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piganatur · 1 year

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the eighth sense ep9-10

ok so this is very chaotic and long so everyone, brace yourself lol

After that gut-wrenching ending of ep8 we’re back in the therapist's office’s deep, underwater world. I love that there’s hardly any sound (and absolutely no music) whenever we’re in that office, it’s so silent as if it’s underwater, all is still. The sentence that sets Jaewon into motion, however, is his therapist telling him he’s selfish. That line literally pushes Jaewon not only to turn and face his therapist but to stand up and ‘protect’ himself against the statement. The only thing that can shake Jaewon is Jihyun (or the mere mention of him). He wants to protect Jihyun, but his therapist says he’s selfish for deciding things alone, for not considering Jihyun’s feelings, that’s basically the same as others hurting Jihyun. It’s an accusation of See? What you’re doing is what you want to protect him from

There are these lines that make me pause for a moment, giving me the urge to grip something bc 😩 Like Jaewon reasoning how he approached Jihyun first, what he literally says is ‘bc I reached my hands out to him first’ and I’m a weak bitch whenever it comes to hands (the mere mention of hands and I’m on the floor~) let it be holding, grabbing, not letting go of or reaching out and all their connotations so I’m just 😭😭😭😭😭 And now I’m thinking about Jaewon’s inability to see that he reached out first but Jihyun has been reaching out over and over again and maybe that only reminded him of this very first act, the one that, sometimes, he probably wished never even happened but what eventually saved him? (also, *vague hand gestures* it's a mirroring action-reaction kinda thing and I’m just *clenches fist*)

Not gonna lie, Jihyun scared me for a moment, being so inside his head and pondering so hard while walking with Joonpyo (like Jaewon’s vacant state got passed onto him BUT that’s another parallel so am I complaining? ofc NOT) friggin parallels and mirror conversations 😬😬😬 I’m just a shell of a person filled to the brim with t8s parallels now (should I make a post about all the parallels in all the episodes?? should I spiral into absolutely insane territory???)

As a viewer, it’s interesting to see Jihyun worry and actually waver (on a surface level) because of what Eunji told him (that Jaewon won’t even mention nor talk about him, like Jaewon talks about ANYTHING with Eunji… wow okay I’m sorry but this is too funny I share more connection with a roadside snail than these two did in the rekindled version of their relationship no.2) That scene shows just how inexperienced and young Jihyun is while simultaneously telling about his character growth and his response to fear (much like his final conversation with Jaewon about being afraid and maybe I’ll write an overall analysis about that, about overcoming fear in t8s but now it’s still just a scattered mess inside my head and I’m really not in any state to try and get into Jaewon’s head anytime in the near future so….)

I love LOVE the club room discussion: ◦ first Jihyun wordlessly comforting Jaewon, not letting go of his hand, ◦ then shouldering all the blame so the surfing club can get re-approved, ready to give up something if that means, in turn, giving something to Jaewon, ◦ and then Yoonwon showing vulnerability – these are the scenes that make t8s so special to me… the buildup in this scene, the little things following each other that make Jaewon snap out of his stoic state to comfort a friend because he is a caring person and Yoonwon is his friend… these particles build on each other to push Jaewon to react, to move and do something (much like Jihyun finding - w/ the help of Joonpyo - Jaewon’s pictures and realising that Jaewon did not give up on photography and that fact propelling him to support Jaewon’s dream and giving him another camera?) It’s all action and reaction, some clear and loud, some like these snippets ready to get connected to reveal their final meaning

And I love that when Jihyun gifted the new camera the backdrop of that scene is a cluttered rock wall, all these one-of-a-kind entities of different sizes and forms backing them up from behind, when Jaewon is still at the point where he tries to piece his life together.

And Jihyun waits for him at a boulder that’s separate from the rest, where Jaewon joins him and then Jihyun gives him something precious and leaves. Jaewon stays there, because after everything that went down, much like Jihyun, that singular boulder is a certain and unshakable place. And he accepts what Jihyun gave him.

So when Eunji kisses him, Jaewon sees with his own eyes that what he does is actively hurting Jihyun because finally FINALLY he looks at Jihyun and what he sees is the pain he inflicted. It dawns on him, in that moment, that his actions are causing Jihyun harm, and that’s exactly what he wanted to protect Jihyun from. So he does what his therapist said and works on himself first (and I love how the creators play with/and portray time without blatantly stating how much of it passes)

Also, Eunji pls sit down and stop saying Jaewon is back in his right mind. He has changed clothes like once in the past 2 weeks ffs… Oh, but Jaewon throwing that same line back to her face? I apologise, I wasn’t in my right mind yoooooooooooooooooo

When Jaewon said We’re done I was already cackling. Followed by the you’ve worked hard ...let’s agree that he was NOT talking about their assignment shdhgfhdhg. Another perfect establishing line for the following scene (also, Jaewon served in the navy?? he is i n s a n e)

But back to Jaewon's road to realisation…Sajangnim is so real and I appreciate her every second I see her (also, like, everyone can be an oppa as long as they’re handsome😉). She literally beats some sense into Jaewon lol. It wouldn’t be the same if someone didn’t get boinked on the head with a spoon, that’s the sk experience~~~

The fact that both Jihyun and Jaewon were heavily led in the direction of finding answers by the advice of WOMEN *can I get an AMEN?* yes, I’m back at my women portrayed in t8s shit again

lmao I’m sorry but that Conan Gray song doesn’t even play for 0.3 seconds and Jihyun is already like yo Joonpyo do u know this song it’s so nice? hahaha but seriously,

I really like that Jaewon walks to Jihyun because walking with purpose is soooo powerful. He makes his way steadily and with determination towards happiness. He doesn't need to run, there is no need for that rush of urgency bc we always see these flashy and big actions portrayed as the picture of ultimate declaration (of yearning/wanting/striving for a better existence) when in reality, the quiet and sure things are just as valid, and often filled with more power.

The first time Jaewon unconsciously wandered (through roads he previously took w/ Jihyun) back to the samgyeopsal restaurant it made him smile, his heart led him there. This time however, he makes that choice consciously, he chooses to go to Jihyun and his every step is filled with that decision and with dedication...to pursue Jihyun and pursue happiness because Jihyun IS happiness to Jaewon and once his mind no longer fights it, going to Jihyun and trying is the simplest and most reasonable thing to do. The magic of Jaewon’s power walk is the conscious gravity of that realisation, of that act.

while watching the opening of ep10 all I could think of was t8s 🤝 tms: starts off teasing (the whole season) with clips that only happen in the last ep

If I’m honest, out of all the episodes, ep9-10 were the choppiest, but I get it, they had a lot to cover. There’s no swell, no smooth transition between the scenes, just a wave we climb and when it’s gone we hop onto another wave. Also, the experience of the last ep is akin to reading a c-webnovel where you get to the extras after the main story’s end… well, ep10 is all those extras combined:

◦ idk call me petty but Taehyung and Eunji are toxic people, I wouldn’t want them in my life for anything. Jaewon forgiving them is one thing bc it gives him closure but I hope as hell he cuts those two snakes out for good ◦ Jihyun’s dilemma of when was our first day (as a couple) is so ‘dating and romantic relationships in sk 101’ ◦ ily tipsy Jihyun, ily unruly Jaewon

I love everything @emotionallychargedtowel said in this post (thank you for the wonderful observations, your gripes are valid, I have even more lol) especially the bit about wanting, asking for, or expecting a certain level of care from the important people in our lives, Jiyun’s game, and the pursuer-distancer bit OMG THANK YOU FOR WRITING THAT!!! Jihyun’s game is my fav moment from the last two eps (closely followed by the opening sequence of ep10), it tells so much about his attitude and dedication towards their relationship

And on this note, I agree 120% with everything @emotionallychargedtowel and @jemmo wrote about the complexity of their relationship showed by the ‘twist to conventional roles' (and might I add, not just in queer romance but in romance as a genre too) Not me thinking about my post about Jaewon and Jihyun both actively romancing each other because for equality in a relationship, there has to be space for the ppl involved to move around, and at times, switch places (like taking care of one’s partner, be the one to woo them… then being taken care of, being wooed and so on) because it’s a dance where they take turns to lead depending on the situation because they both want this, because they feed into each other’s happiness.

Jaewon teases Jihyun, establishing again and again that he knows Jihyun is young, younger than Jaewon himself but he does NOT patronise Jihyun for it. It’s an indulgent way of acknowledging his bf’s youth while fully regarding him as an adult. And whenever Jihyun tries to downplay their age gap, whenever he puts them on the same standing with the casual slips of banmal, Jaewon is so happy to be treated like a friend, like someone of the same age as Jihyun. He doesn’t try to use his hyung status as leverage… it’s a balancing act, it is give-and-take and letting Jihyun give back and letting himself receive just as much because Jaewon appreciates Jihyun and takes him seriously as a person, not just as a cute younger boyfriend in need of doting on.

Then I saw this post from @jemmo and I’m !!!!!!!!

will you meet me more than halfway? 😭😭😩😩

Thank you for sharing that song and that particular line bc isn’t that what Jihyun did again and again, meeting Jaewon more than halfway?? Even at the end of ep9 he waited for Jaewon and when he saw him, he went down to meet him in front of the dorms. Jihyun took that extra step, once again meeting Jaewon more than halfway and ever since watching that scene my chest is so full

All in all, The Eighth Sense is a beautifully crafted, though evoking drama, full of passion and love apparent from its detailed and consistent plotline, believable three-dimensional characters, exceptional quality and cinematography. It made me kinda obsessed for 5 weeks and evoked thoughts and feelings I have not experienced since To My Star: Our Untold Stories. Everyone involved in making this drama deserves praise and an enormous round of applause 👏👏👏👏 Very well done 💕💕💕

#this drama will keep living in my head rent free #여덟번째 감각 #the eighth sense #i've been meaning to write this for days now #this is once again awfully long #not @me when I saw jaewon dipping his feet INTO THE HAN RIVER he is actually fearless beyond belief #but yeah i know #it was him desperately wanting to reconnect with the good and wonder that trip and jihyun introduced him to and not the trauma it gave #and water is his medium #always has been #i know #that transition was a beautiful visual perception but...the HAN RIVER #yuu pls move on #also i didnt even remember clearest blue was in heartstopper lol my frail brain cant remember shit

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bylertruther · 2 years

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nancy says ily to keep the peace with steve bc at that point in time she still hadn't grappled with what growing up with parents in a loveless marriage did to her and still hasn't accepted herself for who she really is and what she really wants, and

mike doesn't want to say i love you and avoids it for almost a year despite hearing it all the time from el, because he doesn't want to lie to keep the peace like his parents (specifically his mom), but he also doesn't want to discuss The Issue of why he's still in that relationship despite not feeling that way.

part two of this delves into sexuality which is where i'm gonna lose some of you, but...

it's easier for nancy to play her part and say ily, because even if she isn't in love with steve, she still likes him and feels attracted to him. it doesn't have the same emotional weight to it for her as it does him, but she can still participate convincingly.

it's not as easy for mike to play his role and say ily, because he doesn't love her like that and despite being physically there in their interactions, he's not totally Mentally there.

we see this in 4x02 where he's too busy focusing on will and his every mood and move, but not noticing when el is in clear distress despite being glued to his side. (he can tell when will breathes differently once, but doesn't think anything of el's caught in the headlights look or her stammering as she says she doesn’t want to go? were just supposed to gloss over that? lol. ok.) it also doesn't help tht we see them from will's pov where they look giggly n happy, but when we see them from angela's pov they look like they're just there, chilling.

the physical interactions they have after act one aren't super intimate or intense either, and they don't feel too different from when we saw them from angela's pov. even when lucas and max are just standing next to each other, they still feel more couply than those two (and that's with lucas and max being broken up and just friends right now, too, lmao).

to bring up previous evidence of this, i'd also like to submit all of season three. they've supposedly been making out in her room from sunrise to sunset, but el doesn't know anything about herself or what it means to be a human being with your own interests and taste. mike also doesn't seem to know much about her other than she's a brave superhero that likes eggos and shouldn't overwork herself. put that all together and you get the impression that all they did was kiss like hopper said. they never had actual conversations of any value.

every other couple and even friendship on the show can tell you qualities about the other and what they like or don't like--we've seen this time and time again, but never for these two. (S4 literally has every other couple, including by|er, express what they love abt the other person to contrast it with them. mike can't say anything he likes abt el other than her powers and how she saved the world twice [which max said btw], urging her to be their superhero once more [and using other people's words again as he does so]. you're supposed to notice the difference, how one is not like the others, and it's especially hammered home when his speech splits hawkins in four. love did not save the day for once, because this time.. it wasn't true.) even when they're alone, we see mike struggle and evade being emotionally intimate with her and el is left more confused than when they started. their season four fight is the closest they get to their first ever serious conversation post-season one, but as soon as it gets Too Serious and requires him to be honest about his emotions, mike clocks out again.

mike is there in the flesh, yes, but not there-there.

compare this to steve and nancy, where nancy's "bullshit" outburst and inability to say ily and mean it this last time take him by surprise, because everything else made him feel like it was requited. she was there in every way a person can be, and she liked him, so he doesn't understand where this is coming from and assumes he must've done something at first. this is why he goes to say sorry with roses in hand afterward until he later on sees how she acts around jonathan and realizes what her having those feelings for someone really looks like.

mike's physical distance isn't what drives el to realize her suspicions were warranted. it's the fact that he isn't there physically ("the way you looked at me...") and emotionally ("you never say it") that makes her feel wholly unloved. she can't feel his romantic affections through his writing, his words, or his body--nowhere is she receiving it and she wants him to be honest about it for once. she knows that he cares about her, but she doesn't feel any romantic love from him anymore now that they've moved out of that tween puppy love doing-nothing-but-kissing-all-day phase and into what she considers a more serious relationship.

and when mike is then later on talking around his dilemma with will, he doesn't talk about love or romance at all! he just talks about needing to be needed by her and how her relying on him makes him feel like less of a loser. bc mike needs other people and hates that, hates that he needs them but they don't need him. bc mike is scared that if she doesn't need him, then no one does, and why would they? bc mike thinks he's a loser with nothing to offer and no one to love him and it doesn't help that he's heard it from everyone, too. troy, ted, kids at school, and even lucas. el is canonically the first girl that's ever not been grossed out by him. if she exits his life, then what does that make him? it proves that everyone else was right about him. and while mike doesn't want to be popular and is a proud member of hellfire, he still wants what everyone else wants: to be normal, to be a person that's liked, to be found worthy as he is.

he describes el as superman landing on his doorstep, dumb luck, and others describe her as the first girl to ever like him as a person. she's what he perceives as his one chance at being normal, the one person in all his years that he thinks has ever liked him like that. of course he can't give her up, even if he refuses to lie to her by telling her he loves her. of course he's going to will himself to fit in this spot that is simply not made for him no matter how hard he tries.

