#I’m not sorry actually i am so tired of them and how they fucking treat us
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Maybe if managers actually did some work instead of just yelling at everyone else to work, then it wouldnt be so busy
#i am slowly turning into a manager hate blog#like yes they have other responsibilities but why is it#that they’re in 10 million meetings a day just talking about our productivity and how we’re not doing enough#when instead they can have just 1 or 2 meetings and spend the rest of their time helping us#USELESS. I’m sorry i hate them all#I’m not sorry actually i am so tired of them and how they fucking treat us#if they had to do half of what we do they would crash and burn#I’m so angry I’m so upset
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#got real tired of being misgendered real fast#every she is like a knife!! I hate it!!!#oh god and they really love to classic wife joke#I actually normally don’t mind ‘wife’ as a term but that’s when the people using it know I’m not actually a girl#she! she! she! 🔪🔪🔪 death and destruction#also this isn’t as bad as the misgendering but holy shit they are terrible guests#their house is always a mess and they just treat our house like theirs!#when we said ‘make yourself at home’ I didn’t actually mean ‘don’t bother cleaning up your messes’#who leaves water all over the counter at someone else’s house?? who leaves their shit just strewn about??#they have just like no decorum as guests and it’s too late to teach them how to behave themselves in someone else’s home#oh? are our floors cold? you don’t like our dining table? tell me what else you’re judging in someone else’s house Lynne. go ahead.#in case you don’t know it’s really rude to negatively comment on a bunch of stuff in someone’s home when they haven’t asked your opinion#and then they’re ‘she’ing me left and right!! somehow they use more pronouns per convo than I’ve ever heard#also! I am allergic to exactly one food why the fuck would you bring a bunch of stuff with it?? you couldn’t skip it??#I’ve never seen them eat so much cinnamon at their house I swear it’s like they’re fucking with me#sorry had to rant or ill explode
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𝐉𝐮𝐬𝐭 𝐔𝐬 ⊹ ִֶָ ❲ 𝘮𝘢𝘯𝘪𝘱𝘶𝘭𝘢𝘣𝘭𝘦!𝐜𝐡𝐫𝐢𝐬❳
𝐒𝐔𝐌𝐌𝐀𝐑𝐘, in which you save your relationship with chris because of his brothers trying to break you up
𝐏𝐀𝐈𝐑𝐈𝐍𝐆, chris x toxic!reader, chris x poc!reader
𝐂𝐎𝐍𝐓𝐀𝐈𝐍𝐒, angst, language, crying, manipulation, arguing
▐ ❝ 𝐰𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐰𝐞 𝐡𝐚𝐯𝐞 𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐲𝐬 𝐛𝐞𝐭𝐰𝐞𝐞𝐧 𝐮𝐬 ❞
𓏲 🎀🎱 𓂃 ✦ 💒
“yo, quick question”, chris announced to get his brothers attention.
nick and matt turned their heads towards chris, noticing his distraught facial expression, almost instantly sending them into a worry as well.
nick was the first to speak up, “what’s up”
“um”, chris scratched the back of his neck, looking for words that couldn’t make him sound like a complete idiot. “could yall come look at this”
as chris held up his phone the two triplets got up from where they’d normally lounge on the couch to get a closer view of his phone. chris watched in anticipation while his older brothers eyes scanned through the heated text messages between him and his girlfriend, frightened at what they’re reaction might be.
“wow”, was all matt said and nick followed with a simple “hmm”, causing chris to sigh and drag his hands down his face.
“am i cooked or what?”
matt nor nick knew what to tell the boy. this wasn’t the first time chris would come to them for advice, in fact this wasn’t even the tenth time. between you and chris they couldn’t tell who was more of the problem here, you would vent to nick about chris, chris would try to vent to nick but gets upset when nick already knows your side, so goes to matt only to find out that nick’s already told him too, and it’s the same shit every other week.
“i don’t know, just call her or something, that usually works”, nick patted his brother’s shoulder and went back to whatever was on the tv at the time.
matt followed nicks actions before stating, “yea, she’ll probably be over here in a little bit anyways”
“what so you guys don’t care either, how the fuck does anyone except a relationship to work if no one seems to care but me”, chris raised his voice as the blood started to rush within him. no matter who it was, he felt like all anyone ever did was brush him to the side and disregard anything he had to say. you were the only person who didn’t make him feel that way, even his brother did it from time to time but he knew he could always count on you to treat him like he was special. at least he thought he could. both brothers stared, appalled at the words that left chris’s mouth.
“sorry? since when were me and matt in a relationship with you guys”, nick exclaimed.
“you know what i mean”
“do you know what he means?”, matt budded in. he was so fed up with all of this, it was actually his breaking point. “i don’t even know why you’re still putting up with this shit, are you not tried?”
“tired of what?” chris looked at matt then to nick for some form of help as to what was going on now.
“shut the fuck up matt”, nick let out a breath while thinking of the right thing to say to their mess of a brother right now.
“listen we absolutely adore yn, she’s one of our closest friends, love her very dearly. we also love that you were able to find someone but like don’t you see the pattern that’s going on here”
he paused for another moment to see if chris was catching on, but to his dismay he wasn’t so he kept going. “how does all this make you feel, how is she making you feel right now?”
“not good—”, nick cut chris of before he could finish his full thought. “not good right, and i’m almost entirely sure that this is not the first time she’s made you feel like this, i’m pretty sure yn feels the same, are you picking up on what i’m saying?”
chris knew exactly what nick was saying he just didn’t want to believe it and he definitely wasn’t going to say it out loud because that would make it true. the more he thought the faster his heart went
“matt what do you think about this”, chris breathed out.
he hesitated before responding. “i don’t think you guys are the best for each other”
“jesus matt”, nick interrupts at matt’s bluntness.
“what, i’m done telling him what he wants to hear”, he turns back to chris and grabs his shoulder, “you guys have been toxic for a while now and it’s only been getting worse, open your fucking eyes kid”
chris just sat there. he could bring himself to say anything, let alone what to think, so he got up and left. once slamming the door he immediately went to your contact, pacing around his room waiting for you to answer. you did on the fifth ring.
“hello”
now that he’d finally got you on the other line he realized that he didn’t even think about what he was going to say, what was the purpose of calling you? “hey”
his voice came out way more wobbly than he expected, like he’d already been crying.
“you feel better now?” you teased.
chris let out a breath before speaking, “yea, can you just please come over here”
“yea, i’m on my way baby”
three beeps sounded from his phone, he threw it on his bed and continued to pace around, thinking about what to say to you. he didn’t want to start a fight but there were things that just had to be discussed. a huge part of him wanted to forget the whole situation and cuddle you once you walked through that door like he normally would in time like this. before he knew it a text appeared on his phone saying that you finally arrived. he didn’t bother to go get you.
you greeted matt and nick as you walked through their door but didn’t stop for small talk, they didn’t expect you to anyways. as you approached the door small sniffing could be heard and once it opened you were met with chris sitting on his bed with his head in his hands causing you to frown. you pulled his arm away and held his head against your stomach.
“what’s the matter baby, you alright?” you spoke softly.
he quickly prepared for what he was about to do next. “we just need to talk for a little”. chris pulled you down to sit on his left thigh so you were facing him.
you wiped the few tears from his cheeks. “about what?”
“about us”. he started to rub your thigh, wanting to provide you with some sort of comfort at the topic.
“oh, ok”
chris decided that the best way to get this over with was to rip the bandage off. “what do you think about our relationship?”
“um we’re.. good, we have our moments from time to time but we always come back”. you defended while running your fingers through the back of his head then placing a soft kiss in his hair.
there was a long wave of loud silence. “nick says we make each other feel bad and matt agrees, he says we’re not good together and this has been going on for longer than we thought. i don’t want to break up with you, but i don’t want to disappoint them and—” he cut himself off from word vomiting while running his fingers through his own hair. 
after a long pause chris stuttering up again, “i don’t know what to do i just want us to be okay”. he was hoping that at least one of you would be the sane one in the conversation but you were just has delusional has he was.
“ok, woah that was a lot to dump on me, are you kidding right now?” you laughed nervously in denial.
“i’m being serious yn, they think we’re toxic” he raised his voice a little as anger stared to bubble up in him.
you got off of his lap and stood in front of him. “what the fuck are you saying chris, your gonna’ let the fate of our relationship be in the hands of your brothers? your a grown ass man babe” you matched his energy plus adding a little of your own.
“they have a point though, we barely see each other so you get all passive and aggressive, i try to fix it by making more time for you and you don’t care, then we’ll make up, but nothing ever changes, sounds familiar?”
“because you don’t want to, what type of boyfriend forces themselves to spend time with their girlfriend and you’ve been so consumed with la that i was pretty sure this relationship was the last thing you thought about” all of this was far too much for chris. so much information was just fed to him in such a short amount of time and the more he dig the deeper it got.
his eyes squinted, “where is this coming from?”
“your actions, i’m not the type of person to make anyone be with me, i just can’t imagine not being with you, so i stay”
and just like that the whole thing was flipped on chris. he couldn’t even lie to himself, he felt terrible, the last thing he ever wanted to do was make you feel like you were anything but the most important person in his life, he felt selfish, narcissistic even. how could he put himself in your shoes then paint you out to be a villain? you’ve known each other since sophomore year and you’ve been together since that summer with no problem till now. chris was almost sure he was the problem.
“i can’t imagine not being with you either, i don’t ever want that to happen and i’m so, so sorry for pushing you to the side, i guess i was so scared of you doing it to me that i did it first, i’m sorry” chris practically begged for forgiveness, eating right out of the palm of your hand, it was too good, he was so gullible.
you brought him into your warm embrace, sitting back on your designated area in his lap. “it’s alright sweet boy i forgive you, and don’t listen to your brothers okay?, what we have stays between us and we’ll be better this time. i’m glad we had this talk” you placed a tender kiss on his lips followed by another.
“me too” chris mumbled before connecting your lips again. “are you going to let me make it up to you mama?”
“of course pa”
₊˚ˑ༄ؘ ❪ 𝙰𝚄𝚃𝙷𝙾𝚁'𝚂 𝙽𝙾𝚃𝙴 ❫ ✩₊˚. ◛ ·˚ ༘ ᝰ
⁀➷┊ ‧₊˚. definitely making a part two, YOU, MATT, AND NICK ARE ABOUT TO FIGHT
idk i think the way chris can’t express his feelings is so cute to me
tell me what you thought girl don’t forget to send me your request in my inbox
taglist- @worldlxvlys (COMMENT TO BE A PART OF THE TAGLIST???)
#black writers#chris sturniolo x black reader#chris sturniolo x reader#matt sturniolo x reader#nathan doe x reader#x black reader#chris sturniolo smut#summersover#chris sturniolo#matt sturniolo#nick sturniolo#chris sturniolo imagine#chris sturniolo angst#angst#sturniolo triplets#Spotify
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Very First Date.
Pairing: Steve Harrington x female reader.
Word count: About 5.1k words.
Warnings: 18+, Reader has a bad date with another guy who kept making sexual advances towards her.(Nothing detailed though.), Steve talks slightly about a fight with his father, reader mentions not having a good relationship with hers either for a moment. (Nothing really descriptive here either.) Other than that, its mostly a FLUFFYYYY PIECE.
I DID IGNORE THE LAYOUT OF STEVE’S ROOF FOR THE ENDING BECAUSE I WANTED THEM TO LOOK AT STARS.
Summary: Steve and the reader are best friends after having worked at Scoops together. Reader went out on a date with a guy which ended horribly and found herself at Steve’s to tell him about it and complain about how she hadn’t had a good date in months. Steve takes matters into his own hands since he’s into the reader and takes her out for a night wanting to remind her how she should be treated by a guy.
Author’s note: THIS IS MY FIRST STEVE HARRINGTON IMAGINE I HAVE FULLY FINISHED! Usually I would stop halfway through, worried they weren’t going to fit the image I had created in my head. I am feeling a lot better tonight, after having been in the ER the other night. And I’m surprised to be sharing something around 8pm instead of 2 am.
I did proofread but I’m sorry if I missed something, this was overall just a fluffy imagine I did because I saw a great Steve edit on Tiktok.
PLEASE CLICK ON MY ACCOUNT AND CHECKOUT MY OTHER WORK, I mostly write for Eddie and can’t add my writing masterlist because I’ve been having issues with being shadow banned.
But enjoy!
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Steve was having a horrible night.
His first Friday off in three weeks and he was at home moping alone.
First off you were out on a date with another guy. Not like it actually matters that it bothered him, because you two were just friends and that was it.
But on top of that, Robin canceled on him because Vickie asked her if she was free.
Which don't get him wrong, he was happy for his friend. But fuck did he not want to be alone tonight.
He thought about calling up Linda or Heidi, in the end deciding against it. He was tired of flings that weren't going anywhere.
Little did Steve know though, you were having as bad of night.
The date you were on had to be one of the worst you have ever been on.
You didn't even last past thirty minutes into it.
You told the boy you were heading to the ladies' room and snuck off quickly paying for a meal that wasn't even out yet before leaving.
Driving towards the Harrington home, you were ready to complain to your friends about how horrible another date went.
You felt defeated, like you were done with men.
Partially because the fact most of them were animals, and also just because they weren't the one you wanted anyway.
You wanted the boy who you were heading towards, the boy who felt like home to you when you needed someone to make you feel better.
You wanted Steve Harrington.
But you knew your friendship meant too much to you to even think about ruining it over some stupid feelings you had, so you kept them buried.
Opening the unlocked door you yell out into the home, trying to pinpoint where the two were.
"Steve? Robin?" You ask, closing the door behind you quietly hoping to not scare either of them.
From the kitchen Steve heard your voice, confused as he spread the mayo over the bread of the sandwich he was making.
"(Y/N)?" He questions, because he thought you would be on your date right now.
Steve felt his heart start beating faster as he realized you were here and not on your date, mind racing with different answers to why that might be.
Taking off your shoes and bag you respond to the boy by answering a loud,
"Yes," before leaving your items by the door.
Steve hears your muffled voice through the wall, smiling to himself. He was happy to know maybe he wouldn't be alone tonight. Even if it was just a friend, who he wish would be more.
But it still felt like a win because you were here instead of with some other guy.
"Kitchen." Steve tells you, hearing your steps coming through the hallway into the big kitchen.
You walk in to see him making a single sandwich, not sandwiches, just a sandwich.
"Is that what you're having for dinner?" You laugh confused on how that was going to fill him up. Hopping your body up, you take a seat on the counter behind him.
Steve shrugs, a light blush creeping on his face because he really wasn't expecting to see anyone tonight.
He was down and wanted something simple that didn't take much effort.
"I don't feel like making anything else." Steve says, finishing his meal.
You giggle lightly as the boy turns around, sandwich small in his big hands. His face still a little red as he took a bite.
"You're going to be hungry again in like an hour." You tell him playfully, watching his eyes twinkle when they meet yours.
Chewing, he took in your outfit.
You were wearing a light pink plaid skirt with a low cut black top.
You looked beautiful to him, the sound of your giggling through the air making him nervous.
Steve shakes the feeling off before shrugging.
"Then I'll order take out." He tells you, chucking slightly before taking another bite.
You nod, understanding. Your eyes roamed around the room to see if you could find any remnants of Robin around.
Not seeing anything you turn your stare back towards him.
"Where's Robin?" You ask him, frowning slightly because you thought they were both off tonight.
You see Steve's body soften a little bit at your question.
"She canceled on me, Vickie asked to see her. Which good for her actually, one of us deserved to have a fun night." Steve answers, taking the last bite of his sandwich.
Steve's heart pound as he brought his eyes back up to yours.
"Are you supposed to be on a date?" He asks you, praying it was canceled and you hadn't gone.
Your body tensed while a sigh slipped your lips, yours legs automatically kicking back and forth slightly.
"That's why I'm here. I wanted to tell both of you how horrible it was, and when I say horrible Steve, I mean horrible." You tell him, shivering at the thought of earlier.
Steve's head popped up a little bit as he tried to not look excited about the fact your date hadn't gone well.
While he was happy for that, he was also wondering what could of made it so bad.
He questioned if maybe he would have to go kick the guy's ass.
"I thought you were out with that one guy from science club? Um, Jackson or whatever." Steve says, smirking internally because he knew the guy's name. But didn't want to seem like he was that important to him.
It's not like he hadn't been questioning the last few days, multiple different times, what that guy had that he didn't.
Meeting your eyes with Steve's, you tap your fingers nervously on the counter.
"Jacob, his name was Jacob." You tell him, watching him nod.
"And I had gone on the date, but god I didn't expect it to go so bad so fast." You finish, cringing as you see Steve's brow crinkle.
"What do you mean?" Steve asks you, arms crossing his chest.
Your body langue continues to be anxious, your feet still swinging as you tilt your head back before taking a deep breath.
"I mean literally not even fifteen minutes into the date he was trying to feel up my skirt. Not to mention all the sexual advances he kept making and nasty things he was saying. The whole situation just made me uncomfortable." You tell him honestly, seeing Steve grimace.
He didn't want you to go out with anyone else, but you didn't deserve that to happen.
"He always seemed so um." Steve speaks, snapping his fingers for the word.
"Innocent?" You finish, watching him nod in agreement.
"That's the word." He says, pointing out a finger.
"That's why I agreed to go out with him, I thought maybe this one wouldn't be a pervert so fast in. Not that I'm even against sleeping with someone on the first date, but fuck at least let us get through dinner." You groan, eyes rolling.
"Did you get through dinner?" He asks while you shake your head.
"No, I told him I had to go to the bathroom then went to the register to pay, leaving to come here. Didn't touch my food or anything since it wasn't out yet." You say truthfully, you didn't want to risk waiting a second longer there.
Steve rolls his eyes playfully.
"You should of left him to pay for it." Steve chuckles, lifting his gaze to yours a smile on his mouth.
"I should of, but I just wanted out of there." You shake your your head, laughing lightly.
"I just want one good date, I legit haven't been a good first date in months." You sigh, looking down at your feet.
Steve sits there for a second staring at you, idea sparking in his head.
You were dressed for a date still, and he was dressed since he was originally supposed to hang out with Robin.
"Are you hungry?" He asks, raising an eyebrow, leaning his head back slightly.
"What?" You ask him, bringing your gaze to his.
"Are you hungry? Because you're right that sandwich didn't do anything." Steve shrugs, trying to be nonchalant.
You purse yours lips together for a moment.
"I could eat." You nod, watching him lean off the counter.
Steve smiles, nodding.
"Then lets go." He motions, holding his hand out to you.
Raising an eyebrow you take his hand, getting off the counter.
