#the whole thing about her mom. it's like having my own memories played back to me
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Only The Best For You
Kimi Raikkonen x Fem!Reader
Warnings: dad's best friend!kimi, reader is 20/21 - reader is old enough to make her own decisions, your dad isn't pleased with the gift, one mention of alcohol and one mention of death, sexual tension, kinda power imbalance, kimi gives into the intrusive thoughts, nipple play, fingering for like 0.2 seconds, one use of the word 'daddy' in a sexual way, penetrative sex (p in v), gagging, finger sucking, 'whore' used in a sexual/degrading term.
Word Count: 2,400
Author's Note: for all my dad best friend freaks and the kimi whores, this one's for you <3 -- also ignore that it's gucci in the pic but it's something different in the fic loool I couldn't find a different pic I liked.
merry smutmas series
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Kimi spends the holidays with his old friends. He doesn’t forget you; bringing you exactly what you had been wishing for and you make sure to thank him.. properly.
An old L/N family tradition.
Since you were a child, your parents and grandparents allowed you to open one gift from them on Christmas eve, letting you enjoy the magic of Christmas a few hours early.
You were grown up now, in college and your grandparents had sadly passed on but your parents kept the tradition going. You had come home for Christmas break and it was Christmas Eve. Your parents have just finished dinner and you have moved to the living room.
It was yourself, your parents and your dad's best friend, Kimi. You had known Kimi your whole life practically but he was always away racing so you never saw much of him until lately, now that he's officially retired - for good this time.
"Shall we open gifts?" Your father asks, walking into the living room. He passed a glass of what looks like whiskey to Kimi, who was next to you, before sitting beside your mother.
She looks over at her husband. "Honey, isn't she too grown for that?"
Your father rolls his eyes, shaking his head. "It's a family tradition, now hush. Go pick a present."
Your mum picks first, picking one from your father that just so happened to be the new perfume she wanted. Your father was next and he picked out one from you. It's a story book he used to read to you as a kid, you had written all of your favourite memories of the two of you inside of it. You made him cry, both you and Kimi laughing about that.
"Go ahead, sweetheart." Your father nods towards the tree, you move from the couch to the floor, kneeling in front of the tree to pick out a gift.
A gift sticks out to you; red wrapping paper with little elves of it and your name written in cursive across the front of it. You pick it up, shaking it a bit to see what was in it.
It felt hard, as if it was a box. You looked towards your parents, "is it from you guys?"
Your dad looks towards your mom; she took care of all of the holiday shopping. The woman shakes her head, "it's not from us, sweetie."
The gift on your lap when you glance over your shoulder at Kimi. He gives you a small smile, so small you almost miss it.
He nods towards the gift, waiting for you to open it. You rip the wrapping paper very carefully, revealing the red box underneath; the gold lettering was cursive - Cartier.
Your jaw was already dropping, looking back at the man. "You didn't," you say and he nods again, waiting for you to open the box to see what was inside.
"Kimi, what did you do?" Your mother asks, looking over at your father. He was never one for brands or jewellery, he didn't realize that buying something there automatically was an expensive purchase.
Lifting the cover carefully, the velvet black fabric inside the box held a white gold chain, blue sapphires set along the entire thing.
If your jaw wasn't already on the floor, it would be now. "Kimi!" You turned to face the man, setting the box on the couch carefully. "You did not!"
"I did," he nods. He's always been a man of very few words; more of an action rather than words type of guy.
"What is it?" Your father asks and you hand the red box over to him for him to see.
He shows your mother as he holds the box, he doesn't realize that he's holding a little over €40,000 in his hands at the moment. "Oh Kimi, it's beautiful." Your mother gushes, handing it back over to you.
You were still on the floor, admiring the necklace in the box. "Well, turn around." Kimi says and you do, sitting just between his legs.
He reaches over to take the box from you and carefully takes the chain out of its box before you lift your hair. Kimi leans forwards and you can feel his fingers brush against your skin and his breath on your shoulders when he loops it around your neck and hooks the clasp.
"It looks gorgeous on you, darling." Your mom says, smiling at you.
Your phone's in one hand and your other hand gently touches the chain, straightening it as you admired how it looked on you. "Kimi, this is too much. It's so expensive." You whisper to him and he shrugs.
"How expensive are we talking?" Your father finally speaks, looking over at his friend.
Kimi answers nonchalantly; "Like.. €40,000."
Your father instantly sits up, his jaw hanging open. "What?! Kimi, are you out of your mind?"
"Please," he looks over at his friend in disapproval. His hand rests on your shoulder, his thumb passing over your soft skin. "She's a good girl, she deserves it."
You can't help but shift a bit when he calls you a good girl, the words hitting you right where you shouldn't. It was wrong, he was your father's friend and you were.. well, you were attracted to him. You couldn't deny it; Kimi was an attractive man and despite his lack of words, he was very charming.
"Y/n, say thank you. You can't not say it when he's spent so much." Your father tells you, and you turn around to face Kimi.
"Thank you, Kimi," you smiled at him, sitting on your knees when you reached up to give the man a hug. His arms wrapped around you, his warm hand pressed to your back. "You're welcome, angel."
Another nickname that hits you in all the wrong places.
--
As the night goes on, your parents head up for bed as do you. Kimi was the last one to bed from your understanding and as the house grew quiet, you tossed and turned, unable to sleep.
You find yourself sat on your bed, pjs on - a tank top and a pair of shorts with a €40,000 chain around your neck.
It was nearing 3am, the witching hours as your mum says. You find yourself getting up and heading downstairs. The initial thought was to go to the kitchen and get a glass of water but you got side tracked when you see a light coming from Kimi's room.
You knock, peeking around the space left between the door frame and the actual door. "Come in," he waves to you and you step in, shutting the doors behind you. The TV was on, a rerun of some show you couldn't quite place was on.
"What are you doing up?" He asks, glancing at his phone to check the time. "Do you know how late it is?"
"I couldn't sleep," you tell him, looking over at the TV. "Can I join you?"
He shrugs, nodding towards the empty space next to him. You quietly make your way over, sitting next to him on the bed. Kimi don't miss the way your shorts hike up when you crawl over to the empty spot; it's so wrong for him to be looking at you like that but can you blame the man? You were gorgeous and you were in his bed after all.
The two of you sit quietly, watching as the show rolls on into another episode. You unconsciously play with the chain, shifting it back and forth slowly.
Kimi looks over at you, smiling to himself; you were the picture of beauty.
"You're staring," you mumble, glancing at him. He smiles, like actually smiles. "You're beautiful."
Your cheeks are red, you hope that the light coming from the tv isn't bright enough for him to realize that just yet.
"It looks good on you," he says, "like it was made for you."
"Blue has always been my favourite colour." You smiled, glancing down at the chain. "Did you pick it yourself?"
He nods, "I saw it and thought of you, I figured you'd like it."
"I do, very much." You look over at him, Kimi smiles at you and your hand shifts from your thigh to his, rubbing along it softly. Kimi's brows furrow ever so slightly. He doesn't say anything, hoping that you'd stop if he ignores it.
You were persistent.
Your hand travels higher, about to rub over the ever so evident bulge in his shorts but Kimi catches your hand, holding your wrist. "We can't, y/n."
"Why not?"
"It's wrong," he whispers, glancing at the door - you weren't sure if he wanted you to leave or if he was catching to see if it was locked. You wiggle your hand from his grasp, Kimi lets out a small breath of relief; see, the man was stupid enough to think you were stopping.
You didn't stop. Instead, you got on his lap, straddling him with your hands on his shoulders. Kimi's hand rests on your lower back as he looks at you.
"Let me thank you properly," you whisper, lips ghosting over his.
Kimi reaches up, his lips pressed to yours but he's yet to kiss you. "You don't have too."
"I want to.. I want you," you mumbled, finally kissing the man. Your hand cupping his jaw, Kimi's hand slips under the tank top you had on and slides up your back to undo your bra but finds you don't have one on.
Kimi pushes the straps of your tank top down off your shoulders. You sat comfortably on his lap, letting him have his way with you and the man wanted one thing. He leans forward, arms wrapped around you as his lips wrap around your nipple.
“Kimi, fuck- please.” You mumble, your hand tangled in his blonde hair, tugging on it. As such as you loved the attention, you needed him.
He glances up at you, watching as your eyes fluttered shut. He groans when you pull on his hair a little harder but what's a little pain when he's making you feel good?
It was heavy, heated.
His hands on your body, pulling you over and onto him. You were perched on his lap, Kimi's hands on your ass when he kissed you again.
Not a word is spoken between the two of you and what little clothes you had on was gathered in a pile on the floor when he rolls you two over. You were flat on your back with Kimi settled between your legs.
“Please,” your hand rested on his jaw, “daddy, please.”
The pet name makes his cock twitch; it's sinful, so sinful in so many ways but he couldn't care less. You drove him mad.
His hand slips between the two of you, his fingers rubbing slow circles on your clit. Your hips lift, wanting more from him.
Kimi’s hand wandered a little lower, a finger pushed in slowly. He can feel how wet you are, wrapped around his finger and he smiles.
He moves his finger slowly, curling it. He takes pleasure in watching you, seeing how your face twists and how your body reacts to his touch.
"Please," you whimpered, "don't make me wait."
Kimi can't bring himself to say no to you.
He sits, pushing his shorts down and you get the hint, getting on top of him. Your hands grip on his shoulders, balancing yourself. Your knees on either side of his lap, Kimi's hand reaches under you to help you, the tip of his cock brushing against your clit, making your hip shift forward a bit. His free hand on your hip as you sink down onto him, his name tumbling from your lips.
You take a moment to get used to the feeling, your eyes fluttering shut as he rubs along your lower back, leaning into you to kiss down your neck.
You rock your hips forward and Kimi's head drops back, his eyes now closed. “Fuck, you’re perfect.” His hand pats your hip, “made just for me.” He tells you, your lips now on his neck - a trail of marks and sloppy kisses being left along his neck.
He pulls one of your legs up forward, pulling you down further. “Fuck,” you breathe, his thrusts faster and harder. How you wished you could scream his name right now. Kimi's hand drops between the two of you, rubbing your clit.
Your head falls back, manicured nails digging into his pale skin when he hits the spot he was looking for. He watches as you bounce on his lap, the sapphires around your neck bouncing in rhythm with you. His fingers that were previous on your clit now shoved into your mouth to muffle the sounds tumbling from your lips.
Your brows furrowed, an excited look on your face despite it all. You can feel his cock twitch in you, his lips next to your ear when he leans in.
"You've got to be quiet, angel. Wouldn't want them to catch you being a whore for me, hm?
You mumble something along an okay, your hips bucking, telling him you want more. Your tongue laps around his fingers, Kimi watches as you suck on them. There's a wicked smile on his face, his hips lifting to meet you halfway.
He lets you take over, setting the pace and using him for your own pleasure. Kimi leans forward as his lips wrap around your nipple. His tongue lapped over your nipple, biting on it softy; just enough to get you to arch your back, pushing into him.
“Come on darling,” he mumbles against your skin, now kissing up to your collarbone. Kimi's hand behind your neck to pull you down for a kiss. “Want you to cum for me.”
His arms wrap around you when you drop against him, your face buried against his shoulder, biting down to muffle the sounds. “Good girl,” he hums, rubbing your back.
Your heart beats out of your chest as you catch your breath. Kimi smiles, kissing along your shoulder. "Feel good?" He asks and you mumble something, your head resting on his shoulder.
"I take it I should spoil you more often, hm?" He chuckles, making you smile when you sit up. Kimi straightens your necklace, kissing your chin.
You shake your head and smile. "Don't have to spoil me for me to do that."
Kimi smiles at you, giving you a kiss. "Merry Christmas, y/n."
"Merry Christmas, Kimi."
--
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#kimi raikkonen#kimi raikkonen smut#kimi raikkonen x reader#f1 x y/n#f1 x you#f1 x reader#f1 smut#merry smutmas xoxo
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My dad died yesterday, he was 63
I would like to share a little about him and our story if anyone wants to read, this is not a happy story
My parents divorced when I was three and I went to live with my mom so I saw my dad's life in snapshots, once a week at first and then once a year when he moved abroad and I would spend the summers with him. Every time I would catch up with him he would have a different partner or apartment.
My time with him was always fun, he was laid back, adventurous and open, he would let me do all kinds of crazy stuff while my mom was the strict one. He was a genius to me, he taught me how to program my own games when I was nine, he would make me take computers and appliances apart and reassemble them to teach me how they worked, he made me love science, the outdoors and travelling. He was great at teaching and cooking and driving. He worked on tours for famous musicians as a sound tech, he made 3D films for museums and theme parks when it was all very new, he was a photographer, a programmer, electrician, mechanic, artist and could play many instruments and write poetry!!
The first crack between us was when there was a huge split between my mom's side of the family and his over money and a lot of ugly truths stared coming to light. I realized that when it came to money he was willing to put himself before me and the fights between him and my mom were awful. But in the end once the dust settled we both pretended it never happened.
One weekend I went to visit him and realized his current girlfriend would stick around at last and she had a daughter almost my age!! I now had a little sister and I loved it.
A year later the country fell apart and he fled abroad along with them and even though I missed them I would visit for months at a time every year. I saw him start his life over, he started his own company and I was so proud of him!!
Everything was great for eight years, until one day he told me that my step mom and sister left him and he would sell everything and come back to the country. This was the last time I would ever hear of them, they vanished, I mourned my step sister for years. This was also when his life fell apart.
At 17 adulthood came with a lot of revelations. My mom told me that my dad had been an addict since he was very young, before I was born, my whole life, cocaine and alcohol amongst other things, and everyone around him had been putting up with it and helping him but couldn't take it anymore. He had cheated on her when they had me and had cheated on my step mom too. He would lie to get what he wanted and trusting him was getting increasingly harder.
All of my memories of him were now seen through a different lens. I felt betrayed. I could now tell every time he had been high, and knew where the money he asked of me when to, I was aware of every little lie. I was angry and frustrated at him for the pain he caused my mom and everyone around him. And for squandering the potential I knew he had, for always making the wrong decisions, one mistake after another. And I hated feeling this way the most.
After he came back to the country alone he could never recover, he would relapse, overdose, refuse rehab or any medical help. He would escape psychiatrics facilities and hospitals in the middle of the night, he was a menace!! lmao.
Our relationship was still good despite all this, different but still standing, he had always been my friend even if he wasn't the best at being a dad or partner, I would always scold him and tell him of different job opportunities I came up with for him to try out but now there was this distance between us. I became the parent of the relationship in a way and he didn't like being told what to do. I saw him spiral and I was scared for him.
I've always heard all these stories about addicts finding purpose and fighting for their loved ones, so every time he would jokingly talk to me about how high he was and seemed to enjoy it despite my warnings and pleading it made me feel like I was not enough of a reason to get better, as self centered as it may be I was a teen and I felt powerless to stop him, insignificant. People could get better for their children, but not for me.
I knew this way of thinking was flawed and selfish and he was the one struggling, I knew he was a victim. I spent the last of my teenage years and early twenties trying to fight back this feeling so I could preserve our relationship, we always kept in contact but over time he changed and was no longer the person I knew.
He became a stranger, often times incoherent and delusional, his views changed, he was paranoid, his addiction got worse and worse and now all I could feel was pity and guilt, our once good relationship was now reduced to a few interactions where he would ask me for money, I knew I was possibly funding his self destruction and he was likely lying to me but he also needed to pay for medication and so I couldn't refuse him.
I had my own life now, a husband and plans for the future. When I decided to move abroad a few years ago I knew our hug goodbye could be the last, he was broke and unstable but I thought once I was settled and had a job and a citizenship I could have enough money to get him tickets to visit and show him the life I had made for myself like he had done in my childhood.
But then Covid happened, and he would never agree to make calls. Soon after he was diagnosed with cancer, I would ask about his health and he would say he was fine. He wasn't fine, he was smoking 4 packs a day. He got the cancer removed but refused further treatment, he said he didn't have any purpose left in life and no reasons to keep living, he had a stroke and couldn't feel half his body when he was forcibly hospitalized, his cancer had spread and he hadn't been eating for a long time, he hid all this from me, I first heard it from my aunt in tears over the phone yesterday, he tried to escape the hospital in the night and had to be tied up and sedated, he never woke up.
He died alone, all that is left of his family is me and my aunt and we both live in different countries. There is nobody there to even bury him. I feel like I abandoned him. I've always known I would feel this way when this day came, in a way I've been mourning him for many years and have carried this guilt for even longer.
I had the coolest dad, cocaine took him away. I wish this had a better and uplifting message. I just wanted to get this off my chest. He taught me a lot and made me who I am, and I have a lot of great memories with him. He struggled all of his life with his mental health and despite it all he was still amazing and deserved so much better.
He always said that when he was a ghost he would follow me around, I hope he isl!! so I can live for both of us, I love you dad!! and I'm so sorry 🕯️
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watching a video about eugenia cooney and realizing how our lives are extremely similar 😶
#❤️🩹#ed#the whole thing about her mom. it's like having my own memories played back to me#i feel so fucking bad for her
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「 ✦ Not One of your girls.✦ 」
[part1][Theodore Nott × reader] [p2]
Summary: Theodore Nott was the love of my life, the one I'd trade my whole world for. But this summer, I yearned for a different role in his life, even if it meant becoming just one of his girls
Warning:fluff, angst, smut, strong language.
Words:6.5k
Tears? I don't think I had any left. It felt like I'd spent the past month in a self-imposed exile, navigating the city with a map etched into my memory solely to avoid him. Ignoring calls, dodging mutual friends. I'd become a ghost in my own life, flitting from corner to corner, hoping i won’t see him, anything to escape the phantom touch, the memory of his smirk.
Lana's call shattered the fragile peace I'd constructed. Her voice, usually bubbly with gossip, held a worried tremor. "Something's definitely wrong, (Y/N)," Lana had pressed over the phone, her voice laced with concern. "You sound… empty.”
I'd lied, of course. "Just the summer blues, Lani. Missing you like crazy."
"Uh-huh," she said, skepticism thick in her voice. "Well, guess what? I'm finally coming home! You gotta come get me from the airport, promise?"
"Of course," I said easily, even when the thought of the airport twisting the knife in my gut.
“Theo's picking me up, you wanna come with him ?"
"Actually," I hesitated, hating the way my voice betrayed me, "I was kind of thinking maybe I could… tag along with Chris?"
There was a beat of surprised silence, then a slow, knowing chuckle from Lana. "Whoa, okay, didn't see that coming. You sure you don't want me to ask Theo?"
The name sent a fresh spike of pain through me. "Theo? Absolutely not. Have you seen the way he drives?…" I trailed off, unable to voice the truth – anything but Theo.
A pang shot through me as I descended the stairs, catching sight of Mom lost in thought, staring at the picture of Theo, Mattheo, and my brother as kids. They were all smiles, dirt smudged on their faces, a testament to countless childhood adventures. A ghost of a smile touched my lips. "I miss him too," I whispered, reaching out to touch her shoulder.
Mom jumped slightly, startled from her reverie. Her eyes softened the moment they landed on me. "(Y/N)! Honey, I was just about to check on you. Your father and I were getting worried sick." She took my hand, her concern evident in the gentle squeeze.
"Just… thinking," I hedged, forcing a smile onto my face. The last thing I needed was to worry them. "Everything's fine."
Mom eyed me skeptically. "Are you sure? You haven't been yourself lately."
"Just hitting adulthood, finally," I joked, trying to lighten the mood. Mom chuckled, swatting my chest playfully.
"Dinner at the Nott family tonight, don't forget," she announced, and my smile faltered.
"Oh, no, Mom, I… I actually promised my book club I'd be there tonight," I stammered, desperately searching for an excuse. "And you know Lana's still at camp, I think you guys should go without me."
My mom's brow furrowed in confusion. "Book club? Since when? And Lana? Honey, is everything alright?"
The playful glint in her eyes betrayed her. "My little (Y/N) is finally done with her crush on the Nott boy?" she teased, a knowing smile playing on her lips.
My cheeks burned. Forced cheer felt hollow on my tongue. "Mom, stop it! I was a child."
Memories flooded back – seven-year-old me, a torrent of tears streaming down my face, demanding to know why I couldn't marry Theo. "Why can't you just ask Dad to talk to Mr. Nott and arrange something? We'll be perfect together!" I'd sobbed, clinging to her leg. Mom had knelt then, wiping away my tears, and promised she'd think about it when I grew up.
A soft sigh escaped her lips as she leaned down to kiss my cheek. "Alright, sweetie. I'll get your back tonight. Have fun at your book club."
The irony wasn't lost on me. Here I was, meticulously applying a full face of makeup and curling my hair into perfect waves for a nonexistent book club. My reflection in the mirror mocked me – glitter practically danced across my eyelids in the afternoon light, Crisscross Backless Ruched Glitter
Bodycon Dress a stark contrast to the sweatpants I'd worn all day.
But hey, desperate times called for desperate measures. My parents wouldn't question a night out if I looked the part, makeup a dead giveaway. It was a flimsy cover, but hopefully good enough.
Reaching for my lipstick holder, the answer was clear as day. Red. Classic, bold, unapologetic red. It was the perfect armor for the night – a stark reminder to myself that beneath the hurt, beneath the carefully constructed lie, I was still (Y/N). The same girl who knew what she wanted and wasn't afraid to go after it. Maybe Theo didn't see me that way anymore, but that didn't mean I had to lose myself entirely.
Tonight, I was reclaiming my power, one red lip at a time.
Three clicks of the shutter button later, and I deemed myself a goddess incarnate. The glitter shimmered under the lamplight, the perfect complement to the bold red lip. Caption time. A mischievous grin tugged at my lips.
> Now he's thinkin' bout me every night, oh Is it that sweet? I guess so
"Well, hello again, Instagram," I muttered, hitting post with a flourish. It took less than a minute for the validation to flood in.
> @BlaiseZabini: it's me I'm him.
> @LanaNott: girllll save me please save me.
> @MattheoRiddle: who !? C d ?
@EnzoBerkshire: is he why you dumped all of us for (planning a murder).
@christiannott: pretty.
The school crowd joined in the comments their comments a mix of compliments and playful questions. I couldn't help but grin at Blaise, Mattheo, and Enzo's antics.
Just as I settled on popcorn and a night of "The Devil Wears Prada" indulgence, my phone buzzed with a notification I wasn't expecting – a DM. My heart hammered against my ribs. It was from him.
> Theo (hopefully future husband): what kind of bookclub are you at?
I cringed at the outdated nickname in my phone (quickly changing it to "Theodore Nott").
Ignoring the actual question (because seriously?), I left him in read and hit play on the movie. Let him stew in his curiosity for a while.
But just as Meryl Streep was delivering a particularly scathing line, my phone buzzed again. A new message from Theodore Nott.
> theo: answer Y/N
The audacity of this man! I rolled my eyes, grabbed a handful of popcorn, and with a triumphant smirk, sent a single reply: A middle finger emoji .
A blaring ringtone ripped me from a dream .Groaning, I fumbled for my phone, squinting at the caller ID. Lana.
"Hello?" I mumbled, my voice thick with sleep.
"Girl, what the heck? I knew there was something you were hiding! You gonna tell me everything when I arrive?"
I flopped back against the pillows, belatedly registering the popcorn scattered on the duvet and the movie paused mid-scene. My mom must have tucked me in after I dozed off.
"Sure," I mumbled, still foggy and not entirely sure what there was to tell Lana anyway.
"I told Chris he'd wait for you at eight," she chirped.
Eight? Panic jolted me awake. I fumbled for the clock – it was already six.
