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#I am still in awe of these works I did ages ago
kagooleo · 1 year
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in 2021 I participated in the making of ‘shuwatch!! the ultraman fan zine’ for volume 2! I was able to draw a piece for one of my favorite series and a postcard set :D
it was awesome seeing so many works all going towards a good cause! I had a blast with these pieces and was an amazing learning experience to experiment with new mediums and techniques!!
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ms-fade · 9 months
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Reaction to making you cum/Fingering for the first time hc’s: My hero academia men.
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Mha characters x Fem!reader +18 drabble.
Characters: Izuku Midoriya, Katsuki Bakugo, Shoto Todoroki, Eijiro Kirishima
This is just for fun because I can’t stop thinking of a certain character’s reaction and decided to do more!
They are all ages up to +18.
Warnings: Fingering, dom/sub, sub!reader, teasing, slight degradation, male’s characters first time, crying, overstimulation, teaching, males having no clue, no really canon but also a bit, mentation of taking pictures.
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Izuku Midoriya/Deku
This boy was always itching to get his hands on you because even if he has a pure heart, he’s still man. I think he’d think about it so much that when it finally happens he realizes he has no clue what to do.
So when you’re kissing and he has you onto of him the only thing he does is grab your waist and get hard underneath you. So when you both decided to go there you guide him and tell him what to do.
But when he gets the hang of it he might get a little cocky at how you gasp when he pushes all the way in. He just really enjoys your moans and the look on your face. He is a slut for giving pleasure.
When you grabbed ahold of the his shirt and rocked your hips to get more, he could feel you gripping onto his fingers and knew you were close. “I’m doing that good? You stop guiding me a while ago, guess I learn quickly.” He’d kiss your shoulders and work his way up to your neck.
When you finally do come it’s all over for him. He stares at you with awe in his eyes from knowing he did that to you, he made you cum. He’s so proud of himself but he can’t keep his eyes away from you.
“You looked so pretty when you cum.” He’d nudged his face into your neck and pull his fingers out getting a whine from you. “You think you can give me another?”
Yes, he wants to do it again. Deku really enjoys fingering you and watching you moan just for him. Think about it, his thick fingers that hold such power- Who wouldn’t cum?
He would moan with you because it makes me feel just as high, might even cum in his underwear or get close.
He also licks his fingers clean each time and always make you cum twice, I don’t make the rules. I think he’s the king of fingering.
Katsuki Bakugo
Man thinks he knows how to do it but he really doesn’t, but bare with me. He would always want to make you bend at his will and make you his. So when the opportunity comes he jumps into it.
Here’s why I say he doesn’t know how to: He’s to rough and tho that’s good for some people, he has no skill and it actually really hurts. Boys like “I’m doing so good.” Until you pull away from him and ask him to stop.
He gets defensives, “What do you mean I’m doing it wrong.” You explain to him that he isn’t doing it right, so you take his hand and guide him through it. How exactly you like and if you like it rough you teach him how to do it right.
Does get good because he takes notice of everything about how it makes you feel. So it doesn’t take him long to have you actually a moaning mess underneath him, because he’s also a quick learner.
“Look at this pretty little hole, so wet for me. Am I doing it right now?” His smirk was as wide and cocky just like he was at the beginning. You didn’t answer him so he grabbed your cheeks and pulled you up and close to his face. “You guided me on how to finger you but you’re embarrassed now?”
He’d laugh as he felt you clinch and added a finger inside to make you more full. Soon he watched your eyes roll back and your stomach shake with your pussy clamping around him. He could feel the cum leak onto his fingers but he couldn’t stop looking at you.
Bakugo couldn’t be more smug then this moment because he made you cum for the first time. You moaned for him, you did everything because of him. “That was so fucking hot.” Licking his lips he pulled out his fingers and licked one of them clean, claiming you tasted delicious.
“Open wide and taste yourself.”
Eijiro Kirishima
Let me tell you something, he has googled it to prepare for you. He has been waiting to pleasure you for a long time and he knows that it’s different then porn so he wants to know. Deku was to embarrassed, and bakugou didn’t think he needed it. But this man? He of course wants to please you so much.
So when things get more heated for the first time he wants to keep it simple. His cock was so hard just by feeling and kissing you but he couldn’t get the thought of actually getting to feel that pussy. So he asks if he can try it and you say yes obv.
So, he knows at little more then the others but still wants your guide since he read that each girl is different. But he will finger you softly until you tell him to go faster. He curls his fingers the way you want, and listens to your words.
He couldn’t believe how warm and amazing you felt that he got more feisty with it the more he sees you moaning. He would kiss all over your neck and work his hands while he listens to your body. Each breath and moan, each twitch or squeeze you give him.
“You like that baby?” He voice sweet but teasing. Kiri was watching you bounce against him with closed eyes and mouth open. “How could you get more beautiful? Fuck- You look so hot.” He couldn’t get enough of how you looked.
When he noticed you were close it was bliss and he egged you on, even pumping his fingers in faster to make you cum harder. He was moaning and breathless just watching you. “Cum. Cum for me pretty girl.” He was demanding you cum for him.
Kiri stared wide eyes when you finally cummed and almost didn’t stop because he was loving the feeling of your pussy. You had to cry for him to stop sinces it felt so good but it was to much. So when he stopped he kissed you and told you how well you did.
“You’re just perfect.” You blushed at his sweetness. “But, I think I want to make you cry more.”
Shoto Todoroki
The least knowing for sure, idk what you say. He’s never really watched porn, or had a high sex drive until he grew older and met you. Having someone so close to him and beautiful made his horny side come out, so he didn’t have a clue of what to do.
But he was a good kisser and he knew basic things and let his heart tell him what to do. So when it came to more sexual things he asked you. “Can you teach me how to please you?” Just straight up asked you. He had no shame because he wanted to touch you so bad.
He was so slow and careful at first because he didn’t want to do anything wrong. He asked so many times if it was okay, please appreciate him. When he slipped his first finger in he was gone. His head went fuzzy at the moan you let out and how your pussy felt.
You guide him through everything from how he rubbed your clit and how to move his fingers, what felt good and didn’t. He took it slow because he wanted to savor the sweet noises you let out. I imagine him just watching you with lusty eyes at everything you did.
It wasn’t until you told him to pick up the pass and pushed down on his fingers that he lost his composure. Shoto loves the juices flowing down your pussy and onto his fingers and your thighs. His pace would pick up quickly and more then you could handle.
“I have never felt anything like this, my love. Have you ever seen yourself like this? It’s truly a work of art.” He couldn’t help but smirk softly at your face. “You’re taking my finger so well, practically sucking me in.” He’d chuckle.
When he noticed you were close he would focus on your face and how it scrunched up in pleasure. “Please cum for me.” His fingers curled like you had taught him and pushed them in farther and deeper. When you came it leaked down because he didn’t stop until it was overflowing.
He’s one to be memorized by how you cum. To your face and then to your cum itself. “Such a pretty face when you cum, almost makes me want to take a picture.” He’d smirk and lick his fingers clean and made sure you watched.
I think he can’t stop thinking of making you cum after that- Man is a slut for your cumming face. (He definitely has pics)
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billybob598 · 4 months
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Were You Gay-Panicking? (Kyra Cooney-Cross x Reader)
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IM BACKKKKK!!! Here's my bi-monthly fic :) I'm actually kinda proud of this one, felt like some good writing. Anyhoo enjoy bitches! As always, any feedback good or bad is welcomed! PEACE
Summary: (first time doing one of these) A few months ago, Kyra had no idea who you were. Now? Now, she was gay panicking everytime she was in the same room as you.
Word Count: 4.6K (WTF?!?!?!?!?!)
Kyra didn’t exactly know how to feel about you. Sure, you were Aussie. Sure, you were an amazing fullback who could run forever and never seem winded. Sure, you were quite possibly the sweetest person ever. Sure, you were stunningly beautiful. Kyra paused, her eyes locked onto you as you laughed that adorable laugh at something Katie had said. Okay, the thing about you being beautiful kind of slipped out. It’s not like it’s not true though. You did have this just natural beauty to you, you barely wore makeup, but you still shone in Kyra’s eyes.
 It was crazy that the two of you had never met before. You were roughly the same age, both Australian and now both Gunners. Unlike Kyra, you’re career up until this point had been riddled with injuries and unfortunate coincidences. Despite being an integral part of the Arsenal squad and having a breakout year last season, you were still not chosen for the World Cup, or any national team camps for that matter. Kyra had heard plenty about you from Steph and Caitlin, she had also seen you a bit on a few of the other Arsenal players' socials. You did have an Instagram account, but you rarely posted. Any true Arsenal fan knew who you were, but casual fans and Matildas’ fans probably hadn’t heard of you. You preferred to work in the background, you weren’t a big extrovert and your personality was more closed off so, consequently you weren’t insanely popular with the fans. So, when Kyra officially met you she had no idea how you weren’t the most liked player.
4 months ago
After finishing some of the required videos and finally signing her contract for The Arsenal, Kyra found herself wandering around the grounds. She had a few minutes until she was supposed to be at a press conference introducing all of the new signings, so she figured she could start exploring London Colney a bit more. As she passes through the locker room she hears some noise coming from the pitch. The distinctive sound of a boot colliding with a ball lures the Australian outside. The scent of fresh-cut grass and marking paint rushes into Kyra’s nose, bringing a soft smile to her face. Another ball gets kicked on the other side of the field. Turning her head, the midfielder is met with the sight of the prettiest woman she’s ever laid eyes on. She watched in awe at how your muscles flexed each time you struck the ball, her breath catching in her throat when you turn around. Your beautifully Y/E/C eyes glimmering, the sun hitting them just right. 
“Oh, sorry. I thought the field was open.” You mutter quietly, your face heating up slightly. 
“Uhm, it’s alright. I’m not here to play or anything. I mean-uh, well actually I am here to play, but not right now. At least I don’t think rig-” Kyra stumbles through her sentences until your giggle cuts her off. She blushes at the sound.
“No, I get what you mean,” you both stand there awkwardly, shifting your weight from foot to foot nervously, “Well, I should probably get going.”
“Wait! Uhh, I mean you sound Australian, you are right?” Kyra asks, desperate to keep the conversation going.
“Yeah, yeah I am. I’m from Geraldton, you?” Your voice is quiet, but Kyra is already in love with it. 
“Herston, have you ever been?” 
“Yeah, I mean I’ve been to Brisbane, it’s nice.” The conversation comes to a awkward lull, Kyra can see how nervous you are. 
“I’m Kyra by the way.”  She extends her hand out to you. Glancing at it, you smile softly and take it.
“I know, Caitlin and Steph never shut up about you. I’m Y/N, Y/N Y/L/N.” 
“You’re the Y/N Y/L/N? Holy shit, Caitlin and Steph never shut up about you.” A small blush forms on your cheeks. Kyra swoons at how flustered you look. She takes another second to admire everything about you. Just as she went to speak again a voice from behind her called out, telling her the press conference was about to start. “I’m really sorry, I’ve got to go. It was nice meeting you, I’ll see you later, yeah?”
“Yeah.” With one last smile, Kyra begins to back up and then turns and jogs to the man waiting for her. Tentatively, you touch your cheeks where the blush was still, very prominently, there. 
2 months ago
You watch from afar as Kyra, Caitlin, and Steph swing around from the bars singing along to Strawberry Kisses. A smile appears on your face when Kyra lets out a loud, silly laugh. 
A voice startles you out of your love-possesed trance, “You know, you’re really not subtle, like, at all.” 
“Shut up, Beth.” The England national smirks and for the next fifteen minutes proceeds to tease you about your developing crush on the new signing. 
“Okay, Beth, I think she gets it.” Your saviour, Viv, intervenes after her girlfriend makes a kissy face aimed towards you and Kyra. Beth groans and mumbles something about Viv not being any fun. Viv lets you go back to watching Kyra workout/goof around for a few moments before throwing her two cents in,
“You like her? Like, like like her?”
You sigh, “I don’t know yet. Would it be terrible if I did?” 
Viv shakes her head with a small chuckle, “Would it be terrible if you found someone you really liked and someone who is genuinely a good person? No, it’s not that bad.” You roll your eyes. 
“It feels pretty terrible. But, I guess it’s not too bad, especially since she’s never gonna like me back.” The older woman gives you a look, one that screams “you’ve got to be joking right now”. You and Viv had a certain connection to each other. Both of you were introverts on a team full of extroverts, so it was nice to have someone who didn’t mind just sitting in peace and quiet without any of the pressure of having to be “on”. 
“If Kyra liking you back is so crazy, then why is she staring at you right now with literal heart eyes?” Your head whips forward to find Kyra already looking at you. A blush was already creeping up your neck and you hadn’t even held eye contact for more than two seconds. 
Kyra is watching you carefully when your head turns to look at her. Her heart flutters when your cheeks tint red. A sense of pride swells in her chest at being able to make you blush.
“You two make me sick,” Caitlin says from behind Kyra. Steph is quick to shush the younger Aussie,
“They’re just in love, Cait. You can’t stop young love,” she says an annoying smirk tugging at her lips. Kyra rolls her eyes at her national teammates antics. 
“We are not in love. She definitely doesn’t like me, mate.”
“Sure,” Caitlin drawls out, seemingly unconvinced. 
“She doesn’t. I’m like 1000% sure.”
“Then why does she blush everytime you look at her, smile at her, or laugh?” Steph says, amused.
