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#SVU angst
cissyenthusiast010155 · 2 months
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Holding on For Me ~Rita Calhoun xFem Younger!Partner!GradStudent!Reader (feat. Rafael Barba)
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Summary— Rita gets hurt badly and ends in the hospital. Her two closest people, you and Rafael, come running. But you’ve never met each other, and now your partner’s and his best friend’s life hangs in the balance…
Mommy… Master List
Requests & Prompt-List
Warnings: angst, then fluff, heavily implied physical assault, hospitals, near death experiences, bruising, implied scarring, crying, hyperventilating, implied anxiety attacks, happy fully ending, etc.
Enjoy (;
You rubbed your temples with a sigh as you stared at her dull computer screen and flipped the pages of your extensive notes. You was violently pulled out of your doctoral thesis research by the sound of your cell phone ringing. Eager for a distraction, you swiftly picked up the phone.
“Hi this is is Y/N!”
“Hello Ma’am. I am calling from Mercy Hospital, I have you listed as an emergency contact for one Rita Calhoun?”
Your heart dropped. Rita? What had happened? Was she okay??
“What happened? Is she okay??”
“She was brought in about 30 minutes ago… She’s currently in surgery, pretty banged up. I am just making my rounds and contacting her emergency numbers in case.”
“Ok thank you so much, I’ll be there in 15 minutes” you hastily replied.
As soon as the call had ended, you jumped up from your chair, your heart racing and your mind spiraling. You scurried around her apartment, collecting things that you or Rita might possibly need at the hospital, throwing all the miscellaneous items into a bag before storming out of the apartment. You were swift to hail a cab once out on the city streets, eagerly giving the address of the hospital. Was Rita going to be okay? What if they lose her before you got to the hospital?
The words hospital and surgery made your stomache sink. Your hands felt like they were going numb, and your mind seemed to only be able to come up with the worst possible scenarios on what could have happened to Rita. You bit at her lip anxiously, and you closed her eyes for the rest of the cab drive, too overwhelmed to bear the stimulus of sight at the moment. Did this have to do with Rita’s job? Maybe an ex-client or someone who’d threatened her? What was the last thing she said to Rita…??
As soon as the cab stopped outside of the hospital, you paid the driver and rushed inside the bustling ER doorway. You immediately found a nurse and asked about Rita, who led you to the waiting room for trauma surgery, a separate, more secluded area of the hospital. The nurse had not been able to tell you much, besides the fact that Rita was still in surgery. So you anxiously paced the little waiting room, biting your fingernails and feeling like you wanted to cry. ‘Pretty banged up’, how badly was her partner hurt? Why were you the only one here??
Memories of you and Rita flooded your mind. You remembered when you two first met, it was only a couple years ago, but you had grown so close since. You thought of all the late nights that you two had spent together, laughing and drinking until both of you couldn't keep your eyes open anymore. You remembered how much Rita worked, just how passionate she was about her job. And now in a matter of 15 minutes that could all be ripped away from you? Rita taken from so swiftly, so cruelly?
You approached the nearest nurses station and asked about your partner again. As you were trying to pry any and all information out of this poor young nurse, a man stormed into the waiting area. You had the slightest sense that she knew him from somewhere, but as he was pacing the room furiously, muttering certain choice words in Spanish, you couldn’t quite place it. Then the man came up to the desk where you were standing and spoke. What if these were Rita’s last waking moments…? How could you live with yourself if Rita didn’t make it…?
“Hi. Do you have any information about Rita Calhoun and how she’s doing?” The man asked rushedly.
Now that he was right next to you and after revealing he knew Rita, it clicked for you. This was Rafael, Rita’s best friend from her college years. The two had never formally met, you had seen a picture or two of him in Rita’s apartment (from the many nights that you’d had dinner and stayed over) and you had only heard about Rafael when Rita elected to talk about him. You knew that while they were good friends, there were wounds in their personal pasts, so you never pushed to meet him. Had Rafael and Rita ended on good terms in the last time they talked? Did he know if this was work related…??
“You’re Rafael…” you managed to breathe out.
You were surprised that you had even been able to get out one word with the lump in your throat. Rafael turned from the counter to face you, giving you a quizzical and slightly defensive look. How could this have happened? It had been going all so well, and now with a simple call, life has turned upside down…
“Yes. And you are?”
“Y/N. Rita’s partner.”
Rafael’s brows raised and his eyes glistened with intrigue. He seemed to decide that you were alright, because he sent you a confirming nod, before going back to grilling the nurse for more information. Had Rita been threatened…? Attacked? Taken??
Trying desperately not to cry in front of him or the hospital staff, your knees suddenly began to feel weak. Before you could catch herself, your legs buckled and you collapsed on the cold, hard, hospital floor. Rafael was quick to turn back towards you, giving you his hands to help stabilize your overstimulated state. Your weak form managed to make it to one of the waiting room seats, where Rafael promptly sat next to you. It was then that you noticed how much your entire body was shaking. Rita couldn’t die… No, she couldn't die… It just… She couldn't it…
“I… I didn’t know Rita had a partner.” He stammered aloud, breaking the silence of the two of you sitting in the hospital, both equally nervous wrecks.
You shrugged in response, not having the wherewithal to respond to that at the moment. Silent tears finally began to stream down your face, as you started to let it all out. You curled forward, holding your head in your hands as you sobbed for what felt like hours. How would you ever be happy again? You would never move on. You couldn’t. Rita was your everything… You couldn’t face losing her…
“I don’t know what I’ll… d-do if… If Rita…” you stuttered, not able to finish your statement, as your voice returned to choked sobs.
You felt a soft and gentle touch on your back, making you uncurl and meet Rafael’s own reddened gaze.
“Rita is one of the strongest, hard ass people I know. Ever since school… I have never seen a fighter quite like her. If anyone will make it, it’s her.”
“Thanks” you croaked out.
Awkward silence took the room, the only sound being the hustling and bustling of the hospital. Rafael eventually removed his hand from your back, as it began to feel like he was overstepping. But the second you lost that touch, you seemed to only feel worse.
“Do you know w-what h-happened…? Or w-why…?” You stammered out in a whisper.
Rafael leaned forward, his forearms coming to his knees with a heavy sigh.
“I know that she’s been facing scrutiny and backlash for the last case she took. but besides that I don’t know…” he breathed out.
You pulled your knees up onto your chair, wrapping your hands around your body for some semblance of control and comfort, as you let out a shaky sigh.
“S-so it is work related…?”
“I don’t know, Y/N, I’m sorry… Truthfully, I hadn’t talked to her since she took that case, I was the lead prosecutor and we… we had a bit of a fallout over it…” Rafael gritted out.
His defensiveness seemed to have vanished, all that being left being the vulnerable, close friend of Rita’s. His knuckles were white from how hard he was squeezing his hands.
“Christ the last thing I probably did was yell at her to get out of my office…” he confessed, looking down to the ground with shame and guilt.
“I… I can’t even r-remember what the last thing I said to her was…” you choked out through violent sobs.
Rafael looked up at your wailing and his hand came out, caressing your shoulder lightly. He squeezed your trembling form reassuringly.
“I’m sure you told her how much you loved her…” he softly comforted you.
“I don’t know… I d-don’t know…” you changed in a whisper, starting to rock back and forth anxiously in the seat.
“Hey. Take some deep breaths… She’s going to be okay.”
Your glossy eyes met his reddened ones and you two just connected. All because of Rita. You were so grateful that she had found a friend like Rafael. And Rafael was grateful that she had someone like you to support her as a partner. Suddenly you were both drawn back to the crushing reality by a nurse coming up to you with a file in hand.
Rafael immediately stood and walked right up to her, demanding answers. You couldn’t get yourself to stand, so you merely looked up at the two standing adults with pleading eyes.
“Are you family?”
You both nodded vigorously.
“How is she? What happened?? Can we see her…??” Rafael demanded.
“EMT’s responded to a Good Samaritan call who found her in an alley… The ambulance brought her here to Mercy and she’s been in surgery ever since. It was a little touch and go, she has a concussion, multiple lacerations, a four broken ribs, scattered bruising, and a shattered left forearm…”
Your mouth went dry at the nurses words and you couldn’t think as tears began to stream down your face once more. Your lip trembled as you bit it, attempting to stifle your sobs.
“Can we see here??” Rafael immediately asked.
“Yes you may see her, she’s finally out, and she’s somewhat awake. I’ll take you to her, But take it slow, she has a long road to recovery…” the nurse said.
Rafael let out a sigh of relief and he quickly turned to you. Extending his arm, he helped you up and down the hall towards Rita’s private room. The nurse let you in, closing the door behind the two of you.
Rita looked peaceful for a moment, lying in the bed, but as she began to wake up, pain flooded across her face. Practically all of her exposed skin was bruised and battered, the biggest being her black eye. Her eye widened as much as she could widen them at the sight of you and Rafael.
“Holy fuck…” Rita winced in pain as we tried to sit up.
You immediately rushed next to her, sitting at the edge of the bed. The older brunette leaned back again, giving up the idea of sitting up properly for her moment, instead meekly attempting to reach out to you with her right hand, and you eagerly met her more than half-way, taking her hand and kissing it over and over again as tears of joy steamed down your cheeks.
“Rita Rita… God I’m so glad you’re okay… How are you feeling…?” you whispered, continuing your love and tender assault on her hand.
“Hi baby… I’m… in a whole lot of fucking pain, but I’ll live…” she breathed out in confession.
Rita smiled lightly back. But even that seemed to hurt her, as she winced lightly again. Rafael was standing at the end of the bed with his hands in his pockets as he watched the two of you. His eyes softeners watching your dynamic, he scolded himself for being so goddamn stubborn. Because if he hadn’t been, Rita might have introduced him to you…
“Oh Baby don’t move, stay still. Doctors orders you need to rest. Don’t want you getting more hurt…” you pleaded caringly and with much love.
“She’s a stubborn hardass. Doctor’s orders won’t stop her…” Rafael teasingly cooed, meeting Rita’s gaze.
Rita rolled her eyes at her closest friend.
“Shut up, you idiot… Now come over here and hug me.” Rita shot back with the same teasing tone.
Rafael chuckled, looked down to the ground as he made his way around to the opposing side of the bed, releasing his hands from his pockets, the man leaned over and gave his friend a proper embrace.
“I’m sorry, I’m so sorry… I’m so glad you’re alive” Rafael whispered to Rita, before retracting slightly, but staying close and gazing at her caringly.
Rita wanted to cup his cheek and pull him close, tell Rafi that it was all good, but her drugs were at a heavy dosage and soon they began to pull her back into unconsciousness.
“It’s… okay Rafaellll…—” she mumbled before dozing off.
Your gaze then met Rafael’s, coming to an understanding that neither of you would be leaving anytime soon.
~~~
Rita Calhoun Masterlist ~Coming Soon (;
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youdoknowwhotfiam · 27 days
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Olivia benson x fem!reader
FREE PALESTINE
Angst
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(Credit to owner)
The scent of burnt coffee and regret hung heavy in the air of Olivia's apartment. Two years. Two whole years had passed since the fight, a stupid, petty argument that escalated into a chasm Olivia never thought you'd willingly jump into. You called her a workaholic, her nights spent hunched over case files a constant reminder of how little time she had for anything else. You, with your fiery spirit and infectious laugh, deserved more than that. Olivia, in a fit of exhaustion and frustration, had thrown it back, words laced with the bitterness of a job that chipped away at her soul piece by piece. "Then maybe you should find someone who has time for you!"
You slammed the door on your way out, the echo of it reverberating in Olivia's ears long after you were gone. She called, texted, left desperate messages on your voicemail, hoping, praying you wouldn't disappear like smoke. But disappear you did. No forwarding address, no trace on social media, your phone number disconnected. You vanished like a ghost, leaving behind a gaping hole in Olivia's life.
The days blurred into weeks, weeks into months. Olivia threw herself into work, the familiar sting of righteous anger and the hunt for justice a poor substitute for the warmth of your hand in hers. She saw traces of you everywhere – in the coffee shop where you always ordered your extra-sweet cappuccino, in the park where you used to steal glances at the stray dogs, in the bookstore where you'd lose yourself in detective novels. Each time, a jolt of hope would momentarily flicker, only to be extinguished by the crushing reality of your absence.
Then came the call. It was a cold, rainy November night, the city slick with the first kiss of winter. Elliot's voice crackled through the line, a raw urgency in his tone. "Liv, you gotta get down here. Warehouse raid. Russian mob. We found girls."
Olivia's throat went dry. Human trafficking. It was an all too familiar story, a stain on the city's soul. But the case didn't register fully, not yet. All she could think about was girls, young lives stolen, innocence shattered.
The warehouse was a desolate, concrete tomb. The air hung heavy with the metallic tang of blood and the despairing whimpers that echoed from behind the heavy metal doors. Olivia and the team kicked them down, a cacophony of shouts and flashing lights filling the cavernous space.
The girls were everywhere. Huddled in corners, eyes wide with terror, their bodies frail shadows under layers of grime. As Olivia moved through the room, a primal instinct kicked in, a fierce protectiveness that burned through the years of jaded detachment. She knelt before a young girl, barely a teenager, tears tracing dirty streaks down her pale cheeks. The girl flinched instinctively, eyes downcast.
"It's okay, sweetheart," Olivia murmured, her voice soft and soothing. "We're here to help you now."
A gruff voice interrupted. "Liv, you need to see this."
Elliot stood by a makeshift bed in a back room, his face grim. Olivia followed his gaze. There, on the threadbare mattress, lay a figure draped in a tattered blanket. It was you.
The blood drained from Olivia's face. Your face, pale and gaunt, was framed by matted hair. Your once vibrant eyes were closed, your breathing shallow. A choked sob escaped her lips. How? Why?
Elliot noticed her reaction, his eyes instantly filled with understanding. "We need to get her to the hospital," he said, his voice gruff but kind.
The sterile white of the hospital room felt like a slap. Olivia sat by your bedside, a vigil kept through the long night. Machines beeped rhythmically, a constant reminder of your fragility. Hours turned into days, and finally, your eyelids fluttered open.
Confusion clouded your gaze for a moment before recognition dawned. Your eyes widened, a flicker of fear giving way to disbelief. "Olivia?"
