#this is so late but he deserves every birthday arts in the world | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

fayes-fics · 1 year

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Happy Birthday, Mr Bridgerton

Pairing: Benedict Bridgerton x fem!reader

Summary: Benedict's wife gives him the best possible birthday gift.

Warnings: 18+ smut, minors dni, masturbation, vaginal sex, massage, pregnancy.

Word Count: 3.0k

Author's Note: A more romantic fic than my usual. The sweet, soulful artist deserves to be loved and cherished. Enjoy <3

It’s midnight, and a birthday has just begun.

You pad through the house to Benedict’s studio. He is perched on a stool, busy sketching. He often works late into the night when the muse takes him. You pause in the open doorway to watch him work. Admiring his skills as he feathers his charcoal across the page. Admiring him, the movements of his artistic hands, his white shirt sleeves rolled up to his elbows, his braces hanging loose around his hips.

“Happy birthday, my love,” you call softly as you close the door.

“Thank you, my lo…” his answer dies on his lips as he turns and sees you.

Speechless is a good start.

Your skin feels aglow as you bask in his attention, sauntering towards him. His eyes track your every movement. His hand is still suspended in midair, charcoal in hand.

Your gown is totally sheer, the colour of your flesh, its only adornment being tiny starbursts of silver sequins that glitter in the candlelight. You feel beautiful in it, like a walking shimmering fireworks display. With a few layers of chemises, this would be a stunning ball gown; without them, it’s a scandalous sight. Everything is visible through the translucent tulle layers. And you wear absolutely nothing underneath except a dab or two of his favourite perfume.

He still hasn’t said anything, but he is breathing slightly heavily as you draw up to him, his eyes raking up and down your body. You pluck the charcoal between his fingers and place it down on his easel.

“I am the luckiest man in the world,” he exhales quietly, finally finding his voice.

Warmth blooms in your chest, and you smile fondly at his compliment, stepping between his slightly bended knees; one of his feet looped onto the stool, the other kicked out towards the easel. You set aside a little glass vial you came in holding.

“Wh…” he begins, but you hush him with a soft finger to his lips.

“Shh, you don’t need to speak tonight, my love,” you murmur, running your hands into his hair, “just feel.”

His eyes soften and give silent acceptance, and his body relaxes a notch. Even though he finds solace in his art, he’s had a long few days; you want to soothe him and bring him peace.

His soulful blue eyes watch your expressions as your fingertips trail across his cheekbones, curling inwards to brush the back of your fingers down his jawline to his chin, mapping the structure of his face. There are libraries worth of literature extolling female beauty, but you’ve found precious few pieces that capture the truth of male beauty such as his. Your thumb traces gently over his lips, and you ghost a smile as he busses gently against your digit.

You move your hands to outline the shell of his ears, passing his earlobes between your fingers, sweeping down to cup his neck, pressingly on the tension points you feel corded there. He exhales deeply, leaning into your touch, his eyes fluttering closed. Tonight it’s all about making him feel special, not just because it’s his birthday, but because he spends so much of his time catering to the needs of others, most of all yours, and he deserves to be indulged.

Splaying your fingers upwards around the back of his head, you enjoy running them into his thick hair. He hums contentedly as you massage lightly. Then his breath hitches as you scrape your nails lightly across his scalp, the skin around his open shirt collar erupting into goosebumps. Oh, the responsiveness is so enchanting.

You lean forward and kiss his lips softly, just a brief touch. His eyes fly open, and he chases your lips as you pull away. He pleads with the most mournful expression, so you relent and press your lips to his again. His hands curl around your shoulders, their sizeable warmth at once both centring and sending you soaring. He kisses back slowly, opening his lips slightly, his tongue requesting permission to yours. Hands still in his hair, you pull closer, deepening the kiss. His arms now slide around your back to hold you close. It’s luscious and languid. Shared breaths and gentle flirtation.

You reach down and tug his shirt up. He assists your efforts, removing his arms from around you and pulling the garment up and over his head. You catalogue the sculpted plains of his arms, chest, and stomach. He is watching your face with a crooked smile; he knows all the telltale signs of your desire. Your tongue feels thick, wanting to run over every inch. For later, you tell yourself.

His brow knits in puzzlement as you circle him, coming to a halt behind him instead. You kiss the back of his neck, running your nose up into his hair, where his natural scent is most potent. On instinct, it draws you closer; your hands curl around his biceps as you press your upper body against him. The rasp of your tulle dress against his shoulder blades hitches his breath and yours, the friction causing your nipples to pebble heavily. Knowing he can feel it too—a little tease of what else will come later.

He is listening intently as you reach for the small glass vial you came in with, opening it and pouring a little oil into your palm. Usually, by now, he would be asking what you're doing, using the velvety tone that makes your body sing. Tonight he is quiet, but one look into his eyes would say everything his lips are not.

Notes of orange and bergamot swirl into the air as you massage the oil into your hands, warming it. His inhale is a sign he recognises the scent from the hours of pleasure in your bedroom. Usually, it is him massaging your body into a blissful state before slipping his fingers inside you, making you come over and over. More derailing thoughts you need to put aside.

You begin by running the flanks of your hands firmly down either side of his spine, all the way from his neck to his waist. His moan is one of relief, not desire, but your body reacts regardless; the sudden want to be filled by him is visceral. Your lips tingle to kiss him again, but you resist the urge, focussing on bringing him serenity.

Feeling the tension easing under your fingers as you work on the knots around his neck is a mutual reward. His breath is deep and even; he shifts to place both feet flat on the floor. You spend many minutes mapping the stress points in his back and kneading the flesh until it relents into a relaxed state. His hums and sighs act as the guide for your progress. You circle back to his front when it seems he is entirely free from any strain.

“Does that feel better, my love?” You know the answer, but asking gives you a moment to indulge your heart, appreciating the blissful look on his face as he nods contentedly.

He pulls you in for another kiss and gently bites your lower lip. The room grows a few degrees warmer, a sparking feeling notching up your spine, radiating out across your skin.

You run your hands heavily up his thighs, admiring the latent power you feel underneath the material, him watching your movements. Your hands reach his hips and pause, waiting for his gaze to meet yours. Then you start unbuttoning; you know he’s not wearing anything underneath today; he often doesn’t when you are home. It’s gratifying to watch his pupils dilate as you twist your mouth into a playful pout with each button relenting.

As you reach the last button, you grin broadly, grab his hand instead, and pull him bodily across the room towards the emerald green chaise. The one you have posed on countless times for him. He trails behind you with a carefree laugh, holding up his britches with his free hand.

“No need for modesty Mr Bridgerton” you tease as you pull him to a stop next to the chaise. He raises an eyebrow and lifts his hand, his britches falling to a heap on the floor. Your gaze descends to his cock, standing proud. So familiar to you now, but every time as tantalising and thrilling as the first time he showed you his body.

“Why do you ever wear clothes?” you think wistfully. Your cheeks flush as his lopsided smile tells you you have voiced your thoughts.

“If the lady wishes, I never will again in this house”, he whispers seductively. “But only if you only ever wear this dress” His fingers trace the neckline of your gown with feather-soft touches. “Or nothing at all.” His lips find the spot just below your earlobe that makes you shiver.

“This evening is supposed to be about me seducing you, birthday boy,” you admonish affectionately, pulling your neck away reluctantly, “not the other way around.”

“By all means, Mrs Bridgerton, please continue,” using that voice he knows makes your knees weak.

“Lay down,” you whisper.

He relaxes back on the chaise, one arm tucked behind his head, with an easy smile, an innate confidence in his nudity. You wish you had his skills to capture this moment on a canvas. You take your time surveying the sight before you, shameless almost in your ogling. Ladies of good breeding are not supposed to be so lascivious, but you can’t help it when it comes to your husband. He is gorgeous to you. And, based on how heads turn when he walks into a room, you are not alone in that sentiment. Not for the first time; you consider yourself very lucky he returned your feelings.

“Penny, for your thoughts, my love,” his arm reaching for you, his fingers gently circling your wrist.

“I was just thinking I am the luckiest woman in the world,” you reply truthfully, echoing his sentiment when you walked in earlier, leaning down to kiss the hand that holds your wrist.

His smile turns almost shy, and he averts his eyes, long eyelashes fluttering as a slight blush colours his cheeks. It makes your heart melt and your pussy clench simultaneously. How he can do that astounds you. You want to wrap him in the tightest, sweetest hug but also fuck him so hard your teeth rattle. What a beautiful contradiction.

“I had all these plans,” you sigh, “but I find myself impatient for you, my love.”

“Tell me about them,” he requests, looking back up at you, his lips tugging into a playful, beautiful crooked grin.

“I planned to tease you for ages, kiss every inch of your skin from your ankles to your hair,” you reply, your gaze tracking up his body again, fingers itching to trail over his contours.

“Sounds lovely,” his voice teasing.

“Mmmm, but,” you hitch up your dress and straddle him, settling your hips on his waist, your dress fanning out over him, your fingers tracing the constellation of freckles on his breastbone, “you are too tempting, Mr Bridgerton, and I find I just want you inside me.”

“That sounds even better,” he admits, his voice rough as he grabs your knee and runs a hand up your thigh under the gauzy layers. His questing fingers slide between your legs, and you moan as he expertly flexes them against you.

You grab his forearm. “No, my darling, it’s you who gets the pleasure tonight,” you counter, gently shaking your head and pulling his hand away.

“But I want to watch you. I love your face when I do this to you,” Benedict pleads, his eyes so beseeching.

“Then allow me,” you offer with a raised eyebrow.

Gathering your dress slightly, you slide your fingers between your legs, loving the wetness you find there, all for him. You moan gently, holding his gaze as your fingers move. His grip on your thigh tightens; you intuit what he is asking for and speed up your ministrations. You bite your lip and groan loudly, not daring to break eye contact. His other hand behind his head moves to grip your other thigh; his Adam's apple bobs visibly as he swallows, and his chest rises and falls more visibly.

“I need you,” his voice breathy and low, “please…”

Your fingers slip from your body and reach behind to grab him, and he groans as you give him a few gentle pumps with your hand before shuffling backwards to line him up with your body. Watching many expressions flit across his face, revelling in his breathy anticipation, you allow his tip inside. His moan is like poetry, and you sink fractionally lower, loving how it feels when he invades your body—the insistent stretch and heat. You roll your hips, eager to envelop him but also to maintain a slow tease. He looks at you pleadingly.

“What do you need, my beautiful birthday boy?” you ask softly.

“Please, my love, take all of me; I need you,” his voice sounds so needy it makes your chest flutter.

You smile as his eyes burn into yours, then sink down, gasping at the hot, plunging invasion pulling you so taunt. The lustful noise he emits makes you pulse around him, which in turn makes him call out your name, a wanton call and response that has you grabbing his hands and placing them on your breasts. The tulle of your dress scrunches against your nipple, sequins catching against your sensitive skin and between his fingers. He slips his hand inside the neckline and grabs your naked flesh as you press into his touch and start to rock gently.

Usually, you talk to each other when you make love, whispering debauched thoughts or just communicating how you feel. But tonight, you enjoy a silent, almost psychic connection, something more sensual and decadent, staring into each other's eyes, saying everything without words. Your movements are fluid but slow and deliberate, savouring the intoxicating feel of him sliding within you.

He lifts your left hand from his body and brings it to his mouth, brushing his lips over the wedding ring you wear proudly. You mirror his actions, taking his left hand, but instead plunge his wedding ring finger into your mouth, sucking it gently, the metal of his ring knocking against your teeth as you rise and fall. Hoping to convey through your actions the depth of emotion and passion you feel for this man.

He groans and drives his hips upwards, sliding even deeper, catching against the top of your channel, your toes flexing at the pleasure that causes. You call his name, releasing his hand, your nails scratching over his abs. Something more carnal, taking you both somewhere frantic.

You surge up and down, chasing all the sensations, his hands running down your back, warm through the layers of your dress, grasping your hips and pulling your down harder into him as your fingernails drag against the ripples of his abdomen muscles. Over and over until your thighs burn, and still, you don't ever want to stop, revelling in the feeling you get every time he nudges that place inside you that makes all the exertion worth it.

You see in his eyes as he is approaching his peak, the desperation for you to join him, making you reach under your dress and touch yourself, him hissing encouragements as you do so. His voice rockets you to the edge, the sonorous rumbling through his body that sweeps you over to a place that is a kaleidoscope of bliss; breath stolen, body tensing and releasing, firing a euphoria in every fibre from your scalp to your toes. Distantly, you can hear him climaxing, his fingers a vice-like grip as his groan turns guttural, and he holds you down fiercely. All his muscles tense in rigid relief as he comes hard. He looks so beautiful in this moment, biting his lip and screwing his eyes shut, that you collapse onto him and kiss his jaw, even biting gently in a way that makes him more vocal and his grip stronger.

Then as the intensity of the moment passes, all is serene as you recover together, breaths evening out, hands laced together. These quiet moments after the passionate storm feel the most intimate—the languid caresses, soft kisses and whispered words.

“Thank you for the most wonderful birthday gift,” he sighs, sated, as you lay atop him, your head on his shoulder, drawing idle shapes on his pectoral muscle with the tips of your fingers.

“A massage and making love are not your gift, my love,” you refute quietly, twisting your head to look up into his inquisitive eyes. “You deserve those and so much more. No, your gift is something else entirely. There is a reason I dressed like this, to look like the nicest gift wrapping that I possibly could,” you explain and sit up, straddling him again.

“I will always think of you as the best gift in my life,” he chuckles happily.

“Not me, Benedict.” You grab his hand and place it on your dress, just below your belly button.

“There is a gift in here for you, my love. It will probably take another, hmm, seven months, but I think it will be the greatest gift you, and indeed I, could ever receive. A beautiful gift we made together.”

His breath catches, and his mouth opens a fraction in surprise; his eyes suddenly go glassy and soft with emotion.

“Are you with child, my love?” he murmurs excitedly.

“I believe I am Mr Bridgerton. Or should I say papa?” you smile indulgently. Suddenly he is sitting up and pulling you into an embrace with his other arm, his lips finding yours.

“This is the best gift ever,” he grins, his eyes damp, his hand cradling your still-flat belly as if it is the most precious thing in the world.

“Happy birthday, Mr Bridgerton,” you beam as you place your hand over his, “from both of us.”

Benedict taglist: @makaylan @foreverlonginguniverse @iboopedyournose @wysteria-clad @colettebronte @aintnuthinbutahounddog @severewobblerlightdragon @margofiore @writergirl-2001 @heeyyyou @enichole445 @enchantedbytomandhenry @ambitionspassionscoffee @chaoticcalzoneranchsports @nikaprincessofkattegat @baebee35 @crowleysqueenofhell @bridgertontess @fiction-is-life @lilacbeesworld

#benedict bridgerton #benedict bridgerton fanfiction #benedict bridgerton smut #benedict bridgerton fluff #benedict bridgerton x reader #benedict bridgerton x female reader #benedict bridgerton x you #benedict bridgerton x y/n #benedict bridgerton imagine #bridgerton fanfiction #bridgerton smut #bridgerton imagine #bridgerton #bridgerton x reader #1k notes #1k notes omg you guys!

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shiggyscumrag · 1 year

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WHOLESOME THOUGHTS WITH SHIGGY!

I've been looking back at my old fics and headcanons and mu god has my writing style and interests changed. So I've decided to make an updated HORNY THOUGHTS WITH SHIGGY!!!! Tbh most of them are gonna be wholesome <3 Bakugou has been on my mind A LOT lately so we're gonna start with him!!

Wholesome headcanons

I feel like sometimes when he gets home from patrol he is either a cuddle bug or doesn't want to be touched at all. Being a pro hero puts a lot of strain on the body! So when he comes home more emotionally exhausted sometimes he likes being cuddled and being taken care of. However when he comes home from a patrol that was particularly cruel on his muscles he prefers to just kinda lay there and not be touched.

I love two ideas. Bakugou either not being to handle his liquor at all OR being able to take shot after shot and not feel a thing but hate the taste and doesn't like to drink very often because of it. Like he'll go party with you and friends but he usually won't drink unless it's a special occasion. For the light weight version he would take shot for shot with you on a holiday (New years, Birthday, etc) and after the second shot he's fuckinf gone. Like he's there but snaps back into reality every 5 secs but he just looks so cute with the blush from the heat of the alcohol under his skin. Or on the heavy weight side he would also take shot for shot with you only getting tipsy as you reach your limit. Let's say around 5 shots for fun. He says to you "I'm glad you're done cause that tastes like shit." He just hates the alcohol taste.

I'm not a huge fan of baths. Like I hate them. So in this headcanon Bakugou would instead take showers with you rather than baths. Or if you wanted company while taking a shower but he didn't want to go in he would just sit on the counter and talk to you, read a book or scroll through his phone possibly looking for new recipes. And I course you would do the same thing for him!!

If you were an artist of any sort (I'm an art major give me a break) he would absolutely adore the home made gifts you'd make him. When you guys eventually move into your first place together he would hang up the gifts you gave him in his office or around the living areas. When guests came over and complimented the piece he would always subtly brag that you painted it and he can only have the best art pieces in his home because he has the best artist in the world living with him and making him custom peices. Also if he ever did a charity event and needed like a design or logo he would come to you either asking advice or commission you to do it. Fuck asking for it for free, even though you'd tell him you'd do it free of charge since you're dating and it's charity. But he INSISTS on paying you because you deserve it for all the hard work, love and care you put into it.

He would give you the aux in the car everytime. He knows you usually ask everytime if he has any requests and just queues them in between songs you like so it works out fine for him. You're happy he's happy, nothing to complain about.

However you met (preferably outside of UA) he would find it pretty important that early on in the relationship that he introduces you to his friends (kiri, mina, denki, and sero) just so he can see how you would fair around them. I mean he's around them 24/7 practically so it's important you get along. They are like family to him so it's also important they approve of you, even though he says he doesn't give a shit about their approval.

He secretly loves when you feel up his muscles. It just makes him feel good. He also likes when you rub his back with your nails. It just feels so nice, especially after a day of training and or patrol. It's the perfect relaxer. I feel he would also like it if you rubbed his temples gently when he laid his head in your lap. It could honeslty soothe him right to sleep.

Not so wholesome headcanons (18+ MDNI)

Biting? Check. Choking? Check. An occasional creampie? ...Check. Sorry just had to check off some of the kinks I think Bakugou would indulge in and fantasize about.

