#we r long distance so it was very special | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

builtbybrokenbells · 7 months

Text

Catch-22 | ii

Nothing good ever happens after 2am.

Masterlist

Pairing: Sam Kiszka x f!reader

Word Count: 9k

Warnings: angst, old heartbreak and some new heartbreak, mentions of hookups, crying, breakups, arguing, high school talk, mentions of insecurities, swearing, drinking, some fluff, sorry if i miss any!

hi everyone, was going to wait to post this later tonight but i am miserably tired and will probably go right to bed after work lol, so here you go. lots of backstory in this one! like I said, i plan on this story being a bit of a slowburn so please have some patience with me while we set the scene. i hope you’re liking this so far because i know i am :) as always, enjoy, be kind, and don’t mind any grammar mistakes 🫶🏻 (lightly edited my apologies)

The sun was high in the sky, casting a golden glow over the earth while green grass was tickling your feet as you tumbled through it. Your parents had given up on the battle of putting your shoes on, because you kicked them off every time they thought they had won. They were sat on a porch, looking out at you every now and again to check in, but we’re mostly caught up in chatter with the other set of parents sitting beside them. Life was simple; all you had to care about was toys and sleep, and maybe scoring well on a spelling test every now and again. In truth, as a six year old, there was no need to worry about anything more than that. Your whole life revolved around Disney movies and chocolate milk, shared most often with your best friend in the entire world.

Sam Kiszka was undoubtedly that person, from the very day you were born up until long after you moved away. Long before you were ever a thought in your parents heads, they had been good friends with Sam’s parents. Your older sister had the same relationship with Sam’s older twin brothers, and you had always been destined for the same fate. Between barbecues and beach days, school sports and sleepovers, your lives had been inevitably intertwined with the Kiszka’s since your very first day on earth. You never thought to complain, mostly because you never knew the difference. They were like an extension of your own family, and in truth, you saw them more often than you saw your actual aunts and uncles.

“Y/n!” Sam exclaimed, catching your attention. Your head turned in his direction, now uncaring for the doll clasped between your hands. A smile was on your lips, excited that he wanted your attention, but it was nothing new. You loved having his attention, and you loved when he was asking for yours. He was always your biggest priority, even back when you were that young. He was running towards you, something held tightly in his hands that you couldn’t see very well from the distance. You took off in a run, forever happy to meet him halfway. When you were within arms reach, he extended his hand out to you, showcasing what he was holding with pride.

“For me?” You asked, struggling with the pronunciation of the ‘r’ at the end of your word. The touch of the speech impediment was blatantly obvious, but he loved you too much to care about it.

“Yeah.” He nodded with a smile on his lips, too. It was nothing special, but it was incredibly important to you, just because it had come from him. He placed the cluster of dandelions he had picked for you in your hand, enthusiastic about his work.

“Thank you, Sammy.” You giggled, bringing them closer to your face to get a closer look.

“You’re welcome.” He beamed. “They’re pretty, just like you.” The childhood innocence was astounding; just two babies speaking from their heart, thrilled by each others company and hoping that your parents would never make you go home. You sat on the ground, crossing your legs and placing the flowers beside you. He wasted no time, sitting down with you, always wanting to do the same thing that you were doing. “We’re gonna be best friends forever, you know.”

“I hope so.” You agreed, amused easily by picking strands of grass from the ground.

“And when we grow up, we’ll get married, just like my parents, ‘cause that’s what best friends do.” He continued, falling back on the ground and looking up to the sky. You laid down next to him, gazing longingly at the clouds. At that age, everything seemed so much more wondrous, so much more beautiful. Colours were brighter, and the world was not yet tainted by the darkness of adulthood. Happiness was the most you knew, diminished only occasionally with sadness that stemmed from a broken toy or a scraped knee. The biggest struggle back then was when your mother made something you disliked for dinner and that bedtime was at eight. It was so much simpler, so much better. The kids in your class were not old enough to be mean, and even if they were, it never mattered because Sam was always by your side.

“M-married?” You struggled with the word, but once again, he didn’t care. He was too busy planning a life full of toy trucks and Barbie dolls, knowing that he loved you enough then to make space for your toys in his life, too, even if he didn’t necessarily like them.

“Yeah,” he said, looking over to you “we wouldn’t have to worry about our parents making us go home. We could stay up all night and play games together forever.” He theorized. Your six-year old brain thought it was the best idea in the whole world, even at that age knowing that a lifetime with Sam was a dream come true. Even if you didn’t fully know what it meant, you couldn’t think of any downsides of his plan.

“That would be awesome.” You giggled, closing your eyes.

“It would be the best.” He corrected, reaching across the grass and slipping his hand into your own.

You woke with a start, heart pounding in your chest and your forehead glistening with sweat. Your stomach was churning with unease, haunted by the innocent memories of your childhood. You sat up, head still spinning with intoxication as you looked around your room. Moonlight was pouring in the window, letting you know that it was nowhere near time for you to wake up. You found your phone tangled in the blankets, pulling it out to check the time. “Four in the morning?” You grumbled, feeling wide awake after your brain’s incessant recollection of your younger years. You did your best to stand, feeling yourself in a constant state of dizziness. You figured if you got some water into you, you could speed up your body’s process in returning to sobriety.

You creeped into the hallway, careful not to disturb any of your sleeping family members. You made it to the kitchen, feeling yourself relax as you grabbed a bottle of water from the fridge. You gulped as much of it down as you could, ignoring the nausea that came along with it. Before finishing the bottle, you grabbed some Advil and swallowed those down, too. Instead of returning to your bedroom, you took a seat at the kitchen table to let the water settle in your stomach. You felt a great deal better already, your eyes more focused and your heart resuming its normal rhythm, but your mind was still racing with memories similar to the one in your dream. You reached out to the fruit bowl sitting on the table, grabbing an apple in hopes that some good nutrients might aid your shaking hands and weak muscles. As you bit into it, you knew that the ailments were not because of a nasty hangover from alcohol; they were solely due to your body’s withdrawal from Sam.

He was the worst addiction you ever had, his effect on you similar to a fever that you just couldn’t kick. You were sweaty, shaky and delirious as you tried to bring your temperature down, but it only ever seemed to spike higher. You went through bouts of missing Sam, feeling the sickness creep in the longer you thought about him, but being face to face with him always seemed to debilitate you. Just when you thought you could rid yourself of the disease for good, he showed up out of nowhere, killing off any healthy cells and engulfing them with his existence. All of your progress gone in an instant, and he didn’t even care to see how badly he was hurting you. Sam was the only thing your body knew, and it craved him so desperately that it was excruciating to go without him, but it was so toxic that as soon as you felt his presence again, you thought you might die from the illness.

As much as you wished he would disappear, you knew that even after all this time, he was the beacon of light in your darkened universe. The only thing that would guide you home when you lost your way, yet also the very thing that you wished to run away from. Back then, he made home feel more like home, but now that he was gone, the lack of his presence made the loneliness scream even louder. The love never disappeared, but it seemed as though resentment grew around it, locking it up and throwing away the key. Even while knowing you held him in such contempt, you knew it was not the end of your story. It rarely ever was, and you believed that after years of manifesting that you would be intertwined forever, you cemented it so well that there was no escape from it, now.

It was the way you and Sam had always worked; you would be inseparable to the point where you started to believe that it truly was forever, and then something would cause a drift. It was either a huge blowout, or a silent goodbye. Neither were favourable because you both wanted to make it work so badly. You would stay away for a while, swear that it was the end and you would never double back on your word, then you would cross paths in a twisted way of fate, inevitably landing right back at the beginning. There was no better way to describe it than your conversation just a few hours before; one of you displeased with seeing the other, yet both of you knowing it was bound to happen despite your efforts at avoidance. Sooner or later, you and Sam always ended up back in each others arms, and eventually, you would be hurt again from the very thing you previously wished to have just once more.

The issue did not lie within a lack of love; the two of you loved each other beyond any measure of human comprehension, but you had absolutely no idea how to love each other properly. Destined to love and programmed to hurt. It was an exhausting process, and even after a lifetime of learning it so well, you hadn’t yet managed to discover the secret to breaking it.

Loving Sam would be the death of you, but the thought of anything at his hand was so comforting that you forgot about the fear of dying itself.

“I think I love you, Rapunzel.” The nickname was endearing, yet already overused in the short time since he had come up with it. He thought he was a genius when he rattled it off for the first time, the inspiration striking him while he sat below your window waiting for you to open it and allow him inside. Living just down the street from you made it so much easier to sneak out and visit, and it had become almost a nightly routine.

“I love you too, Sammy.” You laughed, keeping your voice quiet so your parents wouldn’t hear you. The last think you wanted was to get caught. You could deal with the consequences for yourself, but you’d be miserable if they stopped allowing Sam over.

He was your anchor in your house full of constant chaos; your oldest sister was constantly terrorizing you for taking too long in the bathroom (or for anything else she could think to be angry about), your youngest sister was still in elementary school and was always amidst temper tantrum, and your parents had become experts at fighting without saying a word. Peace and quiet was a foreign concept, and the nighttime routine that you and Sam found yourselves in was the best part of your day. He would sneak over just after dark when his parents believed him to be tucked into his room getting ready for bed. He’d throw a pebble at your window to let you know he was there, and you’d let him inside. You’d spend the rest of the evening together laying in bed, talking about your fears and your hopes and dreams, then he would begrudgingly make his way back home after a prolonged goodbye. It was predictable, but it was comforting, and it was the only constant in your life when everything else seemed so chaotic.

Eighth grade had taken an incredible toll on you. With puberty, your family’s new found tension, and your struggle with not fitting in with the rest of the girls was wearing you down, yet Sam still seemed to look at you the exact same as he always did; with love in his eyes and a smile on his face. Nothing in the world could change it, and he would still love you the same no matter what you looked like, because in his eyes, you were the most beautiful girl in the world. You looked over at him, focused enough to notice that his adolescence was slowly fleeing him. His jawline was sharper and every now again his voice would crack. He sounded different and looked different, but he was the same as he always was. It seemed like time could not even begin to touch his character, nor the bond you had formed, and you were incredibly grateful for it.

“No,” he shook his head, looking down to meet your face “in love, y/n.” His voice was quiet, but it was no longer because of the fear of being caught. He was fearful of rejection and of ruining what you two had worked so hard at creating. You couldn’t explain the feeling that washed over you; it was not anxiety or any type of nervousness, nor excitement. It was comfortability, like what he said to you was less of a shock and more of a rite of passage.

“Yeah, me too.” You whispered. It did not matter that neither of you really knew what being in love meant, because you loved each other in every way you knew how, and that was the only thing that held any importance. Thirteen year olds had no true sense of reality or anything pertaining to growing up, but you knew that you wanted to be with each other and love each other in every way possible. He didn’t care about your bulky glasses or your weight, or any other differences you had from the other girls in your grade. He cared about you, and he cared so much that no other thirteen year old boy could even begin to understand it.

“Really?” He couldn’t hide the relief in his voice, and you thought it was quite endearing.

“Yeah.” You repeated, nodding your head.

“Oh, cool.” He sighed, relaxing back into the mattress. His head was rested atop a pillow that constantly smelled of his shampoo, and it was the same one you always held closest to you while you slept. Sam was your entire world, and always had been. The proclamation of love changed nothing except for giving you another way to express the way you felt for each other. “So, what now?” He asked. You looked down at your hands, fingers already intertwined with each others. You already had your head resting on his arm, leaning against him to steal the warmth straight from his body. “Does it change anything?”

“No,” you shook your head. “I think this is it.”

The memory was gut wrenching, shooting daggers straight into your heart. You weren’t sure if it was your drunken stupor or your broken heart, but you felt another round of tears begging to be shed. You craved so badly to be those innocent kids again, to go back and do it right without breaking each others hearts, but it was impossible. You craved to love Sam without any pain, but you knew that the pain shared between you both was too large to ever let go of. You were afraid that love, especially when it came to Sam, was nothing but violence. Even if the good moments were fantastic, you could not hold on to hope for a lifetime full of hurt.

The creep of footsteps could be heard down the hallway, but you were too drunk to clean yourself up before you were thrown into confrontation. Whoever dared to impose could suffer the consequences of your sadness. When the body presented itself at the other end of the kitchen table, you looked up to meet the concerned eyes of your youngest sister. “Hey, bug.” You quickly wiped away your tears. “What are you doing awake?”

Correction: you were willing to impose your sadness on anyone as long as it wasn’t her.

“You were upset when you came home tonight,” she said, referring to the state you were in after the bar. “I was worried, I couldn’t sleep.”

“You don’t have to worry, Ellie.” You assured her, sniffling back another sob. Your relationship with her was strange. When she was born, you hated her so badly that you asked your parents to bring her back to the hospital. When she started to get a little older and you realized that she was there for good, you began to warm up to her. By the time she was in school, your parents were working a lot and you took care of her more often than not. Your oldest sister, Brooke, helped as much as she could until she went off to college, but she was a lot busier with her personal life than you were, so you were most often the babysitter. You watched her grow up as you did, too, and she was your whole world.

“I do, though.” She replied, dismissing your own dismissal. “You cried yourself to sleep, and now you don’t want to be in your bed. The only time you don’t like sleeping in your bed is when Sam’s done something wrong. I know it reminds you of him.” For a fifteen year old, she was incredibly observant. “I thought you guys stopped talking?”

“We did, and we aren’t going to start again. Just ran into him at the bar. I’ll be okay, though. I’m always okay.” You assured her, closing your eyes to stop any more tears from falling.

“You always take care of me, y/n. Let me take care of you for once.” She said, unwilling to give up. Without permission, she took a seat next to you at the table after grabbing you another bottle of water. “Just because it’s happened a long time ago doesn’t mean it you have to be over it.”

“He’s like the plague.” You sighed, soothing your irritated eyes with the cold skin on the back of your hands. “He just… takes over, and I don’t know how to get rid of him. I try to forget about him, and then something else makes me fall in love all over again.”

“He was your whole world.” She shrugged, wishing there was some magic answer to ease all of the hurt you were feeling. “I mean… I remember Sam being here all of the time. He was around just as much as you were. You were best friends. He was your first love and your first heartbreak. It only makes sense for it to still hurt.” You nodded, knowing that she was right but still feeling as if you should be over him. “Do you still love him?”

You laughed at the thought, an empty smile on your lips as you pondered the best way to describe the feeling.

“I… I don’t know what else to tell you, y/n. I just think that we’ve been doing this for so long… you’re all I know.” He explained, avoiding your eyes at all costs. Your heart was breaking more with each word, your sixteen year old self never having faced such a massive loss before.

“And that’s a bad thing?” You asked, tears slipping down your cheeks. “I mean, we always talked about forever, Sam. You’ve always been my forever; I don’t need to know anything else.”

“You’ll always be my forever, Rapunzel.” He finally looked up, also unable to bear the thought of not living a life alongside you. “Just… right now, I need some space.” After sixteen years of being inseparable, you were trying your best to digest the thought of not spending every day with him. It killed you, but you were not willing to sacrifice your dignity for something that was not worth it. If he wanted to leave, you would hold the door just to make sure it wouldn’t hit him on the way out.

“Okay.” You took a long gulp of air, holding your breath and holding in the sobs begging to be heard. You walked to your bedroom door, twisting the handle and pulling it open. You stood by, waiting for him to take the hint.

“Okay?” He asked, hurt by your lack of fight. “That’s it?”

“That’s it, Sam. If you want to go, then go.” You said, lip quivering at the thought of him walking out. “If you want to break up with me, do it, but you don’t get to be upset when I let you. Why would I fight for you when you don’t want to fight for me?” He watched your face, agony striking him at the thought of being the cause of your pain. After a moment of shared silence, he gave a slow nod.

“Friends?” He asked, taking a step towards you. You watched in disbelief, unsure if he really thought you could remain friends after such a conversation.

“Yeah, sure.” You lied, knowing that once he walked outside, you had no intent of ever letting him back in. He gave you a sad smile, wishing he could hug you but knowing that it was best to leave you alone. He wasn’t even fully into the hallway before you were rushing to close the door, tears pouring down your cheeks at the idea of being without him.

