eye test scheduled :DDD

I am in fact here to scream some more. THE MOVING IN! SO CUTE! GRIAN MEETING JELLIE FINALLY - The Book TM oh my god. Scar is feeding it grocery store romance novels you just like. Know he is. Also please know that I just went to check my email because I'm waiting on something and immediately dropped literally everything I was doing to read this.

ALSO YOU SNEAKY, CHEEKY PERSON WITH THE LORE CH 2????????/ First of all how dare you second of all how dare you. It's so CLEVER how it managed to explain why it isn't so simple for Scar to just be turned and for it to fix everything but i am pulling out my hair and gnawing at my arm with very sharp teeth because AHHHHHHHHHHHHH

Also Tubbo looking and Grian and being like 'Yeah im gonna ask him for advice' AHHHH YES. YES! MUMSCARIAN GROWS CLOSER WITH EVERY UPDATE! But also poor tubbo trying to figure out what to do bc he wants to be an adult but he doesn't want to be gone and lose his dad im????? hi welcome to weirdly relatable because im in my twenties but my mom is in her seventies and i have Those Kinds Of Thoughts often, the catharsis with that entire conversation was UNMATCHED frankly. Tubbo I love you.

Also the way Grian's brain ticks is just. Magnificent. Bless him. Relatable. 'I found a solution why does no one recognize my genius - oh.'

AND THE DANCING - First of all Doc making a cameo to build a portable jukebox for this specific scenario is so funny to me 'I got it but i dont wanna talk about it i just wanna dance' grian you little bird brain. MUMBOOOOOOOO LEADING THE WAYYYYY. THE TWO OF THEM FULLY AWARE THEYVE GOT IT FOR SCAR AND GRINNING AT EACH OTHER WHILE SCAR IS JUST SAT THERE LIKE "Wow that's nice. Wish I had that. Love my friends" ASDFGHJK Grian just plopping himself into Scar.

Can we talk about how Scar is so oblivious that he only notices how often Mumbo and Grian hold him/touch him/touch his hair if they do it for 'too long' see also mumbo catching him last fic. Scar. S c a r. You literally keep thinking "our coven - their coven." scar you oblivious little elf.

S C R E A M I N G the way they just pass Scar along. PLEASE. FOR THE LOVE OF GOD. *OH MY GOD* listen if they dont get together soon i am going to go insane I am kicking my feet and being dragged to hell 🤣

AHAHA hello again <3 YASSSSS GRIAN MEETS JELLIE <3 Fun fact but in the original draft this was the first time he even found out about Jellie at all but since they went to Aqua Town I changed it to the first time he met her <3 HJFSDJKFHJDJK at least it wasn't 13k+ this time :'3

I AM PHYSICALLY INCAPABLE OF DROPPING IN LITTLE LORE BITS <3 YEAH hjfgdsjkfdgj cuz like THEORETICALLY.... Theoretically it checks out but how would it work with someone who is both Natural and Supernatural what if it actually makes things worse what if- hjgfdjk there's a lot of what-ifs there <3

Tubbo was like "this is a person who Gets Me (see Midnight Strolls and them being chaos gremlins togethers) and cares about my dad I will ask him for advice" hjfsdjkfk YEAH huge mood hfjkfds he wants to branch out and live his life and be an adult but at the same time it's like <3 he's painfully aware and it scares him he doesn't wanna lose time with his dad hjfdskjk I can understand the fear too </3 My stepmom's the closest thing to a mom I have and she's almost seventy now </3 I adore this boi <3

LMAO Grian forgetting to look at the big picture, relatable <3

YESSSSSS THE DANCING <3 HJFVSJHKVFJKS to be FAIR it was more of a callback than anything <3 but also having an inventor friend is pretty convenient when you're about to get in the middle of a nasty conflict right? He wants to DANCE with his MENS in their CLEARING he has his priorities straight they're both so pretty and the night is so nice~ HJFSHJKFSHKJFS Scar just like "aww they're so sweet and pretty I love them so much wish I could join them <3" and they just >:3 gonna give him everything lmao "Wanna dance?" jhgfdjkkfd

HHGHGASHGA YEAH LMAO he's just so comfortable with them now that it only really occurs to him that "hold up it's been a minute what-" kjfdskfdskl this boy someone get him some self-value so "they're into me" isn't the absolute last thing he thinks of <3 yesssss their Coven hhfdjh

HFKSHFJKS if that dance scene doesn't sum up their relationship dynamic I don't know what will LMAO <3 You will be very happy soon I think <3 just gotta go through some pain first <3 :D

Hey can you make a Agatha x reader where Wanda hurts the reader on accident and Agatha goes full witch and kicks wandas butt and then flys reader home and takes care of her wounds please. Love you fics by the way.

Aww you're so sweet. Thank you so much, love! I had so much fun writting this ❤.

I got another request for Agatha with a vampire reader so i decided to do both in one. I got a little carried away tho, so there will be at least two parts. Let me know of want more. Hope you like it!

Share my infinite (Agatha x Fem!reader) part 1

“Thank you” you said to the man in front of you as you left the grocery store and walked to your house. It was a pretty day in Westview, as always. The sun was bright, the birds were singing, the grass was green and everyone was trapped in a horrible pain inside their minds. Yeah. Beautiful. 

You sighed and groaned, covering your eyes from the light as you kept walking. God, you hated being here. Sure, it was nice at first, having the opportunity to see another scenery, one different from the forest you lived in. But having sun all the fucking days? Your worst nightmare. You loved being in the dark, the rain, the grey sky. It calmed you like nothing else could, with the exception of your girlfriend. 

You smiled at the simple thought of her. You and Agatha had been together for the past 100 years, and every single day, you fall in love with her a little more. How could you not? She was smart, passionate, funny, beautiful and powerful. You knew she wasn’t exactly a good person, but you weren’t an angel either, and she was hot so she could get away with it. She was just perfect. 

And she was so patient with you, always teaching you new things and happily answering your questions about everything. She even taught you some magic tricks, even if you weren’t a witch. Actually, you thought it was one of the things she liked about you, she could teach you everything about her culture because you were not part of it, which meant you always found everything she told you pretty amazing.

But, it was also one of the things she feared the most. You not being a witch, meant you weren’t biologically immortal like her. Somewhere on your genealogical tree was a dark secret. You had vampire’s blood on your veins. Just a little part that allowed you to heal quickly and age pretty slowly, but you were not a full vampire either, and still had a date of expiry. And that knowledge broke Agatha’s heart.

She has been trying to find a way to make you immortal like her, but she hasn't found one yet. That’s why she was always so protective of you. She was already fighting against time for you, so the thought of you being injured and taken away from her even sooner, scared the hell out of her. 

When she felt a strong magic coming from this part of the world, she decided she needed to know what it was, because maybe, just maybe, this could be the answer she needed to make sure you’ll stay with her forever. 

You chuckled at the memory of her trying to convince you to come with her. Of course you would have come even if she didn’t ask you to, but you always found too cute how her baby blue eyes lit up with hope whenever she found something that, perhaps, could give you eternal life. It made you feel so special, that Agatha loved you enough to keep searching for a way to make you immortal, even after all these years. 

“Y/N!” a little voice came from behind you and you turned to see Billy and Tommy walking up to you, bright smiles in their faces. You waited til they were by your side and smiled too. 

“Hi boys, how are you?” you asked while they hugged you. The twins were the only other thing besides your precious witch that helped you endure Wanda’s ordeal. They were pretty good boys and they adored you and Agatha Agnes, they even called you “aunties” sometimes.

“We’re fine, you? How 's aunt Agnes?” Billy asked and you smiled. He had always bonded better with your girlfriend, while Tommy was totally yours. 

“She’s fine, thanks” you answered “what are you two doing here tho?” you asked and frowned a little. It was strange for them to be wandering around by themselves. 

“Mom and dad are arguing, again” Tommy said and shrugged. Your frown deepened. 

Wanda and Vision had been arguing a little too much lately. You knew it all started because of Agatha, who wanted Vision to be conscious so it could distract Wanda and let her be closer to her and her magic, but this, you were sure it wasn’t just Agatha. This was Wanda losing control of her own ilusion and it was hurting her sons.

“Well, my arms are getting tired, so why don’t you help me and we can make a cake with Agnes when we get home?” you asked jokingly and their faces lit up. You just had bread and milk on your arms, but that was enough for them. They just wanted an excuse to spend time with their aunties.

You chuckled when Tommy took the milk from you while Billy took the bread. Each one of them took one of your hands and the three of you walked home. Deep in your heart, you knew these kids weren’t even real, or at least, they were not supposed to be real, and when the time comes, you’ll be heartbroken to say goodbye. But for now, you’ll enjoy the time you had with them.

This thought made you think of Agatha. Did she feel like this too? She had been dealing for years with the knowledge that you will be gone someday. You always assured her that you still had time, but now that you were feeling some sadness at the thought of losing the twins, you weren’t so sure anymore. You really had to make sure your time with her would be worth it. 

You were still thinking about it when you heard an explosion and felt the twins freezing at your sides. When you looked up, you saw Vision flying away and a big red smoke coming your way from Wanda’s house. Your reaction was instinctive.

“Y/N!” you heard Billy screaming as you hugged them both, covering them with your body. 

You didn’t need any powers to feel their fear. The way Billy’s hand grabbed your shirt as a life saver and how Tommy hid his face on your chest, was enough. 

When the smoke hit you, you screamed. It felt as if all your body was burning.You couldn’t move, even when you wanted to run, so you just hugged the kids tighter. Suddenly, it all stopped.

You blinked and quickly looked at the twins, making sure they were fine. Something inside you, told you this was just the calm before the storm. 

“Run” you told them “Run to the park and hide, now!” You could feel they didn’t want to leave you, but they nodded and obeyed you anyway. You started running to your house, wanting to make sure Agatha was fine. The house was literally next to Wanda’s house, after all.

You barely made it to the front door when another wave of red hit you and you fell to your knees, screaming. This time it was so much worse. You could feel Wanda’s burning rage and desperation. She was trying to keep everything in control, but was quickly losing it because her husband wouldn’t obey her anymore and her grief was giant. 

This is an accident. She will stop soon. You tried to calm yourself, but the pain was too much for you to handle. 

Wanda went outside her house just to see you crying on the floor, red strings around you, like chains. She gasped and tried to help, but her magic didn’t respond. She wasn’t in control anymore.

“Y/N!” You heard Agatha’s voice from somewhere near you. 

She sounded desperate and angry. You have heard that tone just once before, and it didn’t end well for the men that had hurt you. You knew she was about to unleash hell, and the last thought you had before passing out, looking at Wanda, was Run. Run, Witch, run.

Survey #322

“you will hear it when your god cries  /  you will see it when the sun dies  /  upon the altars of change”