"Why'd you wake me up now then?" I whined, sleep clinging to me desperately.
"First, how could you sleep when your best friend is finally coming home? Two, because you're taking forever to get ready!"
I rolled my eyes, fighting the urge to sink back into the blissful oblivion of sleep. "Fine, fine," I conceded.
A quick shower later, I threw on a pair of comfy shorts and a t-shirt. Kissing my dad, who'd made a valiant effort to whip up breakfast ("Scrambled eggs are your favorite, right?").
My phone buzzed. Theodore Nott. My heart hammered against my ribs in a frantic rhythm. I looked from the window – his car, sleek and black, was parked at the curb. No sign of Christian's Porsche.
"What the…" I breathed, a mix of anger and confusion swirling in my gut.
"I need to go, Papa," I mumbled, throwing him a quick kiss.
Reaching his car, I yanked open the door. "What are you doing here?" I spat, my voice laced with ice.
Theo didn't even glance at me. "Get in or go inside. I don't have time for this."
"Where's Chris?" I demanded, my jaw clenching.
He finally met my gaze, a flicker of annoyance crossing his features. "Business trip came up. Now get in."
There was no reasoning with him. With a silent snarl of frustration, I climbed into the passenger seat, slamming the door shut with enough force to make the fancy car wince. Not sure if Theo possessed human emotions, but I was pretty sure the love he had for his car was unquestionable.
"Great," he sighed, muttering a curse under his breath. It sounded suspiciously like "Accidenti!" – a mild Italian curse .
The rest of the ride was a tense standoff. I turned on the radio, defiant and childish, only for him to shut it off with a curt gesture. I shot him a fiery glare, then turned it back on, louder this time. The audacity of this man!
He cursed again, a string of angry Italian this time, but I drowned him out with the music, burying myself in my phone to avoid further interaction. The drive, thankfully, wasn't long and soon the familiar sight of the airport terminal loomed ahead.
Theo pulled into the airport garage, his face a mask of irritation. I flung open the door, slamming it shut for good measure. His glare was met with an equally icy stare from me. A quick glance at my watch told me it was 9:55 – hopefully Lana wouldn't make me wait too long. Anything was preferable to another minute in Theo's company.
Relief washed over me when I spotted her, a blur of pink and blonde hair bouncing through the arrivals gate. Her shriek echoed through the terminal as she launched herself at Theo, who caught her in a hug. They looked…comfortable. Happy.
"Look what I got you!" Lana exclaimed, pulling back and revealing a silver bracelet with a delicate Larus bird charm. It was beautiful. My gaze flickered to Theo, who offered a small smile.
"Do you like it?" she chirped, her eyes sparkling with anticipation.
"Of course," Theo replied, leaning down to kiss her forehead. "It's perfect."
Then she was on me, engulfing me in a suffocating hug and babbling a mile a minute in a language that sounded suspiciously like excited Italian. It took a moment to decipher her words.
"Look! I got us matching Larus bird bracelets!" she chirped, holding up another identical bracelet.
I smiled as I took it from her, sliding it onto my wrist. "Thanks, Lana. It's beautiful."
"So, you took good care of her for me, like I asked?" Lana's voice turned teasing, her eyes flitting between Theo and me.
Before Theo could even open his mouth, I shot him a withering look. "You have no idea," I muttered, my voice dripping with sarcasm.
Back in the car, Lana dominated the entire ride with a nonstop stream of chatter. I plastered a smile on my face and offered occasional nods, punctuated by the stolen glance at Theo in the rearview mirror.
Finally, we pulled into my driveway. Lana turned to me, bouncing with barely contained excitement. "Get some sleep, (Y/N)! We're all hitting the beach tonight – no excuses! We'll pick you up at ten, right Theo?"
My heart sank. Theo and I hadn't spoken a single word the entire ride, and the last thing I wanted was to spend another evening in his company.
"I—" I began, but Lana cut me off.
"No buts, (Y/N)! I'm serious," she said, her voice losing its playful edge. Her puppy-dog eyes were impossible to resist. Plus, the thought of disappointing her was unbearable.
With a forced smile, I nodded in agreement. "See you at ten," I mumbled, stepping out of the car I shut the car door with what I hoped was a significant bang (earning a "Hey!" from Theo and a giggle from Lana).
stormed up the steps and into my house. Reaching my room, I flung myself onto the bed and screamed into my pillow.
With a mission in mind, I flung open my dresser drawer. I pulled out the beach dress I'd bought with Mom, the one she'd teased me looked straight out of a goddess painting. "Playing Aphrodite?" she'd chuckled. Maybe a little Aphrodite action wouldn't hurt.
Packing was simple – a book for lounging, my makeup bag (waterproof mascara, a must!), sunscreen (just in case), and a water bottle. An extra layer? Nah, I was channeling beach goddess vibes today.
The pièce de résistance, however, was hidden beneath the dress – a hot pink bikini .
My phone buzzed on the nightstand – Lana calling. I swiped on another layer of lip gloss, the vibrant pink a perfect match for my mischievous mood.
Theo was already waiting by his car, a scowl etched on his face. I marched up to him, a mischievous glint in my eyes, and tossed the beach bag through the air. He caught it with a surprised grunt, his scowl deepening, a single word escaping my lips, "Catch."
A quick hug for Lana later, I slid into the backseat. Reaching for my phone, a notification from Marco, the cute Italian boy I'd met last year while visiting Italy , made me grin. He'd liked my recent post and even sent a DM.
"Hey, Lana," I began, tapping away at my phone, not taking my eyes off the screen as Theo threw the car into gear. "What does 'Mi sono perso nei tuoi occhi' mean?"
Lana's voice squeaked from the front seat. "Oh. My. God. He said… he said he's lost in your eyes! (Y/N), who on earth did you message?" Her voice rose in excitement, her body practically contorting as she tried to snatch a peek at my phone.
I playfully shoved her away as she tried to grab my phone for a closer look. "Stop it lan," I laughed, trying to mask the flutter in my stomach.
"Isn't a little soon to be moving on, (Y/N)?"
My jaw dropped, mirroring Lana's shocked expression in the rearview mirror. My eyes stung with a sudden wave of hurt. "What the actual—move on from what?" Lana sputtered, her voice a mix of outrage and disbelief.
"Can you mind your business, please?" I snapped at Theo, my voice tight with anger.
"Actually, it kind of is," he snapped back, his gaze fixed on the road ahead. "You're stuck with me for the entire day, remember?"
"Since when did you care about anything I did?"
The car swerved slightly as Theo tightened his grip on the wheel. "I care about you not getting hurt," he growled.
"Hurt? From a harmless compliment?" I spat. "Maybe you should worry more about the real hurt you caused, Theo."
Lana's voice cut through the tension, sharp and laced with genuine concern. "What? What do you mean, (Y/N)? What hurt did he cause?"
"I—" I started, the words catching in my throat."I didn't mean myself," the lie tasting bitter on my tongue.
He looked at me then, his gaze flickering to the tears welling up in my eyes.
I couldn't take it anymore. I grabbed my AirPods, the familiar comfort a lifeline in the storm. Cranking the volume to full blast, I shut out the world, focusing on the music that pulsed in my ears. I stared out the window, the world blurring into a watercolor mess.
The car jolted to a stop, and I practically leaped out before it even came to a complete halt. Grabbing my bag, I stormed towards the beach, the setting sun painting the sky in fiery hues. The familiar sight of the carnival near the shore grounded me slightly.
Enzo, was the first to spot me. He erupted in a whoop, and I practically dived into his welcoming embrace. The rest of the group soon followed, a cacophony of greetings washing over me.
Blaise, ambled towards me, a sheepish grin plastered on his face. I promptly blocked him with a hand on his chest. "You, Blaise, are officially banned from my life for at least another month."
"Come on, (Y/N)! I already took enough abuse on my beautiful face that night from that..." he trailed off, his eyes flicking towards Theo.
"Not a word," I hissed, cutting him off before he could spill the beans. "Don't you dare say a thing about it, or you're dead, Blaise. I swear."
A flicker of surprise crossed his face, quickly replaced by a resigned nod. "Alright, alright, secrets are safe with me." He slunk away, plopping down on the sand beside Enzo.
Across from me, Theo sat his gaze boring into me with an intensity that sent shivers down my spine. He kept staring,His gaze was intense, burning into mine like he could see right through me, so I used the tried and true method – a good old-fashioned middle finger.
He met my gesture with a head shake, a hint of a smile playing on his lips as he lit a cigarette.
The sounds of laughter and chatter filled the air as our friends settled in for the evening. Inside, I felt a storm brewing – a mix of anger, hurt, and a strange, unidentifiable longing.
"Alright, guys! Who's up for truth or dare?" Lana's voice boomed, shattering the fragile peace.
"Childish," Mattheo scoffed.
"Pleeeease?" Lana pleaded, batting her eyelashes at him. He caved with a sigh, a lovesick smile playing on his lips.
"Actually, I have a bottle," I announced, reaching into my bag and pulling out my water bottle.
"Always prepared, sweet (Y/N)," Draco teased, blowing me a kiss. I countered with a playful air kiss.
"Not playing," Theo mumbled, blowing another smoke ring into the air.
"Coward," I whispered, not sure if he heard me. But apparently, he did.
"What did you say?" he challenged, his gaze hardening.
"Coward," I repeated, my voice gaining strength with each iteration. "Coward, coward, coward." I batted my eyelashes with a saccharine smile. "Want me to say it louder?"
"Okay, enough," Mattheo interjected, shooting a warning look at both of us. "You're playing, and you're going to stop."
Enzo, grabbed the bottle from me. "Let's get this party started, then! Spin it!"
The bottle wobbled and spun, finally landing on Lana with a triumphant thud.
"Truth or dare?" Enzo grinned.
"Dare!" she declared, her eyes sparkling with excitement.
"I dare you to reveal one of (Y/N)'s secrets," he challenged, a mischievous glint in his eyes.
Lana's jaw dropped.
"It's okay, Lani," I mumbled, "Choose whatever you want, babe. No secrets here."
"Holy moly, you're not scared?" Blaise exclaimed, his eyebrows raised in surprise.
"I don't regret anything I do," I declared, holding Theo's gaze. "If it was a secret, it means I didn't want it out there enough. So, not worth keeping."
My defiance sent a smirk across my face, but inside, I was a mess. Theo muttered a barely audible curse under his breath.
Lana, ever the drama queen, paused for effect. "Well, you definitely have a thing for Italian! You might not have said it, but I just know..." she leaned in conspiratorially, "...saying one simple phrase in Italian would have you blushing like crazy, thinking it's a marriage proposal."
A roar of laughter erupted from the group, even Theo cracking a small smile.
"Buongiorno, bella," Blaise cooed in his best Italian accent, earning another round of laughter and a playful shove from me.
We continued playing truth or dare, the mood a strange mix of tension and laughter. The bottle finally landed on Blaise, a mischievous glint in his eyes.
He leaned in, his voice barely a whisper, "Remember our little agreement, (Y/N)?" I pursed my lips, silently mouthing, "Don't cross the line." He winked, then addressed me in a louder voice, "Truth or dare?"
"Dare," I declared, a defiant edge to my voice.
"I dare you to take your dress off " he started, his voice trailing off dramatically.
A collective groan went up, except for Mattheo who smirked, and Enzo who playfully swatted Blaise's shoulder.
"What are you? a ten years old? You think I'd run away crying?" I challenged, a spark of defiance igniting within me. In one swift motion, I slipped out of the flowy beach dress, revealing the hot pink bikini underneath.
A low whistle escaped Blaise's lips. "Damn, girl! No wonder poor Cedric stood no chance. You could've driven him crazy with that bod."
I winked at him, relishing the surprised look on Lana's face. "Something to consider," I joked, trying to mask the storm of emotions brewing inside.
Theo, however, seemed less amused. "For f*ck's sake," he muttered under his breath, his voice laced with a hint of something I couldn't decipher.
Blaise smirked. "What's wrong, Theo? Can't handle the heat?"
For a second, I thought Theo was going to kill him. He clenched his jaw, his gaze burning into Blaise. "Just finish this stupid game already," he growled.
The tension was thick enough to choke on, and I decided to take back control. I snatched the bottle, spinning it with a flick of my wrist. As if mocking me, it landed squarely on Theo.
"Truth or dare?" I asked, my voice steady despite the tremor in my heart. Meeting his gaze was like looking into a stormy sea – the pain, confusion, and maybe even a flicker of longing swirling within.
"Truth," he muttered, his voice barely above a whisper.
"Do you regret anything… right now?" Each word felt like a shard of glass in my throat, but I forced them out.
He held my gaze for an agonizing moment, then let out a ragged breath. "No," he finally said.
The answer hit me like a physical blow. It was the confirmation of what I'd already suspected, yet it still managed to shatter the fragile hope that had flickered within me.
We played two more rounds, the air heavy with unspoken words. Lana, seemingly oblivious to the tension, had dozed off, her head resting on my lap.
"I'm taking her to bed," Theo announced, bending down to scoop her up gently.
The sunrise was painting the sky in vibrant hues of orange and pink, casting long shadows on the beach. I closed my eyes, needing an escape from the whirlwind of emotions. "Going for a swim," I mumbled, a hollow ache settling in my chest.
Without waiting for a response, I raced towards the water, the cool waves washing over me as I plunged into the ocean. The salty water stung my eyes, but I didn't bother to brush it away. Here, in the vastness of the ocean, I could finally let go of the facade of bravado and let the tears flow freely.
I swam until my muscles screamed in protest. Exhausted but strangely calm, I watched as the others retreated to the house, leaving me alone with the sound of the waves crashing against the shore. Pushing the wet hair out of my face, I waded back to the beach, shivering as the cool morning air hit my damp skin.
Walking towards the back of the house, the first rays of sunlight warmed my back. I turned a corner, and just like that, I slammed into a solid wall of muscle. It was Theo.
I stumbled back, heart hammering against my ribs. "What are you doing here?" I snapped, the anger a shield against the vulnerability I refused to show.
"Enough, (Y/N). Stop this foolish game," he said, his voice low and intense.
"Foolish game? Don't you dare call my life a game, Theo," I spat, fury bubbling up inside me.
He stepped closer, his hand reaching out to grab my waist. Before I could react, he'd captured both my wrists in one of his large hands. He was close, so close I could feel the heat radiating off his body, his cologne a familiar scent that sent a shiver down my spine.
My heart hammered a frantic rhythm against my ribs, caught between the fear of getting hurt again and the undeniable pull I felt towards him.
"That?" he said, his voice laced with frustration as his gaze flickered down to the pink bikini clinging to my curves. "Is this what you're doing? Whoring yourself out?"
A bitter laugh escaped my lips. "Whoring myself out?" I mocked him. "Why do you even care, Theo? You made it perfectly clear you don't give a damn what I do, who I'm with, how I act."
He looked at me, his jaw clenched tight. "You will go inside," he said, his voice a low growl. "You will stop whatever you are doing, and you will not… whore yourself out like that again. Understood?"
The possessiveness in his voice, the way his gaze lingered on my body, sent a jolt through me. But I wouldn't let him control me.
I yanked my hands free, taking a step back. "You have no right to tell me what to do."
His eyes narrowed, but then he shifted his gaze, and for a fleeting moment, it landed on my lips. My breath hitched, my body reacting instinctively to his silent scrutiny.
He cleared his throat, the tension in the air crackling like electricity. "Y/N," he warned, his voice a husky whisper.
Then, before I could even process what was happening, he leaned in.
A mischievous grin spread across my face. "Were you watching me swim?" I asked, tilting my head up to meet his gaze.
He didn't answer, his jaw clenched tight. But something in his eyes, a flicker of heat, betrayed him.
"Just making sure you didn't drown," he finally muttered, his voice gruff.
I couldn't help myself. I burst out laughing. "So that's why you're so… hard right now?" I teased, my voice dripping with playful innocence.
He glared at me, but there was a hint of something else in his eyes.”No,”.
I could feel the tension between us, thick and palpable. Theo's breathing was ragged, his words barely coherent as I teased him, my hand brushing over his stomach under his t-shirt.
"Are you sure?" I whispered, fluttering my lashes at him with a practiced innocence.
"Yeah," he managed to force out, his voice rough and unsteady. I saw his Adam's apple bob with a swallow as my hand grazed lower, sending a jolt through him.“Fuck y/n”
A smirk played on my lips as I traced a finger along his jawline. "Is that what you say when you… touch yourself?" I teased, my voice dripping with a sweetness that seemed foreign on my tongue. "Do you think of me?"
He looked at me, his gaze intense, his reply barely a gasp. "No."
"No?" I feigned surprise, leaning in closer. "So, you don't want me to help you now?" I purred, my voice dropping to a seductive murmur. "You don't want me to…" I trailed off.
"Get on my knees, right here, right now?" I finished suggestively.
He didn't respond, his breathing ragged and shallow. I pressed on, my voice dropping to a husky whisper. "I would let you," I breathed,"I would let you take me right here, right now. You could do whatever you wanted to me, anything at all."``
"Would you want me to do that?" I whispered, feeling his hand grip the wall for support.
I grabbed his hand and put on the heat between my thighs. A sharp gasp escaped my lips as his fingers grazed me, sending a jolt of electricity through my body. "See, I'm so wet already," I breathed, he leaned down, urgency in his kiss. I met him halfway, the taste of him both familiar and forbidden.
We broke apart, gasping for air. Before his lips could find mine again, I distracted him, freeing one hand and guiding his face towards the sensitive skin of my neck. His lips and tongue danced across the exposed flesh, sending shivers down my spine.
With his hair caught in my hand, I pulled his head back, then sank to my knees in front of him. Looking up at him, I whispered, "Can I, please?"
"Fuck," he muttered, nodding reluctantly.
I unbuttoned his jeans, looking up at him as I lowered his boxers. "You're so hard, Theo," I remarked, meeting his gaze. "It must be painful, isn't it?"
As I took him in, I continued in a feigned innocence, "You know, I've never done this before, Theo. Never been on my knees like this for someone before."
"But I'll do it for you," I whispered, locking eyes with him. "Because I'll do anything for you, even if you hurt me. I don't care."
I wrapped my lips around the head of his cock, feeling him twitch in response. He cursed, and I pulled away, planting soft kisses along his length. "So, you didn’t think of me doing that when you masturbate?" I asked, my voice teasing.
"I did—fuck, I did, and I hated myself for that," he confessed, his voice strained with desire.
I started to slide my mouth down his shaft, tasting the salty precum that had already leaked out. He moaned, his hands tangling in my hair as I took him deeper, swirling my tongue around him.
"Oh, fuck,", his praise spurring me on. "That feels so good, baby. You're so good at this."
I started to move my head up and down, taking him deeper with each stroke. I could feel him getting harder in my mouth, and I knew he was enjoying this.
"Yes, just like that," Theo said, his voice strained.
I started to suck harder, using my tongue to tease the sensitive skin of his cock. I could feel him getting closer to the edge, and I knew I had to keep going.
I wrapped my hand around the base of his cock, my fingers gripping him tightly as I began to move my head back and forth. I took him deeper, feeling his cock hit the back of my throat. I could feel him pulsing in my mouth, and I knew he was about to cum.
"Fuck, I'm gonna cum," he groaned, his grip in my hair tightening.
I continued, sucking harder and faster, bringing him to the edge. But just as he was about to release, I pulled away abruptly.
"What —what the fuck?"
I stood up, pushing my hair back with a smirk. "So, you believed that?" I asked, seeing the confusion and frustration in his eyes.
"Believed what?" he asked, breathing heavily and clearly confused.
"That night, did you actually believe what I said?" I taunted, tracing his face lightly with my fingertips. "I just said what I had to get what I wanted, Theo. And it worked. I had you. It was… fun."
I continued, reveling in the power shift, "so actually you were one of my boys, all wrapped around my finger."
"I would pull my jeans up if I were you," I advised with a finality that hung heavy in the air.
Every word that tumbled out of my mouth was a lie, a carefully woven tapestry of deceit designed to inflict the same searing pain I felt. I wanted him to see himself reflected in the cruel mirror of my words, to understand the depth of the wound he'd left gaping in my heart.
I turned away, heading back to the house and eventually to the shared room with Lana. Once in the bathroom, I started the shower and sank to the ground, my legs giving out beneath me, as I let out a sob that wracked my entire body. The pain of his rejection, the guilt of my actions, the hurt of my unrequited love – it all came crashing down upon me in a wave of despair.
The drive home was a suffocating silence, punctuated only by the rhythmic hum of the engine. I'd fabricated a story about catching the flu, needing to rest. The lietasted acrid on my tongue, but facing Lana, facing anyone, felt impossible.
Back in my room, the familiar walls seemed to close in on me. I sank onto the bed, burying myself in the covers. Theo's calls came one after another, his texts a constant reminder of the conversation left hanging. "We need to talk," they pleaded, each message a fresh wave of guilt crashing over me.
The sting of betrayal still lingered, but today, I craved solace. Seeking refuge in a familiar spot, I found myself nestled amongst the vibrant blooms near the bridge. Here, the gentle murmur of the water and the sweet scent of flowers offered a temporary escape.
Time seemed to blur as I sat there, lost in thought. Then, a shadow fell across me. Startled, I looked up to find Theo's hesitant gaze. Surprise momentarily rendered me speechless.
"Can I sit?" he asked, his voice laced with a vulnerability I hadn't seen before. A silent nod was all I could manage.
He lowered himself beside me, leaning back against the tree trunk. The silence between us was thick, heavy with unspoken emotions. My gaze drifted across the field, a silent plea for him to break the tension.
"The night before it happened…" he began, his voice thick with emotion, "I promised your brother I'd take care of you."
My head snapped towards him, surprise etching across my face.
"I promised," he continued, meeting my gaze. "That's why I tried so hard to push you away. I couldn't bear the thought of anything happening to you, of failing him."
A wave of guilt washed over me. "Theo…" I began, but he cut me off, his hand reaching out to clasp mine.
"It didn't work, though, did it?" he said, a wry smile playing on his lips. "I told myself I should only see you as a sister, but I couldn't. And that scared me. So I tried to push you away, as much as it hurt me"
"it did hurt me too y/n," he admitted. "The moment you kissed me…everything changed. I didn’t know you felt the same. It, and it scared me. I needed to regain control."
A lump formed in my throat as he revealed his turmoil. "Then the kiss," he continued, his voice barely a rasp. "Everything changed. I didn't know you felt that way, and I panicked. Tried to regain control."
A tear escaped, tracing a glistening path down my cheek. "When Blaise brought you in... this night" he continued, his eyes searching mine, "I was a wreck. I felt like I'd betrayed your brother, tainted something so pure."
"What I did after, it was unfair. Unforgivable. You're not just another girl, Y/N. You're the only one. The only one I want. And even if it takes a lifetime to make things right, I will. Because I love you. I can't hide it anymore."
Tears welled up in my eyes, threatening to spill over. "I didn't mean anything I said at the beach," I confessed. "I just... I wanted to hurt you like you hurt me."
He reached out, his hand gently cupping my face. "We messed up," i said, "We hurt each other."
Tears escaped, tracing warm paths down my cheeks. "But maybe we can fix it," I whispered, a sliver of hope flickering within me.
He brushed away my tears, his touch so soft . "I deserve the pain," he say,"But you don't. I'm so sorry, Y/N. So sorry for everything."
A bittersweet smile spread across my face. "I love you too," I confessed, the words tumbling out like a long-held secret. It felt surreal, a dream come true whispered on the wind.