“Wh-What? No, she doesn’t. I think I’d notice.” The two older Aussies share a look, then they grab Kyra’s head and force it to look at you. Your eyes widen when you and Kyra make eye contact, heat already rushing up to your cheeks. She gives you a warm smile which does nothing to help your burning cheeks. Deciding that you’ve had enough biking for today, you step off the bike extremely ungracefully, bumping into everything and everyone. Kyra giggles from across the gym, her Australian friends rolling their eyes. 
“See? You two are so in love,” Steph tries to convince the younger girl. A frown replaces the small smile on Kyra’s face when you leave the gym,
“Whatever. You guys suck.”
2 weeks ago
“Y/N? Did you hear me?” Tony Gustavsson’s calm voice brings you back to reality. 
“Oh, uh, yes sir. I mean, yes coach. Thank you so, so much, I won’t let you down, I promise.” Your voice is shaky and weak. Someone’s warm hand covers yours, lifting your head up, your met with Kyra grinning from ear-to-ear. Returning her smile, you say your goodbyes to Tony and place the phone down carefully on the kitchen counter.
 You were, once again, at Kyra’s apartment. The two of you had grown closer over the past few months, unknowingly both of you had swallowed down your feelings for each other, convinced the other didn’t feel the same. It was driving the rest of the team crazy, and it was about to get worse. Finally, you had gotten your first call-up to the national team.
You and Kyra had been cozied up on her couch, watching a Christmas movie (because it’s never too early to start is it?) when your phone had began to ring. Of course, Kyra had already received her call a few days ago. It was hardly surprising, after the World Cup and with her recent performances for Arsenal she was an obvious choice for the last two friendlies of 2023. You, on the other hand, had long given up your dream of playing for the national team. Being a little bit older than Kyra and a lot more injury prone, your caps for the Matildas stood at a resounding, zero. You had never even been to a camp. So, last year when Tony never so much as gave you a call, you put your Matildas dreams behind you and focused on your club football.
“Who is it?” Kyra mumbles sleepily, she had been on the verge of falling asleep, it was impossible not to. You were perfectly situated between her legs, your head resting comfortably on her chest. The movie did little to distract her from the scent of your perfume infiltrating the hoodie she was wearing. 
“I don’t know, Ky. It looks like an Australian number.” 
“Wait, I know whose number that is.” She says, now fully awake.
“Who?”
She takes a deep breath, trying to hide her smile, “It’s Tony’s. Like Tony Gustavsson. The head coach of-”
“Yes, I know who Tony Gustavsson is! You don’t think he’s calling to invite me to camp is he?” You exclaim, your nerve levels rising as the phone continues to ring.
“Only one way to find out.” 
Standing up, phone in hand, you take a breath before accepting the call. Kyra sits up on the couch, her hands loosening her grip on your waist. 
“Hello?” Slowly making your way to the kitchen, Kyra only catches your side of the conversation. She takes a seat at the counter watching nervously as you pace back and forth in front of her. You pause. It looks like you’re trying to process everything. “Oh, uh, yes sir. I mean, yes coach. Thank you so, so much, I won’t let you down, I promise.” A full-on grin breaks out onto Kyra’s face, she reaches across the counter and takes a hold of your hand. After hanging up, there is silence in the small apartment for a few seconds. 
“So?” Kyra prompts softly.
“I’m going to play for fucking Australia!” You shout excitedly. You both squeal happily, Kyra rushes over and brings you into a tight hug. 
“Now we’re national teammates as well!” Kyra says into your neck, her heart pounding as you laugh your beautiful laugh.
Over the next few days Kyra helps you pack for camp, telling you all of the basic information you’d need to survive while also filling you in on all of the important bits about the team itself. Who’s friends with who, what not to say to this person, why this person acts like this. She was surprisingly helpful. So, when you, Kyra, Caitlin, and Steph boarded the flight to Australia you actually felt pretty prepared. Kyra sat beside you on the flight, chatting your ear off, you didn’t really mind though. It was how your friendship went. Kyra would talk about anything and everything, while you listened carefully, never ignoring her. She found it endearing how you remembered everything she said, sometimes she didn’t even remember herself. 
An few hours into the flight, Steph leans across the aisle asking Kyra if she knew who is supposed to bring them to the hotel when they land. Kyra remembers saying something to you about it so she turns and taps your shoulder. Taking out one of your earbuds, you look at them, raising an eyebrow. 
“Uh, do you know who’s supposed to be picking us up? I think I said something about it to you,” Kyra asks quietly, so as not to interrupt the other passengers.
“William.” You answer plainly. Kyra nods while Steph watches in shock.
“How in the hell did you know that? You don’t even know who that is.”
“Kyra told me last night, she also told me that she couldn’t wait to ride the ferry to Vancouver Island when we get to Canada.” Kyra blushes. 
“I can’t believe you remember that,” she says, slightly embarrassed. 
“It’s kind of hard not to when it’s all you would take about for ten minutes.” 
Steph has to cover her laugh at Kyra’s mortified face.
“Is that seriously all I talked about last night?” 
“You tend to do that. It’s actually kinda cute.” That last bit slips out before you can stop it. Now, you’re the one blushing. You decide it’s better to look out the window than to keep looking at them. Steph wanted to strangle the both of you. God, you were so oblivious. How could neither of you see that you were head over heels for each other? Whatever, you’d figure it out. Hopefully sooner than later because she had five pounds on you guys getting together before the new year. 
After landing and grabbing your luggage, just as you said, William was there with a car to bring you all to the hotel the team was staying at. Walking into the lobby, cameras point at you four. Kyra and Caitlin grin and wave goofily at them, probably saying something stupid as well. 
Steph smiles and waves happily, “Good to be home, huh?” 
You walk behind them, looking up and waving at the cameras shyly, “Alright?” 
“Hey, Y/N! Wanna do a quick interview with the other first timers?” One of the social media guys asks from behind the phone camera. Kyra stops. You look at her, uncertainty looming in your eyes. 
She nods encouragingly, “Go on. I’ll take your stuff and get your room.” 
“Thanks, Ky. I’ll see you later.” You smile and follow the man heading in the other direction. 
“So that’s the girl you like!” Charli shouts from across the lobby. 
Kyra flinches at the volume of her best friends voice, “Jesus Christ, Charli. Could you be any louder?” 
“Wanna bet?” Kyra shakes her head, not wanting to see how far Charli can take things today. “She’s really pretty, I can see why you like her.” The blonde says in a much more indoor appropriate voice. Kyra just rolls her eyes in response.
After a few good days of training and getting to know everyone, the team was in Canada. Walking onto the ferry with your hoodie drawn tight to you and your toque covering the top of your head, Kyra was bouncing off the walls with excitement and energy. 
“Kyra, for the love of God, please calm down.” Mini says, trying her best to calm the young midfielder down. Her words have no effect, Kyra continues doing laps around everyone. You were walking Sarah Hunter, another player about to earn their first cap, when Kyra gets in front of you and turns backward to talk to you. 
“Hi Y/N! Aren’t you excited about the ferry?” She asks. Her hyperness, you notice, was starting to annoy some of your teammates, specifically Caitlin, who looked on the verge of pushing her Arsenal teammate into the Pacific Ocean. 
“I am, Ky,” you lower your voice so only those close to you can hear, “But how about we tone it down, okay? We have lots of time to be excited, but maybe just chill for a few minutes so they can tell us where to go and what not, how’s that sound?” 
Kyra listens to you, she falls into step with you and speaks a lot softer and calmer. 
Mini stares on in disbelief, “Oh, Kyra is down bad. I mean, she didn’t even listen to me, but as soon as Y/N says something she’s on her best behaviour.” 
Steph shakes her head, “You should see them at Arsenal, it’s unbearable.” 
You and Sarah were in deep conversation about something Kyra couldn’t care less about. She wanted to go explore the ship, but she promised you she’d be on her best behaviour. Kyra is getting antsy and you can tell, she keeps turning her head every time there’s a new sound. You just needed to get wherever the guide wanted you guys to be and then she can do whatever she wants. Just as the team passes the gift shop, Kyra almost bolts. You catch her though, your hand intertwining with hers and securing her at your side. Kyra is taken aback by your actions and blushes profusely. 
In a break in your conversation with Sarah, you lean over and mumble into Kyra’s ear, “I know, Ky. Just hold still for a little longer, okay?” Kyra nods and presses a small kiss to the top of your head. You almost die of a heart attack right there and then. Blushing, you squeeze her hand and get back into your conversation with Sarah. 
“Holy shit, Kyra needs to man the fuck up and ask her out already,” Charli groans a few meters from behind you. Mini scolds her for her language, but silently agrees with her. 
“Fuck me,” You mutter under your breath as Canada scores, again. Surprisingly, Tony had given you and a bunch of other players their first caps. Unsurprisingly, Canada had been dominating the entire match. You were exhausted from having to run up and down the pitch for all ninety minutes. It seemed like you were the only player who wanted to attack, or defend, or do anything at all. You definitely weren’t blaming the other Matildas on the field with you, for most of them it was their first time in their nations jersey as well. You guys were also facing a team determined to get revenge and send off their hero in the right way, so that was not helping at all. What also wasn’t helping was that there was maybe five minutes left in the match, so both teams kind of switched off. No one really cared about this blowout anymore. 
Kyra was chewing on her nails as she watched another through ball to you get overhit and land straight at a Canadian defenders’ feet. She watched as you began your recovery run, eyes tracking the ball carefully. When Quinn tried to thread a ball to Prince you timed your slide tackle perfectly and intercepted the ball. The bench stood up clapping and shouting encouragement to you. Keeping the ball close to your feet, you stood back up and began dribbling into space. The defense were dropping off, determined to keep a clean sheet. Your eyes scanned the field hoping to find anyone making a run. Unfortunately, your teammates seemed gassed. So, you started to pick up your speed with the ball. Skillfully, you dribbled around Fleming and Grosso, picking your head up once again to find Tameka making a run on the weak side of the pitch. You hit the ball, aiming to lead her into the miles of green grass in front of her. She controls the ball in stride and continues driving down the wide right channel. Continuing your run, you jog up to the top of the box hoping to put any rebounds back into the box. Tameka sends a cross into the box, it heads towards the penalty spot, multiple players jump up for it. Ultimately, Gilles gets most of it and clears it out to the top of the box. Right where you are. Kyra stands up. You watch as the ball arcs in the air and starts to drop towards you. It’s as if everything is moving in slow motion. You plant your left foot into the grass, the ball drops and drops and drops. Pulling your right foot back, you wait for it to just drop a little bit more. Now. Straightening your leg, you watch your foot connect with the ball. The ball surges forward while your boot recoils from the impact. Your eyes track the ball as it soars through the air, it slips past the outstretched foot of Buchanan, Amy Sayer jumps out of the way. The goalkeeper tries her best, but it’s useless, the net ripples as the ball buries itself into the top left corner. Screaming is all you hear, you’re frozen in your spot. Suddenly, Mary is in your arms and the rest of the team is hugging you and screaming at you. 
“What a fucking legend!”
“Banger! Absoloute banger!”
“Mate, you’re actually insane.”
“First goal for the Matildas, bitches!”
Tears are welling up in your eyes as you set Mary down. Holy shit. You’ve always dreamed of scoring for the Matildas, all of a sudden that dream was a reality. Mary tugs on your hand and pulls you over to where the subs are screaming and jumping up and down. You laugh. Caitlin and Steph are the first ones to you, yelling at you that you’re a baller or something like that. After they let you go, Kyra is waiting for you. She’s got that blinding smile that you’ve always loved. She pulls you into a hug.
“I’m so, so proud of you, Y/N/N.” Her hands run gently through your hair, you sink into the hug, letting out a sigh.
“Thanks Kyra, for everything. Um, I should go though the ref looks mad.” She nods and relinquishes her hold on you. Jogging back into place, you breath deeply. Finally. You had finally done it. You were a fucking Matilda.
Present Day
The team had gathered for their annual Secret Santa party. This year, it was held at Viv and Beth’s house. All the players were crammed inside the living room, a lot of food had been consumed along with a lot of laughs being laughed. There had been a Christmas movie marathon (2 movies) where you and Kyra had found a nice spot on the couch for the two of you. There had also been a small potluck, everyone brining a small dish to share with the team. Now, it was time for the gift exchange. A few weeks ago, there had been a very formal name-drawing process. There were blindfolds and everything, you were actually kind of impressed at how serious the team took it. You had drawn Frida’s name which you didn’t really mind. You got along with her well, and you were both pretty chill so it was easy to hang out with her. Her girlfriend had helped you track down some Norwegian sweets that you know she loved, you also threw in an adorable polar bear stuffy you found at a cute gift shop in downtown, London. 
Everyone was going in a circle, unwrapping their presents and guessing who their Secret Santa was. So far, there had been some really sweet gifts and some really funny ones. Such as Katie giving Leah a toy keyboard, one that was really meant for two year olds. Katie defended herself saying, “It was appropriate for Leah’s skill level.”
Soon enough, it was your turn. You searched the small tree sitting in the living room for a gift with your name on it. Finding it, you carefully picked it up and sat back in your spot between Kyra’s legs. All eyes were on you as you gently unwrapped the gift, not wanting to be rude and just tear apart the wrapping paper. A gasp escapes your lips, hand flying to your mouth in shock. Everyone asks you what it is. You take it out of its case and hold it up for the team to see. Gasps similar to yours fill the room. A diamond necklace with your first name initial as a pendant hung from your fingers. It must have cost at least £100. You look around the room desperately, looking to thank the giftgiver endlessly. Multiple people shake their heads. Finally, you look behind you, Kyra didn’t meet even try to meet your eyes. Her cheeks were burning red, her hand rubbing her neck nervously. 
