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clovrtree · 3 months

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Peter had never felt more angry at a wizard before in his life until this moment. Certainly a strange thing to think about as he walked tiredly through dark and dreary streets, but nonetheless, it was how he felt.

Doctor Strange- “Call me Stephen.”- had sent Peter Parker to an entirely new universe. At least, that’s what he believed had happened. There wasn’t necessarily an exact answer as to how he ended up here, only a who that was responsible for it. And right now Peter was very angry at that who.

Memories of Titan were shoved to the forefront of his mind, a planet scorched by the sun and catastrophically destroyed by war. It’s destruction was a product of the very war that Peter had been fighting before he-

His footsteps faltered as he remembered his death.

“Mr. Stark, I don’t feel so good–” Peter said with a shake in his breath as a sudden fuzziness started crawling up his limbs. His spider-sense was going haywire, overwhelming his senses and leaving the boy a stuttering mess. “I-I don’t- I don’t know what’s happening–” he said frantically as he stumbled to his mentor.

Tony Stark swallowed hard. His face displayed anguish that Peter didn’t want to see. “...you’re alright.” He said all too steadily, like a father comforting a child. When Peter got close enough, he clung to the man, feeling his feet get swept from underneath him in the wind. Tears pricked at the teen’s eyes, grip tight on Tony’s jacket.

“I-I don’t wanna go-” he said through tears, nose becoming congested from the surge of raw fear running through him. His spine tingled, and over Tony’s shoulder, he caught a glimpse of his own fingers turning into ash. “I don’t wanna go-” he repeated in a plea. “Please, sir, I don’t wanna go-”

Tony kneeled down, setting Peter on the ground. His hands never left the teen, and the teen never let him go. Peter swallowed roughly, forcing tears back as he looked up at Titan’s yellow sky. It wasn’t the blue one that he so desperately needed to see, the familiar sky of Earth.

He was far from Earth now, and he would never be going back.

Peter turned his gaze back to Tony, looking the man in the eyes and forcing his mouth to work once more. He needed to say something to Tony, tell him anything- he couldn’t let himself die like this in Tony’s arms.

“I’m sorry.”

Not without an apology delivered on the brink of death.

Everything after that was white hot, and he couldn’t recall a single second of his time after turning into ash. All he knew was that he watched Tony become a blur, and then a second later, he was gasping for air and clawing his way onto a rocky New England shore.

The puddle below his heavy foot splashed and soaked the ends of the ratty jeans he had fished out of a dumpster upon arrival. They were far too big for him and sat loose on his hips, but he preferred them instead of walking around in his Iron Spider suit, which still clung to his damp skin underneath his makeshift clothes.

He felt miserable, and if he was soaking wet for much longer, then he would surely be sick. Of course that wouldn’t be a big deal, considering his healing factor. It was still uncomfortable as hell, and he especially didn’t want to be sick in a strange city like this one.

The Gotham Gazette drew his attention, the soaking wet newspaper discarded on the ground up ahead. He hesitantly reached down, picking it up and holding back a wince at the feeling of the damp paper.

Most of the smaller words in the articles were already soaked and smudged away in the rain, but the title and a few headings still boldly displayed themselves. Fourth Arkham Break-Out of the Year. Wayne Enterprises Donates 1.7 Billion to Homeless Shelters Benefiting Crime Alley. Red Hood Busts Human Trafficking Ring in the Harbor.

This city, supposedly called Gotham, sounded rough. The Asylum was experiencing break-outs like a prison, there were known human trafficking rings… at least Wayne Enterprises seemed to be doing something to help the homelessness rates of the city. That was something that Peter had noticed as soon as he made it to the main city from the harbor- the amount of homeless citizens was vastly concerning.

A bit more smudged reading told Peter that it was April third of 2016- a whole two years before Thanos. Before Peter would die. The mere thought of his death once more sent an uncomfortable shiver up his spine, and he was now hyper aware of how dreadful this situation was.

Even worse, he was in New Jersey. Peter had never heard of Gotham, New Jersey, which felt extremely odd. A city with this much crime would surely gather the attention of the Avengers, or some other hero who could help.

Maybe that’s who Red Hood is, Peter thought, dropping the newspaper into a nearby trashcan and continuing his aimless walk. Part of him hoped so, since the person seemed to be doing good work for the city.

The smell of cigarette smoke assaulted Peter’s nose as he passed an alleyway, and he scrunched his face in discomfort. A quick glance that direction showed a group of men wearing stained and torn clothing sitting around a dying out trash fire. His heart gave a pained beat in his chest. Even a second around that small fire would likely warm his senses enough to find a safe place to spend the rest of the night.

Unfortunately for Peter’s senses, his mind was much more rational. These men didn’t know him, and they were much older than him. They likely weren’t keen on sharing, and since they were smoking, Peter didn’t want to sit near that smell for so long.

So he continued.

The teen wasn’t sure exactly how long that he walked, but the moon had shifted quite a lot from its initial position earlier in the night. He caught a glimpse of it through the dreary clouds every so often, rain pelting his face.

“Karen, what kind of info can you pick up?” he mumbled under his breath, and in response, he felt nanobots brushing around his ear until they had made a small bud for him to listen to.

“Hi, Peter. Currently I’m unable to grab any information from the internet, as none of my sources seem to have updated to our current geological location.”

Peter frowned at her response, sticking his hands into the pockets of the stained gray zip-up hoodie he had grabbed when he got the jeans. “That doesn’t make any sense, what’s your database looking like?”

“Looks like it usually does, Peter. However, nothing from my internal storages is aligning with any metadata that I’m receiving from this environment.”

“So.. nothing on Gotham, New Jersey?”

“No, sorry, Peter.”

Peter huffed through his nose, hearing the A.I. go silent in his ear. To anyone who looked close enough, it just seemed like he had one generic-brand earbud. Upon closer inspection, though, anyone could see the small trail of metal going down into his hoodie.

