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#so i don't like taking random things! idk the process feels best when it comes from me but i also love stuff that have heart in it

weebsinstash · 10 months

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Okay this is probably gonna sound really weird but this specific scenario is stuck in the brain—

Thinking of that version of things where you helped YouTwo make friends, imagine if, in some subjective way, they’re better than you. Not in a “better spider person” way, but more like a slightly more appealing face kinda way? Like you barely look different but if you put your faces into one of those evaluator things they’d get a higher score. Maybe they just have good makeup out smth idk. It doesn’t necessarily have to be this but just some random way that YouTwo is thought of as “better”

But eventually, the spider people start actively treating the copy as the original, because they have it in their heads that the original one they love is the best, so the “better” of the two must be the original. Instead of confusing psychological warfare through mix-ups, reader is actively pushed down and away by the spider people, and at this point they simply move away to a normal part of Nueva York (or their home universe, depending on how we’re doing this) since the rest of the society is clearly happy to focus all their love on the other one.

The good bit comes whenever YouTwo slips up, whether by returning to their home universe if reader’s is supposed to be destroyed, making a bad comment, or just any other kind of mistake that makes the entire lobby pause and look like 👀

Because it’s not just the reveal that they’ve been believing this imposter for potentially months now, but also the fact that they now realise they pushed you away and made you feel like shit the entire time

After whatever punishment they see fit for the imposter is carried out, Miguel is rushing to find where you’re staying now so he can try to apologise or explain or try to make it right or something—

But when he’s standing at your door and running through all the events in his head, seeing how pissed you look at him, he’s wondering how he could ever convince you to love him again (he can’t help but default to kidnapping you and controlling you until you understand a fraction of how sorry he is)

Idk that’s just where brain took me— for me, at least, the best bit is the spoiling and smothering that would take place after, wanted or not!

I wrote this at midnight on my phone soo pls forgive if it’s incomprehensible lol

I'm always incomprehensible with weed or lust so you're good here lmao

Honestly I've been trying to sit and brainstorm 1. How does the Society start mistaking YouTwo for you and 2. How does this actually even work

You know how you can say "hey alexa" and she'll activate and then take further commands, but she's technically always listening to be able to receive the "hey Alexa" command? That's fucking Lyla, dude. I don't know if she's connected to every watch or just some of them but like, dude Lyla is an extremely powerful AI? How would you ever escape? It's not exactly clear how wide-ranging her abilities are, but as a program, she's not limited like you and I are. She can technically be listening and in some way processing and recording every single conversation that someone with a watch is having, or... maybe I'm thinking too much into it but sometimes I'm in the middle of brainstorming a you vs youtwo idea and my brain just goes "well wouldn't Lyla technically be there to set the record straight, wouldn't Lyla technically ALWAYS know who you are?"

And I think the answer to this problem... is to just say fuck it lmao! It's a fanfic and Lyla isn't always technically watching everything everywhere all at once even in canon right? She didn't immediately pipe up when Gwen reconnected with Miles in the beginning of ATSV, even though it technically would have been part of her prerogative to stop anything that would interfere with anomalies or the Spider Society. Technically speaking if I stayed completely 100% canon accurate this is how it would go:

YouTwo: --and they've just been pretending to be me this whole time! Please believe me Miguel, you KNOW it's me 🥺 uwu

Lyla within 5 seconds: heeeeey this is awkward but the electronic signature on your watch says you're the other one though lol? And the go home machine scans your dna and dimensional signature and the original doesnt even have a home dimension anymore? Plus here's some recorded audio from Reader's watch where you were threatening them and telling them no one will believe them if you replaced them, sooo.... awkward!

Like how fucking funny would it be if YouTwo is in HQ and is talking to Miguel and others and really playing their part and Spider Byte suddenly sees you log on this dimension's equivalent of Xbox lmao. Margo just looking back and forth and realizing holy shit. Or Reader deliberately ordering delivery food while YouTwo is out stealing their life or teaching their class and then when the delivery Spider shows up at your apartment that definitely only you have access to, that also helps kinda set things straight

I've even thought of like, you become depressed and start letting YouTwo do whatever they want and one day someone is banging on your front door and it's them "Hey you can't just COMPLETELY disappear, I don't want to work your fucking job everyday anymore, you have all these responsibilities and some of these people ALWAYS want to spend time with you" and you just smirk "oh no, guess that's your problem, 'real me'"

It's like. I'm trying to make it believable but if I ever do write the full fic (which I'm trying to but at this point I'm pulled between many different ideas) I want it to be believable? Like, for example, a lot of my dumb werewolf audiobooks have the protag being bullied and abused, and listening to those makes me MAD. I want readers to read this story and how you/Reader is being replaced and tricked and I want people to FEEL emotions about it, not just roll their eyes "this would never happen/this is so OOC"

But no definitely the yandere rose colored glasses start completely fucking you over, and I think another catalyst is, you seeing how "genuine" all your society friends act when they think it's not the real you you're talking to. Like here's an example i thought of. What if youtwo had the exact same hero name and real name as you and you're out and about one day and Miguel approaches you and he just CALLS YOU A NUMBER. Like say your home universe is 1217 and YouTwo's is 1712 and Miguel just walks up to you, "what are you doing here, 1712? You're supposed to be helping with construction in sector 6" and meanwhile you're just like holy shit do some people legitimately not even call YouTwo by an actual name, are these people more evil than I originally thought, holy shit no wonder YT wanted to steal my life" (and it's partially because depending on the person they either think of YouTwo as a Dollar Tree version of you and are nice to them as well but prefer you, OR they hate YouTwo outright for "daring to defile your image" and have the same voice and face as you, they think youtwo brings shane to you or whatever)

So not only are you starting to become upset about feeling replaced and feeling like you were never important to them to begin with, but then you're realizing that, either overall or with certain actions, that a lot of people are more outright mean and heartless than you originally thought?

And you're standing there "oh YouTwo has smaller pores and clearer skin than me, YouTwo actually knows how to dance at the clubs and parties,

BUT NO the shit where they suddenly start pointing out or criticizing things about you they've never commented on, just all of a sudden they have a LIST of things they dint like about you, when you're rhe same you've always been, SHIT HURTS, THAT'S THE DRAMA AND PAIN I'M LOOKING FOR

Miguel over here finally confronting YouTwo "and your little groveling for everyone's attention is so pathetic! Those empanadas you left on my desk weren't even good! They had all the wrong ingredients and they weren't crispy enough, i had to keep throwing them away--

You: a-actually, um, I was the one leaving you food so that you would eat. The first time came out really bad but i got better after the first time. You didn't like them, or did you not even eat them after the first time? 🥺

Miguel: --and they were fantastic, made me think of my Abuela, really took me back to my childhood, spectacular, outstanding, 5 stars

People start just "sounding off at YouTwo"

Pavitr: you wanted to try and make chai and it was so bitter my auntie poured it down the drain!

Porker: and when I introduced ya to him, you made Roger real uncomfortable with the "jokes" you made about him and his wife, which weren't that funny by the way!

Hobie: your style is conformist, it's like you have no real sense of self identity. Why did I see you at one of my concerts in a shitty leathet jacket and some brand new converse? You don't even know punk lace code, and you didn't even say hi, you just lurked like a creep

You: God DAMN that was ALL me, do you guys like ANYTHING about me????

And like, depending on what I choose or your personal preference I guess, the Spider Society has it rough too! Wait, so YouTwo WAS impersonating you, but it started when you LET THEM, and then there were times you could have came forward but didn't and basically "allowed" yourself to be treated like shit and have everything progress, so there's this, huge lingering doubt in tons of people of "wait so when was I actually spending time with Reader and when was I with the fake? Oh shit you're telling me those times the fake was rude as fuck to me, that WAS Reader, but they were rude because they were mad I didn't know who they were? But they didn't correct me and let me keep being mean to them????". Miguel is over here tearing his fucking hair out because UGH YOU'RE SO FRUSTRATING 😤 why did you let it get so bad, don't you know you could've came to him for help at any time?! (Except he totally lost your trust when YouTwo framed you for that elevator collapse from that one previous idea and he totally 100% thought you did it) but he still loves you and knows You're Going Through It, but, he definitely is. Relieved you're still ok but mad at you? Or disappointed? He's updating Lyla to keep a better eye on you, he's swapping out your watch for one that tracks and stores more information and is more personally customized, he may even decide, maybe he's got a little bit of an anxiety problem after everything that happened and he's paranoid "someone will try and take you away again"

It definitely is not your choice whether you return to the Spider Society or not, and I wouldn't put it past them to have you be "guarded" 24/7 from then on. Why is your Spidey Sense tingling when you're just out in the lobby getting some air? Because even if you can't see your loyal protectors, they sure can see you, from every visible surface, and next time you think you're alone in your apartment, well, some of your buddies CAN turn invisible. Maybe you were never really alone as you thought?

#yandere spiderverse #yandere x reader #sinprompts #yandere stuff

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morpheus-the-sandman · 6 months

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The blog is open now!! :D

Hello im lazysimpluna or you can call me Luna or Finley

My carrd

Other

More about me down⬇️ in this blog pls read everything thanks!

im not good at writing and my grammar isn't that great so forgive me for typos :'D I also didn't used Tumblr as much so I'm still learning things

Important none of the stories are Canon to clowns og project!!

the main aus that are mentioned here are the

Sandman au/ Morpheus or morph that's how most call him he's a bat demon he's there to give the children good dreams and comfort them protect them he lives in his smol dimension in the middle his tree where he lives in with Noah, his brother fushigi, ivy, and hoshiko / personality : he's sweet, caring, comforting his presence his inviting like a soft bed like you're getting tired and all yk but he can also be chaotic he loves to be crazy with his friends and do random funny stuff he's also very adventurous he loves to take a look around at places he wanders around alot of aus when he has time to he's interested in other aus that aren't dangerous or anything he loves to hang out and all so you might find him sitting near where you living at watching the stars!

Monsterbed au / crow is there to protect the children he will be under the bed or in the closet well most likely under the bed he doesn't like the closet very much / he can only speak in chirps outside his au when he's back in his he will speak normally / his au is a dreamcore au / personality : is still in work I didn't quite explored his personality yet but I would say for now that he's sweet and protective of his loved ones

SH wally ( I call him that now idk I feel like it's better then father wally) actually idk if I keep that name if you might have better names let me know I suck at them XD / anyway he's there to take in children in need let's say morph finds a child that has abuse going one or something else like it lost its parents ect morph will ask that child if it wants to come with him he doesn't force them but he if a child declines he will still look to take action and get them to a better place then in the human realm if a child says yes morph will take them to sh wallys realm and leave them there for sh wally to take care of them once they grew up they can decide if they want to leave back to the human realm or stay with wally/personality : not developed yet but he's very calm and patient that's all I can say!

Ugly duckling wally aka Noah he's morphs adoptive son/ personality : sweet, playfully, joyfully,

Hoshiko/wish wally he's also morphs adoptive son / he travels trough different aus grading wishes depending if a person deserves the wish he can see it in thair hearts if a person deserves it or not / he floats mostly in the air but obv he can also swim in water /personality : still in development but I would say he's quiet energetic, has lots of energy, he does like to mess around with someone, he's playfully and teasing,

Fushigi and ivy not alot to say here fushigi is there to defeat bad dreams ect like morph is he's morphs real brother / ivy is his best friend even tho ivy doesn't want to admit to that , fushigi found ivy while defeating bad dreams ivy was different from the other nightmares he seemed alone and seemed like he actually didn't liked to be feared and all so fushigi took him in / fushigi likes to Crochet stuff / personality of fushigi : still in development but he's sweet calm patient, ivy's personality : also still in development all I know is he's grumpy, teasing, likes to mess with people,

Comfort star / she's there traveling around aus to comfort everyone when they need it at any time when they try to sleep or whatever it might be / she has problems with feeling things she can't feel things so she might sound or act numb at times but she trys her best her sister is always there to help her with it her problem with not feeling alot is also why she often comes back with cuts ect bc she feels numb both emotionally and physically she does not feel pain so she would often be rather at morph or wherever to get stitched back up / personality : still in development but she's playfull, sweet

Letters from felix/Yeah I added another AU I have for a while idk why I didn't added him when I first did this blog but he travels trough dimensions too so I trough why not he's silly and is adventurin trough dimension and he writes letters to his human he's inspired my letters from Felix the series the bunny Basacally my childhood :3] personality : chaotic, he loves to mess around, playfully, adventures

Shooting star

She's like a help for traveling inspired by the cat bus from totoro uwu she acts pretty much like a cat and can't talk she be meowing and purring but she understand you!

And also morph father the uhh good home in this story I didn't drew him yet but he's basacally just like og home but a smol house that follows morph around

!! Boundaries!!

Yes you can

✅ make fanart absolutely tag me please!!!

✅ Shipping? Yes ofc but please only ocs sonas or yns.

✅ Im also okay with interactions trough I can't promise I will do all of them I mostly do what I feel like and if I don't feel like it I don't do it it also might take a bit

Donts❌

Please no applecest no wallycest no proships!!!❌

No nsfw with these aus mentioned here!!!❌

Don't do Ai bots of my aus I'm doing alredy bots but it takes a bit I get really exausted after a bit of working on bots like I get sleepy and all it takes a bit I know I'm working on them for quite a while now but still have patients I'm also not an expert when it comes to bots I'm still learning!! ❌❌❌

Don't message me privately if I don't know you please if I know you for a bit from my comment section you can ask me if you can message me and I might say yes , please have patients with me I don't feel comfortable calling you my friend so soon so I just call you a mutual if I know you for a longer while I might call you a friend! I had a really bad experience with an ex friend of mine I knew since my childhood and that left marks , I might get easily overwhelmed or exausted so I might dip or don't talk at all please don't feel like I'm ignoring you or anything I'm not I'm simply not feeling like talking or it is to much at that day for me!❌❌❌

🌟Things about me that are important 🌟

my pronounce are she/her, he him, im genderfluid and aroace, bisexual, ❤️

I have auditory processing disorder or called

(APD )

Wich makes me slower I might forget alot of things or I also have hearing problems sometimes like when somone calls me it doesn't end up in my brain I'm also very sensitive so sounds loud notices specifically

I also take a while to understand things so be patient with me

(HSP ) I am a highly sensitive person

I also have social anxiety

I'm really sensitive like I would say emotionally there are often times where I do take things too serious or something please tell me talk to me about those things if I understand stuff the wrong way

I'm 22 years old and German

I only speak English and German I can't speak other languages

I have 29 aus by now I might add more depending on what ideas I get ( idk for sure I know I have alredy alot and I didn't even developed alot of them enough I do want to put an line to it but I can't I love creating I love making it makes me happy so just be aware XD when I decide to do a blog for my other aus that I might not post alot about those depending on how I'm feeling ( maybe I post more when I get asks idk)

Socials : I have tik tok Instagram also yt I also have another Tumblr but I don't like that one as much atm it's more actually idk it was more meant for oploading ahit art and such but I don't feel the account anymore idk I'm weird xd so ig I might do a new main maybe?? Idk anyhow I'm the most active on tik tok name is lazysimpluna on all platforms!

Fandom I'm in atm

Welcome home

And poppy playtime

I hope you have a wonderful time here!! :3

🌟Refs of my sillys🌟

#art #artists on tumblr #artwork #digital art #welcome home #welcome home au #welcome home artist #welcome home arg #morphthesandman #askmorph #wh multiverse

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gaysetokaibas · 6 months

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i don't think kaiba is materialistic in the way that he has to own the most expensive things or cares about being seen as classy, but i do think he does it out of an obsessive need for quality and perfection.

random hc that came to me:

seto kaiba gets obsessed with mechanical keyboards. it's not because he thinks they're something super beautiful or that he particularly likes them, but in my vision, he's working at the office and gets randomly really frustrated by his work. it's a lot of effort, deadlines aren't lining up, whatever the reason, but everything feels like it's going wrong.

in particular, the sound of his clack-y generic keyboard is pissing him off. he can't fix the scheduling and production issues, but he can fix this.

so, he spends any free time he can researching the best parts. he buys multiple different switches, different boards, plates, foam, stabilizers... he tries dozens of combinations until he can find something that finally fixes the frustration in his bones, until he's spent thousands on miscellaneous parts and pieces. he gets there, eventually, and when yugi comes to his office he takes note of the fancy looking keyboard and goes "wow, i didn't know you were such a keyboard enthusiast" and he's not. its just how he finds some semblance of control in his life amidst everything else.

in my head, kaiba does this often. a lot of people just think he's the type to gain and abandon multiple hobbies or interests because of it, but really its how he keeps himself sane. he just fixates on something that he can actually fix and control when things around him are spiraling. he finds the most extravagant and niche watch designs that satisfy every minute thing he could want, while keeping the aesthetics that he prefers, before proceeding to mass-manufacture them as an excuse of "it's for the business." his suits are tailored to perfection, because when he's frustrated and over-stimulated, he hates the way certain stitches feel against his skin or how the forms look in the mirror. he ends up spending exorbitant amounts of money in the process, but doesn't realize it until weeks after it's passed.

joey def hates this, by the way, because he can relate but it's not the same. most people don't really get why kaiba does this stuff, but joey picks up on it instantly. he's the type of person who, when struggling with something, he pours himself into a new video game or a new duel monsters deck archetype and studies it obsessively, and when it's reflected in kaiba he's upset because its just another habit that they share, but he feels like he has to work for whereas kaiba is just throwing money at the wall until he's happy again.

idk how to end this post so stan seto kaiba i guess

#ygoau.txt #seto kaiba #yugioh #ygo #kaiba #headcanons #ofc #jounouchi katsuya #joey wheeler

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linawritesocs · 6 months

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Here is my writing for you <3

Aka reasons why I KNOW Lilia x Lina x Rollo is canon frfr

First of all, the vibes and the aesthetics are there. Trust

The :D x :( x :| dynamic is so fun. So so fun

Lilia is scooping you and Rollo up in his arms and giving you both forehead kisses <3

You and Rollo have things in common and I think you'd be able to help each other get through a lot of stuff!