“Uh, do you like it?” You could hear the nerves in her voice. You were still a little shocked from the gift, so you stand up abruptly and grab her hand leading her towards the bathroom. 
Slamming the door shut, you whip around to look at your fellow Aussie, “What the hell? Are you insane?” Kyra flinches slightly at your tone.
“Do you not like it? Because I can return it and get you something else,” her voice was unsure. 
“Wha-? Of course I like it! I love it, I love you! But, Kyra this had to have cost a shiton, I can’t accept this as a gift.” You say forcefully, still not realizing what you had said. Kyra had heard it though.
“Wait, did you just say you love me?”
You freeze. Well, you had said that. Not on purpose, though. But, it’s not like it’s not true. Kyra tentatively reaches out and takes your hand in hers, 
“Y/N?”
WIthout even thinking you crash your lips into hers. She gasps, but eventually melts into the kiss, your lips working against each others perfectly. Her hands found their way to your hips, gripping them tightly. Your hands wrapped behind her neck at first before moving into her hair. As you tug on her hair she lets out a soft moan, giving you access to her mouth. Slipping your tongue inside of her mouth, she gently pushes you against the bathroom wall. A soft gasp at the cold tile lets Kyra detach her lips from yours and begin working her way down your neck. She presses wet kiss after wet kiss onto your exposed skin. Finally finding your weak spot, you moan her name quietly. Her perfume, her mouth on your neck, everything about her was overwhelming your senses. 
“Ky…Ky we have to stop, someone could hear us,” you moan out softly as she places more kisses on your collarbone.
“Mmm, maybe. Or we could just keep going?” She smirks playfully at you. Fuck, her smirk did things to you that you weren’t exactly proud of. Rolling your eyes, you pushed her off of you.
“They’re probably waiting for us to continue the Secret Santa. We shouldn’t keep them.”
Kyra groans and drops her head onto your chest. You laugh, and run your fingers through her hair soothingly. 
“Umm, I really like you, you know?” Her voice is muffled against you, but you heard her loud and clear.
“Oh really? I had no idea,” you say sarcastically. She slaps your chest in response. 
“Shut up, asshole.” Another laugh rumbles through your chest. 
“Sorry, sorry. I really like you too, Kyra.” She smiles lazily and leans in for another kiss. 
“Y’know, everytime I saw you I was, like, gay-panicking,” she confesses with a embarrassed smile.
“Awww, were you gay-panicking? That’s adorable.”
“Asshole.”
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fuck-customers · 4 months
Note
Kind of a fuck customers but also a satisfying story at the same time.
My role in the call center I work in involves taking specifically corporate calls, which means I spend all day talking to “business professionals” (and I use that term loosely) including CEOs. As you can imagine, over 90% of these CEOs are the scum of the earth and the most entitled assfaces on the planet.
A week or so ago, I took a call and went through my usual routine of greeting the cardholder and then began going over verification questions. Since we’re A.) a bank and B.) a bank that handles corporate and government credit cards, we take security seriously and require a caller to be able to verify 3 pieces of information based on what the person responsible for their credit cards put on the account. If they don’t pass, we refer them to their company to get the right details.
So as I’m doing this, the guy on the phone is getting increasingly irritated as he keeps getting the security questions wrong. I’m calm and professional the entire time but firm. Eventually I run out of things to verify with him and tell him that we won’t be able to assist and that he needs to contact his administrator. This is apparently where I went wrong.
“LADY I AM THE ADMINISTRATOR!!” He screeches. Ok, great. I look him up and that’s true but there’s a second admin listed, so I ask him to check in with him. He then yells “THERE IS NO OTHER ADMIN! I’M THE CEO OF THIS COMPANY FOR CHRIST’S SAKE!!”
I apologize and tell him while that may be true, he still got his security questions wrong and needs to reach out to his account coordinator then. This man then proceeds to scream at me for the next minute or so saying how we’re an awful bank, how he’s had problems with us for years, blah blah and how we have the worst customer service ever. Keep in mind, I’ve been nice and empathetic this entire time but also I’m not gonna lose my fucking job just because a guy in a suit doesn’t know his shit. I give him the email to his account coordinator and stress again that he needs to talk to them. Then this exchange happens:
Him: “So let me get this straight. You are saying you are REFUSING and UNWILLING to help me, right?
Me: “No, actually I’d love to help you, however we have these security procedures in place for yours and your company’s protection and cannot make exceptions for anyone.”
Him: “This is fucking UNBELIEVABLE! I’ve HAD IT with this bank!!”
Me: “Ok, I’m sorry to hear that. Anything else I can do for you before we disconnect?”
Him: “WHAT IS YOUR NAME? I NEED YOUR NAME. NOW.”
Me: *gives my first name and spells it for him even though it’s a very basic 4 letter name because I’m a bitch*
Him: YOUR LAST NAME.
Me: “We don’t give out anything but our first name for the safety of our employees.”
Him: *insert that condescending, pissed off chuckle middle aged men do when they’re mad here* “Well I’ll tell you what (My Name), when I close this account and pull my MILLIONS OF DOLLARS out of (bank name) and they ask me why, I’ll make sure to tell them that it’s (My Name)’s fault. And I will see to it that you won’t be able to get another job outside of the minimum wage fast food job or whatever you had before this. How does that sound?”
Me: “Sounds great. Now seeing as how this conversation is no longer productive or professional and threats are being made, I’ll be terminating the call, have a nice day.”
Him: “DO NOT HANG UP O-“
Me: *click*
And that’s how making rich, powerful men rage-cry became my new favorite hobby. Thankfully, I haven’t gotten any feedback on that call; not that I would, seeing as how I did my job exactly how I was supposed to. Anyways I hope I’m his 13th reason. ❤️
Posted by admin Rodney.
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luvhughes43 · 8 months
Text
all-american b!tch | hughes!sister
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guts masterlist🦋 - luvhughes43 masterlist🌙
summary: hughes!sister dealing with the success of her brothers, online hate, and her feelings of having to be strong all the time.
note: little bit of luca fantilli x reader
word count: 1.9k
and i am built like a mother and a total machine
i feel for your every little issue, i know just what you mean
and i make light of the darkness
i've got sun in my motherfuckin’ pocket, best believe
yeah, you know me
y/n hughes is the kindest girl you’d ever have the pleasure of meeting. as the youngest and only daughter of one of the most iconic hockey families, yn grew up in a turbulent world where she had learned to thrive. she plays the family sport, had to navigate through the hardships of being associated with her brothers, and she would be the first to tell you that her experiences had made her a better person. 
“okay trevor listen,” yn hughes or, as referred to by trevor, tiny tot, leaned in closer to the aforementioned boy. “it's quite simple… ghosting the girl will only make her trust you less. i know the podcasts have said that getting close to a girl then ghosting her will make them fall for you but seriously, that's such a bad idea” 
trevor nodded along to each word, pulling out his phone so he could draft a text to “the girl” in question. “okay so like… what should i say then?”
“hmm” yn loomed over the side of trevor's phone as she watched his fingers drift over the keys. once he had finished, he tilted his screen over to her so she could either approve or deny his message. 
there was a brief pause, “i can't tell if you're joking or not,” yn responds, causing jack to giggle as he paused to read the message over both yn and trevors shoulder. 
“I always wondered why you were better at meeting chicks at bars…” jack chuckles, “they never had to read one of your messages”
“its not that bad!” trevor whines loudly as he attempts to grab his phone back from you. 
you hold the phone away from him, swiftly raising your free hand to stop him from moving any closer towards the phone. “don't worry i can fix this,” you speak smoothly to which jack bursts into another round of giggles. 
“bro you cannot tell a girl that you-”
trevor clamped his hand over jacks mouth, effectively stopping him from reciting the awful text to the room full of their friends. “shush, the master is working” 
you rewriting trevors text was just one of the many things you did for the people you considered family. you would sit with luke for hours, letting him rant to you about his move to NJD back when he was still at michigan with you. you would have weekly recaps with your best friends and teammates about their lives, always making sure to help any of them out if needed. 
forgive and i forget
i know my age, and i act like it
got what you can’t resist
i’m a perfect all-american
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despite the positives, you got an overwhelming amount of hate for just… existing. you could be the most perfect person, and people who didn't know you would still come after you online. 
you would never admit to anyone that the hate and harassment bothered you but… it always stung. in the beginning, when you first “came into the public's eye” when you started playing on the umichs womens hockey team you couldn’t avoid the hatred. people from school had started using you for your connections to all the boys you knew, and before you had the time to go private on socials (you’re now public again), you would spend hours reading through hate and manually deleting all the messages. 
ynhughes86 posted 1 year ago
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liked by luca.fantilli, lhughes_06, edwards.73, and others
ynhughes86 welcome to the den🐺️🗣
tagged: umichwhockey, teammates,, and more
view all comments
teammate1 GO BLUE🗣🗣
lhughes_06 #goblue
jackhughes andddd everybody screamed!!
jackhughes number lookin fresh
liked by ynhughes86
_quinnhughes 〽️
trevorzegras tiny tot making moves🫡
ynhughes86 youve gotta let that go..
user03 the power of being a hughes💀💀
removed
user82 did daddy and mommy pay ur way in?
removed
user21 not surprised that shes playing for umich… lets be real no other team would take her. shes a hockey nepo baby fr
removed
user44 ??? have u even looked at her stats and plays? shes definitely good lol
user09 shes nowhere near her brothers levels lets be real
removed
user77 looks like she cares more about partying than she does about hockey... surprising.. not!😒🙄
removed
i am light as a feather, i’m fresh as the air
coca-cola bottles that i only use to curl my hair
i got class and integrity
just like a goddamn Kennedy, i swear
with love to spare
after a few months of going through hate comment deep dives, you promised yourself that you wouldn’t let them bother you anymore. In celebration, you made your instagram public again and paid absolutely no attention to any of the hateful people in your comments and dms. 
yhughes86 just posted !
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liked by jackhughes, umichwhockey, dylanduke25, and others
ynhughes86 just your average roadie🫡
tagged: teammate5, teammate2, and others
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ynhughes86 special shoutout to trevorzegras for losing our bet! without u i wouldn’t have been able to do what i do🙏 aka spend money at the mall
liked by trevorzegras
teammate5 we should never be let loose in the mall ever again
ynhughes86 we should never be allowed off the bus
lhughes_06 dub after dub
ynhughes86 oh u know it💯
luca.fantilli is this why you were teaching me about girl math? u were trying to justify your purchases?
ynhughes86 … no comment
user32 using trevors money… wow. so she's a gold digger too?
user91 u guys are so lame let a girl live
ynhughes86 just posted !
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liked by teammate, jackhughes, _quinnhughes, and others
ynhughes86 all the love at the banquet tonight
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teammate1 love uuu my forever girl
ynhughes86 love u more!! u looked so good tonight
luca.fantilli girl in the last pic is kinda cute idk
ynhughes86 kind of? 
luca.fantilli girl in the last pic is very cute im 100% sure of it
ynhughes86 the cute girl in the last pic thinks youre 100% cute too
lhughes_06 the guy in none of the pics thinks you guys are disgusting
user44 no style no game
user81 grow up loser
i’m a perfect all-american bitch
with perfect all-american lips
and perfect all-american hips
i know my place and this is it
ynhughes86 just posted !
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liked by luca.fantilli, colecaufield, _quinnhughes, and others
ynhughes86 perfect all-american or whatever olivia rodrigo said
tagged: luca.fantilli
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trevorzegras that's right no swearing for you tiny tot
ynhughes86 😐
user57 “or whatever olivia rodrigo said” yeah she hates women
user91 thats why she's so close to the guys but u didnt hear that from me!
user16 if u guys dont leave this girl alone…
teammate2 OHH BFF LOOKS SO HOT
teammate3 please marry me
luca.fantilli 🤤🤤
liked by ynhughes86
lhughes_06 nope. 
i don't get angry when i’m pissed
i'm the eternal optimist
i scream inside to deal with it
whenever something bothers you, you keep it in. you hold all of your troubles and worries so deep within you that eventually, they float away and come back to haunt you when you least expect it. you thought that if you ignored all of your problems, that they would somehow fix themselves without any intervention from anyone else. 
it wasn’t always helpful. 
all the time
i’m grateful all the time
i’m sexy and i’m kind
i’m pretty when i cry
“they only ask me about my brothers, lu” your sniffles were quieted by the fabric of lucas sweater as you pressed yourself against his chest. you had played possibly the best game of your career, and the post interview questions were all about your brothers and family. questions wondering about their training and practices and how that had impacted you, how their game influenced yours. it made you feel like you were irrelevant in your own career. 
“i am so grateful for my family and how they’ve helped me grow as a player,” you responded politely to the interviewers' inquiries. it's not like you weren’t grateful. you knew that your family had a huge impact on your skills and you were glad that they were there to help you. but nobody ever wondered what your individual experiences were. all your training had to be a direct reflection of your brothers. your playing style, even unrelated, had to do with your brothers. your wins were a direct result of their greatness. nothing you would ever do or succeed in would be solely yours. 
“i love them,” you sob, “i really do! i just want people to see me” 
lucas' arms tightened around you as he started brushing your hair away from your face. “i know, baby” he whispered into your ear, holding you close as he waited for your breathing to calm down. 
