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hanniiesuckle17 · 4 years

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Stray Kids Reaction: Going Clubbing with S/o

A/n: not requested officially but one of my mooties was talking to me about it so ! also my last reaction was really angsty so this is just something fun (GIFS ARE NOT MINE! Credit goes to their amazing creators)

(not thoroughly edited sryyy)

Warnings: mild cussing?, drinking, slightly suggested content

Tag List: @distrikt9 @mini-meanhoe @poeticallyspaghetti @hanstagrams @desertofdessert @yangomangos @hoes4hoseok (General Tag List is Open!)

Bangchan:

Chan bopped his head along to the loud music as he waited for you to return from the restroom. “Hi, my friend and I saw you from across the way. Are you with someone by chance?” A pretty girl asked, coming up to him. Her painted nails brushed over the skin of his arm.

“Umm...yeah. I am actually.”

This was the one part about going dancing with you that Chan didn’t like. The moment you left the table, a girl, or sometimes a fan would come up to him and try and get him to come home with them. Chan loved his fans more than anything, but when it came to someone trying to come between you and him he wouldn’t stand for it.

“My friend could use a date as well. Is your friend as handsome as you?”

Chan sighed and looked in the direction you had left in. “Actually, I’m here with my girlfriend.” The girl scoffed and motioned her friend over, who sashayed and sat in your seat at the bar.

“A guy as attractive as you can’t just be tied down to one person!” Her friend exclaimed, gently pushing Chan’s shoulder in a flirty way.

“Sorry, but that’s the only way I do it.” He looked up to see you walking towards him. “Hey, baby girl!” He said wrapping an arm around you and kissing your cheek. You kissed him right back, patting his cheek.

“Hi, sorry. Have we met?” The girls eyed you up and down before walking away. The two of you laughed and you leaned down to kiss him again. “So, that’s why we haven’t been out clubbing in a while.” Chan smiled at you, taking a sip from his drink. “You know I always forget why until we go out.”

Chan only looked at you. It was that look that made you feel like you were the only girl in the club. The only girl in the world. “Dance with me?” He watched you nod, teeth dragging across your lip.

Chan and you danced until your feet hurt and you were out of breath from jumping around to the DJ’s tracks. About one in the morning the two of you left the club, your heels in one hand and the other being held by your boyfriend. He goofily swung your hands as you walked down the street.

“That was SO much fun!” You cheered making him laugh. He laughed even harder when you tried to jump around and ended up wincing from the pain in your feet.

“Piggyback?”

Chan was already crouched down in front of you, his arms reaching back. Who were you to refuse? You carefully jumped on Chan’s back and wrapped your legs around his waist, arms holding tight around his shoulders. The two of you giggled as you walked to the subway station. You sat in his lap on the train planning the next time you two would go out.

“We should bring Felix next time!” You said patting his shoulder in excitement.

“Why?”

“So if people bother you, you can pretend to be foreigners! That’s such a good idea!”

“Baby, I think you are a little drunk.”

Minho:

“Name?” The bouncer asked, looking at his clipboard.

Minho’s right arm stayed glued around your waist as he reached for his wallet. Though most of his face was covered by a mask, his eyes twinkled as he showed the man his ID. He immediately let us through, telling us to enjoy our time.

“Your name really does open doors.” You said holding onto your boyfriend. He laughed at your joke and pulled down his mask as you entered the club. The two of you had been looking forward to going out for so long. The boys were between comebacks so now was the opportune time.

“Drinks or dance first?” He asked, surveying the lively venue. Lasers were bounding off the walls and loud EDM music was being played by a DJ. Taking his hand you led him onto the dance floor. He grinned at your choice. “Ah, a woman after my own heart.”

He goofily spun you around, before his hands fell on your hips, pulling your back to his chest. The two of you danced for a good hour. Minho loved to show off in front of you even if it meant drawing attention to himself. When one of his songs came on you would both look at each other and cheer, before bursting out and doing the dance.

He smiled, watching you dance along to his choreography. The two of you had sweat beading on your foreheads by the time you made your way off the dance floor. Minho pulled you in for a heated kiss before you reached the bar. “I’m having so much fun!” He said against your lips.

“Me too!”

Your boyfriend maneuvered you through the crowd, making sure no one bumped up against you. At the bar, he ordered your drinks and bopped along to the music with you. Your conversation was interrupted by a tap on his shoulder.

“Oh my gosh! It is you!” A girl shrieked, covering her mouth. “You’re Lee Know from Stray Kids!” He gave her a kind smile and nodded, looking over to you. You were used to this happening. “Can we get a picture?” He nodded and motioned for the girl and her friend to come closer to him.

“Babe, could you take the picture?”

You smiled, taking the girl’s phone and snapping a couple pictures. The girls both gave Minho huge hugs. You loved watching him with his fans. The other leaned over to you while her friend talked to Minho. “You are so lucky!” She said over the music.

After a few minutes the girls returned to their group leaving Minho and you alone. “Back to dancing?” He asked dowing the rest of his drink. You cheered grabbing your glass from off the bar.

The two of you danced until the DJ physically had to ask you to get off the floor because the club was closing. Minho wrapped a tired arm around you as the two of you walked, looking for a taxi. “We should go back next weekend.” He said, looking up at the night sky.

“There’s a new nightclub opening this Thursday, we could go then. I heard they are doing a blacklight rave for the opening!”

“Oh, we are so going to that!”

Changbin:

You and Changbin were still in the very early stages of your relationship. The two of you had passed the honeymoon phase and were now entering the ‘chicken’ part of the relationship. You were ready to get serious with Changbin and so was he. However, in this part of the relationship neither of you wanted to seem like a boring dud so when an activity was suggested (no matter how out of your comfort zone) you both agreed to it, not wanting the other one to think you were the boring one.

The music pumped through the speakers at an earsplitting volume. How did you end up here? That’s right. Felix and Minho wanted to go dancing at this brand new club that had opened down town. It was supposed to be this crazy new clubbing experience and the boys were excited to go try it. Changbin turned to you after they invited both of you.

“Clubbing?” He asked hesitantly. Clubbing wasn’t necessarily your style. You would more likely prefer to be at home with Changbin with a pizza, he seemed up for it. (He was in fact not up for it. He wanted nothing more than to go to a chill movie with you that night.) The two of you shared a hidden strained look, scanning for any sign that the other was wanting to do anything but this.

“Sure!” Both of you said. Felix and Minho cheered high fiving each other. Little did you know, as you both looked away from each other, looks of regret were on both of your faces.

You were awkwardly dancing next to Changbin smiling at his goofy moves. Every now and then he would pull you closer, wanting to dance with you but Felix or Minho would join in and ruin the moment. Changbin was a fantastic dancer and it seemed he could go for ages. (He could not in fact go for ages. He wanted you to think he had good stamina. He was literally gasping every time you looked away.)

“You want to get a drink?” You leaned into him, shouting over the music. He nodded, hand on the small of your back, leading you to the bar. Finally, the two of you made it to the bar, finding an open seat for you to sit down in. Your feet were killing you. “What do you want to drink?” You asked, holding his hand.

“Ummm...I’ll just do a beer.” He shrugged his shoulders, smiling at you. (Lie. He wanted one of those sweet colorful drinks with fruit on the rim and a swirly straw.) You ordered for the two of you and smiled feeling Changbin’s lips press to your cheek. “Are you having fun?” He asked, trying to hide the strain in his smile as you sipped on your drinks.

“Yeah!” You nodded, looking out into the club. Changbin was nodding his head to the music. He looked like he was enjoying himself, but you couldn’t do this anymore. “Actually,” He turned, giving you his full attention. “I’d rather be anywhere else right now.”

His eyes widened and you were surprised when he laughed and started dragging out of the club. “Thank goodness! Let’s get out of here. I want cheap pizza.”

You grinned holding tight onto his hand. “Yes! Cheap pizza sounds awesome!”

Hyunjin:

Half the fun of going clubbing with Hyunjin was waiting in the line outside. It was usually cold, so his arms were wrapped tight around you as you patiently and slowly moved forward in the queue. Hyunjin always made the most boring things in life fun. In fact, you loved waiting in lines with him.

“But, yeah, she totally stole the first eight paragraphs of my thesis.” You said, shivering in Hyunjin’s arms.

“That bitch.” You smiled up at his dramatic reaction. The two of you shuffled forward almost at the front of the line. You noticed a few people across the street staring at you, some with phones in their hands.

“Fan alert,” You whispered, causing Hyunjin to look up and around him. Your relationship wasn’t a secret. The boys had been off the dating ban for awhile. No one was surprised Hyunjin was the first to get a girlfriend. He waved over to the fans who screamed a little bit, making the two of you laugh.

“How much you wanna bet that we have photos on twitter within the next hour?” He said wiggling his eyes brows. You hummed, cupping his cheeks.

“I think they’ll be up in the next ten minutes.”

Hyunjin scoffed, his eyes crinkling in a smile. “You’re on. Loser buys drinks?” After agreeing to the bet you watched the fans who were still across the street. You turned his head, a cheeky smile on your face. Hyunjin smiled when your lips pressed against his, girls squealing across the street, Thankfully your heels made the distance to his lips shorter. He pulled away, a smirk on the corner of his mouth. “You always cheat.”

“No, I always win.”

By the time you got into the club, you were correct. The pictures of you and Hyunjin were already trending on twitter. He paid for your drink and the two of you spent the next twenty minutes taking pictures for SNS. “I’m not going to take a picture after I’m all sweaty!” Hyunjin whined as he posed for you near an LED decoration. “Also, you look really hot holding that martini glass.” He said making you blush.

The two of you finished your drinks before heading out onto the dance floor. Hyunjin always liked dancing towards the middle, he liked being in the crowd. It was a change of pace for him since he was usually on stage. Your hands draped around his neck playing with his blonde hair, as you danced, bodies pressed together.

Going dancing with Hyunjin was one of your favorite things. There was never a bad part of the night and you almost always ended up continuing the night back at your shared apartment. Hyunjin smiled, feeling you grind up against him.

“You really want to do that here?” He asked, nipping at your ear.

After a few hours of mutual teasing, the two of you would climb into a cab, a little tipsy, and go back to your apartment. You would giggle at his jokes, legs draped over his lap as you two drove through the lit up city.

Jisung:

Sweat dripped down the back of your neck. You had been dancing with some of the boys for a little over an hour. The only way to convince Jisung to go clubbing with you was if all the boys came along. You were surrounded by the dance line of Stray Kids as well as Jeongin and Changbin. Your boyfriend had decided he wanted to stay at the bar, with Seungmin and Chan.

You looked over to see him smiling at you as you and Felix danced in all sorts of weird ways. He twirled you around making you laugh. “Lix, I’m going to go get a drink!” You shouted over the thumping music. Felix gave you a thumbs up before dancing with Changbin and Innie. As you walked away the three of them started up a kickline.

You walked up the bar laughing. Seeing you coming, Jisung wrapped an arm around your waist, pulling you into his chest. “Hi, handsome!” You said kissing his cheek. Seungmin rolled his eyes and Chan smiled at the two of you. Jisung watched as you leaned on the bar, flagging down a bartender. “Can I get a manhattan?” The man nodded and told you the total for the drink.

“I’ve got it,” Jisung said, pulling out his card before you could reach for yours. The bartender looked to you, making sure it was okay to let Jisung pay for your drink. You nodded and wrapped your arms around Jisung’s neck.

“You didn’t have to pay for my drink.”

“Yeah, but I wanted to.”

Jisung wasn’t normally the club type. He was your little introvert. But, he was wrapped around your fingers so twice a year he would go out clubbing with you as long as the other boys came along. You sat and talked with the boys while sipping on your drink. Jisung kept his hand around your middle as the colorful lights bounced off your faces.

Setting the empty glass on the bartop you leaned in pressing your lips close to Jisung’s ear. “Dance with me?” You felt him shiver, a smirk slipping onto your lips.

“Bye, Assholes! I’m dancing!”

Jisung dragged you out onto the dance floor waving goodbye to his friends. Instead of bringing you to the other boys, he pulled you to the center of the room, eyes trained on you as he moved with you to the beat. You turned around, your back pressed up against his chest.

“Why don’t you dance like this with me at home?” He whispered in your ear.

You smirked, reaching behind you and playing with his hair. “Why don’t you come to the club with me more often?” He laughed at your question, hands gripping your hips, rolling against his own.

“Cause I’d rather be at home doing other things with you.”

You smiled, feeling his grip tighten on your hips. “Well, they do have a bathroom here you know?” You could practically feel the heat rushing to Jisung’s cheeks, but he wasted no time in dragging you down the hall towards the bathrooms.

“Shit, thank goodness for lockable doors.” He whispered before pressing a heated kiss to your lips.

Felix:

The colorful lights bounced off any surface they landed on creating a euphoric glow in the room. Felix was still dancing out on the floor. You stood by the bar waiting for drinks. You were more likely to get drinks at the busy bar than Felix was. Finally, the bartender came over and asked for your drink order.

“Ummm...” You tried to think of a drink Felix would like since he didn’t specify. He usually trusted you to order for him if he couldn't order himself. “I’ll do a Tom Collins and a Cosmo.” The bartender nodded and started working on your drinks. You listened to the shake of the tin as you waited and looked around the nightclub.

A guy across the bar with dark hair waved at you with a sly smirk. Being polite you waved back but turned the other way. You heard a loud sigh beside you. Turning you saw a sweaty Felix leaning against the bar.

“Hey, darling!” He tapped on the bar, still catching his breath. “What did you get me?” You smiled and told him the drink just as the bartender set the two glasses in front of you. As you reached for your cosmo, the bartender started to speak.

“Your drinks were paid for already by that guy over there.”

Turning you saw him pointing to the guy from earlier. He waved and sent you a wink. Felix tried his best not to laugh. He inched closer eyeing the man across the bar. “Well, guess having a smoking hot girlfriend does have its perks.” He whispered into your ear, before kissing you.

“How come you get free drinks out of this and I get weird guys hitting on me?”

“Well, you get free drinks too.” He laughed as you shrugged. You sipped on the sweet drink. “You wanna take this to a back booth?” Your boyfriend questioned motioning towards some secluded areas towards the back of the club. It only took a small nod for him to lace his fingers with yours and drag you to the area behind the dance floor.

Felix ordered bottle service for you both, since clubbing was sort of special occasion for you two. He liked going out clubbing, but it was a sort of special treat since he was always so busy. You spent the rest of the night in your private booth, drinking from the rather expensive bottle Felix ordered. You giggled and joked around, loving being in the upbeat atmosphere with Felix.

Before the two of you left the venue, you both took turns taking aesthetic photos at the club. Felix was the king of making your photos look good. After the two of you got your photos and had a quick makeout session on the dance floor the two of you headed back to your shared apartment.

The next day would consist of debating which one of you would get out of bed to A) get the door when your takeout arrived and B) get the coffee and hangover medicine from the bathroom. It would be a quiet day with lots of ‘shhh-ing’ from the hangover headaches.

Seungmin:

Seungmin wasn’t excited about going clubbing, but he knew how much you loved going out. You loved the whole process. Finding the perfect outfit, searching the bottom of your makeup bag for the best waterproof non-transfer eyeliner. Your favorite part was Seungmin letting you style him for the one night. It was fun having your own personal Ken doll/ boyfriend.

You met the rest of the boys at the club. They cheered seeing the two of you walk in together. Since everyone came along you got a private booth and bottle service for the table. Seungmin smiled seeing you enjoy yourself. “You want to go dance?” You asked, setting down your drink. Seungmin shook his head, lifting his arm from your shoulder.

“No, I’ll stay here and watch your drink for you. I think Chan and Felix are out there though.”

He pointed out onto the dance floor to where the aussies were dancing. Well, Felix was dancing...Chan was pulling out some ‘dad’ moves, making Felix cringe. “Thank you, Minnie,” You said kissing his cheek. “I’ll go save Felix from our resident ‘dad’.” He laughed as you got up from the booth.

He watched you dance your way over to the boys a smile on his face.

“How long are you staying out this time?” Jisung asked, sipping on his third drink of the night. Seungmin shrugged.

“Probably until she gets tired or I have to carry her out. Whichever comes first.”

The boys around him laughed. With loving eyes, he looked over and watched you goof around with his friends. Chan spun you around like you were ballroom dancing and Felix did the robot with you.

You looked over at your boyfriend, giving him a bright smile and wave, the backlights making your teeth look whiter than usual. He waved back, sending you a finger heart, eliciting a giggle from your lips.

“Dude, you are so whipped,” Hyunjin said witnessing the exchange. Seungmin glared at him from across the table. It quickly disappeared when he felt your hand on his shoulder.

“Minnie! You sure you don’t want to dance with me?” Your eyes sparkled under the colorful flashing lights. How could he say no to that smile? He looked to the boys who were watching him expectantly, wiggling their eyebrows and making childish gestures.

“Just one dance,” He said, letting you pull him up from the booth and onto the floor. One dance turned into two. Two turned into four. Soon you were the one carrying him home because his feet hurt too much. “You evil person, you made me dance too much!” He whined, arm hanging off your shoulder as you left the club.

“You’re the one who ran back onto the dance floor when they started playing Day6.”

Jeongin:

Jeongin ruffled his hair, pieces sticking to his forehead with sweat. He had been dancing with you for hours. It was your birthday, and you wanted to celebrate by going out to a club.

He had surprised you by renting out the venue and inviting all your friends including the other boys. “Are you having a good time?” He asked, twirling you around with a bright smile.

“Are you kidding?!” You squealed, leaping into his arms. “This is incredible. I can’t believe you did this, Jeongin!” He blushed feeling you press your lips against his. He felt proud, being able to make you this happy.

You had long since abandoned your heels, choosing to throw them with Jeongin’s jacket. He watched your bare feet pad against the concrete floor as you dragged him back onto the dance floor. He loved that out of everyone here at your party, you wanted nothing more than to spend your time with him.

Your friends passed by, giving you birthday wishes and greeting your boyfriend as well. “Don’t you want to spend time with your other friends?’ He asked dancing with you, as the song changed.

You shrugged taking his hands in yours. “Everyone I could possibly want to be with is standing in front of me.” Heat rose to your boyfriend’s cheeks, making you smile. Your arms wrapped around his neck.

After the party had ended, you and the boys tiredly stumbled out of the club, singing random songs. Jeongin’s smile glowed under the street lights. The two of you watched as Chan and Minho tried to pull a drunk Jisung away from climbing a light post. The two of you laughed, Jeongin stepping into the street to hail a cab.

Before he could open the door for you, Jisung pushed passed him with a laugh as Chan worked on shoving him into the vehicle. “Sorry guys! I think we need this one.” You all laughed as Changbin and Minho joined them in the cab, purposefully squishing Jisung in the middle.

The cool night air brushed over your shoulders making you shiver. Noticing, Jeongin took off his jacket and wrapped it around you. “This has been the best birthday. Thank you, Innie!” You leaned up and kissed him, making the remaining boys whoop and holler.

The two of you waited until all the boys had left safely, some more safely and sober than others. He laced his long fingers with yours, before walking down the street with you. In the other hand he carried your heels. “You really are the best boyfriend.”

He shrugged, a shy smile on his face, his eyes trained down on the pavement. “Promise me one thing?” He asked, swinging your hands between the two of you.

“Of course,”

“Don’t make me go clubbing more than once a year. That was exhausting taking care of the rest of the boys.” You burst out in laughter before nodding and kissing his cheek.

Requests are open my lovelies! Just send an ask!

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tokoyamisstuff · 4 years

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Betrothred Ch. 2 - Illumi Zoldyck x Reader

Chapter 2: Bonding

Summary: You’re slowly accomodating to living in your new household, but getting close to your partner is harder than expected.

Warnings: Self doubts, maybe.

Words: ~1600

Song used: Rise Against - Hero of War

Story Masterlist

The following weeks were uneventful, considering that you weren’t allowed to leave the Zoldyck property at all.

Since you were now considered a Zoldyck, a great deal of people would now see you as their target. An easy one too, because you weren’t even half as strong as the rest of the family.

Some would even go as far as to say you’re now Illumi’s weak spot - even though your husband was confident in his ability to protect you.

Anyway, you would need to spend your days on Kukuroo Mountain until the head of the family evaluated you to be strong enough to defend yourself even without Illumi at your side. Only then you’d be allowed to go on missions again.

Even though you had all comforts one could wish for, it was pretty boring in here with no one around except for this unsettling distanced family members. Most of the time they’d just mind their own business unless it’s about work.

There was also the crippling feeling of uselessness plagueing your mind. You tried to compensate for it through your efforts, though.

You and Illumi were living in the main residence, of course, yet had a wing completely build solely for the two of you. It was just like a small but luxury apartement, with a great bathroom, kitchen and whatever else one would need.

Especially the balconry was to your liking. You prefered to spend your time there, simply enjoying the sounds of nature.

It was a day like all the ones before, with you trying to pass time through educating yourself. Might be useful somehow.

You immediately heared a crack of the main door, jumping up from your seat to greet him.

Illumi had been away on a mission for three weeks already, and you just couldn’t wait to see him again. You stopped yourself in front of him, knowing close physical contact was discomforting to the man.

“Welcome home, master.” Just as you were about to take a bow, Illumi brought his hand to your chin and lifted it once again.

“No need to be so formal” he spoke, and you had to admit that the stoic sound of his voice had somehow become calming to you. “I’m your husband now. Just call me like you did before.”

“I missed you, Lumi.” You had just realized it yourself, yet had already blurted it out aloud. How embarassing...

“Oh? That’s good, I think.” He tapped his chin like he’d always do to muse aloud, trying to cover up that this much affection overstepped the limits of his emotional capability.

Trying to change the topic, you just now remembered the heavy storm that was raging outside. “You’re dripping wet!”

“So?” He tilted his head in confusion, still standing at the entrance as you wrapped a towel around his shoulders.

Hunger, cold, sleep deprivation, pain...

Even though none of these could hinder him from functioning, you assumed the feeling was still bothersome. The cold could still affect him that way.

For a second, you had to laugh at yourself. Worried, about him of all people? Ridiculous.

“Take your clothes off” you demanded, a warning finger swirling in the air. “I’ll run you a bath.”

In his free time, Illumi seemed even more like an empty shell. You could say he was pretty boring, even.

But it was fun to teach him all kinds of new stuff - things he was never able to experience or enjoy. Could he even feel something like that?

Since Illumi was raised to be absent of any hopes or desires, he obviously didn’t follow any hobbies either. Except for work, training and the well-being of his family, nothing seemed to be of real importance for him.

So he’d simply shrug it off, following your orders since he had nothing better to do anyway. “As you wish.”

When your husband stepped into the bathroom you had prepared for him, the air was scented with a floral fragrance. You even had lighted a few candles, enveloping the room in a dim light.

It was hard not to stare at the slender man, but you peeked a time or two: His porcellain skin was covered in several scars, and he was more muscular than you had imagined.

In an unconventionalway, he looked like a piece of art.

“Come on in!” you cheered, gesturing towards the perfectly warm water. As he sunk down into the tub, you chuckled at how stiffly he was sitting inside. “Lean backwards, like this!”

You adjusted yourself on a chair next to the bathtub, beginning to gently wash his hair. “Close your eyes” you cooed, gently massaging his neck before running your fingers along his shoulders.

And after a while, his rigid body slowly began to relax - a small feeling of achievement blooming in your chest.

Picking up a comb from the edge of the sink, you began to run it through his silky hair. It almost made you fuming again about how he once wanted to cut it off, because it was ‘a hindrance in battle’.

Yet you couldn’t help it, for the calming atmosphere made you start singing out of a whim:

“A hero of war Is that what they see Just medals and scars So damn proud of me And I brought home that flag Now it gathers dust But it's a flag that I love It's the only flag I trust”

Illumi’s eyes opened slowly, dark orbs pinning you as you detected some kind of wonder in them. “Y/N?”

“Y-Yes?!” The closeness you had craved so bad had you forget about who exactly you were trying to indulge.

“Why did you agree to marry me?” Now where did that question come from?!

"Huh? I- umm...” You began to stammer, frantically scanning your mind for an answer. “Because I like you, I guess.”

You didn’t dare to say love - not yet at least. Maybe someday...

“Mhh. I see.” Illumi turned his head away and closed his eyes again, almost as if zoning out. “I knew you were clinging to unnecessary sentiments, but I didn’t think they’d go this far.”