What is your favorite nickname that you’ve had? "Bee," from my old best friend. I don't want others calling me it, though. Where did you go on the best date you’ve been on? A big arcade. It was a super fun double-date. Have you ever gotten a professional massage? No, and I don't want one. It'd be so awkward. What’s your favorite milkshake flavor? Chocolate. What act would you be most likely to perform in a talent show? I got nothin'. If you had braces, do you wear your retainers still? I don't. If you had braces, have your teeth moved since you got them off? Yep, because of the whole "not wearing my retainer" thing. Whose was the first baby shower you remember attending, and for what baby? I'm unsure. Possibly my sister's for her first daughter. Do you know anyone personally who’s lost a child? Many people. When was the last time you did something that felt like rebellion? So every now and again, I get a massive craving for soda at night, so I grab one from the kitchen and can hear my sleeping mother rightfully nagging me about it, haha... What is one present you got for your last birthday? Ashley got me this really cool skull bank that says "tattoo fund" on it, aha. I love it. What is one thing that you took to show and tell as a kid? I have a clear memory of bringing a Snorlax plushie one day. Do you remember losing your first tooth? Not my first, no. Are you afraid to pop a balloon? Not really, but it's kinda easy to make me jump just a lil bit when one is popped. When was the last time you laughed when you shouldn’t have? I don't know. Which was better: the first The Lion King or the second? That is fucking HARD. I adore both, but I think the original is slightly better. Do any of your grandparents have a tattoo? I'm pretty sure none of them did. Do you believe that your pets feel love towards you? My cat, definitely. As for my snake, I'm aware that snakes' brains simply aren't developed enough for love, but she clearly trusts me. Are you proud of your body? Fuck no. I'm humiliated by it every waking moment. Watermelon or cherries? I don't like either, but if I had to pick, watermelon. Favourite brand of cookies? I don't really have a favorite brand. Have you ever stuck gum under a desk/chair? No, that shit grosses me out. When shopping at a grocery store, do you return your cart or just leave it? Return your goddamn cart. What is one thing you’d never want your parents to find out? Uhhhh. I guess places I've "done it." When you were little, did you like Dr. Suess books? I did. Do you like eating out at restaurants? Yeah; at least, before Covid. What was your least favorite year of your life so far? Fuck 2016 into the next millenium. Do you like fried bologna? I haven't had it in so long that I don't really remember the taste. I think I would. Have you spent money on a game online? Yeah, very briefly with WoW. Mom was nice enough to refresh my subscription after the breakup (Jason paid for it prior), but from then on, I was rich enough in-game to use monthly game tokens to "pay." Do you put a line through your "7"s? Yes. What about your "Z"s? Also yes. Do you like cold pizza? Yeah, yummy. Do you like broccoli and cheese? Yessss. Toaster or toaster oven? We've always used a toaster oven. What are you most known for? Being artsy, I guess. Do you have any reputations? What are they? *shrug* What was the last thing to leave you speechless? No clue. What is the curviest part of your body? Well, I'm overweight, so it's difficult to tell where I'm naturally curvy... but I guess my hips. Even when I was at a perfectly healthy weight though, I don't think I was exceptionally curvy anywhere. What is your opinion on sex change? You are entirely deserving to feel comfortable in your own body. If you’re still a virgin, how important is your virginity to you? I'm not, though I thought I was when we were together, when we were really just using a loophole. It was a denial thing BECAUSE my virginity was so important to me. If you have lost it already, do you regret it? No. Would you take a break after graduating from high school (like, postpone going to college for a year or so)? I didn't. What regret keeps coming back to haunt you daily? Things I said to Jason. If you could cure yourself of one allergy, what would it be? Pollen. Would you ever post a picture of yourself crying on social media? No. Have you ever held a newborn baby? Yeah, my most recent niece I actually held. I don't THINK I held Aubree or Ryder as newborns because I was so afraid of not doing it right and hurting them. Do you know anyone who has twins? Yeah. Are you following in the career path of any family members? No. What is your favorite country in Europe? Germany. How many times have your comments been top comments on YouTube? A few times. I rarely ever comment, but if I do, it's because I feel like I really have something worth saying. Would you ever wear a wig? I'm not opposed to it. Do you like the moon or sun more? The moon. Do you like turkey or ham more? Ham. Have you ever slapped someone’s butt? Yes. Do you think dimples are ugly? I think they're cute, actually. Have you ever deleted Facebook friends for a significant other? No. Have you ever spent the night in jail? No. Do you consider yourself a good kisser? I assume I am from experiences. Do you watch Pewdiepie? Not anymore, no. His current content doesn't interest me. The most recent thing I watched was his playthrough of The Last of Us 2, because I adore the first game and definitely wanted to see him play the sequel. I think he's pretty funny and have no personal issues against him, though then again I am so uninvolved in the fandom that I have no idea if he's done something stupid again. Do you like "Despacito?" Haha, my mind went to The Dark Den's bearded dragon before the song... I'm not a fan of it, no. Did you ever color your hair pink? No, but I absolutely want to dye it pastel pink one day. :( I even edited a picture of me "testing" different hair colors out, and pastel pink looked suuuuper pretty. Do you drink energy drinks? No, they're too strong for my taste. Do you have any subscribers on YouTube? I don't now how many I have, but I know it's below 100. Do you have a Steam account? Yeah. Have you ever played Five Nights at Freddy’s? No, but I enjoy the franchise. I'm not totally clear on all the lore, though. Do you like religion? Quite honestly, no. Do you swear in front of children? No. What is the next craft you are going to make? There's no telling. I don't really do crafts. What was your favorite Backstreet Boys song? Maybe "The Call." Favorite *N Sync song? I don't remember enough of them, at least not right now. Which of those two bands did you like best? The BSB, baby. Do you learn choreography easily? When I danced, I'd say I learned at a fairly average pace. What’s your favorite candy to receive on Halloween? Reeseeeeeee's. <3 Do you have a bobblehead? No. Have you ever had a lead role in a play? No. Have you ever been insulted or called names by a significant other? No. I wouldn't tolerate that shit. What’s your favorite movie battle scene? Oh man, idk. Maybe something from Troy, though I honestly barely even remember the movie by now, haha. Have you ever been to a same-sex wedding? No, actually. Who takes care of your pet(s) when you’re out of town? Hypothetically, one of my sisters would come to feed and water Roman and clean his box. I'm certain I couldn't talk either into spraying Venus' cage, though... What was the last thing you wrote down on paper? Some group work during therapy. Did you have a Walkman when you were a kid? No. What’s your favorite recipe you’ve come up with? Oh dear, I don't make those. Do you like celery? Yuck, no. By what age could you swallow pills? I dunno. A normal age. Do you like to drink alot of water? I need to drink more. :/ I've gotten better, though. For years, I literally never drank water. How I even survived, idk. How many times have you gone fishing? Countless times. Ever been to a roller-skating rink? Yeah. I loved having bday parties there as a lil'un. What do you refer to your mother as? (Mom, momma, mommy) Mom, Ma, and Mama. Have you ever swam in the ocean? Yeah, multiple times. What is the last movie that made you cry? I think the remake of The Lion King. What would you like to swim in other than water? Nothing? If you could uninvent one thing what would you chose? Damn, just one? Maybe cigarettes? Have you ever read someone's diary? Absolutely not. I respect people's privacy. Have you ever played in a waterfall? No, but that'd be dope. Who has inspired you the most in your life? Probably Mark. Is there a place where everyone who lives near you tends to hang out? Idk. Teens sure do love to hang out at Sonic, though, reving their stupid fucking trucks. Does your alarm clock wake you with music, or with an annoying buzz sound? Music. Did you make it all the way through the Oregon Trail game? Yes; I was obsessed with those as a kid. Lions and tigers and bears, oh my! Which one are you more scared of? I feel like being alone with a tiger would scare me most. Though let's be real, I'd probably try to pet it. Have you ever changed your favorite color? From what to what? It was originally red, but then became pink when I actually understood it was its own color. Then it was maroon forever, and now it's back to pink. On a scale of 1-10, how competitive are you? Eh, 4-6? It depends on the situation, I guess. At what age did your have your most memorable birthday? My 21st, because I was in the psych hospital for it. Yes or no: Guys in skinny jeans? Yeah, man. Yes or no: Girls with dreads? Some people can pull it off. Have you ever attended a themed b-day party? What was the theme? Oh yeah, plenty. Do you have any Eminem on your iPod/MP3 player? I do. Has anybody ever given you a promise ring? No. What do you think about putting ‘spinners’ on cars? So long as they're not too distracting, I don't care. Do what you want with your car - again, so long as it is not disruptive. What celebrity do you wish would have a big comeback? I wish poor Britney Spears could catch a goddamn break and be happy again. She's a legend that doesn't deserve to feel like a puppet. Were you outdoors or indoors more as a kid? I'd say there was a pretty even split. Do you or have you ever owned a horse? No, but I LOVE horses. Have you ever had a relationship that began via text? (weird, I know, but it happens…) Most of my relationships started through a text message. Did you believe in unicorns as a small child? I don’t think so. Would you ever date a guy with longer hair than yourself? Yeah; I have short hair anyway, and I also like long hair on guys. Do you watch the show Wizards of Waverly Place? I used to love that show. Have you ever been to the rainforest? No; humidity aside though, that would be so amazing. Bats are not spooky or are they? I think they're precious. Do you like the song "Womanizer?" I sure do, actually. Do you like ice cream cake? Not really, but I'll eat it. Do you know how to change a tire? Nope. What kind of headphones do you have? Just cheap earplugs. Do you experiment a lot with new looks on yourself? No. What were some fun experiments you did in science class as a kid? Dissecting a frog was my favorite, and doing the same with an owl pellet was also very cool. What was the last strong emotion you felt? Guilt. I lied to get out of group therapy early because I was just NOT feeling it whatsoever that day, and I hate lying. Do you use dry shampoo between washes? No. Have you ever lived with someone you didn’t get along with? No. What types of animals have you had as pets? Jeez, what haven't we had... We've had cats, dogs, snakes, rats, gerbils, a rabbit, hamsters, lizards, fish, guinea pigs... Hell, I'm probably forgetting one or two. Can you name three good things about your most recent ex? She's so creative, a real advocate for proper reptile education and appreciation, and very kind. Name three bands/artists that you hate. Uhhh The Talking Heads, Bob Dylan, and The Police. What’s the best memory you have of your father? Playing softball with him in the front yard, and when he taught me to ride a bike. Should tattoos be meaningful? You get a tattoo for whatever reason you damn well want. I don't plan on all of mine to be meaningful. Some stuff I just want because I think it's cool. Are you afraid of the dark? No. Have you ever been through a trap door? No. What's the most recent good news you’ve heard? Hm. Who was the last person in your family to have a baby? My older sister. When’s the last time you used the microwave? Last night. What’s the worst thing in your life right now? Financial struggles. Have you ever owned a tire swing? No. Does anyone you know own a bird that can talk? No. Have you ever been someplace tropical? Yeah, Florida. Have Jehovah'ss witnessess ever called to your door? Yep. when was the last time you went to mass/church? I have no idea. It's been many years. Have you ever experienced sleep paralysis? Thank heavens no.

I hate forward text messages, so you should already know that I will hate forward picture mail also. It seriously amazes me how stupid some people are. My new year’s was pretty much ruined because of someone who was being a complete asshole. (a whole country being assholes about masks) I really don’t like when people I’m close with have birthdays close together or near holidays..it gives me no chance to try and save money. For once, I actually don’t like anyone right now. I’m not really good for relationships, and I don’t really want one at all right now. When I’m listening to music I don’t always sing along with it out loud. I seriously could use a break from everything around me. Some qualities that I know I have, when I see it in someone I’m around it will completely piss me off. There is someone i really want to see right now.

I’ve recently had a conversation with someone who tends to talk a lot. ^ That or I just don’t talk a lot. I will ignore someone once they get me upset. I blush really easily. The sound of someone popping a balloon bothers me. I swear I will go deaf before my time is up. I listen to my iPod when I’m in the shower always. Sometimes when I start thinking back to situations of my past the emotions I felt then will come flooding back to me. I get along with more people on my mom’s side of the family rather than my dad. I seriously don’t think Megan Fox is that pretty or that talented…sorry. I have changed into a few different outfits before making up what I actually wanna wear for that day. I own some really short shorts. I’ve been too shy to tell a guy I liked him or even tried going for him more than one time. I was outshined by one of my sisters a lot growing up. In one relationship I was in we were the definition of opposites attracting. I find it funny that people will turn to if something is ‘facebook official’ for clarification on things like relationships. I don’t get why parents who have twins insist on having their names sound similar or start with the same letter. I think southern accents are too cute. I’m not, and never will be, that person who writes everything on a calendar or makes lists for everything. A lot of people come to me, because they know I’ll help and that I’m not gonna say shit. It bugs me a lot when people always have to make something about them. Always. Learn how to take a fucking hint, please. Recently I’ve been running into a lot of people from school, and it’s really weird. My mom uses coupons when she does grocery shopping, all the time. I don’t see the need to always be talking in a conversation, I don’t mind silence. I don’t care for the stores at all, but i think hollister and abercrombie is really hot on a guy. I will laugh at any guy who wears skinny jeans, please leave that for girls. I’m pretty sure I wouldn’t get along with my siblings if they weren’t in my family. It takes a lot for me to get out of a bad mood once I’m in one. ^ But when it comes to me being happy it takes little to nothing to ruin that for me. Don’t sit there and try to add your opinion to something when you’ve never tried to know all about it. People love to mess with me because apparently my reaction to things is amusing. I’d rather drink and have a good buzz feelin’ good, then be completely wasted making a complete ass of myself. More than one person in my family is a legit alcoholic. I joke around a lot, and for some reason there’s a lot of people who take it too serious and get their feelings hurt. I myself can never tell when someone is being serious or whether they’re joking. Most of the time when i say lol or just haha i’m not really laughing, when i am i’ll say lmfao or lmao. I don’t understand why people text with complete grammar and don’t short hand anything. I’m really good at writing. ^ A lot of people here know that about me, and assume I’ll get a career with it. I’m scared to death about losing my best friend. If you hurt my feelings, as bad as it is, I will not give a fuck about how bad I hurt yours in return. I have a niece, who means the world to me. I’ve become a lot closer to some people in my life. For some reason my parents torture me with having some extremely embarrassing pictures of me when i was a kid. I’m really oblivious to things. I’ve told a story or a joke, and i myself ended up being the only person cracking up about it. I’m terrified of growing old and losing my memory…I don’t wanna forget anything. ^ I’m also really scared of everyone who matters passing away and me ending up completely alone. I’m really tired of being screwed over by people. I have a reputation to people around here, but it isn’t me at all. ^ But I don’t really care about that, the ones that mean something know the truth. Looks can only get you so far, for me personality means a whole lot more. Shallow people really bother me a lot. Trust me when I say to leave me the fuck alone, cause you won’t like what I have to say to you. I’ve been told by a lot of people that I’m nothing like my friends. I don’t really open up to a lot of people, but my best friend knows more than anyone else in the world about me. There’s someone that I really want to just go off on. I don’t know how to help someone who cries around me, it makes me feel like shit too. I’m constantly messing up my sleeping schedule. I don’t count middle school dating as real relationships, i almost don’t count 9th or 10th grade ones either. ^That being cause in my opinion you don’t really know yourself, and you’re not that mature..well most people. A lot of people who pass judgment on me are usually always wrong. ^ But I’m not gonna waste my time to try and convince you otherwise. Nothing pisses me off worse than when someone is wasting my time.

Getting to Know...

Ruby Ryan.

You Could Move In, the debut EP from New Brunswick, NJ singer-songwriter Ruby Ryan, opens with a big beat. Before long, the rhythm track is joined by a melancholy – but gritty – electric guitar riff. In a few quick strokes, a mood is established: longing, urgent, expectant, a little lovelorn, more than a little pugnacious, forward-looking. It's stark, and unadorned, and emotionally bare; once you start listening, it's hard to stop. A full half-minute elapses before Ryan starts singing, but she makes an indelible impression when she does. Ryan has a voice with enough tensile strength to carry sadness and determination simultaneously. She doesn't have to try to be powerful; she just is.

The best place to start with Ruby Ryan might be 'Phosphenes,' an exercise in straight-ahead, doomed romantic storytelling. Everything about the track feels absolutely real: the plaintive lyrics, the missed connections with the object of the narrator's desire, the stinging six-string, and the catch in the singer's voice as she expresses her hope and her frustration. Anybody who has ever harbored unrequited affection – or who has just found themselves caught in a difficult and ambiguous relationship – will surely relate.

Ruby Ryan also understands the beauty and desolation of the suburbs. Her clip for 'Phosphenes' is suffused with the distinctive feeling of suburbia in the autumn: leaves are falling, flowers are withering on their stems, a crisp breeze is blowing, and the sands are running out. Ryan and her directorial partner Alex Tichy follow the romantic drama of a young couple whose emotions are impossible to disguise – and that's because they're both wearing enormous heads made of plaster and paint. The contrast between the quotidian suburban surroundings and the fantastic characters who inhabit these streets creates much of the clip's tension, and it's also a sly commentary. When you're young and in love, you really do feel larger than life – and utterly exposed, too.

Watch the video for 'Phosphenes' below and also read our Q&A with Ruby all about You Could Move In, her influences, creative process and more.

Hi Ruby! How have you been? What are you doing to stay sane during this pandemic?

"I am okay. I work at a grocery store full time, so I’m not even sane, I’m just getting through the pandemic. I spend time hanging out with and missing the people I love. I look at and water my plants, and listen to records, and do a lot of cooking and eating. But mostly I’m working, or sending an email."

How did you get into music? Who did you grow up being influenced by?

"My mom will tell you I’ve been making up songs and singing to myself since I was such a small child. I don’t know how she was never driven cray by me, I was always singing just making stuff up, singing my thoughts basically. She’s very musical and she and my grandmother have surrounded me with music my whole life. Whether it was putting me in piano lessons, or seeing my grandmother sing, I was always in a position to feel inspired musically, by them.

"I played in band through all of school, 5th grade through senior year. I played the bassoon, which looking back, was the best thing ever. I loved it. But I didn’t keep it up in college because I was scared of going to school to perform music with an ensemble. I thought the expectations would be really high, and feared I couldn’t learn quickly enough or be good enough to keep up. Or that I might let people down.

"Right after my freshman year of college is when I decided to try writing and playing songs with a guitar. I’d had one for a few years but then (even now, honestly) didn’t know much besides open chords and how to play some Jeff Buckley songs I learned on Youtube. That first year of college though it felt like I was shriveling up, I had no outlet for this musical creativity and it was really getting to me. I had met this friend Phil, and he and I decided to start writing music and later form a band (Old Joy) together. We continued on with that for a couple years, and I left that project last fall.

"I think my mom played only good music when I was growing up. We listened to the radio and CD’s in the car, and I can’t remember specifically which artists but I’m sure she could. I consider the influences I grew up listening to to be the people I listened to and felt really intensely when I was discovering that I wanted to write music.

"It’s a lot of stuff I latch onto lyrically, and sonically. I’m like “how’d they make me feel like that using just a little tap? or strum? or word?” and then I want to learn more or crack open how to make people feel intensely like I do. People like the Carpenters, Bon Iver, The Japanese House, Phoebe Bridgers and Jeff Buckley. Pretty much if an artist could make me wonder “how did they find words for a feeling, so specifically, and do it so elegantly before I knew what to call it?” they’re an influence of mine. I’ve cried and learned how to come home to myself while listening to each of those artists."

You've just released your debut EP You Could Move In. What's the record about and what does it mean to you?

"The record is about dealing with losing people and trying to figure out where I belong. My life feels like a revolving door of people who mean the world to me, just entering and exiting, entering and exiting. This record is written from a place in me that uses my time spent in constant motion as time to process or unravel my feelings. I kind of use driving as a coping mechanism. I’ve written most of these songs while in a car. I’ll either be writing a lyric on the back of a receipt at a stop light or making an audio recording of a blip of sound or a word I don’t want to forget, but they’re almost always while I’m driving. I’m just thinking a lot when I’m driving, trying to put words to what the heck is going on.

"This thing means everything to me, somehow. It feels so vulnerable for it to be out. It’s my first solo release, too. So I can’t hide, there’s no way these words are someone else’s. Everyone knows it’s me, and this is what I’m feeling or going through or went through. It’s a lot. I wrote these songs as a way to process and get through some really tricky stuff. Having these songs out feels like I’m willingly showing everyone home videotapes of my processing my own pain and my own struggles."

Take us through your songwriting/creative process.

