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dittydipity · 10 months

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finally got around to finishing the finale of the ghost trick remaster. i've played and watched this ending more times than i can count but it's still so SO good.

all of my insane thoughts and overanalysis/overthinking under the cut

when the last portion/chapter of a game or book is called 'final chapter' or the title of the story.. GRRRRRRGRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR

when the four of them are discussing what to do and they're like "we might not be able to change your fate of dying" and yomiel is just. "i can accept that." 😭😭

^ HE SAYS WITH A SMILE. AUGH.

man no matter how many times i see it, yomiel getting flung back and impaled on the post never fails to make me flinch

ough.

These long, lonely ten years…

you were my one and only friend.

How about it?

Do you remember now...

*spotlight, the reveal*

...old friend?

SCREAMING CRYING SOBBING THROWING UP THE WAY THIS STORY IS TOLD

NOT TRAUMA KICKING IN 😭

he finally rember after so long of forgor...

and then the whole retelling of the story by sissel and yomiel where they narrate interchangeably without any indication of who is talking but you can still tell who's narrating hewioagljadsklfajds

Somebody, please reach a hand out to me... //

My body wouldn't move, but I still managed to reach out a "hand" to him.

ueueueue them finding the comfort they sought and needed in each other because at our cores, we all need connections..

catboy yomiel real and canon

Those ten years were very happy for me.

But they weren't happy for the man...

and there was nothing I could do for him.

^ LINE THAT PEOPLE DO NOT TALK ABOUT ENOUGH. god these lines hit so hard bc it's like. when all you want is for someone you love to be happy and you're trying your hardest and you're giving everything but you just don't know and you just can't understand that there just isn't any way for you to help, no matter how much you want to..

man just. imagine that when you finally think you're going to be free. that after so many years of limbo you think you're finally going to get what you've wanted. and when you get to the final steps of your plan, you find that your best friend, the only person keeping you afloat throughout this whole time, just died. because of you.

AUGHGGHHGHGHGGHHG GOD. GOD GOD GOD.

THE UNIMAGINABLE GRIEF AND REGRET. AND THE KNOWLEDGE THAT YOU WILL HAVE TO EXIST UNTIL THE END OF TIME WITH THESE BURDENS

jowd being the one to say this is so good. bc out of all the people, he might be the one that understands yomiel the most. yomiel's entire goddamn existence and everything he's believed and been forced to endure has finally been righted. jowd's own predicament and resulting fate change from this whole ordeal is also incredibly drastic, but that's what makes him the one who most closely relates to yomiel. yomiel's twisted, revenge-fueled desire to make jowd feel the same pain he felt turns into empathy and understanding.

I'M CRAZY. I'M CRAZZY

do you ever think about how, for the 4 of them (sissel, yomiel, jowd, missile), they have 20 years of memories overlapping each other in a 10y period? if not more, from all the rewinding and trial error of this one night? when they "return" to the new present that is born from this final aversion of fate, do they just find themselves in a completely different place in life, with a whole entire set of memories? do they just. slide "back" into place in this new timeline and replace the placeholder version of them that existed in those 10y that were completely changed, all of a sudden now with all of that version's memories and experiences?

how disorienting and confusing and discombobulating would that be, to suddenly have two completely different versions of the same period of time in your head

it's not as bad for missile, since he's only two years old when the events of the game happen, and so "only" has 2y worth of memories that overlap, but for sissel and yomiel and jowd...

and the fact that only the four of them will remember. sissel and missile are fine, as animals, but for yomiel and jowd.. how often did the people around them think they were insane, talking about things that never happened and knowing things that they shouldn't know, breaking down over things that remind them of this overwritten timeline

When we go back, our fates will no longer be interconnected.

It will be like we never met...

hiweoaghlkjadslkfjkl and in that new timeline, yomiel's one and only friend, the only being he could have called a friend in those years of limbo from the previous timeline, now has nothing to do with him.

and so before that happens, he has to apologize for everything he made sissel go through. even though sissel chose to stay by his side, it's only human nature to feel guilty for something you can't help. he needs this solace.

and sissel gives it to him.

all these four can do is hope that the stars will align and the gods that started this whole mess will allow them to meet once again

-> RAY. DON'T EVEN GET ME STARTED ON RAY.

these have to be some of the most genuine, heartfelt lines in the game, alongside the thanks that yomiel gives sissel.

not me getting sad about ray's reluctance to even talk about himself. oh boy.

his reluctance to reveal just how much he messed up and failed. how hard he tried and how much he's sacrificed just to help his friends. telling this almost complete outsider how much of a failure he was and expecting them to understand his selfish, selfish reasons

can you imagine? waiting for 10 years to pin all your hopes and sacrifices on this stranger that didn't stop to give you the time of day the first time. and if they don't help you this time, everything would have been for nothing. having to just stand back and watch as everything happens this second time around because you can't risk messing it up this time.

doing all of this knowing that, whether things work out or not this time, you're going to disappear at the end.

Of course!

Because that's what doggies do!

🥺🥺🥺🥺😭

the wave of relief and satisfaction when reincarnation starts..

From just that single night as a human, I got a glimpse into their world.

And I learned something...

Their fates, their lives - they were all interconnected...

Somewhere, somehow, in some way.

And, now, this is MY new fate.

literally just in awe at this story.

the reveal of sissel's new fate w the next lines.. one of the most fulfilling, complete endings and feelings of closure i've ever gotten from a game.

It suits me just fine to curl up and watch...

...watch the strange and beautiful patterns of their lives as they unfold.

And it looks like...

...I'll have plenty to watch

here for quite a while.

and the credits song kicking in.. the way it's timed perfectly with the final reveal and snaps to the main theme in time with the end of sissel's speech. it's SO satisfying.

and the fact that the credits song is a remix of the main theme that we've heard so much throughout the game as a way to end each chapter with a sense of mystery, but this final time, it's triumphant. it's the same tune but this time we've solved everything. everything is going to be okay.

i love you ghost trick

#once again copypasted from discord ramblings #if you havent played or seen ghost trick DON'T LOOK #gt one of the games EVER.#.d #ghost trick #ghost trick spoilers

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aihoshiino · 6 months

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what did serina think of goro can you explain their relationship

Gorou and Sarina's relationship is interesting because it's kind of deceptively simple while being unintentionally complicated by the mountains of baggage they were both unintentionally bringing to things. Sarina -> Gorou is pretty straightforward though; as the one person who was by her side when she had nobody else in the world, he was her light and she obviously adored him. DeviousChair on the OnK subreddit also made a really good point a while back that we know that Sarina had issues with memory loss as her tumor progressed and so past a certain point, her strongest and most immediate memories would have been of Gorou caring for her. This does a lot to inform why she latched onto him and Ai with the intensity that she did, imo; past a certain point they were basically the only consistent comforting presences in her life.

The Ichibanboshi no Spica novel was a bit of a miss for me for various reasons but something it did (however accidentally) that I really liked was emphasizing the way that Gorou was basically everything and everyone to her from her POV, just out of emotional necessity: at various points across the story she compares him to a friend, an older brother, her parents (by contrasting him against them) and, of course, as her crush. I think this confused muddying of feelings and not knowing exactly what to make of their relationship rings really true and makes a lot of sense because like... how do you define a relationship like that? Especially since he wasn't her actual doctor, he was just the emotional support middle aged guy who would hang out with her and have nerdy chats LOL. Sarina had nobody so Gorou had to be her everybody.

That said, while this connection is sweet there's also an unfortunate but tbh inevitable angle of codependency as well. Since Gorou is her everything, if he's gone then she has nothing. Spica touches on this briefly but we see it most clearly in Ruby at the end of the Private arc and going into Mainstay. Even in a life where all of her dreams have come true, where she has a caring and present family and a robust support system of people who love her, she has so many hopes and so much of her emotional well-being riding on the *idea* of Gorou that being faced with a permanent separation from him contributes to a mental health spiral so catastrophic that only Gorou himself seemingly returning to her can hit pause on it.

It probably goes without saying, but this is an insanely unhealthy level of attachment to have to someone! Obviously, everything to do with Aqua and Ruby's mental health is complicated by their unique circumstances and their losing Ai at such a young age but again: this is Ruby 16+ years out from last seeing him, who has grown up surrounded by people who love and support her and her mental wellbeing is still this dependent on the idea of Gorou and she's still convincing herself that she can have her end goal of being in a relationship with him.

@aquahater made a really excellent post touching on this angle of Ruby's clinging onto the idea of Gorou, characterizing it (imo, correctly) as Ruby basically just wanting to live her life as 'Sarina 2.0' and rejecting any changes or emotionally inconvenient truths that could prevent that from happening. It's totally understandable why she would want this and I can't even say I blame her for it... but she does need to accept that it isn't going to work out the way she so obviously hopes it is.

#oshi no ko #oshi no posting #ruby hoshino

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sevicia · 3 months

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give me the movie recs instead! scary is ok

LET'S GOOOOOOOOOOOO!!! Under a read more cause I looove talking, and the sections are ordered by like, priority of recommendation if that makes sense ... I also tried 2 actually rank them but I am not very good @ that LOL

Personal Enjoyment ONLY!!!:

No theme besides personal enjoyment "just for fun"/not relatable edition:

The Batman - I love it I just love it. I watched it bc my sister put it on and my pen's battery had run out. I was CLUELESS

Spree - That's my attention whore wife that would kill me for views !!!!!!

Jacob's Ladder - The best fever dream anyone could ever ask for !!! Everything about this movie is perfect. And this doesn't really matter TOO much ....... BUT …….. !!!! Tim Robbins in short shorts towards the end .......... save meeeee .................

Antiviral - I rewatched this one just before writing this LOL. It made me crazy when I first saw it back in 2022 and it makes me crazy now too!! The entire movie feels cold & sterilized but it's still Completely Sexual. Syd March I know what you are. OH also I like to think Mr. Cronenberg Sir is proud of his son bc this ruuuuules

Martyrs - This is like the ultimate "can't rec it as-is" movie bc of the amount of people that are genuinely disturbed by it & don't get me wrong I am one of them!! But there's just something here that has me thinking about it so often. The violence is amazing and the feeling in my stomach is horrible every time !!

No theme besides personal enjoyment mental illness edition:

Pulse (AKA Kairo) - Extremely close to my heart, the way loneliness relates to the internet & technology in general is such an interesting topic it would be enough to make this movie stand out for anyone, but I have such a personal fondness for it because of how much I felt it understood me. In a few ways.

Pearl - IDGAF how many people have gone "just like me fr" cause I am also one of them. I don't get the whole "female rage" thing that gets mentioned a ton (on account of me being some guy), but the theme of never being able to escape a life you hate ??? Absolutely fucking terrifying & hits super hard for me specifically

What Ever Happened to Baby Jane? - The RESENTMENT, the ANGER, the DESPAIR !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! It resonated w/ me a lot more in the past but not so much anymore, which is good LOL

HORROR!! YAY!!:

Horror SERIOUS edition:

The Thing - certified classic I legit think everyone should watch this one at least once in their lives. The practical effects r amazing, the story is GRIPPING & many of the actors r hot. Literally what else could u ask for…..

Hellraiser - Huge DUH ….. The short story is so good too Mr. Clive Barker I owe you my life !!!!!

The House That Jack Built - Pretentious, yes! But also really fun/satisfying to watch. I've seen some people comment on this kinda movie being typical for the director? But IDK who that man is & I don't care either. Like at all.

Ringu - Just a classic. So creepy I have to hype myself up to watch it LOL

Persona - INSAAAAANE INSANE INSANE. I saw someone say it's toxic yuri which like. Yeah I think. But also it left me confused in a rly good way

Noroi: The Curse - honestly should be self-explanatory @ this point. GENUINELY scared the shit outta me

Repulsion - Also a drama (besides a horror), the way the main character's paranoia escalates is just .... haunting, I think is the word. There's some degree of irony in here, because of who the director is, that I can't really articulate.

Gorefest / not too serious:

Creep - INSANE found footage about a guy making decisions that seem questionable if not stupid to most people, but not to me. I understand him. (disclaimer that this one could also go in the prev. category ..... I don't knowwww)

Intruder - I was on a slasher kick a few years back and this was one of the better ones. The convenience store setting is so much fun & something I'd never seen before! Or since.

Rec - SOOOO anxiety inducing, there's a lot of moments where people r talking/yelling over each other & the part towards the end that explains the whole thing is just. 0_0. to me. Bc it's among the top 3 things I do NOT fuck with !!! (same disclaimer as w/ Creep).

Hostel - I actually really like this one & don't understand most of the criticisms besides the obvious misogyny. It irks me a lot that it gets called "torture porn" so often when it's just … not that bad ? As edgy as that sounds !!

Cube - go there. in the cube? go in the cube.

The Poughkeepsie Tapes - Zero excuses for this one, you just gotta embrace your shit taste sometimes

Terrifier - Separate from the 2nd one cause that one is different in more than a few ways ..... but this one is just like charming to me in a weird way. It 's fucking filthy like, visually tho cause of the abandoned building & other such things ....

Terrifier 2 - This one I also enjoyed a lot though it IS really really long, I found it fun! The whole family aspect of it I liked a lot bc fictional siblings my beloved :3 though Art's backstory is still rly muddy (4 me at least) I do think it's like, a fun silly slasher if you've got 2 hrs and a lot of patience LOL

Just fun overall!!:

YAY!!!!!!!!!:

ROBOTS !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! - Oh my GOD I love this movie. I love this movie so much it's probably my favorite childhood movie. It's funny as fuck, really pretty AND has a good story. IK it may sound like nostalgia's involved but I just truly believe it's an amazing movie<3

Birds of Prey - This one is just a serotonin machine for me I love Harley so so muchh

Wendell & Wild - Visually insane I looove the look of this movie. It's also just rly enjoyable, I watched it multiple times at one point since it's on Netflix I think ? My mom got sick of it LOL

Bottoms - Absolutely bonkers it's such a fun movie. Gay and untalented and ugly and yet one of the most lovable movies I've ever seen ?? They need to print more of these

A Trip to Infinity - This one's actually a documentary on um. Infinity. Which is lovely because watching scientists be enthusiastic about their work and gush about it is just so good for my brain + it made me cry

The nostalgia I have 4 these ones is craaazy:

The Butterfly Effect - this was on TV SO OFTEN it was insane. I watched it so many times as a kid I always insisted on not changing the channel

The Voices - SO fun & silly I think of it so fondly .....

