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itsgrimeytime · 1 month

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feelin' flirty || Rick Grimes (TWD) x gn!reader

rick grimes taglist: @golden-hoax @mgparker @zomb-1-egutzz

AVAILABLE ON AO3

Summary: Being a long-lost friend of Maggie's, you wind up at the prison, a line of dead walkers behind you. You are promptly confronted with one Rick Grimes, and it's suddenly your life's goal to flirt with him as much as you can. Rick doesn't usually respond, but what if one day he does?

TWs: innuendos, talk of sex, shameless (and I mean shameless) flirting, mention of both Beth and Hershel's deaths, gunshot wound, blood, guns, knives, and all things TWD.

[[A/N: Tumblr has deleted this THREE times. I am furious, hello??? Also, someone should've been hardcore flirting with Rick, I'll say it. That's what this is based on. Do I have social anxiety? Yes, but am I still writing this? I am. Don't ask questions. ALSO, I do not know the TWD timeline at all, so I am making it up, thank you. Enjoy :))) ]]

With one last stab, you finished off the last... zombie? You didn't really call them anything, since you were alone. Maybe you should think about that a little more.

Wordlessly, you turned and stabbed another square in the head. Undead? No. Zombie? No, too cliché-

Another one.

It went on like that for a few more minutes, before you took a breath -with no answer to your question. Frowning at your knife being covered in... guts, for lack of a better word, you crouched down and wiped it on the grass.

What was that, 15? You didn't really count, but you should have. You were trying to get a new personal best actually-

"Hey!"

You froze, pocketing your knife, before spinning on your heel. The voice was fairly distant, so you weren't worried. Instead, close enough for it to matter, was a big building with high walls and barbed wire at the top of them. A prison. Huh.

"Up here!" The voice called again, and you startled.

Shading your eyes from the sun, you looked up into the watchtower, and sure enough, there was a silhouette. A guy, you think, with dark hair. That was about all you could say.

"Yeah?" You called back, curiously.

"That was cool as shit!"

You laughed out, probably for the first time in months, "Thank you, mysterious stranger!"

"Glenn!" He clarified.

Huh, you pursed your lips, before responding, "Y/N!"

"Nice to meet you!"

You laughed again, before feeling a pain in your stomach. When was the last time you'd eaten? You paused, trying to think. Three days ago (there was a box of Twinkies that hadn't expired yet in a stranded supermarket). Not great.

"Hey, Glenn?" You yelled, a little hopeful.

"Yeah?"

You pursed your lips, before deciding -taking a chance, really, "You got any food in there?"

Now, you were walking through the gate, which was a little dramatic. But, you kinda liked it. It felt like you were kind of a big deal, well, until there was a swarm of eyes on you. All different kinds.

You froze, licking across your teeth.

And then, a man ran up to your side -gasping a little. Was that Glenn? How did he-

He offered his hand to shake, and you accepted it -looking at the crowd, a little defensively.

"Are they going to kill me? Or...?"

"Shit," he turned to them, "-They just want some food, guys, c'mon!"

None of them even flinched.

"I don't bite," you joked, before frowning, "-shit. That was in bad taste-"

And then, a voice called out into the tense air.

"Y/N?"

You peeked over heads, looking, because-

Your eyes locked onto hers, and you nearly jumped in place -big smile blooming along your lips, "Holy shit, Mags?!"

You'd been friends, back in high school. You'd left junior year and tried to keep in touch. It just didn't work out. (You can't even remember now if it was her or you who stopped, at this point.)

Before she could so much as reply, you ran to her -arms wide open. She eagerly reciprocated, spinning a little with the force -you'd gotten pretty good at running at this point.

"What the fuck?" You breathed into her shoulder, and she laughed big and loud, "-What are the chances?"

With a thought, you pulled back -still holding her shoulders, "Are your Dad and Beth here?"

"Yeah," she cheered, and something in you felt relieved. Thank god, they were okay.

"And, you?" She offered, a little hesitantly -notable lack at your side.

You pressed your lips together, swallowing, and shook your head, "Been alone since the beginning."

Maggie frowned, hand coming up to rest on your arm and squeezing once.

"Only lived with my boyfriend," you explained, eager to lighten the mood, "-and he actually cheated on me, so. Wasn't the worst lost."

She laughed a little, before asking -carefully, "And your family?"

Something in your chest stung, you wordlessly shook your head. (Visions of unhinged jaws and blood filling it.)

She frowned, whispering her apologies before hugging you again. You leaned into it that time.

And then, you jumped back, excited, "You have to bring me to your family, Mags, it's been so long-"

"Ya 'ave to talk to Rick first," a voice grumbled out behind you.

You spun on your heel, facing a man. Tall, brunette, dark eyes, arms crossed in front of him (strong, you noted), but you could tell in his stance. He was a layer of stone walls, and you did not want to mine.

And then, your eyes smoothed across his back. Is that a fucking crossbow? Sick.

"Whose Rick?" You asked instead, Maggie still holding your arm.

"Whose askin'?"

That, was a good voice. Was your first thought as you turned back around, and your eyes landed on a figure.

Your voice got stuck in your throat.

He was tall, stood like he owned the place (and based on the recommendation, maybe he did), all broad shoulders and strong gaze. Speaking of gaze, he had probably the bluest eyes you'd ever seen. And his hair was brown and curly, a few hung forward on his face. His jaw was unspeakable, and his button-up shirt had a few extra buttons undone to account for the heat. Holy shit.

Maggie elbowed you, and you blinked.

"Uh, me," you answered, clearing your throat -motioning to Glenn, "-he said you had some food and I'm... hungry."

Maggie promptly stomped on your toe. You pressed your lips together trying not to laugh, carefully looking over his face to see if he'd picked up on it at all. Nothing. A shame, really.

Oh well, maybe next time.

"Look, Rick," she interrupted your thoughts, "-I know 'em, really well. Y/N is a good person."

Rick's eyes dipped to you, looking you over. Oh, the words were right there on the tip of your tongue. It would be so easy-

You're trying to survive, Y/N, your mind pressed, focus.

You bit at your lip, but before you could speak for yourself, Glenn did.

"I saw 'em take on a swarm outside," he added, eyes darting to Maggie (Huh.), "-without breaking a sweat."

There are other things I can do without breaking a sweat, your brain immediately remarked, this really was too easy.

Rick seemed to think about it a second, before turning to you, "Ya got a gun?"

I'd like to be loaded with-

"No," you cleared your throat, pulling out your knife (it was one of those multicolored ones, it's why you liked it clean), "-just this."

He hummed, tilting his head with a mouth shrug, "'At's impressive."

I bet your-

You pinched your arm, swallowing, "So, what? Am I in or not?"

Rick's eyes flicked up and down you again (so easy), before he decided, "Ya can stay."

That brings you to now, sitting with Maggie outside with a can of baked beans and a spoon in your hands.

You currently had quite the view of Rick working on the farm, sweat dripping down his brow, strained arms. You'd never thought about farming in that way, but now you were.

"Is his full name Richard?" You asked, curiously.

Maggie turned to you, watching the trail of your eyes to see what you were looking at. She rolled her eyes, "I don't know."

You put a spoonful into your mouth, humming around it, "There's a reason they call them 'Dick', you know."

"Oh my god," she shoved into you -making you laugh a little. You stared down into your can.

"I'm just saying," you stressed, "-he's hot enough for it."

Maggie paused a second, before deciding to say, "His wife died."

"Shit," your smile fell.

"Died in childbirth," she continued, something distant in her eyes -you wondered what exactly it was.

"How long ago?" You asked gently, looking at him in a new light -sympathizing.

"Few months," she answered, a little shortly. You pursed your lips, debating whether to say anything. Or if you even should.

Maggie clarified, herself, "I delivered the baby. Judith, her name is Judith."

"Fuck, Mags," you fully turned to her, putting the can by your feet, "-I'm so sorry."

She took a deep breath in and out, and you wrapped an arm around her shoulders pushing her into your side, "Thanks."

"No problem," you hummed, picking your can back up and letting your eyes drift to Rick again, adding, "-I'm great with babies, you know."

"You're ridiculous," she laughed, taking the bite you offered her.

"What?" You asked, "-Staring isn't bad. He's practically a piece of art, I'm just..."

He turned to the two of you then, blue eyes flickering along your faces -you did not move your gaze at all.

Instead, you gently waved, finishing, "-admiring him."

Rick furrowed his eyebrows for a second, waving back, and then, shaking his head smiling. Count that as a win.

You gnawed at your lip a second, "Do you think he picked up on my 'hungry' thing? I was looking at him and I-"

Maggie laughed, "He definitely did. Everyone did, Y/N, you're shameless."

"It's the apocalypse," you urged, "-who gives a fuck about shame anymore? Rick is hot, and as long as he lets me, I will flirt with him. The more you resist, the more I commit. You remember James in first period?"

She hummed, "I do."

"I chased him for half a year," you continued, swirling the spoon around the can, "-and it worked, didn't it? Guys hardly get properly flattered," your eyes dipped back to him, tone going low, "-I don't mind taking on that duty for the population."

Maggie laughed again, as you just kept your eyes on him. He had dirt on his hands now, wiping at his brow, and just a few curls hung forward on his forehead. God, how did you find him in the apocalypse?

"How valiant," she deadpanned, "-You're a real hero."

"Look, just because you have a type, Glenn, and you bagged him-"

"How did you-"

"Please," you teased, "-he practically ate you earlier with his eyes. Back to my point, I, at least, get to look."

She turned to you, "Ya don't want to date him?"

"Who said that, Mags?" You smirked, turning to her with a smile with eyes that spoke for themselves.

"You know he has kids, right?" She questioned, looking at you.

"So?" you waved the spoon around in your hand, "-Single dads? Hot. Kids? Cute. Where's the loss?"

Maggie looked at you a moment, before shaking her head, "You are clinically insane."

"Maybe," you offered, still watching him, "-but the world's fucked up too. So, at least, I'm not alone."

She laughed really hard at that one, and you felt eyes all over switch to you. Blue ones too. People didn't really seem to laugh around here, so you decided that was your mission too, get people to laugh more. Maybe they could go hand-in-hand.

Time to get to work.

Daryl was sitting across from you, you'd been bugging him for the past few weeks and he'd finally relented. It wasn't easy, but you were nothing if not persistent (hence the Rick situation). Or maybe stubborn. Both? Whatever.

"Daryl, listen," you pointed out, "-you have to take time to load up the bow."

"'At don't mean nothin'," he countered.

"It does," you stressed, explaining, "-in the amount of time it takes you to put in a new arrow, I would have killed at least two."

Daryl rolled his eyes, "It doesn't take 'at long."

"Who said it takes me long to kill two walkers?"

Rick walked by then, and Daryl stopped him.

"Rick, please, take 'em away from me," he spoke out, gruff, but something in you could tell that he wasn't being serious. The guy wasn't half the mystery you expected him to be.

Rick laughed a little at the plea, eyes on you, "What are ya doin' to him?"

"It's not that bad," you laughed, explaining, "-I was just talking about if we were pit against each other to kill the most walkers in a minute. And who would win."

"An' ya want me to help decide?"

"Daryl does," you clarified, "-I am fully confident in my abilities."

Rick laughed a little (another win), "Well, I kno' Daryl's skills, so tell me yours, so it's even."

You bit at your lip, debating. God, it would be so easy. All you had to do was-

"Well," you smiled, playfully, "-I'm told I'm very good with my hands."

He blinked, and it was silent a moment before you heard a snort beside you. You immediately flung to look at him, you had just made Daryl laugh-

"No way," you stressed out, throwing yourself to your feet -pointing at him, "-you just laughed at me."

Daryl pressed his lips together into a thin line, sniffing once, "No, I didn't."

You spun to Rick, and he was already looking at you, you didn't think about it too much.

"Rick," you begged, "-c'mon. I know you and him are like... buddies, but I-"

"Buddies?" He quirked a brow, smiling. Something stirred in your stomach.

"Look, I don't fucking know," you rolled your eyes, "-just agree with me."

He bit down a smile at you, before turning to Daryl, "Ya did laugh at 'em."

"Ha," you cheered, "-I made Daryl Dixon laugh. And, I would win against you."

"He didn't say 'at," Daryl instantly defended.

"Didn't have to, Dixon," you mocked, playfully, "-it's about time management."

"Time management?" Rick questioned curiously.

"Okay, think of this, Rick," you explained, leveling him with your full focus (god he was handsome), "-when you fight with a bow, or a gun for that matter, you have to reload."

He grinned a little at you.

"Follow me, follow me," you hummed, pulling out your knife, "-when you have a physical sort of attack method, like a knife, you don't have that same time issue."

"Ya kinda do though," he interjected.

You paused, looking at him -thoughtfully, "How so?"

"Body's gotta build up energy again," he reasoned (with too much thought for this dumb conversation, smart too? god has favorites), "-Stamina is key to attackin'."

You rolled your lip in between your teeth, he had to be doing this on purpose at this point. Seriously.

"Trust me, sheriff," you spoke -a teeny bit teasing but otherwise very genuine, "-there is no problem with my stamina."

Rick bit back a laugh, turning his head to the side and smiling. You thought you saw a little red on the tips of his ears. Cute. You were unraveling the layers of one Rick Grimes, that was progress.

Daryl didn't even try to hide it that time, letting a gruff chuckle leave his lips, "'M glad I'm not your focus for 'at."

You patted his shoulder, standing up, "It'll be devastating one day, Robin Hood. Don't come crying to me when it is."

"Did ya just call me Robin Hood?"

Rick laughed at that one, head tilting up to the sky. You smiled wide.

"Look at that," you hummed, proud, "-a two for one. Which-"

They both looked at you, but you stuck to your guns. And you smirked a little.

"-honestly, I would not mind," you added -thoughtfully, "-Think about it, and get back to me."

You walked backward a few steps, watching as Rick smiled at you before turning back to fix his gaze on Daryl. Smiling at the ground, you spun on your heel, and went off to find someone else to pester.

You felt a pair of eyes follow you though, and you maybe grinned a little brighter.

Now, you were wandering off on your own. On your own run, you liked to do that sometimes. Maggie nearly had a heart attack because of it, but what damage you did get was usually minor. Except for once, but that wasn't your fault. Well it was, you smashed a window with your fist to see if you could do it. And you could, which was impressive.

Now, you were strolling through an old novelty store -little knick-knacks. Finding some figurines, you grabbed a superhero one and stashed it away. Your eyes caught on a DVD player, the kind for both music and movies, and you picked it up -turning it over in your hands. Battery powered.

On a mission to find both DVDs and some batteries, you roamed through some aisles -particularly a mug one.

Peeking through at some of them, you paused. Taking your pack off and slipping the DVD player into it (along with the few good DVDs you found, no batteries though) on top of some canned food you'd found, you zipped it up. And with a breath, grabbed a mug.

Smiling big, you made your way out of the store.

When you got back to the prison, Maggie was waiting for you -tapping her feet, anxiously. She was a little like a mother, you weren't sure how you felt about it. But you loved her so, you dealt with it.

"Hey Mags," you cheered, mug handle twisted between your fingers.

She instantly relaxed, eyes scanning you over before dropping to the mug. She frowned.

"Please, tell me-"

"I got some food," you sighed, "-I'm not entirely useless."

She pursed her lips, "And the mug?"

You grinned, holding it up for her to see -tapping your fingers along both sides. Her eyes skimmed over it before she frowned (biting back a smile, you could tell).

"Seriously?" She asked.

"What?" You responded, groaning, "-I can't get gifts?"

She shoved into your side, and before you could take too many steps, you were met with your target -leaning against the fence, few steps from Maggie. Was he waiting for you too?

"Rick," you dropping your hands, particularly to avoid him from reading the text, "-what are you doing here?"

"Ya do 'at a lot?" He asked, a little pointedly. You thought you recognized something a little like worry in it, "-Go off on your own?"

Huh.

"Yeah," you laughed a little, "-you haven't noticed? I've been getting like... half the food we have."

Rick hummed (a little in appreciation) before his eyes dropped to your hands, "And what's 'at?"

"A gift," you extended it to him, unflinchingly.

He pulled himself from his spot on the wall, walking forward and accepting it. His fingers (great fingers, really. Was that weird to say?) wrapping around it, you noticed for a second that your fingers brushed -your breath halted a little in place.

"A mug?" He asked looking at you for a second, eyebrows furrowed.

You took your hand, and spun it around in his hands -brushing his skin against yours, "The other side."

He smiled a little, laughing.

Right there on a rather plain mug, were the words '#1 HOT DAD'.

He bit back a smile, eyes peeking up at you again, "Ya really ain't gonna let 'is go, are ya?"

"Nope," you popped the 'p', before clarifying, "-unless you want me to."

Rick licked a line against his teeth, grinning a little with something in his eye, "Who said 'at?"

"Noted," you smiled back, something fluttering in your chest, "-now, where's Carl? I got him something good."

"Ya got him somethin' too?"