“Do you remember the first time we broke up?” You asked, forcing the words through gritted teeth. “I know you were young, but-“

“I remember.” She said, cutting you off. “It’s hard to forget. I don’t think I ever saw you like that before.”

“When he left, I swore that would be the end of it, but I knew I was still in love with him.” You explained. “Just like every time after that. He left, I promised I was done, and then I’d let him come back. I let him hurt me so many times until I couldn’t take it anymore, and I had to go. You’d think after all of this time I would have learned my lesson, but I saw him last night and all I wanted to do was let him come back… let him come home.” You chuckled, shaking your head at your own stupidity. “The only thing I know how to do is love him, and the only thing he knows how to do is hurt me.”

“Do you think he changed?” She asked, listening intently to your words.

“I was hoping he did. He looks different, he acts different… god, he even sounds different, but when I look at him, something in his eyes always reminds me that it’s the same old Sam. I know that he hasn’t changed, which is good in a way, but that also means he’s still the exactly same person I fell in love with all those years ago, which is horrible.”

“Again, Sam?” You were angry, that much was clear. He cowered under the weight of your emotions, barely prepared for the blowout waiting to happen. “You let me fall in love with you just so you could break up with me again?”

“I’m sorry, y/n.” He muttered, running a a hand through his hair. “I didn’t… I missed you so much as a friend. When we got back together, I was so happy to have you around again that I didn’t realize I’m still not ready for a relationship.”

“Senior prom is in two months, Sam! What the hell am I supposed to do now?”

“I still want to go with you, Rapunzel. That was never a question.” He said, desperate to ease your worry. He reached a hand out to you, hoping that touch might calm your hurt, but you brushed him off without second thought.

“What if I don’t want to go with you? Did you think of that?” You snapped, not really meaning it, but even if you wanted to go with him, you knew it wasn’t good for you. Every time you let Sam come back around, he just seemed to hurt you more. The happiness of your childhood was long forgotten and replaced by all of the pain he’d caused you. Sometimes, it was hard to even imagine the simplicity the two of you once felt together. “You know what? Just go. I don’t have time for this.” You shook your head, realizing you were fighting a losing battle.

“I’m sorry, y/n.” He whispered, making a move to stand.

“I’m so sick of hearing that you’re sorry. Please go, and don’t try and come back. Im done, Sam.” You refused to look at him, completely missing the pain-stricken features of his face. He hated hurting you, yet it seemed like there was no way to resolve the issues without it. In hopes of avoiding any further trouble for you, he gave a small nod and turned to walk out of the room. Once again, you watched him walk away while deep down, you hoped that he would find his way back to you eventually. You were stuck, wishing so badly to escape the cycle, but more so than ever, it seemed like it was never ending.

You wished you could say that you stuck to your word, but when June of your senior year rolled around and nobody else peeked your interest as a prom date, you were left wondering why it would be so bad to go with Sam. You had always planned to do so, and you already had a dress that matched his tie. You wanted your last high school memory to be with your most important person, and it felt almost foolish to go with anyone else. So, with a shred of hope and a lot of courage, you asked Sam if he would still be willing to be your date to prom. He was ecstatic to accompany you and in truth, he was hoping you would change your mind after denouncing him from your life.

As friends, the two of you dressed to the nines and smiled through a night full of photographs. The awkwardness wore off almost immediately and you were back to your old selves, laughing over old memories and crying over your own stupidity. By the end of the night, you were both tipsy and reminiscing on the better times and confessing how miserable life was without each other. As if the stars had aligned perfectly to guide you into the darkest breakup of your life, a messy hookup cemented yours and Sam’s relationship as lovers once again. You graduated from high school and spent the entire summer immersed in each other. The air seemed different, more clear than it had been the last time you two had found your way back to each other. You had small fears about leaving for university, worried that your relationship was not strong enough to make it through the pressure of long distance, but it appeared that Sam was a changed man.

You spent your first year of university taking turns driving to see each other, spending every holiday glued together at the hip, and called whenever you had a spare minute. You survived your gruelling work with sweet messages from him and nights shared in your tiny dorm bed, and you were more in love with him than you ever thought to be possible. It was different than your younger years because back then, love didn’t mean all that much. You really didn’t know what it meant to love someone else so completely, and it all seemed a little silly in comparison to what you felt for him as you got older. He was your whole world, but even better than it was before. It seemed like the pain was obsolete, long forgotten and left in the past to die there. You both grew up, got out of your hometown and away from the same group of people who you saw every single day. It was a fresh start, something that you both desperately needed, and it served you well.

But, all good things must come to an end, and that time, the end was nothing short of catastrophic.

“Maybe you’re just too invested in the Sam you knew when you were kids.” She offered. “It’s been two years, y/n. If you still feel that way for him, maybe it’s worth a shot to try and get to know the new version of him.”

“I’d love to, but there’s something telling me that it’s just going to end the same way. It never seems like I can love him enough to make him want to stay.” Your voice cracked at the thought, the emotion too profound to hide. You loved Sam with every ounce of your heart and soul, but it never seemed like it was good enough for him, and it never mattered in the end, because he was bound to break you every time you let him get close.

“It’s up to you whether you want to talk to him or not. You know your heart the best, and you know him the best. If you don’t think it’s worth it, then please don’t give in to him. If you think he deserves another chance, then do it. Whatever you decide, I’ve got your back, and whatever you do, just don’t let him make you think that you’re not good enough, because it’s not true.”

“Thank you, bug.” You reached out for her hand, giving it a gentle squeeze. “You should get some sleep and stop worrying about me.”

“I always worry about you, and you always worry about me. It what we do.” She shrugged. “Are you going to bed, too?” You nodded, looking at the time displayed in green numbers on the stove.

“Yeah, probably should.” You said, but you were in no rush to get up and go. Your bed was haunting you with Sam’s memory, making it impossible to forget about him even in a slumber. His name was plastered on the walls and his face had seeped into the foundation, making it impossible to get away. He was the whole world, and you were just living in it. Everywhere you turned led you straight to another reminder of him, and it was sickening. But, even in the sickness, there was an odd comfort that came along with it. Being heartbroken over Sam had become the most consistent thing in your life, and being thrown so violently into it again, the familiarity made the stay more comfortable.

“If you can’t sleep, you can stay in my room.” She offered, a tired smile on her face. “Do you remember when we used to do that as kids?”

“Of course I do.” You chuckled. How could you forget? When your parents would fight, usually keeping everyone awake at night, she would sneak to your room to stay in bed with you. Usually, Sam was there, too. The three of you would always sleep soundly together in bed, no care about the lack of space or the uncomfortable positions because your company allowed for her to get some rest. When you and Sam would fight, you would find solace in her room because your own was too hard to be in. Back then, she didn’t know why you so often stayed the night in her room, and your tears would not fall until she was long asleep. When she started to get older, she understood better without you ever having to tell her.

“I’ll leave my door open just in case.” She promised, making a move to stand. “I love you.”

“I love you, El.” You gave a weak smile, watching as she disappeared up the stairs. It took you a while to find the courage to follow, but after a few moments, you made your way to your own bedroom. It felt like there was weights around ankles, dragging you down in hopes of delaying your return. Your bedroom was the last place you wanted to be, but you knew that after all you had overcome, you could conquer the last obstacle in your way of removing Sam from your life. Once you convinced yourself that his aura no longer lived inside your bedsheets, you would be better for it.

You closed your door softly behind you, letting out a long sigh to rid yourself of the looming torment of the night. You crawled into bed, checking the time once more to see that it was close to sunrise, now. You looked out at the sky, noticing the darkness slowly turning into purple and pinks. You let your head fall back on the pillow as you stared at the ceiling, noticing the pathetic illumination from the glow in the dark stickers you’d placed on it years ago. You let your eyes close, but your mind did not quiet even in the darkness.

Then, it came like a premonition of imminent disaster.

A weak thud sounded on the glass of your window, echoing through the entire room as if it was a noise so powerful it shook the foundation. But, it was not loud, nor was it anything that was truly attention grabbing. Perhaps the only reason you heard it so clearly was because you were listening for it, hoping it would happen. In truth, you could have ignored it and realized that it was likely due to nothing more than the wind blowing something against the glass, but your brain would not allow you to believe it was a coincidence.

It’s almost funny how the simplicity of a moment can appear so extravagant in our minds.

You slowly stood, cautiously approaching the sill with disbelief written all over you. With hope in your heart, you looked out into the night, first noticing the gentle sway of the tree line in the breeze. Your gaze drifted down towards the ground, eventually settling on an outline of a body. You blinked twice, just to be sure that the figure was still there after you refocused your eyes. You leaned closer to the glass, finding the features on his face break through the darkness with the utmost clarity. You flipped the lock, slowly sliding the window open as your heart swelled with affection. Even if you hated him, you could never seem to be mad when he showed up at your house with love in his eyes and hope in his heart.

“I didn’t know if you would answer, but I had to try.” He confessed, his voice a little raspy and his words ending with a slight slur.

“You’re drunk, Sam.” You whispered, but you couldn’t seem to turn him away.

“I know, I’m hammered.” He said, nodding his head. “Everyone told me I should go home, but I’m drunk, and I miss you, and this is the only home I know. You’re home, Rapunzel, and I’m so stupid for thinking otherwise.”

“Sam,” you sighed, almost wishing he never came. As much as you wanted to invite him inside, you knew it was a terrible idea.

“Please,” he pleaded, taking a step closer. He was so tall he could almost reach the windowsill himself without your help. “I know I don’t deserve anything from you, y/n, but I just want to talk.” You were frozen in place, unsure of how to handle the situation. You wanted to let him in, but you so badly wanted to tell him to leave and never come back. Every option was painful, and every decision was hard. You wished for once it could be easy with Sam, no matter which way it went. You just wanted it to be simple, for one decision not to be laced with regret or remorse. “Let your hair down? For old times sake?” He asked, looking up at you with nothing but love in his eyes.

You watched him, wondering if it was really him standing down there or if it was a figment of your drunken and delusional imagination. After a few seconds, you gave a small nod, popping the screen out of the window. You placed it on the floor and leaned down, holding your hands out for him to grab. He wasted no time responding, allowing you to pull him up just enough to grab the ledge. From there, he navigated the rest of the way himself. You took a step back, allowing him to move without worry of bumping into you. Once he was steady on his feet in front of you, you could see the emotion in his face. His eyes looked bloodshot, puffy just the same as yours were. He was exhausted, clearly going through just as much turmoil as you had that night.

“What are you doing here?” You asked, unsure why you even let him inside in the first place.

“I don’t know,” he said, running a hand through his hair. “I know that you don’t want to see me, and I know why, but I couldn’t… I couldn’t just let you walk away again. I had to try, and even if you tell me to leave and that you never want to see me again, at least I know for sure.”

“Sam, we’re not… We’re not the same people, anymore. You can’t just show up at my window and expect me to let you inside. You can’t just say sorry and expect things to go back to normal.”

“But you did let me in. That counts for something, right?” You couldn’t argue with his logic, because you did allow him inside. As much as you would have liked to blame him for the ridiculous situation you had found yourself in, your own stupidity played a large part in the outcome. “Jake told me this was a terrible idea, and maybe he was right, but I got further than anyone thought I would.”

“Don’t be an idiot, Sam.” You mumbled. “You know I’ll always let you in.” You look to the floor, almost ashamed at the confession.

“And I appreciate that, even if I know I don’t deserve it.”

“You don’t,” you agreed “but you made the effort, so I have to give you that, at least.”

“I’m sorry, princess. For everything.”

“We’re long past that, honey.” You chuckled, taking a seat on the edge of your bed as you pulled a blanket over your shoulders. “Why are you here?” You asked again, waiting for a real answer. So far, you had only grown more confused by his drunken rambling.

“I don’t know, to apologize?” He said, taking a seat in your computer chair. He had enough sense to know that his presence was not welcome on the bed with you. “When you told me we could go for drinks some other time, I knew you didn’t mean it. You planned to ignore every text and call until you went back to university, and then we’d never see each other again. I couldn’t risk that, because these last two years without you have been miserable.”

“You could have apologized two years ago.” You offered, feeling more awake than before. The anger rising in your heart was a great adrenaline boost, and you were ready to face him with all of the hurt you’d been feeling since the last time you saw him.

“I tried, you didn’t want to hear it.” He argued.

“I wonder why.” You rolled your eyes, astonished at his inability to own up to the truth. He was not the victim nor was he a saint; your lack of communication stemmed directly from his inability to grow up and be in a relationship, and he had no right to be upset about it.

“I don’t. I know why, y/n, but it doesn’t mean I liked it. I fucked up that night, and I have been living with that every day since. I’m trying to make it right, but it seems like you don’t want me to.”

“That night?” You asked, raising an eyebrow. “Sure, you put the nail in the coffin, but you fucked up plenty more times than just that night. You’ve been breaking my heart since we were old enough to understand what that meant. Maybe I don’t want to let you back in because I’m fucking terrified you’ll do it again.”

“I know.” He sighed, closing his eyes to regain his confidence. He could not express the guilt he felt for all he put you through, but he was trying his best to explain it. He did not want to argue, and he did not want to portray himself as angry, because he wasn’t. He deserved every harsh word that you were throwing his way. “I can’t take that back even if I wish I could, but I can tell you that I am so sorry I did that to you. You are the most wonderful person in the whole world; you’re my best friend, my soulmate, and I know that you’re the love of my life, even if I’m not yours anymore. I hate that I hurt you, and I hate that I don’t know how to fix it, but I still love you, y/n. My life has been empty, even if I’m travelling the world and doing what I love. At first, I wasn’t sure why, but now I know it’s because you’re not there with me. I miss you so much that it’s hard to think about anything else.” You watched him, curious about his profoundly disturbing confession. It was sweet, but it was not the Sam you knew. All those years ago, he was just a boy who had no idea how to express himself. Words were always difficult, and he never knew how to say I love you without lacing it into a joke.

Maybe, in some violent twist of fate, he really had grown up.

“How long have you been working on that one?” You asked, pulling the blanket tighter against your body.

“Two years.” He replied without hesitation.

“Two years and that’s all you’ve got?” You gave a small laugh, but this one was genuine. You looked up to meet his eye, the snide comment striking him odd until he saw the playful gleam in your face. “I expected more from you.”

“You know I’ve never been good at this stuff.” He found himself smiling, too. “So you’ve been thinking about me, too?”

“Stupid question.” You snipped. “You already know the answer.”

“Yeah, me too. Obviously.” He gave a nervous laugh. “I thought that you forgot about me. When I look at your Instagram, it just seems like you’re a whole different person. I’m happy you got out of here and you look like you’re doing okay. Your new friends seem cool, too, but I miss you and I wish I could be a part of that life, too.”

“You could have, Sam.” You reminded, not wanting to talk too much about the incident in which severed the ties between you. “But you do, too. I listened to some of your music off the new album. It’s fantastic, and I’m happy for you.”

“Thank you.” He whispered, touched that you cared enough to listen to it despite your ill feelings towards him. “You’re almost finished school, now. Where are you going next?”

“I don’t know,” You shrugged, hating the small talk you had fallen into. You knew Sam too well for such simple formalities. “Away from here, but that’s all I really know.”

“You always wanted to get out of here,” he chuckled, recalling the endless conversations about your desire to leave the town behind. “Times finally come.” He couldn’t help but feel a sense of sadness at the idea, knowing that once you packed your bags, you would never come back. There would be no late night sneaking around, no conversations about the future under the stars in your backyard. He was ecstatic for you to move on and start living, but he was also sad for the kids who used to dream about doing it together.

“It’s scary, but I’m ready.”

“You’ve been ready since you learned how to walk.” He corrected. “Do you want to leave me behind, too?” Your heart broke at the sight of the pain in his eyes, knowing that once you were gone, it could be the end of a lifetimes worth of love.

“Come on, Sam. We both know you left first, and a long time ago at that.” You muttered, nervously playing with the hem of the blanket. “Besides, knowing us, we’re bound to run into each other again somewhere. Just the way it works for us.”