"Playing with an instrument in an ensemble, a piece that’s been written and should be played with so much respect for the music and the composer, is a lot of pressure. I would get so anxious. It always meant a lot to me, like it was a high honor to know how to play it, and have the opportunity to be a part of giving life to someone else music. But it was a lot of anxiety, trying to make sure it was right all the time. And it never was, like I’d mess up and be down on myself, which I think is normal. Deciding to write music and play it by/for myself was a life changing decision. I didn’t even know it was possible to feel good like this. I can make something up, (which usually I have to because I don’t know how to play the guitar) and it can sound good. I can remember it and be good at playing it because I made it up, and I don’t have to follow anyone else standards or rules, or impress anyone, it’s just me. Of course I want to do it well and hold myself to a certain standard when I’m playing. I’m really hard on myself. But I don’t have to cry if I mess up a note or sing a wrong word, it can just be funny because it’s only me.

"My process is, I’ll be driving or falling asleep at night and come up with a line or lyric, and keep a running note or journal of them all. Literally I have to inspire myself to life my head up off the pillow and pick up the phone and write it down. I can’t tell you how many lyrics I’ve had ideas for and thought to myself “oh that’s so good, oh thats so catchy, you’ll never forget it” and then I don’t write it down, and now I’ve completely forgotten them. But I keep a running note until it’s massive. Like as long as a jump rope, and then i’ll shuffle them around and make poems, or find ways they connect and then glue them together.

"Sometimes when a melody comes to me (rare) I play the kazoo into a voice recording to remember how it goes. That can become a baseline, a guitar riff or a vocal melody, but thats the only way i can figure out instrumental’s for songs. Then I pick up a guitar or most likely go to a piano, and have to figure out what the notes are by ear, then the key and the chord progression. I don’t know chords or what notes are what on the guitar, so usually it’s just trial and error until I find on the strings or keys what I hear. I have to work backwards and learn how to play what I hear in my brain. It’s a very long and difficult process, and often discouraging. It feels so good though then its complete and written, like this big confused thing I can’t put words to, is finally allowed to exist outside my head and have its own space."

Finally, what's next for you?

"I have no idea. I work at a grocery store, I graduated undergrad straight into a global pandemic, there is no map in my hand, there’s not even a direction I’m walking in. I just hope people like my music. I’m going to keep doing this. It feels really good to make music and share it, I’d follow this feeling anywhere. Especially since I’m not on my way anywhere specific at the moment."

You Could Move In is out now.

day ??? of quarantine

today is easter sunday, april 12th. 

we’ve been quarantined for 26 days. our restaurant’s dining room’s have been closed for 25 days. tensions are high, emotions are flowing, people are feeling all the feels. everyone except me, that is...

i have felt nothing this entire month. i haven’t cried once. i haven’t been all that angry. sure, i’ve been tired and i haven’t slept well and i’ve been bored and frustrated that there isn’t more to do. i was disappointed when our foster care class was canceled. but honestly, i haven’t felt much emotion at all. my anxiety hasn’t skyrocketed. i don’t feel scared. i am not paranoid of the virus or of getting sick (i’ve never been a germaphone anyway so i don’t feel panicky in the way that other people do). i told clif the other day, i keep waiting to cry or to just lose it on someone. i know those emotions are there somewhere under the surface...surely? i don’t know what’s going on. i guess because i feel anxiety all the time in normal life and i always feel like i’m waiting for something bad to happen or for “the other shoe to drop” so to say -- and this is the bad thing, at least for now. so it’s here and maybe it’s not so bad after all for me at least (that feels like a horrible thing to say because it is bad for so many people and so many have lost their lives or their loved ones and in cities like nyc it’s horrendous beyond belief) i’m also a pretty adaptable person so maybe it’s more that this feels like something i can adapt to for the time being and so my role in this is to be that person that keeps moving... and when it’s all over perhaps i’ll crash and burn?

as for other, non-mental-health-related things, since i last posted things changed in our world even more. everything is different as we know it. all non-essential businesses are closed (gyms, spas, clothing stores, etc) and restaurants can still only do carry-out and curbside. our team has continued to adapt well, i am proud of how we’ve handled things. we cut our hours from 7am to 6pm, and then about two weeks ago we cut them even further back to 3pm. it just didn’t make sense to stay open and run the labor clock out when we were so slow. for the most part our customers have been supportive and understanding. we’ve had the occasional angry customer that said “well google says you’re open until 8pm” and it’s like, ‘well sure but this is also a pandemic and everyone is closing early so maybe stop trusting google so much and just expect that things might be different.’ 

church has been online for us since i last posted. we’ve been doing Redeemer west side live streams, which honestly has been encouraging for my soul to sing old hymns with Tom Jennings and hear our friend Kate from our old community group lead the prayers of the people and to see David Bisgrove’s face each week and have him lead us in the Lord’s Prayer. there’s so much we miss about Redeemer so this is both a source of comfort to us but also creating a longing and an ache that will have consequences for us when this is all over...

we’ve seen very few friends in person but we’ve facetimed with so many that we wouldn’t have ordinarily. brendon & theresa, my college girls, jen & matt a lot, my mom and dad almost everyday. it’s funny but i think i miss my mom more than anything, this is the longest i’ve not seen her since we moved back to this area after nyc. the other night we played a game online with Boyd and Sarah while on Zoom with them. it was lots of fun. Zoom is a thing now... it’s not that important. 

of course our president has handled this poorly. he is the absolute worst person you want leading your country in a time like this. he isn’t a leader at all, he’s a petty child who wants all the credit for things he should’ve done anyway. instead of leading, he takes to twitter or tv every chance he can get to say “look what i did! look what i did!” Dr. Fauci, head of infectious diseases for the CDC is leading our country through this. Gov. Andrew Cuomo of NYC has also had a profound impact not just on his state but on our country through his leadership. the situation in the city is so much worse and scarier and more real than it is here. maybe my feelings would be different (emotion-wise) if we still lived in nyc. obviously because of the denseness, the death count is so much higher there. they are building pop-up tent hospitals in central park, and facing real challenges of how to bury all the bodies of those who have passed away from the virus. KFed is a nurse at Mt. Sinai and it’s crazy seeing her photos of her in her protective gear. Brendon told us that no one is taking the subways in the city. he needed some things from his office so he walked from their apartment on 158th to his work in the 20′s. it took him all day. but he didn’t want to risk any contamination and Theresa is now high-risk because she’s pregnant (what the what?!?!?! omg so exciting! praise the Lord!) 

people are wearing masks everywhere. there are lines outside of grocery stores because they can only have a certain amount of people in the building at one time. our unemployment count in our country is higher than it’s ever been, higher than during the great depression. the economic fall-out from this will last for years to come. the senate did finally pass a 2T stimulus package called the CARES act. it has some provisions for small businesses to get money that could be forgivable if used on certain things. we applied and got accepted for both restaurants -- we will get money to spend mostly on payroll and some other overhead expenses in 8 weeks once the money is funded. they are also sending a check to every american who made under $130K last year -- so we’re supposedly getting a check sometime for $2400 ($1200 per person and $500 per kid for those families who qualify). hopefully we’ll get some of our staff back to work and extended our hours back to 6, since we won’t have to be as worried about our labor costs being high. 

i guess that’s about all i can think to update for now. as for what clif and i have been up to, well... we’ve taken a “cocktail walk” almost everyday. around 4pm we’ve made cocktails and taken them with us as we walk Lenny around the park and say hello to those of our neighbors who are outside, too. the weather has been great so we’ve been very lucky in that regard. we’ve done some yard work and clif has been doing some drawing and lots of bread baking. we’re trying to eat at home 5 nights/week and eat out the other 2. to spread the local love around, we’ve enjoyed Progress burgers, Farmer’s Gastropub, Everyday Thai, Craft Sushi and I think tonight we’ll get either Bambino’s or Los Cabos. i haven’t been doing too much because i’m not a “hobby” person so I don’t do well with stuff like this where you have to stay inside and pass the time. i’ve been reading a lot, that’s about it. here are some photos from the past few weeks: 

feeding healthcare workers in partnership with local organizations has been a highlight for us! this is Cox Hospital staff here. 

we’ve been selling both bread and flour like crazy. there has been a flour shortage in grocery stores so we’ve sold probably more flour in the last 3 weeks than in the 20 year history of neighbor’s mill. 

hot cross buns for easter -- didn’t do hardly what we would’ve normally for a holiday weekend baking-wise but we still had to do these gorgeous buns and some festive cookies and cupcakes. 

we were on the front page of the Newsleader as a “small business adapting during the time of COVID” -- we had some blowback from the photo of our bakers shaping dough without gloves on, but all ended well as we took the time to educate and had positive responses from most of our customers 

our bread at Price Cutter -- i feel like the poor stock workers were like “screw up, it’s gonna be gone in three hours anyway, let’s just leave it on the dolly” 

boredom leads clif to many funny and creative things, though not always useful -- here he made a concrete cup mold 

my dad on KY3 for a story about local support of restaurants in Harrison 

a quarantine meal when food was low -- let’s see what’s in the fridge! 

said game we played with Boyd and Sarah where we had to draw different prompts -- i am a terrible drawer! 

afternoon rose and popcorn while Lenny plays and wanders -- we began sitting on the front porch just so we could see anyone walking by on the street and have the chance to chat and be social from a distance 

not much has changed with the animals 

chalk art outside Cox South main entrance 

lol...”i thought you said CLAMdemic” card from Donita 

sign we purchased to put in front of our restaurant -- strange times 

COVID-19 19: Laura Cozijnsen

“Laura you are being irrational you wanted masks but you got disposable gloves!”

To start off the COVID-19 19 interview series, I invited Laura Cozijnsen for a discussion at her office in Tsim Sha Tsui on a Thursday morning. Laura is the founder of Lighthouse Consultancy,   a communications consultancy delivering diverse public relation campaigns and events with high profile clients such as Tai Kwun, HKUST and HKIA. Alongside Laura’s entrepreneurial success at Lighthouse, she is an award-winning MC and public speaker hosting events such as the 2010 Expo in Shanghai. With Laura’s longstanding involvement and commitment for Hong Kong’s communications industry, this interview hopefully reveals a glimpse into the potential changes and innovations Lighthouse Consultancy and the larger creative industries will have to go through in order to adapt with COVID-19. And as much as it is important to consider the new corporate strategies set in motion, I also wanted to know how Laura was personally coping with the pandemic whether it be with how she greets her dog when she comes back from work or on the political nature of the face mask. Everyone in Hong Kong has their own memories of SARS and now COVID-19, and this is Laura Cozijnsen’s:

T: Reflecting on the past, what was your understanding and experience of SARS in 2003?

L: 2003, I was working for a media company starting in Hong Kong.  I remember vividly that it was very scary. The times were scary. Scary in a sense, there is almost like this fog of fear around hong kong. I think it was scarier then now. I remember vividly because my role back then was a regional role. I had to travel to Singapore, Malaysia and Indonesia. We had a few trips planned before SARS. There was this Singaporean company who called us and said “please don’t come to Singapore, you are from the SARS zone”. And I felt so bad, we always felt so welcomed to have meetings and then we could dine out. And then all of a sudden all we got was “you’re from the SARS zone”. It was also a time when I felt…we felt collectively sad. And the loss of medical professionals - the doctors, the nurses and the caregivers all live in our memories. And of course Amoy Gardens and the area around it, no one wanted to be near the buildings. That was how scary it was.

T: I wrote an essay before this all happened - an essay focusing on illness narratives. I wrote about how prevention was also part of an illness really, because it was a social reaction. So I wrote about the prevention methods in the United Kingdom versus Hong Kong. It reminded me that one time, I told my mom that I was going to a birthday party buffet in the Metropole Hotel in Mong Kok. I didn’t know at the time, because they changed their names and everything. So my mom was like “What’s wrong with you?”.

L: I think it was different from now. SARS was more a Hong Kong/China thing. At the beginning of coronavirus, it felt very much the same. There was China and there was Hong Kong. No one knew that it would blow up in the rest of the world. And now it felt like it was the whole world going through this. And from a financial perspective, it’s worse now. Because SARS was just here, and now the rest of the world. I think, is this nature’s way of telling us like “wake up”. No one can escape.

I had a friend in the UK that caught coronavirus. She is from Hong Kong, she works in London. Her mom visited her in January and her mom came back early March, after staying with her for two months. And the tests at the airports, she was confirmed as a case. And then my friend started feeling coughs and heavy breathing, and it was only then that she realised that she might have coronavirus. She was not tested, because they said we do not have enough test. So the numbers…what does a number mean?

T: You touched on it briefly, but how has it changed in 2020? And especially in the earlier months, when it felt so much more like an “asian problem”. What was your perspective in Hong Kong?

L: I thought it would be like SARS. Okay, as long as we continue doing the precautions we will be okay. But then there was also this scare of the lack of masks. Everybody was trying to get a mask. You know the internet meme of “two boxes please”? When someone says, I have a source and then you respond with “two boxes please”. That has become a joke amongst friends but that was the most scary. Because we had no idea we would need so many masks. And it was Chinese New Year. The Wuhan lockdown was 25th of January. And that really sent a message. I should send you my Facebook Live, I did a facebook live on the survey results. It was amazing, the day Hong Kong people started wearing masks was before the Wuhan lockdown. So why would we know, how come we can predict that we need to wear masks? It was before the first confirmed case in Hong Kong. So there was this collective memory of this type of illness, and the knee-jerk reaction of us needing to do this.

This was so funny, one day like many others I was trying to get a box of mask for myself and my mother who does not live with me. I went all over the neighbourhood trying to get masks. We ended up at a grocery store, and the saleslady said “We ran out of masks, why don’t you get some gloves?”. I think the irrationality got the better of me, I bought two boxes of gloves. So it’s still sitting in my kitchen, unused. That was the moment where I realised “Laura you are being irrational you wanted masks but you got disposable gloves!”. I think it was also realising that the death rate in Hong Kong was much less than SARS in Hong Kong was reassuring. But yes, that was the early days.

T: Especially the HKU Prevention of Diseases department, they continued to speak out even after Carrie Lam was asking citizens to not wear a mask. And the team at HKU, they were like “please wear a mask!”.

L: There are so many mixed messages! I think a lot of them come out and say “don’t wear a mask because there is a shortage”. If you don’t have enough stock, you should be clear about it. We have stock for how many days, what’s the best alternatives. You cannot say you do not have to wear one, it is irresponsible. When you look at the statistics, how the growth was being contained in certain cities you realise mask wearing helps. When you look at the President of the United States, he does not even wear a mask, he does not wear a mask in the hospital.

Which brings to the question - how do we select our leaders, how are our leaders being selected and why are they our leaders?

When I was writing my thesis, inevitably people would start talking about the Anti-Mask Law, last year in Hong Kong for the protests. But I think as researchers in that role, we report what is being brought up. And its totally okay, with people there has to be politics.

I think we should provide all medical and sanitation staffs a bonus and a longer holiday after this. Because they work their asses off. I’ve got close friends working in public hospitals that were so stressed, understandably stressed. You also see the beauty of someone going into the Dirty Team with SARS experience, bringing in new nurses and doctors who do not have SARS experience. Hopefully that would educate them and help them understand what it is like. There is a good thing going on as well, those who have experienced it say, “I need to do this because I want the second and third generation of caretakers to know what it's like.”.

T: Going on more of a business perspective, since industries have been pushed into a digital realm during COVID-19, how has that changed working in event management?

L: I think there are a few layers, when you see something that is such a change that is so abrupt. I would think the first thing to do is internal stabilising within the company. In early Feb, we talked about how COVID-19 would affect us as an industry and what we have to brace ourselves for. Every month we have a “situation room meeting”. We basically talk about how business is, what it is going to be like. So internal is phase one. The second is facing external but not in terms of switching gears but understanding what our clients are facing. Because we are all human. They might be afraid of losing their job or bottom line. So really understanding their concerns is what is important. And the thought then would be to switch gears or to think about new things. It would hopefully in the next year that hybrid events could be an option. Once we have this, we can go back and have internal education and the talk yesterday for clients we can reassure them and tell them that we have done this before.

