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neominthe · 2 days

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SPOILERS FOR SCTIR FOR +CH 200

CW: (possibly) Eating disorder ED, depression

Something that keeps me awake at night: at the beggining of the story, Yoohyun's death isn't so painful for the viewers, because we only see what is on the surface of the Han brothers' life. It's through memories and flashbacks that we get to learn 3 facts: Yoojin dedicated his entire life to Yoohyun, they parted ways and in the end they reunited, only for one of them die. That's the introduction of SCTIR for us. Moreover, Yoojin is desesperate to leave the past behind, so he doesn't linger on his traumatic memories for too long, hence why the pain of reading SCTIR isn't instant.

It is gradual.

Yoojin and we learn that the past was never erased. It still happened, and exists in the form of Yoohyun's body out in the cold. Gradually, it becomes more apparent how Yoojin is still so affected by his previous life, despite his fear resistance skill. It starts with small things like him avoiding eating unless someone tells him to do so, always occupying himself with tasks that could be handled by someone else, negative thoughts about himself for every single action he takes and so on. I love, with all my heart, the manhwa, but the novel makes it so much more apparent how Yoojin loathes himself, to the point he keeps wishing he wasn't a human being, rather an item for his brother to use. It's so messed up to want to abandon all your humanity, feelings and concept of self just so you can be of help.

SCTIR is fun to read, but even more so with the unreliable narrator that is Yoojin. He sees what he does as nothing impressive, considering the people he is surrounded with, despite running the kisengsu facility, negotiating with the hair loss company to develop a new product, managing Seok Hayan's research team, mantaining diplomatic ties with Japan, training and helping other hunters and, most importantly, caring for all the S classes. He worries for their well-being because it's only natural for him to do so, as the Perfect Caregiver.

And, in the middle of it all, the only thing Yoojin spares for himself is hate. He doesn't want to live long for himself, but rather for Yoohyun, even though Yoojin already has been through the pain of loss. When Yoojin died in chapter 241, the first thing that he thought was Yoohyun. He didn't even think about how much it hurted dying (with a freaking shot on the head)! He just wanted to reunite and soothe Yoohyun that he was okay.

Speaking of which, in Sigma's arc, as Yoojin was alone, he really stopped caring for his well-being, so Sung Hyunjae took that role and did everything he could to help Yoojin. But, for him to even have to create a quest just so Yoojin could eat is what sparked my lizard brain to write this post.

My point is, there isn't an arc dedicated for recovery (at least until the chapter I have read that is like, ~300) and that is beautiful, because Yoojin is still processing what he went through, and we get to see that. Yoojin has such an interesting character arc as he begins wanting to forget the past, as it is too painful, to start running after it. He can't let go of it, because letting it go means letting his little brother go too. Which is why he says he will never be okay again in chapter 278.

#i sound delusional #i like to see him suffer okay!#its good angst #i didnt expect sctir to have so much angst #actually I SHOULD HAVE EXPECTED THAT!!!!#im actually rereading s classes #but its like a whole new experience #its so good #SCTIR IS SO GOOD #sctir #the s classes that i raised #s classes that i raised #han yoojin #han yoohyun #spoilers #sung hyunjae

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mrsoftthoughts · 3 days

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We need to discuss all the implications of being a pregnant mortal in the Riordanverse when the baby you're carryingn is a greecoroman demigod

Because you can't look me dead in the eyes and tell me that that thing would be a normal pregnancy down any standards

I mean, there's a good chance that this it's only Rick forgetting about the math once again, but Sally's pregnancy should haven been either 3 months or between 11-14 months, and i feel like baby Percy would have wanted to stay there the longest possible because idk, just being comfy in his momma belly full of liquid

And i don't even want to think about being esperanza Valdez with a fetus capable of fuckin combust at any moment, beryl grace getting electroshocks everytime that Thalia kicked or anything that could happen with Maria di Angelo and her Two kids of the lord of the death

And Also exist the possibility that the mortal body isn't taking well having a interspecies fetus that maybe has a chance to act like ambrosia or nectar making that you feel like if you were burning from your insides because way too much Divinity too handle

And there's more

A Demigod can be born troug a C-section without the Doctors seeing something that a mortal definitely shouldn't? Who knows how a Demigod looks when they still in the uterus, there's even a chance of them having a minor scale "real" form as their parents, a now the doctor is fuckin blind

And how many times some of the mortal parents being really freaked out about this and knowing that they can't keep the baby have tried to get an abortion, in the best case it would work and now everything is ok..... But you can even abort a Demigod?? At least trough mortal methods, because i feel like there's a pretty big chance of this doesn't working

There's also a chance of this doesn't looking like a pregnancy at all, being honest this born from my headcanon of the Apollo kids gestations being unnoticeable ( since that apollos reaction towards sally pregnancy was really weird) and that i already mentioned in a previos post , but what if there's also the chance of you being completely oblivious towards this and then BOOM !! Baby

And then we have that the possibilities are low but never zero for a "pregnancy" like the ones of Castor and Pollux and Helen and Clytemnestra happening nowadays

And ofc... That we shouldn't look away for the possibilities of Mpreg with mortals being the ones carrying the baby, the limit with weird things here is inexistent to this point ( I'm not talking about Darren Knowles here btw, unless that you pull out the trans!Darren headcanon it's obvious that the one that give birth to kayla was Apollo, not for being a god, but because this man is such a bottom)

As a summary: Don't get pregnant from a god, theres a chance of it being terrifying

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atzfilm · 1 day

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— 『 𝐖𝐎𝐍𝐃𝐄𝐑𝐖𝐀𝐋𝐋; 𝐨𝐭8 』 [seven.five.]

— 𝚠𝚘𝚗 • 𝚍𝚎𝚛 • 𝚠𝚊𝚕𝚕, adjective. having someone who serves as a pillar in your life, who offers a sturdy place to lean in times of trouble. somebody you find yourself thinking about constantly and are completely infatuated with.

