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blackopals-world · 11 months

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Mouthing Affection

Leona x Vet!FemYuu

NSFW

As part of the smut raffle. This is the prize for the winners.

Sometimes big cats can be big kittens and can't help but show it. Yuu has to deal with a spoiled lion doing everything he can to distract her from her job.

Cat (big cats including) will nip to show affection.

Yuu was busy. She was always busy. Today especially since Coach Vargas asked her to do a health check on all the athletic teams that had beastmen.

That meant mostly patching up cuts and bruises while making sure they took flea and lick medications. That also meant having Vil bring Epel in for a tick check after one was found in the stables.

Currently, Leona was sitting in Yuu's office getting his health screening. Yuu skimmed through her report checking for errors, she knew Leona was perfectly healthy almost ludicrously by human standards. He could benefit from daily multivitamins though.

"Okay, I'll give you a syringe of liquid multivitamins and a liquid IV." Yuu said putting down her clipboard.

"What do I get if I take it?" Leona asked raking a claw down the paper-covered exam table. His smirk taunted the doctor.

"I'll give you a treat. Something I reserve for the most ornery of patients." By which she meant all of them.

Yuu opened a jar with a cat symbol on it on her desk that contained an assortment of colorfully wrapped candies. She pulled out one and put it on the table before taking out the medicine vials.

"I'll take it after you give me the candy." He said leaning back.

"No, after." Yuu said simply without looking up.

"Before and another after." He said more stubbornly.

"No, you can't hav-wait. Where is it?" Yuu began looking through the cabinets for a missing bottle."Shit. The nurse must have taken it to her-stay put till I get back."

Yuu walked out while giving Leona a glare.

Leona just as quickly takes a handful of candies and ate a few just to spite her. He loved messing with the cute herbivore.

The candy was really good. It tasted like mint and melon. It felt warm as it melted in his mouth. His entire body began to feel warm.

Leona's vision began to get fuzzy at the edges as Yuu finally returned. She was focused on finishing her task as she grabbed another oral syringe and measured out another dose. Leona's focus zeroed in on Yuu as her hands moved.

His thoughts focused on how cute she was. His mind repeated it over and over everything he liked about her. Her hair, her eyes, her lips, her hips. All of it was cute-sexy. That sounded right.

"Leona? Hey are you okay?" Yuu asked holding out one of the oral syringes for him to take.

Leona was still aware enough to keep calm but couldn't speak. His tongue felt thick and heavy.

"Leona." Yuu glared "Are you seriously going to make me give it to you myself. Your just as bad as Ruggie."

Leona felt a twinge of irritation at the mention of the hyena. She was supposed to be taking care of him, no other men mattered. He grabbed Yuu's hand and pressed the end of the syringe to his lips.

Yuu sighed as she relented.

"It's not going to taste good but I promise I'll reward you," Yuu said slowly pressing down the plunger.

Leona's nose wrinkled as the medicine filled his mouth. He almost pulled away until Yuu placed a hand on his head. She weaved her hand through his hair and stroked his ears.

The fuzzy feeling returned as he felt a melting warmth in his chest.

"Good boy." She said scratching Leona's ear and pulling way. "Wow, your eyes look dilated. Let me get my ophthalmoscope."

Leona growled at the loss of warmth and pulled Yuu back as she turned around.

"Leona?!" Yuu yelped, her back pressed against the lion's chest.

Leona didn't respond as he pressed his face against Yuu's neck. Her skin was soft, warm and smelled so good. He nipped at her skin affectionately and she tasted so good. He wanted more.

Yuu gasped as Leona licked a long stripe up her neck. He got aggregated when his tongue touched fabric and growled as he began pulling the lab coat off.

"W-wait stop! What's gotten into you?" Yuu wrenched herself from the lion's grasp.

Finally, she noticed the candy wrappers littering the floor. She had bought these from Sam with the assurance that they were full of catnip and would make any ornery cat affectionate. It also had a warning about eating too many. From the wrappers, Yuu guessed that Leona took a bunch to spite her. Typical.

Yuu should have known.

Quickly the doctor examined Leona. His eyes were heavily dilated with more black showing than his usual emerald green. His tail swung back and forth. His claws looked bigger than usual too. They were digging into the padded table like earlier but now they seemed to get sharper.

What was worrying Yuu the most was the look in his eyes. A look that any cat owner knows very well that translated to "I'm being a huge dumbass"

Yuu needed to get Leona somewhere safe before anyone finds out he was drugged. She wasn't explaining to Vargas why his star player is high as a kite. That meant taking Leona back to Ramshackle.

Yuu dropped the clingy lion on her bed and huffed in irritation. It took longer then necessary to get to the dorm.

Yuu had to bribe Ruggie with a jar of her handmade biscuits. He's either eaten all of them or is reselling them to the rest of Savanaclaw. Jokes on him those biscuits ate full of "calming" herbs that are completely legal. Unlike the ones she got from Sam which she has no idea if they are.

The joke might be on her. There might be an epidemic of catatonic beastmen.

Yuu chooses to blame Leona for this.

Leona on the other hand looked very pleased with himself as he lazily rolled on Yuu's bed and rubs his face on Yuu's pillows and getting his scent all over it.

Yuu grabs the pillow to stop him. Leona grabs her wrist and presses his cheek against her palm. The lion made a pleased rumble and encouraged Yuu to touch him more.

"You are lucky you're being cute. Cute doesn't even suit someone like you. I should be angry that you are making me do this." Yuu faked annoyance.

Leona must have known as he grinned wolfishly.

"Get over here." He pulled Yuu down with him.

Yuu yelped as Leona's arms wrapped around her. His face once again buried against her neck. His brown locks tickled her skin and his rough tongue lapped at her collar.

He let out brief heavy sighs that Yuu recognized as chuffing. Leona was very excited.

Leona's mind as fuzzy as everything felt could feel Yuu. Her scent surrounded him, forming a warm blanket around him. Her soft skin was like a pillow and all he wanted to do was sink into her. He wanted her, all of her. By his side.

Yuu knew she should protest. She should stop him. Leona was stronger than her but he'd listen if she demanded it. But he was happy and relaxed right now. She could just wait it out.

So she did or she tried to.

The pair cuddled as they napped. Yuu's hands mindlessly stroked Leona's head. She felt the rumbles that vibrated in his chest. Leona had moved to rest his head on Yuu's chest as his hand pushed under the hem of her shirt to touch more of the dewy skin he craved.

The haze in his made had cleared mostly before turning into something stronger and much worse. An insatiable need but at least he had his mind back.

The moment he realized he had begun to unconsciously attempt to remove Yuu's shirt he pulled out of her arms.

"Fuck!" He growled. It was one thing after another. It was like her body and mind were at war.

Yuu jolted awake before shifting to stare at Leona. She was glad he was back to normal at least. With all their past bickering she should expect he didn't want to remain with her but it still hurt. They weren't bitter enemies or anything, he didn't need to push her way like that.

"You didn't need to be so rough. It's your fault we're here anyways. You should listen when I told you not to eat more than one." Yuu scolded.

Leona pushed his palm against his forehead to ease his stress. His lips curled revealing his sharp canines.

"Stop talking." He growled again.

Yuu was getting agitated too but her instincts told her that Leona wasn't feeling well. Probably recovering from the drug.

"Leona, it's okay. Calm down and let me-" Yuu touched his shoulder intending to check his symptoms. Suddenly she was pinned down with her wrists held captive in Leona's hands.

Leona hovered over her his eyes narrowed into slits and his lips pulled back in a predatory snarl.

"I SAID SHUT UP!" He growled before just as quickly he pulled away like she was burning him "If you know what's good for you you'd stay away."

Yuu was incredulous. One second he's all over her now he can't stand her. Hot and cold.

"You don't get to tell me shit. I'm your doctor if I want to check on you that's my job and I will do it." Yuu glared but the heat of her stare disappeared as she was the pained furrow of Leona's brow.

Despite what anyone thinks she wasn't dense, at least not when it pertained to beasts. They were the only thing she really understood.

When they were in pain it was hard to tell because in the wild looking weak meant death as you'd be the first to be picked off. So animals hide their pain and only an experienced owner/vet could tell when something was off. Likewise, Yuu knew Leona was unwell and it was her job to fix it.

"Leona," She began.

"Stop talking...please." He said through gritted teeth.

"Why?" She asked quieter.

Leona huffed in agitation.

"You're voice. Is sounds so good right now. And whatever was in that fucking candy is going to make me lose it."

"Lose what?"

Just as she said this she caught a glimpse of what Leona was talking about. A firm outline was very visible.

"Yuu," He didn't call her herbivore "You need to leave immediately. For your own sake."

"What about yours?"

"The fuck is wrong with you. I just said you'd be put in danger."

"It's my fault, isn't it? I should help you."

"Can you help with this?" Leona gestured to the prominent shape in his pants.

Yuu didn't make eye contact.

The practical remedy for these things was to let them run their course and in the case of animals like ferrets find them a partner or else they will die of heat. The natural cure as it was. He'll she had to help tend to stallions and bucks during the breeding season when a request for quality DNA for a foal came in. It was just as gross as your imagining. So this was nothing.

I'd didn't make it any less embarrassing. Because Leona was notably a person, a good-looking one at that, and not a noisy smelly beast that is way too pleased with himself while a group of handlers gets him off.

"I don't mind. I can help. I do have some responsibility for this." Yuu mumbled the last part.

"How?" Leona demanded his tail flicked.

Yuu could have suggested her hands or maybe her mouth if she knew what she was doing but she had to say-

"You could use my thighs. They aren't really small." Yuu squeaked thinking about how weird that sounded. I mean who thinks of thighs first.

Leona.

Leona did.

He really liked Yuu's thighs.

With all the consent he needed Leina wordlessly pulled at the vet's pants but was stopped at the underwear. Yuu hesitated before pulling off her undergarments she felt underprepared. He shirt and bra went as well. She felt exposed but she wasn't a coward.

"Let me get some oil," Yuu said blushing as she turned to grab the body oil she used on the nightstand. As she sat up and crawled to the other side she felt hands wrap around her hips and was dragged right back under Leona.

Leona grabbed the bottle roughly before pouring it on Yuu's lap.

