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neet-elite · 3 months

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Without Shame — (SDV) Sebastian

Pairing: Stepbro!Sebastian / F!Reader Genre: Smut 18+ WC: 7,617 Warnings: Stepbro!Sebastian, pseudoincest, stepcest, cheating, dubcon, magic pocket pussy, mean Sebastian, name calling (dummy, little sister, baby sister), cunnilingus, accidental creampie, objectification, ruined orgasm, fingering Synopsis: More than anything he refers to you only as brat, because that’s what you are. An annoying, good for nothing, stupid little brat who needs to be put in her place. Particularly considering that you’ve never been told no before; maybe that’s why you bug him so often, because he’s not afraid to say what you hate most.

No, you can’t have that. No, that’s mine. No, I’m not staring at your ass.

A/N: Should I make this a series? I have several more thoughts that didn't make it into this fic... Let me know if you wanna read more! Anyway I had fun with this! I've wanted to do something like this piece for a while but was convinced everyone would hate it LOL... But my friends reassured me so thank you guys <3

Ever since he can recall, you’ve been a fucking brat. There’s no other way to put it quite so eloquently, he thinks. At least when it comes to interacting with him, which makes it all the more frustrating when you play innocent with others. Has him feeling insane when no one believes his claims that you’re evil, that he’d really rather be alone than stuck with you as a sibling, that everyone else is wrong when they call him the mean one. You play the role of innocent little sister well in public, and though part of him is genuinely impressed at your acting skills, he unfortunately knows the real you; and you’re so fucking annoying. Especially the way that you know exactly how to get away with your mistreatment of him, remaining undetected the moment a third party shows up so that he has to take the blame. Every. Single. Time.

Which is unfair, right? Unlike his usual sedentary lifestyle, the one constant that he can always count on in life is that you’ll surely be there to cause chaos for him. Whether that be from your ‘playful’ comments about his appearance, making fun of his lifestyle choices and hobbies, or the fact that you’re quite literally dating his best friend; it’s fair to say that you’ve always annoyed him. Siblings fight, sure, but he’s never called you anything close to sister in his life, and he doesn’t plan on it. He didn’t grow up with you so much as you just showed up one day to ruin his life, strutting around like you already owned the place with that dumb smirk he so often sees you wear, in spite of the fact that you moved into his home. More than anything he refers to you only as brat, because that’s what you are. An annoying, good for nothing, stupid little brat who needs to be put in her place. Particularly considering that you’ve never been told no before; maybe that’s why you bug him so often, because he’s not afraid to say what you hate most.

No, you can’t have that. No, that’s mine. No, I’m not staring at your ass.

What’s worse is that he can’t even hide how much you get to him, retaliating to your attacks with barks of his own every time, too afraid that if he doesn’t keep if with you that you’ll only bully him more. And it’s exhausting watching you prance around the house, usually in next to no clothing, teasing him at the dinner table with your nipples poking through your shirt—no bra again, despite his begs for you to wear one—until he eventually snaps at you to shut up; and then it’s him that gets punished for it!

Unfair is to word that suits you best. How you treat him, and how he feels about you. Because at the end of the day, he’s just a man. A man with a stupidly annoying hot step sister who provokes him day in and day out, teasing his perverted mind with just barely not enough; because you’re mean and you fucking know it.

Tonight, he decides to change that.

For all the pranks you’ve had him endure, he’s got his own devious plan up his sleeve. Been sitting on it for a few nights, a pure fantasy that even now he barely thinks is even possible, prepared for it to all be a scam, but fuck it. He has to try. Anything to wipe that stupid smile off your cute face, regardless of morals. And you only have yourself to blame, your dumb… Hot self. Fuck he hates you. Hates the way his cock twitches every time you enter his room, even if he knows you’re only there to upset him. Hates the way his heart hurts when you show him your recent selfies with Sam, how his tummy turns when you only give up on teasing him because Sam is calling you, a thick layer of bile always on the tip of his tongue waiting to put you down. It’s disgusting, the way he actually loves it.

He especially hates the cute little pout you wear when he does bites back, mimicking your words in a high pitched mocking tone just to hear you whine some more, standing tall above you only to talk down at you. God, it makes him so hard just thinking about your teary eyes when he takes it a step too far, commenting on that one thing he knows you’re actually insecure about and big fat tears travel down your chubby cheeks. So fucking hot making you sob for him, turning your otherwise pretty smile into an earnest scowl, like you hate him. It’s what you deserve for being such an annoying fucking brat. If he can’t have you be nice for him, he’ll take punishing you into tears happily. He doesn’t care too much either way, because you’re pretty when you cry too.

And it’s not that he doesn’t feel guilt for looking at you with a lecherous gaze, but rather that he simply doesn’t care. Knowing that it’s wrong and yet still he gives in to his perverted nature by stroking his cock to thoughts of you, of shutting you up by filling your throat, driven by the seed of shame taking root in his tummy to pet his erection under his desk every time you moan for him to stop teasing. It’s the only thing that helps, to balm the pangs of remorse when a smirk tugs at his lips every time you cry wolf.

Which brings him to the item in his hands, spurred on to get back at you after you recently attempted to go into deep detail about your oh so fun little date with Sam the other day. It’s bad enough that you went against his wishes and started dating Sam in the first place—he has some choice words for his best friend too—but you make things worse by indulging. Elaborating on what you love most about Sam, teasing intimate details that he’d rather not hear about; and acting oblivious to his glares. You know damn well how to rile him up just right, to get him on the edge of fighting back before retreating to the safety of your room, or worse, your father. No, he doesn't want to hear about how Sam took you home after your date last night, or about how rough his hands are on your plush thighs. It’s gross, because deep down he wishes it was him.

You should be thankful, really, that he’s going to such lengths to prank you. Only you would have him acting this desperate, squeezing the soft silicone toy in his shaking fists like a stress toy, his ass perched right on the edge of his computer chair as if it were the only barrier left before the point of no return. It was through the old man camping near his house that clued him in to the supposed wizard occupying the tower in Cindersap Forest, a claim that he initially passed off as a farce, but after your latest stunt of divulging disgusting details he decided it couldn’t hurt to ask for more information, just to amuse himself. A little fantasy of getting back at you, nothing more. Though, now that he’s got the supposed magical object in hand, he can’t help but bounce his leg off his old squeaky floor, giddy excitement resting heavy in his chest as he gives the rubber toy another squeeze, already panting at the thought of executing his plan. Fuckin’ brat, he smiles to himself. Only gettin’ what’s comin’ t’ya.

It’s the first time he’s getting a proper look at the toy too, unable to give it a second thought until right now thanks to you. Your petulant attitude when he arrived home only irked him, solidified his decision to defile you tonight even more so when you taunted him about leaving the house and how he never usually does and was he seeing a girl? A friend? Must have been really important if he left his room, right? God, even just thinking about your teasing voice causes his brows to furrow in frustration, tongue clicking at the mere memory of your pestering, gripping the girth of the toy in his hands as if it were your throat.

Selfish desire gets the better of him though, and for as much fun as it is pretending to choke you out, it’s getting late and his mom will be back with your dad soon. Which means he hasn’t got much time left to ruin you, so, he carefully holds the toy up to his face for inspection. What greets him is all pink and pretty, his throat immediately drying when he realises just how attractive it is. Then, quickly, upset crawls up to his tongue and hides behind his teeth when recalling how the wizard called it a replica, and knowing that your cunt is apparently this pretty for real angers him. Like, how dare you be withholding such a pretty pussy from your big brother, right? Shouldn’t he get first dibs on it, and not Sam. Suddenly, calling you sister sounds appealing to him, and he’s almost tempted to pull his pants down and shove his already throbbing erection into your little unprepared pretty pussy just to punish you for keeping this cunt out his reach. But he’s too busy instinctively pressing the pocket pussy against his face as close as he can get without actually touching it and huffing. Sniffing along your faux slit and immediately leaning back into his chair as your scent washes over him, overwhelming and clouding his judgement. Fuck, okay, maybe it really is linked to your cunt. And because he's not as mean as you like to portray him, he decides to indulge himself a little. Or, he's simply too selfish not to eat you out, eager to get a first taste of his little sister, to see if she's really worth all the hassle.

And he’s so close too, God; about as close to actually fucking you as he can get right now that he’s honestly a bit dizzy, jutting his hips forward so his bulge can roll against the air in a mimicked action of sex. It’s instinctual, convincing his quickly emptying mind that this must mean that it’s right, that your cunt belongs to your mean big brother, his breath fanning across the faux lips in rushed bursts of barely there restraint. He wonders if you can feel him already, wearing a cute confused pout at the cooling feeling between your legs; fuck, he can unfortunately imagine it perfectly, his free hand coming down to pet at his pulsing cock with light touch, just barely there to tease him like he’s teasing you. Because this is better than he ever thought it’d be, having all the benefit of your hole right in front of him without needing to put up with... Well, you, and he’s afraid that if he gives in to his more baser instincts too soon; he’ll cum before he gets to have his fun.

Inhaling your scent some more causes his eyes to roll to the back of his skull, imagining how quiet you must be in your room all alone; even there you usually talk too much, way too fucking loud and annoying. Is his sniffing shutting you up? Cock dripping precum already at the image of you shooting upright in bed, forgetting all about what you were previously doing because something is happening to your body, left completely unaware that your mean older brother has his face practically buried between your legs right now. That’d for sure leave you gasping, right? Make you all squirmy and cute, soft and pliable for once in your fucking life.

And thanks to his depraved mind, his tongue automatically pokes out at the thought of you listening to him for once, kitten licking at the fake slit while he holds his breath. A natural action, one that he isn’t immediately aware he’s doing before he can feel soft skin against his teeth. His mind is slow to catch up to whats happening, too distracted by the palm circling his perverted bulge into submission, but when he realises that his lips are in contact with the pocket pussy, he rolls his tongue up to the swell of it, sighing against the slit in satisfaction over how you taste so perfect. The more he teases his tongue between your folds the wetter he finds the fake cunt getting, and noticing that the magic imbued in the object is real causes his hips to jerk up into his open palm, rolling together in tandem with how he licks your cunt.

A soft curse escapes him when a gush of slick reaches his taste buds, immediately swallowing your liquid down like a dog. One hand holding the pocket pussy to his lips, the other tugging at his leaking cock. “Big brother making you feel good?” He whispers against it, only proving to rile himself up further at the verbal admission of touching his little sister so inappropriately. And he's so soft and tender with his tongue too, a momentary lapse in judgement, forgetting all about your brattiness the moment his lips grazed your puffy cunt, hypnotised by the taste and smell of your tiny hole into providing kindness to you. Pussydrunk. It causes his cock to flex under his touch, dribbling saliva onto the toy to make his tongue glide easier between your lips. “Dummy…” He sighs into you, giving your cunt a trail of kisses from top to bottom, and then back up again, letting his tongue poke out between kisses as if he were making out with your cunt more than anything. Really making out with it, sloppy sounds included with how eagerly he smacks his lips against you, the accumulation of saliva sticking to his chin as he presses kiss after lick at your hole. He shifts around on his chair, sliding down it just a little more to get comfortable and pushing it out away from his desk, his legs automatically opening while he slobbers all over the faux cunt, pretending that you’re riding his face right now because fuck that’s so fucking hot, yeah? Need big brother to eat you out and make your cunt feel all better? “Gettin’ all wet an’ slick for big brother? Preparin’ for his cock?” he continues talking to himself, voice hushed and mocking before diving back in to kiss the toy, easily believing that you’re in the room with him from the way your slick dribbles down his throat. Linked to you in your room, fuuuck he wants to see your face so bad. Wants to hear your little hushed gasps and moans, clinging on to him for assistance without realising that it’s him that’s making you feel all funny. You just need big bro to take care of you, right? Need big bro to help make you feel all better, to work out why you feel all funny down there, yeah? There’s no need to be with Sam baby, big brother is just downstairs and more than willing to help your wet little cunt out.

