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adhbabey · 1 year

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hope its ok im responding to ur post abt paych critical! it is so relatable! there are lots of things i appreciate abt the psych critical/antipsych community & movement but i also like. dont understand why in the world so many ppl are like overwhelmingly against therapy. obv it doesnt work for everyone! ik its not available or accessible for everyone! but its such a vast & varied field and such an adaptable thing that like. i don’t think i’ll ever get why ppl direct their anger towards those of us who *do* benefit from therapy or find it a useful tool for recovery. yknow. what good does infighting do!!! who does that serve!! this has turned into shouting into the void a little bit, sorry about that

Yeah it's fine. Honestly I'm pretty anti psych about a lot of things, like the fact that people are abused or mistreated in medical situations and that people are forced to take medication, have their rights stripped away, etc.

And I, too, hate that people call their partners by words taken from disorders. Like, you shouldn't call people "narcissistic" or "psychotic" as an insult. Pathologicizing abusers is just really fucking harmful and stupid. The whole thing is misunderstanding why those words exist in the first place and just scapegoating mentally ill people.

But this doesn't mean words like dissociation, triggers, panic attack, depression, manipulation, gaslighting, etc. don't have their purpose and it doesn't mean everyone is misusing them. And it is just stupid to assume everyone is, and that's the problem with some people who are anti-psych.

Some people view professional help and medical terms and diagnoses as bad, and it just makes them sound like the people they disagree with. I'm psych critical, not against helpful tools and professional treatment. They should be used with consent and with autonomy. Removing and gatekeeping information and resources is what's bad.

I'm extremely pro-self diagnosis. Partly because I am psych critical and partly because I think we have the intelligence to figure things out for ourselves. That crazy people aren't too crazy to know that they are "crazy". That we have the ability to recognize the fact that something is wrong.

Self diagnosing people aren't stupid for taking medical knowledge and applying it to themselves, they're not pathologicizing all human experiences, and I think that people who argue that are dumb.

So like. There is a middle ground that people aren't noticing, because they lean too heavily to one side. I can't function without medication, but I'm terrified of being institutionalized and my family is somewhat ableist, so I struggle to find an option to get help. I think most people on the internet have found themselves in similar situations.

So like, the whole "stop pathologizing human experience" and that people say "the tiktokification of the internet is bad", like bitch, we all loved Vine. The whole thing is just missing the understanding that people are striving for accessibility and education, not whoever the fuck that takes it too far.

So yeah, thanks for sending an ask to let me talk about this more. Therapy does not solve all your problems, especially if your therapist is not the right one. But it's something people should still try and seek. Maybe it's helpful, maybe it's not.

But the fact of the matter is, is that people are literally just using terms to understand their experiences. Sometimes they'll take it too far, but there is a middle ground. There will always be normal and reasonable opinions within it, we should listen.

#babey posts #psych critical

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flustersluts · 2 years

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i mean... preaching consent and reblogging noncon on the same blog isnt hypocrisy. its engaging in a kink that makes you personally uncomfortable. just bc something crosses your personal boundaries doesnt make it immoral. ik you were responding to hate but like. idk. i was hoping i wouldnt come onto tumblr to see my own kinks portrayed like they make me a bad person. or like practicing them consensually is hypocrisy and not, yknow, practicing kink in a safe, healthy, risk aware and consensual manner.

you were sent hate by someone who is going to hate you for having kinks no matter what they are. you don't have to shit on other ppls to respond to that. some of us are using it to cope with past sexual assault. we're not hypocrites and we're not predators.

hey, i take your point that it was tactless of me to discuss cnc w/o explaining my views

to be clear, my comment about the hypocrisy of cnc blogs was specifically aimed at hardcore r*peplay blogs. as someone who used to sh and looked at sh blogs (the kind that romanticise it), ig my opinions on one have influenced the other - although those blogs wld say that they didn't condone / support sh, they still enabled it by fostering a sense of community and acceptance around that was rlly harmful to a lot of ppl, myself included, and rlly warped my perception of it and how ppl saw it. there's obviously debate to be had abt whether ppl ever have an obligation not to post content bc said content is going to have negative consequences, but my stance is that ye, it's hypocritical to make content which could contribute to harmful behaviuor (r*pe, sh) even if you yourself don't support that behaviour.

