sister making it seem like I was trying to get into your pants.”
“That’s really sweet,” you said, taking a sip of your drink. “But if they aren’t here, where are they?”
“They probably went to the one on campus.”
“Did you trick me into going to dinner with you?” you joked, as he started to blush.
“I’ll be honest, I thought they would’ve come to hunt you down by now.”
As soon as those words left his mouth, Chad, Mindy, Tara, and who you assumed to be Anika walked in. Chad sighed in relief once he saw you, but Mindy just looked pissed.
“You know how many pizzerias we stopped at to look for you?” she questioned before she looked at Ethan. “Why did you bring her to this one?”
“Simple mistake,” he shrugged, as Mindy stared him down.
“Simple mistake, my ass. I told you Ethan would try something with her.”
“It’s just pizza!” you snapped, “Last time I checked, we weren’t fucking.”
Everyone’s jaws dropped at your words as the waitress brought the check to the table. Ethan took it from her, his mouth still hanging open as he looked at you.
“You want to split it?” you asked, as he shook his head.
“I got it.”
“We’re going back to Tara’s,” Chad said, as you stood up from the table to hug her.
“Hey,” you said, before you turned to Anika. “It’s nice to meet you. Mindy wouldn’t shut up about you all summer.”
“Aww, babe,” she said, pulling Mindy into a side hug.
“Look, as much as I’d love to hang out with you guys, I’m exhausted,” you said, yawning as Chad sighed.
“I really wanted to hang out with Tara.”
“I’ll walk her home,” Ethan suggested, as Mindy, once again, glared at him. “I can drop her off and go to Tara’s after.”
“No, I don’t want her left alone in an area that she doesn’t know,” Chad said, as you rolled your eyes.
“I can stay there with her, then. Seriously, I won’t try anything,” Ethan said, putting his hands up in defeat as Chad nodded.
“I know you won’t, dude. Thanks.”
As you and Ethan made your way out of the restaurant, you heard Mindy scold Chad for being so trusting. But Chad felt like he had no reason to think Ethan would do anything to betray his trust.
Once you got back to the apartment, you were tired, but not tired enough to fall asleep. Ethan was about to head to his room before you stopped him.
“Do you want to watch a movie or something?”
“I thought you were exhausted?” he asked, as he turned around and made his way towards you.
“I just didn’t feel like going with them and being there all night,” you sighed, as he sat on the opposite end of the couch. “Why are you sitting over there?”
“Because if Chad comes home and sees me sitting beside you, I’m sure I’ll be moving out of here into an unmarked grave,” he said, half-joking as you rolled your eyes.
“Please. If it was Mindy, yeah. But Chad, I don’t think so.”
“Whatever you say,” he said, scooting closer to you as he turned on the tv. “You cool with something scary?”
“Mindy’s my sister, what do you think?”
“Scary it is.”
Ethan thought that after sitting through some of the goriest movies ever with the Twins, there was no way that you’d be freaking out over some jump scares. But once you were practically in his lap, your face hiding behind your hands as the scene played out on the screen, he started to laugh to himself.
“What?” you asked, looking up at him. That’s when you realized that you were practically on top of him and went to move, but his arm wrapped around you to hold you in place.
“Your brother and sister don’t get phased by this shit,” he said, smiling down at you. He started to glance between your eyes and your lips, and he was so close to making a move, when a loud shriek on the screen pulled your attention away from him.
“This is one of the few I haven’t seen,” you shrugged, “I wouldn’t be so jumpy if you picked something I had seen before.”
“I don’t think I believe you,” Ethan chuckled, as you turned your head to look at him again.
“If you want to kiss me, you should probably do it soon. The movie’s almost over,” you said, as he smiled and leaned down.
When his lips touched yours, you felt something different than what you’d usually feel when you’d kiss someone. You immediately felt the chemistry, and with the way his lips were quickly moving with yours, you were sure that he felt it, too.
Once he pulled away to catch his breath, he had a sweet smile on his lips. He definitely didn’t expect to kiss his best friend’s sister, but he was happy that you were bold enough to tell him it was okay. Another thing he didn’t expect was for you to adjust yourself so you were straddling him, as his eyes looked into yours. His hands moved to rest on your thighs as you leaned down to kiss him again. This time, it was way more intense. Your hands were in his hair as his hands rested on the curve of your ass to keep you as close as he could.
The second the kiss got deeper, you heard the sound of a key going into the front door.
“Shit,” you said, pulling away and jumping off the couch.
“Wait,” Ethan said, as he followed you. He pulled you in for one more quick kiss before you rushed into Chad’s room and shut the door.
When Ethan walked back out, Chad had just made it to the living room.
“Where were you?” Chad questioned, as Ethan glared at him.
“My room is beside yours. I wasn’t trying anything with your sleeping sister,” Ethan scoffed, as Chad nodded.
“Sorry, dude. I had to listen to Mindy talk about how much she hated the idea of the two of you being here alone.”
“It’s cool, just don’t accuse me of shit you know I wouldn’t do.”
Ethan felt a little guilty for lying to Chad, but you were the first girl that he’d actually felt something for in a long time. After days of stealing quick kisses and steamy make-out sessions whenever Chad was in the shower, the sexual frustration was starting to build. Ethan knew that he wasn’t going to initiate it, because the last thing he wanted was for you to think that was the reason he was spending time with you. Plus, you hadn’t been left alone long enough since the first night.
“So, I think Tara and I are going to a movie tonight. You guys want to come?” Chad asked, as Ethan looked over to you as you sat on the opposite end of the couch.
“I’m not really in the mood to watch a movie,” you said, as Chad cocked his eyebrow at you.
“You don’t want to watch a movie?” he questioned, as you shook your head. “What about you, Ethan?”
“Dude, spend time with your girlfriend. I’m sure she doesn’t want a third wheel tagging along.”
“Mindy and Anika are going, too. You wouldn’t be a third wheel,” Chad said, as Ethan chuckled.
“Your right, I’d be a fifth wheel. You guys have fun. I’ll probably just play video games all night anyway.”
“Okay, I should be back around eleven,” Chad said, as he made his way towards the apartment door.
As soon as he left, Ethan was on you, literally. You moved so you were laying back as he hovered over you, his mouth moving with yours as your legs wrapped around him.
“Hey, do you want to go to your room?” you asked once he pulled away to breathe.
“You sure?”
“Mhm.”
Within seconds, his feet met the floor, and his hands reached for yours to pull you up. He led you down the hallway to his room, before his lips connected with yours again. He backed you towards the bed, a small squeal slipping past your lips against his as your back hit the comforter. Your legs wrapped around him again, holding him as close to you as you could. One of his hands was running up your side over your shirt, until the material started to ride up. He gave you goosebumps as his fingers moved over the newly exposed flesh, before he pulled away to look at you.
“What do you want to do?” he asked, “Because if you just want to make out, that’s fine. There’s no pressure, and I don’t want you to think that I just want sex.”
”I know you don’t,” you said, smiling at him. “But if the sexual tension get’s any stronger between us and we don’t do something about it, I might actually explode.”
“So, you want sex,” he said, trying his best to not freak out.
“Yeah,” you said, as he leaned back down.
It didn’t take long for his hips to start moving, the hard cock in his sweatpants brushing against you. You gasped into the kiss every time your clit got the smallest amount of friction, before his hand moved in between your bodies so he could rub you over the shorts you were wearing.
“Fuck,” you mumbled against his lips. “You can take those off me, if you want.”
He quickly slid them down your hips before his hand went back in between your legs, rubbing across your soaked panties.
“You’re so wet,” he groaned, “Does kissing me do this to you?”
“Yes,” you said, as his lips moved to your neck.
Your bottom lip was in between your teeth as he slid your panties to the side, his finger rubbing slow circles over your clit.
“We’re here alone, baby. Don’t hold those pretty sounds in.”
Soft whimpers were slipping past your lips as his finger moved faster against your sensitive bundle of nerves. Your pussy was already drenched, and you felt yourself getting more wet by the second. You whined in protest once he pulled away, but he quickly shut you up, a low moan falling out of your mouth when he easily slid two of his fingers inside you as he moved down the bed.
Your hands tangled in his hair the second his tongue touched your clit, his fingers hitting that special spot inside you. Your hips were involuntarily arching off the bed at the feeling as he struggled to keep you pinned down.
“So good,” you moaned, as he sucked your clit into his mouth. “Fuck.”
Once he started to hum with your clit in his mouth, you felt the coil in your stomach getting tighter and tighter. Your moans kept getting higher and louder, and he made the mental note that he really couldn’t sneak around with you like this if Chad happened to be home, because you were just so loud. He loved it, though. All the noised you were making went straight to his throbbing cock as he brought you closer to the edge. Once your pussy started to squeeze his fingers, he sucked harder on your clit, the feeling throwing you into an intense orgasm. He groaned as your shaky hands tugged on his hair, his fingers slowing as he got you through it.
Once you started to relax, he sat up to look at you as he slowly slid his fingers out. Your cheeks were rosy, your chest was heaving, and you were still a little shaky. He loved that he had that effect on you and couldn’t wait to actually be inside of you.
“Let me help you with your shirt,” he said, as you sat up and looked at him, your eyes still hazy.
“That felt so good,” you finally said, as he chuckled.
“I hope so with how hard you were pulling my hair.”
“I’m sorry,” you said softly as he shook his head.
“Don’t be sorry, I loved it.”
Once he got you out of your shirt and bra, and he slid his sweatpants down his hips, he walked over to the bedside table to grab a condom.
“You still want to do this, right?” he asked, as you smiled at him.
“Yeah.”
He slid his boxers down his thighs before he rolled the condom on and lined up with your soaked pussy. He took his time as he inched his way inside of you, a loud moan falling past your lips once he was all the way in.
“So fucking tight,” he rushed out, before he started with slow thrusts. “That feel good?”
“Yes,” you moaned, your hands reaching up to squeeze your breasts as he started to go faster.
You knew you were wet, but you could hear how wet you actually were as his cock slid in and out of your pussy. His eyes stayed on you. He didn’t want to miss any of the faces you were making.
“Can I be on top?” you asked, as he smirked at you.
“Yeah, babe,” he said, as he pulled out and laid down.
You got up and moved to straddle him, the whimpers flooding out of your mouth as you sank down onto him.
Ethan felt like he was in heaven as his hands held onto your hips. He had the perfect view of your face, your tits, and he could even see his cock sliding in and out of you. Your hands moved to rest against his chest so you could stabilize yourself as you rolled your hips, the tip of his cock giving your g-spot the attention it needed.
“Come here,” he said, as you leaned down, your bare chest pressing against his. You felt his hands snake around you to hold you close before his hips started to move, his cock thrusting in and out of you so quick that you couldn’t think straight. He was letting out soft grunts that could barely be heard over your moans. You were both getting sweaty as you clung to him, his pace not letting up as you felt yourself start to get close.
“Fuck, Ethan,” you whined, as you felt that white-hot feeling spreading across your body, your hands gripping him as he just kept fucking up into you.
“I’m almost there, baby.”
You didn’t think it was possible, but he went even faster. You were a moaning mess as he kept slamming his cock into you, before his thrusts got erratic.
“Cumming,” he groaned, as you slowly moved back to meet his thrusts as he got himself through it. “Fuck, that was…fuck.”
“Yeah,” you mumbled against his chest.
He slid out of you but held you close for a few minutes, his hands rubbing over your back as you both caught your breath.
That’s when you heard other voices inside the apartment. You shot up, your eyes looking down to meet Ethan’s panicked ones.
“Where are they?” Mindy asked, the annoyance in her tone obvious as you and Ethan jumped up to grab your clothes off the floor.
Ethan quickly took the condom off and slid his boxers on as you tried to put your clothes back on. It was too late, though, once his bedroom door eased open.
“Hey, dude,” Chad said, before closing the door once he noticed Ethan was just in his boxers. “Shit, sorry.”
Chad was embarrassed as he turned to look at Mindy before he realized something. Your shorts were on Ethan’s bedroom floor.
“What the fuck is going on in here?” Chad’s voice boomed once he opened the door. This time he was able to see you, but you’d just slid your shorts back up over your hips. “What the fuck is wrong with you?”
He walked over to Ethan and grabbed him by the shirt he was able to put on in those few seconds, and you could see the fear in Ethan’s eyes as he looked over to you.
“Don’t fucking look at her!” Chad yelled, as Mindy finally walked into the room.
“Told you her staying here was a mistake,” she said, as Chad got angrier by the second.
“I didn’t think that my best friend couldn’t keep his dick in his pants.”
“Stop, seriously. You guys are making this more than it needs to be,” you said, as Chad looked over to you. “Calm down, Chad. He’s your best friend.”
“Last time I checked, friends don’t sleep with their friend’s sister!” he yelled, before he looked back at Ethan. “I can’t fucking believe you did this.”
“Why are you acting like I had no part in this?” you asked, as Mindy scoffed.
“Yeah, right. I’m sure Ethan charmed you out of your panties just to get what he wanted.”
“That’s not true!” Ethan snapped, his fear of Chad kicking his ass turning to anger as his friend finally let go of his shirt. “I really like her. This has nothing to do with me just wanting to sleep with her.”
“She’s my baby sister, Ethan!”
“Stop calling me that,” you sighed in frustration. “I’m a year younger than you. I’m a legal adult. Nothing Ethan and I did is wrong aside from you two saying that he needed to keep his distance from me.”
“He obviously doesn’t listen,” Mindy said, as you felt yourself start to get mad.
“You know what really fucking sucks? You two are my best friends, but you won’t let me live. You won’t let me experience things. You know Ethan’s not a bad person…you know how bad I’ve wanted to hang out with him and get to know him better, but you guys won’t let that happen.” you ranted, “I like him, too. And if I want to be with him, you aren’t going to tell me that I can’t! You better not threaten him anymore, either. I’m sick of this childish shit.”
Your sibling stared at you as Chad nodded in understanding. He had no problem intimidating any of the boys that’d shown interest in you, but out of the two of them, he was the one that seemed to be the one that got you.
“I do really like her. I don’t want us to have to sneak around, but I’ll keep doing it, if I have to,” Ethan said, smiling at you. “She’s amazing. It’d be stupid of me to not want a chance with her.”
“Do we have to sneak around? Or can you guys be cool about it?” you asked, as Chad sighed.
“I’m cool with it. Just…no hooking up when I’m here.”
“You’re okay with this?” Mindy scoffed, as Chad rolled his eyes.
“Ethan’s not a bad person. If he really likes her, what’s the big deal?”
“And that’s why he’s my favorite,” you said, brushing past them to head to the bathroom.
“Told you,” Chad said, teasingly pointing at Mindy before she smacked his hand away. “Ow!”
“Ethan, you better not hurt her,” Mindy scolded, as he nodded.
“I won’t…but can you guys get out while I put my pants back on?”
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This is just a stupid meme I made but thought I would share here too lmao
#twisted wonderland#twst wonderland#twst#twst meme#twst shitpost#kalim al asim#twst kalim#jamil viper#twst jamil#THIS IS A POST ABOUT VIOLENCE PLEASE YALL
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cant believe saying something like “patriarchy hurts men too” is as controversial as it is considering it’s literally like, basic feminist theory to acknowledge the way gendered prescriptions for social behavior and presentation is harmful to people of all genders. but alas, some people are so attached to their idea of men as the Ultimate Oppressors that their feminism cannot progress past “men bad women good” rhetoric. this is what people mean when they say you’re drinking the radfem koolaid btw
#my posts#anyone reading in bad faith and trying to clown in the notes will be blocked btw.#and if you genuinely dont understand how men are harmed by patriarchy please spare a moment to consider the way society treats men who#do not perform masculinity in a perfectly stereotypical cishet way.#please consider how masculinity in black men is disproportionately demonized and leads to black men being treated as inherently violent#thus making them ‘acceptable’ targets to have violence done against them#there is no ‘oppressor gender’ and ‘victim gender’. anyone is capable of being either or both.#and i suppose as a disclaimer i’ll say NO i do not think men have it ‘just as bad as women’ when comes to being hurt by misogyny#obviously women are the primary targets and thus get the worse end of shit. but thats not really my point#i have no interest in arguments about ‘who has it worse’ bc i think they fail to achieve anything practical and often just lead to erasing#the struggles of the group deemed to have it ‘not as bad’#we all know women are the primary targets of misogyny so it shouldn’t have to be spelled out#but some of yall think primary target = only target that matters = only women have a vested interest in dismantling patriarchy#which is just. not true
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exoplanet part 7
pairing: ellie williams x fem!reader (she/her pronouns used)
series masterlist (read parts 1-6 here!)
summary: you’ve won the life lottery as one of the few people on earth with parents who gained admittance to the most prestigous safezone in the world after the outbreak. but after a lab accident sends you out to jackson, wyoming, real life hits you fast. it’s a good thing that a hot lesbian finds u. (lol). mean ellie at first, slowburn, enemies to friends to lovers, fem reader asf
warnings: stuck up awful rich people. mentions of: abortion (sowwy ** i can't write kids), homophobia, throwing up, general awful elitism, heavy drinking, implied minor character death, and we talk about stuff like unethical labor practices/basically slave labor. depictions of: violence, guns.
a/n: hey yall....sorry for taking literal months to write this. and sorry in advance for what you're about to read, since this is admittedly a little far removed from tlou. and i'm also sorry if this isn't what you guys are expecting—i know i made you wait a long time for this, so it was tough for me to finally get around to posting because i didn't want to disappoint anyone. also it was just sooo sad writing the last scene because i just didn't want it to end!! anywayyyy enjoy
wc: 14.6k (i know...i know...)
tags: @intrnetdoll @dazedshoon @lovecaraya @pctcr @sariyaflowr @loser-keiji @prettyplant0 @666findgod @sawaagyapong @rystarkov @buzzybuzzsposts @addisonnie @galacticstxrdust @elliesbabygirl @pinkazelma @ariianelle @lu002 @blairfox04 @sparkleswonderland @elliesflower @muthafuckingstargirl @elliewilliamsissubermommyoml @eviestevie-14 @quicksilversg1rl @guacala @crtcrp @overtrred28 @sugarqueencosmos @iriswalrus @chiao1209 @lovecaraya @thatgiraffefromtlou @alwayslongingforyou @thelastofshimmer
May 16th, 2029
Welcome to AskAI! Enter your questions below and I'll try my best to answer :)
How does Cordyceps spread?
Ophiocordyceps unilateralis is mostly commonly spread between humans by the medium of bodily fluids, though this was not always the case. In the early stages of the outbreak, most carriers were infected by the presence of Ophiocordyceps unilateralis spores in flour from a Jakartan mill. It is still unclear how the contamination occurred.
Is saliva included in bodily fluids that carry Cordyceps?
Yes, Ophiocordyceps unilateralis can be spread through human saliva. Other bodily fluids include blood, feces, mucus, and semen.
So if someone were to kiss someone infected with Cordyceps, would that person be infected too?
Yes, because Ophiocordyceps unilateralis can be spread through human saliva.
How long would it take before seeing symptoms?
If Ophiocordyceps unilateralis spores were to be introduced to an individual via mouth-to-mouth transmission, the approximate incubation window has been recorded to be no longer than 8 hours.
How long would it take to be detected by a standard testing device?
Our testers would detect the presence of Ophiocordyceps unilateralis within an hour after exposure. Note that this only refers to the conditions outside of Terranova. There has never been a detected case of Ophiocordyceps unilateralis in Terranova’s history.
Thank you.
You’re welcome! Please leave feedback on the AskAI Feedback Form if you have any ideas as to how I can improve <3
One year later
“And there’s no way we can skip?”
“You know the rules.”
Dina rolled her eyes and sighed as you two stood at the door of your parents’ penthouse, waiting to knock. “Maybe if you went and I said that I was sick or something.”
“They’d know you were lying.”
“They’d probably be happy if I missed dinner.”
“I don’t know if happy is something they can be,” you said. You tried to make it light and joking, but it came out with the heaviness of truth. “Plus, they’re not exactly thrilled with me either.”
“Not exactly thrilled” was the understatement of the century. Ever since you’d come home with a pregnant outsider toting a gun and covered in dirt, your parents had convinced themselves that you’d somehow become corrupted over your time living outside.
But Dina had it way worse. Your parents were so scandalized by her rugged ways and the fact that she’d gotten pregnant out of wedlock that they’d nearly fainted upon realizing you were advocating for her Terranovan citizenship.
You both had had the good fortune of avoiding any further tense interactions with them for the last few months, but that morning you’d awoken to an email that contained an invitation to their home for dinner. It was noted that Dina had to attend.
So here you two were. Dressed in uncomfortable, stiff clothes and nervously twiddling your thumbs.
“You’re going to be fine,” you promised Dina. It sounded like a lie. “I’ll do most of the talking, okay?”
“If you say so.”
You rang the doorbell.
It took just a few moments before the door swung open.
“Hi Chris!” you greeted, plastering a smile on your face.
Your family housekeeper smiled back with a neutral warmth. She looked slightly thinner than you remembered when you saw her last just a few months ago. “Hello. Miss Dina, please remember to keep your shoes on this time.”
Dina flushed bright red. The last time she’d come over for dinner, she’d taken her shoes off and had been given a very stern lecture by your mother about how improper stockinged feet were for dinner. “Of course not, ma’am.”
You sent her an apologetic look and stepped inside.
“Your parents are in the sitting room,” Chris told you as she took your coats.
You thanked her.
“Why don’t they ever come up to greet us themselves?” Dina whispered to you.
You shrugged. “No clue. They just never have. They probably don’t want to have to take a break from whatever stimulating conversation they’re having about the country club happenings.”
She snorted. All of a sudden, you were overwhelmed by a sense of gratitude for Dina and her spirit. After your family had essentially decided you were hopeless, family get-togethers had become torture. Dina was your lifeline.
As Chris had said, your parents were found lounging in the sitting room, your mother fanning herself with one hand and holding what looked to be a gin and tonic in the other, your father sitting across from her in a tastefully worn armchair.
“Girls,” your mother greeted. Her eyes looked flinty and flat. “How good of you to come. I was worried you’d lost your way.”
It was a classic Y/L/N insult for latecomers, but it was barely a minute past 6:30.
“The elevator wasn’t working,” you offered. “We had to take the stairs.”
“Hm. Well, come and sit. Petra can get you a drink.”
A tall girl who couldn’t have been much younger than you was standing at the other end of the room next to the bar. She had bright ginger hair that stood out starkly against the neutral beige of her uniform and a small, squatty nose. You’d never seen her before in your life.
“Is she new?” you asked.
“Who, Petra? Oh, I think so. It must’ve been…oh, I’m not sure. This March, I believe? What do you think, darling?”
“Around then.” The solid ice globe slid against the glass with a clink as your father answered, taking a long pull of his bourbon after.
“It’s nice to meet you,” said Dina politely.
Your mother let out a labored sigh. “Dear, I’m very glad to see you working on manners, but there’s no need to engage with the help.”
Dina didn’t answer, instead sending you a meaningful look.
“Well, not usually,” she continued. “Though it is appropriate to interact with them in matters that are considered strictly business. Take, for example, the fact that neither of you have managed to order a drink yet. Petra, come.”
You stared at your hands, folded tightly in your lap. If there was anything you hated more than your parents, it was how they treated the help. And, though you’d never say it out loud, you didn’t understand how two middle aged adults needed more than one full-time housekeeper on hand. Chris made sense. Petra was entirely unnecessary.
“We really don’t need anything,” you said to Petra when she was in front of you, looking rather pale. “But thank you.”
The tension in the air refused to dissipate, not even when you were relocated to the dining room and had the crutch of picking away at the three courses served to you.
Dina, having been thoroughly scolded by your mother the last time she dined with her, was clinical in choosing which utensil to use for each course.
Your mother babbled on and on about the country club and the book club. Your father occasionally butted in with a few dull, lifeless comments. There was something especially dead in his appearance, like he was running on zero sleep.
“You may be curious as to why I asked you two here today,” your mother said after the main course plates had been cleared. “First of all, I wanted to extend my congratulations to my daughter for graduating in just a few days.”
“Thank you,” you said stiffly.
“And more importantly—”
You resisted the urge to roll your eyes.
“—I wanted to announce that your father will finally be retiring,” she said. “He’s been working so hard for the last few years. Isn’t this wonderful?”
“That’s really great, Father,” you said, feigning a smile to hide your confusion. You hadn’t known that your father had even worked, much less hard enough to warrant a formal retirement.
“Thanks, dove,” he said.
“When’s your last day?” you pried, wondering if you could manage any more information out of him.
“This Friday.”
“Hm.” So much for that. You exchanged glances with Dina as Petra reappeared with a tray of small goblets filled with colorful globes of sorbet.
“You’ll both be expected to be in attendance at his retirement party,” Mother added. She was frowning deeper now.
“Even me?” said Dina.
“Yes.” She smiled tightly. “And please note that they’re unaware that we helped you through your…little problem. I can’t imagine why that would ever come up in conversation, but I would really prefer it didn’t.”
“Uh huh,” responded Dina, her eyes wide.
When Dina had arrived, your family had given her two options—have her child and give it up for adoption, or terminate the pregnancy then and there in secret. Refusing to comply would lead to your parents being entirely unwilling to sponsor her citizenship as it was far too unseemly to be an unmarried mother. Though it was clear your parents thought she was devastated by the prospect, she’d confided in you later that she hadn’t realized that that had been an option for her. She’d taken the second option without a second thought, telling you that she didn’t feel ready to be a mother.
The unfortunate part of it all was that your parents held this over her head on occasion, using it as leverage to make Dina feel like she owed them. Hence why she never felt entirely comfortable with telling them off.
That your parents had kept the abortion a secret was hardly a surprise. Abortion was one of those issues that no one liked to talk about. Though it wasn’t the hardest procedure to get, it was never publicly discussed. You’d never personally known of anyone who had gotten one before, but the clinic had been so full when you’d attended with Dina nearly a year ago that you were beginning to second guess that fact.
“Anyway,” said your mother lightly, “Darling, have you heard anything from the Thompsons recently?”
“Oh, no. I haven’t seen Richard in quite some time.”
“It’s funny you say that. Melanie was supposed to host the Garden Club party last week, and you’ll never believe what happened.”
“What, honey?” Your father stared dully at the tablecloth, entirely unengaged.
“When I stopped by, the rest of the girls were already there,” your mother said. “Just sitting out in front of her building looking very confused. I walked right up and asked what was going on—you know, now that I’m co-president, I need to keep things in order—”
“Yes, honey.”
“—And Angie tells me that they’ve been ringing her for ten minutes and she hasn't answered. I decided to give her a call, and straight to voicemail. So we all sat out there until it started raining. We never even got an apology text.”
“Oh,” said your father, looking a little more engaged. “Is that really?”
“Yes,” your mother said. The attention made her sit up straighter. “It absolutely was. It was incredibly inappropriate. I couldn’t believe it. And to think that she stole that hosting spot from me…”
“Do you know if she’s alright?” your father asked,
She shrugged. “I should hope not. That’s the only excuse she could have for what happened.”
“Hm.” Your father moved the melting sorbet around without clinking his spoon to the crystal. “It seems that quite a few of us have been dropping off the face of the Earth.”
“It must be because of the long winter,” you said diplomatically. “Too much darkness makes us all a little loony.”
Your mother raised a brow and hummed in assent. “I suppose so.”
“Is that why groceries are so expensive now?” you asked. It had become a new development. About 6 months after you and Dina had returned, the prices on the shelves had rocketed upwards.
“Something like that,” your father said vaguely.
“What does that mean?”
“Y/N,” your mother warned.
“It’s alright, dear,” your father said, waving his hand. “It’s really nothing interesting. Supplying this city has always had its challenges. This year just happens to be especially hard.”
“What kind of challenges?” pried Dina.
“Shipments are always difficult to orchestrate,” he said. “As is quality control. It’s nothing that we haven’t seen before. Prices will go back to usual within a few months. The pendulum always has to swing back.”
