#that can't happen but no one touch me I've made myself upset
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i'm used to it, and how bad it is, and how often it's so bad that it rings like a bell inside of me, drowning out everything around me. and the truth is that i get frustrated with myself about it - again? we're like this still? again? it's not that i feel weak, precisely. it's just this sense almost like - i've already been pushing against this thing for years now, shouldn't i have gained more ground?
i get frustrated because i'm sick of picking up the loose ends every six months. i get frustrated because it's always this same shit, same problem - i lose myself in a matter of months; spiral out of control, lose touch with friends and loved ones. i stop taking care of myself and therapy gets hard and i let everything around me wilt and shrivel and fall off; start somehow both sleeping too much and not-enough. i panic-attack and cry in my car in a target parking lot, pulling my hair out and hurting my ribs from sobbing so hard - and later, when i'm better, i'm embarrassed because how could i let it get that far?
it feels like - i already have done this so many times. isn't there a way out of it? isn't there a point where i've just... won? that it never happens again, that i just get to be done? maybe this is weakness, i guess - that i still (so often!) succumb.
i am used to it, so i forget exactly how hard it gets. do you even know how many times i've laid in bed, exhausted, blank and numb and listless and said - i can't anymore. i just can't. i'm not even really upset. it's okay. i've been here long enough. so much of my life was beautiful.... i'm just... done.
do you know how many times i woke up and i said - i can't and put my feet on the floor and said i can't, i don't want to and took a shower and walked the dog and bought myself fresh bread and put a nice playlist on and said i really can't, there's no end to this and i went to work and i called a friend and i made myself cookies even if food tasted like ashes and decided that i really should wait for the new album from that artist i love and i thought i can't, it's not worth it and then i washed my hands and cut my hair and drank more water and wrote a poem and signed up for an art class at the local community college and said i can't, i can't, i won't do this again, and i paid my rent and let the dishes rot in the sink but still made myself eat anything fresh even if it meant overdrawing my account on a stupid bag of plums just because they looked delicious and do you know how often i closed my eyes and thought this is it i really fucking can't, something has to give and i have nothing left that it can take and then i went to bed and i got up and i fucking survived anyway
yesterday the local ice cream place opened up for the first time this season and they were giving out tiny samples of their new dairy-free options and i tried a mango sorbet. three months ago i was positive that februrary was going to be my last month on the planet. i am teaching my dog a new trick and i just discovered a new band i love. i got a plant from the clearance aisle and repotted her and she's been perking up. i made salmon for alison and we ate it in her new house with her new beautiful baby girl. my manager told me he keeps recommending my work to others just because i always include a stupid number of puns. tomorrow i'm trying a new dance class. tomorrow i'm maybe going to buy more plums.
i forget, you know? it's not some bone-deep strength or some magical power. it's that some part of me knows - i need to stay. in all of this; out of all of this - i just want to choose love.
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*contemplates existence for a second*
Hissy Kitty
Part 3
Part 2
Alastor X Reader
Warnings ⚠
⚠ we love seeing a man lose his mind, mentions of stabbing, poor noodle bean Pentious ⚠
As the shadows in the room grew, Alastor paced back and forth with his hand covering his mouth.
His mind jumping from one thought to another.
I don't understand what's happening! I should know what's happening! Why don't I know!?
Walking faster, he laughed and moved the hand that was on his mouth to run his fingers through his hair.
There were flashes of you appearing in his thoughts. That cold hateful glare, your eyes glowing radiantly as you hissed at him. The way you stood your ground in a powerful stance as the ears on your head were pinned back.
God you looked terrific.
NO!
He shook his head.
Angry, confused, anxious, happy. Emotions battled within him as he continued to pace.
"Oh fucking hell.", he gripped his hair on the sides of his head. "Holy fuck, whatever shall I do with this?"
The Radio Demon was feeling something new and he didn't know what to do with it. He didn't know what it was and that made him upset.
He had to know.
Needed to know.
To be in control.
He couldn't have his emotions taking hold of him. He couldn't have you messing with his heart head.
"The¥ Ωe€d +o &θ.", he growled out with a clenched jaw.
Now he knew why Husker didn't want them around.
They are a distraction, a detour in his plans. Too much trouble to have nearby. A weakness.
He stopped at that.
A weakness..
The static grew even louder, causing the widows to crack and break.
"Ha..hahaha.", he dropped his arms and leaned against his desk with one hand. "Hahaha-AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!", he laughed, moving a hand to his stomach as he bended inwards. "HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!"
He scratched deep claw marks into his desk.
"Ha..."
The room got quiet.
Not a single sound came from him, there was no static or laugh track as he realized what the new emotion filling his chest was.
This wasn't part of the plan..
"This can't go on. I must extinguish this disgusting feeling.", he furrowed his brows. "How absurd. To think such a demon could make me doubt myself."
Removing his claws out from the table, he flicked his hand to rid of the wood chips that stuck onto him.
Fixing his coat and snapping his fingers, he had his creatures get to fixing the windows.
"Let's get to work boys. I need this place to be spotless.", he said without so much as a glance, making his way to the trap door.
"Everything needs to be in perfect θrd€r."
The latch closed as he exited the radio tower.
.
You sat on one of the dining table chairs.
The Princess had asked Niffty to make you a uniform and you were waiting for the little demon to show up.
"Oooh! I'm so excited! I've already got all of tomorrow's activities planned out!", Charlie said and bounced in place. "I hope you don't mind wearing the hotel colors."
"I don't mind at all.", you smiled. "I just hope I can get at least three shirts."
"Let's check in with Niffty when she gets here.", the blonde said looking at the door before glancing back at you. "You know.. I'm curious about something."
"What's up?", you give her your attention.
"Are you and Alastor like...you know.", she waves her hand around. "Together?"
Blink blink.
"What?"
"It's just that I see him around you almost all the time, and Alastor is very picky with who he touches.", she explains. "I mean if it isn't dancing then he wouldn't really engage in contact. Sure he's patted me on the shoulder once or twice but honestly that's really it.", she then leans a little closer. "I totally understand if you don't want to say anything but I support your relationship."
You just stared at the Princess, not sure what to say.
Thankfully you didn't have to as Niffty ran into the room.
"I've got my needles!", she smiled wide. "Who am I stabbing?"
"No, no!", Charlie waved her hands as to say stop. "Not stabbing! We need a uniform."
"Oh, ok!", the cyclops pulled out a tailors measuring tape. "Up! Up! I need to take your measurements!"
You got up and walked over, letting her guide you to make it easier to get the right measurements. As the little demon measured your arm, you thought about what Charlie said.
He only did that to annoy Husk, there's no way he likes me in that way. Why am I even thinking about this? It's so obvious that I'm just something to play with to him. You spread your arms out so Niffty could measure the back of your shoulders. Maybe it's because Charlie thinks so. I know it couldn't happen.
The cyclops moved to measure your waist.
Yeah, it would never happen.
"All done!", Niffty pulled out a sewing needle. "Now for the fun part.", she grinned.
"Do you think you could make me two or three shirts?", you asked. "It's ok if you can't."
"I can!", she said and sprinted out of the room. "I'll leave them in your room when I'm done!"
You waved to Charlie as you left, making your way over to your room.
I hope there's no bugs on my bed again. You shivered at the memory. That was so gross.
"Exsscusse me.", someone said from behind you.
Turning around, you saw Sir Pentious.
"Oh! Hi Pentious! What can I do for you?", you asked with a smile.
"I'm..uh. I have a question, if that'sss alright?", he asks, fidgeting with his fingers.
"Sure! What's on your mind?", you replied.
"Are you being courted by the Radio Demon?", he asked.
...
"What?"
"What?"
You held your hands out as to say stop and shook your head with a laugh. "No. What in the world gave you that idea?"
"Well.. he'sss been around you so often and he takess care of you.",the snake demon explains. "I just thought with sssuch actions, he'd be trying to attract you."
Someone else thought Alastor and I were together? Does it really look like that?
"Why the question?", you asked.
"Um..I want to know how to court ssomeone.", he said shyly.
You gasped excitedly.
"Oh! Do you have a special someone!?", you took hold of his hands. "Do I know them!?", you asked.
