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#very big 'dont talk to me or my son' energy
pigdemonart · 1 year
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Battle Subway Depot Agents (by pig-demon)
When I made designs for these guys last year I didn’t really think they needed colored references/master post, but since then I’ve drawn them a lot! Also people have added them to their fanfics and drawn fanart! So I figured it was time I made a post for easy ref. :]
These designs are obviously free to use, just give credit (and link me your work if you're comfortable, because it makes me happy to see!) All I request is to stay respectful to their pronouns and skin colors, ya knooow… 👍 note: The pokemon on their cards are all companions, not the ones they use on the Battle Subway. Except Jackie...the litwicks are just there to fill space/give them company.
More info under cut:
Edit: Important disclaimer:
These are again my designs/interpretations for the agents. Please don’t treat them as canon or as the only, quintessential designs for these literal background npcs. Many people have done takes on them before and after me, even back in 2010. It feels silly to ask, but due to past experience, I ask that you please DONT hunt down anyone that does a different take on the depot agents!! 👍
Tags:
I'm gonna start tagging them individually, but for now all Depot Agent comics and art on this blog are tagged under Depot Agents.
Height chart:
I’m not too strict about heights, so I don’t really care about actual measurements. Here’s an approximation of what I tend to visualize though:
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Sexualities/Gender Identities: I don't have official labels for each and every agent because I like keeping things fluid for characters to develop these traits on their own. However, as a queer person, I enjoy designing characters who are also queer, therefore I can safely say none of these characters are straight. The ones who are set in stone are Ramses (gay man), Cloud (lesbian woman,) Jackie (non-binary.) Furze uses he/they pronouns but their gender is undetermined. I also welcome anyone giving the agents a different gender identity to suit them (as long as it's done respectfully.)
Notes about each agent...
Cameron:
- Cameron dyes parts of his hair blonde and keeps other parts in black. This is because he is a big fan of Elesa and her fashion choices.  - Though there have been a few occasions to meet his idol, he is always way too nervous to approach her, feeling deep down that he'll mess up somehow. - He practices modeling poses in secret. He loves flourishes and flare, but is simply too insecure to put it on display. - Of his coworkers, he gets along the best with Furze. He's the easiest to talk to because Furze will do most of the talking. - Cameron is easily intimidated — even mean Pokémon can make him nervous. Though, his two worst fears are being left in a room alone with Jackie, and being left alone in a room with Isadore. - He takes advantage of his height to sometimes hide behind some of his coworkers. - Cameron is much better at Pokémon battles than he gives himself credit for. Emmet and Ingo were pleasantly surprised by this, since Cameron was promoted to fit a temporary role on the Battle Subway. They happily made him a permanent member when he proved himself capable. - His Dwebble (Pebby) is secretly very strong, and rushes to protect Cameron when it can. Cam sometimes thinks Pebby helps him feel more confident in himself too.  - If he stumbled into any of his coworkers outside of work, he would simply explode of embarrassment. - He is the youngest child and only son of his family. He lives in his own apartment in Nimbasa.
Cloud:
- Cloud (like Ramses) knew the twins when they were very young. - She used to be an ace trainer in her youth, even going so far to compete in the Pokémon league. Winning and becoming the champ was the most important part of her journey, but something happened along the way that changed that outlook. - It seems with age, her competitiveness has mellowed out. However, she maintains an intense energy when battling.  - Her favorite types are Psychic and Flying types. Swoobat (Sweetie) is her ace.  - Her favorite hobby is baking, and she often bakes sweets for the crew. She knows all their favorite flavors by now! - She prioritizes keeping a friendly relationship with all her coworkers and thinks of them fondly. She considers Ramses family after all the years of working together!  - She is a big fan of Brycen's movies and can recite the lines. - She lives with her wife in Anville. - Cloud loves doing maintenance work both at home and in Gear Station. She enjoys bringing her own tools and industrial flashlight.
Furze:
- Furze only has one volume setting (mid loud,) but he finds himself feeling right at home when talking to either one of the twins. - Furze has ADHD, and this is reflected in some of his habits, most visibly is his fidgeting when sitting still for too long. - He rides a bike to work every day. When he is late, Cloud clocks in for him so he doesn't get in trouble. - This is a kind of a guy that sits crouched gargoyle style on chairs. Only outside of work, of course. Bad posture could get him in trouble. - While working on the Battle Subway, there will be times Furze feels sorry for his opponents and offers to quietly let them pass anyways. This...has also gotten him in trouble. :[ - He went to the same elementary school as Isadore in Castelia. Though Isadore seems to have forgotten their short-lived acquaintance, Furze has not. This is part of the reason Furze claims they are in fact good friends!!! - Furze is the middle child of a big family. He lives with his mom and takes care of her, along with his many Darumakas and Darmanitan. All of his Pokemon have famous trains names. - He collects model trains. Naturally.
Isadore
- Isadore had plans to become the station master the moment he was hired as a depot agent, but alas... (sad trumpet sound.) - As a youth, he was more interested in science and engineering over Pokemon battles. He enjoys the strategizing aspect, at most. Not so much the competitiveness. - In addition, his Pokemon are all rescues and not used for battling. He's had his Watchog (Winston) since he was in his late teens. - His Electrode (Gregor) and Voltorb (Leonard) were rescued from the likes of Team Plasma. - Isadore admits he understands Pokemon better than humans. This has been apparent his whole life. - In spite of acting like a sitcom villain, Isadore cares about the management of Gear Station and the safety of the passengers to an incredible degree. He sees it as a personal life goal to assist in the management of Gear Station, as well as the success of the Battle Subway. - Though it pained him to become a subordinate to the twins, he begrudgingly accepts it for the greater good. - His almost militant efficiency certainly made up for his years of antagonizing the twins before they became the bosses. Ingo and Emmet understand this better than anyone. - Isadore keeps tabs on all of the staff members. So he very well knows all their birthdays and makes it a point to celebrate it. This is by no means a -happy- or -festive- event. It's just customary. - Like Furze, he was originally from Castelia, but now resides in Nimbasa. Isadore's only family is his mom and she lives in his childhood home with their Stoutland. - Isadore would have probably been voiced by every glasses guy ever J. Michael Tatum had he not already been cast as dear Emmet lmao
Jackie
- Jackie is a mystery and they like keeping it that way. When they talk, it's practically impossible to determine what is a lie or truth, especially if the subject is themselves or their background. - They love scaring Cameron the most and will ask to be paired with him whenever possible. They claim Cameron is their "favorite coworker," while Isadore is the least favorite. - It's plain to see why -- Jackie is the only one that doesn't passively tolerate Isadore's tirades. - Though my comics sometimes may allude to Jackie being a ghost/supernatural, this is not confirmed nor canon. I just personally enjoy toying with the concept. : ) That being said...
- Item #: SCP 7453
- Object Class: Euclid
- Special Containment Procedures: The ████ ██████ is ██████ within ████-██████. - Ingo and Emmet choose to not question anything about Jackie, since it's clear they're one of the more efficient workers. However it can be a safety concern... - Cloud and Ramses have worked with Jackie for a long time, though they've forgotten somehow. They believe Jackie is a new hire since they appear to be young. - Anyone trying to make sense of Jackie's employee records simply can't bring themselves to any conclusions. It's better to ignore the inconsistencies. - Jackie has never been seen to leave Gear Station. Jackie has never been seen in anything but their uniform. Jackie has never been confirmed to eat, drink or blink. Jackie knows your secrets. Jackie thinks it's... amusing.
Ramses
- Ramses sometimes misses having a full head of hair, but he thinks his signs of age make him look distinguished. (he is correct.) - Ramses is sort of the "mom friend," making sure everyone's concerns are heard, as well as trying to keep the peace whenever a conflict might arise. - If another coworker is feeling low, Ramses will try to cheer them up with a lighthearted joke or offer advice if they'd like it. - When the twins were promoted to bosses of the Battle Subway, Ramses cried because he felt so proud. - In most circumstances, he is a very simple and logical man. He is quick to find solutions and tries not to fret over the little stuff. It's not good for his heart after all. - His ace is his Pikachu (Musa,) though the mouse is more of a lap pet now. At home, he also has an Audino (Sara) and a Manectric (Nubi) who keep Ramses' husband company. His Klinklang (Moli) is the only one of his personal pokemon that accompany him to work nowadays. - Ramses considers Cloud family. They are best friends and love having family gatherings outside of work. They also gossip a lot, and don't mind when Jackie decides to join. - Ramses jokes about looking forward to retirement, but really doesn't want to leave until he is physically incapable of working anymore. Gear Station is like a second home to him.
In-Game Quotes
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The most important reference of all are their in-game quotes, of course, so I'm adding it to the post. A lot of their personality traits can be extracted and interpreted from these few lines. And I personally love that about Pokemon NPCs -- there's a lot of room to explore and play with. Some appear very obvious. Cameron practically announces that he isn't ready for the battle that's about to ensue and seems genuinely surprised to win. Furze comes out the gate talking about the subject they actually care about, which is their job and their love for trains. The two of them are very easy to understand. Now, Ramses lines allude to a gentle and simple personality. He views himself with humility, and maybe even with a bit of humor comparing himself to a train and to his opponent to a station. If he loses he shows no signs of disappointment, he just accepts defeat with one last honest quip. It s also amusing to see the Depot Agents all use train metaphors to describe themselves since it falls in line with how Ingo and Emmet talk.
In comparison, Cloud does the same thing calling herself the terminal instead. Immediately, she is way more daring, though still keeping a sense of professionalism. To me, it's obvious she is competitive as she even admits she was expecting to win ("Ah...I didn't see it coming.") Jackie's lines are fun since it's up to interpretation if they are being literal or lying. It's almost like they are more interested in confusing/creeping out their opponent than actually beating them. To me, it gives off a mischievous vibe. Isadore's opener "There are only two roads in life." is a curious one because it almost feels like he is trying to be philosophical. Definitely a guy who views himself as an intellectual, regardless if that’s true or not. I like to think it's a saying he really believes in, and it applies to his life. The road he likes (long route) vs the road he hates (shortcut) -- fighting tooth and nail to become boss vs biting his tongue and accepting Ingo and Emmet as the Subway Masters.
Those are just my thoughts on how I write these characters. Please have fun playing with these lines too!
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acidsaladd · 2 months
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incoming rant abt a possible ninjago atla au u have been warned
the gist of the au and what i have in me head is that lloyd is the next air avatar but for some reason the air nomads are skeptical/afraid of baby lloyd so misako takes lloyd and skidadles far away from the temple. because of this, lloyd grows up as a regular kid with no air benders around to teach him air bending And no knowledge that hes the avatar (and therefore that he can bend the other elements)
fast forward to when hes like 9?? 10? wu finds him, surprise ur actually the avatar its training time something something big spiritual evil that might be related to garm something something then wu Leaves and so the training bit falls onto the ninja. which. none of them is an airbender mind u and lloyd Still doesnt know airbending. so they teach him the other elements and Hope that he somehow learns air by proxy
i have a very small and not rlly thought out idea for what an equivalent of the aging tea could be but this is basically it in terms of bg and going forward its just ur usual avatar and ninja shenanigans
ok. now. i have a couple ideas for why the air nomads could be wary of lloyd. one is that they know garmadon is his dad and garm has been cursed by a Particularly Evil spirit and so they think evil dad equals evil son and they dont rlly wanna deal with that so they r like we must get rid of the child he will reincarnate either way its no biggie which,,, uhh yea lets not
the other one is that the nomads have discovered that lloyd is going to be the first avatar that is a direct decendant of the first ever avatar (the fsm) and so they want to like?? harness his power or smth idk.
(the only problem with these ideas is that it kinda relies ok the air nomads having kind of violent and evil solutions to problems so i stil. dont rlly know 😭)
the point is!! one way or another, misako starts seriously fearing for lloyds life and the fact that he might not ever have a choice over it as his own so she takes the baby and Runs.
[abt the fsm, raine lowkey gave me this idea entirely so shoutout raine hello but i was thinking that theres two of them. like. u have the FSM, the first ever avatar, all plwerful godly being. and then u have the dad, the f in fsm stands for Father, this guy is just wu and garms dad. i dint have much else thought out for him just. yea]
now. if i want to talk abt the possible aging tea equivalent i need to talk abt garm. soo augh idk abt garm but i think rhe gist of it is that hes been possessed/corrupted by a spirit bc of a deal he made or for messing with a spirit when he was researching things. the point is hes known as this being that brings chaos and stuff but then wu and misako reveal to lloyd like, thats ur dad actually, and misakos being researching ways to bring him back and lloyd stumbles on this research and decides (not so smartly) that if one qants their dad back one must do it himself so. he manages to contact the original spirit that garm annoyed
so they talk and the spirits like "well i Would give him back but he kinda made me lose my time and energy on him for like,, 4/5 years so unless u figure out a way to give me rhat time back i aint giving him to u" and lloyd goes bet take does from me no biggie
so then lloyd makes this deal not rlly knowing what hes doing and he goes back to the real world and suddenly he has a brand new dad and also abt two whole heads more in height woops
(this all happens post training arc starting so lloyd already knows the ninja and has been living with them for a while)
OK NINJA TIME
so ive been Rlly debating whether i should do the Usual thing and just stick em in the element rhat they have in the show. OR (and this is the idea im leaning more towards) i go with vibes. obviously the vibes are still informed and consider their element in the show
ok first kai and nya. i want them both to be fire nation buut idk if i should make them both firebenders or make them have their usual elements. i do wanna let nya be a waterbender, However since they do live in the fire nation (most likely in a more rural town far from the mainland) nya would be a waterbender that uses mostly firebending styles and techniques. i just have always found this type of mix and match they do with aang and zuko specifically SOO COOL i love it so im gifting that to nya
cole is an earthbender obvi. i havent rlly thought much abt cole bc i immediately decided he would stay an earthbender and didnt question him further.
NOW HEAR ME OUT HERE. i kinda rlly want to make jay earth kingdom and leave him as a non bender. why??? bc the Vibes man. i want to rlly focus on his engineering and tinkery side. i think he would still be rlly involved with bending and stuff and he tries to find different uses to bending outside of fighting. maybe him and cole are childhood friends and jay is always bugging cole to try some of his projects with coles bending.
and finally zane!! hes water tribe but i struggled to settle him on either tribe. i think the northern tribe could fit him in the future but i do think he's originally from the south. i feel like the south gives him more potential to be the specific brand of Peculiar that zane was in the beginning of the sbow. and since this is situated pre war, the southern water tribe would be bigger and better off than how we see them in atla so it would be cool to explore that
so im picturing him as the weird son of the local medic and whatever else dr julien gets up to . so maybe dr julien is teaching zane stuff and he gets Rlly Rlly good so they send him to a bigger settlement with better teachers and eventually he decides to leave the south pole to continue learning and stuff.
i do have ideas abt how wu gathers them together but ive ranted way too much so i will make another post on that if i remember to
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roe-and-memory · 8 months
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do you have any headcanons for red (the firetruck)? I barely see anything about him and I love him, so I’m hoping you do— if nots that’s okay!
OF COURSE WE HAVE RED HEADCANONS! we love red in this household ‼️‼️
i dont have a cheeky intro to this one, but we dont have Many but i think the ones we do have are good! i hope theyre to your expectation
- FIRST hes definitely the tallest of the town. maybe 6’5? 6’6? but he’s as sweet as a butterfly. he’s blonde, tall, and pretty muscular
- his go to outfit is a blank t-shirt and his firefighter overalls, except he wears a belt and the actual overall straps just sort of hang down the sides of his legs? if that makes sense.
- his watering can for his flowers are hooked to earlier mentioned overalls, he barely goes anywhere without it unless obviously theres a fire
- he knows sign language! this is probably the most common one you will ever see for red but i think hes fairly good at it! i think MAYBE he teaches cal how to do it as well? (i’ll elaborate more if anyone ever asks me for cal headcanons. please ask me for cal headcanons.)
- red is probably one of the best builders in town. he took architecture at some point and helped sally rebuild the motel, along with building docs house and the clinic (and whatever other newer buildings there are. im sure he helped with some of the older ones as well but i think he was way younger then and much less involved in the town back then.)
- red is like a son to lizzie, theyre very much the dynamic of “talks a lot & listens”. shes a chatterbox, talks about whatever comes to mind, and you’d never know it but she knows sign language too. she just talks At red and hes like yeah ok cool! he sometimes responds with sign and she acknowledges it but doesnt reply — mostly because he’s just doing words of agreement (shes also the shortest in the town, which makes for a second funny dynamic including heights. shes probably 4’9? possibly shorter. shes old af)
- red has put out more “lightning and mater” caused fires than ACTUAL fires. they are two of the most flame prone people in the world. it doesnt help that they collectively play with lightnings lighter in the junkyard, immediately making the area 10x more prone to bursting into flames. mater accidentally caused a grease/oil fire once and told lightning to put it out with WATER. he was only alerted to its existence by the giant EXPLOSION in the night sky. safe to say lightning walked away with a couple burns.
- red gets special treatment from flo because she thinks he’s the sweetest thing in the world, plus he saved her life when a mouse had chewed a wire in the café and shorted out the stove, effectively lighting it on fire, so she “moms” him pretty well!
- i think hes a very cuddly person in general, like hes so huggable and warm 24/7 he just Radiates comforting energy. he could never do anything wrong in his life.
- contradicting my previous statement - he could ALSO fight better than most. he has the advantages of being big and buff, but he also has the power to absolutely rock someones shit if it came down to it. he will defend his family (the town) with everything he has. he will NOT tolerate someone making any of them uncomfortable.
I KNOW ITS NOT A LOT BUT ITS ALL THE ONES I CAN REMEMBER CURRENTLY 💔💔 i hope you like them though!!
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rt-lots · 7 months
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Joining in on the Ian and Rammy ask train… 🌂✏️ (and 🍎 specifically for Ian!)
TW for a fair bit of suicide talk!!!
umbrella - i assume this doesnt need an answer for both of them, bcuz they belong 2 the same story. i imagine ian and rammys story being a vidya game, and i guess itd b a psychological horror? which feels like, pretentious to say but the main scaries of the story are how much ians life sucks and he wants 2 die. so... i think itd count. thats all overarching stuff tho... most of ian n rammys time spent together is lightheared, i think. theyre two dudes hanging out and one of them is slowly coming to terms with the fact his suicidal thoughts won. whatever genre that is
pencil - WAHHH it depends a lot of the time... ian and rammy have definitely made a big resurgence in my brain recently (past month) bc im 18 and can post bout em, but also just cuz i love them sooo much and want to chew on them constantly. id say i write abt/draw them pretty frequently tho!! i doodle them on my school work and in notebooks a lot and they have some of the bigger galleries on my toyhouse lawl. i dont write much directly for their universe, but ive typed... many paragraphs to my friends just braindumping the shit i think about them. so, yeah, less often than id like, but theyre up there in my priorities of ocs :3
apple (for ian) - GRAHHHHHHHHHHH u dont know what demons uve unleashed w this. i already twed this post for suicide but im gonna move this part under the cut bc mentioning ians dad specifically ties a lot into the suicide aspect of the story
OKAY SO. ians family consists of his mom, sister, and him. his dad was in the picture when he was a little kid, like early elementary age, but ditched after some time. his relationship with both parents was relatively normal, they definitely couldve done a better job raising him, but they were never intentionally hurtful nor did they scar him at all. (well, correction, his MOM didnt scar him at all)
after ians dad left, though, his side of the family still kept in touch... they gave very flimsy reasonings for his fathers absence, why he couldnt make it to holidays, why he wasnt saying all these things directly, etc. it kept things strained and tense as the family knew things were being kept from them but never got to know why. the last interaction ian ever had w his dads side of the family was on his 18th birthday, where his uncle gifted him a silver handgun with his name carved into the handle. it was a hollow attempt to connect with ian, a display of violent masculinity that ian would later use to try and take his own life.
i dont have it fully figured out what this *means* for ians character, but its something i go insane about. ians only memories of his dad are him doing stereotypical masculine dad things w him, like fishing. maybe he didnt interact w ian ass if he was his child, but if he was his son, and that improper socialization is part of the reason he hates himself- why the gun is what kills him. but... i dunno really. ians social anxiety, addiction, and general collapsing in on himself are cuz of a life time of mental illness that went unchecked until he successfully isolated himself to the point no one *could* care, not just cuz daddy give him gun.
okay! that is NOT what u asked at all but now u know it. hehehe. of course ian and rammys story is a big wip forever so excuse me for any side tangents and/or general plot points w loose ends
but! as for his actual relationships w family (ill include sister since his relationship w mom isnt rlly fleshed out yet):
he and his mom havent spoken in 6 years, nor have he and his sister. he slowly faded out of their lives when he moved away, partly out of a subconscious desire to isolate and partly due to just not having the social confidence or energy to maintain regular communication w his family. his mom is the first person he talks to when he escapes his Puter, and she's his rock in his remaining months of recovery. shes very underdeveloped as a character atm, but what is certain is she tries her hardest to understand her sons struggles and support him, offering to pay for therapy for him. ian loves his mommy lalala
ian and his sister are... dddifferent. ian also had an average relationship w his sister, but shes a lot more upfront with him when it comes to talking about how his 6 year absence effected her than their mom. their mom, while wanting her children to seek help for their respective struggles, doesnt really want to actively talk about those things with them. shes terrified of saying the wrong thing, and it doesnt help that she doesnt even have a clue what *to* say. ians sister, though, isnt afraid to tell him "hey man we fucking missed you. your absence hurt a lot because i didnt have any friends either, and i wish we couldve had eachother. jackass" post main-story they are friendly and hang out. during his time w rammy, ian does talk about his thoughts on his sister before he left, that being that shes a "crazy bitch"... family <3
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toast-is-ticklish · 2 years
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Would really love some mor Lee! Red Son fixa, hopefully with Ler! Mei
Ask and you shall receive! I also put MK in here because I just love that funny little guy.
