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zoropookie · 19 hours

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HOW HATERS ARE BORN (HHAB)

♡ chapter thirty-eight — why couldn't it be mini-golf? (💋)

[[ALL WRITTEN CHAPTER]]

The dinner party was quiet for the first part.

But not the kind of quiet that would have made anyone into a bad type of uncomfortable. No, it was the kind of quiet that usually hangs heavy in the air with a clear path to stop it. But that path mentioned was definitely not going to be brought up anytime soon, nor even uttered.

The "path" being the eventual contemplation of both your and Kuni's relationship. Or..."relationship"? You had no idea. And frankly? You were too annoyed by Venti's chewing to even think about it right now.

There sat the bodies of Hu Tao, Thoma, Aether, Lumine, Heizou, Yanfei, Ayaka, Xiao, Kazuha, Venti, Kuni, and you at a very long table with what felt like it had no end in sight. Only sounds were the soft clinking of silverware against the china and the eventual murmur of someone to another. It was similar to faint ripples disturbing the surface of the pond.

Venti, seated next to you, was eating away with an unbothered look, feasting at his second dish of the hot pot with numerous amounts of meat. "Oh my god," He said with his mouth full, exaggerated smacks and crunches that seemed to echo louder than the previous ones, grating irritably on your nerves. "Brilliant. I mean, who came up with this?!"

"Been a thing for...forever, actually." Kuni's eyes dulled as he replied with the most unamused tone imaginable, swirling his chopsticks in the soup stock.

"Do you live under a rock?" Hu Tao's eyes narrowed, ever the lively one as she plopped a piece of well marinated pork in her mouth. "It's a common thing, not very new, dumbass."

"Ohhh, no. Don't go and try and make me look like the dumbass." Venti pointed. "Scara~ I know that you were too lazy to try and think of an actual dinner for us out of your busy schedule, but it really reminds me of how creative you can be anyway. I mean, a steamboat?! Your mind! Can I still call you Scara?"

"No." He replied flatly, not even looking up from his bowl.

"Where did you find this?" Venti marveled. "Genius invention, if I do say so myself. Like, watch this." And with that, he put the raw piece of beef inside of the boiling hot broth.

The beef had bubbled inside of the broth, cooking the meat almost instantly. The rich aroma was wafting throughout all of the visitor's nostrils, leaving a tempting bubble of juice that lightly coated the beef he pulled out, making your own mouth water despite your annoyance.

"You wanted to show us... you cooking meat?" Ayaka asked, her voice tinged in a genuine and curious way, wondering if there was an end confirmation to this. Unfortunately, there wasn't, and the rest of the table sighed.

"You know what guys, the art of cooking is lost on a lot of people, don't expect you to know about it. I wish that you could see how philosophical every thin slice that goes into your mouth is, but I'm not your own eyes." Venti threw his hands up in defense.

"Venti...when the pot is at a very high temperature, the meat inside of it usually tends to cook after a few seconds. That's how it works." Aether slowly told him, to which Hu Tao narrowed her eyes in a death-like stare.

"But what about the journey of that high temperature cooked meat?" Venti continued, his tone almost as philosophical as his aggravating chewing. "The laughs, the memories, the stories, preparing this meal together. That's...what makes this dinner more special than others. Our first."

"And our last." Kuni rolled his eyes, clearly unimpressed. "I didn't let you guys into my house just for him to give us a TED Talk on the importance of family time. Just eat the fucking food and save us the theatrics."

"There's no point, he's just going to keep at it." Yanfei sighed in defeat. "He knows what he did. This will never end as long as we're all alive."

"Yeh? What did I do that was that awful?" Venti raised an eyebrow, his lips curving into a pout. "Because what I did do was put those two together at a dinner table right now. You're welcome, by the way." He poked the direction towards you and Kuni.

"He's got a point..." Thoma let out a small chuckle, gaze flicking to the both of you. "You're both being civil right now. Most times you'd just try to bite your tongue whenever you were around each other."

"That's so not true." You scoffed. "I'd say I was very civil. Me, at least. Can’t say the same about others."

"Yeah? Throwing me under the bus now?" Kuni shot you a withering glare. "You asked me out first, don't think I don't remember when we were about to get in the car."

"Hey, quick tip for when you're stuck in conversations you don't want to be in: being proactive helps. Being a fake flirt helps. Someone had to break the ice, and it wasn't going to be you." You shrugged.

"By flirting with me?"

"I mean, it got your attention, didn't it?" Hu Tao replied, leaning back in her chair. "You're smitten."

"I am not smitten. I have intense feelings that should be mutual." His eyebrow quirked up, a hint of amusement softening his features. No matter how defensive his tone was, he knew he couldn't believe anything he said. "You shouldn't be chastising me anyway. I already made myself clear before you got here that I hate the shady shit."

"And I made myself clearer that I didn’t want anything from you right now, no?" You retorted immediately, head shooting towards him with a glare, tone clipped and snippy. "You'd be smart not to bring it here."

Tension rose to a great extent as your words began to make everyone uncomfortable, with the exceeding silence and awkwardness that ruminated between you and Kuni. It was pretty much just the two of you that were giving off an aura like no other. Safe to say that even Venti's attempt of getting the both of them to ease up from what they eventually have to do was a failure.

You glanced at Venti after he began to start moaning despite this, and sighed inwardly. Only he of all people could manage to make eating a piece of meat sound like something else. You threw your chopsticks back on the table, it causing a metallic thud. "Alright. I think I'm done."

"I'm sorry that I'm trying to bring liveliness that you all lack right now. Why is so quiet anyway?" Venti asked, his eyes looking around at everyone's suddenly shifted demeanor.

"You shouldn't be encouraging Venti to be loud, Thoma." Lumine hesitated in her words, trying to disengage the situation. "Let's just do an exercise. We'll say something really nice about the person next to us, and if you have nothing to say, you're going to stay here and help Kuni pick apples as a summer job."

Heizou shot up immediately, slamming his hands down on the table. "I have nothing nice to say about anyone here. Fuck all of you."

"Fat fucking chance. Sit your ass back down." Kuni snarled.

Kazuha frowned, furrowed brow betraying his own confusion. "What did we do...?"

Lumine squinted at him, taken aback by his words before pressing her lips together. "You have to play the game first to decide that, jackass."

“Well, this game already isn’t very fun.” Heizou blurted, saltily sitting back down. “Easy enough for nobody to jump me here though, I’ll take all the compliments I can get.”

"I’m glad that Kazuha and Thoma are sitting next to you and not me.” Hu Tao’s eyes dulled. “I’d blow my brains out before I ever compliment a child trafficker.”

“Okay, good thing we’re not starting with you, then.” Lumine argued with the both of them. “Fuck,” She muttered under her breath, composing herself before she had to speak again. “Then, since you’re one of the last letters of the alphabet, You go first, Xiao.”

Xiao picked his head up, his sharp eyes scanning for the person next to him who just so happened to be Venti. “Oh,” He paused, the rest of the table waiting for his response as Venti excitedly bounced in his seat. “I don’t want to play.”

Venti’s shoulders dropped. “Are you kidding? C’mon, you can’t think of anything?”

“Said he doesn’t want to play, this is our group therapy dinner where consent is the Hail Mary. No compliments for you, too bad, so sad.” Hu Tao stuck her tongue out playfully.

“Your attitude right now is the main reason that one of these days you’re going to get scammed so bad by a pyramid scheme that you’re actually going to start believing the Tupperware you’re selling is valuable. It’s not. It never will be.” Venti squinted.

Hu Tao sat there for a minute, looking into the other’s eyes before scrunching her nose up. “Are you okay? That was extremely specific.”

The rest of the table was silent, until Lumine sighed quietly. “Okay…Xiao, can you at least try to come up with something so we can move on? You don’t have to do it again, this is just a one time thing.”

“I’m grateful,” Yanfei gritted her teeth inwardly. “Never thought I’d have to be genuine anytime soon. Why couldn’t it be mini golf?”

He let out a slow breath, clearly reluctant to even participate in this obviously forced exercise. The more he stalled, though, the longer it was going to take to ebb how uncomfortable it is. “Venti,” He began, voice steady but devoid of emotion. “Your music is very refined.”

Venti clutched at his own heart, making a sound like he just got punched in the gut. “I’ll take it. That’s so cute of you.”

“Yeah! This is a really good exercise for us! We haven’t gotten the time to really appreciate each other as friends.” Thoma smiled. “Go ahead, Venti! Say something nice about (Y/N)!”

