#greta van fleet angst
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CAPITAL VICES | ENVY
Envy: the intense desire to have something that someone else possesses.
Masterlist
Listen while reading: Poison - Alice Cooper
Pairing: Jake Kiszka x f!reader
Word Count: 15.5k
Warnings: SMUT 18+, unprotected sex, semi-public sex, oral (f!receiving), fingering (f!receiving), dom/sub, sir kink, praise, degradation, bratty sub, lots of dirty talk, name calling, overstimulation, forced orgasm if you squint, drinking, swearing, fighting, mentions of cheating, mentions of breakups/breakups, mentions of hookups, mentions of substance/addiction/withdrawal, mentions of divorce/bad past relationships, mentions of death/dying, mentions of loss of a parent/grief, guilt, regret, depression, general sadness, anxiety, jealousy/possessiveness, very brief mention of guns, sorry if i miss any!
😘 as always, enjoy, be kind, and don’t mind any grammar mistakes!!
The haze of smoke in the room was becoming overwhelming, and even though it would normally be enticing, now it seemed nothing short of a nuisance. A basket of fries sat in front of you, ketchup lazily pooling next to the pile of fried food. Although originally put there for a dipping sauce, now it’s only purpose was to make the fries soggy and even more unappetizing. Your hunger seemed to have fled you, but in truth, never really existed in the first place. You only convinced yourself to order it as an attempt to resume some sort of normalcy to what life was like months ago. A triple whiskey sat in front of you, deliciously tempting, but the exact opposite of what you needed to feel better. Ray approached you, a knowing look in his eye and his usual, raggedy towel slung over his shoulder.
“Been a while, darlin’.” He leaned on the countertop, looking down at your untouched order. “Missed ya.”
“Yeah, I guess it has.” You chuckled, swirling your ice around your glass. “How’ve you been?”
“Livin’.” He replied, taking a long look over your face. “And you?”
“Oh, you know.” You forced a smile onto your lips, beginning to realize that coming out was the worst thing you could have done. “Working, sleeping, and working some more. An exciting life I live.” You neglected to mention the days of wallowing that had come before your arrival at the bar and the horrific heartbreak you were experiencing. Now that you did not have Jake to occupy your time, you had decided to return to your weekly Friday night routine; drinking yourself into oblivion at the bar and falling asleep alone. What used to be so fantastic was now gut-wrenching, and the thought of returning to an empty bed was killing you.
It had been about a week since your blowout with Jake, and he did well to heed your wishes. Not once had he tried to reach out, and neither did you. As the days dragged on and no contact was had, you slowly started to understand that the relationship was over, and all you could do was mourn what was once so beautiful. Instead of trying to fix things, you thought it was easier to tend to your wounds in seclusion and move forward with your life instead. You hadn’t even so much as looked at a picture of him or spoken his name, and you didn’t plan on it. If you knew one thing about healing, it was that doubling back only ever made it hurt worse.
You missed him, but not nearly enough to lose your dignity by begging for him to come back. If he did not want you, and sex was the only thing you were good for, so be it. He got his fill, and you would not lose any more respect for yourself by running back to him and trying to get him to see you were worth more than that.
“Not spending time with that guy who was with you the other night?” He asked, raising an eyebrow as he waited for a response.
“No, definitely not.” You gave a chuckle, shaking your head. “Waste of my time, Ray.” You reminded, forcing him to recall your many drunken ramblings about men.
“He do wrong by you?” He asked, trying to get to the bottom of your quiet brooding. You shifted in your seat, taking a long sip from your beverage.
“No,” you shook your head. “I started it.” You confessed.
“Don’t think you’d be this upset if he didn’t do anything wrong.” He said, polishing the rims of a few glasses that just came from the dishwasher. You shrugged your shoulders, finding the familiar burn of the whiskey comforting. Finally, you seemed to find some sort of connection to the version of you that lived before Jake, even if it was through cheap liquor and the company of an old bartender.
“He did, but the blame is still on me. He might have done wrong, but I was the one who let him.” You let your eyes focus on the grain of the wood in the bar counter, finding it easier to avoid eye contact.
“Darlin’, I think it’s time you stop blaming yourself for everything. What others do to you isn’t your fault, and you’re allowed to be mad at someone other than yourself.” He sat another drink in front of you, noticing you were already running low on liquor. “That one’s on the house.”
“Four daughters really taught you a thing or two about advice.” You gave a solenn smile. “I’ll try my best.”
“Four daughters gave me a lot more than good advice.” He chuckled, wiping down the table as he spoke. The fatherly tone sent your heart into agony. He was so proud of his children, and nearly every time you visited the bar, you heard about all of their accomplishments and struggles. It was a beautiful thing to see a father love his children so dearly, but you could not refute the jealousy that plagued you every time you listened to the stories.
It was not jealousy over the fact you did not have a good father and they did, because in your opinion, your father was the best one in the entire world. You were jealous that yours was not around to speak such admiration about you to others, and he was not there to pat you on the back and speak his own advice. You missed him with a fervor, and in the last week, it was more intense than it had been in a very long time. You wished so badly that you could have your dad by your side, speaking truth about the stupidity of boys and speaking praise about how you were better than what Jake made you feel.
Your mother, of course, could do all of the same things, and your sister too, but it was not the same. Missing your father was the most difficult thing you had ever done, and it made you want to seclude yourself until the pain passed through. You did not want to reach out to the rest of your family for the same formalities; he was the only person who could truly make you feel better, and it had always been that way. You were angry that he was not here to help you through what seemed like your biggest heartbreak yet, even including the broken marriage that crumbled before you ever grew into an adult.
The heartbreak Jake had caused was violent, devastating and above all, deadly. It came about in such a way because your feelings for him creeped up on you, silent and unforgiving as you fell hopelessly in love with him. You had never got along with anyone else so swimmingly, and nobody else in the world had ever made you feel like he did. Most of all, it hurt so badly because he was the last person in the world you expected to hurt you.
He was the first person you trusted enough to know such intimate details about your life, and the first person in which you opened up to without a paralyzing amount of fear. You knew that you had done wrong, and you should not have let your past experience define what could have been with Jake, and if you could, you would take it all back in a heartbeat. You wished you had the ability to respond without all of the defenses you built up so high, and you wished that you could have swallowed your pride enough to realize that all he wanted to do was care for you. You loved Jake more than you ever thought you could, and if you had the chance to do it all again with the same outcome, you still would.
You knew that his response was due to his own hurt, but it did not take away from the things he said to you. You hurt him so much by rejecting him so bluntly and without hesitation, and you regretted it immensely. Jake was the last person you wanted to treat so poorly, because he was the first person to show you kindness at the hands of another. But, when you thought about his harshness for too long, a wave of nauseous overtook you and tears filled your eyes. You had hurt him, but he had hurt you just the same. You did not want to blame him for his actions, especially knowing that they came from a place of pain, but you could not choke down the bitter taste of his insults. If he could change his mind so quickly, you worried that maybe he thought that way all along.
The hurt also stemmed from your complete transparency with him. You opened up, told him more than you’d ever told anyone else, and moments later, he threw your relationship back in your face and denounced it to meaningless sex. To you, the sex was all but meaningless, and you truly thought it meant just as much to him. After the months of shared nights and memories that would stick with you for a lifetime, you hoped that you meant more to him than sexual gratification. You poured your heart out to him, telling stories of a failed marriage and a dead father in hopes that he would keep it safe and maybe in turn, take some weight off your shoulders. It was incredibly difficult for you to tell him so much, especially when you dedicated your entire life to keeping it hidden. It killed you to know that he would turn into a stranger again even after knowing you so well, and that your biggest secrets were in the hands of someone who you no longer wanted to know.
You were so caught up in your internal brooding that you didn't even notice Ray leave your side, nor did you hear the chime of the bell sound above the front door. It was not like you would have turned to look anyway; your interest in anything other than getting drunk was greatly lacking, and worrying about what others were doing would only hold you back from your intentions. If you found yourself concerned about the happenings of everyone else, it was take too long to get to the level of drunkenness you aspired to be, and you would have to stay at the bar far longer than you wanted.
You were a creature of habit, and despite your lack of desire to be at the bar, you needed to feel like yourself again. The only way you could do that was to carry on as if Jake Kiszka never stumbled into your life at all.
Your second drink was threatening the end when you felt someone take a seat beside you. You would not have turned to look if they did not extend a warm greeting, and even then, you wished you had ignored it.
“Hey, Josh.” You forced a smile, knowing that he was the worst person you could have encountered, only second to Jake himself.
“Fancy meeting you here, friend who is a girl.” You were certain that he had just reached out and stabbed you in the chest. The pain was unbearable, and it was nearly blinding. You kept your eyes glued to the glass in your hand, unsure if you could maintain eye contact without breaking down. Then, a fleeting feeling of fear ran through you. ‘Friend who is a girl’ was an awfully endearing term for someone who just broke his twin brothers heart. Either Josh did not know what transpired between you and Jake, or he was exceptionally good at hiding it.
“It is my favourite bar, after all.” You tried to joke with him, but it only made your chest ache with even more intensity.
“I knew there was a reason Jake suggested this place.” He chuckled, having an a-ha moment as he pieced the puzzle together. “It all makes sense now.” He gave an airy sigh, turning to the bartender to order a drink. “And one for her too, please.”
“Oh, Josh, no need for that-“
“I insist.” He was so similar to his brother that it was scary. As you waited for the drinks, you pondered his elusive words for a moment. From all that you knew about Josh, he did not seem deceitful in the slightest. If anything, he seemed like he was a terrible liar. Josh did not know a single thing that transpired, and you would be damned if you were the one to tell him.
Then, an evil idea infiltrated your sorrowful mind. If you pushed Josh in the right direction, he might have the answers to all of the questions you’d been wondering about in the past week.
Your sin had not only effected your relationship with Jake; now, it seemed to have an impact on every aspect of your life, including relationships with even the furthest of acquaintances.
“So Jake wanted to come here tonight?” You asked, trying your best to put on a mask of confidence. You yourself had never been very well versed in deceit, but you knew that it was your only shot at getting any real answers. God knows you would never reach out to Jake yourself, and his twin brother seemed to be the only chance at finding out the truth.
“Yeah, he was pretty adamant about it. I wasn’t sure why until I walked in and saw you sitting up here all alone.” He gave you a grin, turning to thank the bartender as he slid the drinks your way. “I’ll start a tab, too.” Ray nodded, raising an eyebrow at you, the expression full of inquiry. You waved him off, making it clear that you would stay to chat about it later.
“Thank you,” you replied, taking a sip from your new beverage. He shrugged you off, the gesture small and nothing that was requiring of a thanks.
“Jake was sick all week, so when he asked us all to come out, we jumped at the chance. He skipped practice and everything, which is really unlike him. I’ve seen him pick up that guitar with pneumonia.” He chuckled.
“Oh, wow. I didn’t know.” You breathed, realizing then that he took the separation just as hard as you did.
“I’m surprised you didn’t catch it from him. He was so sick he couldn’t even get out of bed. I went over to his place once, but he was asleep so I just let him be.” Josh had no idea, but you were indeed suffering from the same sickness that Jake had. Heartbreak was more deadly than any other virus, and the two of you were plagued with it. Apparently Jake had the same idea as you and was hoping for a peaceful night to drink the despair away. Or, he was plotting for the absolute opposite.
“Yeah, that is strange. He never told me he was sick.” You muttered, lying through your teeth. Of course he didn’t tell you he was sick; he hadn’t told you anything at all since the last time you saw him.
“So was this planned, or is he just pulling a classic Jake move and hoping he’ll run into you?” Josh raised an eyebrow.
“Definitely not planned, so it must be the latter.” You took another long drink from your glass, wondering when the whiskey would satiate the hurt in your heart. When the burn did not even come close to the painful ache, you worried that it might be permanent.
“Something on your mind, friend who is definitely not a girlfriend? You seem off.” You caught his eye, nearly laughing at his statement. He was correct, you were definitely not a girlfriend, and now it was unlikely that you ever would be. You hated the fact that the option was no longer possible, because being his girlfriend no longer seemed like the worst thing in the world. If anything, you almost liked the idea.
“Lots, but nothing important.” You admitted, knowing that you could never profess such feelings to the brother of the man you loved so deeply. Telling Josh before Jake would be blasphemous, and you could not bring yourself to involve him in the mess you made. Well, any further, anyway.
“I think it’s important,” he assured you, trying to hold your gaze in hopes that his eyes would speak the truth better than his words could. You gave him a soft smile, appreciating his kindness but painfully aware that you were undeserving of it. Once he knew the truth, you were certain he would like you a lot less than he did in that moment. You felt guilty that you were maintaining a conversation with him after hurting Jake so much, but you could not explain your need to talk to him. He was the closest thing you had to a friend, even if you did not know him very well. More than that, he reminded you of the boy you missed with such intensity. When you spoke to him, he gave that same sense of home, even if he was not the home you were in need of. He was the vacation while you awaited retirement.
“It’s just work stuff. Had a particularly hard client, and I’m just trying to forget about it.” You lied with ease, the dishonesty beginning to turn your soul black and your morals upside down. For your entire life, you valued the truth, and ever since you met Jake, it seemed like you’d forgotten all about it. You lied to him about your feelings, and now you were lying to his brother, too. You were unrecognizable, the sinful months beginning to morph you into someone you tried so hard to run away from. The devil worked fast, and you had not yet found the strength to tell him to stop. You worried that if you could not find the courage soon enough, you would never recover.
“I’m sure you’ll prove them wrong. If you’re as talented as Jake says you are, I’m not sure how anyone could be dissatisfied with your work.” His name sent another blow straight to your stomach.
When a hand was placed on his shoulder and his attention was pulled in another direction, you were thankful for the break. You needed a moment to regain yourself, and you could not do that with Josh’s burning stare and reassuring words pointed at you. The guilt was eating you alive, and you knew you would have to come up with an excuse to evade his company if you wanted to make it through the night alive.
When you managed to catch your breath and settle the erratic nature of your heart, a hand landed on your own shoulder. You looked back, hoping to find one of the other two boys that did not have any affect on you, but instead, you were met with a sinking feeling in your stomach and an emotionally heavy gaze. You couldn’t believe that he approached you first, but as you looked over at Josh’s smiling face, you realized that it was likely all for the appearance. So, in hopes of avoiding and awkward questions, you threw on your biggest smile of the night.
“Jacob,” you greeted, trying to appear comfortable under his burning touch and unwavering stare. There was an obvious hint of reluctance in his eye which easily confirmed your worry. He was only talking to you on behalf of hiding the truth from Josh. You expected to be greeted with anger, or even distaste for him catching you sitting with his brother, but it did not seem like he felt that way at all. If anything, you felt that behind the reluctance to speak to you, pain was pooling in his expression.
“Long time no see, sweetheart.” The pet name sent your blood cold. What once was so comforting and sweet now seemed like an insult, or a backhanded gesture to get the last laugh.
“Will she be joining our soirée tonight?” Josh asked his brother. The two of you shared a look, and eventually you turned to Josh with a small shake of your head. In that moment, he realized the depth of the situation and a sense of sympathy formed on his face. “I see,” he said, taking a drink from his cup to avoid the awkwardness of speaking again.
“Could I… would you mind… I’d just like a minute alone with him, if that’s alright.” You struggled through the statement, anxiety written all over you. You had no idea what you were doing, but you were too far gone to stop yourself, now. Something about Jake made it so difficult to think before acting.
“Oh, yeah, f’course.” Josh said, nearly tripping over himself to stand. “I’ll grab that booth over there. I’m sure Sam and Daniel will be joining us soon.” He said, not waiting around for a second longer. You watched as Josh disappeared, almost immediately regretting your decision to stay. After a few moments of awkward silence filled with background chatter and obnoxious music, you managed to turn to face him.
“Can you… sit for a minute?” You mumbled, embarrassed to be taking the step. You didn’t notice it, but he was overjoyed that you spoke to him at all. He did come to the bar with intent to find you there, but he certainly did not expect a friendly conversation from you.
“Sure,” he bit down on his tongue, holding back the term of endearment that was begging to be said. He took post in the stool that Josh had previously occupied, looking down at his hands for a moment to gain enough courage to meet your eyes.
You did not know what you were doing, only what you felt in your heart. Had you stopped yourself from speaking and thought about the repercussions, you would have realized how bad of an idea it was to talk to him.
“I’m sorry,” you breathed, looking over at his face.
Maybe you even would have understood that apologizing was giving him the key to your heart again, which would inevitably land you just as hurt and broken as you had been all week.
Doubling back on your promise to stay away from him was essentially pointing a loaded gun at your head, and talking to him was equal to pulling the trigger.
“You’re sorry?” He asked, appalled at the thought of you apologizing. When you asked him to sit, he’d been preparing for the cruelest of insults and the worst of your thoughts. “No, angel. I’m sorry.” You has completely thrown him off track, and every thought he had while waking into the bar no longer existed. The only thing that mattered was your sad eyes and your heart that was splayed so delicately on your sleeve. The hurt was gone, replaced with the longing he’d been burying deep inside himself.
“You don’t need to be.” You shook your head. “Well, you do, but not nearly as much as I should be.” You did not have intent to rekindle the relationship, but you did want to settle the score.
At least that’s what you were trying to convince yourself. As you repeated it in your head, your hands were desperate to reach out for him and your body was aching to be held by him again.
“I shouldn’t have responded like that.” You let out a long breath, trying to gather your thoughts as you poured your heart out to him. “I, uh, I don’t like falling in love, and relationships terrify me, but you didn’t deserve that.” You had no idea why you were trying so hard with him, and no idea why you hoped that he would understand. You didn’t want to be with him, and you didn’t want him to feel like that was your intent. It was better left unsaid, but for some reason, you could not will yourself to walk away from him. Even more so, you could not let him walk away from you again. “I do care about you, Jake. I just don’t really know how to do that anymore, and when you said it so bluntly, it scared the shit out of me.”
“Oh.” He breathed, enthralled in the details of your face. He felt himself falling for you all over again, and this time, it did not scare him nearly as much as the last. You tried to deny it, but you felt the familiar gravitational pull pushing you towards him. You were enamoured with him from the minute you caught sight of his face. “I shouldn’t have thrown it on you like that. It was unfair, and I can see that now. I just… it felt right, and I couldn’t stop myself.” He admitted, almost appearing nervous as he tried his best to be transparent with you the same way you were with him. “I promised you, y/n, and I hate that I couldn’t keep it.” You swallowed thickly, your eyes darting to the whiskey glass in your hand.
“I guess I didn’t keep my promise very well, either.” You chuckled. “I couldn’t even admit it, even if we were playing house every day.” You sipped your drink, hoping that it might calm your nerves. When he looked as if he was waiting for you to continue, you did. “I care about you a lot, Jake. So much that it scares me. I felt it, too, and I don’t know why I couldn’t just say it, or at least respond with less… crazy.” You laughed. For the first time since he’d joined you that night, a smile crossed his lips, too. It was blinding, the kind that you couldn’t fake, and it warmed your heart.
“You’ve always been more than sex.” He confessed, profound and sincere. “You are worth the whole world and more, and I’m sorry that I said that. I didn’t mean it, but it doesn’t mean that it didn’t hurt.” You were so relieved that you felt tears begin to prickle your eyes. For the first time since he walked out of your house that night, the world did not feel like it was ending. “And you look stunning tonight, as always.”
“Don’t push it, Jacob.” You giggled, feeling the need to lean over and kiss him. You held back, not out of fear of love, but because you worried he might not want it. There was no way you could stop yourself if he leaned in first, and the more the seconds passed, the more comfortable you grew with the thought.
“You remember the last time we sat here?” He raised an eyebrow, leaning into you so similar to how he did that very first night.
“How could I forget?” You rolled your eyes. “Pretty sure you were wearing the same, tacky dress pants.”
“And you were just as insulting.” He teased, but the look in his eye lead you to believe he was not hurt by your words. Instead, he seemed estatic to hear that same tone of voice again.
“Two condoms in your wallet?” You bit back a smile.
“Three, actually.” He corrected. “Was hoping I could find someone who I could keep with me all weekend.” The look in his eye darkened slightly, letting you know he was thinking of all the filthy things the two of you could get up to with three, uninterrupted days.
“Maybe you’re looking in the wrong place.” You offered, pretending as if you weren’t thinking of the exact same things.
“Am I?” He challenged, leaning just a bit closer. “Don’t tell me I have to do this all over again.”
“A little courtship wouldn’t kill you, Jacob.” You swung your chair in his direction, facing him with the playful look in your eye he loved so much. “How bad do you want it?” You pressed further, leaning down slightly so he had a clear view of the cleavage your dress was allowing.
“I don’t even think I could make it to the bathroom, this time.” The seriousness in his tone was chilling, and in a moment of sheer irrationality, your hand reached over and rested on his. The moment contradicted all he had been afraid of, and although the gesture was small, it was more permissive than anything you’d done in the time you knew him.
He stood, moving towards you and capturing your face in his hands. With great intensity, he leaned down and placed his lips to yours. The kiss was heated, letting you know that he’d been thinking about it just as much as you had in the time spent apart, and neither of you wanted it to end.
For a moment, things seemed perfect.
But, you were far too grown to believe that perfection was possible, and your judgement was momentarily clouded by the yearning of your heart.
When you lived a lifestyle as sinful as yours, the devil had a helping hand in every aspect, and God did not have enough sympathy to grant you enough grace to allow for a moment of peace.
“Too much to say I missed you?” He mumbled against your lips, dreading the moment in which he would have to part from you. It was a phrase the two of you used often, and the answer was almost the same every single time.
“Just enough.” You replied, your heart begging to burst from your chest.
The problem was nowhere near resolved, and all you had done was found an island after being stranded in the ocean. It allowed for temporary relief, but not salvation.
“Can I buy you a drink to make up for it?”
“If we’re keeping score, I’d owe you plenty of drinks.”
“This is more than enough for me, angel.” He assured you, his lips still hovering over your own.
“One drink, then, and I’ll make it up to you later.” You offered, giving him a sly smile. The filthy invitation was subtle, but he could read you like a book. Filthy was the only thing the two of you knew, and it would not be easy to break out of it, even if you both committed to trying.
“Can we skip to that part? I don’t know if I can wait that long.”
“So impatient, Jacob.” You let out a disapproving tsk. “I heard once that the wait makes it all the better.”
“What can I say, sweetheart. You always bring out the worst in me.” His thumb drifted over your cheek, the glimmer of love in his eye returning as if it never left. “Besides, I think we have a lot of time to make up for.” His other hand landed on your thigh, just below the ending of the skirt of your dress. The touch was light, but electrifying. You knew that you could search to the ends of the earth, and you would still never find anyone who even came close to Jake.
“Don’t get yourself worked up, honey. It’ll be a long night for you.” You reached out, your hand landing on his side as you pulled him closer.
“For me?” He raised an eyebrow. The two words sent a rush of arousal straight to your core, and for a moment, you thought you would allow him to fuck you right over the bar top if it meant you could have him again. “Careful, angel. Would hate to have to remind you of who’s in charge.” You squeezed your thighs together to satiate the ache that was steadily growing. He noticed the tense of your muscles under his hand, a wicked look in his eye forming as he realized the mess he was causing between your legs.
“A double whiskey, please.” You tried to keep your voice as strong as possible, but the words came out strained. You were desperate to change the topic, but he was never one to give up so easily. He tightened his fingers around your leg for just a moment, the familiar smirk growing on his lips as he stepped away.
“Whatever you want, baby.” He hummed as he took a seat again, waiting for the bartender to return to the two of you. “Just be sure that’s what you want.” He said, looking over his shoulder at Ray who was serving a group of older men.
“What game are you playing, Jacob?”
“No games,” he promised “I’m just saying, if you want something, don’t be scared to ask for it.” At his words, something inside you snapped. You stood, not the least bit worried about your bluntness, and gave him a hard stare.
‘Self-righteous prick’ you thought to yourself. ‘God, I love it.’
“Meet me in the bathroom.” You said, only loud enough for him to hear. Hiding a smile, he watched you as you stormed towards the bathroom, his eyes focused intently on your ass. With a shrug of his shoulders, he finished the last of your drink, waiting only a moment before he stalked off in the same direction, uncaring about anyone catching you two in the act. When he approached the door to the bathroom, he took a deep breath to calm himself.
He raised his hand to knock on the door, but you swung it open and pulled him inside before his fist even had the chance to hit the wood. Before the door was closed behind you, your lips connected with his in a fervent embrace. As you attempted to push the door shut, your other hand was already unbuttoning his infuriatingly attractive shirt. His hands were on you, roaming every exposed inch of you and familiarizing himself with the feeling of you on his skin.
“And I’m the impatient one?” He smirked against your kiss, unable to hold back his thoughts.
“Shut the fuck up.” You muttered, finally managing to free the last button from his shirt. He reached up, tangling your curled hair in his fist and holding it tightly.
“Watch your fucking mouth.” He warned. Just because he had missed you did not mean that he was willing to give up the control.
“Shut the fuck up, sir.” You repeated, making sure to annunciate the title with as much detail as you could. As much as you missed his company, you missed pushing his buttons far more. “Is that better?
“Do you want me to leave you here all by yourself?” He questioned, the dominance in his voice familiar and incredibly enticing. Perhaps you decided to misbehave just to see it again, because in that moment, you felt at home again. “I will, angel. I’ll go out and order a drink, and you can take care of that ache between your legs all alone.” Your stomach plummeted at the thought of him leaving you on your lonesome. “You don’t like the sound of that, do you?”
“No, sir.” You shook your head, focused on his erection that was pressing into your hip. You doubted that he would do as he said, but you still feared that he might.
“Then lose the fucking attitude.” He ordered, taking a step forward so you were pushed against the wall. “I missed you too, but you need to be good for me, okay? If we’re in here for too long, people are going to notice we’re gone, and then we’ll be in trouble.”
“Okay.” You breathed, agreeing and knowing it was best to get to the point as fast as you could. Avoiding an awkward conversation was in your best interest, and your best interest was his biggest priority. You watched him as he sunk to his knees before you, his fingers bunching up the fabric of your dress and hiking it up to your navel. His lips dusted over your thighs, the sight nearly sending him weak. It had been far too long since he had you like this, but as much as he would have loved to keep you there with him all night, he knew he had to hurry.
“Dressing up for someone, sweetheart?” He asked, letting his fingers trail over the black lace of your thong. He tried to frame his question as inquisitive, but you knew it ran far deeper than teasing you. He was wondering if you had plans to meet with someone else. The thought nearly made him sick, but he felt as though he needed to know the answer.
“No, sir.” You promised. He looked up, catching your eye and living in the moment of sincerity.
“So this is all for me?” He smiled.
“Always.” You reached down, cupping his cheek in your palm. His eyes fluttered closed for a moment, feeling the warmth and wishing it could last forever. His fingers hooked through the sides of your underwear as he slowly pulled them away from your hips. He let the flimsy material fall to your ankles, his eyes heavy and clouded with desire for you.
“You’re too good to me, angel.” He purred, helping you free one leg from the thong. Instead of focusing on the other one, he guided the freed leg over his shoulder and placed a trail of sloppy kisses on the inside of your thigh.
The air between you was different, but in no negative way like you previously thought it would be. It was more passionate, more relaxed, and most of all, more loving. The confession of feelings did not change anything between you two like you feared. It only seemed to made the connection stronger, and so much better. You felt like an idiot for turning him away, and you regretted turning him down without a second thought. All that the two of you were doing was loving; the only difference from then to now was the words being spoken into existence. You cared much too deeply about the small word that held so little value, and not enough about the boy who found home between your legs. Now that you had him again, you vowed to never let yourself be so foolish again.
When his mouth connected with your core, you could not contain the pornographic moan that left your lips. A week to most was nothing, just a small amount of time that was easily forgotten. A week without Jake, however, was no less than torture, especially having left things so badly. The feeling of his tongue on you was addicting, and for the last seven days, you were a woman plagued with the worst of withdrawals. One hundred and sixty eight hours without his touch was excruciating, and ten thousand and eighty minutes without the grace of his presence felt worse than any hell that awaited you in the afterlife.
Any time spent away from Jake was horrible, and you never wanted to be apart from him again.
“Taste just as good as I remember, sweetheart.” He pulled away just long enough to slip in the comment, the husky tone of his voice sending your knees weak. “How fast do you think you can cum for me?”
“I don’t know, baby.” You breathed, already missing the feeling of his mouth. He should have phrased his question better; he was not wondering about your ability to orgasm, but rather how fast he could get you there. The answer was up to him, and he was nothing if not keen on a challenge. Without any further conversation, his tongue had found your clit once again, and this time, he was working with intent. “Oh, fuck.” You whined, tangling your fingers in his hair and tugging at the roots.
The feeling of your fingers knotted in the locks of hair was exhilarating, better than any substance he could imagine. The taste of your arousal on his lips was like heaven, and he was a fool to have walked away from you. You were the best thing his hands ever had the opportunity to touch, and you were the only thing his heart desired. It did not matter if you were in the backseat of a car, or in a dirty bar bathroom, or even laid on the most expensive mattress the world had to offer; the moment was sacred to him, and it had everything to do with you.
He hummed against you, a wordless praise for the beautiful noises slipping past your lips. When you let his name mixed within them, he knew he would never hear a more beautiful sound. He was certain that the world could not offer any more than you, and his name would never sound half as pretty painted on someone else’s lips. He was unequivocally in love with you, and he no longer felt the need to run from it. This was where he was meant to be, foolishly happy and living with his head between your legs.
You let in a sharp intake of breath as he raised his hand to your cunt and slipped his fingers inside of you. Within seconds, he curled his fingers just right and hit the spot inside you only he knew how to find. He knew you better than anyone else in the world, but more than that, he was the only person who cared enough to know you so well. You were a mess, the sounds echoing off the walls adding to the sexual tension in the room and only driving him into a frenzy. Pleasing you had become his favourite pastime, and he was devestatingly good at it. Your hips bucked forward into his hand and his mouth, and you could feel him smile against you.
Driving you crazy had quickly become his trademark, and he was happy he could put the talent to use once more.
You were dangerously close, your walls constricting against him as you tried to fight the waves of pleasure. You body was sticky with sweat and your hair and makeup was likely ruined, but you didn’t care. The only thing that mattered was Jake, just like always. The knot in your belly was begging to unravel, taunting you further with every pump of his fingers and flick of his tongue. You hated how easy it was for him to send you in to such a state, but above all, you were thankful that he’d managed to find you amidst the chaos of the world.
As you began to descend into pleasure, the only thing you could think of was how grateful you were that out of billions of people, you were the lucky one to be able to have Jake.
If you told yourself that months ago, you would laugh and spit in your own face.
But the devil was a master at his trade, and this specific trade happened to be all things sex. It was impossible not to fall victim to it, even if it would eventually be the cause of your demise.
“Please don’t stop, m’gonna cum.” You pleaded, your grip tightening around the strands of hair tangled between your fingers. Your legs began to quiver and your mind quickly dissolved into desperate, obscene thoughts about the boy driving you mad. A particularly coarse moan tore from your chest, letting him know how good he was making you feel. Then, underneath the sound of your pleasure, so quiet that you almost missed, you heard him moan against you. It was filled with emotion, showing you all of him at once; the need for you, the weakness he had in regards to you, and the pure joy he felt from pleasing you.
And it sent you into absolute bliss.
You came hard, your body tensing as he held your hips tightly, keeping his mouth on you for as long as he could. He soaked up the pleasure, letting it settle heavily in his bones. It weighed him down with likeness to cement, forcing him to stay on the ground and live solely to please you for the rest of his life. As you came down, he couldn’t seem to stop himself. His tongue was still focused on your clit and his fingers moved as if he wanted to force you into another orgasm.
“Jake, please stop.” You gasped, the sting of overstimulation infiltrating every nerve in your body. You squeezed your eyes shut, trying to pull his head away from you in reaction to the feeling. He did not stop, and he did not even show any signs of slowing. He wanted you to come again, and he wasn’t willing to back down. “Jake,” you tried again, but you knew that he would not stop unless you spoke the right word. A small part of you wanted to, but a bigger part of you wanted to continue. You had learned long ago that whatever Jake was willing to give you was worth more than anything else, and pain from him was worlds better than pleasure from another.
That was the funny thing about the devil; he forced your hand in believing that his torture was bliss.
He let out another moan against you, his cock painfully hard and strained against his pants. He needed you desperately, but not as much as he needed the taste of you on his tongue. It was more than a necessity; it was a matter of life or death. If he pulled away, he feared his heart would stop and his lungs would deflate.
“Fuck!” You yelped, your abdomen painfully tense and your mind swimming with nothing but a need to slow down. Still, he was like an addiction, and stopping was not an option. You too felt as though you would succumb to death if you had to go without him. He knew that despite your protests, you were close to the edge once again. Your body told him more than your words, and the rock of your hips against his hand and the way your walls clenched around his fingers, inviting them further inside told him all he needed to know.
The next orgasm that ravaged your body set your skin on fire and reduced your brain to mush. You could not speak, nor could you even force his name out. Your throat constricted alongside the rest of your body, and sweat began to bead on your forehead. Your hands were too weak to hold on to his hair any longer, and the only reason you were upright was because of his iron grip on you. This time, when you came down, his movements slowed with the beat of your heart. He moved his mouth first, and then his fingers followed. He looked up at your face, his chin glistening with wetness, and a smile blossomed on his lips.
“How was that, angel?” He asked, slowly rising to his feet. You could not form an answer, instead only blinking at him as you tried to steady your breathing. But, your silence was enough of a response for him, and he guided you towards the countertop before you could even begin to recover.