Everything begins with the team, then to understand what the market and client wants and then do it instead of jumping right in. Because without an internal support or understanding you can never do it well. Of course during this time period, all companies are under a lot of stress. It is a time to tell people’s virtues and real characters.

T: Do you think it will change the future of physical events, do you think people will be less willing to participate since you do specific location based events?

L: I think there is going to be a push and pull. There will be a switch in terms of the proportions for a while. And if digital picks up and serves the purpose then we will see events in a different light. Digital events will become less of a ‘nice to have’ and more of a main thing. The benefits have not been capitalised before. I do think that physical events are important because we are human beings, we crave social interactions and seeing each other. But it will be very different.

T: Thinking about your colleagues at work, since they are younger do you think their understanding of SARS is vastly different to yours?

L: I don’t think a lot of them remember, I think at least you have to be 30 years old to have good memory of SARS because it was 17 years ago. To pick up a new thing it does not necessarily have to be for young people, you might see older generations willing to pick up new things. It does not mean that young people will be more accepting to change. So I think the future of education is about growing a generation of agility, flexibility and change. Instead of having to tell students to take ten subjects and pass all of them.

T: How have you and your personal circle (family and friends) been coping with COVID-19?

L: It’s interesting, I get to see more friends now than before. We will call each other more. Before, I had a busier schedule. I do not think that without COVID-19, I would have met so many friends if that can be considered a plus. Family - my mother has been through SARS, she is okay. She has more supplies than she needs, but her only thing is that she is a big church person. So I was teaching her how to use Facebook to watch mass.

T: My grandma does that too! She tells me, “Yes we can go to mass together online!”.

L: I think that has changed, my mom is 78 and she can still learn which is pretty amazing. I also think the world has slowed down. And for us to realise when there is less work, what is important. It is the friends and family that we have. I have friends who paid horrendous amounts of money just to get their kids to get back on the soonest flight. I asked them, “Can you wait for a week? It would be maybe 1/10th of the price.”. And they responded with, “No it must be today.”.

T: This question is more of a precursor to developing one of my other projects, something I want to extend beyond this interview series: In terms of understanding the political nature of the mask, what is your opinion on Hong Kong’s culture of donning masks?

L: I think mask wearing in Hong Kong is a constructed social defence, because that is something we can do. It is almost like psychologically I can do something about it. SARS has redefined for us what a mask is. Because it used to be if you were sick or for a medical staff. But now after SARS, if it is the flu season, you see a lot more people wearing masks. Especially now, according to my research, it is 96% of Hong Kong people wear a mask. Maybe every now and then before the pandemic, someone wearing a mask would be not judged that much. So in fact, the social judgement can change. And not to mention last year, the anti-mask law, and now people see differently. It is something that we feel i can control - both on a hygiene level and on a choice level. So I will do it.

T: How do you feel about the anti-mask law? How did others go about it? Because when I first heard of that law I wondered what people who were sick would go about their day. Even if you were stopped by authorities how can you really prove that you are sick?

L: Personally I was quite resistant to the anti-mask law because I think it is a personal choice. Of course there is a discussion with those who would be held responsible in the eyes of the law with those participating in unauthorised rallies but I still think this is a human right. I think we should want to choose whether we want to wear a mask or not. Of course if a police officer needs to check my HKID for whatever reason, they can request me to temporarily take off my mask. But you cannot say you cannot wear a mask. It’s like if its for religious purposes, oh you cannot wear a veil. It just does not make sense. Or by telling people that you cannot wear a mask it makes people want to wear a mask, its a kind of reverse psychology.

T: I would like to talk about the situation in Mainland China. There are videos on the Internet of people coughing on lift buttons. Now, I do not know if these videos are one hundred percent real or staged. But even the very act of filming it or recording it from a security camera, what does that mean for the health and safety for people living their day to day lives?

L: I feel the most sorry for the people in Wuhan. I think they would require a lot of support after this because it is like where the nuclear bomb hit, right? You didn’t know it was happening, it happened, you didn’t know how to react, you didn’t know who to trust, and you’re just trying to fight for your life. And it is so sad to see videos of people living there and reporters trying to cover footage, its such a quiet city. It is a city that needs a lot of love. And politics is one thing but we always need to remember we are all people, whatever political affiliations we have we are human beings. And imagine that feeling in Wuhan, is like the feeling of being in SARS in Hong Kong. Like, “Fuck, what’s going on? What’s going to happen next?”. I still remember during SARS when I go home, I’d take off all my clothes and then run straight to the bathroom and take a shower before I’d play with my dog. And my dog would be looking at me like (makes confused face). Even now, its not as serious. I would go home, wash my hands and then take off my mask and change into home clothes and then I’ll play with my dog. But she still looks at me confused. And I’m sure people with kids as well. Just imagine doctors and nurses with kids, they (kids) don’t understand. If this is happening to us, we aren’t even in the epicentre. Imagine those in the epicentre.

T: I remember when they did the lockdown in Wuhan, initially they said it was two weeks. But when I saw the lorries barricading the city. I thought to myself, “This is not for two weeks. This is something very serious.”

L: I think for us in communication there is a lot to learn. How should we communicate? What should we communicate? And I think the Taiwan government this time has done a good job. There is so much to learn from them, how they communicated, what to say and what not to say. It is not a parental way of ruling, it is more like how can we work together. I think it is a lot to learn in terms of communications and media.

Finally Found My OTP

“Could you do a fosters imagine where mariana catches the reader and jesus kissing and she runs around the house screaming about how her otp is finally together?”

I’m sorry this took me so long to write! I hope you enjoy this imagine! I more focused on Jesus and the readers relationship/ friendship.

Please let me know what you think!

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Finally found my OTP

Jesus’ POV

It was an unusually quiet Saturday at the Adams-Foster house. For the simple fact, most everyone was out of the house. Mom was at the station trying to pick up a few extra hours to get some more money. Mama was at the grocery store since the fridge was about bare. And having five teenagers to feed, she had to make sure to stock up on grocery and figure out something for dinner. Brandon was hanging out with his girlfriend Grace at her place. Jude was hanging out with either Taylor or Noah. Callie was of course with her boyfriend Aaron, while Mariana was at roller derby practice. That left only one family member left alone in the house to enjoy the peace and quite me…Jesus. Believe me when I tell you that I was enjoying the alone time and having the house all to myself. This rare occurrence didn’t often happen, so I was making the most of it. Especially with my twin sister and my older sister out of the house. But more so, my twin sister. I have to make a confession I wasn’t completely alone. I was with our neighbor and my best friend since we moved into this house forever ago Y/N.

Y/N and I were laying on my bed watching a movie together since there wasn’t anything else I could do since my TBI. Y/N curled up in my arms with her head on my chest. To anyone outside of my family, this would look like we were in a relationship, but we weren’t we were best friends.

When my TBI happened, Y/N was there the second she found out about it. And she refused to leave my side in the hospital room from what Mom, Mama, and everyone else told me. Mom and Mama had to make her leave and get some rest and go clean up and get something to eat. Also, Emma wasn’t too thrilled that Y/N was always by my side day and night from what Mariana later told me. Y/N spent every waking moment that she could possibly spend with me when I came home, we were inseparable.

On the one hand me spending time so much time with Y/N could be. The reason why Emma and I broke up and I didn’t care or have a problem with it. You see, I loved Y/N more than a best friend. I had romantic feelings for her, but I was too chicken to say anything and mess up our friendship. Because not having Y/N in my life at all would be too much and I couldn’t live with that!

I looked back down at Y/N as she hid her face into my shirt, scared. I had convinced her to watch a horror movie with me. I knew how much she hated watching horror movies. But I also knew how right now she would do about anything to make me feel better. I smirked as I moved my hands and I tickled her yelling “boo” at the same time causing her to scream and jump. I couldn’t contain my laughter as she frowned and started to swat my chest.

“Jesus that wasn’t funny!” Y/N shouted as I continued to howl with laughter. “You have to admit it was actually pretty hilarious” I smirked grabbing her hands to keep her from swatting at me. I held her hands above her head as I laid on top of her still tickling her.

“Stop…please….stop” Y/N gasped between laughing as I shook my head. “Nope,” I smirked, popping the ‘p.’ “Not until you say that I’m the best and that you love me and you give me a kiss” I teased not thinking she’d say it.

“Alright, alright, Jesus.. you’re the best, and I love you” Y/N smiled. Before she leaned up and pecked up my lips, but in that second, we both felt a spark. As the peck turned into another kiss…a longer kiss, I pulled away after a minute. I smiled looking down at her, unsure what to say.

I scrambled and got up off of her and sat next to her. “I’m so sorry about that I don’t know what came over me.” I rambled blushed and looking down at the bed so embarrassed and scared that I was going to lose my best friend.

“I know you love Emma, but I meant what I said, Jesus, I love you, and you are the best. I have always loved you since forever. “Y/N spoke up as she got up to leave.

“Wait, where are you going? Please don’t leave yet!” I exclaimed, grabbing her arm and stopping her from leaving.

“Truth is I love you, Y/N, not Emma. I have always loved you since we started in 8th grade. I didn’t want to tell you in fear you didn’t feel the same way, and I would lose my best friend!” I explained. “But I would love it if you would be my girlfriend” Y/N” I smiled.

“I would love too Jesus” Y/N smiled leaning over, pecking my lips. I smiled happy that Y/N I were together. The rest of the afternoon, Y/N and I hung up enjoying each other’s company until it was time for her to leave.

“You’re welcome to stay for dinner love we have more than enough food,” Mama offered Y/N as she was getting ready to leave. “Thank you, but I have to get home my grandparents are coming in” Y/N explained as Mama nodded and walked to the kitchen.

“I’ll call you later babe after dinner, I promise.” I smiled, hugging her before I kissed her. Mariana was coming down the stairs for dinner. When I was kissing Y/N, I wasn’t focusing on anything but kissing Y/N, so I didn’t hear Mariana gasp.

I pulled away and looked over at my twin, who had a big grin on her face. “What?” I asked with raised eyebrow confused about why she was so thrilled. “Oh, nothing except. MY OTP IS FINALLY TOGETHER!” Mariana Screamed before she headed towards the kitchen. I shook my head as I looked back at my girlfriend. “Let me know when you get home, babe” I smiled kissing her once more before she headed out the door.

No sooner did I close the door did I hear Mariana in the kitchen. “Y/N and Jesus are together I swear I saw it. They are so cute together! They have been my OTP since forever I have been rooting for them to get together since they met.” Mariana explained to Mom, Mama anyone who would listen to her.

“So when were you going to tell me you and Y/N were dating?” Mariana grilled me as I took my seat next to her. I rolled my eyes as I grabbed some salad and put it on my plate.

“What’s an Opt?” Mom asked

“It’s called OTP, and it stands for One True Pair mother” Mariana rolled her eyes.

“Watch your tone and your attitude miss thing” Mom warned giving my twin sister a pointed look.

“Sorry mom, but this is big news I have been waiting for this day since Jesus and Y/N met! This is amazing,” Mariana explained.

I would never have thought that my twin sister would be rooting for me and Y/N to get together and we would be her OTP. But then again this is Mariana we are talking about. So nothing should surprise me.

Excerpt from My Mom The Intergalactic Terrorist

From its place in my pocket, my phone began to buzz, filling the air with the silly ringtone I’d chosen for my mother; the X-files theme, I thought it would go well with the cartoonish alien I’d selected for her contact image. With a sigh, I pulled it out and mashed the answer button in frustration.

“Galileo,” my mother’s voice came.

“What?” I asked.

“What do you want to smell like this week?”

That was her way of asking what scent of body wash I wanted. For some reason, she’s convinced that people bathe to make them smell like something else and they put a lot of importance on said smell.

“Do they have anything like nature-ish? Any waterfall or stream?” I asked.

She went silent on the other end, but I could still hear the background noise of the grocery store, so I knew she didn’t hang up. I could hear her grab a bottle on the other end, making a thoughtful noise as she looked it over.

“How about Ocean Breeze?”

“That works.”

“Wonderful! And what would you like your hair to smell like?”

Groaning, I rolled my eyes, pinching the space between my brows. As I stepped, my foot connected with a loose stone, sending it skidding ahead of me on the sidewalk. I kicked it once again when I caught up to it but after that it was out of my sight.

“Just get me something clear. It doesn’t matter the smell.”

“Alright, but don’t get mad at me if I pick something you don’t like.”

She takes this all too seriously.

“You don’t have to call me every time you go grocery shopping mom.”

“But I do! I want to make sure I get the right stuff,” She complained.

“Whatever, I’ll see you at home.”

“Ok son, beep.”

She thinks you’re supposed to say beep when you turn the phone off. I think it’s because she heard the phone beep and thought it was another person. Whatever, I wish she’d go back to whatever planet she came from, and return me to whatever family she abducted me from.

Before I could put my phone away, it buzzed again, this time it played the text notification sound that I had set for my buddy Nikki; Area 51, an excellent match to the history channel “Aliens” meme, the one with the guy with funny hair, that I had chosen for her photo.

“Earth to space cadet. Come in space cadet,” the message read.

“This is space cadet. What’s the problem?”

Nikki insists on calling me space cadet, that or Stargazer.

“Food supply running low. Requesting backup.” Translation: “My parents are out of town again, and I don’t want to cook for myself, so can I come over and bum a meal off you guys?”

“Of course.”

Mom may be the strangest person in town, but she’s never been one to turn down a hungry child. I could already smell what she was cooking when I walked into the house. It smelled like spaghetti, one of the things she’s actually good at cooking. That’s not saying much though, all you have to do is boil water and make sure you don’t overcook the noodles.

The big pot on the stove was steaming and gurgling. My mother stood over it, watching to make sure it didn’t boil over, holding her soup spoon at her side like a soldier holding her sword.

“Nikki’s coming over, so we’re gonna have to set a place for three,” I said as I opened the fridge to grab a soda.

“Ah! Galileo, don’t sneak up on me like that,” my mother yelled, whipping around with her spoon in the air.

“Sorry, did you hear what I said about Nikki?”

“Oh, yes, we should be good. I made plenty of spaghetti.”

With that, my mother went back to watching her cooking. While she finished up, I got to work getting out the plates, bowls, and silverware. At our house, we have a strange conglomeration of tableware. We have chopsticks, forks, spoons, knives, cheese knives, ice cream scoopers, nutcrackers, tuning forks, fondue forks, and skewers all in the same drawer. A typical family would keep their usual tableware in one drawer and everything else in another, right? Not our family. Mom insists that all of these objects are used for eating and should, therefore, be stored together. What’s funny is watching her eat with a tuning fork.

When I set the table, I make sure to grab what we need for whatever we’re eating. If my Mom does it, there’s no telling what she’ll put on the table. You might end up with a punch bowl to eat your dinner out of with the fondue fork she brought you. That’s why I like it better when I do it. A knock on the door alerted me of Nikki’s arrival. Our doorbell doesn’t work; we don’t have enough visitors to warrant getting it fixed.

“I’ve got it,” I said, leaving my mom to finish up the food.

Nikki is my best friend, but I have to say she’s a total geek. She wears her curly hair up in two pigtails that look more like puff balls than anything, her two front teeth have a tiny gap between them, her bag is decorated in space memorabilia, and her clothes are always covered in alien propaganda. She’s one of those who loves sci-fi movies and staying up late watching alien conspiracy videos. If I have to hear about the Roswell UFO one more time, I’ll probably lose my mind.

“May I come in?” She asked, shuffling in place.

“If you aren’t scared of getting probed,” I teased.

Without a moment’s hesitation, she stepped over the threshold of my house, taking off her shoes hurriedly. Nikki’s Mom and dad own a company that does something with fuel, she explained it to me once, but I forgot. Her mom’s the president and her dad’s the CEO, so they’re often out of town on business. It’s not like they don’t like her or anything, they just don’t want their kids getting caught up in everything.

