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tobi-momo · 3 years

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A Misunderstanding

PAIRING: Kuroo Tetsurou x Reader

GENRE: Angst | Hurt/Comfort | Reverse Comfort

WORD COUNT: 3k

A/N: ok ik this is long but this idea came from literally nowhere but i decided to write it thank you @combat-wombatus for helping me you helped put ideas in my brain<333 now i wasnt originally going for a happy ending but im really bad at angst so enjoy the shitty ending :)

“Please, Y/n, you know I didn't mean it,” he pleaded, his large hands desperately grabbing at your form while you push him away, your breaking sobs making his heart shatter. “Please, baby, don’t leave me,” he begs, falling on his knees in front of your trembling body, not being able to tear his eyes off of your heartbroken ones. He needed you to stay. He needed to show you that he isn’t that guy and that he would do anything for you. It was a one time thing. He wasn’t even sober. It wasn’t him. It was the alcohol. He wasn’t thinking straight. Please forgive him, please, please, please.

But you couldn’t. No matter how hard or how much you loved him and wanted to, the pain that ripped at your heart every time you looked at him was too much to bear. So you didn’t. You turn your blurry, glassy eyes away from him as he grabs your hand and forces it into his; your lips quivering and knees shaking. You couldn’t keep the betrayal and agony inside, whining and weeping at him, your knees giving out before your legs slam against the floor, your head near the carpet as you try and keep your affliction at bay.

“Y/n, please,” he whines, tears streaming down his pale cheeks; his admission of his unfaithfulness drained the color from his face. “Please forgive me, I need you, I love you so much.”

“W-” you sniffle, not knowing what to say. You knew you didn’t have to say anything at all, that you didn’t owe him any words, but you just...you just needed to know. “Why,” your voice quivered and cracked, your throat sore, “why did you,” you take a long breath, grabbing your chest to try and stop the heartache, the sudden cramp that formed where it used to be filled with warmth and love, “do this to me? With her?” You look up at him once with wide, searchful eyes as you ponder the reasons and look for the answers in his empty pupils.

“I wasn’t thinking straight, baby, I didn’t know what I was doing, please,” his voice stammers, trying to get you to understand that he really didn’t know what he was doing. “I would never do this to you, I-” “But you did.” Your tone is no longer sad and confused, but angry and fed up. His head backing up quickly, not expecting the response. “You made a promise, Tetsurou, remember?” You glare at him with menacing eyes as you hold up the very finger he kissed and placed the ring on on your wedding day. The beautiful diamond ring that had his initials carved in the interior and little gorgeous jewels that made the walls sparkle once hit with the hot sun was no more; the dark, gloomy piece of rock and metal meaning nothing but lies and mistrust.

“No, Y/n, please. Don’t do this to me,” he adjures guiltily.

“Don’t do this to you?” Your voice laced with deadly venom, standing and backing up, wiping your mouth with your hand in annoyance, placing it on your hip. “You did this to me! You did this to us! You went out! You got drunk! You fucked someone else! And not even a random girl! No! You just had to fuck your ex!” Your voice cracked again before you inhaled sharply and covered up your struggle.

“Y/n, I didn’t know what I was doing!”

“And that’s an excuse?? What, so now you can go fuck whoever you want and say ‘I didn’t know what I was doing!’” you mimic, “so you can get away with it every time?”

He didn’t answer. He looked at the ground, understanding exactly where you came from.

“Hm? Are you gonna answer me, or sit there like a coward?”

He could tell fully well you were just saying this because you were hurt. You didn’t mean any of it. You loved him. No matter what, you will always love him. Trusting him was out of the box for a while, maybe forever. But he can’t lose you. He knew you were soulmates- he knew you were made for each other. There was a reason you guys made it this far and only had big problems now. He needed to find that reason and use it for himself to win you back. He needed you back.

“I’m sorry,” he apologizes, your dramatic hand gestures coming to a halt at his words, your figure coming to a stand still as you wait for him to finish. “You don't deserve this. You don’t deserve me. Please know that it was a mistake and that I’ll never do it again ever, ever, ever,” he repeats, wanting it to sound as sincere as he means. “Just please give me a chance to make this up to you, please don’t leave me by myself without you,” he sobs out, putting his head in his hands.

You knew you shouldn’t feel bad for him. But god-fucking-dammit are you feeling bad for him. You knew you still loved him, you knew he still loved you- that much was obvious. You couldn’t see him for a while, no. Could you guys work it out? Maybe stitch the wound? Wait until the scar is barely visible anymore? Would that even work?

“Tetsurou,” a single, hot tear dripping down your face as you point to the ground. “I don’t know if I can ever trust you again.”

“I know, I know, just please give me a chance to help fix this!” He cries at your feet, his body bundled in a ball of self hatred and guilt. “I can do it, baby. I can help things go back to normal.”

“I don’t think they ever will be normal again.”

He whines, trying to negotiate with you as much as he can. “Let me fix us. Let me give you my everything again, let me show you that I’m all yours and no one else's, please,” he moans in anticipation for rejection, knowing the chances of you agreeing were next to zero.

The next few hours are silent. Him alone in the bedroom. Crouching on the floor as he ponders your possible answer. You work in the kitchen, making food to satisfy your appetite. He could hear your sniffles from the bedroom and picture you wiping your tears as you carry the pots on the stove. God, he was the biggest piece of shit ever known. What the fuck went through his mind when he was fucking his ex? He only remembers some of it, them waking up in bed together after, only wearing undergarments underneath the sheets and him holding her waist as if she were you. He thought they had ended on good terms, knowing that they were better as friends. He rushed out the door, not being able to stay in the same room without getting sick. He knew what he had to do.

He opens the door to the living room, a slight creak gaining your attention as you stir the sauce in the pan. Your eyes are puffy, your lip still trembling as you try to turn away from him. He only takes about two steps forward before he stops, trying to find the words he wants to say.

“Listen, I know you said you needed time, and I’m not rushing you at all whatsoever. I want to give you all the time in the world to think this over. If you need, I can go to Kou’s house and stay there for a while. He won’t mind. I just want to give you the space you deserve.”

You nod in response, your head still facing away before he whispers an “I love you” before he slips out of the apartment.

~.~.~.~

The next few days were tortue. Not being able to sleep in the same bed he would sleep in with you, not being able to watch the same tv shows, not being able to even be in his presence at least once a day like you used to melted a hole of despair inside you: eating away at your emptiness, taking away the numbness that you so desperately needed right now. The feeling came back- the one that you tried shutting out three hours ago. It crept up at you, flipping your stomach and weighing your lungs down to the floor, your throat sore and dry. Your eyes wet with a blurry wall as your tears build up once again, missing your cheeks as you crouch down looking at the floor, falling on the tile. The droplets containing your anguish splatter on the ground, your raggedy whimpers echoing throughout the vacant apartment, making it all the more obvious he wasn’t there.

Knock knock knock

Was that the door?

Your wide, unbelieving eyes turned to the wooden door frame; the knocks getting louder and faster. You quickly stand up and try to collect yourself, preparing to have a long talk with Tetsurou. You grab the handle, turning it- the door opening with a tiny creak.

Oh.

“Hi! Kuroo left his jacket at the party the other day, is he here?”

Oh, that bitch.

“No. He’s not.” You deadpan, not finding her cheery, happy expression amusing.

“Oh no! Uh, well, here, can you give this back to him for me?”

“Stop smiling at me like you aren’t part of the reason he’s gone.” You snark, glaring at her with sharp eyes as she backs up, confused.

“W-what?”

“You heard me. Don’t act fucking clueless.”

“Excuse me? Who are you to talk to m-”

“Oh, cut the shit,” you roll your eyes, “I know you slept with Tetsurou, you don’t need put on whatever the fuck this is,” you gesture at her.

“What the hell are you talking about? What are you, fucking crazy?” Your eyes narrow in confusion, your disgusted scowl lessening at her words.

“Right. You probably don’t remember because you were blacked out,” you add sarcastically. “He told me what you guys did. Now you know. So, I would love it if you would just leave.”

“What are you- Me and Kuroo didn’t do shit last night. I drank like two beers and was hanging out with another girl the entire time,” she explains, looking offended. Your face loosens into an expression she couldn’t read. “He blacked out early and passed out on the couch while I was busy talking with the other girl.”

“Huh?” You whisper, your disoriented thoughts not aligning to a proper conclusion.

“I didn’t go to bed until like,” she thought back, “I don’t know, three in the morning? There were people passed out on the floor so I decided to take the guest bedroom with her. I was still awake when Kuroo came into the room, I’m guessing because he thought it was yours, based off of how he kept mumbling your name and shit,” she exhales, “he grabbed onto me once he got in and just clung.” You glower at her, huffing. She sees this, sighing before continuing, “Calm down, remember nothing happened. Remember that girl? She ended falling off the bed because I was scooting away from his clingy ass.” You look at her blankly, trying to fit the pieces together. “She ended up leaving the party completely,” she mumbled in embarrassment before you speak up.

“Then why did he tell me you guys had sex?” You mutter quietly, although assuming she heard since her head backed up while she quickly scoffs.

“I swear to God, that man. Listen.” You look up into her eyes- her genuine eyes. “Me and Kuroo didn’t do a single thing. I didn’t do anything to him and he didn’t do anything to me. I’ll have a conversation with him later because he is an absolute dumbass,” she breathed.

What the fuck?? You were just supposed to believe her?

“How am I supposed to believe that?”

“Me and him ended a long time ago. I don’t like him like that and I haven’t for a while. And seeing he was bragging about you the entire time at the party, he’s over me, too. Besides, I’m not even into guys that much anymore anyways,” she grinned and winked at you. The shock and realization hit you like a truck. She wasn’t even- oh my God. She chuckled at your expression; you ran away from her to the counter to get your phone, quickly unlocking it and tapping on Tetsurou’s contact.

“Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck,” you mumble over and over. To tap the call button, listening to it ring as you bring your phone up to your ear, hearing him pick up the phone almost immediately after.

“Y/n? Are you okay?” He sounded worried. It’s only been about a week, he had hoped that you weren’t going to leave him.

“Get over here, right now, Tetsurou.” Your voice made it seem like it was urgent, so he quickly picked up his jacket from the couch, and you could hear the jingling of his keys as he grabbed them and opened the door, almost slamming it shut once he left.

~.~.~.~

“Y/n?” He asked at the open front door, wondering why it wasn’t closed. “Y/n, you have to be careful and close the door, we have them for a reason, you know,” he said as he walked in. Even after being at the line of a break-up, he still cares for your well-being. He didn’t even do anything wrong and he was still caring for you as a loved one should. He always did everything to make you feel comfortable and safe, so once he knew that he had slept with his ex he was completely devastated to his core. He didn’t want to do this to you, but you had the right to know.

“Tetsu.” You called. Already back to nicknames? This is good, right?

“Yes? Y/n?” He was scared, to say the least, feeling awkward and not knowing what to do. He walked scarcely towards your figure sitting on the couch, not caring to drop his keys and jacket on the counter. He had a feeling this might go wrong.

“We need to talk.” Shit. This is exactly what he didn’t want to hear. Hearing those words he couldn’t help but think that you were going to make him pack his stuff and go. “So, I talked with your ex.” You speak slowly, not wanting your words to come out wrong. You don’t want him to take any of this in a bad way at all. Yet his eyes widen drastically, his heartbeat racing and his nerves pricking him. “You are just one big dummy, aren’t you?”

What? What are you talking about?

“What?”

“You didn’t sleep with her. She told me everything that happened that night. She’s not even into guys anymore. Tetsu-”

This couldn’t be happening. Not only did he accuse himself of cheating, he accused himself of cheating with his ex, and that he cheated with his ex at a party, while you two are married. And then it turns out it wasn’t true? What the hell was wrong with him? He jeopardized your entire relationship because he was too drunk to know what was going on.

“Wait, what?” He yells, angrily sitting down on the couch, “so you’re telling me-” you nodded and hummed an ‘mhm’ in response. His hands find their way to his hair, pulling at the roots and scratching his scalp, his low grunts of pain and fury seeping out of his throat as he frustratingly comprehends what he just did.

You rush over to him, grabbing his wrists and pushing them down to his lap as fast as you can, making his eyes find their way to your blown out pupils. You can see the hot tears prickle down his cheek as he frowns at you, completely and utterly defeated.

“Tetsu, I don’t want you to hurt yourself, it’s okay,” you reassure, giving him a happy smile. He wanted to smile back, but he couldn’t control the broken sob that escaped him. “Hey, hey,” you try to grab his attention as he pulls his head down, crying. “It’s okay, baby, it’ll be okay.” You wrap your arms around his head, protecting him as you softly coo and ‘shh’ him quietly in his ear. ‘I’m sorry’ kept coming out of his mouth as he clinged to you, not being able to help his want to be closer to you. The realization that he just almost broke your heart completely and he had worried about divorce for this shit made him want to just rip his scalp out. He was so stupid. So, so so, stupid. “Tetsu, look at me, please. Look at me,” you whisper, bringing your hand to his chin, dragging it up so you could catch sight of his hazel irises. His eyes red and puffy, his cheeks wet and his eyes droopy, you couldn’t do anything but frown at the sight. He hated himself right now, not wanting to face the embarrassment and the humiliation of the situation.

“You don’t deserve me, I’m so sorry,” he whimpered in your arms, gripping them tighter and tighter for comfort- you knowing that he needed it right now. You had already pulled him into your chest, feeling his wet tears soak your shirt, your hands rubbing his back and your fingers gently grazing his throbbing scalp.

“It’s okay, I forgive you, Tetsu, you did the right thing by telling me you did it instead of hiding it from me, and then it turns out you didn’t do it at all.” Your cheeks start to feel hot, and you don’t even realize your sniffles until you could feel a dam break at your water line. You couldn’t stop them, the tears of relief. You didn’t want to stop them. You were glad that they were her, glad that they were for him, glad they were because you knew the truth, glad because you knew you two would be okay.

You looked back at your ring, watching it bloom like a flower in the spring, the meaning coming back to your marriage. It wasn’t just metal and rock anymore, it was a gorgeous promise.

“I love you, Tetsurou. Don’t forget that. You’re staying with me, alright?” you whisper into his hairline.

“Thank you,” he cries.

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blueflamedemon · 3 years

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BlueSky { Dabi x OC }

Chapter Three - Call Me Sir Again

*Chapter Summary - After butting heads a couple of times, Dabi comes to the conclusion that he and Sora are very much alike in many ways, including something that he will never admit to.

Chapter one HERE

Weeks went by with no word from Shigaraki. Sora and the others grew worried that he had been captured, so Sora took to watching the news every day to make sure he and the rest of her new friends hadn't been captured, since none of them self comfortable enough to check in with each other too often.

She was keeping her head low, being careful when she went out into public for too long, making sure not to in one area for too long. Somewhere down the line, Dabi found her a wig that hid her face enough and made her look like a whole new, younger person. It was a bit surprising when he came back one day and gave it to her out of nowhere, though she was very impressed with it.

The first few days, Dabi bought them a room in a little air b&b on the outskirts of town, tucked deep into the woods, so there would be no disturbances. Mostly, he got the place so they had somewhere to shower quickly and sleep it off for a few hours, though both were pretty difficult with her leg bandaged up.

After that, he decided it would be best if they rented a small apartment, something where Sora could hide easily and gave them both enough space to sleep--when Dabi showed up, that was.

Dabi had taken to leaving for days at a time, not calling her to check in or let her know when he might be coming back. He'd appear for a little while to make sure she was doing okay and disappear sometime during the night.

Normally, she heard him slipping out. It was hard for her to fall asleep, so she laid awake and stared out the window that her bed sat in front of, listening to the sounds of the waves crashing against the shore and Dabi's shallow breaths until he woke up. She found herself asking him where he was going at all hours of the night, but all he would ever tell her was that he was looking for recruits.

"I don't understand why you can't wait for Shigaraki's word." Sora said one day after Dabi climbed through her opened window and sat at the tiny table. "You also have a key; you don't have to become Spiderman."

"Finding new villains for the League can't wait." Dabi stated firmly, grabbing for a piece of toast that Sora had just made for herself. "When he does give us that call, I want to be ready."

"It sounds like you're trying to create your own League. Isn't there some guy that's helping Shigaraki find recruits? He found you and Himiko." Sora took the piece of toast back from him and took a huge bite out of it.

Dabi rolled his eyes and stood up, making his way over to the fridge and pulling the door open. He leaned over to look inside. "Yeah, yeah, yeah. But there might be someone he misses. Don't you have any juice boxes?"

"Are you two?" Sora raised an eyebrow. "There's a whole carton of juice in there. Grab a cup like a normal human being." She sat in the chair, seeing as only one came with the apartment, she wanted to sit in it to finish eating her breakfast.