Before Sir Pentious could say anything, you were yanked away from him.
"Woah!"
Your back was pressed against something warm. Static buzzed loudly, making the fur on your ears and tail tingle. The shadows got darker and started to take shape of sinister creatures.
"H@πd$ øff."
The vibrations from his radio voice came from his chest, which you felt rumble through you.
"Alastor?", you said nervously.
"W-wait!", Pentious backed up. "All I did wass asssk a quesstion!"
"I'm &o¡ng t⁰ ©0ok ¥∅u |ik€ ®oti$serie ¢hick€n!", the deer demon threatened.
"Alastor!", you shouted and turned in his hold to grab his face, tilting his head down. "Damn it! WHAT ARE YOU DOING!?"
Finally he stopped, red eyes dimming the glowing and now focused on you. Pentious took this as a chance to escape and slithered off quickly.
"What just happened?"
*goes back to typing* I'm good.
~Seline, the person.
Part 4
Taglist@
@c4rved-pumpk1n @scary-noodlesblog @stolas-thebirb @naelys-the-aster @biromanticboba @lbcreations-blog @ducky-died-inside @kiraisastay @pooplyface1423 @line-viper @117s-girl @spiderlegsling @alastorsgoldie @repentant-repeller @kcsketches @lofasofabread @kotaleee @im-coolrat @superzombiewho @speckle-meow-meow @jammcookie @dilucragnvindr-my-beloved @trashbin-nie @koioli @fatherlesschild2 @mmik3yy @just-here-reading @jane-3043 @chocolat3pudding @chewbrry @dewdropsposts @danveration @jyoongim @iloveblogging2 @elaemae @hallowedandhungry @fandom-nobody @nevermore-ramblings @creepylilneko @perilous-pasta @xdolls-crownx @hxzbinwrites @alikate82 @angeliclovely69 @line-viper @tsukilover11 @cheshairacat @the-unhinged-raccoon @plapperlapapp @thesimpguru @stevenuniversezanite @random-3455 @hypnossses @crazyforbarnes @ngjhgftujgrtui @haveawanderfulday @dark-stars-and-the-moons-melody @karolinda007-blog @twistedkisses @ghostedddd @viridiya @akiqvq @gracesupremacy @i-like-potatoes12533 @dappersapperdoodle @nealeart @hudiexiaoying @+?
ML for Alastor🎙 | HK ChL😾
#alastor#alastor hazbin hotel#hazbin alastor#hazbin hotel alastor#x reader#alastor the radio demon#gn reader#the radio demon#alastor x reader#fanfic#husk hazbin hotel#older brother husk#hazbin hotel husk#cat demon reader#protective older brother husk#hazbin hotel#sir pentious#charlie morningstar#niffty hazbin hotel
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Owl Post
Sebastian Sallow x Reader
Warnings: None
Summary: Sebastian notices you are upset about not getting post, so decides to write you a small love letter to brighten your morning
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
You sat at the your house table in the Great Hall, a slight frown marring your usually cheerful face. You absentmindedly stirred your porridge, glancing around at the students who were receiving letters and packages from their families and friends. The owls soared gracefully through the enchanted ceiling, delivering messages to eager recipients.
Sebastian, your new long term flame, was sitting a few seats down and couldn't help but notice your disappointed expression. He had overheard you complaining to Poppy about never receiving owl mail, finding the mornings in the Great Hall a bit less exciting compared to others. A mischievous smile played on his lips as an idea sparked in his mind. He decided that he would be the one to change that.
Late that night, Sebastian sat in the common room with parchment and a quill, carefully crafting a heartfelt letter to you. He poured his feelings onto the page, expressing the warmth and admiration he felt for you. He sealed the envelope with a dash of wax and pressed it so it was nice and tightly closed, grinning at the surprise waiting to happen. The next morning, before breakfast, Sebastian carefully made his way to the Owlery to choose and owl to deliver the special letter. He whispered his instructions to the her and watched as it soared off into the early morning sky, disappearing among the clouds.
As you entered the Great Hall that morning, you noticed the familiar fluttering of wings above you. A brown, pleasant looking owl descended gracefully, landing in front of you with a small note attached to its leg. Surprised, you took the letter and untied it from the owl's leg. You could hardly contain her excitement as you recognized Sebestians distinctive handwriting. You look over to him, giving him a questioning look but all he did was shrug and smile, going back to the food on his plate
Curiosity and delight danced in your eyes as you slowly unfolded the parchment and began to read:
My Dearest Y/N,
I hope this letter finds you in the best of spirits, and that the sight of this owl bearing my words brings a smile to your face. I've noticed the lack of owl posts in your life, and I couldn't stand the thought of your mornings being any less delightful than they should be.
There's something magical about the way your eyes light up when you're excited or passionate about something. It's a sight I've come to cherish, and it never fails to brighten my day. I've been meaning to tell you how much I love the way you look when you're lost in thought, a thousand galaxies swirling in your eyes.
Some of my fondest memories involve sneaking on to late night walks with you after curfew on those clear nights when the rest of the world was asleep and finding a nice quiet place to just look at the stars while in each others arms. Stargazing with you is like being transported to another realm, where time stands still, and it's just us against the vastness of the universe. Those stolen moments are etched into my heart, and I find myself yearning for more every day.
And I can't help but mention the small glances we share across the common room. It's as if our eyes have a language of their own, speaking volumes in silence. Those stolen glances, the unspoken connection, they make me fall more and more in love with you with each passing day. It's a love that grows stronger, deeper, and more profound.
For the first time in a long time, I feel at home. Not just within the stone walls of Hogwarts, but within the warmth of your laughter, the gentleness of your touch, and the genuine connection we share. You've become an important part of who I am becoming, and I can't imagine it any other way.
I know we've just started this journey together, and I want you to know that I meant every word I said that first night we spent together. I am planning on spending my life with you. Thank you for believing in me and seeing the potential that no one has seen before.
Forever and Always yours,
Sebastian Sallow
As you reached the end of the letter, face hurting from the smiling it caused you couldn't help but look over at Sebastian once more, who was watching you with an expectant grin. You eyes met, and a silent understanding passed between the two of you. You mouthed a heartfelt "thank you" to Sebastian, your eyes sparkling with gratitude.
Sebastian just winks, a mixture of mischief and genuine affection in his gaze.
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I requested earlier about emily, but I see now you only do JJ. Can you maybe do a JJ daughter fix where JJ comforts her after an anxiety/panic attack instead. Thank you in advance
2 3 4
pairing: jennifer jareau x daughter reader
category: fluff, hurt/comfort
warnings: panic attack
word count: 703
age: 15
summary: you have a panic attack and your mom is there to help you
I sat down at my kitchen counter, doing my math homework that had been left undone for the past week since of how busy my schedule was. I had sports and clubs and homework for other classes and this week wasn't even close to the last thing I had to do.
"Hey hon." My mom walked through the front door with a sigh, setting down her bag before walking over to me. "What are you working on?"
"Math."
"Oh. Good luck." She said with a laugh, rubbing my back before walking away. Normally I would laugh at her joke but it just made my chest a bit tighter than it was before.
"Mom." My voice came out as barely a whisper.
"Hm?" She came back down the stairs while staring at her phone.
"I need uh..." I couldn't get the words out. "C-can you...can you help me?"
"Yeah of course." She sat down next to me. "This one?" She pointed to problem 17 and I nodded. "Ok let me get a look." I nodded and pushed the paper towards her, my hand shaking slightly. "Hey, take a breath, it's ok, we'll work it out."
"Y-yeah I know." I rubbed my hands together, trying to take deep breaths and sit up straight to get the awful tight feeling out of my chest.
"Ok so if this side is 3x squared plus the square root of y..." Her voice trailed out as I lost focus, my vision getting a bit blurry. I was lightheaded and the feeling in my chest was getting worse, I could barely breathe. "Hey. Hey y/n? You there?" She snapped her fingers in front of my face and I flinched.
"Hi." I whispered.
"Ok...what's wrong?" She put the pencil down and pushed the paper out of my vision.
"I can't...can't breathe."
"Ok." She nodded, realizing the problem. "It's ok. Can you look at me?" I opened my mouth to say something but nothing came out. "It's ok. Just look at me." She gently touched my jaw and turned my head towards her. "Is it ok if I put my hand on your chest?" I thought about it and shook my head.