“We don’t have to wait to run into each other again.” He said, begging to meet your gaze again. “We ran into each other tonight, and it has to be for a reason.” Your eyes flickered to his face, also in search of the familiarity, yet scared to see the foreignness.

“I think after all this time, we should know the reason is no good.” You tried to stand your ground, even if you wanted nothing more than to invite him in. It was wrong, and it would end so badly that you would never be able to pick up the broken pieces again. Loving Sam was painful, and your brain was begging you to remember that. Even when it was good, it seemed to hurt somewhere.

“I changed, y/n, and I really want to show you that. I still love you the same, but I’ll do it better this time, if you give me the chance.”

“We can’t just pretend that the past didn’t happen.” You shook your head, appalled that he was even suggesting it. “It’s too much Sam, and after everything, we should know that it’s never going to work.”

“I want to make it work, Princess. For you, I’d do anything. I know that I haven’t been the best, but I want to be the best, now. You deserve it, and I’m not saying I deserve another chance, but I would like to prove to you that you are my whole world.”

“I can’t… you can’t just come in here and expect me to forgive you and come crawling back again. It’s too much, and I’m better than that, now. I love you, but I can’t let you hurt me, again.”

“Just come out for dinner with me. Or drinks, or whatever you want. One night, just to hear what I have to say. No strings attached, just fun, like we used to do.” You watched him, unbelieving of his determination despite the pain he had caused. You loved him, that was certain, but after so long of loving someone and only being burned in response, you could not find that hope in your heart that you once had. The whole notion was ridiculous, and the fact that he’d shown up drunk at five in the morning to profess it was even worse. Sam had no ability to speak his truth when he was sober, and you feared that his courage would wear off when the morning came. Even worse than that, you feared that his drunken confession stemmed from the melancholic familiarity of seeing you, and not because he was genuine in his desire to try again.

You loved him, but it was not worth the risk. It hardly ever was, and you should have learned that years ago.

“No,” you shook your head. “I don’t think that is a good idea.”

“Oh.” He breathed, the rejection staggering and cutting him like a knife.

“You should probably go home, Sam. It’s late and we’re drunk. We shouldn’t be doing this.” You said, trying to hide the sadness in your voice.

“Yeah, okay.” He nodded, standing without another word. “C-can I hug you? Just one last time?” You looked up, attempting to ignore the tears that were forming in his tired eyes.

“Yeah, sure.” You agreed, standing, too. You let the blanket fall from your shoulders, practically falling into his arms. Just because you knew he should leave did not mean you didn’t miss his touch. It was home, and you hadn’t felt it in a long time. Perhaps once you felt it again, you could finally come to your senses and realize it was no longer your hiding place, or a safe haven from the harshness of the world. Once his arms were around you and you were enveloped in the warmth and the familiar scent, you knew that you would never love anything more, and that’s exactly why you needed to stay away. You loved Sam so much that it was dangerous, because he did not know how to love you enough. No matter how many chances you gave him, that fact would never change.

Before he pulled away, he placed a kiss on the top of your head. He was aching all over knowing he might be leaving you behind forever, anguished at the fact that it might be the last hug he would ever have from you. “If you ever change your mind, Princess, you have my number.”

“I do.” You nodded, biting back your own tears. “Who knows, maybe someday it’ll be different.”

“I hope so, y/n.” He said, staring out the window and hating the sun that was rising in the sky. The day should never continue as normal when two people were hurting so badly. It seemed like a stab to an already open wound, and there was no sign of ever being able to stitch it back up.

“Bye, Sammy.” You whispered.

“See you later, Princess.” He said, taking one last breath of courage before climbing through the window. You watched as he descended to the ground, his feet firmly planting to the grass before he began his journey home. You waited until he was completely out of view before popping the screen back in place and locking the window shut, keeping out any more visitors and locking in all of your sorrow.

You climbed back into bed, the memory of him still latched onto your mattress and buried in the pillows. You knew that not even time could rid him from the place, because after so many years, it was more his than it was your own. You wiped the tears away from your cheeks, feeling no sympathy for yourself despite the overwhelming ache that settled in your chest. Your hurt was solely because of your own inability to control yourself around Sam; after all, he could not cause any pain if you did not allow him to, and allowing him to hurt you had become your favourite pastime. Opening that window for him was nothing but an excuse to worsen your suffering. The temporary fix for your loneliness was barely enough to take away from the lasting damage his company always seemed cause. Nothing had changed except for the maturity of your faces, and even if you hated to admit it, it never would.

You tossed and turned, begging for a second of sleep, but you were haunted by the interaction that appeared to be completely innocent. Then again, innocence is a thing that neither of you had when it came to each other, and just like your mother used to tell you, nothing good ever happens after 2am. You knew it to be painfully true, but it was even more so when it came to Sam Kiszka. You had opened the door to a whole other world of trouble, and now you couldn’t seem to latch it shut. Even when you managed to drift into sleep, your mind was still plagued with memories of the boy you were begging to forget.

TAGLIST: @itsafullmoon @freefallthoughts @lightsofthe-living-gvf @heckingfrick @sagekiszka

98 notes · View notes

prospectivehero · 9 months

Text

THIS IS SO IMPORTANT GUYS!

First and foremost, I have two confessions. One, I haven't read Red Hood: Outlaws WebToon. It's on my list, but I will admit that I'm missing context. Two, though I talk about disability, my main focus is physical walking disabilities. This commentary should apply to every physically disabled human being if I'm doing this correctly, but I chose to have a specific focus for the sake of brevity.

I'd have very few nickles if I could have one for every time I saw a wheelchair-dependent character get suddenly healed. But it's still too many nickels. I can't blame Marvel or DC for my poor relationship with my own mobility aids. It didn't help anything to see Barbara Gordon or Charles Xavier suddenly be able to walk after seeing them for so long in their wheelchairs. Recovery and recuperation should never be scoffed at. We should celebrate when we can accomplish difficult goals and be happy for others who achieve what they thought was impossible. But these characters' changes aren't about recuperation. They're about ignorance.

Recuperation doesn't always mean full recovery from the viewpoint of a disabled person. Sometimes, "walking quickly" or "standing independently" isn't the end goal. It's usually more complicated than that. Small things like strengthening the core or practicing distance walking in a walker are crucial for someone's health or mobility. If it means they can walk independently in the process, then cheers! But sometimes standing isn't a possibility anymore. Many able-bodied people, without this context, may perceive this attitude as "giving up." I've had to explain to several different people that my choosing my wheelchair over my crutches to be a more functional human is not the same thing as quitting. But society has a model for success, and that model has a healthy set of legs.

Growing up, it broke my heart when I saw a character who had to experience a permanent and life-altering disability being suddenly cured. That's not a story of recuperation. That's a writer trying to "fix" something that was "wrong". I don't think the writers mean that as an insult. It's a terrible trope that's rooted in ignorance. But that ignorance is commonplace. It makes self-acceptance all the more difficult for a person who doesn't have full use of their body. Instead of being a person in a room who happens to use a wheelchair, that person suddenly becomes a paria because they are "physically incorrect."

Barbara Gordon, still paralyzed, marrying Dick Grayson is important. In their most standard form, weddings are supposed to be beautiful and romantic. Most of us dream about being the most beautiful, best versions of ourselves that we've ever been for one of the most special days of our lives. Barbara was the best version of herself when her father wheeled her down the aisle. She was Batgirl and is now Oracle, but she never stopped being Barbara. She is loved by her father, her adopted family, and her husband. The saccharine nature of that scene had nothing to do with a disabled woman being loved by an able-bodied man. It was a sappy, beautiful wedding being celebrated by our favorite dysfunctional found family.

I'm honestly really excited to read this webtoon. It is about Jason Todd, but the care and respect Patrick R. Young shows in this scene and how well it was depicted by Nico Bascuñán says a lot about how they handle the rest of whatever story they tell in this comic.

#red hood outlaws #dc comics #superhero #batgirl #barbra gordon #dick grayson #nightwing #writing disability #disabled representation #disabled pride #disability #batfam #red hood #future hero theory #dickbabs

73 notes · View notes

thecynthh · 5 months

Text

smart ass - M.S pt 5

synopsis - matt’s not doing to well with his schooling but is determined to get his degree and pass his classes. one essay which is a huge part of their grade haunts him with a bad mark, luckily y/n is willing to help him

notes - NOT PROOF READ, lowercase intention smut near the end, aftercare cus thats what matt specializes in, cuddles

a/n - uhm idk if yalls could tell, or if u knew but i’m a virgin and have never kissed anyone so 🫣

leave some suggestions for chris or matt fics for me to write pls as well :3

——————————————————————————

present day a few days after their second study session

y/n pov

matt s 🐼

hey message me when ur leaving ur house. 8:46

btw we r ordering food to the house cus i dont wanna get gas. 8:47

text me what u want from CFA. 8:47

you

what in the flying fuck is CFA? 8:49

matt s 🐼

uhm hello? kid, how do u not know what CFA is???? 8:49

you

abbreviations like this is what's wrong with our generation… 8:50

matt s 🐼

kay ur so weird omfg. 5:50

CFA clearly means chick-fil-a smartass 🙄. 8:51

you

oh well then 😋. nuggets and waffle fries please 🛐🛐. 8:52

and sunjoy btww. 8:52

matt s 🐼

ew u like sunjoy? 8:53

you

u like rootbear don’t talk to me ✋. 8:52

and let me in pls im already outside :). 8:52

read at 8:52

i sling my bag over my shoulder and leave my car, waiting outside the large house with thrilling anticipation as i wait for matt to open the door. I see the fluff of his brown locks and a sweater similar to the one i’ve seen him wear before at school. i dont know why i get giddy when i see him, i dont know how we went to only speaking when madi was around too greeting each other whenever we see each other in the halls or cafe or even in our shared classes.

matt and his brothers were some of my closest friends now, after madi introduced me to them at a party, both of us got insanely drunk and made me call off crazy drinking ever since. all i remember from that night was the way matt took care of me while i was in a very vulnerable state and didn’t take advantage of me. i haven’t told anyone but madi about what happened to me when i was younger, and i’m glad she’s still taken her promise to heart, the only thing that telling her about my past shit did was make her and i closer.

i see matt in full view after he opens the door, “hey!” i say with a cheery expression despite how late it was for me.

“heyyy, thanks for coming by the way, even though you had a shift earlier.” he says sheepishly, before i left for work he messaged me begging to have another study session because he had more questions about the essay part of the exam. “oh hey lemme put your stuff in my room, just chill on the couch before the food gets here.” i pass him my backpack and laptop as he begins to walk down a hallway to make it to his room.

i move through the small entryway and become more apparent in his brothers view, “heyy y/n” nick says moving up to me for a hug, i take in his embrace.

“hi nick!!” i say excitedly. other than matt, ive hung out with nick a lot too, madi always has him over at her apartment, and even the three of us have made it a plan to meet up at our favourite bakery and talk for however long we want too a couple times a week. out of the little over a month i’ve know the triplets, nick has made a huge impact on me, and i felt safe around him, as well as chris and matt.

he lets go of me while i walk over to a slumped over chris on the couch, when he realised i was here he sits up on the edge of the couch. “sup chris,” i dap him up doing a little bro half hug with him.

“always nice to see you y/n,” he says as our arms unfold from the middle of us. i take a seat next to him with a comfortable amount of distance between us. matt returns not too long after i greet everyone. He sits down between chris and i and nick returns from the kitchen with a pepsi, root beer, bottled water and a lemonade, passing out everyone's drink knowing what each of us would ask for. matt and i give nick a thank you as he nods his head after.

nick stationed himself on the elongated part of the couch settling in with his fluffy blanket, he puts on a stranger thing episode and we all sit watching the tv. it only takes another five minutes of the episode for the doorbell to ring through the house. nick gets up immediately scurrying to the door with his fluffy blanket wrapped around him as he talks to the delivery man, thanking him and making small steps to see the rest of us. he comes back with two large bags of food planting them on the coffee table in front of all of us, before grabbing a tray of drinks after going back to the entrance.

“thank you for paying matty,” chris says, rubbing up again his brother with his lips pursed and now shoulder to shoulder with his older brother. i giggle at the sight, copying chris.

“mmmmh thanks mattyyyy” i say resting my head on the peak of his shoulder, pursing my lips as well and copying chris’ weird voice.

“you’re a fucking weirdo chris,” matt says in a disgusted voice flicking the other head that was very close to his face. “and you're welcome y/n.”

i laugh at chris’ overly dramatic reaction to what matt did to him. still giggling a bit at the sight of matt completely ignoring his brothers reaction, I say “just tell me how much i own you.”

“eh, don’t worry about it, it’s on me, plus save up for that new laptop you were talking about. i know how much you want it,” i blush slightly.

“aww thank you then,” i wrap my arms around him and squeeze him, he hands me the food that i asked for and retract back onto the couch.

“by the way, what time are we planning to stay up till? i told madi that i’ll tell her when i was heading home.” i saw looking at matt.

“well its kinda late so if you wanna stay in the guest room, im fine with that.” matt says, moving his head towards me, then breaking eye contact with the tv screen.

“im ay okay with that if you wanna stay over! plus you know your way around the house,” nick says giving his approval to matts idea of staying over.

“mhm im chill with it,” chris simply says.

“uhh yeah then, i'm down, thanks!”

we eat then say goodnight to nick and chris before we go to matt's room for some studying.

i lay down onto his bed as he walks over to his bathroom to change into some comfier clothes. while hes in there i start to think about our first study session when i found out matt had a crush on me. i thought it was very cute, but it made matt awkward on our last study night. i’m glad that he's eased up now, i just acted like i didn’t know anything and didn’t want to push on how he was feeling because I knew it would make his anxiety worse.

i come back to my senses seeing matt reappear from the bathroom door. we stayed on track for studying for an hour and a half before we eventually put on brooklyn 99 on in the background and talked.

“so, the retake is in a couple days, you think you’re ready?” i was hopeful he would be good by then because tonight felt very productive. I quizzed him on a couple of important ideas while he was playing with a baseball, throwing it up and down in the air. i learnt that he understands stuff better when he is doing something with his hands, it keeps him focused.

“hm, i’m not too sure, maybe another study sesh the day after tomorrow so by friday i’ll have all the stuff we went over fresh in my mind.” the baseball still gets thrown up and falls down in front of his face, with his hand waiting to catch it before it smacks him right on his nose. “thanks again for this,” i hear him catch it one more time before he moves his hand away from his face and looks at me just to the right of him. i'm hovering over him slightly, his eyes glow the brightest in the slight illumination from the lamp we always use when we study.

“yeah of course matt, you're my friend anyways.” our faces mirror each other, his eyes roam my faces while his hand holds the side of my face.

i toss my hair to the side of my head to lean down to kiss matt, he immediately returns the kiss enveloping my bottom lip with his. i moan into his mouth feeling him push me down and dominate me. one of his hands rests on my hip keeping me down as i pull him down with my legs letting him top me. most of his body is pressed down to mine, i lift my hips to give myself some kind of sensation i desperately crave for.

“fuck, i’m sorry are you okay with this?” matt says when he disconnects us.

i cup his chin bringing him a little closer, “i really fucking like you matt, please don’t stop.”

a smirk grows onto his face, “i really fucking like you too, you’re lucky i do.” he becomes more unserious pecking little kisses amoungst my face making a very loud “mwah” sound with each of he presses into my skin.

“matttt” i say through my sour looking face while he shows his affection.

“okay, okay, i’m done. but uh, how about we kiss again, didn’t get a good feel of it the first time.” he says with a knowing smirk on his face. i use my hand to weave through his brunette hair pulling him towards me again, we share a more passionate kiss, with knowing and love rather than lust.

it doesn’t take us long till things got more serious, his lips attach to my neck instantly sucking multiple hickeys into visible spots on my neck, moving down to my collar bone and eventually to the full and plump part of my boob. this is where my dream stopped last week, ive been trying to ignore it for the longest time but being in the moment now after thinking about it in my head makes it feel even more surreal.

his hand sneaks to the bottom of my fresh love shirt that i took from matt’s drawers when i found out i was sleeping here his fingers feel the hem of it. “is it alright if i take your shirt off?” he says with a quiet voice, almost afraid of what i’ll say.

i quickly nod in reply but that doesn’t seem good enough for him.

