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barrelcat · 1 year

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Lunistice and Celeste

Warning: possible spoilers ahead. I'm really just covering my bases, here.

Note: I wrote this piece a couple weeks ago, but the holidays got the better of me. Better late than never, eh?

I’ve always enjoyed platformers. Super Mario World and Donkey Kong Country were the first games I ever played. In recent years, I’ve found myself drawn further and further from this staple of gaming genres, compelled by the frenetic energy of first-person shooters and complex storytelling role-playing games. But I made a deal with myself a few months ago to begin existing outside of what had become my gaming comfort zone. Part of that involved returning to my roots and diving into some platformers.

There have been two so far.

Celeste

The only reason I tried this one was because of this video. (Side note: love the Wulff Den. One of my favorite YT channels. Go check them out.) And I’ll tell you what: Bob’s right. This is an amazing game. It’s so amazing that the finer details are lost on me. I can say that the controls are tight and exact. The main character, Madeline, has just the right amount of weight when falling and jumping, and her abilities to dash and wall hop are satisfying once you learn to pull them off with grace (which I came close to… sometimes). The story sees you attempting to climb Mount Celeste, whose interior is filled with all manner of jumping puzzles and traps that Madeline must overcome. The ascent itself represents other challenges in Madeline’s life, chiefly the anxiety and depression she’s experienced until now. Reaching the peak ends up being as much of a victory for the player (for navigating the tangible challenges of the mountain) as it is for Madeline herself (for overcoming the personal challenges represented by platforming and the other characters she meets along the way). The final scene is a wonderful blend of sincerity and relief.

This game is also difficult. Sure, I conquered the mountain (excluding the Epilogue that probably needs you to gather so many of a certain collectible in order to unlock), but it ran me ragged in the process. Madeline can only suffer one strike from an enemy or harmful part of the environment before she fails in a given section before being teleported back to the last checkpoint. Any progress (moving blocks, hitting switches, etc) is also reset, forcing you to memorize the features of the area in order to navigate and move on successfully. Honestly, if this reset didn’t happen almost instantaneously, my time with the game would have been very short. Instead, I forged on and found that I enjoyed every bit of my experience, even when I failed the final jump in a puzzle and had to be sent to the beginning again. Overcoming the most challenging sections was truly exhilarating, and getting to see my death count at the end of each chapter was nothing short of hilarious. For the final tally, see the screenshot below.

Celeste is fantastic, and I may return to the mountain at some point in the future to see what else the Epilogue can offer me. If anything, I’ll definitely be keeping an eye out for the developer’s next title, Earthblade.

youtube

Edit: During the chaos that is the holidays, I ended up playing Celeste quite a bit. Whenever there was downtime during family functions, it was the easiest game to jump into for a few minutes at a time. Suffice to say that I was able to earn a few more strawberries than shown above.

Lunistice

The SNES was my first gaming console, but the N64 came out when I was seven. We spent the most time together during my younger years. That’s when I was exposed to 3D platformers like Banjo-Kazooie and Donkey Kong 64, both of which I rank among my favorite titles from then. Lunistice mimics both of these in form and function, without verging into manic collectathon territory. Mind you, there is still collecting, but it is much diminished.

I first heard about Lunistice from this video from Nintendo Life (another great YT channel that you should also check out if you haven’t), and I agree with almost all of what Alex has to say. This is a platformer built in the 3D style of those “simpler” titles which has also adopted the tight controls of modern day gaming. Everything feels exact and balanced, and is generally easier than Celeste, but that didn’t detract from my enjoyment. The protagonist, Hana, is a tanuki who navigates the various challenges she encounters with a double-jump and a spin attack, the latter allowing her to stay airborne when used properly. There are enemies present in all levels of the game, but they’re less geared toward traditionally attacking, and act more like roadblocks that hinder progress if not dealt with in a strategic manner. They roll around in predetermined routes, float in midair between platforms, and in the handful of areas where Hana is allowed a rest between jumps, they home in on your location, forcing you to either dodge or defend yourself.

The worlds of Lunistice are vast and colorful, featuring themes and details from Hana’s life to fill the landscape. These levels are linear, though, with colored paper cranes dotting your path and leading you toward the end. Some veer off the main avenue, calling you to attempt gathering the other collectible, one of four floating letter tiles present in each world. All together, they spell Hana’s name. Once you find all of the tiles in a given world, they provide details about the story by unlocking dossiers and other “documents” that you can read between levels. Gathering all of the paper cranes averaged with the amount of deaths Hana experiences (from falling off the level, getting hit by too many enemies, etc) assigns a letter grade for that level. Aligning with the majority of gaming letter grades, the highest you can earn is an S for Superior. It was fairly easy to get an S for total cranes collected, but as for deaths… B’s are still good, right? I did collect everything, though.

Like I said, much easier than Celeste.

Of the two, I enjoyed Celeste more. Lunistice was a callback to the games that made my childhood what it was, but working to overcome the challenges presented in Celeste and then actually succeeding felt like more of an accomplishment. As a writer and story focused gamer, I also felt more attached to Madeline by the end of her adventure.

Both were a pleasant homecoming to the genre, and I’m looking forward to more.

#barrel blog #lunistice #celeste game #nintendo switch #platformers #switch #video games #video game collecting #2d platformer #3d platformer #Youtube

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curiousaboutchange · 1 year

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It's been almost a month since Module 1, so I thought I'd do a quick recap of what I've been up to.

Being coached: I had a couple of sessions over the past few weeks, which were both great.

One of them resulted in me booking in a whole day a month to do things just for myself (eg clothes shopping, hair cut, culture, leisure, health), and I finally had my first "identity day" today, whoop, whoop. I went for a haircut (first one since I had my kids... and it's Alani's 5th birthday this week!!!) and went shopping. I really wanted to find a few outfits, but then after aimless browsing in the shopping mall I got frustrated and I really struggled to find anything. It didn't feel like me at all. Bright lights, new clothes, expensive (even the stuff from China). So rather than forcing it, I decided to head to the charity shops (I had found some amazing things there before).... and in the 45 minutes I had left before picking up the kids, I managed to find 4 whole outfits (dress, skirt, trousers, tops, t-shirt) and a bright cushion for my 'space' and a bag of really cool bright baubles. All of that for 20 quid. And the best bit, this completely honoured some of my core values... creativity and freedom of expression / choice while also being kind to the environment (and the wallet) and for a good cause, what's not to like?! Thanks Fozia*!

The other session was to find out about what creativity and being a creative practitioner means to me and how I can include this core value in my daily life. A lovely insight which came from it was that I am actually in the great position to be able to do creative things as and when I please and to celebrate this freedom by experimenting with small creative projects and even parenting (eg, doing things differently). I will definitely set things up so I can do some hands-on work in the space I'd created for my coaching sessions. I can also use this as a way to meditate and to replace aimless browsing on my phone with something I enjoy.... Thanks Claire*! *my coach for this session.

Coaching: Apart from being coached, I also managed to squeeze in a couple of full-length sessions, as well as a 20 minute practice session at the practice cafe I attended last Thursday. I used STOKeRS (from Simplifying Coaching) for all sessions, which helped me massively to get the conversation started. While it was a good approach, I think I need to make the questions my own and I'd like it to sound more natural - it all felt a bit staged. On the first 2 sessions I did very little reflecting back, which was missing, so I tried to bring this element into the conversation at the practice cafe, which was well received. I think my strength is to be able to hold the space and listen actively and the feedback was that I was able to create a very calm atmosphere, allowing the thinker to open up, which then lead to new insights. I am proud that I managed to create / realise coaching opportunities which came up, sometimes out of the blue (even if it meant being out of my comfort zone). This is the only way I will learn new things. NO GUTS, NO GLORY!!!!

Anyway, some other things I want to mention here (separate blog posts may be required for an in-depth reflection, me thinks): Book: How to get clients by Steve Chandler

Coaches Uncaged: The Coaches’ Mindset Clinic (recording) September Special: "Money Mindset for Coaches" with Sachin Sharma and Alex"

Coaches Uncaged: The Coaches’ Mindset Clinic (recording) October: "The Coaches' Mindset Clinic" with Sachin Sharma and Rajni

Coaches Uncaged video: Interview with Bronwyn Nash "Using Instinct and Values to Shape a Successful Coaching Practice and Authentic Life"

Animas ICF Core Competencies: Competency 7: Evoking Awareness with Nishe Patel (recording)

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oddfleur · 2 years

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9/6/2022 9:15 PM

i’m late! whoops. had too much fun over the weekend with friends to think, let alone write about anything introspective.

it’s not entirely over yet, but it’s been a transformational summer, full of death and dissipation (both literally and not). death of family, unhealthy attachments, and previous beliefs/comfort zones. and a whole lot of grieving nonlinearly for those things. but most importantly, it has felt purposeful. with any kind of death comes regeneration. i did not want any of the changes that came my way when they did and even tried to reject them, but i’m so appreciative of them now. i feel closer to myself. i feel one step closer to the person i want to be. i feel better equipped for whatever comes next. i feel incredibly grateful for those close to me. i feel genuinely happy for things that i never thought i could. i feel a sense of clarity after giving up on trying to force it out of anything. something i always find myself wondering is if people are changed entirely by one small change. like adding a tiny amount of black to blue paint. or do people stay generally the same because no matter how many changes are made, a person will always contain the old versions of themselves and can never fully be anyone else. i think i believe that both are true depending on perspective, and that perspective determines regeneration. i know someday the cycle will repeat and i’ll probably have to learn this lesson over again in a more complex way, but i feel free for now. i feel a little less shame and lot more connected to what really matters to me.

i feel truly happy for release. i feel happy for the reunion of my exemplary great grandparents. i feel happy for everyone who is moving on everyday incrementally, understanding and reconfiguring pain. i feel happy for growing (up) and learning. i feel more accepting of the likelihood of falling behind and picking back up. i feel more secure in myself. i love my desire to make it better. i love that i don’t have to perfect anything. i love that i’m taking my sweet time and feeling what needs to be felt. i feel so much love for so much and it hurts me to not honor that and be loud about it. i can identify that i can be a very negative influence when i feel scared, but it does the opposite of protecting me from anything, so i’m working toward neutrality and at the very least not withdrawing. i’m figuring it out.