“Right.” Venti turned his head to you, trying to fully grasp what he wanted to say. It left eye contact with him very unsettling. “Hm…no matter what happens to you, you’ve still proven that you deserve what you have. Keeping that energy lead you to many people wanting to be around you in result. You should be grateful for that.”

You couldn’t help but stiffen at his words, letting out a small smile tug at your mouth in return. “That really means a lot, Venti. Thank you.”

You took a minute to sink in Venti’s words before you slowly turned to the person who you dreaded giving a compliment to right now— Kuni sat there perfectly. His head rested gently on his head as he leaned against the table with his elbow.

“You…” You stammered on your words, trying to look in your mind for something, anything, you could say that wouldn’t compromise your position. But you knew that despite everything, you liked him a lot. He did prove that he was into you a long time ago, you just didn’t want to admit it. “I like…uh…”

You were unsure how to respond. And Kuni knew that too, so he took the lead. “I think you’re the only person who’s brought me joy in more than just a platonic situation. Being around you is something special to me, I’d rather it not go to waste fighting.”

Your eyebrows furrowed, wanting to look agitated, but his words were so genuine that you were put on the spot. You felt tears brimming up in your eyes in return, trying to hold your eyes open to shun them away, only resulting in them returning tenfold.

You quickly stood up from your seat, bitterness running down like waterfalls. “Excuse me.” You murmured, before rushing off to an undisclosed room.

The rest of the table was silent after that, looking around at each other awkwardly. From what was supposed to be a comfortable exercise turned into something entirely worse than expected. Especially since they all had a feeling that it would go wrong with you sitting next to him.

Kuni groaned, his head hanging and his back pressed firmly against the chair. “Fuck,” He drawled, feeling his patience wear thing. “So fucking annoying.”

“Go after them.” Thoma said amongst the quiet, a warm smile on his face. He knew that even though he wanted to go himself, there was someone who was planning to be with you for a very long time. “You’re good. We’ll all be here when you come back.”

Kuni hesitated, to which Kazuha smiled and nodded. “You said you had Mario Kart, right? We can just play that if you don’t mind.”

“Oh, fuck yeah!” Hu Tao was one of the first people to stand up, shooing Kuni off with her manicured hand. “Go. Bye! We’re going trashing on your expensive equipment for three hours.”

No matter how much he wanted to kick everyone out, he was given a small reminder as to how they’re the main reason why you haven’t given up on him. Unfortunately. So he didn’t say anything, leaving towards his bedroom, the same room he heard you lightly sobbing in.

The room both of you found yourselves in were dimly lit and a complete contrast from the kitchen. It was quiet, but the quiet here was different and heavy and thick— almost suffocating him. You sank down into a plush armchair sat in the corner of his room, sitting in silence with yourself until now.

You didn’t bother looking up to see who it was, you knew who it was. Kuni’s footsteps were light and soft enough to tell you that, he took the seat opposite you, leaning forward with his elbows on his knees. You were forced to look at him.

He looked beautiful from up close, his features naturally pairing together with the rest of his face. His jawline a perfect structure, his eyes soft enough for you to stare into his violet pools. His hair light and feathery, strands of it sticking in small clusters.

“Tell me what’s going on.” He sat back, mustering up a mix of concern and patience on his face. “I already told you I’m not going to fight with you anymore.”

You wiped your eyes candidly, the back of your hand leaving residue of your tears. A hiccup broke your speech, “That’s the problem, isn’t it?” Your wetted eyelashes brushed against your cheeks as your eyes squeezed shut. “You’re too patient now.”

“Didn’t learn it in a night.” He absorbed your words like they were all that he was able to get in that moment. “I mean, I still have no idea why you came around even this quick. You don’t have a reason to stay by my side as much as I do for you.”

“Oh, of course. Because it’s always different for you. You’re still trying, just like you did when you hated me, it’s confusing. You’re so…fucking confusing.” You looked up again, meeting his eyes with defeat. He was going to be in your life whether it was a friend or a lover, and with the more days that pass with him in it, you start to feel yourself teeter back and forth. “You’re not going to give up, are you?” Your voice was weak.

His eyes never left your face, tentatively taking your hand in his. “I had to get used to the idea of potentially never seeing or talking to you again when I left.” He paused, sincerity striking his face, more of an intense look than usual. “I never want to go through that again so long as I owe it to you. It’s cowardice, and I’d rather face you myself.”

“When will you not owe it to me?” Your heart was hurting, beating faster than it could ever. “I never wanted you to be indebted to me, you did that because you felt guilty, so just squash it already.”

At every second he stayed quiet, the brighter it dawned on you his intentions. He wanted to be by your side as long as possible. “Then it’s all done,” You stared at the hand holding yours, his warmth and steady hands with his skin slightly bulging with his veins, a black ring on his middle finger. “No more games. No more pretenses,” He said calmly. “I want you. More than I wanted anything.”

“Yeah.” You said slowly, a sense of cautious hope blooming in your chest. “I think I kind of do too.”

Swallowing hard, you tried to gather your own sense of resolve here. But all that you were able to even think about was how close he was to you…and the fact that you wanted to suck his face off.

The silence this time was a comforting one, understanding of each other that was unspoken for. He leaned in close to your face, the heat of his breath slowly lingering on your skin, making you ache in a passion you’ve never felt before even when Childe was trying to pursue you.

“Can I?” He whispered.

The breath you had was swept away by his tantalizing voice, nodding slowly at his request. It wasn’t like the last time where the anger and frustration was taken out on the love they pressed into the kiss. No, this one felt a lot better than you ever would have imagined.

The kiss that followed with your words was fluffy at first, the meeting of lips that quickly grew deeper as the months and months of progress they put into their entire history together was no longer at its standstill anymore. His hands snaked across your body, also with an aching desire nestled in his chest.

He tasted amazing on your lips, and you pressed yourself against him in a swift movement, swapping seats gradually. You were dazed, if your eyes could have hearts in them, they would have already.

You didn’t recoil, or protest, or fight him every step of the way anymore. Your tongues danced together in a passionate tango, its foreign-like actions to you making your eyes bleary with love. You were melting into him, no matter how much you didn’t want to give him that satisfaction.

It looks like you have a lot more to explain to your fans than expected.

previous ♡ masterlist ♡ next

YOU ARE on your way to being one of the hottest streamer in your nation at the moment, racking a monthly average of 10 million viewers, but something specific bothers you about it. you know that a lot of people hate you, but there's this one account. one account that's been following you since the early days of your career. they leave a flood of rude comments in your stream, your moderators banned each account they made, but they keep making more. you are at the end of your tether. but you are yet to find out that this persistent cockroach is none other than your friend's friend (and the only other streamer that's bigger than you), scaramouche.

taglist ♡ @thystarsshine @veekoko @gumickajolli @simonisferal @kamiboo

@justpeachyteastea @feiherp @pinkismyfavcolor @aether-darling @kunisnaomi

@keiiqq @mine-lu @featuredtofu @danhenglovebot @k4zushi

@kyon-cherri @b4tm4nn @iiinaurate @quacking-simp @auroratumbles

@kookiibun @ulquiorraswife @amvpk01 @simplysm1le @h3xi2g0n3

@alatusorrow @scaranthropy @mellowberrie @magica-ren @vernith

@kabukipookie @bananasquash @suqarlaced @dellalyra @lightyagamifan

@yourfavoritefreakyhan @heartsforseo @yomishen @pwushizz @swivy123

@strxwberryfetish @ibyobi @ashfrommars4 @chemiru @ainnofinway

@agaygothicmushroom @levianamor @dragontammerz @wth121 @lylovw

@morgyyyyyyy @lovemari @suniika @littlesliceofcheese @yumejo89

@liuaneee @franaby @tiddieshakeshownu @mimi3lover @kavineyah

@kittywagun (bold users means i'm having trouble tagging you)

#zoropookie #hhab #scaramouche x reader #genshin scaramouche #genshin #genshin smau #genshin impact #genshin x reader #genshin fanfic #genshin x you #genshin x yn #scaramouche x yn #scaramouche x you

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cherriesformatt · 3 days

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birds of a feather || matt sturniolo

matt x fem!reader

summary: reader is having a hard time but she knows she can come back to her safe place every time

warnings: none just fluff and bit of sadness

word count: 1,3k

a/n: hope you like it kinda put my heart in it

🍒

Have you ever just thought that you are done? Like you can't deal with shit anymore and there is nothing that will give you motivation? I felt like this for a long time until I met Matt. Matt started to just be there for me. First as a friend then as a partner. We met in high school when both of us started ditching class because we didn't feel comfortable in school. We would just give each other weird glances and walk different ways until our paths met in the park. We would spent hours hanging out by the Fresh Pond. We talked and had lunch together few times a week. I was waiting for this time because I wasn't able to talk to anyone like I could talk to Matt and I knew he understood me.