Plus Lilia is there to always support you and he's very understanding!! No judgment from him at all, absolutely 0

Again, LILIA AND ROLLO WOULD FIND YOUR SMILE AND LITERALLY EVERYTHING ABOUT YOU STUNNING!!! GORGEOUS!!! They wouldn't want to change a single thing about you!

They'd take such good care of you, no cap. Seriously. They'd be absurdly good at it. And they're incredibly careful and ask if you're comfortable :)

Why did they fall for you? Not sure with them but in my head, they saw a failgirl meow meow (affectionate) and went "OMG I LOVE THEMMM" and "...Okay so I love them"

Also that one Halloween drawing you did is like. Stuck in my head permanently. The vampire x witch x priest one.

Ngl I think y'all should have a pet cat. Idk why but it seems right

So the fireworks during masquerade, right? Or whatever they were if they weren't fireworks, I'm not sure jsndkfs

I think Rollo would take you both to a place that's kinda far and the sounds aren't very audible, but the view of the town is great! And you get a clear view of the fireworks so that you don't have to miss how pretty they are!

I'm trying to think of date ideas but I'm kind of blanking rn? I know it'd be something more low-key... OHHH what if cat cafe??? (I feel like I keep mentioning cats but that's literally your and Rollo's energies, I can't just forget cats)

Whenever you're sick, Rollo would definitely take some time away from NBC, like a few hours, so he can see you and make sure you're doing all right! Maybe he brings you some food or medicines he heard is good for you!

I'm sure Lilia does a really good job too, plus he'd make sure you aren't lonely and in low spirits!

Random thought: If Silver is basically the son of Lilia and Lina, what's Rollo's role? I feel like he doesn't dislike Silver, that's all, but if you have thoughts... 👁️👁️

Cottagecore house cottagecore house cottagecore house

Once y'all graduate I can see you having a cottagecore house. Yes just like Seth and Rollo

That's all I have rn but PLEASE RAMBLE IN YOUR RESPONSE IF YOU WANT!!! I WANNA HEAR MORE ABOUT THEM <333

HSDHDJSJSDJKSJS TARUUUUU THIS IS SO CUTE I'M GONNA CRYYYYYY

and you're right. rollo x lina are just cat x cat. both of them are so cat-coded.

THE IMAGE OF LILIA SCOOPING BOTH ME AND ROLLO UP IS SO FUNNY but it's okay i know he can do it

everything about the vampire x priest x witch au is perfect. lina and lilia already dating and lilia going "hey dude wanna form a polycule". rollo naming one of the bells john and making cole and sebastian worry for his mental health. rollo being So Scared that someone is gonna find out about his relationship with those two but when cole and sebastian do find out they just go "OMG SO YOU DO HAVE BITCHES SLAYYYYY- ahem, we mean. wow.. you're not maidenless.." lina secretly being a catgirl and hiding her cat ears under her witch hat and fully turning into a cat when she's comfortable around rollo. honestly priest!rollo is a very popular au concept especially with a vampire/witch/other "monster" s/o but like. come on. we all know this is the best one /lh

. I GUESS SILVER CAN ALSO BE ROLLO'S SON THOUGH THAT'D BE SO FUNNY IT'S LIKE ".. so. uh. y-you're dating my father." ".. yes" "and you're also dating my mother" "also yes" ".. uh. does that make you-" "i am literally one year older than you" "okay father number two" NO BUT THEY EVEN LOOK KINDA SIMILAR. KNIGHT OF DAWN WHO. i'm actually obsessed with the way how silver actually looks and acts like a mix of them. he can appear very suddenly, scaring others in the process, just like lilia, he's eepy like lina and also tends to blame himself a lot just like them and he looks a lot like rollo and is very serious and responsible, just like him. he is literally their son. i'm gonna sob

here are some of my fav lina x lilia x rollo concepts if you don't mind me sharing!

lilia is 700 years old and he's been through so much and it took a lot of time for him to change and become the gremlin that he is today. lina is MUCH younger than him, but she also had to go through a lot of horrors. lilia never says that their trauma isn't valid and never says stuff like "well at least you didn't have to fight in a war". he just hopes they can feel a bit lighter when he's around.

i've mentioned before that i imagine lina's unique magic hurting them a lot in exchange for them to do things as good (or better than) as others so yeah, maybe rollo would find lina suspicious at first but then imagine him finding out about what her magic is doing to her and he's like. "SEE. I AM RIGHT. WE HAVE TO SAVE YOU WE HAVE TO GET RID OF MAGIC WE HAVE TO-" and lina is standing there like "sir.. why do you want to save me.."

*sobs* rollo putting a flower in lina's hair while she's sitting lost in thought and comparing her to that flower *CRIES*

rollo being confused why lilia is 100% okay with a poly relationship and lilia is like "well. uh. well. you see. i have EXPERIENCE" mallenoa and her husband (possibly crowley)

ACTUALLY IT'S SO FUNNY bc if you think about it lina x lilia x rollo is like a reverse version of that relationship. it's not the "actual queen" and a "trash man" it's "the nbc student council president and the most talented student from that school" and "a wet cat i found on the street and said "i just think it's neat"".

*SOBBING* LINA HAS NOTICEABLE FANGS.. DO YOU KNOW WHO ALSO HAS THOSE.. which means linalilia can just bite rollo whenever they want.

lina and lilia dye each other's hair all the time and try to make rollo join them. they fail but it's okay

#AGAIN THANK YOU SM!!#lina answers #friend: taruchi!

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traumasurvivorshelpingsurvivors · 6 months

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Tw for csa, nightmares and flashbacks, csa detail

I just wanna vent

Last night I had a horrible nightmare of getting raped. It lasted for a long time and I'm still shaken from it. It brought back many flashbacks when I woke up. Idk why but even tho it was my mom who sa me, whenever I have a nightmare of sa (which happens a lot) my mom is never the rapist? Like its either my dad or a random person. Which is weird cuz my dad never sa'ed me. Sure he did constantly commented on my body ("your ass is growing, you're growing up!") Which make me feel uncomfortable. And one time he peeked through the toilet when i was using it to see if im on my phone, which was also weird but like he ddint mean to be inapp he just wanted to make sure i wasnt on my phone. But he never really did anything physical. Anyways the nightmare brought back shitty memories. I can still feel her lips and hands on me. It makes me feel so disgusted with myself, I feel like im dirty and gross for it. Ik it's not my fault but I just can't help feeling ashamed. My mom doesn't sa me anymore but she kinda does like.lower forms of it. Like slapping my ass or touching it, but that's normal right? I mean, I don't think she really means it in an inappropriate way, like she might just think it's a cute way of showing affection. My family is really physically affectionate after all, even my dad do that. Idk man I just feel so weird rn. I feel like I wanna get away from my body, like I don't belong in this thing. I wanna rip my skin off just to feel like she's never touched me. I wish she never did this to me, I wish we were a perfect family like how other ppl think we are. Worst part is they act so nice, they're good parents. It's just when I think of my childhood it's pretty messed up. I just keep trying to push down these feelings and ignore them so I can live in this fantasy of having perfect parents, but lately it's been becoming harder to do it. Thanks for listening, I hope u guys have a great day <3

- 💛

Hi 💛,

I'm so sorry about what you've been going through, as well as the dream you had. While you said your dad didn't outright SA you like your mom did, it sounds like he's still made inappropriate comments towards you and touches your butt. Please know that these things are unacceptable and you don't deserve to be treated this way.

It can be confusing when we dream of scenarios that are a bit different from our actual trauma, and it's natural to wonder why these details are changed in the dream. Sometimes our brains experiment with different dynamics to see how that changes the situation. Because for example there is quite a big difference between being raped by a stranger and being raped by your mom, and perhaps entertaining the idea of it being a stranger is a way to navigate and understand the dynamic between you and your mom. But sometimes its more symbolic or metaphorical. For example, if you dream about your dad being the perpetrator, perhaps it could symbolize the ways he makes you feel uncomfortable in your own body. Especially with trauma, it's natural for dreams to be a way to process and make sense of your experiences.

While it's okay for families to be physically affectionate, it must come with a certain level of care and respect for others' boundaries, which sounds absent in your family dynamic. It sounds like your family crosses physical and sexual boundaries under the guise of "normal" affection. Normalizing this behavior is what enables the abuse to continue. Please know that your body is yours and you deserve the right to say who can or cannot interact with it.

If you can access or afford it, a mental health professional such as a therapist can best help you process your trauma, the dreams you've been having, and equip you with useful coping tools that you can take with you along your healing journey.

I hope I could help and please let us know if you need anything.

-Bun

#mod bun #trauma talks #tw abuse #tw child abuse #tw sa #tw csa #tw r #💛

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phenomenalgirl9 · 2 years

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Elder Vampire! Seokjin x Newborn Vampire! Reader: Blood is Red

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Part ii

A/n: You need to read the first part before you read this. Idk how this is, its short though. Hope its going good.

(In this AU just the bute doesn't change you, it kills you untill you are provided the blood of an pure blood vampire within a certain time to get turned... my au my rules 😛) There are gonna be mentions of blood and almost death so read with caution.

Summary: Namu clan has always been very strict and secretive as to whom they let into their clan. And go strictly by the rules of the Vampire Community as to never put a threat to their identity. What happens when Jimin finds a girl on the verge of death in an abandoned street.

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"Take this" You noticed Seokjin giving you a box "This is your new calling device, what do you call it.. um.. a Felltone?"

You smiled and said "You mean a Cell phone?"

"Ah yes" he said sitting beside you "How do you feel?"

"I feel..." You trailed off thinking if you should really tell him. Then again, you did feel comfort in Him "I don't really know how to feel Seokjin"

"Jin" he said

"What?"

"Call me Jin instead of Seokjin all the time" he said smiling "and its okay to feel confused but you can talk to me or the boys anytime okay? Isn't it time for your weaponry training?"

"Yeah. Thanks" you said.

"So which weapon do you thing you can master?"

"I feel comfortable with swords. Did fencing when I was very small." You said

"Thats also happens to be my speciality" Jin said.

"Wow then I'll have to fight you to see" you said smirking.

"Are you challenging me?" He asked

"What if I am?" You winked and walked to the training areas.

----------------------------------------------------

"Do you miss anyone?" Jimin asked.

"I miss my friends Hosu and Ciel, we were in the same orphanage after my parents died. I worked at a cafe but I'm sure the owner thinks I'm dead, which I technically am" you said shrugging.

"Hey! We aren't dead! Well technically but still!" Jungkook said sitting on the rails infront of you.

You both laughed at the bunny boy. These moments that you spend with them after training has become a routine now. They always tried their best to make you feel welcomed, all of them did for the past 2 weeks. You also learnt various new things about the people here.

You learnt that the vampires live in small groups under the clans. Every clan has different leaders and rules but a few basic rules are always maintained that are a few Lords somewhere in Rome. You've also learnt that vampires are not actually different beings but just humans with a bit different condition. Namjoon took a good hour to explain that being a vampire is not being immortal, but extra mortal, the body gets heightened abilities, more durability and the aging process goes very slow, but the body systems are still working and thus the need to feed on blood comes to keep the body healthy. And also so that one doesn't attack random people. A newborn nedd more often feeding, but as time goes the gap between 2 feeds can be prolonged. You've been feeding from blood bags warmed in the microwave every other day.

You've learnt that the one which you're in is the Bangtan house and here resides the Clan leader of the Namu clan, the one which all these people belong to and you too. And there are more houses belonging to this clan around the country. And there are other clans as well. Yes, the clan leader of the Namu Clan is Kim Seokjin.

You also learnt even though he looks young, Jungkook as actually one of the oldest turned Vampire, followed by Namjoon and then Taehyung. Then their were the ones like Jin, Jimin and Jihyo who were born vampire.

You had been better at using your heightened senses, being able to detect things from far.

"Hi Tae" you said as Tae appeared.

"Ah! You detected me! I was so fast!" He said

"I told you my senses were good even for a normal human" you said shrugging.

"Okay. But Jin hyung is calling you downstairs" he said. On hearing the name you felt like their were butterflies in your stomach that your slow heart beat faster, and so many more. Why? You don't know.

"Okay" you said and skipped downstairs.

"Hey Jin" you said, he was in the kitchen, that's when you realised, it was the dine in night of the house and all the members of the house are supposed to be present at dinner tonight.

"Hey! Yn-ah" he said, his voice sounding like music to your ears.

Suddenly you saw something that left you. "J-J-Jin! Garlics!!!! What are you doing!" You shouted.

"Yeah? How else am I gonna make Jjajangmyeon?" He said surprised.

"But! But! Isn't garlic bad for vampires?" You said. And as soon as the words left your mouth Jin burst out in laughter.

"You... Belive.... That?!" He managed to say and laughed again. Strangely, his laughed sounded like the sound of windscreen wiper of your old car.

All of a sudden, you hear a loud sound, you saw Taehyung, Jihyo and Namjoon run in

"We-we're under attack!" Jihyo said.

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Taglist (open): @jung-nika-hoseok @bbl32

Comment or send an ask if you wanna be my permanent tag member for BTS or the others too.

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female-malice · 1 year

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i'm 15 and this guy on discord has been trying to convince me into abandoning homosexuality and becoming catholic. he literally talked me into attending a catholic church. idk if i'm gullible or he's convincing but this goes against everything i've ever believed. i started having dreams about demons and God again the other night. i don't know what to do or even if i should do anything. he says the dreams are a sign i'm headed in the right direction and to pray to get rid of the demons. i think i need help but idk where to go and church is starting to be comforting instead of torturous like it used to be.

So, at the moment, you're being targeted by evangelicals.

The moment you walk into church, everyone in the room takes note. They all know you're new or you're returning after several years away. They've come across dozens just like you. And there's a whole initiation process that they're specifically trained for. Making you feel as comfortable as possible is their job. That's their life calling. To convince as many people as possible to commit to church.

So it's important you understand that you haven't wandered into a place that happens to be comforting. You're in a place that is strategically working to recruit you. Nothing is a coincidence. It's a campaign.

How and where you spend your time is up to you. I'm an atheist and I'm a spiritual person in my own way. I believe the spiritual path is important and unique to each individual. In my experience, church and organized religion are too limiting. Sometimes when people attempt to rigidly define spirituality, they end up snuffing it out. I don't want my spirituality snuffed out, so I don't define it. But this is just true of me and we're all different. I won't tell you what to do because I trust that you know what's best for you.

But I will tell you that I've had all kinds of crazy dreams. I've had demon dreams. Very incredible fascinating, thrilling, and sometimes terrifying dreams. I kept a dream journal for a while and I've made art from my dreams. The more you write down your dreams, the more detail you remember. A few months in, you'll be remembering the entire thing like it's a strange movie. At first, some of the details seem so messed up and scary.

"Why were my childhood friends there? What about these other characters who I've never met in my life? Why were we in this futuristic setting? Why did a giant hole tear through the fabric of reality? And why was it the end of the world with demons everywhere?"

I would often wake up asking myself these questions as I wrote my dreams out. And you know what? After a while, I really came to enjoy these dreams. I stopped focusing on the why. And I started to enjoy all the interesting details of my imagination. The dreams didn't bother me anymore. They were so fantastic and wild. I would never be able to come up with a story like that while I was conscious.

Dreams are a gift of biology. They are not an evil to be conquered. They are not a message from a higher power or creator. They are not from god. They are an important neurological process. They help us come up with new ideas and new solutions to problems. And that entire process comes from us. It's our neurons collaborating with our sleep cycle in a fascinating way. Sometimes dreams are nonsensical or disturbing. And it's important to remember that a lot of it is random. Just random firing of neurons. But randomness can lead to inspiration and can bring a fresh perspective to a stale problem.