Sleepover
Lee! Red Son, Ler! Mei, and Ler! MK
Will I continue to project onto almost every single character I write about? Most definitely.
Basically red is feeling really nervous at a sleepover with their friends and they get reassured with tickles and kind words. Ft. A group hug.
___________________________________________
Red son blearily checked the time only to see a big, red, taunting 4:15 am on the clock next to his bed.
Shit.
After being invited to a sleepover with Mei and the Noodle Boy, they had accidentally stayed up almost all night frantically googling. What do people do at sleepovers? How should they act? He didnt want to be a poor guest! They had to make sure they didnt screw it up!
So after hours upon hours of useless wikihow articles and blog posts, they were left sitting in their bed, completely wired, probably not going to sleep a wink.
He figured he could just nap a bunch tommorow before he went over, but instead he ended up getting everything ready by 6am and anxiously pacing around the house until they had to be at MKs apartment which was 5:00pm.
Christ they were a mess.
So now here they were, anxiously sitting on MKs couch, running on a fuck ton of instant coffee and pure nervous energy. They literally looked like a wood board on the couch.
"Uuhhhhhh. Red Boy? You good?" Mei said as she laid down an armful of snacks onto the coffee table and sat down.
Red son snapped his head over so quickly it looked like it hurt. "Me? Of course I am, you bozo! I'm simply perturbed by how utterly depressing the Noodle Boys lair is." He talked a little faster than normal, his nerves shining through the flair.
"I keep telling you Red, it's an apartment. Not a lair." MK yelled from the kitchen, before walking into the living room with everybody's popcorn.
Upon seeing red son he squinted his eyes in suspicion. "Whyyyyyyyy do you look like you're being held at gunpoint to sit on my couch? And like you havent slept in 500 years?"
And now Red son was surrounded on all sides by their suspicious, concerned, and extremely nosy friends.
But that's okay, because they were a master of misdirection, even on zero hours of sleep.
"500 years?!" They screeched in mock anger, even letting their flame burst up a little for the dramatics, "I take offense to that."
"And I take offense to you obviously dodging my question."
Shit.
"I-I. I dont know what you mean." He mumbled, pointedly looking away.
He didnt want to tell those two how nervous he was. It was embarrassing.
"Fess up, Red Boy!" Mei exclaimed, "We're your friends! You can trust us yaknow?" She started poking his side, mainly as an attempt to annoy him onto confessing whatever it was that he was so keen on hiding.
She was very pleasantly suprised to be met with a squeak.
"MK?" She said, oozing with mischief, "I think I just found a great way to get our friend to open up a little."
Red Son wishes they could say they put up a good fight, but their total lack experience with tickling combined with their lack of sleep ended up with them just sort of flailing around uselessly before being immediately pinned.
"Prepare for your doom, Red Son!" MK announced in a goofy 'evil' voice, before both of Reds friends erupted in the cheesiest evil laughs he had ever heard.
"You two are really bad at that, you know?" He said, nervous grin wobbling on his lips.
"Nuh Uh! Bullying later, laughing now!" Mei said, before diving into Red Sons ribs, digging her fingers in and scribbling all over.
"Ah! Nohohhahah! Ihihihis thihihihis- Ahahah! Nehehecesaahahahy?!"
Red son squeaked before bursting into high pitched, childish laughter, which really made him want to cover his face right about now. He squirmed around weakly, just sort of grabbing Meis hands as if that would in any way stem the somersaults his stomach was doing.
"Seems pretty necessary to me!" MK said, and even though Red couldnt see his face, they could hear the stupid smirk in his voice.
MK suddenly joined the fray, but not at all in the way Red Son expected.
He expected MK to be very rough and boisterous, so he didnt expect the boy to go for his neck and ears, and especially did not expect for him to be so incredibly gentle.
Then he immediately realized why.
The contrast of sensation was driving him insane!
Scrunching his shoulders up as he shook his head back in forth, Red son realized just how screwed they were. The tickles on his ribs from Mei made his back arch into her hands, making it tickle worse. Meanwhile MK was not only making them look like a dork but also increasing the butterflies in their stomach making their anticipation go up, making everything more ticklish.
Maybe they were evil.
"Red boy your tickle laugh is so cute!!" Mei squealed as she scribbled down to his sides.
Red Son had never actually been called cute by anybody, except for when he was being condescended to. So when Mei called him that, he essentially felt like his brain exploded.
They could feel themselves blushing as those goddamn butterflies in their stomach went fucking crazy again. The word echoed in their mind over and over again, 'cute' ,and every time it did it was more flustering.
So why did it also feel kind of warm and fuzzy?
Mei seemed to have noticed his internal dilemma and looked a little too excited about it. "MK!! I think Red Boy likes being called cute!!"
What.
"Nononono! NohohoOHOT truhUHAHahah!" He squealed, nope, nuh uh, no way, that's too embarrassing to be happening right now.
Mk leaned over to take one look at Red Sons face and apparently something was telling because he immediately broke into a playful grin.
"They do!"
"Ihihi DOHohonT! Ahahnd ihiHIHIm NOhohOHT!!"
Red son definitely did not whine through laughter.
"Your denial is also adorable, Red boy."
Mei giggled to herself before shoving her hands into his underarms, making the fiery teen squeal before breaking into slightly hysterical sounding cackles.
There were many words to describe Red Son, most of them not very nice, and adorable was definitely not one of them. That's what he would've said if he could, but what came out of his tickle fried brain was less eloquent.
"NohHOhoho! NHOHOT AhahdROAHAHABLE! NohoHOH! HEHAHAHAH!"
Red Son laughed loud and uncontrolled as once again that stupid word ran circles around their mind. They were too tired for this...confusion.
Still they felt that stomach flipping sensation again, and the warm fuzziness, and could not convince themselves it was entirely unpleasant.
Although supremely embarrassing.
"Hey Mei! You stay up here, I wanna try something!" MK said before quickly scurrying down to Red Sons legs. What the hell was he up to now?
Red was having trouble focusing on his suspicion what with the chest shaking laughs and ticklish shocks racking his frame though.
When MK skittered his fingers behind Reds knees, they wanted to encase themselves in concrete and wait a million years until they came out and proceeded to live the life of a hermit for the rest of eternity.
Their laughter immediately became a lot more bubbly, as they kicked their legs out weakly and snorted with a squeak.
"O.M.G!! Was that a snort I just heard? That's just too cute! You're gonna kill me, Red!" MK cooed while scrambling to not fall off of Reds kicking legs.
"SToHop cAHAHLLIHNG MeheHeheHe Thahat youHOUHOU *snort* WeiRHEIRDOHOHOS!"
Why must these two always throw him into weird internal crisis?
The fact that they had snorted and were being cooed at was not helping their current state of looking like a tomato on fire. They squeezed their eyes shut, mainly just to avoid eye contact at this point.
The butterflies in his stomach seemed to love it though.
'Awwww' was all the warning he got from Mei before she switched over to skittering all over his stomach, making his laughter switch from hysterical to completely childish.
Full, bubbly, laughs took hold of him as he squirmed desperately, scrambling for anything to grab before settling on weakly tugging at Meis wrists.
"Hahahehehahah! WHhyhyyhy ihihis tHIhihis hahaPahahnihing tohoho meheeh!?!"
"I actually forgot." MK said said with a chuckle, still evilly attacking Reds knees.
"Uuhhhhhhhhhh." Mei looked blankly over Red Sons head before jerking back to reality, "Oh! Right, tell us what's bothering you or we will tickle you... FOREVER!" She announced, following up with another goofy evil laugh.
"Youhouhou cahahant mahhake mehe!!" Red laughed out and immediately knew that was the wrong choice of words.
"You suuuuure bout that?" Mei said before drilling into Red Sons hips like the evil psychopath she is.
Red shrieked and burst into loud pitchy laughter.
At the same time, MK started squeezing at the tops of his knees, sending ticklish shocks everywhere.
The only thought that Red Son could produce at this point was 'tickles'. Head thrown back, starting to go limp with chest shaking laughter, they were officially gone.
"You good there, Red Boy?"
"AHAHEHEHAHAH! HAHEHAHAH!"
"Sounds great!" 
Suddenly Mei found a spot on Reds hips that them screech before breaking into completely silent laughter.
"ILLTELLOHMYGODSTOP" Red son somehow wheezed out, and immediately his friends withdrew their hands and gave him some space to breathe.
After a few moments passed of Red son catching their breath, they were the first to break the silence.
"I have never seen such pure evil as what you just subjected me to."
Both MK and Mei broke out into giggles.
"Yehehea yehea, sure. Now tell us what was bothering you or you might see some more 'pure evil'." MK said with a smirk.
"Uuugggghhhhhh. Do I have to?"
"Yep! I'm invoking bestie priviledges!" Mei said, ignoring a certain MK who was wiggling his fingers while dramatically whispering 'eviiiiiiiiil'.
"Fine. I was just nervous. I guess."
"Why?" MK and Mei asked, tilting their heads a little in confusion.
"Well. I've never really had friends before. And I've never been to a sleepover before, and I was just worried that I would just, kinda, ruin everything?" Red said, looking away and fidgeting with their hands.
"I'm not fun and outgoing like you two, I dont know how to be! And I kept reading all these articles that were like, 'Just relax! Be yourself! Blah blah blah!'  But I'm pretty sure whoever wrote them didnt expect the sleepover hosts to be past mortal enemies you helped your dad try to murder! What if I accidentally light your duvet on fire?! What if-"
"Woah, woah, woah! Take a breath Red, everything's okay! First of all, you're not going to ruin anything. Literally you just being here is enough to make the sleepover better, because you're our friend and we love you and love being around you." Mk reassured, a look of concern on his face.
"Yeah, Red Boy! And no matter how cheesy those articles you read sound, they're right! You dont need to act like anybody else around us. You dont need to pretend to be whatever you think is 'fun and outgoing'. We just want you!" Mei chipped in.
Red son seemed to take a second to process everything he was just told, before a small smile overtook his face. He looked up eyes a little glassy and just said "Thank you guys.", voice uncertain and a lot softer than usual.
"We got you, Red."
Ams suddenly he was in a group hug. It was warm. And nice.
"And what do we say about the stuff with DBK?" Mei said, raising her eyebrows a little.
"Its water under the bridge." Red son said in a monotone voice, pretending to be annoyed.
"Exactly! Now who wants to eat some popcorn that's definitely cold by now and watch the entire Monkey Cop movie series?!"
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gaypleasantview · 2 years
Note
dirk (and dustin if u want) for the ask meme? :3
hell yeah!!
Dirk:
Sexuality Headcanon: gay, i enjoy other headcanons for him too but the version of Dirk that lives in my head is definitely homosexual/homoromantic, just feels so right to me. im thinking of putting him on the asexual spectrum somewhere (where is my drink) probably demisexual. his type is probably straight up someone like Dustin if we're being honest here
Gender Headcanon: trans guy! came out as a kid long before Darleen passed away and got lots of support from his parents about both his sexuality and gender <3 i don't know if he realized both around the same time but he knew himself pretty well pretty early on, good for him
A ship I have with said character: ever since i realized the possibility of Dustin/Dirk it has changed my life lol. like it was really always there and it's such an obvious set up but it went completely over my head like it did for most of us i guess, the way maxis seemingly intended is good too because Lilith/Dirk feels like a very exciting couple to play with if you see Dirk being attracted to girls/whatever gender you hc Lilith as. D&D live in my mind rent free tho. it's an easy enemies to lovers for me and some would argue that trope is overdone but there is not nearly enough content about these two that fit the trope perfectly sooo i wanna make that content. speaking of Dirk in this relationship, at first he admits Dustin is cute but hates the dude's attitude so he's gonna be in denial about his Dustin situation for the longest time. he's probably gonna be the one to make this actual relationship happen even though he's gonna be scared. but when Dustin opens up Dirk starts feeling really comfortable with him and falls in love deeply
A BROTP I have with said character: easily him and Lilith, in my hc she's a lesbian and they are fake dating while actually being besties so they don't even have to pretend much. these two are an opposites attract situation too but their energies match so well?? i should probably make them other friends though because no one has more than 2 friends in my stories 😭 i mean Dirk's also good friends with his dad but. yeah
A NOTP I have with said character: this must be about romance but i don't have much to say so i'll talk about enemies instead in this question. well i dont believe he has enemies aside from Dustin and that one's not exactly fitting for this question as we already know so probably no one lol. Dirk doesn't like Angela too and i never realized until just now btw that his relationship with her after he gets with Dustin is gonna be REALLY AWKWARD
A random headcanon: he's a giant bookworm, tries to be the best at everything and is quite grumpy, i feel like he would be very successful in college because he's just a shining star however you look at him. absolute delight (but can be a bitch). he loves cats and the color purple (i actually thought of making it his signature color but he's already assigned blue by maxis so im confused). also a big taylor swift fan
General Opinion over said character: gives off rainy vibes but is actually such a sunshine. i love him so much and im so glad i discovered how great of a character he is a few years ago, he's a certified son of mine (it's actually crazy to think that if he's a teen he's younger than me... like that is a noticeable age gap. huh)
Dustin:
Sexuality Headcanon: i would say the definition that feels right to me is homosexual/biromantic, sometimes i think it could be one or the other but i always remember that it doesn't have to because sexuality is a wide spectrum and im very happy to represent someone who has different romantic and sexual attraction! his gayness is powerful and i also cherish the girl-liking side of him and i think it's beautiful. i don't know if he's allosexual yet but i feel like he's probably demiromantic i hadn't even realized that until just now! im excited
Gender Headcanon: im still wondering about this, i see him as a guy and currently as cis, i really like the idea of him being trans but given how i hc him and his family i feel like by the age of 16 he would be unlikely to freely express himself or maybe even discover himself at all? he's quite emotionally repressed and doesn't give himself time to process his feelings so he probably wouldn't even know what the feeling means if he had it. hmmm
A ship I have with said character: Dirk ofc. Dustin didn't know he was gay and likely had inner homophobia but after meeting Dirk he knew what was up and he embraced it (after they stopped hating each other first heh). he had a pretty wonderful relationship with Angela so i like these two a lot together but with Dirk it's just a whole another story. Angela is like a comfort place and with Dirk it's like a rollercoaster and Dustin is just addicted to the feeling. he will be the first one to make a move but it's gonna be in a bit of a stupid way of course because he's secretly really awkward so it'll take time for them to actually see what's up
A BROTP I have with said character: Angela. she helps him with the kids and just generally spends so much time with him and they genuinely love each other so much as bf and gf but then as friends too, the breakup is hard for Angela but after some time it definitely gets better and they are just a great couple of peeps who care for each other :) i would say i need to get Dusty other friends too but i'll be honest with you i don't even think he has any. poor boy i gave him like 2 or 3 nice points
A NOTP I have with said character: Lilith hates Dustin and wouldn't engage 😭 she learns to tolerate him but imagine these two put in a room they would fight to death
A random headcanon: Dustin is a huge family boy and the only times he is genuinely expressing his feelings is when he is with his little siblings. Brandi and him have a weird relationship that is full of fights but in its core their relationship is not the worst, she's a loving mom just not very good at it. he probably has some obscure hobbies but i don't remember which rn. he likes sports (sadly). he's a very angsty teen and 100% listens to angsty teenage music in his room. he's gonna be such a great man in college when he matures and starts being honest with himself about things and this is the best glow up ever
General Opinion over said character: i love Dustin. i am so proud of his growth and bravery <3 he is kind of a menace in the beginning of my story, super mean but i don't want to throw him under the bus because his soul is so beautiful. wait is that bus thing even a saying or did i make that up. anyways boy needs therapy and hugs
thank you so much for the ask!!! this is really long but i love talking about them <3
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frostbite-the-bat · 6 months
Text
OK random FROSTBITE THE BAT (CHARACTER) TOONTOWN RAMBLES
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thinking abt frost and their development with them hiding their identity as a cog - it's always been basically a big joke, after all this lore and 'au' with them isn't very serious and is very jokes (though some of the more personal or detailed things mean a lot to me, especially the allan/cathal/frost/spam/hr/freakson goofy family dynamic)
but I just think it's so funny how they went from careless but still careful to realizing nobody cares as a case of convenient plot armor. like oh no wait we can't do that the toons will know we're cogs. We (spam + frost) gotta be careful though the cogs don't know we're toons. we're in this middle ground where we're FUCKED OVER
but they find toons and cogs they love who love them back and frost just had their whole careless development and they just. Don't care now like all the oil stains and only ever talking to cogs that they were worried about in the past it seems to be a joke to them too. as long as like the resistance doesn't know, they're fine
And if they were to be sorta harassed away from presenting as toons and being around toons they have a massive safety net with the cogs. canonically this would never make sense but it's a self insert au for myself and my friend group, so like whatever we want to happen can happen it's goofy it's cheesy it's nice it's very seperate from canon but it's FUN like I'm aware and like. they barely do shit thats like bad bad theyre just silly goofy frost max bites you then does a prank they dont do evile. they dont even got normal job)
Plus frost especially doesn't have to worry about cogs seeing them as a toon and getting attacked either this fucking thing is a menace with maybe a slightly oversized ego even if they get fucked up in a battle they're probably gonna pretend it didn't happen (while everyone else laughs) boy they scare any flunky with those teeth
like it's very unrealistic but it's so goofy and fun just watching this just. goofy loud motherfucker do whatever they want and do pranks and be a menace. it's fun to just have a character to mess with around non seriously but goooood the more private dynamic stuff is so good I mention it in doodles
them mirroring allan with showing off son everywhere and being very proud of him. their dynamic with spam of kinda being the lead sibling getting into trouble and being loud with empty threats with spam just being like 'uh huh yeah' about it because frost wouldn't do it. frost is a very fail character but in a swag way. their whole 'this weird fucking thing that perplexes me I need to know more about them now we got something fruity going on that isn't ever disclosed because it's entertaining on stage but also frost never says shit' with hr (they're the Fucking Thing), them being able to keep cathal company in some times lifting his mood and motivation up whenever he's too dismotivated or. like just depressed for stuff. more reason to do things when you got goofy siblings to do things with. Especially frost being the opposite energy like they have energy levels equal to graham like those two constantly babble!!
