irene-with-a-gaze - Tumblr blog

irene-with-a-gaze · 1 year

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jaw dropping

WAYS TO SAY I LOVE YOU #5 ★ masterlist.

pairing: levi x reader

genre: royal guard au | warnings: mature language, fantasy worlds, violence, blood, character death, battle violence, decapitation, game of thrones inspired violence | wc: 3.4k

note: one of my fave works ever :')

⏤ Imagine the way they say I love you. Imagine the words shouted at top volume, in the middle of an argument, never meant to come out that way.

Growing up, Levi had rarely thought of anybody other than himself. He was selfish, arrogant, cold and standoffish to his friends and family, brooding in his chambers and isolated from children his age. And so, really, he can’t complain about the fact that his father got fed up by his antics and sent him to a facility outside of his village, grooming boys into men, men into Gods who would later serve Lords and Ladies. Levi had never expected to go up in the world, but he did; quite possibly, Levi had the biggest task on hand after his graduation- like every great Kingdom, there was a monarchy. And, as it so happened, their princess was in need of a protector.

He’d been doing that since he was nineteen, standing like a shadow behind the young princess and watching without judgement as she cried, as she obeyed, as she writhed under the stares of suitors and yells from the monarchy behind closed doors. Levi was still selfish, despising the King and Queen and at the same time, needing every moment of his life to be by your side, making sure nobody hurt you or even thought of touching you. Princess Y/N, the only daughter and heir to this Kingdom; his Princess and his life, who he’d do anything for.

Should the city fall, Levi had a conditioned procedure and a network of exits to take, including a well-known passage out of the city towards the Sacred Temple of the Anders, where he had trained meticulously for eight years of his life. Naturally, Levi had never felt the need to practise this with you- this Kingdom was safe and secure, and would never fall under siege.

Of course, now, he curses himself; outside the window, Levi can see turrets of thick grey smoke rising to the sky and glimpses of flames inside shop windows, the screams of the people- by extension, his people- as they fled on foot, on horse, on all fours, escaping the flames and the gunshots and the arrows that were being shot from trees and dugouts, men on horseback.

“Your Grace, it is of paramount importance that we leave right this instant.”

Behind him, Levi can hear the grand maester shouting at you from the door to your keep, his chains clinking nervously as a thud sends bricks from a nearby avenue crashing through the castle walls. He gasps with horror and has the nerve to grab at your arm, as Levi sees when he turns around. Before he can intervene, you yank yourself out of his grasp with a scowl.

“I will leave when I please, and I will leave when Levi says so. If you have anything against my judgement, I would enjoy hearing it at a trial for your head. Now, if you don’t mind,” you huff, finally looking at Levi and as you turn, your expression falls.

There’s no word from the King or Queen, or any other royal council member for that matter. As the world comes crumbling down, there’s only you and him, and the withering old maester who eventually loses nerve, treasonously scoffing in your direction before finally fleeing down the swirling staircase towards, presumably, the next best exit.

Levi follows his body as he leaves before looking back at you, feeling his heart wrench at your fallen expression, eyes filling with tears and skin glassy. He takes several steps forward, because Levi is the only person authorised to be within inches of you without asking beforehand, and takes your forearms in his hands gently.

“Princess, I believe it is time to go,” he says.

“My parents- the King, the Queen-”

“Should have already left, your Grace,” Levi finishes. Your bottom lip quivers with the threat of a cry, and Levi without thinking cups your face with his hands, his thumb smoothing a fallen tear away. “It’s okay. I’ve got you and I’m not going to let a single thing happen to you, okay?”

You nod around a sniffle, gently stepping away and placing your crown down onto the bed, on a pillow where you hope it will remain. If not, somebody else can wear it with pleasure; if there’s a chance your family are alive, they might even look for you once this is all over. Otherwise…

You look back at Levi, whilst he’s busy taking another glance out of the window as if analysing the outside damage. Levi was undeniably one of the strongest, bravest and most selfless people you thought you had ever met. He put you before anything, even if it meant danger for himself, and absolutely anybody in the world would be lucky to have him in their service. While he stares away, you catch your breath and slip your hand into his, wanting the safety of his touch, his presence, to physically feel him there with you.

When your hand slots into his, Levi snaps his head away from the damage and stares at them, intertwined. He sniffs and inhales the smell of dust and brings your hand to his mouth, kissing your knuckles and finally looking at you with a scared, yet composed breath of air: “Okay. Stay as close to me as you can, okay?”

