#true crime and cocktails
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While You're Waiting...
An intermediary post while I’m reading the next book... A plug for my favourite true crime podcast - True Crime and Cocktails.
Produced by Art19, this podcast is hosted by Lauren Ash, most well known for her role as Dina in NBC’s hit show Superstore and her cousin/best friend Christy Oxborrow.
What started out of a guest appearance on Lauren’s old podcast, became a lockdown passion project for the pair. Starting off with a running time around an hour and a half, the episodes got to the point much quicker than they do these days. Mainly, Christy researched the cases of Netflix's first season of the “new” Unsolved Mysteries.
Now on their 132nd episode, the running time passes the two hour mark with at least one episode sitting at three hours. With enthusiasm and humour that’s made me snort in laughter a time or two, they discuss their lives and current or twenty year old pop culture to warm up their audience for half hour to forty-five minutes of the episode.
In my personal opinion, Christy Oxborrow might be the best researcher in audio media at the moment. I understand that on television shows or fancy network podcasts, like Dateline NBC or Crime Beat, their researchers must be more careful with what they say or where they look for details. Nobody wants to get sued. Christy however, will do an occasional social media search or a search of a town’s archives. It adds much more to the episodes, and gives credence to the moments when the pair essentially calls some of the suspects ‘idiots’ (in their own educated opinions).
Christy and Lauren are just as entertaining, even more revealing and connected to their invested listeners on their Patreon. True Crime and Cocktails is the first patreon I’ve ever subscribed to and I think it’s a worthy choice. They provide three tiers of content, all at different and reasonable prices.
Many cases covered on the podcast are familiar, like Nicole Brown, Heaven’s Gate, or Whitey Bulger. A majority of the cases are a medium level familiarity for anyone who’s dabbled in true crime along with cases that are next to unknown. These tend to be Christy’s and Lauren’s specialty. A particular series I find unique is titled ‘Missing’. Christy presents Lauren and the audience with a range of cases with little information available. As there’s Unsolved Mysteries.
Sticking to their roots, Lauren and Christy have covered the two newest seasons of Netflix’s Unsolved Mysteries.
At the end of an episode, Lauren (and when they occasionally reverse positions, Christy) goes over the diligent notes she’s taken, often with the loving interruption of one or multiple pets. The pair spend half an hour discussing the case and theories they’ve come up with for the unsolved episodes. Lauren often gives her “psychologist’s hat” opinion. As she reminds the listeners, she does not have a degree, only a history of true crime fascination.
In conclusion, True Crime and Cocktails is a podcast anyone can listen to if they’re interested in getting more true crime into their brains. In my opinion, you won’t be able to listen to any other true crime podcast without feeling like you’d rather hear it from your Canadian, quirky friends. The oldest episodes may be a little rougher to get into especially if those are the ones you chose to start with, but soon enough, the two get their stride and have grown a podcast that I anxiously wait for every Tuesday morning.
#true crime and cocktails#true crime#blog review#podcast#podcast review#lauren ash#canadian podcast#must listen
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REVIEW: Chris and Nancy - The True Story of the Benoit Murder-Suicide and Pro Wrestling's Cocktail of Death (2009)
A Book by Irvin Muchnick
The day I learned about the tragic events involving professional wrestler Chris Benoit and his family is etched vividly in my memory. Initially, the word was that somehow Chris and his family had all died, and it hit my like a ton of bricks – Chris had long been one of my absolute favorite wrestlers for a long while. Gathering with my friends, all lifelong wrestling…
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#2007#2009#and#benoit#book#book review#chris#cocktail#conspiracy#crime#Death#Games#murder#murder-suicide#nancy#pro#pro wrestling#Review#story#tabloid#the#true#true crime#Wrestling#wrestling&8217;s
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A leaked list of some of the exciting upcoming content from The Book of Bill:
The pyramids of Giza ranked from most to least sexy.
Winning lottery numbers. He does not say which game they're for.
Three pages of Bill practicing blackletter calligraphy so that he can write the fancy-looking "The Book of Bill" on the cover. (Meant to tear those pages out before submitting book to publisher.)
A section where he implies that all your headcanons about him are stupid. Yes, your headcanons specifically. If you compare your copy of the book to a friend's, these sections will have different text. He insults all headcanons equally, even the ones that contradict each other.
A long, rambling story about a funny thing that he saw at a party in the Nightmare Realm, but he keeps getting distracted gossiping about the embarrassing love affairs and crimes against reality the partygoers have committed. Not a single one of these characters has ever been mentioned before or ever will be again. He gets so distracted he never finishes the original funny story. He was clearly drunk when he wrote this section.
A pet care sheet on how to keep a pet axolotl. All of the information is extremely wrong.
Some of the other dimensions he's tried and failed to conquer. He keeps insisting that all the failures were somebody else's fault. It's extremely obvious that they're his fault.
A photograph of a vivisected elephant, for some reason.
A phone number written on a cocktail napkin that Bill insists would be really funny for all the readers to prank call. It leads to the desk phone of the director of the CIA.
Bill claims he definitely totally knew that Stan was disguised as Ford the whole time, he only played along to trick the Pines back, and then he quickly changes the topic.
A page of Bill's original poetry. It's all unintelligible symbols. It will take 27 years for somebody to crack the code. They're all gory but juvenile limericks.
A cocktail recipe. It will kill you.
Bill's original version of the portal blueprints that he copied to give Ford, with Bill's handwritten annotations. One part of the blueprints is labeled "component that will accidentally destroy the universe. REMEMBER NOT TO INCLUDE THIS COMPONENT IN SIXER'S COPY!!" He underlined this twice. If this page is compared to the portal blueprints in Journal 3, it's clear that Bill included that component in Ford's copy.
A personality quiz to help you meet your ideal sleep paralysis demon.
Bill's baby pictures. He looks exactly the same, except his bow tie and top hat are too big.
Bill reveals that he thought the llama symbol on the zodiac wheel referred to that farmer guy on the edge of town, and he was super confused to see Pacifica there.
Multiple pages scattered through the book about Bill's amazing powers, his brilliant and fun plans for our dimension, and all the cool favors he's willing and able to do for his friends and followers. All these pages end with a passive-aggressive aside about how somebody would have to be REALLY stupid to turn down an invitation to join Bill's crew, Stanford Pines—
A page labeled "My loyal servants and slaves!" filled with several hideous, oozing, nightmare-inducing Lovecraftian monsters, and one Mickey Mouse.
A self-portrait depicting Bill riding a rocket ship playing an electric guitar while rainbow lightning flashes all around him and money rains down from the sky.
A cynical, sneering tirade about how love is evolution's idiotic way of tricking primitive species into reproducing and how only simple-minded mortals who can't separate their true thoughts from their hormones fall for it. In the margins he's drawn a heart around the words "Bill Cipher +" a scribbled-out blot. The blot is completely unreadable. Despite this, the fandom will spend years debating the name underneath based on the size of the blot.
Extremely stupid "explanations" about various unsolved mysteries and crimes. In six years the world will discover one of them is accidentally correct and Alex Hirsch will get investigated by the FBI.
The book will be divided into four sections. Each section will begin with a big illuminated letter. In order, the four illuminated letters spell "F" "U" "C" "K".
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Dog Sitting Gone Wrong. | Z.CL
— Prologue: “You hired a babysitter for your dog?” + “Daughter actually, she’s my daughter.”
— Summary: You were hired by a rich man to babysit his daughter, when you arrive you realise his daughter is a dog and you’re now dog sitting while he is out running errands.
— Genre: SMUT. Kind of Crack and Fluffy too. There is literally no Chenle smut on this platform this is a crime. Daegal is mentioned here hehe. Y/n has a slight fear of dogs. Chenle’s literally the best single dog dad ever. Things get very spicy in the kitchen… Kitchen sex, praising and use of the term ‘Pretty Slut’ in the fic.
— Notes: I love this concept I feel so proud coming up with it.
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When you heard you’re hired by a rich anonymous man to babysit his kid you didn’t mean you were going to baby sit a freaking white dog that’s now sitting on the floor looking at you like you’re some burglar ready to be gnawed.
The rich man himself didn’t specify but you’re pretty sure he wrote to you a message that contains ‘daughter’ and not a ‘dog’ in the text so now you’re confused if this is the right man. You’re doubting your eyes right now too.
Who in the world hire a babysitter to look after their dog? It’s like he’s purposely trolling you but when Chenle saw your daze expression mixing in like a cocktail at a party event he realised your expression was actually true and you seem confused.