A rough cough crawls up his throat as he pulls away for some air, a string of saliva keeping his tongue connected to your hole. It doesn’t last very long though because he’s diving right back in before he even fills his lungs, gripping at his cock and shaking it a few times before attempting to jerk himself off, but his jeans are too tight and he’s too drunk on your cunt to pull his pants down. Too busy with flattening his tongue against your wet little slit, slurping and groaning against your cunt while he gets off to just your taste, fuck, can practically smell how much you need him by now, pressing sloppy kisses against your puffy little clit and tonguing at it desperately, humming with his kisses so that you can feel how much he appreciates your compliance: even if it’s robbed. “Pretty princess cunt,” He rasps to himself, dipping his tongue all the way down to your hole so that he can absentmindedly mouth at it, slipping inside with such ease as more slick gushes on his lips, making his fist tighten unfairly on his erection. He’s downright desperate. “Baby sister cunt—” He huffs roughly, tugging his cock only twice more before frustration overwhelms him and he’s reminded of your bratty attitude, placing the pocket pussy on the edge of his desk for you to drip slick onto his floor while his hands busy themselves with removing his pants and underwear as quickly as possible, only managing to get them over his knees before he settles back into his chair again, pocket pussy carelessly gripped and hovering dangerously close over his now exposed pulsing cock. He’s absolutely trembling, shaking with excitement while the faux cunt dribbles slick onto his already wet with precum cock, coating it in all your baby sister cream like a good girl for once. While he could eat you out literally all day if he wanted to, face stuffed between your thighs for him to huff and kiss at mindlessly, insisting on continuing when you inevitably dig your nails into his hair and try to yank him off; his cock cries for attention. Twitches as fat globs of precum roll down to his balls, veins popping with impulsive need. He briefly wonders if Sam has ever gotten you this wet before, to the point of gushing over his cock before even entering. Does big brothers tongue feel that good, baby?

Small haah’s are all he can let out as he squeezes the rubber toy in his fist, his other hand clenching tightly around the base of his perverted cock to angle it towards your sopping hole, staring at how your slick that leaks down to his tip shimmers in the seedy lighting of his room, where it connects to his own fat beads of precum that spill for you. So close, he pants to himself. Wanna fuck you so bad, he almost whines, for so long. Stuck between ramming big brothers cock into your tiny little hole already, or to savour the moment for how monumental it feels. Sure, it’s not the real deal, but it’s close enough; even more depraved if he really thinks about it. Fucking you in secret, leaving you a mess all alone in your room; able to feel his girth but left unknowing as to why: he can’t fucking wait to bully you back some, make you feel how fat his cock is as punishment for tormenting him all this time.

And that’s all it takes, the promise of revenge. The torturous drip of your cunt onto his cock convincing him to enter, inviting him, even, his fist lifting only to smear the combination of his pre and your slick over his hot and heavy length (as if it needed extra coating). He wets his lips in focus, lowering the pocket pussy closer to his red hot tip before some more pre spills for you, and as if that wasn't enough, he leans over himself to spit on his cock for extra lubrication. Don’t say he’s never kind to you, all right? “S’all your fault.” He chokes out, lowering the toy until the faux lips come into contact with his tip, automatically causing his hips to buck up into the soft feeling in search of more; but he forces himself to resist. Wait, he tells himself, nonchalantly stroking the pocket pussy lips up and down his cock instead of entering, staining himself completely with your slick. Feels so good, fuck, even just rubbing one out on you like this, pushing the fat of his cock between the fake lips to really hump at, y’know? Even lets his hip thrust upwards, causing him to fuck himself off his chair a little with how eager he’s pretending to hump his little sister, to properly punish you—or so he tells himself, but deep down he understands it’s more like he just wants to wet his cock, remind you of who you really belong to—because it’s what you fucking deserve.

You deserve to feel the entirety of his greedy cock slipping and sliding between your folds, you deserve to feel the guilt and shame he’s desperately humping upon you for getting so wet due to big brothers cock. He’s entitled to this, he thinks. Putting up with you all these years, he takes his frustrations out by repeatedly knocking the tip of his cock against the faux clit of the pocket pussy to hopefully have you sobbing in your sheets, squirming under the phantom feeling of his cock bullying your upsettingly perfect little cunt. By the thick squelch that soon fills his room with every pass of his girth up and down the toy, he knows you must be enjoying his disgusting treatment. Gross, he smiles to himself.

Busy humping himself silly against your fake cunt, he doesn’t fully register how close he is to slipping inside until it eventually happens. One minute he’s blissfully content rubbing one out against your slit, and the next he’s folding in on himself in a full body silent gasp, cock head fully engulfed in your tight little hole and knocking the wind out of him. Karma, he supposes, and then immediately forgets about as he feels your cunt squeeze around his intrusion for the first time ever; and you manage to effectively shut him up, no talking back or standing up to your teasing for once. Until you do it again, even if involuntary. “Shit— fuck.” He groans, a rough sound crawled up from the pit of his tummy, drawn out from how nice and wet the toy in his hands is, thanks to you. His weight shifts in his old computer chair, squeaking like it always does when he jerks off to the screen, only now it’s due to the immense strain he has to endure not to immediately bury himself balls deep in your cunt. You squeeze around him again as if asking for it and it hits him all at once, forced to realise with such sudden and alarming clarity that he was very much fucked. Ruined, truthfully. The sinful suck of your linked cunt promising to spoil every other hole he potentially fucks in future, leaking little sister cream all over his twitching cock to entice him deeper, to fall further into your messy cunt depravity.

And really, it’s not bullying if you like it. He’s not being mean by rolling his hips into you slowly, forcing you to savour every thick inch he’s got to offer as he enters you, tiny little humps upwards rather than forcing the toy down his cock to simulate sex better. You like it, don’t you? Dribbling all over his cock, bet you’re writhing in your sheets right now for him; because you must be just as slutty as him to be enjoying this. And it’s embarrassing just how much he likes it, how he already knows he’ll never be able to leave the pocket pussy alone, biting his lip raw to try and stifle his moans, squeezing one eye shut as if he was pained to be feeling so good, and he feels forced to swallow a bark creeping to his tongue at how annoyed he is. It’s unfair that you feel so good wrapped around him like this, half his cock buried in the toy, coating his length in even more slick to make the glide inside easier. And he thinks to himself that if you didn’t want it, you wouldn’t be this fucking slippery, his head thrown back at the soft squelch his cock fucks out of you. “That’s it, fuck— what a good sister…” He ends up praising you despite his frustrations, unable to hide his genuine feelings for you in the secrecy of his own room, squeezing the pocket pussy even tighter around his greedy cock as he pushes up, up, and up until finally the faux lips rest against his pelvis and he can finally breathe again.

More than anything he wants to fist your hair and mess up your pretty styling, force his lips onto your own so that you can taste just how much he wants you; how downright desperate he is to claim you as his own. You’re his little sister, so you belong to him, right? Should be creaming on his cock and not anyone elses, cunt twitching around his fat girth as he grinds his hips into the toy, little circles to tease and taunt, bully you back into place for your petulant attitude he’s had to deal with his whole life. Payback, he muses, panting at the way your fake cunt accepts him so easily, willingly wrapping around him so snugly; like you were made to take his cock. Just barely inside and you’ve already got him pulsing, balls taut at the way he so easily falls into you, how he’s sure he could cum right now just by circling his cock inside of you, stirring your insides up to prepare you for what inevitably comes next. Annoying, because he went into this perverted prank hoping to just upset you, to make you sob and whine on his cock like a good girl for once, and yet here he is struggling to regulate his breathing, fighting with himself to keep his hips from humping.

But fuuuuck you feel so good, nice and tight and eager, constantly twitching and squirming on his cock to coax more precum out to stain your insides with, sucking his tip in so well as if asking for more, begging big brother to fuck you. And he’s watched enough hentai to know that he’s not immune to the little sister allure, despite his intentions to simply fuck with you; he has to show you that he’s the one in charge here, right? Regardless of his flimsy excuse, he does so instinctively, a flash of regret buried deep in his mind that’s easily clouded over by the sudden swallow of your cunt as he withdraw his hips, leaving only his tip inside to tease you with. More slick gushes out of the toy, trickling down to his balls and onto his chair, a tut escaping him despite being alone. “You’re such a fucking tease, y’know that?” He slurs, words caught in his throat and forced out of him as he drops the toy on his cock, shivering into the dirty action before repeating it again. And again. And again, until his fist wraps neatly around the toy enough to control the speed and he starts jerking off with your cunt.

Greedy gulps of air is all that’s heard in his room, besides the odd squeak and dribble of saliva, a few drops pooling on his tummy as he revels in the act of taking his perfect princess little sister in private. At least he tries to keep quiet, but it’s hard to keep his voice down when your walls squeeze him tighter, prompting him to suckle on his hoodie sleeve and pretend it was your nipple instead, lacing his tongue over the rough fabric as a means to distract himself from falling in love with your cunt. Is this how Sam feels when inside of you? Do you get this slippery for your boyfriend too, or is it because deep down you know big brother is fucking you properly.

God he feels dizzy, so turned on at the thought of not only defiling you, but of doing it in a way where you’re left uninformed. He wishes he could see your confused tear stained face, wants to watch you shake and cry for help while he bullies his cock into you, leaking all over the toy with every fuck of his hips upwards, matching the downward tug of his hands. And it’s even more fucked up that he’s treating you like the toy you are right now, literally jerking himself off as his tongue pokes against the inside of his cheek, furrowing his brows to gain greater focus, leaning back against his chair so that he can hump into the faux hole at abetter angle. “So good—” He babbles to himself, fluttering his lashes at the way the toy slams back down on his balls, the corners of his mouth wet with drool from the sound of your cunt making room for his corrupt cock. “Knew you’d feel s—so good—” The immorality of his actions only turns him on more, his legs coming out to straighten while his back arches against his chair, fucking into the toy with needy desperation, a tut on his tongue at how perfect you are for him. He hates how good it feels, wants to fuck his frustrations out on you, slamming the toy down as much as he fucks into it so you can really feel just how much you truly upset him. If it feels this good with a toy, he can’t imagine how ruined he’s gonna be when it comes to the real thing—because of course he’s gonna fuck you for real, are you kidding? God, you feel too fucking good it’s unfair, should be illegal—letting him masturbate inside of you like this; his infatuation for you deepens, and the closer he gets the less liable he is to hold on to his grievances.