Grumbling something she couldn't understand, Dabi reached in and pulled out an energy drink that she stored in there for training, though she hardly ever drank them because she stopped at a cafe just down the street before she trained. It was a little problem. "Why aren't you working on your Quirk?"

"You told me to take the day off. I'm really going to need you to decide what you want, sir."

Dabi was beside her instantly. He sat the drink down on the table and lifted her chin up with a single finger. "Call me 'sir' again." He breathed.

She gasped, nearly choking on the last piece of toast. Looking up at Dabi, she saw his eyes were wider than usual, and his brows were knitted together, almost in confusion. "Excuse me?" Was all she could say.

"Just what I thought. Princess better not mouth off again." He huffed and let go of her chin.

Sora grabbed his wrist, right where his burn scars ended, and she felt each one of the metal hoops that were perminetally attached. The first time she ever touched one, she thought it would be gross, like touching a reptile, but that wasn't exactly it. The scars did feel rough, but it still felt like skin. When she touched him the first time, she couldn't help but to pause and stare, which made Dabi think she was appalled, and it caused a rift in between them for a couple of days. "Is that why you've stuck around for so long? You think you can get some?"

Dabi hesitated, caught off guard by the fact he was just grabbed. His eyes flicked up to meet hers. "Somebody needs to take care of you."

****

Himiko was the one who called Sora the most. She would talk on the phone for hours, telling Sora about the boys she met, but that they just couldn't stand up to Izuku Midoriya.

When she was done explaining her need for Midoriya's blood, she would always ask how things were going with Dabi and if anything had sparked between them yet. And every time, Sora would groan and tell Himiko that nothing would ever happen between the two.

"He isn't my type." Sora would exclaim.

"But you're his." Himiko would giggle on the other end of the phone. "And last week, you told me that he got mad at you for talking to a delivery guy for too long."

"He didn't want the guy to realize he was talking with an escaped hero turned villain."

"Whatever helps you sleep at night."

It was rare to hear from any of the other villains, though she assumed they were just trying their best not to screw this up for any of them. When they did talk, they refrained from giving their location, even went so far as to not really mentioning places they visited. If one of them was caught, they would never be able to give away locations of the League.

As time went on, Sora read some rather concerning articles about charred bodies found in dark allies all throughout Japan. Police thought it strange because there were no other identifiable things that were burned, just the bodies, and most of them were hard to justify as an actual body. It was clear where Dabi had been running off to in the middle of the night.

"Dabi?" Sora opened the bathroom door to see the mysterious boy sitting on the bed, his coat draped over the foot of the mattress, and his shoes kicked off at the door, for once. She let out a small sigh of relief. "I told you to knock on the bathroom door if I'm in the shower."

Dabi rested his head against the wall, his eyes closed and his hands clasped over his stomach. "Mmmhm. You tell me a lot of things."

"Seriously, Dabi. One of these days I'm going to open this door and that's when my Quirk is going to mysteriously start working." She began drying her hair with a towel, squeezing as much water out as she could. "I keep thinking somebody broke in."

"That'll never happen on my watch."

"How will you know? You're off all day, burning people."

His eyes opened and they shifted over to her. "What do you mean by that?"

"I mean, you're all over the news. Keep going and you're going to get caught. That wasn't the point of all this." She threw the towel up to dry and walked over to the closet to pick out some clothes.

"I am?" She felt the smirk to his voice and she refrained from rolling her eyes.

"Not the point. You better slow down. How many people have you killed?"

"I only killed those who weren't worthy."

"Aren't worthy?" Sora turned around to face him. "Dabi, that sounds crazy."

"I am crazy, princess." He winked at her without missing a beat. "I kill people, remember?"

"When I met you, I had killed more people than you." Sora reminded him. She pulled out a skater dress with the ribs cut out and a pair of biker shorts to go underneath it. "So that little act you have going on? Not impressive."

Dabi was beside her in a second, one hand against the door of the closet, causing Sora to gasp and drop her clothes to the floor. She held her robe together as she stared up at him. "A while back I told you to remember your place. That still applies. You're still the pro hero in training in my eyes and you know how I feel about those ass hats." He said through gritted teeth, peering down at her with a blood-thirsty look swimming in his eyes.

"Then kill me." Sora put it simply, giving him an easy out. There were days that she was sure Dabi was tired of babysitting her, probably even sick of waiting for her Quirk to get back in working order. She never asked for this life, never asked to be a hero nor a villain, it didn't matter to her either way she went at this point. If she stuck around long enough to reek havoc on those who wronged her, she was happy, but not if it meant working with somebody who couldn't treat her as an equal. "Kill me if you feel so inclined to do so. But try to find somebody out there with as much hatred for those heroes. They didn't care about helping me, either. The one mistake I made, they threw away the key and never gave me a second thought. Never bothered to check in on me, to ask how I was doing. They pumped me full of drugs to keep my Quirk at bay and nearly killed me in the process. So go ahead, Dabi, kill me if you think for a second that I would ever go back to being called a hero."

He was silent for a moment as he towered over her, hunching to get in her face. Inches away from her nose, she caught a whiff of burning flesh, causing her to believe Dabi had just finished another one of his mass murders. It was a bit early for that, but she didn't put it passed the blue flamed boy, he was eager to kill now that he was on his streak.

For a moment, Sora thought he might burn her to a crisp right there. There was no emotion to his eyes, though his mouth twitched a few times as if he were going to say something. When he didn't, he broke their eye contact and gazed down at her lips. Butterflies broke free in her tummy and she felt goosebumps appear on the back of her neck. Was he thinking about kissing her? Or murdering her?

Dabi pulled back, slouching as he tucked his hands into his coat pockets. He rarely ever wore anything to hid himself, which made Sora wonder how he hadn't been caught yet. "How did it feel?"

Blinking, Sora looked up at him, still clutching her robe against her. "How did what feel?"

"To be abandoned by Endeavor and the other pros after promising to make you a better hero."

"Worthless." Sora said without thinking. "Like I just lost..." She paused, unsure if she wanted to get into her true feelings after that moment with Dabi. "He was a tough mentor, but I always viewed him as a father figure, seeing as I never had one. In school, he picked me to intern for him. He picked me after I graduated to be trained along side him, to better myself. He wanted me to be as strong as he was. He was harsh and had no real social skills, but I thought that he truly did care for me, somewhere deep down."

"He has no feelings." Dabi huffed. "None of the heroes do. The world would be much better without them around."

Sora always had a strange feeling that Dabi had more to his backstory than he let on. In fact, she wasn't sure he ever went into detail about why he hated everyone so much. Day by day, she saw his hatred for the pro heroes grow. Something happened to him, and she wasn't going to push it, but it felt bigger than just locking him up and throwing away the key. "I'm going to get dressed. Still be here when I get out?" She asked, calmly.

He turned his head to the opened window, which he'd previously climbed into, despite him having a key to the apartment. "Dunno."

"I'd like it if you stayed. You need a break from those murders of yours before you cremate more of yourself." She stated, picking up her clothes and walking into the bathroom, not really expecting him to stick around just because she asked. Dabi did what he wanted, when he wanted. That was why he never stuck around, he had a mission--a duty, and he was going to finish it out on his own.

She turned around and walked back into the bathroom, wondering if she should tell Dabi the whole truth about her hero days, but the thought of replaying those moments caused her skin to itch and she felt her stomach tighten. Maybe if she kept it to herself until she was ready.

Looking into the mirror, Sora saw a girl she no longer recognized. The girl staring back at her was different from the girl she saw a few months ago. This one had more freedom, despite her current situation. She had friends, she had a family. And it only took them a few days to really accept her. How ironic.

With her clothes on, she stepped out of the bathroom to see Dabi gone, the window wide open as if he had just left. She sighed, wondering if he would ever stay long enough for them to have a normal conversation.

Her phone started to buzz on the table. She picked it up without looking at the name, assuming it was Himiko. It was around that time for her to call in and check up on her.

"Hello?"

"I can't get Dabi to answer his phone. I assume he's still with you." Shigaraki's cold voice was on the other end.

"He just left." She stated, taking a seat on the bed. "Why?"

"Catch him and tell him it's time. I'll message you the location. Bring that asshole if you have to drag him by his hair!" He ordered. Sora heard the faint buzz as the line cut off.

"Nice to talk to you, too." She mumbled, glancing down at the message that flashed across her screen.

She saved opening it for later, so she wouldn't forget, and looked for Dabi's number. She quickly called him with no answer, which was a bit weird. He rarely answered his phone, but he typically picked up for hers.

Something felt wrong. She tried to call Dabi again, and this time it went straight to his voicemail. She pulled the phone away and looked at the number, making sure she was calling the right person.

Is he ignoring me? She thought as she typed up a quick message to tell him that Shigaraki called and they were all meeting up soon. Hitting send, the message failed immediately. He turned his phone completely off...

****

"You still haven't heard from Dabi?" Himiko asked as she twirled one of her knives in the air. "What a prick."

"I left a voicemail and told him what happened back at the warehouse. He hasn't stopped by the apartment, either." Sora watched out the window of the apartment, hoping by some chance she would see him prowling around outside.

"Maybe he was killed. I've seen the news, he's been a busy man." Himiko shrugged then paused. She looked up at Sora, her eyes wide and her mouth opened. "I'm sorry... you liked him, didn't you? I'm sure he's fine!"

Sora felt her cheeks warm up at the thought of liking Dabi. She couldn't fall for a guy like him, he was emotionally unavailable, a guy who could never feel anything towards her at all. He made that abundantly clear from the moment they ran away together. "I don't know what I think about him anymore. I mean, what kind of guy does this to a girl he's helping?" She sighed. "I've lost all progress we made..."

"Are you saying that you can't use your Quirk still?" The little girl tilted her head.

"I'm saying that it's hard since Dabi quit pushing me. I can't explain it, but it's like he knew how to get under my skin, make me angry, and that always helped me power up. Anger, it fuels me."

"Here," Toga raised her knife in the air, ready to slash somebody. "Let me take a swing at you, see how angry you get."

Sora giggled and shook her head. "I don't think so." She looked over at her friend. "What does Overhaul want with me? He said he was working on a drug to stop Quirks. What could he possibly want with me?"

During this meeting at the warehouse, Twice had brought a potential new recruit named Overhaul. The interview was meant to be nice and pleasant with no trouble, so Tomura claimed. Of course, nothing went exactly as planned and in the process, they lost Big Sis Magne and Compress' arm. After the fact, Overhaul warned Tomura and the others that he would be expecting Sora change sides and start working with him, as he could use someone with her type of power.

If only Dabi had been there, she wondered if Magne would still be alive, or if Compress would still have his arm. Today showed her just how much they really needed Dabi and his flames, and she bet that he knew that, too. If only he stuck around long enough when they actually needed him.

"I'm gonna kill him." Himiko said through gritted teeth. "Him and every single one of his members. They can all die."

"Dabi would have had him up in flames." Sora cracked a small smile, thinking back to the night of the bar. He'd let his walls down just enough to show concern for her. Regardless if he was actually worried or not, it felt nice that somebody was willing to fight for her.

Toga paused, then smiled, too. "Yeah... he would have. Hey, are you gonna be okay if I head out? Twice asked me to stop by his place for a sec and I don't want Tomura to think we're ganging up behind his back."

Sora waved a hand and nodded. "Go ahead, I actually just want to rest a little while, maybe go on a walk."

Sora threw on some shoes and a jacket, deciding on walking Toga outside before they went their separate ways at the fork in the road. She needed a walk to clear her head, to get her mind off of the Overhaul thing. It amazed her that two villains wanted her on their team, and yet they knew that she was Quirkless until she could heal from all the damage. Of course, once she got back into her groove, she'd be unstoppable.

Her usual park was closed due to an attack earlier that day, so Sora took a route to her second favorite place, an abandoned stretch of beach. It wasn't a very large one, in fact, you could see from one end to the other pretty easily during the day, but it was still nice and private. There was a little shack sitting above one of the rock formations, which Sora took to hiding in a couple of times, just to get away.

She left her shoes on the boardwalk to feel the sand between her toes as she walked along the sand, sticking close to the water. For someone who hated water, she loved to sit and listen to the sound of the waves crashing against the rocks, and watch the sun disappear beyond the horizon. It gave her a sense of humanity, reminding her that she might have a strong Quirk, but she was still human on the inside, she still held human emotions.

"There you are, little mouse."

Sora jumped in the air and landed with her hands ready for a fight. She saw a familiar looking figure sitting on the steps to the shack, slouched over his knees with his hands clasped in front of him. "Dabi?" She blinked.

"Sorry for the scare." He said, lazily. "You weren't back at the apartment. I figured you'd gone off with this Overhaul guy."

She let her hands fall to her sides and she walked up to the wood steps. "You couldn't tell by my voicemail that I was upset over it?"

"Yeah," Dabi shrugged his shoulders, not bothering to look up at her. "Doesn't mean you wouldn't have gone with him."

"Tomura is furious over it, too. Even if I wanted to join Overhaul, I don't think he would let me. Though the way Overhaul talked about this drug, it has me wondering."

"Sounds like he might just be using it as an excuse to get Tomura jealous. You don't think he really has a drug that can erase Quirks, do you?"

Sora tucked her hair behind her ears. "Either way, to think I might get answers about the drugs they gave me.... If he has those kinds of drugs, maybe they're the same ones."

"I would have been here sooner but... I had something to take care of." He mumbled, changing the subject, possibly to get her mind off of it.

"I thought you just got tired of me. You could have said something, you ass." Sora smacked his leg playfully.

He finally pulled his head up to look at her. He bore that same empty stare that he nearly always had, except she thought she might have seen something leave his eyes as he faced her. "Didn't want you in the middle of it. Turned out to be a dead end anyway, but it might've been more. If the police caught me, there was no way in hell they were going to find you."

"Awe, you do care about me." She teased.

"You and I aren't so different from each other."

Sora tilted her head a little and leaned against the railing, looking up at him. "Will you ever tell me your story?"

"When you need to know it." He said simply.

"You say we're alike." She pondered on that for a moment, thinking if all the ways they might be linked. It was enough for him to feel the need to keep her around. "You were an orphan, too?"

"Something like that." Dabi shrugged. "Enough guessing games. I can feel something big coming up and I need you to be prepared." He rose to his feet and jumped over the railing, landing perfectly on his feet. "That Quirk of yours is going to work eventually."

"How do you know?" Sora stepped back down into the sand. "I haven't been able to use it in weeks, you think it's just going to start now?"

"Do you trust me?" He faced her.

She paused, thinking over those words carefully. "You mean, do I trust a villain who won't even tell me where he goes every night?"

"Do you trust me as in the guy that protects you."

"Again, you're hardly around. If I'm attacked and you aren't there..."

"Answer the damn question."

"I want to trust you."

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aftokrvteira · 3 years

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break my heart (ch.2)

pairing: fem!eren x levi ackerman warnings: explicit smut, cliché, some other characters are genderbended too. word count: 19.1 k status: on going summary: Levi was sleeping soundly next to me and I couldn't help but smile. I got up carefully to go to the bathroom and almost tripped over Levi's pants that were still lying on the floor. I lifted them out of the way and heard something fall with a soft metallic sound. I put the pants on the bed and reached down, feeling the ground under the bed until I felt it and pulled it out. I couldn't see very well, so I took the small object with me to the bathroom. When I turned on the light, I could see it clearly in the palm of my hand.

It was a wedding ring.

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available on AO3

It was the fifth night that I went to the same bar and I was starting to feel pathetic and sad. There were no traces of her. It was as if she had vanished into thin air after leaving my apartment in the early morning. I would have thought it had been a figment of my imagination, but the message that she had written on my bathroom mirror showed how real it had been and what she thought of me:

FUCK YOU, YOU CHEATING FUCK

I would have called her crazy if she hadn't left my wedding ring in the sink along with the crime weapon: a red, broken lipstick without a lid. It didn't really surprised me that she drew conclusions when she found it, much more after our meeting. I couldn't blame her. I knew that was why she had escaped from my apartment as soon as she had a chance, but I really wanted to see her again so I could explain the situation to her.

I was not a cheater and never would be. That kind of life is pathetic and impractical to me, not to say that screwing someone else's feelings for an affair is something only a shitty person could do. The reason why she found my ring was because that night at the club, I had officially taken it off to symbolize that I had finally put a closure on my failed marriage. Erwin had taken me to the club precisely to celebrate my divorce - which he himself had carried out as my lawyer - and to help me clear my mind.

Honestly, I felt ridiculous. I no longer felt young enough to go to those places and seeing so many twenty-somethings made me feel outdated. I didn't recognized many songs and had seriously thought about leaving, especially when Erwin had suddenly disappeared. The last time I'd seen him, he was talking animatedly to a little blond woman who, at best, was about 21 years old. I would have liked to interrupt him to tell him I wanted to leave, but from one moment to the next he was gone, leaving me alone in that private room with nothing to do, see or drink. I waited for him for a long time, but when half an hour passed without hearing from him, I resolved that I would have one last drink before leaving.