Bakugou is a pretty aggressive guy. Some might even say he's a bit mean sometimes. Cruel even. Never to you though. He can get very possessive though. The way he questions when anyone other than his friends and family talk about you. The arm around you at all times in public. The marks that litter your skin underneath your clothing. Oh yeah, he likes to mark you. He swears it's all for your pleasure, I mean you do love the occasional hickey and the way it feels when he bites and sucks on your skin. But it is a bit much when they cover almost all of the entirety of your body. Of course only the parts he can see and possibly sometimes a few on your neck when he's really worked up.

If he decided to do a little quicky in a semi public place he would most definetely let you bite down on his shoulder. Which I feel would be a rarity just cause he'd rather not deal with the possible repercussions of getting caught. He doesnt mind the pain. Like at all. Actually it helps him get off a little bit. It gives him just the right amount of pain and pleasure to get him going absolutely feral.

Some of his fav positions include: normal cowgirl aka riding him into oblivion, reverse cowgirl aka riding him into oblivion just with more ass, doggy, missionary, mating press, you riding his face. The list could go on.

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jerzwriter · 3 months

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I hope you have a day full of love and sunshine - you deserve nothing less! Thank you for always caring about others and spreading joy - even when it's not the easiest thing to do. Thank you for always, always being there for me, and for simply being you. It was a very, very good day when you entered this world, ma'am. We're all better for it!

I hope you enjoy this beautiful art from @callmebeem. Olivia deserved some love today, too. You know darn well Merida & Casey would never let her day slip by uncelebrated, so here's a little fic for you - I hope it makes you smile. Sending you a huge hug and HAPPY BIRTHDAY!

Something Sweet

In some ways, it was a typical Boston morning. The Paramount Diner was bustling with city-dwellers grabbing sustenance before heading to work. The clattering of dishes, morning news blaring from the TV, and a mixture of North End and Brahmin accents shouting orders to Joey, who manned the grill, was not out of the ordinary. The unusual thing was our chatty little crew could actually hear it.

It had become a Wednesday morning tradition. Ethan and Bryce headed there right after the gym; Merida and Olivia stopped by before work, and Casey and Tobias arrived just after... well... you know. Olivia had dubbed them the “breakfast besties,” and Ethan did his best to prevent rolling his eyes every time he heard it. On a typical morning, there would be at least three different conversations taking place, each trying to yell over the other, and anything happening outside of their table would be a misty blur.

But today, you could hear a pin drop. It could be attributed to a late case that left Tobias, Casey, Ethan, and Merida with very little sleep. Or it might have to do with the flight they had to catch in three hours. Perhaps Bryce had a case of nerves over the surgery he had been called to assist on at U Mass Memorial. The rare procedure was being streamed live to nearly every major hospital and medical school in America. No pressure there. The only one who appeared to have a normal day ahead was Olivia, and that was the problem.

Bryce scowled in an utterly oblivious Ethan's direction. But the curmudgeonly doctor couldn’t ignore the handsome, young surgeon when he blurted out, “I can’t believe you had to make this presentation today... of all days!”

Merida looped their arm with Ethan’s and leaned in close.

“Hey, you know I’m the last one who would typically rush to his defense, but I don’t think Ethan had anything to do with scheduling the AMA symposium.”

“And while I’m the next to last person to rush to his defense,” Tobias jumped in. “I can confirm he wasn't on their selection committee, either. So he wasn’t the one that invited us to present.”

Ethan reached for his coffee with a shake of his head. “Thank you both... I think.”

Across the table, Olivia was growing increasingly uncomfortable. “Guys, it’s OK. We’ve been over this before... I don’t mind.”

“Well, I mind,” Bryce frowned, and Ethan couldn't hold back anymore.

“Lahela, for what it’s worth, I’m not responsible for you being asked to assist on a pulmonary autograft at U Mass either.”

“I know,” Bryce unreasonably tried to reason. “But if you didn’t have the symposium today, I wouldn’t have to worry about Olivia being alone at Edenbrook on her birthday!”

“Bryce,” Olivia comforted. “It’s all right. I’m a big girl, and we’re all celebrating this weekend. It’s OK.”

And it was. She was an adult, after all, not only an adult but a doctor, just like the others. It would be silly to think that their busy worlds would stop just because it was her birthday. But if she was completely honest, she was a little sad that she wouldn’t see any of their faces in Edenbrook today.

“It’s all right,” Casey said, tapping Olivia’s knee. “We are going to spoil the heck out of this beauty on Saturday.”

“Damn straight we are,” Merida chimed in. “We have an epic spa day planned, with bottomless mimosas to boot! You guys are lucky if we remember to meet you for dinner after!"

“Oh, you’ll remember,” Tobias chuckled. “If you think Casey will forget meatballs at Carmelina's, you’re bugging.”

Ethan let out a sigh. "Is this where someone makes an obnoxious comment about these two and meatballs."

"Only you," Casey teased. "You really need to stop being such an adolescent, Ramsey!"

Ignoring the exasperated expression on Ethan's face, Casey turned to Olivia.

“I love that we share a favorite restaurant.”

“Of course we do,” Olivia grinned. “We have exquisite taste!” She turned to Bryce and lovingly brushed his hair away from his eyes. “Honey, as far as I’m concerned, Saturday is my birthday, and it will be great. Today... it’s just another Wednesday.”

After giving Olivia a dozen kisses, Bryce left directly for U Mass while the others headed to Edenbrook. Olivia had a busy day ahead, and her friends were checking in on patients before their flight. But Casey couldn't help but feel sad when she watched Olivia walk away.

“I know I said it doesn’t matter, but I was just trying to look at the bright side. Honestly, I hate that we won't be here for Liv’s birthday.”

“Yeah,” Merida soughed. “I feel the same way. Of all days for us to all be away.”

“In reality, we’d all be busy working anyway, but at least we could take little moments throughout the day to make her feel special, you know?”

Merida tapped their pen on the desk. That glimmer that appeared in their eyes whenever an idea struck suddenly appeared. “Come with me!" Merida said, grabbing Casey's hand. "I have an idea.”

~~~~~

Several hours later, Bryce was focused on his surgery as the other's plane touched down in Cleveland. Olivia grabbed her folders from the nurses’ station, surprised to find a bright pink envelope on top of the stack.

With a gentle smile, she put the note in her pocket and continued with her day. Before she knew it, she was ready to sign off for lunch when Nurse Laura handed her an envelope.

“What’s this?” Olivia asked. “I’m not waiting on any results?”

“Not sure,” Laura shrugged. “But I was given strict orders to get that to you right before you headed to lunch.”

Olivia opened the envelope to find an ecru sheet of fine stationery, a note with penmanship not typically associated with a doctor inside.

Olivia beamed as she held the note close to her heart. She was filled with warmth, and not just because she was anxious for the delicious Penne.

“Laura, you have lunch now, don’t you?”

“I do,” the nurse nodded.

“Good! Join me! Carmelina’s portions are more than enough for two, and trust me! You’ll love this!”

~~~~~

The day was busier than usual, so it passed by in a flash, and now, it was time to go home. She just had to make one stop at the nurse's station, to pick up the beautiful flowers Bryce had delivered. But it looked like her surprises weren’t over yet. An adorable pink box from Little Miss Cupcape sat next to her flowers, a colorful note affixed.

The nurses watched on silently as Olivia’s eyes began to tear. “Your friends really love you,” Laura smiled.

“I know,” Liv blushed. “Leave it to them to make me feel special from seven hundred miles away.”

She gathered up her belongings when Laura reminded her of just one more thing... there was no way the nurses were letting her leave before they got to sing.

I hope you enjoyed this, Dani. I know this isn't the easiest birthday for you, but I still hope you find joy in special little moments throughout the day—just like Olivia did here.

Sending you the biggest of hugs! xoxo

#HAPPY BIRTHDAY DANI!!!!#open heart #open heart choices #olivia hadley #bryce lahela #bryce x olivia #ethan ramsey #ethan x merida #tobias carrick #tobias x casey #playchoices

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gunsli-01 · 7 months

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for milgram oc ask game ages 11 and 16 and questions 4, 8, 10, 11

Oh, yay!

4. Do they view their murder(s) and justifiable?

Jester is a pretty simple and straightforward person. He tends to view anything as justifiable. He takes things from every angle and isn't the quickest to anger. In a Milgram AU he'd be a bit of a frightening case because he simply could justify anything and feel nothing about doing it. In his regular canon this is beneficial.

Yet it'd make him the worse sort of person in Milgram. His whole stance would be similar to Yuno's.

"The fact I'm here and this is happening is proof enough that what I did needed to occur. You seriously think I'd get myself into this much trouble for what- Fun? If I didn't have to do it, I wouldn't have and the fact that I needed to is justification enough. There's really no need to talk about it any further than that."

Would be his only mindset about it and he would view someone else judging his behavior as a waste of his time. He's a pretty chill kid for the most part but incredibly picky about who he talks to and the opinions he allows to hold weight to him.

So, he'd probably be a standoffish prisoner if he were amongst a bunch of strangers. Not because they're murderers. Simply put he just has no interest in forming connections he doesn't want to and being forced to be around a bunch of people is the best way to make him not want to.

8. What do the voices of the outside world tell them?

"You're a really selfish person." "How could someone like you have the audacity to call yourself anyone's friend let alone theirs'." "A terrible person." "I'd feel sorry for you, but I know what happened to the last person who did that." "It must be hard..." "You seem to miss them deeply." "It gets better." "You did what you had to." "The situation was just all wrong." "I hope you feel better."

10. What is their image color?

Amaranth Purple- Amaranth would also be the flower most prominent in his birthday art.

It can represent immortality and means

"Unfading Affection" or "Everlasting Love" when given as gifts. Here's some facts about it.

X X X

11. What reoccurring themes present themselves throughout their music videos?

A lot of allusions to travel, small almost suffocatingly so rooms in large houses, superficial acts of communication that lead to increased loneliness, and a disdain for the genuine.

(I'm so fucking sorry i misread sixteen as twenty-six and I have no real explaination as to how outside of it's late and I was tired. So, now you get three ocs. I'm just adding this here to avoid confusion.)

Ah this next one may be a bit of a copout of an answer given that they are the age you asked for in real time but in their canon they're only nineteen. Hope that isn't a bother. Especially since I don't get to talk about them often. Despite them being one of my personal favorite characters to write.

His actual story is under reconstruction, and I haven't gotten to touch his character in a while as a result. technically it's being merged with another story.

Though if he did wind up in Milgram, he definitely would not be his age in canon which is why I went with his age by the current year when it comes to a Milgram au. Jester on the other hand would fuck up that young.

4. Do they view their murder(s) and justifiable?

"I didn't mean it, I didn't- mean it. This isn't the solution I wanted."

No. He does not. However, the problem was successfully solved. No one was satisfied though.

8. What do the voices of the outside world tell them?

"Your life is fucked up." "That's scary." "You deserve to stay in there." "This is just sad." "That's not how family is supposed to behave." "I don't know how to feel about this." "I want to forgive you but I also think it's safer if you stay in Milgram as long as they're not killing people at the end of this." "I'd say get therapy but that was part of the problem in this case." "Yes king dissociate harder. Reality is flawed." "In a unique twist of fate everyone here was so wrong that we've gone straight to a neutral outcome." "Those people kind of deserved it." "After a point a solution becomes a problem somehow you reached that point at birth." "Everything that could have gone wrong here went wrong. Good job team. Pack it up we can stop having things occur for this man now."

10. What is their image color?

Because I brought up a flower for Jester, I feel bad not bringing up one for Leyton.

His flower would be Azaleas.

Azaleas tend to mean Temperence and are used to remind people to take it easy.

"While azaleas represent passion, they also symbolize temperance. In other words, the plant reminds us of our ability to practice moderation — even when it comes to those things and people we love the most. You can still live a life full of love, romance, beauty, passion, and abundance while remaining level-headed and avoiding overindulgence. Self-control is a must-have in order to achieve stability and groundedness in your life. All things in moderation." X

They've also been related to family.

Something that generally makes them fit Leyton nicely.

11. What reoccurring themes present themselves throughout their music videos?

Persistence, distortion, power imbalances, responsibility, existentialism (primarily focusing on the right one has to exist and repaying those who made it possible for them to exist without question when asked), familial duty, housing, fiscal stability. Depending on his current mindset sibling relationships.

I'd love to hear your opinion on them. I love all my ocs dearly. Even though they're all a bit fucked up.

Goes up to reread ask to see if I answered correctly-

Oh, fuck you said sixteen! Damn it how did I read twenty-six. I'm sorry it's late and I'm still sick. So, I guess you're getting three ocs because it would be a waste to erase all that.

So, say hello to one of the specialist of girls,

4. Do they view their murder(s) and justifiable?

"Ha-ha, what a funny question. Do things people do need a reason or to be justifiable? It's such a immature way of looking at things... Guard, are you sure you're up for this sort of job? Not everything needs or has a justification you know. Besides even if I did have one that wouldn't make my actions any less objectively bad. Sorry, I'll stop teasing. Since I got what I wanted I'd say it was justified."

Yes, but no, but yes. If the ends justify the means then yeah she guesses what she did was justifiable but she also really has zero inclination to justify it. She's just an outcome based person.

8. What do the voices of the outside world tell them?

"You're not sorry at all!" "Your hair is super cute!" "How can you still be having a good time after doing all that." "Do you even feel empathy?" "You had way too much free time." "Well being raised like that what should we expect." "It's not bad to focus on one's own needs but..." "How exactly did you get what you wanted here this is a terrible outcome? It's a surpise you still have friends. I couldn't imagine speaking to anyone who did this ever again." "You plan to just go back and what pretend you didn't do all that?!" "YOU STILL HAVE AN ACTING CAREER BITCH! HOW?! I LOSE JOBS FOR JUST BREATHING WRONG AND YOU'RE STILL EMPLOYED!" "This is gonna be bad to say but I'm ultimately just impressed at the level of thought put into this at this point. I mean instead of being normal you truly went fuck it I'll escalate this further. Really went we can be insane together." "How the fuck is he not here- oh wait... Yeah, he's the victim." "I know voting innocent isn't going to make her better but she had me at 'Dead and gone- Oh she's crazy my love's eternal but you'll fade quickly'. I'm not fixing this I want her to get worse actually." "She's soooo normal." "This is what he would've wanted." "Toxic heteronormativity sweep!" "What you and your victim had was special. You both made each other so much worse and I have no doubt there's a universe in which he's here instead of you."

(Side note there is. If being worse was a contact sport James and Luna would be the worlds best team even though they're actually shown to be quite reasonable in their respective canons. They're both really susceptible to living in extremes. The only thing that leveled these two out was putting them in a polyamorous relationship with the nearest individual with a moral compass. However in a Milgram au one of them must be dead for the other to be here and they never spoke to that third person.)

10. What is their image color?

Her flower is Orchid the white variety mainly.

11. What reoccurring themes present themselves throughout their music videos?

The sun (in it's many forms but mainly sunlight), lack of presence, authenticity, boredom, extreme thrill seeking behavior, the feeling that there's only one opinion that matters and it's not the audience's or hers, contentment, memories.

#thanks for asking it was really fun to answer!#even though I fucked up greatly several times.

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jinx-blackout-84 · 10 months

Text

There is a notebook on your bedside table

It is full of words that you will forget are yours

They swirl in your handwriting, shaking right where you would,

And you forget that you were the one to put them there.

You forget the dark nights when your mind is too loud for sleeping

Where you feel a heavenly light clawing from your chest

You wonder, sometimes, if everyone else feels it too,

That building pressure, one that says one day you will do something great

You wonder if they have to deal with knowing

That if they do not change the world they may just die

Somewhere in the world, an artist kills themselves

There's an art inside of you

And it's begging to escape

It will pull back your ribs and ask you to plunge a knife right between your lungs

You won't bleed red, you will bleed in watercolor and ink

Even if you did bleed redIt would curl into words you never knew to say

There's something inside of you that is worth more that you ever will be

And it will escape if it kills you.

The saddest thing is that nobody would mourn your death.

They would celebrate the art.

Vincent Van Gogh killed himself.

People do not lament his death or wish he was still alive.

They hang his art in galleries.

They sell his greatest works.

Vincent Van gogh ate yellow paint full of lead and death to make his art

His art killed him slowly, every painting stealing years from him

But people do not miss him

Instead, they sell his art

So you sit in your bed and type into your notes app

You pretend that the world isn't spinning

That your time to be great isn't ticking away

Because if you leave this world without art to be remembered by, you are forgotten

Another artist kills themselves.

Thomas H. Lee was a billionaireI say was because one day he decided not to wake up again.

He was found with a gunshot wound in the side of his skull

Where will they find you?

Your time passes and you are awake far too late

Another artist kills themselves.

You learned far too young that thoughts like these weren't one you shared.

The other kids never liked them.

They thought you were an anomaly.

You were, but it hurt more than you would like to admit to see the other kids get birthday invitations.

You learned when you were older that only some people got share thoughts that hurt between your ribs.

You were not one of them.

So you had to push back against the greatness that was trying to escape

It was futile, like trying to cork a tsunami

You don't get to have thoughts like that when you're so young

Another artist kills themselves

What must you do to deserve your art

When the only way to be an artist is to die?

How can you earn the right to put your broken words onto pages

When the only way to earn that freedom is a gunshot to the temple?

How can you free the art that lives inside of you

When the most significant thing you will ever do is get buried on cold dirt

Another artist kills themselves

You have to hide away the holy light inside of you, burning within your lungs

It sits and waits for you

Because, like you have a time bomb strapped to your back,

You only have so long to be great

Before you decide to die like an artist

And kill yourself too

Van Gogh sold one painting in his life

And then he held a gun up to his head an pulled the trigger

He rots in a graveyard somewhere

Not knowing that the entire world knows his name

So you take a chance

And you pull the trigger

Maybe you'll be great too

#Poetry #Inspired by ours poetica #Tw suicide

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babysealfan · 2 years

Note

this looks fun! number 25 for fexi 😊

thank u for the prompt bestie!! I COULD have taken this to a very angsty place so I think I deserve credit for NOT doing that.....instead this got a little smutty. enjoy!

25. Exchanging Letters

Fezco had tried to break up with Lexi when she left for college.

She said no.

He had insisted that she should focus on her education and having fun, and maybe she would meet someone new while she was there.

She had insisted that she could divide her attention equally, and that there was no man in the world better than him.

So he'd sighed and let her win. He was relieved, truly—no part of him wanted them to break up, he just thought he'd give her an out, if she wanted it. Clearly, she didn't.