Another dynamic!! The rivalry with Graham but like. there's still some slight care bc mole pace flint is canon here. That's their boss and the guy dating their clubs leader and one of their closest friends also like. but also they will be tryna fight each other in small goofy ways and try to one up each other like 💀💀💀 the girls r fighting. OK see u next week same time for me beat you up!!!!!
It's all so goofy but I LOVE IT I LOVE MY SILLY GUYS I LOAVE TOONTOWM EVEN IF ITS MY OWN PERCIEVED SELF INSERT VERSION OF MYSELF. MY TOONTOWN FRIENDS AND REAL FRIENDS ARE ALL IN IT!! WE'RE ALL HERE!! AND MY GOOFY BAT IS IN THE CENTER OF IT ALL!!
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dr4cking · 3 years
Text
His Mother’s Garden.
masterlist taglist
draco malfoy x reader | smut | enemies to lovers
a/n : this is so random bye :”
"y/n, come down here for a minute, darling. i have something to tell you" y/n sighed slowly getting up from her lovely bed as she heard her mom called her to come downstairs.
"yes, mother?" her mom greeted y/n with a big smile while her father sitting on the couch, y/n feels like she was going to be interrogated, she grabbed a bottle of water and drink.
"sweetie go pack your stuff and dress nicely, we're going to stay at Malfoy Manor for 3 days." she felt as if her breath got taken away somewhere when she choked on the water, her mother worriedly run to her and smack her back.
"pardon me, mother. but i think i've misheard about what you just said" y/n's mother just chuckled at her daughter's reaction.
"no darling, you heard it right, we're going to stay at their place"
"but why so sudden, mother? you know i hate their son" y/n whines loudly thinking about how awkward it is to spend the day with the malfoys.
"well i met narcissa earlier in gringgots, its been so so long, you know we're very close when we were young, and your dad here is working at the ministry with lucius malfoy too, darling. so we really have to catch up" her mother explained it with her bubbly energy, she did tell y/n how she and narcissa were basically best friends in their time.
"but why do we have to literally stay there? we could've just hung out there and then go back home" y/n frowns, taking a seat beside her father.
"of course not, narcissa is the one who suggested the idea and it would be rude of me to reject it, now dont be a baby and do as i say its only for three days, honey. this is the end of the discussion or we're gonna be late" her mother cupped her cheeks smiling so wide and give her a little kiss on her right cheek before taking her hand and shoved her to go back to her room.
she goes to her room, started to packing while blabbering about her mother, she picked a pleated skirt and putting on a knit sweater, she put on a light makeup and grabbed her sneakers, she doesnt want to dress up so much because she didnt want to go in the first place.
she takes her bag with her going downstairs seeing her parents already waiting at the front door, she huffed.
——————————————
"ah, finally the (your surname)'s here! y/m/n, who is this lovely lady, is this y/n? oh my god, you've grown up" narcissa said as she hugs y/n after she hugged her mother greeting her family, y/n smiles and nod turning the gesture politely.
"lucius, draco! hurry, come here."
both of the platinum blonde-haired men appeared at the door, lucius greet y/n's father, giving y/n a small nod, but draco stayed behind his parents, just looking up and down at y/n smirking making her rolled her eyes at him.
the malfoys lead her family in, showing their room for their stay, the house elves taking their things. as y/n wanted to follow her parents, a hand grabbed her wrist stopping her steps.
she looks up only to meet the boy she loathed so much in their school. draco lucius malfoy.
"not so fast y/l/n" draco pulled her closer, a smirk still plastered on his lips.
"get your filthy hand off of me, ferret. i’m not in the mood." y/n snickered yanking her hand back.
"ooo, feisty. listen y/n, i just want to make a peace for awhile. at least can we try to be civil? i dont want to ruin our parent's moment, and besides that, you're staying in my house, i dont want it to be awkward." draco rubbed the back of his neck staring at her.
"ugh fine, whatever draco" y/n turns and run to follow her parents not wanting to talk to draco for any longer, leaving draco behind who just rolled his eyes at her behavior.
the day goes on so fast, their parents talked and chatted all day, leaving draco and y/n no choice but just to listened and joined their conversation, they both wonder if their parents ever get tired, as the night finally came, everyone already going to their rooms.
y/n wake up from her sleep groaning, she took a look at the clock, it was 2 am.
she rubbed her eyes, her throat feels so dry, she decided to go downstairs to grab a drink before going back to sleep.
"what are you doing at this hour, y/n?" y/n turns around from the refrigerator finding draco who stood behind her with his grey sweatpants. merlin's beard, he looks hot.
"cant you see im drinking, idiot"
y/n close the refrigerator and started to walk back to her room wanting to avoid draco as fast as she can but she only made three steps before draco pushed her against the refrigerator trapping her making y/n let out a squeal.
"you’ve got a big mouth, dont you sweet thing?" draco smirk seeing her flushed face, he pressed his body closer to her making her cheeks heated.
"d-draco i-"
"sshh, cat got your tongue now, hm?" draco rubbed his thumb on her bottom lip, tugging at it making y/n shivered at his touch.
"oh i see you like this, yeah?" draco leans into the crook of her neck, his hot breaths against her neck got y/n to rub her thighs together and draco placed his knee between them keeping her thighs apart.
he starts to pressed kisses along her neck causing her breath hitched, her panties are dampen when she takes a look at his lower part and his hard on brushed against her heat, she let out a soft moan and quickly pushed draco away from her.
"i- i should go" y/n runs to her room, cursing herself, draco behind her just chuckled deeply, satisfied at her reaction, but now he got some problem to take care of.
the next day came, y/n didnt get so much sleep after her last interaction with draco, just thinking about it makes a blush appeared on her cheeks, she threw away the thought of touching herself last night.
she quickly made her way to the bathroom and took a shower.
she just finished showering, putting on a bathrobe and letting off the towel on her head, but as she looked at the mirror, she screamed.
why is her hair green?!
only one name crossed her mind, she runs downstairs to get her target with anger bubbling up inside her.
"draco lucius malfoy! you better come back here! turn my fucking hair back to its color!" y/n yelled, running as fast as she can, catching draco who already ran away from her, without stopping his laughter.
"dont worry y/n, you look good with g-green" draco was panting heavily still laughing, he was still running but stopped at his mother's garden hiding behind it, hoping that y/n didnt catch him here. a smile never leaving his face.
but before draco could react more, he got tackled to the ground, y/n was hovering above him, her wand on his throat, threatening him.
she keeps talking but all he could think about was how hot y/n look on top of him, her new hair color still wet enough to drip the water down to his face, her top of the robe is low enough to show him her cleavage.
he quickly made his eyes back up to her, he would lie if he said this didnt turn him on.
"draco did you hear what i said? turn my hair color back!" y/n pushed his chest back down but her face redden as she realizes what was she doing right now, she quickly gets off of draco but only to be flipped over by him.
y/n was about to say something but got cut off by draco silencing her mouth with a kiss, he kissed her harshly, y/n was still in shock but not for long she melted into the kiss, she wrapped her arms around his neck deepening the kiss, they're practically swallowing each other faces, tongues fighting over the dominance, moans coming off from their lips without breaking the kiss.
memories of last night coming back to their minds.
"fuck- you're so fucking hot. do you want this y/n?" draco said as he pulled away, breathing heavily.
"yes, yes please, draco" with that, draco attached his lips to her neck, sucking and biting making a mark of his.
y/n rolled her hips on his crotch grinding against him making him let out a soft grunt, he pulls away to admire his work and he goes to untie her robe but not before he asked her permission, she nodded vigorously.
draco untied her robe making her body fully exposed in front of him, he moaned softly at the view and his lips instantly latching onto her nipple sucking and pulling it between his teeth softly making the girl squirmed. his other hand grabbed her breast squeezing it, he was amazed at how her breast fit perfectly in his hand.
y/n tugged at his shirt signaling she wants it off, draco gets the hint and takes it off, she pulled his sweatpants down making his hard cock slapped up to his stomach. she whimpered at his size wondering if it gonna fits in her.
draco groaned at the feeling of her hand pumping his cock up and down, her thumb playing at his red swollen tip, precum already oozing out of it. he stopped her hand before he cums right there.
he spreads her legs wider making the perfect view of her glistening cunt in front of him, he licks his lip, started to kiss her thighs before going to her core making her body jolted out.
"draco.. please, do something" draco smirk, he loves how he gets y/n to beg him, she sounds so hot, begging suited her.
he licked up her slit before sucking on her clit, he moaned at her taste, sending vibrations to her body, y/n gripped his hair tightly moaning his name over and over again as draco's tongue thrusting in and out of her hole.
he then inserts two fingers in her and pumping them inside of her fast, curling them inside, his tongue still licking her cunt lapping up her juices, y/n already a moaning mess.
"yes! draco right there! right fucking there.. oh god im gonna-"
of course.
of course he pulled out, right before y/n could ever reach her high leaving her whining and glared at him in anger, draco chuckles looking at her face.
"stop being so fucking greedy, y/n. you only allowed to cum when my cock is buried deep inside you" draco pumps his cock tapping it against her cunt, lining his tip up and down at her clit, y/n gets impatient but draco pushed her hips down to stop her from moving.
he slowly pushed in his entire length inside her, both of them cant help but moaning each other’s name out loud, inch by inch filling her inside. draco stopped to let her adjust as he fully inside her. he wants her to feel every part of him. y/n wrapped her legs around his waist, nodding at him to move.
"god- you're so tight y/n, i cant barely move. do you know how long i've been wanting to have you under me" draco's breath tickling her neck as he buried his face on her neck, slowly picking up his pace as he thrusts in and out of her.
"yes- fuck.. harder draco i want it rough and fast, please" draco was shocked at how y/n think her tight little pussy could take him rough and fast, but he obeyed anyway.
he grabbed her legs, putting them on his shoulder and begin to thrusting harder, rough and fast like she wanted making her cried out at the angle.
"fuck! you're such a slut y/n, letting me fuck you senseless in my mother's garden, dont you scared at the thought of getting caught, hm? oh i bet you would love that, right?" y/n only could mutter a low 'yes' as draco keep pounding at inhumanly pace making her whole body shake.
"what is it? i cannot hear you, my little slut" draco gripped her throat with his hand, pressing their foreheads together as he stared deeply into her soul not even stopping his thrusts.
"y- yes draco im your slut, i'd love tha- g- god please.."
"stop stuttering." draco's hand move down to twirling her nipples in his fingers and pinch them lightly making her yelp.
"draco?"
draco and y/n stopped their activities for a minute, staring at each other in horror, draco smirk down at her while she stared at him in confusion.
he starts to move again, snapping his hips harder, making y/n gasped, he quickly put his hand over her mouth. draco was thankful that the bushes hiding their ungodly activities perfectly.
"yes, mother?" draco said casually as if nothing was happening right now, he quickens his thrust, going deeper and harder into her while a tear rolled down on y/n's face at the feeling of the knot in her stomach tighten and she had to hold her moans.
"what are you doing there, draco?" narcissa asked as she cant found her son anywhere, only hearing his voice.
"im doing some school stuff mother, i'll be quick and head inside" draco answers holding his moans between his words feeling he would cum any sooner, he hoped his mother take the hint and leave already.
like draco expected, narcissa gives him an 'okay' before going back inside the manor but not without the hesitation in her voice but she left anyway.
"fuck.. you almost got us caught y/n" draco chuckles as his hand left her mouth, a loud moan suddenly escaped her lips.
"you're insane draco, why didnt you s- stop- oh my god.. gonna cum"
y/n cried out she cant even finishing her sentence as draco brings his hand down on her clit, rubbing in circles, getting her closer to her high, his other hand going back to choking her, he leaned in to capture her lips to hold his own high, he wanted her to cum first.
and within seconds, y/n came undone, it hit her hard causing her legs to shake, her eyes screwed shut seeing the stars all she could remember was his name when she moaned it out loud.
draco look down at his cock covered with her juices milking him, he moaned loudly and with the last thrust he collapsed on her, spurting out all of his warm thick cum inside her, painting her walls white making the girl moaned too feeling so full.
he moaned her name into her ear sending butterflies to her stomach as he rides out their orgasms. draco pulled out slowly making y/n winced, their mixed liquids dripping down to their inner thighs.
"merlin. that was so fucking hot, y/n" draco said reconnecting their lips, kissing her with passion and emotion this time.
"that was more than being civil, draco" y/n laughs making draco join her laughter too. he starts to dressed himself back up.
"there i thought we were enemies" draco said as he cleaned her up and tying her bathrobe back.
"oh we are, i still hate you" y/n poked his cheek making draco laughed.
"didnt seem like it 5 minutes ago" draco said as he captures her lips on his again as he finished cleaning her.
"round 2 in my room tonight?" draco asks as he pulled away. y/n smirked at him.
"only if you turn my hair color back" and he pulls out his wand from his pocket and swished it turning her hair back to its natural color.
both of them heading back to the manor, feeling excited and new. they stopped at their parents already waiting for them to show up in the living room with a mix expressions worn on their faces making draco and y/n blushed madly.
"im glad we decided to stay." y/n's mother breaking the silence making the room filled with laughter.
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
tagging : @dracoscum :( @hellounicorn @onyourgoddamnleft @whoreforgeorgeandfred @turn-to-page-394-please @youreso-golden @dracmalf0y-dm @f4iryluvy @arzfia @slut4dracoo @alexthealexthealex
976 notes · View notes
theshy1sout · 3 years
Text
Six Eared Shadow
Do you remember the analysis about Mei and Red Son? That was me, and I'm doing this again, but now about Macaque and Sun Wukong
Because what the heck why do they hate each other so much
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Ok, so this... This is such a messy chaotic really chaotic mix of a few headcanons and theories I made up and it SOMEHOW turned into a fanfic that I wrote so long that other people made many similar things in meanwhile and now this sounds not original at all, but I wrote it not to keep it in my deep hidden shelf so here we go
(It's based on what I know from the lmk series. I've started to read JTTW, but I'm still not so far to get to know anything about Macaque, but I won't change anything about this theory from now on)
Let's gather some basic information for the start.
-> Macaque is made with a shadow or even he is a shadow (kinda shadow demon, the demon of shadow). I mean, shadow is not only his power, he literally is made with shadow matter. We know that because he can not only manipulate shadows but also go through walls and turn yourself into a shadow.
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-> I'm not sure if someone made him or he just "poof" out of nowhere just like Sun Wukong, but according to the story he told about how close he and Monkey King used to be, there's no doubt they had some master/student relationship which later turned into almost equal partnership. What is said, Macaque followed Sun Wukong for a long time, learning a lot from him, 'being his shadow'. They grew in power together, fought together, and (as it is said) Macaque started casting as Sun Wukong shadow, which (surprisingly) looks like he did willingly. Just look at the picture - the shadow is big and bright, it’s powerful and smiling, proud of his strength. He doesn’t look like someone forced to be Sun Wukong’s shadow. It shows how much Macaque admired Monkey King, that he wasn't just a friend for him, he was his idol.
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-> We all know Macaque is a shadow demon, he can easily change his appearance, he does not have to look like an evil clone of Monkey King, especially if he hates him now or something, SO even if he used to look up at Sun as his ex-student or ex-partner, and now we know he is NOT, he would prefer to not look so similar any more.
He can choose any other look, but he doesn't. Why? Well, maybe he actually cannot. Maybe this isn't an appearance he has specifically chosen, maybe this is his 'basic' comfy form and any other form would just take too much energy to keep up. And looking at the really tiny probability of two very similar monkeys just "poofing" out of nowhere, I dare to say, Macaque wasn't born (I mean like Sun Wukong or any other demon), but he was specifically created. And here is a question: on someone's purpose or not? Maybe the power of great Monkey King was so strong so the part of it just jumped from him and formed into another similar creature, but let me say it's just weird and I prefer the theory of Sun Wukong being so bored and lonely after his master's (Tripitaka) death, and he created a brother for himself from his own shadow. Just to have someone, anyone.
So Wukong created Macaque and then what? He trained him, he taught him everything he knew, maybe even he shared his powers with him. Some great great bonding time. But as Macaque said, something drew them apart. It is visible that Macaque blamed Monkey King for this, for 'forgetting him'. Before speculation of what happened then between them, let's focus on what Macaque showed us what he wants now.
We have two episodes, both show different sides of him. In season 1, Macaque's main goal is to steal Monkey King's power from Mk, and then to very specifically revenge. He visibly does not want to defeat Sun Wukong, he wants to hurt him as much as possible. Look: when Monkey King showed up, Macaque totally forgot about Mk. And then, when he's so close to defeat him, instead of that he turned to Mk and tried to kill the teenager. Mk is just a tool to hurt Sun Wukong.
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And we can't forget how Macaque constantly pointed out all the weak sides of Sun, he's basically just saying on and on "you're weak, you're weak, you're so weak, I'm so strong, I'm strong, you are so weak". Which really fits the feeling of being forgotten because he was weaker and Monkey King was stronger, better, glorious and famous. Macaque really feels like that, he really tried to make Sun Wukong feel his pain by dominating him.
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On the other hand, we see that Sun constantly striked off him. He said almost nothing to him, just "Aren't you bored of keep being in my shadow? It's time to give back what you've stolen" and that was fricking all. For Monkey King, Macaque is a just shadow, always behind him, something you turn around and leave behind to not see it and to forget, like an unwanted past. An unnecessary problem, that irritatingly keeps returning to him. He does not want to interact to not make even a slight more bond between them, he wants to delete him from his life forever, and omg WHY. At this end of the ep, Sun Wukong did not even mention Macaque. He really doesn't care at all (or extremely tries to not care). His HATE is almost touchable, ouch.
In season 2, Sun Wukong LEFT US ALL ALONE. Macaque showed up again, he played with Mk a bit, and... Left? That's the thing, you see, he doesn't need to hurt or kill Mk. All we see is Macaque talking about his past and then letting Mk experience something the 'hero' in the story should have felt. The guilt. When Mk interpreted his story differently, seeing himself as the warrior, Macaque corrected him. Cause he doesn't care about Mk at all. He heard how Mk told him about what hurt him, and here is a funny point, because if Macaque needs to be understood, listening to Mk and talking with him (such a simple act of empathy, they both needed it then, guh) should have been enough. Mk really felt the 'warrior' character in the story, so he understood what Macaque felt. But surprisingly, that was not what the demon carved.
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Macaque chose to make Mk feel like Monkey King at the moment something drew the demons apart. He wanted to force Mk to be sorry, to apologize, to regret his mistakes, cause he failed with forcing Monkey King to feel that. But! Maybe he is not as purely innocent and poorly forlorn. We see the flashback for a half of second before Mk hit him with Staff:
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We see Sun Wukong attacking Macaque who's in his demon (true) form.
Let's repeat this: Macaque felt as if a friend left him in the past. He said a friend did this to have all the "hero's glory" for themselves. We know Sun Wukong could do such a thing, especially before he met Tripitaka, but 1. In my theory Macaque is created after Tripitaka's death and 2. If (as my theory said) Sun created Macaque to not feel so lonely, he would never leave him for such a thing. So Macaque hides something for sure, something he did, something so terrible that made Sun Wukong attack him and not want to know him anymore. How horrendous thing Macaque did that made Sun Wukong choose to be alone again and to forget his dear brother he created by himself?
Back to the great bonding time, repeating speculation of "oh maybe they even share the powers" and comparing it to Macaque wanting to steal Mk's power, my theory here is saying:
Sun Wukong taught Macaque the technique of the same powers as he knew, but Macaque overused it (probably wanting to see how powerful he is, probably showing off and killing so many harmless people) doing terrible terrible things. So Monkey King took all of the powers from him and left him alone, powerless, with the last painful words: "Dont you dare to show in front of my eyes ever again". Of course Macaque was hurt, of course he didn't see why he's the bad guy, because he did not care about people at all. And of course Sun Wukong was hurt too.