“Run a diagnostic, see what all is online. I’ll try to find you something with internet to connect to.”

The lack of response told the teen that she had started on the diagnostics, so he grew quiet too. He would rather people not think he’s insane for mumbling to himself under his breath.

Eventually, Peter looked up from the sidewalk and paused, a wave of discomfort washing over him. To his right was Gotham Public Library. All of the lights were off inside, but the outdoor ones illuminated a large clock-face reading 3:47.

To his left, a cemetery with tall black metal fences was emitting an eerie fog across the entire half of the street. It went down for at least another block. Just looking at the place of rest made a tingle rush up his spine and to his neck, buzzing there.

Breaking and entering was definitely a crime. Always had been, always would be, even in this city that isn't supposed to exist. Still, Peter was cold and tired, and he just needed to close his eyes for a little bit. If he would be breaking into anywhere, it would be somewhere with the word “Public” plastered above the front door.

Like the Gotham Public Library, how perfect. He skipped up the steps two at a time, standing underneath the large stone awning for a second to enjoy the feeling of no rain! It was great, but now he needed a way inside.

On the front of the building, all of the doors and windows were locked tight, and Peter frowned. Of course a city with this much crime would be under lock and key. He would need a different entrance.

As quietly and inconspicuously as possible, Peter Parker rounded the building twice, looking at windows and potential entrances. Eventually, on his second lap, he spotted a slightly opened window through the heavy rain. Parker luck be damned, he was about to be somewhere warm.

Scaling the wall was effortless with his spider abilities, and fitting through the small window was easy as pie. The boots of his Iron Spider suit landed on a tiled floor of a women's restroom (he only knew that due to the lack of a urinal). A quick glance around the space told him that the lights were motion activated, so he bit the bullet and went to the door. The blinding overhead light activated and he winced, giving himself a small glance in the mirror as he passed.

He had to backtrack his steps, eyes widening when he really took stock of himself. His skin was sheened with sweat and rain, and little cuts and bruises littered his cheeks and forehead. Unzipping the gray hoodie showed the damaged Iron Spider suit, and he frowned at the large gash across his side. It had broken skin, but stopped bleeding a while ago. He hoped it wouldn’t get infected, because even with his healing factor, those were still uncomfortable.

The worst part of his appearance was his hair. The semi-curly brown locks seemed to have gotten.. Longer? Usually he kept his hair cut clean at his ears, but now strands were wisping along the back of his neck. Strangely enough, a large strand on his hairline, right by his temple, was a chalky white color. Reaching up and feeling it revealed nothing, because it felt fine.

This only opened even more questions for the teen, who sighed tiredly through his nose. He just wanted to lay down somewhere. He would assess his situation more in the morning, when the sun was up.

Right now, nothing would make sense due to his exhaustion and temperature. Any thoughts of Doctor Strange, Titan, or Thanos just made him uncomfortable and made no sense. So he dropped it- for now.

Exiting the bathroom quietly, he glanced around. Peter was on the second floor of three it seemed. Nearby, two elevator shafts stuck awkwardly out of the wall. Across the floor, a big staircase would take him either down or up. In the middle of the floor was a big hole that looked out into the bottom floor, and when Peter looked up, he was greeted by a large glass dome.

On a sunny day, this building would be beautiful. He could already imagine it bustling with life. Assuming there was a college nearby, he could see different students sitting at the various tables, couches, and beanbags doing work or reading books of all sorts. This building just felt good, and was such a stark contrast from both the cemetery across the street and the city itself.

A quick surveillance walk around the second floor revealed that there were cameras, but none were active. There were no more motion activated lights either, meaning that Peter was free to roam without drawing any attention from the outside.

“Alright, Karen, let’s hook you up to a computer.” Peter said softly, metal boots padding against the carpeted floor as he walked to a large set of computers across multiple desks. He slid into a chair and typed in the guest login information that was written on a sticky note attached to the monitor.

Using his right hand, he loaded up Google. With his left, he reached down to the actual computer itself, feeling around on the front of the box until he found a USB port. Seconds later, the nanobots on his hands shifted and changed until one finger of the suit was plugged into the computer.

“Diagnostics are complete, would you like to hear them?”

“Mhm.” Peter hummed, typing with one hand and searching up a few key words. Avengers, Tony Stark, Spiderman, Captain America, Iron Man, and Wakanda all resulted in nothing useful. His brows pinched together in concern. None of this stuff seemed to even exist.

“Overall status is 42%. Your web shooters are at a combined capacity of 68%. Your suit sustained severe damage to the primary left side, but there is considerable damage located all over. The suggested course of action is to make repairs as soon as conveniently possible before joining another fight.”

“Thanks, Karen.” he sighed, not happy about the information. It wasn’t all bad, he had much more web fluid than he had originally anticipated. The damage wouldn’t be easy to fix without either a lab, or Tony. Both would be wonderful right about now. “You connected to the internet yet?”

“Yes, are you ready to hear my findings?”

“Ready as I’ll ever be.”

Peter Parker was in Gotham, New Jersey. It was the crime capital of the entire world. Despite its high crime rates, it was being watched over by a group of vigilantes, led by one called Batman. The others, with various bat and bird themed names, all worked as a single unit to keep this single city safe. They rarely ever branched out.

The Avengers did not exist. The closest thing was another group of heroes known as the Justice League, which was formed by Batman and two others: Wonder Woman and Superman. They were a heavy mix of people with powers, called Metas, and people without powers, like Batman.

Thanos did not exist. There was never an attack from him or his forces. Instead, there were other contacts with different races and species of aliens from all across the universe. Some of them were members of the Justice League now.

Spiderman did not exist. It didn’t take much to hack into public records, and there was never a Peter Benjamin Parker born in Queens. No one was ever bitten by a radioactive spider, and no one ever became Spiderman.

“Peter?”

He could hear her voice in his ear, but nothing was registering. The pure lack of anything familiar made a dreadful discomfort climb up his back, and his vision got a bit fuzzy.

