#or even ruin the other's lives...delicious concept | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

captain-mj · 8 months

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May tumblr endure the pain of all the angst fics on it's sight for eating your askbox.

Well then, I'm really glad you liked the Selkie!Ghost prompt I sent in :D, I loved what you did with it ^^ -X/3NH

(If you want the old prompt just tell me)

Okay new prompt: Ghost is a monster that lives under the bed and in the closets of children. Soap has been the singular person he's haunted, not by choice, just because Soap won't have a single nightmare related to him. In fact, Soap sees him as a friend.

Ghost's kind feeds off nightmares related to them, so he's latched to Soap until he can get a singular nightmare out of him. But Soap is now in 141 and he still hasn't had that nightmare relating to him.

So Ghost now protects Soap because he's grown attached.

(Do what you want w this concept, but I was thinkin Ghost takes a shot for Johnny, but gets that nightmare he wants so bad, it's about him dying in Soap's arms. Ghost's now free, free to choose another contract, but he doesn't want to get anymore nightmares, he wants to be with Soap. (also his family isn't too nice cause "he's the reason SOap doesn't experience nightmares, he's doing it wrong" (No soap is just a massive fan of monsters and doesn't feel scared around them)))

Wow thats a lot, well enjoy ^^

Hello friend! I want to say, I absolutely adore your asks and I'm sorry for always taking so long to answer them! They usually need to be a tad longer than my normal stuff and I want to do them justice! Also, did some very mild experimentation with some formatting/punctuation. Nothing super noticeable but if you notice something looks weird, its on purpose!

Also, Ghost is also a child for the first portion of this. He matures a bit faster but their age gap is only really a year (felt weird writing about an adult monster under some kid's bed)

Ghost had never, ever heard of a kid like Soap. The kid was... well. If changelings were real, Ghost would put money on him being one.

Soap regularly grabbed spiders and played with him. Not the cruel playing of little tyrants that ripped their legs off, but a genuine, loving little thing. He'd pet them and let them crawl over his hands and set them outside when they started to get agitated.

Snakes fascinated him. The first time he managed to see one at school, he came home, sat on the floor and told Ghost all about it. How the scales moved and reminded him of Ghost's arms. Then he asked Ghost if he was a snake which made him lash out and try to yank the kid under the bed.

However, since Soap feared him no more than he feared snakes or spiders or soft kittens, he just went straight through him. It looked more like he tried to pat him than anything else.

Ghost couldn't believe it. Other monsters his age were back home! Bragging! And here he was, taking way too much time.

"I'm going to kill you!"

Soap sighed. "You're always so grumpy. Do you want me to make you a cup of tea?"

"...I guess." Ghost pouted.

Soap smiled at him, radiant. Ghost wondered if he was made out of the sun.

The tea was delicious. He even got biscuits on the side.

"Why do you want me to be scared of you anyway?"

Ghost refused to talk to him about it, worried it would ruin his chances of ever going home. Soap smiled at him.

"Is it like a grade? If you scare me, you get a better grade?"

"Something like that." Ghost agreed. "I need to scare you."

"I will do my best to be scared by you!" Soap smiled at him and finished eating.

On Soap's thirteenth birthday party, far far after when Ghost should be long gone, he asked for some odd things. Horror posters and books about mythology. Ghost knew he was trying to get more information on him, probably to banish him.

Soap never did anything though. He continued to be his friend with so much ease. He also never told anyone else. At some point, Soap realized this was abnormal and instead of panicking like Ghost had hoped or maybe telling someone, he just moved on.

"We're friends. I couldn't endanger you like that." Soap had answered honestly when Ghost asked.

"We are NOT friends."

Soap smiled easily. "I'll get you to admit it one day. I promise." He gently nudged Ghost's shoulder. Ghost hadn't been touched in a while and the fact that Soap could touch him but he couldn't quite touch Soap was... weird. A little scary.

Soap smiled at him gently.

Ghost hated the day that... man put the idea of the military in Soap's head. He inspired Soap apparently. Sent him on this spiral to try to get into the military.

"Fucking hell, Johnny. The military?" Ghost sat on his bed and stretched out. His shadows had shifted from... well shadows into dark clothing. Recently, he had gotten used to adjusting them to look like a leather jacket, leather pants and dark gloves. If this so happened to be exactly like Soap's most recent movie crush, then it was purely coincidental. And if maybe, just maybe, Ghost enjoyed the lingering gazes from Soap, that was also coincidental.

He cropped up in Soap's dreams sometimes, but it was never frightening. The only reason he even knew was because Soap sometimes muttered his name in his sleep.

"It would be great! Going out there, helping people, good innocent people. Going on missions and adventures."

"Your brains being splattered against the ground. Dying. Fucking up and hurting people that don't deserve it." Ghost grinned, ignoring Soap's scrunched up face.

"Stop being such a bawbag. This isn't going to scare me so you're just doing it to be a dick." Soap hit Ghost with a pillow.

Ghost laughed and laid flat on his bed. He went quite when Mrs. MacTavish passed by, asking if either of them needed snacks. "She can't hear me, can she?"

"Course she can. Why couldn't she?" Soap tilted his head.

Ghost frowned. At this rate, he might as well just become human. He already fucking was. "How long?"

"About two years now. She thinks you're super shy." Soap explained, not understanding how terrible this was for Ghost.

Ghost dissolved, slinking under the bed.

"Wait, Ghost!" Soap looked under the bed. "Come on. Are you sad about your family again?"

"LEAVE ME ALONE."

Soap flinched and sighed. "I'll make you tea, okay?" He left Ghost alone for a bit while he did.

Ghost did miss his family. He couldn't go back until he fucking got a stupid nightmare and he was hungry because Soap's dreams were so fucking devoid of any fear. Stupid asshole.

The tea made things a little better.

When Soap finally got everything together to join the military, he was 15. Too young to actually join, but that wasn't going to stop the asshole. He planned to join and Ghost had to go with him.

The problem? While Ghost was roughly 16, he didn't have any papers saying he existed and he couldn't just wait for Soap to come home on his leaves. So he just made some stuff. Fake documents and different things. he was also very, very fleshy. Soap and him had touched hands and his skin felt the same way.

It disgusted him. He really, really hoped that while they were in the military, Soap would learn fear.

But that didn't happen.

Because Ghost was accepted and Soap wasn't.

"You're clearly too young. Try again next year."

Ghost felt his heart drop.

Shit.

This did not occur to him as a possibility.

Soap immediately started in on the man while Ghost sat there, stunned. He tried to smoke away. Dissolve and reappear miles away and back home.

His body refused. Panic flooded him.

No.

Fuck.

Ghost spent... three years? Time was weird. But he bumbled around the military. For the first time... ever, he ate what he was supposed to. Nightmares. None of them were good enough. They weren't Soap. It was better than the nothing he had been experiencing the past 19 years. That's when they reunited again.

Soap flinched when he saw him before hearing him speak and immediately brightening. "Hello... Simon."

"Hello, Johnny."

So Ghost watched out for him. He had to keep him alive and safe. Both because of his job and also because Soap needed to dream of him to set him free.

Soap still dreamed about him. Ghost could hear him speaking his name in the dark of night. Saying it with a tone that Ghost heard other people use in these scenarios. It was different than the playful manner of when they were younger. For some reason, it made Ghost's chest flutter.

Somehow, Ghost became a Lieutenant and Soap became one of his Sergeants. They worked together well and no one ever suspected it was because they were old friends.

Ghost had long since felt human. Any connection he had to being a monster gone. Even if he fed off the fear of his comrades, they weren't exactly Soap. He still had to eat human food and had human problems like cold hands.

Still felt pain.

The bullet went straight through his chest and the blood from his wound splattered all over Soap's face.

Soap's blue eyes widened. He was finally afraid.

It tasted rather bitter.

Ghost collapsed into him and Soap cradled his body. His blood covered them both.

"MEDIC!"

Soap screamed his little head off. So loud and insistent.

Ghost wanted to dissolve. Wanted to sink back into the darkness and hide under Soap's bed again.

"never wanted to join the military."

"Why did you then?"

"wanted to stay close to you." Ghost admitted, panting. His mask felt tight around his face. "it wasn't just a job for me. hadn't been for a while."

"The military?"

"No. Johnny." Ghost leaned up and kissed him through the fabric.

He finally dissolved.

His consciousness floated somewhere. It felt like home. He could still smell the soap Mrs. MacTavish used on the sheets.

Soap dreamed of him. Ghost was rather violently dragged into it, spectating whatever Soap finally put together.

The fear and adrenaline was intoxicating. Finally rid him of the awful feeling of being hungry that had plagued him for so long.

Soap held his body. It looked much worse than it was. The entire world seemed tinged with Ghost's blood.

"Please. Please. Stay with me." Soap begged, rocking his body.

Ah.

Johnny wasn't afraid of Ghost. He was afraid for Ghost.

How endearing.

The bond between them, the hold, snapped. Ghost felt himself start to spiral away from Soap, his body wanting to spin back into smoke.

But he dug his heels in.

"No." Ghost mumbled. "Got this fucking far. Can't ditch now." He had spent the majority of his life with Soap and he was realizing now that he wanted to spent the rest of it with him too.

It continued to drag him and he struggled and thrashed until his eyes flickered open to see Soap staring at him.

"You're awake."

"Fucking hell, don't stare at me like that. And I'm supposed to be the monster here." Ghost sat up, fully healed.

Soap went to stop him before pausing. "Always forget you're not human. You okay?"

Ghost nodded.

"Do you remember what happened?"

He nodded again.

"All of it?" Soap batted those damn eyelashes at him.

"If you're asking for another kiss, you can just lean down."

This kiss didn't have fabric between them.

#call of duty #call of duty modern warfare #simon ghost riley #johnny soap mactavish #call of duty modern warfare ii #cod mw2 #ghostsoap #soapghost #cod #ghoap

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mabelstone · 10 months

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Paramour

trey parker x reader

part two of Try Me as per @dougremers’ request on the last chapter… god your mind is so powerful i couldn’t wait to bring this to life 💆‍♀️

as awful as it is, this may be my favourite concept ever. i hope you love it too

CW: 18+, cuckhold, adultery

The 14th rolled around as quick as can be, and before you knew it, you were kissing your boyfriend goodbye. “Call me when you land. I love you,” you told him sweetly, waving one last time as you watched the cab pull out of the driveway. Almost immediately after the cab was out of sight, you finally felt that excited feeling you’d missed so much creep up again. You pulled up Life360 on your phone about 20 minutes later, double checking your boyfriend wasn’t turning around because he 'forgot something'. You watched his little icon reach the airport, and quickly dialled Trey.

“You alone, baby?” His smooth voice flowed through the phone, causing your heart rate to accelerating steadily.

“Uh, yeah, about thirty minutes ago,” you tried to sound like you weren’t bursting from the seams in excitement, failing miserably. “Come over whenever.”

You lived on a secluded block of land, so thankfully, nosy neighbours weren’t a problem for you.

He chuckled lightly on the other end. He’d never admit it either, but your boyfriends business trips were the highlight of Trey’s day (every few months). “Okay, princess. See you in an hour.” With that, he hung up the phone, and you tried to slow your pounding heart. To no avail though, the excitement of the sweet release you’d been craving was so close, and your heart only beat quicker with each passing minute.

You lit a candle in the kitchen, the photo frame of you and your boyfriend catching your eye. For a split second there, you wanted to call Trey and cancel. You flipped the photo face down on the counter, and the guilt seemed to disappear. What he didn’t know wouldn’t hurt him.

You continued into your bedroom, slipping into the closet to pick an outfit for the night. You scanned your drawers, eyes falling on an emerald green lingerie set; the pair Trey had gifted you as they “matched your eyes.” You, of course, told your boyfriend it was a late birthday gift from one of your girlfriends, and that she bought it for you with him in mind. You admired his naivety.

You slipped it on before checking yourself out in the mirror. It was a beautiful set, lacy and tight with a little gemstone dangling from the front. The bottom half was a thong with a suspender belt with garters attached, all the same beautiful shade of green. You opted to not add stockings, thinking the easier it’d be to remove your clothes, the better the night would be. Over the top of your lingerie, you threw on a loose black minidress with lace hemming around the bust. Thankfully, you couldn’t see the lingerie underneath, and hoped Trey would be pleasantly surprised when he finally undressed you.

You kept yourself busy while you waited, touching up your makeup even though you knew it’d be ruined not even 30 minutes in. You put on a shitty movie and poured yourself a glass of red. Even though you’d seen Trey more times than you could count, he still made you nervous, so a little liquid courage never hurt.

Part way into the movie you couldn’t even focus on, you heard a familiar knock on the door that caused you to jump. You quickly stood up and flattened out your dress, walking to the door to let in your paramour.

Your breath caught in your throat as he stood before you, messy dark blond hair, the most gorgeous, icy blue eyes. He was wearing a black button up and dark wash jeans, and my god did he look delicious.

You exchanged welcoming smiles and opened the door for him. “Missed you,” you chirped softly, pleasantly rewarded with soft, forceful lips on your own, his hands needy hands grabbing any part of you he could. You let out a delighted squeal, kicking the door closed behind you, before he picked you up with ease, hand holding your bum while you wrapped your legs around his waist.

It was as passionate as it always had been, desperate hands clinging to anything in reach, tongues invading each others mouths, hair roughly being tugged every which way. You lived for these moments with him; the only moments where your sexuality was finally satiated. He was rough, navigating the two of you to your bedroom without even having to look, throwing you down onto the bed before climbing on top immediately after.

Your fingers already laced in his hair, tugging at the soft tufts as he kissed down your jaw and neck, tongue gliding across your soft skin. You let out a needy but gentle groan, goosebumps forming on your skin as his lips grazed the sensitive parts of your neck.

“Take my clothes off,” you pleaded, the wetness already collecting in your underwear.

“Don’t have to tell me twice,” he retorted lowly, sitting up slightly to push your dress up just over your stomach. His hungry eyes scanned the garters and matching panties you were wearing, pupils blown, nearly drooling at the sight of you. “I bought you those, didn’t I?” He smirked to which you nodded, surprised he remembered. He placed a kiss to your upper thigh, dangerously close to your heat, causing your body to jerk. He continued pushing your dress up, letting a dark, “fuuuck,” fall from his lips when his eyes met your bralette.

His demeanour changed from slow and teasing to impatient and kind of aggressive. He pulled you forward, stripping your dress off you and throwing it across the room. Your lips crashed together again, his fingers slipping down to your panties, pushing them to the side with ease. His fingers traced your hole, collecting your slick as you moaned into his mouth, spreading your legs desperately.

He groaned at the feeling of just how wet you were, dipping a single finger in with ease. “God, I missed you,” he moaned into your mouth, satisfied with the whimper he pulled from you as he thrusted his finger in and out. You impatiently reached down for his hand, pushing another digit inside yourself. “Bit impatient tonight, are we?” He taunted.

“Shut up,” you groaned meekly, arching your back and clenching around his fingers. He chuckled before removing his fingers, ripping a disappointed whimper from your lips. He grabbed your hips and slid you to the edge of the bed, where he got down on his knees before you. You slipped a pillow under your head so you could watch; this was always your favourite part. He looked so good while he ate you out, and my oh my, was he skilled at it. He slipped your underwear off, pulling it over each ankle before propping your legs over his shoulders. The garter belt stayed on, it did things to him. His eyes shined with lust as he feasted his eyes on your glistening pussy, cock growing painfully hard against his jeans as it begged him to taste you.

His fingers gripped your thighs hard enough to bruise, just how you liked it. Without warning, his warm tongue licking a long, forceful stripe from your hole to your clit, your head falling back into the pillow behind you. Your boyfriend was so vanilla. No foreplay, and hardly ever did he go down on you. You never realised how much you needed it until you were under Trey, squirming, begging for sweet release.