and while there's always a chance that it couldn't swing this way, i think that his journey is going to be much like nancy's. he'll reach a point where he can no longer pretend and he's going to come clean. he's going to stop playing it safe, stop trying to make himself fit where he doesn't, and will himself to be brave enough to want what he wants and go for it.

because will is the one with shared interests, shared goals, shared history. will is the one with whom he can talk without ever having to actually talk, who can look at him and know exactly what he needs but won't ever ask for. will is the one that he trusts with his emotions, even the most mortifying ones of all. will is the one that he’s always waiting on, always wanting to hear from, always considering his equal partner against the world. he's the one that mike separates from their other friends, the one that hawkins simply isn't the same without, and who he says the past year has been weird without. will is the one he always knows exactly what to say to and who he never chokes up with. he can tell will exactly what he means to him and how important and irreplaceable he is to mike, without will ever having to beg for it. will grills him and mike immediately rises to the challenge, spilling his unfiltered truth at will's feet. will wasn't dumb luck; no, their relationship is the best thing mike's ever done.

it has always been will, for mike. mike just keeps retreating or, perhaps as is more accurate now, getting pulled "back to the safety" of el. el, who he likes, cares for, and thinks so highly of, but doesn't love like that. because he's "harder to read". because he's ultimately "afraid of what would happen if [he] accepted [himself] for who [he] really [is]". he's scared to open up like that, especially to the person he cares about the most, because what if she doesn't like the truth?what if superman looks at him and doesn't like what she sees when he's no longer pretending? who is he, what is he, if he breaks the heart of the hero that's saved them all and the world countless of times when she didn't have to? when she never asked for that? who is he to break the heart of the girl he and everyone else owes their lives to? he can't do that. of course he can't do that--not to her, not a "loser" like him of all people.

he thinks that keeping the band-aid on is an act of mercy, because he doesn't yet realize that eleven wants out. she wants to find out who she is and be seen as that girl and loved for it. he thinks this is what she wants, because will (who has no idea of the clusterfuck that is their relationship) tells him so and he believes anything will tells him, because will never lies and he trusts him more than anyone including himself. because he felt the intensity of will's love for him in that van, was reminded of it when el was on her death bed, and responded to it, but ultimately did nothing when el then didn't discuss it afterward.

when he sees that this is no longer what she wants, when he sees that his "selfishness" won't hurt her as much as he thinks it will, that's when he'll allow himself to want what he wants. because sometimes the scariest thing in the world, the most unspeakable thing in the world, isn't actually as scary or unspeakable as you once thought it was. sometimes, the truth is exactly what the people you care about the most want.

he'll get there, in time, just as his sister did. in every season he's always the last one to arrive, always late to whatever it is, but this time... he'll be on time. he'll say and do whatever it is he needs and it won't be too late. it won't tighten the metaphorical vines around will's throat. it won't split hawkins in four. this time, love, true love, will save the day. (crazy together + you said yes + i think it'll be easier if we're a team + let's start a new party, me and you)

#byler #mine #this looks bite sized on my phone bt im sure its the ugliest wall of text ever on desktop. rip 🤡#anyway bitches be thinking sometimez when they should be studying for their exam 🤔 hmmmmmmmm

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heretherebedork · 2 years

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(Not anon btw 🙆‍♀️)

Lmao, I tried to catch up with Gen Y -> or actually to start it altogether 🙈), but Pok & Tong are hilarious in their toxicity! 😂 They’re really making the viewers wait nearly 2 seasons for a couple that has touched all bases multiple times to have their first kiss? Only for that kiss to come when the person that used to be screwed over screws over the other one…in the biblical (rather than the literal) way? 💀 I mean should I even start this show, or should I blacklist it out of precaution? 😶

…or was the one that’s always screwed over, screwed over once again? 🤔 Aargh…! What is it with this show?! They should call it Gen Why instead of Gen Y! 😖

Is it Stockholm Syndrome perhaps? 🧐 If you keep staring it PokTong long enough, you just cease to notice that they’re pretty toxic to each other? 🥴 Or were the compilation videos on YouTube not enough to “capture” their essence? 🤠 bc so far I don’t see many differences with the likes of TT 🤭

I... okay. Look. Are Pok and Tong perfect? No. Are they what I would consider anywhere near as toxic as TharnType? No. Uh. Not at all.

I feel like we might have watched different shows, honestly?

If we go back to the beginning, this was about Pok having a crush on Tong and Tong not reciprocating. And then Tong, off-screen, slowly realizing that he cared about Pok and making a choice to cheat for him, which ended with Pok getting beaten up and pulling out the revenge card on a very guilty Tong.

Is it perfect? No. Is it the same as Tharn and Type and the literal rape scene? No. Tong sets limits, no kissing on the mouth. Pok pushes but very deliberately never breaks those limits AS SET and when Tong pushes him away he accepts it (reluctantly but he does stop every time.)

Then they move in together and when Pok feels like he can't take it he literally tells Tong to leave and Tong insists on staying. There is still no kissing on the lips because Tong has set that as a strict boundary due to his guilt and his inability to move forward in their love with the truth about the cheating hanging over their head.

Again, they aren't perfect but Tharn and Type's relationship was unsupportive, awful, filled with lack of consent and filled with a constant sense of unease and dislike. Pok and Tong are two young men in a complicated dance of friendship, love, cheating, revenge, hurt and pain.

I mean, I can keep going and explaining the relationship to you but, frankly, if what you've seen of them leads you to want to blacklist them... do it. They're one of my favorite couples and are in the process of what I consider a beautiful emotional maturation on both sides.

Honestly, I don't know which one of them gets 'screwed over' every time because they both have had issues with each other and with their relationship and their difficulties in speaking the truth. Probably Pok, who I do definitely sympathize more with because he lost that trophy and he's struggled so much and feels (understandably) betrayed and is now working back to trust with the understanding that Tong was trying to help... while, at the same time, Tong is learning that helping and kindness need to be wanted by the person he's trying to help.

I actually really love the way they waited for their first kiss and the pain it came out of because it came from the truth finally being revealed and Tong finally feeling like he can be honest with his feelings even as Pok's heart is breaking because it all feels like a lie.

I've never watched the compilation videos. I don't know. But, for me, they're two hurt and scared teenagers who are deeply in love but keep acting without thinking and acting on that hurt and that fright.

Tong was afraid Pok might not pass and be able to join him at University so he cheated.

Pok was hurt badly due to Tong's actions and missed his qualifying race and, out of that hurt but also that love, insisted on keeping Tong close to him.

Tong was hurt and in love and aching and when Pok tried to send him away insisted on staying because he does love Pok he just doesn't know how to say or to be forgiven.

The start of season 2 was beautiful, a veneer of love over their pain and their cracks and their lies. But it wasn't enough because there was no foundation. It wasn't healthy, it wasn't perfect... but as toxic as Tharn and Type? Not for me.

#poktong #pok x tong #tongpok #tong x pok #gen y 2 #gen y #gen y the series #gen y season 2 #gen y 2 the series #no seriously they're still one of the my favorite couples ever #i cannot even see the start of that level of toxicity #so sorry?#i guess?#not sure why you'd send this to me knowing that i'm a huge fan and have been since day 1 #like i kind of get it?#but here's my defense and explanation

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hansolmates · 3 years

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(secret) lovers | m

summary; the (not) best friends 2 lovers spin-off where jungkook and you are trying to hide your relationship from his old best friend pairing; jungkook x reader (f) genre/warnings; established relationship, jiyu is now an old friend and mc went to high school w them, weeb!koo, jk n mc be kinda stanky bc they’re only going to this party for the free booze, soft dom!mc, switch!koo, whiny koo, mc calls jk a slut, cockwarming, gets really soft n’loving at the end, heavy use of the pet name [redacted] i really think this couple is meant to be diabolically dumb together w/c; 2.7k a/n; this couple is really out here living rent free in my mind. jk, mc and jiyu really just are that thruple that i love to hate and hate to love. hope u enjoy this lil spin off!

[series masterlist]

“You made it!”

Jiyu flings her hands out, knocking both your heads with hers in the middle in a surprisingly strong hug. It’s a complete episode of déjà vu, from the way her body smells like the peach lotion she used after gym class to the shade of coral lipgloss. From the corner of your eye, you can see the caramel brunette’s tiny face is inching closer towards your ride, her head tucking in the crook of his neck.

“Jiyu,” you beam. You’re the first to speak, the first to dip their toe in the water. “You look great!”

“Thank you!” she pulls away, popping her hip against the doorway. The silky material of her coverup gleams in the sunlight, the silvery material showing off the silhouette of her bikini-clad body. Despite the fact that you’re the one who compliments Jiyu, her gaze floats over to the person next to you, “what a coincidence you two came at the same time and—oh my, and where are my manners! Come in, come in!”

She moves away from the door, revealing an ornate lobby and two twin stairwells. You can’t help but light up at the beautiful crystal chandelier, flecks of pink and blue flickering in your eyes. Further down the hallway you spot open glass doors that lead to a large backyard that overlooks the lake. Some people are already sitting by the dock, lounging about with drinks and happy smiles on their faces.

“Actually,” Oh, he speaks. You think with a small smile on your face, side eyeing the man of the minute, “I forgot the rest of my luggage. We’ll meet you inside.”

“Okay!” Jiyu smiles, “I’ll make you guys some drinks.”

As soon as the door shuts, Jeon Jungkook, your boyfriend for three years blurts out, “She still has a crush on me.”

You snort, taking off the duffle bag that’s hiding behind your back. Continuing to stand awkwardly at the front door, you prepare yourself to console your boyfriend’s worries. “She still has heart-eyes for you, Koo,” you tease, pinching his side.

His eyes are big and swimming with guilt, “We should tell her.”

“Oh, baby. We can’t break her heart this weekend.”

“But love, it’s her birthday.”

“Exactly,” you chirp, bumping your head against his arm, “can’t break her heart on her birthday.”

Jiyu is an old high school friend. Class president, straight As, and even vied for prom queen. The only thing she wasn’t able to obtain throughout her high school years was Jeon Jungkook, the object of her affections. They were best friends in elementary school, eventually turning into distant friends as their interests changed and they got older. Yet, Jiyu still tried to insert herself into Jungkook’s life. Back in high school it was surely cute, the way she’d pine from the back of the room and place anonymous love letters in his locker, but Jungkook wasn’t interested and avoided any of her advances. Fast forward ten years later and it seems like old flames never die out.

The meetups with Jiyu have been scarce since college and only in large groups. As former class president, she decided to hold a little reunion for her old friends, taking advantage of her stellar job benefits. A weekend in the woods, perfectly balmy and far away from the city.

“I don’t wanna lie,” Jungkook nearly whines, pink lips warbling at your inability to budge.

“Mm,” you hum, tracing the fingers across the seam of his back pocket. His boardshorts hide nothing, and you curl your fingers around the swell of his plump bum, “be good for me and tell a little white lie, will you?”

Jeon Jungkook, former President of the Anime Club, prom king candidate and your favorite nerd in the entire world.

A teeny tiny lie won’t hurt anyone. After all, you haven’t seen your high school buddies in literal years, and they wouldn’t dare bother to make a fuss about your relationship. In fact, they don’t know of your relationship with Jungkook. The two of you reconnected randomly, some spontaneous holiday party Kim Seokjin is always inclined to throw. You barely made eye contact the first two hours into it, not really wanting to go back to the hellhole that was your late teenage years. Nevertheless, by the end of the night the two of you couldn’t help yourself.

As you look around the room with utmost confidence, the two of you have made the finest glow up by far. At first you wanted to keep the white lie to save face, you don’t owe anyone an explanation as to how you and the President of the Anime Club hooked up. However, you’re starting to enjoy the ruse.

Jungkook’s sitting on the other side of the backyard, looking absolutely delicious as he sips on whatever fruity cocktail he created. Judging from yours, you have a feeling his drink probably consists of 95% orange juice and 5% alcohol.

Jiyu and him are sitting in the large netted hammock, swinging lightly. Gravity is doing its thing, and Jiyu is practically laying on top of Jungkook’s lap, her body pooling to where his meets in the middle. As soon as his thigh touches hers, his eyes flicker to you in panic. He’s shirtless, only with a pair of mid-cut shorts to protect him. The skin that touches him probably burns.

You wink and wave him away, assuring him it’s fine. Pretending to flip your hair, you turn back to the conversation you’ve been ignoring for the past five minutes. “Man, Jungkook’s so sexy,” Im Nayeon cooes, looking longingly at Jungkook’s form.

“Jiyu’s so lucky,” Rina eggs on, taking another shot from the tray (a tray for herself, you might add.)

“Do you think Jiyu’s gonna get some birthday sex tonight?”

Nayeon snorts, covering her flared nostrils with her hand. That hand eventually loops around your thigh, eagerly pushing you two together by pressing on the meat of your bare skin. “If she’s lucky! Besides, we all know Jungkook had that big crush on you junior year!”

Her pretty bunny teeth tease you, and you can’t help but smile back in return. “What do you mean, he really liked me?” you ask innocently.

“Oh yeah! Drew so many little pictures of you in the margins. Little anime versions of you in his favorite outfits.” Of course, you know about Jungkook’s old crush on you. He’s mentioned it in passing, paired with an adorable blush on his cheeks. Hearing it from Nayeon, the shameless grin on her lips and the ease of champagne on her breath is much more entertaining. “Rina, do you remember when Jungkook set up her desk with rose petals and chocolate in a little heart? And then in the morning the janitor sweeped it up? He was so sad!”

“Yes! I really felt for him,” Rina pouted.

“Oh, poor baby,” you didn’t know that bit of information. You put a hand over your heart, watching as Jungkook shares a drink with his old friend Kim Mingyu. He looks so different, yet all the same since you’ve been acquaintances in high school. He carries his own weight now, an air of confidence that he’s finally reached over time.

“Definitely not a baby anymore,” Rina scoffs. She clicks her tongue back to where Jungkook is seated.

The sun is doing wonders for him, highlighting every crevice of where his biceps curl and twist as he lifts his hand in another drink. Their side of the lawn is doing a toast. For what, you don’t know. You do know however, that Jiyu is trying very hard to cheer right over Jungkook’s thighs, spilling some liquid over his knees. You smirk when Jiyu sends him an apologetic grin, dabbing a napkin up and across his thighs, far away from the wet spot.

Jungkook, the poor guy, discreetly shoves her off. He brushes his hands and gets up, letting Jiyu fall back in the hammock all by herself. Avoiding the teasing gazes of his friends, he looks into the lake, hiding his blush.

Still a baby, you think. Your baby.