I didn't realize I loved him until he came to my house to say goodbye when he and his brothers were moving to LA. I wasn't mad at him, he was chasing his dreams with two most important people for him. They were already successful on YouTube by that time so I understood they wanted more. I was proud of him but I was also dying inside. I didn't want to tell him about my feelings also knowing he broke up with his girlfriend to only focus on their career.

As it turned out not only I realized the strong feeling for one another. But it took us months to confess to each other. I was scared to move away from home but I knew I could do everything for him. So I did. I took everything I had and moved to LA. Got shitty apartment, part-time job and started attending Uni.

Here we are now. Two years in. I had a shitty job, better apartment and best boyfriend and my best friend by my side.

"Ur do wrong about it" I rolled my eyes putting pieces of legos together.

"No, I am not" He said trying to figure out how to connect pieces.

"I do not understand what in your head tells you not to use instructions" I said looking down at him. He was laying down on the blanket while I was sitting cross-legged next to him.

We were in the park near his house on a little lego date. We just came back from Boston few days ago and since that I didn't see him. I was busy with going back to work life after vacation and he as well had stuff going on. And today was a day we finally were alone. Because all of Boston trip we were with friends, his family or my family or I was alone because he had a boys trip. It has been a long time since we could just spend day together and I missed just talking to him.

"Because I know I can do it by myself" He said and I just shook my head and put my finished piece on the blanket.

"Here I am done mr.I can do it by myself" I smiled showing off my lego Pokemon.

"Oh shut up will you?" He laughed and took the instructions. Because of course I was right.

I laid down so my head would rest on his legs. I watched the sky.

"I need to quit my job" I said first time out loud what was on my mind.

'Well...I told you that already, you're not happy there and I know you could to so much better than that or just noting and stay with me?" He looked at me and started to play with my hair putting legos away.

"Matt... you know I do not want you to be my sugar daddy we already talked about this. This is not an option for me. And yes I know you told me that but.. I do not know I feel like my boss is even worst after I took my time off." I said.

"Did something happened?" He asked me clearly concerned.

"Nothing major, you know how I only usually did computer job and prepared meetings for others and for him. Well... he made me be a leader of the meeting...I had a stomach ache for the rest of the day and throw up when I got home because I was so anxious but in the same time I did it and it went well" I said and took a deep breath.

"Why you didn't say anything?" He asked me softly squeezing my hand.

"You were streaming and I didn't want to interrupt" I said.

"I would pick up the phone anyway, you know that.. And about this... he is an asshole but honey... I am so proud of you for doing that I know how hard it must have been for you. Remember my first tour show? I thought I couldn't do it. But you knew I could. And I also know you can do more than this job y/n." He said looking at me and smiled.

"You think?" I asked.

"I know. You have a brilliant ideas and all the time someone else is taking credits for them because you are to kind and you give them away for others to present. Sweets I know you could do that yourself and take all the credits. Of course few first times will be hard but then it will get better and I know you can do it...You deserve so much better than what you are doing now..." He said and I smiled.

"Thank you..." I said and I leaned to peck his lips.

"You do not have to thank me...I will always believe in you" He hugged me.

We talked more until sun was setting down and we came back brining dinner home for everyone.

"Hello! did you miss me already?" I said walking into the leaving room where Chris and Nick were doing something on their laptops.

" Not really I had my Pepsi all to myself for 4 days" Chris smiled at me and I smiled back.

"Yes we did, the only sane person in this household, hi" Nick waved at me and I smiled at him as well.

I was an only child and I was beyond happy that with Matt came two of his brothers, well three but Justin wasn't leaving with him. I felt like I had brothers my own thanks to that and I knew that they cared about me as much as I did for them.

We spend some time with them and then we went to Matt's room.

"I know you had a lot on your mind today so..." he walked to the nightstand and took out our journals.

I smiled and sat on his bed. He gave me mine and took his as well. I rested my back on the headboard and open my journal. I took one of the pens he put between us and just stared to write. I loved that we could just do this together in silence. I rested my head on his shoulder after some time.

"Matt... would you still love me if I was a worm?" I asked.

I moved away a little and sat on my knees so I could look at him.

"Yes? But you would have to forgive me if I squeeze you. You know how wiggly I am in bed when I sleep" He said deadly serious.

"You are so stupid I swear to god...." I laughed looking past him.

"Dear diary... he said he would still love me if I was a worm ❤️" I wrote and closed my journal and throw it across the bed.

He smiled at me and put his journal away as well and he pulled me so I would straddle his lap.

"Til I rot away, dead and buried...." We both said in the same time and I just laughed and kissed him resting my forehead on his.

#matt sturniolo #nick sturniolo #sturniolo triplets #chris sturniolo x reader #matt sturniolo x reader #sturniolo fanfic #christopher sturniolo #sturniolo x reader #chris sturniolo #Spotify

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sophrosynesworld · 3 days

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With all my love, pt. 3

Part 3 is finally here and *gasp* lore?!

Do you know how hard it is to escape your top 5 pro-hero ex-boyfriend? His voice plays on my radio during my commute. His image is plastered across the news in the lobby this morning before lunch—he’s acting irrationally again. He’s always been too much of a hothead.

His recent heroic deeds have garnered both admiration and scrutiny. My departure seems to have affected him, causing some of his harsher traits to resurface. I never anticipated that he would notice, let alone react like this.

"I don't care if he's a jerk. Dynamite is one of the best heroes of this generation," I overhear one of the news anchors saying. The radio in the small restaurant makes it hard to miss.

"Dynamite is one bad decision away from killing someone," the woman says, clearly frustrated with her cohost. "I don't even know if it would be on accident."

"He has saved more people this year than Deku. How is that not a hero?" the cohost argues back.

"He's also cost this city thousands of man-hours repairing the damage his blasts created."

I set my tablet down, trying to push their argument out of my head. The familiar chime of bells rings, drawing my gaze to the doorway.

A redhead stands there, his eyes scanning the restaurant until they find mine. His face softens as he makes his way over, pulling out a chair and sitting across from me.

"You look good today," he says warmly. "Changed your hair?"

"No, but I did change my relationship status." I roll my eyes at his attempt at small talk. I know my ex-boyfriend's best friend didn’t just call me up to chat.

He chuckles, a sound out of place given the tension. “Look, I know things have been rough for you.”

“Rough? That’s putting it mildly.”

He leans forward, elbows on the table. “I want to help. He’s worried about you, you know.”

I sigh, glancing at the drawing in front of me. “He wasn’t worried when I was crying myself to sleep.”

“I get it,” he says softly. “But he’s struggling too. The hero life isn’t as glamorous as it seems. You know that better than anyone.” My heart skips a beat at the reminder of my early retirement. “The constant pressure, the expectations... it’s taking a toll on him.”

I look up, meeting his eyes. They hold sincerity, a genuine concern I hadn’t expected. “What do you want from me?” I whisper.

“Talk to him. Just once. Hear him out. You both deserve that closure.”

I lean back, the weight of his words settling over me.

“Fine,” I say after a long pause. “I’ll talk to him. But this doesn’t mean anything beyond that.”

He nods, a small smile playing on his lips. “That’s all I’m asking. Thank you.”

He settles back into his chair and picks up the menu. "Why don't we order something?"

I nod, grateful for the change in topic. "Sure. I hear their ramen is amazing."

We browse the menu, tension easing as we focus on the food. The waitress comes by, and we place our orders—spicy miso ramen for me, tonkotsu ramen for him.

As we wait, the restaurant buzzes with lunchtime chatter. Clinking utensils, humming conversations, and occasional laughter create a comforting atmosphere. It feels almost normal, a brief break from the chaos.

“So,” he says, breaking the silence, “how’s work? Still drawing those amazing designs?”

I smile, appreciating his interest. “Yeah, hectic, but I’m managing. Deadlines are killer, though.” He laughs as our waitress places two bowls in front of us.

“I can imagine. But your work is worth it. You’ve got talent, always have.”

“Thanks,” I say, feeling more at ease. “How about you? How’s hero life?”

“It’s... a lot,” he admits, mouth full of food. He swallows. “But it’s worth it, knowing we’re making a difference." I hum in agreement, tasting my food. The flavorful broth dances across my tongue, making me do an unconscious happy dance.

"We really do miss you though," Kiri says, his voice trailing off as he scratches his neck. I feel a pang of remembrance. I've never stopped missing being a hero. I hate not being able to work with my best friends.