"C...can we hug? I n-need pressure." She nodded and put her arms around me slowly so she didn't startle me. She pulled me in tight, making sure to apply a lot of pressure. I could feel her heartbeat against my chest.
"Can you feel my chest? Can you feel me breathing?" I nodded, taking in shaky breaths, everything becoming hazy. "Good. That's good, can you try to match my breathing?" I nodded and tried to slow my breathing to match hers but it wasn't working.
"I can't mom I can't do it-"
"Shh. It's ok." She rubbed my back. "I'm gonna count for you, ok?" I nodded and gulped. "In 2, 3, 4...out 2, 3, 4." She repeated that over and over again until my breathing slowed. "Good. You did so good."
"I don't know what happened." I avoided eye contact but she didn't let me.
"Hey hey hey. Eyes on me." She held my face in her hands and turned my head to face her. "Just focus on me. Don't think about what made you anxious, ok? That's only gonna make it worse."
"Mhm." I gulped and took another deep breath.
"Just focus on me." I stared into her eyes while fidgeting with my fingers in my lap. After about ten minutes I had completely calmed down so I pulled away. I tried to start on my homework again but she pulled it away. "No more homework tonight."
"But-"
"I know you're behind honey. I've had many emails from your teachers-"
"I know I'm sorry-"
"Shh shh, no apologies." She kissed my forehead. "I'm not upset, I promise. You're overworking yourself. Take the day off from school tomorrow, ok? You need rest. I'll take the day off from work too, to be here if you need me."
"Really?" I felt myself tearing up.
"Of course. Nothing matters to me more than you." She wiped my tears away as they fell. "I love you honey. I'm always here for you if you need me."
"I love you too mom."
#criminal minds#jennifer jareau#x reader#jennifer jareau x reader#jennifer jareau x you#x daughter reader#x daughter!reader
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Road to recovery- Part 9
masterlist
As Pablo was looking in my eyes I could feel butterflies in my stomach. He really makes me feel things I've never felt before. I've had stupid crushes on guys before but what I feel for Pablo is different I have real feelings for him. In that moment I just wanted to let all of my feelings out and deal with the consequences later but before I could the sensible side of my brain kicked in and told me not to do that as it was just an objectively bad idea. Eventually Pablo broke the eye contact so to help stop myself from saying something I'll regret I went right back to leaning my head on his shoulder. Unlike last time Pablo tensed up when my head rested against him so I moved slightly thinking I was hurting him but when I did he was just as tense so I stopped resting against him all together.
I nearly started crying again thinking that there's no way he feels the same way I do. He was happy to comfort me but after that he didn't want me touching him anymore which hurt because it's so unlike Pablo. The whole time we've known each other he's been more than ok with physical contact between us but all of the sudden it seems like he doesn't want me near him. Maybe he can sense that I have feelings for him and he wants to distance himself as he doesn't feel the same way. The thought that this might be the beginning of him distancing himself from me really hurt; as much as the last few days have been difficult overall Pablo has made my life so much better and with him I've been so much happier so to be without him is really going to take a toll on me.
The longer we sat just in silence the more I felt like I had to get out of there. Something has changed between us and I don't think I like it and I definitely don't want to deal with it especially not right now. I could feel tears brimming at the edge of my eyes and I can't cry in front of Pablo again as he'll ask what's wrong and I can't tell him that I'm upset because he doesn't feel the same way I do. After some thinking I knew the best thing was for me to go home as then I can get some sleep and wake up in the morning hopefully less emotional so I can't think properly about everything that's happened today and what's best for me going forward. I wanted to text my brother to come and get me but my phone was in my bag which is by the door where I left it when I first arrived. After some internal debating I got myself up and went to make my way to get my phone as I really do need to get out of here for my own sanity.
"Where are you going?" Pablo asked
"To get my phone it's in my bag" I said
"Is everything ok?" He asked
"Yeah I'm just going to text my brother to come and get me" I said not having the energy to lie
"Wait come back" he said taking me by surprise
"God I don't even know how to say this" he muttered
Hearing that made me panic was he really about to tell me that it's best if we spend some time apart or that we not be friends anymore. I was hoping if this was going to happen it could at least happen over time like a slow ghost sort of situation but I guess not.
"It's ok I get it I'll just text my brother and he'll be here soon" I said not wanting to hear the words come from his mouth
"No you don't get it I have feelings for you Lola like real feelings beyond what friends should feel for each other" he admitted
It was a good thing that he got me to sit back down as I think I would've fainted if he said that when I was stood up. As it is my brain is already struggling to process what has just happened I really didn't expect Pablo to say he had feelings for me but deep down it's what I have been hoping to hear for weeks. While I was processing everything and letting it all sink in I couldn't help but let a smile creep onto my face as it felt like such a relief to know that I'm not the only one who's developed feelings between us. Just as I was about to say something I looked up and noticed that Pablo looked so anxious which made me realised that I'd spent quite a while thinking and he was probably dying inside.
"I'm sorry I shouldn't have said that I've ruined everything I get if you still want to leave and probably never see me again" Pablo rambled
"Stop you haven't ruined anything I have feelings for you too you just took me by surprise I promise I feel exactly the same I can't put it into words but I feel something special for you" I interrupted him
"Oh thank god I thought I'd ruined everything" he said
We then fell into silence again. Neither of us knew what to do or what to say next. Clearly we both lack experience in admitting our feelings for someone as after getting that weight of our chests we didn't know what's supposed to happen next. I suppose things will never be the same as they were before now but I don't really know what this means for the future as right now we are just friends who have feelings for each other but we can't stay that way forever. I imagine the next logical step is to explore our feelings for each other by maybe going on a date but I feel like we spend so much time together that a date won't feel any different especially as there's no way we can go out anywhere together.
No one tells you what to do when you finally admit that you have feelings for someone you're just supposed to know I guess. I suppose for other people it's different me and Pablo don't exactly have a normal relationship so things are different for us. We can't go out and get coffee or dinner together as I think we might break the internet and definitely my phone as it's just been hanging in there after we were seen at the game together. Going somewhere is what most people do for a first date so you can get to know the person you are going out with on a different level but Pablo and I already know so much about each other and have seen each other at our worst. The other option is something chill like a movie night but we do that together all the time as we have nothing else to do so how do you make that feel like a date and not just like we are hanging out like we would do any other day. There's also the worry of us not being compatible as a couple but I don't even want to think about that right now.
"So what do we do now?" I asked
"I want to have a proper date with you and I know we can't go out anywhere so would you want to come here and I'll set something up" he said
"I'd love that" I replied
"I know it won't be much different to what we do now but I'll try and make it special plus if we call it a date it will feel more like a date right" he laughed
"I always think you have to say it to believe it" I joked
"You best be ready it's going to be the best non date date you will have ever been on" he smiled
"Oh wow I better prepare myself then" I laughed
He told me to come over next Saturday and just so I don't forget that it's a date he set up an event in my calendar to remind me which he titles best date ever. As much as it won't be much different to what we do whenever we see each other the fact that Pablo is already trying to hard to make it special makes me excited to see where this all goes.
#gavi imagine#gavi imagines#pablo gavi imagine#pablo gavi imagines#gavi#gavi oneshots#gavi x reader#pablo gavi#football imagine
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I could talk about this resident evil 8 AU for days! I've actually been keeping myself from posting more asks That way I can get your response/feedback before I start adding more.
Miranda definitely projects onto Mirabel in fact when she first got there Miranda didn't give her to Alcina and instead had her living with her and she refused to call her by her name and was calling her Eva instead. she did that for like a week before she gave her to Alcina but when she gets extremely upset with her she will call her Eva and tell her that she's her daughter.
Speaking of Alcina her and her daughters relationship with Mirabel is.... Complicated to say the least. Mirabel loves Alcina and her daughters because Alcina took her in and truly did act like a mother figure that would never harm her and they all loved her like their own but Mirabel hates unnecessary cruelty/violence which is something the Dimitrescu family loves to do. they try to tone it down by a large amount because they saw how much it truly bothered her but they all are very temperamental/sadistic which I think is a by-product of their version of the mutations (plus the fact that they need to eat people to survive) so they aren't very successful which put a bit of stain on their relationship with Mirabel. Which they are all very aware of and try everything in their power to bridge the gap with her to varying degrees of success.