at the same time i recognise that there's a lot of 'softer' cnc focusing more on carrying out fantasies with partners etc. i don't rlly know how to feel about that and i wldn't be surprised if it was a valid way to work thru trauma etc (similarly, i wldn't be surprised if it was usually more harmful than not). i don't want to see that content or have it on my blog but i don't feel like i know enough abt it to have a fully formed opinion on the morals of it

#rape #self harm #rape tw #self harm tw #sh #lmk if u need this tagged more specifically #also it's not that important but just to be clear - just bc i think smthn is a Bad Thing doesn't mean i think it makes u a bad person #ppl are complicated and ive done my fair share of Bad Things and yknow we live and we learn and shit's messy #not gna address that in the actual post bc ur point still stands ofc but i just wanna say that #while the above are my opinions on the phenomena of these blogs and how i feel abt it im not necessarily making absolute judgements on #ppl that run them #also @the other anon that sent a similar shorter ask #im not gna answer it bc i would just end up restating the things i say here. im not ignoring you but this is how i feel.#flusterasks

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bedazzlecuntmoved · 2 years

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2 and 19

KINK ASK GAME KINK ASK GAME!

2. What is a popular kink you've never really gotten into?

i do like degradation but there’s a specific brand of degradation i rly dont like. i don’t know how to articulate the difference, either. like i want to be degraded by being called a slut or stupid or useless except for my cunt, but not Disgusting or whatever. like the minute the meanness feels untied to kink or sexuality im like okay now ur just calling me ugly.

also, stuff like feet or anal or etc.

19. In what ways has kink positively impacted your life?

i feel like. so i got into online kink communities much younger than i should have for a variety of reasons ( the very short versions is csa = developing weird kinks too young = looking for community = adults without good boundaries being weird ) which i think did a lot of damage to me long term. but i think the fact that that happened sort of...i think NOW, at age twenty - six, i’m much more self - aware of myself, sexually, then i’d be otherwise? i wish that hadn’t happened, but yknow sometimes it just be like that, and the silver lining is that i had to do a lot of reflection about my kinks and my trauma and what was safe for me that would not have happened otherwise, and which i think has made me a much healthier person sexually.

on a more overtly positive way, kink communities, both online and IRL were the first where i really learned a fully articulated set of rules about consent which continue to be really useful — consent isn’t just a lot of a no, it’s a clear - headed and freely and safely given yes, etc etc.

#wren speaking!#wren answers!#i thought that was a tag. maybe not #csa ment /

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findroleplay · 6 months

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Heyy im Gabriel or Bëo 17yo, and I'm very bored at the moment. I'm currently looking for a partner/ppl fandomless RP. Because I don't like playing a character I didn't create and that I don't know well enough.

You should have +15 / -21yo~ as long as it's ok for everyone, I'm ok with mxm, not too comfortable with fxf and fxm, but I can still make the effort. I'm ok with OC's with handicapped people obviously, as long as everything is explained to me beforehand, so I can see how to play with it.

I accept any type of OC as long as it is credible in today's semi-fantastic world. Like elves, angels, démon, humans, with powers too ...etc without being too much. My oc for example is an elf who can control his body temperature, so he doesn't have a lot of impact. On the other hand I have another oc elf who can control water, if I decide to use him, I will end up having difficulty with his power to remaining coherent.

I love learning more about other people's oc's, I will be happy to talk about all this with the person concerned, I can even draw some if the desire and consent are there.

Also, for the NSFW, I accept the scenes before...yknow but not the act itself, because I am not comfortable writing it. Or even draw it to end up on the internet publicly.

It can be long-term, short scenes and not necessarily in the same universe, as long as there is communication, If there is a problem or something, I already had a problem with that and it was really not cool. so you have to be honest, normal.