“Yes,” you reply quietly, immediately doing as he says and gluing yourself to his body. He welcomes it, embracing it, as he hurriedly begins a descent down the staircase and onwards with his pre-planned escape route.

It’s simple, and easy to navigate, made up of stairways and corridors that only he knows about, lefts and rights down walkways that hadn’t been dusted in years. With every grumble of damage above your head, you whimper, following Levi further down the castle before finally reaching the dungeon doors. It could be easy for Levi, if he were the type, to kill you in here, or hand you over to the invaders as a welcome present, but he doesn’t; he pushes the door open and pulls you inside, setting off towards the back entrance that just occurs to you is open and untouched, revealing out towards the back of the castle near the creek, and the open passage you both used on evenings to explore the city and the fields, catch frogs in the spring in the pools, watch fireflies and lanterns on summer evenings.

Levi has you halfway down the corridor when suddenly he pushes you into an alcove, the sound of spraying bullets echoing in the corridor. A torn cry of horror leaves your throat as Levi pushes his weight onto you and against the wall in a crouch. A series of voices in a foreign dialect laugh from further by the exit, footsteps slowly moving forward. They think they’ve got a hit.

“Are you hit? Are you hurt?” Levi asks hurriedly, his hands searching for injuries he won’t forgive himself for.

“No, no. Are you?” you reply and he shakes his head quickly, sighing with premature relief. “Levi-”

“I am going to go out there and I’m going to clear the way for us,” he explains, and the plan sounds diabolical and you shake your head as he speaks, “and when I say so, you will run down that corridor and outside. If I’m not behind you, then you must go without me. Go as far as you can, past the forest like we used to, towards the windmill and the lonely tree.”

“Levi-”

“There will be someone there for you,” Levi continues breathlessly, “and they will take you someplace safe, okay? Promise me, please. Promise me you will do as I say.”

You gape at him as he tries to hand you something in his fist. “What? No, absolutely not, I will not leave you behind! Who do you think I am?”

“You are the Princess and your safety is my number one concern.”

“Yes, I am the Princess, and I command you to stay by my side,” you stress indignantly. “I am not leaving here without you.”

Levi’s face darkens with frustration, the item in his hand now forced into yours. You realise that it is a necklace- his necklace, with his family ring attached like a pendant, the chain slightly dirty and skinny. As tears pool in your eyes, you glare at him.

“Don’t be so stupid,” Levi snaps. “Don’t you dare put my life before yours.”

“But you can put mine before yours?”

“That is my job!” Levi replies. The footsteps are approaching closer, hurried and searching. “Just do as I say!”

“No, I can’t-I can’t leave you, Levi.”

“You hold no obligation to save my life,” Levi points out. “So, why?”

“Because,” you cry out. “Because I love you, Levi! That’s why!”

The words come out without you wanting them to, and you can’t undo it; Levi hears it over the crashes of explosions above you and he’s rendered speechless, his eyes looking at every feature of your face with an unreadable expression. He looks pained, heartbroken, his head tilting up with a forced, “fuck,” and he blinks rapidly, to stop his eyes from filling up.

“Why,” he says quietly, looking back at you; his eyebrows are pinched, his face in agony, “why now? Why would you say that now?”

“I’m sorry, I don’t know if I’ll get to say it again,” you admit, and after you say them, Levi looks like he’s actually about to cry when he pulls your face towards his, capturing your lips in a firm and deep kiss. It’s short, because it has to be, and he holds your face for a little longer before sighing shakily and pulling away. “Levi- please-”

“I’ll be right back,” he promises, nodding as he speaks. He reaches for his sword- he knows how to use it around the hunting rifles, because they’re slow to reload, and heavy, and he’s not. “You know what to do. Okay? Hm? Yeah, okay?”

You force yourself to nod: “Okay.”

Levi doesn’t want to leave, but he knows that above anything else he wants in the world, he wants you to be able to live, and rest at the end of the day. Granting himself another few seconds to look at you and memorise your face, he smiles around his pain and turns into the hallway. Immediately as he steps out, hellfire; you clench your eyes closed and cover your ears with your hands, struggling to breathe around heavy sobs. From your mouth leaves frantic cries to God, asking him that if he’s there and if he loves you, will he save the one you need to keep living?