Her voice was a hoarse whisper, but to Olivia, it was a symphony. "Yeah, it's me. You're safe now."
Tears welled up in your eyes, spilling down your cheeks. You tried to speak, but your voice was weak. Olivia leaned closer, catching your words.
"You left," you rasped, your voice tinged with accusation.
Olivia flinched. "I..." she started, the words catching in her throat. Shame and regret were a bitter cocktail in her mouth.
"Don't," you cut her off, a flicker of your old fire returning. "Just... tell me what happened."
It poured out of her then, a torrent of words – the fight, the desperation, the months spent searching for you. You listened in silence, With a tear slipping down her cheek, Olivia reached out and grasped your hand, her touch sending a jolt through you. The years of separation melted away, replaced by a raw vulnerability that left you breathless.
"I was so stupid, Y/N," she whispered, her voice thick with emotion. "Work consumed me, and I took you for granted. I never thought you'd leave."
You squeezed her hand back, a silent understanding passing between you. The hurt of the fight was still there, a dull ache in your chest, but seeing Olivia like this, broken and filled with remorse, softened the blow.
"I said some pretty awful things too," you admitted, your voice barely above a whisper. "I shouldn't have stormed out like that."
Olivia's eyes met yours, a flicker of hope igniting within them. "Can you ever forgive me?"
The question hung in the air, heavy with unspoken longing. You looked at the woman you once loved, the woman you realized you never truly stopped loving. The past two years had been a nightmare, a desolate wasteland devoid of her warmth.
Taking a deep breath, you reached out and tucked a stray strand of hair behind her ear. The gesture was small, intimate, a silent promise.
"I already have," you murmured, your voice thick with emotion.
A choked sob escaped Olivia's lips as she leaned forward, burying her face in the crook of your neck. Tears streamed down her face, hot against your skin. You held her close, whispering words of comfort, the silence of the hospital room broken only by the soft beeps of the machines and the rhythm of your intertwined breaths.
As the days turned into weeks, you recovered slowly, your body healing alongside the fractured pieces of your relationship with Olivia. The nights were filled with whispered confessions, apologies, and the tentative rebuilding of trust. You spoke about your ordeal, the horrors you witnessed at the hands of your captors, the despair that threatened to consume you.
Olivia listened patiently, her arms wrapped around you, a silent shield against the encroaching darkness. She held you close as you cried, her presence a source of strength and solace.
When you were finally released from the hospital, Olivia took you back to her apartment. It felt different, the emptiness replaced by a sense of cautious optimism. There were nights you'd lie awake, the echo of the past lingering in the air, but Olivia was always there, a comforting presence by your side.
One evening, as you sipped tea on the fire escape, the city lights twinkling below, Olivia turned to you, her eyes filled with a newfound determination.
"We'll get through this, together," she said, her voice firm. "You and me."
You met her gaze, a smile gracing your lips. "Together," you echoed, the simple word holding the promise of a future rebuilt, stronger and more cherished than ever before. The fight that tore you apart had left its scars, but it had also shown you the strength of your bond, a love that even the darkest of nights couldn't extinguish.
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ncis-nerd · 1 month
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long cases
Ship: Olivia Benson x Fem!Reader
Warnings: Angst, Hurt/Comfort, SA mention and description briefly, cuddling, pet names.
About: A case gone wrong leaves y/n upset and to make matters worse, y/n can relate to the case so she blames her self but her girlfriend, liv, provides a shoulder to cry on and consoles y/n.
"cmon baby, stop being so shy. it's just me. just mommy, sweetie. lemme see your pretty face, hm?" liv cooed, in attempts to get her little lovie out of burying her face into liv's shoulder. y/n slowly begins to pull away, her teary-eyes met liv's. "Oh honey.." liv sighed sadly. she knew that this last case had taken a toll on y/n. it went so wrong and liv can tell y/n is blaming herself. "livie" y/n's voice broke. the fragile girl began to sob, covering her face with her fingers to spare liv the effort of attempting to console her. there was nothing liv could say to change the outcome of the case but what liv could do, was talk to y/n about it. liv knows that y/n was abused sexually in the past so this is why she relates to this case so deeply.
A few minutes passed, liv was giving y/n the space to cry and let it all out before talking to her. Y/n stood limp in liv's arms, tears stopped flowing. Y/n began to trace circles on liv's back. Liv took this as a sign that y/n was in a slightly better state. "Honey?" Liv gambled. Y/n hummed in reponsed. "Are you ready to talk about it, my love?" Liv asked, not removing the girl from her lap just in case. Y/n and Liv had this agreement that they'd always talk about it. If someone was bugging the other, they would not let it cause an argument or fight. To talk about it and dispute the problem before it gets worse.
Y/n scooted over, leaving some space between the two, but not much. Y/n clutched onto liv's hand, not that liv minded. She knew it helped y/n to talk, grounded her. Knowing that liv was real and she would be okay eventually. "I think the reason this case is getting to me so much is because this has happened to me. Not this exact situation but I was SA-ed. A-and I've told you about it briefly but..." Y/n's voice broke, drawing intense circles on liv's hand. With her other hand, liv reached out to rub y/n's back. Giving her a hint to breathe. Y/n takes a deep breath in response, getting the hint. Liv fixated on y/n's story, nodding at her to continue when she's ready.
"P-part of me wished someone had came to save me, but no one ever did. It got worse but you know what? I grew up, and got the hell out of there." Y/n exhaled, feeling a huge weigh lifted off her chest. "That's right my love. What you experienced, is horrible, I have no words. But you're right, you got the hell out of there and I'm so proud of you for that. Shows how strong you are, look how far you came. You help people everyday, you are amazing, my gorgeous, generous, girlfriend." her voice softened with affection.
Y/n let out a soft giggle in response. Liv, obviously confused, gives y/n a puzzled look in response. Furrowing her eyebrows. "That all started with g's, I just thought it was funny." Y/n squeaked in a happier sounding voice. "Oh? Hm? Funny am I?" Liv pushed, climbing onto y/n, trapping them beneath her. Y/n raised an eyebrow towards Liv. Liv attacked y/n with tickles. "l-livie!" She squealed. "How funny am I now? Hm, sweetheart?" Liv teased. Y/n squirmed beneath her, out of breath "l-liv i can't breath!!" Y/n giggled. "Oh, can't you now baby? " Liv inched closer towards Y/n, pressing her lips against y/n's.
Liv fell beside y/n, her hand caressed y/n's face. Their eyes met, and y/n leaned into liv's touch. "I love you so much, babe." y/n whispered quietly. "you are so perfect, angel." Liv whispered in response. They gazed at each other with nothing other than love. They laid in silence, clutching onto one another, falling asleep tangled up in quiet.
a/n: like, reblog and comment for more!!
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svuobsessed · 2 months
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SVU team X Autistic Victim teen reader
Literally started watching Law and Order SVU yesterday and fell in love with the show well the sixth season at least.
This will be my first ever L&O SVU one-shot.
Summary: The team are called in after a Teen was beaten up by two other students.
Third person pov...
The smell of the hospital woke Y/N L/N up, they had always hated the smell of the rooms it made their sensory issues skyrocket.
Opening their eyes they are meet with bright white lights, groaning they close their eyes again, sitting up carefully being mined full of their injuries.
Slowly the teen opens their eyes again, this time the light was not as bad, Y/N looked around the spacious room, the teen was alone in the room.
They could not remember anything, rocking slowly trying to calm down they wracked their brain for something but could not remember. "Stupid stupid, what the hell happened to me" they shout smacking their head as they started to freak out.
As they were having a meltdown the doors opened and in came Detectives Olivia Benson and Elliot Stabler. "Y/N what's wrong sweetie?" Calls Olivia as they rushed over to the teenager.
Hearing voices they did not know made Y/N look up and crawl out of their bed as they stood searing pain shot through their head groaning in pain they wobbled; Olivia grabbed the teen to stop them from falling.
Instead, they struggled in her hold trying to get away from her. "Stop let go off me" they yell eventually Oliva let them go. The teen crumpled to the floor against a wall rocking back and forth hands in their hair trembling all over.
Olivia and Elliot look at each other. "What the hell happened there?" questions Elliot watching the distraught teen work they way through a panic attack. Suddenly the doors opened it was Y/Ns parents, outside the room they answered the twos questions. "Y/N is autistic which is why they reacted that way, the new room and new people triggered them into a meltdown" explained Y/Ns dad as he held his wife.
Crying the woman looked at the two detectives "what happened to our child, why where they attacked" she cried, Olivia and Elliot look at each other before telling the two.
During Y/Ns 4th period lesson they left the classroom for a breather as they got overwhelmed, as they did the teen was followed by two students. 15 minutes later the two students walk back joking and shoving each other in the hall, Y/N know where to be seen.
Lucky for them the janitor was passing by and found them unconscious and beaten up, at the end both Y/Ns parents wanted to press charges but could not without Y/N present.
Days later Y/N had woken up again in the hospital this time a lot more calm and not as anxious. The 13 year old was sat up in the bed, they had a bandage wrapped around their head their attackers got in a few good swings to their head.
The teen also had bruises on their arms, they had tried to protect themselves from the attack though being surprised, the door to Y/Ns room opened the teen turned their head, it was the detectives from before.
Sitting up they continued to look off sideways as the two detectives approached the H/C Haired teens bed. "Hi Y/N, I'm Olivia this is Elliot" she introduces them. Y/N does not look at them but nods.
Elliot looks at the teen and stands closer. "Y/N we wanted to ask some questions about the day you were attacked?" he asks the teen, sighing the teen turns their head to look at the man.
"I didn't see their faces" they whisper, the adults could tell they were lying by the way their voice cracked, the two detectives eye each other before Olivia sits next to Y/N on the bed.
"that's a lie sweetie and you know it" she tells them gently, Y/N looks up at her tears in their E/C eyes. "I know, I can't tell I won't" they cry hands shaking in their lap. Olivia holds out her hand to the teen as an invitation to hold hers.
Two both hers and Elliots surprise the teen grabbed her hand squeezing tightly as they cried.
The team are stuck at the precinct Benson, Stabler, Tutuola and Munch all stand around the evidence board in front of them, it was filled with pictures of what happened to Y/N, the footage of the two students.
"That poor child, who in their right mind would beat someone for being different" says Munch as he stares at a picture of Y/Ns injuries pissed off. "Your right partner, little shits" Fin pats the man's shoulder.
On the desk next to them stand Olivia and Elliot. "If only we could persuade Y/N to tell us their attackers" says Elliot slamming his hand down on the table, Oliva sighs and looks at the forage. "We can't push the, they are already traumatised enough" as the team stand around someone pats Elliots back.
This scares the man; he had not heard any footsteps telling him someone was there. Turning around he was shocked at who was there. "Y/N" the name made the others turn around.
Behind Elliot stood their 13 year old victim, the teen had numerous bandages around their arms and head, headphones around their neck and a small stuffed toy. "I'm here to report an assault" the relief on the faces of the detectives is seen.
Olivia stands from her chair and beckons the teen over. "Come on sweetie, I'll take you to an interview room" she takes the teen to an unused room, the teen looks around and sets their bag and stuffed toy on the table.
Munch and Fin are disgusted at how the arseholes beat up Y/N, turning to Elliot they see a pissed of look on his face. "Those bastards" growls Fin, Munch agrees "they deserve to be locked up for good" he says, Elliot follows after Y/N and Olivia.
Hours later Y/N had told the two everything that had happened to the over the past year, they had been beaten up before by the same kids but not so bad they had to go to the hospital, lucky for Y/N both attackers were charged with category 1 of grievous bodily harm with 26 month in juvie with 100 hours of community service.
Y/N was more than happy with the charges, their parent profusely thanked the SVU team for their help.
The end!
I plan to skip most of the court parts because I know nothing about how they work so sorry I only really know about the kind of charges you can get, anyway sorry for any grammar and spelling mistakes.
Requests are open!
Word count: 1171
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i-got-ur-nose · 7 months
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Two Slow Dancers (Last Ones Out)
Rafael Barba x Reader
Warnings: angst, hurt/comfort, mentions of alcohol, mentions of a hospital setting, everything is very vague tho lmao
(this is a vent LMFAO)
((sorry not sorry <3))
She could smell the bourbon on his breath when he let her in. Her eyes tracked the way that his jaw clenched and then unclenched— something he did to calm himself down whenever he was on the brink of losing his composure.
This time was different though.
It wasn’t some insolent witness that was just getting on his nerves or a criminal that was too difficult for even him to handle. No. This was different. It was her that was causing him to act like this.
Only she could rile him up in such a way that he was itching to break something. Her and her eyes. Stoic and masked— he loathed to love her eyes.
“You promised that this guy wasn’t going to walk.” she reminded evenly. Rafael scoffed, meeting her gaze with a very specific kind of annoyance.
“Would you like to become the Assistant District Attorney and see for yourself what it is I have to do everyday?” The venom in his voice was clear as day.
“You promised—”
“I know what I promised.” He hissed, bristling anger she had already been trying to stuff down.
“If you would just—”
“Why so you can make me feel worse about myself?” Her mouth dropped open, face radiating nothing but heat.
“You promised—”
“Sometimes promises can’t be kept!” He shouted, cutting her off. The volume of his voice had grown to something that she had never heard before. Her eyes drifted from his screwed shut ones and down to his hands. The tremors were visible from where she sat.
Without saying a single word, she stood up from the leather chair he kept in the corner of his office and glided to the space right in front of his desk.
Right in front of him.
He still had his head down, his shoulders so tense that she was sure he was going to turn to stone. A knot formed in the middle of her chest, threatening to choke her from the inside out. She opened her mouth to speak but he beat her to it.
“You,” He said roughly before taking a deep breath a meeting her eyes. The watery green almost knocking the wind out of her. “You are the single most important thing to me in the world.” His breathing was coming out harder than before. “Nothing else.” He waved a hand in front of his body, the other still holding him up over his desk.
“I-”
“Please let me finish.” He cuts her off again. She swallows thickly, but nonetheless nods for him to continue.
“I messed up. I got too close— too personal.” He admits. “When I saw him, all I saw was you in th-the hospital and I…” He breaks himself away from the train of thought forcefully.