You look at the handsome man with white-ish platinum hair and beautiful pale skin matching the colour of his hair. It makes him look like a real size fairy. Your eyes spoke a lot more than your brain could ever comprehend right now because zero words can describe what you want to say.
“Where is your daughter?” You ask deadpanning at the man.
Chenle looks back at you as if it wasn’t freaking obvious it’s not like Daegal is hard to miss is she? He points his gaze down at the fluff ball in front of your figure and your eyes meet with the dog again. She really didn’t seem to like you, in fact every time you look at her Daegal seems to be sinking her teeth or at least imagining she is sinking her teeth into you.
He points out bluntly now. “Right there, that’s her.”
You want to laugh. Actually you’re not sure if you should laugh or if you should cry. You forgot to mention, you’re freaking terrified of dogs. You’ve always been terrified of dogs and heck you’re now forced to look after one? You’re not sure if the money is worth it anymore but then you remember how much he’s willing to pay you and you stand your ground; maybe the money is so worth it.
Your gaze turns back to Chenle away from his dog now. “You hired a babysitter for your dog?” You said with a confused trial you’re trying so hard not to offend this man, you are in his freaking mansion after-all. However you like to admit his house is pretty damn fancy and modern. Everything looks designed based on his own taste.
If only you were this rich that you can afford a babysitter for your own pet. Heck. He’s paying a lot of money to dog-sit this animal and you’re terrified by the idea of it.
Chenle seems to quip in to interrupt and cut you off when you called his daughter a dog. Of course he knows Daegal is a dog but she’s much more than that to him and he didn’t really like the tone you used either when saying how he hired a babysitter.
“Daughter actually, she’s my daughter.” Chenle points out to you with a little glare and you found yourself nervously sweating.
He seems pretty darn serious and protective of this small harmless dog right? Surely she is harmless. Well you hope she is because if she comes any closer to you and bites you, you might actually cry.
“Right… and I’m Shakira.” You say under your breath now sarcastically although you made sure that Chenle couldn’t hear you at all.
You turn to Daegal and then to Chenle again as you speak with a little sigh. You have no choice but to accept this situation. The money is big, you should survive a few hours and just dip to get the money after.
“So how long will you be out doing your errands?” You now ask him as you change the topic conversation around.
You need to know how long you’re going to be stuck with this dangerous beast in the house.
Chenle spoke back casually leaving you off guard. “I’ll be back at 9.50pm.” You stare at the man with widen eyes. What? That late!?
You’re left wondering what on earth does this man have to do that he’s gone for full thirteen freaking hours leaving you alone with his dog that he claims to be his daughter. Was this man even worth it? Can you stand being in this house before your own panic attack comes and says hello to you and murders you? It’s either going to be your own anxiety killing you or this bloody dog in front of you growling at each step you make with your feet.
You let out a little nervous laugh. “Haha… no problem. Yep. I can handle it.”
But the money? It’s a literal jackpot. You need it.
Chenle gives you a smile when you said you can handle it as you try to hide your doubts away from this man, all because he’s freaking loaded. Oh the things you do for money is insane. Chenle grabs his coat from the cloak hanger and puts it on. He then turns to you once more and gives you long list of instructions to do.
It seems like he put up a whole list that you can do for Daegal if anything comes up.
Which makes you nervous, why does he need a long ass list? You hate to admit but this dog lives better than you.
“Okay so Daegal likes cold waters, do not use the hot water. You need to groom her with delicate oils and brush, remember this. You can’t give her too many treats or else she might get fat I don’t want her to be too big.”
You stare into the open space as he said many more things that you will need to do for this dog and it’s almost like she’s human to him. It makes you wonder how can this dog be so pampered and loved while you have to work a 9 to 5 shift babysitting and now you’re stuck with a dog that by the way you have a rational fear of dogs; no matter the size or the breed. You’re just scared of them from very bad experiences when your childhood was going on.
You heard Chenle’s voice break off as he calls you out into reality. “Y/n you with me? Did you get everything I said to you?” He now asked you and your eyes move to watch him again and you clear your voice.
“Uh yeah, i got everything don’t worry.” You now said and nod giving him a little approval expression because you just gotta fake it till you make it right now. There’s no way you’ll remember everything he just listed on.
“Okay good, I’ll see you later. Just give me a call if you need to know anything.”
The door opens and you watch the man leave which then leaves you finally alone with the enemy in the house. You slowly turn around and see little Daegal looking quite intimidating for your own good and safety. She was on her feet stomping and growling at you now a lot more and she’s threatening to jump and attack you, god knows why and god knows why you’re trembling against a small dog like her.
You feel your voice tremble and your eyes are stuck onto the white fluffy dog as she’s watching you with every corner of your movements. She saw that you’re trying to walk around her and just make a run for it and you let out soft stutters.
“G-good doggy yeah… goooooodddd doggy…” You say with a little bit of a scared tone as you then run around the corner and make a run for it now out of the corridors at the front entrance. It was like a reception area almost.
This must be the most embarrassing thing ever. You’ve never struggled to babysit before anyone. Literally all kids love you. Animals love you. So why was Daegal chasing you and barking at you across the house that you’re running away from her? She’s literally out to get you for some weird reason.
Maybe Daegal doesn’t like you specifically? Chenle never really mentioned Daegal to ever be an aggressive dog but she really don’t like you.
You stand on the couch now with a pillow protectively like a shield when Daegal caught up in the fancy large open side living room. This modern house has at least four floors you believe, it’s freaking huge and it has a basement and attic too. It’s insane how big this house was. You’re kinda thankful because you can’t believe what would happen if there was barely any space and you’re stuck in such a small house with Daegal — might be your last time alive. But this wasn’t the case. This house is pretty huge and you have enough space to run away if Daegal ever comes at you.
Daegal takes a step forward and you push the pillow in her face. “Ah! Stay back! I swear, I have a pillow I’m not afraid to use it!” You’re just threatening a dog now and you feel stupid and kind of ridiculous. This wasn’t part of your cv job application. You didn’t put ‘I love dogs’ on there because you’re terrified of them!
The next thing you know it Daegal bite the pillow and you had to retreat back like a soldier running away from the other team during a war. You jumped off the couch and went towards the kitchen now. You find dog treats in the separate container and you desperately take a few out and when you hear Daegal running around the house looking to get you.
You found her standing in front of the kitchen marble flooring and she saw the treats in your hands which made her now seem a little more distracted and calmer.
You feel relieved because you gave her at least five pieces. Somehow you have a feeling Chenle mentioned not to overfeed Daegal…? Right? Your brain was fumbled you don’t remember, you weren’t actually listening either but it doesn’t matter anymore because Daegal wasn’t chasing you around like a freaking hound ready to kill you anymore which was great on your side.
You rub the back of your neck as you sigh in relief. “Phew close one.”
Maybe you can survive a little in this house before you can find another thing ready to sabotage you and murder you.
You decided to take a few hours of just keeping away from Daegal and giving her space while you’ll be on your phone scrolling to keep yourself busy. As the hour passed another hour went by. Now you’re stuck in the space spot on the couch for four hours. The four hours turns into five hours and you feel boredom overtake your body and your legs.
You never felt so bored before on a job.
In fact you shouldn’t be on your phone like this when you are babysitting but in fact you have no idea how to deal and take care of a dog — specifically you don’t want to approach the dog at all considering your phobia of them.
But then something smashed and fell into pieces in the background from the living room and you’re left there panicking. You quickly stand up and put your phone away on the couch. Your legs rush towards the kitchen to see Daegal chewing on a bunch of tissue paper rolls now shredding them to shrewd bits and all the saliva catching on the white paper.
You feel your face fell into a dark hole resembling a black hole from space sucking everything in. You can’t help but feel like this was your fault for not paying attention to Daegal in the first place right now.
You kneel down slowly with a spatula and poke Daegal away from the toilet rolls. She barks at the spatula and backs away when you managed to successfully wipe her away from the paper.
“Ugh… Daegal your dad is gonna murder me if he knows what you’ve done right now.” You said a little bit squeamish to see the saliva on the paper. You’re going to have to start cleaning this up.
You pick up the pieces of shredded paper and start to clean the floor by wiping it away and putting the rest into the trash bin however you then witness pieces of glass, a vase more in specific, to be broken on the kitchen floor and pieces of roses laying on the floor with a pool of water flossing the kitchen.