He was looking at you a little curiously, like he was seeing new layers of you. You kind of wanted to squirm a little at his gaze. You were not used to people figuring you out.

You sighed, quickly turning your pack to the front and unzipping it. With a breath, you dug around and pulled out the figurine -Rick's eyes caught on it immediately. A small smile creeping along his mouth.

"He told me once he liked comics," you clarified, clearing your throat, "-figured he would like this. You... You think he will?"

"He'll love it," he answered, something new in his eyes, "-C'mon, I'll take ya to him."

On the way there, he seemed to pause a moment, something on his mind. You patiently waited for him to say it.

"'Saw somethin' else in 'ere," he mindlessly remarked, as the mug swung between his fingers "-What is it?"

"Oh," you pulled your pack foward again, excited, extending the figurine to him for safekeeping (he took it with a smile), "-a DVD player."

You held it in your hands, showing to him.

"Found some DVDs, good ones," you continued, before putting it back in your bag, and accepting the figurine back (your fingers brushed again), "-no batteries though."

Rick hummed, pursing his lips like he was thinking about something. He didn't say a word though.

You didn't have much time to think about it, because a few days after that, the prison fell. You'd escaped with Rick and Carl, but you weren't exactly yourself. Not after everything.

There was Judith, and Maggie, and... and Beth and Hershel. Every day felt like there was bile turning in your stomach; every time you closed your eyes, you saw someone... someone dead.

You were lying against the grass, looking up at the stars -it was still so pretty. Despite it all, the sky was still the same. Bright and twinkly. It was when everyone was on the road, wandering for a place to go. You just couldn't sleep, so you took it upon yourself to just look at the sky. You thought the clouds might be pretty, but the night was a little breathtaking.

"Ya awake?"

You didn't say a word.

"C'mon, Y/N, I know ya are."

"Yeah, I am," you sighed, saying shortly, "-Can't sleep."

There was an echo of footsteps, and then you felt body heat beside you. There was a beat.

"Ya ain't gonna say anythin'?" Rick hummed, turning his head to face you.

You matched his eyes (he's probably more handsome now, honestly), "About what?"

"Me, ya know," he motioned, to your side, "-layin' with ya."

You laughed at him a little, before teasing, "Awe, you miss it, don't you, sheriff?"

"Not a sheriff anymore," he hummed, something a little heavy in his voice.

"Eh," you shrugged, looking back to the stars, "-you still are in my mind."

Rick smiled at you, wordlessly.

Before you added, plainly, "Mostly because I love a man in uniform."

He laughed then, big and bright, and you felt something warm in your chest that you knew but hadn't felt in a while.

You wanted to be genuine, really genuine.

"You are a good man, Rick," you turned to look at him, and he looked straight back, "-We've all done shit we never should've, and maybe it's fucked us up a little bit, moved our path in the wrong direction once or twice, but-"

You looked back up to the sky, still feeling his eyes on you. It was kind of like a dream, like the apocalypse wasn't real for a second, just you and Rick. And maybe you wanted that a lot more than you knew.

"-you've got a big heart, Rick," you finished, soundly, "-And even if sometimes you lose sight of what you're doing, or maybe who you are, that... that doesn't change."

Rick didn't say anything for a moment, words echoing out into the night air. You couldn't find it in yourself to regret them, though. You never really regret what you said these days, there was no reason too.

You really only regret what you didn't say. Maybe to people who aren't around anymore. Your heart sunk a little in your chest, but it felt a little lighter -just a smidgen. (Maybe because of who you were with.)

"I got somethin' for ya," Rick suddenly spoke, sitting up (you followed suit).

You furrowed your eyebrows, "You got me something? When?"

Mindlessly, he replied, "On the last run."

You pursed your lips but waited patiently. He moved over to his pack, unzipping one of his pockets and pulling something out -you couldn't quite see. Trying to peek you moved over a little, but nothing.

With a breath, he stood back up and waltzed over to you (somehow he made walking hot, they needed to research that), extending it forward right into your face.

You blinked, gently taking it into your hands and looking at it closely. It was dark so you couldn't really-

Batteries. He handed you a pack of AA batteries.

"No way," you laughed out, "-you remembered that?"

"I remember a lot of what ya say," he offered casually, and you felt something shoot down your spine. And with a breath, he sat right beside you, so close your knees bumped a little.

Pulling your bag over to you, you dug around in it. You'd kept the DVD player and DVDs, not really with the hope of finding batteries. But, to feel a little human, remember life before.

You'd taken to putting stickers on it when you saw any, so the top of it was covered in an assortment. You ran your fingers over it a second, taking it in, before flipping it over. Popping open the little tab, you let out a breath of relief when it was AAs.

Rick laughed.

"I was going to be so pissed if it wasn't," you spoke, "-you have no idea."

He just looked at you then, in a way you'd seen before but never really thought about. You turned back to your bag, shuffling around to find your stash.

"You want music or a movie?"

"Movie's fine," he hummed, and you still felt his eyes trained solely on you. You tried to shake it off.

"Let's see," you pulled out a few of the movies you had, showing them to Rick, "-I've got... a kid's animated movie, or... a... cheesy romcom!"

Rick stared at you, instead of the movies, before flickering to them.

Rambling, you continued, "I also picked up some horror stuff, but I... I really think that was a bad move on my part."

He laughed again, just looking at you in a way you didn't really know how to label. Or react to. You were kind of a little overwhelmed at the fact that he'd even gotten you the batteries, and then the way he was looking at you-

"Think romcom sounds good," he interrupted your thoughts, scanning over you.

"Alright," you acknowledged, putting the other ones up, and scooting back next to him -not enough to touch. It was a little awkward and you weren't sure how you were going to-

"I don't bite ya know," he quipped, laughing a little.

You turned to him, grinning, "Well maybe I do."

Rick laughed again for a moment, just looking at you. And then he extended out an arm, welcoming you into his side.

You paused a moment, before carefully guiding yourself to slot into him; the back of your head against his shoulder, and his arm wrapped around the back of your shoulders. You brought your knees up, to carefully balance the DVD player (shaped like a little laptop really). A tiny little screen for the two of you to see on. Logistically, that's why you were so close but a part of you thought a little otherwise.

"I don't," you hummed.

"What?"

"I don't bite."

He laughed a little, "Good."

"Unless you want me to-"

And the laughter that filled the night was just between you and him. And maybe in the morning, you were fast asleep on his shoulder and maybe he looked at you a little like you were the greatest thing he'd ever seen and maybe he shushed all the others just to have the moment last even a second longer.

You'd never really know.

Now, you were in Alexandria. You'd gotten Maggie back, you'd gotten Judith back. You were on a new high, and that meant two things. More pestering, and two, flirting with Rick.

You were walking through Alexandria with Maggie, just keeping her on her feet really. She wasn't super pregnant yet, and it was good to be healthy.

"I cannot believe you're pregnant," you mindlessly remarked, holding Judith close to your side.

"I have been," she retorted, "-for a while. Think ya have had time to digest it."

"But, it's like physical proof that you fucked," you commented, "-unprotected, by the way. I know you missed that sex-ed day, but seriously-"

"Carl's proof that Rick fucked," Maggie defended, eyes smoothing over him with a few of his friends.

"Well," you pursed your lips, "-I know that Rick fucked. Just on principle, he's-"

She motioned for you to zip it, "Don't start. I know you are doin' good, which is great. But it also means ya become a lil' unbearable."

"Me? Unbearable?" You turned to Judith, cooing a little, "-Can you believe the nerve of her, Jude?"

Judith smiled at you with her big brown eyes and toothless little mouth. You pinched her cheek, instinctively, "So cute."

"I still can't believe that you're in love with Ri-"

"I told you that in confidence," you interrupted, pointed.

Maggie stuck out her tongue at you and Judith laughed a little at it. Funny faces, right. You could physically see the pregnancy hormones on her face as she cooed at Judith.

You would've said something, but you had just done it yourself.

"Where's your keeper anyway?" You hummed like you'd been stuck with her (you actively searched her out).

"'E's not my keeper," she responded, sternly (mom voice, already?), "-and he's out on run, gettin' supplies."

"If he's not your keeper, how'd you know who I was talking about?"

"You are so-"

Before she could finish such a kind sentence, the two of you were interrupted. A presence waltzing up to your side.

You turned to look who, and-

Your heart lept into your throat. It was Rick, now clean-shaven, and although, you had loved the beard (don't even get you started), his jaw was on full display. Blue, blue eyes. And dipping to his clothes, he was in a damn uniform.

"Look at you, Rick," you complimented, smiling.

"'Heard ya liked a man in uniform," he smiled (a new type of way), and winked. And before you could say a word, he walked forward -past you.

You stuttered to a stop, Maggie right beside you. Blinking you turned to her, and she looked right back at you. And then you both turned to look at Rick, still walking the same way he was.

Turning back forward, you opened your mouth, "Sorry, did that just happen?"

Maggie hummed, pulling you with her, "It did."

"How did I never think of that?"

"Think of what?" She offered, as you smoothed back into a step with her.

You answered, eyebrows furrowing, "That he might flirt back."

She shrugged, "If it helps, I never thought he would."

"I am not against shoving a pregnant woman," you hissed back, with no bite. You never really had any. And you both broke into laughter, as you roamed through Alexandria.

Now, Daryl was leaning against a house as you stood beside him -pestering as always.

"No, listen," you turned to him, attentively, "-it's called fuck, marry, kill-"

"I ain't playing it with ya."

"C'mon, Daryl, it's fun, look-" you flagged down Glenn (who was carrying a box, of what, who knows?), "-Glenn, fuck, marry, kill. Michonne, Carol, and Daryl."

"Easy," he laughed, "-fuck Michonne, marry Carol, and sorry, dude, but kill Daryl."

"See?" You motioned to Glenn, as he walked forward.

"Don't ya 'ave a wife?" Daryl remarked, as Glenn moved along.

"Oh please," you shook your hand dismissively, "-it's all just fun. Just hypothetical scenarios."

"Okay, now," you started over, "-fuck, marry, kill. Deanna-"

"Kill," he answered -unflinchingly.

"See!" you cheered, "-you're getting the hang of it-"

"What are the two of ya doin'?"

You turned to see the one and only Rick Grimes, a little more worn today, which you kind of preferred, still had those bandaids on (how did he make that look hot?), and more casually dressed. In the white t-shirt, we trust.

"I'm teaching Daryl how to play fuck, marry, kill," you answered, eyes solid on him, "-obviously."

Before he could respond, Daryl chimed up, something mischievous in his eyes. You squinted at him, trying to figure it out. And then he opened his mouth.

"I got one," he spoke, a smile teasing on his lips (looking at Rick, directly), "-Y/N, Glenn, and Rosita."

You stared at the eye contact for a moment (everything was so suspicious), before asking, "What am I supposed to do with myself?"

Daryl shrugged, you bit your lip a second.

"I guess I could kill myself, big waste, but-" you paused, "-ooh, wait, I could, like, clone situation fuck myself-"

"Now, 'at would be a sight to see," a low southern drawl interrupted your words, and your voice faltered to a stop.

You turned to him, squinting at him for a second -trying to understand. All he did was wink at you again, and you hated that it made your knees a little wobbly. Especially when he was holding onto the column of the porch, and slightly leaning toward you-

"Before I was so rudely interrupted," you cleared your throat, "-I would marry Glenn, fuck Rosita, and, tragically, kill myself."

Daryl nodded his head, before motioning to Rick, "What 'bout ya?"

"Am I playin'?" He questioned, finger pointing to himself and eyes dashing to you.

"Might as well," you shrugged, "-you're already over here."

He pursed his lips a second like he was thinking, eyes particularly avoiding you, "An' I can't choose one person for two of 'em?"

You swallowed, oh, he was playing dirty.

"Nope," Daryl answered.

And then, he turned into something much softer, something more familiar, "Then, marry Y/N, fuck Rosita, and kill Glenn."

Marry?

Your heart lept into your throat, and your fingers started fidgeting with your shirt -instinctively. How the hell was he winning? I started this game-

"Thought so," Daryl responded.

And out of the corner of your eye, you saw Carol. Her eyes matched yours a second, and you tried to convey how desperate you were to get away from this very scene. Her eyebrows furrowed for a second, but then she spoke.

"Hey, Y/N! Can you come help me with the food?"

"Of course, Carol," you called back, smiling at the two of them, "-sorry, duty calls."

Rick just grinned at you then, like he knew exactly what you were doing. And you were 100% sure he did. Stupid handsome men with stupidly beautiful blue eyes. Ignoring the fact that you physically brushed against him to get off the porch, you frantically caught up to Carol.

You were in the pantry now, gathering ingredients, Carol directing you -naming them as she found them.

"So," she looked at you, "-are you gonna tell me what that was about?"

You pursed your lips, before answering, "Rick's flirting back with me."

Carol raised her eyebrows at you, "Huh."

"And I was teaching Daryl how to play fuck, marry, kill, and he-" you rapted your fingernails along one of the cans, "-and he said he'd marry me. But all... genuine and shit."

"And that's bad?"

"No, no," you shook your head, putting the can into a basket, "-It's not bad. Just... I don't know if he means it."

"You just said that he said it genuinely," Carol pointed out, grabbing another can.

"Well yeah, but-" you scrambled a moment, "-all that time ago, I was flirting genuinely. I mean even though it was playful, it was still genuine."

"And," she connected the dots, "-you're not sure if he's genuine?"

"Yeah," you skimmed along the shelves, gathering the last can she needed.

"Well," she took it from your hand, blue eyes on you softly, "-if it's worth anything, I think he's genuine. And maybe this is his way of showing how he feels about you."

You hummed, wordlessly.

"He's let you flirt with him this long," she continued, bringing a hand up to your shoulder, "-that has to mean something, doesn’t it?"

She had a point.

"Now," she adjusted the basket, "-are you actually going to help me with the food? Or was it just an excuse to run away from Rick?"

You laughed, "I'll help, I'll help. I'm not a total dick. Speaking of-"

She turned to you.

"Do you know if Rick's full name is Richard?"

It was a few weeks later, and they were filled with frustratingly blue winks. And that was one thing, but now you were being stupid. You were stupid.

You'd thought Oh, it'll be just like old times, I'll go out on a run. It'll be so nice-

And now you were walking with a gunshot would, quickly bandaged by a rip of your t-shirt and whatever you had around you. Which in whatever the hell store it was, was not a lot. All you'd managed to find was alcohol so you at least soaked the shirt.

You'd blearily walked all the way home, eyes foggy, and praying that a walker wouldn't come near you. And now you saw it, Alexandria.

"Gabriel," you called, breathlessly, "-Gabriel, please let me in."

You heard him say something but you were delirious. Maybe something with your name? Head fuzzy and eyes bleary, you were coming down from the high of getting somewhere safe. As you waltzed into Alexandria (pain in the abdomen so hot it almost felt numbing), there was a swarm of people around you immediately. Felt like you were back in the prison, when Maggie would be waiting and you think she was now.

"Hey, hey," she chanted, grabbing your face (and you could see her now), "-look at me, Y/N, tell me what the hell happened."

"Some guy, the bitch," you muttered out, a little slurred you think, "-just shot me, because he wanted the last of the damn Campbell soup, who shoots someone for Campbell soup?"

Her eyes dropped to your body, you mindlessly noted that it was sticky. Your eyes dropped too, and saw all the red -so much red.

"I think I lost a lot of blood, Mags."

"Somebody go get Rick, and the doctor, now," she shouted (loud, loud), before turning back to you, "-How the hell did you get here?"

"I walked," you answered simply.

"You walked?" She responded, hands on your shoulders, "-How did you-"

You were safe now, and everything in your body just gave out.

"Adrenaline is a hell of a drug," you hummed, laughing a little, before falling to the ground.

Your head stung from the ground, as Maggie tried to get down by your side -all pregnant belly.

"'S okay, Mags, don't-" you mumbled "-don't hurt yourself."

She frowned, and you thought she might have tears in her eyes, "I have to stay with you, Y/N, whose going to keep you awake-"

"Glenn," you called, and you saw him saunter up to your side, a little slurred, "-take care of 'er, help her sit. Don't worry, Mags, don't worry-"

You heard a slap of footsteps then, quick and brisk, and before you could wonder who, blue eyes and rough hands were guiding your face. He was starting to grow his stubble back, you mindlessly noted.

"Rick," you smiled a little fuzzily, reaching up and patting his face, "-See Mags, Rick'll take care of me."

"Hey, hey," he brought your focus to him, "-keep lookin' at me, okay?"

"Well," you slurred a little, "-'at's not very hard, sheriff."

He turned to the crowd then, voice low and gruff, "What the hell happened?"

You heard Maggie respond then, through sobs, "'Ey said that some guy shot 'em, over a... over some food."

"Didn't even ask if he could have 'em, first. Who does that-"

"Daryl," he motioned -tone low, and he immediately nodded. You watched him leave your eyesight.

Rick instead, brought your face back to him, as you recognized the doctor to be by your side, scrambling with some white stuff.