Despite his condition, Leona was as gentle as he could manage as he rubbed the oil on her body. Yuu shuttered feeling his large firm hands around her thighs and hips.

Leona quickly removed his clothes and at least now they were in a similar state of undress. Now Yuu didn't feel as exposed as she got an eyeful of Leona.

Despite his sedentary lifestyle, she was unsurprisingly built. Yuu was just as much a fan of muscles as Leona was of thighs.

Now Yuu could see just how big this kitty was and oh boy. He was big. 7 glorious inches and thick. Actually it was a bit knobby? Oh God, it had barbs. Okay not barbs like his animal counterpart, his was softer. It was similar to one of those bad dragon toys. Not that Yuu knew anything about that, that would be weird.

Don't look under her bed.

Leona could smell her arousal and knew she liked what she saw. The desperate desire that flooded her brain eased up a bit at the recognition.

Yuu could feel the smug aura breaking through and spoke up.

"Don't expect to fuck me without a kiss first." She smirked.

Leona made a pleased growl as their lips met in what would be the first of many kisses. He was eager to turn those soft pink lips red and swollen. He imagined them wrapped around his cock plenty of times, mostly during their arguments.

But now those lips were his as he nipped and bruised them as he liked.

Yuu pulled away as she gasped for air before being pulled back as Leona hungrily demanded more.

He pushed his cock between her soft oiled thighs and began to fuck them. Yuu's words of shock were muffled as Leona's tongue distracted her.

She felted into him as every thrust teased her clit as Leona just barely grazed it.

"I wonder if it's tighter inside." He murmured as he moved to Yuu's already bruised neck from earlier. He was turned on by the obvious claim.

He slowly lapped at her chest, taking a nipple into his mouth and suckling roughly before letting go. Yuu let out a shaky gasp as Leona played with her breasts. All the while thrusting against her but not enough to satisfy.

Yuu's excitement waned. It wasn't enough. No more teasing. She wanted him. Now.

Like a demanding lioness, she shoved Leona back. Leona frowned a bit insulted.

"Fuck me. Properly. Now." Yuu demanded.

Now this was something Leona was familiar with. In his homeland, it was always women who demanded sex from their male partners and they were never shy about what they wanted. Something he found annoying when it came to non-beastwomen who played too many games or acted shy instead of saying what they wanted.

It was like an itch that was finally being scratched as he lined up between Yuu's legs. Her gaze was fierce and expecting and all the more exciting. Gods he loved this woman, who else gives as good as they get.

One thing Leona had not realized by this point was that the drug had worn off. It had only two effects the initial intoxication phase and the detoxification phase which he had gotten through with Yuu serving as a distraction to ease the pain. Like a hangover but horny.

Leona slowly pushed into Yuu's entrance and fuck it felt good. Tight, hot, and felt like velvet. If it wasn't for the copious amount of oil he doubted he'd fit this easily. Leona stroked Yuu thighs as they wrapped around his hips.

"Good girl." He praised turning her favorite phrase she used on her patients on her.

Yuu shifted and whimpered. White hot pleasure buzzed through her core. She wanted Leona to do it again.

Leona rocked his hips against her. Yuu didn't get time to catch her breath as Leona began to fuck her. She was right about the barbs. They felt amazing as they stimulated her insides.

"Fuck! Mmnn!" Yuu moaned "Yes! Harder!"

Leona eagerly speed-up making sure each thrust was deep. Watching Yuu fall apart.

"You love this don't you?" Leona asked pulling her against his chest.

Yuu wrapped her arms around his neck.

"Please don't stop." She begged.

Leona rubbed her clit and watched as she cried out. He buried his cock deep inside her as she came. Her back arched as she felt everything at once.

"Leona!" He cried out her voice trembled along with a chorus of whimpers and moans.

But Leona still was satisfied as he fucked her through her orgasm. He adored the expression she made while she was fucked dumb. Her moans sounded less like words and more like whines of a beast in heat. The only appropriate sound for a time like this.

"You love being claimed don't you? Do you want to be mine that badly?" He asked biting her shoulder.

"Yours? Im yours? " Yuu yelped in reply.

Leona's tail twitched in satisfaction as he fucked her with renewed vigor. That was all he needed to hear. Even after he finished he couldn't stop himself before he continued to pound her into the sheets. She was his. All his. Only his. Even when she was sore and crying out for him nothing could change that now.

Yuu was sore and tired and annoyed. She was cuddling Leona again with e weird sense of Deja Vu. Leona was in a much better mood for once.

The sex was amazing of course but she was still annoyed. Yuu tugged on one of Leona's ears to get his attention.

"Just so you know I'm not yours. Your mine got it." Yuu said firmly.

"You said it first." He argued back not leaving her embrace.

The two still found the energy to argue again but this time ina more affectionate manor.

Meanwhile, Ruggie had learned about the effects of canine CBD snacks.

"I can taste colors."

Ruggie was currently on the floor staring at the ceiling but in his mind, he was traveling across time and space.

Ruggie: This edible ain't sh-

#vet!yuu #poor Ruggie #twisted wonderland #twisted wonderland x reader #twisted wonderland yuu #leona kingscholar #leona kingsholar x reader #twisted wonderland leona #twst leona #twst ruggie #ruggie bucchi #twisted wonderland ruggie

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masterofdumb · 3 months

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The Charlie Slimecicle Snacks, Diet, Skincare, Daily Supplements, And Workout RoutineTM

SNACKS

-IF BIG HUNGRY

- Get 1 and 1/2 pound of ground chicken -if still hungry, get another one- can put in low fat tortilla, add cheese, spinach, ect.

-IF SMALL HUNGRY

-Must be Greek yogurt, MAX three times a day, because one time you had too many and your tummy hurt and you kept doing it and your mom said you had to stop -can add fruit and chia seeds-if small hungry but you have already consumed 3 yogurts, then handful of nut -if still hungry, but not enough for ground chicken, enter post-yogurt, pre chicken gathering, aka squirrel mode- squirrel mode until you are hungry enough for big chicken

-EVERYTIME YOU NEED GAS FOR YOUR CAR

-Go into gas station, find refrigerator, find healthy section-Grab packet of two wet hard-boiled eggs, preferably with salt, if no salt, you can get packet of salt from the little table -If sad at gas station, get breakfast sandwich, look at eggs, 50% chance to get eggs, you will know if you want them or not, but even if not, look at them-Every second wednesday, when driving back from therapy, get muffin - not every wednesday get muffin, but always get eggs- look around to see if in sweet or salty mood, then go get the eggs-protein chips

-POST WORKOUT

-Once a week, after workout, treat time-usually a bagel- Asiago bagel, egg, bellpepper, ham, Chipotle mayo, and chedder cheese-can also be breakfast sandwich or muffin-rarely, can be a restaurant you haven't tried, go and get treat

-LATE NIGHTS, AKA YOURE HUNGRY BIT YOURE SUPPOSED TO HO TO BED

-after 9-10, past dinner, back in breakfast sphere- Eggs, turkey bacon, breakfast bites, fruits, ect-make eggs-either scrambled with spinach or cheese, can be with or without a wrap with meat - can also be an omlette- omlette is made with thyme and garlic pepper, NO SALT-can pair with turkey bacon, or finish with yogurt-can justify a 4th yogurt this late-tummy will hurt

-SKINCARE

-every morning and night-apply gentle foaming cleanser -must be specific to you, must work for your skin- once or twice a week, use exfoliating cleanser-for night specifically -apply retinol serum one every 2-3 days-apply 25 hrs peptide moisturizer, not too much, can cause breakout-use a Vaseline like substance on cracked or dry spots, including lips-for morning specifically -use vitamin c serum, paying extra attention to the space under your eyes and any discolored patches-after, use green tea face mask to release toxins, refreshing but unreliable and unsustainable

-DAILY SUPPLEMENTS-step one, two multi viramine gummies-Allegra, for anti inflammatory benefits and allegies-orange flavored vitamin c gummies-2 for 500 milligrams, 4, if on trip, for 1000 milligrams-difficult to overdose on vitamin c-take 1 fish oil pill to cognitive function and slipperyness-last one, a peach vitamin d gummy (best flavor)-if experiencing difficulties with nails and/or hair, or are without assessment to biotin shampoo, use biotin gummies for nails and hair-people will say that multivitamins and vitamins in general, are a scam unless you are vitamin deficit-scientifically, they are right, however, they taste gummy good

-WORKOUT ROUTINE-it is important to keep consistentcy in your workout routine plan-pick a 12 week routine - beginner if you're a beginner, intermediate if you're intermediate, and advanced if you have done other routines in the past-stick with it with for the duration before you make any hasty judgments on its impact-comes in 3 sets, A, B, and C, swithing every four weeks to make sure your body doesn't get used to any one specific movement or routine-Workout A of weeks 1-4-3x hip thrust-barbell, free if available, Smith machine if no other option-3 seated row-cable-three barbell full squat-3 bench press-barbell-reps dependant, 8 if high weight, 12 if lower weight -if you can do 12, move up weight and do 8-3 good morning-barbell-plank-plank-plank-dumbell side bend-band standing abduction-end workout-Workouts B 1-4, C 1-4, A 5-8, B 5-8, C 5-8, A 9-12, B 9-12, and C 9-12- you will become a glutial God-Open app store-install my fitness pal-find macros-need protein if building muscles, 1.5 to 2x body weight in protein grams every day-EAT 2X BODY WEIGHT PROTEIN. GET BIG, LIFT BIG.-EAT 50 EGGS A DAY. YOU WILL BE HAPPY. RIGHT AMOUNT OF PROTEIN IN 50 EGG -EAT 50 EGGS TO BE SAFE-400 GRAMS. IT WILL BE ENOUGH.-IF STILL HUNGRY, TRY YOGURT.

This took so long 😭😭 charlie I think you need help

#slimecicle #charlie slimecicle #qsmp slimecicle #slime #charlie slmccl #the long drive #Eat 50 eggs #Eat 4 yogurts #help 😭😭😭

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multiplicity-positivity · 7 months

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Time for a Check Up!

