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robo-milky · 4 months

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Your Rook would love you unconditionally and go to all four corners of Twisted Wonderland and back for you to hunt whatever beast you wish on a whim. His presence like the sun, warm and always there— adding light into world with each step he takes.

My Rook would play me like a fiddle with his sweet words and lead me on, only to disappear and fawn over someone else once he’s bored 😍

#this is a joke I promise-#i am rook’s 1 fear <33 #not saying he will but if rook cheats on me/cloche- I’d be the one begging on my knees and asking what I did wrong #rook can have whoever HE wants- I’m just the trophy wife that’ll stand on the sidelines and support his decisions no matter what 🥰🥰🥰#I’d go trad wife for him and only him /JJJJJ #meowing 🌸

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poorly-drawn-mdzs · 1 month

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Knowledge Revenge.

#dungeon meshi #chilchuk tims #senshi #Somewhat of an unofficial sequel to the Dragon Comic. I promise I have more versatility in my jokes. I just had to take this opportunity.#Senshi is pretty much a recluse. I think he would know a few of these 'gottems' but not all.#Chilchuck would know gottems that are nearly lost to time. The deep cuts. The ones that you fall for because they are that obscure.#I would also like to take a moment to confess that after the last comic in which I posed a gottem -#I fell victim to a Mind Goblin Attack. I was thoroughly got. I will be on higher alert this time.#So NOBODY be funny in the tags. I am gullible and I like to share things with my friends. Who are *ruthless*.#I have a mild resistance to Vicious Mockery at this point but I can only take so much.#Happy Thistle Thursday Everyone! See you next week!

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addsalwayssick · 3 months

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Remus opened his letter, surprised when it appeared to be a howler. The last time he’d heard one was the day before Sirius got disowned back in 5th year.

He was in the dining hall for breakfast, sitting at the staff table. He watched as Harry and Hermione plotted, looking anxious. He blew it off, as it seemed Harry was always weary.

“A howler,” Snape sneered from beside him.

“Astute observation, Severus.” Remus told him, nodding at him.

Remus disregarded Snape, and focused on the howler. There was no name on it, so it was possible it was from a student playing a prank. In good nature, for the prankingnostalgia, Remus opened it.

There was silence for a moment before a loud, booming voice started to yell. “DARLINGGGGG, GUESS WHOS BACK FROM JAIL” And it was his Sirius Black. And he knew they would find each other again.

#remus lupin #sirius black #james potter #sirius #jegulus #sirius x lupin #wolfstar #regulus and evan and barty #sirius and regulus #remus and regulus #DARLINNG #IM BACK FROM JAIL #and yeah #addie writes #i’m so sorry #this is a joke #i promise

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phantomrose96 · 9 months

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Im usually much too shy to send asks but you gotta be the change you want to see, and i agree that asks need to stay so: would you rather right 1 horse sized rat, or 100 rat sized horses?

ah yikes... so my knee jerk reaction is "the 100 rat-sized horses, certainly, as those can be picked off one at a time." however the risk of my conscience catching up to me by the 30th or 40th horse is too great. how much death could I inflict upon these rat-sized horses before I vow to see death no more? even if pure survival instinct drives me through all 100, what of the aftermath? surrounded by the carnage of 100 tiny horses with only my own wet breath among 100 still chests? inconceivable. war is hell.

#lordlochness #thanks 4 the ask very thought provoking great ice breaker #(considering you may have just seen my post at random and dont follow me: i promise im joking)#clearly id decimate all 100 rat sized horses without remorse #(also joking!!!)#(probably)

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egophiliac · 1 month

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But … how the staff swear? We Need to know that too…(of you want of course … love your art and your Amazing humor!!!)

(thank you! :D)

Trein: said 'damn' once when he was sixteen, still lays awake at night in embarrassment about his deplorable lapse in manners.

Vargas: swears like an old-timey carnival strongman. lots of "poppycock" and "what the devil" and an occasional "deuces!" (this makes classes very confusing for poor Deuce)

Crowley: doesn't intentionally swear, but every once in a while he'll, like...put together a presentation on the new staff policies or something that builds up to an acronym which, by complete coincidence, spells out something shockingly depraved.

it happens often enough that you'd think he's doing it on purpose, except. it's Crowley.

Sam: swears in the text, gets away with it because the character reading is always something else

(this is very specific to the Japanese version and probably too meta but I made myself laugh with it, I...I'm sorry)

#art #twisted wonderland #yeah here's some more characters swearing #i promise i will get back to actual Jokes™ at some point #(sorry for spamming a bit! just catching up on things)#anyway thanks for joining me for today's edition of crewel being slapped in the face with a sudden and unwelcome sense of sonder #trein: mister crewel need i remind you that i also have access to the internet #crewel: la la la i can't hear you #trein: i am aware of the existence of websites other than those that exclusively provide cat videos #crewel: lA LA LA --

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altruistic-meme · 27 days

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i know it's been said a million times by now but Neil making the FBI agents give him a to-go container before going with them to the headquarters and then pulling it out MID INTERROGATION to continue eating is so fucking unhinged. i love him so fucking much. i fully believe that was a completely intentional power move on Neil's part i doubt he was even that hungry he just wanted to be a little bitch.