And that's all a very long way of saying... embrace the demons.

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doctorguilty · 2 years

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a lot of new mediums are often dismissed as easy even digital art is dismissed as not real art because the computer did it. the debate on what counts as real art is never ending and shouldnt even be a thing because all art is subjective, it doesnt matter what medium is used to create it

Putting these together because they go hand in hand and you're both very right imo!! There's this strange hangup people have about the generation process about it not being "drawn" by a human the way someone puts a pen to a wacom tablet or pencil to paper or brush to canvas but.. there is already types of art accepted that don't involve that? Ie photography

Take this photo I took last year for example. I'd consider it pretty artistic and beautiful:

My hands touched nothing in this but my phone camera (not even a high grade digital camera). I didn't build the ride. I didn't stage those people on the ride. I just walked around to a location I wanted to take my shot and I took several photos and chose the best one. And by "best" I mean the one that spoke most to me as the moment I was capturing. And those choices come through, like, I took the picture in motion when I could have just taken a picture of the still ride. I took it at night instead of daytime. I cropped the photo in a certain way. So is this not art because the only things I chose were nothing I put my hands on? Is it meaningless because of that? Soulless? I reckon it's not a professional quality piece, but I'm not interested in selling it professionally. This is art for me. Just like many of my drawings. Just like the work people do in the ai software.

And the philosophical questions about What is Art aside, the fact of the matter is I can tell the vast majority of people who shit on this do not know a THING about the process. If ANY of them do. I have yet to see a single anti ai art argument cross my path that actually goes in depth to the way the software works, how the tools work, how images are generated, what they are generated from, nothing. It's just completely opinionated statements about what art is, and a lot of misleading info or outright misinformation.

I don't think everyone needs to love it or utilize it or anything. There's plenty of art mediums I personally have no interest in. But the way this is just like, socially accepted online to stay ignorant, and harass people doing PERSONAL!! WORK! HOBBY ART!!! Is insane

And "but what about corporations exploiting it!" Is not an excuse to target independent artists like, hello. Do you go on random artists cgi animations and bitch about how marvel movies ruined everything? Literally industry exploitation of art tools (especially digital) has been happening forever, and I'm not saying that's okay but like? I don't see anyone smacking Maya out of people's hands because that's what south park is animated with -_- idk just like. You can be anti capitalist without trashing other people just to feel superior because you think you can Decide what forms of art are valid or not like. Mega eyeroll I dunno man!!

#long post

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bluepeachstudios · 1 year

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TMNT 2003 had been my special interest for over 10 years and honestly got me through hell so so many times

I re-watched it a few months ago and wasn't planning on doing it again but well you made me go watch it again last night and now i have to bing watch seven seasons again and gosh I'm so happy and uh idk why I'm telling you this lmao

Also it breaks my heart that leosagi's last canon convo was during the whole leo PTSD stuff

Like he didn't even get to apologize

Ugh that's so frustrating

If i ever become a multi millionaire you can bet I'll found a remake of the 2k3 version so uh ... Let's hope i do become rich ig...

Uh but like also

Your art is amazing i really like how you draw the turtles and poses and uh .... I personally have some struggles with angles in anatomy any tips ? Or like any general recommendations for you artist fans ?

And also i hope anyone who reads this has an awesome day/night

Remember to hydrate<3

*sorry for the random wrong rambling*

Oh man, same! I started watching ninja turtles when the episodes were still coming out, back in '04 I think. I was 9! I got super into it, I got my best friend into it, we played with ninja turtle toys for so long.

My medical issues weren't so bad back then, but they were still a Whole Thing(tm) and I had the DVDs of the first 12 episodes of season 1 and all of Fast Forward once that came out. I watched both a LOT when I was sick, especially Fast Forward. It has gotten me through ROUGH times.

I'm glad you're rewatching it again! I've rewatched it probably three times in the last six months? I'll probably do it again, too hgdkfjg it's so good

Usagi does show up at April and Casey's wedding in the last episode, so I like to imagine that he and Leo had a time off-camera where they met and sparred a little and talked. I like to fill in the blanks. B)

A remake of '03 would be SO cool oh my god fhgfjg I would love that so much!!

ThANK YOU FOR THE COMPLIMENT AHH!! I struggle with angles in anatomy as well, foreshortening is rough oof. The way I learned to draw things from certain angles is taking stock photos and tracing over them to see how things were drawn. I especially love AdorkaStock (previously SenshiStock), their stuff is GREAT for practicing poses. Looking up youtube videos on gesture drawing can also help loosen up poses. I also really love the Morpho art books, they're super helpful.

A lot of practicing art is just drawing. Even if you feel like it's not good, you should still draw it! As long as you're having fun and enjoying the process. That's the important part. Draw what you want, if you don't like it then don't post it anywhere! Even if you do like it, you don't have to post it. Sometimes it's nice to just draw something that's all yours.

Don't apologize for rambling, as you can see, I tend to do the same thing, and honestly ain't rambling half the fun of having a conversation?? I love hearing from people!

#asks #ame talks

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thesnailkiwi · 1 year

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3, 4, 11, 16, 18, 20, 23, 24, 26, 46, 56, 73, and 74 for the fic writer ask game? (you don't have to answer all of them these are just the ones i find interesting)

alright alright yes yes

dont worry i love asks

3)Describe the creative process of writing a chapter/fic.

It depends on the story and what is happening. Usually, i type out a short summary of the whole story, decide where the best places to split it are, and write it in parts. Other times i just wing it and hope it sounds good.

4) Where do you find inspiration for new ideas?

Everywhere. Other fics, poems, songs, phrases, scenes. Even items. I especially love the ones from my dreams. Inspiration is everywhere- you just have to look into the simplest things in a different way than you see them.

11)Link your three favorite fics right now.

Time to expose myself! Also, this is the hardest decision I'll ever make.

I also want to mention a few others if you dont mind

Featherweight- DoctorSiren

Poisoned Rats in a Pot of Grain- TheYesterdayShow

Maybe the World Isn't so Wide- MsDizzyDahlia

16) How many fic ideas are you nurturing right now? Share one of them?

Oh. oh no. let me get my google docs and notes app out.

This one is actually one that I got from a dream.

Cc!Grian goes on a camping trip and hikes up a mountain alone because he can't sleep. He finds a piano that turns out to be magic and he plinks it. It turns him more and more into his character each day. The next day he goes to find it and it's gone. He runs away to try and hide it but his friends file a missing report. They find him a week later alone in a cave. During that time, he get visited by watchers and is shocked bc he made them up but they're real. They try to kill him because him turning is a "glitch" but he gets away.

After they find him, grian refuses to tell them anything. He has to stay home and go to therapy bc man's traumatized. He stays with Timmy.

One night during dinner, his character takes over. Timmy panicks and calls Scott and mumbo over. Grian puffs out his wings and Jimmy realizes what's happening. They're able to calm him down and cc!grian takes back over.

They have to figure out how to save him before it's too late and he turns fully into his character.

Mumbo is doing research and finds smth about it. They have to find a real eye of ender.

They return to the spot where the piano used to be and dig to find the eye. They do, and they save him. But not without a fight first because c!grian is very argumentative.

18)Do you title your fics before, during, or after the writing process? How do you come up with titles?

After. There are exceptions, but almost always after. I think of key words and phrases from (or that describe) the story. Or I just make random stuff up that sounds cool.

20) Have you noticed any patterns in your fics? Words/expressions that appear a lot, themes, common settings, etc?

Yes. Lots of melodrama, passing out, self-worth problems, and flower husbands.

Joking aside, definitely. I love it when characters pass out on their enemy and get carried. Idk why, its just funny and sets up for a lot of humiliation. I also love not-actually-unrequited-feelings. I'm not sure about what specific words/phrases, but i know that they are definitely there. Themes usually include things like live life to the fullest, appreciate what you have until its too late, and that things are never as they seem.

23) Best writing advice for other writers?

My best writing advice is be you and write what you want to write.

Admittedly, I havent updated my biggest fic i have in over 3 months. It just wasn't fun to write anymore and my motivation went *fart noise*. Yes, okay, I've gotten comments, but I'm also happy and want to write a different ship at the moment. It also helps with the feeling of being obligated to have deadlines and one-up yourself every chapter. Sure, those things are great, but you should enjoy writing and what you produce, not find it annoying and tiring.

There are other things, like grammar, POV, and formatting, but we won't go into those.

24) Worst writing advice anyone ever gave you?

OOO YOU'RE ABOUT TO HEAR SOME ABSOLUTE BS

Alright, so, when I first started writing, I watched some youtube vids on stuff like good writing, plot, and stuff like that.

The lady in the video. Ugh. alright, so she ofc was hating on fanfiction, and said "It's always wiser to make your own stories and characters" or something like that. Bish, have you seen the ao3, fanfiction.net, and wattpad community??? She then went on to go and say the opposite of what i said above. That you should always listen to your readers and shiz and that you, the author, should always make them happy even if it hurts.

She also was like "don't use tags like 'yes,' bob growled' because its improper and growling is an act, not a tone of voice." No, it is actually correct writing.

She also was deprecating young authors telling them that they suck.

26) Which of your fics would you call your wildest ride?

Uhhh, what's your definition of wild?

A fallen angel spreads its wings, wishing to fly away- storywise can be counted as crack personally. it makes no damn sense anymore.

My superhero AU- this is going to get crazy. you have no idea. the sheer emotions and attachment i have to this one. I will make you cry.

46) How would you describe your style? (Character/emotion/action-driven, etc)

My style is both character driven and emotion driven. I have this weird thing where if I'm writing, I can like, BE the character or smth. I get to know what they would do, think, and feel, and then mix it with some of my own before it gets out of hand. It happens when reading, too.

There is a downside, such as what happens to them physically i can feel, but it makes it easier to drive the story. I give it bulletpoints of what i want to happen, and it will get it there eventually.

(I have a fun story that came with this one time, but I'll tell it at a later date)

56) What’s something about your writing that you pride yourself on?

Yes yes yes. I pride myself on the sheer amount of ideas I get daily. I get like 2 ideas daily. Yeah, it sucks that I cant write them all, but at least i have a variety. If you ever want a story idea, I have SO MANY

73) What do you think makes your writing stand out from other works?

Honestly, I don't know. I feel like that is for you guys to decide.

As a reader, it's easier to pick out things and decide what is different and what is the same. When writing, I criticize myself so much, like "thats basic" or "thats repetitive". Yet people still read it, so I must be doing something right.

74) You’ve posted a fic anonymously. How would someone be able to guess that you’d written it?

My writing style, themes, ships, and overdramatic feelings.

My style is kind of a mix of rambling and story telling. Also the question from earlier about key words, phrases, and stuff like that describes it all. I love amplifying feelings, and of course, making my characters go through hell and then dragging them back out.

#thesnailanswers #bisexual-fandom-trash

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realtalk-princeton · 2 years

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Do you have any advice for how to make the most out of being a student at Princeton? I feel like I spend so much time studying or doing work that I don't have time to explore any of its other resources (meeting professors/finding internships/creating independent projects/idk). At the same time, I feel like a big part of Princeton's benefits is that there are so many more opportunities/resources available here than there are at other schools, so how can we balance that?

Response from Fallon:

hi there!! i think it really depends on which year you are in when it comes to taking advantage of pton's resources, so i can share my experience so far (as a soph). other contributors feel free to chime in :)

first off, you are so right that it seems like there are a billion things one can do here. at times it can feel like we will never be able to fully utilize all that is accessible to us, and that's okay. we're not meant to exploit every single opportunity, career-related or otherwise, during our years here. this is because our relationship with the pton name extends far beyond graduation, so there's plenty of chance for you to keep leveraging all the opportunities that are available to you just by the virtue of being a pton student.

on to the more practical stuff. when i was a frosh, a lot of the time was spent studying, acclimating to princeton, making friends, trying out some clubs i found interesting, and that's about it. it's not until this year that i felt like i could seriously take advantage of the opportunities available to me here, since i've known a thing or two about how to stay on top on classes while exploring other things. here are some good starting points, depends on your class year and interests:

Career: talk to the people at career center + upperclassmen (seriously, they are the best "resource" you can access) to explore where your interests lie. then branch out to alumni who are working in these industries to build those connections, the earlier the better. that being said, i personally find that as a soph, my investments in career exploration (e.g., searching for internships, networking) are more fruitful than last year just bc i have more understanding of what's out there and what might be a good fit for me.

Extracurriculars/personal projects: try to explore 1-2 clubs/organizations that interest you every year/semester depends on your schedule. this is a good way to figure out what's missing on campus aka something you could spearhead and take ownership of (which is something you seem to be interested in). the keller center, for example, is a good example of a resource that you could take advantage of if you have an original idea that you wanna execute.

Relationships: i do believe the best way to take advantage of the human resource at princeton (which some argue is one its best asset) is to be genuine: to friends, professors, random people you talk to.. all of these interactions can lead you to opportunities that you may not even know of before. of course, if you want to work in a lab then the process of getting to know the professor you want to work for needs to be more intentional and well-prepared, but overall, i'd say start to build your network by being approachable and genuine -- it will pay off a few years down the line.

Miscellaneous experiences: there is no one right way to be a pton student, bc every single one of us chooses to spend our time differently, and wants to take advantage of different opportunities based on our unique interests. that being said, your experience here will be shaped by what you choose to take part in. this can range from internships (there are tons that are affiliated with the university), international experience (global seminars, iip,..) to weeks-long trips (tiger trek, brooklyn fall break trip..) and on-campus jobs [and this only scratches the surface of what's out there]. these are usually over breaks so it's a nice way to take advantage of pton resources without having to worry about classes.

i know this is an incredibly long response, but it also goes on to show the extraordinary array of resources that this place offers. what i think would be most helpful for you right now is to identify areas that you want to double down on in a certain semester/year. for example, for frosh, what's most important remains doing well in classes and maintaining good relationships with professors, so i wouldnt think too much about other opportunities (a lot of which are also not yet available to frosh). for soph, maybe career exploration and landing internships takes a lil bit more priority over classes at times. so on so forth. in short, try to break down everything you want to explore into manageable goals and actionable items depends on your current schedule, learn how to prioritize, and focus on your own journey. sometimes we feel like there's so much more we could do because we are also looking at what others are doing – but i can assure you that there's no right or wrong way of doing pton. that being said, good luck with creating your own version of pton, you got this!

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oriigirii · 2 years

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alright boys its big brain time- im gonna be honest idk what im doing but AHAJHSD IMMA MAKE THIS AS VISUALLY PLEASING FOR MYSELF MOTIVATION