"Hey, hey, baby," he spoke, low in a whisper, "-I'm 'ere, focus on me. Look at me."

You smiled again, delirious, "You called me baby, that feels nice. Everythin' else burns-"

"I kno', I kno'," he soothed, you felt pressure on your abdomen (hissing in pain, as your eyes got more blurry), "-ya did a good job gettin' back 'ere. To where you're safe. Ya did a good job."

"Just kept walking," you slurred, "-couldn't stop. Wasn't gonna die to some asshole."

Rick laughed then a little, and you felt something a little different than pain. Your hands naturally came to his face, mindlessly rubbing your thumbs against his cheekbones. He's always been so handsome, only gets better with time.

You noticed he leaned into it a little, careful not to hurt you. Yeah, you realized, he was genuine.

God, what if you had missed out on this, with Rick? All because of some stupid can of soup-

"Rick," you started, and he looked at you a little like you held the world, you were the world maybe, "-I think I'm gonna die."

"You're not, no-" he held his hand over yours (it was so warm. Why had you never held his hand?), "-You're not gonna die, baby. You're gonna be fine."

"I'm bleeding," you breathed out, scanning over him, "-Been bleeding the whole time. You're not supposed to bleed that much, Rick."

"Ya ain't gonna die," he repeated, hands gathering your face, "-Look at me, ya ain't dyin'."

Concern clear on his face, you felt the urge to soothe, soothe, soothe-

You looked at him, eyes scanning over his face. He was handsome, yeah, but he was caring, smart, and so, so kind. You wanted to tell him that, see what he'd say. What he'd do.

"'Said that you were a good man, 'at you have a big heart," you hummed, eyes languidly blinking, "-still mean it. Don't you forget it."

He looked at you for a second, eyes flicking all over your face, before looking to the doctor. She must've said something (your ears felt stuffy) because then Rick was picking you up. He was everywhere, smell, sight. All you could feel was Rick, body heat thrumming and blooming into your side.

"Always knew you were strong," you mindlessly remarked.

You felt Rick laugh in his chest, and your eyelids were so heavy then. You slowly began blinking, your brain slowing down. Maybe you could close your eyes just for a little bit.

"Got so much to say to ya."

And then, it all faded to black.

This blanket is scratchy as hell, you mindlessly remarked. It was almost like a thin sheet, barely coating you, and you think if you moved your arms, it would make that noise that shitty bedsheets did. Why were hospital beds so bad? Shouldn't they be comfortable?

And then your nose was hit with the heavy sterilized air. You scrunched your nose up on instinct, it made your throat burn-

"Y/N? Darlin'?"

You slowly blinked your eyes open, heavy and languid; they always had those florescent lights too. How was that helpful?

"'S too fucking bright in here."

You heard him laugh a little, maybe in relief mostly, and you blearily blinked to get a look at him.

"'D turn it down for ya if I could."

You laughed a little and squinted your eyes open, laying gently on him. He looked a little worse for wear, his hair messy and shirt a little crooked. You wanted to fix his curls back in place, and your hand moved before you could stop it.

Gently, you threaded his hair back. He was a breath away from where you laid, so it wasn't too far of a reach.

Rick looked at you so softly, that the words cut off your from your lips. And with a breath, he pulled your hand down from his hair, sliding it against his cheek. Before you could say a word about it, he turned his head and gently kissed your palm.

You bit at your lip, eyes flickering over him, "How long have you been here?"

"Since the doc' allowed me to be," he answered, fidgeting with your hand -not really wanting to let go, you guessed.

"And Mags?" You asked, concern flickering through your eyes, "-Are she and the baby okay?"

"Yeah," he looked at you, a little in disbelief, "-they're alright. She was stressed, yeah, but Glenn kept 'er calm."

"And," your eyes darted to your abdomen, where your wound now hid, "-the wound?"

"Good," he replied, eyes swimming over you like he couldn't quite believe you were okay, "-Doc' says ya just need to rest, not irritate the stitches. Which I kno' will be hard for ya."

You sighed, leaning your head back onto the bed, looking up at the ceiling, "I am going to be so bored."

Rick chuckled a little, before falling suspiciously quiet. You turned to him, just to see him looking down and fidgeting with your hand -a little like he was working on saying something. You simply waited.

"'Ve been looking for those batteries since ya said ya wanted 'em," he spoke, a little quietly.

You froze, "Since the prison?"

"Yeah," he offered, "-apparently 'ey're a hot commodity."

"Why?" You questioned, looking at him curiously, "-Why all that work for some batteries?"

"Because," he hummed simply, eyes matching yours now, "-ya wanted 'em."

You pushed your lips into a thin line, the glimmer of hope sparking in your chest. Not saying a word, you just stared at him for a second; not unlike in the early days, you were just admiring him for a lot more than his (still unbelievably handsome) face.

"Y/N, I-" he started, eyes dipping back down to your hands. He seemed to pause a moment, debating.

And then he looked up at you, eyes set in his path -unflinchingly. In a sort of understanding, like everything made sense to him now. The silence was heavy until he leaned forward and brushed his hand along your cheek -carefully. It made you feel precious, and your eyes maybe got a little cloudy because of it.

"I'm in love with ya," he let out a breath, tone heavy and genuine, "-an... and the way ya blatantly hit on me but in the damn most genuine type of way."

You laughed a little and leaned gently into his palm. He looked at you in a way you couldn't label then, or maybe you could (love), and rubbed his thumb along your cheekbone.

"I didn't know how to react to it, at first," he hummed, something settled in his eyes, "-the attention ya gave me. 'S somethin' I've never dealt with before."

"Really?" You let slip past your lips, and his grin grew wide as he let his head fall and shook it, smiling at the ground.

"Even now," he laughed a little, turning his gaze up again, "-ya always said thin's like it was so easy to do. Like ya were tellin' me 'at the sun was hot."

"You did give me some pretty good set ups," you clarified, smiling at him.

"'Never meant to," he added, grinning a little in wonder, "-I couldn't think straight when ya said 'em, so I'm surprised I even did."

You hummed, eyes twinkling at him and he looked at you just a little more like he was in love. It made a spark shoot down to your toes, warmth flooding your chest.

"If it's worth anything," you spoke, a little embarrassed, "-my brain stops working when you do the fond thing."

"The fond thing?"

"It's just," you sighed, trying to articulate, "-It's a way that you look at me, or... or smile at me. When you do the soft stuff."

"What exactly is-" he hummed, gently, holding your attention like your words really mattered, "-'the soft stuff'?"

"Uh," you blew a raspberry with your lips, "-like giving me the batteries, and... and that whole conversation actually."

"Oh," he laughed a little, blue eyes twinkling, "-like I was in love with ya."

"What? No, you weren't... not that early-"

And then you looked at him.

"Shit," you marveled, "-really?"

"Like I said," he smiled at you, a little like you were cute, "-I looked for those batteries for months. For ya. An'-"

His face got a little more serious.

"-I really missed ya. 'At was probably when I first realized it."

You rolled your lip inbetween your teeth, "Yeah?"

"Ya used to make everybody laugh, and were always smilin'-" he explained, "-it wasn't even just the flirtin', it was just... I knew ya were hurtin', an' I couldn't help. Or I... I didn't know what to do to help."

You just stared.

"An' I missed ya so desperately, I just-" he let out a breath, "-It all clicked into place, and I went on 'at run, hopin' to god there were batteries-"

You laughed a little weepily, leaning into his hand.

"-because I just wanted to make ya feel better. Bring ya back to me."

"How the hell did you even find them?" You questioned, wiping at your eyes, "-It couldn't have been that lucky."

"'Wasn't," he replied simply, "-I was only supposed to do a few stores, I did the whole strip."

"God, really?" You smiled, "-For batteries?"

"No," he hummed, simply, "-for ya."

You fell quiet.

"I would do anythin' for ya," he added, voice a little breathless, "-anythin'."

"Anything?"

Rick laughed a little, grin bright, "Ya need to rest, baby."

"That's not a no," you chimed, grinning.

He looked at you a certain type of way then, "'S definitely not a no."

You felt your heart pound in your chest for a moment. That was something to look forward to. Something stirred in your stomach.

"What?" He asked, teasing, "-Ya all bark and no bite, hmm?"

"If I wasn't bedridden," you spoke flatly, "-I would kick your ass."

"Ya would," he agreed.

And you laughed, eyes smoothing over his face. Before noticing something you hadn't quite said yet.

Words fell out of your lips, "Even though you probably already know, because I've chasing you all this time-"

He smiled at you.

"-I love you too," you finished, "-if it wasn't obvious."

"'Was kinda obvious," he leveled -teasing, but something was sparkling so bright in his eyes that you didn't really mind.

"Yeah, yeah," you moved your hand dismissively, "-don't start, sheriff."

You paused for a moment, eyes dancing along the room, "Do I get to go home today?"

"No," he spoke, with a certainty that shook through your bones (this man had literally everything), "-'Need to be taken care of, so ya are stayin' wit' me until you're healed."

You blinked at him, he was doing the fond thing again. Your mind relaxed to a low hum.

"Maybe after too," he added, tone softer but not any less certain, "-if ya want."

You stared at him, wordless.

Rick blinked, looking at you, before grinning, "'At the fond thing?"

"Yeah," you cleared your throat, embarrassed, "-I don't... It's been a long time since I've been cared for. At all. And you're a very handsome man offering to-"

"Not offerin'," he clarified, eyes set on yours, "-just doin'. 'Specially now, 'cause I kno' ya love me too."

All headstrong, decisive, and certain. How was this happening to you?

"'Thought you said it was obvious?"

"It was," he hummed, grinning at you, "-I could just barely wrap my head around ya flirtin' with me. Couldn't really see it."

You thought for a second, before speaking, "Was it Daryl?"

He grinned at you, tilting his head a little, "Maybe."

"Always knew he was a big softie," you hummed, "-read him like a book when we first met. Stone layers to an ooey-gooey center."

Rick scrunched up his nose, "Ooey-gooey center?"

"Sometimes," you sighed, "-Sometimes I say stupid shit around really attractive people. It's a habit."

"'Guess 'at means you're still gonna be flirting with me?"

"As long as you want me to, sheriff," you clarified.

"So maybe forever then," he grinned and you felt your heart leap into your chest (fuck his fond things). You were totally never getting over that.

"Yeah," you hummed in agreement, "-Maybe forever then."

Mission accomplished.

#rick grimes #rick grimes x reader #its griming time #stuff n' thangs #rick grimes x you #rick grimes x y/n #ricky dicky doo dah grimes #twd #twd rick #rick grimes x y/n fanfiction #rick grimes oneshot

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carlyraejepsans · 11 months

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Rate UT characters on likely they are to eat spoiled food

premise: as monster food does not spoil, this speculation is based on how i think they'd treat human food in the post pacifist ending

frisk. trash burger. enough said. (also i hc that they grew up on the streets, so... not a lot of chances to be picky with your food.)

sans. second most likely. there's milk in the fridge bought specifically for him to drink out of the carton whenever frisk's or papyrus' friends come to visit, like a stereotypical disney channel older brother (he loves being annoying on purpose). it's been there for a month. he's still not done with it. it's probably rancid. enjoyer of food and lover of even shittier food. mr worst burger on the menu. he is ESPECIALLY gross about food and he is gross about it on purpose, he will peel an apple for papyrus and then take a bite out of it before cutting him a slice. and then call him a wuss when he acts disgusted. ("stop being a baby bones, we have the same germs anyway" "NO WE DON'T. *YOU* HAVE GERMS! AND I DON'T WANT ANY OF THEM!!" "why? they're pedigreed" "OUGH!?!!"). he mostly uses it as a chance to make a gag (or a lack of gagging, lol) but his strong stomach did also come in handy in the early days of papyrus' interest in cooking

mettaton, of sequins-and-glue hamburgers fame. he's technically tied for 2nd place with sans, but i put him in third because i feel like sans does it on purpose, for mettaton it's more like... a side effect of starting life off as a ghost. few people question it since he's a robot now.

alphys. she doesn't go out of her way to do it, but she buys her snacks in industrial pallet-fuls to reduce social interactions to a minimum, so by the time she reaches the last 3 or 4 packets of blue takis, they're well past their expiration date. not that it stops her. now, this wouldn't happen on the surface because she gets better and has a solid support system, but if monster food could spoil back when she was going Through it with the amalgamates, i feel like she'd either be too depressed or tired to care and eat it, or she'd tumble into a "g-god. you can't even take care of your own f-food. is there anything you can't fuck up" self-deprecation spiral and lose her appetite altogether

flowey. did it to see what would happen. nothing did. never did it again. tbh I just don't think he eats much of anything, spoiled or not.

undyne. getting into the "wouldn't eat spoiled food" tier. she actually thinks it's really gross but papyrus tricks her into doing it by challenging her machismo. she gets SO sick from it. they do this aprox 3 times a month. rinse and repeat

asgore. he's a gardener, and i can see him working in a community garden on the surface, so he'd have access to a lot of fresh produce, for both himself and to give away. however, if some of it were to go bad, he'd probably cut off the affected bit and eat the rest so it doesn't go to waste.

toriel. she is SUPER careful about expiration dates and mold and checks to make sure all she owns is still safe to eat almost weekly. this level of care, however, is mostly meant for other people, not herself, but she would really rather not eat anything that's gone bad. same reasoning as alphys', IF monster food could spoil when she was still in the RUINs, i could technically see her biting the bullet, if only because 1) she was also heavily depressed and struggling to take care of herself, though i think she might sooner skip out on the meal altogether, rather than eat something spoiled, and 2) the awkward stares from the other monsters in the RUINs supermarket might not be something she's willing to deal with on any given day.

papyrus. he would NOT. no way. master of cleaning, germophobe extraordinaire papyrus (well, not really, but he plays the part). if toriel is meticulous, papyrus is obsessive. there better not be a SINGLE spot on his food. and no lines or plaid patterns either!! he WILL wash it untill it goes away. with soap probably. canonically a picky eater to begin with (his picks are just weird as balls). can should and WILL get on sans' ass about his unhealthy eating habits, and that includes eating food that's gone bad.

#answered asks #undertale #sans #papyrus #toriel #frisk #alphys #undyne #asgore #mettaton #hey look the whole gang is here!

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aloesarchives · 3 months

Text

The Echoes from Yesterday: "The Ghost of His Yesterday: Her" (Toji Fushiguro x Fem!Reader) (1/3)

TW/Warnings: Female Reader/Pronouns, Profanity, Pure Angst, Angst No Happy Ending, Minor Character Death Mentioned, Toji cannot cope, Reader Highkey Hurting

Pairing: Toji x Fem!Reader, Megumi x Fem!Reader(Platonic/Parental)

Reader/Pronouns: She/Her

Word Count: 9.09k words

[!!Edited and Proofread as of 3/13/2024 6:35 pm CST!!]

Love isn’t the easiest thing in the world.

But you were unaware how loving a broken man would be onerous. A decision that would lead to an immense heartache, something you failed to realize until it was too late.

You knew he was still mourning her, and rightfully so. She was his first and only love, the only woman he ever gave his heart towards.

You weren’t asking for much. You didn’t want to replace her. No, never in a million years. You only hoped wished Toji would allow you to love him. To make space in his heart. To have a chance of slowly laying his heart open like he had done before with her.

Unfortunately it never came, not once during the duration of five years being together.

You meet Toji by chance at the supermarket store not too far from your residence. You never paid much attention to him until he brought a 5 month old baby boy. He was a silent but curious little one with his green eyes looking at anything.

Funny enough, the baby boy named Megumi was the reason you and his father even interacted. It was a random day where you were in the fresh meat section, looking at the deals they had for the day. You were focused on finding what you needed when a small gurgle snapped you out of your trance.

You glanced over to the little cherub looking up at you, smiling with his two bottom teeth barely showing. You gave a warm smile with a small wave his way. This made Megumi more giddy and vocal as he let out a few babbling giggles. You let out a soft chuckle seeing him bouncing in his seat while flailing his arms. The jingle of his teething ring followed his movements until it slipped out of his chubby hands. You were quick to catch it, hating to see him sad.

Handing it back to him, you were caught off-guard when he grabbed your hand. His attention was now off the toy and onto you. Megumi held onto you as he smiled like the little cherub he was. You, however, were a little concerned when realizing his father was out of sight. As cute as Megumi was, you didn’t want to cause trouble with his dad for interacting with you. Just as Megumi loosen his grip, you heard a low chuckle behind you.

“Megumi, you’re in a better mood now than earlier. Is it because you’re bothering her?”

That’s when you meet him, the towering man who also was the father of the little baby that caught your attention. His eyes met yours and something in your heart flickered. He was attractive, a glaring observation. But the way his grin highlighted the scar on his right side of his lips caught your attention.

“Sorry about my son, Miss. He’s a little troublemaker and a rascal.”

You playfully snickered at his harmless insult for Megumi.

“It’s fine. He’s quite the cute baby. I don’t mind the trouble at all.”