And Fezco turned out to be the best long distance boyfriend in the world. He didn't demand her attention, or insist that she call him every day to check in. She still did it anyway, of course, but he didn't demand anything from her. He'd text her good morning and good night, ask about her classes and her friends, and indulge in sexy FaceTimes when she called him after getting home from parties. He'd surprised her on campus for her birthday and ordered food to the library when he knew she'd be up studying late.

But Lexi's favorite part of their long distance relationship was the letters.

She had framed the first letter and displayed it on her desk, a constant reminder of how loved she was. The rest she kept in a box tucked in her closet, along with other little sentimental bits and pieces of their relationship. She'd go through her little box whenever she was missing Fezco more than usual—generally, about every other day.

Her last letter to him had been short, sweet, and to the point.

Dear Fezco,

I miss you. I can't wait to see you (two weeks!!!). I included a special treat with this letter....call me when you get it.

Love,

Lexi

One of her friends had gotten a polaroid camera, and Lexi had borrowed it to take a few risqué shots for Fezco. The mechanics of taking nudes on a polaroid turned out to be much more difficult than Lexi anticipated, and so she'd had to enlist the help of her roommate to get the perfect shot.

Fezco had greatly enjoyed the present, though he questioned how close Lexi was to her roommate, seeing how comfortable they were taking each other's nudes. He didn't care how close he was to any male friend, there was no way he'd let one of them help him take pics of his junk.

Fezco wanted to return the favor, though he knew a polaroid picture of his dick couldn't compare to the work of art that was Lexi's nude picture (and either way, she very much preferred videos).

His best option was to use his words.

He did his research, picking up some romance novels at Barnes and Noble and searching on the internet. He found a fanfiction website where, apparently, amateur writers published some pretty graphic porn. A lot of them had some good ideas that he was now looking forward to trying out. Still, baby steps...

Dear Lexi,

I miss you so much baby. I'm just thinkin bout all the things I wanna do to you when I get to see you again. Your pic was hot as fuck but ain't nothin compare to the real thing.

I be thinkin bout you in that pretty pink panty set you got. How you'd look tied up to my bed by some of those pretty hair ribbons of yours, letting me have my way with you. How many times I could make you cum before you start begging for mercy.

I also be thinkin bout how pretty you look when you ridin me. With your pretty titties bouncing and you got your head thrown back and you moanin so loud the neighbors can hear. I think about you moanin a lot, actually, think I might be addicted to that sound.

Call me when you get this, maybe I can hear it again.

Love,

Fezco

Fezco got a call from Lexi at 10 pm a few days later.

"Hi, baby," she said in a sultry voice.

"Did you get my letter?" he asked, anticipation thick in his voice.

"I did," Lexi said softly. "I read it at lunch, actually."

"Oh," Fezco's mouth dropped open.

"Yeah, it was interesting being so turned on while I was eating mac and cheese," she said with a giggle. "Where'd you learn to write like that?"

"Baby, they got hella resources like that on the internet. People be doing crazy shit," he said. "Matter fact, I got some ideas."

"Yeah?" she said. "I think you should tell me about them."

#blurbs

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polinlover · 1 year

Text

Not My Brother

By Storyhadmelike

Chapter 9

Colin stormed out of the Featherington house. Penelope was the only thing on his mind. He had to tell her. He was not going to marry Prudence. If he was going to marry anyone of course it would be Penelope.

He paused in his tracks. Marry Penelope. He knew he was not ready for marriage. Why was that again? Right! Marina Thompson and her betrayal. How could he marry after that?

He started walking slowly again not sure where he was headed. He did not see Penelope anywhere.

What was coming over him? Penelope had always been his friend but now he’s acted so foolishly. She consumed his every thought and it seemed like action.

He knew what he had to do. He must find her a husband. Colin never felt like he had a purpose in life. He traveled the world hoping the next place he went would have his attention entranced and he would suddenly know what to do. He never found that of course and would always find his way back to London.

But now with Penelope. He knew. He felt it in his soul. He was here to help her find happiness. To be her friend. Her very best friend. They would find comfortable peace. She deserved that. And he had to have her in his life. And he would find her a man to make her happy.

But first, he had to find her.

“Benedict I’m not sure I understand what you are saying,” Penelope swallowed.

“Please do not take offense when I say I do not love you. Know that when we spend time together I truly enjoy it. And I always look forward to seeing you. I know my actions may have spoken differently but…”

“Benedict,” Penelope held up her hand. “I do not love you either. I do like you.”

He nodded slowly looking at her with understanding. “That does not mean I won’t someday. Or it won’t come with time. But I’m sure for me it’s not meant to happen. And I’m okay with that. My love is with the arts. Perhaps it is like that for some people. But that doesn’t mean we can’t make each other content and happy.”

Penelope nodded in agreement. “So what are you saying?”

“I’m…” Benedict took a deep breath. “I’m asking you to marry me Penelope Featherington.”

The first thing Penelope heard was Eloise gasping. She had completely forgotten her friend was there. She looked at her.

Eloise smiled and nodded clapping. “Oh tell him yes, tell him yes!” She laughed. “We’ll all be so happy and content.”

“Yes,” Penelope heard her voice say as she looked back to Benedict. This was her life. She would be happy. Especially if Eloise would be joining them where they lived.

He smiled and took her hand placing a light kiss across her knuckles. “I will not disappoint you.”

Penelope nodded. This would be perfect. She would continue on as Lady Whistledown. Eloise would be by her side. She would discuss a partnership. No more lies between them. And Benedict could focus on his art. She looked him over. She could definitely see having children with him.

“We must tell everyone!” Eloise declared marching toward the door.

“Wait!” Benedict called after her stopping her in her tracks. “There is one issue.”

Penelope felt her heart drop. “What is it?”

“We can not announce such an engagement on our mother’s birthday,” he reasoned. “We must wait until at least tomorrow.”

Penelope nodded. She had forgotten about the ball taking place at Anthony Bridgertons tonight that would celebrate his mother’s age. It’s a masquerade.

“We must act normal tonight to let her have her night,” Eloise explained looping her arm in Penelope’s. “But then we will exclaim your marriage!”

Benedict smiled at Penelope. “This is good.”

“This is very good,” she smiled back. But she still had a sinking feeling in her heart. A longing for Colin. This she was sure would never go away.

Where the hell had she gone? Colin stomped up the stairs to number five. He had checked every store in London and every cafe. The time was getting late and he was going to be late for his mother’s birthday ball. If he did not love his mother so much he would say damn it all and just search for Penelope. Perhaps she would be there though. But there was a good chance no Featherington would show their face at a Bridgerton ball after tonight.

The butler had swung open the door as Colin reached for the knob. “Thank you,” he said shrugging off his outer coat and letting him take it away.

Colin started up the stairs to his room. He could hear Eloise laughing and singing gleefully in her room. What the bloody hell was she so happy about? He stopped to knock on her door. Perhaps he would try and soil her mood. Then as he was about to knock he stopped. He did not have to do that. What was happening to him? Why would he even consider being such an ass?

Then again he could use a laugh. Since he had gotten back. Yesterday? Was that really just a day ago? He sighed. Maybe his sibling could cheer him up.

He rose his hand up to the door and knocked. Everything went silent. Then quick footsteps came up behind the door. She cracked it. “Sister! I was ju-” Colin began.

She slammed the door in his face.

His knock came again.

“Hide,” She whisper shouted to Penelope and Benedict who both looked panicked. “It’s Colin.” Penelope started to take panic gasps and Benedict took her hand. “In here,” he pulled her into a closet. “Take a deep breath. It’s okay.” He wrapped one arm around her waist and pulled her back to his front. His other arm wrapped around her chest.

She felt better. Not great still but she could feel safe here. That was reassuring. Even though this wasn't the marriage she pictured, at least she felt safe. And warm. Dear god, he was like a heater. She was ready to get out of there. She was sure she might die of heat stroke. “You are very warm,” she told him.

“Yeah I'm like an oven,” he smiled. He placed his chin on her head listening for any signs of talking. “I wonder what he wants?” he whispered.

Eloise held the door back open. “Oh hello brother,” she laughed.

“Why did you slam the door in my face?” Colin asked taking a step into her room.

“Oh that,” She nervously tapped her fingers against her dress. “You… You gave me a fright.”

“A fright?”

“Oh yes! I completely forgot you had come home. I thought you were a ghost,” she started laughing hard.

“A ghost,” He looked around her room. What was she being so happy about before he came here? “What is new?” He glanced up at her with a smile.

“Nothing is new.”

“Really I heard you up here. Sounded like good news? I could use something like that at a time like this.”

“Oh? That? Yes,” she cleared her throat. “Have you ever had a splinter in your finger for days? Well, I have and just got it out. See?” She held up her index finger.

He squinted at it. “There is nothing there.”

“Of course not, that’s the point,” She laughed.

“That’s really why you sounded so happy?”

“Yes, brother. Now I must get ready for the ball tonight. And so must you. Go,” She explained pushing him out of the door. She shut it behind him.

Why didn't she ask about the engagement? Penelope flipped to Benedict. He looked down at her. “She didn't ask about the engagement to Prudence.”

“Well, how was she supposed to know if it just happened?” He reasoned.

“That's a good point,” Penelope nodded. They were close she noticed. Very close. And he was looking down at her.

“You know we are betrothed,” he whispered. “Alone in a closet. Could be a chance for us to… You know?”

“No I do not know,” she shook her head.

“We can try to spark a romance. Have our first kiss?” he suggested. He pressed her gently against the door.

“Would this marriage include that kind of… stuff?” she gulped.

“I am not a blind man. I intend to stay true to you once married. You are very fetching. Also, how do you think we are supposed to have children?”

“I did not think that far ahead,” her eyes seemed far away in thought.

“I’d like to kiss you if you’d like to kiss me?” he smiled down bringing his head just inches from hers.

Would she like to kiss him? She is going to marry him. He is very attractive. She could indulge and see how this played out. Perhaps they did not need love. Perhaps passion existed in its place and they would have that.

“Kiss me,” she nodded.

But he did not kiss her. Instead, they both billowed out of the closet and into Eloise's room as she opened the door.

“Oof,” Penelope grunted hitting the floor. Benedict landed on top of her.

“We could be very happy in this marriage,” he smiled his nose meeting hers.

“Get a room,” Eloise teased with a sigh.

“We intend to,” Benedict snarled playfully yanking Penelope up with him. “But I suppose we should wait until we are married,” he sighed. He cupped his fiance’s face. “You are very nice to look at.”

Penelope blushed. Hard.

“Okay, okay,” Eloise started to push him towards the door. “I must call for a carrier to retrieve Pen’s dresses for tonight so we can get ready. Go get ready yourself.”

“Okay, but before we leave for the party I would like to have just a moment alone with her,” Benedict pleaded.

“Fine,” Eloise nodded.

#eloise bridgerton #bridgerton #bridgertonseason3 #colin bridgerton #benedict bridgerton #penelope featherington #polin #polin fic #penelope x colin #colin x penelope #notmybrother

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mylittle-sunshine · 3 months

Text

Today is my dad's birthday and in three days will be his death anniversary. I don't really know how I am supposed to feel about this and it's been two years now. It's kinda weird not to have him around but at the same time, I have forgotten what it feels like to have my best friend alive.

From time to time, I just remember that he was there. Sometimes I can smell his perfume (Sauvage by Dior, which means almost every dude's perfume) and feel him, which makes me sad because I miss him so very deeply. But at the same time, when I realise that I haven't thought about him for days, it makes me wanna punch myself.

I have blamed myself for a long time for his death. I had dreams about him dying months before and I had my teeth hurting so hard and falling in my dreams that even during the days it would put me into pain.

When I saw him that morning, I tried to bring him back to life by doing CPR but it was too late and i blamed myself for not doing it properly or maybe for having manifested it somehow through my dreams. I guess I just needed to blame someone because it felt so unfair to lose him when he was the type of man who deserved all the love on earth and a long peaceful life.

I blamed myself because I also saw the signs of death, but chose to ignore them. He has always been sort of hyperactive but during that time, he looked tired and in his own world. He was never much of a religious man but he opened his mind suddenly one or two weeks before. He would zone out and I remember his last Monday that he forgot to pick me up. I was so fucking scared and I called him and he was like "I'm so sorry, I fell asleep. I need to tell you something really important. I'm coming." When he arrived, he was mad but I didn't know why and he had forgotten that he had something to tell me. This is probably far-fetched, but what if he was warning me because he knew? He started teaching my mum how to drive again because it had been 10 years since she last drove. The day before he died, he repaired all of our broken furniture, observed birds with me and smoked. The night arrived and I had a fight with my mum because she was organising holidays and I told her that it is useless to foresee it because we don't know what is gonna happen tomorrow. It was way too early. I said goodnight, that I love them and my father watched a documentary about Angela Merkel on Arte alone.

I woke up during the night, felt the urge to go downstairs. Like something was leading me that way but I fell back asleep. When I woke up in the morning, I felt attracted to his room and thought it weird that he was still sleeping. Then I heard my mum screaming and for a second, I thought they were joking. I knew, he knew. But we didn't know.

I don't like to talk about him. Whenever my mum brings him into the conversation I just need to leave. I cannot hear about him because it feels like it's too soon, but when will it not be?

My birthday was not long after that and I was mad at him for leaving me, as selfish as it may sound, because I needed him.

He will never get to see me as a real adult. He will never know if I make my dreams come true, will never meet the love of my life, my children and will never give me that dance at my wedding.

He will forever be my dad and my best friend, but also just a ghost, a character from the stories that i will tell my future family.

Joyeux anniversaire papa.

Je t'aime <3

#dad #short story #storytime #grief #tw grief

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tinatribeca · 9 months

Text

Life Update 9/4/23

Blessed. I have realized to be grateful for everything that I do have in a time like this. Loneliness has been a state of mind for a very long time but I'm happy to say that although I am now at 3 years single, I'm not feeling as lonely. I have my moments but I am trying to embrace the fact that I am a single girl in one of the largest cities in the world and I'm blessed to be alive given everything I have been through this passed year. My mental health is also a lot better.

I'm definitely on dating apps and find myself swiping occasionally but I hate it. I'm so picky and with age I think I've grown to be even more picky. I pay all my bills, I have my own place, career, hobbies, I'm a musician, I like to travel, I like to be at peace...

I need an addition. Not a takeaway. I need an addition that also respects the art world.

I've been going on dates. I always find something wrong with them, and usually never see them again. I'm trying to have more of an open mind.

Maybe the person for me is not on a dating app.

I'm waiting to be sitting at Starbucks where a Michael B Jordan lookalike walks up to me and starts talking about how much he also loves cubism art, iced caramel macchiatos, and Don Miguel Ruiz.

I doubt that will ever happen.

I speak to my mom often. We are a lot better than we were earlier this year. She is doing a lot better. She seems happy.

I deleted a few post from harder times a while back, which I regret because I can't look back at them and have my moment of self reflection BUT... why live in regret? I deleted a lot of my previous life updates which sucks but I'm back at it again and hoping to give as many as I can so that I can really reflect and utilize my blog.

Living alone in New York has taught me a lot. I've seen my super more times this year than I've seen my own mother. This apartment has its moments where it takes work to upkeep like yesterday the toilet was flushing non stop... I could literally hear it flushing from my bedroom.

Take a rent stabilized apartment in Brooklyn and you will definitely have the quirkiest moments.

I don't see my friends as often which sucks. Every one is doing their own thing. I'm starting to get used to this. Adulthood.

I took my father to dinner Friday for his birthday. a $200 birthday gift, he ordered every appetizer her wanted, dinner, dessert, you name it lol. I allowed it, he deserved it.

There was a guy at the next table checking me out in front of his girlfriend, also in front of my dad. It was flattering. A moment of me realizing hey, I must be attractive. The guy proceeded to also involve himself in me and my fathers conversations occasionally. At a specific point I thought to myself he might as well have sat in my lap. Me and my dad laughed about it once they left. I'm glad we both can laugh at things that other parents wouldn't find funny.

I didn't mention my father has cancer.

I haven't told many people. I didn't tell him that he looks more tired lately. We took a shot together that night and it was a reminder of him still being here. My father has always been someone I consider very close to me. Its hard knowing he's getting older and I pray that he heals and gets passed this diagnosis. There are moments where I am afraid he won't see me get married, have kids... The what if comes to mind.

I try to be honest in these posts but its hard knowing that in times where I'm thinking:

Wow I surpassed a lot...

Something else comes up. Another hiccup. Another moment of:

Shit. There goes life trying to kick my ass again.

He has a lot more testing to do and I'm here, hoping for the best.

Nevertheless, I am fine. Good even. I'm starting to accept the things I cannot change. This year was also a hard health year for me too - mentally, physically, etc. I had a lot of moments where I was very upset with life.

I'm in a better place accepting and embracing all things I cannot change. Hopefully next life update I have nothing but good news.