Your mouth never fell so fast and your jaw never dislocated so fast at the sight of the mess Daegal made.
The voice comes out as scared as a doe can be when a predator was in sight. You’re no longer scared, you’re frightened by the sight of the mess. The vase looks like an antique. God it probably costs more than your fortune and house you’re renting! Daegal really was out here trying to sabotage you or something.
Never mind if Chenle was going to murder you over toilet rolls being bitten and eaten by his daughter, well he certainly is going to kill you now over this expensive vase!
“Your dad is definitely going to murder me now when he finds out about this.”
You bite your bottom lip as you start to pick up the flowers and then putting them on the counter as you pick up the vase pieces. You suck in your breath. This is going to be terrible terrible news for Chenle. God you can’t even imagine what he’s going to say. You should say goodbye to your bank account because you’re going to be in DEBT now.
And what more? Your life fortune? Wasted. Your university loan? Oh god you can say goodbye to that too.
‘Maybe I can glue this together? He won’t know right…’ You sigh trying to fix this mess up but you know Chenle isn’t stupid.
Daegal barks when she saw your sad depressing expression because you’re literally pulling at your hair over a broken vase now and well, it looks like you’re seeing your end coming. You’re saying goodbye to everything too.
Heck you’re even planning your funeral it looks like it in your head because this vase is going to cost a lot. You bet everything in this house costs so much that even the toilet paper is probably made up of silk, god knows what.
Your eyes stare back at Daegal who’s stepping on your feet trying to get your attention. “What is it? Do you have something to say huh? Look what you did!” You said lifting one singular piece of the vase to Daegal as you start to scold her for ruining something this precious.
Daegal barks back and you scowl as you found the dog to be backchatting at you. “Because of you your dad is going to give me first class ticket to heaven. Or worse maybe hell.” You announce with a dramatic sigh and put the vase back down on the kitchen counter.
She barks again and you retort your eyes at the dog who seems to be wanting to show you something. You follow now Daegal as she was pawing at a certain cabinet and you raise your eyebrow wondering what on earth was this dog trying to show you?
You open the cabinet to fiend your curiosity and when you do you see an exact replica of the vase in the cabinet. Your eyes widen staring at Daegal.
‘Was Daegal… perhaps trying to show me this replica?’ You can’t help but think this was not a coincidence.
You stand up and grab the vase filling it up with water and then putting the flowers inside. The vase was placed back into the original spot again and you hate to admit it but it looks the exact same. It looks like the incident never ever happened.
So maybe you won’t be dying today.
The broken pieces of the previous vase would be thrown in the plastic bag and hidden in the cabinet you reckon no one’s going to look for it there. You look at Daegal who looks pretty satisfied that you replaced the vase.
Technically it was Daegal’s fault it broke but maybe it’s even more of your fault for not keeping an eye on her.
You sigh giving a small pat on Daegal’s head. “You know missy, you’re not so bad after all.” You tell her and Daegal gives a little wag on the tail.
You might be able to tolerate Daegal. Your fear around her has lessened. But that doesn’t really mean your fear of dogs is gone. Maybe Daegal is slightly more tolerable to deal with. Less intimidating now than earlier when she chased you around like you’re some intruder.
As the time went on you decide to give Daegal a little shower like Chenle told you to give her. You made the bath run a little and Daegal would be pampered with all sorts of water and such. You even gave her little bubbles which Daegal was playing with.
You hate to admit but she’s a pretty cute dog. You never really see a dog chasing bubbles before up close anyways.
After the shower you dried her off into a towel and saw that her fluffy white curls were drying quickly and giving her this mane sort of thing. You can’t help but laugh and you look around the giant bathroom. It had everything looking so expensive even the bathtub was looking so expensive and antique-like. You feel like anything you touch will cost you a fortune if you break it.
Your eyes look for bottles of oils that Chenle mentioned and the hairbrush to groom them hairs that are looking a little messy. You bring Daegal on top of the bathroom counter now and you look at her brushing her ears with her paws.
“You know they say pets look like their owners, I can kinda see what they mean by that now that I’m looking at you.”
Your voice sounds like it’s teasing Daegal as you’re now rubbing the oils around her hair and you hear the dog give a little bark wagging the tail. It’s like she’s telling you to stop teasing her and what not but you can’t help it. She does really carry Chenle’s personality with her sometimes, or maybe his entire presence sometimes.
You tilt your head grabbing the hairbrush and starts to slowly brush the dog hairs. You don’t mind to pamper Daegal anymore. You really don’t mind her. At first you were scared and it was clear Daegal didn’t quite like you.
But she seems to be pretty used to you now being in the house so you suppose it went both ways; neither of you liked one another and now you’re pretty settled.
The time goes by soon enough and you see the time was reaching nearly the 9pm mark and you’re certain you and Daegal were done with the shower. You put Daegal back down and let her run around. Meanwhile you would clean out the bathroom and then leave closing the lights.
All you have to do is now wait and what not so you can get paid and then leave. But you won’t lie you feel almost empty now that you’re reaching the end of your job shift. You’re not sure why?
You lay down on the couch and you see Daegal jumping in cuddling right next to your stomach as she seems to take a good spot close to you to fall asleep. You feel yourself falling into dreamland yourself too. Your eyelids feel heavy and you let them close to the darkness. The dreamland was calling you and you accept the sleepiness you’re feeling and so on. Your body goes down into light slumbers and with Daegal fast asleep next to you.
The time you two slept together in this position you were left feeling the most safe. You don’t usually feel this safe and you take a while to fall asleep but all it took you was to cuddle with Daegal to make you feel so sleepy that you forgot you were even falling asleep in the first place.
By the time it goes by now Chenle came home and he wonders why the house was so suspiciously quiet?
The man takes off the shoes and his jacket back to the cloak hanger and he looks around not even seeing a sign of his dog who usually comes towards the door or waits at the door for him to arrive home. When he came forward searching now in panic all of that vanished and dissolves like raindrops falling into a large pool of submerged water the minute his eyes found you and Daegal curled up sleeping together. He stops in front of the couch and lets out a surprise sigh.
He really thought something bad happened but this was surprisingly quite wholesome? Daegal never really sleeps with anyone else but Chenle. She isn’t quite fond of other people.
But she seems pretty fond of you.
Chenle moves his hand to shake your shoulders a little and your lips fell apart letting out a tiny little sigh from the groggy tiredness and your eyes open seeing Chenle’s handsome face in front of you. You slowly get up and you see Daegal is still fast asleep.
Your soft sigh as you woke up made Chenle admire you and actually he found you pretty cute when you’re asleep. “Oh… when did you get back?” You now ask a little question as you slowly begin to stand up as you leave Daegal resting on the couch.
“A few minuets ago.” Chenle explains back in reply. He follows you to the kitchen so you guys can speak a little more clearly. He finds the house to be clean and nothing to be wrong.
It looks like you handled babysitting his daughter well.
Chenle trails looking at the vase, he smiles at the flowers. “Ah good they’re blooming.” He said a little proud that the petals are blooming and you clear your voice looking away from the vase.
“Sooo, did I do a good job babysitting?” You now said wanting some validation, you know it doesn’t hurt to know if you did well or not.
Chenle looks up amused when you’re not clearly seeking some praise and he watches your eyes linger on him with little red cheeks as you feel the eye contact make you start to look flustered a little. Chenle really has a strong gaze that puts this invisible grip around your neck. Although you like it you do, it’s something no one else has over you and only Chenle. Yet you only met him today and spoke to him few times you feel some unbelievably high tension between the both of you.
He takes a step closer and you feel Chenle’s arms putting on the sides of the counter that you’re leaning against now. Chenle’s face moves a little closer to your face to speak.
“You want some praise, is that it?” Chenle now asked you and you give a little nod as your eyes couldn’t be anymore obvious you’re literally eyeing this man’s lips like they’re the only thing you want to look at. “Yeah… doesn’t hurt to hear it…” You tell him softly and he smirks leaning closer.
“Good job, Y/n.” Chenle said reconnecting lips against yours now as he kissed you a little more powerfully than he at first imagine he would. Never in your mind have you thought you’d be making out with a rich man you babysat his daughter for him. You feel a violent connection in your stomach explode like fireworks.
You loved to though. The praise he gave you when he said good job. You kiss him back now even more with your hands connecting to his face as your body was lifted on the kitchen countertop. Chenle ran his hands up against your thighs.