I'm ok for RPs about daily life, very angsty, very fluff RPs, as long as there is life in our answers and a desire to develop, I'm ok for paragraphs 1 quite big, But also the quick responses when we are all connected.

To finish, I am connected every day, two months ago I will have RP every day (I did it for 2 whole years), but today I will be more moderate, you should not hesitate to remind me If I forget once or twice, it can happen on both sides obviously.

I am French and still at school, except on weekends and in the evening outside of holidays it will be complicated to be very very reactive, Do not hesitate to give me your schedule and everythings.

I write in English, don't hesitate to tell me if I'm making mistakes or something 💚

I RP on discord, #someonewarms (If you're scared or find it embarrassing, you can DM me on Instagram (SomeoneWarms) or just like this post, or just leave a comment? Dunno...I'm not old on Tumblr ahhah) and I'm ok for any scenario suggestion <3

(PS : safe place for queers, neuroA, etc, Don't be afraid I do not eat people, In any case not yet /j)

Example of drawings that I can make

Thank you for reading, even if it's not effective, it will have kept me busy ✨

-Someone Warms

#roleplay #rp #oc rp #original rp #fandomless rp #mxm rp #fantasy rp

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yoshkeii · 3 years

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Ushijima Wakatoshi hcs!

࿐ character: Ushijima Wakatoshi

࿐ genre: sfw, nsfw

࿐ requested by: a lovely supportive friend <3

⌦ sfw first, nsfw last

⌦ Nsfw includes, top-dom!ushijima, sub-bottom!reader. Continue at your own risk.

A/N: i simp for this man. i actually simp for a lot of characters its unbelievable. but this one. this man. yeah. again, kinda self-indulgent like my tsukii one- im sorry,,

══════ SFW ══════

★彡 Since we all know how Ushijima talks in the anime, he probably doesn't have the best social cues. When being in a relationship with him it might be difficult for him to break through that barrier of communication. He might say things along "will you teach me?", "was that good?", and stuff along those lines. So its your job to show him the ropes! It's a up and down hill path but Ushijima will do it to make the relationship last long and anything to see that little adorable smile on your face.

★彡 Honestly some nicknames he will have for you might derive from plants and nature. Such as "Honey(comb), Pumpkin, Sprout, Fern, Clover," but the classic nicknames that are normal to relationships would be "Babe/Baby, Prince, Love, Beautiful/Handsome," etc~ He likes to stick with the planty ones since he believes it fits someone smaller than him.

★彡 Will definitely take advantage of your size difference (depending on your height, yknow when yknow. i myself is like 5'3/5'4 so i feel the short pain.)

★彡 Like he will ruffle your hair which always ends up getting messed up, he will pick you so fucking easily like you weigh nothing to him, definite big spoon cause he always loves to wrap his arms arounds you since he noticed how safe it makes you feel, comparing and teasing about your hand sizes too is a common occurrence. Just his palm against yours. Sometimes you guys mess around with the flashlights on your phone to create hand-shadows and you always try to adjust your hand for your shadow to be Ushijima's size. He chuckles at the adorable attempt too.

★彡 Continuing on the size difference, he will let you sit on his lap as he watches you do whatever infront of him. No matter if its just scrolling through social media, watching videos, watching you play games, a movie, a video call? He's there. Sometimes will silently nuzzle his face into your hair, neck, shoulder or the crook between your shoulders. If he's feeling like it, he might also plant a surprise kiss on your neck or shoulder. It sends a quick jolt and shiver down your spine whenever he does because it's so unlikely-

★彡 OKAY BUT- the thought of jealous Ushijima would not be common thing knowing how calm and composed this man is, but he is also not good at describing nor showing emotions. But- Him catching you wearing someone else's jersey, hoodie, or jacket might flip that switch. He would just brush it off at first after awhile, before he slowly breaks. Giving you his own clothing in the end, which always ends up oversized based on how this dude is built. This would honestly be the only chance or time you will see this man be jealous its kinda scary- like- Ushijima are you okay honey?