Your head was still spinning as he bent you over the counter and unbuckled his belt. You watched him in the mirror as he spit into his hand, rubbing himself for a moment before he rested the tip of his cock on you. He caught your eye into the mirror, giving you a small smirk as he studied your fucked out expression. Your eyes were glued to his face, memorizing the details of him too, fearful that you might miss something. The seven days spent apart had done nothing but make you dread what life would be like if you never saw him again. Now that he was there, standing behind you with his hands on you, you never wanted to be apart from him again. You did not want to miss out on a single moment of life with Jake, and you felt stupid for not being able to admit it sooner.
“Do you want it, sweetheart?” He asked, his tone low and filled with lust. “Do you want me?”
“I do,” you nodded, your voice raspy and your desperation evident. You caught his eye, a chill running down your spine at the expression he held in his gaze. His jaw was hard set and his nostrils were slightly flared. The sight of him alone was sending you feral, and you didn’t know if you could wait much longer. “Please, Jake. I need you.”
“You need me?” He taunted, pushing his hips forward ever so gently. The feeling of him inside you was thrilling, even if it was just barely. Only the tip rested inside you, and even though you both wanted to go further, the small action was worth more than anything else. You were certain Jake could give you anything, even including the smallest of gestures, and you would thank him until your lungs gave out from a lack of air. Any kindness from him was enough, and you were certain his injustices even bordered pleasure. He was everything, and you couldn’t believe he was yours.
“I need you,” you reiterated, giving him a look of desperation through the mirror. “Please, baby.” You tried again, feeling him push into you a little more. You let out a sigh of relief, knowing that soon enough he would not be able to resist the temptation. “You always make me feel so good.” He took in a sharp breath at your words, finally finding enough kindness to give you what you wanted.
When he bottomed out inside of you, he sat for a moment, completely still as he revelled in the feeling. His eyes were closed, his head tipped back towards the ceiling just enough to expose the muscles of his neck. His adams apple stuck out against his tanned skin, the glisten of sweat on him making the picturesque moment even more beautiful. His shirt was still on his shoulders, but all of the buttons were undone and his chest was bare, begging to be admired. You let your eyes trail all the way from his collarbones, drinking in the detail until your gaze settled on his navel. Then, your stare landed on the sight of his hips meeting yours, thinking about how the two of you fit together so perfectly that it was sinful not to indulge in the ritual.
You clenched around him, biting back a smirk as his eyebrows furrowed in pleasure. He let his hand drift up your back, settling in tight hold on your shoulder. “I missed that tight little cunt.” He muttered, finally meeting your eyes in the reflection again. Your stomach twisted into knots, your legs going weak again just at his words. Behind his pupil, you could see the streak of evil that so often ran through him. When your eyes went out of focus, you swore that devil horns sat atop his head much like the first night you shared with him, but this time they were not hidden in the blackness of night. They were in plain sight, and you did not even believe he was trying to hide it anymore.
It was almost funny, how you had been so scared of his hellish nature in the beginning, and now you had fallen in love with it just the same as the rest of him.
He withdrew his hips slowly and steadily, and then with the force of his hand on your shoulder, pulled you back down on him with a strength that made your head spin. A cry of pleasure fell from your lips as he made it a point to keep up the brutal pace. He was sinister, and that much was obvious, yet you no longer held a fear for his godless power. As time dragged on, a part of your soul had turned vile to match the evil of his own, and the two of you had become one. You could not point a finger at him and call him the devil, because you would have to point at yourself in the mirror and say the same. The wicked nature lived within the both of you, taking over and claiming your body as it’s own. You were possessed by the power, and the two of you ruled hell as one. The fate you feared awaited you was no longer terrifying, because you were now the power you once feared.
You cannot play Russian roulette with Satan, because only he would have the knowledge to create a game so sinister. He passed you the loaded gun, and you put it to your own head even with the knowledge that there was six bullets sitting in the chamber.
You were playing a losing game; after all, how could death itself fear dying?
“This is what you wanted?” He asked, the sound of skin on skin filling the room and leaving little room for anything else. “You wanted me so bad you couldn’t even wait until we got home.”
Until we got home. Insinuating that home was only a place where the two of you existed together, and that home to him was wherever you were.
And god, he was right.
That house was nothing without him in it, and the memories made before his time meant little anymore. He was home, and that house was just a shelter to hide away in until he was there to fill it with love. This time, upon the harsh realizations, you did not shy away from the idea. Instead, you welcomed it with open arms and a smile on your face. Jake was home, a place where you could hide away from the rest of the world. He was a hug after a long day, and a warm blanket after facing the violent cold. He was a place to put your sorrow down, and where you could let the walls of defence fall. He was not the only home you’d ever known, but he was the best one you’d ever known.
You wanted to tell him you loved him. The word was lingering in the air, the sweet taste dancing on the tip of your tongue and it’s soft hand was caressing your cheek. Instead, you moaned his name and told him how good he was making you feel. It was not the confession you wanted to make, but it was enough to satiate the craving until you were strong enough to speak the truth. Sex was the only way you knew how to communicate with him, but you hoped that with time, you would finally be able to speak the words he so badly wanted to hear.
“Shit!” You gasped, his cock slamming into your cervix and sending your thighs rocking into the countertop. You could already feel bruises forming, but you could not find it within yourself to care. When you returned home and took your dress off, it was serve as a reminder that he was real and you weren’t just dreaming of someone so wonderful. A loud slur of moans fell from your lips, and his hand came up to clamp around your mouth while he continued at the same, bruising pace.
“You have to be quiet, sweetheart.” He reminded, but sounds of pleasure were seeping from his own lips. “Those are only for me. You know that.” He tried to keep his voice steady, but you could tell that he was getting close from the waver of his words. You let out a while, muffled by the strong hand anchored to your mouth. “I know, angel.” He sympathized, feeling the same way. “Cum for me.”
You did just as he asked, unravelling around his cock and dissolving into a mess below him. He watched your face in the mirror, studying every miniscule detail and searing it into his brain forever. He never wanted to forget what you looked like when you were experiencing such euphoria at his hands. He muffled every noise that slipped out, and he kept his rhythm until you relaxed against him. When your eyes fluttered open and flickered up to meet his own, he couldn’t stop himself from reaching his own climax. His hips stuttered and you felt him twitch inside of you as he painted your walls with his release. His stature faltered and he slumped over slightly, wrapping you in a blanket of warmth as his chest pressed against your back. He released his hold on your mouth as he pressed his mouth to the back of your neck, leaving a few gentle kisses on the exposed skin.
“We have a thing for bathrooms.” You breathed, looking at his reflection through heavily-lidded eyes. You couldn’t help but feel pure adoration at the sight of his face, knowing for certain that you would never see a more beautiful person.
“You know I can’t help myself around you.” He gave a lazy chuckle, straightening up as he pulled out of you. “Especially when you wear such slutty dresses. You could at least leave something to the imagination.” He joked.
“Okay, I’ll keep that in mind next time.” You laughed, pushing yourself up off the counter.
“Don’t you dare.” He warned, knowing that he’d miss it more than anything.
“That’s what I thought.” You smirked, moving to clean yourself off as best as you could. “So… we’re okay?”
“Yeah.” He nodded, smiling at the question. “We’re okay, angel.”
“I… uh, I’d like to do that other part more often, too.” You confessed. He took a step towards you, wrapping you in a hug that expressed all he felt for you in his heart. He placed a kiss to your forehead, smiling against you at the thought of building a relationship with you. When he pulled away, he also took the time to fix the skirt of your dress. Then, he reached up and swiped away your smudged lipstick with his thumb. “Sex is great, but I really like spending time with you, too.”
“We can make that happen.” He promised, looking to you with an astounding amount of sincerity in his eyes. “I’m so sorry that I said that stuff to you. You didn’t deserve it, and I will do everything I can to make up for it.” He cupped your cheek in his hand.
“I’m sorry, too.” You leaned into the touch, closing your eyes for a moment to savour the innocent intimacy. “I didn’t want to hurt you, Jake. I don’t want to hurt you, ever.”
“I know,” he said, leaning down and placing a small kiss to your lips. Your heart fluttered and your stomach twisted with joy. Slowly, you began to overcome your fear, because you knew that even the scariest of things did not seem too bad with Jake by your side. “Did you… do you want to come and have a drink with us? I’m sure Josh is out of his mind with worry, now. He really likes you, and I think he’s been scared I was going to fuck it up.”
“Yeah,” you laughed, knowing he was right. “Do you want to come back to my house, tonight?”
“More than anything.” He nodded, the words rushing out of him with a long sigh of relief. “I’ll go and order us drinks. Meet me out there in a few minutes?”
“Yeah, of course.” You nodded, shooing him towards the door. The two of you had already been gone for a suspicious amount of time and you would hate for them to catch on to your act. Jake blew you a kiss as he stepped out the door, closing it gently behind him. You smiled, your cheeks dusting red as you swiped away any fallen mascara specs from under your eyes. You touched up your lipstick and combed your fingers through your hair, and by the time you looked presentable, you could safely leave the bathroom.
You walked out, first noticing Jake by the bar. You sent him a smile, trying to hide the excitement in your eyes as you approached him. It was strange feeling giddy over a grown man, like you were a middle schooler with an embarrassing crush. It was even stranger to know that it was not only reciprocated, but he felt the exact same way you did. You joined his side, smiling at Ray as he fixed your drinks. Jake tucked you safely under his arm, pulling you closer to him as his hand rested on your hip.
“Two double whiskeys.” Ray said, placing the glasses in front of you.
“Thanks darlin’.” You smiled, grabbing yours and taking a long sip out of it.
“Can you combine her tab with mine?” Jake asked, taking a drink from his own cup. You shot him a look protest but he paid you no mind. Ray gave a nod, looking to you as if to ask if everything was alright. You gave him a subtle nod, telling him all he needed to know.
“You head over, I just need to grab my jacket and stuff.” You told him, giving him a reassuring smile.
“Sure thing.” He said, letting his eyes linger over you before turning to join his brothers.
“So it all worked out?” Ray asked, watching you collect your belongings from your chair.
“Seems so.” You shrugged. “I guess things weren’t as bad as I thought they were.”
“Don’t let him break your heart, darlin’.” He said, collecting the empty glasses littering the counters. “You’re worth more than that.”
“I won’t.” You promised, slinging your jacket over your shoulder and holding your drink tightly. “Thanks for being there for me, Ray.”
“I’ve always got your back.” He promised. “I might be old, but I’ve still got fight left in me.” You laughed at his words, nodding in agreement. “Have fun, sweetheart.”
“You know I will!” You called, turning to face the booth that the boys were occupying. Jake was just reaching the table as you began to walk over to join, but he did not sit down. Instead, he seemed to freeze in his tracks and after a few seconds, sent a nervous look over his shoulder at you.
Fear gripped you, but you continued walking towards him in hopes that you were misreading his expression. When you reached the group, you gave a smile to Sam and Danny, but they seemed to have to force their own in return. When your eyes drifted to Josh, he was looking down at his hands settled into his lap. Then, your eyes settled on an unknown girl who was sitting next to Josh in the booth, who was also making quick work at ogling Jake. You swallowed your pride, looking to Jake in hopes of a quick answer or reassurance that this situation was nothing but innocent.
Before he could explain himself, the nameless blonde stood from the booth with a grin on her face, leaning forward without any hesitation and placed a kiss on Jake’s lips. In truth, Jake did not respond, but to you it seemed as if he did. Your eyes were deceiving you on behalf of your broken heart. He placed a stiff hand on her hip, but not in any attempt to draw her closer. He was silently trying to stop her from taking it any further. He was straight as a board, his muscles tense and trying in every way to exude his distaste for the greeting.
When he didn’t respond with enthusiasm, she pulled away and with intent to cover her own bruised ego, shot you a look of daggers. You watched the two, unsure of what was happening, and completely unwilling to find out. The only thing you could do was laugh, and even that came out awkward and painful. It seemed stuck in your throat as tears prickled your eyes.
“Y/n,” Jake warned, taking a step in your direction and completely disregarding the woman who seemed so intent to get his attention. “Please.” He whispered, no louder than a pin drop. He wanted to explain before your mind got the best of you, but your decision was already made. There was nothing he could say to make you feel better.
The real reason he invited his brothers to the bar finally surfaced, and the room was heavy with the weight of his mistake. He’d been so intent to know if you were at the bar waiting for someone else because he had shown up with the intent to entertain another woman. The question was not one of inquire, but an admission of guilt. He had not invited the blonde girl out because he was interested in anything she had to offer; he had invited her to that specific bar on that specific night because he knew you would be there, dressed up and drinking whiskey while you pretended to be interested in the football game playing on the television. He wanted you to see them together, and he was betting on you having a jealous streak. He thought if he could make you jealous, you’d run straight back into his arms.
What he was not expecting was your warm welcome when he’d arrived, nor did he ever think there would be a heartfelt apology. Maturity had lost him when you’d broken his heart, and he wanted to play dirty. He was so immersed in you while you two aired out your thoughts that he failed to remember the other girl who was on her way to meet him there. You always triumphed when it came to anything or anyone else, but this time, your effect on him had been fatal. He dug his own grave and as he stood amidst the chaos he caused, he worried that he sealed it forever.
You wanted to throw your drink in his face, or to scream until your throat was raw and no more sound could be made. You wanted to tell him every bad thing you were thinking and call him every terrible name you could imagine. Instead of any of that, you seemed frozen in place. Your fingers were clasped around your glass so tightly that it nearly shattered under the pressure. Your lips were glued together despite the insults begging to break free. Your eyes held fire but they were calm, which was even more dangerous. He broke your heart once already, but this time, he’d torn it to shreds and discarded it like it was nothing.
There was power in walking away, and it just so happened that walking was your favourite thing to do.
“Enjoy your date, Jacob.” Your words came out clearer and stronger than you thought they would. You feared the familiar crack in your voice would sell you out, but not even that seemed to want to surface. Maybe it was afraid of your consequential anger, too. Your skin felt like there was a million cuts littering the surface, stinging with every pulse of your heart and stretch of your body. Your nerves felt like they were doused in gasoline and he’d thrown a match your way, igniting you without a second thought. He took a step towards you, but you took a step back and shook your head, shutting down whatever idea was running through his mind. He could see the shine of sadness begin to glaze your irises, and he felt equivalent to the dirt on the bottom of your shoe.
“Just listen to me for a second.” He pleaded, knowing that everyone at the table was watching the circus as it unfolded. Horror was not a good enough description for how everyone was feeling, and nobody knew what to do. Worse than that, nobody knew what to expect. The boys were watching you as if you would explode at any second, and god knows you wanted to. But, you were stronger than that, and he didn’t deserve such a reaction.
“Listen to what? I don’t care.” You said, shaking your head. “I don’t care if she’s your girlfriend, or if you weren’t ever planning on seeing her again after tonight, and I don’t even care if she was leverage to hold over my head. I. Don’t. Care.” Your voice was dangerously quiet. Although everyone was sitting right there, they could not hear a word the two of you were saying over the noisy bar atmosphere.
“Don’t say that.”
“I don’t care who she is, I don’t care what you’re doing, and I don’t care about you.” Much similar to his own experience, the heartbreak had turned you vile. You wanted to say whatever you could to hurt him, and you were doing it without insults and profanities. “Every time I start to think that you might be different, or I start think you mean what you say, you prove me wrong. Every fucking time. I’m done, Jake.” With that, you turned on your heel and walked away.
For a moment, you considered leaving the bar, but you could not give him that much satisfaction. This was your bar, and nobody could take that away from you. You did feel reluctant about returning to your normal seat, knowing that you could not face Ray’s knowing stare and worried questions. Instead, you walked to the other end of the bar in the second bartenders section. You knew her, but not nearly as well as you knew Ray, and not nearly enough for her to show you any concern. You drank down the liquor in your cup, the burn achingly strong, yet not nearly enough to distract you from the sound of your own breaking heart.
You ordered another drink, feeling five sets of eyes lingering on the back of your head. Jake watched as you sat down, confused and hurt about your statement, yet knowing that he deserved it for trying to play such a childish game. He was pained to know he hurt you again, and he was pained to know that you would not respond to any attempts to apologize.
So, he did what he knew best, and he carried on as if you never hurt him at all. He snaked his arm around the other girls waist, giving a short apology for the confusion, and placed a lingering kiss on her lips. If you did not care, then neither did he. If he continued on, he thing that maybe you would be upset enough to confront him.
In that moment, the two of you meant nothing to each other.
Well, that’s what you were trying to convince yourselves, at least.
You were furious, wanting to go over there and blow up at him with every single insult you could think of, to hit him and scream and cry because he hurt you so badly. Instead, you allowed yourself to peek over your shoulder with just enough time to watch him kiss her. You felt like someone had just punched you in the stomach. The air was knocked from your lungs and you felt like you were going to be sick. His lips were locked with another girls while the remnants of his orgasm was still threatening to run down your thigh and yours was lingering on his chin.
That seemed to be the most sickening thought of all.
Jealousy flooded you, making your skin prickle with indignation. The next drink that was sat in front of you was gone almost as soon as it was placed there, and you decided it was best to order two at a time to keep up with the ache in your chest. You looked back over at him again, unable to resist the urge. You saw her laughing, flicking her hair over her shoulder as she smiled up at Jake. She was clinging on to whatever he was saying, clearly hoping he would take her to the bathroom and do the same to her as he did with you just moments before.
As you studied the scene, you knew that jealousy was not the correct term for what you were feeling. You were envious of the situation in the booth. You wanted to be wrapped around him, laughing at his jokes and making relationships with his brothers. You wanted what she had in that moment, and you wanted it with a fervor you’d never quite felt before. You could not call it jealousy, because you were not worried about her taking something that belonged to you. In truth, Jake was never yours. You had ensured that long before the night’s events unfolded. You could not be jealous about something that did not belong to you, and Jake did not and he never would.
Envy was a much better description, because quite frankly, you never would have what she did in that moment. You and Jake could not comprehend simplicity, nor could you find the courage to love each other openly. Even from the very beginning, you and Jake struggled. Whether it was bickering because you refuted your connection, or because you simply enjoyed the struggle, it had never been easy. You were green with envy over something you would never have, and what she seemed to be getting so easily. You were sick at the thought, and pained to know that you’d fallen hard enough to feel such devastating emotions.
You felt a tear slip down onto your cheek as you drowned your sorrows in whiskey. Sometimes, it seemed like your own personal holy water. Once the first tear fell, the floodgates opened and your cheeks were soaked with physical reminders of your own stupidity.
You were crying so hard that your shoulders were shaking with the heaves of your chest, and you could no longer see the glass that was held tightly in your hand.
Then, a gentle touch landed on your shoulder. It was unfamiliar, but comforting, and you felt like you knew who it was before you even turned around. His second hand landed on your other shoulder, and you leaned backwards into the touch until the back of your head landed on his chest. Once he knew you were going to be receptive of his touch, he wrapped his arms around you, holding you tightly while you tried to swallow down your drowning sadness.
“Seems like you’ve been more than a girl who is a friend all along.” Josh hummed, his hold protective and his heart breaking for you.
“I’ve always been exceptionally good at lying to myself.” You rasped, raising a hand to wipe your cheeks clean.
“Mind if I sit?”
“It’s probably better if you don’t.” You sighed, sniffling away another sob.
“Well, I’ve always been exceptionally good at breaking the rules.” He shrugged, pulling out the chair beside you and taking a seat.
“That’s hard for me to believe.” You chuckled, looking over at him with puffy eyes and a red nose. You were in no state to be socializing, but he didn’t seem to care.
“You better believe it, mama.” He said, taking a sip of his own drink. You cocked your head to the side, a small smile stuck on your lips as you processed the pet name. “Penny for your thoughts?” He asked, pulling a coin from his pocket and tossing it down on the table. He seemed to be the beacon of light in the suffocating darkness. His jokes and bright smile soothed your sorrowful soul, and you wondered what it would be like to be friends with him forever. With Josh around, you had a hard time picturing any sadness at all.
“For you, it’s free.” You assured him. “And this is a quarter. I’m not that steep.” You slid the coin back towards him, watching as he stopped it with his finger. Instead of putting it back in his pocket, he tossed it in one of the tip jars sitting on the bar top.
“I’m honoured.” He gave you a grin, breathtaking and beautiful, but so different than his brothers. For twins, their differences were staggering. “He’s an idiot, you know.”
“To each their own.” You shrugged, picking up a shelled peanut from the dish in front of you for something to fidget with. “Has he been dating her the whole time?”
“Her? No.” He shook his head, almost laughing at the thought. “She was the first girl who was just a friend, but she wasn’t really much of a friend at all. More or less just a girl.” He explained, swirling the ice around his glass with his straw. “I think I ran into her the first weekend we moved here. She was sneaking out sometime in the morning, and of course, I had to introduce myself.”
“Don’t know why I’d expect any less.” You chuckled, recalling the first time you’d ever met him.
“Some people never change.” He smirked. “After that, I never saw her again. Which was fantastic, because I didn’t really like her all that much. Definitely not as much as I liked you.”
“That’s good.” You smiled, waiting for him to continue. You felt honoured that josh liked you as much as he did. He seemed protective of his brother, and rightfully so. You wondered why he thought you were so good for him when all you ever seemed to do was cause Jake pain.
“I met a few girls after that, but they never stuck around. You, though? I could see it in his eyes that day. He never wanted you leave.” He leaned back in his seat, seeming like he was racking his brain for the best way to explain himself. “Usually, the girls leave before he even bothers to get out of bed. Then, he started talking about you all of the time, and I realized that this was more than just a drunken accident. When he wanted us to meet you, I knew he was head over heels.”
“He’s got a funny way of showing it.” You replied, your distaste for his actions clear in your face. “But, I guess I’m not the best at it, either.”
“I never said he was good at showing it.” He laughed. “I love him, but it doesn’t mean I always have to agree with him.”
“True.” You nodded in agreement.
“I think I had a sneaking suspicion that something was wrong when he came home last weekend and slammed his door hard enough to shake the building and then locked himself in his apartment for days. Maybe you and I were both trying to pry some information out of each other, earlier.”
“Sorry about that.” You buried your red cheeks in your glass as you swallowed the liquid down, ashamed of your actions.
“Don’t be, ‘cause I was doing it, too.” He said, admitting to his own guilt. “You don’t have to tell me about that if you don’t want to, but I’m all ears if you need it.”
“I’m the classic sob story, Josh.” You leaned forward, signalling to the bartender to make you another drink. She gave a thumbs up in response. “Divorcée, dead dad, a knack for self punishment and a plethora of commitment issues.”
“Wouldn’t call that classic. You’ve got quite the collection of pain.” He laughed, finding your blunt statement humorous. “Is that why you were so strict on being friends?”
“Yeah, I don’t do the whole dating thing. Divorce usually does that to a person.” You joked, dumping the last of your ice into your new drink and handing the empty to the bartender. “When I met Jake, I was pretty clear about that, but there’s something about him, I guess.”
“And about you, too.” He reminded.
“I thought Jake was on the same page, but we both seemed to blur the lines. We spent so much time together that it would be more strange for us not to fall in love.” You explained. “When he confessed that he had feelings for me, I panicked. I know I shouldn’t have, but I just don’t think I was ready for anything to change. I hurt him, he hurt me, and neither of us were mature enough to apologize.”
“Until tonight.” He corrected.
“Yeah, but then he invited Barbie to drink with you guys.” You grumped, trying to fake cheerfulness as you said the nickname you’d pinned on her.
“May I add some insight?” He asked, raising an eyebrow. You caught his gaze, silently giving him permission to do so. “I don’t think he wanted Barbie to drink with us. I think he wanted you to drink with us, but he didn’t know how to ask. He invited her to piss you off, and that was before you guys talked it out.”
“He sure did piss me off, but he hurt me pretty badly, too.”
“I know, and I’m not defending him.” He wanted to make that abundantly clear. “He’s in love, and love makes him stupid. He doesn’t know how to deal with getting hurt, so he just… doesn’t. Or, he acts like a jerk.”
“You seem to know him pretty well.”
“We didn’t share a womb for nothing.” He grinned. “He’s my twin, but he’s also my best friend. I’ve been there through everything, and I’ve seen it all.”
“So you’re not just a brother of the twin kind, you’re also a friend that is considered the best.” You noted, tipsiness radiating from your statement. You liked the banter that always seemed plentiful between the two of you. It reminded you of your own sister.
“What do you think? Do I make a good friend?” He watched you closely as he waited for an answer. After a moment, you nodded.
“A great one, even.” He smiled at your words and you could not seem to ignore the blush of his cheeks.
“I’m not telling you to go back to him, or to forgive him. Although I would very much like for the two of you to be together, sometimes things just don’t work out. Jake’s a lover by nature, even if he tries to pretend he isn’t, and I know he’s cursing himself as he sits there beside her and not you.”
“Lover by nature?” You inquired, now oddly curious about his life. That was something you never would have pegged him for.
“Oh yeah,” Josh chuckled, the liquor clearly getting the best of him. “He loves to love, and he’s as loyal as a dog. When his last girlfriend broke his heart, he tried to put on this tough act and pretend that love wasn’t his thing. He did the hookups and the failed talking stages, and I think for a while he convinced himself he was truly happy with it. When he met you, I think he realized that happy was the exact opposite of how he’s been feeling for the last year or so.”
“She hurt him pretty bad, eh?” You asked, recalling the pained expression in Jake’s eye the last night you had all went to the bar together.
“That doesn’t even scratch the surface.” He grimaced. “I hated seeing him sad, but I was so happy that he actually left her for good.”
“I wouldn’t hurt him like that.” You didn’t even realize the words that slipped past your lips until it was too late. Josh gave you a sympathetic smile as you scolded yourself for letting such a thing slip.
“I know, mama.” He said, the sincerity in his voice astounding. “Why do you think I like you so much?” Your cheeks turned red at his comment, and you gave him a smile.
“I like you too, Josh.” You mumbled. “Thanks for talking to me. I feel a lot better.”
“I’m glad,” he said, looking past you and over at the pool tables. Sam and Danny seemed to be caught in a game that was headed nowhere. As he did so, you looked back at the booth where Jake was sat with the bubbly blonde. He had moved to the opposite side of the table, presumably so he could get a clear view of you and Josh. When you caught his eye that seemed to be glued to the pair of you, your suspicions were confirmed. You did not hold his gaze, nor did you signal that you even noticed him looking. Instead, you stood and brought Josh into a hug, thanking him for caring enough to check on you.
Envy was not a strong enough word to describe what washed over Jake. Yes, he wished he could be the one that your arms were wrapped around and yes, he desperately wanted to be the person who was listening to the tellings of your heart. More than that, he was furious that Josh thought he had the right to be that person for you, and he was broken at the idea of you allowing him to be. He was reaping the consequences of his own actions, and there was nothing he could do but suffer the wrath of the devil for the sins he had committed.
As you pulled away from Josh, you looked back to the booth and saw Jake leaning over the table to capture his date in a kiss. Your stomach twisted with disgust, and you felt frozen in place. The two of you were caught in a game of pain, but you weren’t even aware you were playing. You did not speak to Josh in hopes of upsetting Jake, but he was kissing her in hopes of hurting you. If you had to admit it, he was doing a fantastic job. Your pain was so loud that you barely heard Josh ask you to join them in playing a game of pool.
When he asked a second time, you mustered a nod as you fought back the urge to vomit. He led you towards the table, but your eyes could not seem to stray from the disturbing scene before you. Jake was fighting a battle that he did not need to fight at all. You had no idea what point he was trying to prove, and no idea why he had the sudden urge to stray further from the love you two were trying to rekindle. As you picked up a pool cue, you decided you did not care. When you lined up the first shot, you both knew you had already won.
He was like poison, drawing you in and burning you with every touch. You loved him so deeply even if you knew he was killing you, and it drove you crazy enough that you would even cause him harm just to hear your name on his lips. You couldn’t bear the thought of not having him, but having him too close always drove you to a bittersweet end. You knew it was time to give him up, but you did not know if you could do that at all. For certain, you knew you could not do it without one last fight.
Even as you tried to convince yourself that you did not care about his actions, the color green was bleeding from the walls. The haze of smog in the room had an emerald hue, and the green velvet of the pool table reflected exactly how your heart was feeling. You were certain that if you looked in a mirror, your skin would be following suit, too. Envy was written all over you, stemming from the unnamed blonde who was wrapped around Jake like he belonged to her. It also grew from the knowledge that Jake was letting her, as if he never had a promise to come home with you at all. You might not have seen it, but when it came to belonging, his heart only lied with you. He was yours, even if he could not express it properly.
What you didn’t see was the green vines that were tangling themselves around Jake’s body, slowly strangling the life out of him as his own envy took hold. He watched as you laughed with his brothers, drinking and carefree while you shot at the balls scattered across the pool table. He wished he could have what they did in that moment; you, with a smile on your face and a laugh stuck on your lips. He wanted you, and everything you had to offer, and he felt like an idiot for letting you walk away this time. He did not want to be in the booth with the girl that meant so little to him, and he did not want his lips on anyone but you. His regret was paralyzing, but his pride stopped him from apologizing yet again.
You were both dying as you stood, and suffering as you watched. Both of you had the power to change, but so much sin had infiltrated your lives that doing the right thing no longer mattered. Any moral, and any idea of right and wrong no longer existed, replaced with wicked evil and blind obedience to a higher power that would ultimately take your life. The devil watched as the two of you sealed your fate, laughing loudly as you walked yourselves into his trap. With one more deadly sin to go, he wondered if the two of you would ever realize your wrongdoing before it was ultimately too late.
The only question that remained was one of fate. How much sin could you commit before punishment was due? You were two people who had been sentenced to a lifetime of imprisonment at the hands of your own godless morale, and you were so blind to your own stupidity that you had not even gone searching for salvation. Better yet, you had not even realized that you were in need of it. When the time came and you were ready to repent, the church would turn you away and laugh in your face.
Religion never seems important until you’ve engaged in so much sin that salvation is no longer an option.
~
you guys didn’t really think I’d be nice enough to let them stay together, especially with wrath as the last chapter? love you 🫶🏻😉
TAGLIST:
@sacredjake @profitofthedune @thewritingbeforesunrise @sacredthethreadgvf @klarxtr @ohgodthefeeling-gvf @freefallthoughts @jaketlover @clairesjointshurt @ageofbajabule @dannys-dream @earthgrlsreasy @starshine-gvf @brujamagik @gvfmarge @ignite-my-fire @twistedmelodies @gretavangroupie @alwaysonthemend @edgingthedarkness @gvfpal @sinarainbows @writingcold @starcatcher-jake @literal-dead-leaf @takenbythemadness @gretasfallingsky @hsfallingsky @freyjalw @itsafullmoon @lyndz2names @blacksoul-27 @i-love-gvf @vikingsisthenewsexy @mp0801 @mindastreamofcolours @indigogvf @sparrowofthedawnsworld @jordie-gvf @cassy-face @highway-tuna @creadliz98 @dancingcarbon @do-it-jakey-baby
#gvf#jake kiszka#greta van fleet#sam kiszka#jake gvf#sam gvf#danny wagner#josh gvf#gvf fic#danny gvf#jake kiszka series#jake kiszka gvf#jake kiszka blurb#jake kiszka angst#jake kiszka fic#jake kiszka fluff#jake kiszka x reader#jake kiszka smut#jake kiszka fanfic#greta van fleet angst#greta van fleet fic#greta van fleet fluff#greta van fleet smut#greta van fleet fanfic#greta van fleet series#gvf angst#gvf series#gvf smut#gvf fluff#builtbybrokenbells
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London Series || JTK
18+mdni
Paring: Jakexreader(f)
Summary || Jake has a lover that lives in London. He visits her every time he’s in town, but recently the simmering situationship has taken a toxic turn.
A/N: Will they? Won’t they? Prepare for whiplash:) Give a listen to the song that inspired the story. All the love in the world to @tommie-gvf for editing this piece and putting up with all my weird questions. I ask for your patience as I’m a beginner and this is my first fic. I am very open to criticism so pretty please don’t hesitate to tell me what you think! That said, I have no words to express just how much all the love and attention y’all have already given London means to me xxx
MASTERLIST
London
London II: Refined • London II: Uncensored
Wounded: A Continuation of London
Wounded II
Wounded IIS
Wounded III
EXTRAS
London: Holiday Prelude
taglist❤️🩹 - @ageofbajabule @alwaysonthemend @anythingforjtk @becinabubblegvf @carbondancingthroughtime @dannys-dream @do-it-jakey-baby @dont-go-home-without-me @edgingthedarkness @fomopheobe @gretasfallingsky @gretavanglimmers @gvf23 @gvfmarge @heckingfrick @hsfallingsky @imleavingyoufornewyork @kiszkazz @klarxtr @itsafullmoon @jakesguitarsolo @jakesmustache @jakeysbuttsheeks @jordie-gvf-admin @lipstickitty @livkiszka @lyndz2names @mindastreamofcolours @mountain-in-springtime @mrbrownstne @nina-23-45 @sacredjake @smoking-jakelane @sparrowofthedawnsworld @styles-canvas @takenbythemadness @dancingcarbon @thewritingbeforesunrise @tommie-gvf @tripthelightfatality @vanfleeter @violet-hayes @wetkleenex-gvf @zoe-tally06
pretty please let me know if you’d like to be added to the taglist🫶🏼
#london jtk series#london gvf fic#jake kiszka#jake gvf#jtk#jake kiszka gvf#jake kiszka fanfic#jake kiszka fic#jake kiszka smut#jake kiszka x reader#jake kiska fic#jake kiskza x reader#jake fluff#jake fanfic#jake kiszka fluff#greta van fleet#gvf#gretavanfleet#greta van fleet fan fiction#greta van fic#greta van fleet fanfiction#greta van fleet fic#greta van smut#greta van fluff#greta van angst#greta van fleet smut#greta van fleet fluff#greta van fleet angst#greta van fleet series#taglist
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𝔈𝔫𝔡 𝔊𝔞𝔪𝔢 - 𝔍𝔐𝔎
jmk x f!reader
first of many, enjoy ;)
THIS BLOG IS 18+ MINORS DNI
warnings: mentions of alcohol, fake dating trope (it's a fave and I not be sorry), bit of angst, josh is a cutie
taylor's version masterpost
reputation masterpost
☮
Young Starlet Caught in Compromising Position!