#thoughts

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vincentbengtson · 2 years

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One Hundred Days In Lockdown, 100 Pics From Around South Africa

Have pals who joined Bird life South Africa on this trip. BirdlLife SA deserves every accolsde for organising Flock to Marion taking1500 avitourists on a once-in-a-lifetime voyage on a cruise ship to Marion Island, one of the Prince Edward Island group and a South African international territory. Never before has a cruise ship ventured into this a half of the Southern Ocean, making this a world first. He gained the 3-day match in the fifth set and is now ranked #18 on the planet. Prince group players Mike and Bob Bryan are on the verge of changing into the staff with the all-time most doubles wins. Looking to seize their 62nd ATP title, they reached the Wimbledon quarter finals this 12 months. During the event six Prince 6000 machines and one Prince PTC machine helped to string and customize almost racket’s for the world’s most discerning tennis players. Steve Young has been appointed Reebok SA’s marketing manager and Shannon Bouwer is responsible for PR and Communications. His passion has led him to meet unimaginable people and be concerned in some memorable reveals, together with Fiela’s child, Oklahoma, You’re a Good Man Charlie Brown, The Producer’s, Hairspray, and South Pacific. Neil is an expert sound engineer, and likes long walks on the seashore. Andréa has been on the stage – taking half in musical instruments, dancing, performing, and singing – since age three. A really distinctive experience.Albatross Thursday will be remembered by each passenger. An once in a lifetime journey that I will cherish forever. Besides being a incredible as soon as in a lifetime experience. It was so rewarding to see the the overwhelming desire of our fellow travellers dedication to right the wrongs we've carried out to Mother Nature prior to now. He has been at it for twenty years now, and he feels that it’s About Time he brought out his own album. And hell it is, because time is of essence, Mnisi calls this a 20 years Celebration. All In One is comprised of Steve Newman, Errol Dyers and Hilton Schilder who first shared the stage in an improvised session at the Ubuntu Festival held to celebrate the 91st birthday of Nelson Mandela in 2009. Morag Tison is employed as a professional Stage Manager, and has worked on many Ballets, Operas and Musicals, as nicely as at KKNK and National Arts festivals. But her love of theatre, and particularly musicals, started with Amateur Dramatic societies, and he or she continues to work on them every time her professional shows allow. She loves the wonderful environment and camaraderie of those that do it not for cash, however for the love of theatre. The ambiance was electrical with a massive crowd to support both groups. Before the match started, each school’s grade 8s performances their skit which began the match on a excessive. The anticipated hype around the K-Day fixture was played out in front of a packed viewers on Saturday. Both groups gave their all from the very begin in a brutally intense encounter. He added that even on the doctoral degree, the extent of dishonesty is intolerably excessive, and many students no longer engage in original considering. Another symptom of lack of integrity within the Nigeria tertiary establishments is examination malpractice which has turn into a norm in many institutions of upper studying. The situation is worse as a rising number of lecturers get involved in dishonest practices corresponding to plagiarism, cooking data for research with out conducting the research, lateness to class, absenteeism, and alteration of examination outcomes . The state of affairs in the academic environment has reached a degree when different dons fraudulently obtained educational awards . Mommy I my love for you'll all the time stay in my heart.I am who I am as a result of all of your love and steerage.I am proud to say that I am your daughter.Your loving daughter.Gail. Dad, 3 years on and time has not made it any easier. Continue to overlook you and need you could be a half of my boys' lives. Thinking of you on this present day, and each different. You're in my heart and in my ideas everyday Mom. We shared many miles collectively, both on and off the road, and we'll nonetheless share many extra. Without info, informed selections cannot be made. We also consider there is not any justification for criminalising the sharing of information . For more details about the Right2Know campaign visit Click here to view a slideshow of the march. The New Balance 759 road running shoe was named as a “Best Update” by Women’s Running magazine. dr gregory The twins are on a 14-match winning streak after coming into the US Open with back-to-back titles at Toronto and Cincinnati. They also broke the Open Era report for many tour-level doubles titles won by a group with their 62nd victory in Los Angeles. The Bryan brothers qualified and are the defending champions of this year’s World Tour Finals held in London from the of November. The Bryan Brothers Foundation donated $10,000 to Flood Relief in Pakistan in hopes that other tennis followers and Americans will send along some much needed dollars to help the individuals who have been devastated by the latest storms. Boxing as a tool to deal with abuse and to promote social change in different cultures had been explored during a recent unique project change programme in Johannesburg. Six representatives from the globally funded Sport for Good Foundation Project Fight for Peace - “Luta pela Paz” - in Rio de Janeiro, Brazil, lately visited the SA Sport for Good Foundation project Fight with Insight in Johannesburg.

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marvelous-imagines · 4 years

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Imagine Johnny that the reader is Johnny's girlfriend and is a typical Nerd who loves to read comic books and is addicted to games and her friends end up making fun of her

considering I'm a huge nerd YES AND DONE LOVE!

Johnny Lawrence x reader

Warnings: mild language. Slight angst. Fluff!

You couldn't help the wide excited smile that bloomed on your face, pure joy engulfing you warmly as you looked into the full length mirror, taking in your new shirt. The bold lettering that read captain America along with the majestic figure himself in his signature stance with the American flag blowing around behind him as he held his glorious shield. The shirt was art, beautiful and truly a masterpiece... And it's yours, thanks to your boyfriend.

"johnny I love it!" you exclaimed happily, turning back to look at the blond, his grin wide as he watched you while leaned against the wall of your bedroom.

"I thought you would, when I saw it through the store window I knew it was something you'd want" he shrugs cooly, "although you're lucky no one saw me in the nerdy store full of losers" he jokes while pushing off the wall and walking over to you, placing his hands on your waist.

"now johnny... Are you calling me a loser?" you ask him, eye's locking on his baby blues.

"not you, you're my beautiful little nerd" he leans down so his face is closer to yours. You smirk and quickly peck him on the lips before pulling away from him and looking back at the shirt.

"thanks for the shirt Johnny, I love it!" you say ecstatic. Johnny let's out a chuckle and swiftly wrapped his arms around your waist from behind.

"I think I deserve a kiss for my good deeds" he spoke while nuzzling his face into your neck. His breath tickling the skin there which causes you to giggle.

"if I gave you a kiss Lawrence you would definitely turn it into a 14 minute make out session and I have 3 minutes to arrive at Tiffany's house before I'm late" you placed your hands over his that was resting on your hips. He groans as he looks at you through the mirror.

"do you have to go to Tiffany's?" he questioned with a pout, and when he gave you the puppy eye's you almost wanted to bail out on your plans so you could stay with your boyfriend.

"yes, I promised I'd help her do birthday planning for her younger sister, then after we've planned shopping" you say reluctantly pulling away from Johnny's warm strong arms. He whines and nods in understanding.

"okay, I'll call you tonight babe" he said while walking to your bedroom door, "love ya y/n" he was his last words before he left. You smile fondly at where he once stood before grabbing your shoes and heading out the door as well.

You giggled loudly at your two friends Rebecca and Tiffany, while you all was seated on Tiffany's sofa while planning her younger sisters upcoming birthday party. You three had been laughing and joking around, talking more about boys then planning the actual party.

"last weekend me and Tommy went on our third date" Rebecca said with a smile. Tiffany let's a teasing grin spread across her face as she focuses her attention on the red head seated in between you both.

"oh, what happened on this date?" Tiffany wiggled her eyebrows in suggestive manner. You roll your eyes at your friend and smack her shoulder playfully.

"like I'd ever tell you anything tattle tale" Rebecca snorts, picking up the notebook full of ideas for the birthday and jotting something down before tossing it back on the table.

"oh c'mon, isn't Tommy apart of that badass karate thingy? He's a total badass!"

"my boyfriend knows karate too Tiffany" you decide to join the conversation with a little smile, just the thought of Johnny making your heart skip a beat.

Tiffany scoffs, shaking her head. "y/n sweetie we're talking about actual guys, not some comic book guys you have a crush" you lift a brow at her harsh tone. Of course your friends wasn't fond of comics as much as you was. They often teased you for liking comics, calling you childish and nerdy. But they was still your friends and you suffered through the constant teasing and insults.

"she's actually dating Johnny Lawrence, that cute blond boy you drool over at school" Rebecca spoke up as you just simply grabbed the notebook and jot down some ideas for Tiffany.

That seemed to make her choke on air nearly as she had wide eye's. "he's dating her?! The nerdy, quite little -

"what's so bad about being nerdy?" you cut her off angrily as you tossed the notebook aside and crossed your arms. Starting to feel offended by her this time.

"it's lame, all the comic books, the stupid dolls you collect - even that stupid shirt! It's childish y/n. You need to grow up" Tiffany spat out harshly, leaving you feeling a wave of hurt weigh down on you. What if she was right?

"it's not childish -

You tried to explain but she cuts you off with a laugh, "and all you do is play stupid video games, you spend more time in comic stores and arcades then hanging out with actual people" she laughed, Rebecca stifling a laugh beside you which has you feeling even worse. You thought they was your friends...they didn't understand just how amazing comics was, they was a escape, a slice of peace from chaos every once in a while. And video games was fun, a nice way to relax after a long day.

"you guys just don't get it... The two things are awesome" you grumbled quietly.

"awesome? You're a nerd y/n, I don't even see why Johnny would date you" her and Rebecca laughed loudly as you feel tears start to build up in your eye's. You stand up and storm out of the door, your tears you tried holding back escaping.

It was nearly 15 minutes later when you arrived home, laying on your bed and taking in what your friends said. Why would Johnny date you? You was a nerd, you loved superheroes and video games. Your friends was right... You was childish, you sat up and take your captain america shirt off and slip on a plain t-shirt and lay back down. Johnny was a total badass and deserved someone better then you, someone who he was most likely ashamed of being seen with.

As you laid in your bubble of self loathing a knock on your bedroom door disturbs you. "go away!" you said loudly while you swing a arm over your eye's while you laid on your back.

"geez you sound so happy to see me" the familier sound of your boyfriend said, "it's Johnny, i left my wallet in you're room I think, I can't find anywhere else..." he spoke from the other side of the door.

You sigh and stay in your position, "come in" the sound of the door opening then closing was the only thing heard, soon followed by Johnny's voice once more.

"why aren't you wearing the shirt I got you?" he asks while picking it up off the floor and sitting on the edge of your bed, "what's wrong?" you slowly move your arm off your eyes and look at him. He instantly saw the sadness swimming in your eye's.

"do you think I'm childish?" you ask him quietly, slowly sitting up in bed and looking at him. He gives you a confused look before shaking his head.

"no, why would I?" he says while playing with the shirt in his hands, his eyes roaming your face trying to understand what's wrong.

"because I'm a nerd... I'm a loser Johnny, I don't even know why you're dating someone like me" you said with growing irritation at yourself. Johnny placed the shirt on the bed at gives you a stern look.

"I'm with you because I love y/n. I love everything about you, I love you for you" johnny said while scooting closer to you and placing his hand on your cheek, forcing you to look at him, his eyes holding nothing but truth, "what even made you think like this?" he murmured. You let out a deep breath while leaning into his touch.

"Tiffany and Rebecca" you muttered while looking away from his gorgeous blue eyes. He sighs and scoops you up in his arms and placing you in his lap, you was surprised by the abrupt movement but soon melt into his loving arms that was wrapped around your waist.

"if they were guys and kick their ass's for making you even think for a moment that you're a loser" he said causing you to giggle a little. But he continues with a serious look, "you're not a loser, you're cool and I love that you like video games and comics... It shows that you have a fun a personality and not a boring one like Tiffany and Rebecca's" he placed a kiss on your nose, you giggle at him and lay your head on his shoulder.

"I love you Johnny, you're the absolute best" you muttered while closing your eyes and basking in his loving embrace.

"I love you too y/n, every little detail" he muttered back, running his hand up and down your back. You truly did love Johnny, no one in the world could make you as happy as him, even when you felt down....

A/n: it's short as usual and shity, even I know that bruh😭 but here it is, I wrote it while suffering through a party (I have really bad anxiety and hate crowds so I write while standing in a corner to prevent panic attacks)

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alluringjae · 3 years

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until dawn; pt. II - ljn

part I | part II

⤑ summary: basic number one rule of the museum is not to touch the art. but no one told jeno that falling for one of them isn’t allowed either.

⤑ pairing: jeno x female reader

⤑ word count: 12.2k

⤑ genre: ANGST, fluff, romance, smut (f receiving, dom!jeno waow, dirty talk, wrap it everyone) | broke architecture major!jeno, historical figure!reader, enemies to lovers!au, college!au, night at the museum-inspired!au

⤑ warnings: references to actual historical figures, explicit language, graphic details, major heartbreak caused by another party, expect time jumps too

⤑ author’s note: happy jeno day!! i’ve been so excited to post this part, and i’m happy we’re here!! perhaps, this is the last long fic i’ll write for a while so i can rest, but i’ll still be posting short stories within the weeks to come! i’m excited for may to say the least hehe

btw, for the smut scene (indicated with **), i highly recommend you listen to strange (feat. hillary smith) by kris bowers!! this song is from the bridgerton soundtrack, and oh man, the feels!!

with that, enjoy!

italicized text either means they are personal notes or flashbacks.

this was meant to be more angsty, but either way, i screamed every time i wrote something gut-wrenching.

⤑ taglist: @renjunniehome

⤑ ctto above!!

⤑ leave me some feedback, constructive criticism, or hellos!

“You ready to get your butt beaten by me, Lee?”

“Prepare your final words when I win instead, (Y/L/N).”

Mischievous banter exchanged between you two became a new norm. Almost every night, someone within the art pieces established a contest over anything and it released the competitive sides of you two. So far, Jeno has been winning. Not like it hurt your pride, but maybe just once, you could conquer one game to feel better. Not only that, there’s a mini penalty for the loser. So far, you’ve cleaned up the lobby yourself and acted cutely to everyone the entire evening (or aegyo as Jeno called it).

Tonight, a game of archery was held by the Greek gods. They pushed away any extra pieces away, leaving the whole room vacant with two boards right beside Zeus’ throne. Numerous arrows were produced and sharpened, Zeus in the center announced to everyone participating.

“It’ll be 1 on 1 games. First to go are Jeno vs (Y/N), followed by Athena vs. Hermes, Cleopatra vs. Freddie, and last would be Hades vs Aphrodite.”

Cutting the chase, you didn’t expect Jeno to be that good at archery. Sure, he told you that he took classes with his friends for fun when he was younger, though it showed that he’s a fast learner and even hit one bullseye in the middle of the game.

Not slightly threatened until the last rounds, you fixed your aim and lessened your overthinking when preparing to shoot. Thus, you scored 2 bullseyes shot. It was a close fight, having the audience on the edge on their feet again because it’s the two of you. Your dynamic with the night guard always elevated the mood, shifting their bets over and over again.

By 1 point, you received your first victory against Jeno. Unlike you, he showcased his sportsmanship sweetly without any comments of disbelief. He’s never bragged about anything big in his life, not unless it’s a high grade for his plate. Normally, he celebrated wins in a laid-back manner. But don’t be fooled: he loves giving penalties.

“This is why I don’t make bets with my friends because I really go for their weak spots.”

“You’re cynical, Lee Jeno.”

“Only if you’re close to me, (Y/N) (Y/L/N).”

“Aren’t we already past that stage?”

Almost halfway through his job, he sustained a meaningful friendship with you. Out of everyone, you were his default person to hang out within the nights he had a shift. If he wasn’t present, he made sure to give you small treats or gifts as much as possible. An innocent friendship, it was that the world would’ve never believed in.

Or was it?

“To celebrate your win, what do you want me to do?”

“You’re too kind for me to play around with, even if you’re the complete opposite of me.”

“I’ll make it simple and worthwhile since I don’t know when I’ll win a game again.” As your finger tapped your temple as you pondered deeply, a smart idea came through. “Grant me 3 wishes.”

He chuckled, lowering himself to view you better. “Am I like some genie now to you?”

“No room to complain, I won, didn’t I?” You grinned, raising one brow to show your dominance.

“You’re petty in your own way, aren’t you?”

“Perhaps. Now come on, I want to use my first wish.” You shrugged it off like no big deal, loving the high feeling of triumph. You lead him to the center of the lobby, where a beautiful grand piano only selected people get to play during exhibits. “Open the museum piano.”

Ever since you were brought to life, you never used it. Tempting but because people from the outside might here, maybe it’s time to try something new. A new challenge, and besides, you missed entertaining people through it. The last time you touched the delicate piano keys was to your family before you ran away.

It’s a good thing that in the shackle of keys Jeno held, the needed key was there. Unlocking the lustrous black instrument, you sat by the matching black bench. Crackling your fingers, you tested by pressing a few keys to get the hang of it again.

“What are you planning to play, (Y/N)?” Jeno leaned against the side, his arms crossed.

Humming the first notes of your piece, the nostalgia ran through your veins. “Nocturne No. 2 in E flat by Chopin.”

Your fingers took off and played each chord slowly and calmly. This piece reminded you the most of your mother, who sat by the couch in front of your old piano with your father while guests from the party they hosted crowded around you. Being the youngest, they often requested you to perform as entertainment so you always put your best foot forward. Or so you tried.

Nevertheless, no one else in your family was capable to play this piece as perfectly as you. By the way your eyes closed and your body swayed to the mellow tune, Jeno observed how you memorized this piece by heart. A passionate flame you were, outshining every pianist out there.

He wasn’t surprised at how multi-talented you were, though there’s a different kind of aura you present when you played the instrument. From your hard and tough front, you could be soft and sweet to the right people.

In a way, you showed your comfort toward the boy by serenading him with the piano. Sketching him with him in the past was one thing, but this was another. You’d sketch with people you’ve grown used to, but you play piano to people you want to cherish in your life. As dangerous as it seems, Jeno was someone special to you, only wanting to have good moments with him.

Junmyeon will always have a huge part in your museum life, but Jeno filled the emptiness that he left behind. This loneliness for a human friend vanquished thanks to Jeno, and you didn’t want to jeopardize it at all. Sure, whenever he acted like a gentleman around you, let you inside the Foreign Art Room, or brought you food sometimes, you couldn’t help feel honored.

Though lately, every time he showed off his strength when he defeated Zeus and Hades during an arm wrestle game the god held again. You seriously had to catch a breath at every flex his arms made, like the goddesses. Maybe how he pushed his black hair back when he’s drawing another plate, you’d give yourself a few extra seconds to see his long fingers skim through them. He’d bit his lower lip when he’s in too deep with his creativity, wondering if he’d bite the lower lip of the girl he’d ki-

All right, (Y/N), relax. Maybe you’re thinking this way because it’s been decades since your last relationship. You wouldn’t want to fall for another possible trap and hurt yourself again, right?

Ever since this job, Jeno’s university life drastically changed. Yes, he still hung out with his friends and performed extremely well in his classes, though he prioritized anything related to the museum wherever he was. If they were drinking out, he’d buy an extra bottle of soju for you on his way back to the dorm. Rarely does he get shitfaced anyways.

If he and Renjun visited the bookstore to purchase pens or any art-related materials, he always bought either an extra sketchpad or set of pens. Even if you were simply a figure to everyone else, he appreciated the bond you both developed.

Every night, he’d tell you about his day from the start. Normally, it consisted of a lot of schoolwork and coffee, some stories about his roommates too. Speaking of them, he’d insert a lot of humorous words about his entire group of friends, whom you learned their names too.

Mark, Jaemin, Renjun, Jisung, Chenle, and Donghyuck, each of them presented a different color in their group. Jeno, who’d admitted to being shy and quiet, grew out of his shell because of them. A friend of Jeno’s would automatically be a friend of yours, if only you were allowed to leave the museum or become a human.

Jeno learned more about your past explorations that never got documented because you no longer had an interest in jotting them down. They were adventures you’d kept to yourself, memories only close to you then would know. Except now, Jeno was another addition. You’re not the type to instantly open to people, though again, a sense of relief surrounded him every time you encounter each other. It grew gradually like a warm hug, softening your heart and breaking your walls.