"I don't get a retirement package as a hero," I reply, forcing a smile to mask my heartache. But it's clear my facade fails as regret fills Kiri's eyes. Apologies spill from his lips, but I don't listen. Instead, I reach out and gently place my hand on his for a brief moment.

"Eijiro, I promise you I've moved on. I don't blame anyone for what happened," I assure him, pushing another smile onto my face. "I got over that a long time ago."

I withdraw my hand and continue to eat, the conversation flowing more easily after a few moments. We reminisce about our days at UA, share laughs about our coworkers, and for a while, it feels like old times.

By the time we finish, I feel lighter, the past weeks’ weight lifting slightly. It’s not a solution, but it’s a start.

“Thanks for meeting me,” he says as we stand to leave. “and for agreeing to talk to him.”

I nod, a sense of anticipation blooming. “We’ll see how it goes.”

As we step out into the city’s noise, I unblock his number from my phone and watch in horror as hundreds of missed messages flood my phone screen.

#my hero academia #my hero academy fanfiction #bak #mha bakugou #mha x reader #bnha #bakugou x reader #katsuki bakugo #bakugou katsuki #katsuki bakugou #kirishima eijirou #mha kirishima #bnha eijiro kirishima #katsuki bakugo x reader #bnha bakugou #mha #bakugo katsuki

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gravedigginbbydoll · 3 days

Text

An Extra Step

Eddie Munson x Bilingual! GN Reader

AN: Heyo! So, I was randomly inspired to write this little blurb. I'm sorry for being AWOL so much, grad school has been kicking my ass. I promise to update my current WIPs as soon as I can. Anyways, this is based on myself being bilingual :) In the blue text is when the other language is spoken. I kept it vague and not specific so that other people who may be bilingual or have English as a second language could relate.

CW: mentions of food, mentions of family, mentions of childhood, no gender mentioned, pet names, kissing, emotional, fluffy

It started as a tiny thing, a little nudge from deep within. It was a warm summer day in Hawkins, you and Eddie relaxing in the trailer. Wayne had given you two your own trailer (right next to him, of course), and you had a jar on the table, coins and dollar bills stacked up in it, determined to get your own place one day together. Preferably a house or apartment, but that was a worry for later. You and Eddie were lounging about, you perched at the kitchen while Eddie was sprawled out on the sofa, attempting to cool off. You leaned against the counter, reading a postcard you’d received from a family member. You giggled at the message they wrote, peaking Eddie’s interest. He smiled, turning to you, sitting up a bit.

“What’s so funny, babe?,” He asked, cocking his head in that golden retriever way, his eyes curious.

You bit your lip, unsure how to explain. “Uh well… my cousin wrote me a postcard,” You explained, shrugging.

Eddie walked over, looking over your shoulder at the note before he deflated a litte. “Oh. It’s not in English,” He stated, a bit disappointed.

You nodded, biting your lip, thinking. You explained the joke briefly, giggling while doing so, but Eddie’s eyebrows furrowed and you felt your heart sink a bit.

You never told Eddie, but sometimes you felt like you lost yourself little by little without your first language. Jokes translated incorrectly, you were unable to express certain things in English, and you felt like a part of yourself was dimmed. You wished Eddie could understand your family and even your own moments of frustration, when that little piece of you slipped out, only for him to look a bit confused.

You shook your head, smiling awkwardly, and putting up the letter. “Nevermind…It’s not as funny in English.” You put up the card, taking Eddie’s hand over to the couch. “C’mon. Let’s watch a movie.”

Eddie could see the pain in your eyes when he didn’t understand your native tongue. He felt his heart squeeze each time, cursing himself for not learning it the moment he learned you had another piece to your puzzle.

Which was what prompted the secret research.

Fuck, Eddie had never even studied for school exams this hard.

He started his search at the library, asking around and trying to see if there were any classes nearby. He learned there were some lessons and books around, though they had to be ordered and the meetings were three towns over. But anything to see you smile.

Eddie poured over the books, kept a secret journal with all his notes from the clubs he attended (which truly were just people who spoke the language getting together to talk and exchange snacks, some of the older ladies pinching Eddie’s cheeks and smiling over at him.).

He knew you were suspicious, consistently glancing over at him confused when he would show up from the meeting late in the night, lying to say it was extra work hours.

He poured over cassettes you had in your native tongue when you weren't home, learning the lyrics to your favorite songs.

Hell, he even began trying to think in the language. (Easier said than done, he had no idea how you balanced the two)

But it was all worth it for that night.

Eddie had taken the day off, gone to the international grocery store that was miles away, only to drive back, and begin prepping. He was making a meal he remembered you saying you missed, something near and dear to your heart and childhood. He knew it would take a bit of prep work and sweat, but Eddie was willing.

He grinned to himself, heart swelling with pride.

He couldn’t wait.

When you walked through the door that night, you felt your heart stop. Familiar smells that you hadn’t smelled in years floated through the kitchen, your heart racing. You heard Eddie singing along softly in the kitchen, your native tongue clumsy on his lips, but making your heart swell, your eyes water a bit.

“E-Eddie? What’s all this?,” You asked cautiously, eyebrows furrowed, eyes watering and blurring your vision.

“It’s your favorite…I figured you deserved a treat!,” He replied…in your language. It was clumsy, the pronunciation not perfect. But your breath caught nonetheless.

“You did all this…for me?,” You whispered, clutching tightly at your heart as tears rolled down your cheeks.

Eddie smiled softly, walking over, softly running a finger under your chin to look up at him. “Of course. I love you,” He whispered back, his voice thick with emotion.

Tears streamed down your face, vision blurred as you threw your arms around his neck, crying into his shoulder, your heart overflowing with emotions, your hands clutching at him. You whispered ‘I love you’ over and over, sobs racking your shoulders as Eddie held you, rubbing your back, kissing the top of your head. It meant the world to finally hear those words in your tongue and being able to whisper it back.

That night was filled with warm and full bellies, laughter and leading Eddie through pronunciation, learning of his secret little escapades (So that’s why he hadn’t been as hungry! Those little grandmas were stuffing him with food…) and showering Eddie with kisses.

Never in your life had you felt so seen and loved.

Eddie Munson was it for you.

#eddie munson #stranger things #eddie munson x reader #stranger things 4 #eddie munson fluff #eddie munson x you #eddie munson fanfic #eddie munson x immigrant #eddie munson x bilingual!reader #eddie munson x immigrant!reader #eddie munson x gn!reader #eddie munson imagine #eddie munson blurb

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ickbite · 3 days

Text

WEEPING ANGEL! — Megumi one-shot!

megumi fushiguro x weeping angel!reader

she/her pronouns used, misunderstood reader

Megumi knew he was screwed, his time was coming to an end and he didn’t know what he did to deserve it. His life has only been misfortune after misfortune; his dad was never involved in his life, and then tried to sell him to the Zen’in clan, then he got adopted (which was a plus!), but his adopted dad got sealed despite the fact that he was the strongest.

Even though everything was going fine with Megumi’s life in terms of family and friends (his sister came out of her coma, his dad was freed, his friends force him to play Mario Party every night), by himself was a different story.

He always heard you. You were always there. He never knew what exactly you were, or what exactly you looked like, he just grew aware of the angel statue that he found everywhere he went. You were beautiful; your color was gray, your wings were magnificent, but that’s all you were, a statue… or so he thought.

It started when he was fifteen with the introduction of his friend, Yuji. They were off walking to meet up with the second-years and in the distance Megumi spotted you, a statue whose hands covered her face, with curly hair covering the parts that aren’t visible. After that moment, you followed him everywhere and he was started to grow bothered. You were more than what you led on, he searched the internet for statues like you and they were never found, you’re unique. It grew to a point where he had to ask his Father-Mentor, Gojo.

Gojo sat him down and explained the story of the L/N clan, a family created of statue-like curses, “the L/N clan takes the role of a regular statue, but in actuality, they’re planning something, Megumi.”

“What if it’s just a statue? She’s covering her face every time I see her.”

“The L/N clan, have a powerful asset, they can transport you to a different time, you can be in the 1950s when you were just here two minutes before. As a defense so they can catch their prey off-guard, they turn into stone when they’re looked at, they cover their eyes to avoid looking at each other.”

After that talk, Megumi made sure to stare as long as he could, but you never grew closer until he least expected it. Gojo was just sealed and megumi was alone in Shibuya, trying to figure out how he could possibly unseal him.

“Fushiguro~~~”

His eyes widened as your sweet voice rung in his ears.

“What will you do Fushi?~~~”

He hurriedly turned towards you, you had a big smile on your now stone-face with your eyes closed, hair sprawled around you as you were not face-to-face with Megumi.