“words smart ass, i need words.” he says with a little bit of a condescending tone to his love tainted words.

“yes matt, you can take my shirt off too.” i say with a small giggle following after it.

he lifts the fabric to uncover the same white lace bra i was wearing while i slept over at his house by accident. “mh, i’ve been dreaming about this for a while ever since i saw you in it that morning,” he kisses the lace that travels to the small connecting piece of fabric between the two cups of my bra.

“and i know you heard what chris said to me that morning, yet you still acted like nothing was wrong.” he moves his hand to my upper back placing his hand onto my bra strap, “hey, can i take this off?”

“mhm,” my lips sealed trying to conceal my response to the amazing feeling of his hands on my body, he undoes the clip on my back with skill and purpose. the touch of his fingertips grant goosebumps to my skin in a very arousing manner.

he pulls the dainty clothing article off my arms and throws it to the floor benign absolutely amazed by my tits, they weren’t much but it seemed like matt was under a spell, he latched his lips just above my nipple to give me more hickeys, he sucks and soothes repeating this multiple times before he eventually dips down to my nipple, i feel the rush of arousal arching slightly off the bed.

i moan in response to the new sensation, i’m not exactly a virgin, but i haven’t done anything like this in a while, let alone at all for god sake. he massages the other boob, playing with the nipple with his hand the opposite of the one his mouth is very focused on.

he finally comes up for air after a little bit teasing, my thighs rub together and sits up to rip his shirt off to match my level of revealing skin, off goes his sweats as well leaving him in just his boxers, “matt, oh my god” i'm out of breath and very needy.

he continues a trail of kisses down to my clothes pussy, he looks up at me while holding the stretchy waistband of my pants, i give him a vigorous nod knowing what he was asking for.

he slides them completely off leaving me in just my underwear. he plants another sweet kids over my clothed heat which milks another desperate moan from me. “matt wait-“ he immediately comes up from my bottom half and lays beside me listening to me.

“hey we don’t have too if you don’t want too, i’m down if you just wanna go to bed in the other room, or even if you just wanna stay here and cuddle for the rest of the night.” he says before i can go ahead with what i was thinking.

“no, no i really want too it’s just, i haven’t really… done this before.” i tell him, he seems almost fully unaffected by my words.

“that’s fine, i’m here to make you feel good,” he places his hand nearing my core again, he rubs my panties over my clit moving down to feel the very apparent wet spot. “wow i’ve barely touched you and your so worked up,” his voice was sultry with a hint of a condescending tone.

“m-matt please” i struggle to say feeling the pressure he's putting down onto my throbbing clit.

“i’m gonna take these off now, okay?” he says with his fingers wrapped around the thin string of my thong that’s barely covers anything.

he slips them off admiring the sight in front of him, i almost get self conscious wanting to cover myself up with his blankets. his head dips and his hands pant onto my hips and one on my inner thigh. his tongue makes very sudden contact with my clit, he sucks and swirls his tongue around it, feeling the very heavy pressure i arch my back slighting leaning forward into his face.

his finger creeps and teases my hole before he fully plunged it into me. i heavy moan escapes my lips, “quiet now princess, can’t let nick or chris hear you.”

he continues his movements stimulating both my clit and hole at the same time, “more, please” i say with a pleading tone. he removes his finger from inside of me and replaces it with his tongue and mouth. he absolutely devoured my pussy giving me as much pleasure as he could, his mouth moving back to my clip and he slid his finger back into me moving it at a moderate pace.

i don’t try very hard to conceal my very loud moans, as soon as matt enters a second finger into my dripping cunt, i release with a pornographic moan, squeezing his head between my legs. “holy shit matt,” he licks up all of my hot cum and comes back up to kiss me.

“mmh you did so well for me, you ready for me now?” i say a needy yes while he goes back to sit back on the his headboard. he removes his boxers with such haste letting his cock spring out with a bead of pre-cum leaking out. “i wanna watch you ride me, you control the pace and how deep you wanna go.” he whispers into my ear.

he lifts me on top of him, kissing him passionately while i grind down onto his twitching cock. he lets out a guttered groan “okay, let’s do this cause i could bust just from looking at you.”

he lines himself up and holds my hips while i sink down onto him. his so thick and long, i feel him in ever existing crevasse in my cunt. “fuck yes” i say letting out a heavy breath.

“holy shit you’re so tight-“ he says between his monas and hard breathes. i begin to move myself up and down slowly, whatever pain that came at first quickly moved to pleasure as i speed up my movements.

my tits bounce every time i move up or down, my movements are set at a constant pace, “matt, i think- i think i’m gonna cum.” i say, feeling his dick twitch in my pussy again.

“come for me baby, give it to me,” he says, taking me by my love handles and moving me up and down a little faster. i came hearing his words letting out a couple of breathy moans, he follows soon after me. i feel his thick long ropes of cum fill me up and come back down dripping onto his cock.

matt does a couple of slower pumps in and out of me to ride both of us through our highs. he picks me up as if i weigh nothing and puts me down beside him laying down onto the bed.

he goes into the bathroom to retrieve a small cloth and comes back to wipe me down. he does a couple of strips to pick up as much extra cum he could. i feel him hit my clit and i whimper loudly, “oh god, i’m sorry, i know your still sensitive.” once he’s finished he goes into the bathroom and cleans himself up.

fishing his boxers from the ground he slides them on and grabs my underwear and a large t-shirt from his closet. he hops onto the bed putting on my underwear and pulling me up to put on the shirt.

“mh thank you,” i say tired and groggy.

he plants a kiss onto my forehead “anything for you smart ass.”

he comes under the covers and wraps his arms around me, intertwining our legs. we sleep peacefully until the morning

taglist - @westwiing @comet235

#sturniolo triplets #syn speaks #matt sturniolo #matthew sturniolo #chris sturniolo #christopher sturniolo #nick sturniolo #nicolas sturniolo #sturniolo fanfic #sturniolo smut #sturniolo x reader #matt sturniolo smut #matthew bernard sturniolo #matt sturniolo fanfic #matt sturniolo x you #Spotify

37 notes · View notes

mageofseven · 11 months

Text

When Heat Cools: A MephistoMC Love Story

Chapter 9

Taglist: @astroseuss @fcxyviixen @jar-of-moondust @marvelous-maniac @ghost-mint @darkflowerav @missloserqueen

TW: implied r*pe and a scene that, despite not showing it, heavily implies that it comes (or came, since it happened in the past) after that for the character.

If this is an especially triggering topic for you, please either skip the chapter or skip the section written in

Xxxxxxx

the format type shown above.

Oh and snakes. If you are afraid of snakes, the same section won't be to your liking.

It was the next day that MC had gotten a call from Mephisto.

"Hey..." She murmured into the phone. "I'm sorry I fell asleep on you the other day."

"...MC, you literally had another man reach into and manipulate your soul in order to read it's properties." The nobleman spoke in disbelief.

Does the woman really not understand how dangerous and extreme what she went through was? Was it better that she didn't?

"Yeah, I know but..." The human's voice trailed of as she laid a hand of her belly.

In truth...she was just feeling self-conscious about having to be taken care of and knew as her pregnancy progressed, this apparently very special pregnancy, that she will likely have more times when she will have to lean on him when she is more used to having him lean on her.

Mephisto huffed and shook his head on the other line.

"Look, just don't worry about it." He told her before pursing his lips. "I...listen, I need you to come to my home after dinner today."

MC raised her eyebrows. Despite their long, weird friendship, the human has never been to their boyfriend's home before.

"Uh...why exactly...?"

"My parents...have received Lord Diavolo's message and wish to speak with both of us." He explained. "Though I do believe they have ulterior motives, I also believe they do want to meet the woman I am risking so much for more."

Oh. Oh devil. I mean, meeting your partner's parents for the first time is often not the easiest thing in the world, but when they already hate you and blame everything going wrong on you and literally wanted you dead but MC doesn't know this?

This was honestly really scary for the woman.

"Mi corazón, it will be alright." He cajoled. "I will be right beside you; you'll be safe."

"What if they grow to hate me more?" She asked. "I don't want to be at odds with your parents forever."

These people wanted to kill her and she is worried about their opinion? Okay, he realizes she doesn't know that, but the man still finds her words a bit ridiculous.

"Now is not the time to worry about how they feel." Mep tugged her back down to reality. "Just...I need you to come, listen to what they have to say and then we will get you a safe distance away from them."

"Do you really think they would hurt me?"

In truth, Dia's message has bound their hands somewhat, but Mephisto didn't want to chance anything, especially with his mother; just like the snakes she controlled, you never knew when she was going to strike.

"I don't know," He spoke truthfully. "But I'd rather take no chances, alright? Now, I'll send a car to pick you up around 6:30pm (18:30) later, alright?"

The human nodded into the phone.

"Alright..."

The car came around later that evening, just as Mephisto said it was. She stepped inside and rode in silence, arm around her belly as she stared out the window.

Was it...stupid that she wanted Mephisto's parents' approval? In truth, she just didn't want anymore fighting. She didn't want Mephisto to deal with his parents' anger and disapproval, didn't want her babies to grow up without grandparents or around drama and hostility.

If only she could just fix things...yet she was at a loss. How could she when in their eyes, MC and her children were the very problem? This is a problem that the human just can't see herself getting passed.

Once the car pulled up in front of a mansion--a mansion that could easily rival Diavolo's castle in size. MC stared at the building from her seat, suddenly intimidated.

Like yeah, she knew her boyfriend and his family were wealthy because because let's face it, Mephisto used to make his family's money a big part of his personality. Still, this wealthy? Like, Diavolo?

The driver opened her door for her, knocking the pregnant human out of her thoughts.

This was the first time MC had really focused on the man who drove her all this way.

This man looked to be in his early twenties by human standards and had medium reddish-brown hair long enough to tie in a tidy ponytail that laid against his shoulder. His horns looked like twigs and were angled in a waysl that the dark brown sticks hid within his hair.

He wore half-frame glasses over warm brown eyes and wore a professional outfit; black slacks, a long sleeve dress shirt, and a dark maroon vest with a bow tie on his somewhat scrawny figure. To top off the look, he had a tail the same color as his vest wrapped around his waist, whether for practicality, as a pretend belt or a constant hug, who knows.

He extended a gloved hand and a polite smile to her.

"Please allow me."

MC hesitated and stared at that the giant mansion behind him, causing the man's eyes to soften.

"You will be with my master; I promise you will have nothing to fear."

The human bit her lip, but accepted his hand.

Suddenly, her vision went bright just as it had in the past and all external sound silenced before the scene filled in.

The man who was originally in from of her and smiling so kindly at her was now at the bottom of what looked to be a snake pit. The man was younger than he appeared outside the vision and was screaming as various snakes coiled around him and bit him till eventually he was paralyzed where he laid.

The man couldn't even blink, but tears still slid down his cheeks as he listened to something big slither from down the dark tunnel in front of him.

From dark emerged a woman, long violet hair, dark eyes that glowed the same violet shade, part of the top an impressive tall figure, the more humanoid half. The bottom half was a long snake-like tail that dissipated into smoke before showing off her long legs.

The woman cut through the pile of snakes like it was the most natural thing in the world and approached the paralyzed man, who was practically a boy in comparison to her.

She leaned in and whispered into his ear.

"Let's see how long you can survive with me."

She takes a long fingernail down his ripped shirt, tracing a line all the way down to his clothed waist.

Her eyes stare down into his, holding a gaze that only be described by MC as evil and mischievous, before gently grabbing at the man's pants and leaning into his neck with her fangs for a bite--

"My lady? My lady?"

The vision was over and MC was back in front of the mansion, her hand in the servant's as she panted and cried from what she just saw.

The human looked up at this poor man, the same man she watched suffer in her vision, and noticed the scarring on his neck, some puncture marks looking like the bite she saw him receive.

It happened. That happened to this man. Oh devil. He couldn't have been more than what? Eighteen? Nineteen physically when that happened to him? That's how he appeared in the vision anyway.

The man in front of her put a gloved hand on her cheek guiding her to look up at his warm brown orbs.

"What is wrong? My lady, are you hurt?" His voice was soft and his hand her cheek was incredibly gentle. Who could ever hurt a man like this? "If have offended you in someway, I do sincerely apologize, truly."

And he did sound so genuine, despite having done not a single thing wrong. He was such a kind and sensitive man...

"No...no..." MC tried to steady her breathing as she wiped the tears from her face. "I...I-Its been hard lately and I guess it just randomly overflowed. I...I'm so sorry; you shouldn't have to see this."

This was the best excuse the woman could give in the moment and in truth, it was a plausible one. After all, no unexpected pregnancy is easy, let alone one where you are recreating the first generation of humankind and having visions of the past--apparently even others' personal pasts.

The man drop his hand from her cheek and stared in pity for a moment.

"I apologize. Do you need a moment alone before we go inside?"

MC took a deep breath before shaking her head.

"I'm fine. Really." MC extended her hand out to him, hoping he would take it again so they could proceed.

The man stared at her for a moment before softly nodding and taking her hand once more.

He carefully helped her out of the car and wrapped another around her back as they climbed the stairs to the front door. It was a protective touch, one out of necessity. After that surprise outburst in the car, the man worried that his master's girlfriend might not be at her best today and did not want her hurting herself. He was respectful with it and the touch ended as soon as they were safely at the top by the door.

Once here, he led her into the foyer where Mephisto waited for her.

The nobleman had stopped pacing just in time not to be caught by his girlfriend; something she surely would have scolded him for if she noticed. Such excessive movement really wasn't good on his bad leg, but it was all he could do to release the nervous energy in situations like this.

As soon as he noticed them walk in, he quickly approached his love, meeting both her and the servant in the middle of the foyer.

"There you are." He took her hand. "Did you eat dinner before you came?"

MC shook her head, refusing to look at him.

"I...didn't really have much of an appetite, if I'm honest..."

Mephisto huffed.

"Those stupid--" The nobleman cut himself off; he can't allow himself to say things that will just upset her right now. "The brothers should have made sure you did. They love to brag how they take care of you, but now that you are eating for more than just yourself, they seem to be slacking."

"Mep--"

Her boyfriend let go of her hand and instead wrapped his arm around her, pulling her close.

"I'll make sure you and the babies eat after this." He promised, rubbing her small belly. "You are not going without, alright?"

Despite everything, his words brought just a little peace to her heart. No matter how much chaos it felt like was filling her day, from her worries about her kids, to her visions, to her impending meeting with her in-laws (she and Mephisto weren't married, but she was carrying his parents' grandchildren so they were pretty much her in-laws), his words gave her feelings of stability and comfort.

Mephisto looked to his servant, the man who drove her here.

"I assume there was no issues? That her ride was comfortable?"

The younger man leaned in and whispered into his master's ear.

Mephisto suddenly had a pained look on his face.

"I...thank you for letting me know, Dorian. I appreciate it." He told his servant.

"Can I do anything else for you two, master?"

"No. We are at risk for running late as it is. Just...thank you again for your help."

The servant, Dorian, gave a small bow before leaving the couple.

Mephisto leaned in and kissed his girlfriend.

"I'm sorry you're having such a hard day." He told her. "Hopefully...hopefully this will be quick and we can move on."

"D...Did he tell you about what happened in the car?" She asked softly.

He nodded.

"It's perfectly fine to be stressed out about everything--"

"It's a bit more than that." She explained. "But like...we'll have to wait till later to talk about it."

Mep pressed his lips to her forehead.

"Alright." He agreed before speaking firmly. "Now I need you to listen to me before we go in there; we need to establish some ground rules before you even step into the same room as my parents."

"Mep...you make me feel as if I just stepped foot into a mafia boss headquarters."

The worst part about that comparison was that what very little Mephisto knew about various human mafia groups did not conflict much with his own family so he could not deny it.