When Miranda forces Maribel to experiment on her family Maribel does what she could to defy her in the moment which was to beg and plead with her not to do it and to try and get her to change her mind. But after she threatened to experiment on them herself Maribel went ahead and did it (Miranda doesn't use actual anesthesia she instead uses a paralyzer so when she experiments on people they can't move but they are awake and aware of everything that's happening That includes all of the Lords)
When there are experiments of hers that has the result being something like the lycans she immediately puts them down herself that way the person inside isn't suffering and there aren't a bunch of monsters running around that she created and causing mass casualties/complete chaos. Which is something that karl argues with her a lot about saying that she's wasting potential soldiers for the army against Miranda.
Speaking of Karl they have a very love-hate relationship. They both sometimes get together and get along over their mutual hatred of Miranda and try to make plans to stop her but because they both go about it in two very different ways they often are arguing with each other on how to stop Miranda (it also doesn't help that Mirabel spend a good portion of her time with Alcina who hates him) both are convinced that their way is the right way and can't believe the other one can't see what they're doing wrong. The way that Mirabel is trying to stop her is by trying to create a brand new body for her daughter to go in that way there is no need for a human vessel and instead she has her own freshly made body to take over and we all know karl's way of trying to stop Miranda.
Mirabel does not physically touch The orphans/her family without wearing a pair of leather gloves because she "doesn't want a monster like myself touching people so pure and innocent."
Speaking of the family Julieta does NOT want to let Mirabel out of her sight. None of them do but Julieta is probably the worst out of all of them about that and had the most visceral reaction when Miranda slaps mirabel across the face (which she does when they are in the middle of dinner she wanted to make sure that the entire family was in one area and saw her "light punishment".)
SO COULD I. But I could also talk about Resident Evil all day in general. I blame my friend because she got me into it 😭😭
Honestly, it’s so sad that Miranda projects onto her. I mean this whole thing started because she simply couldn’t cope with her daughter’s death and really thought she could bring her back. And now she’s taking poor Mirabel and treating her like she Eva and not…Mirabel. Like what is this, Law and Order?? SVU??? Imagine how terrified Mirabel is. She was kidnapped, and is now being called some random name. And then even after that, Miranda will snap at her and call her Eva, which is WILD. And then she made her experiment on her family. And Mirabel only did it because she didn’t want her family to suffer to much in the aftermath and. Let’s be real here, Mirabel’s mortality rates are way lower than Miranda’s when it comes to experimental stuff 🗿
Honestly, I can see and honestly agree that Mirabel does care for Lday D and her daughters, but like. Morally, she CANNOT agree with the stuff they do. Like when she found out, she did understand that they needed it to survive, but she felt like they could have done it by more. You know. Conventional means. Or at least very least more humane 💀 she wants to be close, but honestly that whole sadistic killing thing and making wine out of their blood is just not how she rolls ☹️ and with Karl. They remind me of siblings, I mean they both can agree a some (very few) things, but just refuse to hear the other out, but honestly it’s kinda understandable.
ALSO MIRABEL WEARING GLOVES I CAN’T. LIKE I CAN’T RN. FR. Like the fact that she feels like that breaks my heart I can’t do this 🤧🤧 light punishment is actually crazy. Like clinically insane. Which Miranda probably is tbh. I understand Julieta’s reaction, shoot I wouldn’t let her outta my sight either 🌚📸 like imagine how horrified she was when Mirabel just SAT THERE AND TOOK IT. Idk about Julieta, but let somebody do that to my child and we gone take it outside 🧌
This how that dinner went:
Ok I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m gone 🌫️🌫️
#my asks#my asks are open#encanto#encanto au#au#encanto mirabel#encanto julieta#mother miranda#lady dimitrescu#alcina dimitrescu#karl heisenberg#resident evil#resident evil 8#re#re 8#resident evil village#resident evil au
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Laurance and Garroth training, or when they first say eachother after the Irene dimension, or after Laurance came back from the nether (either the first time or the s3 time), or breakfast at the guard quarters
(Some ideas, idk)
I am so ill about them where do I even begin (branching off of these ideas below, may write one out)
Training is so fucking homoerotic, especially if they're in their kinda pissy phase where they don't quite know how to feel about each other yet. They'd be taunting each other and if either manages to nick the other mmmmmm they'd be pissed.
~~~
So upset about the irene dimension "reuniting". Laurance should have panicked thinking he was having another hallucination. He should have backed away from Aphmau (as Zane) and began to try and figure out what was actually in front of him and what was a hallucination because Garroth and Zane can't be back they just can't he should have BEEN there when Garroth came back. And then Garroth gets confused cuz Laurance looks terrified of him and he wonders what happened while he was away because look at Laurance. And he'd walk near him and call out to him and Laurance would shut his eyes and curse because what is happening right now it sounds just like Garroth it can't be, and Garroth touches his arm and Laurance realizes this is real, Garroth is here and he missed him coming back. He should have been there but he ran off and Garroth got back, somehow, without him. And aaaaaaugh stop me I'm gonna explode with this one
~~~
Laurance coming back from the nether the first time I've read sooo many times, I don't think I could do it better than what I've read. And after s3, well, I'm writing my own self-indulgent fic abt that, but it involves an OC pretty heavily so idk if I should post it.
~~~
Breakfast at the guard towers... in Mystreet Laurance is canonically an amazing cook and always cooked for Dante and Garroth so... I think his mcd counterpart is in a similar situation. I think he probably makes them breakfast in the morning "most important meal of the day!" And insists that the three residents of the guard tower need to bond, and Garroth rolls his eyes, but Dante is so onboard, looking up to both of them. Garroth probably refuses to eat whatever Laurance has made cuz its a waste of time and they have things to do. And Laurance is insistant that Garroth works too damn hard and deserves a little bit of eggs and bacon in the morning. So Laurance drags Garroth to the table and starts hand feeding him breakfast, and Garroth is like "I'm not your child I can feed myself" and Laurance tells him "when was the last time you sat down and ate a full meal then?" And Garroth says nothing he just takes the fork from Laurance and Dante is like "ummm okay then!" And then they kiss or smth idk this is sweet tho <3
#laurance zvahl#aphmau#laurance#mcd#aphblr#minecraft diaries#garroth#garroth ro'meave#garrance#garrence#aphverse
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ok, now that i've watched all of tos (none of the movies yet...) i am going to do the top ten worst and best episodes, according to Me. they are as follows:
WORST EPISODES
10. the savage curtain - idk who thought putting abe lincoln in a cage match with the vulcan version of ghandi against like, ghengis khan and space hitler would be a good idea. but it wasn't. i did like seeing the vulcan father of logic though like "im gonna go sacrifice myself for peace" ok king
9. i, mudd - all of the mudd episodes are bad. he's not charming at all whatsoever. however, this one is better than the other one because uhura gets to pretend to sell out kirk and they're SOOO cute about it. her little giggle when he PICKS HER UP BY HER SHOULDERS and tells her how proud he is. PLEEEEASE
8. charlie x - the entire premise of this episode is that the bad guy is just autistic. and then they make him live on a planet without people because he can't adjust to normal life ???
7. shore leave - obvious racism of this episode aside, the faux-irish jig that played while kirk was being menaced by his extremely unfunny old bully nearly drove me over the edge. we DO love a good mccoy death fakeout tho
6. a piece of the action - if i had any interest in gangster films before this it's all gone now. that being said. i loved when kirk drove the little car. he was so bad at it. he was so happy.
5. mudd's women - like he's literally just selling women?? and the plot twist is that secretly they're ugly?????
4. who mourns for adonias - this is just "what if ALIENS build the pyramids bro" except for the 1960s. nail in the coffin for this one was kirk proudly declaring they didn't needs gods - because they already had the One God, thank you very much!
3. the paradise syndrome - WHY WOULD YOU HAVE NATIVE AMERICANS MISTAKE KIRK FOR GOD. WHY. like i know why but Why. i think the very worst part of this episode was that it had an amnesia plot that would have FUCKED if you had simply removed the people. if there hadn't been people in this it would've been in my top 10 episodes. i think this broke me.