Nikki is the oldest of five, three boys and two girls, and they’re all a different shade of dark. Nikki’s the lightest, then her younger brother Dave, then John, then Sarah and Jamal are about the same. Her mother’s pretty light and her dad’s pretty dark, so some took after their mom and some their father. It makes a lot of people question if they all have the same dad, but they do.

“I brought something sure to tell us if your mother is an alien,” she whispered, checking to make sure my Mom was nowhere nearby.

“Oh god, what is it?”

Slowly, she pulled the device out from her bag, making sure to keep it hidden. It looked like a calculator and a GameBoy had a crack baby. There were all sorts of buttons and wires poking out in all directions. When she pushed the on button, the screen turned on, displaying nothing but white.

“What do you think?”

“I think you made someone on amazon very happy.”

“Come on Galileo, this is the Invader Finder 2000, does that sound fake to you?”

“It sounds like your parents need to monitor your spending.”

She didn’t like that too much. As she glared at me, she pushed a button, and a tiny little blue dot appeared on the screen.

“This machine scans the area for aliens, if it senses one, the blue dot will turn red. It’s supposed to do a bunch of other stuff, but I haven’t figured it all out yet,” she explained.

Of course she hadn’t. More than likely it didn’t have all the settings it claimed it did. She’d probably get home, push a button and it’d spit out the quadratic formula.

“Time for dinner,” My Mom called.

“Let’s take this baby for a test drive, shall we?” Nikki offered, proudly heading toward the kitchen.

Rolling my eyes, I followed behind her with my arms crossed. At least tonight I’m getting dinner and a show. The kitchen table was set with the large spaghetti pot in the center and the container of sauce sitting next to it. There was also a plate of buttered toast off to the side. My Mom noticed Nikki’s little device immediately, but she didn’t seem alarmed at all.

“Ooo, what’s that?” She asked, taking her place at the table.

“It’s a new game I bought,” Nikki lied.

“That sounds fun.”

There were no serving spoons or tongs for us to get our food with. Reaching into the pot, my mom grabbed a big handful of pasta and put it on her plate before dumping a load of sauce on top. Next to go for it was Nikki, after eating with us so many times, she was used to my mother’s craziness. She kept the device hidden under the table in her lap, where she could check it occasionally during the meal.

Once everyone had gotten what they wanted, we started eating. While Nikki and I twirled our pasta into little bites around our fork, my mother grabbed at her pasta with her hands, shoving what she could into her mouth before slurping the rest up like slimy intestines. Her face was covered in red sauce after only a few bites, making her look like a cannibal.

“Thanks again for letting me join you, Ms. M.”

“No problem Nikki. I don’t mind at all. Speaking of, where’d your parents go this week?”

“France. There’s supposed to be some big alternative fuel event going on,” Nikki replied, glancing down.

“That sounds cool. Did they tell you what it was about?”

“The only thing I remember was that it had something to do with some old algae. I didn’t really catch everything.”

“Algae? That sounds so cool!” My Mom replied excitedly, placing her sauce-covered hands on the table.

“I guess.”

Of course, the little light on Nikki’s screen stayed blue no matter how close she got it to my mother. Occasionally it would beep, but that was about it, and it wasn’t even loud enough to hear. It seemed she was getting desperate as she was trying to lean without looking suspicious.

“Say, Ms. M, wanna try my game out?” Nikki offered, holding out the little device.

My Mom tilted her head in curiosity, taking the device like it was a snake whose pattern she didn’t recognize. I guess since it was coming from Nikki she trusted it. As soon as the little device passed from Nikki’s hands, the dot turned bright red, then the entire screen turned to static before fading to all black.

“Oh no, I broke it!” My mother panicked.

“Don’t worry about it, I’m sure I can get it working again,” Nikki reassured her, trying to hide the triumphant grin on her face.

Groan, now I’m going to have to listen to her talk about how it’s “proven” now. Rolling my eyes, I went back to eating my noodles. Sadly, Nikki proved my suspicions right, as soon as dinner ended, while my mother started cleaning up, she dragged me back to the living room with an insane look in her eyes. Once she made sure my mother hadn’t followed, she pulled me down to sit next to her on the couch.

“Did you see that? Proof! Hard evidence. I can’t wait until my fans hear about this.”

Now when she says fans, she’s referring to the 200 people that follow her blog on Tumblr, although I’m pretty sure at least a fourth of them are porn bots. She’s continuously posting crazy stuff about Aliens on there, and she even has a whole segment dedicated to my Mom, but I refuse to read it. I’m scared to see what kind of crazy stuff she’s done that I don’t know about.

“Yeah, right. You saw how that thing was glitching out, it probably just short-circuited, and that’s why the dot changed color,” I explained.

“Come on, Stargazer, how come it only did that when I handed it to her? It didn’t do that all throughout dinner, so what was different?” Nikki questioned.

It’s hard to argue with her when she gets like this. No matter what I say, she’s going to turn it down because she’s already convinced herself, so I might as well just not even try.

“I don’t know. Maybe keeping it on so long made it overheat or something? It was just a coincidence, don’t get too excited.”

“Yeah, right. You just want to ruin this for me,” She said, already typing up a blog post on her phone.

“Would either of you like a cold cream sandwich?” My Mom said, appearing out of nowhere with three ice cream sandwiches in hand.

“Sure thing Ms. M,” Nikki laughed, taking the sandwich that was closest to her.

I took the one in the middle, leaving the last one for my Mom, who happily took it and sat down in the empty recliner next to the couch. The three of us tore the packaging off and dug into our sweet treats. Nikki and I took our bites slowly, trying not to hurt our teeth from the cold, but my Mom ate the whole thing in just a few huge bites. She visibly cringed, but still continued to take massive bite after massive bite.

“I’ll see you tomorrow, Gali. Thanks for letting me come over, Ms. M!”

Once she finished her ice cream, Nikki stood up to leave; her typical dine and dash maneuver. She had to be back home by a particular time, or the nanny would yell at her.

“No problem, my dear, feel free to come again,” My mother offered.

“See you at school, tinfoil head.”

Turning around, Nikki gave me the “loser” hand gesture before running off, nearly tripping on the uneven step that leads up to our front door. I headed up to my room after she left. Without her, I didn’t really have a reason to be out among the living, so I retreated into my sanctuary.

My room is the only place in the house where everything makes sense. Unlike the rest of the home, it looks like a sane human being resides within. The walls are covered in posters of my favorite shows and bands, my desk is neat and organized with my laptop in the middle, my clothes are put up, and my bed has matching pillows and bedding. It’s not a huge room, but there’s plenty of space for me to be me.

The bed creaked loudly when I flopped onto it. I pulled my phone out, plugged my headphones in, and turned on some of my favorite music. Personally, I prefer Techno, but I’m not opposed to a good rap song every once in a while, it all depends on what kind of mood I’m in, and right now I’m in a techno mood.

As my ears were filled with fun technological sounds, I stared up at the ceiling, thinking about Nikki’s stupid device. Not gonna lie, it was odd that it messed up right when my Mom touched it, but that doesn’t really mean anything. That was a piece of junk anyway. My Mom may be weird, but that doesn’t make her an alien.

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An Unexpected Surprise - Part 5

Requested: Yes

Word Count: 2,672

Warnings: A very mean mother

[My Teen Wolf Master List]

[Part 1] [Part 2] [Part 3] [Part 4] [Part 6]

Y/N looked at her exposed stomach in the bathroom mirror. She was wearing a sports bra and a pair of gym shorts with the elastic waistband rolled under her growing belly. She was now 7 months pregnant and the summer heat wasn't helping. She was constantly hot. She walked around with one of those water bottles with a fan, keeping herself cool when she needed it.

As Liam predicted, things didn't work out between him and Hayden. Hayden didn't want to be with someone who would constantly put her second, or in this case, third. Plus, she knew how important it was for Liam to be a father to his unborn baby. She decided to break up with him. Liam didn't fight for her. As much as he liked her and would miss her, his main priority was the baby.

Shortly after, Y/N moved into the spare bedroom across from Liam's room. He was there for Y/N 24/7. He held her hair back every time she got morning sickness. He went grocery shopping with one of his parents to make sure they wouldn't buy anything that would make her sick and he always managed to sneak in her latest craving in the shopping cart, which was constantly a pint of her favorite ice cream.

Also, he wouldn't hesitate to run out in the middle of the night when she was suddenly in the mood for tacos. He would stay up with her and watch random movies on Netflix when she couldn't sleep. He would make sure to write down all of her appointments with Melissa and Deaton on the calendar in the kitchen. He would walk with her around the neighborhood every morning and evening to make sure she was getting some exercise. Liam made sure he was on top of everything.

"Y/N?" Liam knocked on the bathroom door. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah," she let out a long and tired sigh. "Come in."

When Liam opened the door, his lips formed a huge smile, one that reached the corner of his eyes. He put the pamphlet he had in his hand on top of the counter and placed his hands on her exposed belly. "Hi, baby," he mumbled before kissing her belly. "Two more months and I get to meet you."

She looked down at Liam with a soft smile. Her heart melted. Liam had gone above and beyond to be there for her throughout the entire pregnancy. Being best friends with Liam, she already knew what a kind and sweet guy he was, but she had seen a different side of him. He was tender, caring, very protective, and loving.

Liam stood up and locked eyes with Y/N. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing," she lied.

"Liar. You're reeking with..." he trailed for a second, trying to pinpoint her emotions. "Sadness?" He asked confused, wondering why she’s sad when she doesn’t look sad.

Her shoulders dropped. "I'm fat!" She cried out.

"Hey, hey, hey," Liam repeated as he wrapped his arms around her, comforting her. "You're not fat."

"I look like a whale!" She babbled as she hugged him back.

"No, you don't."

"Yes, I do. That's what all our classmates where calling me before the school year ended. They were right."

Liam almost let out a scowl as he remembered the kids in the hallway calling Y/N names behind her back. She had to stop him every time before he would lose his control and beat up some punk ass kid for being disrespectful.

"You are not a whale," Liam sighed as he pulled back and rested his hands on her shoulders. He gently squeezed her shoulders. "You're having a baby, our baby, and I think you look beautiful. I mean you're practically glowing."

Tears formed in Y/N's eyes. "Now you're just saying sweet things to be nice and make me feel better," she sniffled.

Liam chuckled, remembering the first time he didn't know how to deal with her crazy hormones a few months ago. He cupped her cheeks, making her look up to him and lock her eyes with his baby blue eyes. "I mean it, Y/N."

"Then, why are you laughing?"

"Because I've come a long way with your hormones," he chuckled.

Y/N giggled. "You were so scared and didn't know how to deal with it or handle me and my crazy emotions. At one point, you looked like a scared puppy."

Liam laughed with her. "Yup, it's a good thing you moved in. I picked it up quickly. I mean you went from sad, upset, to crying all in 5 minutes. 3 months ago, I wouldn't even know what to do."

"Thank you," she smiled at him.

"You're welcome."

Her eyes flickered to the pamphlet. "What's that?"

"Oh," he suddenly remembered why he came to her in the first place. "I got a pamphlet about the free Lamaze classes they give down at the Y. I think we should go. I want both of us to be ready and know what to expect." Again, Y/N's heart melted. Liam was truly taking care of her and the baby. He hadn’t once broken his promise.

She had looked up Lamaze classes, but they were completely out of her budget. Technically, she didn't have a budget. She wanted to get a part-time job somewhere, but Liam's parents refused to have her working. They wanted her to relax and not be anymore stressed than she already was. Liam's parents were more than happy to finically support her and the baby. When she saw the prices for the classes, she didn't want to ask them to spend so much money. Instead, she let it go and reminded herself to YouTube Lamaze classes when she got closer to her due date.

She sighed before she pulled Liam in for a tight hug. Liam immediately wrapped his arms around her. "I don't know what I'd do without, Liam," she mumbled.

"I'll always be here for you," he whispered back. "For the both of you." She kissed his cheek before she pulled back to see him smiling at her. "Are you ready to go to the grocery store?" He asked.

She rolled her eyes. Liam told his parents they would do the grocery shopping today as walking around each isle would be good for the baby. "Almost. Let me put a shirt on."

"Okay, meet you downstairs," he said before he left the bathroom.

*****

"Liam, check this out!" Liam stopped and turned around to see Y/N balance a small can of almonds on the top of her belly. "Ta-ta!" She cheered when she removed her hands and the can didn't tip over.

"You're so funny," Liam shook his head as he chuckled before pushing the cart again.

"It never gets old," Y/N smiled as she put the can in the cart. She reached in for a chip from the open bag they had sitting on the cart as they walked down the cereal isle.

"Captain Crunch or Fruit Loops?" Liam asked as he stopped in front of the two choices. When Y/N didn't say anything, he looked up, only to see her frozen in place and looking straight ahead. Liam's head turned to the direction she was looking at and stumbled back, making sure Y/N was behind him. Her mother stood frozen, looking at Y/N and Liam. Her eyes scanned down to Y/N's baby bump.

"Mom," Y/N whispered carefully. She hadn't seen or talked to her mom since she kicked Y/N out of the house. Shortly after, Y/N gave her parents a few days to cool off before calling them, hoping to work things out. When they ignored all her calls, she realized they meant what they said. Eventually, she gave up on them.

Y/N's mom shook her head. "I don't have a daughter," she said before she turned her cart around and walked away.

The words stung as warm tears began to form in Y/N's eyes. Liam walked towards Y/N's mom before she turned to the next aisle. "Hey," he glared at her as he stood in front of her cart. She tried to move to the side to go around, but Liam refused to let her go by placing his hands on the cart, preventing her from leaving.

"You have an amazing daughter. Even though our baby isn't here yet, she's already a fantastic mother, despite the horrible role model she had-"

"I was not horrible! She made terrible decisions all on her own."

"A horrible mother wouldn't leave their daughter home all the time-"

"It's my job-"

"I don't care. A mother would be there for her child, regardless how hard it might be. Do you know how I know that? Your daughter shows me that every time she sacrifices something to make sure she'll be there and to provide for our child.

"You have no idea what you're missing out and years from now when your grandchild asks about you and your husband, it's going to kill me to say, 'they never wanted you and they never wanted to be a part of your life'. So when you decide to change your mind and beg for a second chance - because I know one day you will - you won't get one. I'll make damn sure you regret walking out on all of us."

Liam turned around and walked away from Y/N’s mother. He wasn’t going to wait for a response from her. Instead, he walked towards Y/N, who was absolutely speechless. He wiped the fallen tears from her cheeks before he wrapped his arms around Y/N for tight hug. "Let's go," he whispered.

"What about all of the stuff?" She sniffled.

"Forget it. I'll come back later with dad. Let's get you out of here. Let's go to the park and get some ice cream. What do you say?"

"Okay." Her voice was sad and broken, and Liam hated it. He didn't want her to feel this way. He wanted to take away her pain and put a smile on her face. He pulled back and looked into her sad, tear filled eyes. In that moment, he vowed to always make her happy no matter what.

*****

Liam parked his truck in the driveway and turned off the ignition. He turned around to see Y/N looking down at her fiddling fingers. He reached out, making her heart skipped a beat the second his rough hand covered her small hands.

"I'm sorry," Liam whispered. "I didn't mean to scare you."

She swallowed hard. "That's okay." She turned her hand around and grabbed his. She looked down at their locked hands, realizing something she never had before, how perfect they fit together. She sighed as she leaned her head back on the headrest and looked at Liam. "I can't thank you enough for everything today."

"It was nothing."

"It was something and it meant a lot. You stood up to my mother. Then, you took me to the park, letting me vent and cry on your shoulder, only to cheer me up with ice cream and your silly jokes."

"My jokes are not silly. They're funny," he teased, making her giggle.

"But, seriously, Liam," she placed her other hand on top of their locked hands, "you have been nothing but good to me, and I'm so sorry I was such a bitch to you at the beginning of all of this."