His slow movements never lasted long, bringing his fingers to your mouth for you to wet before mercilessly shoving them back inside of you, tongue absolutely assaulting your most sensitive area. You moaned something wicked, your tight grip on his hair causing a pained breath to leave his nose. He didn’t care though, he loved his power over you.

In the midst of your rushed interaction in the bedroom, your phone must have fallen off the bed, sitting right beside Trey. You were too absorbed in his skilled tongue work to notice the rapid vibration on your wooden floor. He pulled his mouth off your heat, fingers still working you to ecstasy.

He glanced down at your phone, recognising your boyfriends name. He smirked mischievously, quickly answering the phone, hiding it slightly under the bed so you wouldn’t see. Your boyfriend was calling to tell you he landed safely, not that you or Trey could hear. He went back to sucking at your sensitive clit, sensing you were close from the way you clenched around his fingers.

“F-fuck Trey,” you moaned loud, so loud your boyfriend undoubtedly heard. “I’m gonna cum, fuck!” You reached your high with a loud, whiny moan, muttering a string of curse words and your secret lovers’ name. Unbeknownst to you, your boyfriend was listening in on the entire thing, rage coursing through his veins so forcefully, you could practically hear it.

He pulled away again, unbuckling his jeans as you stared up at him, mesmerised. Your chest was rising and falling fast, struggling to catch your breath through heavy pants. "Turn around," he instructed, briefly looking down to see if your boyfriend was still on the call - he was.

Trey was wondering how you sex life with your partner was so boring when the sick fuck was listening to another guy give his girl the most incredible, leg shaking, out of this world orgasm - something he probably hadn't been able to give her. You obeyed, positioning yourself on your hands and knees, looking over your shoulder to see himself lining his cock to your entrance, before slamming himself in hard.

You gasped loud, the first thrust nearly making you lose your balance, but he grabbed your hair roughly to steady you. The sound of fast thrusts, slapping of skin on skin and your pretty moans filled the room. Trey reached around to wrap a hand around your throat, commanding you, "say my name, Y/N."

"Trey," you whimpered, his name coming out strangled from the position you were in.

"Louder," he growled, emphasising with a hard thrust that brought tears to your eyes.

"Fuck, Trey!" You cried through a moan, bringing your hand down to circle your clit.

He groaned as your walls tightened around him, "you're such a good girl."

"M-missed your cock," you choked out, knowing the way you said 'cock' drove him crazy.

"Does he ever fuck you this good?" He taunted, aimed at your boyfriend, who you still didn't know was listening.

"God, no." You pushed yourself back onto him in time with his thrusts, your second peak quickly approaching. "Cum in me, please?" You begged, your boyfriend on the other line absolutely sickened. You'd always made sure he pulled out or used a condom each time, but there was something about Trey that made you so primal, like you were on heat every time he'd walk in the room.

"Are you close?" He asked through heavy breaths, hand releasing your throat and travelling to your ass where he delivered a searing slap.

"Y-yes," you stuttered through tears, already seeing stars. "I'm gonna cum any second."

"Cum with me," he coaxed, holding back until he felt the familiar contraction of your approaching orgasm. You nodded furiously, trying to tell him you where about to finish but the words wouldn't come out. Only the pitchiest, whiny series of moans and the feeling of your pussy pulsing rhythmically. With a deep breath and a loud groan, he came inside you, keeping up his fast pace.

Without warning, a whole new wave of pleasure erupted within you, feeling a warm wetness spray out of you and all over yours and Trey's thighs. "Oh my god," you cried, eyes screwed shut but rolled all the way back beneath your eyelids.

"Did you just-"

"That has never happened before, holy fuck," you panted, Trey holding you up by your hips as he carefully pulled out. He smiled to himself, satisfied. He placed a kiss to your lower back as he let you collapse into the sheets below you. Looking down at your phone one last time to end the call.

i kind of have ideas for a part 3 but idk i feel like this may be a good place to end it. let me know your thoughts xx

#trey parker #trey parker x reader #trey parker smut #matt stone #matt stone x reader #matt stone smut #matt and trey

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tackytigerfic · 5 months

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๋࣭ ⭑☔ for the ask game please! ๋࣭ ⭑

☔Is there a fic concept you have that you'd like to just explain and share because you're not sure you'll ever write it? If so, what is it?

Hello, dear Apri! thanks so much for asking. I have quite a few of these. I would never say never and in fact I have started writing all of these, to various extents, but they have been languishing in my docs for many years now so may never see the light of day.

First we have the Theo Knot fic (my eternal thanks to the Theo Knot anon) and I do really want to write this one because I think it would be really fun to tease out the tone? Like, would it be more cracky or more angsty? I think in my planning doc for this one I had the idea to bring adult Teddy into it too, with a werewolf inheritance and maybe him having a crush on Theo and that would bring tension between him and Harry... Or maybe he even has a crush on Harry and his wolfy instincts just make things worse. anyway I am mentioning this here because I really want it to happen sometime!

I also had an idea for a sentient homes fic where Harry finds out he has a country house (also left to him by Sirius) but that the house is actually "mated" or paired in some way with Malfoy Manor. Harry and Draco hate each other, and their house start ruining their lives by trying to shove them together. Lots of potential fun for healing/ redemption arc/ post-war reparation stuff. Plus country squire deliciousness.

Aaaand one other fic I have a good few thousand words written of is a multi-POV quidditch fic where Harry is a washed up somewhat slutty Quidditch star, and Draco comes back from France and buys the team Harry plays for in a last-ditch attempt to save them from relegation. I had eight scenes planned in the POVs of people like Pansy, Lee Jordan, an OC who is a young French seeker Draco recruits, Oliver Wood, Ron, and so on. I think I also had a scene with Draco wearing... gold... shorts? and then the final sex scene would be in Harry/Draco POV. anyway. i think that would be fun as I've never done a full multi POV fic.

#i wont even mention my F1 AU #the one with the fiery crash #where he just walks out of the inferno #a comes back wrong fic?#maybe?#the french campsite fic where Draco leaves England after the war #the master of death fic where harry can't die and is reckless as a result and draco does die while trying to keep up with him #and then harry goes beyond the veil to get him back #or what about the one where draco is a researcher at the Ministry and works out a way to go beyond the veil to bring Sirius back?#anyway i must finish my current lovely wip and maybe then i can get cracking on some of these!#drarry #asked and answered #wip ask game #rowing and writing

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anzheshyphae · 1 year

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correct me if i'm wrong but, in little mushroom, the kids who grew up in the main city had no parents at any point, right? they're all in eden until a certain age and then get assigned/choose careers that they train for after completing the basic schooling that everyone completes. it's only mentioned that the ones who aren't fit for main city careers are given away to the outer city, where some (but not all) are adopted.

there's no mention of where the kids who stay in the main city actually go. do they just get their own shitty rooms in those residential areas, are they just left on their own? or do they mostly live wherever their training is taking place, in some janitor's closet sized rooms? were there no adults who worked in the main city willing to give a home to these kids/teens? or is it not even allowed since everyone is just supposed to be doing their job like 24/7??

because if so, then the kids who got bad grades, that no one wanted and got "thrown away" to the outer city might have actually been luckier in some ways. they had parents and maybe even siblings, and got to know what being a family means. and words like "mom" and "dad" actually mean something to them (colin for example cared about his parents a lot). the main city people might have had other things but they didn't have families.

which brings me to: lu feng is the exception to this. afaik, he's the only one from the main city who had parents. he didn't live with them, but at least he knew who they were and even saw his mom from time to time, as a kid. and his mom told him stories of his dad even if they had never met, and he must have been really looking forward to meeting his dad, if it would become possible at some point. and this is why it's so fucked up that he literally has to fucking shoot him the moment they meet. like he recognized him. at that moment. and it ruins everything with his mom as well.

so... he did have parents or even something like a family, but then he suddenly doesn't. he clearly still cared about his mom a lot, and he also cared about his dad, despite never really getting to know him, so he carries that bullet shell around his neck. idk what i wanted to say here except that this is probably why he's so fucked up in the head. (like the original reason, or shall i say, the foundation upon which one can heap all the other delicious trauma)

like those kids, his peers, had no concept of family at all, so there's no losing it either, but lu feng did have something, and he lost it, and since the whole thing was so fucking illegal in the first place, him being a result of his parents being epic rule breakers and having super forbidden sex (respect), there was probably absolutely no support or help available. and also no friend is going to get it either, never having had parents of their own.

#in conclusion: there are reasons for why he is literally the King of repression #the part in the book where an zhe realizes he too is carrying around a bullet shell and is like “who's this for”#and lu feng says “my father” it FUCKS ME UP SO BADLY #little mushroom #lu feng

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x-amount-verbs · 2 years

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Gurllll... Your "Begging Forgiveness" Silco POV! 🥵

You know I like to quote favorite parts, or pieces that produce fun reactions, but I seriously could quote like this whole delicious thing! I will try to grab a few though.

“You don’t have a cat,” he points out, feeling quite feline himself with that purr.

I still cannot get past this, from either POV! Just the best! So funny, but also fun/sexy with how Silco responds. ♥️

"... Eyes squeeze closed, and he feels like he’s witnessing something secret and intimate..."

*swoon* ♥️

"There is nothing quite so beautiful as her fallen on her knees before him, flushed and flustered, trembling like a lamb. The things he could do to her…"

Shiiiit! 🔥

"He can imagine burying a hand in her hair, closing a fist tight to the roots, tilting her head back to look at him, to let that want show..."

🤯 Hair pulling... YES!🔥

"If he were to join her at her level..."

Ok so there are straight up like 4 paragraphs in a row here that are just way too hot! I absolutely envy your ability to write that. Smut is incredibly hard for me to write (feels kinda ridiculous that an experienced adult struggles with that, but whatever), so I'm so grateful for writers like you who can pull it off for me! ♥️ Also glad to see others out there with similarly dirty minds. 😁

"Oh to watch her lips stretch...".

Again, several paragraphs here that just blow my mind! 🥵🔥 Ditto all my above points.

"...her well-being is paramount"

And then you manage to end it on a rather sweet note! ♥️

This was absolutely perfect and I must reiterate I could have quoted like 95% of this as my favorite! I hope some of these imaginings Silco has turn out reality in later chapters! 😉 🖤

This is gonna be even longer if I don’t put in a readmore tho

Honeyyyy I love your commentsssss

1) I will never not find myself funny. Vain, I know xD but that but is so stuck in my head since the first time it happened with sevika like 🤦‍♀️ So yeah I had fun bringing it back for sexytimes :3

2) okay but like, isn’t there some project that happened that was just photos of people’s faces during O without showing any nudity? I feel like that’s the vibe

3) 😅 can’t help but give this man a kink for uh… ‘freeing’ people lol. Is it a corruption kink? Who knows

4) YES. That’s the real kink that show up in everything I write lmao, hair pulling and biting probably end up in everything somehow; my thirst invades

5) writing a slow burn means I constantly have moments where I’m like “huhuhu this could become a Moment” and then have to tone myself down because IT HASNT EVEN BEEN A WEEK IN STORY YET so instead we let characters imagine the things that can’t happen yet for logic reasons xD

6) muwahahahahah! Honestly this kind of passing thought concept feels like cheating, cause I don’t have to write a whole scene but can pick just the highlights and not worry about getting repetitive 😅 it’s a win/win lmao

7) I LIVE FOR CARING DOMS. I love someone who’s just like “you’re only fun to ruin if you arent actually irreparably broken first, let’s help you get better.” 🥺

❤️❤️ thank you lovely, you always make my day ;u;

#comment response #abitohoney #wip:a helping hand #begging forgiveness #long post

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baekhvuns · 2 years

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Wait your answer wasn't late bestie. I'm sure I sent it like 3 hours before you replied, hahahah, so no worries. I'm late though 😅

People need to stop saying that shit about 2nd/3rd gen groups. I saw that Chen is having a comeback, maybe once most of them do solo stuff and deal with the army there'll be a full group cb too or at least some type of a get-together. <3

Key was holding weapons in his Bad Love promo shoots, but he was also serving looks akhdiaydushsjsI guess he can protect us from aliens maybe? Bodyguard Minho era 👀 and yeah Taemin gets to live a pretty normal life, so maybe that's good for him, but still...

Omg yeah you're right it's about the quality too. That Taekai shoot 🤗

4th slide I need Ateez to pull devil horns, come on. All the concept photos from XH are so fun, the hairstyles 🤩 Hongjoong would pull this off so so well

I was surprised, but 7/11 in SK expanded their vegan line, like kimbap with fake tuna omg!!! among other things. One of my friends said late 2021 to now is peak vegan experience in Seoul, so I cannot wait. She sent me 4 types of vegan mandu a few months ago and they were delicious.

First time I had vegan nuggets at McDonald's in Holland a few years ago I was convinced they gave me the meaty ones and felt so uncomfortable 😭

Like I said I can't and won't stop your Shitstar urges 😭 some people might feel unsatisfied, but if you can pretend you're writing for Hwa while writing for Yunho, maybe they can imagine someone else instead of Hwa. Been there, done that with some people/characters 🤭

Ohhhh, elaborate on your Y/N moment? Sorry for ruining it, bestie I brought you back to the real world 😅

Yeah the free footie pics are not it :/// footwork yes, foot pics is a no no

Sad ending... I just want them to be together ok even if shit is sad 😢

When I talk to Seonghwa I do look him in the eye and try to embarrass him so we're even. But I can't believe we held hands it feels like such a distant memory like how did that happen?!

"i need this man in me right now, i wish u heard the way i said that just now jkf" bestie what are you saying I started choking while working lmaoooo

That shot of Seonghwa drinking from the Teezerverse video reminds me of that all black vampire situation when he was drinking as well 😳

I know these semi-transparent masks work for people who need to read your lips, but they look so creeeeepy. Imagine seeing these two dudes in nice suits, but they're wearing creepy masks 🙈

This but Seonghwa is forbidden (banned, illegal)

Why is this so funny to me - DV 💖

hi helloo!!