He leaned in slowly, his lips brushing mine in a soft, tentative kiss. It was a perfect collision of emotions – tenderness, passion, and a promise of a new beginning. He deepened the kiss, pulling me onto his lap, our bodies aligning perfectly.
When he pulled away, his eyes sparkled with an intensity that sent a jolt through me. "Give me a chance," he pleaded. "To make things right. I'll never hurt you again. I don't deserve forgiveness, but I'm begging for it. Please, let me make it up to you."
"I forgave you already," I admitted, "but can you say it again? Just to be sure I didn't imagine it."
A smile, genuine and heartfelt, softened his features. He leaned back in, his lips whispering the words against mine, "I love you, Y/N L/N."
My heart soared. "I think I might die happy right now," I joked, trying to lighten the mood.
Suddenly, a nagging thought surfaced. "But what about Lana? We need to tell her."
Theo's smile faltered for a moment. "Believe me, she knows," he said with a sigh. "Apparently, she's celebrating you being her 'sister' and even thanked me for it."
I couldn't help but laugh. It sounded like something Lana would do. "Of course, that sounds like her,"
Suddenly, a playful glint sparked in his eyes. "Now," he drawled, a hint of jealousy lacing his voice, "about that Italian boy?"
I couldn't help but burst into laughter. Leaning in, I wrapped my arms around him, burying my face in his chest. "There's nothing to worry about," I mumbled against his shirt.
He chuckled, the sound vibrating through me. "Good," he said, his arms tightening around me in a possessive hug. "Because I was planning a little trip to Italy."
─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ── ─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ── ─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆
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i don't know what you mean to me,
detective!jihyo x spiderwoman!reader (pt.2)
summary: jihyo completely ignores what the chief had told her not to do, she can't help it when it involves working with spiderwoman.
wc: 6k
warnings: cursing ; brief mention of a scar ; that's it i think ; lesbians flirting ; rushed proofreading
pt.1, pt. 3
a/n: this has been sitting in my docs for a while, tried to make it a bit exciting! I wasn't planning on making this a series, but here I am. enjoy!! hope it lives to your guys' expectations (T-T)
-
“how’s your job?” the chief asks, swirling the coffee in his cup.
“it’s good. they said they were impressed with my work.” you mumble against the cup of coffee before taking a careful sip, trying not to burn your tongue.
“that’s good. you’ve always been so smart like your parents.” your uncle says, his eyes softening. you smile, though it’s a small, weak smile and your heart aches a bit at the thought of your parents.
would they be proud of you now? and your side ‘job?’
you had a cliche backstory for someone with powers, a "hero" backstory. life was great until middle school, your parents died around that time. you were also too smart for your own good; sure, it was a plus in school, but it was not a plus for your teenage social life. you had pretty comic-worthy trauma and yeah, it hurt to think about it here and there, made you ponder and sulk at the ungodly hours of the night, but it was a while ago and you learned how to cope.
despite the emotional damage it caused, it definitely made you stronger, shaped you into who you are today, and is the reason you play "hero." bad experiences give you good lessons, that's what your mom had told you. your dad had told you something similar, something along the lines of "with great power, comes great responsibility," your dad always had a way with words.
the loud sound of a folder making contact with the wooden table is made so abruptly and you flinch a bit, looking up to see who had slammed it down so aggressively: park jihyo–the same person who had patched you up two weeks ago.
the detective wore a stern expression on her face, something mixed with anger and worry as she furrowed her brows while also deepening her gaze on your uncle, eyes filled with a certain flame of authority. park slides the folder toward your uncle: the chief of the police department.
chief l/n isn't the best guy to be related to when your part-time gig is swinging around the city as the person he's not too fond of. unlucky you.
“chief, this one is… just look.” jihyo sighs. your uncle's brows crease as he pulls the papers out from the orange, paper folder. jihyo continues to speak, “5 people dead, and fourteen severely injured.”
jihyo looks at you for a split second, and you look back at her. it's not the best time to start reminiscing, but theres a sudden memory of you that she recalls—the first time she met you.
the first interaction she had with you was four months ago; the impression you had left on her was a great one—it really piqued her interest in you. it's really not time to start having flashbacks to when she had met her boss's niece, but here she is.
-
“jihyo, this is my niece y/n.” chief l/n had introduced, smiling and patting you on the back.
chief l/n had always forgotten to bring lunch, and your aunt hated that. your aunt turned you into a personal messenger, a cheap (not even, you got scammed) delivery woman, so you were forced to drop off lunch for your uncle, some type of udon soup thing with fishcakes scattered around in the thermos (you couldn't lie, it smelled good and you were a bit jealous that she hadn't made you any lunch the first time you started living with them and working on your own).
the first thing jihyo noticed was that you had the chief's brown eyes, and you two were similar in the way that you were taller than most – your uncle being 6’4 inches of pure muscle and strength, a whole tank for a chief and his build fit the role. jihyo had guessed you were around 5’8, you also seemed to have some muscle from what she could tell, a prominent build with broader shoulders and toned arms, you seemed rather fit and active. there were common similarities in physical features and body language; you two were definitely related.
the detective had also noticed that you were particularly pleasing to look at.
your face looked like it had been sculpted to perfection: you had a strong, sharp jawline, and prominent cheekbones that rivaled even some models she had seen in the magazines at the local grocery store. your eyes were similar to your uncles, they had a softer look, though, and were noticeably striking. your lips were a dark peach color, beautiful and plump. every aspect and feature on your face was put together to construct such a captivating sight, it honestly shook jihyo up slightly.
“it’s nice to meet you y/n,” jihyo had greeted, “i never knew you had a niece, chief.”
“ah, well this little one-”
“i’m 24.” you sighed, furrowing your brows as your uncle chuckled playfully.
“whatever, whatever. you’re still very young,” the chief responds, “she landed a great internship at minatozaki industries, so she’s been staying at my place for the time being, probably a long time.” he adds proudly, hitting your back again and it makes you tense up a bit from the unintentional strength in the contact. your eyebrows crinkle and you wince—just for added effect.
“you’re a scientist?” jihyo questions,
“i’m a researcher for them.” you simply reply, “i journal and edit sometimes too, well—i've only written one article, actually.” you add with a shrug.
“that’s impressive,” jihyo says, and it really is because you’re a year younger than her and somehow you've landed an outstanding internship at one of the most thriving corporations in the city. you nod and end up transferring a bit more eye contact, which communicates a shared understanding and fondness between the two of you, there’s an exchanged interest.
the eye contact breaks when a repeating buzz is heard from your phone,
“oh, i have to go,” you mumble, “it was nice meeting you jihyo, hope we can talk more."
"me too, y/n," jihyo responds. you simply shoot another awkward grin.
"i’ll get going now. uncle, i’ll be home by six.” you finally add, waving while fixing the bag that slings across your body.
jihyo thinks you’re impressive.
-
“chief,”
“jihyo?” he says, still holding the paper of the report, but looking up at jihyo. the shorter woman sighs and bites the inside of her cheek,
“listen to me, just hear me out okay,” jihyo says. the chief focuses all his attention on the woman in front of him, all 5’3 inches of stubbornness and authority: his most outstanding employee, his favorite detective.
jihyo lets out a small breath.
“the suspect was reported to have been a lizard, chief. you think we can fight a man-sized, not even—it was bigger than a man, taller and bigger than you, apparently.” jihyo sighs, “i think we should find a way to contact spiderwoman-”
“absolutely not.” the chief says almost immediately, almost breaking the pen he had been holding in his hand. “i’m not letting that criminal ruin anything else.” he used the word criminal, it made your heart sink just a bit.
“chief, i don’t think you get it. this is a lizard. it’s something out of a comic, or movie. this isn’t some secret operation or regular thief, numerous officers were injured and people are dead l/n. one of the sergeants had lost his arm, and he barely made it.”
“what?” the chief voices in disbelief, his eyes widened. jihyo looks down at a spot at the coffee table,
“sergeant moon l/n. moon taeil, his arm…” jihyo trails off, looking down and biting the inside of her cheek.
your uncle pauses for a moment, looking down at the paper in his hand with incredulity. he darts back up at the woman and leans back in his chair, staring at the desk still perplexed. his jaw tightens up again as he closes his eyes, letting out a stressed sigh whilst pinching the bridge of his nose.
“i don’t trust that spiderwoman at all, detective. i know she saved your life twice, and yes i'm glad she did, but you shouldn’t trust so easily.” he starts. you seem to be a bystander, they seem so invested and heated in this conversation. you listen carefully.
“look, if you think about it: the lizard and that spider girl are the same, they have those special abilities. you might think ‘spider girl’ is good now, but she has the power to do as much harm as that lizard, and assumably more brains too. she could be extremely dangerous, what if we were to trust her? what if she takes advantage of us and boom, everything goes to shit.” the chief exaggerates the last part a bit, it takes both you and jihyo by surprise at how much emotion he uses as he expresses his distrust for spiderwoman.
“you really think we can take that lizard?” jihyo questions, her eyebrows crease and the hand that held her up as she leaned on the table tightens its grip on the edge of it. you take a sip from the banana milk in your hand as you listen, impressed and surprised at how heated your uncle is about his distrust for your other identity.
“jihyo, i get where you’re coming from, but it’s just not safe. i don’t trust her, especially after that damn drug operation incident. i mean, how would she have known about that? she just showed up and fucked up our plan, she could fuck up more than that and we’re just lucky it happened to be a crime scene that she had ‘tackled.’ do you get what i’m saying, park?”
jihyo nods, but she doesn’t make eye contact with the head of the police.
“yeah, i get where you’re coming from,” jihyo responds, “just a suggestion.”
you sit there in silence and stare at your uncle, a bit bewildered that he hates you that much, imagine if he knew that spiderwoman had heard him talking so much shit about her—you kind of want to laugh, even if it's belittling.
jihyo has this expression mixed with defeat and concern, it makes you frown. you don't like seeing jihyo so beat, especially because of your unwavering uncle. the chief of the police and you are close enough so that you can scold him playfully and talk to him like an adult, but this matter would leave you in an argument that you could never win. your uncle was stubborn and scary, even with you occasionally.
you wanted to talk to the detective as spiderwoman, you know she trusts you and you want to reassure her, it sucks to see her getting shut down like this. if it were just the two of you right now, you'd go on about how persistent and ridiculous your uncle is for shutting down this suggestion, you know you could work this out, but not now, not with chief l/n present.
“alright, i’ll get back to investigating this. let me know if you um, have any better suggestions that don’t involve her.” jihyo mumbles, voice getting smaller as she mutters the ‘her.’
before departing, detective park adds one more thing, “also, um, they’ve already planned to have a gathering of some sort for the victims, it was moon’s idea. i forgot to tell you, but it might be in your inbox." jihyo chokes out. "i’ll get going now.”
detective park can deal with rejection, and detective park can deal with her tenacious boss.
jihyo looks at the chief for a bit before her gaze sets on you. eye contact is made and you shoot her a "sorry about that" smile, and she replies with an “it’s okay” smile. you’ve always had this way of communicating quietly, at least in front of your uncle—no words needed—even though you two had known each other for only a bit.
detective park walks away with the papers she had taken back, her shoulders sink a little as she strolls out the door.
“that was kind of harsh.” you chide, almost glaring at your uncle with narrowed eyes.
“i just can’t stand that spiderwoman.”
thanks, you almost reply.
“i trust jihyo—don't get me wrong—she’s always been one with great ideas and plans, but this one… god that vigilante…”
“she can’t be that bad, what if she’s just doing it because, i don’t know,” you’re trying to frame your response as best as you can because how does one who isn’t spiderwoman word her motives for doing what she does? they'd either have to know her personally, or be her. “maybe she just feels a sense of responsibility with her abilities.”
“or maybe she’s a threat to us.”
“well,” and you almost continue, but this is chief l/n.
you stop trying after that.
-
jihyo almost died right then and there from shock.
“hi.” spiderwoman had said so casually—too casually for someone who had appeared behind the marble counter in the center of jihyo’s dimmed kitchen area.
“you just love breaking the law do you?” jihyo says in a stable tone, though her heart had been beating a little too fast from your unannounced visit (she tries to excuse it with how you shocked her, but it might just be from being able to have your stupidly charming self in her home).
“you’re not the chief, and i know you love me. i'd like to call my ‘law breaking’ a friendly surprise.” you beam, moving so you can sit on the counter. detective park can tell you're grinning, even with that stupid mask on. jihyo sighs and sits on her beige couch. she leans into it with a small, exhausted groan.
“what do you want? did you hurt yourself again?” the detective says with annoyance, but deep down there's some worry laced in the question—she’s also been wanting to see you again, especially after she had been rejected so harshly by her boss.
you shake your head. “no, just wanted to see my favorite worker in the police force.”
“yeah sure.” she groans, “how are your injuries?”
“aw, you care about me?” it comes out as almost a chuckle.
“never mind.” jihyo says, rolling her eyes playfully. a laugh leaves your lips and it’s a heartwarming moment, but it's strange to the both of you because you’re spiderwoman, a whole ‘criminal’ in jihyo’s apartment and you converse as if you’re two good friends.
“my injuries have been healing well,” you begin, “they closed up three days after you patched me up, it’s like they weren’t even there—kinda,” you explain. maybe you were lying a bit, there was still that faint scar that most people get after getting cut (in this case, you were cut much more than the average person would've been). the detective sits up from her seat and looks at the vigilante wide-eyed, her brows furrowing, and eyes narrowing as she looks at you in disbelief.
“are you serious? let me see, there’s no way.”
“hey, woah woah, usually women would take me out to dinner before they undress me.” you tease, laughing to yourself and jihyo knows you have that stupid grin on your face—though, she’d be lying if she said she didn’t want to see it again.
jihyo crosses her arms then leans back into the beige couch, you’re unbelievable.
(her heart warms up a little, she's extremely intrigued.)
“what are you here for? there’s no way you broke into my apartment for no reason.” jihyo probes, and she says it with such authority that it kind of makes you nervous, her tone makes you tense—it's kind of hot.
“the lizard thing,” you mutter, “i wasn’t there in time to stop him from hurting all those people.”
there’s a sudden guilt that takes over—the whole mood of the room shifts slightly, but you compose yourself even as your jaw tenses. the floor suddenly looks a bit more appealing now because you’re doing anything to not look at the detective before you, feeling at fault.
“you can’t save all of them, i know how it feels.” jihyo mutters softly, her voice is deeply comforting and you fold a bit. “did you manage to do anything about that giant reptile?”
“no, but i think i know what it is, and how it, well… how it turned into that."
“what? i honestly thought it was a science experiment gone wrong, maybe some lizard accidentally drank something, i don't know, i'm not a scientist. i was actually going to ask the chief's niece since she’s a science genius, very smart.” jihyo shrugs. your mood is lifted again after being complimented, after hearing the words "science genius."
she thinks of your alter ego like that? well, technically spiderwoman is your alter ego, not that nerdy minatozaki industries employee. you hold back a snicker.
“you’re not one hundred percent wrong on the science experiment part, i guess.”
“can you just get to the point?” jihyo groans.
“alright alright,” you make your way over to jihyo, standing slightly closer to the tired detective and leaning against the wall. “i’m this way because i’m technically a science experiment gone wrong, but at least i’m not a hideous monster. anyway, i got bit by this spider, it wasn’t a normal one, it was more of a science experiment that turned me into one.”
jihyo quirks a brow. “so you’re actually a spider?”
“well, no detective.” you scoff, “do i look like i have eight legs? well if i were a guy maybe i’d have three-”
“i hate you.” jihyo complains, “so much.”
“sorry sorry, it was funny.” you joke (you have the humor of a thirteen-year-old). “anyway, that spider basically lets me shoot webs out of my wrists, climb walls, stick to things, a sixth sense? hmm, i think i'm missing something...oh! i can turn invisible too-”
“you can what?” jihyo says in utter disbelief. you just keep surprising her more and more with every word that escapes your mouth.
“i can turn invisible yeah yeah whatever, it's cool i guess—but that’s enough about me. what i'm trying to say is that i’m a science experiment gone right and that lizard is one that went wrong.”
“harsh," she murmurs, but she's entertained by your amusing little explanation, "but how so? how do you know you won't go wrong?” and now jihyo’s really interested in your little backstory.
“that's a harsh way to put it detective." you pout, but continue nonetheless. "well, i didn’t turn into a spider and i ended up with some fun little abilities. this guy must’ve gotten bitten by a lizard or something? i don’t know, but instead of getting some cool fun powers, he became the lizard. i’d be crying on the ground if i were a were-lizard, must suck.” you finally explain. jihyo giggles at your last little remark.
“so what do you think we can do? how does this help at all?” the detective’s head tilts, and you think to yourself, humming for added effect.
“it’s probably like a werewolf, just without the full moon. maybe it will turn back to normal again?"
“and what if it’s permanent?” jihyo adds.
you shake your head, “a giant lizard can’t fit into many places without being noticed.” you respond, “i think if i can lure it or something, maybe even capture it with my webs—we can wait for it to change back: we can stop it from killing any others.”
jihyo nods and you both take a moment to consider.
the detective’s face lights up as she figures out a plan, and she almost laughs thinking about how this is everything the chief had told her not to do. she didn’t care though, this was the best option, the most effective one (and she also just wanted an excuse to work with you more often).
“there’s going to be a ceremony soon for that incident, three days from now i think. i bet you that lizard is going to sabotage it.”
“elaborate,”
jihyo's brows crease again, “half the police force is going to be there, including some civilians. if i were a hungry, ugly, big reptile, i think'd target that for sure.”
“glad you’re not a reptile because who knows what you’re capable of.” and jihyo scoffs at your response. “you’d probably be a small reptile though.” you exaggerate that last remark by putting your hand out, pretending to compare your height with her; detective park narrows her eyes again, and you think she might consider turning you in soon.
“how can i let you know when to show up? what if you’re not there in time again?”
you shrug your shoulders. “i’ll be there. i have my ways.”
“you’re so ominous it’s annoying.” park scoffs,
“just admit that you want to take me out on a date, i know you want to know more~ i mean personally, i’m up for it.” you smirk. "what about something simple, a coffee date? i'm a latte person-"
“i’ll take you out and turn you in soon,” she scoffs. you simply laugh at her response and make your way to the opened window to leave, much to jihyo’s disappointment (she kind of (really) enjoyed your stupid flirting and company).
“it’s a date then?” the tone of your voice is filled with hope, excitement, and wonder. your tone is extremely inviting. “maybe you can undress me after since you've seemed so eager,” you add with a chuckle. "i'm not against skipping to that part."
jihyo is about to get up to actually chastise you, even if her cheeks are flushed and her heart skips a beat. she really can’t believe you’re putting the image of a naked spiderwoman in her head right now, she doesn’t even know who you are or what you look like under that suit and mask—except for the bottom half of your face—but fuck you're really making her want to.
you leave before she can do anything, or even respond.
-
“dear, you have to come, it’s respectful and i know you’re free today.”
how the hell are you supposed to swing in to save the day as spiderwoman at the ceremony when you’re also being forced to sit near the big, buff chief and his highest-ranking men?
as much as you’d like to argue, you really can’t win this argument because that would make you sound like a really big asshole for not attending a ceremony for the injured and dead. would you be a bigger asshole for not being able to save them at that same ceremony? you’ll figure it out (you hope).
you’re not able to win an argument with the 6’4 tall, incredibly built chief of police, you'd never be able to in this type of situation.
now, you stand in front of the mirror buttoning up a white dress shirt to cover the little spider-shaped device that turns into a suit. the person in the mirror is looking at you with eyes that say “please don’t fuck this up”
you stare back with a look that responds: “trying my best.”
how the hell are you going to be two people at the same time, same place, while being near the people who hate your guts?
-
the venue is this random building a couple of minutes down the street from the police station.
various tables with white cloth surrounded by brown chairs are scattered across the room; there are already people dispersed across the room in their respective areas, chatting with each other. your uncle leaves your side and decides it’s okay to leave you in a place filled with strangers, great.
as you wander around the room some people seem to recognize you by the way they greet you so warmly. various people who you’ve seen once, or maybe twice greet you formally; you blame your uncle for why you’re being treated like someone with slight authority.
you’re finally alone about ten minutes later at the drink station and you fill your plastic cup with some iced lemon water. it’s a little less overwhelming in the mellow corner, away from the people who are a little too lively for the reason it’s even being held.
“hey.” a voice says, and you flinch, spilling some water on the dress shirt you have on. jihyo stands there next to you after tapping on your shoulder and making you look like a fool.
you pat down your shirt with the napkin on the table, “hi.” you respond, trying to sound a little leveled.
“did i scare you? sorry about the shirt, let me help.”
“just startled, haha.” you wish you could be as smooth as spiderwoman would in this interaction. jihyo helps you out by grabbing a napkin and patting at your chest, she’s literally patting near your boobs and your face is probably red from the way she does it so obliviously. spiderwoman would probably, no–she'd definitely be making a comment about jihyo wanting to be near your chest–something like that.
“so, how is everything so far?”
“it’s just really strange.” you sigh, finally patting down the button up dry, there’s just a big patch of water that hasn’t dried off yet. “i feel a little too respected.”
jihyo laughs and you feel a smile tugging at your lips.
“well, if i didn’t know your uncle as personally as i do now–i’d probably be the same.” jihyo confesses. “your uncle can be scary.” and she exaggerates the last remark by widening her eyes and raising her brows slightly. you laugh.
“and if you didn’t know me personally?”
“well, i’d be a bit skeptical of how this tall, striking woman had spilled water all over her chest just from me tapping on her shoulder.” jihyo jokes.
“you think i’m striking?” and you send her a grin. the grin sends a shiver down her spine and the detective pauses in her place as she watches the way your lips curl, almost identical to the vigilante's stupid grin. jihyo is a bit shaken up from the similarity and it takes her a bit to respond.
“a little.” she admits.
ever since you had met jihyo, something in that interaction sparked a casual friendship. a friendship that was so similar to one between people who had known each other in college, or maybe something close to that.
it always started with comforting, regular greetings, and there wasn't any awkward small talk. there was slight joking here and there, some teasing remarks, small ‘gossip’ about your uncle and anyone else that you two knew. it was a refreshing and friendly relationship that you had with jihyo—even some mutual attraction; in fact, you’re the reason jihyo had been hesitant to flirt with spiderwoman, she would be lying if she said she didn’t have a slight crush on you—though it could never work out—your uncle would kill her (probably).
“you know what my uncle said to me earlier? he’s a strange one.”
“and what was it?”
“he told me to sock any guy that tried to ask me out, it’s so weird.” and it really is, because everyone here is present for the events that took place a couple of days ago. why would it be someone’s first instinct to ask out the niece of the chief?
jihyo laughs at your remark, shaking her head. “honestly, i’d listen to him. the guys in the force that are single can be pretty strange.”
you nod in agreement, “yeah… what was his name… mark? he asked me out with the worst pickup line i’ve ever heard. something like ‘usually coffee is the thing that wakes up my senses, you seem like you’d wake them up too.’ the laugh i had to hold back…”
jihyo laughs upon hearing that very amusing information (which, she’ll likely use against her colleague). “he’s like that.”
the conversation is cut short when you hear the noise of someone tapping against a microphone. a familiar voice is heard throughout the room, it’s one of the sergeants who had welcomed you so warmly: taeyong. the guy seemed young for his position, maybe 3-4 years older than you, all you knew was that he was young for someone so highly ranked.
he cleared his throat before speaking. “welcome everyone. we’d like to thank every guest for attending.”
jihyo taps your shoulder and tilts her head to signal you to a table, just so you two can look like you’re listening. the two of you pull chairs out and sit at a small, round table that seems to be unoccupied. jihyo scans the room subtly, there was one thought that had been occupying her mind the entire time she had been in the venue: where is spiderwoman?
the detective knew that the lizard showing up wasn’t necessarily guaranteed, but she sort of wished it were. she wanted to see you, even if it meant a giant lizard barging in.
park jihyo should not be thinking of this. maybe the chief thought you could've been a bad influence, jihyo believes you might be a terrible one with how she's thinking right now.