“Peter, I’m picking up an increased heart rate as well as sporadic brain activity. Would you like for me to alert someone for medical aid?”

“No..” he mumbled. “....people here can’t.. They can’t know I’m not from….” he trailed off, leaning back in his chair and staring at the blurry white computer monitor.

“That you’re from a different universe?”

“..yeah, that.”

Peter’s stay in the library concluded with him taking a short nap in a soft green beanbag, and the lights flickering to life at seven a.m. He shot up from his light sleep, stumbling quickly to his feet. A worker was here, likely to get ready to open for the day. He needed to leave.

His dart across the second floor was silent thanks to his spider enhancements and the Iron Spider suit, and he climbed out the bathroom window without looking back. Maybe next time, he could sleep longer and do less research on his problems.

Looking around, things started to make more sense. This was a different universe. Sure it looked enough like his own, but there were small differences. Logos for big brands were slightly altered, celebrities looked different and some didn’t even exist. Catchy songs had different melodies, lyrics, artists, or even genres here. Why did Taylor Swift write “Bring Me to Life”? Evanescence had perfected that song!

Things slowly started to click into place as the sun rose over Gotham’s Atlantic horizon. He was in a different universe, and he needed a way to deal with all of this.

Peter had the itching feeling that going home was no longer an option. Even if it was, he wouldn’t know how, and there was no guarantee what would be waiting for him on the other side. The Guardians of the Galaxy all turned to ash seconds before Peter did- who's to say the same didn’t happen to his loved ones? To May? Ned? MJ?

The teen wiped his eyes with the back of his hand as he directed his path towards the more.. Higher-class side of Gotham. He wanted to get out of the crime-ridden areas as soon as possible. The quicker he found somewhere to get help without exposing his cross dimensional identity the better.

After sneaking onto three public buses, jumping a subway gate, and offering his seat on the train to a pregnant woman, he stepped out into the lighter side of the city. Entering a place that he noted on a brochure map as Bristol, he looked around curiously at the cityscape before him.

Here the sidewalks were new, the traffic lights worked, and there was greenery lining every corner. Fancy and expensive cars that reminded Peter of The Great Gatsby carted up and down the roads. Teens in navy blue school uniforms walked in the same direction, likely towards a school.

Getting enrolled in a school sounded fantastic right about now, because it would mean easy access to both information and a chemistry lab. Unfortunately, it was hard to get enrolled anywhere when you had no documents like Peter.

Instead, he turned towards the neighborhoods. One of these rich families had to have something good in their garbage. Some thrown out devices, good clothes, maybe even food that the picky kids were too biased to eat.

Honestly, Peter would take anything at this point. He just needed resources, even if it came from a rich man’s dumpster. As they say, one man’s trash is another man’s treasure, and in this scenario, Peter was dumpster diving from modern Kings.

The first few houses that he passed had long winding driveways, and sleek, modern buildings. They were boxy and dark, with too many windows. He could have sworn that he saw a pool in more than a few backyards through the slatted gates. Only one place caught his eye.

A large brooding manor sat on top of a slight hill, with a driveway comparable to a hiking trail. Its gates, while well kept, were obviously old. Likely the first gates and fences to be put on the property. Thanks to Karen connecting to the internet last night, Peter could ask her a few questions now.

“Who lives here?” Peter asked, standing in front of the gate and mentally debating how much energy it would take to scale it without triggering the multiple sensors he had already spotted.

“You are looking at Wayne Manor, home of Bruce Wayne and some of his children.”

“Only some?” Peter asked casually, grabbing a hold of the bars and starting to climb upwards. Sure, he was in broad daylight, but all the teens were at school by now, and any adults were either at work or still in bed, truly living luxurious lives.

“Yes, currently his sons Damian Wayne, Duke Thomas-Wayne, and Timothy Drake-Wayne live here. His other children include Richard Grayson-Wayne, Jason Todd-Wayne, and his two daughters, Cassandra Cain and Stephanie Brown.”

The amount of last names gave Peter a pretty clear image of what kind of guy Bruce Wayne was: and that was a playboy. He had lots of kids, only a few lived at home, and almost all of them had two last names. If the manor wasn’t so Victorian looking, Peter might have even dared to compare Bruce to Tony.

“Anything else I need to know about this place?”

“Bruce Wayne is the CEO of Wayne Enterprises, having taken over the company after his parents both died when he was young. He seems to have a tendency to take in orphans, as well as making hefty donations to public works projects. As for the Wayne Property, both the house and the fence are original. I am however picking up some sort of underground space, but there appears to be something blocking my signal.”

Peter landed on the other side of the fence, flat-footed boots crunching on the gravel. “Something blocking your signal?” he asked, starting his trek up the driveway. Learning this history was cool and all, but he was more interested in both the trash and that underground room? Space? Either way, he wanted to know what it was.

“Yes, I can’t get a layout schematic of the room. However, I did get one of the rest of the house. The first-floor study has a secret staircase going down into the hidden room.”

“Cool, I’ll keep that in mind if they ever invite me in for tea.” The teen joked sarcastically, picking up a jog to reach the house.

He avoided the front door, porch, and steps with a ten-foot radius, instead going to either side to check for trash cans. Upon finding none, he frowned. They were likely kept in the back, so he continued his search. The cameras and sensors definitely went noticed, but he paid them no mind. The Waynes would just see a homeless man dumpster diving, no big deal. He was sure it happened all the time in Gotham.

Success shone on Peter in the form of two industrial-sized green dumpsters, one of which had the top open. Peter sighed quietly in relief, approaching them and first, checking for any internal sensors. Upon finding one, Peter climbed in as silently as possible.

This was not his first time going dumpster diving, and he was sure it wouldn’t be his last, either. After the Battle of New York, Peter, May, and Ben had been temporarily homeless. This meant lots of dumpsters, shelters, and stretched thin dollars.