2. the omega glory - this is the same as the last episode except there's no amnesia, and also the "native americans" are white cosplayers who worship the american flag and mistake kirk for god because he can recite the pledge of allegiance yes really. if i had a nickel for every time this happened i'd only have two nickels etc etc at least kirk didn't knock anybody up in this one ig
1. patterns of force - why would you make your two jewish leads wear swastikas and then literally be whipped by nazis. i know he's such a bad person but not even william shatner deserves that. number one worst episode everyone says it's omega glory but it's this one
BEST EPISODES
10. plato's stepchildren - this episode is hard to rank because like it's both good and bad. the torture scenes were genuinely upsetting, especially the ones at the end w/ spock & nurse chapel, because they weren't just violence being inflicted on tied up guys, but they were SUPPOSED to be upsetting, like it was literally the point. and also this episode bears the distinction of THEEE kirk & uhura kiss. literally historic.
9. the trouble with tribbles - i feel like everyone's heard of this but it really is as good as everyone says. sometimes 1960s humor doesn't translate to 2020s humor but it was genuinely hysterical start to finish. also, the distinct trilling sound was so imprinted in my brain i recognized it in the 2009 movie where i had never registered it before.
8. the naked time - aside from the KING SHIT george takei pulled with the fencing this episode also contains the "i am in control of my emotions [sobbing]" moment and kirk & spock LITERALLY having a slapfight. this episode has everything. an absolute masterpiece
7. the empath - i feel like this paired with "the world is hollow and i have touched the sky" really made me a Bones Understander. i feel a little bad about that bc everyone says the characterizations in s3, or actually that the season as a whole, is kinda shaky? but i watched without knowing that and i feel like i Get It now. also, this was the only score i went and relistened to on spotify
6. tholian web - the spock & mccoy episode ever. there's so many things to say about this from the death fakeout to kirk's little space suit but what TRULY got me was the instant and totally nonverbal agreement to lie straight to kirk's face to both preserve personal dignity and troll the shit out of him (while chekov and sulu are like also silently laughing as they listen in no less). what this episode made me realize was that it's a good thing they argue all the time and make kirk play referee because if they were on the same side kirk wouldn't stand a chance. like he'd be finished.
5. the city on the edge of forever - ok, so, this episode made me feel like i was having a mental break. the time travel. spock's little hat. when he watches kirk kiss edith and then goes back into their room to pretend he didn't see anything. mccoy and kirk basically hugging at the end when edith bites it.
4. requiem for methuselah - the first time i watched this i was kinda like :/ because how does kirk fall in love with a woman in FOUR HOURS? that aside the ending scene blew my tits clean off. i paced around my house for like 30 minutes going "what the FUCK was that" because i couldn't simply lie down and sleep after seeing it. rewatching the episode with uh. new context made me like it a little better. but even if it had been garbage the last scene shook me so thoroughly it would still need to be on this list. i'm getting wound up just thinking about it. number one most shocking tos moment.
3. the dagger of the mind - look, i understand that this episode was technically just run-of-the-mill stuff as far as everybody else is concerned but they put james t kirk in a little brainwashing machine. and the machine was shaped like a chair. and it gives people amnesia sometimes. i don't know how i'm expected to behave normally
2. this side of paradise - this is the episode where a flower jizzes on spock and gives him feelings. and look: it's really funny, and there's a lot to love about it. but the ending where kirk hurls verbal abuse at spock for a solid 92 seconds WITHOUT STOPPING followed by: spock beating the shit out of him until he gets his logic back. i have rewatched this perhaps 1,000 times at minimum. what the fuck were they doing
1. conscience of the king - this episode got me into this mess. i don't think i can elaborate further without significant self-incrimination. let's just say what happened was i thought "oh i'll just watch this one tos episode for context for the fanfiction" and one month later i'm writing fic about [redacted] [redacted] [redacted] DON'T WORRY ABOUT IT
ok, that's my list. i thought about doing honorable mentions for episodes that had scenes i liked even though the overall episode didn't make it into my top 10. but then i realized that would mean recapping basically the entire series and this post is already too long. i do have to give the pon farr episode a shoutout though because even though so much of it was offputting there was literally a titty window in kirk's shirt. like, it's the pon farr episode. ok NOW i'm done
#personal#star trek blogging#i feel like if i hadn't wanted people to dox that fic i could've been blogging about this all along#in some ways it was more fun to keep a lid on it but i will miss having a record of my live first impressions that i can relive later......#hence a list. and also a spreadsheet but i just made it for me and cathy it would be incomprehensible to the general public#if anyone wants an ACTUAL skip/watch list for tos hit me up#i'll clean up the one i have to match the spn one lol#tos lb#liz's star trek stuff#liz's meta#kinda.
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hello, sorry if this is rude, but I wanted to ask why you write Ghost the way you do?? I haven't played the games yet but I've been seeing some people debating on others writing him different ways.
Hey anon, I don't think it's rude. Now, if I understand this correct, yes, there are people who have been debating and even aggressive toward some people who write for different characters.
But I'll break down why I write Simon why I do.
First off, for those who haven't played the games and haven't looked into a character further than their sex appeal; Simon isn't heartless and rottenly cold.
He's not. Nor would he push around and hurt people who are in his circle on purpose. Going back to 2009 when Simon was shown in the og trilogy he was very close to captain MacTavish and made jokes and comments all throughout the game. While he's still very much professional, he has that balance.
It's shown, even in the new game that Simon cares deeply. One reason I think people want to think he's so cold because that's how he likes to present himself. But in the military, being particularly scary is probably favorable. That and being in the military as long as Simon or Price has, they have probably learned not to get too close to soldiers.
Since the sad part it, there's a very high chance they won't make it long.
And an intimacy issue. I've seen people getting upset because some people write Simon to flinch at every little touch. And while I think part of that has truth, Simon 100% has intimacy issues.
And this is partly me projecting into him, because Simon wouldn't be raised how he was and not have issues or extremely negative views and experiences around intimacy. And I doubt the military encouraged any different.
While I don't think he would flinch at every single thing, certain things are completely beyond his limits. I personally had a very abusive relative who always wanted hugs and I was always forced to hug her and be close to her. And since getting away I am extremely careful and particular about who hugs me.
I am uncomfortable hugging people who aren't in that selected little few, and really I'm still only 100% with hugs from my dad.
So does Simon have intimacy issues, absolutely he does. He doesn't know affection, and for someone who hasn't known a lot of a affection it can come off like a red flag or a trigger because they aren't used to it happening so in their mind; something must be wrong.
And a lot of affection can take Simon out of things. Like myself, if he's love bombed he is out of it and needs to step away because... Like what does he do? That's too much in one place at one time. Big boundaries.
But Simon is also gentle. Just because all of these things have happened to him doesn't mean he's always nasty. He's very gentle toward someone who shares an up bringing or even just a situation like he had. He's gentle with hostages and with kids when he finds them on the field. While he may not like children, he doesn't do anything to openly show that.
Touch-starved. All I need to say. When Someone like Johnny, or Reader gives Simon affection that he likes, he wants it all.
Like snuggles, when Simon comes to the realization of how much he just genuinely and innocently likes the company of a close body with warm arms wrapped around him, he wants more. He wants what they can give him. He needs to trust them though.
Simon is very closed off only until he's with those he is close with.
And yes, Simon is strong, but that does not mean he can't have mental struggles. Simon, in my world has had struggles with food because I have.
Simon can have anxiety and still be able to throw out quips and quick remarks like when johnny and him were bantering in the alone mission about his mask. He can have both.
You can be both confident in your profession and lacking confidence in another field. I see this a lot with König as well. They are both firm and know the drill and are very, very confident in their field of work because they know it.
But taken out of that head space and thrown into something casual of domestic for a bit and it completely takes them out and gives them anxiety.
Simon can be self conscious of his body and his stretch marks and still have confidence in other things.
And this is just how I personally like to write Simon. There is probably a lot more I missed but off the top of my head this is how I write him. And I enjoy writing him like this, and I'm glad others do as well.