Hello! How are you doing today? Have you taken care of yourself/your system lately? We’d like to ask you some questions to help you check in with your body, mind, and headmates! This list of questions is not exhaustive - there may be some things we’re missing that are important when it comes to managing your self care. This is just something to get you started if you’re feeling stressed, overwhelmed, or just Bad and need some direction to figure out what’s been bothering you lately.

Physical Health Check Up!

Nourishment: When did you last eat? What did you have for your most recent meal? Have you eaten any fruits or vegetables lately? How about something substantial, like grains, rice, potatoes, or pasta? Or something with protein, like eggs, meat, or legumes? Do you normally take a multivitamin? If so, have you taken one today?

Hydration: When did you last have something to drink? When did you last drink water? Do you have a water bottle or beverage nearby that you can sip from regularly? If you don’t like water or can’t drink it for any reason, how about some milk, juice, coffee, or tea? Any liquids are better than none at all!

Rest: Have you been getting enough sleep lately? Does your sleeping space have everything you need in order to get proper rest? Do you need: a security blanket/plushie, a night light, an air purifier/humidifier, a white noise maker, an extra pillow, a water bottle nearby, or anything else in order to ensure your sleep is restful at night? Are you tired, groggy, or exhausted right now? Can you take a brief, 15-20 minute nap? Can you lie still and close your eyes for a while?

Physical Exercise: When was the last time you got your heart rate up? Is there an exercise you enjoy that you can do occasionally? When have you last stretched your muscles - your hands and wrists, arms, neck, back, feet, and legs? Every body is different, but almost everyone can benefit from regular exercise, even if it’s light! How about taking a walk, doing some squats or sit-ups, lifting some light weights, playing a game or sport outside, or going for a swim?

Mental Health Check Up!

Medical (this could be physical too): Did you take your meds today? Do you need to refill your pills box/dispenser? Do you need to refill any of your prescriptions? Are you keeping track of any upcoming doctor’s appointments?

Mental Exercise: Have you solved any problems/exercised your brain lately? When was the last time you built a puzzle, solved a math problem, or played a word game, sudoku, spot the difference, or other sort of mind-strengthening game? When was the last time you tried to learn something new? Have you had any meaningful discussions, read any interesting books or articles, or used critical thinking lately?

Leisure: When was the last time you did something you enjoy, just for yourself? Have you checked for tension in your body and relaxed your muscles lately? When was the last time you treated yourself with something tasty? Have you listened to some music you love recently? When was the last time you cuddled a pet or plushie, watched a calming/silly show or movie, played a low-effort video game, or done something to decompress and have fun?

Self-Expression: Have you done anything creative lately? Have you recently tried to express your thoughts, feelings, and ideas somehow? When was the last time you journaled? When was the last time you wrote stories or poetry, drawn, sketched, or painted, worked with modeling clay, made a collage, or experimented with another art form? When was the last time you created art just for you or your system, and not for others?

Cleanliness Check Up!

Mouth Hygiene: Have you brushed your teeth today? When you brush your teeth, are you getting your molars, the backs of your teeth, your gums, and tongue? If your toothpaste/toothbrush causes sensory issues, have you tried children’s toothpaste, fruit-flavored toothpaste, and a soft-bristled toothbrush? Have you flossed today? Do you need to use a WaterPik/water flosser or a plastic floss pick to help you floss? When was the last time you used mouth wash? If your teeth are sensitive, do you need special toothpaste to help rebuild enamel?

Body Hygiene: When was the last time you bathed? Do you need a shower chair, bath floor grips, or another accessibility tool to make bathing easier for you? If bathing is difficult, do you have wet wipes handy to help clean under your arms, your groin, and in between folds of skin? When was the last time you washed your face or brushed your hair? When was the last time you trimmed your fingernails and toenails? When was the last time you cleaned your ears? Do you need to change into some clean clothes? Even just a fresh pair of underwear can help a lot!

Living Space: When was the last time you tidied your bedroom, kitchen, bathroom, or other living spaces? Have you checked your house for stray dirty dishes lately? When was the last time you swept or vacuumed your floors, scrubbed your sinks, dusted, or wiped down your countertops? When was the last time you washed your clothes or bedsheets? Can you think of any accessibility tools that might make maintaining your living space easier? Have you considered making a chore schedule to balance out housework throughout the week? Living in a clean home can help improve your mental health and boost your mood!

Relationship Health Check Up!

Inside: How recently have you checked in with your headmates? Is there a member of your system who is struggling more than the rest who you can try to connect with? What have you done lately to help build your relationships and strengthen your bonds with your system members? Have you done anything nice for your headmates lately without expecting anything in return? Have you had any conversations with your headmates one-on-one lately? When was the last time you tried to get to know the different members of your system? When was the last time you communicated your needs to your headmates, and tried to learn their needs as well?

Outside: When was the last time you spoke to your friends and family? Is there anyone you care about who you don’t live with who could use a text or phone call? Have you recently had a good conversation with someone in your life? Have you shared something with a loved one lately? Have you told someone in your life how you’ve been doing lately, or asked how they’ve been doing as well? Have you been communicating your needs and expressing yourself to your friends, partners, family members, or caregivers? Have you let someone in your life know that you love and appreciate them lately?

Wrapping up!

Remember, when it comes to self-care, every little bit helps! It’s better to do something small and simple to take care of yourself, your body, or your system than nothing at all. We hope this post is useful to some of y’all, especially others like us who might struggle to know how to take proper care of ourselves!

Please try to treat yourself and your headmates with gentle kindness today, and remember that it’s okay to not be okay! It’s okay to struggle, and it’s okay to have difficulties with practicing self-care. We just wanted to check in with some questions you can ask yourself to make sure you’ve been meeting your needs. But even if you can’t meet all your needs, we hope that you can do something small to help yourself feel better!

As always, thanks so much for reading, and take care!

#long post #self care #checking in #plurality #pluralgang #actually plural

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inthedayswhenlandswerefew · 1 year

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North To The Future [Chapter 9: A Long December]

The year is 1999. You are just beginning your veterinary practice in Juneau, Alaska. Aegon is a mysterious, troubled newcomer to town. You kind of hate him. You are also kind of obsessed with him. Falling for him might legitimately ruin your life…but can you help it? Oh, and there’s a serial killer on the loose known only as the Ice Fisher.

A/N: While “A Long December” was originally released by Counting Crows in 1996 (and is thus compliant with the 90s theme), the version I listen to most is Girlhouse’s cover from 2022. So maybe check that out. It is a bop!

Chapter warnings: Language, alcoholism, addiction, murder, discussions of sex, a tiny bit of sexual content, Christmas with Momtini and Dadtini, Kimmie making a realization, Aegon making a drink, Appletini making plans, Trent making some killer pool shots, the Ice Fisher getting into the holiday spirit, please enjoy this nice little respite before the events of Chapter 10. :)

Word count: 6.9k.

Link to chapter list (and all my writing): HERE.

Taglist: @elsolario @ladylannisterxo @doingfondue @tclegane @quartzs-posts @liathelioness @aemcndtargaryen @thelittleswanao3 @burningcoffeetimetravel @hinata7346 @poohxlove @borikenlove @myspotofcraziness @travelingmypassion @graykageyama @skythighs @lauraneedstochill @darlingimafangirl @charenlie @thewew @eddies-bat-tattoos @minttea07 @joliettes @trifoliumviridi @bornbetter @flowerpotmage @thewitch-lives @courtenbae @tempt-ress @padfooteyes @teenagecriminalmastermind @chelsey01 @anditsmywholeheart

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You descend the staircase gingery, sheepishly. Your socks slip on the hardwood steps like tires on black ice. You’re trying to avoid your parents, but you can’t wait any longer to eat breakfast or you’ll be late for work. They’re bustling around in the kitchen: cracking eggs, chitchatting, banging plates and pans, cooing over Sunfyre, listening to an R.E.M. album that spins on the record player.

When you walk in, your dad is standing by the stove wearing the apron you got him for his 50th birthday. Pizza Slut, it says. He grins and wiggles his eyebrows. “Hey, ladybug.”

“Oh no.”

“I heard you come home pretty late last night. And then you got right into the shower. Hmm.”

“Hmm!” your mom concurs joyfully.

Your dad nods to the pan he’s hovering over, wielding a spatula. “Salmon omelet?”

You sigh, defeated; and yet, you must admit, you love salmon omelets. “Yeah, sure.” You sit down at the table next to your mom. She’s drinking Earl Grey tea smokey with cream and reading a newspaper: Halle Barry is marrying a jazz musician, Puff Daddy’s Notorious.com is looking for a venture capitalist willing to invest $7.5 million in startup funding, a man was arrested in Times Square for threatening President Clinton, the Nasdaq composite index—fueled largely by the dot-com boom—could hit 5,000 by the end of 2000. You wonder what Aegon’s family is doing right now. Do outrageously wealthy people eat omelets and decorate Christmas trees? Do they hop from store to store in some glitzy metropolitan mall hunting for presents—KB Toys, the Disney Store, Hallmark, Bath and Body Works, Hot Topic, RadioShack, Claire’s, Wet Seal, Yankee Candle—before grabbing a late-afternoon snack at Cinnabon or Sbarro, maybe a smoothie from Orange Julius? Or do they just sit in their mansions under vast unsmiling portraits until they grow dusty and turn to stone: gargoyles, angels, lions bearing their fangs? Are they still human at all?

“How’s Trent doing?” your mom asks. “Still trying to get into the Forest Service?”

“As far as I know. But that’s not who I was with last night.”

Your dad sets an omelet down in front of you, along with a glass of orange juice and one of the same Flintstones multivitamins you’ve been taking since you were in preschool. Jesse used to give me those, you think randomly, recalling the reminders he penned in his clandestine journals. When he was around. When he was sober. Your parents exchange a wary glance. “Oh?” your dad ventures in a squeak, trying to sound casual.

You could lie, but you don’t. Juneau is too small for lies. People know each other too well, they bump elbows in grocery stores and bars and parking lots; they make overly-familiar small talk and inadvertently spill secrets. The last thing you need is someone teasing Trent good-naturedly about your supposed night of passion. He might be dumb, but if he ever gets all the pieces in his titan hands he’ll eventually figure out how they click together. “I was, uh, actually, uh…visiting Aegon.”