“I fucked it and I’ll never be able to forgive myself for it. But I swear to God, hermosa…” the nickname springs tears to her eyes. “The second the chance is mine, I’ll take it. He’ll never see the light of day again.”
She nods, trying to blink back the tears.
“Can I go now?” She tries to quirk a half-assed smile. Rafael huffs a dry laugh but nods.
“You promised me that he wouldn’t walk.” She started off and Raf looked like he had just been kicked in the gut. “But that means nothing if you aren’t by my side.” She was glad that she was able to get that out before the tears that she had tried so hard to keep down fought their way down her face.
Rafael crossed to her in two strides, crushing her in a hug that could have fed her for a thousand years. One of his hands cradled her neck so carefully into his shoulder, while the other was wrapped firmly around her waist.
“I’m so sorry, baby.” He whispered into her ear, softly kissing her temple over and over again. “I’m so sorry.”
She held his face in between her hands and smiled sadly, but not a single ounce not loving.
“Never be sorry for being my hero.”
A single tear made its way from Rafael’s eye and down his cheek. She brushed it away, kissing the skin that it had touched. They were going to be okay.
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cabensqn · 1 day
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When I wake up, I'm afraid
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Somebody else might take my place
When I wake up, I'm afraid
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Somebody else might end up being me
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narcissuslecter · 12 days
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hey babes, it's me, your fave internet menace, will graham smokes truther, writer who has been writing again but very slowly!
i've been crazy busy with work and life but i have also been watching sooo much svu and i started watching house so like... house/hilson fics soon??
anyways, on the writing side of things, i've been writing like a beast but im also self critical as ever so it's a fight! but baby we got as needed chapter 3 coming up soon, some angsty carisi for all u svu babes.
for u hannigram babes we got fics for u too, bunch of songfics bc unfortunately, it's what i do best. lots of music, lots of messy power dynamics, lots of smut <3
and don't think i forgot about u criminal minds babes, there is some stuff in the workssss.
all that rambling aside, send me headcanon reqs, send me asks!
be gay, see u next time <3
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benslerandolitzlove · 3 months
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Is there an EO fanfic where grown adult Dicky is going off on Liv in front of his siblings, Noah, Bernie, and Elliot and accusing her of sleeping with his father while he was married to Kathy for all those years. And Elliot finally setting the record straight and going into great detail about how Liv saved his marriage time and time again and was damn near the reason Kathy and him was still married up until she died. Also letting Dicky know Eli exist because of Olivia and that she was a second mother to all of his kids because he and Kathy couldn’t be the parents they needed and she stepped in repeatedly because she didn’t want his marriage to fail even though it killed her year over year that she couldn’t have him.
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x-bluefire-heart-x · 4 months
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What Could Have Been
So....Sorry?
This is a massive angst piece, requested by @nickamaro with the prompt "I won’t be able to buy you that ring, but I can buy you enough time to get out of there" So I hope you all enjoy my first fully angst with no comfort fic.
Nick Amaro/Gender Neutral Reader
Warnings: Death, violence, mention of injuries and blood, guns. Extreme sadness.
Master List
Prompt list
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You had no idea how you and Nick had gotten into this situation and you honestly had no idea how to get the both of you out it. The sky was getting dark as the sun started to set taking away any of the warmth you were feeling. You could hear the consistent dripping of water somewhere that was driving you insane. The only thing that was making it bearable was the warm body next to you, but at the same time you were terrified about the fact that Nick was beside you. You would give anything for him to be anywhere else then here, if anything happened to him you knew your whole world would never be the same.
“We’re going to be okay,” Nick kept whispering his hand squeezing yours when you heard footsteps coming your way again. Your eyes snapped to Nick as you held your breath fear making your blood go cold, you could feel the sweat on Nick’s hands his body tense as if he wanted to move in-front of you but knew that any movement would draw their attention to where the two of you were hiding.
“They have to be around here somewhere,” you could just make out the sound of a mans voice.
“We’ll find them, they can’t hide for long,” a reply came a little more muffled as the footsteps receded until you couldn’t hear them at all.
“Nick,” you whispered, you could only make out his face in the wanning light due to how close the two of you were. “We have to get out of here.”
“We will, the others know we went to check out a lead, when we don’t report in they will come looking,” Nick said, his voice so sure as he raised your joint hands to his lips and kissed your knuckle. “I promise I won’t let anything happen to you.”
“Or I you,” you leaned forward, quickly kissing his lips. A faint memory surfacing in the back of your mind.
--
“Nick, we have to go,” you giggled as the man in question continued to kiss at your neck his arms wrapped tight around your waist holding you to him.
“No we don’t,” he mumbled. “Today is our day off. And I do not plan on letting you out of my arms, amor.”
“But we should do something,” you whined, your voice more breathy then you wanted as he started to kiss across your shoulders and his hands moved to hold your hips.
“We are doing something, cardio,” Nick teased. “Come on please, this is New York there is always something on. We can spend the morning in bed, just the two of us and then in the afternoon or even the night, depending on how many rounds we go, we can do something.”
You wiggled enough to be able to roll over to look at his big brown eyes as he stared down at you, his lush lips in a pout. You rolled your eyes, groaning as the man knew exactly what he was doing to you. His lips pulling back into a knowing smirk as he felt your body start to relax back into the bed. He rolled on top of you, slowly grinding his hips down in into yours as he kissed along your jaw and down your neck.
“I hate you,” you muttered your hands raising to grab hold of his waist as you spread your legs wide to cradle his hips.
“No you don’t,” Nick said into your neck as he nibbled at the skin.
“No I don’t.”
--
You inched closer to Nick, ears straining to hear any movement from the people hunting you. Nick let go of your hand to wrap it around your waist pulling you as close to him as he could get you. He nudged his nose against your temple, pressing a kiss there with his eyes squeezed shut. His breathe hitched a little as you put pressure on his ribs, you backed away not wanting to hurt him.
 “It’s fine,”
“Nick, your ribs are probably broken,” you argued moving away so you were only lightly touching his side. “If I put too much pressure on them I could make the break worse, and it could even puncture your lung.”
Nick lent his head back against the wall the two of you were leaning against. His face was pale, and although he was trying hard to pretend he wasn’t in pain you could see it in the lines of his face. The two of you had been together for so long that there wasn’t much he could get past you, or you him if the squeeze on your hip was anything to go by.
“I’ll be fine, Carino.”
You nodded, not knowing what else to do. You were unsure of how much time had past but your body was starting to ache from being in one position for too long, the cut on your thigh had finally stopped bleeding but the throbbing coming from it worried you. It had been a while since you had heard anything from the two suspects, you hoped that meant they had completely moved on.
“It’s been quiet for a while, maybe we could try and sneak out?” you suggested.
“It’s better then staying here and waiting for them to find us,” Nick agreed. “We go slow and quiet.”
“I’ll take the lead,” you said, voice leaving no room for argument. “I’m quieter and I have better hearing.”
You could see Nick having an internal debate but the logical part of his brain must have won out as he nodded, though he didn’t look happy about it. You both struggled to stand up, Nick wrapping an arm around his ribs and you limping. You slowly moved out from the gap you had been wedged in, taking it slow to ensure no noise was made. Once the two of you were out in the open, you paused for only a moment to make sure they weren’t coming before you set off down the hallway. You had been checking out a rundown abandon house that was half demolished when you had been attacked by the suspects. They had managed to get the drop on you both, your guns getting lost in the struggle as Nick’s ribs were broken and your leg was cut. You felt Nick’s hand lightly grab onto the back of your jacket, to prevent the two of you from getting lost and separated.
The two of you moved in sync, your feet barely lifting from the ground to limit the amount of noise you made. You very carefully checked the ground in front of you for any debris that could trip you or that would make a noise if stepped on. You paused at every corner, peeking around it and looking down each side, only moving on once you were sure it was safe. As the two of you got closer to the exit the more confident you got until you heard the sound of footsteps approaching from behind. And they were coming up fast, light from torches jolting around as the two ran.
“Shit,” you whispered. “We need to move quicker.”
“If they already know where we are there is no reason to be quiet,” Nick suggested. “I don’t think we are far from where we entered this place, I say we run for it.”
You nodded, knowing that your leg would hate you after the adrenaline wore off but you knew that this was your only chance. The two of you gave up moving quietly and ran. Your thigh throbbed in time with the impact of your feet hitting the ground and as you stumbled over debris. You could hear Nick’s harsh breathes as running jarred his broken ribs and you just prayed that it wouldn’t damage them more. Behind you, you could hear the yells and shouts of the suspects as they heard you running, you ignored the pain as much as you could and just focused on getting out. You were just thankful that they didn’t have any guns.
You could see the outline of streetlights just ahead of you, you felt a little bit of hope growing. If you could just get out, you could get to your car,  it sounded like the suspects were still a far bit behind you. The light from their torches was hitting your backs but their footsteps didn’t sound any closer.
BANG.
“Ah!” you felt a sharp pain hit your arm and you stumbled even more.
“Amor!” Nick called out his hand taking a gentle but firm grip on your upper arm to keep you from falling as he tugged you around a corner, away from the exit but out of the line of fire as more bullets flew past and embedded into the walls.
“Fuck, I guess they found our guns,” you laughed. You felt around the wound thankful that it seemed to be a flesh wound, though a little deeper than a normal one.
“Baby, are you okay?” Nick gripped your face getting close to see you.
“Yeah, I will be, it’s just a little deep flesh wound,” you assured him gripping his forearm and squeezing. “This makes things a little trickier.”
You could see warring emotions cross Nicks face before his jaw clenched as that familiar look of determination won out. You blood ran cold as your stomach clenched in fear, your heart beating fast.
“Nick,” you whispered, worried about what that look meant. “We’re going to get out here together love, this place is half demolished and run down. Surely there is another way out that keeps us out of their sights.” You tightened your hold on his forearm as his eyes started to glisten as tears filled his them. Nick pressed a gentle kiss to your lips, his hands stroking down your cheeks, before dropping to hold your waist as he rested his face in the crook of your neck, his favourite place.
“I won’t be able to buy you that ring, but I can buy you enough time to get out of there,” Nick whispered his voice heavy with the tears you could feel hitting your neck. Your heart plummeted at his words, eyes filling with tears that quickly fell down your cheeks as your chest started to heave.
“Nick, Nick no,” you shook your head as he lifted his head away and stepped out of your hold, easily shrugging off your grip. “Darling, no we will get out of this together and you can buy me that ring, and we can have the most sickening proposal that ever happened. So sickening sweet that Finn complains about a tooth ache.”
Nick tried to smile through his tears, a huff of a laugh leaving him at your words. His heart broke to see you crying but he knew that if he didn’t do something to get you out of this the pit in his stomach would be worse and it would never go away. He had to do this. You were his absolute world, his heart and his soul. You had to live, even if he didn’t.
“I love you mi amor,” was the last thing he said before he sprinted back in the direction you had just come from, reaching down and picking something up. You could just make out him throwing it up the hallway the lights were coming from before the sound of gunshots filled the space. You tried to call after him but your voice caught in your throat as sobs racked your body, as the light from the torches followed Nick, neither of the suspects looking back your way.
You hesitated for only a moment longer before you turned around and ran. Looking for any sign of light from the outside so you could leave this fucking place and get help. Your phones had been broken in the altercation at the start. You just prayed that the team was looking for you and was able to get some kind of location from your phones before they broke. You prayed that you continued to hear the gunshots as that meant Nick was alive.
You heard the sirens and saw the flashing lights just as you managed to break down a window and crawl out of it. The glass cutting into your skin but you ignored the stings.
“Help!” you cried out, voice breaking and clogged. “Over here! Please, help!”
“Y/n? Nick?” You heard Amanda’s voice calling out for the two of you.
“Amanda!” your fear for Nick allowed for you to scream as loud as you possible could, your throat hurting as you continued to scream and shout. The gunshots in the building behind you had stopped, and you prayed that that didn’t mean Nick was…gone. You collapsed just as Finn and Amanda rounded the corner. You sobbed harder pointing into the building.
“They have our guns, Nick…” you couldn’t continue, Finn nodded at Amanda and lead some of the SWAT team into the building, using an opening that was just a few metres down from the window you crawled out of.
“Are you okay?” Amanda asked her torch rolling up and down your body spotting the blood on your pants and shirt. You shook your head finding it hard to breathe, you wouldn’t be able to until you heard news about Nick. Amanda wrapped her arms around you and tried to get you to stand and get you around to the front where some ambulances were waiting.
You heard more gunshots echoing behind you and Amanda’s radio crackled to life.
“Officer down! Officer down!”
“No,” you whispered your heart breaking as your vision blacked out.
--
You awoke to the smell of chemicals and cleanness. A hospital. Your body ached, your thigh and arm throbbing a little but you weren’t in so much pain that you couldn’t handle it. A hand was gripping yours and your heart sped up.
“Nick,” your voice was croaky and your throat hurt. You must have damaged it a little from the screaming you had done. Your eyes slowly fluttered open the grit in them making them dry, and the lights from the hospital hurt them at first until they adjusted.
“Hey,” the voice that came from your side was definitely not Nick’s and as you became more aware you realised the hand holding yours was smaller and the callouses were different. Liv. You turned your head to look at her, bracing yourself. And you felt your heart shatter again, into tiny little pieces as you saw her bloodshot and puffy eyes. She had been crying, hard.
“No, no, no,” you begged her, tears welling up in your eyes again as your chest heaved.
“I am so sorry,” Liv whispered, her face etched with sadness as her voice broke at your devastation.  She moved to sit on the edge of your bed, the hand not gripping yours tightly reached up to stroke at your hair.
“Please Liv, please,” you continued to beg. The sight of you broke her heart, she started to sob with you. “Tell me he wasn’t alone, please?”
“Finn was with him,” Liv promised you. “And he, he left a message for Finn to give you.”
“I want to hear it,” you whispered. Liv opened her mouth but closed it after she searched your face for something. She nodded.
“I’ll go get Finn,” she said, standing up and releasing your hand.
“Stay, after Finn comes in?” you asked her and Liv could never deny you anything. “And Amanda?”
You knew Nick and Amanda had been close and you wanted your family around you and you didn’t want her to be alone if Finn and Liv were in here with you. Liv just nodded leaning down to press her lips against your forehead before she stood back up and left the room. You entire world was muted, the colours didn’t look the same and you knew they never would again. Nick had been your everything, he had taken a large piece of you with him and he would have it for eternity.