1. Pools - Glass Animals (shake my little soul for youuuuu)

2. The Whole of the Moon - The Waterboys

3. McKenzie - Houndmouth

4. Don’t Worry About the Government - Talking Heads

5. the mystic - Nilüfer Yanya

6. Whatever Fits Together - Skullcrusher

7. Which Witch - Florence and the Machine

8. Ignore Tenderness - Julia Jacklin

9. Medicine Burn - Yves Tumor

10. TWIRL - Whitney

<3 p.s.

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joydone07 · 2 years

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Pt. 1 (No Taglist)

For @11thgradewriter I apologize for this coming so late.

Thank you @izanae for beta reading

Things… were not going as planned.

Playing damsel, for one thing, was completely out of Marinette’s comfort zone. She was a heroine for kwamis sake, like she’d ever need to be saved. She had faced death head on time after time, and was still there to tell the tale, even though she probably never would, but it was the thought that counted.

But there she was, pouting in Super Jr’s arms as she was taken out of her burning apartment complex. To be honest, Marinette wasn’t quite sure what happened, just that one minute she was debating over the fact whether she should go ahead and sleep, or complete the commission, and the next, she saw a blazing fire eating up at her door.

Quickly grabbing everything of value, and quietly thanking whoever that the Miracle Box was more compact than the egg had been before, Marinette went towards the window, jumping when the fire alarm finally began wailing.

Once opened, Marinette was face to face with Superboy, the younger one, with a smile way too bright for the current situation. Knowing it would do no good to squirm away, she resigned herself to her fate.

“Good evening!” He exclaimed cheerfully, “I hope you were having a good day, at least before all of this.”

Unable to keep the frown on her face, she hesitantly smiled back. “Good evening to you as well. And we’re being honest, my day was pretty shitty, even before all of this happened, which is pretty much the cherry on top.”

Flying around towards the front of the building, the smile got a bit smaller, but didn’t lose any of its brightness.

“Well that sucks. I’m sorry if any of your things get ruined. This really isn’t your day.”

Chuckling at the boy’s sincerity, Marinette replied, “it’s fine, I got what was most important to me out, and the only thing that will be really lost to me is my work. My clients should understand, and besides, the most they can do is ask for their money back.”

Watching as the fire department went to work putting out the fire, Marinette finally began to realize all of the eyes on her, and blushed brighter than her ladybug suit.

Having heard the increase in heartbeat, Superboy inquired what was wrong, only to be told that it was because of all of the eyes which made him finally realize it as well.

With a blush covering the both of their faces, they cast their eyes downward, not enjoying all of the attention, despite being used to it. They both stood there looking awkward, not sure of what else to do. Marinette quite obviously couldn’t go in yet, and now that the firefighters had arrived, all Superboy could do was either watch, or just go ahead and leave.

Looking away from the ground, back up at Marinette, his blush returned full force seeing that she was looking as well. There was an awkward moment where they were both fumbling for something to say, before they ended up reaching the same conclusion.

“I never asked your name,”

“I don’t think I’ve introduced myself,”

It was silent for a few seconds, before they both burst out with laughs, drawing the attention back onto them, but were too engrossed with themselves to realize it.

“Well, let’s try this again, hi, my name is Marinette.”

With a smile on his face, he responded, “Good evening, Marinette, it’s super nice to meet you!” Catching his pun a second too late, he tried to take it back, “Wait no, I meant it’s nice to meet you, not super! I mean, while it is super great to meet you, I didn’t mean to say super?” With the end getting slightly higher, it came out like a question, making Marinette giggle.

“It’s nice to meet you too, Superboy.”

Mortified beyond belief, Superboy was about ready to fly off, straight into the sun, as to hopefully forget that the interaction ever happened. Right as he was about to go ahead and go, the firefighters as well as the police claimed that most of the building was still alright to go in, but the rest would have to find accommodations elsewhere, which was kind of rude, as Marinette was the only one living in the unsafe area.

Knowing that his family had raised him better than to leave a lady in need, heavens know what his grandmother would have done, he cleared his throat, asking politely, “Would you like to be taken to a hotel, Marinette? It is Metropolis after all, and I could get you one pretty cheap.”

Once again with a smile on her face, Marinette offered her thanks and allowed herself to be led away.

——

After walking a decent amount away from the apartment, Superboy asked if it would be alright to carry her the rest of the way, as it was Metropolis and while it sure as hell wasn’t Gotham, crime still occurred, especially for beautiful young women like herself.

Realizing that he was trying to give her a subtle compliment under the guise of pure concern, Marinette agreed, even though it would still end up cutting her time with him short. The time that passed was much too quick, and dropping down in front of the hotel lobby, Superboy wanted nothing more than to give her a kiss along with his phone number, but he knew he couldn’t.

About to bid her a goodnight, Marinette softly pulled his cape down, “Meet me on the roof in an hour,” let go, and walked through the doors. He was glad that she hadn’t glanced back, as his face turned the red est it had been that night.

“Yes!” He shouted, looking forward to the rooftop visit.

#maribat #marijon #fic swap

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miraculouscontent · 3 years

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Who wants more sad statistics~?

Because say hello to the color-coded guide to Marinette blame/mistakes! Obviously there’s some room for debate (even I struggled with how to color an episode from time to time), but it should be mostly accurate.

Blue = "Marinette wasn't really blamed for anything notable and didn't really suffer from Adrien" Cyan = "Marinette was blamed for something unrelated to Adrien that she didn't do/she shouldn't be made to feel bad for" (this one is probably the most subjective) Green = "Marinette was blamed/made a mistake but it had nothing to do with Adrien" Yellow = "Marinette doesn't technically make a mistake or get blamed, but is negatively impacted by her crush on/relationship to Adrien" Red = "Marinette either was blamed for/made a mistake that related to Adrien."

"Negatively impacted by her crush on Adrien" could mean generally anything, but it leans towards Marinette embarrassing herself in front of Adrien, characters making snippy/unnecessary comments about her crush, and things that wouldn't have happened if her Adrien crush didn't exist. In the case that Marinette makes a mistake/is improperly blamed for something not about Adrien (cyan/green) but also is negatively impacted by her relationship to him (yellow), whatever is given more attention will take priority. There could've easily been a lot of cyan+red episodes had I allowed myself to use two colors.

Now look at all that red, which is easily the most frequent color, and then try and tell me that Marinette's crush isn't just a tool to humiliate her and force her to make mistakes in order to fit the "Marinette makes a mistake" quota.

I've put the explanations below on my decisions for each episode, as well as the tally for everything together:

Season 1

"Stormy Weather" (red) - Marinette blames herself for leaving Manon, and they're only at the park in the first place because of her Adrien crush.

"The Bubbler" (red) - Marinette uses Lucky Charm explicitly to stop Chloe and Adrien from dancing together.

"The Pharoah" (green) - Ladybug drops her schoolbook; relatively minor in the grand scheme of things, but seems to be why the show forces Marinette to awkwardly try to keep Alya in the museum instead of just having Tikki directly point out where to go.

"Lady Wifi" (green) - Marinette overslept while doing homework and was late for class

"Timebreaker" (cyan) - Marinette is blamed for not being home to give the cake to Nadja... who came early and thus Marinette shouldn't have been expected to expect her

"Mr. Pigeon" (yellow) - Marinette embarrasses herself in front of Adrien, with Alya making faces at her all the while

"The Evillustrator" (cyan) - Marinette is blamed for ditching Sabrina when she has an akuma to worry about, accused of "being like Chloe" (i.e: the person who Sabrina immediately goes back to anyway)

"Rogercop" (red) - Marinette, after being accused, states that everyone has the potential to be guilty, but sidesteps Adrien when someone suggests it

"Copycat" (red) - Marinette, panicked by an embarrassing confession she left on Adrien's phone (thanks to Alya), steals it to delete the message (also thanks to Alya)

"Dark Cupid" (red) - Marinette forgets to sign the love letter addressed to Adrien, which Alya laughs at her for

"Horrificator" (red) - Marinette is pressured/convinced to play Mylene's role instead when Alya throws out that she'd be kissing Adrien

"Darkblade" (cyan) - Marinette doesn't want to run for class representative because she already has enough on her plate (...what a monster?); both Alya and Alix make snarky comments at her for this

"The Mime" (green) - Marinette deletes a video on Alya phone and spends the rest of the episode trying to recreate it

"Kung Food" (cyan) - Marinette blames herself for defending her great uncle and insulting Chloe (again... what a monster?), which leads to Chloe sabotaging Wang's cooking

"Gamer" (red) - Marinette enters the gaming competition solely for Adrien

"Animan" (yellow) - Marinette offers to get Nino a date with Alya, an event that wouldn't have taken place if not for Marinette's crush (either there wouldn't have been a zoo trip at all or Alya wouldn't have been there); in addition, Alya tells Nino about Marinette's Adrien crush, which Marinette is distraught by

"Antibug" (cyan) - Ladybug is blamed for "not accepting help from others" (except she did at the beginning of the episode) and not listening to Chloe (who is a habitual liar)

"The Puppeteer" (green) - Marinette folds to Manon's "baby doll eyes" and gives her something that Nadja insisted she not have

"Reflekta" (green) - Marinette tries to steal Guiseppe's SD camera card so Juleka's picture will need retaken

"Pixelator" (red) - Marinette shirks her job as Jagged's gopher in order to get back to Adrien as soon as possible

"Guitar Villain" (blue) - Not much happens, just cool Marinette stuff; there are technically scenes of Marinette embarrassing herself around Adrien, but either no one else was there to witness it or there wasn't any significant reaction to it

"Princess Fragrance" (red) - Alya forces Marinette to go talk to Adrien, which results in Marinette tripping and losing Tikki

"Simon Says" (cyan) - Marinette... I guess is at fault for struggling to keep up with schoolwork and hero duties? That's what you get for wanting to help people, Ladybug

"Volpina" (red) - Marinette is mocked for being jealous, her following Adrien is presented as her doing it jealously (she literally says that she's going to warn Adrien about Lila stealing the book from him before Tikki stops her, but okay), and she yells at Lila as Ladybug, which is also presented as being "only about Adrien."