This also meant that Peter knew what to look for while diving for trash. Most businesses tended to use a strategy called “souping” to prevent dumpster divers, which was the process of individually opening and/or destroying any products so that no one would deem them valuable. Most private homes however did not do this.

A throat being cleared pulled Peter from his search, and he yelped in surprise, quickly standing up straight and looking towards the house. His tingle should have alerted him if anyone was around! Why did it not go off??

The man looking at Peter was a well kept older gentleman wearing an ensemble expected of a butler. The black suit and slacks were pressed to perfection, and even his white cuffs and undershirt lacked any sort of stain or evidence of wear. His hair was thin, balding, and a sterling gray. It used to be black. His mustache was perfect.

“...oh my, I hadn’t realized that you were a child.” The man’s posture and expression softened the moment that he took full stock of Peter. The teen frowned- okay he was small but he wasn’t that small.

“I’m sixteen, sir.” he mumbled, and Karen sparked quietly to life in his ear.

“Alfred Pennyworth. Former soldier during World War Two, and current butler for the household.”

Peter really would have enjoyed knowing that this man existed about ten minutes ago, so that he could have avoided the one man who probably knew everything about the property. Glancing down to the butler’s hands, he realized that he was carrying trash bags. That’s why the dumpster had been empty.

“I-I’m also sorry- uh I didn’t- look I can go-” Peter stumbled over his words and his feet, climbing out of the dumpster. His ribs stung when he arched his side, and he winced in discomfort.

“My boy, you are quite alright.” Pennyworth said quickly and calmly, setting down the two white garbage bags. “Are you injured?”

“I-It’s not a big deal, It’ll heal. I’m sorry about your– Mr. Wayne’s– uh- dumpster.” Peter said, feeling like a kicked puppy.

Alfred Pennyworth frowned, taking a few small steps towards Peter. Was he afraid that he would bolt? He really wanted to run, but he also really wanted to explain his way out of the situation. Maybe the butler wouldn’t call the cops if Peter explained.

“I’m not worried about the dumpster, dear boy, I’m worried about you. You are caked with bruises and blood.” he opened his stance a little, a move that showed comfort. He was trying to make Peter more comfortable. “May I know your name?”

Peter swallowed, licking his dry lips. He really wanted to ask Karen what the best course of action was here, but if he spoke out loud, he would seem insane. So he stayed quiet, hands curling up in his jacket pockets.

“Alfred Pennyworth has a record of being both trustworthy and reliable.”

It was like she read his mind. Hesitantly, he opened his mouth and spoke. “...Peter.”

Alfred smiled gently, extending a white gloved hand to the boy. “Peter, my name is Alfred Pennyworth, but please, just call me Alfred.”

Peter reached out and took his hand in a timid shake, closing the distance between them. His hand was so dirty he almost felt bad about potentially soiling the glove, but then he realized that Alfred probably had a dozen more pairs somewhere in the Manor.

“It’s nice to meet you, Mr. Pennyworth.”

The butler chuckled, grip both firm and comforting. Karen was right, this man seemed very trustworthy. Something about Peter told him that Alfred was his best source of help at the moment. It was probably why his tingle didn’t activate when the man stepped outside.

“Peter, might I interest you in a glass of tea? It won’t take long, and I’d like to check on any injuries you may have.” he offered carefully, slowly releasing the teen’s hand.

Peter chewed the inside of his mouth, glancing to the side of Alfred where the path wrapped back around to the front of the Manor. He could still run if he really wanted to.

But he trusted Karen, and Karen seemed to trust Alfred. Her judgment had never been wrong before.

“...tea sounds nice.”

#batman #spiderman #dc multiverse #marvel multiverse #marvel x dc #peter parker is trying his best #alfred pennyworth is the best #they will be happy #and then sad and angry #and then happy once more

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waitimcomingtoo · 7 months

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Wasn’t Me

Pairing: Peter Parker x Stark!reader

Synopsis: when Vision accidentally phases through your wall and catches you and Peter in the act, you try to stop it from spreading to everyone in the tower before Tony gets home

Masterlist

“Wait, this isn’t the kitchen.” Vision said as he accidentally phased through the bedroom wall. You and Peter froze at the sound of a third voice and slowly looked up. Every time you snuck off to have some private time with each other, you made sure to lock the door. But despite all your best efforts to keep your relationship a secret, neither of you accounted for Vision coming through the wall. Especially not when you were right in the middle of….something.

“Oh. Hello.” Vision said and gave you and Peter a polite wave. The act he had caught you did not seem to phase him at all while you and Peter were horrified.

“AHHHH.” You and Peter screamed at the same time. You rolled off of Peter and landed right on the floor while Peter grabbed a pillow and placed it over his lap.

“Forgive me for intruding, but I am looking for the kitchen.” She said to meet her in the kitchen.” Vision asked politely.

“Well you’re not gonna find it here!” You exclaimed as you threw your shirt back on.

“Dude! Get out! ” Peter shouted as he hastily tried to zip his pants.

“Oh, sorry, am I interrupting something?” Vision genuinely asked.

“YES!” You screamed like it was obvious.

“My apologies. I bid you both a good day.” Vision nodded curtly and disappeared back the way he came. You and Peter stayed in silence for a while as you processed what had happened.

“Do you think he saw us?” Peter asked to break the silence. You sat up from under him and gave him a look.

“Do I think he saw us?” You repeated slowly.

“Well do you?” Peter asked as you climbed back onto the bed.

“Are you kidding me? Of course he saw! The straw was already in the coconut. There’s no way he didn’t realize what was going on.”

“Maybe he thought we were just wrestling?” Peter shrugged weakly.

“Uh huh. Wresting with your dick out. Just like WWE.” You said sarcastically.

“Damn it. He definitely saw us. Do you think he’ll tell anyone?” Peter worried.

“He better not. My dad will kill you. And then vaporize your corpse. And then set the ashes on fire. And then blow them into a shrimp cocktail.”

“But I’m allergic to shellfish.”