Paranorman - I love this movie so so much forever it's just so beautiful & funny

Zombieland - It's just fun man IDK what else to tell u

Sucker Punch - Another one that was often on TV, it's just embedded in my memory forever. I learned what a lobotomy was bc of this movie!!

MISC!!!:

These are dramas !!:

Parasite - Just watch it if u haven't. Everyone says you should watch it and they're RIGHT !!!

The Devils - I love horny church stuff so much

Let the Right One In - fucking loved this one. Freezing cold, very pretty AND probably the best vamp movie I've ever seen. Though I haven't seen a lot

Girl, Interrupted - insane behavior from the girls here but they're literally in a psych ward so who cares

These r good but I don't remember them much SOB:

The Eyes Of My Mother - this one gets called slow/boring a lot but I really don't gaf I still liked it

Wolf Creek 1 + 2

The Descent

Phenomena - The 1st game of the Clock Tower series was based on/inspired by this movie! Nothing else 2 say I just think it's cool lol

American Mary

A Clockwork Orange - I watched this nearly an entire decade ago but it goes here because of the fact that sometimes I still hear that dumb cunt Alex DeLarge go "I've suffered, and I've suffered, and I've suffered!" inside my head a lot. Also I have to mention that he did look good beaten up despite everything going on w/ him.

#danties #long post #literally so so fucking long I'm sorryyyyyyyyyyy .................................................. it's my verbose soul ..................#much to think about #<- thoughts were displayed

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s0n-of-may · 2 years

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3:00am - 01/07/2022

Honestly it has passed so much time since the last time I wrote something in here. My life has changed completely and this place became just a memory of a point in time of my life, a "turning point" in a way.

I felt like a need again some place to vent about stuff that I don't feel like I have someone to talk to about. Even though I'm surrounded by amazing people, there are things that I don't think they would care much about, and are things that I care much about. And other thing is that my English writing was SO MUCH BETTER back when I used this as a diary, so, I'll consider this study also.

Today the news that my favorite gaming Youtuber Technoblade have passed away came, and man, it sure hit hard. I started watching his content in 2020, first year of the pandemic and it was a great relief from all the anxiety and the insanity I felt the world was on. He more than anyone ignited my passion for Minecraft (and gaming) again and almost everything I know about the game, I learned by watching him. He was battling cancer since last year and for a couple months, there was no sign of him. I feared something was wrong but optimistically thought he was just taking care of himself and taking his time to heal and cure. But unfortunately he passed.

Grief is an interesting thing and even though I'm quite mature, I still don't really understand it, not because I don't consciously know what it is and what it means, but my guess is that I fear what might be on the other side of life, if there is one. I'm agnostic so I don't really have a religion or a specific belief on this, but emotionally I want an afterlife to exist, a place where people can exist, can really feel free and complete. I guess that the ignorance that comes from living life on this existence is forever a source of doubt and insecurity.

Last year I also lost my grandfather. It was and still is painful as hell and honestly I don't feel like grief will ever end, it just became a part of my life, to feel his absence every single day in the most mundane of things. I regret the things I haven't done for him while he was here, things that could have been happy memories of us, and it hurts. I guess when people say to cherish the moments and our loved ones while they're still here is about this.

I don't really understand how my life is and where it is going, and I don't know if I'm wrong about this or not but right now I feel like I don't have anyone to talk about these things. I should return to therapy but right now I'm a mess financially, I can't even afford to buy new underwear (and boy I do need some) but I really could use some counseling right now.

I should sleep, because in about 3 hours I have to go to college, but these things were screaming in my mind and I felt like I needed to vent about it. If someone is ever going to read this I have no idea, specially someone who know me (they'll probably think why the hell I'm writing in English) but, who cares? Life makes little sense after all. I just hope it can be better someday.

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renticat · 1 month

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Sick of being innocent sick of being ignorant

It's my birthday week but I still fucking miss y̶o̶u̶ , cross that I mean sugar (gosh I really hope there is striketrough on my keyboard) but yeah it's okay I guess. I think you can't see my post that I labelled as mature unless you logged into tumblr so yeah it's pity (cause I guess you wouldn't bother to do that) but I am afraid if I don't label "not safe for meow" post I could get banned from here.

Why can't I make my own gifs from video I like though, it's so hard I tried but it does not work as I expected and then I quick to give up, just like what you did to me. Lol but seriously damn.

Goodbye ballerina dreams. Fuck I don't want to be ballerina, I want idk back then singing dancing playing theatre but ofc 𝙖𝙡𝙨𝙤 get some bread 𝙖𝙣𝙙 not just for fun. It's fun until it's exhausting (even make all this shitty nonsense) unless I am in mood and my mood has been good but I am so lonely and then I cried my pussy's out. Okay that's not the words obviously but I feel so empty, like no matter what I do it will ended up the same way.

tragic ironic fate of my every romantic bullshit

I never told anyone why I hate my date of birth unless to this someone and now that's someone think I am fucking insane thus he's gone I guess. See you can't understand the POV of someone's else unless you've been there on their shoes (or you have so much empathy) but people can only have it so much, still background of information never been enough, I mean background of feeling. Trauma bonding, that's when people wrote so much on YouTube's comment section. I do really understand as I ever been in some of their plot, but some of it also I can't relate that deep as I never been in that state. Is like when my friend told me how 𝐚𝐦𝐚𝐳𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐢𝐭 𝐢𝐬 𝐰𝐡𝐞𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐲 𝐰𝐞𝐫𝐞 𝐢𝐧 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐬𝐩𝐞𝐧𝐝 𝐭𝐢𝐦𝐞 𝐭𝐨𝐠𝐞𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐢𝐫 𝐜𝐫𝐮𝐬𝐡 come on, I don't understand cause I have no experience of it until I did and I do get the butterflies on my stomach type of shit.

I tell you a secret, I do get butterflies on my chest also when there's so much emotion, esp anger and disappointment, fear of losing someone because I know sooner or later it will happen. It's like I am falling from the top of the cliff but the bottom is sooo high so it's just falling down and I don't know whether it will be hard ground or still water waiting for me. That feeling hit me so fucking often compared to that butterflies on my stomach, so tell me how love is so hurt and I only feel the sweet things for so little of time.

And I thought the cure was to kill all the feelings but then I was so wrong. You can't just ignore the reflection on the mirror just because you hate it. It stares back harder than ever, I swear sometimes when I look into the mirror long enough without blinking, I feel like my own reflection is so disappointed and ready to just kill me, but she won't because she won't give me what I want and the end is what I truly want.

She didn't want a break. She want an ending and final period when you can't turn the page anymore because it's over and now it's time to return the book to its shelves.

It's tiring to keep waiting but then when the time is coming, shit is happening over and over again. It's just too much too soon, I am never ready. My heart is so fragile because I never have the good fondation of confidence, as you know that's the worst thing child abuse can do, it's like no matter how okay you are now (and it's worse when it's actually you're not that okay) you aren't even safe to your own rumination about how disappointment you are. You hurt yourself because you think that it's your fault all along, that unresolved trauma and why why the fuck they'd be so fucking cruel to you, when it was them all along but not you. Ofc people who has the right mind can tell the dissonance right away but for people who dwell in these c-ptsd they sometimes really don't know and can't separate other's feeling from theirs. It's dangerous to be so emphatic, dangerous to yourself not them (thus some people being so closed off and like antisocial when actually perhaps these kind of people actually just feel too much and couldn't take it anymore). It's a possibility you know, have you ever thought about it though?

Never really think I will be as old as the date of my birth. 27. Yeah but it's not 27 yet so there's hope Joe , please come to me and take me away from this nonsensical realm.

I have survived 8th crashes so the 9th ones that must be my final as 🐱 they said only have 9 lives, it's dreadful feeling and my 8th downfall left two scars that is so big on my right foot.

I am actually prepared myself to make video for you, but then I look at my views on telegram you're not there. Well you haven't forever I guess so what's the point? You didn't have time for me. Rin you really left me stranded this time.

I've recorded some jokes so I guess I really don't care as in here I don't even know whether it's reached out to anybody but I after the tense of writing down all of my thoughts, I guess I am calmer like when I finally get orgasm while humping on my bolster. That's bad analogy cause it sounds that I am so porny when I am not, you are. Hahaha

𝐈 𝐧𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫 𝐦𝐞𝐚𝐧𝐭 𝐭𝐨 𝐡𝐮𝐫𝐭 𝐲𝐨𝐮.

yes you fucking do. Stop saying bullshit when you give me butterflies in my chest, not my stomach.

this is what I am jack of all trades but master of none. Slaves too many feelings huh. I mean I actually not like this because I know what I do want to do is just that they don't let me so i have to find another alternative and I really can't see anything, as everything that's enjoyable for me is a wrongdoing then it makes me hate everything so much. That's the gift they always give me every year. Never cease to amaze me. Stop sending me those gifts. I wish someone get me flower for real.

Who do you fucking think you are

-dad

Well I could have been fucking something if you don't treat me with attitude that everything that I like is nothing and only a disgrace nonsensical thing. Now it's too late cause it's too old to begin anything and I am realistic enough to know it's not gonna work. Not even the people that I have known for years could understand and I thought maybe there's something left from the past, nope. They're all gone and I am all alone.

All alone. There's people but it's like no connection. Excommunicated.haha social suicide. But I can't pretend, cause I never back then when I said I believe i really do believe those nonsense. I can't. Not anymore but the consequences it's so painful.

Butterflies on my chest. I should tattooed 7 butterflies on between my melons to remind me the feelings. The butterflies crawling from my heart, wanting to be let out. But I keep falling down because I am too afraid and it was too late anyway. I am always too early or too late. Never come in the right time.

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inconsistantseas · 5 months

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I'm struggling to put into words how I feel right now. Because it shouldn't hurt. I know why it does. This wasn't exactly a surprise, although I have to question why of all times things were finally changed after leaving it for so long. A sudden decision to stip procrastinating? Maybe, most likely. It's not like it was done with the intent to hurt me. That's what you're still trying so clumsily to avoid. It's about sparing my heart as much as it is yours.

And honestly, that's what's been so hard about it, even after all this time. I'd never push for more, as much as you've told me that if not for that fear we could be so much more. As much as it sounds so simple to just give it a try, explain again that if I'm hurting either way, we could at least have some good - even if we don't work out in the end. But that fear runs so deep in you, it's weaved into every part of you. And it can't be properly addressed and aided to heal, this is a cycle that would never end.

It's difficult to watch you burn yourself at both ends for everyone except yourself. And to burn yourself differently for me, the way its more casual and controlled because it has to be. Unlike the others, where that mask is slip on so easy, so casually but taking every effort because if you can be that for them, you can escape yourself and what you might find yourself questioning. There's safety in that role, you've told me as much. And I can cause that mask to slip, things feel different and that's all too much, I know.

There was a moment recently where I thought things might have changed, but even in that moment I knew not to allow myself too much investment in what it all could mean. There was a step forward, almost two. You assured me that you genuinely wanted to try more again, that it wasn't just the people pleasing. I made sure to ask directly, because I know you. I know your always going to do things to make others happy, even if you aren't that invested personally. And you told me it was also what you wanted. Maybe that's true, you do try to be honest with me as much as possible. It's just hard not to question things, hard not to feel like just an option when there's no one new to explore. When there's nothing to show for our time except a few witty one liners.

I know a lot of these thoughts is the trauma talking. The emotional abuse reinforced the already deep rooted fear of not being enough. Of being convenient, but never actually being enough once they have me. There's always someone skinnier, prettier, funnier, better than me. Always better than me. It manifests now as insecurity and jealousy, even paranoia and I still don't have good control over it I know. But things keep happening, things I find out after the fact because to you, there's nothing behind it. You don't give them a second thought but that's part of why it can hurt the way it does. It shouldn't be a big deal but it hits like a truck and all I can do is apologize. Be sorry that you're stuck dealing with some crazy bitch you aren't in any sort of situation with crying because of who you choose to talk to, who you chose to do things with.

I know it's insane. I shouldn't feel this attachment, the feelings shouldn't be this strong. You tell me over and over that you don't deserve the love and care I show, and at times I wish you were right because it would all be so much easier. But something about you has felt different from anyone I've met. My brain feels like you're my person, and no logic helps change it.

It's also why I can't allow myself to go little anymore. It's not safe. She doesn't understand why Daddy suddenly stopped loving her, why he didn't want to be her Daddy anymore. She still cries for him. I don't know what she might say or do if she's out. So I have to keep her back, keep her safe. I never should have let things get to the point they did, after the pain of losing her first Daddy I thought I knew better than to let her get attached again. Though i thought that of myself as well I suppose. But going through this a second time has meant that I'm grieving over that lost connection, that loss feeding into the PTSD fear of abandonment and making a huge spiral of reasons you'll end up stepping further and further back until you decide to leave just like I'm scared you will. And I'm so scared to even say it because it'll just enforce in your mind that you were right all along.

It's not that I wish I could make you want more. I know you care, I know want me as a friend but not more. I know you said never say never, but you're the one that said it first to me, telling me there would be no point in waiting. I keep saying I'll never push you on it, and I stand by that. I just wish you would allow yourself the chance to be more than just surface level happy. That help and healing was more than just something to fake a smile at when offered. I should be wanting to change my feelings, or yours. And I guess in a way that is me wanting to. But I'm finding myself again in the position of wanting the best for someone, for wanting their needs and happiness put first even if it isn't with me. Because in honestly, it seems like it never is. I wish for their best and then wait for the worst. Is it a self-fulfilling prophecy? Maybe. I don't know. I'm just tired. It's tiring when knowing where you stand means you're really not standing anywhere at all. When you find yourself always accidentally been proven right, of being an option wearing a mask labeled priority. I don't need full commitment, I don't need serious labels that feel like binding agreements. I don't even need to feel like I'm worth fighting for, i just want to feel I'm worth trying for. Because i haven't felt like that in a very long time.