“i just wanna be me!” you slumped against lucas front, who carefully pulled you over to your bed so you could sit down on top of him. 
you could hear the loud pop music blaring from the speakers downstairs, and you listened in silence to the people trudging up and down the stairs as they no doubt looked for a bathroom. 
“have you talked to your brothers about this?” lucas' soft voice cuts into the silence. 
you pull away from him slightly so you could look at him in the eyes. “no…” you admitted quietly. “they wouldn’t understand,” you leaned your head against lucas shoulder as you cuddled into him. 
he hummed quietly to you, a hand running down your back to help further soothe you. “i think you might feel better if you open up to them,” luca hedged. both of you knew that your previous statement was a lie. 
“i don't want them to think of me like that…” 
“like what?” luca questioned, his hand never leaving your back as you continued to prop yourself against him. 
you sighed. “i just… they always come to me. i don't want that to stop or for them to think that im weak” your words were quiet as you finally admitted your true feelings to your boyfriend. 
“they could never think you're weak,” luca murmurs reassuringly. “luke talks all the time about how he thinks you're adjusting to life here better than he did,” you look up at luca inquisitively. “and quinn, he is so proud of you! he talks so highly of you all the time… and jack, i mean come on. they all love and support you so much. they won’t stop asking for advice or talking to you because you're having some troubles” luca explains. “also, there’s nothing wrong with being weak. you should let yourself be open with your brothers just like they are with you. you deserve that”
“have i ever told you that i love you?” you tearfully smile at the boy who was always so good at listening to you.
luca smiles back, “not enough” he jokes as he presses a soft kiss to your cheek. 
you brush a few strands of hair out of his face. “i'll call them tomorrow,” you add, reciprocating luca's kiss on the cheek. 
luca smiles, happy that you're no longer worked up and that you’ll finally tell your brothers your struggles. 
you spend the rest of the night hidden away from the raging party downstairs, wrapped up in your boyfriend's arms as you think about everything you try to hide. you didn’t have to be just one thing. you were allowed to be kind and to have complex emotions. you could be upset and angry without being a mean girl. perfect never existed, and you were glad that you were finally open to letting others see the cracks in your walls. 
lucas’ hair was soft as you ran your hands through his locks. “i love you,” luca mumbles. 
“i love you” you whisper to your boyfriend, placing a kiss on his shoulder as he shifts to lay his head on the middle of your chest. 
you easily fall asleep comforted by the fact that you were allowed to be flawed, and that no matter what, you’ll always have your people by your side.
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Text
Eclectic Ensemble
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Pairing: Steven Grant, Marc Spector, and Jake Lockley x gn!reader (reader wears slightly more masculine clothing but other than that it's pretty neutral)
Summary: Reader decides they're going to ask the moon boys out on a date. Things do not go perfectly to plan
Tags: SFW, asking out, neighbors to lovers (is that a tag??), swearing, uhhh reader is a major fucking dork who talks to their cat like it can understand them, no TWs it's all fluff
Wordcount: 1288
Read on Ao3
You couldn’t figure out why you couldn’t stop thinking about him. You’d had crushes before, and those were tolerable, you would daydream, but you’d snap back to reality at some point, and go about your day like normal. 
With the man across the hall though… that was something else entirely. 
You tried to convince yourself it was just the mystery of him, the fact that he seemed to have three different accents depending on the day, how one day he’d be cheerful and awkward while the other he’d be suave or stand-offish or nervous. 
But you couldn’t convince yourself of that, because even after he explained to you that he had DID and was not in fact a method actor of some kind, you still found yourself fascinated by him despite the mystery being solved. 
Fascinated by all three of them honestly. 
You’d talked to each of them in the hall before, learned things about them, even visited Steven at the museum a couple days ago. That’s what started it honestly, you’d chatted for hours after he got off work, each of them periodically switching out to have turns to speak with you. Sitting next to them by the fountain, rambling on about anything and everything as the sky grew darker and darker, it was the most fun you’d had in ages. And by the end of the night, with the way you couldn’t seem to shake the thoughts of them, you’d think you were in love with all three of them.
Which is also part of the reason you were so nervous to be doing this. 
You folded the collar of your dress shirt down, sighing at your reflection in the mirror on your closet door. 
“What do you think? Too much?” You turned to look at your cat, who was sitting on your desk, not at all minding that she was wrinkling all your papers. She stared at you for a moment, then licked her paw. “Yeah. Too much.”
There’s no way they’ll say yes, you thought as you unbuttoned your shirt. Even if one of them likes me back, what’re the chances the other two will be willing to date me if they don’t like me? Even lower chances that two of them will be interested, and definitely not all three of them. This is such an awful idea, why the hell am I doing this?
As you were undoing the third button you heard someone walking down the hall outside your front door. Normally this wouldn’t be cause for alarm, but you recognized the voice drawing closer and closer. 
“Yeah, I know it’s your turn to choose dinner tonight, but I’m just saying, could you maybe not go wild with the hot sauce this time? You always do that and then leave me and Steven to deal with the stomachache after--”
A voice speaking in Spanish cut him off, and you would’ve started laughing if the panic hadn’t seized you right in that moment. 
They weren’t supposed to be home this early! You were supposed to have another hour to get ready, to rehearse what you wanted to say, to work up enough courage!
You didn’t even stop to think about what you were doing because you could hear them getting out their keys, and if you didn’t do it now you weren’t sure you ever would. So you sprinted to your front door and flung it open. 
There stood the man you’d been waiting for. It was clear that Steven was the one who dressed them that day, wearing his oversized clothes, but the perpetually frowning face 100% belonged to Marc right now. He glanced over his shoulder at you. 
“Oh, hey Y/N! How’re y--” He cut off as he fully turned around to see you, and it was only then that you remembered exactly what you were wearing. 
Not only was your shirt halfway unbuttoned, but you were wearing a rather old tank top underneath it, your bedhead was not the hot kind, you didn’t have any shoes or socks on, and of course, you were wearing a pair of fluffy blue pajama pants covered in cat fur. 
Marc was clearly trying not to smile, but it wasn’t working very well, and for a moment you were glad for it, as Marc seemed to smile the least out of the three. 
“I uh--Well I--Okay I was going to ask you something,” you said with an embarrassed laugh, running a hand through your hair as a nervous habit, but also just to try and get it under control a bit. “But just--Just hang on, lemme put on actual clothes--”
“Pfft, you’re fine, we don’t care about that, you should see the things Marc tries to make us go out in some days,” Jake said, his Spanish accent replacing Marc’s American one. “He would wear pajamas to work if me and Steven didn’t stop him. Go head, what’s up?”
You stared at him for a second, and in that moment you remembered exactly why you hadn’t been able to stop thinking about them. 
Because no matter who was talking to you, each of them had that same soft look in their eye. The one that made you feel instantly better after an awful day, that made you smile when you were worried, that made you feel like you could be yourself in a way no one else did.
The one that didn’t care at all how disheveled you looked right now, only about the question you wanted to ask him. 
“Do you wanna go out sometime? Maybe for coffee?” you said. Jake blinked, and immediately his demeanor changed, his head tilting to the side as fidgety fingers rose up to touch the strap of his bag. 
“You mean, like a date?” Steven said in his British accent. “You’re asking us out? All of us?”
You nodded and suddenly felt like looking anywhere but at their face, running a hand nervously through your hair again. 
“You uh, you guys can think about it of course, you don’t have to answer right--”
“We’d love to,” Steven interrupted. You looked up to find him smiling brightly at you, the excitement so evident in him he practically glowed. 
“Really? ‘We’ as in, all three of you?”
“Yes, yeah, er, well we've been meaning to for a while really, we wanted to ask you at the fountain the other day but… I dunno, we weren’t sure you liked any of us that way, much less all three of us.”
You gave a small laugh and leaned your arm up on the door frame, shaking your head. 
“I honestly don’t know how I couldn’t like all three of you. Really it’s a surprise that all three of you like me.”
You gestured pointedly to your rather comical outfit, and Steven laughed. 
“I dunno,” he said, tilting his head and gazing at your eclectic ensemble. “It’s kind of cute, in a messy sort of way. Jake and Marc think so too.”
“Oh? Well maybe I’ll wear this on our date then.”
He laughed again, and you chatted for a few more minutes, long enough to set up a coffee date for Sunday, before Jake said he needed to get started on dinner (much to Steven and Marc’s annoyance). 
Once you were back on your flat with the door closed behind you, you punched the air with triumph, letting out a laugh of both relief and excitement. 
“YES, yes yes yes! Fuck yeah!” 
Your cat stared at you with her head cocked as you did a victory lap around your living room, before returning to licking her fur, and you liked to imagine she silently believed in you all along. 
THE END
If you made it this far, congratulations, you have read the first x reader fic I have ever written lol. Lemme know what you think, I hope you enjoyed!
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samuskitchen · 1 year
Text
a hopeless romantic all my life.
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⇒ osamu x hopeless romantic!reader
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summary : struggling to find your true love, you decide to give up on searching for a relationship, turns out the phrase “love finds you when you aren’t looking.” has some merit to it.
warnings : none that i can tell!
genre : fluff , self indulgent asf, maybe a little tiny hint of hurt/comfort?
a/n : sick of men disappointing me, literally am never confessing to a guy ever again. WHY ARE THE MEN IN AUSTRALIA SO LAME WAAAAAAAA
w/c : 1.5k
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you were first introduced to love through fairytales and fantasies at the age of five. by the age of 8 you believed you’d get your own fairytale love, you’d expressed your biggest dreams and wishes to the pearly white star in the sky. by the age of 13 you were determined to fall in love with your soulmate, full of hopes that he existed and was searching just as impatiently for you.
by the age of 19 you realised fairytales were a scam and that cupid would not be shooting you, or the stranger who offered his parking spot during your parallel parking struggles, with his blessed arrow of love. you’d done everything to make the process easier for that big-cheeked baby with the heart shaped bow. dating apps and school clubs, confessing to every guy you had feelings for, begging your friends to put in a good word with the cute guy in their class, yet nothing ever stuck.
so you gave up, if cupid wasn’t going to give you the romance anime love you craved so badly, you’d stop trying so hard. you resigned from putting any more time or effort into love, so sure that it wasn’t real and was not worth searching for.
and yet, here you are standing in front of the miya osamu, the cute chef in training at the restaurant owned by your uncle. so maybe the onigiri’s he’d given you during every visit were his way of expressing his affections for you, or maybe he genuinely needed someone to try out his recipes as he worked his way through his culinary course and his job at the ramen store. either way, your heart fluttered as he stared at you.
“i- uh…” your mouth opened and closed in shock, as you tried processing everything that just happened within the short span of five minutes.
8 year old yn would be kicking her feet in excitement, and 13 year old yn would be in awe that someone as handsome and as hardworking as osamu was interested in you. 18 year old yn would’ve been certain that you’d never see the day someone would turn the tables and confess to you instead.
“i’m sorry, it was all kind of sudden, i know. a-and i understand if you're off put by it or if you’re just not interested but-” he stopped his rambling as he noticed the wide grin slowly forming on your face, a bright and genuine smile that made his heart skip a beat and his face feel ten times hotter than it did a moment ago.
“‘samu, i’d love to get to know you better, maybe we could go on a date? when you’re free of course!”
“a date? a date! yes, okay— i’ll get back to you on when i’m free, could i- uh, get your number?”
and with that you secured a possible date with the boy who had been nothing more than your uncle’s apprentice. you made your way home with a satisfied smile on your face and a heart pumping loudly with the adrenaline that still courses through you. nothing could ruin your mood in that moment.
two weeks of radio silence from the man who confessed, two weeks of false hope and tears in your room, left to comfort and berate yourself all alone. you felt so stupid, to be crying over some guy who just happened to feed you the best onigiri and ramen you’d ever eaten and had made you feel so special, you just couldn’t convince yourself that he wasn’t worth your time or tears.
you avoided your uncle’s shop for a few weeks in hopes of avoiding samu in the process, however, after two more weeks of that, your luck had run out. your mother left you with the task of delivering the aprons she’d fixed up for the cozy little ramen store.
begrudgingly, you picked up the stack of folded aprons, holding them under your arm as you huffed and puffed all through your journey to the infamous shop.
from the outside, the place brought a great sense of comfort, a paper lantern to the right of the door that emitted a soft glow and warmth if you got close enough. the tiles to the roofing were a midnight grey and the two windows on the front of the shop had the curtains drawn halfway, still allowing you to see the orange glow of the interior lights. the smell of the freshly made ramen had you salivating, the strong smell of sesame oil or the sizzling of the meat being grilled had you reaching for the handle before you could second guess your decision.
“uncle! i brought your aprons—” the man on the other side of the door was, unfortunately, not your uncle. instead, samu stood over the grill with one hand on his hip, the other using a wooden paddle to push around the meat in front of him. samu glanced at the door before looking back down at the food.
“he isn’t here today, sprained his wrist this morning and asked me to watch over the store for the night.”
you blinked, once, twice before deflating. “oh… i’ll just leave the aprons in the back then…” awkwardly, you coughed before shuffling past him and the bar into the back room where the security and staff room was.
with a sigh you dropped the aprons on the cluttered table, not paying any mind to what it fell on or knocked over. what a dick you thought as you ruminate over the short interaction you just had with the main cause of all your dilemmas in the past two weeks. he barely even glanced at you!
you huffed, pouting as you pushed the door open, ready to just ignore his existence and scurry home as quickly as possible. but of course, the universe liked using you as its favourite punching bag, and so instead of sneaking your way out of the store that once brought you great comfort, you run straight into the sturdy and broad chest of the one and only osamu miya.
he stared down at you quietly, a furrow in his brows and his lips pursed. he stared deeply into your eyes with a mix of concern and frustration, he took a deep breath before he finally broke the staring battle.