-
taeyong had been finishing up his speech, that’s about the same time the low, goosebump-inducing rumble was heard and felt.
the entire building trembled.
jihyo looks around frantically, this should be your cue to show up, this should be your time to swing in and piss off the officers.
this should be the time she gets to see you again.
to be fair, you had shown up, just not as your little arachnid alter ego. just yourself, though jihyo didn’t know that.
the building shudders again and overwhelms all your senses, and everyone in the room. goosebumps creep up your back, and your so-called “sixth sense” starts acting up.
all the guests who had been in the venue started to chatter quietly; hushed whispers and sudden panic filled the room. the building shakes again and everyone seems to get the message that this isn’t normal, that something is happening and the fact that they don’t know what the hell is happening disturbs them greatly. worry and fear start to crowd the room when a piece of the ceiling falls, it makes you instinctively scan the room—keeping your guard up.
“y/n,” jihyo mutters. she’s observing the space with her narrowed eyes, the other cops seem to overlook with caution too. “stay close.”
“what’s going on?” you question, but you know the answer to your query as soon as another piece of the ceiling falls over and splits into pieces, leaving some dust. jihyo looks at you for a second, panic and worry in her eyes. all you can think is: i need to get out of this damn place.
taeyong turns around and as soon as he does the wall in front of him completely breaks down. the enormous (and really ugly) lizard invites itself in, emerging (more like barging and breaking in). taeyong falls back, no, he's practically flung away from where he was before; he lands with a blunt thud.
terror fills the room completely. jihyo’s eyes widen at the sight of taeyong on the floor, some blood seeping out of him as he lies there hardly conscious.
the guests scream and run towards the exits while the officers pull out their guns hurriedly and point them at the lizard in sight, their hands quiver and their bodies tremble in fear from just seeing this unbelievable monster.
you gulp at the sight, it really is an enormous lizard, maybe ten feet tall. the lizard was an ugly, swamp-green shade, it’s really disgusting to look at and its eyes are something out of a nightmare–gross.
the spider-shaped device under your button-up practically calls out your name, it’s almost screaming in your ear “press me! press me!” and as much as you’d like to listen to it so you could magically turn into a so-called “hero,” you can’t risk people knowing, especially not the cops that are scattered around.
you’re hidden from a few cops, though it would definitely be noticeable if some random suit had been wrapping around you out of nowhere, someone would notice. despite the commotion that goes on and the panic that's heard from various screams and whimpers, someone would certainly notice the chief’s niece turning into the “friendly neighborhood spiderwoman!”
and that wouldn’t be good, especially if your uncle found out.
there are two options: run away with jihyo and let her find out about your little secret, or let people die. you don't have much time to think—or plan for that matter—maybe you can risk letting jihyo know, it’s about time. it’s your last resort anyway,
shit.
a groan leaves your mouth and you scan the room impatiently—there are broken chairs, tables, and debris all over—you’re trying to think of how you’ll escape this very inconvenient situation. you spot the sign that says “restrooms” from the corner of your eye and quickly pull jihyo by the arm, rushing over. jihyo’s expression turns into one of surprise and confusion, she looks at you with worry and furrowed brows while you drag her, almost debating whether she should fight against your grip on her.
“what the hell are you doing?” jihyo questions, looking at you distressed as she hears a sudden high-pitched scream and another sharp, loud sound from outside. your fingers work at the button-up you wear, and jihyo quickly turns away as you do so, “y/n? what the hell is wrong with you? why are you stripping now? we have to help-”
“fuck, jihyo.” you mutter, and you give up as you rip the dress shirt open, showing your bra-covered chest. this is not the time for jihyo to be checking you out right now, but shit, your body is like a magnet—one with toned abs and an incredibly satisfying physique that pulls her look towards it. you glance at the quivering bathroom door and continue, “i can’t explain everything now, but i swear i will soon, and please don’t get mad at me. there’s too much going on and i just, i have to go.”
“what the hell do you-” jihyo starts, but her question is quickly answered as you press on the spider logo.
your suit stems out from it and covers your body in seven fleeting seconds. the familiar suit covers your body, and she realizes it's you. her eyes widen and her mouth opens slightly, she looks at you in such shock and nearly stumbles back.
“i told you i’d be here,” you say. jihyo is left speechless, though she manages to choke out a broken, stuttered response to your "big reveal."
“y/n, you- what the hell?”
“let’s talk later yeah? help gather the people that aren’t cops, bring them somewhere safe,” you say, and jihyo is still baffled by everything that just happened at the last minute. you put a hand on her shoulder and start again. “jihyo?”
“you can't just, you can't just leave like that? you can't-”
"i have to help them, detective," you say. your eyes lock with hers as if they could convey a certain understanding.
"god y/n, you... you have to explain everything, i swear to god." she manages to sputter out. you nod at her,
"it's a date then, on me." you joke, trying to lighten the mood and calm her nerves so she can assist you in dealing with this situation. now jihyo knows it's really you. the detective watches you leave the bathroom quickly, though you stop at the door to give her a small thumbs up before departing.
jihyo is at a loss for words—she's not even sure if all her senses are working properly. there's too much to process, but the detective has to do her job, she has to try and save these people, she's going to do what you told her to do.
detective park can do this, detective park can overcome anything, detective park can do her job and compose herself—so that's what she does, and she's completely disregarding whatever the chief had said a couple of days prior:
jihyo is going to work with spiderwoman, she's going to do what spiderwoman says.
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My Fathers Daughter pt 10
A different perspective
Dick Grayson has always been used to being the first.
He was the first Robin, the first son, the first to be picked for almost anything.
Hell he was the first child as far as he knew. So imagine his surprise when he finds out his mother not only has a whole secret daughter, but one that she completely abandoned.
He could still hardly believe it.
He couldn't stop thinking about the night they found out about her. The look on Christine's face, it was one he's never seen before. The look of shock and almost disbelief, like she had seen a ghost.
In a way she did.
The ghost of the life she left behind with Tony and Y/n Stark. Now Christine was trying so desperately to revive it. As if she didn't murder it with her own hands. And while Dick himself had reservations with these actions, Christine was his mother before anything, and he was going to help her no matter what.
So here he was, standing outside the bedroom of his mothers long lost daughter, trying to figure out something to say. It shouldn't be too hard, seeing as Jason of all people managed to get you to open up.
And yet, here he is. Unable to muster up the courage to simply knock on the door.
"This is fucking ridiculous", Dick thinks to himself, "Just knock, what's the worst that can happen?"
Lost in his own thoughts, Dick didn't notice the shadow under the door, and was startled by the sudden swing of it opening and you standing there.
"I can hear your thinking over my music." You said a little annoyed," Is there something I can do for you or...?"
Dick blinked trying to gather all of his thoughts, he really didn't know what to say to you. This is the first time you've said more than three syllables to him.
You stared back, face revealing how uncomfortable you were getting with this prolonged eye contact.
"Riiiight, so im just gonna" You say taking steps to shut the door in his face
"Wait!" The raven haired man shouts, "Wait, please."
You stop with a sigh and open the door, inviting him in, " Alright, come on."
Dick walks in, looking around at the room that actually used to be his when he first moved in.
He mentions as much trying to break the awkward silence.
"Hm, and you were okay staying in a room that was copied from a dracula movie?" You say snarkily
"Well to be fair I was 12 and watched my parents die in front of me, I wasn't really looking at the decor." He says half joking.
You made a face and looked away, feeling even more awkward.
"Anyways, I just wanted to you know...see how you were settling in" Dick starts, " Its been a few months and it feels like we hardly even see you."
You pause, thinking of what to say. But before you even have a chance to say anything Dick continues.
"You know, moms really excited that you're here." He starts, " Honestly I don't think I've ever seen her this excited over anything. She's usually very level headed."
You stare at him
"I mean, you know how she is I suppose she is your mother too."
You stare
"I know she probably really missed you, she gets lonely sometimes you know? Everyone here usually has their own thing going on and we don't really get to see her as much."
Nothing from you
" Well, I guess she see's Damian more than any of us but that's because he's basically her baby."
Okay...that hurt
"I mean, I think he was the youngest when he came to use, I think he was like nine or something. And he was not the easiest to get along with. So don't worry that he hasn't warmed up to you yet."
You hum, already irritated with this conversation.
"He's also really protective of our mom, she's done alot to make sure their relationship is as good as it is." he says offhandedly, " Actually she's done it for all of us."
"Oh really?" You ask with no real intrest.
"Yeah! I remember one time when I was little she always made it a point to spend time with me even though she was so busy." He says fondly.
You decide to play along and remince on the memories that you buried long ago.
"You know, when I was younger, Christine used to take me out of school and take me to see ballet shows." You say with a slight smile, " I was in classes back then and loved watching the older girls dance."
Dick smiled, feeling as if he made some progress with you, " Really? I think she actually takes Cassie and Steph to those sometimes, you should ask to tag along I'm sure she'll love it."
You cringe, feeling another needle in your heart. Not even your memerioes were sacred.
"Yeah no thanks." You reply harshly, " I don't like ballet anymore."
Dick pauses, shocked at the sudden shift in atmosphere.
"I--"
And before he can say anything you cut him off, feigning a yawn
"Hey look, not that I don't love our little chats, but I am beat."
"Oh! right, sorry I guess it is getting a bit late.."Dick say hopping up from your bed and walking to the door, " Y/n, you know its really nice talking to you. You should try and open up more."
You smile sarcastically, " you know, something you and mother have in common is that you both like talking at me, not to me."
And with that you shut the door, promptly ending the conversation and sending Dick spiraling.
In fact, the statement bothered him so much that he went seeking a second opinion.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Yeah... I don't know how to help you man."
"Oh come on! Jason, you and her are like...bosom buddies or something."
"Bosom buddies? How old are you?" Jason scoffs, " Look, what you and everyone here doesn't understand is that Y/n has a family waiting for her. She's not going to except mom as her mom because her mom is still alive and well."
"But...technically our mom is her mom." Dick says hesitantly, " And if I were her I'd be thrilled to have my mom back."
"Dick. Your mom didn't abandon you for a different family." Jason says annoyed he's not getting it, "What the hell is wrong with you, you're usually so level headed about this stuff?"
Dick pauses.
To be honest he doesn't know why he's being so hard headed about the whole situation.
He knows that he doesn't like seeing his mother sad, and lately seeing her face when you reject every move she maked to make amends is heartbreaking to him.
That was his mother. The woman who took him in as her own when his biological parents died.
The same woman that stayed by his side no matter how moody, rude, and bratty he first acted when he first arrived. She took his grief on as her own and basically put him back together along with Bruce. He can still remember the night he considered her his mother.
He had just started out as Robin, and had just got back from patrol. It was a rough night.
First, it was the middle of autumn and raining heavily, he and Bruce weren't getting along this particular night and he overall was just having a bad night. So needless to day he was a little rougher with the baddies he was fighting tonight.
Bruce had already reprimanded him throughout the night about his unnecessary force but Dick did not want to hear it. It got so bad that Dick was just going off own his own without Batmans orders, and thats where the trouble began.
Dick had jumped the gun again, throwing himself into a fight with some drug dealers , not realizing that there were one too many for a fourteen year old to handle by himself. They quickly overpowered him, and ganged up on the poor boy.
He was given quite the beating before Batman caught up to him and basically saved him.
In pain and with a bruised ego, he had to listen to yet another lecture from the irritated (actually extremely worried) dark knight, and one from Alfred who was also extremely worried while he cleaned up the child.
He has finally marched to his room in a huff and after he shut the door, was finally able to reveal in the fact that he almost died. He was lost in thought, finally feeling the fear and pain in every move he made as he tried to crawl under the covers when he heard a knock on the door.
In she came, with a tray of goodies she personally made,staying home from a business trip he had known she was going to go on. She crawled into the bed with him, held him to her chest and allowed him to cry.
"You may be a big brave superhero" She said to him, " But here in this home, you're my son. My baby, and you are allowed to cry if you need to. I won't judge you. I won't say a word."
And he did. He cried.
He cried because he was hurting. He cried because he was angry. Angry because he was beat up. Because he was lectured all night. Because he missed his parents.
But most of all, because he felt as if he was forgetting them. He was having such a good time at the Wayne manor, grew to love the Waynes as the parents they intended to be to him. He felt as if he was betraying his parents. The parents that had raised him up to that point.
And here he was, laying cuddled up to Christine the same way he would with his mother. But at this point the two of them are blurring together, to the point where he can't tell where his mother ends and Christine starts.
This woman, took him in and wrapped him in love.
Love that he thought he would never feel again after that tragic night.
A love that, he honestly cannot imagine never having.
It was something that he couldn't begin to repay her. He wouldn't know how. Where to start.
Rekindling his mother with the daughter she lost. Gave up.
That was the least he could do. He'd do it for her.
But, after the conversation he had with Jason, he went home and thought about it. Actually really thought about it.
The year he came into the Wayne's lives, Christine stopped going on her business trips.
Not all at once, but she would push them back.
Usually because Dick had needed her.
She pushed her trips back until eventually, she just stopped going.
She hadn't said much, just saying that she realized that she was needed at home more than they needed her over there. But even at that age, Dick noticed she was sad. She kept her composure around the family, but once Dick had seen her crying in a pantry deleting something off her phone.
He had thought it was weird but after a few months she was okay.
No crying, no sadness.
And... now that he thinks about it. While he was being wrapped up in love there was another child in New York, who's life was being completely unraveled. All because of him.
And maybe...the reason he was trying so hard to rekindle you and Christine wasn't really because of Christine.
But because since that night, the night you were revealed to be her daughter, he did the math. And he just wanted to give you back the mother he unknowingly stole away from you.
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#marvel x reader#avengers x teen!reader#dick grayson x reader#jason todd x reader#tony stark x daughter!reader#bruce wayne x daughter!reader#x reader#reader insert#dc comics x reader#marvel#batfam#batfam x batsis#batfam x reader
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Dad’s best friend
Summary: After quitting your job and finding your boyfriend in bed with another woman, you decide to go back home for a while to recharge.
Bucky Barnes x female reader
Word count: 3,017
Warnings: NSFW. MInors DNI. P in V, age gap (reader is in her 20′s), oral (male receiving),
A/N: Likes and reblogs are always appreciated!! Any feedback is welcome. All mistakes are my own.
------------------------------------------
It has been a hell of a week at work, well more like ever since you started working there. You finally had it with your boss and told her to stick her job up her ass and that you quit. Packing your stuff and heading home, you decided to stop in at your boyfriend's place to tell him you did what you wanted to do for so long. Maybe he would feel sorry for you and buy you some dinner. When you got to his apartment, his door was a jar and you instantly thought he had been broken into. Slowly you pushed the door open, nothing was out of place and everything looked fine. Then you heard some noise coming from the bedroom. Walking towards the door and swinging it open you see your boyfriend in bed with another woman. Talk about the final nail in the coffin.
Storming out of his apartment and heading back to your place, closing the door behind you and sinking to the floor "Fuck! What the fuck is happening!?". Pulling yourself together, getting off the floor, and deciding to get rid of the pictures you have around your place until you found a family photo. Your mom, dad, and your older brother. It's the only place you wanted to be right now so you give your dad a call.
"Hey, dad! I was wondering if I could move back home for a bit?"
"Of course honey! We would love to have you home! Is everything okay?"
"Thanks, dad, I'll tell you everything when I get there. I'm gonna pack a few things and then I'll be on my way. Love you. See you soon!"
In minutes you had your bag packed and you were on your way home. This will be just what you needed, going back to your roots. Fresh start. The drive home was relaxing, you listened to music the whole way, loudly. Your now ex never liked the radio up loud in the car. Everything was under your rules now and there was no turning back! It wasn't a long trip home, just about 3 hour drive. All your childhood memories came flooding back as you drove into the neighborhood. Flashbacks to riding your bike along with your childhood friend. As you pulled into the driveway, turning your car off, your dad was already waiting for you at the door with a big smile on his face. Running to him and wrapping your arms around him.
"Thanks for letting me come home"
"You're allowed to come home whenever you need to honey, no questions asked"
Heading inside to the kitchen, your dad made you some tea and a snack.
"It will be just you and I for a few days. Your mom is having a few nights out with her friends"
"That's okay, I'm glad she's out having fun. Did you have anything planned while she was gone?"
"No, just the regular night in with Bucky, drinks, and whatever sport is on. Or we will play poker. He will be over tomorrow evening and he sometimes stays. You don't mind?"
"Not at all dad, I don't mind at all. It will be nice to see Bucky again. Haven't seen him since I left for college. Wow, that's a long time ago"
It was true, you hadn't seen Bucky in years. You always had a teenage crush on him. You couldn't help but think how he looks now. Putting your cup and plate away then heading upstairs to your old room. Everything was just as you left it. You were exhausted from the trip and telling your dad everything that happened. Just wanting to sleep and forget about this whole day. Climbing into bed and falling asleep as soon as your head hit the pillow.
_____**______
The next morning, you woke up to the smell of bacon. Heading downstairs and heading into the kitchen to see your dad made a full breakfast, eggs, bacon, and pancakes. He remembered just how to cheer you up after everything that's happened.
"Good morning honey! Just making some coffee. Take a seat, pancakes are almost done"
"Thank you, dad, you didn't have to you know"
"Shh, I'm just happy to have you home with me" You smile and start eating your eggs and bacon then your dad brings over the pancakes.
"So, what time is Bucky coming over?"
"He comes over at around 7. I was thinking your car could do with a wash, wanna help after we're done here?"
"Sure, dad! But don't you have to -"
"I don't mind at all but take your time, and make sure you eat" You smile again and go back to eating. Then grabbing some coffee. Looking out the back window, watching your dad get everything ready to start washing your car. You head upstairs and change and meet him out there.
You both spent most of the afternoon washing your car, you couldn't help but mess with your dad throwing water at him but he knew you were just having some fun. He wanted you to have that big smile on your face.
"Do you want me to go out for a few hours so you can have your guy's night tonight?"
"No honey, you don't have to leave. We spend most of the night in the living room. You won't be bothering us"
"Okay, well I'll just have my dinner and head upstairs, watch a couple of movies"
"You could always join us if you want"
"Then it wouldn't be boy's night" You laugh.
"I'm gonna head in and get cleaned up" Dropping your bucket and sponge, you head inside and upstairs to shower.
After your shower, you headed back downstairs to make yourself some dinner. After the day you had yesterday, this called for a big bowl of pasta. Just as you sat down at the kitchen island to eat, the doorbell rang "Oh hon, that's Buck. Will you let him in, please? I'll be there in a minute."
"Sure!" Getting up and going to answer the door. When you open the door you see a very handsome man standing before you. He looks older, you can see the bits of grey in his beard.
"Hi, Bucky!"
He stands there mouth hanging open as he looks at you.
"Y/N What are you doing home? Did your dad cancel? I didn't get a message or anything."
"No, he didn't cancel Bucky. I didn't want to interrupt your night. Come on in, I'm sure you know where the living room is"
"Thanks, doll, you didn't answer my question though," He says as he walks past you and turns to look at you.
"What are you doing home? Something happen? Are you okay?"
"I just needed some time, I'm okay" It's like he can sense that something has happened, you didn't want to get into it again though and you didn't want him feeling sorry for you.
"Dad will be with you in a few minutes, I'm going back to the kitchen to eat my food before it goes cold. See you later."
Heading back into the kitchen and sitting back at the island. You could see Bucky come in seconds after you and put his beers in the fridge. You have your back turned to him but you can feel his eyes on you. Sitting there, eating your dinner, scrolling through your phone till you see him out the corner of your eye, then he is in full view and leans against the kitchen counter.
"So, I haven't seen you since you left town with that boyfriend of yours for your new job" He smiles. "Yeah, a long time ago, and now I don't have either of them"
"What?"
"New start. No more assholes"
He moves beside you at the island placing his hand on your shoulder. "Are you okay baby girl?"
"Yeah Bucky, I'm fine" You give him a sweet smile and move off your chair, leaving your plate in the sink.
"Cause you know I'll take care of him, just give me the word"
Moving over to him and placing your hand on his cheek and kissing him on his other cheek, then looking into his eyes. You feel his hand placed on your hip. "No need Bucky, He's already miserable without me". Where is this confidence coming from? He smiles and you leave to go back to your room.
A little while has passed and you're sitting comfortably on your bed looking through the job section on your laptop. You could hear them downstairs laughing and shouting at the TV, well mostly your dad shouting but you could hear Bucky laughing too and it made you smile. Then the daydreaming started. Thinking about back into the kitchen after kissing his cheek, leaning in again, and kissing his lips. It left tingles all over your body. Your phone ringing pulled you out of your daydream, it was your brother.
"Hello?"
"Hey Y/N you at your apartment? Need a place to crash for the night. Had a couple of drinks, can't drive"
"No, I'm back at mom and dad's, don't go to my apartment"
"Why?"
"Long story"
"Okay, um, can you get dad on the phone please?"
"Yeah, sure, give me a minute". Hopping off your bed, you made your way downstairs and gave your phone to your dad. He left the room and you turned to Bucky.
"Having a good evening?"
You noticed his eyes on your legs, then his eyes snapped up to yours. You had forgotten that you changed into something more comfortable to lounge around in. Just an oversized shirt of your dad's. Bucky smirks at you.
"What?"
"You look good in my t-shirt sweetheart"
"Oh, this is yours? Thanks, it's nice and comfy" Your dad comes back into the room.
"Honey, I have to go pick your brother up and take him home. I'll be about an hour or more till I get back. Rain check Bucky?"
"Um, dad?"
"Yeah, honey?"
"Can Bucky stay? I don't wanna be alone"
"You mind Buck?"
"Not at all, I'll stay till you get back"
"Thanks, I'll be as quick as I can"
"Drive safe!"
He grabs his keys and heads out the door. "Can I get you a beer doll?"
"Sure, that would be nice" He gets up and heads to the kitchen to grab one for you while you take a seat on the couch. He comes back into the living room handing you your beer. "Thanks, Bucky, sorry your boy's night got ruined"
He sits beside you on the couch. "It's okay doll there's not a whole log going on anyway" He stretches his arm over the back of the couch behind you "So you gonna tell me what happened?"
"Why?"
"Well, do I need to beat him up?"
"He's definitely not worth it. I just need to get the strength to get my stuff out of that apartment"
"I can help you with that"
"That would be nice Buck. God I don't even wanna see him"
"You won't have to doll. Tell me what he did."
"I came home from work after an awful day and told my boss to stick her job up her ass"
"Good, I'm proud of you"
"Thanks" You smile sweetly at him and then it fades. "When I got to his apartment, I found him in bed with a tall blonde. She was everything I'm not. I left, and decided to come home"
"I'm glad you did sweetheart, you don't need that"
"Yeah, been thinking about going blonde"
"Don't you dare, do not change because of that asshole."
Looking at him and smiling, your eyes moving from his lips to his eyes and back to his lips again, leaning in and kissing his lips softly. "Um, what was that for doll?"
"Just shut up and kiss me James" Placing your hands around his neck and kissing him deeply then he pushes you away gently.
