#their storyline is just too good to not think about nonstop | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

dangermousie · 1 year

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I confess that the narrative of TTJ in the sect learning how to be a human properly was always my favorite part of the novel even if it wasn’t a romantic portion of the story. So I am so excited the drama kept it (with bits of the Cang Jiumin dream storyline, they meld seamlessly.)

(I love that he actually gets a name chosen with care and not one that is expression of hatred and bad luck!)

Look at how shocked he is the master is all “the sword is yours, keep it.” He is so not used to care and kindness.

Honestly, it’s little things that get me, like how he’s so awkward being hugged by the blind lady and you realize he’s still not used to being touched in gentleness and love.

It’s just such a pleasure watching TTJ find acceptance and care in the sect - finally a decent parental figure in his master and then also the sect brothers who just accept and like him, do not view him as a monstrosity (he didn’t have such matter-of-fact acceptance even during his emperor days for obvious reasons.) This is the longest stretch of normalcy he’s ever had and he needed it so badly (and the fact that it comes from sect master and brothers he destroyed in past timeline is extra glorious; it does show that we are our choices, we are not doomed to do the same thing over and over.) The fact that he probably got it because Susu broke his fate/curse and so he is not being pushed by literally the Universe into more and more suffering as a goad to turn him into devil god, is an extra bonus. And the thing that gets me so hard is - TTJ aka Cang Jiumin, thrives. He repays kindness with kindness - you watch him be a good student and kind to the old lady and practice well.

It makes me think of the scene in an early ep flashback where older nanny tells younger nanny that the reason TTJ has difficulty processing or understanding emotions and people is because of his fucked up existence. And she is proven right - he is clearly always an introvert but living a nice life full of physical and emotional caring (he does not go hungry, he is liked, he is taught, he is valued), he adjusts more and more. He soaks normalcy as a sponge and I think learns as much or more from this stretch as he did from Susu. Susu opened up the gate but it’s this time that really puts the seal on it (yes, I am mixing my metaphor.) He needed to love and be loved by at least one person to give the world a chance, but he now has demonstration that not the whole world is awful. Before he hated the world but refrained from damage because Susu loved it, but now perhaps he can learn to love it a little on his own behalf. (And it makes sense his fate was nonstop horror before - if you want someone to turn into a demon god who is in so much pain he wants to erase the universe into nothingness, you can’t give him a glimmer of hope or a positive outlet. You don’t want your would-be world destructor to go “I don’t want to end the Universe because I have a sect dinner on Thursday, and my wife and I are going on a vacay the following weekend, how about we check back in a few millennia.”)

He is so gentle with this random old lady and he’s able to analogize the two of them - that is empathy, really, something impossible for a person they claimed was devoid of feelings; he’s come so far all because he’s had normalcy and care.

And he tries to make her withered tree bloom because she wants it, tries so hard even tho he just met her (and that he tries with the help of charms Susu taught him - he really is a memorial to her in so many ways, a living breathing memorial.)

I love his conversation with the old lady btw, it is my favorite scene in the episode, where they talk about why people live. In some ways, despite his age he is pitifully young since he’s had so little normal experience. This isn’t just a mission to help and old lady, it is a mission to help him too.

The way it turns out she knew and yet still took it, because kindness is rare and precious...

I love his opening up, responding to honesty with honesty, care to care. He is like a mirror to the world, in so many ways, and when all it gave him was pain he dealt pain back, but he is slowly healing, slowly climbing out of his well of misery and abuse and seeing humanity in others and in the process finding humanity in himself.

It’s so interesting how he answers about people, not home, because he doesn’t have a home, not really. Nowhere where people are glad to see him and so there is no home for him because without care it’s just rocks and dirt and why does he care where he is.

Oh God, this killed me.

The way he ponders that!

The way this is written - it’s as if Susu translates the world to him and him to the world and without her as the conduit, he cannot judge his success or his worth or his morality. I am incoherent!!!

It is gutting that all he needed was a little push - a little choice, a little happiness. Look how quickly he learns - like when he talks about his wife to the old lady and old lady asks if he could get his wife back by becoming evil, would he, and he thinks and is tempted but says no because Susu would not have liked it. He has learned to put what she wants above what he wants (a change even from “hate me as long as you are here.”)

The way he figures out how to fulfill the old lady’s wish with his white lie and her response just...

Here he is with the old lady who passed away. I am verklempt....

It really is nature/nurture debate and the answer is pretty clear - if he was brought up with love and care instead of constant trauma and suffering - he would have been just lovely; he is climbing out of that abyss even after all the torment and without it he’d have been there so much sooner. Devil God actually is a manifestation the world’s cruelty creating its own monsters and seeds of its own destruction and I love that.

PS Devil God voice is proof that you can’t let the perfect be the enemy of the good (or evil in this case.) He should have taken the body/soul when TTJ didn’t care and was offering but he wanted to wait for the perfect host as opposed to 98% compatible and now he’s living (undying?) proof of the old adage of “you snooze you lose!”

#cdrama #luo yunxi #till the end of the moon

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oreharuuu · 1 year

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To be One (1)

Summary: Trying out the demo game for Yeri's new game was something you thought would be an exciting experience. You didn't think the first time you played the game would be so creepy.

Warnings: none

A/N: oop new series :) i wanted to focus more on the other series but it's too much of a good idea to pass on soooo

The feeling of boredness is seeping through your body. Glancing around at people around you having fun, you curse yourself for not having the skill to socialize with a lot of people.

You were invited by your childhood friend, Joy, to come to her annual party that she holds in her massive house every month. She told you it's because she's already used to having big parties like these for her friends, but you know deep down it's because she's lonely at home. So you never blamed her.

Plus her parties are actually fun and exciting. It's just you're not extroverted enough to initiate conversations first. Awkwardly smiling at old high school classmates, you tried to move away from the ever growing dance area near you.

Walking to the kitchen to grab another drink, you noticed the rest of your friends talking to each other, so you decided to talk with them instead of just standing at the party like an idiot.

"Hey, (name)! Where have you been?" Wendy smiled as she hugs you, Seulgi joining too before patting your back.

"Meh, not doing much. Just wanted to grab a drink before I saw you guys."

The three of you talked, catching up on what's going on with your life because it seems like everyone parted ways after graduating college, too busy with their own lives.

Wendy became a vocal teacher, teaching at a highly prestigious arts Academy with Seulgi joining her a few months later. Seulgi teaches dance, so you know the both of them liked their jobs but were too busy with the clashing schedules. Irene became a financial analyst, so of course she's working hard at her job that neither of your friends think that she joined this party. Wendy updated you that Joy is still doing modeling but she decided to take a break before continuing, wanting to relax for a bit.

"How's Yeri? Is she here?"

Wendy pursed her lips as Seulgi shook her head. "Honestly I don't know. A few people said that she's here, but I haven't seen her."

"I want to meet her," You pouted. "I heard she's developing a new game after the success of the first one. I've played it before and it was awesome!"

Yeri worked as a game developer. She worked at a relatively small company before they went successful with their first game. At first you didn't know what it's about, something called an 'Otome' game. But after playing it for a few days you were hooked. Maybe because you're a sucker for handsome men and the interesting storyline that made you played the game nonstop to earn many of the endings and achievements.

"I've played it too! Honestly Jisung's route was so exciting!" Seulgi squealed before you joined her as well.

"What?! I thought you agreed with me that Chan's route was better," Wendy gasped as she hits Seulgi on the arm. Seulgi and Wendy decided to debate on which boy is better, making you smile in amusement before deciding that the debate was going far too long. Excusing yourself you walked around the massive house, waving at Joy as she talks with people before going outside.

Not a lot of people were there, so you sat down on one of the chairs before exhaling loudly. Mindlessly scrolling through your phone, you didn't notice a figure walking right towards you before scaring you by grabbing your shoulders. Screaming, you flailed around before seeing Yeri laughing obnoxiously.

"You bitch! You scared me!"

"And I'll do it again if you'll have the same reaction," Yeri smiled as she wiped some tears away. You playfully stuck out your tongue before she sits down next to you, stretching her arms out wide before huffing.

"Why you lookin so stressed out? It's a party," You reminded her as she groaned loudly. "I do know that this is a party, but I had to accept a work call. So there goes my enthusiasm and now I'm just too lazy to go back into the mood."

"Work? Oh! About the upcoming game right?"

"Yup," She popped the 'P' as she grabs her phone. "It's already at phase three, which is pretty good. But it's still far from our target because we want the game to release in a few months."

You smiled as you peeked from her shoulder too see the concept plan. "Ooo, sounds exciting!"

"It is," She nodded. "But it's been kicking our asses. I don't know why but one of the lead developers just vanished all of sudden without any clues, like what the fuck? That's why we're panicking on what to do with the game."

You frowned before sipping your drink. Vanished? That just sounds unprofessional. "What do you by vanished?"

Yeri shrugged. "Don't know. His name is Johnny, good guy. But a few weeks ago he vanished without a trace. We thought he's been kidnapped or whatever but the police said that his belongings were all in his apartment. No suspicious activities whatsoever. It's like he...vanished from the face of the earth."

"Creepy," You shivered when a gust of wind hits you, reminding you of your thin clothes you wore because of Joy's persistence. "Well did any of you notice something weird in his behavior?"

Yeri frowned, humming as she tapped her finger on her knee. "I guess?" She started. "Before he's gone, he started acting weird. Saying the game was 'self aware' about our reality and it's alive all of a sudden. We just chalked it up as a joke, but it's weird thinking about it now."

You whistled. "Damn, that's actually scary. Imagine if the game actually came to life though, like that one Gravity Falls episode."

"Not scary to me, I'll gladly take Soos place for a hot babe to fall in love with me," Yeri snorted as you laughed. You both talked again about random topics, making you reminiscence about the time where all of you were just struggling college students trying to graduate. You remembered how all of you liked to stay at Irene's dorm, having sleepovers and working through assignments together even though you all have different majors.

Both of you fell into a comfortable silence, basking in each other's presence as you sip your drink while Yeri chewed her gum.

"Hey, (name)? You liked the first game that we released right?"

You huffed a laugh. "Not just me. Wendy and Seulgi were fighting about it before I walked away. But yeah, I really liked the game."

Yeri cleared her throat before clapping her hands together. "So! What if...I offered you to play our game?"

"Huh?"

"It's only an idea, but the team wanted another perspective of the demo game. Since Johnny decided to disappear," Yeri rolled her eyes. "What if I offered you to play it? We're at phase 3 so the game would still be a bit glitchy, but we're happy to accept—"

"Are you kidding me?!" You cut Yeri off, squealing in delight as you shook her body. "Why would I want to decline this offer? I would be so crazy!"

"Yes you would," Yeri snorted as she laughs.

"I'll be happy to play it! I'll give you guys some opinions about it too!"

"Great!" Yeri exclaimed before texting one of her coworkers. "But...don't spill any of this to Wendy or Seulgi. They'll kill me."

"Like they'll only kill you, they'll kill me too!"

♡

Thankfully, your work schedule was very flexible. Your company didn't need you exclusively on place at all times, so you can work at home where you're comfortable.

Already preparing drinks and snacks, you punched the desk in excitement as Yeri sent you the demo game through email. You downloaded the game before thanking Yeri through text, deciding to eat first as the game loads. When an unfamiliar tune started to play from your computer, you ran back to your room to find the game already at the starting page.

The game, 'Hala Academy', was basically an otome game like the previous one. Yeri did tell you that this game is more different in concept than the other one, so you're really curious on what she meant by that.

You clicked the start button, making yourself comfortable as you read through the short exposition text. Basically your a new transfer student at Hala Academy and you're trying to graduate the academy while falling in love with the many love interest on the game. Yeri told you that the system's more complicated than the other one, because essentially you still have to maintain good grades and your basic needs while juggling the storyline.

Unfortunately you can't customize your character yet because it's still in development, but your sadness soon brushed away with excitement as you started the game.

At first glance, it's all very polished. Yeri and her team did work on this game at the same time they're working on the previous ones. So you're really impressed by her work ethics.

Slapping your cheeks a few times, you clicked away as you read through text after text at the bottom so you know the basic storyline. You gasped when a boy appeared on the screen, jaw slack as you notice how good the art was.

Blonde hair, gorgeous eyes, a birthmark on the side of his eye; you described the man as angelic. You notice the bottom text appearing, hurrying to read it as you bit your lips.

"Hello there, you must be lost. A new student perhaps?"

You gasped again before squealing in shock when a deep voice spoke through your speaker. You didn't know they had voiceover! You held your face between your hand as you laughed out loud. The game just started and you're down this bad? You're royally fucked.

You quickly chose one of the options before waiting for a response.

"Ah, I was right then. My name is Yeosang, nice to meet you."

You clicked away whilst reading the text, eyes going back and forth between the text and the boy in front of you.

"Sadly I'm not your guide for the school tour today. But I can gladly escort you to the admin office so you could get your schedule there."

"Don't mind if I do," You smiled as you agreed with his offer. You noticed a heart appearing at the top of his head, the percentage of it slowly increasing.

Damn, this is more fun than the other ones.

Soon the scene changed where you assume the office is, Yeosang still on your screen.

"This is the office. The lady working here is great, but don't worry about her scary face. She's a softie."

Yeosang's face changed into a soft smile making you smile as well. A sudden ring made you jump in your seat before noticing it's the school bell. You noticed how fast his face changed from a happy smile to a sad one.

"Ah, I have to go to class. Oh! I forgot to ask your name, how rude of me. It's nice to meet you...?"

A box popped up asking your name. You hesitated, deciding to use your nickname you usually use for games or your real name. You decided to use your real name since it's only a demo, so you'll probably delete this one before downloading the finished one.

"(Name), what a beautiful name for a beautiful lady."

Your eyebrows raise in shock at how Yeosang said your name. Can they even do that? Usually they give some space before continuing with their line. But whatever, it's worth it anyway with his voice.

"It's nice to meet you, (name). I hope we'll have classes together."

"I hope so too," You mumbled as you clicked away, Yeosang disappearing from the screen as a lady popped up. Turns out it's a small tutorial before you actually play the game, making you hum in excitement as you played through the short tutorial.

Before you knew it, you went to classes. The work you did in class turns out was a small mini game, each classes holds a different game so you're not that bored. It's challenging enough and every time you win, you acquired different things.

"Okay, right now I have one letter. About twenty coins? And...a plushie?" You cocked your head, hovering above the items to find any description but you found none. So you texted Yeri, asking the purpose of these items.

Turns out the coins you could spend on different outfits for the boys, which is mind blowing. As for the plushie and letter, it's for maximizing your relationship percentage.

Closing the inventory, or your bag perse, you clicked away before another boy popped up. Your eyed widen at how broad his shoulder were, noticing the contrast between his body and face. His body looks muscular yet his face looks cute with cat-like eyes and a dimple.

"Hi there! You must be the new student. It's not common for the academy to accept students at this time. But don't worry about that! I'm Choi San, you can call me San."

"Cute," You mumbled softly, not noticing how San's character glitched a little when you said that. You picked one of the choices as you 'talked' with San.

"Oh yeah, our academy is very prestigious. That's why a lot of people are talking about you, especially someone entering with a scholarship."