“Why now? Out of all days?” He sighed, he raised his hand to your face, cupping it slightly. “You’re cold… what are you exactly?”

After a moment of silence he remembered, turning his back but keeping a distance between them.

“You know what I am, pretty, and I know what you are,” your back touched megumis as you interlocked your hands with his.

He pulled his hands away, “It’s been three years and you still show up, why?”

Your hands found comfort in his hair, “because you’re soooo cute~~~ I couldn’t help myself, I had to follow you,” you pouted.

“Stop putting your hands on me, I don’t know you.”

“But you could! My name is Y/N,” your arms snaked around his neck, rubbing his chest ever so slightly. “You know what I am,” you whispered in his ear, giving it a slight bite.

“You’re in the L/N clan—“

“Puh-lease, we’re angels,” a devilish smirk spread on your face, “my people are sad, we weep and weep, we were excluded from the sorcerer world because of our… unique abilities.”

“You weep? Your people are killers, you send them back in time and feast on their energy.” Megumi’s messy hair fell in front of his eyes.

“We don’t do that to everyone, we do it to enemies who attack us first, the sorcerers hate us because we’re curses, they attack us and kill us. I bet you didn’t see anything about me besides the stone, my eyes are E/C.”

“E/C?” Megumi turned his body to face the girl, her eyes were open and now we really took the chance to look at her, she wasn’t bad looking, beautiful even.

“Megumi! We found a way to free Gojo! C’mon!” Nobara yelled from down the street, “we need you!”

Megumi turned his head towards Nobara to tell her he’s on his way, but when he turned back, you were gone. A sigh escaped him as he started his plan to see you un-stoned.

#megumi fushiguro #megumi x reader #jjk megumi #jujutsu megumi #jujutsu kaisen megumi #megumi fluff #megumi x you #toji fushiguro #fushiguro tsumiki #jujutsu gojo #jujutsu kaisen #gojo satoru #jjk gojo #gojo x reader

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picnokinesis · 2 days

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if you would be interested in sharing your thoughts about the star beast, i would love to hear them!!

Ooh okay, so - well, first, just to start off: I think The Star Beast is a really important episode, and was very much a needed episode. The current climate in the UK regarding the trans community and their rights is getting extremely rancid, to put it lightly. Having an episode of Doctor Who with an explicitly trans character, having the other characters around her be affirming and supportive - that was awesome. Extremely awesome. And I'm really glad that RTD is loudly putting himself on this side of the whole 'debate' (which isn't really a debate, because it's just straight up bigotry from the anti-trans side, and we need people like RTD outwardly speaking out against that bigotry).

When I talk to cis people offline about this episode, that is pretty much what I say and also where I stop.

I'll put the rest under the cut hahah - there's a bit of negativity here, just as a warning for all the hardcore RTD stans, but I think it's well-founded and not vitriolic at all, just like, miffed hahaha. Also, I know there were a few trans folks who found this episode really affirming, so just to be clear: this is just my opinion, personal thoughts, and also influenced by the conversations I had with other trans people that I know and care about about the episode.

When I talk to trans people - offline or online - about this episode, I go in a lot deeper, because whilst it was a very important episode, it was somewhat flawed. It also came off the back of several things RTD had said and done that really ticked me off, and so I wasn't really in the interest of being entirely uncritical about what, to me and a lot of trans dw fans that I spoke to, thought was a very "cis" trans story. And when I watched it, I thought 'oh geez, is this how poc feel when white people try and write poc stories with good intentions but don't really get it right??" because like. Ho boy.

The thing about this episode was that RTD wanted to write an affirming trans story, and mostly did that, but also, imo...doesn't actually understand what gender and transness actually is. I think my main gripes were definitely with the climax scene - the whole 'we can let go bc we're women' thing literally made me go 'what' out loud at the screen because...well, it's just gender essentialism. Trans inclusive, sure! But trans inclusive gender essentialism is still gender essentialism. Women aren't better than men. There's actually an exceptionally good essay written by a trans woman who was still in the closet about her experiences in queer spaces that had a very prevalent anti-men attitude, and I've seen it myself irl too. It's not helpful - it's harmful, in fact - and it leans on this strange mysticism about women that is fundamentally anti-feminist, in my opinion. Women aren't "innately better at emotional and intangible, instinctive things" (and it's unspoken counterpart - "thus men are better at logical, rational things" - is also untrue). Women aren't magically better at 'letting things go' than men are - I reckon you could make an argument about men being socialised to not be emotional, and that would be an interesting conversation to have, but that was not what was being said - especially with the Doctor being raised in a society that didn't even perceive gender in the same was as humanity.

Also, the thing that REALLY got me was 'if you were a woman, you'd get it' - first of all, no. Thirteen never let anything go in her life and repressed to the max, if anything she was WORSE than tenteen at that lmao. Second - and this is the more salient point - I think it's a strange thing to suggest that tenteen is fully a man, at this point? Like, regardless of what he looks like, regardless of how he identifies or how thirteen identified, he just lived a lifetime in a body that looked like a woman, and thus was treated as such by the rest of the universe. He wasn't going to forget all of that. I actually really liked how the Chibnall era approached thirteen's gender - or, rather, her complete ambivalence to it, where it seemed like gender was more of an annoying thing that kept happening to the doctor that she kept having to remember, rather than something she felt - however I really REALLY wish they'd actually dug explicitly into the transness of it all, and so when they didn't, I'd hoped that RTD would do that instead. Especially since we KNEW Yasmin Finney was in it and we knew we were going to get a trans character!! I was like, this is the PERFECT opportunity to get the Doctor to actually talk about their gender and how it, fundamentally, doesn't really change between bodies, just how people REACT to it changes. But instead, the episode seems to present the doctor as having flicked a binary switch - once woman, now man - and thus made sure to remind us that every time thirteen was mentioned, it was framed around the fact that she was The Woman Regeneration, but also that tenteen was Now a Man Again. And even if that WAS THE CASE, it still wouldn't mean that tenteen came out of that experience completely mindwiped of everything about 'womanhood', right?? Like he lived as a woman! He was a woman 45 minutes ago, but now you're telling him that he couldn't possibly understand anything about this because he's a man now? Like first of all, his physical body's characteristics have nowt to do with his ability to let things go, second, it's just....okay, it reminds me of the dichotomy between all these detransition horror stories the anti-trans folks like to spew out, versus when you talk to actual detransitioners, who are quite often gnc and extremely positive about the trans community, and whose experience within that community and transitioning impacted how they view the world.

And I think it fundamentally comes down to RTD not really understanding either womanhood or transness. He actively speaks out on both of these things, which is great, but I don't think he understands them fully. I think the fact that he didn't think that David Tennant could wear a t-shirt, braces, trousers and coat because they were "women's clothes", and that when he cast David Tennant that was one of the first things he immediately decided is kind of telling.

There's also the whole 'male-presenting timelord' thing, which, again, I just don't think RTD really understood what that meant, like I'm not sure what his point was there, genuinely. Like, on a technical level it's acknowledging that the Doctor isn't necessarily male, just looks like a man (correct) buuuuuuuuuut the full line was saying 'you'd never understand this because you're a man' SO LIKE...okay? So he's not actually a man, but actually because of his male-adjacency, he's incapable of coming to the same conclusion that a woman did? So he's still...defined by his maleness? Hm. Strange sentence to write coming out of a trans woman's mouth.

What would have been better? I wish they'd just had Donna and Rose say 'because we're human', or maybe 'because we're the Nobles'. I also know a lot of people really didn't like the misgendering scene with the kids on the bikes - I think my personal feelings on that are a little more complicated, as a trans person who is not out irl and functionally uses my birthname almost everywhere, but also isn't triggered by it. It's not a deadname, more like a paperwork name rather than my preferred name, right? But I know for a lot of trans people, deadnaming is like psychological warfare and it's really awful, especially when done with malicious intent (like shown in the scene with the boys on the bikes). However...I do understand why RTD included this scene, and actually kind of agree with him. Because the boys on the bikes are the sort of people who are also watching the show. And so then seeing that kind of thing being condemned by the narrative by a key, beloved character, is probably something that's actually helpful. On the other hand though...in the Doctor Who Unleashed (or whatever the behind the scenes thing is called now), you've got this interview with Yasmin Finney saying that it was actually a pretty triggering scene to film for her and genuinely affected her, and I'm like....okaaaaaay then I REALLY hope they had someone she could talk to on set. Like, fundamentally, I think telling these stories are important, but, yknow, not at the expense of the actual actress' mental wellbeing, right? So that concerned me a bit.