Instead, he pursed his lips for a moment before he continued.

"First, stay next to me; behind me preferably." He began. "Second, do not speak unless spoken to and even then, keep your responses short. I will try to answer most of their questions."

Devil, her heart was pounding and the human couldn't tell if it was all from the situation she was about to walk into or if some of it was still from the vision she had out in the car.

Regardless, she had to move forward.

With his arm still wrapped around her, the nobleman takes his girlfriend down the east hall and into the second room down on the right, into the drawing room.

Here his parents waited for the couple, standing with their gaze towards the door.

MC froze in the doorway as soon as her eyes fell on her mother-in-law.

Tall. Long purple hair. Dark abyssal purple eyes.

She was the woman from her vision. The one...the one who hurt Dorian.

"Mi corazón?" Mep called out to her, but the human couldn't hear him.

Luckily, her boyfriend already had an arm around her so when the human passed out, Mephisto caught her easily enough.

"Well isn't she dramatic?" His mother spit out venomously

And that, along with her boyfriend's pleads, were the last things she heard before the world went dark.

#obey me #obey me otome #obey me mc #obey me mephistopheles #obey me mephistopheles x mc #obey me mephisto x mc #mephistopheles x mc

37 notes · View notes

pretty-prince-lulu · 8 months

Text

I I mister beaned it pretty hard tonight, internet and I feel the need to inflict the experience upon the world at large

be me (honestly I could fucken end it here) walking down the hallway toward the domain of the porcelain throne when out of the corner of my eye I see it

it has been years, actual years now, since I have done true battle yet my nemesis stands before me- rather, scuttles above me, on the ceiling, taunting me with his plumpness a cockroach. my first true enemy in life, really this being the first house I have ever lived in without nests in the foundations or a frame consisting 80% of wood rot meant that I had sadly grown fat on my own complacency and taking peace for granted but I am Ready. I can face this foe

old reliable is at the ready. a 15 year old can of pea-beu! it's an Australian brand of bug spray. 'Hit 'em with the ol' Pea-Beu!' croons the ad! it's pronounced 'pee bow', which is still hilarious to me I psshk him with great noble bearing by which I mean 'from around a corner and at as great a distance as I could physically achieve' and wait for him to drop I wait I wait did I actually get him or I must have? that or he's just ambling down of his own volition either way

KATCHONK the can is placed atop him! he is CONTAINED! now all I must do is wait! so I wait and I wait surely he'sNOPE JESUS MARY MOTHER OF SHIT antennae and legs swing at me from under the can with incredible malice and singular will the can goes back down. and I wait

and at this point I remember! there is one thing that I have never seen pea-beu do that is- fuck, what's the word I'll have it around here somewhere oh yes WORK legs still scrabble in effort to escape I am less and less convinced that he has peed his last bow and more convinced that the next bow to be peed shall be mine

fuck FUCK okay well raising the can is out of the fucking question he's seen me now, he knows my scent and is very clearly out for revenge (probably in the form of running up my leg until I pee my bow) there's a technique I use all the time to rescue crickets from the bathroom though! and this is more of a Special Military Operation (tm) than a rescue but desperate times call for desperate measures and lateral moves so I do it I grab the nearest piece of paper and sliiiide it under the can if I can contain the creature I can have it airlifted to a location that is not my hallway

but I've just made a critical error its on paper now and paper, when confronted with 6 legs of undeniable fury, makes a sound and that sound does something magical that magical thing being compelling our hapless protagonist 30 years backward in time

she's addicted to reading! that's what her parents tell her teachers! we just can't get her to put the books down at night and sleep! ha ha ha! and she does love her books, that little girl but something more sinister is at play when the lights go out is when they awaken by the tens and by the hundreds skinny little barbed legs and long hairlike antennae but they can tell when you're still awake, you know that's when they run around in circles beneath the wallpaper and under the posters that's when they climb over the bedhead and wait sitting in the palm of your hand until you realise that's when you think the breeze is shifting the hair at your temple but the wind is prickly this evening and your eyelashes are only beyond their reach if little blue eyes stay open until dawn but no depth of story can drown out the sound of legs and wings caressing paper

SNAP BACK TO REALITY whoops there goes gravity right bug. can. paper big regretti… mom's spaghetti eminem can't help me now oh god oh no the noise has drawn attention player 3 and player 4 have entered the game

my cats precious fat idiots no hunting instincts between them, frankly the kitten has never hunted anything in his life and the last time the big boy encountered an Animal (tm) it resulted in him screaming, actually s c r e a m i n g and I had to pick him up and rescue him from the VERY scary cricket that had cornered him (the assailant was released outside) but they are interested in THE NOISE and the mystery and if they knock over this fucken can I know it's game over for me I'm still in full on vietnam flashback mode fortunate son is on full blast in my head I cannot handle a prison break

I drive them away the only way I can think of by using the only thing that's as scary to them as a cricket a psshk from a can of compressed keyboard-cleaning air nyoom disaster averted, or at least that specific flavour of disaster of course, the problem remains I cannot pick up the fucking paper. please understand. it's all that stands between me and my nightmares fortunate son is still playing but by now it's on kazoo I deepen my hole of shame a little further and attempt to s l i d e a plastic lid beneath the paper.

now I have it in my hands, a teetering, tenuous tower of can, beast, tupperware lid and a phone bill with a destination to decide what? empty it in a bin? so he can swing over the edge of the paper like lara fucking croft and hoik himself into my open mouth? or run up my sleeve into my hair? as has happened before? no thank you, you little shit, you probably submliminally suggested that yourself didn't you b u g but I can't just. squish it that also risks CONTAINMENT BREACH letting it onto the floor risks my cats eating it (and potentially peeing their bow in 12-19 business years I guess) and so, I compromise

I run outside out the front door. at this point I feel like it is important to note my outfit I am wearing a whole-body lamb costume that I have been using as pyjamas they are very wooly and floor length and have a little silk ribbony bow at the neck, as-yet unpeed

and god knows what the neighbours must think seeing this shrieking lamb kool-aid man out of her house shedding phone bills and pesticide containers and frisbee a tupperware lid across the road like it is made of fire before doing the Universal Dance of Absolute Crawling Horror, complete with arm-flailing and knee-to-chest high-steppy in circles

anyway I lived and I've been told off for sadly humming 'fortunate son' to myself 7 times. some folks are born made to wear the flag :')

#dramatic retelling #I showered immediately #bug tw

9 notes · View notes

pof203 · 25 days

Text

A Summoner Birthday

Special Quest: R-19

This is a nice place, Lupin. Kurogane has definitely fairytale paradise.

Paradise might be a stretch, but I guess that would be the general idea he and Boogeyman had in mind.

You brought R-19 to the virtual fairytale world for some fun.

R-19: I hear you can go diving in the ocean. I would like to see that.

Lupin: Are you sure? You might short circuit.

R-19: You need not worry about that. I was built to be water-proof. Beside, this is a virtual world. The water here is not real. I will be alright.

Lupin: Okay, I guess we can go.

With that, you and R-19 go to the docks.

A little later, you and R-19 are out at sea.

This should be a good place for a dive.

Yes, it is. It is just the right depth for us.

Lupin: (surprised) Is that what you're wearing?

R-19: It is all I could find. (LifeWonders has yet to give me a swimsuit.)

Lupin: Alright then, let's jump right in.

Taking a deep breath, you jump right into the water and R-19 follows you in.

You and R-19 swim freely under the surface of the sea. Happily enjoying what was there. You spot some merpeople going about just having fun. You also saw a school of fish, a pod of whales in the distance, and even...

Yo!

Lupin: (Should have seen that one.)

A little while later, you and R-19 are back on the ship.

Lupin: That was fun. How did you enjoy it, R-19?

R-19: It was a wonderous sight. I will have this day memorized for a very long time.

Lupin: Yeah, me, too.

R-19 looks out at the horizon before him, just watching the sun sink behind the sea.

Lupin: What is it, R-19?

R-19: I am thinking of that day. That day we met. I discovered something I did not think I was ever capable of. I do no know why I got it, but still got it.

Lupin: What did you get?

R-19: I had... emotions. When I met you, I had emotions. Emotions that I did not think I was capable of because I am a machine. When I met you, I felt... awkwardness. Then, I felt happiness. I felt fear. I felt anger. And... I am unsure what to call this feeling. The feeling... that I have now. What is it? I know it has a name, but I do know what it is.

Lupin: Maybe it could... love.

R-19: ... I suppose that could be its name. I am unsure, though. But if you say it is love, perhaps maybe it is so. What is like to love? I know you must know what love is. I see it whenever you are with the others. Especially with Wakan Tanka. He gives his love equally to others, but he seems to give most of it to you. Maybe that is what you are doing to me. You are giving me love.

Lupin: I'm not sure if that's how I would put it. I try to give love the same way Wakan does, but I guess we do it differently. Though we love each other the most, he and I our still different, though we both just wish for love. So if I am giving you love, what do you think of it?

R-19: Well, I know it is not a bad feeling. Whenever I am with you, I feel so happy. It is this feeling I do not wish to end. I want to keep this feeling with me for as long as I can. I do not truly know how long I will have this feeling. In Utopia, love is a rarity and I know there will come I day I may have to return there. But I do wish I could bring this feeling with me.

Lupin: Then do it. I'm sure every one in Utopia will enjoy knowing what love it. I know, I love you and they will love you, too.

R-19: (happy) And I love you, too. I know what you say is true. Not just because you said it, but because I can feel it.

The both of you resonate with each other with love. This love between you two, thought not considered real by some, is not artificial either. Whatever this love it, it's yours and R-19's.

Before both of you know it, it was now nighttime and you both decide to return to Candyland to return home.

#my birthday #birthday #tokyo afterschool summoners #housamo #r-19 #typhon (housamo)

2 notes · View notes

pumpkzsafeplace · 10 months

Note

ahh im so excited!! my cg and i r long distance (we’re a couple as well!!) and he’s coming 2 visit me in about a week !!!! im gonna make him smthn very special to take back home with him to comfort him when his family is being terrible, bcs even tho hes a cg i understand he needs love and comfort too, and i want smthn to help him when we cant b on the phone!!! he means the whole world to me :> also, is the 🎞️ emote taken for anons? if not i’d like to use it please!! :D anyways i got super excited and felt the need to share ajhfwifhajhx have a good day!!!

─•~❉᯽❉~•─

hihi lil bug’ 🌼

ahhhh- honestly this was super cute to read! <3

i hope you and your cg have so so so much fun! and i hope he also enjoys his present! i'm so proud of you for being so thoughtful to make him a special gift! <3

also yes, i'll add it to the list now! welcome aboard, teheh <3.

& thank you so much for telling me and letting me be involved! it's so incredibly cute! <3.

big big big big hugs from me!<3.

-🍰

#askpumpkin #🎞️askpumpkin #agere community #sfw agere #safe agere #age regression #agere blog #sfw little blog #sfw little post #sfw age regression #agere little #sfw little community

7 notes · View notes

sofargoneao3 · 6 months

Note

“Oh, that’s wonderful, I was hoping we could do that this year but… well, we’ll take Harry next year,” Lily smiled, and gave Peter a squeeze on the shoulder.

“Yeah,” Said Peter vaguely, “Next year.”—- Last Christmas

☹️

….. ahem……… Good Morning, Miss. SoFarGone….

I, um wanted to ask what inspired you to write those lines? Because it was like a punch to the gut. It sent chills down my spine and it’s crazy how well you wrote Peter and Lily’s characterization (of course J/S/R as well). I feel as not many people realize how each Marauder is talented/intelligent in their own way, and Peter became very to put it nicely a manipulative, like he wanted to prove he’ll have his name remembered because he felt like nobody understood him,

however I always felt as though Lily and James treated him like a baby brother, in a way. Even the way you wrote Lily talking to Peter it seems like she has a soft spot for him, like she understands how he feels like the outsider of the group (since she’s a muggleborn), it’s possible right? The group dynamic is fascinating and you really brought out the qualities of each character in this piece of writing.

Yet, it boggles my mind how Peter could still be “friends” with them and spend time, when his interests and intentions are becoming dark rather quickly.

Thank you for sharing this story and I hope you have a grand day 😊

Hi @nena-96!

I find it so crazy that Peter betrayed them for a year and still went to events like Harry’s birthday party… I cannot imagine being around a little baby boy who you knew you were aiding to kill and maintaining a friendship with the parents (but obviously he had to so he could gain info).

That moment specially is about Lily’s hope (that the war will be won and they’ll be able to be normal) vs Peter’s hope (that Harry will be killed and Peter will have saved his own ass)

Edit: also I just wanted to include Lily comforting Peter to really emphasize how self serving he is compared to how selfless Lily is

I definitely do not think Lily (or James, to an extent) would let themselves believe that they or Harry would die. They probably thought that in hiding they would be safe and expected the war to be won very soon. James especially was struggling with being in hiding and I know if it was me I would be thinking about all the fun things we could do once it all ended like planning their futures as a family :(

Peter definitely looked up to James a lot, I think once they’d started dating Peter probably began to really look up to Lily as well, or at least their relationship. Peter was probably quite jealous of James and Sirius, an undercurrent of long term resentment could absolutely help himself justify his actions.

The dynamic of managing to put Sirius and Remus against each other, and somehow managing to distance Remus enough for him to not be notified of the change is so interesting to me! Definitely something I want to explore in the future!

#this ask made me realize I don’t have my name on here lmfao #it’s Em!#I might write something Peter centric soon ………….#ask #I hope this answered your question hahahaha

3 notes · View notes

laxmiree · 2 years

Text

[CN] MLQC Lucien’s Rumors & Secrets – Season 2: What the Eyes See (所见之眼)

⚠️ SPOILER ALERT!! ⚠️

This post contains a detailed spoiler for an R&S that has not been released in EN yet! Feel free to notify me if there are any mistakes in the translation.

This R&S accompanied S2 Chapter 19-21 Karma

The girl's work is usually very busy, and on weekends there is often no record of her access to apartement at all, it is estimated that she stayed at home all day, and on those days, it is likely that the take-out she ordered will be for two people.

Sometimes the courier will ask the girl's floor number, but the number in the adress is Lucien's apartment, it is guessed that the girl gave Lucien some small gifts again…

-One of Hades’s spy; Black Swan “eyes”

[Translation under the cut~]

For easier differentation, what Lucien said will be in italic.

[Chapter 1]

(T/N: This part happens 4 years before the Main Story start, just after Lucien left B.S. and The New Year Change Incidents.)

A large organization needs many "eyes", and I am one of them. In Black Swan, an organization where everyone wants to make a name for themselves, I may seem rather invisible, but without countless pairs of "eyes" like me, the organization wouldn’t be able to move forward.

I was brought into the organization by Hades, and my job was simple: to spy for Hades on the people he thought he needed to monitor - I just needed to "watch" from a distance, and then report regularly on the target's movements, and didn't need to do anything else superfluous. Simple, but not easy, because in the "blink of an eye" you can miss critical information, causing irreparable damage.

“When do you plan to leave?”

“When the year is over."

On the third day of the first month, I had a meeting with another colleague who also played the role of "eyes" - he will soon be sent to the field to start a new mission.

My colleague stuffed the last piece of shrimp skewer into his mouth while calling out to the waiter for the bill, "What about you, still on vacation? Didn't Hades give you a new job?"

"It's going to be busy at the top. These Evolvers will be so busy in a few months." I smiled, "The biggest event in the world is the New Year, so let's wait until the year is over."

After we had finished eating and drinking, I walked out of the store with him. He didn't say goodbye immediately, but lit a cigarette and continued the topic just now: "But I sympathize for the days that will follow you, Loveland City should have been busy in the past few years."

I borrowed a light from him, "Why didn't I know there would be work to do later?"

The other party said: “You'll know if you see it for yourself”

I followed his gaze to the end of the long street. It had only been three days since that night, and the city had not yet recovered from the trauma; even the red lanterns on the street were skewed; snow had fallen on the signboards, and the slogan "Happy New Year" had been turned into "Unlucky New Year"; pedestrians were walking in twos and threes on the road, but the Special Task Force still didn't let down its guard, and there were undercover officers - "eyes" like us - at every gate. -At each gate, the undercover agents approach quietly, and then leave silently after confirming that there is no danger.