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taeyungie · 8 months

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'you need to stay in contact with him no matter what' ah.. i'm not off to a good start. after the call he texted me and showed me a screenshot of my contact photo (he changed it to something stupid i drew long ago) but then i noticed he has my messages on mute, basically so he doesn't get my notifications. if i wasn't hurt enough, that made me reply very dry but he kept going & i just ended up not replying to the last one. i did a few hrs later but not a real response, just a meme cause i saw your msg, better than nothing i guess. i'm having a really hard time to pretend i don't want silence. maybe he'll try to do this until my birthday, and maybe then he wouldn't feel guilty having space from me too. just a guess. or he is trying to not have silence kill things. i didn't understand why he was saying the dumbest things. but he did just kinda break my heart so it was hard to pretend i was fine. i actually cried a lot after that call, which is why texting him was hard.

'you have to understand that he is just trying to be happy too' this hit the most. you're right, he even mentioned how he was still around when i was with my ex, as my friend. and i feel very selfish cause i don't know how i could do the same. i'm not good at hiding my feelings. he also mentioned something very hurtful i did to him because i was in contact with my ex and it just dug the point deeper. i can tell he's tired of waiting.

wow your story. i didn't think of it that way. in a way it's even more heart breaking. cause i'm reading this and it seems to reflect the situation so well. but even if i'm the 1st choice, i might be going too slowly to matter.

he was telling me, "who knows if i'll see someone, i'm busy with school, but i'm just telling you this because if it does happen then you'll know." then i said, well you said you were busy now and it still happened. reassured me he obviously cares for me deeply.. but at that point i kinda zoned out. it started to feel like i was being let down gently. i guess i didn't even deserve that from everything i did and said before :(

i'm trying really hard not to close my heart. it makes talking to him hard. idk how i should talk to him now. i don't think we'll be talking everyday anymore. but after that call, i really am going to try and do better for myself so i can feel comfortable to see him. i just don't know if it'll be in time but i'll try. & thanks so much for your thoughts/advice it meant the world 💜

i understand it's hard for you to talk, take your time okay? don't force yourself if you can't bring yourself to even pretend, it's not good for you. he probably really doesnt want to keep up a bad atmosphere around you, hence he's trying to loosen up things with talking about anything, and i think it's okay as long as he treats your discussion seriously while it's happening. about the muted messages - it's something that i even do myself, but listen to me please. maybe it's petty as hell but personally i get extremely overwhelmed and i overthink everything, i hate confrontation 🤷 I know it sucks but that's just who i am and I am /scared/ I avoid negativity even when it comes from people I love, so if i didn't mute messages from a person with whom i argued i would honestly go insane, because waiting for notifications from them would be the only thing i think about until we are not on good terms again (which can take a very long time sometimes) and i would have a breakdown with every single ping that my phone would make, thinking it's them and that i have to come back to confronting painful reality, when i wish the negative and serious conversations never happened to me. that's just how i am, maybe he is like this too. i don't see any other point in him muting you.

so as you noticed yourself he is aware of his position and of what you were exposing him to, his behavior makes sense, right? i know you are pushed against the wall right now, sweetheart... but i think it's time for you to choose what is most important for you at the moment, some things can't wait.

it's easier to have people around in real life than to keep up a relationship long distance or online, remember about that love. it's easier to create bonds when you see somebody every day, that's why he wanted you to know that it is the possibility if he meets someone, it doesn't mean he WILL purposefully look for it to move on from you, that's not it at all. i think you just have to give yourself some time to rest and then make a decision, honey. when you cool down think about everything again and be brave okay? he did NOT reject you, he just needs a strong sense of security and to be sure. give it all a few days, and don't give up okay? we have to fight for the ones we love.

#i'm glad i could be here for you 💖#also.. if something between you two changes maybe in a week a month or even later... please come and tell me about it?#i want to be here for you whenever and whatever happens okay #anonymous #answered

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free--therapy · 11 months

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hii it's anon!

the post you shared about "moral perfectionism" was so relatable. i was never like that and used to be okay with things i did or mistakes I made even if they were "morally wrong"

but then, anxiety hit and two years ago, i read some things which made me think "wow some people on the internet are so nice" which in turn, started making me think how not nice or bad of a person I was.

which was why I started worrying about any mistake I'd made especially those which resulted in other people getting affected just because i wanted something. even things that weren't necessarily mistakes, i would overthink and they would start seeming that way.

but eventually, i started telling myself even if these mistakes seemed like only i did things like that, the fact is I was still a child or a teen. around that age, everyone does things like that. even adults do things like that. i realised that if it's something recent or something I can fix, maybe then I can try.

But for older mistakes that have gone by, if everyone else has probably forgotten about it or if they wouldn't even care about it now or maybe they didn't know I did something but now after so long, wouldn't care anyway. Then, i don't need to think about those either. I can let it go or forget about it or stop thinking about it. Freeing myself from the guilt and moving on wouldn't make me a bad person, it would make me a human like anyone else.

Also, recently I've been sending you wayy too many questions I'm really sorry about it. If I'm bothering you, please let me know.

It's just that a part of me just can't come to terms with the fact that roughly just a week ago or so, i was doing completely fine without any problems or overthinking. But now, just a week later, I've been spending most of my time inside my head. Of course, I've been rationalising too but that takes up a good amount of time too. And at the end of the day, i realise that i didn't do much today except spending time thinking or rationalising....just in my head.

It's a bit disheartening especially when i think i was okay with everything just a while ago and doing so good but suddenly it's like this. And it's even more disheartening when i think how everyone around me doesn't have to deal with this. They all seem to properly be in the present and even their worries seem to be about their present issues whereas there's me worrying about something that doesn't even matter. Sometimes i just wanna cry about this you know? It's okay most times but suddenly some days it seems so not fair.

On top of that, i haven't been able to share any of this with my sister either. I used to at least share what i could back then, but this time, i have not because she has her own big issues to deal with. So it feels very lonely and frankly, i hate feeling this way. I hope for things to get better soon for me and that I'll be able to leave this behind and move on.

I'm sorry for saying random things and for depending on you so much recently. I'm always grateful for all your help 💗

You're welcome, Anon. I'm glad you found that post helpful!

Hey, it's okay. I understand what it's like to have all these worrying thoughts and needing someone to just make you feel like you're not insane, but also needing the help to make sure they don't consume you.

You need to be more patient and kind to yourself. Don't beat yourself up because it feels like you might be going backwards. You're in a much better spot than you were a few months ago and you should be proud of yourself and how far you've come. Don't let a bad week or a bad day discourage you from continuing on in your journey. You're not perfect and that's okay because no one is!

#ask #answered #anon #anxiety #perfectionism #healing #anxious thoughts

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domthedevil · 3 years

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okay so yk how a lot of people theorize that the brothers feel when others are feeling their sin? here's what i thought asmo feels when (afab)mc is horny and when they can't finish because they don't know how to so asmo kinda soft doms them and teaches them by touching them in all the right places until finally they cum properly. i'll just go back to horny jail-

This makes me want to do JOIs for the brothers. Talk each of them through an orgasm with some good ol dirty talk. 🤤

I also love this because sometimes we don’t know our bodies. And a patient and loving sexual partner can help you discover those things. Asmo is the perfect example of of an experienced but patient and understanding lover. (Best Boy Asmo is Best Boy)

Let ME Help You, MC

Warnings: Asmo x MC, masturbation, female anatomy, squirting

Asmo could feel it. Even during the dead of night. Someone was indulging in his sin. Something he could never ignore. And seeing how half of the pacts he had with humans was just down the hall, he let his curiosity get the best of him.

Sneaking down the hall, he followed the sweet aroma emitting from your room. You poor thing. Still suffering these moments alone. Asmo wished he could just come in, and show you how good his touch would be. But for now he pressed his ear to the door. Hoping your sweet voice would be loud enough for him to hear.

And thank Diavolo it was.

Your fingers were slowly circling your clit. Letting small waves of pleasure wash over you. Building that pleasant heat you loved. Thoughts of being eaten out, of being fingered, and pounded into made everything build quickly. The breathy moans you let slip made you embarrassed. Even alone it felt a little shameful masturbating like this. But you wanted to orgasm so badly. It’d been too long.

And having to see him everyday made it worse. You wanted so badly to kiss, to touch, to love and it drove you insane with desire. The sexual frustration was unbearable. But you couldn’t get yourself to come alone...

Hearing your lovely moans end, Asmo came back down from his own arousal. He was sure you hadn’t finished. The lust he felt from your room still hung heavy in the air. Maybe you needed a little help...

“MC? Are you awake?” Asmo’s coy voice made it through your heavy door.

Flustered from not being able to come and now having a sudden visitor, you looked for the underwear you carelessly through to the side.

“U-Uum! H-hold on.”

But he went ahead and walked in, already knowing you were going to hide. Your discomposed state made him stop in his tracks. He’d never seen you so erotic and honestly tasty. Desperately trying to cover yourself, you threw your blanket over your legs.

“I though you could use some help. Think you’d like that?” Asmo placed a knee next to you on the mattress. Of course he was going to wait for a full invitation before getting in bed with you.

“I-I don’t know what you mean...” he probably knew everything but you still tried to hide it.

“Well let me show you.”

Slipping behind you beneath the blankets, Asmo held your bare waist as he leaned you against his chest. A soft kiss grazing your ear made he warm all over. Maybe because you were already riled up, or maybe the master of lust had a magic touch after all.

Slowly Asmo’s hands slipped up your shirt, almost too lightly, he teased your erect nipples.

“You have to start slower...” his whisper was hot in your ear. “Make sure you explore your whole body.”

Your quiet moans made his heart pound. You were soft in all the right places. Your body deserves to be explored. To be treasured. To be pleased.

Asmo’s hands were soft, even when he began to pinch and pull at your peaks, you noticed how it rubbed your skin. Soon though, his hands left you to guide your own. Your surprised expression made Asmo giggle. Using your own fingers, he made you trace your already sensitive clit again.

“Do you feel a difference, love? See how much better that feels?”

“Y-yes. A-Asmo...” Your shaking voice was too cute to him.

Taking your other hand, he pressed two of your fingers inside you. It’s was a familiar touch, helping you relax slightly. But having him guide your hands made it so much more exciting.

“I’m getting...hotter.” With Asmo’s guidance you felt the tip of your fingers hit a sensitive spot inside you. “A-ah! That’s-!”

“Oh? Did you feel something really good?” His coy voice huffed in your ear.

“A spot I can’t...can’t reach...” between sweet moans and ragged breaths you began bucking your hips against your fingers.

“Now, now MC. Don’t rob me of the chance to help you. Let me use my fingers.”

Trading your fingers for his, you could feel the difference immediately. Those same soft fingers naturally found the very spot you had just found. Holding your hips down with his free hand, his other had began moving in and out of you roughly. Rougher than you could do alone. And each thrusting of his fingers made you hotter and hotter inside.

“A-Asmo. I feel like I’m close.”

“Already? You must really want it. You’ve been wanting to come for a long time now, havent you?”

You nodded, eyes closed and lips slightly parted. He whispered little teases and praises as your hips jerked again. It only took a few more moments before you felt it run through you. An electric like feeling through you whole body made your walls clench tightly around his fingers. But it went even further. Lasting longer than you’d remembered, the orgasm made your legs shake, and you felt yourself squirt onto your sheets.

Your breathing was heavy and ragged as he pulled his fingers from within you. You watched him slowly move his fingers to his lips, licking and savoring the taste of your powerful orgasm.

“Mmmmm. I think we both got what we needed dear...”

#ns//fw #obey me fanfic #obey me smut #om! fanfic #om! smut #obey me asmodeus #obey me Asmo #om! asmodeus #obey me #om!#afab!reader

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asterekmess · 3 years

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Been seeing you getting hate mail and while I absolutely can't understand why anyone would go to all the trouble to make some one else feel bad... I also kinda really love the discourse on Scott? Like YOUR RANTS oh man. On point. Always. Tbh I tried giving Scott a chance... He is the main char after all... But I was like??? Wtf? That dude does nothing but refute others and does whatever he wants. And this was when I didn't particularly like Stiles either (first time watching Teen Wolf). But then I got to know more of him and like Tony he went asshole to lovable asshole—seriously, Stiles might not be the ‘nicest’ but he tries and his heart is in good place—while Scott is just... self-righteous. Someone pointed out that he sees people as possessions and that irks me too that I can actually see it being true. The dude has literally nothing going on except for being the one that gets bitten. And the Romeo-and-Juliet-esque romance he has.

Okay, okay, where was I going with this?? Right. LOVE YOUR RANTS. People need to understand that Scott not being liked isn't because of his race or anything trivial like it—he just happens to be—but because of his actions. Or inactions, as it were. *remembers the pool scene and Scott saying he's busy and resists the urge to chuck a shoe at him*

Basically, love you, love your work, and love your words! ❤️

I've talked with some friends about it, and our number one issue sort of...boiled down to the hypocrisy of the show? I....sort of rant a lot here, and I would add a Read More, but I can't find the option anymore?? I fucking hate Tumblr. EDIT: I found a post that told me how to do it!

So, since he's the character I focus on the most, let's talk about Stiles' morality. Because, you're right. Stiles is an asshole. He does some fucking awful shit in the first season, and even if he had a Reason to do it, it was still bad. And I still don't like it. But I understand it.