#simon ghost riley#call of duty#call of duty headcanons#simon riley#simon ghost riley headcanons#i guess??#ask#thank you for asking
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I think the fact that Caiti agreed George's story was more accurate is what upsets me. His story doesn't paint a story of SA and that she originally agreed to it and is now adding new details makes me question it. I also can't help but see how all my friends who experienced SA feel used and hurt by the way she went about it. I hope she gets help but it's hard.
gituation discussion under the cut
I get this but if we know she didn't watch george's second statement, she probably didn't watch his first one either. I think she may have heard second hand (from a friend, twitter, etc) that he admitted to touching her, but because she didn't see the clip, she didn't know he never actually explicitly mentioned touching her breasts (and had only described waist touching and his hand moving upward) hence why she never made the clarification in her document. And since she was extremely vague with her wording in her first stream, most of us didn't realize there was breast touching either. She never agreed that it was "only waist touching thing" because she never described the touching in detail (aside from saying it was under her shirt and sexual) until her recent stream.
I think both george and caiti's previous statements alluded to breast touching looking back. george even said he didn't want to discuss it further out of respect for her privacy which to me implies it went farther than just a hand on her waist moving upwards. I don't think its fair of anyone to accuse her of lying about something as serious as this when it does line up with what was said in previous statements, it's just not a fair judgement to make.
I understand being upset at her vague wording and lack of specifics in the beginning, but him touching her breasts (in my opinion) without explicit consent is a LOT more severe to me than just a hand on the waist. And I think this new bit of information serves as a much better explanation for her reaction, intense emotions and the way she went about it and really puts everything into perspective for me. I still think making this public wasn't a good decision for reasons I've already went on about, and I wish she had been more specific about what happened in her original statement but I don't think she's trying to "change her story" or add new details. I think she may have genuinely thought that her vague comments in her original stream were enough to get the point across that he touched her chest, but it wasnt and it caused this miscommunication between her and the viewers.
I just feel sorry for her because a lot of people (myself included) were forming our opinions on this based on it being just waist touching, and ofc thats not sexual assault and so a lot of people (ex: commentary youtubers) were being quite harsh on her for misusing such heavy language over non sexual touching. But looking back I dont think she ever meant for us to think it was just waist touching. There was just miscommunication between her and the audience due to her vague language and george never explicitly mentioning it in his streams.
anyways my tldr is that i just think its really unfair to accuse her of being untruthful about the breast touching, especially considering the language used by both parties in previous statements. I'm not gonna tell you how to feel about it because thats up to your own judgement, and I'll be honest I dont even know how I feel about it, but I do think it's far more likely than not that it did happen and I wish we didnt just immediately jump to deny this or accuse her of lying. Just as we shouldn’t blindly believe and trust that every accusation is true, we also shouldn’t make the automatic assumption that someone is lying especially when there is reason to believe they are telling the truth.
#is it gituation I forgot which one we’re using#this isn’t a ganti post don’t take it that way this is just my thoughts on the legitimacy of her claims#asks
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Little Announcement
So... My health is still pretty rough. In needing to meet my own physical and mental needs, I'm going to be pulling a bit of a "Disney" and cancelling my fic---or at least what I was thinking of for "Season 2" as I called it.
I fully intend to finish the Nightmare Saga since it's just a few chapters away from being done, but I will tweak it to give it a bit more of a satisfying ending with some of the set up I have laid down that was meant for S2.
If it puts any of you at ease, most of S2 was not really going to be terribly MetaGala-heavy anyway and just tackled the games I didn't touch as of yet. While it'll be unfortunate to miss out on RtDL, Allies, and FL (among other 'smaller' games,) they ultimately didn't really add much to the boys and their story. It was mostly just seeing Kirby grow up and having the adults effectively supervising/guiding him around heavier moments like Magolor's betrayal, Hyness' treatment and seeing Void Termina make a return to the world, and obviously Elfilis and what happened with him among Galacta's true past and purpose with Morpho.
I plan to add a small epilogue that reveals a few things I was planning to have, including Galacta and Meta's parents (their mothers are alive,) and other little tidbits I was looking forward to writing, but very brief. I can't keep up with this project and for what I've done... I mean. 70 chapters, pretty lengthy ones at that too. Not too shabby.
But I do need to focus on myself and writing does take a lot out of me, sadly. As much as I like my silly little world, I do need to move onto other stuff too. Focus on my health more intensely, have fun in other things I love too. I hope it's not too upsetting for anyone, but I plan for the last few chapters I write to go out with a big bang to celebrate getting this far despite it all.
Once it all ends, I am very open to getting any asks wanting elaboration, headcanons, or even original plans. Ultimately the only game that would really bring any real particular note for Meta and Gala would be FL but by then it would be mostly Kirby's show as a young teen and dealing with what Morpho has in store for them all after dealing with Elfilin and his baggage as Elfilis.
I want to thank you all for sticking by me while I made this little thing. I never expected so many to love it. It makes me so happy to bring even a tiny bit of joy to your lives, but the curtain has to close eventually, and I do need to stop the show before I break something that I might not be able to fix.
#ASMR Chitter Chatter#I'm not leaving the fandom by any means but more shifting back into a more casual enjoyer to ease things on my end#I just want to be able to finish and relax now since I'm again not the healthiest sort#I'm still waiting for more tests and it's not looking too great in being able to repair anything#It's a pretty high chance I just have to live like this and I only have so much energy in me anymore with how little I can do#I want my fic to go out with a beautiful bang rather than fizzle and fade like a hacked cough#I owe the characters that much for helping me through this#A friend suggested I could do one-shots from time to time and that's a maybe if I feel the spark for it
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The Blessing of No Longer Relasping
TW: very vulnerable, includes discussion of dr*gs, su1c1de, s3lf h4rm, etc
Today I woke up and everything was going fine until my morning was ruined because I couldn't find my key on my purse which is where I always put it. This pissed me completely off for 3 main reasons:
1. I hate hearing my mom fuss and give me the irresponsibility speech
2. I ALWAYS am 99.9% aware of where my things are and if not then it's placed in the last place I know I put it at which I didn't see it at
3. My siblings are the reason I know my key wasn't there
How my set my personal belongings I try putting it in a way where it can't be touched, unfourtanetly my siblings always find a way to ruin that which is why I've been dying for my own fucking room. This weekend they had continuously kept dropping mythings and at some point I got tired of it and told them they need to pick up my things themselves, this alone pissed me off even more because when I checked my things stuff was still on the floor that was for me. As I was trying to find my key this morning mind you I have to be at school at a certain time as well I couldn't even find it and when I asked my siblings to help me because I know in my gut they're the reason why it wasn't there, for one they were barely looking and secondly they sat up there looking in the places I knew it wasn't at..(my little sister for example sees me looking in my purse and sits up there walk towards me trying to look in my purse to see if it's there I MEAN WTF BRO😑🤬)
So now I'm sitting in class trying to figure out how I'm about to tell my mom I don't have my key without telling her and play it off. Honestly this whole thing upsets me and really sets me off causing me stress. I had came to school ans my thoughts were pretty rampant but after a long while eventually I calm down...well at least my thoughts weren't so rampant. Normally I would've tried doing something to harm myself or fill my mind up with the many MANY ways I would've wanted to either get revenge or harm myself or 0verd0se of dr*gs just to feel better especially because I'm holding back a ton of tears right now. This is sensitive and so stressful for me because I do have OCD and I'm prone to high levels of stress especially especially when I become compulsive.
This time around I didn't do anything out of character. I didn't plunge myself up in a dark place and drown myself in my own rage and impulse shoving myself down with anything harmful i could find just to feel better like I normally would've done. The worst part is with all this I was gonna blame myself for even allowing this entire situation to happen this way. I say all this to say to anyone who does have issues with relapsing and going back to there old self h4rming tendencies that it is ok...you don't have to be a slave to your darker traits. It's a blessing I didn't drown myself in my compulsive nature and self aimed harm. Just like for those who have been going strong on sobriety and are recovering from your own self h4rm tendencies I want you to know I'm so proud of you..that's something I wish I could hear in times like this where the world we live in currently quite literally anything could trigger me and people like me.
