#I’m about to knock tf out bruh | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

onelittlespiral · 5 months

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You should definitely do a preppy boy tf!

FML: Contact

I knew I should have charged my phone before I left, but I was running late and didn’t want to miss my study session. I know, I know it was stupid. But the walk was only supposed to be a few blocks. I have no idea how I got this lost. It felt like I was wandering for hours, but I kept just going around in circles and ending up in front of this gym. Great, just what I needed before finals week. Maybe I should stop an- ugh. My bag spilled out in front of me as I wa a knocked to the ground.

“Hey, sorry bro.”

It seems like on about my third time around the block I finally ran into one of the gym’s patrons, idiot. For the life of me I will never know how those guys will walk out in shorts in December. I started to scoop my belongings back into my bag.

“Here, let me help- Ah fuck, that could be bad.” He picked up my laptop and handed it to me. Thankfully it seems that there wasn’t any real damage, but a few deep scratches were carved in the metal and the screen was definitely cracked.

“Just what I needed today! Look where you’re going next time!” I was nearly in tears. I was lost, I was frustrated, I think the fall tore a hole in my khakis, and now my computer would be busted till after finals.

“Hey, I said I was sorry. Didn’t mean to knock a shrimp like you down. I didn’t even hit you that hard…”

“Well sue me if I don’t have time to get swoll bro,” I spat, “but some of us have finals to study for.”

“Oh dang, that’s where I know you from! English 110, with Professor Kim. Yeah, you’re always in the front and answering shit.” Immediately the puzzle pieces clicked. I can’t blame myself for not recognizing him. He must have been one of the dudes who sat in the back, and they all basically acted, talked, and looked about the same. A bunch of gym rats struggling through the gen eds. I’m genuinely surprised he can to class often enough to recognize me. “Hey man, are you studying for this final later? I’m just like not getting this stuff. Like, why are they having Exercise Science majors out here studying English anyways?”

“Uhh, yeah maybe.” At this point I was past the point of caring about this conversation. It was such a simple class I hardly had even glanced over the study guide. I had packed my things and was making to get up and leave.

“Here bruh, lemme help you up,” and he extended his hand to me. I grabbed hold as a small shock passed between us. It was just a split second, but as his calloused, sweaty had grasped mine, I felt a jolt that stuck my hair on end. I hardly had time to notice as he hoisted me up. “Hey, if you do end up reviewing later, maybe give me a heads up. We could do a study session or something.” He pulled out a pen and scribbled on the back of a receipt. Grabbing my hand again, and pulled me into a bro hug before I could protest. Up close he was warm and humid, sweat cooling in the cold winter air. He left the paper in my hand when he pulled away. He smirked, “You should ask inside, they may be able to help. I’ll see you later tonight.” There was a confidence in his voice that sent a chill down my spine. Before I knew it he had booked it, and I was left with a piece of paper, a broken computer, and a sinking realization I was still lost.

With few options left, I popped into the gym my classmate had just come out of. Maybe they would have a charger I could borrow or be able to help me with directions. At least it was warm inside. I walked over to the man at the desk, asking “Hey, sorry to bother. Do you all have a phone charger? I am completely lost and out of juice.”

“You can bother me any time,” the attendant said with a wink, “We’ve got some chargers in the locker room, but management is struck about people using facilities without paying. You already a member with us?”

“No, do I look like a member with you all? Please, I’m tired and at this point I just need to get home.” I groaned.

“Well sorry bro, you’ve gotta get those gains somewhere… let’s see, a day pass only runs about $5,” he slid the card reader to me.

“Fine.” I thrust my card into the machine and grabbed my receipt, storming off towards the locker room.”

“Enjoy your time! Oh, sir. Those aren’t the locker rooms they are the changing ro-” and the swinging door cut him off. I cut to the first door on my left. The overhead lights activated as I walked in. The inside was warm, hotter even than the lobby. For locker rooms, there were very few lockers. Just cooler with some sports drinks, some mirrors, and a charging station. No one else was inside, so I sat down on a bench and set my phone down on the charging station. With the heat I quickly began stripping layers, till I was down to my sweater, but I was not going shirtless in this place. It looked like it would be a while before my phone would be charged. I tried to put the whole situation out of my mind as I laid back and relaxed, carried to sleep in the thick heat…

I woke up a while later, disoriented and thirsty. It may have been a bad idea to sleep in the sweater, the thing was practically dripping in sweat now. I began to pull off the damp thing when I was shocked to see what was underneath:

Abs. Pecs. Abs and pecs. I had to be dreaming, when did I go from a stick to having abs and pecs. Not only that, but my arms. Thick and smooth, my arms looked swollen, as though I had been working them out for years. And my legs, they felt like lead beneath me, so heavy I could hardly move them. I could crush a melon between my thighs. And my poor shoes, they were practically in tatters on the floor. My toes poked out of the remains, leather torn between my meaty soles. I looked in the mirror to get a full picture. If I didn’t see it I wouldn’t have believed it, I was a whole different man.

I grabbed my phone and booked it out the door back to the front desk. The same attendant was there, looking me up and down as I passed by:

“Well hey there handsome. How are you enjoying our amenities?”

I just about strangled him, “What the hell happened? What did you all do to me?!?”

“I did try to tell you. Locker rooms are the other side. Those are the changing rooms.”

“What’s that supposed mean?”

“Well, look at yourself. Must have gone for the muscle enhancement, eh? Not a bad look on you.” I could just about wipe that smug look off his face.

“Cut the bull crap, I didn’t ask for this. If you all changed me into this change me back.”

“So sorry,” the apology dripped from his lips, “but things don’t quite work that way. For more specialized changes you have to get a full membership.”

“That’s a fucking lie,” I shouted, “You never said shit about this. I don’t need your membership. Change me back, now.”

“Woah, calm down there hot stuff, no need to get so worked up. How about this. My boss is home for the night. I know what you looked like when you came in. I can sneak you back into one of our specialty changing rooms, and I’ll calibrate it myself. Deal?”

I was about in tears, “Deal.”

He took my hand and lead me to the changing room all the way in the back. Same set up, same bench in a mostly barren room. This one was maybe a tad smaller. His voice came on over the intercom:

“Alright, now just sit back, relax, and enjoy the ride.”

This time, deep red lights came on and that same heat began to fill the room. It somehow felt a bit different. The other heat wrapped around, this one felt like it pierced. In moments my body was flooded with warmth. Sweat rolled down my body as the room began having its effects. But something wasn’t right. Instead of shrinking down to my lithe self, my body felt like it was bubbling, and began to swell even more.

“Hey. HEY! What the hell! What are you doing out there? Wrong way asshole!”

He chuckled into the intercom, “What? I think it’s a good look on you.”

“You’re supposed to change me back!” I shouted

“I said I would calibrate the room. I didn’t say how. You should feel lucky, you’re getting the VIP treatment for free!”

Everywhere sweat rolled my muscles stretched as my body began writhing under the feeling of its growth. It felt… it felt… oh god it felt… so…good. But it had to be stopped. I couldn’t keep going like this. I put all my effort into standing up and lunged for the door handle. It didn’t budge, locked from the outside.

“Oh, is this not to your taste?” he teased “Well, I already did smooth jock tonight. Fine, let’s try this then.”

The red lights switched off as dull LED’s took their place. At the same time, a mist began pouring into the room. The smell made me dizzy as I slumped back on the bench behind me. The haze curled around me and stuck to my skin. It smelled like aftershave, sharp and fresh, with a coolness that made me shiver. My skin began to tingle wherever it touched. I watched as my skin turned to goosebumps, then slowly a fine layer of fuzz began to coat my pecs. It grew and curled wherever the mist lead it. It blazed a treasure trail down my abs and branched out to cover them. I could only moan as my body pushed out my new pelt. It curled around my back as a forest erupted behind me. Working it’s way up, I felt a tickle on my jaw and cheeks. It caressed my face as a five o-clock shadow pushed out from my smooth face, and in moments a full beard was pushed out. It’s curling tendrils even worked on the hair I already had. I felt the hair on top of my head stand on end before following the mist into a thick mop. It worked it’s way into my gapping mouth too, and I felt my throat stretch and adjust, my moans coming out much deeper. Then it concentrated on my groin and pits. My previously trimmed bushes grew wild, quickly becoming a tangle. As my pubes grew around, it felt soooo good. I began getting hard, but the mist only took that as an opportunity. Something else to grow and curve. It stretched 6, 7, 8, 9 inches straight out before curving distinctly up. I was in pure ecstasy, with only the thought of the man outside watching keeping me from fully jacking off.

“Wow, what a grower. I knew you had potential but, woof.”

“You… won’t… *gasp*…get away… with… with this!”

“Oh, still a little rebel in you? Maybe we can bring that out a bit.”

The mist receded, and overhead the lights began to strobe and a loud white noise began to play. The pattern was disorientating and it hurt to watch. But even when I closed my eyes I couldn’t escape. A splitting headache developed as my emotions all turned to anger. I tried to shout, to call for it to stop, but my words didn’t even reach my ears. I watched in glimpses as I began to scream, deep and primal, rage in my eyes. My arm clenched into a fist and I ran up to pound the door down. It still didn’t budge but the shock sent a ripple down my arm. In the mirror I watched as in slow motion a full sleeve tattoo stretched down my arm. I sat down in pain and fear and anger as I grew close to tears. But the back of my mind knew that I could not cry, not anymore. Then, all at once it stopped. I realized I was still shouting. I felt pissed off, aggressive. When I got out of this room, I was gonna pummel that twink into submission.

“God, that one always gets me. I love a man with tattoos.”

“Fuck OFF” I growled. I looked in the mirror at the monster I had become:

My mind was being flooded with emotions, a sense of loss for the person I was, a rage at the man who had done this to me, an animalistic horniness from my sizable new cock, and a deep terror for what else could happen. I channeled that fury and made one last attempt on the locked door. I yanked and rattled the door with all the strength this new body could muster. I felt the handle flex beneath my grip, before a loud *snap* sent me plummeting to the ground. The handle had come off the door. I banging against the door, shouting for anyone to come help me.

“Hmmm,” the attendant contemplated, “I may have gone too far with the rage this time. You’re a beast bro, but let’s reign it in. A healthy dose of this should help.”

A new cloud filled the room, this one thicker than the last. It was damp and sticky and clung to every inch of me. This one smelled rich and acrid, like an arm pit that had long since sweat through any deodorant. It was as though every patron of the gym had joined me in the room fresh from their workout. The fog was so thick I felt as though I was beginning to choke. It slid heavily down my throat and made my eyes water. That’s when I felt it begin to corrupt me. My enraged mind became calm, then addled as my brain filled with the all consuming fog. Memories flashed before my eyes as I felt them slip from my mind, replaced with false copies. I felt my college experience shift from books and classes to working out and tutoring sessions. My classes in journalism and writing were swapped for work out routines and remedial math. Then my cock began twitching as memories of hot workout sessions with my bros filled my mind, replacing my book club. As my mind relaxed and the new memories came to me easier and easier. My IQ was slipping down quickly, resting now somewhere around 75. As my mind relaxed I felt my body do so too. The cloud began seeping into my pores, filling me with its corrupting influence. My body betrayed me, greedily sucking up the cloud until the room was completely clear. I felt warm and tingly, my body pressed flat against the cold floor. I lifted my arm to get a good wiff of my funk. My cock jumped in response. God I needed to fuck. The cloud had saturated me, inside and out, soaking me in a new identity.

“How are you feeling in there big guy?” a voice was on the other side of a speaker in the room.

“Aight I guess man. I’m tired. Guess I passed out in here,” I replied. God, just waking up from a nap and I had my morning wood. The door opened, a cute bro was on the other side.

“Have you enjoyed your day pass sir?” He asked.

“Hell yeah Lil’ bro, it’s been good. This gym is stacked. I haven’t felt this worn out after a workout in a while!”

“Have you considered upgrading that day pass to a full membership? I know I would love to see you around,” he said with a wink.

“Mmm, wouldn’t mind seeing you every day. Gimme the forms.” He led me out to the lobby, I signed a few forms, and handed me a card.

“Now remember next time, locker rooms are over there,” he smirked. “Here, this is free with your sign up.”

He threw a tank top over to me. Good thing too, I think I forgot mine at home. It fit snugly over my huge chest. It made my arms look huge too. Just a shame I sweat so much after a workout, I already had some pit stains going. Shit, I was rank.

“Thanks bro, I’ll see you tomorrow.” I strolled out the door into the cold winter air. I flexed, feeling the breeze wick some of my sweat away.

“Hey, excuse me?” Some dork walked up to me, looking desperate. I felt like I knew him from somewhere, though I couldn’t place it. “Would you happen to be able to help me? I have been going around in circles and can’t seem to find my way. I have an exam in just a few hours.”

“Nah, sorry man. I’m not quite sure I’m able to help. Never been good with directions huhu,” that’s when it clicked, “Hey, you’re in my bio class aren’t you? Ah shit, is that exam today?!? Fuck, I’m never gonna pass that crap.”

He looked a little flabbergasted, but made some excuses and was about to move on when I grabbed him. I felt something pass between us, as his gaze fell onto me, unblinking, “You should check in the gym bro, I know they can help you out.” I pulled away and the moment passed. I reached into my pocket and pulled out two receipts. The first was my receipt for my day pass. I scribbled down my contact info, and handed it off to the nerd. “Here, if you want to talk about lifting with me and my buds later you should give me a call. Looking a little scrawny bruh.”

He took the receipt before wandering towards the gym entrance. I then looked at the second paper I pulled out. Oh yeah, it was that hot gym bro from earlier. Yeah, I could meet up with him for sure. His name at the top rang a faint bell. For a split second, I remembered a friend I would sit next to in class. Smart, nerdy, nothing like the man I had met on the sidewalk earlier... But just then I felt my brain pounding, and I couldn’t focus on… whatever it was I was thinking about. Oh, right. Hot jock. Yeahhh, I’m gonna go see if he wants these rank pits shoved in his face while I ride his cock.

————

Maybe not what you had in mind, but I hope you enjoy anyways ❤️

#hypnosis #bro #transformation #musk #preppy tf #jockification #fml #muscle tf #changing #reality change #straight to gay #jock tf

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1moreoffkeyanthem · 4 months

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TODAY ON Me Never Shutting TF Up About OrangeJuiceVerse:

Let’s talk abt the Disaster Duo.

Aka Kenny McCormick and Stan Marsh. These two… smh they really are each other’s enablers (as Ky pointed out here) in all things. Naturally, I have headcanons that haven’t seen the light of day yet.

Aight so if u know the ojverse, you know that our sweet leading man Stanley Marsh absolutely thinks of Kenny as his Blood Brother In Desperation (someone get this man (me) away from FOB’s discography) and the platonic stenny bond is SO real. They’re always down to do stupid shit together and are 100% the reason Kyle has high blood pressure.

Kenny, on more than one occasion, has done some shit like gone up to Stan like “hey dude you wanna climb the water tower” and Stan didn’t even question it he was just “sure why not” when I say Marj and Kyle were sooo pissed bc Kenny fell off the ladder and knocked Stan off too on the way down lmfao these two idiots were in so much trouble for hurting themselves in a completely avoidable way.

Oh my GOD they set shit on fire all the time out here trying to start a grill because they’ve dubbed themselves the “grillmasters” and then suddenly Stan has no arm hairs. BOTH of them have threatened to drink lighter fluid at minor inconveniences.