finished-writing-cherry: okay i got carried away IM SORRY ITS LONG SOBS

~~~

If I had to classify Turbule as a gamer stereotype, it'd be those players who purposely do things to irritate people. Like- a switch goes off in that unga bunga brain that usually is only touched when in class, maybe. For example, if it were something like Phasmophobia (or whatever it's called I honestly forgot-), they would try and trigger a hunt to slow the process down; never tries to die though don't do that-

In short, making things as complicated and time-consuming as possible.

Prefers single-player games though! Mostly games where you just go against random players left and right. If I had to take an example then probably ROBLOX Arsenal would be a good one.

In terms of Minecraft in general, terrible sense of direction without coordinates, but doesn't know how they work either! Numbers aren't their strong suit.

Spiritually can't build anything pleasing. They see Minecraft builds online and just goes, "I wanna do that but I don't know how-" I mean they can build simple things like a house to put something in- just wouldn't look the best 🤡.. So they probably leave it to someone else.

And thus, introducing the ✨Minecraft Let's Play: Turbule and Charlie Edition✨ Episode One(1), Teaching Charlie How to Handle Himself (while teaching him life lessons by playing antagonist).

So you know how Charlie would fight mobs with his bare hands, well Turbule's watching from the cave's entrance trying to make an effective lesson plan- But honestly would start with teaching him the basics or PvP. I honestly can't think of which one so why not both. Turbule really wants someone to play with other than their fellow dorm members, so they try.

With the basics it's all in their actual survival server. What they should do first before maybe trying to find each other (mostly Turbule trying to find Charlie while my mans walking the opposite direction if I'm honest with you-).

In terms of PvP or fighting, haha.. I feel bad for Charlie. Turbule's a MENACE- I didn't put their talent as "spam clicking" for nothing! 14.5 CPS is no joke. Instead of showing an example for Charlie, they end up over simplifying it while killing Charlie in the process. Poor man- I mean I guess it's funny??

I personally don't recommend Turbule as a teacher for a game as situational as Minecraft, but for other games they're a really irritating but good teammate to have.

They would 100% get lost together. You know what one meme where it's like, "when you were following your friend but they tell you they were just following you🧍" That's basically those two, especially in the nether- Probably ended up making another camp thing in the middle of the woods and Turbule's hoping they don't get bonked by a creeper or something.

Axolotls are their favorite! Likes the idea that you can just keep them in a bucket and take them home. Wonder if you could do that with a real pet store...

Omggg theyre both sharing the unga bunga brain hahahah, also Turbule killing Charlie in pvp's is def sad but Charlie now assigns her in killing mobs while he makes their fort pretty haha, just imagining Turbule coming back from a difficult mineshaft and the first thing Charlie asks is "so you got what I asked?" And Turbule over here is struggling with that 1-2 hearts hahaha

Also Charlie would be the type to either put water in the nether or put a bed 😭 Hes smart I promise just not... gamer smart

#🍙_answers

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julialouisdreyfest · 2 years

Text

Dirt Sucker Interview

Dirt Sucker…. Like a vacuum? How did you come up with that name? I remember there being a reference to something but I don’t remember.

Dirt Sucker. . . . like getting as close to the earth as possible, living in the dirt (but yeah, also a vacuum :P)! Calling something a "piece of dirt" was an old bit Evan and I had back in highschool because it was a way to say something wasn't great, but was also somewhat socially acceptable! In the past few years I remember trying to bring it back and thinking "Dang, that really sucks dirt"; and then thinking "Dang, dirt is actually really tight, it shouldn't be an insult" and then "Hey, I suck hella dirt, we suck the most dirt!" and then voila! Dirt Sucker is born! We are all SUPER passionate about climate issues and the name lends itself well to that! After the name was solidified, we started looking for a bass player; it turned out that the perfect fit for the band (the GOAT Ruben) just so happened to be a PhD student in soil science! The universe is wild! While the name didn't come from a vacuum, the first idea I had for lyrics was about eating the dust and grime out of a vacuum (dirt is just so awesome)! -Madison

Madison- how the heck did Wired get a hold of you to do that piece? Also, how unreal was it to do a photoshoot like that? Does this mean you had to turn in your punk card? How did that feel?

The writer of Wired found me on the NJCAAE coaching website and thought it was cool that there were no other Community College Esports programs near LCCC! I think he just wanted to check out Wyoming, it was totally random! Kinda crazy! Doing that photoshoot was really weird (because idk, yeah it's weird to get photos taken of you like that), but the photographer Shawn Bush (he teaches at Casper College) was freaking amazing! While doing a shoot is weird, at least Shawn was awesome! I turned in my punk card a decade ago when I became a dad :P, I'm not punk and I'm telling everyone! It felt weird, but again; it's hard to say no to an opportunity when you don't know what it's all about! -Madison

My familiarity with Madison and Evan (outside of babes and waves) is through more emo stuff, although there was always a hardcore vein in everything i’ve seen you guys do… was there a catalyst in starting a project that was more straightforward hardcore? Or did it sort of just flow naturally?

Yooo Evan and I know the members of babes & waves, but we were never in that band! B&W was actually from Orange County, CA but they did like to come rip it up in the Mountain West region! I think Dewey owns his own Subway now and has like 6 kids (he really got around on tour)! No one really stays in touch with Risto, I think he moved to New Zealand or something (I know he wanted to leave that life behind)! Blaze now owns a "dirt to dispensary" model marijuana farm / store in California, I hear he's rich! Unfortunately, Chad passed away a few years ago :(, he loved surfing (even during high tide) and I'm glad he went out doing what he loved! As far is the band Dirt Sucker, it's a totally natural flow! We all love so many styles of punk that we wanna mash in as much as we can! I usually write one lil riff before practice and we flesh out like 90% of the songs together! All the lyrics are fully collaborative, while we pretty much all write our own lines, we share ideas and work extremely well together! The writing process for us in both music and lyrics comes very naturally and we all feel extremely lucky to be working together! We're really proud of the lyrics we write! -Madison

Madison, you recently got engaged! If the Wired article didn’t take your punk card away, surely this will take your punk card away! It’s not like your fiance plays in a sick punk band too or anything!

YES I DID :D!!! IT'S THE BEST THING EVER! Again Mr. Dad, I turned in my punk card a long time ago! Would you like to reinstate it for me (jk I don't want one :P)?! Kelsi is the most spiritual, wise, talented, intelligent, and kickass person in the universe and I'm unbelievably thankful to spend the rest of my days with her :D!! She is the brainchild of Prowler (named after Kelsi and Ana's Father's band from the 80s) which is the most "give no fucks" melt your face off rock ever \ m / !! Also the Wired article was TOTAL SHIT! The writer (Brendan Koerner) used my tragedy (which honestly shouldn't have been included) to sell a story about my esports program (which should have been the focus). The article was EXTREMELY disrespectful to women in general (didn't mention my female athletes at all) Katherine (he mocked up an autopsy report; YIKES!) and Kelsi (not mentioned more than one line and not named), chalk full of half-truths, focused on me instead of my students (LIVID about this), and really just made me look weak and stupid by making up his own narrivate to sell the pieice. My program was great, that was the story! He never let me read the article before it came out (I never even read one of the 4 drafts he supposedly wrote) and never told me the title before it was published. The whole article was unbelievably unethical! The man is trying to get a Netflix movie and legitimately wrote that article the way he did so he could make a movie (I told the people at Conde Nast that I would never support a movie EVER)! He kept telling me he wrote the article to help me get a job, but he wrote it so he could make a movie! THERE WILL BE NO MOVIE! I could say a lot more, but just know I hate it and I think it's a 0 / 10, shit a -1 /10 ! -Madison

How did you guys meet Ruben? He is a delight! Do you wake up every morning and practice self-reflection and gratitude that the universe has brought him into your lives? (Ruben, feel free to answer this for Madison and Evan)

I met Ruben at the Green House in Laramie, WY in 2020 (right before COVID)! He was there vibing and we instantly hit it off! He told me about some of his time growing up in Tacoma, WA and the bands he was in back in the day (Red Hex was his favorite)! When it came time to find a third member for DS I reached out and it was like a match made in heaven! Evan and Ruben and I linked up so well on the first day it was kind of freaky! Ruben is unbelievably talented and creative and can play anything he wants anytime (he's too GOATED)!! Yes, Ev and I wake up every morning and thank the universe for gracing us with the greatest person (and bassist for that matter) ever!! RUBEN IS THE GOAT! -Madison

The 7” fucks! So good i had to buy two. I know I’m out of the loop with the greater Denver scene, but Convulse Records seems to have come out of nowhere- do you know anything about the history of that label? Is it a homie who(mst) runs it?

Thanks dad! You're two ;P sweet! Convulse has blown up like crazy! We were just doing our Midwest tour and nearly every band we played with was like "DUDE YOU'RE ON CONVULSE THAT IS SO SICK THEY ARE THE COOLEST AHHH" and honestly, they were right! Adam Croft was the brainchild of Convulse, but we also know James Reed and a couple other Wyomingites were critical in getting it started! Adam and James are both from Sundance, WY (tiny town near Gillette)! In 2012 the now Convulse crew lived in this house called Babe Haus in Laramie, Wyoming and that's where everything really took off! We have been playing music with Adam, James, Cloe, Amos, etc. for over ten years, so we were so freaking excited to see the success of Convulse! No one deserves it more, the label works so hard and is so ethical! Great people, great bands, great ethics, Convulse 11/10! -Madison

Have you guys been writing any new material? If so, any plans for a follow up?

We are 7 songs towards a full length! We got big plans, update at the next Dreyfest :)! -Madison

Anything in particular you are looking forward to doing this year at Dreyfest?

I'm really looking forward to seeing Idaho Green, that band is kooky and I haven't seen them in like 4 years (there was a band called the High Plains Drifters last year that sounded like them, but without Dr. Tightass it was a lil different)! -Madison

Over/Under - yes, we all hate pitchfork, and yes, this is like… “their thing” but dammit! It’s too much fun not to play! I will give you a word/thing/idea, and you just have to say if you think it is underrated or overrated, and feel free to expound on your reasoning as much as you’d like, or not at all!

PT Cruisers

- Overrated, people still drive them -Madison

Video keno

-Overrated, people still play video keno -Madison

Taco John’s

-Underrated, IT'S GOOD OKAY WYOMING DID A GOOD JOB! -Madison

running/jogging

-Underrated, fitness is lit! -Madison

Rush (the band)

-Underrated, literally the greatest band of all time -Madison

HBO’s Succession

-Unrated, hardly even heard of it :(! -Madison

American Spirits

- Overrated, I like marlboros better! -Madison

Peavey amps

- Overrated, everyone has owned one at some point, but doesn't own it anymore! -Madison

Casper, Wyoming (is this a potentially dangerous question to answer?)

- Underrated, great local spots to play, eat, and drink! Would not live there though! -Madison

Bridges (the musical structure)

- Underrated, critical infrastructure! -Madison

Bridges (the physical structures)

-Underrated, critical infrastructure! -Madison

Bridges (the plural form of the card game Bridge)

-Underrated, ashes to ashes we all fall down! -Madison

Nash Bridges (the police procedural television series)

- Unrated, I'm a pop culture pleb :(! -Madison

Steve Nash (the basketball player)

-Overrated, retire my guy! -Madison

You can catch Dirt Sucker during this year's fest at Craft Local on Friday, August 5th at 8:45pm!

SEE YOU IN THE PIT!

#dirtsucker #convulserecords #billingsmontana #dreyfest #jldviii #julialouisdreyfest #Spotify

0 notes

beeindaclouds · 2 years

Note

idk if you've done this but jealous dsmp?

(ignore if needed)

I haven't yet, surprisingly lol

Hope you enjoy <3

DSMP being jealous

Pairings: Dream, Georgenotfound, Sapnap, Badboyhalo, Quackity, Karl Jacobs, Wilbur Soot, C!Technoblade, Nihachu, Eret, Punz, FoolishGamers, Awesamdude × Reader

Click here before requesting, please <3

❝ Dream ❞

Is see him being a pretty jealous person

Not to the point of being too posessive

He's gonna act jealous only if he feels threatened

Like with ex's or random people that try to steal his partner from him

He also loves to show off that you're his whenever people like that approach you

The look on their faces is something he adores

❝ Georgenotfound ❞

It takes a lot to make George jealous

But only because he's not a very expressive person when it comes to this stuff

I feel like if you get him at the wrong time he'll start acting jealous

Like the time he wasn't in the best mood, that's why you were out

And you two happened to stumble upon your ex who shamelessly flirted with you infront of him

George, having surpassed the line of "stay calm", pulled you into a passionate kiss that lasted way longer then you thought it would

After pulling away he coldly said to your ex "Now that you know that they're taken could you fuck off?"

❝ Sapnap ❞

He easily gets jealous, from small to big things

Hugging a pet for too long can make him jealous, which is noticeable because he's always pouting

But if someone is flirting with their partner?

Oh boy...I feel almost sorry for the person

Sapnap will slide his hand on your waist, giving the person the most mocking face he's ever put

"Darl, who's this? Another one of your little obsessed idiots?"

But do they quickly get shut down cause Sapnap gets scary? Oh absolutely

He loves to drag people down with his words

Does it spark rons if fight? Yes

❝ Badboyhalo ❞

He very very very rarely gets jealous

Like it happens once a year lol

A lot of people underestimate him, cause he's the sweet looking and sounding Badboyhalo

But never judge a book by it's cover

You two happened to stumble with him during a date, and your ex was quick to attack your "nerd looking boyfriend"

Your ex learned this the hard way

Bad covered yoru ears before mumbling soemthing your ex

The face of cockiness changing into a scared one happened so quickly that you didn't have time to process it, cause your ex was already running away

"What did you tell them?"

"You don't need to worry about it my muffin, they won't bother you anymore"

❝ Quackity ❞

He for some reason does not seem like the kind of person that would get jealous, especially by ex's

Cause like, if you broke up, that means that your ex sucks and that he's better so

But he does get a bit jelly whenever his friends get too close to you, jokingly or not

One time you and Karl were togheter for hours, but it was only because you barely got to see eachtoher

And Quackity got a bit jelly, glaring at Karl whenever he wasn't looking

The poor boy had shivers running down his back the entire day, without knowing why

To the mexican's joy, Karl left early cause he thought that he was getting a cold

❝ Karl Jacobs ❞

He's another pounty jelly bean

But he gets jealous only when you're not paying attention to him

He wants everything from you

And when you don't give it to him, he'll cross his arms and pount

He'll stay like that for hours if he needs to

You always give in after a while, it's imposible to ignore the cute fluffed up cheeks complimented with the little angry whines

And like a swith, his mood will go back to normal

❝ Wilbur Soot ❞

He rarely gets jealous

Cause c'mon. Who would go against someone as handsome as him?

They have no chance anyway

But sometimes, people will get cocky enough to try and test him

Like that time one of your friends, that totally didn't have a crush on you, was getting a bit to touchy for yours and Wilburs liking

The friend got scared so quickly by Wilbur's cold stare that they ran off before they could make another move on you

The british man only glared your poor friend down to warn them about their doings

❝ C!Technoblade ❞

Literally who has the balls to go against this man?

Idiots. That's who.

Techno is good at keeping emotions hidden, he's done this his entire life so he was now an expert at it

But from time to time is good to let loose a little, no?

Like that one time an obviously drunk villager decided to pull you cause he "wanted to get to know you better"

Let's just say they not only did the villager get to see the Blood God himself, but also see him in action first hand

❝ Nihachu ❞

Don't let her cute appereances fool you

She gets jealous when she needs to be

Some of your friends like to get, too touchy, with you

You have by now grown accustomed to this type of affection

Niki, not even one bit

So from time to time she loves to remind who you belong to

And she also makes sure that your friends also know about it ;)

❝ Eret ❞

She's a pretty chill person

She never had the need to be jealous of anybody or anything

But oh did she feel her blood boil when one of your ex's got too close for comfort

Before you could push them away, there she was. You're beautiful partener, towering over you and your ex

She didn't need to glare or say anything, your ex was scared just from her aura

Which also scared you too, since you've never seen her like this

Make sure to thank her later tho

❝ Punz ❞

You cannot tell me that he wouldn't absolutely put whoever was even thinking of making him jealous in their place

Punz can get possessive, not in a toxic way, but whats his shouldn't be touched

That's why he was currently glaring at the random girl that decided to randomly touch you cause "you have a cute jacket"

He doesn't give a shiz about gender, no one should touch what was his

So to prove his point, he ppulled you into him

Soft trails of kisses were being left on your shoulder, his mumbles about leaving just added to the pleasure, and his eyes never left the girl in front of you two

She scoffed and walked off, making Punz chuckle in victory

❝ FoolishGamers ❞

Foolish has two kinds of jealousy

He'll either get jealous over little things

Like you paying more attention to a movie then giving him the kisses that he needs

To solve that problem he'll start getting in the way of what you're doing

Or he'll get... seriously jealous

I'm talking lingering touches, deep kisses for you followed by cold glares towards whoever was trying to get to you

But he is always quick to go back to his usual self after the probledm was taken care of

❝ Awesamdude ❞

For some reason the idea of a jealous Sam makes me weak-

Mans so handsome, it takes courage to try and go against him

But y'know, people love to use fake confidence to get through shiz

That basically what happend to you

Someone had the audacity to show off something he was doing to you, even if they were doing it quiet horribly

Your handsome boyfriend didn't waste time in shutting them down and showing the person that you were already taken

The guy continued bullshitting, trying so hard to impress you in every way

But you were too focused on the sweet words being whispered to you by you dear Sam

1K notes · View notes

extravaguk · 3 years

Text

pairing: jungkook x reader

summary: But above all things, the last thing you expected to happen when you came back was to show your tits and get pierced by none other than motherfucking Jeon Jungkook.

Jeon Jungkook. Guk. Gukkie. Jeongukkie.

wordcount: 15k

genre: summer!au, ex high school classmaters, kinda frenemies to lovers, tattoo artist!&piercing artist!jungkook, popular!reader

rated: m (fluff - smut - angst)

warnings: you broke jungkook's heart you bitch!! , oral sex (m&f), protected sex (shocking tbh), CL as your bestie it doesnt get better than that! idk i dont wanna spoil too much