"Origins - Part 1 (Ladybug & Cat Noir)" (green) - Ladybug neglects to capture the akuma, having forgotten that detail

"Origins - Part 2 (Stoneheart)" (green) - The mistake from Part 1 carries over... the episode also may or may not blame Marinette for encouraging Ivan.

blue - 1 cyan - 6 green - 7 yellow - 2 red - 10

Season 2

"A Christmas Special" (red) - Marinette's "Adrien blindness" causes her to jump to conclusions and believe that a Santa Claus lookalike is an akuma

"The Collector" (red) - Marinette lies to Master Fu in order to protect Adrien, not able to believe that Adrien could be Hawk Moth

"Despair Bear" (red) - Marinette goes to Chloe's party for Adrien and is repeatedly mocked/teased for this

"Prime Queen" (cyan) - Ladybug "makes a mistake" in getting upset at Nadja for trying to pry into her romantic relationships and her potential romance with Chat Noir

"Befana" (cyan) - Marinette is blamed for "lying" to her grandmother about going to a birthday party with her friends (she didn't) and "not wanting to spend time with her" (she did, Gina is the one who neglected Marinette for literal years)

"Riposte" (cyan) - One of the more subjective ones, but going frame-by-frame, Adrien's saber bends first yet the episode calls Marinette "flustered" and "new to fencing" to say that she's wrong in her choice

"Robostus" (blue) - Mostly free of crush and mistakes, episode focuses primarily on the main plot of the akuma being caused (if I had a color for Marinette just normally being mocked/embarrassed though, it'd be here)

"Gigantitan" (red) - Needs no explanation: Marinette is embarrassed in front of the girls multiple times and the entire subplot causes the akuma that almost hits Gorilla

"The Dark Owl" (green) - Ladybug orchestrates a situation in which the Dark Owl could save her so as to not hurt his feelings, which ends in him being found out, humiliated, and akumatized

"Glaciator" (red) - Marinette is upset because Adrien didn't show up to get ice cream with her, which leads to her blowing up on Andre

"Sapotis" (blue) - Marinette goes largely blameless for everything; not much here

"Gorizilla" (yellow) - Multiple "jokes"/"mocking" about Marinette revealing skin/being in her pajamas in front of Adrien

"Captain Hardrock" (blue) - Surprisingly void of blame on Marinette despite her being depressed over Adrien; if anything, Luka apologizes for making a teasing comment when she was upset

"Zombizou" (cyan) - Marinette is blamed for being upset with Chloe for ruining her gift for Miss Bustier

"Syren" (cyan) - Ladybug is blamed for keeping secrets from Chat Noir (look at the Adrien stans for reference)

"Frightningale" (red) - Marinette is bothered by Chloe being Ladybug, but Adrien is involved so the fandom can easily put blame on her concerning her Adrien crush (see Marinette salters for reference)

"Troublemaker" (red) - Marinette's Adrien pictures are intentionally inflated/exaggerated to humiliate her more

"Anansi" (green) - I wouldn't argue if someone suggested that this is a cyan: Marinette "makes a mistake" in cheating Nora's arm-wrestle with Nino since Nora was being unreasonable

"Sandboy" (green) - Marinette agrees with Tikki that they should do something to help Nooroo without asking Fu

"Reverser" (cyan) - Marinette peeks at Marc's work and tries to help him work with Nathaniel (I see, so when Alya meddles to push Marinette past her comfort zone, it's fine, but--); she also embarrasses herself in front of Adrien over this

"Frozer" (red) - Marinette suffers because Adrien's an idiot and has tons of people in relationships to ask advice from, and he chooses to ask Marinette; Marinette appears to be "blamed" for either wanting to move on (due to the girls fighting) or agreeing to go with Adrien, along with a "bonus" (almost earning a cyan) due to Chat throwing a hissy fit over her rejecting him

"Style Queen" (cyan) - Marinette is blamed for thinking that the magic ladybugs would bring the miraculous back to Fu (see "Sentibubbler" covering for Chat for reference on how the narrative sees this)

"Queen Wasp" (cyan) - Carried over from "Style Queen"; Ladybug is blamed for losing the miraculous

"Malediktator" (red) - Marinette is made to feel bad for being glad that her bully of many years is gone (almost earning a cyan here, or even a yellow), and this is all due to Adrien; he also unintentionally convinces her to give Chloe a miraculous (her "mistake" according to future episodes), which sets off a slew of events that makes her suffer

"Catalyst" (cyan) - Alya not believing Marinette due to her Adrien crush carries over from "Volpina," almost earning this a red, but Marinette also lies about her gift for Heroes' Day. However, the fact that she is completely sleep-deprived from the night before and was being made fun of for only bringing macarons is largely ignored by the narrative and treated too much as her fault

"Mayura" (red) - When going to correct her mistake from last episode, Adrien throwing a pity party for himself makes Marinette go back on it

blue - 3 cyan - 9 green - 3 yellow - 1 red - 10

Season 3

"Backwarder" (red) - Marinette gives Adrien the wrong letter (due to each slip of paper she has conveniently looking the exact same but the episode clearly indicates it to be her fault); she's also humiliated over this

"Weredad" (cyan) - Marinette lies to Chat Noir in a panic to protect her identity. The fact that Chat Noir is an idiot who wonders why Marinette might be on her own darn balcony and that Tikki doesn't offer a better solution for the situation is given no attention

"Chameleon" (red) - Alya believing that Marinette is only upset with Lila over Adrien presumably carries over from "Volpina" and "Catalyst;" Marinette's relationship with Adrien also seems to make her more inclined to believe in what he says about doing nothing about Lila

"Animaestro" (red) - No explanation needed; Marinette's Adrien crush makes her more inclined to believe Chloe (remember "Malediktator" and "Zombizou"?) when Chloe claims that Kagami stole her seat next to Adrien, which convinces Marinette to team up with Chloe against Kagami, and this leads to Marinette being embarrassed over her crush

"Bakerix" (green) - Marinette makes a mistake in... I guess riling up her grandfather? (this one's pretty subjective and I wouldn't argue with anyone who says this should be cyan)

"Silencer" (blue) - Regardless of what "Crocoduel" says, Marinette isn't blamed in this episode for challenging Bob Roth

"Oblivio" (cyan) - Marinette seems to weirdly be blamed/punished for getting upset with Chat Noir if the smugness of Chat+Alya about the taken picture is to be believed (perhaps """explained""" in "Reflekdoll" about Chat having his role to play as the "sense of humor")

"Stormy Weather 2" (yellow) - Marinette spends a portion of the episode sulking about the little progress she's made with Adrien

"Reflekdoll" (red) - Needs no explanation: Marinette's anxiety is caused by Adrien and she's blamed for it despite Alya orchestrating everything

"Oni-Chan" (red) - Marinette chases after Adrien and Lila, which is made to be completely about Marinette's crush on Adrien despite Marinette telling Tikki about her actual concerns (which end up coming true as Kagami gets akumatized)

"Miraculer" (cyan) - Chat gets snippy with Ladybug for not telling Chloe right away (apparently assuming that Ladybug doesn't have other obligations to attend to like school; she even tells Chat that she "wouldn't have time that day"), and Ladybug was literally about to before the sentimonster and Miraculer show up

"The Puppeteer 2" (red) - Marinette repeatedly pushed and punished for liking Adrien, then punished again in front of Adrien (who she thinks is a statue) when she was actually just taking the advice that Tikki gave her

"Desperada" (red) - The guitar scene (i.e: "huh, who would've known that my wingwoman for Adrien was actually trying to wingwoman me with Luka one time!"), Aspik (i.e: "wow, the guy who I thought was perfect because that's what the narrative is always telling me actually doesn't fit what the narrative was telling me!"), and that's all I need to say

"Startrain" (blue) - Mostly mistakeless on Marinette's end; the focus is on other characters/plots (again, if I had a color for Marinette being mocked/embarrassed though, it'd also go here)

"Kwamibuster" (blue) - Marinette isn't blamed for anything; even though Master Fu isn't aware of the events at first, Tikki apologizes to Marinette in front of him later

"Feast" (yellow) - Marinette is briefly distracted by Adrien until Alya chides her so that she can show Marinette the information she might as well have hand-delivered to Hawk Moth

"Ikari Gozen" (red) - Marinette tries to sabotage her and Kagami to prevent Kagami from meeting up with Adrien

"Timetagger" (cyan) - Tikki notes Marinette's bad excuses (which are due to the sheer amount of akuma) to the point where Alya had replaced her as babysitter before Marinette explained that she couldn't show up (I wouldn't argue with anyone who said this should be blue instead)

"Party Crasher" (red) - Marinette tries to crash the secret boys-only party in order to spend time with Adrien

"Gamer 2.0" (cyan) - Marinette+Ladybug is blamed for being upset that they have no time for anything, with Ladybug in particular "making the mistake" of taking over and failing due to Chat constantly goofing off despite her urging

"Chat Blanc" (red) - Marinette is pressured/threatened by the girl squad (specifically Rose) enough that she decides to sneak into Adrien's house

"Felix" (yellow) - Marinette, after "finally" confessing to Adrien (for like--the fourth time), ends up running off and rambling in front of Luka (not knowing that he's there), which embarrasses her

"Ladybug" (red) - Alya's doubts of Marinette's hatred of Lila (implied in "Volpina" and stated in "Catalyst" to be about her crush on Adrien) carries over as Alya chides Marinette for blaming Lila, and had Marinette not listened to Adrien in "Chameleon," Lila may have been stopped early on and she wouldn't have gotten expelled (otherwise, the episode would've gotten a "cyan" because how dare Marinette be emotional at being accused of cheating and get angry at Lila)

"Christmaster" (red) - Marinette lies to Chris (in the exact way that Alya does to Manon in "Stormy Weather" but sure) in order to protect her darn privacy so Chris doesn't find out about her chest full of Adrien gifts, which leads to Chris getting akumatized

"Heart Hunter" (red) - Ladybug neglects to detransform due to being distracted by Adrimi happening, which leads to long-lasting and overly harsh consequences

"Miracle Queen" (red) - Ladybug's mistake carries over from the previous episode

blue - 3 cyan - 5 green - 1 yellow - 3 red - 14

Total: blue - 7 cyan - 20 green - 11 yellow - 6 red - 34

#category: salt

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thedeadhandofseldon · 3 years

Text

The Anti-Mercer Effect

On the Accessibility of D&D, Why Unprepared Casters is so Fun, and Why Haley Whipjack is possibly the greatest DM of our generation.

