Fiona Apple at a party sometime around 1999

i'm drunk off two lavender martinis what the fuck do you MEAN dan and phil went on a step by step recreation of their japan trip as a part of a HONEYMOON episode for their sims. be so fr rn be so serious please. dan howell you have 4 minutes to respond . phil, keep it up babygirl. lavender martini recipe in the tags

The Glass Coffin Mocktail! In honor of my most beloved and favorite Saw trap 5ever :)

there's gonna be a big report in a few years revealing that they put molly in this shit because there's no other way water can be this good

My fave qpr fuckin ever omg

Thx for giving me a new thing to cry abt /pos @ali-flaion

The silly

You cannot tell me that Ice didn't at least once call Mav during a meeting and telling him to behave because he's on speaker, only for Mav to answer with 'Or what, you'll spank me?' with his whole chest to a room full of high-ranking members of the US navy.

solomon: mc.

mc: what’s up?

solomon, gesturing to a large collection of bottles in the corner: what is that?

mc: oh, it’s exam week.

solomon: and???

mc: you really think i’d do any of my exams sober?

I dunno why but I feel like Gepard can handle liquor. Like Sampo has the gift of bein smart knowin his limits and what to drink and when, so he gives off the vibe of being able to handle a lot but he's not that heavyweight. He's jus big brain conman XD. Get enough in him n he'll go down like the rest.

But Geppie. Man's sippin vodka from the bottle and not even slurrin his words. When he was a trainee the older guards decided to prank him with a glass of absinthe n called it a weak alcohol only for him to get halfway and not even bat an eye, only stopped cuz it tasted like ass. Dude takes the path of preservation seriously. Even his liver is beyond destruction XD.

Which is why I find two situations very freakin funny, which I'd love your opinion on:

1) Sampo starts up a drinking competition with him. It's on one of his guardian mandated holidays, so Gepard doesn't have to be responsible, and Dove 3 in 1 won't leave him alone anyway, so he agrees. Partway thru Sampo realises he's losin but Gep insists on gettin the drinks so he can't even cheat his way to victory. Cue Gep having to drag a very drunk, incredibly flirty Sampo back to Natasha but he keeps running off. Even being drunk doesn't stop him from havin smoke bombs up the wazoo.

2) Sampo manages to cheat, scheme, girlboss his way to victory. He comes out on top but now has the problem of an incredibly drunk, dangerously curious Silvermane Captain who won't stop flooding him with the oddest of questions. "Why are your eyes so green? Is your hair natural? What happened to the rest of your shirt? Do you really enjoy crime or is it jus something you fell into?" Whi- okay that one was oddly specific and he doesn't have the capacity, as tispy as he is, to answer.

He really needs to get him back home, before he asks the wrong person the wrong question, but isn't cognitive enough to face being questioned by Bronya and would sooner die than face Serval. So he opts into takin him to one of his more obvious hideouts which poses 10 million problems in and of itself when he keeps freakin touching everything!

ANON YOURE RIGHT YOURE A FUCKING. GENIUS. I been thinkin bout this A LOT ACTUALLY prob cuz for some reason fandom seems to lean towards gepard bein a horrific lightweight (i mean i know Why the lightweight trope is very much seen as 'cute' and childlike n whatever but i digress). But tbhtbhtbh i agree w u 100% like.

Gepard is a Tank of a Man. Homie can handle anything. Mfer the living embodiment of preservation like dude could be like 'serval this drink sucks' and hes gulping down perfume, unaffected. Dudes prob ate weird shit out on the front lines n questionable rations. The stuff in his fridge is expired n hes jus shrugging and eating it anyways.

I think w sampo its like. He SEEMS like he can handle his liquor. And hes not bad w it. But hes an Actor. Mfer could be plastered and you wouldnt know. Dude could convince a breathalyzer that hes only a Little Tipsy. But theres a threshold for him where he jus Caves at some points. Like u said tho man is Always competent w bombs. Like drunken boxing but w daggers dude could be blown over by a gentle breeze but still kicks ass.

I imagine that gepard doesnt Usually drink in that he jus. Doesnt care much. But absolutely his drink of choice is the hard shit. He jus has whiskey w ice or vodka w tonic water like a freak. Maybe a white russian if hes feelin zesty. When his guards convince him to go to the bar n challenge him to take shots he shrugs n jus packs them back no big deal.

But oh my god like. The 2nd scenario. I imagine it in order like first sampo realizing gepard has an Inhuman tolerance n making it his missiom to get the good ol captain fucked up. N it takes a while but like. Gepard jus gets more... blunt. But in a strange soft questioning way where he asks the things he wonders bout but never says aloud. The kinda soul reads like 'sampo youre a criminal not because you need to be but because you enjoy the thrill and attention right?' N sampo is just like holy fuck. But its like his inhibitions are gone and hes so Curious about everything and everything. He hangs onto sampos every word n it drives sampo crazy

men being all about beer is kinda pussy like what are u doin with this 5% alcohol beverage.very inefficient sir

I've been sleeping on qiurong. This ship is so good

Just had the fun idea of the batfam having water bottles full of lazarus water that they carry around and like, them customizing them. Drawing on the metal in Damian's case, covering them in stickers in both Tim's and Steph's case, weaving a hand warmer for the handle, etc Just each of them having their own thermos of sorts for patrol and missions with the Justice League outside of Gotham.

Check out @phoenixcatch7 , this au is a combination of mine and hers (Possessed Doll Au) and you should go give her love <3

Pineberry Pineapple Mint Cooler (Vegan)

Grapefruit, Thyme & Elderflower Cocktail !

Ingredients:

3 oz. vodka divided (gin works too) 2 ruby red grapefruits 2 tsp. elderflower cordial divided, syrup ice cubes sparkling water 1 small bunch thyme

Instructions:

Using two stemless wine glasses, pour 1.5 oz of vodka into each. Using a glass juicer or using your hands, squeeze juice from each grapefruit then pour evenly into each glass. Add 1 tsp. of elderflower cordial into each glass, along with a handful of ice cubes. Top with sparkling water and garnish with a sprig of thyme.

Courtesy: The Girl On Bloor

Photography: Taylor Stinson

This article was not sponsored or supported by a third-party. A Cocktail Moment is not affiliated with any individuals or companies depicted here. 

sometimes i wonder about him~🎃

"I do"

The flowers represent rage, betrayal and vengeance. They are snapdragons, chrysanthemums and black dahlias. I hate O'laugling I'm glad he's dead