It was a saying he always used—the pendulum analogy.
Dessert wrapped up quickly. Your mother gave you the official date for your father’s retirement party and ironed out your graduation details, and before you knew it you and Dina were off into the night.
“Thank fucking god that’s over,” said Dina as you two trotted down the street to the metro.
“Tell me about it.” You zipped up your jacket to ward off the slight chill in the evening air. “I’m really sorry you had to deal with all of that. I appreciate you coming with me. I know they’re awful to you.”
“Well, they’ll be worse if I don’t go,” she responded, her eyes cloudy for a second. She was right. One misstep and they could have her citizenship and their financial sponsorship rescinded.
“True,” you conceded.
The metro was bustling with people as you and Dina hopped on to the yellow line that would take you to the university residences. It was modeled right after the Parisian metros, with its Art Nouveau signs and themed stops. There was only standing room, so you two clutched onto the stainless steel poles in the middle.
The doors made a groaning sound and a speaker crackled as the announcer came on.
“Doors closing. Please stand clear of the exits. This is an express train with service to University Park. Other stops include 25th Street and North Village. There will be no evening service to Rotingham.”
You and Dina seemed to come to an unspoken agreement to remain silent and process the hell that had been dinner with your parents as the train lurched forward into motion. You closed your eyes and would’ve rested your head against the handrail had it not been so gross.
The only fortunate thing about your parents was the fact that they were incredibly easy to get to, despite living on the other side of the city from the university. What would’ve normally taken 40 minutes with transfers was cut down to 15 with the use of an express train that ran right from the station outside of your apartment.
You had resolved to just sit in silence when the train came to a screeching halt.
Your eyes shot open, meeting Dina’s confused gaze.
The lights above flickered, then sputtered out to leave you in darkness.
There was a hushed silence amongst everyone in your train car.
“What’s going on?” Dina whispered to you.
“This happens sometimes,” you said quietly back, but it was sort of a lie. It wasn’t entirely uncommon for the lights to go out, but you’d never had it happen in tandem with a train stopping on the tracks before reaching a station. And especially not an express train…
The lights flickered on again, and there was a shared sense of relief as a few of the train’s occupants let out a shaky laugh.
“Thought we were going to have to walk!” said a ruddy looking old man sitting across from you. The car responded with polite chuckles.
“Apologies for the delay,” came a voice over the loudspeaker—a human voice, not an automated one. “There was a disturbance on the tracks that had to be dealt with. We apologize for any inconvenience this may have caused. Service will continue as usual.”
The train lurched back into movement, the dark walls of the tunnel moving past in a blur.
“That was weird,” Dina remarked once you two had gotten to your stop and were walking up to ground level.
“Yeah,” you said, frowning. “I didn’t want to tell you then because I didn’t want to freak you out, but normally express trains never stop, especially not at this time of night with less trains in service.”
“What qualifies as a disturbance on the tracks?”
“I have no clue,” you confessed. The sun was hovering just barely over the horizon, its last rays of light reflecting aggressively off of the skyscrapers in the distance from which you came. “Someone probably dropped something big like a suitcase onto the tracks and blocked the way. It happens.”
You were purposefully avoiding the elephant in the room—that it had probably been a person on the tracks. It wasn’t especially common—not nearly as common as you heard it was in places like New York before the outbreak—but it happened on occasion. Terranova wasn’t the best place for everyone.
“The Thompsons are Simon’s family, right?” Dina asked you. She had to raise her voice to be heard over the cheerful chatter of fellow university students socializing and drinking on the green next to the sidewalk.
“Yeah,” you said. You and Dina had occasionally hung out with Simon since returning. You noticed that Simon had really taken a liking to Dina, but neglected to mention it since his parents were actively attempting to arrange a marriage between him and some girl in the Art History program at your school. “Have you talked to him at all? I haven’t heard from him for a week or so.”
“Me neither.” Dina tightened the dark braid that fell over her shoulder as she walked, looking rather troubled. “I didn’t realize his parents were missing.”
“They’re probably fine,” you said. “I seriously wouldn’t worry about it. There’s nothing here that could hurt them.”
“You’re right,” she said. “I just forget that there’s no infected here sometimes. Like, tonight, I thought I was gonna have to start swinging on someone in the train when the power cut.”
“God, same.” You shivered. “It’s weird to know that we don’t have to worry about that anymore. But I think it’ll get easier with time.”
“Yeah,” said Dina, but she didn’t sound convinced. “Well, I’m going to text Simon and see if he’s alright. Or maybe call him. I’m sure he’ll know what happened.”
“Let me know what he says.” You’d ascended the steps up to your shared apartment and were slotting the key into the keyhole. “By the way, did I ever formally invite you to my graduation?”
“Not that I recall.” Dina followed you in and kicked her shoes off.
“Well, consider this your formal invitation,” you said, turning to grin at her. “It’s this Saturday. Be there or be square.”
“Will there be free food?”
“And anything you want to drink,” you told her, though you weren’t entirely sure of that fact. You’d only ever been to one graduation in your life, and that had been years before it was socially acceptable for you to drink anything beyond the odd glass of watered down wine—but you recalled a memory of particularly free-flowing champagne flutes being passed around.
“Consider me sold.”
~
You had to be going crazy. There was no way.
You entered the numbers back into the graphing software again. Then again. Then one more time, just to be sure you were seeing what you were seeing.
“Everything going alright over there?” asked old Professor Gunther, looking up from his grading and his steaming cup of tea.
“Um—” You blinked, hard, then looked back down at your calculations. “Professor, can you look at these for me? I think I must’ve made a mistake.”
“Of course, my dear.” He graciously accepted the notepad full of barely legible numbers that you came up to hand to him and adjusted the glasses on his face so he could squint more efficiently. “And what is this exactly?”
“I’ve been parsing through the data on that star—that K star you’d been watching for a while—and, um, I’ve noticed something.” Your voice shook nearly as much as your hand as you pointed to the scribbled numbers. “Can you, uh, graph these? And put them into a different program than StarBlast? And look at the spectra? It’s giving me what I think is—actually, I don’t know. You do it and I’ll show you what I got.”
“I’m confused about what you could have possibly done wrong,” he said, though he was already opening his own laptop and starting up a different program that you hadn’t used before because of how much you hated the GUI. “Did you try to parse it by hand to check?”
“Yes,” you said. “Horrible idea. Took me forever.”
“And you got the same result?”
“Yeah.”
“Hm.” He took off his glasses to wipe them off, then began typing in the data you’d emailed to him earlier for bookkeeping purposes. “Let me see what I have.”
The agonizing few minutes it took for him to enter him already had your mind spiraling with possibilities as the implications sunk in. If you were right—if this was right—everything was going to change in your field.
The spectra graph roared to life.
“Jesus Christ,” you heard your professor say. “Is this—”
“I think so,” you said. “I think so.”
What you two were looking at held more than one piece of crucial information. The first was nothing but basic calculations of a Doppler Shift that detected that there was a planet. Your calculations estimated its size at roughly the same as the Earth, with a similar orbital period and distance from its star that placed it in the habitable zone.
That wasn’t anything earth-shattering. There were plenty of Earth-sized planets in the habitable zone, implying that if the conditions were right, there was an environment conducive to organic life.
What was, however, were the spectra emissions that you were staring at, slack-jawed and skin prickling.
“Methane,” you whispered. “And oxygen. And phosphine.”
And not just a little—enough that it suggested biological processes that could only occur with the presence of life.
“I think you should finish writing this report,” Professor Gunther finally said.
You froze. “What?”
He turned to you, his glasses sliding down his bulbous nose and a kind smile on his face. “I’ve made enough discoveries in my life. This one is yours to claim.”
You were overcome with so much gratitude that you launched yourself at him, throwing your arms around his neck and hugging him tightly.
Gunther good-naturedly patted your back with the enthusiasm of a grandfather being pestered by his grandchildren. “This is your moment. Take it.”
“Thank you,” you said, pulling back with tears welling up in your eyes. “Thank you, thank you, thank you.”
He smiled again. “It’s truly my pleasure. I feel lucky to have had a student like you.”
“If you don’t stop, I’m going to start crying.”
“We can’t have that,” he said, standing up and handing you back your sheet of calculations. “You have work to do.”
You settled back into your work across from him, nearly buzzing with excitement as you finished typing up your findings. It would be a long process for the study to actually be published—long, painful, and undoubtedly draining—but it would be so worth it. You’d be the one who discovered a planet that (most likely) harbored life. For the first time in history.
Though you wouldn’t be publishing a paper any time soon, you still had to log the planet into the “global” (not exactly global given that there was no other place on Earth with the same technology as Terranova) database. And with that meant giving it a name.
In that moment, it was like time froze as the cursor blinked in the box. There was nothing but the blood rushing in your head, the dull hum of the fluorescent lights above, and the slight stickiness of the leather desk chair beneath you.
You gulped. It was standard in the department to name planets after the astronomer that discovered them. You’d never had a planet named after you before. You’d only ever crunched numbers that Gunther had given to you to analyze spectra emissions. This was the first time you’d ever actually discovered something that hadn’t already been logged before it had landed on your desk.
And yet…
You closed your eyes. Suddenly you were back in the meadow at Jackson, tracing the wisps of the Milky Way with your finger as you and Ellie talked about the constellations. You saw the childish excitement on her normally stern features when she held the moon rock for the first time. You saw the wonder in her eyes when you told her a new space fact that she’d never heard before. That she’d never had the opportunity to learn before.
Your fingers moved before you could stop them, quickly tapping out the name “Ellie” into the box and hitting the enter button.
For the rest of the day, you regretted it. You tried not to think of her anymore. It was something that you’d promised yourself you wouldn’t do after you spent the entirety of last summer miserable and doing nothing but turning over the memories in your mind until Dina made you do something with her.
It was difficult. You wanted to put it in the past, because you couldn’t think about her without thinking about how she probably wasn’t even alive anymore. Which didn’t make any sense. Nothing ever made any sense about Ellie. Even before you predicted she’d been bitten, she’d already been behaving erratically—not packing her things, not saying a real goodbye to Joel, catching more food than their small group of three could possibly need near the end. It was like she knew that she wouldn’t be able to go.
Which didn’t make any sense, because why go all that way knowing that it was for nothing?
Which made you think about how bizarre she was before leaving. How sad she seemed when she told you that she was going, like even then she knew that it wouldn’t happen.
And you hadn’t gotten sick from her, even though you should have. She’d kissed you long after she would’ve been bitten. And you knew from your frantic research upon arriving that you should have tested positive when Simon checked.
So why hadn’t you? And why had she?
It was things like this that could keep you up for days if you weren’t careful. It was awful, but sometimes you liked to believe that she had really been sick and had died shortly after. You had a vision of her killing herself before fully turning, and even though it hurt to imagine it, it was the most humane end of them all. If she was dead, then maybe there was an afterlife, and maybe a piece of her was watching over you. Maybe she was still with you. Maybe she finally was able to rest.
You hoped that little piece of her had seen her name the first planet with life after her.
A tiny smile crept across your face, but inside you felt devastated. You were going to mourn her again all day, like you always did when something reminded you of her. And you were probably going to dream of her, of her stupid grin and the way her hair felt when it tickled your face.
Pull it together you thought glumly. You had to be normal for your father’s retirement party that night, and you had just under 4 hours to do so.
~
“Ugh,” you said, staring at your phone as you stood with Dina near the door, both of you dolled up and ready to go to the party.
“That’s how I feel too,” said Dina. “I’m going to kill myself if anyone brings up anything about how hard my childhood must’ve been and how I’m doing such a good job adjusting one more time.”
“Ha,” you said. “Mom just texted me to tell me that we need to stop by theirs first.”
“Why? Aren’t they already at the venue?”
“Yeah,” you responded, wrinkling your nose. “But apparently she forgot her gift for him—some vintage Rolex she got restored for him.”
“A vintage what?”
“Stupidly overpriced wristwatch,” you explained.
It took less time than usual to get to their building. Despite it being at peak busy hour, the platforms seemed eerily empty.
“Is there some holiday going on?” Dina asked, sitting across from you so that you both had your own row of seats.
“Oh, I’m such an idiot,” you said, clapping your forehead with your hand. “Of course there is. That’s why my father held his retirement party today. It’s the first day of this festival that goes all week.”
“What’s it for?”
“I honestly don’t know the background,” you admitted. “Most people just use it as an excuse to get incredibly drunk. I think it has something to do with the founding. It’s, like, the only time that public intoxication is okay.”
“Damn,” said Dina thoughtfully.
“The trains will probably fill up on our way back,” you said, sighing. “Hopefully it won’t be too bad. Worst comes to worst we can walk.”
“It gets that bad?”
“There’s hardly standing room,” you said, recalling the last festival you’d been around for—the summer before you’d been catapulted to Jackson. “And it just reeks of drunk people. And you have to be really careful, because I hear the custodial staff has to work overtime to clean up all the vomit.”
“Gross,” said Dina. “And here I was thinking that it was just all being proper and mannerly.”
“Everyone has their limits,” you said lightly.
The penthouse felt just as oppressive as when you came for dinners, like you were walking into the lair of a dragon who was coming back at any moment. Chris was gone—likely participating in the festival herself—but you were surprised to see the figure of Petra bent in a corner as you entered, dusting the top shelf of their bookcase.
You and Dina politely greeted her before ascending the steps to your father’s office.
“Why did your Mom put it in here?” Dina asked as you began shuffling through papers to find the box that your mother had described over text.
“My father doesn’t work in here all too often,” you said, opening a few drawers and seeing no trace of the green and gold box. “He just uses it to file away things.”
“What does he do?”
“I actually have no clue,” you confessed. “He doesn’t talk about it, and I don’t ask.”
“Do you want to see if we can find out?” Dina asked with a conspiratorial raise of her eyebrow as she motioned towards the filing cabinets. “Just a quick look. They’ll never know that we were here.”
You took a moment to consider. If Chris had answered the door to let you two in, you would’ve told her that you couldn’t, because she would definitely snitch if she knew. But she was nowhere to be seen, and Petra looked like she was busy enough downstairs.
“Sure. Why not.”
The first few cabinets held nothing interesting—just spending reports and copies of contracts that were written in legalese.
“It looks like he works with whoever supplies this place,” remarked Dina as you two skimmed the papers and saw records of contacts all over the continent, from the old continental US and South America, each detailing something boring about shipping dates and inventory.
But then came the third cabinet, with papers dated back before you were born with what looked like sketches of barren looking buildings and hand-scrawled notes.
“What are these?” you breathed, laying them out on the ground.
“I think…” Dina squinted. “I think that these might be manufacturing plants?”
“Oh?” You dug further around in the cabinet to see if you could find any further illuminating evidence.
“Yeah,” said Dina, staring as she began to flip through the pages already on the floor. “Holy shit, dude. This is…sort of messed up. Look at how small these living quarters are.”
You peered over her shoulder to see the architectural sketches of what looked to be more of what you imagined a prison to be. There were long bunks stacked on top of each other in what looked to be a never ending line, the mattresses barely even large enough to be considered twins.
Someone cleared their throat behind you, and you nearly leapt.
“I hope I’m not interrupting,” said Petra. Her voice was low and raspy. You noted that it was the first time she’d ever spoken.
“Oh, uh—” You began to frantically gather the papers, hoping she hadn’t seen. Would she tell your parents? “Sorry if we disturbed your work. My parents, uh, they asked us to get something from—”
“It’s fine,” she interrupted, holding up a hand. “I won’t say anything.”
“Thank you.” You stared up at her steely green eyes, wondering what had compelled her to approach you and Dina. “Um, is there anything we can do to help you?”
“Don’t drink the bourbon,” she said, so quickly that it seemed to fluster her.
“What? Why?”
“Just don’t do it,” she said again. “Better yet, don’t drink anything except for the water.”
“I’m sorry,” you said, feeling genuinely apologetic. “I’m not sure if I understand.”
Something crossed over Dina’s face, and suddenly something in her seemed to shift. Her features paled. She knew something you didn’t.
“I came from one of those places,” Petra said, motioning to the diagrams that you were staring at. “They’re not—they’re not somewhere you want to be. We all try our best to come here. That’s what they tell us, you know. Do well enough and you’ll get sent to where everyone gets to live a life of grandeur and luxury. But they barely send anyone, and when they do, they get shitty positions like this.”
Your breath caught in your throat as your understanding slowly grew. Of course. How had you been so stupid to think that wealthy people were ever going to have any of their kind work any real job?
“You two were the ones who came from outside, right?” Petra continued. When you two nodded, she crouched next to you. “And you were wondering what was going on with the prices?”
You nodded again, awestruck.
“Your Dad’s little spiel on it being about bad weather is bullshit,” she said, her words hard. “People are getting tired of this. They’re realizing they’re never getting out. You know what it’s like out there—it’s scary. It’s tiring. So many people get sick, so many die. So when people finally caught onto the fact that the work they’re doing is nothing but dressed up slavery and that their chances of getting out are basically zero, they start doing things to mess with the system.”
“Like contaminating the products?” Even as she said it, it seemed like Dina already knew the answer.
Petra just gave you two a long look.
“So that’s what he meant by quality control,” you said, the realization hitting you.
“Among other things.”
“How long do you think we have?” asked Dina.
“Not very long at all.”
“You guys can’t be serious,” you said, nervous laughter catching in your chest. “Do you seriously mean that Terranova isn’t going to be around for much longer? Is that what you’re saying?”
Petra shrugged and stood up. “Believe whatever you want. But from where I stand, it looks like there’s only two possible ways out of this situation. That is, unless you guys all become farmers.”
“I don’t think I’m following,” you said.
“Two options,” Petra said, sighing heavily. “Either we starve or we don’t. And the latter means taking a really big fucking chance on what we bring in.”
“But the system has worked for so long,” you said, more to yourself than anyone else.
“Too long,” she amended. “It was never sustainable. Maybe if you people had been okay with just eating native plants and wildlife. Maybe if you people were okay with changing your way of life. But no, you just had to have your fucking oranges from Florida and your coffee from South America.”
“Don’t lump me into this,” said Dina. “I just got here.”
Petra laughed, but it was a hard and sharp sound. “Well, chances are you won’t be here for long.”
“Hang on,” you said. “We’re still doing quality control inspections. The most likely scenario is that we’re going to have to cut down on imports—not that we’re about to go up in flames any minute.”
“I hope you’re right about that,” she said in that voice that told you that she thought that you definitely weren’t and didn’t see the point in arguing further. “Anyways, I’ve got to finish working so I can get home before dark. Be careful, okay?”
“You too,” you said. “And thanks for…not saying anything.”
It was a bit presumptuous considering that Petra hadn’t really given you any good reason beyond her word that she wouldn’t mention you lurking in your father’s cabinets, so you and Dina were thorough in carefully placing each file back into the correct place, just in case.
“Do you really think what she said is true?” you asked once you and Dina had located the watch and were on the metro once again.
Dina shrugged. “I mean, it makes sense.”
“Does it?”
“Look,” said Dina. “I know that this might be hard for you to hear, but I’m pretty sure this place lives off of what’s basically slave labor. If there’s any humanity left in the world, I would like to think that Terranova would eventually fall.”
You swallowed hard, then blinked. For a moment you thought you were going to throw up. “I never knew. I didn’t realize.”
“Of course you didn’t.” Dina’s voice was surprisingly patient. “You were a kid. But you’re not anymore, so it’s time to grow up and face the music.”
“I don’t know what to do.”
“I don’t either.”
The two of you fell into a silence as the train sped past empty platforms bathed in shadows and you thought and thought and thought.
There was just too much happening today. First Gunther’s lab, then Ellie, now your entire worldview toppling.
As the train windows continued to blur the background of the tunnels and empty stations, your mind spun with reflections of your childhood—of you enjoying simple luxuries that you didn’t realize came at the expense of others. That you didn’t even think to ask about. You’d mindlessly trudged along, eating your exotic fruits and drinking your expensive tea and wearing clothes built from indulgent fabrics just because you could. Even when Dina had asked where the oranges came from all the way back in Jackson, you hadn’t let yourself wonder. You hadn’t let yourself consider the possibility that it was anything less than the sanitized fairyland that you’d been brought up in—perhaps because you knew all along.
And that made it even worse.
Dina seemed to understand, sending you a few glances without prodding.
“Do you think we need to leave?” you asked, your voice just barely a whisper.
“Us leaving isn’t going to do anything,” Dina said, like she’d been expecting it. “And how would we even do that? It’s not like we can just charter a helicopter again to drop us off back in Jackson.”
Something twisted inside of you. “Oh, God. You’re right. We couldn’t even leave if we tried.”
And you might have to try, a sinister voice inside you whispered. What if Petra was right about the contaminated products? What if they missed something when checking imports?
You’d never been taught how quickly the fungus spread in the original outbreak, and you knew little about the normal amount of time it would take any sort of disease to infect the entire population. But you did know how densely populated everything was. How reliant everything was on a few strictly maintained channels, like public transportation.
It wouldn’t be hard for it to all come crashing down, really. It would just take the right place at the right time and—
“Don’t freak out, Y/N.” Dina laid a hand on your shoulder. “We’ll figure something out if it comes to that.”
You smiled at her, grateful that you didn’t even have to put your words into thoughts. “But if we can’t leave, what do we do? It’s not like we can just sit by and do nothing.”
Dina pulled her bottom lip under her teeth, worrying it before answering. “I don’t really think that we have a choice. Right now, at least. I don’t know if there’s anything that just the two of us can do.”
“I’ll find more,” you said. “I’ll talk to my professors—my friends at university—Simon—”
“Do you think that we’re the only two that know about this?” asked Dina. “Because I really don’t. Maybe your friends don’t. But anyone in the military and anyone who was around when this was founded has got to know. They just don’t care enough.”
Something slowly iced over inside of you as the implications sunk in.
Gunther had probably known. No, scratch that—he definitely did. He was an academic who had been in his 30s when the world fell apart. Any adult would have asked the same questions that Dina had upon arrival.
“We’ll figure something out, I’m sure,” said Dina firmly. “Okay? Don’t worry.”
“Speaking of Simon,” you said, narrowing your eyes, “Did you ever get in touch with him? Is his family okay?”
“Oh, yeah.” said Dina. “He texted me back a bit ago. Said something about how he was just busy and that his family had been camping up in the mountains.”
You two faded into silence.
The retirement party came and went without much trouble. On the outside, at least. You were a mental wreck, barely able to keep it together as near strangers came up to you and expressed how much bigger you were since they’d seen you a decade and a half ago.
You noted with muted suspicion that Simon’s parents were nowhere to be seen amongst the crowd, not even by the lavishly decorated bar.
~
That night, you did dream of Ellie. It wasn’t the usual. Ellie wasn’t turning in front of you or bleeding or crying out in pain with a bite mark on her arm. She wasn’t yelling at you for failing her and letting her get bitten without even noticing. No; instead, she lay beside you in your meadow spot and talked to you.
And somehow that was so much worse.
“I named a planet after you,” you said, feeling hot tears pool at the seams of your eyes that you squeezed together to avoid sobbing. You knew you were dreaming. You always knew you were dreaming—seeing Ellie always seemed to prompt a degree of lucidity that was otherwise missing in your sleep.
“That’s really fucking sappy of you.”
“I miss you.” It came out like a compulsion, like you couldn’t stop it. “Are you here? Are you with me?”
“Y/N,” Ellie said, turning to look at you. The darkness made it difficult to see her whole face, but you could see the look of pity on her features in the gray-blue of the moonlight. “Of course I’m not here. Don’t be stupid. I’m dead.”
“Sometimes I wonder if you’re not. Like, if something happened.”
“Something did happen. I died.”
“Fuck you.”
She smiled sadly, and for a moment you thought her eyes looked more reflective than usual. “It’s not very helpful to think that way. And what can I tell you? I’m not even real.”
“I’d like you to try,” you whispered.
“Fine.” She sat up, pulling her legs into a lazy tangle as she looked at you. “What did you seriously expect, dude? You were never going to stay. I wasn’t going to go. If I hadn’t been bitten, I’m sure I would’ve orchestrated some way to get out of it. My family is back in Jackson. I liked you just fine, but you’re not my family. That shit’s deeper. Different.”
You opened your mouth, then closed it, then opened it again. The sharp pain in your chest faded into a cold sense of familiarity. Then, because she wasn’t real and there was no reason to feel embarrassed about bearing your emotions:
“You feel more like family than anyone here.”
“Then that sounds like a you problem,” said Ellie, flatly. “I’m not gonna let you guilt trip me like this. Boo fucking hoo, you grew up richer than everyone else on Earth and had to deal with strict parents. Do you realize what actual, real problems are? What about the people who make your lifestyle possible, huh? What about them?”
“I didn’t know.”
“Then you’re fucking stupid.”
The tears were streaming freely down your face now. “I would do anything to be back with you. I wanted to stay. I miss you so much. I don’t know what to do with myself without you.”
“And I’m sorry you have to deal with that.”
“Will you just say that you miss me too? You don’t have to mean it. I just want—I just want to hear it.”
“I can’t miss you. I’m not around anymore.”
Ellie watched as you curled in on yourself and sobbed so hard you thought you were going to be sick.
“You’re so weak,” she said after a few minutes. There was no venom in her tone. It was as if she was merely relaying something as inconsequential as the weather to you. “All you do is expect other people to care for you.”
Not real. Not real. Not real you repeated to yourself in your mind with growing franticness.
She wasn’t real. None of this was real. Ellie was never that affectionate with you, but this was another level. This was something personal.
“You said that being weak isn’t bad.”
“And you said that you were going to make sure I was going to get to Terranova.”
“And it’s not my fault that you decided to go gallivanting alone in the woods.”
“You could’ve tried harder.”
“I did as much as I could.”
“Sure you did.”
You bolted awake. The hair at the nape of your neck was wet with the slick of sweat. For a moment, you let yourself catch your breath, reorient yourself in your surroundings.
Your room. You were in your dorm room, with your space posters and your books. Ellie hadn’t been here. She hadn’t said that. You were okay.
A blaring noise jarred you as you realized that your alarm had made you wake up. Your alarm, because it was graduation day and you needed to be ready for a full day of festivities.
“Fuck,” you muttered, scrubbing your face with you hands. The last thing you wanted to do after this was have to see your parents and pretend like you like them for appearances.
She's gone. She's gone. She's gone you repeated in your head like a mantra. It was over. You shouldn’t have named that stupid planet after her, because she was gone and she always would be.
It would only be a matter of time until your parents would start asking you about your dating life, you realized as you brushed your teeth over the shiny white basin of your sink, the minty bubbles making your lips tingle. They’d been willing to entertain your reasoning of wanting to focus on your studies while you were at university, but you knew they’d been looking for prospective engagements behind your back.
It took you longer than usual to get ready, your mind wandering as you lingered in different corners of your apartment. You kept the lights off, opting to let the cool, gray daylight from the gloomy clouds wash the surfaces of your room.
“Hey,” said Dina, appearing from her own room and leaning against the doorframe.
“Good morning,” you greeted blandly, your attention on the necklace that just wouldn’t clasp around your neck.
“Looking spiffy,” she said. “By the way, did Simon say anything to you?”
“No.” You paused and turned to her, a frown on her face. As far as you were concerned, you really had no reason to be in contact with Simon beyond the general pleasantries.
“He just called me,” said Dina. “He seemed—I dunno. Like, weirdly frantic. He was saying that we need to stop by his.”
“His” was inconveniently on the opposite side of the city, even further past your parents’ place.
“Why? Pretty far for a short jaunt.”
“He was really insistent,” pressed Dina. Her long black curls were unruly, her skin sallow in a way you hadn’t seen in a while. She hadn’t been sleeping as well recently, it seemed, just like you since you’d spoken to Petra. “Maybe we should just stop by.”
“Did he say anything about why?”