"Go where?" You ask, fixing your skirt.
You were confused on what Steve was doing, we're you two going to go out to eat? Get take out and come back here? What was on his mind, you wondered.
"Let's go show you that there are still good first dates in the world." Steve says seriously, grabbing his keys off the counter.
He decided even if he couldn't officially take you out without admitting his feelings, he could still show you what it's like. Friends show friends a good time right?
You freeze in place, wondering if you were dreaming.
"First date?" You squeak as he laughs, turning back towards you.
"Yes, date. Come on, friends can take each other out." He smiles at you.
"Now let me show you that even though you will have some bad dates, there will be good ones waiting for you." He finishes, motioning to the front door.
Standing there you see him standing tall, muscles sticking out of his blue stripped shirt while he held the door open for you.
It wouldn't hurt to let him show you a good time you thought.
After all friends can have friend dates, right?
"I guess I'm still dressed for it." You agree, following him as he goes to lock the front door behind you two.
Steve felt himself stumbling slightly to find the key before leading you to the car.
After all he had to make it seem like this wasn't as big of deal to him as it really was.
"Just sit back and enjoy the night because you're right, I have only heard you talk about how bad your dates have been lately. And you deserve a good one." Steve tells you, opening the passenger door for you to get in.
A blush comes across your cheeks while you take a seat.
"Already starting huh?" You tease, smile on your lips.
"Like I said, I'm going to show you a good first date." He smiles, closing the door behind you.
Steve starts driving, eventually pulling into a gas station down the road.
He didn't really need gas for what he had planned, but he needed an excuse to stop to get you something he would get you if he was taking you on a real first date.
"I need to get some gas before we go anywhere." Steve says, hopping out of the car leaving you to wait nervously.
You sat there, hand tapping on your thigh, wondering where tonight was going to take you two.
You've liked him for the past couple of years since working together at Scoops, not that you didn't think he was cute before that.
Just you guys never really spoke before in high school other than some small talk here and there.
You wondered if maybe you should stop this, not wanting to confuse yourself too much by not being able to keep a straight head after this.
You didn't want to lose him over a silly crush.
But you couldn't help but wonder if you should let it play through, because it could possibly be the closest thing you'll get to a real date with Steve Harrington.
Turning your head back towards the opening gas station door, out comes a smiling Steve with an arm behind his back.
Still smiling he opens the car door, leaning in.
Steve watched your face turn awestruck as he brought his arm around, a single red rose for you in his hands.
He tucks a piece of his hair behind his ear nervously after you take the flower from his hand.
You fingers lightly running over the petals delicately.
"Normally I would of got you flowers before hand, but this date caught me off guard." Steve chuckles, seeing you smile softly.
"Steve, you didn't have t-" You start, getting cut off by the boy protesting you to let the night just happen.
"(Y/N), like I said just sit back and relax and just enjoy the night. That way you'll remember to not settle for anyone's shit during another date you'll have." He tells you, getting out to pump the gas he bought.
Twirling the flower in your hand, you were a giddy mess.
Not even into the actual so called date yet, and it was already one of the best dates you've had.
No one had ever given you flowers on a date.
You've gotten some for a few holidays, after begging for them of course. But you had never experienced anyone willingly wanting to give you something so simple but so special.
Shaking off the butterflies in your stomach, you turn towards Steve after he gets back into the car.
"Thank you for this Steve." You tell him honestly, seeing his eyes glimmer as he starts the car.
Steve's heart exploded at how happy you were about the flower.
He would buy you all the flowers in the world if it meant to see you with that look on your face the rest of his life.
He couldn't wait for the rest of the night, knowing if you enjoyed this then you were going to have a great time tonight.
"Just wait till you see the rest of the date." Steve winks teasingly through the rearview mirror, pulling out of the gas station.
The drive was quiet besides the light humming from Steve as he listened to the music playing through the radio.
Both of you were as nervous as the other, unknowingly of course.
Steve drove out into a small town, smaller than Hawkins, about 20 minutes out.
He pulled into a little ma and pa pizzeria, the red glowing lights shining in the night as you took in the little brick building.
Steve was a gentleman as always, demanding to open the car door for you, which you gladly accepted.
You decided you were going to let yourself enjoy every minute of this, because deep down you hoped maybe he would enjoy it as much as you.
He lead you inside, both of you picking a small little booth in the corner as you waited for a waitress to arrive.
The place was small but cute.
All of the booths were hardwood with white and black checkered floor tiles underneath.
The walls were hardwood as well, red checkered table cloths giving the place a much needed pop of color.
There was even cute hanging lights above each table, giving them all a personal romantic glow.
Bringing your eyes to Steve, you smile.
"How often do you come here?" You ask him softly.
Taken aback a bit, Steve feels nervous wondering if you meant if he brough other dates here.
He wouldn't ever dare to bring anyone else here, besides Robin maybe. But other than that, no one was important enough to bring here other than you.
"By myself? Probably once a week, with anyone else? Never." Steve says honestly, watching your eyes widen a bit.
"Really? How did you find this place then?" You ask him, leaning your chin onto your hand.
Steve nods, taking a look at his hands before picking his arm to rest it on the table.
"It happened a few weeks after graduation actually." He tells you, not wanting to make eye contact.
"I uh had got in a really bad fight with my father about my future, or well lack there of according to him. And I took one of his many checkbooks, thinking about signing me a fat check and just leaving. I started to drive, not really caring about anything just being fueled by anger and ended up stopping here to breathe. Now the rest is history, and I've been coming here ever since." Steve explains, playing with his hands nervously.
He had never told anyone about that night.
Your heart aches for him, not having a good relationship with your parents either.
Not always seeing eye to eye on your future as well.
"Tell me you at least used his checkbook to buy your dinner that night?" You ask him, placing your hand on his.
Steve chuckles, bringing his eyes to yours.
"No, but I should have. It would of been the least he could do." Steve smiles, while you give him a light squeeze.
"Why didn't you ever tell me about that?" You say quietly, intertwining your hand with his.
"I think because until recently, I actually thought he was right." He says honestly, both of your hearts beating fast from the electricity running between your fingers.
You could swear if you let go then lightning would hit the lamp above you.
"Steve your father wasn't right at all, and I'm happy you didn't leave because if you would have then we wouldn't be here, and I can't stand the thought that you might not have came into my life." You tell him truthfully.
If he would of left, you would of been working at Scoops with who knows instead of Steve.
That summer set the path to where you two were today.
"Really?" He asks as you nod.
"Really." You smile, seeing your waitress approaching from the side.
Reviewing the menu took forever for both of you, Steve said everything he had tried previously had been great. And on top of that it was kind of late with it being about 7:30 when you arrived, and both of you not having really ate much earlier didn't help when deciding what to order.
But you two settled on a plate of mozzarella sticks to start with and a medium house special to share with extra green peppers.
The conversation over dinner was alive, no small talk having to happen at all since you two knew each other so well. There were no awkward pauses or laughs, it was fun and energetic.
It was a great change of pace for both of you, since both of you had been on dates that were more than less boring lately.
You two were laughing loudly as you walked out of the restaurant.
The leftover pizza box hugged against your chest while Steve opened your door for you again.
"Steve thank you for sharing this place with me and what it means to you. It was truly one of the better dates I've been on." You tell him as he takes a seat.
Mentally high-fiving himself, he was happy to know you enjoyed what he had planned so far.
But was lowkey hurt you thought that this was all to his date with you.
He looks over, pouting jokingly with a hand over his heart.
"Why are you talking like it's over? We still have more to do till it's done." Steve says, glimmer in his eyes.
"What do you mean there's more?" You ask him, hint of curiosity in your voice, watching the car back out of the parking lot.
"I mean, I don't only come here for the pizza. There's also an awesome ice cream parlor down the road that has the best malts. Which I know you love right?" He asks, already knowing the answer because you go to the ice cream shop in town every payday of yours.
"You're right, I do love a good butterscotch malt." You laugh, seeing a smile form on his face.
"Yeah so just let me do my thing and make sure you have a fun night okay? I hate to say it but you will probably be getting home late tonight because it's already almost nine." He nods, finger pointing over to the clock on the dash.
"You trying to get me to the spend the night Harrington?" You joke teasingly, turning your body so your crossed legs were facing him.
He was right, your mom locked the door at ten because she had to be up by four am and didn't want to be awakened by the door slamming.
If you weren't home by then it was up to you to find a place to stay, especially since you got your key privileges taken away years ago because you kept losing them.
Your mom is convinced someone who finds the silver key will somehow know it belonged to your front door.
"Hey, then it was a good first date." He says playfully, pulling into the gravel drive of what you guessed to be the ice cream shop.
"But yes, more than likely by the time we get home your mom will have the door locked. So you will probably have to crash at mine." Steve tells you truthfully, opening the door to get out of the car.
After looking over the menu you ended up ordering what you and Steve already knew you were going to, a butterscotch malt.
The girl at the window handed you two your malts before you sat down at one of the tables outside.
"So did you find this place the night you found the pizzeria?" You ask him, bringing the straw to your mouth.
"Uh no actually, I found this a few months later. I came out here to eat one night but decided I still didn't feel like going home so I went exploring the town a little more." He tells you, watching your eyes roll back as you taste the ice cream.
"You've been holding out on me Harrington, you've been coming here for a little over a year and didn't think to tell me their malts are better than ours?" You laugh, pointing your straw at him.
"I'm sorry, I'm sorry." He chuckles, hands and malt going to the air defensively.
"So I am really the first girl you brought out here?" You ask teasingly, brow raised.
"You are." He nods, pulling his straw away from his lips.
"I didn't want to take you on any other date I would take anyone else. Especially since I do know you, and know what you like so it's a little easier for me to think of something you would enjoy." Steve says honestly, seeing you blush lightly.
"Steve that is honestly so sweet, and you really don't know how much that means to me." You tell him, watching him stand up.
"Which is why I have one more thing to share with you before the end of this date." He smiles, taking your hand into his to follow him.
"What is it?" You ask him, feeling your heart beat as you talk quietly towards his car.
The feeling of your fingers intertwined for the second time that night, making you want to pass out.
"I didn't tell you anything else we were doing, why do you think I'll tell you now?." Steve chuckles, lifting his face slightly as he bumps his shoulder with yours.
"You're right," you agree while he sets his malt on top of the car so he can open the door.
Both of your fingers lingering when it comes time to let go.
The car ride home felt heavy with tension while you two wondered if you were imagining the tension in the air.
Steve wanted so badly to rest his hand on your thigh, and have you place your hand on top of his to hold him while you two drove back home.
But he wasn't sure if he would be crossing a line.
So he just longed for the feeling of your skin pressed against his.
Driving through Hawkins you glanced over at Steve, confused when his house came into view.
"Just trust me." He tells you, parking the vehicle.
Steve walks past you when you're inside, placing the pizza box on the counter along with the empty malt cups before motioning for you to follow him up the stairs.
Walking up to the hallway of his bedroom, you felt yourself get shaky.
He wasn't trying to get you in bed right?
Not that you would hate to do that, you thought.
But just you thought he would put more effort into it if this was really his goal.
"Steve?" You ask him, slowing your movements behind him.
Steve turns halfway back to see you glancing between him and his bedroom.
"Oh, no no no. It's not like that (Y/N), just keep following me." He chuckles, shaking his head.
He stops at the hallway window, messing around with the screen before it pops off.
"Come on," Steve tells you, placing the screen against the wall before climbing through.
Peering out you felt your heart beat fast as you climbed out onto the flat park of the roof to see Steve leaning back on the tiled roof by the window. Taking a seat next to him you lay down, arms behind your head looking at the stars above.
You two were towards the back of the house, the trees and pool surrounding you.
The reflection of the moonlight bounced off the pool, it was all dark besides the dimmed lights under the water of the pool.
It was peaceful out here, breathing in the fresh air.
"I would come out here during high school to just think sometimes." Steve shares, glancing over.
"It's beautiful, I would of too." You nod, happy he shown you more about him today.
"Well you can come whenever you need, bad date? Come here. Bad day in general? Come here." He shrugs slightly, sighing to himself as he realized the date was soon coming to an end.
"I might take you up on it sometime." You tell him, sitting up to glance down at the pool.
"You know where the spare is, and that my door is always open to you." Steve chuckles, sitting up.
"Is this the last part of the date?" You ask him, bringing your gaze back up to meet his.
"Yeah." Steve nods.
"How about I add something and we go for a swim?" You suggest, tilting your head towards the pool, seeing him raise an eyebrow.
"Are you wanting to go for a swim?" He asks you.
"Yeah, why not? It's a nice night." You shrug, smirking slightly.
"You don't have a swimsuit." Steve reminds you.
"So what? Literally I feel like a bikini is the same thing as my bra and underwear, just different materials." You laugh, standing up to go inside down to the pool.
Pulling off your shirt, you glance down at him.
"You coming?" You ask, seeing him get flustered.
"Ye-yeah" Steve stutters, standing up.
You were right he thought, it wasn't much different besides the materials.
Both of you make it down to the pool, kicking off your shoes before you let your skirt and shirt fall onto the cement.
"Meet you in there Harrington?" You smile, running to jump into the pool.
The water surrounded you as you submerged beneath. Your fingers keeping the air trapped in your lungs while they plugged your nose.
A gasp escapes your lips when you come back to the surface.
Steve was standing there with his shoes and jeans off, nervous about getting it to the water.
"Come on take off your shirt Harrington and get in the water." You call out teasingly.
"I'm coming, I'm coming." He laughs, reaching to pull the shirt off from behind his neck.
You start whistling and hollering as his torso becomes revealed, Steve's face turning red for the millionth time that night.
"You're been working out Steve." You tease, watching him jump into the water.
His tall frame disappearing into the water before coming back up.
"Is that way of you saying I look good?" Steve chuckles, shaking his hair like a dog, causing you to squeal from the water hitting you.
"Well duh, I have eyes. I'm not blind." You laugh watching him splash towards you.
Moving quickly, you scream at the cold water hitting your back.
"Hey, hey, hey. I said let's swim, not splash." You screech, trying to swim away.
"I think you're forgetting you're in the water with a guy who was on the swim team." He laughs, following while he splashes you more.
"Steve, stop." You laugh, turning back to splash him.
The sounds of both of you laughing and the water moving echoes into the open air.
"Never." He jokes, going to grab your arm.
"Steve don't you dare dunk me." You scream, feeling him overpower you while he pulls you close.
The feeling of his strong arms wrapped around you distracted you as he pulls you down with him in the water before bringing both of you back to the surface.
"God I hate you Harrington." You laugh, wiping the chorine filled water off your eyes.
"No you don't." Steve smiles, arms still wrapped around you.
"Steve, don't please." You scream again, feeling him spin with you in temptation while your arms automatically wrapped around his neck in fear.
"Okay, I won't. But did you at least have fun tonight?" Steve smiles, arms still holding you as he moves in the water.
"I did. Actually, I think it was the best first date I've ever been on." You say honestly, looking up to his eyes. His wet hair framing his face as his grin widens.
"You really think so?" He asks, looking down at you.
"I do." You nod nervously, feeling your back hit the wall of the pool making you realize you were still really close together.
"I wish it could of been like an actual first date though." You laugh shyly, one of your hands moving to rest on his chest while the other lingers on around his neck to play with his hair lightly between your fingers.
"Do you want to consider it an actual date?" Steve asks, chest moving harshly up and down under your finger tips.
"Would it be alright if I did?" You ask, biting your lip slightly.
"As long as you would let me take you out again," He smiles, his eyes twinkling while the water droplets rolled down his chest.
"On a date date right?" You ask, smirk forming.
"If I'm being honest, I was treating this as a date date." He tells you.
"I've liked you for a while (Y/N), but I was nervous about asking you out so I thought this was the only way it would happen." Steve continues honestly, picking you up a little higher.
"I've liked you for a while too Harington, and actually thought the same thing about this date. When you offered I thought this may be my only chance to get taken out by you." You smile, wrapping your legs tighter around him.
"Well how about we make up for lost time starting tomorrow with breakfast?" He asks, bringing his face down closer to yours.
"That works for me." You tell him, grinning into the kiss as your lips connect with his.
-----
Thank you for reading!
#steve harrington#steve harrington imagine#steve harrington x reader#steve harrington x you#steve harrington x female reader#Steve harrington flugg#steve harrington smut#steve harrington one shot#steve stranger things#steve harrington x yn#steve harrington fic#joe keery imagine#steve harrington x plus size reader#joe keery#joe keery x female reader
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Also getting back to the manhwas train I finally read debut or die which was?? Not at all like I was expecting?? But anyways, here are just my reactions (often kinda random) but I hope you read through and can figure out what's going on while finding it funny!
Also don't ask me which chapter it starts at because brother in arms I don't know either
EUGENE IS SO FUNNY
[VTIC Cheongryeo sunbae-nim: Call me if you feel like dying ^^]
- LMFAOOOO what
didn’t know where this dogsh*t idea came from. Does his pituitary produce saliva instead of hormones? It was fortunate that he was the type to be impressed by trivial interpersonal relationships.
- woah what went straight for the jugular
I never thought that the situation where I cried for the first time in nearly 7 years would be live in front of a camera with 13,000 people.
- AND AIN'T AFRAID TO CRY
- OR TREAT HIS MAMA RIGHT
“You didn’t have a trashy attitude back then, Moondae. You just worked hard even though you were sick. Chungwoo hyung was worried too.”
- Oml
[We have to lose!]
- Bless cha Eugene's heart
-- HE'S SAYING IT IN ENG
Hey, that’s scary. I’m scared.’
- Behold the intelligence of mcs
The company’s internal network structure is derived from T1.’
- HOLY SHIT THIS GUY'S DEDUCTING SKILLS IS CRAZY
- Have you considered a career in
- Forensic?
He also gave very American advice.
- LMFAO
I cheered as I reviewed the ten-day seclusion plan.
- FR
- secluded for 10 days sounds like the DREAM
‘I am so f*cking uncomfortable with it, you bastard.’
- Leave the poor man alone 😭
-- Is this..?
-- THE KIDNAPPING???
(- WHAT
Why don’t you try to commit suicide?”
- CRAZY BASTARD
-- He is now the kidnapper
--- Kidnappee turn kidnapper
Because I beat the sh*t out of him.”
- Amen
It’s okay. I won.”
- HELL YEAH YOU DID
The fact that I was injured enough to go to the hospital was funnier.
- WHAT STOP
- HE COLLAPSED
- WTF
- PLS REST
--
HE'S ACTUALLY SO MANIPULATIVE
-- USING THE SKILL
-- SUBTLY CHANGING THEIR THOUGHTS IT'S CRAZY
---
DO YOU REALLY WANNA WORK THAT HARD
Arent you drinking too much
- ONG was not expecting this to actually be a problem
You look tired these days!”