The more he spent time with you, nothing feared Jeno the slightest. He’s always maintained himself intact, avoiding lines to be crossed and giving respect to those who deserve it. However, he began to question himself where exactly his feelings lie with you after Jaemin tried to set him up on a blind double date just so the best friend of his date wouldn’t feel left out.

He’s rarely one to get crushes on people, even when other girls in his college openly showed their affection towards him. Valentine’s Day or his birthday, several girls sent him chocolate or flowers. Jaemin and Renjun got sick of girls reaching out to them first so they could reach him. It’s not because he’s not the dating type, but because he’s so goal-oriented that unlike his roommates, he doesn’t have a slight clue about dating.

Though one-night stands while at a party and dating were completely different, he’d still say he had experience with girls. Plus having an older sister, he never took advantage of them. He’d rather tell them in person that the feelings weren’t mutual than ghosting them. He’s not like Jaemin anyways.

With that, he’s so lost when his heart beats twice as fast the second you’ve woken up from your posing slumber. He doesn’t comprehend how flustered he’d be when you highly insist to help him with his plate or how cute he finds it when you’re playing fetch with Mochi. On top of it, when you chose to sketch each other for one of your sketching sessions, he’d take a longer stare at your visage before he drew some strokes.

A lot of historical accounts mentioned how your beauty was the standard of the Victorian era, wherein you were the jewel of your neighborhood and numerous men wanted your hand. Women envied you, especially having high intelligence skills that were equivalent to a man. That time, that felt like a threat to most men. Though surprisingly, it turns out there were men who liked intelligent girls.

Jeno knew he liked you as a friend, though liking you past that he didn’t intend. Nor was it allowed because it’ll break one of the golden rules. Before he’d go beyond contemplating, he had to stop himself. This was so unlike him. The feelings will fleet away, he’d repeat to himself. Don’t waste a great friendship because of your silly emotions.

Individually, both of you swallowed these harboring feelings down your guts and simply kept your friendship status safe. Doing your typical activities or whatever else you could think of, none of you minded to change it whatsoever.

Unknown to you though, it was obvious to the other art pieces ones that you two practically passed off as young lovers. Although they know that pushing one towards the other went against the rules, Aphrodite begged to differ.

“Holding them back from expressing what they really feel just because of the law here is a tragedy. They should at least try, you know?”

On another typical night, Jeno invited you to the Theater Room for a movie marathon. After finding out that you’ve never seen any moving pictures, he wanted to be there to introduce it. Luck was on his side to not have plates or requirements due for the week and everyone was behaving themselves, so he started with rolling out short films from the 88mm projector. Having premade popcorn and drinks, the two of you shared roars of laughter and emotional tears.

Switching to the cd player for longer and clearer films, you’d opt to believe that you were born at the wrong time. With all these advancements, it came with a lot of new beliefs. One of them was allowing women to study and work. Then again, she was a pioneer according to historians. Without her, it wouldn’t help shape society as it is today.

Nonetheless, this movie Jeno played on the big screen was what he defined as “one of the classics”, 10 Things I Hate About You.

This outspoken character named Kat was presenting a poem to her class, trying to hold in her raw emotions towards Patrick, the boy who broke her heart. Too engaged, you didn’t notice how Jeno stretched his arms out so he could wrap one around your shoulder. Not that you were complaining, his warmth reassuring you safety.

“I hate the way you talk to me, and the way you cut your hair. I hate the way you drive my car. I hate it when you stare. I hate your big dumb combat boots and the way you read my mind. I hate you so much it makes me sick; it even makes me rhyme. I hate it, I hate the way you're always right. I hate it when you lie.” The way she attempted to keep her strong ground only reminded you of where you were weeks ago, especially once she excruciatingly broke down.

“I hate it when you make me laugh, even worse when you make me cry. I hate it when you're not around, and the fact that you didn't call. But mostly I hate the way I don't hate you. Not even close, not even a little bit, not even at all.” Only when you leaned back to the chair, you felt his arm. His thumb caressing your covered shoulder, you peeked him a little bit. His eyes fixated on the screen, absorbed in the acting and how Kat’s tears weren’t scripted as she stormed out of the classroom.

Not that you were her, but it sparked the past memory of how you merely disliked him because of his job. But as a person, not even close, not even once did you hate him. How blessed that he never judged you for it, staying patient all this time.

Right before he could look back at you, you moved your face back to resume your watching. Jeno definitely noticed what you did, though not sure as to why. Whatever it was, it wasn’t harmful.

Once the film ended, Jeno checked his watch for the time. 4 am, he wanted to do something else now instead of film viewing. You were on par with it, wanting to walk it out after being seated for hours. As you both cleaned up and bid the posters outside goodbye, the doors to the museum were locked unexpectedly. Impossible on Jeno’s half because he had the keys for every room, but he double-checked his bunch.

Alas, the keys for these doors specifically were missing. But there was no other way anyone could’ve gotten it, plus it’s not like the last person he talked to, which was Aphrodite, would need it.

Or did she?

Rather than putting any blame on each other, your only wish now was to return to your section before sunrise. You and he could just relax momentarily before yelling for help.

“Maybe we should watch another film first?”

“Alright, you choose while I return the rest.”

As Jeno inserted the cd of Cinema Paradiso inside, the background music of the opening played. He hummed the first notes, already feeling the love from this film. Another must-see classic as recommended by Renjun, he wanted to rewatch it with you.

Slowly returning each cd and film roll to their respective drawers, the melodious theme had you waltzing in the small space. Even beyond your life, classical music never gets old. Aging like fine wine, sounding spectacular as time passes because of people’s creativity.

Jeno gazed over your sudden movements, smiling uncontrollably at how immersed you were as you multi-tasked. However, you took a wrong turn by the desk and almost dropped a priceless film roll. But before you fully slipped and fell, a pair of strong arms caught you at the right time. Panting from the nerves, mostly when he was inches from your face. Never has he pressed his body this close to you to protect you, and never have you seen his captivating eyes this up close.

As enchanting as the background music of Ennio Morricone was, it only became noise once Jeno took ahold of the film roll on your hand and placing down on the desk. Taking another step closer, you were backed up by the edge. Not to mention how his height dignified his impact on you, your arms were still situated by your side with nowhere else to go.

That was until his finger elevated your chin so he could meet you on eye-to-eye level. His other hand gripping your waist, you became brave enough to place your hands by his broad shoulders. Licking your lips, you glanced at his lips quickly. But he noticed it, and as risky as this was, it was a leap of faith to take.

“May I kiss you?”

Always such a gentleman, even when he already knew how much you desired him through your returning affections. Calming your breath patterns by the speed of everything occurring, you came back to your senses. He’s the one who constantly told you not to forget your roots, so you were going to take this one.

You trust him, and he does too.

“Yes.”

Since the first film, some kind of tension increased the closer he moved or intimate his actions were towards you. You kept pushing it back in hopes not to ruin what you both have. But it only turned out to be mutual, especially how none of you held back as soon as his lips passionately clashed yours.

Tangling your arms around his neck, you stood on your tiptoes to press even closer to him. Feeling his lively heart pumping against your hollow chest, you bit his lower lip. Something you’ve secretly craved to do, he growled from the pleasure. He hoisted your waist to the desk, his impatient hands earnestly traveling all over your body. While your legs locked around his torso, your feisty nature leaned back so your entire body lied on the small desk.

Jeno was on top, placing one hand down to hold himself while the other squeezed your waist firmly. Even if you’re made of wax, you’re like an actual living woman at night. Everything about you becomes real until dawn. You emitted vulgar moans, giving him more access to your neck. Peppering a mix of soft to hard kisses, your hand teasingly snaked under his shirt. He really wasn’t joking when he bragged that he was quite ripped since he enjoyed sports and going to the gym, cupping a part of his toned abdomen.

“If you want something, all you have to do is ask.” He sluggishly sucked the area between your ear and neck, one of your weakest spots. “What’s on your mind, baby?”

The growing moistness in between your legs left a stain in your panties, trying to close your legs out of embarrassment. It’s been decades since you’ve been stimulated like this. However, Jeno beat you to it as he trailed the hand that was on your waist and lowering it right above your covered sex. He cupped it agonizingly slow, making you folding your leg from the pleasure. For a man who doesn’t date around, he knew exactly what he’s doing.

“I just kissed you, and you’re already this soaked. Can you handle me, baby?”

As the strong woman that you present yourself to be, it would selfishly take the right touch from the right man to weaken you. With his savage lips back on yours while your hands clutched on his shirt, he was simply waiting for a verbal answer, yet driving you completely mad. Everything was happening so fast, and here he was to please you in anywhere you seem fit.

You were deprived, and oh, you needed it more than ever.

However, seconds before you replied, there was loud rumbling from the main doors which stopped your devilish antics. As Jeno moved back from you to see the ruckus, you lifted yourself back up, pulling back your dress sleeves and flattening out the creases. The last thing you wanted was a trail of familiar red marks from the aggressive male, finding any reflective surfaces to check.

“I wouldn’t be that dumb to leave you hickies now, would I?” Jeno ended your worries as he placed his hands by your side again. His face leaned towards yours again, reliving the warmth in your cheeks. His lips were plumper, catching traces of your coral lipstick smudged there down to his jaw. He slotted himself again between your legs, grazing a hand on your waist and the other to your warm cheek. “The door’s unlocked now, and it’s 5 am. Do you want to clean up now?”

You playfully scoffed, aware that neither of you had plans to do that yet. Such a player while in the heat of the moment.

“Spare me 15 more minutes with you first.”

Hiding the romance you’ve both built failed without trying. Aphrodite spotted all the signs from your open physical affection and words of admiration, calling you two out in front of everyone without shame. She is the goddess of love, after all. You couldn’t fool her even if you tried.

Plus, she’s the one who locked the two of you up in the Theater Room that night. But neither of you know that.

“Sketch my ideal home?” Jeno bent down to the table, testing out his newly bought pens so they wouldn’t spill.

“Isn’t that why you decided to pursue Architecture in the first place? Come on now!” You pestered across him, opening your new sketchpad since your last one ran out of pages. As expected, Jeno bought you one when he went to the bookstore. As much as you insisted not to because he should use the money somewhere else, he did it anyway. He loved your works, encouraging you in any way he could.

When he was reminded of his humble beginnings of his passion for architecture by you, never had he envisioned exactly how his perfect home would be like. Settling down was so far beyond his mind, only focusing to graduate university then study for the licensure exams. However, he did miss drawing something for fun, not as a requirement. He also was the one who took charge of designing his dorm.

“Fine, only if you draw what your ideal home would’ve been if you never left London.”

Now as lovers, the only addition to your relationship were the public and private exchanges of affection. Deep conversations, film viewing, back and forth banter, you’re both still the same competitive duo everyone expected to be together. In public, the two of you held hands, hugged, kissed each other cheeks too when it felt right. Cleopatra’s face of fake nausea was priceless every time, while Princess Diana, Anne, and Katherine enjoyed it. It’s been years since they’ve seen this glow of adoration in you. Bit by bit, you’re going back to the old you. Except now, you’re a lot stronger.

Perhaps, this version of you proved wrong for the need for romance. Even if you made the choice not to settle down then, it would’ve been different if Jeno was in your universe then.

“Are you done there?” Jeno asked while you were finishing up your masterpiece. Life in London sounded fun when you were younger, having all these ideas on interior design and the like. An innocent time.

Instead of replying, you strode to his side and compared your pieces together. He pictured a two-story home, with a backyard and rooftop area. He definitely wanted to stay in the city as his whole life was based there. Although you preferred living in the countryside more for more freedom, you gave it a shot by pinpointing every detail of a wealthy typical Victorian-era home you liked. You desired a spacious lobby with a grand staircase in the middle, a crystal chandelier there too. The living room would have a small library and a grand piano, where wide doors leading to the grasslands were beside it.

Considering you two lived from different times, in a way your ideal homes were similar. Somewhere private, surrounded by nature and minimal furniture, you’re curious as to how it would look if the two of you fused them together. A mix of old and new, will it look pretty?

“What will look pretty?” Jeno questioned your random thought, looking back and forth at your sketches. “You know who’s pretty though?”

“If you say what I think you’re going to say, I’m lea-”

“You.”

Jeno has gotten flirtier since that night, always finding the right opportunity to flatter you. Although you denied them out of embarrassment, the butterflies in your stomach can’t lie to you.

You’re so smitten, and so was he.

Jeno’s always one to follow the rules, but so far, he’s been breaking some of them already.

Just last night, he gave Renjun access to the lively museum because he needed more research regarding you. Initially, he practically interviewed Jeno for every piece of information he gathered because he used to be so deep in the books to study everything about you. Now in the past, Renjun still couldn’t forget how Jeno drunkenly admitted how crazy he was going to be over you and your coldness whilst sobering up in the dorm.

He didn’t understand one bit by that, especially when you’re technically dead. But by the sight of the first piece Renjun saw alive, which was Zeus, he almost passed out. Piece by piece, he viewed these artworks come to life from his fresh eyes. Right before he could’ve screamed when Athena shot a lightbulb in their exhibit, you happily called out Jeno’s name.

Renjun froze on the spot upon seeing your wax figure come to life. He’s browsed through this museum numerously due to the new exhibits, but lately, he checked your section out to find any tiny details that were linked to your life. Aside from the sketchpad, compass, and hairpins, he wanted to know if there was more to your life as an explorer.

As human interactions except the night guard weren’t allowed, Renjun needed help for his project in Women Studies. Just like Jeno’s assignment, you aided him. Fruitfully answering every question he gave you, Athena popped out of nowhere to inspect Jeno.

“I see you’re breaking another rule.”

“I’m sorry, Athena. He was desperate, and it would be selfish of me to let him fail.”

“This is the last one I’ll let slide, alright?” Athena huffed, not impressed by the reckless behavior Jeno acquired over time. She saw this coming, but for a change, she couldn’t punish him. He was a young adult, still learning more about life. Only will she step in if things turn for the worst. “I can’t believe I’ve gained a soft spot for you.”

Jeno laughed, hugging the figure like his older sister. “You love me though!”

Glad to say, Renjun aced his project and kept his word of not telling anyone about the happenings in Jeno’s job. Jeno even made a makeshift non-disclosure contract so Renjun wouldn’t spill the slightest details.

Lately, so much has been happening in the museum that having alone time with each other was rare. And when you did, the two of you made sure to maximize it and make every intimate moment count. From each touch, each longing kiss, each moan, and groan, never were you left hanging whether you’re at the Theater Room, Jeno’s office, or the Foreign Art Room.

The only time the two of you went beyond the boundaries was at the indoor garden. Jeno managed to get the key to it, lighting up some candles before you invited you inside. Thanks to the magic of the Greek gods, the cameras were bewitched to display fake imageries when security checks in the morning after.

Upon your deep conversations, you’ve mentioned once or twice about the indoor garden. It was the latest addition of the museum, opening in the early 2000s. Because it was a sacred place, no art piece was ever allowed inside.

Yet again, Jeno challenged the rules again when he invited you inside. A few minutes before, he set up some lights along the hallway of the garden, where he placed a blanket, a picnic basket, and his laptop right at the end of it. The best place to view everything, he just knew you’d love it.

He was undoubtedly right once you gasped at such a pretty sight. Seeing the silhouettes of various flowers and plants together with the night sky with all the stars sparkling, it was like you’re attending another ball with your sisters, who were looking for suitors then.

Once Jeno leisurely led you until the end, he brought out all the delicacies from the basket. One of them was this Italian savory dish of dough with toppings such as cheese and pepperoni, or pizza as they named it. The next ones were fresh strawberries and melted chocolate, followed by grape juice.

“I’d drink actual alcohol with you again, only if I didn’t get shitfaced and do my job properly.”

“Point taken. Besides, this is close enough. So pour me a drink please.”

Perhaps this was the closest to a date Jeno could ever ask you out to. With the restrictions and being constrained with time, he brainstormed all sorts of ways to bring the outside world to you. From simply letting you wander around this fascinating room, he unleashed the inner romantic in him. None of his friends would’ve thought since they never asked him about it, so he kept it to himself only. Finally, he’s satisfied with what he prepared. After eating, the two of you would watch more films before the sun rose again.

You’re just the right person for him at the moment he can act that way.

After your quiet stroll and sitting back down, Jeno surprisingly handed you a tiny box.

“A gift?”

“Open it.” He sipped on his juice, paying attention to your actions. Gently untying the box, the amazement in your eyes couldn’t fathom such a lovely present. No words were required to verify that Jeno outdid himself again, just your facial expression alone is enough.

When Jeno said that he pays attention to the tiny details, he doesn’t bluff. Throughout your growing relationship, you’ve cited how you wanted another special flower in your life. Just because you couldn’t view lavender roses the same way ever again, it didn’t mean you wanted to kick them out of your life. Flowers were one of nature’s beautiful creations, so you’re wishing to find the love you once had for lavender roses in other ones.

Thus, you came across what you thought held the highest form of meaning: red roses. Despite its thorns, it’s still a marvelous flower. Innocently, you told him that just because of the memory of your father giving them to your mother on her birthday yearly.

Red roses represented true love and romance, a discreet message only those eager would know.

Jeno was one of them, which was why he reserved this gift for this very moment. It was a necklace he found through a college fair recently, a subtle red rose pendant in the center. Since he couldn’t give you huge gifts, he settled for something light. Something none of the guards or the director wouldn’t pinpoint out when they do their inspections.

“Do you like it?”

Not one utter from your mouth since you’re so hypnotized, your lips quirked up in a charming smile. “Is that even a question? This is astonishing, Jeno.”

After you attempted to put it around your neck, Jeno sighed and stepped in to help you out. “Turn around, (Y/N). Let me.”

The tension gradually heightened once you held your hair up so Jeno accessibly viewed your clean neck. Clasping the lock, it took all his might to hold himself back from you. Even from behind, your silhouette was attractive to him. The lights he set up weren’t helping the slightest of what he’s thinking to do with you.

“Done.” He breathily whispered in your ear.

If he thought he was the only one feeling something powerful, he’d be more than wrong. The lingering sensation of his slim fingers gracing your décolletage area unhinged another kind of want, the one you’ve only imagined in your mind when you were needy and alone. It shouldn’t be a sin unless you’re with the person you’ve fallen for, right?