"Yeosang? Yeah, I know him. He's my friend! He told us about you in class. I didn't believe him when he told us how beautiful you were, but now...I'll say your more than beautiful."

"My friends? Well...we're not always together. But! We do eat together if we can, if you want you could join us! It'll be so fun."

Just from these short interaction, San is a very interesting character. You noticed how he tends to ramble on and on, his voice talking first instead of the text like Yeosang did. Maybe it's a glitch?

When an option appeared where you could see your dorm, you didn't realize how San's character will follow you as the scene changed into your room.

"Ah! This is your dorm. Don't worry, we all start with the plain room. The academy will let you decorate so go wild!"

The tutorial popped up and you clicked on it, screen fading into black before the game showed you how to decorate the rooms and such. When the tutorial finished, you frown in confusion when you noticed how San was still there. But now...his face looked worried instead of the smile he wore.

You also noticed how another boy was beside him, with fiery red hair and a mole underneath his eye. Squinting your eyes you noticed how his face looked worried as well, before it changed into a smile.

"Ah! We were so worried when you disappeared on us like that!"

Disappear?

San opened his mouth before pausing. You noticed the game also paused, making you discover one of the first glitches you'll probably encounter. Before you knew it, a loading icon appeared before it's gone in a second, leaving your screen empty without any characters.

Only your room.

"What? Did the game crash?" You frowned. Clicking the exit button, you're more confused when the game played through like before, as if nothing's wrong. You decided to ignore the previous encounter and continue to play.

A lot of characters appeared, but you assume they're just for the plot to play out. Your so called enemy, Hwayoung, appeared and mocked you before leaving. It made you laugh at how lame her bullying was compared to the K-Dramas you've watched. It's only then you notice how it's already night in the game, making you go back to your dorm room.

But when you click the room icon, nothing happened. Clicking it numerous times didn't help as well so you closed the small tab containing the shortcuts for the game.

You screamed in fright when you noticed a pair of eyes looking at you closely before the game glitched out. You exhaled when the game returned back to normal, noticing a figure in front of you.

"I'm sorry! I didn't mean to scare you at this time, I was just walking to my room."

You sighed heavily as you brushed a few hairs away from your face, haphazardly clicking on an option that popped up whilst trying to calm your heart.

"You must be the new student. My name is Yunho, sorry again for the scare."

You frowned when you noticed how his eyes seemed familiar from the ones that stared at you. But only the eyes appeared, not the character. Was it even Yunho?

You clicked away to talk with Yunho, trying to ignore the growing uneasiness. The glitches in the game are so creepy that you had to report back to Yeri about it. Maybe tomorrow or when you compile enough evidence to report back to her.

Yunho seems nice, almost like a golden retriever. You giggle a bit when he tells a joke, noticing how his character flushed with red on his cheeks.

"Aww, so cute. I didn't know they could do that."

"Thank you."

Your smile dropped when you heard a response back from him. Did you hear that right? You shook your head, looking back at Yunho closely. Noticing how now his smile is tense, almost forced. Before you could click, his character glitches out in an instant, making you stare at the dark corridor of the school. As if Yunho never appeared.

Clicking back to your dorm, you sighed when the day finally changes to the second day. You hesitated to click on the exit game button, but decided you had enough for today. The game drifts to black before the cutesy theme song played and the starting screen was showed.

Turning off your computer, you shivered when you remembered back at the creepy glitches. Typing the problems on your phone, you decided to play tomorrow to collect enough evidence to show Yeri.

You just hope things are not as glitchy as the first time you played it. God you can't get that eyes out of your mind as you worked through the project.

#yandere ateez #ateez #ateez x reader #poly ateez x reader #yandere #ateez imagines #to be one

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soullessjack · 6 months

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I’ve been on TikTok a lot because my FYP has been infiltrated by SPN and most people on there think he has the mental mind of a 3 y/o or a baby. How is this possible to think with his storylines? It doesn’t make sense to me. I wasn’t in the fandom, just an avid show watcher, and I saw him similar to Amara and how she’s an adult that grew up fast except he was just born grown but naive because the world is complex. So how do people get to him having a baby mind? It feels ableist to me but I can’t figure out how to articulate why (like when someone has developmental disabilities and someone says, “They have the mind of a _y/o,” when that person’s needs/skills/etc are more complex) and I was wondering if you could shine some light on why you think this happens. I don’t think people understand why other people have uncomfortable feelings surrounding baby/toddler/kid!Jack but I can’t remove it from accidental ableism. I’ve tried talking to people about it on TikTok but they either double down or say that it’s my opinion. However, I don’t feel like canon supports theirs. Thank you. I love you your posts about Jack and your insight. Good work.

hi, thanks :3

genuinely I don’t know, and I ask myself that every single time I go through spn tiktok lmao. the best I can figure is, for one, TikTok is the app where media literacy and nuance go to die like dogs. there’s no arguing with anybody there unless you get lucky (source: I’ve argued).

two, I think genuinely it comes from the over-saturation of baby!jack content in the fandom, both in and out of tumblr, and the extremely minimal amount of content where he’s actually treated with nuance and complexity. like, it exists, but only in very small circles that the majority of the fandom clearly ignores. from what I’ve seen most of spn-tok is focused on TFW or Dean or Destiel and don’t generally care about Jack that much, so it kinda makes sense that they’d just run with the most prevalent idea of jack and not really think about it in the long run, or when they watch the show.

a lot of the arguments I’ve seen literally boil down to “he wears Velcro sneakers” and “he doesn’t know [insert thing]” or just his general social awkwardness/unawareness (which Cas displayed all the time in the early seasons but never got outright infantilized for). like look at this:

and there’s millions more comments like this, unfortunately. I don’t mean to speak for everyone, but at least for me, the body language and specific mannerisms Alex put into his portrayal of Jack is what resonated the most as an autistic thing, naïveté and poor social skills aside of course. Like, he fidgets/stims constantly—

and none of this is scripted for him to do, either! Alex just decided it worked, and he was right!!

—and to see these very blatant autistic traits be reduced down to “portrayal of a child/toddler” is downright sickening, especially when plenty of other autistic fans have pointed it out and expressed to Alex that they relate to Jack and even asked if he had done it on purpose because it was so well done.

what I’m personally confused on is how many people will double down on jack being a child like it’s driftwood in the ocean. like, going back to my argument, I gave the other person multiple points in the show that make it obvious jack is intended to be an adult. Harper, the beer, any of the trauma he’s endured; the works. and all they had to say to that was “you do you I guess.” and it’s like what do you mean, ‘you do you’? I’m giving you actual examples that happen in the show, and I’m asking you to think ‘hey, maybe if jack flirted with a girl and talked nonstop about what it’s like to fall in love and have sex for an entire episode and had his dad offer to go to a dive bar for bucket-list hookups in the episode after, maybe he isn’t a child.’

but again, this is TikTok, so asking for any kind of self examination is asking for too much.

it just strikes me as odd. it’s odd and confusing and horribly frustrating that people are dying on this hill like it’s some kind of civic duty. like, why does it matter to you so much to see Jack as a child? why is it so important for you to think of him that way, that you just ignore canon evidence and autistic voices to make yourself feel right? what was even weirder was they were autistic themselves, and said they wouldn’t dream of infantilizing him, but here we are. their reasoning was “he’s literally 3 by the end of the show,” and that was it. And of course they weren’t wrong, but if you look at every time Jack or anyone else acknowledges his age:

D: “how old do you think you are?”

J: “3 days, 17 hours and 42 minutes”

Dean shrugs and lets him drink beer.

M: “You should be six months old.”

J: “I am…sort of.”

Mary shrugs and treats Jack like a teenager from there on out

M: “Do you ever hang out? I mean, with kids your own age?”

J: “Well, I’m two…enty. I’m twenty…two. I’m twenty-two.”

While the show acknowledges Jack’s actual age, it’s arguably on the same level of acknowledgment of Cas being literally older than time, because what people strangely fail to remember is that Jack is not completely human and doesn’t have the natural aging or developmental process that humans do. He’s three in the same way Vision is three, and Vision is already married with children. Beyond that, there are plenty of times when Jack is referred to as a teenager or treated like one, like Dean’s “he’s a millennial” joke in Last Holiday (wrongly termed but the intent is still there). Hell, even in the scripts they’ll directly say things like:

“Jack is spiraling out, a teenage powder keg,” (13x06 Tombstone, deleted writer’s draft)

“Kelly can’t help but smile, so impressed by the man he’s become, but not about to let him out of her sight,” (14x08 Byzantium, prod. draft)

that make it pretty clear Jack is functionally an adult despite his unnatural age, just like Cas or Amara or even Emma (also the added bonus that Jack explicitly hates being called a child or treated like one, but people literally reacted to that like “oh silly baby wants to be in charge like a grownup” so, like, I don’t even know what to do with that) (and banking off of that, every other time Jack is explicitly put into an adult situation, like flirting with Harper and literally asking Dean how to have sex, sooo many notes on that gif set were the same parroted “nooo baby boy don’t corrupt your innocent mind!! dean is such a bad influence 😂😂😂😂”, so the obtuseness is very intentional). I try not to be accusatory when I talk about the way Jack is treated in the fandom, as a general for online discussion and because I know it’s largely unintentional, but I really do think Destiel (and Sastiel) have some hand in it.

If you look at the majority of Baby!Jack content, it all centers around how domestic either ship is with baby!jack, how good Dean is with kids (baby jack) and how much of a sweet older sister Claire would be, etc. It’s all for the sake of domesticity. It’s the white picket fence family dream that canon TFW2.0 doesn’t really quite have. It’s to make Dean and Cas and Sam and Cas and Claire and Rowena and whoever else, a softer version of themselves. It’s never actually about Jack. He’s just the cannon fodder; the prop; the dress setting; the accessory. He’s there to make everyone else look better and to fuel them forward. No matter how much people want to argue that it’s “giving Jack the childhood he should’ve had,” we both know it’s not actually about him, because canon coming in with the steel chair again: Jack literally chose to be an adult. He hates being considered a child and has never expressed anything more than wanting to be a regular teenager. And like I said, people on spn-tok are naturally Destiel centered, so it’s honestly not very surprising that they just can’t let go of this content cow because it’s just too cute and wholesome and precious of course, despite it being rampant ableism and just generally annoying to people who actually do care about Jack in a deeper sense. Gag me. So maybe that explains the doubling down, but then what gets even more confusing to me is, like, you can have a domestic family AU that doesn’t rely on erasing a character to fit a specific image. You can have a domestic family AU without being ableist about it. You don’t have to do any of the things you keep consistently doing. You even fucking already it in the show! Canon TFW2.0 is dysfunctional on various levels, but so was TFW, and so were just Sam and Dean. It’s simply their dynamic, and it’s what adds to their family bond being what it is to begin with. Nothing you’re doing is something you need to.

I wanna stop before this gets longer than it has to be, but for one final thought I think the general lack of care for autistic people in any space is part of it, too. It’s why half of our representation is painfully inaccurate or egregiously offensive; it’s why fandoms of media with autistic/autistic-coded characters almost always rampantly infantilize them (cough cough SheRa). And like with Alex’s mannerism choices, it’s the distinct yet subconscious connection between autistic behaviors and childlike behaviors, because autistic people are so largely treated as incapable innocent children and cannon fodder for their autism warrior parents; both of which reflect like direct sunlight in Baby!Jack tropes. And it’s why people just don’t care enough to do anything about it, to heed any criticisms about the harm they’re doing, because to them it’s not harmful. It’s not a problem that’s doing any perceivably “real” damage because they haven’t been personally hurt by it (except when it comes to unfair Dean criticism or Sam or Cas criticism, because that’s clearly more important than ableist rhetoric and representation erasure), and probably because they already hold those views to autistic people in the real world.

The world at large does not care for autistic people, or disabled people in general. Nothing that hurts us is considered anything serious. Nothing that matters to us is considered valuable or worth respecting. And because of that, we already struggle in the real world day by day, so we turn to online spaces for connection and sharing our interests safely. We turn here for community, only to be met with the same indifference and rejection as the real world, because the same people we’re trying to avoid are here too, and then we have nowhere else.

•••

**im probably going to make this a separate post but I also want to talk about the weird cognitive dissonance that the fandom has with babyjack and how it’s pretty much considered “acceptable infantilization,” and how so many people in the fandom have said they want more complex jack but still engage with content that actively erases Jack’s complexity and relies on that erasure to make him what he is).

***edit: tags 4 reach, absolutely feel free to ask for removal! ik it’s out of the blue but you guys have had some of the better takes on jack lol @angelsdean @hauntedpearl @uh-ohspaghettio @queermania

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anarchytaken · 1 year

Text

The Way to a Vipers Heart

You weren’t sure how your life became this way. For context, you're dead. Not living, unalive, not in the living realm, overall, cold body and heart not beating. How and why? To start, you’ll have to go to the life you had before, in which you were the sole heir of a wealthy family. That sounded good, right? Wrong. Your parents are not the best since they have high expectations of you being their child, and anything you do that doesn’t meet their expectations, they verbally abuse you. They expect a six-year-old to get a perfect score in math - middle school level math!? - when your six-year-old mind just wanted to play. Yeah, they’re delusional and narcissistic.

It wasn’t until you got older that you became aware of your situation, how unrealistic your parents' demands are, and how they clearly see you, their child, as an asset. And the cherry on top? The multiple assassination attempts on your life. You weren’t sure if they were rivaling families or companies, but at the age of ten, you knew you had to be cautious. If food or drinks were tampered with? You made one of the staff taste tests. If a maid tried to kill you in your sleep? Don’t worry, you have an alarm that will notify the guards. You can’t really rely on your parents since the last time you brought it up, they just said “Deal with it. You’re our child, so you should be able to handle it.”

Yeah, your parents were shitty.

You didn’t really have friends to play with or any extended family, and your parents made you watch documentaries of successful people or other educational stuff for your upcoming teachings to success. You had learned to dance when you were seven, but after obtaining an iPad, you discovered the world of dancing and music. You loved the varieties of dance styles, from contemporary to traditional and cultural dances from foreign countries, to some known styles such as salsa, waltz, and erotic pole dancing.

You had also used the Ipad to watch some non-educational videos when your parents weren’t home and you were alone. You were introduced to a colorful world of fun and creativity of games and gaming videos along with the drama side of news reports and Karen/Kevin activities.

You weren’t interested in pole dancing because it was sexual, you were just fascinated by the control and strength of the dancers, how their grip on the pole never faltered, and how they moved around the pole like a snake. It intrigued you. And when you were too tired to dance, you went to your other source of escape Twisted Wonderland. You didn’t know much about Disney since your parents found it ‘garbage’ in their words, but through the game, you had come to love the characters and development, the storyline, the lore of the game, and more.

Though, you think they should be called vampires instead since they seem to like to suck out the fun and common sense of people, plus, it’s an insult to people who are actually named Karen.

However, they weren’t enough to not make you wanna die. You didn’t have a stable adult figure to hold on to, and your parents didn’t seem to care about your well-being - well mental well being that is. You didn’t want to live this life. So the next and last dinner you had with your parents, you noticed one of the staff tampered with your drink. Again. But hearing your father drone on and on nonstop made you wanna end this. So with a dry and empty smile, you lifted the cup to your lips and downed the drink. In seconds, your throat burned and your guts were lit on fire, twisting in pain as you fell to the floor. Despite the pain, you smile wryly at your parents, seeing their expressions of fear as everything turned black.