Wait your answer wasn't late bestie. I'm sure I sent it like 3 hours before you replied, hahahah, so no worries. I'm late though 😅

OH IT WASNT??? i sometimes answer so late this one slipped out of my mind bjfbjdj

no srsly,, like waking up and seeing "xyz disbanded" and u just lost a lifeline????? HELL. im oNLY HOPING THEY DO MAYBE SEKAI GO A LITTLE LATER INTO NEXT YEAR AND WE GET A CB WITH BAEK,, chen doing a solo he looking os fine but he;s also doing a face 2 face fanmeet and those sk fans are...nasty towards him 😭😭

LMFAOOOO don't u think he'd sacrifice minho in a battle with aliens,, hoping key cosplays as some insane complex character this year,,, MINHO BODYGUARD ERA????? but the yn gotta be like key BDFJJK ENEMIES TO ENEMIES 😭😭😭😭😭 saw taemin trending today and it was just everyone crying over the fact his enlistment is longer 😭😭😭

Omg yeah you're right it's about the quality too. That Taekai shoot 🤗

exactly!!! the qualoty of kai's shoots and the themes,, NEED ONE FOR HWA RIGHT NOW,,, that taekaikrystal shoot too bestie oHO THE VISUALS they were sm's triple h

4th slide I need Ateez to pull devil horns, come on. All the concept photos from XH are so fun, the hairstyles 🤩 Hongjoong would pull this off so so well

THE WAY MY JAW DROPPED AT THE HAIR STOP???? STOP KPOP NEEDS TO DO THIS MORE!!!!!!!!!! ateez need to fuck their pirate core for one cb and give us demon core,,, full on like that hairstyle like suho in obsession, the crazy dark makeup, pls do dark begging... HONGJOONG ABSOLUTELY WOULD DEVOUR IT

omg???? FAKE TUNA??? YO IM INVESTED ITS SO HARD TO FIND REPLACEMENT ESP IN EAST ASIAN FOOD,, WE LOVE THIS 😭😭😭 omgg stOP NEED THESE RECIPES RIGHT NOW,,,, omg also if u happen to be at toronto's ktown there's a restaurant that sells vegan/vegetarian mandu's and they put tofu in it instead of meat and its absolutely divine

First time I had vegan nuggets at McDonald's in Holland a few years ago I was convinced they gave me the meaty ones and felt so uncomfortable 😭

THEY HAVE VEGAN NUGGETS IN HOLLAND???? WHAT THE FUCK NOW THIS IS NEWS BC DAMN SO GLAD THE WORLDS HAVING REPLACEMENTS BC IT BE SO HARD TO EAT ANYTHING OUTSIDE UR OWN CIRCLE 😭😭 LMFAOOOO BESTIE DSHBJ I BET THEY WERE MEAT AFTER ALL 😭😭😭

i honestly do not care atp bc i wanna do what's got me excited to write something,,, after this yunho fic im going back to hwa for a while bc i can't seem to finish a fic and it'll only make ppl yearn to want more 😭😭

Ohhhh, elaborate on your Y/N moment? Sorry for ruining it, bestie I brought you back to the real world 😅

...so very well pls have a seat bc i had two <3 my dad has this uni friend of his who's son is my age and apparel we were the only kids to ve at this adult-only party it was,, just as u imagined intense tension but then nothing ever happened bc i KNOW MY ROOTS BELONGG TO SHINESTARISM

second one is that! do u know the actor alain delon??? someone in my class is a direct replica of him just longer hair and the way i choked when that person entered in the class ≤3

Yeah the free footie pics are not it :/// footwork yes, foot pics is a no no //// Sad ending... I just want them to be together ok even if shit is sad 😢

i agree bc some of them have weird shapes and i do not want to LOOK. JHDVLHCBCV maybe two endings!

When I talk to Seonghwa I do look him in the eye and try to embarrass him so we're even. But I can't believe we held hands it feels like such a distant memory like how did that happen?!

JHCAWHGDJHCGCK DOES HE GET EMBARRASSED,,, i rmr when u said u held his hands and they were so soft, why would u bring that up again doU u expect me to go on with my DAY LIKE THIS FHEFL

"i need this man in me right now, i wish u heard the way i said that just now jkf" bestie what are you saying I started choking while working lmaoooo

That shot of Seonghwa drinking from the Teezerverse video reminds me of that all black vampire situation when he was drinking as well 😳

UR DONE, UR DONE DONE DONE DONE !!!!

I know these semi-transparent masks work for people who need to read your lips, but they look so creeeeepy. Imagine seeing these two dudes in nice suits, but they're wearing creepy masks 🙈

nO THEY DO! its so trippy to even look at that bc ur you'd just be looking at their lips and im not complaining bc hwa's lips >>>> HFBKFBFVB

This but Seonghwa is forbidden (banned, illegal)

LMFAOOOO?? NO BC, THIS WAS SO FUNNY??? HOW U BANNING A WHOLE PROFILE PICTURE

Why is this so funny to me - DV 💖

omggg thay heart is so thICK,, IS THAT FOR SKZ???

2/2 Not me forgetting to answer everything again lmaooo. Anyways, that BTS quiz was a set up, not only I didn't remember most of the songs on the list I also got my uber driver as the result????

*pikachu shocked face* ur uber driver???? WHAT a COINCIDENCE HUH u mean this one??? or this one????

Here's one for you - again, knew almost none of these, but I got anger issues <3

.... BDFJ CHFH I FOUND ANOTHER ONE,,, felt vv called out

Bestie idk shit about the latest comebacks tbh, it's so hard for me to listen to anything new and I still have so many past cbs to catch up with. I heard Nxde and the whole album, I quite like the title, because Carmen reference <3 but it's like After Like, I'm not sure if I like those songs on their own or because of the samples, hmmm. I also like the b-side called X-File, overall the album is okay, but kinda forgettable. Their previous one though 🔥 //// Only heard Antifragile in passing, so I don't remember much and haven't heard Kep1er, but I don't really like their two other titles tbh. And I'm meh about Itzy's English track, it's slightly better than Sneakers, but...still not it. What about you?

OOOO I AGREE i like the drop of nxde! anti-fragile bestie that's a cunty song,,, miss yunjin and miss chaewon are ult cunts and iM LIVING IT but i hate the "lovey lovey lovey dovery dovey dovey" the voice just ruins it for me,,,, its def better than sneakers! loved the chorus and the "i dont wanna fall for boys like u" reminded me of bbhwa <3 but the lyrics were a little whomp whompy

Model Hwa is real...

KAYQ PLS HEAR US OUT PLS I NEED THIS MAN AT PARIS FASHION WEEKS, MET GALAS WE NEED HIM THERE I JUST KNOW HES GONNA SLAY PLS BEGGING,,, that's exactly model hwa in that au,, what a sorcery everything is coming true, if he gets in with ysl im convinced im some magician <3

Ekhem - DV 💖

BEHIND BARS RIGHT NOW

anon..

#✉️ : ask #dv 💖 anon

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kyovtani · 3 years

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mean dom hinata? explain away honey 👁👅👁

you guys- when i tell you the concept of hard dom hinata is one of my favorites- idek what it is about the thought of having sunshines like him, suga or yams go brutally at me but it just makes me pussy throb so here you go ✨

a/n: i got a little carried away so this is a little longer haha 😀

— cw: hard daddy dom!shoyo, heavy degradation, mocking, teasing and dumbification, pussy slapping, choking and brief mentions of breeding <33

hinata shoyo is not really one who's constantly in his hard dom mood. he's also not a soft dom per se, but for him to become the mean, merciless dom you love oh so much, it does take a little bit of work.

however, it always depends, who those guys are.

one thing hinata absolutely despises is when you visit him at practice, dressed in one of your tiniest little dresses and that one particular look on your face. he can tell the reason behind your little visit by the way you walk and talk once you've entered the gym him and his teammates spend most of their time in.

you visit him a lot, which he genuinely appreciates because he misses you a lot but can't really do anything about it because he has to practice to become an even better version of himself. however, when you come up to him with that smirk and certain kind of playful gleam in your eyes, he knows you're here to play your little games.

and then he just gets to watch the scene unfold.

you becoming incredibly handsy with atsumu and bokuto, two of his closest friends who, bless their hearts, simply can't hide the effect you have on them, especially if you're dressed like that. shoyo also calmly observes the way you talk to his captain, meian, the guy he looks up to, his mentor. he even finds it funny how you keep letting your hands graze over his big arms and even his abs, or laughing about his puns and jokes a little too much than you'd normally do.

in those moments, shoyo just smiles and calms himself down because he knows why you're acting like that. you've missed him and he hasn't had the time to give you the attention you deserve so you're here to get what you deserve.

even on the ride back home he does not say a word and that's when you know you've got him.

because the moment he steps through the door to your shared apartment, he slams it shut and wraps one of his big, calloused hands around your neck before he calmly pushes you against the wall.

and then, hinata just starts chuckling.

the sound of his deep laughter sends shivers of excitement and arousal down your spine and it feels like he's slowly setting your body on fire in a way only he's been able to.

he holds you like that for a good while, just giggling and shaking his head, meeting your desperate gaze every now and then as he applies more and more pressure on your delicate throat.

"you know what, puppy?", he begins, running a hand through his messy curls before he scratches the back of his undercut and then casually plays with the piercings in his ear.

"i actually enjoy these shows a lot", shoyo continues, his facial expressions slowly but surely hardening as he never once averts his gaze from yours all while his other hand pushes your tiny little dress all the way up your thighs, exposing your clothed cunt to the cold air of the hallway.

"all the fake giggles and compliments whenever my boys say something, honestly – it's actually quite cute. i know how much tsumu- and bo-kun enjoy your little visits and even shu-kun gets all flustered when you keep telling him just how 'big' he is", hinata explains, the smile on his plump lips slowly fading away as he pushes his thumb underneath the waistband of your panties and casually rips it with one firm tug, not even caring about the little painful gasp you let out when the fabric lightly cuts your skin.

you just look at him with parted lips, your arousal slowly dripping down your inner thighs and your cunt clenching in absolute disgusting despair the longer hinata stares at you.

"shoyo, i-", "shut the fuck up", hinata is quick to quiet you down, the playful gleam in his big eyes burning with a fire of anger in just the right way; you've finally gotten him exactly where you wanted him, "not only wasn't i done speaking yet, you were also not granted permission to say anything, pet. so you stay nice and quiet for me, hm?"

you start nodding softly, a soft whine escaping your lips when shoyo harshly pushes his thick thigh in between your legs, right against your dripping cunt. your eyes roll into the back of your head at the delicious feeling of his strong muscle underneath you; your clit throbbing almost painfully when you slowly start rocking your hips against him.

"look at how fucking desperate you are to have your stupid little pussy fucked", hinata grunts, a deep, empty chuckle falling pst his lips before he lets go of your throat and takes your chin into his big hand to have you meet his strong, alluring gaze, "it's disgustingly pathetic."

"o-only for you, daddy", you whisper and dig your fingers into his tiny waist, holding onto him as your hips move on their own, giving your little clit just the right amount of stimulation to esse some of the pressure on your cunt.

"oh, really? o-o-o-only f-for m-me? yeah?", hinata replies, his mocking of your words sending you into the sweetest haze of pleasure and you can't believe you're about to cum from basically nothing.

"didn't look like that to me when you were basically offering yourself to my boys", he hisses, suddenly pulling his whole body away from you and with a soft yelp, you let yourself fall onto your knees; desperately pressing your thighs together in hopes of getting your ruined orgasm back, only to fail miserably.

shoyo looks down to you, his rock hard cock straining against the soft material of his sweats and the thought of his weight on your tongue, you whimper softly.

"i don't fuck you for what? two days? and you forget what manners are. have i fucked you and your stupid little pussy so dumb already? because it seems like you're not doing any of the thinking anymore, hm? but i mean, how are you supposed to when cock is all you seem to think about all day", his words ring in your head, echoing sonloudly it feels like he just yelled them right into your ear.

you gulp harshly, your hands finding the fabric of his sweats as you make your way up to him; the thought of having him fill you to the brim with his cock as he says even meaner things to you clouding your mind in just the right way.

"p-please", you whisper and look up at him, tears pricking at the corners of your eyes as the arousal becomes overwhelming and the radical need to have him inside of you takes over your mind, "please, daddy, i n-need you to fuck me."

you start placing soft little kisses on his clothed cock, your eyes never once leaving his strong gaze as you enjoy the feeling of his length underneath your lips knowing oh too well that he's going to take it away from you a lot sooner than you'd expect him to.

"tsk, how unfortunate that i don't need to fuck you. i'll just use my fist and watch you beg for it before i cum all over your dirty little cunt and call it a night", he hisses, pushing the messy strands of his hair out of his face before he moves out of your grip and walks towards the living room.

and just as you're about to get up on wobbly legs, hinata raises his big, tattoo clad hand snd turns his head to the side, before he mumbles a soft, "don't you fucking dare to get up. if you want to behave like a needy little pet, you're going to be treated like one. so, you better stay the fuck on all fours."

by the time you come to sit next to him on the floor, hinata just groans, pushing his sweats and boxer briefs down his thick thighs and revealing his fat, precum leaking cock to your hungry eyes.

"sit on the coffee table", he grunts, sitting down on the couch as he wraps his big hand around his throbbing length and slowly starts stroking himself.

you nod softly, moving to sit on the little table with your juices covering your inner thighs and continuously dripping down your legs and without missing a beat, you spread yourself open for hinata.

"fuck, you're dripping everywhere", he grunts at the sight of your sopping wet pussy all spread okt for him and his words easily have your hole clenching like crazy, making more of your juices drip down to your ass.

"all y-yours, daddy", you whimper, watching the way hinata slowly bucks his hip into his fist, his precum slowly finding its way down the back of his hand.

"of course you're all mine, you stupid little slut", hinata scoffs and even though you see the way he lifts his hand, the suddenness of the harsh spank on your pussy still takes your breath away and leaves you whining and whimpering as the pain slowly spreads in your veins, mixing with the pleasure and basically leaving you high.

"you and this pretty pussy belong to me, puppy", he spits and casually lands another spank on your drenched folds, a loud moan falling pst your lips as the tears stream down your temples and find their way into the coffee table.

"now cut the crybaby shit and get on top of me, show me you're worthy of my cock and i might actually breed you."

#haikyuu smut #hq!! smut #haikyū!! smut #hinata smut #hinata shoyo smut #haikyuu x female reader #haikyuu x reader #choking tw #degradation tw #dumbification tw #mocking tw #teasing tw #daddy tw

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joyfulhopelox · 3 years

Text

Strawberries & Cigarettes

Pairing: Jungkook x reader (Soulmate!AU)

Genre: angst, fluff

Warnings: mentions of sex (once), swear words, talks about death of minor character, mentions of smoking (don't do it kids)

Summary: As a child you detested strawberries, convincing yourself that you have an allergy to them. But imagine your shock when you grow up and realise that your soulmate connection has to do with the wretched berry.

Word count: 7.7k

rating : pg

A/N: This is square 4/25 for the @bangtanwritingbingo (Square: Strawberries) I have not written something remotely angsty in a while so this has been a challenge but i did it! And i am somewhat proud of it! Thank you @mochi-molala @sunshinejunghoseokie for listening to me complain about this it has been a journey. And most importantly, thank you @min-yoon-kween for being a beta queen and trying to read through this mess and managing to make 3am rambles onto words. I really appreciated all the support and tough love! @yoonjinkooked, @sunshinekims and @yoonia thank you for being there and listening to my 3am complaints whilst i was getting this done, your encouragement has been a massive help!

Copyrights @joyfulhopelox for both the work and the banner

As always please leave feedback and/or talk to me as i love to hear from you! Enjoy <3

The sweet, fragrant, slightly tart taste invades your senses once again causing you to sigh in frustration. How are you meant to find your soulmate if this unknown taste is all you have to go by? You couldn’t even pinpoint what it could be, the flavour being unlike anything that has ever touched your tastebuds.

“For real now Y/N, what do you have against fruit?” Your friend, Taehyung, inquires. You’ve adamantly refused his offer to share a fruit snack. It’s not like you had anything against fruit, far from it. You loved fruit. It was just the wretched strawberries lying there innocently on the bed of other berries, tainting them.

“It’s not fruit! I love fruit, you know that! Remember that time we snuck out into your grandfather's garden to steal apricots?” Your friend snorts. He remembers that time extremely well. You ate way more than you should have and ended up with indigestion for days after that.

“It’s just…” you grimace, looking once more at the red offenders. “Those”

“Strawberries?!” It was Taehyung’s turn to grimace. “How can you still hate strawberries after all this time? They are the best berry out there!” As if to prove his point he reaches for one and pops it in his mouth. You look away in disgust. “Oh come on Y/N, give them a try. You never know, you may like them now.” He pushed one towards you. Glaring at him, you rejected his offer.

“Tae, you know I can't! It’s not that I don't like them, I am allergic to them!” He responded with an incredulous look but didn’t say anything. Reading too much into his look you go to defend yourself. “I am! Since I was a child!”

“How do you know?” He raised an eyebrow at you. Shrugging, you tried to find a good answer.

Truth is, you didn’t know whether or not you were allergic to them. All you had was a bad memory from when you were a child. You had a very bad encounter with said berries. It was not a near death experience by any means, and it was not an allergic reaction. You were just a child, excited at the thought of trying a new fruit and so in your exhilaration you shoved it a bit too readily in your mouth. The innocent berry happened to go down the wrong pipe and causing you to choke and your family to panic. Ever since then you had sworn to never touch them again, telling everyone around you that you were allergic. That way you didn’t have to face the shame of retelling this childhood story and they couldn’t try forcing you to eat them.