You don’t remember the details of that small interaction. But you knew you would see both of them again. Surprisingly, Toji walked you to your car. Although you thanked him, your wandering eyes caught a glimpse of gold on his left finger.

‘Oh…’

You knew better than to mess with marriages and have affairs. But you felt disappointed knowing Toji is married. But hey, he treated you nicely and respectfully. So maybe you could be an acquaintance or even a friend if you’re lucky. It was a weekly encounter with the man and his son, always having small talk while you entertained Megumi. Weeks turned into a month, then a month became six months.

After some time, you grew comfortable around them as you always looked forward to seeing them each week. But you noticed a key detail that felt off: where’s Toji’s wife? The mother of Megumi, where is she?

You thought she was working or a very busy woman. So during one of your weekly interactions, you asked Toji about the whereabouts of his wife. The question was meant to be harmless, you didn’t mean to pry. But the change in Toji’s face and his body going stiff showed you’ve crossed a line.

“Oh, I’m sorry, Toji! I didn’t mean to be nosy about your personal life! If it’s a sensitive topic, you can drop it and I’ll never bring it up again.”

Toji knew it was the only matter of time before you asked the question. More so, he’s anticipating your reaction to his answer more than your question itself. The guilt washing over you seeing the tall well-built man deflate in front of you. His callous hand slowly rubbed his face, pondering at the question that you threw into the open. He sighs before facing you, seeing your face full of shame and embarrassment.

“Toji, you don’t have to. I was out of line for–”

“No…No it’s fine, (Y/N). It’s just…I can’t really talk about something like that here. If we were in private, I can give the answer to your question. You free tomorrow?”

As much as shutting down Toji’s invitation would’ve brought your dignity back, something inside told you to go through with it. And so you agreed to it.

“I am, are you okay with noon? The weather is doable around that time and I don’t want to make Megumi sick. There’s this cafe where we can meet up. It's hidden in one of the side streets and has privacy booths if that's okay with you. You want me to send the address to you?”

“Yeah… That’ll be great, (Y/N).”

He relaxes in your gaze but it feels like you trespassed onto treacherous waters. The next day, you waited for Toji outside the cafe. Frequently looking between your phones and the busy street of people to see any sign of the duo. Before you dial his number, you spotted the familiar gray jacket and a stroller heading your way.

You waved in his direction to catch his attention which worked because his gaze connected with yours. You smiled at him as he made his way over before peaking in the stroller to see a baby Megumi sleeping, covered in his puppy baby blanket. You walk inside and a server already takes you to a secluded booth. You ordered your drinks ahead of time and they were ready once you sat down. Toji’s drink is easy, straight up black coffee with no sugar or creamer.

The two of you talked for a bit. Well, you were beating around the bush from yesterday's topic. Taking your anxiety by the throat, you finally had the guts to repeat your question from yesterday. Your abruptness didn’t startle Toji as he took a good sip. His answer was unexpected, one which was dreadful than his assumed replies you thought of.

“My wife died last year…She had an unknown illness the doctors couldn’t figure out even though they tried everything. But it was catching up to her faster than the doctors could work. Megumi was only barely 3 months old when she passed away…”

You didn’t know what to do. Yes, you wanted to comfort Toji but you didn’t know what to say. By the looks of things, it’s just him and his son. He has no other support from families on both sides. No friends either to lean on. You're probably his only friend he’s ever made. He was a single dad trying to take care of his son after the sudden death of his wife. But you were empathetic to him, Megumi, and their situation. You offered to help him out with Megumi, not out of pity but out of compassion.

“If it’s okay with you, I can help you out with Megumi. My work hours are short and early in the morning. That’s why I’m always available after 12:00 pm. I’m off during the weekends too. It wouldn’t be much of an inconvenience to me at all…You need help raising Megumi, Toji…”

His lips form into a sneer momentarily before returning to a straight line.

“Was it that obvious, (Y/N)?”

Carefully, you selected your words to not sound patronizing towards him.

“No…It wasn’t, at first. But after what you just told me…I think you need some extra hands to deal with this. It wouldn’t hurt to ask for help, Toji…”

He really didn’t want to…He knew you’re a kind individual when he laid eyes on you. You were different to him, being good-natured…something that was awfully similar to how his late wife was like, especially how you treated him when you two first met. He couldn’t let you be dragged into his own shortcomings as a father. You were young, 23 to be precise. You had a future ahead of you, you couldn’t slow it down for a single dad and his kid. Yet here you are, offering your help to him with no form of repayment whatsoever. It was genuine too, he could feel it when you offered a soft tender smile towards him.

He grins and allows you to help him and his son out. Though your smile didn’t change, he felt his heart rate doubled when your eyes became soft like your smile. You two left the cafe and walked along the city. Cutting through a nearby park, the two of you were in a conversation as the park’s flora were in the early stage of blossoming. You two didn’t get far as you heard some rustling coming from the stroller. Pausing your conversation, you and Toji looked inside to see Megumi stir himself awake. He slowly rubs his eyes as he sits up. Still rubbing the sleep out his eyes, he let out a whine causing Toji to stop. You raise an eyebrow observing Toji as he picks up Megumi. Then, from a whine came a small sniffle, the sniffle turned into a small sob. You watched Toji comfort a crying Megumi. Rocking him in his arms and rubbing his head gently.

Yet nothing was working to calm Megumi. By instinct alone, you wanted to comfort Megumi. Yet, you felt hesitation take over. Reeling back and forth between your two emotions, you decided to step in and hold out your hands towards Toji. The man gave you a strange look before slowly handing you his son. Once in your arms, Megumi’s crying had slowed to a stop. As you held him in your arms, you slowly rubbed his back while humming. Toji never admitted out loud but seeing how his son calmed down in your arms made his heart erupt into a feeling he wasn’t so used to.

From then on, you helped Toji out with raising Megumi. It was some work but you didn’t mind it at. Picking up Megumi from school, watching him when Toji was away or busy, running errands for Toji, and helping around their apartment, etc. You soon learned he was a quiet baby. Besides the occasional crying, he was silent for the most part when he wasn’t excited. You also noticed he’s only happy when he’s around either you or Toji. Showing it through his little baby ways, making you become attached and affectionate of Megumi. It only grew as you watched Megumi grow up.

Over time, taking care of Megumi became a part of your routine and eventually life. You grew fond and close with him. Though it was unofficial, it felt as if he was your own son. During that time, you and Toji grew close as well. A year into your involvement in his and his son’s life, you ask Toji if he liked you. To which he responded with “Yeah…Actually, I like you a lot, (Y/N)...” At the time, you felt relieved that your feelings were mutual. Seemingly the next 5 years with him and Megumi would be bliss. But that should’ve been the first sign something was up.

Although you’re not one for paranoia, you felt things between you and Toji were off as the years passed. There were little things here and there like not always holding your hand outside, lack of nicknames, and curt answers when you ask him about his day when he comes home. But you concluded it was your tendency to overthink.

However, everything changed when Megumi called you Mama. He had just turned four when he said it. Normally, he would call you “(Y/N)-san” when he’s with you. You were waiting for him as usual on the day it happened. And on the dot, you see Megumi come out with his teacher with a piece of paper in his hand. You walk up to them to retrieve Megumi from his teacher but Megumi starts to fiddle with his paper, which worries you a bit.

“Megumi, why don’t you show her what you made today in class? I think she would love it.”

His teacher gave him an encouraging smile that pushed Megumi to show you what he drew. It was a picture of three stick figures. One had a scar on the line that you assumed was the lips, a smaller one that looks like Megumi, then another that looked like you.

“Aw, Megumi. Did you draw us?”

“Yeah, because you’re Mama, (Y/N)!”

You didn’t know a child could bring such warmth and a feeling of belonging, but Megumi did. You open your arms and he goes in without hesitation. You hug him tightly before patting his head.

“Thank you, Megumi. I love it. Let’s go home now, we have to get groceries for dinner.”

Megumi nods before saying bye to his teacher. You allowed him to talk your ear off as you got ingredients for dinner. You were in a good mood, indulging him as he talked about what he did in school. Coming to their home, you got to work with dinner while Megumi did his homework on the living room table. Once Toji’s home, dinner was ready and Megumi put his school bag away, leaving out his drawing. After eating and cleaning up, you finish washing the dishes when Toji comes into the kitchen looking at the paper in his hand. It was Megumi’s drawing from school.

“Megumi drew this, (Y/N)?”

“Yeah, he drew it during school. He showed it to me when he picked it up. It’s pretty sweet of him. He was so excited to show me.”

Drying your hands on the towel nearby, the kitchen became awfully silent. You turned to Toji and see him still looking down at Megumi’s drawing. Yet, his hand started crippling the paper. Sensing his change in mood, you went up to him to see if everything was okay. You placed a comforting hand on his arm but he jolted his arm to move it off. Surprised by his action, you tried to meet his eyes. Once he did, they were filled with anger. He looks back and forth between you and his son’s drawing. It looked as if he wanted to say something but his clenched teeth prevented anything from coming out. He lets go of the drawing, letting it fall on the ground before turning on his heels to go into his bedroom.

“I need to calm down, (Y/N)...I had a rough day… Just give me space and don’t come into my room.”

You would've protested, but he was fast and left the kitchen instantly. You slowly kneeled to look at Megumi’s picture, a pain throbbed inside your heart when you saw how much the paper was crumpled by Toji’s death grip. Your pain continues with a mix of worry as Megumi’s drawing of you with the title of ‘Mama’ above was creased the most. You calmed yourself down by taking a deep breath, unconsciously holding the picture close. You made sure the kitchen was clean before going into Megumi’s room. The moonlight peaking through the blinds of his window, you can see he was knocked out cold. Placing his drawing on his night stand, you pet his hair before kissing his forehead goodnight and closing his door gently. You went to Toji’s room, knocking on it to make your presence known. When you didn’t hear anything, you let out a sigh before telling him you were leaving with a goodnight following afterwards.

Once you closed their apartment door and sat in your car, a sinking feeling began to creep into your stomach. Though not painful, it wasn't going away no matter how hard you tried to calm down. Not understanding why you felt the sudden rush of anxiety. You didn’t know it back then but perhaps it was your gut feeling warning you something bad would happen. But you would have never thought it was be the downfall of your relationship with Toji.

That’s when the arguments started happening. Well, they weren’t arguments if Toji was the only one yelling. You tried diffusing the situation while not getting emotional yourself. All for the sake of not disturbing Megumi. You tried your best to calm him down, asking what made him feel this way. That he can talk about anything that’s bothering him and you can help him.

But how can Toji say what’s bothering him when it’s you.

Nonetheless, you already knew it had to do something with you. Even if it wasn’t spoken out loud, the strain between you and Toji involved you in some way shape or form. But to know it was because of people around you two, specifically Megumi, seeing your dynamic in the relationship. You couldn’t help but feel hurt knowing Toji was rejecting you, let alone being mad at you for being involved in his and Megumi’s life.

Out of respect for Toji, you would correct anyone and everyone when they see you in public with Megumi. Especially when Toji is with you two. Unfortunately, some of the ‘arguments’ happen because someone commented how you cared for Megumi or the cute little family you three are.

While you would've been content with the compliment, you knew you had to shut it down because you weren’t Megumi’s biological real mother, nor Toji’s wife. Saying you were a close friend rather than girlfriend since it didn’t feel right either. You even corrected Megumi’s school teacher too.

“Actually, I’m not Megumi’s biological mother. I’m just a friend of his father that helps out. That’s all.” As you left with Megumi, his teacher felt confused and melancholic by your answer. To her, you were his mother from the way he talks about you in class.

You begin to correct Megumi whenever he tries to call you Mama. It didn’t matter where it was, you tried making it a habit for Megumi to just call you by your name. At first, Megumi followed along with it. But as time went on, there were slip ups. To a point Megumi didn’t want to refer to you as (Y/N), he wanted to call you Mama. You’ve now understood why Megumi calls you Mama because you acted like one. The only one he’s ever known. The aching pain you felt when you forced yourself to correct him grew. For a child not of your blood to call you his mother, it's an honor and blessing. However, you don’t think Toji would agree.

You had a feeling there was something else you were unaware of that’s got him like this. And it wouldn’t be until your recent ‘argument’ with him is when everything clicked. While carrying the laundry basket of freshly folded towels, you accidentally bumped into one of the photos and knocked it to the floor. The glass covering shattered and pieces of it fell out. It wasn’t a loud smash but loud enough for Toji to come and see you trying to clean up the pieces.

“What are you doing, (Y/N)?”

You flinched at how dangerously low his voice sounded, teetering on frustration. Still kneeling on the floor, you slowly look up and see Toji towering over you. You could never forget how huge and daunting he appeared, or his eyes as he looked down at you.

“I accidentally knocked the picture frame over and it broke. I’ll clean it up, Toji. I promise–”

“No…Let me do it…”

“But Toji, I was the one who made the mess. At least let me–”

“I SAID LET ME DEAL WITH IT, (Y/N)! JUST FINISH PUTTING AWAY THE LAUNDRY AND THE DAMN TOWELS IN THE BATHROOM!!!”

That was the loudest you’ve heard Toji yelled, louder than he spoke to you before. Scrambling to your feet, you grabbed the laundry basket and scurried away into the hall. Though you looked over your shoulder for a split second, you saw Toji crouching down to pick up the broken frame. Then, you caught the glimpse of which photo you accidentally broke. It was a solo picture of his late wife, smiling brightly in a field of sunflowers. The truth began to resurface no matter how much you tried to suppress it. Biting your inner bottom lip to not let a single whimper escape, your eyes glazing over with tears. As you walked further away, you didn’t miss the sniffle from the other direction. Or how Toji didn’t ask if you were okay or hurt when he came to check it out.

As you busy yourself with your chore, everything started to fall into place.

His lingering eyes whenever he saw a small family together or a mother with her baby. The way his gaze had a hard time tearing themselves away from a married couple enjoying their day together. His eyes were full of frustrated longing and desperate yearning. You never dwelled on it thinking he zoned out. Now, your memories become crystal clear that he always had sad eyes. You noticed because he had them when Megumi took his first steps towards you. Smiling and giggling as you coaxed him to continue walking until you caught him in your arms. You were so happy, proud of this milestone of Megumi’s. Then looking over at Toji, you saw his smile but his eyes told a different story as he replayed the video he recorded on his phone.

They were always there, right in front of you for the past three years.

Then came the distancing, his spontaneous rage, lack of intimacy, and the prevalent resistance in allowing Megumi to accept you as his mother.

Now you know, after piecing everything together…

Toji’s longing was wishing his beloved was there with him. It should be her playing and caring for Megumi, not you. It should’ve been her with him and his son, their complete family. But she was gone and you were here instead.

It all went back to her. His late wife and Megumi’s mother…

You didn’t know when it started but you knew your exact feelings when it did. Every time you look at her in the multitude of photos around the apartment, a wave of bitterness and jealousy envelopes your heart like a suffocating hug.

With it came resentment. Then hate, hatred towards her, his wife and only love. Oh how you wished you were Megumi’s mom instead of her. Longing to be her in order for Toji to love you. So you can be loved by him…

That’s when you caught yourself and the fresh thought that left your mind. Once you grasped that thought of yours and the feelings behind it, you were mortified with yourself. How could you ever think like that about someone? Someone who’s life was cut too short and unfairly when it was just getting started? Towards the deceased wife of the man you love and mother of the boy you grew to love as your son?

‘What’s wrong with me…WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK IS WRONG WITH ME!?!?’

Never in your life have you felt disgust for yourself until now. Ashamed of how you allowed these deprave emotions to fester from within for so long. This was beyond unhealthy, almost demented to feel towards someone you have never met before. Not only was this detrimental to your relationship with Toji and Megumi, it was detrimental to yourself to harbor feelings that would eventually corrupt you.

But another thought popped up in your head, a realization that completely shatters your heart.

There were barely any photos of you with Toji and Megumi. Let alone any pictures of you around their home, no traces of you. It was like pouring salt in a gaping fresh wound. That’s when you knew Toji didn’t love you. Nor was he ready to love again. The distance he kept no matter how much you gave yourself to him, helped him, or opened up to him. The walls you tried so desperately to break stood tall and thick, your hands bleeding the more you clawed at it. Your attempts weren't taking you anywhere.

No matter what you did, Toji always kept you at a distance. That after five years of being with him and Megumi, nothing has changed or is willing to.

For it to take three years to have this realization, you bitterly laughed at yourself for staying so wistfully blind to the writings on the wall.

The situation was complicated. This was complicated. You don’t blame Toji for mourning the loss of his first and only love. But it had been almost five years since then. You understand everyone mourns differently and in their own way. Grief never truly goes away, you only learn to coexist with it. But Toji’s grief cuts deep and runs long, making his yearning for his late wife strong. Stronger than what he has with you. To his credit, however, Toji doesn’t hate nor is meant to be hostile toward you. In fact, he deeply cares about you. Yet, he fears by letting you in like he did with his first wife meant he would be replacing her. To forget her and what they had together, moving on from her. Toji was a man with very few fears, but this was one of them and it terrified him to no end.