You feel his tongue work his way with your tongue letting them dance as if they were fire and ice. You feel your mouths move on the side some more and you tilt your head even more, Chenle’s fingers pinch at your thighs through your jeans and he rubs and squeezed then too liking how they were feeling so soft and squishy.
You let out a little groan when Chenle connects your lips into another hungry kiss when he pulled away only momentarily to keep you gasping and wanting him even more. He really knows how to play you like a fiddle. You’re growing weak and weaker the more he kisses you. You’re growing addicted.
Your breathes were panting and your voices were singing practically from how good the kiss feels and feeds on your urges to do even more. Chenle’s hands didn’t take a minute to slide his hands at your back undoing the strap between your bras as he kissed you even more.
The shirt and the bra fell off and Chenle enjoys how your breasts were already a little tight on the top. He kissed them down gently and then he saw your arms on the side take off his shirt pulling it off his body. Chenle lets you strip him clean and you connect your mouths again.
It’s like kissing wasn’t enough but you guys keep on kissing and kissing. He’s addicted to you and you’re addicted to him. That was exactly what it was.
But even if you’re addicted and you’re close enough, but you can’t get anymore closer because you’re literally pinned against each other as Chenle ran his tongue across your neck and down to your breasts licking and teasing them with his teeth, you’re practically begging to be under his skin, because you wanna be so close you’re literally as one thing. Chenle feels the eagerness inside him grow even more.
“Oh good gracious… god…”
You let out as your head leans back when Chenle cups his hands over your wet cunt as the cold countertop made the sensation even more intense and difficult to handle.
Chenle slips himself inside taking the chances now or never. He never once thought he would be fucking someone in his own kitchen, as well as that someone being the babysitter he hired. But oh well? Chenle can’t say it’s a bad thing because you made him growing hard and hard behind measures so now he’s going to relive this experience with you.
And you’re enjoying yourself he can tell when you let out a soft smile when he kissed your neck, he heard a little giggle it looks like you’re ticklish on that side and he found that quite cute of you.
“You ticklish over there?” He says softly as he brushed his lips on the same spot that made you laugh quietly.
“Yeah…” Your voice says in response was you let out a soft groan when Chenle was at the same time slowly sinking into your pussy putting in his length in the hole as you’re feeling everything become tighter and squeezing out while at the same time he’s stretching you clean.
Chenle gives him a little smirk kissing the same ticklish spot on your neck. “You know you’re pretty cute.” He tells you as he rubs your back with his hands. One hand stays on your back while the other rests on top of your thigh, you feel him keeping his hands there and you blush when he compliments you like this.
He thinks you’re cute? You feel flattered and shy.
Chenle kissed down your lips again and he loves that he made you glow red on your face, he enjoys your reactions. His pelvis slowly moves and you groan in the kiss. He can see your vibrations from your voice creek in and he swallows them all as he keeps on kissing you while he’s now starting to slowly thrust inside you.
Your lips quiver when Chenle pulls away from the kiss and you finally groan at the motions as Chenle’s focusing on thrusting in and out of you as he keeps you in place on the countertop in the kitchen. Your bodies were pushing up on one another and you feel so delicate while floating with the pleasure.
It feels like nothing you’ve quite experienced before.
But you like it a lot and you don’t want it to end. Chenle’s thrusts makes you feel like you’re floating in the sky and around without any worry in your head.
You’re enjoying this a lot more than you anticipated and it turns you on so much as Chenle’s eyes never leave your face. He seems to enjoy the eye contact and you’re staring at him resembling like a deer on the road with headlights.
He enjoys the little trembling pupils he sees in front of him and he kissed you sweetly as he runs your hair back from your face, the thrusts only pick up the pace but his kisses were so slow placed.
Chenle wants to take a picture of your flushed face everytime he thrusts inside you so deep he sees that your own mind was breaking apart because of him. Chenle will take a forever photogenic memory of this and he will always look back on it because you’re the most beautiful person he laid eyes upon this close while he’s taking you in his own kitchen.
The situation itself at hand was exciting him because he’s not usually the person to sleep with someone he met on first day. But he has a feeling you’re different. He whispers down admiring you even closer. He kissed your ticklish spot again and you flinch with groans flowing past your teeth. “You’re so pretty, pretty slut, you know that Y/n?”
You stutter out breathless. “P-pretty? Really… oh god…” you cave in when Chenle leans even deeper inside you as he tugs on your inner thighs squeezing them with his free one hand on top of your thigh.
“Mhmm… so pretty. No wonder Daegal likes you.” He whispers as he kissed your lips once again and Chenle feels himself getting closer and closer to an exit. You found yourself jerking forward against his thrusts now as your orgasm was at the door and Chenle was pumping you with full of himself inside your beautiful walls that take his shape.
You raise your eyes to the ceiling above at the bright shining lights blinding you now and you lift your arms putting one at Chenle’s shoulder as he’s cramping your bodies together.
Your highs were chased at the end together, he feels you release right after he did and your ears pick up on his low voice growing out.
Chenle takes a moment to take a look at your face again and he gives you a little smirk when he saw your eyes already looking at him, like you’re admiring how beautiful he looks too.
“I already transferred the money to your bank.” He said back and he rubs your cheek with his inner thumb.
“I’ll keep paying you the same amount if you become my permanent dog sitter. What do you say y/n?”
You never expected this job to go this way. But you found yourself agreeing to the deal, and somehow you just know this Dog Sitting Gone Wrong.
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@onyourhyuck please refer from translating copyrighting and plagiarising my work thank youu. Reblog this fic and follow me for more updates it helps a girl out!! <3
#nct fanfiction#nct smut#nct x reader#nct u scenarios#nct hard hours#nct series#nct fic#nct recs#nct scenarios#chenle#chenle hard hours#chenle fanfic#nct dream smut#nct u smut#nct imagines#nct 127 smut#nct dream hard hours#nct dream hard thoughts#nct chenle#kpop smut#nct fanfic#nct moodboard#nct masterlist#nct masterpost#nct dream fluff#nct dream fanfic#nct 127 hard hours#nct 127 hard thoughts#nct drabbles#chenle drabbles
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Henchwomen Through the Ages
The "ages" of comics are not hard and fast things, and even comic book historians argue where they begin and end. They're more like moods than time periods, and your standard game of Henchwoman RPG will probably be set in a vague time period that could be anywhere from the thirties to today with an overall Silver Age mood. Still, let's take a look at how the roll of the Henchwoman has evolved, shall we?
Goldie is a gun-toting, cigar-chomping bank robber in victory rolls and a bullet bra. She's not called a henchwoman- she's called "Look out, that broad has a grenade!" She's loyal to the boss despite his dumb penny gimmick, but if he ever finked on her in court, he wouldn't live to see the sunrise. There's no Henchwomen's Union for her to join yet, but she's provided muscle for plenty of mob-backed unions. Goldie can't afford to be soft on heroes since they'd be just as happy to throw her off a roof as to arrest her, but she might be wooed by an appeal to patriotism- she ain't no Nazi rat! Her hobbies include matinee shows, swing dancing, and blasting coppers.
Sylvia is a competitive surfer and was a cocktail waitress until they fired her for slapping too many customers. Thanks to the newly formed Henchwomen's Union, she's treated much better by her current job, which usually involves crashing parties to steal themed jewelry. She and the heroes she fights have an understanding- they'll never be rough with her, and she won't check up on them after putting them in a death trap to see if they've died. On her off hours, she can go dancing in the same outfit she worked in- a silver jumpsuit, gogo boots and a purely decorative motorcycle helmet.
Brawny is a member of the Sisterhood of Wicked Witches, and she fights for a cause- or rather, several causes. These range from the reasonable (Save the whales!) to the less reasonable (A free ray gun for every child!) The Henchwomen's Union is strong enough to get her good pay, so many of her problems are philosophical- is she a good guy or a bad guy, and what do good and bad even mean? Brawny has to be a bit more careful than she would have been ten years ago, since death may well stick- but that also means she might really kill a hero, at least for a while, and that's what matters!
Tenebra prefers to be called a Dark Muse, a member of a vampire circle dedicated to bringing art to life, painted in colors of blood. Her eyeliner is swirly and her gowns are velvet, and she wears them onstage in her sideline darkwave band. Tenebra arranges her crimes in accordance with pre-raphaelite imagery, with victims displayed in heartbreakingly beautiful and mythologically-influenced poses. Her boss may technically be the Queen of the Vampires, and she may have a card with the Henchwomen's Union, but her true loyalty is to art itself.