❝humans were such strange creatures. wretched in their mere existence. none of the eight were ever truly interested in them until they found you. they just find it strange that despite their status and rank, you'd rather spend time with your lover. that isn't much of a problem, though. one they can fix with ease.❞

— pairing; ot8 (general); 2.03k

— chapter warnings; death, death mentions, murder mentions

〘ʏᴀɴᴅᴇʀᴇ, ᴍʏᴛʜ, ꜱᴍᴜᴛ, ꜰᴀᴇʀɪᴇꜱ〙(m.list)

FIC WARNINGS: murder, manipulation, blood, blood drinking, torture references, dark magic, kidnapping. this series is very dark, if you're uncomfortable with the subjects listed do not read. warnings will change but be listed in each chapter. there is no tag list for this series.

“Negotiating without your spark behind you is brave, Hongjoong. Many would rather have some semblance of power behind them when they speak,” the Seelie speaks, leaning against the stone pillar.

“Why would I be afraid of your kind in my land?” Hongjoong merely states, arms resting against the small of his back. His gaze flickers to the Seelie’s partner, a dry laugh escaping him. “I desired for a conversation alone, Yeonjun. How hard is that to follow?”

“I am not stupid. You have already killed Beomgyu, no? Why would I enter this putrid realm myself?” His words are filled with venom, eyes narrowing as he looks down at the Unseelie leader. Fearsome gazes do nothing to Hongjoong, only satiating his desire for negative emotions. So Hongjoong smiles, head tilted.

“We have yet to fortify our treaty. Deaths are increasing on both sides - my home territory needs to be moved soon. I cannot have Seelie interrupting while we enter another realm of rowan trees.”

“Afraid?"

“Merely bothered.”

“A bothersome act wouldn’t call for a meeting between us, Unseelie,” he glances back, waving off his partner. The man disappears, leaving the two leaders alone. “You have yet to atone for killing one of my own.”

“I will not allow you to take out any of my spark, Yeonjun.”

Yeonjun laughs, his head thrown back to the skies. “I am not a buffoon, Hongjoong. My offer is a small price to pay for what you’ve done to my spark. Give up the human in exchange, and I vow to not interfere with Unseelie unless provoked.”

Hongjoong’s brows furrow, “You want the pet? Why?” His chest aches suddenly, but Hongjoong holds back his expression. What the hell was that?

Yeonjun’s smile only widens. “An Unseelie kills humans, Hongjoong. You wouldn’t have it around if it was not important to you.”

“If she is important to me, why do you think I’d give her up on a whim?”

“This discussion between us is not on a whim. It is either the human, or one of your spark’s lives. Make the decision. And soon, Hongjoong,” Yeonjun steps back, mist left in his wake.

He can feel that same ache again. He was not sure what exactly it was, the strange feeling scratching at his heart. He ignored it at first, pushing through the hallways, determined to finish his duties here so he could go back to his spark.

But then it grew painful.

Hongjoong stumbles as he crosses a threshold, gasping for breath. His fingernails grow, digging into the wooden slabs. Blood spills from his lips, splattering against the floor. The feeling is unlike anything he's experienced, but his body knows. He cannot tell who it is at first, his mind whirling. Until a part of him begins to tear at itself, ripping his heart from the inside out.

San.

“No.” He pushes past the pain, the phantom of a gaping hole in his chest. He hasn't been gone that long, how could this happen? Why isn't Hongjoong there now? His speech is stuttered as he stands, the air swirling in front of him. His incantation is slurred but he manages after a few seconds of struggle. The cloud flickers in and out of existence. He steps through just as it appears, body shifting into the garden of his home.

He does not see much at first.

His eyes flick up to the porch, a massive gap presenting itself to him. Glass shards are scattered across the wood. He thinks for a moment that he arrived in the aftermath, until shouting surrounds him. His steps are quick, hand out in front of him as he rips the doors from its hinges with quick incantations. The first thing he sees is Yunho and Yeosang in the midst of a fight with witchlings.

Little time passes between him watching the fight and tearing the witchlings apart, limbs dropping to the floor violently, blood splattering against his cheeks. The remaining creatures disappear from sight, leaving the solemn echoes of the hallway. Yeosang struggles to his feet, pushing past Hongjoong and falling to his knees in front of San. The wound on his body has not healed in the slightest, limp in Yeosang's arms. Hongjoong can barely stand as he looks at the sight, but he must. He looks around, entering your room.

Glass is scattered across the floor. The same scene he saw from the ground, the hold the size of the creatures, looking back at him. Wind rushes into the room as he makes his way forward. You're nowhere to be found and after a brief headcount, neither is Wooyoung. He cannot feel the loss of him, so he presumes that he is taken along with you. He runs his bloodied fingers through his hair, thoughts elsewhere.

Grief is not something he can let himself process now. He has to save Wooyoung. He has lost one, he cannot lose him too. Hands dig into his shoulder and turn him around. His eyes move up. Mingi's cold gaze on him. His eyes are vacant, mind elsewhere. Waiting for a command from his leader. Hongjoong’s lip trembles as he tries to speak, lids shutting. He cannot grieve for him right now. They rely on him, rely on his strength to pull them through. To save who he has left. He takes only a couple of seconds to pull himself together, sadness swallowed momentarily.

“Do you know where they came from? If the kumiho had something to do with it?” He asks Mingi.

“I–”

“Is that all you can say?” Seonghwa enters the room. Tears stain his cheeks, moist, tired eyes meeting his. He can feel the exhaustion through their spark’s connection, the feeling forcing Hongjoong to stagger ever so slightly. “San is dead, and that's all you can say?”

“I cannot afford to let myself grieve, Seonghwa. I have to save Wooyoung –”

“San… he…” Seonghwa rubs his face. “He sacrificed everything, everything to be with us. He turned against his own kind, forced himself to feast on tortured souls. He gave us his all, his life, and all you can say now is that you cannot grieve? Not even for a moment? Yeosang can barely hold himself together in there, your spark is hurt, and you cannot afford mere seconds to acknowledge the dead body?”

Hongjoong cannot respond. He cannot let himself wallow in sorrow. Not when there is so much to do. He dismisses Mingi with a small nod, letting him leave the room. Seonghwa's anger only grows at the silence, stepping forward. His fist grips Hongjoong’s shirt, knuckles digging into his chest.