“Exactly.” You whispered.

“Oh shit.” Peter gulped. “We need to go find Vision and make sure he doesn’t tell anyone.”

“Let’s go. He’s probably charging or in a bowl of rice or something.” You said and lead Peter out of the room. You went into the kitchen and found Vision at the breakfast table.

“Hey Vision.” Peter smiled awkwardly as you stood beside him.

“Hello, Peter.” Vision said politely.

“So, about the little snafu from before. We just want to make sure you don’t tell anybody about what you saw.”

“Yeah. Because it wasn’t what it looked like.” You added.

“Oh, no? It looked like the two do you were engaging in sexually explicit activity.” Vision replied. You and Peter exchanged a panicked look and tried to think of a way out of this.

“It looked like that, yes, but that’s not what we were doing.” Peter lied as you nodded along.

“Hm. That’s funny. I can detect heart rates and both of you appear to be lying.” Vision said with genuine curiosity.

“We’re not lying, silly.” You forced a laugh. “My heart is racing because I haven’t had any food yet but I drank a bunch of coffee.”

“You know women and their pumpkin spice lattes.” Peter added, earning himself a jab in the side.

“Watch it.” You said through a smile.

“And my heart just beats fast because I have the heart rate of a spider.” Peter added. “No lying here.”

“Oh, I see. But if you two weren’t engaging in sexual activity, what were you doing?” Vision questioned.

“Uhhh…” Peter scratched his head and tried to think of something.

“Peter was just choking on a pretzel and I was getting it out of his throat.” You jumped in.

“With your tongue?” Vision asked.

“Yes?” Peter said weakly.

“With your shirts off?”

“It’s a new technique.” You deadpanned.

“I’m not aware of this technique. Can you demonstrate on me?” Vision asked you.

“Absolutely not.” Peter snapped and stepped between you and Vision. Vision looked at Peter in confusion and you had to jump in again.

“Because it didn’t work.” You explained. “He still choked.”

“He seems fine to me. Although, I am detecting some slight discomfort in the abdomen.” Vision said as he looked Peter up and down.

“I have a tummy ache.” Peter admitted and patted his stomach.

“Would you like me to conduct a physical exam?” Vision asked and held up both his hands.

“No. I probably just have to fart.”

“Oh my God.” You groaned and rubbed your eyes.

“So are we cool? You’re not gonna tell anyone what you saw?” Peter asked Vision.

“We are cool. I will not be telling anyone what I didn’t see.” Vision confirmed.

“Okay. Good.” You sighed in relief.

“Except for Wanda.” He added. “Because I already told her. I tell her everything. I love her quite dearly.”

“Oh my God.” You groaned even louder.

“What did you tell her you saw?” Peter asked him.

“Just you were engaging in-“

“It wasn’t sexual activity!” You exclaimed. “He was choking and I was saving his life.”

“Then why was his penis out?” Vision asked Peter.

“Because…it…was… cold.” Peter said slowly, hating himself with every word.

“Oh my God. Both of you need to stop.” You stated. “Do you think Wanda going to tell anyone about what you thought you saw but didn’t actually see?”

“I’m not sure.” Vision replied. “You’ll have to ask her.”

“Fine. We can ask her.” You sighed and pulled Peter by the hand and brought him to where Wanda was reading on the balcony.

“I don’t want to. She’s scary.” Peter whispered to you.

“We have to talk to her and find out what she knows before she tells my dad.” You whispered back.

“I can whisper too.” Wanda whispered as she suddenly appeared behind the two of you. You both screamed and jumped apart as she laughed. You grabbed Peters hand and ran away, brushing past Natasha as you went.

“They’re a little odd, aren’t they?” Natasha chuckled as she watched you run by.

“They are.” Wanda agreed. “You know, Vision caught them doing it before.”

“What? No way.”

“Yeah. He said he accidentally phased through Peters bedroom wall and caught them.”

“Oh God. Yuck. New fear unlocked. That’s hilarious though.” Natasha laughed at the thought.

“What’s hilarious?” Steve asked as he came into the room.

“Vision caught Y/n and Peter doing it.” Natasha told him.

“What?” Steve laughed. “No way.”

“That’s what I said!” Natasha laughed.

“Honestly, I kinda figured they were doing it. They are the only two in the tower around that age. And lord knows Peter is hornier than an…animal with horns.” Steve said weakly when he couldn’t think of an animal.

“Rhino?” Wanda asked.

“I was thinking Triceratops.” Steve admitted.

“Wait, isn’t there a rule again dating on the team?” Nat asked. “At least, that’s what Tony tells me and Bruce every time we make eye contact.”

“If he had a problem with that, he’s definitely gonna have a rule against one of us dating his daughter. Especially Peter.”

“I thought Peter was a nice boy, no?” Wanda asked.

“He is.” Steve nodded. “But all Tony will see is that he’s a boy who Vision caught with his daughter. He’s gonna blow Peter into a million pieces.”

“I’m pretty sure that’s what Vision walked in on.” Wanda mumbled. From across the room, you and Peter were peeking out from behind a wall to watch them all talk.

“This is bad. They’re all laughing and saying our names.” Peter whispered to you.

“Do you think Wanda told?”

“I don’t know. What if she made them all see it with her mind powers?”

“Why would she do that?”

“Because she’s evil and not to be trusted!” Peter whispered harshly.

“We just need to talk to her and find out what she knows. Maybe she didn’t even believe Vision.”

“Do we have to?” Peter whined. “What if she enters my mind palace?”

“She wouldn’t find much.” You mumbled.

“What was that?”

“Nothing, sweetie.” You patted his cheek and pulled him out from behind the wall. Natasha and Steve had left at that point and Wanda had gone back to her book.

“Hey, Wanda.” You said with an awkward wave.

“Oh. Hello. I haven’t seen you two in forever. What have you been up to?” Wanda said sarcastically.

“Not much. Same soup, just reheated. You know the vibes. So, uh, we just wanted to talk to you about something. Something Vision might have said.” You began.