To those who are still here holding strong just know we both made it this far and we're gonna make it even farther..to those who are on their verge of end and feel they are ready to clock out and unsubcribe from what feels like hell right now...I cant control your choices and decisions but if you have any little feeling left at all in you please understand that you don't have to be a slave to yourself anymore. I know you wanna let it all go and not deal with any of these things anymore, but know there is always a choice even when you can't see them. You always have a choice to finally take control even if it seems like you can't. Take it from me when I say that it is out of our control to see how others will do us and the circumstances we go through but it is in our control how we handle them and how we choose to let them affect us. To those who feel like no one ever listens know that you're always being heard..from someone much higher than any of us, who you believe that to be is your choice. There's a reason you're still here even if you can't see it yet or even understand, you're not gonna understand now but you will one day which makes this all the more valuable.
You are loved, you are safe, you're protected, you ARE enough and always will be..
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i wanna say, you've made me enjoy the heroes ocs WAY MORE with your stuff!!! triandra and alfonse in particular r reaching blorbo tier for me... what made you like them? did you like the story out of the gate, or was there a specific moment that made it snap into place?
for me, i was rather neutral on it until book 3 hit all the tropes i like (big news: grima fan also likes lif, how suprising), but after that i needed to simmer on a lot of it to see its depth.
also your art is super cute.
I AM. SO DEEPLY HONORED TO HEAR THIS LMFAOOOO that's so fucking funny and cool 😭🥺 (also THANK YOU!!!!! 😊)
I've def been ruminating on this one! Triandra is a lot easier to place an exact timeline on her.
I have extreme Alfonse autism, he IS my primary fixation I think LMFAO 😅 And I think what happened was like. Alfonse autism spreads like mold to characters that are connected to/significant to him -- so, I ended up having (intense!) Sharena autism as well, and THAT spread to Peony of course (less intense, but her connection to Sharena is Huge and can't be overlooked), which spreads to Triandra. Triandra was also significant in the back of my mind, since she would be in the exact same situation as Alfonse when it comes to their sisters potentially being swapped, just on the other side of it. Which I think is SUCH an intriguing premise that hasn't been explored in canon at all.
I think I doubled down on it more when I decided to impulse summon for her bunny alt for Sharena autism reasons and got her -- at this point, I didn't have Triandra's base form (just the Peony duo!). Having her as a stand-alone unit helped me flesh out her vibe/character way more! WHICH ALSO was important cause like. I did completely forget her backstory. I blocked out most of Book 4 actually LMFAOO IT WAS SO UPSETTING FOR ME 😭 And the fairy who left the deepest impression on me was Plumeria, actually.
So! My deep-dive exploration of the fairies has been way more recent! All that, combined with one Book 4 revisit and the dream realm centric TT event that excluded Sharena kind of just. Fueled my spite LMFAOO like okay FINE. I'll reconcile all of this myself if I have to 😤
As for Alfonse... man.
It's hard to say which came first, my affinity for Alfonse or the intrigue of Lif. I almost want to say they happened side by side, parallel to each other. I got into FEH a couple years after it launched, so I was able to go through Books 1, 2, and most of 3 at my own pace. I think my affection for Alfonse WAS solidified in Book 3 though, not even because of Lif.
THIS IS. THE VERY FIRST PHOTO IN MY DEDICATED ALFONSE ALBUM ON MY PHONE LMFAOOOOOOO IT'S NOT EVEN OF ALFONSE........ IT'S HIS BITCH ASS DAD 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 I thought this moment was SO insanely funny though like MAN. Real "Sometimes I can still hear his voice...." "Stop telling everyone that I'm dead" moment 😰
Though Gustav does NOT get credit for anything.
This dialogue especially in response to Gustav really did touch me. Like for him to go from trying his damnest to remain detached to standing up to his dad (scary) for someone he only recently met. To believe in the strength of that connection ESPECIALLY in the face of conflict (his own fears, and his bitchass dad) (and also the death curse.) To be THAT important, to have that much faith in me. Damn I guess I have to trust you and let you into my heart. 🧍
And prior to that moment, like... I absolutely had a slow burn with him.
Idk how personal I want to get about it esp cause I've rambled SO much already lmfao... but for me, Alfonse is very much like looking into a distorted mirror. Some things are extremely similar, other things are direct opposites but in a way that reflects the other. He's very much like me. He's something I'm not, and something I can never be. Sometimes that's good. Sometimes he has something I wish I could grasp for myself. There's feelings of affection, recognition, admiration, hostility, envy, desire.
Maybe one thing I'm comfortable sharing is that I have a lot of trouble letting people in. I kind of go about it in the complete opposite way. Everything I know about connecting with others, I've had to go out of my way to learn. None of it came naturally to me. I am very intentional, almost meticulous, in what I do and say. To be likable, to be the best person I can be. I've had to work really hard, and I still have to work hard to not push people away or isolate myself completely.
In short PVP was activated when I got a sense for his character LMFAOO LIKE COME ON MAN. I've done XYZ and A THOUSAND OTHER THINGS. I may not show it but AAAUAGJGHGHGH EVERYTHING IS SO HARD ALL THE TIME BUT I AM FACING MY FEARS EVERY DAY. To be A CHILL and FUN super laid back guy who also helps the best he can whenever he can however he can. And you???? What about you?????? What are YOU doing?!???!?? I'M GONNA FUCKING KILL YOU
#ask answered!#THERE'S. SO MUCH. about alfonse fire emblem. for me.#also i DO think the grima enjoyer/lif enjoyer overlap is so funny. LIKE YEAH.... I SEE THE CONNETION....... 👁️👁️#i think grima has grown on me too!#thanks to a handful of tumblr users 😊#PEACE AND LOVE........#fe alfonse#fe triandra
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Hey like I'm sorry bad things happened to you but these aren't all universal experiences. Girlhood is absolutely not about molestation and abuse. Girlhood isn't about anything other than growing from an infant into an adult, and I don't feel there needs to be any special significance attached. If you were hurt during that time, it's not because "that's what Girlhood is", it's because unfortunately you crossed paths with people willing to do you harm.
Many women, myself included, have never had an issue with being cat called. Even then, this isn't violence.
This is called puberty. I would go as far as saying bleeding through your pants is something every woman on the planet has experienced at least once. This is not violence— it's growing up.
Breast pain during development comes from the fact your breasts are developing. Are you really not familiar with the colloqialism "growing pains"? I promise a teenage boy who is also going through puberty and experiencing all the discomfort and pain that comes with it.is not sending brainwaves that make your boobs hurt.
Girls can and do assault boys in the hallway. A lot of my male friends have stories of being groped or touched inappropriately, as do many of my female friends. I also have friends that have been assaulted by their same sex. This is not a 'women's only' issue.
Also not a universal experience. I have never had a 'rape talk', nor has anyone I've known, even friends of mine that have actually been raped.
What does 'girlhood is invasive' even mean? Are you doing the encroaching, or are you being encroached upon? Is it the mere concept of being a child?
You are not obligated to use tampons, alternate methods exist (pads, period underwear, diva cups, etc). I'm assuming by 'fingers' you are leaning into being sexually assaulted (which again is not an inherent part of being a young girl)? People are going to make comments that make you uncomfortable or upset you, and not all of them are going to be sexual. Self advocate, enforce boundaries, and avoid people that make you uncomfortable.
This isn't part of 'girlhood', this is a symptom of trauma.
There really isn't an easy way to tackle this, because a situation like this has so many moving parts and missing context and there are a million and one different ways this could turn out with one or both parties being in the wrong. However proper sexual education and classes on things like birth control, consent, and self advocacy would solve so many of these cases.
Again, men can and have been also touched and groped inappropriately without their consent. Speculums and doctor's offices are part of being a healthy person. Your obgyn using a speculum during any number of procedures isn't for their own sick sense of pleasure, it's because it is a tool designed to make treatment easier.
This feels like demonizing medical care. I had extremely heavy cycles. It was almost guaranteed I was going to have an iron deficiency each month. I got cysts. Birth control was an option presented to me (that I originally denied, mind you) that I was allowed to choose or not choose. Ultimately birth control has been one of the best decisions I have ever made for my health. If it's not something you want, you don't have to take it. If it doesn't work for you, you don't have to keep taking it. You are not obligated to take any medicine or treatment you don't want to.