The acting was so bad that I commented on it in my mind.

"It's okay," I said, unimpressed by the sight before me, "What happened that night on New Year's Eve was a big deal for Special Task Force side. For us, it's just a little diversion that doesn't affect the organization."

"Is it really true that it can't affect the organization?" My colleague asked rhetorically, "Did you know that Ares, whom you respected most, has left B.S.?"

The short cigarette burned my hand and I hastily dropped it.

"Looks like you've really been on vacation for too long," my colleague smiled with glee and shoved the remaining half pack of cigarettes into my pocket, "Just wait, Hades will probably have a job to assign to you soon."

[Chapter 2]

(T/N: This part happens before Lucien left B.S.)

When I finished my third cigarette on the balcony, there was finally some movement across the street.

The first person to walk out of the gate was Hades, the hideous birthmark on his face was stained with a few blood stains, but his expression was very relaxed, it seems that the task was completed quite successfully, and behind him there was Ares.

I had just joined the organization and had only heard of him in the casual conversation of the "eyes". From their frightened tone, I had expected Ares to be a cold and arrogant genius with sinister features who looked at people through his nose, but the man appeared to my eyes as a tall, gentle-looking scholar.

"I don't see the point of all your so-called calculations," Hades's smug laugh was heard over my earphones: "Do it like what I’m doing just now, and we would have wiped out all these bugs sooner."

“I don't think you can catch everything in one net.”

This was the first time I heard Ares's voice, like an undercurrent of ice.

"Didn't I just do that?" Hades made a gesture of wiping his neck, while Ares obviously did not want to pay attention to this cheap provocation and turned his head. I followed his gaze, and suddenly I saw a figure flashing around the corner, and with a heartbeat I blurted out, "Nine o'clock! Hades!"

A gunshot was fired faster than my voice, and the figure fell down.

Everyone didn't react and froze in place, save Lucien who gracefully put away his gun as if he had expected someone to appear there, he even showed Hades a smile that was not disrespectful but carried a light sneer: "It seems that your way of ‘doing it´ still leaves a few leeway."

Hades’s face flushed furiously.

Ares turned around and left. When he was about to pass my building, he suddenly glanced upward, I was caught off guard and met his gaze. It was just a glance from so far away, and I was wearing a mask and sunglasses, but it was like another invisible bullet had been fired through my throat.

With just this one glance, I was completely convinced that every rumour about this man in the organization is true.

And what happens if this person betrays the organization?

Soon, the news that Ares had left B.S. to join Special Task Force spread through the organization, with shouts of disbelief, scorn and anger, and, more than anything, a hidden excitement, as if anticipating when the organization would order the elimination of the former God of War - people are always happy to see a gap between the higher-ups, as a proof that these leaders, these "gods" who take the code name of gods, are just a group of people.

On the fourth day of the Chinese New Year, the day after I said goodbye to my colleague, I was unexpectedly called by Hades to the B.S. building. He stood in front of the floor-to-ceiling window, looking down at the stream of people: "What do you think of Ares?"

I stood three steps away from him and carefully considered my words, "I haven't come into contact with him, I've just heard from others that this man is very intelligent and powerful."

"Intelligent and powerful…" Hades followed the two words, "Indeed, there are very few people who can be as intelligent and powerful as he is, and if he does choose another camp, he is a threat to me. "

"You're not expecting me to finish Ares off, are you?" I asked.

"Are you even worth of it?" Hades didn't even hear my half-joking tone, and even snorted, "I'm asking you to spy on him."

Sure enough, a command that fit with Hades' style. I clenched my fingers and lowered my head, "I think Ares will be able to spot me."

If he was able to hit even a fleeting shadow with a single shot, there was no way he couldn't spot a pair of hidden eyes.

"Of course, he will find you, and that’s exactly what I want," Hades's tone was confident, "This will be the best time for me to reach a partnership with Ares, you will act as a warning and a signal from me, I hope he will be sensible, otherwise, this will also be the best time to get rid of Ares… no, the best time to get rid of Lucien."

I was silent for a moment, "When will I have to start spying on him?"

"Starting right now."

[Chapter 3]

(T/N: The first half of this part happens 4 years before Main Story start, after Lucien left B.S. while the other half happens Pre-Main Story)

It's easy to spy on a person, but it's hard to spy on Lucien…

I chose many surveillance positions during the mission, from a convenience store clerk near the Special Task Force, to a teacher in training near the school, and I even worked as a delivery man at a courier post near Loveland University - one of the worst jobs, as the desire to shop online was inevitably overwhelming among this group of young people. It would often appear that when I had just struggled out of these students and courier piles, I found Lucien had long since gotten into his car and left.

Lucien's life in the surface hardly changed from how it was before, except for the fact that the STF Secret Research Department was added to the original three-point route. Sometimes I look at the route I monitored and feel a sense of boredom, I even suspect that Lucien actually found me long ago, and everything is a disguise that he made to me.

I needed a more convenient location to observe, and that opportunity arose four years later.

Lucien wanted to move to a place that was more convenient for him to go to work at both ends, so during his house hunting, I took note of every real estate agent he had dealt with and hacked into the backend of each agency's system to check the contracts. When I saw Lucien's signature on a copy of the contract for a particular apartment, I finally breathed a sigh of relief, took out my phone, and sent a message to the owner of the office: I am quitting.

-Why so sudden?

-Because I’m rushing back to my hometown to get married.

I successfully became a minor security guard in that neighbourhood. This job is simply too good compared to the last one, in addition to regular patrols every day, as long as you deal with the small matters of the apartement tenants, other time are all free, I can even play games and read online articles in between the monitoring, and the days have become easy.

A week later, the removals company also brought Lucien's household items to the neighbourhood. I opened the gate for them with an attentive smile and led the workers downstairs. Just as I was about to introduce the neighbourhood infrastructure to Lucien, his eyes abruptly passed over and landed behind me, the corners of his mouth forming an arc, "What a coincidence."

I turned around and saw a young lady. She was a little surprised to see Lucien, and then she gave him a bright and beautiful smile. Even though I'm used to seeing all kinds of people as "eyes", I have to admit that this girl's smile is very contagious and makes people want to get close at first sight.

It seems that these two people know each other. I noticed the apartment number on the girl's door card and went back to the security room to find out her name: MC. She lives right next door to Lucien.

I found out more about Miss MC on the Internet, very young, and talented, and just as soon as she graduated, she became a boss, admittedly with the help of her father's name, but was able to turn an originally small film and television company into the leading media in the Loveland City, which is not something that can be done with the ordinary people’s vigour. I looked with interest at the programs she had recently produced and saw Lucien's name at the end of a program that had just aired.

He's the consultant of the program.

So, is this where the intersection of MC and Lucien comes from? The next time I reported to Hades, I also presented the matter of Miss MC: "...his recent life is still very regular. The time he went to the STF was the same as usual, but because he had to clean up his new home, he stayed at his place for three hours longer, and coincidentally, a woman named MC lived across him, and they had a certain business partnership."

"A business partnership? I would say that they have more than a business partnership."

The moment he heard MC's name, I saw the corners of Hades' eyes twitch twice, and his face went dark, saying coldly, "I was wondering why Ares went through the trouble of moving. So, it was for this 'famous' Miss Nox."

[Chapter 4]

(T/N: This part happens Pre-Main Story)

Nox, the unpredictable and rebellious member of the organization?

I froze for a moment, somewhat unable to connect the rumor with the bright smile I remembered. I asked a cautious question, "Is she the second set of 'eyes' sent by the organization?"

" There's no one in B.S. that can hire her," Hades snorted, "You don't have to worry about her, just keep an eye on Lucien."

"Okay."

"Is there anything else to report, such as whether he has released any signals of communication to you?"

"No."

Hades was disappointed, and I didn't dismiss it. I couldn't help but glance at Hades again as I excused myself - my professional habits lead me to watch carefully every move of anyone I talk to, and my boss spoke three times faster when talking about MC, with his fingers unconsciously tightened. His hostility towards this Nox was too obvious, as if the presence of this girl would make his otherwise self-proclaimed perfect plan become less smooth.

I recalled Lucien's expression when he saw Nox. Although he hid it very well, the subtle fleeting change in the corners of his eyes and the tips of his eyebrows under the afternoon sun is an instinct that no one can control.

It turns out that someone as perfect as Lucien will also have an instinctive reaction, and it turns out that he too has someone he cares about.

I suddenly also became interested in Nox, I’m certain that this girl is like a stone thrown into the calm lake, adding new elements to the fuel of absolute balance, so that everything will develop in a more interesting direction.

Anyway, they both live in the same building, so I can have as much time as I want to observe them.

Lucien will go to work a little earlier than Nox, and Nox will leave work a little later than Lucien, and occasionally the two will go out or go home at the same time.

The girl seemed to have a good relationship with everyone, for example, when she saw me, she would always say "good morning" and "good job" to me.

Sometimes the courier will ask the girl's floor number, but the number in the adress is Lucien's apartment, it is guessed that the girl gave Lucien some small gifts again…

All kinds of details of life hidden beneath the undercurrents, only my eyes hidden in the corner were recording and observing silently, making my otherwise tedious observations finally become less tedious. And I didn’t report these things to Hades, after all, he only let me observe Lucien, didn't he.

A short honking sounded, and I hastily looked up from my mobile game, maintaining a panic of being caught red-handed at work, quickly raised the lever and greeted the person in the car, "Good morning, Professor Lucien, are you going to work overtime at the Research Centre on the weekend?"

"Morning." The man in the driver's seat smiled at me, "There's a Flower Market in the suburbs today, I want go over there and have a look around."

"Well, have fun then!"

As his car slowly drove past me, I saw Nox sitting in the passenger seat.

[Chapter 5]

(T/N: This part happens in S2 Chapter 13)

I stood not too far away from the alley, with my hat covering half of my face, and used my eyes to look at the alley ahead. My boss, on the other hand, was holding his arms in the alley, and every now and then his impatient stammering voice would come through my earphones.

I subconsciously pulled my hat down a bit more.

This meeting was supposed to be quiet, no extra "eyes" should be watching, even Hades didn't know I was standing here at the moment, I decided to go out of curiosity. I wanted to confirm something I was still hesitating about, so I had to see it with my eyes and hear it with my ears.

It didn't take long for another guest to finally arrive.

"You're late, Ares."

Hades's tone was somewhat dissatisfied, he paused for a moment and then changed his tone to a sneer, "No, you' re already a traitor to B.S., now I should call you 'Professor Lucien'."

Lucien still didn't respond to his taunts, "Where's the stuff."

In the dim alley, I saw Hades hand a small metal block to Lucien, and if I'm not mistaken, it appeared to be an USB flash drive.

"I can't believe that you are quite attached to the 'little syringe'. Although you left B.S., but in this issue, it's the same as those old men who has the same idea. Why, looking at your expression, you don't suspect that this substance is related to us, right?"

Perhaps Lucien’s attitude, who just wants to take the goods and leave, makes Hades more and more irritated, and he starts to provoke the other side again, my ears are full of his incessant shouting, I inexplicably sighed and couldn't help but take the earphones three centimetres away.

I also feel that this boss of mine is sometimes really childish in his thinking - if he had been observing Lucien for so many years as I have, he certainly would not have used that corny line to scream at the other party.

Can't he see that Professor Lucien already had his own ideas from four years ago?

"You are the only opponent I will acknowledge. Let's work together to create a superior world."

"That's just your idea."

After another invitation from Hades, Lucien finally opened his mouth, his voice was still the same as when I first heard it, like an icy edge in the undercurrent, but I had clearly heard his voice when he talked to Nox, and the cold at this moment was the exact opposite of that time, when it’s like the fresh grass in early spring.

"Also, you are over-estimating what you can do."

Lucien came out of the alley, the thick night colour dyed in his windbreaker, his every steps sounded like a hunter. He came to my direction, I immediately turned my back, pretend to make a phone call. Lucien's voice came from behind: "I have a delivery tomorrow, I may have to trouble you to sign for it."

My back stiffened, understanding that he had recognized me, and I stopped avoiding him, "Sure, what's the delivery?"

"There is no need to be so nervous." Lucien smiled at me, "It's not a significant delivery, the flowers in my neighbour’s house have withered again, so I just bought a pot for her."

I nodded in agreement: "Then do you want me to directly hand it to Miss Nox when she gets off work?" I deliberately put emphasis on the word "Nox".

"Hmm..." Lucien thought for a moment, "Let me give it to her in person."

In a few words, I think Lucien already understood what I meant. As for me… after this night, I probably want to start considering whether to find a "part-time job" for myself.

#that ares part *barks*#WHY NO ONE TOLD ME THEY WENT TO DATES EVERY WEEKEND #mlqc lucien #mr love queen's choice #mlqc translation #mlqc spoiler #mlqc cn #mr. love queen's choice

30 notes · View notes

scarlet-ancunin · 1 year

Note

Ok so let me know if you need more requests for Ian or Desire or Gren cuz I have a few but this one is for our dear Doctor, this might be a bit angsty um Ian and Reader were once together but broke up due to a long distance relationship and work. however Reader has moved back and runs into Ian which leads to feelings returning on both parts. R wants to start over and return to how they use to be but isn't sure if Ian wants the same thing.

I'll leave the ending to you friend!

Ok that's it I'll leave now

MKay BTW HAPPY NEW YEARS EVERYONE AND REQUESTS ARE OPEN

°•○°•○°•○°•○°•○°•○°•○°•○°•○°•○°•○°•○°•○

Long Distance Dispute

It was another year they were together with you and today marked the day You both would have been together for three years if you both were together.

Ian remembers why the argument happened. it was because of how much you had to work and how much work you had to do away from home they tried to make it work but you didn't want to leave your job as it was at least good pay and it was your title.

it closed with you saying you were sorry and Ian saying sorry as well but ended it there. to say the least, it was a very rough patch for them both.

it came as a shock when Ian was in the coffee shop and bumps right into you rushing over. "I-Ian I saw you and I wanted to say hello," you said softly looking at them then down your heart beating rapidly and you were nervous.

Ian was shocked seeing you and their own heart was beating fast. "i-i'm happy to see you, um.. how have you been" they said as they walked towards work and you followed "I'm living here again and staying for good. I.... I got a new position and told them I like to remain in this branch" you spoke softly looking down.

Ian nods sipping their to-go cup and looking away "I'm glad you hear y/n" with that they quickly left their facility. once fully inside they held their chest and closed their eyes taking shaky breaths. once you were home you closed your eyes and mumble their name sniffing.

Ever since then you and Ian have been spending time together once again and getting to know each other once more and even had fun doing silly things they used to do together before they broke up. it was a good time and they did so much together within the three months period Ian and you were sitting on a balcony having dinner together. and you suddenly asked the question.

"Ian...i know things haven't ended perfectly between us but I want to try again and go to the way we use to be I missed it so much and i love you so much.. please will you give me another chance?"

Good Ending:

Ian was unsure looking away for a moment because what if it doesn't work out again or what if they didn't like something about them anymore. But Ian truly loved you and seeing as you wanted them to Ian took your hand in theirs "I would love to try again y/n.. please"

with that, you both shared a kiss. blushing Ian leans their head against your own and smiles brightly "T-thank you Ian i love you so much and missed you so much." Ian nods "i missed you so much to love" You both walked off the balcony holding hands "lets make up for lost time." they both said softly.

Bad Ending:

Ian avoided making eye contact worried that their heart cannot take you being with them just to leave one day just like last time. they had enjoyed their time together with you but all the bad times flooded back in and they looked down "I'm sorry y/n...but I can't be with you....maybe you will find someone who is very special but I don't think I can be that person again"

you felt their pain and ache and you felt it too. both of you shedding silent tears Ian got up "I'm s-sorry I have to go" they walked off Quickly a soft sniff can be heard before the door shuts. you closed your eyes letting the tears come freely "I'm sorry love.."