“I tried to ask,” said Dina, frowning. “But the call dropped.”
“I hate how horrible service is in your room,” you said.
“Me too. Anyway, are we gonna see him?”
You shrugged. “I guess. We have some time. I’ll text him too just to see what’s going on.”
Dina was ready in just a few minutes, pulling a light blue sweatshirt over her shirt and stepping into her shoes.
“You look soooo cute,” she said, pinching your cheeks. “My little grad.”
You rolled your eyes, but the size of your smile ruined it.
For once in your life, you noticed that the university green outside of your apartment was suspiciously empty.
“Quiet,” Dina noted as you made your way to the metro. “It’s eerie.”
“People were probably partying all night,” you said. “Celebrating graduation and whatnot. I imagine everyone’s sleeping off a hangover instead of having to get up at the crack of dawn to voyage across the city.”
Dina held up her hands. “Gee. Sorry.”
The train was a little more populated. Some older Terranovans had newspapers cracked as they licked their fingers to turn the page. The silent hum of the train lulled you into another soliloquy as the tunnel plunged you into darkness.
You had to stop thinking about Ellie. You needed to move on, as awful as it was. You’d named a planet after her. She’d be forever remembered in the stars, and that should be enough. You didn’t need to keep dragging her memory behind you like a corpse, because she was dead and she was never coming back and she was—
On the platform?
Your mouth dropped as the doors of the train slowly rolled open to reveal a short girl with shoulder length auburn hair slowly ambling towards the platform. She was wearing a pale green short sleeve that had some sort of edgy spatter pattern on it—something that was very Ellie-esque. But something wasn’t…
It took you one breath to notice that neither of her bare arms had any tattoos. It took you another to see that what you had initially assumed to be a pattern was actually blood-soaked fabric formed from red rivelets that trickled from a wound on her neck.
“Holy fuck,” you whispered, grabbing Dina’s hand. “Do you see—”
“Everybody run!” Dina screamed, leaping up from the train seat and dragging you with her as she bolted off the train and to the opposite exit.
The girl wailed and barrelled towards the train car, her eyes locking onto the nervous movement of the passengers. You froze. It was slowly becoming obvious that this wasn’t Ellie, from the slightly different set of her eyes to the unfamiliar button nose. But it was hard to not feel anything but sympathy for the monster before you. She was just a girl, probably younger than you.
“Fucking go, Y/N,” Dina snapped, yanking you harder and onto the platform just as Not-Ellie leapt onto one of the newspaper readers. “It’s not her.”
She didn’t need to tell you twice. In seconds you two had sprinted to the mouth of the stairs, feet pummeling against the pavement as the sounds of the carnage unfolding behind you followed.
You ran. You didn’t stop running, not even when the screams faded and you and Dina were blocks and blocks away, hidden in an alley. Not even when your lungs were so empty and sore that they felt like they were breaths away from breaking, not even when you were sure there was nothing left inside you.
Dina kept your pace, blindly following your lead as you darted in between streets and side alleys until you reached your parents’ apartment.
“Do you think there’s more?” you managed to whisper through heaving voices once you stood on the steps.
You and Dina hadn’t ran into anyone after the metro, undead or alive.
“Not here,” hissed Dina. “Inside first. Then we evaluate after we’re safer.”
For a moment, the phantom dread from your normal life spilled over and you were afraid of facing your parents. It was almost laughable—there were deranged infected hosts looking to eat your flesh roaming the streets, and you were worried about seeing your parents.
“I’d almost prefer out here, too,” said Dina, looking as if she’d read your mind.
The apartment complex was also empty and eerily quiet as you two ascended the steps. Dina had insisted that you took the stairs, pointing out that the elevator was far too risky.
“It might get stuck,” she’d whispered as she’d pulled you away from pressing the button. “Also—unnecessary noise.”
You nodded wordlessly, following her up the steps until you reached the top floor.
Still no one to be seen.
The spare key was still hidden under the flower pot, and the penthouse door swung open easily. You and Dina locked it behind you before dragging a small bookcase in front of it, piling on books until no one could physically break through.
“Sweep the apartment,” Dina said lowly, reaching over to grab the fireplace poker that was in the entryway. “Behind me until you get a weapon.”
For a few tense moments, you cowered behind Dina as she navigated you both into the dark, empty kitchen. Every breath that left your lips was shaky and uneven. Your fingers trembled around the handle of the butcher’s knife that you’d retrieved from the block.
Nothing was on the first floor.
Nothing on the second floor, either. There was no sign of your parents anywhere. By all accounts, it seemed that they’d just up and left for coffee. Which is probably what they’d done, given that your father had just retired and had nothing better to do.
“Fucking thank god,” you’d cried out once you’d swept the last room, collapsing onto the sitting room sofa. “Jesus Christ, Dina. What the fuck. I can’t believe I just—”
The words petered out as the adrenaline rush that had been keeping you at least someone composed dissipated, leaving you a shaking and inconsolable mess.
“We’re so lucky that we got out in time,” said Dina, her eyes blurry and unfocused.
You took a break from your crying to look at her. “What?”
“The doors close automatically,” she said flatly. “No motion sensor. If that girl had shown up any later—if we hadn’t noticed her in time—”
“We would’ve been stuck on the train with her,” you said, cold realization trickling into you. “Oh my god. That probably happened to the people on the train who weren’t quick enough.”
“Or didn’t know any better,” Dina added. “Didn’t you say that no one here really understands what the infection is? That it makes people hosts?”
Your heart dropped. “We’re so fucked. We need to get out.”
“Have a plane anywhere?”
“Oh, god, Simon,” you wailed. “He was probably—he must’ve known—his parents must have—”
“Let’s not dwell,” said Dina firmly, brushing her hands off on her pants. “Okay. Let’s take inventory of the situation. That girl likely wasn’t patient zero. Wherever she came from was around…8th street?”
You nodded.
“Right. 8th street, which is where the majority of non-student residential living spaces are. Chances are that if it wasn’t already, it’s all over that area. We came south, which is away from the most densely populated area and probably why we haven’t seen anyone else. We’re up high with what seems to be currently running water, no current activity in the building, and plenty of both perishable and nonperishable food.
“But this isn’t permanent. The power grid is going to fail soon, and plumbing is likely going to go next. And if we somehow make it long enough, any infected in the building are going to turn into clickers, and they’ll stop at nothing to get in. Our window is limited. If we wait to get out, they’re going to get stronger and grow in numbers. We need to play this right.”
“So what you’re saying is that if there’s any possible chance of escape,” you said, feeling the blood drain from your face, “That we need to take it.”
Dina nodded, her face hard.
“How long do you think we have until we have to make that choice?”
She winced. “Probably 2 hours ago. There’s likely enough infected scattered around the city after the metro incident that it’s all over now.”
Your stomach dropped.
“But that doesn’t mean we shouldn’t try,” said Dina. “It’s only going to get worse the longer we wait. So if that big fancy scientist brain of yours has any genius plans of how to get us out, please hurry it up and say so.”
“Well,” you said, your mouth dry as you brainstormed aloud, “We are at the southern tip of the city. We’re probably not all that far from the border. The problem would be getting across—and, of course, getting there in the first place. It’s designed to be deceptive so that raiders can’t find it.”
“We’re not going to cross the border,” said Dina. “We’re never getting across on foot unless it’s been destroyed. Simon told me about how it works. There’s quite literally zero chance unless we start tunneling underground.”
“So no crossing on foot,” you said weakly. “Noted. Well. Uh. Can you fly a plane?”
“Depends. Do you have one?”
You buried your face in your hands.
“Come on, Y/N. Think. There has to be another option.”
Another option. Another option. Think, think, think…
Scientist brain. Science.
Like your degree. Like the lab you’d been working in last year. Like the ill-fated experiment that you’d scrapped after the university cut funding for it after your accident.
Like the time that you’d actually succeeded in inventing teleportation, even if it was accidental.
Like the contraption that was likely gathering dust in an unlocked lab room just a few blocks away.
“Dina,” you said, “I’ve got it. But I need you to get me to Gunther’s lab.”
The only good thing about today was the fact that Gunther’s lab, which was normally an inconvenient train ride away from your apartment, was in fact within perfectly reasonable walking distance from your parents’.
There were many bad things, though. Namely the infected now roaming the streets. And the plumes of smoke rising in the distance, suggesting that the Terranovan authorities were attempting to quell the issue the old-fashioned way.
With two knives and a pistol in your hand (you’d never been more happy to see something actually useful in your father’s antique collection), you were at least feeling more prepared to slowly creep back down the staircase of the building and out onto the streets.
For the first two blocks, everything remained uneventful. You and Dina stuck close to the shadows, being careful not to speak, make any noise, or bump into anything noisy.
Then a girl that looked somewhat familiar to you came stumbling around the corner, cloudy orange saliva dripping from her ashen lips. She locked onto you and began to excitedly chitter, her jerky movements becoming more pointed as she started approaching.
“Knife,” Dina whispered, flicking your arm once she saw you raise your pistol. “Too loud.”
It was your first kill without the help of a bullet. As the blade slid across the throat of the girl, you realized where you recognized her from—she’d been one of the students you’d tutored back in high school. You’d always liked her. Her name had been Liesel, and she was one of your best pupils. She’d been so bright. You thought she’d end up skipping senior year and just coming with you to college.
Not anymore. You tried not to think too hard about the look you’d seen in her eyes right as you severed her carotid artery—something human, something cognisant. You couldn’t cope with what that implied.
Did Ellie look like that? No, surely not. It’d been over a year. She was likely a clicker by now, her freckled face entirely swallowed by the spore shards. But was she still in there, like Liesel had been?
The next ones were easier—random men whose eyes remained flat and flinty even as you sent them to their ends. By the time you and Dina had broken into Gunther’s lab, you were splattered in blood and assorted mystery fluids.
The sterile building was empty and deathly silent. Each step on the tiled floor echoed, the fluorescent lighting painfully bright.
“Are there any workers in here usually?” Dina asked, her voice low.
“Rarely,” you whispered back. “It’s normally totally empty beside me or Gunther.”
“I hope you’re right.”
A long screeching that sounded like it came from a few doors down made you freeze.
“Let’s move,” Dina said under her breath. “I don’t want to find out who that is.”
Gunther’s lab was nearly just as you remembered it. The only difference was the missing files on his desk, which suggested that he’d taken his work home with him.
As you’d hoped, the prototype you’d developed in your third year was under a white sheet, almost entirely untouched.
“This is what sent you to Jackson?” Dina whispered in wonder, her fingers hovering over the wires but not daring to touch.
In actuality, it was a very small contraption, just transistors and gates and wires that crossed over each other like veins. It had been intended for use on laboratory rats. It’d never been sized to people. But if this was your only shot…
“I can’t remember exactly what Gunther and I did to—”
Scratchhhhhh.
Your blood ran cold. Something was outside the door.
“I’ll cover it,” said Dina, her voice firm. Don’t worry.”
And you wouldn’t—not when there was one zombie against you and Dina, armed to the teeth.
“Uh, anyway—” You blinked as you stared down at the mess of wires. “Technically what happened was it short-circuit—”
Scratch scratch scratch
You gulped. “Um, like I was saying, it short—”
Scratchscratchscratchscratch
To punctuate the point, the door creaked and shifted.
Dina pressed her finger to her lips as she slowly crept over to the door, standing on her toes to look through the thin strip of plexiglass that ran across the top of the door.
For a moment, you thought that she’d frozen. Then she quietly stepped over to the desk, snatched the pen Gunther had lying around, and scribbled something onto it. She handed it to you, her finger still posed over her lips.
7 of them. All big. I think they followed us from the street.
Just as you finished reading it, the doorknob began to turn, back and forth and back and forth against the lock.
Dina pulled the note from your fingers to scribble something else out.
Don't say anything. Noise will send them into a feeding frenzy. Door won't hold long. Do whatever you need to fix it and get us out.
You nodded, your heart crawling in your throat. If you couldn’t figure out how to fix this in time…Gunther’s lab was on the 6th floor.
There were only 3 bullets in the pistol—you’d checked. And a kitchen knife was fine when you were out on the street facing one infected at a time, but 7 in an enclosed space was different.
You probably weren’t going to get out of here alive.
Not unless you pulled it together right now.
You pinched the bridge of your nose as you tried to run through all possible ways to recreate the conditions that had sent you to Jackson. You needed that special iridescent wire, which you could see shoved into the corner. You needed a power source. You needed a working circuit board.
You had all of it. You could do this.
SIlently, you retrieved the spool of wire and began reattaching it to the board in the pattern you vaguely recalled from your work.
The lights flickered above, and it was all you could do to keep yourself from swearing out loud.
The power needed to hold. It needed to hold for just one more minute, just for a moment while you finished configuring the—
Your hand knocked the spool to the floor.
Bang. Bang. Bang.
The thudding started slower but crescendoed into the sound of groaning wood as the infected outside began to pound at the door.
Dina waved a slip of paper in front of you with wide eyes that said Hurry the FUCK up!.
You sent her a desperate look back. Your hands were shaking so hard that it was a miracle you were even able to feed the end of the wire through the pliers to snap off the end. You dug your nails into the protective sleeve at the end to expose the tip of the wire.
The door held just until you plugged the wire into the input.
As it hummed to life, sputtering and sparking and shimmering in the air, the lights flickered once, then plunged you into darkness as the sound of wood splintering came from the door.
Someone—it was probably you—screamed as a crowd came barrelling through the door, all hunched shoulders and gaping maws.
Then you grabbed the hand of Dina and felt yourself tumble into nothingness.
~
The sky was clear and bluebell blue above you when you came to, your back pressed uncomfortably against the sun-warmed earth. Every part of you ached like you’d just been run over, just like it had that day one year ago that started it all.
You didn’t need to look around to confirm—you were certain of where you were. You just knew it.
A groaning sound made you shoot up, clutching at the pistol in your hand.
Dina was sprawled on the ground next to you, rubbing her forehead with her hands.
“We did it,” you said, astonished. “We actually did it. We got out.”
“And you launched us out to Jackson.” Dina was sitting up now, looking around with wide eyes. “Jesus Christ. Are those things coming with us?”
“I don’t think so,” you said blandly. Your hands were still shaking, just as they had in the lab moments before.
The backpack you’d packed with supplies lay strewn on the ground, covered in the dust of the clearing.
“Are we—”
“I think so,” you said. “Funny how it sent us to the same place it sent me. I guess we’ll never figure out how, though.”
“Yeah.”
A comfortable silence fell over the two of you as you acclimated to the bright Wyoming sun, the warmth of the air against your skin.
Your heart lurched as the implications sunk in. Now that you couldn’t pretend like Jackson had been some sort of distant memory, you were going to mourn Ellie all over again whether you liked it or not.
“It’s going to be weird without her.” Dina was apparently on the same page.
You choked back the sob that came up, rubbing your eyes angrily. You would not cry right now, not when you had more important things to attend to.
“She really did love you, you know,” Dina continued, also apparently oblivious to the fact that you were just barely holding it together. “Even if she never said it. I’ve never seen her like that around anyone. I hope you haven’t been beating yourself up over what happened.”
You sent her a tight smile. It was odd, talking about Ellie like this with her. You’d never had before. It was one of those topics that you both knew to just avoid. “I just hope Joel is alright. I can’t imagine how difficult that would be—losing two daughters just like tha—”
A twig snapping in the woods sent you into silence, your hand drifting back down to your pistol as you spun around.
For a moment, all you could hear was the breath that hitched in both your and Dina’s throat. Then a girl with short brown hair burst through the tree line, her gun set on you.
“Ellie?” you gasped.
She fell still, mouth agape and eyebrows nearly touching her hairline.
“Ellie, what the fuck?” said Dina, recovering much quicker than you. “What are you doing here?”
“What am I—” Ellie dropped her pistol so it pointed to the ground, staring at Dina incredulously. “What are you doing here?” Then she rounded on you. “What did you do? You promised to stay in Terranova.”
You couldn’t answer. You were just so starstruck that all you could was stare, taking in everything about her. She was certainly Ellie—with her stupid little flashlight on her backpack strap and her fern tattoo and the perpetual grumpiness etched on her face. It was strange to think that you could have mistaken anyone else for her.
“Well?” she pressed, stepping closer, her mouth in a hard line.
“Terranova fell. It’s gone. I did what I had to do to get us out.” The words came out quietly. Then, without thinking: “You’re alive.”
“Long story,” said Ellie. “I think the scanner was defective.”
“That sounds like a pretty short story.”
She stared at you with an expression of such odd devastation that you felt your heart drop.
Dina jumped to her feet and launched herself at Ellie, throwing her arms around her neck and laughing hysterically. “I can’t believe it. I just—I just—you’re alive. I’m so glad you’re alive.”
Ellie, for her part, stood mostly still, awkwardly patting Dina on the back until she was released. “I’m glad you are, too.”
You tried not to feel jealous, but it was hard not to. Dina could jump into Ellie’s arms and tell her nice things like that without having to think twice because they’d always been friends. You did, because you weren’t sure if Ellie would want that anymore.
You didn’t try to touch her as she walked you and Dina back. She followed suit, not even trying to speak to you.
By the time you were walking through the walls of Jackson and waving to the gaping passerbys who were shocked at your return, you felt like you were going to be sick.
Ellie was alive. She’d never been dead, and you’d left her out here while you and Dina got to eat fancy Brazilian chocolates and Floridian oranges and artisanal bread. You’d been actively trying to forget her instead of trying to find her.
And now she was here, next to you. And she didn’t seem even remotely interested in you. But could you blame her? It had been a year. You’d left her to come back to Jackson all by herself. She didn’t have any reason to wait around for you. She’d probably found someone else. Or gotten back together with Cat.
And who were you to think that she’d even be interested in you if there wasn’t the guaranteed casualness from a definite end date?
“Well, I’ll be damned.” Joel appeared on the front porch as you and Dina approached with Ellie flanking you, his eyes wide.
“Joel!” you cried out, your angst briefly forgotten.
His eyes darted between the three of you, his face awash with shock. “Did ya just get sick of living there or something?”
You looked down and surveyed your outfit. You were clearly wearing something that was intended to be formal—a flowing graduation dress—but you were splattered with blood and viscous mystery substances and covered in a healthy layer of dirt. You’d clearly gone through some shit.
You were struggling to come up with a response other than “hey” when you were reminded of something you’d shoved into your bag while you’d been preparing to leave your parents’ penthouse.
Feeling smug that you’d managed to remember, you reached into your pack and fished around until you found what you were looking for.
“We just figured you’d be almost out of this by now,” you said dryly. The value-sized bag of coffee beans dangled from your fingers, its maroon packaging catching in the sun.
His face split into a wide grin as he shook his head in disbelief. “Well, butter my butt and call me a biscuit. I guess I’ve got to tell Tommy that we don’t have to ration anymore. C’mon, let’s get you settled.”
~
Joel insisted that you move back into your old room instead of the vacant cottage down the street, which was equal parts touching and equal parts terrifying. Ellie lingered by the doorway as you unpacked, disappearing down the hall when you finally lifted your head from your few belongings to say something to her.
You let out a long, labored exhale, dropping onto your bed and curling your knees up to your chest. You’d since changed and showered the dirt and blood off, shed your tattered graduation dress and left it gathered in the corner like a snake’s molt. The setting sun filtered through the curtains, turning the walls golden.
You didn’t know what to do. That you could even come back to Jackson had been a thought you hadn’t dared to consider until this morning, when there were no other options. That Ellie was still alive—well, you hadn’t had any time to strategize or plan for that one. You were still reeling from seeing her for the first time in a year, all summer freckles and flyaway hairs escaping from a loose hairband.
She’d looked even better than you’d remembered. There were certain parts of her that you realized you’d forgotten—like the scar on her eyebrow, the way her voice sounded. It made you feel nauseous, knowing that despite your best efforts, you hadn’t been able to keep the real Ellie alive in your head.
You’d already eaten something with Tommy and Maria, who had been insistent on hearing from you and Dina about the events in Terranova. Joel had left you to your own devices with instructions to see him tomorrow to figure out work after you’d had a decent rest, so there was really no reason to go roaming around hoping to run into Ellie.
But you really wanted to. You checked the clock again, seeing that it was already past 9. Dusk had already fallen upon Jackson, the setting sun now just a suggestion of a golden line on the horizon.
You had a feeling you knew where she was.
The meadow was just as lush and green as you remembered as your feet carried you across the grass. It seemed that really nothing had changed—except for the horses in the distance, where you could see a small foal beside a chestnut mare that you were pretty sure was Shimmer.
“Hi,” you said, settling down next to Ellie’s spot under the tree.
If she was surprised to see you, she didn’t show it. She just sighed and fiddled with the sleeve of her shirt.
“Hi.”
“I’m sorry for bothering you,” you said, keeping your eyes locked on the darkening sky. “I just wanted to come find you to tell you that I understand if you don’t—want me like that anymore. I’ll leave you alone if you want me to.”
Even when she took her time responding, you didn’t dare look her way.
“Is that what you want?” You couldn’t quite decipher the tone she’d used.
“Obviously not,” you said mildly. “I would never want that.”
“I wouldn’t either.”
Your breath caught in your throat, your gaze dropping to meet hers. You were just about to speak when—
“The scanner wasn’t defective,” said Ellie. Her voice was soft, her own eyes falling to look at her tattooed arm.
“Of course it was,” you said, feeling very confused as to why she was suddenly detouring into something so unrelated. “If it wasn’t, you’d be dead already.”
“I’ve been bitten twice.”
You blinked, sure you’d heard her incorrectly. “Sorry?”
“I’ve been bitten twice,” said Ellie again, this time with more conviction. “That’s why the scanner came back red. There was nothing wrong with it.”
“Then how…” Your words trailed off.
She didn’t let you ponder long. “I’m immune.”
Immune.
You closed your mouth—it’d been hanging open unceremoniously for a moment—and tried to fit this very startling fact in with everything else you knew about her. What did being immune mean? And why was she telling you now?
“You knew from the start that you couldn’t come with me to Terranova,” you realized aloud.
Ellie was gnawing at her bottom look as she looked back at you. You noted that she didn’t offer up any corrections.
“Why didn’t you just tell me?” You couldn’t hide the hurt in your voice. “Why did you lie to me like that?”
“I found out that I was immune when I was back in Boston,” Ellie said, the words spilling out of her. “I was in this abandoned mall with my best friend—Riley. She told me she was leaving to be a Firefly, and I begged her to stay and kissed her and for a moment I was so sure that something was going to change between us—something for the better. But then…” She waved her tattooed arm in front of her. “We both got bit. I survived. She, obviously, did not.”
Something deep inside you twisted as you tried to imagine how traumatizing that must’ve been for someone that couldn’t have been older than 14.
“And so I thought that maybe, you were my chance to right what I’ve done wrong,” continued Ellie. Even though she wasn’t looking at you anymore, you could see the reflective sheen of tears in her eyes. “I’ve gotten to live while so many other people have died. I just can’t handle another. It’s not fair of me to keep someone here when there’s somewhere safer for them. It’s selfish, and I’ve been that enough.”
It was as if you’d found the last puzzle piece for the jigsaw of Ellie Williams. All this time, you’d been struggling in your attempts to understand why she was pushing you away—and why she changed her mind so suddenly.
Now you got it. Ellie had come into this knowing that she’d likely never see you again. She’d been betting on it, even. It was all some convoluted way for her to set things right in her head, for her to forgive herself for Riley and whoever else she’d lost.
“You could have told me,” you said, your voice barely above a whisper. “I would have understood.”
Ellie sent you a sad smile, shaking her head. “I’m not supposed to tell anyone that I’m immune. It’s one of those things that only Joel and Maria and Tommy know about. No one else. They’d fucking kill me if they found out you knew.”
“I’m really sorry.” The fabric of her t-shirt was soft under your fingers as you rested a hand on her shoulder.
“I’m really sorry for how much of an asshole I was to you,” said Ellie. You didn’t miss the way her eyes had widened when you’d reached out to touch her. “I didn’t want to be that way. I always wanted more. I just couldn’t handle having that, knowing that you were going to leave anyway. I thought it’d be easier for the both of us if you thought I was awful.”
“Didn’t work very well.”
“Clearly.”
“I forgive you,” you said, moving your hand so you could thread your fingers into the loose strands that she hadn’t pulled into that baby bun she always wore.
Instead of kissing you like you thought she might, she threw her arms around you and crushed herself against you, burying her face into your neck.
You held her there, feeling the way her frame trembled under the weight of a sob and tracing patterns across her back.
“I missed you,” you whispered, your chin rested atop her shoulder. “I thought about you every day.”
Ellie clung to you harder as you shifted.
“I’m really sorry,” she said again, muffled against your neck. “I’m sorry for everything.”
“I’m not.” You finally pulled away so that she had to look you in the eyes. Under the soft bath of moonlight, her green eyes glowed. “Terranova shouldn’t have existed in the first place. I’m glad that I got out. And I’m even more glad that it brought me back to you.”
Her hand found yours, your fingers tangling.
“I used to spend all my free time wondering what you were doing up North,” said Ellie. You felt her thumb brush across the top of your hand. “I thought that maybe if I imagined you happy, it’d be easier.”
“What did you think I was doing?”
The corner of her mouth quirked up. “Lots of studying, I assumed. And going to fancy events for rich people, eating all that expensive shit that the rest of the world can’t have.”
“Not far off,” you admitted. “But you missed how much time I’d spend wondering about you. I dreamt about you all the time. Sometimes I’d see people who looked similar to you and it’d ruin my whole day. I couldn’t believe that you were gone. I think that deep down I knew that you weren’t.”
She squeezed your hand. When you looked down at where you were touching, you noted how there wasn’t such a stark difference between you and her anymore. The doll fresh-out-of-the-box skin had disappeared in favor of scars and marks collected from your time in the real world.
“I really thought you’d be safe there,” said Ellie.
“You don’t need to worry about me like that anymore,” you told her, cupping her face with your free hand. Her eyelids fluttered half-closed as she leaned into the contact. “You’ve done enough. You can care about me without taking responsibility for everything bad that ever happens to me. You deserve to have something good without suffering because of it. I promise I’m not going anywhere.”
“Not anymore,” she agreed.
When you kissed her, it felt like coming home. There was something so achingly familiar in the slope of her neck, the slight chapped-ness of her lips, the almost silent click of her jaw as her mouth parted with a gasp as your hands twisted in her hair.
You weren’t quite sure how you managed a year without it.
The skin of her neck was just as soft as you remembered against your lips, her response just as reactive.
“What’s this?” you asked, pulling away to point at what looked like a small tattoo on the side of her neck. You hadn’t noticed it before—her hair had been covering it.
“Oh.” Ellie looked sheepish. “My free birthday tattoo from Cat. It’s the moon.”
“I see that,” you murmured, brushing her hair back more intentionally to get a better look at it. “Why that phase?”
“It’s the phase it would’ve been on the day we met,” said Ellie. She was bright red now. “Don’t fucking laugh. I know that it’s stupid. Shut up. Stop!”
You desperately tried to stop your giggles, schooling your face into something straight and no-nonsense.
“I spent so long wondering if you even liked me,” you told her. “And now you’ve gone and gotten a tattoo dedicated to me. I feel so validated.”
Ellie rolled her eyes.
“I have you beat, though,” you said, quieter now.
She looked back at you, her brows furrowed. “Huh?”
“When it comes to grand, stupid gestures,” you explained, your finger pointing up to the sky in the general area that you’d collected your data from. “There’s a planet named Ellie up there now.”
Her jaw dropped for just a moment. “You’re kidding.”
“No.” Now you were feeling slightly self-conscious.
“You would do something like that,” Ellie muttered, more to herself than anything. “A whole fucking planet.”
You let her drape an arm around you, pulling you into her until your head fit into the space between her shoulder and her chin.
“So,” Ellie said, and you could feel the words vibrate in her diaphragm, “What now?”
