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serephinastardust · 6 months

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Sonnets of Stillness

In the quiet chambers of my soul,

Ennui emerges, an uninvited toll.

A stagnant river, flowing slow,

Symbolic echoes of a tranquil woe.

The clock ticks with a lethargic beat,

A weighty anchor, grounding fleet.

Shadows linger, a silent plea,

Drowning in a sea of apathy.

The caged canary's song has waned,

Melancholy notes in solitude sustained.

A wilted rose, once vibrant red,

Now sighs in petals, dreams long-fled.

A sepia painting of a sunlit day,

Colors muted, joy in disarray.

The pendulum swings in languid grace,

Time suspended in a listless space.

In the tapestry of ennui, threads are spun,

Each representing dreams undone.

The moon, a distant, indifferent muse,

Casts pallid light on emotions abused.

A lonely boat adrift on a tranquil lake,

Ripples of ennui in its wake.

The worn-out novel on the shelf,

Pages yellowed, mirroring the self.

Yet, within ennui's silent reign,

Seeds of introspection may sustain.

For in the quiet, there lies a chance,

To find renewal, to break the trance.

In ennui's grip, emotions entwined,

A canvas of the soul, deeply defined.

A journey through the shadows' art,

Seeking solace in a weary heart.

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serephinastardust · 6 months

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The Love Story

Ink-stained pages, a lover’s embrace,

Whispers of worlds in a quiet space.

Leather-bound secrets, a fragrant delight,

Each chapter unfolds like a kiss in the night.

With every word, a heartbeat shared,

Between the covers, dreams are dared.

Fingers caress the paper, so smooth,

Lost in the story, hearts start to move.

Imagination takes flight, like a dove,

Within the verses, we find endless love.

Stories entwine like a passionate dance,

In the arms of books, we find romance.

Eyes trace the lines, a gentle trace,

In the library’s hush, we find our place.

A symphony of words, a whispered song,

In the arms of a book, we truly belong.

Each tale a journey, a magical flight,

Reading books, we find endless night.

A lover's refuge, a boundless sea,

In books, we discover what it means to be free.

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serephinastardust · 6 months

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Rising from the ashes, a Phoenix I shall be,

The flames of despair might kill me,

But it won't keep me down.

Rising from the flames, a Phoenix is my symbol,

Stronger I will grow, resilient is my will.

Beneath the moonlit sky, i will soar so high,

Painting the skies in hues,

My masterpiece of brilliance,

The colors of my bruises,

Show the story of my battles,

And of my perseverance.

Rising from ashes, a Phoenix I am now,

Building up my strength,

To take down all my demons.

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serephinastardust · 6 months

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I see you there inside my mind ,

Always haunting never leaving.

You got me tightly in this bind.

Why am I like this?

Spiraling out of control.

Why do you haunt my waking moments.

My dreams, see no relief

I'm exhausted all the time.

Sleep eludes,

And awake is torture.

Leave my mind, i beg you now.

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serephinastardust · 6 months

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Universal Story

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If life is like a story, where's my ink and paper?

If I'm the main character,

Can I rewrite my future, to make it more happier.

If I am a protagonist,

Why is the universe my antagonist.

But when will these trials and tribulations,

Ease up and let me fly.

This story seems horrendous,

I doubt I could stomach reading it.

But if I were to read my story,

Would I feel better inside?

If life is like a story, am I a damsel in distress?

Where's my knight, to save me,

From all the monsters and demons.

If life is like a story, am I hero or a villain?

Or am I only briefly mentioned,

Not to take a lead.

If life is like a story, I assume I am a side piece.

Unimportant to write in,

Unimportant to even describe.

Where's my ink and paper,

I need to rewrite my part.

I'm tired of all the trouble, the universe is dishing.

So i beg of you, dear universe,

Let me finish my story,

For all I want is happiness, which you cannot provide.

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serephinastardust · 6 months

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Am I?

Am I in too deep,

or am I in too shallow.

Am I over examining everything,

or am I not paying enough attention.

Am I working to hard,

or am I not working hard enough.

Am I climbing a mountain too steep,

or am I climbing something hallow.

Am I considered a king,

or am I a misconception.

Am I maybe a just a bard,

or am I a diamond in the rough.

The questions want to drown out all,

Leaving all the important to stall.

I may not know my true identity,

But somehow I will find my serenity.

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serephinastardust · 6 months

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Dark and light, an endless battle,

The cosmic balance, not one to prattle.

But nothing is never just black or white,

There's much to gray to fight for rights.