“Stupid girl—” He mumbles, a line of drool spilling from his lips too. In the privacy of his basement room, he allows himself a moment to indulge. “If— fuck, oh my God— if only you— If—” He tries. God, he tries to get his words out, clamping both hands around the slippery wet toy and leaning forward to rest his head on his desk, standing up off his chair—too hopeless to remain seated—so that he can drag the toy on and off his cock with more ease. Faster, too, his hips try to keep up with his quick fists but they’re no match, he’s spent way too many lonely night pumping his cock raw to give his hips a chance. Slick drips from the pocket pussy, his feet planted firmly on the ground to give him better grip to fuck you with, and the floorboards squeak with the weight of his thrusts. But he doesn’t slow down, can’t, really. Unable to give even himself a breather from the disgusting situation, frantically fucking the toy in his fists like his life depended on it, his previous plans of getting back at you forgotten about in favour of simply getting off, uncaring for how you must be so scared right now because you’re making him feel so good: and that’s all that matters. He's so selfish, focusing only on his own pleasure as he splits you in two in the palm of his hands, baby must be stretching so well to fit him all in.

“If only you were— were this good all the time.” He finishes his thought and half laughs, but it soon turns into a low moan when the toy clenches around him, shaking and shivering down his mean big brother cock for him to enjoy. “It’s like y’were made for this—” He continues to babble, huffing against his desk while his thighs shake with you, his tummy tight with lust when he imagines that you might already be close from his harassment, like you were in the room with him. And he almost wants to let you cum, only because he’s too selfish to pass up the opportunity of feeling you convulse on his cock. But he’s so close too, and he smiles with an offer you’ve got no way of reciprocating. “Wanna see who cums first?”

You have been such a good girl for him tonight, haven’t you? Allowed him to inflict such lewd acts on you, and not only that, but you’ve accepted his brutish abuse so nicely. Never mind the fact that you quite literally couldn’t fight back, he’s far too pussy drunk and buried too deep in the faux cunt to rationalise with himself, mind empty beyond the need to breed his favourite new toy the way she deserves, snapping his hips into your hole with sloppy precision; he can’t seem to get the right angle, nor can he keep a consistent speed, rendered dumb thanks to the tight squeeze your cunt offers him. “Does it feel good?” He sighs, riling himself up as an orgasm creeps up on him, humouring his fantasies while he’s ball deep inside of you because: why not at this point? “Does big brothers cock feel sooo good?” He continues, adopting a babying tone as if you were actually under him right now, nails digging into the split wood of his desk as if it were your hair, or your shoulder, doesn’t matter; he just wants to keep you in place. “Gonna cum for big brother? Make him feel so good too?” He pants, an unavoidable coil tightening in his core as heat flushes to his cheeks, voice barely above a whisper while he fucks himself off. He can only imagine what he must look like right now, bent over his desk and huffing, head pressed against his forearm to hide his face into his desk, pants barely half on or half off, dangling by his knees while his hips swing in the air. And then, he tries to imagine you. How cute you’d look right now as he fucks into you with such speed he has to step back a few times to re-position, balls slapping against the magic toy with a resounding plap!, sticky sweet slick keeping him connected to you with a soft squish. He only stands up more so that he can continue his delusions, looking down to where his cock meets you cunt and how a ring of cream rests at the base, a sheen coating the rest of his length for him to gawk at.

A mistake, truthfully, but he isn’t complaining too much when he instantly shoots a load inside of the toy, shoving his cock as deep as possible into the tiny hole stretched to fit him so he can properly sow his seed, stake his claim all over your insides with thick white ropes. Mark you as: Big Brother’s. It doesn’t so much as catch him by surprise as it becomes immediately expected, face all scrunched up in rotten pleasure for the accidental creampie, a strangled sis caught in his throat before moans tumble, followed by breathy laughter and sighs. He doesn’t stop thrusting his hips forward, riding his orgasm out by riding you, inadvertently fucking his cum deeper into the toy and keeping it there, lazily tugging the toy up and down his still hard cock until he’s sure he’s made you’ve milked every last drop he has for you.

He only realises that he’s neglected to let you cum as he’s pulling out, slowly removing his cock from the toy with a wince, watching with genuine interest as drops of seed dribble out and over his spent cock. Serves you right for dating Sam when big brother has been right here this whole time, waiting to have you submit to his cock. He laughs, a sinister smirk with knowing that you must be so frustrated to be left high and dry like that, to no longer even appreciate the feeling of fullness as he twists the toy in his hand so that he can assess the damage, gently pulling the folds apart so he can watch more of his cum seep out. A deep urge to eat you clean rises to his tongue when he inspects your hole, but he bites it back, tells himself that there’s more satisfaction in leaving you to deal with the consequences of your actions than to reinforce your bad behaviour behind a tongue flat against your slit. That, and he’d hate to reward you and have you know that you’ve given him the best orgasm of his life; and you didn’t even have to do anything but lay there! He’s treated you well enough, he decides, dropping the toy on his desk for him to gape at lovingly.

He sits there for a few seconds, awaiting the wash of clarity over his system to come, but when it doesn’t he simply smiles. “Fuck.” He finally sighs, and it’s a confession of sorts. Of what he doesn’t have much time to figure out, seeing as his phone soon vibrates next to him, a flash of a notification on the screen. It takes him a moment to get to it, because he’s too busy admiring how messy he’s made your pretty princess parts, smearing big brothers cum all over the slit with his thumb just because he can. But he gives in to curiosity once he’s satisfied with painting, unlocking his phone only to be greeted by your name, or the one he’s so fondly given you.

Brat: Can you come help me sebby?

A loud bark of laughter rises in his chest, throwing his head back in the gratification you’ve so kindly offered him. You can handle a little more teasing, right? It’s only fair, seeing as this is the first time he’s fully bitten back at you.

Sebastian: No, I’m busy.

And it’s not even a lie, his thumb gliding easily over the faux clit to ruin you some more, a punishment for distracting him from his afterglow. He almost gets to forget about you before you draw his attention again, another vibration from his phone that reads:

Brat: It’s serious, please!

Sebastian: … Where are you?

It’s a stupid question, he knows, but he wants to make you really suffer. It’s not often you need his help, and he’d be a liar if he said it doesn’t feel nice to be relied on by you like this. All you need is him, right? Need big brother to come make you feel all better, yeah? Or maybe that’s just his cock talking, jerking at the thought of you relying on him for more, needing him to help finish you off because you’re too fucked dumb on big brothers cock to function. He’s got half a mind to walk up to your room and fuck you for real, help you finish that way. Would you try to kick him off with his cock womb deep, tears streaming down your pretty face, or would you sob from pleasure, begging big brother for more, because you’re so close and you’d take anything at this point?

Brat: My room, please hurry.!

Definitely more his cock, twitching back to life with the promise of being allowed entry into your sacred room, your hiding place. He locks his phone and throws it to his bed, tucking his stained cock back into his pants and pulling his skinny jeans back up, neglecting to zip in his rush to be at your side; thankful. You should be thankful he’s even giving you the time of day, seeing as you’ve already exhausted your usefulness to him for tonight. Cock spent and hole used, what more could you give him? Regardless, he’s more curious than he is spiteful right now. Wants to see what you look like after taking his cock, and if it matches his thoughts. Without much more convincing, he tucks the toy into his hoodie pocket, confident that you’ll somehow find the evidence of his crime if he doesn’t stash it close to him at all times. He can easily clean his hoodie of cum later, but he can’t face the ramifications of mistreating you in such a deplorable fashion; not now, not ever. His little secret, yeah?

But his chest tightens as he runs up the stairs, breath caught in his throat as he stands outside your room and knocks. Anxious? He can’t figure out what for. This is everything he’s been wanting and more, and when you usher him inside with a panicked voice, he thinks he might have taken things a bit too far; protectiveness surging past his lungs and heart, rising up in a breathy “What’s wrong?” as if he doesn’t know damn well why you sound so confused right now. But that big brother attitude doesn’t last for long, ignored the minute his eyes find yours, taking in the sight of you clutching at your sheets as if you were in pain, legs crossed and covered, like you’re hiding from him. And oh it feels good to be preying on you like this, he has to fight the urge to smile at the pathetic pose you take for him, all pliant and submissive and seeking his help. He doesn't miss the way your nipples poke through your little shirt, or how you sweat from head to toe; working out? And his imagination didn’t do you any justice, seeing you cower in front of him like this as your legs rub together is a wet dream come true. He’s definitely hard again, keeping both hands in his pocket and pushing it down to hopefully hide his embarrassment from your eyes as you shiver before him. He watches as you automatically reach out for him, your mouth opening as if you were going to say something and—

“I— Ah!”

Instinctively, his fingers dip into the toy the moment you try to communicate with him, surprising even him when you gasp at the slender prodding against your insides. If you say anything resembling coherent he doesn't hear it, zoning out as he zeros in on your tits, mouth watering at the sight alone. He wants to suck on them, curling his finger inside of you in response to your unknown teasing, a declaration of want to own every part of you. At least now he knows that the toy is actually magic, unquestionably linked to your sopping wet cunt with how you’re currently reacting to his touch. The way you shake as his finger pad circles your entrance, gliding with the amount of cum leaking from it—and by extension dirtying your bed sheets at this very moment—and how you bite your lip so cutely when he lets its dip further into the hole again, staring directly at you with concentration to commit every detail of you to memory for tonight, almost moaning at the sight of you squeezing your eyes shut to avoid his dumb gaze, how pretty you look with your brows all furrowed and hand hiding your cute little sounds.

All you’ve done is convinced him that he needs to fuck you for real, and soon. Twisting the single finger buried knuckle deep in the toy around, exploring your pretty little cunt with precision. Like he already knows all your sweet spots given the reactions you’re offering him; or maybe that’s because he’s already fucked you close to completion already, fingering you to the cusp again as he stands awkwardly hiding his hard on in your room.

“What— Uh, what’s wrong?” He clears his throat, but still his voice is dry and needy, a hidden deep want for you lacing the words as you squirm and sob on your sheets. For him. It’s a bit weird that he’s waited so long to ask you, he thinks, but you also seem to be a bit too distracted to notice as he introduces a second finger to the puffy toy in his pocket, pushing in instantly and easily from the fluids leaking from your hole, leaving you unable to talk once more. “Are you okay?” He gasps, knows that you aren’t, fuck, look at you; but he has to ask to keep up his facade. Wants to pretend he doesn’t know why you’re struggle to do anything other than babble before him as a means to bully you some more. It’s your fault, maybe if you weren’t so fucking cute when crying then he’d move on, but your tear stained cheeks coax him to continue, scissoring his long fingers inside your hole with eagerness, like doing so would make you feel better.

And it would, and he wants to see it, but the second he begins to slowly pump his scissoring in and out of your greedy cunt you urge him to leave. A high pitched whine of go away! While you bury your face in the sheets, folding in on yourself—fucking pretty, by the way—as he assumes you’re right on the edge is enough for him. Your hidden face providing him the space to smile down at you, but it’s loving. Adoration, even. Can’t quite believe just how pretty you are when you’re rendered useless on his hand like this, and he promises himself as he turns to leave to have you act so sweetly with him the next time you try to annoy him. This is the little sister he’s always wanted, and if you play nice for him, he’ll even call you as such to your face.