As referenced here, Kenny, as a true weirdo artist boy (I’m projecting) once mixed acetone and resin INDOORS (he and Stan were drunk and not thinking) and the fumes were so strong that Stan deadass passed out and it was soooo stupid Kyle was so mad at them. With bigger projects throughout their ENTIRE lives if Ken is like building a big ass sculpture or sum he’s going to Stan and like Cartman will go out to the backyard of the Survivor House to see them dangling from the roof to get the top parts on and just sends a pic in the groupchat to get them in trouble smh

Oh my god I’ve mentioned that Stan had a parkour phase in middle school (referenced here) and who was with him trying to do backflips and vault over walls? Kenneth. This one time they were like “dude we should expand our gymnastics skills” “oh yeah for sure” and they started trying to do that two person cartwheel thing and they THOUGHT they got it down and went to show Kyle but they completely busted their asses like landing in a tangle of limbs and shit (Kenny died) bruh Kyle was SO fuckin mad like “THE FUCK ARE YALL DOIN THAT IN THE STREET FOR” and Stan was all “uhhh cuz it’s a flat stretch of ground? Duh” dumbasses

Canonically in the OrangeJuiceVerse these two are both school mascots (Stan only for the season Kenny played basketball, Kenny through the entirety of hs) and have stupid signature moves that they do in the “stank ass cow suit”. Like Kenny literally gets shot out of a cannon to kickoff football games and Stan does flips that are seriously not safe with the low visibility in a mascot head they actually have no sense of self preservation until someone gets hurt. Ohhh my god one time at a football game Stan was benched for whatever reason and he was BORED so he’s bothering Marj and Kenny and the other cheerleaders and he was full on “wait Ken stand on my shoulders and find Ky in the crowd” so they’re walking around the track like that (stunt buddies at their peak) and no one is watching the game they’re just distracted by whatever tf these two have going on and then the coach notices and is like “goddamnit MARSH! Get on the field!” Smh mans got unbenched for his own safety how ironic

As kids? No one went harder playing superheroes than these two. Cartman may have been the one leaning too hard into the “marketing” side of things (“fatass you can’t call yourself that! It’s a fucking slur!”) but Stan and Kenny were out here terrorizing construction sites bc there was so much cool shit to climb

Even as adults the shenanigans don’t stop dude Stan and Kyle drove over to the city to see Ken and Marj and Ky woke up in the middle of the night and Stan wasn’t there he went to get Marj “dude wake up the guys are gone” guess where the Disaster Duo was? Trying to get into a closed water park by digging under the fence. Yes they were in Trouble.

And when they’re older and Stan’s sober so you’d think he’d be slightly less inclined to do dumb shit? NOPE! He and Kenny are going WAY too hard at paintball and Stan falls off the top of an obstacle bc he was in “sniping mode” and “it’s like irl Fortnite!”

On their own? These two are fairly tame with some exceptions. Together? Someone needs an emergency room.

#please lmfao #south park #headcanons #back on the #OrangeJuiceVerse #bullshit #who is surprised #sp headcanons #stan marsh #kenny mccormick #my beloved Disaster Duo #my shit #ao3 shit #ojv

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eddieismypimp · 2 years

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Where you been at?

Fezco x black reader

Summary: you don’t feel good so you stay in bed all day with your phone on DND, fez gets worried

warnings: cussing

Today has been an awful day. You don’t know if you’ve caught a cold or if it’s just your allergies acting up, either way, it’s kicking your ass. On top of that, you were on your period, and it’s conveniently so much worse than normal. So needless to say, you haven’t gotten outta bed. Even though you’ve been laying down all day, it’s been very restless for you. You can’t find a comfortable position, and when you do, you automatically have to pee. It got to the point where you damn near wanted to cry, but you finally got up and decided to take some NyQuil. Finally, after some time you felt the sweet release of sleep. You had your phone on do not disturb all day and didn’t realize that you’re sweet boyfriend had been trying to call you and text you to see if you wanted to stay over at his tonight. Fez got extremely worried after he tried to call you for the 8th time and you didn’t pick up. He sent you like, 20 messages and you didn’t respond to any of them. It was nearing 4 p.m. when he finally had enough. He sent a few more messages before deciding to go over to your house to see if you were there.

fezzy<3: where tf are you y/n, im getting worried..

fezzy<3: baby, I’m for real worried, please answer

fezzy<3: im coming over, I really hope you’re at home..

“Ash, I’ll be back.” He told his brother picking up his car keys. “I’m going to see if y/n is at home, she hasn’t answered all day.”

“Fezco, she’s probably just sleeping.” Ash said. Of course he worried about you too but he would never show it.

“I don’t care, im gonna go check on her.” Fez said. “I’ll be back soon.”

“Okay.” Ash replied, going back to the show he was watching.

Fez got in his car and drove to your house. When he arrived, he sighed in relief, his shoulders visibly relaxing at the sight of your car. Thank god. He thought to himself. He put his car in park and knocked on your door, praying you would answer.

You got woken up to the sound of someone knocking.

“Uggggh, are you fucking kidding me?” You thought out loud. You slowly and carefully got outta bed so you didn’t trigger your raggedy ass cramps. The knocking still continued. “I’m coming bruh give me a second.” You said, still not entirely sure who would be knocking on your door right now. You opened it to see a worried looking fez and your gaze immediately softened. “Oh, hey, what’s up?” You said to him.

“Where you been at girl?” He asked as his eyes trailed over your body and you realized you looked like you were fresh out of a dumpster.

“Are you feeling okay?” He asked, concern lacing his voice as he walked inside your house.

“No, I’m not.” You said sadly. “I haven’t felt good all day.”

“That explains a lot, I was trying to call you all day and I was getting really worried.” He said pulling you into a hug and kissing your forehead. “I missed you.” He admitted.

“Im sorry I worried you.” You said laying your head on his chest. “I missed you too.”

“Wanna come stay with me tonight?” He asked you.

“I do really want to but I don’t want to get you or ash sick, i don’t know if it’s contagious.” You said.

“Well, I want you to come stay so you should get some stuff ready.” He said kissing you on the top of your head.

“Okay.” You said, going to get an overnight bag.

“Are you hungry?” He asked.

“Yeah, kinda.” You said putting your stuff in the bag, not forgetting your phone charger and bonnet.

“When we get home I’m gonna make you some food.” He said. “I just want you to lay down and rest, imma take care of you.”

You smiled at him. “You don’t have to do that babe.”

“I know, but I want to.” He said coming up behind you to hug you. He leaned his head on your back. “I missed you so much, don’t ever scare me like that again.”

You laughed. “I’m sorry that me laying in bed and dying is an inconvenience to you.” You said, turning to give him a proper hug.

“Yeah, it sure the fuck is, don’t do it again.” He said in a playful way. “Now come on baby, let me go take care of you.”

“Okay.” You said giving him a kiss before pulling away to grab your bag.

You don’t know how you got so lucky.

#fanfiction #imagine #x reader #imagines #euphoria #fezco supremacy #fezco euphoria #fezco #fezco x you #fezco fanfic #fezco blurb #fezco fluff #fezco one shot #fezco x reader #fezco fic #fezco imagine #ashtray euphoria #ashtray

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waynedunlaptheorgandonor · 2 years

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oh thank god i didn’t have to wait until 8p

okay, here’s your 11b season premiere review. heavy spoilers under the cut, obviously, and as always, it is a stream of consciousness mess of unedited thoughts that is up to you to untangle. have fun:

i already know i’m going to get scenes out of order but i can only be the person that i am, sorry in advance

but anyway, our story starts off with our special effects crew having way too much fun in the CGI room making walkers explode. it’s like a rly rly rly grim fourth of july fireworks display

oh, and maggie is being chased by a reaper whose name i have already forgotten

carter? does that sound right?

who knows, but basically she gets away, she and negan meet back up, and go and hide, and negan, as he has literally since the start of this mission, is like “can we please, for the love of christ, go tf home?”

and maggie is like “nope, still got Mission(tm) left to complete!”

TITLES!

pop over to alexandria real fast where judith and gracie are having the world’s worst pool party, and lydia, rosita, and that one chick who still wears the stupid kingdom outfit finally notice that they’re missing, but they’re busy trying to keep a horde of walkers from messing up the upstairs, so everyone’s in a bit of a bind

jump cut to daryl fighting some dude in what appears to be a classroom of some sort. they tussle, as boys do, and then daryl stabs him in the gut, and the guy looks SO offended. like “what?? how could you??” like. bruh. that was the whole point here

while daryl is busy suffocating the offended guy to death, leah knocks on the door and is like “[name i’ve also forgotten], are you in there?” (cue daryl strangling the dude a little faster)

daryl bounces just as leah breaks in and sees her dead buddy on the ground. she kneels at his side and says sorrowfully, “no more”

she is not correct

moving on!

i thiiiink it was gabriel’s scene next?

i don’t know for sure, but also i want to talk about it so i don’t care, let’s get into it

gabriel bursts into a room where that creeply reaper priest happens to be (convenient, mb it was god’s divine intervention and/or the screenwriters)

creepy reaper priest is like, “aww, bud, you aren’t gonna kill me. god told me!” to which gabriel is very hilariously like, “um exCUSE ME? god talks to YOU? you’re not even cute, why would god want to talk to a basic bitch like YOU?”

or something, i may be paraphrasing, but you get the gist

anyway, creepy reaper priest tells gabriel that he’s doing god’s mission, and he thinks the reapers are all swell dudes, and he knows for a fact that gabriel won’t kill him or anyone else, bc The Lord won’t allow it”

this is when gabriel and i had a little side conversation

now, gabe and i have not always gotten along. i HATED that motherfucker for at least a solid three seasons, and then fell into a moderate indifference, with vague disgust that the writers thought he deserved someone as hot and badass as rosita

but i told gabe. i told him, “if you just kill this fucker right now, i will let you keep having sex with rosita and only be slightly disgusted by it”

and for a second there

just one fleeting moment

there was doubt

and then yeah, he just fucking stabbed the creepy reaper priest in the gut and was like “GUESS GOD’S PHONE LINE JUST OPENED UP, HOE!”

again, paraphrasing

jump back over to alexandria, or maybe this was before gabriel’s scene, who cares, time is a lie, but a-a-ron, carol, connnie, kelly, jerry, and i think magna are in the barn trying to figure out how to make the windmill stop being on fire so the entire town doesn’t get irreparably destroyed, when a-a-ron hears gracie’s Panic Whistle and kicks into Dad Mode and rushes off to the rescue, telling the others to, “idk man, figure it out!”

back at the world’s worst pool party, gracie and judith are not doing great, but a-a-ron jumps in and saves them both by hoisting them up and out the window, like the mfing boss that he is

but that leaves no one to hoist a-a-ron, so suddenly he’s the only girl left at the party, whuh oh

not for long tho! bc soon a shitton of walkers join him!

it was actually very stressful and much better cinematography than the CGI trigger happy dudes at the beginning

i definitely got my scenes mixed up bc this happened in jump cuts, but to finish it out, a-a-ron climbs to the ceiling and clings to it, and then lydia shows up and is like “dude wtf??” and helps him out

huzzah! a-a-ron lives to be a wholesome badass another day

also ig the windmill stopped being on fire? idk i wasn’t paying close enough attention

back in reaperville, maggie, negan, and elijah are fighting maybe-carter in a hallway. it’s a close fight, but they get the upper hand bc negan found a giant bell and knocked the dude out with it

sure

maggie’s about to kill the dude, but daryl shows up and is like “no wait!” and they’re all like “no, this dude’s trash, why would we save him??” and daryl’s like ‘hostage time!”

so they rendezvous with leah, mb-carter all tied up, and daryl has yet another fruitless attempt at telling a rly angry woman to let bygones be bygones and mb no one else has to die

leah isn’t having it

she has a sniper try and take them out, except...wait a minute...that’s not a reaper at the sniper...is that...?

GABRIEL CONTINUES TO BRING THE HEAT THIS EPISODE!

i was proud of him!

negan was also delighted

leah has no choice but to relent and agree to daryl’s terms, which were that he’d let them all go as long as they never crossed paths again

they start to leave

except daryl made a crucial mistake, which is that maggie is a rly angry woman with a high kill count who is on a huge revenge streak rn, and honestly idk how daryl could forget this after spending two seasons chasing carol around begging her to stop torturing people in the basement and blowing up caves, but i digress

point is, maggie kills everyone but leah

she gets her in the shoulder, and daryl goes after her, but not for any romantic reason. she’s hiding and he’s basically like, “this was fucking stupid. go away or i’ll kill you,” and then he returns to the group

lol, i was just thinking “what happened after that,” but HOW COULD I FORGET??

maggie goes back to the church! to look for skyrim npc alden!

bad news tho!

skrym npc alden is now skryim dead-pc alden

maggie sobs while holding his dead walker corpse. presumably out of joy

also yada yada negan shows up while she’s burying alden and tells her “you murdered all those people out of revenge, and like, you don’t suuuper like me, so i’m not feeling like this is really such a safe place anymore for me to live my truth, so i’m gonna bounce”

so ig negan’s gone off on an adventure

here’s hoping we don’t have ANOTHER negan bottle episode

mb he and leah will go shack up and he’ll give her the many venereal diseases i’m sure he contracted from alpha

ok recap is getting long, highlights:

gabe and daryl talk faith. it’s fine

daryl gets dog back. good!

carol and jerry are waiting at the tower at alexandria when they return, and they’re kind of like “yay, but also like...didn’t you guys leave with like fifty other people, why are there only four of you?”

daryl goes on a hug fest with the kiddos, carol, and connie

for those of you who are concerned for whatever reason, the hug was exactly what you would expect two good friends to share after one friend thought the other one died in a terrifying cave explosion

for ppl who want to do a little bit of analyzing that may be on the cusp of taking things too seriously, it is worth at least noting that they cut to carol’s expression right after the hug, and carol is explicitly in the frame when daryl is talking to connie

do with that what you will

OKAY MAGGIE BACKSTORY FUCKING OVER THANK GOD

TIME FOR THE FUN SHIT!!!

stormtroopers show up at alexandria, accompanied by eugene

eugene does a nice little introductory speech for lance, who steps up in his nice fancy suit and is like “good evening ladies and gentlemen, have i got a wonderful opportunity for you!”

then it literally cuts to carol, daryl and maggie standing there with identical :\ expressions. beautiful. exactly the dynamic i was hoping for

it then jump cuts to six months later, where we see maggie at hilltop facing off with Stormtrooper Daryl, which, as you know, is the daryl that lives rent free in my brain at all times now

this isn’t a permanent time jump, we’re going to see what happens in between obvi, but we got a fun li’l teaser

they also had the trailer for next episode, and BRUH. FINALLY. FUCKING. COMMONWEALTH. IS. THE. HOT. TOPIC.

that single teaser trailer gave me more serotonin than the entirety of the reaper arc

it also starts off with caryl talking, so yes, our babes are getting back together and are going to be exploring this strange new world together, and i hope that it is MISERABLE for them there

and what if they have scenes with princess??

am i...excited?

am i...looking forward to a walking dead arc for more than just caryl?

see, that’s why i stan kang. if she can make commonwealth as good as she made the whisperers and have me be invested for more than just whether or not daryl and carol are fucking then i know she must know what she’s doing

not to say that my main focus isn’t daryl and carol fucking

which i hope they do

after they dismantle capitalism

whew buddy, i am hype

i should probably be less hype, just in case it’s terrible, but at the very least i know i get to see princess again soon and carol in that hot flannel, and those two things alone are enough to sustain me for quite a while

last thing i’ll say is that in the little post-episode thing with kang, she literally didn’t even MENTION leah and daryl’s relationship

didn’t come up for a second

and she is clearly so much more interested in commonwealth. i genuinely think she’s over the reapers too, bc what they have set up for commonwealth is going to be fun as hell

at least here’s hoping

god this is so long, my laptop battery is almost dead and i need to go put shelter laundry in the dryer, what am i doing with my gd life

sign-off time

stay hype, stan kang, and get daryl to go down on carol for five hours straight 2k22,

-diz

#caryl #twd #twd s11 spoilers #dunlap tp

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dreamii-yume · 3 years

Text

SPOILERSSS for Twisted Wonderland Chapter 6 : 1-16!!!