“You are selfish, and you are pitiful. I am amazed that San even wanted to be with us when he saw you.”

Hongjoong reaches up, his fingers brushing against Seonghwa's chin. Seonghwa allows him to cup his cheek, grip loosening on his shirt. “You can say what you need to say to me after, Seonghwa. Would you like me to sink into my grief or help find Wooyoung?”

Seonghwa pushes his hand away, his anger only rises. “All you’ve ever done is care for Wooyoung and no one else. Even in death we are not enough for you, never the first thing on your mind.”

“Enough,” Yunho enters the room, glancing between them. His clothing is soaked in gore and blood, footwear sliding against the wooden slacks barely holding the floor together. Wounds cover his body, slowly healing. Mingi shadows him, gaze turned back to Yeosang’s grieving, hunched over figure only a few strides away. Jongho sits next to him, hand resting on his trembling shoulder. “We’ve lost so much already, we cannot lose each other and ourselves too.”

Hongjoong could have stopped the conversation long ago and demanded that Seonghwa stand down. Any other Unseelie leader would have barely acknowledged the death at all – likely twisting their face in disgust and burning the remains without thinking twice. It is what he has been taught, what has been passed down to him. But right now he cannot. He cannot just send San away without giving the others some time to accept what has happened. Give himself time to accept the cold, empty look in his eyes.

“How did this happen?” Hongjoong asks again, this time to no one in particular.

Seonghwa leaves with a flicker, Yunho and Mingi left alone with their leader. “We cannot say. Jongho mentioned something about pixies watching on the edge of the forest, but they wouldn’t summon these creatures. Seelie are incapable of controlling these beasts, especially when we just manifested the shield when we came back. No other majik should be able to penetrate the barrier. This shouldn’t have happened.”

“You think they attacked because I was not here?” Hongjoong looks behind Yunho, blood staining the floor in pools. “Would they have attacked even if I were?”

“It’s doubtful. A spark without its leader is greatly weakened in comparison to when they are here. They might have noticed you were absent and took that chance to attack. Taking y/n away makes sense since she is valuable, removing San–”

They can see how it pains Yunho, his lids tightening as he closes them. He takes a breath, before continuing.

“Removing San makes sense since he is powerful, but I just cannot wrap my head around taking Wooyoung. What purpose does it have – he is not even your second or third. He means much to us, sure, but in retrospect, his position in our spark is not as important.”

“Cruel words,” Mingi mumbles.

“Wooyoung knows how much he is cared for, he’d likely laugh,” Yunho says. “Still, my point remains.”

“Wooyoung is cared for,” Mingi speaks again. “He is important to us. The kumiho cares for him, and Hongjoong cares for him. The leader of all Unseelie favors one in particular. He is a weakness. They, whomever it is that has taken them, must know what they mean to us. They know what we’d do to have them back. It is strategic, Yunho.”

“Can you two give me a moment?” Hongjoong interrupts their speaking. “I agree with everything you are saying, but I need time. Not much, but just...”

“Understood,” Yunho nods. His fingers seek Mingi’s, theirs wrapping easily around each other. Before they leave, though, Yunho turns around. “Shall we do something with San?”

Hongjoong takes a slow breath. “Place him in our memorial chambers once Yeosang is … Do not light the flame yet and do not allow anyone else to. I need a moment to think.”

“Alright.”

They leave him in the room. Hongjoong whispers a spell into his palms, misting himself into his chambers. He locks the door behind him, taking slow steps into the room. It’s as he has left it, papers skewed about, books piled upon one another. The sinking feeling lets itself manifest in his chest, slowly rising up his torso. He slumps into his bed, the smell of rotting flesh enveloping him as he trembles.

He lost San.

It should not have been possible for any being, including Lilith's creatures, to break the barrier. It is what he has set up and has worked for centuries. Nothing should have been able to come in. To kill. Hongjoong could barely look at San’s body, the cold shell of what he once was. You would think that him being an Unseelie would have him used to seeing the dead. He killed his own spark leader, and that affected him less than seeing his mated gone. His teeth dig into his lips, breaking skin as he holds back his own wretched sobs. He lifts himself up from his sheets, gripping the wooden desk as he stands, looking over his work.

His eyes move to the side, caged spellbooks behind metal bars. His finger drags across his bloodied lip before pressing into the rounded button. Wooyoung would be able to protect the both of you himself momentarily. Losing this chance now would only make him lose San. The rusted bars creak open. He reaches for the one book he swore that he’d never use, flipping through the crusted pages until he lands on the spell he needs.

Necromancy.

#fic: wonderwall #ateez x reader #hongjoong x reader #seonghwa x reader #yunho x reader #mingi x reader #san x reader #jongho x reader #wooyoung x reader #ot8 x reader #ateez fanfiction #ateez fanfic #ateez angst

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a-dauntless-daffodil · 2 days

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I curse you for this angsty thought but

Combining spear baby AU and Mortal Vaggie AU. When an exorcist is killed, they die like normal. But when they die of old age...they change back into whatever weapon they were, ready to start the cycle over.

Even more painful if that weapon would always look like vaggie, but...none of the memories.

ok FINALLY i can get this out of my head, strap in-

Spear child AU Vaggie finds out that even if SHE can't hold her kid without cursing them with memories of blood and every time she used them to kill- at least her kid can hug HER (after a lot of coaching for both them from Charlie) without any murder memories for the kid...

but Vaggie remembers, suddenly, being the weapon of the Exorcist her spear was before that heaven born woman hit the end of her lifespan

Vaggie remembers the kill that turned HER, Vaggie, from a weapon to person, her wielder's final words, an old Exorcist proudly using the last of her strength for one last Extermination day, refusing to fade out quietly up in heaven- struggling to hit that unspoken quota- enough Sinner's killed and enough demonic energy soaked up and purified into a NEW soldier of heaven, a soldier to replace the her as she crumbles into ash and that first moment of life as new born Vaggie instinctively caught the spear as it fell-

in the Mortal Vaggie AU, imagine her horror realizing she will BE a weapon again after death-

(no matter how much she wanted to be Charlie's armor in life. She's an Exorcist. She was made to kill)

unless she's killed before then, violently, while she's still herself.

