#the result of their team up could have ended exactly the same as canon | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

herrmannhalsteadproduction · 6 months

Text

500 Miles (Chapter Twelve)

Summary: This is Part Nineteen of my series A Herrmann/Halstead Production. It is an AU where Christopher Herrmann's mom had an affair with Pat Halstead resulting in a baby. The series follows this OC character (Rebecca "Bex" Herrmann) as she grows up and gets to know her brothers and the various Chicago teams. It is very much an AU, just to underscore that. It doesn't follow the same timeline and characters will follow different paths.

Click here for the Series Rundown where you can find the links to read all of the previous installments (which I highly recommend you do so that this one makes sense.)

Rating: Teen and Up

Relationships: Christopher Herrmann & Original Female Character, Jay Halstead & Original Female Character, Will Halstead & Original Female Character, Jay Halstead & Will Halstead, Greg 'Mouse' Gerwitz/Original Female Character, Will Halstead/Connor Rhodes, Assorted OC Couples

Warnings: Angst, Emotional Conversations, Dealing with Past Trauma, Swearing, Discussions of Past Drug Use, Discussions of Addiction

A/N: To underscore my previous note, this is an alternate universe so things have unfolded differently. This will not follow the canon arcs exactly by any means. But I hope you'll still enjoy it!

Chapter One Chapter Two Chapter Three Chapter Four Chapter Five Chapter Six Chapter Seven Chapter Eight Chapter Nine Chapter Ten Chapter Eleven

Chapter Twelve

Wednesday, August 12th

***

Bex

Bex stared at the calendar in the kitchen. Saturday the 15th was circled in red with ‘Emery’s move-in day!’ scribbled inside it.

Three more days.

Well, more like two and a half since today was well into the late afternoon.

Footsteps entered the room and then Emery’s arms were wrapping around her as she rested her chin on Bex’s shoulder. “Are you sighing at the calendar again?”

“No.” There had been no sighing. Not yet.

“Ah, just staring at it morosely then,” Emery said, letting her go as she went to the counter and put the kettle on.

“Meditatively, not morosely,” Bex corrected her. She grabbed a couple of mugs from the cupboard, ignoring Emery’s pointed look. “I’ve mostly come to terms with it all, but I reserve the right to have the occasional moment.”

“That’s fair.” Emery nodded. Though she still dug out one of the hidden cookie stashes to have with their tea. She could read a vibe.

The two of them caught up over their drinks, the week having already been jam-packed considering it was only Wednesday. Bex filled Emery in on her latest training session with Hailey and Julie. Jay and Sam were still helping out, but they’d had a special guest yesterday.

“Antonio,” Emery said slowly, wracking her brain. “That’s…Gabi’s brother?”

“Yes, good memory!” Bex had told her about everyone often enough, but her gang was pretty expansive. It was a lot of names to keep track of. “He hasn’t been around much since he took that job with the State Attorney’s office so it was great to see him. Plus, he had a ton of tips for me and exercises to help work on my speed.”

Emery raised her eyebrows at her over the rim of her mug. “Sounds like you’re gonna be pretty lethal soon enough.”

“Lethal is pushing it,” Bex scoffed. “I’ll settle for semi-dangerous. Enough to make someone think twice, you know?”

“That’s a solid goal,” Emery said. “Did you end up smacking this Antonio guy around as much as you have been with Jay and Sam?”

Bex laughed. “Yes,” she said. “And he had a great time, thank you very much.”

“Kinky,” Emery whispered and Bex threw a cookie chunk at her.

“He said we’re having way more fun over at the precinct than he is with a bunch of lawyers,” Bex said. “I think he wants to come back.”

“Going off of some of Jay’s stories, they do seem to have abnormally high levels of excitement over there on a daily basis. And that’s not even counting your fight club.” Emery rose and took their mugs over to the sink, rinsing them out. “Let’s get going. I don’t want to be late.”

They had a band practice tonight. They’d been trying to fit more in so Isaac could really get comfortable as their new bass player before they took on any new gigs. Emery had taken over from Ben as manager of their band and she was taking her duties seriously. “Come on, come on,” she said as she steered Bex out of the kitchen. “Grab your stuff!”

Very seriously.

They were the first ones at their rehearsal space by about twenty minutes, but Bex didn’t mind. It gave Emery a chance to get herself organized and Bex took the time to do some stretches. This training was still leaving her a stiff, hurting unit. She needed to limber up if she was going to bounce around, singing and playing her guitar.

Sam, Devon, and Isaac arrived next followed by Kira and Malia. Emery gathered them all in a circle for their band meeting.

“Check in time,” she said. “How’s everyone feeling about how practices have been going? Ready for any gigs yet? I’ve got a lead on a few, but no pressure.”

Isaac shrugged shyly. “I feel like I’m getting the hang of things, but you guys are gonna be a better judge of that than I am…”

“You’re doing great, babe,” Devon said, leaning in to kiss his cheek while Sam gave him a squeeze from the other side.

“Definitely fitting right in,” Kira agreed.

“We’re gelling for sure,” Bex said. Their last rehearsal had been pretty tight. “If everyone’s cool with it, I think we could start booking again?”

The rest of them nodded and Emery’s eyes lit up as she made some notes in her phone. “Awesome,” she said. “I’ll put some feelers out and let you know what comes up.” She tapped her phone against her knee as she chewed on her lip, eyeing them all carefully.

“Spit it out, girl,” Malia said, tactful as always. She reached out to prod at Emery with her foot, poking at her until she caved.

“I’ve been doing a lot of research and checking out the different venues and types of bands playing for what rates,” Emery began. “I know this started as a fun way to make some extra cash and it’s simpler to be a cover band, but I was wondering…” She looked around at the six of them, a hopeful smile growing on her face.

“What do you guys think about actually writing your own music?”

Everyone’s eyes went wide and then Bex coughed, slowly raising her hand.

“…is this a good time to say I might have some stuff to share?”

***

Thursday morning

***

Connor

If Connor had to name his favourite part about staying over at Casa Herrmannstead, aside from spending time with Will, it was probably this. Getting to join in on the Will and Bex runs.

It was like watching his very own morning show.

“It’s so earlyyyyyyyyy.”

“It’s a pretty normal hour for those of us who weren’t out late at band practice,” Will said, shaking his head at Bex and sharing a grin with Connor.

“Why won’t you just let me live, Will?” Bex whined as she trailed after them down the path.

Will turned to face her, jogging backwards slowly. “You haven’t been out for a run in ages—”

“Because I’m training and doing weight-lifting crap and going on walks,” she exclaimed. “The human body is only intended to endure so much.”

“We’re doing one circuit,” Will countered, blocking her way when she started to veer toward a bench. “That’s nothing.”

Bex groaned for longer than Connor thought should be possible without taking a breath. “This is cruel and unusual—”

“We’re getting pancakes after,” Will said, rolling his eyes at her antics.

“Oh!” Bex perked up. “Why didn’t you say so?” She picked up her speed, blowing past both of them. “Come on, slowpokes!”

Connor bit back a laugh as Will nearly tripped over his own feet as he tried to turn around and chase after her all at once.

“Did she just—Bex!” Will took off and Connor followed easily enough. He kept pace enough to stay close, but far enough back to make sure Will would beat out Bex for the final race.

That was his favourite part of the show after all.

***

Bex

She almost cried when she read the text from Mouse.

Could they push their walk to later this evening? Abso-freaking-lutely.

Pancakes had not cured everything that ailed her after all and Bex had a date with her ice packs and then the tub. Or possibly the other way around. Or both at the same time.

She hadn’t decided yet.

She’d actually had a great time with Will and Connor this morning despite the freakishly early hour. Will was right—it had been way too long since they’d been able to go on a run together. However, it did add up to way too much exercise in her life.

Even if it was self-inflicted.

But yes, an extra couple of hours to get body and soul back together wasn’t something she was about to argue with. And then she got to see Mouse which was an extra win.

“Okay, Bex, you can do this.” She tried to hype herself up before getting up off of her bed and then whimpered at the twinges it set off. She looked over at Kol who was lounging beside her. “I don’t suppose you could somehow piggy-back me to the bathroom?”

He snorted and smushed his face back into the mattress.

“Fair enough.”

***

Mouse

Mouse had been half hoping that Bex would suggest rescheduling their walk for another day when he texted her about pushing it back. Voight had asked him to stay late to set up the new computers that just arrived in Intelligence and it felt like a last-minute reprieve. He texted Bex.

Crossed his fingers.

And sighed when he got her chirpy reply of ‘No problem! It’s summer, we’ve got tons of daylight to work with. See you at 7!’

Great. So, he still had a few hours to try and figure out how to have this talk. The one they had to have, but…a recap of his history with addiction wasn’t exactly something he could easily slide into a conversation.

It was time though. They’d reached the point where he couldn’t let them get any further without laying everything all out for her. It just—it wasn’t right otherwise.

Mouse bit back another sigh and focused on his work, futilely trying not to keep one eye on the weighted countdown of the clock at the same time.

He finished up by quarter after six, managing to get home to freshen up and leave in time to meet Bex. She’d suggested a new spot around the other side of the park that apparently had a path that led down by the water for a nice view. Hopefully that meant benches too. He’d sit her down before they got too far from the exit, tell her everything, and then…if she wanted to leave, at least she was close to the parking lot.

She and Kol were waiting when he arrived; Kol doing his little ‘ready to go’ dance. “Hey,” Mouse said as he walked up to them.

A slow grin spread across Bex’s face. “Hey! Glad you could still make it,” she said.

“Yeah, I, uh, I got worried I was cutting it close when I had to keep explaining to Olinsky that his new unit would still have solitaire on it,” Mouse said, huffing out a little laugh. Took ten minutes and a full demonstration to convince him.

“Man’s got his priorities,” Bex said, nodding sagely. She started toward the path before halting and narrowing her eyes at him, letting out a quiet hum. “You look like you could use some maintenance.”

Some maintenance—what? Oh. Right. She held her arms open with a little smile and Mouse—he couldn’t even fight it. He stepped into the hug, wrapping his arms around her and sinking into her when she did the same. There was a weight against his legs as Kol leaned against him.

The tension in his shoulders began to melt away and Mouse was beginning to think that Bex had a point about this maintenance thing. He held on for as long as he thought he could get away with before reluctantly letting her go.

“Wait until you see this spot,” she said, eyes bright as she got them moving. “Kol and I have been there a few times and it’s gorgeous.” Kol boofed his agreement. He pulled Bex forward, dragging her along by the leash and she reached with her free hand to grab Mouse’s.

He was going to talk to her soon. He was. But for now…

He held on tight.

***

Bex

Mouse was being weird. She was trying to suss out exactly what flavour of weird he was being, but she hadn’t managed to narrow it down yet. Was he quiet because of the long day? Or because he was gearing himself up to talk to her about stuff.

She wished there was a way to make this all easier for him, but it was really one of those things where the only way out was through. He had things he needed to tell her and the best thing she could so was listen.

Which she would, when he was ready.

In the meantime, she could at least show him this cool spot and hopefully make him smile. She and Kol hadn’t been on this path at this time on a Thursday, but Bex was hoping that their surprise guest was a creature of habit when it came to their own walk schedule.

They’d made it down to the path by the water and were walking along, enjoying the quiet. Well, Bex and Kol were enjoying the quiet. Bex had her fingers crossed that Mouse wasn’t just silently panicking beside her. She was contemplating breaking the silence when Kol froze.

Right on cue, he tilted his head to the side, eyes staring off into the middle distance.

“What is it, boy?” Bex crouched down beside him. “Wolves?”

“Wolves?” Mouse snorted above them. Bex looked up to see him fighting back a smile. “Bex,” he began and she held up a finger.

A lone howl came piercing across the water.

Bex grinned as Mouse’s eyes widened. Kol tipped his head back, letting loose a howl of his own and within a few seconds, the first howler returned his call.

“What is that?” Mouse peered out at the path, face scrunched up with confusion.

“There’s a husky who always walks here around this time and sings the song of her people,” Bex laughed. “She and Kol made friends. They do this back and forth—” She pointed down at Kol who howled again. “—until they meet up on the path.”

Mouse smiled at the slightly louder howl that came back at them.

“It’s fun,” Bex said. “Come on, try it.” She cupped her hands around her mouth and howled as loud as she could. Then she waggled her eyebrows at Mouse until he caved and joined in.

They howled until they were out of breath from laughing so hard.

Kol’s friend and her owners had become visible on the path a few moments ago. Now they were close enough that Kol was tugging at his leash, trying to get close enough to say hi. Bex let him drag them forward and did the introductions while the two dogs were busy sniffing and tussling.

“Anya, Carol,” Bex said, gesturing toward the older couple. “This is my friend Mouse. Mouse, this is Anya and Carol, keepers of Ms. Brigitte.” She pointed at the young husky who was currently kicking Kol’s ass at their play fight. He didn’t look like he minded.

“Sounded like Bex and Kol roped you into their shenanigans,” Anya said to Mouse with a knowing smile. Carol gave a not-so-subtle thumb’s up to Bex at the same time. “I swear, I keep waiting to see articles questioning whether or not Chicago’s got a new wolf population.”

“We can’t help it,” Bex exclaimed. “Brigitte brings out our wild sides.”

“Something tells me it doesn’t take much coaxing,” Carol laughed. She looked over at Mouse. “You better keep an eye on this one.”

Mouse held his hands up. “I’m just along for the ride.”

“Smart man,” Anya said, nodding approvingly. They let the dogs play for a bit longer before breaking up the love fest and carrying on down their opposite sides of the path.

Kol took the lead, walking at a more sedate pace this time. Mouse was quiet once more and Bex reached out to grab his hand again.

“What do you think?” she asked and he turned to her, startled out of his thoughts. “Wanna run away? Join the wolves?”

His lips quirked up at that. “You? Living in the wilderness?”

“Hey, I could forage,” Bex argued. “For example, I spotted a new food truck by the parking lot that had donuts. We could see if it’s still open when we get back.”