“Oh. You mean you two swallowing each other alive in Peters room?” Wanda asked. You and Peter exchanged a look and Peter let out a loud gulp.

“Vision doesn’t know what he saw.” You told her.

“Vision is made from the highest form of artificial intelligence. He knows everything.”

“Okay.” You said mockingly. “But he doesn’t know in this specific situation.”

“He’s programmed to access a situation down to every last detail in case there is a threat of danger. And it seemed the only threat of danger in Peters room that day was running out of oxygen. Or maybe a broken pelvis.”

“I’m flattered but I’m not that good.” Peter said humbly.

“He’s right. He isn’t.” You nodded in agreement.

“What was that?” Peter asked you.

“We just want to make sure whatever Vision told you about what he thinks he saw isn’t going to be told to anyone else.” You said to Wanda.

“Now hold on.” Peter tried to go back to what he had heard.

“Secrets safe with me.” Wanda smiled and zipped her lips.

“And me.” Bruce said from behind you. You and Peter whipped around and saw Bruce staring at you while eating a bowl of cereal.

“What?! Were you in here the whole time?” Peter asked.

“Yeah. Wanda, you are funny. How come I never noticed that?” Bruce chuckled.

“I’m not sure.” Wanda shrugged. “You tell me.”

“God damn it. Are either of you going to tell anyone what Vision saw?” You asked and pointed at Wanda and Bruce.

“I thought Vision didn’t see anything?” Wanda smirked.

“Right. Is anyone going to tell my dad about what Vision thinks he saw but definitely didn’t see?” You asked with a hopeful smile.

“Maybe? I don’t understand the question. Can you reword it? Or maybe write it down so I can see it?” Bruce asked.

“Oh my God.” You groaned. “I thought you were the smart one.”

“Ouch. Can you tell your girlfriend to stop being mean to me?” Bruce asked Peter.

“I’m not his girlfriend because we weren’t engaging in sexual activity because we’re not dating. Everyone got that?” You asked angrily.

“Got it.” Wanda nodded.

“No, sorry. Still confused. So you are dating but Vision didn’t catch you guys doing it?” Bruce asked so genuinely that you wanted to scream.

“No, he definitely did.” Wanda snorted. You looked at her in betrayal and she smiled apologetically.

“Oh. Now I get it. You guys are dating and Vision did catch you having sex.” Bruch realized. “But what are we not telling Tony?”

“No one is telling Mr. Stark anything. Everyone just keep your mouth shut about the activities, which may or may not have been sexual in nature, that Vision allegedly walked in on. Okay?” Peter exclaimed.

“My lips are sealed.” Wanda assured you. “Well, now they are. Because I already told Steve and Nat. But that was before you asked me not to tell anyone.”

“Oh my God. Find. Can we trust you?” You asked Bruce.

“I’m not gonna rat. Don’t worry.”

“Thank you.” Peter nodded. “You’re dismissed.”

“I don’t take orders from you.” Bruce snapped and walked away.

“Jesus Christ.” Peter whispered and felt genuinely offended by the tone. You took his hand and brought him away from Wanda to regroup.

“We need to get ahead of this before anyone else finds out we’re secretly dating.” You told him.

“You guys are secretly dating?” Sam asked as he came into the hallway, making you both jump.

“Damn it!” Peter shouted and hit the wall.

“Oh great. Captain fucking America knows now.” You grumbled.

“Since when are you two a thing?” Sam laughed and looked between you and Peter.

“Two months.” You admitted.

“Two months? And Tony still doesn’t know?”

“Do you think Peter would be alive right now if my dad knew?” You asked and gestured to Peter.

“That’s a joke, right?” Peter laughed nervously.

“I guess not.” Sam shrugged.

“Are you gonna tell my dad?” You asked him.

“No.” Sam replied.

“Cool. Thanks.” You sighed in relief.

“But only if-“

“Mother fucker.” You exclaimed now that there was a new obstacle.

“Only if you promise to never bring up that one time with the TV.” Sam continued.

“You mean when you got caught-“

“Zip it.” Sam cut you off. “Or I’ll tell Daddy Warbucks about your affair with Little Orphan Annie here.”

“This whole conversation has been wildly emasculating.” Peter mumbled.

“I never saw anything.” You told Sam.

“Good.” He nodded. “Then we have a deal.”

You went to shake hands when your phone started to ring. You looked at Peter curiously and pulled it out of your pocket.

“Hang on. Hello?”

“Hey short stack. I’m landing in 20 minutes. I can see that most of the team is in the tower today so I thought we could all have a nice, family dinner in the dining room. How does that sound?” Tony asked you through the phone.

“The entire team? In the dinning room? For dinner? Tonight?” You asked as panic grew in your chest.

“Are you playing a one man game of Clue? Just let everyone know, will you?” Tony asked.

“Sure, daddy. No problem.” You laughed nervously and looked at Peter with wide eyes.

“Thanks, peach. See you soon.” Tony said before having up.

“Shit balls.” You whispered once you were off the phone.

“Was that super good news?” Peter asked hopefully.

“My dad wants the whole team in the dinning room for family dinner.” You said and held your breath for his reaction.

“Son of a…” Peter started to shout and then quieted down, “shart mama.”

“I know. It’s bad.”

“This has gotten so out of hand. I’ve never taken this many L’s in a row. I don’t know if I can take anymore. My body is shutting down. I haven’t peed all day.” Peter said as he paced back and forth.

“Keep it together.” You said as you gripped his shoulders.

“Oh no. This is going to be so awkward.” Sam laughed at your misfortune.

“Why? Because everyone knows we’re secretly dating except for Mr. Stark and they also know Mr. Stark will kill them for knowing and not telling him right away so tonight will be a long, uncomfortable game of who tells him first?” Peter asked all in one breath.

“Yes, that’s exactly why.” Sam nodded and looked at Peter strangely.