And she can't ask anyone to do that- Charlie, her friends- (her spear kid??) she doesn't WANT one SECEOND less time with them than she can get, will NEVER stop fighting for her life with them

but it's terrifying, thinking how someone ELSE might pick her up afterwards... the husk she came from (no personality traits are passed down between incarnations) (the only memories an new Exorcist is born with are the deaths that fanned the fames of their new battle forged lives) an inert tool, unable to stop herself from being used to hurt people

the weapon left behind by her natural death will still be PART of her. And she doesn't want any part of her to go back to being what she was. She never wants to be a weapon like that again, blindly used to hurt and kill and wipe souls from existence while they run screaming

she has to keep telling Charlie- No. She doesn't remember anything from the incarnations before her

no there isn't... isn't any chance of her coming back. Not as herself.

Charlie and that hopeless desperate wish-

(what are a few more thousand dead, really? In the timescale of heaven and hell and all creation, in comparison how many have already died, when weighed against all the GOOD Vaggie has done and still wants to do-)

(all the pain Charlie doesn't want to face in losing her)

Vaggie asks for her weapon form to be destroyed after her time runs out

she begs Charlie to promise her-

Destroy her, it, melt it with hellfire, or re-forge her weapon self into something harmless- she wouldn't mind being a shield, if there's enough metal in her weapon form for that. She would love the thought of still being able to protect the people she loves

that might be to hard (emotionally) or not practical, physically speaking, and that's fine too. Just. Don't let her stay a weapon

Vaggie, getting older, feeling her age long before the other Exorcists will because she refuses to go back to heaven, can't stomach the idea of wasting one moment of her life up there or worse- fading out there far away from Charlie

She makes Charlie SWEAR to unmake whatever's left of her. So NO part of her can EVER be used as a mindless weapon again

and Charlie promises.... and Charlie....

breaks the promise

(her one worst sin will always be reckless Hope, all consuming Love) she incorporates Vaggie's weapon into her own trident instead, and sure she doesn't go OUT of her way to kill with it-

she doesn't hold back either, whenever the time comes

their daughter was born from a mix of sinners deaths, mixed, balanced, purified by the angels Vaggie killed later

Their daughter is getting older too- not as fast as Vaggie was- more divine energy stored up in her, gotten direct from the source instead of just used to to transform the power of hell into something heaven could use- but she IS still aging, and faster than Charlie is

if this is just "how things work" then Charlie going to have to watch her daughter die too someday. If she isn't killed, she'll outlive her child.

She can't.

She can't hide behind a shield apologizing anymore, Vaggie's not here to be the one who stabs attacking angels so they stay DOWN- Vaggie is dead and if it's forever then their daughter will follow her

Charlie has to do it, for both of them. And the hotel. She has to kill. It's just practical, just self defense, just a little not-quite lie about what she did with Vaggie's weapon-

(it was damaged. Chipped in a small but noticeable way)

(her missing eye-?)

And if part of Charlie keeps count while this desperate little hope flutters at the back of her mind, wondering if maybe... just maybe....

no, though

One day she finds herself suddenly holding the hand of a confused and bloody but ready to fight Exorcist in the middle of a battle, and it's not. Vaggie.

They know how to kill. They don't know who to be killing

(hellborn and sinners and angels, Charlie's had to stop so many people, wondering- worrying- if that would help or hurt the chances of Vaggie ever-)

The new Exorcist attacks everything in sight

Charlie's friends, the other Exorcists, Sinners, it's all she can remember, blood in red and glowing gold-

not Charlie, Charlie is familiar (no but not like THAT) the hand she woke holding and caught her when she staggered, band new to being able to move on her own, arms and legs and wings and one eye missing

Charlie's the one who grabs her mid attack and stops her with a hug that'd break a sinner's back-

Charlie, wiping away the blood on this stranger's confused face, tracing that scarred and empty eye she knows SO well and whispering a name with so much HOPE

(not seeing the horror on her friend's faces, the devastated shock from her daughter)

It's not Vaggie.

Even if she looks exactly like her, the answering twist of her face is new and she does something Vaggie never did- she pulls away, looks away, looks at the Exorcists all stopped and grinning (people like her, the same wings, black and white and powerful with every feather clearly marked with purpose)

a bell tolls and the Exorcists retreat back towards a gate in the sky like a burning wheel of light, matching the far off spheres of heaven, and the new Exorcist flares her wings to follow them-

Charlie stops her, that first time. Desperate. Still hopeful. Maybe Vaggie just needs time to remember...?

Charlie doesn't stop her later

it's the best option, really, even if it means being as alone as she was before meeting Vaggie

more alone than that, even. back then she didn't have so many friends avoiding her and her... "thing"... she didn't have a daughter moving out of the pride ring altogether to get away from her. Back then she could tell herself it was only her parents separation that left alienated her dad from her, instead of Lucifer being torn between his daughter and his grandchild. She hadn't known what it was like to have a partner, before Vaggie, and now without her she doesn't know how to live without one

she knows she shouldn't have done this. She shouldn't call the woman by her dead wife's name or keep showing her bits of a life that'd never been hers

so Charlie makes a promise, again. And keeps it this time. She talks to heaven, finds a way to get the new Exorcist up there-

(SHE PROMISED VAGGIE SHE PROMISED HER)

-even though Vaggie wouldn't want that. Not a weapon. Not again.