And yet, here he was. Self-sabotaging himself because of longing, fear, and grief.

Toji knew the reason why your relationship is at its current stage is because it was his fault. He knew he was pushing you away, keeping you afar but within reach. This was all his doing, and yet he can’t bring himself to fix it. No action, no fight, no attempts of saving what will become of your relationship.

It is selfish of you. You never made it your mission to replace Toji’s first wife and the mother of Megumi in their lives. But you wished Toji would give himself a chance to love you as you already did for him. In the end, you couldn’t force Toji into something he wasn’t ready for which pains you immensely.

You couldn’t stay with him, continue being with Toji. Not when this is what you and Toji’s relationship has become. Unlike any sane person, you were reluctant to leave because it meant leaving Megumi behind. You have grown so attached to him, treating him so fondly and tenderly. Of course you did! You watched this kid grow up for the past five years! You remember when Megumi was a baby with no teeth, now he’s a growing toddler who can speak full sentences. Megumi was in a fraction of your life, but you were there for all of his. Then the thought of you, the only mother figure he’s known his entire life, to suddenly leave and never return made your soul howl in agony and anguish. Megumi shouldn’t be caught up in this but he was right in the middle.

You soon left once you were done, your heart bearing an excruciating weight with each passing minute. This wasn’t good for you, neither is it for Toji or Megumi. So you had to make a decision, a devastating one that would befall on everyone involved. But it was the only way to not hurt yourself and put you through hell anymore. As you drive home, you recall a crucial conversation with your best friend. The memory grows stronger as you deal with this relationship.

‘‘WHAT?!? Excuse me, (Y/N). But can you please run it back for me one more time?’’

You were having a hangout with (Best Friend’s Name). Due to lack of align schedules, you haven’t been able to physically fill her in on your personal life. Though when an availability arised, you didn’t expect the hangout to go this route. Then again, it shouldn’t be a surprise to you.

‘‘Okay, okay, okay. Let me get this straight, (Y/N). After almost five years of being together, Toji still hasn’t moved on from his late wife? Doesn’t want Megumi refer to you as his mom even though his own dad doesn’t say anything about the kid’s own biological mother to him? Then blows up on you for the smallest things even though you’re genuinely trying to help?’’

Your silence was everything she needed for an answer. A sigh was evoked from her as she took a deep sip of her espresso latte.

‘‘(Y/N), I love you to hell and back but you need to get out of this relationship. I haven’t met Toji myself so I can’t jump to conclusions. However, I do know his hurting is becoming yours. It’s seeping into you, (Y/N). You’re only trying to be by his side, nothing more and nothing less. But this isn’t good for you, (Y/N). Both for your physical and mental health. I can tell that you are stressed by how tense your posture is, and I know you long enough to know you’re not so rigid.’’

You sat there stunned, was it that noticeable? (Bsf/n)’s eyes look at you through her cup, unchanging by your shocked expression. She inhales deeply, feeling the gravity of the situation before you did.

‘‘I…just didn’t even notice, (Bsf/N).’’

‘‘Well you should. As your best friend and sister by bond, I’m just looking out for you. Meaning, you deserve better, (Y/N). This is unhealthy and you know it yourself. You deserve someone who will love you for you, not hold you to a standard of their previous lovers. Someone who values what they have together with you, not endlessly yearning for something of the past.’’

‘‘(Bsf/N), please—’’

‘‘(Y/N), I’m being serious. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not shitting on Toji for grieving over his losses. But if he’s not willing to accept your help and presence, then he never will, no matter how much you wait. If Toji is stuck in the past and can’t be here in the present with you and his OWN son, he’s going to stay in the past. It sucks that you are suffering from this when you did nothing wrong… And Megumi… Fuck, (Y/N). He’s suffering too, this isn’t going to be easy if you fall through with it. But I need you to know that your health is your top priority and I will have your back one hundred percent. If you even needed, you could live with me. I’m just a call away, (Y/N). Remember that, please.’’

Megumi knew something was off when he saw you two were waiting for him. The gap between you two that was once miniscule has become wide and spacious. Other’s assumed it was to make room for Megumi himself. But the kid knew something was amiss when your smile was paired with dimmed eyes, sad eyes. He’s never seen eyes like that before, and frankly, it was scaring him.

Megumi is intelligent for his age, too intelligent for his liking. He knows that his dad has changed around you within the past few years. Honestly, he hated it because he saw more frequently you were lost in thought. Absentmindedly doing chores but your body devoid of your loving aura.

Unfortunately, this was causing the young boy to become frustrated with his father. Especially when he hears Toji’s yelling at night, the walls muffling the true volume of Toji’s voice. Knowing you were the one it was being directed towards. It got worse when Toji told him you weren’t his mom.

Wasn't his mom? Who was then? The smiling lady in the numerous photos around the apartment? “Okay, yeah sure, Dad,” Megumi thought.

He knows of the woman in the photos, but Megumi doesn’t know her. He doesn’t believe that’s his mama when you have taken care of him his entire life. Genetically, he doesn’t have anything from you. But you treated him like the moms of his classmates. Therefore, you were a mom, his mom.

He doesn’t like the fact his dad is denying it, seeing how it’s starting to take its toll on you. But the poor boy didn’t know how much damage had already been done. For that reason, his gut feeling told him to hold you close for dear life. He couldn’t explain it as his vernacular being limited for his age.

So he breaks out in a sprint towards you, not his dad. You blinked a few times before looking down at Megumi hugging your knees tightly. You and Toji gave each other a look before you crouched down to be at Megumi’s level.

“Megumi, what’s wrong?”

He shakes his head as you rub his back softly to coax him into saying something. He was not budging and you gave Toji a concerned look. Toji sighs before proceeding to pick up Megumi.

“Come on, kid. Time to go home.”

But as soon as Toji’s hands were a few millimeters away from his son’s body, they were immediately smacked away. He stares with wide eyes at what just happened. Megumi didn’t care as he clung to your neck for dear life. Knowing Megumi was going to throw a tantrum, you and Toji decided it would be best for you to hold him.

On the walk home, Megumi’s answers were curt. A simple yes or no. You ruled it as him being cranking with a needed nap. Once home, you put Megumi down but he was glued to your bottom clothing for dear life. He never left you alone for a second. If you went to the bathroom, he’ll simply wait outside the door for you. Megumi also didn’t spare Toji one glance or spoke to him at all. It lasted up to dinner too. Megumi only answered and spoke to you only. If Toji did ask him something, he gave a plain answer.

Toji thought Megumi had a bad day so he let it slide. After putting in Megumi for the night, Toji sat at the table reading the newspaper while you washed the dishes. Tension wasn’t thick but it was there. Present enough that a rug couldn’t hide it. The both of you knew what the tension was about, it was who will be the one to bring it up first. The standoff lasted a few minutes when the first voice spoke, your voice.

“I don’t think we can continue on like this, Toji…”

Your words falling like dominos, setting off the inevitable confrontation.

“I can’t…I can’t have this relationship with you anymore, Toji.”

Although the man in question knew this was bound to happen, it didn’t stop him feeling a pinch of fear and guilt once it came.

“(Y/N), don't be like that. We can work this out–”

“Can we, Toji? Because every time we did, it always ended in an argument. The ones where you’re the only one yelling while I just take it…”

Once mentioned, Toji’s shame slowly took over his body. He was aware he always yelled at you, putting you through pain when you don’t deserve it. You never deserve any of it really. But Toji couldn’t bring it to him to apologize and make it up to you. Was it because he knew you would forgive him every time? Or was it because you allowed it to happen for the sake of keeping him and Megumi happy? He took you for granted, now he was facing the brute force of his consequences.

“Toji,” You paused before sighing. “I’ve been with you for five years yet our relationship hasn’t changed. I don’t know what I’m even to you… This has been the most confused and lonely I’ve felt. I know you stopped loving me, Toji…If you even loved me at all.”

Toji grunts and clears his throat, placing his paper down before looking at you.

“(Y/N), it’s not like that.”

“Then what is, Toji? Tell me, be honest and open your heart to me just this once. Tell me, truthfully, what this is to you? What am I to you?”

“I care about you, (Y/N). I like you a lot. I really do”

There, that was it for you. The nail in the coffin. This wasn’t the last straw that broke the camel’s back, but it confirmed everything that was already there. All telling of how Toji felt and saw you. You didn’t let it surface but you would have winced at the last part of his answer. ‘Like’, he’s always said that. Not once has an “I love you, (Y/N)” has left Toji for the past five years. Now knowing it will never come. It was decided from the start.

“Then I guess this is it for us, Toji.”

Before Toji could ask you what you meant, a muffled crying could be heard from Megumi’s room. You inhaled deeply and exhaled some of the weight off your chest before hanging the drying rag by the sink. You look at Toji with somber eyes before heading off to his son’s room.

“We’ll finish this in the morning, Toji.”

You peaked your head into Megumi’s room seeing the boy sniffle as he closely clutched his stuffed dog you got him. You closed the door softly and kneeled down by Megumi’s bedside. Making your presence known, Megumi looked up and jumped into your arms. You hugged him close, patting his back.

“I wanna sleep with Mama.”

Your breath hitched at the word. You loved when Megumi called you mama, but you weren’t her.

“You wanna sleep with Papa instead of (Y/N), Megumi—?”

“No! I wanna sleep with Mama!”

While you were a bit blown away by the kid’s declaration, you honored it as it would be the last time you get to hold him like this.

“Okay, I’ll sleep with you, Megumi.”

You set up a spare futon from Megumi’s closet and placed it on the floor. Tucking both of you in, you kissed his forehead as you held him close.

“Goodnight Megumi…I love you…”

“G’night, Mama…I love you too…”

Toji finds the two of you asleep. He could go sleep in his own bed but decided not to. Not tonight, at least, because he didn’t want to be alone. You stopped sleeping in his bed a year ago but Toji still didn’t get used to your absence in his bed. Even if he was the reason why you stopped.

He joins the two of you on the floor. Megumi on your right as you lay on your side, back turned towards the empty space Toji decided to occupy. His fingers and arm itched to pull you close, to hold you tightly against his chest. While battling his temptation, an image flashed in Toji’s mind. It was fast but Toji can make out what it was showing him.

Megumi was laying on your chest, snoozing away as you slept peacefully. Then the next image shows Toji with a gentle smile as he caresses your cheek then his hand moves to pat Megumi’s hair. Oddly enough, he didn’t hate his mind for conjuring up that imagination. He welcomed it earnestly.

He satisfied his itch by loosely draping his arm over your side. To him, this would suffice his need to be close, to be near you. To hold you in a somewhat intimate way before you disappear from his life.

For a kid his age, Megumi has impeccable social awareness and perception. But with that, he struggles to properly describe the situation with his limited vocabulary. It’s morning of the next day, and he notices you still hold the same eyes from yesterday. During the morning, he constantly asked if you were okay, if you needed something, checking up on you any way a child can. However, you replied you were just tired and under the weather, always sending Megumi a smile every time he asked. You didn’t want to worry the young boy for the truth will traumatize him and shatter his innocent reality.

Toji knows the evitable will happen as he hears Megumi be concerned for you. Even so, for you to not involve his son is something he’ll silently be grateful for. As Megumi plays on the floor by the coffee table, you and Toji finish off the conversation from last night.

“(Y/N), we’ve been together for five years. You can’t simply throw it away.”

“Five years doesn’t mean anything, Toji, if the relationship doesn’t change or grow. Also, how can you say that I am throwing all of this away when it became one-sided for half of it. I wouldn’t be surprised if it was like that from the start.”

Toji’s eyes closed in on you as you stood your ground. You were leaning on the counter while he was sitting at the table. You looked at him exhausted and defeated. How come Toji is so adamant on keeping this alive when he was the main reason you made your decision? Was it guilt? Loneliness? Manipulation? It could be all three but you didn’t have enough in you to question it.

“Fine then, I’ll admit I haven’t been treating you the best lately. I shouldn’t have exploded on you like the way I have for the past few months.”

“You have been doing it for almost a year, Toji. Not a few months.” You stoically corrected Toji.

Toji sighs once again, but it wasn’t out of frustration. Rather it was out of acknowledgement.

“Then I apologize for it. I knew what I was doing but I was stubborn to say sorry. But we can’t end like this, (Y/N).”

“No, Toji. That’s not how that works. Even your apologies won’t fix this. ”

“Then say it, (Y/N). Why are you breaking up with me after being together for five years—?” Toji says as he gets up and slowly walks towards you. Aware how he uses his size to intimidate and coax answers from people, you got used to his antics.

“Because Toji, you’re not ready. Even after me being by your side and through everything, you are still not ready to be in a serious committed relationship.”

Toji raises an eyebrow and squints his eyes at you. His action doesn’t phase you, as you stare back with unshaken eyes.

“What makes you say that, (Y/N)? How are you so sure about me not being ready–.”

“Then tell me, Toji Zen’in, you love me. I have been saying I love you to you since the second year out of the five. I know I loved you, Toji, and no one else. If you say it back to me and truly mean it, then I will get down on my knees and formally apologize for my assumptions and accusations towards you.” You spoke unwavering and firm, no sign of tremble or stutter as your eyes held the same expression.

Like a deer in headlights, Toji stood frozen with wide eyes. He was caught off guard by your statement. To say he loves you wasn’t such a hard statement but it held so much significance. The last time he said those words with utmost conviction was towards his late wife. Now he had to say those words in order for you to stay. Toji deeply cares and looks out for you in ways you aren’t aware of. But for you two to have this conversation meant he wasn’t fulfilling his role and promises to you. He let his fear of love and vulnerability hold him back in your relationship and you suffered from it. His throat snapped shut when he tried to fill the air with words to buy himself time. Toji’s mouth was open but nothing came out, not the fabled three words to make you stay.

Seeing his mouth open but devoid of an answer, the door you kept open for so long now quietly shuts itself. Locking out whoever it was available for, purposefully locking Toji…and Megumi…out of your life. With a crestfallen smile, the stare you held softened as you shook your head.

“I’ll see myself out then, Zen’in-san. It’s unfortunate what we have had to end like this. But do know I don’t regret this or my love for you and Megumi.”

Megumi is standing by Toji as you say goodbye. You hugged Megumi tight, soaking in the warmth of the kind child one last time before you walked out of his life forever.

“Megumi, promise me you will be a good and kind boy, listening to your papa?”

Megumi nods while being pressed to your shoulder.

“I have to go, Megumi… I love you…”

Megumi breaks away to look up at you, staring into your eyes. There was a slight warmth to them making him break into a small smile.

“I love you too, Mama…”

You smile warmly to him one last time, memorizing him so he wouldn’t fade from your memories. You kissed his forehead before entering your car and driving off. Toji didn’t get angry at what you said to Megumi. Nor did he when Megumi referred to you as mama. He was feeling too downhearted at your departure, his son waving at your fading car in the distance. Unknowingly that would be the last time Megumi would ever see you.

Megumi waited for you the next day, asking for you. Toji thought he could avoid giving Megumi the truth but he caved in when he started to miss your presence.

“She’s gone, Megumi…(Y/N) won't be here anymore…Mama’s not coming back to us anymore…”

Then a loud sob escaped the child, his voice shrill and full of heartbreak. Megumi’s tears were endless and no amount of comfort from Toji could calm him down. Toji can hear his son cry out your name and ‘Mama’ during breaks from his wailing. Megumi’s wailing only stopped because he completely cried himself to exhaustion. Even when Toji tucks him into bed, Megumi’s whimpers for you in his sleep. Toji closes his eyes as he sits at the kitchen table alone and cold. His face in his hands as his reality comes crashing down on him. He should’ve fought you to stay, fought to keep the relationship, to make it up to you so you wouldn’t leave them. To leave him alone with his son.

Fully dawning on him that he misses you, your smile, your laugh, the sound of your voice, your kindness and compassion. He laughs at how ironic the situation is. He has the audacity to take you for granted after everything you’ve done for him and Megumi. Took your love and loyalty for granted after being with him for five years. Then now you rightfully leave and he gets all depressed and heart-broken even though it’s all his fault. Toji lets his tears freely fall from his face as he lost another person in his life. But why does your departure leave a huge hole in his heart? More gut-wrenching and devastating than of his late wife’s passing?

He ponders on it as he sits with his lonesome pathetic self. Not realizing the spot he sat in was your designated seat at the kitchen table.

This wasn't easier on you either. As you drove away, your eyes kept flickering between the road and the rearview mirror. Forcing yourself to catch Megumi’s wave as he and Toji become specks in the background. The drive wasn’t long but it felt like an eternity getting to your place. Becoming agonizingly slow due to sensing your breaking composure and the dam of tears cracking as the minutes past. Parking in front of your place, you let everything loose. You didn’t stop the rush of tears nor held in your sobs any longer. You cried your heart out inside your car, not finding enough energy to do it in the confines of your apartment. You didn’t care how crazy and pitiful you looked to any passersby. You needed this out of your system because the pressure of your emotions became too much. After a good 30 minute crying session, you take a deep breath while sitting in the car.