It was at that moment that I saw her.

She looked uncomfortable, standing by the bar, as if she was hiding from someone and I assumed that was precisely what she was doing. Still, I couldn't help but notice that she was one of the most attractive women I'd ever seen. Her brown hair fell to the middle of her back, soft coppery waves that glinted in the lights of the dance floor. She was wearing an off-the-shoulder blue dress, which allowed me to see her collarbones and golden skin. What had convinced me to approach her were her eyes. Big and the color of the ocean, framed by thick lashes. It was hard to believe that I hadn't seen her before.

I sighed, drinking what was left on my glass and put the money on the counter before leaving.

Since that night I hadn't stopped cursing myself for not asking for her number or even knowing her full name. I hated the idea of her just assuming the worst of me, especially when she couldn't be more wrong. I wanted to wake up and see her, chat with her, and take her somewhere decent. I would have liked to see her, kiss her and feel her so much ... It was like being drugged with a feeling that everything was finally on its place, a feeling that I craved all my married life.

My phone vibrated in my pocket.

—What do you want, Erwin?

—Are you free tonight? —. Judging from the background noise, he seemed to be in some bar or restaurant —If so, why don't you drop by with us? It'll do you good, Levi, to take a little break from your endless search.

—Who is "we"? —I wasn't particularly excited about going out with him and who I imagined he was with. The truth is I did not feel with the tolerance necessary to bear Hanji.

—Are you coming or not, midget? —. Speaking of the devil, I heard the brunette's voice, shouting into the phone, over Erwin's voice. I sighed heavily, ready to decline the invitation, but thought better of it. Maybe I should take a break. Erin had left my life for a reason, hadn't she? This fact didn't make me happy, but I had to face it. It was practically impossible for me to see her again.

—I'm on my way.

***

As expected, they were almost all there. Hanji, Moblit, Mike and Nanaba. The only new face was sitting next to Erwin with a sheepish smirk on her freckled face and constantly clutching strands of blonde hair. I sat next to her.

—This is April —Erwin said, introducing her to me —She's my date tonight... maybe you remember her from the club?— Ah, yes. I remembered her, of course. I raised my eyebrows with some amazement and a little envy. April gave me a friendly smile and I just nodded, trying not to think about the fact that maybe at that moment Erin would have sat next to me if it wasn't for the unfortunate misunderstanding between us.

Fortunately, the conversations didn't involve much participation on my part, although I must admit that listening to Hanji's nonsense helped a lot to clear my mind, even for a little while. I constantly looked away from anywhere, until I was struck by the fact that April's cell phone screen began to light up constantly vibrating. She'd ignored the messages at first, but then began to respond quickly, trying not to look rude.

—Is everything okay? —I heard Erwin ask her in a low voice. She barely nodded, putting the phone aside.

—Yes —she answered with a sigh —. It's just the girls...They're asking me if I'm going to movie night with them —she explained and her screen lit up again. I didn't want to be a gossip, but she was literally sitting next to me. It wasn't difficult to hear them —. I thought they weren't going to do it. After all, Erin has been...

And as soon as he mentioned her name, the cell phone vibrated with an incoming call from Erin. Instinctively I became alert. Maybe it was a coincidence, nothing more. How many Erins could there be in the city? There were surely hundreds. After a few seconds, the photo of the aforementioned appeared on the screen and I almost had a heart attack.

There she was, smiling and squeezing April in a tight hug. It was only a fraction of a second until the blonde answered the call and got up to speak privately.

—You've got to be fucking kidding me— I murmured and leaned towards Erwin —. Hey ...—I caught his attention —. I think your girlfriend knows the girl I'm looking for —I whispered, but maybe I didn't do it low enough.

—Which girl?! —Hanji croaked, interrupting herself in mid-sentence. I shot her a venomous look but she was already immune to my temper. All eyes turned to me, interested —. Oh my God, do you mean that girl you told us about, Erwin?

—Congratulations, Levi! —Mike said to me and now my annoyance was focused on Erwin, who shrugged with a smile on his face. God damn it. I promised to myself that I would never tell him anything ever again.

—What kind of lame ass lawyer are you? Spreading confidential information with anyone...— I mumbled —. How much did you tell them?

—Most of it, actually— Hanji admitted —. He told us that it was an intense meeting between the two of you, but at midnight, poof! The spell was broken and your little Cinderella escaped.

—That's gross —I murmured —. I won't tell you anything again, you piece of shit —Erwin laughed and patted me on the arm. I rolled my eyes.

—Come on, Levi, they're our friends. I think they deserve to know the story —he said —. Why don't you ask April about her?

I couldn't just do that. Something that I had left out of the story was the part where Erin had written me a hate message on my bathroom mirror. If April was her friend, she most likely only knew shitty stuff about me and identified me as "the husband who was unfaithful to his wife" that her friend had slept with. I just nodded, and fortunately the conversation turned around, just as April returned to the table.

—I'm sorry, Erwin, but I think I'll have to leave early —she said to him, although she didn't seem very animated —. Mikasa wants us all to meet up at Erin's —he nodded and then looked at me. I didn't say anything, but it wasn't necessary, since the idiot opened his mouth for me.

—I'll take you where you tell me when we finish dinner, okay? —he answered and she took a seat, finally putting the cell phone in her bag —. By the way, April, Levi told me that he seems to recognize your friend Erin from somewhere.

The girl turned to see me, surprised. Her blue eyes scrutinized me completely, as if she was trying to recognize me. I cursed to myself and cleared my throat.

—I saw her picture when she called you. I didn't want to be nosy —I hastened to say—. I saw her face and it seemed somewhat familiar, but surely it's a coincidence.

April didn't say anything immediately, but seemed to be thinking her words.

—Really? —she asked —Hmm ... —she narrowed her eyes but then shrugged, as if drawing her own conclusions —. Oh well ... I can show you the photo more closely, if you want to confirm ...—she took her bag and pulled out her phone. I panicked but couldn't say anything. She tapped the screen a couple of times and she showed me the photo that I had seen and I was able to appreciate it more closely. Of course it was her. I would recognize those eyes anywhere — Is this her?

—Mh? — I blinked, distracted, but then I cleared my throat —Ah, uh ... Yes, I think it's her, but it doesn't matter, I didn't really talked to her that much...— then I remembered her lips, her moans and I felt a chill —. She just seemed familiar to me. Thanks, April —the blonde smiled at me and put her phone back on her bag.

—Have you been to Rose's?— I looked at her, a little confused —It's a big coffee shop on the main avenue — she continued —. Erin works there on weekends. Maybe you've seen her there —she commented and it was the best thing she could have told me. I had never set foot in that cafeteria but now I knew where to look for Erin. I knew my face had suddenly lit up because Hanji made a mocking comment about it, but I didn't care.

I could see Erin again.

#female eren jaeger #female eren yeager #snk fanfiction #aot fanfiction #riren fanfic #snk riren #levi x eren

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carlosgabrielruiz · 3 years

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PINKERTON - 33 1/3 Proposal Part 6

CHAPTER 4 Many Rivers to Cross:A Brief History of Rivers Cuomo

For most people, Weezer begins and ends with Rivers Cuomo. Period. Point blank. Rivers Cuomo is undoubtedly the brains and heart behind the band – without him, there would simply be no Weezer. Rivers is the primary songwriter, lyricist, band director, and de facto Great Leader (although it should be noted that in the early days he shared some of those songwriting duties and credits with Matt Sharp and original guitarist Jason Cropper).

Rivers was born in Manhattan on June 13, 1970. He grew up in upstate New York in the Buddhist Zen Center where his father was a farmer. In 1975, his father left the family and Rivers moved to Connecticut with his mother and brothers to live in Yogaville on an ashram farm.(1) He grew up as a quiet and shy child only later to become a metalhead with an outgoing love for Kiss and Van Halen.

When he turned 18 Rivers moved to L.A. and started to officially make a go of it in music. He got a job at Tower Records and was introduced to drummer Pat Wilson. (2) They became friends and formed a band called Fuzz. Rivers moved into Pat’s apartment which he shared with Matt Sharp, who was a talented multi-intrumentalist. Matt soon decided to join them and they embarked on an odyssey that would eventually make musical history.

Valentine’s Day of 1992 was a momentous occasion for the newly formed, yet still-unnamed, new band because that was the day that Rivers Cuomo (lead guitar), Matt Sharp (bass), Jason Cropper (guitar), and Pat Wilson (drums) first gathered together to rehearse and record their sessions. The band “got together at T.K. rehearsal studios, in West LA, and rehearsed for either 3 or 4 days straight.”(3) The demo tape that was made during the session featured a list of all the potential band names they were toying with at the time including the initial band name “Fuzz”, as well as “Meathead”, “Outhouse”, “Hummingbird”, “the Big Jones” and “This Niblet”.

Things moved quickly for the band from there. A little over a year after their first official rehearsal, the band - now officially named Weezer - signed a major label record deal with Geffen Records. The band had hoped to self-produce their debut, but the suits at Geffen were not going to let that happen. Eventually, the band picked Cars’ frontman, Ric Ocasek, to handle production on the record. According to Rivers Cuomo, “The record company was really pushing us to work with a producer, so we figured that if we had to have somebody in the studio with us, it might as well just be someone who writes good songs – and the Cars’ first record just rules.” (4)

The band went to Electric Ladyland studios in New York to work on their record. Everything was going great up until it wasn’t. There were internal problems with the guitarist Jason Cropper that led to Rivers firing him from the band. According to Ric Ocasek, “He (Rivers) called me when the record was finished, the day before we were supposed to start mixing, and said, ‘Listen, I just fired the guitar player.’ So I said, ‘What are you gonna do now?’ He’s like, ‘I want all of his parts off the record.’” Luerssen (2004)

With two days before mixing was due to begin in New York, Sharp and Cuomo called Brian Bell.5 He auditioned on tape and was hired to replace Jason. But it was too late to in the game to fly him out to re-record all of Jason’s guitar parts. Under the gun, and with only a day of studio time left before mixing was slated to begin, Rivers re-recorded all of the guitar parts himself (even though Brian is credited on the record).

The Blue Album was released on May 10th, 1994. The 10-track LP provided a “new roadmap for alt-rock following the death of Kurt Cobain and the conclusion of grunge’s first era.”(5) The catchy power-pop record with hook-laden choruses and kitschy Spike Jonze directed videos was an overwhelming success. It would invade the mainstream and go on to sell over 3 million records in the U.S. alone. The band went on a seemingly never-ending tour to promote the record.

Rivers struggled with the newly found fame and success that the Blue Album had brought the band. He was “frustrated by the limitations of rock and the lifestyle of touring around on a bus and playing the same songs over and over.” Cohen (2015). So he did what most people in his position would do, he put the band on a hiatus and enrolled in Harvard to study classical music.

But before the semester started, Rivers decided to fix his right leg, which was two inches shorter than his left leg. The surgery on his right leg left him in agonizing pain. It would be a long recovery. During his first year at Harvard Rivers’ right leg was encased in a metal frame that would require him to adjust and tighten the screws daily in order to elongate the bone.(6) He became hooked on painkillers and opioids while trying to manage the pain.

As he told The New York Times. “I grew a long beard and walked around with a cane… The only time I could write songs was when my frozen dinner was in the microwave.” Rockland (2006) “Where I was emotionally … I went to a more serious and dark place.” Runtagh (2019).

Alone and in pain, Rivers was listening to a lot of classical music and he kept coming back to the opera Madame Butterfly by Puccini. “One of my favorite operas by him was Madama Butterfly, specifically when the role was played by Maria Callas,” he recalled to Pitchfork. “On tour, I would listen to her every night after the show and be so moved by the depth of emotion and sadness and tragedy. It really was calling to me, like, “Come on, Rivers. You can go there. You can go much further with your music than ‘The Sweater Song’ or ‘Buddy Holly’.” Cohen (2015)

His deeply personal and emotional lyrics were raw, to say the least. He opened himself up to a level of honesty, anger, pain, and emotional truth that was only hinted at within the Blue Album’s casual, ironic detachment. But make no mistake, that anger and honestly was always there just below the surface, only it was wrapped around a bouncy hook with a singalong chorus.

With a dozen or more new songs ready to record, Weezer decided to head to the studio. Only this time, they would self produce the new record themselves. They wanted a feel that was similar to their live shows that would better capture the power and energy of their new songs. The resulting record was a “grittier, slightly darker sound that was more Pixies than the polished power-pop Ric Ocasek had helped the band realize on the Blue Album.” (7)

A few months before the album was slated for release, Rivers Cuomo “issued a precarious warning to the band’s fan club about his mental state during the writing process:” Braun (2016).

There are some lyrics on the album that you might think are mean or sexist. I will feel genuinely bad if anyone feels hurt by my lyrics but I really wanted these songs to be an exploration of my ‘dark side’ – all the parts of myself that I was either afraid or embarrassed to think about before. So there’s some pretty nasty stuff on there.

You may be more willing to forgive the lyrics if you see them as passing low points in a larger story. And this album really is a story: the story of the last two years of my life. And as you’re probably well aware, these have been two very weird years.

But the worst was yet to come... TO BE CONTINUED IN THE 33 1/3 BOOK PINKERTON

1 - Weezerpedia. Rivers Cuomo. https://www.weezerpedia.com/wiki/Rivers_Cuomo.

2 - Cohen, Ian. (2015, February 9). Rivers Cuomo. Pitchfork. https://pitchfork.com/features/5-10-15-20/9590-rivers-cuomo/.

3 - The Weezer Recording History. (2006, February). Weezer.com. http://www.weezer.com/info/recording/WeezRecHist3.htm.

4 - Luerssen, John D. (2004, August 1). River’s Edge: The Weezer Story. Toronto. ECW Press.

5 - Runtagh, Jordan. (2019, May 10). Weezer’s Blue Album: 10 Things You Didn’t Know. Rolling Stone. https://www.rollingstone.com/music/music-features/weezer-blue- album-rivers-cuomo-things-you-didnt-know-822881/.

6 - Rockland, Kate. (2006, February 16). At School with Rivers Cuomo: Student with a Past. The New York Times. https://www.nytimes.com/2006/02/16/garden/16weezer.html.

7 - Braun, Laura Marie. (2016, September 23). How Weezer’s ‘Pinkerton’ Went from Embarassing to Essential. Rolling Stone. https://www.rollingstone.com/music/music- features/how-weezers-pinkerton-went-from-embarrassing-to-essential-105567/.

#music #writing #weezer #pinkerton #bloomsburypublishing #333sound #rockandroll #anniversary #pitch #books #rivers cuomo

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opiomancy · 3 years

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cumulonimbus ix

Pairings: Draco Malfoy x Harry Potter, Sirius Black x Remus Lupin, Hermione Granger x Ron Weasley

Summary: When asked about how Harry's life got turned upside down he's going to blame a Farrah Fawcett poster, a second magical diary, and Draco Malfoy in that order.

Word Count: 1873

[Part One: Mid Day] Part Two: July 2nd, 1998: Early Morning

It’s well past midnight and Harry is still loitering in Sirius’ old bedroom; the dinner Kreacher placed on the nightstand has been left cold and untouched. Instead of eating like a normal functioning adult, Harry decided to stare at the ceiling. The face of Farrah Fawcett and her red swimsuit still beaming down at him as dusk fell into night. He’s not quite sure why he’s just sitting here… staring at the pearly white smile of the blonde bombshell above him. Maybe if he stares long enough he’ll find some divine intervention on what the hell he’s supposed to be doing. It’s only been a few months since the battle of Hogwarts, and Harry feels as if he’s running out of time. He always feels like he’s running out of time. As if he’s late for something important, or there's a deadline that’s just a few days away, but for once in Harry's life he doesn’t. He has absolutely nothing to do.

“Except clean this bloody house” he says to two dimensional Farah, as if she’ll respond to his complaints. Harry groans, running his calloused hands over his sticky face, dried sweat clogging his pores. The result of hours of grueling labor stains him. It’s something he should be used to by now but isn’t, and probably never will. After staring at the American actress some more he’s come to the conclusion that he’s completely mad. It’s the only explanation really. Why else would he decide cleaning up this mansion, alone, was a good idea? Why did he think breaking up with Ginny was a good idea? Why did he think that when the moonlight hit Farrah’s hair in just the right way it reminded him of...

Yep. Definitely madness. A one way ticket to the Janus Thickey ward if it pleases the court. Harry flipped over on the bed to bury his face in the dusty satin pillow, anything to not stare at the Hollywood starlet again. When Harry thought about it, it makes sense that madness would take him in the end. You don’t survive the killing curse twice without it screwing something up inside. He could see The Daily Prophet headline now: “THE CHOSEN CRAZY ONE!”