“What do you mean, what now?”
“I mean, what are you gonna do now that you’re stuck here with me for the foreseeable future?”
“Enjoy being stuck with you,” you said. “Maybe get a matching tattoo. Give you the piece of the meteorite I nabbed from the display case in my lab. But mostly spend my time bothering you.”
When she didn’t answer, you shifted so you could look up at her. She was already looking back, her eyes soft and the corners of her lips pulling into two dimples.
“Is that alright with you?’ you ventured.
Her arm tightened around you, fingers gently pressing into the flesh of your forearm like she still couldn’t quite believe you were there.
“You can be so fucking stupid sometimes,” she said. “I get a tattoo for you and you’re still asking if I want you around.”
“It’s been known for you to make rash decisions,” you offered dryly. “I didn’t want to jump to any assumptions.”
She rolled her eyes, still smiling down at you, eyes awash with the reflections of the stars above.
Slowly, you reached up and touched her face again, letting your fingers relearn her features, tracing the paths created by freckles—just like you had in her bed all those months ago.
But unlike last time, she didn’t stop you. She didn’t do anything except let you. There was something in her demeanor, something that was fragile and vulnerable and everything that you wanted her to be with you.
“Is this going to be enough for you?” she asked suddenly, her voice raw.
“What do you mean?” Your fingers paused and rested at her cheekbones.
“It’s just—” She blinked hard and cast her gaze up to the sky. “You grew up so differently than me. I’m not going to be able to give you that fancy Terranova life. Are you sure this is going to make you happy?”
“Yes.”
She looked at you, an eyebrow raised skeptically. Your hands moved to cup her face, fingers threading back into her hair.
“Don’t make that face,” you chided.
“I just find it really hard to believe.”
You took in a breath. Perhaps more elaboration was in order.
“I’ll put it like this,” you said. “I spent most of my life thinking I needed to be something extraordinary to be happy. I put so much time into trying to be special and nothing I did ever felt like it was enough. But then I met you, and one day I realized while I was here that I didn’t need that anymore. Just being around you makes me more content than I’ve ever been. I don’t want to be like what I was before. I would consider it my greatest success if I got to lead an ordinary life with you.”
You took her brief silence as an opportunity to press your lips to the corner of her mouth.
“Believe me now?” you asked.
Ellie nodded, leaning in to drop an affectionate kiss at the top of your nose.
And as you sat there, nestled into the warmth of her side and craning your head up to the sky, you’d never been more sure of yourself.
This would be more than enough.
final a/n: ok so some apologies are in order for this one! first of all, sorry for aborting jj lmao. i just couldn't envision doing light speed travel with a baby strapped to dina. big apologies for not including a final smut scene. i actually had one semi-drafted out because i wanted to write one where ellie bottomed bc i feel like it would really hammer in that she was finally choosing to be vulnerable, but the shift in the scene tone just didn't sit right with me. sometimes i write bonus scenes for big fics like this, so if there's enough interest i might write a short one shot of the scene i scrapped/other scenes that i also scrapped. also, speaking of things i scrapped: i had an alternate ending in mind where joel actually did die and ellie went on her seattle rampage + y/n realizes she's alive and tries to sneak out with dina to find her. i might end up writing that one too, depending on interest! anyway, thank you all for coming along on this journey with me so far! it's not totally over yet...the epilogue is still in the works! i appreciate hearing what you guys think of this and hope you all enjoyed !!!
also idk if this is important to bring up but i will say that i didn't realize the kind of message i'd be sending when i wrote a protagonist who's from a place like terranova—exoplanet isn't meant to be some sort of piece that makes you empathize with ignorant beneficiaries of slave labor...it's just the way it shook out and for that i'm sorry 😭
#ellie williams x reader#ellie williams x you#ellie williams imagine#ellie williams x oc#ellie williams x y/n
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Instead of posting pointless callouts, use your brains.
tldr: some of yall need to learn what a fucking block button is
Genuinely what is so hard about pressing the block button? Like omg I promise no one cares about your fuckass callout posts or rants. Like some of these people are embarrassing as hell. If you get triggered by shit on the internet, it’s YOUR decision on wether or not you want to interact or block and move on with your life. Like brother, i’m not going to throw a fit and freak out over some post that just so happened to contain weird shit on it. You know what I do? I MOVE ON WITH MY LIFE. Because I got better shit to worry about than some random ass fic on tumblr.
You like ddlg? Cool. Doesn’t hurt me or anyone, I don’t care. You like incest? Good for you! You like noncon? Okay! Like do y’all see how easy it is to just smile and nod? Trust, policing what people post and enjoy, is not going to change shit. It’s just annoying as fuck. People pick and choose, because some of the shit you all consume wouldn’t be considered normal either, going by what you all say.
According to all of your logic, blood kinks, knife kinks, gun kinks, piss kinks, and etc. should not be normalized either. Murder shouldn’t be written about, especially gore. Which is fucking moronic, considering how RE is built on violence and gore. Please, learn how to separate fiction from reality.
Many people are fans of iconic slasher films and horror movies. Michael Myers is a rapist and a murderer. But guess what? No one CARES! Because he’s not REAL. I could go on with so much more examples, but you should get the point by now. Hopefully. Dark content is everywhere, why is it now that it’s weird? Makes no fucking sense.
I get that some of you don’t want your precious white boy’s image to be tainted or defamed or whatever, but trust, Leon Kennedy is not reading these fics nor would he care. ‘He’s not a rapist or into incest!’, well he also wouldn’t call you ‘sweetheart’ or whatever cheesy bs fluff fics contain nowadays. But that’s the whole point, isn’t it? It’s all OOC. We KNOW he’s not a horrible person or an incredibly affectionate lover, but people write whatever they want. And no one’s going to stop them! Not the posts clogging up the tags or the weird asks.
There’s so much more, but the main arguments that keep being repeated are ‘it’s weird’ and ‘if you write about it, you’re probably going to do it in real life’. That take is so fucking stupid I can’t help but laugh. Same bs as white moms claiming their son is going to shoot some place out just because he plays violent video games. The whole point? SEPARATE FICTION FROM REALITY. And if you don’t like something? IGNORE IT? Why are you willingly engaging like omg are you stupid or dumb.
OH AND. ‘kids could see this!’ When will you all learn that no matter what you do, you cannot control what a person sees or decides to interact with. Especially minors. I’m willing to bet half of a smut writers followers are minors. Guess what? People lie all the time, about their ages and whatever else. It’s the fucking internet, of course they do. It’s not the responsibility of the blog owner to take care of children. The most they could do is plaster a big fat MDNI on their blog, that’s it. It’s the job of the parents to control what their kid watches or consumes, and we can’t exactly help with that. So don’t pretend to gaf about minors like omg.
Anyways. I’m too lazy to continue writing like I just needed to say this because some of you are slow. Me and many others are going to continue to write whatever the fuck we want. In conclusion? Block if you don’t like it LMAO. I don’t care about what some rando has to say on the internet.
#🪼☆.thinking#leon kennedy x reader#leon kennedy x y/n#leon kennedy x you#leon s kennedy x reader#leon s kennedy x y/n#leon s kennedy x you#dark content#some of yall r DUMB
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Literally fuck all of you, a trans woman gets killed and the entire website gets flooded with information about it. And then a teenage trans guy who got kicked out of his parents house for being trans gets murdered on a date by a transphobe, and the ONLY people I see talking about it are transmen. Most of the posts about this kid have under 100 notes. Will someone PLEASE care about transmen? And the news is already burying it as "violence against women". I've already seen one of the stupid fucking TERFS on this website say they're glad he got killed because "all men" or whatever
And if i keep having to deal with seeing stupid fucking transandrophobia deniers be all like, well transwomen have it WORSE than transmen sweaty :) tmen have male privilege (: how about yall shut up
#omg im the op#transandrophobia#vent#if i have to be a one person news outlet to talk about this poor kid and put him on some peoples radar i fucking will#im tired of us getting erased and the violence against us ignored
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edge
pairing: cody rhodes x black reader
warning: its just smut yall. cody is fully my man my man my man so imma just post this here. cody girls come get your juice and minors please do not interact.
word count: 975
warm thick air, pulsing to life with an unadulterated lust. your tongue slipping over your kiss swollen lips, the dampened slope of your back arching. breaths shallow and the heat in your belly threatening to end itself with a great bursting. you groan, out of desperation, out of madness, out of pleasure. a raspy "fuck", that assaults the air. cuts into the thick of it. and the trembling in your thighs is vicious. ill-controlled. suffering under the weight of his palms but reduced to tremblings all the same. the muscles there aching and worn by the prying he's taken to them.
and he is relentless. cody is relentless. tender lips and his tongue even more so. pursing to kiss at your clit, catching it up in the seam of them before his tongue meets the swollen bud to do a pleasured sort of violence.
"i'm sorry".
something pretty and faint and begging. like the easy floating of a feather daring to disturb the air.
your nails roughing into already disarrayed sheets. clawing and palming till your fingers are digging inward to fist at the cool white linen. this chill that courses your skin, rippling till it pulses your core, a warning of its own. the edge just where release is sweetest, is near enough to feel, palpable and scorching to the skin. but he won't let you have it. won't let the heat dissipate from skin and bones. not till the satisfaction in him pools over to drown the grudge stuck to his resolve.
but maybe you deserved this, having been so risky earlier. the way the slow stubborn dragging of your nails had run into the strength of his leg. more teasing than sharp, and of course, you'd chosen a pretty powered blue to match the color of his suit and tie. coaxing a rushing in his blood. and your warm palm had slipped over his pants till they played against his inner thigh, inching closer to the heat of his crotch till you caressed and kneaded under the white cloth of the table. working him to life as you went about the evening. laughing and chatting and socializing with others at the restaurant dinner table.
it'd been a game for you. touching him and abandoning him. testing the limits of his poker face.
and when his lips had met the curve of your ear, breaths heavy and uneven, you just knew you'd had him where you wanted him. full of need and bordering desperate.
"are you having fun?"
"yes".
your teeth take a coy tensing to your lip. his eyes blue and hot and vengeful. mouth kissing at your cheek.
"good". his perfect teeth baring for a smile. in a fashion that others would deem warm. but you knew him well enough to know that it was all show. "have it now. you wont be able to later".
and he's made every word of his true. slipping wet over your skin with his lips and his tongue and the pinch of his teeth. teasing and building till pleasure simmered to a boiling.
"what happened to the fun you were having?"
his words mocking and the pull of his thumbs against your lower lips invasive and exposing. your pussy pulsing, feening to cling to anything as he takes the time to stare down as his handy work. slick glistening strings of spit and arousal, a lustful mixing as it slips slow over your opening to soak into the sheets. and his breath is hot against the fat of your swollen clit. his wet drooling tongue flicking over till your hips attempt to rut into his mouth. and his tie still wraps about his collar, loosened and sullied by wrinkles. his suit jacket somewhere strewn across the floor along with his shoes. because thats all he could suffer long enough with before pushing your legs to spread open and over.
and he speaks with a mix of taunt and fascination. cock hard, pulsing in his pants. a terrible ache that nearly spins his head. "you always get so greedy. so wet. so desperate".
his fingers, gripping into your supple flesh, grows tight. a groan breaking from him into your skin as he takes to sucking at you again. face burying further till his tongue is stroking pass your lush entrance. feeling the desperate cling of your pussy, and the deep trembling in your body. soft whines and whimpers, shuddered breaths and crying pleads. an urgency fighting its way about, slipping under hot near burning skin, pushing into your fingers till you're clawing through blonde hair and nailing into the roots.
and he keeps you here. spread and messy. laboring through the build of release again. his tongue taking to a deft, artful fucking. thumb soaked as he presses it to your clit. curls in to rub hastily. and the song of pleasure is terribly amorous. silence of the air arrested by your begging and his relentless mouth squelching as it feeds in to savor the drip of your arousal.
it's so close, you can feel it settling heavy into your body. a pressure great enough to create diamonds.
cody moans. somewhat delirious. his mouth and his touch switching. licking a flat broad strip as his thumb pushes in to stroke through the tight clutch of your heat.
a tear slips into the sheets. your hips rutting mindless. fingers pulling and pinching at your breast till your nipples catch. the taut skin sensitive and ridden with an aching that begs silently to be relieved.
and of course, when you teeter over the edge, body rife with pleasure, the sweet torture of him abandons you. neglects you to tremble and pulse desperate. left only with the faint simple kisses of his mouth as he waits with a statues patience for your body to settle into dissatisfaction once more.
#cody rhodes#cody rhodes fanfic#cody rhodes fanfiction#cody rhodes smut#cody rhodes x reader#cody rhodes x black reader#cody rhodes fic#cody rhodes imagine#joannasteez#100% a cody girl now
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Hello, can I request some wild sanguinius? I am attracted to his bloodlust being a predator and he asked me how it would be if he does it in that state with his beloved or even with leman in Mating Press March
Day eleven
I got a case of brain rot on this one and had to do something. So yall get post battle Sangy. Also sorry for another short one I was running around all day and still feeling like shit.
Pairing: Sanguinius x reader
Warnings: Blood, Animalistic sex, sex in a thunderhawk, descriptions of violence (not towards you)
Three weeks, three agonizing weeks.
Sanguinius's nerves were shot as he landed, his mind a mire of dark and sinister things. Blood, flesh, death, consumption, lust.
Three weeks since he'd last seen you, the battling was too dangerous on the ground for you to be there. But not that the fighting was at a lull he was confident that you would be safe.
In his arms, you'd always be safe.
"Bring her to me." Sanguinius rumbled. His son nodded, not needing to ask who. It was his mother, of course. The Mother of angels. The wife of Sanguinius.
The order was sent up the line till it was in the right hands to have you ferried down to your husband's side.
It didn't take long. The adrenaline of battle had waned slightly, replaced by a new sensation. The need to claim. The need to have and to sow, not only destroy.
Three weeks, he kept thinking of blood and smoke and too little rest, too little comfort.
But soon he would have you. He would have you to hold and to kiss and to bed again and again.
He stood there, his eyes fixed on the sky from where he knew the thunderhawk would return. He ran his tongue over his canines and daydreamed about you.
"Father? Are you alright?" A younger blood angel asked and Sanguinius nodded.
"Quite, I am just.. eager to see your mother again."
"You must love her very much."
"I do." He nodded and smiled down at his son, shifting his weight from one foot to another.
The sound of roaring engines drew his gaze back to the sky.
His wings fluffed in anticipation and he nearly took to the sky to intercept the ship to get to you faster, but he did not for fear of damaging the vessel and causing you harm.
It landed and Sanguinius approached, his hearts hammering as he knew what awaited him within.
Hauling open the door he entered, your personal escort of astartes turning and giving their father his due respect.
"All of you out. I need some time to speak with your mother privately."
They didn't argue, stepping from the hawk without a question asked. They knew better than to impede on their gene sires alone time with his wife. The door hissed shut behind him leaving you both alone.
"Sanguinius, I've missed you so much." You went to him, careful not to put your hand in a patch of blood. Which wasn't easy.
"As I have you my dove." His body was trembling with need. The fighting was done for now. Now it was time for something else.
"Gosh, Sangy, your armor is almost as red as our sons." You chuckled. Yes, your sons. Both of yours, Sanguinius adored how much his sons seemed to care for you.
Sanguinius fell to his knees taking you in his arms as he listened to the sound of your laugh. He hadn't heard anything so sweet in weeks.
"Please, my dove, I know we've just reunited. But I need you."
You nodded, needing him as well.
There was a wild sort of desperation in his eyes that you recognized immediately. It was the same one you often saw after he returned from battle. "Of course my love. Let me just undress and then-"
He pounced without a moment's warning. Your back was on the floor and he was pulling his codpiece away with reckless abandon. shredding the body glove underneath with it.
His fangs sank into the rich cloth of your dress, and with a jerk of his head was reduced to scraps of ragged fabric.
"Sangunius!" You gasped in shock.
His tongue ran up your body, growling in frustration when he was impeded by the bra baring your chest from him. Sanguinius tore it away, the fabric and padding sundered as if they were nothing more than tissue paper.
His tongue began again, his teeth snagging your underwear as he pulled it to lacey pieces.
Your fingers grasped at his golden locks. Your voice cried out wordlessly as he dug in, lapping at your entrance like a starving animal. The coppery scent of the dried blood on his armor made your head spin, and it certainly wasn't helped by the pleasure your husband was pressing upon you from between your legs.
His name spilled from your lips in a whine as he let his tongue drift up farther, lapping over your body, tasting your skin.
His cock throbbed, painfully hard as he locked his lips with yours, You could taste your own juices, and blood. Whose it had been you would never know. He would never tell, you would never ask.
His cock pressed against your wet heat and he growled pushing into the tight clinging walls of his love after three weeks of being apart.
He took your legs and easily pressed them up against your chest, holding them there with his body. Your hands went to his cheeks, your thumbs running over them in a quiet form of affection.
"Oh my dove." He purred, eyes fluttering shut. "How I've missed you."
Your reply ended abruptly as he pulled out and thrust back in.
Your head fell back unto the cold metal floor as he fucked you.
It was not gentle as it so often was, but animalistic and needy. His voice raised as he raked his finger over the floor, searching for some sort of purchase to stabilize himself.
His wings shivered behind him, brushing the walls as he let out the pent up need that had been building.
All the blood he'd spilled, all the lives ended by his hands had been done for you. Outwardly they'd been for the imperium, for his father's dream. But that wasn't the reason in his hearts. Every time he'd closed his eyes he'd see you. Smiling up at him with a bundle of joy in your arms. Safe on yet another world brought to compliance by the efforts of himself and your sons.
He loved how you took to them so immediately and how naturally the title of mother had come to you. Soon he would see you taking to the title in a whole new light.
You were panting and moaning under his armored body, practically squished against the floor as he pressed you down. Your walls clenched around him and he felt you cum at the same time you screamed his name. Your mind lost to the pleasure of taking your husband's cock after being apart for so damn long.
"Yes, Dove, come for me." He growled, his voice rumbling through you.
The utter bliss on your face drove him to the edge and he slipped over it, his wings flaring and beating against the walls of the thunderhawk.
He poured his love into you, physically, emotionally and verbally.
Petting your hairs as he cooed how much he loved you, adored you, needed you.
It wasn't how you had expected your time with him to go. At least not right away. Sanguinius rolled onto his back carrying you with him.
You raised your head and laughed a little. "And here i was thinking i had missed you the most."
Sanguinius kissed up your throat lovingly. "I have been needing you every day for three weeks."
"So I see."
You looked around and laughed some more. It looked like someone had taken a chain blade to a giant goose. "We made quite the mess."
Bloodstained feathers littered the floor and Sanguinius looked around, joining you in your laughter. It felt good to laugh with such happiness.
"That we did my dove. That we did."
He picked you up after a time and wrapped you in the fur that had hung from his armor.
You didn't want to go, but there was clean up left to do. He promised to have you sent for again as soon as he possibly could.
Leaving the ship, his armor back in order his sons didn't quite look at him. Their cheeks red with embarrassment. But then again they hadn't been expecting their parents to rock a thunderhawk."Well my sons. shall we get back to it?" They all nodded eagerly and Sanguinius suppressed an amused smile knowing they'd likely never forget this. And the primarch wondered, just how those who had been close by would react when he and their mother inevitably announce the arrival of a new sibling.
With a sigh he put the amusing thought aside and returned to his duties.
#warhammer 40k#warhammer#primarch x reader#40k#my writing#primarchs#warhammer 40k x reader#primarch#sanguinius x reader#Mating Press March
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Introducing... *drum roll*
The Greatest Showman AU! In which I now name as "What's Written in the Stars" (WWITS, for short)
Context at the bottom of each pic! (CW: Violence)
Also, will give more info on what I'm planning to do with this AU at the very bottom (after the cut) so read the full thing please :D
Assistive Care Attendant / Trapeze Act Sun: Each clothing design is for specific phases of the plot. The one with the apron is whilst Sun is still with his owner (him and Moon). The apron get-up is the male robots' default clothing after having been manufactured to become assistive robots for the rich— ofc with different colours that fit the scheme of the robot. The one on the left is showcasing his first time joining the circus, having almost stabbed in the faceplate seconds later by you, Y/N (unintentionally). And, the one on the top is him, a year into joining the circus.
Assistive Care Attendant / Trapeze Act Moon: Each clothing design is for specific phases of the plot. The one where he is tied up is when the Afton virus took hold of his programming having almost killed the father of the children that he and Sun are giving care to. The one on the right is where he's finally gotten the virus at a more stable control through your help and was finally allowed to perform overnight in the circus. And ofc, the one on the top is what he wears when performing.
Laundry Worker / Knife Throwing Act Y/N: I tried to make your design as androgynous as I could I hope I didn't butcher that. Anyhow, you carry a lot of trauma and painful experiences in this plot as an immigrant, orphan, and a very obvious person-of-color, you aren't always welcomed in where you live but you do have good people who took you in after your parents were brutally murdered as a child. You now work in your rescuers' laundry shop— well, not until you joined the circus.
My plans for this AU?
Currently the chapters are in the works, I'm writing Chapter 1 down as this gets posted. My goal is only a total of 5 (long, and will be divided into and released per parts) chapters for the entire plot.
I will also try (emphasis on try) to make a few storyboards I had in mind for this AU, y'know just to make things more interesting. More designs will be showcased sooner or later, as this AU is not only applicable to you and the Assistive Care Attendants (ACA) but also the other main bots of the canon plot of security breach.
Oh also! If you're not familiar with or haven't seen The Greatest Showman just yet, you don't have to see it to understand this AU. This AU can honestly be seen as a standalone AU where you live in the 1850s-1860s and technology started booming because of Fazbear Co (run by Henry Emily, William's co-founder in the canon series; William Afton will have a bit of a different role in the AU) and all that jazz. But unless you don't want spoilers for The Greatest Showman, don't learn more about this AU since it contains A LOT of references, plots, and designs similar to what's portrayed in the movie. Otherwise, have fun getting to know this when I release the first part of the first chapter and so on! :D
This might be one of the biggest things I'll ever make and I'm glad I got these ideas just as the new year is arriving. At least I know what my new year's resolution will be lmao. I hope you guys tune in for more! I have so much love and so much in store for this AU— so much!
Thanks for reading, love you <3
Ps. I rarely say this but reblogs > likes
I appreciate them both btw! I just think it's better for yalls to spread this around so some people who might enjoy this AU would get to see it evolve over time :)
#the greatest showman au#moondrop#sundrop#y/n x sundrop#y/n x moondrop#fnaf security breach au#wwits#laursdraws
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The Fire In Your Eyes
part VIII: horseshoe overlook iv
pairing: Arthur Morgan x fem!reader
word count: 15.2k
summary: it's time for the train job, the biggest job you've ever done. You've got a bad feeling about it, and by the end you wish you would have listened to your gut.
a/n: Surprise! Early post! Thank you for your patience with this chapter! Yall know I always upload on Wednesday, but i was so sick that i couldn't write, and i had to go to the ER on tuesday night to get fluids. Anyway, this has been the scariest chapter to write ever. Don't kill me please and please don't give up on this series... love yall, don't yell at me and please trust me. This chapter was too long and got split into two parts: part two will be posted in three days time.
beta read by @margowritesthings
warnings: violence, death, minors dni, 18+
series extras
SERIES MASTERPOST
Arthur leaves long before you even wake up, heading back down to Blackwater to find Sean. It gives you a sick feeling in your stomach, but you trust he’ll be okay. Arthur is smart, and even though he's good at getting himself in sticky situations, he's equally good at getting out of them. It doesn't do much to help your worry, but it’s all you can cling to for right now.
You swirl your half empty cup of coffee in your hand, leaning down for the percolator to reheat it. The fire is warm, alongside the sun, and you find yourself grateful for the off the shoulder shirt you’d picked up a few days ago. It's the perfect temperature you think, tasting the bitter coffee. You're startled out of your thoughts by a weary presence.
“Penny for your thoughts, ma’am?” Kieran asks, walking passed to sit down opposite of you on a crate. He looks nervous, like he was afraid to come sit, and you feel sorry for it. Kieran seems like a nice man, just someone who was in the wrong place at the wrong time.
“Just thinkin’ about all that's goin’ on… I see they let you live, huh?” You chuckle, and Kieran nods, nervously.
“Well Mr. Morgan convinced Dutch to let me stay, I thought maybe that was your doin.” Kieran says, and your eyebrow pings up in shock.
“Did he now?” You hum, surprised by Arthur’s choice, “No, That was all Mr. Morgan. Well good for you, I just hope he won’t regret it.”
“Oh he won’t! I'm real good with horses, miss, worked in a stable most my life. I’m sure I can be of help with anything you folks need, especially in that regard. I can do anything, even latrines. I’ll earn my keep, miss, I will.” Kieran stutters and you nod, eyeing him over.
“But speakin’ of horses… that palomino over there, the blue eyed one, is she yours?” Kieran asks, nodding towards Athena, who has her neck to the ground, tearing through the bale of hay there. You smile, watching as she pins her ears at Old Boy, keeping the hay for herself.
“Yeah, she’s mine. Just got her since we’ve been here.” You smile, and Kieran takes note of her configuration.
“She looks like a thoroughbred. Nice and tall, lean and muscular.” Kieran points out, and you hum at his accuracy.
“She is.” You respond, eyeing whether or not Kieran has a motive or if he's just a lover of all things equine. You sip at your bitter coffee, letting him speak for himself.
“Y’know palomino thoroughbreds are of the rare sort, n’ with those blues? Well you got a real fine animal, miss.” Kieran says, doting over your mare. You smile, making a note to mention Kieran’s knowledge of horses to Arthur. Maybe that could be his designated contribution. At least he’d be doing something he enjoys instead of getting harassed and threatened by the gang all day.
“Thank you.” You hum, drinking the rest of your coffee.
"Well I reckon I better take my coffee and head back to shuckin' corn till they give me a better job. But it was real nice talkin' to you, miss. You're the first person who's treated me like a person rather than an animal since I've been here." Kieran smiles, filling up his cup with the percolator before nodding to you and heading back to Pearson's wagon. You frown, feeling sorry for him. You were lucky enough to have been found by Arthur, but it could have gone any other way. O'Driscolls could have found you first, and you could be in Kieran's shoes right now.
Sighing, and taking your cup of coffee, you stand up and walk past Strauss's tent, ignoring his greeting. There's a little log sitting near the edge of the cliff behind his tent, and it's a perfect little spot to sit and think. Not wanting to be bothered, your eyes stay pinned on the log as you make your way towards it. The view is breathtaking, you can see everything from the Dakota River to the tops of the Grizzlies from the spot as you sit down, drinking in the warm air. It's a secluded little area, far enough from camp to get away from the arguments and bickering, but close enough for safety. You're enjoying your solitude, watching two bucks fight down below the cliff, they're antlers are stuck together as they rip and rug. It's an interesting sight, until it's interrupted by a throat clearing behind you.
"John." You sigh, annoyed not with his presence but the fact that you know why he's here.
"Nice to see you too." John chuckles, bringing his leg over the log to sit next to you with a cigarette between his lips.
“Gotta get some supplies for this train job, I could use an extra hand that ain't a dumbass.” John asks, leaning backwards to stretch. You sigh, not wanting to even think about the damn train job. But nonetheless, you nod.
“Sure. What exactly is your plan for goin’ about it?” You ask, scooching towards John as he pinches the cigarette between his fingers, shaking it before tossing it on the ground. He pulls a map from his pocket, unfolds the heavily used paper, and holds it out for you to see.
“Trains' comin’ from Riggs Station. It’s dropping off its security detail in The Heartlands, and after dark it’s heading down to Rhodes to pick up the next regiment.” He explains, tracing his finger over the paper from Riggs Station to Rhodes.