★彡 Ushijima isn't the one to be into nicknames too much, but when you call him by the given nicknames you have for him... ohhhhhhh maaaaan its gives him butterflies. And generally he can't understand feelings too well so he wouldn't know how to deal with it and maybe overthink it- Please comfort him if it goes to far- He'll need it-

★彡 Like the Tendou chapter, you would most likely be closer to Tendou since Ushi and him are close anyways! You'll also have decent relationships with the team and maybe act like the motherly type to them to keep those boys in check. Goshiki may awkwardly talk to you to see if he needs to be in a relationship to be the new ace yada yada (lil baby looking up to your husbando though is cute-)

★彡 Ushijima may not be the best at social cues, but ohhh man this dude can be poetic as hell unintentionally. He has his ways of setting up words and his surprisingly sets of word choices astonish you at some point, and of course you get confuse sometimes- Understanding poems can be hard as hell okay??

★彡 When seeing you stressed or overwhelmed with any situation, he'll bring you into a hug for who knows how long. Just him seeing you like that devastates him, same goes for a single tear coming from your face will make this man go in his overprotective mode. He'll rub your back or head to calm you down, some specks of kisses along your face and maybe your arms too. He doesn't let his hand wander anywhere else when cuddling either so you are in safe hands with this man everytime he has his arms around you. They are just like safe warm walls bro.

★彡 He's the type who will keep attention on the smallest of details about you. He'll buy you small things like stickers, utensil, items, etc that you thought were cute when browsing or something. Ushijima likes to hear about your interests and thoughts because he loves to see you nerd out over passionate topics, and sometimes he'll just doze off and just stare at your face as you talk. Admiring you so fucking much, he's just softly smiling at you till you ask "what Toshi-?"

══════ NSFW ══════

★彡 Most of your passionate moments always start with kisses. They are usually or might as well always be slow, soft and passionate. He'll try his best to ask for consent in the most intimate or romantic way possible, with just a soft reply or the brush of his thumb on your bottom lip. Or he might aswell just stare at you till you say sumn-

★彡 He's not the type for PDA, since he personally thinks it should be behind doors and walls. So if you do anything that will.. yknow... flip a switch in this man. He'll try to keep composure n calmness till both of you are in a private spot, this man will kabedon or pin you against the wall and smother you with love n affection. At this point, he can't keep his hands to himself and often wanders which is unusual for him. So do things wisely or are you just a lover for punishment.

★彡 Some kinks this man will have: definite daddy/captain kink, degrading/praising (depends on his mood or how you are acting in the.. act-), extreme dirty talk, overstimulation maybe?, honestly can be into BDSM or sumn along the line, little bit of foreplay too.

★彡 You definitely know this man can get hella rough and strong while doing it. Which he of course uses it as an advantage because he's a fucking huge ass dom. Try to take control at least once, he'll do an uno reverse card on you and have you begging moments later. Even if you're on top, he still has control. He'll use his strong grip to pull you down or to make you move how he wants you too, His grip is so strong, it leaves nail marks in your hips n thighs that make you complain to him about it. But Ushijima just will look at you with no regret.

★彡 Ushijima uses his voice to his biggest advantage aswell. He knows he can rile you up with just a deep husk of his voice, especially when he speaks in your ear. His hot breath brushing against as he speaks sweet nothings to demanding whispers only you can hear. It just makes you melt and submit to him like magic, and he adores that to the max. He'll also might bite your ear as a tease too-

★彡 He's very demanding in bed. Ordering you around. Him being a very serious person outside of the room follows him into the bed.

★彡 Favorite place to do it? Just in the private walls of eachother's home or dorms.

★彡 Favorite position? He has a few selected one, but him carrying you will messing your insides up against a wall... yeah that one.

★彡 He loves, loves seeing your face during the act. He'll just stares at you with a cocky smirk (no pun intended) as he continues.

★彡 Ushijima may be rough, but he's a king at aftercare. He loves to treat you so well after the act with cuddles, kisses, a possible bath or shower, massages. Anything to calm you down. Usually its just cuddles, seeing you ontop of his chest practically about to fall asleep. Knowing you are listening to his heartbeat and breathing, its a beautiful sight to him. If you are cuddling on your side, he'll softly pat your head and rub your back as you dose off to sleep before he falls asleep himself afterwards.