“I don’t want to go.” Peter whispered and turned to you.

“We all have to go.” You told him. “He’ll get sus if we’re not all there.”

“But what if your dad kills me?” Peter whined.

“Then I’ll wait at least three months before getting a new boyfriend.” You smiled sweetly and patted his chest.

“You can do that but I’ll just haunt him and kill him in his sleep.” Peter smiled back.

“Oh my God. Come on. We have to go get ready for dinner.” You said and pulled Peter to your room.

30 minutes later, everyone was seated in the dining room with Tony at the head of the table. You and Peter nervously peered through the doorway to see what the set up was.

“What’s our plan?” Peter asked you.

“Sit far away from each other and diverge the conversation every time my dad gets close to happening upon the truth.”

“Okay. How hard can that be? We never get together for family dinner. They’ll all be talking so much that you and I won’t even come up.”

You and Peter took your seats at the table with you next to your dad and Peter further away. You made eye contact with Peter and nodded to let him know that you were in this together. Everyone stayed dead silent as the food was passed around and Tony was quick to notice.

“Why is everyone so quiet? Did Sam leave porn on the big TV again?” Tony asked as he chewed his food. You gulped and looked at Peter in a panic. You had been wrong about everyone talking and keeping the attention away from you. Instead, everyone was silent and tense since they didn’t want to be the one to let Tony know what Vision had seen.

“That was one time.” Sam defended.

“But how could we ever forget?” Tony teased him.

“I just wanted to watch Mama Mia. My eyes were burned.” Bucky said as he shut his eyes to keep out the memory.

“Let it go.” Sam said flatly.

“I don’t remember that.” You said robotically. Sam gave you a discreet thumbs up across the table.

“What? You were the one that found it.” Tony reminded you.

“Doesn’t ring a bell. I think you’re all remembering incorrectly.” You said with no much stiffness it sounded like you were reading from a prompter. Tony looked around the table and everyone avoided eye contact with him. They mindlessly pushed their food around their plates to look busy so that Tony wouldn’t ask them anything.

“Why is everyone acting weird?” Tony asked.

“What? We’re not. You’re being weird, dad.” You forced a laugh and patted Tony’s arm.

“Right.” Tony said skeptically. “So, Pete the treat. Any romantic interests at school?”

Everyone turned to stare at Peter, who was in the middle of taking a sip from his glass. Peter started choking on his water for a long time. No one made any effort to help Peter so he just sat there choking for an uncomfortably long period of time. Everyone stayed silent as he Peter coughed, turned red, and clapped his chest to try and get the water out. When he was finally done, he was crying and bright red.

“What?” Peter asked horsely.

“Peter doesn’t want to talk about girls, dad.” You laughed nervously. Everyone exchanged looks while also sneaking glances at you and Peter.

“He does with me. Come on. My dad never bothered with this stuff and I want to break the cycle. Tell me about your love life.” Tony insisted and playfully patted the table. You shot daggers at Peter and everyone turned to look at him. Peter felt sweat dripping down his forehead and smiled nervously.

“There’s no one, Mr. Stark. No girls.”

“I don’t buy that for a second. I can see the hormones brewing in your eyes. You’re sweating just at the thought of her. I know there’s a girl.”

“Maybe.” Peter squeaked out.

“See? I knew it. Tell me about her. She cute?” Tony asked. Peter looked at you for a brief second and quickly looked away.

“Yeah, yeah. She’s gorgeous. Really pretty.”

“She’s all right.” Sam shrugged, making everyone stifle a laugh as your jaw dropped.

“Fuck did you just say?” Peter snapped.

“I was kidding. Damn.” Sam held up his hands in defense.

“Damn, indeed.” Tony laughed. “Way to stand up for your girl, kid. She’s a lucky lady.”

“Thank you, sir.” Peter said and hoped that was the end of the conversation.

“You really are a good kid, Peter. I don’t tell you enough. I was just saying this to Pepper the other day, but if anyone is ever brave enough to try and date my daughter, I hope they’re like you.” Tony said sincerely. This time, you started choking as everyone murmured with amusement.

“Really?” Peter asked hopefully. He looked at you but you didn’t dare make eye contact.

“Yeah. Sure, you’re pretty annoying and way too eager at times, but you’re a good kid. You’re responsible, you care about other people, and you know how to get a decent haircut.” Tony continued.

“So you’d give Peter your blessing? If he and I ever wanted to date?” You asked skeptically.

“Absolutely not.” Tom said immediately.

“What?” Your face dropped. “But you just said-“

“I said I hope the person you date is like Peter.” Tony specified. “But Peter would never be allowed to date you.”

“Why not?” Peter asked and you shot him a look. Everyone else kept their heads down and turned away from Tony so he wouldn’t suspect anything.

“Not that I care. Psh. Peter is lame. I would never date Peter. Haha. But yeah, why not?” You asked your dad.

“Because he’s a superhero. And no daughter of mine is dating a superhero.”

“But you’re a superhero.” You pointed out. “And mom married you.”

“I know. That’s why I’d never allow you to go down the same path. I’ve missed hundreds dates, thousands of calls, and a million important moments because I was off being a superhero. I was saving the world but I was hurting the person I love most in the process. I don’t want that life for you. If Peter was an average guy off the street, I’d be thrilled to know you were dating him. But Peter isn’t average.”

“I know that.” You replied, starting to get annoyed now that your dad was trying to tell you that you couldn’t do something. You were already doing it, but he didn’t need to know that. He needed to know that he couldn’t make your choices for you.

“Ayo. Yeah she does.” Sam snorted. Everyone gasped and looked at him, making him freeze. You and Peter stared daggers at Sam who smiled sheepishly.

“Oops?”

“You little bitch.” You mouthed across the table at him. Tom noticed the way everyone reacted and grew suspicious. He looked at you and noticed you weren’t making eye contact. He then looked at Peter, who looked like he was about to pass out.

“What was that?” Tony asked Sam.