“Okay.” He simply leaves you with, all breathy and empty as he exits your room, slamming the door shut only because he’s in a rush to rest his back against the same door to pull his cock out, still fingering your pretty pussy in his pocket and listening out for your cute moans to soon fill your room. Another round wouldn’t hurt, especially when you start to whimper his name so prettily like that, right?

#sdv smut #stardew valley smut #sdv sebastian smut #also trying a new way of styling these posts!#think its cute #I FORGOT TO ADD THE TITLE HEHE

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auralina33 · 2 months

Text

AU MASTERPOST

Since I'm finally posting more content about my AUs, I figured I may as well make a little masterpost of what characters are in it and what they're all about!

Information under the cut because this is a lot longer than expected! Also, both AUs will be written in different colors for ease of finding the information on each of them.

MEMENTO MORI!

Animatronic names

Glamrock Freddy - Glam

Glamrock Bonnie - Gloss

Glamrock Chica - Gala

Roxanne Wolf

Montgomery Gator

Moondrop - Luna

Sunnydrop - Sol

(Possible) Eclipse - Chroma

OC - Melody

Major human characters

Gregory Stand-In - Vivianne Whitaker

Vanny - Ivanna Harland, Vanna

Vanessa - Vanessa Coella, Anne

Side characters

Vivianne's younger sister - Olive Whitaker

Marketing - Luis Cabrera

Daycare assistant - Jenna Rusk

Roxanne's designer, makeup artist and hair stylist - Manuel Almeida

Sol and Luna's creator and general engineer and technician - Drew Vesper

Melody's creator and cabinet technician - Liv Rivera

Missing kid - Renata Gonzáles

Missing kid - Elliot Gonzáles

Missing kid - Cassie Arison

Higher-up - Beatrice Dara

Higher-up - Robert Buckingham

CEO - Dominic Arison

Symbolic characters

PRINCESS QUEST

Princess (later Queen) Ivie, Harewolf, The Corpse - Vanna

Princess (later King) Nessie, Lighthouse, The Exiled - Anne

The Duke - Glam

The Guildmaster (?) - Gloss

The Baker - Gala

The Baroness - Roxanne

The Knight - Montgomery

The Magician - Luna

The Jester - Sol

The Librarian - Melody

LET'S PLAY WITH ECLIPSE (BALLOON WORLD)

"Eclipse", Umbra - Vanna?

Eclipse, Saros - Luna?

Lullaby - Melody

More characters may come...

WHAT IS MEMENTO MORI ABOUT?

Memento Mori goes into themes of neurodivergency, loneliness, and the intersection between them as a major thing and arguably the most important underlying plot line underneath your typical FNAF SB plot. At the very least it's important to me.

It takes place in the year 2031, with the PizzaPlex having opened in 2025, two years after a canon-divergent FFPS. It's connected to my currently very under construction humanized FNAF1-FFPS AU, All Those Nights.

It starts off when Vanna, a woman who is tired of being nobody and determined to be remembered, sets her sights on the PizzaPlex to try and cause some loud, flashy tragedy that will make her stick in people's memory. With the help of her girlfriend, Anne, who she's known since she was a child and reunited with as an adult, since Vanna faked her death in her teenage years. Anne has a hatred for people and a disillusionment with the world around her, but also holds a sense of morality she tries to bury.

Vanna could have had some morals, but thanks to her past with street violence, she is very desensitized to her own horrible actions and much more ready to go through with this. She has a playful, friendly demeanor that hides horrendous anger issues caused by emotional dysregulation, buried self-hatred, and a sort of spite towards a world where she never fit in.

So, the PizzaPlex.

Through the course of six months, Vanna and Anne hack the Glamrocks one by one, and kill several people to try and fulfill Vanna's goal.

The events of FNAF SB proper follow primarily Glam as the protagonist, with Vivianne as a sort of second POV, as they try to survive, figure out what's happening, and save everyone, while also trying to find Vivianne's sister, who got stuck here with her.

There's also some side plots! Such as...

-Gala, Monty and Roxy slowly coming to realize that what's going on here isn't what they're being led to believe, only to be fully stripped of their free will to ensure they stay in line, something that happened to Melody a while before the events of the plot.

-Sol's initial attempts to get back to safety when they know everything's dangerous, from which they shift focus upon running into Melody, realizing something's wrong, and trying to find a way to help him.

-Luna being a looming presence through most of these plot lines, being just... different. In reality, it's Vanna keeping things in check, while Luna's stuck in the back of his own body, spectating.

-And Vanna and Anne's attempts to get everything back on track as Vanna starts to lose her temper and speed towards her own doom.

There's some doodle comics about Memento Mori floating around my blog, I may link those later.

SECURITY IS IN PLACE!

Animatronic names

Glamrock Freddy - Astrifer

Glamrock Bonnie - Noctifer

Montgomery Gator - Stellifer

Glamrock Chica - Sally

Roxanne Wolf - Rox

Moondrop - Tsuki

Sunnydrop - Taiyo

Major human characters

Protagonist - Bernadette Murray, Berry, Dettie

Vanessa - Vanessa Monroe, Nessa

Vanny - Valentine Lovett, Heartache

Side characters

CEO - Steve Raglan, previously Sammy Emily

Higher-up - John Burrows

Edwin Murray - Edwin Murray

Gregory - Gregory Ledger

Cassie - Cassie Burrows, possibly

More human characters may be borrowed from Memento Mori or concepted up

WHAT IS SECURITY IS IN PLACE ABOUT?

So this AU started as a "yes, and..." bit with a mutual about a FNAF SB dating sim. It's not actually super romance focused but I'm telling you this because the way the story is set up and stuff like the theming surrounding this AU's Vanny makes more sense in that context.

So, the year is 2005, owing to the timeskip between FNAF1 and FNAF3 being cut some.

The PizzaPlex, opened in 2003, has moved on from the horrors of the past. Or most people think that, anyways. Raglan, a king of coping healthily with grief, pulled a small funny move, and designed nearly all the Glamrocks after people from the past.

Astrifer is designed after Henry Emily.

Noctifer is designed after William Afton.

Taiyo and Tsuki are designed after the Puppet, and, in turn, Charlie Emily.

Sally is designed after Susie Beck.

Rox is designed after the Mangle.

Stellifer is exempt from this and an outlier in that. He probably was just bought from a different location and redesigned a bit.

Most people don't notice, or don't care enough to think too hard about it.

Valentine Lovett, the now adult younger sister of Susie Beck, isn't most people.

Valentine is a very sweet and cheerful woman who keeps up such a sickeningly pretty, lovely appearance. In actuality, she is a very disturbed individual whose life was ruined by her sister's death, as her parents couldn't cope with it and traumatized her even further by projecting Susie on her.

Valentine is someone incredibly obsessive and who struggles to come to terms with reality, and she sees the Glamrocks as a revival of people who should have stayed dead. So she's decided she's gonna be the one to make them truly gone. She's also a terrifyingly skilled stalker.

The story is divided into several "routes", with highly differing story lines. However, each character has their route jointed with another, and while the character you pick will mostly be the focus, the events will follow a roughly similar progression for both of those characters.

So, routes:

NIGHT GUARD: Astrifer - Nessa (Hacked: Noctifer, Tsuki)

STAGE CREW: Noctifer - Stellifer (Hacked: The opposite of who you pick. If you pick Noctifer, Stellifer will get hacked, and viceversa)

KITCHEN: Sally - Rox (Hacked: Rox)

DAYCARE: Tsuki - Taiyo (Hacked: Tsuki)

HEARTBREAKER: Valentine (Hacked: Noctifer, Tsuki, Rox, Stellifer, Sally)

ABOUT THE HEARTBREAKER ROUTE...

It is possible to choose Valentine within the story of SiiP. A sort of New Game+ possibility where Bernadette has the chance to meet Valentine early and bond with her first.

This isn't an "I can fix her" story path, however, it's a "She will make you worse" one.

Bernadette is someone who would very much do anything for a person they care about. At the beginning here, when they heard of Valentine's motivations, they thought she had a bit of a point.

So, they decided to help her.

I typically dub this story path's Bernadette either Darling or Heartbreaker, and the story follows their plunge into a full-on corruption arc that lands them as a true, full villain by the end of it, perhaps to an even greater degree than Valentine.

They carefully work their way into ensuring they don't get attached to anyone other than Valentine, manipulate the characters they normally would have bonded with and make them believe they're their friend, ready, at any time needed, to betray each and every one of them for their own gain.

Darling started out not as certain of this, but slowly came to realize they enjoy the thrill of being in control, and started to become a cruel, malicious and silver-tongued person. They still love Valentine deeply, but it's hard for them to truly extend that care to anyone else.

They become the closest SiiP has to a Mimic variant, and this story path leads to SiiP's own version of Security Breach within lore, which would be a lot more focused on mind games and the fear of not knowing who or what you can trust.

There's a Ruin DLC side AU spanning off of it too, but that's in the works.

Check out 1 2 3 for some in-universe information on Heartbreaker FNAF SB!

If you got this far, thanks for reading!

#fnaf au #memento mori au #security is in place au #security is in place: heartbreaker

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etaindelaserna · 2 months

Note

What do you think are Yuuji and Sukuna’s greatest personality strengths and weaknesses? Why? What do you love about their dynamic?

P.s

It's hard to find sukuita shipper, so I'm excited when found your blog. And love your otps, thanks for sharing them. 🌻🌷🥰

Thank you so much for reaching out!😊

I‘m quite new to the JJK fandom (watched the anime during the Christmas Holidays), so getting into contact with a fellow Sukuita shipper, makes me giddy with excitement✨

Let’s start with Yuuji🧡

To me, Yuuji’s greatest strength is his unyielding will. It doesn’t matter what you throw at him: he will pull through, he will make the impossible possible. He might crumble and lose faith for a moment but he will regroup and try again. Considering what has happened to him so far in JJK it‘s admirable that he still has it somewhat together.

I actually had to stop and think about his weakness🤔 It’s tricky because at least in the context of the JJK world it’s indicated that he cares too much and is incapable of making rational, cold blooded sacrifices: he wants to save everyone, which to me is a strength. At the same time his good heart is the source of his suffering. It eats Yuuji up that people die because he ate Sukuna’s finger, which in itself was an act of pure selflessness and trying to protect his friends and Megumi. His compassion curses people close to him. He’s basically a Gryffindor: all bravery but without a good plan for action.

Sukuna is very focused on his goals and goes about it very rationally. That allows him to push beyond of what’s thought to be possible. He doesn’t care about limitations. He doesn’t try. He just does it. He takes what he wants because he knows he can.

Sukuna’s weakness is that he doesn’t acknowledge the potential of Yuuji’s ideal. Yuuji refuses to be selfish with his powers in contrast to how Sukuna defines strength and how to obtain it. I think, Sukuna is going to learn the hard way that pushing the limits/taking your desires + not caring about anybody else don’t have to be exclusives.

What I love about their dynamic is the constant beef they have with each other because of the clash of their ideals.