I also think that the scene between Sylvia and Donna in the kitchen talking about Rose was brilliant. And this is because it was about cis people trying to understand and support trans people whilst not completely getting it and making mistakes, but also trying their best!! Which RTD does understand, very well!! And it felt so real. It was fantastic. There's also the part with the whole 'did you assume the meep's pronouns' whiiiiiiiich I have mixed feelings about? I think here, RTD was trying to poke fun at the people who do say that sort of thing to make fun of trans people, and having the Doctor be like 'actually this is a good point we should be checking this sort of thing'......however. I don't think I've ever heard 'did you assume my pronouns' come out of a trans person's mouth. It's always been a cis person mocking our community. So it felt a bit...incongruent. And all that needed to be changed was having Rose say 'how do you know the meep is a he?' - like that was all it needed!!! Also, it was a shame that after the delightful moment of the doctor being like 'SAME HAT' regarding the meep's pronouns, that.....we then had NO OTHER DISCUSSION about the doctor's gender!! Like, Russel, dude, you're really gonna have Rose hear the 'male-presenting' guy say 'oh yeah I do that with pronouns too!! :D' - have her NOT REACT TO THAT AT ALL - and then you're gonna have her say by the end 'oh you don't understand bc you're a man :)' after her non-binary power move moment? Sighs. Yeah.

I think another important thing to remember here is that there were no trans folks in the writer's room on this. Now, this is a tricky one because I think people who aren't part of a certain community should be writing stories outside their own knowledge and experience, and should be encouraged to do so!! I don't think that you need to have everything rubberstamped, and even something written by someone in a certain community isn't going to resonate with everyone in that community. Actually, I think it's unhelpful to start getting into the politics of 'who is allowed to write what' - I think anything written with care and good intention is valuable, especially if the writer is willing to listen to constructive criticism and learn from any mistakes that are made. But I think, as a writer myself, if you are going to write a story about that community, it might be worth 1) talking to them a bit more than I think RTD did - but, to be fair, I don't actually know how much research he did, but, well, see above on the fact I don't think he really got what he was writing about - but also 2) not dismissing writers from that community (and others!), which RTD did in an interview not thaaaaaaat long before the episode aired. Again, to be fair to him, he has since then been like 'oh, we need to mentor and encourage the new generation of trans writers and writers of colour', which, great! But also, sir, then why were you saying that all the scripts you got from minority writers were all awful, angry, and lacked any love for tv like skksks SIR. SIR. The thing that gets me about that comment in particular is that, as someone currently starting out in script writing, I know exactly how hard it is to get at all noticed. It takes a lot of effort, a lot of passion, a lot of hard work and a lot of skill - and a lot of luck too, granted, but not luck along. So, RTD, if these writers got their scripts to your literal desk, as showrunner of Doctor Who...I think they have some love and passion. They HAVE to, to get to the point where he is reading those scripts. Also maybe RTD should unpack the fact that he thought the scripts were bad because they were too angry - I mean, I haven't read them, so I don't know, but maybe, sir, feeling uncomfortable about the anger in a script isn't a bad thing. Not every story is meant to be an easy pill to swallow. There are aromantic stories I want to write about romance as horror, romance as a virus, romance as a destructive force, that I think a lot of alloromantic people will find uncomfortable. Does that mean they're bad? Maybe, lol. Mostly they're bad because they're not written yet lmao, but I don't think the anger and discomfort in them makes them inherently weak. In fact, I think often anger can make a story stronger.

So then, I think The Star Beast left a sour taste in the back of my mouth, despite all the positive aspects of it, because of that. I think that comment also kinda left me frustrated about Dot and Bubble, even though I think that was a fantastic episode and genuinely really well done, and very effective - and I'm genuinely loathe to criticise it at all because I think it was so important - but. Having RTD talking in an interview about wondering how long the audience will take to notice that the cast is all white (and, thus, the depicted society is racist) whilst sitting in a writers room that's all white iiiiiiiiiiis uh. I don't think he thought about that SKKS. I think a lot about Sacha Dhawan talking about how you can be as inclusive on screen as you like, but if it's all 'white behind the lights' then how much does that inclusivity actually mean?

RTD definitely had good intentions and wrote a mostly good story. But he definitely fell down in some regards, aaaaaand well. I don't know. My personal opinion is that he's kind of arrogant and thinks he's infallible as a writer (and I may feel this way bc of the way parts of the fandom seem to put him on a pedestal, if I'm honest) - but I think that he's just human. He doesn't get things perfectly right all the time, and that's absolutely fine, but I think it's interesting and important to discuss those pitfalls, and I just wish he'd stop making it feel like he thinks he can write trans stories better than, yknow, actual trans people, and then write the most cis trans story I've ever seen SKSKSKSK

(AND ACTUALLY - sorry, this is getting long, but it's kind of indicative of the whole industry at the moment? The industry is calling for more diverse voices, more diverse stories - but they also want stories that can appeal to the widest possible audience, the common denominator, and thus "trans stories by trans people for trans people" doesn't actually tick that box. This didn't hit me until I wrote a trans horror script that got shortlisted for a script call, but when I spoke to the (cis) producer and director (who were LOVELY, the producer had a gorgeous dog called Biscuit HAHA) I very quickly realised that they did not get it. They didn't understand. "Why do we have to kill the mirror demon that's the girl part of this trans man?" they asked. "She should get to live too!" But: "She was never a part of him," I had to say. "She was the idea of him that everyone around him thought he was, and thought it so strongly that she became real. It was her or him." They didn't really understand, but on the plus side it did highlight to me what was unclear in my script that none of my (trans) proof readers had picked up on (although my transfemme friend made the HILARIOUS comment that maybe the mirror demon could go and find a nice trans girl to possess? WHICH SKSKSKSKKSKSK I MEAN -))

Anyway. -gestures nebulously- I feel like my thoughts were a lot more concise and well constructed in the week after this episode actually aired hahaha, but I didn't want to throw my hat into the ring back then. I did find it amused how the majority of my cis trans-affirming friends were like 'GREAT EPISODE, RIGHT?!!' and the majority of my trans friends were sending me the grimace emoji in the week after the episode aired LMAO

#taka replies #anon #ohhhhhh i should not tag this for the main tag but i'm gonna do it anyway because I want it filed correctly on my blog RIP #doctor who #i've not proofread this so apologies for any mistakes #gender #lgbt+#trans

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ur-loser-gf · 2 days

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My intro!!!!!!!

hewo!!! im ur loser gf who asks way too many stupid questions:3

(i looked up online where a place like this is and tumblr showed up! im new to it but i did my research and i do hope i can make a new home here:) i heard thats lots of young girls go here to get attention so im sorry if im not welcome!

also imSOO sorry my into is so long im new to this! i tried to make it pretty though!

me - 🌸

this account - 🌺

rules - 🌹

Me!

🌸 name: worthless excuses like me don’t get names:(

🌸 age: biologically 18 but i haven’t been keeping track and i’m stupider than a 9 year old >~<

🌸 location: im from the west but i belong in my room where no one can see me!

🌸 pronouns/gender: im female but im not good enough to be an actual woman, stupid things like me don’t have genders, so it/it’s pronouns are fitting and the best for me!:)

🌸 my sexuality: i don’t deserve to be with anyone but im open to anyone of any gender!

🌸 my physical description:

- blondish brown hair

- blue eyes (not the pretty kind, the dead kind)

- white and extremely pale coz i never go outside

- a bit chubby (130 pounds last time i checked) but im on a diet and doing my best to lose weight (tho im still and always will be gross)

- im also 5’5

- i have big boobs but i hate them

- idk how big my ass is but nothing special

- my thighs are pretty thick but not in a good way

🌸 my mental description

- im really stupid and rightfully hate myself for it

- im psychotic, i have anger issues, and borderline personality disorder

- im super obsessive and the more i like someone the more i let them do whatever they want to me

- but also it can be difficult to earn my trust (think of me like a bunny, weak, fragile, and frightened, only im not cute)

- i have an ed and i sh but i don’t like starving anymore because im incredibly malnourished, i also don’t have a way to cut :(

- i have no friends (wonder why lmao) but when i was younger older men online would always be so kind to me! so now i kinda depend on them:P

- i hate me and everyone else (you) should also!

This Account!

🌺 this accounts purpose: this blog is self harm first and lust second! most stuff doesn’t turn me on and i just use it as a way to hurt myself (by either making me uncomfortable or it hurting my feelings, etc)

🌺 purple text: self harm, vents, or anything along that nature that doesn’t involve my lust:)

🌺 pink text: me horny posting, meaning it’s something that actually does turn me on!