“Would we call that foraging?” Mouse squinted at her. “And don’t wolves hunt?”

“Foraging, hunting, semantics, whatever.” Bex shrugged. “It’s food located outside and there’s trees out here so we’ll call it the wilderness and I found the food, technically, so yes. I’d be fine.”

“…I have so many questions about that entire statement,” Mouse said, looking half-horrified, half-fascinated, and thoroughly entertained.

They debated the different ways they could make it out in the ‘wilderness’ and who could join their wolf pack and before they knew it, they were back at the parking lot…

Where there was indeed a donut food truck.

Bex dug out her wallet and handed Mouse Kol’s leash. “Excuse me while I go provide for our pack,” she said, smiling at his soft chuckle behind her as she went over to the truck.

A delicious amount of donuts later, they were walking back to their cars. Mouse had seemed fully relaxed before, but sometime between finishing their snack and getting to their cars, he’d tensed up again.

“Hey,” Bex said, getting his attention. “Thanks for still making time for a walk today. It was fun.” He nodded, smiling his little smile, but his eyes had gone distant again. Bex reached out and gave him a gentle hug. “We need to work you up to your daily quota.”

Mouse huffed a little laugh against her shoulder, patting her back before pulling away. “Building up my tolerance?”

“I told you,” she said, reaching up to smooth away the little furrow on his forehead. “It’s all very scientific.” She opened the back door of the Tin Can to let Kol hop inside. “I’ll see you on Saturday?”

“Mm, right,” Mouse said. “The big move-in day. Yeah, I’ll be there with Ed to get things set up.”

“Thank you—again—it’s so great of you guys,” Bex said. She opened her own door and gave him a little wave before sitting down. “See you then.”

He waved back, waiting by his own car and watching until she’d made it out of the parking lot.

“I think that went okay,” Bex said, peeking at Kol in her rearview mirror. He was already asleep. What a bum. Oh, well, she could debrief with herself. They might not have talked about anything tonight, but she’d gotten Mouse to come out of shell or funk or whatever and they’d had fun.

“Yeah, I think that was good.”

***

Mouse

Mouse dropped his hand to his side as Bex’s car drove out of sight.

He was a fucking coward.

***

Bex

Friday night, Bex had volunteered to cover the bar with some of their back up staff so that Chris and everyone could go to Shay and Tay’s housewarming party for their new place. It had been super hard for them to co-ordinate schedules so part of Bex’s gift to them was taking this shift so they could have this moment. She’d go and have a little mini-tour of her own down the road.

Of course, a fair chunk of their gang ended up back at Molly’s before the night was done and lined up to show her all the pictures they’d taken so it was kind of like she’d been there anyway.

What a bunch of dorks.

God, she loved them.

***

Saturday, August 15th…MOVING DAY

***

Emery

Emery took a deep breath as the flurry of activity swirled around her.

Today was the day. She was officially moving in to her own place. Standing on her own two feet. It was a little bit terrifying, but mostly…it felt freaking amazing.

“Coming through!” Devon made a ‘beep beep’ noise as he swept past her carrying a part of her bed frame.

“Babe, make sure you put that part against the wall so it’s out of the way,” Sam called out as he followed behind hefting another piece of frame.

Her tiny house was tiny bit crowded right now and Emery was loving it. She dropped the box she’d been hauling on the kitchen counter, smiling to herself. A few months ago, she never would have believed she could be this lucky.

She had a new start and a whole gang of friends helping her grab hold of it.

Devon, Sam, and Isaac had shown up along with Malia and Kira. And Bex, of course, with her gang in tow. Will, Connor, and Jay were unloading the truck while Mouse and his friend Ed were hard at work on her slightly intimidating new security system. And Lexi had offered to help, showing up with a smile and willing arms. Emery had been a bit surprised by how well the two of them had clicked, but enjoying the growing friendship between them.

She had to remember to set up a coffee date for the two of them with Kira and Malia before the day was done. Take a page out Bex’s book and blend the friend groups.

All of the unloading and unpacking was going way faster than Emery had expected—although most of her calculations had been based on her doing most of this stuff on her own after everyone left. She hadn’t really expected them to stick around and set stuff up and build what needed to be built and organize things.

It was a little bit overwhelming, honestly. In a good way, but still. An arm dropped over her shoulder as she swiped at her eyes and a tissue appeared in front of her face.

“Ask me how I know you let Bex help you pack,” Will said, smiling down at her as she accepted the tissue.

Emery was almost afraid to ask. She loved Bex, but the girl was both notional and easily distracted. “How?”

“I found the tissues inside of a box marked emergency moving supplies,” he said. “It also had a container of cookies, socks, a fork, a tampon, dog treats, my toothpaste, a twenty-dollar bill, a pack of gum, what I am ninety-percent sure is one of Connor’s travel mugs, and a package of underwear.”

“I mean…” Emery waved a hand as she laughed, touched and a bit teary all over again. “That covers a lot of emergencies.”

“Yes, it does,” Will said. “Bless her heart.” He gave Emery a squeeze before letting her go. “Come on, this place is starting to look pretty amazing. Let’s finish getting it in shape for you.”

They left the kitchen and came across Connor creeping in with a box that Emery knew she hadn’t packed up. It didn’t have Bex’s scrawling hand-writing on it anywhere either. She peered at him. “What did you buy?”

Connor’s eyes went wide as he tried to hide it behind himself and shuffle down the hallway. “Nothing,” he said. “Just a thing. It’s tiny, really—”

“Let me see.” Emery tried to get around him and he took off running. “Connor!” His cackles echoed down the hall as she chased after him.

***

Ed had been trying to find an opportunity to talk to Mouse and see how things were going with Bex, but the whole day had been too busy and full of people so far. They’d had passengers in the truck with them on the ride over and now at the house, every room and hallway had someone either carrying something or unloading it.

“Hey, guys!” Bex popped her head into the hallway where they were working on setting up the control panel. “I’m taking coffee orders. Want anything?”

“Just a regular would be great,” Ed said and Mouse nodded. “Thank you.”

“No, thank you,” she said, leaning against the wall. “What you’re doing here? I can’t thank you enough.”

“We’re happy to do it, Bex,” Mouse said quietly. The two of them shared a look and yeesh, Ed kind of felt like he was intruding a bit. Okay. He was definitely cornering this kid to get a progress report because that was not a ‘there’s been no progress’ kind of look.

But it also wasn’t a ‘we recently talked about your addictions and have a new understanding of each other’ kind of look.

Hmm.

He found his moment when they went out to the truck for some more tools. Mouse headed for the flatbed and Ed grabbed his arm, yanking him all the way around to the other side, away from the house.

“Ed, wha—”

“How’s it going with Bex?” They didn’t have time for small talk, not when they could get interrupted at any moment. “You talk to her yet?”

Mouse gave him a flat stare and then dragged a hand down his face. “No,” he groaned. “Okay? No, I have not talked to her yet. I’ve tried—I plan it all out and then, I just, I can’t do it.”

“You’re working yourself up again,” Ed said and Mouse gripped the side of the truck bed.

“It’s worth getting worked up about, don’t you think?” Mouse snapped at him. “Kind of a big deal. We’ve talked about it and you guys have all of these suggestions and whatever, but none of you actually know how she’s going to react. These last few weeks—” He cut himself off, jaw going tense.

Ed leaned up against the cab and waited until Mouse met his eyes. “What about ‘em? Tell me.”

“They’ve been—they’re making me greedy,” Mouse said, voice tight. “I want everything. With her. And yet I can’t stop thinking about what being with me will do to her.”

Two steps forward, three steps back. That was the constant dance with Mouse. No wait, that wasn’t fair. It was more three steps forward, two steps back. Kid had come a long way to even be trying for something with Bex. To be allowing himself a glimpse of happiness.

Now Ed had to figure out how to stop him from closing the door.

“What are you worried it’ll do to her?” Ed asked and Mouse just gave him a look. Right.

Everything they’d all been worried about with their own partners. Ed knew all that, he just wanted Mouse to say it so they could talk it out. Brainstorm and all that. But they both knew there was really only one person for him to talk it out with to truly set his fears to rest.

Ed clapped a hand on Mouse’s shoulder and gave it a squeeze. “Communication,” he said. “It’s the only way through all of this.” He held Mouse in place before he could shake him off. “I’m serious. You go over all of the worse case scenarios with her and get it all out in the open. Make a plan if it makes you better. You know as well I as do that nothing’s a failsafe, but there’s some good options out there.”

Setting Bex up with a support group of her own would be a good start. He made a mental note to ask Chuck if he had any recommendations.

“Make a plan,” Mouse repeated softly.

“Talk it out, okay?” Ed patted him a few times before letting him go. “I think Bex might surprise you.” He’d been impressed with at the Grudge Match and honestly, combined with every thing else Ed knew about her…he had the feeling she could handle whatever Mouse threw at her. She had so far. “You and her…you’ve got something good,” Ed said. “Something that could be great. Don’t let it slip away, Mouse.”

“I—yeah, I, uh, I know and I’m really trying not to,” Mouse said. He nodded and then turned to start grabbing what they needed out of the truck. “Thanks, Ed.”

“Anytime, bud.”

***

Mouse

That night, Mouse sat working on his latest needlepoint project, thinking about worst case scenarios and plans and options. Turning every painful edge over in his brain.

By the time the sun came up, his project was done and he had an idea.

He just had to convince Bex it was the right one.

***

Bex

Mouse was waiting when she and Kol got to the park on Sunday afternoon. They were back at their usual spot—she was kind of loving that they had a usual spot—and he was pacing a bit in front of the entrance.

His hair was a mess, like he’d been running his hands through it and he was playing with something in his hands, flipping it over and back again. Hunh. He definitely seemed a bit…frazzled.

Bex’s stomach did a little dip. Maybe today was the big talk day.

Okay.

That was okay.

They could get through it. They’d gotten through worse, hadn’t they? She honestly didn’t believe that Mouse could tell her anything about his past that would make her walk away from him.

From them.

So. Okay. She squared her shoulders and got out of the car. If today was the day, she was ready. Bex got Kol out from the back seat and headed over to Mouse. “Hey!”

He startled a bit, stopping in his tracks. “Hey, Bex, hi, welcome.” He winced and shook his head. “Um, this is for you,” Mouse said, thrusting his hand out.

She accepted the round object and realized it was a little needlepoint in a round frame with a hook on the top—oh, an ornament! He’d made her an ornament. Bex brought it closer for a better look. It had Mouse and her and Kol as little 8-bit characters howling, with a stylized ‘awooo!’ stretching toward the moon in the top right corner.

It was amazing.

“Mouse,” she said softly, meeting his eyes.

“I know how much you like Christmas,” he said, scratching at the back of his neck. “And I just, I thought, you know…it’s a good memory.”

“It is,” she agreed. “Thank you.” Bex gave him a hug before giving the ornament one last look and setting it carefully in her bag. She was about to ask him what had prompted that and when he’d had time to make it, but he was already turning toward the path, ready to go.

Maybe ready wasn’t exactly the right word.

Determined. Braced.

Not really the vibe of their previous walks, but again, the only way out was through. She followed him and they stepped onto the path. Kol trotted ahead, doing a great job of powering through the awkwardness. Mouse swayed a bit in her direction, his hand twitching like he wanted to grab hers, but he stopped himself. Bex closed the distance and took his hand instead.

There was the barest hitch in his breath.

Then he squeezed her hand once and kept a hold of it while they walked. He still didn’t start talking though until they’d been on the path for about five minutes and came across an empty bench in a shady area. He led her over to take a seat.

Bex sat down.

Mouse did not.

“So, I have to tell you some stuff,” he said, starting up his pacing again. “And I need you to just listen at first, okay?”

“Absolutely,” she agreed. “I’m here.”

“Okay.” He kneaded his fingers together for a bit, pacing some more before he came and sat beside her. Kol whined softly; resting his head on Mouse’s knee. Mouse huffed out a tiny laugh and scratched behind Kol’s ears. “Okay,” he whispered before finally looking up at Bex.

“You know I’m an addict,” he said, diving right straight into it apparently. Bex nodded and Mouse continued on. “It started when I was in high school,” he said. “Not so much alcohol as party drugs. Pretty much anything I could get my hands on and forget about my life for awhile.”

She remembered him touching on that part of his life briefly when he told her about his parents. Bex found her heart breaking all over again for a young and lonely Mouse.

“I kept telling myself I had it under control, you know.” He scrubbed a hand through his hair again. “I mean, I got into school and then I made it into the Rangers and had it together enough for that. Was totally sober the whole time I was enlisted. Made me think I could pick it up and put it down whenever I wanted to, but that—that wasn’t how it went.”

Mouse focused on petting Kol for a bit before he started up again. “When we got discharged, there had been so much shit over there…things we’d seen and done…it was like, as soon as I stopped moving for a second, it all hit me. And I was back to wanting to forget for awhile.” He shook his head. “But it took more and more to forget and I spiralled. Bad.”

He looked up suddenly, blue eyes piercing into her. “I was doing hard drugs. Anything I could swallow, snort, or shoot. And I was doing anything I could to get those drugs. I committed crimes,” he said. “I fucking stole money from Jay. More than once.” His lips twisted as he took in her face. “Never told you that, did he?”

“I think he considers this your story to tell,” Bex said carefully. Even when Jay was trying to warn her off, he never crossed any lines like that. This was for Mouse to share and Mouse alone.

“He still helped me,” Mouse said. “It cost him, but he did it. Brought me clean needles, checked up on me, brought me food. I’m insanely lucky that I came out of that time without any diseases, but Jay was also a big part of that. I—I probably would have died if he hadn’t been around.”

True or not, Bex could hardly stand to think about it. A world where she’d never had a chance to know Mouse? A world where Jay lost his best friend? She couldn’t stop the soft noise that came out at those thoughts.