(vaggie would have asked her to kill the new exorcist instead)

Charlie knows it even a she lets the Exorcist with Vaggie's face and voice and missing eye fly away, off through the portal to a life Vaggie wouldn't have wanted any part in....

but if it's not Vaggie, then it's the stranger's life now. Hers to choose

(a nice thought to hide behind. In no world can Charlie destroy any part of what was once the woman she loved)

And if maybe this stranger IS in some small way Vaggie... maybe... maybe THIS will help her remember. Maybe pain will do what Charlie's soft words and hands couldn't do

Up in heaven though...

a scarred Exorcist is a damaged weapon, is a weaken one. This Exorcist has killed sinners and hellborn and ANGELS, she knows the taste of divine blood

She looks at the angels around her the way her sisters look at demons down in hell. As prey

Lute notices

Lute doesn't trust her with a weapon, doesn't trust her down in hell. Lute remembers the feel of the spear at her throat- and that woman is GONE, but- this one came from hell. Came from the Morningstar demon bitch. Can't be trusted not to be tainted by all that

The new exorcist gets put on spy duty instead. Go work for Emily, supposedly. Watch over "reformed" sinners up in heaven

(Sir Pentious, flinching every time he sees her) (reminiscing about a friend he knew back down in hell while casting her nervous, painful glances)

Watch and report back to Lute, pretend to be the bodyguard of the souls who got a second unfair bite at the apple-

ACTUALLY be their bodyguard, when the moment comes

When Lute hits her breaking point and Sera is swayed by fear of a threat from within, a new line drawn, when the Exorcists turn on the angels who don't REALLY belong in heaven, who will never REALLY have earned after failing once- trying to kill them again

and the instinct kicking in

the woman with Vaggie's face and how RIGHT it feels to fight angels- finally that sense of purpose coursing through her, the golden blood, someone cowering behind her and she spreads her wings and-

PROTECTS

(Charlie killed with her so many times. Never out of hate. Always a last resort. Always trying to save more people than she hurt)

(a sideways, unknowing way that Charlie kept the same promise she broke- that part of her Vaggie loved and wanted to share in, the urge to help, to defend, even in a world that demands killing as a price of stopping more death)

The woman with Vaggie's face isnt and will never BE her

but she and Emily are the reason the reformed souls aren't slaughtered up in heaven

Charlie's hotel (no, always "their" hotel to her) is suddenly full of old friends and their friends, their families from up in heaven, angels leaving in disgust through the same portal as the truth of heaven's lie is exposed to ALL of heaven now, not just a court of those who made it what it is

and it's. Maybe something Vaggie would love, if she could see it

It's Charlie's one last time reaching out to the new Exorcist, offering her a place in the hotel too...

and it's Charlie taking it in, what it means, when the woman with Vaggie's face chooses to stay up in heaven

the woman who isn't Vaggie- (Vaggie never would have left) (NEVER would chose heaven over hell)- explains heaven is where most angels are, after all. And she likes it quite a lot- making angels bleed

(she's a weapon)

(Vaggie worked hard to make herself into something else. and she did. and now Vaggie's-) (Dead)

Charlie hopes Vaggie would be okay with this, somehow.

Or maybe it would have made Vaggie sick, watching Charlie get left behind (left alone again) by someone wearing her own face

...SO!

*slotting this in deliciously with the spear baby au stuff*

alright what we've got so far is...

Exorcist weapons soak up the demonic energy of the sinners they kill, carrying it back up to heaven with them where divine ointment or whatever is used to clean them afterwards, turning the demonic energy into something they can slowly convert into actual divine energy

Once they get enough kills and power, the weapon incarnates as a new heavenly soldier, specifically suited for visiting and fighting in hell

Their current Exorcist form lasts a set amount of time, and would start wearing down if they weren't given halos to supplement their slowly dwindling power

the halos keep them "young" up until the moment they fade away into ashes and weaponry again

they ALSO finish converting the Exorcist's demonic energy back into it's base form as divine power or the "force of creation" used by the higher ranking angels like the Seraphim

Basically redistributing power from hell to heaven AS WELL AS reducing the population of sinners

without the halo the demonic power just slowly bleeds out on it's own and gets absorbed by whatever's around

(AU NOTE: this would mean a bit of Vaggie's power probably got incorporated into the things and people she spent the most time around- Charlie, her spear which later turned into her kid, the hotel, her friends)

The SHAPE of the Exorcist continues with the weapon they're born from, but they lack souls, and no personal memories get passed down between incarnations

Since they are being built up from the kills they're used for though, THOSE memories are the only ones the new Exorcist is born with

Damage done to an Exorcist with heavenly steel carries over into the weapon they come from, and the next incarnation they take

Weapons that get damaged before they take enough lives to spawn into a new Exorcist are probably melted down to make a new weapon instead

That didn't used to happen very often though, because Adam encouraged abandoning any weapon that gets so much as scratched or tweeked down in hell- he didn't like the idea of his girls being less than exactly how he wanted them

Lute stops that after his death and the revelation that heavenly weapons can kill angels

Normally the Exorcist weapons incarnate as fully grown women, ready for action just like the weapons they come from

Spear! baby had a gap of several years with NO new kills powering them, and Vaggie wasn't trying to fill any quotas afterwards, so the energy build up was erratic and kill counts lessened bc of fighting next to Charlie. Being around Charlie in and out of battle, and near her half-seraphim power, also meant some of that was slurrped up, resulting in a form that WASN'T ready for battle but COULD absorb more power even after incarnating, letting the Spear! baby grow up as she gathered more passive energy (and later her own kills)

If she killed angels regularly enough or moved to heaven she could probably stay young for her entire life. But she isn't so she won't.

The other weapons abandoned in hell didn't get any divine cleansing to convert the demonic energy into something their heavenly steel could use, so they all stayed inert until killing angels started to be a thing.

Vaggie's was the first to rack up enough angel kills for the rest of the demonic energy to get mixed and changed to the point of spontaneous spear baby creation

Carmilla Carmine discovers that the other weapons can ALSO do this tho

She is slightly less than amused that chaggie failed to warn her

#hazbin hotel #vaggie #charlie morningstar #chaggie #spear baby au thing #vaggie aging wings au #angst #character death #BLARGH #au world building mainly tho i guess...