★彡 Motivation can vary, but he loves seeing you wear anything that shows your bare legs. Especially those thighs. Yes another thigh man. Just some high-thigh socks, tights, fitted sweatpants, anything that shows your curves n legs gets him rearing to go.

#at-dusk;- 🌆#late-nights;- 🌃#folder 📁;- 𝙷𝚊𝚒𝚔𝚢𝚞𝚞 #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu x male reader #haikyuu x gender neutral reader #x reader #x male reader #ushijima wakatoshi x reader #ushijima wakatoshi x male reader #ushijima x reader #ushijima x male reader #ushijima wakatoshi #headcanon #haikyuu headcanons

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pigeontoez · 3 years

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Ok you've earned at least 25% more of my respect since you believe in leaving people (minors AND adults) who don't consent to it out of shipping/other invasive fandom stuff

Everyone seems to think I'm just a stick in the mud for thinking rpf is a bit creepy when the person/people it's about haven't given the go ahead or have outright said they didn't want to see it

ayyy. the only time i personally believe not leaving adults out of it is like, dead awful historical figures (as in like killed people with no just cause, raped, etc) or alive awful historical figures like Donald Trump. I’d be a hypocrite if I didn’t think that. jgiosdfjigo

But otherwise yeah if you’re favorite youtuber or whatever was like “hey i don’t like porn drawn of me, or fanfics” then like, just don’t do it yknow.

but yeah. it’s just called basic human respect. like yeah. if you’re famous you can’t control it sadly but it’s up to the community to be like “hey maybe don’t”.

#discourse?#discourse #rpf #rape mention

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cultleaderzukki · 4 years

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Could I get your advice on something? What’s a good way to kinda hint to partners/potential partners that you’re into GFD and similar things? Because on one hand I don’t wanna be the creepy dude in every domme’s DMs like “I know we’re complete strangers but please be my mistress you’re not like other girls also here’s my dick” but its also super awkward when I bring it up with an existing partner and they’re totally not into it or don’t get it. I just wanna do it right yknow?

“How do you feel about....” is a good way to bring it up. Being open in a relationship is super important. If you feel like you have to hide things are you guys really communicating in an open and sane way? I get that sitting down and talking about kinks can be awkward and it’s hard to get the ball rolling but sometimes the easiest and most effective way is to just talk to your partner. Tell them what you like about gfd/etc and ask for their opinion. If they consent then you’re all good. If they’re a little hesitant then respect that and give them some space to think about it. Treat talking about kink as if you’re talking about any other important matter. It’s all relative.

#askzukki

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stemcellee · 7 years

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Ok so I know a lot of colleges have already started (unless you are on the quarter system lmao) but here’s another “let’s talk about” blab post. Also kind of in honor of me moving into the dorms again in exactly two weeks :C

Read the one about staying healthy here!

Or, just read this one. Let’s talk about your life in the dorms (or maybe you sleep in the campus library but that’s on campus housing too, isn’t it?)

Things to Ask Your Roommates Did you go random? Did your school give you your roommate(s)’s contacts before moving in? If so, then try to contact them before moving in. It’s really exciting meeting the person(s) that you will be living with for the school year! And most of the time, they’re super excited about meeting you as well. If you are meeting them for the first time the day you move in, then these questions will still probably be great ice breakers for that first night.

Where are you from?

What’s your major? (typical question for literally everyone)

What are your sleeping habits? (as in, lights on/off, noises, temperature of the room, TIME, if they snore or something)

How do you feel about guests? (only have visitors are certain times, visitors welcome anytime, no preference, no overnight guests or etc etc)

How do you feel about alcohol/smoking? (most universities have strict rules but you know. it’s good to share preferences and stuff)

What are your study habits? (sounds, times dedicated to studying)

What’s your class schedule look like? (my roomies and i always printed up our schedules and hung them in the dorms. It’s actually super useful)

What are you bringing to the dorm that we can share? (aka stuff like microwaves, fridges, water kettles, irons, yknow the basics)

What side of the room/What bunk bed do you want?