"Sweetheart we can't do this, your dad will kill me"
"Who's gonna tell him?" He looks at you surprised
"A-are you sure?"
"Yes James, show me how a real man treats a woman" Bucky leans back in, his lips crashing against yours in a bruising kiss. You don't waste any time and slip your panties off from under your oversized shirt and climbed onto his lap, kissing him deeply and grinding against his jeans. He's already hard, you feel him through his jeans.
"Well, you don't waste any time getting hard huh?"
"Oh baby, I've been rock hard ever since you opened the front door to let me in"
Wasting no time and undoing his jeans and zip, reaching in and wrapping your hand around his cock. Bucky's head falls back on the couch as you slowly stroke him. His tip already leaking pre cum. Wping it with your thumb and bringing it to your mouth and moaning at the taste. "Shit baby girl, you're killing me here. You not gonna let me taste you?"
Taking your other hand and bringing it to your core and pushing two fingers inside yourself, taking them out and rubbing the tip of his cock through your folds and lining him up. Pushing your fingers into his mouth as you slip down on his cock, both of you moaning together. Your reaction had both pleasure and pain. Bucky was bigger than your ex, the sting adding to the pleasure as he slipped in more. He left you to take control so that he doesn't hurt you. He was sucking on your fingers greedily and moaning at the taste of your pussy.
Bucky pulls you closer to him, pulling your shirt up and moving your bralet, taking your nipple into his mouth. You hissed at the feeling and he did the same with your other nipple and gently biting at your skin. Pulling his head up and kissing him again as his hands now rest on your hips. Looking into his eyes, you start to move your hips back and forth, gently at first. Once your pain had stopped from the stretch of his cock, you were overwhelmed with pleasure. He let you have control, and you gently rocked back and forth on his cock. You couldn't help moaning "F-Fuck Bucky!"
Leaning your head back as he attacks your neck with kisses as he lifts his hips to meet yours, pushing his cock deeper.
"Your pussy feels so fucking good doll, so fucking tight and perfect"
"I'm close Bucky! I'm gonna cum!"
"Cum all over my cock baby it's all yours"
His hands help you move back and forth on his cock. His fingertips dig into your skin as you move. He moans against your skin as your pussy tightens around him
"Fuck! Oh, FUCK!"
Moaning against his lips as you kiss him, his hands still on your hips moving you back and forth on him. Your body jerks, coming down from the high.
Pushing your hair out of your face, he looks deep into your eyes. "Are you okay?" All you can do is nod. Bucky's hands move from your hips to your back as he kisses you passionately as he moves to lay you down on the couch, grabbing one of the cushions to lay your head on. You both smile at one another while exchanging kisses. His hand moves down your side holding your hip, once again as he holds you in place as he pushes his cock into you again. Your breath hitches as you feel the stretch again. You knew from this moment that no one else would give you this feeling. Bucky slowly out and back in again. He grunts softly as he fills you. "Bucky, faster, please"
His movements pick up, he's hitting a new spot and you can't help moaning. Your moans fill the room. Wrapping your legs around his waist pulling him closer. Sneaking your hand down between your bodies and starting to massage your clit. Bucky grabs your hand and holds it to the couch. His hips move faster, the sound of skin slapping and both of you moaning filling the living room.
"I'm getting close doll, I'm gonna pull out though okay?"
"No, please don't, I'm on the pill. Please don't stop I'm so close again"
He buries his head in the crook of your neck as his movements become a little sloppy.
"Yes, Bucky! Right there oh god fuck!" You moan as your orgasm washes over you. Your pussy clenching around his cock as you come sending Bucky into his own orgasm.
He moans into your neck as his movements become slower. Bringing his head back up and kissing you softly, then he rests his head against yours and you both smile. You don't know how long you have been there on the couch but you don't want it to end. Never thought this would be your happy ending to the week you've had. Then you see headlights shine through the window and car doors closing, your dad and your brother laughing.
"Shit! they're back! I gotta go upstairs!" You get up quickly fix your shirt and run out the door and to the stairs. Bucky quickly fixes himself up and runs behind you "This only a one-night thing?"
Turning to him quickly and kissing him.
"It doesn't have to be, I'll see you around" Smiling and then running upstairs. Bucky smiles and rubs the back of his head turning back into the living room. He sees your panties on the floor and quickly picks them up and shoves them into his pocket. Your dad comes inside "Hey Buck" You're still here?"
"Yeah, um, I gotta go though. Give me a call when you wanna have a game night or whatever" He quickly leaves your house and makes his way home.
A few hours later when everyone is asleep, you sneak downstairs to get Bucky's number from your dad’s phone and you send him a text.
"Hey, it's Y/N. Still wanna help me get my stuff from my apartment?"
#Bucky Barnes#bucky x reader#bucky x female reader#bucky fanfic#bucky barnes smut#bucky smut#dbf!bucky
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Until Dawn
A SMALL JOY: Josh Washington x fem!reader
Summary: Taking Dr Hill's advice, Josh and his lover go up to the lodge and look through all the things his sisters had left behind - after an interesting find she does her best to take his mind off the sadness he's experiencing.
Notes: English isn't my first language. I apologize for any mistake I may have made while I wrote this short story.
To be honest, Until Dawn is still one of my favourite horror games. Thanks to the game I found my favourite YouTube channel, my English improved a lot because I wanted to understand every word, and I have a huge crush on Rami Malek to this very day. Me and my friends were obsessed with him the time the game came out, and soon started to watch more of his work together.
Josh Washington was one of my first fictional crushes, I could defend him for years without getting tired and I drew him so many times I actually learned how to draw portraits correctly.
There's a gameplay I like to rewatch every year, because of the great memories I have connected to it. I always fall in love with Josh Washington once again - and thanks to that tradition, I started to write for him as well.
Warnings: a bit of swearing, mentioned depression and loss, mentioning the Washington sisters' disappearance and/or death
•••
° "(...) We would come up in the summer and we would have the best time. The whole family was there - mom, dad, my sisters. It was some serious competition out there on the big lawn... I don't know. Can't go back. New reality." °
She listens carefully, noticing every little pitch or drop in Josh's voice as he speaks - and as he puts down the baseball bat all she can think about is grabbing him and pulling him into a hug, a tight one, the kind that is both loving and comforting. She watches him, she examines his every little move and her heart aches every single time she finds a new sign of sadness.
She hates it.
She hates that look on his face. She hates that change in his voice. She hates that he feels alone. She hates that the whole case is making him go crazy. She hates that nothing is certain and he can't even grieve.
She hates that he had to change so much; that he had to become this depressed because of some stupid, messed up prank their friends had decided to pull on his sister.
He didn't deserve any of it. He doesn't deserve any of it. None of the Washington kids do.
Coming up here was already hard - back to the mountain where Hannah and Beth disappeared, where they played around like stupid teenagers do. Dr Hill said it's for the best - Josh needs some closure, some proof that he needs to slowly start to move on. She thinks it's bullshit - Josh thinks so too. It won't be easy to put yourself through something like this.
But regardless, they came. They are here now, looking through the rooms, the basement...
The memories are hurting her - and if she as a friend is hurting this badly than Josh must suffer a lot.
"Teach me." the words suddenly burst out before she can stop them, wanting to make Josh concentrate on something else - not wanting him to get lost in his own mind.
"What?" the question is loud in the basement.
"Teach me how to play." she continues on, feeling unsure like she tries to cross a very thin and sensitive line. "I've never played baseball before."
"It's been a while since I did so." Josh starts to explain, his gaze falling on the bat he put down. "You really- want to?"
She steps closer to him slowly, carefully, as if she tries to get close to a very scared and wounded animal. She touches his arm, her fingers hold him as her thumb brushes along his skin in an up and down motion. She leans towards him, her face touching his shoulder as she presses a kiss to the area what isn't covered by his t-shirt.
"You don't have to if you don't want to." she whispers. "I know it's not-" she holds that thought and says something else instead: "I just haven't seen you play yet and I want to join in."
Josh looks at her over his shoulder, he looks at her as she tries to smile even if her eyes stay sad. He watches her like she's the only thing he has left, like she's the only person who matters anymore. He looks at her and feels something break inside, realizing that she really is the only one who he has.
"All right." he says and when he sees her eyes change a tiny bit - showing a bit of happiness - he feels his heart flutter. It makes him feel better, it makes him want to touch her too, putting his hand over hers - over the one which is still clinging onto his arm. "As long as you promise me you won't accidentally hit yourself with the bat."
And there's what he wanted to see - her expression changes, playful offence takes the sadness' place and she gently hits his back.
"Hey! I wouldn't do that."
"You totally wouldn't." his sarcasm earns him another punch and despite the situation and the place, he feels like he got something back.
The last time they bickered like this was half a year ago, the night his sisters had disappeared. They drank and played around until they started to make out in the kitchen, only stopping when Chris stepped inside the room wanting some booze for himself.
As they climb the stairs hand in hand they both feel somewhat relieved. They found a kind of small joy, a bit of happiness - something what they had left here months ago. Josh chuckles when she trips and almost falls, she feels excited as he hands her the baseball bat outside.
"Since there're only the two of us here, I think it's best I teach you how to hit the ball and not yourself."
"I'm not that clumsy Mister!" she tries to sound offended, but it doesn't work.
"I know you too well, girl; and I don't trust you with that at all."
Josh stands behind her, keeping a gentle hold on both of her arms as he explains how to stand and how to hold the bat. She chuckles when he playfully tickles her and this time she doesn't feel guilty about laughing. Before he lets go of her to throw the ball, he gives her a short hug and presses a kiss into the crook of her neck.
She misses the first time...
and the second time; and the third time...
She misses and Josh laughs and she thinks it's the most beautiful sight she's ever seen.
They change positions after a while and no matter how she throws, Josh never misses - not even once. He hits the ball every single time and it flies and lands far away.
She has the feeling that in that very moment, doing that very thing they both feel somewhat complete. She feels like Josh's smiles are honest, his laughs are honest and she forgets about Dr Hill and his stupid advice.
"No shit you like to play it." she says after a while as the both of them are lying in the grass, her head resting on Josh's arm. "It is fun."
"Believe me darling, it is much more fun when you actually hit the ball." his voice has a teasing edge to it and for a moment she thinks about turning towards him and hitting him playfully once again - but she doesn't.
Instead - hoping to get something more, trying to get a kind of good change out of him, she says: "I will, after a bit more training. You'll teach me, I have no doubt about that."
Josh turns towards her, gently touching her face and playing with her hair. She tries to read his face and she realizes that he understands what she's playing at. She wonders if he'll get upset or sad... but she gets an answer pretty quickly.
"I will - of course I will. You'll be the best player in this damn country."
The muscles in her face twitch and she feels like she'll cry. It's been so long, so long since Josh smiled and laughed that now seeing it again feels like a whole new experience. She doesn't want to leave the place or the moment. It's too nice.
"Better than you?"
"Way better." he promises and lets go of the lock of hair he's been playing with. "I love you, you know that, right?"
She feels frozen at the question and starts to wonder where it's coming from. The doubt in his voice, the softness in his eyes... He deserves the world, he deserves everything in it and he deserves to know that he does enough for her - she feels his love and every single emotion and action it causes.
"Of course I do... I know." she promises. "I love you too. And I'm here for you, no matter what."
It's her turn to lean in and she kisses him, making sure the kiss is soft and calm. She wants to make him feel whole and safe. She wants him to be happy.
They lay back down and stay quiet for a bit, enjoying the sunlight and the light summer breeze. She feels like she could melt. Melt into the feeling and moment forever, without ever getting bored.
"You know," Josh starts suddenly, his voice soft and unsure. "it's been a while since I've taken you out on a date."
"It's fine, Josh. These past months weren't exactly the best."
"No... I know." for a few moments he stays silent, not knowing what to say. "All I want to say is I have a few movies here we can watch and we can have a nice time before we-"
"-go back to them." she finishes, understanding what he means.
Them. All the friends, all the family members and pals who show an annoying amount of pity. All of those people who try to comfort Josh when doesn't want to do anything with them. The people who make him feel worse than better.
"I'd love that." she smiles at him as he turns towards him and hugs him. "But no horror."
"No horror." Josh nods.
It wouldn't be good for either of them.
She kisses his shoulder as they get going, stretching their muscles, before climbing the stairs to go and find the movies Josh was talking about.
As they look over his DVDs while hugging, all she can think about is how unfair life is, because Josh doesn't deserve any of the problems life threw at him...
#until dawn#until dawn x reader#josh washington#josh washington x reader#josh washington x fem!reader#hannah washington#beth washington
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Wednesday: Part II
joel miller x fem!reader
Summary of the fic: For the last 5 years, every Wednesday you watched a handsome man walk by your street with a lilac bouquet in hands. Except he doesn't stroll on your street this Wednesday, he shows up at your grief support group. 🐾
read on AO3 | masterlist | previous chapter
Warnings: No outbreak AU, Grief and its implications, Reader lost her mom, Reader's mom has a name (but no physical description), Group therapy, Grief support group, Parent grief, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Slow Burn, Slow Build, Fluff, No use of y/n
Word count of the chapter: 3,6k
II. BUTTERCUPS
In how many boxes could you put your whole life? Your mom could do it in 12. There are 12 boxes in your living room, all about her. You’ve been ignoring it since the day you put everything inside them and said to yourself that you could do it in another moment when grief didn’t overwhelm you. It has been over 5 years.
You peaked the boxes here and there over the years, of course. You left part of them between your apartment storage and Grandpa’s house, who was much more in day with them. He gathered the memories, cleaned up the gunk and decided to hold on only to what it was personal — her handwritten recipes, the photo albums, her favorite record.
It was Henry’s idea to review all these boxes, he had helped his parents to move and leave his childhood house behind, including Sam’s room.
“I have my own place, Sam didn’t live with me, and look at how I’m doing. Thought my parents could move on easier if they didn’t have his bedroom waiting for him, you know? They cleaned up a bit after, you know, but his things were there still. I got to myself some of his comics and one of his action figures, everything else we donated.” He said to you last grief support group meeting while sipping coffee.
“How do you feel now?” You asked in a small voice.
“Like some weight left my shoulders, honestly. His stuff is just stuff, they aren’t him. The meaning behind it is what makes us cling to it. I prefer to have memories of him than have everything waiting for his return.”
You nodded in guilty of the boxes waiting for your review. If your mom didn’t accumulate so much while raising you, traveling, meeting people, maybe you wouldn’t be in this position of choosing which things you could keep.
“You should do it too, give it a try.” Henry smiled tightly and went to sit in the circle. You sighed and texted your uncle if he was free that weekend.
And here you are, with 12 boxes opened and ready for you. Uncle Michael has been an angel, trying to make this somewhat easier on you. After Grandpa, the family moved on quickly from it. They found themselves back on a routine, on their daily habits and she became a memory, not a constant. He lived his grief privately, never speaking in detail with you both because he knew that neither was ready for it. He was more than happy to help you with the boxes, even more if it meant to get you out of the perpetual grief inside your apartment.
The twins came with him, another good thing since they were playing with the cat and leaving you and your uncle alone with the 12 boxes. Too many things, you were already lost on it.
“Okay, kiddo, have you ever done this before?” You shook your head still looking at the boxes. “Don’t worry. Abby and I had to do this to grandma’s stuff, it’ll be like a band-aid. The sooner you rip it off, the better, alright?”
“What have you done with grandma’s things? Like… Have you donated? Gave to people close to her? How do you choose what to keep?” You asked putting both hands on your hips and trying to choose which box to start from.
“We choose to keep whatever we had attached memories to it. It wasn’t my idea, of course, Abby led it. She separated what we would be heartbroken to lose and everything else we gave away. Do you know how many dishcloths grandma had? Over a 100, I counted myself.”
You laughed at the memory of your mom calling you to say she had never seen that many dishcloths inside the same drawer. She sounded happy in that call, not emotionally drenched from running her mother’s stuff. You can do it.
12 boxes became 3 piles as the afternoon became night. Uncle Michael made a pile of everything that he would donate to the Salvation Army, a second pile for the things he would keep for him (you almost started a fight for her harmonica, but he knew how to play it and you had no clue) and third one for what you choose to keep.
Her sea animal drawings, some technical books, her jewelry box, her fridge magnets and postcard collections, got even an old cardigan that she would always use in winter inside the house. You did feel lighter like it wasn’t no longer in the back of your mind that at some point you would have to open every single box and be reminded that she was no longer here.
Uncle Michael was still separating some books to donate when a picture fell from one of them. You saw a little girl’s face and smiled at how much of her features she still in her mature face after growing up. He nodded for you to get closer to the picture.
“Look it. You kinda looked alike, see?” He pointed to some parts of her face, the ones you haven’t noticed in you in a while. You couldn’t help but smile at it.
“Never saw this. Does it have a date?” Uncle Michael turned the picture and in a corner you could read May, 1972. “She was an only child yet.”
“Yeah, that’s why she is smiling, still had some peace,” you both laughed at it. With a smile on his lips, Uncle Michael put the picture in your hands. “You should give it to Grandpa. He is always at his office, this picture is from a window near his table, see? I think he would like to have it.”
You pondered about it, if his behavior had some connection to the picture just like Joel’s lilacs were still connected to Sarah. Joel. You haven’t seen him in a while, mostly getting updates here and there from Tess. Maybe he was busy with his own set of boxes too, cleaning up his baggage a box at a time.
Ink moves faster in the paper getting shape little by little. You are near the catering listening to Henry’s story, but your mind is focused on taking every detail of Joel’s side profile.
He is oblivious to it, lost in his thoughts to notice you drawing him from afar. Rare are the moments he allows himself to come to the grief support group meetings, you can count on your fingers how many times you saw him on Wednesdays since his first time.
“Since when did you become an artist?” Henry teases you as he tries to sneak a peek at your sketchbook, gaining a push from you.
“I already told you, this is for therapy. I won’t show you shit.” Closing the sketchbook, you move around the table trying to look busy as Joel walks in your direction.
You are getting bolder with every new interaction, including bringing your sketchbook for the grief support group just in case you run into him. Not that you would ever share your drawings with him, that would be creepy. Some habits are private, not shared.
Joel, despite being unaware of the impact he has on you, seems to be getting more comfortable in your presence as well. His hair is a little shorter than the last time you saw him, months ago. You miss the curls but enjoy how his square jaw is more evident. His smile is genuine and you can’t help but smile back. There is some calming quality about him, something that makes you want to stay by his side whenever he shows up at these meetings. And this is exactly what you do.
“Want some coffee? Black, right?” You ask but start to pour right away, not waiting for his response.
“Thank you. Have you seen Tess? She said to meet her here.” His eyes don’t avoid yours, holding to the weight of your stare as he tastes the coffee.
“Didn’t she say something about a doctor’s appointment earlier today?” Henry tries to remember and Joel frowns a bit but quickly vanishes from his face when Frank gets everyone to sit in the circle.
Today is a special meeting, the type you avoid every year, a death anniversary kind of meeting. You know it from before coming here because Hannah made sure to say every five minutes last week. And here she is, looking bright as new even if it is her sister’s death anniversary.
You shouldn’t judge how someone mourns their dead ones, your mom raised you better than that, and yet there is an uncontained jealousy spreading all over your body at how easily Hannah can use a dreadful date as a sweet reminder of her sister’s life.
You are lost on her words, still clinging to your jealousy of how easygoing she is about it. She is speaking nonstop and you wish nothing but to shut her up.
“She planned it, you know. Her funeral. I hated her for it, making my nephew and I think of her in this position. She had been struggling to breathe in her palliative care and still found time to make us understand that her death wouldn’t mean the absence of her in our lives. I try to make him still feel her around as time goes by.
“This is a buttercup from her funeral wreath, she chose herself the yellow because it was our bedroom color when we were growing up. I saved this one for me, I keep it on my nightstand as if we were still little girls sharing a room.”
The dried flower was sitting delicately in her hands, she held it with such care that you felt bitter for having envied her. There were unshed tears in her eyes, you wondered what was worse: losing a loved one violently, abruptly, or seeing them slowly dying without being able to help?
Being able to say goodbye, to cherish a final moment, was something that you couldn’t have with your mom. What would you say to someone you knew it was about to die? No idea but it is glued to your mind since you realized through the meetings that everyone has a final moment with their loved one, whether they choose or not.
You can’t remember your final words to your mom. You hope it was “I love you”.
Tess joins the meeting in a hurry, sunglasses on even if it is evening. Without a word, she plops next to Joel (who was kind enough to spare a spot next to him) and dismisses any question he might have with a hand before crossing her arms.
His eyes search for yours in a “Do you know something about it?” just to receive a “not a clue” from you. In your slow friendship, you became able to identify the meaning behind his frowns, even more so since Joel appears to be always worried about something.
Hannah finishes her sharing and tucks delicately the dried buttercup back into her purse, with that the atmosphere shifts back to the regular meeting state but your mind drifts to Hannah and her sister's last moments.
Did they plan her final day? Was Hannah with her in her final breath? What were her sister’s final words? Part of you want answers because maybe, just maybe, they won’t make you feel jealous anymore.
Joel’s eyes are boring into yours, you notice as you move from Hannah’s purse back to him. The perpetual frown is there, now asking you “Are you okay?” and you nod just once in response. He doesn’t take it as true but gets his attention back to Frank as the man starts to speak.
“Thank you, Hannah. Bringing with you the buttercup was very sweet, thank you for sharing.” Frank affirmation dawns on you, the woman brought with her the last connection with her sister from such a private space of her life and you are here feeling jealous.
Your hand goes straight to the necklace resting on your neckline. The small starfish pendant that your mother gave to you as a graduation gift, “You’ll always be my star, baby” she said as she hugged you. What if you lost it one day? Would you also lose another part of her?
“Tess, glad you could get here in time. The space is yours.” Frank smiles sweetly to a groaning Tess.
“Yeah, okay. Let me just, sh-,” she angrily moves in her chair and gets a flyer from her back pocket, shoving it in Joel’s hand to move around. “Santa Lucia Hospital is low on blood donations, again. It wouldn’t be a surprise to some of you the amount of times I went on emergency and needed one of those. So yeah, I spoke with Frank and Henry earlier, we’re thinking about doing something to help their campaign to get more donors.”
Henry’s arms are resting on his knees as he nods to Tess’ words. “If you can donate, please do. One bag can help up to three people.”
He once lost his baby brother to sickness too, just like Hannah. You never questioned Henry about his final words to Sam, just like you never envied him for being able to say goodbye. You saw behind his actions how much Sam’s presence was a ghost he was still struggling to deal with. It made so much sense that he, from all the people in the grief support group, would help this cause.
“You can count on me for it.” You spoke right away, but the same second that a smile appeared on your lips, it froze as you noticed a stare exchange between Frank, Henry, and Tess. “What?”
“This is a state campaign. The hospital receives people from all over Texas, they’ll be holding the main donation in Houston. At the beach.” Frank stated with a sad smile.
You faded little by little. Most of the group knew about your situation, except a few people like Joel who was frowning at you in anticipation.
“It's okay, guys. Really. I can donate at the hospital here in Austin, maybe help with the logistics overall before the campaign day?” It was fine, it was. At least you tried to tell yourself that as you held once more the starfish pendant.
“That would be lovely, I’m sure we’ll need as much help as possible.” Frank tried to amend it before choosing another person to speak.
Later on, when everyone was getting ready to leave, you felt a warm hand on your shoulder. Turning around, you faced Joel somewhat closer than you have ever been to him before. You tried to keep your cool hoping he didn’t notice.
“Tess asked me to tell you that if you need help delivering the materials for the campaign, you can use my truck.” He said almost whispering, like a secret that only you could hear.