author's note: fucking finally dude!! i've been writing this since february but school was kicking my ass. now that i finished my exams and mercury is in gemini i was able to finish it. if you read this, i hope you enjoy it!

Inkphoria

You've been standing outside the shop re-reading the word for fifteen minutes, although it definitely feels like it has been longer. You're gripping the flyer too tightly, rumpling the paper in your hand until you're pretty much sure it's ruined. It's the first day of June, and it's already too hot. The sun and humid weather are causing beads of sweat to form in your hairline and your white tank top to stick to your skin. Your jean shorts didn't feel this uncomfortable a few hours ago and you're sure the heat is causing your mascara to transfer to your eyelids and lower lashline. You've never needed a slushie and a smoke this bad in forever, even if you knew the later would make your parents lose their shit.

Inkphoria

You read it again. Your brain is trying to guess what font its written in, an excuse to try to steady your heart beat until your nerves ease a little and you can finally gather the courage to step into the damn shop. You've noticed a few people passing by giving you strange looks because maybe it hasn't been fifteen minutes. Perhaps you've been unmoving like an idiot in the middle of the street for longer than you want to admit.

Chaelin's voice echoes inside your head.

'Its not that much of a big deal. It's not even that painful, trust me.'

You wish you could trust your best friend, but your best friend is also the same woman who assured you Cats was the movie of the year. Yes, not 'Cats: The Musical'. 'Cats', the movie.

'And this could be a great start to get out of your comfort zone and start living your life exactly the way you want to, not the way people expect you to. Not the way your family wants you to, not the way Adam wanted you to.'

But although her credibility could sometimes be questionable - like that time she also told you she'd tried marmite and 'honestly, it's not as bad as people make it out to be'-, you also didn't trust anybody in this world as much as you trusted her. She had always been your entire support system, the only one around you who never sugarcoated, who always treated you as an equal, who was always there for you to help you discover yourself and, at the same time, remind you of who you were.

'And it's gonna look so hot, too.'

That's it. Sticking the wrinkled flyer on your back pocket, your feet finally start moving. It doesn't take longer than three strides and you're pushing open the door.

The first thing you notice is that, thankfully, the shop is empty. The second thing you notice is the bright sky blue walls, a green undertone peaking through. Your eyes scan nervously the interior. Frames with tattoo designs and people modeling other different designs decorate the walls, some skateboards also hanging from the ceiling. A few plants in the corner, and two leather couches on either side of the room. Your scanning stops on the counter, where a girl with short, platinium hair and -what you guess is- the eighty percent of her body inked. Face included. She's been looking at you, a smirk tugging at her lips. Her tone is amused when she speaks

"Hi." she says. "You can come closer, you know? We don't bite."

Great. As if you couldn't feel more out of place, apparently you also couldn't look more out of place.

"Sorry." you gulp as you walk forward. "It's my first time doing anything like this."

She laughs this time, but it's not mean. It's not mocking, thank God, and the smile she sends you is as warm as the weather, friendly, luckily helping you calm down a bit. "A virgin, huh? JK's gonna love this." your eyes jump in surprise, but she's fast to wave her hands in front of you. "Just a joke. So, first time getting a tattoo. You have something in mind, honey?"

"Um, no. Not a tattoo. Not yet, I think." you wet your lips, regretting not reaplying chapstick before stepping inside. "A piercing."

"Oh! Cool!" she claps her hands, too excited for your own taste, pulling from under the counter a catalogue. "So, where will it be? Cartilogue? Nose? A lot of people are getting their septums pierced right now, though, so you might-"

"Nipples. Like, one of them."

Her gaze finds yours in surprise, although her face swiftly transforms again into an amiable expression. "Now, that's badass. Alright!" she skims through the pages of the catalogue until she finds the nipple piercing collection. You scratch your head before wiping your forehead sweat-free. "You can pick either barbells or hoops, although barbells heal faster and they don't move around as much. There's different kinds of metal, too. Gold or platinium. If your skin is sensitive, I recommend titanium. It's hypoallergenic and not as problematic."

The blonde keeps talking as you nod your head, a smile making its way into your face while silently thanking her for her easygoing personality. It quickly makes you feel comfortable and stupid for being so terrified of doing this.

Once you decide, settle on the cost and sign the papers, she stands up from the stool she'd been sitting on. "Ok, I'll go tell my coworker. He's been sketching tattoos all morning, it's time he gets to work!" she laughs, but suddenly your smile banishes and your throat shuts down.

"He?" your alarmed tone halts her motions and she looks back at your frightened expression.

He? A he is going to pierce your nipple? You're about to let a random stranger, a HE, see and touch one of your boobs and then pierce a needle through one of your nipples?

"Oh, baby, don't worry. I'd do it myself if I knew how to, but I only do tattoos. Most of our staff are on summer vacation so it's mostly just him and I. If you don't feel comfortable, which is totally understandable, you can wait until september when Minzy comes back and she can do it for you." It's her turn to scratch the back of her head as she adds: "but trust me, we're professionals. He's not a creep or anything like that. He's been doing this for a long time. He won't cross any boundaries."

September? You won't even be here in september. Fuck.

Sure, you could do it when you move back into the city. But this summer was supossed to be the summer. You already decided after your breakup with Adam that there would be no trace of the old you. That it was time to push yourself, to do the things that you've always wanted to do, unapologetically. To find the new you, the real you. To stop being scared.

So after going through you options for a few seconds and taking a deep breath, you make up your mind.

"It's fine. I can do it."

≿━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━༺❀༻━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━≾

"JK, sweetheart!"

Jungkook is finishing drawing a Chinese dragon when Mijoo opens the door without knocking. Again. He puts the pen down, rubbing his eyes. It's monday, a slow monday, not much work, and he had hoped it would stay that way until closing time. It's summer and Jungkook hates summer. He hates the heat, he hates being drenched in sweat, and he hates the fact that he can do nothing about it. Because working in the summer is terrible. Summer makes him lazy, makes him want to bathe in a tub full of iced water and not get out until he turns into a raisin and october comes. It makes him irritable. Summer makes him annoyed by people -like Mijoo, even if he loves her to death- and himself.

"I got a girl here who wants a nipple piercing, her first piercing by the way, so get your shit ready and bla bla bla. Straight titanium barbell. Also, don't flirt and don't be creepy. She almost ran away when I told her a male was going to be touching and piercing her tit, be mindful of that. She's too cute, if you want to get her number you should wait until it's done. I think that's it. I'll bring her in in a minute."

Mijoo leaves as fast as she talks, but Jungkook is already used to it. He's already used to the headaches her mouth causes too. He sighs before standing up, tying his too-long raven hair into the best bun he can manage. He washes his hands, sets the table up, sits on the chair and puts the gloves on. He's too busy sterilizing the jewerly when Mijoo comes back with you.

"Alright, my babies. I'll leave you to it." she turns to you. "He'll explain everything, from how the process will be to how to take care of it after it's done." she leaves before saying bye, closing the door behind her, and then he finally turns to you.

Your eyes meet and suddenly everything stops. He almost drops the sterilizing machine, his whole body tensing, going into panic mode as he recognizes you immediatly. His hands shake.

Of course he does. Of course he recognizes his high school crush. The too goody two shoes, too pretentious and too rich, too good for everybody and, most importantly, 'too good for Jeon Jungkook' girl of his high school dreams. Of course he recognizes the girl he had confessed his stupid crush to when he was sixteen. Of course he recognizes the girl who rejected and broke his young and foolish heart when he was a dumb teenager.

It doesn't matter that six years have passed ever since. He still knows every lock of your hair like the palm of his hand. He still remembers the shape of your lips and the exact shade of your eyes. He can still identify the body he fantasized about -and jacked off to- when he was a hormonal teen, now filled in all the right places. Now a grown woman.

Just one look at you after years and years of pining is enough to almost make him faint. And grow a boner under his jeans.

And by the look on your face, your eyes wide and your mouth agape, you recognize him as well.

Dammit.

He schools his features and clears his throat. Forces his body to relax and compose himself, because he's not a teenager anymore. He's also a grown man, who has matured, who now has much more experience with women than he did back then. He had already embarrased himself enough when he was sixteen to be doing it all over again. You're just another attractive girl in a sea of attractive women.

He turns to you. You still haven't said anything. Neither has he.

"Um, you can sit on the table." he manages, motioning to the set up in front of him. He watches you taking doubtful steps until you're sitting down, your eyes avoiding his gaze. He almost forgot you were here to get pierced. Holy shit, you were here to get pierced. To get your nipple pierced.

You're a professional, Jungkook. You can do this, Jungkook. You've seen boobs before, Jungkook. You've pierced nipples before, Jungkook.

Clearing his throat again and forcing his hands to stay by his side, he speaks. "The... The top." your gaze finds his, like a puppy about to get scolded. You look at your top, realization dawning on you. "You don't have to take it off. You can just pull it down."

So you do, pulling the straps of the white tank top down and dragging the fabric down with trembling fingers. No bra. Jungkook gulps as your breasts comes into vision. As perfect as he had imagined years ago. His cock twitches. Round, full, perky and so damn inviting he has to hold himself back from latching onto one nipple with his mouth around it and swirling his tongue over the nub until you're a pretty, moaning, little mess on his piercing tabl-

He closes his eyes for just a second before reminding himself to act like the 23 year old Jungkook he's tried so hard to become. The confident, assured Jungkook he is.

"Okay, this is how it'll go. First I'll clean it and scrub it to get rid of any bacteria." he's so glad he hasn't stuttered yet. 23 year old Jungkook doesn't stutter like 17 year old Jungkook. He's also glad he can pick the alcohol bottle and the surgical scrub without trembling. When he faces you again, you're watching his motions with your lip caught between your teeth. That has him swallowing the lump in his throat.

Making eye contact with him again, you take a deep breath and offer a small nod, so he gets to work. He can show you and himself he's a grown man. A grown man who can pierce a nipple without appearing like it's the first time he's seen a boob in his life. The sooner he does it, the sooner it's over.

Jungkook wets the paper towel with alcohol before carefully wiping over your nub with it. Your back arches, probably from the cold feeling, he guesses. He rubs it a few times before throwing it in the trash can nearby. He avoids looking at how enticing the soft peak is salluting him when he reaches for the marker. He doesn't say anything when he dots it with it, jaw clenched and his dick painfully stiff.

"Lay back." his voice low as he commands, turning away to get the clamp. When he slides closer, he tries to ignore the view: you, with your hair sprawled and your sweaty, shiny skin and your eyes focused on the cieling, nipple fully erect, like the star of one of his most erotic dreams. He extends his free gloved hand before he can stop himself, fingers carefully working the nub until he's sure it's painfully hard. Almost as hard as he is.

You gasp, your back arching again. He stills and looks at you, your cheeks flushed pink. Probably from the heat, he guesses again. Or at least that's what he tells himself. He can't stop himself from wondering how responsive would you be in a different setting, most likely his bed while his teeth play with your breast and his cock dives into-

"You okay?" he studies your face, your eyes not meeting his and instead still focusing on the white ceiling.

"Mhm." you reply with a small voice.

"Relax, alright? It'll be over soon." his voice is as gentle as he can, his fingers mindlessly caressing your breast to try to soothe your nerves. Or maybe it's just because he's a selfish bastard. Whatever it is, he forces himself to bring the clamp to your nipple, securing it around it.

"Take a few deep breaths. This will only take a second of pain and then it will go away." He misses the way your mouth falls open, but he doesn't miss the way your eyes squeeze tight as the needle goes in.

"Ah!" he definitely doesn't miss that either. He goes rigid for a second, because that didn't fucking sound like a cry of painfulness. It's breathy, and whiny, not too loud and, for fucks sake, if that's how you sound when you're getting fucked, he swears to God-

He feels your heartbeat under his hands when he puts the barbell in and then the bandage over it. He takes a look at you, chest moving up and down. And then you take a look at him and what he sees is almost enough to take you right there.

Reddened cheeks, drops of sweat framing your face and those eyes glazed with something he's seen too much in the women he's fucked throughout his life. They're half lidded, mascara adorning your long lashes and almost smudged, looking right through him.

"Jungkook..." and your voice, as you say his name -acknowledging him for the first time since you stepped into his shop, for the first time since you were sixteen-, it's hoarse, almost inaudible, like you just came all over his-

He's on his feet in an instant like he's been burned. "It may bleed for the first week, and it can be really sore. The swelling will eventually come down." he's quickly tidying up the table, a bottle in his hand that he hands to you without looking directly. "Wash it gently with this soap and warm water once per day. Don't touch it. Wear a comfortable...bra. If it gets crusty, clean it with saline. Not alcohol or any other thing you might clean a wound with. The soap I just gave you or saline. Nothing else."

He's pacing around the room as he takes his gloves off and throws them in the trash bin, too agressively maybe, then he keeps rambling, like he's hurriedly trying to make you leave as soon as possible. "Avoid pools and the sea. It takes about six months to a year to heal, so don't... don't touch it, don't play with it or..." he clears his throat, "don't let anyone else play with it. And if it gets infected, come back immediately and I'll take a look at it." which he honestly hopes it won't happen. When he faces you, your top is back on and you're getting off the table.

"Alright, um...I'll do that." clearing your throat, your hand gripping the doorknob. "Thank you."

But right before you can exit the room, Jungkook says your name.

"_____." when you turn around to face him, it takes a few seconds for him to make eye contact from across the room. "It was good to see you."

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"Let me see!"

It's the first thing Chaelin says when she opens the door to her appartment. It's on the second floor, small enough to compare it to most expensive appartments you'd stayed in throughout your life, but big enough for Chaelin, her cat and her -impressive- collection of acrylic nail kits and pairs of high heels. It's also big enough for her to offer you the only guest room until summer is over so you didn't have to, one, stay at your parents' place, and two, find an appartment in a short period of time for a short period of time.

When you left years ago, you did so with the thought of 'never looking back'. You never really expected to return here, of all places. Maybe visit your best friend for a weekend at most, have dinner with your parents on a saturday and then go back to the new life you'd made for yourself on a sunday.

But that was before you'd caught Adam cheating.

Tale as old as time: childhood sweethearts get engaged, move in together, son of a bitch sleeps with the assistand he told his girlfriend not to worry about, and then the brokenhearted girl packs her bags and leaves the cheating bastard begging for her to come back.

You'd be lying if you said you were surprised.

Throughout your life, you'd learned to expect many things, regardless of being sheltered and babied by your family since you were born. Watched too much Maury and Dr.Phil. Too much Gossip Girl to know what the deal with life really is.

So, thankfully, you'd only shed a few tears, mostly because your ego and self steem were slightly triggered. You'd realize long before that your feelings for Adam started to disappear once he popped the question and you said yes. Your love story began as teenagers but soon after graduating, the two of you went on different paths: you'd matured, grown into your twenties while he got stuck at 17 and never stopped acting as such.

So yeah, whatever, break ups are hard. But they're not as hard when the love is gone and the sole reason to stay with your partner is to please your parents. You were also right when you expected your mom to tell you to 'forgive and forget' because 'those things just happen, it's not a big deal, honey'.

But above all things, the last thing you expected to happen when you came back was to show your tits and get pierced by none other than motherfucking Jeon Jungkook.

Jeon Jungkook. Guk. Gukkie. Jeongukkie.

The lanky nerd with braces, glasses and an anime obsession much bigger than his hentai obsession, which is saying a lot. The shy, awkward classmate who'd stuttered his undying crush for you when you were just kids. That one who you had rudely rejected like the bitch you used to be in high school.

But my God, Jeon Jungkook was anything but a kid now.

You were shocked. You were gagged. Couldn't seem to fathom what was happening and what your eyes were seeing. It took you a while to close your mouth when you realized JK was Guk. Gukkie. Jeongukkie.

With messy black hair, a smoldering gaze free of glasses, piercings adorning both ears, and his right eyebrow,, the braces long gone showing perfectly straight - but still bunny like- teeth. The clothes he wore were loose, all black, but it was impossible not to notice the muscles of his back and arms, covered with tattoos from his hands to his forearms. You'd bet there were more of them underneath the fabric.

It was awkward at first. You didn't know what to do, or what to say. Didn't know if he rememberd you. So you chose to stay quiet while your body chose to react like it had never been in the presence of an attractive young man in it's entire life.

And oh, did it react.

He was reluctant, his old timid demeanor peeking through his newly adopted persona. But as soon as those hands came in contact with your skin, your whole body was lit on fire. Like you were 16 and losing your virginity over again and it was the first time a dude touched your boobs.

There shouldn't have been anything erotic about it -besides the fact that your entire breasts were exposed-, it should've been just a professional procedure. But those gloved fingers touched and pinched and suddenly you were too aware of Jeon Jungkook and the way you were starting to sweat profously, not due to the heat of the season.

You tried to distract yourself by looking at the cieling and not at his gorgeous face. Tried to avoid thinking about Jeon Jungkook and how his mouth would feel wrapped around you. Tried not to think about the way your panties were a second skin to your folds, and how tempted you were to grind your hips until you recieved some sort of friction with the jean fabric of your shorts. You wonder if he noticed you squeezing your thighs together. You hope not.