You should’ve seen a light or something when you died, but instead, you felt your eyelids flutter open to a new environment around you. Granted, your body was still numb from the poison but you were able to open your eyes a bit. And the first thing to greet you was a roof made of sandstone, with intricate and elegant carvings that reminded you of one of those blocks from . . what’s that game called? Minecraft? You never played the game, but you watched some videos out of curiosity.

A few things caught your eye as you examined your surroundings groggily, the room wasn’t bare of decoration with a few posters, a lamp, a gramophone with a few discs near it, and a basketball. At your bedside was a statue of a tall man with a bearded goatee, a turban with a proud standing feather, and long robes. The man looked thin yet intimidating, as expected of the Sorcerer of the Scalding Sands.

Wait. . .why does that title sound-

“Jamil! You’re awake!”

As if by instinct, you turned to the young voice that sounded like a young boy. Your eyes met shining ruby irises that shone with tears, with dark tan skin that wasn’t as dark as the African race yet wasn’t tan like those overrated golden tan Greeks but rather dark in a sense of those Arabian people. The boy that looked around eight years old had short and choppy white hair - as in snow white type of white. His clothes seemed fit for a noble with luxurious clothing made of silk and golden trimmings, the bangles and pieces of jewelry he wore did nothing but show how much wealth he had. Though, the boy looked quite familiar. . .

‘Kalim’

Another thought that wasn’t your own voice as the body you were in let out an acknowledged hum. “Kalim, what are you doing here?” you had asked - no, the body you were in asked. The voice that came out of your mouth was young and definitely male, with a tinge of smooth silkiness in it. What did that boy call you?

‘Jamil,’ you realized. ‘As in Jamil Viper.’

‘How do you know me despite me not even knowing you?‘

Your fingers - no, Jamils’ fingers stiffened but Kalim doesn’t seem to notice. Jamil is still looking at the tearful Kalim, you’ll have to reassure him first before having this . . .explanation/discussion. You felt your consciousness take control of the body before you tried to comfort the young Kalim with a strained yet reassuring smile as you spoke, “You should go back, your father will not like it if you neglect your studies.”

Kalim, to your poor heart, only hiccupped a sob. “But, you got poisoned because of me!” A sniffle “I’m sorry.”

“I’ll be fine, just go or else your father will come here himself.”

Reluctant but obedient to his best friend, Kalim nodded before leaving the room. The moment he left, Jamil’s body immediately closed his eyes and you were in darkness once more. ‘Who are you?’ asked the depths of his mind as you stood alone. Then, out of the darkness, Jamil came towards you. He was young, around Kalim’s age, with short dark hair that was cut above his shoulders with a lone strand braided at his side and his signature bang that curved down to his chin. His skin was about the same shade as Kalim’s, a dark tan. His eyes were round almond-shaped eyes with bluish-dark grey eyes with thin yet finely shaped eyebrows. His face was scrunched into an expression of distrust and curiosity, a lone brow arched over his eye.

While you wanted to squeal at how cute he was, you knew this was no matter going gaga. This child is experiencing someone inhabiting - intruding - in his body and can’t understand how and why. You could feel the fear and confusion in his soul and mind, as expected of a child yet he tries to look strong. This was the last thing you expected, not only are you reincarnated in Jamil Viper but you’re also merged into one body with his soul. This scene feels familiar as if you saw a manhua with this exact set-up, but you can worry about that later, you have a child to explain to.

‘You know your thoughts and feelings are really easy to read.’ The young Jamil spoke, laced with a deadpan tone.

‘Your fear is also exactly hard to feel.’

Jamil huffed his cheeks at being caught, ‘Fair, but at least tell me who you are and why you are in my head.’

‘I will just relax first’

‘I am relaxed’

‘Kid, I could literally feel the uneasiness coming from your side.’

‘. . .’

After getting him to relax, you two now sat crossed legs in front of each other. You then explained your life before, your world, how you died, and how you have no idea how you got here. Jamil had scrunched his eyebrows at how your parents treated you, ‘Your parents suck, I can’t imagine my parents treating me like that.’

‘Wonder how that feels like,’

The boy giggled before shaking his head, ‘ That still doesn’t explain how you know me.’

Here’s the part where it could lead Jamil to an existential crisis and question his worth. ‘Yeah. . .about that. In my world, we have this mobile game - you know what mobile games are, right? Good. - Well, there’s this mobile game that’s called Twisted Wonderland - ‘

‘Why do I have a feeling that that game is connected to my world?’

‘Yeah, If I told you, your older self is one of the characters in that game in my world, how would you feel?’

The next moments of silence were torture as Jamil stared at you like a statue, his eyes dimming to a dull shade, but the emotions that were raging on his side of the mind were wild. They were muddled and mashed into something indecipherable, like a bunch of food colouring were put into the same water glass and swirled around to make this confusing and cloudy colour. The feelings were constricting in your throat, making you anxious and uneasy. You needed to calm him, and reassure him that his life isn’t a game.

‘I know it’s confusing, Jamil.’ You started, reaching out to place a hand on his shoulder. ‘But being here shows that your world isn’t a game, maybe it’s more complex than that.’

‘Complex?’

‘Meaning it’s not as simple. Maybe the games and shows in my world are like windows to other worlds and what we’re watching is just only a glimpse.’

The light in his eyes returned as he seemed interested in the theory, ‘That would be cool! Am I a cool character in your world?’

‘Kid, a lot of the players like you.’

Jamil let out a genuine smile before it fell as he widened his eyes, ‘I forgot to ask you for your name, how rude of me.’

Smiling at what innocence is left in him, you gave him your name. ‘So are we going to live in one body from now on?’

‘Seems that way,’

‘That’ll be hard.’ Jamil let out an adorable pout as he stared at the ground of his - and your - consciousness. You chuckled, ‘It will be hard, but I’m sure we’ll be able to do it.’

‘. . .All right, glad to be working with you.’

‘The feeling is mutual.’

During the next few days of your body recovery, you have gotten to know Jamil more and the world you’re in. It was still the Twisted Wonderland that you saw in the game, but with one difference.

‘You have alphas, betas, and omegas here!?’

‘Yeah, mama is a beta and papa is an alpha. I’m pretty sure Master Asim is alpha when I saw him last, and he has a harem of omegas. Which is kinda rare.’

‘Rare how?’

‘Omegas are rare from what mama and my teacher told me. A majority of the world is made up of alphas and betas.’

‘Really now, then what are you hoping to be, Jamil?’

‘Not sure, alphas are cool since they’re strong and they can command the area, but they have this thing called ‘rut’ and papa has it every once a month. . .it looks painful.’

‘What about omegas?’

‘They’re really pretty, papa and mama said that they have a sweet smell. But it’s kinda unlikely that I’ll present as one, and if I ever am one, being guarded twenty-four-seven sounds kinda annoying. Plus, they also have this thing called heat, not sure what that is but when they have it, they’re usually locked up in a room and won’t come out for a few days.’

‘I think you’ll learn about ruts and heats when you’re around ten or twelve, but I can teach you about those things.’

‘Really? Thanks! That’ll be helpful!’

‘No problem, so you want to be a beta?’

‘I don’t really see a problem with them, they’re okay. Mama is one and she doesn’t have any of those ruts or heats, so I’ll probably be one. Or I might be an alpha like papa.’

Yeah, you’re not in the original Twisted Wonderland. You’re in some alternate universe where A/B/O dynamics exist and secondary genders are the norm. But this isn’t a traditional omega verse, usually, omegas are seen as the lower class while alphas are the top-tier class. But in this omega verse, omegas are rare and seem to be treated more respectfully than alphas or betas. How peculiar.

When you and Jamil’s body were able to move without the effects of the poison, you were greeted with Jamil’s younger sister bursting through the doors and flinging herself on your body. Jamil’s body let out an oomph! before his - or yours since Jamil’s body is also your body as well - eyes looked down at a beaming Najma. “You’re finally better! I was starting to wonder if you’ll be stuck in bed forever!”

You let out a chuckle which the body mirrored as Jamil took control for the rest, patting his sister’s head before telling her to get off of him. Once Jamil managed to get his - perhaps also your sister as well - to leave, you managed to get out of bed and walk towards the vanity’s mirror. Upon taking a look at your reflection, you notice a difference in appearance.

It was a young Jamil’s body, of course with his short dark hair that was above his shoulders with brown highlights, his sharp eyes, and the baby fat present on his cheeks. What he wore right now was a long-sleeved shirt made of the lightest and softest material you ever felt with pants of the same material. The body wore sandals. But what caught your attention was the coloured circle that seems to surround the border of the body’s iris, a colour similar to your eye colour circling the dark grey irises like a gradient of some sort.

A jolt of realization followed by puzzlement let you know that it was Jamil. ‘That wasn’t there before. . . It kinda looks like your eye colour.’ He noted. Your blinking was reflected when the body blinked as well before Jamil leaned forward to examine his eyes. ‘Not gonna lie, looks kinda cool.’

You hummed as you took control for a second to walk out of the room, ‘I think it’s the result of us merging together. Since I’m in your body now, a part of my original appearance has to make it somewhere.’

‘Well, I suppose that would make sense, like putting together two bodies to make one body. Some characteristics of body number one will show while the rest of the characteristics of body number two will remain. Though, I don’t get why it’s only your eye colour.’

‘Perhaps it’s to not scare the people here, they would probably freak out when you go under a massive change of looks after a few days.’

‘I guess.’

From there, you watch and learn the routine that Jamil went through in his childhood, letting the young boy take charge of the body. The boy cooked the food with the rest of the servants - which you noticed were betas with few alphas - to your now employers, after that, the body went to make Kalim’s room clean. You had to hold yourself steady before you made a fool of yourself upon seeing the large and lavish room filled with shiny silk fabrics littered, a pristine white bed covered with a red blanket with golden trimmings. Jamil had given you an amused glance as he started his duty.

Throughout the day, you had gotten a sense of satisfaction as you felt the body’s fatigue but the satisfaction of a chore done before moving on to the next one. This is coming from a child that came from a wealthy family with servants. During his breaks, Jamil had shown you a clearing with his device which wasn’t a phone but something close to it with earphones. He smiled at you before looking around, ‘I think no one’s here, good.’

‘Are you hiding from Kalim?’ you asked the obvious, but just wanted humour.

‘Yeah, part of my duty is to keep Kalim company.’ Jamil had a pinched expression upon Kalim’s name, ‘But he’s so . . . annoying!’

You hummed in response, deciding to drop the topic for another time. ‘So what are we going to do here?’

Jamil’s expression brightened at the change of topic, ‘ I like to dance when I don’t have anything to do!’

A smile made your way at the word ‘dance’. ‘I love to dance!’

‘You too!? What kind of dance style? Street dance? Or is it the one that Kalim dances?’

‘I like to dance different styles. . .’

From there, you and Jamil exchange the types of dances that you know. Jamil had shown you the street dancing he talked about, the movement slightly clumsy but fluid and full of energy. When you took control of the body, you demonstrated the types of dances you learned from videos. The contemporary dances that you watched and showed you how they became successful. This dance is an interpretive dance that merges ballet, jazz, modern, and lyrical dances. From the videos you saw, the dancers were moving with the music, letting their bodies get swayed with the rhythm and tone.

By incorporating a bit of ballet and modern dance in it, you moved through the music as if you were trying to decipher what it was telling you.

When the high of the music and the body’s adrenaline and Jamil’s joy and excitement almost hit, a young voice shattered the world you were in. Jamil groaned within the confines of his mind as you made the body turn to see a beaming Kalim. “ Jamil, can I join you? You looked like you were having fun!”

You could feel the annoyance from Jamil’s side, so you decided to take control of the body till the boy cooled down. “ You could, but are you done with everything? Last I check, you had dance practice around this time.”

“The instructor caught a cold so I went to find you!”

The annoyance in Jamil grew and you had to refrain the body from twitching an eye in irritation. Jamil can’t really go against orders seeing his family’s position but compromising his comfort for Kalim’s is a bit of a problem. It’s one of the reasons why he went against Kalim in NRC. You need a compromise for this, Kalim is a nice boy and he sees Jamil as a friend so he wouldn’t mind adjusting for his friend’s comfort, right? You suppose the reason why Jamil didn’t really talk to Kalim about this is because of his subservient mindset and fear for his family. Still. . .

“Kalim,” you said, “Do you mind if you play with your siblings for now?”

“Huh?” Kalim’s smile dropped, “Why? Do you not want me here?”

You heard the slight panic in Jamil’s emotions before you spoke again, “It’s not that I don’t like you, but sometimes I want to be alone for a while so I go to places like here. To be by myself.”

Kalim had a look of understanding before smiling, “Oh, so you just wanted to be alone? Okay! Sorry, I disturbed your alone time.”

“It’s okay, perhaps next time I could play with you?”

“Yeah! We could play mancala!”

When Kalim left, it was you and Jamil alone. The young boy sighed, ‘That was reckless! Asking a master something like that is. . .reckless!”

‘But did he react badly?’

‘. . .No, I guess not.’

‘I know you’re not accustomed to asking Kalim things like this for your own benefit, but when you need it, I’ll take over and ask for you.’

‘That’ll be unnecessary of you,’

"We're gonna be in the same body for the rest of your life so might as well make myself useful.’

Yes, to avoid Jamil overblotting, you need to lessen his resentment and anger of Kalim and his position. But you know that with his family’s position as servants, that’ll be a bit difficult. But servants are also humans and have selfish desires as well, not all people are selfish and ready to serve after all. Perhaps while not trying to find a way to be free, since you’re still a child and you have a new family to think of, you can find ways for Jamil to indulge himself.

Jamil has shown to be smart and capable of many things and while the common mindset is that the master is better than the servant, there are a few exemptions on where the servant is better but the master can learn from this. Or, at least that’s what you’re thinking. Perhaps you can show-off Jamil’s skills while also having the Asim family benefit from it, kinda like showing the esteem and prestige of the family by showing the kind of servants they have in their household?

Although, that might be risky.

. . . Maybe you could teach Kalim to be more independent and capable, guide him to be at least a bit cunning and able to do things on his own. By doing that, you’ll be able to lessen Jamil’s load of work in the future.

“You want to help Kalim to be more independent?” Jamil repeated what you said, although sounding a bit ludicrous. It was night and the body was asleep, letting you and Jamil discuss what will happen in the future.

“Yeah, so that we won’t have to babysit him and we’ll have a lighter load.”

“But it’s a servant’s job to cater to the master’s needs and we have duties—“

“We can’t keep doing stuff for Kalim forever, he has to do things on his own. And since he’s the heir, he should learn how to be responsible. We can’t be there for him forever, there will always be a possibility of us dying and him being by himself. It’s like having a little brother or sister — minus the servant position — you teach them, show them how to be responsible and to take care of themselves, and let them learn from their own mistakes.”

“. . .I guess that’s not a bad idea.”

“Jamil, you’re human and right now a child, you should be able to enjoy some things you like without giving it up for Kalim.”