They watch you, faces frozen in forced, benign smiles. You pet the top of Sunfyre’s shaggy head with your left hand and stab a fork into the salmon omelet with your right. “Well, that’s great!” your dad manages. “He’s a nice boy, that Aegon. So Greek. And plenty sexy, as we’ve previously established.”

“Is he feeling better?” your mom asks politely, slurping her tea.

“Oh yeah. Much better.” It comes out way too enthusiastic, and hot blood floods into your face. Your parents chuckle…and yet their eyes are troubled, distant, though perhaps in different directions. “Just so you know, things aren’t really working out with Trent. I’m trying to let it fizzle so there isn’t any drama that makes things awkward or creates any…uh…bad blood, I guess. So if you see him around, definitely don’t mention Aegon.”

Your dad does a mock salute. “Got it, General Ladybug.”

“What are Aegon’s plans for Christmas?” your mom inquires. Your dad turns to her, but doesn’t say anything. “It must be difficult for him, being so far from home. Especially around the holidays. I would hate for him to be alone.”

Probably drinking himself into unconsciousness while watching Jingle All The Way and Die Hard. “I don’t know, that’s a good question. I should ask him.”

“He can spend Christmas here with us, if he’d like.” Your mom finishes her tea, sets the cup down on the table, fiddles with it. “We’ll have more than enough food. And we could find a few things to wrap for him so he has presents to open.”

“Now if that’s not holiday spirit, I don’t know what is!” your dad says happily; and if he’s bluffing, he’s good at not showing it. He kisses your mom on the cheek, resting his study hands on her shoulders. She smiles up at him.

You wolf down the last few bites of your salmon omelet, chew your vitamin, knock back orange juice like a shot. “Alright, I should get going, or I won’t be back in time to open the vet clinic at 9.”

“I can always hold down the fort for a few hours,” your dad offers.

“No, that’s okay. I appreciate it, but I don’t want to bother you.” I don’t want to disappoint you. I don’t want to let you down. “You’ve earned retirement. Enjoy all the Judge Judy and Buffy The Vampire Slayer you can handle.” You pet Sunfyre and tug playfully on his ears. His tail wags at warp speed. “Are you ready to go home to your favorite person now? Are you excited?”

Your dad lumbers off into the kitchen. “Here, bring Aegon some breakfast too…” He piles a salmon omelet, a mountain of hash browns, and toast slathered with butter and strawberry jelly into a Tupperware container. You take it and glance out the window that faces the driveway.

“Oh, great. Dad?”

“Yeah?”

“The cow moose is out there licking the road salt off my Jeep. Can you get rid of her?”

“Again?! Okay, I’m on it.” He grabs some pots out of the cabinet and heads outside. You can hear him beating the pots together and shouting: “Goodbye, moose! You live in the woods, not the driveway! Goodbye! Au revoir! Adios, mooseachos!”

At the kitchen table, your mom laughs. She’s still tinkering anxiously with her cup. “Only in Alaska.”

“You’re really alright with Aegon coming over for Christmas?”

“Of course. I’d prefer it, actually. I’d rather know he’s safe. Not alone, not in trouble.”

“Even though he might end up passed out under the tree?”

She smiles: faint, tired, melancholic. “I’ve seen worse.”

When you let yourself into Aegon’s apartment, he’s dressed for work and self-medicating with a rum and Coke mixed in a cereal bowl; it’s the only dish he has that’s currently clean. Sunfyre bolts to him, barking wildly and jumping up to prop his paws on Aegon’s chest as you slide the Tupperware onto the kitchen counter.

“Hey, buddy!” Aegon cries, ecstatic. “I missed you! Yes I did! Who’s a good boy? Who’s a good boy?!”

“Where are you going?” you ask, scrutinizing him.

“Fishing,” he says simply, like this should be obvious.

“I don’t think you should be going back to work this soon. You just got out of the hospital.”

He shrugs. “I need the money.”

“I can give you money.”

“You definitely could, but I don’t want your money, I want my money. Besides, Trent won’t be able to protect my job forever. If I can’t work, Rusty will find someone else who can.”

“Trent,” you echo morosely, staring at nothing in particular.

Aegon downs the rest of his rum and Coke, then puts his bowl in the sink. He walks over to you, his oceanic eyes cautious, his lock of white-blond hair resting on his cheek. “What did he do to you? At dinner, I mean. Before you called me.”

You take his left hand and turn it over, studying the lines on his palm: past, present, future, all in a language you can’t read. You hesitate; you can’t decide what to tell Aegon. You aren’t sure what you want him to know.

“He didn’t hurt you, right? Or try to touch you in a way you didn’t want him to?”

“He kissed me. I pushed him off. That’s all.”

Aegon watches you, eyes severe and glinting. “That’s not all.”

“I tried to break up with him at the restaurant,” you confess. “First he acted like he didn’t understand. Then he got upset, offended. We agreed to slow down, but I’m not sure what he thinks that means. Maybe he’s planning a summer engagement instead of a spring one, I have no idea.”

“You made him angry.” Aegon’s voice is flat, entirely flat, like he’s battling to keep it that way. “I thought we agreed not to make him angry.”

“Well I didn’t do it on purpose, Aegon.”

“No no no, my bad, let me clarify, I’m not mad at you. I just don’t understand why you would be so direct about it. I’ve broken up with a lot of people without actually breaking up with them. You ignore, you deflect, you do the bare minimum, you are intentionally unappealing in every way…and then eventually they move on. That’s the way to go. That’s how you avoid confrontations.”

“I don’t want this thing with Trent to die a slow death.” Oh, perhaps a poor choice of words. “I don’t want to be with him, to even keep up the facade of being with him. I want to be with you. I want to be with you in every way, everywhere, all the time.”

Aegon smiles. He twists his fingers into your hair and touches his forehead to yours and then kisses you, softly and unhurriedly. As he pulls away, he gently bites your lower lip; his fingertips ghost across the front of your throat like a necklace, like a chain. You moan into him, unable to help it. “I won’t go to work if you don’t either,” Aegon murmurs.

“I, an eternally upstanding citizen, definitely have to go to work.”

“Man, fuck capitalism,” he says, and you laugh together.

Something occurs to you. “You didn’t wait for Kimmie to move on. You broke up with her.”

“Yeah, I did.”

“Why?”

“Because I had another candidate in mind for the extremely prestigious position of being my Juneau girl.”

You tuck his hair behind his ear and kiss him again: heat, rum, memories from the night before. Lust stirs up in your blood like ancient silt in seawater. “Please be careful at work.”

“I will, Appletini. I will. Don’t worry. You’re always worrying about things that haven’t happened yet. There’s no point in that.”

“I think I’m just someone who’s doomed to worry a lot in general.”

He grins. “Yes. But I’m your favorite thing to worry about.” He lays his palm against your right cheek and kisses your left: quickly, lightly, like it’s routine, like he’ll be doing it every day for the rest of his life. “Have fun at the vet clinic. Saving all those furry little lives.”

“I’ll see you at Ursa Minor tonight?”