Facing him again, the eye contact didn’t last long when you were the first one to strike a move. Jeno kissed back right away, his hands pulling you closer by your waist. Whatever sultry music Jeno played, it gave you the perfect momentum to grind on his lap. He groaned against kisses, adding his tongue. His thumbs sensually rubbed your hipbones, one of your hands toying around with his hair while the other one balled up his shirt by the chest. None of you cared if anyone caught you.

The last time you’ve been this aggressive was at the Theater Room, which eventually increased the hidden lust you’ve had towards each other. Taking things slowly at first, it’s about time to delve in for more. The mood was already set from the start, even if Jeno didn’t plan this to happen here. But being the prepared man he is, he did have a condom in his back pocket.

Your fingers trailed from his neck until his crotch. He was hard, sensing how suffocated he must be. But he kept himself in control. Locking eye contact, you sweetly spoke.

“Grant my second wish, Jeno.” That same hand of yours held one of his, planting it in your breast. “Make love to me.”

Giving the go-signal, he crashed his lips on yours while stripping you off your dress. Carefully, he turned you around to untie your tight corset. Once it fell, your neck leaned sideways as his lips attacked it madly. Your breaths were tremulous, placing both his hands on your freed breasts to knead with. His touch felt like fire on your skin, yet you couldn’t stop.

“Jeno,” Obscene moans from your lips choked out. You desired more, shifting back to face him again to attack his lips. Slowly feeling one of his hands laying you down, you spread your legs with ease just for him. He parted after your head landed on the cushion to unbutton himself. The way your mouth dropped to selfishly stare at his bare body, flexing them before getting back into position. He was fit and toned just as Cleopatra predicted.

As much as Jeno knew how wild your thoughts were getting, he was more taken aback by your perky chest.

“Fuck, you are divine.” He sucked one nipple as his fingers ventured to slip your panties down. So much was going on, you didn’t know which stimulated you more. You tried to close your legs around his hand, but he slapped your inner thigh to stop you.

The cool breeze shivered you, especially from your core. Jeno’s fingers adventurously grazed from your hip area to your lower lips. He teasingly rubbed it up and down in your essence, his index finger settling it right at your needy clit. Another moan escaped your lips, an opportunity for Jeno to slide his tongue in your mouth. Enjoying the moment, his fingers dipped inside you. A gasp broke your kiss, making him giggle in your ear.

He knew exactly what he was doing.

“Oh, angel. The things I want to do with you.”

Sliding them back and forth, curling it even, you squirmed for more. Dropping himself to meet your core, Jeno placed your legs on his shoulder. Pushing you closer, his steamy breath felt like friction. Your hips grinded against it, so he gripped on them so you stay put.

“Angel,” He chuckled darkly, his crotch tightening at how powerless you looked. “You’re so pretty.”

You were drenched from arousal. But to Jeno, you were glowing under the lights. He wanted to take his time to admire what he had done to you. His independent girl, only weak for him.

His fingers unfolded in your lower lips, diving in to your orbit. You could hardly speak from his skilled mouth, especially his tongue savagely lapping your clit in numerous paces. You’ve only daydreamed about what it could do aside from kissing, and it exceeded your expectations. By the heated sensation that had the heels of your feet digging his back deeply, you affirmed to have seen more stars than the night sky above you.

Your back arched uncontrollably while his hands grasped your hips to stay in place, the tears in your eyes formulating while tugging on his hair. Your thighs clenched around his face, but his broad shoulders widened it to taste more of you. No use of pulling away when his grip on you was tight, so you could only cry out from the pleasure.

“Fuck!”

The ringing sounds in your off were going off, your throat drying up from moaning once another orgasm was about to hit. Once the knot in you snapped, nothing could hold back your screams of pleasure whilst panting for air. Sensitive as he licked every remaining essence he caused, he smirked as he got up to unbuckle his jeans.

Oh, boy. He got quite a package behind his boxers.

Even while you were overly sensitive, you had to grasp it in your hands. He was yours, and you were his.

The way you clenched around his protected length, pausing to readjust yourself to the feeling. The foreplay deemed helpful, though the girth of him overwhelmed you. He stretched you out so good.

“Are you okay, (Y/N)?” The stunned face you made was expected, still feeling worried that it may be too much.

Biting your lip, you moaned once everything felt bearable. “You can move, Jeno.”

None of you could track exactly how many rounds you went through. Even in the semi-public area, it didn’t hinder either of you. There’s that thrill, and surprisingly enough, you both shared the liking of it. Always switching the positions, you decided to call it quits after another sloppy round in missionary. Something seeing Jeno on top, fully submitting yourself to him, made you feel calm to be vulnerable. It’s really the trust you’ve established from the start, making you rely on humans again once you’ve let the past be.

Jeno brought out another blanket, initially meant for cuddling. It was still applicable though, curling your body into a spoon towards his racing chest. Music was no longer noise, the intimacy creeping back instead of lust this time. The afterglow of Jeno, sweaty and knackered as his legs sprawled under the sheet, was a sight for sore eyes. He’s always been handsome while on duty, but post-sex gave him an extra boost.

Plus there’s pride from the red marks courtesy of you on his chest, grazing over it softly.

Jeno chuckled softly at your smooth fingers, lifting them up to kiss them tenderly before kissing your lips again. Only humans were capable of and to love, but you’re some kind of an exception. Regardless of the magic from the plate, you’d be able to love too if it weren’t for your background.

There’s so much love Jeno wanted to offer you, even if he hasn’t said it out loud yet.

Perhaps one reason was because time was beginning to tick. Finals were a few weeks away, then the one-month long semestral break until a new semester kicks off. Time really flew by, and his bank account and heart expanded too. Enjoying the now was all he could think of doing, but those uncertainties bothered him.

The biggest would be where you and he would stand when his job ended.

Jeno was too absorbed in his internal debate, as portrayed by his eyes staring off in space and running his hand in his hair repeatedly. Something was disturbing him, and you’re concerned as to what it was.

“Jeno,” Around his arm, you tapped his chest to get him out of it. “What’s going on in your head?”

Jeno approached every obstacle he faces straightforwardly, not wanting to let him hold back. Rarely did he keep secrets, especially from you. Instead of hiding away, he voiced it out.

“(Y/N), will we work out?”

“What do you mean, Jeno?”

You’re so occupied in the present that thinking of the future was never in your field. Like him, you’re just enjoying being in the moment. Though after tonight, it’s making you wonder if there’s a future.

“Well,” He placed his hand on top of yours, affectionately observing you. “Times flies faster when you’re having fun, and well, the semester is ending.”

His last words crushed a part of your heart, remembering his initial plan. None of you expected your friendship to bloom into what it is now, but life was just full of surprises without a schedule. At the same time, none of you wouldn’t have it any other way.

It may have been a few months since you two committed to each other, but the spark was still strong. It wasn’t like a summer romance kind of feeling. Time was not a determinant of love either, which you were certain of it with Jeno. A lot more than Junmyeon.

It should’ve frightened you when you realized your love for Jeno, but it didn’t. Even if you didn’t age physically, your mindset did. You’ve learned to forgive your younger self, and through Jeno, you let your guard down completely. From that, you let love in. Platonic to your fellow art pieces, and all of the above to Jeno.

Throughout your relationship, you regained all confidence in yourself and everything you set your mind to.

“I wouldn’t want to worry too much about it if I were you.” Your body flipped to lie on your stomach, resting your head on your palm.

“Why shouldn’t I, angel?”

Gazing back at him, you left a velvety kiss on his lips to rest his thoughts. His hand wrapped your neck, deepening it. But you pulled away with a giggle, all too knowing of his secret intentions as his cock began to harden again. His eyes narrowed down and his lower lip stuck out at your attempt of being a tease.

But enough about sex, you wanted to address a point.

Lee Jeno was going to be the biggest risk you wanted to take and fight for, and no one should try to stop you.

“I’ll ask Circe for a potion. For me, for you, for us.”

If it weren’t for insistent questioning towards every art piece, who kept their mouths shut, only Circe herself banished him from his suffering. Her series of potions varied, and the one you requested years ago which you threw out was capable of turning any art piece into a living human. No potion of Circe ever failed, so you entrusted your life for the day you do drink it.

“Are you sure, angel?”

Jeno knew about that one specifically, and as great to hear that you never threw it out, he never put pressure on you. He wanted you to do whatever felt right, even if deep down, he wished you’d use it. He was only worried about how the flow of the entire museum would be disrupted.

Typical Jeno always looking out for you, but you saw right through his concern. Here you were, caressing his check as reassurance. With an honest smile,

“I’ve never been more certain with anything in my life here until you came, Lee Jeno.”

Jeno opened up more to his life outside the museum, telling all sorts of experiences not just his days as a university student. From his childhood, his family, his travels, heck you even want to meet his friends at this point!

Newly, he shared with you how the sunrise and sunset looked like in Seoul with much vivacity. It’s a luxury as a human to witness as day breaks and ends, so you could imagine by yourself how it would look like. Sure, you had drawings and all, but that was from the real (Y/N) (Y/L/N).

This version of you wanted to live more; that’s your greed now.

“You’ve never touched snow too, right?” Jeno, who had his arm wrapped around you, silently watched the first batch of snow from inside.

“Yup, that’s the thing when you’re imprisoned in this place.” You sulked by his side, earning a chuckle from him who pulled you in closer.

“Don’t tell me now that you despise this place.”

“I don’t, but it hinders me to experience new things. The whole pattern of being awake at night by a plate gets tiring, Jeno.”

All Jeno would do when you’re frustrated was placing your head on his shoulder, listening as you talk.

“I know, angel. But it won’t be long until you leave this place with me, right?”

“You know it!” You interlocked your hands with him, eyes trained at every falling snowflake.

Sometimes, moments in silence with Jeno were all you needed for the night. Being within each other’s presence, focusing or admiring something from afar, it was all the peace you’ve needed from the bustling art pieces.

This week was the last of the semester, and Jeno’s off duty for tonight to focus on his exams. You’ll see him tomorrow night, which was his last shift ever, and also yours too.

Perhaps the biggest milestone you’re committing to without any regrets.

However, it took an unnecessary conversation you accidentally eavesdropped on to rock your decision.

You needed more ink after running out mid-way of sketching the sculptures as a secret parting gift. Before you could take a single step inside your exhibit room, a series of voices were full-on arguing. Booming back and forth, you peeped your ear out whilst hiding against the door.

“Athena, how dare you did to her?! She’s done so well from moving on from it, falling in love even! And now you’re telling me this?!” The distinct voice of Princess Diana, who spoke sweetly most of the time, boomed towards the Greek god. “You’re heartless.”

“I did what I had to do for the sake of this place, Diana!” Athena raised her voice, the lightning in her hands holding back from lashing out. She hated it when anyone argued with her, especially when she does things according to what she believed was necessary. Out of everyone, she had more leadership. “She had to know that her place is here as a wax figure, not outside. Talking Junmyeon out of it was for the best, plus it’s ideal when he drank the potion of memory loss from Circe.”

“But it tore her apart when he left her, and it’s going to tear her again if you do the same with Jeno.”

“How else are you going to approach the situation then, Diana? Those two have broken the highest golden rule, so they need to wake up.”

Right when she celebrated within herself for healing, hearing the unbearable revelation behind the past devastated you. This whole time, she internally blamed herself for being ageless and lashed out at others. The scary past barged back in, and you couldn’t handle it anymore.

Somewhere in the corner, you wept without a trace. You could care less about Athena’s opinions, but you found yourself agreeing to some of her words. You had a role to fulfill, and leaving that behind would be selfish and it could make the museum go topsy-turvy. As painful for Junmyeon to leave you, it was because the truth hurts. Nothing could change it, even if Circe could be your solution because it’ll leave a lot of questions. You didn’t want Jeno to be seen as a suspect.

Oh, Jeno.

There’s nothing wrong with falling in love either, you didn’t intend it to happen. But it becomes unfair when it compromises with your purpose, and that’s not how you are. You’ll always remember Jeno as your biggest risk, though it’s time to end things. Treacherous as it was to accept for you, risk-takers have boundaries too.

Fast forward, on the night of Jeno’s last shift, you’ve cherished every second with him. Playing around, chatting with other art pieces, kissing in private, you made it count. Before dawn broke, that’s where you chose to come clean by the garden, your sacred place. Not even your self-reassurance could prepare you to witness the hurt and confusion Jeno felt.

“You’re a mortal, and you still get to choose your path. Mine is already predetermined here as a wax copy of a historical figure.” You advised as you held both his hands, your voice shaking at the reality.

A few days ago, you were beaming with exhilaration at a new journey but now you’ve permanently backed out. Jeno couldn’t comprehend, and as much as he tried, he couldn’t. A life without you by his side would be empty and dull. “Even so, there are things about you that the original person didn’t have.”

Arguing with him wasn’t your favorite, and it’ll leave the two of you in a bad mood. But there is no way to negotiate this; you’ve already made up your mind. “We must end this, Jeno. You need someone who can grow old with you, and I can’t be that person for you.”

“But we can make it work!” His hands gripped on your slumped shoulders, whilst your face avoiding his to spare yourself from the heartache. “There’s still Circe.”

“I know, but recently, I found out that she’s an indirect cause of my misery.” Pulling away from his touch, you belted with frustration. “I cannot do this anymore, Jeno.”

You’ve always fought for whatever you wanted in life, and Jeno knew he was one of them if it weren’t for you telling him that. So he did the same, thinking of ways to make you feel whole. Now, he couldn’t tolerate the sudden crumbling of his heart from your outburst, and all he wanted to know was why you felt this way. How could he help you?

You don’t keep secrets from Jeno, but the truth behind your harsh actions cannot be revealed for the sake of the museum. Plus, you didn’t want him to despise this place he admired. Causing him pain wasn’t on your list, but keeping him safe was. It may be shown differently and he may not understand it now, but over time, he will.

“Jeno, you’ll find someone better out there. Someone with their whole life ahead of them, who’ll love you for everything that makes you who you are.” Repetitive punches in your guts urged you to barf at your half-lie, but you held it in.

“Why are you pushing me away? What happened to taking risks, (Y/N)?” Jeno interrogated, taking your hands in his hands again. They unconventionally quivered, like his lips. Jeno has never cried in front of anyone, not even when he was younger. Though for you, he just might. “Am I not worth it for you?”

Dear heavens, he was wrong. You internally screamed that, but you can’t let your selfishness seize the night. As Athena said, you had to wake up from your dream. “Committing to you was my biggest risk of them all, Jeno. Everything else that went along with it, I don’t regret it one bit. But time’s really up for us, and we must resume our normal duties.”

“I can’t lose you, (Y/N).”

“You never will, Jeno.”

He crouched lower to meet your height, his finger moving your head so you’d look at him back. Weakly enough, you did. “I want you to be a part of my normal life, angel.”

“I’ll always be here, you know. I’ll be standing in my usual spot upstairs, and you can drop by whenever you can.” You pressed your lips, lifting your head to avoid incoming tears. Meanwhile, he began shedding a few. You’ve hurt him big time, and you’ll never forgive yourself for this. “I still have one wish, right?”

Jeno’s sorrow was beyond his capacity, leaning his forehead against yours to kiss it. No matter what he could say or do, he already knew it won’t be effective. You’re affirmative in your choices, yet he still wanted to challenge it. All he wanted to know was why you’re doing this.

“Let me walk you one last time to your section.”

The black night sky had remnants of blue, motioning that dawn was approaching. Other figures gave their goodbyes to Jeno earlier, cleaning up their areas before they pose. Though none of them anticipated such a cold atmosphere between you two, they could only spy on what was bound to happen.

“My last wish is for you to let me go, Jeno.” You avowed, blinking your eyes with faux positivity. Your hands patted his blazer so it wouldn’t crease. “I already have a role to fulfill here, and you’re on the way to yours, future architect.”

“I love you, (Y/N) (Y/L/N).” Only tonight did he muster his courage to finally admit it to you after giving himself more time to analyze it. Timing was always crucial, and the badness of it showed.

Deep in your heart, you resonated the feeling. But it’ll make things more complicated, and it was the final thing you’ve wanted to occur. Someone had to be the strong one, and now, it should be you. With one more compassionate kiss on his lips, you stepped inside your section and readied your position.

“Goodbye, Lee Jeno.”

The sunshine brightened the room, and you’ve frozen to slumber again.

All Jeno could do was drop on his knees, sobbing over your rash actions. Unknown to him, a single tear left your eye as you posed.

Regardless of what status you were in, the pain of it all remained.

Jeno spent most of his semestral break with his friends to travel or whatnot, trying to forget it all. Even if he aced all his finals, his efforts felt like nothing if he never had you by his side to celebrate.

The sting over his short-lived romance with you never diminished the slightest, no one whom he could express his pain about it to especially when Renjun drank the memory wipe potion that Athena initially left for Jeno by his desk.

Forget it all, and live a peaceful life. You have so much potential, my mentee.

- Athena

Perhaps this was the same thing Junmyeon drank all those years ago, but unlike him, he didn’t have the guts to. He still wanted another chance.

So every day since the new semester began, he spent every afternoon break at your section. He’ll be seated by the bench, doing his assignments and talking about his day while sometimes stealing a glance of your figure. Some habits don’t change.

He never got sick of the same smile you exemplified, falling even more for you. He’ll often wonder what you’ve been up to.

What are your new sketches?

Are you taking care of Mochi well?

Have you apologized to Sanghoon yet?

Speaking of him, he surprisingly scooted over to Jeno’s side. This was the first time Jeno met the man, and politely enough greeted him. Sanghoon interviewed the boy, asking all sorts of questions that Jeno had every answer to. The biggest change that Sanghoon noticed since he left was your personality. You no longer bite, but treat everyone kindly without bias. You’re always active to help him out in cleaning the lobby, and you don’t go easily defensive.

Once he found out that Jeno was the reason for that, he was overjoyed at the start and wanted to meet him some way. You were a tough cookie, but now you relaxed. That was all that mattered to him, hoping to know more about him from you. That was until Diana stepped in and told him everything that happened. Mostly, the bad.

Playfulness eventually bore love. The last time you fell in love was in the 80s and Junmyeon pushed you away, he recalled. This time, you’re pushing Jeno away because you simply agreed with Athena’s points.

This wasn’t right, but it wasn’t his place to interfere.

But then again, he finally caught Jeno for the first time today and this time, he was open to hearing his side of the story. Lessen his misery too.

“No matter how stubborn she is, she loves you.” He advised him, bringing out one of your full sketchbooks. As Jeno opened it, the majority of the portraits were him. Sleeping, smiling, laughing, you drew him from every minor detail you could spot like the mole near his eye and his crescent eyes.