Maybe he came back to the village Macaque had destroyed and following a quiet crying he found a little baby with a heart so clear and he put into him all Macaque's powers, making them sleep until the time will be right... But back to the series!
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Yes exactly. Why did he destroy the lantern and leave? Why did he suddenly lose interest in teasing Mk and stop forcing him to feel guilty?
First thing, he saw Mk is ready to fight for his friends seriously. He still cared so much about them, not like Monkey King about Macaque. That was hard to swallow, that was hard to watch for the demon. That was't the thing he wanted to see. And second, the flashback. Maybe the sudden realization that he actually did something bad. Cause Sun Wukong didn’t just leave him, he cast him out. It was hard to admit that he actually deserved this (or maybe much more), it’s much easier to blame others, not yourself. So Macaque felt “that’s enough” and left. Mk brought him to this uncomfortable point of admitting the truth. Which he didn’t want to. Maybe in the following eps, he will see it, but now Macaque just isn’t ready yet. But the last talk with Mk gives me a little hope. He stopped treating him like a tool or toy, he was actually talking with him like with a person, he even warned him about Lady Bone Demon.
Maybe (maybe) one day he'll see that humans aren't just useless creatures he can carelessly kill, maybe Mk will make him care and realize what he's done, but that's just speculation in speculation, he could die before he reaches that point, maybe he is already dead....
And that's it. That is all I wrote on ao3, but in the fanfic I put much more details and I build those characters up much more than here. This is only rough rough short-saying, I'm really sorry if you read it all
Oh and here is a link if you liked this above i'd love if you read the fanfic thank you
172 notes · View notes
heyitsyn · 3 years
Text
MANAGER!SEIJOH AU
a/n: this is kind of an au like what if you were
for more seijoh content, check this masterlist out!
anon:
- 🥺👉🏻👈🏻 i would like to request a seijoh!manager reader who’s a first year and is siblings with ushi and the team’s reaction to finding out that she was supposed to go to shiratorizawa with ushi and their reaction with her getting along with the shiratorizawa volleyball team and maybe the manager is a small cute soft little energetic ball of sunshine 🥺🥺 also hewwo, hope youre doing well! ☺️ -🎷🐛
- Ir seijoh manager series is so gooood. Can we get something where by some weird reason yn-chan is close to ushijima and tendou and the seijoh boys dont know about it and how they'd react to her being so affectionate w them ahahwindkdn
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EVERYONE SHUT UP AND LOOK AT HOW FREAKING PRETTY TENDOU IS LIKE AKLFDJLASKFJDLSKFJDSFLKD
okayokayokay
so this is a what if thing
like what if ushijima was your older brother
SLKFDJADFLIJSDKLDF I CAN ALREADY IMAGINE OIKAWA SCREAMING
you didnt exactly have the best relationship with your mom
you remember when you were younger that she used to yell at your brother for using his left hand and you got angry a lot because you were fiercely protective of your brother
this caused her to yell at you too for being nosy and being involved in something you shouldnt be in
duh we know that ushi’s dad takashi actually supported him for this and protected him too and you were also a papa’s girl so you always ran to him
he understood you both better and while your mother worked, he was at home taking care of you two
then when they mentioned wanting to separate, you were very sad but somewhat relieved
mostly because you hated hearing your parents arguing and you felt bad for your brother as he constantly did whatever to get you out of the house
thats what brought on your love for volleyball
you werent exactly the best player but you were interested in it and often watched matches with him
but you also liked volleyball because your brother liked it
you liked whatever your brother liked
he adored you too and he was a boy who didnt talk much due to your mother but he was always a talker with you
especially when you couldnt sleep, he would sneak you out of your room and you both would run to the kitchen and eat ice cream
even with just a 2 year age difference, he looked as if he was older than you due to his massive height
‘just wait nii-chan! i will drink enough milk to reach your height!’
*insert lenny face*
AKLDJFSLDKFJDF I HATE MYSELF
CAN I PLEASE DIE
however
when they divorced, you thought your father would take both you and ushi
like the lady at the court even asked you where you wanted to go and not a breath of hesitation you chose your father
you weren’t very concerned because you knew your brother was going to choose your dad as you both were closer to him
so imagine your surprise when he said he didnt care and naturally, the mother would get the child
lowkey you felt hella betrayed and when your dad whisked you away overseas, there was this grudge you held against toshi
yall youre like 5
i would be hella mad too if my brother chose the person who yells at him all the time
in california, your father made sure you still remembered your brother and you tried to detach from the japanese lifestyle to your new one but you just couldnt
maybe around 6 years you were already fed up with the hot california heat and you wanted to go back to japan to see toshi again
you got over that grudge years ago but your mother refused to have any contact or anything to do with your father and so that included you too
she refused to let you both video chat and any type of connection
your dad obviously noticed your sad expressions and your obvious longing to go back to your brother again and so he arranged something
you shut the door gently before taking off your shoes by the doorway
the large house was often quiet except for the constant typing of a keyboard in your father’s study
‘tadaima’
you meekly mumbled but his sense of hearing never wavered so he heard your voice
‘oh? y/n?’
his voice echoed through the hallways and you heard his chair squeak as it was moved back so he could stand
your sock-cladded feet padded against the hard wood floor and you walked towards his study where indeed he was standing there
your father has definitely aged yet his job as a coach made him as fit as he was decades ago
as much as it disgusted you, you could tell what your friends meant when they said your dad was good-looking
they actually said your dad was hot but you refuse to acknowledge that
you and your friends are like 12 tf
you closed the door and sat down on the loveseat at the corner of the room as it was your designated spot
‘hey, papa’
you greeted with a smile and he gave you the same grin
‘i ordered f/f (favorite food) for dinner tonight so try and listen for the bell to ring, okay?’
you nodded
there was bit of small talk and you asked about his team while he asked about school and you both arranged to hang out over the weekend at some ice cream shop
the conversation dragged on until you heard the doorbell and you ran to the door to answer the delivery man
your dad put out the plates on the table and you excitedly dug in
‘also, you remember your grandmother? and her terrible back?’
oh god of course you did
they lived about 30 minutes away from your house in japan and she constantly worried your father bc the woman was approaching 90 and was still picking peppers!
with old coach ukai
‘what did she do now?’
your father chuckled at the exasperation in your voice
‘she misses you. says something about the family’s princess needing to go back to her country or something’
there was a smile in your face
your grandmother was your favorite and she always said you were the princess
she hated your mother because of how insensitive she was so she only acknowledged you as the only other female in the family
obviously your brother was also liked but there was just a special bond between you and your grandmother
‘so when are we going back?’
you asked and it was clear that you were excited at the thought of going back to japan as you havent been back since you moved due to your father’s busy job and your school
takashi swallowed his food before revealing the news
‘actually, if you want, you could finish your schooling there. but only until college first though because your old man needs you over here too’
nah bro you didnt even care about the last part
literally your fork fell to the table and you shrieked 
‘WHAT?! SERIOUSLY?!’
and thus brought you back to japan
you stayed with your grandmother on your dad’s side and you quickly got accustomed back to japan life
OH
your BROTHER!
okay
so waka-chan def heard you coming back
your mother was grumbling about it the other day and he was sure he heard your name in there
‘sdkfjkdslfjdkslfj y/n dkfjlsdkfjldkf’
LMAO THATS ME TRYING TO SAY THAT WAKA COULDNT UNDERSTAND WHAT SHE SAID SINCE SHE WAS MUMBLING SHE WASNT KEYBOARD SMASHING LMAO
there was a mutual giddiness in there too and he was excited to see you again after many years without contact
however
there was a bit of fear in there that thought back to when you were younger and his choice of not really having a specific parent despite your pleads to stay together with him
but he was going to make sure your bond was still intact!
he would do anything in his power to do so!
when you arrived
your dad accompanied you back to japan and you both were walking out to the exit of the airport when you saw your grandmother excitedly waving a sign around
in bold sparkly letters, it said ‘USHIJIMA’
okay wait i love grandma usui 
you quickly ran over to her and she grasped you into her arms
‘nana’
you sobbed and she hugged you tightly
‘im so happy youre back home’
your father shook hands with the friend she brought to help drive you guys back home
old man ukai was basically the chauffeur but hes really good friends with your nana so it was okay
the entire ride you guys basically caught up with each other and you couldnt help but laugh whenever your dad would go on a rant about your grandma being too reckless and your nana defending herself
‘oh stop it, takashi. i was only given one life and if it’s over, it’s over. for now, ill live it how i see fit!’
your old family home was exactly as you remember it but you didnt expect the 6′2 boy in the living room
‘nii-chan’
you meekly whispered and he let out a soft smile before opening his big arms
you ran into them and he held you tightly
‘i missed you. so much’
he whispered and you nodded 
it was def such a nice thing to have your brother again
oooo your dad been knew that you would be sticking to waka like you did when you were itty bitty young
so when you practically begged waka to stay at your nana’s house the entire summer, he couldnt refuse you
duh your mom went to see you but you just quietly sat there and smiled at her
polite but distant
due to being around waka so much, you naturally went to his volleyball practices and their training camp
there
you met his friends and you guys quickly got acquainted especially with tendo bc he was just so fun
and he was your brother’s boyfriend best friend
the others were still kinda distant with you ahem ahem im looking at you shirabu
but they were mostly amazed at how powerful the genetics played in your appearances because wowza you were beautiful
lmao dont let waka hear them say that bc they would be benched all season in a single snap
during training camp, you usually sat at the sides or you would be their stand-in manager
goshiki absolutely LOVES you!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
GOSHIKI MY SON MY BABY
him and you were the same age so there was an easier way of being friends and your energies just matched so well
he would run up to you whenever he got a play right and you would ruffle his hair affectionately
LADKSJFLDSKFS FLASHBACK TO TENDO!SISTER X GOSHIKI
‘y/n-chan!’
‘y/n-chan!’
‘y/n-chan!’
hell even ushi was getting annoyed at goshiki’s constant need for you
tendo would steal you away and he would be giggling to you about how adorable you were and you just giggled along bc wow this beautiful man is really talking to me right now
ALKSDJFLKSF CAN YOU TELL IM ALSO A TENDOODOO SIMP?
‘cmere, y/n-chan. i taught toshi this the other day and he was very impressed and wanted me to do it again. okay so it goes in a rhyme, ya ready?’
you nodded along and he shot you a close-eyed smile before starting to draw on the dirt with a stick
‘there once was a man with-’
lets just say
you were definitely your brother’s sister
sometimes though
you would try and go towards the calmer players to get away from the rowdiness from baby daddy tendo and baby goshiki
you would find them at the gym just doing drills and at the sight of you, they would turn red but continue playing
they didnt really mind seeing you there bc youve always been such a positive energy and cheered them on which gave them strength
‘NICE ONE OHIRA-SAN!’
‘WAHHH SO COOL YAMAYAMA-SAN!’
you were like a cute ball of serotonin >o<
‘wah, of course its expected for you guys to be the top in the prefecture. youre like,,,,, silent but deadly~!’
duh a compliment from a girl?
dead
shirabu’s bangs would get in the way of his vision sometimes yall i will never stop making fun of that ridiculously adorable haircut so you would use a clip and tuck it away for him
this big babie is so awkward that he turns red when you whisper in his ear that you were done
semisemi baby and you got along bc you guys had a similar taste in music and because you lived in california, he was fascinated that you were in the music capital of america
‘did you see celebrities down the street?’
he asked you excitedly one day during lunch
you stopped then smiled softly
‘semisemi-kun, i didnt live at that part of california’
nah to him, america is just filled with celebrities
OH DEAR BABY BOY KAWANISHI
taichi is a generally quiet guy
like you thought he was actually selectively mute when you first met him
but you gradually got him to talk and you would help him whenever he would want to practice
usually it was during the ungodly hours of the morning
you woke up and went to grab a drink from the common room but you noticed his large build exiting the door so you followed him into the gym
‘kawanishi-san?’
you called out and felt guilty when he jumped 
‘oh, hey’
he aknowledged
‘wha-’
you stopped to yawn causing your eyes to close making you miss the brief second of softness that flashed in his eyes
‘what are you doing?’
you tiredly asked
taichi dusted off his trackpants after kneeling down to rummage through his bag and you couldnt help but gawk at his height
‘im training early’
he answered
‘why? is it because you want to keep up with the others?’
you mumbled and he was surprised for a second but reverted back to his stoic expression
‘i have to make sure i am able to reach my seniors level for next year’
taichi turned away to grab a stray ball and you moved to go to the storage room for the ball cart
‘oi, what are you doing? go back to bed’
he said from the other side of the gym but you just looked back at him with a tired grin
‘meh, i want to spend time with you, senpai’
you reasoned
he shook his head before walking over to you then ruffled your hair
‘no wonder youre so tiny. you dont sleep enough and let your body grow’
yep that was the closest youve gotten to taichi joking with you
usually, hes training and when hes in the zone, nothing else has his attention but the ball
maybe thats why the others ahem goshiki has said that he was very scary
his game face was practically a mean face
basically you spent the entire training camp with them and then soon, you were going back to school
duh everyone hmm maybe not shirabu bc he most definitely read the school book of rules thought you would be going to shiratorizawa with them 
but you broke the news to them one afternoon and imagine the tears from both tendo and goshiki
‘WHHYYYY!!!!’
‘NOOO!!!!!’
‘why can’t you?’
semi asked and you were about to answer when shirabu beat you to it
‘the school doesnt allow late transfers’
oh right
the american school system was set in a different schedule than a japanese school system
it was considered the summer for them yet school already started a few months ago
since shiratorizawa was a very academically and physically prestigious school, they refused anyone who would potentially be late or behind their curriculum
‘so where ya headed to then, chibi?’
tendou pouted and you leaned against his arm
‘hmm some school named aoba johsai? i dont know its near my grannie’s so that’s all that mattered’
oh dear
USHIJIMA NO Y/N WILL NOT ASK TOORU TO GO TO SHIRATORIZAWA
they consider seijoh a rival bc theyve played against them practically in every prefecture tournament and they were worried for that infamous setter
‘ne, y/n-chan, promise us that you won’t be swept away by them! especially a guy named oikawa tooru!’
uhhh
well
tendou’s warning was kinda ignored bc you ended up being seijoh’s manager
hehe
surprise?
but they weren’t really really shocked tho bc they knew you liked volleyball so you would naturally be in the volleyball team
even as a manager
meanwhile in seijohhh
OooOOOoOoOooooo sEiJOOhHHHH~~~~~~
okay so you were actually registered under your father’s last name usui rather than the ushijima last name
therefore you werent exactly immediately known as HEY! USHIJIMA’S SISTER!
you still became the manager the way you did as mentioned in part 1 
and you still are their adorable baby manager
you were aware of their oikawa’s hatred for wakawaka so you try not to talk about him even though youre literally the closest person to him
was it traitorous? 
maybe
but you actually even help them when they practice
duh the boys are like eyebrow raise emoji 
‘wow youre really into volleyball, huh, manager-chan?’
matsukawa commented and you just smiled
‘hmm, my family likes it so ive picked up a thing or two’
LMAO
little do they know your brother is literally the best volleyball player around and is a member of the under 19 team and your father is a volleyball coach in america and would someday be someone iwaizumi hajime (19) would apprentice under
there was a lot of times you thought you would slip up like your home screen was of you and waka but youve been careful to cover it up
BUT
you cant always be sneaky
it was during the first day of the tournament and you were filling up their water bottles I SWEAR WHY IS MANAGER-CHAN ALWAYS FILLING UP WATER BOTTLES when you found a familiar bunch of boys at the end of the hallway just chatting
you havent seen tendou and the boys in so long so you placed the bottles down and rushed over there so quickly
‘TOMUTOMU!’
you shouted and the oddly-haired boy turned and he gasped before grabbing you into a large hug
this grabbed tendou’s attention and he cheered then hugged you too
your giggles and happy cheers were so infectous and they just absolutely missed you so much 
these tall boys were at a advantage so someone scooped you up and you were just affectionately being talked to and hugged and LKDSJFSLDFJ SO LUCKY SO LOVED
meanwhile
the plant babies were wondering where the heck you went to 
‘y/n-chan?! where is she?!’
oikawa panicked quickly while iwaizumi hit him to shut up
‘be quiet! you won’t find her if you’re too busy freaking out!’
‘ill find her’
matsukawa volunteered and they nodded, feeling at ease of him being capable to find you if you were in trouble
but when he returned empty-handed and with large eyes, they knew something was up
they ran behind mattsun to stop and copy his shocked expression at the sight in front of them
is that
you?
with
shi
ra
to
ri
za
wa
oh my god
‘y/n-chan!’
oikawa shouted, being the first to speak
you jumped and your own eyes widened
‘oh. oh no’
you mumbled
the others were so stunned and seijoh itself was so hard to make speechless but they were just shocked
period
‘what is happening’
iwaizumi mumbled
yea the others were just shocked period
‘hey guys’
you waved and you motioned them closer
‘uhh,,, well,,, um they are my friends’
you smiled uneasily and they could see that
‘aaand?’
oikawa signalled you to say everything bc he knew it wasnt the whole story
you sighed
‘ushi,,, jima is my brother’
you mumbled the last part
but they heard you
‘HAH?!’
you cringed and the shira boys were about to move to protect you but they saw you glare at them
‘what? what about it? hes my brother? and?’
you babbled
‘but,, why are you,, in seijoh? dont get me wrong! its just,, youd naturally go to shiratorizawa right?’
mattsun waved his hands around and asked the question thats bugging the team
‘i came to the country late’
‘THE COUNTRY?!’
well,,
turns out you havent exactly told them everything about you yet :/
even when youve cleared the air and introduced waka as your brother, seijoh still didnt say anything
they were stuck in this shocked and surprised moment even at the end of the day and when you went straight to the shiratorizawa team,
they watched with wide eyes as you laughed with goshiki and was jumping around with tendou
‘AH! TOMU! MY HAIR!’
‘TORI-SAN! SATORI-SAN! TAKE THAT!’
wow you were actually really beautiful when youre happy
‘i dont think ive seen her this happy with this much energy’
makki said and they nodded
it was true
you were usually calm and collected and was the perfect balance to this chaotic team
so seeing you so free and loose with them was so refreshing, even if it was with damn ushiwaka
you finally went back to the seijoh boys and they all sent glares to the violet team before sending you a smile
‘you ready to go, manager-chan?’
watari ruffled your hair before handing you your bag to start walking to the bus
‘yea. lets go home’
as you all walked, oikawa was already starting his tantrum
‘y/n-chan~! why aren’t you that happy around us? are we not enough for you?’
oikawa whined and pouted
but you just turned to smiled at him and stopped walking to pat his head
‘im not their manager, therefore im not pressured to act like anyone except as a friend and a spectator. but i try to be as professional as i can with you guys to make sure you dont appear bad to others. and you guys are perfectly chaotic enough, adding me into the mix will just about kill coach’
oikawa didnt seem satisfied though
‘but! thats not fair! they get to see you smile and i dont!’
iwaizumi growled at him to be quiet but you beat him to it
well
you smiled at tooru but your eyes shone maliciously
‘i knew you would act like this, oikawa-san. as punishment, i gave nii-chan your phone number. good luck avoiding him now’
oikawa screamed
a/n: AAWWWWW LETS NOT KILL COACH IRIHATA OKAY? HES LIKE OUR GRANPAPA AND PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE LEAVE OIKAWA ALONE WAKAWAKA-KUN!
590 notes · View notes
mypimpademia · 3 years
Text
Shinso x reader, Mina x reader, Kaminari x reader, Kirishima x reader
TW: Swearing
Note: another part of my high school AU! I've been wanting to write for some characters that I dont write too often, and I thought this would be the best way, enjoy!