It happened so long ago that you couldn’t even remember the taste. You couldn’t understand why everyone around you seemed to find them so delicious.

“I- just do ok? I had a bad reaction to them a long time ago, and I don’t want a repeat experience” you shrugged hoping that he would not catch onto the white lie you had just blatantly presented to his face. Side eyeing you suspiciously, Taehyung made sure to eat the strawberry he had picked up, sighing in the most dramatic way possible.

“Well then, more for me” his mouth was so full you could barely understand him. Disgusted you pushed his shoulder playfully. “Ew, that is bad manners. Did your mother not teach you to chew with your mouth closed?”

Taehyung pretended to look thoughtful whilst still chewing. “Nope, now take a blueberry and shut up” he pushed the assortment of fruit your way once again, this time making sure that the strawberries were out of your sight.

“Thanks Tae” you smiled gratefully at him, picking a blueberry out. Before it could reach your mouth, a loud thump resounded from next to you making you jump. Surprised your fingers let go of the blueberry you were holding so preciously.

“Oh man, don’t waste food!” a voice you recognised all too well spoke, whilst a hand made its way past your face and into the bowl of fruit Taehyung had so carefully prepared for the two of you. Long slender fingers wrapped themselves around the green stem of a strawberry. You followed the movement of the hand holding the strawberry to come face to face with the culprit.

“Hello to you too, Jungkook” Taehyung sighs, his smile instantly dropping. “What brings you here?” His deadpan expression was a good indication of how happy he was to see him.

“Uh, it’s lunchtime?” Jungkook looked at Taehyung as if he had grown a second head. “Is this not where we are supposed to eat lunch?” disposing of the green stem of the strawberry, he pops it in his mouth. You wanted to grimace, you had enough of Taehyung making a scene whilst eating that damned fruit. Now you are forced to witness the office heartthrob lick his fingers clean of the fruit juice that coated them. Simultaneously expelling a moan so sinful it was definitely not appropriate for office hours. You doubted it was healthy for your heart.

“Yes, but you guys in the graphics team have a separate kitchen. You know, the one you took from us last year? The big fancy one?” Taehyung was still bitter about that incident. It had been his favourite break room to spend time in. The room was spacious and had more than just a few tables scattered here and there, divided by a couple of couches where employees could lounge during their break. There was also a terrace with a lot more space and a pool table. Most importantly,Taehyung’s pride and joy, a gaming room. He would get lost in there during his break, and sometimes even after work until you would come and retrieve him worried for his health.

That is where he met Jungkook, and that is where he ruined your life by introducing you to said office heartthrob. At the time your department and his rarely interacted outside of company meetings. You were working as a business analyst and he was working as a graphics developer. Your jobs could not have been more different from each other.

Truth be told, you had seen Jungkook around the building on more than one occasion. You had the chance to speak once at a company gala in a drunken haze, where you realised you had a lot of interests in common. But you only got to know him the second time you bumped into him, when Taehyung decided to introduce you two. His handshake and shy presentation told you he was too drunk to remember talking to you that night so you did not mention it either.

Once you’ve been introduced, his presence turned into one of the ones you sought out during lunch breaks, you became more aware of the rumours flying around the company. Out of all of them the ones you heard the most were about him and his love for “dining and dashing” all the women he had taken out on a date.

Normally, you wouldn’t be the person to listen to such rumours and allow them to sway your opinion of someone. But you had witnessed on one occasion how he had indeed left a woman in the middle of a restaurant and fled the scene. After that you wondered if maybe you should be more weary of him and his bad habits.

Talking to him in person was a completely different story. He seemed incredibly shy at the beginning, it took him a couple of weeks to be able to look you in the eyes. Taehyung would laugh and say it is because he had a crush on you but you doubted that. How could you believe that? Not when you lived in a world where lovers were predestined. You were born with a bond that tied you to someone else, a bond that's unbreakable. Your soulmate was made for you and only you. You could have other lovers until you found your true one, you have seen it happen on multiple occasions but once you found your soulmate and that bond was complete you couldn’t be apart from them.

Soulmates, a subject that ruined your life as soon as you became aware of it. At the age of ten you found out that all humans on this planet have a person they are meant to be with forever. A person that is yours, and only yours. At such a young age you fell in love with the concept. Fairies and princesses in the stories your parents would read you before bed, they all had their one true love. When you found out that you were meant to have one true love, a soulmate, you were beyond ecstatic. For years after, it was all you talked about and all you dreamt about. It all came crashing down when one rainy night your father had a car accident on his way home from work. The crash took a parental figure away from you. Aside from having had to deal with the pain of losing your hero, you also went through the misery of witnessing the painful heartbreak that comes with having a soulmate.

Your mother mourned for days, she could not eat or sleep, she withered right in front of your eyes. It was heartbreaking to experience your only remaining parent destroying themselves right before your eyes. You were only sixteen at the time and could not do anything to help alleviate the pain she was going through. So you helplessly stood at her side for another three years until one day, her soul finally gave up.

Her funeral was a relief for you, it meant she didn’t have to struggle anymore. The pain was gone. So, at the age of nineteen, you became an orphan.

Turning twenty and a struggling pen pusher, you met Taehyung in a cafe. You crashed into him soaking his expensive suit in coffee as you rushed out the door, late for work. Apologising profusely and promising to pay for his dry cleaning you gave him your number. That was the first time you had hit a stroke of good luck in years. Later that day, when a text came through from an unknown number you expected it to be an extortionate dry cleaning bill. Instead all that was written was: ‘Coffee’s on me next time (not literally though) haha.’ You couldn’t help but laugh, he gave you a place and time and signed it with Taehyung. That had been the beginning of a beautiful friendship.

For the first few years of your friendship you’d wondered if he was your soulmate; and so, despite your aversion to the concept, you two started dating. It was difficult not to like him, he was good looking and you two seemed to have a lot in common. It didn’t help that the sex was also great, you had to admit he knew what he was doing. But after one too many nights of netflix and takeaways at his apartment, which ended in his bed, you both decided that you were not the one for each other. So, two years into your relationship you separated. Fortunately, the friendship you two forged remained, your bond stronger than before. At the age of twenty three, you moved in together as housemates. It was the most logical thing to do, you were attached at the hip anyway and rent was too expensive for a single person to bear. Twenty four came and went, stressed and always low on money, when luck struck you for a second time the day Taehyung told you a position had opened in his team. You decided to apply and rejoiced when you got the job offer. That night you and Taehyung celebrated with pizza and champagne.

Here you are three years later having worked in the same company, being promoted from a trainee to a junior business analyst, and life couldn’t have been better.

There was one thing that bothered you, and that was the strange taste in your mouth that you had begun to notice. At first it was so faint that you didn’t notice it. As time passed, it got stronger and stronger, until you could not ignore the slight tangy, sweet taste that lingered on the tip of your tongue. It wasn’t a bad taste, in fact you quite liked it. You were just annoyed at the fact that you could not place it. You tried multiple foods which you thought may have a similar taste but none of them satisfied that craving. You hid this information from Taehyung for a while, not wanting to make a big fuss out of it until the day he found you rummaging through the fridge mumbling to yourself.

“What are you doing Y/N?” he stood in the doorway confused as to why your head was buried deep into the fridge. You jumped not having heard him move into the kitchen and looked at him in surprise. The sight that greeted him was something he was not expecting. The hilarity of your wide eyed expression paired with the cheeks stuffed full of cherries made him double over in laughter.

Mumbling something akin to “stop laughing at me, i had a craving” you stood up and walked to the table dejectedly plopping yourself down on a chair. Taehyung sobered immediately noticing the forlorn expression on your face and whilst still wiping the tears from his eyes he approached you and sat down. “What’s up chipmunk?” he could not resist making a jab at you. Sighing you started picking at a stray thread off your sleeve. You decided it was time to tell him what has been bothering you for months, despite fearing his judgement.

“Have you ever had cravings?” you turn to look at him, your expression so innocent that he could not make fun of you for such a trivial question. “Of course I have! All the damn time” he scoffed at you.

“No, no what I mean is; have you ever had a taste at the tip of your tongue, on your lips something that isn’t what you have eaten that day, but it is there continuously lingering in your mouth?” the more you were explaining this out loud the stupider you felt. Your own words were confusing even to you. But it seemed like Taehyung knew what you meant because in an instant he jumped up from his seat and looked at you wide eyed.

“Y/N!” the grin on his face intensified. “Do you know what this means?” he grabbed your shoulders in excitement. “It means that you have found your soulmate!” your eyes widened in fear, your body stiffened under his hold. Realising what he’d said, and how you felt about soulmates he backtracked quickly. “Nonono, it means you are close to finding your soulmate. It means you have met them at last!” When your frozen body refused to move he realised that maybe that was not the best way to phrase it either. But the damage has already been done. Wide eyed, you flew off the chair and rushed out of the kitchen towards your own room, slamming the door in the process.

You called in sick the next day, and the day after, not leaving your room until you were certain Taehyung had left for work. He tried on multiple occasions to coax you out of your room, but to no avail. You stubbornly refused to acknowledge him. Mulling over your thoughts in the comfort of your room, conflicted at the realisation that he was right. You had met your soulmate, just not completed the bond yet.

“Y/N, are you ok?” the worry in his voice broke your heart, but you were too absorbed in your own thoughts to respond to him.

Memories of your parents, together and apart, thoughts of your mother and her suffering, memories of you together as a happy family all swirling around in your head. It was all too much to bear, and in the end your brain gave up exhausted, only to wake up the next day and start all over again. For a week you stayed in your room, but when Taehyung decided that enough was enough he formulated a plan in his head hoping it would get you out of your room. If you refused to come out for him, he would have to resort to other methods. He would invite people over, he knew you would not be able to resist the temptation of being a good host. So that day he called your colleague and his friend, Jungkook.

Later on that night, you laid in bed, thoughts ruminating through your head at a fast pace when you heard voices from the entrance. You could easily recognise Taehyung’s voice, the low timbre echoing through the house. It was the second voice that you could not pinpoint, and so, intrigued you got off the bed.

Your joints ached, having sat in the same position for so long and your head hurt from exhaustion. You knew you probably looked like a mess but curiosity was eating at your insides. So you took the chance and opened the door slightly trying to peek into the corridor. Unfortunately, your room was the first along the corridor, right around the corner from the kitchen. The kitchen where Taehyung and his mysterious companion were now exiting from. Your delayed reaction ended up with them coming around the corner almost bumping into you. Gasping, your eyes took in the unknown person whose voice drew you out of your miserable state.

“Jungkook '' you yelped. Startled at the intrusion, you slammed the door in their faces, your back now leaning against the door. You didn’t ponder too much on Jungkook’s shocked expression or Taehyung’s pleased one. Your heart was pounding, and for a second the blood rush from the adrenaline made your ears ring and your lips tingle. You were so focused on your embarrassment that you didn’t even notice the lingering sweet taste residing on your tongue.

Sliding against the door to keep yourself from falling you tried to regulate your heartbeat by taking a few deep breaths in. After a few moments, your eyes opened and took in the darkness of your room. Deciding that you were calm enough you got up, your legs slightly wobbly from crouching for so long. Turning on the light you looked at yourself in the mirror. Your hair was in disarray, your skin looked dull and the red that rimmed your eyes accentuated the eyebags under them. Grimacing at your appearance, you patted your hair trying to make it look more presentable only to give up after a few minutes. Throwing another worried glance at your door, as if you were expecting the boys to barge in at any moment, you contemplated going out there. You sighed deciding that you didn’t care if Jungkook would think you were impolite, you were not ready to face the world.

For the next couple of hours you tried to distract yourself from your thoughts accompanied by the loud hollers coming from the living room where the boys were playing video games. Too absorbed in your own thoughts you didn’t realise how late it had gotten, the rumbling of your stomach waking you up from your trance.

Opening the door you listened intently but there were no sounds coming from the living room. You assumed the boys had finally fallen asleep do as quietly as you could you tiptoed to the kitchen. The corridor was dark, the only light coming from the TV in the living room where you assumed the boys had passed out. Turning on the light in the kitchen you contemplated stealing Taehyung’s last pack of ramen when a voice from behind startled you.

“What are you doing?” you yelped, not having expected to have company.

Jungkook stood in the middle of the doorway, his eyes bleary with sleep, his hair poofed up and judging by the groggy voice, still half asleep. You tried to ignore the way your heart somersaulted at the sight of his messy hair, the way his hooded eyes were blinking sleepily at you and the way his small yawn made him resemble a rabbit. He was adorable and for a second you entertained the thought of telling him that.

“Food” was all you finally replied, secretly trying to fix your messy appearance. Jungkook hummed in acknowledgment. You looked away trying to ignore his eyes on you. The silence that followed was awkward, neither of you knew what to say. “Uh, I don’t know if that rascal fed you but uh….would you like some ramen?” you stuttered trying to break the awkwardness. His stomach growled as if prepared for your question. You stared at him in shock for a couple of seconds before you burst into laughter.

Jungkook smiled at you bashfully, too embarrassed to respond so you took it upon yourself and pulled another chair out for him to sit in.

The silence that ensued was comforting, neither you nor Jungkook feeling the need to interrupt it with small talk. You observed amusedly the way his eyes seemed to lighten up at the sight of food, the way the corner of them would crinkle in excitement and the small satisfied sounds at the food gracing his taste buds was something you found adorable.

The feeling of contentment that enveloped you was entirely new. As the calmness washed over you, you realised it felt like coming home. Not knowing what to make of it you continued to stare at Jungkook, hoping that the answers were hidden somewhere in his smile. Catching you stare at him mid bite Jungkook stopped and tilted his head in confusion.

“Is there something on my face?” realising you were staring at him for a bit too long you squeaked in embarrassment.

“Ah, no no no I was just lost in thought.” Hoping he would buy that excuse, you offered him a bright smile.

Jungkook had known you were staring at him, and for a brief second, along with the spiciness of the noodles burning his tongue, he felt something smoky intertwine. He wondered if it was the food, but the taste was too distinct. In an instant he could place it, the taste of cigarettes. It was faint but he recognised instantly that ashy fragrance. He wondered if his soulmate was a smoker and if so why would the taste bother him now?

He found out about the soulmate connection years ago and how he was meant to figure out which person was meant for him. Meeting your soulmate was supposed to trigger a taste that was only attributed to them. His trigger happened a few years ago when he started working for the company. To say he was excited was an understatement. He has dreamt of meeting his soulmate for so long and to know that they were in proximity was exhilarating.

In his naive search for them he decided to accept all the requests he has gotten from his colleagues to go on dates. Unfortunately for him, he realised too late that it was not the way to find the one that was meant to be for you. Just like the concept of a soulmate, if it was meant to happen, it would happen. He realised too late and after too many failed dates that he could not rush the process. So he stopped trying. Until that one day when he saw you on the roof of the building, during lunch time. You had no idea that you were not alone, had you been aware of that fact you may have not gotten out your pack of cigarettes. Jungkook could tell by the way your foot tapped the ground impatiently and the way your hands kept grabbing at your hair that you were stressed. He sat in silence not wanting to disturb you as you seemed to be hyping yourself up about something. You didn’t interact that day, but in his head he knew he had found you. The taste of cigarettes on his lips was as strong as the smell wafting through the air.

Normally he would not have been happy about someone who smoked in his vicinity, the harsh smell causing his nose to tingle in an unpleasant fashion. Watching you stress smoke that cigarette with the knowledge that you were his soulmate he found himself unbothered by that knowledge. He knew who you were, your mutual friend being Taehyung. He had introduced you two as soon as you started working for the company.

He will always remember that specific moment, the time when you smiled shyly at him extending your hand. He felt an unusual warmth all throughout his body, but he didn’t realise at the time it was your soulmate bond tying itself together like the ends of two loose strings.