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bensonsbobblehead · 1 year
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Stand Still 
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Pairings: Olivia Benson x Daughter!OC
Olivia Bensons daughter dealing with post op alone or so she thinks. 
 Content warnings: ANGST! Abortions , sex, sexual assault, lots of sadness, basically things that would be talked about in an episode. 
wc; 1.2k
[masterlist]
“Ryann Benson?” The nurse called softly from the door. The door Ryann had been staring at for the past two days in a row. This was it, she was doing it, alone.
The young women stood up walking quickly to the door as she turned her phone off. With her head hung low hoping no one in the office would remember her face. 
It’s freezing she thought as the nurse led her to a room and ordered her to take off her clothes. The nurse gave her and gown and left the room. After what felt like forever she returned with a million questions. 
Are you sure this is what you want? Is there anyone you need me to call? We can stop at anytime. Do you have someone to take you home? 
Ryann was on autopilot, she hated she was in this situation. It wasn’t entirely her fault Justin couldn’t take no for an answer so she just gave in. Which she knew her mother wouldn’t be proud of.
Maybe if I would’ve fought harder, he didn’t technically force me, I just gave up on saying no. 
Tears grew in her eyes as she thought about what happened. How he denied it was even his and blocked her number, leaving her completely helpless. She had to be strong, she had no choice. 
Before she knew it was time, Doctors and nurse flooding in with gear and equipment. 
“Just breathe for me” the doctors said as he begun. Ryann cried and breathed and cried again, the pain of it all was unbearable. 
“Is there anything you need sweetie?” The nurse asked holding her hand. 
My mom 
“No” Ryann whispered back wishing time would fly pass so this can all be over. She felt violated all over again. Exposed for everyone to see it was humiliating, all she wanted was her mom. To be there with her through all of this, but she couldn’t.
Olivia always knew how to soothe Ryann whenever she needed to. She’s her baby girl and quite frankly she’ll do anything to see her smile. 
When the procedure was over they gave her a change of clothes, medicine, and sent her on her way. 
She felt like she was hit by a bus but she had to hurry home. Ryann called an Uber and paid her extra to help her up the stairs, it was the least she could do. 
When she got into the apartment it was completely silent. No Olivia, no Noah, just Ryann and her thoughts. She walked to her room and laid down immediately. Stuffing the Planned Parenthood bag almost all the way under her bed. The girl dozed off finally getting some rest. 
—-
“Ry please answer the phone sweetie, I love you”
Olivia left her 4th message to her daughter. Ryann was Olivia’s oldest, she was a responsible girl but sometimes Olivia worried about her. Of course, she was a woman living in this world, how could she not worry. 
Ryann had told her she’s been with her friend since the weekend and she didn’t need to worry. But Olivia felt it in her soul something was up. So, she called Ava, Ryann only friend honestly.
“Hi Ava, I was wondering if Ry was still with you? She hadn’t been returning my calls”
“Hey, and no she actually went home early on Saturday you haven’t seen her?”
My daughters missing
“Thank you Ava” Olivia hung up and quickly called Amanda to her office. 
“Ry is missing, I need .. I need someone to trace her phone and her bank cards and I have to go get Noah” 
“Olivia, relax we are going to find her” Amanda reassured the woman heading toward the team and briefing them. 
Olivia sat in her office wondering how she let her guard down when it came to them she was always on top of it. She wanted Ryann to have more space even if that meant not talking to her everyday. She wondered how she not notice that she was missing.
“Captain” Amanda said from the office door causing Olivia to look up, “You’re going to want to see this” Amanda sat the laptop on her desk showing her daughters latest purchases. The top one being the very pricy one with the words Planned Parenthood next to it. 
“I need to find my daughter now” Olivia stood up grabbing her belongings heading towards the elevator.
The first thing Olivia thought was why would her own daughter want her there for this. It did not matter that her daughter was pregnant but it was about her protection. Making sure there through whatever Ryann had to face. 
When she arrived at the apartment she noticed her daughters shoes and headed toward her door. Knocking softly and getting no response she peaked in. 
Seeing her daughter buried under the blankets holding Little, the stuffed cat her uncle Elliot gave her when she was 9. Olivia walked in trying not to wake her, looking around the room for anything to help her understand what happened. As she moved closer to the bed that when she seen the planned parenthood bag. Filled with papers, pads, aftercare, and an outfit. 
“What happened sweet girl” she whrispered trying not to wake the girl but failing. Ryann turned over to see her mother standing there with the bag in her hand. Tears grew in her eyes fast, “Mama I —“ she said quickly sitting up. Before she could finish Olivia was already taking off her shoes and climbing into bed with her. 
“What’s going on Ry, talk to me” As she held her trying to give her the upmost comfort. Olivia took a look at her daughters face and she looked exhausted, Olivia hated this. 
“Justin and I were making out and it started getting intense and I didn’t want to have sex yet — but he begged even after I said no a thousand times. 
 I gave up and just let him. I didn’t want to do it and now I’m here” she was hysterical, “Please forgive me mama, I shouldn’t have even been doing anything. It’s all my fault.”
Olivia had felt like she was punched in the chest. Her daughter was a … victim. 
“I’m here for you now Ryann, I’m never going anywhere.” Ryann cried even harder, tears falling all over her mother. It 
It took Olivia 30 minutes to calm Ryann down before she spoke up. 
“I’m sorry I didn’t tell you, I didn’t want you to know I was weak or for you to hate me for even thinking about sex.”
Olivia knew Ryann was a strong, creative girl and he could never hate her. Ryann brought a light into Olivia’s life and it’s been shining bright ever since.
“Look at me, I will never hate you and Ryan you are so strong. he’s the weak on. I wish I was there to hold your hand and be by your side through all of this.” 
Ryann cried harder all she wanted was her mom, she was her role model. Disappointing her was the last thing Ryann wanted to do. 
“It was your choice and I have no right to question that and I absolutely don’t hate you. You’re a part of me Ryann Serena.” 
Ryann snuggled into her mom, tears still falling from her eyes. Ryann had wished she called her mom to come with her to get the abortion
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atlafan · 1 year
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Violet Chemistry - Part One
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In the criminal justice system, sexually based offenses are considered especially heinous...the dedicated detectives who investigate these vicious felonies are members of an elite squad known as the Special Victims Unit. These are their stories.
a/n: I’m posting part one here, and the rest will be on my patreon. A few disclaimers: I am not promoting copaganda. I have simply re-watched 22 seasons of Law and Order: SVU and I wanted to write my own thing based off of the main characters Elliot Stabler and Olivia Benson. If you’ve never watched SVU some of this is going to be very confusing, but I tried my best to explain things so you wouldn’t necessarily need the SVU background. Harry is basically Elliot, and Ronnie is basically Olivia. I am not an expert on the criminal justice system or special victims, I simply used the information from the show to create this story. So much of this fic is probably inaccurate.
Warnings: THERE WILL BE MANY TRIGGERS IN THIS STORY! The words rape, homicide, pedophilia, murder, etc are used throughout this fic. If these things deeply upset you or trigger you, please do not read this story. Mentions of cheating, domestic violence, and other upsetting content is also intertwined throughout this story. Again, if these are things you don’t like, then please don’t read it.
Words: 6.6K
Main Characters: Detective Harry Styles, Detective Cameron (Ronnie) Walsh
Tumblr Masterlist I Ask I Patreon Masterlist
“RONNIE!!”
It all happened so fast. Harry did the one thing he shouldn’t have: he ran to help his partner instead of chasing after the perp.
“SOMEONE CALL A BUS, NOW!” He screamed to the vice squad behind him while he added pressure to where Ronnie was bleeding out.
The EMT’s got to her as soon as they could, and when they told Harry he couldn’t ride with them to the hospital due to the severity of the wounds, but he went ballistic and they backed off, letting him into the back of the ambulance. The only people he listened to were the nurses at the hospital that told him he couldn’t go into the operating room. That’s when his captain caught up with him.
“I’m not leaving the hospital. Not until I know she’s alive and breathing.”
“Harry-“
“I don’t want to hear it, Cap.”
“Harry.” The captain yanked him aside and made him look at him. “You haven’t even asked about what happened to Jones. Did you forget what you’re on the payroll for?”
“Of course not.” He has tears rolling down his cheeks, but he’s so angry he doesn’t even realize. “I know I fucked up, but I saw Ronnie go down, and-“
“The chief is going to want you two separated after this.”
“I figured.” Harry looks away from him.
“I’m going to have the doc talk with both of you. You both need a psychological evaluation. Then a decision will be made.”
“Your decision or the chief’s?”
“Mine. He trusts my judgement. But I need to make sure I can trust both of yours.”
“Fine.”
“You still haven’t asked about Jones.”
“Respectfully, Cap, right now I don’t give a fuck about that piece of shit. Reynolds and Miller were there too, and since they’re not here worrying over Ronnie the way that I am, I’m assuming they caught Jones, or they’re down at the DA’s office waiting for arraignment.”
“They did catch him.” The captain nods.
“And the other underage girls? We only got a few of them out.”
“Found in one of his broken-down trailers, alive. Miller’s contacted their parents, they’re on their way here now. We had them sent right here so they could be checked over.”
“Obviously.”
“Don’t give me attitude, Harry. I’m giving you a very small, brief pass since Walsh is your partner, but that doesn’t mean you’re not on thin ice.”
“Heard, Cap.”
“Excuse me, Detective Styles?” A nurse taps him on the shoulder. “You’re listed as Cameron Walsh’s emergency contact, so I’m allowed to give you the particulars of her surgery. Who is this?” She nods towards the captain.
“Our captain, he can listen. She’d want him to.”
“Okay. Four bullets were removed from the body. Two were in her chest, one in her left shoulder, and one was lodged in between her ribs. The doctors were able to get them all out, but she’s in a medically induced coma.”
“What, why?” Harry’s eyes widen with panic.
“She started seizing from the blood loss. The doctors felt it was necessary.”
“So, when will she wake up?”
“When her body lets her. They’re still getting her stitched up and bandaged. They’ll be taking her to a private room shortly. Once she’s set up, I’ll come get you.”
“Alright, thank you.” The nurse walks away, and Harry takes out his phone.
“Are you texting Mark?”
“No.” Harry scoffs. “I’m messaging Reynolds and Miller that Ronnie’s alive.”
“Don’t you think you should contact Mark?”
“I don’t want him here, so no.”
“That’s not up to you. He’s her boyfr-“
“I know what he is.” Harry snaps. “I’m her emergency contact, not him. Get a clue, Cap.”
“That’s strike two, Detective. Check yourself.”
A little while later, Harry rushes to the room that’s been set up for Ronnie. He stops short of the doorway. It’s scary seeing her hooked up to all the machines. He steps in slowly, sitting on the edge of the bed. He takes her hand in his and gives it a gentle squeeze. She has a few scrapes on her face, but nothing serious. He looks at how messy her hair is, and it makes him laugh softly.
“You’d hate the way you look right now.” He stands up and pulls an elastic off his wrist. He props her head up just enough so he can pull her hair back into a French braid. “Remember when you first taught me how to do this? Katie was about three, and Kathleen was on vacation with her girlfriends so I was on double parent duty. I was father of the year for being able to braid Katie’s hair the way Kathleen usually did.” He sighs and ties the end of her hair with the elastic and sets her head back down. He pulls a chair up so he can sit by her. “Don’t worry, Ron, I’m not going anywhere. I’m not leaving you.”
**
Five Years Earlier
“Styles, I’d like you to meet your new partner, Detective Cameron Walsh.” Captain Sellers smiles as the other detectives crowd around to say hello.
“I go by Ronnie, hi.” She smiles as she shakes Harry’s hand.
“Nice to meet you. You’re joining us from homicide, yeah?”
“Mhm. I’ve always wanted to work in SVU, so I jumped at the chance when the position opened up.”
“You wanted to add rape and kiddie porn to your murder, huh?” Harry smirks and Ronnie grins at him.
The two clicked instantly. Harry took Ronnie out for a drink that night so they could get to know each other better, and so he could give her some tricks of the trade.
“I’ve been in special victims for four years now. It never gets easier. There’ll be cases you take extremely personally, but you have to try not to. I still do it sometimes, it’s tough not to picture these things happening to your own family and friends. In homicide, all your victims are dead, right? Well, in special victims, more often than not, they’re alive. It’s hard when you have to make someone relive a rape, or having to listen to a child talk about how someone they trusted took advantage of them.”
“You’re saying things I already know. I’ve been trained on all this. I’ve dealt with families and friends of victims. A lot of it is the same. Compassion and relating is important and more effective than accusing the perp.”
“Exactly. You might find yourself having to pretend to agree with a pedophile. It’s the worst, but-“
“It’s worth it if we can get an admission.”
“Yup.” Harry takes a sip of his beer. “Alright, so, what made you want to join special victims? You said you always wanted to work in this unit.”
“I…this is something I didn’t even tell my last partner, but…I feel like we’re really forming a bond here, so…I’m the…product of a rape.”
“Jesus, I’m sorry.” He leans in so he can listen to her better.
“I’m lucky in that my mother didn’t treat me like scum. I know it was hard for her sometimes, but for the most part we had a good relationship.”
“Had?”
“She died last year. Sclerosis of the liver. She coped by drinking.” Harry goes to open his mouth, but she stops him. “Don’t say you’re sorry again, it’s alright.”
“Do you know who your father is?”
“No. When I was younger I wanted to know because I hated that I came from someone that could do something so heinous to someone else, but recently…I don’t know, it doesn’t bother me anymore that I don’t know who he is. I just hope he didn’t ruin anyone else’s life.” She takes a sip of her own drink. “What about you? Why are you in SVU?”
“I sort of just fell into it. I’m tough enough to handle the perps. I’m good with kids. I actually just had one of my own. Well, my wife had her, but you get what I mean.” He takes out his phone to show Ronnie his lock screen. “That’s my wife, Kathleen, and our baby girl, Katie.”
“Oh wow. How old is your baby?”