Your publicist was less than pleased about the headline. Even though you had insisted nothing had happened, and that picture was simply a case of a bad angle. It wasn’t looking great, though. To be fair, the picture was pretty bad. A bruise painted your neck, lipstick smudged around your mouth as some guy grabbed your hips from behind.
It would be hard to explain yourself out of that one, to be honest. Regardless of whether the picture was accurately depicting your actions of the night, the fans had seen it. Your image had already been tainted in their eyes, and it would be nearly impossible to recover.
Big reputation, big reputation
Ooh, you and me, we got big reputations, ah
Rather than attempting to, it was decided that you required a rebrand. It started with the incorporation of darker clothes into your “wardrobe” - quoted only because it was what was chosen for you. Interviews began to shift to questioning the possibility of heavier music, to which you would coyly suggest it was possible.
Then you released a new single. It caught the attention of rock fans everywhere. There was a sudden call for a genre change, which you hoped so desperately for. The last few years of your life had made you feel like a sell out. You traded the humanity and meaning in your music for tracks that would generate streams and ranks on charts.
Within a couple years, no one remembered the popstar you had been. It was all about the rockstar you had become. And you were a big one.
It wasn’t overwhelming anymore. The work you put in was hard and abundant, but it was genuine. It showed in the love that poured from the fans over social media and in the crowds of your sold out shows.
A world tour was in the talks and an opening act was in question. Someone suggested a band you had heard a handful of times before: Greta Van Fleet, not that you ever really had time to immerse yourself in a new band. From the videos you’d seen and the songs you’d heard, you would be lucky to have them on tour with you. They were getting relatively popular and you knew you had to strike fast to get them on the setlist.
“I have a surprise for you!” Gene, your publicist, exclaimed in a sing-song tune.
“Ugh, last time you said that, I had a snake draped over my body. Still mad at you for that, actually.” You only looked up from your phone for the last sentence, otherwise preoccupied with a daunting game of 8 Ball with your best friend.
“Well, this one I’m not sure is much better, if we’re being honest,” he trailed off, “the label loves you, you know that.”
“Uh oh.” You weren’t worried.
“But in a recent poll, they found that fans think you’re …how do I put this …boring?” He strung his words together carefully, as to not offend you. It wasn’t his tone of voice that concerned you.
“Boring?! I’m practically fucking a mic stand every night!”
“Not enough anymore, babe.” He was being rather nonchalant, and you realized that being called “boring” wasn’t even the main issue that was being presented.
You narrowed your eyes at him, “So what are they going to do about it, Gene.” His name came out like the sparking embers of a fire on the forest floor.
And I heard about you, ooh (yeah)
You like the bad ones too
That was how you ended up at an intimate restaurant in Nashville, across from Josh Kiszka. He was nervous and it was actually kind of cute. It reminded you of a real date, something you hadn’t had in ages.
“I like your dress. Green. That’s my favorite color,” his eyes raked over the silk of your dress. It extended to your ankles, a slit daring to expose your leg. The straps were a little tight, and prevented you from wearing a normal bra, and the tape holding up your breasts was peeling from sweat.
“I know,” you chuckled, “everything about this is set up to be as persuasive as possible.”
“Oh. Either way. It looks great on you.” He was genuine, and as the night went on, you found that it wasn’t even his most endearing trait.
Just as the clock was about to hit 11, he was standing on your front porch, wishing he didn’t have to leave. This was an arrangement, a plan to draw attention to the both of you, driving up streams and ticket sales.
As you stood on your porch, hand lingering on the door as if it was a riddle, so close to him that you could practically taste the wine on his lips, you realized something. You realized that you were going to inevitably fall in love with Josh Kiszka, undeniable force meets immovable object. It was almost expected that dread would fill your stomach as you recognized this fate, but it never came. Instead, butterflies flew in its place.
I've passed days without fun, this endgame is the one
With four words on the tip of my tongue I'll never say
A month and half later, and several dates to show, you had proven yourself correct. But, who could blame you? What about Josh wasn’t lovable?
“I don’t want to do this anymore,” you announced to the meeting. There were a few label executives, Gene, and Josh with his team.
“What?” Josh was the first to say anything, and his face portrayed betrayal.
“Yeah, what he said,” Gene added.
You sighed, “I don’t want to pretend to be in a relationship anymore. That’s not what my job is, and I don’t see how it adds any value to my music.”
“B-But, this is what’s going to sell the tickets. A love story, performing together in the throes of romance.” You glared at the executive.
“No, our raw talent and meaningful music will sell tickets. I will not be told who I can date, when I can see them, and especially when I can break up with them. If that’s a problem, I’m sure another record label would have no problem meeting my demands.”
This is what drew Josh to you: your fiery passion. In spite of that, he was upset, especially since you hadn’t even discussed it with him. He was under the impression that you liked him, maybe even liked him. God, he felt like a middle schooler again, paired with the pretty girl for a project only for her to ask for a different partner halfway through.
I don't wanna touch you (I don't wanna be)
Just another ex-love (you don't wanna see)
As it turns out, the label no longer had a problem meeting your demands. You waited outside the board room for Josh, pulling him aside when he came out, head hung low.
“It’s not you, trust me.”
“Oh, then it’s you?”
“No. Listen, I don’t want to be told to date you, or what happens over the course of our ‘relationship.’ I don’t want the pressure of having to pretend to love you.”
“I get it, believe me. You don’t have to explain.”
“I want to do it by myself, on my terms. Love you, I mean. And believe me, I do.”
He looked up for the first time, his eyes were beautiful. But you already knew that.
“I don’t want to have to forget you, and never see you again because the tour is over. I want our love to be ours, and no one else’s.”
Josh smiled, he agreed.
I wanna be your endgame, endgame
〚taglist〛
gvf: @doodle417, @brokenbellz, @gretavanfleas, @pyrojoshy, @greta-van-chaos, @xserenax-13, @hayley1623, @kdarling1, @autumns30, @keighoe, @chalametpwk, @sammysvanfeet, @shawnsthighs, @gretavanbitches, @sammiejane22, @gretavanbestie, @jordierama, @alexxavicry, @spark-my-nature, @rainy-darling
joshy: @prophetofthedune, @loofypoofy, @gretavangracee
#josh kiszka#greta van fleet#jake kiszka#danny wagner#sam kiskza#josh gvf#josh kiszka smut#josh kiszka fluff#jake kiszka smut#jake kiszka fluff#sam kiszka smut#sam kiszka fluff#danny wagner smut#danny wagner fluff#gvf smut#gvf imagine#gvf fic#greta van smut#greta van fic#greta van fleet smut#greta van fleet fan fiction#greta van fleet angst
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Deception | Josh Kiszka X Reader | Part 1
Warnings: This fic will include angst and smut. If those aren't your thing, don't read! Minors DNI!
Word Count: 2.1K
Authors Note: I had a hurtful, but oh so deliciously angsty idea for a fic involving Josh and a reader who was a fan, and led josh on to believe that they met naturally in a grocery store.
Summary: Be careful what you wish for. Wishes answered always come with consequences.
His sheets smelled of fresh linen, like fresh clothes pulled from a clothesline, crisp with the scent of sunshine. You’d burrowed yourself into them like a cocoon of welcome warmth, wrapping yourself in the swaths of fabric.
“For someone who claims to be so hot all the time, you sure look like you’re ready to hibernate,” Josh mused, strolling into the bedroom as he sipped from the lip of a large mug. He was prepared, having made you one as well. You offered him a gentle smile.
“I’m comfy,” you replied, satisfied with the simplicity of your response.
“Sit up, silly,” He said, lowering himself onto the bed, carefully handing you your piping-hot cup of coffee. Wisps of steam billowed over the top of the mug and you sipped tentatively at the liquid, feeling it instantly liven your body from head to toe.
“How does it feel to be twenty-six years and three hundred and sixty-four days old?” you asked him, eyeing him from over the lip of the cup.
“Geez, when you say it like that, you make me sound ancient,” he chuckled. You loved the way his lips curled upward when he grinned, revealing his brilliant, white teeth. The slight gap between his front two teeth always sent flutters through your body. You caught yourself admiring his delicate, but masculine features. “But I’m excited! I never thought I’d end up planning my own birthday party.” He looked at you with amusement.
“Come on. You mean to tell me you didn’t enjoy designing your own birthday cake?” You said, taking another long swig of your coffee before lowering it to your lap as you crossed your legs. “Only you would choose that symbol.”
His widening grin told you all you needed to know. “Yeah, that was pretty cool.” His eyes glimmered with child-like amusement, which sent a pang through your chest. “I’m just glad that everyone can make it, you know? It’s hard these days to get everyone in one place at the same time.”
You nodded, reaching to place the cup on the bedside table. “Sam, Danny and I made sure that everyone could make it.” You ruffled your messy hair with your fingertips, watching him finish off his coffee. “We threatened physical violence if they didn’t.”
“Okay, but who’s the one throwing the punches?” Josh asked, his eyebrows raised with amusement.
“Who do you think?” You answered, lifting your fists playfully in front of you. “They don’t want it, I promise you.”
“Put your guns away,” He chuckled. “I bet you Jake is gonna be so jealous,” He continued, setting his cup on the side table before moving back to lay on the bed and prop up his head on his hand. His eyes brightened, his cheeks filling with color.
“Of what?” You asked, taking another sip of your coffee.
“My party.” He said lightly.
“I mean, you are the more performative of the two, so…” You admitted. He turned to you, scoffing incredulously.
“Now what is that supposed to mean?” He asked, gawking. He couldn’t hide, though, that his features were fighting the urge to twist into a ridiculous smirk. His eyes seemed to glitter as he questioned you.
“Nothing!” You said, rolling out of bed with your empty coffee cup.
“No, no! You don’t get off that easy,” Josh said, pulling at the thin fabric of your sleep shorts, pulling you back closer to him.
“Oh , you want me to say sorry?” You asked him, biting your bottom lip as your eyes glimmered with mischief.
“I thought maybe you could show me you’re sorry instead,” he said. “Come here.”
You obeyed him, leaning closer to him. “Yes sir.”
The intensity in his eyes deepened as his fingertips pulled upward to gently caress your chin and jaw, drawing your face forward to meet with his lips. The feeling of his touch ignited the heat between your thighs. Josh’s boyish features could easily morph in the matter of seconds into something almost siren-like—He naturally honed the ability to unconsciously will you to do anything for him with just a look. He harnessed the power to peer straight through your soul like glass, like he could somehow see all of you at once, including your every thought, worry, and desire. At the beginning of the relationship, it had made you feel extremely vulnerable and unguarded, but now? Now, you found comfort in him knowing everything about you. Well, almost everything. There were certain things that you weren’t ready to tell him yet. You’d wait for the right time to come clean.
You gave in to the gentle caress of his velvet lips and folded your body into an innate dance, moving in an exact mirror to him as he explored you. “You want me to show you just how sorry I am?” You whispered against his parted lips, your voice barely more than a huff of breath as your instincts began to take over. His hands slid to your hips, pulling you against him. You took that as his answer.
“Go right ahead,” he purred softly. It was moments like these when you’d often felt most vulnerable in front of a man. In most of your previous relationships, you’d been so reluctant to let your partners in, to see the most vulnerable, insecure, and sensitive parts of yourself. You’d built your walls with an impenetrable defense, constructed by so many years of hating your own body more than anyone else could. Recently, it was becoming clearer to you that there was one thing that you knew for sure about Josh. He silently set himself apart from everyone else. Not once had he ever judged you for your appearance; for the extra curves, the extra pounds, the imperfect folds and creases that were so ugly to you, but so perfect to him. Even so, he didn’t feel pity for you, either. He treated you like a person, not the fragile pane of glass you had let yourself become in the hands of so many past partners’ hands. Not a single interaction was laced with unspoken judgment, because the truth was simple. Being fat meant nothing to Josh.
You remembered those first days when Josh all but begged you to stop apologizing for the things that you couldn’t and shouldn’t change, constantly reminding you that you were a beautiful woman. “You are allowed to take up space in this world. Stop apologizing for abiding in it, Y/n. You have nothing to worry about when you’re with me,” he had said to you after a few dates, when you’d make it a point to apologize or somehow discount your appearance or importance. You couldn’t help it. It had become the safest defense mechanism that you could create; you’d insult yourself before anyone else could beat you to it.
You let yourself fall after those first few weeks, and unsurprisingly, it was one of the easiest decisions you had ever made. The loop of his fingers around yours began to feel so natural and reassuring. You could count on him to encourage you to try new things, to leave you in stitches from laughing, and at the end of the night, you could rest assured that he’d leave you thinking about him for every moment he wasn’t with you.
“What are you thinking about?” He asked, the corners of his lips twitching upward in a curious smile.
“You,” you answered honestly, reaching forward to tuck some of his curls behind his ear.
“Oh no,” he answered, his cheeks flushing. “Should I be running for cover?” He asked, pretending to get up.
“No, no, come back here,” you said, pulling at his arm. You let the moment settle into contented silence as you both let your gaze linger between each other. “Can I tell you something?”
“Always. What’s up?” Josh asked, moving to caress your arm softly as you prepared to speak. You pulled yourself upward to sit straight on the bed, and he did the same, sitting in front of you.
“You are–” you paused for a moment, figuring out the next words before speaking again. “You are the closest thing I’ve had to a home in a very, very long time, and I think I’m ready.” You both had agreed that sex wasn’t expected in the relationship until you had told him so, and even then, with Josh, you knew that you wanted it to be special when it was time.
“Ready for?” He asked, his eyes widening slightly. You watched his Adam’s apple bob as he swallowed.
“I am ready to be with you. I am ready to have sex, if and when you are.” You pulled your gaze upward to look him in the eye. “I want to be yours completely, Josh. You make me feel beautiful, and I think I am beginning to believe it, too.” The words spilled out of you easily, because for the first time, you believed them.
“You are truly marvelous,” he spoke, straightening to sit cross legged again on the bed. “I am a lucky man, and I gotta say. Thank God we love the same pasta sauce.” You couldn’t help but chuckle as he recounted your first meeting at Kroger. You had been choosing between pasta sauces, and couldn’t decide whether to stay with your tried-and-true selection or try something new.
“You want this one,” he had said, pointing to the one in your right hand–the one that was your favorite. You looked up, and were automatically struck by his natural beauty–the mixture of feminine and masculine features which were combined in an almost artistic product. You couldn’t look him in the eye, and you certainly couldn’t talk straight.
“What?” You said after a long moment, yanking yourself out of your daze. “Oh. Yeah, this one? You said, raising the jar in the air. “It’s my favorite. Don’t break it if it isn’t fixed–right?” You decided to keep your mouth shut rather than fix the saying that you had just butchered so badly. Josh laughed, reaching for a jar of his own off of the shelf.
“Something like that, yeah.” His dimples were huge, and his teeth were so white they almost seemed to sparkle. Jesus Christ. Jesus Christ. For a moment, you forgot how to swallow, how to talk, how to breathe. How are you real? You remembered thinking to yourself.
“Sorry, I’m just a little–frazzled. I’m Y/n.” you said, stupidly extending your hand to him.
“Don’t worry, Y/n. Grocery shopping can really take it out of us,” he said, taking your hand. You were grateful for his skillful segue. “I’m Josh.”
You nodded. “Nice name,” you told him before mentally kicking yourself in the head. You’d wished you’d worn steel toes, and also that you had crazy flexibility so you could kick yourself across the pasta aisle. God I’m so fucking dumb.
“I’d say yours is far more lovely,” he said, saving you again, and you couldn’t save the heat from filling your face. You were becoming intensely aware of your insecurities as you felt his eyes float over your body and back up to your face.
“Thank you,” you said quietly, feeling anxiety exploding through your system like a disturbed hornet’s nest.
“Well, I hope your pasta turns out delicious,” he said. “I can tell you’ve got great taste,” he said, putting the jar in his small hand basket.
“You too,” you said with a gentle smile. “Only losers eat Prego,” you said with a grin.
“That’s a bold statement, Y/n. We need to make sure that Campbell’s Soup Company isn’t listening to our every word.” You couldn’t help but snicker, accidentally snorting at the stupid joke.
“Stupid joke?” he asked, reading your mind.
“Yeah, I gotta admit. It was a terrible joke,” you said, your cheeks aching painfully from grinning.
“Ah well, I’m known for them, so,” he shrugged, adjusting his basket in the crook of his elbow. “Well, I guess I’ll see you around, Y/n. If I see you next time, maybe we’ll compare ingredients again.”
“I’m ready for you,” Josh said. “I’ve known it’s you for a while now,” he admitted, reaching forward to take your hands in his. “I want to make it special,” He continued. “Let me make you dinner. You already know what’s on the menu, besides you, of course,” he said with a soft grin.
“Josh Kiszka’s world famous Spaghetti?” You said, eyeing him with a smirk.
“You know it!” He said excitedly. “Come here, let me kiss you.”
You obeyed him instantly, leaning forward into his awaiting embrace, letting yourself be truly loved for the first time.
You heard a buzz from your phone on the side table, but ignored it.
You’re a whore for going after the celebrities you write such filthy smut about. I’ve found you, and it’s only a matter of time before everyone finds out about your little secret. Could be fun, don’t you think?
End of part 1.
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oh, what a sin [iii]
iii. betrayals
pairing: danny x reader, sam x reader
a/n: ummmm ok this shit is an emotional rollercoaster. if u are sensitive like me i recommend lots of tissues ok i'm rlly good at making myself cry. i feel so bad for sammy lol. and it's all my fault!!! anyways, i am sorry this took so long i have been busy with work lately so it's taking me some time. also this is completely unedited so forgive me if there are any typos/mistakes. i hope you all enjoy. love ya <3
genre: angst!!! not full out smut but a lil bit.
word count: 4k
summary: the reader and danny have a heated moment. she admits their betrayal to sam.
warnings: angst, infidelity, sexual situations, swearing, etc.
A quiet breeze whispered through the open bathroom window as you relaxed in the bathtub; your feet hung over the edge, cooled by the late-afternoon air as you floated in the soapy water. Something about it was cathartic, your hair sprawled in tendrils around your face as you all but submerged yourself in the water. The sensory deprivation was exactly what you needed at a time like this, the water dulling all noise and your closed eyes blocking out most of the light spilling in through the open window. All that was left was the feeling of cool air caressing your skin, feather light. You were allowing yourself a few minutes to think about absolutely nothing.
Home alone again, you had quickly busied yourself earlier in the day with all of the household chores. You washed Sam’s ever-growing mass of laundry piled beside the hamper, took Rosie for an afternoon walk, polished the silverware, and when you couldn’t imagine another thing to possibly do, you dusted the entire house. Lately, you did everything you could just to distract yourself from the worsening situation of your love life. Tension seemed to bloom in your relationship. Sam was his usual sugar sweet self, but… it felt all wrong. Although you had done nothing wrong, your emotions were traitorous. You felt like a liar, a cheater. You felt tainted by the very situation fate dragged you into all those years ago.
Hooking your fingers over the side of the tub, you emerged from your little empty paradise. You leaned over the edge, resting your chin on your arms as you met the curious gaze of Rosie curled up in a patch of golden sunlight. She blinked at you, her tail wagging lazily as she waited for you to acknowledge her. The corners of your mouth curled into a lethargic smile. There was a dull plinking as a few drops of water trickled off of your arm and hit the gilded foot of the tub. Your eyes followed the drops, tracing their trail down the metal to the tiny pool of water gathering on the tile. Watching the drops, you suddenly felt so small, so insignificant. In the grand scheme of things, what were you but a drop of water gathering in the greater pool of life? It made you feel a little better. Made your situation feel less cumbersome.
You breathed a deep sigh, closing your eyes and resting your forehead against your forearms. “What am I supposed to do, Rosie girl?” you asked, voice echoing through the big empty bathroom.
It was quiet, save for the rhythmic thumping of her tail on the tile floor. You laughed softly at the ridiculousness of it all. What kind of advice were you seeking in the curious gaze of a dog? You shifted, planning on dunking yourself in the now-cold water once more before getting out, but a thump from down the hall disturbed you.
Rosie jumped to her feet, paws padding over to the closed door of the bathroom, blocking you both from the noise.
“Think dad’s home early?” you pondered, forcing your stiff muscles to lift you out of the tub. Your gaze skirted over the shower, mind briefly flashing back to the last time you’d been in there with Sam, wrapped in his embrace without a care in the world. You wished with everything in you that you could go back to that moment in time. Before you were driving yourself crazy with a million questions and possibilities.
Rosie whined as she waited for you to wrap a towel around yourself. Water trickled down your bare legs and left footprints on the floor behind you as you left the bathroom. A yawn left your lips as you languidly slipped down the hallway. There were a couple more thumps from Sam’s study, the door opened a sliver. As you approached, the sound of shuffling papers and movement became more apparent.
“Sammy, you’re home early,” you said, prodding the study door open with one toe as you peeked into the room. Your heart dropped into your stomach. It wasn’t Sam at all.
“What are you doing here?” you said, voice accusatory as you glared at the familiar face. It was Danny, looking disheveled as he dug through the mess on Sam’s desk. He glanced up at you, scoffing.
“Sam sent me,” he said, his voice cold. “Forgot his notebook.” He suddenly found what he was looking for, holding up the leather book. His large hands dwarfed the book, and you swallowed hard. Your mind painted a very good image of his hands dwarfing other things, things that you shouldn’t be thinking whilst standing before your boyfriend’s best friend in nothing but a towel.
A frown played on your lips as you wrenched your gaze away from him. “Why’d he send you?”
“He thought you’d be happy to see me,” said Danny, his tone dripping with sarcasm.
You huffed. This new version of him was not very likable; always angry, his tone and words constantly edged with venom since your encounter back in the guest room at the twins’ house. He was angry with you, but what did he expect you to do when he came in there to interrogate you? He took it as a personal offense that you somehow, miraculously had fallen in love with Sam, as if you had known all the while that they were friends and that you had done it on purpose.
“Aren’t you ever going to forgive me?” you asked indignantly. You tried to steady your shaking hands by gripping the towel tighter around yourself, trying to shield yourself from his sharp eyes.
“For what, Y/N?” He looked at you, his features expectant.
“For falling in love with him!”
For a second, he looked taken aback, blinking at you as if you had sprouted a second head. Anyone looking in on the two of you might think you were in some kind of peculiar staring competition, the both of you watching each other expectantly. You shifted uncomfortably under his gaze, your half-clothed state suddenly very apparent to you. On your shoulder, there was still the ghost of the bite mark Sammy left on you the week before. You watched Danny’s eyes trail over the mark after a moment, and saw his jaw tighten. His expression flashed dark with emotion, but he masked it quickly.
“How am I supposed to?” His words were barely audible, coming from between clenched teeth. Though the tension wasn’t visible in his face, his knuckles were ashen from holding the notebook so tightly. His posture stiffened.
“I didn’t do anything wrong,” you said, trying to sound stronger than you felt.
He nodded, finally breaking the intense eye contact. “I know that, don’t you think I know that?” He sighed heavily, clearly frustrated with you. You swallowed. What were you supposed to do, read his mind?
One of your hands twisted in the fabric of the towel. You tightened it around your fingers so hard that it hurt, anything to distract you from the feeling that your ribs were compressing your lungs. Closer and closer. Harder and harder to breathe.
“It’s the whole problem… How can I hate my best friend for having everything I want?” His anger and frustration finally began to color his tone. He wouldn’t look at you, but you could see his features pulled into an awful grimace. You hated seeing him like this. The compression in your chest grew worse by the second.
You didn’t speak. You had no clue what to say.
“How—how am I supposed to sit there and watch you two? See the way he makes you laugh, see him kissing you like it’s the easiest thing in the world?” He met your eyes again, and you saw the pain behind his dark gaze. Even through the jealousy, through the anger, there was the cloudy tinge of heartbreak lurking in his irises. He dropped the notebook on the desk, crossing the room to close the space between you. It took everything in you not to flinch back, afraid of what would happen if your skin dared touch.
His voice dropped to an almost imperceptible volume, one finger lifted to trace the crescent shaped bruise stained on your skin. “How am I supposed to see this, and act like I don’t care?”
You took a shaky breath. His touch sent tingles over your skin, sent goosebumps erupting all over your body. He was so close, you could feel the heat radiating off of him, permeating the space air between you. Everything about him was so familiar, those thoughtful eyes, the curls framing his chiseled face, the shape of his mouth. Even his scent was driving you insane, almost intoxicating you. The very air around you seemed to vibrate from the magnetism between you. Every fiber of your being was screaming at you to lean into him, touch him, kiss him. Squeezing your hands into tight fists, you shook your head.
“You want this as badly as I do, and we both know it…”
The finger tracing the bite mark on your shoulder trailed down, lower and lower… His touch left a burning trail in its wake, your body igniting as he approached the towel clutched between your trembling fingers.
“Danny–”
“You want me to stop?” His voice was a dark whisper, emotions tearing through his silken tone. You felt his hand trembling, too.
“Danny, I–”
“Tell me to stop,” you tasted his breath as it fanned over your lips. He was so close, so awfully, deliciously close to you. There was a second of hesitation, and then his lips were on you. One of his hands gripped you around the waist, bunching the towel up in a vice-like grip. His other hand threaded into the damp tresses of your hair, twisting the strands around his fingers.
You sighed with something like relief, the tension hanging in the air finally melting away and leaving you breathless. Your head spun, a thousand thoughts screaming nothing other than his name over and over again. Your brain wanted you to pull away, but your heart was pushing you closer to him, slotting your bodies together as if you were made for one another.
One of your hands grasped his arm to steady you, and your nails dug into the skin. He winced slightly, but you took no notice as he pushed you back against the door frame. The wood bit into the skin of your back, stinging. You grunted into his mouth, struggling against his grasp.
“Y/N, if you want me to stop–”
“Don’t fucking stop,” you muttered, intoxicated by his touch. You gripped the fabric of his t-shirt as if it were the only thing tethering you to the ground, trying to drag him closer. “Want this off,” you mumbled against his mouth.
He broke the kiss long enough to remove his shirt, before pressing himself back into you. His tongue pushed into your mouth carefully, slowly exploring, taking his time. You wrapped both hands around him, feeling the flex of his back muscles as he kept you pinned between him and the wall. You arched against him, hooking one leg up around his waist and rolling your hips against him. The drag of his jeans against your bare center sent a jolt of pleasure up your spine.
He was still kissing you, slowly as you grew more desperate for him. You needed him, now, before you had enough time to think about what you were doing. Before the guilt had time to settle in and make you stop. You had to know if it was the same as all those years before. If he was still the one to drive you mad.
As if reading your mind, his large hands found purchase on your thighs, pulling them up to wrap around your waist. He carried you easily to the couch against the far wall, letting you fall gently onto the leather. The towel shielding your body from view peeled open, exposing your bare flesh to him. His eyes dragged over your figure, drinking you in like a man stranded in the desert. His gaze flashed dark with lust, and his tongue darted out to wet his lips.
He dragged a finger over the curve of your cheek, over your swollen lips, down your clavicle, ghosted over one hardened nipple. He looked at you as if you were an art piece, your form masterfully sculpted and put on display for only him to see. He was memorizing every curve, every dip and hollow in your form. The look of tenderness in his eyes surprised you; the fear had been there all along that this was more than just lust, that the two of you shared more than just a physical connection. You had fooled yourself into thinking you only wanted him corporeally, when you knew he had you wrapped around his finger, body and soul.
There was the sudden feeling again that you were going to be sick, but his scorching touch distracted you from that quickly. His lips found purchase on your neck, placing sloppy kisses on the skin. You squirmed beneath him, heat having bloomed between your legs and quickly spreading up your spine. There was no way you could continue this at his pace; at this rate, he was going to be touching and teasing your body for hours.
“Danny, hurry,” you muttered, nearly breathless as one of his hands slipped between your legs. A gasp broke from your lips, your back arching off of the couch as he touched you as if he had practiced for this very moment for years. You melted under his touch, one hand lazily hooked around the back of his neck as he took care of you.
“Wanna take my time,” he said, words muffled against your skin.
“You–you can’t… What if S–”
“Sam…” He cut you off, his entire body stiffening as he pulled away from you. He leaned back on his haunches, wiping your arousal on the fabric of his jeans as he ran the other hand through his disheveled hair. “Fuck, Y/N, what are we doing?”
You gulped, abruptly aware of the situation you were currently in. The buzz from Danny’s touch had withered away immediately at the sound of Sam’s name. Shame bloomed over your features, and your face burned red hot as you struggled to cover yourself with the towel.
“I don’t know,” you said, voice high-pitched and nearly hysterical as the tears began to flow. He was right. What were the two of you doing? You curled into yourself, eyeing him carefully as he retrieved his shirt from the floor. You had just jeopardized all the good in your life for one encounter with Danny. Oh, how the past was coming back to haunt you.
“What do we do?” He asked you, sighing heavily.
You refused to look at him, staring at the bookshelves beside you. The tears burned your skin, flowing hot and landing heavily in your lap. You shook your head, your voice shaking as you replied, “I–I want you to go…”
His voice was hurt, but understanding. “You always do.”
Then, he was gone. You sulked off to bed after crying your eyes out. You hoped to fall asleep and wake up from this absolute nightmare.
The following weeks weren’t much better. With the guys all home from the tour, you were spending more and more time trying to avoid Danny. He seemed to gravitate towards your house, spending hours lounging around with Sam. You hid away in the bedroom, or the study when you weren’t at work, listening to them brainstorm ideas for the next album, or laughing over their dumb inside jokes. It was unbearable. You wondered how Danny could keep his composure in the house; something was mind blowing about how he was able to mask his emotions, putting on a perfectly happy facade as if he weren’t eyeballing you behind Sam’s back.
Contrarily, you were doing an awful job of hiding your internal conflict.
“Maybe you should talk to someone, sweets,” Sam said one night, after a particularly grueling night having dinner with a few friends, including Danny. You shook all night long, stuck in Sam’s side like a thorn that was just out of reach. He hadn’t uttered a single word of complaint, holding your hand tightly as if he were your anchor. He made sure you ate, even just a few bites, included you in conversations, and didn’t get annoyed at all when you asked if you could wait for him in the car.
Now, the two of you were finally home, curled up on the couch. You were half-dressed, his shirt and his shoes discarded by the door, while you wore only your slouchy denim shirt that you threw on for dinner. You curled your toes under his leg, warming them as you wrapped your arms around your legs and rested your chin on your knees. He watched you with a warm expression, too much tenderness saved for the likes of you.
“I don’t wanna talk to anyone,” you muttered, half hearted.
He looked at you with those puppy dog eyes, all soft and sweet. A slight frown played on his lips. “Not even me?” He raised an eyebrow.
You sighed heavily, turning your head so your cheek rested on your knee instead. You felt very suddenly like bursting into tears, but you held back. “Of course I want to talk to you, but…” A sharp breath fell from your lips, and you closed your eyes. You couldn’t bear to look at him.
“But what?” There it was again, that soft and gentle tone that you adored so much. That voice that made you feel like anything you ever did wrong would be forgiven. That tone, full of nothing but complete and unconditional love. You were hating yourself even more by the second.
“I’m scared… I’m scared it’s going to hurt you. I’m scared it’s going to hurt you, and you won’t love me anymore.”
He shifted, wrapping his arms around your curled up frame. You felt his lips press against your temple, warm and comforting. Then, his voice was quiet, “There is very little you could do to make me stop loving you, Y/N.”
A single tear slipped down your cheek, but he was already there, brushing it away. Your stomach fluttered at the touch; you reached up and grasped his hand, pulling it to your heart and cradling it there as if it were the only thing holding you together.
“What happened, sweets? Tell me so I can make it better, please,” his voice was pleading. “I hate seeing you like this… I want my girl back, my smiling girl…”
A weak sob wracked your frame, but his presence was grounding you. He was everything you needed. You were about to destroy that.
“Sam, I–” you choked on your own tears, trying so hard not to break down in front of him. “I don’t even know how to say this– I– I know it’s going to tear you apart…”
You forced your eyes open, meeting the worry in his gaze. You made yourself look at him; you deserved this, after what you had done to him. You should have to face the consequences of your actions.
“Y/N, please,” his voice was pleading, almost desperate.
“I–I kissed Danny,” you blurted, voice shaking so much that you could barely understand the words coming out of your mouth. “We had sex, years ago, before you and I met and– and I’ve had dreams about him for years, and I just… Well, I saw him at the party and it ignited all of these old feelings… Then he came over the other day to get your notebook and—” Your rambling was quickly drowned out by the sound of your own sobbing, your body shaking uncontrollably. You felt him pull away, saw the light in his eyes fade as you admitted to him your wrongdoing.
The look on his face was unlike anything you’d seen before; those tender eyes turned contemptuous, hurt staining them black.
“Tell me you didn’t sleep with him.”
You shook your head, practically hyperventilating. “No, no, not again…” Your voice was high, hysterical. “No, we–we stopped, before…”
“But you were going to.”
“Yes, I mean–No… I don’t know!” You buried your face in his shoulder, clawing at him, wanting him to just wrap his arms around you and hold you together before you fell to pieces. But his hands stayed limp at his sides, his breathing shallow.