*rubs hands* aight it wont take long before genshin has me in its gacha hell grasp again, I just barely escaped this time— NOW ITS TIME TO SEE THE BOIS CHAPTER 6 omg— wtf happened last time lol it’s been too long

So, no voice over because of some problems which is understandable but— meh I don’t feel like reading lol So I’m watching otome ayui translations this time, because im that one dumbass student who skipped kanji class and now i cant read without sounding like im five _:(´ཀ`」 ∠): “what up im yume im way passed 19 and i never fucking learned how to read”

Also watching Hanayura Kanon stream for the rest that’s not yet been translated lol Because he’s very good at voice acting for the characters and he’s funny af lol

- OKAY OKAY— WTF HAPPENED EXPLAIN

- Fun fact : I haven’t watched Hercules yet so I legit don’t know what’s about to come lol

- Aw, that’s cute— We called over Ace and Deuce late at night AND THEY REALLY CAME OVER AAAAA

- I forgot how fckin pure their friendship is _:(´ཀ`」 ∠):

- Aight, so we actually have a huge-ass scratch from feral Grim lol That’s just fantastic, isn’t it

- FINALLY— We’re talking about Mickey and the stones my monster cat has been eating with Crowley AAAAA

- “Yeah there’s this bitch called mickey and i took his photo—“

- WE’RE FINALLY TALKING ABOUT THIS. AFTER 6 CHAPTERS.

- Bruh this crystal of blot sounds really dangerous why are we discussing this just now

- Speaking of this crystal, Crowley— you were looking for this crystal in chap one and when we asked you about wtf you’re trying to find you just went— “oH itS NothING.”

- I SUPPOSED ITS NOT NOTHING NOW IS IT

- I didnt see you searching for crystals after every chapter mr. crowley where were you 👁👄👁 dont you think it was weird that you didnt see a single one after like— five blotting incidents

- Oh so its rare i see— BRUH R U SURE ABOUT THAT grim literally found one every single chap LMAO

- Okay okay— see, he may be violent but listen— you aint gonna throw out my fucking cat okay

- Wh— THERE WAS A FESTIVAL!? Im dumb so its not just VDC LOL

- Listen LISTEN— GRIM IS FINE. HOLD UP— NO NEED TO THROW HIM OUT JUST LET ME HAVE ANOTHER LOOK AT HIM

- Aww, Ace and Deuce looked pissed about it too AAAAHH THE TRUE DEFINITION OF THE BOIS

- BRUH NO— ALL THE DORM LEADERS TO GO AND CAPTURE GRIM?? HE’LL DIE

- CROWLEY PLS— WE CAN TALK ABOUT THIS, HONEY

- #Grimportectionsquad

- “It’s bout time for them to come” Who?

- FUCKING— CROWLEY STOP SAYING ITS NOTHING— This is why this school is so fucked, you never tell us anything ahead of time _:(´ཀ`」 ∠):

- Aight he left, Ace Deuce hurry help me what you guys got

- He may be a monster but see— the worst he did is eat the whole tuna stack SO PLS HES STILL BABY AND I LOVE HIM

- THATS RIGHT DEUCE MY MAN GRIM CAN DO NO BAD I SWEAR

- HE WOULDNT EVER AGAIN I SWEAR

- Ace ヽ(；▽；)ノ The character development— im so proud of you, son

- THIS IS THE BOISSS— LETS GOOOO

- Fuck this is so beautiful— just me and the bois on our way in the middle of the night to find our MISSING CAT I—

- CROWLEY REALLY DID ASSEMBLE THEM DORM LEADERS AAAAAAA AT THIS HOUR TOO WTF

- BRUH WE CAN TALK

- Kalim Kalim Kalim Vil Vil Vil— Pls we’ve been through so much last chapter ＨＥＬＰ

- Leona…A big fat ｍｏｏｄ honestly lmao

- Ey ey riddle pls— dont make this any more difficult—

- Shut up azul stay where u are all you’ve done is nothing but chaos since you arrive so SHHH

- MALLEUS IS NOT HERE AGAIN LILIA PLS— where is he when we need him the most LOL

- Ortho, your bro where?? Also— SURVIVAL STATUS BRUH—

- YES PLS DONT HURT HIM OMG

- oh i forgot idia lives in his tablet LOL OF COURSE

- Omg he’s in the apple trees still looking scary as shi aaaaaaa pls kitty come home u just had too much catnip

- OH GOD 15m HE’S CLOSE

- “Starting operation” ORTHO WHAT TF

- EY EY EY oh good he’s knocked out sighhh

- Aight I know this has been translated but I can’t help but to look at the original japanese and im just— wtf is RTS and TAS idia i dont understand this advanced gamer otaku language

- But Idia and Ortho really do be speedrunning on who can fucking kick my cat the hardest LOL

- THATS RIGHT IDIA You understand me— Fellow cat lovers unite, Grim is very cute, he can’t do no bad

- …so can i have him back pls—

- Can we just appreciate the fact that these bois are willing to take the risk of getting their heads chopped off by Riddle by doing all this for us??

- If this isnt what you call true friendship then i dont know what this is

- Lol ambrose is going to appear in this festival again and crowley’s prideful ass is QUAKING

- WHY are we not allowed to see him crowley im sure we can handle it— We’re the BOIS. CMON

- Imagine if they just summon a fcuking— magic vet or something lol

- It’s the next day lol

- HAH ITS THE VDC LOSERS BY ONE VOTE SQUAD

- I mean the NRC Tribe— ٩( ᐛ )و

- VIL. what you have my queen

- Vil pls dont remind me that my cat isnt here but thank you for saying thank you i do not deserve—

- AWW THE ADEUCE SQUAD LOOKS SO SAD AAAAA

- Vil i miss the bad bitch but absolute oneesan energy but the apology— yeah are we gonna cry again lol

- AAAAAAHH why am i so proud— THAT vil is apologizing

- You dont need to maam what we had in chapter 5 was a fucking journey i regret nothing

- I swear if rook goes like— bitch that aint beautiful imma bonk him I WILL DO IT dont think i forgot what u did last chap

- Man i love me a man who can openly admit his mistakes MMMGH

- Rook i swear—

- Im glad that we’re not toning down ace’s brutal honesty lol

- BRUHHH I DONT LIKE IT WHEN VIL US TAKING ALL THE BLAME i mean what he said was kinda true BUT STILL

- Cheer up Vil, it’s not like it’s a complete failure anyways (；ω；) it was fun at least

- Hearing Jamil encourage Vil like this feels surreal BUT YES BOI U TELL EM

- What is this beautiful character development

- Ooff way to hit where it hurts the most vil my queen lol

- AAGH IT HURTS VIL RECOGNIZING NEIGE’S HARDWORK LIKE THIS— THE PRIDE I CAN FEEL IT ＣＲＡＣＫ

- Bruh we appreciate Neige’s impeccable smile in this household— REMEMBER WHEN EVERYONE WAS LIKE NEIGE’S GON BE A BAD BOI??? WELP—

- It was me, i was that person and i shall drown in apple juice for it

- Of course, the ultimate Neige simp already knows that lol

- Bruh the background music has no business being this sad　ｓｔｏｐ

- I hate it when vil is right sometimes omg— TRUEEE KALIM especially wouldn’t be able to stand properly on stage after knowing Neige’s own hardships aaaa

- NOO BABY DONT CRY

- Vil redemption arc??? 👀👀 you can help us cure our cat—

- !? Are we gonna get that money promised in that poster?? 👀👀

- WHAA FUCKING WAHAA VIL IS GONNA PAY THAT US??? THE WHOLE 5 MIL EACH??!! VIL CALM DOWN WHAT I SAID WAS A JOKE

- Damn vil is ＳＴＡＣＫＥＤ He really didnt want to owe anyone anything LMAO YES QUEEN

- WHA— KALIM IS ACCEPTING??? OUT OF EVERYONE HERE, I DID NOT EXPECT YOU TO ACCEPT THAT KALIM

- Kalim is making my heart go boom boom again baby boi ✨👁💧👄💧👁✨✨

- HE’LL DONATE IT TO THE RAMSHACKLE DORM BABY BOIIII

- …sumimasen kalim for having a very rundown dorm 👁💧👄💧👁 but thank you for being nice about it lol

- OKAY OKAY KALIM YOU DONT HAVE TO LIST ALL THE THINGS WRONG IN MY DORM PLS—

- THIS IS EMBARRASSING PLS KALIM IM SORRY FOR BEING POOR

- But this man be such a sunshine holy shit i cant even be mad about it lol

- AW YEAH RAMSHACKLE DORM IS GONNA GET A MAKEOVER

- EVERYONE BE DONATING THEIR MONEY TO US AAAAA Were they always this NICE

- Aight adeuce pls— y’all dont have to force yourself to donate my guys (´；ω；`) being friends is enough lol i get it my bois

- Find me a man who can make me feel like this the way Vil can

- Man if only Grim is here :’) he’d be soo happy :’)) you can have all the tuna you want buddy :’)))

- GRIM PLS ADEUCE IS WILLING TO TREAT YOU TO LUNCH BABY

- Bro this is so wholesome omg

- Im sorry but still up to this day, my understanding of Epel’s accent is still　ｌａｃｋｉｎｇ lmao

- Aight they be talking about how Rook already knew that they were going to lose from the very beginning

- The FORESHADOWING LOL The difference with how Rook said “What a wonderful performance” rather than “What a beautiful performance” sigh

- Honestly we gotta respect Rook’s resolve here lol man just knows what he wants

- Rook and Vil’s friendship lmao

- 👁👄👁 …!?

- EARTHQUAKE WTF How dare you ruin such moment—

- WHAT IS GOING ON

- EY WTF DONT DESTROY MY DORM WTF ARE YOU GUYS

- WHAT ARE THESE ROBOTS OUTSIDERS KILL THEM WITH FIRE

- They look like something that belongs to the Ignihyde dorm HUH

- Oh bruh— Vil in his Dorm Leader mode is so cool AND YES I KNOW THIS IS NOT THE TIME BUT wheww~~ Vil YAS QUEEN

- KALIM TOO AAAAAA JAMIL’S 「はっ！」SO COOL

- so SO— the dorm leader’s have a protocol for outsider attacks like this 👁👄👁 OMG THEY’RE SO HOT

- They don’t seem like our bois anymore aaa just pure professionalism at this point—

- GOD I FORGOT HOW COOL THEY ARE OMG

- HEEEYYY OUR DORM IS GETTING DESTROYED WTF ARE THESE GUYS’ PROBLEM

- We were just talking about renovating it too wtf

- AAAAAHHH HOW DARE YOU— VIL R YOU OK

- Bruh i dont know what is going on but dont touch my man’s face

- They’re targetting Vil and Jamil WHY— overblot men!!??? WHERE ARE YOU— GIVE THEM BACK

- I didnt understand what epel said here lmao BUT—!?

- THEY HAVE GRIM TOO FUCK HE’S BACK LET GO OF MY FUCKING CAT

- WHAT IS GOING ON DARLINGS

- BUDDYY >:’0000 Grimmm MY HEART—

- Are they kidnapping the overblot men?? What— the fucking absolute ｂａｌｌｓ on these robots

- God we’re getting absolutely ｆｕｃｋｅｄ in here

- AND THERE’S A CAULDRON IN THE BACKGROUND LOL DEUCE WENT HAM

- BRING ME BACK MY FUCKING CAT— >:’0000

- I thought there’s going to be a festival not a fucking kidnapping event HEY

- Oh 👀 Rook pls help

- AAAHH SERIOUS ROOK IS HOT—

- IS THE OTHER DORM LEADERS CHILLING WHERE ARE THEY KALIM PLS BE SAFE

- OH RIDDLE IS NOT ANSWERING THEY GOT HIM TOO

- Oh ghad they got him during clubs WTF HOW—

- *nervous hornii chuckling* …angry expression silver 👁👄👁 im sorry

- AAAA Dorm leaders actually be acting like dorm leaders is soo cool i cant—

- Bruh the story is all chaos what is this chapter

- Are they gonna get Leona and Azul too what—

- RIDDLE BABY Jesus christ dont overblot like this again lol

- DAMN HE STRONG FOR A SMOL BOI THO

- Whoever made these robots wtf is their deal lol TO BE ABLE TO BEAT A DORM LEADER—

- …Bruh where is our horned friend when u need him

- Silver and Sebek theorizing with dorm leaders but they took Jamil tho?? It’s probably the overblot men they’re after

- Also Malleus is probably good so you two calm down lol Lilia’s probs having tea with him right now

- Okay, Leona how are you going to get captured KING.

- Omg everything is getting destroyed wtf

- AW LEONA SAVED RUGGIE THATS CUTE AND COOL AF

- Bruh leona these are material robots— cant you just turn them into sand lol

- Oh they do have some kind of brand cmon just turn them into sand pls

- WHAT THE FUCK

- LEONA-SAN!? WHY ARE YOU GIVING UP— OJI-TAN!!!

- OLD MAN WHAT—

- *hearing leona whisper his reasons ✋ 👁👄👁 🤚 okay sir im sorry

- Damn Leona acting like a real prince right now— it’s kinda hot 👀👀

- BRUH PLS COME BACK DONT TALK LIKE YOU AINT GONNA

- BRO WHERE ARE THE TEACHERS

- THE BOARD GAME CLUB

- Idia : “bro we just chilling be cool— MY CHESS PIECE“

- “Aight ortho what’s the situation” “ｆｕｃｋｅｄ＂

- So Idia of course knows about this— why does he look like he’s so done lmao me getting the feeling this isnt the first time idia has encountered this situation before lol

- Man i want to see azul in action too but mehh— Idia told him to settle down cries

- LOL WHAT IS THIS KARONE ROBOTS

- Wait— are they taking idia too?? OH IS THIS THE DOING OF IDIA’S FAMILY

- WHERE IS CROWLEY— THE TEACHERS, YOUR IMPORTANT STUDENTS ARE GETTING KIDNAPPED

- AH THEY ALSO KNOW ABOUT THESE STYX BITCHES WHAT— and they’re just letting them GO whaaat

- Sounds to me that this must be idia’s family taking care of the overblotting students?? Like to protect Idia or something?? I DONT—

- “Gather all the dorm leaders” No, sir, they’re already gone besides my sunshine and the horn boi

- Malleus??? 👁👄👁 TSUNOTAROU

- Pls kill the robots they destroyed my place

- AAH UPSIDE DOWN LILIA long time no see lol

- Bruhh the diasomnia students are so lucky to have Malleus as a dorm leader omg

- BRUH LILIA’S RINGTONE IS SO CUTE LMAO

- Kalim sounds so desperate im so sad

- ARE WE— ARE WE GONNA MEET MALLEUS AGAINNN

- Bruh they just goku teleported their way out of the dorm lol

- AAAAHH EVERYONE IS HERE THIS IS SO FUN

- Wait jack is not here lol did they just forget about him wtf

- Oh shit we here too i did not know LMAO

- S-So are we just gonna..continue school like— like these styx bitches didnt just ruin half the school, my dorm, injure my bois, and took my cat or…???