Stiles' lack of shits about what is 'lawful' is literally established in the first ten seconds of the show. He's a sheriff's son who sneaks onto people's roofs in the middle of the night bc they aren't answering his calls, who listens in on his dad's work conversations and is willing to fuck up a crime scene because he's so excited about getting to see a dead body. He doesn't care about laws. He doesn't even care about most basic manners (invasion of privacy much, with having Scott sniff Lydia to see if she liked him?). He's a dickhead, even to the people he cares about sometimes. But personality and morality aren't the same. Stiles' entire actual morality system is based around whatever he needs to do to keep the people he loves safe and happy. Lying to his dad so he doesn't get murdered by hunters? Totally fine. Telling Scott that it was "Jackson's own fault" that Scott attacked him with superstrength and dislocated his shoulder, so Scott doesn't feel like an asshole? That's just best friend duties! He will lie, steal, cheat, and he will kill to keep his loved ones safe (let's not forget this boy threw molotovs at Peter, knowing damn well what they would do to him). We can headcanon all we want about all the different people who are in this group of loved ones, but the list is canonically very short: Scott, his dad, and Lydia. Later on, like, past s3B? It includes Derek. Canonically. Stiles puts his life and the lives of others he cares about on the line while he lies to the matriarch of the Calavera hunter clan, to save Derek Hale. Derek is just canonically a part of that group now, and he fucking knows it bc Stiles is his anchor (that's canon too bb). End of Story, Sterek or no Sterek. It's why we get that insane number of lookbacks when Derek is dying before his evolution. Because Stiles is being forced to choose between two people who are BOTH in his ride-or-die group. He Cannot Pick between Scott and Derek, until Derek begs him to leave.

SO, yes, Stiles does fuckface things, and I don't always agree with what he does, but it is ACCURATE TO HIS CHARACTER. He is morally grey. He NEVER CLAIMS to be pure or good or just or righteous. Stiles knows who he is, and he stays true to himself. And I love him for that.

The same goes for a bunch of other characters! For Peter, who is strikingly similar to Stiles, in that family goes above literally everything. Screw the idea that he was following Derek around waiting for the chance to steal back the Alpha spark. That man put his life on the line (his second life, no less) to get the shit beaten out of him until Derek let him help save Derek's life Again and Again. Family Comes First.

Scott's morality is...confusing as fuck. I thought at first he was similar to Stiles, in that family came first, but...while he's protective of his mother, he also does a lot of stuff that puts her at risk without seeming to care/worry (like leaving Peter alone with her once Stiles hits their car, so he can chase Jackson) (or asking her to come to the high school when he's convinced there's a bomber in it)? Seriously, he's more protective over Allison, than his mother. It's very black and white the rest of the time. Very "this bad" "this good." And if you do "bad" then you are bad forever, while if you do "good" you are only good until you do "bad." The Betas were "good" until they asked for the bite, and then they were "Bad." Derek was "bad" when Scott met him and scared him, so after that, no matter how much "good" he did, he remained "bad." But only when it suits him. Allison is good even when she does bad, because he wants her to be good. Chris is good even though he's done mountains of bad, because of the minuscule amount of good that Scott has seen him do, because Scott wants him to be good. Even DEUCALION is good, despite the crazy CRAZY amount of bad he's done and despite having seen him do NO GOOD, just because Scott wants him to be good. Lying to those closest to you is bad, unless Scott is doing it, and then it's good, because he knows HE is good. Killing people is bad, unless Scott is doing it. Letting villains go is bad, unless Scott is doing it. Biting people is bad, unless Scott is doing it. Protecting family is good even if it requires killing or lying, unless it's not Scott doing it. Revenge for past slights is good, unless it's not SCOTT doing it. And you try to understand it! You try to say, okay, then he's morally grey, got it. He plays with the rules to suit his own morality, whatever. Except that Scott, the other characters, and THE SHOW ITSELF, are all telling you otherwise! They all say that Scott is morally pure. That he is good and righteous and lawful. That he always does the "right" thing, and that when he does "bad" things, it's justified and he had to. THE HEAVENS THEMSELVES say Scott is somehow better or more righteous than the other characters by MAKING HIM AN ALPHA OUT OF NOWHERE. (I'm talking abt canon here, not going into deaton conspiracy theories) It's like....Like in the hate mail response I did, where I pointed out that Every Single Thing people get angry at Derek for doing, Scott did too. Lying, killing (or at least attempting it), attacking innocents, losing his temper, keeping secrets, refusing to work with someone who could help, etc etc etc. Everything Derek has done that is morally "wrong," Scott has also done. And that's okay! Doing a bad thing doesn't make you a bad person, and even if it did, Scott is ALLOWED to be bad! GO FOR IT.

Except that he is sinless. It isn't that he learns from the bad things he does, it's that they aren't treated like bad things in the first place. Because Scott did it, and Scott always does the right thing.

Derek's behavior is reprehensible at times, but the show ADMITS that and frames it as bad. Frames it as him doing a bad thing when he scares Isaac or throws Peter or tells Erica who to date. And that's fine, because Derek is established as not being morally pure.

But SCOTT IS. And because they were so desperate to make him continue being "Pure" they didn't frame the things he did as wrong, or if they did, they absolved him of it immediately, using the exact same reasoning that works for Derek's situations, but this time Actually Accepting it.

He scares Stiles, well it's because he's scared. He throws Isaac, it's because he's upset. He attacks Jackson well it's because Jackson was being a dick. He orders Allison to date Matt, well he had a goal to accomplish. Every reason is treated like a fucking doctor's note that erases the bad things he does.

Being scared, or angry, or retaliating to someone being an asshole, or trying to protect himself, was NEVER a good enough reason for Derek to do ANYTHING "Bad." It was never an acceptable excuse.

IF IT WERE: If the show were making a statement about how fallable people are, how they do bad things, but they do them for a REASON. How people will do wild and terrible things out of fear, and how that doesn't make it less bad, but it makes it understandable, so don't demonize them out of nowhere. If that were the case, I would HAVE BEEN FINE WITH IT.

Scott is held to COMPLETELY different standards than everyone else in the show! And I DON'T mean that people held him to higher ones. They dropped that bar so fucking low. Anything was allowed, and any excuse was good enough.

He made out with a girl who was dating someone else, who his best friend was in love with? It's just the full moon, he's angsty about losing Allison. He ducttapes Liam to a bathtub and starts throwing random phrases at him that he hated Derek for saying to him? He's freaked out! He doesn't know what to do with a bitten wolf! It was an accident! He works with a mass murderer behind people's backs without telling them the whole story? Am I talking about Gerard or Deucalion? Who fucking knows. Either way, it's okay, because he was protecting his family. He plots to murder a cancer patient slowly and painfully by replacing meds that likely included painkillers with mountain ash, and the uses someone else's body to deliver the killing blow, and it's okay because he was just being smart! He was just working ten steps ahead! He was saving his mom and the whole town! Who cares if it DIDN"T WORK?

He walks into his ex-girlfriend's hotel room and scares the SHIT out of her while she's naked and alone in the shower? It was the wolfsbane. It doesn't matter that no one else's impulses included HARASSING someone. He lies to his girlfriend's face about her own life because he doesn't think it's important enough for her to know (who am I talking about, come on, take a guess, which one is it? Allison or Kira? Trick question: it's both). He was just being kind! He didn't want to worry her! He didn't want to make her feel bad! She didn't need to know!

I'm so far off track it's not even funny. My point was that Everything the other characters in the show are demonized for or framed as evil or bad or wrong for doing, Scott is shown to do and it's treated like at minimum a comedy, if not a Perfect Brilliant Strategic Move.

God, fucking hell. I mean, the PARALLELS you see in this show, between Scott and others. The scene of Alexander Argent going to the hotel after being bit? That bit where he pulls his shirt up in the mirror? It's a near PERFECT replica of Scott looking at his bite at Deaton's. They paralleled SCOTT MCCALL with AN ARGENT. Deaton has this whole line in S2 where he's bitching at Derek about "the person you should trust the most doesn't trust you at all" And then seasons later, we have Scott look his best friend in the eye and refuse to trust him, only to get upset later because Stiles doesn't want to work with him anymore and he "lost them." Scott goes running into Derek's house in S1 to accuse him of killing the bus driver, and when he can't get a real response, he EGGS HIM ON by accusing him of Murdering his SISTER, just to get Derek to react. Which is the EXACT same thing Kate did when she showed up and wanted Derek to lose his temper. Scott is CONSTANTLY paralleled with villains and assholes, and constantly does the things that others are persecuted for. But instead of feeling regret or learning something from it, instead of growing AT ALL. Those actions are treated as good. We are told they are righteous. And clever. That they are what heroes do. AND YES: There are parallels between Derek and Stiles' behaviors and villains/morally grey characters! Of course there are!

BUT THEY AREN'T SUPPOSED TO BE THE TRUE ALPHA MAIN CHARACTER. SCOTT IS SUPPOSED TO BE THE GOOD GUY. HE'S NOT SUPPOSED TO MIMIC/EMULATE THE VILLAINS, AND HE'S NOT SUPPOSED TO BE REWARDED WHEN HE DOES IT ANYWAY.

I've said it before, and I'll say it again; I understand the urge to think that the Teen Wolf writers did all of this on purpose. That they built Scott up as an unreliable narrator, so that we're forced to come to terms with a protagonist who isn't good, and we watch them fall into a villainous role while thinking all the while they are a hero. That all these parallels are intentional and the writers just couldn't Tell us what was going on bc they didn't have enough power.

And sometimes I play into it. I will lie to myself about Scott being the 'narrator' of the entire show, and that we're seeing it all through his eyes so of course things are biased and conflicting, just so I can actually Enjoy watching it.

But I think it's absolute bullshit that this was done on purpose. It wasn't. The parallels appeared because they Wanted Scott to do the badass things that they had all the villains doing, throwing people and being sneaky and clever, and stopping the bad guy, and they didn't want to deal with the fact that they were having him do bad things. So they just pretended he wasn't and refused to acknowledge that they'd already punished other people for doing the same exact shit, but somehow Scott was getting rewarded. They wanted Scott to be the hero, so they made him the hero, and screw everybody else.

#personal #anti-Scott McCall #go for it #love mail #meta ramblings #rant #long post #WHERE IS THE READ MORE BUTTON HALP

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tastyykpop · 4 years

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[ᴡᴇʟʟ ᴍᴀʏʙᴇ ɪғ ʏᴏᴜ ᴅɪᴅɴᴛ ᴋɪʟʟ ʜɪᴍ]

Pairings: mafia boss!jaehyun x reader

♡𝑠𝑚𝑢𝑡♡

Warnings: dom!jaehyun, brat!reader, yandere themes, orgasm denial, slight edging (like really slight), thigh slapping, ropes, vibrator, punishment kinda, creampie, unprotected sex (stay safe 🙏)

The glass in Jaehyuns hand shattered as he saw another man approach you. He was beyond pissed. Mostly at you honestly. You were basically letting it happen because to you, this was all fun and games.

It shouldn't be though.

Jaehyun was a dangerous man. Someone you really shouldn't be around and someone who had a lot of power, over anything and everyone. Most people were terrified of him and only idiots would dare to speak out of line. And if they were lucky, maybe, just maybe they'd make it out alive.

It all happened when you came to this bar for a good drink and a slight buzz. But here, there was always someone hitting on you. This someone happened to be Jaehyun. It was the first time you met him too. Unfortunately, like the idiot you were (and still are), you talked back to him. It wasnt because you were trying to be rude, but instead you were fed up with the way he was acting towards you. The small brushes on the shoulder and the hand on your knee was getting on your nerves. But what really annoyed you were his comments. Not realising who he was and the power he had, you got angry and gave him back handed comments.

You only stopped when you felt a sting to your thigh.

Luckily for you it was only a slap. Not a knife or a bullet. Jaehyun was never this gentle.

Everytime after that, you would still come back to the bar, in your usual seating and Jaehyun would always be there. He even remembered your favorite drink after the first few nights. How sweet. But now, he was seated away from you with a group of men, watching your every move since he couldnt be with you at the moment.

"Baby that dress looks so pretty on you." The guy sitting next to you commented. His tongue swiping over his lips to coat them in his own saliva.

"Hmm thanks." You smiled, knowing that an angry Jaehyun was watching you like a hawk from across the bar.

The man's hand began to slither up your thigh, dragging his hand up and down. It was nothing like Jaehyuns rough, yet loving hands.

"I want to get to know you more." You turned your head to face the man and raised an eyebrow. "Come home with me."

"Sorry, but I'm gonna have to say no." You took a quick swig of your drink and smiled.

"Come on baby. It'll be worth your time." The man took your hands into his and brought them to his lips.

Jaehyun was going to kill someone today.

"Im sorry," you pulled your hand away, giggling, "but I said no." The man was still relentless, grabbing your hand and placing it on his bulge. Your eyes lit up and you searched around the room to see if anyone was seeing what was going on, stopping on your boyfriend's cold eyes.

Jaehyun got up from his seat, walking towards you. Your hand pulled away like lightning. A groan coming from the man next to you. Panic filled your body as you knew someone was going to get killed, or injured.

An angry Jaehyun is not a good Jaehyun. Especially if someone touched his girlfriend. And he let that go too far.

"Whats my pretty girl doing?" Jaehyun pulled your hair to the side and lightly kissed your neck. It was odd hearing such a soft voice come out of Jaehyun, yet you could feel how pissed he was.

"I-i was just talking..." His hands grabbed your waist, digging his nails deep into your side. Jaehyun wasnt an idiot, but you tried.

"And who the fuck are you?" The man asked. You actually forgot he was still there. But he wasn't going to be for long, Jaehyun ripped out a gun and pointed it at the man before making sure the safety was off.

"The real question is who are you?"

"I-i..." the man stuttered, obviously threatened by the weapon in your boyfriends hand.

"I dont like waiting." Jaehyun cocked the gun.

"I-im no one s-sir my apologies." The man walked away as quickly as he could from the both of you. Jaehyun snickering at how pathetic he was.

"Im gonna killed him for touching you."