Was that a compliment or an insult? You didn’t know, but somehow felt offended.

"And why did you ask me to marry you in the first place?”

You just couldn’t help but pitying yourself right now. Of course you were sparring as much as your body could handle, yet at the moment all you could provide for your husband were kind gifts and actions.

“I thought I already made myself clear: You’re an extraordinary individual, and I thought you to be a fitting mate.”

Wow.

“You must be tired” you murmured as you softly rubbed his temples, trying to change the topic.

How stupid of you to think he was actually capable of feeling such a complex emotion - and yet you were disappointed.

“How odd” Illumi suddenly vocalized his cogitation, then falling silent again.

“What is it?” you inquired as you patiently encoated his hair with a towel.

“How very odd” he repeated once again, seemingly overchallenged.

No use in talking this over, huh...

“Let’s get you to bed” you chanted, still all friendly and he wondered why you’d bother yourself with things he could easily do himself.

Truth be spoken: Illumi Zoldyck would most likely forget to eat or clean himself way longer than necessary. Taking basic care for himself was just not present in his mind, and more than often he’d do it pretty sloppy just to get it over with quick.

Wrapping the heavy blanket over yourself, Illumi’s stiff posture was a huge contrast to the soft bed. Only looking at him made you uncomfortable.

And yet: Sharing this bed together, you were glad that he gave you the freedom to decide when you were ready to, well...take the next step.

There was no need to hurry, he once told you. Since you were now all his.

Even in the dark you could spot the emotionless black pit that was his orbs. But you saw something different: You liked to imagine the universe in them, and the brightw stars to be only hidden from plain sight.

“How do you feel?” you spoke softly, knowing he wouldn’t be able to sleep for a long time anyway.

“Indifferent.”

You didn’t expect anything else, to be honest. “Well, I’m grateful.”

“What for?” Sometimes it felt as if he’d only fake interest, but even that you were happy about - because it gave you hope that at least somehow, he was trying to make you feel home.

Maybe you were just imagining things, though.

“Oh” you started, giggling shyly. “Many things: That you stepped into my life, for example. Chosing me as your partner. Or simply for you coming home safely, and that you’ve let me spoil you a little.”

The absence of an answer made you think he already fell into a dreamless slumber, so you decided to give him some rest. He probably had a harsh mission and right afterwards you had clung on him, almost as if he was a social experiment.

This whole day probably was a little much for someone who had never felt a single pleasant bodily contact before.

Little did you know that your husband was still wide awake, yet deeply buried in thought.

Yes.

Your presence seemed to be beneficial in other ways than practical, he concluded.

But how exactly? He was unable to put it in words.

Yet the rest of the evening, his mind was fogged by your lingering touch and the memory of your soothing voice.

To Illumi, the power you had over him was more dangerous than Nen itself.

___

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#Illumi x Reader #Illumi Zoldyck #Illumi Zoldyck x Reader #HxH #Self Insert #Arranged Marriage AU #Zoldyck Family #Writing #Fanfiction

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orsuliya · 3 years

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I love Awu when she's in boss wifey mood.

In ep. 44 we find out that Qianer not just assaulted Xiao Qi but the drugs were extremely dangerous and would cause a great harm to a man. And while they're listening, Awu looks at XQ, at his vulnerable face, and she is totally in "i'm going to tear the bitch apart, no one can touch my man" mood. And then she literally destroys Qianer.

However Awu didn't let her grudges go. In ep.57 she still accuses her evil cousin. "Because of your treacherous tactics, you guys have hurt the prince!". Yeah Awu, protect your man 👍

How do you think they spend the night after the cousin's assault?

My answer to that question changes regularly, depending on the mood, which is just great, let me tell you. And I'm not even being sarcastic; it's always good to have some options to choose from! As far as I'm concerned those options are as follows:

Option 1. Hurt and Comfort.

Do you remember how Doctor Shen recommended strong tea as a way to get rid of the remaining poison faster? Which is valid; while tea isn't truly a detoxificant on its own, it can support your body's natural detox mechanisms. So basically Xiao Qi is meant to sit tight and wait for all the unpleasant side effects to pass. Oh, and hydrate, which is always a good idea and doubly so when dealing with blood loss.

Well, since Xiao Qi's movements are justifiably unsteady and even in the morning he's pretty much down one hand, I don't think that he should be left to hydrate on his own. Give that man some help! Cue a vison of Awu holding a teacup to Xiao Qi's lips before helping him to lie down, his head resting on her knees and then gently stroking his hair away from his forehead as she tells him what exactly happened to the Screechers and why poor Turnip had to physically drag Screecher Junior to his carriage through the entire courtyard.

There is a distinct possibility that she also takes this opportunity to apologize, both for unwittingly putting him in danger and for going behind his back with Helan Zhen. Which Xiao Qi explicitly refuses to listen to, raising his healthy hand and putting his fingers on Awu lips, just as she did to him before. It's not like he didn't go behind her back, so they're pretty much even, no need for any apologies. And besides, it's hard to recognize an enemy who disguises herself as a civilian under your care.

Option 2. Hurt and Horniness.

That option should be pretty self-explanatory, I think. Doctor Shen confirms that while blood-letting helped Xiao Qi not to, you know, die, it hasn't gotten rid of the problem in its entirety, hence the prescription of tea and rest. So the remaining effects should be harmless enough to let the patient deal with them on his own, without the necessity of expert help. By which I mean Doctor Shen and his medicines, you filthy-minded creatures.

Still, you can't deny that Xiao Qi looks rather, ah, peaky, even after some helpful soul wipes the sweat off his face. Was that Turnip, I wonder...? Just kidding, although such an act could double as a rather effective anti-aphrodisiac.

While expert help is not required or needed, I don't think that Xiao Qi would reject a helping hand - or any other body part - offered to him by his beautiful and compassionate wife. Who might be getting something out of this deal, since I doubt it's pure altruism that has her looking like the cat that got the cream over breakfast and boast about getting a good night's sleep despite rising unusually early. Mind you, it could be simply joy and relief caused by having their home declared a Screecher-free zone.

Option 3. Hurt and Realism.

Life is (sadly) not all fanfiction cliches and cdrama biology. Now, if anyone knows what the drug in question is actually supposed to be, do share, but personally I'd bet on something containing toad secretions. Those have been long used in Chinese medicine, also as aphrodisiacs, can be lethal in wrong doses leading to heart attacks and the like, and, which is most significant, can have hallucinogenic properties. Which is exactly what Xiao Qi seems to be experiencing and what prompts him to go straight for the knife. We've been told a few times before that he doesn't drink and the explanation provided by Song Huaien is that he never ever wants to lose the clarity of mind. If sobriety and clear head is that important, there must be a reason for it, which could, incidentally, double as a reason to panic and start with the cutting instead of, I don't know, crying for help. Like a sane person.

These kinds of medicines can also have some pretty nasty side-effects, including reduced clotting, diarrhea, mouth ulcers and myalgia. The last one seems to be our winner as it's clear that Xiao Qi is having trouble with moving. At one point during his conversation with Turnip he tries to curl onto himself and later on starts panting, as if experiencing a serious rib cramp. Which is just about the worst thing in the world. I trust TRP on details and this all fits a bit too well. Combined with severe blood loss, which must have been significant, even if not up to the point of causing hypovolemic shock, there is every chance that Xiao Qi's night will be pretty miserable. Once the adrenaline rush is over we're most likely to be left with a sweating, woozy, drowsy and fatigued log in serious pain. Oh joy!

Sooo... Which option do you choose?

By the way, I'm a very big fan of morally destroying Miss Screecher, if you couldn't tell. Not as much as some of you and certainly not as much as a certain proponent of skinning her like a rabbit, to whom I shall get back at a later date, but still. Hold onto that grudge, Awu, and never let it go!

#ask and answer #the rebel princess #if anybody has another option or five I'll take them #or we can always pick and mix I guess

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mirismuffins-ovo · 3 years

Text

Plant Palace ☘️Pt 2

Warning ⚠️ Mpreg

He removed his hands and stood up, helping John to his feet. “So, dinner, what do you have in mind? I’d like to help.” He gave off a cheesy grin.

John blushed and the small cat jumped off his lap when he stood up. “Well we can make some rice n beans,along with some broccoli and carrots” Giving a meek smile and leading him into the kitchen and getting out the broccoli and carrots from the fridge. Taking out the chopping board and a knife and then some pots for the rice and beans “would you mind making the rice and beans while I cut the vegetables?” Eddie had nodded and began to prep the pot's boiling water before adding the rice in.

John had begun to cut the vegetables chopping the carrots awkwardly for a moment until he got into a rhythm. He got too cocky with the speed he was chopping and gave out a small pained hiss when he cut his finger. Cursing under his breath he watched as he saw small roots branching off the carrot growing more off the small slice. Small flowers blooming from the cut he quickly rushed to throw out the carrot slice and painfully ripped out the plants in his wound throwing it in the trash. He heard Eddie say something to him in concern but John ignored him. “I’ll be back..I’m gonna get a bandage” he rushed to the bathroom to get a band-aid.

“Let me know if you need help!” Eddie called over his shoulder.

He saw the water boil so he turned it down for the rice and set it aside. Next he got to work on the beans, washing them then boiling them a bit. John returned a few minutes later looking frazzled. The other shaked it off and resumed cooking.

“Rice is done, beans are cooking? I hope I’m not messing them up.” He said, looking into the pot with curiosity. All he’s ever cooked were beans in a can.

“I bet they’re great” He said in a more calmed tone,continuing with the vegetables before placing them in with the rice and beans “we’ll let them steam for a lil bit” He placed the cap onto the pot and stretched some more,his back was still aching and he felt somewhat dried out “Maybe after eating I’ll take a bath” He shrugged,part of him wanted to ask Eddie to join him but he was never that brave. Tiredly he sat up on the counter and motioned for Eddie to come over. Eddie had walked over to John who was now his height sitting on the counter,John gave Eddie a small hug resting his arms on Eddie's shoulders. The smaller man pulled back for a moment before giving Eddie a small hesitant kiss. John was pretty tired and he always became low energy once the sun started to set. His kiss was gentle and soft,still radiating the flowering scent that consumed the both of them.

Eddie wrapped his arms back around John and held him. The kiss was a surprise, but it felt good. He kissed back, before resting his head on John’s chest. They stayed still for a moment, just enjoying each other’s presence. He had grown to love John a lot since meeting him and working for him. He was his breath of fresh air and his newest inspiration for music.

His team was curious as to why they wanted to go a little soft and gentle with their music. Eddie decided to do a few calm songs to make a small EP for his own side stuff. Right now everything was instrumental, and one day hoped to perfect it enough to share it with John. As his ear rested against the younger man’s chest, he could hear the steady heartbeat and something else. It was lighter, quicker, but seemed to match a rhythm.

He pulled away, he needed paper. John was confused at first as Eddie asked for paper and a pen. He got off the counter and found some scrap paper and a pen, handing it over. Eddie quickly drew 5 lines in a row before looking at the confused botanist.

“Stay still.” He asked as he placed his ear to his boyfriend’s chest again, listening for the quick beats. He closed his eyes and envisioned the sound then began to write. The singer got lost in his world, confusing John who left to go fix the food before it burned.

Eddie opened an app on his phone to record a synthesized beat, lost in his zone. He was in his zone, trying to get it right until John tapped him on the shoulder, scaring him out of his little world.

“Ah! Oh, sorry!” He realized what had happened. “Oh no, I’m so so sorry! I just heard your heartbeat and I just had to write music around it. It was… I can’t explain it, but it sounded like you had two heartbeats. There was a big and steady one then a sub beat that was quick and light. I tend to get lost when I hear a good beat. Inspiration just struck me and I had to write it down.” He felt bad for zoning out his boyfriend but once he could put guitar and drums to it, it was going to be a song. John’s song. A song for him.

John couldn’t help but blush at what he said “oh..that’s pretty sweet” He pushed his hair back with one free hand after handing a bowl of food to Eddie “didn’t know my heart made such an interesting rhythm” He laughed softly as he guided Eddie to his bed to go eat in the comfort of his room. “Let's get comfortable,you can write later luv” John's voice was a gentle soft tone as he took his shoes off and sat in bed,Eddie following suit. Them eating together on the bed,John had brought some water to his room, downing the large glass quickly. He basically inhaled his food,he hadn’t mentioned how hungry he’d been recently. He’d felt his stomach start cramping again and the idea of a warm bath coming to him again hoping it’d help. “I was thinking of taking a bath..if you’d like” His face felt hot and was red. “you could join me?” John's words were shy and shaky as he made the offer.

Eddie was surprised to see how hungry John was, but thankful his sickness was passing and he could eat normally. But when he mentioned the bath, Eddie got all shy. Of course he wanted to become more intimate with his boyfriend. He nodded, taking in his last bite of food and taking the bowls while John ran the bath. He took a moment in the kitchen to gather his thoughts.

I mean… he will sit in your lap to fit in the tub. That sounds nice. He could hear his mind smirking. He shook his head. He needed to be respectful. He heard John call him from the bathroom. Nervously he wiped his hands on his shirt to get rid of the sweat and followed the younger male into the bathroom.

John couldn’t help but feel nervous and decently body conscious since he’s put on a few pounds. He looked up at the taller man as he took off his pants sighing in relief when the tight buttons no longer smushed his pudgy belly.

“I’m not making you uncomfortable at all am I?”

John turned around to face him all the way,only standing in his boxers and loose shirt. He didn’t wanna make Eddie feel weird at all,but John at the same time couldn’t help but feel the need for physical comfort. He glanced away as Eddie also got undressed,John slid his shirt off shyly revealing his pale pudginess. Now only in his boxers and ready to get in the tub.

“Not at all.” Eddie replied with a red face. He turned away. “I’ll keep my back so you can jump in first.”

He heard the water slosh around as John got in. John did the same, looking away as Eddie finished getting undressed and stepped in himself behind John. He got comfortable before opening his arms for the younger man to sit in his lap and relax, his fluffy red hair tickling his chin. The two let out a duel sigh, thankful to finally relax.

The two relaxed for a bit but as soon as they felt the water start to grow cold, they washed up quickly and got out. Eddie stepped out first to grab a towel and wrap it around his waist before helping John up and out, setting a towel around the man’s shoulders to help dry him off. They had their backs turned to give each other some privacy as they dried off. Eddie loved the contact the two had in the bath, just holding onto each other and enjoying the quiet. But what next? Was a movie in order? Was he staying the night? He didn’t want to impose.

Once the two finished dressing, they returned to the bed to relax some more.

John went back to the bathroom and dried off his hair which was now a red puffy mess. He dried off his body a bit more and he looked in the mirror for a moment while he combed his hair. His tummy had been noticeably more swollen than normal,it made him anxious. It looked like it was just small pudge,he gently rubbed it. He could feel the cramping again and he tugged at what used to be a loose t-shirt on him. He focused for a moment on the cramping and winced slightly at a small pressure he felt. He was lost in thought and hovered his hands over his stomach to test something. He put energy forth that he’d normally do when growing plants. He felt internal panic when he felt slight squirming and saw the bump grow slightly. Johns face went flushed and he held his stomach in his arms tightly. He didn’t know what this meant.

Only taken out of this trance when he heard Eddie call out to him checking if he was okay.

“I-I’m fine!..” He tried to hide that he was trembling,in denial of what just happened. John slid back out of the bathroom and back to Eddie who was lying in bed.

Eddie felt something was off again. John had joined him back on the bed with a clouded look on his face. He sat up and inched closer to the man.

“John, you’re really starting to worry me.”

He reached up to take his hands noticing John’s usual loose fitting clothes looked more snug. He almost looked… pregnant. It wasn’t a usual pudge with the weight hanging over the waistline, no it looked almost too perfectly round. It was small and didn’t look right. He wanted to say something but didn’t want to frazzle the man any further than he already was. All Eddie could do was wait.

He let out a shaky breath and couldn’t look at Eddie only past him.John spoke in a soft flat tone “I’m okay..alright Eddie?” He tugged at his shirt some more and sat up straight pulling some of the blankets over him to hide his growing tummy. John didn’t know how to explain what'd just happened in the bathroom. He didn’t want Eddie to get super involved because he knew it might be an abnormal thing and he was still considerably afraid to tell his boyfriend. John hadn’t noticed the small leafs and buds that’d barely grown from John's small test. He was guessing there was a chance he had seeds inside his stomach and maybe that was what was happening.

“Okay, I’ll drop it. I’m sorry for pestering you about it… I just want you to know you can trust me if you need help.”

He looked at his boyfriend with sincere eyes and let go of his hands, sitting back in the bed, opening his arms. John crawled onto the bed and snuggled up to him. Bitty had joined them too, curling up closer to the younger man, purring up a storm.

Eddie was feeling tired but wanted to stay up with John. As they sat there, enjoying each other’s company it wasn’t long until Eddie could hear the soft evened breath of John. He was asleep, curled up to him, his head on his chest. He carefully moved them to lay down and turned off the lamps before cuddling him back and the two fell asleep.

#mpreg kink #mpreg belly #mpreg story

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mamabearcatfanfics · 3 years

Photo

It was already written, so I didn’t have to keep you in suspense for long. Here’s Part Two of Song and Dance Man. You can read the first part here, or go read the whole thing on AO3. Enjoy!

🎵

When Kagome had lifted her heavy head from her pillow the next morning and looked at her phone, there were ten messages. One from Shiori, one from Sango, and eight from Inuyasha.

She let her head flop back on the pillow, deciding not to open any of them yet. She wasn’t hiding, not exactly. This morning, she just wanted to pretend for a little while that everything was okay, have a quiet breakfast with her family, who she hadn’t seen for nearly a month, and then deal with the fall out.

The message from Shiori would no doubt be calm and caring. Sango’s message would also be caring, but she was pretty sure it would not be calm. And Inuyasha. She didn’t know. She didn’t know what to think. She’d put that in ‘after breakfast Kagome’s’ problem pile. Right now, she felt like crap, her period had finally arrived, and she needed to stand under a hot shower for at least, forever.

So she dragged herself to the bathroom and took some pain relief, had a shower, rummaged in her childhood bedroom for any clean clothes that still fit and found a pair of cut off jean shorts and a t-shirt from drama club that proclaimed Theatre is my Sport, then walked downstairs to the kitchen to sit listlessly at the table.

Grandpa read the paper, flicking the pages noisily every time he turned a page, making comments on various stories that no one replied to. Mama bustled around in the background, insisting on making her a cooked breakfast even though she’d said she wasn’t hungry. Souta clomped around noisily, calling out to Mama as he tried to find all the missing parts of his soccer uniform and put them in his bag for his game that morning.

Mama slid a plate in front of her and Kagome stared down at the single fried egg on toast as it glared at her accusingly. She deserved to be glared at. She had fought with Inuyasha. She had yelled at him, even after he’d been nothing but kind all morning at her bad mood, hurling her words at him like arrows, aiming to wound. Do you even care at all? Or are you just in it for the sex?! She felt the small amount of appetite she’d had leave her.

The back of Kagome’s eyes prickled with unshed tears, and she stabbed at the egg viciously with her fork, watching the yolk ooze out onto the toast. She should have known things were going too well.

Every few months, her period threw her a curve ball where her emotions got entirely out of whack and she became a paranoid anxious overthinking mess. If it happened when she was working at the theatre and they weren’t too busy, Jakotsu usually sent her home, recognising she wouldn’t be at her best. He jokingly called her mood swings her ‘little demon’ which made some of the youkai members of the crew roll their eyes, but it was true. She felt like an entirely different person when it happened, almost like she was watching someone else use her voice and say things she wouldn’t usually ever say out loud.

It had been so much worse this month, a slowly building feeling of anxiety and paranoia ever since she’d had the Depo Provera shot, wanting to try a birth control that was impossible to forget now she was in a relationship. Her doctor had been asking her to keep a diary of her symptoms, but she kept forgetting, and now look what had happened.

Sometimes Inuyasha said things without thinking. She knew that. He’d just been teasing her. And usually she’d just roll her eyes at him and tease him back, and they’d have a playful argument that led to a tickle fight or something a lot more hands on. But yesterday, she’d taken his words and twisted them. She could see that now. Yesterday, it had felt like her anxiety was looking for reasons to tear the world down around her. That look on his face – she’d hurt him. She had ruined everything.

She loved Inuyasha, even though sometimes he wasn’t the easiest man to love. He was a logical, practical person with a body to die for, who felt safest when he had order and control in his life. It was easy to see he was used to living alone, and sharing his personal space with her still threw him for a loop sometimes. He could be a little grumpy. A little obnoxious. A genuine diamond in the rough who carefully guarded his emotions. He was more a man of action than words, and she could appreciate that. But his sweet nature had been gradually revealed by the caring things he did for her, no matter how gruff his exterior could be sometimes.

She adored him. She’d never dated a hanyou before, and that came with a few extra complexities compared to being with a human, but she had grown to love his youkai traits. The way his ears told her how he was feeling. The way his pupils dilated when he was aroused. The way he took it upon himself to see to her physical needs, wanting to feed her, touch her, care for her. The way he relished how she smelled, how she tasted. He was a much more physical partner than she’d ever had before, and she loved it. How a simple touch from him, a spoken word in that low rumble could fill her with desire. In his hands, she felt cherished, desirable, wanted. She’d always thought she’d had a fairly average libido before, but with Inuyasha… she felt insatiable.

She’d had a couple of girl talks with Inuyasha’s friend Sango about him, and she'd hinted at a troubled childhood without giving any details. After that, Kagome had decided she wouldn’t push him out of his comfort zone before he was ready. He’d probably had to deal with so much growing up, and it was easy to deduce that he found talking about emotions difficult. That was okay, not everyone was good at that, he more than made up for his lack of words with his physical attentiveness and the way he looked at her. She could read the way he felt in those golden eyes.

To her delight, just recently he’d started to share things with her all on his own, just little details here and there, about his Mama or his Pop, family traditions they’d had when he was small, and she’d treated those tiny pieces of information like the gifts they were. And now look what she’d done. He’d probably never share his thoughts like that with her again.

It felt like there was a tight band around chest, making it hard to breathe properly. Her back was stiff from a night of tossing and turning, her lower belly twisted with cramps now that her period had finally arrived, along with a thumping headache that made her head heavy. She hoped the painkillers she’d taken in the bathroom would kick in soon.

The doorbell rang, adding to the family noise in the kitchen, and Souta ran to answer it, a piece of toast clutched in his hand. He was expecting a teammate who was getting a lift to the soccer game with him and Mama, and they heard him call out excitedly from the front room as he opened the door. Her mother sat down at the other end of the table.

“What are your plans for today, Kagome?” she asked absently, stirring her tea.

All Kagome wanted to do was go back to Inuyasha. Touch Inuyasha. Be with Inuyasha. But first they would have to have a Talk. Would he be like her previous boyfriends, and dump her for being ‘difficult’? Kagome sighed and slumped back in her chair. She shouldn’t have run yesterday, but she’d felt like a passenger in her own body, and had been frightened she would say something even more unforgivable than she already had.

Instead of going back to her apartment, she had caught a bus to the other side of the city to her childhood home, rushing in the door to fall into her mother's arms to sob hysterically, and had then taken some painkillers to dull what felt like an oncoming cluster headache and gone straight to bed before dinner.

“My plans? Oh nothing much. Mostly eating humble pie”, said Kagome dejectedly, pouring herself another cup of tea and pushing the impaled egg off to one side with a grimace.

Her mother lifted her head at that and inspected her daughter over the top of her teacup. “It’s going to be alright you know”, she said with a gentle smile, but before Kagome could ask her what she meant, Souta wandered back in, still eating his toast.

‘It wasn’t Kenji, it’s some guy for you, Kagome,’ he said vaguely.

‘Me? But nobody knows I’m here.” Puzzled, Kagome pushed back her chair and went to the door.

And there was Inuyasha. Her heart leapt with joy and the world, which had been dully monochrome and all askew, abruptly righted itself and sprang back into colour, just like the moment Dorothy had opened the door and found herself in Oz.

“Inuyasha?!”

She drank in the sight of him on the doorstep. He was looking more dressed up than she’d ever seen him, wearing an open-necked button shirt and jacket, his hair braided neatly. Even his jeans seemed to have no holes, and his black motorcycle boots looked polished. But otherwise he was indisputably, wonderfully Inuyasha. Her eyes roved over the austere angles of his face, his amber eyes and pointed silver ears, the stern mouth that made her knees go weak, the quiet solidity of him.