“Jiyu was practically sitting in your lap, baby boy,” you card your hand through his dark locks, fresh and shiny from the shower. The feeling is soothing to Jungkook’s scalp until you tug, arching his neck towards your lips and twisting, “did you like that,” you mumble into his Adam’s apple, “my little slut?”

“N-no! Never, ohgodnever—” Jungkook is sweating, fat beads rolling down his hairline and glistening across his face. His fingers are practically phasing through your skin, the crescents of his fingernails sinking into the swell of your bottom.

You clench around his dick, your soft folds urging Jungkook closer to his release. But he knows better not to move, and instead shudders from the ministrations, breaking apart from you to dip his head into your chest. His nose pokes at the bouncy flesh, nuzzling into your breast like the softest pillow.

“Sh-shit, love,” he cries into your skin, “you feel so warm n’soft.”

“You need to be quiet, baby,” you murmur, playing with the curls that hang around the nape of his neck, “unless—you want someone to hear? My little slut wants everyone to hear that I’m fucking you?”

“Mm, no,” you grin at his honest reaction, and you can feel his neck heating up at the thought. Your fingers make their way, finally ending towards the apples of his cheeks. You squish lightly, loving the way his tanned skin puffs under your fingers. “I’m—ah—not a slut. I just really love you, only you. Really wanted to hold you in my lap today and show you off,” he whimpers at the unconscious clench of your folds, “just uh—slut for you, love.”

You giggle, tightening your thighs around your boyfriend’s tiny waist. Your other hands trail down to the ridges of his abdomen, where you two are connected. You absolutely love the way your thighs wrap around his lean waist.

Jiyu split the floors by girls and boys, as if you’re still in high school. It took forever for everyone to fall asleep, but you managed to sneak away with your bare feet slapping against the hardwood floor. Call yourself needy, but you couldn’t imagine yourself falling asleep with at least one good night kiss. Jungkook was ten steps ahead of you. Your boyfriend was already naked when you arrived, pumping his cock across the bed and getting himself ready for you. His eyes instantly zeroed in on you in his shirt, the black material hanging off your shoulder and begging to be pulled away by his teeth.

“If I crawled in your lap today,” you murmur into his shoulder, “our whole secret would’ve been thrown out the window.”

“I wouldn’t have minded, even if Jiyu got hurt,” Jungkook admits, running his hands up and down your back, “I wanna marry you, y’know.”

You freeze in your ministrations, suddenly feeling the room go cold. Not in an unpleasant way, but the room freezes, the blue-white light of the moon igniting the seriousness in Jungkook’s gaze. You force yourself to stay on his lap, let his cock settle between your folds. The juices of your coupling are dripping down each other’s legs, cooling at your thighs and onto the white blankets.

“You wanna marry me?” you echo, running your thumbs across his shiny lips.

Of course, you’re at that age. Everyone around you is getting married, heck many people your age are already in the middle of creating a family, going on vacations to Disney and picnics in the playground. And yes, you also have thought about marrying Jungkook, he’s the only man you can picture marrying. Yet, hearing it out loud and from him only further fuels your desire to make these thoughts a reality.

He kisses your thumbs, lips smushing against the pads. “Of course I do, love. You’re it for me.”

You relinquish, slowly pulling yourself off of him. He’s still hard as you untack yourself, his member slapping against his belly button as he watches you in confusion. You make a show of fluffing up the pillows, arching your back and wiggling your ass as you make yourself comfortable to lay on your back.

“Show me, baby,” you spread your legs for him, gesturing for him to come closer with a curl of your finger, “show me how much you want to marry me.”

Jungkook smirks, hands immediately pumping with a squelching sound resulting from yours and his combined arousal. You love it when Jungkook takes the lead, just as much as you do. It makes you feel like a pillow princess, especially when you feel lovey sex is on the way. “Will you be quiet? Just like you tried to make me quiet?” he rasps, wrapping a hand around your waist to arch you up.

“Depends on how good you are.”

The head of his dick rubs against your clit, slapping lightly at the shiny skin. You both moan when he finally gives you what you both need. As soon as the tip of his dick sinks down, you feel like you’ve both hit home. It doesn’t take long for him to find his pace, naturally throwing your leg over his shoulder for added leverage.

“Oh—fuck, baby,” you tug at his hair, pulling him in for a wet kiss. You don’t care that you’re slobbering all over him, the bed creaking and squeaking against his minstraitions. “I—uh, you feel so deep—yes!”

“When we’re married I’ll fuck you every day like this, love,” he whispers between your lips, thrusting in a particularly sensitive spot that has you arching your back and pulling your chest to his, “I—ugh, I love you so much.”

“Love you. Love youlovelove—ah! Kook, I’m—”

The two of you don’t spare any time, the sun will eventually rise and you’ll be back to playing strangers. Jungkook pounds you into the mattress, nails you with enough cum for you to last the next day without having to sneak into each other’s room like horny teenagers. The roughness is smoothed out by love and bliss, eager at the thought of going home and anticipating a permanent life together.

Five minutes later, you’re starting to feel a little too sticky. “Ohmygod—I need to fucking pee,” you pull yourself away from Jungkook’s sweaty body, palming around for your t-shirt.

“Just pee on the bed,” Jungkook grins.

“You’d like that, wouldn’t you,” you make a face, “nasty.”

“You like that I’m nasty.”

“Yeah yeah.”

With one last kiss, you skip away from his bedroom and close the door behind you. Unfortunately, as soon as you take five steps in the direction of the bathroom, somebody emerges from the shadows.

“Holy shit, Jiyu,” you put a hand on your heart, eyes widening at her peeking in from the hallway. “You scared me.”

“I’m so sorry,” she frowns, squinting her eyes to make you out in the dark. It’s easier to see her in her white slip, a thin chiffon material that barely covers her thighs.

You don’t question why she’s out in the hallway in really pretty lingerie, or why she’s on the boy’s side of the house. So much for being discreet. Then again, there must be an ulterior motive for her if she’s already here, five feet away from Jungkook’s room. You wouldn’t have been caught if she hadn’t been so sneaky. (Well, not so sneaky. You got to him first.) You smell like sweat, arousal, and Jungkook. The shirt you’re wearing feels far too short and the cum in your panties feels tacky and gooey. You feel like a teenager being caught smoking.

“Why?” Jiyu’s voice suddenly sounds as dark as the early morning, no sign of the sun.

“Why what?” you answer, furrowing your brows at the sudden change in demeanor.

“Why?” she hisses, eyes wide with pain and confusion, “why Jungkook?”

You frown, not liking her attitude. Did she think it was a contest to who would fuck Jungkook first? Did she think she was being slick, sneaking away into a bedroom she has no business being in, even if he was single? You could laugh. So despite your height you steel yourself, looking at Jiyu straight in the eye.

“Because Jungkook’s mine, and I’m marrying him.”

As you pad down the hallway as fast as you can, you send Jungkook a quick text.

[5:44AM] love: pack it up. Plan b go fake a fever we gotta go lol

#jungkook smut #jungkook x reader #btsghostie #kwritersworldnet #btswritingcafe #btsguild #jungkook fic #jungkook fluff #bts fic #bts smut

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angelhummel · 3 years

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why do you think Blaine cheating wasn't that bad? i know Kurt wasn't great and basically ignored him but how is cheating the answer? especially when he visited Kurt soon after and could've had a conversation? (just to clarify I love Blaine and Klaine, i just thought Blaine was totally wrong to cheat)

oof okay i’m going to try and like bullet point things bc if i expanded on every single argument then we’d be here for hours lol

Blaine was already insecure about Kurt leaving him behind, saying Kurt would have new friends, a new life, etc. Already feeling like Kurt was moving on without him

He thought those fears were coming true after Kurt had been in NY for weeks (if not months - weird timeline) and was starting to ignore him

People minimize it and say it was one missed phone call but it wasn’t

People also credit it to Kurt being busy at his job, which was hardly ever the case

We see Blaine looking sad when he’s trying to ask Kurt’s advice on what to wear - we know how much Kurt loves picking out Blaine’s clothes - and Kurt basically ignores the question and keeps talking about his video

Kurt cuts a call with Blaine short basically just to gossip with someone

And the missed phone call is late at night when he’s just hanging around schmoozing, not working

People also make it seem like Blaine was practically already on the way to see Kurt and couldn’t resist cheating like, minutes before he got to the airport lol

He had a scheduled visit in two weeks, which probably felt like an eternity when he’d already gone so long without seeing Kurt

We see Blaine struggle throughout the show with all sorts of problems. Depression, low self esteem, body dysmorphia, abandonment issues, feeling like he always has to be in control. He’s not a bad person for feeling these things. And this is when they all sort of collide and lead to something he will, and obviously does regret

We even hear it straight from his mouth. He felt like Kurt was moving on without him. Long distance is hard. In his eyes, going for one visit after weeks and weeks apart was probably like putting a bandaid over a bullet wound

He thought there was no point in talking because he thought his relationship was as good as over

He jumped to the worst conclusions, like he also has a tendency to do. And he fucked up. And he knew he fucked up

Literally immediately after this fuck up he rushes to NY to talk to Kurt. To come clean about everything and confess what he did and hopefully start to make things right again

I know that comparing a bad thing to a worse thing doesn’t make the bad thing good but. He didn’t cheat bc he was bored, he didn’t cheat bc he needed the ego boost, he didn’t cheat to get revenge. He didn’t make a habit of it. He didn’t manipulate anyone. He didn’t lie about what he did, or go as long as he could without telling Kurt the truth

99% of the characters on this show cheated, usually for the most petty and asinine reasons. Blaine is one of the few that actually makes sense story and characterwise. It goes beyond some stupid “serial cheater”, “constantly juggling two girls” or “break up with your boyfriend, I’m bored” motive that every other cheater seemed to have

And I’m sorry, I really didn’t want to vague anyone in this post. But I saw someone say “if Blaine loved Kurt as much as he did, he should’ve felt comfortable enough to be vocal about his insecurities”. Love is not a cure all for any negative feelings brought on by a person’s mental illness. Blaine’s love for Kurt, and his inability to always eloquently express what’s wrong with him, actually have very little to do with each other. And these insecurities get brought up again in s5 and we see Blaine continuing his struggle in working through them. It’s a hugely significant part of his character arc

And I won’t hear any “it’s not that deep” excuse bc in s6 Blaine outright says he’s seeing a therapist and working on his mental health issues. We can’t pretend like his depression is just a fan theory with no in-show evidence to back it up

And just to clarify for myself, the above bullet points aren’t me trying to shit on Kurt or blame him for all of this. Same with all Klaine fights, I understand some of both sides but don’t think either one is necessarily right or wrong. It’s never all black and white with them. So while I honestly don’t like how Kurt was treating Blaine around this time, I don’t blame him for this, either. I don’t blame either of them

They’re just two teenage boys in over their heads and they take a few trials and errors to finally get things right and that’s okay. They learned from their mistakes and managed to grow closer and stronger from them in the end. And that’s all that matters, and that’s why I love them so much ♡♡

#glee #klaine #blaine anderson #kurt hummel #season 4 #asks #answered #my thoughts #bolded certain things kind of for a tldr #i think those are the most important #Anonymous

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thehopeelias · 3 years

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More tutb art? Big shocker 🤣🤣

@maybemayura read the first half of tutb for her first time recently so I felt like I got to relive some of my favorite parts! One chapter that I ended up going on and on about was chapter 22 when Nathalie tried to leave. I realized just how much I loved this chapter and thought I’d share some of my analysis from it!

Before you keep reading, there’s obviously huge spoilers here so if you haven’t read Throwing Up These Butterflies by @mymayura then go do that first!!

The main thing that gets me is when she couldnt zip up her sweater bc she was getting so much bigger! its such a small detail but mm was able to make me feel so hard with nathalie’s inability to ZIP HER SWEATER. like there she was trying to leave the man she feels she is burdening and ruining his life. she wants to be capaple of at least sparing him her troubles. and she cant even zip her freaking coat because of HER mistake. HER stupid wish that caused all these problems to begin with. but how can she be mad at her stomach? she WISHED for it! she wants it more than anything! thats why the wish happened. its her deepest desire and the very reason she is leaving and the very reason she cant. zip. her freakin. sweater. its this endless loop of emotions that happen in such a meaningless task.

ive reread it quite a few times 🙈 and have focused on each of their sides during the scene. i love the complexity of nathalie’s side the most from that scene because of the overwhelming amount of emotions she is facing from all angles. she’s hating the man she loves on top of ALL of that. but gabriel’s side is incredible too! and reading it from his side, he is so desperate to keep her because he WANTS her. but he is SO afraid of losing her. she is walking out of the door because of HIM and if he pushes or does something wrong, the fear of her and his child dying is on the brig. not the right word but just right there. all he can think about. this scene was so pivotal because it became too much for gabriel. the fear of losing her from his house and losing her from his life just pushed him over the edge. in ch 23, when fu left and Gabriel was sobbing at her side. he was sobbing because this scene pushed him to it. all that emotion, the intensity, SO GOOD