Liam leaned in and wiped the fallen tear from her cheeks with his free hand before cupping her cheek. He looked into her eyes, deep into her soul, "I appreciate you apologizing. I'm not going to lie; it hurt like hell, Y/N. I really did love you..."

"Do you still love me now?" She whispered as her heart raced with fear.

Before Liam could respond, his phone rang with Lydia's ringtone. Liam let out a frustrated sigh at Lydia's timing. Y/N pulled away from his hand and looked out the passenger window as Liam answered.

"What?" He asked, annoyance evident in his voice. "Oh, okay. We're already here. We'll be right up," he said as he hung up.

Y/N turned around to face him. Within a second his voice went from annoyed to concerned by the time he hung up on Lydia. Y/N mentally cursed herself for not listening in on their phone call instead of trying to figure out what Liam would have said if Lydia hadn't interrupted.

"Is everything okay?" Y/N’s voice was filled with worry.

"I don't know. Lydia said they're all waiting for us in your room," Liam said before he quickly hopped out of his truck and walked around to open her door. He helped her get out of the truck before closing the door and led her to the house with his hand on the small of her back. Liam kept up with her waddling pace. He didn't rush her nor did he want to. He already knew why Lydia was calling and he wasn't about to ruin the surprise.

"I hope everything is okay," Y/N said as she held on to the rail while climbing up the stairs with Liam right behind her. "I mean what if something supernatural is here, Liam? What do we do? Should we leave? Can we leave?" She rushed with so much nervousness.

"Hey, Y/N," Liam said before they reached her bedroom door. He placed his hands on her shoulders. "Everything is going to be fine."

"You don't know that, Liam."

Liam smirked and opened the door, revealing the pack members in the middle of her new, freshly painted pink room. Y/N scanned her room. Y/N's bed and dresser had been rearranged to make room for the baby's crib, a dresser with a changing table on top, and a beautiful white rocking chair in the corner of the room next to a small shelf with a baby lamp and new baby books. Above the crib we're white glittery letters that spelled out 'Princess'. She had been nagging Liam about buying baby furniture and move her room around to make sure everything they needed would fit.

Her eyes landed on her pack mates. Scott, Stiles, Mason, and Corey looked exhausted and sweaty. Probably from lifting and moving everything around. Malia and Lydia had pink paint stains on their dirty worn out clothes. It was hard to believe Lydia had anything old and worn out. Malia had pink smeared fingerprints on her face, probably from scratching or touching her face while she was painting.

"You guys! You didn't have to do this," Y/N said with tears in her eyes.

"It was all Liam's idea," Lydia smiled. "Liam and his parents bought all the furniture a few months ago. He called and told us about the surprise plan he had for you. We wanted to help and be a part of it. We pitched in and bought the paint and paint brushes."

"We painted the room," Malia added with a smile as she looped her arm with Lydia’s.

"We moved out the furniture," Scott smiled as he wrapped an arm around his best friend.

"It wasn't so easy without any werewolf strength," Stiles said tiredly.

"And we assembled the baby furniture," Mason said.

"Don't worry! We doubled checked and tested everything with the fattest watermelon we could find. It's safe to say your baby is in good hands," Corey smiled.

Y/N's heart was filled with joy and love. She looked at her friends, who were the family she always wanted. She knew her baby would be loved and cherished by her uncles and aunts. She placed her hand on her baby bump before she turned around to face Liam. Happy tears fell down her cheeks again. "Damn hormones," she chuckled as she reached in to wipe the tears with the back of her hand.

"It's okay," Liam chuckled as he pushed her hand away and brushed her tears away with the pad of his thumb.

"Thank you," Y/N whispered as she hugged him. "For everything."

"Of course," Liam said as he tightened his arms around her. She pulled back a little to look at him. "You know, I'd do anything for our baby girl and you, right?" He asked. She nodded. "And in case you haven't noticed, I'm already so in love with our Princess." Y/N chuckled as she nodded again.

And I'll always love her mother, he thought to himself as he remembered her question before he kissed her forehead. dylan sprayberry

Released(20 pt2)

Camila

Knocking I wait before twisting the nob. "Stanley...you ok baby?"

She looks up from a book taking off her headphones. "Yeah I just ignore her now."

Sitting I sigh. The fact that my two oldest are having some kind of disagreement hurts me. Am I not doing something right as a parent?

"What's going on with you two?"

She sighed setting her things aside. "I'm trying to look out for her but for some reason she thinks I'm taking over her life or something. Her words cut deep and it's getting really hard to keep my sanity and be the bigger person." Her eyes tear up.

"What started all of this?"

"Just a uh...disagreement on a topic."

"Something to do with school or a boy maybe?"

"Something like that but I can't say I don't want to betray her like she already thinks I do. Just because she's being mean and what not doesn't mean I have to send that same vibe back but I know this will come to a end soon."

I always thought I was the parent my kids would come to and just talk. Uh these teenage years are killing me already and they just entered it. Figuring being in the house right now isn't gonna have her opening up. Since I need to make a quick run I asked Stanley to come with me. As I drove I noticed her tense body language.

Mona is a very spoiled girl...had been since she was born. Chris and I tried our best to raise her to be basically what she isn't right now. The last thing I wanted is her to be this cold hearted person but a parent can only do so much. At a certain age the child starts to make decisions on their own and eventually learn important life lessons.

"Do you think we took you in as charity?"

Stanley shyly shrugged. "I know you and my mom were at a time friends and when I was taken in by you guys it was because she went to jail."

"We don't get anything for having you. There's no government check or special privileges or anything like that. You became someone dear to both chris and I heart. I just couldn't stand back while you lost your mom and do nothing about it. Both Chris and I love you so much Stanley please believe that."

"I try I swear I do but. When we're all together you know everyone sometime I just can't help knowing that this isn't my family. No one is related to me and then I get people reminding me daily. I hate feeling that I do not belong here."

So much I did not know. Who is bullying my child.

"We may not be blood related but I treat you the same way I do to those I pushed out. I have the same love for you I care about you and hate that you've been feeling this way. Why didn't you come to anyone sooner?"

"I caused enough trouble behind the papers....I didn't want to seem ungrateful for what you and dad I mean Chris did for me."

"You still call us mom and dad regardless what Mona says. I just wish I knew what was behind all this. What are you holding for her is it the boy she's interested in? What does she have against you that's making you shy back and allow her to disrespect you like this? I can tell you now not that I want this to happen with you two but me and Rebecca almost dropped our entire friendship we even fought. At the end of the day if you really love her you should do what's right no matter how she's feels about the truth."

She looked at me then down to her hands. This situation is making me real nervous because I'm starting to think it's not just the boy or whatever had Mona acting up. It's all starting to look like something more serious than I thought and I'm scared to find out the truth. I'm not emotionally ready for whatever storm is coming.

As I pull into the grocery store parking lot finding a good enough spot I turn off the car.

"I like Julian." She said before I reached for the door handle. "And he likes me back....we confessed this to each other and we agreed to not fully take in a relationship but have an understanding."

"Oh...ok."

"Mona said if I spoke on her business she would tell someone and get me sent to be with another family since it is frowned on for foster kids and members of their foster family to be together." She wiped her face fumbling with her fingers a nervous habit of her's. "I don't want to lose you guys."

"You won't and that's something I can promise." ******* Finishing the last braid I sigh standing from my mirror. Chris groans walking into our room fall face first on the bed. Being the great husband he is he put the twins to bed after feeding and bathing both.

"Why did we have two more after the last one?"

Smiling I grab one of his lotions sitting on his butt. "Because someone doesn't like to use condoms and can't seem to keep his baby supplier under control."

Working the lotion into my hands they rub onto his bare back. His deep slow breaths and occasional grunts let me know I'm doing good.

"I blame you and that gold between your thighs. It's not my fault you stay tight and moist all these years."

"Uh shut up with your dirty talk and turn over." I was now sitting facing him. "What did you and Maurice do earlier?"

"I just wanted to spend some time with him. We played some ball at the academy messed around in one of the recording studios it was fun."

"Well that was nice what made you wanna do that?"

His hands squeeze my thighs as mind rub on his pecks. He has kept his nice toned body and I love it.

"After talking with Carlton I thought I could take some of my own advise especially with the kids. I'm taking Maliki with me to work tomorrow see what I can get out of him cause you know he's getting older and I wanna get some good advise in him now."

Looking at my husband is my favorite thing to do. This man is my everything my life was changed for the better with him with. I have my kids because of him my career turned in a better direction with his help.

"Your such a great father." He chuckled deep. "I'm serious baby you really are."

"Well they say behind a great man is a greater woman. If I'm great then you are the worlds greatest."

I couldn't help the pink faded color on my cheeks.

"I guess personally I think I could use some work in the parenting department. I mean lately I feel so left out with the girls. Did you know their basically not sisters anymore at lease on Mona's end."

He frowned sitting up keeping me on him. "Nah what you mean?"

"Their going through some kind of loyalty thing like me and Rebecca back then. Someone is in Mona's head and she's turned on Stanley. Earlier she asked why we allow Stanley to call us mom and dad because she's not our daughter and then called her the charity we brought in."

This is such a horrible situation. Being that I've been through something serious like this I know the odds of a good out come is very slim. Mona is so much like me I just know it'll take something drastic to open her stubborn eyes.

"So it's like you and devin? Stanley must be warning her about this person whoever the hell is it and Mona isn't listening...all I know is it better not be some ugly knuckle head boy."

"Their at that age baby it probably is a boy." He sigh rolling his eyes. "I didn't think we would have to go through this so...early their only fourteen. Baby Stanley thinks she doesn't belong here like she's some outsider. What can we do to convince her it's nothing like that...I know I've said this a million maybe a billion times but I love that girl like I birthed her and this hurts that she's feeling like this and we're just now finding out."

Seeing me getting emotional he pulled me in kissing my head.

"Relax we can get through this just like we get through everything else. We've raised amazing girls this is just something they are going through. It's sad to see them so distant and not like themselves but baby all we can do is parent and let them work things out. If they don't come to us we can't help but they'll be back to normal in no time. Mona has to learn her lesson just like you did."

"I didn't want her to have to...I almost lost my best friend and sister from something just like this. My girls shouldn't be going through this!"

"Yo se lo se baby....it's gonna be ok." *I know I know baby* "Come on we gotta get you relaxed. Let me give you a massage."

Laying on my stomach I hear him rubbing his hands together. "Ok but no funny business."

Laughing he started on my lower back. "Yeah....right."

Rebecca

"Why did you schedule this appointment so early."

Rolling my eyes I slip my shades over them stepping out our car. "So neither of us could back out for anything work related."

"You mean me? These shady comments gotta stop Rebecca foreal babe."

After signing us in I lead to some open seats. "One I'm not being shady not everything is some kind of blow to you and second your not the only one who works so I could've been talking about myself. Stop being so selfish not everything is about you Carlton."

It's way to early for BS right now and I really would rather not go in with us arguing already.

"I'm not you started it with the petty comments it's not my fault-"

"But it is because you took it the way you wanted to. I'm really not trynna argue right now Carlton seriously...relax for once."

"There you go again."

Imma kill him.

"Mr and Mrs Willis? Follow me please." The receptionist says with a bright smile.

We sit in the two chairs opposite of the doctor. "Welcome how are you guys this morning?"

"I'm great my wife seems to be feeling a little shady but what's new?"

Cutting my eyes I sigh out my nose putting on a smile to the therapist. "I'm also great my husband may think I'm being shady but that's understandable with the lonely dark nights I've spent in our bed alone. I guess it's just grown on me."

"Wow getting right things huh? Why don't we get to why we are here today."

"We need to work on communication in our marriage." I say crossing my legs.

"Ok that's normal. Marriage is never easy two different souls coming together as one will bring complications. Now how long have you two been married?"

"11 years we got married the same year our first child was born."

Nodding she writes in her note pad. "So you say communication is an issue? What was it that stopped it in the first place."

"Work for the both of us started to...pick up. Scheduled dates would get pushed back so it just wasn't the same."

"Mr Willis you haven't said much if anything just yet."

He sighed slouching. "It's to early for all this for me."

Me rolling my eyes caught the therapist attention. "Problem?"

"Yes him. This is suppose to be helping us but timing is getting in the way of us getting our marriage back on track. So you'd rather be sleeping than being here saving eleven years worth of love and emotions problems and two freaking kids."

"Excuse me for being tired Rebecca!"

"Ok ok let's just calm down. I don't want things getting to far ahead." The doctor says yet gets ignore by us both.

"I do what I do for her so she can live comfortable without a want in the world but all I get in return is nagging! Constantly every got damn day soon as I get home."

"Reminding you of the family YOU HELPED ME CREATE NEEDS YOU IS NOT ME NAGGING YOU! That is me loving you and staying by your side supporting your career over my own. This producing job has gotten into your head I don't even know who you are most of the time."

Chuckling he stood ruffling his hair. "I'm doing this shit for you and it's like you don't even recognize me trying."

"How is not speaking trying Carlton? Yes it was my idea but remember you said and I quote "if that's what you think we need I'm all for it". Was it a lie or just something to get me quite?"

He shook his head starting to pace the room.

"Ok I see where the root is and I'm more than sure we can work things out between you two in no time. Mr.Willis could you come sit back down please."

He looks at me slowly coming and taking his seat again. The doctor hands me a tissue to wipe away tear I didn't even notice had started falling.

"If I can I'd just like to first say that this step you all are taking coming to a complete stranger bringing them into your personal life is big. So many people have taken up a defensive strategy of keeping problems small or big bottled up inside letting them grow to a point where they explode at any random time. It's clear as can be the love you two have still blooming and very much fresh."

We look at each other loosening our bodies relaxing into the leather seats.

"My job will be to just be the voice of reason to help you come to a happier ending together. In the end I can guarantee as a team we can get you all back to that honeymoon stage in the relationship." She smiled before standing. "Now there was a study that shows the consumption of alcohol can cause a uh word vomit as it is effect. Loosen you up and let how you truly feel be known by word or mouth. Since the saying is drunken words and sober thoughts....but I'm not going to try and get you guys drunk."

She goes to a cabinet taking out to two crystal glasses. "So vodka or rum?"

answers to anon

Is a kiss considered cheating? yes

Have you ever faked orgasm? i don’t think so

If you could have one superpower, what would it be? FLY 100%

Do you think you are going to be rich in 7-8-9 years? haha definitely not

Tell us some funny drunk story. i’ve only been ‘drunk’ once and it wasn’t super exciting or anything. i remember running around in circles in the grass w/ my friends seeing how many i could do before i fell down or threw up lmfao

Why are you no longer together with your ex? well, i’ve had quite a few ex’s and none of them are even SLIGHTLY comparable to my current girlfriend. tbh no one ever could be in any way. she’s my soulmate and i wouldn’t trade her for the world.

If you had to choose one way to die, what would it be? in my sleep, in bed with my gf holding my hand.

What are your current goals? to get through the next 6 months or so without too many hurdles, and to do exceedingly well with the certificate i’m planning to get in order to get a full-time job so i can live by my gf (:

Do you like someone? obviously yes ^^

Who was the last person to disappoint you? probably one of my old friends

Do you like your body? i’m beginning to honestly

Can you keep a diet? if i put all my effort into it, i’m sure i could manage. i just don’t want to lmao.

If the whole world listened to you right now, what would you say? love yourself first

Do you work? yep

If you could choose only one food to eat to the rest of your life, what would it be? probably either cheese or potatoes

Would you get a tattoo? already have one, want soooo many more

Something you don’t mind spending all your money on? presents for my girlfriend or my friends

Can you drive? yes, i wouldn’t have a relationship if i couldn’t tbh

When was the last time someone told you you were beautiful? uhhh idk

What was the last thing you cried for? a stupid reason lol

Do you keep a journal? yeah sorta

Is life fun? sometimes

Is farting in front of people irrelevant? it’s funny ?? lmao

What’s your dream car? definitely a 67′ chevrolet impala

Are grades in school important? yeah i mean, they weren’t my biggest priority when i was in high school, but they are pretty important if you’re wanting to get into a 4 year college and whatnot.