He tried with all his might to figure out whether or not you had the faintest idea about your soulmate connection and for a few months he would insist on taking his break on the floor below just so he could spend time with you. Your lack of interest towards him and his advances told him that you were oblivious. You weren’t treating him differently than you would treat Taehyung and for a while he questioned himself. What if he had been wrong? Instead of keeping up appearances, he let himself slip into the friend's mould. If he had been wrong then it would spare him the embarrassment, if he hadn’t been wrong then it would do him no harm to be friends first.

The memories still fresh in his mind he knew now that you were his soulmate. Still a bit tipsy from the wine he had shared with Taehyung earlier he plucked up the courage and jokingly asked, “Is it because I am handsome?” The shocked look on your face and the silence that ensued were far from comfortable. Slowly Jungkook could feel the heat of the blood rushing to his face and he tried his best to hide his embarrassment with a cough. “I mean-“

At the sight of his wide eyes and red cheeks you started chuckling, not being able to hold your composure for any longer. “It was bad, but you’re adorable.” This time your face turned beet red. You both looked at each other like deer caught into headlights for a few moments, only to dissolve into laughter once again.

That night you talked to Jungkook as if he was an old friend. It felt comfortable to share stories with him, to laugh and to make jokes. It felt good to be out of your head for once. The worries that had plagued your mind completely dissolved in between the laughter and the wine that you were sharing.

At some point during the night you both moved into the corridor in front of your room, both sat on the floor, your back leaning against the wall. Passing the wine bottle in between the two of you the conversation carried on into the darkness of the corridor. The only available source of light coming from the kitchen dimly lighting both of your faces, casting shadows across the floor. You didn’t know when you got so close to him, your skin prickling at the heat emanating from his body. Or when your head dropped onto his broad shoulder, your eyes fluttering, heavy with sleep.

“Y/N” Jungkook whispered and you hummed in response. The familiarity of the scene made him smile. You looked adorable, cuddled into his side, your eyes laden with sleep.

“What if I were to tell you I found my soulmate?” His voice was fearful but his heart was hopeful.

Wide awake now, your head snapped up. “What?”

Even though it was meant to be a whisper your voice reverberated through the corridor. Gasping you stopped to listen for any signs of Taehyung waking up. When the corridor stayed silent you breathed a sigh of relief and cleared your throat. “What?” you looked alarmed at Jungkook.

“Is it that bad? That I found my soulmate?” he looked wounded and you quickly tried to clarify. “Nonono, definitely not bad, just...i am surprised” you looked hesitant. You didn’t know what to make of that information, on one hand you wanted to be happy for him. Not everyone thought like you about the soulmate bond. On the other hand you couldn’t fathom the idea that he may have found his intended love in life. The pain blossomed in your chest and you readily assumed the reason behind that being your aversion towards the concept.

“But what if….” Jungkook stopped. He looked unsure of himself and something pulled at your heartstrings. In an attempt to comfort him you placed your hand on his grasping it gently.

“What if, the soulmate doesn’t want me” he tried again, his voice meek. You gave him a sympathetic look, in a way you could relate to his worries. “There is no way your soulmate wouldn’t want you” you tried to ease his worries, your hand subconsciously tightening its grip on his. Jungkook didn’t respond looking lost in thought and for a moment you thought you had said the wrong thing when you felt his fingers intertwined with yours. The feel of his warmth combined with the softness of his hands cause butterflies to erupt in your stomach. The feeling so foreign to you, but not unwelcome.

“But what if I said my soulmate was you?” he tried again, his grip tightening, as if he was afraid you might slip through his fingers. Your heart stopped, your mind trying to catch up with his words. Taking the risk, Jungkook slowly cupped your face. Leaning towards you until your lips were only one whisper away he stopped. His warm breath fanning over your face, it smelt sweet, tangy. Before you could process your thoughts bumped his lips onto yours in a timid touch. Once, twice, three times, his lips ghosted over yours.

You could not react, the surprise from his confession still wrecking havoc through your body. Your eyes fluttered closed as you felt his soft lips touch yours with a bit more conviction. You almost allowed yourself to melt into the kiss a small moan leaving the back of your throat. He tasted sweet, just like...you could not place the taste, and yet it seemed so familiar.

You jolted out of the trance pulling away from him entirely, almost sliding yourself on the opposite side of the corridor. Like a deer in headlights you observed his every move, ready to flee the scene if he got too close to you. “Y/N”, Jungkook tried to reach a hand towards you. You flinched away from him and he halted. You looked scared of him. He could feel his heart break in two at the sight of your distress.

“Y/N” he tried again but you would not have it. You were unable to listen to any reasoning, your fight or flight reaction at an all time high. “Please go” you managed to utter.

When he tried to approach you again you let out a sob, the emotions of your revelations catching up with you. “Please” you pleaded, looking at him in despair. Jungkook’s heart dropped. The look on your face told him you wanted him gone, and as much as it hurt him he would listen to you.

Giving you one last pained look he turned around on his heels and walked down the corridor, swallowed by the darkness of the apartment. When with a click of the front door you knew he was gone, and you broke down in tears.

“Y/N? What’s wrong?” Taehyung, fully awake, having heard the front door close and your sobs echoing through the apartment, rushed to your side.

“I fucked up” was the only thing you could mutter over and over again. Taehyung was confused. Looking around him trying to find something that may indicate the reason for your cries, he spotted the wine bottle by your leg. Alarmed, he picked it up. “Fresh notes of strawberries”....

“Y/N are you daft? This has strawberries in it!” he tried to pry your hands away from your face to check for any signs of swelling. Your incessant cries lessened at that. Taehyung could barely discern what you were saying and so instead, he hugged you tightly to his chest letting you cry it out.

“I think I know the taste that has been bugging me” a couple of days after that night, you were in the break room with Taehyung prepared to have your lunch break. You had been successful at avoiding Jungkook, and you had a strong suspicion that he had stayed out of your way on purpose. That lessened your worries, you didn’t know if you would be able to confront him about what had transpired between the two of you.

“Really? What, when and how?” you could tell Taehyung was trying to hide his excitement underneath his grin. You refused to give him more information on the subject, not yet ready to talk about it. But if you underestimated something, it was his ability to put two and two together. “Is it Jungkook?” you stopped dead in your tracks, your heartbeat picking up the pace. At your reaction Taehyung almost grinned, he was happy his two friends had discovered each other. His grin faltered at something behind you.

You tried denying it, telling him he was mistaken. but with the sweet taste of strawberries lingering on your lips, even you knew that there was no mistake.

“Uhh, Y/N, I have to rush, I forgot that I needed to send some documents over” he quickly got up and rushed out of the room. Your bewildered eyes followed his retreat only to come across the man that had just entered the break room. You gasped at the sight of his athletic frame dressed in the dark coloured suit he normally wore for work. He looked handsome.

“Jungkook” you acknowledged him with a nod. He stood there looking at you for a moment, a strange look on his face as if he was prepared to say something but then changed his mind at the last minute. Instead he mirrored your nod and headed towards the coffee machine.

He passed by you in an attempt to reach for the pods that were on the table behind you. To get to them he had to step around your still body. You could not move, still in a daze, your lips tingling from the kiss you two have shared earlier. Your hands were trembling and you tried your hardest to stay calm and not give away the mixed feelings raging through your body. You cleared your throat and looked away in an attempt to hide your blushing face from him. Jungkook took you in silently, he didn’t know what to make of your reaction. Earlier when he had kissed you, your lips moulding together, you pressed tightly against his form, hands raking through his hair. You seemed to be reciprocating the feeling but now, when you were acting like a deer caught in headlights, he was not so sure of himself anymore.

Cautiously he approached you, his gaze unfaltering, he was afraid that if he stepped over the line you would run away from him again. He didn’t know if his heart could take it.

He couldn’t imagine that if you’d figured it out you’d react to him like this. He was waiting for you to realise it was him. However, the blank look on your face and your stiff posture told him otherwise. The soulmate connection urged him to take you in his arms and take the pain away, to make it better. But you didn’t know yet it was him, and he debated whether or not he should tell you. His heart lurched in pain, he didn’t know how to approach the issue. Knowing himself he’d make a stupid comment which would drive you further away. So he settled for actions rather than words.

It felt like an eternity until he reached you, toe to toe, his hand hesitantly cupped your face. You couldn’t move, your breath coming into short pants, your heart flipping inside your chest. For a second you feared you would faint, but the warm touch of his hand kept you grounded and so you focused on that. Closing your eyes you leaned your head onto his hand soaking up the comfort. Even though you were apprehensive about Jungkook and your connection, he has been nothing but kind and understanding to you. His awkward demeanour paired with his confident looks, an endearing combination in your eyes. After that night you two spent together in the corridor of your apartment you understood very well why most women in your company fell in love with him. What you didn’t understand though, was why he would break their hearts like that. Thinking about the rumours once again your eyes snapped open and you pushed his hand away.

“Jungkook,” you cleared your throat. You needed to get your feelings off your chest otherwise you would implode. You wanted to make sure you were both on the same page. You didn’t want to end up heartbroken like any of the other women in the office. Your stomach lurched at that, the thought of him rejecting you like he did those women sending shooting pains through your whole body.

Jungkook’s hands stayed a few centimeters away from your face, his face morphing into anguish. But as soon as it appeared, it was instantly gone, replaced by a smile, the same heartfelt smile he gave you the day you met. The day you had signed your fate. The day the taste of what you could place now as strawberries had invaded your tastebuds. He waited for you to say something, he was not going to push you, but his gentle eyes told you he was going to listen to whatever you decided to tell him. Taking a deep breath in you decided to continue.

“I- am not sure how to put this into words, so I am going to just come out with it.” tears pooled into your eyes at the thought of what you were going to say. He nodded but you could tell he was anxious by the way his hand helplessly dropped to his side and started fiddling with his pants. You blinked the tears away but they just kept coming leaving a hot trail down your face. The pain of losing your parents resurfacing at the memories flooding your head.

“My parents, they uh, died” you stumbled over your words, finding it very difficult to get a grasp over your emotions. You took Jungkook’s silence as a sign to carry on, “my dad passed away in a car accident, after that, my mother she uh” a sob wrecked through your body and you couldn’t carry on. Watching as your whole body broke down in front of him Jungkook decided to throw caution out the window and steadily wrapped his arms around you. In an instant you relaxed, the warmth and the comfort provided by your soulmate embracing you calmed you down enough for you to carry on with your story.

“My mother, she died heartbroken three years after my father” you sniffled embarrassed at the snot you could see on his shirt. Trying to pull yourself away from him you found yourself nose to chest with him as he tightened his grip on you. You didn’t have the strength to fight against his hold.

“Jungkook,” you pleaded, slumping against him, your forehead resting on his warm chest. In that position you could hear his heartbeat, the strong thump reverberating through you. The knowledge that you were about to break that rhythm pained you. “I don’t want to have a soulmate.” A fresh wave of tears soaked through his shirt. Jungkook felt as if your sobs had not only penetrated the material but also his heart, the coldness that gripped him rendering him speechless.

Despite the unbearable ache that your words have caused him, he remembered that you were also suffering. He decided that his pain was irrelevant to yours, the soulmate bond that forged between the two of you pushing him to alleviate your sorrow and forget about his own.

“Y/N” his voice sounded foreign to him, the anguish seeping through. He cleared his throat and tightened his grip on you, trapping your arms in between the two of you. You knew you were being selfish, your hard words chipping away at his heart. Despite that he was being patient and understanding, lending you the last of his strength. “Don’t, please” was his last attempt at asking you not to crush him. A plea followed by a soft kiss on the top of your head, his own tears threatening to spill down his cheeks.

His words pierced through you, a heavy feeling settling in your chest. It felt as if someone had placed a weighted lead over your heart. Your mind was fighting against the soul’s desire to mould together as one, to form that bond fully. But by doing so, you were fighting against the laws of the soulmate connection, the broken promise of being together forever caused you to feel agony like never before. Desperate, you managed to free your hands and wrap them around him, your fingers digging into the muscles of his back in an attempt to steady yourself. You let the pain course through you, letting Jungkook’s soft cries in your hair be a reminder of your self-serving fears. His breath was hot on the crown of your hair, his breath coming out in broken gasps and you finally understood.

This is what your mother had experienced. This is the pain she must have gone through when your father was gone. Only, you were voluntarily putting yourself and him through it.

You felt despicable, but most importantly, you were terrified. Thoughts running through your head, scenarios in which you and him were bonded and living a happy life, only for it to be swept from under you. You didn’t think you could bear that, but you knew that what you were doing now was not right either. There was no such thing as a bandaid when it came to a soulmate bond. You would suffer forever and it never got easier.

“Y/N, please talk to me.” Jungkook’s voice wavered but his tears had stopped. He was doing his best to stay strong for you. Burying your head into his inviting shoulder you inhaled his scent, it was something sweet. Sweet like that night when you kissed, that significant night when you realised he was yours and you were his. Trying to recall the happiness that you felt when you two kissed you whispered, “I’m afraid.”

Jungkook had never felt more helpless. Hearing you admit this felt even more painful than you rejecting the soulmate bond. He could do very little to alleviate your worries, he couldn’t promise you forever because he himself had no power over the future, but he could promise you that he would try his best to be there until it wasn’t possible anymore.

“I can’t promise you that we will last forever, but I can promise you that as long as we are alive and have a forever to fight for I will do my best to reach it” his soft words brushed through your hair, the hand on your back tightening its hold. Fresh tears spilled from your eyes, the hot trail competing with the warmth that was growing in your chest. His words were not enough to alleviate your worries, but they were enough to pacify the inner battle between your soul and your heart.

“Hey,” he gently grabbed your shoulders, breaking your hold on him. With some distance now in between the two of you, it was easier to look at him. Your heart broke at the sight of the tears silently running down his face, a contrast to the small reassuring smile he was offering you. If not for the pain in his eyes you would have thought he was crying for you only. However, his eyes spoke of agony for two. The relationship that was meant to be, the relationship that your souls craved and you had power over. The understanding encouragement he was offering told you that he would take whatever you decided. If your decision was to not pursue this, he would accept it and never question it. With this in mind you took a deep breath in, your hands hesitantly reaching out and wiping away at the trail of tears.

“I am afraid” you stopped glancing away from him for a split second. Jungkook’s breath caught in his throat anticipating your next words. You had the power to make him or break him, his heart in your hands. With your next exhale, you let all your worries out, your stance visibly relaxing.

“But I am not afraid to fight for a future forever, with you.”

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thecarnivorousmuffinmeta · 3 years

Note

What do you think would happen if one of the Cullens realized they might also be "in love" with Bella during Twilight along side Ed. Mates be damned (not like their marriages are gonna last anyway), and everyone's on the table (just 1 love rival, not at the same time buuuuut could you imagine the chaos? *cough*). The usual Bella eaten/killed by Eddy boi is def on the table obvie, but like do you think there's a chance he might concede to one of his family (or just any other alternatives)? -Sw

Oh boy.

Why I Don’t Think This Is a Possibility

That said, I have to caveat that I don’t think this is a very likely path (sorry, I cannot resist).

It’s true I don’t think any of the Cullen relationships will last in the long term, but I also don’t think they’re inclined to cheat on one another or fall apart at a moment’s notice. They’ve made it this long, several decades, but more, none of them realizes anything is lacking from their respective relationship.

Carlisle and Esme are very devoted to one another and don’t realize they have fundamentally conflicting values. Jasper and Alice think they fulfil each other’s needs and don’t realize that they share nothing in common. Rosalie and Emmett’s is the healthiest relationship in the house but don’t see their major issues (Emmett doesn’t really support or understand Rosalie and Rosalie loves Emmett mostly for his love of her).