So those are my general thoughts 😆 If you don’t want to read my line by line (nearly) analysis then yall can keep scrolling 🤣

~~~~~~~~

Gabriel running two steps at a time down the stairs. ive already mentioned his desperation to stop her but BRUH!!! and when he gets between her and the door! i can just picture nathalie glaring at him in frustration while he basically spreads his arms across the door keeping her from leaving.

Then him trying to stop her for “her own safety” as he claims, pisses her off because she thinks he’s lying! and not just lying but lying about having an ounce of care for her! she’s convinced she’s a burden and that he would be better off without her. to hear him lie about caring for her well-being just seems like he is mocking her. a glance at what she wants but thinks can never achieve.

when she calls him cruel. i know she means it but man that hurts. even now she still loves him and still wants his love but she thinks he’s humiliating her and trapping her and just being awful. seeing someone you love in a “cruel” way like this, hurts.

“She got your personal number?” “Yes, somehow. I wonder who could have given it to her.”

sarcastic witty nathalie still shines strong in such an emotional scene like this and i love it.

‘Nathalie, it’s not what you think.” She laughs bitterly. “Of course it’s not. Look, sir, I couldn’t care less about the implied infidelity as we’re not together”

THE SIR WAS ITALICIZED (i think... i read it that way at least) and if i remember right in ch 20, gabriel made it a point for her to call him ‘Gabriel’ as he is the father of her child now. but she SPECIFICALLY calls him sir here. she’s just like ‘lets cut the facade, the fantasy, the bs dream, and remember how this relationship works. ur my boss and thats all this is ever going to be” which im sure stung gabriel a lot seeing how he doesnt want her to think of him as ‘sir’

THE DATES!!! ok it was like a super dumb idea by gabriel but “good intentions with horrible actions” is kind of his thing 🤣 its so sweet tho thinking he was doing that to try and protect her! i also liked in another chapter he admitted to himself he felt bad for leading some of the women on. he was really using them but he still had that empathy and i thought that was actually sweet. Gabriel might be an idiot but he can still be sweet 🤣 back to the point, can u IMAGINE nathalie’s reaction to seeing those pictures? gabriel JUST found out she’s pregnant with his kid and she feels horrible about it. he’s never moved on from emilie and she never thinks he will. she loves his devotion to emilie afterall. so seeing the pictures, not only was it hard to see him with other women but also hard to accept that he CAN move on and HAS moved on. not only has he not moved on with her but he didnt even take his unborn child into consideration. Not to mention, Victoire telling Nathalie to leave and spare gabriel of her burdens just confirmed everything she had been dreading, crying, and fearing for 5 months.

oo oo i loved how gabriel said “You’ve had to deal with her before.” something i love about gabenath is that they have so much chemistry. YEARS and YEARS of chemistry. and u can see that here. Gabriel points it out cuz nathalie really has been apart of his life long enough to know victoire’s a snake.

Super small but: ‘Nathalie winces. “She paid a visit to the house.”’

I can visualize that wince SO much. the pieces are coming together and she’s starting to feel awful about assuming the worst.

‘“Exactly. Adrien and I have been trying for weeks to get her off our backs. We thought — I thought that...’

I love that he was about to have adrien share the blame but was like NOPE! this is all on me. im dumb and my son is wise. 🤣

she asks if the dates weren’t real. again with the dates. pretty much the biggest issue here. the unspoken conversation happening between them, we the audience can hear so loudly. yes she asked that, and she’d never assume he would be loyal to her in that way but we KNOW she wants that. we know that she doesnt truly want him with another woman. Gabriel denying it but also wanting to yell OF COURSE NOT BC IM IN LOVE WITH YOU! its just such a cool thing.

They FINALLY break the tension and “somewhat” resolve the tension. i feel like gabriel had ONE sigh of relief and then Nathalie’s coughing got out of hand and the tensity instantly explodes again. he was already blaming himself for causing her to be upset and now she might die because of it. like AGH SO GOOD!

And that’s the end of my analysis for the section in ch 22 😂

#miraculous ladybug #nathalie sancoeur #gabenath #gabriel agreste #miraculous fanart #tutb #throwing up these butterflies

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justsomefluff · 4 years

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Hi! I was wondering if you could write a reaction to ATEEZ’s s/o being super warm when she’s asleep? My body is super warm when I sleep I’m literally a human heater, thank you!

Okay #1 sorry for getting to this so late I need to be better lmao. and #2 this is adorable lets do it

Hongjoong:

Okay so you fall asleep waiting for Joongie to get home from practice

and it’s like über late so he figures that you would be asleep anyway

still low-key kinda bummed that you are sleeping

just misses you, ya know?

anyway, once he’s all showered and done with his nightly routine

gets in bed, trying his best to move slowly so he won't wake you up

you kinda shift a little as he settles in, but you don't wake up

he scoots towards you, cause the room is kinda cold

he can literally feel how warm you are before he even touches you

doesn't even care if you wake up anymore

homeboy wants to snuggle

wraps his arms around you from behind

spoon vibes

you don't wake up because you're in a pretty deep sleep by now

just nuzzles his nose in between your shoulder blades

forces his fingers between yours

when he feels you unconsciously squeeze his hand he could cry honestly

you’re his warm babie

he falls asleep almost immediately after that because he’s so cozy and at peace

Seonghwa:

Seonghwa is making dinner for everyone at the dorms like the mom that he is

everyone is in their rooms, but you decided to keep him company by sitting on the sofa in the living room and just shouting back and forth with him while he cooks

eventually you stop responding to him and he’s like ????

stomps into the room demanding to know why you won't explain why you think that Toothless is actually cuter than he is

“I LITERALLY AM TOOTHLESS WYM”

shuts up as soon as he sees you and goes soft

cooing at you as he brushes your hair away from your sleeping face

overwhelmed by the urge to hug you

he loves you a lot and he just cant help it okay?

squishes himself on top of you for a second before deciding that you are too warm for him to willingly move from his position

good thing he turned the burner off on the stove because it’s officially nap time now

snuggles himself between you and the couch

if you wake up, he just kind of shushes you and tells you super softly to go back to sleep

Yunho:

it’s movie night with Yunho!!

best night of the week, no lie

you guys are bickering good-naturedly over the snacks and which movie you’ll end up watching

once you actually settle in to watch something, it’s really late

not even 20 minutes in, you’re eyelids are drooping

Knowing you’re gonna fall asleep, you squeeze your arms around Yunho and get ready to pass out

but he’s squirmy because he’s like “it’s too hottttt, you’re too hottt”

“I know”

“NOT LIKE THAT I MEAN YOU GET HOT WHEN YOU SLEEP”

I feel like Yunho is also a very warm boy when he sleeps so if you aren’t actually in bed, he’s gonna be like “no sleeping on me, imma get sweaty”

but if he’s in bed, he doesn't care you’re gonna snuggle even if he melts

he’ll always give in to you though because he loves you awww

just wraps you up and squishes you to his chest and ends up sleeping too

Yeosang:

his hair im cry

I feel like Yeosang runs kinda cold and he hates it

always seeking out your warmth

if he catches you napping, anywhere and for any reason, he’s joining

it doesn’t matter if he’s tired or not, you better make room because this is a nap date now

makes you hold him a lot

he likes to face you when you snuggle, even if you’re both gonna be sleeping he likes that you’re the first thing he sees when he wakes up uwu

likes to put his cold hands on the back of your neck or your lower back just to tease you

“YEOSANG THATS COLD”

“and you’re warm”

so, by the time you’re both asleep again, he’s warm and you're covered in goosebumps

he’s a heat thief

San:

I feel like San is so unwilling to get up in general, that when he realizes that you’re so warm when you sleep, it just makes it worse lmao

will complain during the day like “I can’t spend the night with you anymore because I’m gonna be late in the morning”

but then can't stop himself from climbing into bed with you at night

whiny baby in the morning

just snuggles closer and closer until you’re pretty much the same person

if you tell him to get up he’ll just mumble stuff

“no...warm...dont wanna”

big baby talking boy

literally hold you so tight and blames you for his own inability to leave the bed lmao

“you’re so mean” “why” “making me wanna stay bc you’re so warm”

let’s face it, he’d wanna stay anyway

he pushes it so close though, always running around in the morning to get ready so that he isn't actually late lmao

Mingi:

you’re waiting him to finish up practicing the new choreography so you guys can go to lunch

just chillin on the couch and watching your boyfriend work his butt off

eventually the dim lights and the steady bass of the song lulls you to sleep and your head falls forward onto your chest

once Mingi is done with practice he looks over at you and sees the uncomfortable position you’re in

walks over to you and lays you down gently on the couch

crawls on top of you and you wake up

“mingi get off you’re so sweaty ew”

“but you’re warm”

makes up some really weird excuse like “my sweat is cold and you're warm so boom equilibrium”

but you’re still half asleep so you can’t even point out the oddness of his argument

also we all know Mingi loves sleep

“what about lunch?”

and he’ll just hush you and be like “later”

then you end up sleeping until dinner time lmao

Wooyoung:

Wooyoungie is a snuggle bug okay

So if he catches you sleeping...soft mode: activated

but he’s also a big ole tease

so he’d wake you up...rude

you’d be like “why’d you wake me up”

“snuggles”

and I mean you can’t really be mad at that can you

he likes to leave kisses all over you

and he’ll end up with his face tucked into your neck and falls asleep with his lips pressed against you SO CUTE

and you’re like Wooyoungie why’d you stop

but he’s snoring already and I feel like he whimpers in his sleep and will cuddle closer omg

am I soft for Wooyoung aghhhhhh

Jongho:

STRONG BABY LOVES TO HOLD YOU OKAY

but when you get all warm at night

he moves so that you're holding him

whether he means to do it or not, he is gonna be your babie

you’ll wake up and he's wrapped around your torso, head buried in your tummy

then when he wakes up, he’ll kiss your bellybutton uwu

but then he’ll go back to sleep because you're warm and comfy

and his arms are so tight around you

when you try to get out of bed his grip just tightens

just a little sweetheart honestly

#ateez #ateez fanfic #ateez imagines #ateez reactions #ateez scenarios #fluff #ateez fluff #ateez hongjoong #ateez seonghwa #ateez yunho #ateez yeosang #ateez san #ateez mingi #ateez wooyoung #ateez jongho

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lingeringscars · 3 years

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bellamy’s mindset through the show can basically be broken up into 3 parts: we save who we can save (s1-4, 6), the ends justify the means (5), and sacrificing the few to save the many (7). there are caveats to all of this: in s1-4, bellamy will put the life of octavia over everyone else. in season 5, spacekru is where his loyalties lie and who he is willing to protect above all else, but only after his relationship with both octavia and clarke is severed. in season 7 this just isn’t true anymore. he’s trying to save everyone, not just his people, and he isn’t willing to run into situations that would get himself killed to save them anymore. it was the start of him learning how to balance himself and what he wants/believes in ( for once ) with the interests of the people he loves. for the first time ever, the few include his family. prior to that, he was willing to do anything for them, willing to die and kill, and it was just what could have been a conclusion to his arc because finally finally finding self love and not putting everything he is in others. that’s all i’m gonna say about s7 bc .. yeah.

in early seasons, he also focuses more on protecting his people as a way to justify his choices. i once read a post talking about how bellamy says protect and clarke says save, and I think that does a good job at hinting where his mindset is. bellamy takes preemptive action as a way to try and protect his people. he can’t see 89 steps ahead of him, he only sees what is directly in front of him. this inability to look ahead and focus on saving who is in front of him has indirectly caused the deaths of multiple people -- and because it’s bellamy he of course blames himself for them too but it’s not something he thinks of until confronted with it.

season 1

i don’t really have a lot of examples for s1 because it’s really .. a lot of protecting octavia & himself

hanging murphy is one though. when they discover murphy’s knife, i do believe bellamy put the pieces together before everyone else. i’ve talked a bit before about that and how based off what’s been shown, i think he was going to talk to murphy when they were alone instead of outright. this is also one of my examples when i think about how bellamy & abby have a similar leadership style. he’s more willing to keep that a secret because he understands how people will response - and he ends up being right. instead of blaming himself for this though, he transfers the blame onto clarke because he didn’t want people to know for this exact reason. he at that point had also put trust and faith in murphy and would have wanted to protect him from that, but by the time he hangs him, he has to choose between murphy and the rest of the delinquents. the delinquents are more important to keeping octavia safe if they’re on his side, and he has to go through with it. flash forward, and his relationship with murphy becomes increasingly contentious because murphy then leads the manhunt against charlotte. charlotte, to him, is just an innocent kid and he can’t handle murphy being willing to go after a child ( basically insert misplaced big brother feelings ). he feels the intense need to protect charlotte, even when it comes out that she’s guilty, and that goes first.

destroying the radio. this was a big protect himself ( and therefore protect o because he still believes he’s the only one that can ) moment. if raven could contact the ark and let them know that they’re all alive, then he’s as good as dead. he doesn’t know about the culling of the ark, at least not that it’s happening now. even still, clarke saying that it’s his people ( factory station ) that will die... isn’t on his mind. he knows that’s true, knows that it’ll be his people and not the elite. the beginning of s1 is rooted in his focus on the power dynamics on the ark in this way and it’s how he connects with the delinquents. by destroying the radio, he effectively signs the death warrants of 300 people. while he does try to stop this by showing them where he threw the radio and working on setting flares off, it’s another way that bellamy indirectly kills people because of his desire to protect (himself and) octavia.

focus on the number dead vs alive. this is just a big bellamy thing especially earlier on. bellamy focuses on the number dead when they’re leaving camp, and clarke has to correct him to the number that are still alive. the delinquents at this point are his people, and he has felt every death ( she only came because of me ). his focus is on the people he couldn’t save, and that continues going into season 2

season 2

mel. when faced with mel, bellamy says that they don’t know how if their people are still alive, but they can save this one girl. this really begins his we save who we can save today mindset, and he focuses on the fact that they can help her when the odds are insurmountable.

infiltrating mount weather + protecting echo. the 100 are his people; it doesn’t matter what the risks are because he’s doing what he can to bring them back and get them out. while in mount weather, other people become his people, such as maya. it’s also another moment where bellamy has to kill someone in order to escape the cages ( a direct threat to himself and others there ). bellamy has no reason to trust or protect echo at this point because he’s just come out of the war with the grounders and still prejudiced against them, and yet when they come at her, he makes noise so they take him ( the strong ) instead. he does what he has to to ensure that she’s protected for the time being, and then she helps him in return. killing the mount weather guard didn’t completely hit him until he saw the son of the person he killed, having to confront that there are children in mount weather and that the person he killed had people that needed him.

pulling the lever. bellamy focuses on the people that have helped him and the children in mount weather as people that need to be saved too. they helped him so there has to be another way. it’s hearing raven being tortured and seeing that octavia will be too that makes him change his mind and help clarke because he sees that they don’t have time. as much as the other’s have helped him, they aren’t his people. octavia is his responsibility and he needs to make sure he protects her first.

season 3