Mouse scanned her face, every line of his own pulled down with unbearable sadness. “It cost him and it hurt him,” he said. “And I never forget that. I hurt a lot of people. People I don’t even know and who I’ll never be able to make it up to. That’s something I’ve got to live with.” Mouse sighed. “You know I work on it, with my group and I’m trying to let some things go.”

Bex nodded encouragingly. God, she was so proud of him for that. For sticking with it and trying and finding such an amazing group of people and letting them in. It was such a huge thing. Sometimes she thought he didn’t even realize how huge it was.

“I need you to know all of this because my past is part of the whole package here,” Mouse said. “There’s always a risk that my past could become my present again.”

She knew that. It wasn’t like Bex was walking into this completely unprepared. She’d been doing research and educating herself. She wasn’t sure if she was still in the just listening part of this conversation though and she’d promised. She reached out to take Mouse’s hand instead.

He turned her hand over, holding it in both of his. “I’ve been thinking about all of this stuff a lot,” he said. “And about us.” Mouse sighed, bringing her hand up to give it quick kiss and touching their joined hands to his forehead before setting hers back in her lap. “I want this to work, Bex. I want us to work,” he said. “Everyone keeps telling me that it’ll be okay and to go for it, but all I’ve been able to see are the worst-case scenarios.”

That sounded…not like a direction she was hoping for. “What are you saying, Mouse? Do you—do you want to stop? Or—”

“No,” he said immediately. Firmly. “That’s the last thing I want, but at the same time, how—how can I build a life with you knowing there’s every possibility it’ll be destroyed?”

Okay, that was—Bex couldn’t just let that sit. “Mouse—” She took a breath and slowed down so she didn’t jump all over that. “You relapsing is one single possibility that could affect our relationship. One of us could get sick. One of us could get in a car accident or be shot or have an aneurysm. Do we not go forward because we don’t know what the future holds?”

“No,” Mouse said. “But we can make a plan. People have medical instructions in place and I think we should have a plan in case I relapse.”

That made a sort of sense. “What are you suggesting?” Bex asked, thinking maybe it was something involving his group, like people she could contact who could offer support or—

Mouse took a deep breath. “If I relapse,” he said. “I want you to walk away.”

Bex shook her head, sure she hadn’t heard that right. “You want me to what?”

“Walk away,” he repeated, like he wasn’t asking the most impossible thing of all.

***

Mouse

It was the only thing that made sense. The only way he could be sure that she’d be safe and not dragged down into whatever mess he might get himself into. She had to see that—

“What the hell, Mouse?” Bex shot to her feet, fury and betrayal flying through every syllable. “Walk away? Like none of this—like you mean nothing to me? I can’t do that.”

“I’m not saying it would be easy, but for the best.” The fact that it would destroy Mouse couldn’t be part of the equation.

“The best for whom?” Bex cried, throwing her hands out. “For you? I don’t think so. And I don’t know how you could think it would be the best for me—how I could even do that?”

Mouse tried to explain, but she sliced a finger through the air at him. “My turn,” she said. “Think about what you’re saying, Mouse. If you got cancer or some kind of permanent injury at work, would you expect me to walk away from you then?” She took one look at his face and scowled. “Oh, jesus christ, don’t even fucking answer that,” she said. “Okay, turn it around. What if something happened to me? What if I got sick or hurt or developed an addiction? You gonna take your own advice and walk away?”

He couldn’t meet her eyes, couldn’t say it—they both knew the answer.

“What makes it different?” Bex sat down beside him again and grabbed his hand, making him look at her. “Why should I deserve care and compassion and you don’t? God, forget about the romantic side of things for a minute—you’re my friend, Mouse. First and foremost. Even if we weren’t…us, I would do everything I could to help you.”

“That’s the problem,” Mouse blurted out, desperately wanting her to see the core of it. “I feel like there’s a part of you that thinks that if you lo—if you care about me enough, that’ll see us through anything.”

“It’s gotten us this far, hasn’t it?” Bex gave him a hopeful little shrug.

“When I’m in the middle of it all, I’m like a black hole,” Mouse said, pulling his hand back, trying to keep a bit of distance so he could think—so he could say it right. “You’d be pouring yourself out until there’s nothing left.”

“That would be my choice,” she said. “You can’t make it for me.”

“I have to!” He scrubbed a hand over his face, willing her to understand. “Because it’s for me too, Bex,” he said. “If I spiral and somehow manage to make it through to the other side again, I’m not going to be able to live with myself knowing you had a front row seat. Knowing I hurt you.”

“You think I couldn’t hurt for you at a distance?” Bex whispered. “That it wouldn’t be worse not knowing what was happening?” She swiped angrily at her eyes. “And why—why are you talking about this like it’s inevitable? It might not ever happen!”

“But it could,” he said softly. “It could and we shouldn’t pretend otherwise.”

“You let Jay help you last time,” Bex sniffed as she shot that back, grasping at things. “How would this be different?”

“Jay—he would never follow me down to the very bottom,” Mouse said. “That’s what they teach you with all that first responder stuff, you know. Can’t save anybody if you’re gone too.” He sat back and stared out at the trees. “There’s not going to be a magical combination here of things that can be present in our relationship to make sure I don’t relapse—”

“I know that, Mouse,” she snapped, twisting in her seat to face him. “I’m not—I’m not completely naïve here, okay? But I am having trouble processing you making decisions for me, again, and asking me to do something that I find abjectly horrible. How could we go forward like that? How could we build anything with that ‘plan’ hanging over us?”

“I don’t know, Bex.” He stood up, dragging a hand through his hair as he turned to face her. “Maybe—maybe this has been fucked from the start and I really, truly have no business being with anyone.”

“Stop,” Bex demanded. “That’s—you know that’s not true. You deserve everything.”

“Well,” Mouse shrugged, hopelessly lost as to where to go next. “That’s what I was trying to do here and I can’t think of any other way to do it.”

“I can’t walk from you. I won’t,” Bex said. He closed his eyes against the despair in hers. “There’s got to be another way.”

“Let me know when you think of it,” Mouse said.

Then he did what she wouldn’t and left.

***

Bex

She slid off the bench and sat on the ground beside Kol, burying her face in his fur.

“What the hell just happened?”

Click here to read Chapter Thirteen. Click here to read Chapter Fourteen. Click here to read Chapter Fifteen. Click here to read Chapter Sixteen.

[Author's note: LISTEN! I KNOW! I KNOW, OKAY?? BUT PLEASE TRUST ME. I SWEAR ON ALL THINGS HERRMANN THAT THIS STORY HAS THE HAPPIEST OF ENDINGS WITH ALL THE RESOLUTION, OKAY? I'M SO SERIOUS.]

Click here to read 500 Miles on ao3:

Here is the tag list (let me know if you wish to be added or removed):

@sorry-i-spaced, @thegirlwhowishedeveryonelived, @ivyalmighty, @thewannabewriter, @lexhalstead3, @multifandomgrl08, @sensitivemallysix, @thebejeweledwatercat, @emme-looou, @trulylavandedarling, @onechicagochoicesbutterfly

16 notes · View notes

thelemoncoffee · 2 years

Text

What if Au where either Shuichi or Kokichi (or both) is the mastermind- but the Killing game is very different as a results.

by different i don't just mean different kill order either. i always thought it was weird that all Alt MM aus had any character doing the exact same formula and setup that Junko did, despite them probably having very different ideas of what kind of stuff they could do to create despair. So! this Au is one where the Killing Game rules and "how to play" are fitted more to how either MM would handle it.

For Shuichi, i see a less in your face situation, more like a "they don't know there's even a game until the first person has been murdered" type beat. Shuichi would influence the players with note and blackmail style motives that's not actively broadcasted to the others, basically trying to make a more eerie and cold feeling murder mystery for them to trudge through. after the first kill only then would his Monomascot reveal itself and tell them cryptically how to save their own asses in the trial, then rarely appeare unless summoned by calling it's name or if it's there to give someone some info that might get them to do something. The mono of course over sees the trials but is much less dramatic about it and give everyone a very uneasy feeing. it'd be way more mystery oriented and way less spectical.

For Kokichi it's like the canon killing game got cranked up to 11. He's all about the spectical, having his mono refer to him as "the ringleader" and going for a much more compettitive game-show approach. he isn't as keen on the killing part as he's still pasifictic, but he has lackies who can handle that for him, only getting blood on his hands indirectly. He wants to see them all struggle though, he wants to watch them go through any challenge he throws at them be it game or riddle or random countdown to beat, their panic and struggle under presure gives him pure joy. His mono would frequently appear to dramatically give them new bullshit to go through and put strain on the players and their sanity till they eventually snap and kill someone- triggering a trial ofc.

both would absolutly be hidden amongst the players but in two very different ways. Shuichi wants to see things from the ground level and directly influence it, he wants to get the satisfaction of giving these people a beacon of hope in such a scary situation only to turn around and be the source of their despair. Kokichi is there just for kicks, he said it himself- he loves playing life on hardmode- he'd absolutly want to pose as a player just to get to play his own games and risk his own life, he'd act alot less malicious than he does in canon as to divert attention from himself but he'd still be there wedging distrust between eveyone and getting his ass put in the hotseat for fun.

The two of them working together actually might end up with something similar to a canon Killing Game, what with Kokichi handling all the spectical and chaos while Shuichi does the dirty work of creating the mystery and exicuting people. it wouldn't be exactly the same of course, Kokichi wanting a more circus theme and more games/puzzles/challanges to trip them up, and Shuichi trying to make the mysteries more dire and complex than your average Junko would by keeping some motives secrete until it's too late. Hell, in a team up i could see them playing the "innocent couple" having everyone believe there's only one MM and playing a pair would easily put them in the clear, any fake fighting they may do would freak the other players out and add tension, and them being a couple would allow them to be around each other alot to plot together. They'd both love despair but their own ideas of what despair is are very different; Shuichi seeing it as a cold and painful thing that suffocates, and Kokichi seeing it more like a game prize. MM!Shuichi is a sadist, MM!Kokichi is an adrenallen Junkie.

#danganronpa #ndrv3 #danganronpa v3 #kokichi ouma #shuichi saihara #saiouma #au prompt #au idea #au #mastermind au #alternate mastermind #kai prompts

179 notes · View notes

enby-denby · 5 months

Text

Seeing as there are three days left of my little TADC poll, and knowing full well that a majority of the votes have already been cast and the winner has all but been chosen, I'd like to give a deeper summary of each to both hype up those who've voted already for their choices and to give people seeing it for the first time a more informed choice. I meant to do this sooner, but I was doing the Dead Colonizers feast with my family for the past two days. Anyway, here are your fics:

Chess Gang Flashback: This fic would begin in the development crew at C&A noticing that their first playtester wasn't exiting the game on schedule and sending in a (way too) elite team of administrators to rescue said employee. As admins, they default to a form reminiscent of the Admin icons on their work laptops: chess pieces, to be precise. Kinger tries to lead the way, even when he no longer remembers the plan, Queenie will make power moves until she realizes how powerless she really is, and Bishop tries to do good by his Lord only to be corrupted by the divinity of the digital world. And the others? The rook, the knight, and the lost pawn? They may not outlast the others, but their actions will have lasting impacts.

Hotel Staff AU: Exactly what it says on the tin, really, t1he circus is instead a hotel that everyone works at. Pomni is a Valet, Caine is her manager that is friendly and supportive (when he makes himself availible, that is), Ragatha is a Front Desk Auditor that helps her a lot with paperwork, Jax is a porter that never does more than his job description and screws around with his coworkers, Gangle is a bellhop who puts on a happy face for guests only to duck into the bell closet to cry about getting stiffed on tips, Zooble is a bartender at the hotel bar who doesn't talk much and leaves as soon as their shift ends but sometimes brings Pomni water or soft drinks, and Kinger is the property manager for this (and several other) hotels whose gone a little crazy from being run ragged. The main six work the same night shift schedule, dealing with all sorts of weird guests, requests and personal stresses (including some not so digital, not so doomed yuri).

Pomni is a System and Ragatha is queer: I envisioned these as not one fic but two intertwined stories; both would share a single canon and events from one would effect the other, but could be read in either order. One half of this series is Pomni's traumatic first day resulting in her splitting into a system. Below is an illustration of the colorful cast of characters this story would feature, all within the colorful character they all live in, inside-out style:

The other half focuses on Ragatha, her sewing skills, and the wonderful and horrible "personal project" that she keeps grafting to herself to cope with circus life/past traumas around her femininity. I am trying to talk around tumblers censors, so just know this: it's one part spicy fantasies, one part skin-crawling descriptions of the reality of what this sort of fabric-surgery would entail. The inflection point of these two narratives is that Pomni and Ragatha would confide their coping skills with one another and bond in the process.

One Shot where Pomni Meets Bishop: this one will make more sense after the Chess Gang Flashback, but it doesn't neatly fit into that narrative. Instead, this story finds Pomni lost in another distant courner of the circus, a land claimed by an exiled zealot. The former wants answers about the circus, the latter wants another convert to his ideology... or otherwise manipulate her to play the role he thinks is needed to be played. All told it would be a clash of chaos and order, of logic and belief, and is going to be full of emotional (perhaps even literal) bombshells.

Toy Story AU: this I came up with on a complete whim when making the poll, but I have developed the idea some what. I'm honestly torn between making Caine a human (controls the games, comes and goes as he pleases, unaware of the suffering he is inflicting on his toys, etc) and a toy in the position of Woody (lays out the rules of being a toy, his design, bringing Pomni back when she strays) but I know I want Pomni to be confused and resentful of her existence as a plaything. Her idea of an exit is the toys leaving the bedroom and forming a society out in the woods, but the other toys are skeptical of her plans. One cool thing about this story is I can call out the darker aspects of Toy Story's premise, like the fact that freezing up seems to be an involuntary reflex on the toy's part.