My point being, none of them are going to realize it’s not working out anytime soon. They’re going to need a catalyst, and per the end of Twilight, one is coming. Either a confrontation with the Volturi occurs, Renesmee decides to leave, the Cullen lifestyle changes, or things with Bella go awry. It can be any number of things, and it will happen given time, but at the start of Twilight we haven’t hit that point yet.

There’s also the fact that of the Cullens, only Edward would do this nonsense, and even for him it takes Bella’s delicious blood to grab his attention. When she was an ordinary human, he was not interested in the slightest, not even in her gift.

Each of the Cullens (Sans Alice and Esme) is completely baffled by Edward’s emotional whiplash and attachment to this human girl he doesn’t even know. Bella only becomes a vague concept to them when she enters as a serious fixture in Edward’s life, but even then, they really don’t know what to think.

No one in the family will do what Edward did in Twilight. Look at this girl they don’t even know and say “Ah, yes, I’m in love.”

Now, that out of the way, let’s play ball.

Alice

This actually will work out shockingly well if only because I suspect Alice will come up with the pragmatic solution of “sharing”.

First, Alice is by far the closest Cullen member to Edward. He holds her in high esteem, feels a strong sense of kinship with her, actually confides in her, and sees her as a very close friend. Edward looks up to Carlisle and adores Esme, but it’s not the same.

If Alice sees herself as getting together with Bella I don’t think she’d see this as mutually exclusive to Edward having Bella. Alice cares deeply for Edward’s happiness, far more than she does Bella’s general existence, and I think the idea of entering a joint marriage with Edward and Bella would be very appealing to her.

She’d have to ease Edward into it, of course, as he’d balk at the very idea of it, but I think he’d see it as a strengthening of his and Alice’s relationship as well as having the wonderful Bella. Better yet, Alice can be physical with Bella while Edward can go compose music about their love.

As it is this... This is kind of what happens in canon.

Alice tells Edward that not only is he in love with Bella, but that Bella is going to be her best friend, so he better not muck it up. She has to ease him into the idea of being in love with Bella throughout the first part of Twilight. Then, when the relationship is solidified, Alice is right there introducing herself as Bella’s new BFF. Bella’s friendship with Alice throughout the series is extremely homoerotic and I imagine it remains so after Breaking Dawn.

Edward is very pleased that Bella counts Alice as her best friend, Alice being far and away his favorite sibling and the one he approves of Bella spending time with (generally, when she’s not foiling his schemes).

I don’t think Alice and Bella will ever have sex, per se, but I imagine they remain quite physical with each other and Edward looks on with approval thinking to himself that this is how all female friendships should be.

And if Jasper has the nagging suspicion his wife is cheating on him then he’s not functioning quite well enough to put it into words just yet.

Carlisle

Edward would lose his mind.

First, Edward is very into Carlisle, and for all he insists his feelings are filial they sound remarkably romantic. I’d drop a quote, but it’s pretty much every time Edward thinks of Carlisle in Midnight Sun. More than that, Carlisle is the man Edward aspires to be, someone he sees as profoundly more good than he could ever hope to be.

Edward projects a very similar personality onto Bella herself.

So, I imagine if Carlisle sits Edward down and says, “Actually, Edward, I have fallen in love with this Bella” Edward feels very conflicting things all at once.

On the one hand, this means Esme/Carlisle is collapsing. Edward personally brought those two together and adores the idea of their relationship. Their relationship is what he hopes his and Bella’s will look like and is to him the married ideal of a perfect Mother and a perfect Father.

Carlisle/Esme alone falling apart would give him a complete existential crisis. That’s not allowed to happen.

And then that Carlisle wants Bella Swan for himself?! Edward would be faced with the immediate,horrifying, thought that for all Carlisle is a vampire he would be the perfect man for saint like Bella. Carlisle and Bella deserve one another, would be perfect together, and Edward should not begrudge them that.

On the other hand, Edward himself is in love with Bella, and while he thought he could nobly leave her, now he has to nobly stand to the side and watch as Carlsile and her marry. It’d be a very romantic and tragic thing to do, but there’s leaving Bella to her human life, and then watching her up front for the rest of eternity while bitterly hiding his feelings.

More, Carlisle will turn her. If Bella is his true love, then there’s no question of that. Edward’s seen where this goes with Emmett. He will destroy Bella Swan to be with her forever, and Edward will have to live with the shell of Bella Swan staring back at him, fucking his father, forever.

I imagine Edward desperately pretends to concede to Carlisle, to be happy for the pair of them, but as things progress and Bella’s permanent position in the family looks more and more likely, he loses his mind. He’ll snap and there is no telling what he might do.

My money’s on him mercy killing Bella while she’s still human behind Carlisle’s back. He’s sobbing while he does it, but he just can’t let Bella be tarnished by vampirism, and now he will carry this tragic, terrible, secret for the rest of time.

Whether Carlisle was going to turn her or not is up to debate. Given he turned none after Emmett, I think he learned his lesson from Rosalie and would be more than willing to let Bella go, even if he loves her, should it mean he would not force something she does not want and does not understand upon her.

That said, I think he’d never tell Edward his feelings for Bella, as that would ruin Edward’s fledgling relationship with the girl. This is Edward’s first brush with love and seems to be the only romantic love he’ll ever have. Edward has been so miserable for so long that Carlisle would easily give up his own happiness for Edward.

So, more likely, Twilight would happen anyway and Carlisle would spend the entire time being utterly miserable and pretending he’s perfectly fine. LOOK HOW HAPPY HE IS, ESME.

Emmett

Edward tattles to Rosalie immediately.

He loves Emmett, but he knows Emmett can’t possibly be serious about this, and more, fundamentally doesn’t understand how wonderful and amazing Bella is. He wants to turn her into a vampire, clearly, Emmett doesn’t know what’s best for the girl.

More, a man who would so easily break his marriage vows (even to Rosalie), does not deserve Bella Swan.

Edward watches Rosalie and Emmett’s marriage utterly disintegrate with a juice box filled with mountain lion blood and swoops in on Bella while Emmett is thoroughly distracted. Edward then gaslights Bella into believing Emmett is dangerous and despises her, making Emmett the new and improved Jasper.

Esme

Esme would never tell Edward or likely even realize her feelings for Bella herself. If she did though, she would give up the possibility of a future with Bella Swan in a heartbeat for Edward’s happiness, which means everything to her.

Esme will have no regrets, won’t even smile sadly at Bella, because she has Carlsile as her consolation prize and she gets to see the joy in both Bell and Edward’s faces which is far more important than having Bella to herself.

Esme would live vicariously through Bella and Edward’s relationship as well as the very existence of Renesmee.

Like Alice, this is one of those things that’s pretty much canon. I won’t say anything for Esme’s feelings, it’s more that Esme ships Bella with Edward (and mostly because Edward himself comes to obsess over her), but she does seem to vicariously get her joy through their nuclear family within the Cullen family.

Esme is a very strange person.

Jasper

Edward would attempt to murder Jasper or at least severely injure him. Jasper would be the ultimate threat to Bella, not even a man unworthy of her but not a man at all, and exactly what Edward needs to protect Bella against.

Alice tries to stop the fight, to no avail, and Edward will ultimately lose (despite all his confidence). I imagine Jasper doesn’t kill him, but tears apart his limbs, and uses Edward’s lack of mobility to kidnap and then turn Bella.

Bella has no idea what’s happening and the next thing she knows she’s a vampire and Jasper is telling her they have to leave the area (as he must now leave the coven).

Edward tries to track them down for the rest of eternity. He will get vengeance upon Jasper and save Bella this terrible demonic existence forced upon her. Of course, he ends up lost in Rio.

Rosalie

Edward would tell her that her feelings cannot possibly be real. Bella is a woman. More, Rosalie is unworthy of Bella in every possible regard, even more so than Edward himself.

Basically, Edward would lay into Rosalie in a way that he never has before with all of his venom. He will do everything he can to sabotage Bella’s opinion of Rosalie before Rosalie can even get a word in edgewise. He is successful at it due to Bella’s perilously low self esteem (much the reason he was successful with this endeavor in canon).

Rosalie and Edward get in a vicious fight and I imagine Rosalie eventually confronts Bella, making an opportunity to do so, and both warns her away from Edward, tells her everything, and offers to turn her despite Rosalie’s own mixed experiences.

Rosalie and Edward probably then fight and it quickly turns into something that’s very serious. If Edward wins, he murders Rosalie in the heat of the moment, and then leaves the coven in horror over what Carlisle must think of him now. If Rosalie wins... I don’t think she will, she cares for Edward far too much and would never truly be able to aim to kill or maim.

Edward disappears, drowning in his self hatred, and returns to find Bella Swan at some later date unable to resist the call of her scent. Depending where she is in her life, he likely murders her human husband if she has one and dvours her, as Alice prophesied so long ago.

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therealvinelle · 3 years

Text

Carlisle wouldn’t want to be human

This really goes for most of the Cullens, Rosalie excepted (I think Edward would last one day without his telepathy and superpowers before this happened (well honestly I think his denial would keep him from ever admitting this but this isn’t an Edward post so we’re cutting this thought short right now before it spirals)), but I see both Edward and general fandom just sort of take it for granted that if anyone offered Carlisle a miraculous human again pill (and I’m just picturing that as some hokey pill being sold on ad TV) he’d praise Jesus and swallow that down immediately, and I’ve to see anybody argue with that so here I go.

First of, if Carlisle were to suddenly find himself human again I have every belief that Aro would materialize and go, “My dear Carlisle has been made a human? How tragic! Never fear, old friend, I’ll fix that for you. Om nom nom.” and then Carlisle would not be human. And I’m only half joking when I say that, because Carlisle has a lot of friends, and while his animal diet is all well and good, if he were to actually do something like this they’d be very sad his human obsession has gone too far and stage an intervention. “We’re doing this because we love you, Carlisle. Now please try not to be too delicious. Om nom nom.” And then we’re back to Carlisle being a vampire again, though with slightly longer hair this time.

More seriously, if Carlisle was offered this miracle pill, then as a doctor he’d probably be less than enthused about it. He was there to see what happened to the Native Americans when the Europeans came carrying brand new disease, and after viruses and bacteria have had 350 years and a globalized planet to evolve, our seventeenth century priest is going to be in trouble. He’s unvaccinated to boot. He also has a completely different intestinal bacterial flora than modern humans do, which I imagine would not be fun for his digestion. This guy would be a sickly, constipated mess.

As for the main reason - why would Carlisle ever want to be human?

Before he’d mastered his thirst, then he’d probably feel obligated to. For as long as he hadn’t mastered it there was always the risk of him losing control and killing somebody. In his early days he certainly would have jumped on the chance. But none of this is a problem anymore.

So, to take the reasons why he wouldn’t say yes in the present day - first of, why would he not want to be a vampire? He is past worrying about his thirst. His vampirism is at this point purely an asset to him. It makes him great at his job. All his friends and family are vampires. If he were to become human again, he’d not just suddenly suck at his job (as I imagine he has incorporated his super senses into his work to the point where he would pretty much have to learn everything anew if he still wanted to be a doctor), his brain would be slow and limited, and he could never see his cherished friends, people he has known for centuries, again. He’d have to start over with another fake identity in a new place, and sure, this time he could stay until he died of old age, but he’d still be lying to everybody he met about his identity. Carlisle is very much a social butterfly, and he’d be unable to form meaningful friendships when he could never get truly personal with anybody.

In other words, Carlisle would be signing himself up for a lonely life of being average if not bad at his work. And his work is incredibly important to him.

Then there’s the fact that as a doctor, modern viruses aside, when it comes to health problems Carlisle has seen it all. He would know better than everybody that even if the modern viruses don’t make him a sickly mess, even if he doesn’t join the statistics of people who die in tragic accidents, he could still get a brain aneurism at the age of 24 and his human LARP is over. And who knows, maybe he had some nasty disease lurking in his DNA just waiting to ruin his life had he lived long enough, such as ALS. But assuming that Carlisle says “I’LL RISK IT”, even if he makes it to an older age, aging is no joke. Dementia, gout, incontinence, the general and inevitable decline of his body - this is the looming shadow hanging over all our heads. For an immortal who has seen countless humans succumb to it, why choose this?

And for what?

So he could have kids of his own, presumably with Esme?

He has a whole family. Rosalie and Edward especially are his children. Just, this guy loves his whole family so much, I can’t imagine he’d throw them aside in favor of some faceless toddler concept. I also don’t think he’d even want kids of his own, but I think that’s for another post. And also mostly a vibe.

So he could grow old with Esme?

Again - why? She’d be just as much an outcast as he, and face all the same health risks (except I suppose for the modern viruses, she hasn’t been dead for that long). I can’t imagine he’d want to sit idly by and watch her either die ahead of schedule, or live long enough to become unable to care for herself.

Then there’s the fact that at most he’d have six or seven decades. To him, that’s just the blink of an eye. And, again, a very unpleasant blink where he loses everything, is less intelligent, and slowly dies.

Lastly there’s the fact that the human he was is dead, his time has passed. Carlisle doesn’t belong in the human world any longer. He interacts with it because helping humans gives him joy and meaning in life, but he’s a man out of his time and this brave new world is not the one he once lived in. He would not in any way belong, and I think he knows that quite well.

Just, the whole idea that Carlisle would want this is founded on Carlisle having some sort of innate worship of humans where being human is inherently better. I’m sorry, but that’s Edward. If Carlisle felt this way, he wouldn’t be turning others into vampires, and he wouldn’t have vampire friends all over the globe. To him, thirst isn’t a problem, and his vampirism means he can save more humans than he otherwise would. The remaining concern would be God, but Carlisle’s life philosophy is that being a vampire is not by itself a sin, so he’s fine in that regard too.

In summation, I think Carlisle is quite happy being a vampire, and wouldn’t have it any other way.

#carlisle cullen #twilight #twilight meta #twilight renaissance #note on the intestinal bacterial flora #a study was done on an african tribe whose members were eating the same food as their ancestors had for thousands of years #and a group of regular americans #they switched diets #and the african tribesmembers' gut flora was noticeably decreased after just a few weeks #and as far as i remember this was irreversible change #while the modern americans did not have noticeable change #so if i understand that correctly then this might not be such a big problem for carlisle #but it's still food for thought #and i imagine the transition period would suck #he'd probably just take the easy way out and eat unprocessed organic food #be that hipster #vegan vampire and hipster human #... i'm quitting this 'carlisle's indigestion combat tactics' tag spiral #before it gets weirder #point is this guy would lose everything #he could never see his friends again #and in exchange he gets to give a forced smile and say 'yay. i'm human. yayy...'

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royalydamned · 3 years

Text

SOAKED

|Mycroft Holmes x Reader|

|AN|: I haven't written one shot, let alone something x reader in like? two years? maybe? Reader is written as non-specified gender and is only referred to as "you" , so no pronouns for reader. My love for Mycroft suddenly hit me like a truck after years so I had to contribute.

Summary: Bit of rain, whole lot of feelings, and one love confession. Maybe storms aren't that bad, if they show you that you are worthy of love after all. In Mycroft's case for sure.

Mycroft sighed as he rubbed his tired eyes. The clock on the wall in front of him showed early afternoon, yet cold and darkness spread outside of his windows as the sun hid behind heavy clouds early in the morning. Peaceful but gloomy day. Still, the heavy pounding of rain against the glass of widows and road, as well as the rustle of the wet trees in the wind was oddly peaceful and comforting. He had a hard day of work behind him, and another evening of more work ahead, just another weak attempt to distract himself from a foul mood he was put in because of the complications that came with the weather.

Important plans, well, to him at least. He was supposed to get to see you.