Ferra is a mercenary with a separate pouch for each type of bullet, and she has a lot of types of bullet. Her stilettos are tall but her hair is taller, and she can strike intimidating poses that would break a normal person's back. The Henchwomen's Union had its own back broken by the bosses, and is now more of informal underground thing, but it still hooks her up with real deal bad guys. She'll kill without a second thought for her boss, but she's only one bad day away from turning her gun on him. It might even happen accidentally, since he and the heroes dress exactly the same. Ferra somehow has a heavy metal soundtrack even when there's no music playing.
Ally got a degree in psychology but until she can afford grad school, she gigs as a henchwoman. Her bosses are sillicon valley dickheads, but the first one to offer her real benefits will have her loyalty for life. Thanks to the resurgence of the Henchwomen's Union, Ally gets to wear big stompy boots instead of high heels, but she still has to wear a big day-glo logo on her leather jacket that might as well be a target sign. Her hobbies include pop culture conventions, smoking weed and credit card fraud.
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So it came to my attention a couple of weeks back that the version of Stealing the Elf-King's Roses that until recently was available over at Ebooks Direct had somehow managed to evade being updated using the cutting-edge Vellum ebook software, when we were doing all the other books in the store.
I have no idea how this happened. Anyway, I've been taking care of that update, and the book will be available again in a day or three.
Meanwhile I'm having the usual conniptions over new cover art and font choices. Fantasy covers these days need to have one or another of a group of very specific looks. So do SF covers. And when you have a novel that splits the difference between the genres (or bashes them together...) the way this one does—as STEKR is an alternate-Earth police procedural—it can seem impossible to get it right. You don't want to leave people who're buying-at-a glance feeling, later on, that they thought they were getting one thing and were sold something else.
The art above is okay enough to go forward with. (Though I'd feel better if I could get Lee something a little more like her judicial robes and less like a "little black [cocktail] dress".) The real problem right now, though, is the font choice.
After some consideration I grabbed the one above from Derek Murphy's fabulous DIY cover site. (Simply because how could I not try a font called The Princess And The Frog?...) But I'm going to go back tomorrow or the next day and try using a much more SF-looking font, and see how that comes out. Who knows... maybe when it's in the store again, we'll offer both cover versions and see what people prefer.
Anyway, this is just an early warning for those of you here who may have picked up the book earlier (possibly as part of our whole store bundle*). When the updated book goes live, you're entitled to be updated to the new version of STEKR, with its improved graphics on the inside as well as the outside, if you feel like it. Just drop a note to the store's support email address, quoting your order number, and we'll refresh your download links when the book's back up in the store.
Meanwhile, for those who may not know anything about this novel: look under the cut for the description.
*Which, along with all our other bundles, is on sale at 20% off right now.
It's CSI, Jim, but not as you know it...!
Psychoforensics specialist and freelance prosecutor Lee Enfield works with the Los Angeles District Attorney’s office as a lanthanomancer—a magic-worker trained in Seeing and revealing the truth. When she and her fayhound partner Gelert are brought in to do discovery for the investigation into the murder of an Elf named Omren dil’Sorden, at first it seems an ordinary homicide: just one more hate crime in a city and culture where violence against the immensely wealthy, uncannily beautiful Alfen is becoming more and more commonplace.
But Lee and Gelert discover that there's more to this Elf's murder than meets the eye. When political pressure from above the DA's office pushes the two partners out of the investigation, Lee's unwillingness to drop the case gets her and Gelert drafted into a mission to the heart of the forbidden realm of Alfheim. Their involvement makes them targets of a shadowy conspiracy involving powerful multinationals and governments of the Eleven Worlds, intent on taking the secret of the Elves' power for themselves. Drawn into an ambivalent and potentially deadly alliance with the shadowy and much-feared Elf-King, and with the fates of entire worlds on the line, does Lee dare trust her Sight to reveal his true motives—and can the Elf-King be trusted to be on anyone's side but his own?...
This stand-alone fantasy police/legal-procedural novel by DD, originally published in 2002, is reissued exclusively here in a new edition -- revised and updated, with an afterword about the project's genesis and an appendix featuring never-before-published background material on the Eleven Worlds.
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GLASS ONION: A KNIVES OUT MYSTERY (2022) SENTENCE STARTERS
❛ You can’t keep making excuses for every one of [name]’s insane whims. ❜
❛ Genius always looks like insanity at first, though, right? ❜
❛ Hey, please stop fire-spinning inside. ❜
❛ I say it like I see it, no filter. If people can’t handle it, that’s their problem. ❜
❛ You’ve got to stay off the Twitter. ❜
❛ Are you mocking me? ❜
❛ This can’t Shazam. It’s a lamp. ❜
❛ Where’s my speargun? I gotta pack. ❜
❛ He told me you haven’t left the bath for a week. ❜
❛ My mind is a fueled-up racing car, and I got nowhere to drive it. ❜
❛ I need danger, a hunt, a challenge. ❜
❛ There’s someone here for you! With a box! ❜
❛ Hello, stranger danger. ❜
❛ Excuse me, I love your accent. I had to try it. ❜
❛ You must be very special. ❜
❛ When you throw a murder mystery party, you do it right, buddy. ❜
❛ I’m not here. ❜
❛ He’s just staying here. He’s going through things. ❜
❛ This rich-people shit is weird. ❜
❛ This is stretching my stride-taking abilities. ❜
❛ Okay, let’s stop talking and actually start hanging out and having fun. ❜
❛ Why is it on the roof? ❜
❛ I wanted to ask, what are you doing here? ❜
❛ Is this part of the game? ❜
❛ I’ve learned through bitter experience that an anonymous invitation is not to be trifled with. ❜
❛ You really try. I like that. You really make an effort. ❜
❛ You never know when shit’s gonna go down. ❜
❛ I’m uncomfortable. I’m gonna go for a swim. ❜
❛ It’s true. I say it like I see it. ❜
❛ If you want to shake things up, you start with something small. ❜
❛ That’s the place where you have to look within yourself and ask, “Am I the kind of person who will keep going?” ❜
❛ That was some real red-pill stuff. ❜
❛ Every single one of you is holding on for dear life to [name]’s golden titties. ❜
❛ Wow. That was so real. ❜
❛ I’m a truth-teller. Some people can’t handle it. ❜
❛ It’s a dangerous thing to mistake speaking without thought for speaking the truth. Don’t you think? ❜
❛ Are you calling me dangerous? ❜
❛ A few cocktails before I’m murdered. ❜
❛ Halle Berry! That has a kick. ❜
❛ This simple thing that you thought you were looking at, it suddenly takes on layers and depth so complex, it gives you vertigo. ❜
❛ Every time we’ve gotten to the point where I’m going to strangle you, you pull something like this, and it’s magic. ❜
❛ I wanna be responsible for something that gets mentioned in the same breath as the Mona Lisa. ❜
❛ This is reckless. And you’re gonna get somebody killed. ❜
❛ It’s been a memorable weekend already, to be sure, but now the real fun starts. ❜
❛ Tonight, in this very room, a murder will be committed. ❜
❛ Well, to be clear, I mean, I didn’t know what a “blood diamond” was so… ❜
❛ What am I supposed to do now? Play Yahtzee all weekend? ❜
❛ I like the Glass Onion as a metaphor. An object that seems densely layered, but in reality the center is in plain sight. ❜
❛ It’s like putting a loaded gun on the table and turning off the lights! ❜
❛ Well, I’m out of here. Tomorrow morning. Gone. ❜
❛ You’re murdering my vibe. ❜
❛ So you come here, in your Gucci flats, telling us that we owe you? ❜
❛ What do you want? A check? You want performative pity? ❜
❛ I want the truth! ❜
❛ But me, I’m tired of pretending like you’re the victim in this game. ❜
❛ That changes things, right? ❜
❛ Have we ever not pulled through? Pulled it off? ❜
❛ We won’t know the cause of death without an autopsy. ❜
❛ Listen, I must insist that nobody touch the body or disturb anything around it. ❜
Are you treating this as a crime scene then? ❜
❛ I’ll pay you one billion dollars to tell me which one of them tried to kill me. ❜
❛ Oh, fiddlesticks. ❜
❛ Is that a speargun? ❜
❛ Oh, hell’s bells! Just, everybody, just stay here! ❜
❛ I can peel back the layers, I can take it to a point, but what lies at the center, only one person can tell us who killed [name]. ❜
❛ You’re not in the bath again, are you? ❜