Girlhood is a period of time during which you grow up, nothing more.
Girlhood is a period of time during which you grow up, nothing more.
If trans women feel joy in expressing femininity and find happiness in feminine things, then by God I hope they find the spinniest skirt available and spin until they can't stand anymore. I hope they feel comfortable and safe as their most authentic selves.
Stop demonizing growing up. Stop pretending that being a little girl is inherently traumatic. Stop dramatizing being young. This is real life, not a season of Degrassi or Pretty Little Liars or whatever other youth drama.
#baph bleats#for clarity i know the original tweet was about Dylan#and fwiw i dont agree with a lot of the shit she's doing but if this is how she chooses to document her transition then sure#does she do stupid shit online? yeah. who fuckin doesnt#she's on tiktok ffs of course shes gonna do dumb shit and exaggerate#its literally the dumb shit and exaggeration app#what radical feminism does to a motherfucker#radfems shut the fuck up challenge#radfems literally be like 'bigotry is ok when i do it because i must eternally be the victim'#radfems stop pretending all women are hapless victims challenge
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Incorrect Quotes pt. 18: One-Liner Edition
SMG4: I'm feeling it! What am I feeling? Death, probably.
Saiko: Now, the recipe calls for 2 shots of vodka.
Saiko: upends the bottle
Melony: I like to play this game called nap roulette. I take a nap and don’t set an alarm. Will it be 20 min or 4 hours? Nobody knows. It’s risky and I like it.
Tari: Real life should have a fucking search function, or something.
Tari: I need my socks.
Bob: God has let me live another day and I'm going to make it everyone's problem.
SMG3: I've never encountered a problem that can't be solved by a spontaneous musical number.
Swag: Some people say that I have a god complex. I’d like to think that I’m a complex god.
Melony: I just found out that humans are capable of fitting a light bulb into their mouth with ease but can’t take it out without shattering it, and now I have to physically restrain myself from putting a light bulb in my mouth
Tari: Caw caw, motherfuckers.
Meggy: Do you know that we are made out of atoms?
Meggy: And atoms never touch each other.
Meggy: So in my defense, officer. I did not punch this kid.
SMG3: All of your existences are confusing.
The Squad: How so?
SMG3: Your presence is annoying, but the thought of anything bad happening to any of you upsets me.
Mario: The waiter at Olive Garden has been grating my cheese for 6 hours now, waiting for me to say when. Customers are screaming. Three people have died.
Mario: I will not yield.
#long ass post i'm sorry#you can tell who my favorites are-#smg4#smg4 saiko#smg4 melony#smg4 tari#smg4 bob#smg3#smg4 swag#smg4 meggy#smg4 mario#SnowedQuotes#incorrect quotes
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dodie Songs that Would Describe a Relationship with Angus MacGyver - Angus MacGyver Imagine [MacGyver (2016)]
Title: dodie Songs that Would Describe a Relationship with Angus MacGyver
Pairing: Angus MacGyver X Reader
Word Count: 1,130 words
Warning(s): mentions of insecurity/fears
Author's Note: I've got two of these planned and I am really excited about the second one.
**Not intentionally written in chronological order**
---------------------------
Intertwined
Oh you
And I
Safe from the world
Though the world will try
I had to get used to waking up to another person next to me.
Waking up next to Mac was nice, I just couldn't help but be a little confused when there was just another body next to me. Like when you're a kid and go to a sleepover at a friend's house and wake up trying to figure out where you are.
I woke up to Mac's arms wrapped around me, his face tucked into the crook of my neck, and our legs intertwined. Any plan that I had to get up went out the window as soon as I was awake enough to form a proper thought.
I ran my hand along his arm as my eyes shut again.
It was rare that I ever felt so comfortable. It was like for just a little while, there was nothing to worry about. No potential missions or danger. It was just Mac and me. Together and comfortable.
I only opened my eyes again when there was a kiss pressed to the skin of my neck.
"Morning," Mac muttered into my ear.
I moved away enough to turn over in his arms. "Morning."
He had this tired grin on his face that almost made me chuckle. He was so clearly half-asleep. I leaned forward and pecked his lips. He hummed a bit before moving to kiss me again.
"Mac," I laughed into the kiss as he just leaned closer to me. He was basically laying on me by the time he pulled away.
I managed to stop my laughter and cupped the side of his face. He leaned into my touch, his grin just growing as he did.
"I could spend forever like this," I said. "With you. It's just so... nice. Safe. Perfect."
"Why can't we?"
I scoffed. "Matty would probably be a little upset."
"Well... one sick day wouldn't hurt..."
He leaned down and brush his lips along my neck. I chuckled, my arms wrapping around his shoulders.
I ran one hand up through his hair. "That's a very good idea, MacGyver."
If I'm Being Honest
Could you love this? Will this one be right?
Well if I'm being honest, I'm hoping it might
Could you love this? Did you plan to fall?
Well if I'm being honest, oh I bet it's not that at all
When I first developed feelings for Mac, I assumed that nothing would ever happen between us.
Our friendship never went beyond playful flirting at times.
Every now and then there would be these small moments. Comments that wouldn't quite land as jokes. Pauses where we seemed to be leaning toward something. Touches or hugs that went on longer than they should've.
Those were times when I entertained the idea. I considered what could be.
I assumed that I was just seeing signs where there were none.
And then, I got hurt during a mission.
"(Y/n)!"
I looked up from the ground just as Mac pulled me into the hug. I flinched a little as he brushed a fresh hit that was probably going to start bruising in a little while.
"Are you okay," he asked, stepping back. I nodded. He cupped the side of my face. "You... I... I couldn't find you and none of us could hear you and I thought-"
"Mac," I reached up and touched his hand. "I'm okay. See?"
He nodded, eyes still scanning every part of my face.
I went to step back, but he leaned forward before I could. He pressed his lips to mine. I froze for a while. I had convinced myself that this would never happen. Now that it was, what was I supposed to do?
"Sorry," he mumbled, leaning his forehead on mine.
"It's... It's okay," I replied. He grinned at me.
I leaned in and kissed him again. It was only a few seconds before I pulled away. His grin turned into a proper smile.
"We should get back to the team," I said awkwardly.
He nodded, "Yeah, good idea."
"That... That was very nice, by the way."
"I thought so too."
I nodded and went to walk back in the direction he came from. He fell into step with me and grabbed my hand. I looked down at our hands for a moment before grinning and looking forward again.
It was the only time that I had been happy to be wrong.
Ready Now
You saw through me all this time
I'd forgotten people are kind
I was hurting and you knew
So you showed me what to do
You said "I will listen, tell it all
When you're finished we'll talk more"
We were sitting out on the patio. A fire was going with a blanket drawn up over our legs. I had my legs hooked over his and my head was on his shoulder. His arm was wrapped around me.
Mac usually had trouble keeping his hands still. Even in quiet moments like this, he would be doing something. He usually would tap some rhythm into my side or draw shapes into my skin. I was concerned when he was completely still.
"Are you okay," I asked.
He hummed, seeming to suddenly snap out of his thoughts.
"Are you okay," I repeated.
"Yeah, fine."
His tone made me sit up completely and look at him. He saw the look on my face and rolled his eyes.
"I'm fine," he insisted.
"Mac," I said. He looked away from me for a moment. "I can't force you to tell me anything, but if there is something that you need to talk about, then please don't feel the need to hide it. I... We're in a relationship now. I'm here to support you."
He opened his mouth again, probably ready to deny that anything was wrong for a moment. Something stopped him when he looked back at me.
"It was just this last trip," he finally admitted. "I feel like I keep getting everyone almost killed."
I adjusted in my spot. "You saved our asses."
"From a situation that I led us into."
"Mac, no, you didn't."
We spent the whole night sitting out there. I spent most of the night listening to him explain what had been going through his mind. A spiral of thoughts with little guidance. It felt good. To have that conversation. Not because it didn't hurt. But because it needed to happen.
I reached over and ran my hand through his hair after the conversation finally started trailing off.
"Thank you," he muttered, grinning at me.
"Nothing to thank me for," I replied. "I love you."
"I love you too."
Our next step forward was going to be better. So much better.
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