(Apologies to my mutuals who aren’t in this fandom for the length of this, but as you all know I have never in my life shut up about anything so… we’ll call it even for the number of posts about Destiel I see every day.

To fellow UC fans - I haven’t listened to arc 4 yet, I started drafting this in early August, and I promise I will write a nice post about how great Gus the Bard is once I get the chance to listen to more of his DMing).

Structure - Or, “This is not the finale, there will be more podding cast”

So, first of all, let’s just talk about how Unprepared Casters works. Because it’s kind of unusual! Most of the other big-name D&D podcasts favor this long, grand arcs; UC has about 10 hours of podcast per each arc. And that’s a major strength in a lot of ways: it makes it really accessible to new listeners, because you can just start with the current arc and understand what’s going on!

And by starting new arcs every six or seven episodes, they can explore lots of ways to play D&D! Classic dungeon delve arc! Heist arc! Epic heroes save the world arc! Sportsball arc! They can touch on all sorts of things!

And while I’m talking about that: Dragons in Dungeons, the first arc, makes it incredibly accessible as a show - because it lets the unfamiliar listener get a sense of what D&D actually is. (It’s about telling stories and making your friends feel heroic and laugh and cry, for the record). If I had to pick a way to introduce someone to the game without actually playing it with them, that arc would definitely be it.

And I’d be remise not to note one very important thing: Haley Whipjack and Gus the Bard are just very funny, very charismatic people. Look. Episode 0s tend to be about 50%(?) those two just talking to each other about their own podcast. It shouldn’t work. And yet it DOES, its one of my favorite parts, because Haley and Gus are just cool.

And a side note that doesn’t fit anywhere else: I throw my soul at him! I throw a scone at him - that’s it, that’s the vibe. The whole podcast alternates between laughing with your friends and brooding alone in a dark tavern corner - but the laughs never forced and the dark corner is never too dark for too long.

Whipjack the Great - Or, the DM is Also a Player!

I think Haley Whipjack is one of the greatest Dungeon Masters alive. The plots and characters! The mechanical shenanigans! The descriptions!

Actually, let’s start there: with the descriptions. (Both Haley and Gus do this really fucking well). As we know, Episode 0 of each arc sees the DM reading a description - of a small town, or the Up North, or the recent history of a great party. And Haley always strikes this tricky balance - one I think a lot of us who DM struggle with - between giving too much description and worldbuilding, and not telling us anything at all. She describes people and events in just enough detail to imagine them, but never so much they seem static and unreal - just clear enough to envision, but with enough vagueness left to let your imagination begin to run wild.

While I’m thinking about arc 3’s party, let’s talk about a really bold move she made in that arc: letting the players have ongoing control of their history. Loser Lars! She didn’t try to spell out every detail of this high-level party’s history, or restrict their past to only what she decided to allow - she gave them the broad outlines, and let them embellish it. And that made for a much more alive story than any attempt to create it by herself would have - but I think it takes a lot of courage to let your players have that agency. Most Dungeon Masters (myself included) tend to struggle with being control freaks.

And the plots! Yeah, arc one is built of classic tropes - but she actually uses them, she doesn’t get caught up in subverting everything or laughing at the cliches. And it’s fun! In arc 3, there really isn’t a straight line for the players to follow, either - which makes the game much more interesting and much trickier to run. And her NPCs are fantastic and I will talk about them in the next section.

Above all, though, I think what is really impressive is how Haley balances mechanics, and rules as written, with the narrative and rule of cool - and puts both rules and story in the service of playing a fun game. And the secret to that? She’s the DM, but the DM is a player, and the DM is clearly having fun. Hope Lovejoy mechanically shouldn’t get that spellslot back, but she does, and it’s fun. The changeling merchant in Thymore doesn’t really make some Grand Artistic Narrative better, but wow is it fun. And she never tries to force it one way or the other - the story might be more dramatic if Annie didn’t manage to banish the demon from the vault, but it’s a lot cooler and a lot more fun for the players if Annie gets to be a badass instead - and the rules and the dice say that Annie managed it.

Settings feel like places, NPCs feel like people, and the narrative plot feels like a real villainous plot.

Anyway. I could go on about the various ways in which Whipjack is awesome for quite a while - she’s right, first place in D&D is when your friends laugh and super first place is when they cry - but I’m going to stop here and just. Make another post about it some other time. For now, for the record I hold her opinions about the game in higher esteem than I do several official sourcebooks; that is all.

Characters - Or, Bombyx Mori Is Not an Asshole, And That Matters

Okay, I said I would talk about characters! And I will!

Just a general place to start: the party! All of the first three parties are interesting to me, because they all care about each other. Not even necessarily in a Found Family Trope sort of way, though often that too. But they generally aren’t assholes to each other. The players create characters that actually work together, that are interesting; even when there’s internal divisions like SK-73 v. Sir Mr. Person, they aren’t just unpleasant and antagonistic all the time. Listening to the podcast, we’re “with” these people for a couple hours - and it isn’t unpleasant. That matters a lot. (To take a counter-example: I love Critical Role, but the episode when Vox Machina pranked Scanlan after he died and was resurrected wasn’t fun to listen to, it was just uncomfortable and angering and vaguely cruel).

All of the PCs are amazing, and the players in each arc did a great job. If you disagree with me about that, well, you have the right to be incorrect and I am sorry for your loss. Annie Wintersummer, for one example: tragic and sad and I want to give her a hug, but also Fuck Yeah Wintersummer, and also her familiar Charles the Owl is the cutest and funniest and I love him. And we understand what’s going on with Annie, she isn’t some infinite pool of hidden depths because this arc is 7 episodes and we don’t have time for that, but she also has enough complexity to be interesting. Same with Fey Moss: yeah, a lot of her is a silly pun about fame that carries into how she behaves, but a lot of how she behaves is also down to some good classic half-elven angst about parenthood and wanting to be known and seen and important. (Side note: if your half-elf character doesn’t have angst, well, that’s impressive and also I don’t think I believe you).

There are multiple lesbian cat-people in a 4-person party and they both have requited romantic interests who aren’t each other. This is the future liberals want and I am glad for it.

Sir Mister Person, the human fighter! Thavius, the edge lord! Even when a character is “simple,” they’re interesting, because of how they’re played as people and not action-figures. And that matters a lot.

In the same way: the NPCs. There really aren’t a lot of them! And some of them come from Patreon submissions, so uh good work gang, you’re part of the awesomeness and I’m proud of you! The point being, the NPCs work because enough of them are interesting to matter. It’s not just a servant who opens Count Michael’s door, it’s a character with a name (Oleandra!) and a personality and history. They’re interesting. Penny Lovejoy didn’t need to be interesting, the merchant outside the Laughing Mausoleum didn’t need to be interesting, but they ARE! And Haley and Gus EXCEL at making the NPCs matter, not just to the story but to us as viewers. I agree with Sir Mister Person, actually, I would die for the princesses of the kingdom. I actually care about Gem Lovejoy of all people - that wouldn’t happen in an ordinary campaign! That’s the thing that makes Unprepared Casters spectacular - and, frankly, it’s especially impressive because D&D does not tend to be good at making a lot of interesting compared to a lot of other sorts of stories.

And, just as an exemplar of all this: Bombyx Mori. Immortal, reincarnating(?), and described as the incarnation of the player’s ADHD. I expected to hate Bombyx, because as the mom friend both in and out of my friend-group’s campaigns, the chaos-causer is always exhausting to me. And yeah, Bombyx causes problems on purpose! But! She is not an asshole.

And that’s important. Bombyx goes and sits with the queen and comforts her. Bombyx gives Annie emotional support. Bombyx isn’t just a vehicle to jerk around the DM and other players; Bombyx really is a character we can care about. To compare with another case - in the first couple episodes of The Adventure Zone, the PCs are just dicks. Funny, but dicks. Bombyx holds out an arm “covered in larva” to shake with a count, and robs him of magical items, but she also cares about her friends and other people! She uses a powerful magical gem to save her fertilizer guy from death! Yeah, Bombyx is ridiculous, but she’s not just an asshole the party has to keep around for plot reasons; you can see why her party would keep her around. And one layer of meta up, she’s the perfect example of how to make a chaotic character like that while still being fun for everyone you’re playing with, which is often not the case. And I love her.

The Anti-Mercer Effect - Or, “I think we proved it can be fun, you can have a good time with your friends. And it doesn’t have to be scary, you can just work with what you know”

The Mercer Effect basically constitutes this: Matthew Mercer, Dungeon Master of Critical Role, is incredible (as are all of his players). They’re all professional story-tellers in a way, remember, and so Critical Role treats D&D like a narrative art-form, and it’s inspiring. Seeing that on Critical Role sets impossible standards - and people go into their own home games imagining that their campaigns will be like Critical Role, and the burden of that expectation tends to fall disproportionately on the DM. And the end result, I think, of the Mercer Effect is that we get discouraged or intimidated, because our game isn’t “as good as” theirs. (And I should note - Matt certainly doesn’t want that to be our reaction).

So the Anti-Mercer Effect is two things: it’s D&D treated like a game, and it’s inspiring but not intimidating. And Unprepared Casters manages both of those really freaking well. Because they play it like a game! A UC arc looks just like a good campaign in anyone’s home game. They have the vibes of 20-somethings and college students playing D&D for fun because that’s who they are (as a 20-something college student who plays a lot of D&D, watching it felt like watching my friends play an especially good campaign). They’re trying to tell a good story, sure, and they always do. But first and foremost, they’re trying to have fun, and it shows, and I love the UC cast for it.

And that’s the other half of it: it’s inspiring! It’s approachable; you can see that Haley and Gus put plenty of work into preparing the game but it also doesn’t make you feel like you need hundreds of pages of worldbuilding to run a game. Sometimes a cleric makes Haley cry and she gives them back a spell-slot from their deity! That’s fantastic! It’s just inspiring - listening to this over the summer, when my last campaign had fallen apart under the strain of graduation, is why I decided to plan and run my new one!

That quote from Haley Whipjack that I used as the title for this section? That’s the whole core of this idea, and really, I think, the core of the podcast.

The Mercer Effect is when you go “that’s really cool, I could never do that.” But Unprepared Casters makes you look at D&D and go “wow, that looks really fun. I bet I can do that!” And I love the show for it.

And I bet a lot of you do too.