“Sammy, I’m begging you to forgive me,” you sobbed. Your tears were rolling down his bare chest, soaking his skin. He was still silent. You cried against him for a moment, then pulled away to look at him.
You were torturing yourself; seeing that look on his face was tearing you apart. His eyes brimmed with tears, and he shook his head slowly. He still hadn’t budged from his seated position, and he refused to meet your gaze.
“Sam–”
“You understand that you’re the person I love the most in the world, don’t you?” He cut you off, finally looking at you. His tears began to fall, and his voice shook. You reached up with a shaking hand to brush the moisture off of his face.
“Yes–yes, I do,” you nodded desperately. You were all but sitting on his lap now, doing anything to be close to him. Your world was falling apart before your eyes; you never imagined you would see your Sammy like this, so distant and hurt. A black feeling settled in your stomach, making you sick.
“Then–” his voice cracked “--how could you do this to me?”
You crumbled beneath the look that he gave you. His eyes were red-rimmed, pouring tears, his nostrils flaring as he struggled to breathe. His jaw was clenched to the point that it looked painful. You reached for him, wanting to touch him, to soothe him, and he flinched away. A pang shot through your entire body at that. You felt as if you were being swallowed into a dark abyss. You would never know happiness again, not after this.
“Baby, please,” you breathed, your voice thick with tears. “You–you said nothing would ever make you stop loving me… Please, tell me it’s still true…” You were begging him, desperate for any inkling of reassurance.
He shook his head, swallowing hard. “How can you ask me that right now?” He huffed, wiping his tears with the palms of his hands. “I love you so much I can’t fucking stand it, Y/N… I’m not gonna lie to try and hurt you, even if you’re tearing me to pieces right now… I could never do that to you.” He said it with so much sincerity, so much love still in his tone that it made you speechless. You pressed a hand over your face, silently sobbing harder. You felt like you would never catch your breath, your chest tightening as you squeezed your eyes shut. You didn’t deserve him, you had never deserved him, and you were realizing that more by the second.
The two of you sat there, for what felt like hours. Turmoil bloomed in Sam’s face. You wanted to know what was going on in his head, but didn’t think you would be able to handle knowing. You didn’t dare reach for him again, afraid you would have to watch him wince away again. You couldn’t bear the thought of it.
“Do you want me to leave?” you asked after a while, your voice hoarse from crying.
He shook his head, barely looking at you.
“No, sweets. Just go to bed.” He nodded in the direction of the hallway. Your throat tightened at the sound of the pet name. You knew you wouldn’t get a wink of sleep, not without him beside you, but you did as he said. You would do anything he asked, if it meant he might forgive your transgressions.
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Reasons for Waiting
This was requested by my sister. You can blame her for the pain. *Based off of Dorothea by Taylor Swift.
words: ~1000
content warnings: sad, friends to almost-lovers to strangers
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“Hey, honey?”
“Yes, Daniel?,” you huffed. He knew you didn’t like him calling you that in front of anyone. Let alone his whole family, and all of the Kiszka’s too. Not that they could hear, you’re definitely out of earshot and he’s speaking low and slow.
“Are you gonna miss me?,” he sounds hopeful, but still so sad and small.
“Of course I will, Danny. I’m going to miss you every second of every day. That’s not even a question,” your hand found his, tangling your fingers together.
He was the lucky one. He was going to have constant distractions, being on the road and traveling the world, being around his brothers and meeting millions of… girls. You’ll be stuck here, back home in Michigan. Waiting around for him. It’s not like you could ever move on.
“We were so close, weren’t we?,” he’s got tears in his eyes now, to match the ones in yours.
“And so, so far,” you let out an unamused laugh.
“So far from where we wanted to be, but we still had a good run, right?,” he brushed a tear off of his cheek with the back of his hand.
“We did. I guess it wasn’t really a run, though. Since you never pulled the trigger,” you dropped his hand from yours, instead favoring to tickle his side a bit to make him laugh, before wrapping your arm around his back.
“You didn’t either!,” he laughed, tears still streaming out of his eyes. He lets a beat of silence go by, just enjoying the feeling of your fingers as they find the hem of his shirt and skirt underneath it to touch his warm skin. “Long distance would be a really, really tough way to start a relationship, honey. I don’t think either one of us is strong enough for that.”
“I know, baby. I know.”
“I wanted to give it all to you, you know? I pictured us getting an apartment out in Saginaw. Working some dead end jobs, just to make a life together work. I never pictured this. I never thought the band would actually make it,” he’s crying in earnest now, you are too. Chests heaving for breath, clinging tighter onto each other. “I almost want to just..”
“Daniel Robert, don’t you ever say that. Music means so much to you, and I would never allow you to throw it all away for me,” you had a hand on his face, making him look into your eyes. Sharing just how much hurt was hovering between the two of you.
“I know,” he mumbles, dropping his face into your neck and taking a shaky breath. “Look, it doesn’t have to be forever, right? I’ll wait for you if you’ll wait for me. Me and the boys, we can go to Nashville and get the band really going. Make some good money, and I can afford to support us both with it. You can move down there with us,” he knows he’s dreaming, but damn does it feel good to have a sliver of hope somewhere in his heart.
“Yeah,” you smile softly against his forehead, knowing it was a farfetched dream too. “I’ll always wait for you, Dan.”
You knew you meant those words. It’s not that he didn’t mean his too, but you weren’t naive enough to think that him launching a rock n roll career was going to keep him humble and waiting. You knew he would do his best to keep in touch, for as long as possible. It’d be a month, maybe six, maybe a year. But it would fizzle out. He’d make new, interesting, shiny, musician friends. You’d keep him as close as possible for as long as you could, though. Vowing not to waste a moment.
~
It was four months, one week, and 4 days.
He started out FaceTiming you every day, showing you his moving in progress into his and Sam’s apartment. Taking you grocery shopping with him so you could remind him what ingredients he needed to make that stir fry you always made him that he liked so well. Propping his phone up in the studio, just to feel your presence while he and the boys played, something they all seemed to enjoy — waving at you, asking you how you felt about a certain lyric, and of course Joshua asking you to take his side in every argument.
It shortened about a month in, to texts every day, but FaceTimes maybe once a week. Then those turned into empty promises of calls, and eventually around month three it was only sporadic texts. Albeit they were lengthy, filling you in on days or weeks worth of information at a time. Month four was when you knew it was going to end soon. You had seen the video a mutual friend posted on instagram, Danny in the back corner laughing and play fighting with a girl. You weren’t jealous, not even sad. You had known it was going to happen.
Above all else, you were ready for the end. To be able to finally let out the breath you had been holding onto for all these years. The boy that was never yours, who almost was, only when it was too late. One week and 4 days later you got text, assumably a drunken one.
“Just wanted to say thanks for always being there. You made my roots something to be proud of. I’ll carry a piece of you with me forever.”
You found yourself smiling as you cried, mourning the death of the friendship you had with him, but feeling so, so incredibly proud of the man you watched him become.
“If you’re ever tired of being known for who you know, you know you’ll always know me. I love you, Daniel.”
#danny#danny wagner#daniel wagner#daniel r wagner#daniel robert wagner#gvf#greta van fleet#danny wagner angst#danny wagner blurb#gvf angst#gvf blurb#greta van fleet angst#greta van fleet blurb
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only one | j.t.k
hey besties!! y’all it’s been a hot MINUTE
I hope everyone’s been doing good, getting some good sleep and drinking lots of water!
today’s post is brought to you by a conversation I had with a fellow grestie (shoutout grace ilysm 😚) and we were talking about Jake’s tummy and how we feel this is DEFINITELY something he would do with his partner so after I got done crying over the thought I wrote this and cried about THIS instead !
anyway I hope you guys enjoy, lmk what you think !
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You felt your cheeks attempting to fight against you, against the smile that was once again taking over your lips for what must have been the millionth time tonight. You couldn't help it, watching your boyfriend up on stage as he belted out into his solos, giving his all each and every second since they had initially taken the stage that night - it was breathtaking. No matter how many times you watched them play, you continued to fall more and more in love every night.
Especially with Jake.
Which brings you to now, standing in the wings on the right side of the stage, watching your man as he lifts his guitar up to his hip, hoisting it on there for support as his fingers all but shred the chords that hung on his guitar.
"Do it, Jakey! Do it!"
The sound of Josh's encouragement only made the crowd grow louder, and you couldn't help but join them, jumping up and down screaming out praises towards your boyfriend as you danced along to their performance.
Finishing his solo he danced his way back to his spot away from the edge of the stage, turning to you momentarily as he pointed his guitar at you, shooting you a wink as he continued to play. Playfully rolling your eyes at him, the smile never left your lips as you blew him a kiss, to which he accepted with a simple nod and a smile, before he turned back to the crowd.
The rest of the show came and went, and your throat felt raw from all of the screaming you did, much like every other night. You were a fan before you were a girlfriend, and that wasn't going to stop just because you were dating one of them. You were their own personal groupie, and you made sure to always let them know how well they did no matter what.
After show rituals always consisted of alcohol, and sometimes a game or two of pool. Tonight, a game or two turned into a game or ten, and the alcohol started off in small shots but eventually turned into multiple bottles on the table. One of you had to remain sober enough to drive the rest of the crew home, and normally it would be you or Danny, but tonight it fell on you.
"Okay," you sighed, putting the car in reverse. "Off to the casa."
You had just dropped Sammy off at his house, the last one of the bunch and now it was just you and Jake.
Jake let out a giggle, mumbling 'casa' to himself throughout the drive. You held his hand on the way, rubbing your thumb across the back of it until you pulled into your driveway. Killing the engine, you gathered your things and made your way to his door, helping him up and out and into the house.
Getting him in the shower was out of the question, so you opted for simply removing his clothes, leaving his underwear on as you tucked him into bed. Going through and getting yourself ready for bed, you snuggled up into his side not long after. Your fingertips began their trails at his neck, working their way down towards his throat, gliding over his pecks before settling onto his tummy.
He huffed a laugh as you continued exploring, wiggling around in your grasp a little.
You smiled into his side as you pressed a kiss into his skin, leaning your head back to look at him. "I thought you would've passed out the second you touched the bed." you joked, earning a sleepy smile from him.
"Normally I would've," his speech came out mumbled, laced with exhaustion and alcohol. "But not yet."
You hummed in response but didn't offer much else for a comment, instead tucking your head back onto his chest, bringing your attention back to his tummy. Traces of your fingertips turned into small strokes of your thumb against the skin, relishing in the hums of appreciation that sounded against his chest. You continued on this way for a while, cuddling and enjoying the warmth he had to offer.
"You know," you spoke after a while. "I really love your tummy."
Silence was all that could be heard as a response to your confession, save for the sound of his steady breathing and the hum of his heart. You wondered if he had fallen asleep, but just as you were planning on looking up at him, he spoke.
"You do?"
The sound of his voice, filled with hesitation and, what seemed like disbelief, sounded in your ears, and this time you did look up at him, seeing in his eyes that you were right of the emotions beneath his answer.
Since you had met him, you had always said without a doubt he was one of the few people you had ever met that continuously oozed confidence. You knew everyone had their moments of course you did, no one was perfect but if anyone could ever even come close to it, it was Jake. Though this wasn't the first time this particular insecurity came to light, what with all of the posts and comments about him on specific occasions during a show where his tummy would be more on display, it still shattered your heart into a million pieces hearing the uncertainty in his voice.
"Of course I do, love." you assured him, never once stopping your affections on his skin. "It's one of my favorite things about you, and I know I'm not the only one that goes absolutely feral when it's out while you're playing."
He tried not to smile, biting his lip and closing his eyes even but he failed, a light blush grazing the apples of his cheeks as you went on.
"I love watching you up there, shredding away on your guitar giving it your all, and when your jacket opens up and your tummy is out and proud and coated in sweat - dear God, Jacob." You closed your eyes for a second, your heart rate picking up at the mere thought of how he looks on most nights but fuck, his tummy was such a turn on for you and you cherished it just like you cherished every other part of him.
"Okay, okay," he laughed, causing you to open your eyes and look at him to find him already looking right at you. "I get it."
You shook your head. "I don't think you do, baby. The things your tummy, your jummy if you will, the things it does to me, I should be carrying a mop and a wet floor sign with me everywhere I go, cause damn!"
At this point he was laughing, full on belly laughing. Head thrown back against the pillows, eyes screwed shut tightly as the bed shook with his laughter. The sound was music to your ears, it was your favorite sound ever, the sound of him playing coming at close second. You watched in adoration, relishing in the sound of his beautiful laugh bouncing off the walls, feeling the familiar sting in your cheeks as a wide grin spread across your lips.
You don't know how long he laughed for, how long you admired him for, but eventually his laughter died down and he was pulling you in tightly, nuzzling his nose in your hair. You stayed like that for some time, letting him hold you and whisper his thanks into your hair, which you shook off because he didn't need to thank you for loving him, all of him. You would do it all over again in every life time, every universe, on every planet for fucks sake. You loved him, in his entirety and you would never get tired of telling him.
"You know," he started, pulling back and giving you a pointed look. "Your tummy is really cute too."
You couldn't help but laugh, a playful eye roll even slipping out. "Okay, now I think I'm ready for bed."
He stopped you before you could roll over, holding his hand under your jaw to make sure you were looking at him as he spoke. "I'm serious, Y/N."
The playfulness died down as you stared at one another, you waiting for him to continue and him wanting you to believe every single word that was to come out of his mouth.
You had dealt with body image issues in the past, since you were younger, and they had never really fully disappeared. They weren't as frequent as before, but they still lingered every now and then. Jake knew of this, and he was one of the main reasons why you weren't so affected anymore but on the days that you were, he was always there to help pick up the pieces.
"When I tell you I love you, that means all of you, and I mean it."
This time it was him rubbing random patterns against the skin of your own tummy, and you shivered at the contact as he went on.
"I would never lie to you, not about something like this. I know you don't see yourself the way I do sometimes, and though it's not okay I know you're trying, I see it and I can feel it and I'm so proud of you for not giving up on yourself. Everything about you is beautiful, absolutely everything. But one of my favorites since the beginning, is this," he spared a glance down where his hand was momentarily. "It's so comforting, and I have no idea why. I feared you might think that was weird or something so I always waited until you fell asleep to hold your tummy but seriously, Y/N, I adore this part of you so much." You couldn't help but let out a small laugh at the ending of his confession, trying to keep yourself from blushing but failing as you felt the heat take over your cheeks. "The way you see me, is the exact same way that I see you," he continued. "There's only one of you. One set of eyes, big beautiful eyes might I add. Once set of arms, one set of legs, one of you entirely. And there's only one tummy, just one. So while you have it, I ask that you try and love it the same way you love mine. The same way that I love it, and you."
You pulled him into a hug at that, hugging him against your chest so tightly.
You don't know how you had gotten so lucky, but you were so damn lucky to have him in your life, even more so to have the privilege of him loving you, and you loving him just as much.
All of him.
#greta van fleet#greta van fleet fic#greta van fic#greta van fleet fluff#greta van fleet angst#gvf#gvf blurb#jakekiszka#jakegvf#jake kiszka fanfic#jake x reader#jake kiszka fluff#joshgvf#joshkiszka#dannygvf#dannywagner#samgvf#samkiszka#sammykiszka
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dirty little secret . samuel f. kiszka
a/n: hiii this is my first gvf fic and ofc it had to be for my love, sammy <3 anyway, if you're reading this, thank you!! i'm a whore for angst so first fic had to be angst hehe hope you enjoy :)
pairing: sam kiszka x f!reader
wc & summary: {2.8k} in which your friendship with sam grows towards the bedroom, despite it all being kept a secret and your feelings growing more than you can handle.
warnings: swearing, mentions of sexually explicit activities, just general angst, kinda ahole!sam
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It wasn’t always supposed to be like this. Yet, here you were again – sat upright on the edge of another uncomfy hotel bed. Your bare skin exposed to the elements as what little of what you wore the night before littered among the room. His soft breaths filled the air, a sense of peace and calm for once with your usually rowdy best friend. The light of the alarm clock at your side blinked right back at you. 02:28. You shook your head, still some grogginess to your waking up, before finally standing up. Quickly slipping on your golden silk dress from the carpet, you began to make your way out from the god-forsaken room. Before you could get your hand on the handle, you caught a glimpse of what you were slipping away from.
Sam. Your heart burst at its seams, eyes staring and not being able to look away. He was supposed to be your best friend, going all the way back to your days of skipping classes in high school to get stoned out of your mind with a particularly charismatic, long-haired classmate. Starting from innocent hang-outs up in his childhood bedroom, it was a particularly jarring scene to realize the predicament the both of you have placed yourselves in. The linen blanket covering your best friend lay just barely below his belly button, leaving very little to the imagination. His arm was outstretched, laying on the side where you would have taken comfort in being wrapped up close to him. It almost seemed as if his fingers were curled up, beckoning you to stay the night, but you knew it was all in your head. Just like Sam’s potential feelings for you that were more than just a fuck every time he was in town were most likely in your head.
With a tear finally threatening to spill out, you whipped your head back to the door, gripping the handle as hard as you could. Just as you were turning the knob, a soft voice came from behind – one very capable of making your knees weak and induce a throbbing sensation between your legs.
“(Y/N),” Sam purred out, ever so softly. His voice was an addiction; one you knew nothing in this world could ever detach you from. You brought your shoulder up to your face, wiping the tears that were beginning to fall. All your feelings for your best friend were beginning to become too much for your heart and head to handle. You needed to get away from him. Before he could slur more lust-coated words at your heart, you ripped open the door and made your way out of the hotel, making a mental note to not look back or you’d end up back in his arms again.
A painful uber ride back to your place was soon welcomed by the silent stillness of your apartment. Throwing everything in your hands down on the floor, you didn’t care. As you stumbled into the retreat of your room, you managed to collapse on your bed, tears now beginning to reveal themselves fully. You wanted so badly to stay in Sam’s arms, sleep with him all the way into the afternoon, but you knew that was impossible. As sleep began to overcome all your senses, your thoughts wandered into how you even got here in the first place.
What started as a drunken makeout in a bathroom during the band’s welcome home party a year ago began a string of affairs whenever Sam would be back in your hometown. Your already present feelings for your best friend blossomed into love and desire for him, though it seemed nobody ever noticed. You were always the best friend, never the girlfriend. You watched from the bench as girlfriends and flings rotated through Sam’s arms, always wishing it was you to stay there. So, when it came to his lips and hands all over your body that fateful night, your mind became hazy, addicted to what can happen between the two of you guys. When it came to the awkward conversation the day after, Sam promptly reassured you that nothing changed between you both and that you were still his best friend. To say the least, your heart completely shattered, but at least he didn’t completely boot you out of his life. It wasn’t long after before you found yourself in his bedroom; this time, your legs over his shoulders as he hovered over you.
A deal had taken shape that day: you would get your fill of each other and you would be gone by dawn. Nothing more, nothing less. Nobody knew of the partnership created between the two of you. Things hadn’t changed: you still hung out with the boys when they came into town or when they flew you out for certain concerts. You were still the baby Kiszka’s best friend and that’s all you would ever be in all of their eyes. Sam had been surprisingly good at keeping your affair below wraps, relishing in the fact that nobody knew. He was all yours whenever he wanted you to be and his best friend whenever he didn’t need you. What he didn’t know was your ever-growing feelings that weren’t being taken care of. Although the deal wasn’t exactly everything you wished for, you knew it was the closest you would get to having Sam. To have his touch and attention on you, even for only hours at a time, was a mind-numbing pleasure only he could provide. You needed him and he needed you, albeit for different reasons. It was what made the deal work so well.
There were times you swore there was love, not just lust in his eyes whenever he was above you in bed. The times he would call you his sweet girl, wrapping his arms and holding you close to his own as he made you moan out his name. Times where after things were said and done, he would wrap the blanket around you both and nuzzle his face into your neck, leaving careful, delicate kisses. Times where his hugs would be tighter, longer than usual around his family and fans. There were so many moments in which your heart latched onto, convincing you that this could become more, yet Sam never pursued anything greater. You were petrified to lose him so you felt this cycle of best friend to fling was only reasonable in the greater scheme of things. But now, over a year after playing these games, your heart was becoming fed up. You were in love with this man. Being just a toy for him to use whenever he wanted was inevitably taking a toll on your wellbeing. You knew that you were going to have to tell him that you both needed to end whatever this was for the sake of yourself, as much as it killed you to admit it.
It didn’t fully hit you until finally being awoken in the evening to a series of knocks on your door. Wiping your eyes and taming your bed-head, you walked over to the door, pulling it open to reveal the one person you didn’t want to see. Your stomach churned as you looked him over, want instantly taking over your body. Sam adorned a neutral multi-colored geometric sweater that hung loose around his shoulders with some black skinny jeans and some sneakers to match. His long hair was put into a messy bun, with loose strands poking out every which way, making you want to just go up and run your hands through them. Some glasses that he rarely ever wore sat on his face, making him all the more handsome and weakening your brittle heart.
“You left these,” Sam blurted out, as he immediately dug out a lacy thong from his pocket. A blush instantly creeped upon your cheeks as you pulled Sam inside your apartment. You shut the door and snatched the panties from his hand, looking down to realize you were still in your dress from the previous night. With your brain still being cloudy from abruptly being woken up, you made your way to your bedroom, ignoring any more comments from Sam. You threw the underwear into the hamper, scolding yourself for forgetting them in your hasty escape. Before you could take off your dress, you felt Sam’s presence and as you turned around, he had his sweater pushed towards you, a white shirt revealing itself underneath. “Here, take it. I know you like this one.”
He was right. This was your favorite sweater, more so particularly on him. Another time to add to your collection of how sweet Sam could be. You took his offer and began to take off your dress, as he made his way back to your living room. Slipping the now oversized sweater on, you followed Sam to your couch, sitting as far away as possible from him. You grabbed a pillow, placing it on your lap, tugging at the ends that stuck out. The emotions were running high in your body, love and apprehension more than others. You couldn’t bring yourself to look at Sam, knowing that when you did, you would fall right into his arms and straddled on his lap like you always did.
“Why did you leave so early?”
“Why are you still here?”
Both of your questions awkwardly came out at the same time after some moments of silence. Immediately at realizing each other’s words, confused looks adopted themselves amongst your faces. At his question, confusion only spurred some anger, egged on through your recently evolved hurt feelings.
“What do you mean why did I leave so early,” You spat out, maybe a bit harsher than you had intended. “You know, I always leave before the sun is even out. That was our deal, wasn’t it?”
Sam stared at you, his eyebrows still furrowed together. He reached out to you, a gentle hand coming close to your elbow, before you pulled yourself away. You could’ve sworn you saw some hurt flash across his eyes, but who were you to believe yourself anymore.
“What has gotten into you? You left before I could even put my clothes back on.” Sam attempted to explain, but you weren’t having any of it. Your passive aggressiveness was only becoming more evident throughout the conversation.
“You act like I’m just supposed to stay and be with you all night,” You mocked. “Samuel, why do you even care? I have never stayed before, this is how it always has been.”
Sam looked taken aback by the usage of his full name, which you rarely ever used. You didn’t think it fit him at all and you, personally, hated calling him by his actual name. You preferred his nicknames and used those all throughout your friendship so the sudden change took both of you by surprise. He stared at you, an unreadable expression settling into his features. You knew you were instigating an argument and you knew better, but frankly, you were tired of this. You loved him and you couldn't settle for less anymore.
“I– Well, yes, but-” He stuttered over his words for a second, which only annoyed you further because you knew you were right and that he had no valid rebuttal.
“But what? Tell me. This is all it has ever been. I am not your girlfriend, Samuel. I am not obligated to stay and be at your beck and call whenever you want me to,” You interrupted, putting a great amount of emphasis on the word girlfriend to really hone in your point. This only confused Sam more, annoyance starting to take over as well.
“Girlfriend? What are you even talking about?” He questioned, shaking his head slightly. “(Y/N), are you okay?”
Your irritation only grew further at his questions, practically pulling the ends of your pillow out in frustration. Your mind clearly wasn’t working properly and you were thinking mainly with your emotions, instead of rationally. Standing up and throwing the pillow to the floor, you sighed heavily with verging tears.
“God, Sammy…” You began, a look of relief on his face at the name he was more used to from you. “I can’t do this anymore.”
From your confession, Sam’s face promptly fell. He stood up to be in front of you, taking a few steps closer and taking you into him. Immediately, you were swarmed with the comforting scent of his cologne and it was like all wrong washed away. Being in his arms was your home and all you needed when you felt on the brink of breaking. This was it, you could feel his love finally. All of the could have beens were finally becoming a reality and you let your mind become wrapped in this sick, sweet fantasy.
“My sweet girl,” Sam began, a sweet delicacy wrapped around his words. You could feel yourself falling into them, your tears being soaked up by his shirt and allowing him to hold you so close and dear. “We have something so good. Don’t think too much into it or else we’ll ruin it. We just have some fun, y’know?”
The intoxicating fantasy was shattered just as swiftly as it appeared. Your eyes shot open as your heart took a deep dive into your stomach. Pushing Sam away, you instantly put yourself on guard as he looked at you with some slight impatience as he realized his words struck a nerve again. The tears spilled over even more now as Sam stood there, staring straight into you.
“You asshole! I don’t want to be your dirty little secret anymore! I fucking love you!” You screamed at him. Anger and pain weren’t a good mix and you were unleashing all of it. “Could you never tell how much I adored you, Sammy? I need you, all of you. Not just on nights where you want my clothes off! I want to be the one to wake up next to you every morning, the one to kiss you after you get off stage, the one to travel around the world and be by your side all the time! I can’t just be your best friend or whatever the hell you even call this anymore. When was the last time we even hung out without you ripping my clothes apart within an hour, huh?”
Sam stood there, unknown emotions unreadable on his face. The words kept rambling on for you, gutting all of your feelings out and not being able to stop. By the end, you were sniffling harshly and aggressively wiping your hands on your face. The fact that he couldn���t even answer your simple question set you off completely, pursing your lips in a feeble attempt to stop crying.
“Did you ever want me as more than just your best friend? Do you even love me?” Deep down, you knew what his response would be, but you needed to hear it from him. You stared into his dark eyes, the ones you treasured looking into all times before this. Now, it was difficult to even look into them for more than a few seconds. Silence soon blanketed over the conversation. You could feel your heart thumping louder and harder than usual with your chest heaving up and down. You think you could see some tears forming in Sam’s eyes but you couldn’t be too sure as your sight was blurred from your own.
“(Y/N)...” was all Sam could mutter out. Maybe it was from the way he was short with your name, no sweetness in the way he said it. Or maybe it was the way he took a step back from you after your confession, his eyes averting looking into yours. No matter the reason, you just knew you had your answer. Sam Kiszka didn’t love you the way you loved him.
“Get out.” You snapped, not even letting him finish whatever he had to say. You were done and got what you needed. Sam hesitantly reached out towards you but you snubbed him, turning your back to him. “I said, get out, Samuel.”
Closing your eyes, more tears fell as you could feel his presence slowly dissipate. It was only after you heard the front door shut that you fell to your knees, sobbing. His sweater still being on you was only a cruel reminder of the intoxicating delusion you stirred in your head at the beginning of this partnership with Sam. You could only wish to be back in his arms and take back all that you said but you knew this had to be done. Still, knowing the truth didn’t comfort your broken heart nor did it change the fact that in Sam’s eyes, you were reduced to just a dirty little secret.
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#sam kiskza#sam gvf#greta van fleet#gvf#sammy gvf#sammy kiszka#gvf fic#gvf angst#sam kiszka x reader#sam kiszka imagine#sam kiszka fic#greta van fleet imagine#greta van fleet fic#greta van fleet angst#angst#sammystardust#sfk
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CAPITAL VICES | GREED
Greed: an intense and selfish desire for something
Masterlist
Pairing: Jake Kiszka x f!reader
Word Count: 14k
Warnings: SMUT 18+, unprotected sex, semi public sex, pretty public sex briefly 😭, quickies, fingering (f!receiving), sir kink, lots of dirty talk, touch of degradation, touch of praise, lots of flirting, teasing, cum play I suppose?, name calling, mentions of toxic relationships, brief mentions of abuse/abusive relationships, mentions of cheating, drinking, swearing, fluff, sorry if i miss any!
hi!! i got internet today and finally finished this up. so happy to get back into the swing of things. my second roommate finally moved in and life seems pretty okay for once. as always, enjoy, be kind, and don’t mind any grammar mistakes 🫶🏻 also this chapter is a wholeee lot, some fluff, lots of filth, and for once, not really much angst!! (Lightly edited too, my apologies)
😈: Call me?
The text tone rang through the air, immediately breaking your focus from the screen of your laptop. You read over the message a few times, hating that it immediately prompted a rush of emotion straight through you. It was despicable that he had so much power over you by simply existing, and the fact that he barely said a word made it all the worse. Perhaps the most incriminating notion of it all was that you were ready to drop everything you were doing in exchange for a moment of conversation with him. Instead of feeding into the temptation, you typed back a simple response.
You: Busy.
The read receipt immediately sold him out, letting you know that he was sitting in the chat awaiting your response. Somehow, he knew you wouldn’t comply. It was a tell tale story, him giving you an order and you doing whatever you could to ignore it. Eventually, he got his way, but you did always seem to put in a good effort. Within seconds, his name lit up your screen with an incoming call. You rolled your eyes, debating on whether to answer or decline. After a few moments of awkward staring, you hit the green button. Before you could even utter a greeting, he was already speaking.
“What’s got you so tied up that you can’t talk, angel?” He asked, the sultry tone immediately sending a wave of butterflies through your stomach.
“I don’t think that’s any of your business, Jacob.” You snipped, setting your phone down beside you on the table. After a moment of silence, the vibrations began again, showcasing his request for a video call. This time, he really did begin to get on your nerves. Reluctantly, you accepted. “You’re needy today.” You rattled off the astute observation in an attempt to get under his skin, but it did not seem to bother him. He remained silent instead of spewing out a counter argument, looking a bit tense as he studied the screen. “Christ, what is your problem?” You asked, propping your phone up against your laptop screen.
“What are you doing, sweetheart?” He asked again, relaxing once he’d recognized the familiar paintings hanging on the wall of your bedroom.
“Working.” You said, biting down on the inside of your lip as you zoomed in on the photograph you were editing. Your eyes flickered back to your phone, the sight of his face nearly knocking the breath from your lungs. “I, uh, I’m just working on some wedding pictures.” You found it difficult to keep your rigid exterior when your eyes connected with his, the soft brown immediately warming your cold expression. “Why the video call? Worried there’s another guy in my bed?” He let out a chuckle, but did not deny the accusation. You knew that’s exactly why he called, but he refused to admit to his jealous tendencies. Although there was no relationship between you two, it was quite apparent that the two of you were only concerned with seeing each other.
“It’s nearly six; why are you still working?”
“Just want to finish these up. I’ve had them for a couple weeks now, and I usually don’t like to keep them this long.” You explained, touching up the lighting in the background of the photo. “Someone has been distracting me.”
“I wonder who that is?” He smirked, happy for the recognition.
“Yeah, I wonder.” You rolled your eyes. “Is that why you called? Looking for some late night entertainment?”
“You always think the worst of me, darling.” He smiled, rustling with something off camera. “You look beautiful, by the way.”
“You know you don’t have to compliment your way into my bed.” You glanced at your phone, noticing his eyes lingering over you as you spoke.
“Maybe I just wanted to be nice.” He offered, knowing that his compliment had nothing to do with his desire for sex. You were both aware that all he had to do was show up and he would get exactly what he wanted, but it was more than that to him. He liked to call things as they were, and if that meant flattery in any sense, he was more than happy to dish it out.
“You? Being nice?” You raised an eyebrow, unbelieving that the compliment was without any deeper significance. Even after days full of sweet words, you still had difficulty trusting that he was sincere rather than doing all he could to keep you on his hook.
“Oh, shut up.” He dismissed you. “What are you doing in an hour?” Your eyes flickered to the clock in response to his question.
“Well, that depends if you mean exactly an hour from now. At 6:47, I’ll probably still be sitting here working, but at 7, I’ll be cozying up with a bottle of wine, wondering when you’ll come knocking on my door.” He laughed at your need for theatrics, finding your wit incredibly alluring.
“How about at 6:30, you have your hair done and put on a pretty little dress, and at 6:45, you answer the door and let me take you to the bar for a few drinks?” He offered, unwilling to take no for an answer.
“Why would I come with you to the bar when I can get drunk at home?” You questioned, already knowing that you would obey his wish and be waiting for him well before he arrived. It still proved plenty of fun to push his buttons, and you couldn’t resist. “It would be much more peaceful; I wouldn’t have to listen to you all night.”
“You’d love to listen to me all night, don’t fool yourself.” He brushed you off. “I know I’d love to listen to you all night.” His tone dropped as he added the second part, letting you know that conversation was not something he was expecting to come from your mouth by the end of the evening.
“Yeah, yeah, whatever.” You rolled your eyes. “Why waste your money on drinks when you can come fuck me right now?” You posed the idea, hoping that he might comply with the request so you didn’t have to waste time dressing up. It was a fruitless endeavor anyway, knowing that when he got his hands on you, the dress would be long forgotten and your makeup would be ruined.
“Because I’m going to the bar with my brothers, angel, and I’d really like it if you came, too.”
“That seems awfully domestic.” You muttered. “Meeting the family definitely isn’t my definition of casual.”
“It’s my definition of friends.” He argued. “Besides, you’ve already met Josh. I know you’ll have a great time.” You heaved a long sigh, saving your work and facing the phone fully. He gave you a smile when he noticed your attention was focused on him.
God, how he loved to be the center of attention.
“Then I’ll take you home,” he explained, making sure you were listening carefully “and I’ll fuck that attitude out of you, all night long.” Your cheeks dusted pink at his vulgarity. Although you had effectively said the same thing, it always seemed dirtier coming from his lips. “Sound like a deal?”