“Thanks, Joel. Can I have your number? So I can sort out the logistics.” You tried hoping for a yes and received an eager nod.
In a weird circumstance, you met Joel on a Friday. You had to check your calendar a few times, just to make sure, but yes, he would meet you soon enough on a Friday morning, 8 am.
He cleared his whole day to focus on Tess’ campaign, you knew they were best friends and it just reinforced that. His truck was parked in the university lot, near the lab where you were still finishing some analysis as you waited for him.
He knocked at the glass window, gaining your attention. You made a quick gesture for him to wait before proceeding to take the gloves and your coat before walking out the door.
“Hey, Joel. Thank you for coming by to get everything, I put the stuff in the office, c’mon.” You started to guide him through the university’s corridor, but he was still looking into the lab from the window. “Is everything alright?”
“Yeah, let’s go,” he quickly replied following your steps.
“It’s these t-shirts and the stress balls, I put everything in that corner.” You pointed to the other side of the room, as you opened the door for him to enter.
Joel’s eyes were taking in the wall decor: your mom’s sea animal drawings, some shells at the table close to the exposed shark cranium. The office screamed marine biologist, or at least that you should be out there at the sea.
He must have noticed and kept to himself, too polite to get in your business. The comfortable silence filled the room as you collected all the materials before making the way back to the truck, but you could feel him thinking about it. Why the hell would a woman who studies the sea and their animals have a problem with being at the beach?
You faced that question whenever someone asked you to do on-site research, which you would politely recuse. For years the head professor of the department tried to tag you along, but you would say a harsh no. You were happy with reviewing papers, doing your best at the university’s lab, avoiding the sea breeze directly on your face.
Joel glanced once or twice at your face as you kept your eyes staring in front of you, too afraid of his reaction to your small secret.
“Are you sure you don’t want to come with us? I can give you a ride.” He asked simply, opening the truck so you could put everything there.
“Yeah, I’m sure. Send my love to everyone, will you?” With a smile, you tried to get your shit together.
He smiled back before hopping in the driver's seat, leaving you alone with your thoughts and memories. Is not like you couldn’t get back to the beach, you could. The sand between your toes, the water splashing around, how the boat moves between the waves… You missed everything dearly, but couldn’t be there. Not yet, at least.
The day went by, nothing new happened. When you getting ready to leave the university, your phone lit up with a new notification from Joel’s number.
Got a big one for your collection, x
He wrote with an image of a big pink shell, almost the size of his hand, attached. A grin appeared on your face automatically, as if it was the first time you saw one of those.
I love it! It’s so pretty! Thank you, you wrote back still shocked he took his time to go shell searching for you.
Maybe this is why you decided to open those 12 boxes, to create room for new objects and the memories they represent as you live.
“You are late,” Grandpa mumbles as you enter the room. There is a gift carefully wrapped in your hand but he doesn’t care, he is too busy staring at your face in search of a motive.
“Yes, I am. Got caught up on work, sorry.” You place the gift next to him not minding to justify your actions longer, he hates excuses even when they are true.
Today isn’t the case. Deep down you know he knows you lied about work, too much time in a family event without her doesn’t sit right with you. She was the glue between you all, conversations don’t run as easily as before.
You already greeted everyone when entering the house, from your uncle to your cousins who still give you a sympathetic look at these family gatherings. They can sense your discomfort from afar, no matter how much you try to sound interested in their lives you can’t keep up with them, you can barely keep up with Grandpa.
There’s laughing and chattering next door, your uncle is retelling some old family joke. You can almost hear the sound of her laughing with them. Grandpa must read your mind as unwraps the gift.
“You know, Abby’s favorite spot to hide was behind the curtains of that window. I could always find her there after a long day. I think I use here as a hiding place too, she found a good spot for clearing the mind.”
His voice was soft just like his gaze between you and the paper he was tearing apart, revealing a picture in a gold frame. You didn’t hesitate to frame a picture of your mom when a girl leaning from behind these curtains as a birthday gift after Uncle Michael's commentary.
“Found it in one of her boxes, I think she stole it from grandma. Thought it should be here in your office, not in a cardboard box in my storage room.”
Grandpa nodded as his thumb was caressing the little girl’s face. Her toothless grin, the dimple on her cheek, everything made Grandpa travel back in time.
“I took this photo, did you know that? She lost her tooth earlier that day and felt ugly without it. Found her here and took some photos as she giggled, showing that beautiful smile.” His other hand found yours, holding it tightly. “Thank you.”
“Happy birthday, Grandpa.” You replied ignoring the tightness in your throat as you watched his face lighten up. “Do we still have cake?”
He placed the frame at his desk, facing the window’s curtains, and got up from the chair guiding you to the laugh in the kitchen. The cake with candles signing 84 was right in the middle, you scootch yourself to a corner as everyone found a space around the kitchen’s island to sing Happy Birthday. Glancing around, you made mental notes about the smiles on their faces, the lightness of your grandpa’s eyes looking back at his family. He was living the moment, not holding on to the past just like a second ago.
When Grandpa blew out the candles, you made a wish too: to allow yourself to feel peace, not just longing.
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Taglist: @islacharlotte, @anoverwhelmingdin, @aquanatalie
#joel miller#tlou fanfiction#joel miller fic#joel miller x original character#joel miller x reader#joel miller fanfiction#joel miller x f!reader#joel miller x you#pedro pascal#pedro pascal fic#pedro pascal fanfic#the last of us#the last of us hbo#wednesday series
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Queen of hearts
Acknowledgements and Disclaimers: this one goes out to all the moms out there. New moms. Experienced moms. Mom-to be. Yall are heroes man. All the love.
Shout out to the mutual who helped answer my pregnancy questions. Thanks for letting me pester you. You know who you are. Any mischaracterizations of pregnancy, labor, or postpartum are completely my own.
Warnings: brief depictions of labor. Mentions of depression. Also not proof read.
***
9 months had flown by like a dream. The whole thing had felt like a movie. And Matty, having made a career out of making life feel like a movie, was wary of the whole thing. Of course they’d had their ups and downs. Worrying over what constitutes a good parent and whether they were going to fuck this child up before it even had a chance to grow up and make its own mistakes. The occasional shock over how powerful and real hormone fluctuations can be. The Braxton Hicks scare. The late night cravings and the crying (some of which was done by him, if he’s being honest). Arguing over baby names, if the kid should be allowed to play football before a certain age lest they get injured. If, being the child of artists meant that the child would be sign up for music and art lessons, or if they would wait and see what the kid naturally gravitates towards. If gender-neutral clothing was inherently boring and lifeless, or, if it was ‘too woke’ to have a baby girl in a car onesie or a baby boy is a butterfly onesie. It was, after all, a pregnancy, not a walk in the park. But he’d loved and welcomed every bit of it. And so had Jo. He’d swelled with joy watching her nest and acquire baby clothes, paint the nursery, and start a vintage stuffie collection. He’d helped her curate a little library of children’s books for kids of all ages, to make sure their baby would be guaranteed a great start, no matter how advanced they turned out to be (Jo and Matty, were, of course, convinced that their child would be a genius). Looking back, even the labor and delivery process seemed perfect.
Jo had screamed at him the whole day.
“We can’t actually go to the hospital just yet. I called. The front desk woman told me to stay put and put on some yoga music.”
Jo had unleashed a string of obscenities upon him that he has chosen to omit from memory ( he remembers them perfectly. She had asked him if he was a demented fucker or if he would like this baby to come out or a teeny tiny hole in his penis instead). He had laughed, told her that she was funny and that he was falling in love with her all over again. She’d thrown the tv remote at his head, missing narrowly.
His gravest mistake, however, was trying to document everything. He’d brought a film camera into the delivery room, which the nurses had balked at. But Matty has been used to being called eccentric so he didn’t care. He wanted to remember every single moment of this day forever. And, when Jo had failed to convince him by making the same arguments that he often proposed at his own shows, for his own fans to put the camera away and just be in the moment, she’d decided to teach him an lesson by choosing not to warn him about the messiness of childbirth. The next thing she heard him say was “oh. So much blood.” Before he’d dropped the godforsaken camera to the floor, smashing it to bits. And ridding everyone of its evils forever.
“Oh my god, she’s here, Jo! I can see her head!” He’d rushed over to her, with tears in his eyes, squeezing her hand. “C’mon, Jo. You’ve got this! One more push.”
“I can’t, I can’t, I can’t. It’s too much. I just- she’s gonna have to stay in there forever.”
“‘fraid we can’t do that, Josephine” the doctor shook her head. “She’s almost out which means it’s tight on her now, if you don’t push, you’re hurting her.”
Jo instantly burst into tears.
“No, no, no! Baby don’t cry!” Matty cooed, then turned towards the doctor. “Why the fuck would you say something like that to her? Right now, as well! are you TRYING to upset my wife right in the middle of the birth of my child?” He hovered over Jo protectively, wiping her sweaty forehead with one of the rags that the nurses had brought in, and kissing her. “You’re okay, Jo. Our baby is going to be okay. Deep breaths, yeah?”
“You promise?” She whispered, too embarrassed for the nurses and doctor to hear.
Matty swears, this, was the moment that he became a dad. Knowing that his wife and child needed him to be the sane and steady one for the first time completely changed him as a person.
Though he had no business making these promises, he’d never felt more certain of anything in his life. “I promise, my love. I’ve got you. And you’ve got our baby. She really needs you right now. So….lets do this, yeah?”
Jo nodded, watching the nurse approach and take her hand to pull her back into position.
“C’mon,love. One more push?” The matronly lady encouraged.
Jo screamed as she gave it her all, Matty’s hand in hers.
“Great! You’re doing great, Josephine! Give me one more push!” The doctor smiled.
“You said that last time! Every single time you say this is gonna be the last push! You’re fuckin lying.”
With tears in her eyes, Jo screamed and cussed out everyone in the room, pushing with all her might, until finally, the baby was out. She heard cheering and congratulations erupt around the room which was her cue to lay back and finally relax.
“Dad, Would you like to do the honors? cut the umbilical cord?” The nurse had asked.
“Oh? I- erm I …should. But I don’t wanna leave you? But also I don’t wanna leave…her- I….” Years later, Matty would realize that it was, in fact, this moment, that had made him into a dad. The moment that he felt conflict between choosing to stay by Jo’s side and hold her hand through what she had just accomplished , or let go of her hand to go meet his daughter instead.
“Go, Matty, go.” Jo had encouraged him, her voice weak from screaming. She nodded as he hesitantly loosened his hold on her hand.
“Let’s fuckin do this!” His shaky hands took the surgical scissors from the doctor and made the cut. “Oh my fuckin god, hiiii” matty cried as he met his daughter for the first time. He almost reached out to take her into his arms but, then, realized that it should be Jo who gets to hold her first.
“Would you like to-“
“Yes, oh god, yes, please?” Jo sat up straight.
Matty, with fresh tears still running down his cheeks, leapt into action adjusting her pillows to support her back as she leaned forward to receive her child.
“Oh god, Matty, look. She’s so….”
“Perfect.”
Everything, about Sophia, from conception to birth, had been perfect. So, it was a complete shock to Matty (and to Jo) when things changed postpartum.
It all started with Jo sleeping in a bit more than usual. At first, Matty had written it off as her body recovering from labor. After all, she’d literally housed, sheltered, and built a human being from scratch for 9 months. She was entitled to a little bit of extra sleep if that’s what she needed. Besides, he saw this as his opportunity to step in. While Jo was pregnant, Matty felt limited in how much help he could be. He flew back and forth in between tour dates to be at doctors appointments, and to help purchase the crib and pick out the nursery colors. He drove across the country to make it to specialty bakeries and shops to fulfill the strange flavor combinations of pregnancy cravings. But none of it was comparable to literally being pregnant. So, it was only fair that he take on some of the work now that the child was born, and let Jo get her rest.
He wanted to be the best dad he possibly could. So, he dove in head first. And he missed the signs. It wasn’t until he was holding Sophia in his arms, looking at Jo, as she laid in bed, saying “it’s a baby, Matty. All it does is cry and sleep. What does it want from me?” That he realized something was deeply wrong. By then, it was too late.
Matty walked around the messy house, eyes blood shot and sore. Whether it was the crying or the lack of sleep, he wasn’t sure. He went into the kitchen, pulling out a massive trash bag and hauling in all the empty takeout containers that had been sitting there all week, shoving them all into the trash bag. He needed to step up his housekeeping game. At this rate, they’ll be living in squalor by the next few days.
He pulled the only clean mug left out of the cupboard and reached for the coffee machine that had been on since this morning, pouring himself a cup.
“Fuckin hell.” He whispered at nothing in particular. What time was it? What day of week or month even was it? He tapped his phone screen for answers. It was a Wednesday in the middle of the month. Just shy of noon. He knew that the best thing he could possibly do for his family right now would be to admit that he’s in over his head. And ask for help.
***
“Where is she now?” Adam asked, stirring the sugar into Matty’s tea before placing the mug in front of him.
“home. Erm….the cleaning service is working on the house. Her mom is there, too, to watch Sophia while she showers and stuff, so….”
Adam nodded, at a loss for words. He squeezed Matty’s shoulder gently.
“What do I do? How do I fix this?” Matty’s eyes darted between Adam and Carly, who wizzed around the kitchen, preparing dinner, with her son at her feet.
“You can’t fix it, mate.” Adam shrugged. Sheepishly.
“I know; I know. But- what do I do?”
Adam simply rubbed his friends back, searching his brain for any words of solace or wisdom.
“Matty, have you eaten anything today?” Carly asked, with her back to him, standing at the stove and stirring something that Matty couldn’t quite see.
He was offended by the question. He’d come to her with the biggest problem he’s ever had to face and her response was to ask if he was hungry? Speechless and indignant, he shook his head. “I have not. No.” He gritted, anger palpable in his voice.
Carly knew better than to take it personally.
***
Carly and Adam exchanged a look. Adam nodded, rising to his feet and taking his child from between his mother’s legs. “C’mon, little man. It’s time for bed. Let’s get into the bath. Give mummy and uncle Matty a bit of time to chat.”
Carly walked over to Matty at the dining table, setting down two huge containers in front of him. “This one’s soup. This one’s chicken and veg. Take them home. Freeze the leftovers and defrost as needed.”
“Carly, I-“
“Comfort food is good. For both of you.” She smiled brightly. “She won’t have an appetite but keep offering it to her anyway.”
“Right.”
“I’m gonna send you a list. Maybe pop into the shops on your way home and buy some of it. Baby cream, nipple pads, stuff like that.”
Matty nodded, dutifully.
“I’ll speak to Patricia and Charli and everybody. We’ll start a rotation. Check in on her and- maybe even send you off to the store a few times. There are just some girl things that she might not have on. Just some bits and bobs to make her life easier.”
“Hmm. Yeah. I suppose.”
“Matty, darling, you know who you need to speak to here. Who she needs to speak to. And it isn’t me, and it isn’t Adam, or George, or Ross, or even a doctor who will rattle off some statistics at her. Why haven’t you done it yet?”
***
Carly was right. Matty knew the person for the job. The reason that he hadn’t called his mom yet was because he was ashamed. Ashamed to admit, in front of her, that he had failed. He’d failed his wife. Failed his kid. Failed to do what he claimed his mother’s struggle had taught him. Failed to be patient, failed to be empathetic. He expected too much from her and he resented her when she wouldn’t rise to it. And he hated that about himself.
But his mom was always there. All he needed to do was call her and say “mum, I need you.”
Denise rushed over.
“Oh, matty, it’s okay.” She placed her hand over his. “It’s different when it’s your partner, isn’t it?”
“Why, though? It shouldn’t be! It’s not like she’s any more or less of a person, a woman, or a mother than you were when you had me!”
Denise rolled her eyes. They both knew Matty was smarter than this. “Yeah, but that doesn’t matter, does it? You were 17 when I told you about my depression. It had been 17 years. You’d seen me differently. And you knew I loved you because you’d felt it your whole life. You were only finding out about that stuff after the fact. This is not the same. Besides, the way that you feel about your partner is not supposed to be like the way that you feel about your mother, or if it is then I haven’t done my job raising you right.”
Matty frowned and licked his lips, searching his brain for a clever comeback.
“You feel like you’ve been abandoned. Like she’s left all the parenting on you and you’re trying your best but she’s not giving you much to work with.” Denise simply stated.
Matty laughed in disbelief. “That’s absurd. She hasn’t abandoned me.”
“Course, she hasn’t. She’s got an illness, she’s not a bad mother. But that’s what it feels like. And that’s okay. You’re allowed to be scared. You’re a new father too. You’ve got no idea what you’re doing and you want to be able to do turn to her but you can’t.”
“I- “ matty turned tongue-tied. Unsure how to respond. It made him uncomfortable to have his unspoken thoughts said out loud for him. “did dad ever…?”
“I don’t know. You’d have to ask him. I didn’t really speak much to him at the time. Sort of….blamed him for it, actually. A part of me felt like, somehow, he had done this to me or something.”
Matty listened, wondering if Jo felt that way about him.
“In fact, why don’t you go do that right now. Call him round. I’ll get upstairs and check on Jo.”
***
Tim left Matty flipping through old photo albums and went to answer the door, smiling wide and proud when he was met with Louis at his brothers doorstep. “You’re joining the crew?”
“You didn’t think you’d have a party without me and I wouldn’t find out about it, did ya?” Louis winked. “Nah, mum called. Said to come to Matty’s instantly.”
“Get in there!” Denise appeared behind them. “And don’t call it a party that’s insensitive.”
She shut the door, beckoning both men to huddle in the corner with her.
“We’re all here for one thing and one thing only.” Denise spoke with the command of a military officer issuing orders . “To watch the baby for the next two days. We work in shifts. Louis, you’re young and still have your back. You’ll take the overnight shift. Tim you start now. I’ll step in between you two.”
The two men exchanged a smile, nodding.
“And if you want to be here off the clock, you are not a houseguest. You don’t just sit sound and expect to be catered to. Consider yourself a contributing member of the household. Roll up your sleeves and see what needs doing around here. Let’s give them some time and room to figure out what Jo needs.”
***
Matty felt his heart shatter into a million pieces inside his chest when he walked into their bedroom and saw Jo, hugging the duvet, with tears in her eyes.
He rushed over to her, but as he reached for her hand, he recalled all the times that he’d tried to initiate any form of physical intimacy over the last few weeks —a hug, a cuddle, a kiss, sex— only for her to turn him down. He pulled away, hesitant, and not wanting to pressure her into anything. He wasn’t sure if these attempts were his way of trying to comfort her or if it was himself who needed the comforting. He would never think that he could possibly understand what she was going through, but, he couldn’t deny that he needed her, too. So much so that he was certain a simple touch from her would bring him to his knees.
“Jo, Darling,” he whispered, “fuck. You have no idea how much I wish I could kiss you right now.“
Jo blushed as if it were the first time that he had ever looked at her that way.
“Your mom- Denise, she…well, she and I talked. I don’t think I’m okay, Matty.”
He sat on the bed, looking at her. She was a shell of the person that he’d fallen in love with. “It’s alright, baby-“
“How can it be alright? I’m a mother! I- I’m a danger to my own child. When I should be her first and fiercest protector!” Jo yelled, sobbing into her own hands.
The sound of her crying was worse than a knife to Matty’s chest.
“Well, it’s a good thing she’s got me, then, isn’t it?” Matty pulled her into his lap, laying her head against him.
“I love her…” Jo tried to convince herself of her own words “ I want to love her.”
“Course, you do, Jo. You’re just not able to feel much of anything right now. Because of what you’re going through. But, we’ll fix it. I promise. We will.” He planted a kiss to her head “I’m sorry, honey. I’m really sorry I let it get this bad.”
“Matty, it’s not your fault-“
“No, it is. I- I thought that I was being a good dad by prioritizing Sophia over you. I thought it was what I was supposed to do. I thought it was what was best for us all.” She felt Matty’s tears dripping down onto her hair. “But it’s you, Jo. You’re what’s best for all three of us. Sophia and I need you. We’re nothing without you.”
Jo wished she had the will or capacity to comfort him, to want to hold her daughter in her arms. She knew it must be difficult on him, and she hated being a source of his pain.
“I’m sorry, Matty-“
“No!” She felt him stiffen. “Don’t. Don’t apologize. You’ve got nothing to be sorry for, you hear me? You’re not alone. Neither are Sophia and I. Look how many people it took to get us to talk” he giggled at the thought. “Look how many people love you and want to support you.”
He saw the beginnings of a smile on her face. “Carly has practically started a catering business trying to feed us. You should see our kitchen. It’s never been this stocked up even when we’re both at home.”
Jo let out a small chuckle, the first since Sophia was born.
To Matty, that small sound was like finding water in the middle of wandering the desert.
***
Matty walked up and down room at the pace that he had discovered was most comfortable for baby Sophia to nap. He rocked her gently in his arms whispering, “you’re gonna be a sweet quiet girl yeah? Look at mommy. She’s so pretty when she’s asleep next to your crib, don’t you think, Soph? You take after her, that’s for certain. Let’s go get mommy a blanket, yeah? Shall we? Look at you! Taking care of mommy already. Bestest baby in the world, you are.”
#valentine75#matty healy fanfic#matty healy fluff#matty healy writing#matty healy fanfiction#matty healy imagine#matty healy x oc
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oooh lewis + holiday + angst(?) 👀
congratulations on 1k bb! i love your writing btw from fellow brasileira
Holiday | LH44
⸺ the one where you are ready to settle down and go back to your home country, but Lewis is not.
✓ mentions of breakup and feeling homesick.
⁕ one word, a thousand stories blurb night (CLOSED)
⁕ my masterlist and my taglist
When Yn left to pursue her dream she had barely reached the age of twenty-one. The world was fairly new to her and there were so many things to experience and discover.
Ten years later she felt like she had seen a bit of everything. She was aware that there were infinite possibilities of things to see around, but at that point, she wanted to settle for a bit. She was tired of traveling non-stop and all the different languages she had to use. She missed feeling when speaking, and how one word would bring a thousand memories, because speaking in English, German, or Spanish, would be it: just speaking. But speaking in Portuguese would always be communicating exactly everything she felt and wanted others to feel. Speaking in Portuguese was using the word "Saudade" and remembering how it felt to whisper that to her grandmother every weekend as if they were apart for years when in reality they hadn't seen each other for only five days. Speaking in Portuguese was asking for "Cafuné" and getting her hair messed by her mom, who would look down at her lying on the sofa, and caress her shoulders, somehow getting a bit of the weight for her too. Sharing the pain of missing someone they used to see every weekend. Speaking in Portuguese, more than just speaking was going back to the past in a homesick way that would make you feel warm and cared for. It was feeling whole, and right now, Yn felt in pieces.
"What's up, honey?" Lewis asked, sitting beside Yn and handing her a hot cocoa mug.
She grabbed the mug using both hands and shook her head staring at the foam, but they had been together for over three years and Lewis knew exactly when she was lying or dodging a conversation, so he made himself comfortable on the couch and brought Yn closer, kissing the top of her head. The warmth of his body and clothes made her tears finally spill.
"I'm cold," she choked, and he furrowed his brows. "I'm cold and I'm never this cold when I spend Christmas in Brazil. And it's playing Michael Bubblé, but my grandma would always listen to Roberto Carlos," the tears were freely drifting down her face, smudging her makeup and blurring her vision.