#unprepared casters #bombyx mori #haley whipjack #long post #this is really rough but I don't have time to keep working on it and it's already a month later than intended

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outoftheblue-if · 3 years

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Hello Vahnya! This game has me very much intrigued already and I've spent like half an hour on this page devouring all the asks lmao I can't choose between Isobel and Clara 😅!

I read the RO ask with the ROs looking through the MC's unlocked phone lol and had an idea: how would they react to finding poetry or something written by the MC for them (like it specifically has their name in it 😋) in the phone? Crushing stage for the increased heart rates please😉.

P.S.: I also very much appreciate that you no longer have the game as gender locked female, as a straight guy there's some really good IF content that's gender locked female, I sometimes feel like I miss out. Tysm for making MC gender selectable. 😇

Hi anon! ✨ Ahh, I'm so happy to hear you like what you've seen so far! I do so love it myself when I find a new WIP to devour lol! And you are so valid for that. I can't choose between any of them, I love them all 🥺 👉🏻👈🏻

I'm really happy with my decision to make MC gender selectable too. I feel so much better knowing my story is inclusive to everyone, and I honestly think it's made the story more interesting as it allows for more intriguing dynamics. It also has the added bonus of being a challenge for me to get out of my comfort zone with my writing, which is great! Win win! 🤎

As for your question/scenario, it was so cute I had to answer this straight away. Let’s say William knows how to read at this point lol

Isobel: Surprise flashes across her face, and she has to double check to make sure she's reading correctly. That it is in fact her name featured in your written words. The words that seem so... sincere. Heartfelt even. As she rereads them again, they send a pleasant jolt of exuberance through her body, and it takes her by surprise. She’s never really felt this kind of emotion before, this crazy rush, this yearning, and she can't seem to shake it off. She’s not even sure she wants to...

Knowing that you took the time to write this, and even kept it secret... She can't help but think that your affections are not only true, but perhaps even... deeply felt? The thought makes hope flutter inside of her, and no matter how much her rational brain tries to swat it down and away, she can't deny the way her heart soars in her chest. It’s surprising and new and terrifying, but despite it all, she feels... happy.

Max: The moment they start reading your heartfelt words, a sharp pain stabs at their heart and they swallow back the tightening of their throat, as they move to put away the phone, not wanting to read about your feelings for someone else. But then, they spot three familiar letters and they blink several times, certain that their eyes are playing tricks on them. They jerk the phone closer to inspect the text, their breath stuttering in their chest when they see the word written clear as day. Max. Their name. It’s their name!

Joy bubbles up in their chest, threatening to overwhelm them, and they allow themselves to relish in it as they read your words over and over again, but this time the words fill them up with a glowing warmth and happiness, the likes of which they never dared to dream they’d be allowed to feel, especially about you. Could it be... that you feel the same? The thought leaves hope fluttering inside their chest, and they swallow back an entirely more pleasant tightening of their throat as emotion washes over them. Gently they put the phone back where they found it, feeling giddy and unable to restrain the grin on their face as they leave the room to go find you.

Clara: The moment she lays eyes on the text in front of her, Clara forces her eyes closed, worrying her lip as she tries to fight the urge to open her eyes and read it. She’s already snooped way too much in your private things, and she can just tell that this is going to be something super private. She really shouldn’t peek, she already feels wretched. Making up her mind, she moves to put the phone away, when her eyes dart down of their own accord and in that short flash she recognises her own name, making her freeze.

Without her permission, her eyes immediately trace along the text to take in your candid words and her heart soars in her chest when she realises that these tender words you’ve written are indeed for her. Blood rushes to her cheeks and she clutches the phone to her chest as the words echo in her head, leaving her giddy, feeling almost drunk with happiness. She gently puts the phone back where she found it, feeling slightly bad knowing that she clearly wasn’t meant to see it, but the buzzing happiness that comes from knowing you feel the same way she does is infinitely stronger.

Richard: Richard’s eyes land on the written words and automatically begin to read, but he quickly clenches his jaw, screwing his eyes shut, as he recognises the tender emotions you’ve detailed in your written words. He feels a stabbing pain in his heart that he tries to shove off, knowing that you’ve written these words for someone else. He doesn’t want to read them and know your feelings for this person, but he can’t stop his eyes from opening once more to finish it. He must be some sort of a masochist. He allows his eyes to carry on, but freeze up as his eyes register his own name. His jaw goes slack, his heart fluttering in his chest. Could it be…?

He rereads the words, intently focused, while his eyes keep flashing down to where his name is. Just to make sure he hasn’t read wrong. But it’s there. Richard. His name. These words were meant… for him? The thought makes his spirits soar, and a warm, glowing sensation spreads through his body as he rereads the word again and again, savouring them. His relief is so great, his joy so profound, that he has to stop himself from doing something rash. He wants to run off to find you, so he can pull you into his arms and jubilantly spin you around, before burying his face in your neck. But that can wait. Know that he knows how you feel, he suddenly feels calm. Like he has all the time in the world to wait for you.

William: William begins to read your words, but his hand immediately clenches around the phone as he realises what exactly he’s reading. Anguish squeezes at his heart, and he tears his eyes away, wanting nothing more than to throw the phone away so he can pretend this doesn’t exist. He doesn’t want to know this. Doesn’t want to know your feelings for someone else. The feelings that will never be aimed towards him. But a part of him needs to know. If nothing else, he needs to know who this person is, needs to know that they’re good enough for you. But who could be good enough for you? He almost skips over parts of the text in his haste to find out, and he has to retrace his steps, eyes widening incredulously as he takes in the unmistakeable seven letters of his own name. William.

He tries to quell the soaring hope in his chest, the sparks of happiness that alights his insides as he allows himself to consider it… Could it be…? Could it truly be possible that you feel the same? That these eloquent, heartfelt words were typed out so diligently with him in mind. Him? What could have possibly drawn you to him? He can scarcely believe it, he wants so desperately for it to be true, it makes it hard to breathe. Surely not. Surely you don’t… But it’s no use. This tiny sliver of hope is enough to make the dam of emotions, the intense and overwhelming yearning for you that he’s tried to bottle up for so long, to come bursting out of the seems, knocking the breath from his lungs. He allows himself to entertain the dream of the life you could have together, of having you by his side, of being happy, and he feels the sudden urge to find you. He needs to know. If there is any chance at all, any possibility whatsoever, that the likes of him could make you happy... well, then he would be a fool not to try.

Thank you so much for your ask and your lovely message! ✨🤎

#i'm sorry if you expected fluff #am i even capable of writing fluff?#why does it always turn angsty #did i not get enough love growing up i–#do not perceive me #i guess they're all idiots in denial except for the ladies huh #le shrug ¯\_(ツ)_/¯#my boys are idiots i guess #ootb #ootb:ros #scenarios #reactions #isobelclaymoore #maxwinthrope #clarahamilton #richardwinfield #williamtaylor

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flo-shifting · 2 years

Text

I think surrender is the final push.

Long story short, I'm highly skeptic of every "fact" about shifting that I hear in the shifting community. Not because it's from shiftok or amino or whatever, but because I realize that most of the beliefs this community has on shifting are just that personal beliefs, opinions.

Like when we expect to shift in just a couple of tries. LIKE WHAT? Who told us this? Why did we believe them?? And don't get me wrong I'm so glad for those that shifted on their first try or even after a few months (also kinda jealous, but I'm working on this lack mentality) how in the hell that became the standard that we measure ourselves with?!

We're thinking that two, three years to learn ON OUR OWN a skill like this is a long time? Guys, let's put shifting into perspective. If you want to learn how to astral project or lucid dream, more experience people will WARN YOU NOT TO EXPECT IT IMMEDIATELY. They tell you straight up: this could easily take you a decade, sit down and get comfortable.

Why do we pressure ourselves so much? I know that we shouldn't overcomplicate shifting, but also let's take all the time we can to actually learning about this. The amount of things I am discovering about not only myself, but about the universe. How energy is transmuted, how we co-create our reality and the amount of actual power our conscience has. IT'S INSANE, and all came through shifting.

Also, patience is so so so important. I know that sometimes accepting that something that you want is not gonna happened right now and there's nothing that you can do to change it feels like giving up or accepting also that you can't shift at all, or it feels like you're out of control. But this desperation is counterproductive, energetically you're blocking your own progress. The more you hold on to what you want, the more you're repelling it simultaneously. The universe it's fuck up like that.

I don't really care anymore how much time it takes me to shift, personally I think it is because I'm not doing methods anymore. I've never been very fond of them, to be honest. I've tried a bunch of them, got symptoms with some, got weird dreams with others. More than anything, they made me anxious, specially after they didn't work. So I stopped doing that, and now I just meditate for a while, set intention and just vibe with the idea of shifting before going to sleep. lol that's literally a method.

What I really don't like about how we approach methods is how they "end" when you shift or, more importantly, when you don't. I've been listening to some podcast on Spotify of Neville Goddard, and it really stuck to me the way this man view the universe and manifesting. I definitely think Neville Goddard teaches you how to shift, but not with methods like we normally do, but with continuous perseverance in the idea of already achieving the goal and focusing on your feelings.

He has this hole thing of being God and creation being finish, and the power of the mind over all but the great importance of our feelings.

Feelings make you shift. I'm so sure of this. They align you with your desired physically. I think it is because when we feel something, so strongly we feel it in our body, like how painful heartbreak feels or how big your chest can get when you feel proud. Feelings are fuel.

So my strategy became just affirming during the day, taking a moment to truly feel like I had already shifted. To explore the feeling and let myself get carried away with it. But quickly transform in me kinda forcing myself to stay in that same "zone", which maybe that's the idea. But I felt stuck, so I'm changing the approach.

Surrender.

I know that I sound like I'm crazy, but I've been getting this messages or "downloads" about letting go, about surrender completely to this process and just accepting that I'm being carry. Y'know. Divine Timing and all that.

Also, if you never read "A la deriva" you should. It's a short story of Horacio Quiroga, a big writer in my country that I read when I was in highscool, but it just got to me how it relates to how I'm feeling right now. So as it seem I'm talking about this now, the story is about a man that lives in the Amazonas, and one day like any other he leaves his house but a snake bites him. He's only option is to get on a little boat and float in the Amazonas to a doctor's house in the area. The point of the story is that as he drifts though the river his mind also stars to drift and, well, he dies.