❛ Heavens, the dog ate the caviar again. ❜
❛ It’s a stupid idea, right? ❜
❛ Listen, I want to be clear, huh? I am not Batman. ❜
❛ Any feelings of reverence or respect that you had for me when you crossed my threshold, buttress those feelings now. ❜
❛ Yeah, I’m trying real hard to buttress, but this sounds nuts. ❜
❛ Is this safe? ❜
❛ I shouldn’t be here. This is nuts. But I’m here. So let’s do this. ❜
❛ The reality-distortion field ends here. I can’t let you do this. ❜
❛ Look me in the eye! You know it’s a lie! ❜
❛ You must be really great at Clue, huh? ❜
❛ I’m very bad at dumb things. My Achilles’ heel. ❜
❛ This is your last chance to back out. ❜
❛ I think it’s really shitty what they all did to you. ❜
❛ I sold my soul for this. ❜
❛ I thought you said you didn’t drink? ❜
❛ That’s hard kombucha. That’s Jared Leto’s hard kombucha. ❜
❛ We’re running out of time! ❜
❛ Please. Think of the danger here. You gotta step back and let me handle this. ❜
❛ I never email anything that I wouldn’t want to see on the front page of The Times. ❜
❛ I think maybe you should take up drinking. You’re just killing it. ❜
❛ Something is just teasing the edge of my brain. ❜
❛ Oh, if I ever meet Jared Leto, I’m gonna whoop his kombucha-brewing ass. ❜
❛ My therapist says this is a toxic relationship. ❜
❛ We will do what we always do. Deny, half-apologize, and then go silent awhile. ❜
❛ Please tell me you did not think sweatshops are where they make sweatpants. ❜
❛ I will do whatever I have to do to save myself, and he is my only lifeline. ❜
❛ This never happens in Clue. ❜
❛ He’s a son of a bitch. Leave his ass. ❜
❛ I don’t feel sorry for him. He deserved what he got, and you are better off without him. ❜
❛ Please don’t kill me! Oh my God, please don’t kill me! ❜
❛ I’m not trying to kill you, you crazy bitch! ❜
❛ Shitballs! ❜
❛ It hides not behind complexity, but behind mind-numbing obvious clarity. ❜
❛ A veritable minefield of malapropisms and factual errors. ❜
❛ Oh, please. Just tell us who tried to kill me. ❜
❛ Nobody tried to kill you, you vainglorious buffoon. ❜
❛ What is reality?! ❜
❛ Does he keep a vial of poison in his tooth or something? Is that a rich person thing? ❜
❛ Oh, it’s so dumb, it’s brilliant. ❜
❛ No! It’s just dumb! ❜
❛ You dim-witted, brainless jackass! ❜
❛ Your one murder, with any panache at all, and you stole the whole idea from me. ❜
❛ Wow! We got some big accusations flying around here. ❜
❛ You need evidence, and you’ve got nothing. ❜
❛ Anywhere you go, it’s going to be your word against mine. How do you think that’s gonna go? ❜
❛ There’s nothing I can do. Except maybe offer you some courage. ❜
❛ I hope your little bitch tantrum gave you closure ’cause it accomplished nothing! ❜
❛ You’re ruined. ❜
❛ Did you get the son of a bitch? ❜
#rp meme#sentence starters#rp sentence meme#sentence meme#rp prompt#roleplay meme#roleplay prompts#sentence starter meme#rp memes#rp prompts#*Movie
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•Being in a Relationship with Desire•
It should come as no surprise that being with Desire is a handful.
What with their constant scheming and "up to no good" state of being.
They're the type to start filling you in on their devious, naughty plans over morning coffee and not stop until well into cocktail hour.
You knew what you signed up for though and it does please you how willingly they are to share every part of their ideas with you.
And they do fully. They will never lie to you or keep you out of the loop. You're their partner, in every way. From partner in life to partner in crime.
Can you imagine having Desire's full attention upon you? What it feels like to receive true, everlasting love from the anthropomorphic personification of desire?
They embody lust, craving, wanting and attraction so to have all those bewitching traits focused on you is like being put under a spell.
When Desire feels love and lust towards you, which is honestly all they feel besides a dash of trickery, it is an overwhelming experience.
There have been many times where a simple kiss from them brings you to your knees or a mere golden eyed glance has made you nearly faint.
Their voice makes your heart beat nearly out of your chest, their body makes you tremble and brings you the greatest form of pleasure anyone could ever know.
They are entirely devoted to you. At your beck and call. Making it their personal goal to get you anything and everything you could possibly desire.
You are spoiled rotten by them. They even created new rooms and places in the Threshold to suit your tastes, your fancies, your hobbies, etc.
They keep you close to them at all times and when you're within reach, they will be touching you in some way or another.
Softly running their manicured fingers through your hair, absently tracing any bare skin you may be showing, leaving little pecks here and there on your cheeks and neck, if only to mark you with their lipstick.
They like you on their lap, your body touching theirs so that they may see and feel the constant effect they have upon you.
So they can bear witness to the rhythm of your heart, the warmth of your skin, the color of your blush...
They are utterly faithful to you and attentive, knowing your wants and desires even before the thought occurs to you.
They are extremely protective, going as far as to not let you out of their sight unless absolutely necessary.
See, they know that because of how they interfere in their siblings lives that they are not popular amongst the Endless and should the others seek revenge, they know all too well how you are a liability.
Their eternal love for you could make you a target and they will not stand to have you be put in danger.
They will take you anywhere you want to go, in their realm, in the human world, in the universe so long as they are there beside you.
To have Desire's love feels like a never ending enchantment and the "honeymoon phase" never leaves.
Your days are filled with luxury, pleasure and allure.
It almost feels like a trance but with a life this good you hope never to awaken from this magic.
To have won Desire's heart is no mean feat and yet they have given it to you, figuratively and literally.
They are yours and you are forever and ever theirs.
#the sandman#the sandman netflix#the sandman tv#the sandman desire#desire#desire of the endless#desire of the endless x reader#desire x reader smut#desire x reader#desire imagines#desire headcanons#desire headcanon#the sandman x reader smut#the sandman x reader#the sandman imagine#the sandman headcanon#the sandman headcanons#the sandman fanfic
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Hello,
You mention some podcast you love once in a while and I gotta tell you they are usually very good recs and have made me discover some great ones. Do you have a rec list somewhere, or a few podcasts you'd like to give a shoutout to ?
Thanks a lot !
Sure! I don't have a rec list, but I'll make one now here of what's in my general rotation (or was, if it's a limited series):
Ongoing
Behind the Bastards (https://www.iheart.com/podcast/105-behind-the-bastards-29236323/) A podcast about the worst people in all of history, hosted by Robert Evans (former war correspondent and Cracked.com writer). My current binge-listen, it's highly engaging on some of the most difficult to process subject matter there is, that being human atrocities and the people who commit them. It's a deep dive into the history and background of these people that in every case that reminds us that all too often "history's greatest monsters"...are just people. (As a note, Evans acknowledges fucked-up things as fucked up, but he doesn't pretend they didn't occur)
This Podcast Will Kill You (https://thispodcastwillkillyou.com/) A podcast about diseases and epidemiology, as well as other medical mysteries. Each episode will go over the biology of a disease or condition, the history of it, and the current state of where we stand with it in the world. Also, each episode comes with an original cocktail and mocktail recipe.
Criminal (https://thisiscriminal.com/) The only true crime podcast I listen to, hosted by Phoebe Judge, the woman with the most soothing podcast voice ever. It's a podcast about crime, but unlike a lot of true crime podcasts, it's just as likely to be a story about the victim or the people caught in the middle as it is the actual perpetrator.
5-4 (https://www.fivefourpod.com/) "A podcast about how much the Supreme Court sucks." Three lawyers dissect and analyze SCOTUS cases, and not just present ones, that illustrate just how reactionary and adversarial the Court has been throughout almost all it's history.
Noble Blood (https://www.grimandmild.com/nobleblood) Host Dana Schwartz takes you on a trip each episode into the lives, bad decisions, and usually very bloody ends of many of history's royals and nobility.
You're Wrong About (https://yourewrongabout.com/) Events, people, and phenomenon from the semi-recent past that have been miscast in the public understanding. From McDonalds Hot Coffee to Princess Diana to Sinead O'Connor. Also you'll probably learn more about the Satanic Panic than you ever thought about before.