"No, you wont. You can't always hurt someone who talks or touches me."

"Dont talk back to me, im not in the mood." You got up from the bar stool and walked with Jaehyun to his car. A very expensive one at that.

"I dont care if your in the mood stop acting like a bitch." Your sparky comment took all of Jaehyuns power to not bend you over and spank you in public.

"Get in the car Y/N."

"No." Crossing your arms over your chest, you turned and walked away. That set Jaehyun off.

You were suddenly in the backseat of his car, your face pushed against the seat and your ass in the air. The dress you were wearing was barely covering anything anymore.

"Listen here you pathetic little slut," he whisped in your ear, "if i tell you to get in the fucking car you listen, understand?"

You tried to get out of the grip he had on you, but it was no use. It just earned you a smack.

"Stop moving and answer me."

"Yes." A sigh left your mouth as he let go of you and walked to the drivers seat, starting the car. Leaving you in the back flustered.

"Come on pretty girl you can take it." Jaehyun was currently fucking you with a vibrator. The vibrations sending you over the edge as he kept moving it in and out at a slow pace. You grabbed his arm and dug your nails deep into him, hoping that he'd stop punishing you and fuck you for real.

"P-please.." You begged as you squirmed on the bed from all the edging he was doing.

Jaehyun ignored you and picked up his pace. The room was filled with a mix or screaming, moaning, and wet sounds, just how he likes it.

He pulled you in for a rough kiss, teeth clashing with each other. The rougher he was, the more passionate he was with you.

"Im gonna cum." You moaned out, pulling away from the deep kiss, having enough of all the toying from the man above you.

"No youre not." He ripped the toy out of you, ruining your orgasm.

"Aw look at that baby, guess you won't cum again for another month."

You glared at the man as he sat there with a playful smirk before he moved on top of you, leaning down to bite and suck on your neck, leaving purple and blue marks on your skin as a whine left your lips. You wanted more, but knowing Jaehyun you probably weren't going to get it until he was satisfied enough. But you knew he was going to give up sooner or later. The boner brushing against your thigh was not going to go unnoticed by you.

"Stop...teasing..." You tried saying as Jaehyun moved back up to kiss you again.

"Why should i?" He looked up with an eyebrow raised, "You werent exactly the nicest to me. So why should I be nice to you?"

You frowned at the older man ready to talk back again, but the sudden cold hand cupping your hot entrance stopped you. The lower half of your body was almost grinding on his hand for more friction. Jaehyun noticed and smirked at your attempts to get off.

Smack.

"Dont even try that." He kept the same agonizing smirk on his face, giving him a more sadistic look than before. Your movement stopped with a pout and you watched Jaehyun take his hand away from your core.

"Then ill just do it myself." You pretty much just pushed Jaehyun away from you and attempted to please yourself, but you knew damn well it wasn't nearly as good as Jaehyun himself.

"Look at the pretty girl trying to act all tough." Jaehyun cooed at you, taking your hand away from your core and pinning your hands above your head. "Have i not been punishing you good enough? Is that why your acting even more bratty than usual?"

"No," you shook your head at your boyfriend, "its the fact you going to kill someone just because they touched me."

"Well i have a newsflash for you princess," Jaehyun leaned closer to your ear and whispered, "theyre already dead."

"Y-youre insane Jaehyun..."

"But thats why you love me." You watched as Jaehyun got off of you, moving to find something in the very large closet you both shared. When he turned back, you expected another toy he was going to tease you with, but no. He had ropes in his hand as he walked towards you with the same sadistic smirk that you hated yet loved.

He tied you up effortlessly, only giving him a few hard times but that only ended with a few smacks to your thigh.

Jaehyun stood back looking at your naked figure, a small blush painted your cheeks as you felt small under his gaze. Yes, Jaehyun was rather proud of what he was looking at. The beautiful hickeys and bite marks that littered your thighs, neck, and chest. The red hand prints on your thighs wrapping around to your ass. And the crescent shapes in your hips from his nails digging into your skin. He loved all of it.

You could hear the sound of clothes dropping to the floor, but didnt bother turning your head, too embarrassed to look at him now that you felt more exposed with the ropes holding your wrists to the bed post.

"Spread your legs for me princess." The sound of Jaehyuns voice brought you back to reality. You looked at him, his eyes staring into yours waiting for you to do as you were told. But did you didnt move. Just adding more fuel to his anger. "I said spread your fucking legs." He growled. You did so a bit too slowly for his liking and it only ended up with him forcefully spreading them himself.

A quiet gasp left your lips watching as he began to slowly grind into you, making you feel his bare cock against your pussy. Your sighs and moans filled the room, jaehyun watched closely, taking in every whine and movement you made. He pulled back and you waited for him to continue grinding but no, he was inside you without warning, not giving you anytime to adjust.

Jaehyuns fast pace shook the bed and your wrists were chaffing against the ropes. Moans erupted from your throat from the pain and pleasure Jaehyun was giving you.

"Fuck, Jaehyun...."

Jaehyun moved his hand from your hips up to your throat giving it a tight squeeze, "Such a dirty mouth." His hips snapped forward making your eyes roll to the back of your head and more cuss words were choked out. Earning a disappointed head shake from your boyfriend.

The lewd sounds of your bodies filled the room as he continued fucking you into oblivion. If someone walked in, they would be sure to have the image of you being fucked by Jaehyun with his fingers in your mouth and hand wrapped around your throat all while being tied up, stuck in their head for a few months.

"You love being a brat huh?" Jaehyun started whilst making eye contact, "Cause you know you'll be fucked like the pathetic slut you are. Am i right princess?"

He took his fingers out of your mouth to let you speak, "Y-yes." You moaned out. A quiet chuckle rang through your ears.

"Needy little brat..." His pace was faster yet sloppy and you knew he was close. The bed rocked and the sound of skin against skin filled your ears. Jaehyuns grip on your throat not planning on letting go as you struggled for breath.

"Jaehyun....p-please I'm gonna-"

"If you even dare cum ill beat your ass." That changed your thoughts about even bothering to let go, knowing he wasn't playing around.

Just as you felt like holding it in wasnt enough, Jaehyun was already one step ahead and came inside you, riding out his orgasm with a low groan.

Jaehyun pulled out, removing the ropes from your wrists. They were as red as your thighs and they stung too the touch. Jaehyun, being the nice man he is, even though he was still slighlty mad, took the time to give you after care, applying a cream to your wrists and butt just so the redness would calm down and cleaned up the cum dripping down your thighs.

After all that he laid beside you, embracing you in his arms and kissing the top of your head. "My pretty girl." He muttered against your hair before the both of you drifted off to sleep. Although you were still angry that you couldnt cum.

#nct smut #nct #jung jaehyun #jung jaehyun smut #jaehyun #jaehyun nct #jung jaehyun nct #nct 127 #jaehyun smut #nct dream #wayv #nct u #kpop smut #kpop fluff #kpop angst #nct fluff #nct angst

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tearh0seok · 3 years

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For all you c!Wilbur and c!Quackity enthusiasts/ people who just like some good old fashioned c!karlnapity angst, this ones for you. Enjoy!!

—————

My Tears Ricochet

And I still talk to you

(when I'm screaming at the sky)

And when you can't sleep at night

(you hear my stolen lullabies)

<><><><><><><><><><><><><>

The bag hits his back with a solid thump, causing him to stumble forward and grunt from the weight of it. He instinctively reaches out for the nearest wall and steadies himself. He holds his breath for a second, prepared to hear the rustling of bed sheets as someone wakes up due to the noise, before he releases it in a quiet, cynical laugh. He is, as he had been for a while now, alone. No one around for him to hold, to talk to, to wake up, to care about. As he makes his way out into the streets of Las Nevada’s, he scans the area for any sign of life. Slime and Fundy must have turned in early enough, and Foolish had long stopped working on his latest big project. He strolls through the streets quietly, humming to himself as he takes in the nation, his nation. At night, the buildings and area look like a mirror image of the man who owned them: empty, cold and alone. He shakes his head trying not to think about it too much. Now was not a time for self-pity or grief. No, now was the time for revenge. The kind of revenge that he just couldn’t drag the others into, they’d never understand. In fact, they’d all think he was insane. They’d leave him behind, all alone, just like before, with-

“Quackity?”

The voice causes Quackity to drop his bag, the thud echoing against the pristine buildings of his city. He looks up at the road ahead of him, and finds Wilbur Soot leaning against the Las Nevada’s sign, a shadow under the bright lights, with his face illuminated only by the red hot glow of his cigarette. Quackity sees his lips twitch up into a tired smirk, and it immediately makes him want to punch the other man in the face. “You’re on my land, Wilbur,” he growls, picking the bag back up, and throwing it back over his shoulder. His grip on the straps tighten as he hears Wilbur laugh quietly. “I thought we put that in the past, Big Q. You know, healthy competition and all that jazz?” Wilbur says tauntingly. Quackity barely spares him a glance as he trudges past the sign, staring straight over Wilbur’s shoulder to where he can see the glow of the burger van in the distance.

“Yeah well, we’re both closed for the day so I didn’t see a need for any of the formalities,” Quackity mutters, praying that the conversation ends there. But of course, to no avail, as soon Quackity hears footsteps behind him and has to resist the oh so demanding urge to punch this guy in the nose. “Then, off the record and completely out of curiosity, as an old friend, may I ask where we’re going?” Wilbur says, as he falls into step beside the smaller man. Quackity digs his heels into the tarmac and stops, turning to the man beside him. “ We are not going anywhere, I have some business to attend to, and you are going back to wherever you came from and forgetting you saw me,” he grunts, poking Wilbur in the middle of his chest to emphasize his point.

He continues walking, and due to the lack of footsteps he assumes the other man has taken the hint and is heading home. However, he hears the sound of shoes approaching, and suddenly Wilbur is at his side once more. “Oh but now you see, my friend,” Wilbur sighs, voice laced with amusement, “now I’m intrigued. What is this so-called business, why is it so secret, and why-“ Quackity feels a slight pull on his back as Wilbur tries to peek into the bag. He quickly whips around, face to face with Wilbur, hoping the other hadn’t seen the contents of the bag. Unfortunately, the fire dancing in Wilbur’s eyes and the wild grin that covers his face suggests otherwise.

“- Why do you have so much TNT and a flint and steel, Quackity?”

It’s said quietly, but the tone of his voice is so menacing that it causes Quackity to shudder. This is really not how tonight was supposed to go, and the more time Quackity spends here talking to Wilbur, the more time he has to contemplate and regret the decision he’s about to make. So he lets his guard down, briefly, and murmurs, “It’s personal, Will, and I’m already starting to regret it, so the last thing I need is to feel guilty about dragging someone else into this too.” And with that, he slowly turns away, head hanging, and begins mentally bracing for what he’s about to do. He just needs to clear his head, and remind himself that this isn’t his fault, it’s everyone else’s for pushing him away, pushing him to this point, and for leaving him alone, AGAIN-

“Do you need some company?”

The voice is quiet and wavering, and if they hadn’t known each other for so long, Quackity wouldn’t have recognized the unsure tone of Wilbur’s voice. He looks over his shoulder at the other man, whose face, illuminated by the moon, is covered with hesitation.

“Wilbur, I just told you, I don’t want to drag anyone else-“

“I didn’t ask if you wanted company, I asked if you needed it, Quackity.”

The words stop him in his tracks. He feels all the air rush out of his lungs and finds himself struggling to breathe. He looks down at the freshly paved road below him, willing away the hot sting of tears. No one, not even Slime, has asked him that in a very long time. The last person to ever say that to him was probably-

“Listen, I know what it’s like, carrying all of this awful stuff on your shoulders. And I have no doubt that what you’re about to do is going to be something you add to the list of things you regret, but you had to do in the moment. I’m not offering to help, as I can tell this is something you need to do for yourself.” He feels a hand on his shoulder, and looks up to see Wilbur with a grim, but soft smile. “What I’m offering is my presence, just so you don’t have to go through it alone.”

Quackity pauses for a moment, taking in the weight of Wilbur’s words, but soon realizes that if he thinks about them too much, he might break down in tears. So he takes the bag off his back and dumps it into Wilbur’s arms. The other catches it with a quiet “oof”, as Quackity grunts, “Let’s go then, we need to get this done by sunrise.”