- OMG HE _IS_ AN UNRELIABLE NARRATOR
--
Oh no he got a SURPRISE BDAY PARTY
-- Woah so his actual one is 8 dec??
-- That's awfully close
---
WATCHING RED PANDAS IN THE CORNER OF HIS ROOM
--- SAUR CUTE
----
HIS GRANDMA IS AN OPP
---- I'M SORRY IT'S REALLY MEAN BUT GET IT TOGETHER GIRL
---- OMG CHA YUJIN INSISTING THAT HE STAY
---- URGHHH MY HEART
Self criticism should be done during spare time not when it's a nuisance
- I respect this man so much
like a brainless idiot
- STOP
- YOU ARE SMART
- AND AMAZING
- YOU JUST GIVE 200% AT THE WRONG TIMES
--
AW OMG HE CARES SO MUCH
-- BLESS RAEBIN
-- EVERYONE ACTUALLY
-- THEY ARE THERE FOR EACH OTHER SO MUCH
- - -
Woah wait so they're aiming for a Moondae is the the same person as bae sejin feel??
--- I am INVESTED in the mv lore
It doesn't matter if it was worse this time
- NO
- IT'S ALREADY SO BAD
- THE RECOIL SHOULD NOT GET WORSE
- THAT'S RIGHT SLEEP MORE
- JUST BECAUSE YOU HAVE BACCHUAS DOESN MEAN YOU DONT NEED SLEEO
--
OH NO
-- THE ACCIDENT
-- STOP
-- ARGHHH
-- WILL YOU REST PLEASE
-- OH THANK FUCK
---
WAIT
--- NO
--- NONONONO
--- STOP
--- NOT ALLT HE WAY BACK
--- Daydream??
( how desparate he is)
- OH MY FUCKING GOD
- SHOULD I JUMP OFFF
- NO
- OMG
- NO
--
OMG THIS REALISATION is Tearing me APART
rapid prayers in spanish
- the angst here is killing me
--
THANK GOD FOR NECTAR
-- 18 DAY COMA
OMFG
-- CHA YUJIN IS SAUR CUTE
-- BRIBED HIM WITH TANGEIRNES
-- HE'S SORRY
-- HE IS FORGIVEN
-- CHA YUJIN KEEPING QUIET ABOUT VTIC
-- AND BLACKMAILING MOONDAE
-- SO ADORABLE
---
FUNDRAISING
--- He's actually so sweet
--- PLS EVERYONE WAS CRYING
"do you think I'm some kind of sociopath"
- SEJIN NO
- THEYRE FRIENDS <333
- PLEASE I NEED THEM TO BE HAPPY
--
So the system is actively trying to help him??
---
TSRANDED ARC!!
--- Lights out :0
--- SAVE THE CHICKENS
--- The secret door is so ominous
--- Horror arc
--- OMG MOONDAE GOING wtf do I do??
--- SO REALL
--- WAS SO SCARED FOR A SECOND
----
THE MEETING
---- OMG
---- OMG
---- OMG
---- OMG
---- AHHHHHH
---- DID HE RUN AWAY???
---- I'M SO CONFUSED
---- BUT RGW IN THIS CONTEXT IS SO SWEET
HE TRIED TO COMMIT DEATH
- WHAT
- WHAT THE FUCK
- HUH
- IT ENDED LIKE THAT????
- No more abnormalities???
- WHAT
--
:OO A CONVO WITH OG PMD
Ah the need to be in control of every situation
- So valid
AND THEN MY TEXTS JUST END THERE SO...
anyways hope you had a laugh
And I really hope this fandom gets so much bigger than it is now :)
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Here I am back on my John Marston BS.
I pointed this out before ab how ppl loved calling John “watered down” but I’m also seeing people forget that he was also put on a very high fucking pedestal and had no idea how to handle it. In other words; he was the gifted kid who got burnt out after everyone expected everything from him. John never expected to be seen as such. He actually preferred to not be held to such a degree. I’m sick and tired of people feeding into the “John’s a golden boy” “John’s a piece of shit” narrative. Clearly these people have only seen RDR2 and have no clue about everything in RDR1 and yes I’m giving an attitude so y’all better catch it.
Here’s my John Marston character analysis and this is only about one aspect of him. (Wait until you see every other aspect bc I’ve literally dissected this man like a frog oops)
He never fucking asked for it. In fact, he didn’t expect jack shit from anybody. If anything, people used him. People used him up. You see it plainly in rdr1, he’s being used to hunt down his old partners. To find his old partners he’s gotta ask the sheriff, what does the sheriff do? He uses him to handle some lowlife gangs around the county. The sheriff ACCIDENTALLY—not even voluntarily—reveals someone that ends up somewhat helping him out. West Dickens—and what does he do? Uses him. Seth? Uses him. Travels over to another country, what do they do? USE HIM!
Okay, so rdr2—if you couldn’t get the picture already—John was one of Dutch’s MAIN PAWNS. That man raised John to USE HIM. John was young and had lots of energy and he was gullible enough to let Dutch do whatever with his naivety. The most fucked up thing about all of it, not only about how (almost) everyone saw him as a pawn, not as a genuine friend, saw him only for his uses;
John didn’t care. He knew he was being used but he didn’t care. Yes it bothers him and again he’s fully aware he’s being ran around in circles by all these people; it doesn’t matter. He sees himself as someone who is replaceable. He’s expendable. It’s whatever. He was always made to think this and perhaps he knew that it was his fate to be all used up and thrown out like it was nothing. And that’s what ended up happening.
No, he wasn’t a perfect father. He SHOULDVE done much much better about that. Just for that I let anti’s breathe a little because in Jack’s younger years, hell no John wasn’t a good father! John was in denial, busy trying to live up to his dreams of being someone he isn’t. On that note, John slowly realized that Abigail and Jack were probably the only ones that didn’t see him as a pawn; they just wanted him to be present and that causes him to do a 180. To him, it was worth dying for them. Maybe he felt as if he owed them a debt that could never be repayed—it’s almost like he expresses this to Jack a dozen different times. “I’m sorry, Son. I’m not going anywhere.” And “I know I wasn’t around a lot for you but I’m trying to make up for that”. He becomes viscerally aware of the damage of his absence (as he should) and it becomes something he fears he’ll never get to make up for.
Abigail never wanted to use him. She just wanted HIM. Jack—OF COURSE never wanted to use him, he wanted a FATHER. Honorable mention, but Arthur never saw him as a pawn either. In fact, he was well aware of how John was being treated, even mentioning it to him canonically, along the lines of, and I’m loosely quoting this, “At first you’ll be a prize pony until you become a work horse”. These people become so important to John—among others such as Bonnie, Charles, Sadie, even Uncle—because they never tried to use. him. John was more than expendable to them, he was worth something to them and for that he loved them and felt as if he would owe them for eternity.
I truly can’t believe some of y’all completely miss that whole point because it’s written EVERYWHERE it’s literally how John’s story goes and we experience it with him. His story is so fucking tragic and yes, while Arthur was the prime example of “having a doomed narrative from the start”, people don’t talk about how John is literally in the same boat. That man was always doomed, by his friends, the people he would try to call family—he was raised all the way up just to be put down…. THAT’S the story of John fucking Marston.
#sry Dutch Stan’s I didn’t even mean to shit on him like that I actually love y’all#I saw a post saying wild shit ab John and I just had to clear the air#John anti’s dni#number 1 John Marston defender and protector beside Arthur Morgan#john marston#rdr#rdr2#red dead redemption 2#red dead redemption#text#character analysis
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FINDING YOU Chapter 12
Summary: You're in a relationship with Steve Rogers, but his best friend just always seems to be around!
Word Count: 5.7k
Warnings: smut ... eventually, I promise
MASTERLIST
CHAPTER 12
Bucky spent another week in the hospital but it didn’t take long before the nurses were refusing to enter his room. The surgeons were skittish when they came to deliver the news of his progress. The only people he was civil with were you and Steve, but barely.
"Bucky, your dressing is stained. Why wasn't it changed this morning?"
Bucky shrugged. “They don’t really come in here much.”
“Why?”
Bucky held up his arm. “They probably know who I am.”
“What? Why should that matter?”
You were outraged, how dare the staff not treat Bucky because of his past. “I’m going to go and sort this out.” You started walking towards the door.
“Ace!” Bucky called after you to stop. “Wait! Don’t do that.”
“Why? This isn’t acceptable.”
“It’s not their fault. I didn’t want them to do it.”
“What do you mean, Buck? Why not?”
“It doesn't matter, it will heal,” he answered dismally.
“It will scar!”
“I have plenty already, another one doesn't make much difference.”
“Bucky, you have to take care of yourself! What’s going on?”
“They keep wanting to do tests and they won’t say why. You said you’d be here.”
“Oh Buck.” Your heart clenched at what he was telling you. Surgeons had never been very communicative when it came to explaining medical procedures, their usual attitude was very commanding. Naturally Bucky wouldn’t have responded very well to this, he must be scared of being used by another organization in the same way he was used by HYDRA, and to some extent even the US Army. “I’m sorry. Why didn’t you tell me when I called you?”
“You were busy.”
“And yet you’re mad at me because I didn’t come to see you.”
He didn’t answer, but he didn’t deny your observation.
“I’m sorry. I left the kids for five days after the explosion. There’s a lot going on with them. I’ve been at the Academy all day and half the night for the last few days. I feel like I haven’t slept in years. Sorry.”
“You should sit.”
“No, someone needs to change this dressing. And did they empty your chest drain today?”
“I assume that’s the big ass tube sticking out of my chest?”
“Yeah, this container on the floor here. Did someone empty that today?”
“I don’t think so.”
“It means that it needs to be taken out,” you sighed. “Fucking surgeons!”
“Hey, it’s ok, calm down.”
You hated how emotionally out of control you felt in that moment, the exhaustion was starting to take its toll. Bucky had known you long enough that he could tell what you were feeling.
“Are you patronizing me?” you asked with a trembling lip.
“I would never!” Bucky couldn’t quite hide his smile.
“Jerk!” you gave him a watery chuckle. “Bucky, I-”
“It’s alright.”
“I wanted to be here.” Who’s guilt were you trying to assuage?
“I know.”
“I’m going to get someone to-”
“Do you have to? Why can’t you do it?”
“Buck, I’m not your doctor.”
“I know, but you know how. And I trust you.”
“Because Buck, I’m too tired to be doing any kind of medical procedure. How about I get them, but I’ll be right here and talk you through it? How’s that?”
“Fine.”
“Once we get that out, hopefully we can get you out of this dump. And by dump, I mean it’s actually an incredible facility.”
You were able to get the attention of a resident and nurse who were able and brave enough to enter Bucky’s room. You explained to Bucky that his chest drain was inserted because he had a punctured lung which had collapsed. In order to relieve the pressure and reinflate the lung, he needed the drain. Now that there was no fluid draining, it was ready to be removed. It was a relatively simple act of pulling out the tube and throwing in a stitch to close the incision made to insert the tube. You wrapped your fingers around his as they started, he squeezed your hand slightly as they physically removed the tube and pushed his skin back together.
“There you go,” the resident said, patching a dressing over the fresh wound. “You might have a small scar, but nothing quite as gnarly as those.” He motioned to the scars surrounding Bucky’s vibranium arm.
Bucky scowled, his fist clenched. He looked ready to punch the junior resident.
“Thank you doctor. Why don’t you go and start arranging Sergeant Barnes discharge papers?”
“Oh, I don’t think he is ready-” the resident started, before you interrupted him.
“Could you speak with your attending please? I’m sure that they would very much appreciate the bed space.” The resident stared at you blankly. “Go, now, please?”
“Thank you!" you called after him as he left.
"I think you scared him," Bucky grinned at you.
"I shouldn't have done that," you sighed heavily, sitting down on the edge of the bed. Your eyelids were feeling more and more heavy.
Bucky shuffled over on the bed to make some space for you to sit more comfortably.
"Ace, you look exhausted. I know I was a bit of an idiot about you not coming to visit but you should probably go home and sleep."
"Is that your way of saying I look like crap?"
"I think you always look beautiful."
You blushed, not quite knowing how to respond. Kiss him, your brain screamed at you. Why couldn't your brain carry out one simple executive function? Instead you decided to change the subject
"Bucky, we have to talk about how you go home."
"What's the problem?"
"You don't even have a bed in your apartment!"
"I'll just sleep on the floor. It will be fine!"
"With a broken leg?"
"I've had worse injuries and survived just fine."
"Buck, that's not funny."
"Hey, I fell out of a train and into a frozen ravine. Only lost one limb."
"Well I'd rather you didn't lose another."
"Don't worry about me."
"Of course I worry about you. Especially when you go and do dumb things like letting a building fall on you!"
"Hey, come on. Sit down for a minute. Stop trying to look after everyone."
He was the only person who called you out for helping others. He was the only one who got you to slow down, to take time to take care of yourself. He took care of you. And you loved him for it. You loved him.
Bucky patted the bed. "Sit!"
Instead of perching on the side, you kicked off your shoes and squeezed yourself in beside him, shoulder to shoulder. You heaved a sigh of relief, the weight of your own body had more of a burden than you thought.
"Better?" he asked. He was always so gentle with you.
"It's always better when I'm with you, Buck."
You laid your head on his shoulder, eyelids feeling heavy. The pillow was surprisingly comfortable, as was Bucky's shoulder. It would be alright if you rested with him for a few moments before you headed home.
However, the draw of slumber was too much for you. You'd spent many a night in a hospital bed in the past but never had you felt so comfortable in the company of another person in such close proximity. It wasn't long before your head was buried in the crook of Bucky's neck with you snoring softly, lost to Morpheus's beckoning. Even the knock on the door wasn't enough to free you from his clutches.
"Hey Buck. I know it's late but-" Steve stopped short as he noticed your presence and Bucky's shushing gestures.
He chuckled softly at Bucky's gestures.
"She's been burning the candle at both ends."
"Yeah," Bucky sighed. He had started to feel guilty about his surly behavior.
"Want me to take her home?"
"I guess she'll be more comfortable there." It was a disappointing conclusion.
As if to voice your objection, you rolled over, still fast asleep, wrapping your arm around Bucky's and nestled your face further into his shoulder.
"Looks like she disagrees," Steve smiled at you fondly.
"Do you mind pulling up the rail? Just in case."
Steve obliged with Bucky's request. He also grabbed an extra blanket from the shelf and covered you with it, taking special care to cover your feet.
"She gets cold," Steve explained. "Take care of her."
Bucky was taken aback by the tenderness in Steve's voice.
"Hey pal?"
"Yeah Buck?"
Bucky wondered if Steve still loved you. In fact he feared it. What if he was hurting his best friend? He was so close to a happiness he hadn't felt in years, so close that he was afraid of breathing and blowing it all away. But he owed it to Steve to ask.
"Are you alright?"
"Yeah. I'm sure the two of you will be happy together. I couldn't ask for anything more." He smiled sadly at his friend. "Just don’t blow it like I did."
“Steve…”
“You deserve to be happy, Bucky. You both do.”
“Thank you.”
“You should get some sleep too. Night.”
Steve left you fast asleep by Bucky’s side. For the first time in what felt like an eternity, Bucky allowed himself a moment to relax, to savor what he had rather than mourning what he had lost. He relished the way your hand was wrapped around his bicep, how you held him close to your chest. Even though Steve had all but confirmed that you reciprocate his feelings, he knew better than to rejoice until he heard it straight from the horse’s mouth. But he allowed himself the hope.
For the briefest of moments his impatience had him considering shaking you awake but dare he ask such a direct question? No. Instead he reclined the bed slowly in an attempt to sleep. The motion made you stir, but instead of waking, Bucky felt you move your arm so that it was wrapped around his torso. He closed his eyes and let the darkness surround him.
You woke in the early hours of the morning, having slept for almost twelve hours. When you opened your eyes, the first thing you saw was Bucky's bearded face. It was a breathtaking sight. As you gathered your senses, you realized, not only were you an inch from his face, but you were staring. And was your arm really where you thought it was? It was so intimate for someone who you'd never discussed intimacy with.
As gently as you could, you took your arm off his chest, fingers lingering for the briefest of moments over the dressing where his chest drain had been removed. You checked his face to look for signs of waking before you sat up. You turned away to try and untangle yourself from the blanket that was stuck between your legs and the bed rail when you felt a warm hand around your forearm.
“Bucky!” you whispered with surprise and a hint of panic. “I didn’t mean to wake you. Go back to sleep.”
“Don't go.”
His voice was low, so low that you weren’t quite sure you heard him.
“What?”
“Don't go.” He repeated.
“Bucky, I-”
“Stay.”
He tugged on your arm and you conceded, resting back on your elbow.
“I want you to stay.”
“I’m here, Buck.”
He took your free hand and guided it to his chest, coming to rest over his heart. “Here,” he whispered, not once taking his eyes off you.
The way his eyes shone in the darkness drew you closer to him and you leaned over him. It was now or never. You moved down towards him, your lips brushed over his, noses rubbing together, you heard Bucky’s breath hitch slightly. For a second you thought about pulling back, but his hands were around your waist, holding you close and he raised his head keeping your lips pressed together.
It wasn’t like any other first kiss you’d ever had. The longing you felt from Bucky was unlike anything you’d experienced and you didn’t want it to end.
The scientists who had administered the supersoldier serum to Bucky in 1943 had been extremely talented. The rate at which he was healing was downright miraculous. The surgeons removed the Ilizarov frame from his broken leg and the only thing that kept Bucky from jumping off the bed was your hands on his chest. These frames were often in place for 6 months, he had only had it on for 6 days but his x-rays were showing solid callus formation on the healing bone.
“We suggest you avoid weight bearing for at least another week.” The surgeon had advised Bucky’s scowling face. “But there is no reason you need to remain in the hospital any longer.”
He reluctantly took the crutches handed to him but used them under your watchful supervision. Steve was ready to drive Bucky home and he dropped both of you off at his apartment.
“Thanks Ace. I got this from here,” Bucky said, his hand on the door knob.
“Oh.” You felt confused. “Buck, is this because of the file thing?” you asked sorrowfully.
“No.” He propped his crutch up against the wall and cupped your face in his hand. “It’s not. I… it’s stupid. I know you’ve already been inside. It’s just not very … well furnished.”
“I remember. So don’t be mad, but-”
“What did you do?”
“You don’t have anywhere to sleep. It’s not good for your leg. So I asked Steve and Sam to bring my couch here for you. It’s a pull out, so you can sleep on it. I hope that’s ok?”