the massacre. i’m only going to focus on this here because it’s really the main thing but also brings him back into the we save who we can save. he asked gina to stay back to protect her, thinking she’d be safer there. he spent early s3 focused on finding and bringing clarke back as well. bellamy is also still recovering from having to kill people in mount weather because of lexa’s betrayal, and because of his prejudices, he lumps all grounders into one and is unable to see that azgeda blew up mount weather, not trikru. when lexa sends trikru warriors to protect them, he doesn’t believe the intentions because the last time they were there to help them, they made a deal with the enemy and turned their backs. they’re always going to put their people first. so is bellamy. the entire time he backs pike, it’s focusing on protecting their people. he doesn’t go into the massacre thinking that he wants to kill people, tries to get pike to spare the women and children and does convince him to spare indra ( i honestly don’t remember what the reasoning was but i think it has to do with her importance to octavia and at this point lincoln too ). he thinks that he’s protecting his people before they can get killed. this is a shift from the past two seasons too, which obviously influence this because he didn’t strike first in season 1 or against the mountain men in s2 and it led to the deaths of some of the delinquents and torture of raven. act first and he doesn’t have to live in fear of them attacking first, and thus convincing himself that he’s protecting everyone.

season 4

blowing up the hydrogenator. this is one of the best examples of bellamy being unable to think ahead. outside of his intense faith in raven, he thinks they have six months to figure something else out. he sees the suffering in those people now. he can’t do anything about praimfaya, but he can save the people here. they’re being forced to work, they’re going to be moved, and a little girl tells him all of this. he sees the suffering and has to act ( how many people do you have to save before you forgive yourself ). these people had one day, but by saving them, the skaikru survival number has gone from 500 to 100. raven and clarke are able to see that he just sentenced all of these people to death, but bellamy sees that he gave them another day to live.

opening the bunker. octavia above everyone else. clarke is telling him what the consequences of opening the bunker would be, but he can’t focus on that because octavia is on the other side of the bunker. it’s not just octavia though because kane is out there too. by opening the bunker, bellamy is again sentencing 400 people to death, and he again doesn’t view it this way. he sees that octavia and kane will die if he doesn’t. by doing this he also inadvertently saved 600 more people, which matters after the time jump.

protecting echo. this !! is the moment that sparked this entire thing. it’s so subtle but when emori’s suit breaks, bellamy steps in front of echo and stops murphy from taking it. it’s another one of those moments where by doing this, he effectively sentenced emori to death. it’s not that he was trying to do this, and while i also use this moment as a way to show that b/echo always had a foundation even if bellamy pretended like they didn’t, it’s also just that he knows echo. anyway, if murphy takes echo’s suit, echo will die. bellamy steps in front with that mindset, not that by not letting murphy do this, emori dies.

season 5

threatening the lives of 300 inmates. not much has changed huh. bellamy threatening 300 people for the life of 1 ( who it’s important to note he originally thought was octavia ). octavia still comes first even after six years in space. upon finding out that clarke is alive, he doesn’t change his strategy because ... well.. she’s alive. he then uses this as leverage to save the rest of his people -- which at this stage, now includes wonkru just not in that train of thought. when it comes to saving the people in the bunker, he wants them all saved. even if o is still the priority at this point.

killing kara. ends justify the means. taking lives to save them. the difference is that now bellamy actually views it this way. it isn’t just about protecting his people, he’s acknowledging that he is killing them. he is sacrificing the few to save the many. the only reason why he isn’t completely in this mindset is because he’s trying to save octavia from herself. it’s the beginning stages of sacrificing his own people though, which was never an option prior to season 5. he was willing to do anything for those he had promised to protect, and kara was originally skaikru. now, she was completely wonkru but bellamy didn’t want to believe that wonkru was completely the enemy and that his sister was still in there somewhere ( this didn’t change until after she burned the farm because he would never be able to forgive her willingness to sacrifice her own people when there was another option. when peace was an option. he is entirely unable to see octavia’s perspective and why she needs to be out of the bunker. he’s had peace the past six years, even if not peace of mind, unlike octavia and so he only sees that there is another way ).

poisoning o + putting the chip in madi. prior to s5, he never would have poisoned o. he always thought that she would wake up and that they would have peace and she would understand. honestly prior to s5, putting the chip in madi probably also wouldn’t have been an option because of her age. this time he actually can see ahead more than he could before space, but he still doesn’t anticipate what does happen. he’s willing to betray clarke because honestly he thinks she’s overreacting. he still doesn’t think octavia will harm madi and he believes this is the only way to save them all. he’s terrified when it looks like madi might not wake up / take to the flame. ( and honestly part of why he can forgive clarke quickly is bc of this - he put her daughter in danger and he once upon a time would have done anything for o. ). putting madi at risk was a necessary risk to him though because it meant that all of their people might survive. he knows that the rest of his family is in danger if this doesn’t work, so it’s also putting spacekru above everyone else, and in the end he does decide them over o and clarke.

season 6

casting octavia out. while in s5 he had decided that his people specifically were spacekru, casting octavia out was because she was a threat to all of them. she had walked them into a war that destroyed earth, and after monty and harper died, he takes doing better to heart. he hasn’t forgiven himself for his actions on earth, many of which were to protect octavia, and his first action on sanctum is deciding that octavia is a threat that needs to be contained. she isn’t someone he knows anymore, and she is a threat to his family and everyone else. it’s not an easy decision, but he is deciding that she needs to go to keep everyone else safe from her. if octavia had died, it would have been another indirect death as a result of his actions, which i think he knows. i also think he blames octavia for monty & harper because if she hadn’t forced them into war, earth never would have been destroyed and they wouldn’t have spent their entire lives trying to find a new home for them. he isn’t going to let octavia threaten what monty and harper left for them.

clarke. i don’t remember a lot of s6 but he does backslide into putting one above all. he does try for peace prior to finding out clarke is alive, but clarke brings up all of these feelings in him about protection in general. he’s already cast out octavia, lost harper and monty, and he’s grieved clarke before. he can’t go through that again, so they come up with a plan. when it goes south, he still looks to echo for confirmation that she can handle it. when she gives him permission, he leaves. he no longer thinks about the people he left behind because all he can see is that clarke will die. if he doesn’t take action, she WILL die. he believes in echo and thinks that she can handle herself and so the people he left behind.. they’re safe in his head but clarke isn’t. he also partially blames himself for this because he should have known clarke would be a target and didn’t do anything. clarke is the person that needs to be saved and the one he knows that they can. when he finds out that that aren’t safe, he works to make sure that they will be.

#long post #long post for ts #do i ever shut up? no.#i've thought about this for Months and just had to get it down #there are so many more examples these are just the ones that stood out #ask to tag #muse: bellamy blake #meta: bellamy blake #in case anyone forgot i am a bellamy blog first and have spent tooooo long analyzing his headspace #i've seen the first 4 eps of this show 4 times and then ep 5- 5x09 twice and then 5x10-7x13 once #a lot can happen in one queue

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noorengels · 4 years

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reasons i am sad (friendship edition)

in year 4 my best friend invited everyone to her birthday party and not me and they all actually kept it a secret really well they almost pulled it off except she held her party in la plaza which basically is the hangout spot for families in that area i spent all my fridays there playing until midnight bc literally everyone from school would go. so i was walking home with my entire family inc grandparents and uncles and we went through la plaza and there they were! every single one of my friends at her party! apparently her mum didnt let her invite me bc apparently i hit her which i didn’t i hit another girl so her excuse is invalid and its the first time ive been so publicly excluded i cried on a bench.

in year 7 we hated this girl bc she was so fake i genuinely believe she is a psychopath like she has all the symptoms except shes in set 5 maths lol so my friend was like what if i spread a rumour about her and i was like lol do it and she did and for some reason i was blamed??? and lost all of my friends and she bullied me so hard but i didnt realise bc i was “friends” with her bc our mums were friends so shed like walk with me to lessons and talk to me while belittleing me and idk she was just a fucking bitch she made me feel so horrible like it was emotional bullying but also like telling everyone who i liked and saying lmao you literally have no friends “count how many friends you have? omg you literally cant even reach ten can you???” like in front of everyone but then shed also be really nice to me at the same time like idk it was like she was my friend but she bullied me it was so horrible saffa i hate you and the original friend who spread the rumour went on to become her best friend for like 6 years so uh hate that

managed to make friends with people not in my class in year 8! which sucked bc saffa had alienated people in my class so now they all just didnt like me i was the weird girl with no friends because of her and it was so horrible bc id always be forced to join the ready made groups between friends by the teacher bc i didnt have a group to work with or id get paired with the weird girl like i was only the weird girl after saffa made everyone hate me this girl was weird bc she just is idk

in year 10 they made a gc without me! i basically created that group tho like i gathered these friends i hade made in different lessons (obviously not in my main class lol) and they literally just??? decided to exclude me for no reason. and then theyd talk about what they talked about in the gc in front of me like “omg remember last night on the gc” isha ur so fucking boring no normal person talks about their gc with the same people again do u have no other conversational points smh

in year 11 it got so bad to the point where once i sat with them and they all just left! like they took their stuff and moved to the table behind me i wanted to cry so bad i did at home i think its the worst one out of all of these because it happened to my face? idk saffa was horrible too but this was just “were leaving” idk like ive never felt as horrible as i did in that moment i cant even describe how im feeling rn reliving it

its okay bc i made friends with my best friend from sciences + history bc our surnames are next to each other so we always sat together! i honestly clung to this girl after that bc i refused to spend a second longer with that other group after 3 years of enduring not even being liked by ur friends so i made friends with her friends which was easy bc yes!

so by the first term of year 12 i had three friends! in fact one of them was like ur not having a birthday party??? im taking u out to eat so my first birthday event thing in literally years was all thanks to arun i am honestly so grateful for him he didnt even go bc he was busy and we planned it the day before my birthday but it was literally me and two friends eating pizza at zizzis and im crying so much rn but year 12 was when i found people who genuinely cared about me

we established a group of like 8 lol and were planning a holiday for the end of year 13! very skam of us! we had a gc and everything! we were gonna go to spain bc im spanish so i could speak!

this trip was unspoken of in year 13 and i was like lol kinda weird um okay but nope nothing weird about it they just created a chat without me and were still going to spain!!! one of them even sent me screenshots of their airbnb to translate its like u want me to know lol

i did complain to one of them but thats it i was just hurt on my own and coronavirus happened so it got cancelled anyways so i won really

in yr 13 i also got closer to this boy called adam! i remember my friend was like you two would get on so well idk why ur not friends and i was like idk its adam lol do i really want to and yes i did bc he is in fact the isak to my sana! but anyways i hate him but i love him we have that kinda friendship where were alwAYS trying to beat the other one up and honestly the most heart felt goodbye when schools shut was between us both bc at first we were fighting and then he just stopped and his eyes softened and i was like whats wrong with you why arent u punching me and he went come here and we hugged and its like wow despite being a dick ill miss you

anyways so uhhh quarantine we skyped often it was fun and then restrictions were lifted i went to spain and the second i land they all stop talking in the gc????? like im abroad not dead why are u creating a new one??? this gc was agressively spammed so i know for a fact theres another im not stupid

i come back from spain and theyre like can we meet!!! we meet three weeks later and theyr like i missed u so much im so happy uou came i love you and it felt really genuine like they genuinely missed me

two days later i find out through snapchat theyve all gone on holiday together!!!!!!!!!!!!! all of them and just ofc didnt invite me they went to the beach for two days and kept posting about it and im so bitter about it like bro???????? why so secretive????? like i cried so much when i saw bc they still just idk why does every single friendgroup ive ever been in exclude me like i must be the problem theres no other explanation for it i am not the kind of person people want to have around i am so funny but im a bitch and will come for ur ass because i have the inability to lie i have no filter either which i know makes them dislike me i know it does but thats the price you oay for being my friend i just say things as it is becauxe i hate secrets bc secrets are always about excluding me so i rather be honest and upfront but that clearly puts people off bc im too upfront and im not getting a personality transplant im not tryna be boring but im so sick of always being the one on her own

adam was relevant uh hews my only friend rn he checked up on me the other day so cheers adam for making sure im not completely isolated

the funny thing is that all my friends hate adam bc “hes a dick” hes not he just says things how it is were so similar so if they hate adam they hate me and im over being hated lol bye!

i start uni next week and i clearly have no social skills so im not gonna make friends im so scared of being lonely i hate being left out

this went from sad to full on angry like i was crying at some point and now im fuming like im so hot rn my blood pressure isnt doing okay

#my manifesto #sua: extreme #venting #xoxo #no ones had more friendship drama than me i refuse to believe it #this is 1526 words long #shut up ali

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aeirithgainsborough · 5 years

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very Important adam/ronan things to take away from the cdth sampler:

“like the other lynch brothers, he was a regular churchgoer, but most people assumed he played for the other team.” i am SCREAMING. top tier gay joke. well timed.

everyone: ronan’s eyes aren’t pretty. adam: mhmm e y e l a s h e s

much to say about the revelation that ronan is partly at the barns to keep his dreams hidden and in check, and how much he relates an inability to change and be like everyone else to having to stay there. almost like he’s stuck huh! i’ve been saying!!

of note that words used to describe ronan’s existence are BORED and MALINGERED.

fingers crossed he finds some balance between his dreams and his wants/needs that allows him to leave the barns and grow but after the Great Crab Disaster I’M WORRIED.

fire imagery EVERYWHERE. i’m WORRIED again.

“there are stains that spread faster than you drive. if you drive, it’ll take fourteen years to get there. seventeen. forty. one hundred. we’ll be driving to your funeral by the end.” good to know ronan is still the most DRAMATIC boy in the whole of virginia. absolutely no chill.

dont like the possible foreshadowing of that driving to your funeral by the end, though. must leave lynches alone!

“it’s very safe” asjkajjka DECLAN PLEASE

“ronan kicked one of the volvo’s tires” asjkajjka RONAN PLEASE.

ronan trying to act nonchalant by cramming chocolate covered peanuts into his mouth and choking a little is Peak Disaster Gay.

matthew’s music must be awful if ronan and declan are in agreement over it, must have playlist.

ronan who lives to pretend he doesn’t care wondering if his brothers didn’t say anything about his moving because it didn’t make a difference to them is huhhh. don’t like it, take it away pls.

i’m sorry, ENTIRELY WRAPPED UP IN! ENTIRELY!

entirely

wrapped

shut up!!!! shut upppppp!

“is there any version of you that could come with me to cambridge?” tbh nothing would have readied me for this. adam i-can-do-everything-alone asking ronan if he could go with him. so much growth, too much pride, nowhere to put it, send help.

the fact that ronan doesn’t stay in cambridge when he visits adam because of plausible deniability, that if he doesn’t try there’s no evidence he can’t make it there. rip.

ronan! missed! him! like! a! lung!

dramatic again, but entirely relatable bc damn, same ronan, same.

a) ronan thinking about how his heartbeat is the same as everyone else’s so he wasn’t that different and b) JUST LIKE ADAM’S HEART WHEN HIS HEAD WAS RESTING ON HIS HEAD = much too much to think about. need to lie down for a bit.