And just like that, they head off into the night.

~~~~~~~

Wilbur soon realizes that, in hindsight, he should have known where Quackity was headed all along. Quackity didn’t have any major enemies that Wilbur knew of besides Dream and Techno, but Dream is in prison and Techno is god knows where. Quackity also doesn’t seem like the type to commit an act of violence without some sort of motivation, and Wilbur’s 90% sure he wouldn’t do it to threaten someone. Really, using that reasoning, Wilbur should have known their destination. Even as they trekked across the hills and plains, Wilbur should have noticed the direction they were going in. However, it wasn’t until they came to a clearing that opened up onto a shoreline, that he saw their target. While he knows there’s no other option it could be, he still asks the question.

“Why are we at Kinoko Kingdom?”

There it stood, across the water in all its shining glory. Though it was silent in the dead of night, the nation still looked warm and inviting, a sharp contrast to Las Nevada’s at this hour. Wilbur looked at the man at his side, hoping to gauge a reaction, but Quackity’s face was hard as he stared across at the nation like it was the bane of his existence. “I thought you were here to keep me company, not question me,” Quackity grinds out, looking like he’s holding himself back from screaming, or crying, or both. And so Wilbur just shrugs, and places the bag down. Immediately, Quackity throws it open and so the work begins.

Wilbur watches silently as Quackity takes out as much as he can carry and starts making his way around the edge of the shore to the first building he can find. He looks back briefly at Wilbur, indicating for the other man to follow. And while his face remains stony, just as he turns away Wilbur catches a glimpse of the other man’s face crumpling. He watches Quackity let out an unsteady breath, before readjusting the materials in his arms and marching into Kinoko Kingdom.

Quackity, Wilbur is learning, is quite the expert when it comes to TNT. The man is methodical, precise in his placement, ensuring that each piece is in the perfect location to do maximum damage. Although Wilbur said he wouldn’t help, he eventually can’t take the boredom of just standing around, and starts to help. He hears no objection from Quackity, and so he assumes that he is alright to continue. They work in near silence, the only sounds coming from the occasional animal or monster in the distance. Suddenly, a thought comes to Wilbur’s head, and so he stands up and walks over to where Quackity is kneeling, fixing a stick of TNT into place. “Quackity, what about Sapnap and Karl?” He asks, and immediately realizes his mistake. He watches Quackity’s entire body tense up, and the man turns to him, face thunderous.

“What about them?” He asks coldly, and for the first time in a very long time, Wilbur is fearful of the man in front of him.

“Are you just going to leave them here? To…. you know….?”

Wilbur doesn’t finish his sentence, knowing that one wrong word could lead to him having a similar fate to Kinoko Kingdom. However, Quackity relaxes, ever so slightly, and turns back to his work. “They’re not here. They went hunting this morning and I heard from Foolish that they would be gone until tomorrow,” he states, voice wavering slightly, but otherwise filled with certainty. Satisfied with Quackity’s answer, Wilbur picks up some more TNT and begins positioning it near a massive pond in the heart of the kingdom. As he’s working, he hears a small voice cut through the silence.“I couldn’t do it with them here. It’s hard enough without them around, but if they were here - it would be impossible.” Quackity has never sounded more vulnerable, his voice soft yet even, but Wilbur can tell there’s a whole world of pain built within those words. So he leaves any questions he had to the side and continues to work through the silence, with only the moon, stars and the loneliest man in the world for company.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

When everything’s done, despite the circumstances, Quackity is weirdly proud of himself. He doesn’t take too long to admire his handy work though, as it may cause him to just take it all back and go home. He begins connecting everything together with one long line of red stone. This surprisingly doesn’t take him too long, and soon he and Wilbur are making their way out of Kinoko Kingdom and back to their perch on the other side of the shore, trailing red stone behind them. Once he’s far enough away, Quackity dares to look back, and regrets it instantly. He sees Kinoko Kingdom for all it is- a clear representation of who Sapnap and Karl are, to others, to each other ,and it’s almost as if you can see the love that lives there. And then, on top of it all, protruding and ugly, is the TNT- Quackity’s doing. Quackity’s mark on the place. That is all he represents; destruction and ruin. Quackity knew there must have been a reason they left him behind, and now he sees it; pure, unadulterated evil . He is the cause of his own pain, his own problems. He gets left behind because when people get to know him- when Sapnap and Karl, his boys, got to know him, all they could do is run in fear. From now on, he is the one calling the shots, because Quackity refuses to ever be left behind again. And if that means being alone, forever, then so be it.

He sniffs and wipes his eyes as he walks, feeling like all of the armour he had put on his heart has fallen away, his wounds have reopened and he’s bleeding out. Over the dull white nose in his ears, he hears Wilbur’s voice in the distance, asking if he’s ok. However he doesn’t pay it any attention, simply connecting the chain of red stone to a button placed on the floor in front of him. He looks up one last time, at the place the loves of his life call home. And then, he presses the button.

If you’d asked him how he wanted this to go, Quackity would’ve described it exactly like this; quick, so quick that you’d miss it if you blink, and then so, so, slowly, like you were watching the life drain from the place. That was exactly what they got. The TNT detonated almost all at once, sending earth and debris flying everywhere. It was almost mesmerizing to watch as in the blink of an eye, something so beautiful was completely maimed. Then came the fire, spreading ever so slowly through what remained of the godforsaken place. As Quackity watched the flames grow, he felt a laugh bubble up in his chest. He let out a light chuckle, until soon he was gasping for breath as he cackled, all the while tears rolled down his face. Soon his laughter mixed with heavy sobs, and he felt Wilbur grip his shoulder, pulling him to face the other man. Wilbur’s face was glowing orange, almost as if it was ablaze along with the city they had just destroyed.

“QUACKITY! Pull yourself together!” He shouted sternly, shaking Quackity by the shoulders harshly. Quackity shoved him off, pushing him away with such force that Wilbur fell back into the sand.

“NO! You know what, fuck you Wilbur!” He spits, pointing down at the man beneath him, “ you don’t get to fucking tell me what to do, when you did the exact same fucking thing not too long ago. Remember that? You did it too, so fuck you. Fuck you for being here, for helping, for listening to me, and fuck you for all the shit you did in the past.” With that, Quackity whips himself around to face the destroyed kingdom in front of him.

“And fuck you!” He screams, not caring who hears or how much his voice wants to give out, “Fuck you and your perfect little kingdom, and your perfect little life. Fuck you guys for telling me you loved me.” His voice cracks at the end of the sentence and slowly his screams turn into heart-wrenching sobs. “Fuck you for pretending you cared. Fuck you for promising me that you’d stay .”

He rips both rings off of his left ring finger and throws them into the water, with such a force that he stumbles forward. He collapses to the ground, the weight of his own heartbreak too much to bear. He feels Wilbur drag him up into his lap, cradling him like a child. When he looks up at Wilbur, the other man gently brings a hand to his face, and wipes the tears from his cheeks. It’s been so long since Quackity has been held like this, that it just makes him cry even harder. He buries his head into Wilbur’s shoulder, crying hysterically into the rough fabric of his coat. His last sentence comes out as nothing more than a whisper, broken and defeated by the pain in his heart.

“F-fuck you guys for promising you would never leave me, a-and then doing it anyway.”

~~~~~~~~~

Wilbur sits in silence as Quackity continues to sob into his chest. He watches the last of what was once Kinoko Kingdom burn and crumble, until there is nothing left but smoldering rubble. The sight was almost soothing, like the quiet that comes after a hurricane. He watches as the sun rises, the night turning into a pale, eerie dawn, sky almost grey, and the tide lapping gently against the shore. The only sound for a long time is Quackity’s uneven breathing, along with the occasional hiccup, until he hears voices in the distance. “Quackity, be quiet,” Wilbur hushes him. Quackity looks up, about to say something when the voices get louder in the distance. They both pause and look over at the remains of Kinoko Kingdom, just as Sapnap and Karl emerge from the tree line. Wilbur hears Quackity suck in a breath as they watch the couple’s faces fall in horror. Karl immediately runs forward, and even from this distance, Wilbur hears him gasp and say, “Oh my god, what happened?”. Meanwhile, Sapnap remains silent, shock plastered across his face as he takes in the rubble. Karl turns back to his fiancé, and Wilbur sees the moment Karl’s shoulders sag and his head drops. “It’s all gone, Sapnap,” he hears him say, and then Sapnap is running forward to catch Karl as he collapses into his arms, crying quietly. Sapnap just bundles his lover up into his arms, tears streaming silently down his own face. After a moment, Sapnap begins to lead them back into the forest, presumably headed for a place to stay near everyone else.

Only when the pair have gone, does Wilbur notice the whimpering. He looks down and finds that Quackity is crying again, quietly this time, and is already staring up at Wilbur. He clutches Wilbur’s jacket and stares at him, eyes pleading for an answer.

“W-why don’t I feel better, Wilbur? Why did that make me feel so much worse?”

And because he doesn’t have an answer, Wilbur just embraces him once more, holding the man close to his chest as he cries.

~~~~~~~~~

“Hello Quackity of Las Nevadas, where have you been?”

If Slime notices Quackity’s puffy eyes, he doesn’t say anything. Wilbur had left him in the same place they began their journey, by the sign at the entrance to the nation. Quackity had been hoping to sneak back in undetected, but of course the innocent creature had been waiting for him at the base of the tower. At least it wasn’t someone like Foolish or Fundy, who would’ve been able to see right through him in his current state. Quackity runs a hand through his hair, and stuffs his hands in his pockets.

“Sorry Slime, I went out for a walk early this morning.”

Slime simply tilts his head, curiosity written all over his face.

“Where did you go?”

Quackity sighs, racking his brain for an excuse. It’s too early, and he’s too tired to be doing this. He gives up on trying to lie.

“It doesn’t matter.”

He starts making his way back to his tower, ready to fall into bed, when Slimes pipes up once more.

“It doesn’t matter? Why? Is it because you’re home now?”

Quackity stops.

He takes a breath, willing the tears down.

He turns around, eyes shining and gives his friend, his true friend, a small, sad smile.

“Yeah Slime. I’m home.”

~~~~~~~~~~~

Sapnap kicks a stone out of his way absentmindedly, strolling through what’s left of his kingdom. He came back to see what he could salvage from the wreckage, after dropping Karl off at Bad’s house to rest. As he strolls by the beach, he stops to pick up a piece of wood lying in the sand. As he does so, he spots something shiny lying just on the edge of the water. He crouches down, and picks it up, only to find 2 engagement rings, each with an initial engraved on them.

He clenches his fist around the rings, heart breaking all over again. He’d recognize those rings anywhere, and he knows what it means, finding them here. He brings his fist up to his lips, pressing a kiss against it, hoping, in vain, that his other love will feel it. He looks out at the water, tears flowing, and prays that someday, they can be what they once were. For now, he places the rings in his pocket carefully, thumbing them over slowly. Before he leaves, he turns back to look at his kingdom once more, and whispers,

“I’m sorry.”

And with that, he heads back to Karl, his fiancé, his home .

<><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><>

I didn't have it in myself to go with grace

'Cause when I'd fight, you used to tell me I was brave

And if I'm dead to you, why are you at the wake?

Cursing my name, wishing I stayed

Look at how my tears ricochet

55 notes · View notes

haechanokeh · 3 years

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I’m right for you [pt. 3]

[teaser] [ Chapter 1 ] [ Chapter 2 ]

(you can play Die For You by The Weeknd while reading this 😌)

pairing: popular college! mark x average! reader

genre: romance, smut, angst, series.

warning: corruption, oral sex (both receiving and giving), cream pie, rough sex, mention of religion, rough sex, self-esteem, psychology, public sex, sub! reader, sex toys. possessive mark two-faced mark

I think I’m right for you, babe. You know what I’m thinking, see it in your eyes. You hate that you want me, hate it when you cry. It ain’t workin’ ‘cause you’re perfect and I know that you’re worth it I can’t walk away. (Die for you by The Weeknd)

today is you case presentation with mark. you were deeply affected of what happened in the cubicle but mark seemed unbothered because he was greeting you as usual. it wasn’t weird, he always greets everyone but what was really weird was your classmates. they were looking at you and it made you felt conscious, they were not saying anything but sometimes you catch them glancing at you but you brushed it off and focus on your brainstorming with mark.

yes you do dislike mark but you thank god that he's your partner. he never missed a question from your professor during case study on the other hand you're just standing beside him dumbly. you only understand the question AND the answer once mark responded. well, mark a very kind person he was, despite of answering it alone he made sure that you're included in the case saying base in y/n and my research, even lied that some are from my own research but of course not. plus, for some odd reason, your classmates' eyes were literally made you uncomfortable to the point you were having a hard time to breathe or your social anxiety attacking you. however, at the very moment, you want to give mark a tight hug for making your life easy.

the whole presentation ended. you were putting your things back to your back while standing while mark scrolling in his phone because his dad texted him asking if he could buy him some new pen. you gasped when an arm was on your shoulder, and that caught mark's attention but he hid his annoyance.

"hey, y/n, i heard you like someone ha?" his brows were playfully raising. it was lucas, he gave mark a meaningful glance but mark smiled confusingly.

"what?" you didn't have any idea what he's telling you.

"i heard someone saw-"

"mark!" mina suddenly appeared calling mark's name a little too loud which made lucas stop from talking. "we're going to a milk tea house, do you want to come with us?"

“y/n, come with us.” lucas pulled you closer to his body. mark was taring at lucas arm around your shoulder. you weren’t aware of mark’s expression because your mind was thinking ways to breakthrough from lucas.

“no!” mina exclaimed. he caught everyone’s attention, and she became flustered. “i mean, we will only make her feel uncomfortable and lucas please remove your arms to y/n, she doesn’t look comfortable.” she mumbled. lucas did remove his arms from you.

“milk tea? can we also come with you?” then the people started to surround mark. it became noisy, knowing you who’s allergic to people and noise sneaked out from the circle and left the room.

mark turned his head to look at you but you’re nowhere to be found. he sighed and forced himself to interact with his classmates.

your mother texted you that he will be away for one week because of their excursion. she left you an allowance good for one week including your meals for the whole day and transportation. you already had your dinner outside. right now you were just laying down on your favorite long sofa in your living room, watching NCT 2020 funny moments. suddenly, mark's name popped. mark is your class representative, he has access to class contacts and it wasn't that mark called you because you're always late in the class so for almost past 3 years he's the one you always contact just to inform the class that you're just late.

wait, did i miss an announcement? you quickly left the class maybe something came up.

"hello, was there an announcement?" you directly asked

"none, just checking you. we haven't had a proper conversation awhile ago unless it's case related."

you heart melted, he's very kind and sweet... that scares you.

"ah okay." you simply answered. it wasn't because you want to talk to him, well you really don't want to talk to him but it wasn't that he's annoying or anything- it was just you hate phone calls. you hate talking with someone in general unless it's your mom.

"well, have you eaten yet?" he tried to save the conversation, he wanted to hear your voice longer.

"yes." it was a one-word reply.

mark was slightly shattered because you don't seem to want to talk to him. he just thought that maybe you were tired.

"okay, goodnight."