“I guess it'll be better than the floor.” He conceded. He turned back to the door and opened it, nodding at you to follow.
The boys had done well, having expanded the couch and made up a bed in the living room in front of the TV.
“I would have bought you a bed, but well…”
“That’s a bit presumptuous, don’t you think, Ace?” He had a hint of a smirk and the tiniest flutter of a wink.
Was he flirting with you?
You blushed under the intensity of his gaze. You felt a surge of blood course through your body, a rush of fluid between your legs. It wasn’t that you hadn’t considered it before, it was that you’d never considered it was possible. Now here you were, alone with him and you felt afraid. Not afraid of him, but of the world it would open, the vulnerability and the potential of pain that came with it.
“Ace?”
“Yeah?” His voice snapped you out of your train of thought.
“Everything ok?”
“Yeah. Why don’t you go sit down. I’m going to see what food you have so we can have some lunch.”
“I’m not sure you’re going to find much in there, other than takeout menus.”
You sighed and shook your head, peering into the empty fridge. “Right, takeout it is!"
"Ace, you know you don't have to do all this."
"Seriously, Buck?"
"Yeah." He looked a little taken aback by your incredulity.
"This is coming from the guy who sulked because I didn't visit him for two days!"
"I wasn't sulking." Sullenness written all over his face.
"Yeah, just like you're not sulking now," you teased.
His lower lip protruded slightly as you teased him. You took the menus and sat down on the arm of the couch right next to Bucky. You twisted your legs over so your feet rested on the other side of his lap.
"It's a good thing you look cute when you pout like that. I don't know how any of the nurses managed to control themselves."
It took a moment for him to process your words and it was satisfying watching his features light up.
"You think I'm cute?"
"It's a strong possibility." You tried your hardest to convey an air of nonchalance.
Without warning Bucky wrapped his hand around your ankles and gave them a good tug, sending you flying off the arm of the couch straight into his lap with a loud squeal.
"Careful, flattery will get you everywhere with me."
"Bucky, what the hell! Your leg!" You tried to scramble out of his lap, worried about your weight on his broken limb.
You didn't get far, Bucky was holding you far too close for you to escape. "Hey, stop, it's okay."
When you succumbed to his embrace you realized just how close you were. Your breath was faster than it should have been and it wasn't because of the struggle. The thumping of your heart in your chest was palpable and you knew Bucky could hear it too. There was something inside your chest that seemed to want to get out, an urge deep inside you which you'd felt ever since you'd found him lying lifeless under the building. Tentatively, you reached up, fingertips grazing the rough stubble sprouting across his beautifully sculpted jawline.
"I don't want to hurt you," you whispered.
He reached up, tucking the stray strands of your hair behind your ear. "I know you wouldn't hurt me, Ace."
You'd been treating him like he was made of glass, that he would break at the slightest touch, but the Bucky you'd come to know, the Bucky you'd come to love, he was anything but fragile. Your Bucky was strong, he was resilient, he was loyal and most importantly he was yours.
"How can you be so sure?" you asked, not taking your eyes off his soft gaze.
He was barely an inch from your face, you could feel his breath against your lips and it was intoxicating. It would be so easy to fall onto his lips but something in his eyes stopped you. It felt like he was gazing so deep into your soul that you had no secrets left to keep from him. The icy fire in his winter blue eyes seemed to burn brighter than anything you'd ever seen, filled with so much passion and desire that you felt yourself clench with anticipation.
"Why don't you see for yourself?"
"What?"
"Use your abilities, check for yourself."
You felt slightly disappointed, he wasn't after something more intimate. He let you climb off his lap and you felt a cold shiver where his warm arms had enveloped you. Crawling to the end of the couch, you came to rest in a kneel at his feet.
"Go on, Ace," he smirked.
Was he flirting again?
Slowly you put your hands on his leg, fingertips at first, reaching out with your senses. It was almost like you could feel the vibrations coming from the molecules and atoms which gave Bucky his very essence. And if you closed your eyes and felt deeper, it was as though the electrons buzzed happily at you. You wondered if this is what it had been like to fall into the quantum realm.
Instead of vibing with the electrons, you pulled yourself back, giving you a bigger picture of what was happening inside him. Your palms now rested against his shin and fingers now wrapped around his muscular calf as you explored the sinew and bone beneath his flesh. Your senses crept between the muscle fibers and down to his bone. You could feel the cracks that had already started to heal, the calluses that had formed holding the pieces together with surprising strength.
You smiled, looking up at Bucky with excitement about his speed of healing, but you were shocked to see him leaning back against the sofa, eyes closed, mouth parted slightly and his hands pressed against the cushioned mattress.
You took your hands off his flesh like you'd been burned. "What happened? What's wrong?" you asked, panicking.
Bucky opened his eyes to look at you. "Nothing’s wrong, Ace. You gotta chill." He held out his hand and beckoned you to come closer.
"Did I hurt you?"
"No."
"It felt… warm." He paused, trying to find the right words for the sensation he had experienced. "It's like… when the doctors inject stuff into you, and you can feel it rushing through your veins."
The comparison made your heart sink, that your powers reminded him of how he was treated by HYDRA. Bucky noticed the change in your features immediately.
"It wasn't always a bad thing, you know. Usually it came with the welcome relief of sleep. The bad things all went away. When I felt that I knew it came with some peace." He reassured you with a squeeze or his hand. "You can keep going, you know."
"You like it?" you asked with a slight waver in your voice.
"Sweetheart, I love it."
The twinkle in his eyes and the half smirk he offered you made you blush profusely and sent a rush of arousal through you. The way he called you sweetheart made you dizzy with delight and he knew it. Bucky had always been able to read you like a book, your highs and your lows and now you would start a new chapter together.
You'd crept closer to him, hands on each of his thighs, pushing down with your fingertips, your powers weaving down through each layer of skin, muscle and bone. Slowly you moved your hands up towards his body, watching his face intently. He never took his eyes off you as you edged closer and closer, hand slipping under the material of the shorts he had on. You were mere inches away when his eyes finally fluttered slightly, giving in to the pleasure he felt. The pleasure you gave him. The thought thrilled you.
He moaned, putting his hands on yours to stop your ascent. "Maybe we should take our time? I-"
"Of course, Buck." You smiled. The last thing you wanted was to make him uncomfortable and ruin things by getting carried away.
"I think you should finishing making sure that I'm fit for duty. Complete physical examination. Isn't that right?"
"Are you telling the doctor how to do her job?"
"Wouldn't dream of it."
"I might need to get a little closer, we need to start from the top."
Obligingly Bucky dropped his legs so you could straddle them, letting you perch on his thighs. Your core ached for attention but you needed to show restraint having agreed to take things at his pace. Instead you put your hands on his face, palms cupping the sides, as your thumbs caressed his cheekbones.
"I think you should come even closer." His tongue flitted out over his lips, before he raked his teeth over them.
"Yeah?" you asked.
Bucky’s hands left your hips and moved up to the back of your neck, pulling you forwards into a kiss. The moment his lips met yours, your mind was reeling. You had a vague idea from Steve that Bucky had very much been a charmer but you hadn't thought about it much further, but now you knew with certainty that he had the skills to back his bravado. There was a suaveness to the way he slipped his tongue into your mouth. It made you wonder what other wonders it could manage and that thought made you moan.
Bucky broke the kiss. "You like that?"
You felt giddy and oh so aroused. Eager to regain that feeling you lent back towards him but he held you back, hands on your shoulders.
"What do you say about moving on a little?"
You nodded.
"What else were they worried about in the hospital?"
"There were a few lacerations on your arm," you said, taking his right hand between both yours.
You worked your way up to his shoulder, both of you reveling in the way it made you feel. Your fingers danced over his right clavicle, then over to his left, eyes never straying from each other. You edged closer to his left side and for a moment you considered moving down his torso, but the vibranium was a part of him and you wanted him to know you accepted that part of him, loved that part of him equally. As you reached out to the cool metal, everything changed. You are in awe of the complexity of the mechanics that made the prosthetic work. There was a beauty in the way the gears moved, simultaneously, in conjunction with each other to initiate the smallest of movements. You smiled, fascinated by the novel technology.
"You seem to be enjoying that," Bucky brought your attention back to him.
"Can you feel this?" you asked.
He shook his head.
"I'm sorry."
"Don't be. But maybe we can focus on something else now?" He cocked his head to one side.
"Right away, Sergeant." You placed both palms on his chest. "I think we can progress better without the shirt, what do you think?"
"I hope you aren't taking advantage of me" He pulled off his fitted black t-shirt.
"I wouldn't dream of it, Buck," you said as you raked your eyes over his well defined abs.
"Come now, let's not get distracted."
You brought your eyes back to his, face flushed with embarrassment.
"Sorry."
"Not to worry, it happens to the best of us. Now, tell me what's going on here," he held your hands against his chest.
The synchronicity of his healing ribs expanding as he took a breath and inflated his lungs was exquisite. You checked in, making sure that the sensations weren't too overwhelming.
"Lungs seem to be in order," you declared.
"What else?"
You didn't need powers to feel how hard his heart was beating in his chest. "May I?"
He nodded.
You needed to be careful, the smallest of nudges could lead to an arrhythmia or a stunned pericardium. Bucky mistook your caution as hesitation.
"You okay?"
"Yeah. Have to be careful, don't want to create any new problems."
"I trust you." His eyes told you he spoke the truth.
Taking a deep breath, you closed your eyes, reaching into his chest. You could feel the way his heart contracted and relaxed, like clockwork, bounded yet infinite, leaping from beat to beat. It reminded you of a repeating musical frequency, the same notes repeating and rejoining in a Fibonacci sequence. You had never felt so close to another human being as you did in that moment and the beauty brought tears to your eyes.
"What's wrong?"
"Nothing, it's perfect."
Bucky chuckled, wiping away the tear that slipped down your cheek. "I think you're stealing my lines! Can't have you using my best material."
"How do you propose to stop me?"
"That one's easy." He looked at you mischievously before he slipped his hands behind your thighs and pulled you right up against his chest.
You barely had time to gasp before his lips were back on yours. Hungrier than before, craving the intimacy he had finally had the permission to have. As your tongues danced together, you could feel his arousal pressed against yours. The thin material of your leggings and his shorts didn't leave much to the imagination. Reflexively you pushed your hips forwards against his, eliciting the most carnal moan you'd heard.
His hands had been stroking your back over the baggy shirt but they were seeking the feel of your flesh. Bucky tugged at the hem of your shirt, lifting it over your torso. You raised your arms, breaking the kiss briefly to allow him to pull the shirt over your head, knocking your glasses askew in the process.
"Sorry," he straightened them before pulling you back into the kiss.
Your hands explored each other's bodies, getting to know each other in a new way. Bucky flicked off the clasps of your bra with so much ease that you wondered if you had even fastened it correctly that morning. He took care to be gentle as he slipped off the straps, over your shoulders, around your elbows and off your wrists. He tossed the undergarment over the back of the couch.
"Don't think we'll need that anymore."
You laughed and your unclad breasts danced as your chest moved. Bucky's eyes were transfixed. The undivided attention was making you feel self conscious and you crossed your arms in an attempt to feel less exposed.
"You don't have to hide from me, Ace." He tucked away the hair which covered your face, making sure he could see your eyes.
Slowly you lower your arms, letting him take his fill of you, just as he had let you see his.
"May I?" He requested permission to touch you.
"Please."
His eagerness was seductive. As was the way he pinched and rubbed your hardened nipples. Your underwear was already soaked and it was sure to extend through your leggings if he kept this up.
"Hey, Ace?"
"Hmmm, Buck?"
"I think the ladies might be feeling a bit left out. You think I can give them a bit more attention?"
"What kind of attention?"
He licked his lips in the most seductive manner.
"By all means,” you swallowed hard. “I'm sure they would be thrilled."
It only felt like seconds before his mouth was latched on your nipple, nibbling, sucking until you were writhing in his lap. Letting go only when he was afraid he might accidentally fall from the edge as you bucked against his hips.
"Bucky, please."
"Please, what?”
“Don’t be like that.”
Bucky laughed in a low and lascivious way. This time when he kissed you, there was no holding back. He swept his hands under your thighs, hooking them in and pulling you as close as he could. You held his face, pushing your hands through his hair and cupping the nape of his neck.
Without warning you felt Bucky lean forwards, still holding you tightly to him, his erection pushing hard against you. He rocked up onto his knees and lowered you down onto the bed. Only when you're flat on your back that he loosened his grip on your legs and immediately slipped his fingers into the hem of your leggings, trying to tug them down. You could see his mental struggle between gaining access to your core and having to take the pressure off his own. At this point, desperation had you fumbling with his shorts and neither of you seemed to be getting anywhere.
"Buck, just… stop for… a second," you panted between his open mouthed kisses.
Bucky froze in surprise.
"Just take them off… quickly!" your voice was pressured.
Bucky snorted at your urgency, feeling slightly relieved that you didn't want to stop completely. He pushed down his shorts and boxers while you did the same with your clothing. As you tossed aside the offending items your eyes went back to him, lingering on the sizable swelling he was sporting. His eyes met yours in apprehension.
"Well? What are we waiting for?" you demanded.
He couldn't stop smiling as he put his mouth back on yours. His body weight pressed down on you, his erection rubbed against your lips. Without you realizing Bucky slipped his hand down and you gasped when cold metal pressed down on your clit.
He gave you a few gentle strokes before plunging his fingers between your folds, collecting the slickness that had accumulated between your legs. You held your breath as you watched him smear it across his throbbing length, mixing it with the precum that was already flowing from his tip. His right hand remained firmly pressed against yours, his thick fingers interlaced between your dainty digits.
Bucky gave himself a few rough strokes before looking for your entrance. He pushed your legs apart with his knees and lined himself up. Bucky looked at you for permission before slipping between your folds, teasing you with his tip.
“Fuck Bucky, just get in me!”
He grinned and it made you feel delirious. You felt dizzy as he stretched you inch by inch, every movement elicited an exquisite wave of pleasure as he filled you completely. Bucky leaned forwards, letting go of your hand and supporting himself with his elbows just above your shoulders. He lay still for a moment while he waited for you to adjust. Your eyes met and he rubbed his nose against yours.
"You good?" he breathed.
"Great!"
He didn't need further encouragement, he pulled out slowly and thrusted back into you with a bit more speed and force than before. You moaned, yearning for more. Your hands found the small of his back, fingers digging into his skin desperately trying to bring him closer.
Bucky pushed his knees out, spreading your legs further and you hooked your knees over his thighs, using them as an anchor to thrust back. Your hands found purchase on his ass, as you tried to get him to move faster. The only thing that interrupted the sounds of his skin slapping against yours was the insatiable moans from your mouths.
The bucking of his hips had gotten more and more erratic and you knew he was close. You had a fleeting thought that he may finish before you, but Bucky seemed to know just what to do. He twisted his hips and you cried out ecstatically as he found that special place that would have you unraveling in mere moments.
"Buck," you muttered his name breathlessly between moans. "Faster, I'm-"
He can only growl in response, holding you closer, tighter, fucking you harder and harder until you saw stars. Your orgasm coursed through your body, it spread through you like lightning, permeating every fiber of your being.
Your walls fluttered around him pushing him to the brink of ecstasy. His thrusts became more and more erratic as you tightened around him.
"Bucky!" you gasped.
The sound of his name from your lips in euphoria was what made him pulse inside you. Arching his back, Bucky spilled his hot milky load into you. He panted heavily, mouth still on yours as he recovered his composure.
He rolled over to his side, pulling on your leg so you rolled with him, remaining inside you. Your head rested on his arm and he ran his vibranium fingers through your hair. You caressed his chin lovingly. Everything in that moment felt perfect.
#bucky barnes x reader#buckybarnes x you#bucky barnes fan fiction#bucky barnes x female reader#bucky barnes smut#finding you
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Ok- I saw your stuff and I couldn’t believe you only had three things hshsjjdb
Do you mind an enemies to lovers type thing with pink haired sonic and the hedgehog dude? (Aka. Chigiri and Barou lmao) The reason they beef can be anything you want-
If you’re taking anons- I wanna be 👺 anon pls and ty, it’s ok if you aren’t too lol
CHIGIRI and BAROU + enemies to lovers!
content. just them arguing with the reader (slight sad in chigiri’s part) + gender neutral pronouns used | small scenarios + some hcs
author’s note. hi babe! I’d love to have an anon! believe it or not, but in like 3 years on tumblr no one has ever asked it to me <3 however, i hope you like these headcanons!
(i made them extra long to excuse myself for the long waiting, please forgive me :( )
CHIGIRI HYOMA
you were friends at first, but then the whole injury thing happened.
“why would you give up? a lot of famous players have had injuries in the past, but they still managed to come back! why would you throw your dream in the trash bin like that?”
“you’ve never understood me, then”
after expressing your opinion on why he shouldn’t give up on his dream while he can still play, you started arguing for everything.
it was heartbreaking to see: you, his best friend since childhood, being treated like a complete stranger.
even more heartbreaking was the fact that you liked him and you couldn’t stand the way he was giving up on his lifetime dream.
chigiri absolutely hates you when you’re right.
you started to avoid him and he started to avoid you. it was a mutual thing.
he actually hoped for you to come back, because he realised he acted like a baby.
however, he hasn’t even seen you for months.
chigiri fucked up, completely.
you meet again at a café (unplanned, you’re still not sure how to behave towards him)
“oh, y/n, hi” he mutters with his coffee in hand.
“what do you want?” it wasn’t supposed to come off that harsh, however, chigiri’s face changes expression.
“nothing” he wants to slap himself.
“do you have a minute?” you ask, sitting at a table in the corner “we have to talk and you know what i’m about to say, i guess”
he sits down and huffs.
“i’m kinda tired. we were best friends before the injury thing, and now we look like we spoke once in our lives” you say, keeping your voice as low as possible “your behaviour is annoying”
he knows you’re right, so he just murmurs a “i’m sorry”
you keep up talking “i was really upset when you told me those horrible things. i felt betrayed”
chigiri wasn’t expecting it to be this bad. he totally fucked up.
“I’ll get straight to the point, i had and probably still have feelings for you, but i don’t know if i should follow my heart or my brain right now, because you acted like a bitch with me”
oof, OOF.
“i am very sorry, y/n. i don’t know what i was thinking when i said that. i was too scared of hurting myself again and i almost gave up on my dream. it was stupid, i know you were right, but i didn’t want to accept it”
you breathe in deeply. “i accept your excuses, i’m sorry too. i shouldn’t have pushed that conversation that far”
“but you were right. during my time in blue lock, one of my friends told me the same things you told me back then. i realised that i was the one at fault.”
you nod “i’m happy you will continue to follow your dream. i’m sure you’ll be successful”
chigiri gives you a soft smile, making your heart melt.