°•○°•○°•○°•○°•○°•○°•○°•○°•○°•○°•○°•○°•○

Taglist: @justaproudslytherpuff , @sherazyjade , @adryanscott , @sugakookieswithacupoftae16 , @happilydangerousworld , @harlekin6 , @supermegapauselouca

#unhinged desire simp #quantum leap #quantum leap 2022 #quantum leap ian wright headcanon #dr ian wright #ian wright #ian wright headcanon #quantum leap ian wright x reader #dr ian wright x reader #ian wright x reader #ian wright x you #ian wright x y/n #thank you #thanks for the support

18 notes · View notes

vanishedangels · 1 year

Text

Castles on the sand

Blame it on the storm Sequel

Summary: After the storm that brought them together ended, rebel pilot Luke Skywalker and bounty hunter Din Djarin started a long-distance relationship. It gets more and more complicated when they realize they're developing deep feelings for each other.

Pairing: Din Djarin/Luke Skywalker

Characters: Luke Skywalker, Din Djarin, Leia Organa, Han Solo, Wedge Antilles, Xi'an (Star Wars), R2-D2, Paz Vizsla.

Rating: Mature (+18)

Tags: Canon Divergence (AU), Long-distance Relationship, Post A New Hope (Star Wars), Fluff and Angst, Protective Din Djarin, Tumblr Prompts.

Chapters: 2/3

Navigation: <- Previous Chapter • Next Chapter ->

Part 2 of Wonderwall series

Excerpt:

"I wish you can stay a little longer." He absentmindedly said.

"You know I can't." Din answered soothing his hand on his back. "Maybe we can meet somewhere else next month."

Luke hummed.

"Since it's my birthday." Din casually added, making Luke sit up swiftly on the floor.

"What?" He was blushing sightly, realizing that he didn't know Din's birth date.

"Or maybe not." The mandalorian stated and he sounded a little disappointed.

Chapter 2: Without labels doesn't mean no strings attached

The Razor Crest was slowly holding a special place in Luke's heart, his blue eyes were roaming the ceiling while he was resting his head on Din's chest plate. He moved, slowly, to push up onto his elbow, Din's visor followed his moves, until it was fixed on Luke's face.

"Din?" He asked leaning his head on his knuckles.

Din hummed.

"Nothing." He shrugged looking down with a frown on his face.

"Luke, I know what's on your mind." He sighed "Ask me about her."

Damn! Din was always a step ahead of Luke, in some ways, he reminded him of Leia, they were both very smart and their intuitive understanding of Luke's feelings made him so vulnerable around them.

The blonde nodded pressing his lips together "Did you have a relationship with the twi'lek, Din?" He asked under his breath, afraid of Din's answer but he needed to know, desperately.

"Yes."

Luke's heart sank and he swallowed around the lump in his throat.

"But it was years ago. It's in the past now, Luke." Din added tilting his head like if he was trying to ease Luke's visible discomfort.

"How did you two meet?" He tried to sound not affected at all but he was hating the woman a little more, he didn't know it could be possible until Din's confirmation.

"Twi'lek healing baths."

Luke's eyes widened pulling back a little and Din propped himself up on his elbows "It's not what you think." He said leaning in close to Luke "I was there for a job, she helped me localize the target, then she introduced me to her brother and we kinda started working together. I did things, uh, jobs that you will find questionable."

Luke's stomach turned, again, this was a part of Din's life that he wanted to ignore but he needed to love every aspect of him. Love? That word again. He bored into Din's visor and put a brave face on it, trying to ignore that Din had a troubled past that he didn't know about "What happened to her brother?"

Din shrugged "I left him behind and saved my skin. We were involved in pretty bad things but I drew the line when he started hurting innocent people only because he could. I wanted to stop him, so I did it."

The air returned to Luke's lungs, he was now feeling relieved, he always thought that Din was indeed a man with a kind heart, the fact that he put an end to the twi'lek's cruelty only reinforced the good concept he already had of Din. Or maybe he was just idealizing him.

"What about you, cyar'ika?" Din asked him stroking his cheek "Have you been in a relationship before?"

Before. That word coming from Din's lips made Luke's heart run fast, even when Din asked him not to label whatever was going on between them he used the word relationship to refer to them indirectly. His eyes glistened, a shy smile appearing on his face.

"No, never." He licked his bottom lip and Din ran his thumb over it afterwards making him sigh out of delight "I had crushes on people though." Din nodded encouraging him to keep talking about it. "Biggs. He was my best friend when I was growing up on Tatooine." He didn't look away from Din trying to find any sign of distress, deep down he was aching for any display of jealousy and possessiveness coming from Din, but the mandalorian didn't make a move and didn't say a word, he kept cupping Luke's face tenderly. "And, uh, Leia..." He added and Din withdrew his hand from him.

"Organa?" He asked in a high-pitched tone making Luke startle.

"Yes!" Luke answered defensively with a scowl on his face "What's wrong with that?"

"Nothing it's just-" Din chuckled "I don't know, when I saw you together, the day I met you, you two gave me these siblings vibes." He laughed softly behind his helmet "I'm sorry, but that's what I felt." He soothed his hand on Luke's arm.

Luke frowned "That's weird, siblings?"

Din nodded "Now that you mention Organa, how much longer we have, mesh'la?"

Their time together was coming to and end again and Luke's heart was breaking in two "A couple of hours." He sighed.

"What do you want to do?"

Luke's eyes traveled him from helmet to boots, he smiled thinking that Din looked always breathtaking lying next to him, even with all that beskar on him. Then the idea of running his hands all over Din's naked chest popped into his mind "Kiss me?"

Din groaned.

"But first..." He said as his trembling fingers found Din's chest plate unfastening the straps and Din clutched his hands, Luke looked up at his visor as confusion crossed his features.

"No." The mandalorian uttered "Please don't, cyar'ika."

"No?" Luke asked under his breath.

"No sweetheart, I can't." He answered caressing his knuckles.

Luke sighed deeply, feeling stupid and thoughtless "Your creed, right, I'm sorry." He apologized but he couldn't help feeling rejected.

"No, it's not that." Din moved to hover over him, his knees at both sides of Luke's hips, leaning himself on his hands, staring at Luke's eyes "Putting these on again will take a lot of time, if something happened, if someone broke into my ship, well, it's a risk I won't take, it's different when it comes to the helmet, I can put it back on in a second and I'm ready to protect you, cyar'ika. I won't put you in danger, not even when I'm dying to feel you against me."

"Din..." Luke sighed as a flutter of electricity ran all over his body, he stroked his man's arms choking with emotion, he tried to control himself, since the idea of Din putting him before his own needs was overwhelming and enticing. "I can protect myself, you know?" He managed to say avoiding the real subject, was Din telling him that he loved him between the lines?

Din hummed "Yeah, but beskar deflects blaster shots better than flesh, Luke." He laughed. Oh his laugh, Luke was taken aback by Din's beautiful, alluring, deep voice, and hearing him happy was something else entirely.

I think I love you too.

With every encounter Luke became more fond of wearing their blindfold, he loved the way it intensified his other sensations, heightening the experience of giving himself to Din. He was breathing heavily listening to the beat of his own heart, so clear and overwhelming as Din was unbuttoning his black shirt, he sighed feeling how the mandalorian brushed his fingers against his shoulders, exposing the skin burning under his touch. The lips of his man on his chest while he was finally peeling off the shirt, Luke was digging his fingers into Din's scalp, stroking his curls, gently bringing him close to his face, breathing deeply, he smiled, he could smell Din's skin, spicy and warm, as his mouth found his neck, pressing open-mouthed kisses, trembling beneath his lover's body. Two hours, two hours to live a thousand lives, two hours to love Din without restriction.

Luke's mouth fell open as he was feeling Din's lips around him, his lover head's between his thighs, the patched beard chafing the skin of his inner thighs deliciously, his fingers finding Din's hair, twisting and pulling a little. The mandalorian's name falling from his lips when the vision of Din emerged through the purple haze catching him off guard. Luke frowned as his hand tensed up against Din's hair, he thought that the visions had stopped, he never suspected that not only they would return but also clearer and more complete than ever.

"Fuck!" He exclaimed slapping his hand over his mouth, covering it completely. The vision was definitely spellbinding. He could see Din's arms wrapped around his legs, then the vision vanished.

He felt Din's lips retreating from him then he heard him clearing his throat.

"What is it cyar'ika? Should I stop?" His hoarse voice and his hand, curled around his thigh, squeezing a little, making Luke shudder.

Then the vision popped into his mind again, Din's brown eyes boring into his soul, his dark hair plastered to his forehead, with his bottom lip glistening, the skin of his arms and shoulders glowing in sweat and Luke was repeating to himself as a mantra You can't control this is, Luke. You can't control this. You're not breaking his creed.

Luke swallowed, drawing his hands down to caress Din's shoulders only to feel the hard beskar of his pauldrons under his hands, still in his mental image he saw the way Din's bare upper body reacted to his touch, his muscles flexing and relaxing under the soft tanned skin, so inviting, and Luke couldn't help but give himself to the tingling warmth building in his lower belly. He withdrew his hands from Din slowly.

Although he had no control over the force, he was certain that his desire to feel Din's skin against his own was triggering the visions.

"No." The blonde said out of breath "Don't stop Din, please." He ran his hands through his own hair now, overwhelmed and even with his eyes shut behind the blindfold he could still see the image of his lover, the way a lopsided grin crossed his face before bowing his head as his mouth returned to Luke.

"Din..." He moaned, shamelessly basking in everything his man was giving him.

After he returned to Hoth, Luke was feeling more relaxed and easygoing, he was spending more time with his mates again, just the way he used to before meeting Din.

"Did he dump you, Luke?" Brando asked from the other side of the table, he nodded laughing.

The blonde took a sip of his spotchka, then put the glass down, licking his lips, smiling "You wish, Brando." He retorted making the rest of the pilots laugh.

Killian slapped Brando's shoulder mockingly.

"Yeah, yeah, right." Brando grunted "Have you even seen his face?"

Silence.

Luke looked around.

"Oh, man, that sucks. I heard that he's a weird mandalorian, the kind of mandalorian that can't take off his helmet ever. I thought they were a myth, children's stories." He chuckled.

Luke pressed his lips together, shaking his head "Why do you ask? Are you trying to get one for your own?"

"He got you, Brando!" Wedge exclaimed, the complete squad bursting with laughter.

Brando narrowed his eyes tilting his head, arms crossed over his chest "Yeah, laugh, but think about this, what if the day comes and you're kissing him for the first time and he's not only terrible kisser, but also he can't make you feel a thing."

If only Brando knew. Luke looked down thinking that he wouldn't say a word about the big concession Din made by allowing Luke to kiss him, therefore he remained silent. "I'll tell you what-" He finally said "If that happens I would definitely give you a chance." He mocked "Till then, I'm still out of limits for you." He chuckled.

Brando nodded, raising his glass at him "That hurts, Skywalker, but thank you anyway."

Luke breathed in and out relieved, satisfied, knowing that he could manage Brando's advances now, without Din's help, he smiled thinking that Din would be so proud of him.

When he was walking towards the showers he put his hand in his pocket to pull out his com and realized its light was flickering.

"Shit." He muttered looking around. He was alone, so he considered that it was safe to play the message, he was sure it was Din's.

"Cyar'ika, I'm traveling now, please, com me when you get this."

Luke's eyes widened, he ran to the hangar, dodging people in his way.

"Watch out, kid!" He heard Han yelling but he didn't stop, his heart was in his throat, he was blinking back tears. This was the first time Din asked him to com him, Din was definitely in danger, a sharp sense of dread invading his whole being.

He climbed into his X-Wing and closed the transparisteel canopy, his breath coming uneven as he hit Din's comlink.

Please, Din. Please, Din. Please, Din.

Din answered.

"Luke?"

"Din?"

Silence.

The blonde leaned forward clutching his com device "Are you alright? Are you hurt? Where are you?" He could feel a fat drop of cold sweat running down his back.

"I'm, ah, I'm alright."

"What happened?"

Din hummed "I just wanted to talk to you."

Luke frowned "Why?" He sputtered still thinking that something terrible was happening to Din, maybe someone captured him and now a knife was pointing at his throat while they were talking, maybe some imps got him.

"I'm sorry, if this is not a good time-"

"Wait." Luke cut him off, he scratched the back of his head with his free hand "What? So you are okay?"

"Well... Yes."

Realization hit Luke hard "And you wanted to talk with me..." He said under his breath feeling a little stupid as a goofy smile appeared on his face.

"Yes." Din insisted.

Luke leaned back in the seat not believing his luck "Hi Din." He chuckled.

"Hi cyar'ika."

He wouldn't miss the chance "So you commed me because you were missing me or-"

Din chuckled deliciously "Right." He said making Luke sigh. "You're gonna love this, I dreamt about you, Luke. It was a little weird though."

"Really?" He arched one eyebrow "Tell me about it, Din."

"We were in the Hoth base, you were sitting on my lap, we were sitting across from your squad mates at that large table. You were wearing that black shirt and those brown pants you wore when we met on Nevarro the last time."

Din was killing him.

"From one moment to the next I wasn't wearing my chest plate somehow, and I unzipped the upper part of my flight suit, then I untucked your shirt from your pants, exposing your small back a little, carefully, so nobody around us could notice. Then I brought you close to me, pressing our bodies together, skin-to-skin. You were sighing with every move of my chest and I was groaning as your warmth drove me crazy. The thing is the guys around us kept talking not even realizing we were starting our foreplay, that had me going so badly. That's all I remember."

Luke's eyes were fixed on the com device, he was gaping, utterly dumbfounded.

"Luke? Are you there?" Din waited patiently for his answer.

"I think I need a moment, Din."

The escapades were surely exhilarating, but nothing compared to what Din coming back to Hoth made Luke feel. Every time Leia hired Din, Luke pretended that his man was coming home. Hoth, where everything started.

As many times before, Din was sitting on the floor of the Razor Crest leaning his back against the wall. Luke was sitting cross-legged beside him.

"Luke, I brought you something." The mandalorian said resting his forearm on his knee.

"Power converters?" Luke narrowed his eyes smiling "I mean, since you promised that like ten months ago." He chuckled.

"I said that maybe I could bring some power converters, that's not a promise, Luke." He sighed.

"I know." He said shrugging one shoulder "I know you keep your promises. I was joking."

The mandalorian nodded reaching a hand behind himself, pulling a vibro-knife from his utility belt, Luke frowned smiling.

"Din, is this a vibro-knife?" Luke beamed taking the blade from Din's gloved hand.

"Yeah, I hope you like it."

"Thank you, Din! I love it! Was this yours? Please don't tell me you spent a lot of credits on this." Although Luke didn't want to sound as if he was rebuffing his gift, he knew how hard Din worked in order to provide to his tribe.

"Wasn't mine. My tribe leader forged it. I asked her to forge it for you." He shrugged "Is not beskar though, but it can cut a droid in half."

Luke's heart skipped a beat as he was staring at Din astonished "Your tribe leader? For me?" He was babbling.

"Yeah, I didn't tell her it was for you, she only knew it was a gift, she didn't need to know." Din said as he rose to his feet "Come on Luke, I'm gonna show you some moves." He insisted tilting his head. Luke craned his neck to look at Din, his blue eyes glistening.

Din was a strict trainer, Luke was peeling off his waistcoat as he started sweating exhausted, but he was totally committed to the task, learning how to use his new blade properly.

"Remember, your hand firm and away from your body." The mandalorian said standing beside him. "This is not a blaster, this is a close range weapon, your body and your mind need to understand that."

"Like this?" Luke asked focused on his stance and the way he was wielding the blade.

Din nodded with his visor on Luke's outstretched arm, hands on his own hips "Good lunge." He encouraged Luke making him smile.

That evening Luke was curling up on their blankets facing Din, resting his head on the mandalorian's arm. Eyes half lidded, he yawned stroking Din's chest plate.

"I wish you can stay a little longer." He absentmindedly said.

"You know I can't." Din answered soothing his hand on his back. "Maybe we can meet somewhere else next month."