“Nothing.” Sam scoffed and went back to eating.

“Samuel. Tell me what you just said.” Tony said with an eerily calm smile.

“I don’t want to.” Sam whispered.

“Tell me or I will shove your wings so far up your ass-“

“I said she knows Peter isn’t average.” Sam admitted before Tony could finish his sentence. You buried your face in your hands while Peter chewed off all of his fingernails.

“What does that mean?” Tony asked and turned to you.

“I can confirm that as well.” Vision raised his finger as he spoke up. You and Peter looked at Vision in betrayal while everyone else stayed silent.

“Oh my God.” You whispered and rubbed your face.

“What? What’s the big red giant talking about?” Tony asked you again, sounding angry this time. Before you had a chance to think of something, Vision spoke up.

“I’m talking about how I accidentally caught them fornicating earlier today, sir. Also, am I required to be here? I can’t actually eat food.” Vision said politely. Everyone was dead silent as Tony processed what he was hearing. No one dared to look up from their plates or even move a muscle.

“You know what? Vision is right. We should actually all leave. And never return. Bye!” You said and got up from the table. Tony grabbed the back of your shirt and made you sit back down.

“Nobody move.” He said in a low voice. Silence fell over the table again as Tony slowly looked to Peter. That’s when he noticed that Peter had passed out and had his limp head in his dinner plate.

“Wake the son of a bitch up.” Tony ordered. Wanda lifted Peters head by his hair and a green bean stuck to his cheek and forehead.

“Peter?” Tony asked, but Peter didn’t wake up. Wanda shook him, then took his pulse to see if he was even alive.

“He’s unresponsive.” She reported.

“Jesus Christ.” You groaned to yourself as you watched Wanda and Steve try to wake Peter up.

“He peed his pants.” Steve announced, making you groan even louder.

“PETER!” Tony shouted as he banged on the table. Peter woke up and looked around in confusion. Tony slowly stood up and leaned over the table while staring daggers at Peter.

“Somebody tell me what’s going on.” Tony demanded. No one said anything, so you bit the bullet and stood up as well.

“Dad, Peter and I are dating. Vision caught us before and the whole team found out about it. That’s what’s going on, okay? Please, don’t kill my boyfriend.”

“What?” Tony asked as he slumped back in his seat. You couldn’t tell if he was angry or upset, but it was definitely not good.

“Sam was watching porn on the big screen!” You blurted and pointed to Sam.

“You said you didn’t see anything!” Sam pointed back at you.

“That was before you didn’t hold up your end of the deal!” You shouted.

“Shut up, both of you. Are you kidding me right now? You’re dating Peter Parker?” Tony asked in a calmer voice.

“Yes, daddy. I am. I have been for two months. We didn’t tell you because we knew you’d be mad and we just wanted some time together before you forced us apart. I wouldn’t normally lie to you like this but I knew you’d never allow us to be together and I love him. I just needed to love him for as long as I could before the world knew. I’m sorry. Please, don’t be mad at me.” You said as you took your dads hands. Tony stared at you for a long time and finally, put his hand on your cheek.

“I could never be mad at you, princess.” Tony said kindly. You smiled in surprise as Peter let out a sigh of relief.

“I’m gonna turn Peter inside out, though.” Tony said sweetly before lunging at Peter. He punched Peter right in the throat, making Peter collapse to the ground. You rushed to Peters side as Tony shook out his hand.

“Dad! You can’t hit him that hard. He’s only 5’8. He could’ve died.” You yelled at Tony as you pulled Peters head into your lap.

“That didn’t even hurt.” Peter wheezed out as he clutched his throat. Tony wound up to hit Peter again, but stopped when he saw something that surprised him. He watched Peter reached up and touch your face as he whispered to you that everything was going to be all right. He thought he had just been punched in the throat and was awaiting the punishment of a lifetime, his priority was to comfort you when you were upset. Tony then knelt down beside Peter and helped him sit up.

“I’m sorry, kid. I should not have hit you. It was a slight overreaction.” Tony sincerely apologized.

“Slight?” Peter croaked out.

“I just wasn’t expecting to come home to this news. But if it’s been two months and my daughter says she’s this in love, maybe I was wrong. Maybe it wouldn’t be as bad as I thought.”

“Mr. Stark, I know it’s probably hard to think about your daughter dating someone with a life as unpredictable as ours, but I don’t put anything above her. If I’m out on patrol, chances are, she’s hanging out on a rooftop with a walkie talkie telling me where to go. If I have to miss a date to take care of something, I take her with me. She’s my partner in all of this. I don’t leave her waiting around for a text back all night. She comes first.”

“Actually, “Vision began, “when I entered your room, it seemed as though Peter was going-“

“Do not finish that sentence, jumbo tampon.” You cut him off.

“You can trust me, Mr. Stark. You can trust us.” Peter said as he wrapped an arm around you. Tony looked between the two of you for a while but didn’t say anything.

“Please, daddy.” You whispered. Tony finally caved and smiled softly.

“Okay. You’ve convinced me. I’m not gonna kill Peter. You have my blessing, underoos.” Tony said as he helped Peter off the floor.

“Really? You’re not gonna force us apart?” You asked hopefully as you wrapped your arm around Peters.

“I’m not.” Tony confirmed. “You’re old enough to make your own decisions. But if he breaks your heart, he’s getting turned inside out. At least for a day. I cannot compromise on that.”

“Deal!” You clapped your hands before hugging your dad.

“Hold up, do I get a say in that deal?” Peter questioned.

“Don’t push your luck, kid. After what Vision walked in on you doing with Tony’s kid, you’re lucky to be alive right now.” Bruce said as he patted Peter on the back. Tony frowned as he pulled out of the hug.

“Hold on, what exactly did Vision walk in on?” Tony asked. Peter motioned for everyone to keep their mouths shut as Tony looked around the room. When no one answered him, he looked at you expectingly.

“So.” You laughed nervously. “Dessert, anyone?”

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