“so we’re friends again” you say.
“actually… staying without you all this time was hard” he confesses.
“so you’re asking me…”
“yes, i’m asking that”
he laughs when he sees you blushing.
“i have a couple of days off, what do you think about going on a serious date before i go back to blue lock?”
“i’d love that”
BAROU SHOEI
this bitch
when he accepted to move into a new apartment for university he was prepared for anything, he thought.
you’re his polar opposite: messy, loud, extrovert, creative. the living copy of phoebe buffay.
“why are your clothes on my side of the room? is it that difficult to put your things in your side?” and he points the coloured tape that divides the floor in two halves.
(it was your idea to put it down, so he wouldn’t argue with you)
“the space on my floor was finished, i took a bit of yours”
this man is about to jump from the window.
you actually find his exaggerate reactions absolutely funny.
you leave your stuff around the house on purpose, just to see him getting mad.
barou, in reality, loves cleaning, so he is actually satisfied when everything is back to its place.
however, he is quite unreadable, and you think he hates you for the mess you always leave inside the apartment.
suddenly, one of your friends asks if you want a room near your university.
obviously, living closer to your department is better than living where you’re now, since public transport is often crowded or late.
when you leave he’s in paradise.
or at least he thought.
despite the first few days, barou actually misses your mess.
his days are pretty empty without picking up your stuff and cleaning your shared room.
he thought he hated you for that, but he loved cleaning your bedroom.
and that’s why he calls you after a couple of weeks “can you come back, please?”
you’re astonished. why would he want you to move back to his apartment? is he the same person that got mad every time you left something out of place?
“why?”
“well… I…”
is the king barou admitting his feelings?!
he misses you a lot.
“i miss your mess, now i’m always bored after studying, i have nothing to clean up”
“wait” you say, trying to connect the dots “i thought you hated me for my messiness?”
“i thought i hated you too”
“thanks?? how should i answer to that?”
“with a <<yes, I’ll move back to your apartment>>” he laughs
“okay then”
HE DID IT!
now you’re back in the same flat!
for now, he isn’t going to tell you that he appreciates your presence this much, but i can confirm that he’s down bad.
“you’re the only person whose mess isn’t a problem for me”
he might be a king on the football field, but we still need to work on love declarations.
@rindouheart ‘s headcanons — 02192023
#bllk#blue lock#bllk headcanons#bllk hc#barou shouei#blue lock shouei barou#chigiri hyoma#hyoma chigiri#.👺 anon!¡#shouei barou#bllk barou#bllk chigiri#bllk imagines#bllk scenarios#bllk x y/n#blue lock x reader#blue lock barou#blue lock chigiri#blue lock headcanons
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there not enough discourse around being ace and preferring not to talk about seggsual content even in clean situations. some of my friends (who are even a part of the aroace community) don’t understand this.
(sorry this is probably going to turn into a rant)
last week my aro friend and i were discussing sex and i used relatively clean or minimally detailed terms to talk about it because that’s just what i prefer but they straight up said something along the lines of “why are you acting like a 12 year old” (we’re both adults).
they know i’m ace. but that doesn’t seem to be reason enough for me to prefer not using explicit terms/language??
i feel like there’s a lot of talk about aces who may also have sex or aces who make sex jokes.
what about the aces who prefer to not think or talk about sex because it makes them uncomfortable?
tbh i think there should be more discourse around it.
why am i being compared to a child under the guise of “it’s normal to talk about sex as an adult”
i’m just mad that this kind of stuff is still going on today, even among people who claim to be educated on aroace identities.
🟣
I want to actually reply to this one, as an asexual who's friends thought they were so oblivious as to have never seen what a penis looked like. As in. Never even saw a picture. ALL of our friends are virgins, not a bad thing, and I was the one singled out. Because I was vocally uncomfortable talking about sex. So you know what I did? Complete 180, everything is a sex joke, everything is phallic. Because I was SO tired of being singled out. A lot of asexual people are adults, some who have had sex, a large amount who have consumed sexual content in some way (in movies, on TV, through fandom, through books) and even if we choose not to, we should NOT be treated as innocent children for it!!! We should not be CALLED children for it!!!! It's. Excuse my language, it's fucking disconcerting!! You have to have so much cognitive dissonance to speak to me the way I speak to the eight year olds in my classes.
It's so incredibly wild that an aromantic said that to you too, that's not okay. They of all people should have enough exposure to the ace community, and the aroace community, to understand why that is such a fucking stupid thing to say. Sorry. I'm so ANGRY about it!!!! I'm so angry about arospecs and acespecs being socially engineered to think like this too! I'm so angry about how people treat us, even the ones we love or respect! We are not kids! Not having sex doesn't make you a child! Not having a relationship doesn't make you a child! Neither of these traits should define your humanity or your adulthood and if they do that's a problem, even in allo people!!! Can the world stop being so fucking stupid about reproduction!!!! Holy shit!!!!!!
#sorry for the rant on your ask anon#you are just so right and so real.#thank you for ranting actually i love your rant you should do it more. we should all be allowed to not talk about sex#all the time. so sorry that happened to you#aask#asexual#asexuality#ace#mod aby
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Tw // Queer infighting, slur mention, suicide bait
I’m so sick and tired of how people treat trans guys. Just guys in general.
I have a classmate who, when I first met them, was still closeted so a gay “guy” (they’re nonbinary). I was out as transmasc, still nervous about it. They hadn’t known very many trans people, but they did really well about it. We chatted occasionally, they apologized and corrected whenever they misgendered me, they put effort into not calling me ‘girl’ bc it was a filler word for them like how I use dude, gushed over my top surgery. Early on it was a lot of “ohymgosh I’m soo sorry I don’t want to offend you!!” And me going “nbd, it takes a bit to get used to! Thanks for putting effort into it :)”
And then they came out as non-binary. I was really happy for them at first, but the way they act towards me (and honestly also everyone else) has just.... gotten so much worse since then. They call people - people they’ve been friends with!! Other trans people!! - transphobic for accidentally misgendering them even when the person immediately apologizes and corrects themselves. Like I totally get being sensitive about it, but when you’ve been out for less than a month.... there’s an adjustment period. It sucks, I know, but they’re not doing it on purpose. One time I disagreed with them, I don’t even remember what it was over, it didn’t even have anything to do with gender, and they got huffy and said “I’ll post on Twitter that you’re nonbinaryphobic!” Like???? My good person I am Also Non-binary. And they always pass these things off as jokes when people call them out but like. It’s really obvious that they’re not.
Even worse, they’ve completely fallen down the “kam” hole. They talk about how “all men are shit/need to die” just.... in front of everybody!! They’ll say it straight to the faces of the guys in the department, especially the ones they know won’t say shit back. They’ve been particularly targeting one of the freshmen (a cishet guy) they’re constantly saying shit about him being “stupid worthless man” and even called him a faggot???? Like Hello what the Actual Fuck do you think you’re doing????? They’ve said shit like that to him and one of my best friends, both cishet guys, both some of the most respectful people about me being trans that I’ve ever met. It makes me so furious that I start physically shaking.
And on top of all that, whenever I try to steer the conversation or defend the guys, they start talking shit to me too. It got to the point they looked me dead in the eye and said “all men should die, and you’re a shitty man too.” Which is especially fucked because I’m not!!! Even a man!!!! And they know that!!! But transmasc is close enough to tell me to die with the rest of the men, I guess. It was such a slap in the face that I couldn’t even respond, I stare. But they went on later, chatting and acting friendly as if they hadn’t told me straight to my face they think I should be dead.
We’re going on a school trip soon, and I got roomed with them, presumably because we’re the only two trans people going. Just thinking about it makes me so nauseous, I’ve already had a panic attack over being alone with them for that much time. But I don’t feel like I can intrude on asking to switch with anybody, because I’m trans and I could make them uncomfortable. and I just can’t make myself prioritize my comfort over others. Anybody else who rooms with them will get shit too, and as another trans person, I can defend myself against the bullshit they say better because it’s all amateur radfem-lite rhetoric. And I‘m probably the only other student who knows enough about queer theory and infighting to fire back. So i guess I’m just.... the sturdiest punching bag. After everything they said about being excited to talk to me about being trans!!! After all the effort I’ve put into being the first to come out in the department and help my professors and peers not be uncomfortable and tip-toe around me being trans!!!! I feel angry and betrayed and sad and scared and it’s so, so fucked up. I can tell they’re doing this because they’re scared and angry but it’s making things so much worse. And now I’m stuck playing both damage control and emotional meatshield. I hate this, but I can’t stand by and just watch either. I’m so tired.
Submitted July 13, 2023
#trans#transgender#trans masc#transmasc#trans masculine#transmasculine#trans man#trans boy#transgender man#transgender boy#trans guy#transgender guy#ftm#afab#transphobia#misgendering#enby#nb#nonbinary#non-binary#non binary#enban#misandry#transmisandry#homophobia#f slur#slur usage
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BESTIEEEEE 🩷 I AM SORRY I KNOW I'M SOOO LATE TO BOTH, I’m a terrible friend ik ik 😢 but I'm BACK and bestie I am literally the sameeee! I always check everyday…. to see when you’ve updated, been last active and just stalking your profile 😭😂
Commander Snow…. Chapter 6…. LET'S GET STARTED!!!
~
Look at our girl playing housewife to our Commander 😂 The poor girl's situation is literally Berlin Syndrome! I have to say I’m actually really surprised he didn’t wake her up and force her to eat dinner with him 😂
You know, I'm actually so shocked that he didn’t hit her over the whole Edmund situation. Usually his ‘anger’ and ‘frustration’ gets the better of him and he starts slapping the poor girl 😂
Omg them laying on the couch and him being the little spoon again and taking her arm around him and holding it under his chin…. he’s soooo baby 🥹🩷 And him feeling better that he was coming home to her 🥹 our poor baby is just looking to be safe and secured by her 😭
Coriolanus was stuck in District 12 dealing with half-wits and scum - 😑😑😑
I JUMPED when she got see what he looked like with curls 😫 and when she commented that he had curls 🥹 AND HUBBY IS GOING TO GROW THEM BACK ONCE HE’S BACK HOME 🥵 YES!
You would think Coryo and Dr. Gaul would’ve come up with a plan to poison President Ravenstill already 😂 I mean…. I know the poor old man is dying but still 😂
The way he just reaches out to her after his nightmare for comfort 😫and how he just panics when she’s not there but relaxes once he finds her on the couch 😫 the fear he has that she escaped his grasp…. poor baby is so traumatized from Lucy Gray 🥹 Again…. I am so surprised how he now contains his anger towards her when she tries to distance herself from him 😂 then again, he’s just too panicked and hazy from his nightmare!
WHEN HE SITS DOWN ON THE FLOOR BESIDE HER 😫 and when he gets up to lay next her…. And how he tries to hold her close to him…. and she’s so cute when she tries to wiggle away from his hold and falls down on the floor 😭 but WHEN he tries to bring her back down to his CHEST as she's trying to crawl over him 🫠 she wouldn't win that round if he wasn't so tired and out of it 😂
You would not comfort the man who kidnapped you. - She's so real for that 😂
“Was there something wrong with the bed?” he asks. - “You prefer the bed built by Edmund.” He spat his name like it was poison. - so so petty 🙄😂 he is so fucking crazy smart (obviously this is the future president of Panem and the most smartest and hyper focused person) to have figured out that Edmund built her bed just by knowing the wood matched! The idiot in me would have never figured that out 😂 - He feels settled as you sit by his feet. - MY GODDDD 😫
“Can you make me a cup of tea?” he asks. - yes, daddy. why is he so cute for asking her to make him a cup of tea 🥹 - He watches you while sitting on the couch. He liked how you moved so comfortably in the space. You were treating it like your home. No hesitation about where things were, you used things liberally. - AWEE WHEN I TELL YOU THIS PART MADE BLUSH SO MUCH 😫
“I had an enemy in the Capitol. He disliked my father and took it out on my family”. - “He sent you back as Commander?” - “No. He died. - bro forgot to mention the part where he killed him 🙄
“You’re safe. You’ve always been safe.” - Oh my sweet delusional boy…. 🤦♀️ And MY GOD he’s such a jealous man when it comes to Edmund 😈
THE WAY MY MOUTH HUNG OPENED WHEN HE SPLASHED HIS TEA ON THE COUCH AND HANDS IT TO HER SO SHE WOULD COME BACK TO BED 😳😂 - “Enjoy it then.” - 😑😑😑 MY GOD he is soooo prettyyy when she rejects him 😫 I LOVE IT 😈
~
When he pulls her up into the van and makes her sit on the floor between his legs 🥵😫 and taking her arms and placing them on his KNEES 😫 Everyone knows she’s the Commanders whore 😂😈 I love how he just helps her down the van too…. such a well respected gentleman to his followers (and me forgetting all the times he forced me to suck his dick 😂)
Okay. Before I get into this part…. I am literally gobsmacked he didn’t kill Edmund…. even with her convincing him how Edmund took care of her before he came along to take his place…. I still feel like that’s so out of character for him not to kill him just out of jealousy and being possessive over her 😳
“Please, Coriolanus. Let him go.” - “He threw the first punch.” - “He learnt his lesson.” you promise. - “Have you learnt yours?” - YOU, PETTY PETTY MAN 😫
“Gentlemen, welcome to District 12.” - why hello there, hottie 😈
The way she just begs him to stop by wrapping her arms around his neck to bring it back down to herself so he could only focus on her and her “affection” towards him 🥵😫 AND MY GOD when he kept PUSHING her on the “Do you love him” 😫
“Because if you loved him now would be the time to tell me, because I would hate to break apart lovers.” - MY GOD YOU’RE SO FUCKIN’ PETTY MY BOY 🥵 - “Do you love him?” You feel his fingers tighten on your face. - 🥵🥵 - “Do you love me?” - “More than him?” - I think i used up all my ‘petty’s’ when it comes to this man 😂 and yes, yes i do 😈 WHEN HE PULLED HIS BODY OVER HERS WHEN THE SHOT WHIZZED 😫🥵 Bro he was getting fed by the new recruits missing Edmund and took matters into his own hands…. HOT! Again I am so shocked he just let him go and didn’t kill him…. Poor Edmund man. He was literally a human bullseye in a game of Russian Roulette (i know it’s not actually Russian Roulette but it kinda reminded me of it lol 😂)
This whole part with Edmund was just more petty Coryo 😂 I love how Edmund tries to hold his head up high and show that he’s not scared of him! But man was this scene intense 😳
Awe this time he sits her down on his lap 🥹
“Edmund died today, as far as you are concerned.” - YES, SIR 🫡 MY GOD when he slams the paper and pen in front of her to write to her brother about them being a couple 😂 and making her write to Tigris and Grandma’am…. boy at least let the girl rest for a second after the little stunt you put her through with Edmund 😂
“My family are in the Capitol, yet they know about you.” - awee my sweet psycho killer baby boy 🥹 - “Now write to Tigris and my grandmother. Tigris suggested it would make you feel better, already knowing someone in the Capitol.” - I wonder what he told Tigris about his…. captive 👸 - You make yourself a promise that you would never meet his cousin or his grandmother. - yeah…. keep telling yourself that princess 🙄
I just love how in this story he’s trying to find out what happened to Lucy Gray, the fear of her being alive and out there and coming for him is literally eating him alive!!!
~
Okay. Edmund. Sweetie. ARE YOU OUT OF YOUR DAMN MIND? TRYING TO GET YOURSELF KILLED? AGAIN? YOU BARELY GOT OUT LAST TIME!! MY GOD BOY 😳😳😳 It’s reassuring to know her mom is okay and safe up in the mountains 🩷
“You can get the key and get out?” - “Yes.” - ohhhhh honeyyyy….. 🙄
~
HE CHAINED HER WRIST TO HIMSELF AS THEY SLEPT??? 🥵🫠 - making sleep impossible as he basically slept on top of you now. - GOD 😫 - Poor baby is so anxious and paranoid she’ll get away 🥹
“Do you not trust me?” - absolutely not, baby 🥹 - “You took me to a special place, and now I want to take you somewhere, okay?” - 😑😑😑 YEAH. For your own damn BENEFIT not HERS 👿
“Get in.” he barks. - yes, daddy 😈
Him just gripping her arm and throwing her in the back cage of the car after she wouldn’t get in because of the gun 😂 - “How are you doing back there?” - 😑😑😑 - “There’s a cabin I know of. There’s a lake too. I think you’ll like it.” - 😑😑😑 X6 - “Did Lucy Gray like it?” - ….she used to 😂 The poor girl is genuinely so TERRIFIED he’s going to kill her in the woods like he ‘did’ with Lucy Gray 🥹
The cabin in the woods….. talk about DEJA VU for everybody! The same woods, the same cabin, the rain, her running away from him, him chasing her down, yelling her name like the psycho he is 😈 not having control over the situation, the both of them not trusting each other and being paranoid and uneasy the ENTIRE time! The difference is that he managed to catch this one 😂 Okay let’s break this down!
Coriolanus seemed nervous to be there. His hand flexes as it reaches for you. - aweeeee 🥹😈 I just love love how he always retakes her hand for comfort…. And of course making sure she doesn’t get away 😂
Despite its appearance, someone had been here before you and Coriolanus. - literal chills…. 😳 I loved how eerie it was when they entered the cabin since we know what happened there before!
WAIT A DAMN MINUTE…. He kept her rainbow dress and BROUGHT IT with him here? 😳 and what exactly is he going to do with that dress of hers? 🤨 - The way he lets out a laughy breath sends shivers down your spine. - me too girl…. me too 😈 - “Whoever it belongs to is long gone.” - 😑😑😑 boy…. aweee she’s soooo scared of him rn 😭
“Are you okay?” - “Fine. You?” - “Perfect.” - I’m sorry but this interaction made me giggle so much like they both need to…. relax and chill with one another 😂
Okay there is sooooo much paranoia going on with these two right now…. Like seriously…. RELAX…. both of you…. NOW 😂 I can literally feel the fear from the both of them…. He is so terrified Lucy Gray is going to jump out and murder the both of them in cold blood and she is so sure that she’s dying tonight!