🌺all activity is welcome: dms, asks, anons are and always will be open to anything! go off and do whatever you want! just don’t break the rules hehe! but unsolicited dick pics and stuff like that are okay!

🌺 my interests on this account: im open to all kinks! this is just because while i have personal kinks, what i want doesn’t matter and my pain is good! so i have no sexual limits besides maybe a serious form of pain that hurts *other people* that isn’t me, like a misogyny kink for example, im not okay with, only because im not the only one hurt by misogyny! i don’t want anyone else to hurt:( only me, only i deserve to hurt.

🌺 my activity: im active the most after 7 pm, i gotta try n act like im sane, normal, human, and like a girl or else i’ll be found out! (well i rarely go out or talk to ppl but just in case.. im like batman teehee) and i log off at 10 pm (est)

🌺 when i post: because i have soo many thoughts and really don’t wanna spam and bother people:( and because i love schedule and rly like the scheduling/drafting system on tumblr, i put my thoughts into drafts n when im ready (brave enough) i schedule them for a specific time!:) every 30 minutes starting at 7 pm and ending at 10 pm (est) there should be a new post!:D so if im ever inactive but somehow still posting that’s why:)

Rules!

🌹 Ima have to put on a serious face for this but i feel i need to now because im generally bad at boundaries. absolutely NO rule breaking, under any circumstances. i am the holder of this account and i will block you if i deem it absolutely necessary. i don’t have many rules but im EXTREMELY strict when it comes to them (and i’ve tried but there’s no way i’ll be getting rid of them) so best case scenario, rule breakers will only receive a block, thank you for those who abide by the rules i love you:)

🌹 no racism, transphobia, homophobia, xenophobia, or sexism of any kind on my blog, this is a safe place for everyone. an extremely important thing to note is that i hate myself, degrade myself, hurt myself, let others use me, etc *not* because i’m female, but because of who i am as a creature. my sex and gender have nothing to do with it. please respect that simple fact.

🌹i don’t send. i can imagine that if i were to get close to someone i’ll send them any pictures they want (it’s certainly a possibility but it’s hard to gain my trust). so regardless of your reasons, i will not be posting or sending any pictures of myself that include my face or nudity. my body belongs to my future lover (deity) anyway.

🌹i don’t give out other socials. this one is simple, if i want to i’ll give you my discord but it’s highly rare so please don’t ask:)

🌹NO KIDS NO EXCEPTIONS. anyone under 18 is not welcome here it isn’t good for you, it isn’t even good for me.

🌹if you get triggered by any dark topics (drugs, rape, pedophilia, grooming, ed’s, sh, or anything really) please block me, the idea of hurting someone because of this account hurts me genuinely:(

🌹i will likely add more rules in the future but i’ll make sure to blog about it!

🌹 sorry for all the strictness n stuff i don’t like being firm or anything like that but i believe it’s necessary unless i get so overwhelmed and end up deleting my account within days:(

i’ll likely revise my intro in the future!:) please give me tips on how to make it or me better if you have any!<3

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medusapelagia · 2 days

Text

Seeds of Dreams, Seeds of Truth 4\11

Rating: Mature Relationship: Steve Harrington/Eddie Munson Tags: Alternate Universe - Medieval, Alternate Universe - Magic, Regent Prince/King Steve Harrington, Knight Eddie Munson, Prison, Sick Steve Harrington, Vomiting, Attempted Murder, Poisoning, Double povs, Panic Attacks, Magic,

Read it here or on AO3

Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4, l Part 5, (soon Part 6, Part 7, Part 8, Part 9, Part 10, Part 11)

WC: 2023

When Steve comes back to his senses the first thing he notices is the smell, the familiar mix of sweat and metal that always follows Eddie around.

“Ed?” he calls, confused and not daring to open his eyes after all those awful dreams that he had, but a warm hand closes around his hand.

“Hi, Stevie.” The familiar voice replies and finally Steve finds the courage to open his eyes and meet the big dark pools he loves so much.

The Regent Prince lifts an arm, caressing Eddie’s face, doubtful. “Is this… is this real?” he whispers, not daring to hope that he is finally free: there are no prison bars, no little sky square to look at, no moldy blankets or cold floor. He is lying in a bed, maybe not as comfortable as his royal one but still way better than the cold stones he slept on in the last few nights.

“This is real. I’m real, Steve.” The knight replies with a sad smile, kissing his knuckles, and Steve feels a pain in his soul seeing how sad his lover is. He tries to lift himself, failing miserably, and needs Eddie’s help to sit up in the bed.

“Are you ok? What happened after the coronation? Are you hurt? And the others? Where are they? Gareth? Have you seen Gareth? And those in the castle? Are they safe? I saw Joyce once and she told me that people were disappearing!” Steve shoots one question after another without even taking a breath. His heart beats so fast with worry that it feels like it’s going to jump out of his chest. Eddie puts a hand on his shoulder, with a little pressure to ground him while he keeps talking to him in a soothing voice, trying to calm him down.

“I’m fine. Gar is fine. We are ok. Just try to take a deep breath. For me. Come on… Just one… Close your eyes and follow my voice.” Eddie insists, and Steve closes his eyes, letting the voice of his lover guide him. “Deep breath in… and out. Again. In… and out.”

Slowly, one breath at a time, Steve regains his composure. “I’m sorry…” he whispers, lowering his eyes, but Eddie lifts his chin.

“You have nothing to be sorry about. You are worried for your people, and that’s exactly what great kings do. I'm so proud of you, Steve. You handled a horrible situation so well. Thanks to you no one was injured during the coronation, I promise. We stayed back, as you ordered, even if it broke my heart let them take you away from me.” Eddie confesses, brushing away some hair from Steve’s face. “I would like to ask you to promise me you’ll never give me an order like that again in your life, but I know it’s not something I can ask from you.” He says, but when Steve lowers his eyes Eddie pinches his chin and makes him stare into his eyes. “You are a great king and you care about your people and I respect you for that.”

Steve tries to turn away from Eddie but his tight grip doesn’t let him go, and when their eyes meet again he finally confesses, “I’m sorry that I ordered you to stay back, but I don’t want to imagine what would have happened if I wouldn’t have given you that order…”

Eddie nods in silence; if Steve hadn’t ordered his guard to stay back, the Sacred House’s floor would have been tainted with blood and it would have been the beginning of a civil war. Neither of them would want that for their people.

Steve coughs and Eddie is quick to offer him some water. When he regains his breath the prince turns toward his personal guard. “How did you make me escape?”

Eddie smirks. “You know me, Stevie, I have my ways. It wasn’t hard to blend in with the other guards and let myself in, I know the castle better than anyone. We have spent years playing hide and seek, finding secret passages, and running from one side of the castle to the other unnoticed. It was good training.” Eddie replies with a wink, helping Steve to lie back. “Joyce helped us. She put some sleeping drug in the guards’ rations and we got in and out. A piece of cake.” Eddie winks, but somehow Steve doubts that it was so easy.

“My father will be furious; you know his temper. We have to get back before something awful happens.” Steve begs, but Eddie shakes his head.

“It’s not him you have to worry about, Steve, but you��!” Eddie replies, looking concerned. “When I saw you in the dungeons for a moment I thought… I thought… Fuck! I’m sorry, Steve! I’m so sorry I didn’t come to get you as soon as they took you away. Please forgive me.” He begs, holding Steve’s hand and kissing his knuckles.

Steve shakes his head, softly, “There is nothing to forgive. I trust you with my life and you have nothing to be sorry about. I just wished you didn't have to risk your life to save mine.”

“You are our rightful king, my life and my soul belong to you.” Eddie declares, lowering his face and kissing Steve's lips. It’s just a peck, sweet and soft, but it’s all Steve needed.

“Where are we?” he asks, turning around to look at the little room that has nothing to do with his castle.

Eddie scratches his head in embarrassment, “Do you remember the stories… those about the mages that live at the end of the woods? Well, they aren’t stories at all. There is a little house at the end of the woods that is protected by many enchantments, only those in need might find it. And… Well. We were in need. So here we are.” He explains quickly, lifting his hands.

“What? How?” Steve blinks a few times, trying to clear his mind. “Are you telling me… are you telling me that stories are real? That there are mages here?”

Steve’s nanny has told him many stories about mages, enchantments and dark forces, and how his predecessor fought bravely and freed the kingdom, but that’s all the were: stories.

Eddie nods seriously. “There are and they saved your life.” He explains, “Your father was poisoning you. If we would have waited another day to rescue you… well, let’s say that I don’t think that there would have been anything to rescue.” Eddie replies harshly, biting his cheek.