he could move to follow the guy he loved!! we all knew it was love, we’ve always known it was love, but! the words. the words!!!!! brb sobbing.

i have only had jordan for a day and a half but if anything happened to her i would kill everyone in this room and then myself. 11/10 would marry.

art forgery plot confirmed!

THIS WAS HOW IT HAD BEGUN

bitch fkajdkajksja GIVE ME A WARNING.

still can’t compose myself RE the info that ronan saw adam and immediately sent a desperate prayer up to god

will the word please ever be the same again? definitely not!

adam’s arms adam’s hands his lovely! boyish! hands!

the description of his expressions with all its contradictions and multitudes is just my favourite thing ever. it encapsulates everything i love about adam fucking parrish.

and the fact that ronan instantly recognised all those multitudes in him. there was always a level of understanding ronan had for adam throughout trc that no one else did and this tells us he had that before he even met him, he just... recognised something in him i just... ;______;

please

ronan knowing all the harvard stats because he was the person adam could crow to, how he takes on that adam that is still full of contradictions and multitudes, how he finds it hard but he absorbs all the facts and all of adam’s anxieties, even in the face of his own anxieties about adam leaving and falling in love with the shining, educated people that ronan thinks are better than him. that absolute, unwavering support 😭😭😭

tbh there’s a whole ass lot to unpack in this section so imma try and do it briefly (she says!)

ronan lynch is a romantic cdth confirmed:

he could have texted adam but he liked the soft surprise of it

over the past few days ronan had played his reunion with adam over in his head MANY TIMES

adam i love you but that outfit sounds awful. you are a student, it’s a friday night, put some sweats on and stuff some cheetos in your mouth.

the sweet nervousness of their reunion, how they walk past each other and both seem so uncertain. they’re a year into dating and the still get nervous and unsure after a few weeks apart and it’s CUTE and definitely speaks to their excitement/anticipation levels.

THE WATCH. big time softness.

they hugged hard ;_____;

im just so relieved that they’re allowed to touch each other and be intimate and aren’t consigned to the ‘boys in love aren’t like that boring boring’ corner.

the way ronan thinks about how adam fits as he remembered. huh. you’re really gonna do this to me.

his hand still pressed against the back of ronan’s skull the way it ALWAYS did when they hugged.

you smell like home. you smell like home!!!!!! brb ive gone absolutely fucking feral.

i both want to play repo because it sounds fun and don’t want to because it sounds complicated and i fucking hate instructions. much confusion.

adam pressing his shoe hard against ronan’s and then his leg and then breathing in ronan’s ear I AM HOWLING. ronan’s nerve endings being made a marvel of I AM SOBBING. it’s very important that m/m ships are afforded the same level of explicit attraction as m/f (and i don’t mean explicit as in nsfw, i mean as in obvious)

no offence because i love them but all of adam’s friends sound Extra™

“to the outside eye, ronan lynch was a loser” pls ronan, you are giving me an ulcer.

scary spice i asjkjdkjskdjak

queer crying club! i stan!!

also adam saying in the epilogue of trk that he wanted to save all the adam’s hidden in plain view and then going to college and scooping up all the criers and giving them something to do is far too much to handle.

don’t think about that and the time he thought about how he used to spend his nights crying on the trailer steps and wondering why he bothered until gansey came along and offered him friendship. dont think about how he’s essentially paying that forward DON’T THINK ABOUT IT.

hand holding, arms around each other, hip to hip walking, can’t wait anymore kissing, I MISSED YOU. love that for me!

but also the fact that adam reaches down for ronan’s hand and its so natural. ronan’s hand is there so he just. takes it.

hearing ronan’s thoughts on what happened with robert at last is A Lot. the way it’s still happening, always happening, kept fresh and savage shows how affected ronan was by it all and still is and i think its so important that he’s not just. angry and hot headed. there’s more to it than that. its painful, it makes him feel sick, its unending and it really speaks to how much adam means to him.

adam thinks he has no one BITCH YOU’VE GOT ALL OF US.

and ronan.

but. how he feels like he has nothing still. the way his voice hitches on ‘because’ because it’s all still so painful. i wanna wrap him up. i wanna take everything that hurts away. i wanna tell him he’s so loved. guess i’ll just have to sit back and watch him work his way through it all I GUESS. no but i am looking forward to his growth in this trilogy, especially considering how much he’s grown already. adam parrish invented character growth lets 👏 be 👏 real 👏

it had never been a fight between them/it was a fight between adam and himself, between adam and the world/for ronan it was a fight between truth and compromise, between the black and white he saw and the reality everyone else experienced. i LOVE this. it so well encapsulates them. and it’s so important that they can realise their differing world views and their complexities and meet in the middle somewhere.

“ronan put his lips on adam’s deaf ear, and he hated adam’s father” FUCK ME UP. my absolute favourite bit 103930%. absolute incoherent mess over here. not! okay! see other post for more coherency because i only had it for 5.7 minutes.

frowning, guarded, crumpled adam who i’ll literally. never be over in all of my life. 38983/10 will love him until the end of time.

i want it too much. !!!!!! going feral again over here. WHAT DO YOU WANT ADAM? I WANT IT TOO MUCH. definitely will never shut up about this.

scared adam is going to be a visionary so pretending chapter 6 doesn’t exist.

LINDENMERE ;________;

i love it already

i CANNOT believe that ronan is being dream invaded and challenged and he’s over here like hmm nice bike ELEGANT and ROUGH and READY like ADAM asjkasj please ronan you are so embarrassing!!

also. ronan thinks adam is elegant and rough and ready so! there’s that!

i literally. cannot. cope with the HILARITY of chapter 8. the whole thing is a complete and utter DISASTER. it’s absolutely gone off in adam’s room after all his work at constructing a well put together boy. ronan comes for a night and everything goes BONKERS. amazing.

(really worried about what this means RE ronan being able to exit the barns and grow and change and not be bored and not feel like a loser so we’re focusing on the hilarious disaster of it all.)

p.s. adam sleeping slotted between ronan and the wall OKAY. THIS IS FINE!

p.p.s. adam’s bed hair is WILD.

p.p.p.s i have missed adam and ronan so so so so so much and im an emotional fucking wreck

#call down the hawk #ronan lynch #adam parrish #pynch #dreamer trilogy #cdth spoilers #long post #sorry so much to say we were so well fed so many thoughts #;_____;#lou.txt

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prorevenge · 6 years

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Psycho Ex gets my egoless revenge with a side of heavy-duty karma.

The following story occurred over the course of 13-8 years ago, and I apologize preemptively for the length, because it is a bit involved.

I was in a relationship for 9 years with a girl I met in college. We broke up on the cusp of my 29th birthday. While breakups and divorce are never trauma-free, this one was as close to that as I believe is humanly possible to get, there were no fights and minimal drama, and I moved to a new city to get a fresh start and be nearer my dad/stepmom/half sisters, as I'm close to them and it was nice to have family during this. Get an apartment, start over, everything's good. Then I meet "her."

Things with her seemed good at first. She was the polar opposite of my ex. She's quiet yet nice, had her life relatively together (my first wife was very unfocused and horrible with money), physically a complete contrast, wild in the bedroom--I thought I had hit the jackpot.

Anyhoo, I fall for her hard. We have a whirlwind romance, move in shortly, and we have this glamorous life where we make good money (she was a corporate accountant, I had a decent small business, we're pulling in 150K+ combined), renting a luxury apartment, one car paid and the other brand new, no kids. Things are great, except that we drink too much together and some other underlying issues I'm blind to at the time. We get soused one night and drive to Vegas, and get married on the strip after 6 months of dating and 9 of knowing each other. The ink is barely dry on my divorce papers from version 1.0, but no matter, I'm in love. My family likes her overall. Her family loves me. We adopt cats. We talk about trying to have a kid.

We upgrade our life and take on more debt, just as the housing bubble bursts and the economy tanks, she loses a couple jobs due to her inability to show up on Mondays, and I start losing clients as the ones I have start cutting their advertising budget (my field). Things start to get pinched, and she first starts complaining, then gets petulant, because now we can't spend the way we used to, the quarterly mini-vacations dry up, plus we're cooking at home instead of going out to eat 4x a week. We basically stop having sex a little more than a year into the relationship (didn't realize it then, because I was dumb and love-blind, but she cheated on me during this period).seRealizing what we're up against with our normal bills plus our credit cards, I go out and get a job bartending at a posh resort, the only other real skill I have at the time that's marketable. I get two other part time gigs to help make ends meet. She still complains, and throws me an ultimatum before I even start getting paychecks, laying the blame at my feet. I say fine, screw this then. Had we stuck it out even a few more months, things would have started to turn a financial corner. Instead, she goes full two-faced, mean-spirited bitch on me. The night we first fight, she "attempts suicide" by scratching her wrist with a leatherman, then calls 911, gets admitted to the hospital (I arrive home to cops telling me this), and has the security guard toss me when I show up to see if she's okay because she doesn't want to talk to me. I use the quotes because there was a small collection of firearms nearby I bought for her target shooting hobby which were untouched, so it was obviously just a ploy for attention.

We basically fight for the next week, I give her everything she wants, which includes leaving the house, signing over my new truck to her, and only taking stuff I brought into the relationship, basically enough to fill a small storage space. She's financially pinched so I sell my office furniture for cash and don't even touch the bank account, just take my biz money and one CC I got separate from her. I go to the Bay Area for a few months, financially struggle, don't get the job I was sure was on lock. During this time, I have this revelation one evening--I drink too much and that it's caused a load of problems in my life, so I quit, and I haven't touched a drop since.

Broke and realizing nothing I try is working, I come back to town, live with my dad for a month, find a roommate, then a shit retail job (my business has dropped from 7-8K per month at its height to now around 500/mo), I bike everywhere bc I can't afford a car, and my credit is toast partially due to her love of spending on plastic, so I'm facing bankruptcy. I'm 31, and this is really humbling, but whatever, I'm alive, have dealt with hardship before, this won't last forever. She has kept her house, declared personal BK on her debts, keeps her car, and has been dating a series of men starting a couple weeks after we split. While I never asked the details, apparently she's also reached out to a few of my friends and badmouthed me a bit. This would be mildly annoying, but add in two factors--she's dragging her feet on the divorce due to not having money to file, keeps up contact on the pretense of us needing to talk, but plays emotionally manipulative head games during the whole sequence ("I've realized I still love you, that's why you can make me cry so easily," and other bullshit Hallmark movie lines like this). Also, we live in a suburb that's smaller and tightly knit, so multiple places I go to like my church, the bookstore I frequent, and the coffee shop right by my place, she talks endless shit to people. Says I was a cheater and physically/emotionally abusive (complete crap, but whatever), I'm stalking her, I supposedly stole tens of thousands of dollars from her, the whole nine. Some people actually believe her, I even get threatened by a wannabe biker one night that's literally twice my age with violence, itself a funny story but not the point.

Finally, after some more bullshit and back and forth, she leaves town (more falsehoods around this, including her borrowing a bit of money she didn't end up paying back, and sticking me with a massive overage on our cell bill right before we split the account). My dumb, trusting heart hurts but I'm mostly relieved to see the last of her, realizing she's only nice to me when she wants something. She goes to NY to shack up with another guy, gets pregnant 15 minutes later. Finally sends me divorce paperwork. I sign it and send back quickly, all notarized docs, everything organized and flagged. She attempts to be "friends" and I want no part of this BS. I'm businesslike, she gets upset. She screws up filing, blames me. I say "whatever," straighten out the court issues. One week after the divorce is finalized, the kid is born. No word from her after that for two years, thank god. I get a new career, start advancing in it, and start dating a new woman that I'm still with 10 years later. Weirdly enough, they knew each other, and she didn't like her, partially because one of my ex's infidelity partners was her ex-husband, during a time they were exploring patching things up for the kids' sake (though there were multiple reasons for her distrust, apparently she always gave my wife an icky intuitive feeling).

So flash forward two years. I get a call from my current squeeze. She's just talked to a friend who was also a very brief roomie of "her" after our split. She's breaking up with the baby daddy. There's a custody fight. He's saying he doesn't know if it's his. Will I help her? Well, it's the right thing to do, so even though I don't trust or particularly like her, I say yes. I get the call, and a sob story. Most of it doesn't add up--he took the kid, but thinks it's actually mine, to prove paternity I'd need to come to NY and take a paternity test at one of their facilities, also he hit her, put a GPS tracker on her car, brother is a Russian mobster who threatened her, all very far-fetched. Needless to say, even without this fanciful tale, I generally assume if this woman is talking, it's a lie, so I'm suspicious. Her lawyer calls me, and seems like a clueless shmuck. I get a letter from him, very unprofessional and not even on a letterhead (every other legal doc I've seen has "from the law offices of blah blah" on it, but this is literally just off a laser printer), and says, verbatim "I, M___ K___, am the ex-husband of J___ K___, and was married to her from 6/07-8/09. I have no legal interest in the child." Super shady.

Not wanting to end up in a situation where I've allowed myself to be legally fucked over, I make my own lawyer consultation appointment. Before I can even go, the baby daddy finds me on Facebook and sends me a message. Between calls with him, his lawyer, and the impartial lawyer NY state appoints for the child's welfare, I get a very different story. He knows it's his, he had a paternity test done on the sly at birth because she had been promiscuous before they got together, and she was pregnant so quickly he was concerned. They broke up because she was drinking too much, he busted her with a bottle of vodka as she was driving with the kid in the car. She stood up in court, claimed I was actually the father, and she had no idea where to find me (he found me in 10 seconds online, I'm a tech guy with massive social media presence, a tech blog, multiple writing credits on publications, my frigging name as a domain, plus I've had the same cell phone number for 14 years). Also the other BS was just that, he's an IT guy for a university and his brother works for a carpet cleaning chain, plus just like in our relationship, he never hit or stalked her, etc.

So she, not knowing what I know, starts sending me text messages. I say "Filled out and on its way back to your lawyer," and toss it in the trash. I'm so tempted to send her some poetic message about how the truth is coming back to haunt her, but I resist, because I'm not doing this for her, but rather for the sake of their son and his father, so let's keep my ego out of it. I provide legal statements to all in the court. Tell them I know it's not possibly mine because I hadn't been with her since April 15 of '08, kid's birthday is in Sept of '09 (I remember the date because, due to taxes, I got fucked twice that day). Explain when she was in NY, which is the likely dates of conception, prove I was thousands of miles away on the west coast. Tell them to look through her social media, where she meticulously tagged herself and took tons of pictures of even their mundane locations. Provide a blood sample to a local lab. Tell them salacious details about her drinking and occasional drug use, including her abused prescriptions and a previous hospitalization where she was held for psych eval due to taking way too many pills.