You fished for your phone and dialed a phone number, wiping your tears away with a sniffle. The phone rings three times before the call goes through.

“(Y/N)? Is everything okay?”

“(Bsf/N)…Remember what you said a while back? I hope you can honor it…Because now’s a good time for it…”

“Hold on, (Y/N)…I’m coming over. Give me seven minutes, hang in there for me.”

The call ends as you stare up at your sunroof, seeing blue hues of the sky bleeding into orange. You laid back into your seat. Focusing on your breathing as your arm draped over your eyes. Your body ached and stung everywhere. Though you were done crying, your heart was in a million pieces and lost all of its warmth. You mumbled out something as you waited.

“I’m so sorry, Megumi…Mama is so sorry…”

A week later, Toji goes to your apartment complex to attempt any possibility of trying again. He walks up to your door and knocks. Around this time, you would usually be home and decompressing from the day. He didn’t see your car but it’s probably getting an oil change. You did talk about getting one soon in the upcoming weeks. He would have knocked again if it wasn’t for one of the neighboring tenants.

“Hi, um, sorry to bother you, sir. Are you friends with (Y/N)?”

Toji’s fist froze mid knock as he turned to the young woman who addressed him.

“I am, actually. I just needed to talk to her.”

“Oh, I see. Excuse me for intruding but unfortunately (Y/N) doesn’t live here anymore.”

Toji’s breath got caught in his chest along with his heart to a standstill. The only thing Toji could feel was the light breeze that passed by. He slowly pivoted his body to face the tenant, looking at her with a strained expression.

“I’m sorry. What do you mean she doesn’t live here anymore?”

“Some time last week, she sold her space and moved out. All within a day too. No one knew she was leaving, but it didn’t look like she was rushing to leave. I ran into her actually after she turned in her keys. I asked her why she was moving. Her answer was she found a place for a good deal and it was closer to her work so she took it. It’s a shame, she was a really good neighbor too. Everyone in the complex loved her.”

Toji felt his blood freeze over and his hand became clammy. Last week was when you broke up with him but he didn’t know about this. You never mentioned moving or finding a new place when together. He mentally curses himself at how fast you were slipping away.

“Thank you for the information, Miss. Did she mention where she was moving by any chance?”

The woman thought about it but shook her head.

“Sorry, but she didn’t say where. I would assume the heart of the city but that’s me guessing. Sorry that this isn’t much.”

“No, it's fine. Thank you for your help, I appreciate it. I’ll leave now so I’m not trespassing here.”

Toji goes to leave but the tenant remembers something.

“Wait! Excuse me again, but I just remembered something else. When I was talking to her last week, I couldn’t help but notice her usual smile doesn’t reach her eyes. Her eyes felt sad like they lost some sort of warmth to them. I didn’t want to be rude but I can tell she was dealing with something painful. If you manage to run into her, please make sure she’s alright.”

Toji’s heart starts to bleed at her observation. He really fucked up, didn’t he? So bad that people are starting to notice it. He could’ve had a good life with you and his son, he looks back on it now. He could have had it all but he self-sabotage himself, ruined everything for him, for you, and even for his son who his late wife asked to take care of as her dying wish.

After thanking the tenant, Toji books it to the heart of Tokyo. He tried calling you but an automated voice told him the number he dialed was currently out of service. You changed your phone number too? He searches through the crowds, hoping to find you in the raging sea of people. Any sign of you, just anything for him to know you were here. But you were gone without trace, just as he did with you in his apartment. With no chance of seeing you in sight, Toji curses himself once again at his undeserving nature and carelessness. He goes back home defeated, wondering what life will be like now without you in it.

Looking out the window, your eyes wandered to the busy streets below. Your mind is wondering about what Toji and Megumi are up to. It was a painful relationship, no doubt about it. But you couldn’t deny the warm memories with Megumi or how Toji treated you early on. Though they can’t be with you anymore, you could never forget those two no matter how much time passes.

You desired for things to have gone differently and worked out in the end. Unfortunately, you can’t change what has already happened.

This was your new life.

You wish things didn’t turn out this way but life goes on, even without them in the picture.

Tag list:

@ploylulla @lillycore @sillyfreakfanparty @viatorem-maris @luqueam

Tag List(@ w/ no links):

@szillx

!!Taglist form HERE!!

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dahliakbs · 2 months

Text

✷Babysitting Reverse Robins: Driving to the Supermarket ‿⁠✷

Masterlist

A couple hours prior Damian had asked you to watch his family while he stayed out late on a case and because you owed him so many favors you said yes. Which led you to what you were doing.

"Dick are you sure you can drive?" you asked the small child.

He seemed pretty excited to finally be able to show off his driving skills even though you were pretty sure he shouldn't even have been able to touch a steering wheel at his age.

The only reason you were allowing this small child to drive you to the supermarket was because you currently had to deal with their baby brother Bruce who for the life of you would not let you go.

You'd tried putting him down so many times but he'd jump cling on to you further and scream his head off and you can't drive like that can you?

Also for some reason Damian allowed him to have a car.

Who gives a child a car?!

"Of course I can drive, I can't say the same for him though" he grinned before turning over to his older brother Jason.

Even though he was also still a child he'd somehow been allowed to ride a motorcycle through the streets.

"Guys I'm not to sure about this, can't we get Tim to drive?" you asked.

He was the much older sibling and you were sure he had much more experience than these two.

"He can't drive"

Scratch that, nevermind

"Why is he older and he can't drive?" You asked as you helped Dick in to the car.

He wasn't even tall enough to get in, let alone reach the steering wheel without having to sit on a little cushion.

Ridiculous

"Cause he sucks and we're better" Jason answered.

Bit harsh but okay.

"You'd better drive quick before the police realize that there's a kid in the drivers seat" you told him before quickly getting in the car.

You hadn't even had time to talk to Jason before he was off, speeding down the streets as if the supermarket wasn't ten minutes away.

Matter of fact you could've just walked there but sadly Gotham was to dangerous for that. So let's hope Dick can actually drive or else your totally screwed.

"Um, so I probably should've told you this before but.." He turns to you with that cute little deceiving smile he always give you before something goes wrong.

In the corner of your eye you can see him slowly pressing his foot into the gas peddle.

"I lied, I can't drive"

....

"WHAT, STOP THE CAR"

He just giggles before hard pressing the gas peddle. All you can do is clutch Baby B tightly in your arms and hope you get to the supermarket in one piece.

#reverse robins #reverse au #batfam #batfam x reader #batfam x you #batfamily #dc #dc x you #batfamily x reader #batman #batman x reader #tim drake #jason todd #dick grayson #jason todd x you #dick grayson x you #tim drake x you #bruce wayne

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sehnsuchts-trunken · 2 months

Text

Red or Blue

Tangerine x reader <3 based on this lovely prompt

it's kind of a slow burn, which is so unlike me, but- welp. whatever? ig? no triggerwarnings anyway, they don't even kiss

masterlist

(he's genuinely so fine i am unwell)

"This is all your fault", you huff, crossing your arms as you stare at the array of candies in front of you.

"How's any of this my fucking fault?", Tangerine seethes, trying to keep his voice down somewhat (which is already better than what he does most times), but hardly succeeding.

"If you'd listened to me, I wouldn't have been backed into that corner in the first place and Lemon wouldn't have had to come save me", you bite back, narrowing your eyes as you pluck a bag of gummies off the shelf. "Ergo, he wouldn't have got hurt."

"Lemon likes the red ones better", Tangerine grunts, taking a step closer to you as an elderly couple turns the corner and pushes their cart into your aisle. "And 'ergo' what the fuck do you mean, love? I wasn't the one to fucking break his leg."

"You don't use ergo like that", you correct, tilting your head back to him as if that nickname hadn't just sent your heart into cardiac arrest. "Also, I'm pretty sure Lemon likes the blue ones just fine."

"Yeah, just fine, but he likes the red ones better, that's the difference."

Tangerine reaches for the bag of red candy and his arm brushes your shoulder, immediately restarting your heartbeat with a deafeaning thump.

"I thought the red ones 'made his stomach feel funny' yesterday", you argue, even though you can already hear the way your resistance is crumbling as his eyes meet yours again, some of that feral fighting instinct in there that you recognise from missions.

"That was the green ones, love", he corrects, plucking the bag of blue candies from your grip and shoving it back into the shelf. You gasp in outrage. "Just listen to me for fucking once and take the goddamn red candy."

You put your hands on your hips and narrow your eyes at him.

"Oh, since when is the fucking problem me listening to you?", you seethe, your lips still parted, ready to shoot a whole tirade at him in the middle of this 24/7 supermarket when you're suddenly interrupted by a hearty chuckle to your left.

Tangerine's head snaps around a nanosecond before yours does.

"I'm sorry", the elderly lady says, her hair white as snow and her arm looped through what you guess to be her husband's. "I didn't want to interrupt you two, I just- I can remember how stressful that was, being young, just married, dealing with the little ones..."

"I'm sure if we'd had these twenty-four hour stores when we'd just had children, we would have stood right there arguing too", her husband laughs.

You blink at them helplessly for a few moments. What the fuck is happening? Hello? Marriage? Kids?

"It gets better", the woman chuckles. "We're happy and stress-free now, aren't we?"

Her husband hums in agreement and presses a kiss to her temple.

"And you look like a lovely couple", she goes on, smiling at you. "You'll manage this stage too."

This stage.

Oh, dear lord.

She's talking about this stage of being married. This stage of having young children. Because you're standing in a 24/7 supermarket candy aisle with Tangerine, arguing about which colour to get for Lemon, which she seems to have interpreted as a nickname for your son.

Your fucking son. Your and Tangerine's son. In your marriage.

"Oh, um", you stutter, brushing a hand through your hair as you stare at the couple, doing your hardest not to cast even a fucking glance Tangerine's way. Your cheeks are stinging with heat. You don't need him to see that. "Actually, we're not-"

"Not married yet", Tangerine interrupts, his hand flexing and clenching around his bag of candy. Any train of thought you'd previously had shatters completely and your head whips around to him after all - is that a faint dust of pink on his cheeks? Is it really what you think it is? Fuck, should your heart be hammering this fast and strong and loud?

"Ah", the woman grins. "How times have changed. We'd had to get married as soon as I was pregnant."

"Are you engaged, then?", her husband asks, raising his eyebrows and smiling pleasantly.

They're so calm. Meanwhile, your heart is doing somersaults in your chest.

"Uh", you say, not all that intelligently.

"Yeah", Tangerine rasps, his voice hoarse somehow. "Few months now."

You blink wordlessly at him. What the actual fuck is he doing? There's no reason to lie. None. You're not undercover.

"That's nice", the woman smiles. "Well, have a good night then."

They're already half-turned away when she looks back over her shoulder.

"Oh, and for those candies", she adds with a conspicuous grin. "Just take both. Let your son decide which he likes better when they're side by side."

You swallow.

"Uh, thanks", you mutter, unsure if they can even still hear. "Good night."

Tangerine drops the bag of candies into your cart. Then he's quiet. And you're quiet.

Too quiet.

For too long.

You don't know what the hell has just happened.

"Tangerine", you breathe, your voice low, and your eyes settle on him slowly. "Since when are we engaged?"

He grunts and drags his eyes away from you, grabbing your bag of blue candies off the shelf again and putting it in the cart with the other one.

"Since fucking never, love", he grumbles, just before his hands close around the handles of the cart. "But I wasn't about to say that, was I?"

"No?", you guess with a frown as you force yourself to move, to trail after him down the aisle. "Because?"

Tangerine turns to look at you like you're mad.

"Because they could've been fucking spies, love", he snarls, as though that's obvious and you're somehow dumb for not thinking of it.

"You're not serious."

He can't be serious.

But he stops the cart and turns to look at you, way too close and way too tall, and if you'd thought you had seen a blush on his cheeks before, it was definitely gone by now. There's that familiar dangerous glint in his eyes instead. Somehow, that puts you more at ease.

"Do you see me bloody laughing?", he seethes, his fingers clenching so hard around the handle that his knuckles turn white.

"I don't think I've ever seen you laugh", you mutter and swallow hard at the way his eyes fixate on yours. "You really made up a whole ass lie for an eighty-year old couple because you thought that they could be spies?"

Tangerine huffs and turns back, pushing the cart with even more ferocity now.

"Yes, love", he grunts.

Your stomach drops. You don't know why.

Instead of dwelling on it, you fiddle with the rings on your hands and fall in step with him.

"Well", you hum. "If you ever do buy me a ring, I don't want it in blue or in red."

#tangerine x reader #bullet train #bullet train tangerine #bullet train tangerine x reader #x reader

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celestialprincesse · 2 months

Note

Hey hun! I just wanted to send this (completely self-indulgent) ask so if you don't wanna write it, yer all good <3.

But how would you think either Ghost or Soap would respond to their partner getting a bad diagnosis. Like not anything fatal but something they'll deal with for the rest of their life?

Anyways have a great day you deserve it!

Perfectly happy to write this!!!! Chronic illness and I are better acquainted than I'd like to admit n writing is like my favourite coping mechanism💕🥴🤚

The dull cream walls of your doctors office have become far too familiar, so has the drone of his voice, and the incessant hum of the ancient AC unit which leaves the room always that little bit too cold. Simon's hand on your back is the only thing saving you from zoning out entirely. In a way, you so wish it isn't keeping you there in the room. You'd give anything to drift away into that comfortable place in the corner of your mind where everything is hazy and warm and nothing hurts. Today, of course, you're not granted such a privilege.

" - treatable, but unfortunately incurable."

You're not surprised, but it doesn't hurt any less either. It's impossible to ignore the way Simon's fingers flex against the base of your spine, his brows furrowing with disappointment as he looks down at the results of your blood tests. The way you feel has long since passed dread - settled on that horrible tear jerking feeling of defeat. Life has fucked you sideways, before well and truly leaving you in the dirt.

Simon ushers you to the car in silence, his heart breaking when your head drops into your hands, a frustrated sigh breaking the terse silence you'd fallen into, your mind having run so fast it stopped completely. The emptiness, the lack of distraction, feels far worse.

He soothes you in the best way he knows. "Takeaway? You fancy sushi?" Anything, he'll do anything to coax you from your thoughts, anything to see you smile. He just needs to see you smile.

If he has to take you to the pet store, or the bookstore or sephora, or the most expensive chocolate shop in town, or drop you off to Price's to sit with his wife and watch romcoms with pints of ice cream, whatever he has to do, he'll do it.

You plead to just go home. You just want to sit on the couch and wallow.

He puts up less of a fight than you'd expect, dropping into the supermarket to grab a pint of milk before driving the two of you back home.

By the time you've changed back into your sweats and one of Simon's old hoodies, he's covered the coffee table in all of your favourite snacks, your favourite movie ready to go, and open arms for you to walk into.

"Not gonna let my girl be sick and sad, yeah?"

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m00nsbaby · 11 months

Text

The invisible barrier.

(Jake Lockley x F!Reader)

Tags - Warnings: Jake doesn’t know about Marc or Steven. Angst, smut, fluff, everything. Most of Jake’s dialogues are in Spanish, most of reader’s are in English except in November - December. Word count: 4,9 k. (Lol, sorry) Summary: A whole year trying to understand Jake Lockley. (Literally)

January.

"¡Hola!" (Hello.) The sudden voice next to you made you jump as you made the most important and complicated decision of the week.

Would you choose pretzels with dark or white chocolate?

Reluctantly, you turned to your side to see a man standing just a few inches away from you. On another occasion, you would have probably jumped back or fled to another aisle in the supermarket, but the apologetic smile on his lips and the puppy-like look in his eyes told you that he didn't want to be in this situation either.

"Perdón, ¿Podrías decirme qué dice aquí?” (Sorry. Could you tell me what it says here?) The words came out quickly from his mouth and you furrowed your brow in confusion. Your fleeting and ridiculous Spanish classes had never been of much use, even less now that you had the opportunity to help an attractive man.

"I don't... Huh." You cleared your throat, searching for a way to say, 'Maybe I can't help you, but I'll move heaven and earth to try.' Dramatic? Yes, of course, but what more could be expected from a hopeless romantic? Many love stories began like this in your mind; this was a scenario you had imagined at least twice before falling asleep. "No hablo español." (I don’t speak Spanish.)

The man blinked a couple of times, as if realizing that he had gathered courage for about 15 minutes only to lose his dignity like this.

"Oh." He cleared his throat, nodding afterward. "Thanks," he said shyly, as if trying to hide his accent.

"No, no, let me help you. What do you need?" You turned the bag of Cheetos he was holding in his hands so you could see the list of ingredients on the back as he was asking. Both of you were guessing what you were saying. Your gaze scanned the list, nodding your head when you detected the problem. Everything was written in English.

Sure, your aisle companion had an extra problem on top of that. The letters were too small for his poor eyesight, and he would rather ask for help from strangers than give up on the idea of using glasses.

"Give me a second." Your fingers quickly handled your phone as you took the bag from his hands.