Thank you to @katsuflossy for helping me w shinso and Kaminaris soccer parts😭
Taglist: @myhoodacademia @katsuflossy @iiminibattlehero @ecao @nnnoya @hawklmaoo @strawberry-ice @mixfi @wolfkid22 @mythiccheroacademia @myfandemons @lilsparkyswife @her-majesty-kiara @mindofess @kqtsukisgf @1-800-s1mping @angiebug101 @mads-fairy @solar3lunar
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SHINSO.
He's one of the people that genuinely perfers being alone most of the time
And hes very intimidating to most people, but most realize that he's pretty chill and cool if you just talk to him
Hitoshi would be on the soccer team too
Number 12 baby (Ronaldinho's number)
Hed play midfield, and have insane control over the ball
Hes calm on the field just like he is off it
But he gets a little competitive sometimes, might have to sit down and take a breather for a second
He sometimes ends up talking shit about his opponents, and he is NOT quiet about it
Will look the exact player he's talking about dead in the eye and say that shit
"I'll knock your knees out if you push me again."
And he plays a little dirty, might kick the ball around in away that'll make people fall on their ass just to get a laugh out of it
He steps on and kicks shins too
Hes really the soccer teams MVP, they went one game without him an lost and realized just how much of a key he was to them
Hitoshi sees you as his good luck charm during games, if you're not there he feels like he can't play his absolute best
Good luck kisses before he goes on the field are mandatory, if you dont give him one or forget, youre gonna get a very sweaty hug after the game
Hitoshi has only ever come to school in sweatpants and hoodies, and only wears jeans or something other than his usual once a week just so he can switch it up
He probably comes in with major bags under his eyes and smelling like coffee
And just a little bit late
He normally goes out to eat during lunch, and always takes you with him and let's you choose
You're honestly the most underrated couple in school
The loner boy and his gorgeous s/o, it's basically a real life wattpad story
When people try flirting with you, he tries getting his soccer cleats out on them and you have to stop him before someone gets hurt
Hitoshi is just underrated overall and no one but you and his friens realize, give him more recognition </3
MINA.
The really nice popular girl of course
But one of the popular people whose popularity actually means something for once
Gets along with basically the whole school
And she makes sure everyone knows she belongs to you and you belong to her
"Mhm, I've got a pretty s/o, and I love them soo much."
Probably posts you on all her socials (that the whole school follows) everyday
Mina has been in pretty much every club and team, which is exactly how she got popular
She joins as many as she can every year, but her favorites are dance and volleyball, maybe soccer too
For dance she likes to show you her routines, and maybe even teach you how to do them if you're down for it
"How was that?!"
"You wanna learn it too, babe? I could teach you!"
She's the captain of every team she's been on
It honestly just comes from her being so charismatic and the way she can get along with people and bring everyone together
Mina is 100% best dressed
Best everything honestly
Best dressed, Best hair, all that
She's cool with all the staff members, so sometimes the turn a blind eye if she decides to head out at random even when she's not supposed to
The two of you are Thee School Couple
Everyone wishes they were you guys or at least had a relationship like the one you had
Everyone would be in tears if yall so much as fought
So 10/10 for both of you
KAMINARI.
Certified pretty play boy
Hes a flirt, and friendly, and super popular
But the playboy act dropped once the two of you got together, because that's when everyone saw how much of a simp he was for you
Denki would just constantly fawn and gush over you, it would be annoying if it were anyone else, but it was just so cute to see him be so crazy for someone after he was basically known for never being tied down
Hes on the soccer team with Shinso!
Number 5 <3
Who did you think was calming Shinso down when he got mad??? Definitely not their other teammates
Hes the teams striker, and him an Shinso are so coordinated on the field together it leaves their own teammates in shock everytime
Hes a good sport (unlike Shinso), and is very friendly with his opponents
Wishes them luck before the game, helps them up if they fall, even says 'My bad!' If he accidentally trips someone, and tells the good job if they lose
Like Shinso, good luck kisses are a must
They're more like good luck make outs with him, and he usually ends up getting so wrapped up in them that he only makes it to the field by the skin of his teeth (he gets yelled at by the coach a lot)
He gets so god damn DIRTY on the field
And it doesn't even make sense because he really doesn't slide around or fall too much
He just manages to come out covered in dirt, and the sweat doesn't make it better
Oh, and even if you give him a good luck kiss, he still hugs you after the game
He doesn't do it to be mean, he just gets excited when he's on the field and has a bunch of energy left when games are over
Denki takes you to get ice cream after games. Shinso third wheels sometimes, but it's cool and not awkward at all because you're all besties
Denki is the most popular guy in school, and he'd be most popular overall if it weren't for Mina
You guys get rated cutest couple by all the students because no one had seen Denki simp till you came along and it was just too cute
Everyone wishes they could be yall </3
And half the school has beef with you because you're dating Denki and they're jealous
But you guys are still an adorable and amazing couple so who cares
KIRISHIMA.
The super sweet and popular jock!
Hes the older sibling to all the people younger than him and in lower grades
Hes on the football team of course
The quarterback too
Number 44
Hes that player that the coach is really trying to get a scholarship for
The one the coach pulls off to the side and says "son, let me talk to you..." and then tells him how far he'll go
Colleges are already scouting him
Most of the school is crushing on him honestly
But they all know that he's all for you and only you
Eiji gives you kisses before games, after games and sometimes when there's a long enough break he'll run and kiss you really quick
Hes a vv good sport, always wishes players good luck and says nice job after games, and separates any of his teammates that try to fight w their opponents then say sorry
It's usually Bakugo hes separating because hes on the football team with Eiji when he's not in Boxing
Everyone that's younger than you sees you and kiri as big siblings, and those older see you as cousins
Yall are just that couple that everyone loves
The whole school basically gushes when you walk in wearing his letterman jacket or one of his football jerseys
You're the couple the doesn't disgust everyone when you kiss in the halls <3
224 notes · View notes
lvlyhao · 3 years
Text
『you’re dating him but he’s not your bias』
reaction fic; NCT Dream
A/N: this is nct dream’s reaction to realizing your bias is not him (and you’re a couple). gender neutral, got way too deep at some points and was NOT meant to be this long. enjoy.
note that english is my second language and i speak mixing slang, accents and spellings from 3283928 places so i did notice there’s practice written with both s and c down there so
just dont mind it pls
also, today’s photo theme is dream looking cute in low quality shots.
𝓖𝓮𝓷𝓻𝓮𝓼: fluff (♡), angst (❆), comedy (☼), crack (⍢).
𝓦𝓪𝓻𝓷𝓲𝓷𝓰𝓼: lots of swearing, my tough love for the neos, one mention of cheating that doesn’t actually happen, a couple of mentions of alcohol and drinking, some violence hidden in metaphors, me being chaotic, it got a bit more angsty and darker than i intended, but we do have all happy endings.
word count: 6.8K
pairing: nct dream members x reader ( includes mark, renjun, jeno, haechan, jaemin, chenle, jisung)
disclaimer: the characters in the story below do not reflect real people or present real facts. this is purely fictional, and you may not copy, change, translate or repost my work in any way. all rights reserved © cherry-hyejin 2021.
*✧・゚: *✧・゚:*✧・゚: *✧・゚:*✧・゚: *✧・゚:*✧・゚: *✧・゚:*✧・゚: *✧・゚:*✧・゚: *✧・゚:
Mark
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oh, poor baby
i feel like he would be a little heartbroken 
just a little
not so much if it’s someone from dream, because they’re his little brothers, but if it’s one of his hyungs from 127 or wayv,,,,,
boy might cry
he’s not super dramatic about it or anything but i don’t see him as being super confident about himself
so he might think like
“do they think he’s cooler than me?”
and it’s silly, yes, he knows
but it’s just something that pops up in his mind sometimes when you bring him up
so for the sake of this fanfic let’s pretend you’re johnny biased
because gods know i am
at least when it comes to 127
mark would be divided into fanboying with you and being like “YO, HE’S THE COOLEST GUY ON EARTH OH MY GOD I’M SO GLAD YOU AGREE”
and
“a h”
<gives you a little tiny smile to cover up the sound of his heart breaking>
would constantly try to get closer to you when johnny is around, and just
showing off in little (kinda dumb) ways
complimenting you
being even more whipped than usual
like yes he’ll give you all of his watermelon slices just please don’t look at johnny like that again
i think johnny would kind of play into it with the whole “imma steal your s/o” thing
and he doesn’t do it to make mark jealous or hurt
we know he’d rather get hit by a train than ever actually upsetting his son on purpose
but we also know he’s johnny
cue “OH DUDE HE’S FLIRTING”
so yeah he might call you lil pet names (beautiful, cutie, you get it)
just to see you giggle 
(and see your soul leave your body)
might say he’s taking you out for dinner when he’s just driving you to get more ice cream for a movie night with the gang lol
and winks
expect a lot of winks
anywhere and anytime
which makes mark sometimes feel like he’s intruding???
and that you appreciate johnny more than him???
he genuinely doesn’t understand how you can date him and still not have him as your bias
don’t you like, love him above everyone else or smth lol
his “showing off” phase eventually fades tho
now every time you hang you with the boys and johnny is around, he’ll be a bit more distant 
he thinks he’s giving you space to interact with his friends but he’s just shying away from competing with one of his favourite people ever
and it’s a competition that Does Not Exist™
but he’s not 100% aware of that
and you’re not that dense 
so ofc you notice
and you wait till you two are alone to talk to him, and he BEGRUDGINGLY admits that you being johnny biased makes him feel kinda small and unimportant
he’d never try to make you change your bias or anything
he just needs reminders that he’s your #1 boy sometimes
which is fine by you
and by him
cus now it’s you calling him pet names all the time
and hugging him
and kissing his cheek
and praising his work
and blowing kisses from across the room
and just telling him straight up that no matter what, you’ll always go to him
(not that you ever had any chance with johnny lmao)
THIS GOES TO SHOW COMMUNICATING IS KEY, CHILDREN
COMMUNICATE
Renjun
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wym donghyuck is your bias lol
literally are you fucking kidding him
don’t get me wrong ok
everyone knows renjun loves haechan
they’re bffs and could not live without each other
but at the same time,,,
what is wrong with you
who did he choose as his s/o gods help him
if it was jeno, or mark, or jaehyun, or winwin, or kun, or lucas, or yuta, or taeyong, or ten, or,,,,
literally ANY of his other members
he’d understand your point and be like “ok fine”
but haechan???? hmmm bestie no
he’s not gonna throw a fit
not after the first time you told him anyways
HE WAS SURPRISED OKAY
and he just whined very loudly after having laughed for 5 minutes thinking it was a joke
<flashbacks of that one time he had to sing the ottoke song with haechan on weekly idol>
if you don’t know that iconic scene, renjun had a whole ass meltdown in 3 seconds while yelling “aAAAAAH JINJJAAAAA” and getting ready to punch the living shit out of hyuck
for no reason other than the fact that it’s haechan we’re talking about and injun’s little body is filled with rage
BACK ON TRACK
would probably try to act all cool about it and be like “i don’t mind” but bruh does he mind
and it doesn’t help that haechan is such a little shit about it
he doesn’t even flirt with you
he just
constantly reminds renjun that he’s your bias—not him—and then constantly praises himself over you
“ah, y/n~ did you choose me as your bias because i’m the best vocalist? or was it because i’m the best dancer? mAYBE IT WAS BECAUSE OF MY OH SO BROAD SHOULDERS—”
(pause for injun to punch him)
(unpaused)
and ok in the beginning it was funny seeing him all worked up but now it’s just annoying to be in the same room as these two
haechan won’t let either of you live
and renjun just wants to
fight
so it eventually gets to the point where you’ll talk to renjun and jeno will talk to hyuck cus even the other dreamies are tired of it
except maybe for chenle, he always laughs his ass off when they start bickering
ANYWAY
your conversation goes something like “oh my god renjun i’m literally dating you, i don’t like haechan better or anything you little pile of fury”
while jeno sits hyuck down in front of him and jaemin and just
“bro why are you like this”
“bro”
no but renjun would apologize for going overboard with his protectiveness and jealous energy because he’s not generally like that
he’s angry all the time but never about something involving you, you know
he tries his best to treat you like the royalty you are
but something about hyuck being your bias makes him feel a bit like a castaway???
he’s very creative and as an artsy kid myself i know we’re very prone to feeling left out because we’re just different from the others
so he’d think maybe haechan really has a better voice
or better dancing skills
or he looks better
he is taller than injun after all, and has broader shoulders, and his hair is all fluffy and—
the whole thing just made him insecure about things he had settled with himself long ago
he was fine with being him
but not so much when it came to that
i don’t think you two would fight over it cus tbh i think renjun would really only get with someone who can be very understanding of him
and i think hyuck would actually apologize to renjun too
not when everyone’s around but like, maybe after dinner or something and he just needs to feel like they’re besties again
hyuck never meant for things to get out of control
he just really likes both injun and you as his friends, and aside from skinship his most prominent love language is,,,
teasing
he was really just trying (very poorly) to grow closer to the person his best friend loves so much—you—because renjun is SUCH a big part of his life it would just feel wrong to not be good friends with you as well
don’t tell them i said this but they hug it out
injun strikes me as someone that could take a bit of time to bounce back from something that hurt his pride or his sense of belonging
and his way of healing and bonding is just,,,
art
sure, keep being haechan biased, but also please read with him
and talk about his fantastic animal creations
and watch those buzzfeed unsolved alien theory videos because he really wants to discuss it and maybe even draw what he thinks the aliens look like
hyuck tones it down, you make sure renjun knows you like him for him, renjun starts to (secretly) appreciate hyuck’s talent along with you...
and now let’s take a moment to imagine the minute you watch their latest mv with injun by your side
and yes okay the first thing you see is CLEARLY how good renjun looks because holy fucking shit he’s an angel (and i’m clearly not renjun biased)
but then,,,,,,
wAS THAT A HAECHAN HIGH NOTE
(there’s always a haechan high note, just look for it)
and ok maybe he did scream a bit with you because of how good it all sounded
and you know what, it works out perfectly bc you two are my new otp and you were meant for each other
but we do have to mention the eventual happening of chenle saying like “oOoOoOoH y/N wErE yOu dRoOliNg oVeR hAeChAn AgAiN” after a special stage
and then you, injun and hyuck all attempt to choke him
i’m kidding
or not
Jeno
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ah, lee jeno
aka samoyed boi
yes i do call him that no i will not stop
everyone is always writing jeno as being super protective and literally about to burst a lung if someone else ever does as much as look at you
but i just 
don’t see him that way
he’s a taurus and from what i know about taurus they can be v v jealous, yes, but they mainly seek comfort
so he’s fine with you biasing jaemin
as long as you’re not ditching him or anything lol
and ok, imma be 100% honest here even if it sounds like literal no fun (jenojaem wink wonk)
jaemin doesn’t flirt with you
not any more than he flirts with
every other breathing creature
ever
he’s really only platonically interested in you, never remotely romantic or anything lol
on the other side, he is in love with jeno
basically, if jaemin is your bias, jeno is his
so nothing really changes
we know how nomin are, okay
they hold hands, they stare deeply into each other eyes, they nearly kiss at least once every time they go live
it's just them
you gotta respect it bruh
i know this is the most boring reaction ever so let’s create the one (1) instance where jeno would actually dislike that you bias someone else
i think he would feel a bit hurt if you seemed to be more supportive of jaemin’s work than his
and it’s not something big or on purpose
it’s just something like going with him to a recording session but not going with jeno because you have homework
or after a very busy practise day going to praise jaemin first
even if it’s just three words
“you did good”
and then you’re going towards him, he’s gonna feel like maybe he doesn’t deserve your praise as much as nana????
i actually feel like, among the dreamies, jeno is the least confident one when it comes to his performance
he knows he’s not an awful rapper or anything but i think it can be a bit too much, being around such bright and huge presences like the others while his nickname literally means “no fun”
his members are just so loud and full of energy most of the time
and sometimes he just really needs to be quiet and observe in silence 
(yes i do know he’s chaotic and a crackhead, i’m just saying as we know he can be a bit introspective)
so what if you just
stopped seeing him?
did he become invisible to you?
did you finally fall for jaemin’s beautiful smile and stupid pick-up lines?
he’s not gonna let it show that he’s affected, though
earth signs are nearly always the ones to “stay strong” because we have this image that people are relying on us???
so we do what we do
bottle everything up and overwork ourselves bc we only got two modes
1. chill, super balanced and down to earth (ay for the pun)
2. please make us take a break we’re literally about to cry if we work for one more minute but we can’t allow ourselves to fucking take it easy
so yes you’ve guessed correctly, we’re going with 2
jeno is going to go so, SO hard on everything he does 
literally every single activity you can think of from dance practice to photoshoots to cooking for the dreamies
he stays up later than usual to get that one tricky move in the choreo just right
he works out more because he thinks he has to look absolutely perfect for when they shoot the mv
jisung asked for ramen? he’s making it but you bet your ass he’s spending over 40 minutes just chopping so
many
vegetables
AND STUFF THAT JISUNG WON’T EVEN EAT
but he’s doing it anyway for the reason being that it just has to be the Best™
and it’s not like he’s competing with anyone else to be diligent
this is just about being better than he was and showing himself—and maybe you—how painstakingly hardworking and driven he can be
maybe then you’re gonna acknowledge him as much as you acknowledge nana :((
:(((((
writing this is making me downright sad, jeno is so underrated and unaware of his power UGH
and i need to point out this is NOT about making you change your bias from jaemin to him, this is solely about having you recognize his efforts, even if you already do
if you just thought jeno was like going off in work because it was asked of him to, jaemin would DEF notice and talk to you about it
turns out it’s a habit of jeno to go extra hard sometimes and he needs someone to make him take a break
so it goes down like you breaking into the practice room when jeno and jisung were practising
the first reaction is confusion
the second is oh hey babe how are you
third is
a-are you dragging jeno and his bag out of the door while screeching at jisung to order pizza and doughnuts for everyone??
yes you are and i’m proud of you
so jeno is still confused and making those cute “hUh” noises he does omg i love him so much
and you’re just rambling about how much of an amazing artist he is, and you love his voice, and he’s a fantastic dancer, and his expressions and gestures are on point, and he takes such good care of the dreamies and
he’s perfect
and he knows jaemin must have talked to you, and he feels so vulnerable to have you know how on edge he’s been
baby boy just needs some rest
and that’s exactly what you give him, with a bath full of those fancy bath bombs and flower petals and candles at your house/apt
then a quick sheet mask while you massage his shoulders and keep saying how much you genuinely admire him
the mask might be ruined cus he started crying out of exhaustion
after that’s been done and you’ve hugged for at least like 5 min nonstop, you head over to the dorms, where hyuck was in charge of setting up a blanket fort while mork and nana gather board games, jisung gets the food and chenle
well chenle just had to make sure jisung doesn’t forget to order for someone and doesn’t break like 10 plates trying to set the table lol
this is way longer than the others so imma wrap it up
make it obvious and loud that you see and respect jeno’s hard work and he’ll be alright again
and maybe make those game nights a weekly thing when possible, it would make him very happy
he’ll never again feel sad when you praise jaemin cus now he’s sure he does enough, and above all, he is enough
Haechan
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haechan = full sun
why would you ever bias someone when you’re dating the goddamned sun
does not understand
but also does not care that much
actually, one out of two really depending on who your bias is
if it’s one of the members he has that tom/jerry relationship with, prepare for so
much
complaining
and clinging
AND HE’D BE SO LOUD OH MY FUCKING GOD
donghyuck please stop screaming about doyoung not deserving to be your baby’s bias, it’s 2 am
on the other hand, if it’s one of the (few) members he,,,
adores with all of his heart and is not afraid to show it
ex: sungchan, jaehyun, taeil and yang2x
then you can bet he’s going to be right beside you whenever you feel like throwing a fit because he’s just so handsome and talented
IF IT’S MARK OSHDISJD
i’m going to write you as being mark biased ok? ok
i honestly don’t know if he’d feel more jealous of mark or of you
he loves you both
a lot,,,,
and he really doesn’t like it when mark blushes when you compliment him
and he doesn’t like it when mark literally just walks past you and you trip over your feet because bro tf u doing, that’s some embarrassing shit
lowkey done with you two
but also PAY HIM SOME ATTENTION
or don’t, he’s fine either way (cue crossed arms and staring at you from across the room until you come give him a kiss)
“he’s pretty cute but i’m cuter right baby”
pouty pouty pouty if he ever feels neglected
will be so fucking annoying lmao i can’t write haechan, i love him but i do understand why renjun is always trying to beat him up
he’d be a show-off in a different way than mark because he can be so petty
will take every chance he gets to pull a one-liner
will sing everything he has to say just so you know he can hit those high notes
what do you mean dream doesn’t have a schedule today
oh man, he could swear they did
because that is the sole reason why he’s wearing his most expensive clothes and shoes + makeup to walk around the dorms, yes
no he doesn’t want to impress you
shut up
will text you like every single fancam he sees on twitter
every
single 
one
and are they mark’s?
lol no, they’re his
he is so genuinely trying to make you a member of his sunflower cult 
<whispers> “tell me i’m your bias” 
“donghyuck what the actual hell why are you standing at the end of my bed in the middle of the night like a fucking demon child”
he really wants to act all cool and composed but he wants to be your bias so fucking bad
he’s a bad bitch all around and just does whatever
cus haechan privilege
and he tends to not care about what people say and think???
bc he knows he’s lee donghyuck
he’s fully aware of the effect he has on people
but you
not biasing him
naw, he can’t take it
will do anything and everything he can to make you say, JUST ONE TIME, he’s your bias
then you can go back to loving (his) mark
so for your sake, for his sake, for mark’s sake
just give donghyuck what he wants
i can promise he’ll keep being an ass no matter what you do
like yeah did you just buy him coffee and his favourite cake? well that’s sweet but iS HE YOUR BIAS YET
“aw babe thanks so much for taking a bullet for me but now please say i’m your bias”
if you still don’t do it, it’s time to be extra petty
will actually drop you for mark
his logic is something like: he can’t be your bias? pity, so he’s just gonna date him instead
and mark is mark so he has no idea what’s going on
everyone in 127 and dream finds this absolutely hilarious cus suddenly donghyuck seems to be doing his best to win over mark’s heart and i mean more than usual???? and he’s treating you like his bro????