No, Rita would definitely come up with something more clever. “THE BOY WHO WENT OFF HIS ROCKER: THE TELLING TALE OF HARRY POTTER’S QUICK DESCENT TO INSANITY!” That sounds better, more Rita.

Harry supposes he’s had a good run of it all. Nearly eighteen years old, a war hero, wealthy beyond his needs, half a virgin. It’s been a life. Better to be done in by an army of dust bunnies and outdated aristocratic decor than Voldemort. At least now it’s quiet, he can let his mind slowly slip away into the unknown without the stress of his friends and loved ones getting hurt. Maybe he should eat the dinner Kreacher left, at least it’ll be something else to do.

Harry accios his wand that fell to the floor at some point in the evening and heats up his kidney pie. He eats it slowly, trying to forgive its mushy texture and cold bits. He’s never been that good at cooking spells. Harry begins to take inventory of the room as he eats. Sirius’ style in decor was much better than the rest of his family, especially considering it was decades out of fashion. One solid wooden king size sleigh bed that Harry was currently sitting on, with Gryffindor red sheets gently stretched across it. A bookshelf to his left filled to the brim with old Hogwarts textbooks and muggle literature with the covers removed. A large wooden nightstand to his right with a few girlie magazines stuffed inside the drawer, something Harry refused to touch in fear of them being much more solid than magazines ought to be. In front of him was a window that was charmed to display a dense forest at all times, with large thick black curtains that shrouded the room in darkness when closed. On the other side of the room laid a desk with an antique stationary set resting on top, and a yellow record player beside it. The walls were covered with pictures and posters like the marvelous Miss. Fawcett, splattered around with no rhyme or reason, and shelves to display a fantastic classic rock record collection. It looked like a muggle teenage boy’s room, and that’s just how Sirius liked it.

Every part of this room screamed Sirius Orion Black, and that just made Harry miss him that much more. He wished his godfather was here to help him renovate the house, but he knew that would never happen. One thing Harry knew for sure was that he was going to keep this room exactly as it was, a time capsule of Sirius’ youth. Deep down he knew that his godfather would appreciate it, even if he’d never admit it if he was here.

Harry sighed as he placed the half eaten kidney pie on the nightstand, too exhausted to finish it. He laid back down to stare at Farrah some more, he understood why she was so popular in her day. Her smile was bright and beautiful, and people tend to like bright and beautiful things. Harry didn’t see a lot of that in his life, and now he can say he finally has. A bright and beautiful... poster. Yes, undeniably mad.

Harry slammed his fist on the wall behind him with a groan. Stupid Farrah, stupid Hermione, stupid Sirius. He could be doing so much with his life but he’s just sitting here! Harry got up and began to pace around the room. Shouldn’t he be thinking about his future? Shouldn’t he begin thinking about a career? Dating? Getting a life? And why does all of that sound so much more monumental than fighting a facist overlord? He wants to do nothing, but needs to do something. The contradictions of his life were wearing on his psyche and he just... needs. He has this major need deep within himself and he doesn’t know what to do with it all.

Harry could feel his magic begin to overwhelm him, a feeling he hasn’t had since he was eleven and could barely control his magic. Before he knew it books were flying off the shelves and Farrah had fallen off her post. When Harry opened his eyes to see the mess he created he slumped with exhaustion.

“Great more bloody mess” Harry said to himself. He began to levitate the books to their rightful place, making sure they weren’t out of order. He noticed Farrah was lying limply against the wall as if she was as tired as Harry was. Madness . When he went to pick her up Harry saw a loose floorboard at his feet.

“Think there’s something underneath it Farrah?” as per usual, Farrah didn’t respond. Harry levitated her back to the ceiling where she belonged with a sticking charm, and went to work on the floorboard. The corner of the dark wood lifted up at the edge, and squeaked when Harry put pressure on it. After some finagling the board finally gave way. Inside was a large cigar box, an old crown royal bag, and small metal tin. Harry decided to check out the tin first, he blew off the dust and pried the rusty hinges apart. Inside were a pack of matches from a place called The Beaver Dam and some joints. Harry went to smell one of them and it nearly disintegrated in his hands.

“Better off. ‘ Mione would kill me anyway,” he thought to himself. He could almost hear her commanding voice now: “Do you know what drugs could do to your brain Harry? It can affect your memory, your lungs, your libido! Marijuana just makes you okay with being bored and that’s not good for your mental health either!” A walking D.A.R.E program that one. Harry could remember back in sixth year when she caught a couple of Hufflepuffs hotboxing the greenhouse. Hermione went on and on about how it could damage school property, or damage their bodies, or worse get them expelled. Harry himself was too obsessed with watching Malfoy’s name on The Marauder’s Map to listen to her speech. His mates gave him endless flack for it, but he turned out to be right in the end.10 points to Gryffindor.

Harry opened up the crown royal bag next. Inside was an array of seemingly meaningless knick knacks: a mood ring, an old coke bottle cap, an empty carton of clove cigarettes, and a plain brown tie. Harry was curious about why Sirius decided to put in the effort to hide this pile of junk. It all seemed harmless enough, but knowing Sirius each item probably had their unique own story to tell; the sentimental oaf.

The cigar box was the last item hidden away under the floorboard. The box itself wasn’t that magnificent, it was a faded yellow wood with the King Edward Tobacco logo imprinted on the top with the royal crest repeatedly stamped along the borders. When Harry opened the box his stomach plummeted to the floor. Inside this innocuous box was an old leather diary, reminiscent of the one that made his life hell in second year. Harry immediately shut the box and tossed it across the room, begging his heart to stop hammering in his chest.

“It’s just a diary. Not every diary is a trojan horse attempting to kill you. Sirius would never keep a cursed item in his bedroom. Just breathe.” Harry repeated to himself. He found himself staring at Farrah once again, breathing slowly as his heart rate returned to normal. Her once brilliant smile appeared to be mocking him, panicking over a silly little diary, such a childish thing to do. Harry steeled himself once again, he wasn’t going to let some dusty book get the best of him. He defeated the darkest wizard of the century at seventeen. Dust bunnies were one thing, but a dumb diary? Harry refused to be bested by this nonsense. He stood up from his fetal position on the floor, puffed up his chest, and stalked towards the worn tobacco box.

“Nothing to worry about, just an old diary” Harry said as he opened up the box, pretending that his hands weren’t shaking as he did. As he held the well loved leather diary in his hands, Harry questioned whether or not he should open it. This could easily be Sirius’ diary, and that would be a major invasion of privacy. Downright disrespectful. What kind of godson would he be if he just nosied his way through all of Sirius’ belongings? Nothing cowardly about respecting boundaries.

“Scared Potter?”

Harry flinched as a certain blonde haired git’s voice buzzed in his head. He was not scared. He could read this diary if he chose to. No problem with it all. In fact he was going to sit down and read the entirety of this diary… tomorrow.

Harry hastily placed the diary on the nightstand and fled out of the bedroom towards his own. He was in desperate need of sleep if he was hearing that voice in his head.

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daleisgreat · 3 years

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Speed

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Today’s entry will mark the first official 4K home video release I am writing about. I already own a few other 4K UHDs, and a couple of months ago, I watched my first 4K video at home with 2001’s The Fast and the Furious. However, I already covered that movie’s BluRay release here several years ago, so I will not be dedicating another entry for it, other than to say that the 4K upgrade pops and makes it look like a new release. Today’s entry is for 1994’s Speed (trailer). Before diving into this movie, I noticed one of the tracks from this film’s score repeatedly used throughout sounds awfully like one of the main themes I primarily associated with the Metal Gear Solid franchise. I have no idea if this was pointed out before, and I just overlooked it all these years, or maybe I am grasping at straws. Click or press here to take a listen and decide for yourself. 1994 was a hell of a year for Hollywood movies primarily transpiring from a highway with The Chase, Speed, and the OJ Simpson Bronco chase….oh wait (although I highly recommend the ESPN 30 for 30 on it, simply titled: June 17th 1994). The majority of Speed has a straightforward premise: serial bomber and local madman Howard Payne (Dennis Hopper) planted a bomb on a bus rigged to explode once the bus drops below 55 miles per hour. Police officer Jack Traven (Keanu Reeves) is alerted to this by the bomber himself to exact revenge on Traven after successfully rescuing hostages from an elevator Payne armed at the beginning of the film.

From there, for the middle hour of this nearly two-hour film, the action almost entirely takes place on the bus. Traven makes a grand entrance onto the bus by commandeering a Jaguar and having its owner (Glenn Plummer) take the wheel so Traven could heroically leap onto the bus and save the day. It would not be that easy of a rescue mission as Payne has eyes on the bus, and Traven has to play by his rules and get him his $3 million ransom to disarm the bus. Without question, the middle hour on the bus is the best part of the film. The opening half-hour is an excellent appetizer with the elevator hostage crisis that Traven and his partner, Harry (Jeff Daniels), successfully foil. However, once the action shifts to the bus is when Speed takes off. Shortly after taking control of the bus, one of the passengers freaks and inadvertently shoots the bus driver, and a fellow passenger, Annie (Sandra Bullock), takes over the wheel. Throughout the film, Annie and Traven have wonderful chemistry, and I could not help but root for the duo throughout. Every couple of minutes, there is a new potential conflict to overcome to keep the bus going over 55mph. The film wisely peppers in brief dialog exchanges to let the movie breathe just enough before the next hurdle makes itself present.

The film's standout moment is the major obstacle for the bus to overcome when it encounters a stretch of unavoidable highway under construction and missing a hearty chunk of the road. Traven’s solution is that since that stretch of a road is on an incline, they may clear that gap if they build up enough speed! That epic stunt hits all the right notes, and I got goosebumps all over again re-watching it, and odds are, I bet you did too if you have seen this movie. If you have not, then watch this scene and see for yourself by click or pressing here. A lot of the critical discussion in the aftermath of this movie was if that jump was realistically possible. The best thing I can do is to compare it to another film, Road Trip, which is likely a better indicator of what could happen when attempting such a feat. Once the middle bus portion of the film is over, there are still about 20 minutes left where Traven tracks and chases down Payne in a subway station. The movie felt over once the bus portion had such a satisfying conclusion that it almost feels wrong to keep sticking with the film by this point, but I recommend you do since there is a satisfying payoff in the form of Payne’s demise. I have to share a story now when I first saw this film at around 13 or 14 on VHS. My dad’s VCR had what seemed to me at the time was a revolutionary feature where if I kept pressing the pause button repeatedly, it would slowly, frame-by-frame, play the film in super slow-motion. At that age, I thought this was a fantastic way to get the most out of the biggest stunts in action scenes. My favorite moment exploiting this feature was seeing Traven and Payne wrestle around on the top of a subway train until Payne was not watching his field of vision, and a warning light lead to his sudden beheading. I slow-motion replayed that sequence countless times in my awkward, early teenage years. Suffice it to say, Hopper plays the out-of-his-mind bomber perfectly, going so far as to make sure he receives his appropriate cinematic comeuppance.

The director ensures the many passengers on the bus maximized their minutes to the point I where it feels like you are right there with them!

Two audio commentaries are the only extra features of the 4K disc in this 4K/BluRay combo pack. One is with the director, Jan de Bont, and the other is with producer Mark Gordon and writer Graham Yost. Props are to whoever decided to subtitle the commentary tracks. I very much appreciate it! I first started to bounce back and forth between the two commentary tracks, but Bont was way too relaxed and had too many pauses to hold my attention, and I finished up with his track within five minutes. However, Yost and Gordon are very much engaged from beginning to end and have fun cracking jokes and sharing memories throughout. Some quick takeaways I got from them were how they wanted to film a major scene outside of a sports arena, dealing with critics poking holes at how unrealistic their stunts were, and how watching the movie felt very different at the time of the commentary recording just two months after 9/11. The BluRay disc contains the remainder of the bonus features. Inside Speed is a four-part feature lasting just under an hour breaking down the visual effects, stunts, and location sequences, but half of it also contains an HBO First Look special hosted by Dennis Hopper that hits all the right kinds of cheesy mid-90s EPK nostalgia that it is worth checking out. Aside from 12 minutes of extended scenes and a Billy Idol music video that seems totally off base with the tempo of the film, there are a couple of Action Sequences mini-features breaking down some of the stunts. I highly recommend watching the one dissecting how they did the bus jump, as it shows raw footage of what really happened when they shot it, and showed footage of some of the specific safety measures they instilled to make that stunt as safe as possible and had some eye-opening interviews with the stunt driver before and after.

After watching that old VHS copy nearly a dozen times, Speed wound up being one of my favorite action films I got burnt out early on and never bothered upgrading to a DVD or standalone BluRay. Watching it again in 4K all these years later breathed new life into it for me. I am not an expert at breaking down video quality by any means, but watching the 4K disc on my 4KTV gave the impression of this having far more current production values. The editors somehow managed to remove all the old film grain defects for a smooth 4K upgrade. If you have not seen Speed yet, then it has everything you could want out of a mid-90s action movie with explosions, gripping thrills and stunts, dramatic rescues, plenty of zinger one-liners…..and a Billy Idol theme song. Pardon me while I attempt my best Dennis Hopper impression here, “Pop quiz, hotshot, which 1994 blockbuster that takes place primarily on a bus is a perfect candidate for beer and popcorn movie night at home?” Other Random Backlog Movie Blogs 3 12 Angry Men (1957) 12 Rounds 3: Lockdown 21 Jump Street The Accountant Angry Video Game Nerd: The Movie Atari: Game Over The Avengers: Age of Ultron The Avengers: Endgame The Avengers: Infinity War Batman: The Dark Knight Rises Batman: The Killing Joke Batman: Mask of the Phantasm Batman V Superman: Dawn of Justice Bounty Hunters Cabin in the Woods Captain America: Civil War Captain America: The First Avenger Captain America: The Winter Soldier Christmas Eve The Clapper Clash of the Titans (1981) Clint Eastwood 11-pack Special The Condemned 2 Countdown Creed I & II Deck the Halls Detroit Rock City Die Hard Dirty Work Dredd The Eliminators The Equalizer Faster Fast and Furious I-VIII Field of Dreams Fight Club The Fighter For Love of the Game Good Will Hunting Gravity Grunt: The Wrestling Movie Guardians of the Galaxy Guardians of the Galaxy Vol 2 Hell Comes to Frogtown Hercules: Reborn Hitman I Like to Hurt People Indiana Jones 1-4 Inglourious Basterds Ink The Interrogation Interstellar Jay and Silent Bob Reboot Jobs Joy Ride 1-3 Justice League (2017 Whedon Cut) Last Action Hero Major League Mallrats Man of Steel Man on the Moon Man vs Snake Marine 3-6 Merry Friggin Christmas Metallica: Some Kind of Monster Mortal Kombat Mortal Kombat Legends: Scorpions Revenge National Treasure National Treasure: Book of Secrets Nintendo Quest Not for Resale Old Joy Payback (Director’s Cut) Pulp Fiction The Punisher (1989) The Ref The Replacements Reservoir Dogs Rocky I-VIII Running Films Part 1 Running Films Part 2 San Andreas ScoobyDoo Wrestlemania Mystery Scott Pilgrim vs the World The Secret Life of Walter Mitty Shoot em Up Slacker Skyscraper Small Town Santa Steve Jobs Source Code Star Trek I-XIII Sully Take Me Home Tonight TMNT Trauma Center The Tooth Fairy 1 & 2 UHF Veronica Mars Vision Quest The War Wild The Wizard Wonder Woman The Wrestler (2008) X-Men: Apocalypse X-Men: Days of Future Past

#random movie #speed #keanu reeves #Sandra Bullock #jeff daniels #dennis hopper #glenn plummer #jan de bont

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mechmech · 3 years

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Ok so I know this is like my first post but I’ve been working on it cause a friend did it for their dnd character and I was like this could be fun and give people some insight. Questions wandered as Mecha 1-100

Smell like: oil, sweat, and more recently baby spit-up

Voice: Not many people will understand this fem-V from cyberpunk. Sorta gravely

Motivator: Research mostly. Finding out new things and applying them. More recently though her kid and making a better world for them.

Most embarrassing memory: She doesn’t like to share this story, but when she was younger and moved around with her sister mecha, she was afraid to GO in the woods because she accidentally wandered onto a farmer’s land and was caught pantsless.

How do they react to pain: “ You wanna hit me go ahead, just stay away from the hands and eyes” She can deal with a great deal of physical pain but when it comes to emotions and others she is like a mage named Corren

Wear: Normally throughout the day, she wears her metal armor. Outside of her armor, she wears a simple black dress when relaxing, a work apron while working, and always Always gauntlets and a blindfold

Most positive relationship: THis is difficult because so many of them have done different things, but most probably Corren and her want to be more good like him

The weirdest thing I have ever eaten: Correns cooking

Sleep: “Alister! Corren! Cuddle me!” Yea she will cuddle up with almost any person who trusts and it depends on the person. Alister: Alister is the big spoon and mecha buries herself into his chest and stomach. Corren: Mecha is like a koala to Corren and just hugs onto a single leg.