A handsome face I would never get sick until the end of time. Someone I want to wake up to every day in the morning if it weren’t for that plate.

- (Y/N)

Towards the end, a sketch of a house unfolded. The interior was a fusion of modernity and old royal design due to its white walls, wide space, and the placing of less furniture, plus an open backyard. There’s another tiny comment on the side from you.

I was right. Joining our varying designs together is pretty. Maybe Jeno and I could live in a house like this one day.

- (Y/N)

If you loved him so much, why did you let him go then when you had all these plans with him? Even if he tried to understand, he just didn’t.

“Don’t give up just yet when she told you to.”

“Are you just saying this or something?”

“Well, Princess Diana passed this message on but after everything, I believe that she’s right.” Sanghoon gave his opinion, but Jeno was reluctant to accept it.

“I never got a proper explanation why she suddenly changed her mind, Sanghoon.” He ranted, raking his hand through his hair from puzzlement. “Did I do something wrong?”

Sanghoon pitied him, having the upper hand and questioning himself whether to reveal the truth. However, since this boy took the job, he’s succumbed to secrecy. Without any transparency, it could drive someone mad. He’s too young for that, so Sanghoon breathed in defeat and placed his hand on Jeno’s shoulder.

“Promise me you won’t be mad when I tell you because I was when I found out; almost screamed even.”

Jeno nodded, listening to whatever Sanghoon had to say.

Of all people, he never would’ve expected Athena to do such a brash thing. Someone he respected and trusted, only to betray him by doing something she believed was good for all. Except it wasn’t, and it ended up hurting you all these years. The woman he loved, now he’s a clearer understanding of why you did what you did. Yet, it can’t fix his excruciation.

Heartbroken was an understatement; he had no one to rely on. With Sanghoon, he finally had a proper breakdown. The older man could only comfort his quietly, picturing him like one of his sons going through a hard time in school. But if it involves the heart, it’ll take more time to recover.

“You’re always the one adjusting, Jeno. But I think this time, you’re the one who needs space.”

A Year and a Half Later

“Jeno Lee!!!” Jaemin roughly wallowed his best friend in a hug when he arrived in their dorm room for the first time in a long time. “You dyed your hair blonde again!”

Renjun, who was behind the two of them, only rolled his eyes as he helped carry Jeno’s bags. “God damn it, Jaemin! You’re supposed to be helping me first!”

“I know, but give me a few seconds! I’m just happy our group is back together!”

Jeno laughed at his friends’ annoying yet silly dynamics, giddy to be back home. For a year, Jeno spent his 3rd year of university in Rome, Italy after one of his professors brought up to him about a scholarship program there for his course. At the time where he needed a change of scenery, he sent his application form and got interviewed.

Acing it, he had the opportunity to fly across the world to study and travel. His English skills surely improved, even picking up Italian words along the way due to a required class for it. He studied the history of different locations and how they were built.

He also went on field trips almost every day if it weren’t for the Italian students assigned to tour him around, academic and non-academic. Nights he spent on drinking wine on the rooftop of his dorm with them, screaming his complaints in the world with them.

It didn’t hit him that his stay was reaching its end until he submitted his final plate. His goodbye party didn’t even feel like one, but a see you later in the next few years after he becomes a licensed architect with money. His goal of it felt more realistic, motivating him to excel in his remaining years in university.

After unpacking half of his things, he was reminded of an email from one of the head professors, who requested another copy of his confidential documents from the Italian university he went to as soon as he’s back on campus.

He raced to the department with a folder of them and luckily encountered the said professor. Handing it to him, this professor questioned how he was and what experiences he gained from the trip. With excitement, Jeno spoke all sorts of tales from his adventures, highlighting how determined he was now to be an architect.

“That’s great to hear, Jeno!” He celebrated, checking on his watch, and widened his eyes. Frantic at his colliding schedules, he asked Jeno for a favor. It turned out that at the same time as his emergency meeting, he’s supposed to tour the new transferee student around campus.

“Only if you have time, Jeno! I could always ask another student, plus you just came back and need rest.”

“It’s not like I left for a decade, sir. No worries, I’ll do it.”

“Oh, bless your soul.” He put his hands together in prayer position, bowing back and forth with gratitude. “Wait, she’s right outside! Go ahead and introduce yourself.”

Jeno nodded, exiting right through the department doors. This girl had her back turned, inspecting her surroundings. She wore a black and white tweed blazer that matched with her skirt, black high heeled boots, and a black handbag. She must be a foreigner, Jeno thought.

“Excuse me, are you the transferee in the department of Architecture?”

Jeno didn’t brace himself for the surprise he’d face once this girl reacted to him calling her out. Her face was one he could never forget, no matter how many times he told himself to. The same face he convinced his heart to stop beating for, yet it lied.

This radiant face was none other than yours.

Jeno almost dropped his phone. He tried his best to hold on to your promise, but he failed. It was the main reason he studied abroad; to forget and focus on his career path. So the least thing he could’ve done was to study hard for his dream career.

Just a glimpse of you projected back every single memory you’ve had together. Beautiful yet heart-wrenching, he kept his emotions to himself.

You even wore the rose necklace he got you. Could it be?

“It’s been a while, Lee Jeno.” You took the metaphorical scissors to cut the tension, trying to contain the crushing feelings. The faculty center was a public place, yet it’s like the two of you were on the main stage.

“Do you remember me?” Astounded, you nodded. Every single detail.

Jeno could’ve ran away, but didn’t. He could’ve left you hanging, but didn’t. He can no longer count how many times you’ve appeared in his dreams, only to be disappointed when morning comes to not have you in his arms. He took one step closer, taking his time.

“How do you know me?”

“You’re the boy whom I helped with his assignment, argued with me over Romeo and Juliet,” You mimicked his move, making you one step nearer to him. “And most of all, the boy I once gave my entire heart to.”

Another step, leaving a few inches between the two of you. His heart palpitated without caffeine. What if he was napping in his dorm again? It was all surreal. “Is it really you, (Y/N)?”

Hearing your name from his lips lowered your guard, you pleased him with a hopeful grin. “I’d be dust by now if I didn’t drink Circe’s potion, right?”

That’s where Jeno unchained himself from his emotions. He engulfed in a warm hug, one that has no plans to let go when his chin planted on your shoulder. You returned the gesture, dropping all your worries away along with your bag and papers as your arms snaked through his neck.

You knew you had to part ways for a while after everything, though you were unsure how he’d feel about it. You recalled every time he visited you after his job ended up until his intense chat with Sanghoon, where he bawled his heart out. You couldn’t take it anymore after trying to stay strong, crying as soon as you woke up that night.

All your fellow figures could do was soothe you down like before to the best of their abilities, yet this time, it was unsuccessful. You’re filled with misery, realizing later how much of a big mistake you’ve made.

You’ve isolated yourself again for a while, but less rudeness and more silence. It was until Circe visited you. She doesn’t like getting involved with drama, though now was different. She, alongside Hera and Aphrodite, couldn’t withstand you tolerating the heartbreak again. So they went behind Athena’s back on this one time and created a potion together just for you. But with a compromise.

“This potion can turn you into a human. However, there’s only a 10% chance you’ll regain all your memories from this place.”

“So I’ll forget everyone and him?”

“Yes, unfortunately.” You’re about to shoo her away, not in the mood to do something drastic as that. But Circe grabbed your arm again. “I strongly believe that if you and he meant to be, then there will come a time these past memories will suddenly surge at you.”

“Must I need to forget to live properly?”

You’re stubborn, and Circe expected it. “You’ve broken so many golden rules, (Y/N), so it must be done. I’ve gone against Athena for this potion, and rarely have I done that. So rather than wallowing up in misery, you should focus on yourself. Do what makes you happy because this place is trapping you from every great thing out there.”

Those were the word that the actual (Y/N) (Y/L/N) lived by, nevertheless, you’re unique from her. You built a separate identity from her. “But Jeno-”

“At the right time, (Y/N). Pull yourself together and do all the things you’ve dreamt of before he came into the picture. I just know he loves you that much, and that he will wait for you.”

That same night, you gathered all your senses and drank it. The transition was fast as lightning speed, and behold, you were like a new person. You’re back in London, with a family that closely resembled your former one; only 3 older siblings, making you the youngest. You also had a new set of memories, from childhood until your adult years.

From (Y/N) (Y/L/N), you became (Y/N) Edwards.

It took one drunken night out with your university friends for the unlikely surge of old memories to speedily hit through your intoxicated state. Way beyond a dream, you’ve dropped your shot glass and broke down in the bathroom of your dorm room. You left something unaccomplished, and you had to do something before it’s too late.

Thus, you rushed to Seoul thanks to your parents’ support as they agreed that exploring outside your home country was a great experience. The only excuse you gave to your friends for the sudden transfer was you finding a new calling.

Sure, studying abroad was an exciting thing but you’re more determined to reunite with him. Even if this encounter was unforeseen, it was bound to happen one day. It so turned out that you had the same major in your former university and this new one.

Head to toe, you remembered everything.

“I’m so sorry I took so long.” You cradled your head on his chest, unaware of how your new life left Jeno so troubled.

“That doesn’t matter anymore.” Jeno tightened his grip, scared of releasing you again. Those two years felt like a breath of fresh air and a punch in the gut. “I tried to live up to your last wish, but I really can’t.”

“I want to take that wish back, Jeno. I wasn’t thinking right and only ended putting you through so much.”

“Oh, angel. I slowly understood why you did it.” Before he got too fragile, he softened his grip on you and showed his face again to you. He wanted a better look at his pretty girl, his fingers brushing strands of your hair behind your ear. Heart-fluttering, you bit your bottom lip. “What would you want to wish for instead?”

“Instead of you letting me go, I wish you could take me back and love me again. I can’t undo the past, but I’d still like to think I’ve tried my best.” That was the only wish you could ever think of. As huge as it was, it was something he may not accept. Yet you gave it a go, risking it all. “I don’t deserve you at all, Jeno.”

“Don’t say that, (Y/N).” One of his hands grabbed yours, putting it on his cheek. Cupping it, “I’ve never stopped loving you, you know.”

Oh, love. An all-too familiar emotion that either makes or breaks you. Of all the times you could’ve said those words, you held back, especially that wretched night you two broke it off. Although you showed it, being able to say it to someone felt more empowering.

This was finally the chance you’ve unconsciously waited for.

“I’m stupid for not saying this sooner.”

“What is it?”

With intimate eye contact, you drowned in the comfort of his brown orbs. You trusted him then, and you trusted him now. “I love you, Lee Jeno.”

Secretly, Jeno anticipated for the day you’d say those meaningful 3 words. Just like you, he showed more affection through actions than words. He only admitted when he lost you, and never would he do the same mistake again. If he felt that the love was strongly present, he will say it aloud.

“I love you still, (Y/N).” His arm around your waist tugged you in further. “I loved you as (Y/N) (Y/L/N) and I will continue to love you as (Y/N) Edwards.”

He peeked on your ID earlier, but regardless, he stood by his truth. You’re still the same (Y/N).

Finally, he closed the limited space between your lips. The memories of your past romance replayed in sync of every touching kiss, popping one leg up like in the movies. The Princess Diaries, specifically. Like in the museum from your unbearable parting, one warm tear freed itself down your cheek.

The sweetness of being reunited with you again beat the torturous wait of Jeno. Time really made your hearts grow fonder. As everyone said, if the love between two people is real, then it’ll find its way back to each other.

The world must be on your side too because no professor called you two out on your public display of affection. Jeno pecked your lips one time before stepping away, picking up the things you dropped.

“Now come on, I have to tour you around as instructed.”

You stomped on your feet, rolling your eyes from being left hanging. He’s still the same tease from before. “After that kiss though, I would’ve thought we could reschedule it.”

“No can do, Edwards.” Passing over your things, he wrapped one arm around you as he escorted you out of the building. The university was huge, with more buildings and green fields surrounded everywhere. “Left or right? There are a lot of places you missed out on all those years.”

“Point taken. Then you lead the way, my love.”

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halaboyz · 3 years

Text

–– PHOTOGRAPH // CHANHEE.

pairing: photographer! chanhee x fem! reader genre: fluff, bffs to lovers word count: 2k warnings // notes: profanities, cliche, cheesy things and shitty effort of making lines ;; happiest birthday to our choi chanhee!! may he be blessed for his heart full of love <3

"You're coming to my exhibit, right?" He said as he hands you one of the tickets, and you chuckling because of the name of his exhibit.

"What kind of name is this?" You stifled a laugh, "My Art Speaks Words I Want to Deliver to You,"

Chanhee watches you hold on to dear life as you burst out laughing, wiping the tears that have escaped your eyes.

"Well, if only the linguistic major here helped me pick out some words I don't even know exists," He glares at you, "Then maybe we could've picked a better name, am I right?" He rolls his eyes as you calmed down, finally taking a seat beside him on the couch.

“Okay, okay Mr. grumpy, I’m sorry,” You said between laughter. Looking at the time and date, you nod, your smile slowly fading to a frown.

“What’s wrong? You can’t come again?” He frowns with you, a pout coming out of his lips. Your heart broke by the sight, knowing that even if he had hundreds of exhibits already, you haven’t come to one because of work.

“I’m afraid I’m gonna have to miss this one too,” You tackled him into a hug. “I have a very important meeting set by last minute,” You mumbled against the crook of his neck, causing him to whine.

“I was so sure you’d go to this one though..” You hear him mumble, as a sigh came out.

“How are you so sure?” You raised your eyebrows at him, sitting up.

“I checked your schedule!” He exclaimed, getting the ticket from you. “I can’t help it. You always have work when I handle an exhibit and wow, are you still my best friend?” He dramatically stands up, making his way to the other couch in front of you.

“Aw,” You whined, tailing him and throwing yourself at him again making him groan. “Give me that,” You reach for the ticket, only to be pulled by Chanhee again.

“Can’t you just cancel it?” He pouts, looking desperate.

“Look, I’m not the client. I can’t just cancel whenever,” You pressed his cheeks together, wiggling his face. “But give me the ticket. If they can set meetings last minute, they might cancel things last minute too. We’ll never know,” You reached higher, grabbing the ticket.

Chanhee huffed, making you lose your footing and it all happened so fast, you instinctively put out your elbow to support your fall– well, on the floor. You didn’t know Chanhee had that goddamn fast reflexes as he pulls you close to him, making you elbow his.. danger zone.

You shrieked as chanhee silently suffers, his face saying it all.

“Oh my fucking god..” You muttered, pressing your lips to a thin line to stop yourself from bursting in laughter.

Chanhee lets out a small groan as you slowly remove your elbows, your face mirroring Chanhee’s pained face.

“I’m so sorry,” You mumble, letting out a small laugh.

“I’d kill you if you laugh right in front of me,” He sighs out, crouching and wriggled his body all over the couch.

You were red. Oh, no. Not because of what just happened, but because you were stopping yourself from laughing. You knew Chanhee meant every word he said.

“You should fucking go at my exhibit after busting my balls,” He mumbled against the throw pillow.

“Hey! Not my fault you pulled me!”

You were redder. Oh, no. Not because you were now suppressing your laughter, but how you remembered how close Chanhee was to you just minutes ago if it weren’t for his unfortunate luck.

He suddenly stands up, wincing.

“Are you kidding me?! If it weren’t for me, you’re injured and crying and we’re probably on the way to the hospital right now!” He sighs out, the pain finally fading second by second.

You fanned yourself, trying to focus on what your friend was saying.

“Anyways,” You shake your head. “I’ll do my best.” You smile at him apologetically before sticking out your tongue, and ending the night while getting tackled by Chanhee– as if he was possessed by Changmin.

You bounced your feet continuously, waiting for your client. You just prayed for it to be really, really short to get to Chanhee’s exhibition.

You knew how important this was to him, and it broke your heart that as his best friend, you can’t even go to one.

Or was it because you’re starting to see Chanhee in a whole, different light?

There are a few times that your heart thumped abnormally at the sight of Chanhee frowning, and you can’t put your finger on which emotion was it. Did it hurt you because you were his best friend and you can’t go, or did it hurt because you were still a best friend? Either way, if it were the latter, if you were his girlfriend– no, you didn’t deserve him.

You can’t even make time for him as a best friend, how’d you do if you were his?

Starting to overthink, you were thankful by the sound of your phone rang for a second, signaling a message.

chanhee: go or this friendship is over. grr sent 3:35pm

You knew he was joking. Partly, you guess. Or maybe not. You suddenly became nervous, your feet bouncing doubled. You sip on the drink, you had twenty-five minutes left to run over his exhibit, but the client–

You jump as your phone suddenly rang, making you tremble. Your client was finally calling, after being late for fifteen minutes already.

And oh my god, your heart could have burst from the news. You hailed a taxi as fast as you can, and the smile on your face can’t stop rising.

Finally. You were finally getting to see his exhibit.

You smile more at the thought, more to expect of Chanhee’s reaction. You felt nervous, excited, and giddy. It wasn’t the first time seeing Chanhee’s works, as he’d been part of the photography club since college, but it still made you excited and proud of what he’s become.

You sighed in relief as you look outside, the big name– My Art Speaks Words I Want to Deliver to You welcoming you.

3:50.

Ten minutes. You just need to run, no biggie.

“Hi, I’m uh.. Chanhee’s friend.” You smile at the guard, handing him your ticket while still trying to catch your breath.

“Oh! You’re! You’re! You’re the friend!” He exclaimed, excitedly opening the door for you. “You’re just in time! Well, technically, you’re.. running a bit late but! Doesn’t matter. You’re finally here!” You just look at him confusingly, nodding your head as you roam your eyes on the big place.

Your heartbeat is twice as fast more than running.

You felt combusting quite literally. Your eyes wandered to each picture, letting it sink in that those in the pictures..

Were you.

It was all you.

There were only a few people left, smiling as they take in every photograph that wasn’t even them.

“These are so sweet. The name of the exhibit literally says it all,” A woman in her middle 30s, you guess, said as she clung to her probably husband’s arm.

“It does. The photographer’s indeed talented. Even makes me giddy,” You chuckle as you eavesdropped, reverting your attention back to the pictures.

All was black and white.

But it didn’t matter.

What colored his world was you– it has always been you.

A black and white picture doesn’t do justice to how much light you bring to his dull world, it was just you that he needed in order to make a simple black and white picture to be beautiful.

Your smile. It was one of the things he loved seeing, he loved taking a picture of. It made everyone around you smile too, and it made him upset that it wasn’t just him making you smile.