The cosmic battle happens in my mind,

But also everyone else in this bind.

We each are villains and also hero's,

For no one ever balances to zero.

So why do we battle for dark and light,

It really is a poisonous blight.

No one truth is truly right,

This battle is quite contrite.

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serephinastardust · 6 months

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Phoenix: A Song of Eternal Rebirth

In the heart of ashes, where embers sigh,

Lives a tale of a creature that will never die.

A Phoenix, born from the fiery pyre,

With wings of hope, it ascends higher and higher.

From the remnants of its fiery demise,

It emerges anew, beneath radiant skies.

A creature of legend, both fierce and bright,

Igniting the world with its eternal light.

In every flame, its spirit takes flight,

A beacon of courage in the darkest night.

Feathers of crimson, like the setting sun,

It soars through the heavens, its journey begun.

In the depths of despair, where shadows loom,

The Phoenix rises, dispelling all gloom.

A symbol of resurrection, of life's endless song,

In its fiery dance, we, too, belong.

With each rebirth, it carries our dreams,

Glowing with passion, in vibrant, golden streams.

A story of triumph, in every feathered plume,

The Phoenix, a testament to life's eternal bloom.

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serephinastardust · 6 months

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Hello my friend, what have we today?

Fatigue, and pain, with disassociation,

Sounds good, sounds good, what must I pay?

Ignore the world with books and coloring,

Keep the burnout forever at bay.

Write your books and plan your projects,

Stress it out, stress it out, but have fun too.

Force through the fatigue, until you pass out

Work through the pain, until motivated for exercise.

Decrease your sleep, up your stress,

Chug caffeine until depressed.

Keep your mask on, forget yourself,

Feel like your living in a swamp.

Forever have to prove oneself.

#female writers #my writing #writers on tumblr #writers and poets #poetry #poet #original poem #poems on tumblr #spilled poetry #poets on tumblr #poem #poems and poetry #life poetry #original poetry #seraphinastardust

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serephinastardust · 6 months

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You, my root demon

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When I hear you call my name,

I shake and shrink and run away.

You trigger voices, deeply menacing,

My instincts die, no bells will ring.

Your anger is like molten fire,

Why, oh why, you don't grow tired.

It haunts my dream, and thoughts unbidden,

The trauma I just want to ridden.

From child to now I try to heal,

Not wanting the past to haunt me hear.

I turn off my thoughts, but that leaves me numb,

How and why did you do this to me.

Memories are black when they should be vibrant,

A colorful tapestry, for me to appreciate.

But instead all I see are pin holes of color,

A portal instead for the demons arrival.

I should not have this primal fear,

I don't think you realize the damage you caused.

But what hurts me the most, ironic it is,

When you are calm, I just want to be near.

I am the child, who has to fear thier father,

Because he couldn't regulate his anger.

But it wasn't because of what you would think,

Disregulating emotions was his trigger.

Things out of place, or things not done right,

People too nosy or people not bright.

But what's worse with this fear,

That it brings me to tear,

How do I function when conflict appears?

I struggle with raised voices,

I struggle with conflict,

If people's auras flair up,

My heart beat will rise.

My legs will shake, and I grow weak in knees,

The tears come unbidden, to these strangers here,

My throat will close up, because I can't let them see,

How broken my trauma has left me here.

My emotions are a burden, because of all this,

Even when I cut you from my life.

But even though cut, you still try to stay in,

With gifts that you thought I would need.

But because of my trauma, I'm cautious of your gifts,

You've gotten angry, because I tried to be free.

You've threatened to stop stuff, you volunteered

freely,

You've called me ungrateful for doing all the could,

I'm a user, abuser of all your goodwill,

Even though I can never say no.

But moving a way has help me heal,

Though I still fear you, your anger is random

I don't have to fear seeing your person,

I don't have to fear hearing your voice.

My mental health issues, are probably not your fault,

You definitely exasperated them, now I'm an adult.

I honestly don't know why I still live,

As living with you I had made 3 attempts.

But some how I'm here, and I don't feel a thing,

Which is terribly sad,

Because this isn't how I pictured my adult self,

Hiding, and unavailable to the world in my home.

Just know you never once told me "i love you",

And i still really don't know what that means.

But I vowed as a child my kids would know,

The words of I love you, from a parents mouth.

A child knows love so unconditionally,

That even if I, an adult, don't know its meaning,

At least the children I say, will instinctually know.

So I will stop part of this generational curse,

Because what you have done has been extremely cruel.