<you leaving the dorms to go to uni or smth so you go to hyuck for a goodbye kiss> “no can do, i’m committed”
“i’m your partner”
“no that’s mark”
it’s not 100% a joke when i say i can see him getting down in one knee to propose to mark while making eye contact with you to
assert his dominance
and mark is just
“dude
what HAHAHA”
and you are so done, i’m so sorry you have to go through that bby
i don’t think there’s another way to fix haechan other than just admitting he was your bias for an era, or a comeback or something
like yeah with the other dreamies before him it’s bonding + healing time bc i wrote it all kinda angsty (lol sorry) but with donghyuck
no
“will you stop this if i say you were my bias during reload era”
“mark wasn’t in dream that era tho”
“yes i know”
i say he’s gonna take what he can get and now things can finally go back to normal
with the exception that something else comes along with hyuck being satisfied with you biasing him
he just has a full pass to fanboy over mark now too
what am i talking about?
new 127 mv is out
you: watching it beside haechan and going off about how pretty mark looks
him: going off even harder bc he’s whipped too
this is what a happy couple looks like 
but now i pity mark because he has you two idiots fanboying over him irl
savemork2021
Jaemin
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nana is just such a chill and fun guy
i can’t see him being actually jealous or anything if he finds out you bias someone else
and so the two of you become insufferable together
bitch, i’m telling you
he (ur bias) is not gonna have one peaceful day ever again in his entire life
cus you know the thing jaemin does where he just looks at someone doing some random shit and goes “oOoOoH sExY”
yes that thing
he’s doing it to your bias 
and you’re doing it too
and your bias probably wants to run away to some very far away land
PLEASE IF IT’S JISUNG
i’m not gonna write this whole thing as if you bias him but let’s just imagine
two fully grown people
pilling on top of poor, poor park jisung playing games on his phone
“URI JISUNGIEEEEEE
MWOYA, MWOYAAAA~"
i genuinely think he would avoid being around you two at the same time
cus individually he can handle it
like yes y/n please let me go this hug has lasted for about 4 minutes now
or oh hi jaemin hyung my cheeks hurt when you pinch them that hard
but when you two are together
bruh
a power couple not bc you two are v confident or some shit but bc you can and will be extremely affectionate towards anyone that comes too close
and now let’s talk about how it would be if you biased jaehyun
jaemin loves jaehyun
they’re 2jae
2jae are soulmates
therefore,,,, it’s also kinda hellish but in a different way???
bc 2jae are on the end of that spectrum about the neos that know how in love the entire world is with them
they’re too powerful
they’re aware of their charm and they do everything they can to rub it in our faces
so the flirting between 2jae and you would be insane
and i mean insane
insane as in even johnny is kinda disgusted tbh bc
they’re doing a photo shoot with the 23 of them for some shit, idk don’t ask me
and of course, you had to tag along
but oh my god you three, please stop calling each other sexy/hot in weird voices now, the staff is staring
there are def rumours the 3 of you are a poly couple lmao
jaehyun denies everything on social media (throwback to saying “no way lol” when we asked if he REALLY slept in the same bed as jungwoo)
but every piece of content there is of you and jaemin or you and jaehyun or just them is so ridiculously flirty
you can bet there are compilations on youtube like 
“y/n being in love with 2jae for 8 minutes heterosexual”
ok i was having way too much fun with that, moving on
i don’t think he’d ever be actually upset about you biasing someone else
he trusts you and treasures you a lot so he doesn’t see the problem in you also appreciating another one of his members
bc gods know he does
he’s a bit in love with everyone so why shouldn’t you be too lol
one time he would feel a bit blue because of it???
hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm
i think it’s possible he’d turn pouty or whiny or just kinda needy (not in a bad way, he just misses you) when he’s like
done with people
and needs some time away from everything
we know he’s an introvert, even if he acts very, very loud around the boys and it’s honestly just a matter of time until an introvert grows tired of being around humans
it depends on each person, of course, but there’s a 99% chance every once in a while he’ll start to feel too drained
and he’ll need a break to get his energy back
jaemin would probably want you around even when he feels like that, though
i see you being such a big source of comfort for him in a relationship
he enjoys taking care of people so please take care of him too
and for just this one day don’t talk about your bias that much, or don’t leave nana to go over to him to chat
and just cuddle him a lot
that will make him a smiley baby again
and then things are back to how they normally are
and by that i mean most neos hiding from you because they’re scared 
i don’t have a lot to say aside from that so let’s think about the neos that would be the most intimidated by your shared thot aura
dotae would be confused in different ways lol
taeyong would be just ????????????blush/awkward smile/hahaha??????
and doyoung might actually ask what is wrong with you
<points to jeno and his s/o> “why can’t you be like them”
mark would laugh-scream and slap his knee into oblivion whenever you two are cornering him
but then go super shy and be like “dUDE DON’T DO THAT”
resident confident gay jungwoo would rejoice in the attention and make so many goddamned jokes
a literal comedian i love him
i think sicheng and renjun would be on the same wavelength of repugnance towards you lol
chenle would deadass call you weird and tell you to leave him alone
shotaro and kun might faint (or kun will panic-scold you)
taeil is as confused by affection as usual (have you seen the face he makes when haechan kisses him LMFAO he’s smiling but like wondering wtf happened on the inside)
ten is not very amused but might play into it
yangyang: that’s disgusting, man (cue flashbacks to that live with renjun after the from home stage where renjun pretended to lick his hand and slick his hair back,,, catboy injun,,, you know the one)
xiaojun and hendery are such panicked gays they just turn to stare at whoever else is around and make that “help” expression like they’re on the office
haechan is haechan, kinda doesn’t mind it
jeno is used to dealing with this at this point
lucas and yuta love the attention but while yuta will flirt right back lucas is just gonna smile and try to jop his way out of there while screaming
sungchan will go hide behind haechan and say “hyung they’re being dumbasses again”
this turned into ‘how would nct react to you and jaemin being super flirty together’ and i’m not sorry
Chenle
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chenle is so fun to write i love him lmao
okay so
he doesn’t strike me as the possessive type with anyone other than jisung (bc i swear he can be a bit jelly towards his bestie but i think it comes with sungie being the sweetest bean ever, he’s just protective)
he’s such a ray of sunshine and witty jokes and dolphin laughter i love him
back to the plot
he literally couldn’t care less about you biasing someone else
b u t
i will say there’s an exception
this exception is tall, kinda lanky, very awkward and born on the 5th of february
you’ve guessed it, it’s jisung
i think most of the time he’d tease THE SHIT out of you for it because c’mon
you had 22 chances not to mess up
and you still somehow ended up biasing jisung? lol do better next time
and this is not me and chenle hating on jisung, please—
he’d just find it funny that your bias is his best friend and
hold the fuck up
your bias is his best friend
oH NO NO NO NO NO
i think after realizing that he would lowkey try to keep you two apart because he’s somehow jealous of both????
and if he can’t help it then you can bet your ass he will be screaming all along
it’s his sweet, dummy jisung
with his sweeter and dummier y/n
what is he going to do
probably has a mini-breakdown with kun because like he’s always wanted you two to get along bUT NOT LIKE THAT
kun will just sigh like the tired father he is and pet his back while saying “there, there”
and a genius idea is going to come to chenle’s mind
you know the teasing thing?
well it’s upgrade time
he’s gonna turn into such a try-hard with tmi and embarrassing shit you two have done
and he’s not trying to stop you from being friends
he just wants you to like
know who you’re befriending
bc i think since he’s really really close to jisung, he doesn’t want you getting closer to him bc you like his idol side alone
and he doesn’t want jisung getting close to you just because you’re his partner either
if you had high hopes for each other and ended up kinda falling face-first into the ground bc it was nothing like you had imagined—
he’d be so broken
because he loves you so much :((((
so like, if you can get past the teasing and annoying barrier he’s putting up, he’ll be more than happy to have two of the most important people in his life being buddies
so get ready for it
if you’re the type of person to go batshit crazy when you drink, oh boy, oh boy
so you and the dreamies are just having dinner when lele feels like it’s the perfect time to disclose some of your drunken adventures
“hey y/n”
“yeah babe?”
“remember that time you got really really drunk on vodka and candy and wanted to call your mom”
“chenle the hell don’t talk ab—”
“but then you tried using the microwave as a phone”
“...”
“...”
“or that other time you were equally as drunk and watched the make a wish mv and cried because you noticed the height difference between xiaojun hyung and lucas hyung”
yeah so now’s the part you get up to chase him around the dorms and try to land a kick
BUT WORRY NOT, HE’LL MAKE SURE TO EMBARRASS JISUNG JUST AS MUCH
he likes doing that when it’s just the three of you though
so picture this
movie night the girls boys
chenle would 100% pick the most terrifying horror movie he can find so that he could see jisung clinging to whoever’s closest to him
and then right before a jumpscare, he’d whisper like
“jisung”
“w-what”
“why don’t you do that thing you were doing while you slept last night”
(honestly, i’d be mildly scared if i heard lele say this with no context at all)
and then the jumpscare happens and jisung is nearly fainting and crying at the same time
but chenle is laughing
and trying to get out what he wants to tell you between wheezes
“he-he” <dolphin wheeze> “hE WAS SINGING CHEER UP BY TWICE WHILE SLEEPING” <more wheezes>
and look this is just gonna go on for weeks until you and jisung are over it
and stop being weird and awkward around each other
lele needs you two to be bros ok
so be bros
once you do adapt to being pals with your bias i think chenle would take the teasing down a notch just to make you more comfortable
and like he’s so happy now the three of you can hang out and there’s just no tension
happy chenle is the thing i love the most i swear to gods
and if you don’t adapt to it?
well,,,
i honestly think he’d be pretty disappointed, cus it means to him one of you isn’t ready to fully embrace the weirdness within????
and like what u scared of
jisung is a weirdo, what about it, so are you
either that or he’d think you’re maybe being judgemental
so yeah please accept jisungie and your dumbass boyfriend
then everyone can be besties
i love thinking about the three of you as just this hellbound chaotic trio
because chenji already wreak havoc wherever they go as the two of them
but now that you’re coming along,,,,
no neo would escape from your pranks ever again (and even members of other groups lmfao watch out sehun, i’m talking to you)
and it’s so incredible infuriating in a good way that it just turns to be endearing
you’re cute as fuck so no one gets actually mad with the shit you pull????
which is dangerous, someone should really keep an eye out on the three of you 
we don’t need sm to be on fire
well we kinda do cus they’re pretty bad but not my point
i said somewhere above that chenle would tone the teasing down but i don’t mean he’d stop
bc c’mon guys
he’s chenle
no limits here
but sorry, i really cannot write jealous!chenle cus his heart is just too pure and filled with joy for him to be jealous for real
last scenario?
chenle after a comeback stage: ya y/n, i was gonna ask how was my performance today but you were probably more focused on jisung’s arms right
jisung is choking on water somewhere behind you
Jisung
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it’s maknae time <plays i.n’s maknae on top>
i don’t mean to picture jisung as being like
ridiculously innocent or just downright naive because i really dislike it when people do that
he’s a literal 19 yo and jaemin himself has said he’s not as innocent as we think lol
however
i do see him as being quite new to all things love 
i think you’d probably be his first partner and with first relationships comes a lot of other firsts
first kiss maybe, first time holding hands, first time being jealous….
first time being jealous, yes, focus on that
i don’t think jisung would be aware that like
you not biasing him is even a possibility
cuz you’re dating
doesn’t that come along????
ah poor baby i love him
if you biased chenle i think he’d be just
disgusted and weirded out but okay?? you do you i guess???
he’s comfortable enough with lele to not feel intimidated
but if it’s another member
ESPECIALLY one of the oldest ones
i think it would be a blow straight to his confidence 
you biasing ten, kun, taeil, taeyong, doyoung or johnny and maybe yuta would make him feel a bit hesitant and concerned
his first thought would probably be that you don’t like being with someone as young as him
and who knows, maybe you’re even younger than him, maybe you’re the same age, but what if you actually like older guys??
what about him then???
and jisung doesn’t mean to feel so worried and insecure, ok, pls understand where i’m coming from
first relationships normally take like a very long time to build trust and acceptance of the other person’s feelings bc it’s literally a whole new world for you
and that goes extra hard for jisung because he is so fucking whipped for you it’s still hard to believe you like him as much
and it absolutely does not cross his mind that you’d cheat on him with your bias, GODS NO
he really respects you and his hyungs 
so no, never
that’s not a thing that can happen
but you realize you’re too good for him and maybe see he doesn’t fit your ideal type?
well, yes, that’s what he’s thinking
probably goes straight to chenle or renjun (he talks about renjun so much asjahj) to vent and ask for advice
i think they’d be surprised to see what’s going on inside his pretty little head because it’s so obvious for everyone that you just adore jisung
and they do tell him that
however, i don’t think it would completely calm his nerves, and again, this has nothing to do with not trusting you
it’s just that
his hyungs are so cool…
HE CAN’T HELP IT OK
would probably try to mirror your bias (i’m saying it’s taeyong for the sake of what i’ve imagined ok) and like
grasp onto some of his qualities?
so in his mind taeyong is: nice, sweet, caring, amazing, perfect, smart, perfect, sexy, mature and did i mention perfect
i can see him trying some new rap styles that mimic tyong’s a bit???
like would lowkey learn his raps from cherry bomb and superm’s one and listen to recordings frequently to pick up on how taeyong does it
i think he’d also just change the way he acts in general to dodge a bit from his maknae image
so now he tries to speak with a more formal-ish language and learns random facts about things you like to seem more intelligent???
“good morning y/n, you look as beautiful as one of voiello’s paintings today :]”
“wait i thought that was a pasta brand”
he’s just trying to show you he can be mature and serious if you want him to
long story short, he’s not acting like himself (not that he’s childish, he’s just out of it) and you don’t like it, so you ask about it and wait for him to feel comfortable with sharing
when he does talk about it breaks your heart so much :((
you’re going to need some patience to try and show him you’d choose him, and not your bias, even if you had the chance
they’re completely different people and you love him BECAUSE he’s jisung, not for any other reason
please reassure him so he can go back to acting like his authentic self, i think it would be such a relief for him too
your words and affection are obviously enough for him, but if it ever happens that he feels especially low and insecure again, it would help if your bias talks to him too
and taeyong wouldn’t have a problem with it
actually, scratch that, taeyong probably knew what was going on all along
he just has that motherly 7th sense (ay) that is even more acute with the dreamies cus like 
127 has him, wayv has kun, but dream has…
the dreamies
and that, my friend, is terrifying
anyway he’d come to talk to jisung asking like “what’s wrong buddy :(“ and sungie would be a bit ashamed because it sounds so silly when you say it out loud
of course tyong wouldn’t judge him, and he just really has to tell jisung what is it you and he are always talking about
it’s him
“when they come around to talk and hang out here it all goes back to you, jisungie. they can’t spend one second without mentioning your name
it’s so cute; it’s always like ‘oh jisung would love this’ or ‘jisung likes it that way’
so please be kinder to yourself and let yourself see that they’re in love with you, not with me and not with any other member they ever mention”
jisung would feel 10000000% better
and smiley
and giggly
and oh my god do you really talk about him that much
LOOK HE’S BLUSHING
would just go over to your house immediately and hug you, burying his face on your neck from behind you
and not let go
ever again
the whole situation just teaches him a lot about accepting your love for him and not questioning it 
shut up i’m not crying
---
final notes: this was my first work after the humanity series and it was so fun lol i think next up is probs gonna be an ideal type scenario for ot23 (but if i really write it i’m gonna post it by subunit and its gonna be way shorter than this, don’t expect 23K words at once lmao)
if you’ve enjoyed this fic please consider reading my humanity series, which is a zombie apocalypse au with kun <3
331 notes · View notes
worstloki · 3 years
Text
Top Forty Thor-Being-Thor Moments from Thor 1
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just absolute dumb*ssery that this 7yr old kid’s life goal is to “hunt down the monsters and slay them all”. I’ll go easy on him here and let the Thor/Loki expressions do the talking because of “...just like you did Father” but seriously can his hands even fit around a sword handle??? this kid isn’t even punching the air right??? if there was a sword in his hand he would’ve cut his head with the way he’s moving???? pure tiny-himbo energy here just look at that >:o face he’s making. contrasts very nicely with Loki’s ‘,:|. 10/10. such a baby idiot.
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“the jotuns must pay for what they have done! they broke into the weapons vault! if the frost giants had stolen even one of these relics!” thor. thor please. can you even name one of these relics. thor. hey thor. thor. shut up. “well, what would you do about this?” odin asks him. “march into jotunheim! like you once did! break their spirits! so they’ll never try anything like this again!” wow okay so we’ve fast-forwarded by like a thousand years and thor is still going on about genocide. huh. that’s funny, i thought loki was the genocidal one. hmm. i also just realized that the loki exclusive clip gives loki the same hairstyle thor has here so do what you will with that information.
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0/10. horrible. terrible. i dont care how angy thor is about not getting to kill some jotuns or become king today this very instant, that is a tremendous waste of food. an absolute fool. how can he just remorselessly throw the bread to the floor. if loki stabbed him when he was 7 he would deserve it for this table flip alone. what a privileged white *ssh*le.
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loki came skulking around a corner and suggested not to go to jotunheim and not only did thor not suspect anything but he also then went on to decide to go to jotunheim. 10/10 himbo material. 
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if tumblr didn’t have a picture limit i would put every instance of thor smiling in this list because look at that stupid smile. he’s such an idiot. 11/10. this is the thor content i’m here for.