New person joins the circus: this would be the introduction of another oc, this one a living stuffed animal named Totes. Initially believing the circus to be a big silly drug trip, they seemingly shrug off the weirdness of the circus and embrace their half weasel, half tote-bag existence with ease... until they sober up, and Pomni finds herself having to navigate a role similar to the one Ragatha had for her when she first arrived. This is definitely one of the narratives that leans into the circus being a grim and endless cycle, and thus this fic represents an inflection point of Pomni reflecting on this shared, miserable experience.

Zooble Theseus' Ships Themself: another "throw it in" idea, but a wonderful thought experiment to explore that I imagine they have done at some point. This fic would explore the nature of a being that can swap out every part of themselves, except for an intangible piece of sapience that is not transferred to any one piece. This is proven when the reformed Zooble tries to make a second self with the swapped-out pieces, and fails.

Descendants Style story: Somebody has to do this, and in a sense many fans on Tumblr have laid the groundwork with their fan kid designs. This would take place after a sort of "balance patch" to the game that would allow the humans in the circus enough autonomy to have children in some capacity or another, and rather than going on many small adventures Caine sends a group of said descendants on a grander adventure as a sort of coming of age ritual. There will be goofy enemies, fun dynamics between the circus kids, deep existential questions on the humanity of said children, and what their future might hold being trapped in the same world as their parents.

Pomni becomes the "New Old Guard": this is the natural conclusion of the "Circus as an inescapable cycle" line of stories, with no concessions made with whimsical twists or pretense of escape. And we rip that bandaid off harshly with the first chapter detailing the abstraction of Ragatha coinciding with yet another new arrival, the combination of which triggers some horrendous PTSD and survivor's guilt. If she can make it even a quarter of the time Kinger had made it-- or even through the next week-- it will be a miracle.

Good/Steak Dinner ending: if the above was a True Bad ending, then this is the opposite. A few years after escaping the circus, the main six have gotten physical and mental therapy, as well as justice. But not much money, just enough to cover their bills and a single very nice meal for their troubles. The story of their escape and the aftermath of their stay is told as playful reminiscing over drinks and appetizers, their lasting anguishes carved out of porterhouse and ribeye entrees; as the night winds down and the humans start to return to their old lives, the second oldest member of the circus and the last victim of that digital hell get their just desserts.

So, there's the loglines for each. And as necessary I will make more art as I develop each idea/feel like I need to. But as you can see, there's a reason I am so indecisive about these ideas that I am putting these fics to committee. I think up/mentally expland upon these fics faster than I can write them, and the data I am getting from Tumblr is giving those brainstorms a direction to consistantly burrow in. Get out the vote, my fellow TADC Tumblerites!

#tadc #tadc oc #tadc ragatha #tadc jax #tadc pomni #tadc kinger #tadc zooble #tadc gangle #tadc caine #I'm trying not to spoil the current results #but the current data tells an interesting story #about the order I might tell these stories in #will probabl post about this again when the poll ends #note to self: next time #we only need one day for a poll like this

7 notes · View notes

teecupangel · 1 year

Note

What if Desmond has a womb tattoos (succubus tattoo and he didn't regret it because he's laidback like that) as result of his newfound freedom at 16. What would Shaun, Rebecca and Lucy and his father's reactions? Also u bet it would suck if Desmond went back in time and had hide to keep it hidden especially when you are in Jerusalem or in the Renaissance. Is the American Revolutionary War good for him not hide or not?

For those unfamiliar with the womb tattoo, I’m unfamiliar if it has a different connotation in other countries but, in Japan, it’s a tattoo that’s meant to show a person who really loves dick (and maybe creampies and impregnation kink). I mostly see it in adult-only doujins and it’s very common in ones that involve mind break.

It’s like the kinky version of tramp stamp, I guess?

Anyway, it’s canon that Desmond met some girls from Illinois according to AC Revelations. So Desmond, new to the world and only having learned about it from what he heard from the adults on the Farm, was probably a bit gullible. If we consider the Farm to have a more militaristic feel to it (like a more secluded screwed-up version of Masyaf without a normal village below) then Desmond probably finds the bubbly girls nice and sweet. These girls, who let a young teenager hitchhike with them, were probably on their spring break or maybe they were on a road trip before college.

And they’ll probably be into doing something dumb and fun which includes getting a tattoo from a shady ‘we-don’t-ask-as-long-as-you-have-cash’ tattoo parlor along the way.

Not the best idea, of course.

But teenagers high on freedom would probably do dumb shit.

Including Desmond.

And, because Desmond is gullible, he agrees to a womb tattoo after one of the girls talks to him about it.

He figured it would be okay. He always wear a shirt anyway so it wasn’t like people would see it.

Nine years later and the team sees it for the first time when Desmond takes off his shirt to finally changed to clean clothes because he’d been wearing the same clothes since Abstergo captured him.

Lucy would have been too busy with her job for the Assassins and Templars to know what the womb tattoo signifies. Not to mention, she was raised in a similar compound as the Farm and had been trained personally by William Miles so, unless it’s a mainstream pop culture reference, she isn’t going to get it. (In other words, Lucy is basic.)

Rebecca, on the other hand, would definitely recognize it and she’s be waggling her eyebrows at Desmond, making subtle comments about his kink preference. Desmond, by now, understands what the tattoo means and just joins in the fun because he is laidback like that and it became a symbol of freedom for Desmond (and a reminder of how there are nice people out there… who may or may not have been tipsy the entire road trip, now that Desmond thought about it, dear lord, it was a miracle they didn’t crash)

Shaun, on the other hand, absolutely knows what the tattoo means because he’s seen weird shit thanks to his inquiring mind. But because he knows that it isn’t exactly something he could spin as related to conspiracy theories or historical events (that he knows of at the moment anyway), he is left pretending not to understand Rebecca and Desmond’s jokes about his tattoo. And because none of them know the real story behind the tattoo, they all assume that it is a kink thing so when Rebecca jokes about it while they’re eating and Desmond just retorts with a playful “Well, what can I say? I like feeling full.” and Shaun just breaks the plastic fork he’s been using because come on, Desmond!

William Miles… oh boy. So Bill has this whole ‘distant father’ bullshit going on. Not only that but he is also going to be focused on the mission and the impending world-ending sun event that will be happening on the 21st so he won’t talk about it. The day he did receive Desmond’s medical report after he was put into a coma because of Juno, he sees it on the notes (just Chewy saying: two tattoos noted, one in the arm, one by the naval area, both clean, no signs of infection) and Chewy provided pictures of the tattoos out of professional courtesy. Now, when Bill sees that tattoo, his first thought would be…

“Oh god, he’s just like his mother.”

(this is what happens when you don’t give us any breadcrumbs about Desmond’s mom, Ubisoft. We can make shit up for the angst or for the funnies.)

Now for time-travel shenanigans he has to suffer through.

I think Desmond would be fine as long as he doesn’t take off his clothes. It’s when he takes off his clothes that things would get more complicated.

Considering the religious background of the Third Crusades, tattoos would be a big no-no in that time period. The Levantine Brotherhood would definitely have something to say about it since, considering Abbas’ words in AC Revelations how the burning of bodies are not their way, the Levantine Brotherhood is, at most, heavily leaning towards Islam, and, at least, practices many Islamic traditions to show their support to the people of Levant.

Now, in Renaissance Italy, Desmond would have some leeway. All he has to do is say that it’s a thing that happens in a faraway place and he’d probably get more curious looks than derision. Of course, keep away from the Church because… yeaaahhh…

American Revolution War would be a similar thing. The Native Americans would probably ask what the tattoo means out of curiosity (and that’s an awkward conversation Desmond wouldn’t want to have. He better make up a nice lie fast) while the Colonizers would probably see the tattoo and think Desmond is a criminal or a pirate as those are the main people to have tattoos during that time period (exhibit A: Captain Edward Kenway).

Honestly, considering the clothes normally worn during those three time period, it would be stranger for Desmond to wear clothes that actually shows it off (his arm tattoo, on the other hand, would be easier to see). The only times I can think of that the tattoo would make an appearance, on the top of my head, would be if he was naked in the first place (like a bath or if he’s wounded and they needed to take off his clothes) or if he’s actually about to have sex. If it’s the latter, well… guess Desmond would find out if he does have a kink or not.

#desmond as a womb tattoo #tags i did not think i would write when i joined tumblr #i love it thanks nonny #assassin's creed #desmond miles #btw i did make a fic where desmond gets a womb tattoo #it's the tentacle demon au fic #ehe

27 notes · View notes

myfaveisfuckable · 11 months

Text

Rants under the read more

mihashi/hamada: listen literally any ship that isnt abemiha or tajihana is a rarepair for this manga which deeply sucks if u arent a fan of either of those ships but i dont think this pairing even has a tag like these two are childhood friends hamada starts a cheer sqaud for the baseball team mihashi plays on theyre generally pretty close (its been a while since ive read the start of the manga but im pretty sure hamada also got mihashi into baseball in the first place? like hello??) n then theres like one fic in their platonic relationship tag so 👍👍

Nokiami : (spoilers for the game) all the fan stuff ive seen for the game is painfully straight unless its focusing on the two ships where one character is canonically gay n in love with the other (protag of the sequel game with his gay bestie i forgot the name of n yuuko/fei) n ami is usually just drawn on her own BUT theres a lot of canon subtext between nokia n ami mostly as a result of not much actually changing based on if u play as a boy or a girl regardless nokia to some extent likes ami she flirts with her talks about their relationship as if theyre already dating theres a scene that parallels a m/f couple in the game that plays exactly the same between ami n nokia with two other characters saying something along the lines of ah young love during a mandatory side quest ami gets offered an implied sex doll that looks exactly like nokia (weird story there the quest ends with it being heavily implied that the people that take the dolls end up having their organs harvested while their minds are stuck in a digital space called eden unaware that theyre not in the real world) n she has to think about it before declining the offer nokia's character arc is working to become a strong leader n reliable friend cause she wants to stand next to ami instead of relying on her theyre childhood friends but forgot about it ok i need to explain a bit more of the story so like as kids ami n nokia along with three other characters met beta testing for eden n one of them ended up getting eden syndrome to make sure theyre all able to leave safely (theres a thing called eaters that if u get eaten by put u in a coma cause theyre storing the contents of ur brain in them) n a guy who wants to use the eaters to get to the next stage of evolution removes their memories of the incident so years later as teenagers ami nokia n arata (one of the childhood friends important to the story but not to the ship) become friends again n reunite on eden where ami ends up getting eden syndrome but in a funky way cause she was logging out as she got eaten so she has a cyber body that over the course of the game deteriorates n at the end of the game ami basically dies right as everything is being fixed all the victims of eden syndrome are no longer comatose but ami is cause yknow kind of deteriorated too much n it happened right in front of nokia's eyes as she reached out for her hand so they could go home together n nokia cries for the only time in the game cause of that but ive genuinely never seen any fan stuff of them interacting so despite them being teased romantically n built up as being really important to eachother theres nothing not even like nokia with takumi (boy protagonist) im submitting it specifically as nokia/ami just cause i like wlw ships more if u want to do it neutrally protag's surname regardless of gender is aiba sorry if this is incoherent its been like 6 months since ive played the game

#poll #tournament #oofuri #digimon cyber sleuth

3 notes · View notes

glassautomaton · 1 year

Note

Hi Glassy, seems like I've been half of your inbox lately, haha! I've got a lot of questions that fester in my brain though, so I suppose that's half of an excuse.

Anyway, last night, I was wondering about Omega-7, I was wondering if you had a specific timeline for that? Wodering how the Foundation was able to retrieve Iris from the clutches of an angry Summerian Warrior as well haha, did she escape? Or did they sweep through after thinking everyone was dead and found her half alive?

Also, would you ever make a tale set in Omega-7 or where Omega-7 is the main subject? I think that you would do wonderful with making that!

Anyway, Iris, Beatrice, and Adrian swirl around in my brain like some horrible broken found family smoothey, so any information that you want to share about them is welcome! :]

Not quite sure what you mean in terms of a specific timeline for Omega-7. I'll be honest in saying that I've had a bit of trouble in really getting into the nitty-gritty of how all that would fit in with DA, more specifically Able's character. I have a couple ideas with how I want to take him, but he's just... a little hard to fit in? I dunno. I could get into it (I've spent a while thinking about him) but that isn't what this ask is about, though I could type it out of someone wants. These asks have been a good way of getting things in order in my head.

In terms of a general timeline, Iris was taken in when she was 13. Adrian joined the team shortly before and stayed relatively close with Iris, and acted a bit like a liaison between Able's team and Iris' team, which Beatrice was on. Adrian spent a lot of time with Able and took the brunt of that - he changed over the course of the task force. Iris did as well, though not quite in the same way, as Adrian went from someone who was ultimately well-intentioned but trying his best to someone who was extremely cynical and divisive, while Iris started off idyllic and naive and became more and more worn down and jaded.

Eventually, Iris is pushed to kill someone but refuses, which is where the flashback with Adrian in Voices Carry Part 4 takes place. Iris was taken off the team while things were sorted out, and Adrian was injured (leading to all the stuff with 784-ARC) and Able went on his rampage during this time. Iris was at a different location, but given her photos to see if she could stop Able. This was a last-ditch effort to contain him, and hey, if Iris got more comfortable with killing as a result, then that was two birds with one stone.

Iris is unable to do this, and is injured as seen in Voices Carry Part 2, a memory that formed essentially a deep scar, something I wanted to use a bit of imagery to convey there. That leads right into the start of Kill the Feeling, which starts when Iris is 15.

As for writing Omega-7 tales, that's a definite maybe. I think I'll have more flashbacks to that time moving forward, as Iris' relationship to Adrian will have to be expanded upon a bit more in the future if I stick with my current plans. I could write entire articles that take place mostly in that time period if need be, but time will tell. But I do want to spend more time in the future looking back at that stuff.