- GASP AAAA STYX IS A BLOT RESEARCH FACILITY WHAAAT

- So that’s why leona and idia be like bro this is not worth it

- O-Oh yeah— they…they didnt know that Vil overblot— PFFT

- Malleus pls information who are you talking about—

- WHO— LILIA MALLEUS OH NO

- Ey, overblot squad are assembled lol this looks so dangerous

- LMAOO Riddle was sleeping on Leona’s lap for three hours THATS SO CUTE

- Where the fck did they take them, ITS CRAMPED AF

- Bro they’re just exposing Vil and Jamil’s overblot that’s supposed to be a SECRET LOL

- Oji-tan can sound so wise and reliable like this if he really tried lol sugar daddy energy

- Wtf these guys never thought that idia was from a big shot family??? They thought it was just coincidence that they had the same family name PFFT

- AZUL AAAA He was right there my guy BUSINESS OPPORTUNITY MAN

- oh. They finally opened— isn’t this the ignihyde dorm what

- WHAT THE FU— IDIA

- Bro— WHAT WAS THAT IT WAS IDIA ALL ALONG???

- WHAT IS THIS CHAPTER

This chapter is a fucking roller coaster like— literal 0 to 100 ＱＵＩＣＣ From having a moment with Vil and the bois to a FUCKING TERRORIST ATTACK LMAO IM HYPED FOR NEXT CHAP—

It’s been so long, I hope they released the next part soon (๑>◡<๑) I forgot how fine these men are lol at least I want to hear their voices again 👁👄👁

#twisted wonderland #spoilers #chapter 6

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angstyjellybean · 2 years

Text

9-1-1 Lonestar “Spring Cleaning”

✨spoilers✨

Tommi my love

Mmmmm Julius

Cinder fella

Divorce?

Yup

RIP my man Wingo

So it’s her fault he fell down the chute

I love Nancy and Marjan

Oh no what the fuck

Why would that thing have a plug wtf

COACH BOLTON

I love this family so much

He’s making this up as he goes very Judd fashion

Does Mateo have have a lady friend

MATEO AND NANCY

I DIDNT EXPECT THIS SOMEHOW

Short king

Why does he not wanna do this?

I love Carlos so much

Oh this is Catan

Fire fam game night

Why’s he’s getting so mad tf he’s the one that agreed to tell and backed out?

I feel like this is such a weird song to sing infront of your nieces to their mom

PLEASE DONT LET THEM FUCK OR KISS

FUCK THIS

“Hello husband” IVE BEEN KISSING YOUR BROTHER

TK seems so hurt about being told she’s sick of Catan

Girl don’t move behind it nooooo

Poor kids and mom fuck

God he got there fast

That smirk on the husbands face would make me wanna cause a scene too

Fuck yeah thank hell for Owen for once

Looking spiffy Wyatt

Oh he’s severely overdressed oh no

I feel like job interviews should have dress codes

Why does everyone look so mad/sad/disappointed

Knock boots they understood

Carlos resting his hands on Paul’s shoulders like a comforting father I can’t

So it is a height thing

Oh my god Paul Carlos and Marjan resting their heads together

She’s horny rn??? Bruh it’s supposed to be game night

I love how Grace just knows her husband like that

What is Juddy thinking oh lord

Not Tommi and Julius again ugh I love them independently just not as a unit

Oh shit! This moved quick what the hell

I KNEW IT

You really let her get her heart into this and YOU LEAVING

What is Judd gonna do?

Oh thank hell I thought Judd himself was gonna do something, Nevermind yes he is

They gotta stop showing me Wyatt I’m falling in love

JUDD NOOO

WHAT THE HELL ARE THEY DOING LEAVE THEM ALONE

Fuck this

#911 lone star #911 lone star spoilers #judd ryder #tk strand #grace ryder #nancy gillian #mateo chavez #owen strand #carlos reyes #paul strickland

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mythiccheroacademia · 4 years

Note

okay- first time requesting so im kind of nervous, but, hear me. Reader and class 1-A going out for the first time to a club and things getting lit and everyone living in the moment, reader gets a little drunk and wants to dance, so she gets one of the boys to dance with her but things start to get heated in the dance floor? with Kirishima, Sero and Bakugou? pretty plz 🥺

A/N: Bruh, fuck covid. I miss partying, but my ass finna stay tf home because these cases are kind of getting out of control. Stay safe yall. Also, everyone is 21+ in this

Bnha X Fem!Reader

Warnings: cursing, mentions of alcohol and drugs, a little spicy, but nothing you haven't seen before lmao

Kirishima Eijirou:

i hc kirishima to be that one unproblematic frat guy that loves to get lit

so when he heard the class wanted to go to the club, he was so hype

if you’re taking shots, the man is right there with you

bakugo can already tell he’ll be taking care of everyone’s drunk ass when he sees you and kirishima taking body shots off of mina 💀

you and ochako see who can drink three beers the fastest

issa mess

after you’ve had your alcohol rounds, you and kiri are kinda just vibing with the music

you’re laughing, talking, doing a little bit of shameless flirting~

then the alcohol hits you

and, oh look at that! theyre playing your favorite song!

you take kirishima’s hand and basically drag his ass to the floor

you two start dancing and it’s a hot mess for a second bc you can’t see and he lost all his rhythm on his second cup

but then you start looking at how his muscles look really good underneath the strobe lights and oh boy

he’s fine, like really fine

and you were ready to throw some ass

so you did

kirishima is one happy ass mf

he’s had fat ass crush on you for like 3000 yrs

this is legit the best day of his life

you two are really getting into it and denki and mina are hyping yall up like nobody’s business

you get up and fall back into his arms and you two laugh at what just happened

youre smiling at him like the sun and he knows he’s fucked

kirishima makes his move

“you tryna get out of here?” he says in your ear

the look you give him makes him pull out his phone and call up an uber so fast

Sero Hanta:

i see sero as more of a smoker

he prefers to vibe out, but he was in the mood to get a little lit tonight

so he drinks something momo mixed together at the pregame

he’s a lightweight so he sticks to one cup

meanwhile, your dumbass is onto your third lmao

but you two are a good kind of drunk so it’s really fun from the pregame all the way to the club

you two are cracking jokes and just having a good time in each other’s presence

some heavy flirting going on

the sexual tension is kinda thick

the entire class is looking at yall like 👀

they know what’s up

but they eventually go out and let loose bc everyone is kind of off their asses

anyways, the two of you just kind of chill by the bar, but then you see how everyone is having fun and dancing and you want to be there too

“dance with me” you suddenly say to sero

not one to pass up a chance to spend more time with you, he agrees and yall go in

at first, youre just rocking to the music and he’s busting out these corny moves, trying to make you smile and youre laughing so hard

someone accidentally knocks you into his chest and he catches you out of reflex

even people are basically fucking on the dance floor, the atmosphere turns romantic?

you’re looking into each other’s eyes and suddenly, your lips are touching

then yall just start making out in the middle of the floor

(you might not be the only one’s doing it, but don't be that couple yall 💀)

sero starts kissing your neck and pressing up against you

you moan when you feel his excitement on your stomach

and damn that thing was long

yeaaaa you’re ready to go

you send a quick text to the girls gc, telling them that you’re leaving with sero and they start blowing up your phone, teasing you and wishing you a good night

your night was def more than good

Bakugo Katsuki:

the fact that bakugo agreed to go to the club when you asked meant that he liked liked you, but you’re too dumb to notice

he hated clubs, they were too noisy, dirty, and hot--and not in the good way

he’s only going bc to make sure you don’t do some slick shit and embarrass yourself

and to make sure none of the dirty ass little boys pull a fast one on you bc you’re looking good and he’ll fight anyone in the bih

anyways, when you get there, you’re just sipping on a couple margaritas to get you in the mood

all your friends from class 1-A were just talking and having fun until y’all separated into groups

some went to get some food, others were just by the bar, and your group went to go dance

bakugo kind of just chilled in a spot where he could keep an eye out for you before he saw some shady-looking people trying to dance with you

the reason why he charges into the crowd isn't bc he’s jealous or anything!! he just wants to make sure everything’s straight

bakugo just cuts them off in the middle of their talking and gives them one look that sends them scurrying off

while he’s yelling at you about stranger danger, you’re giving him bedroom eyes bc he was totally jealous and that just did something to you

bakugo is too into basically arguing with himself to notice how a slow grinding song comes on, and your ass is already on him

mans is stuck for a whole two seconds trying to process what’s going on, and then he’s on that ass like grass idc idc

he’s here to finally prove to these extras that youre his

when i say bakugo can catch yall...whew chile, he got some hips

as you twirl your hips, bakugo follows every movement, his hand going down to the back of your neck to bend you down more

yall are basically fucking atp lmao

gets to a point where he grabs you against his chest and straight up tells you

“i’m fucking you up when we get to my place”

let’s just say you had trouble walking the next day

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anunvalidcritic · 3 years

Text

LOKI: S1-EP6

(DISCLAIMER: MY OPINION IS MY OWN AND CAN BE DEEMED INVALID TO THOSE WHO DON’T CARE FOR IT.)

It’s D-Day y’all! Unfortunately, this series has to come to an end in order for us to move further into the MCU. But let’s make the most of the last episode my dudes.

For All Time. Always.

not the old timey CAP music

Nebulas will always be cool.

“He’s a friend from work” - THOR

“I can do this all day.” - CAPTAIN AMERICA

“What is grief if not love persevering.” - VISION

Listen, my dudes, you’re already there so if you’re gonna kick the door down then get on with it.

I like the gold filling that this mansion has. It kinda reminds me of this Japanese story of embracing flaws. (it’s been a long time since I’ve heard this so I may be wrong sorry in advance.)

MISS MINUTES?!

She said congratulations like they just finished Jumanji.

You know I liked MISS MINUTES in the beginning, but it’s off with her head at this point. SHE IS EVIL.

HE WHO REMAINS needs to go take his old geriatric ass on somewhere.

It’s the purple cape for me! That shit looks fly af!

Aye this is a very off note side-note but if you haven’t seen LOVECRAFT COUNTRY, I highly recommend that you do! So good and there’s already a second season on the way.

“He’s back.” - AGENT MOBIUS

OFF WITH THIS BITCH’S HEAD MOBIUS!

FREMONT, OHIO - 2018

BITCH SHE’S A PRINCIPAL!!!!! IN THE UNITED STATES EDUCATIONAL SYSTEM!!! Oh sis!!! Bless her heart.... cuz!

“They gave us all a purpose.” - RAVONNA

Everyone’s life has a purpose; it just takes time to find out what that is exactly.

Bro he let her do that.... how tf are you going to charge her like that and then get knocked on your ass??

lol I love the way he said, “Conqueror”.

His ass has been alive (or at least the first variant of himself) lived in the 31st century?! (y’all know what this mean?!)

Well, I suppose this explains why there are only humans working in the TVA.

“You came to kill the Devil, right?” - HE WHO REMAINS

MEMORABLE DIALOGUE

HE WHO REMAINS - “I’ve gone through every scenario. This is the only way.”