Should I wake you up for your class if your alarm doesn’t go off?

Things to Bring to the Dorms (not at all a comprehensive list lmao needs change and are different)

Obvious stuff: Clothes, undies, bedding

Your electronics (laptop, chargers, tablet, phone, etc)

Bath necessities (toothbrush and paste, towel, toilet paper and what not)

Shower shoes

FLOSS, NAIL CLIPPERS

Tape and push pins

FIRST AID KIT

Your immunization records, your identification

Money

Snacks that have a long shelf life in case of emergency or just hunger (like dried or canned food)

A flashlight

WATER and refillable waterbottle

Sunscreen

Extension cords

Napkins/tissues/ziplock bags

Mirrors as needed

an Extra Set of sheets

General pain medication (like Advil), cold medicine, and your allergy/other personal medicines

Portable charger for your phone

Scissors!!

A refrigerator, microwave, hot water kettle, coffee maker, clothes iron, or something you realize will make your life easier

Laundry detergent

A seat cushion for your desk chair

Things that remind you of home/good times

Plates, bowls, utensils

Dealing With Problems Living on campus can suck sometimes for various reasons. However, see them as learning experiences that will prepare you for the real (Real) world when you leave college.

Getting sick: see this post

Roommate problems: sometimes, you and your roommate might not get along. It’s honestly nothing to be ashamed of because y’all are different people. But if they are doing something you really don’t like (like bringing people over when you are sleeping/studying, being loud, using your stuff, whatever), you have to be firm and tell them because sometimes, they won’t know what they’re doing wrong. Approaching them nicely and being clear is important. As roommates, you will have to accept that you all live in the same area and the space does not belong to just one of you. Make boundaries clear in the beginning, and be open to anything your roommate says to you. Peaceful roommate politics is the way to go.

Homesickness: living away from home can get to you. You might miss things that you never even thought you would miss. Dealing with homesickness is something the majority of college students living away from their home will experience, so it’s important to remember that you have others who feel the same way and you are not to struggle with the feeling alone. Calling home, writing emails/letters to home, or even planning what you want to do the next time you visit home are ways that help cope with homesickness.

Being safe: when you live away from parents or you live with a bunch of other people that you probably didn’t know before coming to campus, things can get overwhelming. Always be aware of your surroundings when you go out, or sometimes even in your residence hall. Keep your belongings safe by locking your door before leaving, or having a safe in your dorm. Wear your shower flip flops because the communal bathrooms can be gross. Always remember consent and remind others of consent. Know your limits with alcohol. This might be the first time that you live independent from guardians so you will be making every decision for yourself. Make sure your decisions keep you in a safe position!!

Report any issues with your dorm (malfunctions, theft, plumbing, electricity) to the front desk or to the housing authority immediately (this place is your home and hopefully you will love it like your home!)

Be courteous of others, like your neighbors/floormates. Respect each other and have fun!

Resources Here are just rando things that I learned to do while living on campus lol

Take a few extra napkins from dining halls and store them in your room. Napkins are useful and this can save you money (i mean in the end you are paying for dining hall services so might as well use the napkins)

Same thing with disposable utensils

Get to know your floormates because they might have the same classes as you and you can study with them!

Always have your roommate(s)’s number saved in your phone

Learn the best (or most private) times to use the bathrooms (lol)

Take advantage of the free stuff (we always got free stuff from our resident assistants/the school because of special events. I got free mason jars, free SUCCULENTS ((that died bc I can’t take care of them)), free FOOD, free shirts etc)

Have a REallly long phone charging cable and a little hanging bucket/hanging bag if you have a top bunk. It makes life easier.

If you’re the kind to plop into bed and be unproductive, consider top bunk. It sucks having to climb in and out so you’ll probably stay out of it (luls)

I’ve exhausted all that I can really think of for now, so I hope that helps! Living in the dorms is supppperr exciting and fun if you make the most out of it!

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