As Coriolanus finished his second trip with the bags, he used an old chair still there and pinned it under the door handle to prevent it from opening. - niceeee and cozyyyy and SECURE and SAFE 😂
“Will we?” you spat. “Why are we here anyway?” - girl, take a deep breath with me…. inhaleeee and exhaleeee 🥹 - “It’s quiet,’’ he suggests, “Some place quiet where we can be alone.” - BRO YOU ALWAYS ISOLATE HER WITH YOURSELF 😑😈
He is getting so fed up with her constantly bringing up Lucy Gray and accusing him for her disappearance! Usually this man would slap the shit out of her to stop her from saying Lucy Gray’s name 😳
“I didn’t know Lucy Gray. I’ve told you.” - Are you sure about that? 🤨
He opens a pack of sausages and throws them down without care before tossing the leftover garlic potatoes you cooked the night before in as well. - Okay this actually made me really really fucking hungry right now 😂
Our poor girl is 100% sure he’s going to kill and bury her in these woods 😭
“I have never hurt you.” - 😑😑😑 ….DELUSIONS. Or maybe we just have different definitions on what hurting someone is 😂 - “Have you starved under me? Has your mother?” he hits his chest with his next words, “You eat because of me. You sleep in a bed that I paid for. I provide for you. Me.” - yes you have starved her, yes to her mother 😑at least he wasn’t denying him hitting her 😂 and this man is acting like SHE’S the ONE who came to him asking for help 😑 Okay Coryo hitting his chest 🥵 - “Everything has happened to you because you strayed, and you want me to apologize for it?” - my god this man…. 😑 THE AUDACITY 🤦♀️ - “And I am not going to kill you. You don’t think you’ve done enough already to get yourself hanged? I protected you from that. Not Edmund.” - my jelly jealous boy 🥹
“Sit on the ground, by my boots.’’ - HOLY MOTHER OF GOD YES YES 🫠💦 sitting on the ground and wrapping her herself around his leg as he cooks MY GODDD 🥵😫 and when he FEEDS HER because he doesn’t trust her with a knife 🫠🥵 she hurt our poor baby's feelings with the pipe incident 🥹 WEARING HIS DOG TAG I CAN’T THIS IS TOO MUCH 😫 SOOO FUCKING HOT THAT HE ALSO HAS HER RING AROUND HIS NECK 🫠💦 she’s honestly so cute for that for asking for it tho 🥹 - “Happy now? Will you stop acting crazy?” - yes, daddy 😈
Teaching her cards and letting her win 🥹🩷
He and Edmund both wanted to take care of you but your heart only had place for one. And that spot rightfully, and wholly belonged to Coriolanus Snow. Edmund did his job of keeping you alive for Coriolanus and he was rewarded when the bullet went behind him and not into his skull. But now it was Coriolanus’s turn and both Edmund and you needed to learn that. - lucky lucky gal she is 🥹🥹and he’s so crazy i love it 😈
He liked the feeling of skin to skin with you but you beg him to keep his t-shirt on. You hated the feeling of his skin pressed against yours. He obliged. - WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU GIRL? And I'm surprised he listens to her sometimes 😂
The way she just ran when called her out and him JUMPING out to get her 😂 poor guy is reliving Lucy Gray all over again 🥹 OH BUT TO BE CHASED IN THE WOODS BY THIS MAN 😫😈
She was the victor of the hunger games, you were a lost lamb. You wouldn’t stand a chance against her. She would tear you to shreds if she thought she could get back at Coriolanus. - Does he really believe this is what Lucy Gray would actually do? 😳 my…. she really fucked him up, didn’t she 😂 AND did he forget HE’S the reason she won the Hunger Games in the first place? 🤦♀️
He thinks about returning to the cabin and retrieving his gun but you were already too far out of reach. - Okay but imagine he shot her too 😂
Boy is yelling and using the same lines he used on Lucy Gray the entire time 😂
His wild eyes scan the area for any sign of movement. The rain hindered his vision but he could hear the faint sound of branches snapping under your foot. - the psycho eyes and hyper focusness this man has is the hottest thing ever 😫 a wild animal hunting his prey 😈
“Do you honestly think you can run from me? That I won’t find you?” - come on…. we’re just playing hide n seek here 😈 and yes, you will always find me because I'm just an innocent doe 😫 Ughhhh him yelling her name and just screaming out of frustration just does things to me 🫠 - “Y/N! Come out now! This isn’t funny!” - it’s kinda funny when you can’t find meeee 🤭
“You stupid, little girl” - “When I catch you…” - call me a stupid, little girl, again 😫😈 And what are you gonna do to me when you catch me? 🤭 SO HOT! And of course he taunted and threatened her with her mothers life 😂 too bad he can’t find her since she’s up in the mountains 🫢 - “Y/N. That’s enough.” - “Y/N, I said that’s enough!” - Oh come on just five more minutes 😫😈
“You’re going to get lost in the forest. There’s worse things than me out there.” - oh no baby…. It’s just you 😈
The paranoia he has with Lucy Gray…. that she is some wild and savage animal out to kill his girl is hysterical to me 😂 but at the same time…. I kinda understand him and the fear!
He needed to find you. To make sure you were alright. That Lucy Gray hadn’t got her hands on the only pure thing in his life. - 😑😑😑 ….well he clearly got over his first ‘love’ quick like DAMN! poor girl 😭 i tell ya, he is the king of the Lucy Gray slander 😂
My man is so smart for throwing that tree branch to get her out of hiding 😫 I LOVE A GOOD CHOOSE SCENE WHERE HE IS OBVIOUSLY FASTER AND CATCHES HER BY THE WAIST AND PULLING HER DOWN AND STRADDLING HER AND PINNING HER DOWN ON THE FLOOR 😈
In all honestly tho the girl is lucky he didn't beat the living shit out of her 😳
“Shut up,” he grabs your jaw and stills it in his direction, “You stupid, stubborn, fool of a girl. - MY GOD 🥵🥵🥵
“It was foolish. What if something got you in the forest?’’ - BRO YOU GOT ME 🤦♀️ I WAS TRYING TO RUN FROM YOU 😑 - “Do you have any idea what that would have done to me?” - aweeee…. you fucking psycho 🥹🩷
Don’t you just love it when your captor drags you back by your arm and pushes you back to the cabin and lectures you about how he’s the reason behind something you never wanted or asked for 🩷🥹 Also girly never tell Coriolanus Snow you don’t care about him! The man has some serious mommy issues….
“When you were hungry, I cared.” - “When you didn’t have money for rent, I cared.” - “Clothes for the winter, medicine for your mother. I cared. And what do I get for it?” - “All I ever wanted from you was for you to care.” - “You would think after everything, I would be entitled to it.” - BOY SHE NEVER WANTED OR ASKED FOR ANY OF THAT! AND THE DESPERATION ABOUT HER MOMS MEDICINE WAS YOUR OWN DOING, BOY 😑😑😑 But…. HOT HOT HOT 🥵 Our delusional baby just wanted her to care for him and validate him 🥹🩷
Damn he just lifted her up and threw her across the floor like a sack of potatoes 😂 and trapping her by cuffing her wrists to the oven 🥵🥵 - “Look at you,” he spat, “You wouldn’t have lasted the night out there.” - not without you, daddy 😈 I love how he just sits on her legs 😂 like the poor girls body is weak and she’s already cuffed 😂 - He speaks slowly and dangerously with your face in his hands. - FOCUS GIRL FOCUS 😳 - “If you ever try to leave me again, there will be nothing you could do that would save Edmund”. - Do you understand?” - you're going to have to kill me if you asked to leave you 😂 - You nod, but it seemed to anger him. - “I asked if you understood,” he yells. - YES YES YES! KEEP YELLING AT ME BECAUSE I AM A STUPID GIRL 😫
“I doubt you’ve ever thought something useful in your life. Use to everybody else doing it for you.” - you are correct, daddy 😫 - His hands tangle in your hair forcing you to keep still. - 🥵😈🥵😈
“I’ll do your thinking for you from now on. Your next independent thought, I’ll smash from your skull, understand?” - i just fucking came 🫠💦 I JUST FUCKING CAME!
The rain soaked him again and his shirt clung uncomfortably on his skin. - DAMN 🥵🥵 - It sticks the cold to his chest and his mind floats back to you inside. You were sure to catch a cold if he didn’t move fast. - he’s crazy. but he cares for her so much in his own sick and twisted way 🥹🩷
I want to give her the biggest hug right now 🩷 poor girl was just shivering on the kitchen floor 😢 and him wiping off the water from his face with his soaked shirt had me going MEOW 🐱 And damn he actually wanted to go swim in the lake with his new lover -> where it once belonged to him and his old lover 😂
My man is petty af by not letting her wear her the extra clothes and just dressed her one of his shirts 😂
So hot when she’s battling with him over who takes off her clothes 😫 - “I do the thinking for you, remember.” - yes, daddy 😈 ughhhh i can’t function properly rn with the way he carelessly yanks it off her 😫 - He keeps his eyes as forward as he can as he slides the sleeves up your arms. Only looking down as he does up the buttons. It was oddly gentlemanly and you wonder if he did it for his sake or yours. - yea…. i’m honestly shocked too by his ‘gentlemanliness’ 😂 When she begs him to stop but he doesn’t when he’s trying to get her out of her underwear and puts new ones on her 😫 At least he had the decency to give the girl a pillow and lay a blanket onto her 😂 BUT he can’t sleep so he goes to sleep next to her 😫 he literally can’t sleep without her anymore 😂
~
“Hungry?” he asks. - you petty son of bitch 😂 poor girl is so hungry and he’s just gonna torture her while he’s eating in front of her and not give her any 😈 - “Imagine how hungry you would be lost in the woods.” - 😑😑😑 - “You would be dead if I didn’t find you.” - how is he so sure? 😂 this man's ego and need for control 🙄😈 - “What do you have to do?” - “None of your business.” he snaps. - DAMN BABY 🥵
I love the Lucy Gray storyline! I love how scared he is of her! It’s actually really really frightening too because it’s like she’s haunting these woods and would violently jump out and murder anyone who enters it in cold blood, including him. I just love how he’s searching the forest for her and retracing his steps back to the snake bite sight and aiming his gun to where he ‘shot’ her like she’s just gonna jump out and rip him to shreds! I swear the mystery of what happened to this girl is EATING me alive 😂 no clues, signs, no nothing left of her in these woods! And of course he would kill all the mockingjays 😂 and the consideration this psycho has of the gunshot scaring his girl 🥹🩷
I actually have a theory about this whole Lucy Gray thing…. I think Lucy Gray did survive and ran from the forest right away and had gone North like she planned to. Now, what if…. Lucy Gray is living up in the mountains, and is in contact, or even lives, with Edmund and her mother…. DUN DUN DUN 😳
He presses the point of the gun into your ankle, pinning it against the floor. You don’t try moving under threat. He slides the gun slowly up your leg, over your calf, over your knee, inching up to the middle of your thigh under his shirt. - “Open your legs wider.” he demands. - OH GOD PLEASE HELP ME I NEED HIM TO WRECK MY VAGINA 🫠💦 - “I am in a very good mood. You would hate to ruin that wouldn’t you?” - what are you gonna do if I don’t comply? 😈 OMFG HE NESTLES HIMSELF BETWEEN HER LEGS LAYS HIS BODY DOWN ON HERS I CAN’T RN 😫
“I have been nothing but patient and kind to you.” - THIS ONE SURE IS A LAUGH ISN’T IT 😂
But really what you promised is that you would allow yourself one more chance of escape before he made good on his promise to kill your mother and Edmund. - Yeah…. good luck with that hun 😂
~
I WENT A LITTLE CRAZY WITH THIS ONE 😂
BESTIEEEE I AM MENTALLY PREPARING MYSELF FOR CHAPTER 7!!!! AHHHH I’M SO EXCITED 🩷
HEY bestie!
thank you for this 💕💕
The validation from posts like these makes me feel dizzy! I love hearing how my work has been interpreted it honestly helps my writing skills so much!
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He is getting so much better with the hitting! In the original draft when he catches the reader in the forest he is a little heavy handed but i thought it didn't fit the characters state. He was suppose to be almost frozen with fear in the same way he was when he had the nightmare. like he felt reduced to a little boy rather then the strong man he is.
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I mean who is to say Dr Gaul isn't poisoning President Ravenstill 👀
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i've had a lot of comments saying that it was out of character for Coriolanus not to kill Edmund! and i totally respect that.
But, in my reading of Coriolanus, he is lead by his mind rather then emotion. Edmund is a huge bargaining chip. I don't see him throwing it away because he is jealous.
Also, I love Edmund and need him for plot progression so Coriolanus can't kill him, haha.
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Now for the main piece of the chapter; the cabin in the woods.
I am so glad you saw that the scene was identical to him and Lucy-grey. Yes! he was reliving it! but as a different man.
I was tempted to have him go get the gun and shoot but i decided against it. Because the situation was different. He saw lucy-grey as a threat to his freedom, while he saw the reader as something he had to protect, not something he ever had to fear.
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Now the bag with Lucy-grey's dress was already there from when Coriolanus and her ran way.
They brought a bag of stuff for their travels. While it was never explicitly stated that Lucy-Grey brought her mothers dress, I don't think she would have left without it (Despite the memories it now carried). I also needed an item Coriolanus could pull from the bag to show that it was Lucy-grey's bag from the day to show that she hadn't been back to the cabin. Which would have given Coriolanus security that he managed to kill her on that day, Hence the laugh.
he then took the bags from the cabin and drowned them in the lake so all the evidence from that day was buried.
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Chapter 7 will be out soon! please let me know what you think!!!!
#coriolanus snow#dark!coriolanus snow#the ballad of songbirds and snakes#coriolanus x reader#dead dove do not eat#commander snow
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Okay okay I’m currently rereading fortuna primaginia for like the seventh or eighth time rn and I am genuinely very curious (and you by no means have to answer this if you don’t want to) but how would the story have differed if Ratchet had shot his shot first and reader had ended up with him before Optimus? My mind is just rolling at the parallels of what could be similar but what would be so very different. Would Optimus have even attempted engaging the reader after that? I love them so much!!!
(Anon sorry I'm sure you just wanted a simple little aside but you're getting a full blown greentext headcanon sloppy style fanfic)
Slaps ask This bad boy can fit SO MUCH angst in it good fucking god. This has been literally eating at my brain every waking second since I received it. There’s just so, so many ways this could go down. And since there IS so many ways this could go down, please by no means treat this shit my brain coughed out as the only way. It’s just a way. But it got my in a vice grip and won’t let go.
Also if anyone’s got their own ideas about how this could’ve gone down please, please share
-Around the time you guys had your first little late night/early movie pow wow, Ratchet, in a wired/half asleep delirium, makes a pass.
-It’s a throwaway pass, probably relevant to something in the movie. He doesn’t expect you to even respond.
-He definitely doesn’t expect you to reciprocate.
-He knows he should stop right exactly here and never bring it up again
-But he doesn’t.
-He’s old. He’s tired. He’s (at least a little) drunk. He’s been fighting for so long and passed up so many chances at happiness. Fuck it. He’s gonna see where this goes.
-He starts making excuses to see you more often, and you do the same with him.
-OP notices this and immediately backs off, full stop.
-You figure he wasn’t actually that into you to begin with, and (albeit reluctantly) shrug it off, and are thus freed to peruse Ratchet with no remorse.
-In reality, it’s a knee-jerk reaction out of respect to Ratchet, since he’d done the same for him when they were dating, and he’d first started talking to Elita. Ratchet already sacrificed his happiness for him once before. he’s not going to let him do it again.
-But that doesn’t stop his feelings from doing…whatever it is they’re doing.
-You still saved Bumblebee. You still adopted Bumblebee, so this mech can’t not see you.
-Every time he takes you to the park, or the movies, or on a nature walk somewhere, and sees you playing with his sparkling he wants to shove his head into an industrial trash compressor
-He’s happy for you. He’s happy for Ratchet. He’s forever indebted to you for saving Bumblebee and Primus-fragging-blessed why isn’t that enough?
-That and he’s still actively mourning the loss of Elita, whom you share an almost identical EM signature with, so every time he’s within sensing range of you he’s blasted with grief and guilt.
-But he still spends time with you. It hurts just to look at you, but if the alternative is not seeing you at all then he’ll gladly endure the pain.
-When the heat cycle hits, you’re actually with Optimus. He, you and Bumblebee were in one of the training rooms getting some (gentle, for Bee’s sake) exercise.
-When that electrical, wet, cracked egg sensation first drips down your spine, Optimus stops what he’s doing, stares at you, and starts trembling.
-You’re understandably worried and ask him what’s wrong.
-He manages to articulate something about you emitting an abnormal EM frequency, and to please to go see Ratchet about it immediately.
-You have more questions, but he excuses himself from the conversation to walk a safe distance away from you Bee, and proceeds to tear a fucking wall out
-You go to the infirmary to see Ratchet, who explains heat cycles and why he thinks your mutant little human body is mimicking one while crushing the edge of a medical berth with his servos.
-You, already pretty riled up from watching two (2) of your handsome robot buddies crush and smash things on your behalf, tell him to go ahead and break the Hynek’s scale with you
-Ratchet,having zero reason to restrain himself otherwise, mass converts, bends you over a human-sized medical gurney, and fucks you until you black out.
-You don’t go into a coma. Ratchet’s exceptionally skilled in maneuvering his field, so freeing it from your grabby, inexperienced one isn’t a problem for him.
-Nor do you wind up with a busted pelvis, bruises or bleeding after sex(at least, not by much. His dick’s still the size of two tallboy monster cans duct-taped together.)
-But after the third or so time you guys bone, you do start coughing a lot. And passing out a lot. And puking a lot.
-Ratchet’s starting to worry he missed something in his evaluation of your body’s adaption to energeon and cybertronian bio fluids. So he runs some scans.
-Lolnope. Turns out you adapted too well. You’re fucking pregnant.
-He stares at the results for a whole-ass hour before he can even summon the courage to explain this to you.
-By “explain” he means “I had no idea this was possible and I still don’t know how it’s possible or what the fuck it’s going to do to your tiny little squishy body if you decide to keep it.”
-You, knowing full well how devastatingly close their whole species is to extinction, thinking about Bumblebee growing up without ever seeing another sparkling, decide “fuck it. We doing spacemom 2 : electric boogaloo”
-Ratchet’s whole ass world changes right exactly then.
-In a bad way.
-He’s going to be supportive. He’s going to take care of you. He’s going to monitor you night and day and give you everything you could possibly ever need, because not only is this entirely his fault and he cares about you, but-
-He doesn’t want to be around sparklings.
-Bumblebee is different. Bumblebee doesn’t exist because of him
-But because of what happened with Soundwave, and the cassettes, he does not want to have a sparkling. He’s not allowed to. Not after what he did.
-He starts drinking more. And loosing himself in his work. And finding reasons to not be around you.
-Or anyone.