Describe your crush. she’s fucking stunning. so intelligent. extremely sweet and kind. overall the most amazing woman i’ve ever known. (besides my mom ofc)

What was the last book/movie that really impressed you? the glass castle. great movie.

What was your last lie? probably about eating lunch - i always tell my gf or mom that i ate, when sometimes i don’t (not because i’m restricting myself but because i’m either too lazy to make food or because nothing sounds appetizing).

Dumbest lie you ever told? i haven’t told many crazy lies or anything that i can remember..

Is crying in front of people embarrassing? nah, at least not to me. i always try to tell my friends, “crying is good. we all need to do it. don’t worry about looking dumb because you won’t to me.”

Something you did and you are proud of? uhh well it’s not a huge deal but on my last trip up to see my gf, i gave this lady at the grocery store a ride to her house because it was pouring rain and she lost her keys. i felt really bad, i wasn’t gonna make her walk home with a whole cart of groceries (she had a limp and was on the older side) and although it wasn’t my safest idea, it was still nice and she called me her savior like 100 times and said i was an angel from heaven, so that was sweet. (:

What’s your favourite cocktail? i don’t drink lol

Something you are good at? umm idk tbh.. i’m pretty decent at basketball????

Do you like small kids? yes as long as they’re respectful and sweet

How are you feeling right now? pretty good!

What would you name your daughter/son? son: atticus / daughter: mable

What do you need to be happy? music

Is there some you want to punch in the face right now? yes always

What was the last gift you received? i think it was when my friend zoe surprised me with sweet-tarts on my break at work and it was so nice. i love her sm.

What was the last gift you gave? it’s technically not a gift but i just mailed  some random cute stuff to my gf and she opened it on skype like an hour or so ago (:

What was the last concert you went to? green day in st. louis, missouri!!

Favourite place to shop at? either h&m or old navy

Who inspires you? morgan freeman tbh

How old were you when you first got drunk? like 16 i think

How old were you when you first got high? probably early 16 also.

How old were you when you first had sex? 17 i think ?? or i had just turned 18

When was your first kiss? we don’t speak of that

Something you want to do until the end of this year? bANG MY GF

Is there something in the past you wish you hadn’t done? ohhh so many things

Post a selfie. ok i will 

Who are you most comfortable around? honestly cami

Name one thing that terrifies you. the ocean

What kind of books do you read? the typical basic-as-fuck teen novels

What would you tell your 12 year old self? don’t spend so much time on any of those people. you’ll lose them all in like 5 years. it’s so fckn sad but true like… i am not friends with a single person i was friends with back then.

What is your favourite flower? roses bc i’m baSIC-AS-FUCK

Any bad habits you have? uhhhh overthinking, comparing myself, not eating when i’m stressed, talking to people that aren’t worth my time, giving too many damn chances.. the list goes on and on.

What kind of people are you attracted to? idk nice people?? people who have the same sense of humor as me. idk like if you like trump,,,, we probably wouldn’t work out lmao.

What was the last thing you cried for? i think i already answered this but it was over someone i’m no longer friends with. idk it was earlier today & not worth it.

Is there something you don’t eat? Some food that truly disgust you? PINEAPPLE 

Are you in love? very

Something you find romantic? i like random notes or texts or cute shit to remind you that the other person is thinking about u

How long was your longest relationship? it is the current one i am in - 1 year and over 8 months so far.

What are 3 things that irritate you about the same sex? uhhh idk this is a weird question for me

What are 3 things that irritate you about the opposite sex? again ?? it’s weird ??

What are you saving money for? i should be saving it for moving away lmao. but i’m using most of my money on christmas presents for my gf, friends & parents.

How would you describe your bad side? HANGRY

Are you actually a good person? Why? idk think so ? maybe ? but sometimes i think i’m the worst person ever so ????

What are you living for? my future plans with my girlfriend honestly & cause i have the sweetest niece now (’:

Have you ever done anything illegal? yeah

Do you like your body? some of these questions are repeating lol ^ it’s also Q #11

Have you ever made someone feel bad about themselves intentionally? yeah but not directly i don’t think :/

Ever sent nudes? all day erryday

Have you ever cheated on someone? nah

Favourite candy? anything sour especially sour jolly ranchers uggfuugfgf

Is there a blog you visit every day, or almost every day? Tag it! @wulfwire it’s my alpha gay (; she’s da best, go follow her !!!

Do you play any computer games? What is your favourite game? i don’t really have time to play anymore :// 

Favourite TV series? THE OFFICE UHGGHHFGHD

Are you religious? Does God exist? i used to be christian and believe in god and whatnot, now i guess you’d call me agnostic?? like i believe in *something* but not in ‘God’ necessarily. 

What was the last book you read? Did it impress you and why? i haven’t read in so longgggg

What do you think about vegetarianism/veganism? i mean, you do you. i know for a fact i couldn’t do it because i’m so picky and depend on dairy products so i know i could never go vegan and idk man it’s just so much work.

How long have you been on Tumblr? since july of 13′ so wow. over 4 years… 0.0

Do you like Chineese food? ehh. i’m trying to like it more!

McDonalds or Subway? mcdonalds probably.

Vodka or whiskey? neither bleh

Alcohol or drugs? drugs ?? i guess - only if weed counts ??

Ever been out of your province/state/country? yes many times

Meaning behind your blog name? don’t wanna talk about it

What are you scared of? lots of things; insects mainly, and open water - like not even just the ocean, but even lakes and ponds too. 

Last time you were insulted? i can’t remember ?? damn, that’s a great feeling

Most traumatic experience? probably the time i was having seizures for 5 years straight. thankfully i’ve been seizure free for about 6 years now.

Perfect date idea? something corny or cheesy idk. i love simple things like going to a park and talking for hours and eating ice cream and laughing about nonsense.

Favourite app on your phone? tumblr for sure, or 8-ball pool *cause i’m such a cool kid* 

What colour are the walls in your room? navy blue

Do you watch Youtube? Who is your favourite youtuber? always and forever a fothermucker (; @jackskellin

Share your favourite quote. “i’d rather be hated for who i am, than loved for who i am not.” - miles mckenna 

What is the meaning of life? who knows, man. just enjoy the ride.

Do you like horror movies? eh not really, i’m a total baby. but my new friend is probably gonna end up making me like them cause that’s all she watches.

Have you ever made your mum cry? What happened? yeah probably a bunch of times. we used to fight all the time. we both weren’t mentally great a few years ago. mainly due to my dad dealing with being an alcoholic. we’re much better now, thankfully.

Do you feel lucky or special in a way? yeah i definitely feel lucky a lot of the time.

Can you keep a secret? always.

Hold On (I Still Need You) Ch 2

takes place very early on in season 3a. its basically missing moments and different drinks (read on Ao3)

Lavender Tea

She finds dead bodies. That’s her new hobby, Lydia Martin: genius, queen bee of BHHS, and supernatural magnet for dead bodies. She finds herself losing sleep and feels that there’s not enough concealer in the world to cover the dark circles that she finds in the morning. Tonight’s no different. Her mom’s not home and the dark seems different ever since sophomore year. She remembers reading about how lavender tea can make someone drowsy and vaguely recalls seeing a box of it in her cupboards somewhere. Her search of the cupboards leaves her empty handed but she has a test tomorrow morning on the Heart Of Darkness and Ms Blake’s tests actually make her think a little. So she needs sleep.

Plus the circles under her eyes are almost as dark as Peter Hale’s soul at this point.

She grabs her coat, purse and keys, not bothering to change her clothes. A tank and tights wouldn’t be the worst thing to be seen in, considering her list of bad outfits included a hospital gown and her birthday suit. Anyways, she thinks, it's 4 in the morning. No one’s awake anymore.

She pulls up to the supermarket and walks briskly, pulling her coat tight across her chest, the cold sending a shiver down her back. She grabs a basket at the front, deciding to grab a few more things besides the tea. Lydia mentally runs over the things absent from her fridge. She grabs some salad supplies and some strawberry yogurt, ignoring her mom’s allergy. Besides everyone who knew Natalie Martin knew that her favorite flavor of anything was red wine. She runs her eyes over the shelves, looking for something she could be forgetting, turning the corner absently. She finds herself turning straight into someone’s chest, the force and shock sending her back.

“What the he- Lydia?” she looks up to see Stiles, headphones dangling around his neck, music forgotten as he stares at her like he can’t believe what he’s seeing.

“Stiles, why exactly are you trying to run me over? She rubs her forehead, vowing that if he leaves a mark, she will end him. When the hell did his chest get so hard anyways? Her pajamas flash in her mind and suddenly her tank top and tights seem trivial and dear god how come the one time she leaves the house without makeup is the day she runs into Stiles. She roams her eyes down his body, her gaze lingering on his arms, the ghosts of muscles hidden under his t shirt. His hair looks pretty good for 4 am and god help her even the plaid bottoms he has on look nice on him. She brings her eyes up to find him doing the same thing she had just been.

He catches her gaze and blushes, acting as if he hadn’t just been checking her out, which was funny cause he’s been checking her out since junior high. He suddenly seems very interested in the Fiber One box on his left.

“So… uh what are you doing here?”

She raises an incredulous eyebrow in response.

“What do you think I’m doing here Stiles?”

“Right, I mean like what are you doing awake at 4 in the morning?” The answer to his question seems a little hard to get out so she counters with her own question.

“What are you doing awake at 4 in the morning?” It’s a childish response but she’s tired and wants to sleep and now she’s irritated because there’s no way she’s gonna get any sleep now that she knows what Stiles Stilinski’s bed head looks like. (It looks really good but Lydia is not going to think about that cause this is Stiles, for the love of god.)

(She’s gonna be thinking about this for days to come)

He shrugs in response. “My dad’s working late and I can’t sleep.”

“Me neither.” The words leave her mouth before she can think about it. Stiles frowns, his eyebrows doing that crease they do when he’s worried.

“Why? Are you sick?”  

“No, I just can’t sleep that well now days.”

He nods in understanding. “Nightmares?”

“Something like that.”

She’s not about to tell him that her dreams are haunted by Peter Hale and his hand wrapped around her throat because then he’ll tell Scott and he’ll be worried enough to tell Allison, who’d then worry about her and try to talk to her. And Allison has better things to worry about. She looks at Stiles who’s dark circles are even worse than hers. And the sight of them compels her to say it, “You know, if you can’t sleep, lavender tea has a relaxing and sedative property that helps. I find that it really works.” she offers.

He smiles at her, not his spastic “there’s a body in the woods” kind of smile. The kind of smile makes her chest feel tight and her pulse race. This smile is all warmth and kindness and admiration and she realizes that she hasn’t seen him smile like that in a while. Which may be a good thing cause that smile makes her feel irrational. Like when he smiles at her in a grocery store at 4 in the morning and she hears herself ask him if he wants to go home with her and prepare for the english test while drinking lavender tea.

He stares at her, not answering and panic rises in her chest.

“You don’t have to. I just thought that well, I peer reviewed you paper the other day on symbolism and you could use my help.” She snipes. His answer is in his smile, his eyes lighting up. He grabs her basket emptying the contents into his own.

“Come on. If we’re doing this, I’m gonna need potato chips.” He turns to go down the aisle to grab his oil and fat infested snack and he misses her smile behind him.

They end up at her kitchen table, books open and highlighters in their hands, potato chips by his side. She’s put her hair up in a bun and ran up to put on some lip gloss while he prepared their tea. He makes snide comments about the characters and she blames her laughter on the late time.

“So the Congo river is also a symbol. It symbolizes movement towards a common goal and that's what the- Stiles are you even writing any of this down?”

“I can’t focus on English Lydia.” He stretches his neck back and gives her a delicious view of his throat and her mouth goes dry. He rotates his neck, moaning a little at sore muscles and she gets up to get a drink of water before she does something stupid. (like jump Stiles Stilinski in the middle of her kitchen which is ridiculous cause this is Stiles Stilinski.) When she turns back he has his book closed and his head on the table.

“ I can’t study anymore. I’m too sleepy.”

“That's because lavender’s an aphrodisiac. It decreases your heart rate and blood pressure helping you relax.”

He lifts his head up and quirks his eyebrows at her. “What? No scientific name to go along with that explanation?”

She doesn’t miss a beat. “Lavandula angustifolia.”

She crosses her arms across her chest and smirks. She raises her eyebrow in a silent challenge, wondering if he’ll take it. He sits up straighter and raises his chin and squints his eyes. “Rosemary.”

She scoffs. “Rosmarinus officinalis.”

He gets up out of his chair. “Peppermint”

“Mentha × piperita”

He steps closer to her. “Bay Laurel”

“Laurus nobilis”

He takes another step closer, his long legs carrying him closer to her, closing the distance between them. He’s close enough for her to reach out and touch his face if she wanted to.He looks down at her, a smirk on his face. She looks up at him and oh. She loses her breath. His eyes are tired but alive, the light above her making it look like sparks exploding in them. His unbelievably long eyelashes create a light shadow across his cheekbones and her hand itches to reach out and touch them. She wants to be close enough to count every eyelash. She wants to kiss every mole on his face. She wants to trace the shape of his lips with her own. She wants… she wants.

The air around them grows heavy and Lydia feels her breaths getting heavier. His eyes are hooded and he doesn’t seem to notice that how close he is or how his proximity is affecting her. She bits her lip, eyes not leaving his face, the situation seeming strangely erotic. He licks his lips as he opens his mouth to speak and she feels a tug in her stomach at the sight of his wet lips.

“Oregano” The word knocks her back to reality and away from daydreams She shakes her head and raises her eyebrow at his question.

“Origanum vulgare” He stares at her and she mentally wills him to look away because if he keeps looking at her like that she gonna do something that is gonna be really hard to explain to Allison. The spell is broken though when he laughs, stepping back a few paces to look at her.

“God, is there anything you don’t know?” He smiles and looks at her with wonder that makes her heart skip beats.

She smiles in return. “Probably not.” (I don't know why I want to kiss you so bad)

He looks down at his feet and raises his eyes at her, making her chest tighten. His voice is raspy when he answers. “ Yeah probably not. You know… you’re really smart. Like scary smart.”  This time its her who steps forward.

“You think I’m scary?” her voice is teasing but a part of her genuinely wants to know. Her uncanny ability to find dead people is probably not a good thing. It's like he reads her mind.

“Not like supernatural scary. But you’re scary in other ways…  when you want to be.” he adds as an afterthought, his eyes on his feet again. She takes another step forward, feet moving without permission.

“Do I scare you?” the words come out as a whisper. His head snaps back up, his cheeks filled with color.

“No.” His words are strong, filled with an emotion she doesn’t wanna face.

Her shoulders drop in relief. “Good.” She gives him a soft smile and their eyes meet. The upcoming dawn seems quiet, the world dead as they stand on the precipice of something immense in the middle of her kitchen. She could jump, all it would take is a few steps and she could grab his face and satisfy her curiosity once and for all. She could get him out of her system, wipe it clean and go back to life like normal. Just another boy, just another face. But it's not that easy. She can’t do anything because this is Stiles. This is Scott’s best friend and she knows the disappointed look he would give her if she just used and discarded his best friend like she had countless boys before him. Not when she knows how he feels. Its obvious and months ago his feelings wouldn’t have mattered. No one's would’ve. But now… Allison would be disappointed and she would let down Scott and Stiles would be… She isn’t sure when she let all these people in but now they all have a piece of her and she can’t risk it. And she’s not so sure that she could put him aside. He’s under her skin and she knows that she’ll be an addict after one taste.

So she doesn’t kiss him. Instead she cleans their cups as he watches. And she doesn’t kiss him as he leaves. Instead she sits at her table and tries to figure out when Stiles Stilinski became this important to her. And she doesn’t kiss him when he shows her his grade a few days later, a bright red A in the corner of his paper. She doesn’t kiss him when he sits down next to her at the library and passes her his math homework, asking her to check his work. She doesn’t kiss him (but God, she really wants to.)

ccvi.