A few moments pass, and as you bury your head between your knees, a cold hand on your head makes you shoot up with alarm. Spotting Levi’s face in the blur of your tears makes you cry more, not at first recognising the wound in his leg, the blood pouring down his skin and his trousers torn around the knees. Levi says something- you can see his lips moving but nothing is coming out; he forces you up off the floor and holds you close to him as he limps back out into the corridor. As he hurries you down, you trip over the extended hands of bodies Levi has slain, their faces forever remembered as the ones who tried to take him away from you.

The sunshine of the creek is what you can see, and it occurs to you that Levi has smuggled you out. As expected, by the apple tree by the fountain is the white horse Levi raised from a foal, his mane matted and slightly bloody. He whinnies as Levi clambers forward, and before he raises himself up onto his back, he helps you up, a hand on your legs as he lifts you with a quiet grunt. He doesn’t have much time- the sound of battle cries back towards the castle indicates that more rebels have seen the slaughter, and they know you’ve escaped.

Levi untangles his horse’s reins from the tree branch and heaves himself up; you're sitting in his lap, essentially, unsafely with your body facing his and legs swung around his waist. He does this for his own selfish needs to keep you safe, his arms around you to cage you in so you don’t fall. Wasting no time, Levi rattles the reigns and the horse gallops towards the entry.

For a few minutes, he thinks he’s safe.

Your head is on his shoulder, your ragged gasps of air in his ear and blowing on his neck. Levi just wants to cry- he wants to cry so badly and loudly, and lift you up in his arms and tell you that he loves you and that he’d do anything for you. Those three words are on his tongue ready to be spilled when the crack of a whip sends a shudder down his spine. Over his shoulder, you squeak with fear as a herd of rebels emerges from down the street, blobs that slowly gain shape as they hurry towards you with haste.

The scenery is a green and brown blur, the smoke from your kingdom clustering in the sky and filling the air with a choking and overwhelming smell of ash and fire. That same fire catches to the trees, flames spreading like water spilling and the wildlife protected by your family name scurry away to safety, deer on the road next to you, a squirrel catching a ride on the back of a wild wolf that pays no mind to Levi and his horse. It’s a game of life or death.

Further down the narrow path, Levi sees them; he sees the group of Anders boys standing around the lonely tree on top of the passing hill, where the end of the kingdom stands. He can make out three, on horseback and he doesn’t let himself get too excited- instead he sends his horse rushing towards them. Behind the three, there was more, he could see heads bobbing like fishing boats as the horse settled on the grass. Anders could help them- Anders could get rid of the rebels behind you.

Around his waist, Levi feels you shuffle, your hands creeping up his back between his shoulder blades as you sit back to look at his face. He trusts his horse and looks at you with faith.

“We’re almost there,” he promises, his eyes looking deep into yours as they flicker to the rebels and back to them: “Don’t look at them, baby, look at me, okay? Look at me, Y/N.”

You do, focusing in on his gaze.

“I love you so much,” Levi says, his composure slipping. “I love you.”

“I know,” you reply softly. His horse gallops faster, nearing the hill. The grass is right ahead, “I know. I love you too-”

A horrified scream leaves Levi’s throat as the rebels send out their arrows; one flies through the back leg of his horse and the other shoots straight through your skull, a circle of red around the middle of your eyes as the arrow hits your brain and kills you instantly. As his horse falls, so do you; everything goes tumbling to the twigs and gravel in a matter of seconds and Levi cannot breathe.

Anders move from the hill downwards but he’s not even looking. Levi feels his whole body shaking and his heart hammering in his chest, bile in his throat; your head is split open with crimson, the blood shining in the sun and Levi cries out loud, shouting to the skies as he frantically holds your head with his hands, feeling his body go rigid with tremors as he inhales the smell of your skull, his hands covered with it. This was his fault- he had told you not to look; if you’d have looked, you could have seen them raising their arrows, he could have taken cover - he could have saved you.

Levi is not the only person paralysed; the shooter freezes on his horse. He wasn’t supposed to hit you. He was aiming for Levi, but his horse had jolted and he let go too soon; without you, there was no chance the other kingdoms would accept their King on the throne. He pulls his horse back, trying to flee, but Mike from Anders slices the leg of his horse off, watching the stallion move to the floor with pain and Mike ends its suffering before it can truly suffer, thrusting his sword into the chest of the shooter without a word.