As a bit of a side note, I'm trying to figure out how much of the 784 incident I want to keep as canon in my series. 784-ARC is canon, as it was mentioned in Redwood Labs, but as for the actual events I might end up retooling them a little bit if the need arises. I think that's another thing I'll have to go back and reread with a more critical eye, but the last time I did that for Olympia Project it didn't exactly impress me.

#scp #asks

6 notes · View notes

rmorde · 2 months

Text

Oh shit. I'm invested.

SORCERER HUNTER AU: THE SUNGS (with a sprinkling of Yuki & Jinchul)

The Awakened are divided into three categories - Hunter, Sorcerer, Hybrid. Hunters are just like in canon. Hybrids were explained in this previous post. So, who can be awakened as Sorcerers? The people who would have suffered Eternal Sleep.

The bodies of individuals who are intolerant of Mana would undergo some sort of defense mechanism. Their latent skill to observe and/or use Cursed Energy will "awaken". How exactly this happened is still subject to research. Yuki stayed in South Korea to study it further since a lot of people Awakened as Sorcerers there.*

This means that Park Kyung-He became a Sorcerer in this AU. Still undecided about her abilities but she would be part of Yuki's Research Team.* Her husband still went missing but with her job, she and her children could manage living comfortably.

When Jinwoo Awakened as a Hunter, she was terrified. Kyung-He does not want her son to end up like her husband. This terror increased when the test results show that he was E Rank.

Highly aware of his mother's fear, Jinwoo reassured her that he will not pursue a Hunter career. However, he still wants to help people with his abilities. So, he decides to join the KHSA* and eventually Yuki's Research Team after he graduates.

Jinwoo also volunteers to participate in E-D Rank Dungeon Raids from time to time. Kyung-He disapproves but he insists that he must go so he won't leave them for the military*. Besides, he is just an observer most of the time. He will not get in trouble and would run away as soon as it becomes too dangerous. ---> Not that it made any difference since the Double Dungeon Incident still happened anyway.

As for Jinah, she is a regular human. No Awakenings at all. She has complicated feelings about it because in her family, she would be the safest yet most vulnerable at the same time.*

For the most part, she is perfectly fine. However, deep inside sometimes, she feels a tiny bit left out. Why did her entire family Awaken but not her? Was there something wrong with her?

*South Korea has the highest concentration of Eternal Sleep Patients. Idk why but I headcanoned that and recycled it in this AU.

*Yuki's Research Team focuses on the study of Souls and Gates. The Soul Research is to figure out how exactly can ordinary people turn into a Sorcerer/Hunter and can they induce the process? The Gates Research became an extension of this.

*Korean Hunter and Sorcerer Association (KHSA). After Yuki returned to South Korea for good, she worked closely with the government and Go Gunhee in creating an organization that could help Hunters and Sorcerers alike. KHSA was founded as a ruling body and support system for the Awakened. It also works as a center for any research studies involving Awakenings and Gates.

*The SK Government set up a law in which all Hunters and Sorcerers are obligated to serve for at least 2 years. "Serve" meaning to participate in Dungeon Raids (Hunters) and Exorcisms (Sorcerers). Grades and Ranks do not matter. If someone is an Awakened, they are obligated to serve their country. After their service, they can retire.

-> Non-Awakened obviously are exempt and are only subjected to the regular conscription.

-> Jinah is the "safest" because she is not obligated by any laws to put herself in harm's way. However, she is the most vulnerable if harm finds a way towards her because she has no powers.

-> Funny Idea: Jinchul is a poor victim of this "obligated service" law. -------> At 18, he enlisted for military service. His attitude was "Better get it done earlier than later." -------> At age 20, he finished his service and enrolled at KNPU (Korean National Police University) to fulfil his goal of becoming a police officer. The Gates appeared during this time but it is not something Jinchul truly cares about yet. -------> At age 22, he saw Jinwoo's traumatized face being broadcasted on live TV after his father went missing on a Dungeon Raid. Jinchul's conscience was attacked with feels of "Who would help the Hunters and their families? :( " He quit KNPU a few months after and went to business school - aiming to get into KHA. ------> At age 23, the obligation service law for Hunters and Sorcerers was passed. Jinchul shrugs it off as not really his problem. He would regret that. -----> At age 24: Awakened as a Hunter, on his birthday no less! Jinchul was exasperated. After testing to know his Rank, he was annoyed. He was an A Rank. A RANK. He'd be of more use in the field at this rate. Maybe he should quit business school. -----> Still Age 24: Was forced to quit business school because Jinchul's military service at 18-20 didn't count. He is still subject to the obligation service law of Hunters and Sorcerers. Jinchul was infuriated. -----> Age 24-26: Jinchul had a long grueling battle against red tape and bureaucracy for his military service to be acknowledged as equivalent to the Hunters/Sorcerers obligation service. His battle was legendary (it actually caught the attention of Gunhee). He was successful... for the future generation. Throughout his years of legal one-man battle, he participated in Dungeon Raids because Jinchul cannot help it. He has to help. He ended up fulfilling his obligation service anyway. ----------> Notable People who reaped the benefit of Jinchul's "Paper War": Minsung (who wants to skip military service by becoming a Hunter), Jinwoo (participating in Dungeon Raids so he won't go to military and leave his family anymore), Byung-gyu (retired as a Hunter and won't have to attend military anymore) ----> Age 30: Awakened as a Sorcerer (possible Grade 1 or SPECIAL). Jinchul is not happy.

#hunter sorcerer au #i'll add more later #i have too many aus #nooooo

0 notes

spacetimewithstuartgary · 1 year

Photo

Astronomers discover helium-burning white dwarf A white dwarf star can explode as a supernova when its mass exceeds the limit of about 1.4 solar masses. A team led by the Max Planck Institute for Extraterrestrial Physics (MPE) in Garching and involving the University of Bonn has now found a binary star system in which matter flows onto the white dwarf from its companion. The system was found due to bright, so-called super-soft X-rays, which originate in the nuclear fusion of the overflowed gas near the surface of the white dwarf. The unusual thing about this source is that it is helium and not hydrogen that overflows and burns. The measured luminosity suggests that the mass of the white dwarf is growing more slowly than previously thought possible, which may help to understand the number of supernovae caused by exploding white dwarfs. The results have been published in the journal Nature. Exploding white dwarfs are not only considered the main source of iron in the universe, they are also an important tool for cosmology. As so-called Type Ia supernovae (SN Ia), they all become roughly equally bright, allowing astrophysics a precise determination of the distance of their host galaxies. However, even after many years of intensive research, it remains unclear under what circumstances the mass of a white dwarf can grow to the so-called Chandrasekhar limit. This is the theoretical upper limit for the mass of a white dwarf, derived in 1930 by Indian-American astrophysicist and Nobel laureate Subrahmanyan Chandrasekhar. In the early 1990s, super-soft X-ray sources with stable hydrogen burning on their surfaces were established as a new class of objects with ROSAT, and for a time those were considered potential candidates for SN Ia progenitors. The problem with these sources, however, is their hydrogen abundance: type Ia supernovae show no trace of hydrogen. For more than 30 years, double star systems have been predicted, in which a white dwarf accretes and burns helium stably at its surface, but such sources have never been observed. An international team led by the Max Planck Institute for Extraterrestrial Physics (MPE) has now found an X-ray source whose optical spectrum is completely dominated by helium. "The super-soft X-ray source [HP99] 159 has been known since the 1990s, when it was first observed with ROSAT, more recently with XMM-Newton and now with eROSITA," explains Jochen Greiner, who leads the analysis of this source at MPE. "Now, we were able to identify it as an optical source in the Large Magellanic Cloud. In its spectrum we found mainly emission lines of helium originating from the accretion disk." However, this does not solve the problem of SN Ia progenitors: theoretical models predict that about 2-5% of the matter of the helium companion star will be carried away by the SN Ia explosion and ejected into the environment. However, this amount of helium has not been found in most supernovae Ia observed to date. There is, however, a subclass with smaller luminosity, the SN Iax, in which the explosion is weaker, and therefore less helium is blown away. The now discovered system [HP99] 159 could end up in such a SN Iax according to current knowledge, since the measurements here indicate that continuous helium burning in white dwarfs is possible even at lower accretion rates than theoretically predicted. The measured luminosity of [HP99] 159 is about ten times smaller than expected at the canonical rate, while at the same time the measured X-ray temperature is exactly in the expected range for stable helium burning. "The observed X-ray brightness suggests that the burning of the inflowing helium in the white dwarf is stabilized by its rapid rotation, making a final supernova explosion of the system likely," says Prof. Dr. Norbert Langer of the Argelander Institute for Astronomy, who is also a member of the Matter Transdisciplinary Research Area at the University of Bonn. Since previous measurements indicate that the luminosity has remained the same for about 50 years, a wide range of accretion rates leading to explosions should be possible. "Stars without hydrogen envelopes, such as the companion star found in [HP99] 159, are an important intermediate step in the life cycle of binary stars that should occur in about 30% of such systems," says Julia Bodensteiner of ESO, who has been studying massive stars since her master's thesis at MPE. "There should be many such stars; but only a few have been observed so far." The team now hopes to find dozens of similar sources in the two Magellanic Clouds with eROSITA. This should allow them to further constrain the conditions for SN Ia progenitors.

#space #science #Astronomy #physics #news #white dwarf

1 note · View note

comfortbucky · 3 years

Note

hey hey! can u do some fluffy bucky about having to share a hotel room w u and there’s only one bed!!!! and he’s trying to be respectful n stuff but man does he have the fattest crush on u! thank u <333

HEY HEY YES OMFGGG THE ONE BED TROPE (ur mind😌🤝)

i’VE BEEN WAITING FOR THIS ONE I DIDN’T EXPECT IT TO COME SO SOON

𝗼𝗻𝗲 𝗯𝗲𝗱, 𝘁𝘄𝗼 𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗼𝘁𝘀 ⋆｡˚ ☁︎ ˚｡⋆｡˚☽˚｡⋆ ｡˚

pairing: bucky x fem!avenger!reader

tags: enemies(?) to lovers BABYYYY, angst, fluff

A/N: i almost always write about tfatws!bucky in mind but let me try and branch out by writing about avenger!bucky hehe

i hope u enjoy🥺💗i absolutely loved this prompt and loved writing this!!!! (it is almost 4am for me as i am posting this :) i’m insane :))

this oneshot will not be following the canon timeline!

word count: 2k

my masterlist!

completed requests!

“Stick to the plan, Y/N.” Steve’s voice came through over the intercom. She rolled her eyes at his warning. He always seemed to be extra cautious with her, making her feel like an unimportant member of the team, and this mission was no different.

“I got this,” she said, completely ignoring his request and charging headfirst at the enemy. Her brash decision resulted in her receiving a heavy beat down, ending up with a split lip and fractured ribs.

Needless to say, Steve was pissed. He and Y/N developed a close friendship over the years, during his search for Bucky. She was oftentimes the one who would stay up all night with him, looking for any trace of Bucky’s existence online. She’d become one of the closest people in his life, which is exactly why he was upset with her, endangering her own life.

After the mission, he confronted her at the base camp.

“You could’ve gotten killed!”

“But I didn’t,” she snapped back. “And the mission was a success anyways, so I don’t get why you’re so mad right now.”

Steve closed his eyes and pinched the bridge of his nose, sighing.

“It’s reckless behavior like this that’s eventually going to get you killed, Y/N.”

Bucky walked into the room and immediately regretted his decision as soon as he laid his eyes on Y/N. He’d come to foster an animosity towards her, after seeing her close friendship with Steve. After Bucky joined the Avengers, he noticed how much time they spent together, and jealousy started to fester within him. Steve was the only person he felt comfortable being around in the tower and she constantly took him away from Bucky. Everyone else seemed to have an aversion to him, or so he assumed. He never gave anyone the chance to get to know him, locking himself up in his room most hours of the day. Bucky didn’t think anyone would want to get to know an ex-assassin, especially one that killed the Tony Stark’s parents. She was the one thing that kept Steve away from him and he despised it. So Bucky did what he did best and avoided any sort of interaction with her.

Steve looked at Bucky and suddenly, an idea popped in his head. He had noticed how closed-off Bucky had been since joining the Avengers and refused to let Y/N be alone, worried that she might make another brazen decision. He hatched a plan to kill 2 birds with 1 stone.

“Bucky,” Steve said, making his way over to him. “You and Y/N will be assigned to the same room tonight.”

Bucky choked on his own spit in response and Y/N began to protest.

“You’re not serious, right?” Steve turned to face her with a stern expression.

“You’re not giving me any reason to trust you to be alone.” She let out a defeated sigh and crossed her arms across her chest.

“Why me?” Bucky asked, trying to figure out how he ended up in this situation.

Steve placed a hand on Bucky’s shoulder and looked into his eyes. “Because I trust you, Buck. I need you to do this for me.”

Bucky could see the desperation in Steve’s eyes and reluctantly nodded.

Steve was able to obtain another key card to the hotel room that Y/N was assigned to for the mission. He forgot to take into account the logistics of the sleeping arrangements, leaving Bucky to find a single bed as he entered Y/N’s room.

Bucky froze, his right hand on the door handle, keeping it open, his left hand by his side, holding his duffel bag. He racked his brain, trying to figure out what to do, when Y/N’s voice pulled him from his thoughts.

“Relax,” she started, motioning for him to come inside. “I’ll sleep on the floor, alright?”

Y/N knew that Bucky didn’t like her, despite Steve trying to convince her otherwise. It hurt her feelings a bit, especially after she’d learned so much about him through both Steve’s stories and the time she spent tracking him down. He was such an important person to Steve, her close friend, and Bucky hated her. At first, she figured he was shy and wasn’t ready to open up to anyone else, especially after all the trauma he endured. But she realized he actively disliked her over time, with Bucky always leaving the room when she entered or ignoring her offers to hang out with her and Steve. Eventually, she gave up on reaching out to Bucky, as she only seemed to upset him further, no matter what she did. She figured it was for the best.

Bucky stepped into the room and shook his head.