On the one hand it makes for good comedy that the King of Curses is stuck with a brat, who didn’t even know who he was and who doesn’t fear or respect him one bit, but has the power to control him. On the other hand their combination has so much potential for tragedy. They seem to be Yin and Yang, somewhat completing each other and yet, they are like water and oil, they are doomed to coexist although they can’t coexist. Plus there is also the element of the lure to the dark side for Yuuji, which I’m always attracted to when it comes to shipping. Also also: Sukuna is such a spiteful jerk✨ and so unapologetic about it and Yuuji is the ray of sunshine. That alone would have been enough for me to ship them🙈

#sukuna x yuuji #sukuita #ask me #the jerk and the ray of sunshine #jjk ship

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frogletscribe · 4 months

Text

Until It Doesn’t Hurt

Chapter 11: So Long and Lost

Summary:

20 years since the RDA was pushed off of the moon of Pandora, they are back once more. The RDA thinks their only problem is the traitor Jake Sully and his family, but as it turns out, Jake wasn’t the only ‘problem’ left behind 20 years ago.

Anthe was a child soldier, stolen from their home and forced to learn the ways of the humans, erasing any of their connections to the Na’vi from before. Finally free from the RDA’s hold after being trapped in cryosleep, they're about to make themselves everyone's problem.

---

Tenak has entered the chat, Neteyam struggles to adapt, Anthe and Spider get bad news

_____________________________________________

Pairing: Aged Up!Neteyam X Nonbinary!Na'vi!Reader/OC (OC and Neteyam are both around 20)

Warnings: Mentions of Past Violence, Mentions of Past Trauma, Mild Claustrophobia, No Use of Y/N, Blood, Self-depreciation, Neglectful Parenting, Suggestive Themes, Mutual Pining, Hurt-Comfort, Found Family

WC: 3672 words. AO3 Link Here

A/N: Okay its been a sec! I graduated college (yaay) and also had my laptop and switch stolen in the same day (;~;) SO, this took me a minute to finish. Also thank you to everyone who has been liking and reblogging my doodles!

I feel like I should also note that I still have not played Frontiers of Pandora so, there are obviously going to be differences. I'm staying away from using too many explicit references, or else im gonna frustrate myself when i actually do get to play the game lol

{ } indicate speaking Na'vi

Masterlist

Previous Next

_____________________________________________

One of Tenak’s clearest memories of his childhood was the first time had met Anthe. He was thirteen years old, the oldest child to have been taken just a few years prior. There were only three others then, all between eight and eleven, and all looking to him for safety and guidance. Anthe arrived with three more children, nine years old and full of spite and fire. The others that came with them were even smaller, six and seven at most, clinging to Anthe’s legs, trying to hide from the strangers that had killed their families and stole them from their homes.

Tenak watched through the classroom window with Kala, a girl from his village that had been stolen with him, waiting to see what would happen with this new group of Na’vi children. They watched the RDA soldiers try to drag Anthe and the other kids towards the classroom. The smaller children went more easily, still too scared to fight back, but not Anthe. Tenak watched the younger child kick and hiss at the soldiers. Teacher tried to step in, urging the soldiers to stop trying to force the child to go, but the soldiers were already angry, and Anthe was still kicking and cursing at anything that tried to get too close.

So, Tenak made a choice. He left the classroom, pushing past Teacher and the soldiers and putting himself between them and the child. Someone tried to grab him, and drag him back into the classroom as well, but at thirteen Tenak was already taller and stronger than the human soldiers, and could easily brush them back. He stuck out a hand to who he would soon know to be Anthe, helping them back to their feet where the soldiers had pushed them down. They eyed him warily, as Teacher was frantically trying to keep the soldiers from escalating things further.

“{Why do you dress like them?}” Anthe’s voice was small but accusatory. Tenak looked down at himself, clad in the TAP issue pants and shirt he wore. By contrast, this new child still wore their more traditional Na’vi clothes, a woven and beaded top with matching tewng.

“{They took my clothes.}” He said simply, his mother tongue feeling rusty in his own mouth. “{They will take yours too, and anything else you have.}” The child swallowed, curling in on themselves protectively.

“Hey! English only! You know the rules!” One of the soldiers grabbed Tenak by the arm, shouting in his face.

“They do not know English yet.” He hissed back through gritted teeth. “They are confused, and will not listen until they know what’s going on.” There was a moment of tension, Tenak staring down the soldier holding him, ears pinned back against his skull.

“Then do your explaining back in the classroom.” The soldier finally relented, shoving the children towards the door. Anthe was less resistant this time, holding close to Tenak as he quietly ushered them into the room, Teacher close behind them. The three other new children were all huddled together around Kala, sniffling and sobbing into her shirt. She was only eleven, and already acting like a mother hen for all the younger children.

“Okay.” Teacher let out a shaky breath, closing the door behind her. “New agenda for the day, we are going to help our new friends get adjusted.” Her smile when she turned back to the eight Na’vi children did not meet her eyes, and Tenak could see the anxiety in the shake of her hands.

Over the next several hours, Tenak and Kala helped Teacher clean up and dress the new children in TAP uniforms. More soldiers came and went, taking away the children’s old clothes and songcords, but while there were many tears, this time there was less fighting. Anthe, as Tenak finally managed to get their name, refused to make a single sound or acknowledge anyone but him. Not once did they cry, only gritting their teeth and clenching their fists as even more was taken from them. That was the last day any of them were allowed to speak Na’vi freely and without punishment, the last day they had even the smallest taste of home, and the first day of the rest of their lives.

Ten years they stayed in TAP, losing their language and stories with the passage of time. Ten years trapped in a cage that turned them into weapons against their own people. All the younger ones were gone now and all that was left were Tenak, Kala, and Anthe. But, Anthe hadn’t woken up when he and Kala had. They had lost fifteen years of their lives to the cryopods and Anthe was still asleep.

Every year, for the last five years, he had made a point of going back to TAP and checking on Anthe in their pod. When he and Kala had first woken up, Anthe’s pod was the only other one to have not gone completely dark already. They had tried everything they could think of to get their younger sibling out and nothing had worked. So Tenak took to waiting, going back as often as he could, waiting for Anthe to wake up.

However, he had gotten caught up in the new RDA invasion, trying to protect the new friends and clans he had met in the Western Frontier of Pandora, and now Anthe was gone. Tenak had returned to where Kala was staying with the Aranahe clan in a panic, Pandora was a big place and their younger sibling could be anywhere. Kala was significantly calmer about the news, reassuring him that Anthe would find their way back to them. She had always been the wisest of their family and a mother figure to the younger of them.

“They are strong, Tenak. Anthe knows how to take care of themselves.”

“But they are alone! And you know they hate about being around strangers. They’re not going to stay with another clan.” Tenak knew Anthe too well, and knew their anxiety about being an outsider. He had struggled with it as well before he and Kala had met the clans in the west.

“We don’t know that. There are many clans, it's entirely possible that they found a safe place to stay.”

But where Kala was a calm and patient voice to soothe him, Tenak’s own inner voice was the exact opposite. Within two days, Tenak was searching every clan in the area, using an old photograph of the two of them he carried with him to ask if anyone had seen Anthe. The longer he searched the more stressed he got, especially knowing that the RDA was back, leaving Anthe in more danger because of it.

Now, Tenak was practically a year into his search, and there was still no sign of his younger sibling. Kala stayed behind with the Aranahe, just in case they popped up, but Tenak set his sights for the East. There were a number of clans in that direction, as well as the new RDA headquarters if his intel was right. If Anthe was there then Tenak would find them, no matter what it took.

— — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — —

The Metkayina Clan at Awa’atlu were kind to the Sully’s for the most part. The first few weeks in the reef village were tense, but with help from the Olo’eyktan and his family, mostly his daughter Tsireya, the family was brought quickly into the larger community. Neteyam’s siblings seemed to take to the ways of the water quickly, but the same could not be said for Neteyam himself. Where once he excelled in every aspect of his life, now he floundered. He struggled to master the breathing techniques Tsireya taught them, and grew frustrated by his slow pace in the water. It was not helped by Ao’nung, Tsireya’s older brother, and his taunting. Neteyam hadn’t wanted to leave home in the first place, but he needed to stay strong for the rest of his family. There was no room for Neteyam to mourn.

Now he sat on the sandy beach, watching his siblings joke with each other and their new friends. Kiri and Tuk were building a sandcastle with Tsireya, while Rotxo was play-fighting in the serf with Ao’nung. Lo’ak had run off in a huff earlier, upset that no one believed that his new Tulkun friend was not the killer they believed it to be. At least his younger brother was no longer fighting with Ao’nung. It was a good development, especially given the recent fight the Sully brothers had had with the Metkayina man and his friends. Neteyam licked the healing cut on his lip at the memory, wincing as it still stung. Neteyam was still pissed at Ao’nung himself, even if his brother had apparently forgiven him. After the fight, when Lo’ak had attempted to make peace, Ao’nung had almost gotten Lo’ak killed, abandoning the younger man outside the reef in Akula territory. At least, there was no more fighting or insults being thrown.

Neteyam thought now, as he did often, of Anthe, wondering if they were okay, if they had escaped the RDA or were still there with Spider. If they were even still alive. He thumbed softly at the hilt of Anthe’s knife, the only thing he had left of them besides the gifts he never got the chance to give them. Neteyam had finished the knife he made for them, and kept it wrapped up with his belongings, and the clothes Kiri had made for them, hiding it from view. No one had tried talking to him about Anthe since they left the Omaticaya except Kiri, who did her best to reassure him that they would be fine, wherever they were. Even his parents seemed to avoid the subject, as if they had never existed, as if they had never spent the better part of a year in the family's company.

He thought back to their last conversation, how Anthe could believe they weren’t worthy of safety or belonging within the Omatikaya. The thought that they couldn’t ever belong. At the time, he found it hard to understand. He couldn’t see how just having a different upbringing could make a person feel so separate from those around him. Unwelcome. Outsider. But, Neteyam understood it now. He felt it, here with the Metkayina, where none of his previous skills had value, and he was no longer the eldest son of the Olo’eyktan of the Omatikaya. Just another demon blooded outsider. Kiri and Lo’ak had it even worse too, he knew that, even back home they had struggled. Neteyam felt like he had no right to feel this pain now, while his siblings had felt it their entire lives. At least he had his family, all together, all safe, going through the same things with him. Anthe was just alone, not knowing if their family was even alive. No wonder nothing he said had helped. No wonder they had left him when he couldn’t even understand that much.

“{‘Teyam?}” Kiri’s voice pulled him out of his thoughts, back to the beach.

“{Kiri, hey.}” Neteyam shook himself, pocketing the knife again.

“{Are you alright?}” Kiri asked, plopping herself down beside him, and leaning close.

“{I’m fine.}” He shrugged, not looking at his younger sister.

“{Come on, Neteyam, don’t be like that.}” Kiri frowned, nudging Neteyam in the side. “{You’re worried aren’t you?}” Neteyam just shrugged again, leaning into Kiri a bit.

“{I’m fine, Kiri, I promise.}”

“{But you’re not! I know you miss Anthe and your home sick, we all are.}”

“{Kiri.}” He sighed, “{You really do not need to worry about me, I will be fine, I’m just…}”

“{Sad. You’re sad, and heart broken, and I know you would rather wallow in it but I don’t accept that. I miss Spider more than anything, but we have to trust that they will be okay. They will come back.}” Kiri spoke, holding Neteyam’s face in her hands and forcing him to look at her. Of course he knew she was right, just as she usually was. Neteyam let out a heavy sigh, slumping into his sister’s hands and letting his face squash in her palms. Kiri smiled, pinching her older brother's cheeks with a soft chuckle.