Favorite food/ kinda food: Vegetables honestly, but also baked goods like bread

Most insecure about: How others see her

Like to wear: adaptable clothing, something that can be used for many different functions and also gotta be able to get dirty and clean when you need it

How do they react to feelings of guilt: Previously they bottled them up, but more and more they are learning to talk to others about that guilt. Ultimately she always feels guilty for something

React to betrayal: Depends on the person buuuttttt, angry, blames themself for part of it, tries to move on quickly

Greatest achievement: MOCHA

Too little sleep: quiet and most likely taking a nap in the skeleton’s arms. That's If she is actually tired. Shel heals fatigue in an instant.

What are they like a drunk: If she drinks and gets drunk and that's a big if she becomes an I love you drunk and we'll just tell everyone what she likes about them before passing out.

Music likes: A lot of Rock and techno music, a little bit of pop only because it fits.

Right or left-handed: She always works with her hammer in her right hand.

Fears: Being completely alone, losing her friends, losing Mocha, destroying the world, the unknown, diseases, being like her mother

Favorite weather: Nice sunny days with a slight breeze

Favorite color: it’s hard because it's between gold and blue

Collect anything: besides random trophies, rocks that she sometimes gives away.

Hot or cold weather: Hot because you can cool down easily.

Eye color: Goldenish/ yellow

Race/ ethnicity: Well Gremlin in Sekrezia, in the real world through it's between Brazilian and Irish

Hair color: Ginger/ red

Happy where they are currently: Nope, not even a little bit. She's upset because she believes she has possibly doomed the world and has actually found someone she can connect with/ has some feeling for and they just keep backsliding her. She also hates that she has to leave her new daughter.

Mounting person: YES!!! Up early to get shit done

Sunrise or sunset: Sunrise is extremely pretty to watch especially when you can but caves are a thing.

Messy or organized: Like myself, it's a chaotic form of organization

Pet peeves: Jumping to conclusions, mistreating machines

Objects of significant importance: Her forge hammer which is like a badge of office saying she is a member of a smithing guild and her evil eye because a really good friend helped her make it.

Least favorite food: The rock she accidentally tried to eat while she was tired delirious one night in a cave.

Least favorite color: Kelly Green. Look it looks like puke, nothing against other greens but this one ugh

Least favorite smell: Decaying flesh

The last time they cried: mhhh a few weeks but it's gonna be soon. Definitely the birth of her child.

Anybody with them: entire party forMochas birth, but other than that Corren and Alistar

The time they got injured: Well getting crushed by a giant cube was bad, the worst injury would probably be getting dragged into lava by her own creation that she loved.

Scars: Nope none so far that are physical. Some mental ones that she's working through.

Mental health issues: Paranoia, Depression, Suicidal thoughts, low self-esteem, PTSD

Bad habits: Shutting everyone else out.

Why might someone dislike her: SHe can be a bit standoffish and definitely hard-headed.

Why might someone love her: He has a big heart for those she cares about, she's smart and also creates a lot of small gifts that aren't for value but personal reasons.

Believe in ghosts: Literally was in a plane of the dead, soooo yes

Anyone they would trust with their life: Corren, Alistar, Torvid, Simple,

Romantically interested in anyone: Spectra, depends on the person. ACE and Demiromantic

Dating/ Married: Complicated is what it is. Yes dating somewhat but it’s not a good relationship

Like surprises: Yes, surprises are nice and add a bit of fun to life. Other than a somewhat surprising pregnancy.

Birthday: I honestly forget but it's their weave day

Celebrate their birthday: Only with those they care about, which is few but some members of the party yes.

Family: Dad is dead, Mom is alive supposedly but she was supposed to be dead, and sister is possibly dead but in a bit of denial about it

Close to their family: Chosen family yes.

MBTI type: ISTP

Zodiac signs: I forget the sekrezian one but in real life Aquarius

Hogwarts house: Ravenclaw

Alignment; Chaotic neutral/ good

Nightmares: Losing the entire party in ways that they caused ore were directly a part of.

View on death: CHanged a lot as their questline has gone on but “Once someone has passed from this world and seen the raven queen and chosen their afterlife that is it, they are at peace and will stay there unless the gods dictate differently. Past a resurrection people should not come back. I have learned this the hard way and watched what happens when you play with death”.

Something they always laugh at: Corren getting flustered and digging himself into holes he can't get out of.

When bored, what do they do: Read a book/ tinker with new experiments

Enjoy the outside: yes, especially new areas where there are unexplored places.

Accent: Somewhat of a german accent but I’m no good at replicating it

Upon seeing a slice of chocolate cake, the first reaction: “Who left this perfectly good piece of cake here?”

If they knew they were going to die what would they do/ say: Alister: Be a good father to Mocha, Corren: Be a good stepfather to Mocha and make sure Alister stays on the right path, Simple Geoff: didn't like you at first but your apart of my family now, Maple: Live your best life and don't let other people tell you what you can be also given up on revenge it's never as sweet as you think, Lautrec: (Opens box) sorry it took a while, Vlog: “you don't like me, I kinda like you, protect your own but never stop learning and exploring.

Feelings about sex: Mecha doesn’t want sex and feels really uncomfortable with it especially around people she doesn’t know, but around friends, she’s willing to talk about it but will also respect preferences.

Sexuality: questioning, but Grey-ace

Squeamish around blood: Nope “ I saved a man that had a lethal arrow through his neck”

Anything they find gross: Living hair/ hair constructs

TV trope: Reclusive nerd with a big heart

Enjoy helping people: Yes she really likes to help those who need it, but if she believes you can help yourself she will leave you to it.

Allergies: Seasonal/ pollen

Pet: Multiple constructs that range from a skeleton to a walking piece of glass

Quick to anger: No, she has somewhat of a calm head that eventually boils over and then causes a big yelling fight/ random actions such as throwing a stick of dynamite in a graveyard.

How patient is she: Rather patient especially when listening, not the greatest responder though

Good at cooking: Hell yea they are, give them a pan and they'll make you a feast

Favorite insult:” I'm coming for your knees” “Don't make me get the fume engine”

How do they act when happy: Huge grin on their face and they start fidgeting.

What do they do when they learn about others’ fears: Tease them slightly in private but keep the information to themselves.

Trustworthy: yes and very loyal to her friends.

Do they try to hide their emotions: Definitely but not always the greatest at hiding them cause everyone has a great sense of motive.

Exercise regularly: We walk and adventure every day while she carries probably over 25lb of mechanical items so yes.

Comfortable with the way they look: Mhh sometimes, but not always. She really doesn't like that she reminds herself of her sister or that she has distinct eyes.

Features they find attractive on others: Not really features, she's more into personality but she does like people’s eyes.

Personalities they find attractive: Protective, Kind, Smart, honest, loyal.

Do they like sweet foods: definitely into the sweeter things in life,

Age: in sekrezia: 204, equivalent age is like 45-55

Tall or short: 3ft pretty short but and on the shorter side of her race

Glasses or contacts: Nope just a cool ass blindfold and no it's not for BDSM

Consider herself attractive: Nope, not at all. SHes surprised if someone likes her in that way.

Sense of humor: Both dark and sexual but at the same time dad jokes as much as possible. Also random improv she comes up with on the spot, which is slightly me

What mood are they in most often: THe mood of trying to figure out how something works

What angers them: Hurting children, hurting the party, destroying art and machines, using others to your own gain, rape, slavery

Outlook on life: “Life is full of twists and turns. There is never bad without good. Take your time and really think about what you do, but don't forget to also just let go and go wild every now and then.

What makes them sad or depressed: THinking of their family/ friends being gone, children with no home, Mocha growing up alone.

Greatest weakness: Turning the mind against them/ lack of belief in herself and that she is not responsible for the world.

Greatest strength: Open mind and somewhat open heart.

Something they regret: not letting them self grieve for pax in a different way than hunting them down and screwing the world.

Biggest accomplishment: Having a kid

Hope for the future: open an orphanage and continue helping the Fucks make the world at least a little brighter.

#rpg #dnd #personal #source: scatterpatter

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doyouever-daydream · 4 years

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A heart I can miss.

A/N Hello! So this is a soulmate AU I came up with, I actually started writing it two months ago (!!!) I think it would’ve turned out better if I hadn’t waited this long to finish it, but whatever, hopefully you’ll enjoy it.

This idea came to me while listening to Strangers by the JoBros but in the middle of writing it, I listened Do You Know Me? by John Mayer, and let me tell you both songs scream soulmate AU.

Pairing: Penelope Garcia x Luke Alvez

Warnings: I came up with my own soulmate prompt, I need to warn y’all about that.

Wordcount: 2603

Masterlist

“It’s just the strangest thing, I’ve seen your face somewhere, an early evening dream, a past life love affair”

“Ay, mamita, I love you but seriously drop it” A twenty-three year old Luke said to his mom while he helped her moving the couch for what it seemed the tenth time.

“Nada, you’re gonna listen to what I have to say and you know why?” She looked at him sternly while removing her reading glasses “Porque soy tu madre”

Both of them spoke at the same time “Because you’re my mom” Luke sighed while rolling his eyes, the way his mom insisted on the subject didn’t make him mad like it used to when he was teenager, after many years listening to her, he found it amusing.

“That’s right! And you gotta listen to me so you know how does it feel when you meet your soulmate” She poked him in the ribs and sat on the couch, signaling for him to sit beside her “Mijito, it’s important that you know this, I want you to be happy”

“I can be happy with someone who is not my soulmate” He shrugged, not really into the whole soulmate fairytale his grandma, aunts and mom used to talk about.

“¡Ay no! Being with your soulmate is the only way you can assure you’ll be happy and not end up divorced like your prima Isabel, she didn’t marry her soulmate”

“Mom, I don’t even know if I want to get married” His mom glared at him with the eyes only a Latina mom would give you when you dared to say such thing “I’m only twenty three, I’m a baby”

“You know when your dad was your age-” Luke interrupted her mom before she went down that road.

“Oh, no, we’re not gonna start about that again, when is he getting home anyway?”

“In a couple hours, before you go you need to listen to me, please” She pleaded with big eyes and Luke being such a momma’s boy couldn’t deny her giving him the soulmate talk again.

He threw his head back on the couch and stared at the ceiling “Ok, mom, tell me what’s gonna happen when I find my soulmate”

She smiled knowing she had won “You’re gonna have a moment of realization, that’s the most important thing...” He cut her off for the second time, another thing Latina moms didn’t like.

“Wow, yup, I’ll totally know when that happens” He smirked and her mom hit his shoulder with the hand fan she was holding.

“You’ll know, it’s a feeling that you don’t experience twice, it’s almost as if the world stops for a moment” She remembered how it was when she had met Victor, Luke’s dad.

“Ok, so moment of realization, that’s it, we’re done talking about this”

“No! There’s something else, when the time to meet your soulmate gets close you’ll start having dreams about the times where you’ve met before” Luke furrowed his brow thinking his mom was starting to lose it “You know, in other lives”

“You’ve never said that before, you’re making it up, you don’t even believe in reincarnation”

“Hush, I’m talking, when your mom is talking you shouldn’t talk” He rolled his eyes “You won’t see their face in your dreams but the first time they even walk right past you, you’ll have a feeling of familiarity” Luke was now confused, this detail in particular was new information to him, he never knew where he stood in all the soulmate subject but he had been a witness of happy marriages and happy relationships when they claimed their significant other was their soulmate, opposite to others marriages and relationships that after a time of happiness, turned into messy and complicated situations, that’s why his whole family, ever since his great great great grandmother, insisted on people looking out for their soulmates.

“Am I supposed to feel this feeling of familiarity at the same time I have the moment of big realization?” Luke wondered while turning to see his mom who was now smiling at him.

“Not always, but you’ll know, hijo, you’ll know” She patted him on the shoulder and prayed that his son would find his soulmate, all she ever wanted was her children to be in a happy marriage as she had been for the past 27 years.

“In all my reverie, I thought I felt us there, a feather in my hand, a flower in your hair”

Luke smiled at the text message from his mom “Have you found your soulmate in DC yet?” He shoved the phone into his jean’s pocket and made a mental note to call her later, knowing she would be disappointed when he gave him an update on his non existent love life.

He was now starting a new job at the Behavioral Analysis Unit, and though he was still traveling quite often, he needed to buy more things for his apartment that was fairly empty from when he was in the Fugitive Task Force.

He was roaming through the store that was fairly crowded, needing to buy more sheets and pillows, as he walked by the candles section, someone brushed past him, not really bumping into him or anything, but his left arm had brushed against the stranger’s left one, and he felt something he couldn’t quite describe in his entire body.

It was like a tingling sensation that went from the tip of his head to his toes, he turned to see who that person was and the only thing he saw, among the many people there, was blonde hair and a flower placed in it.

He brushed it off, it was nothing, he was distracted with his own thoughts and this women had walked by him, it was no big deal. No big deal at all. He thought as he placed his hand on the same spot he had felt her arm and the same tingling sensation invaded his body, it couldn’t be true, all that mystic crap his mom had said wasn’t true. He was a grown man, he didn’t believe in that, even if for one moment during his childhood he did, now he was certain soulmates didn’t exist. What about the dreams, a voice inside his head, that resembled a lot his mom’s, reminded him of some dreams he’d been having the last month.

They made little to no sense and he never seemed to remind them exactly as he had dreamed them, but one thing he knew for sure, except he didn’t want to admit, in all of those dreams a women was there, he could never see her face, but he reminded her hair, on most dreams her hair was blonde, but in others she had bright red hair, once or twice he remembers her with black hair and bob hairstyle.

He reprimanded himself for daydreaming about something that was not real, and continued to get the stuff he needed, paid for them and headed home to who, he joked was his true soulmate: Roxy, his dog.

It was his first day at the BAU and he was not in the best mood, he had barely gotten any sleep the night before, the nonsense dreams kept waking him up during the night, and making him feel antsy, all the way to Quantico all he could think about was about his dreams, he was so frustrated by the fact that every time he was about to see the mystery woman’s face, he would wake up or the scenario would switch to something different and he would never get to see her face, at first he ignored the fact that those dreams sounded a lot like the ones his family talked about, then he was intrigued by them but now he was annoyed that they were messing with his head. Once he arrived he saw he was barely making it on time, he ran towards the elevator when he saw the doors closing.

“Wait, please!”

A blonde woman, who was looking at her phone, snapped her head up and tried to hold the doors but it was too late, she felt bad for the person but returned to her cellphone, it was a text from the guy she had a date with the night before, he seemed nice, funny, caring but he wasn’t her soulmate.

She sighed and threw her head back, even after all those years she still hoped to find her soulmate, a couple weeks ago she came to the conclusion it was time to give up, she needed to date other people even if there was not a moment of realization when they first met.

And just then the dreams started, and even though she was still set on meeting new people and giving it a try, she wondered if it would happen, if she would finally meet her soulmate, Penelope tried to keep her expectations low, she knew people that had the dreams but it never happened, she even knew about a some people that had the dreams but it didn’t happen until a few years later when the universe put them in the same city again, so she tried to remain hopeful but not too hopeful.

As the elevator doors opened, Hotch was waiting for her to inform her that they were needed at some meeting, the meeting turned into several meetings that had them out of the BAU for the entirety of the day, JJ had texted her that there was a new guy and that they weren’t sure if he was going to stick around but just a heads up that she was going to see a new face at the conference room the next morning, Hotch noticed her jaw clench and roll her eyes, and remembered to ask her about her date, thinking maybe that could be the reason for her reaction.

“So, Penelope, how was your date?” She turned to Aaron, and shot him a small smile.

“It went good, he’s really nice” He could see there was something else but just when he was about to ask more, she spoke up again “Do you believe in soulmates?” The question caught him off guard.

He cleared his throat “I-I do” Penelope waited for him to say something else but he remained quiet.

“Was Haley your soulmate?” She felt comfortable enough to ask him.

“No, I-I wished her to be but she wasn’t, but I loved her” Penelope offered a tight lipped smile and looked again to the metal doors in front of them, not knowing how to continue the conversation “I’ve met her, my soulmate” Penelope snapped her head at Hotch. “So you’re with her then?” Hotch scratched his neck, besides David, he hadn’t shared that story with anyone else.

“No, it’s complicated, I think when we realized it, we were both too scared and just tried to ignore it and fight against it and now when I was done fighting it, she… went away” Penelope stood there with a confused look, during all of her life she believed once you met your soulmate everything went by easily, but apparently that wasn’t always the case.

They reached the parking lot, both thankful to be going home after the day they just had “Good night, Hotch, see you tomorrow” Hotch nodded and they both parted ways.