“Bed’s too soft for me anyways, I’ll take the floor,” he grumbled.

Y/N shrugged in response, knowing that Bucky would be too stubborn to try and argue against. She turned around and picked up the phone, calling the front desk to ask for extra blankets and pillows. When she hung up the phone, she turned back to Bucky to see him nod in thanks.

The rest of the night was silent, as they both prepared for bed, taking turns going into the bathroom to wash up and change. While Y/N was in the bathroom, Bucky arranged the extra blankets and pillows into a makeshift bed on the ground, something that he’d done countless times before. Y/N exited the bathroom in an oversized t-shirt that covered her shorts, and placed her toiletries bag in one of the hotel dresser drawers.

“Bathroom’s all yours.” Bucky grunted in response, grabbing some clothes and a bag headed for the bathroom.

“Don’t do anything stupid,” he stated, just before shutting the door behind him. Y/N scoffed at his comment, gently climbing into bed, in an attempt to not further injure her ribs. She winced as she tried to get into a comfortable position before settling to sleep on the side of her unaffected ribs.

Bucky emerged from the bathroom to see Y/N lying on her left side, her back towards him. He assumed that she had already fallen asleep and quietly crawled into his makeshift bed.

Approximately 10 minutes had passed, when he heard her sniffling. At first, he thought the noise was coming from outside the window, but he traced it back to her. He remained lying on his back for a moment, deciding whether or not to say something. Bucky sighed before speaking.

“You okay?” Y/N immediately stiffened upon hearing Bucky’s voice. She was hoping that he wouldn’t hear her crying, despite his super soldier hearing abilities.

“Yeah, ‘m fine,” she replied back, her voice wavering as she spoke. Y/N hated how weak and pathetic she sounded in that moment. Her fractured ribs made it hard for her to breathe and the adrenaline, that was previously shielding her from the pain, had faded, leaving her to lie there in agony. On top of that, she also felt that this mission solidified her belief that Steve had little faith in her ability to be an Avenger. The last thing she wanted to do right now, was to confess her insecurities to Bucky.

Bucky’s attitude softened, hearing Y/N’s voice crack when she spoke. He knew she’d gotten hurt due to her own, dumb, decision during the mission. Bucky quietly pulled his blankets off and stood up, leaving the room without saying another word. As soon as the door shut, Y/N burst into tears. Bucky did exactly as he’d done in the past many times before, leave. She wasn’t sure why this time upset her more than the rest. Probably because she knew that he was aware of her crying and he’d still chosen to abandon her completely.

Her thoughts were interrupted by the sound of the door opening, causing her to stop crying. Y/N listened to Bucky’s footsteps growing closer, and felt the bed dip under his weight as he sat on the edge she was facing towards. She peered over the blanket she was covering her face with, to see Bucky facing her, holding a bag of ice, wrapped in a towel. Bucky’s heart sank at the sight of her glossy eyes and tear stained cheeks in the moonlight.

“For your ribs,” he spoke softly, gesturing to the ice bag in his hands.

“Oh. Thank you.”

Y/N took the bag from him, attempting to slowly sit up. She closed her eyes as she grimaced, and suddenly felt a hand on her back, helping her up. Her eyes opened to reveal Bucky, with a soft smile on his lips. She silently thanked him again, placing the ice bag on the right side of her ribcage.

“Thought you hated me,” she mumbled, keeping her gaze down on her lap. He furrowed his brows, keeping his eyes on her.

“I don’t hate you.”

“Well, you definitely don’t like me.”

Bucky paused at her comment, thinking about his next words, before responding.

“I don’t like that you take up all of Steve’s free time,” he grumbled, causing Y/N to quickly look up at Bucky, his eyes averting her gaze. Her face fell, immediately realizing why Bucky had treated her so coldly all this time. He just missed his friend.

“I’m so sorry, Bucky.” She placed a hand on his shoulder and he looked up at her in response. “I didn’t realize, I’m sorry.”

Bucky didn’t know what to say. He wasn’t expecting her to be so kind and understanding, even coming up with multiple points to argue back at her. He realized then that he didn’t know her at all, but that he wanted to now. In an instant, she became an entirely different person. He studied her eyes and wondered if they had always sparkled like that, if her cheeks were naturally rosy, or if her lips had always been so pink and plump.

His expression softened and he cleared his throat. “It’s fine,” he muttered, tearing himself away from her gaze to look down at his lap. After a moment of silence, Bucky stood up to return back to the floor.

“Stay.” The words left Y/N’s mouth before she had time to process them. Bucky froze and turned to face her. “I mean, if you want to, of course. Just figured the floor must be super uncomfortable for you.” Y/N felt a blush creep up onto her cheeks and kicked herself mentally. She looked down at her hands, regretting the words she spoke, before feeling the bed dip again. She looked up to see Bucky. He smiled and she almost melted at the sight.

She shifted over, putting the ice bag on the nightstand, as Bucky crawled into bed next to her. The two rested on their backs, both staring at the ceiling in silence. Bucky remained at a respectful distance away, not wanting to overstep any boundaries. Y/N turned on her left side, her good side, to face him.

“I’m glad you don’t hate me.”

Bucky turned on his side to face her before responding.

“I don’t think I could ever hate you.”

A strand of her hair had fallen in front of her face and Bucky, instinctively, reached out a hand to tuck it behind her ear. Immediately, he regretted it, about to pull his hand back when Y/N took her hand and placed it on top of his, guiding it to rest on her cheek. He cupped her face in his hand and she leaned into his embrace. Bucky felt his heart rate increase as she moved her body closer to his, wrapping the arm she used to hold his hand on her face, across his side. He shifted towards her as well, wrapping his arm around her body, bringing her closer to him.

“Is this okay?” He whispered, nervous that he might have somehow misinterpreted the situation. He hadn’t been with a woman in such an intimate way in years and had no idea what he was doing. Y/N looked up at him and nodded, before snuggling her face into his chest and Bucky felt a wave of calm wash over him.

“Can you stay here tonight?” Y/N mumbled, her face pressed into his chest. He chuckled at the vibrations from her voice and kissed her temple, smoothing her hair back.

“I’ll stay as long as you want me to, honey.”

1K notes · View notes

actualbird · 3 years

Note

Oh god!

I really love the poly headcanons they are so sweet.... (or don't but that's part of it and i think the tot boys+MC deserve all the love the world has to give).

But, liking it or not, our 4 beloved boys are kinda complicated (that's what makes them perfect). Plus I never thought about how people get in poly relationships. So i was thinking, how do you think they all get into a polyrelationship together?

(I really have no idea of how that would happen)

hi, two anons!! im glad you guys liked my nxx team polycule stuff!! i'll answer these in one go, my "headcanon" (in quotes because i think this kinda turned into a character analysis/minific of sorts HAHA) being what first anon asked, How They Get Together.

heads up, wc of this is 1.9k words long so buckle up for a bit of a read jfsjdfkjbf

because first anon, youre right!!! the boys are stupendously complicated which i love so so much but canon has also shown us clearly that each of the boys' quirks and habits and tendencies causes a lot of (mostly played for laughs) friction. the bickering, the backhanded insults, the "im the best one here" preening contests. theyre all SOOOO RIDICULOUS and it is hilarious but yep! the boys r complex!! and that means this beautiful ship, imo, has a lot of phases to get to the actual romantic relationship bit.

how they get together, in my opinion, starts because of mc.

not in the sense that she matchmakes them all, but like.

phase 1 of the nxx team polycule is this:

through being in love with her (which we all know the boys 100% are), each of the boys come to terms with their own flaws and weaknesses. it's very apparent to me in all the story thus far that these boys are flawed as hell, it's very compelling but even more compelling to me is how all of them also do intense mental gymnastics to Not Confront Those Flaws. like, marius is a dickbag always teasing and toeing the line of insincerity, vyn is a controlling mf who always tries to sway situations to his benefit, artem is so repressed to the point that he has genuine trouble with emotions, luke is a self sacrificial bastard and also a huge hypocrite about how no, actually, hes the only one that should be hiding his pain and being dishonest, no dishonesty from other people!! in the beginning of the story, all the boys have their flaws and seem to have just kinda...not addressed how those flaws are harming them and the people around them.

and then mc rolls around and they all fall in love with her. and she sees those flaws and she doesnt let them slide. she challenges the boys in her own ways to see another side of the situation, to acknowledge what theyre doing. she doesnt want to get rid of flaws, thats impossible and also not cool. she just has this beautiful hope for like, all of humanity, that goodness can prevail with the right work. so when she sees her beloved nxx boys, she believes that for them as well.

which leads to phase 2 of the nxx team polycule:

the boys, more aware of themselves, become more aware of each other.

they werent Unaware of the others of course. it's just that they didnt like...truly connect on a personal level just yet. they saw the other teammembers with their emotional armor and flaws and saw a wall that wasnt worth looking past.

but after mc makes them realize that hey, flaws arent the end of the world actually, it's alright and the person behind them may just be worth it, the boys like. end up understanding the others. A LOT OF THIS BIT IS UNINTENTIONAL, ON THEIR PARTS KJDSBFS. like they stumble into understanding each other by accident, they didnt plan it, but over the course of nxx investigations, it's inevitable that they end up seeing the depths of the others. i delve into this a little bit in my fanfic "filler eps of the lost gold" where the boys are just going thru their actions and then trip over another boy's fears or desires and through that, gain a deeper understanding mutually.

and with understanding, sometimes, comes trust.

phase 3 of the nxx team polycule goes like this:

everybody in this team, whether they like it or not, whether they know it or not, has a heart that wants to give love so desperately.

marius lives in a world full of snakes so he cant have his heart on his sleeve for his own protection. vyn wants to be seen as perfect and the heart is inherently messy so he holds it back. artem for a very very long time was focused on work and success and achievement that he neglected his heart. and luke has been giving love all his life in a sense but in a way thats hidden.

all these tendencies that are brought upon their life circumstances results in this: they want to love honestly but they havent been able to do this

until mc. and all of them want to push back whatever fears or patterns their life has instilled in them because they see her and see somebody so unwaveringly good that all their hearts begin giving love to her to make her happy and to make themselves happy as well.

but heres the thing. the boys dont just see mc. by this point, they have connected and understood and come to trust each other as well, and the consequence of that is that They Can See Each Other Now Too, Truly.

and heres the thing. all of the boys are unwaveringly good as well.

one by one, each of the boys realize that what they feel for the other boys in the team starts to...change. yeah theyre all friends, they pick on each other a lot of the time, but the bedrock of the relationship is solid and strong now. but when marius is with luke, marius sees a light inside of luke so bright that he seems unaware that he gives off. when artem is with vyn, artem sees a goodness inside of vyn that hesitates to make itself obvious and known because vyn is scared of getting hurt thanks to it. all of them see the other and their goodness and, unbidden, their hearts want to give love to each other as well.

and because theyre all a bit stupid in their own way theyre like, huh, weird! wonder why this feeling is so familiar! and yet i cant seem to name it...and then they all independently compare these feeling with the feelings they have for mc, a feeling they do know the name of, and theyre like.

WAIT.

THESE FEELINGS ARE...VERY BASICALLY EXACTLY WHAT I FEEL FOR MC.

which only means one thing: theyve fallen in love with everybody else

marius: //goes to his studio to Think and sees that a bunch of his recent art actually had little crumbs of these feelings already, etched into the brushstrokes and scenes. has an emotional crisis about it

vyn: //records a 1 hour long entry in his audio diary to examine and gain control of his feelings but by the end of the hour all he knows is that he wants to hold these people and be held by them

artem: //quite literally just bluescreens, artem.exe has stopped working, sits at his study and slowly, slowly, thunks his head down onto his desk, valiantly trying to ignore the fast pulse of his heart

luke: //manically vents about it to peanut who, by virtue of being a bird, doesnt get it. just keeps talking at peanut to get a grasp of it all and then lies down on the floor, overwhelmed

mc, sitting in her apartment watching some netflix: ...why do i inexplicably feel as if something very, very important has just happened?

phase 4 of the nxx team polycule is basically:

pining: extreme difficulty level

because pining is already hard when ur pining for one person. what more for an additional 3 more people. and those additional 3 more people are pining back.

and all these boys are SOOOO OBVIOUS with their romantic feelings, in their own special way. the way they show their affection to mc starts to bleed into their interactions with the others and everybody can CLEARLY SEE WHAT IS GOING ON, LOL, but also all the boys are too chickenshit to confront it, because if they confront it, what will even happen??? being in love with each other, all of them, thats going to be such a complicated fucking relationship, holy shit. it's 2030, yeah, being a polyamorous group relationship isnt completely unheard of, but sue them, theyre scared.

but mc (who i forgot to mention already knows of the boys' romantic feelings for her, shes just hasnt made a move yet on any of them because SHES IN LOVE WITH ALL OF THEM AS WELL and shes been trying to figure out how the hell to make that work, she cant bear to choose just one of them, she'd be heartbroken over leaving the rest of them behind) sees that the nxx investigation team is now all pining for each other FULLY and she kinda wants to laugh when she realizes whats going on because like, what are the chances? that this would happen? that they all found each other and their feelings fell into just the right place for nobody to be left behind?

theyre all scared, she can tell. and she is as well, she wont lie.

but shes always had a belief that goodness can prevail with the right work.

and love is one of the greatest goods out there.

phase 5 of the nxx team polycule:

It's Time For Communication, Baby!!!!!

the exact scenes of how this happens is a bit vague to me. it could go two ways: mc going to each of the boys independently to talk about feelings, hers about everybodys and his about everybodys as well. OR they have a fucking meeting about it all together and artem literally schedules it in his google calendar, or something.

either way, they like, actually talk about this. starts casual, maybe over a chill date, maybe over dinner at a nice restaurant, maybe over a walk in the park as the sun is starting to set. but where ever it happens, the end result is the same: a heart is laid out bare and it is taken in gentle, grateful hands.

marius: OKAY, NOW THAT THE FEELINGS ARE OUT OF THE WAY, CAN I PLEASE KISS ONE OR ALL OF YOU, PLEASE, IVE BEEN WANTING TO KISS U GUYS FOR FOREVER

vyn, laughing fondly: has anybody ever told you patience is a virtue? we quite literally just talked it all out.

marius: //needy whining noises

artem, embarrassed: ive...never kissed anybody before

luke, embarrassed but trying to play it Cool: ....same here

mc: kissing is great, you two will love it!

marius: awesome, awesome, so is ANYBODY going to give me a go ahead or WHAT????

phase 6 of the nxx team polycule:

i dont want to say it's happily ever after, once they all get together. thats not really realistic.

they all have their quirks and tendencies and habits. and those will inevitable clash against each other. theyll have their arguments, theyll get upset, theyll sulk and be angry, sometimes. but also...

theyll see each other smile and feel like their love shining so brightly. theyll reach out for another's hand and be held in such a way that makes them think that their heart is in a safe place. theyll love each other and theyll put in the work to continue loving each other. because goodness will prevail.

and they all see each other as the most good people in the world.

so whatever happens, theyll get through it together.