“6:45, Jacob. Don’t be late.” You warned.
“For you? Never.” He smirked, ending the call with no formal goodbye. You sat for a moment, shaking your head at the strength in which he affected you. Without any further debate, you closed your laptop and stood from your chair, making your way to the bathroom to hop in the shower.
It had been about three weeks since the fateful night at the bar left you tangled in Jake Kiszka’s web. Three weeks of constant certainty that the two of you would remain solely connected through intimacy but neglect any romantic feelings. It was working out well, but your excessive indulgence had been pushing boundaries of greed since the first night you met. Now, it was uncommon for you to spend a night without being immersed in him, whether than be at your own home or at his. Your bed smelled like him and his memory was embedded in the fabric of your pillowcases. And in your shower, and your kitchen counter, and even your living room furniture. There was no part of your home that was free from the mark of his memory, and even if you tried to convince yourself to hate it, you knew it was there to stay.
There was not a surface in your household that was free of his touch, and not a fiber of your being that was free of his deadly charm. He had a hold on you stronger than anything you had felt before, and it was welcomed, even if you refused to admit it to him. Jake’s company was fantastic, and the fact that you could indulge in it without worry of further commitment or heartbreak was comforting. He was not in love, and neither were you, and you were both content with the knowledge that you did not have the intent to be with each other in such a way.
He had become your friend despite your reluctance to accept it. On top of that, he’d become the very thing that haunted every thought and dream that crossed your mind. You were a woman gone mad, desperate for a hint of attention and begging for the grace of his hands. The concupiscent nature between you was near embarrassing to choke down, and the strength in which you felt for him was incomprehensible. You needed Jake in the same way a starving man needs food, and the pleasure that he gave you had long surpassed a need for survival; sometimes, it felt as though it was the very thing that your being was put on earth to receive. Pleasing him went hand in hand for all he gave to you, and you were fine knowing that the two coincided with perfect unity.
He was placed in your life for many reasons, and sometimes you believed none of them were good, but you knew that you would go to the ends of the earth to reward him for the service he provided you. It was a relationship built from sin, yet even the barren depths of hell could not scare you away from him, because an eternity filled with suffering would be worth the moment of euphoria you felt at his hands. He was the devil, and you were the worshipper that in turn, gave him all of his power. He would be nothing if you were not feeding in to him, but the chains that bound you to him were so tight that they had fused to your skin. It was a vicious cycle that both of you were aware of, yet cared little about freeing yourself from it.
Love, although not something that you wanted to admit to, seemed to be creeping up on you with the utmost of silence, trying it’s best to kill you before you ever noticed it’s company. You were not in love with him, and even when he was wrapped around you in the most intimate display, you still did not feel the emotion. But, just because you did not feel it, did not mean it did not exist. Love was everywhere, surrounding you at all times and existing within you even while asleep. It was not love in the traditional sense, and nowhere near close to the kind that made you want to get married and settle down with children. It was the love of his company, and the love of his sharp tongue and sweet words. It was present in the shared jokes and coffee in the morning after spending the night together (Coffee and lunch had become routine, because you did well to adhere to your no breakfast rule).
It was different than any love you had experienced before, because it was not the type that made you willing to sacrifice yourself on his behalf nor go insane trying to love someone who did not love you. It was enjoyment in his company, and the laughter that hung in the air. You loved him as a friend, and you were in lust with him as a person. You were not dependent on his help to survive, but you did not want to picture a life without him in it. He was a great companion, and a fantastic friend, but you could not seem to view him as anything more. You did not want to blame it on his character, because it was simply not true. Jake was fantastic, but it was your own personal issues and morals that stood in the way of anything further than casual sex. So far, despite your limited time apart, he hadn’t seemed to overstep any boundaries or push your limits. As far as you could tell, he was content with the same things you were, and he had no interest in anything more.
For now, it was a comfort to know the both of you wanted the same outcome, but perhaps it was the most dangerous thing of all. The only thing that was worse than one person falling unwillingly, was both of you falling unknowingly.
You climbed out of the shower, drying off as you checked the time on your phone. Once your body was free of any water droplets, you wrapped your hair in a towel and moved on to your closet. Your eyes scanned your wardrobe, landing on a cute little black dress. You slipped it on, settling your arms in the long sleeves and straightening the front. It had a plunging neckline, the bottom of it reaching just under your chest on your sternum. You searched your room for tape to hold the soft fabric in place. When you were certain it would not move, you fixed the bottom, settling it mid-thigh. You took a quick look in the mirror, content with your choice and ready to move on to makeup.
In the bathroom, you had a constant eye on your phone to ensure Jake wasn’t texting or calling. He hated to be kept waiting, and you liked him enough to not want to push that button. You ran a comb through your hair as you blowdried it, adding a few loose curls to the ends for some volume. With little time to spare, you dusted some eyeshadow over your eyelids and put some mascara on your lashes after dabbing on a touch of foundation. You picked through your lipglosses and rushed through the application after hearing a knock sound on your door. With a small smile on your face, you rushed to greet your company for the night.
When you opened the door, you nearly fell to your knees at the sight. Jake was dressed in all black, with similar clothes to the night you met him, but somehow he seemed even more beautiful than he did then. There was a chain dangling from his neck and a few rings on his finger, and of course, the familiar cocky smirk adorned on his lips. You began to realize that Jake would not be himself without it. “6:45 on the dot.” You noted, your brain finally catching up with the moment.
“Told you I’d never be late for you, angel.” He recalled, taking a long look over you. “Seems like we match.” He tried to hide the lustful staring, but his eyes were permanently fixated on the exposed skin on your chest.
“I guess so.” You said, your eyes just as focused on the unbuttoned portion of his shirt. The need you both displayed for each other was shameless, and it was the loudest thing in any room you entered.
“You look fantastic.” He said, taking a step forward and letting the door close behind him. When he did, you caught a strong scent of cologne that was unfamiliar to you. It was new, it seemed expensive, and it was so heavenly that it was difficult not to tear his clothes off right then and there.
“Is this what you had in mind for a pretty little dress?” You teased, giving him a smile.
“Even better than what I had in mind.” He corrected, snaking his hand to your hip and pulling you into him. He brought his free hand to your chest, gently running the knuckle of his index finger down between your breasts and stopping at the same spot that the fabric resumed. A shiver went down your spine at the light tickle of his touch, and your skin ignited with a fire that could not be contained. “All of this just for me, sweetheart?” His tone was low and gravely, overtaken by desire for you.
“Don’t be so full of yourself, honey.” You brushed off his claim, yet both of you knew the defence was weak. You dressed to impress him, and his eyes and hands were the only thing you wanted on you. “Maybe I just wanted to make a good first impression.” He raised an eyebrow at your statement, challenging you without saying a single word. You nearly faltered under the weight of his stare, but you remained strong despite your tendencies to submit to him.
“Your idea of a good first impression is dressing like a whore?” He questioned, but the harsh words did not match his stature nor his tone. It was incredibly playful, almost as if he was trying to initiate foreplay already. Your cheeks burned red at the statement, but you continued holding his unwavering stare.
“Worked on you, did it not?” You asked, a small smirk playing on the corner of your mouth.
“So you’re trying to get them into bed, too?” He did not lighten up on his intense gaze, but somehow you were just content that you seemed to catch his undivided attention.
“If I remember correctly, you were doing all of the trying that night. I wasn’t interested in taking you home.” You reminded him of his relentless efforts and your continuous rejection as if it hadn’t been playing on repeat in his head since it happened. His hand slipped to your ass, bringing you closer to him with a force that made your head spin.
“Are you trying to get yourself in trouble again?” He asked while his fingers pressed into the skin that was already bruised from the night before. The pain held little importance compared to the mess that was beginning to form between your legs. “Why is it so hard for you to admit that you want to look good for me?”
“Because I’d hate to fuel your ego any further.” You snipped, but your hand was in search of him, landing on his side as you attempted to pull him closer. “And I’m not a liar.” You were, but neither of you needed to point out the obvious.
“That’s okay, angel. You don’t have to say it. Your body does all the talking for you.” He loosened his grip, giving you a small pat on the ass. You couldn’t help the frown that took over your face as he began to pull away. He caught sight of your expression, pausing for a moment as a glimmer of joy filled his eyes. “So that’s what it is,” he muttered, his gaze flickering to your lips. “You were hoping to piss me off enough so I would fuck you before we left.”
“No,” you shook your head, rejecting the idea even if he hit the nail straight on the head. He gave a low chuckle, leaning down and pressing his lips to your own. Your eyes fluttered closed, finding your prior arguments ceasing to exist within seconds of his touch. When he pulled away, the smile had returned to your face as if it never left at all.
“I missed you, sweetheart.” As domestic as the statement was, you couldn’t argue with it, for you had missed him just as much.
“I know.” You hummed. You did not have to say it back because he knew you did, too.
“Get your stuff so we can get going.” He ordered.
“Pushy,” you muttered, but turned to do as he asked.
“The faster we get there, the faster we can come back here.” He explained, watching you intently as you walked away from him. He was already itching to get that dress off of you, and it was no secret. You could see it in his eyes.
“Could just stay here.” You offered, calling out from your bedroom. You weren’t opposed to meeting his brothers; far from it, really. You quite enjoyed Josh’s company when he showed up unannounced at Jake’s apartment, and you could only assume you’d get along just as well with the others. What you did like more than drinking was the sex Jake had to offer, and you knew sitting tipsy in a bar booth was nowhere near as enticing as having him alone in your bed.
“You don’t sound very excited.” He noted, holding his hand out for you to grab as you walked out of your room. With little hesitation, you slipped your own into his and flicked the lights off.
“I am excited to meet them, but more excited about what comes after.” You corrected, pulling your keys out to lock the door behind you.
“Trust me, angel, if you’re good for me tonight, I’ll be good to you.” You nodded, knowing that he wouldn’t lie to you about that. As for being good, you weren’t sure if you could uphold the standard, especially to his expectations. Holding your tongue had never been a strong suit for you, but you could definitely give it a shot.
“So what do they think we are?” You asked, letting him guide you to the passenger side of the car. He opened the door for you, allowing you inside. Once you were settled, he closed it and got in the drivers seat. “Do I have to pretend that we’re in love, or do they know what we’re doing?”
“Sam and Danny think that we’re friends.” He chuckled, starting the car before looking over to you. “Josh only knows better because he saw you in my apartment.”
“Ah, so I’m a dirty little secret?” You raised an eyebrow. He smirked, giving a shake of his head as he slipped his hand to your thigh. You rested yours on top of his, hoping that he would keep it there for the whole drive.
“No, sweetheart.” He said, backing out of your driveway and into the road. “I just wanted to avoid them having any impression of you in their heads before they met you.”
“What does that mean?” You questioned, looking out the window as he drove.
“That means,” he paused, turning up the radio only slightly “you’re more than just someone I have sex with. I didn’t want them to know you as that, because you have way more to offer.” You couldn’t deny the tugging of your heartstrings as he spoke, finding his response genuine and sweet. “I don’t want them to like you because they feel like they have to. I want them to like you because they got the chance to know you like I do.”
“No pre-existing conditions,” you whispered “thank you, Jake.” Instead of a verbal response, he gave your leg a light squeeze. “You must bring home some interesting women if you’re scared they’re going to feel required to like me.”
“Why do you think I don’t date?” He quipped. His tone was light, but it didn’t seem like he was joking. For a moment, you felt like you could see straight through him. For another, you felt like you could relate to him. You did not know how to respond, so you didn’t. You were not in the game for comfort or therapeutic measures, and neither was he.
As you looked out the window, a strange feeling washed over you. You did not know Jake nearly well enough to be so entranced by him. You had pegged him as a whore without really knowing who he was, and you had built your walls up so high that you could not see over them for long enough to understand Jake for what he truly was. He did not seem to want a relationship with you, but he did want to be involved with you, and so much so that he hadn’t let you forget it since the minute he walked into your life. It did not appear that he was entertaining anyone else, and in truth, you did not fear he was simply because you knew he did not have the time. Between working, texting or calling you, or being with you, he seemed pretty preoccupied. More than that, he seemed content. In some strange way, you were, too, and one of the biggest problems you had with dating had already been conquered without you even realizing it.
Jake was integrated in to your daily routine so well that it almost seemed empty without him, and it was not in the negative way you perceived it to be in the beginning. He was a positive addition to your routine rather than a distraction, and he did not interfere with the things you believed he might. When you found clothes he forgot, you washed them and folded them alongside your own to return to him at a later date. He watched whatever you put on the television without a complaint, and offered you new music rather than forcing it upon you. He took up space in your bed, but did not impede on your own. He did not keep you up at night by snoring or stealing blankets, and often times, you slept better with his lazy arm slung over you. You did not want to wed him, but he had certainly proven that he was not a waste of your time.
Denial is a stage of grief, after all, and grieving your former self was all you had been doing as of late.
“What’s your favourite color, Jake?” You asked, looking back over at him. He glanced at you from the drivers seat, eyebrows furrowed in confusion as he processed your question.
“What?” He laughed, still unsure of your words.
“Your favourite color.” You repeated as if it was a completely normal inquiry.
“Uh… red, if I had to pick.” Fitting for the devil, you thought.
“Okay.” You nodded, looking back out the windshield.
“Why do you ask, sweetheart?”
“I guess I just feel like I don’t know enough about you sometimes.” You explained, feeling a small spark of embarrassment ignite in your chest. “We spend so much time together and I don’t even know your favourite color or which brother is your favourite, or anything like that.” He let out another hearty laugh at your words, finding your desire to know more about him intriguing.
“So you want to know me, now?” He asked, surprised that you were asking questions first.
“We’re friends, are we not?” You snipped, your tone sharp and defensive.
“I’d like to think so, but you seem to disagree.” He chuckled. “Ask me whatever you want angel, and I’ll answer.”
“Whatever I want?” You raised an eyebrow, wondering if he realized the extent of his promise. He did not try to take back the claim. Instead, he nodded his head to show you he was being truthful. “Okay, I guess I will, too.” Although begrudgingly, you thought it was only fair to be open and honest with him if he was willing to do so with you.
“What’s your favourite colour?” He asked, curious himself.
“You’re pushing it.” You warned, a smile on your lips to show you were joking. “Green. Dark forest green, like the way the trees look when the sun has just set.”
“Good to know.” He said, making sure to store the information in his mind.
“Do you do this often? Or am I just one of a kind?” You finally spewed out the most pressing question in your head.
“No, you’re one of a kind.” There was no room for doubt in his answer, because his tone was laced with utmost certainty. “I’ve never done this before, actually.”
“So why am I so special?” He looked back over at you, studying your face as he formulated a proper response.
“You’re different than anyone I’ve ever met.” He started slow, trying his best to word it properly. “I don’t like dating, and I don’t like commitment all that much, but I liked you from the minute I saw you. I wanted you, but for some reason, I wanted to know you even more than I wanted sex. I didn’t want to leave in the morning and never see you again.” He said, focusing on the road as he spoke. “I figured I’d shoot my shot and if you turned me down, no harm no foul. Then I started talking to you, and I knew there was no way I was walking away without you. Your snarky little comments and your sarcasm was impossible to ignore, and your lack of interest was just making me more interested. You had a comeback for everything I said, and I don’t think I’ve ever met anyone who I clicked with like that.” He shrugged. “The sex was mind blowing, and you get along with Josh really well. Was kind of a no brainer for me.”
“Oh,” you nodded, feeling your cheeks warm with another blush. You hated that you always seemed to be blushing when he was around. “I, uh, I don’t like that stuff either, and I really don’t like one night stands, but I liked you too. I’m pretty stubborn, and I think I just assumed you were lying to get what you wanted.”
“S’okay.” He gave your thigh another squeeze. “I get it. People suck.”
“Yeah, they do.” You agreed. “I told myself a long time ago I would never date anyone again, and I still feel that way, but I do like you and I like what we’re doing.”
“You don’t have to tell me about it if you don’t want to, but I’ll always listen.” He promised, pulling into the parking lot of the bar.
“It’s not a very long story, but I wouldn’t want to bore you with it.” You shrugged.
“I’ve got all the time in the world.” He assured you, putting the car in park and turning his attention towards you. When you caught his eye, it was astounding how much care was held in his gaze.
“I’ve gotten my fair share of strange looks and whispers around town for the last few years.” You explained. “Usually when you’re divorced before 25, people talk. At 22, it was even worse.” He did not change his expression, nor did he make a move to speak. He was listening, and he knew he would listen to you until long after the sun came up with no judgement and no interruption. In the three weeks he’d known you so intimately, never had you mentioned a word about your past so bluntly. He was desperate to know you, and he felt lucky that he was even getting the chance.
“I was stupid, and I married my high school sweetheart. At eighteen, he bought a cheap ring at the nearest pawn shop, and I wore it proudly, just like it was the most expensive diamond in the world. By nineteen, we were moved in to a shitty house in the poor part of town and I had his last name. Life wasn’t glamorous, and it certainly wasn’t easy, but I was happy. I worked part time as a server ay diner off the highway and made the rest of my money taking shitty pictures off my dad’s old camera from the 90’s.” You said, looking down at his hand burning into the skin of your thigh. It looked prettier on you than your ex’s ever did, and even in the short time you knew him, you knew that for certain. “When you’re that young, you don’t listen to anyone. No matter how many times I was told I was making a mistake, I didn’t listen. Kids never do.”
“What happened, angel?” He asked, noticing the disdain growing in your eyes.
“People change.” You finally looked up to meet his eyes. “Sometimes for the better, but most of the time, it’s for the worst.” You weren’t sure why you felt so comfortable telling him everything, but you didn’t feel the need to hide anything from him, and you knew that no matter what, the story would be safe with him. “By twenty, he’d already slept with half of the women in the neighborhood; it didn’t seem to matter if they were married too. If anything, I think he liked the thrill more than he liked getting off. Before I turned 21, he stopped saying I love you and turned to fists and raised voices. I was lucky that my sister opened up her spare room to me when I finally found a way out, and I was even luckier that he had a good job and lots in his savings account when I took him to court. I got a restraining order and changed my name, and bought a house on the other side of town with the money I got in the settlement.
“I had no idea, y/n.” He said, a spark of sadness showing in his eyes.
“Of course you didn’t. I’m not that person anymore, and I never will be. I don’t talk about it because it’s not who I am, and it’s not something that holds any value anymore. I changed, and I got over it; it was five years ago, but I don’t date anymore because I don’t think I could ever give anyone any power over me again.” You were lying through your teeth, because you knew he held a power over you, even if it was not romantic. Your strength astounded him, and as much as he wanted to voice his willingness to protect you for the rest of his life, he knew you did not need it. You seemed like you had more strength at 27 than he could ever comprehend in his lifetime. “It doesn’t change the person sitting next to you; I’m the same as I was the minute before I opened my mouth, and I don’t want you to think differently.” You took in a long breath. “Friends know each other, Jacob, so don’t ever doubt our friendship again. You know more about me than most of the world.”
“Understood.” He smiled. “Friends it is then, angel.” He was estatic to finally hear the words come out of your mouth without hesitation.
“What about you, then? Dating isn’t your game either, so I hope your story isn’t as tragic.” You joked, trying your best to lighten the mood. The tension was heavy in the air, and unlike usual, it was not sexual in any way. The weight of your confession was crushing the both of you, and you desperately wanted to change the subject.
“No, not quite.” He chuckled, understanding that you wanted to joke your way through the hurt. “Cheating takes a toll after a while, and I guess lots of people find it a fascinating hobby.” He explained. “After it happens so often, you get sick of pouring your heart into someone who doesn’t really give a shit in the end. I dated a girl for a very long time. We met not long after I graduated and we stayed together until about a year before I moved here. Loyalty wasn’t her thing, and I think I was too blind to see her for what she was. The guys hated her, but love makes you stupid.”
“That it does, Jacob. That’s why I don’t do it.” You said. “I value my sanity far more than I care about being alone.”
“Right,” he nodded “I spent a few months heartbroken, and then I just stopped caring. I had a few one night stands, but I didn’t really like it. Sex is fun, but when you told me there was no point in getting to know someone only to try and forget them in the morning, I couldn’t have agreed more. When I met you, and you felt the same ways I did, and you understood that sex is different than a relationship, it was like a breath of fresh air.”
“It was.” You agreed. “I like being friends with you, Jake, and I really like having sex with you, but that’s why I was so stern about not falling in love. I’m not ready for it, and I probably never will be.”
“I get it, and I feel the same way.” He sighed, happy to know the truth about the situation.
The only unfortunate part of the truth was that it did nothing but open the next door that was in the way of falling for each other.
“I’d like to know you, Jake.” You admitted. “Really know you, like more than what we’re doing now.”
“I’d like that, too.” He smiled.
“Still no breakfast, of course.” You informed.
“Of course not. Wouldn’t dream of it.” He laughed, genuine happiness radiating from his features. You felt a flutter of warmth in your stomach, finding yourself almost too excited to see him happy. “Would you like to go inside?”
“Yeah, sure.” You nodded, unbuckling your seatbelt. He got out of the car to open the door for you, holding your hand as you steadied yourself on your feet. When he was certain you had your balance, he slipped a loose hand to your lower back. “I’m excited to meet them.” You assured him, knowing that he had fear of you going because it felt obligatory.
“Good, I know they’re excited, too.” A small smile crossed your lips as he opened the bar door for you, allowing you inside first. When he stepped in beside you, his eyes drifted across the filled booths. Ray caught sight of you from the bar, sending you a wave as he studied the sight before him. Not once in the last five years had he seen you walk in the bar with someone by your side, but he was happy to see the smile on your face. Usually it was hard to get one out of you until you were a few drinks deep.
Jakes eyes landed on a familiar face and he began guiding you towards your company for the night. You drew in a deep breath, settling your nerves as you tried your best to convince yourself the night would be good. “Hey!” An excited voice called out. The familiarity was nice, and you looked to meet Josh’s eyes as Jake pulled up a chair at the end of the booth. “I was beginning to think you’d never show up.”
“Sorry, that was my fault.” You chuckled. “I was caught up with work.”
“No need for apologies, you’re here now.” He assured you. You looked to the other side of the booth, catching the curious eyes of two more boys. You gave a warm smile, extending your hand out to shake theirs.
“Hi, I’m y/n.” You said, shaking the first boys hand.
“I’m Danny.” He smiled, his eyes lingering over your face. He seemed sweet, and you didn’t even need to talk to him to sense his kindness. It was radiating from him. You did the same with the next boy, already knowing who he was without him saying his name. If you ran into him on the street, you were certain you’d recognize him. He looked so similar to Jake that it was nearly alarming.
“And you’re Sam?”
“So he’s told you about me?” You had to laugh at the similarity between his statement and the one Josh gave you when you first met.
“Only good things.” You promised.
“I can say the same.” He grinned. “I hear you play piano?” He raised an eyebrow, curious about the fact.
“You heard correctly.” You nodded. “My mom thought it would be a good way to keep me busy, and she was right.”
“I’d love to hear you play sometime.” He said, genuinely curious.
“I’m sure we can arrange something. I hear you’re quite talented, too.”
“You should come to our next show.” Josh offered, cutting in with his grandiose idea.
“I’m sure she has better things to do.” Jake chuckled, rolling his eyes at his brother.
“No, I’d love to, actually.” You shut his notion down. “I haven’t even heard him play yet, so maybe we could kill two birds with one stone.” Sam nearly choked on his drink at your words, looking over at his brother with wide eyes.
“He hasn’t played for you yet?” He asked, looking back to you. “I have a hard time believing that.”
“Guess we just never got around to it.” Jake said, sheepishly rubbing the back of his neck while he hoped they would drop the subject.
“Are you nervous?” Sam asked, even more baffled than he was before.
“No,” he snapped, shutting him down. “Quit it.” You chuckled at the altercation, finding their banter funny. Seeing them so close and comfortable with each other made you miss your own sister. She had moved a few towns over the year prior, and you hadn’t seen her much since. Sam seemed to back down at his sharp tone, settling back in his seat while he sipped on his drink. “Do you want a drink?” Jake asked you, prompting you to sit down beside Josh in the booth.
“Yes, please.” You smiled, following his order. Jake nodded, already knowing what you wanted. He hadn’t managed to forget a single thing about you since you first met. Sometimes, it felt like the knowledge plagued him and he would die from the sickness of needing more.
“So, y/n.” Sam said, watching as Jake disappeared from sight. “What do you do for work?”
“People pay me to take their picture.” You explained. “Weddings, maternity, cheesy family portraits, all that fun stuff.”
“Ever do photography for a band?” He asked.
“No, but your brother has been trying to convince me to do your promo shoot for the new album.” You admitted. “It seems like it would be fun, but I don’t know if I’m what you’re looking for.”
“Don’t say that.” He scoffed. “I’m sure if Jake is okay with it, you’re more than fantastic. He’s pretty picky when it comes to band stuff.”
“Oh yeah?” You asked, intrigued by his words.
“Yeah,” all three agreed, the response heavy. “The whole music thing was his dream, so he’s pretty specific. He must like you a lot.”
“Oh.” You cheeks tinged red again, almost flattered that he thought highly enough of you to want to work with you. “Who knows, maybe he can talk me into it.” You shrugged. “So you’re the bassist and he’s the drummer?” You asked, pointing to Sam and Danny for their respective roles. They nodded, confirming your words. “That’s cool that you all get along so well.”
“It’s tough by times.” Josh admitted, not willing to pretend it was always sunshine and rainbows. “Do you have any siblings?”
“Yeah, one. She’s only a year older than I am.”
“So you get it.” Sam chuckled.
“I do. She’s my best friend, but we do hate each other. Just part of the sibling relationship, I think.”
“Exactly.” He nodded. With that, a drink was sat in front of you and Jake took a seat in the chair at the end of the table. He gave you a small smile as you thanked him, but moved on quickly. “Water for you? That’s new.”
“Driving tonight.” Was all Jake replied, uncaring about having to stay sober. Getting you home safe was his only priority.
The group descended into small talk, starting first by trying to get to know you, then slowly moving on to joking and laughter. It was nice feeling like you fit in straight away, and during the entire night, you never felt out of place. Jakes brothers were arguably easier to get along with than him, and you were happy you hadn’t shied away from the invitation. For once, company seemed to make your night all the more memorable rather than put a damper on it. You found the boys fun to be around, and you could not remember the last time you laughed as much. Somewhere between drink three and four, Jakes hand slipped to your knee underneath the table. You barely paid any mind to it, and if anything, it was welcomed. You could never seem to convince yourself to disregard his touch, and often times found yourself searching for it.
The group joined together and purchased some shots for the table, which only began a gruelling game of quarters. The tension was high and the competition was fierce. Josh and Danny started, then you and Sam went head to head. Even though Jake wasn’t drinking, he stepped in for a few rounds, which eventually landed Josh in the chair at the end of the table and Jake taking post in the booth next to you. The innocent hand on your knee steadily grew more comfortable, which then provoked him to move his fingers further up your thigh. His touch was searing, and quickly turned into the only thing you could focus on. You were stuck on the inside of the booth, knowing that you would not be able to step away to calm yourself down unless he allowed it.
In essence, you were trapped, but it was not striking a fear within you; instead, there was an excitement to see how far he would take things before he backed away.
When Sam and Danny found themselves in an argument with Josh over something so small and trivial that you had missed it entirely, you felt Jake’s hand sneak even further up your leg. He settled his hand under the hem of your dress as his fingers were nearly brushing against the fabric of your underwear. Your breath caught in your throat, but you could not deny your desire for him to keep going despite the very real possibility of being caught. It was always the same with him; no risk was too high, because the reward would outweigh the risk any day.
“Jake,” you whispered, glancing over at him through the corner of your eye.
“What’s wrong, beautiful?” He asked, his expression nearly fooling you into believeing he was doing nothing at all.
“Behave.” You warned, but you were hoping he wouldn’t listen. He never did, and you weren’t truly expecting him to, anyway.
“What ever do you mean?” He smirked, turning his head down towards you ever so slightly. With a little help from your own neediness shining in your eyes, he managed to push your legs apart just enough to run his finger over your clothed cunt. You let your eyes flutter closed, trying your best to keep a straight face while he continued on his torment. He took in a long breath, nearly feral at the feeling of the arousal pooling between your legs. Your departure was long overdue, and he had been waiting to get you out of the dress as soon as he showed up at your door.
“You guys want to play a round of pool?” Sam asked, his attention suddenly on the two of you. You opened your eyes, trying extra hard to make sure your expression wasn’t giving away the incriminating act Jake was doing under the table and out of sight.
“What do you think?” Jake asked you, clearly trying his best to push you to the limit. As he asked, his touch grew stronger and more pronounced, focused intently on the thin lace that was covering your clit.
“Sure, why not?” You breathed, hoping that a quick answer would divert the attention away from your flustered expression. “I suck though, I’ll warn you now.” You gave a nervous laugh through clenched teeth, trying your best to ignore Jake’s antics.
“You okay? You seem a little… distant.” Jake pressed, hoping you might crack under the pressure.
“Yeah, think I just drank too much too fast.” You brushed him off, now determined to prove him wrong. “Might take a little break for a while.”
“Wouldn’t want you getting sick.” He sympathized, although clearly fake and only offering the statement to keep you in the position for as long as possible.
“Of course not, I’ll be alright.” You said, holding his gaze. There was a fire in his eyes, dangerous and mischievous, and yours were pleading with him to surrender. You were caught in a stalemate, neither of you willing to back down, yet neither of you able to win.
“Shall we play?” Josh asked, also seemingly invested in yours and Jake’s staring contest.
“Sure, just give us a minute. We’ll meet you over there.” He assured them, not looking away from you as he spoke.
“Okay.” They agreed, sliding out of the booth and making their way towards the pool table. Once they were out of earshot, you opened your mouth to speak.
“You trying to get us in trouble, Jacob?” You scolded, noticing that he still failed to withdraw his hand.
“No idea what your talking about.” The smirk on his lips was infuriating, but what even worse was how badly you wanted to lean over and kiss him. The devil made his presence known in the inviting warmth of his brown eyes, falsely claiming peace and serenity despite the invitation being nothing but filthy underneath the surface. “What’s wrong, angel?”
“Don’t play dumb with me,” you scolded, but could only care about his finger that had dipped underneath the fabric he had been teasing you through.
“Jake,” you hissed, but it was not with discontent.
“If you give me a kiss, I promise I’ll behave for the rest of the night.” He informed you, watching your lust clouded eyes with a type of longing you could not begin to comprehend.
“A kiss? That’s it?” You questioned, squirming underneath his stare.
“Yeah, haven’t gotten once since we got here.”
“Because your brothers think we’re friends!” You argued.
“Think that jig was up a long time ago.” He laughed, finding his power over you near comedic.
“Christ, kiss me then.” You rushed out, nervously watching to make sure nobody had picked up on your obscene display. He leaned down, pressing his lips to yours in a sweet exchange. It was nowhere near the same intensity of what he was doing beneath the table. As he pulled away, so did his hand. His promise was kept, and you finally felt like you could take a full breath of air. “You are needy today.”
“Get over it.” He gave your thigh a squeeze, humour laced in his tone. “Let’s go kick their ass in a game of pool.” You nearly had whiplash at the sudden change in direction, but you couldn’t seem to find it within yourself to be upset with him. He extended his hand out for you to grab, helping you to your feet as you straightened out your dress.
“I told you I suck at pool.” You warned, praying that he didn’t get his hopes up.
“Even if we lose, I still consider it a win if I have you as my partner.” You thought your face was going to ignite in flames from the intensity of the blush on your cheeks. He led you towards the rest of the group, keeping a steady hand on your back so you didn’t stray too far from his side. When you rejoined the rest of the crowd, you realized they barely noticed the length of your absence, too busy hitting balls aimlessly across the green velvet of the pool table. As you watched Sam line up a shot, you realized that you might actually have a chance at winning. He seemed worse at the game than you, if it were possible.
“Good thing they don’t pay you to play, Sam, cause you’d go broke.” Jake said, watching a striped ball bounce of the side and crash into the 8 ball, sending it straight into the corner pocket. You giggled at the sight, watching Sam shoot his brother a glare as he straightened up.
“I’d like to see you do better, then.” He held his arm out, prompting Jake to grab the cue. He obliged, taking a long look over the table before settling on a solid ball. He lined up his shot, and with one swift moment of his arm, the white ball knocked the blue one into a side pocket. With a cocky smirk, he handed the cue back to Sam, rejoining you without saying a word. “Show-off.” He muttered, fishing the balls from the pockets and racking them in the middle of the table.
“Just admit you suck.” Jake laughed, pulling you into his side even further without even realizing it.
“You just want to impress her,” Sam snipped. “Let’s play, then we’ll see who sucks.” Jake opted not to respond, but he went to the rack on the wall and grabbed a cue for himself. He motioned for you to pick one for yourself, which you did with great hesitation. If Jake thought Sam was bad, he certainly wouldn’t be pleased with your performance.
“You’re up first, sweetheart.” He said, gently nudging you towards the table. You let out a long exhale, taking a step towards the table and bending over to line up the cue with the ball. From behind you, you heard Jake take in a sharp breath, unsure of what his issue was. As you broke the rack of balls and straightened up, you turned to look at him. The far away look in his eye was familiar, and your eyes widened at the realization of why he reacted so strongly to the innocent moment.
He had worked himself up teasing you at the booth, and was almost brought to his knees from the sight of you bent over the table.