“So it’ll be completely unguarded for this whole stretch of tracks?” You ask. It sounds too good to be true, but you know that John and Arthur have done this enough by now. They know how to get proper information. But the idea of the train job still makes your stomach flip with anxiety as you’ve never robbed anything as big as a train.
“Well, not exactly. The security that they’re payin the big bucks for won’t be there, but we expect a few armed passengers, and some local boys guardin’ the train for extra cash. It won't be completely unguarded, but it sure as hell won’t be a militia like you’d expect.”
You nod, taking the map from his hands gently, and looking it over.
“Where do we board, n’ how are we boardin’ it?” You ask, and John places his index finger over a little area labeled Dewberry Creek, just past the Lemoyne/New Hanover stateline.
“Here. We’ll have to stop the train, or it’ll take us right into town. I figure we get an oil wagon, ease it over the tracks. When that train comes through and sees that oil? It’ll stop just fine. We board her, encourage those rich bastards to give up their grammy’s pearls and we ride out.” John explains, tucking the map back into his pocket.
“Alright… seems like a solid plan.” You admit, ignoring your gut, “Where do we get a full oil wagon?” You ask, dusting some dirt off of your new jeans.
“That’s where you come in. Only place I reckon we find one is the oil fields, out in The Heartlands, you know of it?”
You shake your head no, “Uh-uh.”
“Well it's well guarded for the most part, but most of those guys sleep or drink on the job. And they don’t get paid enough to give a damn. I’m heading over now to scout the place out, get an idea of the schedule. Thought maybe you could tag along, put that head to use instead of washin’ clothes for old Susan.”
You raise an eyebrow, unsure if he's just complimented you or insulted you, but still, you nod.
“Alright. Let me pack some stuff, I’ll meet you by the horses.”
John nods as you walk back towards your tent. With a sigh, you pull the canvas open. Your saddle bag is sitting on your bed, and you stuff it with some provisions and a change of clothes, then decide that you’ll need to grab some more ammo from Arthur's tent just in case. Once everything is all packed and settled, you swing your saddlebag over your shoulder and head back out. You stop around the back of Arthur’s wagon, picking up a few cases of express bullets and some throwing knives from the makeshift armory.
“What does she want from him now? I never liked hearin' about her…” Marybeth hisses, and you look up, startled, realizing she is standing in Arthur’s tent. You’re peeking around the back of the wagon, eavesdropping as Marybeth places a crisp white envelope on Arthur’s bedside table.
“I always thought Mary was nice…” Tilly responds, picking up the envelope and looking it over before returning it.
“Nice like a patch of poison ivy.” Marybeth bites, and Tilly rolls her eyes.
“You didn’t even know her. Not when she was really around, anyway. She was always kind, just… didn’t agree with our life. Can you blame her?” Tilly sighs, and they walk out of the tent together.
Your eyebrows pull together, and you walk around the outside of his tent until you're at the entrance. You hum, looking at the envelope before striding through his tent towards it. It’s upside down on his table, and you know you shouldn’t be snooping through his mail, but you pick it up and flip it over regardless. Written in sloppy cursive is ‘Arthur’ and you look after the lettering for a while. The paper is fancy, the kind that is expensive and only available in the city. Your finger trails over the lettering, and it itches to tear the red seal off and read the contents, but you restrain yourself. You know if the roles were reversed Arthur would respect your privacy. Sighing, you place the envelope back and meet John by the horses, wondering who Mary might be the whole way over. John is just climbing into the saddle when you approach.
“Ready to go?” He asks, settling himself down over Old Boy and checking the straps on his saddlebag.
“Sure.” You mumble, mounting up onto Athena and giving her a nice pat. Once you’re settled, the two of you start cantering out of the trails, nodding to Karen who is keeping watch. Instead of riding towards Valentine, John leads you out towards the Heartlands, into unfamiliar territory for you. You can’t help but think about those men, Milton and Ross, and wonder why in the hell you’re all robbing a train right now.
“Why does Dutch keep pushin’ this job?” You holler up, squeezing Athena to run faster after John.
“I got no idea.” He yells back to you. Once you run over the tracks the terrain changes from grass to dry, sandy dirt, and you try to keep Athena on the trail to avoid getting any rocks lodged in her shoes.
“It don’t make sense, we should be leavin. Now I don't want to, not at all, but there was Pinkertons right next to our camp, just a stone's throw away.” You shake your head, unbelieving of Dutch’s terrible call.
“Do you think they know where we are?” John asks, turning in his saddle a bit as he gallops on.
“No. No if they knew where we are they would have just came to camp… But still, approachin’ us like that when we had Jack with us? Tellin’ us, in front of him, what happened to Mac? They can all go to hell.” You hiss, and John goes quiet for a minute. All you can hear is hooves pounding as you wait for his response.
“You and Arthur had Jack?” John asks, like he's angry, but mostly surprised. Your eyebrows draw together, unsure of why it’s a big deal.
“Well, yeah. Abigail asked us to watch him for a bit, just to cheer him up.” You respond as he leads you up the bank towards Citadel Rock. John huffs loudly, rolling his eyes and shaking his head as if he disapproves.
“You got a problem with that?” You bite, noticing the tension in his shoulders, and his quiet, aggressive demeanor.
“She acts like I ain’t there… for her or the boy.” John hisses, shaking his head. It grows quiet again as you think back to Abigail’s pleading tears, begging you to take Jack because John wouldn't.
“Are you?” You ask, with some judgment. John really thinks about your question, slowing Old Boy to a trot as he comes up near the slope of Citadel Rock. He left them, but he came back, that counts for something in his eyes. Surely, it counts in Abigail’s eyes too….
“Well yeah!” John says defensively, “Im tryin’... tryin’ to get money for them at least, so she can raise the boy up proper.” John says, stopping his stallion at the edge of the cliff, overlooking The Heartlands. You pull Athena up alongside him, stopping so you can look him in the eyes.
“Money don’t matter if you ain’t there for ‘em.” You whisper, no harshness or judgment in your eyes, although he takes it with such, pulling back and scrunching up his face in anger.
“The hells that supposed to mean?” He bites, dropping his reins and throwing an arm in the air towards you. You keep your calm demeanor, only wanting to help the little family. You have no quarrels against John or his parenting, but you’re the one in camp watching Abigail comfort a crying Jack when his daddy isn't there to tuck him in night after night.
“It’s just…” You think over your words, tongue darting out over your lips, “Your boys' real upset, he misses ya John. Abigail won't admit it but she misses you too.” Your wrist rests on the horn of your saddle, toying with the leather reins as you watch John’s face soften. He sighs, eyes downcast as he runs his hand over his face, careful not to catch the healing stitches on his right side.
“You think?” He asks, looking up to you, and you nod your head up and down, sure.
“I don't know what I’m doin’ Star.” John sighs, doubting himself. It’s not that he doesn’t want to be there for Jack and Abigail, he doesn't know how to. He doesn't see himself cut out to be a father or a husband, and he has a hard time believing his family wants him around.
“None of us do,” You huff a laugh, thinking of your own situation with Arthur, “You just gotta try your best to do right by them.”
John nods, offering you a small, sad smile as he leans over to tap your knee in thanks. Without another word, but with a mutual understanding, you both dismount your horses. Then it’s time to get down to work. John takes both the horses, and he hitches them down the bank a ways so they can’t be seen from the roads or the fields. As he takes them away, you pull out your binoculars. Crouching, you look through the glass and take in the infamous Heartland Oil Fields. There is one big building, the factory, on the left side of the tracks that run straight through the place. On the right are smaller buildings, you’re presuming bunks, outhouses and storage rooms. The entire place is fenced in, except for where the tracks run through and the main entrance, guarded by two armed men. You search for an oil wagon, and find a few but you’re not sure which are empty or full. Armed guards stand all around the place, and there is a damn moat of oil ponds on the right perimeter. You pull the binoculars down, hearing John return as he walks up beside you. He too is eyeing the factory, face drawn up as he thinks over a plan.
“How do you reckon we go about this?” You ask, handing him over the binoculars. He takes them, and does the same look around that you’ve just had.
“We stay here and figure out their routine. They have a checkpoint at the front gate, so if we watch them long enough we’ll know which wagons are full and when. Then we slip in at night, once the workers have gone home. We’ll only have to get past the guards.” John explains and you sigh, nodding. You look up at the sun, holding your fingers up to the horizon. It’s nearly 4PM, you’re gonna be here for a while.
“Why don’t you make us a fire or somethin? And grab my bedroll too. This is uncomfortable as hell.” You ask of him as you plop down on the dirt, taking the first watch.
— — — —
“Star?” John mumbles, and you groan, eyelashes fluttering. You curl your knees in tighter until John shakes your shoulder.
“Star, get up. It’s time to go.” John says, and those four words alone pull you from your slumber, it's time to go.
In the past six hours you and John had traded shifts a handful of times, and both picked up the same pattern. A wagon is filled every hour on the hour, and then left for only ten minutes while the guards do their rounds. Once the ten minutes are up, the wagon is taken out the front gate by a heavily armed detail, and sent off. You had suggested earlier that it might be easier to steal the wagon after it leaves the oil fields, but John had said the risk of the oil wagon getting shot would be too high. So you stick with the original plan, leaving you only ten minutes to sneak into the place and sneak out with the wagon. It’ll be hard, but it’s your only option.
“They just started their rounds, hurry up.” John explains as you scramble to your feet. You notice he has the camp taken down already, and the fire is nothing but smoking ashes as you quickly roll up your bedroll. Quietly whistling for Athena, you wait for her to arrive before strapping down your bedroll and jumping onto her back. The ten minute countdown has already begun as you and John gallop down the hill.
“Which way do we go in?” You ask, running after John towards the right flank of the fenced oil fields.
“We're gonna come up on the right side, ditch the horses a ways out, and jump the fence. Wagon should be sitting right there. Then we just drive it right out the front gate.” John hollers back, slowing Old Boy down once you can see the fence. Coyotes yip and howl in The Heartlands, making the night even more eerie as you approach the factory. With the dark and the distance, none of the guards can see your horses as you both dismount and break for the fence. You shoo both horses, signaling them to flee. And then you're running, keeping your breaths controlled and steady as you watch out for any straggling guards. John reaches the fence before you do. It’s not very high and he easily jumps over it.
“C’mon!” John whispers as you throw yourself over the fence, landing painfully on your ankle with a wince. He grabs your elbow, pulling you along with him. Once you're inside, you take a look around to get your bearings. You see a few swinging lanterns in the distance, all guards on watch, but none of them look in your direction. Most of the lanterns near the bunk houses have been snuffed out for the night, leaving you to the shadows. You turn in the other direction and see exactly what you're looking for.
“Right there!” You whisper, pointing ahead to the wagon. It’s pulled in front of one of the tents, and John helps you run towards it. Two white shire horses are hooked up to the wagon, and you’re glad to see that they’re strong and agile.
“Go on, get up there. I’ll drive.” John says, hushed as he breaks away from you to get on the left side of the wagon. You’re not sure how much time you have, but surely it’s not much. Your heart pumps loudly in your ears as you climb up the side of the wagon, ignoring the slight pain in your ankle. John clambers up, and just as he reaches the bench seat you hear a low, deep growl. You snap your head around to catch the source and the blood runs from your face at the sight of a massive bloodhound. A guard dog. His jaw snaps as he snarls at you with a warning.
“John…?” You whisper, so quietly that he barely hears. He turns and sees the dog, and his eyes flicker from it to the guards walking on the other side of the factory. The dog's hackles are raised as it snarls, showing its teeth. You know that if it barks, or alerts the guards in any way, you’ll both be caught. John shushes it and slowly starts to roll the wagon away, quietly cueing the horses onward. The dog snarls again, snapping its jaws as you quietly ride the wagon away.
“What do we do? What if it alerts someone?” You whisper, heart racing. If the dog alerts a single guard, you’ll have every person in the facility shooting at you.
“I don’t know, drive like hell, I guess.” John offers as you watch the dog. John has the horses going at a nice trot towards the entrance, and sweat runs down your brow as the dog runs after the wagon. You’re just about to breach the front gate when it happens- when the bloodhound does what bloodhounds do. It bays, and it bays loud.
"What is it boy? What ya find?" Someone hollers, and a lantern flicks on in one of the tents. John flicks the reins over the horse's backs harshly and they pick up a canter towards the front gate.
“Shit!" You hiss as the dog continues, head tossed up in the air as guards start to come out and find the disturbance. One man comes out from a tent, still in pajamas with a rifle in hand. Your eyes widen as he stares directly at you.
“Right there! They’re takin’ a wagon!” The barely clothed man yells, and John curses as he smacks the horses with the reins again, and they take off. More guards and workers seem to come out and see you all escaping, and everyone readies their rifles. John steers the horses out the main gate just as bullets start to whiz past your head.
“Stop them!” Another guard calls out, “Get the damn law!”
Bullets ping against the wooden wheels of the wagon, and buzz through the air past your head. You lean your head down to protect yourself as you grab your carbine from around your shoulder, good thing you grabbed those bullets.
“Shoot somethin’!” John yells, maneuvering the horses along the roads in the direction of Dewberry Creek.
“Im tryin!” You yell back, loading your carbine before popping up and taking down two guards who were shooting from behind the fence. A few bullets ping against the side of the wagon, and you gasp, realizing how quickly it could go up in flames. You pop up from the bench again, and fire into the chests of three men who were running after the wagon.
“Watch the damn oil, you morons!” One of the guards yells to his men. You shoot down three more men before you have to reload again. John is getting you further from the oil fields, and the flashing of gunfire gets farther away until two riders come out after the wagon. You’re still filling up the magazine when they ride up on you, and John ducks, yelling something. A few more bullets whiz passed before you stand up and shoot both men down from their horses. You pant, ducking as three more riders gallop after you both. John has the horses running at a dizzying pace as you stand, taking down two men. You're extra careful not to shoot or hurt the rider's horses as you come up and shoot the last man.
“Is that the last of them?” John yells as you pant, wiping sweat from your brow and slumping back into your seat.
“Yeah, that's all.” You breathe heavily, tossing your carbine strap back over your shoulder. You whistle, and turn around to watch for Athena. John does the same, and luckily after a few minutes, both come running behind the wagon.
“Where we takin’ this again? I know you said the creek, but specifically?” You ask, taking your hat off and setting it in your lap to untie your braid. You pull the cloth tie out, running your fingers through the waves that are now down your back.
“We’re droppin’ it near this torn down house. I’ll leave the horses go and we'll come back for it when the train comes through.” John explains, and you nod.
It’s a bit of a ride, especially with the pace you go at. The horses are exhausted and scared from the shootout, so John doesn’t push them past a trot. It's nice to just relax in the passenger seat, and you focus on the humming of bugs and frogs while your heartbeat settles. It's a cloudy night, the kind where a cold fog settles over the place, but you don't mind. It's still beautiful. The moon pokes through the fog in a hazy glow, offering some light for John to lead you to Dewberry Creek. He winds the wagons down the open hills until you reach a small trail along a big dried up creek bed.
"Guess the creek ain't fairin' so well." You point out, watching as coyotes yip and run through the dried up creek.
"Guess not." John offers, pulling the wagons toward a structure. It looks like a little house that burned down. The foundation is intact, along with the fireplace and support beams, but the rest has burned away.
"We pull them off right here." John says, turning the horses to walk in between the house and a patch of trees. He starts to slow them down, and you hop from the wagon before it stops. Immediately you jog around the backside to check the cargo.
"Shit, John! Shit!" You hiss, taking in the oil wagon that is riddled with random bullet holes. There's about five or six, and no more oil leaks from them. You knock on the side of the wagon as John jumps down, groaning when the wagon sounds hollow.
"All the oils' gone." You sigh, rubbing your face as John paces around the backside of the wagon. Athena grows antsy from the upset, and she stomps and rears lightly.
"Now what the hell do we do?" You ask angrily, calling Athena over to comfort her. You hand her an oatcake to munch on and stroke her neck as John comes up with a plan. Athena's gentle nickers calm you down, and you take a deep breath as she leans into your hand. John is standing back from the wagon, hands on his hips as he thinks it over.
"It'll work just the same. The conductor won't know if it's full or not." John says, biting his cheek and you sigh.
"We can't just go get another one." John huffs, "That oil factory is on high alert now."
"You're sure it'll work?" You ask, stepping towards him with raised eyebrows.
"It'll work." He reassures you. You nod, sighing and waking towards the front of the wagon where the two white shire horses are hooked up. John does the same on the other side, and you both slice the leather harness straps, freeing the horses.
"When's it comin' through?" You ask, patting the shire horse to run off.
"Tomorrow night." John says, and your stomach aches at the thought. Only twenty four hours until your first train job.
Athena and Old Boy are grazing next to each other just a short walk away from the wagon, and you and John silently walk towards them, sheathing your knives and watching as the pair of white shire horses run up over the hill, bucking and whinnying.
"You ever rob a train before?" John asks, looking over at your anxious expression. You shake your head, coming up to Athena.
"No, afraid not. Just drunken idiots usually." You chuckle, and John smiles.
"Y'know I'm glad it was Arthur's watch you stole, and not mine back in Tumbleweed. I probably never would have noticed, and you'd still be runnin' all over hell in the west." John chuckles, and you smile at the memory, mounting onto Athena.
"Still can't believe he brought ya back like he did, but I'm glad for it." John says, climbing onto his stallion. Your eyebrows pull together lightly at his remark.
"Why's that?" You ask, cueing Athena into a canter with John behind you.
"Arthur, he ain't never brought someone back to camp before you, and he throws a big fuss when someone new comes in. He gets all pissed and leaves for a few days. He says it's 'easier to lie low with less people.' Musta seen somethin' in you, though." John hollers up to you, and your features soften. You wonder why Arthur chose differently for you, why he brought you back to camp.
"He's different with you." John says, galloping alongside you, and you have to push Athena further ahead to hide the blush on your cheeks. You want to quip something back, but you come up short because you know he's right. You've heard the same testament from each of the girls, Hosea, and Arthur himself.
It grows quiet as you gallop through The Heartlands, avoiding the roads and any lingering lawmen. It's late, near midnight when you finally get close to camp. You can hear the cheers and laughter from the road, and you smile back at John.
"Guess they found him." You chuckle, trotting Athena under the fallen tree into camp. When you breach the trees, coming into the little opening, the sight has you laughing. Camp is lighter than it's been in a while. Sean is standing on a crate giving some grand speech with everyone gathered around, and by the sound of it he's already drunk. You hitch Athena, and John nudges your elbow.
"Reckon I'm gonna go be with my family. Thanks for your help." John pats your back before walking off towards the camp. You smile, taking off the straps of Athena's saddle and placing it over the hitching post before walking towards the crowd.
"Get a load of this bastard." Arthur huffs, walking up beside you with two whiskeys in hand, gesturing to Sean. He hands you a drink, and you smile, glad to be home.
"Found him strung up in a damn tree surrounded by bounty hunters."
"A-and I owe my life to old English over 'tere!" Sean points to Arthur, "Yep, 'tats right! Old grumpy Arthur Morgan! Come to save me, ya did! You're my brother, ya arsehole!" Sean laughs heartily, jumping down from the crate and approaching the two of you.
"Miss!" Sean calls out to you, and Arthur chuckles, sipping his drink. Sean comes to you with a big toothless grin, a contagious one, and wraps you in a hug.
"Ah, I've already got the gossip from Ms. Jones, callin ya Star now, eh?" Sean asks, letting you go before nudging you with his elbow, "It's fittin! Y'know they say you twose are tied together like glue!" Sean winks at you lightly, nudging you and gesturing to Arthur.
"I know a couple good spots for a shag if you two need a getaway. N' I know an Irishman if you get tired a' this ol'-" Sean starts, pointing to Arthur, but Arthur has had enough.
"Would you please shut up?" Arthur bites, hand pulling away from the bridge of his nose as you giggle. Sean puts his hands up in mock surrender.
"I was just teasin'! Only pullin' yer leg!" Sean chuckles, tipping his hat to you before backing away and rejoining the crowd.
"I did not miss that kid." Arthur sighs, leading you towards the campfire where Javier sits, playing a tune. Everyone is in good spirits, especially as Hosea enters with Dutch and two huge, full cases of alcohol, announcing the return party.
"Yes you did." You tell Arthur, smirking as he sits down on the wolf pelt covered log. You sit down right next to him, closer than what's expected, but you're growing used to the proximity, finding comfort in it even. Sean is talking loudly to the girls as everyone gathers around the crates of hooch. The bottles pass around quickly as Javier picks up a new tune. It's one that everyone knows, and you smile.
"Cielito Lindo." You remark with a chuckle as Javier picks up the rhythm on his guitar. More people gather around the fire. Dutch, John, the girls, Uncle, Lenny, even Abigail and Jack join in as Javier starts to play. Jack sits on John's lap, nestled right next to Abigail, and you smile at them.
"¡Ay, ay, ay, ay! ¡Canta y no llores!" Everyone hollers out, not sure of the lyrics or their meaning, but enjoying the energetic song. Even Arthur sings along, and you giggle at his steadily behind, off key tune.
"¡Porque cantando se alegran, Cielito lindo, los corazones!" Javier sings out, passionately stringing the guitar as a few people clap along and laugh. The smile on your face is brighter than it's been in a while as you watch the weight lift off of the gang's shoulders. Arthur is smiling, and for that you are very grateful. You'd do anything to see him like this more often, carefree and happy. Javier continues the song verse, and everyone claps along until the chorus comes.
"¡Ay, ay, ay, ay! ¡Canta y no llores!" Everyone calls out again, and you hold your drink up a little as you sing it. Javier continues the song, and you chuckle as Jack pulls Abigail up from her seat to dance with him. He spins around and hops with very little rhythm, just having fun. Arthur chuckles beside you, eyes bright as they lay upon the same scene.
"You want another drink?" Arthur asks, noticing that your first is nearly gone. You shake your head.
"No thanks, think I'm cuttin' myself off for the night." You say, handing the bottle over for him to finish.
"I'm surprised you drank at all after that mess in Valentine." Arthur chuckles as Javier sings out the song's verse.
"I only had one. Don't plan on bein' that sick ever again, and we got one hell of a job to do tomorrow." You whisper, mind lingering on the train job. You'd like to drink, just to forget about it, but heading into it with a foggy mind is the opposite of what you need. Arthur sighs, digging the heel of his boot into the dirt.
"We do." He remarks, eyes flickering up to Dutch. Arthur can't understand why Dutch is pushing this job right now with the Pinkertons so close. But he trusts Dutch, and knows he'll lead them out of it. You're not so sure. Dutch is watching you from across camp, a snake-like glint in his eye. You can see the way he wants to use you, to play you like his chess piece and defeat some great power. It's useless, it's ridiculous. An outlaw runs from the law, but Dutch is challenging it, intentionally aggravating it. It's a dangerous game.
"I got a bad feeling about this job, Arthur." You bring up that gut feeling again, and you know you're right. You don't trust this job, and something is going to go wrong.
"I know you do… You and John get that wagon today?" Arthur asks as Javier picks up a different song on his guitar.
"We got the wagon just fine, but it's empty. We were caught red handed and they shot it to hell, all the oil leaked out." You sigh, embarrassed to admit the failure to Arthur, "John says it'll work just fine though, the conductor won't know if it's empty or not." You add as Arthur curses.
"Enough about that, why don't we just enjoy the party?" You ask, wanting to talk about anything other than the train job and the damn empty wagon. Arthur taps your knee with his knuckles.
"Sure." He says, offering you a small smile and you release a breath. Javier is playing a new song now, one you don't recognize, but it's a joyful tune, light and happy.
"Arthur!" Marybeth calls from across the fire, giggling and trodding over towards you both with a big, bright smile.
"Yes, Miss Gaskill?" Arthur asks as Marybeth comes forward and grabs one of his hands.
"Dance with me?" She asks, leaning back in an attempt to pull him from his seat. He chuckles, looking over to you for a moment with a rosy blush on his cheeks.
"Oh, I think I'll sit this one out-" Arthur starts, but you shove him upwards by his shoulder, laughing.
"Go on!" You encourage, shooing them with your hands. Marybeth giggles as she pulls Arthur away, and he turns around to shoot you a glare, with pink cheeks. You chuckle, looking after them as she takes him away from the fire. She pulls him just near the back of Dutch's tent, beside the poker table. He takes her hand, standing awkwardly far from her as the other rests on her waist. You can't help but snort as he starts to dance.
He's awful. Truly the man can't dance, but it's just another quirk that you love about him. He swings side to side with her, arms loosely flinging about, and even though it looks ridiculous they both have huge smiles. A few others have joined, and now Dutch spins Molly around eloquently, and Karen and Sean cling to each other, drunk as ever. Your eyebrows pop up in surprise at the two of them. You had only seen Sean in passing before Blackwater, but Karen had never mentioned they were together.
Your eyes flicker back to Arthur and Marybeth. They still dance merrily, but Marybeth seems to be scolding Arthur over something, arguing with him. Your eyebrows pull together as he huffs, bickering with her like a sibling would. Javier's song crescendos to an end, and as the claps die down, he starts a new one. You recognize it immediately, Ángel de Amor. It's a slower paced song, a sweet and romantic one. People join their own conversations as the song begins, leaving Javier to quietly carry the tune on his own. As it begins, Marybeth and Arthur's argument seems to come to a head as Marybeth gives him one final scold, and then walks away from him with a big smile. Confused, your eyebrows pull together as Arthur returns to you, but he doesn't sit down. He stands in front of you, extending his right hand down to yours.
"Dance wit' me?" He asks, and you chuckle.
"I don't know, you gonna trip me?" You ask, smiling up at him. The nervousness breaks away as he chuckles.
"Not tonight." He says, and you take his hand, letting him pull you to your feet.
"C'mon." He whispers, leading you past the campfire towards the front of his tent, far enough away from the campfire for some privacy.
Arthur pulls you into the same goofy dance as he did with Marybeth, and you smile brightly. Arthur's sure that your smile could outshine the stars, evoking that joy from you is one of the better things he's done in his life, something he wants to keep doing.
"¿Quién te cortó las alas, mi ángel? ¿Quién te arranco los sueños hoy?" Javier sings softly as Arthur dances with you.
"Y'know, I'm sorry to say this Arthur, but you can't dance for shit." You chuckle, glancing down at his feet that move with very little rhythm.
"Oh I can. I'm just havin' fun. You shoulda seen me in my ballroom days." Arthur quips, and you laugh. You're sure he's joking, how Arthur could willingly be put in a ballroom is beyond you, it's surely a joke. Arthur raises an eyebrow at your laugh, wondering if you're seriously doubting him.
"You weren't never in a ballr-" You start, but are cut off with your own gasp as Arthur pulls you tightly against him. His hand snakes to your waist, his other clasps your hand tightly as he stands up straight and tall with a raised eyebrow. His body is stiff, but relaxed all the like, he's collected in his movements, experienced, as he leans you down, dipping you. Your eyes are wide in shock, as he holds you in the dip with a cocky smirk. Your heart rate pounds with him pulled so tightly against you, your neck exposed and hair cascading down as he bends you backwards. Then he brings you back up, chuckling.
"You continue to surprise me more and more every day, Arthur." You chuckle, still in disbelief, "Where in the hell did you learn that?" You ask, heart beat returning to normal as he pulls you against him again, swaying you in a very simple slow dance.
"Had to take lessons once when I was younger. Didn't care for it at all, but I was an idiot back then." Arthur says, and you hum, wondering if these fancy dancing lessons have anything to do with the letter in his tent.
"Ángel, Ángel, ángel de amor. No te abandones." Javier continues the song as Arthur pulls you a little closer to him, hand warm on your waist.
Your cheeks flush, hidden away in his chest as Arthur sways with you on the grass. A few eyes linger on you both, but Arthur turns your back to them so you never know. He's enjoying the moment. You haven't left yet, haven't walked away with blushed cheeks or made an excuse as to why you can't dance with him, and that has to count for something he's sure.