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eddiediazismyhusband · 14 hours

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lmao buck didnt ditch tommy last episode, he just made a pit stop before going to spend the night with tommy, like do you think he spent the whole night there? and yeah, this episode, if he does leave tommy to go help eddie, that's what friends do ?? like what do you expect him to do, just ignore his friends life completely falling apart? buck is an adult relationship and adults respect the fact that they arent always going to be no 1 first priority ALL of the time. tommy respects that, especially because eddie is actively in a spiral, and honestly it's really refreshing to see such a healthy depiction of the balance between romantic/platonic relationships. i mean how many times have other couples been interrupted by similar emergencies, this is literally the emergency show like. yeah obviously when there is an emergency, the characters are going to drop everything and go to it. I swear you people have never had adult relationships, romantic or platonic, because you see a normal healthy relationship and are incapable of enjoying it. "not anti bi buck, just anti tommy kinard" not anti bi buck, just anti any relationship buck has with a man that isn't eddie

wow what did i say?? that was quick!

if you think buck left eddie’s house after hearing eddie say the words “yeah me too” in reference to being worried about him, then you do not know buck at all.

also when have we seen tommy respecting anything with buck? you all live in these made up scenarios that lou blabs on cameo when in reality all we have seen is tommy constantly be dismissive towards buck unless buck is actively paying sole attention to him. that is not a perfect and healthy relationship.

tommy is constantly speaking down to buck, calling him “kid” and refusing to call buck by the name he chose for himself. that is not the sign of someone who cares about buck to me.

as for being against any relationship buck is in with s man…. give me a man who actually shows that he gives a flying fuck about buck. give me a man who isn’t constantly being condescending and rude. give me a man who’s whole backstory wasn’t as a tool to put hen and chimney through hell at the 118. if buck was dating literally any other guy i wouldn’t be anywhere near as fed up with this plotline; but the fact of the matter is we have BARELY seen anything between them that isn’t tommy being a dick to buck unless buck is kissing him. that doesn’t read as a positive and healthy relationship to me. you all claim to care about buck so much, but then actively defend everything tommy does that is rude and condescending to buck as if buck somehow deserves it.

i am capable of enjoying normal healthy adult relationships because i have watched this show for seven years. i have seen these characters drop things for emergencies. i have picked up on the patterns they have laid down in previous storylines. i have experience working in filmmaking and know how to read into things.

normally i look at these asks and laugh because i don’t like to give a platform to people like you who hide begind anon to try and make buddie shippers out to be monsters but the fact that that post hasn’t even been up for ten minutes and you already felt the need to type a whole anon ask about how wrong i am when none of what you’ve pointed out has any canonical evidence of living in the truth? i have to laugh.

the block button is free. filtering out the anti tags is free. if you’re one of my followers…. when have i ever posted anything that would make you think i was pro tommy in any way that got you to follow me in the first place?

since you sent the ask on anon and i have no way of doing it myself, i invite you to go to my page and press the block button… the anti tags exist for a reason and if you don’t wanna see anti tommy content, either filter out the tags or block my blog. simple as that.

#911 abc #911 #911 spoilers #911 on abc #911 season 7 #eddie diaz #evan buckley #buck and eddie #buddie #buddie 911 #anti tommy kinard #anti bucktommy #not anti bi buck anti tommy kinard

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witheredallium · 2 days

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Feeling Feminine

(I don’t know where this would be on the timeline or if it would exist on the timeline, but here you go. Also, I’m calling Patient 66, Christy. AKA the one where Alex deals with gender issues.)

The day was off to a rough start. Alex had woken up and immediately knew that something was off. Alex huffed in front of their bedroom mirror, even trying to put on their favorite black and orange pumpkin sweater, but it didn’t do anything to help. Alex was thankful it was Saturday and didn’t have to go to work feeling like shit. Christy was visiting for the weekend, so when Alex went downstairs to make some toast, she quite quickly noticed something was off.

“Good morning,” she said, looking up from the newspaper she was reading at the dining table.

“Morning. Glad to see you helped yourself to my fridge already,” Alex noted the dirty plate and pan of scrambled eggs.

“Of course,” she smiled, setting down the newspaper. “Food always tastes better when you steal it from a friend’s fridge. You seem off. What’s up with you?”

“Eh, I don’t know,” Alex shrugged, plopping two pieces of bread into the toaster. “Just feel kind of weird today.”

“Weird how? Is something wrong?”

“Oh no, nothing’s wrong. I just feel like I don’t look right today.”

“Mm,” the woman hummed. “I understand that. What doesn’t look right?”

The bread popped up in the toaster and Alex began to spread the butter. “Well you know me, I’m not really a feminine person often. I mean, I do wear dresses from time to time to make me feel more feminine. But I didn’t really want to wear a dress this morning and my sweater didn’t help and I feel wrong. Like, I don’t feel feminine enough.”

Christy stood up and offered Alex a hug. They set down the butter knife and gladly hugged her. Christy’s hugs were the best and Alex hardly ever said no to them unless they didn’t want to be touched. After the hug, Alex grabbed their plate of toast and brought it back to the table to sit with Christy.

“I was going to paint my nails later anyway, so I could paint yours as well. Or, I brought along my eyeshadow that I could put on for you. Would either of those help?” Christy offered.

Alex lit up at the thought. They hadn’t tried either of those before, but it was definitely worth a shot.

After they finished eating they cleared off the table. Christy had brought some light green colored nail polish, which Alex was pretty excited about. Although their favorite color was orange, green was a close second. Christy gently took one of Alex’s hands into hers. She hummed in appreciation for their healthy long nails and gently shook the nail polish bottle in preparation. Taking the cap off the bottle, she carefully covered each of Alex’s nails in the green lacquer. The paint was sort of cold at first before Alex got used to it. It was sort of mesmerizing for them to watch Christy paint their nails. Other than the awful smell, causing them to open a window, having their nails painted made Alex feel quite happy.

“Do you feel a bit better now?” the woman asked as she noticed their small smile.

Alex nodded, “A little bit.”

“Do you still want the eyeshadow?”

“Yes, please,” Alex nodded again.

Christy only had some bright blue eyeshadow with her and she knew it would look absolutely awful with Alex’s pumpkin sweater, and told Alex this. They shook it off, just wanting the experience of the eyeshadow than the actual look. Christy opened the small palette, took the small brush out, and filled it. She asked Alex to close their eyes and began applying the color gently. Alex chuckled softly, the brush tickled a bit and it was kind of weird not being able to see what was going on. Just as quickly as it began, it was over. The two got up from the table and went to the bathroom so Alex could see how they looked.