And to continue with this insane analogy, I think I just need to surrender like the man in the story. Of course not to actually death lol I don't think surrender is the thing that's going to make me shift either. I think I'll end up having like an ego death or something. Like, I have all these limiting beliefs to myself that I'm deconstructing little by little, and this "final surrender" is the last step to a new breakthrough, or a new perspective, a new me.

Yep, a little dramatic, but I'm really excited.

I feel so liberated with this "new" way of shifting. Like I literally am putting it in the hands of fate and my own subconscious, I'll shift when the moment is right, and I'll also know it when I know it? idk I have been stressing over shifting and everything in my life for so long, I don't want to do it anymore, so I'm not lmao

Anyway... I'll be reporting anything worth reporting on this.

chausito.

#shifting blog #shifting #reality shifting #shifting community #shiftblr #desired reality #shifting realities #shifting journal #shifting journey

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atlas-of-the-universe · 3 years

Text

Home (Sequel to Vision’s Powers)

Estimated Reading Time: 18 minutes

Word Count: 4,912

---

There was actually a lot that could have gone better in the situation you were in. You could have moved your feet a little quicker or maybe steadied your breathing so help your balance; but to your dismay, it proved useless. While Bucky swung unimaginably hard fists at the punching bag a few feet away from you, Natasha took you by surprise once again, knocking you off of your feet and onto the mat with a hardy slap. Your back hit the floor and sent a wave of discomfort through you. You were sweaty, thirsty, and worst of all, you were getting frustrated with the work that you were doing. Once again, you and Natasha had decided to stay late to practice your training. The consistent thwacks to the poor punching bad to the left of you echoed in the room. Bucky was barely breaking a sweat.

When your head hit the mat again, you let out a hardy groan and turned your head upwards to face Natasha. She had a light gleam of sweat around her face, but she still looked stunning. The black t-shirt she was wearing clung to her skin and her grey shorts dangled from her hips. Had it been any other situation, you may have been able to admire how she looked and how effortlessly she landed her punches and attacks. Alas, your line of sight was blurred from your eyelashes catching your sweat. It may have been a signal to stop, but your determination was a force to be reckoned with. You knew that Nat was able to see that, so you also knew she was just pushing as hard as you were willing to go. Even so, a break wouldn’t have killed you.

“Always keep your eyes on your opponent,” Nat stated. “Never look away.” Nat offered you her hand to get up and you took it. As she pulled you off the ground, you grimaced at a new pain in your lower back and groaned standing up. She dusted you off and gave you a once over before nodding. “You okay?”

You nodded and reached around to hold the lower portion of your back. “Yeah, I think I probably pulled something. I’ll be fine, but do you think we can take a but of a break for now? I should probably put some ice on this so I can be better by tomorrow.”

Natasha’s eyes furrowed and she gestured to your back. “Do you want me to take a look?” She asked. She looked concerned.

“If you could, I’d appreciate it,” You said and turned your back to her.

Nat gingerly took ahold of the back of your shirt and lifted it up. It was a little nerve-wracking, feeling her small movements, especially facing away from her. Even so, you had been through the same situation a week prior to this with Vision. Perhaps you were getting more comfortable being the newest Avenger, and the team was finally beginning to see you as an equal. With that thought in mind, you made a note of the fact that Natasha had offered to do this herself; you didn’t even really have to ask. That must show some amount of trust if she’s checking you for injuries. She placed a palm on the small of your back and pushed lightly. It didn’t hurt, but it didn’t feel comfortable. Your breathing hitched and you controlled a sigh.

“Does that hurt?” She asked.

You shook your head and chuckled. “It doesn’t feel great.”

She hummed a bit and placed her hand on your side. It was a shocking feeling at first, and if you were honest, reminded you a little too much of the Vision situation that unfolded last week. She pushed her hand into your side and her fingers curled a bit. Of course you didn’t mean to, but you jumped and let out a surprised noise.

“Sorry,” Natasha said. “Just had to see for myself.”

She must have been talking about your pain, right? You smiled and pulled down your shirt, turning to face her. She had a small smirk on her lips, but she looked more curious than devious. “See my pain?” You joked, trying to feign some sort of innocence in hope that she hadn’t figured out your little weakness. “That’s a bit sadistic of you, Nat.”

You heard Bucky chuckle to the left of you. He never missed a beat with his punches, so you decided to stay about fifteen feet out of range of the wildly swinging punching bag. Nat glanced over at him but redirected her attention to you. “Tony mentioned yesterday at the monthly debrief that you and Vision had worked on an experiment together,” She said. “Remind me to tell Tony that it’s time to include you in those meetings. It’s only fair.”

Your heart dropped. You had known that of anyone, Tony would have been the one to tell. He was just that petty. To be honest, the fear of them finding out had slipped your mind until now. You knew that Vision knew (obviously) and so did Tony, but when you asked Tony not to tell, it would have been hard enough to keep that a secret for him. Tony loved to have his fun at the tower, especially if there wasn’t some world-wide-threatening catastrophe in place. However, with a “weakness” of the sort, you felt as though you couldn’t afford to have the rest of the Avengers know about something as childish as that. Even so, you noticed that Natasha didn’t say anything. There was still a chance that, maybe, by the grace of the Gods, just maybe he hadn’t told them. You made sure not to keep that hope to close to you. It was unlikely.

You chuckled nervously. “Yeah, they needed help,” You said. It was inconspicuous enough.

Nat chuckled and wiped off dust from the sides of your arms before giving you a look-over. Besides your hunched stance because of the discomfort in your back, you looked fine. Sweaty, but fine. “Don’t worry about it too much. Everyone has something that can knock them back a few pegs,” Natasha teased. She winked at you and folded her arms. You felt your heart sink once again. Guess Tony told them after all. “Besides, it’s cute. Actually, if we wanted to use it during your training to help you build up a tolerance to it, we could.”

Of course, Nat was all business and little play. Her and you had a very close bond and you knew that she wasn’t someone to push past a friend’s comfort-zone. You appreciated it but chuckled nonetheless and shook your head. “So, I guess everyone knows at this point?” You asked.

“Yeah,” She said chuckling. “Pretty much.”

Shit.

---

After your training with Natasha, you decided to go back to your room to hopefully shower and relax. Your arms and legs were sticky with dried sweat, and you felt completely exhausted. As much as you loved working with Nat, you knew that she tended to push you to your limit. It was necessary, but it still left you feeling drained.

You threw your bag of equipment to the side of your bed and collapsed into your sheets. You planned to stay there for a few minutes before going to shower; if you spent any more time on your feet, you were sure that you’d probably end up falling in the shower. That is certainly the last thing you needed now that your secret was out to the rest of the team. Fucking Tony. You groaned at the thought and rolled over to face the ceiling of your room with your arm draped over your eyes. Okay, so they know your secret. Now what? You stumbled through possible reactions and encounters that could take place because of it. You didn’t think they’d kick you off the team because of it, but it was still embarrassing and, to you, felt a little unbecoming of a superhero. Were you considered a super-hero at this point? Were superheroes ticklish? You chuckled at the thought and tried to imagine the big and mighty Thor rolling on the floor laughing with glee. It was a little ridiculous, but it made you giggle.

About an hour had passed since you had gotten to your room. You finally managed to get up and take a shower and resumed your original position of lying on your bed with your phone in your hand. To be honest, you had started to get hungry and remembered that you hadn’t eaten since lunch. Probably not the best course of action. You glanced at the time and grimaced: 8:27. It wouldn’t be too late to have dinner, but Natasha always advised you against eating after 8. It always made training less bearable. However, since your blood sugar was getting low, you stood up from your bed, your muscles still exhausted. It took just about everything in you to open your door and walk to the kitchen.

The last thing you had expected was to see Vision and Wanda in the kitchen together, Wanda cooking in a large saucepan. From where you stood, it looked like she was making some sort of fried rice, and a ton of it too. You took a step into the room and smiled at Wanda, who in turned smiled at you. The kitchen was brimming with the smell of fresh cooked onions and garlic and plumes of pillowy steam wafted up from the food. “Hey, (Y/N),” Wanda spoke. “Can you do me a quick favor and hand me that bowl of peppers?” You nodded, but before you were able to take it, she made a small noise which sounded surprised. “Actually, never mind,” She said. She had a smile on her face and with her powers, the small bowl of chopped green peppers floated towards her and finally spilled over into the sauce pan. “I forget I can do that sometimes.”

You chuckled. “Anything that I can help with?”

Vision at the opposite end of the island in the middle of the kitchen smiled and waved at you, “Hello (Y/N).”

“Hey, Vis,” You responded and waved.

“Listen, I’m sorry about Mr. Stark. I did my best to dissuade him from telling anyone. I didn’t expect him to say anything at our conference. I hope you can forgive me.”

You appreciated Vision’s apology. To be fair, it wasn’t even Vision’s fault, it was Tony’s. That being said, you weren’t mad at Tony either, nor were you at Vision. “Don’t worry about it,” You said, waving off his apology. “What are you guys doing in here? It’s a bit late to be making dinner.”

“We can ask you the same question!” A voice that you immediately recognized as Steve said from the couches in the corner of the room. You glanced over to see Steve, Natasha, Tony, Sam, Peter, and Thor pressed up against the couches, the light of the television screen lighting up all of their faces with a dim blue light that was ever shifting. “We were waiting on you,” Steve said, resting his arm on the back of the couch.

You smiled but became suddenly aware of your presence in the room compared to all of them. You felt meek and a bit shy suddenly. You opted to take a stool at the kitchen island rather than try to find a seat for yourself in the middle of everyone. “I’m surprised that Bucky isn’t here. Is he okay?” You asked, looking to Natasha for an answer. Just an hour ago or so, he had been with you both in the training room, knocking the hell out of those poor punching bags. “Should I go try to find him?”

“Don’t worry about it,” A voice said from behind you while a hand placed itself on your head, messing your hair around. You spun on the stool to see Bucky’s smiling face. “Glad to know that someone missed me,” He said. You felt good for a bit, knowing that you made him feel good. His black leather jacket stretched around his body and creaked with all of his movements. Maybe he had gone out for a drive or to go to the bar; it had become his main place to be since finding his own apartment. He put his hand down and looked at the rest of the group.