“if you weren’t interested, you could’ve told me that day, you didn’t need to give me a fake number.” osamu’s voice was quiet, the disappointment and sadness seeping through his words.
you gaped up at him, the audacity of this man! he was the one who stood you up, and yet you’re being blamed?
“i messaged you everyday, miya. don’t act like i was the one who wasn’t interested, when you were the one who ignored me.”
“what? what are you talking about, you never messaged me!” he fished his phone out, opening up the messaging app and forcefully pushed his phone into your hands, the message thread between the two of you being left empty save for the few messages he had sent.
“…wait what?” you mumbled to yourself, pulling your own phone out to show him your own messages.
the two of you stared down at the screens in confusion, you opened the contact information for both of you, staring down at the numbers.
“this is your number right, osamu?” you held your phone up at him, while you looked down at his phone to confirm your number.
…confirm that it was in fact not the right number.
“osamu… why is my number wrong?” you look up at the man incredulously, as he reciprocated the look. “i could ask you the same thing.” he grumbled.
you both stood in silence for a few seconds before he let out a relieved laugh. hand wiping down his face as he walked backwards towards the cooking area. you followed quietly, mind reeling at the thought that this was most likely just a huge misunderstanding.
“i guess maybe in the excitement we both just mistyped the numbers? thank god, you almost broke my heart yn!”
your scoff was mixed with a laugh as you sat on the stool by the bar. “speak for yourself, i was crying for a good week, almost two.” you sheepishly rubbed your cheeks in hopes that your embarrassment would disappear.
the two of you talked as he worked throughout the night, ending it off with him walking you home and giving his actual number, double checking that it was right by calling him before he left. when you walked through the door of your house, you kicked off your shoes in the entrance in excitement, hopping up the short platform and sprinting to your room.
you dropped onto your bed with a squeal, feeling all the emotions of love and envy exploding within you like fireworks. you could feel your younger self applauding you for not messing things up and cheering you on as you worked towards accomplishing her dreams.
with a sigh you glanced outside the window, staring at the bright star in the night sky. “sorry for not believing in you, thanks for listening to my wishes…” you smiled softly before reaching for your phone, pulling open samu’s contact.
‘so, about that date. what about a trip to the aquarium?’
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All Things End 1
Warnings: non/dubcon, mentions of loss (death, miscarriage), and other dark elements. My username actually says you never asked for any of this.
My warnings are not exhaustive but be aware this is a dark fic and may include potentially triggering topics. Please use your common sense when consuming content. I am not responsible for your decisions.
Characters: Arvin Russell
Summary: Newly widowed, you take a job at the local grocer to make end's meet.
Part of the Backwoods AU
As usual, I would appreciate any and all feedback. I’m happy to once more go on this adventure with all of you! Thank you in advance for your comments and for reblogging.
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Your shoulders bangs and you falter, setting the bag of flour back on the flat. It’s been bothering you lately, mostly in the mornings. The joint burns when you raise your arm too far and there’s a knot right under your shoulder blade. You hold back a grunt and try again, heaving the heavy sack onto the shelf, a dusting puffing onto your apron.
You reach for the next but find it no easier. Before you can take the next, it’s lifted out of your grasp and easily placed on the stack. You look up at the man as he grins at you. You know him but everyone knows everyone around here. 
You might know his name but you don’t know much of Arvin Russell. He’s younger than you, much younger. You knew his father when he was still around but he died years ago. Funny how those things go.
“Let me get this” he chimes and hauls another sack onto the shelf. 
You stand straight, hands on your hips, “please, you don’t gotta… it’s my job.”
“They got a lady like you doing all this?” He asks as he tosses another like it’s nothing. Are they really that heavy or are you just getting weaker?
“Really, I can’t let you–” you grab the other end of the sack in his hands.
“I don’t mind,” he insists.
“That’s nice but my manager–”
“Ah, don’t worry about him,” he shrugs and a strand of his reddish hair droops down his forehead.
“Really, it’s fine,” you tug on the sack again.
“My mama taught me not to let a lady do the heavy lifting,” he argues.
“Well, I’m sure she meant the young pretty ones,” you wrestle away the bag and do you best not to teeter, “you’re nice but I gotta do this.”
He lingers, watching you, waiting for you to falter. You hold your breath as you ignore the fire in your shoulder. You’re embarrassed. When you were his age, it wouldn’t be a real task. He can’t understand the way the years eat away at you, though you suspect he understands some things.
“I didn’t know you worked here,” he says as he takes a can from the shelf, paying special attention to the baking powder label.
“Couple months ago…” you say vaguely.
“Mmm,” he nods and puts the can back, “I… awful what happened to your old man.”
“Yours too,” you counter and cringe, “sorry, I–”
“It’s okay, you get it,” he says, “never really goes away, does it?”
You shake your head, “not really.” 
You drop the last bag on the shelf and huff. You wipe your hands on your apron and grab the dolly handle, pumping the flat up on the wheels. Arvin steps back to the other side of the shelf to clear your path.
“Thanks,” you steer past him.
“No problem,” he hums, “have a good one.”
You keep on, turning the flat towards the warehouse doors. You push through the swinging doors and leave it with the rest for Casey to load or unload. You roll your shoulder but it only makes it worse. You whimper and kick the doors open with your foot as you go back onto the floor.
There’s no hiding since you started at the grocery store. Every face is familiar, every eyes is judging, they all know who you are, and they all look at you with pity. The whispers are often louder than that. 
‘Poor thing.’ ‘Did you hear how her husband went?’ ‘Never even had a child.’ ‘Never one that lived.’ 
Your grief makes for good gossip. You ignore their wagging tongues. You need money if you want to keep the house and what Ben left behind, isn’t enough to last. It’s the only thing left of him and you can’t let it go.
You go up to cash and take over at the till. Lynette puts her basket on the counter as she greets her in her crowlike voice. She’s the worst of them. Everyone knows she sits on her phone and makes her rounds, calling to gather intel like some mafioso.
“Did ya hear?” She beams, “Molly’s having a fifth.”
“Oh, that’s wonderful,” you put on a fake smile as you play minion.
“Don’t know yet if it’s a boy or a girl, though I think she’s got enough of both–” she suddenly covers her mouth, “oh, hon, I forgot, I’m so sorry–”
“Hm? What do you mean?” You hold back your agitation.
Of course it wasn’t an accident. She’s needling for something. She wants to see you crack. Life hasn’t been kind but you’re just fine with it. You’re getting on.
“It’s just… I know it’s been hard and now… Benny’s gone…”
“Ben,” you correct her, unable to restrain that ounce of distaste, “it’s life.”
“Mmm, you have my sympathies,” she places her hand over her heart as you scan a dozen can of discount tuna. She must have a pantry full of Atlantic skipjack.
You grumble as you focus on your work. She won’t get much from you but you sure she’ll make something up. She’s got too much time for her own good. Her only hobby is talking. You read out her total and accept her check, tucking it under the drawer. Only your goodbye is genuine as you’re all too happy to see the back of her.
You look over as Arvin approaches. Unlike Lynette, he takes the items from his basket and sets them on the counter. You could sing just at the simple consideration. You ask him if he wants a bag as you start scanning.
“Should just need the one,” he says, “slow day?”
“Always is around here,” you shrug, wincing at the tug in your shoulder.
“Don’t mind, it’s my day off,” he smiles, “but I hope it goes by quickly for you.”
“Eh,” you mutter as you put a can of maple beans in the paper bag. Those were Ben’s favourite, you’d make him with sausage and a bit of your blueberry chutney. “Hope you’re not spending your whole day doing errands.”
“Just this,” he says brightly. You look at him as he beams, watching you with that grin. He’s polite, his father would be proud. “How much do I owe ya?”
You give him his total and he counts out bills from his wallet. You return his change and a receipt. He tucks them away as you go to grab his bag. He’s quicker, scooping it away before you can get it.
“I got it,” he says, “you take it easy.”
“Uh, thanks, have a good day,” you stand straight and your cheek ticks as a strike of lightning runs up the back of your neck.
“Shoulder won’t get any better if you don’t,” he tuts as he struts around the end of the counter.
You furrow your brow as you watch him go. He offers a small wave before he sets his sights to the exit. You turn back to the till and grip the edge of the counter. How did he know?
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agendabymooner · 5 months
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the little schuminis || ms47 fic
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dad!mick schumacher x mom!ofc
EXTENSION TO SHE’S EVERYTHING… AND HE’S JUST MICK! (SMAU) + MICK, MULTIPLIED (SNAPSHOT)
Summary: Barbie Schumacher was the best mother there is to Mick’s little carbon copies. OR four times when Mick showed his devotion for his kids, and the one time his devotion paid off.
Content warning: Made this in about an hour— did not proofread this but I love it bc F1 driver with kids, All around fluff, Mick issa good dad, Michael Schumacher and Sebastian Vettel being wingmen to their kids (Barbie and Mick), Michael’s clowning his own son, many Schumacher kids
Note: @avaleineandafryingpan I know this isn’t much but I hope you love this request babygorl 😭😭🫶 my heart beats for you fr. Enjoy some dad!Mick content xx
a - n masterlist
o - z masterlist
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i. the time with minna schumacher’s late night wake up call
Shrill cries of a newborn love was equal to the agony that Barbie Schumacher — formerly Blanco Vettel — felt as she groaned quietly. 3 AM never felt this awful until her firstborn child reached her teething stage, and all Barbie wanted to do was cry like her daughter was doing in her nursery now. 
Perhaps it wasn’t ideal to have a baby at the age of 27. Many people told her that her spouse wasn’t ready for that kind of commitment— that he was still on the peak of his career as a formula one driver. 
And Mick was in the midst of a season when Minna Elisa Schumacher was born. Being away from her for far TOO long was something he didn’t want, but he was forced to leave as soon as Minna reached her 47th hour of her life. Mick never hated something this much until his career made him choose. 
Barbie grumbled as she reached for her nightgown and slipped it on, only for a large hand to pull her back to the mattress as the German man murmured, “I’ll get her, liebling.” 
“Mick…” Barbie hadn’t really wanted to make him get up, seeing as he just arrived four hours ago after his triple header.
“‘s okay, I’ll get Minna,” he muttered, reaching out to kiss his wife’s forehead. “Just go get settled down and you can feed her here.” 
The blond man had immediately found Minna crying in her crib as he cradled her, heading downstairs to grab some iced teether to help soothe her gums. “Shh,” he shushed her gently, the baby’s cry subsiding immediately as she sucked on the teether. “You hungry, liebe? Or ‘s it just your gums?” 
“We have to stop waking your mom up at such an early time, Minnie baby,” he sighed, rocking her in his arms as they made their way back up to the bedroom. “She’s been awake all the time— she works too hard for us.” 
“She’s amazing, no?” Mick asked his daughter as if she could understand every single word he was saying. 
“Ma…” Minna mumbled regardless, clinging to his arms as Mick grinned tiredly. 
“Yeah, I know,” Mick nodded. “She’s working too hard, Minna. I’m glad she’s here to see you grow like this, liebe.” 
“Talking to Minna again, Schums?” A soft voice reached his ears as Mick looked back at his wife, who had her back against the headboard as she smiled tiredly and extended her arms. 
“Of course, Barbie,” Mick chuckled. “She’s got to learn her words, one of these days.”
“No need to lecture her though,” Barbie told him. But it wasn’t anything that she didn’t appreciate; she always liked it when Mick talked to their child like Minna understood everything. He had been doing this since Barbie fell pregnant with the girl— he’d often crouch down or lay next to her bulging stomach to speak to the growing baby inside of her. 
It showed Barbie that Mick was a committed father. It showed that regardless of his situation as a busy driver, he always saw his family as his number one priority. Perhaps that was why Barbie loved Mick so much. 
ii. the time with gisela schumacher’s first ballet show
Gisela Belle Schumacher’s first little ballerina performance was happening in the program facility and everyone made sure to show up. 
By everyone, I mean Barbie’s family, the Vettels, and Gisela’s (or Gigi) aunt Gina, Pippa Michael and Nina Corinna. The two year old was excited to show everyone what she practiced with Madame Pinault throughout her three months of being at the class. 
She was the tiniest girl out of the group, with her bright blue eyes and blonde hair making her stand out in comparison to her peers’ darker tones of hair. The Schumachers and Vettels knew which one to look out for while they waited at the auditorium.
Barbie peered down at her phone and sighed quietly. Mick wasn’t here yet. Stupid flight of his.
At Gigi’s age, she couldn’t easily grasp the concept of people not being able to make it to certain events at the right time. All she knew was that she was going to show her Dada how she could balance on her tiptoes without a problem. 
And of course, Mick couldn’t find himself to break her heart like that. And so, after the Brazilian GP, he took the fastest flight back to Lausanne. 
And there he was, rushing inside the auditorium with the biggest bouquet for the littlest girl. 
Minna’s announcement led the families to look at him as Mick kissed Barbie’s lips and Minna’s cheeks.
“I’m sorry I’m late,” Mick apologized, “the baggage claim took longer than expected.”
“She hasn’t gone out yet,” Barbie laughed quietly, mindlessly caressing Minna’s blonde hair as she continued to speak, “glad to see you back from the race in one piece, though. With the biggest flowers too.”