SYLVIE - “Or you’re a liar.”

~~~

DOCTOR STRANGE - *hold my beer*

Kmsl this man is trifflin’. He didn’t have to come at her like lol.

What’s happening???

What threshold?

I’ll be damned... where the hell is WANDA when you need her?!

I enjoyed seeing him flap his hand like that lol

“I love this.... all this honesty. It feels like a fresh start.” - HE WHO REMAINS

this is a weird therapy session.

SYLVIE is about to murk this man!

LOKI bruh! Get out your feelings sir!

I’m so sick of the hair flip at this point ebcause I firmly believe he let her do that shit to him.

SYLVIE went into Assassin’s Creed mode. She is not here to fuck spiders!

I’m so sick of this icky yicky shit.

ROFL I would laugh too.

look at her lookin’ dumb af! Ol’ stoophid ass!

but thank you for bringing phase four into full affect!

Everybody in the office is dumbfounded.

LOKI... go find your brother... you could use a friend...

Did y’all see the clock?

oh shit... that wasn’t there before...

THERE BETTER BE AN END CREDIT SCENE!!!

HE’S GETTING ANOTHER FUCKING SEASON!!!!!!????????!?!?!?!?

___________

Well, I’ll be!!! I am astonished that there’s gonna be another season! I really thought this series was going to be one and done like TFATWS and WV but that’s clearly not the case. (Maybe this has more to do with the whole new contract thing.) Anyway, this last episode was extremely short to me! But maybe that’s because they held most of the scenes in the Citadel with just Loki, Sylvie, and He Who Remains. We received many perspectives in this episode to ponder on until the next season! But my friends we must remember that everyone’s a critic when their opinion.

-------

Here are the links to past episodes:

EP1 - EP2 - EP3 - EP4 - EP5 - EP6

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bby-d1p · 3 years

Text

Chapter 1!

Date: August 2,2017

Time: 8:04 am

P.O.V: LaMelo

Location: 📍BBB Estate📍

"ughhhhh!" I groaned and rolled over at the sound of my ugly older Zo brother pounding on my door for me to get ready for school. "tell him to get up he won't listen to anyone else but you and big baller. And as you can see big baller ain't here." "What if he doesn't remember me- it has been two years Zo."I got closer to my door listening to the odd conversation outside of it. Whoever Zo was talking to had a HEAVY New York accent."Ay melo get u- ow!?!"i yelled as i felt the hard wood hit me face "oh my bad" A lightskin girl said. She had to be about 5'4, her hair was out in its natural dark brown curly fro. She had piercings and tattoos all over. She's pure pressure not gonna lie "I know i'm cute but you done staring down at me, we do have school?" she said. "uh why would I be taking you to school I don't even know your name let alone how you got in my house?" I asked genuinely confused. "Zo I told you he wouldn't remember me!" She yelled down the hall."oh well" Zo yelled back, I gave her a confused look. "Wait are you deadass right now?" she asked her voiced cracked in the smallest way. "Uh yea ion think we've met before." I said still confused. "oh I'm Azlia but you can call me Azi."She stared at me for a little longer than usual."No I wanna call you mamas " I said smirking and pulling her close "Ion think ya girl would be okay with that." Azi said laughing and pushing me off her. I already love her laugh and I just met her. "Ion got a girl what is you talking about?" I asked. "Melo stop playing and come downstairs." She said grabbing her bookbag "I made pancakes , sausage and eggs your plate is in the microwave ." Azi said running down the stairs "Thanks" I smiled"No problem." She returned it."Damn Azi you got him using his manners he ain't said that since 08 " Zo said. "How is Denise doing." I said while flicking him off " Pretty swell actually" He said smiling."um no she actually mad at you right now."I said laughing "fuck you" I scrunched my face up."no thanks save that for- wait you can't even save those two inches for Denise"Zo chased me around the kitchen counter."Shut up bitch" Azi was dying the whole time "I'll see you at school Melo ok." Azi said grabbing her keys and wiping her tears from laughing. "why don't we just take the lambo?" I asked . "Um I don't think you little girlfriend would be okay with that. " Azi said laughing bring this 'girlfriend' up once again. "Um what little girlfriend." I said "you serious?" Azi and Zo said at the same time. "Yea I don't have a girlfriend" I said laughing. "Pops melo said he don't got a girlfriend.I heard she clipped you." Zo said laughing. Some bald man walked in and said " melo what are you talking about you and Ashley broke up? He asked with a confused look on his face "I don't know who you or this Ashley is."I raised an eyebrow."Boy if you don't stop playing and take yo ass to school." He said in a serious tone. "Momma who tf is this in the kitchen." I asked "hold on moms I'm coming." Zo said as he went towards the living room. "you better watch ya mouth wild boy" he said "Aye bald bitch- " Before I could even finish ,Azi have covered my mouth which I wasn't expecting because I'm 6'5 and she's 5'4. "Momma who is this and why do you have to walk with a cane?"My voice cracked "Melo? You....ok?" She asked her words were spaced apart and she was stuttering . "Yes no I don't know I wake with zo banging on my door, then Azi a girl that I barely know no offense, "none taken", hits me in the face with my own door, some random man is in the house, you have a cane and your words are spaced apart and you're stuttering ." I said rambling with tears threatening the brim of my eyes. No one said anything they all just stared at me. There were three knocks on the door and Zo had beat Gelo to it zo flicked him of and started dancing "hey babe" some girl i'm assuming was Ashley walked through the door. Zo sucked his teeth and rolled his eyes. Gelo snickered. "Why are you here?" Ashley asked Azi with slight annoyance in her voice. She was cute I guess but she wasn't anything compared to Azi "I'm here because i'm wanted to be here can't say the same about you though." Azi said shrugging he shoulders Zo, mom, and Gelo snickered "ughh whatever" Ashley said rolling her eyes. Azi didn't looked fazed at all."If yall are tryna prank me it ain't workin. idk who you are so don't call me babe, the only person i want to call me that is Azi." I said Azi I both blushed but tried to hide it by looking at her toes those perfect little toes.I an into toe-suckin ight but if I was damn "Huh" everybody I palmed myself in the face "Thinking out loud " I said shrugging my shoulders."Melo, baby you alright?" this Ashley girl but this timed she tried to kiss me. "aye bruh Ion know who you are but you need to chill with allat." I said annoyed "I'm out man Azi you coming?" I asked "uh no I can take my car I'll be fine" She with a genuine look on her face. I got in hopped in my lambo and Ashley soon came running and knocking on my window. "What? I asked. "I thought we were going to school together." "um no were not I don't know who you are." I said pulling off and driving to school.Soon Going Bad by Meek Mill Featuring Drake filled the speakers of my car. I saw Azi pull up next to me at a red light blasting the same song. I motioned for her to roll her window down. "What ?" She asked "first if you wanna be like me just say that, second-naw don't do that if anything you wanna be like me" she said cutting me off. "uh excuse me ma'am; second , if I win this race I get to take out on a date." I said smiling showing my pink and green braces. "No ya lil girlfriend would not like that." she said I rolled my eyes "She is not my girlfriend!" I said hitting the steering wheel"Ok whatever you say just know yo ass finna get blasted in this race." She said cockily before I could even say anything back she rolled her window up. It was a strait shot to Chino so there aren't any turns or anything. Azi started revving her engine so I started revving my too. As soon as the light hit green we zoomed off. she cut me off and I as taken back a little by the way she was switching lanes. Azi can drive her ass off. I wasn't gone let her punk me like that so I had to drive past her just to be funny. I saw her flipping me off through my rearview mirror and I laughed to myself about how goofy she is. As soon as I pulled into the Chino parking lot I saw Azi's green car parked in my usual spot. "looks like you can't take me out on a date". Azi said cocky manner and popping her invisible collar. I hopped out my car. "Um I do what I want I'm gonna take you on a date" i said wrapping my arms around my waist and burying my face in neck kissing it a little. I don't know why but I felt like I had a strong connection to this girl somehow. We were at my locker by now."Dip chill"she moaned a little "You can't be grabbing on me like you used to you got a girl ok."She huffed "I don't have a girl me and Ashley never dated and if we did or still do were over i'm gonna tell her after school!" I said annoyed I heard sniffles behind me "If that's how you feel melo then so be it." Ashley said. "No that's not what I meant.I don't remember anything at all." I said annoyed once again. "I don't want to sound harsh or break your heart but when I feel a certain way I'm gonna explain how I feel.I'm sorry but Ashley but when I'm with you I don't feel anything." "Melo chill out I'm not worth fighting for, You and Ashley are well were together until you said what you said I can't get tangled up in your mess again." Azi said with her voice cracking once again. "why do you think that? when i'm with you I feel something that I think that I've felt before. I just I can't remember anything I'm tired of having to choose between people over and over again." I said with tears threatening my eyes. why am I being so emotional? "I need to get to class." Azi and I said at the same time. I swear I'm falling in love with this girl already.We laughed and went our separate ways. Ashley just stood there looking dumb.

Science

"Mr.Ball you're late." My science teacher said I sucked my teeth and kept it pushing my day was already being fucked up. I heard heels clicking behind me "Yo you good?" My teacher asked me "Yea? how old are you?You don't sound like a teacher" I asked. she started dying "melo you a fool bruh for real is everything ok?" "I just said I'm fine can you just go back to teaching." I said with an attitude.There were ooo's going all around the classroom. "Melo ion know what you got going on today but you need to fix. Ian never have I won't have a problem with sending you to the office." she said she sound like she was from New Orleans. I rolled my eyes and went to my seat. "Aye melo you good bruh" some bronwskin boy asked me.He had a nose peircing and half his dreads were red and the other side black. "uh yea" I said keeping it cool and giving signals ian wanna talk. "ight whatever you say dip." he said shrugging his shoulders. "how do you know my- uh nevermind my day is already shitty enough." i said i plugged my headphones and started watching Trollhunters on Netflix not caring about what was going on.

Azila pov

Math

"why are you late Ms.Williams?" my math teacher questioned me. "oh my bad I had to deal with something before class." I said shrugging my shoulders.I'm already over this day. I can't get myself wrapped up in his mess not again, I have to figure out what's wrong with melo he's seemed so off this morning.

SKIP SCHOOL

Melo Pov

"You trippin ian finna go over there ion know them people." I said pissed my day has just been bad all around. "your going...ok." Mommy said .

After two hours of being around people I didn't know, i finally got home. "To prove there is nothing wrong with me why don't we go to the doctor?" I proposed "come on mommy let's go to the doctor " i said with puppy eyes "no" she mushed me "mommmmmmyyyyy pleaaasseeee" I asked annoying her on purpose again."ugh fine" mommy said. Out of nowhere Ashley facetimed me "How do you have my number?"I raised an eyebrow "listen dip I don't know what's going on with you but you need to cut the act. You've been so distant lately and I wanna know why." "I haven't been acting distant I just met you this morning." I hung up and walked towards the car.

15 mins later

"The Ball family,your number room is 082200"

"ooou my birthday" i said dancing "me-lo" my mom just laughed I love when she's happy.

We all got up and walked towards the door

"Hi I'm doctor Amanda Johnson and what will we be discussing today?" She asked, she was really perky, a little too perky "Well melo here started acting unusual this morning".The bald dude said touching my shoulder I started to yank away but mommy gave me that look. "How"? "Well he was saying-Let Lamelo" talk she cut off gelo. he stared in disbelief "I don't think I was acting weird.I woke up to get ready for school and zo and this girl Azi were talkin outside my door and the she hit me in the face with it. I asked her who she was yadayadayada apparently that bald dude is my dad and I got in to it with my science teacher who im guessing i was cool with?." I said recapping everything that happened this morning. "Ok um I'll need to do just a little check up height, weight, the usual." she said I stood up out the chair "holy sh- um how old are you?" she gulped you could hear how intimidated she was when I stood up. "I'm 16." I said nonchalantly."sixte- nevermind lonzo can you help me with the stadiometer" she was like 4'11 "sure" zo said in a weird tone. I sat on the little bed thing. She checked my heartbeat and allat good stuff. "Everything seems to be fine." she said hopping off the stool and started typing away on he desktop."Hmmmmm" The doctor said with a blank stare looking at the computer that's why I hate doctors you never know what they're saying smh. "?Well?" I said "Well there might be a scan that we can do next week to see what's going on with you because that "bald dude" is your dad in fact".She put quotations around bald dude and gave me a weird look. "lady no disrespect but i'm pretty sure i'd remember who my dad is." I said returning her confused look zo slapped the back of my head."ow" I whispered rubbing the back of my head. "Alright I'll see you guys next week." "th-thank you! mommy said.

Later...

Azlia Pov

"Uhh yea oh wait let's get the purple confetti instead." I said to Lee. Today is my mom's birthday so I'm tryna go all out. "Target has better balloons and candles." I said walking out of Walmart "Azi we've been to 8 stores already, are you sure?"Lee said laughing "Yes I'm serious, Mom is turning 42 we gotta go bi-" Before i could finish my sentence my phone started ringing.Incoming cal from Him💕 "Yes?" I smiled"nothing I just wanted to see you're face" he said laughing I rolled my eyes . Before lee could say some shit I muted the phone."Is tha- Yes it is lee now mind the business that pays you" I laughed and unmuted. "why'd you mute ma?" he questioned "Lee was saying outta pocket shit about how I'm always at target." I said rolling my eyes. "You literally got to target Every day!" Melo exclaimed "You in my business don't do that." I laughed"I'll call you later ok? Alright byebye." I hung up"It's his contact name still being him with the heart for me." Lee shut up and help me look for balloons" I said laughing."Tell me why simi just texted me and said: Ik you at target or Walmart get me sum gummywors" I laughed

Aziiiiiii😒

Fuckkk no

Simi😊👎

Azi rs stop playing

Aziiiiii😒

Fine troli or Haribo?

Simi 😊👎

Troli🙏

Aziiiii

Sike you thought hoe😊

Simi😊👎

fuck you monae

Azi😒

Ahhhhhh not the middle name💀😔

read 5:14 pm

Fine i'll get you some

*not delivered*

Simi?

*not delivered*

Aye ho- I mean simii?😃

*not delivered*

Azi

tell simi unblock me or he aint gettin shit

Teneal😘

just like that bett!💀

Teneal😘 sent a voice message