“. . .Okay, I’m glad you’re here with me now. At Least I have someone with me.”

You smiled in fondness as you ruffled his head, much to his childish indignation. “Happy that I can be of service.”

You were eight years old when you unexpectedly met Leona Kingscholar. Although you didn't know if this was a hidden fact from the game or the universe is going in a different direction, you were quite surprised to have met the young boy at a Spelldrive tournament between NRC and RSA. The Asim family got VIP seats due to their prestige and power and fame, so you had to come along since Jamil was Kalim’s retainer and bodyguard.

Although he hasn’t killed anybody yet.

---

I decided to make a fic of this and yes it has a/b/o dynamics.

next >>

#twisted wonderland x reader #twisted wonderland x jamil viper #jamil viper #a/b/o universe #reader reincarnated into jamil viper and now shares a body with him #gender neutral reader

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blodreina-noumou · 2 months

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for stacked100 day even though we still have to wait some time to see them together... thoughts on Octavia and Diyoza?

Octavia and Diyoza are a huge highlight of the latter half of the series, imo.

One of my favorite tropes that The 100 pulled off rather well is the whole "enemies to friends" things. Octavia and Indra had a similar vibe, but Indra was so obviously a mentor and role model for Octavia.

What's really fun about Octavia and Diyoza is that they meet more or less as equals. Two cunning, cutthroat women leading dangerous, violent groups in a fight over limited resources.

The details of their leadership make it really compelling, too.

Octavia has almost ironclad control over Wonkru, and their loyalty to her is unmatched to just about any other leader in The 100's entire storyline. Obviously we watch that deteriorate as s5 goes on, but it can't be denied that that loyalty is what keeps Octavia in charge for as long as she is.

Diyoza, meanwhile, has a grip over the Eligius prisoners that is far more tenuous and is based on the fact that she led the rebellion on the prison ship. McCreary is battling nonstop to try to take that control away from her, whereas Octavia's enemies are all pretty much external.

And then they both lose it all. They end up on the floor of the Eligius ship together, one of my favorite moments. Even if "One garden, two serpents. Eden never stood a chance," is a little cheesy, it's kind of incredible to have one serpent say that to the other. A moment of camaraderie in all the destruction they just wrought.

Their dynamic in s6 is one of my favorites. Octavia has no hope for the future, feels betrayed and used, and doesn't see the point in being alive anymore. And Diyoza has been there too, and she helps her come back to herself. The way she talks Octavia down by pushing her to the edge - putting a gun to the younger woman's head when she couldn't fight back - only to be surprised and saddened by Octavia's willingness to be killed. Their entire storyline is so rewarding, and I'll admit I became a lot less interested in Octavia's s6 storyline after Diyoza disappears into the Anomaly.

And then in s7, they have their beautiful domestic bliss, raising Hope together. And we got to see how they related to each other in peace. I generally didn't ship them, but I did during this period. Honestly, they all might've been better off if they'd managed to stay on Skyring forever.

What they share with Hope there is really beautiful and sweet, and that makes Diyoza's death even harder, because they only got to live peacefully for a short time. But that's The 100 for you. S7 was disappointing in so many ways, but I think they handled Diyoza's sacrifice really well, and the story is more impactful if she dies.

I wouldn't have complained too much if she made it to the endless beach party though. She was a badass and I think she and Octavia would've made a good couple. And Hope could've been one of the few characters to make it through the series without being an orphan.

Overall - their dynamic is one of the few things I really enjoy about s6 and s7.

#asks #laufire #stephspeaks #the 100 #octavia blake #charmaine diyoza

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wistfulwatcher · 1 month

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@ahauandthesun replied to your post “vague tgotb 1x6 spoilers I was genuinely enjoying...”:

wait i need your reasoning on this because i had the same feeling but wasn’t exactly sure why. this whole episode felt off

��yeah, i have thoughts lol.

ok so first of all, i'm wondering if this episode and the last episode got restructured/rewritten? because the first thing that felt ~off to me was how grace and kimberlyn interacted. like??? grace was invited to her engagement party/wedding last episode and now it's like they barely know each other? while i enjoyed 1x5 i did think they were kind of rushing the friendship between the girls. i was rolling with it because 10 episodes in a season is so little that i figured they were just doing a whole lot of telling not showing with the emerging friendship.

but this episode felt like a full step backwards, with zero reason for it. i really wish the bus breakdown had happened earlier, since the debates were a good way to get the women to talk openly. (but maybe they were trying to use it to sell their point that debates don't change anything? i'm maybe giving this show too much credit lmao)

overall though i was enjoying the episode up until about the last 15 minutes, because wtf happened with grace and the sandwiches? i legitimately thought it was another one of sadie's fantasy sequences because that came out of absolutely nowhere. if it had made even a lick of sense i would have been all over that scene but it was just truly bizarre???

idk overall the ep felt sooooo shallow. i didn't really think this was a groundbreaking female show or anything before this, but it wasn't so bad i couldn't enjoy it until now. it just felt...blah. especially when thought about in retrospect, knowing where they're going with sadie. pregnancy is about the dumbest/most overused/boring(/insulting, because sadie doesn't have to make EVERY short-sighted choice, a career-oriented woman remembering to use protection can coexist with a semi-unethical choice in partner!!) route they could have taken. i was already barely tolerating the loafers storyline because yeah. sure. when he's a plot device to explore double standards he makes sense. i guess.

also, and this is truly the most minor issue with the pregnancy storyline but. she's 8 days late after traveling/working nonstop, trying to uncover a conspiracy/election bombshell, losing the respect of her mentor, and fighting tooth and nail to keep her dream job? you're a week late because you're fucking stressed, sadie. ugh.

overall, just disappointing!!! but oh well

#ahauandthesun #well i thought i was just minorly irritated but it's nice to vent!!#wordles #also wouldn't be me if i didn't point out that this was the first ep written by a man!!!#i think i maybe need a rants tag for this stuff so people can avoid the negativity if they prefer!#ww rants #tgotb spoilers

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blkafro-dyte · 1 year

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My OBX3 Rant

So, it’s been a few days since the season 3 trailer for Outer Banks came out, and I’m irritated and scared for the fate of this show. Netflix is notorious for having a great show turn to crap around the 3rd and 4th season. I fear that Outer Banks will become a hot mess.

Like don’t get me wrong, visually the trailer was really appealing, and some of the storylines were intriguing, but overall I’m concerned for a few reasons:

1. This show is so heterosexual. Like there aren’t even side characters that are apart of the LGBTQ+ community. Like be foreal, a friend group with all straight folks....hmmm just doesn’t seem that realistic. Like, the writers are telling me Cleo is, checks notes, straight? Like sister was all over Sarah in season 2, “Sarah, my girl,” ring any bells?

Also, Kie, definitely doesn’t like men, because when John B kissed her, she immediately was thrown off. Then she gets with Pope, and after having sex with him, she literally said “that didn’t feel like it should’ve, like no fireworks, etc.” I just feel like that’s room for her to open up and explore her sexuality. The whole Kie and Sarah friendship, turned enemies back to friendship, would’ve been so cute if they had a fling their freshmen year, but Sarah didn’t want others to know about her and Kie, so that’s why they ended their friendship in the first place. I just think having Kie being passed around her friend group just pisses me off and the lack of her story line also pisses me off.

Lastly, for this point, I am a JJPope stan, so I want JJ and Pope to be together, they just have so much more chemistry, but even if they don’t get together, I need Kie to be with a girl. This show is just so STRAIGHT, like BFFR.

2. I’m mad they keep bringing folks back from the died, but not Sheriff Peterkin..like if anyone should be brought back it’s her, not Ward. I love that John B is gonna reunite with his dad, and that scene that was shown is gonna be heartbreaking, but I’m mad they one, showed it in the trailer, and two, made that a little predictable. Like I know we saw him at the very end of season 2′s finale, but I thought it was a flashback, I was very wrong.

3. I want Cleo to have a good story line, not just the token Black girl, and I know the writers have Pope and Cleo lined up to get together, and I wouldn’t be upset at that, but I need it to be NATURAL, slow burn if you will. I don’t think Cleo likes boys, like she just doesn’t give me that, and it’d be nice to have her and Pope be a bestie duo. But on the flip side, I do love the black love representation, I just don’t know if the writers will even do that storyline justice.

4. I need all of the Pogues to get rest. Like these folks haven’t showered nor rested for 2 seasons, and then this one looks like it’ll be nonstop. Like Sarah needs to rid herself of her family, and save Wheezie. Justice for Wheezie. Like that scene with Topper, I wanted to vomit. I know it’s most likely a flashback, but I don’t wanna see that. He’s a weirdo and folks keep wanting to give him a redemption arc. JJ needs rest, I wish he’d stayed with the Heywards. I hope we see his anxiety being addressed this season. John B needs a break too, like please let this man rest.

5. Rafe and Ward need to DIE, or get thrown in prison and throw away the key. PERIOD, he doesn’t need a love story, nor a redemption arc.

6. Why are they solving ANOTHER mystery? I know that’s the plot of the show at this point, but they haven’t even gotten the gold or the cross. Like moving onto another mystery...really?

I know this rant may not seem like I’m excited for this season, I am, but I’m scared for the outcome. Also, this shows lack of representation is concerning. The fact that the directors are feeding into the fan service is also telling of what the show can end of being in the future.

But that’s the end of my rant, I’ll just be reading OBX fanfics.

#jjpope #popecleo #outer banks #obx #obx3 #obx 3 trailer #rafe cameron #rant #outer banks rant #sarah cameron #john b #kiara carrera #jj maybank #pope heyward #cleo outer banks

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flightfoot · 10 months

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I haven’t seen the rest of ml season 5 since “Derision”, but I have been seeing the posts and takes about the season finale.

And I am a little worried with Marinette not telling Adrien the truth (and possibly not Chat Noir either). Cause this type of trope has been played out in different media, and most of the time, withholding that type of dangerous info from the person they’re trying to protect, most often backfires. And horribly.

Chances are, Lila/Cerise will most definitely beat her at it and tell Adrien the truth. And knowing her, she will definitely make it worse, and completely twist the narrative to gaslight Adrien into thinking that Marinette was doing it for malicious reasons.

And this can put Adrien in a very vulnerable state where it’s gonna be easy for Lila/Cerise to manipulate him to her liking and to further hurt Marinette.

I've got mixed feelings on this.

On the one hand, it'd mean Lila/Cerise gets to worm her way into hurting both Adrien and Marinette, and potentially manipulating Adrien in ways that'll be particularly horrible for him (especially if she susses out what those wedding rings he's wearing are). Plus if she manages to make him doubt or turn against Marinette in any way, the Adrien salters are gonna scream for his blood... but then again they've been doing that nonstop since season 3 and I've got a substantial number of them blocked by now, so maybe it wouldn't be too bad.

On the other hand, this could actually be kind of good? It'd give a very solid reason for Marinette to reconsider her "lie to/keep secrets from people who deserve to know them in an attempt to not hurt them" approach, and it'd mean that Adrien WOULD learn that Gabriel was Monarch and that he's a Senti (granted, it's at least possible that he was told that, but I kinda doubt it), and he'd get to really react to those revelations in a substantial way, which I'd love to see, especially considering that the main alternative I was thinking of to this storyline is for those secrets to just... be swept under the rug.

#ask #miraculous ladybug #adrien agreste #marinette dupain cheng #lila rossi

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goshdangronpa · 8 months

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In SDR2, Ibuki Mioda bites the dust as a result of Monokuma’s latest diabolical motive, the Despair Disease. This element, and Chapter 3 as a whole, remain controversial in the fandom. I’ve seen quite a few YouTube videos proposing “fixes” for the storyline (TinyLeaf’s thoughtful rewrite comes to mind). Many fans think the whole motive is too nonsensical to be salvaged. I happen to find it interesting, and I’d like to keep it in "I DISAGREE: An Ibuki Mioda SDR2 Protag Swap AU" … with a few radical changes of my own.

Down with the Sickness: Starting the Game with Despair Disease

First, let’s review the basics of the Despair Disease. It’s …

A motive! One of Monokuma’s ways to push ordinarily non-homicidal teenagers into concocting and enacting fiendish murder plots. I’m not sure if I’ll invent any new ones for this AU. The ones currently in SDR2 really compel me. That said, I’m definitely not just copying and pasting them. AUs are for bold rethinking, and I’d like to twist this thing around and freshen things up.

More literally, a communicable illness. While symptoms include fevers and fatigue, the standout side effect is a major reversal of the sufferer’s personality. Some say it turns people into their exact opposite, which seems … a bit simplistic, but it’s a good starting point. It might be most accurate to say that the infected is definitely not acting like themself.

Well … a bit bullshit. I agree with many of the criticisms often leveled at this plot device. The drama of Danganronpa comes from thoroughly fleshed-out characters taking desperate actions based not just on their circumstances, but on who they are and what they value or stand for. A magical personality rewiring doesn’t keep with that. Still, there’s something spicy about characters suddenly becoming different, becoming unpredictable, losing control over themselves …

So yeah, I’m keeping it for this AU. But I’m not keeping Chapter 3 intact. This most contentious of Danganronpa plot points will actually move to the very beginning of the story!

Well, almost. The beats of the beginning will stay the same, with virtually the only differences being that Mikan wakes up Ibuki (who foams at the mouth and faints from the island reveal) and they meet everyone at the beach (besides Hajime, who passed out cold). This story still needs those precious few days before things start really going downhill. Time for characters to discuss their options over communal breakfasts, explore their surroundings, and grapple with the reality of their new nightmare lives. Time for them to get to know each other … but not much time at all.

One morning, a few of them are acting out. Granted, they all still think of each other as a little strange, but this erratic behavior seems different. It’s not long before Mikan Tsumiki notices that those classmates’ foreheads are running hot, and Monokuma finally confirms that the first motive is a contagious illness. He’s stingy with details, asserting that the Ultimate Nurse and all these other Hope’s Peak smarties can figure out the details. What he will reveal is that it’ll keep spreading until another life ends through less natural causes.

What a world of difference this rearrangement of events would make! Consider: by Chapter 3, the characters (and the player) already know each other well enough to recognize exactly what’s happening with the Despair Disease. They know to be weirded out by Akane’s nonstop weeping, Nagito’s baseless conspiracy theories, and Ibuki’s mindless obedience. At this early point, (almost) no one will know what to think of their infected classmates’ behavior. Is it that hysteria is a symptom, showing differently in each person? Is it just a normal psychological reaction to an abnormal situation, exacerbated by high body temperature? Is it … something else?

That’s what Mikan and her brave volunteers, including our plucky protag, will spend Chapter 1 investigating. One change cascades into an entirely fresh chapter, and those changes in turn will affect the entire narrative.

To be clear, I’m not doing any of this to “fix” SDR2 Chapter 3. It’s not like I think I’m fixing SDR2 by recasting another character as the main! This is all a creative exercise, a writer’s playtime between the boring day job and more serious personal projects. With that said, I wonder if Despair Disease haters might get something out of what comes from this decision. I’ll share more of this story next time.