Levi sits.

Even when Erwin, another man from Anders, comes up behind him with his hands on his shoulders, trying to force him back, he doesn’t budge. He can barely hear Erwin screaming at him to move, everything feels like he’s underwater. When Erwin removes his hand quickly and Levi feels the floor vibrating beneath his knees, Levi looks up. Anders have tucked their tails and left, Mike now on his horse and retreating back to the tree. The rebels can’t touch them there- they’re on sacred ground.

In his head, flashing images of your smile replay, the static in his ears. This was his fault. This was all his fault.

Quietly, Levi whispers I’m sorry, his lips on your hands as he gently sets you down on the floor. Mike rides up to him, stopping for one moment and looking at him silently. Nothing is said but he knows what to do, he knows what Levi wants.

In less than three seconds, Mike jumps off his horse and gathers you in his arms, mounting the horse once more and riding towards the plains. If Levi’s lucky, they might get his body too.

Rising to his feet, Levi feels a wave of anger washing over him; his body vibrates with hostility and his face is darkened with pain and sorrow and guilt. As the rebels surge towards him, singing battle cries, Levi unsheathes his sword and stands his ground, feeling the energy from the earth ride through his body. All he can think about is you- his Y/N, his Princess, his meaning and will to live.

And they’ve taken that away from him.

Levi fights for your honour until he feels the clean blade of a sword on his neck. When the blade cuts and slices Levi’s head off his neck and shoulders, Mike’s horse bristles and he turns away unexpectedly, bringing you closer to his chest and retreating down the plain and back towards the Temple of Anders.

If Erwin wanted, he and his men could shoot those rebels, who laugh and cheer tauntingly as they drag Levi’s body up and pull it towards one of their horses. On the side, in a sack on one of the stallions, Erwin spots the tufts of fur from a wolf from the sacred forests, blood dripping from the sawn-off head like a tap. The foreign rebels are famous for what they’ll do next, and what they’ll show to celebrate the death of the monarchy- the irony of a sacred creature sewn onto a sacred guard to the sacred monarchy.

Erwin turns away. What’s done is done, and the only thing he can do now, is save himself.

#levi ackerman #levi x reader #levi ackerman x reader #levi imagine #levi scenario #levi angst #captain levi #levi ackerman imagine #attack on titan #aot angst #aot #royal guard levi #game of thrones x aot #game of thrones au #dark angst

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irene-with-a-gaze · 1 year

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hermione - theo

an unlikely pair I must admit, although not as strange as some other ones we’ve seen before:

1. noticing you Rating: G/ Status: One shot

2. notes on her pillow Rating: G/ Status: One shot

3. a dangerous way to live Rating: T/ Status: One shot

4. an experiment gone awry Rating: G/ Status: One shot

5. daughter of the house of black Rating: T

6. silly muggle pseudoscience Rating: T/ Status: One shot

7. sine nomine Rating: G/ Status: Ongoing

8. the golden girl Rating: T/ Status: Ongoing

9. there is no remedy for love Rating: G/ Status: One shot

10. till forever falls apart Status: Ongoing

11. unlovable Rating: T/ Status: Ongoing

#Harry Potter #Hermione Granger #theodore nott #theo nott #theomione #fanfiction #hp #hp imagine #hp fanfic #hp fanfiction #hp fanart #fanart #fanfic

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irene-with-a-gaze · 1 year

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little talks, dangerous talks, innocent talks, vindicated talks between two...

now we're torn, torn, torn apart

there's nothing we can do

just let me go, we'll meet again soon

(now wait, wait, wait for me

please hang around

i'll see you when i fall asleep)

#dramione #hermione x draco #hp fanfic #hp #hp ships #hp imagine #harry potter #hermione granger #draco malfoy #dramione fanart #fanart #fanfiction #fanfic #ron weasley #draco x hermione #little talks #of monsters and men #omam

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irene-with-a-gaze · 1 year

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aot characters as ts songs

some of these are responses to certain headcannons or ships, or what could've beens.

...should i make fanfics out of these?