"Azi said unblock her or you aint getting shit. Im tellin momma" She laughed and Simi yelled

16 notes · View notes

ennoshawty · 2 years

Text

robot!tsukishima

i scrapped this from my "middle blockers as things" post but here it is anyways i love hate him

warnings: deaths mentioned, heavy plagiarism from Portal (2), sorta-long, ooc? idgaf, gaslighting, it's just really bad tbh

we are: test subject

you are an ex-scientist turned prisoner turned test subject for your own tests.

TSuKKE11 is your own team project - you helped construct him basically. but after an accident that happened, you got knocked out and the next thing you knew, the robot was complete and angry. he turned rogue after he gained his own consciousness and now he’s in control of the whole testing facility from the control room and watches your every movement

you don’t know what became of your team but you assumed he killed them

mans is just off brand GLaDOS. if u don’t know who that is, GLaDOS is basically an evil salty passive aggressive robot with a love for murder, neurotoxicin, and science. in that order. you can just listen to her voice lines and imagine tsukki

whenever you’re stuck on a test course he taunts you. “oh poor you. need someone to hold your hand?”

sometimes he provides a helping hand but he won’t let you live it out. “don’t think too hard on it that you get a headache. we can’t have you passing out. here you go. try that button.”

and when you move on, it’s an even harder one.

and if you still don’t get his hint, he’ll get salty. “god, i couldn’t have made it more obvious. don’t you have a phd in science?”

he gets pretty frustrated sometimes (which is why he gives you hints). for a programmed robot, he sure doesn’t have a lot of patience.

and even at times he likes to sabotage you for the fun of it. bastard.

if he’s not gracious, then he won’t bother responding to your complaints.

but just because he’s not talking that doesn’t mean he’s not listening. or watching. so you should probably not curse his entire existence out no matter how much you can’t solve the puzzle...

and his tests sure are...dangerous sometimes. like he’s trying to kill you.

but no, of course not. he would never. it’s against protocol, he says. plus, who else would he test without you? the other thousand subjects put into cryogenic storage underground you don’t know of? pfft, don’t make him laugh. “gaslighter? now, what kind of a primitive word is that?”

sometimes when he feels good he plays classical music while you test which is pretty unfitting sometimes - imagine being wheeled into a death trap while clair de lune plays in the background

after a set amount of tests you complete, you are to report to the main room before you return to your bedroom - so you get to see him and hear how well/bad you did. he calls it a reflection, but really, he’s just throwing shade to your face.

“*sigh* not some very good results, unfortunately. well, i guess today wasn’t your day. neither was yesterday. or the day before that. or the day before that. or the week before that. actually, i’m starting to see a pattern here. looks like you just suck at these. do i need to dumb the courses down to your...caliber?”

bruh please unplug that mf

but why tf did the design team make him so...attractive??? how...dare you???

now i can’t even be mad at this mf for too long

but he looks familiar...you can’t place it though

he’s attached to the ceiling, actually, and it has a lot of tunnels which can take him to any room. you can’t beat him like a pinata tho cuz he can just lift himself up and down at will

thanks to being in control of the facility, he knows everything about you.

even your birthday. guess what he got for you as a birthday present?

MORE TESTS! and cake at the end. but it tasted horrible. you were VERY outspoken about the cake. he didn’t appreciate it but neither did you.

sometimes he likes to drop in some...disturbing science facts every now and then.

one day you sneak out of the test areas and behind the labs where he can’t see you

you navigate through empty corridors and office buildings and you finally find your colleague's room where he has all of the files on TSuKKE11 .

you were trying to find out how to disconnect him or if he has any weaknesses, but you found something even more horrifying.

looks like the leader of your research team, akiteru tsukishima was looking into consciousness transferring.

and you found a picture of akiteru tsukishima, with his little brother - who looks so much like TSuKKE11. (huh, maybe akiteru just really liked his brother so much that he designed the murder machine to look like him.)

and then you found akiteru’s reports and read through them and found out that TSuKKE11 is just the boy’s consciousness crammed into a robot’s body

is that the bite of 87?!

you even listened to akiteru’s voice logs and heard the two arguing

so now you’re shook up and you realize that it’s not TSuKKE11’s fault

but he still gotta go down if you wanna see the world again

so with everything in mind, you face him in the main room. “well...you’re finally back from running away. did you find what you need? what, still want to go back outside? like i’d let you. you still have 60 more years of testing to do.” *INITIATES BOSS FIGHT*

and you manage to defeat him! and take over the control room! you unlock the exits and you’re home running free! but something doesn’t sit well with you. so out of a whim, you take that hunk of metal TSuKKE11 and his electronic brain-card-thingy and book it

when you finally settle down in your home you start building and experimenting with it.

so you put TSuKKE11 in a roomba for fun. until you heard his screams of pain and curses whenever he bumped into walls which wasn't...pleasant. plus, he liked to comment on how dirty your house was. (give us a break, we’ve been trapped in a facility for how many months?)

and you finally put him in an artificial body out of the parts you took from TSuKKE11 - you rework his system to give him more of a human consciousness

it works! he’s still salty but this time, he feels more alive than robot.

and now he’s your android companion, without any murderous intent! ...or maybe he’s secretly plotting something. who knows?

Tsukki: Become Human

in other words: even though he tried to kill you, you try to give robot!tsukki a new life and purpose to give back what was stolen from him

#haikyuu #tsukishima #will probably delete later #...lol

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boyle3758 · 2 years

Text

A Day in Life

Warning: I wrote this in middle school with some friends, sooo it's going to be a bit weird lol, I thought I'd just post it and see what you guys think.

(This is my very first post btw)

Description: 3 friends are texting and go to a mall to get some food. They end up passing out and dreaming about seeing decapitated children. Eventually, they wake up and run away from the police into a random house and find a portal and go into it. It ended up taking them into hell. They go back into the portal and they end up in this nice place in which they will live forever.

************************************************************************

STEVE: Hey

ALEX AND ANGELINA: Hey

STEVE: You guys want to hang out today?

Angelina: Yeah where should we go

ALEX: How about that mall

Angelina: so the usual hang out spot

STEVE: Yeah

ALEX: Ok I’ll meet you there after school

ANGELINA: okay UwU

* 15 mins later*

STEVE: WHERE'S THE TOILET PAPER? I NEED TOILET PAPER

ALEX: boi u high

*5 mins later*

ANGELINA: k I’m here hbu

*SILENCE*

STEVE: I think my uber driver bout to kill me

*STILL SILENCE*

ALEX: Don’t worry I’m following you

STEVE: R U STALKING MEEEEE

ANGELINA: Stop being sissies.

STEVE: k I’m here

ALEX: I’m here too where are you

ANGELINA: everywhere and nowhere *in head: up yo ash*

ALEX: let's meet at the fountain

STEVE: I’m by dicks sporting goods

ANGELINA: bruh are you fr “dicks sporting goods” *snorts*

ALEX: Ok I’ll walk over there “Walks over to Dick’s”

ANGELINA: *GETS OFF BIKE* Iḿ here.

ALEX: meet us at Wetzel's Pretzels

STEVE: u know damn well I ain't paying

ANGELINA: Me neither.

ALEX: I ain’t Paying, I paid last time:

ANGELINA: YES YOU IS

STEVE: I like trains

ANGELINA: CALLATE ESTUPIDO

STEVE: #savetheturtles sksksk

ALEX: “Slaps STEVE”

ANGELINA: F U TWO

ALL: stop texting

STEVE: TF MAN

STEVE: WANNA FIGHT

STEVE: IMMA SLAP THE MAN (SHEET) OUT OF YOU

*Bystanders stare at STEVE and ALEX*

ANGELINA: EVERYONE'S WATCHING U TWO*

ANGELINA: *pays* F U TWO. NEXT TIME ONE OF U IS PAYING *Walks away*

STEVE: ok.

ALEX and STEVE: * Follows ANGELINA*

ALEX: Whos that kid over there

ANGELINA: I don't know

STEVE: Let's go see

ALL: * Sees that the little boy is by himself*

*little boy runs away when they try to help him*

ALEX: Let see where he goes * Starts to follow the little boy, STEVE, and ANGELINA follow*

STEVE: It looks like he's headed for the desert

ALL: *Keeps following*

STEVE: I’m scared af

STEVE: I shoulda stayed home.

ANGELINA: you’re a freaking girl bro and what's that over there

STEVE: but you’re a girl

ANGELINA: yeah but i’m tough you’re not

STEVE: wanna go

STEVE: catch me outside

ANGELINA: bish *knocks him out with a chancla*

ALEX: GUYS CALM DOWN and it's a freaking door

KID: *appears and disappears quickly*

ANGELINA: Bish, get back here. *grabs Chancla and runs after kid*

STEVE: oh hell Nah

ANGELINA: Stop being sissies. *whips out Chancla again*

* sees a crowd of decapitated children appearing*

ANGELINA:*Brandishes Chancla at the crowd of dead children and beats them all up*

ALEX: *faints*

STEVE: frick this sheet I’m out *takes ALEX with him*

*everyone zooms away to a door that they found*

ANGELINA: wtf was that?

STEVE: it was my zoomer skills uwu

ALEX: shut up we need to go and to find whatever the hell that was

ANGELINA: *holds Chancla in front of her*

ALEX: put the stupid Chancla away

ANGELINA: fine. *pulls out a belt*

STEVE: omfg let’s just go

ANGELINA: Here steve you can have your belt back

STEVE: why tf do u have MY belt

ALEX: stop fighting we need to go

*decapitated children come from all angles*

STEVE: I’M TOO YOUNG TO DIEEEE

*everyone gets pushed into a corner*

ANGELINA: well I guess this is the end

*whips out her Chancla AGAIN*

This is the first 4 pages lol (theres 12) so it's kind of like a sneak peek, I'll post some more if you guys like it! Thanks for reading! ❤

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imagineitup · 4 years

Text

𝘴𝘤𝘰𝘳𝘱𝘪𝘶𝘴 𝘮𝘢𝘭𝘧𝘰𝘺

𝘳𝘦𝘲𝘶𝘦𝘴𝘵𝘦𝘥 𝘣𝘺: @spideyboipete

𝘢𝘣𝘰𝘶𝘵: fake dating au

𝘢/𝘯: i tried out a new style of hc, so let me know if you like this version or my old versions better tysm <3

- -

you and scorpius are those friends

you’ve got that type of friendship where something clicked and suddenly you were both attached at the hip for years

because apparently having the same brand cauldron in the beginning of first year with the same exact hole in the side means best friends ride or die in first year culture

like what even is this? some psychic shit??

but anyway, with you being absolutely intent on making friends, scorpius couldn’t get rid of you if he tried but pls he could never survive without you anyway :p

since then you’ve both been best friends for life! well, ever since the +1 with the introduction of albus potter

and at first you were super happy because yay new friends

but then they kind of stopped hanging out with you in the middle of fifth year or so and went off into their own little world

and you were a little sad

ok maybe a lot sad

but that was okay because that meant you were able to meet new friends and expand your horizons! you even got the chance to focus on yourself and join some new clubs, too!

who even is scorpius anymore lmao you don’t know him

but anyway

it was seventh year and you were so tired of your friends bugging you to get a s/o

“(Y/N) why don’t you date someone?”

“you’d really hit it off with so and so, don’t you think?”

“just put yourself out there”

ರ_ರ

exsqueeze me

so one day you just can’t take it anymore

and maybe you should’ve thought this through but nO

you don’t pause to think things through

because life is for living in the moment hell yes

“guys i’m already dating someone” (▰˘◡˘▰)

needless to say your friends go insane

like who tf is this humans (Y/N) hasn’t mentioned the audacity™

so like any normal person, you say the first name that comes to mind

“hahaha … scorpius!”

your friends stare at you like they’re in the office

blink blink

“but … weren’t you guys just friends”

“NO”

you’re panicking but

hahahahhaha

“we’re in LOVE”

ur friends are really like ok whatever, but go off

and that is how you find yourself dragging yourself over to the slytherin common room and placing your hands on scorpius’s shoulders

“promise me you won’t freak out”

and ofc scorpius is already freaking out

bc why are you sitting in the common room with this crazily determined face and forcing him to listen to you

and this is how you get into this situation

with scorpius screeching and falling off his chair and you doing your best uwu pls help me 911 face

“i can’t DATE you”

what

you give scorpius your best professional face even though inside you’re ???

bc um is it that bad to date you??

you are confused???

you’ve saved scorpius thousands of times in his hogwarts career in both academics and social standing he can afford to pretend to date you ONCE

“WHY NOT”

“BECAUSE”

ರ_ರ

ರ_ರ ರ_ರ

obviously you’re not getting anywhere and you start to stand up, kind of annoyed

“fine then, ig i’ll just find someone else to date me.” sniff

as soon as you say that, it’s like you’ve flipped a switch and suddenly scorpius is very concerned and almost a little upset

and when you don’t notice him contemplating something, he runs in front of you and nearly knocks you over

“second thoughts?”

scorpius scowls

although it looks more like a lil pout pushing at his lips and he crosses his arms

lmao who is this and what’s happened to scorpius

you shrug and start to leave for real until scorpius reaches out to tug at your arm

“NO, NO WAIT … I’LL DO IT”

you whirl around immediately and you are needless to say, very relieved!

｡◕‿◕｡

“perfect!”

but apparently scorpius hasn’t recovered from his fall from before

bc he can’t stop rubbing his hand against his neck and his face is all blotchy and pink

kinda cute, but in a best friends way. like wowie my best friend looks kinda adorable look at that boy go

but ofc scorpius has to ruin the special moment because he offhandedly says, “shouldn’t we have rules or something?”

rules???

rULES???

this is fake dating scorpius wdyfm rules?

“huh?”

“like … things not to do? maybe one big rule is not ruining our friendship???”

ʘ‿ʘ

he smart smart

“ok easy then, just don’t fall in love with me”

apparently this is the WRONG thing to say?

scorpius is RED like boy is not pink anymore his cheeks are burning red

“you can’t just say that?”

????

you are confused bc what does that even mean

“why not?”

“that’s like ... y-you you can’t just say that.”

you are, if possible, even more confused?

“okay and?”

scorpius blinks

bls this boy has the audacity to just shrug

WHAT DOES THAT MEAN

reader u are duMB af scorpius bout to throw hands here

but he won’t bc he luvs u (▰˘◡˘��)

so fifteen minutes later you guys decide to make three big rules

scorpius had a whole list of like twenty but you narrowed it down to these:

1. don’t ruin ur friendship

2. no kissing

3. and ur paying for three hogsmeade rounds after this is over

honestly you think this is kinda rude considering scorpius is richer than ur entire life but whatever, at least he’s not leaving you out to the wolves