She wanted to throw herself into his arms and apologise profusely, but the strained look in his eyes, the tautness around his mouth, made her pause.

“Is everything okay?” she asked hesitantly.

“Fine.” Inuyasha cleared his throat. “Yeah it’s…uh, fine. I just came by because…um, I wondered if you had a balcony”, he finished in a rush.

Kagome’s jaw dropped. She didn’t know what she had been expecting, but it wasn’t that.

“A balcony?”

“Yeah. A balcony. Do you?”

Was this a peculiarly vivid dream? He seemed solid enough, standing there in a shirt and jacket she didn’t even know he possessed, his neatly braided hair revealing every nervous twitch of his ears.

“There’s a back verandah”, she said cautiously, blinking up at him.

“That’ll do. Can we go there now?” he asked tensely. “If you’re not too busy that is?”

Kagome stared at him. “Inuyasha, are you sure you’re all right? You’re behaving very strangely.”

He huffed. “I know”, he said, his hands fidgeting with the edge of his jacket. “It’s just there’s somethin’ I need to do before I lose my nerve.”

“And this something needs to be done on our back verandah?” said Kagome slowly. He nodded.

She stood aside and Inuyasha stepped past her into the house. Maybe she was still asleep, and this was some sort of lucid dream brought on by those painkillers she’d taken last night. It definitely felt surreal. She blinked slowly and pinched herself, but he was definitely still there. Kagome led him down the hall and through the kitchen to the back door, ignoring Mama and Grandpa’s intense discussion about the need to clean out the storage shed, interspersed with polite requests to pass the tea.

“Well, here we are on the back verandah”, she said cautiously, wondering what might happen next. This day wasn’t turning out at all like she thought it would.

Inuyasha looked around anxiously and then gestured towards the old-fashioned swing seat that her father had made for her mother when she was a little girl. The paint was faded and peeling and it listed slightly to one side because the chains hanging from the beams were a little off centre.

“Sit down”, he said as he steered Kagome towards it.

“Inuyasha, what’s going on?” She watched as he walked down the two steps to the lawn and moved to stand in front of her, almost treading on her mother’s petunias, his hands clenching and unclenching.

“Just… don’t interrupt.” He took a deep breath, and opened his mouth. And then closed it again.

“What is it? Can I help?” she asked, twisting he fingers together. Kagome was getting really worried. Had he come all the way across town in his best clothes to dump her and now felt unable to go through with it?

Inuyasha cleared his throat savagely. “Sorry”, he said. “I’ll get it this time.” Another breath and then, to Kagome’s astonishment, he began to sing.

You were meant for me I was meant for you!

Kagome’s eyes blurred with sudden tears. It was unmistakably You Were Meant for Me from Singing in the Rain. His voice was actually quite pleasant, a deep baritone that went off key a little here and there as he hit the higher notes, but mostly rang true. And then, when she thought she couldn’t be any happier, he began dancing! True, Inuyasha was no Gene Kelly, but he was definitely shuffling from side to side and every now and then he even tried a twirl.

Nature patterned you, an' when she was done You were all the sweet things rolled into one!

His expression wasn’t really that of a lover delivering a heartfelt sentiment. It was intent, frowning as he tried to remember the words and coordinate his dance steps. Once he found himself facing the wrong way, and had to turn round hastily and pick up his routine again.

You're like a plaintive melody That never lets me free

And then he was holding out his hand, inviting her to dance with him, drawing her up from the seat and leading her down the steps to the garden.

I'm content, the angels must have sent you And they meant you just for me!

Smiling through her tears, she let him swing her round until he came to a halt with a flourish, looking into Kagome’s eyes at last with a mixture of relief, trepidation and excruciating embarrassment. Even the tips of his white pointed ears were red.

“Inuyasha,” she said, starry-eyed. “You were singing. And dancing.”

He coughed, then smiled at her hesitantly. “I’m not very good, I know. But I-“ She pushed her fingers over his lips to stop him talking.

“That was the best version of You Were Meant For Me I’ve ever heard.” Her voice cracked a little as she stood on tiptoe to put her arms around his neck. “The very best”, she whispered, “and I should know because I’ve heard it a lot.”

He gave her a relieved grin and pulled her close, leaning down for a kiss. But before their lips met, there was a burst of applause from the back door. Kagome’s family, evidently distracted from breakfast by Inuyasha’s singing, were beaming broadly and clapping. Souta whistled.

“Excellent! Very well done!” said Grandpa.

“Kagome’s always needed someone who will dance with her”, said her mother when Kagome introduced Inuyasha to them.

“I’m not really much of a dancer”, he confessed sheepishly, glancing down at Kagome with a blush.

“You looked like you were doing fine to me”, said Grandpa, which just went to show how much he knew about dancing.

Her mother, it appeared, knew more about what had happened yesterday than Kagome had thought.

“I have to admit young man, I had my doubts when you called me yesterday evening. When my daughter arrived here she was very unhappy”, she said, regarding Inuyasha with the severity she reserved for shoppers at the fruit market that squeezed the avocados hard and then put them back. And then she smiled. “But, you seem to have redeemed yourself. Welcome to the family.” Kagome giggled at Inuyasha’s wide eyed expression.

“We don’t like Kagome being unhappy”, her grandfather added. “She was born for laughter.” He broke off as the doorbell rang and her mother clicked her tongue as she checked the time on the kitchen clock.

“That’ll be your friend, Souta. You’d better let him in and then finish getting your soccer kit organised, we need to leave in fifteen minutes.” She turned back to Kagome and Inuyasha with a twinkle in her eye. “If there are to be any more song and dance routines, you’ll have to keep the noise down, I’m afraid, unless you want a larger audience.”

“I think once was enough”, said Inuyasha ruefully. He took Kagome’s hands as her family disappeared. “Was… once enough, Kagome?”

“Yes”, she said, her fingers tightening around his. She knew just how much that dance must have cost him. “Oh, Inuyasha, I can’t believe you did that for me! Especially after yesterday.”

“It was the only way I could think of to tell you how much I love you”, he said softly, stroking back her fringe. “I remembered what you said once about your job. That even though everyone in the company works hard to put a show together, being part of the backstage crew is always faceless because the audience is only there to see the actors shine. I wanted to show you that you’ll always shine like a star to me.”

Kagome’s throat was so tight, she could hardly talk. “Inuyasha…” was all she managed to choke out.

“I love you, Kagome”, he said, his eyes locked on hers. “If you want me to sing and dance for you every day, I will.” He grinned a little, one fang poking over his bottom lip. “You never know, I might even get better at it.”

“You don’t need to do that”, said Kagome, finding her voice at last. Drawing her hands free, she reached up and put them on his shoulders, feeling his strength and his solidity. “You don’t need to dance for me, or sing for me, Inuyasha. You just need to be you. You just need to be there. You just need to love me.”

“Now that, I can do”, said Inuyasha, so obviously relieved that a daily song and dance routine would not be required that she laughed, giddy with happiness. He laughed too and kissed her soundly, lifting her up and swinging her wildly around in a circle. Wild joy surged along her veins, and she wrapped her arms around his neck and kissed him back. The kisses didn’t get too heated, both of them very conscious that they were standing in her mother’s garden and could have an audience at any moment. But the promise of heat was there, and Kagome shivered in anticipation.

“I missed you”, she mumbled at last between kisses.

“I missed you too. You were gone for less than a day and it felt like a year.” He held her tightly, and she leant against him with a great sigh of contentment. “My apartment sounded so empty without you singing in it. I had to leave that damn musical running to fill up the silence.”

“Really?” giggled Kagome, delighted. “So that’s where you learnt the words! And how did you work out the dance routine?”

“Ah.” Inuyasha breathed out a deep sigh. “That was Jakotsu. When you wouldn’t answer your phone, I kinda panicked. Shiori said you didn’t go home, and Sango didn’t know where you were either. I called the theatre to see if you were there, and Jakotsu answered. When he worked out who I was, he made me tell him everything. And when he asked what I was going to do to win you back and I said I was going to sing for you, he said I couldn’t do it without a dance routine too. Made me come to the theatre to learn one. Longest fucking night of my life.”

Kagome giggled even harder. “He probably enjoyed himself.”

Inuyasha rolled his eyes. “He said that if you were prepared to talk to me after seeing the way I danced, you must really love me.”

“He’s right”, said Kagome, standing on tiptoe to kiss him again.

“Now you know why I was so nervous when I arrived. I was terrified I would lose my nerve.”

“I’m glad you didn’t. That’s a song and dance routine I’ll never forget.” Her smile faded. “Seriously, I know how hard that was for you, Inuyasha.”

“I felt pretty stupid. But sometimes, taking a risk and letting go means you can win everything you’ve ever wanted. And I want you Kagome. I want this relationship to work. If you feel I’m taking you for granted, please tell me. I’m sorry I didn’t notice before. I’ve just lived alone for so long, sometimes I forget. I'll make an effort to ask you more about your day, and the very next show at the theatre, I’ll buy a front row ticket. I know I’m not very romantic, but if you like, we could start going out for dinner. I could bring you flowers…”

Kagome shook her head, smiling. “It’s okay. I don’t need flowers. And I don’t need by the book romance. Your dance routine… now that was romantic. All I need someone who’s prepared to take a risk for me, someone who’ll grit his teeth and make a fool of himself to show me that he loves me.”

“And I need someone who’ll make me laugh and push me out of my comfort zone and make me feel”, said Inuyasha, gathering her into him for a long, sweet kiss, then sighing in contentment as he breathed in her scent, nuzzling his nose into her hair.

“So, about yesterday”, he asked carefully. “Are you feeling better today?” Kagome sighed.

“I am so, so sorry about yesterday”, she said. “I started on a new type of birth control, an injection instead of the pills I usually take, and I think it’s not a good fit for me. I’ve never felt that out of control before. I think I need to go back to my doctor and discuss it.”

“Would you mind if I came too when you have your appointment? So I know what’s going on? You really worried me yesterday Kagome", he said seriously, stroking her cheek. "I didn’t know what to do.”

“You would do that?”

Inuyasha scoffed. “Well, it’s not like you’re taking the birth control just for you”, he said, a light dusting of red on his cheeks. “And if it’s makin’ you feel bad, I want to know the right things to do.”

In the garden, a blackbird started to sing, a pure trill of joy. Kagome felt the sunshine on her shoulders and Inuyasha’s warm arm around her, and when she pressed her face into his throat and breathed in the scent of his skin, she thought she would shatter with happiness.

“I think I feel a song coming on”, she whispered, snuggling her head under his chin.

“Yeah?” he said. She could hear the smile in his voice, feel it as he kissed the top of her head. “I don't mind that. Just as long as it’s a duet.”

#mamabearcat fanfics #inukag fanfic #song and dance man #inukag

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wiltking · 3 years

Text

no one asked for this but here’s a brief explanation for every song on my burakhovsky playlist. it includes brief lyric translations and breakdowns.

disclaimer; ive only played classic and i havent completely finished it either. also im not 100% fluent in russian, but i do try my best.

---

yellow love

all i feel is celestial desire a distant joy is dancing all around me all i see is yellow in the spring air how beautifully the color worked itself in

the only track on this playlist that's in english but it was too good to leave out. the most obvious connection is the color yellow - a nod to the yellow tone of areas that have survived infection and become safezones for a day. the comfort of walking through one of those yellow zones and knowing that you're safe, at least for a moment.

it also sets the foundation for a few other songs down the line with the celestial theme - the feverish celestial pull of love.

---

океан // ocean

Ты видишь, что взгляд мой усталый // you see the tiredness in my eyes Мой друг, верни мне покой // my friend, bring me back to peace Мой друг, верни мне покой // my friend, bring me back to peace

i know there is no ocean in the steppe. but if you substitute for steppe for ocean in this context, it works well enough. and if you think about it, a sea of grass is still a sea. and more importantly this song is about a desire for peace. about having no where to go back to but the place you are currently in. and wanting to stay here, forever and ever.

Hо я не вернусь, я весь твой // but i won't go back, i'm all yours

and that part just gets to me.

---

мякоть // pulp (the meat of fruit)

я вырастил сердце на грядке // i grew my heart in a garden надеюсь, оно там в порядке // i hope its okay there я вырастил сердце на грядке // i grew my heart in a garden просил поливать его часто // and asked to water it often

this whole song is a goldmine and i could go through it line by line but to keep it simple i see this song being about the time when daniil inevitably leaves town on gorkhon, goes back home to his dear thanatica, and yearns for the heart he left behind. and he knows he left it there, it was a conscious decision, but it still pains him in a distant way.

и мякоть, и мягкость, и нежность // and pulp and softness and tenderness созрели довольно поспешно // ripen rather quickly но я не тороплюсь его слушать // but im in no hurry to listen to [the heart]

and daniil doesn't regret leaving, he knows it was the right decision because he still has so much he needs to do. but that doesn't lessen the ache. and the yearning for softness and tenderness.

хоть что-то решить - это сложно // to decide on something is difficult я с радостью срезал бы ножиком // i'd gladly sever it with a knife

and when the yearning builds - he feels stuck, torn between two places - the town and artemy, and his studies and livelihood in thanatica. and he almost wishes he could cut all ties. but he can't, because the heart doesn’t deserve to rot or wilt. because its full of pulp and softness and tenderness.

---

рельсы // rails (traintracks)

мы сегодня сонные // we are sleepy today но мы рядом // but we're near (almost there) это должно избавить от яда // this should get rid of the poison

this song connects to мякоть by referring to the destination of a train ride as a garden. in other words, the town on gorkhon is a garden, in which daniil is inevitably returning to. and only once he gets there, will he be able to breathe.

расскажи, кто ты такой, // tell me about who you are почему всегда налегке // and why its always light давай говорить // lets talk на любом языке // in any language

initially i took this as a nod to how you can play the game in russian or english, but after further consideration i like the thought of it meaning that danill eventually learns more of the kin's language, enough to carry conversations in it with artemy.

---

то что рождает весна // what spring gives birth to

Запутался, кто я и для чего создан // confused about who i am and what i was created for И что между нами случилось тогда // and what happened between us then

i think this speaks for itself.

Мы плавно перешли с тобой на «ты» // we smoothly switched to [using the casual pronoun] 'you'

re: this exchange in patho 2:

Daniil: Так что и вы не смейтесь надо мной, коллега. Как вас там… эрдэм. so, don't you [formal] laugh at me, colleague. how are you... erdem? Artemy: Ты проверял?.. То есть… вы проверяли? you [casual] checked? ... rather... you [formal] checked? Daniil: Можно и на ты. Да, проверял. It's okay to use 'you' [casual]. Yes, I checked.

---

рассвет // sunrise

Каменный остров, танцы на костях // island of stones, dancing on bones Сын девяностых помнит, кем не стал // son of the nineties remembers who he did not become Где для него место, где – покой // where is the place for him, where is the peace Это не просто, знать, что мир не твой // this is not easy - to know that the world is not yours

i see this as mostly a song about artemy. about him returning home and coming into his role there. but i also remember when daniil told block that his father wanted him to be a soldier, as well as his Conversation with the Powers That Be. so i think there's some overlap there.

Где для меня место, где покой? // where is the place for me, where is peace? Мне нужен воздух, место и покой // i need air, space and peace.

it’s all about a desire for peace. all of it.

---

дом // home

Отпусти я не буду мешать тебе найти свой дом // let me go, i won't get in the way of you finding your home Давай верить что мы в нем вдвоем // lets believe that we are in it together

Твой путь не легче чем мой / your path is not easier than mine Давай я буду идти за тобой / let me follow you

by this point i think its obvious that i see both daniil and artemy struggling to have a place that they truly feel is home. and after the events of pathologic, they have a lot of work to do as individuals when it comes to building those homes. but as much as they understand that, they still have this connection between them that makes them want to build a home together. and its about the tug and pull of their different paths, which aren't so different after all.

---

по сырой траве // on (along) damp grass

по сырой траве // on the damp grass да босой ногой // with bare feet по услуший земле // on the sleeping earth мы пойдём с тобой // we will go with you

this one is all about daniil following artemy. its about him trusting him. following his guidance about the steppe and seeing the beauty in it.

это ночь без бесаких сомнений // this night without any doubts колыбелью станет для нас // will become a cradle for us нам подарит уюта мгновение // will gift us a moment of comfort мы узнаем любовь в первый раз // we will know love for the first time

that last line just gets to me every time and i dont think i need to say any more. its about the vibe.

---

ускользает // slipping away

Я не знаю, где искать // i don't know where to look Где среди домов в холоде // where among the houses in the cold Где горит твоя молодость // where your youth is burning Не переживай, не переживай, не переживай // don't worry don't worry don't worry Не смотри как // don't look at how Ускользает // its slipping away

honestly i just love this song and wanted an excuse to listen to it more. but i also like to picture daniil and artemy growing old together.

---

родинки // [skin] moles

Я посчитаю родинки // i will count your moles Их больше сотни на тебе // there are more than a hundred of them on you Я заберу тебя с собой // i will take you with me Целоваться до утра // kiss you until morning

this one is just cute.

---

давай?! // let's go?!

Вверх по спирали, // up the spiral К черту все детали, // fuck all the details Все ракеты на старт... // all missiles on launch...

there's no question that this reminds me of daniil's canon ending in patho 1.

Выше и выше, // higher and higher Я слышу как ты дышишь, // i hear you breathing И хочу сказать...// and i want to say... Знаешь... // you know...

В городах, уже правды нет, // in cities there is no longer truth Давай мы улетим от всех?! // let's fly away from everyone!?

so if we're going along the line that daniil has destroyed the town, and he can't go back to thanatica and he has no reason to stay here in the town on gorkhon, and he has utterly no where to go, i like to think that he might have the desire to ask artemy to leave with him.

---

ты моё // you are my

поле, ты моё поле // field, you are my field

more steppe imagery.

душу и сердце моё исцели // heal my soul and heart

self-explanatory

двое, хас только двое // two, there are only two of us мы летнее солнце в осенней груди // we are the summer sun in autumn's chest

two halves of a single whole...and as healers they are the light that shines upon the town during the autumn sand pest pandemic.

---

забери // take

расскажи мне о радости дня // tell me about the joy of day нам бы только успеть до рассвета // we only have time until dawn

я хочу прикоснуться к тебе // i want to touch you [...] забери меня к себе // take me to your place

it's all about the physical intimacy. just a very gentle song that i think they deserve. all of studio’78′s songs have this gentleness to them, as well a very poetic lyrical sense that fits with them so so well.

---

доктор // doctor

когда доктор придёт // when the doctor comes скажите ему, что я уже мёртв // tell him im already dead пускай волнуется, щупает пульс // let him worry, check my pulse душа моя танцем в небе закружится // my soul that's dancing in the sky will spiral

"i'm causing problems on purpose"

---

кавказ / caucasus

к подножью самых южных гор // to the foot of the southernmost mountains я буду нежно целовать // i will kiss you tenderly как будто в самый первый раз // as if its the very first time

i just like to picture them traveling together. that's all.

---

tldr; it’s all about the нежность.

#cringe. but im free

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unsaidmar · 3 years

Text

WC: 2.5k (long winded girl, I know)

Plot: They share stuff and it changes how they see things. Connection ensues.

CW: Mentions of death, illness, hospitals I guess, violence.

a/n: Hello y’all. This is part two of whatever the fuck is going on inside my pea brain. Hope you enjoy.

Part one, the meeting.

Two; It’s better to have loved and lost, than never to have loved at all.

She laughed at the awkwardness of the text and the perfect grammar Dr. Spencer Reid maintained while texting. Ollie made a mental note to care a little more about the phrasing of her own texts, especially considering the circumstances. To say she wanted to impress him was an understatement.

“Good, germs are yucky.” Sent at 7:45 am.

“Also, hi. Good morning” Sent at 7:45 am.

Good morning? Too much too soon? She fell victim to her overthinking for at least twenty minutes after sending her last text, realizing she had to slowly build up the courage to ask about the next time they would be seeing each other, which apparently would have to wait, since Spencer had an inconvenient schedule and could be out of the state in a matter of 20 minutes. Ollie exhaled and stood up from her awful office chair to go and make herself some coffee, hoping to stop her mind from reeling and sending her into her usual never-ending pit of despair and anxiety that came with stepping out of her comfort zone.

A ping echoed in the room and her screen lit up, displaying a text from the one person she had been thinking about. Ollies mother would be crying laughing if she saw the state she was in, positively losing hair over the fact that a cute, smart, witty man was texting her back. A man she had spoken to for the first time not even 24 hours prior.

“I’m a nice person, I’m funny sometimes, I offered him coffee.” She whispered to herself, rationalizing every aspect of their interaction. “That’s how friendships start” She laughed bitterly. “I’m here… freaking… wishful thinking, and maybe he has a significant other… maybe he doesn’t even like women… maybe he just thought I was nice and he thought ‘yay, a new friend’… fuck” she plopped herself back on the chair and threw her head back.

Lia would have known what the right thing to do is, she would come up with a cool thing to text back on the spot, and she resented her absence like she had a million times before. Ollie had gotten used to writing her letters like her best friend was living somewhere else in the world and she would eventually read her friend’s attempt at keeping her updated, which she knew was not healthy and definitely not helping her move on.

The thing is, Lia’s death was not a surprise at all. It was a possibility to the point of actually being expected. She had been diagnosed as a terminal patient for a little over a year before she passed and almost everyone around her had made peace with the fact that she could go any day and that life would have to go on without her, but no amount of grief counseling and encouraging talks with Lia’s family could have prepared her for the unimaginable pain Ollie felt when it happened. She had heard about experiences that made the world turn upside down and how some life events made you go numb and make your legs give weight, but had never come face to face with a happenstance that painful.

She figured she was going to have to carry the burden of her loss till the day she died, and even then, the words “I missed you, till the very end.” would be carved in her grave.

Coming back from her spiral, she remembered how she fell down the rabbit hole in the first place. She took her phone with the intention of texting Spencer back and smiled at how stupid she had been to worry about seeing him again.

“Hey, arrest made successfully. Are you busy right now?” Sent at 7:57 am.

Sighing with relief, Ollie smiled and tried to sound casual with her reply as to not sound like seeing him again was the only thing she had been thinking about.

“I’m the boss, I can un-busy myself. Why? Were you charmed by my Keurig?” Sent at 8:00 am.

Spencer was not the kind to send sassy texts, or any text for that matter. This was completely new to him and he was determined to get it right, so he channeled the Derek Morgan that lived within him and prayed to whatever deity was looking out for him to make him sound cooler than he was feeling.

“I’m a sucker for coffee so, yes.” Sent at 8:05

“I’m a sucker for you, apparently” Ollie nearly screamed at how quickly that came out of her mouth. “Fucking loser, dear God” She shook her head, scolding herself and whatever hamster was in charge of her brain and thought process.

“Mi oficina es tu oficina, then. I’ll be waiting.” Sent at 8:07

Twenty minutes later, he was there, coffee cup in his hands. After what felt like no time at all, they were four coffee cups deep into their conversation and had learned a lot more about each other. Turns out Spencer had a day off after they landed from an away case, he had a thing with germs, his favorite color was purple and his co-workers were more his family than just the people he happened to work with. He liked a bunch of sugar with his coffee and had an eidetic memory that was as much of a blessing as it was a curse.

He was impressed at how this girl was not what you would expect her to be, every aspect of her seemed to make no sense and at the same time, it made perfect sense. This purple haired girl had ADHD and a PhD in history, she was the oldest daughter of two of the most stubborn Mexican immigrants and had a sister that made even the most patient of humans go mad. She loved music, and was not ashamed to admit that her taste in music was far from sophisticated. “I am Taylor Swift’s bitch; I know the words to every single one of her songs! Same goes for One Direction too” She argued when Spencer said that it couldn’t be that bad.

A blaring ring halted their conversation to an unexpected stop. Ollie picked up the office phone with an annoyed grimace and exchanged a few words with whoever was calling.

“Hold that thought, I have to go sign a thingy at the front desk” She dashed out of her office and left Spencer there.

For the first time, he felt compelled to look around and fixate on the details. There were a few old looking pictures and some newer ones with people who looked a lot like her. There was one picture that caught his attention, isolated from the rest like it deserved a spot of its own. In it, there was a red-haired girl that looked around Ollie’s age, one of her arms around her waist and the other one cradling her head that was laying on her shoulder. Ollie’s eyes were closed and the red head looked like she was caught mid-sentence. Stuck to the frame was a little post it note that read “I love you, head ass. -Lia” It looked intimate, they were clearly comfortable with that kind of physical affection, and if Lia hadn’t called Ollie a head ass in the post it, he would have assumed they were together romantically.