What kind of pants did you wear today? >> Lounge pants, I guess they’re called.

How old is your television? >> I don’t know. A few years old, I assume.

Do you have a laptop or desktop? >> Two laptops.

When did you last talk on the phone with someone? >> I don’t remember.

Are you currently sleepy? >> No.

Do you own any television series box sets? >> I don’t.

Have you ever been in a fight with your best friend? >> I can’t even imagine what would prompt Can Calah and I to ever fight with each other. There’s nothing to fight about.

When did you last receive a hug and who was it from? >> Whenever the last time Sparrow hugged me was.

Was the last movie you watched a horror film? >> It was. (The Void.)

Do you own a lot of tee shirts? >> More than is necessary, certainly.

Do you plan your outfits ahead of time? >> No.

Have you ever spent the night in jail? >> No.

Would you say you’re a bad influence on others? >> That’s not something I know how to determine. I’d imagine my influence varies depending on the influenced.

Do you handle pain well? >> The nature of the pain determines how well I handle it. I’m usually inclined to stoicism in the face of pain, but some kinds of pain override that pretty quickly.

Have you ever been so nervous you threw up? >> No. I can’t even comprehend that.

Where is your favorite place to go when you’re depressed? >> To bed.

In high school, were you in trouble a lot? >> I wasn’t in trouble a lot, but I was in the guidance counsellor’s office more often than I’d have liked to be.

Do you enjoy your hairstyle? >> Meh. It needs to be cut again.

Do you have long hair or short hair? >> Quite short.

How much make up do you wear on a daily basis? >> None.

Do you have a leather jacket? >> I have a mock-leather jacket.

Do you have weak upper body strength? >> Somewhat, yeah. I was stronger when I was transient and had to carry my life on my back.

Do you think hugs are awkward? >> “Awkward” isn’t the word I think of, no.

Do you think facial hair is gross? >> It’s gross when it is unkempt and unwashed.

Would you ever dye your hair an unnatural color? >> Sure.

What color was the last cup you drank from? >> Black. It has Captain Phasma on it.

Have you ever been to the zoo before? >> Yes.

What instruments do you know how to play? >> None.

How late did you stay up last night? >> Not too late. I think I went to bed between midnight and 1a EST.

How late do you plan on staying up tonight? >> I have no idea. I don’t think about it too much; I just go to bed when I feel ready to do so.

Have you ever done hard drugs before? >> A few.

Has anyone ever been weirdly obsessed with you? >> I don’t know. If so, I didn’t notice (or find it weird).

Do you own a Snuggie? >> I don’t.

What is your favorite band of all time? >> I suppose the best candidate for that role is Pearl Jam, considering how long and how consistently I’ve loved them.

Would you consider getting a tattoo any time soon? >> Of course. If I had the money for one.

Are there any paintings on your wall? >> No paintings, no.

What movie did you last watch with someone? >> The Dark Tower.

Are you afraid of airplane rides? >> Not at all. I love flying.

What do you think is the best smell in the world? >> I can’t possibly determine that.

If you’re reading a book, what page are you currently on? >> I don’t feel like getting up to find out, but I’m about 85% done with We Need To Talk About Kevin.

Do you think people are intimidated by you? >> I’ve been told as much by a variety of people over time.

Do you have a job you like? >> ---

Have you ever lived with a roommate before? >> I’ve only not lived with roommates once in my life, and I was too depressed to enjoy it.

Do you like candles? >> I sure do. I’m very specific about scents, though.

What is something you lose often? >> Lip balm. But I usually find it eventually.

What will you be doing in the next ten minutes? >> Still working on this survey, most likely.

How many scarves do you own, if any at all? >> Three or four, I think.

Where did you last sleep? >> In bed.

Do you have Netflix? >> Yes.

Do you enjoy dancing? >> I sure do.

Do you ever go shopping with your parents (not including grocery shopping)? >> Not since I left my parent’s home.

Have you ever had some kind of sleep-disorder? How did it affect your life? >> No.

Have you ever had food poisoning before? Describe the experience. >> I’ve had it twice. What’s to describe, other than the distinct impression that one is constantly and inconclusively expelling their entire bodily mass from both ends of their gastrointestinal tract...?

Have you ever read anything by Chuck Palahniuk? What did you think? >> I read Haunted, and one other, I think. It was a long time ago, so not only have I forgotten what I thought, it is probably different than what I’d think if I were to read them again now.

How do you tend to amuse yourself on long car journeys? >> Reading, thinking, looking out of the window, napping, or listening to music or podcasts.

Do you find that caffeinated or alcoholic drinks make you pee more than normal? >> No. If I do pee more than normal while drinking, it’s because I’m consuming more liquid in a short period of time than I normally would be. Simplest of cause/effect relationships.

How often do you need to charge your phone and iPod (on average)? >> Once a day, or once every other day.

Do you still enjoy watching Disney movies? >> Almost all of the Disney movies I’ve seen were as an adult, so.

What are some interests you have in common with your parents? >> My father is creative in a DIY sort of way, and I share that interest. He also enjoys history, as do I (although our specific historical interests differ). We both like to explore, and take different paths (in more ways than one).

How old were you when your parents trusted you to stay home alone all day? >> I don’t think I’ve ever had that privilege in my entire time under his roof.

If you could go to one country for two weeks, all expenses paid, where would you go and why? >> Iceland. Why not?

Do you drink more or less water than is recommended? >> I don’t put any stock in the “recommended” amount of daily water intake. I drink as much as I care to, and don’t worry too much about it.

Do you like taking walks? >> Sometimes.

What do your parents think about piercings and tattoos? Do you agree with them? >> My father doesn’t care for tattoos or piercings anywhere but the ears. I obviously do not share this distaste in the slightest.

What are your religious beliefs? Are these the same as your parents’? >> My father and I are both independent and syncretic seekers.

Do you find it difficult to get to sleep early when you have to be up for something the next day? >> In general, I find it difficult to force sleep when I am not sleepy, yeah.

Who has more influence over your taste in music - friends or family? >> Er...

Do you crave alone time, or are you someone who loves being around other people a lot? >> I require a substantial amount of alone time; if that is given, then I find that I am definitely more willing to socialise with others when the opportunity arises.

Are you one of those people who texts back instantly >> Yes.

Assuming money wasn’t an issue, what car would buy right now, given the chance? >> Anything by Tesla Motors.

Do you think going to college/university is the best option after you’ve left school? >> For some students, I’m sure it is. Not for every student.

Is it easy to sleep late in your house, or are other people pretty noisy in the mornings? >> Sparrow works nights, so it’s definitely quiet in the mornings, since she’s asleep.

Do you prefer watching movies alone or with other people? >> I usually watch movies alone, but they can be fun with others as well. It really depends on the company, their movie-watching habits, and the movie itself.

What are two things that you have no problem paying full price for? >> Considering “full price” doesn’t always suggest quality in this country, I’m always skeptical about paying full price for anything.

You have 5 minutes - grab 3 snacks from the grocery store. What are they >> That would obviously depend on what grocery store I’m in.

Dancing, acting, and singing - which two are you best at? >> Singing, then dancing.

Deep fried Oreos & deep fried pickles - would you try either? >> Hell no. I’d rather starve.

Do you remember how old you were when you found out where babies come from? >> I don’t remember. I read books about that sort of thing rather early, because I was curious.

Funny, charming, cute, romantic, smart - choose only 2 for the opposite sex. >> Smart and funny. Those two things secured, other desirable traits tend to come along for the ride.

Snow or sand? Soda or juice? Cake or cookies? Royalty or immortality? >> Snow. Juice. Eugh. Immortality.

Which is more important to you: make-up or hair? >> Er... important in what sense...?

For an entire month would you rather have a unibrow or no eyebrows at all? >> I really don’t care.

What is one tradition that you and your family have? Do you enjoy it? >> ---

Have you ever let somebody use you? Why did you do it? >> I don’t know. Maybe. I’m not 100% clear on what “being used” looks or feels like.

You can go back in time & change something in your Mom’s past - what is it? >> ---

Do you know anybody who is around the exact same size as you? Who? >> I mean, probably. I don’t know the sizes of everyone I know.

Ever been to a haunted house? How scared were you? >> Yes! I wasn’t scared because that’s not the sort of thing I’d be frightened by, but it was very fun and engaging.

Money doesn’t matter - choose a vacation destination and pick your party: >> Yawn.

Who is the last person you talked badly about behind their back? >> Sigma, probably, in venting.

Been on any websites today you wouldn’t want your parents to see? >> I don’t care what he sees. We’re both adults.

Flip your arm over - can you see your veins? >> I usually can’t see my veins, except for the one that pops up in the crook of my right elbow. A phlebotomist’s answered prayer, that one.

Pick a movie at least 5 years old that you absolutely love: >> Uh... Event Horizon.

Apparently, you can’t tickle yourself. Do you think that’s true? >> I have no reason not to accept it as truth.

Do you ever buy snacks at the movie theater? What do you get? >> No.

When was the last time you had to jump? >> I don’t remember.

At what time does it start getting dark where you live? >> At this time of year, sunset is around quarter to nine.

Which is worse: dusting or mopping? >> Worse, meaning...?

Peanut butter VS. Caramel - which side are you on? I like peanut butter but I largely dislike caramel.

Have you ever complained to a manager about anything? What was it? >> I haven’t been in that position that I can remember, no.

Any idea where the shirt you’re wearing was made? Take a guess. >> I’m going to guess China.

Would you marry somebody who was intensely religious? >> It depends in which way they were intensely religious. I would not marry a fundamentalist of any religion, or anyone with strict legalist ideas. But passion is perfectly acceptable.

Part Two

Sorry, I’m bad at titles because I’m still trying to get a feel for how I want this whole project to be.

To be honest, I don’t feel as compelled to write about my mom as I did yesterday. Perhaps writing that long post yesterday was some sort of release for me so that I don’t feel as pressured anymore. Regardless, I had really wanted to make this a daily post kind of thing. But I might change that plan. I might just save this blog for only times that I feel really compelled to share feelings or thoughts about my mom or this whole situation.

I honestly just want to spend more time with her right now and watch a horror movie with her because it’s October/Halloween time. We might watch the Exorcist. So I want to make sure I post today at all so it’s not on my mind while I’m spending time with her. Maybe the format I’ll start with is just a preface of how our day went to let you know where my mind is at least, with each and every blog post, give you guys some context. And then I’ll move on to a couple or a few topics about my mom or this whole process.

So today I want to touch on her childhood, I don’t know how far I’ll go, and I only know so much anyway. Maybe I should ask her about it more. It’s sad that that’s not something we think to do with our parents as a normal thing, kind of like how families don’t sit and eat together anymore. Or maybe that’s just my family. And then maybe I was going to get into what it was like being raised by her, but now that sounds like a lot for only the second and one post. But first I’ll start with our day.

My mom got up really early. I can never tell when she’s going to wake up. Sometimes she sleeps in when she’s sore or doesn’t feel good and sometimes she’s up bright and early at the crack of dawn. Today was one of the ‘crack of dawn’ days. Myself, I kept waking up throughout the night as I’m usually prone to do. Maybe having some black tea earlier in the day didn’t help. I tried to wake up early with her, but I just didn’t feel up to it, so I slept in more. I actually had such a great day yesterday, perhaps that’s why I was so inspired to write about her, that I actually had skipped my evening medication and I thought I was alright, feeling fine. But today, I actually woke up feeling odd, with an uncommon sense of anxiety, a great deal of it I wasn’t used to lately. So I suspected skipping the medication was a big mistake. Even though I was uncomfortable and bothered, I wasn’t worried. I took my morning dose of the day and eventually it kicked in and my day started to turn around.

I pushed myself to go with her to the grocery store so I could help her lift all the groceries so she didn’t have to stress her body at all. My anxiety was high there and the place was unusually crowded for midday Monday, or maybe I was just sensitive to everything. She dropped me off with the groceries and decided to make one quick stop on her own to pick up the remaining supplies. I waited to start feeling better and eventually when I did, I started to clean the house for her as she did things in the kitchen as she usually does. I should add my mom is adorably obsessed with keeping the kitchen spotless and clean. And after my workout, we made sloppy joe’s together just now. And that’s been our day. The weather’s been ugly and I suspect that has a lot to do with how our day has gone.

As far her childhood. Well my mom is the second youngest of eight children. 6 girls and 2 boys. From what I’m told my grandma lived very poor, even when raising these children. But from what I understand, a lot of parents from my generation grew up this way. It must have been such a different time. So many families had so many kids in one family, whereas nowadays couples aren’t having that many kids. Must have been such a different time.

I should probably learn more about how she was growing up. I know she was close with both her brothers. She was also close with the youngest sister of them all, my aunt Annabelle. 

If I’m being honest, I don’t think my mom performed the best in school, but that never mattered to me because she has one of the biggest hearts I know of from a person. She’s showered me with plenty of love, which I’ll elaborate on some other time, more than I could ever ask for. All of my different friends throughout my childhood would constantly remark at how nice and understanding my mom was, how generous and giving she was. And also how great her home cooking was. I am quite blessed to have a talented home chef as a mom. Just now thinking and mentioning that has me emotional about the fact that I might lose that forever. I would miss her cooking so much. There’s nothing quite like it to me. But she’s taught me as much as she can in the kitchen, I just have to keep at it as with anything.

I’m not sure at what age exactly she meant my father. You’ll have to forgive me that it’s hard to talk about my father since we haven’t had the best relationship for many many years, there is no relationship rather with him. But I know she was very young. She became pregnant with my one and only older brother at the age of 18 or 19. My dad was much older than her, there’s a 10 year age gap between the two of them, but that’s not really shocking as girls are typically attracted to the wisdom and confidence of older men, among other things like security. 

They both worked in retail and I’m sure that’s how they met. Oddly enough that’s exactly how my mom met my stepdad as well. Just the way things go I guess. Personally I can’t date someone I work with, that’s never worked out. 

I guess I’m getting ahead of myself and should make sure I cover her childhood. I’ve heard constant stories of how stern and aggressive my grandfather was to my mom and all my aunts and uncles. I would probably scare you with the stories I’ve heard with how we would punish them severely. But then again, I always hear this from parents of kids from my generation, that it was so much harder and disciplined when they were growing up. It’s almost like our parents were scarred from the brute force style of raising children back in the day that they compensated by being so nice and kind to us, spoiling us, and that’s what makes us so different from other generations and is partly why we have some of the problems we have, like living in our parents’ house abnormally longer than generations previous. 

It’s funny, it’s a lot easier for me to write about our day today than to reflect and analyze her childhood. Maybe that goes to show you I don’t know much about it. That sounds kind of sad but I really don’t mean for it to be that way. I should probably ask her about it to make this project more accurate and detailed. 

But I think I touched on all the important parts to give you guys at least an idea. She was in a large poor family of 8, 10 including my grandma and grandpa. Eventually my grandparents separated, but never divorced and my grandpa moved back to Mexico, even though he was a U.S. citizen which is how my Mexican grandma gained citizenship. My grandfather was very brutal in raising all of them from what I can tell or have been told. She wasn’t the best in school, but she managed. She met my dad at the young age and got pregnant so that stopped all her education pretty much. I’m sure she had a fair amount of boyfriends growing up. People have told me she’s a very beautiful woman. But then again, with how strict my grandparents were, you never know.

And that’s most of it, or the big things. Maybe next time I’ll just tell you more about her, like the things she likes to do, maybe some experiences we’ve shared together, I don’t know.

I sure hope I’m in the mood to write more tomorrow. At the very least I hope I wake up early enough to have a longer day to give myself more of a chance at falling into the mood to write a lot at some point. But I’ll end this for now. Thank you for your time as always. Have a pleasant evening.