‘So much for the boys thinking we’re friends.’ You thought, but you could not seem to be upset at him. The knowledge that you drove him crazy was nothing short of an ego boost, and you understood that you had a chance to get revenge for his merciless actions just moments earlier. You took a few steps towards him, turning to watch Sam take his shot. As you did, you made sure you were close enough for your ass to brush against him gently. His hand shot to your hip, holding you firmly in hopes that you wouldn’t move any further. You bit back the smile begging to break on to your lips, knowing that it would not take much to get him in the same state he had you in before starting the game.
“Easy, angel.” He whispered, his voice low but the warning clear. “Wouldn’t want to get us in trouble, would you?”
“No, sir.” You replied, just quiet enough for him to hear. But, trouble was the only thing you wanted to get into, and you weren’t sure how much longer you were willing to wait. He gave your hip a gentle squeeze, happy you were in clear understanding. With that, he stepped towards the table and started his turn. Josh was sat on the table opposite of your own, watching carefully in hopes of calling someone on an infraction of the rules. When he returned to you, he seemed a little more relaxed and forgiving of your actions.
“Another drink?” He asked, noticing that yours was nearing the end.
“Sure,” you nodded, looking up at him with a smile. “Thank you.” He nodded, leaning down and pressing a small kiss to your lips. You knew it was to satiate his own need for you, and the small contact would give him enough satisfaction to make it through the rest of the night. You watched as he walked towards the bar, a small smile stuck on your face as your head swam with intoxication.
“Not a girlfriend, eh?” Josh said, raising an eyebrow. Your head snapped towards him, almost embarrassed at his confrontation.
“Not a girlfriend.” You confirmed, firm on your stance.
“Can you be?” Sam asked, laughing at your response. “We like you.” Your heated with a blush (or the alcohol, you couldn’t really tell), happy that they seemed to take to your company well. You would be lying if you said you weren’t afraid of rejection.
“You can like me without me being a girlfriend, you know.” You said, watching as Danny finished up his turn.
“Obviously,” Sam rolled his eyes “but I think we can all agree we would like for you to be one. Don’t want him to fuck it up.”
“He can fuck it up just the same with a label.” Your counter arguments barely seemed to phase the three.
“I never thought he’d find someone nice. Everyone else was… well, horrible.” Sam chuckled, turning his attention to you fully. “He seems to like you a lot. He talks about you all the time.”
“He does?” You questioned, shocked at the statement. He nodded in response, looking to make sure Jake wasn’t already on his way back to the table. “Didn’t think we were that serious.” You said, making a note to discuss it with him when you were alone.
“I don’t think he does, either.” Josh laughed. “We just think it’s a shame you’re not. He has a pretty bad track record, and he kind of swore off the whole dating thing. He was insufferable for a little while, and then he met you. Seemed like it cleared his head a little bit. It’s nice.”
“Oh,” you said, feeling dread settle in your stomach. The cold feet you got from his simple statement was astounding, and you felt like running out the door and never looking back. You were not ready for feelings, and he promised to abide by the rule. If he was acting differently when you weren’t around, you weren’t sure you would be able to keep up at the same intensity without setting some boundaries.
“He’s on the same page as you, friend who is a girl.” Josh assured you, wanting you to know that you didn’t have to worry. “I think we all just like you, and we hope that you stick around for a while, at least.”
“Okay,” you calmed slightly, happy that Josh recalled your statement from the first time you met. “Because friends is all I do, Joshua.”
“Right,” he agreed, but it did not seem like he believed you. “You’re the friend that so happens to be a girl, and he’s a boy that is indeed just a friend.”
“Perfect, you got it.” You laughed, nodding in agreement. Just as you settled back into silence, Jake made his return from the bar with your drink in hand. Somehow, when he was back in sight, the fear disappeared and was replaced with a sense of calm. His eyes caught yours, and that little smile on his lips told you that everything would be alright and you need not worry about a thing. When he was a few feet away from you, the gravitational pull that constantly surrounded him seemed to pull you in, muting the rest of the world and allocating your energy solely on him.
“My turn?” He asked, handing you the whiskey glass.
“No, it’s mine. Too busy talking.” You admitted, your eyes never leaving the entrancing features of his face.
“Or were you just waiting for me?” He teased, his eyes watching you with the same intensity. “Am I your good luck charm, angel?”
“You wish.” You brushed him off, but your smile told him his comment was welcomed.
“And?” He raised an eyebrow, appalled that you ever thought differently and wondering what your issue with it was. He loved being needed by you, and that had never been a secret. You smiled, giving him a slight smack on the arm before turning towards the table. You looked over your options, but not in hopes of winning the game. Instead, you pondered the best spot to lean over the table to drive him just as crazy as the last. You were like two sex-crazed demons, doing whatever you could to instigate the inevitable and making each other suffer in the process. Greed had become you long before the night of drinking ensued, but your infatuation with each other seemed to hit an all time high, for not even a public setting could keep your hands away from each other.
You walked to the other side of the table, making sure you picked a ball that was in front of him. You leaned down, low to the velvet and lined your stick with the cue ball. Your dress left little to the imagination as is, but with the help of gravity, anything left to wonder was quickly answered. Jake had a tight fist around his cue, knuckles white as his eyes fixated on the fabric ever so slightly pulling away from your skin. You drew your arm back, putting a little more force than needed into your strike, making sure that you looked up at him to see his reaction as the top of your dress struggled to remain secured to your chest. He caught your eye, his jaw clenched tightly as he tried to remember where you were and who you were with. When you returned to your upright position, you gave him a subtle wink so he knew your intent was personal.
Sam moved to take his turn, completely unaware of the silent battle between you and his brother. You brought your drink to your lips, so invested in your own game that you let a dribble of whiskey fall from the cup and trail down your chin. You swallowed down the burning liquid, knowing that his stare hadn’t once broken from the obscene display you were putting yourself in. The cold droplets fell from your chin down your neck, eventually reaching the valley between your breasts. Slowly, it melted into your skin and disappeared into the fabric resting on your sternum. When you withdrew the drink from your lips, you thought you might have pushed him too far. As he watched, it almost seemed like his brain was short circuiting as he tried to keep up with the vile thoughts he was having about you. The interaction was so small that nobody noticed it other than him, but he was so invested in you that not a single motion would ever be missed.
Your skin was ablaze with desire from the thought of his hands alone, and neither of you were interested in the game of pool anymore. Reluctantly, Jake took his turn, glancing at you intermittently between his shots. By the time Danny took his, there was only the eight ball left.
“Can you help me?” You asked Jake, giving him a small, innocent smile.
“Nuh-uh,” Sam shook his head, shutting it down. “That’s cheating.”
“How so?” Jake asked, uncaring for any rules and itching to get his hands on you.
“We can’t do that!”
“Actually, you can.” You corrected, walking over to meet Jake by the cue ball. “You just don’t want to. Or, you didn’t think to ask first.” Sam gave you a glare, clearly not liking the two against one outlook.
“Grand chancellor will allow it.” Josh interjected, finding Sam’s discontent hilarious. Even more than that, he was hoping Sam would actually ask for Danny’s help if you missed.
“Who made you the grand chancellor?” Sam argued, clearly fighting a losing battle.
“I did,” Josh said, giving him a smile. While Sam argued his point with Josh, you and Jake had taken it upon yourselves to lean down over the table to line up your shot.
“You’re being a brat, sweetheart.” Jake whispered in your ear as he settled himself behind you. “That’s not very nice. Thought I told you to be good for me tonight?” His hand came up to your arm, fixating them in the correct position as his other one held your hip.
“I think you’re just horny.” You shot him down, completely ignoring his accusation. “I’m just trying to play pool.”
“No, you’re just trying to be a cocktease.” He corrected, his tone quiet but his delivery harsh. “You want me to take you into the bathroom and fuck you?” You could not deny the dull ache between your legs that stemmed from his question. “Is that what you want, sweet girl?” He hummed, his mouth settled just over your ear. A shiver ran down your spine, completely unfocused on the shot he was supposedly helping you take. “Answer me.” He hissed, guiding your arm back to fake the shot, getting you used to the motion.
“No, sir.” You lied through your teeth, knowing that it was exactly what you wanted. You did not think you could survive the drive home without a taste of what he was offering. As you spoke, you made sure to push your hips back into him only slightly; it was not enough for anyone else to pick up on, but the erection growing against your ass told you he’d noticed it as clear as day.
“What do you do to me?” He muttered, flickering his eyes between the white and black ball. “This is how it’s going to work, okay?” He said, taking a deep breath. “After we win this game, you’re going to go to the bathroom. Stay there for a while, I’ll pretend you aren’t feeling well. Then, I’ll come and check on you, and I’ll fuck you so good that you won’t even remember where we are.” A light gasp left your lips as your cunt clenched around nothing. “Do you understand me?”
“Yes, sir.” You muttered.
“Good, now hit the fucking ball and get this over with.” Instead of responding, you drew your arm back and hit the cue ball with just enough force to send the eight ball into the corner pocket. As you did, he made quick work at adjusting himself before anyone else noticed. Sam was so busy fighting with Josh that he didn’t even notice your stellar victory.
You straightened up with a smile on your face, knowing that Jake was the reason behind your success, yet still feeling proud that your hands made the winning play. Danny, who couldn’t have cared less about competition, applauded you and offered a high five. You responded with the same energy, jittering with excitement. When Sam turned to face the table, his expression was filled with disappointment at losing. You did not have the desire to console him over the loss, instead muttering a quick word about a good game before excusing yourself to the bathroom. You bustled to the other side of the bar in the direction of the bathroom, estatic when you found it vacant and awaiting your arrival.
You closed the door and clicked the lock, taking a quick look at yourself in the mirror. You straightened your hair and wiped away any specs of mascara that had fallen. Your foot was tapping against the ground as you waited for the knock, feeling like the seconds were more similar to eternities. Eventually, there was a soft knock on the door. With a breath of courage, you unlocked the door and opened it. You barely had a spare second to greet Jake, because he was already pushing his way inside and slamming the door behind him. He was in such a rush that one hand was already reaching for you as he fumbled with the lock.
You did not have the chance to say a word before his lips were on yours, desperate and angry at your relentless efforts to get under his skin. His hands shot to your hips, pulling you into him as the kiss dissolved into a messy and sloppy display of emotion. You let out a moan into his mouth, already descending into euphoria from the feeling of his body so close to yours. His fingers snaked under the skirt of your dress, forgoing any formalities as he bunched it up over your hips. Once your lower half was uncovered, he gave a hard tug on the elastic of your underwear by your hip, destroying yet another pair in wake of desire. In truth, you did not care; the only thing you cared about was him being inside of you, and you feared you would go insane if you had to wait a minute longer.
He gripped at your hips again, picking you up and roughly settling you on the counter while never breaking the kiss. You locked your legs around him, drawing him closer while hoping he never had to leave. If you could stay tangled amidst the web of his sinful touch forever, you would never have to search for anything more. “Did you think you were being smart pulling a stunt like that?” He asked, finally parting from you in a mess of heavy breathing. “Did you think being a tease would get you want you wanted?” He pressed even further, stopping his tornado of inquiry to bring his hand to his mouth and spit onto his fingers. “That you would get away with it without any punishment?” He lowered his hand to your cunt, the feral energy finally bubbling to the surface and ravishing his expression.
“I’m sorry, sir.” You pleaded, painfully aware of his touch that was so close yet just out of reach. “Didn’t mean to upset you.” You rushed out, looking down at his fingers just inches away from your heat.
“No?” He asked, his jaw hard set and his eyes dangerous. “Then what did you want, angel?” He was withholding any reward until he got a suitable answer from you. “Tell me exactly what you wanted, and I might be nice enough to give it to you.”
“I wanted you, sir.” You said, looking up to meet his eyes. “I wanted you to touch me. I need you to touch me. I can’t wait any longer.” You whined. You could not find it within yourself to be embarrassed about your own desperation, because your need for him far outweighed your own ego.
“Yeah? You want me to touch you, sweet girl?” He questioned, moving his hand just a little closer to you. “You just wanted me to take care of you? Make you cum all over my fingers right here in the bar?” Your face flushed at his vulgarity, but it only turned you on further. You could listen to him say nothing but filth all day and you would hang on to every word.
“God, yes.” You nodded, leaning forward and resting your forehead against his. “Please, Jake. I promise I’ll be good for you.”
“So fucking needy.” He growled, but his hand connected with your aching core as he spoke. You gasped at the sudden change, not expecting him to give in so easily. He spread your arousal to your clit, slipping his thumb over the sensitive bundle of nerves as he dropped his middle and index finger to your entrance. You bit back a moan as he began pumping his fingers into you, moving his thumb in time with his fingers. “I love it.” He confessed, nearly breaking down from your sounds of pleasure. “You know I’ll always give you what you want, baby. Just have to say the words.”
“Feels so good, Jake.” You whimpered, closing your eyes in bliss as he remained on a steady pace.
“As much as I’d like to stay here and fuck you all night, we have to make it quick. Don’t want people wondering where we are, do we?”
“No sir,” you agreed, using his body as support to keep you upright. You had an iron grip on his bicep, your skin electrified when his nose brushed against yours. You were only concerned with the pleasure steadily rising in your belly and the boy who was standing before you. When he was with you, with his skin on yours, nothing else in the world mattered, and nothing to come in the future would ever matter half as much. He was everything, and you were slowly coming to terms with the notion. Jake was the only man that held any importance in the entirety of the world, and the only one you ever wanted to touch you like such. He was an addiction, a disease that ravaged your whole body and left nothing behind. He was more evil than you could begin to comprehend, but you felt blessed to have him around.
The devil was the master at the game, convincing you that his company was a virtue when in reality, it was only the beginning of an eternity of suffering.
“This is what you needed, angel?” He crooned, watching his own work unfold in real time. His eyes were locked on his hand, his breathing laboured and his mind lost within the fantasy of fucking you again. “This is what you wanted so bad?”
“Yes, sir.” You groaned, feeling your heart thud against your chest. Your entire body was no longer under your command, now completely subject to whatever he felt inclined to do to you. You did not care, and you didn’t think you ever would. Even if he decided to bestow suffering, it would still be better than any kindness from another.
“You gonna cum for me, sweetheart?” You nodded against him, your legs trembling with the threat of your climax. “Don’t be shy, baby. Let the whole bar know how good I make you feel. I want to hear all of those pretty noises.” You were trembling under his touch, and his words struck the nail into the coffin. Without ever loosening your grip, you descended into an orgasm stronger than any you had ever felt before. You tried to cry out his name, to thank him for the grace he had given you, but you could not speak anything coherent. Even in the mess of jumbled thoughts where his name was most prominent, you could not seem to find the strength to speak it. As you rode out the high, he used his free hand to undo his belt buckle while continuing to pump his fingers into you. Before you had time to calm down from the excitement, he had freed himself from his jeans.
He withdrew his fingers, but you didn’t have time to grieve the loss of contact before he was pushing himself into you. Once he bottomed out inside of you, he brought you closer to the edge of the counter, allowing for easier access. “Fuck.” You cursed, letting your head fall back as you focused on the feeling of him. Sometimes, when you thought about it for too long, you convinced yourself that he was perfectly crafted and put on earth just to please you. The way your bodies moved in sync, moulding together in perfect harmony and pleasing each other just how you needed without even having to try. It was so hard to deny that it made your head spin, and the intensity in which you felt it to be true was nearly overwhelming.
“Tell me how good it feels, angel.” He purred, burying his head in your neck as he sucked at the sensitive skin.
“So fucking good, baby.” You sighed, tangling your hands in the hair at the base of his neck. You tightened your legs around him, hoping to bring him even closer than he already was. “You fill me up so good.”
“Such a dirty little whore.” He groaned, losing himself to the pleasure. You were both pent up, ready for a release before you ever made it to the bathroom. “Do you like being a whore for me, baby?”
“I love it,” you confessed, feeling the knot tightening in your belly, ready to let go at one slight movement. You were holding back, wanting to experience the height of the pleasure at the same time as him. You did not care that the entire bar likely knew what the two of you were doing, and you didn’t care about the awkward stares that would ensue when you emerged to join the crowd. You only cared about the boy you were wrapped around, and the fact that you got to spend the rest of the night with him after you went home. “I’m gonna cum, Jake.” You warned, a sharp gasp sounding as he pulled you towards him as he thrusted into you. The tip of his cock slammed into your cervix, sending a jolt of pain through you that was satiated by intense pleasure afterwards.
“Yeah? You want to cum with me?” He hummed, straightening up to catch sight of your face as you descended into your second orgasm. You nodded, your fingernails clawing at the fabric of his shirt to hold you in place as if you were scared of floating away. “Let go, angel. Cum for me.” You bit down on your lip, suffocating the moan that was trying to break free as he continued on his relentless pace.
“Oh, god.” You muttered, your eyes squeezed shut in bliss as your limbs began to tremble. He leaned down, capturing you in a kiss in hopes to silence your cries. He was only willing to share so much of you before the greed began to take over. He wanted you all to himself, and he wasn’t shy of that fact. Your moans fell directly into his mouth, feeding into his already wicked ego. The fire that burned in his heart was directly acreddited to you and your pleasure, and he survived solely of the way his name rolled so beautifully off of your tongue. As much as you were addicted to him, he knew that he was just as much, if not more of a victim to you.
The orgasm washed over you at the same time as his, both of you reaching your peak in a mess of curses. You sung his name like a hymn, and he uttered yours like a repentance. Neither of you could withstand the weight of the sin, but you were happy to die in each others arms. As you came down, he slowed his pace, careful not to make a mess of both of you. You let out a collective sigh of relief, the ghost of your orgasms still tingling over your skin as he pulled away. You couldn’t help but let out a whine of discontent as he pulled out, already missing the feeling of him inside you. He chuckled at your expression as he watched your face.
“Don’t be greedy, sweetheart.” He said, heaving a long sigh. “You’ve got a long night ahead of you, yet. Don’t think you’re going to get away with all of that teasing.” Your cheeks burned red at the thought, knowing that once he got you out the door, you wouldn’t be able to escape the repercussions of your actions. Even so, you knew that the punishment would be pleasurable, and you were already itching to take him home. He helped you off the counter, but stopped you as you made a move to clean yourself off. You looked up at him, confused at his intent. Before speaking, he grabbed the fabric of your dress and pulled it back down over your hips.
“What are you doing?” You breathed, looking up at him.
“That’s my way of making sure you say a quick goodbye.” He smirked.
“I don’t think so,” you shook your head, making a move to get past him again. He held you a little tighter, giving a disapproving tsk.
“Get out there,” he ordered, clearly showcasing his seriousness. “Finish your drink and say goodbye without making a mess, and then I’ll take you home and finish what you started.” You held his stare, both of you intense and unwilling to back down. “Clocks ticking, angel.” He reminded.
“Fine,” you huffed “but you better not pull any tricks once we’re out there.”
“Me? Never.” He grinned, a sparkle of adoration in his eye as he tried to gauge your comfortability with his request.
“Wipe the lipgloss off your face. Don’t think pink is your color.” You snipped, straightening your hair and your dress before stepping out of the bathroom without another word. He laughed at the fire in your eyes, doing as you asked and straightening himself up, too. When he left the bathroom, he watched you walk back towards his brothers with nothing short of love for you in his heart.
Although he’d never admit it, he was falling just as hard as you were. Greed had finally played its fatal part in the impending outcome of your situation, and sealed your fate of being infinitely intertwined with Jake Kiszka in a way you had been desperate to avoid.
TAGLIST:
@sacredjake @profitofthedune @thewritingbeforesunrise @sacredthethreadgvf @klarxtr @ohgodthefeeling-gvf @freefallthoughts @jaketlove @clairesjointshurt @ageofbajabule @dannys-dream @earthgrlsreasy @starshine-gvf @brujamagik @gvfmarge @ignite-my-fire @twistedmelodies @gretavangroupie @alwaysonthemend @edgingthedarkness @gvfpal @sinarainbows @writingcold @starcatcher-jake @literal-dead-leaf @takenbythemadness @gretasfallingsky @hsfallingsky @freyjalw @itsafullmoon @lyndz2names @blacksoul-27 @i-love-gvf @vikingsisthenewsexy @mp0801 @mindastreamofcolours @indigogvf @sparrowofthedawnsworld
#gvf#jake kiszka#greta van fleet#sam kiszka#jake gvf#sam gvf#danny wagner#josh gvf#gvf fic#danny gvf#greta van fleet angst#greta van fleet fluff#greta van fleet fic#greta van fleet smut#gvf smut#gvf series#gvf angst#gvf fluff#jake kiszka series#jake kiszka gvf#jake kiszka blurb#jake kiszka fluff#jake kiszka angst#jake kiszka fic#jake kiszka x reader#jake kiszka smut#jake kiszka fanfic#capital vices#builtbybrokenbells#josh kiszka
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Home - Jake Kiszka
Title: Home part 5 - Jake Kiszka
Link to part one, two, three, four
Synopsis: Was divorce the right choice or were you making a mistake? That would be for you and Jake to decide.
Word count: 2.4k
Warnings: Swearing, mentions of divorce, pregnancy and cheating. Slight smut. Fluff and angst.
Enjoy!
__________
Before you was someone you’d never seen, Jake didn’t look like himself- sunken, defeated eyes, a frown that never disappeared, and it seemed that he hadn’t been taking care of himself. He hadn’t stayed at your shared home since your anniversary, you suggested it was for the best. It would give you an idea of how your lives would be without one another. If he wasn’t in your everyday life and you could survive then you would know you’re making the right decision. But in reality, you were miserable without him. You’re sure he saw how dead inside you looked as well- that was if he’d look at you.
Jake nodded along with every word the divorce attorney said as he read through the different legal documents he brought with him, not saying a word. He kept picking at his fingernails, occasionally biting them down too far.
“We will have to negotiate a settlement, but judging by the looks on your face, that is for another day.”
You were zoning out, barely paying any attention to what was being said, you simply kept questioning your decision. In all honesty, you wanted to wrap Jake in your arms and apologize for ever suggesting this happen, but it seemed it was too late for that. You wanted a family with him and that was going to happen one way or another with the life growing inside of you. You wanted to grow old and live the rest of your lives together.
“Mr. and Mrs. Kiszka, thank you for your time and cooperation today. I will be back next week in hopes that you guys have written settlement negotiation statements.” and with that, the attorney is leaving and your husband stands in the entryway of the house he once stayed in.
Neither of you speak and your heart wrenches watching Jake stare blankly at the wooden floors. “Is this what you want?” Your husband says quietly. His voice is hoarse, dry, tired.
“I don’t know what I want, Jake…” Jake takes his bitten raw bottom lip between his teeth, chewing the skin. “I- I want us to be happy, but we keep taking steps backwards instead of forward and it’s hurting me.” Tears well up in your eyes, threatening to spill down your cheeks.
He deeply inhales before looking up at you with his bloodshot eyes, “You really should figure that out, y/n.”
You watch the way he opens the front door, looking back at you once more before putting his head back down and exiting the house. It seemed that instead of him hurting you, you were now hurting him. You felt sick to your stomach. You wanted him to come back and demand you stay with him and that he’ll make you happier than you’ve ever been- to tell you that he loves you more than anything, but he doesn’t. His car is already out of sight, and will be until next week for the next meeting.
Jake couldn’t stop thinking about the way you showed no emotion during the meeting with the attorney. He knew it pained you to do this, but he figured it was going to be best for you- all he wanted was for you to be happy and if this is what it takes then so be it. Jake also knew that he wouldn’t be entirely out of your life once the divorce is final- you are carrying his child.
It killed him not to be with you right now, to not be able to hold you, praise and reassure you. He hated himself for everything he did to you- the pain he caused. He was the one who led you to this decision. It was all his fault.
He laid in his childhood bed that night, staring at the ceiling, imagining your smile and laugh. Besides the noises you let out when he was giving you nothing but pleasure, your laugh was his favorite sound in the whole world. It made his heart flutter every time. He heard it on your anniversary about two week ago and hasn’t heard it since.
Tossing and turning was all Jake could do, he couldn’t sleep- couldn’t quiet his thoughts that told him to call you, to get you to stay with him- to be happy with him. Jake felt like he was in his own personal hell that he built with his own two hands. His mom even ridiculed him for his actions after he explained what he did. Josh was furious with him, refusing to speak to Jake unless necessary. Jake’s entire world was shattering before him and all he had was tape to try and mend it, all the tape did was peel off and expose the existing wounds.
The twin bed felt so cold without you next to him. Your soft snores didn’t soothe him to sleep. He couldn’t pull you into his chest and smell the body wash that wafted off of you. Meanwhile, you hadn’t slept either. Continuously tossing and turning the entire night until you felt sick from moving too much. Eventually you made your way downstairs and sat in one of the barstools facing the kitchen and cried. By now, your eyes were swollen and red, your cheeks stained with the streaks from your tears.
The cold morning air of the house raised goosebumps on your skin as you sat in just Jake’s old bathrobe that inevitably became yours as soon as he brought it home. You cradled your stomach, wishing this wasn’t happening. While you were excited for a child, how could you actually love it right now with knowing about your husband's indiscretions. It felt like you were being strangled by the air around you. You didn’t know what was right and what was wrong, if you were making the right decision or not.
The time apart from him, even if it was just a few nights, was insufferable. You missed the cologne he would cover himself in because he knew you liked it after a night where you had gotten hot and bothered when he returned home. You missed hearing the strumming of his acoustic guitar in the living room. The whiskey on the shelf hadn’t been touched when usually it’d be gone within a few days, but it remained almost full. Jake was your life and he was gone, there was nothing for you to do without him here. Your phone rested face down on the marble counter, just waiting for you to pick it up and dial his number. It seemed someone beat you to it though. Your phone started buzzing, alerting you that someone was calling you. Looking at the screen, it was Jake.
“You answered.”
He sounded worse than he did earlier that day when you last saw him. “Why wouldn’t I?”
“Cause you’re leaving me, figured you’d want nothing to do with me.”
“Jake…”
He heavily exhales. “This was a mistake, I’m sorry.” And the line went dead.
Sobs rack through your body, violently shaking you. You didn’t want him to hang up, already missing the sound of his voice, the way it soothed you. Your shaking hands picked up the phone that you had dropped upon breaking down in tears and redialed the most recent number. It rang and rang with no answer, sent to voicemail. Jake watched the way his phone would light up several times, wondering if he should answer. Wondering why you wanted to talk to him.
Sniffles drew his attention. “Jake…”
“Baby? What’s wrong?” he panics for a moment, worrying that something may have happened to you in the few minutes that he didn’t answer your calls.
“I’m sorry, Jake. I’m so sorry.” You sobbed into the phone.
Jake’s heart shatters. “You have nothing to be sorry about, y/n. It’s my fault.”
“I-I..”
“Breathe, baby. I need you to breathe.” Jake fully sits up in the bed. He didn’t know why you were apologizing to him and crying hysterically.
“I- I want you to come home, Jake. Please.. Please.” It was a dilemma in Jake’s mind, he wasn’t sure if it would be a good idea to see you right now or if it would make things better. Regardless, you needed and wanted him and he wanted you too. ““I- I don’t want a divorce… I want you home, with me… with us.” You sob harder.
Shuffling comes from the other line. “Wait for me, baby. I’ll be there soon, okay?”
After saying your goodbyes, it felt like an eternity before the front door was opened to reveal your husband. Jake stood before you, waiting for a signal that it was okay to approach you, but you had other plans. You raced across the room to crash into Jake’s chest, still shaking from the crying you were doing. He stiffened for a moment before running his hands up and down your spine, and placing his face in the crook of your neck, letting his own tears fall.
“I’m sorry, Jake. I’m so sorry.”
Jake pets down the wispy hairs that stick up on your head. “Shhh baby. You have nothing to be sorry for.” He lets you claw at his shirt and stain the fabric with the droplets of water that spill from your still beautiful eyes.
“I asked for a divorce- I don’t want that. I want you. I want you here with me.”
“Baby, you’ve gotta calm down, I can’t stand to see you crying like this.” He peels your face away from his chest to look into your glossy eyes. Even crying, you look like an angel and for the time being, you were still his angel.
Your breathing becomes level again with the occasional hiccup while Jake shushes you and holds you to him. Realizing that you keep bouncing between each foot, he’s sure that your feet are aching. Jake’s hands slide down your back to the backs of your thighs and he lifts you up, cradling you as he carries the two of you over to the sofa. “You’re okay, baby. We’re okay.” he whispers sweet-nothings in your ear. “You’ve gotta tell me though, what changed your mind?”
“I missed you so much, it hurt, Jake. It hurt.” His thumbs wiped away the tears that remained on your reddened cheeks. “Don’t leave me again.” you press your face into the swell of his chest, inhaling the signature musky scent of his.
“I won’t. I promise you, I won’t.”
Looking into his brown eyes, you knew he was it for you. You’ve known since the day you met him, but even more now that you can’t live without your husband in your life. He was everything to you; a husband, your best friend, the one you loved. You hadn’t felt this comfortable and alive in months, it was like a breath of fresh air. Neither of you wanted to separate, stuck together like glue. Two souls combining as one. Jake was yours as you were his.
“I never stopped loving you, Jake.” He feels his heart stop. You telling him this gave him the reassurance he needed, deep down he knew, but it hadn’t been spoken until now.
“I love you so fucking much, baby.” Your own hands reach up to hold his face, wiping his own tears as he did to you. A soft smile spread across your face- the first genuine smile you showed in months.
Jake lets you lean in and plant your chapped lips against his own. The two of you move together in sync, slowly and lovingly. He had your touch not long ago, but this was different. It was like your first kiss all over again in the dark school gym at your high school prom. Jake pulled away, panting. He looked into your eyes and saw the girl he fell in love with- the shy, but wild girl that he gave his heart and soul to. While you saw the careless, wild boy that drove you to the brink of insanity and persuaded you into going on a date with him to a rundown diner on the outskirts of town.
You broke into a fit of laughter, collapsing against his chest once more. “I probably look ridiculous right now.”
“Never. You look just as beautiful, if not more, than the day we met.”
Your giggles die down and the frown you’d kept over the past few months reappeared. Though the light in your eyes was still there, you spoke in a deadly, monotone voice. “Don’t you ever cheat on me again, Kiszka.”
“I won’t risk losing you ever again.” Jake pressing kisses all over your face, causing your giggles to fill the void in his heart again. He pushes you back slightly, his head traveling lower. “I won’t risk losing you again either.” Your husband presses his lips to your clothed stomach.
No more words were spoken, you basked in the silence and happiness that flooded the living room. Piece by piece, articles of clothing had been stripped away from each of your bodies, softly landing on the hardwood floors behind you. Jake made sure with the more skin of yours that was revealed to him that he left his marks upon you. With every soft gasp and moan you let out, it encouraged him to continue expressing his love. He swore his heart was going to leap out of chest seeing you in all of your glory- naked atop of him. Your nipples perked up with the cold air. The swell of your stomach protruded a little bit more, still hardly noticeable, but to Jake it was and it still astounded him that you were having his baby. His baby was having a baby.
Your moans echoed through the house with every movement Jake made within you. Your nails left bright red scratch marks in their wake. Jake let out groans of his own, blending together with yours and creating the best melody he’s ever heard. Watching you reach your peak was something he’d never get tired of seeing. It felt like a dream. You both gasped for air, coming down from your highs. You regretted ever trying to end what you two had. The home you shared reeked of sex and flourishing love.
Looking into each other's eyes once more, you see the love you’d been missing. “You’re my home.”
“And you are mine.”
__________
Taglist (send me an ask if you wanna be added!)
@kerryxgvf @jakekiszkasnose @gretavansteph @welightthefire @oh-theseus @hayley1623 @t00turnttrauma @dannythedog @jakesgrapejuice @pi11owpr1nc3ss @maedesculpaeusoubi @myownparadise96 @writingcold @gretavansteph
#jake kiszka angst#jake kiszka x reader#jake kiszka smut#gvf imagine#gvf x reader#greta van fleet x reader#greta van fleet imagine#greta van fleet angst#greta van fleet smut#gvf
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『game plan - jmk』
jmk x f!reader
I added a lot more than I think was intended, but it fit together so well in my mind and I love the result.
THIS PIECE WILL BE REGARDED AS 18+, MINORS DNI
» requested
warnings: slight mention of sexual content, breeding kink, mentions of pregnancy, more angst than originally intended, and fluff so sweet you’ll have cavities tomorrow
☀
You let out one last long moan as Josh finished inside you. The recording studio had been particularly tense, the twins getting into it time after time. It seemed that whenever they finished an argument, one could simply breathe, and another row would ensue. Of course, you hadn’t been there, that was simply what Sam had said when he called to warn you that Josh might be especially agitated when he got home.
With that in mind, you had immediately gone to work, prepping the house for your boyfriend’s return. You lit candles and incense, dimmed the lights, and made him a Salty Dog. Figuring he would simply want to relax, you also dropped the needle on a jazz album he had in his collection. But Josh Kiszka did not want to relax. Quite the opposite, actually. After seeing all the work you had put in, he downed his drink and carried you up to the bedroom, where the next two hours were spent in anything but a relaxing state.
A lazy smile was directed at the curly haired man, his teeth shining brightly as he walked to get a warm washcloth. You reached for your phone to check the time, only to see a notification from three hours ago.
“Fuck, fuck, fuck!” Josh rushed out at your proclamation, now in boxers.
“What is it, mama?”
“I forgot to take my fucking pill!”
He looked confused for a second only to remember that little case of tiny white pills you kept with you. The ones that allowed him to indulge in his secret little kink of cumming inside you, your birth control.
“Oh. Fuck.” You looked up, nodding as you shared his concern.
After a moment of deep silence, he asked, “Can you still, y’know, take it?”
“Yeah, I will, but we should probably get a Plan B, just in case,” to break the tension, you joked, “No little Kiszkas yet.”