“Oh, man. Those colors do look terrible together,” Alex laughed with Christy softly chuckling along. They were happy though, because if you ignored the clashing colors, the eyeshadow did look nice on them.

Thanks to Christy, Alex felt quite a bit better now. They figured they would have to buy some nail polish and eyeshadow the next time they went out to the store. Alex thanked Christy by making lunch for the two of them. The rest of the day was spent chatting and chilling. There may or may not have been some wine shared while the two complained about work. Once Clyde had woken up for the evening, it laughed at Alex’s makeup for a solid two minutes before complimenting the nail polish and going outside to hunt. Overall, though Alex had a rough start, it was a pretty good day.

#doai #dreams of an insomniac #doai sitcom au #alex williams doai #patient 66 doai #fanfic #doai clyde

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0046incognito · 2 days

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i promise this isn’t being asked in ill intent, just curiousity:

how does hibiki being trans work since he’s a robot? if i have to guess, was he originally built to be female but he decided he preferred to be male instead? if not, if you’re comfortable can you elaborate on his trans story? <:) i recently rediscovered your art and i think the lgbt rep is very cool 🥺

TRANS ROBOTS IS SOME OF MY FAVORITE PART OF CMY2K WORLDBUILDING especially because both robots as a trans allegory and explicitly transgender-in-text robots are extremely important thematically. and this kind of thing is just interesting to think about!

basically yes hibiki was originally built female but considers himself 100% male instead. the only physical transitioning he's done is he gave himself a haircut partly because he's scared of maintenance/repairs/upgrades, but he's also a kid he's only ten so it's not like he needs much more than a haircut and people respecting his name and pronouns

and he's not the only trans livicom either!! there's quite a few actually, some of which are spoilers because they figure out their gender over the course of the plot and it's key to their free will/self-actualization journey, but plenty others already know they're trans from the start and either have transitioned or fully intend on doing so. mantid for example is in the latter category, and i don't mind spoiling this because it's so inevitable and kind of very obvious with the way he carries himself and hints at wanting it but he literally gets top surgery in his spotlight episode

physically transitioning gender is WAY easier for robots than it is for humans, since rather than having to take hormones and Wait, you can just switch out your parts at will. if you know which screws connect what you can even easily do surgery on yourself to Remove dysphoria-inducing anatomy, it's Adding parts that's more difficult because you have to find someone that will make and provide you with custom parts

but also on that note, livicoms by default don't have genitalia whatsoever, it's just flat down there like a barbie/ken doll UNLESS they're a model that was explicitly made for sex work, so bottom surgery is less of a thing unless they're either A) a sex worker android that wants different anatomy B) a sex worker android that wants No anatomy or C) a non-sex worker android that Wants anatomy

in terms of socially transitioning, when it comes to nonbinary robots, just as many of them use it/its as ones that use they/them, whether it's a matter of "reclaiming the dehumanizing use of it/its or just especially proud of being a robot to the point they don't want anything to do with feigning human identity" [as is the case with KK] or just because it/its is seen as a fairly default gender-neutral pronoun for robots. those aren't the only gender-neutral pronoun options [plenty of neopronouns existed pre-'99]; carmine for example uses xe/xem

speaking of KK, it's my favorite example of being both "robot as a trans allegory" and "textually transgender" at the same time, since its whole thing is "i'm sick and tired of feigning humanity for the sake of making humans more comfortable, just let me be myself [which is a robot that has decided to fully reject human notions of gender]". it's also basically ship of theseused its entire body by replacing/modifying All its parts as its transition, so good for KK

since this is 1999 and all, transphobia and homophobia alike are pretty rampant in society and not as open or known about as it is today, so circles of trans robots modifying their own bodies are kept pretty hush-hush and word of mouth, and they're very tightly knit and plenty of them try to go as stealth as possible. circa episode one hibiki isn't even really remotely aware of any other trans robots, he just came to this conclusion completely on his own and has yet to meet other robots like him, but trans humans keep pretty tightly knit too, so he has zinnia to look at as a trans role model at the very least [since she's a pre-E trans woman trying to go stealth][on the subject, blue is trans too, they're nonbinary and use he/they, but they're not out publicly nor do they know what the word for it is, so most people just call them he/him. zin's the only one that knows and Gets It]

i hope that sufficiently answered your question and if it raised any additional ones i am more than happy to answer^_^

#not art #oc #cmy2k #hibiki himura #mantid #kk #zinnia rosario zayas #jae blue moon #carmine

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autistook · 19 hours

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How well do you think the members of the fellowship would be able to drive

Hmm... Alright, here's what I think:

How the Fellowship acts in cars and can they drive:

Frodo: Great driver. Parks like a master. Probably takes care of his car a lot, unless Sam has already done it. Uses turn signals faithfully and is very careful when behind the wheel. His only driving flaw might just be that he drives too slow because he doesn't want anyone to get hurt, and sometimes Pippin tells him to 'hurry the fuck up grandma.'

Sam: A good driver. Sometimes drives recklessly because he needs to hurry to a flower store before it closes. Extra careful when Frodo is in the car as well. Loves to drive with his family. Uses the horn very easily, because he thinks no one else can drive for shit. Can't parallel park. Says "oh come on!" more than any other driver in the existence.

Merry: Has crashed a lot of cars into trees because he is a reckless and a bad driver. Parks sideways and annoys everyone else. Is probably the one who Sam honks at. Forgets where he left his car and always drops his keys. His car is probably so shit it has smoke coming out of it when driving.

Pippin: Can't drive for shit. Lost his license because he kept crashing to other cars' rears. Drives regularly with Merry on fields though. A passenger princess who puts his legs on the dashboard and chooses the music (which everyone else hates). Screams "LOOK! A COW!" more than anyone can handle.

Aragorn: Doesn't drive. Uses a horse.

Boromir: An ok driver. Instead of using mirrors always turns around his head like an owl. Doesn't use turn signals. When a deer crosses the road he screams so high one would think a fox did the noise.

Gimli: Always rides with Legolas as a proper passenger princess because he once lost his temper to a shitty driver (probably Pippin) so badly, that he was deemed too dangerous for the roads.