On her drive home, Penelope passed the store she had been the other day, that day she had felt something that made her believe her soulmate was at the same place, but after roaming around the store for a few she gave up.

The next morning when she arrived, she immediately noticed there were more cars than usual in the parking lot, she believed that the bureau was still receiving some important visits from other government offices, she could only hope, they weren’t going to call her and Hotch again, she wanted to be in her lair without talking to other people that weren’t her friends, just then she remembered she would meet the new guy and her stomach turned, not in a good way, just the thought of him being Derek’s replacement brought tears to her eyes.

She got to the elevator just in time before the doors closed, eight people were there, but that was the second thing she notices, the first thing was the tingling sensation running through her body, she felt almost as if she couldn’t move, Penelope thought that maybe it was because of how crowded it was, the elevator stopped and two people got off on the second floor, but the sensation got stronger with each second that passed, and she dared to think that maybe it was because something was about to happen.

“Time stands still and it’s only us, what we feel started way before we ever touched, just imagine only us, yeah you found me right before I’d given up”

Luke who was standing on the far left from her, was feeling the exact same thing, he felt numb and unable to even shift on his feet, he tried taking deep breaths, was it because he was nervous about working at the BAU? He couldn’t find an explanation for what he was feeling.

He looked around the people that were there and that’s when he saw it: blonde hair and a flower, the exact same one he had seen at the store, he breathed out, it was impossible, the doors opened and more people got out, allowing him to see her better, he felt dizzy, but was still adamant to believe that it was happening.

Penelope swallowed, she felt a burning sensation in the back of her neck, so she turned around trying to see what or who was causing it.

That’s when Luke just knew, he didn’t know how to put into words what he was feeling, but it was what his mom had told him his entire life: a moment of realization.

Penelope felt like she couldn’t breathe, yet it didn’t care, her entire body was being filled with a sensation that she could only describe as fireworks going through her body, both of them completely forgot about the others standing with them nor did they noticed when the remaining of them got out a couple floors before theirs, leaving them alone.

Without intending to, Luke took a couple steps towards Penelope, she remained on the same spot, with wide eyes that he thought glowed so beautifully, it was like he wasn’t in control of his action because the next thing he did was placing a hand on the side of her face.

The dreams flashed through their minds, but this time, they could see the faces of the mystery people that invaded them, Luke could see Penelope with every hairstyle while Penelope focused on the fact that each time, the one thing that never changed in her dreams was his smile.

She let out a breath she didn’t know she was holding, and leaned into his touch, her vision was blurry and she shut her eyes close, wanting to cherish the moment.

“It’s you, it really is you” Luke whispered.

Neither of them knew what the future held but one thing was certain: nothing would ever be the same, they had found each other and they knew in their hearts it was just the right time.

“I just saw the lightning strike, knew it right then when I looked in your eyes, and I said to myself ‘it’s not surprise we ain’t strangers’, must be from a different life, been here before and it just feels right”

#garvez #penelope garcia #luke alvez #criminal minds #luke x penelope #garcia x alvez #garvez imagine #garvez fanfic #criminal minds imagine #garvez soulmate au

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eyesfixedonthesun22 · 5 years

Text

Swallowed Pride

Summary: You and Natasha Romanoff go way back. Pairing: Natasha Romanoff x Female Reader Warning(s): Smut 18+, Cheating, Lying, Secret relationship, Bisexual reader Word Count: 1,577 Notes: This is my first fic with all female smut. Definitely a work in progress. Cheating is bad, I don’t condone it. This song just always had that sort of tone and mood for me when I listened to it. Sorry Laur (@fvckingavengers) for this being like uber uber late. Your challenge said no deadlines and I legit just didn’t even put a note on my document of when I started this. It got lost in the shuffle. Please ignore the poorly translated Russian. Любимая моя= my love, не останавливайся = don’t stop Prompt: “The lies that tied your tongue in knots – Are the words that grew to hit my spots – So filthy, dialed desire – Swallowed pride but spit out fire – Liars turn me on” (Bounce - The Cab) Moodboard Image Credit: Photo credit for the moodboard goes in the following order left to right. All photos acquired from Unsplash. Maëliss Demaison, Aleksander Borzenets, Nihal Demirci , Leonardo Sanches, Richard Brutyo

St. Petersburg:

The first time it happens is in a shitty flat on the south bank of the Moyka River. The two of you had run there; stilettos clicking on the night washed cobblestones. You smirk remembering the chorus of screams and sirens behind the redhead and her accomplice. The next morning the papers would describe a silent assassination at the St. Petersburg's Mariinsky ballet; so perfectly coordinated it shocked the world. The two of you would have already left the country before ink hits paper.

In the dingy flat, she hushed your brazen giggles. Back then you always got drunk off a job well done, before honest work had slapped some humbleness and morals into you. You’d always gotten drunk as well. She preferred vodka while you guzzled bourbon. The honey sweet burn of the alcohol and then high of bloodshed fueling you.

The safehouse apartment had a crap bed and worse heat. That’s what you tell yourself now. More catalysts pushing you to an inevitable conclusion; out of your hands.

The two of you slipped off jewels, emeralds for you and rubies for her. The fine silk dresses now thrown unceremoniously across a chair in the corner; only panties and brassieres left separating skin. Such delicate little things. Watching Natasha disrobe set you aflame. Each click of her gun’s safeties seemed to ramp you closer to danger. You loved watching the dangerous woman disarming herself. A one woman militia. She did it with meticulous precision, the blood red nail polish clicking on cold metal weapons.

“Come to bed, Любимая моя. We have an early morning.”

You never went to sleep that night. Years later it was easier to blame the drinking or the cold, but it was a lie. It was more accurate to blame on the milky curve of her collar bone or the way she wears a knife strapped to her ankle… even to bed.

You remember the cold steel pressing into your vulnerable skin as you came; rutting against her ginger curls, cursing some Russian she taught you with your shoulder length opera gloves still on.

Berlin:

Over the course of the next few years the two of you fucking became part of the friendship. Some missions finished in girl talk; drinking wine and painting your nails a similar shade as the vintage. Others finished with you acting as wingwomen for each other in some crowded nightclub in whatever seedy corner of the world your work had taken you to. She’d smirk at you knowingly while you took a cab one direction and she did the same in another. But always, you’d bounce back to one another.

You loved her.

You remember Berlin, after nearly a year apart, the longest spanse of time between seeing her. She’d been different. Marked. Mentally and physically. You press your fingers deeper into flesh, tracing long memorized but deeply missed softness and feel the raised skin over her left hip bone. You knew how she got it. It was one of so many scars she’d acquired without you there to watch her back.

“Not soft all over anymore.” Her vulnerable eyes found yours in the dark before you thumb gentle circles on her clit. She sets her jaw; ever so stubborn and refuses to close her eyes.

“Still feels soft to me.”

Instead of words she responds by slipping two deadly fingers into your wet heat, pushing and pressing at the spots that make you keen.

That night you’d fallen asleep to her tracing all yours scars, gentle opera played in the background.

You loved her.

New York:

You loved your boyfriend (in a way).

Nearly a decade later the two of you had gone straight, joining up with the Avengers. It took her months to convince you to leave your old life behind. You wouldn’t have done it for anyone but her.

You remember telling her, “Honest work doesn’t suit me.”

The boyfriend knew about your line of work… vaguely. He knew you traveled a lot (for business). He knew if he asked you questions about your work besides what you’d already labeled as “safe” it’d start a fight. He thought you lived together. After dating a year, he’d presented you with a shiny freshly cut silver key. What he didn’t know was you’d kept your loft across town; the one two blocks down the street from Nat’s.

You can't bring yourself to feel horrible. A life of deceit and mistrust had warped you like a book left in the rain; only the most trained of eyes capable of deciphering it.

“Honesty doesn’t suit me,” you mutter to yourself.

The relationship wasn’t worthless. With him, for the first time in a long time, you had a place to come home to that didn’t feel like a glorified suitcase. He helped you learn to survive on more than takeout and boxed mac n’ cheese. You actually enjoyed cooking when your hips pressed against his at the cutting board. You felt like honest work felt a little less like work when you were trying to go on the straight and narrow for him.

You saw Natasha less since he’d come into your life. She was an anchor back into that old life even if she’d been the one to pull you into the present. You wondered if she had any new scars. You wondered if she still kept her favorite knife on her ankle as she undressed for bed. You wonder what your boyfriend would say if he knew you kept your favorite pistol under the mattress and at least one perfectly sharp blade in the bedside table.

Old habits die hard.

**************************************************************************************************

The warm glow of candlelight makes his eyes sparkle. It’s your anniversary and he’s twitching and flushed. You’re focusing on taking the next bite of your steak wellington; ignoring it’s turned to sawdust in your mouth and no amount of unseemly gulps of wine can push it past the welling lump in your throat.

“Darling! Любимая моя!” a familiar voice calls across the restaurant.

There she is; all silk and black leather accented with a flash of her flame red hair. She exchanges pleasantries with him.

You stand awkwardly only able to mutter a pathetic, “Bathroom.”

You brace your hands on the cool tile of the sink. Your two worlds were never supposed to collide. The room is twirling, and you can’t catch your breath. You search for an exit; perhaps some window when the door opens.

“There’s no exit.” She stares at you like a cat who’s caught a mouse. “Closest exit is out the kitchen to the alley. You should know that, Любимая моя.”

“Why are you here, Nat?”

“A better question could be why is he about to propose to someone with the last name Miller.”

“Fuck.” The curse is almost silent, muttered into the back of your hand your rage swirls fast and burning below the surface.

“He doesn’t know your last name! He doesn’t know what you do! What we do!” The double meaning doesn’t fail to hit home. “Were you ever going to tell him, or just let to poor bastard propose to a stranger?”

“Why are you here!?” you challenge her again.

“The lies that tied your tongue in knots – Are the words that grew to hit my spot. It burned away at me. I can’t let you live this secret fucked up lie. We gave that up when we joined the Avengers.”

“No. You did.”

You click the lock closed before pouncing on her. It’s so filthy; dialed desire pent up after how long of trying to fake a normal life.

“Let me taste you, Natalia. I’ve missed you.”

She sinks her teeth into your neck; already devouring your feeble attempt at domination. The black widow was in charge. She pushes you back onto the sink, yanking your dress up around your middle. Her manicured nails don’t bother to take your panties off, opting to rip them to the side before her soft mouth is on your core.

“не останавливайся! You pant and writhe as she forces your legs further apart. She drinks you down like vodka.

With your release sparkling on her lips and chin, the two of you run through the kitchen and out the backdoor.

**************************************************************************************************

“You don’t need him,” she says cool and calm between drags off her cigarette.

You’ve spent the past ten minutes toying with the cardboard box containing the rest of them. It’s some Russian brand with red and yellow packaging. The heady tobacco smoke mixes with telltale musk soaked into the black cotton sheets in Natasha’s bedroom.

“Why are we here, Nat?”

“Liars turn me on.”

She still manages to hold the smoldering stick while you chase her across the bed and dive once more into her fiery curls; soaked and creamy from her last release.

That’s how the night continues.

She doesn’t dress. Neither do you. The two of you keep your skin out in the open, on show for one another. It’s a constantly tussle of bodies in motion fighting to give pleasure because otherwise you have to stop and fight to deliver pain onto one another. Swallowed pride only to spit out fire. It’s as if each lie the two of you have told over the years for one another fuels you both; turns you on.

After her last shuddering release, muscles stretching like a tawny cat, she asks you, “Let’s go to the opera tomorrow?”

#natasha romanoff #natasha romanov #Natasha x reader #Natasha x female reader #Natasha x you #my writing #my fics

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aliceslantern · 4 years

Text

Retribution, a Kingdom Hearts fanfic, chapter 6

Newly a person again, Ienzo is weighed down by guilt and his humanity. He's prepared to do whatever it takes to atone... only to find unexpected solace in a familiar face. With more insight into the bonds between people than ever before, Ienzo reaches for a dangerous element from the past to help Kairi and Riku in their search for Sora. What is his life if it means saving another, brighter light?

Chapter summary: Ienzo grows closer to Demyx, but that closeness quickly becomes a confounding variable.

Read it on FF.net/on AO3

---

He tried to let himself grow . He spent those few hours in the lab, with Even and Ansem and Kairi. Dutifully, he continued to feed himself and sleep the requisite eight hours. He practiced normal black magic, unrelated to his power. Occasionally, considering they were now “friends,” he spent time with Demyx.

Ienzo wasn’t sure if he were simply unused to casual conversation, or if Demyx were truly eccentric. He did have quite a lot of amusing stories about his customers, as well as Scrooge, who was by all accounts quite the character. So slowly, Ienzo began to stop seeing their relationship as it used to be, and began seeing it as it was. After all, Demyx was one of the only people he knew roughly his age.

They walked, got lunch and endless cups of coffee. Ienzo found himself… looking forward to it, whenever Demyx asked him to meet up, rather than dreading those texts. A handful of times he accompanied Demyx on deliveries, and found to his surprise that he was indeed competent at his job. Scrooge tried to rope Ienzo into porting as well, in his own jovial, oddly-accented way, and he had to evade out of the conversation quickly.

But beneath these pieces… something else began to emerge, something Ienzo initially confused for companionship, or kinship. A warmth, a start of the heart. He no longer minded when Demyx touched him casually in conversation--a hand on the shoulder, a playful punch, a “hey come on” take of the hand when going somewhere. The touch… evoked something in him, vague and weirdly insidious.

Ienzo began to notice things.

The subtle way his hair blended, brown to blonde, the way he seemed to be so slowly growing it into something different. The precise color green his eyes turned when light hit them just right. How easily he moved through space, how comfortable he was in his own body. The way his lips moved when he spoke, the rhythm of his speech.

Why was it Ienzo was focusing on these things? What did it mean?

On the verge of sleep, weighed down by one of his pills, it came to him.

Oh. Oh no.

In his brief hours in the lab he was distracted, terrified. He thought he’d understood this as a Nobody, but it was clear he’d had no idea.

His humanity was waking up. So were… other things.

Demyx had mentioned a desire for a partner of some sort. Unlikely at the time he’d meant Ienzo. Ienzo had written all of that off as too difficult to compute. He figured he may be asexual and was fine with that. He’d no need for anything physical. Messy. Complicated.

He… was not asexual.

Ienzo began to feel something almost like a pull, between them. A desire for that innocent touch, a squeeze of the hand. Was it possible he felt this way because, again, Demyx was the only person he knew his age? It seemed natural that, with the awakening of these feelings, he’d latch onto whoever was closest.

It made him feel pathetic, and not quite in control of himself, not that he changed his outward interactions. If emotions were difficult to reign, hormones were completely impossible. He started having vague dreams of longing--arguably worse than the nightmares--and woke up frustrated in a wholly new way. Difficult, and embarrassing, to be finishing puberty at this age. He said nothing about it to anyone. Those few times he woke to find stains on his sheets and clothing, he took care of it and pretended nothing happened.

Why did this have to be happening now ? Of all the confounding variables?

Ienzo needed to ride out this attraction until its inevitable end. To even entertain the idea of anything more substantial than quickly-quashed daydreams was insane. So, sweetly he asked Even if, considering he’s feeling so much better , he may add a few more hours to his day, and thank you so much for the medicine . Ego stroked and paternity soothed, Even agreed. With his remaining hours, he began so tentatively to work on his power.

He could still manipulate the lexicon with relative ease, so that had been gained. Finding the illusion was going to be so much harder. He spent hours trying to recall how that felt, to create things where there was nothing, then trying to draw simple objects from memory. And they were drawings, barely-perceptible flickerings in the air, but the exertion still made him gasp for breath. Though it was progress. At least Ienzo had something to tell Kairi and Riku when he saw them face to face, or over the phone. At least he could give them hope.

But Demyx wasn’t that easy to brush off. “Zo, are you ignoring me?” he asked. His tone was joking, but Ienzo felt vaguely caught. (And vaguely angry that “Zo” was growing on him.)

“I’ve been taking a few more hours since I’ve been doing better,” he said.

“You’re not… pushing it too hard, are you?” he asked.

“I’m trying not to.” And he was; with magic use, he needed to be doubly careful how he treated his body.

Was it the light, or did he blush? “I miss our hangouts.”

Just the right thing to trip Ienzo up, to make his heart flutter-- it’s merely hormones, control yourself. “As do I.”

“I mean, I know this is like, important, big-picture stuff. But…” He hesitated. “Do you… have time, later? Just to talk?”

The sensible thing to do would be to nicely brush him off. “Maybe a few moments,” he said instead. How strange, to be at odds with his mind. A first.

He smiled. It was a wide, uncontained grin, one that changed his face, made it seem softer. “The greenhouse?”

Ienzo nodded once. “I’ll see you then.”