He winks. “I’ll be the one with the electric guitar.”

~~~~~~~~~~

You get stuck late at the clinic spaying Mr. Mark Morehouse’s Flemish Giant rabbit. By the time you rush through the front door of Ursa Minor—bells jangling, a gust of cold wind at your heels, patrons glancing over with vague interest—the band is already performing. Aegon is wearing his cuffed jeans, black combat boots, and, in a radical departure from his usual color scheme, a royal blue turtleneck sweater. He’s braided a section of his hair on the left side of his head and woven a single, small, blue-dyed rose into it. He gives you a subtle nod when he sees you come in, a sly half-smile. He’s singing a punk rock, up-tempo version of Counting Crow’s A Long December.

“I can’t remember the last thing that you said as you were leaving, now the days go by so fast…”

“Heyyy, bitch!” Heather greets you, raising her Sex On The Beach. Joyce and Kimmie are swaying together, brandishing lighters in the air: Joyce smirking and reluctant, Kimmie—a born groupie—shamelessly exuberant. You swing by the bar to get a Bacardi Breezer (blueberry, very good, one of the better flavors) and stand beside Heather. You gaze at Aegon as he strums his battered guitar, and the parallel strikes you for the first time. Aegon too is layered with imperfections: scars, marks, ink, demons with gnashing fangs and needlelike fingers that dangle past their knees. And yet what he gives to the world is so beautiful. And yet he is so goddamn miraculous.

“I can’t remember all the times I tried to tell my myself to hold on to these moments as they pass…”

It takes you a long time to notice that Kimmie is watching you. Something clicks like a dislocated joint popped back into its socket; and that’s the way it’s always been with Kimmie, since she was a child, since she was a five-year-old chasing boys around the playground at recess. The hints pile up—a lot of hints, sometimes years of hints—until eventually there’s an avalanche of realization that hits and drags her under like a rogue wave. She sucks in a breath and her doelike eyes shoot wide open. You try to pretend you didn’t see anything, but that’s not Kimmie’s style. She pushes her way through the audience and grabs your wrist, hauling you away from the crowd. Heather observes this, slurping down her Sex On The Beach, trying to ascertain if you need reinforcements.

“What—?!”

“I didn’t know,” Kimmie says, like it’s an apology. Her eyes are pained and fearful, a deer bathed in headlights.

“You didn’t know what?”

“That you’re in love with him.” Her voice is reedy and trembling. She’s petrified, you realize. She’s afraid that I’ll never be able to be her friend again. Not a true friend, not a pure one. “I swear to God, I didn’t know. I even asked you first. I never would have hooked up with him if I had known, never, never. I’m so sorry. I’m so so so sorry. It didn’t mean anything, it wasn’t like we had real feelings for each other—”

“Kimmie, Kimmie, it’s fine,” you soothe, rubbing her shoulder. She’s wearing a ridiculously fluffy hot pink sweater; it’s like petting a neon sheep. “I’m the one who wasn’t upfront with you. I didn’t think Aegon and I had a chance, so I was purposefully trying to avoid him, to avoid any feelings I had for him. It didn’t work out that way, but…yeah. Anyway. I don’t blame you for anything.”

“Oh my god, so you’re together? Like, together?” Kimmie blinks at you, shocked but not scandalized. You’re not sure it’s possible to scandalize Kimmie.

“We don’t really want everyone to know about it.”

“Oh, because of Trent?”

Now it’s your turn to be shocked. Maybe some of those genius professor genetics made it down the Plinko board after all. “Exactly.”

“Jesus Christ, he’d probably snap Aegon in half if he knew. Like a freaking KitKat bar.”

“That’s a mental image I didn’t need.”

“I won’t tell anyone,” Kimmie swears, empowered by this rare, consequential responsibility.

“I really, really appreciate your discretion.”

“You and Aegon, wow…” She mulls it over, baffled. “So you’re pretty kinky too? I wouldn’t have guessed that. You should have told me! We could have gone shopping together!”

Shopping with Kimmie for fuzzy handcuffs and riding crops and, who knows, probably like vibrating butt plugs or something. I don’t think I’m emotionally prepared for that. I will most likely never be emotionally prepared for that. “Boundaries, Kimmie. Honestly, I haven’t seen that side of him. At least not in my albeit limited experience.”

“Huh,” Kimmie says brightly. “I guess he’s in love with you too.” And then she trots off to rejoin the crowd. Boat #27 has concluded their performance and is accepting cheers of acclaim and complimentary drinks from their adoring fans. Joyce hugs Rob, climbing onto her tiptoes and giggling. Joyce!? Giggling!?!? You grab another Bacardi Breezer before heading over, raspberry this time.

“Hey, babe!” Trent booms when he sees you.

Oh god. Oh no. You shrink away when he throws an arm across your shoulders. Aegon watches this as he approaches, sipping a rum and Coke, eyes like blue embers.

“Right,” Trent groans, like it’s some grave inconvenience, like it’s some passing fad he has to endure. “I remember now. We’re taking things slow.”

The clique assembles by the pool table like battle-ready Power Rangers: you, Trent, Joyce, Rob, Heather, Kimmie, Aegon. “Someone should play!” you say, truly a master of redirection.

Trent flips his hair. “Obviously I’m down.” He looks at you expectantly. You ignore him, drinking your Bacardi Breezer and then pretending to drink it once it’s empty.

“Oh, you are going down.” Heather cracks her knuckles and grins, then picks up a cue stick.

“Battle royal!” Rob announces. Joyce sighs and pulls a fantasy novel out of her purse. Kimmie perches on the edge of the pool table: legs crossed, eyes roving, gold hoop earrings glittering under Christmas lights, seeking attention and drawing it to her like Saturn ensnares moons. A gaggle of bashful men appear out of nowhere to worship her. Dale’s stereo pipes out Mariah Carey’s All I Want For Christmas Is You. Dale himself is wearing a red Santa hat and yawning boredly into the back of his hand.

“I need another drink,” you say, and head for the bar. Aegon follows you.

“You don’t want a Bacardi Breezer.”

“I don’t?”

“No. You don’t.” He flags Dale over once you’ve claimed your seats. “Hey Dale, did you get the stuff on the list I gave you?”

“Sure did.” Dale sets an array of items on the bar: apple juice, lemon juice, florescent green apple schnapps, vodka, a single Granny Smith apple, a paring knife, a shaker halfway filled with ice, a small plate covered with sugar, two chilled martini glasses. “You owe me, though. Especially for the schnapps. I had to order a case all the way from Seattle!”

“Add it to my tab.”

“Which you’ll pay when? In 2023?”

“I’ll pay, Dale!” Aegon insists.

Dale rolls his eyes, but he doesn’t seem genuinely annoyed. “Sure you will.” He yawns again and ambles away to take the orders of some locals sitting at the other end of the bar. The thuds of his boots are heavy and slow on the hardwood floor, the same one Aegon almost died on nine days ago.

“What are we doing?” you ask, but you’re already smiling. You have a pretty good guess.

“We’re making appletinis,” Aegon replies.

“You knew how to make appletinis this entire time and never said anything?”

“Oh no, I definitely did not,” he says. “I found the phone number of a friend I met back in San Francisco and figured she might know. She’s a bartender. So I gave her a call and asked very, very nicely and sure enough, she had a recipe.” He pauses, contemplative. “I told her I was in Chicago. Just in case.”

Just in case his ghost manages to track her down. “Have you seen this friend naked?”

“Does it matter?”

“No,” you say, and you find that you mean it. Aegon is here with you now, and that’s all you can ask for. Still, his commitment to relative honestly seems enduring.

“The answer is yes. But it wasn’t like it is with you.”

“Really, it doesn’t matter. I’m not mad or anything.”

“Yeah, you don’t look mad.”

You smile at each other, Christmas-light sparks in your eyes, alone in a crowded room. Well…alone except for Mariah Carey. “Anyway,” you prompt. “Am I getting a real-life appletini or what?”

“Let’s do this. Uh…” He furrows his brow, trying to remember. “Okay. I think I know how it goes.” He adds apple juice and lemon juice to the shaker. He doesn’t measure; he estimates, splashing in a little at a time until he’s content. He caps the container, gives it a few vigorous shakes, then opens it again. He pours in the schnapps and vodka, then shakes again. “Cut a few slices off the apple, vet lady. Nice and thin.”

You do, four transparent crescent-moon slivers. Aegon rubs lemon juice around the rim of each martini glass with his ring finger and then dunks them in the sugar until the rims are covered in fine white crystals like snow. He garnishes the martini glasses with the apple slices, gives the shaker one last whirl, then empties the contents into the glasses: half for you, half for him. He hands you your introductory appletini and toasts his glass against yours.

“On three?” Aegon asks, and you nod, beaming. You count together: one, two, three.

Your first taste isn’t a tentative sip. You take a full, brave swallow of the vivid green brew. It’s jarringly sour, sticky-sweet, crisp and refreshing like springtime. “Oh, I love it!” you trill.

“It’s…uh…” He takes another investigative slurp. “It’s definitely appley.”

“You hate it,” you say, laughing.

“I don’t hate it,” he counters. “I like what it’s doing to you.”

You close your eyes, the sights and sounds of Ursa Minor fading away. You’re somewhere sleek and vibrant and new; you’re in New York City, you’re in Los Angeles, you’re in Las Vegas, you’re in San Diego. When you open your eyes, Aegon is smiling. “Sorry. I was teleporting.”

“Do you want the rest of mine?”

“Yeah,” you admit guiltily, and he slides his appletini over to rest by yours. You drain them both. “I’m like Jack Dawson. I’m the king of the world.”

“You’re very, very cute when you’re tipsy, that’s what you are.”

“My parents think you should spend Christmas with us. I think you should too.”

“Really?”

“Really.”

“Okay. Don’t buy me anything fancy, though. I won’t be able to return the favor.”

“Sad impoverished homeless man gifts only. You have my word.”

“Hey!” Heather calls from the pool table. She’s waving her cue stick in the air. “I lost! I’m a loser! I got slaughtered by this jumbo-sized motherfucker! And you weren’t even here to witness it!”

“We should go over there,” you tell Aegon, and he steadies you when you wobble as you slide off the barstool. “Oh, god, I’m sorry.”

“It’s cool. Now I have an excuse to touch you.”

“Dale, can I get some Chex Mix or something?” He tosses you a little blue bag from behind the bar. You miss it completely. It sails over your head and smacks into the floor. Aegon cackles hysterically, but fetches the bag. He even opens it before he hands it to you. Then you set off together for the pool table.

“What’s wrong with you?” Heather asks when you arrive, her eyes narrow.

“I like appletinis. I really like appletinis.”

“It’s December 22nd, the commencement of Capricorn season, and you are celebrating this momentous event with an uncharacteristic display of recklessness and frivolity? Inauspicious!”

“What did I miss? Besides your humiliation.”

“Flintstones vitamins,” Rob says, rubbing blue chalk on a cue stick. He and Trent are playing pool now; Trent is showing Kimmie and several of her sycophants, including Matt and Gary, how he can make a shot with his hands behind his back. Aegon circles the pool table, his hands in his jeans pockets, watching Trent reticently. “Childish and stupid or totally acceptable for mid-twenties adults?”

“Totally acceptable,” you declare, munching on Chex Mix. “I just had one this morning.”

“That’s what I said!” Kimmie cries. “They’re delicious. I could eat a whole bottle of them. I used to lie to my mom when I was a kid and insist she hadn’t given one to me yet so I could get extra. My high score was five in a day.”

“That can’t be good for you,” Heather says. “Wait. Maybe it explains some things.”

“A lot of things,” Joyce quips, turning a page in her book.

Kimmie defers to you, the foremost medical authority present. “Vitamins can’t hurt people, right?”

“Well, that depends on the vitamin.”

“Some can,” Aegon says. “The fat-soluble ones, because your body can’t flush them out as easily or something. Too much Vitamin A can really fuck someone up. There are people who’ve died because they ate a polar bear liver, which has, like, millions of units of Vitamin A. So if you ever happen to eat a polar bear, skip the liver.”

“You can overdose on vitamins?” Kimmie asks him, puzzled. “Like, vitamins can kill you?”

“Oh yeah, lots of things can kill you if you take enough of them. Too much Vitamin A can cause seizures and comas, Vitamin D can give you a heart attack, Vitamin E can make you hemorrhage out of your eyeballs and stuff. And it causes strokes.”

“Oh snap!” Kimmie exclaims in horror, thinking that perhaps she barely escaped with her life. Heather is thoroughly amused.

You look at Aegon as he passes by you like a satellite whirling around the Earth, a blinking light in suffocating darkness. He’s right, but he shouldn’t be. He hasn’t studied medicine. He hasn’t studied much of anything. “How do you know all that?”

He replies curtly: “How do you think?” And then he resumes his orbit.

Rob attempts a shot and misses. “Ha!” Trent says, flipping his hair, and then starts lining up his own. As he leans over the pool table, he asks you: “So, where were you last night?”

Your mind, already hazy, goes useless. Cold sweat bubbles up out of your pores. “What? At home.”

“No you weren’t.” His eyes are on you like a wolf’s, like a beast’s. “I called the house. A couple times, actually. I felt weird about how we left things and wanted to apologize. But no one answered.”

“Oh, sorry, I mean I was at home, but then I went to go bowling with my parents.”

“No you didn’t.” Trent’s cue stick hits the striped red ball, number 11, and sends it hurtling into a pocket. “I already asked Dale. He’s in the bowling league, and he said you weren’t there.”

Two lies. And I don’t have a third. You stand there helplessly, surrounded by Christmas lights and tinsel and pine trees, your thoughts churning slowly, slower, dragging to a full stop. The chatter around you dies down. Wide eyes dart between you and Trent. Joyce closes her book. Even Dale is peeking over from the bar. His face is crisscrossed with lines of disapproval, of fascination.

“Where were you, huh?” Trent takes a step closer. He’s huge. He’s so fucking huge. Aegon picks up the black 8 ball off the pool table; no one else notices but you.

“Trent,” Heather scolds her brother, stunned. “Take a chill pill—”

“Where were you?!” Trent demands.

You try to conjure up an excuse, any excuse. All you can think of is how badly you don’t want to end up at the bottom of an ice-covered lake. I can’t die, I haven’t done anything yet. I haven’t been anywhere yet. I haven’t seen San Diego.

Trent begins one final time, still clutching the cue stick, his voice deafening: “Where were—?!”

“She was with me!” Kimmie bursts out, and everyone spins towards her. “I, um, I was upset. Devastated, in fact. Because of, um. Boy problems.”

Heather titters nervously. “What else is new.”

“So I called and I was an absolute blubbering mess on the phone and she offered to come over and hang out. Watch Buffy with me. Do my nails and stuff. It’s really embarrassing.” She smiles at you, a soft glowing smile. “Thanks for trying to keep my secret.”

“No problem, Kimmie,” you reply shakily.

“Oh, babe!” Trent says, his face splitting into a smile, pressing a hand into the small of your back. He even flips his hair in that simpleminded, horselike way. He can’t be the Ice Fisher. He can’t be…right? You flinch when he touches you. On the periphery of your vision, you can see Aegon rolling the black 8 ball back onto the pool table. “That’s all?! You should have told me!”

“It really wasn’t my situation to share.”

“Damn, I’m sorry.” Trent seems to mean it. “I’m really sorry. That was a dick move, I don’t know what came over me.”

“Hulk smash?” Rob says, and there is laughter, quivering with fresh relief.

“I think I have to go,” you say, rubbing your forehead. “I’m really not feeling great.” And that part’s not even a lie. “I shouldn’t have mixed Bacardi Breezers and appletinis, I’m a total lightweight. And I have work in the morning. I’m supposed to vaccinate like ten of Mr. Campbell’s reindeer.”

“You want me to drive you home?” Trent offers.

No! Definitely not! “Thanks, but I couldn’t bear to interrupt your pool game. Especially when you’re winning.” You can tell Aegon is looking at you. You intentionally don’t acknowledge him. And now you realize that you’re a little trapped: you can’t say you’re driving yourself home because you’re not sober, and you can’t say that Aegon is walking you back to his apartment because then Trent might murder you both right here in the middle of Ursa Minor, blood splattering the deer heads mounted on the wall, femurs and vertebrae littering the pool table.

“I’ll do it!” Heather volunteers. “I’m super not-wasted at the moment.”

“Um, well…”

“Come on.” She’s already going to get your parka off the coatrack. “I can’t in good conscience let you vaccinate those reindeer without a full night’s sleep.” You trail after her, powerless to refuse.

Out in the night-draped parking lot, you haul yourself—with some difficulty—into Heather’s Chevy Suburban. And as she turns the key in the ignition and begins defrosting the windshield, you tell her: “When you leave the lot, make a left, not a right.”

“What? Why?”

“Because you’re not taking me home. You’re taking me to Aegon’s apartment.”

“I’m…?” She gapes at you as it sinks in like an anchor through dark surf. “Oh my god. Oh my god…?!”

“Affirmative.”

“Oh. My. GOD.” She puts the Suburban in drive and, as requested, makes a left onto Main Street.

Sunfyre is delighted to see you when you arrive. He leaps, barks, pirouettes in circles, accepts copious scratches and Milk-Bone treats. You collapse onto the threadbare couch, and he stretches out on the floor beside you, his quiet snoring soon the only sound in the apartment. Your eyes blur, flutter, close up shop. Maybe twenty minutes later, you hear a key rattling in the front door.

Aegon walks inside, his boots dripping with snow. He doesn’t seem surprised to see you. “You alright, Appletini?”

“Yeah, I’m kind of woozy but I mostly just wanted to leave.” You consider him, wondering how to ask him the question that won’t leave your mind. It claws at the arched walls of your skull like a trapped animal, leaving streaks of blood where its nails were torn away.

“I don’t want to talk about the vitamin thing,” he says.

“I don’t want to talk about Trent.”

“Deal.”

He throws off his parka and boots, turns on the X-Files, and crawls onto the couch with you. You fold into him and he holds you, not hungrily, not asking for a thing. You freefall into sleep with your head against his chest, his heartbeat a distant roar like thunder.