“{Tsireya said she got her mother's permission to take us to the Spirit Tree here, you should come with us. Please, come with us.}”

“{Okay.}” Neteyam nodded finally, letting Kiri drag him back to his feet.

“{Is he coming?}” Tuk hollered, seeing her older siblings approach where she and Tsireya sat.

“{Should we try to find Lo’ak too?}”Tsireya looked to Kiri, worried expression on her soft features. The Metkayina girl had grown close with Neteyam’s younger brother, who in turn had a very obvious crush on her as well.

“{I’m not sure he really wants to be around us yet. We can bring him next time.}” Kiri sighed.

It didn't take long for the group to reach the Metkayina’s underwater Spirit Tree, but the sun was still setting quickly in the distance. Ao’nung had excused himself before the group had left, leaving Tsireya and Rotxo to guide Neteyam and his sisters. Even from atop the waves, the view of the glowing tree below them was breathtaking. Tuk was standing excitedly on the back of Kiri’s Ilu, eager to jump straight in, while Tsireya explained that she and Rotxo would act as the Sully’s dive partners to keep them safe while they connected to the tree.

One by one they each slipped from the backs of their Ilu and dove down into the water. Neteyam could see that Kiri especially seemed excited. She had prayed at the Brother Tree back in their home forest all the time, and was deeply spiritual compared to Neteyam and the rest of his siblings. This would be the first time in months that she could connect to Eywa again since they left. Rotxo brought Tuk to one coral-like branch of the tree while Tsireya led Neteyam and Kiri to their own, encouraging them to connect. He could see why his little brother could be falling for such a sweet girl. Carefully, he reached back for his kuru, watching the pink tendrils hidden beneath the end of his braid eagerly reach for the tree as he brought them to the branch and closed his eyes.

Neteyam was back in the forest, familiar and warm, in an area he knew quite well. He followed the small path to the pond he had brought Anthe to so long ago. It was just as he remembered, the afternoon light bleeding softly through the tree canopy above, glittering across the shifting pool like gems. It felt calm there, peaceful in a way Neteyam missed. But something still felt like it was missing, beyond just the fact that Neteyam knew he wasn’t actually there. It was calm, but it was also lonely, the lack of Anthe’s presence making itself known.

Homesick, heartbroken, hopeless, Neteyam felt all of it. At least here, he could actually let himself feel it, finally someplace private without fear of interruption. The last time he had tried to have a moment to himself, it had been cut off by the admission from Ao’nung that Lo’ak had been abandoned out in open water, and Neteyam had been scolded for not being there to stop it. Here that wouldn’t happen, he could just be alone and feel as sad as he needed to without being a burden to anyone. It was cathartic, right up until the flashing started, suddenly pulling Neteyam from the connection, back to reality. Neteyam shook his head, trying to orient himself as Tsireya rushed past him, towards where he saw Kiri convulsing, seizing under the water.

— — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — —

“We found something.” Quaritch grinned at the group of Recoms standing around the conference room, and Anthe felt their heart drop to the pit of their stomach. There was a chorus of whooping and cheers from the soldiers around them, but Spider was stock still and pale as a ghost. Anthe did their best not to show their dread, forcing a grin and high five when Ja turned towards them to celebrate.

“We got a helicopter ping headed in the direction of this cluster of islands.” The Colonel pointed out on a holographic map, showing an area to the South West of their current location.

“Ardmore is sending us to the RDA coastal base, here.” He pointed to an area more immediately west of Bridgehead. “Where we will catch a ride to search the islands.”

“Colonel.” Anthe managed, doing their best to seem as neutral as possible. They had only just been released from their ‘probation’, their ankle tracker finally removed, and one step closer to getting out.

“What is it, private?”

“Are we sure it’s them? You said all that was left back at the original RDA base were scientists, could it just be a research team or something?”

“It’s possible.” Quaritch nodded. “But it's still a lead to Sully. If it's anything good, then maybe you’ll get some use outta that rifle of yours, too. Speaking of-” Quaritch motioned over to a grinning Lyle who excitedly pulled a familiar large shape from behind his back, handing it to Anthe.

“You get your piece back!” The recom grinned, clapping a hand on Anthe’s shoulder. Anthe was quick to check over the rifle, it was cleaner than they expected with a new strap, but undamaged and otherwise unchanged. The weapons' familiar weight in their hands brought with it a sense of safety Anthe hadn’t truly felt in a while, that made the smile that crossed their face feel that much more genuine. They held it close, nodding a quiet thanks to Lyle as he crossed back to his place at the Colonel’s side.

“Right.” Quaritch coughed, regaining the room's attention, an air of smugness about him that suggested he was pleased with Anthe’s reaction. “We leave in one hour, so get your shit together and be ready to go. Anthe, make sure the kid doesn’t break anything while we load up. Dismissed.”

As soon as Quaritch said the word, Anthe was half dragging Spider out of the conference room, back to their dorm. The rifle was comfortably back on their shoulder right where it belonged. Spider was silent, his hands balled into tight fists as Anthe pulled him into their room, locking the door behind them. They turned back to the man slowly, standing stock still in the middle of the room.

“{Spider-}” Anthe started, moving towards their friend.

“{Do you think it’s them?}” Spider suddenly spun towards them, eyes panicked.

“{I don’t know.}”

“{It can’t be them right? There shouldn’t be any reason for a helicopter to go find them unless… unless something went wrong.}” He was spiraling, eyes darting around as he was definitely imagining the worst possible reasons for the Sully’s to suddenly need a helicopter.

“{Spider, look at me.}” Anthe knelt, tossing the rifle on the bed.

“{Something is wrong, something has to be wrong! What if someone is hurt? Lo’ak or Kiri- What if-}”

“{Spider!}” Anthe grabbed both sides of his face, forcing him to look at them. “{We won’t know until we can get out of here, okay? I need you to breathe, deep breathes.}” They placed a palm on his chest, which Spider quickly grabbed onto, trying to anchor himself. Anthe guided him in taking deep, slow breathes, until the man's heart was no longer beating so erratically under their hand.

“{Thinking up worst case scenarios is not going to help anyone right now.}” Anthe spoke again, once Spider had somewhat calmed, and they were both sat on the cold floor of the dorm.

“{Those idiots just gave me back my gun, and they took off the ankle tracker. All we need now is to get rid of your tracker, and find an opportunity to get out of here. If the Sully’s are on one of those islands, then the sooner we get out and warn them, the better. Okay?}”

“{Okay.}” Spider said nodding, his voice barely more than a whisper.

“{We won’t let anyone get hurt. I promise.}”

An hour later Anthe and Spider were on one of Bridgeheads roofs with the rest of the Recoms, securing their few belongings onto Anthe’s ikran before they flew out to the RDA coastal base. Spider remained quiet, largely giving everyone but Anthe the cold shoulder. Quaritch kept looking over at them, something like concern playing on his hard features.

“Okay, Ted. Ready to go?” Anthe said quietly as they mounted their Ikran, the aforementioned Ted, who shuddered lightly as Anthe bonded to her. They leaned over, reaching a hand out to Spider and hoisting him up into their lap when he took it.

“I still can’t believe you named her Ted.” Spider scoffed, setting himself more comfortably against their front, while Anthe made final adjustments before take off.

“Ted is a fine name, and it's better than ‘Cupcake’,” Anthe smiled, gesturing to where Quaritch was mounting up, making Spider snicker. “Or whatever Lyle named his. What was it again? Manly Barber?”

“Malibu Barbie!” Lyle shouted from the back of his mount, sounding offended.

“Why?” Spider asked, not bothering to hide his incredulousness.

“She’s pink!” Lyle gestured to the creature's bright pink and yellow markings. Anthe and Spider looked at eachother, sharing confused shrugs.

“I don’t get it.” Anthe shook their head back at Lyle, who groaned in frustration.

“Barbie! The fashion icon! How do you not know this?!”

“I think it’s an earth thing.” Spider frowned up at Anthe, who was feeling increasingly confused.

“Wainfleet! Quit screwing around! We ready to go?” Quaritch shouted over the bickering. There was a small chorus of ‘yessir’s from the recoms, all mounted and ready on their Ikran. Quaritch signaled take off, launching into the air and taking the lead as Anthe and the other soldiers followed.

#froglet writes fics #avatar way of water #atwow #avatar the way of water #james cameron avatar #neteyam sully #neteyam x oc #avatar frontiers of pandora #neteyam x reader #until it doesn't hurt #navi oc

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musashi · 5 months

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very sorry if youre getting this twice my wifi lost connection the first time i hit send so im asking again in case didnt get through. its a relief to see you say writers block is just a state of mind issue! do you have any advice for people who are still stuck in it to stop being that way? what part of my thinking has to change to get better? and this has nothing to do with the topic but thank you for being one of the few mayomei sickfic writers in western fandom! finally some good fucking food

honestly its a hard thing to advise because i quite literally just brute force 90% of things in my life out of spite. but i think just internalizing it is a good first step?

like. writer's block is. how do i phrase this. it's just a term we have invented for feeling "stuck." which can be useful, except... it has now kind of taken on a life of its own, where people kind of talk about it as if it is... a condition? something that you can "come down with" so to speak. but in reality all it means is that you are stuck. something isn't working.

why are you stuck?

that's the thing to figure out. some people get stuck by many things. some people are only ever stuck via one thing. but when you chalk it up to "writer's block" what you are basically doing is giving yourself an excuse to not examine it further. you are saying to yourself, well, it's writer's block, hopefully it passes soon. and you are taking away the agency from yourself to help it pass, giving yourself over to the whim of it. you are relenting.

i am bad at relenting.

this goes hand in hand with the other thing that annoys me to hear people talk about--"inspiration." a lot of writers consider this to be an opposite of writer's block, so to speak. sometimes its inspiration, sometimes its motivation, but much like with writer's block, they consider it this kinda nebulous cloud that settles over them and oh! suddenly they can create!

this, again, takes away the writer's agency. they are simply at the behest of writer's block and its opposite, motivation. internalizing this mindset pretty much guarantees that your output will stagger. that terrifies me. the idea that i must go long swaths of time waiting to feel "inspired" or "motivated" sounds like hell. writing, creating, making something is what keeps me alive, and i think if i stopped i'd die.

so, once again i reiterate: what writer's block is, is a writer being stuck. the writer needs to unpack why they are stuck. instead of just saying 'oh lol its writer's block' and leaving it at that.

for me, what i thought was "writer's block" was actually perfectionism and a dissatisfaction with how the story looked in my head vs how it came across on paper. i felt the words i was putting on the page did not match the story i wanted to tell, and i would lock up and feel foggy and uninspired. but when i did that, i was angry, because it felt like giving up, and i fucking hate giving up. i hate failing even more than i hate being stumbling and imperfect.

more than that, i was writing nothing. i came to a conclusion: as i grew as a writer, my standards would shift and change. therefore, there will never exist a timeline where i am 100% satisfied and proud of everything i've ever written. furthermore, this paralytic fear of not telling the story i wanted to tell meant i wasn't telling a story at all. i was setting myself up to fail regardless, so i may as well tell a story while i do it.

the choice came down to, write hundreds of shitty words that were not up to my own (impossible) standard, or write nothing and hope and pray that one day i feel "inspired" enough to get the story in my head out. from a purely logistical standpoint, i think anyone can see which outcome is favourable.

and then i wrote stuff. and, uh, it turns out literally no one feels the same about my writing as i do. i think it sucks shit but everyone else LOVES it and thinks its top tier. which, again, just logically that tells me that my opinion is biased--i'm sitting with the story all day, so it looks predictable and uninspired to me. but no one else has that viewpoint. everyone else is just eating that shit like candy. again, just logistically, this makes it a lot easier to talk down the voice in my head that says i'm not making good enough art. i can just give it a chocolate candy and be like, calm down, little thing. clearly i am.

so to loop it back around: writer's block is just a term people use as a crutch to avoid examining why they feel unable to write. i personally found that saying instead what i am actually struggling with literally instead of chalking it up to some nebulous affliction made me a much more productive writer. i have a general word count i want to make every day and regardless of how i'm feeling i try my best to hit it. and thats why i can just write 45645645 fics all the time like it's nothing.

anyways THANK YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i will write mayomei forever if people keep talking to me abt it. they are so precious to me

#wendy rambles #wendy answers

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gracehosborn · 19 days

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WIP Questions Tag

Thank you so much @sunset-a-story for the tag!