#tears of themis #vyn richter #marius von hagen #tears of themis rosa #artem wing

166 notes · View notes

musclesandhammering · 3 years

Text

“Sylki isn’t even a m/f pairing cause they’re both genderfluid!”

↘️ I really really wanted Loki to be canon genderfluid, but the problem with that is that in Ep 5, they do everything in their power to make both Loki and Sylvie seem Very Very cis. All the Loki’s straight up say they’ve never seen a female version of themselves, and Sylvie says that she was born a woman (and never shows any sign of presenting as anything else). Even if Ep 5 hadn’t happened, though, the only mention of anything gender-related is a little Easter egg in Loki’s file that says “Sex: Fluid”. Easily missed by a casual viewer, so not much confirmation at all.

“You’re biphobic if you have a problem with Sylki!”

↘️ Putting aside the fact that I’m actually bi myself… In real life, it’s totally valid for a bisexual person to only date the opposite sex, but on screen “Show, don’t tell.” is the golden rule. There are plenty of problems with Sylki other than the fact that it’s a m/f ship. However, it’s extremely frustrating for queer people to see the writers patting themselves on the back for giving us one (1) throwaway line that can be easily edited out for homophobic audiences, and then to see absolutely no further acknowledgment of Loki’s supposed attraction to men, along with him being shown openly flirting with 2 different women. It just seems awfully convenient to be able to tell and not show where m/m is concerned and then to show m/f where it isn’t even necessary.

“You just hate that a woman got in the way of your two white dudes kissing!”

↘️ If Sylvie was the main character and she had pretty good chemistry with a woman, and then all of a sudden a male variant of her was introduced and a romance was forced between them, I’d be pretty pissed about that too. I don’t want Sylvie out of the picture! My ideal scenario would be her and Loki being Chaos Twins. And I don’t even want Lokius to be canon! Again, my ideal scenario would be Chaos Twins with their best friend/handler Mobi. This isn’t about her getting in the way of another pairing, it’s about how this pairing in particular is just Not It.

“You just want Loki for yourself, you’d be mad at anyone he was paired with!”

↘️ No I… really don’t? I’m gonna get mauled for saying this, but I don’t even find Loki particularly attractive. Tom? Sure. But Loki? Mmmm… not exactly. Aesthetically pleasing maybe. Intellectually I know that he’s pretty hot, but he doesn’t do anything for me :/ I also really really hate reader inserts sooo yeah lol. And if you’ve seen my blog you’d know I ship him with a lot of people, both male and female.

“Sylvie is her own person so it’s not really selfcest!”

↘️ Except the writers have gone out of their way to make it clear that they are the same person. Not exactly the same, but they’re similar enough that it’s clear that they’re versions of each other. Plus they canonically have the same parents, very very similar DNA, and essentially the same basic origin (adopted, Asgard, etc). They’re not exact clones of one another but they very much are slightly different models of the same person.

“Selfcest isn’t the same as incest!”

↘️ No, it’s even worse lmao. Imagine two people that share parents, DNA, and some life experiences, but they’re even closer than twins…. Lol yeah.

“Ok but you gotta admit selfcest is pretty in character for Loki lololol”

↘️ No it’s not… One of my favourite things about Loki in all 6 movies is that he never had a love interest. Never even a hint of a love interest. And even in this show he makes it clear that he’s never really been in love before- never had anything “real”. And, this considered, people saying that it makes sense that his first and only canon love interest would be a version of himself implies that he’s incredibly narcissistic. Which, despite what some shitty writers try to tell us, he’s not. His narcissism is performative. It’s posturing. He’s incredibly insecure and self-loathing and that ends up manifesting as violence in some instances, and that’s his whole problem. The exact opposite of narcissism. Quite honestly, Loki would never trust or even like himself enough to be romantically interested.

“You just want Loki whump, you hate to see him happy!”

↘️ I do enjoy Loki whump on occasion, but at this point we maxed out on the whump meter about 3 movies back… I absolutely want this poor man to be happy, for once in his damn life. And the show gives us everything but that. Just like people said Ragnarok gave us a happy Loki, when in reality all we got was a humiliated Loki that was beaten down even further to build other characters up and give the audience a laughs… which is pretty much exactly what’s happening here. Not all the time! There’s some super progressive moments for his character development and mental health, but overall? The show isn’t giving us a happy Loki at all, and Sylki definitely hasn’t resulted in a happier Loki so far.

“They have great chemistry though!”

↘️ I’m sure any two characters could have good chemistry if the writing team put 85% percent of their effort for the whole show into squishing a man and woman together and making them kiss, even going so far as to build the plot around it, when they could’ve spent their time and energy improving other aspects of the series.

“Ok you have to admit the blanket scene was pretty cute!”

↘️ Yes, I will admit that! It was adorable actually! But given the myriad of issues I listed above, one cute scene isn’t enough to make me hate the ship any less.

#an anti sylki response handbook #anti sylki #anti sylvie #to an extent #it’s not even really anti sylvie but I know her stans are gonna burn me at the stake if I don’t tag it #loki series negativity #loki spoilers #anti loki series #loki series spoilers #lokius #kinda but not rly cause I don’t even ship them in canon #in fanworks absolutely but do I want it canon? nah #anyway…#I’ll just leave this here and go #wanna also say that if you ship sylki then great! good for you #this is just an extensive list of reasons as to why I don’t #and also why the commen pro s*lki arguments don’t work for me

341 notes · View notes

herrmannhalsteadproduction · 9 months

Text

500 Miles (Chapter Five)

Click here for the Series Rundown where you can find the links to read all of the previous installments (which I highly recommend you do so that this one makes sense.)

Rating: Teen and Up

Warnings: Light Angst, Emotional Conversations, Dealing with Past Trauma, Minor Character Injury, Swearing, Implied Sexual Content, Kissing, An Unholy Amount of Fluff, EXTRA NOTE FOR THIS CHAPTER: Bex has a small panic attack and is helped through it.

A/N: To underscore my previous note, this is an alternate universe so things have unfolded differently. This will not follow the canon arcs exactly by any means. But I hope you'll still enjoy it!

Chapter One Chapter Two Chapter Three Chapter Four

Chapter Five

Bex

Last night had been exactly what Bex needed to get her equilibrium back. Will had shown up in time to eat the last of the pizza and watch a few more episodes of Buffy with them. He’d flopped right down on the floor, leaning back against Connor’s legs, diving into the banter with his mouth full.

And for Bex? Sitting there, crammed together in the living room with a good chunk of her people? …she felt like things might just be okay.

Of course then this morning, Will dragged her out the door for a run at a horrifically early hour and now she hated everything including the sun and fresh air and sweating and—

Blergh.

“Okay,” she panted as she kept pace with Will and Kol. Taking time off last week to let her back bruises fade had lost her a lot of ground in the begrudging acceptance of this routine. “This is officially too much sweating for a Wednesday. You need to entertain me or I’m turning around.”

“What?” Will laughed.

“Talk,” Bex demanded. “Tell me things.”

“Uhhhh—”

Bex wracked her own brain, looking for something to get them started on. Oh! “It was awesome having Connor hang out last night,” she said. “How have things been going with him?”

Will turned bright red. Like, redder than out for a run in July red. Interesting.

“Did Jay say something to you?” Will asked, voice going high at the end.

Very interesting. Clearly, she’d hit on something here. And! Will hadn’t told her about it yet!

Rude.

“No,” she said. “Why? Is everything okay?”

His face smoothed out as he smiled. “Everything is great,” Will said. “He’s great.”

“But…” Bex prompted.

Will kept running, keeping his eyes on the path ahead of them.

“Will!” She hit him with her elbow.

“Ugh! Okay!” He scrunched up his nose. “Just feels weird talking to you about it.”

“Not doing much talking,” she muttered. She understood. She did. There were some things that were probably easier to talk to a brother about. And maybe she didn’t actually want to be a sounding board for wherever this discussion was leading…

Except she did! She and Will were brother and sister, but they were also roomies! They talked about their shit! All of it! They’d bonded!

…but…he also deserved his privacy if he wanted it or whatever so she could be cool with that. She wouldn’t pout.

She must not have been doing a great job of that because Will took a quick look at her face and burst out laughing. “Oh, my god, fine,” he said. “So. You know how Connor and I have been taking it slow…”

“Yeah, and you said he’s been really amazing about that,” Bex said with a nod.

“Exactly!” Will threw his arms out. “So amazing! Too amazing!”

“Ooooooh,” Bex laughed as understanding hit her. “I get it. You’re horny on Main and Connor’s being way too polite at the crosswalk.”

“Aaaand I’m going home.” Will whistled for Kol and started turning around until Bex grabbed at his arm, still laughing.

“Wait! Wait, I’m sorry,” she said. She put them back on the path, slowing down to a walk. “Come on. Let’s workshop this.”

“Bex,” Will groaned and she bumped shoulders with him.

“No, no, no! We can figure it out.” Will had come so far with everything. She didn’t want him turning in on himself now and not going for what he wanted. “What I’m hearing is that you want to move things forward in your relationship physically—”

“This is my nightmare,” Will whispered and she ignored him, pressing on.

“—and Connor is not taking the initiative because he’s trying to be respectful and follow your lead. Right?”

“Pretty much,” Will said, dragging a hand over his face.

“Have you talked to him about any of this?” She was guessing not based on the fact that they were having this conversation, but it was Will so she figured she should ask. He shook his head.

“There hasn’t really been an opportunity lately,” he said.

Fair. Between the Mouse thing and the Jay thing and the AJ thing and the Ty thing, there’d been a lot going on.

“But,” he continued. “I’ve tried to give some…other cues.” The blush was back.

“How did that go?” Bex asked carefully, forcing herself not to giggle at how squirmy he got.

“Uh, they were well received,” Will said. He reached up and pushed her waggling eyebrows away with a hand to her face. “But again, he didn’t make a move to take it any further.” He tilted his head, considering. “Although that one time was probably because we were at work.”

Bex laughed and he grinned widely, not chagrined in any way, shape, or form.

“Yeah, that was a good day,” he said, ducking his chin with a little smirk.

“It sounds like some progress has been made,” Bex said. “You just need a chance to really talk about it. What if we found a way to give you some alone time?” The two of them had more than earned it.

Will nodded slowly.

“Ooh! Want me and Emery to clear out of the apartment for a night?” she asked. They could camp out at Jay’s or maybe Kira and Malia’s place.

“Maybe?” Will frowned lightly as he thought it over.

“Or we could make sure we’re gone for a day or whatever time your schedules sync up. We’ll get you the time, Will,” Bex promised. “You’ll talk and worse comes to worse, you could just jump him and see where it leads.”

“You and Jay, I swear to god,” he shook his head as he chuckled in resignation. He sped up, starting to run again down the path.

“What?" Bex chased after him. “I’m just saying it’s an option! Will!”

***

Emery

Thursday afternoon, Emery stood outside the door of the apartment, keys in hand, preparing herself to go in.

She knew Bex was in there. After going for a run with Will yesterday, then working at the diner, then working at Molly’s, and then going to the gym with Sam this morning; she’d declared the rest of today a ‘work on the graphic novel’ day. She was probably still plugging away on it.

Emery shouldn’t interrupt that.

Except they really needed to talk. Emery had been trying to pin her down for the last couple of days just so they could have this chat and now was as good a time as any but…

Maybe she wasn’t quite as ready for it as she thought.

This was going to be a big change. A good change and a needed one, but scary all at the same time. And she honestly wasn’t sure how Bex was going to take it.

Bex was her best friend. Emery loved her. They were family.

The thing about Bex though, for better or for worse, was that she was all in. She’d stepped up with her whole heart when Emery needed her. Given her space and time and support. And Emery—she had no words for how grateful she was.

But a Bex who was all in might not totally understand why Emery needed to do this.

Might be hurt.

The last thing Emery wanted to do was hurt Bex, but she knew in her heart that this was the right step and the right time to take it so she had to put it all out there and hope for the best.

Okay.

She was doing this.

Emery put her key in the lock and opened the door.

“Hey!” Bex looked up from her table, setting down her pencil. “You’re home a bit early. How was your day?”

“Good,” Emery said, hanging up her bag and kicking off her shoes. “It was good.” She side-stepped the living room and popped into the kitchen. Snacks. Snacks would make this easier. “How was your day?”

“Also good,” Bex called out. “Got a lot done so I feel free and clear to go for my Mouse walk.”

Oh, shit. That was today.

Maybe—maybe that was a good thing. Bex would have someone else to talk to if she needed it.

Emery filled a couple of glasses with juice and grabbed a container of cookies before heading back out to the living room. She set everything down on the coffee table.

Bex’s eyes lit up. “Oooh, snacks!”

“Yeah, come and have a seat,” Emery said, sinking into the couch and patting the spot beside her. “I wanted to talk to you for a bit.”