Eren:

anti-hero

mastermind

dear reader

exile

seven

peace

don't blame me

Mikasa:

lavender haze

you're on your own, kid

midnight rain

would've, could've, should've

nothing new

begin again

the last time

right where you left me

long story short

tolerate it

cardigan

hoax

the archer

i wish you would

clean

Armin:

snow on the beach

sweet nothing

tis the damn season

death by a thousand cuts

afterglow

long live

safe & sound

Jean:

question...?

high infidelity

sad beautiful tragic

gold rush

the 1

august

betty

Annie:

vigilante shit

right where you left me

invisible string

mad women

out of the woods

Levi:

the great war

cowboy like me

evermore

ivy

my tears ricochet

epiphany

daylight

innocent

eyes open

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irene-with-a-gaze · 1 year

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The Great War ft. Attack on Titan

"We can plant a memory garden Say a solemn prayer, place a poppy in my hair There's no morning glory, it was war, it wasn't fair"

@ credit to the marvelous artists

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irene-with-a-gaze · 1 year

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"You have the freedom to defend the world's freedom, and I have the freedom to continue moving forward"- Eren Yeager

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irene-with-a-gaze · 1 year

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Laurie x Jo Fanfictions

i feel as though we are a minority, us Laurie and Jo shippers:

1. on the edge of forever Rating: T/ Status: One shot

where Jo and Laurie get married.

2. if you take this heart of mine, it will be yours Status: Ongoing

a reconciliation.

3. i won’t be late for this Rating: T/ Status: Unfinished/Ongoing

an uncovered letter.

4. but tell it slant Rating: T/ Status: One shot

high infidelity.

5. i had the time of my life with you Rating: T/ Status: One shot

france, and the french.

6. platonic regrets Rating: T/ Status: One shot

our requited, unrequited loves.

7. renewal Rating: T/ Status: Unfinished/Ongoing

she brought me back to life.

8. souls too entwined to find peace Status: One shot

two souls and the heart is wee and bitter.

9. the spoken things (and the ones that can still be shouted) Rating: G/ Status: One shot

and the things that should be.

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irene-with-a-gaze · 2 years

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The pretty lights, one: shirbert series one

She said, "I was seven and you were nine"

I looked at you like the stars that shine

In the sky, the pretty lights

-taylor swift, mary's song

A whistle, low and as if meant to be whispered, meant for only one's ears, floated through the orchard. It's owner grinned, sly eyes going up and down as he surveyed the tree before him, and the little figure hidden within its extensive branches.

The figure gasped lowly, and tried-- not so subtly-- to move out of his view. The boy, nine, chuckled as he stepped forward slowly, "I wonder where... carrots is," he bellowed, stepping aside as soon as an apple was-- surely-- thrown in his direction, whether it by accident or intentionally meant to hurt him (he'd go with the latter). "How lovely, an apple just for me. De-licious. Thank you, tree, for your welcoming gif-- ouch!"

A sniffle was heard, another apple had fallen, this time directly onto his head.

"That's it," he murmured, rolling his eyes at his friend's childish behavior. After all, he was much wiser than her. By two whole years! And Christopher Columbus, what a whole lot a difference it made, those two years.

Gilbert fastened the bag of treasure he had with him (chocolates! just for her!) to his belt, and with ease proceeded to climb the tree before him. He'd gotten to where he needed to be without alerting her, as Anne had jumped and almost hit head on the branch above after he, swiftly, plopped himself beside her.

Anne quickly turned her head so he wouldn't see, but he caught the persistent tear which slid down her face, and saw the reddened nose he had gotten so used to seeing growing up beside her.

He, gently (as he had learned from his mistakes) tugged at the end of her braid, hair becoming a fiery halo around her small face, to get her attention. "Anne..."

...

"Anne-girl"

...

"I got you some buried treasure..." Anne somewhat perked up at this, although her face was still buried in the log of the tree. "Well, it was technically buried far into the cabinet, but its definitely something you'll love..."

A sniffle.

"No?" Gilbert sighed, unfastening his bags of goods, pulling a piece of chocolate out, "Alright, guess I'll have to just eat the chocolate myself.

And before he could devour the goodness held in his hand, it was swiped faster than he could scream a no, and stuffed into the face of the red nosed girl, who grinned apprehensively as she swallowed what she had stolen.

Gilbert was not impressed, but the look in her eyes quickly fixed that.

"So... wanna talk about it?"

"...erm, it's just stupid Josie," she murmured.

"What'd she do now...?"

The sky quickly darkened, little lights filled up the sky, twinkling every now and then, something which caused a smile to light up Anne's face, as she recounted her tales of trouble to her older, and much wiser friend.