And then the needle happened. You never thought of yourself as a particularly kinky person. Sex with Adam was boring for the most part and you'd lost your libido for a long time. Stopped thinking about sex altogether. But the pain. The pain mixed with his hand rubbing soothing circles on your breast and his voice, as sweet as honey, guiding you through it. It made you reconsider a lot of things you'd once dismissed as 'weird' or 'deviant'

You swear you almost came right on his table.

And then your eyes connected, you made the mistake of calling his name like a satisfied woman who still needed more, and it was all gone. He stood up like a scared cat, gave you a bunch of explanations about the aftercare that you barely grasped without even looking at you and pretty much rushed you to leave.

So you walked, all the way from the tattoo parlor to Chaelin's appartment, mortified, and completely humilliated.

"Are you gonna let me see or not?" your friend says expectantly as you finally sit down after chugging a glass of iced water. You sigh, placing the glass on the table before carefully pulling down your top. "Oh my God, it looks so cool!" she gasps and you can't help a smile while she studies it in amazement. "Did it hurt?"

"Um, I guess." you keep out the part where you almost orgasmed, obviously, stopping her hand from touching when she reaches towards you. "Wait, no. He said something about not touching it for like six months or a year, I don't remember."

At that, Chaelin's eyebrows quirk up. "He? It was a he? Was he cute, at least?"

"You won't believe this..." looking away for a few seconds, you take a deep breath. "It was Jeon Jungkook."

There's a pause, a silence that fills the room when Chaelin's jaw drops. "Jeon Jungkook...pierced your nipple?"

You close your eyes, bracing yourself for what you're a hundred percent sure is coming.

"Ha..." there it is. "Ha ha..." you still know there's more. "Ha ha ha..."

Chaelin laughs hysterically for about God knows how long, while you keep drinking your glass of water unfaced, your mind drifting back to Guk. Gukkie. Jeongukkie, his tattoos and his stupid gloved hands.

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You know he's here.

Everything was cool, you were doing alright, having a great time with your vodka sprite in hand and your cute white bikini on. Chaelin was by your side, the guys were excited to have you back and thankfully, you'd avoided most questions about Adam and they'd avoided digging too deep into the topic. You'd sunbathed the whole afternoon, kept away from the water like he'd told you and ate the Hawaiian pizza Yoongi insisted on ordering despite Namjoon's and Jimin's complaints.

It's at night, when you're a little tipsy and your cheeks are flushed, that you feel it. You'd barely noticed Taehyung disappearing to let in a new guest.

You don't see him, but you feel him.

You're sitting on the pool tile steps, legs dangling and the water baely reaching your belly to make sure it doesn't touch your very sensitive and newly pierced nipple. Your back is facing the sliding glass doors of Hoseok's house, but the moment you hear his voice, smooth but animated as he converses with Taehyung, your body wakes up immediately, back straightening, goosebumps forming on your arms and nipples tightening against the fabric of your two piece.

You don't turn around, instead opting for downing the remaining of your drink and coming to the realization that, of course, Taehyung, social butterfly who'd always got along with everybody and remained friends with most people from high school, still keeps in touch with Jungkook.

You ignore him when he enters the pool, still peering from the corner of your eyes while pretending to be engaged in Chaelin's and Jihyo's conversation. Your mind sabotages you by taking you to that day a week ago at the tattoo parlor.

To the warmth of his hand, to the few strands of hair that his small ponytail couldn't keep together, to the way his eyes focused on such an intimate part of your body, to the endless ink decorating his skin, to-

Great. Now your bottoms are wet and not due to the water.

You don't miss Chaelin supressing a laugh and her not so subtle elbowing. You glance at her in warning and try to keep calm for the next fifteen minutes until Jin proposes moving to the living room to watch a movie.

"I'm gonna stay here for a little longer, guys." you say, after clearing your throat. You needed some time to gather yourself before being in a confined space with Jungkook.

"Are you sure?" Jin stops by your side to place a hand on your shoulder as everybody starts exiting the pool. "It's Mean Girls! You love Mean Girls! You never miss a minute of Mean Girls!"

Rolling your eyes, you wave him dismissively. "I know every dialogue on Mean Girls like the back of my hand, I think I'll be alright, Jin."

When everybody finally leaves, you take a deep breath, covering your face with your hands in an attempt to get him out of your head. Damn Jeon Jungkook and his irresisitble glow up.

"You okay?"

The unexpected voice startles you, a gasp finding its way out of your mouth and causing you to jump on your seat, heartbeat erratic as you instantly recognize who it belongs to. Your hand grasps your chest as if that would do anything to protect yourself against him.

"Shit, don't do that!" you say, the words almost getting stuck in your throat as you see him approaching you, still submerged in the pool. The more he nears you, the less water depth there is and the more visible his torso comes into view. Wich was exactly what you'd been avoiding.

Because Jeon Jungkook was ripped, as you'd imagined when you first encountered him.

Broad shoulders and strong biceps and chiseled abs and veiny forearms. Drenched hair, a full sleeve of tattoos and water dripping from delicious tan skin and all just so very hard. That paired up with a loopsided smile that does nothing but make you shudder.

"Sorry." he doesn't sound apologetic at all when he says that, the smirk adorning his features telling. "You just seemed a little off." you advert your gaze when he pushes his hair back.

"I'm fine, just...just wanted to be by myself."

"Oh" Jungkook's smile disappears. "I can leave, if you want me t-"

"No!" you're not sure where that comes from and neither does he, judging by the look on his face when your eyes find his. Eyebrows raised and mouth slightly parted, he's as surprised as you and there's an awkward silence for a few seconds. "Um, you don't have to. I mean, it's not my house, you can do whatever you want." you sniff and tame your voice, trying to seem cool and collected like you didn't just practically beg him not to go.

Ironic, considering this was exactly what you had been fearing for the past thirty minutes.

And then he smiles. A knowing smile. A smile that says 'you just totally checked me out and now you don't want me to leave'. A smile that you would have never associated with Jeon Jungkook of all people years ago. A smile that makes you want to look away but still keeps you in place.

"Sure." he says, closing the space between the two of you slowly but still leaving enough distance. "So, how's it going?"

You clear your throat, head high and determined not to let this man, or any man for that matter, turn you into a trembling mess. You're still you and you're not easily shaken by the opposite sex. Or at least that's what you helplessly chant in your head.

"Everything's cool. I'm on summer vacation now," a little white lie, "so I decided to-"

"The piercing." he says, the smile never leaving his face. "I meant how's the piercing."

"The pier- right." you almost miss the step he takes forward, all too aware of his height over yours but thankful for the centimeters that being propped on the stairs added to yours. "It's-" you almost, almost miss his knee touching your knee and him slightly separating your legs with his own inch by inch. Or how your thighs open unvoluntarely to welcome him in and how you can barely find coherent words to speak. "It's doing-" or the way his smile disappears and is instead focusing his dark stare fully onto yours.

"It's doing well." you finally say in a whisper, not being able to bring yourself to be louder.

He hums. "May I see it?" Jungkook wets his lips with the tip of his tongue and the action and his voice is enough to make you nod your head, bewitched.

His movements are unhurried, his hand coming up to tentatively come in contact with the flesh of your clavicle. His fingers skim through your skin upwards, his touch is feather-like when it wraps around your throat. You pant, and he stops but he doesn't move away, his eyes still focused on yours, studying you, daring you to pull back, to tell him to back off. But just a simple touch of his and you're fully under his control. It reminds you too much of the day you got that damn piercing.

Your lips are parted and for a moment he stays just like that. His body so close to yours but not close enough, and his hand slightly gripping your neck. Your pussy clenches around nothing and you can't wrap your head around the fact that something so simple sets your entire being alive and leaves you aching.

Then, as slow as he started, his hand travels from the front of your neck to the back, pushing your hair aside to carefully untie the straps of your bikini. He breathes through his nostrils, doesn't make a sound. He seems so collected it's starting to annoy you.

Instead, your breathing is ragged when the top falls down, exposing both your breasts to him. That's when he removes his eyes from yours and his jaw clenches. Your nipples perk up under his gaze, like they remember him and the effect he had on them just a week ago. You're at least glad you're not the only one affected but he seems to be a master at keeping it under wraps.

Then, his hand moves again, leaving goosebumps on your skin as it goes south. Jungkook takes his time, so deliberate you want to scream, until he's cupping your pierced breast, keeping away from the nipple just like he'd advised you a few days prior. You can't look away from his face, from his eyes observing you like you're a full course meal and he's been starving for days. You feel drops of water falling from his hair to your thighs, his thumb caressing your skin so delicately as it faintly nears your still tender nipple. Just nearing it, never touching it.

"Beautiful." his murmur is almost imperceptible and for a moment you think you've imagined it. Your back arches on its own, breast pushed against the palm of his hand, almost like your body is begging him to come closer, to touch you more, to feel you all over. He meets your eyes briefly, gauging your reaction, before going back to your chest. Suddenly, the grip on your breast tightens, fingers ever so softly squeezing your flesh. From your throat comes a mewl, your eyes shut and your legs close around his waist.

"Jungkook, please..." you whisper when you open your eyes. He looks at you, unvertainty written all over his face, lips bruised as if he had been biting on them too hard, gaze as glassy as yours. And just like that, the spell is broken. He blinks and his expression changes completely. Lips forming a straight line and jaw tight. His hand retracts, fixing your bikini top over your breasts before tying it around your neck like it originally was. Meanwhile your eyebrows crunch in confusion. But when you're about to start asking questions, he clears his throat.

"It's healing okay." he steps back, avoiding your eyes. "I'll see you inside."

Jungkook leaves the pool like nothing happened.

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Jungkook is fiddling, fixing the position of his glasses and combing through his straight hair with shaky hands, habits he's tried so hard to get rid of in his sixteen years of existence but still finds impossible to.

He can't help it. He's always been like this: the quiet and awkward kid in class who sits in the back, a misunderstood puppy in a sea of stronger dog breeds that could eat him alive. An outcast. Too geeky for his own good. Notebokes full of Dragon Ball doodles on the margins of the pages, the shelves in his room stacked with Marvel figurines, and a closet filled with outdated clothes that he has been inheriting from his older brother.

He has never been the type to stand out, always being overlooked by people like he's invisible. He doesn't mind though. He'd much rather be ignored than getting picked on by bullies like he used to in elementary school.

He never gets invited to parties. Ever. He's a nobody who barely speaks, and when he does he either stutters or manages to embarrass himself in one way or another. He's seen the look on people's faces when they look at him. Their eyes seem to scream 'weirdo' everytime he gets acknowledged.

So obviously the only reason he was invited to this particular party had a first and last name: Kim Taehyung. The only kid in Jungkook's entire life who didn't look at him in a funny way, the only kid who took the time to entangle in a random conversation with him after class and who seemed geniune enough to make Jungkook feel comfortable.

He's not sure how it happened, since Taehyung mostly hangs out with the cool kids. But somehow it did, and now Jungkook is uncomfortably standing in a living room full of drunk teens, looking directly at you.

You, the one girl Jungkook had been pining on for God knows how long. You, who are obviously too pretty, too popular, and way out of his league. You, with your plaid skirt and your polo shirt and those legs that never seem to end. You, who are sitting with your friends in a couch, drink in hand and visibly tipsy. And yet, he doesn't think he's ever seen anyone pull of the 'drunk-rosy-cheek' look better than you.

He can hear your laugh through the music and he already thinks it sounds better than whoever is playing in the background.

"Come on, Gukkie! Her friends are leaving and she's all by herself now! It's your chance" Taehyung's obviously drunk too because it took Jungkook a while to decypher his exact words. He'd disappeared for a while and now that he's back, he's pushing Jungkook in your direction.

"This was a mistake, Taehyung." Jungkook shakes his hair and steps back, quickly glancing at the front door to prepare his escape. But his new friend's grip on his hoodie keeps him in place.

"Guk, listen. The only thing you have to do, is walk up to her, and say 'hey I think you're, like, really pretty. Just letting you know. Bye!' That's it. Jung- Dude, Guk, seriously, look at me." Taehyung grabs Jungkook's cheeks, squishing them between his hands and forceing him to face him. "You've been crushing hard on her for years, my man. We're graduating and you won't see each other again. What's the worst thing that can happen? Getting rejected?"

Jungkook's eyebrows draw together. "Um, yeah?"

"Exactly! Getting rejected is not the end of the world, bro! It just means keep trying on other girls!" Taehyung releases his hold on Jungkook's cheeks. "I just think you're going to regret not telling your crush she's your crush. Who knows? Maybe in the future you two will get married."

Jungkook snickers, muttering a 'yeah right' under his breath. Still, he can't help the smile that Taehyung's words always seem to pull out of him.

"Now," Taehyung playfully slaps Jungkook before turning him in your direction again. "Go get 'em, tiger!"

"Okay," Mijoo's voice slices through Jungkook's memories. She's sitting on Jungkook's desk, munching on her brownies and looking at her coworker expectantly. "And then what?"

He sighs, running a hand through his hair, sits back on his chair, already feeling the effects of Mijoo's baked goods. "And then I walked up to her, like a damn fool, stutter and all. And I say:" he clears his throat, making an effort to do his best teenage Gukkie impression."'Hey, _____, um, so, I think you're beautiful and I've had a crush on you since seventh grade, haha, just wanted to let you know.'"

Mijoo rolls her eyes, still chewing. "And then what?"

"And then she looked me up and down, giggled, fucking giggled, Mijoo, and said 'Who are you, again?'" Mijoo gasps and Jungkook closes his eyes, trying to force that recollecion out of his head.

"What a bitch." she can't help but laugh before apologizing. Jungkook merely shrugs his shoulders and takes another bite of his brownie. "She didn't say anything else?"

"She said something along the lines of:" he clears his throat again, this time, doing an impression of you. "'That's sweet and all but, you and I... we're not the same. And I have a boyfriend, so...' She said that like I didn't know, like I wasn't aware of the school's it couple! Like I was dumb!"

Mijoo nods. "And now you want to fuck her even more than you did in high school."

"I- No! Well, yes. Fuck, of course I want to sleep with her! But I just... can't."

"Why not?"

"Did you hear anything about what I just told you or were you too concentrated trying to get high?"

It's Mijoo's turn to roll her eyes. "I heard everything you just told me. I just don't understand what the problem is. You two were sixteen. Sure, she was a bitch about it, but Lord knows I've been a bitch my entire life and now I'm not anymore." Jungkook raises an eyebrow at that. "Okay, sometimes I can be nice. But the point is..." Mijoo finishes her piece of brownie before getting off of Jungkook's desk. "It's been, what? Nine? Ten years? People change, JK. You're the best example of that. You want to fuck her and she obviously wants to fuck you too. You're both adults." she wipes her hands on her shorts. "I think it's time you fulfill that high school fantasy of yours."

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You've made up your mind.

And by you, it means Chaelin has made up your mind.

It didn't take long to convince you though. That last interaction with Jungkook cause too many emotions stirring within you. It left you hot, it left you bothered, it left you confused. Sure, it also left you a little bit embarrassed like the first time, but above everything else, that interaction with Jungkook left you absolutely livid.

Because who the fuck did Jeon Jungkook, formerly known as Guk, Gukkie, Jungukkie, and currently known as JK, think he was to come near you, speed your heart rate's up, and then runaway like that?

You've spent days thinking about it. About that face, about that body, about those hands and- shit. You're doing it again.

You've spent days trying to push those intrusive thoughts. Spent days trying to bury what happened. You've spent days trying to keep quiet, not telling anyone about it and just wishing that stupid spark of desire simply went away.

But it has just been simply unavoidable. You haven't been able to ignore the sleepless nights with your brain drifting back to that night and forbidding your hand from slipping under your panties. Or the excessive amount of time during the day where images of him suddenly popped in your head and wouldn't go away, even with you squeezing your thighs to try to make the ache go away.

So you ended up ranting and ranting and ranting to the only person you could confide on, who is obviously your best friend. Your best friend, who's too smart for her own good and knows you too well for your liking. Because apparently your moodiness and snappy remarks couldn't go unnoticed.

And after explaining the fiasco over a bottle of wine -and minutes of endless laughing on Chaelin's part because, again, it's Gukkie you two were talking about and, according to her, this was "the most karmic thing I've ever seen"-, she gave you the best advice an older sister could ever give.

"Fuck him."

"I know right? Fuck him!"

"No. I mean, fuck him."

And now here you are. Right inside that room you stepped in weeks ago, confronting the man in question with the same confidence that has always distinguished you from others and trying to act like the fluttering inside your belly wasn't nauseauting.

"A date."

"Yes."

"You want to go on a date with me." this wouldn't be so hard if Jungkook didn't look so delectable in a plain white t-shirt and ripped jeans. You cross your arms over your chest, doing your best to not look down at the exposed skin of a man who obviously worked out a lot and apparently, never skipped leg day. "What's the catch?"

He's sitting on his chair, back resting comfortably and legs spread, narrowing his eyes at you and probably wondering why the girl at the front desk let you in without an appointment. Also, probably wondering if there was a catch to all of this.

"There's no catch. I just want to go to the fair this weekend. I'll ask Taehyung for your number and text you the date and the exact place we'll be meeting. Unless..." your quirk one of your eyebrows. "Unless you're already planning on how you'll chicken out this time."

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Of course, Jungkook says yes to going on a date with his high school crush but spends the following days overthinking every single thing.

He can't help but feel like it's kinda sketchy. What if you're planning your vendetta on him? What if you don't even show up and he ends up there looking like a damn idiot? What if you hate him and are just messing up with him? What if that incident in high school is going to repeat itself?