~~~~~~~~~~

The Ice Fisher has left Juneau a Christmas present: Stephanie Nolan, his fifth victim. She was twenty-five years old, an avid knitter, a Blockbuster employee, mother of several adopted Himalayan cats, one of three sisters born barely a year apart. At least her parents still have some children left, you think. At least the pressure to make their sacrifices worthwhile wasn’t all on her. Your dad sneaks a few minutes of news coverage while your mom is in the shower. They’re replaying the press conference that Chief of Police Eugene Baker gave late last night on Christmas Eve.

“We urge all Juneau residents to remain vigilant. This is the time of year for celebrations and get-togethers, and we don’t want to discourage that in any way, but no one—and I repeat, no one—should be outside alone, especially not after dark. Ms. Nolan left her place of employment to take a ten-minute smoke break, and that was all the opportunity the killer needed. He is still out there, he is still dangerous, and no one is immune from becoming a target. If you have any information relevant to this case, anything at all, please call our anonymous 24/7 hotline at…”

There are camera flashes, uneasy clamoring, flailing hands of reporters begging to be called on. Your dad crosses his arms over his broad chest, his face grim. A reporter asks Chief Baker: “I understand that the Juneau PD has brought in FBI profilers to help them identify possible suspects. Can you share any new theories with the public at this time?”

“Well, there are a couple likely possibilities. The Ice Fisher might be someone who is new to the area, someone who arrived this past summer or early autumn. Residents should therefore be extremely wary of newcomers. However, it might be the case that the killer isn’t new to the area at all, but rather suffered some sort of destabilizing event—loss of employment, for example, or the death of a loved one—that triggered their otherwise dormant violent impulses. The last theory I’m prepared to share today is that the criminal now known as the Ice Fisher might have been active long before this recent string of murders. Some serial killers have been known to…to test the waters, so to speak…with murders that can be camouflaged as accidental or natural deaths. That’s a possibility in this case, and we are combing back through the department archives to see if there are any answers there…”

“I should go pick up Aegon,” you say.

“Ladybug…” Your dad stalls, not wanting you to take it the wrong way. “I’m not saying that I think Aegon is the killer, because I don’t think he is. I know he’s not, actually. He doesn’t have much rage in him. He has a lot of other things, I believe, but not that. I’m just saying…you have to be careful. And he can’t keep an eye out for you if he’s passed out drunk somewhere. Do you get what I mean?”

“I understand, Dad. I’m careful. Really, I am. And I’m never running around town alone. If I’m not with Aegon, I’m with Heather or Kimmie or Joyce.”

“Or Trent,” he adds. He likes this idea; Trent might not be able to snap a murderer in two like a KitKat bar, but he could definitely crack a few ribs. Trent would be a great Mortal Kombat character. He could skewer foes with a cue stick, right through the eye socket. An icy shudder rocks down your spine.

“Or Trent.”

“Okay. Good.” He turns back to the tv, his eyes vacant, his voice low. “Just making sure.”

Aegon is dressed in his Christmas best: dark jeans, black Converses, his hair loose and wavy, a festive red sweater with Gizmo from Gremlins on it. You’ve opted for a more traditional Rudolph turtleneck. Sunfyre has a large red bow tied to his collar. The three of you ride together back to your parents’ house, the radio playing Celine Dion’s O Holy Night, one of the back windows rolled halfway down for Sunfyre.

Dinner is a reindeer roast, rosemary apple stuffing, potato gratin, homemade macaroni and cheese, and creamed spinach; dessert is Christmas cookies eaten under the tree. You open presents as a parade of classics play on the tv: Frosty The Snowman, How The Grinch Stole Christmas, The Year Without A Santa Claus. Your parents give Aegon cold-weather clothing like hats and mittens, which he accepts with great appreciation. He gives them a bouquet of blue roses and three bottles of red wine, only one of which he drinks himself. You give Aegon a refrigerator magnet from Caribou Crossings, a grizzly bear with a salmon caught between its teeth, something to join the rest of his collection, something to help him remember Juneau once he’s gone. He gives you a handful of seashells from San Diego that he’s been carting around in his luggage for a year. Everyone gives Sunfyre Milk-Bones.

When Aegon takes the golden retriever out to the backyard, your dad goes with them. You can see them talking out there as snow falls and the sun sets and the horizon is inked with violet and gold, the wind whipping fiercely: Aegon’s hands moving in wild, dramatic gestures, your dad nodding along. They’re gone for so long you start to worry, your fingers trembling as you and your mom play chess with the new set you received for Christmas, not black and white but pet-themed: one side dogs, the other cats.

Your dad comes back inside first. He shuts the door and says to you, not accusatory but merely intrigued: “I didn’t know you were serious about wanting to travel, ladybug.”

“Oh, yeah, I guess so. One day. When I’m retired, I guess. Doesn’t everyone want to travel?”

“Huh. Aegon made it sound a bit more urgent than that.”

He watches you defeat your mom in chess, makes her some mollifying Earl Grey tea, and then offers to play Scrabble with her, a proposition she can never resist. When Aegon brings Sunfyre back inside—the sky fully dark now, the stars rising behind the veil of clouds—you lead him upstairs to your room. You sit on your bed together and flip through your travel magazines, scenes of Paris, Cairo, New York City, Rome, Tokyo, Cape Town, Buenos Aires, Beijing, Saint Petersburg, Sydney, Las Vegas, Cusco, Athens, Mexico City, Nairobi, California.