PREV: The Major Side Characters

NEXT: The AU Narrative's Chaotic First Three Mornings

#I DISAGREE: An Ibuki Mioda SDR2 Protag Swap AU #danganronpa #sdr2 #goodbye despair #ibuki mioda #despair disease

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loveabledirtbag · 9 months

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1.04 - Dogs

i think this episode is one of the best of the series, and one of the most important, so i’m VERY excited to crack in!

i’ve always seen this episode as sort of a mid-season finale. a lot of the ongoing storylines from the first episode are sort of wrapped up here; as in the slow trek of trying to get the team at the beef onboard with the new system. marcus was won over in the first episode, but ebra seemed to be chill with it in episode two yet he never got a real storyline or moment of acceptance (yet another point of how ebra is underutilized!), sweeps, angel, and manny all put on the apron but have even less screen time showing their transition into the new system, but the donning of the uniform blue apron is symbolic of their allegiance to the new. all that’s left by episode 4 is tina and richie. but it’s tina, who is undoubtedly the heart of the episode, that matters most.

the intro of the episode almost right off the bat tells us that this episode is going to be different. it’s calm, yes, but episode three started calm but with an air of existentialism and tension over carmy’s clear feelings of anxiety. but this opens with a fun little song by david byrn, donuts being made, and marcus watching in all. it’s all cute, and sweet and happy. something we really haven’t seen before. this episode is different.

following marcus staring at the donuts with childlike love, we fade to richie trying to put a tshirt on a blow up hotdog! this episode is so tonally different. even though carmy and richie literally get into a physical fight over the hot dog, it’s dripping with pure comedy. comedy without the edge or the groan, or the bite that the rest of the episodes have had. there’s no anxiety in this episode yet. we see a physical fight break out and we smile! not to mention mid-fight tina comes out of the beef to toss a bag of garbage, lazily sees them fighting and calmly says “morning.” just to show that this isn’t all that surprising to her! this is comedy gold. and all of it elevated by richie falling onto the hot dog, popping it, and undeterred he says he’s going to grab the other one from the basement! it’s a perfect scene. an absolutely perfect scene.

this episode is the reason the bear is not just really good, but as damn near perfection as any show i’ve ever seen. because it knows when to take the foot off the gas. we had three really tense, really intense, really hard and gritty episodes. sure, the next two after the pilot were less neck-break speed, nonstop intense, but they both had a lot of intense moments that were hard to watch. one more episode with it would have been too much. it would have been over the top, and shown that while the show can do intensity, that’s ALL it could do. episode four proves they can do heart, nostalgia, and character growth just as deftly. and it slows down enough to allow us to catch our breath. like a pallet cleanser, allowing us to move onto the next course without having our pallets blown out by the previous dishes

“you have no idea what kind of administrative correspondence i have to get done today…you might shit on my system, but i like to get back to my cohorts in a timely fashion.” “name me a cohort, name me one cohort.” “timothy, but i don’t have time for this” - i fucking love it. just so funny. genius writing. also mention of a system. richie’s/mikey’s system.

i remember the first time watching this episode, when marcus asks syd to try his chocolate cake, and syd says it’s great thinking to myself “huh. is there something between marcus and syd?”

“i answer to jeff. the system.” more system talk from tina. and this is interesting, because sue mentions “jeff”, who we all know is “chef” carmy. so she’s talking about carmy’s system, more or less. BUT carmy’s system is that syd is managing the kitchen, effectively tina’s boss, and so if syd says something tina is supposed to do it. but tina’s not doing it. so we know it’s not REALLY carmy’s system she’s following. she’s trying to stuff richie’s system into carmy’s system and it’s not working.

god, i remember absolutely hating tina because her ways of getting back and annoying carmy and syd cut through me for some reason. now i love her, but the last three episodes she made me so mad for some reason. like when she whistles as syd gets stuck doing onions, or when she faux looks shocked at syd and says “no!” as syd is trying to relate to tina about being a woman in the kitchen. the fact that the first time i watched this in the back of my mind i was like “someone needs to fucking knock tina down a peg, or like send her home for the day until she can fucking stop being such a dick”, and then in twenty minutes i ended saying “tina is amazing and i’m crying and i would do anything for her happiness.” that’s how good this show, and this episode is

“yo, why are you on the kennedy?” “chill the fuck out, cicero lives in naperville.” “you gotta get on the fuckin’ eden” i know everyone thinks LA has a monopoly on being obsessed about roads, but i truly believe it’s universal. i’ve seen some people shit on this scene as some sort of chicago glory-porn showcasing the writers and producers “really know chicago”, and that’s not it at all in my mind. dig into wilmette, or naperville and you’ll learn about just what demographic cicero is in. but also, carmy forgot where cicero lives, and richie did not. even though carmy is “real” family, and richie is not. the shows a deeper understanding of carmy’s distance from his own family, and richie’s deep connection to a family that is not his.

the fight between cicero and richie when seen through the lens of richie and cicero in the episode set five years previously is pretty interesting. a lot happens in five years.

“carmen, is that you? i thought you killed yourself?” “no, sir. that was my brother.” and then mr. szorski just wordlessly walking away, speaks VOLUMES. carmy was gone for a long time, and carmy didn’t have a big personality like mikey did. so to learn that the fun and boisterous mikey is dead and the withdrawn and odd carmy is alive, what more is there for an old chicagoan midwestern man to do? “eh, i’m done with this conversation” and just leaves.

richie having a bottle of xanax with his name on it means something. it’s an overlooked detail, but it means at least in some capacity richie has seen a medical professional and gotten a prescription. the bottle has his name on it. he suffers from anxiety and dread, like carmy, but he’s taking medication for it.

the chekhov’s gun of richie popping a pill out of the bottle over the jug of ectocooler juice, both in sharp focus as carmy watched a bit concerned is a nice touch

one of the greatest back in forth in tv history “where’s the box with ketchup in it?” “i didn’t bring ketchup” “why don’t you bring ketchup?” “what kind of asshole is gonna put ketchup on a hot dog?” “a child, richie.” “a child asshole.” “you’re a child asshole”. 🤌🤌🤌 it’s so FUNNY, but it’s also so CHICAGO.

that followed up by richie’s insult about carmy prepping a bunch of fruit, only to learn it’s ectocooler and saying it’s actually kind of dope, to a one-liner of “rest in peace, harold.” MY GOD, that’s a good line. it’s just all so funny, even while moving plot forward and helping us understand a bit about the history of these characters more. the writing of this show is just top tier.

“one bite of a donut brings much joy, two bites brings sadness.” wow, ebra. where did you hear that line? and why are you saying it to marcus as he’s trying to be inspired by donuts? marcus is going “this could probably be my life’s work” and ebra’s like “yeah, but two bites of a donut brings sadness.” i love it so much. here, too, we see the birth of the “marcus donut” storyline that will dominate much of the coming episodes.

CHESTER! god i love chester. another humorous introduction to help the levity of this episode. the fact that it’s established right away that chester is a fixture in the kitchen as he talks to tina and fist bumps ebra. that’s so fitting. a kitchen is a wild place and rando’s are far too often just popping in.

but also the amount of work chester puts into helping marcus. his job is so small; marcus just wants color swatches just to be inspired for donut colors and flavors. it’s a near impossibly small job, because the color of the donut is also hugely dominated by whatever flavor you’re gonna use for the donut, so the color comes after the chosen flavor. so, to be inspired by the different colors is a small, secondary part of the process. but chester stopped whatever job he had “designing all of it”, before a meeting, to give marcus his roommate a book of colors, but even more so, that marcus says he highlighted some specific colors for marcus because they were “dope as fuck!”. my god, chester’s a good friend!

i also remember the first time i watched this thinking “there seems to be something between marcus and chester…after there was something with marcus and sydney” and i was like “maybe marcus is gay? maybe marcus is bi? maybe marcus is pan? maybe marcus just had chemistry with everyone and that’s a future storyline? maybe the actor who plays marcus is just really charismatic and it comes off as romantic interest?” just the desire to know if marcus was going to have a subplot of romanxe with someone and if his chemistry and seeming romantic inklings with TWO characters in this episode was in my head, an intentional subplot forming, or just because the actor is so likeable as a person.

“donuts are deceptively hard, and the beef is not exactly the most stocked-“ “i want it to be perfect. like that plum carmy was telling us about.” OOOOOOH, just the subtlety of that exchange. syd isn’t saying no, because she has no reason to, but she’s hesitant. but marcus is already in such an obsessive mood that without talking to anyone he’s drawing and designing donuts, and having his roommate drop by pantone colors in a booklet. syd says “be careful” and he doesn’t hear but instead says “i have to make it perfect.” that’s an exchange that is going to be echoed, expanded on, and dived into a few times in the next few episodes with marcus, focused around his obsession with perfecting a donut

the quick sort of transitional scene that is easy to ignore in an episode as lyrically and emotionally packed, is this quick scene of syd going through the beef and checking in with everyone. it shows that in fairly quick order, carmy’s system as headed by syd is actually working. everyone is in the blue aprons, everyone is calm. it’s one of the first scenes of people working in the beef that we’ve ever seen where things seem to be going okay without people screaming (it should be noted that carmy and richie happen to be gone, and that might be part of it), but we run through syd talking to marcus and immediately check in with angel and manny, and then ebra passes through (sweeps is missing, but sometimes a show has to save money on how many reoccurring characters are in a scene), and syd is even comfortable being strict with fak who is trying to mooch without putting in any work. we’re seeing that syd is a competent manager, and the system is having a positive effect on everyone. sydney smiles as ebra tells her she’s having a positive effect on richie (again, just SLIGHT romantic vibes from ebra saying it, and syd’s smile. i’m not saying it IS romantic, but i’m not-not saying it either), and then we see tina in the background as syd smiles. tina is NOT in the blue apron. tina is also NOT doing the potato’s like she’s supposed to. they give each other a look of disgust and move on. the plot is so clear in a scene that is maybe 20 seconds.

if the short shot of richie looking like he’s disassociating from reality at a kids birthday party he has to throw because his best friend screwed the whole shop over, as a half-deflated cartoon smiling hot dog with a taped on “the beef” tshirt is standing over his shoulder that he insisted be brought and he tried so hard in vain to put a tshirt on as it symbolizes the overwhelming realization that his life has officially reached rock bottom and he has no one to blame by himself is not taught in film and cinematography classes i will be furious

the same song playing over marcus obsessing over donuts, richie disassociating, and carmy searching for ketchup and then being swarmed by family and family friends (but family friends who explicitly aren’t at the berzatto christmas five years ago, it should be noted) means something. “help me rhonda”. richie needs help, marcus needs help (which he gets from fak feeling out donuts, but more importantly he’ll learn he needs help from carmy and sydney about balancing his donuts and his day to day duties), and carmy needs help escaping his family. which he doesn’t get from cicero who sees the swarm, stops in his tracks and immediately walks back into the other room. but it turns out cicero also needs help, and can’t escape, because his son is complaining about his party being ruined and cicero calls out for his wife because he’s stuck at the party. it all flows together, with mixes of heartbreak and comedy, but never outbalanced with the beach boys calling out for help, while their music sounds so fine.

the quick cuts of carmy being overwhelmed by family, as he continually just asks “ketchup?” “ketchup?” is so good. he just wants to get through the day, so his job. not have to deal with family shit. both for good and for his own unhealthy working habits. but no one is even paying attention to him as they overwhelm him with questions

“so you work in a restaurant, right?” “yes” “what’s it like to be a fucking loser, huh!?” is….the clunky, weird, biting kind of joke that can kind of clash with the slick writing of the bear that we’re used to. it’s just kinda of a “what the fuck does that even mean…?” kind of line that might sound like the writers just kind of phoned it in to get the point across that carmy’s family doesn’t get what he did and what he’s trying to do. BUT it’s actually one of the most realistic lines of the series, because we all have that family member like uncle frank who says something to us under the guise of a joke and it’s so clunky, and overwhelmingly mean that we have to be like “…what the fuck? why would you even say that?” like the kind of joke that DOESN’T come for a writer because it’s so jarring and clunky and off. so the fact that it did come from a writer is even better

but it also just so poignantly highlights the schools of thought on cooking, especially with older and newer generations. chefs before the 80’s were often exclusively thought of as working class poor. you could be at the best restaurant and the greatest chef in the world, but you were lumped in with the help more often and you were paid beans for your work. we now have celebrity chefs and endless magazines, tv shows, and (now) a lot of fictional content about what a kitchen actually looks like. we have schools that are seen as prestigious and chefs we treat as rock stars. but that doesn’t mean that 99% of chefs and cooks aren’t still working class poor in italian beef sandwich shops, or bbq joints, or diners across the us. if carmy was a rock star, most chefs are people playing an out of tune guitar on youtube and gaining 50 views. so his family doesn’t get it.

which is made even better, and even more poignant with pete’s cut in. once again, almost everything pete does and says is right and good, and yet it comes across as terrible and we hate him for it. pete comes in talking about food & wine magazine, and eater. prestigious places who recognized carmy. carmy knows, much like how he knew when he was serving his sandwich to the staff in episode one, that he’s talented and people idolize him for it, and that what he does is leagues ahead of anything the people he’s talking to could even comprehend, but that doesn’t make him better. he cringes at pete both because of the trauma of his cooking accolades, but also because he knows pete isn’t helping his conversation with his family, but is actively making it worse.

have you noticed the age range of these kids at this party? cicero’s son, the birthday boy, seems like he’s maybe 12-14 (obviously kids, AND the actors who play them, differ in ages and how old they look WILDLY) but there looks like there’s a kid who could be driving, and there looks like there are toddlers. but cicero’s son looks like the age where having that many diversely aged kids would be a drag. like, early childhood, the kids party is more for the parents and so the parents bring all their kids and it’s more like a family get together, with older and younger kids. but once you reach an age where you are more aware of your birthday, and you have a desire for your party, they usually get smaller and more intentional; just a party with your friends, or a larger scale party with kids in your grade at school. so it’s interesting that this kid is having the full blown family get together birthday party. maybe it’s one of many, maybe his actual friends will stay later and they’ll have the friends only kind of party. who knows? but it’s interesting.

i love that even in the midst of cicero and richie’s long-standing feud, they come together to trash talk pete “what a narc”. if that’s not family, what is?

tina looking so overwhelmed while she’s just mad-dashing trying to get this recipe down, only to have syd be like “hey…maybe do it right?” is so good. tina is forcing her system forward and it’s just not working.

i really don’t want to be mean, especially with how beautifully shot marcuses cake making scene is. but his cake looks a little mid? is it just me? like; the scenes are beautifully shot, and it’s calm, and marcus looks so serene. but than his cake looks a little dry. and the frosting looks kinda tough, and also dry. like no moisture, and not smooth. that can’t be a mistake on the shows part, right? like they’re professional chefs and bakers? they gotta know what a good cake looks like. especially with the cake we see later on in the series which looks perfect. i have to believe they’re showing that marcus is still learning.

cicero telling a story that we’re only hearing halfway through, as richie and carmy are openly weeping with tears is such a nice touch. this is family. carmy can distance himself and try to keep himself numb, but family is family. and the fact that the joy is immediately sucked out of the scene the moment pete walks in, is so spot on. the actor who plays pete is really subtly genius. because he sells you on how good of a person he is, while making us groan with every word he says.

even as he tries to build carmy up. talking about how proud of carmy he is. it’s so sweet, and it’s so nice, and yet there’s still that edge of “you’re embarrassing yourself, pete.” emboldened by the fact that pete thinks the blowup hotdog with a taped on tshirt is hilarious

i would love to know HOW richie dropped his whole bottle of xanax into the pitcher of ectocooler. the top had to be open only for a second while carmy was refilling it, right? and yet somehow richie dropped the whole thing in without noticing, and every kid in the place (and pete) drank from it, and no one noticed? but still, the impracticality of the joke doesn’t discredit how funny it is. it just works. with cicero’s “hmm…..i kinda dig it” upon being told what happened. this episode is just pure gold!

tina marching her ruined dish to the sinks, angrily yelling “behind” and tossing the pot in, eliciting a “hey! come on!” from angel as she gets in their way is really poignant, because her system is now actively out of sync with the beef’s. she interrupts manny and angel, she can’t get this dish down. tina, who is the heart of this shop, is pissing people off, and not in the flow. which is even more prominent in that she comes back from dumping her dish to see that syd immediately had replaced the pot with her own. syd could do what tina is doing, and subtly saying “i’m asking you to do this, but if you can’t i can just do it. i don’t need you. i want you here.” isn’t lost on me. yes, it’s communicated by sydney saying she doesn’t have time to fuck around, but it’s tough love and an encouragement to push forward and do better. sydney can’t fuck around, so tina either needs to shape up, or ship out. but syd is also inviting tina to stay. “i did this for you, try again.” and after tina makes the dish right, she says “damn”, because syd’s dish is good. syd was right, and made something tina couldn’t make on her own. and she realizes it.