Court comes, and she gets blindsided. Stack of depositions and a collection of statements from me were what sealed the deal, apparently, and the incredibly stupid game she was running is fully exposed. Gets no custody, no support, supervised visitation once a week. I run into her ex-roomie, upset, but instead of giving her attitude, I just calmly tell her the scam J__ was running, then let her "pull out of me" the truth about our split. She's flabbergasted, but also a horrible gossip, so it gets around town like wildfire. People I barely know, including the aforementioned biker, all come up to me and apologize for misjudging me. I'm years past the stage of having any morbid curiosity to check her social media, but every few months she pops up as a "suggested friend," and I notice bemusedly the number of mutual friends plummets from triple digits to eventually 3. Baby's father sends me a massive Amex gift card for Christmas, as much as I make in a week at the time. I call and tell him I don't know if I can accept it, I don't want him or anyone to think I did this for a reward. He virtually begs, saying "you helped save my family. This is nothing in comparison. Thank you." We break down crying on the phone, and eventually form an odd, distant friendship based on mutual respect for each other. I even had dinner with him a couple times when I had to go to NY for biz over the years, and I always buy, because the poor guy has done enough and gone through enough having to coparent with this train wreck.

To this day, she's apparently struggling to stay sober (alcohol and other substances), and has minimal involvement in her child's life due to her inability to show up when expected. Baby daddy tells me she's been in legal trouble, financial issues up the ass, and a string of boyfriends that never last more than a few months. I'm doing well, got married again three years ago, raised step-children, am reasonably financially successful, and rather like my life. Granted, a large part of this story is just karma in action, but I feel like I did the right thing, wasn't petty, and what I did do hit her where it hurts.

TL;DR: Ex-wife fucks my life, destroys me financially, tries to trash my reputation, then tries to use me as a scheme in her custody battle years later. I talk to the court directly, work with the baby daddy's lawyers, and get her exposed for the psycho, lying wench she is. She loses custody, struggles, and the good people live mostly happily ever after.

(source) (story by heymomo7)

#prorevenge #by heymomo7 #pro revenge #revenge stories #pro revenge stories #pro #revenge #revenge story #last10

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fmdjinsun · 5 years

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date: october 5, 2019. location: his apartment. word count: 967 words. summary: jinsun is tired™ but will do as he is told.

“hello.” his voice in the hallway echoed, the camera he had been given to record on trained on his sleepy smile, dimples appearing briefly as he made his way back to his apartment. “this is charm’s sunny.”

this was all his manager’s idea. jinsun would have been more than happy to continue with group activities, but apparently his image still needed work. they thought this would help him. he was sure nothing would at this point in charm’s career and was perfectly content with that. he didn’t even mind the concept of the show, but it was the idea that it would help him that drove him nuts. however, bc was less so. and for that, he was filming on his own terms — late at night, in his own element. they had wanted something softer, early in the morning when he was just waking up, but he felt better this way, felt more comfortable with people seeing him at the end rather than the beginning.

“it’s about 10 pm,” he lied easily, faking a glance down at a watch he never wore ( a gift from a fan, far too expensive and shiny for him ) as he settled into his couch. “forgive me for filming this before bed, charm has been working hard to show you all our best selves,” he explained, setting his camera on his counter, letting his smile turn more sheepish, seemingly embarrassed as he fiddled with the edge of the oversized bee shirt he had put on before he left the studio.

despite what his managers thought, his personality and image were both carefully planned, easily turned on when he needed it to be. just because he wasn’t invested didn’t mean he wouldn’t keep the soft smiles and sweet, boy next door image up. he allowed his expression to become more serious, look more like a member of the leader line. “i know you all had some questions for me but, uh...” as quickly as he put it on, it slipped away, the dimples reappearing as he seemingly searched the space in front of him. “i don’t have my — found them! — glasses on.” he put the glasses on, not even meant for reading, and picked up the piece of paper to read from.

“do i currently live in a dorm, with your family, or...” he mumbled to himself, tilting his head so his hair would flop over the side. “ah! charm was recently approved to move out of the dorms if we wished, so i live on my own now.” the smile faltered, dipping for just a moment to look more thoughtful, allowing a little bit of sadness to seep into his features more naturally. “truthfully, it’s been hard. i had a big family growing up and, with charm, had twelve brothers,” he mused, with a small sigh, bringing back the smile, more subdued. “i have never lived completely on my own before. it can be lonely, but the quiet is nice.”

“the biggest challenge...of living with others would probably be that i am shyer, especially at first,” he explained, gesturing with his hands so he wouldn’t tap his fingers. it would look too impatient, whereas it was more a sign of his inability to sit still. “with my members and my seniors in the company, it’s easier, because i know them well, but i can be quite quiet on first meeting.” the explanation had been given so many times, it didn’t sound rehearsed anymore. it flowed easily, different words for the same song. “but i’d like to move past my shyness and show everyone a more open sunny.”

jinsun glanced at his paper, trying to give the appearance that he really cared, maybe was even a bit nervous about this audition. “ah, i mentioned it briefly, but the hardest part for me now is living alone. i’m still adjusting to it and i miss the noise of the dorms most of the times.” this lie slipped off his tongue as easily as the first had. living alone was a blessing, the first time he had peace and quiet since he was very young. he did love his members, but in his own way — he didn’t need them with him constantly. “the boys have become home for me, so it feels like being away right now. but i — ah, i’ll just show you,” he mused with an easy chuckle, picking up the camera and moving to show the photos in the windowsill, carefully placed earlier for this very video.

“i’ve started decorating now.” there weren’t any of his actual family, the photos of his sisters and mother carefully tucked away in his bedroom to avoid showing them publicly, only keeping one that didn’t show their faces. “photos of family, i have some gifts from the members and my sisters too. it definitely helps make the place feel like home.” moving the camera through to show a wide shot, photos carefully hung throughout, little touches of life were scattered throughout the shot — just not his.

he switched the camera back around to himself, smiling brightly. “doesn’t it look nice? ah, anyways, i should really try to get to bed. it’s past time for me.” he lifted his hand to wave, eyes crinkling happily at the camera in a way he knew fans loved. “thank you kindly for listening to me and considering me. i hope to see you soon!”

he let the camera run for a few beats before turning it off, the smile immediately dissipating as he moved to the kitchen to start a pot of coffee. a quick text to his manager that he would send the file over for approval before emailing it to the producers and he could settle back in for what he could only assume would be another sleepless night.

#fmdshaudition #& self.

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rosykims · 5 years

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A-Z HEADCANONS // DUNCAN THEIRIN

i was tagged by @nordxz thanks so much tash !! i'm gonna answer this for duncan, my babey and the next gen son of alistair and ella cousland 😊😚😘

i snappped while answering these and accidentally wrote 6 pages and almost 4k words so uh. loooooong infodump ahead.

Alignment: What would be their D&D alignment? How might it come into play?

duncan very easily falls into the lawful neutral category, like i dont rly need to give his alignment too much thought unlike with some of my other ocs. duncan is.....hmm. hes a very KIND person, generous and selfless, and tries his best to make people happy, but i wouldn’t necessarily say he's good, considering a lot his issues lie with his inability to act, or stand up to others. he’s guilty of very blindly following the law, or other people's ideas of what's right, and he doesn't really feel confident enough to rely on his own conscience for most things. so i'd say while he tries to do the right thing and act within the law, sometimes he goes against his own values out of fear or confusion or, simply out of ignorance, since he was born into a life of privilege and can't always distinguish what's right and what’s believed ykno

Beverage: What do they most like to drink, and why?

duncan shares a weird trait with both his brother and sister where they all just inexplicably ?? don't like alcohol at all. so stuff like wine and liquors is off the table. he absolutely LOVES tea though. u know that one scene in scott pilgrim where the gal is going thru her list of like 72 teas? thats him 100%. it's his lifeblood at this point, he has SO much of it and a perk of being the heir to a monarchy means he's got a lot of foreign merchant acquaintances, so he tends to order in different blends from all over. he's a chronic insomniac, and he uses it as a crutch to get through the days some times. modern!duncan still loves tea but obviously has a stronger love for coffee, since its far more effective!

Co-Habitat: Do they live with anyone? What’s “need to know” before moving in?

duncan currently lives in the residential dorms of the college of enchanters, while he's sort of aimlessly studying a bunch of subjects he's already mostly adept at. firstly, duncan is VERY sick lol, he was conceived while ella and alistair still hadn't found the cure for the joining, and essentially he inherited both of their darkspawn taint so 🙂🙂🙂 thats always a good time. so anyone who lives with him needs to prepare for 1) him being sick obviously,, throwing up, coughing up blood, looking like a corpse virtually 23 hours of the day lol. and obviously the fear that one day he might actually die. but also 2) he suffers from grey warden nightmares for the same reasons, hence the insomnia. he can go a concerning number of days without sleeping and usually only takes strategic cat naps when he needs to, but obviously he has his limits. it's very rare that he goes a full night without waking up in a cold sweat due to nightmares so. we stan one depressed king ! oh he also is Incapable of locking the door to his apartment. he always forgets and hes too tired to care about people stealing his stuff fkdkdjdjd he would probably make more of an effort if he had someone living with him, but old habits die hard so !!!!!!

Decor: What kind of home do they keep? Are there any defining details?

honestly , duncan's house is very devoid of clutter or personal items in general, which is sad. he definitely would have a lot of decor if he could, but since his current housing is only temporary while he's in orlais, he doesn't really want to get... comfortable ykno. other than that, duncan's home is always kept impeccably neat and clean, for two reasons. firstly, growing up in denerim's palace really engrained into his head the importance of keeping up appearances, so its sort of a subconscious ritual of his at this point. but i think more importantly its because of all the nights when he cant sleep, so during the night with nothing to keep him from dwelling on his thoughts or nightmares, he really needs the distraction, and cleaning gives him something to do. duncan really needs to feel like he's doing something, like he's managing, like he's able to achieve something so cleaning is just one little way of taking ownership of his life.

Escape: What do they do to de-stress? How successful is it?

nsfw warning but uhhh..... he has a LOT of sex basically dkdkdksk u wouldn’t know it by looking at him tho ! bc hes very polite and nervous and kinda shy?? but hes also charming and obviously attractive so he doesnt really lack for interested parties. mainly he just sticks to one night stands, with no strings attached, and it helps him take his mind off things when hes exhausted or its late at night and hes afraid to go to sleep. otherwise he also has had some friends with benefits but usually his personal life is too complicated for a serious relationship. aside from that, he also reads a LOT, writes too – when he has the time/energy – and obviously cuddling sessions with his cat, moira dkdkdk

Fluff: What hits their soft spot? Does anything turn them into emotional goo?

so ik above i said that duncan doesnt do serious relationships but thats,, not through any will of his own. he LOVES love and is a complete hopeless romantic , but unfortunately for a number of reasons he's just very unlucky at love ! 😔 so having an emotional, intimate connection with someone that isnt just sex is super healing for him, since he's not used to it at all. being with nadaia is such a positive thing for him, just knowing that his feelings are reciprocated and that he's valued and wanted.

Grudge: How bad does an insult go over? Do they hold a grudge long?

i think it depends on who its directed at !! duncan usually ignores any insults directed at him because he's grown up being so scrutinized by the public and for the most part, fereldens are very weary of him so he hears A LOT. most of criticisms about him he just.. automatically accepts as fact and really buys into them, bc he has such low self esteem. but as for other people, and ESPECIALLY loved ones thats a very different story!! he's not exactly the type to start throwing punches if anyone says a bad word against someone he cares about, but he WILL personally see to it in his own sneaky way that they get whats coming to them dkdkkdjd usually he'll either find a way to expose their dirty laundry, embarrass them in public, prevent a promotion, something like that lol. this goes double if the insult is directed at nadaia or his family.

Hobby: What’s something they do for fun that might be surprising?

ive already mentioned that he's an avid reader and he likes to write occasionally, but he's also a talented musician! He can play harp and lute, and has a beautiful singing voice ! tho he never EVER sings in public and u have to be like,, a ride or die for him to even consider singing in front of u.

Insomnia: What’s their sleeping schedule like? Snorer? Sound sleeper?

well like i said he's an insomniac so sleep rly is a vague, barely recognised concept to him at the point dksksksk he also experiences sleep paralysis during especially bad nightmares, honestly he rly hit the misery jackpot and i feel so bad like hes indisputably my most tormented oc 🙃🙃🙃 so yea hehe doesnt really thrash around during nightmares but he sweats A LOT and sometimes talks in his sleep. during sleep paraylsis obviouslyy he goes COMPLETELY rigid and still which is terrifying for everyone involved lol. on the rare occasion that he is able to sleep he is out like a light lol he would sleep for 17 hours if he could. in saying that because he is also a Strategic Napper he is usually comfortable falling asleep ANYWHERE, because hes so tired comfort really isnt a concern lol.

Jaded: Do they buy into the “happily ever after” ideal? What’s their standard?

no he doesn't unfortunately 😔 or at least i should say he doesn't believe in it for himself - he's pretty convinced that he won't live til 30 and he's existing on borrowed time as it is, so he hasn't really put a lot of thought into his own happiness or the pursuit of his own goals because he doesn't believe he'll be around to see them realized

Kin: What’s their role among their relations? Do they consider others family?

duncan is the firstborn son of king!alistair and ella cousland, my canon warden. he's also the eldest brother to roslyn and bryce theirin. he's also, obviously , the half brother of keiran, tho none of the theirin kids are aware of that oof. his role, officially, is to become king when his parents eventually pass. its NOT something he wants, due to being so sick and unsure of himself. despite what his parents tell him, he doesnt believe he will make a good king and is really terrified of the notion in general, i guess a little like alistair was in dao. duncan kinda,,, avoids his duties, to the point where he literally LEAVES to live and study in orlais. he still does what he needs to do, keeps in correspondence with people he needs to, but its all bare minimum stuff because hes just. so afraid of it lol. he has a mostly good relationship with his family, despite that – theres some resentment between him and his sister, rose, but thats a whole entire story we dont have time for dkdkskdk

Law: What do they think about abiding rules? Are they selective about it?

like i said before he's pretty adherent to the rules and laws of society tho i do see that as more of a flaw than anything. he doesnt really feel comfortable stepping outside the norm and tends to accept that other people know best ! even if he disagrees he's usually too unsure of himself to speak up. that does change quite a bit once he and nadaia grow closer, since SHE is big on bending ridiculous or unjust rules, but he's always gonna be a bit of a follower i think 😒

Magic: In a magic series or not, are they accepting, or is each instance a shock?

he's accepting!! he's a mage so it would be wild of him if he didnt lmao. during his childhood/adolesence he was kinda harsh on himself and had a lot of internalized guilt for being a mage, bc this was obviously still fresh after the mage rebellions. he resented his own abilities and just wanted to be normal, but that was also him projecting a lot of his other problems as well. he had amazing teachers who helped him come to terms with his abilities, and the best of all was my inquisitor, ashara, who is kind of like a very distant, scary aunt who always had a soft spot for him. she helped him – and alistair and ella – RIGHT after they discovered he was a mage, and she was really the biggest role model in his life when it came to magic. duncan has always looked up to her skill and control and confidence, and tried very hard to match that.

Network: Are they connected to the people? How much do they reach out to others?