“It’s strange,” Aegon says. “Your parents like me, but they also kind of don’t like me. It’s as if they’re afraid of me. I can’t figure them out.”

You think of the cardboard box under your bed, the one full of Jesse’s journals. “My mom was married before. Vince is her second husband.”

Aegon looks over at you, attentive but not understanding. “Okay.”

“I was five years old when they got together. So Vince is my dad, but he’s not…like…he’s not biologically…well, you get what I’m saying.”

Aegon closes the magazine he’d been skimming, still looking at you.

“My mom’s first husband was named Jesse. And he was…from what I understand…he was a lot like you.” You tap your index finger against the crook of your own elbow so Aegon will understand. He was brilliant, but he was an addict. He was a blessing, he was a curse.

Aegon nods slowly. “I guess that explains a lot.”

“I probably should have told you sooner. But I’ve never really told anyone.”

“What happened to him?”

“He drowned in the channel. Maybe it was an accident, maybe suicide. Maybe it doesn’t matter which one. Maybe there isn’t much of a difference.”

“I’m so sorry,” Aegon says, his voice quiet and gentle.

“I don’t want the same thing to happen to you.”

“It won’t. I told you. I’m not that easy to kill.”

You wonder if Aegon has become a ghost to his family, if he haunts the Targaryens like Jesse haunts you, half-comforting, half-heartbreaking, if after six long silent years his shadow still lurks in corners and doorways. You wonder if a ghost is really so far from what you are. “I want to stop feeling like a potential person, to stop waiting for the life I’ve always dreamed of to drop out of the sky. I want to feel real.”

“You’re real to me.” He dusts his thumbprint across the curve of your cheekbone, flesh and blood that sing to each other. “Listen, we’ll go to San Diego together.”

“Don’t, Aegon.”

“No, I mean it,” he says. “Give me a month to save up, and we’ll go. We’ll take a long weekend and fly down there. It won’t be hot enough to swim, but it’ll be warmer than here. Sixties, sunny, sandy, waves and tacos. We’ll stay somewhere with a waterbed. Those can be a lot of fun.”

“Careful. I might not want to leave the hotel room. What a waste of a trip that would be.”

“I’ll just have to make sure you’re bored of me by then,” he purrs, grinning and mischievous, dragging you into his lap. He smooths your hair back from your face, gazing up at you as you straddle him. He kisses your lips, your jaw, your neck; his teeth skate across your skin without biting down, without leaving indigo bruises of ownership. Slowly, he turns solemn and hushed. Slowly, you begin to worry about him.

“What, Aegon?”

“You’re the best present I ever got. I hope you know that.”

You whisper through his windswept white-blond hair: “Then open me.”

He lays you down on the bed, unearths your needful bare skin and stifles his moans against your throat, unravels you like a blood-red ribbon from a box heavy with secrets.

#aegon ii targaryen #aegon ii #aegon targaryen #aegon x you #aegon targaryen x reader #aegon targaryen x you #aegon targaryen ii #aegon targaryen ii x reader #aegon x y/n #aegon x reader #aegon ii x you #aegon ii x reader

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financeprincess · 10 months

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It is so inspiring hearing about your weight loss :) i was wondering if you had any particular weight loss tips you’d like to share? I went through a period of weight loss myself, but have lately gained back a lot of what I’ve lost and I’d like to know if there’s anything that helped you get back on the wagon. Love your blog btw!

Don’t be too hard on yourself, its rough out here especially in the US. it’s easy to accidentally slip up and gain 15 pounds just by eating a lil extra every day.

Some things that helped me:

Intermittent fasting, only a 13 hour window though. The 16:8 was too much for me and with women it can screw with your hormones if you’re not careful.

Drinking lots of water. Like a ton. I put those hydration multiplier electrolyte packets in my water as well.

Get good quality sleep. I got some Brooklinen sheets and they are 100% worth it. Definitely improved my sleep quality. I also have a really nice down duvet and an Egyptian cotton cover for it. I also have a silk eye mask and a silk pillowcase from Slip that I love. Sleep is extremely important.

Get 10k steps a day or at least just walk as much as you can. I’m sedentary a lot for school/work/etc. so I absolutely have to get out and walk and get moving. Even if you just aim for a mile or two a day it’ll greatly help.

If you don’t want to lift weights that’s okay. It’s not for everyone. I used to be super into powerlifting and got pretty muscular but it doesn’t excite me like it used to. I do a mix now of walking, jogging, pilates, rollerblading, cycling, kickboxing, swimming, yoga, ice skating, and weightlifting. That way I’m never bored and the variety allows me to choose what I want to do.

Consistency is key. Doing 4 workouts a week at a light/medium intensity is better than doing 1-2 a week of super high intensity and burning yourself out. Every little bit helps.

I do a full body stretch every day. This is super important. Our bodies get so stiff during the day. If you don’t stretch this can lead to injuries when you try to do other things.

I love the sauna (and hot yoga too). If you can find and afford a gym that has a sauna, I would highly recommend. Sometimes I will just go and walk on the treadmill for 30-45 minutes and watch YouTube videos and then sit in the sauna. It’s the best.

Make sure you’re not deficient in anything. Take a complete multivitamin and get blood work done. I was severely deficient in vitamin D and it was making me depressed. Once I took a supplement, got more sun and got my levels up it really helped my overall health.

Cut out grains, sugar, junk food, fried foods, etc. and just eat real foods. Anything with a long ingredient list usually isn’t a good idea. It’ll take a minute to get used to it but once you start eating almost exclusively vegetables, fruits, proteins, and healthy fats you won’t miss it. I have such a big sweet tooth sometimes I’ll have to eat like five servings of berries with a few tablespoons of honey just to satisfy it, but that’s better than ice cream or candy any day.

Don’t deprive or starve yourself. I eat as healthy as I can manage 80-90% of the time. But every once and a while I will eat a huge plate of pasta, gelato, tiramisu, croissants, those types of foods that I love. It’s not helpful to punish yourself and you gotta live a little.

I got a smart scale in my bathroom, the one I got is from FitIndex. It has an app that connects to your phone and it syncs to other health apps. it shows you body fat, muscle mass, water weight, everything. Honestly super triggering at first because I felt called out lol but now I step on it once a week just to make sure I’m on the right track.

You do not need a gym membership to workout. YouTube is the best. I love Yoga with Adrienne, MadFit, Move with Nicole, Charlie Follows, Vicky Justiz, and there’s a bunch of others. Find what you like and try to stick with it as much as you can.

Rest is super important. Don’t run yourself ragged. If you’re sore don’t force yourself to workout.

MyFitnessPal is super helpful. If you have a history of disordered eating this might not be for you but it’s good to be conscious of what you’re eating. Figure out what you need to lose fat/maintain/gain muscle and then track to see where you’re at and adjust accordingly.

Eat more protein. Protein, healthy fats, and fiber keep you full. You will be starving if you eat only salads. Fruit smoothies with protein, protein oats, salmon, yogurt, eggs, etc.

Get cute workout gear. It makes it more fun for me to workout with my pink towels, my pink hydroflask, my lululemon yoga mat, I have a baby blue jumprope and pink dumbbells and pastel colored resistance bands for at home workouts. A lot of my workout clothes are from lululemon, alo yoga, free people, and aerie. I have some of those blender bottles in cute colors for preworkout, protein powder, super greens powder, electrolyte mixes, etc. Some of this stuff is pricy but I’d rather be investing in my health than paying medical bills down the road so it’s 100% worth it to me.

The only way to see permanent change is to make it a lifestyle. Unfortunately you can’t just go back to eating unhealthy foods once you hit a certain goal. Those models who say they live exclusively off of pizza and pasta and cheeseburgers are lying through their teeth. It’s perfectly healthy to have days off where you indulge or don’t exercise but most of the time you’ll have to find ways to eat healthy and exercise and prioritize your health.

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oh-saints · 1 year

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I don't know if you are accepting requests, but having kids with Ruben Dias would include?

hello i have just deceased and come back BCS DAD!RUBEN??? HUSBAND!RUBEN??? I AM SPIRALLING

just think of the dog being the kid I AM-- BUT

you know you want to build a life with rúben when he volunteered to babysit your nephew together with you, despite the fact he'd only played a match 3 hours prior

he came over as soon as he could because he didn't want you to bear the burden alone

he proved to be a better babysitter than you are, the auntie??? he's more patient with your nephew and the little one seemed to enjoy your boyfriend's company more because the footballer's endless energy to run around the house

and he proves to be an excellent husband too, now that you're pregnant with his child

he holds your hand whenever you go for check-ups and ultrasounds, and whenever he's away for those sessions, he makes sure he video calls you during the whole ordeal

the baby's heartbeat is his ringtone now

he brings home whatever you're craving and he's had your ob/gyn's number on his speed dial, just in case

he doesn't stop rubbing your feet and stroking your back, as well as saying affirmation words, when you're in labor

he kisses your temple and saying thank you endlessly as soon as the baby's born and not wanting to leave your side except to check on the baby's fingers and feet for the first time

he's the one who researches and shops all these multivitamins and other meds to prevent you from getting mastitis (or the disease where your breasts are swollen and cannot produce milk)

he NEVER lets you wake up in the middle of the night, the whole night milk is trademarked for his and his only, saying it's the only time when he can spend time together with his baby, and bath & diaper duty are HIS DUTY

he openly admits he likes being a father and would like to have another one but he also says publicly that the whole decision is yours because it's your body

yep, you definitely choose the right guy

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neurodiverse-adulthood · 7 months

Text

Nourishing with a Low Appetite: Primary Edition

Inspired by low appetite & a lifelong complicated relationship with nourishment.

Sufficiently nourishing is critical to wellness and functioning. It can be hindered by disordered thoughts & habits, brain-body disconnect, and low appetite. This list is meant to help with nourishment and weight care!