so when it’s finally time to put this fake dating thing to the test, you tug scorpius over to your side of the table at the great hall and make sure to swing his hand

which actually feels kind of nice??

like you’ve never actually thought about this before

but scorpius is comforting

his hand fits right in yours, and he’s so warm

and i mean haha it’s not like this is a new thing, pssh you two hold hands all the time!! but adjkaldjkfl not in a dating way

ur friends are shocked

like they never thought you’d actually show up with a DATE

and bc they’re all ruDE they grill scorpius

but scorpius is best boy

best bf

and answers all their questions like a pro

(▰˘◡˘▰)

(▰˘◡˘▰)(▰˘◡˘▰)

ur so proud

you let ur head rest against scorpius’s shoulder and BITCH

scorpius presses a kiss to ur forehead

AJDKFJDSF

why are u so happy? what is this??

it’s just so gentle and soft and you feel your heart getting all mushy and warm

your friends all give a big collective aww because one, they’re annoying af and yes y’all are cute cute and this is cute

but reader ur going through some existential crisis

and later when you’re walking with scorpius to all your classes, you can’t stop thinking that hey, this fakedating thing isn’t that bad

but whatever it’s just cause u miss spending time with scorpius!

yes, that’s it!

you’re just sad that scorpius always hangs out with albus and you don’t get to see him as much

so this is nice!

you’re just going through some bff nostalgia atm pls wait for (y/n).exe to start working again

anyway now bc of this fakedating thing, you and scorpius just spend so much time together

like y’all have always been best friends, but this feels different okay

scorpius will run over to you when he sees you and wrap his arms around your waist

the first time he did it, he had the cuteness to go “is this okay? are you okay? is this too much?

and YOUR HEART WENT !!!!!

you might’ve blushed

okay you did

but you convince yourself it’s just because ur touch starved

ʘ‿ʘ reader c’mon

but whenever you call scorpius and wave at him, his face just LIGHTS up

and you’re pretty sure yours does too

(ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧ ✧ﾟ･: *ヽ(◕ヮ◕ヽ)

needless to say you kinda don’t want this all to end

because somewhere in the middle of all this, your head has gone from calling scorpius your fake boyfriend to your real boyfriend

and you don’t really want to go back to just being friends if you’re honest

wait hold up

uh oh

UH OH CODE RED

did you just admit you liked scorpius?? in a REALS way?

◉_◉

◉_◉ ◉_◉ ◉_◉

so like the only way you know how to deal with things, you avoid it!

you start to act really distant

and now whenever scorpius wraps his arms around you, you stiffen up

and scorpius like the angel he is pulls away so quickly bc ?? is his best friend upset? uncomfortable?

did HE make his best friend for life uncomfortable? omg this isn’t ok what is happening

everyone can tell sumn is up

ofc they can, what with you going to the extent of running away whenever you see scorpius and scorpius reacting like the entire light got blown out his life

and bruH scorpius may be innocent but he aiNT dumb

he knows your schedule he KNOWS you ignoring him

and baby is upset

because lately you’ve been starting to feel a lot more to him

and now you’re just gone??

that’s not okay and scorpius isn’t just gonna sit around and be sad

if there’s something he can do he’s gonna do all he can to try to fix it!

he corners you one day and holds up an angry piece of paper

“excuse me m’aam/sir but you broke rule number one which is, in case you forgot, don’t RUIN OUR FRIENDSHIP”

“oh haha uh scorpius! hi uhh gotta blast”

scorpius’s face falls

and that was it

you just wanna smush his face together and tell him things are fine and that you love him

wait WHAT

but scorpius is still staring at you with that wounded look

like you’ve just ripped up his heart and torn it to shreds

bc that’s kinda what you’re doing

omg what’ve you done

READER WHAT HAVE YOU DONE

“scorpius …”

his eyes lock onto yours so fast that you’re afraid he’s got whiplash

your mouth goes dry, and for a few moments it’s hard to talk

but you finally manage to tell him that “i don’t think we should fake date anymore.”

scorpius’s face breaks

his eyes go wide, and it looks like he wants to stagger. and he almost does, just a little bit

“is it something i did?”

WHAT

this boy

scorpius malfoy really gonna be the death of you

you’re shaking your head back and forth so fast because NO of course not of course this isn’t his fault

scorpius is still teetering back and forth, and his arms start to wrap around himself. “because i swear i didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable. if i screwed up just tell me and i can fix it, (Y/N), please”

you shake ur head, already starting to panic. “of course not. it’s not YOU scorpius. i just can’t fake date you because --”

you clamp your hands over your mouth

“because?” scorpius prompts, his voice careful

you just shake your head, already starting to turn and run back to your dorms because this is stupid and you’re scared

big scared

but scorpius just takes your hand and tugs you backward a bit, almost like a scene from a movie

you do that perfect little twirl back and are face to face with the one and only

“do you … do you like me?” scorpius asks

that’s it

it’s out

you’re ready for your entire friendship with scorpius to come crashing down

“do you?” he repeats softly

you try to pull away but scorpius isn’t having it

he’s still holding onto your hand, gently, of course, and his eyes are boring into yours

you’re too scared to look because you’re afraid of what you’ll find

but when you can’t take it anymore and finally tilt your head up you realize something important

because his eyes aren’t full of disgust

in fact, that’s further from the truth

scorpius malfoy is staring at you with the biggest heart-eyes you’ve ever seen and you’re confused to how you’ve never seen this sooner

it’s almost like you’re his whole world, and now you can’t fucking breathe

is this real?

your heart’s pounding in your chest so fast and there’s something bursting at your lungs

you nod faintly. “yes. i like you”

the huge grin that spreads across scorpius’s face is everything

he rushes forward to pull you into a gigantic hug, even lifting you up a little as he spins you around and lets out a little happy shriek

“i’ve liked you forever, (y/n), i can’t believe this is real”

what

so u could’ve been dating scorpius before??

“you dork why didn’t you tell me?”

“because you didn’t like me like that!”

BITCH WHAT

“well maybe i was confused” you pipe back

scorpius just laughs, burying his head in your shoulder crook. “i’m so happy right now.”

and honestly ?

so are you (´∀｀)♡

#scorpius malfoy #scorpius malfoy x reader #scorpius malfoy headcanons #scorpius malfoy hc #scorpius malfoy imagine #scorpius x reader #scorpius headcanons #scorpius hc #scorpius imagine

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bitchiha · 4 years

Note

HC of Kiba, Shino, Choji, Neji and Lee playing animal crossing. Do they do it hidden from others or not? Their islands, favorite activities, group interactions (especially) and other things you like.

A/N: Yes!! Thank you for requesting this!! I love writing little fun things like this. I haven’t gotten a chance to play animal crossing on the switch because I was saving up for it w/ my job and everything, but now that Corona has shut down my province I can’t actually buy the switch or Animal Crossing 🥺 I watch gameplays for like hours on end tho and my friends never shut up about it so I know enough to make these HC’s I Hope lmfao and I’ve played it on my DS and phone for timee so I’m educated dw

✎ Animal Crossing x Naruto Characters!

Kiba Inuzuka

He was so pumped for animal crossing to come out. Probably used man the beast clone justu in the game store to make sure that he got his hands on a copy.

He won’t hide that he plays Animal Crossing, he’ll be such a confident douche about it. Once he’s got a fly outfit and he’s starting to get gains he will flex his island to anyone, especially Shino.

He would pick an island in the northern hemisphere and he wouldn’t even strategize tbh like he’s just excited

He would name it like “Dog Land” or “Akamaruville” or some shit like that

He’s the type to read all the things the characters say out loud. Will also 10/10 respond to them.

He’s so excited at little things “look akamaru! It’s a stick!” “Oh shit! Wow! It’s a fishy!”

Or when the seasons change he is so hyped

Hates Tom Nook (greedy capitalist) and also hates Eugene

Starts calling people by nicknames from animal crossing. “Sure, Bunyip!” “Sure thing daddio!” And only the other ninja who play Animal Crossing will get it

Everyone else will be like: (;-;) shut the fuck up dog boy did you just call me “daddio?”

His title on his animal crossing passport is “photogenic animal” I felt the need to include this information

Sometimes I don’t even know what the fuck Kiba does on animal crossing like he just messes around all the time

I think he’ll like fishing a lot tho

Despises the snooty or cranky villagers like he wants to pop one at them through the screen

Having interactions w friends on Animal Crossing can either be fun and friendly or super passive aggressive

Him and Shinos interactions are so ducking passive aggressive like Shino is hitting Kiba with his bug net and Kibas like ?? And Shino will just be like “there was a bug on you” like bruh

Him and Chojis interactions are friendly at first until he realizes how much better Choji is doing than him and he gets so aggressive so Chojis like: aight imma head out

Refuses to let Rock Lee get into his island and it makes Lee so ducking mad bc he wants to flex on him, but Kibas ego will be so damaged so he refuses

Anyway, his house is literally what a 12 year old boys house would look like. Like there’s clutter everywhere the only clear path is the one to his bed

Also whenever he uses the vaulting pole thing he pisses himself like he thinks it’s so fucking funny

I’m sorry but Kibas character will look like a rat like it will look so ugly

I feel like he has like one braincell when he plays this game

Shino Aburame

He’s so secretive about it at first, like this is Shino Aburame, he’s supposed to be this cool mysterious guy

So he will not let anyone know about it, until kiba accidentally finds out

Like they’re on a mission and they’re in their tent sleeping. Once Shino thinks everyone’s asleep he whips out the Switch and starts playing. Then Kiba rolls over to face him and is like “I KNEW IT”

Then Kiba tells everyone else

They’re Animal Crossing rivals now

He’s got a Southern Hemisphere island and he strategically picks his island in a way that he’ll (in real life terms) be able to have access to bugs... but it’s a game, no point in explaining it to him tbh

Like he only strategizes on the game for bugs. Probably talks to himself whenever bugs are involved in it

He doesn’t read the captions out loud, he’ll read them in his head like normal person

Names his Island after a bug species or “Bug Landia”, “Bikochu Island” <- as tribute to those filler episodes lmfao

Starts talking like K.K. (The dog w the stupid ducking guitar) and tbh it fits his personality pretty well, minus some of the hippie energy, but still.. sometimes Hinata and Kiba look at eachother like: is he good?

Will talk like K.K. When fighting enemies and sometimes they’ll stop and be like “did you just quote fucking K.K?” Sometimes it pisses enemies off even more

Also hates Tom Nook, Kiba and him will put their rivalry aside sometimes just so they could gang up on him

Like they’ll just yell insults at him through the screen and think they rlly did something amazing

His fav activity is obviously bug catching!! He gets so hyped when he catches a bug.

If he’s playing the game outside and you can’t rlly see his face bc of his outfit, it will look like he’s spazzing, but in reality he’s bursting with joy bc he caught an uncommon bug

Likes the cranky villagers.. idk why he just gets a kick out of them

His little house thing is bug and tropical themed, he lowkey should be an interior designer

Shinos character will resemble a bug. Don’t know how, but it will.

Choji Akamichi

Loves animal crossing almost as much as he loves food, it’s a close second

He will talk about Animal crossing with anyone, like he thinks everyone is dying to know about his island

One day Sai made eye contact with him for like 2 seconds Chojis dragging him over to his Switch like “oh hey Sai! I seen you looking at me and I figured you must be wondering what I was doing. So I’ll save you the time and just show you instead.” Sais just there like: wtf?

He’s neutral on the capitalist pig that is Tom Nook, Infact, he thinks he’s kind of nice. Poor Choji, so naive.

His island is in the Northern Hemisphere and he doesn’t really strategize it too much bc he doesn’t take the game as seriously as the rest of them like they’re really out here with survival tactics? My G..

Like he doesn’t take it as seriously as Neji and Lee, but he still is doing better than all of them in the game

Anyways, he’ll name the island after his favourite chip brand / chip flavour

Lives for interacting with the other islanders!! Loves Lily and Pashmina bc they’re so nice.

The sisterly and peppy villagers are his favourite

Favourite thing to do is collect fruits and get cool foods. Aside from that, I would go with bug catching as a close second.

Hosts everyone who plays animal crossing for the coolest funking hangouts poor Neji has to sit there and pretend he doesn’t play

Like he is so creative about it to and he’ll think up games like playing musical chairs or hide and seek that they can all play together

Probably results in Lee and Kiba getting into a fist fight irl and accusing eachother of cheating

His house has butterfly themed stuff in there as well as cool food things

Tenten is the only one who doesn’t get pissed tf off when she sees how fly his island is, like she’s jealous, but she isn’t like Kiba and Lee

Chojis character will look so adorable like idc his is the cutest one out of everyone’s

Neji Hyuuga

He first sees TenTen and Lee playing it and he acts like he doesn’t like it, but there are fireworks going off inside his head, like the game looks so fire

So he buys it secretly and he is obsessed, he will deny he plays it if anyone asks though

He wants his islands name to be something thought out, like it takes him 5 days just to name his island.. Only for him to settle on some shit like “Leaf Island” he wanted to name it Byakugan Land but his pride wouldn’t let him

Definitely respects Tom Nook. Like Rock Lee and him both treat the game like a survival tactic so he respects Tom Nook as a superior, even if he has some greed problems. He’s still a superior and he must be adressed with respect >:0

Will get worked up when he overhears Shino and Kiba trash talking Nook and it takes every bone in his body not to knock them out, but he doesn’t want them to know he plays so he refrains

I’m not gonna lie he tries to use his Byakugan when he’s fishing in animal crossing so he can see what type of fish it is through the water and it pisses him the fuck off when it doesn’t work

Like he’s just playing Animal Crossing at like 3 am and you hear him whisper shout “Byakugan!” And then he punches the air bc it doesn’t work

He changes his passport title to “Nook Inc’s Island Dweller”

Nejis favourite thing to do on animal crossing is probably fishing tbh. Like yes it does aggravate the absolute fuck out of him sometimes when he keeps catching the same worthless fish over and over again, but he enjoys the rush of it

His house is all white, like only white furniture idk why