Ollie came back in a hurry, apologizing for having to run out like that and sitting back down to resume their conversation.

“It’s okay, don’t worry” Spencer assured her. “I was looking at your pictures, I hope you don’t mind” He said, suddenly very aware of how invasive that could be.

“Not at all, those are there to be looked at” She shrugged, bracing herself for the question she knew was coming. Somehow, talking about Lia with him did not feel as dreadful as it had all those times she was asked about it before, perhaps it’s just him and his calming presence.

Sure enough, he pointed at the picture Lia had framed for valentine’s day and asked, “Who’s that?”.

“That’s Lia, she was my best friend. She is my best friend.” She smiled fondly, something that had never happened before when talking about this specific topic. Maybe sharing Lia’s memory with someone who didn’t know her was different. “She passed away almost a year and a half ago. 468 days ago, to be exact. She was really sick, it was inevitable” Ollie let out a breath she didn’t realize she was holding, reaching for the post it and tracing the words over with her finger.

“I’m so sorry, I can’t imagine how hard that must have been”

“It was… heartbreaking. Even with all that time we had to process the news, it still took me off guard.” She shook her head trying to ground herself. “Anyways, that’s a sad topic. I don’t want to bum you out with it.”

He knew the feeling all too well, he had apologized to several people when he rambled about Maeve, feeling like he had said too much and gotten too personal. He was not about to let this beautiful, vibrant soul feel the way he had for so long. Like he still did, truly.

“Don’t apologize, I get it. You’re not making me sad” He felt like he needed to elaborate to actually convey the message. “I went through the same thing with someone I loved too” he said, looking down at his hands, the very familiar feeling of oversharing creeping in. As he looked up, he noticed the sad look Ollie was giving him, but if the profiler in him was right, she was inviting him to share, not to stop.

“Her name was Maeve. She… she was a geneticist. She helped me through a rough time and she became my friend. It’s a long story…” he looked away.

“I want to hear it, long or not. But only if you want me to.” She gave him the warmest smile she could muster, which convinced him to keep going.

“Um, I started getting some headaches a while ago. I went to a few doctors but none of them gave me an answer. I reached out to Maeve for help and… We bonded, I guess.” He took a shaky breath.

“You don’t have to continue if you feel uncomfortable” she whispered in the most delicate tone.

“No, it’s not that. It’s just… I’ve never told this story before. Everyone in my life that I care about was there to see it.” He said, meeting her eyes so she could see how honest he was being. The man got a hold of himself for a minute, and continued.

“Maeve had to go into hiding. She was being stalked by some woman she met at work. Beyond talking on the phone, we hadn’t even met. I had no idea what she looked like and vice versa. This girl, the stalker… She wrote a paper, and Maeve dismissed it because it didn’t have a good enough foundation. When she started stalking her, she scared her into hiding and eventually started dating her ex-fiancé to try and get closer to Maeve, assuming he knew where she was. They ended up finding her and confronting her. She shot herself and the first person I ever loved. Right in front of me and my friends. The first five minutes I got with Maeve face to face, were the last.”

Baring his soul to a person he had known for a whooping 18 hours was the weirdest thing Spencer had ever done, so unlike himself it was almost funny. But at the same time, he felt like it had to happen. By no means did he believe in fate or destiny, but this one moment made him feel like maybe whoever does believe in that stuff, is not completely wrong.

She was not a therapist. She listened because she was going through a similar thing herself and her interest in Spencer’s loss was not rooted in psychoanalyzing him and helping him cope. She was just a mundane human that did not look at him with condescension and pity, she looked at him like she, too, had found a person who wouldn’t ask her “And, how does that make you feel?” in a monotonous voice. They both knew better than to assume they had all the answers.

“Spencer, that’s horrible. I am so sorry you had to see that. Jesus, fuck. I- “She thought about her next words very carefully. “That’s enough to crush anyone’s spirit” She looked at him like he was turning green. The reason being, he did not look like he was crushed. He had a beautiful smile that shook Ollie to her core, he was easygoing and conversation with him was carefree and it flowed easily. If he had not told her about Maeve, she would not have guessed the man sitting right in front of her was as affected as her.

“How did you manage to get through that?” Ollie questioned, fully intending to take notes.

��I don’t really think I have yet…” Well, time to come clean. Spencer thought. “The whole reason I was here yesterday, and a lot more times before that one, is because she and I talked about this museum. She told me about some conferences she had attended here and we made plans to visit together. Doesn’t quite sound like someone who’s over the whole thing.” He fiddled with his fingers, suddenly too aware of how cold it was. “How did you get through Lia’s death?”

“Yeah, well. I don’t really think I’m quite there either. Not like I’m trying, anyways. I can’t seem to get away from the Grey Roots either” Mental images of two little kids running around with dusty books in their hands came to her and she couldn’t help the small smile she broke into.

“I’m a hopeless romantic at heart, I have always thought that the way Lia and I found each other was pure magic. We met when we were in the second grade, right in this museum, we were on a field trip and we clicked. It was crazy to me that I actually met my best friend at such a young age, and the kind that lasts forever too. It sounds like when people meet the love of their lives on their first try. It sounds dorky, I know”

“It doesn’t. If anything, it sounds like you consider yourself lucky to have loved her like you did. We need more people like that, people that believe in magic.” Spencer reassured her with a shrug. He wished he could believe in cute stuff like that, but he was happy Ollie led a life that made her believe.

“Yeah, but us crazy people, we get our hopes up too easily. Sometimes it hurts.”

“Tell me about it.”

And just like that, in the not so well-lit office of the head Conservator of the Grey Roots Museum and Archive, something in the world had shifted.

#spencer reid x original female character #spencer reid x reader #spencer reid x latina reader #criminal minds headcanons #criminal minds #bau #fluff #spencer reid headcanon

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kissmetae · 4 years

Text

Thoughts with actions

x Taehyung

❧ AU: You’ve been keeping yourself busy lately... a little too busy for your boyfriend’s liking and he starts to get worried about you. After all, he is your boyfriend, you share a bed together and know each other well... well enough for him to be able to tell when you’re stressed ...and when you need his help to calm down...

|| FLUFFY SMUT | 3k | x reader | masterlist in bio ||

❧ Disclaimer: This is fiction. Actions and events in these stories are often exaggerated and to a certain degree unrealistic. Please have this in consideration when reading fiction, especially if it includes sexual content.

❧ Rating: MATURE || sexual content, mention of not eating enough

❧ Smut features: Cuddle-fucking, love making, just comforting and fluffy sex, ‘deep penetration kink’

❧ A/N: For anyone feeling a little stressed or overwhelmed

”Can you stay?” He asked shyly, in a tone almost too quiet to be audible and his lower lip slightly pouting.

His hand wasn’t holding you tight and it would be easy for you to pull away but there was something else than his hand that was keeping you chained.

A part of you wanted to stay... but you had to get going...

The sun wasn't even up yet but you had the idea of getting up earlier than needed to tick more things off of your never-ending mental to do list..

”You want me to stay?”

He nodded, avoiding your eyes.

”I miss you when you’re not with me...” with this his grip of your wrist got slightly tighter.

Your heart was more than fluttering at this point. It was beating hard, pounding almost.

What had gotten into him to be saying these things so suddenly?

You sat back down on the side of the bed and Taehyung’s hand moved from your wrist to your hand.

He struggled slightly to get a proper hold of your hand and you weren’t much of a help, frozen by his small actions.

How long would you be able to handle it?

How long would it be until he broke your bubble...

You lied down on the soft comforting bed with a light bounce.

Usually this action would always follow by the feeling of your muscles relaxing, lungs exhaling and a sense of letting go.

But you barely remembered what that felt like.

Stress, pressure and confusion.

But the worst of it was the fog in your mind called "future".

Sure the concept was exciting but not seeing through the fog was stressful.

You didn't know what to do.

You were moving forward but the view still remained the same.

If it wasn't for the head of messy hair on the pillow next to you, you would've been sinking way past the surface by now.

But he helped you stay afloat, like a pair of floaties. You were still swimming but he helped you make it easier.

The mattress dipped slightly as the messy dark hair shifted to turn around and face you.

"Why are you coming to bed so late?" His deep sleepy voice asked.

"I'm sorry I was-"

He groaned and rolled over so his face buried into his pillow.

"I was ... thinking."

"You know I can't sleep without you." He whimpered and searched for you with his hand.

His hand found you and he wrapped his arm around you tightly, pulling you closer against him in a loving embrace.

"That's better." He smiled softly and rubbed his cheek against your head.

Your body melted into his hold, relaxing and letting him take over some of the tension inside.

"Now tell me what you were thinking."

"It's hard to put it into words" you confessed, caressing the soft skin of his forearms.

"Hmm... then try to describe it as a scene."

"That would make a long movie"

Taehyung chuckled softly, his chest vibrating against your cheek.

His gentle hand moved up and down your back soothingly and his voice was soft spoken.

A loving kiss was placed on your head and he cuddled you closer.

"You know baby, I'm here to take your pain away..."

You nodded, grateful.

"I can make it better."

"Mmm"

"I want to make it better. But, you have to tell me what's bothering you. You're making your boyfriend worried hmm."

He nuzzled his nose over your hair lovingly, humming softly.

His cuddles were like magic...

"It's just.... it's a lot. I feel overwhelmed and confused, like I have a million options and no options at the same time and it's just so confusing because I don't know what to do."

"Oh baby... baby baby. It's going to be ok."

"I don't know..."

"It will. Maybe not now, maybe not tomorrow but you will be ok, all your worries and confusing thoughts in that sweet little head of yours, they will leave and leave room for something better."

"Like?"

"Memories with me." He giggled cutely.

The memories with him were more significant than your worries to be honest, so he had a point.

"But I see you. You're my darling, I see how you feel and I worry about you a lot because I can tell that you've been pestered by a cloud lately and i wish i could capture it and punish it for making you feel this way. Bad cloud! Leave my baby alone!" He swatted with his hand over your head as if to wave away the invisible cloud.

"This is a no cloud zone!" He announced and squeezed you tighter.

"Look at me" He sounded more concerned suddenly.

"If we were to go away on a getaway, do you think it would be a good reset?"

You shrugged.

"It sounds nice..."

"We could do anything we want, no planning and eat good food... and eat properly."

You looked back down at his chest again, knowing what was coming...

"When you're stressed you forget to eat baby and when I start to notice it you need to understand that I'm supressing a mental breakdown of worry for you. You can't do that. I know it's not easy but please please please eat all your meals and every snack you crave. Text me and I'll stop by work and drop off anything you want, I'm here for you. Text me 'baby I want a daim bar' and I'll be in my car on my way with a daim bar and a kiss before you can even say wow Taehyung you're the best boyfriend in the world. Hmm?"

"You're making me crave daim now..." you chuckled and moved closer against his chest.

"Well, then I'll get some for you first thing in the morning. Because you also need sleep my love."

His hand caressed your cheek, angling your gaze back up to meet his concerned eyes again.

"It's going to be ok." He repeated.

His hand continued to caress you soothingly as he spoke.

"You know, asking for help isn't something bad. Especially not from me, because I want to help! I want to be a hero! But not any hero."

"My hero?"

"Exactly! And-"

"You already are." You cut off.

There was a short pause and you looked up to see his big doe eyes looking down at you.

"I want you to feel protected when I'm near."

You couldn't help but smile and feel warm inside.

For the moment he made it feel a lot better. You still needed to talk about it but the distraction he was giving gave you a sense of stability that was different.

"You've had a long day baby, it's time to calm down now. Anything you can't deal with in this moment is officially postponed tomorrow, so don't think about it until then."

You nodded and felt his hand touch the back of your head in a gentle patting.

He was right.

But sometimes it was easier to let go if you were told to. Tending to not listen to oneself is pretty common when you're stressed, the thought is present but the action doesn't connect.

"Ssssh.... relax"

You held your hand in a fist against his chest, feeling protected in ways only he could make you feel.

"You can cry if you need to."

Those words always triggered a tiny wave and you bit your lip to keep it still.

"I'm ok." You whispered.

"How do we make this one fall asleep then? I could sing for you?" Taehyung suggested with a wide smile.

He seemed quite awake too by now.

"I like your voice."

His hand gently collected your hair and with a slow move he allowed the lenght to slide through his palm.

"So soft."

"Sing for me!"

"I'm distracted now." He chuckled.

"Please."

"Are you tired?"

"No..."

"I might have an idea how to make us both tired... if you're down for it of course. We can lay here and cuddle all night if you want to too." He said calmly and repeated his motion with you hair. "I can make up a song for you."

"What's the idea?"

His hand made contact with your shoulder.

With a gentle push you fell to your back and he climbed on top playfully, grabbing your wrists.

He raised an eyebrow suggestively, making you laugh before he got back off again just as fast.

Your heart was beating a little harder from the sudden unexpected tackle but Taehyung was innocently giggling as if it was all but a mere joke.

You moved back onto your side again and moved up to level with his eyes.

His arm quickly wrapped around your waist again as by automatic and pulled you closer to his warmth.

"We can cuddle~" he reassured and kissed your forehead softly.

His nose quickly found your neck and nuzzled softly.

"Or we could cuddle fuck?" He suggested shyly with a sly smirk followed by a quick peck at your neck.

The suggestion was tempting, both in thought and in action... your body reacted with excitement.

"Tempting..."

"Hmm?" He hummed, sending shivers from your ear to your spine.

A decision was easy to make.

You needed him.

You wanted him, he wanted you. Fuck anything else it was all irrelevant at this point and his deep whispering voice only invited you more.

"I've missed you so much.." he pleaded, almost whimpering.

His hand travelled up over your hip to slip under the hem of your pyjama pants.

"I can make you feel so much better baby..."

His hand stopped at the very border of your core and lowers.

"If I may?" He whispered.

You nodded, giving him your consent.

He had you too riled up to even consider stopping at this point.

It didn't take a lot for your body to scream and beg for you to accept his offer... you really needed him more than you thought... not just mentally but physically as well.

His touch wasn't shy.

His fingers immediately moved lower, parting your lower lips and caressing the soft wet area.

"Don't be shy, it's just me." He teased playfully and brushed over your clit followed by yet another kiss of the neck.

Your thighs were clenched as if to hinder him from discovering how you were already getting wet even though he was already aware from the touch...

His other hand grabbed the back of your thigh with a determined grip and pulled it over his hip, thus giving his fingers more access.

He pressed himself closer.

A fingers rubbed gently over you clit, building up tension within you.

His touch was so soft and gentle yet so igniting to your senses. You squirmed and he pulled away.

You could see it in the shift of his gaze... how his eyes seemed bigger and darker with the growing craving of list within him.

With a simple move he pulled down his pyjama bottoms and kicked them off to somewhere under the sheets.

He assisted you with your own and shortly after you were both bare in front of each other... almost.

Your thigh returned to its initial spot on Taehyung's hip when his hand slid up your abdomen and grabbed your breast on the way, giving it a gentle squeeze and proceeding to take off your top.

His hand pressed firmly against your butt, urging you to come even closer.

You did as guided, feeling his hard dick barely brush against your inner thigh.

But the mere touch triggered your core to tighten in anticipation.

His warm loving hand followed the curve of your behind and up your lower back to your waist and his arm squeezed you tighter against his body.

You held him in a clingy embrace, hugging him back and holding on to him as your hero.

His leg moved between yours and you could feel him much more...

How he pressed his crotch against you, causing the length of his cock to slide across your lips, enticing you even more.

Taehyung reached down, wrapping his hand around his thick length and pushed the tip between your lips.

He dragged it up and down a few times before positioning the tip by your entrance.

The gentle pressure triggered you to leak ever so slightly.

He shifted slightly, wrapping his arm around you snuggly and nuzzling his face against your neck again.

With a gentle push the tip slowly made its way in, spreading you apart.

Taehyung groaned.

"You're tight..." he whispered, smirking. "So tight and so warm... I missed this."

He thrusted in deeper, stretching you around his thickness.

You curled your toes. The pleasure was heavenly... the feeling of him filling you up, stretching you wide and making you all wet and turned on.... it was exactly what you wanted and needed right now.

Just him. Just Taehyung.

Nothing else.

With a shaky exhale he thrusted in deep all the way and remained put to allow you to adjust.

Not much time was needed.

Your arousal was making him glisten and you were clenching needily, earning soft moans from him.

"You feel so nice..." he smiled, in utter euphoria.

His hug tightened and he began to thrust in a slow pace....

Half-way out and back in deep, slow and passionate.

It felt cozy.

His cheek rubbed against your jaw like a needy kitten begging to be pat.

You tangled your hand in his soft messy curls and you could feel him relax against you, still thrusting passionately with soft moans.

You knew very well how much he loved to be touched during sex. Anywhere in fact, hand on his back, on his luscious behind or pressed to his chest... but his very favourite was of course tangles in his hair, soothing his scalp and giving him tingles while he was pleasured and pleasuring.

He pushed a little deeper and let out a blissful mix of a chuckle and a groan.

The hottest of its kind...

The rocking rhythm of his hips was soothing but at the same time it felt like a passionate intimate massage that with each thrust sent you closer and closer to the highest cloud.

You let out a long sweet moan for him as your body relaxed more he pulled you even closer (if it was even possible at this point...) making your breasts press firmly against his chest.

"Does it feel good?" He whispered.

"Mmm."

"Talk to me."

"It feels amazing." You confessed, playing with one of his curls.

He pulled back more and thrusted back in a little faster, still pushing just as deep.

Maybe it was obvious, but he had a thing for deep penetration.

He was making love to your body.

Sweet blissful love... and it felt heavenly.

"Taehyung..." you moaned, feeling him brush against your most fragile spot within.

He smirked, finding more pleasure in the sound of his name from your lips.

He sped up furthermore, making the thrusts shorter and harder, causing you both to get short of breath.

His lips pressed against the neck of your skin, placing sloppy kisses and you could tell was nearing his release.

The love making turned into love fucking eventually and Taehyung's hips were hitting harder and harder against your core, building you up dangerously close to your climax.

You were vocal and so was he, panting with whimpering moans and pleading grunts between.

It was amazing.

You really wanted to orgasm...

You craved it so bad....

Taehyung pushed you onto your back and moved up on top of you without pulling out and began thrusting fast and hard.

Your hand found his toned back and caressed his warm soft honey skin in order to hold on.

His attractive grunts echoed by your ear and his hands squeezed your hips tight.

The grunts turned into higher pitched whimpers and the tight knot within felt like it would burst any second.

Your grip around him was tight, holding on for dear life as he fucked you deep and passionately.

His expression was a mix a exhaustion and desperate pleasure.

"I-I'm gonna cum" he confessed, followed by a long moan.

"Cum for me baby..." he begged. "Cum"

He thrusted faster.

You were so close.

You bet your lip, nodding in response to his encouragements when he suddenly pulled out almost all the way and thrusted back in hard and deep, breaking the knot apart and making your muscles tense up tight and hard for what felt like seconds to then release like you were pushed off the cloud.

With the second hard thrust Taehyung released with a loud whimpering groan and a tight hold of you.

You pulsated hard, practically milking him off of every drop of cum but he loved the feeling.

Out of breath he laid his head against your shoulder while you caressed his back, catching your own breathe as well.

You needed this.

The feelings that consumed you shortly after were only begging for being close to Taehyung and to be hugged and caressed.

Taehyung pushed himself up on his forearms and carefully pulled out slowly.

"Fuck, that felt amazing." He smirked, cheeks slightly pink.

He fell to his side next to you and quickly pulled you close against him.

"I won't let you go baby." He ensured.

You wrapped your arm around him and nuzzled your face against his neck.

He smelt so nice.

It was a familiar scent, a home scent, a boyfriend scent....

"You smell so nice."

"Thank you." He giggled and caressed your back.

His nose brushed against your cheek sweetly.

"You smell nice too, you smell like my girlfriend." He smiled, followed by a soft hum.

You felt ready for a nap...

Tired, relaxed and at peace of mind in the arms of the love of your life.

"Just relax baby... I'm right here" Taehyung reassured, sounding a little sleepy and pressing you firmer against him.

Before you began to drift you felt a sweet kiss press against your forehead and you knew you would be able to sleep well this night.

#networkbangtan #taehyung #bts #taehyung smut #bts smut #bts fluff #taehyung fluff #taehyung fluff smut #kim taehyung #tae #taehyung kim #v #bts v #bangtan #kpop smut #kpop fluff

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shinsorokiri · 4 years

Text

UA Idol | Chapter Fourteen

Hitoshi Shinsou x Reader

Word Count: 2,516

Warnings: Language, dense Shinsou and (Y/n) (the usual)

A/N: I literally love the idea of Shinsou as a singer I can’t even right now. I hope you enjoy this chapter, it was fun to write! I also am sorry I got it out like ten minutes late, I have a lot of homework and had to write a whole outline for something as well as this, so it took a teeny bit longer to find the time to upload. I hope you like it, nonetheless, and hopefully I get a moment to breathe soon so I can write all those requests I have! (All the songs I used are listed at the bottom of the post!)

For the duet, the words only italicized are sung by (Y/n), the word only bold are sung by Shinsou, and the words both bolded and italicized are sung by both of them!

───────────────────────────────────

The alarm brought you out of a great dream. But it wasn’t too bad, because the main character of the amazing dream you just got ripped out of was quite literally right in front of you. Well, more like you were literally snuggled into him. And he had you as close as possible. Huh. Maybe this wasn’t too bad. You reluctantly start to wiggle your way out of his arms, before they pull you back into him. “Where do you think you’re going?” you hear his raspy, tired voice say to you, and you can hear the small smirk on his lips. Oh fuck. Oh fuck. His voice. His sleepy confidence. What the hell. How are you supposed to just lay there and not feel things? Luckily, before you even have the chance to respond, there’s some heavy knocking on the door to your little practice room. You hear a soft groan come from Shinsou, which causes you to giggle. You don’t see it because of the dark, but he smiles to himself. He likes making you laugh.

He stands up, allowing the blanket to stay draped over you. You don’t feel all that warm without him next to you, though. He opens the door, immediately squinting and grunting at the bright light that hits his eyes. “Woah, did you two actually get some sleep and not stay up for two more hours practicing the already perfect song I’m sure you have prepared?” Denki says, shock genuine in his voice. “Yes. Did you bring us clothes?” Shinsou asks, rubbing his eyes to try and begin to adjust to the light. “Uh, yeah. Obviously. You two are going to look so good together, Denki and I low-key coordinated your outfits so they look good together but not like they’re matching, oh and by the way, the list of who all is going was put up. It looks like you two, me and Denki, and Kirishima and Bakugo are in the same group,” Mina says, she’s obviously very excited about that.

“Yeah! They did this thing where they have three duets going and then they make the decision to keep or let go of some of them or all of them or none of them or whatever, so that’s fun!” Denki gives a thumbs up, and you stand up, wrapping the blanket around you. “Okay, so when are we going?”

“Oh, uh, yeah about that. We’re going at three. We’re the first group. And you guys are the first to go out of literally everyone. Fun…?!” Mina says, and you and Shinsou both immediately snap out of your drowsy states. You both snatch the clothes, running to your respective bathrooms and changing as fast as possible. Yeah, it was only noon, and you still had sound check, so you had time to prepare but this is some serious shit. You need to be more than 100% if you expect to go further in this competition than this week. Lucky for you, Mina perfectly encapsulated the look of “Falling Cardigan,” so you were actually very pleased with her outfit selection. You walk out of the bathroom, ready to thank her when you see Shinsou. He, too, had on something that worked for the song. How did Denki and Mina do that? You and Shinsou literally told them nothing other than we picked more than one song to sing. Anyways, the wonder was pushed to the back of your mind because the man standing in front of you? Attractive. So, so attractive. So very attractive. In fact, he kind of resembled Harry Styles right now. If Harry had even wilder hair that was indigo and he was constantly tired and Japanese. Point is, he looked good.