"If she doesn't show up, you simply move on and never speak to her again. It's that simple. She can't have that much power over you to cry about something like that." Mijoo had said that same day she let you in the tattoo parlor after you'd asked to see Jungkook. Jungkook's coworker hadn't even question you and just motioned you to Jungkook's room with a knowing smile on her face. Later that day, Jungkook had scolded her about it and she'd simply shrugged.

He considers cancelling, eyes reading the 'won't be able to make it, sorry (sad face emoji)' over and over again and fingers hovering over the send button so many times he's lost count. But then he remembers that comment of yours about him chickening out and Jungkook starts seeing red.

How couldn't you understand he's just terrified of you rejecting him one more time? Sure, Jungkook is now an adult who doesn't get butthurt over stuff like that. He's experienced too much after graduating from high school and he's a much stronger individual than his fragile self back was back then.

But something about you just makes him feel so... weak.

He still finds it impossible to concieve where he got the courage to approach you like that at Taehyung's pool, or how he brought himself to touch you for longer than a minute without coming in his pants. He'd enjoyed it too much. Allowing him to see you so exposed, just for him. He'd be so tempted to kiss you right there and then, to run his hands up and down your thighs and fully wrap your legs around him to let you known how much you'd affected him. Once you called his name, it was like he'd finally snapped out of it and backed away like he'd been burned by you. He spent the next twenty minutes trying to keep himself from pulling down his pants and jerking off in his friend's bathroom.

It's terrible. Because he feels like the teenager he used to be when you're around. Shy, insecure and overall a mess. You showing up in his life after so many years and now apparenly being interested in him seems like a dream that he's not sure he wants to keep being in or wake up from before it's too late and he falls back into that tumoltuous longing that will inevitably end up in heartbreak. His heartbreak.

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It's saturday night, he's standing by himself in the crowded fair at the spot. You're fifteen minutes late and he's already about to turn back and dip out. He feels too awkward and the nerves are eating him alive.

You're not going to show up. You're not going to show up and now he feels and looks even dumber than the time he told you he was crushing on you. You're not even going to show up and now he's going to come back home, get drunk by himself and curse your name for-

"Hey!" he turns around to the sound of your voice and sees you running towards him. "Sorry I'm late! I couldn't find my phone and spent like thirty minutes looking for it. Turns out, Sharon Stone, was taking a nap on top of it and I didn't even notice."

"Sharon Stone?"

"Chaelin's cat."

To be honest, he's too surprised to process your explanation right away. He might also be a little speechless because that sky blue sundress looks too good on your skin and your eyelashes are so long, framing your beautiful eyes, and your lips are all glossy and kisseable that it takes him a while to find his own voice.

He clears his throat. "It's alright." scratching the back of his head, he momentarely adverts his gaze from you in an attempt to not get distracted by how soft your hair looks and how much he wants to wrap it around his hands in a ponytail. "Um, where do you want to go first?"

≿━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━༺❀༻━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━≾

Almost an hour and a half later, when the sun has already disappeared and you're both surrounded by colorful lights, Jungkook decides to buy the both of you hot dogs and a drink and you both settle down on a bench.

You've been walking all over the fair, going from booth to booth, playing any game in sight Jungkook dared you to -he obviously had a competitive streak-: from the ballon and dart games, to the shooting games, to the bumping cars, to the ball-in-basket one. To say you were having fun was an understatement.

You'd almost regretted setting the date up. You were sure he wouldn't even show up and if he did, you were scared of how awkward things could get between the two of you. And if things were awkward, you were sure it would only take less than thirty minutes for the both of you to part ways and never talk again about such failure of a date.

To your surprise, none of that happened.

The conversation was flowing, both of you acting like you were strangers on their first date getting to know each other, which, to be fair, that's exactly what it felt like. There was a slight banter, teasing each other when one of you lost in whatever game you were playing while the other was obviously winning. There were laughs and a funny feeling in your tummy whenever you'd walk side by side and his arm brushed yours.

There was no stiffness on his shoulders, no mention of the past or your previous encounters, no acknowledgement of the blatant sexual tension you'd experienced before, not an ounce of avoidance whenever your eyes met his and he was even sure of himself enough to place a hand on your lower back or briefly interwine your fingers with his to guide you through the mass of people.

It felt like you'd both unspokenly agreed on making each other feel comfortable enough to have a good time.

"I didn't think you were going to show up, to be honest." you suddenly say, taking a sip of your strawberry juice and thankful to finally let your feet rest for a while.

Jungkook looks at you, hot dog mid air and eyebrows almost disappearing into his hairline. "You didn't think I was going to show up? I didn't think you were going to show up." you simply shrug, lowering your gaze seepishly, the beginning of a smile on both your faces. He surprises you by tilting your head in his direction with his forefinger. You watch him watching you, a little dazed, a little lost in how his dark hair messily falls over his forehead and his equally dark eyes study your face, his thumb swiping over your lower lip. "You um... There was ketchup right there." he lies.

"Oh" you say, feeling your face heating up. "Thanks. Red doesn't really match this dress." you manage a smile and tuck a lock of your hair behind your ear.

At that, he eyes your dress for a moment, mouth slightly ajar. He's debating on whether or not to say something but you beat him to it.

"I'm sorry, by the way."

"For being late? I already told you it's fin-"

"No." you shake your head. "For... that time when we were young and I was such a concieted brat." you say, looking away , trying to find anything else that's not his pretty face. "I thought I was a queen bee back then. I was annoying and rude, specially to you. I..." you lick your lips. The cherry glittery gloss was already gone. "I thought it was cute, what you said. There was no reason for me to act like that. I know this doesn't make anything right but..." when you turn to face him again, there's still the same expression on his face. "I'm sorry."

A few seconds go by before it's him who's shaking his head. "It's okay. It was a long time ago, anyway." he smiles at you, although it doesn't reach his eyes and seems sorta forced. You sigh, and he takes your hand. "Let's go to the ferris wheel."

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tell you're tense. You're sitting right beside him in the ferris cabin, your back is all straight, you're facing forward and he believes you haven't blinked for what feels like an eternity. He thinks it has everything to do with your conversation a few minutes ago. You were probably not content with his response but what could Jungkook do? There was really no point in apologizing for something that happened years ago, but at the same time, he didn't want to hold anything against you like a resentful asshole because it was really not who he was. But there was still a little bit of stingyness inside of him and he didn't know how to make it go away.

At the end of the day, here you were, on a date with him that you'd asked for, getting along and asking questions about him and laughing at his jokes and trying to start all over again.

But then the ferris wheel starts moving, and he finally understands why you look so uncomfortable.

It's the way you immediately grip his forearm, nails digging in his skin and he swears he hears the smallest gasp forcing itself out your throat.

"Are you... scared?" he tentatively asks.

You say nothing for a while, not moving an inch. He would laugh if you didn't look so pained about it.

"I don't like small confined spaces nor rollercoasters." you finally say through gritted teeth.

"It's not really that small and ferris wheels are not rollercoasters. " your nails dig deeper and he winces. "Okay, okay. You don't like small confined spaces nor rollercoasters, and that includes ferris wheels. So why didn't you tell me?"

"I don't know. I've never liked ferris wheels but you seemed excited about it, so..."

There's a silence after that in the environment, neither of you exactly sure of what to say or how to act. Until Jungkook moves one of his hands hands until it's resting on the one who's holding onto him for dear life, fingers caressing yours. The warmth of his hand spreads through yours and although it's almost July and you can already feel your sweaty back staining your dress, it's oddly comforting. What's more comforting even, is him twisting his body towards you and talking with the calmest and most soothing tone you've ever heard.

"Look at me." you do instantly, unwillingly, and kinda wish you hadn't. It's almost as if your body will do anything he says without question. Like he has some sort of power over it to just react however he wants. His eyes bore into yours and suddenly the cab doesn't seem so suffocating. "It's just you and me right now. We're not even on a ferris wheel." the corners of his mouth turn slowly upwards. You zone out the environment, suddenly too aware of him and how close he is and how loud the beating of your heart is to your own ears.

"Jungkook."

You swallow the knot in the back of your throat when he removes his hand from yours. It almost makes you protest, - now realizing you've losened the tight grip on his arm- , before it craddles your face, keeping you in place while bringing his body closer.

"You have to stop saying my name like that."

With his thigh touching your thigh, your whole demeanor melts. When he leans closer, and you feel his breath fanning over your lips, your eyes shut closed.

"Tell me I can-" he starts to say.

"Yes." you finish for him. He doesn't doubt on closing the distance between you two. His lips touch yours and your body shakes in excitement. It's just him lightly skimming your lips with his but it's already too much and at the same time, not enough. It has you deepening it, yourself moving closer when he kisses you again. It has you relaxing against him, the tenseness prior disappearing and making you arch your back when his tongue asks for permission.

But it's exactly then, the moment you open your lips to him, that has you losing your mind.

The sparks fly, traveling from your head to your toes and then settling on the pit of your stomach as soon as the kiss starts to turn desperate and rough. When he nibbles your lips with his teeth, it makes you mewl and whine and your nipples tight against the cotton of your dress. It makes the metal barbell to feel uncomfortable, slightly painful. And when he goes back to being messy and filthy with his tongue tangled with yours, your thighs close on their own.

He forces himself to pull his hand back and bring it down, finding the parting of yd opening them for him. "Wait," you say, your fingers wrapping around his forearm as you try to catch your breath."The ferris-" he shuts you up with another kiss.

"We're not on a ferris wheel." he reminds you, a soft whisper against your mouth. And for whatever reason, you believe him.

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"He fingered you on the ferris wheel."

"Yes."

"And you came before the ride was over."

You take a small sip of wine, your eyes focusing on the TV where a rerun of the Golden Girls is playing, although, to be fair, lately you haven't been able to pay much attention to anything else but a certain brunet with doe eyes and kisseable lips. "Yes."

She hums, stealing a handful of popcorn from the bowl between your thighs.

"How long did it took? Like five minutes?"

There's a pause in which you clench your jaw, your fingers twitching around the glass in your hand, and then you answer. "Probably less."

There's another pause, and then-

"Ha...Ha ha...Ha ha ha-"

You let her laugh. It's okay. You knew you had it coming.

Chaelin knows the pillow you throw right at her face is also something she had coming.

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It's not that you're mad.

Jungkook and you had a great time on that fair date, he made you laugh, bought hot dogs and drinks for the two of you and got you off inside the cab of a ferris wheel on record time with those magical, long fingers of his. Technically, there shouldn't be anything to be angry about.

Except it's been a week and you can't stop thinking about him, about wanting more, and about those words that he left you with after the ferris wheel ride ended, when you had tried to return the favor.

'Next time, maybe.'

And there hasn't been a next time.

The thought of texting him or giving him a call to ask for another date is persistent in your mind. It remains while you do the laundry or wash the dishes, while you shower, while you eat or while you spend your days at the beach with Chaelin. There's always the incessant desire to reach out towards your phone, unlock it and dial his number to beg for more.

But you'd never been one to beg, so you resist the urge everytime that feeling starts to creep up on you and it washes over you like a wave. You silence your phone and try to concentrate on making the most out of your summer.

It's one random night, when you're tiredly dragging your feet across Chaelin's apartment's carpet, yawning and ready to succumb to a well needed slumber, that you see your phone screen's lighting up with a message.

Your heart pathetically leaps inside your chest when you read his name.

'you free on saturday?'

You wish you could say you ghosted him, ignored his text and moved on with your life until it was him who begged you for another date. But the truth is you opened it in a matter of seconds and typed 'i'm free, why?' back in a rush with trembling fingers.

So now you're on the passanger seat of his car while he sits on the driver seat, the first saturday night of July, like he's Danny Zuko and you're Sandy Olsson, watching a vintage movie in a drive-in theater which plot you don't give a shit about, even if Jungkook's date plan idea made something inside of you churn with adoration.

And the only reason why you don't give a single damn about the movie playing in front of your eyes, is because you're hot. Way too hot. And the reason and cause is none other than the boy-now-turned-man sitting on your left.

You barely exchanged words when he picked you up, just rode in silence until you got to your destination and you bet he can feel as well as you do the tension in the air.

You've surveyed him a few times from the corner of his eye, noticing him fiddling with the rings around his fingers and shifting in his seat from time to time. And if the sight of his fingers bring memories that you've tried to bury to keep yourself from lunching towards him, a brief glance at his forearms, adorned with ink drawn through his golden flesh -doing a poor job at concieling the veins running underneath- and his skin-tight jeans wrapping those muscled thighs of his is enough to have you be the one squirming in your seat.

A woman can only endure so much, and you come to that realization thirty minutes into the movie.

"I want to suck your cock." you say, a stern expression on your face as you turn your body in his direction.

Jungkook frozes as your voice slides over him. It takes him a couple seconds to look at you, shock widening his eyes and parting his lips.

"Huh?" he manages, his grip on the steering wheel turning his knuckles white.

Without separating your gaze from his, you gather your hair and tie it in a ponytail with the hair tie previously around your wrist. You don't miss the quick glance he sneaks into the curvature of your neck and the valley between your breasts.

Inching forward, closing in on him, you place one of your hands on top of his thigh, the action making his whole body tense. "____..." he whispers your name in a warning that doesn't sound convincing even in his own ears.

You smile, your eyes never wavering from his as your hand inches upwards, slowly caressing over the fabric of his jeans until you finally come across what you were looking for.

His hand flies to your wrist, stilling your movements. "____, this is not-". He starts, but his voice gets stuck inside his throat when you palm his undoubtly growing erection.

"Shh." your shaky breath fans over his cheek and you force yourself on your knees on the passanger seat in a more comortable possition to stop the trembling to reach them.

You fumble with the belt holding his pants in place, then with the button and finally with the zipper. He helps you by lifting his hips to pull his jeans and boxers to his thighs and you have to bite back a mixture between a gasp and a moan at the sight below you. You haven't even seen Jeon Jungkook naked all the way, but the mere sight of his hard cock with pre-cum glistening on his crown is probably the sexiest thing you've ever had the pleasure of appreciating.

It gets sexier when you wrap your hand around the base and his body melts in the driver seat, throwing his head back with his eyes shut. It gets even sexier when you finally lower your head, swirling your tongue over the head before finally engulfing him fully in the wet warmth of your mouth.

"Shit." his voice is tight, uneven as his hand loosely grips your ponytail, as if careful not to accidentally hurt you and break the glorious moment.

Although you wouldn't mind at all. Because the moment your hands are on him, and your tongue is on his shaft, that's the only thing you care about. Your belly is twisting, an undeniable wet spot on your panties as the fabric sticks to your folds, and the more you suck Jungkook, the more you want from him. His earthy taste is addicting and the soft little whimpers he occasionally can't prevent himself from are making you want to milk him until he can't take it no more. There's this desire within you to whorship him and his cock like you had been dreaming for the past weeks.

"This is s-so fucking h-hot." he rasps between ragged breaths, the bobbing of your head, sliding up and down his dick as your hand works the centimeters your mouth can't take is about to make him faint.

"Getting a blowjob?" you joke, your throat starting to feel sore as you kiss his leaking tip.

"N-no." he draws in a rough breath when you take him all of him again. "You giving me a blowjob... T-the f-fact that anyone c-could see us..." he darts a quick glance at your body, your ass up in the air and your dress sliding down, almost exposing you completely. "The fact that-ah! Shit..." he squeezes his eyes when he feels a glob of your spit lubricating him.

There's a sudden need to make you feel the same, to touch your skin and have you shaking the same way you have him. So one of his hands travels from your spine, to your perked ass, finally dragging the cotton of your dress to allow himself to see your thin white panties. "The fact that anyone could see you l-like this," he murmurs, regaining a little bit of control when he squeezes one of your cheeks. "letting t-them see you s-sucking my cock and..." he smirks when he feels you gasping around him, his fingers trapped between your thighs and pushing them inside your heat easily "and letting them see me fingering this pretty little pussy."

Soon after that he's cumming in your mouth while you're cumming around his fingers.

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At first, it's mostly on weekends when you see each other. Weekends of stolen kisses and soft sighs and whispering against each other's lips. Then weekends turn to week days, sitting on grass while sipping on refreshing beverages, drawing each other laughs, elbows touching as you walk around the park side by side because the both of you are too scared to interwine your fingers together.

Jungkook feels content like this: sitting on the sand with you between his thighs, admiring the sunset while nuzzing your neck and inhaling your scent every now. He likes waching you enoying your strawberry ice cream, almost forgetting the chocolate chip one already melting in his hand.

"If you were an ice cream flavor,which one would you be?" you ask him, relaxing against his chest.

"Rocky road."

"Why?"

He shrugs behind you. "Everyone likes rocky road."

You hum, playfully rolling your eyes. "What about me? Which ice cream flavor would I be?"

"Lemon sherbet, in the summer."

"Lemon sherbet? Out of all of the flavours out there, you're rocky road and I'm lemon sherbet?"