Later after the performance, Gigi ran around the Schumacher home with the bouquet bragging about the flowers her Dada had given her. Barbie laughed at the sight of the girl— she was too adorable.
Mick laughed along, as he knew that he’d be more than happy to come carrying the biggest flowers for his girl— even after the longest double header he’s had. After all, nothing can stop him from being the best father to his children.
iii. the time with mika schumacher’s birthday party
“Who decided that setting up a pet display should be this fuc—“
“Mick, watch your words.”
“Sorry, Dad.” 
“Stop going crazy,” Michael said with a frown, throwing the small giraffe plushie at the direction of his son, to which Mick reacted with an ‘Ow!’ after being hit in the face. “This isn’t the first birthday party you’ve handled.” 
“Well this is the first one where ‘pet adoptions’ are a thing,” Mick gestured at the safari animal plushies at hand. “I don’t know what came up to Gina thinking it’s easy to find bulk plushies, but this is the hardest thing I’ve ever done— and I have three kids, Dad!”
“Because you can’t control yourself,” Michael mumbled, making Mick glare at him. Michael shrugged, “Am I incorrect?” 
Mick couldn’t even find himself to argue with his dad. Six years into the marriage, and he and Barbie already had three kids under seven. 
“I’m just so used to the girls wanting princesses and all of that,” Mick pouted lightly. 
Michael sighed, “Well, now you have Mika— think of him as you. What did you like when you’re a kid? Put yourself in his shoes. Don’t tell me you’re having an existential crisis three kids into marriage? I’m actually gonna be disappointed if you didn’t think that before you had the kids— you’ve been a driver for years!” 
“How can you find a time to joke about it,” Mick sighed exasperatedly. “I don’t even know why I’m here being an ass about my kid’s birthday party.” 
“Because,” Michael told him with a purse of his lips, “you’ve never had a son before— that’s why you’re stressing out about messing up.” 
“I struggled with you for a good while,” Michael shrugged nonchalantly, “Gina was into princesses and pink ponies. You were a boy— I didn’t know what baby boys liked. But I was a racer, that’s why I didn’t have any questions— I still hesitated though because you might like something else and I have to be aware of it.” 
“From what I can tell, you’re doing an alright job so far,” Michael smiled at Mick, patting him on the shoulder. “Miki’s been a happy child. That’s what matters, no?”
“So pick up your sad face and put those plushies up,” Michael said.
A delighted scream came from inside the house as the year old boy escaped from Kimi Vettel’s chasing, giggling as Mika Sebastian Schumacher ran as much as his little legs could handle. 
Eventually he found himself in the arms of Mick as Mika hid from his Uncle Kimi. 
“Da!” Mika screamed delightfully, kicking his legs when Kimi Vettel began tickling the boy. 
Mick and Michael exchanged grins.
Yeah, Mick would continue to put these plushies up if it meant that he’s making his son happy. 
iv. the time with michael ‘mikey’ schumacher’s introduction to the world
Michael Senna, or Mikey, Schumacher was born sixteen hours ago, his tiny body was proof that he was so much like his mother. Yet despite the smallness of his, his facial features and expressions of contentment showed that he was his father’s son. 
Another Mick Schumacher had been born into the world, and Barbie and Mick (alongside their family in Switzerland) welcomed him with open arms. 
And no one was more than excited than the newborn’s namesake, his Pippa Michael, and Sebastian Vettel when meeting the little boy. In fact, they raced through the hospital as soon as they heard that Barbie, Sebastian’s adoptive daughter, had given birth to Mick’s second son. 
Michael was more than happy to meet the boy— just as he was excited to meet his other grandchildren— but to meet little Mikey Schumacher was a moment to remember for everyone. Because that was also the time when Mick announced that…
“I’m retiring,” both Seb and Michael looked at the man with surprised expressions as if they wondered if they heard him right.
Mick explained, “I feel like I’ve lost a lot of time with the kids because I’ve been racing. The kids obviously don’t know how much time I’ve lost because they’re young but… I do. Barbie does.
“It took me a good while to understand what Mika loved— it took me a while to learn how to keep Gigi from having flyaways in her hair during her ballet classes— or how Minnie managed to handle her equestrian routine without Gina or Mom.
“I’ve lost a lot of time,” he said with a small chuckle and a shake of his head. Mick then gestured at Mikey, who remained peacefully sleeping in Michael’s arms as he said, “And with Mikey, I think I can’t afford to do that anymore. I’m okay with one championship only.”
Sebastian broke the silence after, “I’m proud of you Mick,” he smiled softly before reaching out to hug his in-law. “Look at how far Barbie and you’ve come.”
“Back then we had to goad him to ask Barbie on a date,” Michael chuckled quietly.
“It took us eight years,” Sebastian joked.
“Or nine,” Michael snorted.
“We’re still here,” Barbie mumbled in her sleep, “stop making jokes about it.” 
“Still,” Michael said, “we’re very happy for you and Barbie, son.”
“This is where your life begins,” Sebastian nodded, “all you need to do is to tell everyone about your commitments and devotion for your children and wife.” 
i. the time mick’s devotion paid off
Being a retired driver felt great. It wasn’t everyday Mick got to say that— and now he had every chance to. 
Barbie’s family restaurant in Lausanne, one that she named SV et Blanco, had been built years ago— it was the Vettels and Schumachers’ pride. After she graduated from culinary school, Barbie worked as a chef in nearby restaurants before eventually deciding that she wanted a place where family could start their traditions through countless dishes and desserts to try. 
Needless to say, it became a local and even international favourite. Many tourists in Switzerland would try to stop by Lausanne just to get a taste of Kimi Vettel’s favourite spinach and egg soufflé.
And now, SV et Blanco became a place for the Schumachers to spend their time during the Friday afternoons after Minna and Gigi’s classes. Mick would always pick up his daughters with Mika and ten month old Mikey on their car seats.
And after that, he’d come dropping by the restaurant. With Mika on his pram and Mikey on his back carrier, he led the kids into the restaurant as they found their mother making her rounds around the place. 
“Mama!” Minna exclaimed before she and Gigi ran towards Barbie, hugging her around the legs. 
“Oh, excuse me,” Barbie smiled at the guests before she crouched down to hug her girls. “Gigi, Minnie— hello! How’s school!” 
“School is good, Mama!” Gigi grinned. “I got star for writing!”
“That right? Good job, Gigi,” Barbie grinned. “And you, Minnie? How is your school?”
“Okay! I want soufflé though!” The eldest Schumacher pouted lightly. “I wanna see Pippa and Nina!”
“Pippa and Nina! And Sebby— and Mamma Bel!” Mika shouted from his pram.
Barbie giggled lightly before looking up at her husband, “And…? How’s Dada, kids?”
“Dada’s not that busy,” Mick giggled, “hungry for some soufflé though— Minna’s right.”
“Well,” Barbie clapped her hands before standing up, “it’s a good thing it’s our everyday special.”
“Great,” Mick joked. “Otherwise we traveled to Lausanne for nothing.”
Barbie rolled her eyes playfully.
It was a good thing Mick’s devotion and commitment for his kids were paying off. Otherwise, he wouldn’t be the retired father that he is now— his kids wouldn’t be adoring their mother as much as Mick did back when they were teenagers and secretly in love. 
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joelsflannel · 11 months
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stress (j.m.)
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joel asking you to watch sarah is the perfect excuse to study somewhere that isn’t your apartment. its your last semester of undergrad and your neighbors provide anything but a quiet study environment and the stress is piling up. so what happens when joel comes home on a friday night, sarah having gone to bed hours ago, to you curled up in a chair at the kitchen table with papers and various large textbooks strewn about.
masterlist
Word Count: ~1k
Warnings: 18+ implied smut, pre/no-outbreak joel miller, stress, anxiety, final exams deserve their own warning, implied age gap (reader is a senior in college), FLUFF, joel being the boyfriend we all deserve, joel calls reader “sweet girl” and “my girl”, no physical description of the reader (he strokes your hair and you wear his shirt), no use of Y/N. 
this is entirely self-indulgent so while a major is not explicitly stated i’m a psych major and one of the classes i took was adolescent psychology. the professor was awful and i did in fact cry over the class, many times. this is also my first fic since like 2017 so hopefully it’s good, it hasn’t been proofread. enjoy <3
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You wouldn't really call it babysitting. You’d been dating Joel for a while now so when he asked if you could come over on weeknights to make sure that Sarah wasn’t getting into any trouble, “Sarah? Getting into trouble?” you immediately agreed. It was nice to have somewhere to go after a busy day of lecture after lecture and work on homework somewhere that wasn’t curled uncomfortably on your couch in your apartment, headphones in, desperately trying to drown out the almost comical stomping of your upstairs neighbors. 
“I’d love to,” you smiled as Joel’s face physically relaxed at your response. “Thank you, darlin’, really you’re a lifesaver.”
“Am I still a lifesaver if I tell you that I’m just using you for the peace and quiet?” you teased.
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Truth be told, this was your last semester of undergrad and you were grateful for the distraction. Between applying to grad schools and trying to keep up with your classes, it was nice to hang out with Sarah. You’d gotten close with her since dating Joel and you loved spending time with her. Plus since Joel worked pretty late some nights, it also gave you somewhere quiet to work.
You liked your apartment, it was cozy, all things considered, and it was nice to have your own space. That was until your upstairs neighbors moved in and decided that running laps up and down their apartment was a great way to pass the time. There was no amount of drowning them out that could make any kind of studying successful and you’d never really been able to study at the library, so Joel’s kitchen table it was. 
It was the Friday before finals week and everything felt like it was crashing down around you. Assignments were piling up, professors were waiting until the last possible minute to grade any of the semester’s work, and you were overwhelmed. So here you are, textbooks littering the kitchen table and notebook paper full of your scribbled notes haphazardly strewn around. It felt like you’d been staring at the same pages of your textbook for hours and you couldn’t help a few tears of frustration falling onto the notebook in front of you. In fact, you were so knee-deep into making a study guide for your adolescent psychology class, you didn’t even hear the front door open and shut.
It wasn’t until you heard the scraping of a chair on the floor and heard Joel, brows furrowed in concern, saying your name in a soft voice that you noticed him. You straightened up quickly, suddenly very aware of the mess you’d made on his table and the tears streaming down your face. “I’m sorry, I didn’t hear you come in,” you sniffle, wiping your face with your sleeve and sighing. His face immediately softened and he leaned forward to place a comforting hand on your shoulder. “Hey no, no don’t apologize, sweet girl. C’mere, what's the matter?”
As soon as he asked it was like all of the stress and anxiety came barrelling forward, slumping to rest your head in your crossed arms, “My fucking brain hurts.” He exhales a hollow laugh and moves his hand from your shoulder to stroke your hair gently. You turn your head to look at him, “It’s just… I’m so tired, it’s like my professors are trying to kill me and then I think about how even when I graduate, I’ll just be back in school to get my master's come fall. And don’t get me wrong, I want my master’s but sometimes it's just a lot, I guess.” 
He nods and continues stroking your hair reassuringly as you talk, hanging on to your every word searching for a way to comfort you. You shake your head and sigh softly, “I’m sorry, I don’t know why I just dumped all that on you.” He smiles at you warmly and tilts your chin up to cup your face. “You’ve got nothin’ to apologize for, I want you to know that you can always come to me.” 
You find yourself leaning into his touch as he gently strokes your cheek with his thumb. “Thank you, Joel.” 
“C’mere, darlin’.” He pulls you into him, pressing a kiss to your head and enveloping you in his arms, surrounding you with him. His smell, his warmth, all things Joel. “You’re the smartest person I know. Let’s just take a little breather, get you some water, and go sit on the couch away from all this.” He motions to the papers scattered on the table. “Sound good?”
You nod into his chest, not wanting to pull away from his embrace just yet. He chuckles and stands up, leading you to the couch. “You sit, I’m gonna grab you a glass of water” You crack a small smile and mock salute him as he goes to walk away. His own smile grows at the sight of you relaxing even just a little bit, “There’s my girl.” 
He comes back with a glass of water and a blanket. He hands you the glass before settling in next to you, draping the blanket over your laps, and pulling your legs into his lap as you curl into his side. He looks over at you and smiles, his eyes focusing on your shirt for the first time tonight. “Is that my shirt?” 
“Maybe,” you shrug jokingly, “it was absolutely pouring when I got out of my last class and I was parked down the street. So when I got here, I just grabbed one of your shirts and threw it on.” 
“I like it, looks good on you.” He presses a kiss to your head. “Now do you wanna talk about what all’s worryin’ you with school or do you just wanna take the rest of the night off?” 
You place the glass of water on a coaster on the side table and turn back to face Joel. You traced a finger over his jawline before placing your hand on his cheek and leaning in. He quirked an eyebrow up at you before closing the gap between you, capturing your bottom lip between his. Your lips continue to move against his, wrapping your arms around his neck to pull him down closer to you, his hands finding purchase around your waist. 
“Does that answer your question?”
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queer signalling: louis and harry living their beautiful queer lives, collected by me
since we must take note of our fellow queers when they signal that they are very much one of us, despite being closeted. since i've had a very very queer few years thanks to them, thanks to their signalling, thanks to them being brave.