If Books Could Kill (https://www.ifbookspod.com/) Does the idea of "two hosts ripping into really terrible nonfiction bestsellers that have causes some really harmful ideas to spread" sound entertaining? Because that's pretty much what this is. You're not going to look at airport books the same way again.
Queer as Fact (https://www.queerasfact.com/) Four Australian historians explore queer historical topics and figures from all over the world and from different time periods. The research is often damn good, especially considering how thin on the ground sources can be, and they take pains to not limit themselves to the usual Eurocentric view of history.
99% Invisible (https://99percentinvisible.org/) Probably the longest-running podcast in my rotation, host Roman Mars and crew say it's a podcast about design. It's probably more accurate to say it's about the design and impact of the things we don't usually see or think about, the little things we take for granted that have been designed and developed and have had a profound impact on people's lives, in both the hyperlocal and global sense.
Limited Series
Ars Paradoxica (https://arsparadoxica.com/) Sci-fi audio serial drama. Time-travel, the Cold War, secret agencies, and human choices.
The Big Dig (https://www.wgbh.org/podcasts/the-big-dig) 9-ep series produced by GBH hosted by Ian Coss about how Boston's Big Dig happened. It's also about American infrastructure and politics, and how the local sometimes is the national.
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Can we get the INS and outs list for 2024?
2024 ins & outs
IN:
- [ ] buying stupid things but not useless things
- [ ] lounging around for hours at a time
- [ ] drinking enough water
- [ ] treating your sims storylines like your favorite show
- [ ] skipping during a long walk
- [ ] keeping lists (not necessarily useful ones)
- [ ] watching reality tv and caring deeply about it
- [ ] texting back
- [ ] trying new recipes and using the full fat, the real butter, & feeling completely neutral
- [ ] asking people you know to hang out without embarrassment
- [ ] carrying a book with you in case you have to wait in a line or something
- [ ] earnest love songs
- [ ] lending books and not caring if they find their way back
- [ ] picking up coffee for your coworkers
- [ ] wearing clothes for comfort first and foremost
- [ ] seeking therapy
- [ ] letting your comfort movie be incredibly violent and horrific and being okay with it
- [ ] trying new things and being okay with them making you anxious
- [ ] showing a little leg
- [ ] taking plenty of pictures and printing them physically
- [ ] book clubs
OUT:
- [ ] celebrity crushes
- [ ] pop music that sounds like it belongs in a cw show
- [ ] podcasts hosted by men
- [ ] colin jost
- [ ] mocktails costing the same as cocktails (it’s just juice!)
- [ ] mocking girls for not wearing makeup
- [ ] giving babies ipads
- [ ] “hot girl” anything
- [ ] caring (or worse, participating) in online discourse
- [ ] dwelling
- [ ] “girl math”
- [ ] true crime
- [ ] starbucks
- [ ] getting upset when the cashiers at trader joes engage w you
- [ ] watching new tv shows or movies
- [ ] the eras tour (i’m not going this year)
- [ ] tattoos with specific meaning
- [ ] “forgetting” to eat
- [ ] haircuts
- [ ] instagram account for your baby
- [ ] not having a personal sense of self or style and making it everyone else’s problem
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Favourite podcast episodes
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s1 my beloved
transcript below the cut:
CASPAR: Anyway, this is Midnight Burger. I’m Caspar.
AVA (Outside): FUCK. YES.
CASPAR: That’s Ava, she’s always here.
AVA: (Outside) NICOTINE, GET IN ME.
CASPAR: And this is a... diner.
GLORIA: Are you sure?
--
CASPAR: The huge murder beast is having a coffee break
--
ZEBULON: For our marriage is made strong by a singular truth.
EFFIE: That divorce is an abomination.
ZEBULON: … And that we love each other very much.
EFFIE: Yes, also that.
--
THE EX: You can’t let that stand in the way of true love.
LEIF: Honey, you lay eggs.
THE EX: Why do you keep bringing that up?!
LEIF: It’s an important detail!
--
GLORIA: Do you ever feel like Leif is almost too relaxed? He goes with the flow no matter what, it’s weird.
AVA: Oh yeah? Watch this. Hey, Leif?
LEIF (In the kitchen): Yeah?
AVA: I’ve been thinking about it and, I don’t know, I still feel like a hot dog is a sandwich.
[POTS CRASHING.]
LEIF (In the kitchen): For fuck’s sake!
--
MARY: Can you help me?
CASPAR: What’s happening?
MARY: The officer outside, he’s been looking for me for days. I’ve managed to avoid him so far but now that’s him outside. Can you hide me somewhere? This desperate plea is brought to you by Arby’s. Arby’s, we have the meats.
---
LEIF: This Molotov Cocktail is brought to you by communism!
[BOTTLE SMASHING]
--
EFFIE: Yes, yes, of course. Our Lord is a God of peace.
ZEBULON: Indeed.
EFFIE: Unless you’re a merchant outside the temple, then look out for the chokehold of Jesus.
ZEBULON: Honey!
--
CASPAR: Ava, what are you doing?
AVA: I’m getting this jug of moonshine and going out in the parking lot to watch a fist fight. Suck on that, Stephen Hawking.
--
CASPAR: Oh, no. What are we going to do without all the essential work you do around here? Who will do the incredibly hard work of being an asshole to people?
AVA: That’s not work, that’s how I relax.
CASPAR: Well you must be really relaxed.
---
STEVE: We had come upon a binary star system. I looked upon these two stars rotating around their barycenter and my thoughts turned to my wife. We were like these two stars, locked into an eternal dance only due to chance and gravity, unable to recall a moment where we chose each other and unable to escape this rotation. Knowing that to move closer would obliterate us both.
CASPAR: This went from fun idea to Russian novel real fast.
--
STEVE: Hello, my friends. I am about to go on a date.
CASPAR: Yeah, we heard... uhhh nice work, buddy.
LEIF: Go get ‘em, tiger.
STEVE: I have no idea how to go on a date.
CASPAR: Oh.
LEIF: Shit, okay, uh...
CASPAR: Um... Ask her about her job.
LEIF: Yeah, her life in general.
CASPAR: Listen a lot.
LEIF: Don’t try and be funny.
CASPAR: Try sharing a secret with her.
LEIF: If she asks you to do something illegal, it may be a test.
CASPAR: What?
LEIF: Really gauge the situation at that point, is she kidding or does she actually want to do crimes?
CASPAR: What are you talking about?
LEIF: This is good advice.
CASPAR: Where, the Pirate Isle of Tortuga?
--
EFFIE: Caspar, thanks for being with us today.
CASPAR (Whispering): So great to be here, go fuck yourself.
--
CASPAR: Gloria, we’re going to have to go.
GLORIA: Oh, man. Okay. Guys, gather round.
[HEARTBREAKING MUSIC]
CASPAR: What the hell is that music?
[WOLVES WIMPERING]
GLORIA: V, Jungkook, Jimin, Suga, Jin, RM, J-Hope. I want you to know that I love you all very much. But I have my own pack, and I have to go run with them now.
EFFIE: (Fighting back tears) It’s... so hard to hear her say goodbye to the wolves.
ZEBULON (Also crying): I didn’t realize she named them after the members of BTS.
--
CASPAR: We should get one of those signs that says “This many days since an accident”.
LEIF: Yeah, except ours would say “This many days since your sentient radio quoted the Egyptian Book of the Dead, switched personalities, or steered you into a supermassive black hole.”
CASPAR: ...That’s way too long for a sign, Leif.
GLORIA: Yeah, Leif, that’s—
--
CASPAR: As a straight white male you know one thing about me: I’ve watched a lot of History Channel.
--
GLORIA: Okay, I’m thinking a chair, some rope, and I’ll pour hot coffee on her, let’s do some Guantanamo shit.
JANE (Overlapping): It’s no use, guys.
--
GLORIA: Did the doors to the diner just lock?
CASPAR: They did. Effie, what in the Amityville Horror is happening right now?
--
JANE: Does having you kidnapped maybe count as a romantic gesture at all?
--
CASPAR, narrating: In Ava’s defense, she was unilaterally putting everyone in danger... That doesn’t make it better, does it?
--
AVA: I am going to rip your balls off!
CASPAR: Oh, don’t threaten me with a good time.