Gilbert, at some point, had stopped listening. The only thing on that little boy's mind, all who he could think of was... well you know who.

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irene-with-a-gaze · 2 years

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Jo and Laurie

for those of us hopeless romantics who'd hoped they'd end up together:

#little woman 2019 #gifs #jo x laurie #romantic #laurie laurence #little women #jo march #meg march #timothee chalamet #little woman movie #tchalamet #louisa may alcott #books #literature #couples #saorise ronan #laurie x jo

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irene-with-a-gaze · 2 years

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Hello how are you? can i ask you for an imagine or headcanons please with Aizawa (and Hawks if you don't mind) where his girlfriend Y/N who is a pro hero (top 10 and with a strong quirk) got in the way during the fight with Stain and the students of UA and was found injured

A/N: You got it! Some details might be different/omitted from what obviously happened in the manga/anime but all in the name of fanfiction! Also, Y/n's quirk is inspired by Spiderman as I binge-watched it last night, enjoy!

❣ You would never let these kids fight by themselves, so you position yourself in from them. ❣ You would never admit that of course, but you had gotten cocky, a trait Aizawa often warned you of despite being notoriously known for your strong quirk. ❣ You reacted quickly to each attack, eager to protect these kids as they shouldn't have even been caught in such a fight, but weren't too careful with one of your webs that was now caught by Stain, which sent you plummeting to the ground several times ❣ By the time he was done, the concrete was practically nonexistent ❣ By the end of the fight, you were severely struggling to breathe. ❣ Aizawa wasn't informed of this until the next morning on the phone. He was infuriated, enraged, disturbed. Terrified, most of all. He knew you were alive, but how badly have you gotten injured? How was he so careless to dismiss the fact that you hadn't replied to his messages the night before? ❣ But when he'd opened the door to your room in the hospital, all anger melted away. He just about fainted with the number of wires attached and the white wraps all around your body. ❣ Tripping over every single gift that was left on the floor (you sure got a lot of fans, and somehow they all knew of your injury before him, something he cursed himself over in his mind repeatedly) he finally made it to your bed just as you opened your eyes. ❣ With a painful sigh, you uttered softly, "I'm sorry…" ❣ And that was all it took for his face to collapse into uncharacteristic sorrow and for you to pull him into an embrace, as much as you were allowed to by the number of bandages, for a long, long while.

❣ Hawks knew something was very, very wrong. ❣ Not just because his longtime girlfriend of three years still hadn't shown up to their planned date, but also because a heavy feeling pressed uncomfortably against his chest. ❣ And when a few hours passed and you hadn't answered the phone or his messages, he leaped out of the restaurant (frightening half its guests) and into the darkly lit sky. ❣ Your apartment, his apartment, called your parents, nothing. By now he felt an immense amount of panic swelling within his chest. ❣ That is until he got an alert of the fight, and boy was it gruesome. ❣ Just as he arrived on the scene, his eyes spotted you, your body mangled on the floor, gashes on your skin, and blood on the destroyed concrete beneath you. ❣ Safe to say he was an emotional mess, shaking your shoulders, calling out your name, tear drops falling onto your exposed skin. ❣ The siren of the ambulance snapped him out of his state, slapping some sense into him. ❣ He waited outside the emergency room for hours, eyes glued to the tiled floors beneath until a nurse coaxed him to drink some coffee. ❣ When they'd released you to a room you could rest in, he was quick to situate himself on a chair right next to your bed until you had woken up. ❣ And when you finally opened your eyes, his anguished sobs draw your attention right to him, curling your pinky around his to assure him that you're alright.

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irene-with-a-gaze · 2 years

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Hiyaa!! Mind if you write a Bakugou x fem! reader angst loosely based on tolerate it by taylor swift? extra points if she ends up leaving him at the end!!!

Pairing: Bakugou x fem! reader

Genre: Angst

A/N: ahaha! angst! taylor swift! you got it! who would ever resist such a mix?

I sit and watch you reading with your head low

I notice the light rust on the golden plated number on the door before I fumble with the keys until I manage to insert them in, turning the knob with only a sneeze on my part to announce my presence.