Only once he had returned to scouring data did he realize that getting both of them together in an enclosed, private space was one of the stupider moves he could’ve made. Demyx had blushed. Demyx had smiled. Was it possible that this… whatever it was… was mutual? Or was Demyx also merely feeling the backlog of hormonal impulses blunted by Nobody biology?

(And did it matter? Would it be so terrible to explore these feelings?)

(Yes, it would. Should it go south--the likely conclusion--they still lived together. He didn’t need more tension in his life.)

Ienzo should’ve made up an excuse that night and stayed in. He didn’t. He was so unused to managing impulses that he simply didn’t . Or at least, that’s what he told himself.

The summer evening was cool, and he could hear the soft chirp of crickets. The air felt nice on his skin, freed at last from that infernal white coat and ascot at the throat. There was already a warm light emanating from the greenhouse, meaning Demyx was already there.

Not too late to turn back.

He took a deep breath. Took two.

The music he heard was soft, meandering, inviting. He’d never really listened to Demyx before when he played sitar, stubbornly tuning it out. Ienzo realized he was rather good , technically and aurally; it sounded light, effortless, the notes graceful and leaping like water. The boy’s power made sense, now. It all flowed.

Demyx wasn’t a scientist, but he was a student in his own ways. Ienzo felt the blood rush to his face. His hands trembled. His own internal protests were quickly waning. He opened the door. “Are you early, or am I late?”

Demyx looked up. The melody didn’t quite cease. “Believe it or not, I can actually be on time.”

“...Sorry about that.”

“I wanted to work on this anyway.”

Ienzo sat on one of the cushions. The space smelled vaguely like incense, a heady but oddly clean scent. “That’s something of your own creation?”

“Yessir.”

“I suppose you were always… composing, creating. Is it very much different, now that you’ve a heart?”

Demyx snorted. “It’s harder.”

Ienzo cocked his head. “Really?”

“It’s easy to… approximate emotion,” he said, with a wave of his hand. “You know, this sounds like love, or anger, or whatever. To really feel those things, and then, say, to try and work on something with a completely different theme, is like wading through concrete.”

Hearing him speak so technically made Ienzo’s blush worsen. He wanted to reach out and take one of his hands. He gripped his ankle in an attempt to stop himself. “Have you been at this long?”

Demyx chuckled. “At least five years. Probably before that, I would guess, but… there’s nothing.” His expression changed, became wistful.

“Still? After all this time?”

He let the sitar vanish. The silence was particularly notable. “Yeah. I…” A laugh. “I had Even look at me. Neurologically, I think it’s called? There’s nothing… physical about the memory loss. So it must’ve been… whatever brought me here, from the past.”

“Forgive me… I quite forgot that’s the truth of your life.” Even had told him as such, scowlingly, in disbelief.

Demyx shrugged. “You’ve got a lot on your mind. Sometimes I forget.”

“Do you want your memories?”

He leaned back on his hands. “I go back and forth,” he said. “On the one hand, not knowing about the trauma that’s, uh, for sure there is awesome. On the other… it’s like… who am I really, you know?”

“I remember everything, and I feel much the same,” Ienzo said softly.

His smile was sad now. He reached into a crate and pulled out two bottles.

“Beer?”

“Nah. I hate beer. Cider. It’s sweet. Want it?”

Ienzo doubted one drink would kill him. “...Why not.”

He popped the top for him. “Ha. That’s the spirit. I mean. You are legal.”

He scoffed a little. The drink was fizzy, sweet and also metallic. It was a taste of summer, he thought. “I’m sure it doesn’t surprise you this is my first real drink.”

“Really?”

“...I was too young. Then, I never wanted to… cloud my mind.” Ienzo sighed. “I wouldn’t mind taking the edge off things.”

Demyx laughed a little. “Hate to break it to you, but I only have the two and I doubt you’ll get turnt off that.”

“...You’re probably right.”

“Maybe you and me could go to the bar some time. Try it out.”

He looked into the mouth of the brown bottle. “Not sure nightlife is for me.”

“You never know until you try something.”

“I… suppose I should never say never.” After all, he’d never thought he’d like sitting here with Demyx, their knees almost touching. “Maybe. Yes, that might be nice.”

For a few moments they finished their drinks in silence. He definitely wasn’t drunk, or even tipsy, but he did feel a little warm. The lantern cast softened the room, almost pinkish. Perhaps it was the memories of calm here, perhaps it was the ambiance or simply not being alone, but Ienzo found himself… relaxing. The sudden lack of tension in his muscles felt strange. “I remember why I used to love this place. It’s very calming.”

“On a good day you can see the stars,” Demyx said. “Look. Here.” He reached over and snuffed out the lantern. “Lay back.”

The cushions were odd, lumpy. It wasn’t totally dark; there was enough moonlight for the silhouettes to be clear. Ienzo looked up through the crystal ceiling. “Been a while since I looked up,” he said.

“Yeah.”

“The feeling of insignificance. But it’s surprisingly reassuring.”

“You think?”

“Well, the world is bigger than just us, don’t you think?”

“I do,” he said softly.

Ienzo could feel Demyx looking at him. A nervousness, a fizz, spread throughout his body, completely different than anxiety. Arguably, the opposite of it. He should fight this. Should get up and leave right now. Instead, he shifted, just slightly, onto his side so they were locking eyes. With a shaking hand, Demyx touched his cheek, a touch that made him shiver.

“...I…” Demyx’s voice cracked. “Have you also been… feeling this?”

So it was mutual. Oh. Oh, no. He tried to keep it together. He had to fight this. Didn’t want to. “Yes,” he admitted.

“Oh,” he said, very softly, with the same sort of fear Ienzo felt.

“I know.”

“I tried to stop.” He almost sounded as though he might cry.

“Me too.”

“What do we--do?”

“Well…” That touch did feel so nice. “As I see it… there are two options. We both walk out of here and forget this ever happened.”

“Or?”

He took a trembling breath. “We see it through.”

“What do you want?”

“I think…” He was trembling all over. “I think I would like to stop thinking.”

There was a moment when they both very clearly knew what was about to happen, but did nothing. Demyx inched closer to him, so they were almost touching; Ienzo could smell him again, the salt and ginger. He rested his hand on Demyx’s waist, and feeling the warmth of him under clothing was purely too much.

They both met in the middle, awkward, not quite meeting one another’s lips the first time. Ienzo shifted up a little and tried again. Demyx’s lips were so soft against his own. It became clear very quickly that neither of them had done this before; they weren’t sure what to do. For some reason Ienzo figured Demyx had some experience. After a moment they pulled apart.

“I suppose,” he began softly, still reeling more from the fact that he’d kissed more than the kiss itself, “It’s rather obvious I’ve never done this.”

He laughed a little. “I don’t think I have either--if I did, I don’t remember.”

“A learning curve, then.” He’d figured it’d have been natural, instant. He thought of the feel of Demyx’s lips. “Let’s try again.”

“Okay.”

It took a moment or so of fumbling and discomfort before they seemed to get it. This was more what Ienzo thought it would feel like, a fragile give and take. It was all so gentle . They were both shaking. He hadn’t realized how exhausting fighting this attraction had been. Giving into it made him feel more awake than he had in days.

He wanted to go further. Couldn’t. Already a dangerous frazzle of overstimulation was breaking over him. He wasn’t used to platonic touch, much less this; he was overloading his own wires.

“I like this. I do,” Ienzo said. He felt his eyes watering, an anxiety of too much too much threatening his tenuous moment of joy. “But I’m so… it’s so much. I have to…” He sat up and pulled away, shivering as if he were cold.

“Are you okay?”

“I’m afraid as a human… I get very overwhelmed by stimuli,” he forced out. “I used to as a child.”

“Oh,” he said softly. “Can I… how can I help?”

“I need space. Calm, quiet.”

“Should I go?”

He considered. Despite it all… the last thing he wanted to be was alone. “No, stay.”

#retribution #ienzo #demyx #zemyx

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mobius-prime · 4 years

Text

225. Sonic the Hedgehog #157

(Unnamed Story)

Writer: Ken Penders Pencils: Ron Lim Colors: Jason Jensen

"Unnamed Story? But Nala," I can hear you say, "surely there's been a mistake! They wouldn't have just neglected entirely to put the name of the story in! You must have missed it somewhere!" Well, I reply, I didn't miss a thing! Yes, for whatever reason, somehow this story ended up nameless. It's not a case of the story's title only appearing halfway through the issue - this initial bit is definitely a separate story from the one that comes after it, with a separate credits box and everything. I suppose it's nothing more than a minor error though, so we might as well get into it.

Shadow is still on the hunt for the meaning of life - ain't we all, buddy - and has tracked down his next location of interest, namely… Prison Island. Yeah - I'm just as surprised as you - it's not blown up at all, apparently still totally intact. Just another case of why they shouldn't have left out the adaption of Sonic Adventure 2 if you ask me - there're clearly so many differences between how it went down in the game vs. the comics, and yet none of it is ever properly addressed. Shadow makes his way into the complex, punching a giant hole through the wall to gain entry when he doesn't immediately find a nearby door (yeah, sounds about right), but is brought up short by the unexpected sound of voices ahead.

I mean… again, wouldn't you have already gone over all of this during the events of SA2? You know, the game where the final chapter is literally all about exactly this? *sigh* There are just so many details missing here, that Shadow's entire character arc ultimately fails to make any real sense. Half the stuff he should already know given his lack of amnesia, and important details are missing all over the place. Anyway, as you can see Metal Sonic is there apparently listening to the broadcast of Gerald's execution, and leaps forward to attack Shadow when he sees him. Shadow randomly finds a hand-cannon-type weapon nearby, and briefly considers using it to end the fight early before deciding that fighting hand to hand is more fun, tossing it aside and leaping into the fray. Metal Sonic explains that it's yet another new model, rebuilt after the last one was destroyed by Shadow - and it's been upgraded to be smarter too, something it demonstrates quite well by freezing Shadow's shoes in some convenient liquid nitrogen from a pipe nearby followed by blasting him with the very same hand cannon he discarded a moment ago. The resulting explosion is massive and knocks the both of them clean out. Great job, Shadow!

Well hello again, M! I'm sure you're not up to anything nefarious with your two new hedgehog ragdolls…

System Shutdown

Writer: Ken Penders Pencils: Ron Lim Colors: Jason Jensen

Poor Eggman just can't catch a break lately. The ordinary stress of being human has already been getting to him, and what's more, now he has to deal with being woken up abruptly by a blaring alarm sounding all throughout his base, causing him to groggily drag his feet through the hallways trying to tell it to stop. He finds himself waking up a bit more, however, when he reaches his main scheming room only to find a threat printed on the monitor, warning him that at exactly midnight tomorrow he'll be undergoing the title of this story! How suspicious… Eggman gets A.D.A.M. to silence the alarms and begins going over the possible suspects with his creation, trying to figure out who might be trying to kill him this time. Meanwhile, in Knothole, Sonic is engaged in a much softer and more contemplative activity.

Aww, poor Sonic. He and Sally have been so distant lately, and he's not the type to really show his emotions outwardly, at least not the negative ones. It's obvious he's been hurting a lot lately, and it seems that he's found some comfort in practicing his guitar skills alone at night. Eggman and A.D.A.M. continue to discuss their predicament through the night, but ultimately can't come to any conclusion about who the threat might be coming from, so Eggman decides to make a daring and bold move - namely, taking an egg pod straight to Knothole to show up in person! It's so shocking to everyone that when he emerges from the pod in plain view of the populace, no one even steps forward to confront him. Tails wants to, and argues that the fact that he's here is reason enough to attack, but Rotor warns him back, telling him that since Eggman hasn't made any threatening moves yet they'll treat him the same as any other guest for now, something Tails isn't at all on board with. And frankly, Rotor, I'm with Tails! Are you crazy? This is a global dictator, a terrorist, a mass murderer, someone who runs goddamn slave labor camps for those who oppose him! You'd think they'd jump at the chance to capture the very being who's caused them so much grief! Obviously, Sonic himself is ready to rumble, and tries to rush out the door of his house as soon as he sees the pod floating overhead, but his mother, unaware of the commotion, forces him to sit down to breakfast as he frantically tries to explain. He gives up on arguing and shoves pancakes down his throat at light speed, runs to the door… and finds Eggman staring straight down at him on the threshold. Naturally, he's not cool with this surprise at all, and immediately leaps in to attack. However, Eggman moves surprisingly quickly for someone his age, dodging Sonic's moves and even flinging him aside with ease. Sonic quickly realizes this can't be the real Eggman after all, but some kind of new toy that merely looks like him, and manages to smash something internally that breaks the illusion.

Sonic and his parents all basically give Eggman the "are you freaking kidding me" stare, and he explains that since he has no idea who's threatening him, and the only other consistent threat to his rule over the years has been Sonic, he's hoping to pit Sonic against his new enemy to save his own skin. Sonic is less than enthused about being used this way, but Eggman insinuates that he might be able to find a way to deroboticize Jules if Sonic agrees to help, and ultimately that's something Sonic can't ignore. And so, he and Rotor find themselves flying back to New Megaopolis in the egg pod, with Rotor's intentions mostly being to investigate this threat and see if it's something they need to be worried about. When they arrive, we finally get our first hint at who exactly might be behind this. Remember Anonymous? It was only mentioned the one time, when whoever it was mysteriously managed to reroboticize the Fearsome Foursome and others when even Eggman himself couldn't figure it out. Eggman tries to explain this to the others, but before he can even get the first few words out a loud stomping from down another corridor distracts them. Sonic and Rotor immediately assume they've been betrayed, but Eggman nervously swears up and down that he too has no idea what's happening. Suddenly the door smashes open to reveal M, who seems downright hostile to her "father," even slapping Rotor out of the way to get to him. Sonic tries to fight her, dodging her laser vision, but she knocks both him and Rotor out, leaving her to threaten Eggman in peace. It seems that somehow, her systems have been compromised, and now she's here to punish him for his "crimes against the Kingdom of Acorn…" with the help of an army of Metal Sonics!

How fascinating. After all, clearly the kingdom didn't send these after him… so where the hell is all this coming from? Who is Anonymous, anyway?

#nala reads archie sonic preboot #archie sonic #archie sonic preboot #sonic the hedgehog #sth 157 #writer: ken penders #pencils: ron lim #colors: jason jensen

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writingsofmyimagination · 5 years

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Conjecture |6|

Yoongi x Reader

Idol Reader Au, Enemies to Lovers AU

Summary: Your management refused to renew your contract unless you collaborated, so you ending up working with Min Yoongi. A guy you’d disliked from before both of your debuts. There is more to their past than meets the eye.

Words:2325

Warnings: SMUT (Oral, Orgasm denial, ruined orgasms.) Domme/Sub themes, Sub!Yoongi. Some Sass!

Links to other parts in my masterlist

if you want to be tagged let me know :)

Here it is guys as promised :)

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//She came to me! To me! Yoongi thought, feeling the bed lightly depress next to him. His mind was a drowsy haze, it was too deep to climb out of but his face muscles managed to creep into a small docile smile as he turned and held her like a lost bear finally found.

“Hey” Yoongi heard her say in a gentle tone. “Sleepy head” she said with a little more strength.

Even when she’d just woke up she was the epitome of beauty.

“We need to get to the studio by 10” she warned, by twisting over and glancing at the clock he saw he had little under half an hour to get ready. Looking up at a flawless face, content eyes all beneath messy hair. He wanted to drag her back in with him to be consumed by the warmth of each other; he wanted to feel her weight on him grow heavy as she drifted off to sleep in his arms. Instead he nodded with dozy movements and watched as she placed a mug of coffee beside him and left him with an awakening view of the bottom curve of her behind underneath a long t-shirt.//

You arrived at the studio just minutes early. The studio techs wore small scowls as they powered up the equipment for you both, their distaste only pulled an amused smirk onto your face.

“Thanks, guys, we really won’t need any assistance today if you have some other work to be doing” You offered the pair. They shared a ‘Thank fuck’ kind of glance both turned and bowed

“Thank you, are you sure? If you need us Yoongi has our number” They scurried out leaving the faint whirring of the equipment with us. Yoongi gave you a questionable smile

“What? I’d rather just the two us work in the studio, we’re only doing the choruses today”

Yoongi shed his leather jacket and chucked it onto the small leather 2-seater at the back of the room; leaving him in just a plain black v-neck tee and a washed out ripped pair of denim jeans pooling at his vans hi-tops. You looked about as casual with your ripped high waist black skinnies and loose red crop top, you were removing your white converse perched on the arm of the sofa. Again a quizzical look from him.

“I’m comfier without them on when I’m in the studio, okay mr judgey eyes” you toyed playfully, the cheekiness glittering through your pupils

“Off your high horse miss jump to conclusions I wasn’t judging” he paused taking a sip of water. “Merely admiring” he admitted.