“Wow! Look at you two! I think Denki and I did a damn good job,” Mina says, and Denki smirks. “You look like a power couple,” he says and Shinsou punches his arm. “Can you stop saying shit like that?” Shinsou says, avoiding your eyes. “Yeah, people are gonna start thinking we’re actually a couple. When we aren’t,” you say, frowning and looking away from Denki and Shinsou. “You guys do that yourselves, plenty of people already believe y’all are dating, we don’t have to do that for you,” Denki says, smirking at the two of you. Before Shinsou can hit him again, one of the producers runs up to you two and tells you that it’s time to do your soundcheck. You both head onto the stage, and talk to the stage managers, telling them exactly what you want for the performance. They fulfill your wishes and before you know it there are two pianos onstage, set up so you and Shinsou can be back to back. You sit down at one of them, with Shinsou following suit at the other piano. For soundcheck, all the two of you really need to do is play a bit of your soon to be performance and make sure that the piano’s volume and the microphone’s volume with your voices is balanced and everything technical wise can go smoothly. You two begin playing and singing, and the technicians begin working out all the kinks in the sound. And any time you need to stop and let them adjust something else, you both do it no questions asked. The soundcheck for the two of you goes very fast considering how cooperative you are with the technicians, which by the way they really appreciate because normally, the singers just kind of brush them off, but you two are being very professional. And it’s a nice change of pace from the usual type of people they get on this show. Regardless, soundcheck goes very well. Of course, there were a few hiccups on yours and Shinsou’s parts considering you hadn’t rehearsed for a few hours, but all in all it went very well, and the two of you were very excited to perform what you’d created.

The next couple of hours went by very fast, the two of you rehearsing and practicing a few more times before feeling extremely confident, and then being interviewed by the camera crew. “So how does it feel knowing you are the ones who are setting off the duet challenge?” PM asks, and you give a nervous laugh. “Well, I mean it’s exciting, but also nerve-wracking because it’s the first time anyone is ever doing the duet challenge, so yeah it’s intense,” you say, and Shinsou nods. “Of course, we’re going to do our best and hopefully impress the judges enough to get through to the next challenge,” he adds. “I bet the two of you will set the bar high, and don’t worry about the nerves. Having nerves are good because that means you actually care about what you’re doing, so if anything, saying that shows that the two of you are willing to fight to make it to the next round,” PM says, and you grin. You’d never thought of it like that before, but yeah, it makes sense. Why would you get nervous for something that you didn’t care about? Obviously, this was important to you.

After being interviewed, you and Shinsou decided to sit down for a while and relax before performing. He could tell you were nervous, so without thinking, he pulled you into a hug. You calm him down by physically touching him in some way, so he hopes that the same will work for you. I mean, he’s right. Maybe it’s not necessarily his touch, but it’s certainly something about him that just eases your mind. And yes, you’re very thankful. You just want to do well so you can showcase him and not drag him down. If anyone deserves to go through to live shows, it’s Hitoshi Shinsou. “Calm down, kitten, everything is gonna be fine,” he says as you pull away from his embrace. The gentle smile he has on his face tied with the stupid nickname he’s given you tugs at your heart, and you give him a small grin and nod. Damn. Okay, so maybe you liked him? Maybe he’s attractive? That’s not a bad thing, it’s not like its love. Love is the bad thing. Like? Completely different. And acceptable. When you like someone, your feelings for them can go away entirely. That’s not love. And that’s fine. Because love never does anything good for you. It’s a painful chase with painful results, and you’re fine in the romantically loveless life you are living. You didn’t even want to think of this man hurting you. Or of you hurting this man. You’d honestly rather die and love inevitably ends in someone getting hurt. At least your experiences with it have.

“(Y/n)? You’re kind of zoning out, are you okay?” he asks, genuine concern in his voice. “Yeah, yeah, I’m good just… nervous,” you say. And you’re telling the truth. Not only are you nervous for the performance, you’re also nervous for your blossoming feelings for him. Hopefully, they just stay in the “I like you” range and not the “I love you” range. You can do that. You can make them stay there. “Well, if you need anything, just squeeze my hand, and I’ll do what I can to help. I’m nervous too, like PM said, it’s natural for us to be nervous, but if it gets to be too much just let me know. Because I’m here for you.” Fuck, you can stay in the I like you range, just pretend he didn’t say that because that was adorable. “Thanks, Shinsou,” you say, and he gives you a smile before starting to talk about something to distract you from your nerves. What a good fuckin guy.

Before you know it, it’s time for the two of you to perform. He squeezes your hand befor you walk out onstage together, sitting at the pianos that have been arranged for the two of you. In this round, the judges are unable to talk to you or give any feedback, so the two of you just jump right in. You feel him nudge his shoulder with yours, as you’re back to back, and you feel instantly comforted. You then begin singing.

“You’d come back to me,

And you’d come back to me

And you’d come back…

Vintage tee, brand new phone,

High heels on cobblestones;

When you are young, they assume you know nothing…

Forget what I said

It's not what I meant

And I can't take it back

I can't unpack the baggage you left

But I knew you,

Dancin' in your Levi's

Drunk under a streetlight

I, I knew you

Hand under my sweatshirt,

Baby, kiss it better, right?

What if I'm down?

What if I'm out?

What if I'm someone you won't talk about?

I'm fallin' again

I'm fallin'

A friend to all is a friend to none

Chase two girls, lose the one

When you are young, they assume you know nothing

And the coffee's out

At the Beachwood Café

And it kills me 'cause I know we've run out of things we can say

But I knew you

Playin' hide-and-seek and

Givin' me your weekends

I, I knew you

Your heartbeat on the High Line

Once in twenty lifetimes, I

What if I'm down?

What if I'm out?

What if I'm someone you won't talk about?

I'm fallin' again

I'm fallin'

And I get the feelin' that you'll never need me again

Was all we needed

You drew stars around my scars

But now I'm bleedin'

'Cause I knew you

Steppin' on the last train

Marked me like a bloodstain

I, I knew you

Tried to change the ending

Peter losing Wendy, I

What if I'm down?

What if I'm out?

What if I'm someone you won't talk about?

I'm fallin' again

I'm fallin'

But I knew you'd linger like a tattoo kiss

I knew you'd haunt all of my what-ifs

The smell of smoke would hang around this long

'Cause I knew everything when I was young

I knew I'd curse you for the longest time

Chasing shadows in the grocery line

I knew you'd miss me once the thrill expired

And you'd be standin' in my front porch light

And I knew you'd come back to me

You'd come back to me

And you'd come back to me

And you'd come back

And when I felt like I was an old cardigan

Under someone's bed

You put me on and said I was your favorite.”

Immediately after you ended, everyone started clapping and cheering. Of course, you heard Denki and Mina screaming from backstage, and it caused you both to smile as you got up, walking over to where they were. “You two are actually crazy for even attempting that,” Denki says, and Shinsou shrugs. “What artist is entirely sane?”

“Touché,” Denki says, giving him a finger gun before he and Mina walk out together onstage. “You did really, really good,” you say to him and he grins. “You did better. I thought you were actually about to start crying, not gonna lie.”

“No way, I thought you were actually gonna start crying!” He chuckles, shaking his head at you while you smile at him. “Guess that means we killed it?” he suggests, and you grin. “I guess so,” you say, and he smiles at you. “I didn’t know those two song would sound so good together! That’s crazy, how did you guys figure that out?!” Kirishima whisper screams to the two of you and Shinsou shrugs. “I was playing the piano for Falling and (Y/n), being the genius that she is, started singing Cardigan. It just kind of… flowed after that.”

“Yeah, well I can’t even pretend it wasn’t fucking good and cool. Good job, losers,” Bakugo says, his arms crossed while Kirishima is beaming at the two of you. How… was their relationship even real? You were pulled out of your disbelief when you heard Denki and Mina start, and whew, the mood went from wow I’m sad to wow I’m horny in .5 seconds flat. They did extremely well, as expected, and then Bakugo and Kirishima go, and their voices are just heavenly together. Not to mention how cute it was that they sang Iris by the Goo Goo Dolls. Altogether, your song tones went from heartbreak, to horny, to pure love, and that is just… hilarious. The six of you were then instructed to go onstage while the judges made their decision. It took… barely any time for them to speak to each other before they all turned to you. “This may be the easiest decision we will make today. All six of you did an amazing job. And Shinsou and (Y/n), we’ve never seen anyone do what you did in this entire competition. Ever. So good job there by making yourselves stand out while also performing a song that’s already come out,” Keigo says, and Midnight grins. “All six of you are going onto the next round.”

───────────────────────────────────

Song list:

(Y/n) & Shinsou | Falling Cardigan - Harry Styles & Taylor Swift (CosmicMashups on YouTube)

Mina & Denki | break up with you’re girlfriend, i’m bored - Ariana Grande

Kirishima & Bakugo | Iris - The Goo Goo Dolls

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the-sunshine-dims · 4 years

Text

life sucks when there's no cuddles (chapter 2)

okay so i have made a dumb decision to make a third part as well and then the series shall be completed (hopefully)

words: 2535

chapter 1 | chapter 3

ao3 link

contents and warnings: touch starved Janus, Patton wants to receive and give all the affection, platonic moceit, being overly on guard, miscommunications, hurt/comfort, crying, yearning mention, virgil/roman/remus/logan mention,

___

Patton rubbed his eyes tiredly as he woke up, his head was lazily resting on his arms which ended up resting on his desk due to an impromptu nap. he was happy and proud he had been very productive for Thomas, But he was still pretty tired because pro tip falling asleep on you desk sucks, especially after working (in his opinion) quite a lot so his limbs already were tired from writing stuff down, and he intended to ask someone if he could have a cuddle pile and potentially watch a movie with them because he wanted to rest somewhere and with someone comfortably, he didn't want to just fall asleep on his bed, he was happier being around people he liked, and also, his room felt all stiff and boring right now, and while it was probably since he had been working seriously, he still didn't like it and didn't want to remain in it.

He paused his thoughts before trying to decide who he was gonna ask for affection, wanting to decide before standing up. maybe Virgil? Virgil was nice and especially after the stressing week he needed to rest- but he was touch adverse a lot of the time after stress inducing things.

Logan? He was nice and just kinda let Patton lounge on him and he was comfy and allowed Patton to play with his hair sometimes as long as it was quiet enough for him to read as Patton did so, but.. same with Virgil he was rather touch adverse a lot of the time after stressful stuff.

Roman was left, he loved roman, he was nice and Patton got to hear him talk about his projects and Disney stuff and just stuff he was excited about and it was so nice and he got to lay in Roman’s lap.. but of course Roman most of the time goes on quests after a stressful time or if he just had to stay in the same place too long and he wants to stretch, so definitely not free since he wouldn’t even be in his room and he’s out in the imagination.

And he doesn’t really want to ask Remus because In the nicest way possible he’s not the most comfortable with him, at least not yet, and he doesn’t want to bother Janus- but oh wait Janus might be free! And he hasn't seen him in a while, so maybe Janus would be willing to hang out with him?

He cheers up instantaneously from the disappointment of not being able to ask the others before realizing that Janus always seemed really stiff in hugs and he seemed he might've been a little uncomfortable when sleepy Patton made grabby hands for him to cuddle, so maybe he doesn’t like physical affection- but! He could still.. possibly ask him if he wanted to watch a movie and hang out with him, and that way he won’t feel uncomfortable in a hug or anything and Patton still gets company from the people he enjoys, and later once Logan and the others are all rested up maybe he can plan a proper movie night for everyone! And he could hang out with Janus again and his other friends and he could get all the love, at least if they're comfortable with that.

He happily stands up before sinking out to the outside of Janus’s room, after a moment he knocked happily and after another moment or two, a kind of tired, apprehensive looking Janus opened the door.

Patton smiled, if tiredly, but he made sure to muster up all his energy before speaking, “heyo kiddo! would you want to watch a movie with me? You can choose which movie we watch!” He told him. fighting back a yawn, he had a vague suspicion that he wouldn’t make it through the whole movie before falling asleep.

Janus seemed to be thinking about it before he went “what about the others?” in his honeyed but for some reason tiniest bit nervous voice,

Patton shrugged “I don’t think they’d be able to, but it doesn't really matter, I like hanging out with you and it gives me an opportunity to, so I’m happy!” Patton grinned again.

Janus nodded “..okay, if you want me to, I’ll come.” He told him, and normally Janus didn’t seem this nervous, did something happen while they were all holed away? He hoped Janus wasn’t sad!

Patton smiled though at Janus's response and resisted grabbing Janus's hand, after all Janus appeared to possibly be uncomfortable with the little gestures and he didn’t want to overwhelm or upset him, so he just offered him a smile before going “okay! I’ll go get the TV set up and grab some snacks, come to the living room when you're ready!” and waving and then promptly sinking out, which he’s gotta say is exhausting and he should not be doing it in his already exhausted state, but it was whatever and if he was actually going to stop for a time was anybody’s guess.

He quickly grabbed some snacks for them from the kitchen once he rose up into the living room and grabbed a couple blankets and just got set up in general, though he didn’t make any move to find a movie yet, he waited for Janus to say what movie he wanted to watch since Patton did say he could choose because honestly Patton might end up falling asleep and Janus shouldn’t have to watch a movie he doesn’t like while Patton's asleep.

After a couple minutes of waiting after getting everything ready, Janus emerged, shifting uncomfortably as he stood around, kind of like Virgil did before Thomas and the others accepted him, that comparison kind of actually scared Patton. after another moment Patton motioned to the couch in silent invitation, which Janus took up and sat down on the other end of the couch, honestly Janus seemed to of devolved from his usual façade, even as he sat down he was holding himself nervously and was- well he was reminding Patton so much of old Virgil it was concerning, he didn’t want to intrude on asking if something happened though, they weren't really close as friends yet, but he did want to let Janus know he was there for him somehow.. he took a small unnoticeable breath before turning to Janus and asking “which movie would you Like?”

Janus thought about it for a moment “what about the greatest showman? It has good songs, though the showman is an awful person,” He said, the first bit hesitantly, and while he himself knew the reason why he was being like this (though he thought it wasn’t as noticeable) was because he was making sure to be on guard as to not blurt out anything or accidentally say something that would either beckon questions from Patton or make him concerned, though he was failing at not making Patton concerned,

Because, Patton though, Patton didn’t know, he didn’t know one bit, and he was worried for Janus, he had never seen Janus act like this and he just seemed constantly nervous and he didn’t really know what to do, after all, Janus may not even want to talk to Patton about it.

Patton gave Janus a small smile as he turned the movie on, getting comfy and offering Janus a blanket and he didn’t know why but as Janus accepted it from Patton’s hand he seemed to give a small longing look, and Patton didn’t know if he had misread the look or something else because what could he be yearning for?

He didn’t know, and he doubted thinking about it would come any good so he just discontinued thinking about it, but one of the things he instead thought of was that Janus was so comfy and Patton wanted cuddles- but then he had to internally scold himself once again because he didn’t want Janus to be uncomfortable with Patton because he didn’t like cuddles or hugs, Janus deserved to have his boundaries respected after all.

After a moment he just began cozying up into the couch, and, deciding that Janus’s presence really was comforting, even just having him there, as the seconds went by he started getting sleepy and his eyelids grew heavier, though he kept his eyes on the screen, and honestly yeah he had to admit just being in the same room with Janus made him happy and content.

And honestly no one could blame him for when he just.. rested his eyes for a minute, and then promptly fell asleep.

Janus noticed and after carefully checking to make sure Patton's back wouldn’t hurt when he woke up and he wasn’t cold, Janus just quickly began paying full attention to the movie that was playing again, semi-contently sitting back into the couch, happy to listen to the beautiful songs and choreography.

—-

It was maybe a half hour or so Later when Patton woke up, though he didn't know, it could’ve been a full hour, but Patton knew some time had indeed passed as he woke up placed to lean back on the couch and not slouch forward on the couch arm,

He also knew some time had passed because Janus was crying.

And from the look of it he was unaware of it, just zoned out and seemingly captivated by the screen with tears running down his cheeks, and after a paralyzed moment of just.. staring at Janus, he lurched forward, “what happened? Is something wrong? Do you need anything?” He asked in abrupt, sleepy concern, though he felt himself waking up more at just the sight of poor Janus crying.

Janus just pointed shakily to the screen (in which one of the scenes where charity and Barnum were hugging and just being happy before Barnum was a trash human being) and just shakily mumbled out “I want that” And while even Janus himself doesn’t seem to really realize he’s crying or even saying these things, maybe he hasn’t slept in a while either- but regardless, even if Janus can’t seem to notice, Patton can, and Patton does, Patton notices how Janus’s voice is filled with sorrow and just nothing short of pain and how it becomes cracked from tears.

And Patton's vision flickers to the tv, which he notices is paused, but he doesn’t seem to really get it just yet, just asking again, softer, “what do you need, hun?” He said, trying to coax out Janus because it seemed if it was enough to make him cry then it wasn’t something he wanted but rather something he indeed very much needed and he wanted to see if he could help out the scaled side.

Janus just seemed to sob a tiny bit louder, which in turn shocked himself for a second because he didn’t realize he was being as loud as he was (though the others fortunately couldn’t hear) and after another second he seemed to finally process he had both been crying and that Patton caught him crying and wanted to help.

Which part surprised him more was anybody’s guess, but after a moment though he just started sobbing more, now incredibly embarrassed but also just not knowing how to stop in the moment and he tried to speak and communicate with Patton nonetheless despite his nose and eyes being red and despite him being miserable from the sobs racking his body “I- i want- I’m sorry I just I want- I haven’t had a hug in so long-“ he stammered out after a lot more effort than he would’ve liked to admit.

and despite Patton's growing confusion he didn’t waste a second in lunging forward and wrapping up Janus in his arms, feeling as Janus went stiff but ultimately ended up melting into a puddle against Patton, hiding his face in Patton’s shirt as he tried to stop crying, he didn’t know why but he couldn’t get himself to stop crying, he didn’t know if something in him had just broke and never wanted to be put away again or what, because while Patton's soft murmurs of “it'll be alright i know it might not feel like it but i promise it will,” did help it definitely didn’t stop it completely like Janus would’ve wanted.

After maybe five minute Patton pulls away slightly- and after seeing how instantly more distraught Janus is once he does he makes sure to still have a grasp on Janus for Janus’s comfort before he sat down against the couch more comfortably, because unfortunately while Patton would want to sit with Janus and give him all the affection the way they were hugging hurt his knees and they were slowly going numb so he settled into the cushions contently, so after getting his legs from under him and making sure they wouldn’t cramp he gently pulled Janus back into his arms and just let Janus melt all over again as Patton held him securely.

And then, Janus continued to just sob into Patton's shirt, and Patton still doesn’t know why necessarily, having only gotten pretty vague small hints and explanations by a tearful too-upset-to-really-communicate-effectively Janus, but regardless he holds him and after a moment of realizing Janus needs to get this out he just makes sure Janus feels safe as he cries and once the tears finally seem to end Patton quickly summons a bottle of water and opens it for Janus so if Janus’s limbs did feel strained from the exhaustion of those emotions all he had to do was hold it, which he did, and he quickly took a big couple gulps before just laying back in Patton's arms again, obviously utterly exhausted, and Patton decided that they both needed a nap so he took the water and set it down before setting up pillows and grabbing blankets and just, getting ready to rest while also making sure Janus was comfortable,

It took a couple minutes but Patton was able to get comfortable on the couch with Janus curled into his chest, and the two were able to rest, and luckily Janus didn’t seem to be too opposed to the idea of a cuddly nap.

and when they both woke up if Janus was up for it they would talk, and Patton would make sure Janus was okay, or at least better then before, and hopefully get Janus to go to either Patton or someone else for comfort or just cuddles, so he had moral support and care because Patton was really concerned for his newer friend.

And with that semi-planned plan in mind he closed his eyes and allowed himself to fall asleep once again, happily giving Janus cuddles as he indeed fell asleep and within minutes Janus followed in suit, practically using Patton as a pillow as he fell asleep on Patton's Chest, content and warm, honestly Janus didn’t really expect this to be the result when Patton asked him to watch a movie with him but he was fine with it regardless, he may not have loved the crying bit but it turned out more alright then he really expected it would’ve and he was content.

#ts patton #ts janus #ts roman #ts virgil #ts remus #ts logan #patton sanders #janus sanders #thomas sanders #moceit #platonic moceit #sanders sides #touch starvation #touch starved janus #hurt/comfort #miscommunication

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zankivich · 4 years

Text

Corona Diares pt 2: An Arrangement Sequel

a/n: Hello. Something must be in the air. OR, you’re all trapped in your houses and paying my pics more attention than when I actually wrote them lol. Either way I felt inspired to write this and would LOVE to point out that I planned this entire chapter out before the the S + C bullshit was even a thing. I quite enjoy this. I love talking about mental health. It’s so serious and so underrepresented and so poorly represented. I wanted to show a black woman dealing with it and one way, not the only way, that a partner can be supportive during that. If you like it let me know. And if you have ANY ideas for this series please please please share them with me because this was the last idea I had. K bye!

WARNINGS: Depression, discussions of mental health, a very worried husband just wanting to love his wife

*Shawn’s point of view*

After the first month, he notices a change. When they can no longer go out to the store to shop anymore and have to get everything delivered. No more throwing random things at her to build dishes around. When she can’t go to get her hair done, or go on friendship dates with Ti. She gets a little down, not as energetic and bubbly as is her nature. Even the level of sass she seemed to whip at him with incredible comedic timing was at odds. It’s not that he’s not enough for her, it’s just that all the other parts of her life outside of him seem to dry up. There’s not much managing to do, beyond giving their artists a break. Her world domination halts when the world does. And what he’s left with is a rare and devastating vision. A depressed y/n.

At first he’s not super concerned. The whole world was turned upside down. They were witnessing history on a day-by-day basis. Who wasn’t a little sad?! At first, she just takes a little longer to get out of bed. So, he cooks them breakfast after his morning workout. But then she starts to zone out for shorter and then longer periods of time. One day he notices that for an hour during a movie, she just stares out the window. Barely blinking. Never moving. Just sat still. And then come the naps.

“Babe, I have a headache. I’m gonna go lie down for a little while, okay?” She murmured, placing her hand on his shoulder as she stood up.

He peered up at her with concern.

“Of course. You want me to make you some peppermint tea? We can watch movies in bed if you want. I’ll rub your back.”

She smiled a smile so small it barely touched her face. It was nothing like the beautiful wide-toothed grin he fell so deeply in love with.

“You’re incredible, but I think I just need to lie in the dark for a little while. I’ll feel better and then we make some fresh gnocchi for dinner.”

Her gnocchi was one of his favorites. So, of course he nodded and kissed her fingers as she slipped away. He tried his best to stay quiet the rest of the day, sticking to the other side of the house as he played guitar, or video games, or piano. As the day grew later, he went about prepping the potatoes for the gnocchi. He cleaned, scrubbed, and pierced the potatoes before placing them in the oven to bake. He even went about setting up the pans, olive oil, salt. Anything they might need. He grated the parm himself.

When the potatoes had but about ten minutes left to go, he finally made his way upstairs. Their bedroom was dark, the light outside the hallway even turned off. He flicked it on as he stepped quietly inside on raised toes. She was on her side of the bed curled up in the entirety of their comforter. Her bonnet was missing, something he wasn’t sure he’d ever seen before. He wasn’t nervous yet though, so he just assumed it had fallen off in her movement.

“Sweetheart. Hey, I went ahead and got everything prepped for dinner. I thought we could listen to some records while we cook? Maybe open a bottle of wine if you want.”

Her eyes opened. And she looked near him. But she was completely and utterly away. Like her body was a shell and she’d fallen within the depths of herself, hidden away and unwilling to come out. She took one look at him and shook her head before rolling to the otherside of the bed.

“I can’t.”

“Oh...Okay. Well how about I do the cooking, give you a little more time to rest. I’ll come get you after.”

“No Shawn I...I can’t.” She whispered.

This is where the worry started to creep in. Let’s just say he was very good at worrying.

“What is it? Is it your head still? Maybe you should take something.”

“I just...You gotta leave me alone for now, okay? I need to sleep.”

And that was where things started to shift. Because she sounded broken. Not sick, not hurt, but just absolutely broken. Like she might cry if he asked her again, might completely break down and never come back to herself. The most surprising piece of this new territory that he found himself in was that...she didn’t want him near. In a relationship where every pain, every fear, every insecurity thus far had been comforted, if not cured, by the presence of the other, for the first time in his marriage, his wife wanted to be away from him in the midst of her sadness. This was a phenomena he knew nothing about how to manage

He goes back to the kitchen and busies his hands with gnocchi, in part because he had nothing better to do, and in part because he thought he might freak out if he didn’t. Silly him for thinking the concentration on the physical could do anything to silence his mental. At first he wondered if it might be the virus, and that was a terrifying thought all on its own. y/n had made it clear from the jump that their celebrity would not be an excuse for privilege in the face of death caused by oppression. They had not been tested for the virus when half the industry had without symptoms. Even in Canada where healthcare was far better, she was more concerned with donating to others. But she wasn’t exactly showing symptoms, and she didn’t really seem sick. More than anything he couldn’t shake the loneliness in her eyes. Like he could hug her for hours and it wouldn’t make a bit of difference. That wasn’t a virus. That was something else.