The apartment is relatively lit, with geometric shapes acting as a light source. As I round the corner, dark corners are gaping, including the kitchen and the open door to the laundry room. I shudder despite the warmth that wafts from our upgraded heating system that he had insisted on installing when we first moved in, knocking his knuckles against my forehead, pointing out that I easily get sick. It helped, I suppose, but the warmth displayed now in this harsh winter has recently been overshadowed by the cold presence he exudes.

It’s raining relentlessly, evidence being my hair as it sticks to my brow, although the books and vegetables I had brought in were safely protected inside my coat. I carefully take off my headphones, Sony gleaming off their sides. Slowly I approach our bedroom, and as expected, he’s doing reports, his head hanging to the side, eyebrow furrowed, not looking up even when I clear my throat.

“Hey Katsuki,” I mutter, “when’d you get here?”

I hang my coat on the handle, taking my books to the bookshelf nearby. He takes a minute to reply. “About an hour ago, dinner was shit. Don’t take out from that sushi restaurant again.”

“Oh, well,” I itched the side of my forehead; I thought it was pretty good. “How was work? Any problems?”

“ 'nothin. Just did patrol with Shitty Hair,”

“Ah. Haven't seen Kirishima in a while, why don't you invite him to dinner sometime?” I suggested.

He grunted. Whether in approval or disapproval I couldn't tell.

“I had a good work day today, father said that I should be able to acquire his position within a few months,” I was met with silence on his end. Sighing, I padded to the closet, pulling out a basket of dirty clothes. “He also wanted to talk to you soon. Something about good family investment,”

He looked up, confusion etched on his face, “My career is a good enough investment,”

I hummed, before to turning to ask him, “When did you say that gala was? The uh, award ceremony?”

“Tch, how many times do I have to repeat it? Friday Y/n!”

I sigh, making my way to my vanity. “Right, Friday,” Our fifth anniversary. I thought of reminding him, but he looked pissed off as it is.

______________________________________________________________

“Here, let me do it for you,” I offered, taking the tie from his hand. He said nothing but simply glanced at the watch on his wrist. I mechanically moved as if trained years to do this. And in some sense, it was true. It used to be a way to showcase my affections for him and his to appreciate me wholeheartedly, but now…

“There,” I whispered, fixing his suit although it was perfectly pristine. He hummed, and I thought he was looking at me with something other than a deep annoyance for a split second. But as soon as my eyes met his in a hopeful gaze, he tore away from me.

“Can’t be late, so hurry up.”

______________________________________________________________

I can understand to a certain extent why Katsuki worked so hard for what he became now, the 2nd top hero in all of Japan. The glamorous parties, connections, and sea of beautiful women all dressed in expensive dresses. Amongst them, I felt plain, despite the dress my mother sent me from Italy, rivaling against said gorgeously dressed women.

I held onto Bakugou’s suit-clad arm, carefully constructing my face to a poised, practiced smile I often use during meetings at my father’s trading corporation. He had yet to retire as chairman, and I was content with my position, despite the everyday exchange of fake pleasantries (but it was sometimes the only way to seal the deal).

I arched my back, rolled my shoulders, and held my head as high as possible. As soon as we enter the humongous doors of silver and gold, I take a good glance around. Not only to look for old friends but to manage a few good business deals, a mission assigned by my father. And lucky me, I am met by one approaching from my right. Strike one is the creator of Beez, an up-and-coming video game company. Easy pray and is deemed to be successful.

“Ah, Mrs. Bakugou, a pleasure to see you here,” he greets me once within talking distance before grabbing my outstretched hand for a shake, doing the same to Katsuki, whose eyes harshly scrutinize him.

“The pleasure’s all mine Mr. Nanaka, and you know my husband,” I gesture, to which he lets out a big laugh.

“Who wouldn’t know top hero Dynamight! Big fan here, and let me tell you, we are already creating an entire video game about you pro-heroes!” he exclaimed, flashing a charming smile.

Nanaka Suwa, a young man in his twenties, self-made and becoming more successful by the day. He is charming as one could get, especially with the glistening of his dark hair. I went to middle school with him but haven’t seen him since.

Bakugou grunted before asking, “Video game?”

I laughed awkwardly before quickly replying, “Nanaka here owns a video game company, very successful if I may add,”

Katsuki gave me a look, practically spewing words from his gaze, ‘of course you only came here for business, tch. what can I expect from you.’

“Right, and weren’t you the first to doubt me when I told you back in middle school?”