You turned away from Bucky to get a look at everyone else. They were all in casual clothing, a sight you normally would not have ever gotten to see. Under usual circumstances, everyone would be dressed in their “super-hero” attire, consisting of flashy colors, hard metal shields and weapons, and especially form fitted so everything went where it needed to and they wouldn’t have to worry about anything but the fighting. Seeing everyone in pajamas, sweats, and t-shirts certainly was not the first thing you expected to see. Even so, it felt homely and welcoming to see everyone relaxed. There were several bright red (courtesy of Tony, of course) leather couches and a dark wood table set in front of the three seater, and a few recliners in the same color sat in a large “U” shape around the flat screen television. You recalled the first day you arrived at the facility:

You had arrived hand in hand with Natasha who had been giving you a guide around the tower. Your past was not something that you were ready to discuss with anyone, all they had known is that you were found during a series of raids in Russia. Natasha had been assigned to work undercover for a terrorist organization. You were grateful, but to be honest, you weren’t necessarily ready to deal with your past either. Your raggedy clothes had been stripped away and replaced with a clean and ironed out t-shirt that Steve had offered you. You were in no position to say no, especially considering that your clothes were just about ready to fall off. After the tour and getting your first shower in weeks, Natasha had lead you to the room you were in now: the living room. You both sat there for hours, watching Disney movies and bad rom-coms while eating take-out. Natasha had been the first one there for you, and even helped you begin your training. She was the person you trusted the most, and every ounce of you was grateful.

Currently, Natasha was sat on the left side of the couch furthest from the television, Steve on the right side. On the other couch furthest to the back wall, Peter sat on the ottoman in front of Tony and Sam, while Thor sat comfortable in his own recliner. There were also three more recliners available, but you made a point in your head to save those for Bucky, Vision, and Wanda. But…where would you sit? I mean, you thought, I don’t mind sitting on the floor. The floor was completely clean, of course. It wouldn’t make for that much of an issue. However, scanning over the room again, you noticed a wide gap between Steve and Natasha. Natasha glanced at you and smiled, patting the open space with her hand. She gestured to come over to her with her head, and you gladly did so, making sure to be quiet and polite about sitting down. Honestly, it didn’t seem like anyone was paying much attention to the movie, whatever it was. Everyone was either chatting or on their phone. Maybe they had done this…for you? You had never seen them gather like this, and Steve did mention that they had been waiting on you. Even with that thought in mind, you pushed it off and stared straight at the television. There was a subtle fear in you over making eye contact with the others, so you kept your gaze away from the others faces.

Peter was too lost in a one-sided conversation with Thor to notice your presence in the room. You watched how his hands flailed when he was excitedly speaking and how he barely ever broke eye contact except to think. It was admirable, especially for someone his age in comparison to everyone around you. He seemed to be speaking about this new experiment that Vision, Tony and him had been working on, but something about it seemed a little too familiar. Something about his words made your ears perk up, until…

“Yeah!” Peter exclaimed, nodding eagerly. “I thought it would have been painful, it just tickled.”

You froze and looked at Tony, who was smirking. He shifted his gaze to you and bumped his eyebrows. In reaction, you immediately cast your gaze down to your knees and felt your face heat. You guessed that it had been possible that Tony did need more “test-subjects” rather than just yourself…but did he need to be so obvious about it?

“Oh, uh, that reminds me,” Tony said. Peter instantly hushed. “(Y/N), you worked on the experiment with us. Did you enjoy it?”

The fact that no one paid any attention to Peter’s indirect admission into being ticklish made you a little bit more comfortable, but it was still embarrassing. Your eyes darted to everyone in the room as they looked at you with soft smiles. You nodded and let out a nervous laugh. “Yeah,” you said. “It really wasn’t painful. Ah, pretty much just what Peter said.”

“Oh?” Tony said, jerking his head up. “Did it feel weird or anything?” Tony shook his head with each word he spoke with pursed lips.

You knew exactly what he was trying to do. You went through the list of scenarios that were in your head, mostly possible outcomes of different responses, but some were images of you being scorned, excluded, or mocked because of this little weakness of yours. You cleared your throat and nodded with a nervous laugh. “Yeah, same as Peter, really,” you said. Tony looked at your to further elaborate on your answer. “Just tickled.”

Next to Tony, Sam let out a rather loud groan and threw his head back onto the back of the couch. A pit immediately grew in your stomach; these were the kinds of reactions that you had been hoping to avoid. “Tony, leave the kid alone. She doesn’t need you being a creep on top of everything else.”

Tony put his hand to his chest in mock surprise. “Me?” He asked overzealously. “Come on, this place could use a little excitement.”

“She’s had enough excitement to last her a lifetime,” Natasha chimed in from next to you. You smiled at her, but she stared directly at Tony. “Plus, her skills in combat are getting impressive. I imagine she’d be able to take you on.”

Once again, the pit in your stomach grew and your heart rate spiked. There was no rhyme or reason why you would want to take on any one of these people in a fight. Natasha was the only person you had sparred with in the past few days, and thus, the only person you felt comfortable even beating in a fight. Your mouth spoke before your head was able to catch up, simply because of the panic. “No, no,” You said, your hands up in defense. “I don’t think I-”

“Sure you can!” Thor chimed in with a grin from his recliner (that he looked way too large for). “We’ve trained and battled warriors even smaller than you across the nine realms. Some of them put up a very good fight.” It was supposed to be a compliment, so you smiled at him in thanks.

“What do you think, (Y/N)?” Steve asked. You looked over to Bucky and watched his eyes dart between you, Steve, and Natasha. It was normal for Bucky, Steve, Nat and you to have lengthy conversations in the training room but truth be told, you had never participated in a larger group discussion with them. The feeling in the room felt devious, but you kept your cool and did you best to steel your face the way that Natasha had taught you. “Think you’d be able to take us in a fight?”

You smiled and gathered up the courage to be apart of the conversation, rather than the shy feelings that you displayed. “I think I’d rather fight next to you guys than against you.”

“Good answer,” Bucky said with a smile and patted your shoulder.

“Kiss ass,” Tony remarked. You chuckled but decided to ultimately ignore it.

Once the energy of the room had died down, you returned your gaze to see exactly what movie had been put on for you. Maybe if you had had time in the last few years to sit down and watch television, even just the commercials, you would have had an idea of what it could be. A large gymnasium filled to the brim with teenage girls was on screen, the camera focusing on a particular one who seemed nervous to be there. There wasn’t much point in asking what you were watching; no one was really paying much attention anyways. Peter went back to excitedly explaining his latest science project and how a test that he had coupling the project was coming up in a few days. He was confident, but a little on edge. He mentioned how studying would probably help him---

Your thoughts were cut off by a quick jab to both of your ribs, and your body flung backwards into the couch to guard yourself. A little giggle escaped your lips and your elbows flew to your sides. You looked behind you to see Bucky with a rather devious smirk as he leaned onto the headrest of the couch. You didn’t even notice him stand up, let alone get behind you.

“Had to test the waters,” he said, his smile not leaving his face. “Oops.”

“Lot worse than we thought, huh?” Steve said and smiled at you. You looked up at Bucky who was hovering directly over your face, barely even a foot away. Your stomach fluttered with nerves and you turned away to make sure he wouldn’t be able to see the blush on your cheeks. Before you could utter out a response to this not-so-sudden attack, you felt fingers on your side give a light squeeze. You squeaked, pushed further into the couch, and fell into a short burst of giggling before opening your eyes to see Steve’s hand inches from your torso. “Guess so!” He exclaimed, laughing.

There wasn’t really much time to be able to compose yourself between Bucky’s little attach and Steve’s. Soft giggles already flowed from your lips and your eyebrows furrowed up into a worried look. Your body smushed itself into the couch as far as you could possibly go and pinned your arms to your sides to prevent anymore attacks. With your hands in front of you, you attempted to steady your giggles, however, your words were interlaced with the subtle shake of mirth. “Wait, wait, wait, this isn’t a great idea—”

Peter turned to face you from his ottoman and laughed, giving your knee a squeeze which didn’t do anything to help your cause. If anything, it just made you jolt and your giggles get louder. He smiled at you with raised eyebrows. “I’m just glad I’m not on the receiving end of this,” He stated.

“Don’t get your hopes up, boy genius,” Tony said, standing up from his seat. “Just because we have a new victim doesn’t mean you don’t exist anymore.”

Peters face flushed but he chuckled. “Trust me,” he said. “I’m grateful.”

Between your nerves from having three people tickle you, it took you a second to register what Peter had just conversed about. Had something like this happened before? To be fair, it was easier to imagine Peter getting tickle-attacked here than anyone else. After all, he was still a bit childish. Granted, so were you so… that didn’t necessarily leave you in a good spot.

It was interesting though; when you had first heard of the Avengers, you saw them on television when you were younger. Watching them fight side by side against the Chitauri was inspiring, but this was years later. Of course, you never would have guessed that you would have been part of the team yourself. Let alone, you never would have guessed that the Avengers were actually quite playful.

The confusion slipped your mind as Bucky fluttered his fingers on the side of your neck, which automatically renewed your giggles. You scrunched up your shoulders and grabbed at his wrists, which ultimately did nothing. It was also a very strange sort of tickle, considering that one hand, or arm rather, was completely made of metal. He had cold (literally) and calculated movements, and his fingers fluttered up to the back of your ears. You squealed and held your hands up to your ears in a less than desperate attempt to stop the attack. Had it been another situation, a noise coming like that from an Avenger would have been embarrassing, but your mind was too busy focusing on the feeling.

“Bucky!” You shouted, dissolving further into your laughter, and sinking further in the couch.

Not slow enough for your mind to register what was happening, a new squeezing tickle sparked to life on your left side and you hunched over. You let out a small involuntary scream and hunched your body towards the left. You realized that Steve had taken it upon himself to help Bucky out, and really, you shouldn’t be surprised. The zapping sort of feeling in your sides and the light fluttering on your neck were almost too much to bear, and your laughter hitched. You debated on taking your hands away from your ears and neck, but that would only help Bucky. However, if you didn’t, then that would just give Steve more of an opening. Instead, your body took control, and slid down even further until your head was placed a few inches on Steve’s lap. You curled in on yourself as Steve moved his hand to your right side, which was now exposed. Bucky’s fingers switched to what he could get at in your position, which happened to be your ribs. You rolled onto your back in a feeble attempt to stop their fingers, but it only made them switch to your stomach. Once again, your laughter hitched. Deep belly laughs mixed with squeals echoed over the sound of the television. There were few thoughts bouncing around your head as you were tickled to pieces. Don’t kick Nat. Can everyone hear the movie over me? PLEASE don’t kick Nat. How long have they been going? How long are they planning this? Was anyone paying attention anymore? Guard yourself. If this was an enemy, you’d be screwed. Oh god, please don’t let Natasha use this in training. This is embarrassing. Who’s that laughing? Why is this…kind of fun?