-He’s in his lab constantly. He says it’s because he’s learning as much as he possibly can about human bodies and human reproduction and running what tests he can to find out how to give you the nutrients the sparkling needs without poisoning you, how to compensate for the effects of your weaker field on it’s organ and internal systems development.
-He’s not lying. But he’s also using it as an excuse to stay the hell away from you.
-Your relationship starts deteriorating, along with your health.
-Seeing you getting sicker and weaker because of something he did to you is dredging all his baggage with the Iaconian hospital experiments up from the dark corners of his mind and you are in no condition for him to confess about that now.
-So he hides. You’re left out in the cold.
-Optimus see’s you emotionally freezing to death, and offers warmth.
-The time you’d normally reserved for spending with Ratchet is now spent with him.
-You don’t want to dump your problems on him. You don’t.
-But Optimus feels the sting of Ratchet’s cold shoulder just as badly as you do. So he winds up being less an emotional dumping ground and more of a commiserating partner.
-You’re both so worried about him.
-Op’s so worried about you, being balls deep in your carrying cycle, puking blood almost daily and in a terrible place with your baby daddy.
-He tells himself it doesn’t go deeper than that. And it never will
-He knows it’s bullshit.
-He knows his spark screaming out for him to comfort you and screaming out for him to take you are two vines in the same jungle, hopelessly braided together and impossible to separate fully.
-He knows this and he still invites you out to stargaze after Bee’s been put to sleep, wrapping you up in so many sweaters and blankets and bringing you to the top of the base for the clearest view of the desert sky.
-He’ll lie down on his back and you’ll sit next to his helm and nerd out until you inevitably fall asleep mid-sentence somewhere.
-He’s heard you name every single star in every single visible constellation a hundred times, and he’ll gladly hear it a hundred more.
-He offhandedly compares you to Ursa while you’re pointing it out, and you break down in tears.
-You’re not a bear. You’ve never been a bear. Bears are strong enough to keep their shit together. You’re not keeping your shit together. At all.
-He tells you that’s bullshit. He tells you anyone in your position would be breaking down, yes including a bear.
-He tells you you’re the strongest person he’s ever met and whatever’s going on with Ratchet’s not your fault. It’s not.
-He has a point, but you still feel so weak, and tell him you can see why Ratchet wouldn’t want to be with someone as fragile as you.
-Seeing you like this breaks something in him. There’s protocols blowing up left and right in his processor and spark telling him to stop the tiny human from crying. Stop the adoptive mother of his sparkling from crying. Stop you from crying.
-So he rolls over, he cradles you against his cheek while you sob. You lean into him, throw your tiny arms around him and -
-He kisses you
-He realizes it’s a mistake the second he does it. He breaks the kiss, wracked with guilt, apologies immediately, tires to pull away-
-You don’t let him. You kiss him back.
-His field rolls over you out of nowhere like a tsunami, knocking you on your ass.
-He can feel your field already sinking it’s inexperienced kitten claws into his, and he yanks it away before they can entwine further.
-You two stare at each other in silence for a few moments after that, before wordlessly heading back inside.
-You go straight to bed, too tired to analyze exactly what the fuck that was, or wonder if you were wrong about him not liking you.
-He goes back to his room and stares at the wall. He has no excuse for what the fuck he just did. He doesn’t even drink. He made that mistake stone cold sober.
-Both you and Ratchet need his support right now, not whatever shit he just pulled.
-He’s a leader and a father. He can’t ever afford to make a mistake like that again.
-But he can’t leave you alone, because he knows Ratchet won’t be here for you.
-And he can’t leave Ratchet alone, because he won’t let anyone else near him.
-He stares at the wall for the rest of the night.
-The next day, the sparkling sends out it’s first ping, seeking to start it’s nonverbal, psychic bond with it’s sire
-Except, it doesn’t send it to it’s sire.
-Ratchet’s field had been clamped so tightly around his frame ever since this started you haven’t been able to feel it at all. Naturally, the sparkling had nothing to cling to either.
-Instead, it forms a bond with the mech who’s field dragged you in like a riptide
-It forms one with Optimus
-Neither of you bring this up to Ratchet. You can’t. You both already feel guilty as hell for whatever the fuck that was.
-But neither of you can deny the gravitational pull you feel towards each other anymore.
-The sparkling starts sending him clips of your voice. Of His voice.
-Optimus feels his spark splitting in two both because this tiny little ethereal voice is calling out to him, not Ratchet, and because he can’t answer that tiny voice.
-You make tentative plans to put your head through a fucking cheese grater the second this metal baby is out of you.
-Fortunately, that comes sooner than later.
-Unfortunately, much like with Bee, the sparkling’s field gets lodged in your brainwaves during emergence, and can’t fully separate
-They do finally become untangled once she’s born
-But that’s only after your neural activity slows to a crawl when you blackout
-NOW it’s coma time, baby.
-Seeing you comotose after giving birth to his sparkling is the last straw for Ratchet
-He snaps
-Hands the sparkling to Optimus, apologizes, and just leaves.
-Optimus is left largely alone and flailing with this sparkling, who is basically recognizing him as her dad.
-She repeatedly sends him clips of your voice, her way of asking “Where’s mom? I want mom? I waited so long to see them where’s mom?”
-The first thing she blurts out with her primitive vox are the beginning notes to David Bowie’s Diamond Dogs.
-Echo seems like a fitting name. He relays this experience and the suggestion to Ratchet.
-Ratchet’s optics glaze over. His lip trembles. He unintentionally crushes the cube of hi-grade he’s holding, but agrees.
-But beyond that, Ratchet is gone.
-Wakes up, attends to any medical issues for the team, then drinks himself to unconsciousness, rinse and repeat.
-He is a miserable, drunk old bastard barely fit for duty let alone to be a father
-Thank god for Fowler, who’s kept people like Astoria, Carly and Raoul on call for exactly this outcome(He predicted robot fucking would have repercussions, and he was RIGHT)
-Astoria takes one look at your comatose body and gets her tubes tied immediately.
-They wind up having to take babysitting off base most of the time, though, because Ratchet refuses to be around any humans
-Which is why when Jack, Miko and Raf wind up there eventually, he’s less than enthused.
-They should leave. They NEED to leave, because he’s only ever hurt things smaller than himself.
-Despite this, Raf and Bumblebee manage to still get through to him somehow.
-His relationship with Echo, though.
-It’s bad.
-He can’t even look at her without seeing your face. And Soundwave’s face. And every single cassette he forced into existence.
-Optimus visits you while you slumber.
-It’s not often that he can do this, pressure of being a leader. And a father. And now the lone diplomatic relation between cybertronians and humanity, after you decided to take a preemptive dirt nap.
-Sometimes he tells you mundane things, like how his day went, how everyone’s doing
-He likes to tell you how Bee and Echo are doing. That they’ve gotten along exceedingly well. Their so close in age, that’s to be expected.
-But Bee adores her, and she’s aggressively possessive of him
-And, when he’s run out of things to say, he’ll thank you. He’ll thank you for saving Bumblebee. For fighting so hard to establish refuge for his people here. For keeping him company. For being his friend.
-For letting him love you.
-He always chokes up on the last one, and leaves before he can finish, excusing himself from a quiet room and leaving as silently as he came.
-Ratchet visits you too.
-A lot
-In fact, when he’s not in the infirmary, or his quarters, or drinking in either of those places, he’s here.
-But unlike Optimus, he comes up empty for words.
-He just watches your unmoving body, and the gentle oscillations of the various monitors hooked up to you
-He will say one thing, though, every time. Right before he leaves
-It’s always the same thing.
-”I’m sorry.”
-While this is going on, you’re busy cavorting around with Elita in the realm of the primes with Rumble and Frenzy
-She (lovingly) berates you for not sleeping with her husband, which is a trip in of itself.
-In between trials she teaches you how to hop in and out of dreams
-Even the nightmarish, extremely unstable ones
-So naturally, you dive right into one of Ratchet’s dreams
-You’re flooded with every single last thing haunting his mind.
-All of it. His history with the medical research. Everything he’s done.
-It’s so horrific you can hardly stay for longer than a heartbeat, but-
-You fight through the darkness to get to him, unrelenting until you grab his servo
-And when you do so, you get to see him. Actual him. The him buried beneath the toxic walls he’s built up.
-And that him bleeds nothing but the purest, unconditional love for you. For your sparkling. For Optimus and Bee.
-He’s still there. The mech you fell in love with is still there.
-He’s just drowning in his own regret and misery with no way out
-His anguish is an uncharted mountain and he needs a guide
-You’re going to have to be that guide
-So with some intense astral fuckery, you drag him him out of his own dream, and Elita drags the both of you into Optimus’s dream.
-Optimus’s dream is more stable.
-Thank god it can withstand the emotional shitshow that is the four of you being in the same place
-There’s enough angst and self-blame to flood god’s basement
-Elita, being dead and all, has even less tolerance for this bullshit then the three living of you combined
-She grabs you with one arm and kisses you, and uses the other arm to push Ratchet into Optimus’s lap.
-It devolves into a fourway pretty fast
-You’re the luckiest human in the fucking universe
-Afterwards, Optimus laments how guilty he feels for wanting this. For enjoying this. How bad he feels about wanting you. How much he still wants Ratchet.
-He feels like a selfish asshole for pining after you both. You two should be happy together. Why can’t he just be happy for you two while silently drowning in his grief for Elita
-Both you, Ratchet and Elita tell him that’s bullshit.
-Both you, Ratchet and Elita tell him all of them deserve to be happy.
-Elita tells all of you in no uncertain terms if you three don’t find a way to be a thruple IRL she’ll put each and every one of you in a sex coma IRL so help her Primus.
-You wake up.
-It’s been 30. Fucking. years.
-The first thing you see upon waking up is the last thing you saw before blacking out
-Your little girl
-She’s taller than a two story townhouse and her optics are the same color as your eyes.
-”Welcome back, Mom.”
-You can’t even begin to comprehend what you’re seeing
-You don’t have time. The next person in the room is Bee, who’s even taller.
-He knees down, trembling, warbling, tears in his optics.
-”Did you have a nice nap?”
-Reader.exe has stopped working
-The next person in
-Oh
-Oh.
-It’s Ratchet
-Bee and Echo clear out before you can scream at them not to leave, leaving you alone with your estranged boyfriend
-He walks over to you slowly, mouth set in a firm, flat line.
-He kneels down beside you, places his hand on the side of the berth
-And starts openly weeping.
-He’s sorry. He’s sorry for putting you in danger. He’s sorry for knocking you up. he’s sorry for icing you out. He’s sorry for fucking everything and tells you if you had even a shred of self-preservation instinct left in you you’d leave him and never look back and he’d never blame you and-
-And you tell him to shut the fuck up.
-You kiss him. He smells like highgrade and millennia of repressed guilt and you can’t get enough of it because it’s fucking Ratchet.
-You tell him about the coma. You tell him about all the dreams. You prove it to him by relaying everything about the cassettes.
-His face pales further. You decide to (temporarily) withhold information about the dream orgy
-You reassure him that where you were and how you got there, you could see shit. You could see the driving force and divine interplay of how bad decisions and poor judgment come to tangle hopelessly together and prompt action like puppeteers through the strings of the livings and you’re absolutely not done which this, but
-You still love him. Nothing is ever going to change that.
-Dude looks like he was fucking reborn. There’s something so young in those teal searchlights that make you feel like a child again.
-For a moment, everything is okay.
-He spends the rest of the night with you, never once leaving your side.
-You don’t get a happily ever after yet, though.
-You still have two grown-ass children you need to catch up with
-One of which doesn’t know you at all.
-She’s extremely eager to start a relationship with you though because she’s been looking forward to this her entire life
-She might be an adult, but the way she turns her optics on you and listens with rapt attention when literally anything comes out of your mouth makes you feel like you actually got your baby back
-She’s utterly fascinated by you and worships the ground you walk on, treating you like some sort of beloved idol or storybook character come to life
-It’s cute for now and probably not the healthiest reaction but that is by no means your biggest concern, because
-Echo and Ratchet’s relationship is terrible
-You can’t even call it a relationship
-She’s got daddy issues out the aft
-Blames him for everything that happened to you, which he happily reinforced with his self-depreciating lifestyle
-Bee also low-key blames Ratchet for taking his mom away. He understand it’s not his fault, it was an accident, but you were gone for 30 years.
-Echo is absurdly attached to the gaggle of humans that raised them, even more so than Bee.
-She’s even more attached to Optimus, follows him around like a lost puppy and craves his approval
-Which isn’t that hard to earn because he adores her.
-He struggles with her grudge against her biological sire, though. Because no matter what he’s never found it in himself to blame Ratchet, and has tried, to little avail, to turn her towards him.
-She’s shown considerable proficiency in medicine, but refuses to study it seriously because it’s what “that guy” does and FUCK “That guy”.
-You know it’s not entirely your responsibility to fix her and Bee’s opinion of Ratchet
-But it’s an enormous fucking mess and the burden’s going to be way easier if shared
-You go to Optimus for help
-Because, aside from the humans, he’s the one who basically raised these two.
-Alone
-That cannot have possibly been easy
-That cannot have possibly left him without some damage
-He’s been kind, but distant ever since you awakened
-Seems to be reluctant to speak to you alone
-But once you have him alone, he breaks down
-Sweeps you up in his hands
-begs you to just let him hold you
-He missed you. He missed you so fucking bad
-He never told Ratchet about the time you two merged. Or the bond he formed with Echo because of it
-Or the kiss
-The guilt that comes over his face when bringing this up breaks your heart
-You can’t take it anymore
-You go to Ratchet
-You tell him about the dream in blinding detail
-He looks like he’s watching a slow motion train crash when you bring it up, but he remembers every last vivid bit as though it were yesterday
-Admits it was the happiest he’d ever been and waking up felt like getting kicked out of heaven
-Admits he never actually wanted to break up with Optimus
-Admits those feelings resurfaced when you were sick and Optimus was the only one he’d let anywhere near him
-Admits that made him feel even worse because you were fucking dying
-Probes you for your feelings for Optimus
-This time you break
-Fall to your knees and start fucking sobbing
-You’ve loved this mech ever since you first laid eyes on him
-Ever since fate determined you’d bring that tiny yellow sparkling from the brink of death
-Being apart from him makes you feel like a plant without water. You’re shriveling up and drying out.
-You need him. You don’t want to be apart anymore.
-You tell Ratchet about the merge. The bond. The kiss.
-Ratchet looks about as relived as he does devastated
-Relived, because you want Optimus as badly as he still does
-Devastated because he made himself physically unavailable for Echo to form that bond
-He knows forming that bond with Optimus was probably the best thing that could have possibly happened to her at the time
-But he also knows it happened because he fucked up and continued to fuck up for thirty whole ass years and his daughter wants nothing to do with him and it’s completely his fault
-You tell him as kindly as possible, that yeah, he’s right, but also to shut the fuck up.
-If she knew what he’d been through, she’d understand.
-It’s gonna take a long time and a whole lot of work, but it’s not too late to fix this.
-It’s also not too late to fix things with Optimus, and that probably won’t take as much work
-Since that’s the easier of the two tasks by far, that’s the one you guys start with
-Both you and Ratchet corner him in the infirmary after he comes back from a mission a little banged up
-Tell him in plain fucking english you both remember the dream, both want him romantically and carnally, both willing to move mountains to make this work, and if you don’t want Elita to make good on her threat you’d better sort this shit out now
-Optimus doesn’t need any further convincing
-Fucks you both till you see Primus and pass out.
-Now that you’ve made headway on sorting your relationship shit out,
-It’s time to start sorting the parenting shit out
-With the three of you working together, it’s a lot less overwhelming
-Bee, emotionally mature as he is, winds up working through his grievances with Ratchet pretty easily
-He never wanted to hold a grudge against him to begin with, and was pretty eager to drop it when given sufficient reason
-That, and the fact that his dad, (who he’d been goading to confess to for years) has finally hooked up with his mom makes him pretty happy.
-Echo is far less easy to appease
-For a while, it actually gets worse, since she’s jealous of the time you and Optimus spend with Ratchet
-But because of the time you’re spending together, it makes it harder for her to avoid him
-She asks you one day “what the frag you could possibly see in him” while she’s simultaneously re-calibrating the ground bridge resonance controls and running an experimental distillation on synthetic red energon
-Staring stupidly with your mouth open at the similarities, you tell her
-”Right now, I see you. Goddamn you’re just like him.”
-She snaps her wrench in half, growls and kicks the shards across the room.
-“Like him? I can’t fraggin’ stand him!”
-You sigh. “He can’t stand himself either.”
-She makes a face like she knows you have a point but isn’t willing to admit it even to herself, and that’s the exact same face Ratchet made when you told him you wanted to keep her.
-She finally approaches Ratchet the next day
-Just walks up to him while he’s in the lab, drags a stool over and sits down
-”So apparently we both hate ourselves”
-Ratchet stops what he’s doing.
-“What could you possibly hate yourself for?”
-”Besides the obvious?”
“-What obvious-?”
“I’m the reason mom was in a coma.”
-Ratchet drops his wrench. And his jaw
-Tries to tell her that’s bullshit.
-She won’t let him get a word in edgewise
-”And I know you hate yourself for that too.”
-He doesn’t even try to deny that one
-”Hating you for the same reason I hate myself makes it easier to hate myself. And I…don’t want to hate myself anymore.”
-Ratchet.exe has stopped working
-She tells him she has absolutely not forgiven him for being practically non-existent in her life, and she’s not sure if she ever will but-
-Maybe she doesn’t have to, to move on.
-Maybe they can acknowledge this as a massive-ass problem that will keep coming back and never fully be resolved
-And maybe they can move forward despite it
-And despite both of them trying exceedingly hard not to be, they’ve wound up extremely similar, so
-Maybe learning not to hate themselves will be easier if they do it together.
-She tells him in spite of everything she still wants to like him. So bad.
-Ratchet finally stops, and turns to look at her.
-She’s gritting her denta, digging her digits into the side of the seat so hard it cracks, and holding back tears.
-He tells her, after several tries to get his mouth working again, that he wants to give her a reason to like him.
-”Yeah well-” she shakily pries her servos off the seat, jumps down, picks up his wrench and hands it back to him. “I guess we have the rest of our lives to figure that out.”
-Her hands brush his as she hands the wrench back, and for the first time, she doesn’t recoil or jerk them away.
-She leaves
-He stands there for a whole thirty seconds after she leaves staring at the wrench before setting it down on the desk
-Then putting his helm down on the desk
-And starts crying harder in relief then he’s ever cried in his life
#Fp#optimus x reader#Optimusxyou#Ratchet/reader#Ratchet/you#optimus/reader#optimus/you#ratchetxreader#ratchetxyou#transformers#tf fandom#sparklings#what the fuck have I done oh god sorry
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I can't help but feel like all of this defense of Bianca is purely due to ableism that F1 fans themselves have but don't realize.