“That’s not possible.” Steve protests, “My father is a stern man, but he is not cruel. I’m sure he was just holding me in prison before a regular trial.”

“Steve, he put you in a cell without even talking to you. Do you really think he was going to give you a fair trial?.”

Steve lowers his eyes. He knows that Eddie is right but he can’t believe that his own father tried to kill him. “Why would he? I’m his only son.”

“You are, but you ruled for the last three years and there are people ready to fight for you. I think that killing you was the easiest way to … to…”

“To get rid of you.” A tall blond woman says.

Steve turns his head toward the tall woman: she’s dressed in black and has numerous crystals around her neck, but what betrays her origins are her eyes: they are as green as the spring grass, with little golden flakes that shine in an unhuman way even in the dim light. He has never seen a mage in his life but if the stories are true, as they seem they are, mages have traces of old blood in their veins.

Steve is still staring at the mage when a cute little blond girl, holding a tray with a bowl of hot soup, comes into the room. She has the same golden flakes in her blue eyes, and her ears are softly pointed on the top.

“You are awake. That’s good news.” She says smiling brightly, her eyes so blue that Steve could swear that he hears seagulls when he looks her in the eye.

“Who are you?” Steve asks, surprised.

“That’s no one of your business,” the tall woman replies abruptly, and when Steve turns his head he sees that she is standing right in front of him.

“Those are the mages that saved your life.” Eddie explains, “But they are very jealous of their privacy. They gave us shelter but won’t tell us their names.”

“There is power in names, a power that your people forgot. You gave them away too quickly.” The woman says, “But if you want a word in common language to identify us, I’m Robin, and she is Chrissy.”

Eddie frowns. “I tried to get a name out of you for days and you never told me!” he complains, but the woman winks.

“You didn’t ask nicely.” She replies, ,moving closer to Steve, grabbing his chin with no gentleness, and staring into his eyes. “Uhm… your eyes look almost clear. Did he throw up again?” she asks Eddie, who shakes his head.

“No. He had some seizures during the night and sweated a lot like you said he would have, but no more black goo stuff.”

The woman nods, pleased. “Good. That’s good. You are stronger than you look, princeling.” She declares while Steve observes her, his confusion written in big letters on his face. “Open your mouth.” She orders, getting a vial with some green liquid that smells disgusting and Steve’s mouth remains stubbornly closed. “I’ll give you an easy choice: do you want to live? If the answer is yes, open your mouth.”

The taste is even worse than the smell, but the woman is quick to close Steve’s mouth with her hands and make him gulp down everything.

A couple of tears escape from Steve’s eyes, and at that moment the girl removes her hands. “That’s called Crocodile Tears , can you guess why?” she asks amused, then offers him some water, which Steve swallows to wash away the terrible taste from his mouth.

Eddie grabs Steve’s hand, holding it to his chest. “But he’ll be fine, right? You gave him the potion and…”

“Yes. He will survive.” She responds, taking her vials and disappearing again, while the cute blond girl remains in the room.

Steve’s head turns to follow the jingling of the numerous crystals and almost doesn’t notice that the other girl is still in the room.

“Don’t judge her too harshly.” She says in a whisper. “She lost her family during the purge.”

Steve frowns, confused, “The purge was ages ago.”

“I know. But some of us are blessed with a long life. If you can call it a blessing. Someone would call it a curse.” The girl murmurs, almost to herself, but when she turns toward Steve she is gleaming, “I’m glad you are feeling better, your Majesty.” She says, making a little bow that would have had Steve’s father horrified by its sloppiness, but that in Steve’s eyes looks so sweet.

“Thank you for saving my life.”

She chuckles, hiding her beautiful smile behind her hands, “It was an honor.”

Steve turns toward Eddie, looking for answers, but his personal guard seems as puzzled as he is.

“Eat as much as you can,” she points at the tray, “you’ll need your strength back.” She says, before leaving the room.

Eddie helps him eat the soup, feeding him spoon after spoon like he was a baby. Steve tries to complain, but from the way Eddie’s hands shake while holding the spoon he understands that Eddie needs this more than him. So he relaxes and lets Eddie feed him, until his eyes start to close again.

“No more?” Eddie asks, taking away the bowl.

“Sorry…” Steve whispers in a drowsy voice.

“You don’t have anything to be sorry for.” Eddie replies, tucking the blankets in around him and kissing his forehead. “Don’t worry your pretty head. All you need to do is rest.”

tag list: @katyawriteswhump

#medusapelagia fanfic #medusapelagia #my fanfic #Steve Harrington #Eddie Munson #Steddie #Steve x Eddie #Stranger Things Fanfiction #Steddie Fic #Steddie Summer Exchange #Seeds of Dreams Seed of Truth

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xclowniex · 2 days

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How is people pointing out the atrocities committed by the IDF/IOF whatever the hell they are immediately labeled “allies of Hamas” when ya’ll constantly always use the whole “you can disagree with the actions of others” excuse to justify why Israel does whatever they do

Please point out where I have ever said that. It's honestly pretty tiring getting asks where people try to put words in my mouth that I have never said.

What you can find on many posts on my blog is me saying that I myself do not agree with the actions of the Israeli Government or the IDF and that you can criticize the Israeli government and IDF without being antisemitic which a lot of people fail at doing.

A lot of "criticisms" come from modern day blood libel where people will straight up say an antisemitic trope and swap out jew for zionists or Israel and that is not okay. Changing jew to zionists or Israel or anything similar does not remove the fact that it's still an antisemitic trope being used towards either half of the world's jews (as half live in Israel) or towards 80% of jews (as 80% of jews believe in some form of zionism, the most popular form amongst jews is a peaceful two state solution)

Another from of antisemitism which is masked as "criticism" is when people will only say something is bad if Israel does it yet is fine with any other country doing it. This is antisemitism as why is something only bad when the only jewish state in the world does it?

If a criticism does not fall into either group, then it's not antisemitism.

I also have not labeled everyone as "allies of hamas" what you are thinking about is when I have replied to anons and people saying they are riding hamas's dick or have drunk the hamas koolaid. This is simply me calling out people who are falling for hamas propaganda. Microsoft literally did a report earlier this year on Iran pushing pro hamas propaganda online and getting a lot of engagements. You can search the research findings yourself online as it's free to view.

Whilst I do understand that my replies can be harsh, from my perspective, I am getting a lot of asks, a lot of which I just delete and do not answer, of people who do not understand the basic concepts I have explained here and also like to do the whole "oh you only post about pancakes, you must hate waffles" thing. And it gets tiring and annoying. I do get fed up with people who do not understand nuance when it comes to things or that I might only focus on the Jewish and Israeli side of things because there are already so many great voices there speaking out for Palestine. Adding my voice won't do much more for palestine so instead I lend it back to my community, trying to fight antisemitism and xenophobia.

And the thing is, antisemitism deserve to be spoken about. It deserves blogs which only speak about it or is the main focus. I've experienced a lot of it in my life. I'm not gonna just trauma dump right now but I have been hate crimed before. It was not fun. And when I see levels of antisemitism which is worse than during the time I was hate crimed and a lot of the rhetoric being said that I was hate crimed for, I can't help but to not want to lend my voice to speak out about antisemitism.

Onto your last point, I have never justified any Palestinian civilians deaths. The closest I have ever gotten to it was on a post talking about the hostages where I say it is a difficult situation as Palestinian civilians have died during the hostages rescue and that Palestinian and Jewish and Israeli lives are all equal in value. And that its also hard because if the hostages were not rescued, they would likely have been killed at some point in the future and it's just a hard situation as my heart goes out to all the Palestinians who died that day as well as that I am happy that 4 hostages are home. In that post I also mentioned that my ideal scenario is no one dead, both in the operation and in the war in general and for everyone to be safe.

The other thing which I get a lot of anons about is whenever I bring up the war crimes done by hamas, such as in that same post about the hostages, I mentioned how it is a war crime for hamas to have the hostages in a civilian area and that in the eyes of international law, those Palestinian deaths are due to Hamas.

I honestly don't think that either of those things is justifying the IDFs actions. What I do think is that you, and so many others are afraid of nuance. As soon as someone like myself goes "these are all the factors at play and it sucks that things have turned out as they have" and not "idf bad no nuance ever" you get uncomfortable. And its fine to be uncomfortable. But what isn't okay is taking that feeling of uncomfortableness and directing it into misreading jews online to try and feel secure in your world view again.

I honestly hope that you have read all of this, as I know it's a long post, and you consider everything I have said.

#antisemitism #israel #i/p #jumblr #palestine #i/p war #gaza #am yisrael chai #ask clownie

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