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“I have no plans to die today” thor says with the stupidest open-mouthed smirking smile ever captured on film. right after he also told heimdall not to tell anyone they’re gone. he’s literally planned to strand them on jotunheim. thor’s grand plan was to strange themselves on jotunheim and also start a fight. i repeat: thor’s plan was to successfully slay all the frost giants and not need to return until they’re all gone. what an absolute d*mb*ss. this is getting ridiculous. this was originally a top-ten-thor moments list but i’m not even twenty minutes in so i’ll have to extend the list. thor. thor are you listening? thor, you’re such an idiot.
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“HOW DID YOUR PEOPLE GET INTO ASGARD?!” thor you sweet sweet summer idiot, please, i am beggin,g you,, learn to rea,d , a room,, literally everyone else who came with you is regretting it, there is complete silence and only the rumble of the opposing king is meeting your “I AM THOR, SON OF ODIN”s, please, please take some notes from Loki, or, you know, literally anyone else in the room, since everyone is asking you to get out of this realm while you still can,
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thor’s stupid smile makes an appearance after he gets called a princess and decides to fight a whole realm over it. you know what? thor is a princess. he’s the prettiest princess in all the lands. what’s thor gonna do about it? is he going to fight me too? I hope he does the stupid grin first. minus 15 points for the sexism. thor is a complete and utter sadistic fool who needs to get a hobby. seriously, he’s 1500 years old and still going on and on about slaying all the frost giants. boi, i hate to break it to you, but your dad is not the best or only example of greatness out there. i don’t think your dad even qualifies as an example of that. 
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“THEN. GO!” 🥰 ahh yes, just thor thingz 🥰🥰 like when one friend has had his arm burnt 🥰 and another friend has been impaled and needs medical attention, 🥰🥰 and all the rest of your friends are yelling for you, 🥰 and your brother is telling you they must go, 🥰 and you decide to buy everyone time by laughing maniacally and killing more frosties because you care for them and dont find joy in destruction like a loon 🥰🥰🥰 
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THIS is the iconic Thor moment that makes my day whenever I think about it. Just Thor, an absolute bumbering 6′6′’ giant boodlusting dummy sees Odin and just decides to yell “FATHAA!! WE’LL FINISH THEM TOGETHAAA!” as if the last thing Odin told him wasn’t “no, thor, we’re not going to do anything to the frost giants, do not go after them and try to kill them all.” 11/10 d*mb*assery right here folks, I couldn’t ask for Thor to be more of a fool. This is PEAK Thor energy. Look at that face. I feel like Thor spends half this movie with his nostrils flared. I love it.
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okay i gotta give thor credit for rightfully calling odin “an old man and a fool” but also there was not even 1 frame of the scene where Thor had a decent face so now all i see is >:O >:| >:o >:[ when i watch that scene. yelling at odin was great, not yelling at odin after he HUAERGHed at loki was less great, but to be fair it’s thor and he is the definition of Peak D*mb*ss. 
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thor literally GROWLS and starts yelling “HAMMAA?? HAMMER??” over and over. He was hit by a van, he fainted, he woke up and started growling. I don’t know what else there is to say about this.
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“you dare threaten me? puny human?”. so. uhh. basically. Thor knew she was threatening him? He KNEW she had a weapon? instead he made a face and started yelling as he tried to walk his way closer????? thor you complete and utter dum dum. you frickin hairball-for-brains. im not even surprised darcy tasered him. with that kind of face, i’d taser him too.
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when you wake up in an unknown place to a person smiling at you without a stupid smile, the first step is always to attack first and ask questions later 😌😌😌 (but seriously thor you imbecile why didn’t you ask where you were instead of throwing multiple people around the room and getting your butt needled. you clueless buffoon. you’ll remain a clueless buffoon if you don’t listen to anyone.)
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just a quick recap but thor was knocked unconscious by a van and these people kidnapped him aboard and the next scene we see him in he’s checking himself out in  mirror after presumably changing right there in the open?????? these are the things that make thor thor. any other character and i’d question it so much, but this is thor, and i truly believe this is in-character for him. just change in the open because why not? thor is a beefcake and that’s his only redeeming quality and he knows it. 10/10 thor moment. 
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I am now convinced that Thor saw Jane and “5k van-hitter to lover slow-burn height-difference himbo-scientist trope” flashed through his mind.
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“but no more smashing!” Jane says, and then Thor proceeds to check her out and smile unlike an idiot and like a douche. was this his version of flirting???? i’m not one to decide, but yes, yes it was. He threw a cup to the ground and broke it, and she’s getting mad at him and berating him about it, and he’s liking it. y’all i’m sorry to break it to you like this, but thor has a canon fetish. i am so, so sorry.
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im DYING. THAT ISN’T EVEN A KISS, HIS MOUTH IS OPEN. he SMUSHES his mouth around her knuckle???? WHY. I can’t keep noticing things like this. send help. please. Jane’s response makes so much more sense now; she’s laughs for a solid 3 seconds and shakes her head and is like “uhh, thank you? ahaha,” and then she keeps looking back longingly when walking away. they are doing this in PLAIN sight of EVERYONE. Darcy and Erik are standing RIGHT THERE, and Thor is doing weird things to her with his mouth. I’m out. I am done here. goodbye. 
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return of the stupid smile AND the douche smile in quick succession through the entire trip. their entire dialogue is peppered with innuendo. “I’ve never done anything like this before. have you ever done anything like this before?” “many times, but you are brave to do it.” “I have nothing else to lose.” “ah but you are clever, far more clever than anyone else on this realm.” “realm? rEaLm?” “you think me strange?” “yes” “good strange or bad strange?” “I haven’t decided yet.” I AM DYING OVER THIS. plus, we get Return Of The Himbo with Jane asking after Einstein Rosen bridges and Thor is like “uh, actually, more like a rainbow bridge 😜🤪” i feel so sorry for jane here, didn’t know how much of a d*mb*ss Thor was when signing up for this van-trip and knuckle-sucking 😭😭😭 i also no longer have questions about how the trip that SHOULD HAVE BEEN A HALF-HOUR ONE turned into one that LASTED TILL THE SUN WENT FROM THE MIDDLE OF THE SKY TO SETTING by the time they arrived. I have no questions. please. I don’t want to know what they were doing in that van. please no. don’t make me think about it.
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thor’s plan had 3 steps and they were 1. give jane his jacket 2. walk in and get his hammer 3. fly out. that was literally his plan. he had the first “I have a plan. attack.” moment in the MCU. pure concentrated 0-brain-cells energy right here. how can you not stan this king of d*mb*ssery. look at him, flaunting his big boy muscles. he’s about get his hammer and fly out, like he just told jane with a trademark stupid-smile.
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crop-top hair-mop thor is my favourite thor. the way the entire fight scene parallels a hamster in a maze only exemplifies the thor vibes for some inexplicable reason.
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“you’re big. fought bigger.” + Thor douche-smile + subtext from earlier + rolling around passionately in the mud = not a happy me. 
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I swear i’m not making up this romantic subtext but it’s barely even subtext. the entire scene leading up to Thor’s attempt at lifting the hammer is actually filmed erotically. I’m not kidding. First there’s a shot where Thor pulls aside a hamster-cage-wall blind which mirrors a shower-curtain, and THEN he walks around the hammer while smiling douche-ly at it, we get a few close-ups to his face which are shot from angles slightly lower than himself, giving him an aire of superiority, plus the music adds to this, he reaches out for the hammer’s handle with a mud-covered arm in the rain, in non-slow-motion slow-motion, and he wraps his arm around it, like, he fully twists his arm, unecessarily sexually, around it as he grabs the hammer. This is not okay. On the plus side, it makes the movie much more entertaining,, on the down side,,.
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im not going to call Thor dumb for not knowing he’s not worthy. im not going to. because odin literally whispered the enchantment to mjolnir after he’d thrown thor to midgard. it is very funny watching thor grunt in frustration though. he starts yelling because he couldn’t lift the hammer and just lets himself get caught. like, dude, get a life, go buy a new weapon from the store, seriously. he mourns for the hammer on-screen longer than he does for loki. he also looks like he’s in far more pain here. he becomes catatonic and unresponsive after this, but when loki dies he’s already feasting the same afternoon. 10/10 dum dum thor material. never change thor, never change. (that’s code for please change, thor, please,)
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thor trying to establish dominance wherever he goes is the funniest thing because at this point he’s being a complete asgardian *ss about it and it’s reaching points of pettiness never seen before. side note: he is possibly flirting with selvig too. maybe. i’m not saying anything happened, but Thor’s openning lines when bringing him home carried over his shoulder are “he’s fine, not injured at all,” followed with an apology to selvig, and an explanation to jane which consisted only of “we drank, we fought, he made his ancestors proud,” and then he puts the man to bed and before he falls asleep erik says “i still don’t believe you’re the g*d of th*nder, but you ought to be,” so... your choice, i guess...
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thor’s got his trademark stupid smile and stupidly takes jane’s life’s work notebook and starts doodling in it about trees. the last time his father told him this story about Yggdrasil was when he was 5 and he clearly hasn’t payed attention to any lesson about anything since and it shows so so much. thank you thor. very insightful knowledge you’re passing on hear. ‘i come from a world where [science and magic] are one and the same,’ ok great, now elaborate on that please. oh, right, you can’t because you’re thor, my bad, 20/10 thor behaviour. he couldn’t even doodle nicely. all his lines are wobbly. epic art fail. i wouldn’t trust him near my sketchbook with a 2B pencil.
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THIS is thor’s realization face. in case anyone was interested in what ‘dawning truth’ looked like on him. 😰😪 THIS is the face of a thinker, of a man betrayed by his own beloved brother for unprecedented reasons. look at the nuance in his expression. 😩😩😩 so many emotions, I can’t even count them all 😩💯😪
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stupid smile and “do not worry my friends, i have a plan,” he says, “i’ll just try and abuse the fact that Loki’s super selfless and kind and has no self worth to my benefit as i have countless times before which is exactly what he’s rightfully angry about this time,” he doesn’t think to himself because that is NOT the smile of someone who is thinking... like, at all. +10000 points to gryffinthor. the d*mb*ssery really jumps out.
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“im sorry bro for whatever i did and whatever you’re blaming me for as an excuse to do this, im sorry bro, but you’re disturbing innocents that i don’t really care about but you’re the one making a scene in front of them so why don’t you admit you won’t kill me and are just having a temper tantrum and we move on? hmm?” and then he proceeds to get slam dunked in the face with a metal arm like yEAAAA BOI that’s what you GET for going up against the SENTIENT LAVA-SPEWING metal-man ya absolute dunderhead clod. thunderhead clod? yeah, that. he’s just so dumb, your honour, please, you must understand, the victim pleads guilty on all charges of d*mb*ss and d*mb*ss alone.
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I can NOT describe the emotions I feel knowing that Thor is suck-kissing Jane’s knuckles. Like, his mouth is literally jelly-ing it up against her hand. There is suction there and it shows when he is placing and removing his mouth. I promise that’s what is happening. I’m not any happier than you about this. I regret everything. This is why Loki should be what is focused on and not Thor; Thor’s going around trying to frick frack everything in sight even if it’s just Jane’s hand. He’s maintaining eye contact with Jane while he licks her fingers. Why did I decide to rewatch this movie. 
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i’m only adding this in as a thor moment because of how desperately and badly they kiss. seriously. 2/10 kiss. im not surprised jane broke up with him. they look like two actual seals fighting over an actual grape. while i’m here i’m going to criticize every fic ever that decided thor is an experienced gentle lover. what were y’all on when watching this movie. thor can and will f*ck literally everything in sight and he won’t even do it well because he is the peakest of peak d*m d*m. look at this man. look at his face. that is the face of an absolute himbo idiot, and it’s the face of an absolute himbo idiot who knows it. he’s been stranded on earth for 2 days, max, and his flirt-count is at 69 people because his name is one letter away from thot. i bet his terrible use of a pen from early means he writes his ‘r’s like ‘t’s and he doesn’t even care. 1000/10 thor moment. doesn’t get much more romance-thor than two individuals smooshing their faces together after some finger sucking. that finger sucking is gonna leave jane simping for years. and that’s true love babey. <3
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“I’ll handle my Brother!” Thor says, as if Loki didn’t send a metal-murder-bot that quite virtually killed him less than ten minutes ago asdfhkhsdgsdjf Thor, you horrific himbo you, Loki’s weapon of choice is literally throwing knives he will literally kill you before you enter the room if he’s on his game and wants you dead which he just proved he would do and you’re just gonna???????????? jog on over to him????? Thor??????????? bruH???????????? buddy??????? pal???????? you really wanna go 1v1 the brother you very clearly underestimate and know nothing about????????????????? im loving the confidence, but, no.
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Loki: “you literally can’t stop this from here.” Thor, immediately: “i’m going to hit it with the hammer and see if that works” and then it does in fact work later... technically speaking, even if it ends up causing chaos destruction and death and loki falling off the bifrost 😔😔😔 but Big Brain Thor is the Biggest Brained Thor!!! The plan worked!! in a messy-Thor-ish way, but it did!!!
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“you can’t kill an entire race!!!!” Thor yells, teeth gritted, as he faces his brother, his coward pacifist brother, who has suddenly decided he wants to join the age-old family tradition of realm-destroying, when this is supposed to be Thor’s dream, Thor’s, not Loki’s. How dare he, Thor thinks to himself, fist clenched around Mjolnir in anger, the pain of the handle pressing against his palm perhaps the only thing preventing him from lashing out at this thought, that’s my planet of monsters to slay, he should go get his own! Loki hits Thor across the face with the back-end of his spear. “Now fight me,” Loki says, but Thor, well, Thor cannot fight, as he remains stunned that of all things Loki would dare steal his life’s ambition, and he is sent sprawling backwards across the observatory, slowly but surely sliding to a stop despite his catatonic, very symbolic silence.
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the elegance, the poise, i see your time on earth has made you no less graceful, Thor. the simple magnitude of this sprawl. the spread of the arms. the turn of the feet. this is not a dude, this is a man.
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sometimes your brother starts vehemently talking about he’s gonna kill the race of monsters and about how he’s only ever wanted to be your equal and about how he’s not your brother and never was and sometimes you just have to say “this is madness” instead of addressing the issues or asking for any of the  deets 🔥 👊💯😩
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Loki is whipping Thor’s butt. Both literally, and metaphorically, Loki is whooping Thor’s d*mb*ss. Earlier he knicked Thor’s face, now he’s just pushing Thor around, he uses the spear as a pole and later kicks Thor’s face by kicking vertically up, and Thor, bless him in all his blond golden muscled glory, doesn’t think anything is up with this, gosh he’s such an absolute utter idiot
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sometimes your brother laughs way too much and also cries too much in a fight and there are also too many of him so you just need to blast lightning so you get a shot at all of them 😌😌😌 and then put your magical infinitely-heavy hammer on his chest 😌😌😌 but it’s okay because Thor left holes in Loki’s container 😌😌😌
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now THIS is the meat to Thor’s funny bone, just the pure unadulterated humour that is Thor saying that there will never be a “wiser king” or a “better father” than Odin, it cracks me up every single time without fail, just the way he says it with a straight face and— what do you mean he wasn’t joking
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look at Thor’s stupid smile as he asks Heimdall to spy on jane every single day while conveniently never asking after Loki ever. This is Thor’s face in mourning after he attended a feast after everyone was celebrating after Loki’s death. Look at his stupid smile. I love him your honour. He’s just,, he’s just so frickin stewpeed, just Thor being Thor, just the purest of d*mbest of *sses. 
410 notes · View notes
dreamii-yume · 3 years
Text
SPOILERSSS for Twisted Wonderland Chapter 6 : 1-16!!!
*rubs hands* aight it wont take long before genshin has me in its gacha hell grasp again, I just barely escaped this time— NOW ITS TIME TO SEE THE BOIS CHAPTER 6 omg— wtf happened last time lol it’s been too long
So, no voice over because of some problems which is understandable but— meh I don’t feel like reading lol So I’m watching otome ayui translations this time, because im that one dumbass student who skipped kanji class and now i cant read without sounding like im five _:(´ཀ`」 ∠): “what up im yume im way passed 19 and i never fucking learned how to read”
Also watching Hanayura Kanon stream for the rest that’s not yet been translated lol Because he’s very good at voice acting for the characters and he’s funny af lol
- OKAY OKAY— WTF HAPPENED EXPLAIN
- Fun fact : I haven’t watched Hercules yet so I legit don’t know what’s about to come lol
- Aw, that’s cute— We called over Ace and Deuce late at night AND THEY REALLY CAME OVER AAAAA
- I forgot how fckin pure their friendship is _:(´ཀ`」 ∠):
- Aight, so we actually have a huge-ass scratch from feral Grim lol That’s just fantastic, isn’t it
- FINALLY— We’re talking about Mickey and the stones my monster cat has been eating with Crowley AAAAA
- “Yeah there’s this bitch called mickey and i took his photo—“
- WE’RE FINALLY TALKING ABOUT THIS. AFTER 6 CHAPTERS.
- Bruh this crystal of blot sounds really dangerous why are we discussing this just now
- Speaking of this crystal, Crowley— you were looking for this crystal in chap one and when we asked you about wtf you’re trying to find you just went— “oH itS NothING.”
- I SUPPOSED ITS NOT NOTHING NOW IS IT
- I didnt see you searching for crystals after every chapter mr. crowley where were you 👁👄👁 dont you think it was weird that you didnt see a single one after like— five blotting incidents
- Oh so its rare i see— BRUH R U SURE ABOUT THAT grim literally found one every single chap LMAO
- Okay okay— see, he may be violent but listen— you aint gonna throw out my fucking cat okay
- Wh— THERE WAS A FESTIVAL!? Im dumb so its not just VDC LOL
- Listen LISTEN— GRIM IS FINE. HOLD UP— NO NEED TO THROW HIM OUT JUST LET ME HAVE ANOTHER LOOK AT HIM
- Aww, Ace and Deuce looked pissed about it too AAAAHH THE TRUE DEFINITION OF THE BOIS
- BRUH NO— ALL THE DORM LEADERS TO GO AND CAPTURE GRIM?? HE’LL DIE
- CROWLEY PLS— WE CAN TALK ABOUT THIS, HONEY
- #Grimportectionsquad
- “It’s bout time for them to come” Who?
- FUCKING— CROWLEY STOP SAYING ITS NOTHING— This is why this school is so fucked, you never tell us anything ahead of time _:(´ཀ`」 ∠):
- Aight he left, Ace Deuce hurry help me what you guys got
- He may be a monster but see— the worst he did is eat the whole tuna stack SO PLS HES STILL BABY AND I LOVE HIM
- THATS RIGHT DEUCE MY MAN GRIM CAN DO NO BAD I SWEAR
- HE WOULDNT EVER AGAIN I SWEAR
- Ace ヽ(;▽;)ノ The character development— im so proud of you, son
- THIS IS THE BOISSS— LETS GOOOO
- Fuck this is so beautiful— just me and the bois on our way in the middle of the night to find our MISSING CAT I—
- CROWLEY REALLY DID ASSEMBLE THEM DORM LEADERS AAAAAAA AT THIS HOUR TOO WTF
- BRUH WE CAN TALK
- Kalim Kalim Kalim Vil Vil Vil— Pls we’ve been through so much last chapter HELP
- Leona…A big fat mood honestly lmao
- Ey ey riddle pls— dont make this any more difficult—
- Shut up azul stay where u are all you’ve done is nothing but chaos since you arrive so SHHH
- MALLEUS IS NOT HERE AGAIN LILIA PLS— where is he when we need him the most LOL
- Ortho, your bro where?? Also— SURVIVAL STATUS BRUH—
- YES PLS DONT HURT HIM OMG
- oh i forgot idia lives in his tablet LOL OF COURSE
- Omg he’s in the apple trees still looking scary as shi aaaaaaa pls kitty come home u just had too much catnip
- OH GOD 15m HE’S CLOSE
- “Starting operation” ORTHO WHAT TF
- EY EY EY oh good he’s knocked out sighhh
- Aight I know this has been translated but I can’t help but to look at the original japanese and im just— wtf is RTS and TAS idia i dont understand this advanced gamer otaku language
- But Idia and Ortho really do be speedrunning on who can fucking kick my cat the hardest LOL
- THATS RIGHT IDIA You understand me— Fellow cat lovers unite, Grim is very cute, he can’t do no bad
- …so can i have him back pls—
- Can we just appreciate the fact that these bois are willing to take the risk of getting their heads chopped off by Riddle by doing all this for us??