He didn’t miss the last word, and it didn’t escape you that you had said it. The silence became different then. Neither of you wanted to address it, but you both had to. It was a promise of a future, you wanted assurance that he shared that promise, that it wasn’t one-sided. He wanted a similar promise, one of understanding, the music, the fans, his brothers.
“I’ll go get it.” You attempted to get up, but the overwhelming soreness between your legs prevented that, and instead, your knees wobbled and you fell back to the bed.
“You stay here, mama, rest, and I’ll go get it.” If he was being honest, he had no idea what he was looking for. Nobody had ever indulged him like you had. But that one little word was nearly choking him and he needed to clear his head.
The Walgreens down the street was nearly void of cars. It was freezing inside and a light flickering near the door would probably drive him insane if he thought about it long enough.
“Where would they be?” Josh muttered to himself, wiping his palms on his khaki shorts. He checked the medicine aisles first, and let out a frustrated sigh when that search turned up empty. He decided to simply check every aisle at that point.
A pair of teenage girls were in the makeup aisle, giggling and searching for something specific. He could tell they were sisters and he remembered his and Jake’s late night trips like that, and when Sam began to beg to join them. He moved to the craft aisle, where a mother stood with her son, a smaller baby in a stroller in front of her.
“What do you need for your project, Joshua? I don’t see why you didn’t tell me about this days ago.” She wasn’t frustrated, simply tired from the time of night and what had probably been a long day.
“I’m sorry mommy.” She pulled him closer, urging him to grab what he needed so they could get home.
He thought it fitting that the boy’s name was Joshua, he too always waited until the last minute to tell his parents about projects due the next day. Josh hoped it wasn’t genetic. The scene brought him back to you. Yet. Josh hadn’t really ever had time to seriously think about kids. He knew he wanted them, eventually. But when was eventually? The last two years with you had been an unexpected whirlwind, and he never wanted that to settle. But what was life if not moving to the next milestone?
Speaking of, he really needed to find better hiding spots. You had almost spotted that black velvet box under the bathroom sink, and he was waiting for the perfect moment. Now he was wandering aimlessly around the store when it hit him. Wherever there are pregnancy tests, there should be Plan B. He eventually found it and, when he had everything he needed, he checked out, ignoring whatever judgment seemed to be coming from the older cashier.
When he pulled into the driveway, he took a deep breath. The music coming from the bathroom alerted him of your presence there. Your eyes were closed, bubbles covering most of your body.
“Mama?” he whispered, not wanting to disturb you.
“Huh? Oh, hey Joshy. Made my way in here a few minutes ago, thought it would help with the soreness.”
“Has it?”
“A bit so far. Did you find it?”
He nodded, pulling the box out of the bag. After opening it, he handed it to you, along with a bottle of chocolate milk.
You laughed at him, confused at the drink choice.
“Do you remember when we met?” He grabbed your hand, gently playing with your fingers. “You walked into that coffee shop and ordered an iced hot chocolate, and she told you that was just chocolate milk, so you got that.”
“That…wasn’t when we first met?”
“Well, you didn’t notice me, but I noticed you. Couldn’t get you out of my mind, and a few hours later we just happened to be in the same record shop.”
“I was looking for Dolly Parton’s greatest hits,” you laughed at the memory.
“Mhm. I’d made the decision hours before in that coffee shop that if I ever saw you again, it was fate, written in the stars. It was, us, we were always meant to be. Out of the seven billion people, you chose me.” His eyes were softer than you’d ever seen them.
“I just wanted to fuck a rockstar, you just wouldn’t leave.” You both laughed. Truth was, when you saw him in that record shop, before he had even noticed you, you knew he would hold a place in your heart.
“We’re like two stars, bound to meet and form the most beautiful constellation. Earlier, when you said that thing about kids, it honestly scared me. I don’t know why, it just did. But after I thought about it, I wouldn’t want it with anyone else. I don’t want life with anyone else.”
He turned around, pulling out your favorite candy. Josh moved to the sink and asked you to close your eyes.
When he allowed you to open them, a box with a ring was in front of you. You gasped.
“I’ve had it for, like, a month. No moment ever seemed perfect enough, but every second I’m with you is perfect. Will you spend forever with me?”
Your hand grasped the back of his neck, pulling him in for a kiss.
“Of course I will, rockstar.”
〚taglist〛
gvf: @doodle417 @brokenbellz @gretavanfleas @pyrojoshy @greta-van-chaos @xserenax-13 @hayley1623 @kdarling1 @autumns30 @keighoe @chalametpwk @sammysvanfeet @shawnsthighs @gretavanbitches @sammiejane22 @gretavanbestie @jordierama
joshy: @prophetofthedune @loofypoofy @gretavangrace
#josh kiszka#josh gvf#josh kiszka smut#josh kiszka fluff#josh kiszka fanfiction#josh kiszka angst#jake kiszka smut#jake gvf#jake kiszka#sam kiskza#Sammy gvf#sam kiszka smut#danny wagner#danny gvf#danny wagner smut#Greta Van Fleet#greta van fleet fan fiction#greta van fleet smut#greta van fleet angst#greta van fic#greta van fluff#greta van smut#GVF#gvf smut#gvf fanfiction#gvf fic#gvf fluff
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note: sorry for the break of fluff, idk what happened there for a second but uh. . . back to our regularly scheduled programming:) also it's been a hot minute since I just posted a one-shot and walked away
pairing: Josh x F!Reader
warnings: angsty, mentions of cheating, mentions of sex, cursing, arguing, terrible grammar
word count: 1.7k
You sat staring at the pink stick in your hands, that stupid plus sign staring back at you. You had wanted this, at some point in your life, but not like this. Definitely not like this. You set the stick down, washed your hands, and then went and flopped down on your bed. You grabbed the pillow and held it to your face, letting out a scream.
This is your karma, this is what you deserve. There was no one or nothing you could blame this on, but yourself. You couldn’t blame the distance between you and Josh, or him spending longer days at the studio, or the fights that you two seemed to pick all the time. There was nothing you could say that drove you into the arms of another man. You felt sick, not sure if it was morning sickness or the feeling of guilt rising in your body.
You jumped up from the bed, running for the bathroom. You barely got the toilet lid up as you were throwing up the contents of your lunch. Tears streamed down your face as you heaved. The only thing going through your mind was how you were going to tell Josh.
Josh has been your everything for the past 3 years of your life. You had met him while you were singing at a local jazz club, and it had truly been love at first sight. Josh had never been so in love with someone’s voice, but he did. He had met you right after your set, and asked you out. You were nervous at first, not really wanting to put your heart back out on the firing line. You had recently gotten out of a bad breakup, but Josh made you remember what it was like to be loved again.
Josh did everything he could to remind you how much you meant to him, and how much he had loved you. You two had promised each other to never go to bed angry, and usually it worked. You two would argue, spend some time apart in various places of the house or studio, and then reconcile so you both could sleep soundly next to each other. But the last fight you two had, was nasty. Words that weren’t supposed to be shared, we’re shared. Thoughts that were meant to stay with one another were spoken out loud. Glass, pictures, flowers had been thrown around the house, making it look like a hurricane in its wake. Josh had left, not giving you any explanation of where he was going.
— — —
You were shaking with tears, and called the one person you knew you could talk to. He had comforted you, helping you pick up the pieces of the torn relationship. He held you while you cried, letting you get out all your emotions. He even stayed, knowing that he probably shouldn’t have. He laid down next to you, holding you. He could smell Josh’s shampoo lingering on the pillow, when you first kissed him. He could see the faint love bites Josh had left a couple nights ago, as he took off your shirt.
“We shouldn’t do this,” He whispered.
“Please,” You whined, “He won’t touch me, he won’t even look at me. I need it, please.”
He loved the way you were begging, so he threw all possible caution to the wind, gripping your hips, dragging them back and forth over his clothed cock. He discarded your clothes, leaving you both naked and exposed to each other. Your hands roamed his muscular back as he thrusted into you. You were thankful it was dark in the room, as silent tears ran down your face in both guilt and pleasure.
— — —
That night of complete weakness had been almost two months ago. The next day Josh had come home, knocking shyly on the door. You were startled, running downstairs before he could find you and the familiar stranger in bed together. Josh had brought your favorite flowers, apologizing for the words he had said. You asked to be left alone for the day, and he obliged, promising to come home for dinner though. Once he had left, you ran upstairs to kick the man in your bed out.
But since that day, your relationship with Josh had slowly started to heal itself. You and Josh had talked about the faults in the relationship, and promised to heal what was broken. He had invited you to the studio, making sure to fill his downtime with you. You had bought new glassware to replace what was broken in the fight. Josh also had picked up on the spontaneity, coming home at random times during the day to bring you flowers. Everyone around you seemed to pick up on the new and improved moods of both of you. Your love sick smiles and puppy love flooded over to everyone else, but one person.
— — —
“You need to fucking tell him.” He whispers to you. You both stood in the hallway, he had dragged you out of the room when Josh stepped into the booth to record a track.
“I can’t do that. We’re finally happy again, why can’t you just let it be.” You spoke, folding your arms over your chest. You looked back into the studio, seeing Josh’s bright smile as he heard the playback of his song.
“You tell him. . . or I will.”
You watched as he walked back into the studio, his long hair swishing as he walked. You sighed, running your hand over your forehead. You couldn’t tell Josh, not when things had just gotten better between the two of you.
— — —
You perked up from your spot on the bed when you heard the front door open, and the familiar footsteps of your lover. You quickly sat up from your spot and ran to the bathroom, gathering the remnants of the life changing news and shoving them into your sock drawer. You closed the drawer just as Josh pushed the bedroom door open.
“There you are!” Josh smiled walking over to you, “I was calling for you.”
“Sorry,” You mumbled and walked over to kiss his cheek, “I didn’t hear you. How was the studio?” You asked him, walking out of the room, hoping to get as far away from the evidence as possible. Josh followed you as you went downstairs, talking about his day, which you had drowned out. The only thing you could hear is the blood rushing in your head. You moved on autopilot as you opened the fridge, grabbing a snack and a bottle of water.
“Hey… you okay?” Josh asked, his hand gently on your shoulder. You softly pushed away from him, putting distance between you, “Y/N, you’re scaring me… what’s going on love?”
“N-Nothing, Josh,” You said, shaking your head. You put a smile on your face as you tried to listen to Josh drone on about being at the studio. But nothing was distracting you from the sinking feeling in your stomach.
You took in his features, committing them to memory as he spoke about how his day went. It was the small things like how he talked with his hands and how he had a vocabulary that was just so him, that made you fall in love in the first place. You were trying to block out the feeling of guilt rising in your stomach, his bright eyes and smile making you feel worse.
Josh could read you like an open book. He could tell when something was wrong, whether you were upset or angry or didn’t feel good. That’s what came from years of spending time around you, getting to know you, falling in love with you. Josh sometimes knew what you were feeling before you did. Josh could tell now that something was wrong. Your smile didn’t quite reach your eyes, you were looking anywhere but at him, you were taking extra long sips of your water. Your body language was closed off, almost as if you didn’t want him to be around.
“Okay, Y/N, cut the shit,” Josh said, startling you from your spaced off look.
“What?” You asked him.
“You’ve ignored every single thing I have had to say since I walked through the door. I just asked you what you wanted for dinner and it’s like you couldn’t even hear me. There’s something you’re not telling me. So what is it?” Josh asked.
Just like Josh, you could read him like an open book too. You could see in the way he clenched and unclenched his fists that he was getting angry. You swallowed harshly, taking in a deep breath. You knew you had let this go on long enough. That the infidelity was one thing, this situation was another.
You opened and closed your mouth a couple times, before finding the words to say, “I’m pregnant.”
Josh stumbled back for a second, shock taking over his body. He looked from your face to your belly and then back to your face a couple times. His mind was running miles and miles per second, like you had just spoken a foreign language to him.
“What?” Josh asked, shocked, as he walked towards you. He gently held his shaky hands out to you, placing a hand softly on your belly. You closed your eyes and let tears fall down your cheeks. You lifted your head up, your face towards the ceiling, hoping he wouldn’t see.
“Baby! That’s amazing. I-I can’t believe it! I’m gonna be a dad?” Josh exclaimed, his bright smile finding his face again, “Why are you crying? What’s wrong?”
“Josh, “ You said, sucking in a breath. You looked down at the ground, not being able to look him in the eye as you said barely above a whisper, “It’s not yours.”
Josh felt like you had stabbed him, as he took a quick step back from you. You looked up at him, your heart breaking seeing the look on his face. He looked repulsed by you, completely disgusted. Josh let out a short breath and clenched his jaw.
“Who’s?” He asked you.
“Josh, I-”
“Goddammit!” Josh yelled, sweeping everything off the kitchen counter, sending plates and mugs crashing to the ground. You jumped at the sound of the glass breaking, your hands quickly going to your stomach in defense, “Who’s fucking kid!?”
“Sam’s. . .”
-- -- --
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Bloodshed: Part 5 - Danny
Author's Note: We return with another installment of Bloodshed. Apologies for the long wait but now we get into the good stuff. A huge secret gets revealed.
Warnings: Pretty tame but still 18+. Language. Secrets. Lies. Fire. Anger. Yelling. Mentions of war. Injury (if you squint).
Bloodshed Master List (Get caught up!)
Awoken the next morning to the shouting of David outside of his window, Danny grumbles and pulls himself out of bed. Ever since dreaming the nightmare, he had a difficult time falling back to sleep. He kept still, not wanting to keep Irridessa awake at his expense. So he lay there in bed all night, willing sleep to come and take over again. But to his dismay, he’d cat nap and then be awake even longer.
David’s hands grab hold of the window frame and he lifts himself up. “Daniel, get up!”
“David! Not the window!”
“Well you weren’t answering your door! Come on, get up!”
“Why?” Danny groans as he staggers over to the window.
“We’re going to check out the Winter Realm! See your new palace and meet the people! Father wants Winter and Spring to create a new treaty with each other. Winter will no longer rely on Spring but we still want to be able to trade and commune together.”
Danny sighs and runs his hands down his face. “And why you? Why not Sam?”
“Oh uh.. I have nothing planned until later today when I travel with Joshua to the Mining Realm. So I offered Father my presence in accompanying you to the Winter Realm for the morning.”
“Are you even prepared for the Winter Realm?”
“I have at least five layers of clothing on and I packed an extra fox fur hat just in case I need it.”
“Mm..” Danny hums. “Alright, give me ten minutes to get ready and I will meet you outside!”
“Aye aye, your majesty!”
“Don’t call me that..” Danny mumbles.
“Uh, right.. Sir?”
“Just get off the window!” Danny says as he shoves David off the sill. “Meet me out front!”
Flinging the door open, not even ten minutes later, Danny emerges from the cottage and adjusts his knitted hat over his head. He looks over at David who simultaneously looks like he’s going to go hike the tallest mountain while also sweating buckets because of the Spring warmth. Danny slightly scoffs and shakes his head.
“You look like a buffoon..” Danny says as he adjusts his sword to his hip and slings his pack onto his back.
“Won’t you be cold?” David says, pointing out Danny’s light layers. Just like David, he’s starting to perspire along his forehead. The warmth of Spring slowly heated him up, more than normal. Guess that comes with the territory of now ruling the Winter Realm.
“David, I have ice flowing through my veins now.. This heat is practically melting me.”
“You’re telling me..” David pulls at the scarf around his neck. “I’m getting a bit toasty underneath all of this.”
“Well you won’t be once we reach the border,” Danny says. “So stay close. I won’t be responsible for losing you in the winter woods.”
He doesn’t want to be responsible for David’s death at all. Unknowing what the vision was from last night, he fears taking his eyes off of David for even a second. So he makes him walk ahead of him so he can keep him in his sights at all times.
This war that he had dreamt of, has been at the forefront of his mind. Who knows if this adventure to the Winter Realm begins the rippling effect into this war and ultimately David’s death. But he isn’t one to find out, so keeping in close steps with David will ensure his safety into the Winter Realm and back to Spring still alive and intact.
As they begin to cross over the border and into Winter, Danny can feel his body adjusting to a comfortable temperature. Cold. He can feel the ice rebuilding in his veins. He flexes his hand, watching as his skin pales in comparison to David’s. His once perfect tan was now diminishing as the cold settled into his body. But he isn’t cold, he just feels comfortable.
“Woah..” He hears David gasp. Danny looks over at David, his jaw falling open as he watches Danny transform from his former Spring-self and into his new form–King of Winter. “That is incredible.” Danny flips over his hands as he still examines himself. “If that happens to you, I wonder what it’s like for the other rulers. How awesome would it be to have fire blazing through your body in the Autumn Realm?”
Danny scoffs and adjusts his clothes on his body. They’ve become a little tighter and slightly uncomfortable. He turns to Spring’s youngest prince and straightens out his shirt. “There’s one thing you should know about the Autumn Realm.” He says. “They do not have magic.”
The youngest prince’s brows furrow together as confusion covers his face. “They don’t?”
Danny shakes his head. “Long ago,” He begins the story as they continue on their journey through the Winter woods. “Before you were even born, there was a war between the Autumn Realm and the Spring Realm. About what? No one really knows the full story behind it, still to this day. Or so one thinks..” He inhales and continues on with the story. “Powers were abused.. You know how Spring has the gifts of growing plants, creating new life and the gift of shapeshifting. Summer can fly, they soar on the summer breezes and they can use levitation. Note to self, don’t piss off a Summer dweller or else you’ll end up with a vase being thrown at you.”
David’s eyebrows perk. “And did you?” He smirks. “Piss off a Summer dweller?”
Danny chuckles. “It was very benign and she hasn’t forgiven me since. Anyways–Autumn used to be gifted with healing as well as fire.”
“What did they do that got that taken away?” David asks.
“It’s not what they did..” Danny says. “It’s what one of them did. According to the legend of this war, one rogue healer from the Autumn Realm was having an affair with someone in the Spring realm, which is forbidden.”
“Scandalous..” David chuckles. “How did they find out?”
“The rogue healer was caught sneaking around the village. He was tortured by the King’s men until he confessed the truth of him having this affair.”
“So because of him, the whole realm was punished? None of them have powers?”
Danny shakes his head. “Not a single soul in that realm can heal by their hands or conjure fire. A forbidden rule was broken, one that was agreed upon between all four realms.”
“So did he ever confess who he was having an affair with?”
Danny narrows his eyes at David. “You’re asking an awful lot of questions.”
David shrugs his shoulders. “There’s a lot of things that I know nothing of.” He says. “Mother keeps the history of Spring locked up in the library.”
“Think she might be hiding something?” Danny winks.
David rolls his eyes. “She has been secretive about it. Telling me not to pay mind to it, it’ll scare me.” He scoffs. “I am twenty-two years old, Daniel. I can handle one scary book.”
Danny smiles and nods his head. “I’m sure you can, but Spring has an awful history. It’s best if you don’t know about it.”
“Do you know what it is?”
Danny shakes his head. “I know only what the realm speaks up–which is mostly gossip and myths.”
–
The two of them finally reach the edges of Winter’s village. People are bustling around and chatting with one another. But a few slowly pause as Danny and David make their way down the roads. Some were confused but others bore smiles and relief when they recognized Danny. David took notice of the attention and he stayed as close to Danny as he could.
“There he is!” A man shouts from the window of a village cottage. “He’s here! Sir Daniel from the Spring realm has arrived!”
Suddenly they were flooded with the village people. Some were excited to see Daniel and meet their new king and ruler. Others stood by, grumbling and groaning about how Winter doesn’t need a new ruler and they were surviving perfectly well with Spring as their aide.
David laughs cheerfully as his arms are being filled with food and clothing, weapons, and all kinds of gifts. They all seemed to think that he was Danny’s footman.
Not wanting to lose sight of David, Danny keeps a tight hold on the strap of David’s pack and guides him through the crowd. He gives the people his thanks, shaking their hands with his free hand. Eventually they make it to the gates of the palace, which stood tall atop of a snowy mountain with a long, winding road leading up to it.
“We have to walk all the way up there?” David says as he adjusts the load in his arms.
“No,” A male voice says behind them. They turn around to see a carriage with a male sitting on top of it. David’s eyes bug out as he gets a good look at it. It’s completely made out of ice, even the wheels themselves are ice. Pulling the carriage are two horses, all white with piercing black eyes like coal. “Your majesty, I am the driver of your stagecoach. Would you like a ride up to the palace? It would be a nasty walk otherwise.”
“Yes, of course.” Danny says. He’s starting to think he might just get used to this realm fairly quickly. Although he’ll miss Spring and his brothers, and keeping his eye on David, he just knows this is right for him.
The ride up the road to the palace was smooth. Pine trees covered in ice and snow line the road all the way up. Danny thought he was imagining things when he thought he saw a creature bolting between the trees at an alarming rate. But he isn’t imagining it at all. Running up beside the carriage on either side is a pack of wolves. They howl in unison and follow the carriage all the way up to the palace gates.
“Wow..” He hears David gasp. “I know this is Winter but is everything made of ice?”
Danny chuckles. “Not everything.” He says.
Once the carriage comes to a stop within the palace grounds, he opens the door of the carriage and steps out. He helps David with the multitude of items in his arms. Coming out of the palace and rushing over are three servants and who Danny can only assume is the butler.
“Be careful of the butler,” David mumbles under his breath to Danny. “It’s usually the butler who did it..”
Danny jabs his elbow into Danny’s side causing him to laugh. “Quit listening to Jacob’s stories..” David snickers and shifts his weight from one foot to the other.
“Welcome, Sir Daniel, to the Ice Palace.” The butler says as he approaches. “Do let the servants handle all of that for you.” He says.
Danny and David both hand off the items to the servants who quickly rush with them to the palace. “Is this palace really made of ice?”
“David..” Danny warns. “Knock it off.”
“What?” David exclaims, his voice pitchy. “This is amazing! I’ve never been outside of Spring yet, so I find all of this fascinating.”
“I do apologize if I sound rude, but who are you?” The butler says, turning his attention to David.
“This is David, Prince of Spring.” Danny introduces him. “He’s joining me this morning.”
“Oh wonderful, it’s been a while since we’ve had any Spring royalty visiting this realm.” The butler says. “If I recall, I do believe the current king was the last to visit. How is he?”
“He’s seen better days,” Danny says as the butler begins to lead them inside the palace. Hopefully David will get some warmth. He can already feel his toes beginning to freeze and that is never a good thing. “His health isn’t what it used to be.”
“I can assume the twins will be vying for the crown?” The butler says. “I do hope Prince Jacob is given the throne. I very much like him better.”
“Everyone does..” David grumbles. Danny, once again, shoves his elbow into David's side and gives him a warning look.
The butler shows them around the palace and eventually brings them to the library where a fire is already burning inside the fireplace. Danny grabs David’s attention and nods his head towards the fireplace. David takes this opportunity and goes to warm himself up.
“This library holds all of the history of Winter. Everything you’ll need to know is right here in this room.” The butler turns on his heels and begins walking towards the door. “Please do make yourselves comfortable and I will send someone up with a warm drink for the young prince. Winter is never kind to Spring.”
“I couldn’t agree more..” David says as he shivers.
There was something about the fire. It made him feel lively and refreshed his body, but it was not the warmth filling his body but a different feeling. Strength and power–as if the fire longed to exist within him, to make its presence known.
Danny, who stood on the other side of the room and reading the titles on the spines of the books on the shelves, glances over at David. He’s frozen there, his eyes fully locked on the flickering flames. Something has its grip on David. Walking over to him, he notices something flickering in his hands. A small but warm glow. The warm beverage hadn’t been brought up yet so the fire’s light couldn’t be reflecting off of anything in his hand.
Stepping closer, he sees a small flame dancing within the palms of David’s hand. His eyes are still focused on the fire in front of him and not his hands.
Fire?
He can conjure fire?
Danny’s eyes widen and he quickly lunges for David’s hands, sizzling out the flames with his icy hands. David’s trance dissipates and he looks up at Danny. His eyebrows knit together. “Are the drinks here?”
Danny shakes his head and pulls his hands away from David. “No, not yet..”
“Well, let go of me so I warm up,” David chuckles. “Unlike you, I don’t do well with the cold–in case you haven’t picked up on that yet.”
“David.. I need to know..” Danny says as he sits down cross legged on the floor beside David. “Have you ever done that before?”
“Done what?” David says. “What did I do?”
“You..” Danny pauses and looks around to make sure no one had quietly slipped inside of the room. Once he knows that no one is around, he turns back to David. “You conjured up fire.. I saw it–in your hands.”
David’s eyebrows once more knit together and he shakes his head. “You’re nuts, Daniel. I didn’t do anything.”
“I know what I saw, David.” Danny says. “If you can conjure fire then that means..” Slowly his eyes grow wide and he pulls David off of the floor.
“Daniel, what are you doing?”
“There’s gotta be something here that talks about the war between Spring and Autumn.”
“I don’t understand,” David says as he begins to shiver again. “Can I please go back to fire?”
“No!” Danny snaps. He freezes in place when he sees a maid stepping into the room holding a tray with a steaming, hot cup of tea and freshly baked brownies. He quickly apologizes to her, making sure that she knew he wasn’t angry with her. She shyly nods her head and quickly leaves the room. Danny inhales deeply to calm himself before turning back to David. “You cannot, I repeat–cannot–repeat any of this to anyone.. That includes your brothers and your parents.”
He starts to shuffle through the books on the shelves until he finds a book spine labeled in a gold print. War: 1703-1705. “Aha!” He exclaims as he grabs the book. “There’s gotta be something in here that will say what really happened to start this war.” David walks over and peers over Danny’s shoulders, his eyes flickering over the pages as Danny whips through them. Clicking his tongue and reading through the pages, Danny skims his index finger down the page until he finds what he’s looking for. “Oh..”
“Oh?” David says from behind him. “What do you mean, by ‘oh’? What did you find?”
“Remember when I said that you cannot repeat any of this?”
“Yes?”
“I mean it.” Danny moves over and slides the book into David’s view. “The affair that I told you caused the war between the two realms?” David nods his head. “It was between the rogue healer and your mother..” David’s jaw falls slack. “What makes this even more ridiculous? This is all around the same time you were born. The war began when the affair was discovered in June of 1703. You were born–what, nine months later?”
“Ten..” David corrects him. Danny perks up his eyebrows. “Normally a woman’s gestation period is ten months.”
“How do you even know that?”
“I help out at the hospital occasionally and I’ve learned some things.”
Danny shakes his head. “Makes sense why you would be there–because if this is true, you’re a healer who can still conjure fire. You’d be a halfling.”
“A half-what?” David slides down into the chair next to Danny and leans against the table.
“Halfling.” Danny repeats. “It means you’re born of two realms–which rarely happens. Last time a halfling was born was over two hundred years ago. Born of Winter and Autumn–you can only imagine how well that went over. Fire and ice? Not a good combination.”
“At least the Autumn dweller is a healer, eh?” David winks.
Danny groans and smacks the palm of his hand to his forehead. Why have none of the brothers been born with any sense of humor? “Anyway..” Danny says, bringing the conversation back to the subject at hand.
“Okay, okay..” David says as he leans back in his chair. “So this means that I’m a halfling, made of Spring and Autumn and I can conjure fire and heal people?”
“Along with the powers of Spring.” Danny says.
“That makes sense now because I may or may not have healed Samuel yesterday.”
Danny slowly turns in his chair to face David. “You did what?”
“I kind of knew that I could..heal..people..”
“Did he even notice?”
David shakes his head. “He thinks that Joshua’s fencing sword never touched him–both him and Joshua think that.”
Danny raises his hands in the air before standing up from his chair. He begins pacing back and forth as he digs a hand into his curls. “Okay..” He sighs. “Here’s what we’re going to do.. We are not going to speak of this to anyone.”
“I think we’ve established that twice already–three times if you count just now.” David says, turning around in the chair and leaning his arm over it.
“Well that’s the first thing.. Second. Stay away from fire and stay away from the hospital. If someone, namely your brothers, gets injured again, it will stir up questions.”
“How so? They’d never notice..” David says. “Time tends to slow down when I do it.”
Danny’s eyes bug out of his head and his arms flail in the air. “SAMUEL WASN’T THE FIRST?!” He shouts. David slowly shakes his head as he sinks in on himself, beginning to feel the rage spilling from Danny’s pores. “That is incredibly dangerous, David!” He lowers his voice and steps closer to David. “If this gets out that you’re the halfling, this could be the start of another war, David…”
“I can’t control it half the time,” David says. “I get this feeling that someone is injured and they just kick into overdrive.”
Danny sighs and rubs the heel of his palms into his eyes and begins his pacing again. “Stop doing that.. Immediately.. Use natural remedies.”
“Are you seriously giving me a set of rules now, Daniel?”
Danny stops pacing and glares at David. “This is to protect you.”
“Protect me?” David stands up from his chair. “I don’t need protection! I’m tired of always being protected! I can handle this!” As he screams, the fire in the hearth grows bigger and bigger making Danny lunge himself at David.
“Look!” He says pointing to the fire. “This is why you have to stop! Not only will you be putting yourself in danger, but you’ll put someone else in danger!”
David simmers down and the fire simmers too. “I want to go home.”
“David–”
“I want to go home! Now!”
“But David, we need to–”
“We don’t need to do anything! I have a job to do with Joshua!”
David storms out of the library leaving Danny alone in the room. Grabbing the book, Danny stuffs it back into its place on the shelf before running out after David.
Ripple effects. They can make good things happen. Or in this case? Deadly things. Danny only hopes that David will listen and keep this contained.
_____________________________________________________
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Reasons for Waiting, Part Two
probably my most requested piece. gather your tissues. read part one before reading this.
word count: 2.7k
*
“You said you would wait for me, that was the loudest lie I’ve ever been told.”
“Okay, drama queen, just take your turn already,” Jake rolled his eyes at his older brother.
“Oh, guess who I ran into today,” Josh spoke slowly as he moved his Monopoly piece across the board, his eyes lulling to stare at Danny. Subtlety has never been in his genes.
“Who’s that?,” Danny spoke around the beer bottle raised to his lips.
“Y/N.”
A splatter of the liquid landed on the corner of Josh’s mouth, making him chuckle as he reached to wipe it. Sam reaching for a napkin to clean up the rest of the beer that had been spat out of Danny’s mouth.
“Like from home? Where the fuck did you see her? Is she here? In town? Where did you see her? What did you- what did she say?”
“I’d love to tell you all of the details, if you’d shut the fuck up, my beloved Daniel,” Josh laughed along with his brothers at the shock the simple confession had put Danny in. “I ran into her at Publix. She said she’s doing great, she’s in town visiting her fiancé. She’s still doing photography. She’s got purple hair. Lots of tattoos. This really cute nose ring,” Josh rambled on, waving his hands about.
Fiancé. Danny’s heart was sitting in his lap. He didn’t hear any of the other words Josh’s mouth was spewing out at him. Staring at his lips as he continued talking, all Daniel could hear was blood rushing in his head and the hammering of his heart. His body moved faster than his mind, scooting his chair back a little too aggressively as it slammed into the wall behind him. His legs carried him out the door, he leaned over the banister of Jake’s back patio, feeling lightheaded and nauseous.
What the fuck is wrong with me? I haven’t seen her in six years. I haven’t spoken to her in five years. Why do I care? Who the fuck is she engaged to? Did she have an engagement party? Did she think about inviting me? Will I be invited to the wedding? Holy fuck. A wedding. She’s going to get married. It won’t be me.
“Babe? What are you doing out here?,” her voice was shrill and it went ran a shiver down his spine. “Are you alright, what happened?” Her hands felt like flames against his skin, burning straight through his shirt.
“I don’t want to be with you.”
“Excuse me?,” her touch turning icy cold. “Like, you need some air, some space?”
He laughed, tearful and gruff, at how hopeful she sounded.
“No. Like I do not want to date you. It’s over, it’s done. I’m in love with someone else,” his voice was stern, even while it wavered as tears streaked his cheeks.
He let out a breath of relief when she left without another word. He didn’t have the strength to argue right now. A rush of wind blew through, Danny closed his eyes, leaning into it. The breeze drying his tears as the moonlight washed over him. He could picture it so vividly in his mind, your presence next to him.
------------------------------------------
He’s 18, it’s his last round of golf on the high school team. He’s oddly emotional, feeling stupid as his eyes begin to water. One glance over at the crowd and his eyes find you, your hand waving him toward you, the other reaching into your bag to get his sunglasses out. He jogs over, so grateful for your over packing tendencies. Slides the oversized glasses on, hiding his reddening eyes from the other players. A kiss to the back of your hand, and he’s back on the fairway.
He’s 16, his dad is behind him in the mirror, teaching him how to tie his tie. Dan is smiling at his son, his little boy is growing up. Junior prom came in the blink of an eye. Danny’s hands were shaking, growing more and more nervous as the minutes ticked by. He was awaiting your arrival with bated breath, knowing you would look the most beautiful in your dress. His heart stopped, his jaw dropped, his stomach hurt. The rose gold gown you wore caught the setting sunlight in the most glorious way. “Aphrodite,” he called you for the entire evening.
He’s 12, feeling what he could only explain as his first ‘real’ heartbreak. The girl he finally worked up the courage to ask to be his girlfriend had told everyone she only said yes as a joke. He hid in the gymnasium, skipping three classes in a row. The door swung open and he dropped between the bleachers, hoping it wasn’t a teacher and if it was, that they hadn’t seen him. “Daniel, come out of there,” his cheeks glowed red when he heard your voice. Lifting himself out of the bleachers, he saw you approaching him with the worried look of a mother on your face. “You can’t run away from all of your problems, you know?” He didn’t need to, just this one. You understood, and held him in your arms while he cried of how embarrassed he was. You skipped the rest of your classes for the day, walking home with him after the final school bell rang. You made sure he had a glass of water by his bed before you left him as he fell into his bed. His mother gave you a hug before you left, whispering in your ear “you will be such a good wife some day.”