“Well I’m sure I can find the converse online somewhere” he glided into the control chair

Guess I’m going in first then

“I’m pretty sure you can’t find what I was looking at anywhere else. Go on you first” his head tilted in the direction of the narrow door connecting to the sound proof recording room, he slotted in the usb and transferred the backing music to the program. Neither of you had spoken about last night, at first you thought it would be awkward but it turns out it seemed to be more of an appetising secret and you were both politely waiting for the main course whilst silently adoring each other’s company amongst the flickering of a candle.

“Of course you can’t” you agreed before securing the door to the studio, the red light above the door ceased to live and the green light neighbouring it sprang into existence. The rectangular room was decorated with plain red walls and topped off with dressings of acoustic foam. The metal microphone hung from the ceiling a chandelier for any music artist. You adjusted the length to correlate with your height and moved the pop filter in line with your mouth. You stood side on to the glass window, Yoongi’s captivating eyes were not going to absorb you today.

“How you want to play this?” he asked through the headphones now sat snuggly cupping your ears blocking surround sound locking you into your element.

“Play the first verse and the first chorus first, then play the lead into the first chorus. The lyrics were laid out, a window to your soul on a neatly folded a4 sheet of paper you begun unfolding. A lot of artists read from their phones now but you were not a lot of artists. Having an editable canvas where you could scribble your own notes where you pleased was essential. You gave Yoongi a thumbs up once you’d completed your vocal warm up, it was shorter than the warm up if you was to be singing and not rapping.

You swayed and moved your head according to the beat which fell flawlessly into your ears and swam through your body transforming it to a pool of rhythm which guided you to freedom. You loved what you’d both created.

“Okay, ready” you affirmed ready to lay down some vocals.

“Go smash it” he encouraged.

For the 20th time you were listening to your words against the music, demanding Yoongi tweak one bit or another.

“Okay put the volume down on the percussion for the last three beats”

He did as he was told, his eyes glued on the screen in front of him, focus never faltering, watching him in his element was enthralling, you mind blocked out the sound of the headphones focusing only on the picture in front of you. His wide ‘well?’ eyes framed a knowing smile finally dragging you into the moment.

“Err… sorry once more” your smile mirroring your vocal apology. You swear you saw him gently shake his head with a grin.

“Perfect” You were done, very rarely can you be distracted in the studio yet here you were picturing less than professional things unfolding in this small space. You decided in that moment before your mind completely clouded that you’ll go home tonight and work on vocals alone away from the irresistible Min Yoongi.

The light red above the door announced your freedom to leave which you took. Yoongi was stood gulping down water like a fire was blazing in his throat.

“Did you do as I asked last night?” you asked, professional mode departed leaving you just wanting to play. He choked on a mouthful.

“What?” he replied in a state of disbelief, backtracking his memories for what you asked of him.

“I’m pretty sure I asked you to stop touching yourself, did you?”

You were sure your eyes must have darkened as a warning to Yoongi. You pressed into him nudging him backwards until he bumped into the edge of the desk. His eyes shifting manically around the room in a panic. You rolled your eyes in jest and headed to the door and turned the lock. Tracing your footsteps back to your prey.

“No…” he asked almost like a question, wanting a hint at the consequences.

“Did you cum?” you asked, nudging his head aside to lay a soft kiss on his neck, you heard the small guilty sigh before he answered

“Yes?” Before he could ask any more questions you caught him in heated kiss which swept both your breaths somewhere else, you unhooked the top button of his jeans, the contact of your lips never faltering

“What…are you…doing?” his hand caught yours and halted any more of your moves.

“Want me to stop?” Your chests racing for each other centimetres apart. He released your hand giving you full reign over his kingdom, the way his head dropped back with his jaw slightly ajar accompanied with the sound that rolled past his lips was intoxicating; near short circuiting your system with the surge it caused at your core; and this was only the result of you touching him. You needed all of him and it drove you nuts.

When you got to your knees there was a brief moment your eyes were held in his as your smirk grew as much as it could as you took him in your mouth. One free hand cupped his balls and the other the base and teased what wasn’t in your mouth. Your tongue danced at his tip

“Jesus Y/N” taking his words with relief drenched behind them as a means to not stop you didn’t. You continued clawing guttural groans from his throat. The sounds he made just did something to you, it reverberated round your mind almost overriding you punishing him. It was only his sudden tightened grip on your hair that pulled you out.

“You’re…going to…” he stuttered, You left him completely, his expression pulled struck with wide eyes glaring at you desperately as you sat with nothing but a grin moulded by the devil himself.

“That’s what you get for not doing what you’re told. It has consequences you know” getting back to your feet. He wasn’t sure how to respond to you or he’d just not caught his breath back, it’s quite likely it’s a mix of both.

“I can’t exactly go out like this though” he pleaded. You were pressed to his chest, eyes darting sideways biting your lip.

“Hmmm, that’s not exactly my problem is it” you cooed. You enjoyed the look of horror wash his face even paler than he was already for a moment before you threw him a lifeline.

“Okay, I’ll be lenient THIS time. You can finish yourself off” His faced creased as he was about to protest but the fight dropped from his face and his own hand sought to fix the ‘situation’

“But” you chimed up before he could start “just before you cum I want you to stop all contact, you can still cum but it won’t be as good for you”.

“You want me to ruin my own orgasm?” he checked hardly believing your words could be so cruel.

“Yes, exactly, this way it’s still a punishment but it still sort outs your…problem” your lips crept smugly to kiss his cheek.

“Just imagine what it’ll be like when you finally get to fuck me” you whispered teasingly into his ear, his breath hitched at your words.

“Who would have thought I could tell Min Yoongi what to do in a studio, that was literally one of the sexiest things I’ve seen”

“Yeah?” he asked searching for reassurance. You wasn’t lying, watching him affected you more than you expected; but you needed way more than the thirty minutes left of studio time available to you.

“Mmhmm” you stalked over to him lightly gripped at his shirt at his chest “Don’t believe me?” you asked with a kiss. You took one of his hands and guided it beneath your waistband. You watched his mouth drop open a silent exhale.

“Fuck, yes I believe you” you couldn’t help but adore and melt at the sight of his pout when you pulled his hand away; your body also arguing the decision.

“Go on we’ve not even got any of your vocals yet” nodding your head toward the studio. He took a moment to sulk before taking begrudging steps away from you.

To say he wasn’t quite in the zone to lay down vocal was an understatement. You probably didn’t help the situation sat chewing the end of a pun seductively shadowing an amused grin at his torment. Five minutes before time was up the rest of the boys bundled into the studio and waited for him before their dance practice started. You both shared glances of yet another dirty secret; with all the chaos that follows all seven of them you didn’t get a chance to say bye properly or let him know you wouldn’t be at his when he got home.

After you messaged your mum asking her to drop off Charlie in the morning you filled Yoongi in.

-I’ll stay at mine tonight to get some more of my vocals done, I find being in enclosed spaces with you way too distracting; P.-

- You find me distracting? :O the audacity after only allowing me a touch-

-If it’s that bad nothing stopping coming to mine, only after I’ve finished working though!-

-I might have to take you up on that offer but also depends if you’ll let me have you drives me insane I’ve not made you cum yet, also last night you never actually told me how you actually wanted me-

You postponed your response until you were laid out on your front drowning in the comfort of your own bed, the scent of fresh bedding heavy in the crimson sheets.

Mum’s the best you thought.

-Remember you asked…

You obviously can’t be trusted to do as you’re told so firstly your hands would be cuffed above your head, I’d have a spreader bar at your ankles keeping your legs spread so I can easily thigh ride you and if you get needy you can’t stop me unless you beg. You will need to use your words to tell me how good it all feels especially when I’ve raided my toy box.

You wasn’t going to be too specific you’d rather his imagination have free reign of that.

If you’re good then I’ll let you have me. I’ve been dying to find out the extent of that tongue technology and how my hands look round your neck. Only when you’re so hard it hurts and you’re begging me I’ll let you cum. If you don’t do as you’re told, well you know now they’ll be consequences-

He’ll be practising now but you were buzzed wishing to see his face when he did read it, curiosity blooming to see how he’ll deal with all that in the middle of his day.

The house was a void of noise, the lack of quiet tapping of claws across the wood flooring of the apartment filled you with emptiness; before allowing it to completely consume you, you escorted yourself and you glass of wine to your studio.

#bts #btssmutclub #sub-bts-network #kwritersworldnet #networkbangtan #kpopwonderlandtag #hyunglinenetwork #bangtanarmynet #min yoongi #BTS suga #suga x reader #yoongi smut #yoongi x reader

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vapormaison · 4 years

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2019 Best Japanese OST Press/Repress: Elfen Lied by Tiger Lab Records

Like many late millennials with artistic pretensions, I used to have an “Anituber” channel back in the wild west days of youtube. From 2010-2013 — roughly corresponding with my first three years in university — I reviewed DVD releases from ADV, Manga Entertainment, Central Park Media, and Geneon — all the big players in Western anime releases at the time, all dead and gone now with the rise of streaming. Everyone but Funimation — a sad irony and perhaps telling about the nature of the dubbing industry that the studio with a serial rape problem and established casting couch was the only one to survive.

In the interest of maintaining my personal ethics, posterity, and sanity I’ve long since deleted that channel. While there was definitely a “moment” on the platform for a nineteen year-old cokehead film student in front of a MacBook webcam doing his best Slavoj Zizek impression, that moment has long since passed. I’ve long since cooled on “substantive” media critique anyway. The world doesn’t need another Eisenstein-aligned Marxist analysis of Neon Genesis Evangelion — or, a 6-part series on using Lacanian techniques to develop a leftist praxis for Fate/Stay Night. Media exists in the present moment to be a salve for the postmodern hellscape we inhabit together.

As an interesting sidebar, the most popular video on that channel — raking in just north of 10k views over its lifetime from 2011-2015, was a twelve minute video essay on the 1995 anime Elfen Lied, where I asserted that it was the ultimate expression of contemporary Japanese anti-modern rage. While I don’t find myself particularly nostalgic for any of the content on that channel, I’m actually kind of proud of that one in particular.

While most of my analysis was fixated on the visuals, narrative, and recent oeuvre of its mangaka, Lynn Okamoto, and series director, Mamoru Kanbei, I did lay out a framework on why I consider it to be one of the most successful soundtracks ever produced for an anime. I did not heap this praise lightly, as that roughly fifteen year period of 1995-2010 was bookended by the OSTs of Evangelion and K-On! — and certainly proved to be one of the most sonically iconic periods that the medium has ever produced.

it was also one of the first soundtracks that spurred my own history of Japanese OST collection.

And, then, almost a decade later, I found out that Tiger Lab was releasing a vinyl of Elfen Lied.

In spite of this, when I originally the news, I felt a tinge of trepidation. This is not to throw shade at Tiger Lab, however — but at the reputation of previous releases of the Elfen Lied soundtrack in Japan. A quick adventure with google translate across the Japanese net for various Elfen Lied OST roleases — especially on CD — will reveal for you a lot of contempt from Otaku and anime-enthusiast audiophiles for any number of reasons. Most hinge on the quality of the physicals. This is often because Japanese physical media releases of anime soundtracks are often laden with fresh, exceptionally crisp and clean-sounding masters for CDs, and usually exclusive posters and other content geared toward the “collector” nature of many Otaku. This has usually not been the case with Elfen Lied.

A friend of mine in Kanagawa quipped “Sometimes it sounds better on the DVD” in regard to a number of OST releases of soundtracks from anime produced by Studio Arms with CD releases published by VAP. Admittedly, some of it must have been born in resentment, but I’ve always trusted the man’s opinion — as he’s invested a small family fortune into building a shrine of sorts to that studio’s output. He chalks up the poor release quality to the studio’s inability or lack of funds to master the content properly for a CD or HQ digital release, and VAP’s decline in release quality during the early 2000s roughly corresponding to a sale to another Zaibatsu. “Studio Arms made hentai for many years to stay solvent, maybe they could not send a good master to VAP [the publisher]” he told me. While I can’t know if it’s VAP, Arms or another studio handling the CD-master work, a cursory check of their oeuvre seems to confirm confirms that claim of his — but I acknowledge I’m wandering into uncharted waters here.

In spite of all that — I ordered the wax from Tiger Lab and was duly impressed. In lieu of reviewing each track as per my usual review format, in the following section I want to talk about my listening experience from the two formats I own the soundtrack in — the SA/VAP published CD from 2004 and Tiger Lab’s release. Once we finish going into the core differences — and why this vinyl is absolutely worth your purchase over competing physicals — I’ll go into the virtues of the listening experience on the whole.

Part 1: Comparisons of Select Tracks

I suppose the expectation is that I start off by taking about the most iconic recording from the series — the OP, Lilium. In the spirit of defying expectations, I’ll begin with what I consider a better litmus test.

My personal shit-test for a good master and press is how well it can handle a track that is sonically robust and diverse, crossing genre and form — requiring an intensive, sufficiently wide mix and refined master. You don’t get that on every OST album — but Elfen Lied offers one such potential track in particular, and that particular track happens to be my favorite composition on the entire album. Uso Sora, composed by Kayo Konishi and Yukio Kondo is a truly magnificent piece, and it’s used brilliantly in the series — for those familiar, I only need to quote one line: “M-m-mommy…?”.

It begins with lulling piano chords that gradually build in tempo and energy with the addition of percussion, and then it undergoes a full metamorphosis in its last minute or so to become an aggressive, frenetic techno piece with distorted lows and an angry drum kit. Mirroring the evolution of its subject in the show with understated aplomb, and functioning as a robust and enjoyable composition divorced from its source — it really deserve more recognition than it receives, but I do not doubt it will ever step forth from the massive shadow cast from the haunting chorals of Lilium, and the brilliantly directed visual intro that accompanied it.

Needless to say, Tiger Lab more than passed muster here, to the point where I’m almost blown away by just how good it sounds compared to the rest of my Elfen Lied related physicals. I experienced a definite brightness from the vinyl master over my stereo that I don't get from a lot of other Western label releases, like say Milano, which tends to cash in on a Westerner’s preference for warmth. Tiger Lab deserves credit for this approach, because it genuinely feels like a more authentically “Japanese” sound. In my experience, the Western labels that care the most about the dedicated audiophile adhere to this sonic profile, and Tiger Lab deserves all due credit here.

Finally, I might as well include my thoughts on Lilium. In short, it sounds fantastic. The mix here really brings out the most of the chorals, and provides crisp and clean sounds where you want them most. It’s also one of those tracks where you can just feel the dynamic range before you even hear it. I ended up listening to these on my Cambridges, and I’ve got to say that’s there’s something in the way they treat this particular profile of song — strongly vocal dominated, extremely muted piano, and supporting string inhabiting the negative space — absolutely incredibly. It put the KEFs to shame. I’ve always asserted that you’ve got to pair certain songs with certain speaker pairs. I’ve never been a huge devotional music guy, and I’m not entirely sure that the Cambridge or KEFs provide ideal profiles for the track. That said, Lilium sounds great anyway.

But I can envision these on a pair of high end Yamahas, or a pair of vintage Blaupunkt bookshelves sounding as stone-cold killer as Lucy when Kouta’s threatened.

I sent a rip to my friend Hiroshi, the StudioArms Shrine man, who immediately snapped up a copy after listening. I also learned that it was actually the first vinyl purchase he’s ever made after two decades of serious collecting. So perhaps that is a testament in and of itself!

Part 2: Physicality

I rarely devote an entire section to talking about the vinyl/OBI itself, but then again, Tiger Lab has put out a release certainly worthy of this. First off, the cover, which pairs perfectly with the overall aesthetic of both the series and previous soundtrack releases. I can imagine this being a release that has already attracted some attention by Japanese collectors, as the cover seems to tap into a certain sense of continuity that I know are a huge hit with that community. It certainly pairs well with my two releases from VAP, and a laserdisc set that I have. They all opt for that very iconic Klimt Vienna Secession style with appropriate creative flourishes — but I like Tiger Lab’s take on it the most. The side characters populating the back in a choral array reminiscent of the Beethoven Frieze is also a really nice touch for any enthusiast of the fin-de-siècle style.

I picked up the pink vinyl on release, one of the few pink vinyls that I’ve bought that at least feels thematically consistent with the release and not just a default “vaporwave” or “city pop” or “future funk” styling. Diclonii rock the pink hair, after all. That all said, I’m wishing now that I got the “metallic gold” edition, as its another color that feels both apropos and stunningly beautiful. With all that in mind, this is also one of the better waxes that I’ve felt in-hand, and manages to feel robust. I’ve yet to find specific info, but it certainly feels like a 180g.

In conclusion, I’ve got to give immense credit to Tiger Lab for handling this release with a class and vigor that few Japanese publishers have given it. It certainly bodes well for the future of anime releases on vinyl, and makes me eager to fill out an emergent collection.

#ost #elfen lied #bestof2019

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