No group interactions, only w Hinata who he made swear she wouldn’t tell anyone he plays

Def critiques her Island and in her head she’s like :0 bruh I’m ur only Animal Crossing friend and youre gonna critique my fucking island nah bitch not w your ghetto ass all white stinky looking cottage

I love Neji I’m sorry but this shit is too funny for me

Neji wants his character to look as much like him as possible, but can’t find the right hairstyle

His drip is fire tho like his outfit is so nice even if it’s all white as well

Rock Lee

Kiba and Shino might be rivals, but they both equally despise Rock Lee on Animal Crossing

Treats it like real life.

For example: since him and TenTen are friends he’s like “me and Tentens islands are Allies”

Has declared war on Kiba and Shino so many times and they’re like?? Dude you can’t even start a war like wtf

He is so competitive though LMFAOO AND HE MAKES HIS CHARACTER WORK OUT. Like he makes him run laps every morning and it doesn’t even benefit him in the game at all... anyways

His island is in the northern hemisphere for sure and it’s named “Power of Youth” or something involving the word Youth

Uses his Nook phone to take pics will all the islanders he stumbles upon

“Good evening, Lily! Let’s take a picture together, the sun is shining in a way that perfectly accentuates your features!”

He also talks to islanders out loud and reads their captions in designated voices for them, it annoys the shit out of Neji

Jazzes the shit out of his Passport like his title is “horizon bound patron” and his little passport comment is “THE POWER OF YOUTH!”

Takes the Nook miles quests so seriously. “I will complete three quests today.” Thinks of them as missions and so he gives them the same energy

Probably calls Nook “Nook-Sensei”

“right away Nook-Sensei” or “you can count on me Nook-sensei!” Whenever Nook asks him something

Rock Lees fav activity is literally just completing whatever a character asks him to do. Like constantly does quests and enjoys it. Wtf

If there is workout furniture on animal crossing, best believe it’s in Rock Lees house

He gets so pissy when Kiba won’t let him on his Island

Invites everyone to his island and forces them onto a tour of it.

Also his character looks so fucking similar to himself that it’s eerie

Kiba will make fun of him for it (Shino will probably join in too)

#animal crosing new horizons #animal crossing #anime #naruto headcanons #naruto shippuden #naruto x reader #kiba inuzuka #neji hyuuga #choji akimichi #rock lee #shino aburame

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godzillasrighttoe · 3 years

Text

Anguirus's surprise birthday party

Damn that title is kinda bland ngl

(Since Anguirus's birthday is today, I decided that I would make this without planning how I'm gonna write it just before it's irrelevant. Also, all the kaiju in here are supposed to be the kaiju from Final Wars, not their other appearances in the Showa era. Also, since I ship Orga and Megaguirus I decided that this year they're gonna be having a baby lol. And this also takes place in the gijinka universe)

Final Wars Goji:Ok guys, so here's the plan. I will pick up Anguirus from his home so that we can hang out for the day and while we're doing so and so you guys break into my house and start decorating. I'll leave the key under the door for you guys to unlock it.

Orga:bruh we don't even got decorations yet

Final Wars Goji:𝙩 𝙝 𝙚 𝙣 𝙗 𝙪 𝙮 𝙩 𝙝 𝙚 𝙢 𝙨 𝙝 𝙞 𝙩 𝙨

Orga:Are we even gonna have time to buy them?

Final Wars Goji:

Final Wars Goji:𝗮𝗿𝗲 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝗳𝘂𝗰𝗸𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝘀𝘁𝘂𝗽𝗶𝗱

Millennium Goji:I feel like we shouldn't be insulting each other and we should actually be planning this out. How about we assign who's gonna do what for the party?Such as decorating, baking the cake, shit like that.

Kumonga:Ooh!I can shoot webs as decoration!

Final Wars Goji:𝗱𝗼𝗻'𝘁 𝗻 𝗼 𝗯 𝗼 𝗱 𝘆 𝘄𝗮𝗻𝘁 𝘁𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝘀𝗵𝗶𝘁 𝗮𝗹𝗹 𝘂𝗽 𝗶𝗻 𝗺𝘆 𝗵𝗼𝘂𝘀𝗲

Millennium Goji:Yeah, this isn't a Halloween party, dude.

Gigan:Ay, Final Wars, how would you feel if I shot lasers into your walls and wrote "Happy Birthday" out of it as decoration?

Final Wars Goji:

Monster X:Oh!And then I can add "Anguirus" to it!

Final Wars Goji:𝙒𝙃𝙔 𝘿𝙊 𝙔'𝘼𝙇𝙇 𝙒𝘼𝙉𝙉𝘼 𝘿𝙊 𝙏𝙃𝙄𝙎 𝙏𝙊 𝙈𝙔 𝙃𝙊𝙐𝙎𝙀-

Monster X:𝘄𝗲 𝗻𝗲𝘃𝗲𝗿 𝗹𝗶𝗸𝗲𝗱 𝘆𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝘂𝗴𝗹𝘆 𝗮𝘀𝘀 𝗮𝗻𝘆𝘄𝗮𝘆

Kiryu:How about when Anguirus walks in we say happy birthday and then start playing a bass boosted version of The Anguirus Song?

Orga:That's a good idea, but how about not bass boosted?Matter of fact, why did you even say that?

Kiryu:I don't know, I thought it would be funny. In my head.

Orga:𝗱𝗮𝘄𝗴 𝘆𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝘀𝗲𝗻𝘀𝗲 𝗼𝗳 𝗵𝘂𝗺𝗼𝗿 𝗶𝘀 𝗯𝗿𝗼𝗸𝗲𝗻

King Caesar:𝙃𝙄𝙎 𝙎𝙀𝙉𝙎𝙀 𝙊𝙁 𝙃𝙐𝙈𝙊𝙍 𝙄𝙎 𝙊𝙉 𝙏𝙃𝘼𝙏 𝙉 𝙐 𝙏 𝙎 𝙃 𝙄 𝙏

Kiryu:𝗕𝗜-

Millennium Goji:Alright, that's ENOUGH!How about we just buy stuff we need and come back in the morning?

Mothra Imago:I'll get cake ingredients!

Orga:𝗳𝗮𝘁𝗮𝘀𝘀

Mothra Imago:

Kiryu:Tbh, you shouldn't be talking because first off, Mothra isn't even fat and second, 𝗻𝗴𝗹 𝗠𝗲𝗴𝗮𝗴𝘂𝗶𝗿𝘂𝘀 𝗸𝗶𝗻𝗱𝗮 𝗯𝗲𝗲𝗻 𝗴𝗮𝗶𝗻𝗶𝗻 𝘁𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝘄𝗲𝗶𝗴𝗵𝘁 𝗲𝘃𝗲𝗿 𝘀𝗶𝗻𝗰𝗲 𝘀𝗵𝗲 𝗳𝗼𝘂𝗻𝗱 𝗼𝘂𝘁 𝘀𝗵𝗲 𝘄𝗮𝘀 𝗽𝗿𝗲𝗴𝗻𝗮𝗻𝘁😳

Orga:

Kiryu:

Everyone else in the room:

Orga:𝗔𝗿𝗲 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝗳𝘂𝗰𝗸𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝘀𝘁𝘂𝗽𝗶𝗱

Kiryu:I mean, not gonna cap, she's been eating just a bit too much for a pregnant woman. Fuck cravings and shit, that's not normal. Sometimes I think that she's trying to kill the baby.

Orga:𝗯𝗿𝗼-

Millennium Goji:ANYWAY, all of you can now LEAVE now and go get stuff for the party tomorrow. Especially you, Kiryu. You're a dumbass. I hate to defend Orga in this situation, but it's true.

Kiryu:

Kiryu:Ok...

(Next day lol)

Millennium Goji:Ok guys, what do you all have to offer so that we can start decorating-

Orga:You always talkin' bout we. 🄸 🄰🄸🄽'🅃 🄽🄴🅅🄴🅁 🄵🅄🄲🄺 🅆🄸🅃 🄽🄸🄽🅃🄴🄽🄳🄾.

Millennium Goji:

Millennium Goji:And when did I ask?𝗠 𝗮 𝗻 𝗹 𝗮 𝗶 𝗱 𝗼 𝘂 𝘁 𝗮 𝘄 𝗵 𝗼 𝗹 𝗲 𝗽 𝗮 𝗿 𝗮 𝗴 𝗿 𝗮 𝗽 𝗵

Orga:that was like 2 sentences tf-

Rodan:Ay, you wanted me to show what I bought, right?

Millennium Goji:

Millennium Goji:Yeah?

Rodan:I bought wrapping paper so that we can wrap the presents we all bought Anguirus!

Millennium Goji:That's all?

Gigan:Bold of you to assume we bought him anything.

Orga:Why is everybody talking about we?!?Once again, 🄸 🄰🄸🄽'🅃 🄽🄴🅅🄴🅁 🄵🅄🄲🄺 🅆🄸🅃-

Gigan:𝗡𝗼𝗯𝗼𝗱𝘆 𝗰𝗮𝗿𝗲𝘀, 𝗢𝗿𝗴𝗮. 𝗦𝗼 𝗶𝗺𝗺𝗮 𝗻𝗲𝗲𝗱 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝘁𝗼 𝘀𝗵𝘂𝘁 𝘁𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝗕 𝗨 𝗟 𝗟 𝗦 𝗛 𝗜 𝗧 𝘂𝗽, 𝗰𝗵𝗶𝗲𝗳.

Orga:

Orga:ok

Millennium Goji:Gigan, did you buy anything?

Gigan:no I'm broke

Gigan:jk I didn't wanna buy anything lol

Millennium Goji:𝗕 𝗶 𝘁 𝗰 𝗵 .

Kiryu:I bought the happy birthday decoration.

Millennium:Oh, ok. So did I though...

Kiryu:

Millennium Goji:

Kiryu:So what we bout to do?

Orga:STOP TALKING ABOUT WE!!!🇮 🇦 🇮 🇳 ' 🇹 🇳 🇪 🇻 🇪 🇷 🇫 🇺 🇨 🇰 🇼 🇮 🇹 🇳 🇮 🇳 🇹 🇪 🇳 🇩 🇴

Everyone else in the room:SHUT UP!!!

(Meanwhile with Final Wars Goji)

*Final Wars Goji knocks on Anguirus's door*

*No answer*

Final Wars Goji:Anwser that door, man!Come on!

*Anguirus opens the door*

Anguirus:Godzilla!

Final Wars Goji:Anguirus!

*They hug*

Final Wars Goji:Happy Birthday, man!

Anguirus:Awww, thanks!I actually can't believe that I'm 25 now!

Final Wars Goji:I know, right?You're so old now!

Anguirus:Not really though. Because aren't you like 30?

Final Wars Goji:27.

Anguirus:Old enough. Hahaha!

Final Wars Goji:hahaha 𝘄𝗵𝗲𝗿𝗲 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗳𝘂𝗻𝗻𝘆 hahaha

Anguirus:Huh?

Anguirus:

Final Wars Goji:

Anguirus:Dude, you LITERALLY old shamed me so when I do it back you say it's not funny.

Final Wars Goji:Anguirus, this is weird. Here's your birthday card.

Anguirus:Oh, thanks!Wanna hang out now?

Final Wars Goji:Sure!Heh...

(Back to the party setup)

Millennium Goji:Ok guys!What all have you gotten set up?

Rodan:I've hung up some decorations!

Baragon:I've wrapped some of his presents!

Kamacuras:I'm making beans!

Millennium Goji:The fuck?Why?

Kamacuras:Anguirus likes them.

Ebirah:𝘀𝗵𝗲 𝗺𝗮𝗱𝗲 𝗕𝗘𝗘𝗘𝗘𝗘𝗘𝗔𝗡𝗦 𝘄𝘁𝗳

Millennium Goji:Has anybody else done anything?

Mothra Imago:Me and the boys are about to bake the cake!

Gigan:Don't ever sat that shit again.

Mothra Imago:I- I'm not even trying to be funny.... it's literally me and the boys...

Gigan:I don't care, shut up.

Mothra Imago:Rude!

Gigan:How?𝗴𝗼𝗱𝗱𝗮𝗺𝗻 𝘀𝗡𝗼𝗪𝗳𝗟𝗮𝗞𝗲

Kiryu:imagine if we sliced up gigan's dick and put it on the cake as a decoration for being volatile

Gigan:

Mothra Imago:

Orga:

Millennium Goji:

Kiryu:What?

Millennium Goji:*sighs* Ghost Goji is taking over again, huh?

Kiryu:*sighs*Yeah... when I said that it felt like 𝗜 𝗹𝗲𝗳𝘁 𝗺𝘆 𝗰𝗼𝗻𝘀𝗰𝗶𝗼𝘂𝘀𝗻𝗲𝘀𝘀 𝗜𝗡 𝗧𝗛𝗘 𝗦𝗜𝗫𝗧𝗛 𝗗𝗜𝗠𝗘𝗡𝗦𝗜𝗢𝗡~

Kiryu and Gigan:𝙇𝙀𝙁𝙏 𝙈𝙔 𝙎𝙊𝙐𝙇 𝙄𝙉 𝙃𝙄𝙎 𝙑𝙄𝙎𝙄𝙊𝙉 𝙇𝙀𝙏'𝙎 𝙂𝙊 𝙂𝙀𝙏 𝙄𝙏 𝘼𝙃 𝘼𝙃 𝙇𝙀𝙏'𝙎 𝙂𝙊 𝙂𝙀𝙏 𝙄𝙏 𝘼𝙃 𝘼𝙃

Orga:𝗱𝗮𝗺𝗻𝗻𝗻𝗻𝗻 𝘆'𝗮𝗹𝗹 𝗮𝗿𝗲 𝗴𝗮𝘆𝘆𝘆𝘆𝘆

Mothra Imago:And is there anything wrong with that?!?Like-

Orga:𝗳𝘂𝗰𝗸 𝗼𝘂𝘁 𝗺𝘆 𝗳𝗮𝗰𝗲 𝗹𝗶𝗯𝗲𝗿𝗮𝗹

Mothra Imago:HEY!!!Why is everyone so mean to me today?!?

Kiryu:I'm not!I'd never be mean to you!

Orga:simp

Gigan:Who the fuck still says "simp" anymore?The word is kinda dead...

Kiryu:Hey, I have a joke relating to the word "simp".

Gigan:Hm?

Kiryu:Take the "s" and "m" out of it and add it to Orga's name.

Gigan:Huh?O-

Orga:I don't understand- bruh.

*Millennium Goji laughs*

Mothra Imago:What's the joke?

Kiryu:Orgasm.

Mothra Imago:Inappropiate!

Millennium Goji:Then don't listen. It's that easy. Plus we're all adults.

Kiryu:Well, I'm 17. I'll be 18 next month.

Mothra Imago:Then why are you making these jokes?!?

Kiryu:Because I'm almost an adult?

Gigan:bruh are we gonna start baking orrr

Orga:Yep!

*Orga dumps all of the ingredients onto the baking table*

Gigan:ORGA!!!WHAT THE HELL!!!

Orga:?

Kiryu:𝙒𝙃𝘼𝙏 𝙏𝙃𝙀 𝙁𝙐𝘾𝙆, 𝙍𝙄𝘾𝙃𝘼𝙍𝘿?

Orga:Why is are you two against me all of a sudden?

Gigan:THE EGGS WERE IN THERE!!!YOU DUMBASS!!!

Orga:ohhhhh

Orga:𝗜 𝗴𝘂𝗲𝘀𝘀 𝘄𝗲 𝗵𝗮𝘃𝗶𝗻 𝘃𝗲𝗴𝗮𝗻 𝗰𝗮𝗸𝗲 𝘁𝗵𝗲𝗻.

Millennium Goji:No!!!We can't make it VEGAN!!!Anguirus HATES vegans and their food!!!

Orga:The fuck?Why?

Millennium Goji:It has something to do with his mother who isn't approving of his sexuality, apparently.

Orga:bruh we got like 2 hours left before Final Wars comes back the cake is gonna be vegan

Millennium Goji:2 HOURS?!?HOW?!?

Gigan:And you're acting like it's the end of the world.

Kiryu:bruh we don't even know if the eggs are broken or not

Gigan:They are!All of them!Don't you see it dripping out of the bag?

*Kiryu looks at the bag*

Kiryu:oh shit lol

Gigan:Now what?!?

Orga:WE MAKE THE VEGAN CAKE!!!

Gigan:NO!!!

(Meanwhile with Final Wars Goji and Anguirus)

Anguirus:I can't believe you would spend your whole day with me on my birthday!

Final Wars Goji:Yeah... mainly because I wanna spend more time with you anyway.

Anguirus:Oh, really?

Final Wars Goji:Yeah... for the rest of my life.

Anguirus:Oh, I'd be looking forward to doing that also... heh...

*Silence*

Final Wars Goji in his mind:𝗜 𝘄𝗮𝗻𝗻𝗮 𝗺𝗮𝗸𝗲 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝗺𝗶𝗻𝗲, 𝗯𝘂𝘁 𝘁𝗵𝗮𝘁'𝘀 𝗵𝗮𝗿𝗱 𝘁𝗼 𝘀𝗮𝘆...

Final Wars Goji:Is this coming off in a cheesy way?

Anguirus:

Anguirus:I love everything you do. When you call me fuckin' dumb for the stupid shit I do. Wanna ride my bike with you. Fully undressed, no trainin' wheels left for youuuuuuuu!~ I'll pull them off for youuuuuuuu!Hey, I love that song!

Final Wars Goji:Oh, you do?

Anguirus:Yeah!

Final Wars Goji:Oh, so do I. Imagine if that was our theme song if we were in love.

Anguirus:I mean... it could be...

*More silence*

Anguirus:What, are you trying to say something?

Final Wars Goji:Uh-*blushes*

*Final Wars Goji remembers about the party*

Final Wars Goji:Hey, there's something I wanna show you. At my house. It's another gift.

Anguirus:Ooh!I can't wait!Take me to your house!

Final Wars Goji:Ok, by the way you get distracted SOOOOO easily.

Anguirus:Oh, so there's no gift?

Final Wars Goji:There is, I wouldn't just give you a birthday card. I was just pointing that out. We can go to my house now.

Anguirus:Ok!

(Back at Final Wars Goji's house)

*Mothra Imago, Gigan, Kiryu, and Orga are playing Uno while everyone else is making sure everything looks right*

*Orga puts down his second to last card*

Orga:Hah!Uno!

Kiryu:DAMNIT!

*Kiryu bangs the table*

Orga:Hoes mad.

Kiryu:I'M NOT A HOE!Does anybody have a card to make him draw???

Gigan, who's before Orga, and has a +4 in his deck:*laughs to himself*HAHAHAHAHAHA 𝗻𝗼.

Mothra Imago:*sighs*Oh well... I guess you win Orga.

Orga:Hahaha!

*Mothra puts down a card*

*Kiryu puts down a card in disappointment*

Orga:Gigan, are you gonna put a card down?

*Gigan laughs*

Orga:Why are you laughing?Wait...

Gigan:HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

Orga:GIGAN PLEASE!!!HAVE MERCY!!!

Gigan:𝙏𝙃𝙀𝙍𝙀 𝙄𝙎 𝙉𝙊 𝙈𝙀𝙍𝘾𝙔

*Gigan puts down his +4*

Orga:*high pitch screaming*

*Millennium Goji comes rushing over*

Millennium Goji:GUYS!!!Final Wars is on his way back!!!He's almost here!!!

Gigan:But our Uno game!-

Millennium Goji:𝙄 𝘿𝙊𝙉'𝙏 𝙂𝙄𝙑𝙀 𝘼 𝙁𝙐𝘾𝙆. Start tidying up before it's lights out!!!Is the cake ready?

Mothra Imago:Yep!Already decorated, too.

Orga:𝘆𝗲𝗮𝗵 𝘁𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝘃 𝗲 𝗴 𝗮 𝗻 𝘀 𝗵 𝗶 𝘁 𝗶𝘀 𝗿𝗲𝗮𝗱𝘆

Kiryu:Well, it's not vegan. Remember how we still used the crushed up eggs and took out all of the egg shells but when we did Gigan picked some of it up and dumped it all on my head for no reason so I said "More daddy!~" so that he would stop?

Orga:oh yeah lol

Millennium Goji:𝗟𝗜𝗚𝗛𝗧𝗦 𝗢 𝗨 𝗧

*Millennium Goji turns off the lights*

*Kiryu screams*

*Millennium Goji turns the lights back on*

Millennium Goji:Kiryu, are you ok?

Kiryu:What are you talking about?That was Gigan.

Gigan:𝗕𝗶𝘁𝗰𝗵, 𝘄𝗵𝗮𝘁?

Kiryu:Don't even play, Gigan.

Gigan:Ok...

Millennium Goji:Um...anyway.

*Millennium Goji turns the lights off again*

*Gigan moans*

*Millennium Goji turns the lights back on*

Millennium Goji:DUDE-

Gigan:THAT WAS KIRYU!!!

Millennium Goji:NO IT WASN'T!!!If another one of you makes another sound when I turn the lights 𝗜'𝗺 𝗴𝗼𝗻𝗻𝗮 𝗺𝗮𝗸𝗲 𝗪𝗪𝗜𝗜 𝗹𝗼𝗼𝗸 𝗹𝗶𝗸𝗲 𝗮 𝗰𝗮𝗿 𝗮𝗰𝗰𝗶𝗱𝗲𝗻𝘁.

*Millennium Goji turns off the lights again*

Gigan:*impersonates Doja Cat*ᗪᗩᗰᑎ ᑭᗩᑭᗩ YOᑌ ᗩ ᖇᗩᖇᗴ ᗷᖇᗴᗴᗪ-

*Millennium Goji turns the lights on again*

Millennium Goji:THAT'S IT-

*Millennium Goji kicks Gigan

Gigan:OW!!!

Kiryu:ᵈᴀᵐɴ ᵖᴀᵖᴀ ʸᴏᵘ ᴀ ˢᴄᵃʀʸ-

(Meanwhile outside)

*Final Wars Goji is covering Anguirus's eyes with his hands*

Anguirus:Lmao why do my eyes have to be covered if we're going in your house?Is it something that I can see through the window?

Final Wars Goji:It's special.

Anguirus:Ok, whatever you say...

*They reach his house and Final Wars Goji unlocks the door*

Final Wars Goji:Open your eyes!

*Anguirus opens them*

*Millennium Goji turns on the lights*

Everyone except for Gigan:SURPRISE!!!

Gigan:*blows a party horn*

Anguirus:WOW!I was not expecting this!!!Thank you so much guys!

Final Wars Goji:And it was all planned by me!

Anguirus:Awww, thanks Final!Can I get to my cake now?

Millennium Goji:Sure!Do you wanna cut it first-

Anguirus:There is no future. There is no past. Do you see?Time is simultaneous, an intricately structured jewel that humans insist on viewing one edge at a time when the whole design is visible in every facet.

Everyone else in the room:

Millennium Goji:All I asked was if you wanted to cut your birthday cake first.

#((found on an incorrect quote generator lol))#happy birthday anguirus!!!#anguirus #kaiju #incorrect godzilla quotes #sources #wait a minute by willow #training wheels by melanie martinez #and baku

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