“you ever miss him?” “i didn’t really know him well enough to miss him.” “you?” “sometimes. we were so close in age we were more like friends than family”. which is interesting. there are some signs that the dad may be dead, but there’s more hints (in my opinion) that there was a hard break at some point, and no one has seen him in years. but, it’s also odd because we’re not sure how cicero is family to carmy’s dad. he’s called uncle jimmy, and he implies to be family with carmy’s dad, which by traditional family ties would make cicero brothers with carmy’s dad. except his name is cicero, and carmy’s last name is berzatto. so, they have to be family in some other way. but cicero is (hopefully) not related to carmy’s mom, because in the flashback episode he is a little weirdly flirtatious with her in a toxic way that you could be with your brothers or family members wife (or ex wife), but you definitely shouldn’t be with a blood relative. so cicero could be a half brother, and that explains the different name. it would also explain why they were so close in age that they had the same life experiences at the same time, as they grew up together. or cicero could be an “uncle” like richie is a “cousin”, or cicero could be a distant relative who is close enough to the family rhat it’s just easier to say “uncle” because “dads cousin” or “great uncle” or whatever true relationship they have isn’t as easy as just saying “uncle jimmy”

when was the last time you talked to him?” “like 20 years ago.” to me implies the dad is still alive. there’s just no talk of the funeral, or proof that he was alive and is now dead. the past tense is only about the dad being alive 20 years ago. so, nothing conclusive.

i love the connection that carmy’s dad fell into being a restauranteur. that with donna being a painstaking cook in the kitchen making extravagant dishes for family shows why mikey took ownership of the beef, and why carmy went to be a classically trained chef. the love of food runs in them deep

the nice little detail of saying “really stuck your mom with that place. don’t you hate being in there 24 hours a day?” in episode two we had gotten a hint of cicero being familiar with the beef, and maybe hinting at a deeper knowledge than it just being his nephews sandwich shop. and here we learn that the beef was carmy and mikey’s fathers place. he stuck their mom with it, and mikey took it over.

another reference to carmy having a twisted love of his own pain: “i’m in there for five minutes and i start thinking about bad shit” “that’s probably why i like it so much”.

i love the dream cicero talks about in this scene. because it adds to the dreamscape atmosphere this season embraces. but i have to believe the baby in the dream is carmy, right? cicero and carmy’s dad are flying down the road (of life), and can’t get control of the car, carmy’s dad refuses to put on a seatbelt, and suddenly there’s a kid in the road and cicero jams on the breaks and doesn’t hit the kid, but carmy’s dad goes flying through the windshield but never lands. i definitely think it’s symbolic of cicero’s feelings towards carmy’s dad: he’s falling perpetually, always about to crash, but never actually did. he never really flew, but his hair raising, harm inducing free fall never actually crashed. carmy’s dad was always able to pull off having to deal with the consequences of life, things never came crashing down, he never hit the pavement. but he was clearly never rich, or could take it easy. it feels like a hustler who is always a step from getting his legs broken, but is managing to make a living. we know that cicero and carmy’s dad grew up together, which means probably poorer, and working class. and now cicero is rich, even if there’s some sketchy underside to his livelihood. so cicero stopped the car, his seatbelt was on, he “made it”. but carmy’s dad didn’t make it, he just hasn’t hit the ground yet by some miracle. but what caused the car to crash? a kid in the road. and we know that carmy was young enough when his dad left or died to not even really know him, or miss him. carmy is probably what caused his dad to leave, or at least feels like he is. but the fact that carmy’s dad hasn’t hit the ground yet tells me he’s probably still alive

that split second moment of tina making the potato’s, and taste testing them and in her mind we see her think. somethings not right. and then she throws a pinch of seasoning in there and smiles liking that taste more. it’s so good. because no matter what system tina is in, we see from that little dash of her own seasoning, that she’s a chef no matter what. she knows when something tastes off, or needs a little something to add more flavor.

and then when tina throws the pot down at syd and says “get it over. tell me it’s shitty”, we know she’s saying “tell me i’m shitty”. we realize that tina has been so defensive and angry because she sees all of this as a threat. a threat to her home, her identity, her livelihood. tina thinks she’s a shitty line cook at a shitty italian beef joint. and carmy and sydney are going to raise the standards so high that she gets squeezed out of her job. tina has self respect issues, and doubts her worth. but then syd tries the potatoes that tina made entirely herself and says “that’s great, thank you chef.” and suddenly the word “chef” isn’t attached to a critique, it’s not a sign of other people’s skill in comparison to her skill. she did good, BECAUSE she is a chef. and when tina turns around and says “thank you, chef” with tears in her eyes. UGH, i fucking melted. that’s when i decided i would die, or kill, for tina. i love tina. i love this show!!!!!!!

the final cut to the cake; with marcus zesting an orange over in honor of the donut he saw earlier that day, looks a lot nicer all done up. but my mind still goes to…is the cake still the dryish looking one we saw earlier? and the frosting looks kind of hard. idk. i’m sure it tastes better than anything i’ve made, but it looks just kinda…dry? and maybe old? like it had been sitting around for a while before they filmed?

“it’s amazing, he’s just sleeping there like a baby and i want to beat the ever living crap out of him.” ugh. it’s so good. i love how easy it is to hate on pete. and how odd it is that it’s so fitting with family. pete just is that member of the family that married in and doesn’t fit.

“we all get cake because we’re best friends” oh fak. never change. you sweet, kind, stupid, baby angel.

the point heard around the world between carmy and marcus. i love it and how it comes up multiple times

that sigh from tina as the episode ends. just that sigh of “i’m exhausted, but i did it.” tina grew, tina changed, tina belongs, tina can just…exhale for the first time in a long time. she’s not gonna be left behind, she has value, she belongs. it’s so beautiful

AND THATS EPISODE FOUR, the unofficial mid season finale. i episode five we move to a new seasonal arc and a whole lot of good content!

Season Two

#the bear #the bear fx #the bear hulu #carmy berzatto #carmen berzatto #the bear tv #the bear season 1 spoilers #the bear review #tina the bear #marcus the bear #the bear richie #sydney the bear #the bear series #carmy the bear #live blogging #review

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booasaur · 1 year

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Harlem spoilers

I loved the finale SO MUCH omg like Quinn deciding to take time for herself is so unexpected of a storyline but so actually good for her? Like she has been dating nonstop since the pilot so I think a season 3 storyline where she’s by herself figuring herself out is so good.

Then Tye. OMG what a TWIST. Aimee being Zoe’s Mom???? OOH I’m excited

Not sure how I feel about Angie getting proposed because it is fast but also it does kinda work for a Angie tbh and we don’t know how much time has passed really they haven’t told us

Then Camille her finally finally buckling down and focusing in her career when she’s been all over the place career wise since season 1?? And Pruitt maybe deciding to fight for her to stay?????? My god.

THEN. THEN THE CLIFFHANGER OMG THE CLIFFHANGER. It’s gotta be Angie right? Her storyline is the only one that would work with a pregnancy! Quinn can’t find herself if she’s strapped to a baby daddy (also I think we would’ve heard if Grace’s husband was becoming a recurring? Like I know season 3 isn’t confirmed yet but I just feel like that would be something we would’ve heard about if they were planning on making him more than a cameo and they would’ve put more effort into Quinn and Keith’s relationship if that was the case) Then Camille this whole season has been about her and Ian and her eggs I don’t see them rehashing that. Then Tye obvi can’t be pregnant. So it’s GOTTA be Angie I feel.

Thank you for the spoiler warning!

I already spoke about Quinn in the previous ask and lol, the Aimee and Zoe thing is such a mess. I wonder if they'll try to have Aimee and Tye make a go of it but it'll be too weird in the ennd. The Angie proposal definitely feels early but I suppose there's no reason to not go ahead with an engagement if they're both ready, and they seem like they are.

Very happy to see Camille winning at work and making a decision about no kids and not feeling guilted because Ian does want them and she's cost him so much already, which, to be clear, she didn't make him do any of this, but she feels responsible all the same.

Now, the cliffhanger. Both you and the previous anon implied that it can't be Quinn because it'd disrupt her finding herself storyline but I don't know if the writers would choose storylines based on least disruption, in fact, I kind of think they'd go for max. :x

It's true that it'd fit so well with Angie's storyline, but that's why I wonder if it might not be her. Or if it is her, then Mike's not the father. There's no fun in things going smoothly, as we've seen with all the other romances. I doubt it's Tye, of course, though I suppose one can never rule that out, but we'll put it in the least likely category for now.

The thing is, unless this is the last season, a baby doesn't really fit the show's vibe, though I can see them being supportive through the season during a pregnancy and rushing to the hospital at the end of the season to all be there for the baby being born. But then how would another season go? Bringing a baby to their lunches or constantly looking for a babysitter? So I wonder if possibly they might go with an abortion storyline, in which case I could see that being Camille's very tough arc, knowing how much Ian wants kids and the improbability of getting another chance at a pregnancy vying with her career and simply being unsure about it all. It'd be another reason to keep Ian in the show, since Tyler Lepley seems a regular along with the main four ladies.

On the other hand, the show may not go with abortion and instead highlight the dangers to expecting Black parents through pregnancy, delivery, and after, in the American healthcare system. In that case, I could see it being Quinn after all. And the show might decide that it's not going to be pigeonholed as just friends drinking and hanging out all the time and slowly work in children.

The other thing to keep in mind is that while Angie's s3 would be filled with the engagement/wedding, Tye with this romantic mess, Camille possibly with her career (and maybe Jameson??), learning to be at peace with yourself is more a passive thing. So, if they're trying to plan s3 storylines, that might be how Quinn's goes.

On the other hand, that seems brutal for her, to go from depression to, well, an unwanted pregnancy, to put it brutally, to then what, an exhausted mother in s4? Plus, like you said, the thing with Keith was so weak, like a little placeholder relationship that only existed to not be significant.

Honestly, I've just spilled out all my thoughts and really have no idea which way they're leaning. It all comes down to the stories they want to tell.

#replies #femslash related stuff #sent on 20230225 #Anonymous #5 #harlem on prime #harlem spoilers #harlem 2x08

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femalebookworm · 8 months

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Another 1001 shorty. It was simple. It had resistance. It had falling in love hard and fast (a shorty), and one page of actual action for the main storyline. I don’t know why it bothers me. Maybe because I want the end of Opus and knowing everything about it, and these romances get in the way?!? Maybe I am truly over the genre, but I want closure.

Jehan is a prince, and he has a duty — an old one and the Order — he’s called back home to take part on a mating bond to assure peace between prides of sorts.

Sera, his counterpart, is over there doing gods work while meddling in corruption; but with a pure heart.

These two end up in sheets but on their own terms, and yeah, danger was afoot! However, while they are over there falling in love at fast and furious pace, his brother and her sister are competing for who is the fastest couple alive. Their news shows up on the villa Jehan and Sera are staying and their deal is somewhat broken but nah? They continue and end up mated, the end. Yup, I too were blinking nonstop like that meme.

It was okay, cause they did bring some Opus danger to the desert to compensate, but very little to my liking. I’ll now seriously be awaiting my money to get the new volumes while lowering down (six feet under) my expecting more resistance, cause I think the couples in these books are too fast to fall victim of their bodies desires. Like, gimme the angst and struggle that actually takes a while — these couples remind me too much of me with chocolate and I kinda hate it.

And voila, we got to the root of my dislike. This isn’t a Midnight Breed problem, this is a book problem all across the board. Life ain’t that easy.

Anyway, no pictures, you know the drill. Off to another, super different type of book that I hope I don’t rip my eyes out. Yes, already turned a few pages and eye-rolled — and I was told it was good. So far, I find it to be a word salad. Just wait for that review, if I still have brain cells left afterwards.

#Stroke of Midnight #the midnight breed series #Lara Adrian #book review #romance #bookworm #urban fantasy #fantasy & paranormal #review #fantasy & romance #adult romance

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noramoons · 1 year

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yeah hair colors change so fast you blink and it’s new (and more often than not looks great) and you just have to recover from the whiplash LOL and yeah I didn’t start stanning txt till last year but after p much going through their whole discography and really getting invested I can say that they absolutely did not disappoint with this cb (it’s actually my first cb after stanning them too btw ^^ I started stanning after gbgb came out but I’d casually liked them since way back. it’s a story lol)

and yeah ffxiv has one of the best stories I’ve ever experienced in video games I’m so glad I took my time with it. it doesn’t take 6 months to complete and I’m sure ppl have done speedruns I just decided to go slow. It does have side content you can unlock but you can always go back and open it, no need to start another run. the game has technically been out for almost or about 10 years and had four expansions which are basically full games/sequels so it’s no surprise it was a long journey but it was an emotional ride and one of the best experiences I’ve ever had so it was worth every second. honestly one of the best written stories imo too everything was amazing and so well-written just *chef’s kiss* fr beck 🤌🏼🤌🏼😩😩

no this is so true they rlly will change that hair color NONSTOP i rlly am sometimes concerned for their roots 😭 i’m sure they’re treating their hair right but sometimes it does look Very crispy agfndndh

and AWWW omg this is such a good first txt cb to start with !!! i knew you said you’d kinda been casually around since blue hour i think ?? which is abt when i got into them too hehe but it’s absolutely never too late to start stanning, they’re such a fun group and i rlly do think this album was one of their best. it was just inexplicably Them like idk how to say it 😫 their sound and their whole concept was just so txt (and i’m just also always a sucker for anything peter pan related tbh)

and aaaa okay okay i see !! that’s good that you were able to go thru it and really enjoy the story, that says a lot abt the quality that you were willing to devote time to it for that! i didn’t realize it had been out for 10 years tho?? :O i knew there were several games but i wasn’t sure if they were all direct sequels or spin-offs or what ahaha. didn��t they also remake ffvii? that’s the only thing i kind of know about bc i remember a few of my friends irl talking about it LOL but what was that about 👁️👁️

but i’m glad it’s been such a good payoff for the time you’ve put into it !! i love when something is so well written that it almost feels like a reward in a way hehe. and ik you have absolutely immaculate taste izzy so if you say the storyline is good then i KNOW it’s good 😎

#beck answers 💌#decembermoonskz

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xeulousluv · 3 years

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My Girl

Part one of the mini series My Girl

AN: Fair warning, this story takes place in 2020, but for the sake of the storyline I have made to where Covid never happened. Now I am aware that this topic is a huge one, which is why I want to remind all of you to be safe out there!