Your hair, how every single hairstyle suits you, how it flows across your face, and how you always brush it back when it frustratingly gets in your face. One of his favorites and loved taking a picture of it along with the pout on your face.

Your eyes, which spoke a thousand words and held millions of stars and also one of the millions of things he loved about you, and seeing it on a picture didn’t make sense as you needed to see it in person to make you feel butterflies on your stomach.

Every move you did was captured on his camera, and you didn’t even realize the tears have already gone out of your eyes.

He made you beautiful.

He made you feel beautiful,

Because you always were.

You didn’t need to be pretty in everybody’s eyes, you just needed him.

You were already in the last picture, and oh were you certain chanhee wasn’t the one who took this. You felt thankful enough Changmin, your other friend, had quite the skills in taking pictures too because this.. was just perfect.

You didn’t need to be pretty in everybody’s eyes, you just needed him. Because he is what completed you.

It was a picture taken afar of you sleeping in the library on one of your college days, and Chanhee was supporting his head with his palm, looking– just looking at you with heart eyes.

“Oh my fucking god,” You sighed out, crouching as you messily wiped your tears away, though it still kept on spilling.

“You’re finally here.” That sweet, familiar voice that enchanted you sighed out, from the corner of the four-walled place. He was leaning on the wall, looking as if he had finally had the burden out of his chest. “So, what do you think?”

Just like the pictures, you didn’t need words. You just throw yourself at him, nuzzling against his neck as you cried like a baby.

He sighs out again, relieved, as he buried himself more to you and engulfing each other’s warmth. His hands continued to calm you down by caressing your back, and you tried your best to stop crying.

Chanhee pulls back, taking your face to his hands and wiping your tears away.

“Hey, look at me,” He leans closer to you, lifting your face up softly. “If you didn’t get the whole point of this exhibition then.. I might just smack you in the face.”

You let out a small defeated laugh, wiping the tears yourself.

“I love you too if that was what it meant.” You look at him straight in the eyes, slouching your shoulders. You took his face into your hands too, pressing your lips softly in his.

He smiled in the kiss, his hands making their way to your neck as he kisses you back.

More than perfect.

The moment you were both out of breath, you break the kiss but let your foreheads linger with each other, smiles on your faces.

“Just.. how many times have you tried doing this?” You whisper, taking ahold of his hand and intertwining your fingers.

You pull him in front of the last picture you’ve seen, now clear as ever without your tears on the way.

“Oh, I think out of my hundred and fifty exhibits you missed,” You roll your eyes, the sarcasm his voice spilling. “It's my 98th try. That’s why I really needed you to come.” He looks at you, thinking it was much better seeing you in person rather than just a photograph– as if it's like the first time seeing you all over again.

“And if I didn’t come? Would you really have the guts to break this friendship?” You face him back, taking his other hand.

“No, I didn’t mean it like that. I just meant I’d take it in my own hands and just.. straight up confess.” He craned his head sideward, challenging you.

“I’d been feeling very weird these days too, I just realized how much I am so in love with you if it weren’t for your art speaks words I want to deliver to me,” You chuckle, making him throw his head back.

Perfect.

Chanhee loved everything about photography, and he loved photography because it’s able to take what’s beautiful and he can cherish it forever. He loved it because not only it can take pictures of his friends, or nature, or what he found beautiful and calming, but it has the power to turn everything into a memory he can keep. He loved photography, he loved taking a picture of you, he loved you.

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inessencedevided · 2 years

Note

With the year ending, let's look back at what we did! What are your favorite creations you did or the ones you think deserve more love? Send this to 5 other creators to share the love

Hey anon i know it's been a while ^^ thanks also to @lanwangiji @yiling-recesses @manhasetardis and (kind of) @rose-nebulijia for tagging me 🥰💙

Here goes in no particular order:

My fic Craquelure & Coverups with art by @inyourorangeshirt (this is so far my most popular mdzs fic and also the one i myself like the most of all my fics. I'm just really proud of this one)

My fic Sunlight through an open window with art by @i-put-the-bi-in-suibian (with nearly 45k this is my longest and also my most plot-heavy fic to date. It also brought me a wonderful friendship with Kate that I wouldn't have missed for the world 💖 in general I'm really proud of the amount of fic I wrote in 2021. I more than quadrupled my word count on ao3 this year which is just ... wild. And even though my writing isn't perfect I can see a clear improvement from the first fic I posted to now :))

The many new beginnings series which i started in 2020 but finished in 2021 (this was in my pre knows how to use the gradient curve layer properly time so the results of my colouring varies wildly here but it's nice to see the progress i made since then! I also still really like the theme. I'm trying to think of life more in terms of it being a series of beginnings 💙)

This lwj art nouveau piece i made for @sweetlittlevampire's bd (there's still a wwx counterpart to this sitting in my wip folder which i will deliver on at some point, preferably before rima's next bd 😅)

My first try at an art nouveau wangxian piece (this one i initially didn't like enough to give to rima for her birthday but it's since really grown on me :))

Lan Zhan is a good boy (need i say more? Of course he is! :D the moving text layer in this was so much work. Mostly bc of the way I made it go behind lan zhan which meant I had to mask every frame individually. At the end i couldn't even save the PS doc bc it was too large. This set cost me a night's sleep but it was worth it 😅)

This german lan xichen set (the idea for which is as old as the idea for the @mdzs-language-fest that @rose-nebulijia and I hosted. It was so fun and I'm honestly really proud of us that we actually put it together 🥰)

The juniors and the legacies they carry set that i did for the creator's exchange event based on @lan-xichens set and this lan sizhui set (tied at the same spot because both of them were born out of an intense love for the ducklings and the ways they learned from their seniors' mistakes)

How could I forget the famous blue raincoat yunmeng twin heros set (which still makes me go feral every time I see it. Tysm to the anon who asked for these lyrics)

this wangxian invictus set (this one is also from earlier in the year and i think I'd do a few things differently now but it was still a ton of work and I'm still very proud of it 💙)

For some of these i was legit shocked when i realised i made them less than a yesr ago. Time truly doesn't mean anything anymore 😅

Thank you to everyone who has made this year special! To the new friends I've made through various event and collaborations and the old friends that stuck around 💙 it's been sich a crazy year woth lots of ups and downs and lately the downs have started to outnumber the ups for me. Still, this fandom, my mutuals, the fics I've written and read and every tag under one of my edits have made it so much brighter 🥰

Here's to a better year 2022 for all of us! 🍀

I'm tagging @sweetlittlevampire @suibianjie @i-put-the-bi-in-suibian @jingyismom @ghost-generals @gusucloud @wuyus @fengqing @lanzhansmiles @kutyozh @candicewright @unforth @yibo-wang @betweencrossedblades @aheartfullofjolllly and @rinielle (no pressure as always 💙)

#tag game #2021 in review

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lunabonita · 3 years

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My Webtoon Recommendations

These are webtoons that are all 10/10 for me. Of course it doesn’t have to be a 10/10 for you, so just a reminder, do not attack me for liking a webtoon that you do not. These are my opinions and we are not going to have the exact same taste. Please be respectful.

Your Throne

Genre: Fantasy

Chapters: 75

Status: Ongoing

“Tensions are brewing under the seemingly calm surface of the Vasilios Empire, a kingdom ruled by the Imperial Family and the Temple. Lady Medea Solon has lost her place next to Crown Prince Eros, but resolves to win back whats rightfully hers. Will she reclaim her throne?”

You know whats amazing about this webtoon? The summary leads you to think that what shes winning back is the prince. Wrong. Shes trying to win back the throne. I love how this webtoon doesn’t try to make it a girl focusing her goals on a man, but on power. Medea is such a strong and well written character that you can’t help but love her.

The second protagonist Pschye, who of which is the person who took Medeas place as Crown Princess, is the complete opposite of Medea. At the beginning you hate her, but as the webtoon goes on and Medea and her get a better understanding of eachother due to them switching bodies as a wish from God, you begin to root for them as they team up to take over the throne from the Crown Prince.

The art is so beautiful and I constantly found myself at awe from the amount of detail put into it.

The Makeup Remover

Genre: Romace

Chapters: 78

Status: Ongoing

“After years of being told to focus on studying, Yeseul feels lost when she starts college and is suddenly expected to pay attention to makeup. When a chance encounter with brilliant makeup artist Yuseong leads to her taking part in a televised makeup competition, Yeseul begins to question the role that makeup and appearance play in society.”

This was created by one of my favorite webtoon creators Lee Yone. Their art is just so amazing and their stories always include such good topics.

For instance, The Makeup Remover’s theme is loving yourself for who you are. It shows how people treat you based on your looks and as someone whos struggled with that kind of thing for a while, this webtoon really touched me. The main character Yeseul is such a relatable character, even when trying to reject beauty standards, she still came subject to the pressures of living up to the people around her. She struggles with trying to love her own appearance and I really like that this webtoon didn’t try to be like, ‘fuck the beauty standard im better than that screw pretty people!!!’ it actually showed realistically how people struggle with self-image. I also love the main love interest because oh my god, we need more men like him please. He doesn’t care about Yeseul’s appearance and genuinely loves her for her personality.

Also, art is amazing. The author is so talented and you should support them by reading and liking the chapters.

Surviving Romance

Genre: Horror

Chapters: 14

Status: Ongoing

“When Chaerin Eun becomes the protagonist of the romance novel she is reading, she expects a fairytale ending with the novel’s love interest, Jeha. But when a bizarre twist makes her realize the story is not playing out as it does in the book, she’ll need the help of an unlikely character from her class to defy the new storyline and find her happy ending - if only she can figure out who this ‘Unknown Extra’ is first!”

Hands down one of my favorite webtoons by a long shot. You ever see a webtoon and think, ‘oh yeah, thats going to be a good webtoon’? Thats how this webtoon was for me. It was so good that I spent hours searching for other chapters that hadn’t been uploaded to webtoon yet on other manhua websites. I discovered it because it was also by the author of ‘The Makeup Remover’.

If there is one thing you need to know about me, its that I am a huge horror fan. So when I saw that my favorite author on webtoon had a horror themed webtoon out? You bet your behind that I binged it. Let me tell you, best choice ever.

Think of it as if ‘Ino’s Law’ and ‘Quarantine’ were combined with amazing art and a badass MC.

The Remarried Empress

I love how it is set up to the point where she cannot ‘quit’ until she completes the novel. Creating scenarios where she must survive while meeting the standards in the book. It is such an amazingly written webtoon and I cannot wait for more chapters to be released.

Genre: Fantasy

Chapters: 82

Status: Ongoing

“Navier Ellie Trovi was an empress perfect in every way - intelligent, courageous, and socially adept. She was kind to her subjects and devoted to her husband. Navier was perfectly content to live the rest of her days as the wise empress of the Eastern Empire. That is, until her husband brought hone a mistress and demanded a divorce. ‘I accept this divorce… And i request an approval of my remarriage.’ In a shoking twist Navier remaarries another emperor and retains her title and childhood dream as empress. But just how did everything unfold? “

Am I in love with Navier? Yes.

I absolutely adore how this story was set up. The first chapter begins with the big divorce scene, followed by Navier saying that she was going to be remarrying someone else since he wants to divorce her. This sets up a picture that gets completely shattered as you read the chapters. How everything falls into place with the reason behind the divorce and the remarriage is just so well written. The art is so good and and everything is just so insanely well done.

I absolutely love Naviers character, from her regalness and devoted loyalty to her role as empress, all the way to her petty moments and times of sadness. She is truly a character that you want the best for, and I cannot image anyone not liking her. Also the story is just so capable of making you feel emotions. I’ve laughed, cried, and got angry during the course of reading this webtoon. I love how betrayed I felt when the emperor brought home his mistress. It felt like I was in Navier’s shoes!

This is such a well done webtoon and I'm so excited for Navier to get all of the good things she deserves in her new Kingdom and with her new husband.

Witch Creek Road

Genre: Horror

Chapters: 74

Status: Ongoing

“A survival horror about love, acceptance, death, and revenge. And sexy flesh-eating demons. Yeah, it has those, too.”

This series seriously mind fucked me. The way that this story is set up, you don’t see the full picture until the later chapters. Season two literally blew my mind. It is also very gorey so keep that in mind if you don’t like that kind of stuff, but for me that makes it all the better. It is just so wild and crass that you can feel your heart pumping in anticipation.

They even have their own website that goes further into the lore because it’s just so wild. Also the art style is just so amazing, because it complements the story and horror theme so much. You hate most of the characters because they suck, and it is so satisfying when they are killed. Also it has it’s sad moments but I think it is a nice break from the horror so it isn’t so overwhelmingly scary.

I binged this series and I recommend reading only a few chapters a day so you don’t overload your brain.

Other then that, an amazing webtoon. Seriously, go read it, support the author, so much work goes into the story and art that it’s insane.

Dating With A Tail

Genre: Romance

Chapters: 36

Status: Ongoing

“On the dawn of her 29th birthday, unlucky-in-love Yunha discovers a shocking family secret: she’s started growing a fox tail, the mark of an ancestral curse. She must find her fated love before her 30th birthday or she is destined to become a fox forever! Even with her new-found enchanting power to attract men using her scent, will one year be enough to break the curse before it’s too late?”

Oh my gosh this is just such a good webtoon. It has amazing art, story telling, and characters. The true love interest was there the whole time, the villain isn’t who you’d expect it to be, and the spirit who cursed her is just! Im not going to spoil it but go read this webtoon!! It is so good and deserves more love.

Also Yunha is just so relatable?? Like she put off finding the woodcutter (her fated love) for 29 years and waited last minute to find him. Homegirl is me trying to do a project for school. Also to get rid of the scent that makes men attracted to her, she just starts eating a ton of garlic and that is just so funny to me.

Also I would go to church for the priest anytime if you know what i mean ;)

Omniscient Reader

Genre: Action

Chapters: 53

Status: Ongoing

“Dokja was an average office worker whose sole interest was reading his favorite web novel ‘Three Ways to Survive the Apocalypse.’ But when the novel suddenly becomes reality, he is the only person who knows how the world will end. Armed with this realization, Dokja uses his understanding to change the course of the story, and the world, as he knows it.”

I cannot get over how high quality this story is. The world building is phenomenal, the art is fantastic, and the characters are very fleshed out. This deserved all the hype it has gotten so far and more.

I love the ‘mc thrown into a different reality’ trope so much. Just like with surviving romance, Dokja’s world became the story he was reading. Also a very cool aspect of the story is the level up and the fact that its like a game. Earth has turned into this show for god like creatures to watch and it follows Dokja trying to survive. I also really like that TWSA has a protagonist, but Omniscient Reader’s protagonist is not the protagonist that was in TWSA. There is just so much lore and I’ll say it again, the world building is just phenomenal.

The Ddokkaebi’s and Dokja’s interactions are also just some of my favorite moments from the story so far. And oh my goodness I would die for Lee Gilyoung. Thats it, thats the tweet. That little boy could probably kill me with his giant praying mantis and I would let him if it would make him happy.

Not So Shoujo Love Story

Genre: Comedy

Chapters: 45

Status: Ongoing

“Romance super-fan Rei Chan is ready for her first boyfriend and she knows just who it’ll be: the most handsome boy in school, Hansum Ochinchin. But her plans for the perfect story are derailed when the most popular girl in class declares herself a rival… for Rei’s heart?! This is the year her not so shoujo love story begins!”

This is just such a cute webtoon. The style is very appealing and while the humor can be childish and weird sometimes, it still has made me laugh a lot. I know the humors not for everyone but just keep in mind that it does get better as the story progresses and gets more serious.

Also its a gl! I’m really unable to find good gls these days that don’t fetishize wlw relationships. Rei being painted as a mean trouble maker whos just misunderstood and Hana being the ‘perfect girl’ who only wants Rei’s attention is such a cute dynamic. They balance each other out and better each other. Also stan Rei for constantly sticking up for Hana even if she doesn’t necessarily like her in the beginning, she has very good morals and sticks to them.

Also the defying stereotypes in this webtoon? Just god-tier. Really makes you think twice when you judge someone just on first impressions alone.

Odd Girl Out

Genre: Drama

Chapters: 264

Status: Ongoing

“After a successful winter break makeover, Nari is finally ready for her high school debut. But somehow, she ends up friends with the three prettiest girls in school! Follow Nari as she tries to navigate her brand new high school life surrounded by beauties.”

This story has made me cry multiple times. A lot, even. It is just such a beautiful tale of friendship and finding support in people who are unlike those around theme. It also tells a great story about how anybody can be the ‘odd girl out’. Be it the fat girl, the beautiful girl, the rich girl, or the laid back girl.

It goes so deep into its characters that you even feel bad for the minor antagonists. It really makes you feel for the characters and the reasons behind their actions. Also I know its long, believe me I binged all 260 chapters in the span of three days, but oh my god it is worth it. Also I know the art is kind of off-putting, in fact that’s kind of why I put off reading the story, but I’ve honestly grown to love it and the writing is so good that the art could be literal stick figures and it wouldn’t matter.

The story is amazing and also I just love Nari. She’s just the best.

Gremoryland

Genre: Horror

Chapters: 67

Status: Completed

“Six old school friends are invited to be the first visitors of GremoryLand, a new horror theme park that promises an experience as unique as it is spooky. But once this experience starts there is no turning back, and they find themselves tested beyond what they imagines, facing their most desperate fears in order to survive.”

This is definitely one of those stories were you kind of need to turn of your brain and choose to ignore ‘plot holes’ while reading the early chapters because this story definitely gets crazy if you don’t know the ending. Believe me if you stick with it it will all make sense and the satisfaction you get from finding the ending is just so worth it.

The story is so good, and who Gremory is you would literally never suspect. When it was revealed who Gremory was and how he was able to create Gremoryland is so fucking mind boggling that you would never guess. I had to do a double take. It wasn’t like one of those random characters with a vendetta type of twists, but like one you can pick out from clues throughout the story.

Its so good and twisted and just so worth at least giving it a chance.

These were some of my favorite webtoons on the app! Of course it’s not all of them because unfortunately there is a 10 image limit. I also made this because I’ve run out of new webtoons to read and would love if you guys commented some of your own recs. I can also do a part two with other ones I liked if y’all want more recommendations. You guys can even request specific categories like Drama or Sci-Fi and I can tell you my favorite ones from that genre.

Also a reminder - if you disagree with any of my praise of these webtoons be respectful about it. At the end of the day it’s my opinion and you don’t need to be rude when disagreeing with that opinion.

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