A busy man he was, that wasn't even up for a question. His schedule tightly packed with meetings, paperwork and more than occasional fixing of his brother's mess, or just simply preventing it, it left a very little time for pleasant distractions such as a quiet time spend with delicious cup of tea and your sweet smile. Today was not the day for distraction it seemed, certainly not as big as your company, that left him flustered and distracted hours after you said your goodbyes.

Your meetings were always a special occasion, even if they were short, brief and unfrequent because of how far you lived, Mycroft always cherished them for weeks following, replaying your lovely laugh and almost sparkling eyes in his head as he woke up and texted you a good morning message, or as he layed down to sleep and wished you sweet dreams.

He might have...cared. For you, your happiness, your well being. Much more than he would ever admit, to others that is. Inside his own mind, he knew far too well how utterly enamored he was with you.

The eldest Holmes wasn't the one to act, God forbid act upon his feelings. He could watch you, with crushing ache in his heart and deep longing as you always talked about your newest acquaintanceship, secretly wishing you held the same sentiments as he did.

You never seemed to have a shortage of suitors at your heels, one better looking that the other, with charming smiles and magnetic personas. Likeable, social, just as you deserved. While he--, well, there was no need to ruin his day further with self-describtions. He knew very well how others percieved him and how he looked. Sherlock never failed to remind him if he occasionally forgot.

Mycroft Holmes was aware, that he was nothing anyone would have ever wanted.

The relationship the two of you had now was more than he could ask for, in all honesty. Time spent together, secrets shared in quiet moments and deep trust you held, it was enough. It was all he needed, if he still could watch over you.

Outside a thunder struck, pulling him from the spiral of thoughts that he always seemed to fall into in the loneliest moments. With a deep sigh he stood up from behind his desk, eyes burning from how long he stared into the bright computer screen, and made his way downstairs into the liquor cabinet. He deserved a small break.

His house was dark, almost like a nighttime had fallen outside, but he didn't bother turning on the lights, instead he carefully climbed down the stairs, gripping the wooden railing at the side for security. By the end of the staircase, he deeply regretted his foolish decision, but before he could make even one step towards the nearest lightswitch, a doorbell stopped him.

Confused, he opened the door, only praying not to see his younger brother and his babysitter standing outside, as he had no intention nor the mood to put up with his obnoxious antics this afternoon, but instead his eyes landed on you.

A soft surpised gasp escaped his mouth as he saw you on his doorstep, shivering with cold, your clothes completely soaked, excess droplets falling on your face and the tiles outside, and arms cluthing yourself for the tiniest bit of warmth.

"|Y/N|?" He asked in quiet disbelief, almost as if he thought he was imagining you.

"We agreed to meet after too long, like hell a bit of rain would stop me," you replied with a victorious grin, lips almost purple from the cold and your whole body visibly trembling.

"Foolish," he muttered pulling you gently inside from the atrocious weather. "You are completely soaked."

"You apparently have that effect on me," you smirked, the witty remark escaping your lips without control, and Mycroft was glad you couldn't see the embarrassed shade his cheeks caught. "No, but really, I walked most of the time. You know the tube is too far away from your place, and I didn't have enough money for a cab, I figured it isn't going to be that bad."

"It was."

"It was," you agreed, rubbing your hands together in quick motions, trying to gain the feeling back into your fingers.

"You should change or else you'll catch cold, come." You let him grab your hand, his skin pleasantly warm against your cold numbed one. He tried to think about anything else rather than the feeling of your connected hands, there were more important things now than such minor distractions. The image of you walking outside in the storm, just to see him. Just to be with him. It sent the most pleasant feeling into his stomach, the idea that maybe, he was almost as important to you as you were to him. But that was nothing but a wishful thinking, a desire of a naive man, and that is not who Mycroft was. There was no need for false hopes and embellished reality.

He lead you into his bedroom, the idea of what it would normally mean coloring his cheeks, but he ignored those intrusive thoughts, focusing on helping you warm up in any way possible. "You have to change into dry clothes. Mine should be sufficient for now."

"Alright." Came your voice from behind him, and he turned around to see your topless form.

His breath hitched as he quickly dropped his gaze onto the floor, trying to keep the image he saw out of his mind, out of respect for you. No matter how badly he wished to remember it. Your skin glistening with water, body hiding under the clothes he strangely found himself craving, too primal and illogical for himself to admit. It was too hard keeping his head clear, with the sight from a few seconds ago burned into his brain, unable to ignore, unablet to forget, twisting his inside it certain ways he rarely felt before.

"I will wait outside," he stated finally, pushing the neatly folded pile of clothing towards you without looking up in the slightest, and left the room.

When he shut the door after him, he finally felt like he could breathe easily again. Leaning against the doorframe, replaying the moment again and again, against his own better judgemnet, without the willpower to stop himself, and gulped heavily, trying to get rid of the strange sensation inside of him.

It was like his feelings weren't enough. Like the fact that he, after all, wasn't too different to others, as he was so deeply affected by the helpless emotions of love and how deeply he was hurting with every moment without you. So depended on your presence bringing him joy. Now he steeped so low as physical attraction, pure desire of your touch and your body. He would mock himself if he could, you were just too much.

A soft click of the doorknob caught his attention, and stayed almost staring, asking himself over and over again, why does he love the sight of you in his clothes so much.

You hugged yourself tightly, still trembling significanty, but now at least rid of the wet clothes, and smiled up at him, with warmth only you could muster at such a moment. "This is much better, thank you. Sorry for such complications."

"Nonsense," he huffed almost annoyed, like your health would ever be a complication. To him. Ridiculous. "Come, I think fire and a nice cup of tea will warm you up." Placing a hand on the small of your back, he led you back downstairs, where the big fireplace was. The close proximity the gesture put you in flustered you both, but Mycroft didn't want to let go. And neither did you.

You turned to him, looking up into his face, smiling mischieviously when he caught your eyes. "Don't you have anything stronger?"

The corner of his mouth twitched upwards, strongly liking your idea. "Your wish is my command."

Downstairs, he found the thickest blanket he had, tightly wrapping it around your shoulders, and you snuggled into its comfort immediately, watching him struggle to start a fire.

"I suppose you aren't the one for camping," you mused with a small smile, giggling shortly at his grimace.

"My, how could you possibly deduce that?" A tiny flame sparked inside, dacing across the thick logs of wood before disappearing under them, and growing rapidly. Mycroft stood up from the ground, dusting off the dirt and ashes from his hands and clothes, and looked rather proudly at his work.

"I guess I was wrong. You are full of surprises, Mr. Holmes." A warm light from the fireplace illuminated your features, the growing flames sparkling in your eyes, and Mycroft stayed just to watch. He didn't believe in perfection, that concept was unachievable and he never believed in such terms, but as he watched you in this moment, hair frizzy as they were drying from the water, the messy strands falling into your face, and just then as he watched the orange light color your skin with small smile on your lips , he though you were the only one that came close.

"Well," he inhaled sharply, pulling himself from the love-sick trance, and smiled back at you, the expression coming off more forced than it really was. "I shall go and fetch us something to drink."

Later he came back with two short glasses and bottle of a still unopened liquor bottle, sealed with silver paper and a stamp of the highest quality, almost unnoticable smile playing on his lips as he made his way back to you, where you set cross-legged on the little carpet right in front of the fire. He copied your position, awkardly folding his legs, your knees almost touching, and placed the two glasses into the space between you.

"I'm just," he started unsurely, pouring each of you a glass with impressive precision in the amount, and looked at you again, almost shyly. "I'm very glad we got to spend our evening together after all."

"I'm very glad as well Mycroft," you answered, a fond look in your eyes as you looked at the man in front of you and raised your glass in a silent gesture. He repeated the motion, nodding his head courtly your direction, and took a small sip, watching you in astonishment as you drank it all at once. "Getting warmer already," you laughed, watching the smile on his face widen at your comment and poured you another glass.

You set together for what felt like hours, and maybe it was, in comfortable silence by the melody of the cracking fire beside you, the bottle almost fully drank and the personal space between you long gone. Your feet were tangled together in the middle, knees pressed against each other, both supporting your heads on your hands as you talked, with blissful smiles and faces almost too close.

Mycroft adjusted his posture, resting his chin on his connected hands supported on his thighs as he watched you attentively, noticing and drinking in every detail of your face, your voice your tipsy mannerisms. He could never tear his gaze off you, you were captivating, like a mysterious painting hanging in the gallery, attracting everyone to look, to try to figure it out, and know everything about it. But he knew everything about you, and still he wanted to learn even more. Secrets you never told him, things he simply couldn't just see. Every morning he wanted to see your face, to give him the strenght to go through it, and ever evening he wanted to come back to it, because you felt like home. And Mycroft hated himself for being so melodramatic. This wasn't him, all these thoughts, all these emotions, they were stronger than his healthy judgement, which was already clouded by alcohol.

"Wasn't your partner worried, just going outside in such a storm?" You huffed out a breath, both amusement and annoyance mixing in that display of emotion, and Mycroft quite couldn't place, what it meant.

"We broke up several days ago."

"I am very sorry to hear that," he said genuinely, even though inside he felt selfish joy that he won't have to hear about yet another perfect match for you, another reminder of everything he wasn't. And could never be. Nothing you wanted nor needed.

"Don't be, nobody I met yet was really for me," you mumbled, dropping your eyes into the empty glass in your hands, brows furrowed in deep thought.

"Why is that?" He took the last sip from his glass and carefully set it on the coffee table by his side, his full attention at you again.

"When you meet so many people, good-looking, charming and kind people, but none of them fits you, none of them is right because you set impossible standard, almost unachievable by most people." You set aside your own glass, shifting even closer to him, hearing how he took in a sharp breath, hesitantly straightening his back.

"That must happen when one deserves perfection," he answered looking longinly into your eyes, unable to look away. You were truly hypnotising, the only thing he could look at hours without a break and never get tired. The only person he grew to love so deeply. Truly one of a kind.

"Oh, not perfection, heavens no," you laghed, throwing your head back a little at that, and he still couldn't look away. Why was it so amusing, someone as perfect, as flawless, deserved nothing less than the same. "The thing being, that it's too far from perfection, and in a world where people desire nothing more than to eliminate their flaws, something perfectly imperfect is unachievable."

You leaned closer to him, licking your lips, already pink and sweet again, without realizing, and he almost lost his control. Swallowing heavily, he forced himself to look back into your eyes, trying to forget about the questions appearing in his mind. How would your lips possibly taste? How would it feel having you so close? Heating you up with his own body, blanket too long forgotten?

He couldn't think that way. He had to collect himself, but he didn't know how. Subconciously, he leaned in as well, the gap between your faces just inches apart, your breaths almost shared in one, and it felt like he was dreaming. If that was the truth, he never wanted to wake up.

"They all lacked just one thing though," you whispered, placing your hand on his leg for support, making Mycroft to freeze completely, too disturbed by the contact and the overwhelming heat it sent through his body to think about anything else.

"That being?" he forced himself to say, his throat tight and voice quiet, almost as if he had lost his breath.

"They just weren't...you." A simple statement, a plain sentence bearing more meaning than most conversations he had been part of. His gaze abruptly shot back up, cathing he own almost instantly, but no words made their way out. He couldn't talk nor move, shock too obvious on his features, that even a child would know.

His hands moved on his own, the other times brilliant brain, his biggest pride during his whole life now shut off by a few simple words, his body moving without a single though. Your cheek was warm already, burning hot under his skin as he gently caressed it, moving out a fallen strand from your face, tracing your cheekbone with his thumb like you were the most fragile thing in the world.

"May I kiss you?" you breathed out, your eyes looking up at him, sparkling with emotion he thought he would never see in them, and he nodded, fulfilling himself the one wish that seemed too impossible for a realistic man to hold.

Your lips met in the middle, slow and hesitant as you both silently prayed you wouldn't wake u in the middle of the nigh and find out it was yet another dream.

He sighed deeply into the kiss as you moved to sit in his lap and deepened the kiss, pressing your lips against his more roughly, more needily, hands carefully placed on his neck and your whole body so deliciously pressed against his. So hot and soft, an opposite picture to your arrival, sinding the most pleasant shivers through his whole body with every slight movement in his arms. Mycroft's arms ended up wrapped around your waist, tightly cluthing your body to his like he was afraid you would leave. He couldn't let go. He never wanted to let go.

After a short while, seconds, maybe minutes, he didn't know, the best moments of his life, you pulled away, only slightly to cath your breath, and rested your own forehead against his. He could smell the rain in your hair and your unique scent all around him, and he wanted to remember it all. Every single detail, to replay it, to dream it. To live it.

"I love you," he said quietly, too long of a silence from his last words, and finally gather up the courage to open his eyes and look at you again. At your glowing eyes and wide smile, at your messy hair and body tangled in his blanket, in his own gaze, you were the perfect everyone seeked.

"I love you too Mycroft."

And he never wanted to hear a sentence repeated so much as in that moment. Fortunately, you would never get tired of saying it.

#mycroft holmes #mycroft holmes x reader #sherlock #sherlock bbc

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ashfae · 3 years

Note

i request that u do go on at length about how most of the united kingdom of great britain and northern ireland does not understand chocolate chip cookies. u are welcome.

All right, you asked for it. I will preface by stating I have lived in the US for 23 years and Scotland for 19 years and as such my knowledge and opinions are not so much informed as very mixed up. (see also my spelling)

So. Biscuits and cookies.

The common statement is that in America it's a cookie and in the UK it's a biscuit. This is both true and misleading. Let us define our terms.

Generally speaking, cookies in America are about the size of your palm, usually soft and chewy rather than hard and crunchy. Some will even call them a bit cakelike. (Trivia: the word 'cookie' comes from the Dutch word 'koekje', or 'little cake'.) Sure, there are exceptions, especially if you're making them at home and have added too little flour or butter that's too soft or baked them so long that they've turned into charcoal briquettes. But the best type of cookie has a little bite to it (al dente, like pasta!) and then turns into softness on the inside. Also, they're inevitably sweet. They're best when fresh out of the oven and a smidgen gooey and if you take chocolate chip cookie dough and refrigerate it and then eat it it's divine. Cookies are a dessert.

The UK's biscuits are not cookies. They are smaller, easily half or a third the size of an American cookie. They are definitely crunchy. Also they are not necessarily sweet. It is difficult for me to describe the concept of the digestive biscuit because after almost two decades of living here I still find them to be these bizarre neither sweet nor savoury neutral things that seem pointless and pleasureless. Biscuits are lighter and less dense than cookies and not at all cakelike. They are not a dessert so much as a thing designed to be eaten alongside a hot drink, and also to be dunked into it. The hard crunchiness that at first seems a sad reminder of lost cookies from across the pond is actually very practical as it helps keep the biscuit from falling into your tea/coffee/hot chocolate and becoming a sad mess of soggy crumbs ruining your drink. They are not cookies but they are delightful in their way. They are usually not very satisfying without a hot drink to accompany them, though there are notable exceptions such as custard creams. (Also the chocolate caramel digestive, which transcends all natural laws of biscuits and digestives and has achieved a deliciousness I cannot properly explicate)

As a side note, hot drinks are not an affectation here but a necessity because everything you've ever heard about rainy cold weather in the UK is true and the cold moldy damp seeps into your bones in a way it just doesn't anywhere in the US and there's a reason we're all so religious about our hot drink of choice and getting regular access to it. I still don't like tea and expect the immigration authorities to discover this and kick me out of the country at any time.

So far, fair enough. For the most part the US and UK acknowledge each other's cookie/biscuit differences, and even regard them with affection. There is some overlap. You can find US style cookies in UK supermarkets, and they will be proper cookies, chewy and delicious and not really suitable for dunking. Best of both worlds, yes?

Alas, there are a few catches.