- If this isnt what you call true friendship then i dont know what this is
- Lol ambrose is going to appear in this festival again and crowley’s prideful ass is QUAKING
- WHY are we not allowed to see him crowley im sure we can handle it— We’re the BOIS. CMON
- Imagine if they just summon a fcuking— magic vet or something lol
- It’s the next day lol
- HAH ITS THE VDC LOSERS BY ONE VOTE SQUAD
- I mean the NRC Tribe— ٩( ᐛ )و
- VIL. what you have my queen
- Vil pls dont remind me that my cat isnt here but thank you for saying thank you i do not deserve—
- AWW THE ADEUCE SQUAD LOOKS SO SAD AAAAA
- Vil i miss the bad bitch but absolute oneesan energy but the apology— yeah are we gonna cry again lol
- AAAAAAHH why am i so proud— THAT vil is apologizing
- You dont need to maam what we had in chapter 5 was a fucking journey i regret nothing
- I swear if rook goes like— bitch that aint beautiful imma bonk him I WILL DO IT dont think i forgot what u did last chap
- Man i love me a man who can openly admit his mistakes MMMGH
- Rook i swear—
- Im glad that we’re not toning down ace’s brutal honesty lol
- BRUHHH I DONT LIKE IT WHEN VIL US TAKING ALL THE BLAME i mean what he said was kinda true BUT STILL
- Cheer up Vil, it’s not like it’s a complete failure anyways (;ω;) it was fun at least
- Hearing Jamil encourage Vil like this feels surreal BUT YES BOI U TELL EM
- What is this beautiful character development
- Ooff way to hit where it hurts the most vil my queen lol
- AAGH IT HURTS VIL RECOGNIZING NEIGE’S HARDWORK LIKE THIS— THE PRIDE I CAN FEEL IT CRACK
- Bruh we appreciate Neige’s impeccable smile in this household— REMEMBER WHEN EVERYONE WAS LIKE NEIGE’S GON BE A BAD BOI??? WELP—
- It was me, i was that person and i shall drown in apple juice for it
- Of course, the ultimate Neige simp already knows that lol
- Bruh the background music has no business being this sad stop
- I hate it when vil is right sometimes omg— TRUEEE KALIM especially wouldn’t be able to stand properly on stage after knowing Neige’s own hardships aaaa
- NOO BABY DONT CRY
- Vil redemption arc??? 👀👀 you can help us cure our cat—
- !? Are we gonna get that money promised in that poster?? 👀👀
- WHAA FUCKING WAHAA VIL IS GONNA PAY THAT US??? THE WHOLE 5 MIL EACH??!! VIL CALM DOWN WHAT I SAID WAS A JOKE
- Damn vil is STACKED He really didnt want to owe anyone anything LMAO YES QUEEN
- WHA— KALIM IS ACCEPTING??? OUT OF EVERYONE HERE, I DID NOT EXPECT YOU TO ACCEPT THAT KALIM
- Kalim is making my heart go boom boom again baby boi ✨👁💧👄💧👁✨✨
- HE’LL DONATE IT TO THE RAMSHACKLE DORM BABY BOIIII
- …sumimasen kalim for having a very rundown dorm 👁💧👄💧👁 but thank you for being nice about it lol
- OKAY OKAY KALIM YOU DONT HAVE TO LIST ALL THE THINGS WRONG IN MY DORM PLS—
- THIS IS EMBARRASSING PLS KALIM IM SORRY FOR BEING POOR
- But this man be such a sunshine holy shit i cant even be mad about it lol
- AW YEAH RAMSHACKLE DORM IS GONNA GET A MAKEOVER
- EVERYONE BE DONATING THEIR MONEY TO US AAAAA Were they always this NICE
- Aight adeuce pls— y’all dont have to force yourself to donate my guys (´;ω;`) being friends is enough lol i get it my bois
- Find me a man who can make me feel like this the way Vil can
- Man if only Grim is here :’) he’d be soo happy :’)) you can have all the tuna you want buddy :’)))
- GRIM PLS ADEUCE IS WILLING TO TREAT YOU TO LUNCH BABY
- Bro this is so wholesome omg
- Im sorry but still up to this day, my understanding of Epel’s accent is still lacking lmao
- Aight they be talking about how Rook already knew that they were going to lose from the very beginning
- The FORESHADOWING LOL The difference with how Rook said “What a wonderful performance” rather than “What a beautiful performance” sigh
- Honestly we gotta respect Rook’s resolve here lol man just knows what he wants
- Rook and Vil’s friendship lmao
- 👁👄👁 …!?
- EARTHQUAKE WTF How dare you ruin such moment—
- WHAT IS GOING ON
- EY WTF DONT DESTROY MY DORM WTF ARE YOU GUYS
- WHAT ARE THESE ROBOTS OUTSIDERS KILL THEM WITH FIRE
- They look like something that belongs to the Ignihyde dorm HUH
- Oh bruh— Vil in his Dorm Leader mode is so cool AND YES I KNOW THIS IS NOT THE TIME BUT wheww~~ Vil YAS QUEEN
- KALIM TOO AAAAAA JAMIL’S 「はっ!」SO COOL
- so SO— the dorm leader’s have a protocol for outsider attacks like this 👁👄👁 OMG THEY’RE SO HOT
- They don’t seem like our bois anymore aaa just pure professionalism at this point—
- GOD I FORGOT HOW COOL THEY ARE OMG
- HEEEYYY OUR DORM IS GETTING DESTROYED WTF ARE THESE GUYS’ PROBLEM
- We were just talking about renovating it too wtf
- AAAAAHHH HOW DARE YOU— VIL R YOU OK
- Bruh i dont know what is going on but dont touch my man’s face
- They’re targetting Vil and Jamil WHY— overblot men!!??? WHERE ARE YOU— GIVE THEM BACK
- I didnt understand what epel said here lmao BUT—!?
- THEY HAVE GRIM TOO FUCK HE’S BACK LET GO OF MY FUCKING CAT
- WHAT IS GOING ON DARLINGS
- BUDDYY >:’0000 Grimmm MY HEART—
- Are they kidnapping the overblot men?? What— the fucking absolute balls on these robots
- God we’re getting absolutely fucked in here
- AND THERE’S A CAULDRON IN THE BACKGROUND LOL DEUCE WENT HAM
- BRING ME BACK MY FUCKING CAT— >:’0000
- I thought there’s going to be a festival not a fucking kidnapping event HEY
- Oh 👀 Rook pls help
- AAAHH SERIOUS ROOK IS HOT—
- IS THE OTHER DORM LEADERS CHILLING WHERE ARE THEY KALIM PLS BE SAFE
- OH RIDDLE IS NOT ANSWERING THEY GOT HIM TOO
- Oh ghad they got him during clubs WTF HOW—
- *nervous hornii chuckling* …angry expression silver 👁👄👁 im sorry
- AAAA Dorm leaders actually be acting like dorm leaders is soo cool i cant—
- Bruh the story is all chaos what is this chapter
- Are they gonna get Leona and Azul too what—
- RIDDLE BABY Jesus christ dont overblot like this again lol
- DAMN HE STRONG FOR A SMOL BOI THO
- Whoever made these robots wtf is their deal lol TO BE ABLE TO BEAT A DORM LEADER—
- …Bruh where is our horned friend when u need him
- Silver and Sebek theorizing with dorm leaders but they took Jamil tho?? It’s probably the overblot men they’re after
- Also Malleus is probably good so you two calm down lol Lilia’s probs having tea with him right now
- Okay, Leona how are you going to get captured KING.
- Omg everything is getting destroyed wtf
- AW LEONA SAVED RUGGIE THATS CUTE AND COOL AF
- Bruh leona these are material robots— cant you just turn them into sand lol
- Oh they do have some kind of brand cmon just turn them into sand pls
- WHAT THE FUCK
- LEONA-SAN!? WHY ARE YOU GIVING UP— OJI-TAN!!!
- OLD MAN WHAT—
- *hearing leona whisper his reasons ✋ 👁👄👁 🤚 okay sir im sorry
- Damn Leona acting like a real prince right now— it’s kinda hot 👀👀
- BRUH PLS COME BACK DONT TALK LIKE YOU AINT GONNA
- BRO WHERE ARE THE TEACHERS
- THE BOARD GAME CLUB
- Idia : “bro we just chilling be cool— MY CHESS PIECE“
- “Aight ortho what’s the situation” “fucked"
- So Idia of course knows about this— why does he look like he’s so done lmao me getting the feeling this isnt the first time idia has encountered this situation before lol
- Man i want to see azul in action too but mehh— Idia told him to settle down cries
- LOL WHAT IS THIS KARONE ROBOTS
- Wait— are they taking idia too?? OH IS THIS THE DOING OF IDIA’S FAMILY
- WHERE IS CROWLEY— THE TEACHERS, YOUR IMPORTANT STUDENTS ARE GETTING KIDNAPPED
- AH THEY ALSO KNOW ABOUT THESE STYX BITCHES WHAT— and they’re just letting them GO whaaat
- Sounds to me that this must be idia’s family taking care of the overblotting students?? Like to protect Idia or something?? I DONT—
- “Gather all the dorm leaders” No, sir, they’re already gone besides my sunshine and the horn boi
- Malleus??? 👁👄👁 TSUNOTAROU
- Pls kill the robots they destroyed my place
- AAH UPSIDE DOWN LILIA long time no see lol
- Bruhh the diasomnia students are so lucky to have Malleus as a dorm leader omg
- BRUH LILIA’S RINGTONE IS SO CUTE LMAO
- Kalim sounds so desperate im so sad
- ARE WE— ARE WE GONNA MEET MALLEUS AGAINNN
- Bruh they just goku teleported their way out of the dorm lol
- AAAAHH EVERYONE IS HERE THIS IS SO FUN
- Wait jack is not here lol did they just forget about him wtf
- Oh shit we here too i did not know LMAO
- S-So are we just gonna..continue school like— like these styx bitches didnt just ruin half the school, my dorm, injure my bois, and took my cat or…???
- GASP AAAA STYX IS A BLOT RESEARCH FACILITY WHAAAT
- So that’s why leona and idia be like bro this is not worth it
- O-Oh yeah— they…they didnt know that Vil overblot— PFFT
- Malleus pls information who are you talking about—
- WHO— LILIA MALLEUS OH NO
- Ey, overblot squad are assembled lol this looks so dangerous
- LMAOO Riddle was sleeping on Leona’s lap for three hours THATS SO CUTE
- Where the fck did they take them, ITS CRAMPED AF
- Bro they’re just exposing Vil and Jamil’s overblot that’s supposed to be a SECRET LOL
- Oji-tan can sound so wise and reliable like this if he really tried lol sugar daddy energy
- Wtf these guys never thought that idia was from a big shot family??? They thought it was just coincidence that they had the same family name PFFT
- AZUL AAAA He was right there my guy BUSINESS OPPORTUNITY MAN
- oh. They finally opened— isn’t this the ignihyde dorm what
- WHAT THE FU— IDIA
- Bro— WHAT WAS THAT IT WAS IDIA ALL ALONG???
- WHAT IS THIS CHAPTER
This chapter is a fucking roller coaster like— literal 0 to 100 QUICC From having a moment with Vil and the bois to a FUCKING TERRORIST ATTACK LMAO IM HYPED FOR NEXT CHAP—
It’s been so long, I hope they released the next part soon (๑>◡<๑) I forgot how fine these men are lol at least I want to hear their voices again 👁👄👁
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Text
so exactly 2 (two!) people asked for the playlist, which means i 100% am going to deliver
alright so without any more of my stupid commentary,, here is the bakugou playlist w/ a little bit of explanation bc i just like to talk about him
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Title: *anger noises*
spotify link :)))
1. Love Me Dead - Ludo
lmao basically, about this one, bakugou would. he 10000% would say shit like “you're a parasitic, psycho, filthy creature, finger-bangin' my heart”. that’s all i gotta say about this one
2. Love Bites (So Do I) - Halestorm
look at the title of this song. you gonna tell me that’s not bakugou???
3. Scotty Doesn’t Know - Lustra
distinct blasty boy energy. very much a song i turn up in my car and immeadiately go “yeah- he would crush the dreams of some poor boy and then write a song about it. just to sing his own praises.”
4. Dead! - My Chemical Romance
ummm  “Have you heard the news that you're dead? No one ever had much nice to say, I think they never liked you anyway.” 
-i , sorry for the angst but??? thinkin about bakugou post-kidnapping and kamino ward??? 
5. Modern Swinger - The Pink Spiders
i mean, just the whole chorus rlly. listen to it- bakugou would think that. he would. but esp the line “And its love, It's heavy and it hurts and it's love”
6. Crazy Bitch - Buckcherry
this song is the best misogyny i’ve ever heard. the message is terrible but bakugou would. he would. 
7. Highway Tune - Greta Van Fleet
i- the scREAM/yodel in the beginning of this song?? like “you are my special, you are my special, you are my midnight” , and the “There's one girl that I know I'm never gonna pass” and the “So sweet, So fine, So nice, All mine” , iTS BAKUGOU IT IS, I WILL LITERALLY WRITE AN ESSAY ABOUT IT
8. Witness - Mindless Self Indulgence
“Son of a bitch, god likes me, I am the best, fuck everybody else”
..... i - y’all already kno i aint even gotta explain this one
9. Vicious Love - New Found Glory ft Goddess Hayley Williams
i cannot explain to y’all enough how much this one makes me think about bakugou- PLS ITS ABOUT SEEING SOFTNESS IN OTHER RELATIONSHIPS AND WANTING IT,, BUT STILL ONLY BEING ABLE TO EXPRESS LOVE THRU CONFLICT
10. Uneasy Hearts Weigh The Most - Dance Gavin Dance
no explanation tbh,, the lyrics dont rlly apply but listen to this song n just tRY and tell me it wasn’t on bakugou’s 7th grade playlist
11. Little Monster - Royal Blood
“Heartache to Heartache, I'm your wolf, I'm your man, I say run little monster, Before you know who I am”
yep yep checks out thats bakugou isnt it
12. Run - Foo Fighters
“In another perfect life, in another perfect light, we run” and “Wake up, run for you life with me”
basically its about escaping a world in ruins with someone u love by ur side,,,,, every day i think about writing a bakugou fic with this premise but i havent done it yet and i should
13. I Don’t Care - Fall Out Boy
“I don't care what you think, As long as it's about me, The best of us can find happiness in misery”
..... yep. that last line especially. n just the whole song is big bakugou energy
14. The Suffering - Coheed and Cambria
“If it was up to me, I would have never walked out, So until the sun burns out, Oh, I hope you're waiting”
oooo and “Should we try this again with hope (Bye, bye) Or is it lost, give up the ghost, And should I die all alone as I knew I would, (Then burn in hell young sinner)”
pls i love this song sm, it’s just a rlly good song and it also have massive massive bakugou vibes so thats always a plus
,,,, okay and this last one- and jesus it hurts
15. My Hero - Foo Fighters
no bc it u think about how upset bakugou was after kamino?? with all mights retirement?? pls
“Kudos, my hero, leavin' all the mess, You know my hero, the one that's on, There goes my hero, Watch him as he goes, There goes my hero, He's ordinary”
no bc every single day i think about writing a novel on how much bakugou AND DEKU were affected by all might’s shitty teaching n the ways it’ll probably always set them up to be rivals in some capacity
110 notes · View notes
nagdabbit · 3 years
Text
MY GIRLFRIEND HAD THINGS ABOUT DYNAMITE TO SAY AGAIN
"theyre really gonna make me watch hager. theyre really gonna do me like this. the opener is hangman's slot, fuck outta here with this."
"undefeated! bruh, this bitch only had three fights, and the last one was a dq cuz he can't keep it above the belt. that ain't something to be proud of, that's literally doing mma wrong."
"this man is a dumb, transphobic cunt." - this one wasn't a joke, it's just true.
"wardlow is just a great big boxer boi, huh."
"this is booooooring, fake mma is boring. regular mma is boring and it's literally one of my hobbies!"
siobhan upon getting even more bored: "i'm gonna make tea in honor of... this. its just honey for wardlow and a whole bottle of vodka to forget." me: "how is that tea?" siobhan: "ill use icecubes shaped like leaves. it still counts."
"i still think i should be allowed to hang with kingston for just like ten minutes. that's all we need to cause significant property damage."
"i need someone to clip darby yeeting himself at someone, but add the song wrecking ball."
"i am still manifesting hook's shoulder-waist ratio. can you imagine? those shoulders and my tits. exquisite."
"who hasn't won a fight with the clever use of zipties?" *darby proceeds to lose* "alright, fine, *I* have won a fight with the clever use of zip ties."
"small arn better wrestle in those goddamn loafers."
"kris is the best friend with custody of their single collective braincell, right? right? you're not agreeing with me. why aren't you agreeing with me?"
"i have no notes, this match was perfect, i would die for all of these himbos and the alien."
"peter avalon should be the leader of the wingmen and the fact that he isnt is a hatecrime against me, personally."
"i just think, personally, this callis character should be murdered. and in case this is ever used as evidence in a court of law, i am making a joke, but also callis isn't real, so." *several seconds of googling later* "oh he IS real. huh."
"wrestling sure is kinky, huh?"
"i just think that hook and his dorito shoulder-waist ratio should wrestle, not small arn."
sitting up straight and yelling, "HEY, SMALL ARN IS VERY GOOD, ACTUALLY? DID YOU KNOW ABOUT THIS?"
"i take back the joke about about loafers, i like this young old man."
"when does andrade debut, why is he not in a ring wrecking shop right this instant, why am i not watching andrade."
"i do not care for the blondes. they bore me."
apropos of nothing, during a commercial break: "did i ever tell you about that time i snapchat'd running from the cops? like i was recording them while they chased me through a park, right? i dont remember why, i think i was just walking home and walked by a crime but i dont fuck with bacon so i booked it. that's like the same energy of joey janela. joey would snapchat running from the cops."
"they havent booked penelope vs jade cargill because they know i would absolutely cause major flooding in this region and don't want that on their conscience."
"oh, she f l e x i b l e."
"miro is so menacing and terrifying, but he could honestly talk my goddamn pants off."
"if anyone hurts vickie i will lose my goddamn mind. i will riot. i will drive to florida and wreck a bitch."
"santana and ortiz are my favorite tag team, i want it on record. they're good boys, brent."
"shut the fuck up dash." - she couldnt remember which was dax and which was cash
"oh they're still doing just the one women's match a week, huh. i see how it is. does tony just not like women?"
"i looked up smart mark sterling and unfortunately i would die to protect him."
"i want to fight jade. in both the horny and non-horny way."
various names shes called the young bucks because she refuses to remember their name(s): buckaroo bozos, mikey and nike, buck offs, jim and the other one, the fraternal twins, steel panther, matthew 7:21 (and i quote, "it's the only verse i remember that isnt the cold steve one), knob jackson, the fuck outta here, frat boys, alter boys, not this dumbass again, mrs. jackson's greatest shames, discount lucha bros, horse girls
"what the fuck do you mean karl is the older one?!"
"i like kaz. let him do like one murder, he's earned it."
"put penta in a dc movie, you cowards."
"go back to impact, leave my son eddie alone you fucks."
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