Pairing: Harry Styles x Reader

Genre: Fluff and some angst

Word Count: 4.2k

Screams of joy quickly filled the room as soon as the pastor said the infamous words, you may now kiss the bride. There they were, two kids from the outskirts of Manhattan, saying their I do’s and finalising their committed love to each other.

The beginning of the day was messy and rushed, fear laced in the air as no one knew how the day would play out. Leave it up to Daniel to be late to his own wedding, forty-five minutes to be exact, so instead of him waiting down at the end of the aisle for Zoey to walk down, she was the one waiting on him.

You had met Zoey your freshman year of college when you two first became roommates. During that time you thought she was too chirpy and loud, but soon come to realise that she would become a huge factor in your life, six years later.

Daniel came into the picture three years ago, they had met in the most cliche way possible, at a rollerskating rink. She didn’t want to spend her twenty-first birthday in the typical bar scene, Zoey wasn’t like that, she quite literally despised alcohol.

The moment they said I do, tears slowly formed at the bridges of your eyes. Part of it was because of how happy you are for her, how ecstatic for her to start this new chapter in her life. But the other part, the more selfish one, wanted her all to yourself. You wanted it to be you, her, and Cadence for the rest of your lives. However, Zoey did inform you that no matter what it was you and her against the world, you just added a few more souls to it.

Later that night when everyone was sitting around the room eating their food, you found it the perfect time to say your speech. The same speech you rewrote ten different times because it just wasn’t good enough. So, like in the movies, you stood up with a spoon in one hand and your glass of sparkling cyder in the other, and slowly clanked the two together gathering everyone’s undivided attention.

“Hello everyone.” As all eyes turned your way, you had to clear your throat a little with how intimidating this is. They never tell you how nerve-racking it is to give a speech in the movies. “As some of you may know, my name is Y/N Y/L/N, the bridesmaid and unfortunately one of Zoey’s only friends.” Laughs erupted through the room, considering everyone knew how anti-social Zoey actually is.

“I just wanted to start off by saying first and foremost, a huge thank you to everyone who came and made this day as magical and mesmerising for our lovely couple over here. Ever since the day Zoey and Danny met, it’s been a nonstop rollercoaster of emotions, but in the best way possible. I still remember the time Zoey told me she thought she was in love with him, it was just two days after our lives changed drastically. She came up to me and was like, “I never knew I could hold this much love for someone, but here I am. I think I love Danny and that scares the shit out of me.”

“She was full of nerves for a whole week after that. But one day she came home smiling like an idiot claiming that he loved her too, the rest is history. Zoe, as much as I tease you about your quote unquote, school girl crush, I couldn’t possibly explain how happy I am for you and Daniel. I just hope he treats you the way you treat literally everyone in your life. And these past two and a half years have been a huge adjustment for me, and I just want to thank the both of you for never letting me go through it alone. I love you guys. To Zoey and Daniel!”

Cheers broke out and champagne glasses echoed, Zoey stood up and pulled you into a huge bear hug, explaining over and over how much you mean to her. By this point in the night, it would’ve been the second time you cried, had you not felt the small tug at the bottom of your dress.

There on the chair beside you sat the most beautiful girl in the room, Cadence Y/L/N. She was buckled onto a small booster seat that was sat on the chair, a slight frown taking over her face as there was no more food on her plate.

You had Cadence two and a half years ago, when you were twenty-two, hence the sentence in your speech. Her father abandoned you the second he found out about the pregnancy, typical college boys. They aren’t ready to become fathers so instead they leave, but you were never going to give up the chance to give your baby the life they deserved. Maybe it wasn’t supposed to happen this way, but if you could go back and do it all over again, you would in a heartbeat. However, you would do a couple things totally differently.

“Mommy, I want up.” She had pouted out, with only being nearly three, she really knew how to speak. As if you could ever say no to her and her little pouts, you unbuckled her booster and lifted her on your hip. Zoey smiled as she gave Cadence a soft kiss to the head before announcing that she was going to talk to some family members. “What’s up, babe? How was your dinner?”

Cadence smiled, holding up her thumbs in the cutest way possible. That is until she whispered in your ear, “Mommy I have to go potty.” Cadence was never shy, but she did hate having her business out in public, and even though she isn’t fully potty trained yet, you love the fact that she’s telling you when she needs to go. Because you know that there will come a day that she won’t need to depend on you anymore, she will have her own life. That’s a thought you never wanted to wrap your head around.

Having made your way to the bathroom, you helped Cadence hold her dress up as she did her business. She really was the cutest flower girl you have ever seen, plus Zoey’s mom did an outstanding job with putting flowers in her long and blonde braided hair. A true princess, she was.

“Okay mommy, I’m done. Can we wash the yuckies away now?” Her doe-like eyes looked up at you, and sometimes you forget that she is only two, and the fact that she’s yours. All yours. No one else’s. “Yes baby, let’s pull up your big girl undies real quick, okay?” And having expected it to come, your daughter replied with, “I’m a big girl now mommy!”

She still couldn’t properly pronounce her R’s yet, but the daycare she’s in is working on it. Turning the water to a lukewarm temperature, you lifted Cadence up to the sink where she would get her soap and wash the yuckies away.

When she was done washing her hands, you set her down and both made your way back out to the party hand in hand. Everyone was dancing now, Zoey was with a few of her aunts and Daniel was probably out on the balcony having a smoke. “Hey Liz, can you watch Cady for a few minutes? I need a breather.”

Elizabeth Walters, the mother of now, Zoey Green. Liz loved both you and Cadence, basically adopting you the second you set foot into her luxurious house. You knew Zoey came from a long line of money, but seeing it so up close and personal felt like a dream.

“Of course, love. You know I could never say no to this cute little face.” Liz squished the cheeks of your daughter before grabbing her hand and leading them both away from you. Undoubtedly going towards the dessert table where Cadence has been eyeing all night.

As soon as Cady was in the safe hands of Liz, you made your way out to the balcony where low and behold, Daniel was sitting and admiring the view. “Hey you, shouldn’t you be with your wife?” You spoke up, Daniel was surely intimidated by you at first, having been his girlfriend's best friend, he wanted your approval. Though after a few months you both warmed up to each other and are now as close as ever. “Yeah, just needed a bit of a break is all.”

Daniel led his right hand over to you, where he was silently asking if you wanted a hit from his cigarette, which you gratefully obliged. “Everything okay?” You looked at him, eyeing the side of his face while the smoke you just inhaled settled it’s way down your throat.

“I just can’t believe I’m married, Lace I’m married!” Lace was a nickname he came up with the day he found you dancing around your apartment in nothing but your lace bra and underwear. To be fair, he was looking for Zoey and you happened to be cleaning the house while singing to Avril Lavinge’s, Skater Boi.

“It’s crazy, isn’t it? I mean one minute you’re planning your whole future then you blink once and it turns out you are now living it.” Daniel laughed, giving him back his cigarette, you placed your arms on the balcony edge. “I love her so fucking much that my heart physically hurts, I just don’t want to mess it all up. I mean what if, in five years she doesn’t want me anymore? I will be torn.”

“Danny, you know you can’t get into your head about this kind of stuff. Zoey loves you, I’ve known it since the day we met. The way she would talk about you, her eyes would light up and a huge smile would appear on her face. She adores you, man. And I know I don’t say it much, but I am so grateful for all you do. You brought my Zoey back, the carefree and adventurous Zoey I knew before her dad died. I love you, Zoey loves you, and Cadence definitely loves you. Seriously dude, what did you do to her to get her to love you more than me?”

It was nights like these where you would feel closest to Daniel, nights where you fully take in how much he has done for you and your best friend. Daniel put out the cigarette in his hand and turned your way, “I’m just cooler than you, remember? I got a shirt that says cool uncle for a reason.” And like nothing happened before, the both of you were back to joking and laughing. “Alright, now if you don’t mind me, I have got a wife to get back to.”

You sent him a smile before following him back inside to go find your girl.

When you finally found her, she was dancing with Liz and her boyfriend Arttie, some evidence of chocolate on the corner of her mouth. “Hey, sorry about that. I can take her now.” You picked Cadence up and sat her on your hip, kissing all over her face before she let out a mommy stop!

Liz was adoringly looking at the interaction, clearly not understanding why you thought you were failing as a mother. “Nonsense love, she was an angel as always. You love hanging out with grandma Liz, don’t ya little one?” Her attention now turned to the two year old who gave her a huge smile and a nod that matches said smile. “I just feel bad for putting her off on you for something as stupid this. I usually don’t do it, but I needed to speak to Daniel anyway.”

Your mom was never really in your life when it came to moving out and onto college. You grew up in a small and messed up town in Pennsylvania, your mother was an alcoholic and your father was, well he’s a story for another day. “Y/n, I can assure you that everything is fine, I love having you guys around and if that means watching your daughter while you go have a smoke, then so be it.”

Instead of saying anything, you leaned in and gave Liz a hug that Cadence found her way into, still on your hip. The position was awkward but the gesture itself was one full of love. “Mommy, it’s our song! Dance with me please?”

And as if your heart couldn’t get anymore full when We Fell in Love in October came on, it swarmed with warmth at Cadence’s words. “Of course, baby. You are my girl aren't you?” The giggle Cadence let out was one of the utmost amazing sounds you have ever heard, you could listen to it on repeat for the rest of your life. “Yes mommy, your girl.”

With that, you led yourself and Cadence to the dance floor and started dancing around, not having a care in the world if you looked ridiculous. Right now, at this moment, it was you and your daughter. That is all you needed. Smiles took over your faces, and only widened when you saw a camera on your dancing figures.

“Smile for the camera, baby!” And she did, you both looked at the camera, waves, and smiled all while still dancing to the beat of the moment.

When the music slowed to an end, you and Cadence continued dancing for a few more songs before she announced that she was tired. So again, you picked her up and let her slowly fall asleep on your chest. Even though Cadence wouldn’t remember this day when she grows up, you will always remember every second of it.

“You look like you could use a drink, but that little munch there kind of prevents that doesn’t it?” It had been an hour and you were sitting at your table with a sleeping baby attached to you. When the voice was heard behind you, you kind of struggled to turn your head but the man made it easier when he moved to stand in front of you.

“I would if I drank. It’s not really my thing, ya know?” He was attractive, short brown hair and emerald green eyes, but was he really your type? Probably not, you went for guys with longer hair, but you couldn’t deny the natural beauty of him. “‘S understandable love, this seat taken? Do you mind if I sit?”

His accent was more than endearing, entrancing even, though he sounded fairly familiar. “No of course not, it’s all yours. I’m Y/n, I would shake your hand but I’m a little occupied.” You introduced yourself, laughing out as you pointed at the sleeping baby in your arms. He laughed along with you, and had you had a drink in your mouth, it would be all over the front of you at the sound. It was perfect.

“’M Harry. She’s a peaceful sleeper, that one. Are you just watching her?” This was the moment that you would say she is actually your daughter and he would run for the hills. So you gave a fake smile and a sigh, “Something like that, she’s mine.”

As you expected, his eyes widened in shock. You look so young? But he wasn’t about to judge you. “Seriously? That’s awesome, I hope you don’t take this as offensive, but I thought she was just your little sister.” However, that was not expected, him to stay, but you had time. “You flatter me, Harry. I had her young, a little younger than I would’ve hoped, but now that I have, I’m over the moon. She’s the most perfect baby. Sorry I’m rambling.” You stopped yourself before things got too weird.

Instead you opted to play with Cadence’s hair that was now out of the brain and drained of the flowers. You loved playing with her hair, in fact you loved all physical contact with her, cuddling at night was a definite must. “Never apologize for talking about the things you love. Or I guess in this case, the people you love. I find it charming that you talk about her, it goes to show how much you love her.”

When you looked back up at Harry you found his eyes already on yours, a soft smile playing at his face. And even though you hadn’t meant to do it, a slight heat rose to your cheeks. No one, more precisely no guy, has ever said that to you. “I do. I love her so much.”

“You know, I heard your speech earlier, it was really sweet. I’m guessing you and Zoey are close then?” Cadence starts rolling around on your chest before getting comfortable again this time her head layed on your left shoulder, facing the side of your neck, her soft breaths fanning over you. “Closer than ever, really. She was there for me when I wasn’t even there for myself. Could never repay her. What about you, who are you here for?”

“Daniel, we’ve been mates since we were sixteen almost. Met on a show I was filming.” A show? That’s a change for people you usually talk to. “So you’re an actor then?”

A smirk played at his lips, his fingers playing with his bottom lip. “Something like that, I’m a singer, but I have filmed a movie or two.” He spoke, replying back what you said to him. To say it shocked you was the understatement of the year. You hadn’t even been to an actual concert in your life, let alone met someone famous. Wait, was he famous?

“That’s crazy, anything I would know?” Genuinely curious, you eye his movements. He now had his left arm on the table while the right was lifted towards his left hand and played with his rings. You hadn’t even seen the rings that were splayed on almost every finger, you had to say, it was incredibly hot. A bonus, his nails were painted a dark shade of blue.

He must’ve noticed your staring because a laugh soon erupted from his throat and had another smirk. “I don’t know, have you heard of White Eskimo?” His question was simple, though you still looked as confused as a kite flying in the air. You didn’t want to offend him, but you also knew you couldn’t lie to him. “No, I can’t say I have. It’s a band?”

“Not anymore, thank god. I am so embarrassed looking back on old videos, my voice was so small and my young, naive self had no clue what the world had in store for me. One Direction, have you heard of them?” Harry’s smirk was replaced by actual curiosity, the name sounded familiar but you’d never listened to any of their music. “You see, the look on your face says that you do. But that’s also not a band anymore, we all went solo. I wouldn’t know if you knew any of my music. And not to be cocky but I should throw it out there that I have appeared on the radio more times than I can count.”

The night was just getting weirder by the second, why was someone who has been on the radio talking to you? Out of all the girls in this room, he chose the one with a baby. You love Cadence more than you love yourself, you would take her over any other love for the rest of your life, it’s just weird when talking to people. “I’ve heard of the band, a few times I think. But I have never listened to your music.”

Harry lifted his hand to rest over his heart, “You’ve wounded me.” You didn’t know why, but you ended up letting out a laugh that was probably louder than it should have been. “Okay, so maybe you are a bit cocky. But that doesn’t explain how you and Daniel met on this show.”