#midnight burger#midnight burger podcast#podcast recommendation#i love them all so much#also#i finally figured out audio transitions#was not that hard#but also#this took me way longer than i thought#writing. voice acting. dynamics. all so good.#who else is doing is like midnight burger#i mean actually who is bc i need to know. none of my podcasts are updating/updating frequently and im losing it#lord knows if i'll do this for any other season tbh#i also was tempted to animate this but i ran into two problems: motivation and lack of skill#so it'll stay in my head lmao
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what even is the tma Annie lore I'm curious now
god. okay. so like. annie was the child of two avatars from rival cult families, newt crane, a web avatar, and lamia wright, a hunt avatar. from birth to the age of 11 she was largely kept hidden from the outside world due to the danger of either of her parents' families harming her, leading an extremely sheltered life. unfortunately at the age of 11 newt's family got sick of his shit and had him and his wife killed by a stranger avatar who erased newt from existence, impersonated him in order to infiltrate his home, terrorized annie for a couple of months and then died fighting their mom, who realized it wasn't her husband when it tried to kill their child. annie was supposed to be killed with them, but they survived, so they were taken in by the cranes, who didn't really want anything to do with them and considered them an inconvenience but couldn't easily have them killed off due to the media and true crime attention the death of their parents attracted. they ended up alternately neglecting annie and tormenting him, since they're an avatar family and he was a convenient source of easy fear.
annie escaped when he turned 18 and was legally able to inherit his parents' will and become independent, and briefly spent some time poking around the magnus institute trying to learn what really happened to his parents, since he knew it wasn't an ordinary occurence and, despite being heavily traumatized and suffering from a cocktail of mental health issues that led to a lot of people dismissing her insistence that her parents were killed by some kind of monster, didn't believe the widely accepted story that newt murdered his wife and attempted to murder his child before fleeing and never being found (because, well, she was there. it happened to her.). this led to her only becoming even more paranoid and traumatized by the knowledge that the supernatural does, in fact, exsit, and it wants to eat you so bad.
annie's family, the cranes, started getting sick of annie's shit like they did with newt at this point, so annie, in an attempt to avoid sharing their parents' fate, faked their death and ran away to america, where they ended up joining the usher foundation, another paranormal research institute (this is where the rp server i made them for started). through a series of increasingly unfortunate and messy events, annie developed latent desolation avatar powers that had been lying dormant since their highly traumatic and difficult childhood; made some friends through trauma bonding; got one of said friends killed and turned into a monster (eye avatar) while attempting to protect her from the other side of his family, the wrights, who turned out to have been hunting annie's coworker's family for generations in order to perform an everchase ritual (small world); briefly lost all of their friends because of this and got trapped in the lonely due to their guilt and self loathing causing them to self isolate; sacrificed himself to the desolation in the lonely and finally became a fully fledged avatar; met a paranormal investigator named raz (who is my beloved's oc) and accompanied him to a haunted meat packing plant where they saved each other from a rampaging ghost bull; developed a crush on raz after he stood between her and the bull that rapidly turned into hypercodependent devotion; went into the spiral to rescue him when he got eaten by it one time; started a relationship together; nearly died in a haunted house fighting him when they both got possessed by angry ghosts; and even attended a masquerade party one time.
#oc: annie#this isnt even getting into his angelverse lore. which is somehow even more utterly insane.
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The Stakebait Coterie! Khloe and her boys are out there saving the Atlanta Waterbloods or get Final Death'd trying! (I'll type it all beneath the cut because I know.. my handwriting)
The main characters of the Poisoned Peach - ATL by Night chronicle my beloved is running for me! Khloe is my character, and the boys are my unbeatably dope team.
Name: Khloe Mariah Osbourne
Born: 05/04/1993, Embraced: 2022 by a Ventrue, came out Thinblood, Physical Age: 29
Height: 5'5", Hair: Dark Brown, Eyes: Hazel, Gender: Miss (She/Her), Nationality: American
Likes: Coffee, True Crime, Tabletop RPGs, Being a Minx, Staying Busy
Dislikes: Disappointing Others, Being Unprepared, Not knowing what's up, Her body, Tiktok-Style Ads
A little history: Khloe grew up the only child of very normal people who nastily divorced when she graduated high school. An avid reader and over-thinker, Khloe has immersed herself in many fantasy worlds and strategy games to the point where she seems to think of everything. A people pleaser who has a lot of good acquaintances yet no friends, the lack of companionship was hard-felt when COVID rolled around and kept everyone inside. Had a few partners, though none lasted. One night after visiting her mother, she found herself on a backroad all alone, save for the oncoming headlights that may be straying in her lane. (Where the Poisoned Peach begins!)
Name: Kyle Johnson
Born: 2/3/1994, Embraced: 2020, Sire unknown, but came out Thinblood, Physical Age: 26
Height: 5’10", Hair: N/A, Eyes: Sexy-Boy Brown, Gender: More man than your man (He/Him), Nationality: American
Likes: Feeling needed and helping others, Parties, Drinking cocktails with stupid names, Reasonable reactions.
Dislikes: Being late, people that CAN help and just don't, the MINIONS, Improperly labelled content warnings.
History: His mom was a nurse, her mom was a nurse, and so on. His sisters didn’t want to carry on the tradition, so he decided to go into the medical field himself as an EMT. The stress of the job brought on early balding, but he thrived both on the clock and in the club. One night, he drank a few too many and he woke up in a dumpster the next night, completely clueless. The sunlight began to hurt, nothing sat right in his stomach. Everything was the same yet all so different, better and worse. He spiraled, confused and depressed, until the Dusk Angel found him and helped him come to terms with his new existence. Now Kyle proudly helps the Thinblood Revolution as a kind face to help ease the new blood in, just as he had been.
Name: Randolph "Ralph" Gaylord King III
Born: 10/09/1996, Embraced: 2021 by a Nosferatu, came out Thinblood, Physical Age: 25
Height: 6'5" (Even pre-Embrace, him just big), Hair: Brown (Has to shave the remnants every evening, used to be long and thick and in a man-bun), Eyes: Yellow-Orange (Brown pre-Embrace), Gender: BOI (He/Him), Nationality: American
Likes: Guns, Bad Jokes, Strategy Games, Annoying Christian, Being a right menace
Dislikes: Himself :(, Whiny people, Beer, Signs with sayings meant to be taken serious.
Some Background: Born in St. Louis Missouri, Ralph had a pretty standard lower middle class upbringing. He followed his father and older brother and joined the army when he turned 18 right out of high school. Years of prep and hard work paid off as he went through candidate courses, eventually making it into Special Forces. His career was short-lived however after losing his right foot on his first deployment. Depression and dead-end jobs seemed to be his future until as a joke he started posting thirst-traps on social media, but it got real when his follower count spiked and sponsors started making offers. He was thrown into the life of an Insta-Thot - specifically Fitness Inspo - ultimately landing him in a party in Atlanta, Georgia, where his soon to be sire, Bill - a jealous and spiteful Nosferatu - lurked. Ralph was alone as he stumbled to his hotel room, and Bill could contain his hate no longer. To him, Ralph deserved to be as ugly on the outside as Bill thought he had to be on the inside. Little did Bill know, he messed with the wrong guy.
(Not written due to lack of room, we clearly don't play favorites here...) Eventually found in the sewers by the Dusk Angel, Ralph now serves in the Thinblood revolution, using every skill he's acquired in order to get revenge against the Fullbloods.
Name: Christian Ottavio
Born: 01/16/1989, Embraced: 2017, Gangrel sire but came out Thinblood, Physical Age: A rough 28
Height: 6'1", Hair: Dark Brown, Eyes: Brown, Gender: The MAN (He/Him), Nationality: American
Likes: Beer, Relaxing nights spent inside, Napping, His truck
Dislikes: His family, Wearing tight jeans, Bro-Country music, Fullbloods
A bit of background: Born and bred in Georgia into a rich family with ideals he couldn't wrap his head around. Went into the workforce at a young age in an effort to escape them and be on his own. He's had to sleep in his truck many a night, but eventually got everything together enough to get a roof over his head. That was until some uppity lick decided to draft him into the army of the damned during the Atlanta Sabbat civil war. He was one of many forced to fight during the schism, and one of the few to come out "alive." Before his sire could take him behind the proverbial tool shed, Christian was saved by the Dusk Angel, and now is a proud Thinblood freedom fighter.
#stakebait coterie#thinblood#duskborn#clan thinblood#clan duskborn#vampire the masquerade#vampire oc#vtm oc#vtm#world of darkness#my art#MY BABIES MY ANGELS OUR CHILDRENNNNN#vamily#coterie#khloe#kyle#ralph#christian#gotta do the DUSK ANGEL bio next lmaoooo#the poisoned peach: atl by night
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