"We can spend Christmas there next year, babe, it's n-"
"I wanna spend every day there, Lewis!" She got up, dropping the small blanket that was on top of her legs. She cried harder looking around the empty house. His family would show up any minute, and some friends would probably do too, but her mom and her dad wouldn't. Her childhood friends wouldn't. Nothing that reminded her of home would. "I'm tired of flying nonstop, working from my computer, and having all my coworkers be online colleagues. I'm tired of the taste of the food everywhere we go because none of them tastes like the food my dad would do... I think I saw enough of the world, I wanna settle down, and...I wanna the safety of home." She blurted out.
Lewis listened to everything from his spot and he almost heard his own heartbreaking when she spoke about home as if her hometown was her home and not him. Because to him, she was her home.
“But- I’m not even close to retiring, I still have so much in me,” he mumbled, eyes cast down. He knew they could make it work with her living in a different country, but it would be exhausting. It wouldn't be giving their love the chance it deserved, but rather turning it into heartbreak.
“I know,” she nodded, feeling her heart clench even more. When their eyes met they knew exactly what it meant. They silently agreed to step back.
For Yn, speaking about “Christmas” would never be like whispering "feliz natal" while Roberto Carlos played in the background of the house. And now, for Lewis, speaking about Christmas would always be remembering how heartbreak felt like after you thought you found home.
― ⋆🪩 VOICEMAIL: That was a bit self-indulged, I have to confess. But aaa Im happy you’re liking it in here *mwah* I hope this brazilian!reader angsty reached to your expectations.
I hope y’all like it too!! Don’t forget to reblog and leave me a comment 💗
#lh44#requests#op: blurbs#one word a thousand stories blurb night#lewis hamilton#lewis hamilton blurb#lewis hamilton imagine#lewis hamilton x reader#brazilian!reader#f1 fandom#f1 imagines#f1 x reader#millie writes
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(Part 1 of the pop star Chrissy AU)
“So what you’re saying is that you are 100% positive that I’ve spent my day with, not only an actual, real life international pop sensation; but the same Chrissy Cunningham that you have been fangirling over since senior year of high school?”
Robin hears Steve groan on the other end of the line. She can't blame him though, she’s made him explain her exact situation to her 3 times over.
“Yes Robin, that’s definitely her,” he sighs.
Robin falls back down on her bed, she can’t believe this. If she had been honest with herself, that entire day felt like a fever dream, a fantasy she had conjued up from weeks of sheer boredom. It was hard to ignore, the feeling that her day shared with her was a one time thing, especially after Chrissy apologetically declined to meet up with her the next day, saying she had to do work stuff.
Thinking about it, in retrospect, the signs were there. She had absolutely talked about how she worked in music and had been travelling a lot with it recently - yeah, Robin thought she was probably in a small band or was a session musician by the way she talked so casually about it.
But this? Shit, this whole situation she's found herself in? it’s like something out of those stupid romance novels her mom and Steve like talk about.
She always had it in her head that pop stars were meant to be over the top and flashy, but Chris just seamed so…sweet. She was listened to robin ramble on and on about everything and nothing, laughed loudly at her terrible jokes before giving her perspective or talking all about her own experiences
And when she smiled? She radiated happiness and joy as if she was the personification of the sun. There would be an etching of that smile in her brain for the rest of Robin's life.
“Robin!”’ His voices takes her out of her trace, grounding her in reality. “Are you still there?”
“Yeah,” is all she mandages to say.
“So you have two options,” Steve explains, and gods, she wishes he was here so she could at least see his eyes roll at her obvious awkwardness.
“The first is you just ignore that this whole meeting ever happened,” which, yeah is she absolutely not doing. Even if she never got to meet Chrissy again, at least she would still have the memory of meetng that deity of a human being.
“Or?” She asks, hoping that even 3637 miles away, Steve would be able to bring her down from her wild panic.
“Or; you listen to me and go see her.”
Steve has always been rather blunt, it’s what Robin likes so much about him. He tells her exactly what he means, no in between meaning to his statements.
“She’s playing a concert tomorrow night in the city, it’s probably why she said she couldn’t hang out tomorrow, she has sound checks and rehearsals and stuff," he explained, as if he knew her entire schedule (what was she kidding, he probably did.) "I'm going to get you a ticket, so you go to see her tomorrow night, enjoy the show, take a photo and dm her telling her how good her performance was, ok?”
He makes it sound so simple.
“But what if I go and do all this and it turns out that-“
“She’s straight? Robs, she’s very open about being bisexual-“
“No, dingus!” She yells into the receiver, running her hand through her hair. “What if I read the entire thing wrong and she was just being nice? I’m famously not good at reading the room and, for all I know, she could have thought this was just all a friendly thing that we have going? Like, listen to me Steve, I’m me, and if she’s the same pop sensation that you’ve talked drones about for as long as I’ve known you then what could she gain with a romantic endeavour with me? She could have anyone and not the person who she met yesterday who’s…”
“Who’s what, robs?”
She can’t answer that, knows if she says what she wants to that Steve will deny it, but she knows who she is - she’s annoying, too much all the time and knows that logically she wouldn’t be anyone’s first choice in friend, let alone girlfriend.
Sometimes she thinks it’s a miracle that Steve has been her friend for as long as he has.
“I know what you’re thinking,” he interrupts her inner monologue, voice softer than she’s used to with him. “But you have to stop thinking that you’re not good enough. The only person who’s allowed to talk shit about my best friend is me…and probably Erica, but I think she thinks you’re too cool to actually insult you much.”
Robins audibly snorts, falling back onto her bed.
As hard as it was being away from her family and the rest of their little friend groupd, the thing she misses the most is Steve. She was so used to having her platonic soulmate with her at all times, ready to latch onto for whatever the reason may be.
And right now? She could really use a hug, pecifically one from Steve "The Hair" Harrington.
“Robs, just trust me, she wouldn’t have spend they day following you around Paris is she wasn’t completely gone for you - she would have been at Disneyland with Corroded Coffin getting pictures with Darth Vader and shouting about how it's a capitalist utopia while eating the churros…" he pauses momentarily, and robin knows exactly what he's going to ask next. "...actually, speaking of, did she-?"
“Talk about Eddie Munson? Well, considering that I didn’t know that it was the same Eddie that you’ve had a raging boner over for the past year despite the fact-"
“Robin!”
“It’s true!” She yells, face now beaming from her laughter. “I’ll make you a deal, Stevie, if you plan works then I’ll put in a good word with Chrissy for you, she’s bound to know what gonna bring you into Munson’s raider-"
“Robin, stop!”
"-because I have some stories, Steve, and you’re lucky I was listening because if I didn’t like Chrissy so much I know wouldn’t remember, which would suck for you because i now know a few rather scandalous stories about the guy-"
“ROBIN!” Steve shouts through the receiver, making robin jump. “Focus!”
She shuts up, smiling to herself.
“I wish you were here, dingus,” she admits, rolling onto her stomach. “At least you’d be able to help me out, maybe, if this works, make sure I don’t pass out in front of her.”
“Of course it’s going to work” he states with every syllable oozing that signature Harrington’s smugness. “But only if you wear those plaid pants you have, the ones that hug your thighs in all the right places-“
“Gross, dingus!”
But sure enough, she listens, but if Steve’s right about one thing it’s how to leave a lasting impression, especially in the “you look good” department.
So, the following evening, she dons blue, plaid pants with a plain black tank, slicks back her hair using whatever hair products Steve left during his last visit and makes up her face: brushing electric blue pigments onto her eyelids before smudging kohl against her waterline.
It takes her serval pep talks in the mirror to finally convince herself to actually leave the apartment, but she did it, managed to walk to the venue and wait, nursing her beer whilst leaning against the against the back wall.
Robin kind of regrets not tagging along to all the Chrissy Cunningham concerts that Steve invited her too in the past, maybe then she would know what to expect.
(Or, maybe then, she wouldn’t be in this exact situation, but who was she kidding, of course she would be, nothing straight forward ever happens to her).
The entire thing is overwhelming, the venue has been crowded since before she arrived, (since it was well after the opening act ended) which really isn’t her scene. She’s already nervous and her hands won't stop shaking and she's about to call it quits, text Steve that she'll pay him back for the tickets in actual money rather than their original plan and walk out the doors of the theater where she can crawl back into bed and scream into her pillow-
The lights dim, and everyone around starts screaming as the first notes of the synth play, Chrissy's voice carrying through the room.
Robin can't help but stare, she's so beautiful, stunningly gorgeous with the voice of an angel, she doesn't even notice the rest of the band join her one by one or the two dancers who have a hand on Chrissy's shoulder. She doesn't even realise the opening number has finished, can't pay attention to anything other than the cascading curls of chrissys hair, the way her body moves in one with the music, the same smile that struck her heart in the first place- the smile that shines brighter than any spotlight ever could.
She doesn't register much, barely hears anything other than Chrissy sing about new moons, staying when she shouldn't or sending her love to Wayne; songs she know she's probably heard before, probably from (just being in close proximity to steve Harrington), but none of that matters, shes memorised by her.
And when the final act is coming to a close, she almost misses it, but she can feel eyes on her even this far to the back of the crowd.
Robin only meets Eddie Munson’s eyes for a second, impossibly wide eyes staring her down in disbelief before seeing his cue to exit the stage. She almost drops her half-drank pint, a string of curses running through her head - but the whole interaction has her frozen.
Her brain tells her to "RUN! GET OUT!" before it escalates any further, the churn of pure anxiety in her stomach reminding her that this was a stupid plan, she shouldn't have come. She cant do this, won't do this-
She leaves before lights go black.
⭐💘🎫🎤🎫💘⭐
So thank you all so much for the support on the first post, I was not expecting it to get traction buy you all loved it??? My heart is swelling omfg. Thank you for being patient with me with this part (I'm dyslexic and work full time, on top of just being very slow at producing, well, anything lol).
I'm hoping to have either 5 or 6 parts altogether if you guys keep enjoying it ((sorry not sorry to make you steddie fans sit through the Buckingham part first, Robin needs to get her girl!!!))
Shout out to my gf (who's not an st fan) for beta reading this with comments like "is Robin a useless lesbian?" Or "do they really say dingus in the show?" Or "wow, she really needs some loops!"
As a bonus treat, the concert playlist can be found here! Included are songs that represent or resemble the tracks on the set list of the gig that Robin goes too see (including the CCxCC material that would be played as the encore in the final three songs)
Taglist (if you wish to be added, I just ask you be polite about it x): @maya-custodios-dionach @papermachedragons @mildgendercrisis @vampiregirl1797 @lizard-dyk3 @hellomynameismoo @beckkthewreck @eboyawstenn @justmiiriam @gregre369 @korixae @victor-thee-corvid @yes-im-your-mom @bisexualdisastersworld @questionablequeeries
#ST popverse Au#i hope you all know that steve has a special twitter and tumblr account dedicated to Chrissy#follow for more steve being Chrissy Cunningham's number 1 fan lore#stranger things ficlet#stranger things#robin Buckley#Chrissy Cunningham#eddie munson#steve Harrington#Buckingham#robin x chrissy#chrissy x robin#bandqueen#steddie#steve x eddie#eddie x steve#i know its minor but its still there#stranger things season four#stranger things au#Luci’s ST thoughts
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Are You Alone? | Benny Miller One-Shot
Pairing: Benny Miller x Female Reader
Word Count: 3.4k | AO3 Link
Benny Miller Masterlist
Summary: You take a girls’ trip and Benny misses you.
Warning: Think of this as a combo platter - you get a little fluff, a little angst, and a little smut. Benny Miller comes with his own warning. This is an established relationship and these two like their terms of endearment. There is a brief mention of a parent's illness. Mutual masturbation. Sexting. Body insecurity. There are also some Spanish phrases thrown in. If you have any questions let me know!
Header images are to set a vibe.
A/N: Although this is part of the “Are You On Mute” series (Part 1 and Part 2), this can be read as a standalone. I should be writing other things but Garrett Hedlund posted a bunch of photos on Instagram this week and well…this is what happened.
“Oops, look what you stepped under,” Benny grinned, his arm behind his back so you knew he was up to something.
You furrowed your brows together, “Bun. What are you up to?”
With a swift move, he swung his arm up and over your head suspending a sprig of mistletoe inches above your forehead. This was your first holiday season as a married couple and he was fully in the spirit. He’d gone a bit overboard buying decorations for the house, including an elaborate light display for the outside complete with a synced musical accompaniment.
“You gotta kiss me, sweetheart, it’s the rule,” his eyes trailed up to look at the mistletoe before cocking his head to the side and grinning.
You playfully rolled your eyes and pressed up on your tiptoes to give him a kiss, which of course he deepened immediately. He wrapped his arms around your waist, bringing you closer to him.
“I have to finish packing,” you said as you reluctantly pulled away from him.
“You sure I can’t come with?” Benny exaggeratedly pushed out his lower lip, his blue eyes working overtime to aid in his pout.
“Baby, c'mon don't do that,” you rested your hands on his chest, playing with the pendant hanging from his silver chain. “We haven't had a girl's weekend in forever. Mom's feeling so good this year and my tias and cousins are coming in too. Besides, you know my sister could use the break from the kids,” you chuckled.
“I'm still going to miss you,” he murmured looking down, running his hands up and down your sides.
“I'll be back before you know it, Bun, and then we can do all the fun Christmas stuff you want. I'm sure you and the guys will figure out something fun to do while we're gone.”
Benny had a whole list of fun events around town and beyond that he wanted to go to with you; he was trying to make up for last year which was a bit of a blur. Between medical appointments for your mom and hospital visits, it wasn’t a festive and fun time. Instead, it was a time filled with stress and worry. Luckily you had your sister, her family, and Benny, of course.
One thing your mom loved to do to pass the time while she was in the hospital was talk about all of the trips she wanted to take. She kept coming back to New York City around the holidays. Seeing the tree at Rockefeller Center, going ice skating, and attending a Broadway show were among some of the things she had long dreamed of doing ever since she was a little girl.
At first, you placated her and listened to her dreams. You didn’t want to promise her anything. Frankly, you didn’t want to give yourself the hope that you’d be able to take the trip with her after all. But as the months passed, she started responding to the treatments and getting stronger. When Benny would come to visit, she’d his ear off about all of the places she wanted to go and how she wanted to be well enough to attend your wedding.
Your wedding day was an emotional day for so many reasons. Seeing your mom well and having fun, smiling, and dancing with your husband made it a memory you know will live on with you for the rest of your life. As if it couldn’t get any better, during the reception, Benny surprised her with the trip of her dreams. He planned the whole thing without you knowing, getting help from Santiago and Frankie’s girlfriend among others.
Now the time had come to go on this amazing trip and he was moping around, following you around the house like a lost puppy.
“I need you to make sure it looks like Christmas threw up in this house by the time I’m back ok?” You stroke his cheek and he presses his face into your hand and kisses your palm.
“Ok boss lady, I got my orders,” he winked.
___________________________
Benny: I haven’t gotten a photo in a while 😞
You smirked at your phone. With the finishing touches of your outfit done, you move to the full-length mirror of your hotel room to try and figure out a pose. You held the phone at different angles, trying to see what would be the most flattering angle.
“Oh my god, do you just want me to take it for you?” Your sister chimed in. You thought she was still getting ready, but instead, she had been silently watching you from the corner of her bed.
“Ugh no, I … I think this one is fine.”
“Oh stop it. You look hot and he’s going to lose his mind.”
You were dressed in a white turtleneck dress, a long brown coat with brown knee-high boots complete with some jewelry Benny had gotten you. Taking a deep breath, you decide to just pick a photo and hit send. Nearly instantly you get a response.
Benny: Ok hot mama! 🥵
Benny: What are you ladies getting up to tonight?
You: Thank you 😘 we’re going to dinner and we’ll see where the night takes us
Benny: Ooo, you girls gettin wild?
You: 🙄 how wild can I get with my mom and tias?
Benny: You really want me to answer that? How drunk were you at our wedding?
You: Fair. Idk, Mari will probably find something for us to do after, it’s our last night so we’ll see
You: What are you boys getting up to?
Benny: Hanging out, the weather is so nice. We have that fire pit Will wants to try so we’ll hang out, watch the game.
Benny: May have some cigars. 😏
You instantly press your thighs together and bite your lip. Ever since one particular guy’s night, cigars bring up a very distinct visual for you.
You: Well, seems like you boys will have fun. I miss you.
Benny: I miss you so much too. I want more pictures of my hot wife tonight 😉
“C’mon, Mari is downstairs and mom just said they’re headed down.” Your sister snapped you out of your bubble and you both rushed to get downstairs.
Dinner was pleasant, you all splurged on an expensive place reasoning that there was a lot to celebrate. As the meal wound down and the wine bottles were drained, everyone started talking about how to keep the party going. Your cousin Mari was tasked with looking up nearby swanky bars and lounges; she had a knack for always finding the trendiest places thanks to her incessant use of TikTok.
“Ooo I found a spot!” She turned her phone to you and your sister, who leaned over you to see the video.
“Fun! Looks like a good spot. Mom! You good with keeping it going?” Your sister called across the table to your mother.
“Claro mija! Vamos!”
__________________
Benny walked into the kitchen. He offered to grab more beers, figuring it would be a good opportunity to sneak away and text in peace.
“You miss her don’t you?” Benny turned around to see his brother-in-law leaning in the doorframe of the kitchen.
Benny nodded, “Yeah. I’m glad they’re having fun. They deserve it.”
“It’s ok to miss her Ben. I miss my wife too,” he smiled, walking over to pat Benny’s shoulder. “It looks amazing in here, she’s going to love it,” he said looking around at all of the decorations Benny has put up with the guys’ help today.
“Thanks, man.”
“C’mon, everyone’s waiting outside.”
Benny grabbed a couple of six-packs from the refrigerator and followed his newest brother outside. They walked up just in time. Santiago was passing out cigars as Frankie fussed with the TV to get the game on. Benny leaned back in his Adirondack chair, resting his head on the back of the chair when an idea popped into his head.
______________________
Your phone buzzed in your clutch but before you could grab it your sister shoves her phone in your face. “Mira! The boys are lookin' good tonight!” She showed the phone off to the group of ladies who all whistled in agreement.
She wasn’t wrong. Your brother-in-law snapped a selfie with Benny and the rest of the boys in the background. Benny threw up an ironic peace sign which made you laugh. But damn, did he look good.
He had on a black T-shirt underneath an open blue and white flannel shirt, the glimmer of his chain visible underneath his shirt. Of course, he wore his trusty baseball cap, backward. It looked like he hadn’t shaved since you left and you bite your lip remembering how it feels when he’s between your legs.
Remembering that you too received a text, you unlock your phone and see a message from Benny.
Benny: You girls having fun?
You: Yea! We made it to this bar that’s been super fun! Mom is having a blast.
You: OMG you know that actor you like from Cliff Beasts? He’s in the booth next to us!
Benny: No shit!
You: Yea! He’s soooo nice. Once he found out we were celebrating mom he bought us a couple of bottles and danced with her too lol
Benny: That all he did?
You: He’s here with his girlfriend who is super sweet by the way.
You: I miss youuuuu
A few minutes late, your phone buzzes again. When you open up your messages, you see a photo of Benny, leaning back in his chair with a cigar in his teeth, his other hand resting on his hat. The smolder he’s giving sends an electric pulse straight to your core. The man is a menace.
“Ay, papi chulo!”
You’d been staring at the photo for so long, that you hadn’t realized that your tias were looking over your shoulder at your phone.
“Mijita, Benny es guapisimo!”
“Lo se. He’s pretty handsome, isn’t he? If you excuse me, chismosas,” you winked and moved to sit on another couch away from prying eyes. Everyone gave you a hard time but you smiled and took the good-natured teasing.
You: You’re lookin’ good babe! 😍 Ugh I miss you so much. I wish you were here.
Benny: I miss you too. I feel like you owe me a photo now too.
You: I sent you one earlier silly.
Benny: Yeah, but I want to see what you look like right now.
You snap a quick silly selfie - duck lips while winking.
Benny: How’d I get so lucky?
You: Babe, the guys are going to give you a hard time if you keep talking with me.
Benny: Nah, they’re too wrapped up in the game to care about what I’m doing.
Benny: I think you should send me another picture…but not of your face 😜
Rolling your eyes, you propped your elbow on the couch holding your head there to think.
“I’m gonna go pee,” you announced to the group, who waved at you in acknowledgment as they went back to laughing and telling stories.
On the walk to the bathroom, you debated what you wanted to do. Before anything, you needed to make sure Benny’s phone wasn’t out in the open.
You: Are you alone? Can anyone see your phone right now?
______________________
Benny sat up straight in his chair upon receiving the latest text. He knew he was a bit bold in his ask, not wanting to take you away from your time with your family, but he also wanted to be a bit greedy.
He cleared his throat, “Anyone need a refill? I’m gonna go inside.” He didn’t wait to hear anyone’s response, already making his way back inside, missing the smirks his brother-in-law and Will were exchanging as he walked away.
Benny: I’m back inside, grabbing another beer.
The little chat bubbles started and stopped, the anticipation of what he was about to receive building.
______________________
Luckily, the bathroom stalls were rather spacious but you still weren’t sure what the hell you were about to do. You wanted to tease Benny a bit, so you decided to lift your dress so that he could see the bra and underwear set you had on - one of his favorites.
You snapped a few photos, dropping your dress back down as you quickly reviewed them. You debated what to say, writing and deleting a series of what you hoped were flirty one-liners. In the end, you decided to let the photo talk for itself.
______________________
“Fuck me,” Benny exhaled as his eyes go wide at the sight on his phone screen. He quickly saved it and then promptly zoomed in to inspect things further. He got a bit of a thrill knowing that you’d left your group to send this photo to him. It also doesn’t go unnoticed that you’re wearing one of his favorite sets underneath your dress.
You: Was that ok?
“Dammit, Ben,” he chastised himself. He had been staring at the photo for so long, he forgot to respond. He knew you’d probably been agonizing over sending this in the first place, wondering how it was going to be received. Looking out the window onto the backyard, he sees the guys engrossed in conversation, so he figured he wouldn’t be missed if he was gone just a bit longer. He ran down the hallway to his room, closing the door behind him and double-checking that it was locked.
______________________
The time waiting for Benny’s response was spent agonizing over every imperfection in your photo, wondering if he was noticing the stretch marks or the puffiness of your lower stomach.
You held your breath as you saw a notification pop up that you had a message. Opening it up, you felt your cheeks get warm looking at what Benny sent you. He’d gone back to his room, you recognized the comforter he was lying on, the one you picked out.
Benny: See what you did?
Along with the text was a photo of him from the waist down. Your mouth watered, seeing that he clearly was excited and very much turned on by what you sent. Before you’re able to think of something to send back you get another message, this time a video.
Your mouth was agape as you watched what Benny sent you. He had already unbuckled his belt and undone his jeans. When the video started, he was stroking up and down on his cock. You watched it all the way through and then played it again, bringing the phone up to your ear to see if he’d added any audio. And boy was there audio. He was telling you how beautiful you looked, how much he liked this little naughty side of you, and how much he wished he was there to take you into a bathroom himself and have his way with you.
You: Babe! This is hot…
Benny: Yeah?
Benny: You still alone?
You: Yeah…
Benny: Then show me how hot it got you
You bit your bottom lip, the slick pooling in between your legs. You needed to get some relief, so you leaned against the stall door and reached down into your underwear. Collecting the wetness, you thread your fingers up your folds to your clit, teasing it and wishing it was Benny’s fingers instead of yours. It wasn’t the best angle, but you took a quick photo to send him as you kept going. The next thing you knew, your phone vibrated in your hand. Benny was calling you.
You cleared your throat as you slid the talk button to answer, “Mhmm, yeah?”