Going to answer for The American Icarus: Volume I for this one. May do another for Ink of Destruction later, we’ll see.

What was the first part of your WIP that you created?

I had originally written the first part of a prologue on a whim set the night before Hamilton’s duel with Burr (back when I thought having this story be in one novel was a feasible idea). But a few minutes later I scrapped this because I thought a prologue was stupid. Years later I have gone back and added a prologue, but now it’s in the form of a fictional letter to the reader wherein Alexander explains why he’s sitting down to write his “memoirs”.

If your story was a TV show, what would the intro song be?

I would actually love to have an original piece be composed. I just think that would be more fitting. In an ideal world, I’d love for the task to go to Lindsey Sterling.

Who are your favourite character(s) and why?

As most everyone in Volume I of TAI (and the rest of the series for that matter) are based off of real people, I’ll just be super predictable and say here that I of course find Hamilton super interesting. The man was complex, and getting to explore these complexities through a first-person narrative has been super fun. I get to be in his head and play around with all the gritty details in crafting motivations and stringing real events together into narrative form through his actions.

What other pieces of media could share a fan base with your WIP?

TURN: Washington’s Spies, Hamilton, potentially 1776, though I could see this being wide reaching.

What has been your biggest struggle while writing your WIP?

Oh God. The research, for starters (due in large part to my spite compelling me to go above and beyond what’s necessary), but being a history major who wants to specialize in early American history as it is, I find the struggle here to be more overwhelming than actually difficult. In terms of an actual difficulty, that would be the writing itself. As ironic as that sounds. Having TAI be framed as Hamilton sitting down 200 odd years after his death to write his memoirs means that I have to emulate Hamilton’s actual writing style and oof that’s hard. Also, Alexander Hamilton was very extroverted and I am simply Not That so dialogue is a pain in my ass. 😭

Are there any animals in your story?

Yep! Lots of horses will feature in TAI Volume I. And eventually some dogs (owned by generals Washington, Lee, Howe, and the Baron von Steuben).

How do your characters get around?

This is the 18th century. Everyone’s only options are: ride a horse, get a carriage or coach, procure a boat if on water, or walk. Lots of walking and riding feature here.

What part of your WIP are you working on right now?

I’ve been stuck on this one chapter for months that closes out Alexander’s time studying at King’s College as he decides to drop out to put all his focus towards the artillery company he has been granted command of. I’m super excited to get into Alexander’s time as an artillery captain but man this chapter. It’s the dialogue that’s holding me hostage I fear.

What aspects of your WIP do you think will draw people in?

Oh definitely the premise. If that doesn’t draw people’s attention, I’ll be super shocked. Another aspect I can think of would be the time that the novel spends on the American Revolution in a way that’s vivid and detailed. Beyond that, I’ll just say that name recognition is a powerful thing.

Tagging with no pressure: @kaylinalexanderbooks @meerawrites @thestarsfightagainstusmyfriend @almaprincess66 @rwwinton and anyone else who wants to jump on in.

#tag games #the american icarus #TAI #alexander hamilton #writers on tumblr #writing community #historical fiction #amwriting #amrev

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ticklish-touch · 3 months

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Moving Accounts! Thank You for Everything!

Well, everyone, it's been a good run. But it's time to start fresh.

I now have a strictly NSFW Tumblr account, where I'm going to be posting lewd art and sharing horny thoughts about my OCs, and posting art of other kinks outside of the main ones I've showcased on this account.

So please do not follow if you're squicked by NSFW. It doesn't mean all of my content will be raunchy or erotic in nature, but it's still for kink stuff.

Much like a few friends and mutuals of mine, I've become jaded by the Tumblr TK community overall. But I'm 31 years old, and I will not let myself continue to feel ashamed of being into kink, or feel like I have to keep it on the down-low.

You can also find me on Bluesky and Pillowfort!

I won't delete this account, I just won't be active on it anymore! I still want to keep it as a sort of time capsule. Just know that I will no longer be accepting asks, submissions, or DMs here. Thank you so much again to everyone who has stuck around ❤️

You're all awesome. Thank you for making these past ten or so years worthwhile, even in spite of drama and roadblocks along the way.

Never stop finding reasons to laugh. 💖

((DISCLAIMER: Because I won't be active here anymore, I won't be coming back to keep tabs on ppl who like & reblog my stuff. Keep in mind that I still do not condone minors interacting with my content. Please please please respect my boundaries, whether you come across this account or take a look at my new one. Thank you!!))

#psa #moving account #new account #goodbye #thank you #thank you for everything

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dreaminginthedeepsouth · 5 months

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Here is my annual Thanksgiving piece, on why we say Grace:

We didn’t say grace at our house when I was growing up because my parents were atheists. I knew even as a little girl that everyone at every table needed blessings and encouragement, but my family didn’t ask for it. Instead, my parents raised glasses of wine to the chef: Cheers. Dig in. But I had a terrible secret, which was that I believed in God, a divine presence who heard me when I prayed, who stayed close to me in the dark. So at six years old I began to infiltrate religious families like a spy—Mata Hari in plaid sneakers.

One of my best friends was a Catholic girl. Her boisterous family bowed its collective head and said, “Bless us, O Lord, and these thy gifts. …” I was so hungry for these words; it was like a cool breeze, a polite thank-you note to God, the silky magnetic energy of gratitude. I still love that line.

I believed that if your family said grace, it meant you were a happy family, all evidence to the contrary. But I saw at certain tables that an improvised grace could cause friction or discomfort. My friend Mark reports that at his big southern childhood Thanksgivings, someone always managed to say something that made poor Granny feel half dead. “It would be along the lines of ‘And Lord, we are just glad you have seen fit to keep Mama with us for one more year.’ We would all strain to see Granny giving him the fisheye.”

I noticed some families shortened the pro forma blessing so they could get right to the meal. If there were more males than females, it was a boy- chant, said as one word: “GodisgreatGodisgoodletusthankHimforourfoodAmen.” I also noticed that grace usually wasn’t said if the kids were eating in front of the TV, as if God refused to listen over the sound of it.

And we’ve all been held hostage by grace sayers who use the opportunity to work the room, like the Church Lady. But more often, people simply say thank you—we understand how far short we must fall, how selfish we can be, how self-righteous, what brats. And yet God has given us this marvelous meal.

It turns out that my two brothers and I all grew up to be middle-aged believers. I’ve been a member of the same Presbyterian church for 36 years. My older brother became a born-again Christian—but don’t ask him to give the blessing, as it can last forever. I adore him, but your food will grow cold. My younger brother is an unconfirmed but freelance Catholic.

So now someone at our holiday tables always ends up saying grace. I think we’re in it for the pause, the quiet thanks for love and for our blessings, before the shoveling begins. For a minute, our stations are tuned to a broader, richer radius. We’re acknowledging that this food didn’t just magically appear: Someone grew it, ground it, bought it, baked it; wow.

We say thank you for the miracle that we have stuck together all these years, in spite of it all; that we have each other’s backs, and hilarious companionship. We say thank you for the plentiful and outrageous food: Kathy’s lox, Robby’s heartbreaking gravy. We pray to be mindful of the needs of others. We savor these moments out of time, when we are conscious of love’s presence, of Someone’s great abiding generosity to our dear and motley family, these holy moments of gratitude. And that is grace.

Anne Lamott

#Thanksgiving #Anne Lamott #essay #thankful #grace #prayers

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anewkindofme · 27 days

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Thank you for the tag @im-overstimulated-and-im-sad.

Here is another look at the "April retakes her boards" one shot in the "My Boy" verse.

---

April adjusts her ponytail as she walks into the seemingly empty resident locker room. She has just enough time to apply some more concealer, something she’s in desperate need of. Much of last night was spent studying and now she’s working a double. Her energy is still high, but she knows her face paints a different story.

She’s halfway to her locker when she hears some hushed voices a few rows away. In spite of how soft Vikram Roy attempts to be, his words echo throughout the room.

“I booked my flight for next month.”

Another male resident, one April doesn’t recognize comes next. “Yeah, me too. I think everyone in our class has. Got stuck by the bathroom.”

Roy scoffs. “My seat sucks too. You know, I heard a few got booked in first class.”

“Well, we all can’t be so lucky to have daddies who are chief of trauma.”

April pauses, her hand hovering over her makeup bag. She tries to still her breathing so she doesn’t give herself away. Roy and his friend carry on, proving their ignorance to her standing just a few rows away.

“God, how does she even still have a job here?” Roy asks, disgust in his voice. “She failed. You think if we don’t make it they’ll give us a second chance?”

“Nope. Because again, Daddy’s Princess walks around here like she runs the hospital.”

April’s cheeks burn as tears pick up in her eyes. She puts her hand over her mouth. This isn’t the first time someone has mocked her or her cousins for their dads being chiefs. She knows they’re just jealous and none of it has merit. They all get held accountable, especially Alex. It doesn’t change the stigma. One she’ll likely never shake.

“It just makes no sense,” Roy continues. “We’ve all seen her break down at the smallest things. How’s she going to handle it when she’s alone in an OR? Her daddy won’t be there to hold her hand forever.”

“As if she’s even going to pass. Hopefully, this time Chief Shepherd cans her ass.”

April clasps her hand tighter to hold back a sob.