So as the fear of the virus hitting the love of his life ebbed, what remained in its place was a sort of terror about the unknown. And he tried to be positive, tried to imagine the next morning when she’d come bounding down the stairs singing a song beneath her breath and looking for eggs for breakfast. However, Shawn couldn’t shake the idea that his wife was experiencing something new entirely, something that she herself may have never navigated before. And he simply may have no idea how to help her out of it. He was scared shitless.

*Three Days Later*

She hasn’t left the room once. In the middle of day two he had insisted on taking her temperature. She wasn’t even ninety-eight degrees. No dry cough. No trouble breathing or wheezing or anything. She was physically fine in the technical sense. But God was she far from fine. On the third day, he was so terrified he didn’t know what to do. So, he reached for the blanket and tried to wiggle it away from her. The result was catastrophic. She just absolutely fell apart. She cried and cried and cried until her cheeks were soggy, until her eyes were red, and all she could do was stare at him in helplessness.

“Why? Why are you doing this to me?” She cried at him.

He had never seen her so quiet. So timid. So dull. It was everything that she wasn’t, and it shook him to his very core.

“Please. Y/n I love you so much. Y--You’re scaring me, sweetheart. I just want to help. You’ve been lying in bed for three days now and I’m trying to help. Just tell me what you need, and I’ll fix it okay? I need you to tell me what’s happening.”

She shook her head and rolled onto her back, legs curled awkwardly beneath themselves. He sees a tear pool on the apple of her cheek and then spill over and down the side of the face he hadn’t kissed in days.

“Don’t you understand? You can’t fix it. They’re dying Shawn. They--they’re gonna die.”

“Who’s gonna die?”

Her face crumpled then and she covered her mouth as a sob let loose that cracked into his chest and tore open his own heart.

“All of those people. Who can’t afford to stay home from the restaurants, from the grocery stores. The people who got fired and can’t afford rent. The people without homes, without safety nets. They’re gonna die. Because we allowed them to. Because we created a system that needs their death to remain sustainable. They’re gonna die. And then we’re gonna die. And it’s all gonna be for nothing. The protesting, the political statements in interviews, the canvassing door to door. It will mean nothing under eradication.”

This wasn’t pessimism under a patriarchal, racist system. This wasn’t y/n on her soap box complaining about the white man, or teaching him about the intersections of oppression. This was something different entirely. This was like watching the love of his life suffocate. He was literally watching her worry herself into a frenzy.

“Y/n, you have to breathe. You’re not breathing.” He mumbled crawling deeper into the bed to get beside her.

She shook her head vigorously back and forth, the tears pooling into puddles on their bed.

“I can’t--I can’t see my way out of it. It’s like... it’s crushing me from above and below. Like I’m sandwiched between it. T--there’s no light. There’s nothing.”

“Okay, okay just uh--give me a second to think...Can I lie down next to you?”

She shrugged more than nodded, but he took it for what it was and crawled in next to her. His thumb wiped at her cheeks, chasing away the tears as she worked to breathe. Her chest rose and fell in rapid succession. And all he could do was reach out and place his hand slowly over her heart, his lips falling to her ear. Everything was measured, intentional, because he didn’t want to scare her anymore.

“I used to have panic attacks as a kid. Listen to the way that I breathe. Try to match it. Don’t focus on getting it right, just do your best. I’m right here, okay?” He whispered. “Your body knows how to breathe. You just have to remember.”

He took a few deep breaths, slowly in and out against her ear. Her heart was hammering, and he knew that before they addressed the existential dread, he needed to calm her heart down. He was glad that in that moment her hand wasn’t on his chest, because she might feel the way that his heart beat just as fast. He was terrified, not of her, but for her. He knew this was the “in sickness and health” part of the deal, and more than anything he just wanted to be good to her. He didn’t want to see her suffer. So despite the crippling fear of getting it wrong, of saying the wrong thing, he had to try. He’d do anything for her.

“Find something to focus on.” He offered still breathing in and out in exaggerated slowness. “I--It can be the ceiling, or anything really as long as it’s not moving. Sometimes it helps. You’re doing good. It’s gonna be okay, babe.”

At first she just flounders. Y/n was a woman good at most things with an ease and precision that could make him feel insecure at times. In this moment though she just couldn’t seem to get the hang of it no matter what she did. Every moment she didn’t succeed only seemed to ramp her heart rate up further.

When she chooses to look at him, to use him to focus, he almost cries. But instead he smiles at her. And he keeps breathing with her. And slowly, slowly, slowly, she floats back down to him. And she sort of just collapses on his chest in a mangled heap. He wouldn’t have it any other way.

“It’s okay.” He whispered kissing at her hair. “I’m right here, my love.”

And she falls asleep again there. With him holding her. He’d rather it be that way. He can only hopes she feels the same

***

He puts out a call on instagram and twitter. He doesn’t name names, but he asks some of his friends if they were experiencing anything like y/n, or if they knew how to help loved ones who were. The next day, he lets her stay in bed just because it breaks his heart when she cries. And also in the hope that he could do a little digging to get her some help.

He’s on an instagram live playing guitar and staring off into space with a blunt in his mouth when the chat starts going crazy.

“What’s going on guys?” He asked, reaching to scroll past the words.

He just kept seeing the words GAGA over and over again. In hindsight it may have been obvious, but he was a bit of a dumbass...and stoned.

“Gaga? What does that stand for? Is that some sort of internet slang I’m already too old to understand?”

He pulled the phone closer to his face and finally saw someone who said: No dumbass. Lady Gaga is in the chat and she wants to speak with you. Woops.

“Holy shit.”

It takes him honest to god ten minutes to figure out how to get her into the video. His fans make no qualms about laughing at him while he does it either. Eventually she’s there and it’s like the first human connection he’s had in days. And he can’t quite explain it but there’s a part of him that wants to cry.

“Hello Lady! I hear you like to be called Lady, is that okay?” He asked.

She smiled through the tiny image on the screen and gave a slight nod.

“Lady is perfectly fine. Your wife calls me Lady all the time...Actually she likes to call me lil Lady. She’s the only one who gets to call me that though.”

“Sounds like her. I’ll stick to Lady then. H--How are you doing right now? Thank you for joining me here.”

“Of course, of course. You know I saw what you posted on twitter the other day and I’ve just been thinking about it so much. I wanted to give it some genuine thougth before I responded, and then I saw you were going live, so I thought I’d give it a shot.” She explained. “It’s hard isn’t it? I’m healthy and I’m safe and I can take care of my family, so I’ve got nothing to worry about. But uh people are dying. And people don’t have the same resources we have, so I just kind of feel like a piece of shit most days. Like I gotta do something ya know?”

He takes a breath so deep it stuns him a little. His fingers still on the guitar and he just looks up at the ceiling and nods. She gets it. Maybe better than he does. Definitely better than he does.

“I do. My uh--y/n. She said the other day that it’s like we allowed it to happen. We as in society, the big ‘we’. And we did in a way. It’s in who we vote into office, who we confront about their world views, who we question and who we don’t. It kind of feels like a culmination of what a lot of us have been saying for a long time. And nobody would listen. Nobody would change. And so this is the card we’ve been dealt.” He sighed. “But you’re right. It’s not gonna be me, or you, or any of the assholes in office. I--It’s gonna be the people we were fighting alongside the whole time. The people without a fanbase, or the ability to write a check. So what the fuck do we do?”

It’s the wildest thing. He’s talking to Lady Gaga, but she’s got no make up on and she’s sitting cuddled up on her couch in glasses. And he’s at home in his studio. The only place where he makes sense. And they’re talking through the hurt together. It’s a collective hurt that seems to permeate through the screen. But at least they can wrestle with it together.

“I think we have to be willing to put ourselves on the line. We got to stand up and offer what we can, because it’ll always be more. And not like the bullshit sing a longs ya know? Like dollars, and pushing of the political agendas, and more dollars. That’s only way we get out of this, all of us, together.”

She’s kind of a genius. The way she spoke reminded him of y/n and the way she would talk sometimes. It was the kind of way of speaking that made you know she could change the world. And it only hurt his heart all the more that she was in such a space.

“Can I ask you a mental health question?”

“Oh of course?”

“I know that you’ve been open with your own experience andI guess I was just wondering… well first how you’re doing in this moment? And then I have someone close to me who’s really struggling under the weight of all of these things we’re talking about. And I don’t really know how to help them, but I really want to.”

She took him seriously which was nice and listened empathetically in a way that didn’t make him feel so alone.

“Absolutely. You know it’s--it’s hard to get out of bed some days. And some days I don’t. For me personally, channeling my energy towards finding funding and aid for people has been helpful. I’m an italian girl so I want to fix shit immediately ya know?” She giggled. “So I’m doing okay today, and I’ve learned to be happy with where I’m at, to try not to push myself towards something I don’t have. Is your loved one okay?”

He could feel the part of himself that was being pulled towards the stairs to get to her. He could still remember the whine she let out when he asked her if she wanted to shower that day. His heart hurt for her and because of her, as it belonged to her.

He shook his head softly and she frowned back at him.

“She--They haven’t gotten out of bed in four days now. N--not really eating. Cries a lot, and they’re really not a big crier. I just wanna make it better, but I guess I don’t know how.” He mumbled. “It’s hard to tell ‘em it’s gonna be better when it feels like that might never happen ya know?”

She nods and suddenly it’s like a huge therapy session for him, which only makes him feel a bit more like a piece of shit. But he’d do anything if it meant she felt better.

“Let me guess. You tried giving her space? Thought maybe she’d snap out of it?”

He gets the feeling she knows exactly who he’s talking about it and the pretenses sort of melt away.

“Yea. It’s kind of driving me crazy though. We’re not really the distance type.”

“Of course.” She smiled. “I can’t really explain what’s going on in her head. It’s different for everybody. What I can offer is only a suggestion if what’s currently happening isn’t working. Just go lie next to her. It might not be today. It might not be this week, but there are moments in and out of it--kinda like a fog? And in those moments of clarity, Shawn? There is nothing worse than finding yourself alone. I can promise you that.”

He nods, hanging onto every word that she speaks. In all honesty the genius of women had never gone unnoticed to him. It was a part of what always made him realise what an idiot his father was.

“Look, still get up. Work out. Shower. Eat. But when you can...be there. And let me know if that helps. In the meantime I think I’ve got a bit of an idea, would you mind if I sent you something?”

“Absolutely. Send away.”

The second the livestream ends he makes his way upstairs. She’s sat on his side of the bed this time, which makes him wonder what’s going on in her head. It’s clear that she’s awake, so he climbs in slowly after her. But this time he doesn’t press, doesn’t beg, doesn’t coax. He simply goes back to plucking at the strings of his guitar. And the reality is that nothing happens. He honestly doesn’t know if he helps even in the slightest. But he’s there. And that’s all that he could offer. He just hoped it was enough.

***

Day six she snuggles into his side for the entirety of Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets. She’s asleep, but it’s a win.

Day seven she lets him open the curtains for a while.

Day eight she asks him if they can take a bath. He gets a little overzealous. Pulls out the bubbles and the bath salts and the bath bombs. In the end, when she takes her bonnet off for the first time, her curls are flattened and stuck together. He asks if he can wash it for her. She pauses but tells him she’s afraid she won’t be able to get out of bed again to rinse out a deep condition. So they make a deal to sit in the tub long enough for the conditioner to penetrate, and then he rinses it for her. She spends a long time with her head pressed against his chest, bubbles popping into thin air against their skin.

“I’m sorry.” She whispered, tears welling up again. “‘M so sorry.”

“Shhh. I love you more than life. I’d do this every day. I don’t need an apology okay?”

The bath drains her. He gets her into a robe and she crawls immediately back into bed. There’s no time to detangle her hair for her. She goes to sleep and lets her curls mat against the pillow. He doesn’t stop her.

Day nine she comes downstairs for lunch. He makes her soup. She finds an old loaf of bread and drizzles olive oil over it before broiling it. It’s the first cooking she’s done in days and he beams with pride, he’s sure of it. They get her hair detangled together. She cries at the puff of hair that comes from the comb. He holds her for a while and then helps her back up the stairs.

Day ten is a movie on the couch.

Day eleven she walks around outside with him.

It sometimes feels like the tiniest of steps, but every day seems to get a little bit better. She cries and sleeps and still seems to think herself into a frenzy, and yet he gets to see her slowly come back to herself. It’s not until two full weeks after the first incident that she finally talks to him about any of it.

He was in the bathroom shaving and she walked in on socked feet wearing one of his sweatshirts and apparently nothing else. He could still only beam at her like crazy. It was practically in his DNA to be smitten by that woman.

“Hi.” She whispered to him in the mirror.

“Hello. I like your sweatshirt by the way.”

She smiled. The first smile he’d seen in weeks. And it drove him giddy. So giddy he slipped and cut himself like an idiot.

“Ah shit.” He mumbled touching at the cut.

“Are you alright?” She asked him and reached on her toes to touch his shoulders.

He couldn’t quite explain the intimacy her touch brought. Or how starved he’d felt of the feeling. Truly the thought had never occurred to him in the past few weeks. Despite their active and frankly adventerous sex-life, a day hadn’t gone by when he thought about anything but her wellbeing. So why, oh why was he ready to fall to his knees and cry for her off the touch of a goddamn shoulder?

He nodded shakily. “Just a knick, sweetheart. You look...you seem--you know? Good today. Better than the past few days.”

“Yea I--I feel different. Good different.”

“Yea?”

She peered up at him. “Yea. But maybe I should let you finish up here. I could make us some eggs and toast maybe? I--I don’t think I’m ready for much else.”

“Eggs and toast sound great. I’ll be right down.”

“Okay.”

She nodded to herself like she needed the confirmation that she could do it before turning on her heel.

“Y/n?”

“Yea?”

“I love you.”

“I love you too.”

***

“I still don’t really know what happened. I’ve never experienced anything like that before.”

He reached for the hand not occupied with playing with her eggs and squeezed.

“Did you ever have depression or anxiety before? Maybe to a lesser degree?”

Y/n snorted. “Depression? Anxiety? In my mother’s household? I love her dearly but black mothers aren’t exactly rolling out the welcome mat to therapy. My mother had one goal, to keep a roof over my head, and she didn’t make room for much else. We didn’t have time to be sad.”

He frowned. “Darling that sounds...honestly kind of terrible.”

“Maybe. But it’s the reality I grew up in. Depression has always been a white folks thing.”

“Well last I checked depression doesn’t know color, babe. And I think the fact that you lied in bed for two weeks means that there’s something bigger at play here.”

She raised an eyebrow at him. And he knew she was back by the way that eyebrow told him every word that would come out of her mouth before she said it.

“You know you’ve gotten bolder since you married me? I don’t like it.” She whined.

He chuckled softly and reached to push her dish out of reach. She’d taken to playing with the leftover scraps so that she didn’t have to look him in the eye, but he desperately needed her attention.

“If anything I’ve only fallen more in love with you. And I just wanna understand. I wanna help. If that means getting you to understand that you, my beautiful, intelligent wife are not immune to depression and anxiety, then I’m sorry we’ll simply have to work through it. I’m only interested in what’s best for you, you know that.”

She bit her lip and squeezed his hands, intertwining their fingers across the table. Her mouth dips into a frown as she finally reflects on her emotions.

“I just kept thinking about it. I mean constantly. I--I couldn’t stop. And it...made me sadder than I’ve ever been in my life.” She whispered. “Even now I’m imagining bodies. When I close my eyes that’s what I see. And I don’t know their names, I don’t know their faces, but I can feel their pain. And it is absolutely insufferable. It’s like this big, huge brick. And I can’t move it. I can’t get rid of it. It’s just there. All the fucking time.”

“That sounds terrifying baby.” He sighed holding onto her tighter. “I--I’m so sorry that you’re feeling this way.”

“What the fuck am I supposed to do? See a therapist in the middle of a pandemic? Whine about my sadness while we live in a mansion and fucking cook all day while healthcare frontliners are pulling twenty-four hour shifts, and people can’t afford their bills? I don’t do this, Shawn. This isn’t me.” She sniffled.

He let go of her hands and wiped at her tears instead. This felt like a moment best spent with her cheeks in his palms anyway.

“Hey, having money doesn’t mean you don’t get to feel. In fact I think you’re the person who taught me that. What you’re feeling right now is nothing less than a product of your empathy and your willingness to care for people you’ve never even met. You need to be fucking kinder to yourself, do you hear me? It’s my wife you’re talking about.” He smiled. “We’ll get you whatever you need. But we will get it, and you don’t need to feel bad about that. I promised you the world didn’t I?”

She sighed and took a deep breath to calm herself, always feeling quite silly when he held her face that way. It’s why he did it.

“I do remember something to that effect.” she said dryly.

“Good. Now perhaps I could kiss you? It’s been quite a while for me.”

“It has...You may proceed.”

“Thank you, your majesty.” He chuckled and kissed her silly at the dining room table. “Hey I think I have an idea to balance how you’re feeling and still get you the help that you need.”

“Oh god. Every time you have an idea it always ends up with me having a damn heart attack.”

“I’ll keep the paddles near by.”

“Not funny!”

***

*y/n’s point of view*

Leave it to Lady Gaga to try and save the world. And leave it to her to reach out to Shawn and ask for your help when you couldn’t get out of bed. Women really do it all.

She called on a Sunday. She said she was sick of the instalives and the donation swipe up buttons and the rally cries that we were all in the same boat. She wanted to use her privilege, her money, and her big ass mouth to really get some change made. But she couldn’t do it alone. She had three people helping her thus far and they’d raised twenty million already. But, the reality was that the pandemic was disproportionately impacting black and brown bodies. If the thought of the pain and the death was really getting to you, this was essentially your shot to make some good out of it.

So, you went all out. Tyler Perry gave ten million up front. Normani donated five hundred thousand. Michael B. Jordan gave a million. Chadwick added two. Oprah heard Tyler gave ten so she gave fifteen. The messaging was simple. Our people are hurting, it’s our responsibility to help the very communities that no one else will. Besides, Shawn and you were putting up another ten million yourselves. Excuses were minimal.

Every one of your artists joined in on the One World: Together at Home, including the big man himself with the piano you bought him for your anniversary. It really was an amazing experience. That didn’t mean you were fixed though. Usually work in the midst of anything going on in your life was your MO, but you couldn’t manage to kick this one. There were still days where you just needed to sleep and sleep and try to forget the world was in turmoil. And the hardest part is seeing him lean over to your side of the best and whisper in your ear asking if there was anything he could do. There was so rarely anything he could do.

There’s a therapist. Black. Female. Located in Toronto but she was raised in Alabama. Shawn finds her when you don’t get out of bed again. It’s the most stern your husband had ever been with you, and even that was full of devastatingly warm gooiness.

“You need to talk to someone. And I understand that it can’t be me. I understand it needs to be someone who gets it and who can connect with you in all the ways that you’re hurting right now. So we’ll set up the zoom calls on the tv in your office, you can close the door; we never even have to talk about what goes on during your sessions. But, baby I...I can’t watch you just be in pain like this. Not anymore, okay? So you’re going to therapy dammit, do you hear me?”

And that’s the story of how you got a therapist for the first time in your life. Men. So dramatic.

***

Permanent taglist

@simpledomain @liliane106 @thecurlsofgod @kamahriii @sinplisticshawn @lifeoftheparty74 @xeuphorically-moonstruck@euphoric05 @daijanicole @bruhh-whateven @learning-howto-be-myselfx3 @decewill @goldiean @bitchacho25 @bruhh-whateven @justbeingoceana @loveylangdon @iloveshawnieboi@justbeingoceana @september-lace @valedictorian65 @disaster-rose @dimestorebieber22 @MixerMani @qcoachcartier @kamahriii @sinplisticshawn @lifeoftheparty74@justbeingoceana

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#shawn #shawn mendes #shawn mendes series #shawn mendes fluff #shawn mendes fic #shawn mendes fanfiction #shawn mendes fanfic #shawn mendes fandom #shawn mendes x reader #shawn mendes x you #shawn mendes x oc #shawn mendes x black reader #shawn mendes x black woman #shawn mendes x black oc #shawn mendes x y/n #shawn mendes blurb #shawn mendes oneshot #arrangement fic

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clairecrive · 4 years

Text

“Waterloo”- Bane x OC

This is for the anon and @littlewollff that requested Bane. Om I’m so excited for you all to read this! I got pretty ambitious about it and it got me even out of my comfort zone, with writing about fight scenes and smut. Anyway, I really hope you like this! Can’t wait to hear your thoughts!

Tag list: @deaflikehawkeye, @mollybegger-blog, @of-love-and-of-the-sea, @br0ck-eddie, @evelynshelby, @fandom--0verdose, @innerpaperexpertcloud, @shadow-of-wonder , @sopxhiea (let me know if you wanna be added)

Warning: SMUT, flashbacks are in italics

Moving in had proven to be a harder task than Donna first thought but at the same time it turned out to be a pleasant one too. Unpacking her stuff meant that she got to find things she had considered long lost. Her life had not been always easy but Donna soon discovered that with time only the good moments were forever stuck in her memory. Her cherished musicals collection gave her a bittersweet feeling, proud of having so many but as it had always been, they also made her think of her mother. That lovely woman who she had got to know only through her grandparents’ stories. Donna had always felt close to her mother while watching musicals, especially those that her grannie told her were her mother’s favorites. Finding her precious fuchsia pin though was a whole different experience. She had loved that thing, she remembered how she used to wear it all the time. She could recall especially one particular night when she had been wearing that.

When Donna was a teenager, she had started dyeing her hair. The color changed from time to time and when she met Bane, she had been settled on pink hair for a while. According to the hair color, Donna arranged her wardrobe, makeup and accessories. So, she used a sparkly glittery fuchsia clip to hold her baby hair back during that time. The way they met wasn’t a conventional one and neither was the first night they spent together. She reckoned she had been startled and confused, maybe even a little scared. However, now that her mind brought her back to that moment, she couldn’t help but smile fondly at the memory as it played through her mind.

17 March, St Patrick day. Even if Donna had Irish blood in her veins, she couldn’t help but feel indifferent at the festivity. If it hadn’t been for a colleague that had mentioned it to her, she wouldn’t have even remembered it. She had always cherished her Irish heritage knowing how important it had been for her grandparents. Donna was aware that she owed everything to those lovely people and that’s why she had always taken part in the festivities regarding this very day when she was at home. However, since their death and her departure from Ireland, she couldn’t connect to that part of herself anymore. She found it very painful to do so and so locked it stayed, barely acknowledged.

There was something that she used to do with her grandparents on this day that she still did though, a sort of ritual. She didn’t know why but St Patrick day had always been taken by her grannie as a way to celebrate her mother. So, every year they would watch one, or a few, of her favorite films. That’s why Donna had grown up to love musicals, it was inevitable really. Even if she couldn’t seem to be able to cherish her Irish heritage anymore, she couldn’t renounce of that tradition. And so that’s where she was that night when unbeknownst to her, her whole life changed, on her bed singing along to “Mamma Mia”’s songs. At first, she had been too into her karaoke session to notice what was happening behind her. From her bedroom window, Bane was crawling in, trying not to damage his body more than it already was. He didn’t know how or why but Catwoman’s blow didn't kill him. It only left him to wake up in a lot of pain, even more than he was used to bear, and with numerous wounds that needed to be taken care of. The sight before him was rather… unusual. He had expected to be met with screams of fear, tears or a shocked expression even. Instead, Bane was met with the sight of Donna performing along with the actors on the screen. She was absolutely off-key but Bane was amused anyway. When he sat down on her window seat, groaning from the pain and holding his side, that was when Donna spun around startled by the noise he made and froze on the spot. She didn’t indulge in gossip but his face was one that everyone in Gotham knew. After the failed revolution it was almost impossible not to know him. Donna couldn’t help but feel scared at the sight of his masked face. Her mind instantly linked him with the uproar and the danger he put the city in. Not that Donna loved Gotham but she certainly cared for her life. Forcing her mind to work and not give up on her, she took him in. The side he was holding in his hand was bleeding and the mask, his distinctive trait, was damaged.