Luke hummed.

"Since it's my birthday." Din casually added, making Luke sit up swiftly on the floor.

"What?" He was blushing sightly, realizing that he didn't know Din's birth date.

"Or maybe not." The mandalorian stated and he sounded a little disappointed.

Luke licked his lips, crossing his legs, shifting a little to look at Din's face "No, no, I mean, I didn't know it was your birthday. I'm such a mess, kriff, I never asked you about it, oh, Din." He was feeling guilty.

"Don't worry cyar'ika, now that I think about it I don't know yours either."

"But I should have known that, that's something a bo-" He trailed off blinking. That's something a boyfriend should know, he nibbled on his bottom lip, looking at Din through his eyelashes, hoping he would overlook what he almost said. He closed his eyes when Din caressed his cheek softly.

"Well, are you coming next month?" Din asked and the blonde sighed relieved, luckily he missed the way he trailed off, or maybe he was making both a favour by not saying a word about Luke's slip.

Luke leaned into his touch "I wouldn't miss it for the world." He kissed the hill of Din's hand, lips curling up into a smile "Nevarro?"

"No, a better place this time." He said making Luke look at him and raise his eyebrows "Some place that would make your black shirt and brown pants justice." He chuckled and Luke shook his head slowly, with a knowing smile on his face.

The days between Din's last visit to Hoth and Luke's next escapade found the blonde traveling through the galaxy alongside his good friend Wedge. He returned to the rebel base a cicle earlier. When his X-Wing entered the hangar he spotted Leia by the Millennium Falcon, by the time he jumped off his ship he cast a glance at her, the princess was staring at him, arms crossed over her chest, with a scowl on her face. He started closing the distance between them.

"Where's Antilles?" She asked arching her eyebrows.

That was a fair question, Luke didn't want to worry her therefore he answered as fast as he could "He's totally fine! He's just patrolling the end section of our route." He forced a smile at her.

"And why are you here and not with him, Luke?" She tilted her head, her eyes on the X-Wing "Is your ship damaged?"

Embarrassment was taking Luke over "It's, um, it's not that, I needed to come back earlier." He could notice the way impatience crossed his friend's features "I'm meeting Din, it's his birthday."

His words made Leia's eyes widen, her lips parted, she looked astonished and Luke needed to look down in order to avoid her gaze "And you left your partner alone? Gods, Luke! I understand that this is important to you but we're risking our necks here, how could you leave him alone?"

She was right. Was Luke being selfish and reckless? Since Din came to his life his priorities had changed and, what for? Even when he was sure about his feelings about Din he only kept finding that he was dancing to the mandalorian's rhythm. He thought back to Din's words over the last year.

"Don't label this, it wasn't fake then and it's not real now, and you know that."

"My people are waiting for these credits, they depend on me to survive, Luke."

"We should take one step at a time."

Was Luke investing in their relationship more than Din? Was Luke putting his goals and beliefs aside while Din was doing the right thing, respecting his commitment to his people? And here he was, standing before Leia, realizing that maybe he was throwing away his work, the rebel alliance's work.

"I know, I'm sorry, I put Wedge in danger. I know you're right." He said shrugging.

"I don't want to be right, I want to be wrong, Luke." Leia said shaking her head "I want Antilles to come back safe and sound." She clicked her tongue "Where are you going this time?" She asked and her expression softened.

Luke hesitated for a moment and then he thought that this was Leia, she should know about his whereabouts if something happened "Glavis Ringworld."

Leia narrowed her eyes "Weird."

Although Luke had never heard about Glavis Ringworld, he searched for information about it. It wasn't a planet nor a moon, he was surprised to learn that it was actually, a space station.

"Have you been there, Leia?"

The princess shook her head and pressed her lips together "No, but I know is just a place of transit, where you also could find entertainment." She looked at one side as Han was walking towards them with a smirk on his face "But here's the man that surely knows that place like the back of his hand." She snorted and turned around walking away as Han was shrugging staring at Luke.

"What place?" He asked Luke.

"Glavis Ringworld." The blonde said under his breath as if he was sharing a secret.

"Oh!" Han straightened his back and raised his eyebrows "Good place to do naughty things." His lips curling up.

"Naughty things?" Luke frowned.

"Yeah, there're night clubs and motels, I met some nice ladies there." He chuckled resting his hands on his hips "So, why were you guys talking about that love nest? Is Leia going there?" His face contorted.

"She's not-she's not going there." Luke sighed as his cheeks were now flushing.

"So? Who's going?" He insisted but Luke ignored his question walking towards the barracks "Hey! Kid! Who's going there? Who's gonna be pounded like there's no tomorrow? Huh?"

The elevator was taking him to the top level of the space station, just like Din specified the last time they chatted. Luke looked down straightening the cuff of his yellow jacket, his heart was pounding against his ribcage, Glavis Ringworld was something else entirely, people of different species walking up and down, just like back on Tatooine, but, unlike on Tatooine, they were having fun here, he relished in the sound of music and chattering at the distance. Luke was still dumbfounded by the sight of the space station, he couldn't wrap his head around that he was walking and standing on his own feet on an open-looped ring artificial world.

When he left the elevator he could feel all eyes on him, he kept walking avoiding their gaze, looking down and quickening his pace. He chose a table, with a booth, and sat down smiling a little thinking that Din would appreciate it.

He was enjoying his spotchka when two men approached him, his blue eyes switching between them. His lips parted slowly when he realized one of them looked like Din, but this one couldn't be Din, besides his eyes were a little different, not as kind and pure as Din's, still his forehead furrowed staring at the tall man who was now leaning forward to look straight into the blonde's eyes.

"I've been looking at you for a while now and I think you look a little lonely, mind if we join you?" The man said with a charming smile.

While the man was really good looking and interesting, Luke smiled shaking his head "Thank you but I'm waiting for someone."

"Of course you are, but we can keep you occupied till then if you want to, pretty boy." The man chuckled leaning back making Luke feel uneasy.

"I'm not interested." He retorted sipping his spotchka, he put his glass down "I told you I'm waiting for someone."

The men looked at each other and shared a nasty smile, the Din lookalike leaned his hand on the table "We're not leaving, sweetheart." He deadpanned.

"He told you he's waiting for someone." Din's voice making Luke flinch, his blue eyes sparked with happiness when he could finally see his helmet between the two men's heads.

They turned around facing Din "And who's this, pretty boy?" The man asked casting a glance at Luke over his shoulder "Your bodyguard?" He laughed.

Din didn't make a move, his visor was fixed on the man's face. Luke stood up slowly.

"Don't worry, mandalorian, we didn't touch one hair on his pretty head." He laughed tilting his head to one side and his friend followed him while they were walking away "Poor man, just imagine being in his shoes, being paid to witness how some random guy enjoys fucking that pretty little thing."

Luke could notice the way Din's chest heaved, he closed the distance between them and put his hand on his chest plate "Poor them." He said purring with a playful smile on his face, looking up at Din's visor, his face so close to his helmet "Just imagine being in their shoes and witnessing how my mandalorian dance with me all night long."

The rumble inside Din's chest came out as a chuckle that weakened Luke's knees effortlessly "What if you make out with your mandalorian as well?" Luke nodded with sincere eyes, not looking away, he shivered when he felt Din's gloved hand against the back of his head and the cold beskar against his forehead.

"Hi Din." He sighed encircling Din's waist with his arms "I missed you."

Din hummed running his fingers through his hair "I missed you more, cyar'ika."

"Happy birthday, babe." He whispered and Din's fingers stopped, Luke frowned pulling back a little not understanding what was going on "Din?"

"You called me babe?" The mandalorian asked in a low voice, making Luke swallow hard and squeeze his eyes shut.

Fuck! He overstepped.

"I-I'm, I don't know why I called you that, I'm sorry." He managed to say as he opened his eyes.

Din groaned pressing their foreheads together again "Don't be sorry, call me that. Please cyar'ika, I want to hear you saying it again, over and over."

Luke's heart fluttered, he sighed deeply "Babe." Din chuckled. "Babe." He said moving his head a little to press a kiss on his visor "Babe..." Din drew his hands down and squeezed his waist.

Happy birthday, love.

Din was staring at him while Luke was savouring a batuu-bon, his plump lips covered in white chocolate mousse while his blue eyes were glistening. He licked his upper lip clean, resting his bare forearms on the table, his shirt sleeves rolled up to his elbows, the ends of his blonde hair curling up graciously, he looked like an angel under the warmth lights. He looked at Din sideways smiling, holding a fork between his fingers "What is it, Din?" He smiled as the corner of his eyes crinkled.

The mandalorian looked around and then at him again "Look at you, Luke. Everyone is looking at you."

Luke leaned back leaving the fork on the table.

"I think I'm the lucky one here, huh?" Din added chuckling.

Luke's hand found Din's and he squeezed it gently, reassuringly "Oh, no, I'm the lucky one, Din." He said as fast as he could, Din looked down at their joined hands on the table.

Din shrugged one arm and looked at his face again "Come on, cyar'ika, since day one people think I'm your hired gun, your bodyguard." He chuckled "This is just a fluke, and no matter what, I'm okay with that."

The words coming from Din made Luke's heart sink, he caressed Din's helmet tenderly, reverently. A fluke? How could Din be so clueless, so wrong? He realized that Din was being self-conscious for the first time since they started their relationship and while he was desperate to see Din jealous, this was heart-rending. He considered telling Din how he was feeling about him but he knew that it wasn't the right time to do so, therefore he smiled and leaned in closer to him to nuzzle his neck "We're tied to each other Din, I'm not going anywhere, this is not a fluke, I choose to be with you, you're the one I need." He chuckled trying to hide the way his voice was breaking since it took all his strength not to tell him that he was falling for him, he couldn't say the word love but at least he could show him how much he wanted him.

Din tilted his head down when Luke rested his cheek on his pauldron, he hummed "Wanna dance, Skywalker?" Luke's lips curled into a smile.

They danced to the music holding each other, Din's arm on his small back as Luke was running his fingers across his shoulders and nape, Luke was sparkling, laughing graciously, spinning around smiling, the artificial light playing with his hair, making his eyes sparkle, Din encircled his waist with his arms and rested his helmeted chin on his shoulder, sending shivers down his spine "This is the first time I celebrate my birthday since I was a little kid." Din said and Luke froze. His stomach clenched as he thought back to the day Din told him about his parents' fate, knowing for sure that he hasn't celebrated his birthday in decades, presumably since he lost his parents and now, he's celebrating his birthday with me... Realization hit him as Din sighed bringing him out of his thoughts. "I'm-I'm so glad you're here, and I'm so glad you're the person I'm sharing this day with, Luke."

His heart was running faster as he kissed Din's helmet wrapping his arms around his shoulders, he couldn't help but feel that Din was telling him that he loved him for a second time "Me too, Din, me too." He sighed, yes, I love you too.

Nevarro seemed as serene as the last time he visited the planet a year earlier, he didn't know why but Din wasn't inviting him over anymore, they kept seeing each other on Hoth or any other world, but not Nevarro, not anymore. That was why he came to the conclusion that this was indeed Din's home.

He commed Wedge "Changed your clothes, is not safe walking around in our flight suits." He shed his suit carefully inside the small cockpit of his X-Wing and put some civilian clothes on.

They roamed around the city for a while until Luke found the cantina where Din and him spend that evening so long ago. He nodded at Wedge, his friend nodded back at him and when they were stepping inside he caught a glimpse of a blue helmet out of the corner of his eye, Luke's eyes widened realizing that he found another mandalorian, but this mandalorian was already out of sight, disappearing between the people on the street. Luke touched his friend's upper arm absentmindedly and walked down the street in order to find the mandalorian.

They reached a crossroad "This way." Said Wedge tilting his head towards an alley, they were almost approaching the end of the passageway when a punch landed on Luke's back squeezing the air out of his lungs, making him fall on his knees coughing, his hands on the ground as he looked heavenward, everything became blurry. When he looked over his shoulder he found the mandalorian grabbing Wedge from behind pointing at his neck with a knife.

Luke, as reckless as he was, threw himself at them and the mandalorian let go of Wedge clutching Luke by his upper arms and hit his forehead with his helmet, Luke stumbled as the man was hitting a button in his vambrace and the blonde knew what that meant, he was almost dead, Wedge was still on the floor but he managed to sweep the mandalorian's leg making him fall against Luke, when the mandalorian pulled back the blonde was already pressing the tip of his vibro-knife against the man's neck.

"Move and you're dead." He said through gritted teeth. He was straddling the mandalorian now, he looked down at him realizing the man was huge, broad, even thicc. He swallowed through the lump in his throat not sure if he could walk out of this alive.

"Where did you get this?" He asked and Luke frowned.

"I need information about Din Djarin." Luke said instead.

The mandalorian grunted hitting Luke's back with his knee and clutched his arms as he rolled them over, now Luke was beneath him "What did you do to him? What did you do to him?" He kept asking "This is his vibro-knife!" He said trying to control Luke's hand as the young man was still trying to point the blade at him "What did you do to him?"

Luke was clenching his jaw, struggling to get rid of the massive man crushing him when Wedge pointed at the mandalorian's ribs with his blaster. The mandalorian froze.

"We need your help, I'm Wedge and this is Luke, please, we know Din, we're not here to hurt anyone."

The mandalorian stayed hovering over Luke for a while and then he fixed his visor on the blonde's face "You are Luke?"

Luke arched his eyebrows and then nodded, still shaken by their confrontation.

"Din's Luke?" He asked as he was withdrawing his hands from Luke's wrists.

Even as railed up as he was, his heart leapt in his chest when he heard the mandalorian calling him Din's Luke.

"Uh-huh." He managed to say sitting up on the floor, he narrowed his eyes "He told you about me?" He couldn't help but ask.

The mandalorian rose to his feet offering him a hand, Luke grabbed it and he stood up slowly, feeling a sharp pain when he breathed in, he took his free hand to his ribcage. "I only know your name, that's all he told me, well, that and that he's seeing you." The mandalorian said letting his hand go.

Luke's expression softened thinking about Din telling his friends that he was seeing him and he couldn't be more proud "And you are?"

"I'm Paz Vizsla."

Luke's eyes went round. The Paz Vizsla? The same that broke Din's heart when he was a teenager? Luke didn't know Din was still in contact with this man, his blood was boiling but he couldn't say a word, besides he was there only to know about Din's whereabouts. He wouldn't lose focus.

He nodded instead "Is he here?"

"Din? No." Paz shook his head.

"Do you know where he is?" He closed the distance between them staring at the man's visor.

"What is this all about?"

Luke looked down "I think something happened to him, it's been three weeks since he commed me and I sent him tons of messages, he never answered."

Vizsla shrugged "He tends to disappear from time to time, I wouldn't worry about it if I were you."

"No, you don't understand, this never happened before." Luke insisted "Please, anything, I need to know where he was going."

"Tatooine." The mandalorian sputtered.

Luke drew in a sharp inhale "Tatooine? Are you sure?"

"Listen pretty boy, you're pushing here, yes, I'm sure, I was the one who told him about that job, so yes, he was going to Tatooine." He said towering over Luke and he understood that he shouldn't push his luck, he had a lead and that was more than enough.

"Luke, this was a detour but we need to go back now, we can't go to Tatooine." Wedge said when they were approaching their X-Wings.

The blonde clutched his upper arm with a feeble smile on his face "You're right, we can't go to Tatooine, that's why I'm going there alone."

His friend shook his head slowly not breaking eye contact with him. Luke nodded.

While he was traveling through the galaxy Luke rubbed his fist against his eyes fighting the tears threatening to fall. Two days earlier he sensed through the force that Din was in pain, he couldn't understand the nature of those feelings until he came to the conclusion that this was another manifestation of their deep connection, he thought that the force has yet to fail him and that made his heart ache, he squeezed his eyes shut and the tears finally rolled down his cheeks "Hold on, love." He said under his breath "I'm coming."

#dinluke #din djarin #luke skywalker #dinluke fanfiction #castles on the sand fanfic #skydalorian

11 notes · View notes