You took a photo and the app took care of the work for you, translating every word on the red packaging you held. You didn't hesitate to take a step forward and extend your hand far enough for your phone to be at the stranger's ear level, who didn't question your methods for a moment.

He just stood still, listening.

"¿Colorante rojo número 6?” (Red dye number 6?) He questioned when the voice function finished. And you quickly scanned the phone screen, trying to find the part on the list that seemed closest to what he had just said.

Well, seis = 6, that one was easy.

"Yes, 6." You saw him smile and take the bag back from your hands to shake it in a celebratory manner. "Why?"

"Huh?"

"Why 6?" He guessed based on how you tilted your head to one side what you were asking.

"Soy alérgico al número 4, o al menos eso creo.” (I'm allergic to the number 4. Or at least, I think I am.) He pointed to his throat. "Siento comezón en la garganta cuando como cosas que lo tienen.” (My throat itches when I eat things that have it.")

Did you understand anything he said? No, nothing beyond the number 4. So, you smiled and nodded, eliciting a warm laugh from him.

He was cute.

"Gracias." (Thank you.) It seemed like he understood the basics, just like you. It was better to use his words than to deal with the pronunciation of the "t" and "h" together.

"It's okay." You shrugged while continuing to smile in a friendly manner. It wasn't because the stranger was incredibly attractive; you always behaved this way with people, or at least you tried to. "Enjoy your Cheetos."

Another giggle. "Cheetos," he repeated, imitating the way you pronounced the brand's name.

You rolled your eyes playfully and went back to the pretzels without saying anything else.

Well, there went the potential love of your life. Both of you were too shy to engage in casual conversation. You were aware that pretending to have the confidence to do so would be a lie.

Silently, you paid for your pretzels covered in white chocolate, looking around in case the guy was still nearby. After a few seconds, you gave up. Well, it was nothing out of the ordinary, even with one more chance, you wouldn't have approached him. More than 20 dollars for a bag of chocolate covered pretzels? That must be a crime, the first time you bought one . . .

"Hola de nuevo.” (Hi again.) The leather of his jacket brushed against your skin as you bumped into him. He was in the exact same position as you, one hand holding his Cheetos, the other clutching the receipt he was trying to read with squinted eyes.

You almost had a heart attack.

"Hi." You smiled, your cheeks betraying you as they turned rosy just from being around him like this. You had to take a step back after the clumsy little push you gave him.

"¿Tienes cómo regresar a tu casa?” (Do you have a way to get home?) You frowned at the question. This only confirmed that your crazy fantasy wasn't going to work out; there was a huge barrier between you.

He could see the confusion on your face so he pointed outside. It was raining heavily.

"Oh." You had been so engrossed in your pursuit of him that you hadn't thought about that. It wasn't a terrible problem, though; you could just wait until it calmed down.

You could spend another $20 on an umbrella in the worst case. Or call a car to take you the 10-minute walk to your house.

"I'll just wait." You had to remind yourself not to get too deep into your words.

"Yo te llevo.” (I'll give you a ride.) He quickly said. "A ride." The way the 'r' rolled off his mouth was enough to make you dizzy.

"Are you sure?" This couldn't be happening. This genuinely couldn't be happening.

"Of course, I'm sure," he repeated, smiling. This couldn't be happening.

It couldn't.

That night, you ran together to his car in the rain, laughing. He opened the door for you, even though it meant a few extra minutes of water poured on him.

You gave him directions through your phone, and you learned how to say "cuadras" (blocks) to guide someone next time, and he kept telling you something you didn't understand, but he noticed you were just nodding for him to keep talking.

He said goodbye with a kiss on your cheek. He used a word similar to "custom" to justify it, ‘costumbre’ maybe.

Oh, and you exchanged numbers. It turned out the stranger, Jake Lockley, worked as a taxi driver most nights. You understood that because the words "taxi" and "noche" were in your mental dictionary.

February.

Your first date was a disaster.

You never considered that to spend the day together, you had to exchange more than 5 words, and Jake stained your beautiful pink sundress with an ice cream that didn't even taste that good.

Oh, at some point, you tripped too. You were so focused on trying to understand one of the anecdotes he was telling you that you ended up on the ground with a scraped knee.

That wasn't so bad, though. I mean, you had Jake on one knee, checking yours. He even had you step on his thigh so he could clean you up with his ice cream-covered napkin.

When the day came to an end, he took you home. You noticed he had memorized your address, making it easier for both of you. You hummed a song together to cover the silence of two people who had to resort to other means of communication than talking.

"I had fun." Lie, this hadn't been anything like you imagined a first date, not after reading books or watching movies.

He nodded silently as he got out of the car to open the door for you.

And even though the date was a complete disaster, Jake kissed you.

He kissed you against the closed door of your apartment, holding you by the waist as if you intended to escape from his arms, begging you silently not to separate from him.

"¿Repetimos la próxima semana?” (Second date next week?)

March.

Text messages flowed throughout the weeks. Depending on the day, one or the other used the translator to send messages that the other could understand.

Sometimes they were just silly pictures, mostly of cats. You found a silly liking for sending him videos and photos of different animals in romantic situations, hugging each other and such, with only the description 'us.'

Jake responded ‘nosotros’ with different emojis depending on the day. He liked the white heart.

His car became familiar to you, as well as the late-night drives with music. You wondered if Jake had started neglecting his work to spend more time with you, and although it sounded selfish, you didn't care much.

You enjoyed his company.

April.

Your fingers played with his curls while both of you rested comfortably on your bed, you on the pillows, Jake on your abdomen.

He was surprisingly interested in one of the old books you hadn't touched in a long time.

"Jake?" He immediately put the book down to look at you. "Can you help me with a word?"

"¿Ahora?" (Now?) he asked.

"Right now."

"¿Cuál palabra?" (Which word?) He closed his eyes as your fingers continued to enjoy playing with his hair. It was so soft that the gentle caresses you gave were enough to mess it up.

"Boyfriend."

"Novio." You stretched your free hand with difficulty. He opened his eyes again, looking at you with interest as you struggled in the least attractive way to open one of your drawers with one hand. Something cracked in it.

You put the bag of Cheetos on his chest, clearing your throat afterwards.

"¿Quieres ser mi novio?” (Do you want to be my boyfriend?)

May.

"Jake?"

The car hadn't started yet when he turned to look at you, raising his eyebrows as if to ask what was wrong. You stretched enough to touch his knuckles, which were marked with a purple tone and scraped.

Your gaze went to him. It was as if both of you knew how to communicate through looks.

"No sé qué me pasó. Mi teoría es que golpee algo mientras dormía.” (I don't know what happened. My theory is that I hit something while asleep.) He frowned as he extended his fingers to get a better view of them. It looked like he had beaten up someone, and he couldn't deny that it hurt, especially when he gripped the steering wheel of the car.

"Are you still having those strange dreams?"

"Weird dreams," Jake whispered to himself as a way to remember your words. "Sí, sueños raros.” (Yes, weird dreams.)

You pursed your lips without saying more as you brushed his knuckles with your thumb, as gently as you could.

"Let's go." You finally gave in, returning to your seat with an unconvincing gesture.

June.

"I don't understand football." You said as you walked hand in hand, leaning some of your weight against his body.

Technically, neither of you were drunk; you were just flushed from the heat of the alcohol, giggly and a little tipsy. Jake had mentioned how funny it would be to go to one of those bars where they show football games for fans, even though neither of you were fans. Choosing a team randomly to support, drinking things with strange names, and maybe sharing spicy wings sounded like a good plan.

That was your Friday night.

"Tampoco yo.” (Neither do I.) Jake was doing his best not to laugh. He failed miserably.

When you reached his car, you leaned your body against it, and your hands ended up on your boyfriend's shirt. He immediately knew what you wanted, bringing both hands to your waist and leaning forward, closer.

"Is it hot here, or was it the 4 margaritas we drank?" You whispered while trying to contain your smile.

"Debe ser ese vestido.” (It must be that dress.) His lips brushed against yours. The sudden change in his voice made you shiver, so husky. “O por lo menos es lo que me está poniendo caliente a mi.” (At least I know that's what's making me hot.) It was the last thing he said before kissing you as if his life depended on it.

You moaned into his mouth, pressed between his body and the car. The kiss was wet as his mischievous hands slid under your dress, squeezing your ass firmly enough for it to hurt. Not in a bad way. "Jake." You complained as you looked around to make sure no one was walking by to see you.

"Date la vuelta.” (Turn around.) Apparently, your Spanish only worked in moments of convenience because you obeyed immediately. You turned your body with difficulty, mainly because he refused to let go of you. You felt his erection against you as soon as your cheek collided with the cold metal of the car. He was rubbing against your ass while biting your neck to his liking, sucking and licking your skin until he marked it. "Fuck, Jake." You whispered with your eyes closed. You could have cum right there with just his kisses and soft touches. Fortunately, he was more considerate because one of the hands that rested on your waist little by little went between your legs, your dress was already raised enough to only have to worry about your panties, he brushed his fingers over your abdomen before sliding his middle finger between your lips. First he wetted it well before moving up to your clit. His touch made you tremble and hiss. "¿Un par de besos te tienen así, corazón?” (A couple of kisses have you like this, sweetheart?) You could hear the smirk on his lips as his finger traced circles against your most sensitive area. "Imagínate como será cuando esté dentro de ti.” (Imagine how it will be like when I'm inside you.) A shameless moan escaped from you. "Eso quieres, ¿No?” (You want that, don't you?) He kept talking in your ear while he distributed one or two kisses between your neck and your shoulder. “Sentirme duro. Profundo.” (To feel me hard. Deep.) He simulated thrusts between each word, his hip pushing yours harder against the car and against his hand that kept playing with your pussy to make you whimper. You nodded without opening your eyes. "Con palabras." (Use your words.) He said clicking his tongue.

"Yes please." You begged desperately while trying to get air through your mouth. "Buena niña.” (Good girl.) You swallowed the complaint of feeling him take his hand out of your panties, just because you immediately heard how he started to unbutton his jeans. "Escupe.” (Spit.) You could feel his girth between your legs, letting you know that there were no more clothes involved. You took a few seconds to be able to clean the fingers that were inside you before with your tongue, making Jake groan just by imagining what you would do with your mouth in another situation. When you were satisfied you spat into the palm of his hand as requested. He wrapped his hand around his cock, and covered it with your saliva. He used the same hand to accommodate it between your lips. A sigh of relief left your mouth when you finally felt it inside you. A muffled whimper accompanied the way your muscles suddenly relaxed, as if that was what you needed. "Mierda, amor." (Shit, love.) As Jake's forehead rested against your shoulder, he muttered under his breath. "Voy a terminar rápido si sigues apretándome así.” (I'm going to finish fast if you keep squeezing me like this.) His voice made you dizzy, you mentally thanked all those days you spent understanding each other because his words could have been enough to push you to the limit. It didn't take long for both of you to pick up a delicious rhythm. When he pushed his hip forward, you pushed back to make him go deeper. When he was pulling back, you were pulling forward almost taking his member all the way out to prepare for his next thrust. You were so close you had to bite the hand he put to your mouth to keep from screaming. "¿Vas a terminar para mi, mi vida?” (Are you going to finish for me, my life?) He whimpered. Oh god, he fucking whimpered. He had a desperate tone to his voice, almost like he was comforting you. "Déjame sentirlo, por favor, por favor.” (Let me feel it, please, please.) This time it was he who was begging. Your saliva had started running against Jake's hand. You were seeing stars from squeezing your eyes shut, and how close you were wasn't helping at all. The spasms had started around him, and without warning, the inevitable happened. He finished inside of you. His cum being pushed deeper inside you with each thrust he took to finish his orgasm was enough for you to reach yours. "Amor, carajo.” (Love, damn it.) His voice cracked at the sensitivity combining with your walls squeezing him every few seconds. You were milking him. "Te amo.” (I love you.) He whispered as his breath interrupted each of his words. That was the first time he said it.

July.

The only thing that relaxed you was that this 360° turn apparently had nothing to do with you.

Jake was someone else.

His flirty and playful personality was just a memory to you. Under his eyes, there were huge dark circles since his dreams had become crazier and more frequent.

There were unexplained wounds on his body, according to him. Or sometimes there were none, but he felt the pain throughout his body, as if a truck had run over him, he said.

He became silent, as if he felt he was talking too much when he started to let out words about what was happening. He still hugged and kissed you, still spent afternoons with you and continued to respond “nosotros" to your silly animal photos.

But something wasn't right. There was something so... strange.

You did what you could to work on it, to let it pass.

Even if it cost you the trust in your relationship.

August.

Your hands trembled as you dialed his number for the tenth time that night. Maybe you were being dramatic, but Jake always made sure to let you know when he had returned home.

The sudden change that had occurred in him over the past 3 months didn't help at all. You wouldn't last a lifetime without wondering why his body kept producing wounds he claimed not to remember, or about those days of complete dissociation on his part, when he swore you were playing with him when you told him it was Saturday and not Wednesday.

"I just want to know you're okay." You whispered with a broken voice to the voicemail. "Please, just tell me you're okay."

There was no response that night. You couldn't sleep either.

The next day, when he showed up at your doorstep with the dark circles you had learned to get used to over the days, your body's first reaction was to push him with all your strength. It was only enough to make him stagger.

"You're an idiot." You spat the words, your eyes flooded with tears.

"Me quedé dormido anoche, perdón.” (I fell asleep, I'm sorry.) He didn't even seem to believe the words coming out of his mouth, but how could he explain to you what was happening in his life if he didn't even know what the hell was going on?

"How much longer do you plan on lying to me?" You didn't care that people passing by on the street saw you both as crazy. You in your pajamas, him leaning against the car as a method of protection.

"No te estoy mintiendo." (I’m not lying to you.) He raised his voice a little, letting out a lot of the feelings he had been suppressing for a while.

"Do you think I'm stupid?" The worst part was that you also had things bottled up inside you, the worry for him being the thing that choked you every day, squeezing tighter and tighter.

"Creo que no quieres entenderme.” (I think you don't want to understand me.) He was angry. You had never heard him like this, especially not directed at you. "Creo que ni siquiera estás intentando.” (I think you're not even trying.)

Damn the day you started to understand his words.

"I'm not understanding you, Jake?" You had already broken into tears. Your finger collided against his chest in an accusatory manner while he seemed unaffected, even though inside he was falling apart.

It was too much for him. Everything was too much.

"I've been trying for months to ignore what you're hiding from me." It was so difficult to argue in this way that frustration was suffocating you.

"¡No te estoy ocultando una mierda!” (I'm not hiding shit from you!) You snapped.

With fear.

Mid-sentence, Jake had reached out a hand to push you. Not with much force, just enough to separate you from his chest.

In seconds, he became aware of what he had done. If the car wasn't behind him, he would have moved even further away from you. He was overwhelmed by fear too.

He was losing himself as he had suspected.

"Me tengo que ir.” (I have to go.)

"Jake Lockley, if you leave, I don't want you to come back." Tired of seeing him run away from the problems, you resorted to the last card you would have liked to play.

You were foolish to think he would risk hurting you again. The last thing you heard was the sound of the engine accelerating to get away from you as fast as possible.

September.

The first part of September is blurry. You did your best to survive without him, but the days passed so quickly that you began to question if you were alive or just living in a bad dream that had lasted longer than necessary.

It was as if Jake was dead to you, without any sign, without any notice, nothing.

He simply disappeared.

The clear countdown of the days begins on the 13th, when your phone lit up to notify you that he wasn't doing much better than you.

✉: ¿Podemos hablar? (Can we talk?)

✉: Estoy perdido. (I'm lost.)

It hurt not having him, but it hurt more to see Jake's well-being. Not knowing how he was, where he was, what he was doing after that tragic day tormented you.

You replied, and the most important relationship in your life turned into a series of midnight calls where you tried to understand what your ex-boyfriend was mumbling from the solitude of his car.

You had friendships that had started in stranger ways than this, you could endure this.

Make it work.

October.

"Trick or treat." Mentally, he slapped himself for how ridiculous his way of reappearing was.

A half-smile appeared on your lips as you opened the door and came face to face with an embarrassed Jake, wearing your favorite leather jacket and both hands in his pockets as if he was waiting to be scolded by you.

"I doubt any of these things don't have artificial coloring number 4." That was your only response as you leaned your body against the door frame. With one hand, you held the huge container of candies that came out of hiding every Halloween.

"Estaba por aquí.” (I was around here.) Jake pointed back, the path that led to the supermarket, or at least that's what you assumed. He had a very lame excuse to see you, but that worked for you. The interest was enough. "Y pensé en venir a saludar.” (And I thought of coming. To say hi.)

"I'm watching Friday The 13th." You looked behind him. Children approached with shyness, seeking candy. "Come in, let me finish with the candies."

Your smile was so genuine that Jake's heart skipped a beat. How had he lasted so long without you? Those lost 3 months would always be present in the multiple mistakes he made.