"Lemon sherbet, in the summer." he corrects.

"Okay, fine. Why?"

"You're boring and basic."

You gasp, trying to feign outrage but not being able to repress the laugh that escapes your throat. You elbow him, his laugh mixing with yours while taking the time to wrap his arms around your form, the breeze blowing your hair allowing him a spot between your neck and your shoulder. "You're boring and basic, but once you have a taste..." he presses a small kiss on your skin, causing the tiny hairs on the nape of your neck to rise. "Once you have a taste, specially on the hottest day in the middle of summer, you can't stop tasting and licking until there's no more lemon sherbet left."

You suck in on a breath when he craddles your jaw to face him. "It's been my favourite flavor since I was a kid." he kisses you immediately after, his lips swallowing the small whimper now stuck in your throat.

You close your eyes as his tongue opens your mouth, arousal blasting your insides and something much, much deeper that you fear to even name shredding your chest.

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The beginning of august comes faster then you two realize, but what you both do realize is how hard it's becoming to stay away from each other.

It's been thirty days of dates happening almost everyday, sharing high school memories and anecdotes of the time you spent away from each other. Hours of getting to know each other and opening up to each other. From failed relationships to new friendships. Of park dates walking side by side and fingers now interwined because you both realized one day that, fuck it.

It's difficult to sleep when you realize you're starting to catch serious feelings for somebody who was just supposed to be a fling. It's hard to sleep when his face, his voice and his touch and thoughts of missing him when you don't see each other start haunting you at night.

It's hard for Jungkook to focus on work when you're everything that's occupying his mind. Because he has a hundred sketches to make but he's too busy thinking about the hundred different sketches he would make of you.

It's hard not to send him a goodnight text, just like it's hard for him not to reply in a matter of seconds, almost as if he was already waiting to recieve it.

Jungkook thinks of you at night. Of how pretty and absolutely perfect you are for him. Of the taste of your lips, the way your hair feels between his fingers, or the flush on your cheeks when he makes you cum as droplets of sweat accumulate between your breasts. He thinks about your voice. He also thinks about the amount of hours left to be able to listen to it again.

But mostly he thinks about how ridiculous this situation is. Because he was stupidly crushing on you when you were only teenagers, daydreaming about a chance with you. And now his crush is long gone and he's starting to realize that he's falling, and falling fast.

You, too, think of Jungkook at night. Of his ability to bring a smile out of you, to soothe you with just a few words and filling your belly excitement, happiness and feelings you're sure you've never felt before.

Jungkook's managed to imprint himself in your dreams, and you, in his.

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Getting drunk with Jungkook is fun and messy.

It's fun because he lets loose, he stutters a lot like he used to do when he was a teenager and he makes you laugh louder than ever before. It's messy because he has no control over his hands as they explore your body, clumsily taking your clothes off as his mouth laps at the breast he's allowed to touch.

He's more forceful and dominating too, pinning your hands above your head, and commanding you to keep them right there, on the pillows of his bed. When you rebel against it, your fingers finding the hard planes of his chest, he pulls away from you and places them back where he left them. "Don't make me tie you up." he threatens, and your body shudders beneath him.

He sucks, and bites and leaves marks all over your skin, grunting in response to your moans. Creating a path of kisses from your lips to your stomach, his shoulders separating your knees, opening you up only for him. And thankfully, when you reach down to tug at the strands of hair framing his face, he lets you, because he knows you need something to hold on to the moment his tongue eats you up. He leaves his fingertrips on your thighs as he keeps you in place, not allowing you to runaway. Just forcing you to take it as he takes from you.

And when you cum, he doesn't back away. He keeps sucking, and licking and punishing you with his mouth until you're cumming over and ove again, screaming and begging for his cock.

Having Jungkook over you, both completely naked, skin to skin and only sweat in between is more than you could've ever fantazised about. He slurls your name when he puts the condom on. He would do anything to feel you raw, but he also knows he wouldn't be able to last a minute. The sight of you spread open, with your cheeks darkened by a crimson blush and your hair tangled all over his pillow is a picture he wants to keep forever.

He enters you when you call his name, your voice dripping with need. He stretches your warm and wet felsh, slowly easing himself into you at first, until he's fully inside and your bodies are completely in union. A shiver runs down Jungkook's spine when he looks at your contorted face in pleasure, your lips forming an 'O' and your pussy clenching around him.

"Oh, my God." you moan into the dark of Jungkook's room, and even then, he can clearly appreciate every curve of your body lifting off the mattress to connect with his. He lowers himself on his elbows on either side of your head, caging you in and capturing your mouth with his.

"I know, baby." he murmurs. It's hot, in the middle of August but suddenly Jungkook doesn't hate summer as much as he used to. Not with you sharing the heat with him. "It's way beyond what I could ever imagine." You nod hurriedly against his lips, your arms finding their way around his neck as he starts rocking in and out of you.

"It's too good." you cry, when he hits a particular spot that has you rolling your eyes in bliss and gripping his waist tighter with your legs against you. Your fingers thread through his hair, not bothered by the beads of sweat gathered on the nape of his neck.

"Too good..." he agrees, not missing the shiver that's shaking your own frame when he picks up his speed. "You have no idea what I would do t-to fucking feel you with n-no barriers between us," his movements become frantic as his hips slap against yours, his jaw clenched as he keeps talking, "to s-stuff you full of my c-cum over and over again until it won't stop d-dripping."

Jungkook's voice against your ear has you trembling and your orgasm nearing closer, your nails scratching down his back as his thrusts overpower your form. "Would you like that?" he asks with his voice strangled.

"Y-yes. Anything y-you want."

"You'd take all of my cum like a good cum-slut?"

You hate the fact that that's what makes you come undone. The twisting and knotting in the pit of your stomach finally snapping until you're holding on to him like you never want to let him go and he's following soon after.

Because if Guk, Gukkie, Jengukkie was not only able to make you come in less than a few minutes with his fingers or his tongue, but he was also able to make you cum instantly just by calling you a good cum-slut, that means you're fucked. Like, really, really fucked.

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There's a knot in Jungkook's stomach and a suffocating grip around his vocal chords as he caresses your skin. The sun is rising in the distance with the first rays of light entering his room through the window. Your shamphoo is intoxicating him, numbing him and enticing him to bury his nose in the tangled curls pressing against his chest. Your arm is thrown across his stomach, your breathing leavig goosebumps all over his body.

"It's too early. Go back to sleep." you mumble against his heart. He wonders if you can feel it dangerously speeding up.

"I can't." he says, voice struggling to stay balanced. "I have to tell you something."

You hum in response, sleep still interwined with your body, your arm tightening around him. You sigh in content, expecting him to elaborate.

He wets his suddenly dry lips. "I don't want this to end. In fact, ____.... I want more. Need more."

"Jungkook..." your whole body goes rigid right away, untanglling your bodies from each other and sitting up on the mattress.

"No, listen to me." he mimicks your movements, rapidly grabbing your hands to make you look at him. His eyes are expressive, a mixture of fear and hope swirling in his dark irises. "I wake up everyday, and you're the first thing I think of. I go on about my day, and I keep thinking about you, wondering what you're doing and counting down the hours until I get to see you again. I spend every night dreaming about you, and when we'e together, the only thing I can think about is how I wish I could stop time so I don't have to say bye to you the next morning. ____, I-"

"Jungkook, stop please." you shake your head, pushing away from him and in desperate need of air. You press a hand against your chest, beating back the throb of pain while the other curls in a tight fist, the feeling of your fingernails digging into your palm less painful than the ache inside your heart. "This... This wasn't supossed to happen, Jungkook." you start pacing around the room, as if trying to find an exit while avoiding his gaze. "This was just a summer fling. That's all it was, I'm supposed to come back to the city in two weeks and-"

"A summer fling?" a sardonic sneer comes out of him. "Oh my God, I can't believe this is happening again..." he mumbles to himself before rising from the bed. You stop immediately, a shiver quaking through you as his impressive frame intimidates His eyebrows are drawn together and his dark eyes are void of any prior emotion. "You're going back to the city in two weeks? And you didn't care to tell me until now, after I just spilled my guts to you?"

You eyes fill up with uncomfortable tears, reaching one arm towards him. "Jung-"

He flinches, taking one step back. "A summer fling is all I mean to you?"

"Ju- "

"Look me in the eyes, right now, and tell me that's all I mean to you. A summer fling." panic crawls up your throat. There's the need within you to confirm, to stare into his beautiful and stern eyes and tell him that, yes, that's all he is to you. But you've never been a good liar. So nothing comes out. You opt for wrapping your ams around yourself wishing they were his and lowering your eyes to the ground. "I think... I think you should leave."

Those are the last words he says to you, and the last thing you see when you turn around one more time after gathering your clothes, is his back as he looks out the window.

You allow yourself to cry the exact moment you step into Chaelin's apartment. Your friend is sitting on the couch, bowl of cereal in hand and a fresh cup of coffee sitting on the livingroom's table.

"Hey, you're early tod- Baby, what's wrong?"

"Please, don't laugh."

That morning, you lay down for hours on the couch with your head on Chaelin's lap while she softly brushes your hair as you cry, hiccup, fight through the pain in your heart and relate to her as best as you can the latest events.

She doesn't laugh at all.

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"She'll come back." Mijoo's slurred words do nothing to put Jungkook's state at ease that night. He simply shrugs, fingers clenching at his sides, frowing into his drink before gulping down the bitter taste of vodka in one shot. "Seriously, I think she's just afraid. My ex was the same."

"Comparing her to your ex is not the analogy you think it is."

"Ugh, shut up. Things didn't work with my ex because she was a bitch." Jungkook gives Mijoo a pointed look which she responds to by rolling her eyes and sipping on her rum coke. "Your girl is not a bitch. She used to be a bitch. What she did this morning was bitchy, but, like I said, she's just being a pussy. If she only wanted sex with you, she wouldn't have been doing couple stuff with you the entire summer."

"Whatever. I don't care." he lies and Mijoo knows he's lying but decides to drop the subject fo now.

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"We can't keep spending our days smoking weed." Chaelin speaks over Blanche's voice on the TV.

"I know. I'm just sad."

"You have to come back and tell him how you feel."

"I know."

There's a beat of silence before your friend kicks your thigh with her feet.

"I know and I will." you mumble through red eyes and smoke clouds.

≿━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━༺❀༻━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━≾

It's September first and it doesn't feel like Jungkook's birthday at all. He's been trying to focus on his work, alternating between isolating in full hermit mode and hanging out with friends to drink away his sorrow. The days have gone by and before he could realize it, he woke up today with over twenty text messages wishing him a happy day and a throbbing hangover.

He dresses up on autopilot. First a cotton shirt, then a pair of jeans and lastly, his Nike's. He doesn't bother tying his sneakers just like he doesn't bother taking a shower. He smokes a cigarette for breakfast, the death stick making him feel nauseaus on an empty stomach. And then he goes to work.

He's been repeating the same routing for the past weeks and he's not thinking of changing it, not even on his bithday.

He spends hours drawing, tattooing and drawing some more between yawns. He ignores texts an phone calls and simply waits until the day is over to go home, go to bed and forget about the fact that you're probably on your way to the city and that he hasn't crossed your mind not even once.

≿━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━༺❀༻━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━≾

Inkphoria.

You've been standing outside the shop re-reading the word for fifteen minutes, although it definitely feels like it has been longer. You're gripping cup of ice cream as it melts down your fingers the more you wait. The shop is already empty and it's starting to darken out side, and still you're so hot. Your shorts are heavy and your tank top is sticking to your skin. You didn't even bother to put on any make, although your eyebags definitely needed some concieling and your lashes some dimension to hide the fact that you'd been crying for the last few days.

'You're crazy about him.'

Chaelin's voice echoes inside your head.

You've lost count of how many times your best friend has given your advice, or simply encouraged you to do something you've been too scared to try.

'And he's cazy about you too.'

Chaelin might be wrong about marmite and the movie Cats, but she's definitely now wrong about anything regarding your and Jungkook.

That's it. You briefly close your eyes, inhale a deep breath then release it slowly. You start walking. It doesn't take longer than three strides and you're pushing the door open.

The tattoed blonde looks up from the counter the second you come into view. She smiles at the distance between you two. "You can come closer. I won't bite."

You clear your throat, stalking closer to her. "Is he-"

"He's in the back." she replies before you can finish you question. You close your mouth, clear your throat and nod your head.

"Thanks, Mijoo." she gives you a small wink, her smile easing your nerves like she had three months ago.

She watches you disappear. She shakes he head, her smile meeting her eyes. "I told him so."

≿━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━༺❀༻━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━≾

Jungkook ignores the knock on his door at first. It's almost ten and the parlor is about to close. He just has to finish this last fucking sketch so he can grab his shit and go the fuck ho-

Knock knock.

He growls, exhasperation cursing through him. He runs a hand through his messy pile of hair, his rings tangling between the strands, making him wince in pain. "Come in." he grunts under his breath. The door opens. "Mijoo, I really have to finish-"

He stops dead in his tracks as soon as he sees you.

"Hey." you say after a moment of hesitation.

"Hey." he replies and although there's something inside, deep in his chest, shouting at him to stand up, run up to you and kiss your face while he tells you how beautiful you look right now and how happy he is to see that you're still here, he decides against it. "Listen, ____, I'm pretty busy-"

"No, you listen to me." you cut him off abruptly. He looks taken aback and is already opening his mouth to say something, but you're not having it. "Please, just... Let me talk."

Silence looms between the two of you for a while, a staring contest defying each other to back down. When you take one step inside and close the door behind you, he sighs and leans back against his chair.

You move towards him slowly, your lip caught between your lip going through your mind for the speech you'd been preparing the last few days. Your hands are sticky due to the the sugary treat liquifying in your hand. "I know there's no reason you should give me another chance after rejecting you in high school, and there's definitely no reason why you should forgive me for the way I shut you out a few weeks ago. You've been confessing your feelings to me since we were teenagers, and now it's my turn to tell you exactly how I feel about you."

"Jungkook, the truth is... I like you so much. I like you more than I've ever liked anyone. Ever. I said this was just a summer fling, and I was lying. I was lying because there's no way a simple summer fling could make me feel the way you do. There's no way a simple summer fling could make me want not just summer with you, but also fall and winter, and spring and every summer that comes next."

You hadn't realize when your eyes filling up with tears until the sight of him starts blurrying in front of you. His fingers reach yours, his thumb comforting on your skin. "____, it's okay-"

"I'm not done yet." you sniffle, gathering enough courage to continue. "I brought you a lemon sherbet because you said it was your favourite. But you also implied I was your favourite, and I want to keep being you favourite, but now it's already melted and-"

The corners of Jungkook's lips start pulling upward as he tugs you towards him, his heart loudly jumping inside his chest. "Shhh, come here."

He takes the ice cream from your hand and places it on his desk. Then he's helping you onto his lap, your head tucked under his chin and your arms wapping on their own around his neck.

He doesn't care about your sticky fingers or the wet stains of your tears in his shirt. The only thing he cares about is the fact that you're right there, letting him engulf your frame and drown in the scent and warmth he'd misses so much.

≿━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━༺❀༻━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━≾

The first day of June has Jungkook sweating and wishing for a haircut. Jungkook usually hates summer. He hates the fact that he has to shower at least twice a day, and the fact that the heat is almost unbearable to sleep in and also the fact that he's easily sunburnt.

This year, however, Jungkook likes summer a little bit more.

"Excuse me, miss. Do you have an appointment?" it's the fact that you're starting to wear those summer dresses he loves so much, and the fact that your skin glows under the sun like glitter, and also the fact that he can lick ice cream off of it whenever he desires.

"I am the appointment." your giggle is almost childlike, playing with Jungkook's heart strings. You shut the door behind you, nearing him. You also seem to always have that flush on your cheeks. Although he likes to think part of it is due to him. He doesn't say anything else as he puts his pencil down and instead turns around in the chair to have you immediately on top of his thighs.

Yeah, he also likes the path your lips trace from his cheek, to his jaw, ending at the juncture between his neck and his shoulder. It still makes his body quaver to this day.

"Let me see." he murmurs against you forhear, his hand already working on unbottoning the front of your dress.

"Mijoo hasn't left yet." you whisper back, your smile impossible to supress and the faint whimper impossible to hide when his fingers expose your breast and tug at the titanium barbell adorning the already hardened nub.

Jungkook loves knowing he was the one to do that, and also the only one to play with it. He doesn't hesitate when he dips his head. "As if we'd ever cared about that." he adds, wrapping your sole point in his mouth.

He fucks you on his studio table with your legs around his waist and his tongue playing with both your breasts, the tattoo sketches long forgotten, scattered on the floor as he whispers against your flesh something that sounds a lot like 'I love you'.

#jungkook #jeon jungkook #jungkook smut #bts fanfic #jungkook angst #jungkook x reader #bts #bts fic #bts smut #jungkook fic

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