"yeah." then you hang up.

you returned watching youtube until you drifted into your dreamland... no it wasn't your dreamland.

you gasped and sat up as you woke from another perverted dream with mark. your chest was rising aggressively and you look down as you felt the wetness between your thighs. you raked your hands over your hair as you felt frustration and guilt. this was your second time that you dreamt of mark doing erotic things. you looked at the digital clock it was already 2 am. you groaned and stood up, you want to wash your body because the stickiness just made you feel more guilty if it stays there longer.

you entered your room and stripped, walking directly into your bathroom. you opened a warm shower and as the water trickled on your body, hands unconsciously trailing to the south. your dream was so hot, you can't lie about that. it was in the same cubicle but instead of his digits, it was his dick inside you.

your eyes closed as you rubbed your bead slow while recalling your dream. you squeezed your left breast and imagining it was mark's squeezing it. you want something to fill your womanhood so you inserted your two fingers and thrust it. your lungs felt like being suppressed by pressure, your thrust became furious.

"oh my- mark fuck." you moaned his name and you have never been so ashamed. it was so wrong but the feeling was so good that you weren't able to stop yourself from moaning. you felt the tension in your thighs. you knelt down and the hand that squeezing your breast was now on your clit rubbing it furiously.

"mark! fuck right there." you felt the tension in your abdomen and your legs started to shake. your body just gave in, bending down, cheek shoved against the wet tiles while the warm water splashed on your body.

you screamed erotically, eyes rolling and lashes flickering. your legs were shaking as you reached your high.

mark hasn't slept yet, it's okay for him because there are no classes. he was staring at the ceiling and mind preoccupied by you.

he was trying to understand why do you keep pushing him away even though you clearly wanted him too. mark did remember where you say he's very different from you, and so? what's wrong with it? what he didn't like is the thought of changing just for a single person but...

"shall i?" he chuckled bitterly. he was really close to his insanity. he feared that this affection will grow into something that is uncontrollable- like an obsession.

he checked the time through his phone. it's 5 in the morning. he decided to jog outside, so, he took a quick shower and wore his tracksuit and running shoes. maybe if tiredness hits him, he will feel sleepy. mark already went to your house and he didn't tell you that his house is just a few blocks away from you, instead of going to his normal route, he changed it, jogging in your house direction.

when he was closed to your street, he was surprised to see you outside. he stood and admire your naturalness from afar. your hair was disheveled, your eyes weren't completely closed yet, and your face was a little puffy but it doesn't take away your beauty. plus, your cute teddy bear pajamas made him smile. he sends his gratitude to god because he created a masterpiece.

yeah, mark is deeply in love and he thinks there's no way out of this feeling.

you were actually waiting for your breakfast, your pancakes from mcdonalds and a warm chocolate drink. when the delivery arrived, you paid and gave him a tip for being quick. you were about to go back inside when you heard a VERY familiar voice which was owned by the person who sleep deprived you

"Y/N!" his voice was loud, it even cracked.

"what are you doing here?" you asked.

"morning jog, and good morning to you." he replied and greeted at the same time.

"jog.." you paused and gasped. "from your condo to here?!" you exclaimed in disbelief. mark laughed at your reaction. of course it'll shock you because you already been in his condo and if he jogged it from there to here, he was supposed to be passing out right now.

"no, my family house is actually a few blocks away from here." he said.

WHAT?! this is not good. you thought. the more he gets closer the more he has access to your mind and body. you masked your displeased face and just nodded.

"okay, ahm. i'm heading back now. bye." you pointed at your house door and awkwardly turned your back walking towards your door.

you expected him to do something because he always do that but to your disappointment he didn't. you looked back to check if he was stil there but he was no longer standing there but you saw him jogging away from your direction. you sighed in disappoinment that made you mentally slap yourself for feeling very contradicting .

you ate miserably your affordable and favorite pancake.

mark took a bathe and go down to eat breakfast together with his parents. they prayed before eating. the cooked food by his mom made him question why your ordered delivery food for breakfast.

"how's school?" mark's dad asked him.

"good, still the same." he replied.

"your father will lead a service, you can invite your classmates. oh mina, you can invite her, she's very sweet girl." his mom said but she doesn't have any motive. she knew mark have not interest in romantic relationship as of the moment, her child was so focus in maintaining his grades and scholarship. at least, that's what he though.. if she only knew.

"i'll try." he forced a smile but behind it was growing tiredness. he knew that his classmates doesn't really want to praise but because they were so fond of mark and they just love to hang out. it defeated the purpose of going to church.

after the breakfast, mark's parent left for their work. he washed the dishes and went up stairs and stayed in his room with his music and guitar. it helped to detach his mind from thinking of you, but it was just temporary as he saw you name appeared in his phone. he almost threw his guitar just to answer your call very quick.

"y/n? why?" he sound so excited.

"ahm, mark... well.. perhaps, do you ahm, have notes from yesterdays discussion? i mean in all cases, not just ours?" you were very stuttering because of shyness. your class have long test about the cases but you're notes are everywhere and you can't understand your writings.

"yes." he said. he knew where this is going. he quickly get out from his bed and go straight to his closet, choosing shirt to wear. "do you need it? i can bring it to you."

"no, no. ahm, you do digital notes right? mind if you could send it through gdrive?" you really don't want to bother him... nah lies. you're just preventing things from happening.

mark paused for a moment and was a little hurt, he understood your statement as if you don't want to see him. but mark will not having any of that.

"it was handwritten though." he faked sorry. he hoped you didn't notice what he did there, hoping that you received it as if it was literally handwritten like directly to paper since he sounded apologetic.

"oh... i see. well, ahm, can you drop by in the house?"

mark still not satisfied by just dropping by.

"how about we study together? we can review together."

you translated it like 'the smartest in your class can help you'and that's very tempting. you can't easily study 8 cases and you need him. you used his diuretics notes in lecture, you almost aced it. now, your lab needs him.

"then, pizza is okay for you?" you whisoered from the other end.

mark secretly fist pump and grinned in triumph.

"yes."

you spayed air freshener in your living room and changed your shirt to another shirt? you only have tees just in different colors, you changed your short into black sweatpants. you made sure that your hair was far different from the hair he saw this morning. you already ordered the pizza.

the doorbell rang. your quickly opened the door for him. mark was standing, carrying his ipad and his other hand holding a two milk teas in a cup holder. he's wearing dark blue t-shirt and gray sweatpants. you smiled awkwardly and let him in. you scanned his body, looking for paper or at least a piece of paper but you didn't see any of it. mark was looking down at you, watching you observing him.

"where's your notes?" you curiously asked.

"here." he lifted his ipad. your jaw dropped.

"i thought you did not do digital notes?"

"i don't recalling telling you i didn't, i just said it was handwritten and when i saif that handwritten in my ipad." he reasoned. taht made you think later realizing that he was right and that made you dumb.

you sighed in defeat.

"by the way, bought you milk tea since you missed it yesterday." he said, you acually don't care if you missed it or not.

you walked towards the single couch and patted it.

"you can seat here." you said.

he quickly sat down and put the milk teas on top of your living room's table. he confusingly watched you when you sat on the long couch and it was the end of it. you were too far from him.

you noticed his sulking face.

"mr. mark lee, what's with your long face?" you chuckled teasingly.

"why are you too far from me?" he pouted.

"damage control." you replied shortly and get your case 3 notes which is very illegible to read. "can i borrow your case 3?"

"why? what did i do?" mark asked was clueless. he did not pay attention to your question

"mark, being alone with you is not healthy anymore." you directly answered him.

"orgasm is healthy, what do you mean?" mark didn't get your.

"mark, that's not what i mean. we're like horny teenagers doing unappropriate things."

"we're already passed in that phase in life, we're both adults." he rebutted.

you mentally face palmed yourself in frustration. why is he so smart and dumb at the same time.

"mark, that's not why i mean. we're being to touchy, every time we are left alone the next thing we knew we're touching each other. do you know how scary was that to me? it only happened twice but i am already longing for more! when i don't feel your touches i go craaazy! i even touched myself for freaking 2-" you froze when you realize what you were telling him you stared blankly at him.

on the other hand, mark was very pleased hearing you exploded from frustration as you became honest for the first time.

"you touched yourself? what 2?" he smirked and lifted his brows.

you cleared your throat.

"can i borrow your ipad? i need your case 3." you murmured and look anywhere but him your face heat up. you want to be swallowed by your favorite sofa.

"then get it."

you look at his ipad sitting on his manly wide spread apart thighs. your eyes stared at the mark that makes your knees weak and wet pussy. his fiery eyes looking directly toyou while he was sitting comfortably on the couch and arms are both in each side of the armrest.

"mark lee, i need it." you tried to use your stern voice but failed because your voice was too small.

"i told you, you can get it.. here." he glanced at his ipad.

you gulped and the living room's air became thick. your submissive self switched on and you just found yourself walking towards him. your hands felt cold as you reached for his ipad. when you lifted it, his bulge forming in his gray sweatpants made you almost drool. you were reminded how fucking hot it was.

you want to touch it and do anything you can possibly could but your single rational braincells keeping you in the light.

"you don't seem sure of what you really wanted to do." he snapped you from overthinking. "should i make you choices?"

"what?" you asked confusingly but your voice was shaking.

"you bring that ipad with you and go back to where you were sitting, or..." he looked up to you with his dark eyes, leaning a little forward you trace the side of your hips with his palm..

"put the ipad on the table and sit in my lap."

mark knew that you can never say no at this state. if you could only see how your body shivered and how defeated your face was, he knew you already gave in.

and his was right.

the original draft was deleted because of my stupidity 😭 idk think this is good as the original draft.

hello, some of you asked me if i have a tag list, i will be creating one.

✨if you want to be added in I'm Right For You Tag List, you can DM or Ask me so i can add you ✨

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Tag List:

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anyways, i would like to say thank you for supporting this story. i did not expect some of you will like it. i also want to thanks people who leaving message through dms and ask praising this story. also to those nctzens hearting it 🥺🤗

#mark lee #nct mark #mark lee smut #mark lee fanfic #mark lee nct #mark lee imagines #mark lee scenarios #mark #nct 127 #mark lee angst #nct #mark lee imagine #nct dream #nct 127 smut #mark lee scenario #mark smut

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hoseokslefteyebrow · 3 years

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“ Don't worry, you're safe now.” || Homicidal Lui

Pairing : Yandere! Homicidal Lui X Reader

Genre : Fluff, Angst, Yandere

Summary : In which insane meets broken.

Wordcount: 2k lol

WARNINGS : Yandere ;), someone dies but it's not very gore or sum, he's already insane, but in here he loses even more sanity, abusive household.

Headcanon

Aight so to start it off, you didn't know Lui before he developed Sully

Or knew him in general, that you didn't either

You met Lui in a very odd way.

You met him at the drugstore, simply because you needed toothpaste and he needed whatever.

At this moment Lui was Lui, not Sully who tended to take over control more than what was supposed to.

You had accidentally bumped into him in one of the aisles, and unlike most people who'd stop to stare at his face, you simply apologized and went on with your life.

This of course is the most normal action for basically every humane person, but for someone who was looked down upon due to his facial features and his silence, it was the start of something..

That might be growing into one big disease.

How Sully met you was in the most stereotypical way, he had simply come to kill you, not knowing who you are.

Sully had never been very picky on who to kill, he simply broke in, outed his frustration, and left.

That was the original plan with you too, at least for Sully's part.

Until he was straddling you, knife pressed to your throat, and realized you were actually very much awake.

You weren't screaming at him to get off, yet he could see the fear in your eyes.

Maybe it was because his hand was on your mouth, and so he decided to play a little.

And so took his hand off, yet you still didn't scream.

After a moment of doing nothing, he sat back, rather calmly, placing his full weight on your body and looked at you curiously.

Much to his confusion, you didn't really react, just keeping eye contact, fear filling up your irises even more

" Ar- aren't you g-going to kill, me?" You ask him in a shaking voice, unable to keep yourself from stuttering.

By the sound of your voice, Sully switches forcefully into Lui, and you can only watch in fear and confusion what's happening around you.

Because it does look rather terrifying, a man first sneaks into your house, and is suddenly at you with a blade in your neck, and as you speak, he throws himself off you, and is now holding his head in his hands, blade fallen to the ground with a loud sound.

You flinch as the unknown male to you also drops to the ground, mumbling to himself.

The sound of his knees hitting the ground must've been loud, because soon after the hallway lamp is turned on, and you hear the sound of footsteps approaching.

And then you're shaking Lui, and you're telling him to hurry up and leave, apologizing along with it.

By the sound of even more in your stuttering voice, even Sully becomes quiet.

And so Lui actually takes the moment to study you.

Now with the dull light from the hallway, you appear to be injured.

He's not sure how bad it is, but there's blue and purple spots dancing all over your skin.

Underneath your thin white shirt, he can even spot a very nasty black one, and suddenly he spots the scars on your arms too.

He's brought back to the scene in front of him when your voice has turned into panic as someone tries to open the door to your room.

He doesn't even process what he's doing before he's pushing his knife, which he had picked up from the ground, into your hands.

" You need it more than us."

And then he's gone, trough the window into the streets.

You flinch when your father opens the door, knowing what you're in for.

He returns to your room the next night, not sure as to why himself.

He's left disappointed when your room is empty, tough his knife, which he had left behind, is clean and on the pillow, on top of a paper.

Upon picking it up, he realizes it's a note.

' I'm not sure if you'll ever come back, but here's the knife you left behind, you told me I'd need it, but I really don't.'

He looks around the room, spotting a pen in the corner on the ground, and decides to write you back.

' what's your name?'

The next night he returns again, hoping he'd get an answer.

Instead, he's met by an empty bedroom once again.

He doesn't know why, or how, but for the first time in a while, he feels disappointment spread in his chest

Due to Lui feeling a little down, Sully's easily able to take over, and he walks them into the forest.

Sully doesn't know why either, but suddenly he's in a part of the forest they're not familiar with.

And then he hears the sound of a twig breaking behind him, and he's turning around.

He's shocked to find you standing there.

He can see the fear in your eyes, but is surprised to see that there's less of it than last time he saw you.

Your posture is also relaxed, and then he realizes, you're not afraid of him.

He's not sure on how to feel by that.

" My name's Y/N." You tell him dryly.

He's blinking, not sure what you mean, before he's stumbling again, switching back to Lui by the sound of your voice.