“To be fair, Y/n, you never asked how we met, all you asked was who I was here for. But since you just have to know, his brother was on the show as well. It’s called The X-Factor, it’s a singing competition show. Anyways, his brother went before me and I guess he could sense my nerves because he came up to me and told me that I would do great. His brother didn’t end up making it, I actually think he still kind of resents me.”

His brother, Austin Green, wasn’t here tonight. His wife was in the hospital having their baby, you had only met him twice. And each time you had met him, he wasn’t the kindest person, especially since you had a baby so young and the father wasn’t around. “He resents me too, it’s not just you. Having a baby out of wedlock is not the ideal situation in his book. Hell, it’s not the ideal situation in anyone's book.”

A look of pity flashed across his face. You’ve gotten used to that look, it doesn’t get easier each time it gets given to you, and it’ll only weigh more and more on your daughter as she gets older. Oh look, Cadence’s mom is a whore who got pregnant after having sex with a douchebag, clearly they weren’t good enough for him since he had no will to stick around.

“Now that’s not true. It was not a look of pity, it was one of sorrow. The fact that someone would criticise you because you had a baby out of wedlock, but now I can see the story goes deeper than that. And I certainly don’t think you are a whore for having sex with some ‘douchebag’ whom you may have loved.” Harry stated, leaning his head downward a little do get a better look into your eyes. How in the hell did you just say all of that out loud? The look in his eyes did in fact show sorrow, but not for the reasons you had thought.

Maybe he’s just making all of this stuff up? He’s probably just saying all of this because he feels sorry for you, or maybe he wants something more with you. Something that doesn’t involve a baby, or clothes for that matter.

“I should go. I have to get my daughter home, she’s gonna wake up with cramps because of how her neck is laying. It was lovely to meet you Harry, really.” You stood up, grabbing the small backpack you had sitting on the back of the chair. It had a spare change of clothes for Cadence in case she had an accident, your phone and your wallet, and a few dolls for Cady to play with if she got bored.

“Wait, Y/n, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable, opposite of that actually.” His hand grabbed the wrist that wasn’t holding Cadence up. His face was sincere, though it did not make things better. “Harry, it’s okay, you don’t have to pretend to want to get to know me. Guys like you never do, I don’t hold you against it.”

“Guys like me? Y/n, you can’t put words in my mouth like that. You don’t know me, and if you did, I’m sure you wouldn’t be saying that. I don’t care if you’re a single mum at a young age. I don’t care if you are barely surviving with bills piling up. I don’t care if your apartment is a mess because you have a child and it is hard to keep a clean platform. I don’t care, okay? I walked up to you because you were alone and I figured you would like the company.”

He interrupted you before you could properly finish, his words were barely registering and his hand was still clasped around your wrist. However, you pulled away and placed your arm under your daughter protectively, also to ease the slight pain of holding her in one arm. “So you admit it. You only talked to me because you felt bad for me. Look I’m not some lonely girl who needs saving, I have a child to think about and she will always come first.”

Maybe you were overreacting, he hadn’t even said anything about Cadence. “What? I did not come over to you because I felt bad. Why can’t you just believe me when I say that I genuinely wanted to talk to you.”

Harry was getting frustrated, it was pretty clear. His voice was raising the slightest bit, the rasp in his voice slowly disappearing. “Because guys don’t talk to me for no good reason. They always want something, so make this easier for both of us and spit it out already.”

By now, the bickering had caused Cady to stir in your arms. Your eyes still on Harry as you slowly started to lull her back to sleep, bouncing a little side to side. “I just wanted to get to know you better. Believe it or not, not all guys are looking for something.” And with that Harry turned around and walked away. Leaving you to sigh and make your way over to Zoey and Daniel to bid your goodbyes.

His words replaying in your head, Believe it or not, not all guys are looking for something. What did that even mean?

Part Two

-----

Hello everyone, welcome to my new mini series, My Girl, I have no clue how long it'll actually be but I have some ideas. I really hope you like it, if people are even reading this. If not lets pretend this never happened. I am still getting used to uploading on here so I am going to try and figure out how to make a masterlist to stay organised, and how to do requests for whenever you guys have ideas. I may not be the best writer out there, but it’s just a thing I enjoy doing. If you are here, thank you for reading and I hope you come back.

#harry styles #harry styles angst #harry styles x y/n #harry styles x reader #solo harry #harry styles fanfiction #harry styles one shot #harry styles blurb #harry styles fluff #angst fanfic #angst fanfiction #fanfiction #slow burn #one direction #one direction fanfiction #one direction one shots

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mieohmy · 3 years

Text

𝖢𝗈𝗆𝖿𝗈𝗋𝗍 𝟣𝟢𝟣 | 𝖫𝖾𝖾 𝖩𝖾𝗇𝗈

PAIRING: lee jeno x reader

GENRE: angst, fluff, humor, comfort, established relationship au, college au, this rly is just a self indulgent fic kjasdfk

WC: 2.1k

NOTES: slight argument/fighting ?? , cursing

SUMMARY: jeno wants your attention, your comforting presence, your love- he simply wants you.

for the bday boy that i treasure sm! happy birthday to puppy jeno <333

ღ

The phone next to you lies untouched, and practically has been for days- or has it been a week already? I mean, it wasn’t your fault that upcoming finals had been taking you to the depths of hell, and you had no choice but to lock yourself at home to study for a week on end.

Which brings you to day 7? 8? of being holed up in your room all day, memorizing a bazillion tiny printed words and trying to cram as much information as possible in that overworked brain of yours. Getting about 4-5 hours of sleep a day, you couldn’t remember anymore- or even care to remember. Not to mention the added stress that came along with being any normal college student. Wasn’t life just wonderful?

You feel bad for everyone that has tried to contact you over this stressful period in your life (since you completely turned your phone off to eliminate all distractions), but the urge to stop studying completely and just check up on the real world and all its happenings grows stronger. You breathe in -out, constantly chanting ‘self-control’ over and over again in your head. Then your eyes slowly open, and you slap yourself one last time as if to say ‘get it together' before diving back into the books.

Just two more days. Two more days and you can finish and not have to stress about finals until results come out.

At this point, you were surviving off of coffee, tea, random stolen snacks that your boyfriend would bring over from his dorm.

Damn, when’s the last time you had a proper meal? Monday?

And then you frown. What day even is it today? You glance at your calendar and-

Goodness grief, it’s Sunday already.

You almost have a midlife crisis over wasting basically a week doing nothing but sitting at your desk and looking at words, but then again at this point- you’re just over it and want to be done as soon as possible.

But soon, a weird feeling arises after you recall today’s date- like you were forgetting something. You place a hand over your forehead. Was there something important today?

And as if the universe read your mind, the doorbell rings.

A giant wave of confusion washes over you. Was someone supposed to come over today?

-and you just completely wiped it from your mind?

You’re still running through your memories as you walk to the door. No, it's not Chae since she has finals too...

Opening it, you’re not at all expecting who was behind it.

“Jeno-?”

He blinks back at your wide eyes, expression turning concerned, and you rub your temples in exasperation and defeat.

“Oh, did we have a date today or something? I’m so sorry- I totally forgot.”

His eyebrows furrow. “No, I was just supposed to come over to hang out with you....”

“It’s been so long since we last talked, baby. You haven’t responded to any of my texts. What’s going on?” He promptly adds, staring intently at you.

You let out a sigh, and jeno notices your tense shoulders and dark under-eye circles. “I thought you knew. Finals are coming up so I’ve been stuck at home cramming for about a week now actually.”

His frown deepens. “I did know. And still, y/n..” he says in a warning tone.

You know what his voice implies, you’ve heard it plenty of times at this point, but right now you don’t have to energy to listen to his nagging. “ I know, I know. Just- come in, I guess.....”

To be completely honest, you wanted to send jeno back home- there was still a lot more information left to cover and you obviously weren’t in your best condition, but he was the one who actually remembered your ‘date’ and drove to your place, so you would feel even worse making him go all the way back to his dorm.

Jeno easily follows you in, biting the inside of his cheek to hold back any comments while examining your place even though barely anything has changed since he last visited- mostly because there was nothing to change when you were in your room all day.

You walk to the kitchen, getting your boyfriend some water while yawning. Meanwhile, your mind is drifting away, thinking about what topics are left that you have to go over later. “What are we even doing today?”

Jeno plops on your couch, arms behind his head. “I don’t know. A movie?”

You hide your grimace, immediately thinking of how much time would be wasted watching one, or possibly even more if jeno was feeling it. In the one to two hours of a movie, you could be done with chapter two and three-

“Y/n??”

Your head snaps up. “Yes?”

“Are you gonna come over here or just stand there in the kitchen all day?” he teases.

You shake your head to clear the fog and join jeno on the couch. Scrolling through the options, you automatically snuggle up next to him, eyes blearily watching the moving tv screen.

He decides on this one animated film, and you’re too drained to pay attention so you simply nod and let the movie begin. But even though you try your best to focus on the storyline and what’s currently going on, your mind keeps wandering off to other, more boring things- your studies, obviously.

The number of chapters you covered, the slight of chapters you have left, how long you would have to stay up to finish going through your planned amount of information -all the stressful thoughts swirling in your head, and it only exhausts you more.

You let out a sigh, and jeno turns to you. “Are you okay? You’ve been sighing nonstop since we started the movie.”

You clear your throat, biting back a yawn. “Oh- yeah, sorry. I won’t do it anymore.”

Your boyfriend stiffens but doesn’t say anything, attention returning to the flashing screen in front of him.

You did try. You really did. But your eyelids keep drifting shut and your head keeps slowly lolling forward and snapping back up -it’s not until your forehead accidentally knocks against jeno’s chest that he finally speaks up again.

“Y/n. You need to take a break and get some sleep. Now.” His tone is sharp and commanding.

You snap your eyes back open, vision blurry. “No- it’s fine. I’m good, let’s keep watching.”

The immediate switch in the air is scary, jeno swiftly reaching for the remote and pausing the movie to look at you dead straight in the eyes before setting it back down with a loud, clattering noise. “You need to rest. I can tell from how tired you look, and I know you’ve been studying for so long, so why is it that hard to just relax for a little?”

You groan, distress breaking through. “I can’t, okay? You already understand how stressful school is and how important my upcoming tests are. I know you’re just trying to be kind and thoughtful but-“

“But what?” He cuts you off, the frustration he’s been hiding for a while finally revealing itself. “Taking a rest from burning your brain out isn’t going to kill you, y/n.”

Your hands at your side clench and unclench, a wave of emotions overcoming you. “I know that. But I can’t afford to have a break now.” Everything suddenly feels overwhelming, and your voice comes out strained and uncontrolled.

“I’m almost there, jeno. It’s so close, and if I stop now, I’ll feel like a failure.”

He laughs a short and echoing bark. “How do you think I feel? I was trying to brush everything aside and act like it was all fine, but it’s certainly not when you’re like this.”

You falter.

Jeno gets up, making direct eye contact with you even though his body is trembling and his voice is shaky.

“I spent the past week just lying in bed and worrying about you- if you were eating okay and getting enough sleep. I was constantly texting you reminders to take care of yourself, only to find out from your friend that you turned your phone completely off. Do you know how shitty of a person I was feeling? I didn’t want to be a distraction to you because I know how much you care about your grades, but it’s killing me, y/n. I want to be there for you, but instead, I end up feeling like the worst boyfriend in the world.”

He shudders before continuing,

“And then I come here, brushing off all my worries since I was super excited to finally be with you after so long, and then I have to see you in such a bad condition. Barely taking care of yourself, barely even surviving on your own just so you can pass your exams that I know you’ll already do well on no matter what. As your boyfriend who wants to help and be here for you, do you know how much my heart hurts?”

He finishes, but not before wiping away the frustrated tears that appeared in his angry rant.

It takes one beat -two beats, before you immediately spring up, rushing towards jeno and throwing your arms around him.

He accepts it, burying his face into your shoulder and wrapping his arms tightly around your waist.

The guilt courses through your body, and you understand. The consequences of your actions hit you, hard, and you know you deserve it all. Jeno just wants to know that you’re here. You’re here with him.

“I’m really sorry,” you murmur into his hair, “I’m really, really sorry, jeno.”

You hate the fact that you can still feel the slight wetness of his tears soaking through your-technically his- shirt. You pull back, looking straight into his eyes to make sure he knows you’re being genuine.

“I promise to pay more attention to myself, and I promise I won’t ever let it happen again. I won’t shut you out anymore... and you can come over to take care of me whenever you want, okay?”

Jeno slowly nods, and you softly wipe away the corners of his red eyes of any wetness.

He pulls you closer to him again, inhaling your scent one more time, and you finally let yourself go.

After about a minute of just enjoying each other’s warm embrace - one that you feel like you haven’t felt in so long- you allow yourself to smile and pull back just enough to place a kiss on his cheek.

“Was my baby just lonely and missed me too much?” you sing in a soft voice. He lets out a disgruntled noise in response, shaking his head against your body.

But you both know what the answer is.

“C’mon, let’s go to bed.” You tug his arm easily to your room, putting off your studies, at least for today.

“You’re really gonna take a break this time?” Jeno asks, eyeing you carefully.

You grin. “Yes? Besides, I know you’re always down for cuddles.”

You drag him to the bed, taking his arms and wrapping them around your body as exhaustion quickly fills you.

You fight yourself to stay awake as long as you can to enjoy jeno’s presence, but he notices and hugs you even closer if possible, whispering softly, “Go to sleep, baby. I’ll be here when you wake up.”

And before you finally drift off, you sleepily murmur, “I love you, jeno. Like, a lot.”

Even after you fall asleep in his embrace, he stares down at you, softly kissing your forehead.

I love you too.

bonus bc i adore jeno too much :

“Jeno- for the last time, you’re not a bad boyfriend.”

“I know.... but-“

You shut him up with a quick kiss.

“You’re the sweetest.”

Another kiss.

“Funniest.”

Peck.

“Handsomest.”

His ever so growing smile freezes. Jeno looks at you, a surprisingly solemn look on his face.

You raise an eyebrow, confused.

“......even more than Nam joo hyuk?”

Ah. He had to go for the favorite actor.

You swallow, battling an intense internal war before begrudgingly nodding. “Okayyy...fine. You are.”

He crosses his arms. “I’m what?”

You roll your eyes, whining. “I already said it!”

Jeno shakes his head firmly. “Say the whole thing.”

You take a deep breath in, internally apologizing to your beloved actor. “......you, lee -verymuchanannoyingbaby- jeno, are more handsome than Nam joo hyuk.” Your sentence is finished swiftly in one breath, words slurring together. It actually pains you to say that. But it’s good enough for your boyfriend.

Jeno delights in the squeal you let out when he picks you up in his arms to spin you around.

“Fuck yeah- take that, nam joo hyuk!”

ღ

a/n: anyways im going to go hide away and cry over jeno now ^^

#cznnet #kpopscape #nct #nct dream #jeno #nct jeno #jeno x reader #lee jeno x reader #jeno scenarios #jeno imagines #nct dream x reader #nct dream smut #nct dream imagines #nct dream scenarios #nct dream fluff #lee jeno imagines #jeno fluff

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