“Ha, of course, I was! You showed me plans for a company that could rival a second grader,” I exclaimed, surprised that he even mentioned our past friendship.

“Uh, okay. Those drawings are what got me here, attending this gala, walking amongst literal heroes,”

“Alright, alright. Say, draw me up a contract, let’s do some business together,”

He smirked, “You got yourself a new business partner.”

Nanaka walked away, but not before presenting me with his card.

I turned to Bakugou, only to see him chatting with non-other than Ochaco. Pain swarmed my chest, a hurt look on my face as he seemed to gently tuck a piece of her hair back.

An odd memory fluttered in the back of my head, triggered by the scene in front of me. It felt all too familiar, a feeling I thought was long gone. He swore that he stopped loving her, that he loved me. But how I can believe it now as I did back then when for the past few months, nothing but dread occurred in my stomach to watch him seemingly move on from our supposed life together.

Before I could approach them, a hand latched on my shoulder, breaking me away from the thoughts that swam in my head. As I meet his heterochromia eyes, a sudden smile breaks out. “Todoroki!”

“L/n, how are you?” His brows were pushed uncharacteristically, concern deeply imprinted on his face.

I sigh, fighting the urge to look back at the horrific scene, “Doing as best as I can, what about you? Long time no see,” I chided playfully.

“Listen, this may not be the best circumstance, but I have to talk to you privately,”

“Yeah, sure. What’s going on?” I uttered slowly.

______________________________________________________________

The ride home was excruciating, and what tears I expected to burst were but mere droplets that I hadn’t let go past my lashes. Rain was heavy, the perfect weather for a walk outside with an umbrella or hot cocoa and an old sitcom. What a waste.

My face fell as I looked at the package that had arrived at my door; a gift for him. My breath slowed as I picked it up, throwing it in the trash can in his office as soon as I entered.

What! What right does he have to keep me hanging as a trophy wife while he hangs around her! And to think-- just to think that I love him--

loved him? Does he even love me?

Did he ever?

After all the support I've given him, sleepless nights spent worrying over if he'd even make it home, if he's injured or in the hospital, becoming friends with his friends so that he could feel comfortable. Where'd that all go? Could it so easily vanish? The years we had spent together?

It was as if one day he woke up and decided that I wasn't good enough for him. The 2nd top hero in the game. And I tried to get to him, tried to understand, relentlessly. Figures, it was another woman. Something I hadn't expected out of someone whom I knew so well, memorized like poetry.

As quickly and as quietly as I could, I shoved what belongings I had in a spare box we had left. Pictures ripped apart on the floor, books of his mingled with mine thrown mindlessly. Clothes and toiletries in bags. Not a single trace left of me. Except for the couch I had picked, the drapes we hung together, and the paintings I had bought just for him. What a fool.

I wish he had ended it long before this had started.

Why... why couldn’t he???

Why, why, why, why...

Nevermind that. With all my belongings pushed to the front door, it felt like the dagger thrust into my heart for these long, empty months had finally been pulled out.

Staggering to the kitchen island, I left my ring, allowing a teardrop to escape the dam I had tried to build.

______________________________________________________________

Divorce papers were sitting on Bakugou’s desk as he eyed them with distaste. He rubbed his eyes, marked with dark rings. It was a painful reminder of his mistakes when he seemed to awaken from a nightmare at the sight of their apartment that night.

He searched all night long, called her until his phone died, and even dared to ask her parents. She had... simply disappeared. He had assumed until he received these cursed papers in his rough hands.

He didn’t mean to go that far. And she was perfect. Their life together was perfect. Almost too perfect. He got scared. It was a terrifying realization he had nearly five years after the fact, and he couldn’t--

A ping brought him out of his distracted mind. Someone had sent him something. An article. Articles.

The air tensed, stilled.

Her.

Clad in all white, she was smiling, brighter than she had possibly all her life. Receiving what seemed to be an award.

With chairman L/n F/n now retired, his multi-millionaire company falls in the hands of his one and only daughter, L/n Y/n, who has proven herself in the last decade more than...

He swiped quickly, his finger accidentally pressing on the second one he had been sent.

Dating scandal of the month! Here we have it, folks; it seems even successful businessmen can’t keep from the gossip, as we see our beloved L/n Y/n hand in hand with up-and-coming Nanaka Suwa, who had shown up to the event personally to support her...

Oh.

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