#aftg #tsc #tsc spoilers #the sunshine court #listen i promise im thinking about jean and jeremy too but those thoughts are harder to joke about #and also harder to organize #whereas my neil thoughts mostly consist pf 'i love this piece of shit so fucking much he is completely insane'#shh ac #neil josten

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onionninjasstuff · 10 months

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First | Previous | Next

#rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles #rottmnt #rottmnt leo #rottmnt raph #rottmnt splinter #separated au #villain au #TECHNICALLY i kept my promise #coz a week is a 7 days period #sorry if its scuffed last few days were super rough for me #non-stop freaking out #the writers block has been blocking #the jokes have not been joking #the speech bubbles have been trying to murder me again #but i think im doing a lil better now #april soup in the next one??#villain pb&j duo

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lynxxpaw · 3 months

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can we get some narilamb pretty please? 🥺

Anytime.

#it's a joke JKSNFKJCNVXM i promise im gonna whip up some narilambs <3 #should i even tag it. decisions decisions #cult of the lamb #cotl lamb #cotl narinder #narilamb #<<<<<< I GUESS

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daily-crabbys · 10 days

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This Friday's meme: cold blooded killer

#meme fridays #my crab memes dont feel super funny but i promise im hilarious #im just really unhinged and a lot of time it is Not crab related #so i cant be true to myself #smh #thats a joke i dont care too much LOL

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poorly-drawn-mdzs · 1 month

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Don't Wormy About Me.

[First] Prev <–-> Next

#poorly drawn mdzs #mdzs #jiang cheng #wei wuxian #yu ziyuan #Please allow me to make it clear how important I think the hug between YZY and JC is in regards to several aspects of their characters #For one - it is the resolution and reveal that behind all the harsh words and bitterness...She really did love her son.#A hug is a soft gesture that you would never expect from someone like YZY and the fact she shows JC this affection now -#-Tells us how she knows that this upcoming battle is a death sentence for her.#Her giving away Zidan is honestly overkill but another sign of her truly showing him how she loves him and wants him to survive.#The dread of knowing she's walking back to a fight without zidian and trying to keep up brave face one last time...chilling.#Zidian represents legacy and promises. And this is going to both save and destroy Jiang Cheng as he carries this weight alone.#Heartbreaking stuff! Didn't draw it in the comic because I wanted to draw a silly worm on a string!#WWX tried to help JC out of the knot but got stuck in it.#Those worm on a string tricks are harder than they look!#Also; it's been about a year since the last boat joke - but indeed this is the 11th boat of pd-mdzs. No need to do the math.

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bambi-on-the-ps3 · 8 months

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FUCK HIM UP FRIDAY 🔥🔥🔥

REBLOG TO FUCK HIM UP

#the amazing digital circus #tadc #tadc jax #tadc zooble #LAST TIME IM MAKING THIS JOKE I PROMISE #transfem harold reference

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adreamfromnevermore · 2 months

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You ever think about how often Bruce goes to introduce a vigilante/anti-hero/ex or current villain to the League and ends up revealing too much about his taste in partners?

He's like, this is Ghostmaker/Catwoman/insert love interests here, they occasionally do bad things. But currently they're on an upswing so we're trying out not doing the bad things.

And someone *cough*Hal*cough* goes to make an exes joke and the uncomfortable silence is far more telling than literally any information the Bat has ever offered up in a meeting.

Hal: Oh, he does crime sometimes? Does he occasionally do you too?

Bruce:.....

Minhkhoa: Cackling, in tears behind the mask

Hal: is this why you turned me down? Is it the lack of crime? I CAN change that you know

#he cant introduce anyone to the league #i promise im not bullying hal #just of the OG leaguers I knew #hes the one that feels right for that joke #dc #bruce wayne #batfamily #justice league #minhkhoa khan #batman #hal jordan #ghostmaker #green lantern #ghostbat #batlantern #kind of #hal wants there to be at least

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egophiliac · 8 months

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I love the idea of teenage Malleus hating his new baby brother Silver but slowly falling for him

words cannot express how much I adore that Mal's reaction to seeing a human baby for the first time was "the fuck is this. why does it look like that. gross." (then he immediately got stuck on babysitting duty and the rest is history)

I am SUCH a sucker for that trope of "non-humans being fascinated by normal human behavior", so between that and all the delicious angst going on I was eating VERY well. >:) Malleus being so impressed that two-year-old Silver can walk, because it took him twenty years to stand on two legs! Lilia barging in on the Zigvolts at 2 AM being like "he won't stop crying what do I do"! Lilia trying to feed Silver rats and Malleus being like "...please just stick with what the books say to feed it"! it is all so. chef's kiss.