(!! this list isn't exhaustive, and if i've forgotten your favorite, by all means let me know. there's always room for another edition. it's been a while since i made a compilation and felt there was a need of a new one on my blog. this one goes a few years back, since my last one dates from 2021 :'o. so yeah. here we go.)
harry in my policeman, playing a closeted queer man, based on the book that's long been one of his favorites. lauded by the director and co-stars for how well he portrayed this character, how well he understood.
harry wearing a green flower on his chest for the mp premiere, placing himself (once again) in the same line of history as oscar wilde.
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louis's green flowers on his initial 28clothing jersey at the first afhf, which includes bonus roses and 28s all around
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the entire late night talking mv bc!!!!!
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louis's rainbow stage lights during sibwawc. he really did that. every single night.
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the entire dazed magazine happening. “I’ve always tried to compartmentalise my personal life and my working life,” he explains. / “I have unlocked an ability to be myself completely, unapologetically,” he says with conviction." / “I think through my own sense of self and personal journey, I am realising that happiness isn’t this kind of end state.”
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louis's gay exit songs: most notably 'ever fallen in love (with someone you shouldn't've)'
harry flirting with stanley tucci
louis and his gay ass tank tops !!! we must point it out !!!!!!
all along
harry kissing a pride flag during harry's house ono in nyc
rainbow flare during the btm mv
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harry being gifted a mask of his own face at munich n2, which prompted him to say that he feels like he's wearing a mask sometimes
28 in a triangle for 28clothing!!!!!!!!
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kit connor soft launching 28 clothing. a young actor starring in a queer coming-of-age series, who was forced to come out after being accused of queerbaiting. he was the first one, besides louis, to wear 28clothing
harry's grammy's speech "people like me" (which ppl sadly misunderstood), echoing what he's been saying on tour for years. this doesn't happen to people like him. if they only knew, right?
harry's freddie-inspired outfit for the grammy carpet (which also brought back his theme for clown/jester fits, like harryween 2021 n2. wonder why)
louis's merch graphic where a boy is trying to smash a glass ceiling
harry posing for david hockney, actual living legend, gay artist of the ages. "Styles seems to know how lucky he is, adding, with a tinge of disbelief: “I’m in awe of the man with enough one-liners for a lifetime.” As to what those one-liners might be? Styles and Hockney’s mutual silence on that question suggests that what happens in the studio, stays in the studio."
louis having suspicious visuals during back to you, the only visuals of that type on tour
harry's 2022 harryween outfit: dressed as danny (literally. he did that. he went grease on us.) but wearing sandy's jacket
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louis at barricade aka held safely in the arms of strong security personnel
harry singing man, i feel like a woman and still the one with shania twain. while wearing a rainbow discoball jumpsuit (parallel with kacey musgraves wearing a rainbow dress to sing it with him years ago.)
louis's gay ass merch for the away from home festival
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harry dressed in nina ricci by harris reed, an explicitly gender-fluid line. "At 18 I found myself living in london creating ruffle blouses, corsets, fabric flowers and flares from my kitchen floor (...). My creations at the time were met with nothing but criticism for being “too feminine” or “costume”, teachers said I should focus on “menswear” or “womenswear”. l remember it really wasn’t until I started dressing for myself and who I was that it all clicked. @harrystyles was my first ever client who embraced the fun, fluid and expressive clothing I was creating."
continuous bluegreening. to name a few: harry's werchter fit, all this time lights, satellite caps in two colors only, louis's smiley flickering bluegreen on tour in 2022, the james cordon shit, louis in uncasville. enjoy this post here
harry's snl shoot unseens: him as ariel
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louis out in amsterdam at a gay bar
harry going to the women's only swimming pond (on a day it was open for men, but this is important to me okay)
harry's use of orchids in his visuals during 'she' during love on tour '23
the 'hairy mermaid' tour visuals
harry as a mermaid during the mfasr mv. as a supreme physical manifestation of harry as the mermaid he truly is inside. but in his true form he gets chopped up and consumed. literally
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as it was mv and its parallels with the matrix, hints to harry as the woman with the red dress.
louis jumping up on barricade against the one spot where a pride flag was draped over it
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oh yeah that exact same thing happened in 2022 too
harry forming a skirt with a pride flag in brasil after his pants ripped
that gay ass denim getup with the fur collar?? while wearing the fucking peace ring????
harry and phoebe breaking gender norms in the tpwk mv dance. no i'm not over it yet shut up
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louis wearing a basquiat t-shirt, another famously queer artist joining the ranks
harry bought an actual genuine basquiat. flex
harry dressed in skirts for gucci
"happy pride! happy pride! 'tis the season! can you tell i'm relaxed?"
"isn't all of this sparkly bi music?"
satellite mv rainbow planet tshirt
louis's bigger than me promo where he's literally george michael like??? IM SORRY???????
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harry kissing lewis capaldi at the brits
harry kissing nick kroll at the dwd premiere. lol
and... harry as friend of D O R O T H Y. sang over the rainbow. we all cried. especially me at this clip of harry glancing in relief at his band after over the rainbow.
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ghouljams · 7 months
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Ohmygod i have an obsession w price n witchhh!!! In my head after the events of tapped price comes back w his metaphorical tail between his legs bc before witch's wards kicked him out, she looked at him!! And was like price? And he def realised that she trusted him so much in that moment liek her instinct was to look at him bc she cannot believe he would let something hurt her let something of his (gaz) hurt her, not to deal w gaz or the fae magic, yk?? He def feels as awful as he can bc she trusted him and im making my own heart ache rn
It is genuinely so rrrrrrrrrr I am feral about that one moment in particular, because you're hitting the nail on the head. She trusted him, trusted that he wouldn't bring anyone/anything to her that would hurt her, trusted that he was looking out for her, and he gets that moment of his Witch's trust being shattered before he's forced out. That single "Price?" is a "How could you let this happen?" And it fucking kills him.
Price doesn't come by to see you for days. A week passes, then another, with his nose in his work. He can't face you, can't get your wide eyed shock out of his head, the bright crimson of your blood as it dripped from your nose. He can't shake the lingering ache of your magic in his bones, still working off Gaz's accidental curse. How could one mistake shake him so badly? Nothing shakes him.
Still, when his feet carry him down the familiar path to your garden he flinches at your sunshine. The overgrown garden that once seemed so comfortable now seems to only remind him of his failure. He stays in the treeline, watches you hum as you tend to your plants. You wipe the sweat from your forehead and roll your shoulders back, alive and well.
Why can't he forget the way you'd clung to him? His heart clenches in his chest each time he remembers the way you'd sagged against him, unable to keep yourself up any longer. It was the first time in a long time your wards had bit their thorns into him, distrustful and violent. You'd said his name like a plea for answers he didn't have, and it haunted him. How could he let this happen? How could he bring pain into your house? How could he stay away so long, avoiding you like the plague? A stern reminder of his own shortcomings.
You look towards your garden gate with eyes full of longing, something soft and sad dragging your brows together. Price steels himself to make his way towards your garden, then turns and leaves. He can face the court and all its dangers, but one witch turns him into a coward.
He makes sure to get to your garden wall before you come out the next day. Somehow that feels easier. The thought that you might look out your window and choose to ignore him sticks like a knife between his ribs, but it's better than having to approach you. When you do come out you're struggling with a tea tray, keeping the door open with your hip as you maneuver the delicate set out of your house. Price pushes off the wall.
"Let me help," He offers.
"No," you snap too quickly, "No, I'm- the wards are still all out of whack." Your explanation is almost as bad as your denial. He can feel the hum of your magic, the barrier as strong and friendly to him as ever, not a hair out of place. The wards are almost apologetic, not that Price holds it against them for doing their job. No. It's you, your expression is kind but your eyes are unsure.
You carry yourself like you did ages ago, like you don't trust him. Kind, not friendly.
Price swallows down his pride, and keeps out of your way as you set up tea on your garden wall. You set a steaming mug of spiced wine in front of him. It smells like an apology. What do you have to apologize for?
"Sweetheart," Price picks up the mug, his fingers tight on the rim of it, you hum questioningly, "you wouldn't be thinkin' of sayin' sorry for something, would you?" You pause your fussing with the precarious placement of your plate of cookies.
"Of course not," You don't look at him, "but if I was-"
"You shouldn't," Price cuts you off. He sips his mug as you fidget --he's never seen you do that-- it makes his stomach twist unpleasantly. "I would've made the same call," he assures you.
"You wouldn't have let it happen in the first place," You tell him, "I shouldn't have-" You cut yourself off, staring at your tea. Shouldn't have trusted him, Price thinks.
"I should have stopped him," he tells you.
"Is that why you haven't come to see me?" Your voice is so soft, and so god damned perceptive. The way you look at him makes his heart stop, like you can see straight through him. You'd make an excellent creditor if you ever wanted a career change, leading him exactly where you want him.
"Yes," Price admits. Your guard melts away, smile softening just for him. You could take a man's breath away looking at him like that.
"Stop that," You break a piece off one of the cookies with an air of finality, "you'll just have to find some other way to make it up to me."
"I'll think of something," He murmurs into his mug. He'd spend the rest of his life making it up to you if you'd let him. For now he contents himself with your small smile, an olive branch that what's broken can be repaired. If it ever was broken in the first place.
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running-with-kn1ves · 8 months
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Can we have more of Edira? I am completely in love with your writing!
A/N: This one is out to you Edira freaks and geeks 🎤! Apologies its not much proof read. Thank you to those always sending positive vibes <3 you don't go unnoticed 😽😽
TW: Suggestive content, implied past/future sexual relations, boobs+ butts, use of sugar mommy/daddy, borderline nsft
Summary: Just a night alone with your lovely (totally not gaslighting or manipulating) corporate fiancée.
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“Sugar mommy?” 
“Yeah its a… term of-- endearment. I guess?” 
“People around the office don’t usually use terms of endearment for me.” Edira squinted her eyes, scrutinizing your explanation. 
“Sugar mommy…” She contemplated again.  “isn’t that usually what you call some old creep preying on young girls?”
You slightly cringed hearing the term come out of her mouth again. 
“Well-- that’s usually sugar daddy; sugar mommy on the other hand..  Is usually looked at more positively. Like… a MILF.” 
“A MILF?” Edira scoffs. “Is that what I am? I’m not even a mother.” She sighed, pushing her greying blonde hair back with her fingers, looking back down at the paperwork on her vanity. “Or am I just old…” 
“Aw now don’t say that. You’re.. Like fine wine. Aging better with time.” Hearing the poorly constructed compliment leave your mouth nearly made you want to gag. Especially because you never thought twice about giving Edira such kind words; not when she still played you like her personal emotional dildo. 
“Besides, what does it matter anyway? It’s not like you cared about what they thought about you beforehand. Why now?” 
Edira massaged her temples, back turned to you as her head hung low. She had been getting increasingly more exhausted now that she had to focus on performance evaluations. You would’ve been worried for your job if it weren’t for the fact that you were sleeping with your boss, being strung along with her whims. You were safe for as long as Edira kept her interest in you. 
“You’re right,” She suddenly started, getting up out of her chair. “Its too exhausting to worry about what those lowlives think; I don’t know when I started caring.” 
Her crinkled white button up pulled upward slightly as she lifted her arms to tie back her hair. The last two undone buttons revealed the dark of her mesh, black thong as she stood in front of you. Her eyes closed as she wrapped a hairtie around the thick, straight tresses.
She took off her tight pencil skirt long ago, finding it far more comfortable to do paper work in the barest of minimums. She’d probably go fully nude if it weren’t for your scolding modesty, and the fact that the housekeeper had yet to go home. 
You scurried farther back onto the bed, repositioning your book on your lap as you looked away. But even as your head was buried in your book, you couldn’t help but peak your eyes upward; Not even out of sheer lust, but curiousity. You could never look away when it came to her-- and she knew it. You hated how she knew what her every move did, how it effected her surroundings and most of all-- you. You pressed your legs together, holding the book on your thighs as you attempted to get back to reading. 
It was like your subconscious willed you to look, to look at the way she dipped on each foot as she tried to position the tight black piece of elastic in a comfortable manner through her hair, how her swelled chest pushed against the white button up that you told her was too tight. But she liked it, liked how it made it easier for her to win over investors, how easily it won over you. Even through her padless bra and dress shirt, you could see the faint outlines of two round buds--
Nope, that was too much. You were getting ahead of yourself; how could you be so shameless? Especially with the woman who you cursed for all your problems and woes. However that was a double edged sword-- she was also to thank for your promotion, for the raise in your salary (as if that even mattered with her around), and your upgrade in housing. But what did that really matter, when your pride was missing?
The older woman sighed, breathily with a hint of a moan at the end. 
“I’m too tired to work on the rest of this... Why don’t you join me in the shower? I’m surprised you haven’t gotten in yet…” Edira commented, sliding onto the bed with her knees to get closer to you. 
“You wanted company, remember?” You rebuttled back, reminding her how you didn’t choose voluntarily to be by her side right now. 
“Ah, right.” 
She positioned her hands on your knees, leaning over to see the words on your book. She didn’t ask about it, instead reading upside down as she spoke. “So, all the more reason for you to join me. This looks boring anyway. Is this one of the books that I got you?” She asked, though you knew she wasn’t really looking for an answer. 
You felt slightly offended, though not surprised that she was criticizing your enjoyment. 
“It’s not. And.. I think I’ll just get in after you. Besides, Carla is still in the kitchen-- what happens if she comes looking for one of us?” 
Edira didn’t respond, instead walking out of the bedroom to stand in the doorway. 
“Carla,” She shouted, leaning on the side of the doorframe. “It’s already 10 hon, you can head home.” 