“Never thought of getting into Hollywood? I’m sure you’d make it.” His voice sounded strange. Strained, muffled. Probably because of the pain he was in and the mask on his mouth.

“What are you doing here?” She found herself asking, completely disregarding his words.

“As you can see I’m in need of a little help.” Bane simply said, silently asking her to clean his wounds.

“I’m not a doctor nor a nurse.”

“I’ll just need a first aid kit and somewhere to stay.” He resolutely told her and Donna couldn’t do much other than supplying him with what he had asked.

Sitting on her bed, she observed him cleaning and bandaging his own wounds in fascination. Donna could barely clean a scratch on her knees without flinching and here it was, an almost fatally wounded man in front of her that was taking care of himself without batting an eye. Bane could feel her eyes on him but continued to act none the wiser. This little woman was taking it well, better than he first expected. He figured that staring at him wasn’t a big of a deal. He was used to being at the centre of attention anyway.

Much to his surprise, when he wrapped the last bandage on his body, she got up and gathered everything he had used to clean after him. Before leaving the room, she almost imperceptibly pointed with her head to the bed she previously had been sitting on. Bane didn’t wait for her to ask twice, so that’s where Donna found him when she returned to the room. He heard her soft steps on the carpet but didn’t open his eyes to acknowledge her. However, his eyes snapped open when he felt the bed dip beside him. Donna was standing on her knees at his side, holding up something in her hands that he later identified as duck tape. Ever so timidly, she pointed to his mask and he understood that she was asking him permission to touch it.

“It probably won’t do much but your mask is broken. I can put the pieces together. Until you find a permanent solution.” Donna had never spoken so softly before and didn’t even know why she was almost whispering now. Like she was talking with a wild beast, afraid that if she spoke too loud she would startle her and made her attack her.

His mask was off-limits, everyone knew. However, Bane felt himself nodding before he could register what he was doing. This little lady was certainly… one of a kind. Not only she hadn’t screamed or tried to hurt him but was also trying to help him. Was she too kind or just insane? Bane couldn’t know, having only met her, but her hands on his face were gentle and unthreatening, he decided. Her touch then left his face and after a few seconds, he heard her leave the bed only to return right away with her laptop. She laid next to him, Bane didn’t know whether it was for keeping an eye on him or checking in on him, put her headphones in and pressed play.

Trying not to let her know, he glanced at the screen but wasn’t able to recognize the film she was watching. He knew it was a musical though, seeing as there were people dancing and singing. He closed his eyes again, trying to relax and didn’t open them even when he heard her whispers. It seemed that she wasn’t doing a good job at preventing herself from singing along, not that Bane minded. Even if his eyes were closed, his ears were always listening in to see if there was any danger approaching. He knew that there were men looking for him and in the state he was in, he couldn’t put up much of a fight. And the lady… well, he didn’t really think her capable of fighting against mercenaries, nevermind the police. The only thing that he could hear were the words that would leave her mouth from time to time. Until he heard it. The lock of her main door squeaked. Someone was trying to break in, he concluded opening his eyes.

Tapping on her shoulder, he got her attention. Turning to him, she removed one headphone and looked questioningly at him.

“Someone’s is trying to break in.” He said calmly trying to not make her panic. To his surprise she didn’t, she only nodded and got out of bed. She walked in her bathroom, opened her shower and put on some music. Walking back into her room, she strolled over the side of her bed where he was resting and helped him get off.

Trying to support as much of his weight as she could, Donna let him wrap one of his big arms around her shoulders and together they slowly limped towards the bathroom. The small walk tired them both, Bane was still weak from the blow and the blood loss while Donna was simply not used to lift something, or in this case, someone, that heavy. She gently helped him so that he was sitting on the edge of her bathtub that could also be used as a shower and turned around to lock the door. When she faced him again, she was met with an inquisitory stare. Bane wasn’t in the state to physically stop her, so he had followed her in the bathroom, but was still able to understand that her plan, if she even had one, simply was going to fail.

“They are looking for you. When they don’t find you here and see that I’m in the shower, they’re just going to go away.” She hoped so at least. Getting into the tub first, she gently turned him around, lifting his legs one at a time so that he was still sitting but was now in the tub. This time, she took both of his arms and wrapped them around her neck, while hers went around his waist. With her feet firmly planted on the ground of the tub, she crunched a little, to give herself a little push to make him stand up. She knew that she couldn’t possibly hold him like this for more than 5 seconds, so she swiftly pivoted. Holding him up with the help of the wall, they were standing close, too close. Their skin touching but their faces apart given the height difference. Donna tried not to think too much about it. They were just doing what was necessary to escape death after all. It didn’t mean anything. Her skin wasn’t reacting funny at his touch. It was for the strain she was putting her muscles through. His breath hadn’t stopped because she was close to him. It’s just that he was in pain. Then, in hope to make her plan work, she started to sing along to the song that was playing.

However, much to Donna’s dread and Bane’s not-at-all surprise, the men didn’t stop at the empty house or at the implication of the water running and loud music playing. When it came to Bane, they weren’t taking any chances. Only standing at his corpse, they would stop. Bane was perfectly aware of their way of thinking because it was also his and a shiver run through his spine at the thought of what was going to happen. No matter how many times he had defeated death, he wasn’t immortal and it seemed that his time had come much sooner than he would have liked. He had never been afraid of death. He had even embraced it, planned for it when he took Gotham. His only regret was that it had to be this way, at the hand of worthless men rather than for a noble cause.

When he heard the door lock creak yet again, his eyes involuntarily moved to the petit body of his unlikely rescuer. He wouldn’t go as far as to say that he cared about her, because then he would be lying. And Bane was above lies. He had never been ungrateful though and was perfectly aware that if it hadn’t been for her, he probably would have died on that filthy road. He didn’t care for her but was mildly sad that she would die in this way. She seemed like a nice person. He knew she was kind and that was a rare thing in this wretched world. She was also full of surprises, he would come to find out. As a matter of fact, when he glanced down at her, the fire and resolution in her eyes startled him. Bane couldn’t possibly know but in her mind, all the different scenarios of what could happen in the next minutes were playing and she was doing her best to try and figure out a way where both of them would come out alive. She would be damned if she’d let those men hurt her, let alone kill her. Completely unaware of Bane’s eyes on her, she slightly nodded to herself when she decided the plan of action.

“Stay here and don’t move,” she told him firmly before hopping out of the tub. Quickly drying her legs, she hid behind the door. Even if they blasted it, and she knew that they would, there was still enough space for her to hide and wait for the right moment to strike. It was in moments like these that she was thankful for her stature. She would push the door right back in their faces, startling them and if she was lucky even sending them back on their asses, as soon as they would open the door.

Her previous plan hadn’t worked but fortunately, this one did. As she predicted, the blow of the door in their faces did startle the intruders but it wasn’t strong enough to make them fall down. Opening the door again, she took advantage of the startled man. Grabbing the hand that was holding a gun, she pulled it to her and closed the door on him at the same time. This time the blow was strong enough to have at least dislocated his wrist and to make him lose the grip on the gun. With her hand still wrapped around the man’s wrist, Donna let the gun drop to the floor and slammed the door on his head again. When she loosened her grip she was met with the comforting noise of his body falling on the floor. Donna wasn’t sure if they had realized what was going on or if they thought it was Bane attacking them. Anyway, she needed to use everything she had to her advantage. Now that the element of surprise was gone she had to think quick on her feet. However, the door shook again preventing her to formulate any kind of plan.

She didn’t know how many men there were outside but when the door busted open again she couldn’t do much except for fighting. Hiding the gun she already had in the waistband of her pants, she braced herself just in time. She could only see other two men beside the one that was still k.o. on the floor. The one that entered first, pointed a gun at her head but before he could fire, Donna thrusted his arm to the ceiling, the shot wasted in the air while she swiftly jabbed him in the guts and in the neck with her elbow. When the man bent in two, she graciously let her knee and his nose get acquainted. Blood sprayed everywhere and even if she didn’t hear it crack because of the music, she knew she had broken his nose. When she spotted at the corner of her eyes that the other man was ready to shoot her, she let her instincts take over her. Pushing the wounded bleeding man to the door knocking him out, she pivoted on herself doing a 360-degree angle with her leg and kicked him in the face. Donna didn’t know what had possessed her to make her act like this, she didn’t even know she could be that flexible. It had been ages since her last martial arts class. She still got it apparently, she mused while she looked as the last man fell down with satisfaction.

Too busy catching her breath and disarming the men while making sure that they stayed out cold, she didn’t notice that the shower had been shut down and that Bane was standing behind her, leaning against the door frame.

“You knocked out three of my men.” He observed. Was that admiration in his voice? Or maybe astonishment? Donna couldn’t tell.

“Well, why the hell were they trying to kill me?” She didn’t feel accusation in his voice but felt the need to defend herself all the same.

“I believe they were trying to rescue me and thought of you as a threat.”

“A threat? Have you seen me?” she scoffed, “ you should recruit less stupid men.” She concluded while walking to him to help him back to the bed.

“You did manage to knock three fully trained mercenaries out cold.” Bane pointed out as a matter of fact and this time Donna could spot the amazement in his voice.

“Didn’t I tell you about my taekwondo skills?” she acted none the wiser and laid back next to him. Bane snorted in amusement even though Donna didn’t hear. His mask emitted a constant low hiss, muffling a lot of his sounds.

“Why didn’t you fight me then?” He had been wondering since she started fighting the men. He didn’t think it possible but this little lady kept surprising him.

“My grandfather always used to say: know when to back off Donna, don’t be like Napoleon at Waterloo.” She explained with a soft smile recalling all the times her beloved grandparent would tell her those exact words. He had been a history teacher and was especially interested in the figure of Napoleon Bonaparte.

“You were Waterloo, even in your state.” she pointed out. Fighting those men had been all about survival. They were trying to take her out so she acted before they could return the favor. With Bane, it had been different. He was hurt and needed help. As long as she provided for him, she knew she didn’t have anything to fear from him. And also that he could strangle her with minimum strength and bare hands.

That night had surprised both her and Bane. She still couldn’t believe what she did. She had been trained to fight but never in that kind of situation. Where both her life and his were at stake. Sure, after that her muscles had been sore for days but it was the least that could happen. She had even feared to have strained something at one point. Fortunately, it was just that she was out of practice. However, she could still feel the pride she felt whenever Bane looked at her like he was seeing her for the first time. It was a really nice first impression, probably her best one. Lost in her memories, she didn’t hear the man of the hour walking behind her.

“Are you having trouble unpacking?” Bane asked her when he noticed her standing still in front of an open box.

“Oh no, I’ve just found something that brought me back,” Donna explained glancing at him over her shoulder, holding the clip up so that he could see. Not that she thought he would remember it or anything. And yet, little did Donna know, that Bane recognized the hair accessory indeed. Only that it brought him back to a completely different time. A sadder memory. A moment in their relationship of which he wasn’t really proud. One that if he could go back, would prevent from happening. But one that Bane knew, looking back to it after five years, helped them made the little jump they needed to bring their relationship to the next level.

Both Bane and Donna had never been fans of labels. Especially when it came to them, they much preferred living in the moment rather than risking ruining what they had by putting it in a box. Despite everything, it was safe to say that they had grown close. Very close. So close that they were now able to enjoy the comfort that only intimacy between two people that shared a bond could bring. As a matter of fact, after sex, they laid together in bed, both of them on their sides so that they were facing each other. One of Bane’s arms was under Donna head acting as a pillow, while the other rested on her back, slowly stroking the skin there. Donna was pretty much draped over him, one of her legs was over his waist and her arms held him in a loose embrace. It had always amazed her how smooth his skin was and after touching him for the first time she was also surprised to learn that his skin was soft and warm too. Always full of surprises this man. So they just were there, in each other arms, contently caressing the other. Skin to skin. Neither of their touches was sensual or provocative. Not at first. They were past round 1 and were just basking into the intimacy of the afterglow. But then Bane’s hand moved slowly from her back, where it was resting, to the curve of her ass cheek. Slowly but firmly he gripped her leg that was draped over his wait to secure it there and also move it a little higher so that their cores were now touching. He didn’t enter her yet, not even stroking, he just moved so that they were touching down there too. Donna gasped at the contact she didn’t expect but smiled a little when she felt him getting hard again. This man’s sexual appetite was endless. She didn’t move, allowing him to touch her and enjoying it at the same time. Bane took this as an invitation to proceed and so he did. He swiftly turned her on her back, his arms taking the most of his weight, otherwise, he would have crushed her, and her legs were now around him. Her hands didn’t stop touching him, they only moved to his neck. Donna would never tell him but his neck and his shoulders, so thick and strong, had always aroused her. And since his mouth wasn’t available to her, they took its place when it came to showing him affection and desire.

On Bane’s part though, he had always liked the striking difference in size between them. She was a tiny little thing, not even over 1.60, so infinitely little compared to him who was a bulky mountain of a man. It was no secret that Bane loved power and being in control, Donna had even compared him once to a certain Monica Geller - not that he knew who she was- and the fact that she was so small and that he could so easily manœuvre her and do anything he wanted, was a huge turn-on for him. Little did he know that it was something that aroused Donna as well.

One of his hand, moved from its position beside her head to instead trace her face. He had the habit of gently feeling her lips with his fingers and Donna had always wondered what it meant for him. If it was maybe a way for him to feel them since he couldn’t with his mouth, a kiss of sorts. In any case, she liked it and the way he carefully moved his fingers and his eyes lit up, would always make Donna curse in her mind at the fact that she couldn’t kiss him. His fingers then moved over her neck. They had been intimate for a while now and she had come to learn that he was as dominant in bed as he was in life and that one of his kinks was choking. Not used to it at first, Donna was, of course, startled and even a bit scared by the threat of his large hand on her throat. But for some unknown reason, she trusted him not to hurt her. And up until now, he didn’t give her a reason for her not to. However, his fingers didn’t wrap themselves around her neck as she expected but instead continued moving to her chest, where he felt her collarbone.

“Look at you, so small and yet so willing to take me.”

“Not going to lie, the first time I saw you I thought you were going to break me,” she confessed

“Oh, I could. I very well could break you, so easily. You never resisted me though.”

“I trust you. I know you won’t.” Taking her words in, Bane didn’t know what surprised him more, the fact that she genuinely believed that or that she trusted him. He didn’t stop to consider it though, he knew for certain what those words made him feel and that was what he was going to focus on.

Startling her yet again, both of his hands grabbed her bottom while he made her open up her legs more by leaning over her body. Adjusting her position so that they were perfectly aligned, he only needed to move his hips a little further and then they would be one. And when he did, both of them moaned for the sensation. Despite the fact that they had been doing this for a while, Donna had yet to get completely adjusted to his length. A part of her thought that she never would but fortunately, it wasn’t unbearable. Bane was very aware that their difference in size also meant that she’d take him with difficulty. And even if she had always been willing and never complained, he had always minded the first thrusts. Not too rough or fast. Just a few slow movements to let her walls accommodate him. But when her breath would quicken and her legs’ grip would tighten around him, he knew it was time. Time to finally ravish her. Bane wasn’t a gentle man, and neither was his approach to sex. His hands were strong and would leave marks where they would grip Donna’s skin. His thrusts became more vigorous and deeper, his pube hitting her sensitive bundle of nerves, his legs slapping against her making her move a little on the bed. She knew him though, knew what he liked, so she braced herself and locked her arms around him as well, staying in place this way. Not that his grip on her ass would let her go anywhere.

The rhythm of Bane’s thrusts was always an increasing one: he would start slow to allow her to get used to his length and then, as her moans would be louder and her hands gripped his shoulders harder, he would quicken until the room was filled with the sound of their pelvis slapping and Donna’s broken breath. Bane was delighted to find out that a little thing like Donna was able to take him, even when it seemed that his mission was to break her in two. Donna, on the other hand, wasn’t so shocked to find out that Bane is very vocal in bed. Not in the sense of dirty talking, sometimes he would do that too, but more in the way of asserting his dominance and her submission.

With his head on her neck, where his mask was gracing her skin, he bashed in the sensation of her tight walls around him. Adjusting his position so that he was leaning on her resting his weight on his hands beside her head. That only lasted for a while though, the urge to wrap his hand around her slim neck was too strong.

“ Such a tiny doll, so tight,” he panted in her ear continuing to mercilessly snap his hips on hers, “and yet taking me so well.”

“I wonder if it wasn’t made especially for me.” Applying more pressure on her neck, he stopped his movement with a strong thrust, opting for going deep rather than fast. “No matter because it’s mine.” The possessiveness was loud and clear in his voice but the growl he made while he slowly entered her again left no doubt.

“Am I right, Donna?” His answer was more of a rhetorical one but Donna knew that he liked to hear her answer nevertheless. And she did open her mouth to answer him. She couldn’t though, only a loud gasp left her lips. He set up a pace that he knew was torturing her and making her unable to make any rational thinking. He would slowly pull away, to the point where only his tip was in, be like this for a moment before going in again with a powerful snap of the hips arriving as deep inside her as he could.

He needed to know, needed for her to talk back, needed the reassurance that she was his and only his.

Moving his hand to press his thumb on her clit, he called for her attention again.

“Answer me.” And with that, his thrusts regained speed adding to his fingers stroking her where she was most sensitive, it brought her over the edge.

“Oh my god, Bane!” Donna was in pure ecstasy. Her legs were shaking but didn’t lose their grip on him, while her fingers had painfully gripped his shoulder blades. She was a mess, heart beating so fast that was ready to leave her body and her breath so quick that it seemed she had been running the marathon. Donna knew though that Bane wasn’t finished and that since she hadn’t answered him, she was in for a delicious punishment. That’s what she thought.

Growling at her like an angry fiend, Bane pulled out of her only to hastily turn her on her stomach and re-entering her from behind. Holding her still by wrapping a hand in her hair, he resumed thrusting only this time even more vigorously. Still coming down from her high, Donna was still sensitive and while normally she was able to take Bane’s strength with no fuss, now it was bordering pain.

His hand, resumed its position on her neck gripping hard and pulling her toward him, while hers snapped behind her on his chest to try and tell him silently to slow down. Bane though didn’t seem to notice. He was too far into his mind, set off by her silence, he was soon reminiscing all the time he would catch her laughing or mingling around with men of his army. He had never thought much about it, sure of where her loyalty stood. Now though he wasn’t so sure anymore.

As the thought registered in his mind, he gripped way harder on her neck while increasing his tempo, not aware of how his actions were putting Donna off, until he was snapped out of it by her screams.

“Bane! Bane, stop!” she pleaded, “I don’t want this anymore,” she repeated more vigorously when he didn’t even slow down. The way he gripped her neck, almost choking her, and the way he was mercilessly pounding into her like he was stabbing her in a way, was all too much for her. Donna didn’t know what had set him off but she needed him to stop. She enjoyed it rough but this was just violence. She tried to push him away with her hand when he ignored her and as he got suddenly pulled back to earth, he released her immediately when he registered and her cries for him to get away from her. She fell back on the bed and immediately turned around to face him, holding her knees to her chest so that not even an inch of her skin was touching his. Donna looked at him like he had wounded her, the betray in her eyes painfully evident for him. And for the first time in his life, Bane didn’t know what to say. He realized that he got carried away, lost himself in his emotions and let them control his body. That alone would have been outrageous for him but the fact that she had witnessed this moment of weakness and had even suffered from it, made it even harder for Bane to comprehend his actions. What had gotten over him?

Donna was busy in a train of thought of her own but unbeknownst to her, she was posing herself the same question. What had gotten over him? Okay, that he was usually rough in bed, but this was a different thing. It felt like he really wanted to hurt her, like he wanted to punish her for some reason. That wasn’t rough, it was hate fucking. And Donna didn’t know what to do with that realization. Locked in his bathroom probably wasn’t the best way to deal with this. But what should she do? What could she do? What could have happened to make Bane despise her so? Did something happen or it was just that he got tired of her and wanted to push her away? Did she think that Bane was capable of doing something like that? To be fair, Donna couldn’t say to really know Bane. But she did spend a lot of time with him and she had always thought him to be articulate and upfront. He didn’t seem the type of man to restore to such low acts instead of facing the problem. But what could she know? At the end of the day, you really can’t say to know your partner. Above all, Bane.

They weren’t even partners, Donna sourly considered. What they had was… something for sure but they never stopped and put a label on it. Yes, they were lovers in the sense that they had sex. Very frequently. But was it just that? Were they at least friends? Did he even care about her or was it just physical? Donna had never cared much for labels. As long as there were mutual trust and respect, she didn’t have any problems. But now that those requirements were abruptly missing, she started to question their relationship. If she could even call what they had that way.

She should talk to him. Yes, that was the best thing to do, she concluded. Maybe it was going to be painful and uncomfortable but she had to do it. It was time to cross some T’s and dot some I’s. Once she returned to the bedroom, she discovered that Bane had left just as she did. Disappointment washed over her. She had expected him to be waiting for her to explain. Apparently not. However, shaking her head, she didn’t let this sway her. She needed to talk to him and she would. Even if she had to wait for him. Sure, she could go and look for him but maybe it was best that she waited for him to cool off. An angry Bane wasn’t one to mess with. Not that Donna was scared of him. She had never been scared of him before, certain that he would never hurt her. Now, however, she wasn’t so sure anymore. And despite her best efforts, she couldn’t help but feel disappointed. Maybe it was wrong of her to trust a mercenary this much but she had always been a firm believer in duality. In the sense that she knew that people were complex beings and one couldn’t just put them in a box and expect them to fit in there. One could be more than one thing. And Bane was more than just a mercenary. Now though, she was beginning to question this very fact. Perhaps she had been wrong. Too naive for trusting him so.

Little did she know though, that she had been right all along. Bane was more than just a mercenary. As a matter of fact, he was troubled by what happened. A man who was just a mercenary wouldn’t have been. He knew that Donna probably expected some sort of explanation from him, if not even an apology. He also knew that he owed her that, but he was also aware of the fact that he needed to sort himself out first. How could he explain to her what happened when he was the first one that hadn’t a clue?

Both of them had spent the rest of the day trying to put their thoughts in order. Clueless to the fact that the only way they could really sort themselves and the situation was by talking to the other. And that, unfortunately, didn’t happen. Bane didn’t return to their shared bedroom, choosing to keep himself busy with work instead, and Donna couldn’t find the strength to seek him out. If only she did, she would have put them both out of their misery. She would have spared herself from making a desperate and rushed decision: to pack her bags and leave.

When Bane didn’t come back, she took his action as a way to dismiss her. As a confirmation of her thoughts: he had grown tired of her and had given her a reason to go. He was pushing her away and even if she hated that they couldn't even talk about it before she left, she wasn’t going to impose her presence where she wasn’t wanted. And so, as it began so it ended: with one of them leaving the scene abruptly.

Needless to say, Donna had misunderstood the whole situation. But she couldn’t know what was going on inside Bane’s mind. She could only wonder. And her mind brought her to the wrong conclusion. But she wouldn’t know that she did for a long while. When Bane finally returned to their bedroom, expecting to find her there, he was upset, to say the least when he realized that she was gone. With just a note to notify him.

“Breaking up is never easy I know but I have to go. Here is where the story ends

this is goodbye. Knowing you it's the best I can do.”

That’s what the note said. In perfect Donna’s style, she had broken up with him through a musical song. That notion had made him smile. Since she had forced him to watch the movie with her, he recognized the lyrics and at what point in the movie it came up. And so, as easily as always, he was able to go through her whole thought process and cursed himself when he realized what must have gone through her mind to make her leave. If he had gone back to the room earlier, he would have been able to stop her from jumping to a rushed and wrong conclusion. But he hadn’t and now she was gone.

Bane never really cared to understand what they were. He knew they were fine with each other, he knew Donna trusted him and since that night in Gotham, he had learned to trust her too. He wasn’t an emotional man. He had been trained to use his mind and to only rely on his logic and instincts when it came to making decisions. But now he was left at a crossroad. There was no one to tell him what to do anymore, he was the boss of himself. And while that had been debilitating at first, since he had been used to follow orders all his life, he had quickly learned to appreciate the power that came with getting to make the call. It was in times like these, however, that he found himself missing that part of his old life. When he didn’t need to think at stuff like this, when he was nothing more than a soldier he had orders and he had to follow them. No questions asked.