“Guys, PLEHEHEASE!” You begged. You could hear a few scattered chuckles over your own laughter, but it was hard to focus on who they were coming from.

“Alright, alright,” Steve said, stopping his movements and resting his palm on your forehead. Bucky stopped as well. “I think she’s had enough for one day.”

You were grateful for the air that flooded its way into your lungs. You were panting, but scattered giggles escaped from your lips. To be honest, you didn’t care much about the fact that your head was resting on one of the founding members of the Avengers. If anything, he was the one who decided to tickle you, so he had to deal with the consequences that came with it. When you opened your eyes, the team around you were in giggle fits themselves. Bucky was still peering over at you from behind the couch, his arms hoisting him up on the back rest. He had a wide smile on his face. Scattered conversations here and there let you know that most of the attention was off of you at this point, which you were kind of grateful for. You pushed yourself off of Steve’s lap and playfully pushed Bucky’s head out of the way so you could sit up. He laughed and ruffled your hair, before finding his own recliner and sitting down. Steve let out a laugh and looked you up and down.

“You look like you just got out of training,” he said.

Grateful for the playfulness of his tone, you laughed at what he said. “I feel like it too.”

Next to you, Natasha poked you in the ribs. Your defenses automatically went up again before she placed her hand on your shoulder. It was her way of telling you that you could relax now. At least, that’s what she did during training. “Welcome to the real Avengers.”

“Real?” Sam said from his seat. “If I remember correctly, we’ve saved the world too many times to count. That’s real.”

“Lighten up, hotshot,” Tony spoke. “We can still be the Avengers without having a stick in our ass. Maybe you need the America dream team over there to teach you how to do that too.”

“You touch me and I’ll kill you,” Sam said with a smile on his face.

Maybe you were wrong. Maybe this place was a lot more familial than you thought. And maybe, just maybe, you could find this place becoming a permanent home for you.

#Avengers x reader #Ticklish!Reader #tickle fic #avengers tickle fic #natasha romanoff #steve rogers #bucky barnes #vision #sam wilson #tony stark #wanda maximoff

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drabbles-mc · 3 years

Text

All The Stops

Neron ‘Creeper’ Vargas x F!Reader

Request by Anon: Could i request a Creeper fic? Like you're sick and he is taking care of you. Neti pot and secret family soup recipes and all lol.

Warnings: language, Creeper being Extra but we love him for it

Word Count: 1.7k

A/N: I love Creeper so much. I love writing for the sappy sweet side of him, too. Hope y’all enjoy! xo

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You’d told him not to worry, to stay away so you didn’t end up getting him sick too. Whatever it was that you had left you feeling like you got hit by a semi. Your whole body ached, and you could hardly breathe out of your nose. What had started off as a cold you thought you could just ignore and brush off, very quickly turned you into a zombie.

You were caught between trying to down-play it so he wouldn’t worry, and over-selling it so he would leave you alone and not end up getting sick himself. You should have known better, though. He was far too clingy and hell-bent on taking care of you to stay away. It was sweet, and you appreciated it, but you didn’t want both of you to end up feeling like death warmed over.

When you heard the knock at the door, you knew exactly who it was. You let out a long sigh as you forced yourself up off the couch. You folded your arms over your chest as you shuffled to your front door. When you opened the door, you came face-to-face with Creeper. His eyes were full of concern as he stood on your front steps, large cardboard box in his arms.

“You didn’t tell me you were this sick,” he said as he walked inside.

You shut the door behind him as you replied, “Because I knew you’d do…all of whatever this is.”

He made his way to your kitchen, setting the box down on your counter. Turning back around to face you, he took a moment to really look at you. His lips turned down into a frown as he looked at you bundled up in his sweatshirt with the hood flipped up, toes curling against the cold floor. He stepped toward you, gently resting his hand against your forehead.

“You should’ve called,” he pulled you into a hug.

As much as you didn’t want to be touched, you had to admit that it was nice to feel his strong arms wrapped tight around you. you managed a small smile as you leaned into his chest, “Didn’t have to, you still showed up,” you gestured towards the box on the counter, “What’s all that?”

He let go of you to walk back over to everything that he had brought in, “Your cure.”

You chuckled as you walked and sat across the counter from him. You rested your chin in your hands as you watched him unpack everything that he’d brought over. His focus was evident on his face as he set everything out—brows furrowing in concentration.

“You really don’t have to do all of this, Neron,” you told him with a slight shake of your head.

“Of course I do,” he looked almost offended, “You’re sick. I can’t just let you suffer alone.”

You smiled, not wanting to argue the point any further. Clearly, there would be no changing his mind. You amused yourself by looking over all the different spices that he had with him. While you did that, he started to root around your kitchen and pull some things together.

“Anything I can do?” you asked.

“Go lay down and rest,” he walked around to your side of the counter, “I’ll carry you to bed.”

You laughed, which in turn made you cough, “Stop, Neron, I can walk myself to bed.”

He shook his head as he scooped you up in his arm, “I got you, baby.”

You didn’t have the strength to fight him on it, so you let yourself get whisked away. It was an incredibly short walk to your room but you still let yourself lean into him.

He laid you down on the bed and pulled the blanket up over you. There was a small smile on his face as he caressed your cheek, gently pushing a stray lock of hair out of your face, “Try and get some sleep. It’ll be a while until everything is ready anyway,” he kissed the top of your head.

“Everything? What’s everything?” you smiled up at him.

“Don’t worry, I got it. Get some rest. I love you.”

Before you could ask any more questions, he turned and made his way towards the bedroom door. You listened intently for a few minutes to try and figure out what he was doing, but it didn’t take long for the comfort and warmth of the blankets to put you to the sleep.

You had no idea how long you had been asleep for, but when you woke up you heard the muffled sound of music coming from the far end of the house. A tiny groan slipped past your lips as you sat upright and forced your body to stretch. You swung your legs off the bed and stood up, stretching once more before opening the bedroom door and heading towards the kitchen.

The music got louder as you got closer to the kitchen. And, for the first time in a few days, you would actually smell what was being cooked. You had no idea what he was making, but it smelled great so you weren’t worried. He didn’t hear the quiet pattering of your feet over his music, so you were able to sneak in and find your seat at the counter without him noticing you. You watched him bobbing his head and mumbling along with the lyrics of the song that was on. Despite your exhaustion you smiled. He seemed so at-home.

“How’s it comin’?” you asked.

He spun around, ladle in his hand raised and ready to strike. When he saw that it was you, he lowered his hand with a sigh. He shook his head, “Can’t sneak up on me like that, Mama.”

“Or what?” you chuckled, “You gonna accidentally beat me up with a soup ladle?”

He wagged it at you accusingly, “Bourne almost killed someone with a rolled-up newspaper.”

You fought back a cough as you laughed, “You comparing yourself to Jason Bourne now?” you shook your head, “Anyway, how’s all this going?” you nodded towards the stove.

He let the topic drop as he turned back to all of his things on the stove, “Good. Almost done.”

“What is it?” you got up and crept over to get a look.

He watched you with a smile as you peeked into the pot on the stove, “Vargas Family recipe. Mom used to make this all the time when we would get sick. Fixed our whole shit, swear to god.”

You laughed, “Sounds exactly like what I need,” you turned back around to face him, “Never knew you were so good in the kitchen.”

He smiled as he pulled you into a gentle hug, “You never gave me a chance. Had to be knockin’ on death’s door in order to get you to rest.”

You chuckled, leaning into his touch, “That’s true.”

Sitting back on the other side of the counter, you rested your chin in your hands as you watched him finish up everything that he was preparing. There was something relaxing about watching him shuffle busily around your kitchen. He was completely in his own zone.

It wasn’t too long before he was turning to you with a bowl of soup in each hand. There was a proud smile on his face as he nodded towards the living room. He waited for you to get comfortably situated on the couch before handing you your bowl.

For a while, the only noise in the house came from the television. Each of you ate in comfortable silence. You were savoring it—this was the first thing you were able to taste in almost a week. And Creeper was too busy watching you and making sure you were alright and enjoying it to say anything. You could feel his eyes on you, but you didn’t care. A week of hardly forcing yourself to eat was all catching up to you.

Once your bowls were empty and discarded on the coffee table, he pulled you so that you were laying with your head in his lap. He gently rubbed your shoulder as you settled against him.

“There’s tea for you, too, when you’re ready,” he let you know.

You hummed in response, feeling the most comfortable you had in a while, “Thank you.”

He looked down at you, brows furrowing, “You still sound stuffy.”

You chuckled, “I’m still sick, Neron. Your soup was good but I don’t think it’s magical.

“I brought my neti pot,” he nodded towards the box he’d brought with him, “We can jus hook you up,” he demonstrated with his hand how it worked, “and clear you out. Tellin’ you, baby, you’ll be good as new.”

You shook your head, sniffling as you did, “Hard pass, Neron.”

“Why?”

“Because,” you tried not to laugh, “that’s gross.”

“I clean it after I use it!”

“I’m sure you do!” you couldn’t hold back your laugh, “Still gross.”

“Will you at least drink the tea?”

You smiled as you sat upright so he could get up, “Yes, baby, I’ll drink the tea.”

You smiled as you watched him shuffle back over to the kitchen and grab a mug for you. He was so careful pouring it and bringing it back over to you. You smiled as you cupped it in your hands. He sat back down next to you, gently rubbing his hand up and down your back. Even though you were still sick, you felt like a new person after a decent nap and a good meal. His touch was more than welcome.

“Thank you,” you rested one hand on his knee, “I really appreciate all of this.”

He shook his head, “This ain’t nothin’. If I had more time to prepare I would’ve pulled out all the stops.”

You chuckled, sipping on your tea, “This was more than enough. Thank you, seriously.”

“I love you. I got you—whatever you need,” he leaned over and kissed your temple.

“I love you too,” you leaned against his side and pulled your feet up onto the couch, settling into the comfort of him being there to take care of you when you needed it.

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