P.s

The one and only memory I have of you saying,

These three words, "I love you",

I was an adult about thirty, and it shocked me.

The whole household stopped and just stared.

After being disowned, gaslighted and more,

I didn't know how to react to that.

But all I could think was who was this man,

What had he done with his indifference.

Did he think three word at thirty,

Would make up for my childhood trauma.

But toxic is as toxic does,

And it wasn't long before he did me dirty.

And ao he lives with my void once again,

And maybe when dead, we'll try again then.

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serephinastardust · 6 months

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Sleep well my child,

For dreams come your way.

Down by the ocean and out in the wild.

I will meet ,you down by the bay.

Because I want, to sail through the storms,

And fly through the sea,

Prick my finger on a rose thorn.

For all is in balance, when you are with me.

Sleep well my child,

I shield you from darkness,

Filter in the light,

And take your stress away.

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serephinastardust · 6 months

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Whispers of Resilience: Breaking Shadows, Embracing Light

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Shadows became my friends,

While friends were all around.

Dark and isolating, I feel at home,

Silence has been my comfort, when comfort is what I lack.

Dreaming of the light, I wish it to shine,

Enhancing my senses, trying to fight back.

My many sins try and shackle me,

Yet in the depths, I seek what I lack.

Through the obsidian, a glimmer of dawn,

A flicker of hope, a spirit reborn.

In the quiet corners, where shadows retreat,

I find the strength to stand on my feet.

Silence, once heavy, now a guiding thread,

Leading me out of the darkness I dread.

With newfound courage, I break the chains,

Embracing the light, where freedom reigns.

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serephinastardust · 6 months

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Honest Complexity

Has anyone ever tried to write a story, where the plot seems unique but super simple, but as you progress in the story and developing the characters. It turns out to a lot more complex for a plot. I love my story, because I love the trips down soul memory lane to past lives. But now that I'm working on the antagonist, I've come to realize, that it was made up of one single betrayal, epochs before my characters souls even started their first life, and it was catalyst that caused them to not be able to fullfil their cosmic destinies of writing this wrong until now. And the biggest coincidence, is that even though my Lysandra thought she was body snatching to fullfil her twisted plans that stemmed from that betrayal. She has ultimately, prevented this cycle of death the trio has experienced for many lives because she took over one of their bodies. And my Lysandra will ultimately be the reason this story will be able to continue, even though she's hell bent on keeping the body all too herself forever.

This was not what I had intended when I started this 2-3 weeks ago. But it makes so sense, like the universe was like "Fuck this shit" and set it up where Seraphina just happened to coincidently find the Nexus rift that Lysandra just happened to be near at the time.

The Universe must serious be tired of the dark rippling energy that's slowly erroding the Nexus.

All I had planned innitially was Seraphina getting power going home, and going "Fuck this engagement to hell, and having the power to break the magic seal without harming the families." And in the process ending up with a reverse harem of sorts, but not having much more to go on than that. I'm still aiming for a reverse harem, but mixed gender, but haven't really delved much into those relations or feelings considering how quickly Seraphina was stolen from the 2 men.

And given the past lives I've delved into for the 3, those three are sure thing even if it's just friendship, they wouldn't leave eachother ever after all those lives of death and betrayal.

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You see what mean? Such simple idea's, and it was like nope, complex everything. Complex characters, complex themes, complex plot, twist here, twist there, knot this, and knot that. And now I'm trying to not fuck it.

I have to ask an AI if my ideas even make sense. If it makes sense to a computer, I have faith it makes sense to a human.

#female writers #my writing #writers on tumblr #writers and poets #writers blog #writer #writing #writerscommunity #writeblr #writing ideas #writer things #writerscorner #writerblr #writerslife #seraphinastardust #epic fantasy book #book blog #book writing

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serephinastardust · 6 months

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Flames to me I burn,

The heat I desire so,

Water is my prize

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serephinastardust · 6 months

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Reborn

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The flames that I bare,

The ashes that fall around.

The beauty is me.

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serephinastardust · 6 months

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Watching ink as black as night,

Thick as soup, with sticky claws,

Disjointed movements, blood-red eyes,

Grip my soul and before it takes flight.

Quickly searching to find my flaws,

Frozen stiff, but cannot cry.

Darkness quickly becomes my friend,

Old and silent, a too tight embrace,

A claustrophobic, sickly place.

Silence becomes my second friend,

Loud, obnoxious, and delusional,

Make me question even my face.

The sickly ink as black as night,

Changes with different demons,

But dark and silence always stay,

And all I do is watch their play.

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