But he was not just a soldier anymore. He was a man. He was a person. Donna had helped him discover that through their time together. It had always amazed him how she was able to see through his mask and get through to him. She got to his core. She had managed to know him, to understand him. He had despised her ability at first, he hated that he was such an open book to her. He believed that to be a weakness of his. How foolish of him to think so. After the first few weeks since she left, he had come to find that he missed the closure, the intimacy. He missed her. To acknowledge that, to even admit his feelings to himself, had been a journey of itself. It had taken him a while. Almost a month to be precise. A part of him had feared that it was too late to go back to her. Maybe she had already moved on and forgot all about him. And while that possibility broke his heart, not that he would admit it, he knew that if he didn’t at least try, he would regret it.

So he did. He looked for her and when he acquired her exact position, he went to find her. She was surprised, to say the least when one day she opened the door to find him. She almost had a mind to close the door on his face, but the other part pushed her to hear him out. She just wanted to understand why, after all. So she had moved away and welcomed him in. And thank god she did, otherwise, they wouldn’t be standing here, in each others’ arms, reminiscing about the good old days. They had gone far since that day. Their relationship had grown and blossomed beautifully in something neither of them thought they would ever have.

Once, Donna had told him that one had to know when to surrender when one was facing their Waterloo. After a really long conversation, they had both come to the same conclusion: they were both facing their Waterloo, and surrendering to their feelings, allowing their heart to feel them and allowing themselves to live them freely, wasn’t so bad after all. “No,” Bane thought burying his face in Donna’s neck, “it wasn’t so bad at all”.

#bane #tom hardy bane #bane imagine #bane x oc #bane one shot #bane imagines #the dark knight rises #TDKR #batman #tom hardy #tom hardy imagine #bane smut #bane angst #bane fluff

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aurorashka · 4 years

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CHAN

The friend who is always there for you when you need him.

Keeps check on you by texting you at random hours, sometimes even around 4am/5am.

Always asks you for opinions about his music or lyrics (e.g. whether you like it or not, does it sound okay, is the lyrics meaningful).

If he feels down, not motivated or not inspired, he will call you immediately cause listening to your voice and your words gives him inspiration and motivation.

Enjoys having late night deep conversation with you.

Jokes to you about how he don't think he will even have time to date anyone, so he will just end up marrying you when the time comes for him to get married and settle down with a family (but little did you know that he was being serious about it because you are his muse).

LEE KNOW

Sometimes makes you wonder why are you even friends with him because he rarely treat you nicely but that's his love language, he enjoys disturbing and bullying people he loves.

Always! LIKE ALWAYS!! Sends you pictures of Soonie, Doongie, Dori and meme faces of himself and his members.

Whenever you're stressed out or have a sudden break down, he will be the sweetest person ever! He will hold your face close to his chest and ask you to let it all out while he rubs your back gently and place his chin on top of your head.

Sometimes if you talk too much, he will just shut your mouth by telling you that he likes you and then laugh at your shocked reaction and you end up beating him while blushing (deep down inside he does like you but he doesn't want to ruin the friendship).

He even stays with you in your apartment during his holiday so that he can spend time with you freely and uses his members are annoying him as an excuse, so that you won't tease him for missing you.

Always buys for you foods and snacks whenever he come to visit you just because he loves watching you eat (basically you're just another cat like Soonie, Doongie and Dori to him).

CHANGBIN

The best friend who will ALWAYS force you to have a rap battle with him, praises you even when you don't rap so well because he knows that you're trying so he supports you.

When he's upset about something or stressed out preparing for their comeback, the first person he wants to meet up and have a talk with is you.

He likes placing his head on your lap while talking about his problems because your lap is his comfort zone.

He doesn't like if anyone bullies or talks bad about you; if he finds out about them, then he will either warn them if he's in a good mood but if he's in a bad mood...THEY BETTER RUN AWAY! He will definitely beat them up.

He's your personal bodyguard, no matter what you're doing or wherever you are he needs to know, either he calls/texts you to ask or you have to call/text him and let him know.

You're like a little sister to him, so he might introduce you to Felix, Chan, Han or Jeongin and set you guys up on a date because he trusts them with you.

HYUNJIN

The drama llama queen who sasses and spills tea about everyone who irritates him to you (about his members especially).

Forces you to watch all k-dramas with him, so that he will have someone to talk to about it, so if he asks you to spend time with him, it will usually be a drama marathon.

Seeing you in pain is something he can't tolerate at all, so he will comfort you, be there for you and sometimes even cry to you telling that he's sorry because you're going through the pain.

Doesn't like to see other members hanging out or getting close to you, so he doesn't bring them to meet you or take you to their dorm to hangout.

He hates it whenever you fangirl over his members especially Han because he's jealous, when you start teasing him about it, he will just scoff and be like, "Me? Jealous? Pfftt...Never!".

He loves teaching you Stray Kids choreography to all their songs for two reasons; firstly, he can have "not so obvious" skinship with you and looking at his crush...I mean bestfriend dancing to his group songs makes him get the butterfly effects.

HAN

That one crackhead friend who makes you do crackhead stuffs with him and ends up making you look like the clown...yes that's Han.

Loves taking you out to eat because looking at you munching the food cutely makes him go uwu.

Whenever you're busy and don't give him attention, he will randomly text/call you (if he's not physically there with you) or pokes your side (if he's physically there with you) and tells, "Chogiyo noona, hokshi namja chingu isseoyo?".

When he's stressed or upset with his work, he always wants you right next to him to comfort him and also when you pat his head and kiss the side of his head as a sign of comfort makes him feel good.

Call you whenever he's done with his schedule or during his break just to make sure you have eaten and everything is going well for you.

Please never ever tell him when you're on your period, he will annoy you by asking you about your mood swings, cravings and symptoms; it may be irritating but he just wants to know so that he can make you feel comfy.

FELIX

He will force you to create a TIKTOK account and makes you to do it with him, even when you say no.

Comes to your place just to play games because his members are not there to disturb him and he also says that your apartment's wifi connection is way better than his dorm's.

Will attempt to cook for you but ends up making a disaster in your kitchen and sulks about it the whole day, so you have to cheer up this sulky baby and order take away to comfort him.

Teaches you Aussie accent and laughs whenever you make a mistake because he thinks you look adorable when you mess it up.

Loves taking you to the dog cafe he usually goes to and takes a lot of pictures of you there.

He will definitely bring you to the dorm and introduce you to every members and hope you will come to visit them often.

SEUNGMIN

The first thing he always tells (or shouts) when you answer his phone call or when you open the door for him is, "SEUNGMIN IN THE BUILDING!" and then he will giggle cutely.

His phone or camera gallery is filled up with your pictures because he loves taking pictures of you.

Will definitely make you listen to day6 whenever you guys hang out .

When you don't feel well or stressed he's always there to cheer you up and cook for you; he loves taking care of you.

He might even write some songs for you but he keeps it to himself or only shares them with Chan because the songs are usually love songs.

All his members knows that he likes you a lot and even tell him about it but he's still unsure about the feelings because he has never felt like this before only you make him feel completed and also he's afraid that you might reject him and it can affect your friendship.

I.N

He acts shy and distant when the members are around but when you guys are alone, he's like a literal fluff ball...super adorable, hyper and noisy.

When you don't give him attention, he will hold your hand and keeps swinging them back and forth while calling your name cutely till you give him attention.

Enjoys having karaoke session with you.

He loves whenever you have skinship with him, even the members thinks he's weird because he doesn't like when the members have skinship with him but he's fine with you.

Whenever you cry to him due to stress or if things are not going well, he will cry with you because he gets hurt looking at your crying state and it ends up you comforting him instead him comforting you.

He hates it when his members tries to get your attention because the only person who you are supposed to pay attention and give love to is the one and only Jeongin!

#stray kids #skz #kpop #kpop au #stray kids imagines #kpop imagines #stay #skz chan #skz changbin #skz hyunjin #skz imagines #skz lee know #skz felix #skz seungmin #skz jeongin

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peach-pops · 3 years

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anti-ships with my mutuals

there’s this fun trend going around where people will tag their mutuals and ship them with a character from hq/bnha and as sweet as it is, i decided to put a twist on it. i want to pair my mutuals with a hq boy (maybe bnha later if any of my mutuals wanna have one)that would be the most toxic combination/not mesh well with.

this is all in good fun so dont come for me and if i tag you, don’t be shy, i wanna know who you think you wouldn’t mesh well with as well as your own mutuals ( im self centered so this is an invitation to do one for me whether it’s a real ship or a anti-ship )

@icejins & oikawa

it pains me to write this cause the energy you two would have together could take down the whole world. you both are two confident baddies who know they’re cute but after a while, it would lowkey start to feel like you’re competing over things and one upping each other instead of supporting the other person. god, he’d give you the worst advice over things and if he tries to rant to you, i think your bluntness will just make him feel like you’re trying to be mean (hes the type where he needs to have things a bit sugarcoated sometimes) i don’t think ur the type to just be patient and willingly let volleyball be a priority over you like HUH? SOMETHING IS MORE IMPORTANT THAT ME? TF IS THIS BULLSHIT - and i don’t mean you’re priority #2 like i think you’d fall around 4 maybe 5 like jeez thanks. i think you would say it doesn’t bother you but what’s the point in being in a relationship when he hardly makes time for you and it’s clear to him and you that volleyball will always be his first love. you have your own shit to do and focus on, imagine you don’t show up to one of his games and he makes you feel bad (what if you don’t feel bad? he’d be so hurt) you’re pretty as hell and he’d just make you feel like arm candy - does he even know your favorite song? what makes you upset? hell, ask him what color your eyes are and this fool will have a stroke trying to remember. i also envision you two to be the type where if he pisses you off and you give him the silent treatment, he’s not gonna put his pride aside and apologize to you first and you’re stubborn in your ways so you’re not gonna give and it’ll go downhill from there. PLUS two bad knees doesn’t equal one good relationship, yall are already off on the wrong foot ha. if i can be even more honest, your ideal relationship with oikawa is like him being an older sibling where you both can check each other on yalls shit while still caring about one another.

@kirislut & terushima

look, this was hard cause ill ship you with anyone and it fits but terushima? you’re not into jerky guys, especially the ones who don’t take no for an answer. in all honesty, i dont even see how you two would ever start dating. he’s cute and you’ll give him that and sure, you love confident guys but there’s something about terushima that is cocky yet so unmotivating at the same time. you have your dreams and ambitions but he doesn’t really have a plan. it’s okay to not know what you want to do but you need someone who is motivated with goals and terushima could care less about the future, he lives in the now. you make him insecure - you’re accomplishing so much and instead of feeling like he’s dragging you down, he feels like you’re purposefully trying to leave him behind to rub it in his face. also again, we don’t know too much about terushima except that he’s a very spontaneous guy with a tongue piercing (jesus ur parents would have a field day with him).

@goopyartiste & tsukishima

oh god this feels like an emotionally abusive relationship- you’re very sensitive, this isn’t news to anyone who knows you. tsuki is kinda a jerk and as much as i loved his character development, it doesn’t stray from the fact that he isn’t an emotionally available person- at least not enough to date you specifically. if you had a bad day and he doesn’t give you the amount of attention or doesn’t give helpful advice, you would take it to heart and 9/10 times would cause a tsunami of tears. and again, these aren’t necessarily bad traits but in a relationship if you’re clingy with him, he’s going to respond negatively- his relationship with yamaguchi would be the exact way he would treat you so you can’t expect special attention. he’ll introduce you as his friend and you’d be too shy to correct him - it feels like the whole relationship will just be you apologizing for tsuki’s words and actions to others and as much as i love you, you wouldn’t have a strong enough voice against him and his “jerkish” tendencies. HES LIKE IF YOU DATED UR PARENTS DFGHJK IM SORRY BUT THEY’RE SO MEAN! you need someone who would be emotionally/physically available for you 24/7 and someone who isn’t afraid to truly love you. get out while you can girl, go! for your mental sanity please.

@shoutamajiki & bokuto

i dont think this combo would be toxic but its REALLY hard for me to picture this in my head??? i know you can be silly sometimes nana but you’re pretty serious and your paths in life are just so different. hes so extroverted and you like to be a lil more reserved so someone is bound to be out of their comfort zone. you can be very patient with people but i think it would be tiring to date bokuto knowing you would have to be the emotionally stable one between the two of you. he’s so sweet and he’s genuinely a good person but you need a partner where they aren’t so dependent on you- someone who it’s okay if you guys don’t talk all day and then when you two do see each other, you just pick up where you left off. you’re not one to be tied down and be available 24/7 and he needs someone who he can feel secure with without feeling insecure himself. so this one again isn’t toxic but i cant imagine yall kissing or anything so dont come for me

#tag game #moot moot #dont be shy who do i suck with PFTTTT #or who id be shipped with-#im sensitive PFT #meg 🥴#amy💒#isa 🍿#nana ☕️#tag games

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kpopshitposter · 5 years

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Heyooo, can you do prompt 64+65 for woosung please 🥰

Writing Prompt Meme

“Never stop smiling.” & “I’ll keep you warm.”

PLOT: You and Woosung were so in love. Every day was like a dream. Every moment was beautiful. Until he wants to move to Korea to pursue music. Years go by, and it isn’t until a fansign that you finally get what you’ve been needing.

My masterlist

It’s been years. Not just since you last saw him in person, but since you last spoke to him.

You and Sammy had studied together. That’s how it all started. You had been paired up for a joint presentation. You had never spoken before, but he had always been someone you’ve noticed across the room. His beauty was intimidating. You’ve never picked up the courage even for small talk.

Now look.

You had to sit with him, alone, and talk. For hours. Until the project was done.

If you had known the painful end that was to come, you wouldn’t have been so excited to get closer to the person from your fantasies.

It started out so simply. It was work-focused, purely business. Have my number so that we can arrange to meet up. Text me when you’re on your way. You forgot your notebook at my house - oh I recognise the people on the cover. You like that band, too? Have you seen the stage they did in onesies? No? Maybe when you come to pick it up we can watch it together.

Everything had flown into place.

The notebook had given you the tools you needed to get him talking about something other than work. You got to know him very well very quickly after that. You’d keep one another updated about the group, you’d go shopping for their albums together.

He started to message you more randomly. He started to send you little heart emojis. He started to sit next to you during classes and try to have lunch with you. You didn’t want to get ahead of yourself and be set up for disappointment, but the evidence was there, and the evidence was real. Maybe he felt what you felt, too…?

Then their concert came.

You agreed to go to the concert together, of course! It would be your first time out with him at night and for some reason that made it taste like possibility. You were more excited to be with Sammy than you were to see the band… and by the end of the night, you knew you were right to be so.

The night had started with him having an arm around your shoulders on your way to the venue (using how packed the bus was as an excuse - so that he took up less space).

It progressed to him shyly holding your hand as you waiting for the act to start (he didn’t want to lose you!)

You keep smiling at one another, letting them know that the little physical progressions were okay. More than okay.

The beat drops. Confetti fills the air and streams down over you.

He’s pulling you in. His hands are on you. He’s moving slow, making sure you want it. He steals your breath with his lips and your heart with his touch, all while smiling like he knows exactly what he’s doing to you.

You hurtled into space together.

Everything happened so intensely. It didn’t matter if you were or weren’t sharing firsts, it was different because it was the two of you.

Furniture wasn’t just furniture, they were tools that helped you comfortably be in love. Dates or outings weren’t just dates or outings, they were chances to learn the other person better. Nothing was simple in the sweetest way.

Restaurants would turn into lessons, let’s try as many different things as we can to learn about what the other doesn’t like. Clubs turned into which songs do you like. It was a competition of who could know and love the other person the most.

When people saw the little ways you took care of each other they were jealous… but that jealousy would soon turn into pity.

You had gone through yearly anniversaries, moving in together, graduating together, spending every waking hour possible wrapped up in each other’s arms (as well as every possible sleeping hour), but that dream was soon to come to an end.

He’d soon tell you that he’s leaving for Korea. He wants to pursue music and there’s a way for him to do that there.

Come with me, he pleads.

But your family is here. You’ve already started a career here. You don’t know the language. Your life isn’t there.

“I don’t wanna hold you back,” you tell him, “maybe I just have to let you go.”

So this is where it ends.

After he leaves you try to remain friends, he updates you and you update him. You frequently talk about missing each other. You video call and even though you’re not in a relationship you stare in awe at the screen. Your heart just can’t imagine belonging to anyone else.

Eventually, it all dies. He doesn’t reply to your messages anymore and you don’t get any updates from him. It’s okay, though, you knew he was busy, and the time zone difference was really no joke. It gives you a chance to move on.

Move on?... You were kidding yourself. You compared every relationship to that one. You compared everyone you met to Sammy. You compared every emotion to the ones you felt when he was by your side. Life didn’t compare. You could survive with enough joy to be content, but your heart had long forgotten peace.

You hadn’t just lost your boyfriend. You had lost your best friend. You really hated how alone you felt.

Years have gone by, and a simple YouTube ad was ready to destroy your contentedness. You’re ready to press skip when you see someone who looks familiar on a YouTube ad, you’re still skeptical when the video starts but then when you hear that beautiful, distinct, electrifying voice you know it’s him. It’s your Sammy.

You do your research - he goes more by Woosung now. You learn about his bandmates. You spend the next week discovering everything that’s happened to him since you stopped speaking. How long has it been? Four years? Why is your heart pounding like this after four years?

During your search you find a website promoting their most recent album with the chance of being entered for a fansign draw. You don’t really know what that means but it doesn’t bother you. You order the album without really thinking about it.

When it arrives you’re surprised by all the bits and pieces that come with it, the photocards, the pictures. It was like an endless experience. You stared at the most gorgeous picture of… Woosung with a heavy heart. But then a text comes through.

Congratulations. You’re going to meet The Rose.

It took a lot of convincing yourself. Forcing yourself. You were kind of hoping that you’d get some comfort from this. You hoped that this would help you close the chapter which had been abruptly cut short.

You were stood in the queue still debating whether or not you should go through with this. You were nervously toying with your clothing. What if he doesn’t recognise you? .... What if he does?

This is stupid. It’s been years. All because you saw some clips of him you’re suddenly a fan? You suddenly miss him? And what if he doesn’t want to see you? He’s just trying to have a good time with his fans and you’re here ruining it.

Okay. Forget it. Go home.

You’re about to turn around and leave when the queue starts to move forward. The crowd pushes you.

You can’t change your mind now.

Your nerves have tripled by the time you get to the front of the queue to meet them. Nothing that has happened up until that point has really mattered, it’s all just been about staring at him and remembering your life together. True love is so hard to find. It’s so painful to think it didn’t last.

You can see them all. You’ve learnt their names by now - first it’s Dojoon, then Woosung, Hajoon, Jaehyeong. That’s good. It gives you a second to - you’re being brought forward.

Dojoon greets you with a smile and you’re so dazzled by it for a moment that you forget why you’re here. Curiosity. Heartbreak. Longing. Woosung. Sammy. He asks you your name and you say it, hesitant that Sammy will hear you. He’s within arms reach. He’s holding hands with a fan. Dojoon signs your name and you thank him. You tell him you liked seeing his Haka dance, you thought it was nice that he was so aware of other cultures. You give him a little present you thought he might like based on the research you’ve done.

It goes by too quickly.

Sammy is looking down at his pen and fixing the cap as you stand in front of him. When you finally make eye contact, his smile fades into confusion.

He says your name.

He recognised you.

Your heart is pounding.

“Hi.” you manage.

“I didn’t know you were a fan.”

“I am. I know all of your songs, and everything about all of you.”

“You do?”

“Yeah… I’m proud of you, Sam- Woosung.”

“You can call me Sammy.”

“It’s fine…”

“... What should I write for you? We don’t get much time.”

You’re nervously biting your lip. “Whatever you want.”

Sammy taps the pen against the table. He started to write your name, and then he writes ‘Never stop smiling.’

You hand him his present. It’s the ring of his he once gave you which you had never gotten rid of. You had been watching fireworks. It had been a promise that you’d always be in love like you were.

He stares at it like he remembers. You wonder if he actually does.

How could he, with the way his life has gone?

“Wait by the backstage door two hours after this finishes.”

Whatever you were expecting, it wasn’t that. It wasn’t for Woosung to tell you he wants to talk to you. It wasn’t for him to touch your hands. It wasn’t for him to look so painfully beautiful.

“I don’t know…”

“Please? There are too many cameras here, too many people. We can’t talk like this, I can’t…”

“Okay. Yeah. I understand.”

“If you leave… I just want to let you know that this ring is still yours.” Sammy gently fixes your hair before taking the ring and putting it onto your index finger.

You’re being encouraged to move on.

He gently releases your hands. His sad eyes follow you and you move on to Hajoon. You try to not look back at him.

As soon as you’re done you run off to find the bathroom. The tears came quickly and they came hard. You hadn’t imagined it would be so difficult to see him again. You had come here for some form of closure, but all it did was make the hole deeper. You missed him. You missed being a part of his life. You missed his touch.

You can still feel his hands on you after hours of hiding in the bathroom.

You can still feel the tug to run home as you walk around to find the backstage door. The night air is cruel to you. The warmth you generate as you hug yourself matches how certain you are about all of this.

There’s a security guard there and a bit of rope cornering it off. Sammy must’ve not thought this through. You sigh and go to turn around but the guard calls after you and asks your name.

When you tell him, he releases the latch and steps aside to let you past. Although you’re hesitant, you go forward. Security must have been escorting everyone away for quite some time, because there’s really nobody around.

Figuring it would be creepy to just stand there staring at the door, you bring your phone out and pretend there’s something really interesting being shown on your screen. You shift from foot to foot, huffing warm air onto your hand in an attempt to not freeze to death. It was in this state of obliviousness that you feel arms wrap around you.

You quickly turn and see Sammy. He has a hood up, a mask covering his mouth, and a cap on low, but you’d recognise his eyes anymore.

You’ve turned into his chest.

“I’ll keep you warm.” he quietly says.

“Sammy…” you feel yourself on the brink of tears. Your phone is put away so that you can free your hands, palms long to feel if this is real.

“It’s been a long time.”

You nod, sniffling. “I… wasn’t sure if I should come.”

“I’m really fucking glad you came.”

You laugh a little, though it’s full of sadness. “You still swear like that?”

“Why? What did I say?”

“Nothing.”

He brings you closer. “Is this okay?”

“Y-yeah. I think so.” you cling onto his clothing. “I’ve missed you so much. I wasn’t sure if you’d remember me. I didn’t know if I should come. I’ve just-”

Suddenly you’re being hugged so tightly. You feel his cold nose brush against your neck. You so easily mould together that it feels like an enormous weight and a gorgeous epiphany at the same time.

“I had my phone stolen while I was travelling and I couldn’t get in touch with you any other way. You didn’t think I stopped messaging you, did you?” Well now you felt guilty for thinking it, but how were you meant to know his phone got stolen?....

“Well… yeah…”

“I didn’t stop thinking about you. You’re in so many of our songs.”

“I am?”

He pulls back enough to look and you and nods, lowering the mask so you can see his face properly. “You said you knew them all. Listen to Baby again.”

“Oh… okay.” with him right here, you can’t really think about lyrics at the moment. He places both of his hands on your face.

“Were you thinking about me, too?” he asks as if it isn’t obvious.

“Yeah. You’re so different. You look really different. Your hair and everything. I almost didn’t recognise you.”

“Is the way I am now bad?”

“No, you’re… you’re beautiful. Just like all your Black Roses tell you.”

“Are you a Black Rose?”

“I guess I am, yeah. A really lucky one.”

“I want to do something with you I can’t do with a Black Rose. Can you stop being a fan for a minute?”

You’re breathless. “What do you want to do?”

As if you don’t know.

As if you can’t anticipate him coming in closer.

You’re ready for more than the kind kiss on the cheek he gives you, but it still feels so wonderful and perfect.

“Don’t disappear again.” you plead with him. Sammy or Woosung, your ex-boyfriend or lead singer of The Rose, American citizen or Korean citizen, whatever he wanted to be you were fine with it. You knew life with him and you knew life without him. Now that you’ve been reminded of the perfection of his presence you never wanted to lose him again.

“I won’t. I’m yours forever.”

#woosung x reader #woosung scenarios #the rose scenarios #the rose x reader #open kpop scenario requests #kpop scenarios #Anonymous

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