“She’s six months.” He smiles fondly down at the picture. “Kathleen was my high school sweetheart. We broke up when I served. I was a navy seal. When I came home we got back together and got married. Best decision I ever made. I love being a family man. My household was so fucked up when I was a kid. I like knowing I’m providing a positive environment for my daughter.”
“That’s amazing. How do you make time for them? This job can feel never ending sometimes.”
“You have to build in those boundaries. Obviously we have to keep working until the job is done, but when the captain tells you to go home, just go home. You can’t do your job right if you’re exhausted.”
“True.” She nods.
“Try to do as I say and not as I do. Cap and I butt heads on the regular. I have a temper. Most of the time I can keep it together, but sometimes I lose it. It depends on how much the perp is pissing me off.” He looks her up and down. “Anything else I should know about you?”
“You mean other than the fact that my mother was a rape victim? No, I don’t have any other skeletons.” She smirks, and it makes him laugh.
“I’m glad you can joke about those things.”
“It helps make the job more bearable at times.”
“Sure does.”
The two went on to work very well together. Ronnie got to meet Harry’s wife and baby. Kathleen would often come see Harry for lunch if it was a paperwork heavy day.
After a year on the job together, the two got close. Ronnie was having trouble in her personal life. That is, her love life was nonexistent. One afternoon, when they were sitting in the car as they staked out a perp, Ronnie asked Harry for some advice.
“Can I ask you something personal?” She says.
“Depends on what the subject is.” He says as he continues looking out the window.
“Sex.”
“I’m listening.”
“I can’t get aroused.” She tells him bluntly, causing his head to snap in her direction. “Any time I even think of dating, I talk myself out of it. It’s like…it’s like my mind goes to the worst possible place. I think every man is going to try to take advantage of me, or that they’re playing me, buttering me up. Did you ever have trouble when you first started in special victims?”
“Oh, yeah. I couldn’t get it up for like three months.”
“Really?”
“Yeah. Kathleen was ready to kill me. I mean, I’ve got a mouth and hands, but it got to a point where when I’d get between her legs I’d get flashes of the gruesome shit I’d seen.”
“How did you move past it?”
“Talking to Kathleen, and time. When was your last date?”
“I don’t know, a year.”
“You haven’t had sex in a year?”
“I guess not.” She shrugs.
“And you haven’t taken care of things yourself?”
“I told you, I can’t get aroused. I can’t even watch porn anymore because I keep thinking all the girls are underage and are being forced into it.”
“So, nothing gets you even a little wet anymore?”
“Harry.” She sucks her teeth and shoves his shoulder.
“I’m not going to tell anyone, I never tell anyone what we talk about. Partner confidentiality.”
“I’m as dry as a bone.”
“You need to, I don’t know, do something for yourself. Like, light some candles, take a bubble bath, use a new vibrator, or something. Kathleen has this one toy that-“
“I don’t need to know about the toys you and your wife use.”
“You know, Miller is single, and I know for a fact he thinks you’re cute.”
“I know he does, but I don’t shit where I eat.”
“Not even for one night?”
“Nope.”
“I can ask Kathleen if she has any single friends, we could go on a double date.”
“I’m all set.”
“Do you have a problem with my wife all of a sudden?”
“What, no. I just don’t think we should necessarily combine those areas of our lives. You’re always saying it’s important not to bring work home with you. Getting too familiar with your family would be a bit much.”
“Just say you don’t want to hang out with me, I’m a big boy.” He rolls his eyes.
“You’re annoying.” She shoves his shoulder again, making him chuckle.
“In all seriousness, it just takes time. Don’t force yourself. When you feel like giving it a try with someone, you’ll know. You’ll feel that familiar zip of electricity go through you. You’ll be drenching your panties again like you never stopped.”
“Jesus fucking Christ, Harry.” She laughs so hard she snorts.
Harry always found a way to make Ronnie laugh.
But things weren’t always so funny. By the time Harry’s daughter was two and a half, Kathleen kicked him out of the house. She was sick of him not putting the family first, and he was sick of her not understanding that with his type of job he can’t always do that. He had been pissy at work for a while, and when he finally snapped at Ronnie while they were working a case, she snapped back when they returned to the squad room.
“Don’t ever talk to me like that again.” She says to him. “I don’t need you making me look bad in front of the perps.”
“Then do your job correctly.” He crosses his arms over his chest.
“I was. Whatever your problem’s been lately, get the fuck over it. I’m your partner, don’t treat me like it’s my first day on the job.”
“Kathleen and I separated.”
“What?” Her features soften.
“Kathleen and I separated last month. Not legally, but I’m living in my old apartment that I had been subletting.”
“What happened?”
“I wasn’t being a good enough father and husband, according to her. So, now I get to see my daughter even less.”
“You should ask Cap for some time off. You and Kat have been together forever, you’ll get past this.”
“I don’t know, something’s different this time.” He runs a hand through his hair. “She thinks I prefer spending time here…with you.”
“Oh please.” Ronnie groans. “That’s so cliché. She knows nothing’s going on between us. I’d never break up a family.”
“So if I wasn’t married with a kid you’d be okay with breaking us up?” He smirks, and she shoves his shoulder. “Sorry, I shouldn’t be joking right now. She thinks I have better communication skills with you than with her. But that’s only because any time I’d tell her about what was going on at work she’d stop me halfway through because she didn’t want all the details. Eventually I just stopped talking about work at all. Turns out, we just don’t have anything left to talk about.”
“That can’t be true.” Ronnie frowns.
“I think it is. I just want to do right by Katie, she’s my top priority. That’s the one thing Kathleen and I are agreeing on right now.”
“I hope you know you don’t have to keep something like this from me. I’m not a blabber mouth.”
“I know, it’s just embarrassing. I fucked up, and I didn’t do anything to stop it.”
“This is a tough job, and it’s even tougher to have a family to go home to. I can’t imagine the stress that causes.”
“Every little kid we come across, all I can think about is what if something like that happened to Katie. I won’t be able to protect her forever, and it kills me.”
“Did you explain that to Kathleen?”
“Of course I did! We went to therapy for weeks, but I didn’t say all the things she wanted to hear. She’s done.”
“Let me take you to dinner later. We can hit up the Chinese place, have some drinks, and…just turn our brains off for a while.”
“You don’t have to do that.”
“Would you rather go home to an empty apartment?”
“No.” He smiles softly. “Alright, Chinese and drinks after work. Thanks, Ron.”
“No thanks necessary.”
Ronnie wanted to jump for joy, which made her feel terrible. She has nothing against Kathleen, but she’d be lying if she said she didn’t have feelings for Harry. She knows it’s dumb to fall for your partner, but they spend so much time together. He knows her in a way that no one else does. She loves him. She’s in love with him. She’s not going to press her luck, but maybe after some time without Kathleen, Harry will realize that if he and Ronnie do things right, they could be together. It’s not totally uncommon for detectives to get together, and it’s certainly not against the rules. She catches him looking at her sometimes, she knows this isn’t completely one sided.
**
Harry got shot. It’s not the first time, and it won’t be the last. But this time around, he realized what was really important to him: his wife and his daughter. After he got out of the hospital, he went home. He just wanted to see Katie. He got to tuck her in and read her a story, and when he was done with that, Kathleen asked him to stay. He wasn’t going to say no to that.
**
Ronnie can’t read Harry. Which is strange because she can always read him. He’s been antsy lately. He’s constantly checking his phone, his mood goes from hot to cold in seconds.
“Hey, can we talk?” She asks him, and they both go into the bunk room for some privacy.
“What’s up?”
“That’s what I was going to ask you. You’ve been weird lately.”
Harry sighs heavily and runs a hand through his hair. “I wasn’t going to say anything for at least another month, but Kathleen’s pregnant.”
“I’m sorry, what?”
“My wife is pregnant.”
“Who’s the father?”
“Um, me.” He says, completely offended.
“How could you be the father? You’re not even living together.”
“That’s the thing, we’ve been working on reconciling.”
“Since when?”
“Since I got shot a few months ago. I went over to see her, and I asked if I could come home. We’ve been going out on dates, doing things as a family again. It’s reignited our spark.”
“So, you got shot, then went and fucked Kathleen?”
“Yeah.”
“What are you guys gonna do?”
“What do you mean by that?”
“I just…do you think it’s a good idea to bring another kid into your situation? How long could these good times last? We both grew up in fucked up households, you know how bad it is. Why would you want to put another kid through that?”
“I can’t believe you’re even suggesting Kathleen have an abortion. She doesn’t want that.”
“How do you know? Did you ask her? How does she feel about it?”
“We’ve always wanted more than one kid, of course she’s fine with it. She’s really excited to be pregnant again.”
“Are you two at least back in therapy? I mean, have things changed? Are you being a better husband and father this time around? Or do you only care now because she’s pregnant?”
“Don’t interrogate me, Ronnie.”
“I’m not trying to! But you’re not thinking rationally about this, Harry. Do you really want to make things work with Kathleen after these last seven months?”
“See, this is why I didn’t talk to you about this.” He shakes his head.
“What does that mean?”
“It means, you wouldn’t understand the trials and tribulations of marriage. For fuck sake, Ron, I’m the longest relationship you’ve ever had with a man!” Her mouth falls open at that. “Whatsamatter, baby, you can dish it but you can’t take it?”
“You’re an asshole.”
“Oh, you’ve wounded me.” He puts his hand over his heart, mocking her.
“How could you even say something like that to me?”
“It’s the truth. You can’t make any relationship work. I’m the only guy in your life you trust. Maybe you should go to therapy.”
“You know what, from now on, let’s just keep our personal lives private. I won’t ask you about yours, and you won’t ask me about mine.”
“Works for me, partner.”
Ronnie makes an exasperated noise, and huffs out the door. She nearly runs over Kathleen.
“Kat, hi!”
“Hi.” Kathleen smiles softly. “Were you just in there with Harry? Alone?”
“Yeah, we needed to have a private discussion. He told me the good news, congrats.”
“You look thrilled for us.” Kathleen rolls her eyes.
“Look, I’m not saying it’s not a blessing, but I just think-“
“Walsh.” Harry’s low voice bites through the air. “Don’t you have some paperwork you need to get done?”
“Don’t you know you can’t tell me what to do? We’re the same rank, you prick.” She walks away from the two of them. She needs to clear her head.
**
After taking a month off for paternity leave to help Kathleen with their new baby boy, Harry returns to work. It’s hard leaving his three favorite people, but he knows he needs to get back to SVU. This time around, he’s going to set limits where he can. He’ll take a break to go home for dinner, then come back to work if he needs to. He’s not going to screw this up a second time.
Harry checks in with his captain first thing, then catches up with Reynolds and Miller. He looks around for Ronnie, but she’s not there. He figures she must be out on assignment. But much to his surprise, she comes walking into the squad room with a cup of coffee in one hand, and a man by her side. She’s giggling and has rosy cheeks. The man walks her over to her desk. She sits up on top of it, and he leans down to speak in her ear, making her smile. She nods and kisses his cheek before he leaves. Harry approaches her with a smug look on his face.
“I leave for a month and you already have a new man in your life?” He jokes, and she hops off her desk to hug him.
“Welcome back, Styles.” She gives him one more squeeze before letting him go. “I missed you.”
“I missed you too, Ron.”
“I’m sorry I never came to the hospital, or to the house…I didn’t want you to think of work while you were away.”
“That’s alright, I’ve got tons of pictures to show you.”
“What’s his name?”
“Eddie.” He smiles fondly. “Edward, actually, but we’re calling him Eddie.”
“I like that.” She smiles.
“So…” He sets his jacket down and loosens his tie a little. “Who’s the guy?”
“He’s our new ADA.”
“What happened to Timmins?”
“She got offered a better salary with homicide.” Ronnie shrugs. “His name is Mark Hayes. We butted heads at the beginning, but we ended up going out for drinks one night and one thing led to another.”
“What happened to not shitting where you eat?” Harry smirks at her.
“I’m not, he’s at a completely different table. It’s not like we see each other all the time. He has other cases he’s working, you know?”
“Isn’t it a conflict of interest for you to see our ADA?”
“We disclosed things with, Cap. We figured all that out. It hasn’t affected either of us at work.” Her cheeks start to redden, and Harry’s eyes widen.
“And after work?”
“I’m sorry, Detective, but I’m afraid that’s diving a bit too deeply into my personal life.”
“Ah.” He nods. “That bad, huh?”
“What?” She laughs.
“If he was any good at fucking you, you’d tell me about it.” He leans his bum against the desk, standing closer to her. “What’s wrong, he can’t make you come?”
“The opposite, actually.” She turns, getting right in his face. “It’s the best I’ve ever had. In fact,” she looks around to make sure no one else is listening, “I’ve recently found out that I can squirt.” She watches as Harry’s eyes visibly darken, his pupils turning into saucers. His jaw clenches and he stands up straight. “Welcome back, partner.”
**
Flash forward two years later. Harry’s divorced, but still occasionally fucks Kathleen when he’s desperate and just wants something familiar. It’s hard not to get riled up with emotions when he’s over spending time with his kids. Ronnie’s been seeing Mark the entire time. He’s asked her to move in a dozen times at this point, but she always comes up with an excuse as to why she can’t.
Harry and Ronnie are currently sitting in Cap’s office. They think they’re in trouble. For what, they’re not sure, but it’s usually not good when they both get called in for a chat.
“I have an important assignment for the two of you. It’s going to involve being undercover for a bit.” Cap explains.
“Alright, what’s going on?” Harry asks.
“We’ve had a string of strippers getting murdered. They all work at the same club. Narcotics tipped me off. They’ve been working the case because the perp running the entire operation is the one giving the command on which girls are getting tossed. It happens infrequently enough that it hasn’t raised a ton of eyebrows.”
“Is that why we’re just hearing about this now?” Ronnie asks.
“Homicide was taking care of the murders. We’ve only recently found out that the girls that aren’t being tossed in the trash, are being prostituted out and raped. There’s an open position at the club. Ronnie, I need you to go undercover as a dancer. Start off as a bottle girl, but I need you to get into that dressing room and get whatever information you can. Harry, I need you to be her handler.”
“So I have to take my clothes off, and he gets to be my pimp?” Ronnie scoffs.
“I know it’s not the most appealing thing for you, but you’re the only female detective we have that could actually pass as an erotic dancer.”