It grows quiet between the two of you as you rest your head against his shoulder and sway with him. Soon your arm grows tired, so Arthur snakes both of his around your waist and you place yours on his chest. It's incredibly vulnerable for you to be like this, but you trust Arthur. He hasn't pushed you. Abigail nudges John across the camp, nodding her head to you, and a few more eyes linger on you both. Arthur ignores them, keeping you in a position so that you can't even see the nosey stares.
"You look beautiful." Arthur whispers, eyes looking down at you, watching as the wind tousles your hair and your dark red shirt brings out your complexion beautifully. Your eyes sparkle up at him, but you blush and hide them away in his shoulder as he sways you to the music.
"Arthur, stop." You chastise, cheeks red as you hide them. You're a bit upset that he's ruined the mood, taken your mind from simple dancing to the conundrum of your heart. He hums deeply, nodding his head.
"You ain't ready yet, I know… I'll wait 'til you are. For you, I will." Arthur whispers, and tears begin to pool in your eyes, "And if you decide you don't want any a' this, that's okay too. I'm still your best friend." Arthur whispers, and tears run down your face silently, soaking into his dark shirt.
"I'll dance with you for real one day, somewhere nice." Arthur whispers, and you look up to his green eyes. They soften when they see the tears falling from your own. You're thinking of a proper response when Arthur speaks up for you.
"S'okay. You don't gotta say anything." Arthur whispers, thumb wiping away the tears from your cheek. You sniffle, hands clinging to the lapels of his shirt as the music continues on for a bit longer.
"Yo no siento el que me hayas querido. Yo no siento el que me hayas amado." Javier sings, strumming his guitar.
Arthur's heart aches, holding you like this, swaying with you and knowing you won't allow yourself to open up. He places his chin atop your head, inhaling deeply before letting the breath go with his worries. You're here now, that's all he can ask for.
Your heart aches just the same. It's torn in two, both sides fighting for different things. One is fighting for what you know: independence, freedom, and solitude in the west without being held down by a gang. And the other is fighting for what you want: family and friendships, the safety of numbers, purpose and most of all him.
You sigh, squeezing your eyes shut while blocking the thoughts out, letting yourself enjoy the moment.
"I'm sorry, Arthur." You whisper, and he leans back, unsure if he's heard you right.
"What on earth are you apologizin' for?" He asks as Javier's song comes to a bittersweet end.
"Me… us." You whisper, gesturing to him and yourself. You're a mess, unable to get your feelings in order, unable to figure out what you want, and to tell him. You feel awful, dragging him along without ever fully opening up to him but it's so hard.
Arthur takes your hands in his own, and you look up to his eyes.
"Cut that out. Don't you apologize to me, ya hear? Not for this." Arthur says, no room for argument and you nod.
"Now c'mon. Plenty of people waitin' for us at the fire." Arthur says, pulling you by the hand towards the camp. You pass by John's tent, feeling a little better.
With a small smile on your lips, you walk on with him. That is until you hear a shuffling from John's tent, and a groan. You stop dead in your tracks, looking up to where John and Abigail sit next to Jack by the fire. If they're at the campfire… who's in their tent?
"C'mere ya little minx!" Sean chuckles from inside the tent. Your jaw drops, and your hand falls slack from Arthur's. He turns at your reaction, catching the same scene.
"Isn't this John's tent?" Karen asks, and you hear the ripping of buttons immediately. You look at Arthur with wide eyes, and a slack jaw, chuckling in horror.
"Eh, it's not like he's usin' it anyways!" Fabric hits the floor as you and Arthur stare at the closed tent in shock, "Ah, you're beautiful Karen Jones, beautiful, I love ya! And I love these too!" Sean chuckles and your cheeks burn red.
"Oh." Karen whispers, disappointed in something as you start to laugh.
"Meet Macguire junior!" Sean hollers, and immediately Arthur clasps his hand over your mouth to quiet the loud laughter that was about to fall from it.
"Is- is that it?" Karen asks, and you're nearly wheezing as Arthur keeps his hand over your mouth, chuckling himself until you're out of earshot from their tent.
"Oh my god." You laugh until tears form in your eyes, and Arthur is laughing as well. You've managed to escape in front of Arthur's tent to avoid the show those two are putting on. Once your laughter dies down, you wipe your eyes, moving them to the campfire once more.
Abigail has taken Jack into her lean-to next to Strauss's wagon to lie down for the night, and some of the girls along with Dutch and Molly have retired for bed.
"You comin' back to the fire?" Arthur asks, following your gaze. You look up to him, then to the festivities, biting your cheek.
"I think I'm gonna go to bed, actually." You whisper, feeling bad for bailing so soon. You're exhausted from the oil wagon today, and you want to be well rested for tomorrow. Arthur’s face falls a bit as he glances at the party behind him, then to his pocket watch.
"So soon?" Arthur asks, looking a little disappointed.
"I'm sorry Arthur, it's just with the train tomorrow… I want to be well rested with a clear head." You whisper.
"I understand." He whispers, it's past one in the morning, and he knows you're tired, "I reckon I'll stay up for a bit yet, keep these boys in line… Get some sleep, Star." Arthur whispers, coming forward to gently chastise you, tapping your temple, "and stop worryin' about the train. It'll go just fine." He offers with a smile before backing away.
"Night Arthur." You mumble, attempting to follow his instructions and release your anxieties.
"G'night, Star."
— — — —
The next morning, you wake up earlier than expected. You don't know what time it is, still haven't replaced Arthur's pocket watch from where it was left behind in Blackwater. But it's quiet enough for you to know that no one else is up. You stretch in bed, enjoying the feel as your achy joints pop. You flex your ankle, noticing that the ache has subsided from your less than stellar landing yesterday, and then you're getting up.
You pull on a dark green overshirt, one of your favorites, a black pair of jeans that button up the whole way, and a little white neckerchief, tied in the front. It's a cute outfit, and you hum, checking yourself over before re braiding your hair and topping it with your black hat. Then you're on the move, in search of some coffee.
You find that you were wrong, you're not the only one up. You chuckle as Jack whizzes up to you, more excited than you've ever seen.
"Aunt Star!" He jumps excitedly, taking your hand and pointing to the hitching posts, "look!" He shouts, giggling.
Your eyebrows knit together at the sight of Kieran taking on the role of the camp farrier. He has a very grumpy Balius with him, and he's working on pulling the nails from the shire's massive shoe.
"Kieren's shoin' the horses…? You ask, confused as to why Jack's so excited, then a chuckle sounds out from your right. Arthur is leaning over his shaving station, face partially covered in shaving cream as he trims his mustache and beard with a barber's blade. You smile at the sight, something you've not seen him do before. Of course he shaves with an incredible amount of detail and care, just like everything else he does.
"Well…" Arthur taps the blade against his pail of water before returning it to his cheek, "when Kieran's done, little Jack here will have four new shoes for playin' horseshoes' with everyone. We haven't been able to play in a long while, not since before you joined us." Arthur explains, and you smile at the idea.
"Well then I can't wait!" You say, rubbing some dirt off of Jack's cheek before he runs off, on his way to tell his very hungover daddy about the ordeal.
"You're good with him. He really seems to care about you." Arthur remarks and you smile.
"Ah, it's nothin'. He's a good kid." You mumble, remembering your earlier task of needing coffee, and you spot the percolator from across camp near Pearson's stew pot. You wonder if it's even full, with so few of the gang members awake.
"I'm gonna go make some coffee, want some?" You ask, but Arthur stops you.
"Already made ya some. It's sittin on my table, should still be hot." He says, wiping the extra cream from his face with a damp towel.
"On the ball this morning, are we?" You ask, chuckling as you move inside his tent to find a steaming tin cup of coffee. You gratefully accept the bitter coffee, enjoying the way the cup warms your hands and the caffeine wakes your mind.
"Well I need a favor." He asks, turning towards you, "Ride with me?"
You raise an eyebrow at him, seeing that he's bribed you, but you nod anyway.
"Sure, where to?" You ask as he comes around the side of his tent, leading you to the large map plastered to the side of his wagon.
"Think right here is a good spot." He taps the map right over a little marshy field labeled Heartland Overflow.
"Why are we goin' all the way out there?" You ask, eyeing over the map. The marsh is near a spot marked Emerald Ranch, a place you haven't heard of before.
"There's a feller nearby that runs a fence. I managed to steal some stuff from the camp where they had Sean, reckon I'll head down and sell it off. Then I figure me n' you can spend the mornin' there. I know you're worried about this train, we can just rest away from camp till it's time." Arthur explains, pulling out his hunting knife to sharpen the blade as he does.
"Okay, that sounds nice." You smile, releasing a breath before taking a sip from your coffee, "Should I take my stuff for the train or will we be back?" You ask, gesturing to your tent.
He follows your gaze, thinking for a moment.
"Ya better take it, I don't know how long we'll be out." He mumbles, and you nod before walking back towards your tent. Amidst your anxieties, you had packed everything you might need for the train: your guns, mask, canned goods in case you get stuck away from camp, extra ammo and the shotgun you'd found at Six Point cabin. Looking over your bed and nightstand just to make sure you haven't missed something, you back out of the tent.
"Kieran done with Balius?" You ask, keeping your voice quiet as to not wake up the many sleeping, hungover gang members.
"Looks to be just about." Arthur says, nodding to where Kieran drops Balius's back hoof to the ground, giving him a pat.
"C'mon then. I'll lead the way." He adds.
You both take your time tacking up the horses. For once, there's no rush to be anywhere. You brush Athena's golden coat thoroughly, petting her and sneaking her treats while Arthur does the same for his stallion. You ease the saddle on her, tightening the cinches just enough before mounting up.
"Ready?" You ask, looking down to Arthur with a chuckle as he is just putting Balius's bridle on.
"Just a minute." He says, rather grumpily. And you wait for him, loosening your reins so that Athena can graze while he clambers up onto his massive horse. Once he's up, he nods for you to follow him out of camp. It's a decently long ride. Emerald Ranch is pretty far out there, but it's close to Dewberry Creek, so at least you won't be far from the train come dark. You focus on the scenery, watching the way the landscape changes the further you ride on. As you get closer, the jutting cliffs turn to grassy plains, and bison cause the ground to shake as they thunder across the fields.
"Are we close?" You holler up to Arthur. Your back is a little sore from the long ride, and you slip your feet out of the stirrups to give your legs rest.
"Sure… Why? You feelin alright?" Arthur turns in his saddle, glancing over your form to check. Really you don't feel alright. You didn't sleep much last night, truthfully you're not sure how Arthur is awake because he slept less than you. You're still not able to shake your nerves either.
"Yeah, just tired is all." You semi lie, but Arthur isn't fooled.
"I'll take you to the Overflow first. You can set us up a proper picnic while I run this stuff down to the fence. Sound good?" Arthur asks, turning Balius off the main road.
"Yeah. You brought a picnic?" You smile, noticing that Arthur's saddlebags are bulkier than usual. You should have noticed earlier that they're stuffed to the brim.
"I did. Nothin' fancy but I figured you might get hungry while we're out here." Arthur answers, and you chuckle, wondering what treats he's packed for you. You trot through the grass, coming upon a little collection of grassy ponds. This must be Heartland Overflow. It's beautiful, and wildlife runs about, scattering at the sound of the horse's hooves.
"Why don't you take my bag n' find us a nice spot?" Arthur asks as you ride up alongside Balius. He turns in his saddle, untying the knots that hold his saddle bag on before slumping it over Athena's croup.
"Okay. Don't take too long or I'm gonna be havin' this all for myself." You admit, chuckling as you turn Athena away, separating from Arthur.
Arthur shakes his head with a smile before pushing Balius into a canter towards a green-roofed barn in the distance. Once he's down the other side of the hill and you can't see him any longer, you turn to your surroundings.
Across the pond is a large weeping willow. It provides a perfect amount of shade, and makes a beautiful spot for the morning. You kiss to Athena, urging her to walk through the ankle deep water toward the other side. Water splashes up and soaks onto your boots as Athena trots through it, enjoying the coolness on her legs. Once you're on the other side, under the weeping willow, you slide down from your mare. You don't bother to hitch her. She trusts you enough to come when you call, and you want her to enjoy the grassy fields while she can. You take the heavy saddle bag and toss it to the ground under the willow before sitting on your knees to go through it.
First you take out a blanket, it's a big blue one, and you stand to spread it out on the grass. The wind works to your advantage as you sprawl it out, making a perfect cushion for you both to sit on. Then, seated on the blanket, you pull out two cans of peaches, two bread rolls, a can of strawberries, two slices of beef jerky, and a chocolate bar. You eye the food hungrily, laying it out nice for when Arthur comes back. Then, just to double check, you reach back into the bag. Your fingers brush against an unfamiliar smooth texture, and your eyebrows pull together as you grip it, taking it out.
Immediately your eyes go wide as, from the bag, you bring out Arthur's journal. You hold the precious book in your lap, looking down to the heavily used pages before looking up at the ridge.
You shouldn't… but Arthur won't be back for some time and you really want to know what he's written. You've only seen the contents of his journal once, back when he showed you in Horseshoe.
Releasing a breath, you curse yourself, deciding just to flip to one page and then put it back. You run your thumb across the pages, flipping to one of the more recent entries. Immediately you smile, chuckling as your eyes run across the page briefly. It's a drawing of you and Lenny. He's leaning on the bar, drinking a beer and you're dancing in front of the pianist. Arthur had managed to capture the moment perfectly, as if he had paused time and drawn it. You scan down your smiling face, looking back to you in the form of Arthur's sketching. Even in the drawing you can see the drunken haze in your eyes, the freedom as you danced to the piano to your heart's content.
Then your eyes flicker to the other side of the page where a neatly written entry is scribbled diagonally on the paper.
In some ways I hope I never forget this night. In others, I wish to wipe it from my mind entirely. It seems that alcohol loosened Star's lips, and I guess it loosened mine too. I just hope I don't come to regret the things I said, the things I remember at least.
You look up from the journal, jaw slack as you attempt to remember what happened that night. What had you said? What had Arthur said?
You swallow thickly, looking down to the journal with some worry before flipping to the next page.
Mary sent me a letter. Said she's in town and heard talk of us in Valentine. She wants to see me, said she misses what we had. I used to. I used to miss her a lot, but I reckon that's all old business now. I think I've finally put Mary in the past, moved on after all these goddamn years. I got some hope now, something good for once.
You look up from the journal with your jaw open again. His journal has left you with more questions than answers, and you huff. Mary clearly meant something to Arthur at one point, perhaps an old fling? But the girls knew of her, so she had to mean something more.
With a newfound sour mood, you tuck Arthur's journal back into his bag. Is it jealousy you feel? Or anger? You're not sure, but without having met her, Mary manages to get under your skin. You wonder if she's pretty, and if she has the money to wear nice dresses and makeup. Then you sigh, frustrated. Even though his journal is stuffed back into his bag, you can feel its leather cover burning into your skin, bugging you.
Hooves sound out from the ridge line, and you look up to see Arthur appear over the hill. He's cantering down towards you, satchel lighter now that he's pawned off some items. Even though you're glad he's back, you can't help the annoyed curiosity that bubbles up in your stomach.
Oblivious, Arthur rides up to the blanket before dismounting.
"Good spot." He says, sending Balius off after grabbing a flask from his satchel, "Turns out old Seamus sells too." Arthur chuckles, tossing the moonshine flask down onto the blanket by your legs.
Attempting to crack a smile, you take the flask and unscrew the lid. Arthur rests down on the blanket beside you, sitting just a few inches from you. Once the lid is undone, you take a swig of the alcohol. It burns, more so than anything you've ever drank, and you cough, throat raw from the stuff.
"Jesus." You cough, handing the flask back to Arthur.
"Moonshine. Nasty stuff." Arthur jokes, taking a drink from the same flask. He doesn't seem to mind it, only groaning once it's down. Arthur sees the distant look on your face, he notices that you haven't touched any of the food laid out either.
"You okay?" Arthur asks, a little crease in between his eyebrows. You look upset, and Arthur hopes that you're not worrying about the train.
"Who's Mary?" You blurt out, not even realizing you've actually said it out loud until Arthur's face draws up.
"What?" Arthur asks, looking almost offended, and very surprised.
"I asked you, who's Mary?" You repeat, looking up to Arthur. Your tone is irritated, and you realize that you're ruining the picnic, but you can't bring yourself to stop. You're mad, mad because Arthur has managed to keep this from you, and apparently you're the only one in the damn gang that doesn't know about her.
"How do you even know about Mary?" Arthur scoffs, eyes squinted as he leans back from you.
"Jesus, I didn't realize she was a secret. I guess I just wanna know why she's callin' you out to her house all the sudden when I haven't even heard of her before." You bite.
Arthur's demeanor changes then, shifting to the angry, threatening man that you've only seen a handful of times in action. Part of you wants to shy away, but you push your shoulders back and meet him head on with the same stubborn aggression.
"Did you read my damn mail?" Arthur hisses, glancing at you, and then down to the bag at your side. Everything seems to click in his head then, and he huffs humorlessly.
"No. No you read my goddamn journal, didn't you? Just couldn't keep your nosey eyes off them pages huh?" He bites, picking up the bag just to toss it at your feet. The contents spill out in your lap, and his open journal falls out alongside the candies he had brought for you, the yellow ones.
"Y'know I hope you read it all. I hope you read every damn page, cause then you won't have to ask anymore questions. We wouldn't be playin this damn game…" Arthur hisses, pacing as he begins to berate you. "Why do you have the right to ask me about Mary when you haven't told me shit about your past? You can't even talk to me. You can't open up at all, closed off like a damn bottle, but you have no problem pryin' into everybody else's lives!" He growls, waiting for you to bite back.
On the ground, feeling like a fool, your lip trembles. You know he's right. He's hit the nail right on the head with his assumption, but it hurts nonetheless. You've stepped too far, you know, but it doesn't stop Arthur from overstepping too.
"Heard you was pryin' into John's business too. God- you're a hypocrite. Did you think at all about your inability to handle your own shit before you went and did that?" Arthur fumes, and you bring your knees up to your chin. Arthur is waiting for your retort, for your comeback. He knows it'll come, but with his back to you, waiting, it doesn't. You always have a retort, and your silence is louder than any insult you could have thrown back at him. When he turns back towards you, already realizing he's crossed a boundary, he sees the tear track running down your cheek.
"Don't." You whisper, sniffling back the tears that fall so often now, "I can take this from anyone but you." You whimper, head falling to your knees.
When Arthur's eyes land upon you he doesn't know what to do. You look so small, crumpled up on the ground, a mess. He wants to argue with you, to be mad about the journal, but at the same time he wants to comfort you. He knows what you're battling right now, and he knows he shouldn't have brought it up. Feeling like an ass, Arthur slumps to the ground at your side again. He lays back against the blanket, looking up at the sky before sighing.
"Mary was my fiancé. Long time ago. Ain't talked to her in years." Arthur admits, and you peek up from your knees, wondering what sparked the change in his tone.
"Now that's all I'm giving you until you tell me somethin too. But for now, eat somethin. We gotta get movin soon." Arthur says, coldly.
— — — —
It's nearly dark. There's just enough light for you to make the trip over to Dewberry Creek. You lead the way silently, still not having said a word to Arthur since the argument. You don't know what to say. Apologies aren't exactly your strong suit. You're mad. Mad at Arthur, but mostly mad at yourself for ruining the day with your selfishness, your hypocrisy as Arthur put it.
You can hear Sean rambling as you approach the old building, and you trot Athena up to where the wagon is hidden.
"Why the hell are you here?" Arthur snaps at Sean, clearly still irritated from earlier. You've put him in a sour mood, one that everyone is going to have to deal with.
"Oi I’m just taggin along! Back for a day n’ already jumpin inta the action! My da always used to say that jumpin in was better than jumpin’ out! But I think he was talkin about gettin some arse!" Sean chuckles, not skipping a beat over Arthur's attitude.
"Oh, shut up." Charles groans, and at the sound of his voice you notice him leaning against one of the beams of the burned down house. John is already in the driver's side of the wagon, and Taima and Old Boy are hooked up to the front. You dismount, walking over to the wagon behind Arthur.
"Look at us! Four strong shootin men, and a lady!" Sean chuckles, climbing up on the wagon beside John who rolls his eyes.
"Shouldn't we be going over the plan?" Charles points out, climbing onto the side of the wagon to hang on, just as you and Arthur do on the other side. The wagon begins to roll out of the trees as John smacks the reins over the horse's backs.
"We roll the wagon over the tracks and leave the horses go." John explains, "They'll see the oil and stop. It's easy."
Sean turns in his seat, looking over the wagon before turning back to John.
"Yeah but t'eres no oil in the wagon." Sean points out, and collectively everyone else rolls their eyes.
"Well the conductor don't know that, so it don't matter!" John bites, irritated with everyone's doubts and questions.
"I don't like it…" You whisper, gripping onto the metal bars of the wagon as it rolls down the road, inching closer towards the train tracks.
"We ain't got much of a choice." John replies. Once the plan is set, Arthur begins ordering people around, crafting a more detailed plan for the job.
"As soon as she stops, board her. Charles, deal with the conductor and the front security. John take the passengers. Sean and Star, as soon as she slows, head to the baggage car." He orders, and you roll your eyes at the assignment he's stuck you with.
"And what are you gonna do?" Charles asks.
"I'm gonna make sure she slows."
John pulls the wagon forward, slowing the horses to a stop once the oil wagon is situated over the tracks. You jump down as John and Arthur begin untying the horses from the front, sending them away into the woods.
"Is everyone good with the plan?" Arthur hollers, and you look around, realizing that this is happening. It's inescapable now, and you'll have to deal with the anxiety in your chest.
"Yeah, we're good." Charles answers, and you nod your head, eyes fixed on the bed in the railroad tracks where the train will be approaching shortly.
"Alright everyone get in the woods!" Arthur orders, pulling his mask up over his nose before placing one of his boots on the iron track. Charles notices your hesitancy, and grips your arm to pull you towards the treeline.
"Hey, you alright?" Charles asks, pulling your neckerchief up over your nose as you've forgotten. You nod, a little too quick for his liking.
"Just nervous." You admit.
"Just stick with Sean. You'll be okay." Charles offers, squeezing your shoulder lightly. You nod, focusing your attention back on Arthur.
You feel the vibration of the train long before you see it coming. Arthur's boot shakes against the track, and once he feels it coming he climbs up on top of the oil wagon. You gasp, eyes going wide as he holds his carbine in front of him, in a threatening stance on top of the wagon. He looks like nothing short of a criminal up there, a cold hearted killer. He stands on the wagon with a threatening stance, symbolizing everything that the government wishes to destroy. Feet planted on either side of the oil barrel, it doesn't appear that Arthur will be giving the law a break any time soon. The sight of him standing up on that wagon is one you're sure you'll never forget. If you didn't know Arthur, you'd be terrified.
Nothing can be heard but uneven, anxious breathing as the train comes around the corner. it's far off, too far for the conductor to see Arthur, but once the bright white headlight peeks around the bend your breath hitches in your throat.
Arthur cocks his repeater, and you watch as the train comes closer. You expect the train to blow its whistle, for the conductor to do something to warm off Arthur, but he doesn't. Your eyebrows draw together as the train continues to barrel forward, unbothered by the obstruction ahead.
"Why ain't it slowin'?" You ask, breath uneven as your heart rate picks up speed.
No one responds, watching as it continues forward. Even Arthur seems to lose his composure, stance faltering as the train continues on. It's getting closer to the wagon, and you're not sure if it'll have time to stop before it crashes.
"There's still time. Hold on." Sean says, eyes flickering up to the rapidly approaching train.
"John?! Why ain't it stoppin?!" You beg, looking frantically between Arthur and the train. Charles pulls out a pair of binoculars, looking through them to the engine car.
"Shit! He's dead or he's asleep, but either way the train isn't stopping." Charles says, stuffing his binoculars back as anxiety pangs in your chest. The train is too close now, it can't stop in time even if the conductor were to wake up.
"ARTHUR JUMP!" John screams as all four of you jog out of the woods. Arthur glances between the group of you and the train, unable to hear over the rumbling and screeching.
"JUMP!" You plead, screaming. Arthur glances at the train once more, and getting the message he jumps as far out as he can. He hits the ground hard, rolling down the slope before he stops. It's only seconds later that the train smashes into the oil wagon. You thank god it's empty, and there's no explosion, but the metallic screech hurts your ears as the train pushes the wagon over in a huge crash. Sparks fly as metal scrapes off metal, but the train carries on forward, pushing the oil wagon in front of it until itfalls off to the side.
"Why the hell didn't he stop?!" Arthur yells, whistling for Balius.
"The conductor is dead!" You yell, "Are we really still doin' this?"
Four horses come running up the hill towards you, and the boys mount up ahead of you.
"Yes! Now mount up, we can catch it before it gets to Rhodes!" John yells, and you leap onto Athena, urging her forward before you even put your feet in the stirrups. The chase is terrifying. It's hard to see in the dark, and you put full trust into Athena as she barrels forward after the train. Sean is the first to catch up, and he jumps from his horse onto the train's roof.
Your heart pounds in your ears as you run forward, watching as Charles, John and Arthur all jump onto the train.
"Star, cmon!" Arthur yells, and you try to breath as you stand in your saddle, barely able to balance. You jump as far as you can, hoping that you'll make it. The jump is terrifying, but worse is the pain as your body slams against the side of the train. Only your hands have made it to the top as you grip onto the roof, feet dangling down to the rapidly passing ground below. Then a hand grips yours, and pulls you up into the roof. You gasp, looking up to yours and Arthur's hands, muttering a small 'thanks' between trembling breaths.
"Plan stays the same. Charles, get this thing stopped!" Arthur orders, just as two armed guards climb up onto the roof.
"They're fixin' to rob the train!" One of the boys yells and starts shooting from his revolver. You unholster your own, balancing on the quick moving train as you fire twice into the man's chest. The second man breaches the top, and Sean takes him down with a headshot. The train makes you motion sick, and you have to bite down bile, forcing your eyes away from the ground.
"We're gettin' too damn close to the town!" John yells, firing into more men as they climb up onto the roof.
You whip around, looking for Charles to see if he's made progress in getting to the engine car. You don't see him on the roof, so you assume he's close.
"John! Get down there, me and Star will hold them off. Sean, get to the baggage car!" Arthur yells out. They follow his orders, jumping down to the train cars from behind you and Arthur.
"Why's there so many?" You yell over the noise as two more men fire toward you.
"I don't know, sure are a lot for an unguarded train- goddammit!" Arthur yells back.
You lose your balance as the train quickly starts to slow down. Sparks fly and metal screeches as the train begins to slow. You release a breath, reloading your revolver as more guards shoot at you from across the train cars. The train never stops, instead in one fluid movement it slows enough and then starts going backwards.
"Wait- wait, shit!" You yell as the train starts moving in reverse. Just as quickly as the train has stopped, it starts accelerating in the wrong direction, back towards Valentine.
"What the hell is happenin?" You scream back towards the engine car. You fire into one last guard, and then they stop coming up to the roof for now.
"We're goin' too fast!" You point out, losing your balance again as trees start to blur by, making you dizzy.
"Shit, I know. Just get to Sean, I'll see what's happenin' up front!" Arthur hollers, bracing himself as he jumps onto the next train car.
"Star?" Arthur yells, and you turn around, "Don't get hurt." You nod, and with that he turns, running on the rapidly reversing train towards the engine.
You try to calm down your breathing as you run across the tops of the train cars, jumping as far as you can between each one. Your heart pounds rapidly in your ears, and the train accelerating is nothing but a background noise in your head. Revolver in hand, eventually you make it to the baggage car.
"Sean you alive?" You yell, bracing yourself as you jump from the roof down onto the platform below. The land sends an ache through your knees, but you do land.
"Yeah makin out real good down here!" Sean hollers back as you enter the caboose.