That night, you kissed until it hurt. Until your lips hurt from bites, until the skin of his neck burned from love bites, until his fingers became imprinted on your waist. "I love you." You said between moans as the movie gave you an almost unreal vision of who the love of your life was. Flashes in white, in red, even in black showing you how beautiful he was from any angle or lighting. He made your sofa creak as he raised his hip toward you, thrusting into you even deeper if that was possible. "I love you, Jake." You repeated with a broken voice while your little jumps gained more strength. Your body was already exhausted, your legs were shaking and your hair stuck to your forehead and neck from sweat but emotionally you refused to get away from him. "Te amo. Te amo. Te amo.” (I love you. I love you. I love you.) His whispers mixed with his panting. You both seemed to be on the verge of tears. "Don't go away again." Your fingers tightened on his chest, scratching at his skin as you had done many times before. "Don't ever leave me again, Jake." The way you said his name burned in his heart. He brought a hand to one of yours to squeeze them on his chest, making you feel his agitated heartbeat. There was no need to say more, not while your kisses, movements and moans spoke for themselves. That night, as you rested on his chest after an orgasm that made you both shake from head to toe, he promised you never to leave. "Mi vida.” (My life.) He repeated as his fingers untangled your hair and your weight on him increased as you drifted off to sleep. "Mi cielo. Mi corazón.” (My darling. My heart.) He whispered in your ear. "Mi todo." (My everything.)

November.

Everything with Jake was stupidly easy.

Laughing, singing, existing.

As easy as in the romantic comedies you used to love watching before you met him. And it's not that you had forgotten about those because of him, but now you enjoyed watching action movies, those that allow you to get distracted without losing track of the plot.

You didn't press him to talk about what happened in those months, knowing that there were still a thousand secrets between you because you still saw strange bruises on his body, marks on his knuckles, or felt him getting up in the early hours of the morning when he stayed over with you.

"Leave me alone!" You ran down the hallway, laughing with him trailing behind. Probably restraining himself because it would be impossible for him not to catch you with his eyes closed.

He wrapped an arm around you to press you against his chest and used the other to prevent both of you from crashing into the wall. He was laughing too.

"Do you give up?" He squeezed you tighter with his arm.

"Never! Let me go!"

The laughter almost made it difficult for you to speak.

"Come back to me, and I'll let you go."

The seconds of silence churned his stomach.

"What?"

"I mean..." He cleared his throat. "Officially. Would you be my girlfriend? Please?"

It almost seemed like he was begging you.

You reassured his fears with a kiss.

December.

"I don't understand how you can eat these things." You took a deep breath through your mouth, sticking out your tongue, already reddened by the red dye number 6, to seek some relief from the burning sensation.

Jake was setting down a fifth box from his arms. He sighed, tired.

"No puedo creer que no me estés ayudando.” (I can't believe you're not helping me.) He approached you to steal one of the Cheetos from your bag while you licked your fingers. "Te dije que uses palillos chinos, así evitas el polvo.” (I told you to use chopsticks, that way you avoid getting your fingers dusty.)

"The dust is the best part." You popped your thumb out of your mouth.

"Disgusting." He feigned a look of disgust as he settled between your legs, resting a hand on your thigh and giving it a squeeze.

"You didn't say that when..."

"¡Dios mío!" (My God!) He gasped, biting his lower lip to suppress his laughter. He leaned forward, stealing a chaste kiss from you. "Compórtate.” (Behave.)

"Are there many more boxes left? I didn't think you had so much stuff in your apartment." You pushed the box aside as you leaned forward to prolong your kisses.

"This is my apartment." He whispered with a smile against your lips.

"Touché." Your fingers slowly roamed his shirt collar before pulling him closer with a tug on the fabric. "What if you take a break?"

Jake's hands were already on his pants, figuring out how to unbutton his jeans without separating from your body.

"I'm never going to stop unpacking." He complained as his lips began to descend towards your neck.

Ok now that I have written happy endings for the three of them I’m sick of them, lol, I’ll try to get angst-ier with these thingies

#jake lockley #jake lockley x reader #jake lockley x you #marc spector x you #marc spector x reader #marc spector #Steven Grant #steven grant x you #steven grant x reader #moon knight x reader #Moon Knight #moon knight x you #marvel #Oscar Isaac #oscar isaac x reader #oscar isaac x you

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exhaslo · 6 months

Text

Puzzle Pieces Ch.5

(Mafia!Miguel x Shy!Reader)

Ch.1, Ch.2, Ch.3, Ch.4

Warning: Eventual Smut so Minors DNI, mentions of abuse, blood, murder, language, fluff, bullying, mentions of sex

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------

You could feel how hot your cheeks were still. Ever since you had kissed Miguel's cheek, you couldn't stop thinking about him. He was so nice to you and such a gentlemen. Honestly, all you saw were green flags coming from him. You really wanted to keep seeing him and talking to him and just, enjoying how you felt around him.

You were currently at work, wrapping some meat for a custom order. It was strange. Immediately after your first date with Miguel, your work load got easier. You didn't feel as stressed or tired anymore that you were actually able to eat normally again.

"The usual?" Your supervisor asked.

Your ears perked up, turning your head. There was Miguel, whispering something before a bunch of men entered the third freezer. You watched as Miguel slowly walked by you, his hand swiftly patting your head.

Oh, you loved it when he did that. Miguel had started to pat your head every now and then. It was a small token of affection, but it made your body feel all warm and fuzzy inside. You thought it was silly, but you wanted Miguel to keep showing you such small affection like that.

"Clock out when I finish," Miguel whispered.

Your ears perked up and just nodded to his request. Once he entered the freezer, you scurried to your supervisor and informed him of your early leaving. Your supervisor just agreed with ease and let you finish your work.

----------

Miguel just drank in every loving look you gave him. It felt like you were so close to being his, but Miguel hasn't even kissed you yet. He was still warming you up to be his little wife. Miguel needed to know how comfortable you were with his part of his life.

Sitting against his chair, Miguel watched as his men took care of another Goblin Society member. He hummed towards the man's screams, still recalling your adorable expression to his head pats. Honestly, how innocent could someone be?

"Miguel, he isn't talking." Peter whispered. Miguel lazily glanced towards the pathetic man,

"Hobie, do whatever."

"Aye, finally."

Miguel leaned back, not interested in this anymore. He already had a long night dealing with Alchemax work, only to wake up to this fool snooping around his base. Miguel just needed his dose of stress reliever, aka you.

Once the screams finally stopped, Miguel inhaled deeply. He stood up and walked towards the body then faced his men. Taking a look at his watch, Miguel grunted lowly.

"Tighten security. The fact that such a worm like this attempted to sneak around is pathetic." He spat then turned towards Ben, "You and Jessica go to the port and check the shipment. I don't want anymore surprises."

With a wave of his hand, Miguel left the freezer first. He walked through the maze of boxes and exited. The hallway where the freezers were was empty as usual. Stuffing his hands in his pockets, Miguel walked down the hallway, towards the deli.

You were looking better. It had only been two weeks since your first date, but things were changing for you for the better. Miguel made sure to have a word with the supermarket. He was going to take care of you little by little. You were deserving of his affection.

He on the other hand, did not deserve yours, but Miguel was sure as shit going to take it.

Making eye contact with you, Miguel watched as you hurried to clock out and get your stuff. Miguel was a greedy man. He always took what he wanted. That or it just happened to land on his lap, just like you did.

"S-Sorry, d-did I make you wait long?" You asked.

Miguel patted your head, enjoying the look you gave him. If only he knew it was this easy to win your heart. Miguel would have done this from the start.

"As promised, you get to pick the place for our date," Miguel said with a warm smile, walking you out of the supermarket.

"I-I saw there is this H-Halloween event in Central P-Park. P-Pumpkins, apple p-picking and some o-other stuff. C-Can we go there?" You asked him. Miguel helped you into the car,

"I'm not going to say no if it's where you want to go,"

"R-Really?!"

Watching you smile brightly, Miguel couldn't help but give in. If you wanted something, he was going to give it to you. Call it love, but Miguel was falling for you hard. His little bunny deserved everything, especially if you were going to be his.

-------

You squealed lowly as you and Miguel arrived at the event. Practically jumping in place, you grabbed Miguel's hand, wanting to look around. This was something new and actually fun. You hadn't had a chance to leave your apartment to do anything like this.

"Wah, look at those!" You whispered, spotting some stands that sold desserts.

Miguel just watched you, keeping his composure as he followed your every whim. Right now, he was outside his territory. Buying you a cupcake, Miguel watched as you stayed close to him, nibbling happily on the treat.

You couldn't stop smiling as you munched on your cupcake. For once, you actually went somewhere that you wanted to go. Not only that, but Miguel was treating you like his girlfriend. Following you around and getting you treats. It was making your heart flutter. Gripping his sleeve, you tried to hide your face as you kept enjoying your treat.

Miguel kept his arm was wrapped around you waist, keeping an eye out. Some of his men were around to keep guard, but Miguel still had to be careful. After all, everything worked out when he took care of it himself.

Miguel's goal was to have the whole city of Nueva York under his command. He was almost there, but there were still some small gangs and enemies who tried to stand in his way. Miguel wasn't going to let those scum win. Not when he was so close to being in charge of everything.

"Mhm~ Sure you don't want one?" You asked. Miguel leaned down towards you, his forehead against yours,

"If you let me lick off your crumbs," He whispered, watching your face turn bright red.

A soft chuckle escaped his lips as he wiped some frosting off you lip and proceeded to lick it off his finger. You squeaked and hid your face in your sleeve, while he scrunched up in disgust. Miguel was never a fan of sweets, but he'll do anything for you.

"W-Want....Want to pick out a p-pumpkin?" You asked lowly. Miguel played with you hair in response,

"Sure,"

You threw away your wrapper, still holding onto Miguel's hand. Your heart was racing since Miguel was the one who asked you to hold onto him at all times. You were feeling embarrassed. These dates were making you want Miguel more and more.

You were just scared.

Scared of another Eddie. You gave yourself the better of the doubt, wanting to believe Miguel to be different. So far, he sure did feel different, but deep down...You were still terrified of him turning around and turning into another Eddie.

Stopping at the pumpkin patch, you curiously looked around, wanting to distract your mind. You were having a good time with Miguel. It was best to avoid thinking about the past. Once you found the perfect pumpkin, you cheered quietly. You wanted to try and make your own pumpkin desserts. Give them to Miguel as a gift for taking good care of you. Picking up the pumpkin, you smiled and showed Miguel.

Right as you did, an explosion happened.

Miguel immediately grabbed you, pulling you into his embrace as he signaled his men to check it out. Miguel cussed lowly as he recognized the laughter to be Goblin's and his crew. Holding your head in place, Miguel swiftly picked you up and took you back to his car.

"M-Miguel," You whimpered, shaking as you still held your pumpkin.

"My driver will take you home. Text me when you arrive."

"W-Wait," You whimpered, putting your pumpkin down and hugging Miguel's waist, "P-Please...Please don't go."

"I have to," Miguel stroked your cheek and placed a firm kiss against your forehead, "Text me when you get home, mi amor. (my love)"

Your lips quivered as the car drove off. You watched as Miguel pulled out a gun and ran back to where the explosion was. Tears rolled down your cheek as you trembled in fear. You just wanted him to hold you a bit longer and tell you that everything was okay.

That's all you wanted.

---------

Miguel cussed in Spanish, angry that his date got ruined. Things were moving along quite nicely. Miguel actually felt like you were ready for him to kiss you. But, of course, like everything else good in his life, something had to happen.

"Take them down,"

----------

After a few hours of endless shooting and fighting, the Goblin and his crew ended up giving up. Well, Miguel got his hands dirty and beat the living shit out of the Green Goblin himself. Once the cops showed up, Miguel and his Spiders disappeared from the scene, leaving nothing but their webs of destruction.

Riding with Peter, Miguel finally looked at his phone and saw your text. He grunted lowly, recalling your tears before he parted. In an annoyed and demanding tone, Miguel told Peter to drop him off at your place.

It was a surprise, but Peter happily agreed. Teasing Miguel about finally finding love and whatnot. Miguel tuned him out since he knew that Peter was just going to show him more pictures of Mayday, his child.

"Peter, why don't you do something productive instead?"

----------

You whimpered lowly as you took the batch of pumpkin cupcakes out of the oven. You were still waiting for Miguel to text you back. It had been hours since you've heard from him. Five hours to be exact and you only knew that because it took you four hours to boil the pumpkin for the puree.

Placing the cookies down to cool, you gasp as you heard your door bell. Quickly, you rushed over and glanced at the peep hole. Seeing Miguel, you opened the door and tackled him in a tight hug. Tears rolling down your cheeks as you cried softly.

"I'm sorry, (Y/N)." Miguel whispered as he wrapped his arms around you, bringing you back inside.

"I-I was s-so s-s-scared! M-Miguel, p-please..." You whimpered into his chest, then gasped moving away, "S-Sorry! I-I'm getting your shirt d-"

"I don't care about my clothes," Miguel shut the door and pulled you back into his embrace, "How are you? No lingering pain from that explosion earlier?"

This a new. Your eyes widen as tears rolled down your cheeks as Miguel observed you. He was worried about you. Asking about how you were doing. No one had ever asked if you were ever doing okay. Shaking, you gripped Miguel's sleeves and hugged him again.

"Thank you," You whispered. Miguel sighed as he stroked your hair,

"Sit down, Mi pequeño conejito (my little bunny). I need to talk to you,"

You slowly followed Miguel to your couch, rubbing your eyes. You sat beside him, noticing the furrow in his brows. This was the most annoyed you ever seen him. You played with your sleeves, worried about what this could be about.

"I need you to know about what else I do, aside from being a CEO at Alchemax."

Miguel glanced at you, watching you fidget in your seat. He scoffed lowly, wondering what you were nervous about now. Gripping his hands, Miguel tried to hold this out as longer. It was always a risk telling someone about his mafia business. He had to secure their silence before revealing his secret.

But how could he do that to you?

You could have gotten injured today because of the Goblin's bullshit. Miguel wanted to protect those he cherished. His mafia group was made to protect the innocent, despite how it seems. Fixing his posture, Miguel turned towards you.

"(Y/N), what do you know about the mafia?" He asked, making eye contact with you. You flinched,

"Um...I've watched...the G-Godfather."

"Dios Mio. (My God). Alright, my fault there, I set the bar too low," He said with a grin, "How do you feel about underworld business?"

"Hm...Not sure...what you mean,"

"(Y/N), is there anything you know about the criminal world?" Miguel asked, honestly wondering your innocence. You shook your head,

"N-Not really, just that...it's bad stuff. Um, I-I was always told...t-to keep my nose down...a-and not...not know about anyone."

Miguel raised you chin, his thumb trailing your cheek. His eyes motioned you to come closer, to which you did. Miguel could see the curiosity in your eyes. The anticipation you had the closer to got to him. Miguel kept his hand against your cheek, his body turning to face yours.

"How would you feel if I was one of those bad people?" Miguel whispered, his other hand bringing you waist closer to him.

"Y-You're not...bad to me," You whispered.

"Oh, but I am,"

Miguel's smirk grew wider as he sat you on his lap, his lips drawing closer to yours. Once he had you secured, Miguel stole your lips in a deep kiss. Your lips were soft and your grip was light. It was strange, but Miguel felt a connection.

--------

You trembled slightly as you drew closer to Miguel. Your body was getting hotter as your heart raced faster. Once you were on his lap, you resisted a whimper. His touch was so soft and warm. He was gentle as he stole your lips with a kiss.

You felt weak as Miguel kissed you. His kisses were deep, rough, but somehow kind. His hand held your head while his other held your waist. You could feel your body heating up. Parting your lips for air, you whimpered lowly as Miguel took the opportunity to slide his tongue inside your mouth.

Another whimper escaped your throat as you gripped onto Miguel's shirt. As if he understood, Miguel broke the kiss, letting you catch your breathe.

"Sorry, got carried away there," Miguel whispered, holding your waist still. You shook your head,

"I-It's fine...I enjoyed it." You admitted shyly.

Miguel raised a brow as you stopped shaking. He raised his hand to your cheek again, watching you nuzzle into his palm. He smiled, finally giving into what Peter said. Miguel pulled you into a hug, letting you rest against him as he stared at your shitty cieling.

You belonged to him now. Miguel was going to hold off telling you about his mafia business. As much as he wanted to inform you now, Miguel had to make sure you were secured with him before saying anything. It will take some time though.

"Miguel," You whispered, slowly falling asleep, "I...made you...some pumpkin cookies,"

"I'll make sure to try them," Miguel hummed.

Once you fell asleep, Miguel inhaled deeply. You smelled delicious, probably from your soap. Miguel rubbed your back, his eyes glancing at the rim of your shirt. He wanted to see what you were hiding, but he knew that you needed to tell him.

That and he might lose his temper if there was something he did not want to see.

"Best not to think of that. Let me just enjoy this moment."

Closing his own eyes, Miguel decided to rest. He was comfortable with having you in his arms. This was a first and defiantly, not the last.

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