“Edira!” You whisper-screamed, looking her up and down as you saw Carla come down the hall. 
“Okay, Miss Edira.” The rounded woman put the broom back in the closet nearby yours and Edira’s bedroom, waving to you as Edira gave her a warm smile. The woman’s faint Bulgarian accent came out as she said her goodbye’s, the front door shutting behind her after she gathered her purse from the table. 
“What’s the matter with you!” You scolded. “I can’t believe you’d show up like-- that-- in front of Carla; do you really want to scare her off, I thought you liked her.” 
You grabbed your temples, shutting your book as the panic began to recede from your chest. 
“Oh please, don’t be so dramatic,” Edira waved her hand frivolously at you, shutting the door behind her. “ Carla’s seen me in much worse states, as have you--- wearing only half of my office clothes hasn’t been the worst of it.” 
“And I do like her,” Edira followed, pulling you up with one hand as you limply allowed her to tug. “She’s the only maid I can bare. Otherwise, I’d have you running up and around here cleaning up after me in a cute little maid outfit instead.”
“Housekeeper.” You corrected, giving her a frown as she lowered her hands down to your waist. 
Edira rolled her eyes childishly, pushing her pelvis up against the front of your hips, her bareness pressing against the warmth of your comfy sweatpants. You still wore your baby blue office blouse, not having the commitment to change the rest of your clothes since coming home. But its not like that mattered now, since Edira was so insistent on dragging you closer to the shower. 
She walked backwards, holding onto the drawstrings of your pants as she pulled you along. She held a gentle smirk, her undereyes slightly darkened from a lack of sleep. 
“Are you sure about this..?” You slowly slid your feet against the carpet, hesitantly following. “We both need our rest for tomorrow, and the shower isn’t always the safest opt--”
“Shh,” She hushed, grabbing your hips with a firmness as her nails slid gently under your shirt, running shivers up your spine; she knew you loved it when her nails ticklishly played against your back. “Just follow me, sweet thing.” 
She walked faster now, dragging you by the front of your pants into the master bathroom. Your socked feet nearly slid against the grouted tile floor, the rug cutting off abruptly. Edira shut the door behind you, her buttocks slightly sticking out in view as she turned away. 
You spun around, rubbing your face up and down as you tried to steady the anxiety that was clawing out of your heart. You always got anxious when she wanted to get intimate; she could be so demanding, so degrading if you did one wrong move-- but the praise, oh the praise made it so worth it when she pushed back your hair and said how good you were for her. 
Edira pulled you back around, watching you as she turned the lock, strands of hair falling out of her loose ponytail as they fell into her eyes. 
“Well, going to reject me now?” She asked, leaning dangerously close to your face. You had hardly moved away from the door once she pushed you in. 
“Well…” 
“Well, what?” Edira mocked, running a finger down your jaw. 
Her lips were so close to yours that you couldn’t pay attention to her eyes anymore, merely focusing on the breath that entered and left her mouth. 
“Say no, hm? I dare you to.” You heard the faint sound of her buttons coming undone, hands changing to reaching the tops of her buttons as she leaned in close. 
Her hand pushed to the back of your head, gently nursing you to kiss her as she pulled your sweatpants down just a tad. They fell with ease, her breasts softly squishing against your chest as you felt the heat of her body that was once kept warm by her clothes. 
“I know you can’t.”
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AITA for not watching my sick goddaughter and then not wanting to watch her sick brother
*fake names used obviously
Two days ago I got a message from my goddaughter's mom, Nancy, saying that my goddaughter, Natasha, had thrown up at school. The reason Nancy let me know was because her husband would be picking up Natasha's little brother, Dennis, who I watch from 7:30 AM to 3:30 PM most days.
Anyway, I have an extreme, irrational fear of throwing up. So after Nancy let me know Natasha was sick, I was afraid Nancy would then ask if Natasha could come over to my house the next day along with Dennis. Nancy works the night shift so she sleeps during the day and her husband works from 8 AM to 4 PM. I've watched both kids since they were infants. I love them as if they were my own, but when they're sick with a stomach bug, or just throwing up for whatever reason, I would prefer they stayed home away from me so that I can avoid getting what they have lol.
I've always felt bad about this, because they're little and I feel like at my grown age I should be okay with being around them if they've thrown up. Yet, I find myself internally freaking out about getting sick AND I get so paranoid I swear I make myself sick sometimes. Nancy knows this about me.
Sure enough, Nancy calls me and nonchalantly asks if Natasha can come over the next day with Dennis because the school told her Natasha couldn't return for 24 hours. Usually I would give in and say yes because I feel bad saying no, but recently my brother's have reminded me that Nancy only pays me 200 dollars every two weeks to watch Dennis four days a week, eight hours a day. Nancy has acknowledged that she'd have to pay way more at a daycare, so she appreciates what I, and my family do for them.
I love the kids, I really do, but despite having known their parents for so long it feels as though Nancy and her husband only really see me and my family as the help and almost expect us to always be available. Or maybe I'm just projecting my insecurities onto them about not feeling appreciated enough? Which I know is bad, but it's instances like this that have bothered me in the past. You wouldn't take the children to a daycare if they've thrown up right? Or if they're sick with something like covid (which they gave us like two years ago), or if they have a fever, but they've brought them over anyway. It feels mean, you know? Like I love the kids, but I don't want to get sick. Maybe I'm just a horrible, paranoid, awful person and I do think that sometimes. Ha ha, is this an instance in which it would be ok to set a boundary🤔😭
On top of that, I don't charge Nancy extra (nor does she offer to pay) when she asks me to watch the kids on the weekends for a few hours or when she's got time off of work and wants to bring them over. I know this is my fault, because I do not charge her, but again I feel bad asking for more money. My biggest fear for a long time was that she would stop bringing the kids over if I did ask for a little raise or asked her not to bring them over if they were sick, but was always reminded by my brothers that Nancy didn't want to pay for daycare. Still I felt too ashamed to ask for more babysitting money or for Nancy or her husband to keep the kids home sick, and again I feared she would find someone else to watch the children.
Anyway, I told Nancy no. I was very apologetic and reminded her that I get really paranoid when someone is sick throwing up. I told her I just didn't want to get sick because then I'd be out for one to two days. Which would mean I wouldn't be able to watch Dennis and she or her husband would have to miss out on a day of work. Nancy sounded let down, maybe annoyed? I'm not sure, I can't remember. I am kind of spiraling about it  as I'm typing this out now. I feel really bad that I said no, especially because Nancy called me from her car so Natasha heard me say no. Luckily, Natasha was happy that she would get to go spend time with her mom at work. Nancy works in an office as the manager of a warehouse, so it's not like Natasha had to wait in some break room or alone somewhere.
Then tonight I get a message from Nancy saying Dennis threw up, and the panic set in all over again. I feel bad telling her to keep him, even though she eventually offered to keep him home after my many questions: what time did it happen; did he only puke once; does he have a fever; how is he feeling now? I'm sure she's annoyed that I might say "Yes, please keep him." Because that would mean she would either have to stay awake with him and not sleep before work tomorrow night, or that her husband would have to stay home. I think I'm going to tell her to keep him. I feel bad, but I guess not bad enough, huh? I'm trying to justify it to myself, I know, but that's why I'm here. Am I the asshole?
What are these acronyms?
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moyokeansimblr · 3 months
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Update
Not feeling so hot and I'm not going to do anything impulsive at 8PM on a Friday evening but
here is a link to a sfs folder with ALL of my content that's currently only hosted on patreon.
I want to add individual sfs links to the tumblr posts but that's a lot and I'm now regretting never adding alt dl links this whole time... and sorry I don't think the downloads in the sfs folder are in order... it also might be some other things, like fixed meshes or stuff. tbh I just added everything I've made after April 3rd 2023 since that was the last time I uploaded anything to sfs.
I guess while I'm here... I was going to wait until after I finish up the last of my active requests (probably by Monday, I'm almost done) but I desperately need a break from CC. I sent a group message on the 17th to my $4 and $6 patrons encouraging them to cancel, but I know not everybody knows patreon even has dms so maybe you'll see this post and I'll reach out again in the coming days so nobody is wasting their money. I am so immensely burnt out and I need to not create for a while. This is completely my own fault, nobody made me work on CC for 8-10 hours 5 days a week for the last several months and I fully knew it wasn't sustainable ages ago but I kept doing it because it made me feel good, until it didn't. Quite honestly, even before I sent the group message the instant wave of relief I felt just having made the decision to take a break... that caught me off guard but just confirmed I need this. I do feel really awful about it because I feel like I'm letting people down but at the same time I don't want to hate creating which was already happening. That being said, I don't know how long the lull in CC is going to be, and if you're only following me strictly for CC I apologize. As said I am still finishing up one request I still had, I'm about 75% done with that as of this post. But that's gonna be it for a while.
There is a part of me that wants to stop using patreon completely and unpublish my creator page (which is what I'm not going to impulsively do tonight without properly thinking it through...since there are positives like how easy it is to download files and whatnot) but I'd again encourage not only those who joined the $4 and $6 tiers but also the $2 tier to cancel so that you aren't wasting your money. If I did do this I would definitely do the individual sfs links on everything first. I'd not just leave you guys unable to download my stuff.
So, what does that mean for this blog? I'll spare ye, impatient readers, who have already read a lot because I ramble⬇️
Well, as of posting this I still have THREE HUNDRED AND TWENTY FOUR Strangetown posts in my queue. And I'm not tired of playing that.
I'm looking forward to having an opportunity to do all of the things I've been neglecting. I'm finally going to go through the subfolder within my downloads of everything I'm downloaded the last few months and decide if I wanna keep it in my game or not. And finish default replacing everything. And all my other various little projects I haven't been doing.
Also, I want to start playing Veronaville 😮I've already started downloading lots from kattaty to replace the in-game ones, and I found a cool replacement for the neighborhood map. I am leaning towards making a new sub-blog for this so that you don't have to try and follow Strangetown/LFT posts and Veronaville/ALT posts at the same time. I've only ever played the Veronaville sims for like one day as part of a super failed megahood years ago so I'd like to get to know them.
So basically, I guess I'm a gameplay blog for now? Until I want to create anything again anyways, but I don't know when that will be.
I don't know how to end this post... I'm sorry for the disappointment, but thank you so much for enjoying my stuff 💛💛
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earlgreytea68 · 2 months
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Many years ago now, when I was a very unhappy and depressed lawyer, I went to see a therapist. The therapist diagnosed that I was suffering from severe levels of stress and asked me to keep a "stress journal": for the week between appointments, I was to write down whenever I felt my stress spike.
When I returned to the next appointment with my stress journal, the therapist was shocked I'd actually done the assignment. He said nobody actually keeps a physical journal. I suspected that maybe he didn't fully understand my personality type and the fact that some of my stress was the result of PEOPLE ASKING ME TO DO THINGS THEY APPARENTLY DIDN'T ACTUALLY WANT ME TO DO BUT I WAS RESPONSIBLY DOING THEM BECAUSE THAT'S HOW I AM.
Anyway, I digress, that's not the point of the story. The point was that when we looked together at my stress journal, we diagnosed that a recurrent source of spiking stress was receiving an email. This was so many years ago that it was before the smartphone, in the age of the BlackBerry, and every time my stupid BlackBerry vibrated, my stress skyrocketed. Having figured that out, the therapist was like, "What happens if you miss an email for an hour?" And that was hard to articulate. Probably nothing, tbh. Like, realistically I could go without checking my email if I was too busy with work, so why couldn't I when I was home watching TV? So the therapist suggested I confine my email checking to a set schedule. Only at the appointed times would I check my email and deal with whatever had come in.
And you know what? The world never ended, and it WAS a huge relief not to feel like I had to immediately be available for every email. To this day, my work email does NOT come to my phone and I only check it at my appointed times of day. (Actually, I resisted getting a smartphone until very late because after I left the law firm I thought the most glorious thing in the world was PEOPLE COULDN'T REACH ME.)
Anyway, I was thinking about all that today because I had a bad day at work and I realized that I was dreading checking my email and it just made me think that I have lingering issues around email. But then, the more I thought about it, the more I was like, ...no, I probably have lingering issues around WORK because of that job experience I had. Like, was it really about what emails I might have, or was it because I spent the day feeling manipulated in an unpleasant way that made me wary and suspicious of certain things around me, and then THAT made me think, like, I was overreacting because of the way that previous job experience was and the fact that the way it manipulated and abused me will never actually fully leave me, but THEN I was like, OR is it that I honed excellent instincts for that kind of situation happening and I should listen to myself when I feel that way, or or or--
Which is all to say that I wonder sometimes how I would have developed as a professional had I not had that career experience so early on in my life. But then I am in a weird way grateful for it, not because it forever kind of messed up my head in some ways but because I learned SO MUCH about those messed-up situations. Like, it was awful, don't get me wrong, but I did learn a bunch of coping mechanisms I still use today. Like limiting my email exposure. And I think I am warier than a lot of other people I know who didn't go through a workplace that mentally abused you the way that mine did, but I'm not so sure that's a terrible thing. I think it makes me touchy about work-life boundaries and i think there are way worse things to be in our capitalist society.
And also, every once in a while I think about the fact that I didn't think I was going to make it through those years but I did and I am pretty proud of myself for that, so also that. I made it through the other side when I honestly for real didn't think that I would, and every once in a while I have a day that reminds me of how I felt all the time back then, and it makes me remember to be grateful how many days I've gotten to have without that feeling.
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