"Why the hell are we in reverse?" Sean asks, stuffing a saddle bag full of cash and jewelry. You immediately get to helping him, ripping open the cupboards and stripping them of their content before shoving the precious items into Sean's bag.
"I got no idea. Arthur n Charles are dealin' with it." You respond, glancing out the window and gasping when you see that you're nearing Flatneck Station. You've crossed the state line back into New Hanover, and in less than five minutes you'll be crossing over Bard's Crossing, the infamously high railroad bridge.
"Oh my god, fuck." You curse, stuffing the bags even quicker. Shots ring out from the roof, and you gasp, neck snapping up.
"That's gotta be Arthur or Charles." You gasp. You look down the train cars to see John pistol whip a man for not giving up his money.
"Go help ‘em! I'm alright here for now!" Sean hollers, and you nod, running out of the car. Momentarily holstering your gun, you leap up onto the roof, pulling yourself up. Arthur is up there, shooting at a couple of men across the train as you run up to help him.
"You guys got the money?" He asks.
"Yeah! Why ain't we stopped?!" You yell, shooting at the men, and clipping one in the neck. He falls off the train, and you wince as his body cracks against the quickly passing ground. Just then, Charles comes running across the cars, jumping over the gaps towards you.
"Conductors dead! Doors locked and he fell on the reverse lever. I can't stop it." Charles explains, "We gotta go NOW, it's not stopping!" He yells, just as two more boys climb up onto the roof.
"Rot in hell you bastards!" One yells, and you go to reload your revolver, but it's empty. You curse, looking ahead to where the caboose is barreling towards the bridge.
A man climbs up from behind you, taking you by surprise as he knocks the gun from Arthur's hand. Arthur turns around and punches him right in the face, nose cracking as blood pours from his face.
"Get off the train! I got this bastard!" Arthur yells, and you hyperventilate, glancing between him and the bridge. Sean and John have already jumped, and you see them riding alongside the train with Athena, Taima and Balius. Charles jumps down, just as Arthur kicks the man off the side of the train. He hits the ground with a sickening crack, and Arthur turns to you, no longer asking.
"Star, go!" Arthur commands, and you gasp as another man comes up from the side of the train, pulling Arthur into a chokehold from behind.
"Get down here! We can't help him till you're out the way!" John screams up to you, and panicking, you leap. The jump is terrifying, and the land onto your saddle knocks the breath out of you. But then you're safe on Athena, barreling towards the cliffs edge where the bridge begins, waiting for Arthur to deal with the last guard.
"Does anyone have a shot on him?" Sean yells, gun aimed up at the man who is fighting Arthur. Arthur's body is bigger than the man, and at the angle you're at, it's impossible to kill him without killing Arthur. Arthur struggles, elbowing the man in the gut to break free from his chokehold.
"No!" John yells back.
"Arthur!" You scream, though futile, watching as the train gets closer to the bridge.
"I got this bastard." Arthur chokes out, coughing as he elbows the man enough to get away from his grip. You slide Athena into a stop to avoid running off a cliff as the train starts to go over the bridge. The wind howls in your ear from the elevation as you watch on in horror.
"What do we do!? John-" You whimper, feeling useless and helpless as Arthur punches the man, fists raised as they brawl atop the train.
"He'll be okay. He will. He'll get down on the other side and we'll run over and get him." John replies. All you can do is watch as the train accelerates across the bridge, and you've never been so afraid in your life. Arthur takes a punch in the gut, leaving him vulnerable.
"Does anyone have a shot!!?" Sean screams, gun raised. But Arthur is still in the way, and no one can help him, he's on his own.
Somehow the next moment happens in a lifetime, and a fraction of a second. Arthur takes a punch straight straight to the gut, and he doubles over, left vulnerable. The guard steadied himself, lifting his leg until the sole of his boot meets Arthur's stomach. The train is rolling right over the highest part of the bridge as the guard kicks out. Arthur stumbles, and the kick sends him falling over the side of the train.
All the air leaves your lungs, your eyes go wide, and everything stops as Arthur falls. You're frozen, watching as Arthur falls down past the bridge. It's a high drop, too high. Your eyes go wide as Arthur's arms stretch up, attempting to grasp onto something that isn't there as he plummets two hundred feet down to the lake below.
"No-" You breathe out, just barely a whisper as you stumble down from Athena, nearly falling from the saddle.
"Arthur!-" John gasps.
"NO!-" You scream, breaths coming in quick, uncontrollable pants as tears fill your eyes and fall out in thick rivulets. You stumble to the ledge of the bridge, on the tracks, gripping the fence so tight that your knuckles turn white.
The other three men are slack jawed, horrified. They all gasp, stunned beyond being capable to speak. When you look down, you see the rippling water where Arthur had landed, landed but not come back up.
"NO!!" You sob, unable to hold back your tears as you fall back, hands never leaving the fence. Your cries are shoulder shaking, and you can't bring yourself to care that you are sobbing in front of the other men.
"Get back to camp right now and don't get followed." John orders Charles and Sean, tears in his eyes that he quickly wipes away. They comply, silently nodding before turning their horses and galloping home, shell-shocked.
You're too stunned to notice what's going on around you, but your sobs have slowed, turned into aching, painful heaves as your nails dig into the fence, as if you holding on to it will pull Arthur back up to you.
"Star?" John whispers, so quiet from behind you. You shake your head, knowing what he's going to ask of you.
"Star, we gotta go. The law will be here soon." John tries to reason, fighting his own internal ache. You're not having it, not leaving, and John places his hands on your shoulders, begging you to come with him. You can't stop looking down at the rippling water, waiting for him to come back up, and tearing your eyes away when he doesn't, a vicious cycle.
"W-we can't leave him John. What if he- what if he's down there and he needs help?" You cry, lungs aching.
"I know. We won't. We won't leave him. But we can't help him if the law gets to us." He says, and you nod frantically, thinking over his idea.
He tries to pull you backwards, away from the bridge. You make it two steps back before the anxiety of not seeing the water wins over and your body practically shies away from John.
"I can't- I can't go, he…" You begin, biting your cheek until it bleeds, stuck in a state of shock that you can't shake.
"John, what if he didnt-" You sob, unable to finish the sentence that plagues your mind along with the image of his plummet.
"He did… Star I ain't goin back to camp missing two people, please come home." He pleads, turning as law whistles sound in the distance.
"No. I can't." You say, stern in your choice. Because what is there to go back to without him? And what if he needs help?
"Where will you go?" He asks, glancing to the whistles in the distance.
"I guess across the river so I-" your face crumbles at the idea, "so I can look for him."
John nods, whistling lowly for Old Boy. The horse trots forward, and John quickly unwraps his camp kit from Old Boy's saddle before tightening it onto Athena's.
"My camp kit. Take it, you'll need it." He turns to you then, red eyes looking into yours. "Be safe out here… and don't lose yourself. Arthurs my brother. But if he ain't back in a day or two, you gotta come home. He'd want that." John says, voice even raspier than usual as he deals with his emotion. You nod, tears filling your eyes as places his hand on your shoulder.
"If he comes back to camp I'll come for you right away." He offers, and you nod.
And then he's mounting up, offering you a bittersweet tip of his hat as he rides away. And you're suddenly alone. There's no one here to pick up your broken pieces, so you pick them up yourself, climbing into the saddle and cantering away from the approaching law whistles. You don't try to stop the tears. Some are silent, sliding down your face and dripping into your saddle, but some are loud, and you have to leave go of the reins to sob into your hands. You make it to the other side of the river thanks to Athena, with Balius trotting beside you the entire way. No one tells you what to do when something like this happens. You're lost, left to figure it out as you operate like a shell of a human being, going through the motions to avoid the law.
Once you're across the Dakota, situated just on the treeline close to the bank you slide down from your mare to sit in the grass, knees held up to your chin as you watch the water. You've never seen it so still. There's not a ripple other than the steady flow out to the lake. The law whistles get louder, and you listen for them as you numbly watch the water for hours, lost in your head. Eventually the law dissipates, giving up and going home.
You don't know if he's dead or not, but the chances of him being okay right now are bad. The bridge hangs over the horizon like a tyrant, a constant reminder of what's just happened. You try to avoid looking at it, try to avoid seeing the fall, the fear in his eyes as his feet left the train.
You can't help but drift to the fact that your last real conversation was an argument, and you ache to go back in time and spend the day at his picnic like he'd planned. He was right about you. You're a hypocrite. All Arthur has done since you met him was offer kindness when you didn't deserve it. He gave and gave and you took and took. He told you his feelings time and again through his words and his actions. And you rejected him again and again. All because you were afraid. He said it when you went fishing with Jack, he said it when you danced at Sean's party and when you were drunk under the stars. Arthur told you he would wait. He would wait until you were ready. And here you are. It appears your time is up, and Arthur has waited all he can.
You think back to that first night in Colter, what you'd told yourself that rang out to be true… good people die.
Nothing happens for a long while. You don't move, and your limbs ache from your curled up position, but you don't care. You've been watching the water for hours to no avail, but then it happens. Something small washes up on the shore, something black. And as soon as your eyes flicker towards it your face crumples, and falls into your knees with a sob.
"No, no, not him- please." You whimper to yourself quietly, realizing that he's really gone.
You wipe away your tears, finding the strength to stand up from the grass and pluck the object from the shoreline where it washed up. In your hand is an all too familiar black leather hat, wrapped with rope and adorned with a one of a kind hat ornament.
You place it on the ground by your legs, curling in on yourself as the grief overtakes you, causing your body to ache and your lungs to burn from the sobs that erupt from them.
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#arthur morgan x female reader#arthur morgan x reader#tfiye#arthur morgan#arthur morgan x y/n#arthur morgan x you#rdr2 fanfic#red dead redemption two#red dead redemption 2
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TW: Gun violence.
Hey yall.
As many of you know, there was supposed to be a Super Bowl parade/rally in KC today, to celebrate the Chiefs superbowl victory.
Sadly, when the rally ended, someone shot up the celebration. 9 and maybe more people confirmed injured and so far one death has been confirmed. Two arrests have been made so far. Thankfully, it appears none of the Chiefs players, coaches or staff are injured.
I live in the KC area, though I wasn't at the parade, so don't worry. I'm safe.
To any of my fellow KC locals, I hope you guys are also okay and please stay safe out there. And to anyone just coming across this, if you have the time and energy, please send some good vibes and, if you're religious, maybe a prayer too. And friendly reminder to anyone reading into this to please take care of yourselves as well.
Additionally, just a warning for those just learning about this, some news articles do show pictures of the injured being taken to ambulances. Please be careful when looking into this (and I advise against posting any of those pictures here).
#tw gun violence#kansas city chiefs#nfl#serious#personal#tw violence#sports#sportsblr#kansas city#and on valentine's day too of all days...
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Could you please write more BNHA Pro Heroes as Incorrect Quotes. I need a Pt.2
OMG Im so happy that someone wanted a part 2 to one of my favorite posts that I made!! Here yall go!
(Few trigger warnings before we begin: Use if swearing, and mentions of violence an alcohol. Let me know if I missed anything!)
Ships mentioned (Vaugley and outright): Erasermic, Edgejeanist, Nightmight, and Kamui x Mount Lady
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Eraserhead: You have to apologize to Takeyama.
Midnight: Fine.
Midnight: 'Unfuck you' or whatever.
All Might: You often use humor to deflect trauma.
Nighteye: Thank you!
All Might: I didn't say that was a good thing.
Nighteye: What I'm hearing is, you think I'm funny.
Present Mic: Do you remember that horrible roommate you had back in college?
Eraserhead: You mean you?
Mount Lady: Sometimes I feel like dying.
Kamui Woods: Wha-
Mount Lady: And then I remember that I won't be able to see you if I do.
Kamui Woods: *blushes*
———————————————————————
Best Jeanist: Sometimes I feel like dying.
Edgeshot: Good for you.
Miruko: Do I look nice?
Fat Gum: You look like you're about to set someone on fire.
Miruko: Perfect.
Present Mic: A fistfight CAN be romantic.
Miruko: And you know what the worst part is?
Ryukyuu: That you're having to process your pain without vodka?
Miruko: No.
Miruko: Yeah.
Midnight: If you found out you only had one day left to live, what would you do with it?
Eraserhead: Say goodbye and mend my relationships.
Present Mic: Something illegal.
Shirakumo: Accept my fate.
Tensei: I would message ten people saying that if they didn't forward the message to 10 other people, I would die tomorrow.
Eraserhead: What?
Shirakumo: That's fucking awesome. Can I change my answer?
Eraserhead: Hizashi, just GO TO THE HOSPITAL
Present Mic: Who's stab wound is this???? Is it OUR stab wound???? No! Stay out of it!
Hawks: I'm the proud owner of an IQ of 5 (and a half)!
Endeavor: Not for long.
Hawks: Please. It's all I have.
Present Mic: "Ladies and gentlemen" is unnecessarily gendered, overly formal, lengthy, and honestly I'm falling asleep already.
Present Mic: "Cowards", on the other hand, is inclusive to all genders, casual and fun. Short and to the point, exciting, and dramatic.
Nighteye: You look like a corpse that was just pulled out of the river.
Present Mic: Wrong. I look like a cool rock star who just OD'd in their own pool. Big difference.
Gang Orca: I made lightly fried fish fillets for dinner.
Edgeshot: Kuugo, It’s 1:15 am, what the fuck.
Gang Orca: Do you want the lightly fried fish fillets or not.
Edgeshot: Well, I mean yeah.
Gang Orca: So come downstairs while they’re still hot.
Best Jeanist: Wait, you just made them?
Gang Orca: Yeah, I wasn’t tired so I decided to make lightly fried fish fillets.
Edgeshot: Say lightly fried fish fillets one more time Kuugo.
Present Mic: *speaking Spanish*
Eraserhead: I know, I know.
All Might: You speak Spanish?
Eraserhead: No. I just know the phrase, 'this is all your fault' in every language Hizashi speaks.
All Might: I would never say that Mirai is a bitch and I don’t don’t like him. That’s not true…Mirai is a bitch and I like him so much!
Edgeshot: Sometimes, I don’t realize an event was traumatic until I tell it as a funny story and notice everyone is staring at me weird.
*Present Mic sneezes*
Eraserhead: Hizashi, are you sick? Here, let me wrap you in a blanket and hand-feed you some warm soup while singing you a lullaby!
*anyone else sneezes*
Eraserhead: Oh my god. Shut the hell up.
Hawks: Uptown Funk would've made it into the Shrek Soundtrack.
Miruko: That's the truest statement I've ever heard.
Fat Gum: Hey Sasaki?
Nighteye: Yeah?
Fat Gum: What's your favorite color of the alphabet? True or false?
Nighteye:
Nighteye: ...What.
Ryukyuu: So, what's it like living with Hakamada?
Edgeshot: They once referred to sand as "heterosexual glitter."
Ryukyuu: ...
Edgeshot: I love them so much.
Fat Gum: I’m sorry, I really flew off the handle back there. It was like the handle was a bald guy going really fast, and I was his toupée.
Someone interviewing the Lurkers: What are the hardest things to say?
Mount Lady: I was wrong.
Edgeshot: I need help.
Kamui Woods: Worcestershire sauce.
Eraserhead: You’re drunk.
Present Mic: Correction: drinking. Present tense. Grammar, Shouta.
Endeavor: How did none of you hear what I just said?!
Hawks: I've been zoned out for the past two and a half hours.
Best Jeanist: I got distracted halfway through.
Edgeshot: Ignoring you was a conscious decision.
Hawks: If you put a milkshake in one yard and crack open a cold one in another yard, which yard would the boys go to?
All Might: Schrödinger's boys.
Miruko: FUCK!
Present Mic: What about cracking open a cold milkshake?
Nighteye: As we all know, the milkshake brings the boys to the yard. The presence of the boys is a prerequisite for the cracking open of a cold one, but cold ones do not have any inherent boy-attracting abilities. Milkshakes, however, do.
Nighteye: All else being equal, the boys would proceed to the milkshake yard. While it is possible to announce the presence of cold ones in the hope of attracting some boys, the pull of the milkshake is much more powerful by comparison.
Hawks: ...
All Might: ...
Miruko: ...
Present Mic: ...
Nighteye: Mind you, all of this nonsense hinges on whether or not the boys are back in town.
#bnha#my hero academia#boku no hero academia#pro heros#eraserhead#aizawa shouta#shouta aizawa#present mic#yamada hizashi#hizashi yamada#erasermic#edgeshot#kamihara shinya#shinya kamihara#best jeanist#hakamada tsunagu#tsunagu hakamata#edgejeanist#all might#yagi toshinori#toshinori yagi#sir nighteye#sasaki mirai#mirai sasaki#nightmight
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Chuck Hansen X F!Reader (Birthday special)
Warnings: Jealous chuck, Violence, Talk of sexual stuff, Gets a bit spicy, Swearing, a bit of angst, Chuck being a butt, MDNI! 18+ / ageless blogs don't interact!! Or you will be blocked
Word count: 4.7k
Other:
Reader can put her hair in a low pony, and is described as being shorter than chuck and she goes to the gym, as well as her cheeks can become red. Chuck is also able to pick her up, but only for a few split seconds and can carry her a few feet from a wall to a bed. But other than that, she is very open ended
this was purely self-indulgent, I love Chuck so much and I wanted to do something for him for his birthday. let me know if yall want part two with the smut. also, we are gonna pretend they are at the shatterdome for like a year before they close the breach, we also gonna pretend like he doesn't die. sorry for any grammar issues or sentences just don't make sense, I'm sometimes really bad at writing things, and other times my writing sounds amazing
His birthday is Aug 14th. so this will be posted on Aug 14th.
The alarm blared loudly in my ears. Groaning, I pull myself up out of bed. I stretch, hearing the bed across from me rustle. I look over, my older brother Jacob is still fast asleep. Smirking widely I make my way to his bedside.
Cupping my hands around my mouth I scream “JACOB!!” in his ear. Jacob bolts upright, “Where's the danger?!” he rapidly looks around finally setting his eyes on me and groaning. I walk over to our shared bathroom grabbing my uniform as he gets up off his bed. I give our two dogs, Xerxes the Doberman and Baron the Deutsch Drathaar, pats on the head I close the bathroom door before changing into my uniform. I head out of the bathroom to see Jacob finish zipping up his uniform top. We both grab our bomber jackets, Jacob puts his on, the large silver lettering displayed across his back our Jaegers symbol in gold underneath. I threw my jacket over my shoulder holding it there. We both put our aviators on and headed out the door. The voice announced over the kaiju alarm.
“Kaiju alert, Sideswipe pilots please report to your conn-pod station.” walking down the hallway, many of the others moved out of the way.
“So how's it going with Alice?” I asked my co-pilot nonchalantly, looking at him as he whipped his head around his mouth hanging open slightly.
“How did you find out about that?!” he whisper shouted, looking around to make sure no one else heard. Smirking I look forward “She told me. I mean I am friends with her.” I said like it was no big deal. I chuckled when I heard him groan “I didn't know she was telling people about us…” I shrugged the two sets of dog tags around my neck jangling. “I'm pretty sure she only told me, since im your sister.” we walk past LOCCENT, a quick glance inside I see the Hansen boys, Mako Mori, Raleigh Becket, Cherno Alpha’s pilots, and the Wei Tang brothers.
While there is an actual kaiju attack, we are the only Jaeger being sent out. Since my brother and I are a newer Jaeger pair, Marshall Pentecost wants us to show off our skills to the other Jaeger pilots. We finally reached our conn-pod station. Jacob and I place our jackets and aviators neatly in a pile on one of the benches at our station.
Pulling my hair up into a low ponytail, our crew gets to work helping us put our armor on. I hear the marshall and a group of people walk to the entrance of our station. A low psst sounds from my brother's direction, I look at him with a slightly annoyed look “What?!” I whisper harshly, he smirks softly “What about Chuck?” he whispers back, my eyebrows crease in confusion, glancing at the aforementioned pilot, who was watching us like the rest of the group.
“What about him?” I whisper back at my brother, whose smirk only gets wider “You fuck ‘im yet?” he whispers back, my face turning bright red. The crew members who were working on us paused, some also going bright red, A few of them snickering. I glared at the group, “is there a problem?” an authoritative voice rings out. Jacob and I freeze, gulping. I glance at the marshall “No sir.” Jacob and I answered at the same time. Our team hastily resumed their work, Jacob and I straightened our backs staring straight forward “Good.” the marshall simply states. The last piece of my suit is secured in place, our helmets are handed to us.
I look over at my brother “Ready, Luke?'' His nickname comes out harshly “As ever, Leia.” He brings his fist up waiting expectantly, a big grin stretches across my face, and I hit my own fist against it. We head into our conn-pod, “Good luck pilots.” Marshall Pentecost says before leading the group away. We step into our footholds, Jacob to my left, our team hooks us up to the neural bridge, and we both put our helmets on.
“Testing 1, 2, 3, Sideswipe can you hear me?” Tendo’s voice sounds out, and Jacob reaches his right arm up to the control panel. “We hear you loud and clear Mission control.” Jacob lets his arm fall. “Initializing neural handshake.” I feel the pull at the back of my head as we enter the drift. Memories from our childhood in Wisconsin flowed through, everything that flashed between us is stuff we'd both seen before. Memories of our younger brother Atlan float by too. We are brought out of the drift quickly “Neural handshake completed and holding strong.” our jaeger is then picked up to be brought to the kaiju.
Jacob’s mind fills up with explicit images of his girlfriend making me gag in disgust. “Dude, are you really thinking about Alice like that right now?!” I yell over at my copilot. He smirks and looks over at me. “Well you're thinking about how you'd like to screw that-” Cutting him off I yell at him “-that nothing, im not thinking about screwing anyone!” although both he and I knew that wasnt the case, we were in each others head, we can't lie. Memories of Chuck when he's working out in the base gym flash in my head, and my mind wanders to the memory of how the muscles in his arms strained and moved while he worked out. I was always blessed when he decided to wear tank tops while he did. Him being so hot in a tank top got me hurt once.
“C'mon, you got this! You are so close!” Jacob had challenged me to see who could run for the longest time on the treadmills. Anytime we did this I would share my earbuds and blast music to keep us going. Jacob gave up ¾ of the way through my run, but I was close to beating my record on how many miles I could run in one go, which was 3.5 miles. I was nearing the record, and Jacob and a few others were cheering me on.
When I finally hit it, the small group that had formed around me started cheering, but I wasnt completely tired yet so I wanted to keep pushing. Right after I hit 4 miles, that's when he appeared, large arm muscles and broad shoulders being shown off by the tank top. Chuck asked one of the others around me what was going on, gripping the towel around his neck, but when he glanced at me my foot slipped out from underneath me.
I slid down the treadmill, pulling the emergency cord with me. Although the treadmill shut off pretty quickly, I still got shot to the floor. My right arm and leg burned. “Shit! Y/N!” Jacob leaned down near me, rolling me onto my left side to assess the damage to my right side. I groaned opening my eyes, asking my brother silently how bad it was. He answered through our link “It doesn't look too bad, just bad rugburns in a sense.” I saw Chuck peer over my face, his beautifully hot, sweaty face, filled with concern. “Ya alrigh’ love?” my face flushed red, not trusting my voice I nod.
“Dude stop that! I don’t need to see you drooling over lover boy-” Jacob nearly screamed at me, shaking me out of my thoughts, “You’re such a little baby.” I retorted. The helicopters above us slow down getting ready to drop us. We both brace ourselves when Jacob speaks “But I’m your little baby” I can practically hear the smirk in his tone. The cables on our Jaeger snap and we are released. When we land we steady ourselves, Jacob and I share a look, before we turn our attention to the kaiju in front of us, not making a move until we say “Let's kill this piece of shit.”
Time skip
Our Jaeger docks in the shatterdome, the head lifts off Sideswipe, and heads up to our station. We get unhooked from the neural bridge, taking off our helmets we make our way out to our docking station. We see the marshall and the other Jaeger pilots having a conversation at the entrance of the room, our team starts to disassemble our suits.
Jacob and I face the group of pilots, as the last few bits of our suits are taken off. I try not to glance at Chuck, but I can't help but look at him at least once, I find him looking away from everyone with his arms crossed. Jacob and I head to our jackets, we unpile the stuff, taking what was ours. I put my boots back on after folding my aviators on the collar of my uniform. I sling my jacket over my shoulder again as Jacob puts his on. We approach the group that was blocking our way out, our crew long gone.
The marshall turned towards us, I gave him a nod, and Jacob addressed him directly, his normally light, joking tone replaced by a cold serious one. “Marshall.” the marshall gave us both a curt nod.
“You two performed well,” the marshall starts, “Color me impressed.” he offers us a small smile before turning back towards the group and walking out. The Wei Tang brothers and the Cherno Alpha pilots leave with the Marshall, Herc comes up to us giving us both a pat on the shoulder. Before Herc leaves he gives me a strange look, like he's trying to tell me something. Mako and Raleigh both tell us Good job before walking out as well. Jacob heads out giving me a knowing look as I take notice that Chuck is still here. I turn towards Chuck, who has his arms crossed over his broad chest, an annoyed look on his face, as he stares off into a corner of the room.
Making my way over, I place my jacket over my arm, as I get closer to Chuck I can see he's lost in thought. “Hey.” I stop about 2 feet in front of him. It seems to snap him out of his trance, he looks at me quickly before he storms out of the room. I sat there gaping staring after him. What was that about?
I make my way down to the mess hall since it was dinner, but not before stopping by Jacob and i’s room to grab the dogs and to change. I change into a gray T-shirt and black cargo pants, keeping my combat boots on and both sets of dog tags. A few weeks after Jacob and I became friends with the Hansen boys, I had a gift left on our doorstep. Chuck had given me a spare set of his dog tags, he wrote a note saying that he wanted someone to get his dog tags when he died, and most likely his main set would be impossible to recover. He said that he thought id be a good choice. If he saw them find a home around my neck, he didn't say anything. While we barely knew each other a few weeks, we had become really good friends. I put my aviators on, grabbed the dogs' leashes, and headed toward the mess hall.
Xerxes was a pretty tall muscular dog, he was a traditional-looking Doberman; black coat, docked tail, and cropped ears to stand tall. Baron was on the smaller side, still a big dog, but he wasnt as tall, he was somewhat stocky and looked very mean but was a sweetheart, both of them are. Baron's black coat was littered with singular white hairs across his chest, feet, and face he was a traditional Drahthaar with a docked tail as well.
With one dog on each side of me, I made my way into the mess hall. I see Jacob already sitting with Herc and Chuck, so I stop by the table and hand the dogs over, who immediately lay down next to the table. I head up to the counter and grab my food. When I get back to the table, I sit down across from Jacob and next to Chuck in my normal spot. The dogs move from their spot and lay down by me, I could feel Max under the table resting his head on my foot. We all talked, but Chuck wouldn't say a thing to me. He wouldn't even look at me, the air around us got awkward. As soon as Chuck was done eating he jumped up and stormed off. He even left Max, which he never does.
I look over at Herc, my face contorted in confusion and hurt.
“Sorry kid, he's an ass sometimes,” he shrugs before continuing, “I think I have an idea of wha’ it’s about but he needs to deal with it on his own.” Herc gets up, not realizing that Max was still under the table. I look at Jacob still confused “What is it with you men being cryptic all the time?” I ask him. He shrugs “I guess we're just programmed like that” he takes a bite of his food “Not everybody is like me and expresses their feelings.” he chuckles softly. Taking a bite of my food I smile. “You are truly one of a kind.” I laugh swallowing my food, “and not in a good way.” he pretends to pout. “Well thanks, sis for being so nice to your big brother.” he sarcastically comments. We stare each other down for a few moments before we burst out laughing.