The amount of times I've seen people try to pull the "I can't be racist because I have black/brown friends/relatives" card and still have to face consequences, yet she uses her autistic brother as a prop to claim she can't be ableist and people are suddenly like "omg best apology ever, we support our queen."
No. I am autistic. I've gotten bullied for it for much of my life. I don't appreciate seeing Bianca continuing that bullying by encouraging the use of autism as an insult, and I especially don't like her using someone who is autistic to try to cover up her behavior. People need accountability if they're going to learn, and so far her version of "taking accountability" has just been "I'm just a girl, just a kid, only 18, I didn't know better" which luckily she deleted, and then using her autistic brother to try to gain PR brownie points after insulting people with autism.
And I KNOW F1 is full of ableism, not just on twitter but on here too. Hell, I was ranting to a F1 friend maybe a month ago about a post someone made on here about how they didn't like Lando solely because they thought he was neurodivergent but he was too privileged to have to mask his neurodivergent behavior and I just? Girl what in the fucking ableism. Do people realize how exhausting "masking neurodivergent behavior" is? And that post had about a dozen notes - not of people calling it out, but of people agreeing with it. Lance gets the majority of it, but I've also seen people use autism to insult Logan too. He isn't in F1 anymore, but I saw it all the time with Latifi too. Like fucking stop chalking up disliking people to "omg i don't like them because they exhibit behaviors that i associate with autism," that's fucking gross and insulting!!!
Idk I'm tired of reading how I'm anti-women or anti-POC for not immediately accepting her apology and jumping right back in to supporting her. She needs to do a LOT of self-reflecting and attitude changing, as do motorsport fans in general given a lot of responses to this situation. Ableism isn't cool, cute, funny, etc. (Also looking at the fans who repost that RocketPoweredMohawk YouTuber's clips in the tags on Tumblr too. The guy's biggest punchline is "HAHAHAHA lance autistic" yet F1 fans worship the ground he walks on and treats him like peak comedy. Please, find an actual sense of humor that doesn't involve making people with disabilities the punchline of your jokes). It's getting old. It's not funny or quirky or edgy. It's exhausting to constantly run into reminders that most of these people I'm interacting with in my online spaces would never accept me and would probably just bully me if I ever came across them in real life. 🙃
Thank you for saying all of this. I genuinely didn’t even know this was a line of ~commentary (ew) on Lance or Logan. It’s absolutely disgusting. I feel like we’re only just getting to a point where people even understand autism (and let’s be clear…they still don’t lol not really) but shit like this is so gross and only forces autistic people even further into the margins of society. I’m really sorry the fandom is like this. You deserve to take up as much space as you need, and the rest of us need to hold ableists accountable.
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i miss you.
CW: fem! reader, rin being jealous of ur new bf lol, cheating (cheating on ur new bf w rin), rin calls himself daddy lol, nipple play, fingering, making out, bathroom sex, ummm that’s it !!
WC: 400k?
ABOUT: rin would admit, he wasn’t the best boyfriend, but seeing someone treat you better than he ever could, had him riled up.
Rin would admit, he wasn’t the best boyfriend, but seeing someone treat you better than he ever could, had him riled up.
You see, you and rin had broke up 3 weeks ago. You had told him that you were tired of him and how he treated you.
Letting girls flirt with him, putting his arm around their neck, whispering god knows what in their ear and watching them giggle, letting half naked girls SIT on his lap — you were tired. You broke it off with him with a note and all your stuff gone.
Eventually you had met this sweet guy — kita. Always complementing you, saying how pretty you were, taking you out to fancy dinners.
All the things rin didn’t do.
Yet there is this part of you that still yarned for him. No matter how shitty rin treated you, a part of you still loved him.
You and kita went to this party that his friends were throwing. You were having a good time dancing to the music with your wonderful boyfriend.
“Hey babe, do you mind if i go talk to some of my friends real quick? i’ll be back.” Kita said, moving close to you so you can hear him.
You nodded and gave him a kiss on his cheek. You went to go sit down on the couch, and talk with some people in the mean time, until kita comes back.
As your chatting with one of your friends, you feel eyes in the back of your head. You slightly turn around and glimpse at the messy haired boy that you hoped to never see again.
You locked eyes with rin and he’s suddenly getting up walking over to where your sitting.
oh no.
Suddenly you stand up and rush your way to find a room of some sort. You walk around the halls and you see an empty bathroom.
You back up and watch him lock the door.
“You missed me?” he said with a grin settling on his stupidly beautiful lips.
“what do you want suna.“ you asked, adverting your gaze from his eyes.
He snickered, “Suna really? what happened to rin or rinnie.”
You rolled your eyes, “We aren’t dating anymore suna. why would i call you that. Actually, i have a wonderful boyfriend who treats me right out there. So excuse me while i go find him.”
As you make your way to the door rin stops you and backs you up into the sink.
“He doesn’t deserve you.”
“He doesn’t deserve me? god suna do you hear yourself??”
He lets out sigh. “y/n.. I’m sorry alright? i know sorry doesn’t excuse all the shitty things i’ve said and done to you, but i really mean it. i miss you so goddamn much. And seeing you with him… seeing you with someone else but me makes me so pissed. Give me one more chance. i promise you it will never happen again. i’ll be better.”
You start to tear up, rin notices and strokes your cheek and wipes the tears away with his thump.
“Y/n… i still love you and i always will.”
You pull rin into a kiss, running your finger nails in his messy hair that you oh so missed.
Rin grabbed the back of your thighs and sat you on the sink. He pulls away and starts trailing hot kisses down your neck.
“R-rin.. fuck!” you moan, wanting more.
He puts his hand near your thigh opening it, and trails his hand near your clothed pussy. You whine as he starts playing with your clit and rubbing circles on it.
“Please rin…” You whimper, wanting him to stop teasing you and just fuck you.
He grins, ”What baby? tell daddy what you want.”
He pulls your panties aside and starts playing with your puffy folds.
“fuck rin, just need your fingers please…”
“since my pretty little slut begged so nicely for me, i’ll give her what she wants.”
Rin slipped his fingers into your soaking cunt and you arch into him as he slips his fingers in and out at a perfect pace.
You moan and grip onto his back, “Feels good? am i making my pretty little slut feel good?”
You nod your head and let out a whine and he starts rubbing your clit as his fingers still go in and out of your pussy.
“R-rin! i’m gonna come!” You moan, suddenly as your about to come on rin’s fingers, he pulls out and licks his fingers filled with your cum.
“uh uh not yet baby. Want you to cum on my cock.”
He starts unbuckling his belt and pulling his jeans off. You watch as he takes his underwear off and pulls his cock out.
He walks closer to you and starts to align his dick with your cunt.
“You ready baby?”
You nod your head and grip onto his arm as his cock slides into your hot gummy walls.
“fuck..” Rin groans, feeling your tight walls around his dick, feels like heaven he thinks.
As he bottoms out, he pulls out and slams into your pussy and starts moving in and out of your gushing cunt.
You moan and throw your head back and start to wrap your legs around his waist making his cock hit deeper.
Rin grabs your throat, “You little slut. getting fuck in a bathroom while your little boyfriend is out there probably looking for you. you like that don’t you?”
Rins cock pulses as you start to squeeze your soft warm walls around him.
“R-rin please! i’m gonna cum!” You moan as your finger nails puncture into his shoulder blades.
Rin speeds up his pace, “then cum pretty baby. let it all go.”
At his words, your pussy squeezes his cock and you come. Rin groans and he comes not too long after you.
#haikyuu smut#suna x reader#haikyuu x reader#suna smut#rin smut#rin x reader#haikyuu fic#haikyuu rintaro suna#haikyuu x f!reader#suna rinataro x reader#suna rinataro smut
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For the asks - 🌈 (for castles), 🌻, 🍭
Thanks for the newest castles chapter!!
hi!! thanks!!
[ask game here]
🌈 (for castles) is there a fic that you worked *really fucking hard on* that no one would ever know? maybe a scene/theme you struggled with?
so generally, i don't tend to think there's anything that i worked on really hard that you guys wouldn't know about because truth be told, i kind of think hard work ... shows? like, i know you asked this about castles but taking the broader fic question for a second, i think it shows that i worked harder on something like the fault in faulty manufacturing, than i did for, say, a louisville slugger to both headlights. i like both fics, don't get me wrong, but i think it shows when you spend hundreds of hours on something, versus just a couple, you know?
having said that, with regards to castles (but also with writing generally), i think what i struggle with often is probably just knowing how much to show, how much to tell, how much to let you infer. like, for example, this, in chapter 18:
He is silent for a bit. Tired. Ginny bumps the shoulder of his Levi’s jacket against the fabric of his jumper. ‘I mean, I’m sure we can keep yelling about it but we both know what this is really about.’
He breathes. In, out. Feels the weight of her head drop against his shoulder. There’s stuff they don’t even need to say, anymore. Like: the fact that the idea of her using sex to get what she wants out of a world that’s so fucked up it considers ‘sexy’ to be a currency will always make him want to retch. That: he regrets his choice of words, ‘whoring out,’ but. That he loves her - so much, and wants to protect her, and what if this all turns sour? What if she’s not okay , again, like she wasn’t on those nights she woke up next to strangers and didn’t know where she was?
He knows what she’d say as well, though. That time’s passed, that she’s better, that it’s her life and she feels ready and she gets to choose. That Samira’s right, too, that it’s time for women to be treated differently and if that’s something she can contribute to by adopting this persona, that’s not even that far from the truth, then the end justifies a little bit of self-sacrifice for the greater good. That, after him, it took ages for her to feel like her body was her own again, and that now, she likes people looking. That it makes her feel good - powerful. That because of the things she’s done, they’ll always talk about it anyway, so she might as well take the conversation somewhere useful. Control it and take anything she can gain from it. That, also, she doesn’t care if some sorry bloke wanks off to pictures of her in his basement because that’s all he’s ever going to get. That: she prefers Samira’s plan to the alternative, which would be to hide and apologise for herself, and which makes her want to retch.
Under his shoe, Amycus Carrow’s like this piece of gum they can never quite get rid of, Harry thinks. Ginny smiles at him. ‘If that’s all he is now, a dirty piece of gum, then that sounds lovely, actually.’
in the first draft of this, the two middle paragraphs in italics were actually dialogue. i was "showing" (by H&G explaining how they felt) but i felt like that was too heavy and redundant in terms of what we already know (plus, i don't love heart-to-hearts in dialogue, i find them really hard to write convincingly). so, in the second draft, i took everything out. then, i thought: wait, am i gonna get comments from people asking me what the whole exchange meant?
to tell you the truth, i sat there for a very long time last tuesday being like: to delete or not to delete? redundant or not? to me, personally, all of this is inferable. like, at that point, i feel like we know both of them and what their positions are well enough to know that that is what they're thinking. so, i do think it is all a bit redundant in a way. i think i certainly could have deleted these two paragraphs.
i think this is one of the reasons i would love to have beta for castles. like, sometimes, i just need someone to do a sanity check of: is this understandable for anyone but me, or is it just clear in my head? that's a part i often struggle with. i think the reason why i kept it here in the end was that i asked myself: am i okay with people misinterpreting this exchange, though? like, sometimes, you sort of have to cater to the lower common denominator and think even if 90% of people would be capable of inferring that on the basis of their reading comprehension skills, am i okay with 10% not doing so? and here, because i think it's a very important exchange, i didn't think i was okay with taht. especially because i didn't want to misinterpret it by thinking ginny was doing this to piss off harry, or that he was that resistant just because he was jealous, you know?
so yeah, it's obviously easier when you have a beta but it is something i do struggle with a little.
.
🌻what makes you want to give up on writing? what makes you keep going?
lol, that exhausted, burnt out post from this summer will haunt me for decades, won't it?
more seriously, what makes me want to give up is capitalism. what keeps me going is spite.
.
🍭why did you start writing?
i think that's such an interesting question, which i don't have the answer to. for a lot of people, they seem to get into fandom, start seeing fanfics and are like: "oh, i'd love to do that too," or "i'd love to provide my own take" and start writing like that, as a hobby they more or less consciously picked. i think that's super cool.
that wasn't really my case, though, in the way that i was writing (albeit badly) before i even discovered fandom/fanfiction. i just loved writing from as far back as i can remember. i always tell this story but when i was 4/5 years old, i couldn't even write yet, but i had a babysitter and i would dictate stories to her. i would fold sheets of paper like a book and would do the drawings. then, when something needed to be written, i would ask her to write it down Exactly How I Wanted (yes, i was born type A ^^). so, i guess even back then, before i had even learnt to write, i already loved "writing", you know?
but also, it's difficult because i think that's something a lot of children do - i don't think i was "exceptional" in that sense. yet, they probably don't all end up being writers. and, as i've said before, i'm not really someone who believes in talent or in something "innate," when it comes to writing. so, of course, if you asked me where my current skills come from, i would obviously say "hard work", that's easy. and, obviously, a massive dose of privilege in being born in a country and to a family where it was possible to foster writing skills due to an array of economic and social advantages - but anyway, what i mean to say is that i don't think writing skills are innate, i think they are learnt.
having said that, as much as i like emphasising the fact that writing is work (and therefore, you can hone those skills), there is still this question of: why did you pursue it, versus 1) other people born in roughly the same conditions and 2) other hobbies like painting, music, etc.? the question being, in sum: why did you start writing? and, that, i can't explain. my mum loves reading, but she's not a writer (or an artist in general, tbh). my father was a wannabe writer but never did much with it and i didn't grow up around him at all. my maternal grandmother apparently loved writing really long letters to her children after they left home, telling them about life - could it be genetic somehow? i reckon there are enough nepobabies trying to follow the footsteps of their talented parents and miserably failing for us to conclude that it's probably not, though.
to me, it's the age-old question of: why do artists start making art? why are artists artists, and not everyone is an artist? because although i believe in hard work, i also believe that you either are a writer, or you aren't. and i don't think it has anything to do with being published or not, being "good" or not ("good" is not an objective standard, anyway), or being "successful" or not. i think it has to do with an inexplicable "spark" that exists in some and not in others. by which i mean: there are people on AO3 who publish very good, high quality stories, but for whom writing is a hobby. if they stopped tomorrow (because #life), they would probably miss their hobby (and their fandom friends, etc.) but they wouldn't collapse. it's a bit like me and hiking. i love going on hikes but if i don't go for 6 months in the winter, i'm fine, you know?
writing, for me, is totally different. if i don't write, i can't breathe. if you wanted to, you could literally track my periods of depression on my AO3. all the years i didn't post a single thing - those were the darkest times where i couldn't get my head out of the water. it's also why i'm ready to sacrifice so much for it, my weekends and my sleep - because i have learnt over the years that me not writing is worse than me writing to a level of true exhaustion. of course, stopping short term as a breather is fine but long term, for more than a few months? it sounds like a good thing at first, but it really isn't. and so regardless of talent, regardless of kudos, regardless of potential publishing deals, regardless of everything else, writers write because they need to, or else they will collapse.
and, that - that, i can't explain why.
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LO RANT:
Okay I just have one thing to say and it’s of course in defense of one of my all time favorite characters Thanatos. Something I’ve noticed is that no one ever checks Hades for verbally abusing his employees and insulting them. I know the same thing happened with him with Minthe and I feel terrible that that had to even happen in the first place but I hate that he can get away with it. In no way am I saying that it was his fault or anything but I am uncomfortable with the way he can get in everyone’s faces and start yelling and screaming insults and degrading them, even doing as much as invading their personal space and grabbing them physically and no one calls him out on it. That’s super annoying to me because his employees do not deserve to go into such a violent and hostile work place all the damn time.
Like honestly can you imagine working under Hades and being scared out of your mind and paranoid that if you do anything slightly wrong he’ll blow up on you? Or imagine trying to publicly speak in front of your peers just for Hades to humiliate and embarrass you in front of everyone who respects you or who gives you respect? Or even if he’s just angry and “stressed” and he gets up in your face and starts putting his hands on you, grabbing your clothes or putting his fingers in your face. Hades is a disgusting boss and I’m tired of hearing from him. His employees do not deserve to endure such abuse every single fucking day they have to come to work, they do not need to worry about the job that they worked so hard for being taken from them because Hades found another emotionally immature and unstable girlfriend, they do not need to worry about all of their accomplishments and hard work being put down and squashed under his feet just because he had a bad day. I don’t care if “he’s better now” because honestly it doesn’t seem like he cares about everything he puts his staff through. These people are people as well, I know they’re not gods or anything but they should be respected too. It’s not just Hades in that damn corporation doing every aspect of the job he has a whole team that he continues to take credit off of and just utterly shit on whenever he can.
Speaking of the damn “that was in the past” or “he’s better now comments” I really hope the people that say that can realize that this man makes people suffer every single day. In the trial he literally made the whole underworld go bankrupt and held the whole realm hostage, without seeing their loved ones or family, and for those saying that was 10 years ago even after Persephone and Hades “fixed” the underworld they didn’t even bother to check if any of their own citizens were okay. Think about it, they could’ve fell asleep anywhere and there could be instances where they would need medical attention, he literally only cared about the interior of the underworld and hasn’t even thought about them yet. He didn’t issue an apology for his immaturity as a king nor has he shown efficient leadership skills, this man has not and will never be caught dead surrounded by his own community. Never have I ever seen him interact with a citizen that wasn’t him abusing his power and threatening them. He doesn’t care about them and he surely hasn’t gotten better now. In order for him to get better and to change he’ll need to actually start apologizing and treating everyone around him who isn’t Persephone like a normal ass person, and even then I’m sure no one would forgive him because of centuries of mistreatment. Hell I wouldn’t, he doesn’t deserve respect nor does he even deserve to be blessed with such efficient citizens and actually because of all of this I’m bringing back my appreciation posts about them because if Hades isn’t going to acknowledge these people I fucking will. Tired of his shit fr.
Anyways that’s the end of the rant, I’m sorry for it being long but I just wanted to say it because it really does irk me how badly he treats people yet no one will even try to talk about it. I don’t even wanna watch this man find happiness and get away with being such a disgusting person, I want to watch the underworld citizens riot or some shit like real justice. But as I always say these rants are meaningless and very all over the place so none of this should be taken as fact or fuel to just randomly attack LO fans because that’ll never be cool and it’s very weird honestly, just don’t do that. If you agree or disagree is both cool with me and I’m down for either I don’t mind.
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