---

No pressure tag: @cianmarstoo, @actualalligator, @kingofdarkness00 & @snowviolettwhite

#wip wednesday #my boy verse #little april kepner #caregiver owen hunt

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wonderloste · 1 year

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DEAR ALICE ... IN SHORT , HAPPY NEW YEAR FROM THOSE OF US IN WONDERLAND TO YOU , OUTSIDER ! / OH SHIT ANOTHER NEW YEARS POST FROM SOMEONE ON YOUR DASH ?! yes, that's me! i don't want to ramble too long, but i do want to thank everyone who has supported me on this blog over the past year & especially with how chaotic it's been on my end. i know my activity hasn't been great this year and i've been struggling a lot, but i still appreciate so much the people who have stuck by me & still interacted with me despite all the stuff i've been going through. <4 being here & talking to everyone & getting in interactions where i could has helped make 2022 a better and less lonely year than it would have been, otherwise.

i'm so sorry to people who i've let down when it comes to interactions & getting back to them through messages and whatnot. 2022 was genuinely such a rough year for me, but i am infinitely more grateful that in spite of those things, so many of you have still decided to stick with me. this blog was... so ambitious when i made it & i honestly didn't think i'd make it this far or that anyone would have any interest in a bunch of random furry ocs KJNEMRKHJM. i was just a fan of otome with a will to roleplay & a dream :') but you all have given so much love to these ocs and i can't thank you enough.

i hope that moving forward i'm able to interact with more of you!! and to continue interactions with those i've already started them with!! or rekindle ones that got caught up in my absence. thank you so much for your patience with me, & for sticking around! i hope you all have a HAPPY HAPPY NEW YEAR & that 2023 is kind to us!!

now let's point some fingers under the cut ehehehehe.

— FAMNESIA ... my little discord group clowns ! most of us have been in the discord for like, what? 6 years now? or smth? we spend pretty much every day together, both on & off tumblr rp so !

@londonfallen › ew it's my fiance AAAAAAAA MICHAEL. thank you so much for everything you do for me on this blog!! i'm so thankful to you, it's partially thanks to you this darn thing even exists. you rlly do fund so much content on here & i'm always thankful to have you participate in lore & art uwu i know this year has been especially rough on us, but hopefully 2023 will help us get back on our feet & you'll find your will to keep writing !! you've been doing so good lately look at you go <4 you rose out of the dead for silas and gave him love at first sight can u believe it... your blog & lore has so much thought put into it, i wish you'd be kinder to yourself and less mean to the things you create. your art & writing is beautiful u should be bragging on the dash 24/7 about how cool you are, actually. ily thank u for making the year better even when it was miserable on us, we're going to have the most disgusting wedding ever one day when we can afford mickey mouse wedding us before the eyes of kami-sama, our lord and savior mr. walt disney!!

@kusaranai › your ass doesn't even log onto tumblr anymore biancnya so i'll have to link this to your dms BUT I'M INCLUDING YOU ANYWAYS BC I CAN NEVER MAKE THESE POSTS WITHOUT YOU. i love u my wonderful furry waifu !! by wonderful i mean cursed and by waifu i mean the sleep paralysis demon i see when i get choked out in phasmophboia. my career on tumblr really blossomed when you came into my life and ruined it uwu and it will continue to blossom now that u are long gone and only annoy me on discord ! SOMEWHERE LIGHT AND KUMA LIVE ON. somewhere, even more importantly, i still have light telling kurisu that he loves her shoved into my drafts on an abandoned blog...

@galaxiasus › THE SMOL OF THE GROUP AAAAAAAAA LUNYA. i'm so glad that you've been around more often this year, even though it's been hard on everyone bc 2022 was phew. man it sure was huh. KJNERHKJN as always i'm so glad seeing you on my dash but i'm even more glad that you've actually remained active icb it </4 ur the only person who didn't abandon me on tumblr for 5 years until ren joined us, we were the sole beacons of rp together for a long while and we have so many good ships bc of it!! you're such a joy to write with and your writing is amazing 10/10 idc wtf you say lmfao. i'm so glad i got to rejoin famnesia and reconnect with you and i look forward to holding ur hair back while u scream cry throw up at the end of endwalker !! i'm sorry i'm so slow with dms but rest assured seeing u screaming in them always brightens my day

@zorkaya › REN REN REN REN aaaaaaaaaaaaa. did u know i used to be scared of you when i was a wee little unicorn... many blogs ago... tragic KEJRNHM. I'M SO GLAD that you joined the famnesia server and got to talk with all of us more often!! ofc we've been friends by proxy for a good couple years, but i'm happier to get the chance to talk to you more consistently / often :') you're such a sweet and super cool person, and your writing is so good !! thank u for teaching my fiance and my cohealer how to write pr0n. uwu zarina is such a beautiful & well developed character!! i'm so proud of you for picking up a strong female villain and sticking with her even though the rpc can be whiny when it comes to them. zarina DESERVES to be op and anyone who cries about it is a weak baby bitch. i look forward to writing more with you moving forward !! on all blogs !! with all my muses !!! take the whole roster idc

@eidetic187 › HI VERONICA UR ALSO NEW IN THESE PARTS, i'm just as glad to see you among our msging chaos throughout the day !! even though our schedules are different bc you're on night shift, it's always fun to wake up and see what's transpired in chat lmFAO. finally someone who appreciates the visual novel classics just like me !! kicks really cursed dating sims under the rug so that they cannot be seen. we don't look at those. we're all super glad to have you around partaking in all our discussions and i hope that the next year is kinder to you in every possible way !! also that you and your partner have a hella good new year together once you get out of work and are able to chill together :') we've been mutuals for like 500 years i feel like you were on my first follow forever tm {remember those} on monokuma and u will be on the last one when tumblr burns

@hakureimaiden › omg u came back just in time to force me to write more ppl on this post icb it /j IRMA WELCOME BACK TO THE HELLSITE i've been here on my lonesome for so long except the occasional showing of michael and luna, it's nice to see one of the og muses has survived since the disney murder game days... as always you are a pleasure on both the dash And in the chat!! you brought a lot of really neat friends together by merging our groups together and it's made things super fun getting into xiv and stuff with you!! i'm not always the most :') timely ship partner when it comes to msgs with how whack i've been this year, but i'm hoping wITH NEW ENERGY IN 2023 we can develop romesen... carmeo.... yeah carmeo, WE CAN DEVELOP THEM MORE KJERNHM. regina george is romeo's type? man. would not have guessed. UR SUCH A SWEET CHILL PERSON I HOPE U KNOW FAMNESIA FISTBUMPS WITH U.

@rotinthedark › HALEEEEEEEEEEY i know talking thru groups and stuff isn't ur thing and i'm naturally quiet on discord BUT U STILL GET TO BE HERE because :') we have worked so very hard for the sebalex ship and they are FINALLY making headway and i'm so excited for it!! alex? having a crush on seb? it is a-go, we are THERE, we have MADE IT KEJRNHM you're such a nice & fun person to talk to, and i absolutely ADORE writing with you!! sometimes our interactions are what keeps my love for stardew alive just bc i have like 500 hrs on it and sometimes i'm like broe what else can i even do... i can log on and reply to haley... that's what i can do... i had never thought of sebalex as a ship too srsly until writing with you and now it CONSUMES me i am broken. pls.

— SPECIAL ALICES ...

@dangaer › hi jupiter <4 i want u to know that your blog is one of my favs on this hellsite, i hope you know that the way you write ALL of your muses is so very pleasing to read. all their characterizations are genuinely SO GOOD. i've mentioned it before but even characters i didn't like much or just didn't consider v often are characters you've made me care about just seeing you talk about / write them on the dash!! like ofc i am so intensely biased to the amnesia muses bc that otome has... a very special place in my heart but despite what our rp history may make u think!!! i have played others!! KJNEMRH and your characters are SPOT ON, always, without fail. i love our ships & threads / interactions, even though i can be slow getting to stuff !!! the dynamic we've built up with ikki and darcy is one of my favs, i love them SO MUCH and idk i just think. they're like. kinda valid for wanting to destroy wonderland and stay together. the normal ending? a good option. i support them. i can't WAIT to see aleister and kageyuki's dynamic grow likewise, i know i'm going to love it just as much!! thank you so much for writing with me & support my dumb otome ocs :') i know they aren't a Real Otome, but it is v sweet to be indulged as if they are. i'm in tears rn actively.

@redemptioninterlude › HENLO FRIEND u might be surprised to find yourself here, but :') i do keep up with your blog quite often actually. i know that i've dropped the ball on interactions a lot, this year has been so... much for me, & my activity really suffered, but i want you to know that i LOVE your blog!! and all of what we HAVE done together! and while i love alice specifically, for obvs reasons, i do also read your other threads / dynamics that you put on the dash and pls know that your writing slaps KJNERHM literally there's never a miss, from rue euphoria to ur interesting and well developed ocs, all of them are written in a way that's so amazing to read. you take such a diverse cast & breathe so much life into them, and i'm very lucky to be able to perceive your content when it gets posted. i hope in 2023 we're able to interact together more frequently !! :squeezes my wonderlandians like they're squeaky toys: i want to get a handle on my content SO BADLY and get stuff going with you again, on god !!

@heincus › maaaaaax i already yelled as you over your muses a lot, but i'll yell again!! so help me after i get moved into my new apartment after the holidays i would LOVE to figure out some match ups / dynamics between our muses because all your ocs have so much love / care put into them and they're all SO MUCH fun!! i love how much passion you have for writing, and how boundless your imagination is. ocs are HARD to write, you have to come up with a lot and juggle world building and character building and all the things, but you make it look so effortless :') your roster is full of so many colorful and expansive personalities and stories. i want to pick them up like barbie dolls and throw them at whatever the fuck weirdos are on my own roster and simply see what sticks. the possibilities? endless. rlly though your writing is so good, you should be proud of what you've created on your blog and i am so glad that i get to interact with you during times i'm not awol lying dead in a ditch ty <4

@galaxylimbs › BANGS POTS AND PANS TOGETHER AAAAAAA u may not think it because my replies are slow as hell rn, but i love our ships HI HELLO EKJNHM. from code vein to oc otome hell, i'm so glad to see you back around again!! know that even though i can take 10 years to reply to things, i do absolutely love the dynamics we have with deirdre / magnus and louis / belle. it's such a joy getting to write with you, and i am SO DETERMINED to give you more ship content this upcoming year. i'm happy as well that louis and belle are back, they're such a fantastic duo and i have... so many emotions over code vein to this day, i'm excited to get back into exploring that world with you :') just as well getting to expand on deirdre and magnus's interactions, the potential is untapped !! thank u for sticking around and writing with me friend aaa

— FLOWERS IN THE GARDENS ... i love seeing you all on my dash! it's likely i've left you on read at some point or shoved our drafts in my box, but please know there's no lack of interest on my part. perhaps we haven't interacted at all, but unbeknownst to you, i see you on the dash all the time & you've left an impression. either way, i adore seeing you around & i absolutely want to interact with you!! thank you so much for brightening up my day with your writing. although i may be quiet, i notice u, and i am a fan kjenrhmkjernhm.

@untowonder / @innocenceimpulse / @seeasunset / @snowfeathered / @starlit-heir / @vibraea / @aceparagon / @jardinae / @tvrningout / @swerte / @aetherbled / @pluviacuratio / @synthwealth / @decoresca / @wishngs / @hymnblood / @tricksheart / @strywoven / @xdcwntherabbithole / @mcmcntomorii / @frestoniia / @reapcrbunny / @double-knots / @acandlelitdeath / @jaxxmulti / @tellescope / @hiisfire / @crownedveil / @shrapnelsong / @box-of-characters / @xamassed / XOXO TO U ALL !!

HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYONE!!

#ʚ o. out of character ɞ ⁄ otome games are my thirteenth reason.

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