We finish eating so I get up to throw my tray away. “Can you take the dogs back to the room? I gotta get Max back to Chuck,” I asked Jacob, Max’s head perking up, Jacob nodded. I called Max, and he got up and followed me while I dumped my tray. Making my way out of the mess hall with Max following behind me. I slowly walk through the shatterdome halls not really knowing where Chuck is.
Luckily I see Herc, I call out for him "Herc!!" He looks behind him spotting me and stops. "Do you know where Chuck is?" He nodded scratching his chin "he's in his room." Turning around I head back down the hallway calling out a thank you as Max chased after me down the hall.
Arriving at Chuck's door I hesitate before finally knocking. I hear some rustling before I hear faintly from behind the door "What?!". Glancing down at Max I slowly speak up "I-it's me," swallowing some spit I continue, "You left Max in the mess hall so I brought him to you." Hearing nothing I sigh, "I-i don't know what I did, but I'm sorry…" still getting no response I leave Max at the door and head back to my room.
Chuck ignored me for the next week. I started eating up by my Jaeger's conn-pod station. The dogs often joined me, offering me sympathy as they rest their heads against my legs.
One day Herc came running up "Kid I need your help! Raleigh told me chucks gone crazy, said he's beating up some guy in mess." I didn't look up from my food, he kneeled beside me "Look I know he's been an asshole lately but you might be the only one able to stop him." I finally nod. We run down the halls to get down to the mess hall. When we reach the dining area chucks on top of a guy, clutching his shirt and screaming at him. Herc and I run to Chuck, we both manage to pull him off of the guy, and I push Chuck away from him by his chest. His face was full of anger and hatred. His body was tense beneath my hands but seemed to relax as he managed to feel my hands on him. "Chuck you need to calm down…" I spoke softly, he looked down at me relaxing more.
He tensed once more when the guy spoke up "Yeah that's right you gotta get your daddy and your little piece of ass to stand up for you." I looked back at him, feeling Chuck get angry again. I see my brother obviously being held back by his girlfriend Alice. Chuck goes to move but I push firmly on his chest "Don't call her that!" Chuck's voice seething with anger. Herc steps beside me helping me keep him back. Noticing that the guy is one of my crew members, getting a little pissed off myself I step towards him. "How 'bout instead of focusing on other people's lives you focus on keeping that mouth of yours shut, 'cause it just cost you your job."
The large group of personnel all snicker and laugh at the man. Two guys quickly grab him and leave the mess hall. I turn around to face Chuck, his face and hands were bruised, bleeding, and cut up. I take his arm in my hand, feeling his warm skin, I guide him back to his room. Our three combined dogs follow behind us.
When we reach his room I open the door as he and the dogs walk in. I push him softly towards the bed. Grabbing his first aid kit, knowing exactly where it was from the countless times I'd had to patch him up. Turning back to Chuck his shirt is off as he looks down. A large bruise is starting to form on his stomach. Small cuts litter his shoulder. "God Chuck, what happened…?" I whisper making my way back to him. Trying to focus on patching him up and not the fact that he's shirtless. I sit next to him a slowly tend to his wounds. He doesn't look at me or speak. Only halfway done I get fed up "Chuck." He doesn't look up. "Chuck. Look at me.." I caress his cheek with one hand, slowly forcing his head to face me. "Chuck, what happened…?" His eyes finally met mine before quickly turning his head away from me. He shrugs slowly getting off his bed "The guy was just being a piece of shit, I just tried putting him in his place." His tone is relaxed like it was no big deal.
"I can clean the rest of my cuts, you can go." He rummaged through one of his drawers. I watched his back, trying not to gawk, but I snapped out of it. I stood up and walked towards him. "No im staying because we need to talk about you being a total ass hat." He whipped around, I could feel the heat in my face for two reasons. Anger was starting to form on my face, but my face was red from being face-to-face with him. His expression went from confusion to annoyance and anger.
"There's nothing to talk about." His voice raised slightly, I clenched my hands, my nails digging into my palms. "Why won't you talk to me?!" I yelled at him, tears forming in my eyes "What did I do?!" He just looked away from me, knowing I wasn't going to get an answer. I pulled my dog tags out of my shirt. I swiftly grabbed his tags and pulled them off from around my neck, I slapped it down behind him. I turned around and walked to his door, opening it. "Xerxes, Baron, let's go," I called out to my dogs who jumped up and followed me out of the room.
For the next month, I completely avoided him. Herc tried to get me to talk to him but I refused. I always ate in my conn-pod. I always went to the base's gym late at night when no one was there. Jacob was worried, I could feel it through the drift, he noticed I was distracted. I was and I was miserable. Every part of me just wanted to run to Chuck and tell him how much he means to me but my mind was telling me that he didn't want me. He clearly displayed that.
On Chuck's birthday, I made sure I stayed in my room the whole day but that was short-lived when Marshall Pentecost called Jacob and me down to his office. When I entered the room I saw Chuck and herc standing by the Marshall's desk. Before I could even think about leaving Jacob was pushing me towards the front, and the door closed behind us. The marshall stood up from his desk. Herc and Jacob went by the marshall as he moved out from behind his desk. "It's been brought to my attention that you two are having some sort of problem." The marshall starts, clasping his hands in front of him. Chuck and I don't glance at each other. I keep my distance from him, Jacob is looking at me with his disappointed older brother face. "I've noticed that it has significantly affected your performance as pilots," I cross my arms in front of me, I admit I have been very tired since I've been up late working out. "So I've decided that you two will stay in Ranger Hansen's room until the problem gets solved. Hercules, Jacob, if you could please." The marshall motioned to us, but before we could protest he glared at us, "That is an order." Not wanting to get on his bad side we both let Herc and Jacob lead us to Chuck's room.
When we arrive at the door they open it and shove us inside. The door closes quickly. We stand in silence before I take a seat on the floor near the door. He sits on his bed, head in his hands. I pull my knees up to my chest, leaning my head back and looking at the ceiling. The silence is killing me so I pull my iPod out, plug in my headphones, and select my playlist. I hit play as I push the earbud into my left ear. I tap my foot along to the music and close my eyes. I can feel Chuck's eyes shift to me but I don't look at him. Tears start to prick at the corners of my eyes. Opening my eyes I turn my head away from Chuck.
"I-i don't know what I did to make you hate me…" I speak more to myself than to Chuck. I hear him click his tongue, and a faint curse leaves his lips. He stands up and moves to lean against the wall opposite me. "I don't hate you love." He hits the wall lightly in frustration, "It's the exact fucking opposite…" He turns to face me, as the tears run down my face. I stand up with anger, "What the fuck does that mean?!" I yell at him, I press pause on my music and take out my earbud. He takes a step forward looking away for a second, "I'm in love with you God dammit!" He yells out in frustration, raising clenched fists for a second. He turns around sighing, running his hand through his hair.
"What…?" My voice comes out in a small squeak, not sure if I heard him. "I'm in love with you. But I heard you and your brother talking about someone, he was talking about how you wanted to screw someone you liked." He turned back to me with his hands on his hips. "I just knew you weren't talking about me and I just got so pissed. And then that guy from your crew was talking about your body at lunch and I just saw red." He explained. I heard what he said but it didn't process, I was still stuck on one thing. "You're in love with me?" I looked up at him, my face frozen in surprise. He scoffed "That's all you can focus on?" He looked away from me and I smiled softly. I quickly grabbed the collar of his shirt and pulled him down, smashing my lips against his.
He pulled back quickly "What are you-" but I didn't let him speak, pulling his face down again. He kissed back roughly, placing his hands on my hips, pulling me closer. I wrapped my arms around his neck. When I needed air I pulled back, a smile on my lips. "We were talking about you." He cocked his head to the side, raising his eyebrow, "Jacob and I. We were talking about you, you are the only one that has been on my mind for the past 5 months." He smirked. He stepped back for a second realizing something, he walked to his dresser. Grabbing something off of it he walked back to me. He lifted his hand, dropping the object, revealing his spare dog tags dangling from his hand. But he didn't put them around my neck, he put them around his, then took off his main pair.
Transferring his main dog tags from his neck to my neck. I looked down at the tags, before looking up at him as he placed his hands on my hips. "Take my real ones, to show that I'm yours." He smiled softly, I got an idea, I took my dog tags off my neck, and put them over his head. "Then take mine, to show im yours." smiling he pulled me back in for another kiss. Our lips moved in sync, he tapped the back of my thigh signaling me to jump. I jumped up, his hands hooked under my legs. I wrapped my legs around his waist as he pushed my back against the wall. His mouth moved from mine, down my jaw to my neck. He moves around my neck kissing, biting, and sucking marks into my skin. His hips slowly grind into mine as I moan out his name. He pulls back, admiring his work on my skin, he looks into my eyes, kissing me again. This time it's slow, sweet, and delicate.
Pulling away I whisper to him, “Ya’know you were pretty hot when you were angry at that guy.” he smirks at my words, and he responds in a low raspy voice, his accent going straight to my core “I reckon I should get mad more often then ay?” I bite my lip slightly. “That day I fell on the treadmill, was because of you…” I slowly confessed, “You were just so hot in that tank top, all sweaty.” it seemed as if my words went straight to his pants. He nodded signaling me to keep going, “I couldn't keep my eyes off you, you do things to me that no one else can.” I lightly kissed his jaw, whispering sensually to him. “You dont know how much self-restraint it takes me to not touch you like I want to.” I sucked a few hickeys into his neck earning some groans from him.
“You have no idea what you do to me darlin’...” his voice comes out as a groan, I moan as his hips rub into mine again. He pulls back, bringing me away from the wall and over to his bed. He sits down with me in his lap, he rubs circles into my back as he looks at me. “Im sorry I was such a dickhead to you…” he apologized softly, “You dont deserve that.” I shook my head slightly. “It's alright Chuck, people make mistakes.” I placed a kiss on his lips, “Think of me as a birthday present from me because I love you and I want to be yours.” I smiled. He chuckled softly before kissing me, “Then this is the best birthday ever,” he smirked, “and right now I just want to unwrap my present from my girlfriend.” I laughed softly, as he slowly laid me on my back on his bed. He hovers over me as I give him the consent that he pleads for with his eyes. “Go ahead, handsome.” he quickly kisses me, running his hands along my body as his knee rests between my legs. He pulls back for a quick second “You better sit your pretty little ass next to me at dinner, I've missed you a lot, princess.” I giggle softly at him, “I've missed you too, hot stuff.” he smirks before pressing his lips hungrily against mine.
#x reader#oneshot#chuck hansen#mako mori#raleigh becket#pacific rim#hercules hansen#stacker pentecost#Chuck Hansen x reader#female reader#chuck hansen x y/n
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Le sign... speaking of the server,
dirk is encouraging me to be more firm on my own thoughts for my comfort
i've seen ppl talk about it in stream a lil which im always like I Don't Care when it pops up but i've had Enough and i want to talk about the topic bc it's itching at my brain follicles.
since we're pretty strider-oriented, this had to happen at some point: strider cest/strilonde cest/in cest wont be allowed in the main server. if other people don't care, i might make a separate server.
-"hey why is that ^ something you would allow? pretty insane." / "are you a pro shipper then??"
no
"so you're an anti?"
also no
i dislike this argument as a whole bc i don't 'get it' i guess because im audhd. neither side is fully correct nor fully wrong.
"fiction affects reality." and "fiction is not reality." are two different thought processes that can and should coexist in the same space.
look. fiction can affect reality, but it IS also possible to separate from it. you can para or whatever responsibly. tag it. try to make sure people who don't want to see it don't have to see it. and if minors are getting sent your shit, make sure its clear that this should NOT be happening in reality.
if you're a child, keep that shit blocked. it's NOT for you and you should not be actively consuming it. (please listen to this advice bc i grew up on the internet barely supervised, from a very unhealthily early age [7-8] and then developed into a fucked up hypersexual.)
(seeing something fucked up and being like AUGH my eyes! is normal because that just. happens. thats life. you deal with it afterwards in some way. talking to someone you trust etc. you do not go back for more i am begging.)
(if someone is showing you these things on purpose then please read this website all the way through for me ok?)
you should not be looking at an adult exploring/enjoying fucked up shit
videogames are not going to make you or me more violent by having violence, gore, and murder in them.
but videogames DO make some people violent. those people should not have access to these things. but we (you and i) cannot control that beyond making sure content is labelled and set aside.
i like playing games where i assassinate people. i am not an assassin. someone could play the same game and get terrible ideas they act on. this is not my fault for playing the game.
and, if you're an adult who likes fucked up shit (me too) tag your shit or have it listed somewhere on your about that it's something you post about frequently there. and maybe reiterate that it's not real. its just toys. and should never be followed irl.
yeah, it fuckin sucks that we gotta do this shit, but kids are unfortunately on the internet, with the inability to differentiate grey from black and white. your shit might be the first exposure. which sucks!!
so it's our responsibility to try and mitigate harm on both sides unfortunately until we can convince parents to start parenting their children again. which sucks. i just wanna post shit in peace but the buzzing around from very loud teenagers makes me anxious. i get it.
it fucking sucks!!! but we can't control other people, especially if theyre malicious
but you control what YOU see on the internet. block anyone. (i blocked someone back in the day for disliking johndave. be free.)
and help people do that (control what they see) by making it very clear.
you aren't evil for not wanting to see it, and other people aren't evil for enjoying fucked up content.
also some of yall on BOTH SIDES do some truly vile shit in the name of this argument when your energy could be spent elsewhere doing shit you like or even doing things that are actually. Helpful.
so i don't like either label i dont want to be associated with either of the sides but if you want to call me one or the other then . Whatever i guess? thats your business, not mine.
just know you are not a failure or a freak for not constantly reinforcing and reassuring everyone that you think adults doing their own thing in fictional spaces with little toy dolls (that theyve been doing since the 70s-80s) is gross. you can just think that like. in general and look away because the dolls are dolls.
but don't go posting doll horn-knees untagged. that's rude as fuck.
#community infighting is NOT the way. everyone thinks we're ALL fucking weird. just IGNORE each other#timaeus posting#mumbling#dirk is holding me at gun point to post this because he's Tired tm
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My asks, requests, and suggestions are open!
I know not many people look at the things I make but yall. Pls. I am BEGGING you for some writing prompts. Or literally anything like that. Art block is killing me.
As you can likely tell, I’m used to doing Vox related shit. I can do basically any Vox ship, but I usually do x reader. I do think I have a good understanding of the radiostatic, radiosilence, and staticmoth dynamics, but specifications are always great! I’m also open to Polycule Vees and again, literally anything to do with Vox.
As far as other characters go? I’m familiar enough with Lucifer, Alastor, Valentino, Adam and Niffty to be confident in writing them. Everyone else is kinda eh. I know the characters well enough, I just have trouble portraying them and how complex they are sometimes. So keep that in mind, I guess.
Sexual stuff is fine, so is angst, violence, gore, etc. I’m fine with more graphic topics (This is Hell, after all). Fluff and wholesome shit would be hella cute if you have any ideas! Basically just don’t be a prick and you’ll probably be fine. Anything NSFW is fine by me, I’m perfectly comfortable writing it. And don’t worry, I’ll be sure to tag any and all sensitive topics in my posts as best I can.
Asks, story requests, suggestions, etc. about or applying to my ‘Be A Doll’ AU are more than welcome!
TLDR; I’m a Vox simp dying of lack of ideas for writing. Please send yours in through my ask box. I will take literally anything. (But I do have a preference for the Be A Doll AU because it’s so fucked up and delicious to write)
#asks open#send help#send asks#send me asks#any suggestions?#reqs open#request#hazbin hotel#hazbin hotel vox#hazbin vox#vox#ao3 writer#writing#writing help#please help#i’m bored#i’m going insane#i need to write#be a doll#hazbin hotel fanfiction#vox fanfiction
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I really loved ur short story ‘Bakugou’s game’ I would love to see a part 2 of it. Maybe a few months later or something reader is trying to get over bakugou and is really cold to him when he tries to fix their relationship and he sees her at a party with a date and he gets super jealous and possessive after seeing them together. Which leads to make up sex and hopefully reader giving bakugou a chance to make it up to her. Or be totally angsty and make reader pull a uno reverse of him.
Bakugou’s Game: Part 2.
Requested by: @jasmixs @ooftrain-12 @tsukikoxo @coffeeginie
Part one: https://antiwhores.tumblr.com/post/693877274172440576/bakugous-game
Sorry this shit took so long frfr. Ive been SO busy lately to the point its actually insane. Havent had time to even write a sliver of this. Yall probably lost interest but ill post it anyone out of respect for the og request
Warnings: Jealousy, minor violence (reader slaps bakugou again LOL L bozo), rough sex, creampie, happy ending and shit, make up sex, NOT EDITED - BARE WITH ME HERE.
Bakugou was misreable without you, the break up eats him away until he forced himself to go out to speak to you.
Bakugou never understood the idea of someone being so sorrowful about a break up that they forget their pride and beg for the person back. That is, until now. He’s starting to understand why people take break ups so badly. Cause he’s taking it badly.
Everyday is a new thing to notice. Everyday is a new thing he didn’t even know he was used to after dating you so long gone.
When he came home to his apartment you weren’t there to welcome him. When he walked past the bathroom you wernt there to sing horrible on purpose in the shower to annoy him. When he ate at the table you wernt there to tell him about your day in an exaggerated tone. When he sat down on the bed without changing you wernt there to yell at him for his outside clothes touching the clean mattress. When he spiced his food to hot you wernt there to dramatically cough and pretend to fall over. When he woke up in the middle of the night you weren’t there to tell him to “close them damn eyes again”.
Everything was different. He hasn’t moved a single bit of his furniture yet the house changed drastically.
He started to lack on his chores, throwing himself into his hero work. He exhausted his body to the point of throwing up. That and the combination of the lack of sleep and the lack of rest.
He had nightmares of how he acted. It would usually play out with you doing what he did to you. It was insufferable. Every single thing in his dream was something that he’s done before.
He looked down at his phone with his newly founder insomniac eyes.
Doll, Im so sorry. It will NEVER happen again. Im a fucking idiot and I’d do anything to make it up to you. Please just respond back.
Read 34 days ago
Y/n, I see you reading my texts. Just please let me apologize.
Read 33 days ago
Do you still want that car? I know you told me to not buy it but I’ll order it without a second thought if you talk to me. Please.
Read 32 days ago
Okay, Im sorry about the car thing. That was weird. I don’t think you’re a prize to be won with money. I just want you back.
Seen 31 days ago
Stopping by your house today, I need to see you.
Seen 29 days ago
Im sorry. I can’t loose you y/n. I cant.
Seen 27 days ago
My mom is so mad at me. I dont blame her, loosing you is like loosing half of my heart.
Seen 25 days ago
Its been so long since I’ve lived without you I dont know how to do its
Seen 23 days ago
Please love me again.
Seen 22 days ago
I know you see these. Do you enjoy seeing me like this?
Seen 19 days ago
I love you.
Seen 16 days ago
No other person will ever count to me. That stupid bitch at the bar is nothing compared to you. None of them are.
Seen 15 days ago
I left a letter under your mattress. Please read it.
Seen 12 days ago
Coming to your house tomorrow, I really need to see you. I’ll do anything.
Seen 9 days ago
The notes still here, you really break my heart. You know that?
Seen 8 days ago.
I still love you.
Seen 5 days ago
Ill fucking never look at another girl again. Swear.
Seen 4 days ago
I love you even more today
Seen 2 days ago
Whenever you’re ready.
Sent just now.
It was true, you read every single text. You read them almost 10 times over. You weren’t ready to respond.
At first, Bakugou’s texts confused you. This was against his pride. He would never suck up to you like this. So you laid it down to drunk, sad, sleepy, and/or desperate texts. It wasn’t his character so naturally you went looking for answers.
The last month has been terrible for you too. You were staying at your bestfriends house, who was GLAD to have you.
You avoided everything that mentioned him. News, certain social media platforms, public areas, etc. if it wasnt for your friend, you wouldve never gone out.
After that last text he stopped reaching out for the coming months. Things were peaceful, you were okay.
You hadn’t gone back to any club/parties since the incident. But your friend, being a party person, forced you out to a nearby club. They also made you agree to going with this guy, whatever his name was, to have a little blind date. Your friend figured it’d been a couple months and you needed to touch some bitches. You were against it, still getting over Bakugou, but they used the favor you owed them to seal the deal.
So now you found yourself at the club, chatting with a guy at one of the booths. He was actually tolerable, not your type romantically, but someone you’d be friends with. You supposed that the first step to a relationship was being friends so you continued to persue.
He was rather handsome too, not godly handsome like your ex- you needed to stop doing that. Comparing everyone to Bakugou is whats gonna make you single for life. Bakugou was not an easy man to pass.
You laughed at his joke as he continued to tell it. “Yeah man, she was crazy! She ended up calling my mom and telling her that I had set the house on fire! My mom was worried to death! Then she hit me after she found out the house was okay like I told her!”
You shook your head, “Exes man, I swear!” He leaned down towards you, “You got any exes that make you want to start a war?” You immediately nodded, “My last ex was a handful.” “Did he tell your mom you set the house on fire too?” You laughed, “Nahh, thatd be so much easier to manage. My ex, well, he-“
Prying red eyes watched you from the corner of the room. Bakugou didn’t even wanna come to this club tonight. He was, like you, forced to come out of pity of his friends. To think he could’ve missed the chance to see you and this guy flirting and laughing together.
It could be a close friend, maybe a relative, he didnt know. He wasnt close enough to make oht a single word. There was some part of him that aas glad for that nad another part that was incredibly annoyed.
No matter who it was, Bakugou’s hands started to smoke up. His teeth gritted hard against eachother. While he was moaping and suffering you were over here on what looks like a date?
It took everything in him to not just stomp over there and drag you away from the piece of shit. He was glad he hadn’t enough alcohol in him to follow those urges… to a degree.
So he waited. He waited for an opportunity. And he sure as hell got one.
“Oh!” You gasp at the ringing of your phone. You tilt the screen towards you before looking back up at your date with apologetic eyes. “Sorry, I absolutely need to take this!” He laugh, “its okay!” His back cracks when he lifts his arms to stretch. “I needa go to the restroom anyway!”
You smiled that smile that he loved. The smile that should only be directed at him. Not at some random guy you just met.
He stalked carefully behind the guy until he was walking into the back hallway with him. The guy barely had a chance to comprehend a single thought before he was slammed up against the wall with his shirt fisted by the blonde.
The man looked startled and freightened. Who wouldnt be? Bakugou’s stare was one to rival Medusa’s. He felt frozen by the pure hatred glazed over.
“What the hell are you doing with y/n.” The sentence came out between his teeth. The man put his hands up defensively, “Aye man, we’re just on a blind date!”
Bakugou’s palms sparkled threateningly, “Im gonna give yoh one chance,” He leaned down to be exactly in the guys face, “Fuck. Off.”
That was all the guy needed before he was out of the door and on his way home. An immediate wave of relief washed over him at the thought of the date finally ending. The positive emotions quickly disappeared at the sound of a famiiar voice, his favorite voice. “Seriously?”
He snapped his head over to look at you. You were even more heavenly up close, just as he remmebered but better. Your arms were folded and you looked at him with such disapproval that he wanted to immediately crawl to his knees and apologize.
“We’re not even fucking dating anymore. You just chased off my date.” He winced, “Fuck.” You scoffed at his curse to whomever. “I should be saying that not you. Leave me alone, asshat.”
Before he could stop himself he had grabbed your arm and pulled you into the closest vacant guest room. He pinned you against the doorway. You were wide eyed and your mouth slightly open. It had happened in an instant, so fast your brain was still trying to comprehend him grabbing your wrist.
Bakugou bit his lip so hard you thought it would bleed. He didn’t know were to start. This day had been rehearsed in his mind over and over again. Yet the words, the speeches, and the numerous i love you’s were gone.
“Im sorry.” Was all he could get out. Your eyebrows furrowed when he mumbled the words. He snaked his hand around your waist as he whispered in your ear. “Im sorry. Im sorry, swear on it y/n. Talk to me again. I miss you. I’m sorry.”
His head dove into your neck, kissing and sucking on every sensitive spot he gained access too. You didnt even have time to gasp before his thigh pried both your legs open. He grinded the muscle against you.
It took everything in your being to not just give in and let him pleasure you. The resolve in your head, the one that told you that him acting like this is conmmunication is what ended the relationship in the first place, slapped the hell out of you though.
His face broke as you roughly pushed him away. He whimpered while trying to trail his hands on his belt to unbuckle it.
The skin of your palm met his face quickly. He completely stopped this time. The sound of the slap reverbing in his head along with the sting. Not just the sting of the slap, but the sting of knowing he fucked up again.
“Have you learnt anything?!” You yelled, tears brimming in your eyes. “This is the reason we broke up! You can’t resolve everything with sex!” You jammed your finger into his chest, “Start thinking with your head instead of your dick! After all this time, I thought you changed. Im so ignorant.”
You turned to leave out the door. Bakugou saw everything flash before his eyes. He saw the relationship you and him had before. He saw the relationship you could have now. And he saw the relationship that fucked up and now has fucked up his life.
“I dont know HOW!” He didn’t mean to yell, really. But something just snapped in him. You stopped to listen so he continued. “I’ve spent the last several weeks missing you. I never even realized how much I fucking… damn it!”
The knot in his throat was getting tighter. You hadn’t turned around yet. “But I just dont know how…” His voice broke halfway through the sentence. He wrapped his arms around you. You felt no lustful intent, only the desire to hold his #1. “I only know how to show my love through fucking. I can be more open! I just dont know how!”
He started to shake, squeezing you even tighter. After a long while, you finally spoke.
“Then I’ll teach you how.” He looks up in bewilderment, is this you forgiving him? In one swift movement you pushed yourself towards him. You grabbed his worried face, tilting him up to look you in the eyes. He was panicked, a panick you’ve only seen a few times since knowing him. “But for now, tell me how you feel in the ways you understand.”
He seemed confused when your hands encircled around his belt and snagged it off. “What? Wait-“ you cut him off with a hefty palm on his clothed cock. His breath caught into his throat. He barely chocked back the moan that you attempted to tear from him as you dove your hands under his pants. He was puzzled, yet his arousal and the feels of your hands encircle around his throbbing cock hypnotized him.
Instinctively, he reached between your legs to rub you in return. He whined when your hand gently pulled his away. “I’m okay, you just focus.”
Easy for you to say, he thought, or atleast tried to. It wasn’t easy to focus on the situation when you began to pull his cock out and rub it against your entrance. It felt too good. It had been too long. Too long having to rub himself out to a picture of you. The real deal felt euphoric.
His hips bucked into yours, starting at a brutal pace. He picked up your legs to give himself more range. The sounds of skin on skin were loud, not as loud as the combined sound of the moans and groans you both chocked out, but loud.
He tilted his head back, his whole chest was flushed a deep red. He cursed into your neck where he had begun to lick and suck. “Damn it, I-I missed you.” Your whole body tensed when he angled himself to hit that spot deep inside of you. It was your turn to curse.
“I just- these past couple of weeks- nghhh… ive been- I cant live without you alright!” His thrusts picked up, “I regret everything I have ever done to make you upset- hhhnnm…”
Tears well up in your eyes when you start to reach your orgasm. You weren’t gonna last long either. Like him, the sensation was a lot after being away from eachother so long. He had forgotten his strength as he thrusted into you so hard you wouldn’t doubt if angry bruises were already forming.
“Katsuki… I love you,” You whined desperately. He started to unwind, tensing and untenseing, when you came around his cock while moans spilled through your mouth. It almost hurt how stong the orgasm was. Almost.
He bite into his lips so hard it began to draw blood. “Fuck, I love you too y/n! So fucking much!” With that he exploded inside you. His hot seed painted your walls without missing a single spot.
He slowly lifts you down to your feet, only to stabalize you when your knees buckle. He wrapped his arms around you, “I fucking missed you.” You breathed in deeply when he kissed at your temple, “I missed you too Katsuki.”
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