Legolas: Gets in near accidents every week because he keeps getting distracted by the beauty of everything around him. He sees a nice tree? Forgets to stare at the road. Otherwise a very graceful driver. Has a smile on the whole time.

Gandalf: You thought Merry and Pippin were reckless? There's reckless and then there's Gandalf. Keeps going over the speed limits, drives like a crazy person, screams at shitty drivers, doesn't use turn signals and probably has a sports car. Magically he never crashes. No one even knows if he has a license. Parks by drifting perfectly into a tiny space.

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biggest-gaudiest-patronuses · 1 year

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putting my prediction on record now that the coming decade is going to see the rise of viral-marketed fancy at-home water filtration systems, driving and driven by a drastic reduction in the quality of U.S. tap water (given that we are in a 'replacement era' where our current infrastructure is reaching the end of its lifespan--but isn't being replaced). also guessing that by the 2030s access to drinkable tap water will be a mainstream class issue, with low-income & unstably housed people increasingly forced to rely on expensive bottled water when they can't afford the up-front cost of at-home filtration--and with this being portrayed in media as a "moral failing" and short-sighted "choice," rather than a basic failure of our political & economic systems. really hope i'm just being alarmist, but plenty of this already happens in other countries, and the U.S. is in a state of decline, so. here's praying this post ages into irrelevance. timestamped April 2023

#apollo don't fucking touch this one #serious post #not a shitpost #hope i forget about this post and have no reason to ever look back on it one day #fyi i'm aware that access to potable water is already a major issue in parts of the U.S. yes i know flint michigan exists #i'm saying that this issue is going to GROW unless local & federal governments work together to fix it.#so it's a matter of if we trust them to fix it. And well--do you?#what are the chances the government just denies there's a problem until the water actually turns brown #at which point it's already been common knowledge for years and people have just become resigned and that's our new normal #i'm mean come on. how many of us already believe that we're being exposed to dangerous pollutants we don't know about and can't avoid #like that's pretty much just part of being a modern consumer. accepting that companies will happily endanger your life for a few pennies #and the most you'll get is like a $50 gift card as part of a class action rebate 20 years down the line #probably the history books will look back on Flint as a warning and a harbinger that went ignored #luxury condos will advertise their built-in top-of-the-line filtration systems--live here and you can drink water straight from your tap!#watch the elite professional class putting $700 dyson water filtration systems on their wedding registry #while the rest of us figure out how to fit water delivery into our grocery budget while putting 90% of our paycheck towards rent #also eggs are $15

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spicynectarines · 6 months

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Mikkian twins based on jellyfish

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sergle · 2 months

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what I was talking abt earlier. we have fully looped back around and away from feminism, societally, whereas before it was very Feminism 101 to acknowledge that many parts of existing as a woman in a misogynistic society are painful and upsetting. not that being a woman is Inherently Negative in a bubble. but that living on this earth, in the conditions we're living in, is hostile to women. and that gender is a performance. that many of the Staples Of Femininity as accepted by society are things that you have to create and perform and mold artificially and aren't inherent, that COMPLAINING about day to day difficulties of existing as a woman is something that you're allowed to do. acknowledging these basic, again, feminism 101 things, that something tied to womanhood is more time consuming or more expensive or more dangerous Because Of The Problems. does not CREATE the problems. that when women complain about having to perform femininity, they are not, in fact, oppressing themselves. the call does not come from inside the fucking house. saying that you HAVE suffered does not fucking equate that you believe you SHOULD have suffered.

like I could talk about this for hours. how braindead and one-dimensional the Takes are getting. "being a woman is looking in the mirror and going fuck yeah i'm a woman" damn. I guess any negative experiences you have by living in a misogynistic world... are your fault if you are anything but positive? "you don't actually want liberation" we've fully gone back to telling feminists "you WANT to be oppressed" when anything negative about our society is pointed out. it's not real until I say it out loud, I guess, and then I'm actually the one who caused it. if anybody expresses any unhappiness with how they're treated or the status quo or the language and culture surrounding womanhood and femininity. they've created it, right that second. they invented it just now. it wasn't a problem before somebody complained, right? also trans women aren't braindead zombies who just follow the flow of whatever cis women around them say. I am pretty fucking sure they are very much aware of pain, and are MORE than aware of the swirling torrent of misogyny and standards of femininity than anybody else. actually. and I am pretty sure someone complaining on tumblr that being a woman means always putting on a performance is going to make someone change their mind about transitioning. also "performing femininity" as a necessity to being treated well as a woman is not fucking NEWS to your Local Trans Woman. I AM PRETTY SURE SHE GETS THE CONCEPT. using trans women as a scapegoat for this braindead perspective on gender politics is spineless, meritless, and pathetic.

#how I feel about my gender is not the same as how I feel about the living conditions of my gender #when I saw that post I screenshotted here I literally sat w my mouth open for a minute #sent it to my friends and was like am I fucking crazy. is this what we're doing now #Forced Positivity and that there is no war in ba sing se and actually #you're ruining children's lives if you complain about misogyny on twitter #I don't HAVE to tell little girls about the downsides because they are already being mistreated #before they have even heard the word 'misogyny' let alone know what it means #you do not have to be fucking happy all the time about the cards you're dealt.#you don't live in a bubble where it's just you and your mirror and your pretty dress and nothing bad has ever happened to you #unfortunately bitch. we will have negative experiences that are in fact. part of the package of being a woman #and IGNORING them doesn't make them not exist. actually they will continue to remain status quo unless acknowledged #sergle.txt #I see so much rhetoric that is JUST old-fashioned gender ideals being presented with liberal language on tiktok #that is just telling women that womanhood is just being a girllll and loving pretty things and being kind and gentleeeee and nurturing #and not working and just like being wholesome and being happy and being a light in ppl's lives and just LOVING LOVING LOVING being a woman #so if for even one second. you don't love it. you are actually failing at being a woman #if you complain about the standards for shaving or putting on makeup. which used to be Baby's First Feminism online #that's actually just you creating problems. you're not supposed to acknowledge it. you're supposed to shut up and smile into the mirror.

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