He lets out a low grunt, “Fuck baby, you’re really getting yourself off in the bathroom stall aren’t you?”
“C-can’t help it, B, you…fuck…that video was so hot.”
“You thinking of me while you’re touching yourself?”
“Mmmhmm.” You shuddered a bit as you heard his low chuckle.
“I’m thinking of you too baby. Wishing I had you here with me.”
Despite the music bumping outside in the bar the bathroom was rather quiet so you were trying to stifle your moans to not alert any of the other patrons.
“Me too,” you whispered as you heard a group bust into the bathroom, cracking up and gossiping about who knows what. You figured Benny could hear the ruckus on the other side of the door.
“Guess we have company don’t we?”
“Y-yeah.”
“Ok, I know you can’t talk babe, don’t worry. Is it ok if I keep going?”
“Mmhmm.”
“Ok, and I need you to keep your fingers going too.” He let out a shaky breath, the breath you knew so well, which meant he was getting closer. “I’m so happy you took the day off tomorrow, we’re going to need to make up for some lost time.”
You let out a whimper, already anticipating what was in store for you. He continued to go into detail about the different ways he was going to take you apart and what he wanted you to do to him. Hearing him be so descriptive was new and unexpected. It didn’t take long before you heard his release on the other side of the phone. It was enough to push you over the edge as you bit your hand to stifle a moan.
Your legs felt like jelly and you were panting. It took a few moments for you to gather yourself and put the phone back to your ear. “Bun? You there?”
He took a deep breath, “Yeah. I’m here baby. Sorry, I kinda blacked out for a second,” he laughed. “Fuck, that was so hot.”
You giggled, “Yeah it was. Hey, I…uh…I should probably get back. And you too. I’ll text you when I get back to the room ok?”
“Yeah, sounds good. Have a good rest of your night. I love you.”
“Love you too.”
____________________________
Benny quickly cleaned himself up and threw his pants back on, rushing to return to the group outside. Before he went to open the patio door, he remembered the reason for his trip inside in the first place. He ran over to the refrigerator, grabbed a couple of cans of beer, and made his way back outside.
Santiago was the first to address him. “Jesus, Ben. I thought you left and went to the ABC store.”
“Nah, he was inside talking to his girl,” Will nodded with a smirk.
“Ohhhh. Well, you do look more relaxed Ben, good for you,” Santiago winked. “Looks like you missed a spot,” he pointed down to Benny’s T-shirt and the white spot near the bottom.
“Fuck,” Benny tried to wipe it away as the guys laughed.
“Just please tell me you went to your room, right?” Will asked as Santiago cracked up even more.
“Hey, hey, hey. You two are ones to talk,” Frankie chimed in, coming to Benny’s defense. Santiago scoffed and was about to reply before Frankie cut him off, “I know, me too. We’ve all had some uh…fun…with technology,” he smirked.
“I guess, I should make plans to stay over at Miranda’s tomorrow then, huh? Ow!” Will dodged an empty beer can that Benny playfully tossed at him.
________________________
You cleaned yourself up and weaved back through the crowd to get back to your booth. One of your cousins was regaling the group in a story so you thought you were able to slink back unnoticed. But your sister watched you like a hawk, a sly smile on her face. You rolled your eyes as she grabbed her drink and plopped down next to you.
“Sooo…feeling more relaxed?” She knocked your forearm with her elbow.
“How’d you know?”
“Bitch, seriously?! You were so,” you shushed her so she whispered the rest, “you were so fucking obvious. Pressing your thighs together. Takes one to know one sis,” she winked. “You forget that I was in a long-distance relationship for like a year. We had to get…creative.”
You brought your hands to your ears, “Ew stop, I don’t want to think of you two having phone sex!”
“Who had phone sex?” Mari perked up, which drew the attention of the group.
You wanted to sink into the couch and disappear as everyone’s eyes turned to you. “My mom is here Mari, what the fuck!”
“Oh stop it, mija! You’re a big girl. Besides, I want some grandkids!”
Everyone whooped and giggled as you buried your head in your hands, laughing at the ridiculousness of this whole situation.
#benny miller x reader#benny miller smut#benny miller fanfiction#benny miller x female reader#triple frontier fanfic#husband!benny miller x wife!reader
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Yknow what I don’t ever get to dive into this one, so for my own holiday fun, let’s elaborate on the ranger AU:
The girls are room mates, rivals for a long while, the tape line that divides their shared space like a battle zone.
Plum is obsessively neat about her books but otherwise is chaos, clothes everywhere, shoes scattered. Bed is about the only thing she makes and keeps clear to sit and work, desk is a mess of research notes and dog eared manuals. Her dratini is utter chaos, unruly doesn’t even describe how Missy is. Plum was raised in a very well off household but her family never came home, work keeping them almost completely busy. This leaves one girl who knows what she’s all about because she had to figure it out, plum is just as wild and chaotic as her Pokemon in her own snooty kind of way. Very particular teenager.
Meanwhile peach has never been allowed to be a kid, she was told what to do and when to do it, hobbies we’re chosen for her, free time used up working hard, training harder, her Pokemon just as pushed to keep up standards. The prodigal daughter put on a pedestal has nothing but pressure from day one. She doesn’t listen to music, have toys or hobbies, even her clothes are plain and not really things you’d fully expect a teenager to wear. She had to just go with her family always pushing her to do what they want and be who they expected. Failure was not met well. Her personal space is painfully tidy, purely because she doesn’t really have much to fill the space at the start. Val is volatile at best, but Bob keeps his sunny disposition, often out in the dorm room happily.
Plum soon realises peach has not developed a personal taste of her own, and cannot understand how that just never happened. So begins her task of getting peach to find things she likes and enjoys. None of her skills sound like things that excite her, peach is this dead pan teenager with no fire for anything. Her hot head rears up when she’s backed into a corner, so when pushed too hard peach snaps, she doesn’t know what she’s suppose to like or do, out of her family home she can only sit and watch others and try to assimilate quietly. A skill she’s quite good at, so most just assume she’s cold and distant by nature, an angry face leading to most leaving her alone.
Plum proceeds to open up a whole world of things for a teenager who never got the chance to just exist without an objective. Music, junk food, staying up late to play games or gossip. They sneak out to town, maybe they steal some overly sweet awful booze, maybe they hide it in their dorm to stay up and talk some nights. Plum gets peach to pick clothes she wants, tries to encourage her to care about anything noticing she’s got piercings, so like…punk?? Is that her thing? No clue, but it’s the total opposite to plums sporty preppy cute outfits, so together they look like night and day.
Their initial arguing and dislike of each other eases off fast, peach realises that maybe not everyone is so awful, and that she’s been stuck with a highly intelligent if not a little scatter brained girl who actually encourages her to live, not just simply exist. It is tentative steps into realising she is more than the weight of her family name.
Other dumb teenager things: peach pierces plums ears for her. Ranger team work tasks that the girls smash through. Late night dorm activities with the other students, you know, typical junk like spin the bottle and such.
Plum 100% is cocky and straightforward during a party and makes sure peach never lives down that she stole the grouchy girls first kiss, etched into her memory forever.
Peach realising “oh no. Very very not straight. Oh no.” To which she’s in deep denial and horrified, because her family CANNOT find out. Seeing as her mom likes to dig through her memories from time to time, peach is utterly terrified to go home.
Plum seeing her roommate return from a weekend back at her family house looking more exhausted and worn out than when she left. Never asks why, never pries, tries to be cheery and help peach not feel so crappy. Peach can’t ever tell her what she’s done, or the guilt she’s carrying around, and as they grow closer, it becomes harder to lie.
Then Booker happens, where the story line splits from canon to the ranger AU. Instead of peach taking the little mon and running, leaving plum without more than a ‘sorry’ and an old bangle on the dorm door handle, she instead cracks, can’t hide the truth anymore, packs up to leave, but can’t go without telling someone, anyone that she’s been a monster, and has to change. Has to do better than she had before. Through tears and drama the truth comes out, plum learns it all, and sees her best friend with a bag on her shoulder, running away.
Through a convincing speech and an understanding and grounded view on the situation plum gets peach to stay, with her, with the rangers, they’ll face it together. For once peach does not want to feel so alone, everything she’s ever done has been singular, even though she’s been surrounded by people pulling her strings, it’s never been because of care or love, just progress. ‘The family comes first’ echos in her mind, and she has to stop this cycle. So peach stays, is deathly afraid her family will hurt plum for getting involved, she hardly sleeps for a while, making sure the night is safe, that no one’s trying to tamper with the path she’s trying to stay on. A good one. A kinder one with less bloodshed.
Plum encouraged peach to take up boxing, for her anger, so she joins a club and finds a love for it. The gains begin, and plum is at every fight, shouting from the side lines. Peach loses a few and takes it really badly. Loss in her family is usually cause for punishment, for isolation or consequence. She expects the same from plum, shocked when it never comes. Her partner is nothing but worried bout the bruises, but seems very encouraging. This is not what was expected.
Plenty of later year teenage shenanigans. Usual suspects, figuring out things like future career options, sexuality, the parties, sneaking out, stress over exams, first hangovers, smoking a little pot after handing in final coursework as a celebration. Peach finds herself, but both girls find a family in each other. Thick as thieves, forever entangled in each others memories now.
The girls grow as rangers, have a few run ins with peach’s cousins but otherwise are left with only a few scars, scrapes and bruises, and eventually they graduate, top of their class none the less. The powerhouse duo that others couldn’t compete with.
Plums become the agile ranger she was meant to be, strategist, a woman who knows every option before you even take your first move, but she lacks practical instinct and brutality, which is peach’s area of expertise. It’s head and heart at it’s most perfect balance.
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I have so many little headcanons bout this alt set up, but I’m tired, it’s the holidays, and I wanted to blurt this one out. Sorry to all for putting up with me haha
Give me peach gut laughing for the first time and plum realising she’s totally mad for this person.
Give me ranger prom/graduation where they both dress up and get to sneak off and dance together.
Give me chaotic but perfectly drift compatible fights with them and their Pokemon.
Give me prank wars, makeup help, hair style tests, bad hair dye attempts, pizza hang outs.
Give me plum learning how to train Missy well with peach’s help.
Give me adoptive momma bears for Booker.
Give me them laughing so hard one of them nearly throws up at something so stupid and dumb.
Give me the moment that penny drops and they realise they can’t move forward without each other.
I am thriving on this.
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The Art of Etiquette Part 2 | Jeon Jungkook
Summary: You try to back out on being a debutant so you can stop taking lessons with Mr. Jeon but your mother is going to do everything she can to make you follow through
Paring: f!reader x Etiquette instructor Jungkook
Word Count: 2k~
Warnings: Like one cuss word but thats about it lol
a/n: Let me know how you guys are liking this! I was planning on posting this later but I wanted to see if posting around this time would be better :)
p.s. roughly edited lol
"Mom! Mom! Where are you?" I yell as soon as I get home. "I'm right here so please stop yelling, you know that there is no yelling in this household" she scolds. "Okay, then why did you yell at me when I got a bad grade on my midterm paper?" I throw in her face. "Watch your tone y/n I am still your mother" she retorts. "Now what is it?" she says quickly turning the conversation back to it's intended course.
"I can't do this" I say and start making my way to the living room with her soon trailing behind. "Do what?" she sighs once we've both sat down. "This whole debutante thing, it's not for me" I say hoping it would pacify her but knowing for a fact that would never happen. "You're doing it!" she says, wanting to end the conversation already.
"No I'm not!" I argue back "I'm not cut out for this thing. This life of high society and playing nice with strangers, pretending like you actually care about what they're talking about. I just can't pretend to be someone I'm not" I explain but unfortunately she'll have none of it. "Did something happen at your lessons today?" she asks, hoping to find the cause of my anxieties.
"Nothing happened" I huff, standing up and making my way to my room. "Obviously something happened since you always seem to have something to say about everything even at the most inopportune times" she says, obviously exacerbated by the memories. "Are you talking about the time I added staying alive to the set list at grandpa's funeral?" I question chuckling at the memory.
"See this is exactly why you need those lessons. It's time to grow up, and if you're not ready to do that yet then I'll just have you get a job and start paying your own tuition so you can learn on your own what it means to be an adult" she threatens. "James said that he would pay for my tuition if I decided I wanted to go back to college. You can't take that away from me!" I argue and stop in my tracks, surprised and upset that she would even stoop that low.
"Since you still feel the need to whine over small sacrifices such as these then it looks like we should probably start giving you some more responsibilities so you will grow up. Just take the damn lessons y/n, it would really make your father and I happy if we could introduce you to everyone properly" she explains softening her tone towards the end.
"But he-" I start, wanting to tell her what my instructor made me do but we're cut off by the sound of James getting home. "How are my two lovely ladies doing?" he asks while giving my mother a kiss on her temple. "Oh we're fine, y/n was just telling me how much she enjoyed her first lesson right?" she says giving me a stern face, daring me to say otherwise.
"Oh yeah they were great Mr. Jeon seems like a very nice man" I say giving him a half smile, forcing the answer out of myself. I hate lying to him, especially since he's been nothing but nice to me so far. A lot nicer than my mother that's for sure, so I would hate to mess things up with him.
"Well that's great news! Especially since he called me just now and asked if you would like to take more lessons with him. It seems like he's taken a special interest in you and wants to really make sure you're set up for success. Would that be something that you would like?" he asks, thankfully leaving the decision up to me but with the glare my mother is giving me it seems like from her point of view there's only one obvious answer for this question.
"That works for me. Whatever you both think would be best is be fine by me" I say, doing my very best to sound as genuine as possible even though I'm dying inside.
"Wonderful! He's asked if we could do three days of etiquette and two days of dance lessons during the week and on days closer to events we should do dance lessons on the weekend before the event as well. That schedule work out alright for you?" he asks while taking out his phone to no doubt sending a message to Matthew to contact Mr. Jeon tomorrow morning so he's prepared for my newly scheduled lessons as well.
"Yes that's fine but where will I be taking my dance lessons?" I question now confused as to why Mr. Jeon would speak to James about them as well. "Oh I didn't tell you?" he's your dance instructor as well" James says and leaves to his office to take a phone call.
"No fucking way am I dancing with that man" I say turning back to my mother once he's out of earshot. "Did he do something that made you feel uncomfortable?" she asks, just now deciding to finally ask why I didn't want to take the lessons. "No he's just a dick" I huff, crossing my arms over my chest.
"Really, that's the reason? What did you expect? He's meant to teach you to act like a lady and let's be honest, a nice sweet approach isn't going to work on you" she says and makes her way to who knows where, to do who knows what. With how big this house is it could honestly be anything.
~~~~~~~~
"So is he hot?" Jesse asks, clearly interested in how things went yesterday. "I mean I guess but he's too rude for me to even begin to pay attention to that" I huff, frustrated at the thought of him alone. "What's his name?" he asks, taking out his phone to look him up.
"I don't remember but his last name is Jeon" I say taking a bite out of my sandwich. "J-o-h-n?" he questions, confused at the unusual surname. "No J-e-o-n. I'm pretty sure he's Korean" I say and slide over to his side to see what he can dig up on him.
"Jeon Private Etiquette Tutor" he types in and hits enter. "Woah" both of us say, seeing how many articles and pictures of him with actors, CEOs and public figures. "This guy must be loaded" Jesse says, clearly stunned at who he's worked with. "And he's hot! Damn girl you really won if this Jungkook guy wants to see you five times a week" he says and keeps on clicking through everything he can get him hands on about him. "And seven days a week when there's some stupid event I have to go to" I groan just thinking about how many hours of my life I'm going to waste with him.
"He's only 27, I wonder if he's single" Jesse says winking at me. "For me or for you because you can have him" I scoff making him laugh. "No take backs! Well, unless he's straight. Then you can have him back. No matter how heartbreaking that might be" he says, wiping away fake tears. "Sorry to break it to you babe but he probably wouldn't go for either of us" I say placing a hand on his shoulder and getting up to leave.
"Hey! Where are you going? We don't start class for another half an hour" he yells after me. "I gotta go change since he wants me to be 'dressed like a lady' when I come and I won't have time after class" I yell turning to face him as I walk backward for a second. "Alright, have fun Barbie" he yells as I get further away to which I respond with a shake of my head as I make my way over to my car.
"Acceptable" he says taking in my form. "Although the hem is far too short" he says looking down at my legs again before looking back up and making eye contact with me. "It was all I could find on such short notice" I explain but unfortunately he isn't satisfied with my answer.
"Excuses will get you no where, you either do it or you don't. I'm sure you could have put in a little more effort into finding something more suitable if you had tried. Let's remedy the situation by the next class shall we?" he finishes off sarcastically before turning his back to me and walking over to the sound system in the corner of the room and I take the chance to stick my tongue out at him in retaliation.
"You do you realize there are mirrors in this room correct?" he asks, clearly not amused with what he had seen me doing. "My apologies Mr. Jeon" I settle on, not bothering to give an excuse this time. "But are you really?" he asks, walking back towards me slowly, his voice an octave lower, catching me off guard. "N-no" I answer truthfully, nervous with the way he stalks towards me with clear displeasure enveloping his entire existence.
He leans towards me talking directly into my ear, clearly using tactics to show his dominance over the situation. "Let us be honest with each other then. It would be a waste of both of our time if we were to do otherwise" he say sending shivers down my spine and I hate that it's something I couldn't have controlled even if I wanted to. "Is that clear?" he asks, his warm breath hitting my neck making my mind feel clouded, leaving me confused on how to respond to him leaving me only being able to nod in response.
"Good" he says leaning back, giving what I had hoped for was a little more room to breathe. "Next time use your words" he says tilting my chin up just as he had done at my last lesson. "Yes Mr. Jeon" I say quietly, leaving him satisfied with my cooperation and straightening back up to go back to what he had been working on.
'What the fuck was that? What the fuck was that? What THE FUCK was that?' I ask myself over and over and over again. I'm startled out of my circular train of thought and am met with what I can assume is some sort of waltz music running through the twin speakers on either side of the wall that the sound system is placed against.
"I can't dance" I voice out, sticking to my word and answering the question before he bothered to ask. "I thought as much, ballroom dancing is a lost art amongst the youth of your generation" he says adjusting a few more things before coming back over to me.
"You speak of my generation as if it was much younger in comparison to yours" I respond crossing my arms over my chest in defiance. "Were you perhaps curious enough to inquire about me?" he asks finally turning around to face me, making his way back over to me as he had done before, having caught me red handed leaving me changing my position, holding my hands together and having them rest against my thighs.
"I had just assumed based off of how youthful you look" I respond, giving him a forced compliment, not wanting to admit to what I had done. Well, really what Jesse had done but again he would see right through me. "Haven't we agreed to be honest with each other?" he questions reaching his hand out and easily pulling my hands apart. Placing one of mine on his shoulder and the other held in his hand, leaving his free one to rest on my waist.
"Do as I say and hopefully we'll come out of this without any injuries" he says practically daring me to make a mistake. "But of course" I say and straighten my posture to match his and follow his lead as best as I can.
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My god I just finished reading all of your moon boys as dads blurbs and holy shit
I was hoping you would write a blurb/one-shot where Marc just can't help but compare fem! reader (they have 2 sons) and his mother, but the reader doesn't act the way his mom would and that is slowly but surely healing him.
Maybe also where their younger boy gets hurt while playing with his brother and she calms their oldest by saying "It wasn't your fault, you didn't do it on purpose".
Poor Marc would definitely start crying as soon as they're alone.
Anyway, toodles!
Healing Wounds
Summary: Fatherhood was something that really healed Marc in a way that he couldn't imagine, and with that, situations are a lot less stress-inducing and let him enjoy finer moments with his family.
Warnings: Talk about Marc's trauma. Thoughts of self-doubt and being unable to let go of the past. Y/N and Marc (and the rest) being good parents. A whole lot of fluff at the end.
Author’s Snip: We love letting our man heal his mental and emotional wounds.
I’ll shut up now. Enjoy! And don’t be afraid to request.
Word Count: 859
It was kind of funny. Of course, you and him end up having two sons. It just had to happen like that didn't it. It wasn't like he didn't want them. God, no. Marc would never trade his boys for anything and he knows that neither would you.
But it was always there in the back of his mind. The faintest overlay in his vision and memory to back when he was a kid and all of its awful moments. All the screaming, crying, pain, and moments and milestones that were stained no matter how much he tried to scrub the bad out.
With your first, Aaron, there was the dread of being a parent and doing it wrong. He didn't want to get any of it wrong but there was the dilemma of where exactly he was meant to be. Too much of a pushover then his son would be spoiled and never get the hang of life. Too strict and demanding then he'd just be her. And Marc would rather die than even be her in the slightest. It was a hard thing for him to balance in his own mind. Marc was gone for a while but you all knew that it was for him to reflect and gather himself. Marc very much still had some wounds that he needed to lick before he took that journey.
And he did great. All three of them did great in their own ways but Marc clearly felt more comfortable and secure with himself being a dad and also working with you. You knew deep down that you were a part of that security, that the image was mostly on you. And you made sure that Marc never saw her in you even once. It's not like you were planning too, of course. You couldn't even imagine doing such things, or how any mother could have the audacity.
But when Matthew, or Matty as you all call him, came along there was a new dilemma that brought on more thoughts that wouldn't leave him alone. But Marc knew that Aaron and you managed to heal those wounds, so he knew that this would heal up so much more. He just needed to believe in himself and you, and the process.
Marc had the usual talk that a parent would with a soon-to-be older sibling, the whole "Just because we're having another one and are giving them more attention doesn't mean we don't love you. They just need more attention because they're small". Aaron understood, matter of fact he seemed really excited to be an older brother. Marc took that and made it something to use for healing. You and him taught Aaron how to help take care of Matthew and how to hold him, letting him be a part of his baby brother's life.
Years went by and they both grew, you bought a house, Marc started feeling better, and everything felt perfect. Sure, there were some moments but they never really impacted anything. There was no fear, no nights spent laying awake worrying about something happening, no moments where the ghosts of a past long since passed showed up in his mind.
That was until one day when everything was seemingly normal. You were doing something, Marc wasn't really paying attention and also couldn't remember what he was doing either. The boys were playing in the backyard. But at some point, you both hear a scream and then a cry coming from the backyard.
Rushing out, you find Matthew sitting on the grass crying and holding his foot while Aaron is kneeling next to him and looks upset and panicked. You go and pick up Matthew while Aaron is repeating "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to." and possibly about to cry himself. That's when it all gets Marc, and hard.
He feels overwhelmed by everything, but just before it gets too much he sees you try and settle your boys down. "What happened?" you asked Aaron calmly while holding Matthew who was sniffling into your shoulder. "We were playing soccer and he was going to get the ball in my goal so I tried to stop him, but I didn't know where his foot was so when I kicked he fell." Aaron explains as he starts to cry. You kneel down to his eye level, "Hey, it's okay, sweetie." you shush, "Was it an accident?" you ask. Aaron nods as he whips his tears. "Okay, then it wasn't your fault. You didn't mean to trip him." you say as you help him whip away his tears. "Are you okay, Matty?" you ask the smaller boy to which he nods.
"Alright. Then why don't we just hug it out and maybe sit down for a little or do something inside, yeah?" you suggest. The two boys immediately go in for the group hug, but you glance up at Marc, seeing him watch the whole thing, and gesture for him to join in. Marc, trying to hold back the water in his eyes, joins in. It lasts a few seconds but Marc can feel the situation healing up something again.
#moon knight#moonknight#moon knight x reader#moonknight x reader#marc spector#marc spector x reader#dad!marc spector
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