duncan has an ARMY of acquaintances and connections due to his family, but doesn't really have a lot of people he considers his close friends. he's super friendly and he gets along with most people, but like ive said before serious relationships including friendships are always a bit complicated for him bc of who he is as a person lol. as for reaching out, he's a very independent, introverted person and so he tends not to seek out other people unless he's close to them or has no other choice. he's very self conscious about being a burden on people or being to “needy" so he holds himself back and sometimes comes across as a little cold.

Offspring: What kind of parent would they be? Would they prefer one, or multiple?

he.... probably can't physically have kids unfortunately due to his condition, and as a result he's never really wanted to think too much about it, or imagine a scenario that he believes he cant have. but if it WERE a possibility, or if he felt stable in his own life enough to adopt, he'd probably be comfortable with just one child to completely spoil. he would be such a good father, albiet maybe not the coolest dad ddkdkdks i think nadaia would be the one who got up to the crazy shenanigans and let her child get away with everything, and duncan would be more of the nurturing, responsible one. he'd be a MASTER at telling bedtime stories, would kick ass at homework assistance, and would sing his kid to sleep every single night (until they got too old for it obviously). ooooo im so IMMENSELY emo abt this au now that i think about it

Pistol: Is this character skilled with a weapon? What’s their opinion of violence?

duncan is a very non-violent person, but he does believe that sometimes violence is necessary and will BE violent if he needs to – only in self defence scenarios though. he's an adept mage, and very skilled with a staff, but he isn't a fighter, really – more of a defensive, protective figure.

Question: How often do they feel doubt? What topics are they defensive about?

oh the doubt is constant with him 🙃🙃 he has a lot of deep routed dread about his own morality and whether or not he's a good person or if the maker will accept him when he dies. he's andrastian but TERRIFIED of the notion that its all actually real, bc then he doesnt know where that leaves him. he has this weird existential dichotomy where he doesnt know if hes closer resembling a grey warden or a darkspawn bc of his tainted blood. he also doubts his abilities and his magic bc he's afraid that the taint just,, makes him inherently a corrupted thing. he doubts himself on a more basic level with like, being a good brother, a good son, a good king when the time comes. he wants to be a good student and partner but sometimes his health makes him feel like he cant, and it weighs on him so heavily, almost all the time. basically he needs a hug so badly its not funny 😔😔😔

Reminder: How are they at remembering daily needs? What falls through the cracks?

uhh its very selective !!! for the most part he's very good at taking care of himself, mostly because he NEEDS to otherwise his health gets out of control, but sometimes he tends to prioritize one set of needs above another,, which usually means not sleeping (the most common), forgetting to eat, not letting his loved ones know when he's having a poor health day which usually results in him getting really sick and nobody is around to help him. he also forgets to do certain things like lock up his house, buy foodstuffs, reply to peoples letters n stuff like that.

Sing: Do they like music? Do they listen often/sing/hum/play songs in their head?

yes and yes !! duncan loves music altho its a very personal and private thing for him. he's pretty naturally gifted with music and gets it from ella, who taught him a lot of what he knows. he has a gorgeous singing voice (i kinda hc something similar to dan smith’s vocals from bastille!) that he rarely uses bc he only ever sings when he's alone or if he's forced to by a nosy loved one or something lol

Touch: How do they handle contact? Is their personal bubble big?

duncan doesn't mind being touched !!! in fact in most situations he welcomes it, as long as its like,,, appropriate and not some random stranger obviously. he grew up with ella and alistair who obviously are VERY affectionate people so he loves giving and receiving hugs from friends and he doesnt flinch or feel weird about just? random natural touches or anything. his ~love language~ is also physical touch so he LIVES for cuddling with nadaia and holding hands and anything like that. however !!! his little sister rose HATES being touched by virtually anybody and in any capacity, so he's very aware that not everybody is okay with touch, and is always careful and considerate of other peoples boundaries. he usually waits for the other person to make the first move, or simply asks them first !

Upcoming: How much do they think of the future? Do they make long-term plans?

he doesn't at all 😔 i mentioned this before but he doesn't see himself living very long, and its really impacted his outlook on life. he is afraid to commit to a lot of things, even if its something he really, truly wants, because he doesn't want to get his hopes up for things. it also keeps him from forging positive relationships. a lot of it has to do with him just being overly polite, but he refuses to make the first move with anything, or communicate what HE wants out of something. for example, his relationship with nadaia could have progressed so much faster if he had just,,, told her what he wanted. she had to make a lot of the first moves in the relationship because he just,, doesnt know how to take chances i guess !!! we love a Deeply Flawed king

Vice: What bad habits do they have? Is there something they would be ashamed of?

Some harmless ones are ; him talking to his cat constantly dkdskd also he has very poor time management skills so he's almost always a few minutes late, forgetting to lock his stuff up, and slouching, probably !!! some more serious ones would be like,, having sex with strangers as a coping mechanism lol, not speaking his mind and instead just letting himself be a doormat, also INTENSE avoidance of his problems (moving away to orlais for 9 years to avoid his fear of being king for example 🙃) tho i guess they fall under the same category oof.

Wardrobe: What’s their fashion style? Do they have any staple pieces?

duncan dresses nice, for the most part !!! again, it's mostly to do with growing up in court and having to keep up appearances, but also hes just. a nice bisexual boy who wants to take care of himself ykno, and that includes hygiene/clothing/grooming etc ! he's maybe a bit TOO reserved tho, he mostly wears dark colours like blacks, greys and brows, but hes been known to wears reds/blues/whites as well, and there’s a lot of subtle yet beautiful details on his more formal attire that might go unnoticed by a casual eye. a lot of his clothes are specifically tailored but he's also fond of big oversized sweaters for when hes just hanging out ! he's got a not great relationship with his body lol so he usually dresses very conservatively, with long sleeves and pants and usually more than one layer, but hes also a thot so !!! pants be TIGHT dksksksks

X-Ray: How’s their health? Any problem areas? Do they take care of themselves?

Djdjdksksndjddjkekdidksjs OKAY WELL if u have read this far than obviously u kno the answer to this question. if ur just skimming tho first of all ur valid ! second of all duncan is VERY sick. he was conceived when ella and alistair where still searching for the joining cur, so basically he inherited the darkspawn taint x 2 and nearly died a bunch of times as a baby/young child. obviously idk how the cure storyline is gonna resolve but my hc is that bc the darkspawn taint is something he was BORN with, not just something that happened to him via ritual, his body is much more impacted by it so even if they are able to find a cure, it wouldnt work THAT well and his health would still suffer bc of the prolonged damage. so physically, he deals with a LOT – intense migraines, insomnia, nausea, fatigue, problems with breathing and fevers and stuff. obviously mentally hes.... not doing great either, tho he’s trying his best. sometimes his insomnia gets so bad he starts hallucinating visions from his darkspawn nightmares, and sometimes he just feel paranoid in general that he's actually an Evil Darkspawn and hes just somehow managed to convince everyone hes a normal person – sort of a weird blend of imposter syndrome and body dysmorphia its. complicated. anyway he has very low self esteem and tends to think hes a huge inconvenience to everybody, and when he was a teenager he went thru a period where he was very suicidal, and ANGRY and afraid 😔 he’s doing better though, now that he has learnt how to manage most of his symptoms and he's not suffering in denerim court. nadaia is also a huge help, though he tries not to become too heavily reliant on her, since he's had bad experiences with depending too much on other people.

Yack: What’s their favorite thing to talk about? What do they go on about?

skskdkdk im already crying hehe 🙂 duncan is so introverted and self conscious of being “Too Much" for other people so he tends to keep his thoughts/interests to himself and stick w just. boring small tall or non invasive questions relating to the other person. BUT if u show an interest and he trusts u then oh boy. hes an absolute dork. he loves talking about magic and having really intense conversations abt the technical sides of it (he and dorian would get along SO well) but he also loves history !!!! before he began studying at the college of enchanters he received multiple ??? qualifications?? (idk if thats the right term but u kno) from the university of orlais, one of them being orlesian and ferelden history. also anything to do with the grey wardens, the blights and darkspawn for personal reasons obviously. He's a VERY good storyteller so he somehow finds a way to make even the dryest topics seem very compelling and Cool – varric would be proud !! he finds the orlesian Great Game fascinating, and he enjoys sharing wild anecdotes about the things he's seen asshole nobles get up to. thats always thrilling skdksksk ALSO. He has a secret interest in necromancy and the mortalitasi (its only a secret bc hes the heir and that wouldnt look ... great lol ) but he only ever really talks about that with nadaia, who finds that stuff almost as interesting as he does. also, finally, he loves talking about nadaia 😊😊😊😊 hes the type of guy who will always namedrop “my girlfriend" into any conversation, loves telling people about her accomplishments and how Cool she is ..... he loves her a Lot is what im getting at sksksks

Zodiac: What’s their astro sign? Does it fit? What would you pick, if it’s unknown?

duncan is a pisces babey like his mother !!! tho he could also be a virgo but,,, i think for now pisces works better for him. he's very smart and introspective and creative, but he has some issues with critical thoughts, avoidance and melancholy like ive mentioned. also pisces is a water element so i guess that makes even more sense, since hes an ice mage 👌👌👌

okay !!! im done !!! i cant believe i wrote all that but i guess if u didnt know abt duncan before, u absolutely do now dksksks im so sorry to anyone who actually read thru all of this, u really are braver than the troops

#/ long post #god im so sorry idk how read mores work on mobile so im just go... leave this and go #anyway consider this a crash course on my Favourite Boy #i love him so much i rly just... start writing abt him and physically cant stop #tagging literally anybody who sees this as thinks its neat btw. just pretend i put @urnamehere and go for it !#oc: duncan

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trainedhard · 5 years

Text

[ CHARACTER STUDY; SAITAMA & HEROISM ]

SO I’ve got a lot of feelings on how Saitama’s dreams of being a hero ended up, so... yeehaw, fellas. Get ready for a BIG OL JUMBLE OF THOUGHTS.

So first off. Let’s talk hero-in-training Saitama. Now I know in canon that he shows little to no actual sustained injuries from fighting, but like... he wasn’t indestructable from the get go. Before he got his bizarre, god-like invincible body, he was just a guy who thought of himself as weak and utterly useless. Even through training and serious injuries, he’d just laugh it off and say it was nothing. Even though he would get INTERNAL BLEEDING and so many heavy injuries, he still saved people with a smile.. all bc he wanted to. Of course, that all changed since his training, but.. here’s all my thoughts in a collective ramble.

could you imagine how much it'd suck to be saitama? imagine wishing your entire life you could be a hero. you knew it was childish, but you still clung onto that dream. youre forced to give it up and when you do, life becomes a living hell for you. you grow to inability to keep a job (though i have my own explanation and backstory about this in my about....) and when you get the chance to be a hero a fiery passion ignites in you.you've been weak and a miserable excuse of a person, in your own eyes, for your entire life up until this point. you train vigourously, become the hero you want to be NOT because of selfish reasons, just because you want toyou finally get to be the strongest in the universe, and when you finally, finally do, and you still just. wanna be a hero because there needs to be non selfish heroes. everyone. fucking. hates you.

you're treated with no respect, you're booed almost to the point of quitting heroism., everyone thinks you're a fucking joke and calls you a joke name of Caped Baldy / Bald Cape to rub salt in the wounds. He was SO fucking excited when he found out he could register to be a licensed hero, but all the H.A. gave him was corruption, negligence, and a lot of “newbie crushing” ASSHOLES. They all seem to think of Saitama as someone who can be walked over, or easily crushed; but of course, Saitama doesn’t let this really get to him.

HE JUST WANTED SOMEONE. ANYONE. TO APPRECIATE WHAT HE WAS DOING FOR THE PEOPLE OUT THERE! but nobody ever believes him, nodody ever treats him kind except genos and MAYBE fubuki & bangeveryone tells him to give up being a hero because he's shit at it, because he SAVED THEIR LIVES but it cost the city. no lives were even lost that day when the meteor struck, and seeing how much everyone took him for granted, really hurt him. he got so worked up that he just about went FERAL (and only seeing genos would calm him) because they were blaming him for saving their lives instead of their fucking new cars.

it just burns my biscuits that so many people take saitama as a joke, because HE'S not the part that's supposed to be a joke. NO. IT'S HIS POWERS THAT'S THE JOKE! he's a guy with serious depression just trying to do what's right. he doesn't want flashy heroics, he doesn't want fanclubs or demand them, he even says he doesn't need fans. he just wants a little appreciation for all the times he's saved the earths ass, but the H.A. has to come in and take all the credit from him.

everyone calls him a fraud and chants that he's a fake during deep sea king. that also really stung him deep down, i think, because here's all these S CLASS HEROES who were taken down with ease and nobody can defeat him but saitama. saitama defeats him, everyone boos. could he have gotten mad and defensive? yes. did he? absolutely not! he selflessly started going "uh... uh, YEA. HAHA. THAT'S RIGHT. IM JUST A BIG FAT FAKE TAKING THE CREDIT. IT WAS SO WEAK I BEAT IT IN ONE PUNCH."

the crowd starts hating him even MOREbut only mumen knows he's a liar. that he really was that strong.saitama could be molded into a total dickbag from all thisbut what i admire most .. and love most about him.. is that he DIDN'T.instead he chooses, time and time again, to let the people hate him. to let others take the credit. to do what the people think.if it makes them feel safer, so be it; even if it hurts, he doesn't care. he just wants to be a hero. and while everyone's always like "OHH MUMEN'S MORE HEROIC THAN SAITAMA BECAUSE SAITAMA HAS NO PASSION" i get MAD!!!

that's a BLATANT LIE!! both are equally passionate for justice, but have yoU MET SAITAMA??he is the kind of guy who has LITERALLY jumped in front of cars to save people.if he could, he'd lay his life on the line for otherseven if the world hates him, he still keeps going, even if it's tough. he's lost his ENTHUSIASM but his passion for justice is NOT nonexistent like so many comparing him to mumen say\mumen is just more DRIVEN.

saitama has learned the hard way that blind optimisim can't get you everywhere. the world's basically spit and pissed on him and told em "FUCK YOU" but even so.. even so he still goes out of his way to be as heroic as he can. he acts like he doesn't care, but he's the same man who saved a man from comitting suicide. he's got a weakness for children because he can't stand to see them upset so he does anything to calm them down/save them.

he saves the life of so many others even if they're telling him he's a fraud. he gave up his hero credit to the cops, who evryone started to think of as jokes thanks to the existence of heroes (even dressed up as one and pretended he was a cop who beat a monster).there's so much more i could list off but just because he doesn't have that fiery enthusiam outwardly showing does NOT mean it's not there.

if he wasn’t so passionate for justice, WHY was he so starry eyed at the idea of being a pro hero? WHY did he do vigilante work for those 3 years? WHY does he want to help avenge Genos? WHY would he go out of his way to save anyone? WHY does he care about saving other people, ESPECIALLY kids?? It’s not easy to be a hero. It really isn’t. And yet Saitama does all these things because he’s got such strong morals, he just wants to help people. He never expects anything in return, ever. He can’t stand taking people’s money, even if it’d help him out, which we know from the fact that genos said he’d pay rent, but was confirmed he never let Genos pay.

despite the world being against him he still is a hero. he stopped completely reporting his actions to the H.A. too, and the only reason he even moves up anymore is bc other ppl report his heroic actions.

Anyways, I don’t really think this could count as a true character study? but then again, all my character rambles about him go under these kinds of things. anyways, i leave you with the set of screenshots i think about the most.

#⌠character study; jonesy rambles⌡#SORRY IT'S MOSTLY ME GOING OFF ABOUT H.A....#BUT SAITAMA ... DOESN'T DESERVE THUIS #i just #have so many feelings #also this is copy pasted from discord #i didn't feel like rewriting it #but i might later #anyways here's wonderwall

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