“Gee thanks.” She rolls her eyes. “I’ll do it, but I’m keeping whatever lingerie I have to buy.”
“Deal.” Cap looks at Harry next. “What do you say?”
“I’ll do it. I don’t trust anyone else to work this with Ronnie. I think Miller’s head would explode if he saw her dressed provocatively.”
“Stop it.” She shakes her head. “When do we start?”
“Immediately.” He hands them each a folder. “That has the information on where you’ll be staying, your new ID’s-“
“We have to stay in the same apartment together?” Ronnie asks.
“Once Harry gets in good with these people, they may come around to check for bugs and wires. It has to look like you both live together.”
“Captain, respectfully, Harry is a slob. I can’t live with him in a…oh my god, this is for a fucking studio?”
“That’s what they gave me funding for, Walsh. I’m sorry it’s not ideal.” Cap says facetiously.
“Is there at least a couch for him to sleep on?”
“Why do I have to sleep on the couch?” Harry scoffs.
“Because you’re not going to be the one sliding up and down a greasy pole every night.”
“Fair.”
“Enough. Go take some time to get familiar with your new identities, and go shop for whatever you may need to make it look convincing. You’ll be staying at your new apartment tonight. Have fun, and try not to kill each other.” He looks at them. “Or…anything else.”
They both roll their eyes at that, and leave the office. Ronnie takes out her phone and calls Mark to let him know what’s going on. He’s up in the squad room ten minutes later.
“How long will you be gone for?” He asks her by her locker.
“I don’t know, it could be weeks…months.”
“Months?”
“These things either happen fast, or they’re really slow. You know that.” She closes her locker and looks up at him. “I’m sorry, I know this isn’t the best thing happening right now. But at least we’re not living together, you won’t miss me too much.”
“Don’t use this as an excuse.” He sighs. “Are you at least being given a burner phone so we can still have contact?”
“Yes, but I have to use it carefully. If our place gets bugged or something, it could mean game over. I feel bad for Harry. He barely sees his kids as it is. This is going to be really tough for him.”
“Yeah, Romeo.” Harry says as he opens his own locker. “Don’t worry, I’ll take good care of our girl.”
“Can you give us a minute, Styles? We’re talking.”
“Mmm, no.” He grins and leans back against the lockers. “No, I think I’ll continue eavesdropping. Kathleen’s bringing the kids by so I can see them before we go, so I’ve got time.”
“Harry.” Ronnie looks up at him with her big brown eyes, and he all but melts.
“Fine, I’ll leave you alone. Oh, when we go to the store to get all your stripper accessories, should we get you some sex toys?”
“Christ, Harry.” She shoves him away, making him laugh.
“Does he always have to be so crude with you?” Mark asks her. “This is the sex crimes division for fuck sake.”
“We do it to each other, it’s just how we work. If we don’t find reasons to laugh, we’d cry.”
“So, we can’t even go be alone for a bit?” He steps closer to her, making her blush.
“I want to…” She looks over her shoulder at the bunk room, then back to her boyfriend. “I should really start briefing myself on this case. I want to check the homicide detective’s notes, see what we’re really dealing with. I’m sorry, Mark. I know…I know this is what makes our relationship difficult.”
“It’s alright, I understand.” He leans in and kisses her, then pecks her forehead. “I love you.”
“Love you too.”
While Ronnie is on the computer looking over everything, Harry is talking with Kathleen and the kids. Ronnie can’t believe Katie’s already five, and that Eddie’s already two.
“How long will you be gone for, Daddy?” Katie asks him. She’s got her arms around his neck, her bottom being supported by his hip while Eddie is on his other hip. Ronnie looks away before she has time to fantasize about how strong her partner is.
“Well, Daddy’s not sure. I’m going on a top secret mission, so Daddy won’t be able to see you for a while, but I’ll do my best to call when I can.”
“What about on FaceTime?” Katie looks up at him, pouting.
“We won’t be able to do that, sweetie, I’m sorry.”
“But…but I’m gonna miss you.” Her bottom lip starts to quiver. Harry looks at Kathleen. She takes Eddie from him so he can properly hug his daughter, biting back tears of his own.
“I’m going to miss you too, so much. You have no idea.”
“Why…why do you like being with Ronnie more than Mommy?”
“Katie.” Kathleen says. “Now’s not the time for that.”
“Sweetheart, it’s not that I…Ronnie and I work together, that’s all. She’s going on the secret mission with me. We keep each other safe. And while I’m gone, Mommy will keep you and Eddie safe, alright?”
“Will you miss Mommy too?”
Harry and Kathleen look at each other, and her face flushes from the coy smirk forming on Harry’s face. “Of course I will. I’ll miss you, Eddie, and Mommy very much. I’ll check in when I can, okay? I need you to be a brave, big girl and help Mommy a little more. Can you do that for me?”
“Yeah.”
“That’s my girl.” He hugs her and gives her a kiss before setting her down. He takes Eddie back and tosses him into the air, making him laugh. “Alright, little man. Need you to be a big boy.” Harry takes Eddie’s thumb out of his mouth.
“Okay.” Eddie says with his precious, soft spoken toddler voice.
“I love you.”
“Wove you too, Daddy.”
Harry smiles at his boy and sets him down. He tells Katie he loves her as well, then looks at Kathleen.
“I know you don’t need me to tell you this, but be careful.” She says to him.
“I like it when you tell me to be careful. It helps having your voice in my head.”
“Come back in one piece.” Her voice cracks as she throws her arms around his neck. He holds her close.
“Don’t cry, it’s going to be alright. I’ve gone undercover before.” He coos into her hair.
“Not like this.” She pulls back from him and pecks his lips before fully letting go. “Check in when you can, like you said.”
“I will. I love you, you know that, right?”
“Yes, and I love you too.” She picks up Eddie and sighs. She and Ronnie make eye contact, but neither of them say anything to the other. There’s nothing to say.
**
Harry walks around the store while Ronnie picks out clothes to buy. It’s all miniskirts and tight dresses. Then she goes to the lingerie section, and he joins her.
“Would you ever wear any of this stuff for real?” He asks her as he picks up a pair of crotchless panties. “It can’t be comfortable.”
“It’s not. This is stuff you put on when you tell a guy you’re going to slip into something more comfortable.”
“But you just said it’s not comfortable.”
“It’s not, but it’s also not going to stay on for very long.” She grabs a few bras and throws them in her cart. “I have to buy makeup too.”
“Don’t you already own makeup?”
“Yes, but I mostly wear neutral colors, nothing too heavy. I need to get some pallets with more vibrant colors. I need to get fake lashes. Oh! I’m going to need some highlighter.”
“Jesus, this is going to be never ending. I hope Katie’s a tomboy so she doesn’t have to deal with all this.”
“How’s that working out so far?”
“Not great, she’s all about princesses and Barbies right now. It’s actually pretty cute, and she has a wild imagination. I always have fun when we play with her dolls.”
“You play Barbie with her?” Ronnie pouts up at him endearingly.
“Course I do.” He shrugs. “It’s important to spend time doing the things your kid likes to do, rather than dragging them out to do something you want to do. As she gets older, she won’t feel like it’s a chore to hang out with me because she’ll know I’m up for whatever she wants to do. Within reason. I don’t want her thinking I’m going to take her to get a tattoo before she’s eighteen.”
“You’re a really good dad.”
“Thanks. I hope she and Eddie feel the same way.”
“They do, they have to. You’re doing the best you can.”
“Right. Let’s keep shopping. I’m ready to get the fuck out of here.”
The two get all the things they need, and head to their new home for the seeable future. It’s a nice place, but it’s going to be hard for them both to stay in such a small space.
“So, who’s taking the bed for real?” He asks her later that night over takeout.
“I have a proposition.”
“I’m not sleeping foot to face.”
“That’s not what I was going to suggest. I was thinking we could just stick some pillows between us so we can both sleep on the bed.”
“Do we need a barrier at all? I’m not going to try to fuck you while you’re sleeping.”
“Well, obviously, or I’d say you’re in the wrong line of work.” She smirks. “I just want us both to be comfortable.”
“I won’t sleep if I feel like I need to be rigid.”
“Okay, so no pillows.”
“We’re both adults who have shared beds with people before. I think it’ll be fine.”
“What do you usually wear to bed?” She asks him.
“Boxers. What about you?”
“Oversized t-shirt.”
“Well, if anyone busts the door down we’ll at least look the part of a couple.” He takes another bite of food, then sets his container down. “You and Mark have a quickie earlier?”
“No.” She laughs. “We almost did, but I wanted to start briefing myself. I felt bad, but isn’t this more important?”
“You need to find that answer on your own. I’m clearly not the expert.”
“I think you just married someone that bit off more than they could chew. You’ve been in this line of work since you two were married. She knew how hard it was going to be.”
“It wasn’t like this when I was in vice. I had standard shifts, the same schedule for months on end. That worked for us. I don’t blame her…so you shouldn’t either.”
“Sorry.” She swallows down a noodle.
“Why won’t you move in with Mark? An attorney like him should have a great place, definitely one big enough for two people.”
“It’s big enough for more than two people, that’s the problem.”
“What do you mean?”
“I mean…he’s been dropping hints about wanting to really settle down together. He wants to have kids with me. I love him, I really do, but I don’t know if I’m the type of person that can handle all those things.”
“You’re great with kids.”
“I know that, but I’d never be around. I’d be working all the time. I’m just not ready for it.”
“Have you told him that?”
“Yes.” She sighs. “But neither of us necessarily wants to break up, so we have a fight once every few weeks, and then we move on.”
“Maybe the time apart will help you both gain perspective on what you really want from each other.”
“That’s sort of what I’m hoping for.” She takes a sip of water, then sighs. “So, what’s our backstory?”
“I’m your pimp.” He smirks.
“You’re my handler, not my pimp.”
“It’s the same thing.”
“No it’s not. A pimp pimps their girls out to have sex with other people. Handlers don’t do that.”
“It’s the same thing, but whatever.” He rolls his eyes. “How should we approach that, by the way?”
“Approach what?”
“You having sex. I don’t want you to get forced into something.”
“I’m supposed to start off as a bottle girl, then work my way up. So I should be fine. Once you get in good with the bosses, you can just tell them they can look, but they can’t touch. I’ll stay focused on getting information from the other girls, you stay focused on gaining the trust of the bosses.”
“Arthur Jones is the guy we’re looking to bring down. He’s the head of the entire operation.”
“We should go there in the late afternoon tomorrow when it’s not busy and see about me getting a job. Do you know which detectives from narcotics are already undercover there?”
“Yeah, Cap texted me who to look for. It’s another guy.”
“Okay, so none of the girls are under cover. Damn, it’s gonna take me some time to become friends with them.”
“Apparently, we have all the time in the world.”
The two clean up from dinner, then take turns washing up before bed. It’s a little awkward when they both slip under the covers, but they’re both able to fall asleep easily.
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Text
Rolling with the Punches ~CollegeStudent!Broken!Casey Novak xFem Reader (Charlie Angst)
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Summary— Set in past, when Casey was still with Charlie. Casey shows up at your doorstep after a fight with Charlie. You are left to pick up the pieces of a broken Casey Novak.
Mommy… Master List
Requests & Prompt-List
Warnings: mild SVU spoilers, angst, crying, implied anxiety attacks, implied abuse, implied abusive relationships, comforting, physical comfort, fluff, etc.
Enjoy (:
You didn’t question how or why Casey wound up at your doorstep on a pouring night at 3 am. But she looked like a wreck with smudged makeup, raw skin and red eyes. You simply let the drenched redhead in without another thought.
“Christ Case, you’re soaking…!” You exclaimed softly, immediately guiding the young woman into the house and towards your main bathroom, “Come on, let’s get you out of these clothes… don’t want you getting sick…” you hummed.
“I… sorry mm sorry….” Casey rambled in a mutter.
Casey simply followed along to the bathroom. You turned around a found the redhead frozen in tears in front of you.
“Oh honey…” you comforted, opening your arms and nearly falling back into the bathroom with how the redhead barreled into your embrace.
You didn’t care that you were getting wet off of her drenched clothes one bit. Her head nuzzled into the crook of your neck as she let out a fresh batch of sobs. You could feel the young woman trembling underneath your touch. This only resolved you to hold her closer, wanting to let her know that she was okay and that she was safe.
“You’re okay, Case. I’m here, you’re safe.” You cooed softly.
You swayed back and forth in the doorway of your bathroom, until her sobs stifled and she let out a sniffle, pulling back and meeting your caring gaze.
“I’m sorry I^^hic^^ didn’t know where to go… I left and I couldn’t stop and I just ended up here and—” the redhead whispered.
Your heart melted for concern at the woman’s disposition. She had walked from her place all the way to yours, not impossible, but terribly long considering it had been pouring the entire time.
“Oh Casey it’s okay. It really is. Now, let’s get you into a warm shower… Don’t want you getting sick on me.” You gently comforted the redhead, indicating to the large shower in the bathroom.
Casey nodded as she shuffled into the lavish room. You followed her, pulling out a warm, fluffy towel and placing it on the counter for her.
“If you leave your wet clothes by the door, I can run them through the wash for you while you shower.” You softly hummed.
Casey nodded once more.
“Thank you…” she croaked.
You immediately nodded, squeezing her shoulder lightly and reassuringly.
“Of course, Case. I’ll be in the kitchen when you’re done.”
Receiving an understanding nod from the young woman, you left the bathroom, closing the door behind you. Soon you heard the shower start, and you took that as your cue to grab her wet clothes and throw them in your dryer. You then walked into your kitchen with a sigh, itching for a glass of wine. Your nimble fingers grabbed a glass and a bottle of red, instinctually pouring just the right amount, as if you had done this before.
Sipping at your wine, you surveyed your food provisions to see what you could offer Casey. You had an inkling of why she was here in the middle of the night… You had noticed the bruising along her face and arms. You knew that she was in a complicated relationship… to say the least.
With another sigh, you decided on making some breakfast for dinner for the poor girl. Not that it was either time of the day to eat, but you had a feeling that she needed to eat. You cooked up some eggs, bacon, and pancakes. As you were plating the pancakes, Casey came padding into the kitchen wrapped in the fluffy towel. You saw her eyes go wide and her mouth practically salivating at the sight of food.