“Is everything okay?” Bex slowed down, taking a careful look at Emery’s face before sitting down.

“I think it’s good,” Emery said, trying to back that up with a smile. “And I hope you do too.”

Bex narrowed her eyes at that. She reached out and grabbed a cookie, taking a determined bite out of it. “Alright,” she said. “Lay it on me.”

Emery took a deep breath. This was it.

“I think it’s time for me to start looking for my own place.”

***

Bex

“What?” Bex choked, grabbing a glass to wash the cookie fragments down. “Why?” That was a terrible idea. It was too soon. Why—

“First of all, because I can’t keep living here rent free and mooching off you guys,” Emery said, ticking the point off on her fingers.

That was easily solved. “You can pay rent!” Bex said. “And you contribute! You help out with groceries and stuff.”

“Bex,” Emery laughed softly as she scooched closer. “I also can’t keep sharing your room and hogging your bed indefinitely.”

She did have a tendency to starfish. “I’ll talk to Will,” Bex said, brain already in ‘find a solution’ overdrive. “We could look for a three-bedroom apartment. Or maybe rent a house! Then we’d have a yard for Kol—”

“No! That’s—” Emery held up a hand, sighing. “I don’t want you to upend your life for me anymore than you already have.”

“And I want you to be here,” Bex said quietly. “Where I know you’ll be safe.”

Emery sat back, knitting her fingers together in her lap. She was quiet for a few moments and Bex was about to start backing up her argument when Emery finally looked up at her again.

“I want to be safe too,” she said. “And being here has been amazing, but it’s also starting to feel like…I’m hiding out.”

“You’re not—”

“I know I’m not,” Emery said quickly. She shook her head, smiling fondly at Bex before sighing. “You gave me a safe place to land, Bex, and I needed that more than you’ll ever know.” She pulled her legs up onto the couch and leaned into Bex’s side.

Bex followed suit, resting her head on the back of the couch. “I said you could always come here and I meant it.”

“You really did.” Emery reached out and grabbed Bex’s hand in hers. “I just—I’ve been thinking about this for awhile and now, knowing that Ty’s not getting out of jail anytime soon,” she said. “It feels like the right time.”

She leaned forward, excited and intense and earnest all at the same time. “I want to reclaim my life,” Emery said. “To rebuild it for me. The job and the car have been a good start, but I want—I want to make my own safe space, Bex.”

Bex knew it made sense. She knew it was ultimately a good thing and she wanted Emery to heal and be happy.

But another part of her wanted to scream because what if Ty came back and Emery was alone? What if that happened and there was no well-timed arrival of Jay or anybody and Ty actually made it to Emery and—

She couldn’t even think the words.

Bex’d had her fill this year of the people she cared about getting hurt.

…but it wasn’t about her, was it?

“What are you thinking?” Emery asked tentatively.

“…that it really doesn’t matter what I think,” Bex said, trying to smile at her friend, knowing it was coming across stiff and strained. She extricated herself from the couch and headed toward the door. “I should get going,” she said, pulling her shoes on and calling Kol. “I’ve got to go meet Mouse.”

“Bex.” Emery twisted around on the couch, watching her with dismay.

“I’ll see you in a bit.” Bex clipped on Kol’s leash and left. She knew she wasn’t handling this that well and she had to go before she made it worse.

Before everything spilled over and she blurted out her deepest fear.

What if you go and we lose you for good?

***

Mouse

“—no lead up discussion, just ‘I think I should move out’—”

Ease into things, Bex had said last time. Ask what was new.

“—and I know she makes good money at her job, but rent is so expensive! What kind of place can she find on her own? Are we adding a sketchy neighbourhood on top of everything else—”

He’d asked.

“—I should have been more supportive, but she sprung it on me and was I supposed to lie about how I felt—”

Turned out there was a big something new.

Suddenly there was silence. Mouse glanced over to see Bex shaking her head with a rueful look on her face. “I’m sorry,” she said. “I know I sound completely unhinged.”

“You sound like someone who’s worried about their friend,” he said. Mouse had spent plenty of time on both sides of that equation.

Bex sighed heavily and he gently bumped into her side. “Hey.” Reaching down, he took her hand in his, loosely in case she pulled away; intertwining their fingers when she didn’t. “What can I do? You, uh, you need to vent some more? ‘Cause I’ll listen. Or—or we can talk it out?”

That must have been the right thing to say because she swayed into his space with a ghost of a smile. “Thanks, Mouse,” she said. “I think I’m about out of steam on the venting so I should probably move along to talking it out.”

They walked along for a bit, Mouse waiting, letting Bex collect her thoughts.

“I know she can’t stay at our place forever,” she began. “Like, I do actually recognize that.”

“And it sounds like she’s feels it’ll be a good step for her,” Mouse offered.

“Which is so huge and really important!” Bex’s eyes went as she nodded. Then she blew out a breath. “I need to figure out how to be okay with this because it will be a good step for her and I need to stop freaking out about it. Preferably before I go back home.”

Mouse wasn’t quite sure what the right move was. He’d heard enough about Emery’s situation to know it was bad, but he’d missed most of what had happened with Ty once she’d moved into Bex’s place. Especially the worst of it last week which he would never stop kicking himself for.

He’d felt so guilty that he hadn’t been there for Bex; he’d avoided talking about it with her. But had she been talking with anyone?

“I can’t imagine what it was like when he showed up at your place,” Mouse said. Bex’s shoulders instantly went tense and he knew he was treading a fine line. Something his group had shown him was worth walking sometimes.

“I think even if it’s a good step for Emery,” he said. “It’s understandable why the idea of her moving out would bring up a lot of stuff for you.”

Bex squeezed his hand tight, not saying anything for a moment.

“I just, god—” She blinked rapidly as her eyes shone with tears. “—I think about what could have happened. What did happen and how much worse it could have been? And it’s like, everything goes tight, right here.” She released his hand to press a fist to the middle of her chest. “And all I think about is what I should have done differently and what I should do if it happens again and how I can make sure it doesn’t happen again and I can’t—I can’t stop.”

Jesus. Mouse’s own heart did a hard, painful clench. “That…doesn’t sound fun.”

She let out a wet laugh. “No. It’s not.”

“I’m not the best person to give advice about not putting your own fears on other people,” Mouse said. “It’s, uh, it’s something I’m working on myself at the moment.”

“But you think that’s what I’m doing,” Bex said, staring down at the path.

“Trying to work on it kind of makes it easier to recognize,” he said, reaching out to tug on her hand gently until she looked up at him. “Ed’s always saying that people grow how they need to grow and you don’t have to understand it to support it.”

“I don’t want to get in the way of her being okay,” she whispered.

“It’s important that you’re okay too,” he said.

“Part of me feels ridiculous for even being this upset,” she burst out. “What happened with me wasn’t nearly as bad as what Emery went through and Jay stopped it before—before it could worse so—so I shouldn’t even—”

“No, Bex, no,” Mouse said, stopping their walk and pulling her over to the side of the path. “Don’t do that. Don’t minimize it, okay? I wasn’t even there and I know it was scary as shit. Jay told me. So please don’t do that.”

“I don’t want it to be big.” Bex gave a defeated little shrug. “But it keeps sneaking up on me.”

Fuck it. They might be taking it slow and taking the time to talk it out, but Mouse couldn’t stand there while she looked like that and not reach out.

He put his arms around her and she instantly nestled into the hug.

“Are the lessons with Jay helping at all?”

Bex grumbled into his chest. “Not yet, but I think they will eventually.”

That was good. That was something concrete she could rely on.

Maybe there was something else concrete he could offer her. “You remember my friend, Ed?” he asked and she nodded, her hair tickling his chin. “…one of his jobs is setting up home security systems.”

“One of his jobs?” Bex mumbled, still resting against him.

“He’s, uh, kind of a renaissance man.”

“Wait.” Her head popped up and she leaned back to look at him, arms still wrapped around his waist. “Home security—you think he could help set something up wherever Emery ends up moving?”

“Pretty sure,” Mouse said. “And I know enough about it that I could help and that would cut the costs. Make it a bit more affordable.”

“Mouse.” Bex’s eyes went soft and she ducked back in, squeezing him as tight as she could. “Thank you. That would be amazing. Thank you.”

“Happy I can help.” He was ninety-nine percent sure Ed would be fine with it. A batch of Bex’s cookies could probably tip it over to one hundred.

Bex pulled away, cheeks going pink as she looked everywhere but his actual face.

Right.

They were a little close at the moment.

She moved to step back and almost fell over, Mouse catching her at the last second. “What the?” Bex looked down at their legs where Kol had managed to walk around in a circle, completely entangling them both in the leash.

He sat on the path beside them, a wide doggy grin on his face.

“Seriously, Kol?” Bex groaned.

A sharp bark was the only reply they got and then Kol lowered his head to nudge a stick toward their feet with his nose.

“I think someone’s feeling neglected,” Bex whispered as she began extricating them from the leash.

“Lucky for Kol, my throwing arm is top notch,” Mouse said, picking up the stick.

“Oooh,” Bex said. “Does Trudy know that? She’s gonna be recruiting you for the Grudge Match.”

Mouse snorted. “She’s already measured me for a t-shirt.”

***

Bex

An hour later, Bex shooed Kol into the apartment and then followed, kicking her shoes off as she shut the door behind her. He made a beeline for the couch where Emery was sitting with her sketch book.

“Hey, boy,” Emery said, managing to set her things down on the table just before Kol launched himself into her lap. She shot a careful look at Bex. “Good w-a-l-k?”

“Really good,” Bex said, rolling over the back of the couch to land on the cushion beside Emery with a little ‘oof.’ “He’s making it really hard not to just—” She growled, raising her hands to mimic grabbing Mouse by the shirt. “—ugh, just grab him and kiss the hell out of him.”

“How rude of him,” Emery said mildly, raising an eyebrow at her.

“Yeah. He has other good qualities though.” Bex sighed, sinking into the couch and wriggling her feet under Emery’s legs.

Emery waited her out.

“Will you at least let me help you find a place?” Bex asked.

“Bex.” She reached out to grab onto her leg and shake it. “Obviously. Yes. Please.”

“And will you let Mouse and his friend put a security system in?” Bex held her breath.

Emery looked shocked for a moment before nodding. “That would be amazing,” she said with a sniff.

“Okay.” Bex scrambled up and hunted down her tablet from the bookshelf before flopping down again beside Emery. “Then let’s find you an awesome apartment.”

***

Connor

It took until Friday morning, but his and Will’s schedules had finally aligned so they could go on a run together. Bex had declined to join them. Will said that she’d declared she was going to cut back on her runs if she also had to go to the gym for strength training because ‘there’s only so many hours in the day and I refuse to spend more of them sweating than I have to.’

Connor was worried Will might be bummed out about Bex going on less runs with him, but apparently, he was an acceptable substitute.

They ran together in an easy rhythm as Will filled him in on the latest developments with Emery deciding to find a place of her own. Will and Bex both had a bit of trepidation about it, but everyone ultimately agreed it was a good step. It was great to see Emery coming back into her own.

Will’s little recap though was also reminding him of how hectic everything had been lately. Felt like none of them had had a chance to catch their breath. And there was Will in the middle of it all, trying to support Bex and Jay all while work hadn’t exactly been quiet.

He deserved a break.

And Connor wouldn’t mind them getting more time together with just the two of them.

Not that he was expecting anything!

But having time as a couple now that things were calming down would be nice. Connor started mentally going through his calendar, piecing together when they both had a chunk of time off.

“Do you have any plans tomorrow?” he asked during the next lull in conversation.

“Nothing yet,” Will said, shooting him a sideways grin. “Figured I’d see what you were up to.”

“How about you come over to my place tomorrow night,” Connor suggested. “And I’ll cook you dinner.”

Will slowed down, his grin falling into something softer. “That sounds amazing,” he said. Then a wicked gleam game into his eyes and he leaned in. “And maybe I could stay over…”

***

Will

Find the time to talk. Or jump his bones.

These were the two helpful pieces of advice his siblings had given him.

Connor gave him the opening and Will figured being spontaneous and leaping in there with his suggestion was a happy medium between those sage bits of wisdom. Judging by the way Connor’s eyes went hazy as he blue-screened a bit; he wasn’t opposed to the idea. Will laughed and started to jog off before a thought hit him. He didn’t want any miscommunication messing up this plan so he had to make sure.

Doubling back to Connor, who still hadn’t moved, Will stepped in close. “Just so we’re absolutely clear,” he murmured. “I’m talking about having sex—”

“Yeah, no, yes,” Connor said, shaking off his stupor. “I got that and yes, that—that sounds like a good plan. I am on board. Yes, please. If you’re sure—”

Will cut him off with a kiss. “Absolutely sure.” He said once they broke apart.

A slow grin spread across Connor’s face. “It’s a date then.”

Will couldn’t wait. In the meantime— “Race you to the lamp post.”

He took off, laughing as Connor cursed and chased after him. Will thought might even let him win this one so Connor could show off his dance moves and make a good day even better.

Click here to read Chapter Six. Click here to read Chapter Seven. Click here to read Chapter Eight. Click here to read Chapter Nine. Click here to read Chapter Ten. Click here to read Chapter Eleven. Click here to read Chapter Twelve. Click here to read Chapter Thirteen. Click here to read Chapter Fourteen. Click here to read Chapter Fifteen. Click here to read Chapter Sixteen.

Click here to read 500 Miles on ao3:

Second A/N: Things get a tiny bit spicy in the next chapter with Will and Connor's date, but as it says in the tags, everything is implied. There won't be anything graphic so I think it'll still fall within the T rating. But please give me a shout if you disagree.

And here is the tag list (let me know if you wish to be added or removed):

@sorry-i-spaced, @thegirlwhowishedeveryonelived, @ivyalmighty, @thewannabewriter, @lexhalstead3, @multifandomgrl08, @sensitivemallysix, @thebewingedjewelcat, @emme-looou,

18 notes · View notes