Many of these get at efficiency. Aim to get in maximum caloric & nutritional value per bite, since you can't take many. > I am not a professional-- just a struggling ND adult trying to put their Bachelor degree in psychology to good use!

x x x x x x x x x

↖️ Top left: Meal bars

high nutritional concentration, low spoon use

⬆️ Top middle: Fruit & vegetable pouches

hydration & nutrients, enjoyable & sensory-easy format

↗️ Top right: Ready-made microwave meals *

filling & substantial, high nutritional concentration, low spoon use

⬅️ Middle left: Multivitamins

high nutritional concentration

🫵 Middle middle: Fruit popsicles

hydration & nutrients, enjoyable & sensory-easy format

➡️ Middle right: Reminder app

keep on track, combat inattention and interroception

↙️ Bottom left: Eating affirmations

helps make eating feel safe & okay, improve relationship with body & food

⬇️ Bottom middle: Nutrition drink

high nutritional (& caloric) concentration

↘️ Bottom right: Accessible food prep/storage

Keeping food, supplies, & appliances in your "safe space" (e.g. next to your bed) lowered spoon use, helps make eating feel safe & okay

* brands for vegans and vegetarians: Saffron Road, Annie Chun, The Good Bean, Loma Linda Brand, Somos, Fillos, Tasty Bite, Healthy Choice, Marie Callender's

See also: upcoming tummy and digestive care posts, low appetite secondary edition

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ghosttownwherenoonegoes · 1 year

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A few people - @badgirlforeddiemunson @thefreak0fhawkinshigh @ilovecupcakesandtea - have asked me things about my hair; routines, products, hints and tips. And I figured it'd be easier to make a generic post with everything included and people can pick and poke at what they want.

I'm not a vain person, but I will freely admit that my hair is my pride and joy. It is my baby. I have told my mother that my hair is the only grandchild she's ever gonna get from me, and now when she helps me with it, she calls it "babysitting my grandkid".🤣

I have quite fine hair but I have a lot of it, so it's quite thick. Holding it in one fist is a bit difficult and it knots very easily. This post includes routines, products, hints, tips, and things I think are relevant. My hair is my baby and a lot of my leftover energy between my job and my degree goes into my hair. I've dreamed of having hair just like this since I was a child - maybe seven or eight - and now as a twenty five year old, I am living the dream.

I hope those of you who are curious about my rather extensive hair care find what you need in here! I am open to questions about it, as well.💖

TW; in the 'basics' section, there is one mention of actual physical assaults related to non-consensual hair-cutting which happened in my home town about a decade ago. Not to me, but I worry about it every day as a lasting point of anxiety. If you want to skip this, it is the LAST BULLET POINT OF THE FIRST SECTION RIGHT BELOW THE CUT.

Okay, so... where to start...

The basics/equipment I use

I sleep on silk pillowcases and I secure my braids with silk scrunchies. It helps to prevent knots and tangles (it's not perfect, but my hair is much more manageable thanks to silk).

I use a wooden comb and a boar bristle brush which moves natural oils from my scalp down to the ends of my hair. I would never be using a plastic brush or 'normal' elastic ties in my hair. The thought makes me shudder.

I wash my hair once a week unless it gets rained on. In which case, I will wash it more than once a week, but neither me nor my hair will be happy about it.

I pat-dry my hair with a plain white cotton t-shirt and I let it air-dry, which takes about twelve hours to become damp-but-dry-enough-to-safely-brush. (Hair wash day is a whole ordeal, I need a day! More on this to come.) T-shirts are gentler and less damaging than towels; wet hair should be treated like glass because it's very fragile.

I never go outside of the house or go to sleep without first brushing and then braiding my hair. I never go outside with it down. This is because, honestly, I'm terrified someone will come up behind me on the street and assault me by cutting all my hair off (I have severe anxiety but also, this actually happened to a few girls in my town as a series of three assaults when I was a child and I've never forgotten about it) but also, doing this helps to prevent knots and tangles, which minimises damage to your hair.

I eat a lot of meat and dairy but I also take a generic multivitamin every day. Protein and fat are super good for you in general but also, what your body doesn't use, goes to your hair!!! Happy body = happy hair.💖

I am very precious about my hair, very few people are allowed to touch it. If I let you touch it, you are trusted. It's pretty much an "I love you". My mum helps me with my hair every day. I'm very grateful to her for it, and I make sure she knows how much I appreciate it.

My hair only needs a half-inch trim every eight months or so; dad measures it out with a ruler, mum watches him to make sure he's doing it right, he shows me what he's cut off after the first snip and I'll approve it and then he's allowed to continue. I cry a lot when it has to be trimmed, I hate it, and I grieve that half-inch until it grows back in about three weeks.

My different hair-care routines (these are extensive)

Hair wash day!

Number of stages: 4

Duration of all four stages: 13 - 14 hours🥰 (I have to schedule an entire day to do it and it can be tricky because my job doesn't always align with my preferred wash day, which is a Sunday, so sometimes I have to go 10 days without washing it and that can make me very irritable. It's the little things, you know? It has to be an all day thing because my hair takes twelve hours to become damp-dry enough to brush without damaging it. I never use heat on my hair; pat-dry with a t-shirt and then air-dry only. And then I have the brushing routine on top of it, which takes an hour if I do it myself, and ten minutes if mum does it for me, which she often does).

Brushing routine:

I brush my hair before I wash it. This is the first stage of hair wash day, and I do this routine after work. It takes me an hour to do it alone or ten - twenty minutes if mum does it.

I section my hair in two, over each shoulder, and then section it again so that my hair has been quartered. I always brush from the back first (I tuck the front section underneath the back section, which has been pulled forward to the front). Whichever side isn't being brushed, I secure into a side-ponytail with a silk scrunchie to hold it there while I work on the other half of my hair.

Starting from the bottom, I finger-comb first and manually untangle any big knots or tangles. If this part goes wrong, I will cry about it. It's instant panic attack if I can't get a knot undone with minimal effort.

Once that quarter-section is finger combed thoroughly, I then use my wooden comb to go through the section again and I alternate as needed back to finger-combing if I find a section I missed the first time.

Once that quarter-section is done, I put it behind me and start on the other section, same process as above. Doing one half of my hair usually takes me a half hour.

Once one half of my hair is brushed, I use a boar-bristle brush, going from the top of my hair down to the tips; this moves the natural oils through the hair. The oil normally comes down to just below my ear, and obviously the further away I am from wash day, the more oil there is, and so from the nape of the neck down to the very ends of my hair, I apply Mielle's rosemary and mint scalp and hair strengthening oil (£8.99 for a 59ml bottle; half a pipette is sufficient for one half of my hair, so it's expensive but does last a while).

Once the hair is finger-combed, combed, brushed, I then pull that section back as well and braid it in a simple three-strand braid and loosely tie it with a silk scrunchie. The first few patterns are tight to hold the braid, but after that, I loosen it off so it's a loose braid and loosely tied. In the morning, I'll redo my braids as needed before I go to work without brushing them - I don't have that time in a morning to do my whole routine before work. To secure it, I tie the silk scrunchie around one more time so it's tighter and will hold longer (bedtime braid: tie it around three times / morning braid before work: tie it around four times).

Repeat this whole thing again for the other half of my hair, and then I can go to bed. A normal night, this takes an hour, a bad night as in really knotty hair or I'm tired, two hours. Unless mum helps me with it. I can and will cry if I find a knot I can't immediately undo and it's not unusual for me to be swaying at the bathroom sink because I will not go to bed unless my hair is fully brushed, oiled, braided.

If it's wash day, I don't braid my hair or apply more oil, I just finger-comb, comb and then brush it and then get in the shower...

Washing routine: Okay. This is the most in-depth and complicated part of my entire thing I do for my hair, and I have to get it right or I will have an anxiety attack thinking I've just fucked all my hair up and I have to cut it off (I catastrophise a lot, especially with my hair). This is the second stage of hair wash day.

So, hair is brushed, shower time!

I have the water lukewarm - too hot will burn your hair and damage it, but too cold and you won't be able to get the oils out properly.

I get my hair wet so it's plastered to my back, and then I use L'Oreal's Dream lengths shampoo; I apply it to my scalp and to the surface of hair up to the nape of my neck, giving myself a gentle scalp massage (treat wet hair like GLASS!!!!). I rinse it all out once it's all in there, and then I use the same brand of conditoner, which is applied from the nape of my neck down to the very tips. Leaving that conditioner in, I then shampoo the scalp up to the nape of my neck a second time (it's like a greasy pan - the first lot of washing up liquid lifts the oil, the second lot of washing up liquid actually cleans the pan - same concept applies here to hair, especially because I only wash it once a week). And rinse that off too.

Then, I apply conditioner for a second time from the nape of my neck to the very tips of my hair, wiping off any excess on the top of my hair (just below the scalp so I don't clog my pores). I leave it in there while I wash my body, which takes a few minutes, and then I wash it off again. I let it all come out, and then I change the shower temperature so it's now COLD, to effectively close the pores in my hair.

My hair is washed! I pat it dry with a cotton t-shirt, then from the nape of my neck down to the halfway mark of my hair, I apply a leave-in conditioner, then from that halfway mark through to the ends of my hair, I use one pipette of the oil to cover everything, and then my hair air-dries for twelve hours until it's damp-dry enough to safely brush, as above!

Using oils and leave-in conditioner:

I use the oil every day from the nape of my neck to the ends of my hair, and every few days I apply leave-in conditioner from the nape of my neck to the ends of my hair. The top section of my hair (scalp to the nape) will be fine, it has the natural oils from the scalp, which is evenly distributed by using the boar-bristle brush.

Brushing routine: After twelve hours, I brush through my hair as in the first stage of wash day, so this is now stage three of wash day for me, and braiding it is stage four!

And finally, a picture of my baby!!! This was taken about two weeks ago and I believe it was the day after wash day!😍💖

I love it (her) so, so much. I bitch and complain often about the knots, but nothing fills me with instant grief and abject horror quite like thinking about having to cut off more than a half inch. That, in itself, is already cause for tears. My hair is my pride and joy, my favourite body part, and something I cherish as a very real, long-lasting childhood dream. I hope you find what you need in this post; I know it's not applicable to everyone because we all have different hair types and budgets, but hopefully something is useful.💖

I'm pretty sure this is everything but I might reblog with additions if needed, and I'm open to questions as well! My hair was jaw length in late 2019 when I started to grow it out, so it's grown quite quickly and I'm very in love with it.🥰

#haircare tips #haircare #hair growth

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