“Come, sit and eat.” You softly instructed the woman, “Your clothes aren’t done yet, but I can grab you some of mine for now if that’s alright?”
Casey scurried over to the large kitchen island, sitting on the opposing end. You pushed the plates towards her as you plated the last pancake and handed her some silverware. It took her less than three seconds to start digging in right then and there. You chuckled lightly as you cleaned off your hands. Casey’s face flushed in embarrassment at her current ravaging nature.
“Mm sorry…” she mumbled, gazing up from her plate to you with a strip of bacon hanging out of the left side of her mouth, “Clothes would be great”
“Don’t worry about it, eat ‘hun. I’ll grab you something to wear.” You hummed caringly.
Casey nodded, returning her full attention back to the plates of food. You smiled lightly, happy to see the redhead eating something, before going deeper into your apartment to find her some clothes. You came back to all of the plates on the island being completely cleaned off. You handed Casey a pair of pajamas. The redhead muttered a thank you, before padding over to the bathroom and getting changed.
When she came back out, Casey let out a yawn. You had cleaned up all the dishes and were making yourself some tea on the counter. The redhead walked up to the island, fidgeting with her hands as she sat on a bar stool. You handed her a mug of hot tea.
“Thanks…”
“Of course.”
Silence took the room for a moment, before you spoke again,
“You don’t have to talk about it if you don’t want to… You’re more than welcome to stay in the guest bedroom for the night.” You hummed.
Casey fiddled with the mug, keeping her eyes low. Her hair was still damp, and she smelled of your body wash.
“I… I—” Casey stammered before breaking down into tears once more in front of you.
You put your mug aside to draw your full attention to the redhead. And you immediately rounded around the island, placing your hand on her back reassuringly rubbing little circles along her trembling and small frame.
“Hey, sweetheart. It’s okay. It’s gonna be okay…” you cooed gently.
Casey sniffed violently a couple times to try and reign her tears in. You squeezed her shoulder reassuringly, making sure to let her know that it was alright. The redhead then turned toward you and curled her face up into your chest.
“I didn’t… didn’t think it would get this… like this…” She stammered, spiraling in thought.
“I know, I know, sweet girl. This is not your fault.” You comforted.
Casey hiccuped again.
“I… I don’t know what to do…” she whispered into your chest in confession, clinging on tight to your frame and not showing any indication of letting go anytime soon.
You hummed and let her lean into your embrace as much as you needed. You knew what she had to do, but you also knew that now was not the time that she needed to hear it.
“Why don’t you get some sleep? Then we can talk in the morning.” You softly hummed.
Casey reluctantly peeled her face off of your chest and shirt, looking up at you hesitantly.
“Don’t want to be alone right now…” she whispered,
“D-don’t know what I might do”
Trying to mask the anger and fury coursing through your veins, you gulped lightly and nodded in recognition. You hated what this Charlie was doing to Casey. Destroying her every fiber of self, self worth, self confidence, self esteem… You wanted to go over there yourself and tear her a new one. But you took a deep breath instead.
“I understand. Why don’t you sleep with me tonight? We can cuddle if that would help…?” You offer.
Casey’s eyes immediately light up a little brighter at your offer. She nods slowly but eagerly and lets you lead her to the main bedroom. You let her climb into bed, while you change into your nightwear. Then you join the redhead, allowing her to curl up into your chest under the covers.
“Good Night, Casey”
“Mmmm night…”
Casey was off like a light, dozing away almost the second she curled up next to you. You could feel her tired bones finally relaxing against you, hear her snoring ever so slightly. It gave you a moment to sigh and let all your emotions out.
“Charlie doesn’t deserve you, honey…” you sigh.
~~~
Casey Novak Masterlist
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youdoknowwhotfiam · 1 month
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Olivia Benson x fem!Reader
FREE PALESTINE
ANGST
Masterlist
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(Credit to the owner)
The precinct lights cast a sickly yellow glow on your face as you slumped back in your chair. The file lay open on your desk, its stark details screaming at you. 10-year-old girl, missing for two days, possible abduction. The picture of the little girl, bright smile and eyes full of life, mirrored your own sister's at that age. A wave of nausea washed over you, bile rising in your throat. You squeezed your eyes shut, willing it away.
Olivia found you like that, head buried in your arms, the silence in the normally bustling squad room a dead giveaway. Concern etched lines on her forehead as she knelt beside you, her hand brushing against yours hesitantly. You flinched at the contact, the dam finally breaking.
"Hey," she murmured, her voice laced with worry. "What's wrong?"
You looked up, vision blurred with tears. The words came out in a broken whisper, "It's Sarah. The case, it's Sarah."
Olivia's brow furrowed. Sarah was your younger sister, the sunshine to your storm. You rarely spoke of her at work, preferring to keep your personal life separate. But this, this case ripped through those carefully constructed walls, leaving you raw and exposed.
She pulled you into a hug, your trembling form a stark contrast to her steady embrace. The familiar scent of her vanilla perfume and leather jacket did little to ease the storm raging inside you. You clung to her, burying your face in her shoulder, tears soaking the fabric of her uniform.
"It's okay," she whispered, her voice a soothing balm. "Let it out."
You didn't hold back. The image of the missing girl, so like Sarah, the fear of what she might be going through, the helplessness that clawed at your insides – it all came pouring out in a torrent of choked sobs. Olivia held you tight, a silent pillar of strength amidst the wreckage of your emotions.
When the last sob subsided, leaving you drained and shaky, she pulled back, wiping away the tears that streamed down your face with her thumbs. Her green eyes held a depth of tenderness that both soothed and ached.
"You don't have to pretend to be okay," she said softly. "We'll find her. We always do."
The unwavering certainty in her voice offered a sliver of hope. But the memory of countless cases with less fortunate endings loomed large.
The ride home was a blur. Olivia drove in silence, her hand resting on yours in a comforting gesture. You stole a glance at her profile, the strain etched on her face mirroring your own.
Once inside your apartment, the weight of the day truly hit you. You collapsed onto the couch, burying your face in the cushions. A choked sob escaped your lips.
Olivia knelt before you, her hand cupping your cheek. Her touch was gentle, a silent question in her eyes. You looked up, the raw vulnerability in your gaze a stark contrast to your usual stoicism.
"I can't," you whispered, voice thick with emotion. "What if we don't find her? What if..."
Olivia didn't let you finish. She pulled you close, cradling you in her arms. You melted into her embrace, the familiar scent and warmth a grounding force amidst the chaos.
"We will," she said fiercely, her voice a promise. "We always do everything we can. But it's okay not to be okay. You don't have to carry this alone."
You clung to her, the sound of her steady heartbeat a lighthouse in the storm. Tears streamed down your face again, a mixture of grief, fear, and a sliver of hope rekindled by her unwavering support.
As the minutes ticked by, your sobs subsided into sniffles. Olivia remained by your side, a silent pillar of strength. When you finally pulled back, your eyes red-rimmed but a flicker of determination returning, she brushed a stray tear from your cheek.
"We'll get some rest," she said, her voice firm but gentle. "And tomorrow, we fight like hell to bring that little girl home."
You nodded, a newfound resolve settling in your gut. The case wouldn't be easy, the path ahead uncertain. But with Olivia by your side, a love that had weathered countless storms, you knew you could face anything.
Later that night, as you lay curled up beside Olivia, the weight of the day finally lifted. The gentle rise and fall of her chest lulled you into a restless sleep, haunted by flashes of the missing girl's face and your sister's bright smile.
The following days were a blur of activity. You and Olivia dove headfirst into the case, chasing down leads, interviewing witnesses, the urgency to find the missing girl a constant
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poetrybyhai · 19 days
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Right outside your door
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Olivia Benson x Elliot Stabler one shot
Set in season 7 after “fault”
__________________________________
Elliot wanted to go talk to her, he needed to. But everyone had told him if he didn't give her some space, things between them would only get worse.
So for the first time in the seven years he had known her, Elliot was hesitant to go knock her door.
How could things between them possibly get any worse though? She was completely ignoring his existence.
He was spiraling, everyone around him knew it.
And Dammit those nightmares, he had been having the same reoccurring nightmares since the day he found out she left, nightmares about losing her entirely, not just from his life but from the the entire world.
They were based around what almost happened a few weeks ago.
What he couldn't bare to even think about.
And the more time passed without seeing her, the more vividly they played out and the more real they began to feel.
It was terrifying.
And so embarrassing, he's stronger than this. Elliot Stabler doesn't wake up panicking from nightmares. My gosh, that didn't even happen when he had PTSD from the military.
It didn't happen after any traumatizing case, and there were so many of them he had lost count.
What was this woman doing to him?
                                     ~~~
Flashes of Olivia's lifeless body on the cold floor, played out in his mind. her eyes rolling in the back of her head, blood gushing everywhere, her face turning white, his hand feeling for a pulse that was gone.
Flashes of his partner bleeding out in front of him.
Each time he had that same nightmare, he always woke up right before he blurted out the three words, he only ever allowed his mind to say in that split second he thought he was losing her.
"Olivia, don't go I.."
                                          ~~~
It was now a quarter after midnight and Elliot yet again, was swimming in a pool of his own sweat, gasping for air.
Crying out her name.
"Dad"
No response.
"Dad"
"No response."
"DAD!" The voice echoed much louder than before, julting him awake.
"Ahh, what!? He gasped nearly falling off the bed.
"Dad, you're scaring me, what the hell was that about?" Kathleen questioned, her voice laced with confusion.
"Kathleen?" His eyes wandered around the room trying to make out his surroundings. "What are you doing here?"
She raised her brow at him, "Do you not remember?"
"You picked me up from Trevor's house because, his dad was making me uncomfortable, I had to beg you not to kill him.. we went to denny's afterwards?" she went on, trying to jog his memory.
This was weird, it had only been a few hours and he didn't remember how she got there?
Elliot stared off into space, trying to remember the events his daughter just described to him, but his body was still in fight or flight mode and his mind was foggy.
Finally, after an unusually long minute, things came back to him, and he could see the relief on Kathleen's face when he bellowed a loud "ohh." As he slowly came back to reality.
"You scared me dad, I thought you might have dementia or something."
He laughed lightly "No honey, not yet at least."
"Are you okay though?" she asked, that same expression returning to her face.
"Yeah, I'm fine honey." He tried to assure her, even though he knew she probably heard him screaming.
"Are you sur."
"Sweetheart, I said I'm fine."
His daughter wasn't convinced, she made her way to the side of his bed and pressed her hand to his forehead, "dad, you're covered in sweat that must've been quite the intense nightmare, do you have PTSD from what happened with Olivia?."
He visibly stiffened at the mention of her name, the nightmare still fresh, and his mind not exactly fully awake yet.
"What would make you think that?" He replied, hoping she wouldn't pry any further, his kids didn't need to be involved in this, he didn't want them to suspect anything strange when he didn't even know what was going on himself.
"Because you were screaming her name." she said, squinting her eyes at him in puzzlement.
"Was I? That's weird."
Kathleen crossed her arms and gave him a challenged look "Dad, come on, you might be a good liar at work but you'll always be a horrible one in your person life.. especially when you're talking to me."
"Honey, it's not something you need to worry about, I don't even  know why I would say that."
"Your ears are red."
"What?"
"Your ears are red." She repeated, "your ears get red when you're lying."
"Kathleen, why don't you go to bed? don't you have school tomorrow."
"You should go talk to her." she blurted out, ignoring his last statement.
"Kathleen.." he warned.
But she didn't budge.
"Dad."
"Kathleen, seriously!"
"I'm serious dad! You should go talk to her, do you think I'm stupid? I know, I've known for years."
"I don't know what you're talking about."
"You heard me dad, I wasn't born yesterday, even if to you, it seems like I was, I'm a woman now, I've been one for a while, and we know things."
"Whatever you think you know, you can't know because, I don't even know." He babled in response, although what he said was true, he didn't know.
Or maybe he did know, but denial is a strong thing.
"I'm not saying you have to pour your heart out to her, but at least go apologize."
"I did! I left her a voicemail, I called her 30 times!" Now he was getting angry, he had to remind himself this was his daughter, and now was not the time to lose his temper.
"She'd rather hear you say it to her face, otherwise she's going to think you're just telling her what she wants to hear so she'll come to you."
Elliot looked at her with the up most puzzled expression before he replied, How would you know that? she's not a family member, you don't even know her."
"You're wrong dad, she's been like family to us for a long time."
And those words right there caused tears to well up in his eyes, his kids considered her family.
It was a weird dynamic.
But not one he was willing to just let go of.
She couldn't just never talk to him again.
Cus' as much as she thought of him as a stubborn son or a bitch, she was one too.
Kathleen was right he had to go to her.
"When did you get so mature?" he smiled at his daughter sadly.
She smiled back before evolving him as a hug.
"I wasn't born yesterday."
"Lovely." She mumbled to herself sarcastically before emerging out of bed and making her way to the bathroom to splash cold water on her face.
Suddenly she didn't feel the slightest bit tired anymore.
So instead of going back to bed when she saw the clock read 1:30AM she decided to go in the living room and watch tv.
Ugh, why did he have such a hold on her? It's like she couldn't escape him no matter what she did, not in her wake, not in her sleep. He was always on her mind, no matter how much she fought to get him out of it, he was still there.
And she wondered how long she could go on like this for. Ignoring him, declining his calls, revolving her life around trying to forget about him until the anger subsided enough that she could talk to him again, even though things would never be the same after this, and she couldn't expect them to be.
She didn't think it would be this hard, she knew it would be different, she knew it would hurt but not this much, nothing was the same anymore, nothing had been the same since Gitano.
It's not like she thought leaving was going to fix anything, but she didn't feel like she had any other choice.
There was no way to fix this.
Before Gitano, Olivia truly believed that nothing could break them apart, because it wasn't an easy job, they had their fair share of screaming contests when they disagreed on something, she slammed doors in his face more times than she'd like to admit, there were many ups and downs in their partnership, many times she swore she hated him and was sure he hated her back.
But when they went crashing down, they always came back to each other, every single time.
Until now.
She didn't know how to accept that Gitano, that case, very well might've ruined them for good, and there would be no coming back around this time.
She couldn't lose him, but she couldn't face him either.
Olivia was starting to realize, that though she was able to run, she wasn't able to hide.