He’s 7, sat huffing on the side walk with two skinned knees. Unsure if he’s crying because he’s angry, or angry because he’s crying. That stupid jerk from the 9th grade had pushed him while he was trying to skateboard, stealing his board and leaving him bloody and humiliated. He didn’t want to walk home, knowing his mom would give him the fifth degree for losing the board she didn’t even want to buy him in the first place. “I thought you were doing a good job before,” you muttered as you plopped yourself down next to him. “You’re better than that idiot, that’s probably why he took your board. So he could practice some more. He’s a loser.” He stared at you in confusion. “I’m Y/N, by the way,” he stared at your hand outstretched to him. “I’m Daniel. You can call me Danny, though.” He shook your hand.
He’s 24, understanding just how big of a mistake he had made with his life.
------------------------------------------
“Did she say where she was staying?,” Danny was panting, out of breath from crying harder as he ran back inside to find Josh again.
“Uh, not specifically. Just said her fiancé lived near the river. I’d guess those apartments by- hey, Dan, wait, don’t-“ Josh couldn’t finish his thought as Danny was sprinting out of the front door, jumping into his car.
He drove to the river, looking at GPS on his phone, seeing all of the apartment buildings in the area, all of the houses and condos, he felt his shoulders deflate with defeat and his eyes fill with tears once again.
A knock on his window startled him, his head springing up to look at the passenger side of his car.
“Daniel?”
“Holy fuck.”
“Hi, Daniel,” you laughed, mostly in disbelief as he scrambled out of his car.
“I missed you so fucking much,” he crushed you against his chest, fingers not able to sit still — squeezing into your sides, tangling into your hair, grasping at the back of your sweatshirt, like he thought you’d vanish if he let you break away from him.
“Yeah, I missed you too, Dan,” you did, that was true. The bitterness that you sat with for a while had vanished long ago. “It’s been so crazy to watch your career. I am so fucking proud of you,” you pushed him away from you to look into his eyes, showing him you really meant it.
“You have purple hair,” his eyes were roaming over your appearance, he’s taking so much in at once and he’s overwhelmed.
“Indeed I do, thanks for observing,” you laughed, pushing him further away from you. “Would you like to come in?” You waved your hand in the general direction of the apartment complex across the street.
Hm. Even with no address, no idea of where he was going or what he was looking for, he had found you. He felt proud of that, universal pull or intuition or soulmate attraction or something.
“I’d love to but- I don’t want to- Josh told me-” he didn’t want to say the words again.
“Josh told you that I’m engaged? What a fucking rat. Um, yeah, so, this is actually his apartment but he’s out of town so. Yeah, no worries about running into him or anything, if that’s what you’re worried about.”
He simply nodded, letting you lead the way.
“What were you doing in this area anyway? Josh said you live all the way on the other side of town,” you left him to get comfy on the couch as you grabbed some drinks from the kitchen.
“You asked him about me?,” he stared at the tattoo on your wrist as you handed him a beer. The letters scrolled honey across your skin.
“Okay, I know a lot of time has passed but I think I still know you pretty well and I know this conversation will go absolutely nowhere because your brain is scattered right now. So, ask what you want to ask. Say what you want to say. Get the elephant out of the room, okay?,” you could hardly look into his eyes, knowing he had been crying, wondering if you were the reason why his face was red and puffy.
“You’re engaged? Who is he?,” Danny was quick to spit it out, the question fucking killing him since he heard Josh utter the word.
“His name is Jason, he’s a wonderful guy. Everything you always told me I deserved. Here,” you scooted the photo album that lay on the coffee table closer to him. He realized he hadn’t even taken in his surroundings, snatching up the book and flipping it open so he could see who this man was.
“I didn’t tell Josh where I was staying,” you mumbled.
He left that unanswered as he thumbed through the photo book quickly, absorbing as much of these memories as he could, seeing so much of your life that he had missed out on.
“When did you guys meet?,” he needed to know how long this had been happening, somehow he thought that might ease the ache that was spreading in his chest.
“2018. He worked at the tattoo shop that I started going to, and he sat with me in the parking lot one night after a tattoo and we talked for hours. He wanted to know why I was in such a rush to change myself, asked about the word I had him put on my wrist,” your thumb mindlessly brushed over the area as you spoke. “I told him all about you.”
Danny’s eyes snapped up to meet yours, breaking away from watching the motion of your fingers. “What?”
“Well, it was you, after all,” you laughed. “God, I loved you so much Daniel. I really, truly thought it was going to be us. The day you told me you were leaving, I knew. I would never be enough. You were going to have this huge, spectacular life, and I’ve just been happy to see it from the sidelines. I really am proud of you,” you reached over to wipe his tears before you wiped your own, forever putting him before yourself.
“It is us, honey. I swear it is. That’s why I found you tonight,” a sob fell out of his mouth, “I love you. I love you so much and I always have and I’m so fucking sorry I let you go. I should have never sent that last message, it wasn’t what I wanted but I thought it was best and now I’m a fucking wreck because you’re engaged and I can’t watch you marry someone that isn’t me.”
The silence the two of you sat in was full of pain, yearning, regret, and worst of all - disconnect.
“Daniel, I’m in love with Jason. I haven’t been in love with you in a long time. You coming here and making these statements isn’t going to change that, honey.”
“Can I come?,” his voice was weak, he sounded like a child just shot down from getting his favorite treat.
“To the wedding? You don’t want that, Daniel,” your voice was still full of intent, getting your point across, but shaking as you let your emotions take root.
“You think you aren’t enough for me?”
“What?,” you let out a light laugh at his not so subtle questioning. His mind truly is everywhere and nowhere tonight.
“That’s what you said, a minute ago. You said you knew you would never be enough. You’re wrong. So fucking wrong it’s despicable. You’re everything. You were too good for me, always were too good for me. From the first day we met and you cared more than my own mother about my banged up knees and making sure I wasn’t upset about what that dick Greg O’Connell said to me- you cared about me. Far more than I ever deserved, honestly. Far more than I ever showed you how much I cared. I did, though, I do. I always will care so much about you. I’ll always find you, GPS be damned. Your soul rests with mine and that is something no one can ever take from me. He can take you, marry you, make a family with you. But your soul will always be for me. We’ll find each other again. Maybe the next trip around the Sun. I want to go to the wedding, I want to know and feel that pain, let it hurt enough that I remember it the next time. In the next life, I’ll remember that knife in my fucking chest and I’ll never be selfish enough to let you go again.”
------------------------------------------
As much as everyone, yourself included, agreed it was a bad idea, the following summer you invited Danny and the guys to the wedding. They sat third row from the back on your side, they cheered the loudest when you kissed your husband for the first time. Never able to mistake Josh’s loud whoops or Jake’s wolf whistle for anyone else. As you walked down the aisle to your future, you locked eyes with Daniel. The smile on his face was genuine. So were the tears rolling down his face. You scrunched your nose at him, he returned it immediately. A signal through the years of silently saying I love you, and in this case a thank you for all of the years passed and growth done.
Three weeks later, you sat on the floor of your living room watching a shuffling playlist of music videos on YouTube, sifting through and opening gifts that were left for you and your husband at your wedding. A stack of blank thank you cards sat on the coffee table, writing a personalized one for every person. Opening a sky blue gift bag, pulling out the white stuffing paper, your eyes landed on a white card envelope first. Only your name scrolled across the front, you opened it to begin reading- interrupted by a quick glance toward the TV where ‘Light My Love’ by Greta Van Fleet just begun to play.
Beneath it, encased still in the original plastic box, the boutonniere that he donned the night of Junior prom. A pink rose, dusted with gold, now dried and partially crumbled. You hugged it to your chest, rising from your spot on the floor and wandering to the bookshelves across the room. Ever so gently, as not to jostle it anymore, you reached up on your tip toes to place the gift on the shelf. Right next to the framed photo of yourself and Daniel at graduation.
#danny#danny wagner#danny wagner fic#danny wagner angst#danny wagner blurb#daniel wagner#daniel r wagner#daniel robert wagner#gvf#gvf fic#gvf blurb#gvf angst#greta van fleet#greta van fleet blurb#greta van fleet angst#greta van fleet fic
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East Bound and Down. Jake Kiszka x Reader
An angsty little 2.7k to fix the lack of Jakey on my blog!! And yes this is inspired by a Grey's Anatomy episode mind your business
A/N: contains themes of dangerous driving, car accidents, concussions, hospitals, injuries, a jail stay, etc.
Tags: Angst
Phone calls from Jake were your favorite thing in the world. Whether he was at home or on tour, just hearing his voice when he’d answer the phone saying “hey, baby” would always ease your worried mind.
But the night that Jake’s number and pretty face popped up on your screen, and you answered it to hear a woman asking you if you were Ms. Y/N L/N, Jacob Kiszka’s emergency contact, you started dreading his calls.
You had driven to the hospital in a haze, which is ironic- because reckless driving is exactly what landed Jake there in the first place. The 15 minutes it took you to get there felt like hours. The kind nurse on Jake’s phone told you that he was okay- a concussion, a broken nose and stitches in his eyebrow from the airbag. Nothing permanent.
Nothing permanent. Nothing permanent. Nothing permanent. You repeated it like a mantra in your head as you took deep breaths, preparing to see Jake battered and bloodied in a hospital bed. The thought alone had made your stomach lurch.
“Y/N L/N?” A nurse asked when you frantically told Jake’s name to the receptionist in the emergency room, and you had nodded gratefully when he assured you that Jake was doing just fine, they were just keeping him for observations for a few more hours since he had lost consciousness during the accident.
The queasiness you felt at that statement must have been visible on your face, because the kind nurse steadied you by your elbow before opening the door to Jake’s room, allowing you to enter alone.
Immediately, you thought you were going to throw up. Jake had his eyes closed, and you could see-even from across the room-the deep purple bruising under his eyes from his broken nose. A deep gash, probably 15 stitches across, cut through his right eyebrow.
The sound of you closing the door behind you alerted Jake to your presence, but you could tell from his pinched expression either the lights or his injuries-or both-were causing him some distress.
Faster than you had ever moved, you were at his side. “Oh, Jake.” You whispered, gently sitting at the edge of his bed and running a hand so carefully through his hair, opposite the side of his forehead wound.
“Hey, baby.” Jake answered with his eyes closed, his voice sounding as mangled as he looked. His hand reached out to hold yours and he gave it a quick squeeze. That, coupled with his standard greeting, opened the floodgates for you.
As you sobbed quietly and scanned over Jake, he assured you that he was alright. “I’m fine, love. Really, just a bit scratched up.” You could tell that he was groggy from the pain meds, and the lights were too bright, but being in his presence alone was enough for the moment.
“What were you thinking?” You whispered. Jake didn’t answer your question. Instead he closed his eyes again and gave a deep sigh. “Jake…” you implored him. “How fast were you going?”
“Babe… now?” Was the only response you got.
That night, you decided to let it go. Everyone had their vices, especially rock stars. You supposed you were thankful that Jake’s vices weren’t laced drugs or other women. Jake’s vice was fast cars.
For the three weeks that followed, Jake played along while you waited on him hand-and-foot. You drove to the grocery store and to dinner dates, you two would walk to the bars to meet the guys, or someone would pick up Jake for band rehearsals.
But as time went on, Jake was cleared to drive, his concussion healed fine. All that was left of that night was a little scar above his eyebrow. And you know what they say about vices.
Little by little, Jake started driving places again. “Just down the road for a coffee run, babe. Won’t be gone 20 minutes.” He’d get in his souped up new car and take off without a care in the world, while you sat at home and waited for another phone call that would turn your life upside down.
Life continued that way for a while with no incidents, but every time your phone would ring and Jake’s name would pop up on your screen, it killed you a little inside that your first flash of emotion was panic and worry instead of joy or excitement.
And then, Jake got the speeding ticket. He was late to your anniversary dinner. It wasn’t ideal, the way your work schedules fell, so you planned to meet at your favorite restaurant separately. But after sitting alone for 40 minutes, you began to panic.
Eventually, Jake rumbled into the restaurant looking guilty and wielding a paper ticket. “I’m so sorry I’m late, love. I got pulled over. I would’ve been here extra early if that fucker hadn’t got me.” He said with a smirk, trying to make light of the situation.
The only thing on your mind, though, was seeing how fast Jake had been going. You snatched the ticket out of his hand and scanned it over before he could stop you.
115 in a 75.
You could feel the color draining from your face. “Jake…” your tone was icy. “Are you trying to get yourself killed?”
When you looked up from the ticket, Jake was sitting across the table from you. And he had the audacity to roll his eyes at what you said. “Oh, come on, babe. It’s just a speeding ticket.”
Your jaw dropped open like you were a cartoon character. “Are you fucking kidding me, Jake?! Last time you ended up in the hospital!”
You knew your voice was too loud for the intimate restaurant, but you were incredibly upset that Jake seemed to have to value his life or your emotional wellbeing.
In fact, he looked much more disturbed that you were causing a scene in the intimate little restaurant. Looking around like some paparazzi was going to pop out and take a photo, Jake leaned in and whisper-yelled, “Can we tone it down in here, babe?”
“You know what, no!” You stood up. The screech that your chair made against the floor made your spine tingle, and the other patrons were definitely staring now.
“Y/N, where are you going?” Jake asked you, not even standing up from his chair, head in his hands.
“I’m going to drive my car home at a reasonable speed. I hope you make it home in your car alive, you asshole.” You hold Jake’s glare for another few seconds before turning on your heel and walking out of the restaurant.
As you get into your car and buckle your seatbelt, your resolve holds strong. If Jake wants to act like an irresponsible immature child, let him!
But as you begin driving home, your resolve begins to crack.
The deadly look in his eye as you walked out on him told you that Jake was angry. And when Jake was angry, he liked to drive even faster.
Fuck, fuck, fuck. The whole ride home, you were thinking to yourself, ‘what if the last words I ever said to the love of my life were calling him an asshole.’
As you begin to panic, you decide to call him through the car. Once, twice, three times, he doesn’t answer your call. You know he wouldn’t have stayed by himself at the restaurant. So he’s probably out somewhere over 100 right now, and it’s your fault.
When you pull into your side of the garage and enter the house, you try his phone again. This time it goes straight to voicemail. The bile immediately begins rising in your throat.
For the next four hours you pace around the house until you fall into a restless sleep on the living room couch. At 1am, Jake strolls through the front door casually, and you bolt out of your sleep.
“You’re okay?” You ask, kind of disoriented but still relieved.
“Why wouldn’t I be?” Jake deadpans, bypassing you on the couch to head to the kitchen.
You sigh and begin heading toward the bedroom, at least thankful that he was home safe for the night. Even if he’s mad at you, he’s here.
It takes Jake another two hours to get in bed next to you. You hadn’t been sleeping deeply anyway, so you’re aware of it when he leans over and presses a whiskey-scented kiss onto your shoulder. He whispers “I’m sorry, love.”
You roll to face him, and in his slightly inebriated state, he’s obviously surprised that you’re awake. You gently take his stupid beautiful face in your hands and whisper “You should be.”
He gives you a soft half-smile and a kiss goodnight.
You talk it out in the morning over coffee. Jake knows that he’s driving too fast. He knows the anxiety that it causes you. He promises you that he’ll stop. And then it happens again.
You’re at work this time. It’s early afternoon on a Friday when the call comes in. Not from Jake’s phone, but from the county police. Immediately you scramble outside to answer it in a panic, but you already know what this is.
“Excuse me, are you Mr. Kiszka’s emergency contact?”
You sigh deeply and thank the sheriff, telling him you’ll be there, before making your way back inside the office. Once you get back to the desk, you pack up your work bag and plan on finding your boss to tell them about your little emergency.
However, an idea hits you.
At all hours of every day that Jake isn’t within arms reach of you, you are worried about him. You can’t get any work done. You can’t think, eat, rest.
Does it make you the worst partner in the world to leave Jake there for a little while? Or will it make him understand just how much you worry about him when he’s gone?
Eventually you decide that an hour or two won’t hurt. The entire time you’re wracked with guilt, thinking of your pretty boyfriend behind bars in some dingy county sheriff's office, but you remind yourself that you know where he is right now, he’s safe.
Two hours turns into the rest of your work day, and you even go home and change first. You got the call at 1pm, and it’s 7pm by the time the Sheriff is shaking your hand and leading you back to Jake.
You wring your hands nervously as he takes you toward the little cell. Immediately you can tell Jake is the only one in there, which you’re thankful for.
When he sees the Sheriff, his eyes light up. And then he sees you, and the different emotions flash by so quickly that it’s difficult to read. Relief, anguish, anger, hurt, betrayal.
“You are free to go, Mr. Kiszka.” The Sheriff says, sliding open the cell door. “Car’s in the impound, though.”
Jake quietly says his thank-yous to the officer before he makes eye contact with you for the first time. He looks over your face with the most hurt expression you’ve ever seen him wear. Then he nods once towards the exit and doesn’t wait for you as he starts walking.
“Jake-” you begin. From in front of you, he holds one hand up in the air, signaling that he’d like you to stop talking. The sting of being ignored causes you to bite your tongue until you reach your car.
As Jake climbs into the passenger side, you try again. “Baby, I-” but once again, he cuts you off. “No. Y/N, just don’t.” You nod your head shallowly and buckle in. The entire ride home is silent.
When you make it back to the house, Jake gets out and lets himself in the house, not holding the door for you. He immediately gets in the shower and stays there for over an hour. While he’s in there, you make a quick dinner and pour Jake a glass of whiskey next to his plate.
Eventually, he does come down- if only because he must be starving. He won’t look at you, but he does eye the dinner and the stiff drink. You decide you won’t talk until he’s ready. Getting him to eat will be a good start.
The dinner table feels like it’s a mile long as the two of you eat in complete, uncomfortable silence. Once Jake’s plate is cleared, he pushes it forward but makes no motion to get up. Instead he just swirls his drink and sips it slowly.
His voice scares you when he finally speaks. “I cannot fucking believe you left me there.”
You bite the inside of your lip but hold your ground. Sure, you feel guilty, but you did it with good reason. Your voice is soft but sure when you speak. “You know why I did, Jake.”
He scoffs and takes a large gulp of the whiskey, wincing as it goes down. “Please, enlighten me, Y/N.” Jake says sarcastically.
Now, you’re getting frustrated. “You have no idea why I might have left you there, Jake?!”
“Other than to be a massive bitch?”
You recoil at his words as if he’d actually physically struck you. You and Jake were passionate and had your fair share of arguments, but they never got nasty like this.
You sat as still as a statue as his words replayed in your head. You could see the regret in his eyes as well as soon as he said them.
“Baby, I’m-”
“No, Jacob.” You let the slow fat tears roll down your cheeks without bothering to wipe them away as you stood up from your chair.
“I won’t apologize to you for keeping you in a safe place for a day so I could get some work done and not worry about you wrapping your car around a tree.”
You begin clearing yours and Jake’s plates from dinner, working on autopilot to keep your hands busy as you spoke. Jake fluttered around you as you moved around the kitchen. “If me wanting to keep you safe makes me a bitch, then I’m the biggest bitch in the world.” You shrug.
With the toss of a dish towel, you retreat out of the kitchen, at a loss for how else to explain this to Jake. You were teary-eyed and exhausted.
At the bottom of the stairs, you feel Jake’s arms around your waist. You’re too tired to fight him off when he whispers “I never should have called you that word, my love. I didn’t mean it. I don’t.”
You appreciate the apology, but you still don’t think he understands the weight of his actions and why you did what you did.
So you brush his arms off your waist and continue up the stairs to your bedroom, forgoing any nightly routine and just getting under the covers of your bed.
Jake follows behind you. You watch him as he strips down and enters the bed next to you. With a questioning glance, you nod and decide to let him hold you in the silence. At least your Jake is here with you now.
A long stretch passes where Jake simply looks at you. He takes in your exhaustion, your anxiety, your guilt.
A while later, Jake whispers in the dark, “I understand.”
You let go of an exhale you didn’t know you had been holding and turn to look at his face. “I worry about you constantly, Jake. I’m always thinking I’m gonna get a call and you’re gonna be dead.”
At this, Jake wraps you even tighter in his arms. His expression looks guilty and pained. He kisses your forehead and tells you, “I’ll never leave you alone, baby.”
You crane your neck up to kiss his jaw. “We can’t control everything, but you can control how fast you drive, Jake. Please.” In an impossibly tighter embrace, Jake tells you, “I promise.”
#greta van fleet#gvf#greta van fleet imagine#greta van fleet fanfic#greta van fleet angst#jake kiszka#jacob kiszka#jake kiszka imagine#jake kiszka fanfic#jake kiszka fanfiction#jake kiszka angst#jake kiszka x reader
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be my baby | s.f.k
good morning!! happy Friday the 13th ! normally on these days nothing really happens to me but earlier when I was making breakfast I was adding a tiny bit of salt and then a big glob just plopped out onto my eggs and I just 🚶🏻♀️🚶🏻♀️🚶🏻♀️
anyway I hope everyone has a lovely day, I’m off to buy menstrual necessities despite the fact that I don’t want to leave my house but sadly, I must. This feels like a mini written vlog of me just over sharing and I like it
alsoooooo
MASSIVE thank you to everyone that has taken the time to read, like, comment, reblog, etc. any of my posts. truly makes me happy to see you guys enjoying the shit I cook up in my head 🤍
anyway this is long enough already SO
since I’ve written a good amount of angst I think it’s time to come back to the fluff
enjoy, my lovelies 😌
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When Sam was asked where he saw himself in five years, his answer always remained the same.
“Married, maybe a baby, definitely more dogs.” he would answer confidently every time, the biggest smile on his face.
When he met you, everything was amplified by a thousand.
It was love at first sight for him, no other girl in the world mattered to him except you. He’d kiss your feet if needed be, if there was a puddle he would let you walk on his back all to not get your shoes wet. He cherished the ground you walked on, always praising you and showering you with his love every chance he’d get. He gave you anything and everything you ever wanted, he was every girls dream.
And you were completely and utterly in love with him.
He did everything right, since the beginning. He treated you like a princess, insisted it was the least you deserved despite it being before your time as a couple. He treated you as if you were the rarest form of gold there ever was, much too valuable to ever be tainted and far too worthy of just any regular man. But Sam wasn’t just any regular man to you, which was why he was over the moon to have been the chosen one when it came to your affection.
When you had first met he was the one that had been instantly pining over you, though you had made it clear you only wanted to be friends. That didn’t stop him, not even close, if anything it motivated him even more. It was in his blood to never give up, you had come to find out after meeting his brothers.
“It’s a Kiszka thing,” his brothers had said, giving you the biggest and brightest smiles as if to say “you might as well give in now”.
But you had to admit, you loved the chase. You relished in the feel of being wanted by someone in such a pure and intimate way. Though it wasn’t much of a chase really, as he managed to all but tackle you at the 7 month long finish line. You gave in, once you realized the butterflies that fluttered in your tummy at the mere thought of him were never going to go away. They never once did throughout those 7 months, and they never did for the next 4 years.
Throughout your relationship he always kept you on your toes. Treating you to this and buying you that, cooking you this and singing you that. You did everything together, and neither of you would ever dream of getting tired of the other.
One of your favorite things to do together was listen to music in the comfort of your cozy living room, a random record spinning in the corner as you built a puzzle together. The others laughed at the two of you, but it wasn’t in mockery, except for the teasing comments saying how old you guys behaved when you were only in your early twenties. But it was an activity the both of you enjoyed. You enjoyed going out and getting drinks with everyone every once in a while, but lately the two of you had been loving just staying home, making dinner together then moving to the living room, one of you picking a puzzle and the other picking a record. The way it was decided who got what job, was through a good ol trusty game of rock, paper, scissors.
“Ready to lose?” you teased, getting into position.
Sam scoffed, rolling his eyes mumbling what sounded like ‘as if’ under his breath before beginning the countdown.
“Rock, paper, scissors, shoot!”
Your hand flew out into the motion of scissors, while Sam’s hand went out flat on his palm. He pouted as you stuck your tongue out at him.
“No fair,” he mumbled. “Best two out of three!”
You rolled your eyes but resumed your position. “Rock, paper, scissors, shoot!”
And you beat him, again.
You giggled as he got ready for the last and final round, mumbling words of encouragement to himself only to lose all over again. Your head was thrown back in laughter as he pouted even more than before, arms crossed over his chest even going so far as to throwing a stomp of his foot into the mix. He always enjoyed picking the music, wanting to show you something new he had found on one of the many record store adventures you had both gone on, or ones with just him and the boys. Most of the time he would win, but tonight luck was on your side and you made sure to flaunt your win in his face as much as you could as you all but skipped over to the record player to pick the music for the night.
You sifted through your shared record collection, majority of them belonging to Sam but you had added a good amount to the mix. Doing a little happy dance as you found the one you were looking for, you slipped it out of the sleeve and popped it onto the record player, setting the needle in place before making your way to the center of the room where Sam was waiting for you, the puzzle he had picked out already opened and laid out on the coffee table.
“What did you pick?” Sam asked as you took a seat across from him.
“You’ll see.” you said with a smile as you began to sort through the puzzle pieces.
He didn’t press any further and you two began flipping the pieces over, connecting what you matched along the way. The beginning notes of the first song began to play, and Sam snapped his head up from the table to give you a knowing look. You gave him a big cheesy grin, and he couldn’t help but match it as he rolled his eyes playfully, shaking his head.
“You and this damn record,” he said, turning his gaze back to the puzzle.
The record you had picked was the soundtrack to Dirty Dancing. It was one of your favorite movies ever, and the soundtrack was absolutely perfect. It didn’t take long for Sam to realize it was your favorite, as it was the only movie you ever wanted to watch and you played the record any chance you’d get. You would spin it as you cooked dinner, pausing in between to pull him to dance with you. He loved pretending like he hated it, but he secretly loved it. You would catch him swaying to the music, tapping his fingertips on his knees to the beat, and he always wore the biggest smile as he spun you around the kitchen to the music.
“Oh hush,” you said. “You love it.”
He simply hummed, but the smile remained on his face as he snuck occasional glances at you while you worked quietly on the puzzle, listening to the music as you enjoyed each others presence. You continued working on your puzzle, which was one you realized you had never built before.
“Where did you get this puzzle?” you asked Sam after a while. “I’ve never seen it and it’s hard.”
The last part came out with a pout, making him smile, though he didn’t offer much information about the puzzle, simply saying he had found it on the shelf. You had been at it for what felt like ages, but really it had only been about 30 minutes, the damn puzzle was only half way finished. It normally didn’t take this long for you to build a puzzle, but this one was extremely hard as all of the pieces were black. When the light would hit them at a certain angle certain colors would pop up, but for the most part it was all black.
You let out a sigh as you pushed a few pieces away from you and towards the center of the table, and just as you were opening your mouth to complain an all too familiar tune sounded through the record player and you let out a squeal of excitement instead. You shot up from your spot on the carpet, stepping over towards Sam with your hand held out.
“Dance with me.” you said to him, to which made him let out a groan as you dragged him up and off of the carpet.
He wrapped his arms around your waist as you brought yours up and around his neck, tucking your head into his chest as you swayed to the sounds of Otis Redding.
These arms of mine
They are lonely
Lonely, and feeling blue
These arms of mine
They are yearning
Yearning from wanting you
And if you
Would let them hold you
Oh, how grateful I will be
You continued to sway to the song, and you kept on dancing as the next song played. It was the song that played during the love scene, and Sam knew, which was why he attempted to dip you the way they do in the movie, almost dropping you and him onto the ground as he did so. You were both a giggly mess as you straightened back up. You danced to the remainder of the song, but near the end you decided to go back to the puzzle.
You felt a tug on your hand as you turned to sit back down, and you turned to face Sam.
“One more,”
You gave him a look, he was never the one to initiate any of the dancing especially to this record. Normally he’d be the one itching to go and sit down, but not tonight. You grinned happily and resumed your position, tucking yourself into his chest as he held your intertwined hands close to his chest. As the next song began to play, you felt him begin to sway the two of you once more. You felt him lean down a little, feeling his warm breath on your ear, tickling as he began to sing.
The night we met I knew I
Needed you so
And if I had the chance I’d
Never let you go
So won’t you say you love me?
I’ll make you so proud of me
We’ll make them turn their heads
Every place we go
So won’t you please
Be my little baby
Say you’ll be my darling
Be my baby now
Oh, oh, oh, oh
The smile that took over your face as he sang one of your favorite tracks to you was one so big you were afraid it would all but fall off of your face. He had sang to you before, but not like this. This time it felt different, more intimate, like it was coming from him with some sort of underlying message. You couldn’t figure out what it was so you didn’t give those theories much thought, you simply cuddled into him more and let him sway you as he continued singing the rest of the song.
I’ll make you happy, baby
Just wait and see
For every kiss you give me
I’ll give you three
Oh, since the day I saw you
I have been waiting for you
You know I will adore you
Until eternity
You stayed in each others arms as the song came to an end, and when it did you turned your head upwards to face Sam, only to find him already looking down at you.
“What was all that for?” you asked, leaning in to his touch as he brought his hands to each of your cheeks, holding you in place. He simply shook his head with a smile before leaning down to capture your lips in a kiss. You felt your body melting into his, the same effect his kisses have had on you since the first one you shared. Which felt much like this one. Soft, yet firm, warm and filled with equal parts love and passion. Every time he kissed you it was nothing short of love that poured through his lips and into you, but this kiss in particular felt very different. You pulled away after some time as your lungs needed air, and without much else of a word he pulled you over to the coffee table where you were meant to finish the puzzle. You were so dazed from the kiss that you weren’t of much help, but a comment from Sam had you snapping out of your thoughts.
“All done!”
You blinked, one, two, three times as you settled your eyes on the now completed puzzle in front of you.
“How the hell did you do that?” you asked, your mouth slightly open due to your shock.
“One of my other many talents I guess,” he answered smugly, giving a small shrug of his shoulders.
You smiled at how cute he was, even when he was boasting about the many talents you already knew he had. You moved your eyes down to the puzzle, not seeing anything special except a full picture in black.
“So...what am I looking at exactly?” you asked, causing Sam to stand up excitedly to shut the lights off.
“You have to hold a black light to it,” he spoke, switching the lights off before he made his way back over to you.
You felt his presence behind you, his legs pressed against your back and you jumped slightly when something that resembled the feel of a flashlight was positioned in your hands.
“Okay, on the count of three shine the line on the table,” he instructed, and you voiced your understanding.
“1...2...3!”
You flicked the light on and shone it on the table, taking notice of how the once upon a time all black puzzle was now lit up, displaying different neon colored letters. You furrowed your brows in confusion, but before you could say anything you felt Sam’s hand come around and grip the wrist that was holding the flashlight, and he positioned it at the top left corner.
“Start here,” he spoke quietly.
You followed his instructions, and went about shining the light from left to right, revealing a few words as you went.
“Will.....you,” you read aloud, moving the flashlight down and over once again. “...marry,”
You gasped, your eyes widening as your eyes trailed over the rest, but it was another voice that had spoke the last word.
“Me,”
You turned to face Sam, who had moved over to switch the lights back on once you finished reading. He was now down on one knee behind you, a ring clasped between his thumb and pointer finger as he held it against his chest, specifically over his heart.
“Be my baby,” he spoke again, and you couldn’t help but smile as he quoted the song. “And do me the wonderful honor of marrying me.”
You felt your knees shaking, your lip trembling and your vision went blurry as the tears spilled from your eyes. You took a step towards him, looking down at him as he looked up at you with nothing but love filled hopeful eyes.
“Abso-fucking-lutely!” you all but squealed, throwing your arms around his neck as you tackled him onto the floor.
His loud laugh was the only thing heard for miles and miles, you imagined. You laughed along with him but it was more of a cry laugh as you sobbed within the arms of your now fiancé. You gasped at the thought and felt him pull you up into a sitting position, holding your hand in his. It took a few tries to get the ring on, both of your hands equally as shaky but once it was on it was staying on. You stared down at it in awe, then back up at Sam, complete and utter disbelief written on your expression.
“That puzzle wasn’t actually just on the shelf, huh?” you asked.
He shook his head no with a big smile. “I ordered it a few weeks ago, I’m surprised you hadn’t noticed it sitting there this whole time but I’m glad you didn’t.”
Your heart fluttered in your chest at his confession, hearing that he had this planned for weeks now made the butterflies in your tummy flutter like never before.
He pulled you into another hug, this time giving you a spin around the room, your laughs bouncing of the walls as the room was filled with nothing but love and adoration. Once he came to a stop your wrapped your legs around his waist, your hands coming to sit on both his cheeks, thumbs lightly caressing his face.
“What are you thinking?” he whispered.
You smiled, leaning in to give him a gentle kiss. Your kisses trailed over towards his cheek then back once more to his lips before you pulled back.
“Will you be my baby?”
He grinned as you repeated his words back to him, and you watched in adoration as he happily shook his head.
“Your one and only, baby.”
---------
y’all i’m an absolute WHORE for dirty dancing the sound track is TOP TIER i just had to incorporate this now excuse me while i go bawl my eyes out at the movie
#gvf#gvf blurb#gvf fluff#greta van fleet#greta van fleet fic#greta van fic#greta van fleet fluff#greta van fleet angst#sam kiszka#sam gvf#sam kiszka fanfic#sam kiszka fluff#sam kiszka angst#sam kiszka smut#danny wagner#danny gvf#danny wagner fluff#danny wagner x y/n#danny wagner x reader#jakekiszka#jakegvf#jake kiszka fanfic#jake kiszka fluff#jake x reader#joshkiszka#josh gvf#josh kiszka x reader#josh kiszka fluff#joshkiszkaxreader#josh kiszka fanfiction
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