" I'm- I'm Lui, he was Sully." Lui stutters.

You turn your head at him in curiosity.

" He? Is there a voice in your head?" You ask him, tough it doesn't sound like you're mocking him, simply asking him a question.

" Ah, no. I have a split persona." He tells you, somewhat awkwardly.

" What's that like?" You ask him.

By that simple question alone, you've made him feel human, like a guy his age.

Sully doesn't like it one bit, this feeling you're giving the both of them.

The three of you end up meeting near the forest for the next few weeks.

Over those weeks, Lui and Sully get to know you better.

And get to know Lui too, tough Sully keeps himself shadowed.

He's always in the back of Lui's mind, of course, whenever you're around, Lui feels like Sully's just, closer.

He doesn't know why, and he's worried about that.

It's not until you don't show up unannounced like usual, that Sully makes an appearance again.

She might not want to see us today, Sully, maybe we should give her space. Lui tells his other persona.

She's ours, Lui, can't you see that? And we can just call it a visit, she can tell us off if she wants. Sully tells Lui, who's still not into the idea.

We're going. And with that he takes control.

Once they arrive, Sully's happy to have taken control over the situation.

The moment he hears your voice he freezes.

The sound of it isn't melodic and relaxed, instead, it's trembling and weak.

Sully doesn't like it.

He originally didn't plan to intervene, but when the sound of something breaking reaches his ears, he's quick to check it out.

The scene in that greets him makes the already burning fire rage on even worse.

Because a few meters away from him, at the other end of the hallway is where you are cowering in front of an older man, who's got a broken bottle in his hand, glass shards around the two of you, and your arms in front of you to protect you from, what must've been, the blow which the whiskey bottle had given you.

Sully's not the only one who's seeing red.

Kill him.

It's Lui who's giving out the command this time, to end this man's life.

But then you see him and you're quick to run to him and pull him away from the scene.

Sully blushes at the contact your skin makes with his.

" I'm sorry you had to see that. Are you okay?" You ask him tenderly.

He blinks at you.

You were the one who received the blow, there's a thin trail of blood trailing down your arm, and you're standing in shorts in cold weather, yet you're asking him if he's okay?¿

" Who was that fucker?" He asks instead, not even bothered to ask if you're okay.

Because he knows, no matter what your answer is, you're not.

" My father. But, it's not his fault. He- he was drunk." You tell him softly, truly not meaning your abusive father any harm.

" Tch." Sully doesn't even say anything before he shrugs his jacket off and unceremoniously dumps it on top of your head.

" Wear it. It's cold." He tells you, acting like some kind of low budget tsundere.

" So you're Sully?" You ask him.

That catches him off guard.

" How did someone as dumb as you know?" He asks you.

" I'm not dumb. And Lui usually blushes a lot more." You tell him, putting his jacket on.

Sully's lowkey impressed by the answer, and your attitude.

And so you finally get to know him too.

It takes a lot of convincing, but at the end of the day, your father lives.

Over the next few days, you grow even closer with the two of them.

And subconsciously, Sully becomes a little too fond of you.

It's during the daytime one day when Sully and Lui talk about this feeling both of them have for you.

It doesn't take a long conversation, and they decide to confess to you that night.

However, they're left disappointed, and angry, as you turn them down.

Lui thinks it's because of his scars, while Sully thinks you're feeling too bound down by your father.

The real reason ( and the one you've told them) is that it's because you simply don't like him that way.

The next few nights they don't show up, which leaves you disappointed.

You're not aware of the big, bloody mess you've created.

After a few toughs , Sully comes with a suggestion to make an end to your misery, and to free you from your father's abusive hold, permanently.

Lui is at first against this, after all, you did tell him to not do that, but after some persuasion of Sully, he's in too.

That night, they show up at your house, greeting you by stepping in trough the window.

You're not the first house they're 'visiting' that night, and so you start to cry when you see him all bloodied up, sharp eyes telling you that he's nit here for a visit.

Your first tough is that he's come to kill you, because you turned him down of course.

However, as he spots the tears escaping your eyes, he's quick to come to your side and hush you.

" Don't worry sweetheart, we've come to free you."

And then he's walking into the hallway, and moving to another room.

You're quick to understand his intentions.

He's come to kill your father.

The first two rooms he checks out are a fail, one being the bathroom and one being a study.

However, Sully is annoyed when you stand in his way, trying to avoid his kill.

You're a little stronger than you look, and manage to keep him off the other male in the room for a while.

While Sully initially did not want to hurt you, he decides against his own decisions, and knocks you out with the hilt of his knife.

You hear him mutter something along the lines of " Don't worry, I'll take good care of you."

When you wake up again, you're placed on an uncommon bed, Lui, or Sully, at your side, softly looking over you with a crazed look in their eyes and a sickly sweet smile.

" Don't worry, we're safe now."

A/N: Tell me what you think about this writing style, and what I can write better ;). Also, Creepypasta requests are still open.

#creepypasta #creepypasta x reader #yandere creepypasta #creepypasta one shot #homicidal liu #homicidal lui x reader #yandere x reader

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twstheadcanons · 3 years

Note

This is a lore question and a slightly specific one. Cater as a character and otherwise is super interesting to me but at the same time insanely confusing. While at first I thought he would end up having maybe slightly abusive family there's a possibility that's not the case. His sister's seem to enjoy dolling him up and his mother seems to go along with it and his father's a bit more absent. I think I would mainly like to know what his true self is truly reflecting and also if Trey seems to know about this 'true version'. Don't feel pressured to anwser this if you can't btw ❣️

Cater fans come get yall’s food.

S, iideally I’d go through events Cater’s prominent in (Beans Day, Halloween), but that would just make this whole post longer. So I’ll be using Cater’s card stories for now. What we know about Cater, on the surface level, is that he comes across as happy-go-lucky, energetic, social, trendy, superficial, flaky, and insensitive at times. But that’s Cater on a surface level.

So for Cater, his major issues from his background are:

his family frequently moving to accommodate his father’s occupation as a banker

his sisters dragging him into their own interests that he was expected to accommodate as well

Cater repeatedly states he disliked getting dragged around by his sisters and having cutesy stuff he wasn’t genuinely interested in shoved into his face. This would even happen on his birthday, where his sisters got him things they’re more likely to enjoy, which made Cater feel frustrated since he was supposed to be the focus on his own birthday. But despite that annoyance, Cater understands his sisters didn’t really mean any harm. From the sounds of it, they liked hanging out with Cater, and assumed that Cater enjoyed how they spent time together as well since Cater preferred to go with the flow, rather than rock the boat.

In his Bday SSR, Cater mentions that his sisters became more considerate of his own interests and asked him what he wanted. All three coming from a family where they move and lose close friends a lot, the sisters are probably close and want to stay close to their brother as well, since they’re the only consistent company in a similar age range. His sisters are each other’s best friends, Cater didn’t have that growing up. He also mentions his sisters and mother’s sweets-making kick, and how he eventually got over having sweets every day. But when he protested, it’d disappoint and sadden them/they’d have dejected looks on their faces, which Cater didn’t know how to handle, so he made himself go along with their whims to keep them happy.

This pours into his social media life, where he’s a peppy, cheery guy that posts upbeat content and responds with light, casual, carefree messages to people. His Lab SR literally has him state that he ‘should always be happy and excited, after all’. So, clearly, whatever dynamic the Diamond family has, while not what I’d call something as heavy as abuse, isn’t considerate of Cater’s feelings and views Cater’s ‘go with the flow’ ways as approval. If he ‘breaks character’ of the devil-may-care person he is on the surface, it raises questions, and Cater would rather just avoid all that and enjoy himself instead of getting involved in anything heavy.

Again, Cater doesn’t like to rock the boat. He also mentions in his Lab SR that this obsession with cutesy stuff became rather invasive, and he’d even be criticised or second-guessed if he didn’t go along with the idea. Cater ends up accommodating that interest to prevent any debate, even if he didn’t actually care for them. That said, with such an emphasis on aesthetics being the way he grew up, Cater has a good understanding and practical knowledge of decour and eye-catching designs, which makes him helpful and invaluable when the time calls for decour. This is something Cater knows he’s good at, and enjoys showing off since the focus is on himself and he’s acknowledged for his skills.

With their family moving all the time, Caters gained and lost friends a lot. Cater has an outgoing personality, at this point, it’s safe to assume he’s an extrovert, so making friends comes naturally to him. But when you’re moving a lot, maybe sometimes in the middle of a school term, . Cater needs engagement and social interaction, but at this point in his life, he’s tired of trying to keep up with old and new friends on deep levels, hence his interest and obsession with social media.

One thing to note about Cater: he likes cutting corners. a lot.

In his R card “Portrait of Rosalia”, it’s understood that Cater being nice to Rosalia by throwing her a party with some lively students around is a way for him to get on her good side, because Rosalia overhears the teachers’ discussions of tests and future lessons so that he wouldn’t have to study for an upcoming history test: while Cater’s idea of a party to lift Rosalia’s spirits is in good nature, he wants something out of it that benefits him. But while disappointed the plan didn’t work, he’s quick to brush it off, and Rosalia’s anger, by mentioning that she’s cuter when uptight anyway.

In his PE card “This betrayer!” Cater only have five laps left to do in PE. But he hates how sweaty he is and how tedious the overall task is. So he uses his UM to try and avoid doing all five laps himself. Riddle catches him red-handed, and Cater tries - albeit I’m sure he knows it’s a lost cause - to flatter Riddle at the last minute. Trey’s also involved, and despite leaving Cater in the dust, Trey also returns with Riddle, because Trey knows that Cater’s the type that tries to cut corners whenever possible, something against the rules in Heartslabyul. Honestly, as far as Trey goes, Trey’s someone used to the way Riddle holds himself back. Cater’s exterior personality wouldn’t be hard for Trey to recognise as Cater pushing himself or exaggerating points of his personality just to keep up an image. especially after being in the same dorm for three years.

In short, while he isn’t malicious about majority of the time, Cater will use others to get out situations and tasks he wants no part of. This is a huge thing reflected in his UM, as it allows Cater to be in more than one place, so that he personally doesn’t have to be involved. Growing up with two pushy older sisters, it makes he develops a UM that complements a need for escape when pure wit won’t work. And despite being someone with a superficial interest in trends, that experience accumulates in him understanding the basics about social media and how it affects others, himself included, since it became the only way he could stay in contact with acquaintances and ‘friends’ from previous years.

Cater has a good understanding of how people, in general, work, especially those in his agegroup, which makes him rather crafty when he wants to string others along and get out of a situation. This doesn’t make Cater a mean or conniving person, and in fact, he’s generally amicable and social. Cater lives by a pretty ‘live in the moment’ credo. He enjoys having fun and not getting overly serious about issues when he can help it. There are instances where he doesn’t care about the situation he’s in, or thinks it’s lame/boring, but he tries to make the most of it as something to post about on MagiCam later to engage in low-effort social interaction for a mental break.

Cater pretty much states this in his Halloween SSR:

“If I left there, they remained there. That’s why I’d rather have a casual and happy time with everyone instead of going steady. It’s like a circus troupe, you know, having fun hanging with people all over the world and then leaving. And that’s why MagiCam is the best. I suddenly got messages from acquaintances from the school I went to 3 years ago. Aren’t my casual and light relationships multiplying? It’s lovely! “

Social media helps him keep in contact with people on a low-effort level, so the risk of moving doesn’t damage his relationships online like it would physical friendships. As for family, Cater’s feelings towards his family are difficult, tricky ones he has problems with. He certainly doesn’t hate them, but their lifestyle, the moving and pushy personalities, don’t mesh well with Cater’s personality overall. When Lilia tries to relate to Cater’s experiences of fleeting relationships, Cater can’t help but dismiss Lilia’s empathy as surface-level, since, to CATER’S knowledge (it’s not like he knows Lilia’s old as shit), Lilia’s always lived in the VoT with his own family and friends, which hits a sore spot with Cater:

““Cater: ….Family…huh.

Flashback Lilia: I feel like I understand you. But it is just as Cater says, it might be the truth that you should not attach yourself too much to one person in particular.

Flashback ends Cater: (That was full of lies. For a guy who grew up in the same place and never had to deal with rebuilding relations over and over… He wouldn’t understand my worthless and meaningless feelings.)

/Notification

Cater: Hello, Trey. What’s up? Huh? Are we doing our rehearsal for our night show at the stamp rally now? And is Deuce from my committee lacking in hands, so Ace is helping him out? Darn, Ace is definitely going to use this to ask me for a favor later!

Cater: Argh! And is Riddle on the verge of a rampage? I’ll be back soon, Trey, please calm him! It was such a pain getting involved in the biggest crisis of this Halloween week! No, for real! I’m not lying. That’s why you don’t have to say such cold things to me, kay? URGH, TREY, YOU’RE SO CRUEL!!

Cater: Now that Diasomnia’s turmoil has settled, it’s time to change the mood. No matter how you slice it, we’ll still separate if we become 4th years… It would be different if I repeated a year though. Anyway, I should just enjoy the memories I’m making “now”! I’ll surprise everyone with this charming skeleton costume! I’ll show them my serious side!”

Cater calls his own feelings ‘worthless and meaningless’, which likely ties into how he got dragged into his mother and sisters’ own interests over his own, and sometimes even criticised if he didn’t go with their flow. He also expects the friendships he’s made in NRC (as we see with him talking to Trey about the rest of the Heartslabyul cast), to inevitably disappear after he and Trey are fourth years with their own internships and lives to live. Because to Cater, the future of his life and relationships appear disruptive and inconsistent, so instead of fretting about them, he wants to live in the moment and enjoy what he’s doing at all times, hence why he cuts corners to make things easier on himself. This is why he can come across as superficial and easy to get along with, because he doesn’t want to fret over the details.

unrelated but we’re team ‘former dorm leader cater’ here because him doing it because it sounds cool and fun fits perfectly with his personality

#cater diamond #twisted wonderland #Anonymous

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