But she couldn't face what she was feeling and she wasn't even sure she knew how to.
Trying to block out her thoughts Olivia began flipping through the channels, settling on a repeat of the bachelor, one of her favorite comfort shows. Though, nothing seemed to bring her much comfort these days.
And then came a knock on her door.
At first she thought it was the tv.
But then it happened again.
A knock she could recognize anywhere.
"Not now, my gosh, not now." she mumbled to herself.
By the 10th knock Elliot was growing impatient, he wasn't going to let her continue to ignore him, not when he drove over here, in the middle of the night, not when this had been the longest week of his life.
"Olivia! Olivia! I know you're in there!" He bellowed.
She didn't answer.
"Olivia, I can feel you thinking, you can't avoid me forever."
"Dammit Elliot, it's 2am." she uttered.
"Just let me in."
"No."
"Let me in!" He repeated.
" I said no!"
"Olivia for the love of god, what are we are five years old now? Just open the damn door."
And she was silent again.
"Olivia! Let me in."
Really? Now he chose to do this.
It was never going to be a good time.
Olivia made her way to the door but she still refused to open it, now standing beside the door, her forehead pressed against the wall, her hand dangerously close to the knob.
No, she wasn't doing this right now.
"Go home Elliot."
"Olivia, I swear to god if you don't open this door I'm going to bust in down."
He couldn't be serious.
"Try me and i'll sue you for breaking and entering."
"I have a key." He reminded her.
"You still have a key!"
"Just let me in."
"It’s not a good time."
"It's never going to be a good time Liv, but I need to freaking talk to you!"
He was just about to reach for the spare key when he heard her unlock the hinge.
"You got five minutes." She told him as she finally opened the door, blocking the entrance with her body.
God, she was beautiful and he couldn't help but stare, despite the fact that he was low key beginning to hate her for the games she was playing.
"Well hello to you too, aren't you going to let me in."
Olivia only crossed her arms in response, "Whatever it is, you can say from where you are."
He looked at her with a mixture of disbelief and anger before mocking her actions and crossing his arms as well. You've got to be kidding me Liv."
"I'm serious El, spit it out."
"Why are you acting like this?!"
"What are you talking about."
"I'm not playing along with your petty junior high games Olivia, I came here to talk to you now let me in." He demanded, catching her off guard when he pushed past her, making his way to her couch.
"What do you think you're doing?."
"I said we needed to talk." He stated, as if it was a demand.
"And I said it wasn't a good time."
"And I said it's never going to be a good time."
My god, he had a way of making her lose every ounce of patience she had in her.
"Then why are you here?!
"I said we needed to talk."
And for a good minute, they just stared at each other, neither willing to back down, neither willing to give in.
She saw everything in his eyes as they continued their stare off, the hurt, the betrayal, the regret, the sadness, the pain.
How dare he come here and try to make her feel bad? how dare he come here and look at her like that, like she ruined him.
~~~
Olivia was the first to break the silence, "Dammit Elliot what is the matter with you?"
"I could ask you the same thing."
"Oh really? Last time I checked I didn't show up at your place at 2am, banging on the door and yelling like I'm on fire." She shot back.
"No, you just quit and completely cut me out of your life without even so much as a text message." he quipped.
"I didn't cut you out of my life Elliot."
"Then why haven't I heard from you in an entire fucking week!" He yelled, emerging from the couch and beginning to pace the living room, Elliot had every intention of coming over to apologize, not to start a fight, but her stubbornness was too much and his anger was now overpowering the guilt he had been feeling.
Olivia stayed in place, not wanting to fight with him again, trying to calm herself before she lost it, he knew her every button and just now to push them. "I needed space! Did you really think I was going to ignore you forever? Really says a lot about how well you know me."
He laughed bitterly in response "You have no idea what you have put me through."
That was it.
Suddenly, it didn't matter if they fought she didn't care, she was enraged and she wasn't going to let him talk to her like that, not again.
Not this time.
Not when he barged into her house at 2am, like a fucking F5 tornado.
"What I've put you through!?" She screamed, not even realizing she was now yelling in his face.
He didn't back down and they were now so close they could feel each other's hot breath on their necks. "Yeah, you heard me."
She felt dizzy.
"I knew that voicemail was a lie! you're not sorry, you're not even capable of feeling sorry, you fucking ego maniac!"
She was right but it didn't stop the rage in him from intensifying.
"I was sorry Olivia! don't you dare tell me I lied to you! I was fucking sorry but that was before I found out you quit, before I found out that you had no intention of ever talking to me again! Now, now you don't deserve for me to be sorry, cus' you had to go and make sure you hurt me that much more!"
"So that's what you think this is?!" Tears were now welling in her eyes, his words cutting her deeper than that knife ever did. That I'm just trying to hurt you more than you've hurt me? as if this is some kind of sick content?"
"It sure as hell seems like it!"
Olivia said nothing in response, she only went to the kitchen to pour herself a glass of wine, desperately needing an excuse to get away from him.
She felt like all the air had left the room.
And so did he.
But he wasn't going to run.
She wanted to run but this was her house.
She has nowhere to go.
"So that's what you wanted? To just cut me off and never talk to me again!" Now Elliot was the one with tears welling up in his eyes.
"I already told you, I needed space, I can't breathe when I'm around you anymore you fucking suffocate me!" she spat.
"And you think that I can breathe around you? You think that you don't suffocate me?" He shot back, his own tears threatening to fall.
"You have had no problem treating me like your personal fucking punching bag for the past month, you don't get to make this about you!"
"You're such a gosh damn child olivia!"
"Really? How many times have I saved your ass because you couldn't control yourself?"
"That's not the point!"
"You are too much Elliot! How can you expect me to look past you blaming me for your own choice? How can you expect me to be able to be around you anymore? All I see when I look at you, is resentment, resentment at me, for something you chose to do! And you know what? You're the damn child, because, I wouldve never, ever crossed that line!"
"Olivia don't you fucking get it? that's not why I'm angry!"
"Oh please." She scoffed.
"It's not! I'm not angry that I chose you, that was never why I was angry, my gosh that's not why I'm fucking standing here screaming at you in the middle of the night! That's not why I've been losing my mind ever since Gitano!"
"What the fuck is the reason then Elliot, tell me! tell me the fucking reason?!" She yelled, getting in his face again.
"Olivia you're out of your fucking mind if you really think I would've done anything differently if I could go back, do you really think I wouldn't do the same damn thing! do you really think I wouldn't still choose you if we found ourselves in the same situation tomorrow?"
She looked at him with a mixture of shock and something else he couldn't quite make out. "What the hell are you saying!"
"I'm not angry that I chose you! I'm angry that I don't regret choosing you! I'm angry that I'd choose you again without a single fucking ounce of hesitation!"
Olivia was taken aback by his words, by his confession. her heart beating so fast she swore he probably heard it echoing through the room.
"You don't think I feel the same fucking way Elliot?" She spat back, daring to to get even closer to him than she already was, he wasn't going to win this fight, not this time. "You're the idiot! For thinking that I could shoot you, that I could end your life, that I could live with myself if you died because of me! How could you be so stupid?!"
"That’s not the point Olivia, that’s not what this is about!" He yelled back.
"Then what is it about Elliot? What is it that you want from me?!”
"I want you to be honest!"
"Are you serious right now? I have been honest!"
"Bull shit Olivia! You weren't honest you ran away! But you know what? Maybe you're right, maybe this whole thing is my fault, cus' I should've known you would, it's what you do best anyway!"
He was in front of her, moving closer as if they weren't already unbearable closer because she was now grabbing the kitchen countertop for support as he cornered her against it.
They'd never fought like this before.
She said she couldn't take the way he had been looking at her, but the way he was looking at her now, was so much worse.
“fuck you Elliot! Get out!"
His eyes were laced with so much anger, so much pain and regret, but suddenly there was something different in his gaze, something that wasn't there before.
Desire.
"No."
did he really tell her no?
"Elliot, get out! she repeated lunging forward and attempting to push him away.
"What are you going to do if I don't?" He challenged, pushing her back against the counter top.
And his next move was something she never could've expected, not even in her wildest dreams.
Suddenly, the world went silent as he crashed his lips into hers.
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svuobsessed · 28 days
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Olivia Benson X Daughter reader
Summary: Y/N Benson is attacked on her way home, her Mum is not happy and Elliot is pissed.
TW: almost SA, description of almost rape, not much only the first part.
Third person pov...
14 year old Y/N Benson was on her way home from school, texting her friends as she walked, her bag on her back, she was heading to the station to meet her Mum so they could go home together.
As she walked she walked past a white man mid 20s, The instant she did she felt his eyes on her, it heightened her anxiety but she kept on walking, slowly she got out her phone from her pocket and began tapping on it.
The man then pushed himself away from the wall and began following the teen, he was tall, kept his head down.
Y/N looked behind her every few seconds while tapping on her phone.
She was planning to text her Mum and tell her what was happening, as she did she began quicker, she heard the man walk faster to catch up with her.
The H/C girl taps her Mums contact and begins typing, they had a code word for incidents like this.
"Hey there" comes voice from behind the girl scaring her. She turns quickly and hides her phone, the teen looks up it was the guy following her.
She stared at the man, not saying a word. This made the man angry, Y/N saw grit his teeth slightly, she then inches away slightly from him.
The guy keeps a friendly smile on his face as he looks at the young girl. "Sorry for scaring ya. Just wanted to ask if you could tell me where the library is?" He asks the girl, Y/N doesnt relax her legs tense she was ready to run if the guy posed as a threat.
She looks at the time on her phone her message to her Mum still open. Once seeing the time she looks back up. "Sorry can't help you" she says to the man unapologetic.
She turns to run but her wrist is grabbed, the mans grip was hard and it was painful. Y/N tried to wretch her arm away but it only made the grip on her wrist tighten, he was twisting her wrist a way it shouldn't go.
Tears at the corner of her eyes she tried to yell for help but one look from the guy said 'you scream and I break it' so she kept her mouth shut, with her hand gone she uses her other to try and text behind her back.
The guy sees this and grabs her phone, eyes in horror Y/N watches as he smashes her phone, struggling in his arms Y/N tries to wriggle away but isn't able to, she is then dragged into an alleyway.
She teenager tries to drag her feet but he is to strong, Tears in her eyes Y/Ns back is forced up again the wall, she begins scratching at the man, his hands , face anywhere she could reach. The guy takes it and pins her wrists to the wall.
He then slaps her face. "Stop struggling bitch! Or this will hurt" he yells at her, the teen freezes in fear, cheek turning a nasty red.
Smirking he begins trailing his free hand to her chest unbuttoning her school shirt, she looked away from him as he kept touching her, "Mummy" she cries quietly.
Thinking of her mum gave her the strength to open her eyes, she starts to stare, the creep looks up at her smirk gone at the new found fury in her eyes.
'Show no fear' she thinks, as she continues staring into his eyes. Luckily he let's go of her wrists, taking the chance Y/N swings her leg back and kicks him in thr groin.
"Fuck! You little bitch!" He yells holding his area, Y/N quickly rips out of his grasp, grabbing her bag she hits him one last time before running out of the alleyway not stopping until she got to the station.
Olivia was sat at her desk, her daughter was late. Looking at the clock again she became even more worried. Y/N should've been there 20 minutes ago.
Elliot waves at his partner from across the table. "Liv? Hello? Liv!" Liv shake sher head ans turns to Elliot. "Sorry El" she tells him.
Elliot shakes his head. "It'll right, are you okay?" He asks her, Olivia goes to answer but us cut off by something behind Elliot.
Face of horror, she stands from her desk and walks around Elliot towards the entrance, standing at the doors was a young girl, school shirt unbuttoned, shirt ruffled, bag barely hanging onto her shoudler, her face was a bright red turning purple.
"Y/N, baby what happened to you?" Before anyone knew it the young girl collapsed in a fit of sobs falling to her knees, Olivia bent to catch her in her arms. The girl only sobbed harder as she clung to the woman.
Liv tried to comfort her but was unsuccessful, eventually they were able to move the two into a room. Olivia sat with her daughter curled up on her lap still holding onto her neck.
Olivia rubbed her hand up and down
Y/Ns back, the girl was clearly traumatized, the team were worried.
"Y/N baby, you gotta tell me whats happened okay" she tells the girl, Y/N had calmed down alot since she was in her mother's arms.
Outside Elliot is pacing, he was worried about Y/N. He'd never seen her so upset before it scared him.
Inside Y/N pulled away from her Mums shoudler, sniffling she told her. Olivia was shocked, she was worried and she was pissed. "Baby, I'm so sorry that happened to you, I swear to god I will catch that bastard" she reassured the teen.
Eventually Y/N passed out from all her crying, Liv gave her a change of clothes a mix of her tshirt and Elliots sweatpants. The teen was currently asleep in the cots in the lockeroom.
Liv sits at her desk frozen as if in a trace, after what her daughter told her she didn't know what to think. As she sat El walked over to her.
"Liv, hey did Y/N tell you what happened?" He asks her, Liv shakes herself awake, the tears in her eyes scare Elliot, he kneels on the floor infront of her holding her hand gently.
"Liv-Ss-she told me she was almost raped" she cries, Elliot pulls her into a hug. If he didn't he would've smashed his fit into the table. "W-what" his throat dry.
Once Y/N was awake she gave them a description of the man who attacked her, she told them everything she rememberd she could never forget the way his hands felt or his piercing gaze.
Days later they caught the guy, attacking another young girl, before hand cuffing him Elliot and Liv managed to get a few good hits in for Y/N, all the team managed to get revenge for Y/N, Fin slammed him extra hard into the table in the interrogation room.
Munch made fun of the guy and told all his insecurities, Casey tore into him during his trail so bad he instantly pleaded guilty and got sent to prison for 20 years.
After that Liv made sure Y/N never walked home by herself again, always either with a friend or member of SVU. Y/N eventually recovered from the ordeal.
The end!
A rather angsty one hope you liked it, sorry for the wait, also for any grammar and Spelling mistakes.
Requests are open!
Word count: 1302
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poetoflawed · 1 month
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Ok im watching law and order SVU and like I need someone to write a Fic about Barba with the permis of the movie family man. Idk it’s just a storyline I think would work so well with him.
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