First off, too often when you are offered a chocolate chip cookie, you are not given a cookie. You are given a chocolate chip biscuit. It will be small and hard and have teeny tiny chips and be okay if it's dipped into a hot drink but not really appealing otherwise. This is fine if it's what you expect but sad if what you wanted was a chocolate chip cookie. My theory is that the phrase "chocolate chip cookie" is so ubiquitous that even if in a biscuit assortment everything else is called a biscuit, the chocolate chip thing will be called a cookie despite manifestly not being one.

But second. Second is the difficulty of buying chocolate chips for baking with.

In the US when baking chocolate chip cookies, you get a bag, usually 12oz. My heart belongs to Tollhouse semisweet chips and I bring back several packs every time I'm in the US. These added to a recipe will make a roughly 40 cookies. A 12oz bag is heftyish, not at all hard to lift but awkward enough that you couldn't juggle it easily.

I can only guess that no one in the UK bakes more than six or seven chocolate chip biscuits at a time and no one at all bakes chocolate chip cookies, because for years all I could find were titchy little 100g bags of substandard milk chocolate chips, where the chips were as small and uninteresting as the bag they came in. TITCHY, I tell you. 100g = 3.5oz (roughly), so I'd need four of them to make a US style batch of chocolate chip cookies. There are better ones available now (thank you, Dr. Oekter) with much better chocolate plus the chip size is large enough that you can actually taste it, as opposed to it just ending up as a tiny smudge that once saw chocolate from a distance. The bags still tend to come in only 100g amounts. I've never bothered figuring out how to make a small enough batch of cookies that 100g of chips would be enough, there hardly seems any point. I think they're sold to be used as decorations more than chocolate chip cookie essential ingredients.

There are exceptions, of course, places that sell larger bags of chips for those of us passionately determined to bake chocolate chip cookies as opposed to biscuits (looking at you Lakeland, thanks). But on the whole chocolate chip cookies are not as big a thing in the UK as in the US, and most of the UK does not know what it's missing and thinks small hard chocolate chip biscuits or grocery store made preservative-laden cookies are sufficient, and have never had fresh baked melty chewy chocolate chip cookies with decent chips, and that seems a pity to me. I am amending this where I can, however. My most enthusiastic converts are my in-laws, and I have been known to pay for goods and services with chocolate chip cookies. Fortunately I have an excellent recipe (the Tollhouse one, but with some minor tinkering and a secret ingredient). They are delicious but dangerously addictive, which is excellent for my plan to convert those around me to their service and gradually turn the whole of the UK into my own chocolate chip cookie empire. All hail Ruth Graves Wakefield!

This concludes my babbling about chocolate chip cookies for today. Tune in next time when I'll reveal my other nefarious plan to force the UK to understand and accept pumpkin pie.

#in which I babble #don't say you didn't ask #chocolate chip cookies #damn I really want some now #chocolate caramel digestives are ineffable

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malereader-inserts · 4 years

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Greetings from the Avengers’ Base

Fandom: Avengers Pairing: Avengers & Male!Reader Summary: How you got close to the original six Avengers Word Count: 1,291 Request: I saw ur post & thought... maybe how the reader got to know each avenger and how they became friends / a team. Some fluffy friendship shorts :3 Love ur writing, bo <3 A/n: FUCK CANON TIMELINE, WE’RE MAKING OUR OWN.

Being an orphan teenager with nothing better in your life going for you, it’s hard.

It’s strange when you’re a superhero and currently living at Avengers, under the parental care of Nicholas Fury, who has expressed that does not mean you can call him dad. Not that you wanted to anyway. You’ve been an Avenger since you were fourteen, when the first time the Avengers got together, you were part of the original group.

At first, it was daunting, no one understood why you were there and there were times you wondered why you were there too. You were too young and especially fighting for the world. You proved yourself, immensely, to the team. One by one they took turns to get to know you. They didn’t want to overwhelm you.

Tony took you under his wing, seeing a bright young man with a bright future ahead of him. He helped you with school work, he acted like a father to you. Just because the constant thought that ran through Tony’s mind was that he would be a better father than his father will ever be. He would drop anything, press meetings, conference, anything if you asked him to come play catch with him.

You looked up to Tony, you saw a side of him not many people see. You enjoyed hanging around his tower, you were fascinated with JARVIS. You watched how Tony would ramble with his robots, you got friendly with Dum-E.

You would always see Tony as your dad, in fact, Tony has been fighting for your custody, to finally adopt you. It shocked Pepper and Rhodey that he wanted to do this in his own accord.

“I’m gonna make you a Stark, one day kid.”

You smiled, leaning against his lab desk, “Good luck on that, papers are hard to convince even if you’re a billionaire.”

“A challenge worth defeating.”

Steve was the one the came around next, whilst he heavily disapprove you being part of the team, he started to get close to you when you were asking his time back in his era. You were heavily invested in your history class and when the 30s came as a topic, you knew who to ask about the times. It was nice to Steve, it allowed him to think about his days.

He likes the modern times, but he misses when times were simpler. It’s still hard for him to grasp new concepts. Then, you started to gush about his drawing that you begged him to teach you, you were a blast to be with. Whilst he taught you how to draw, you taught him the new stuff. You kept him young and never left him confused, for that he was eternally grateful for you. In fact, to this day you were still helping him out.

“So, what is tumblr?”

“Hell.”

“Wha-?”

“Just don’t touch it, Steve.”

Bruce was easy to get along when Tony was busy and you needed help on your science homework, Bruce was the next best thing. Whilst you were above average in intelligence, sometimes Bruce can lose you at times. But, once Bruce got over his fear of accidentally hulking out on you, he would talk non stop.

He’s actually a funny guy.

He can help you with Biology and Chemistry, even if you just wanted additional readings to get ahead of your peers, but when you come bouncing into the labs asking about Physics, you’ve never seen Bruce light up brighter than a Christmas tree. He gets way into it, it makes you laugh because, after a long rant - where has most definitely lost you, he looks at you asking if you got that.

To which you blankly stare at him and say no.

“Really?”

“Yeah, sorry, Bruce,” You apologised as he waves you off.

“It’s okay, I’ll go slower this time...”

“Oh god.”

Thor was confused to why a baby is on the team, after all, age is different between the two realms. You had to explain that you weren’t a babe, that you were a pre-teen and that you’re actually grown to an extent. Nevertheless, Thor had to adjust to Midgard life for a bit, that means you would experiment cooking on the poor God. You were alright at cooking at least for someone at your age.

But, there are days you feel devious where you would cook something that would be horrendous and make Thor taste it, sometimes it backfires on you and you would put together a really delicious meal, other times it becomes successful and you would see Thor’s nice exterior crumble a little bit before nicely saying it tastes good.

“How is it?”

“It’s something...” Thor says before smiling with food in his mouth, “It’s really good, (Y/n)!”

“Thanks!” Turning your back to giggle to yourself as Thor spits it in a napkin, only to give you a thumbs up when you turn back to look at him.

Clint and Natasha were different, they were constantly busy with work that they barely got to know you until they got stuck babysitting you. You had loudly got on the wrong side of Fury causing him to ground you and the two spies to look after you. It was their punishment went a mission almost went wrong.

You were pissy with them, like any other teenager going through teenage angst. You got on both the spies’ nerves, until one day you sat down and it seems like you calm down, you were easy for Clint and Natasha to handle until you heard swears and shouting coming from Nick’s office. You grin to yourself as you grabbed both the wrist of each spy and bucked it out of the room you were occupying.

Turns out, in your protest of being grounded, you decided to prank Nick. And because you couldn’t alone at the SHIELD base, you dragged both spies around with you. It got to the point that the spies were showing you hiding spaces and even helping you prank their superior.

At the end of the day, when Nick finds you in the room, he asked what you’ve been doing. You show him that you’ve been doing homework and drawing for Steve. Fury can’t prove you wrong as the two spies back you up.

“He hasn’t done anything wrong, Boss,” Clint says, forcing his mischievous smile to be concealed.

“It’s been a brat, but he’s been doing what we’ve told him to do,” Natasha backs it up.

You looked at him angelic like, “I’ve been good today.”

Nick looked annoyed, “Sure you have.”

So, as the years continued, more people joining the team, no one has gotten close to than the original six of seven members of the team. You’ve made friends with Vision, Sam, Bucky, Wanda, Peter, Rhodey, but no one got as close to you as the six of them did.

So, here you stood with a party hat on your head, smiling to your family. You were living in the new Avengers’ base, it wasn’t the tower anymore, but it’s better to have somewhere to live. There are banners hanging about, saying happy birthday. Confetti and balloons sprawled on the floor, the lights are dimmed down and strobe lights flashing.

There’s a pile of presents, one that contains official adoption papers. Tony is holding the cake, it’s lit up with candles, the team is standing around or behind Tony, facing the celebrant, the kid who was heart and soul of the team.

“Happy Birthday (Y/n)!” They exclaimed.

You’re now eighteen, it’s been four years with the team, nothing can ruin your family, nothing can go any better than his. You’re happy, so they’re happy too.

“Make a wish!”

And so you did.

#Avengers #avengers imagine #avengers x male reader #x male reader #t #tony stark x male!reader #steve rogers x male!reader #Thor odinson x male!reader #bruce banner x male!reader #natasha romanoff x male!reader #clint barton x male!reader #platonic

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sapphicknightaesthetic · 3 years

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Prompt #2: The winds call me back to you

Ireland had proved to be more than Eivor had bargained for. She sailed home on the wind-tossed sea, wondering if the trade routes, outposts, and alliances she forged would prove to be worth it in the end, compared to their exorbitantly high cost. She remembered Barid’s eyes, soft but desperate, pleading with her to ensure King Flann’s allegiance with his last breath, paired with an intensity of his love for his son. He had built a thriving city all so that Sichfrith could prosper...

“...Valhalla need not be a place, Eivor. It can be a legacy…”

She thought about her own legacy. Her intention had always been a life dedicated to fighting for honor, for the glory of her people, for some measure of peace where she no longer needed to pick up her axe to defend them at every turn. But is that what England had given her? She had spent much of her energy and immense skills at the whims of others with political aims and goals, not always aligning with her own. She had placed more than one puppet king on a throne, often needing to choose between the better of two evils. Was this honor? Was this a legacy worthy of entrance to Valhalla?

Eivor felt exhaustion roll through her like the tide, filling every crevice. She felt unsure of her place in the world, and just needed the comfort of home. Of Randvi. That was her raison d'être, as Estrid would say. Her reason for being. If she fought for the betterment of her clan, if she made connections and alliances to ensure their safety, that was all that mattered. She shook the sad cobwebs from her mind, determined to have a genuine smile for her wife when she returned. She leaned against the firm wall of the longship, and fell into an uneasy sleep.

Birna shook her shoulder. “Come on Sunbeam. Home time.”

Eivor’s eyes fluttered open, she blinked sleep back to its void. “Have we docked?”

“Not yet. We’re just around the bend.”

“Thanks for waking me, Birna.”

“I’m so glad to be rid of Ireland! Those Druids were something else, eh? Giving decent Pagans a bad name.”

“Mmmm.”

“Eivor, I don’t mean to pry. But you spent a lot of time with that red haired witch...what’s her name…”

“Ciara. I did. What’s your question, Birna?”

“I’m just wondering if you made any Druid magic of your own in that wet bog of a land?”

Eivor rolled her eyes. Birna knew full well she hadn’t, though this question seemed to pop up after every major journey they undertook. Eivor had tried to tell her multiple times that she would never be unfaithful to Randvi, that she could not bed anyone for the sake of it if her heart wasn’t in it. The concept had been lost on Birna, and so the questions had persisted.

“You know I didn’t.”

“I’m just checking. You do have a type, Sunbeam. That red hair burns like fire.”

Eivor grinned ruefully, shook her head, and turned to look at their surroundings. They were just passing the trined point in the river that led to Grantebridge, the ruins of Duroliponte looming to the Southeast. One more bend and they’d be home. She wondered if Randvi would be there waiting; she had sent Sýnin ahead with a note. The evening was well on its way, Randvi might even be asleep. She pictured their bed, warm and soft, furs piled on top of them as they snuggled together, limbs entwined. More and more, this was what she wanted. The return home was always worth it, and was always something she looked forward to, but lately she no longer wanted to return, she only wanted the simple everyday fact of her and Randvi together, because she had never left in the first place.

She watched, wistfully, as the crew lowered the sails and started rowing, this part of the river too narrow to traverse safely. Her heart rate increased as the Raider’s hut roof became visible, growing closer with each stroke of the oars. She felt a swell of pride as more of her village emerged from the lowland fog. Her village . She had built this place from almost nothing, discarded hovels of canvas and sticks. Sigurd may have claimed it as theirs, but Eivor had been the one to turn it into something to be proud of, something worth protecting. She leapt to the back of the ship’s tail, standing on a ledge. “...Valhalla need not be a place, Eivor. It can be a legacy…” This was her Valhalla, and it would never be complete without the person at it’s centre, at its heart.

Eivor realized then that while she was proud of Ravensthorpe, Ravensthorpe, much like her former idea of Valhalla, was only a place. Randvi was her true home. She’d go wherever Randvi was, without question. Their love, with all of its storied history of waiting, longing, and hiding, was her legacy. She saw copper hair, cloaked against the oncoming chill of the evening, waiting like a beacon between the posts of the village entrance.

The ship glided silently up to the dock, and Eivor immediately leapt off, running as fast as her exhausted legs would carry her. She grabbed Randvi, lifting her off the ground in a tight embrace, spinning her around. She inhaled Randvi’s scent, spice and fire blending with earth and ink and smoke. Her heart beat Randvi’s name in fast repetition, her hands holding onto her wife as tightly as she dared without hurting her.

“My love,” Randvi whispered, as she held fast to Eivor. “How I’ve missed you.” Her hands caressed the back of Eivor’s newly shaved head, luxuriating in the velvety feel.

Eivor couldn’t speak, she did not want to break the moment with words, but slowly set Randvi down, quickly finding her mouth and communicating everything she couldn’t say with a long, slow kiss, paying attention to the feel of Randvi’s lips, the warmth of her mouth, the teasing nature of her teeth.

Claps and pats of hands landed on her back and shoulders from the crew as they walked past the pair. Their hearts never failed to be happy for their Jarl, for the love that she had found and fought for. For all of her sacrifice, for the enormous work she had devoted to make their lives better, they gladdened at the sight of Eivor and Randvi together. They knew how hard her road had been, how much she had suffered, often silently, from such a young age. Her happiness was their happiness, and they showed her whenever they could. Birna let out a whistle.

“You better get her to bed, Jarlskona.” Birna wrapped an arm around Petra, who had walked down to meet her wife when she saw the familiar Raven sails from her hut.

“Leave them be, love. I’d better get you to bed.” Petra wrapped an arm around Birna’s waist.

“You’ll hear no complaints from me, Petra. Good night, Sunbeam!”

Eivor and Randvi watched them leave, as Eivor sent them off with a wave. Randvi turned back around, seeing the edges of something in Eivor’s face. “What’s wrong, darling? Are you hurt?”

“I’m fine. I have a few cuts and bruises, nothing to worry about, my heart.”

“Thank you for sending Sýnin. I have a bath prepared. And some roast boar, thanks to Petra.”

Eivor felt overcome at the thoughtful care Randvi showed her in all things. “Randvi...thank you.” Was all she could manage.

Randvi smiled at her, her wife was always so ready to display gratitude, a custom she never tired of, but she furrowed her eyes, wondering what was troubling her usually contented drengr.

“Let’s get you home.”

Randvi and Eivor sat in deliciously scented hot water. The worry and tension Eivor had carried home with her evaporated into the steam drifting to the longhouse ceiling. A satisfied smile now constantly fixed on her face.

“This was a great idea, possibly the best you’ve ever had. And that’s truly saying something.”

“I aim to please, my Jarl.” Randvi felt self-congratulatory at the obvious change in her love’s mood. Years of observing Eivor, of seeing her come home in different states of health and happiness, of finding different ways of tending to that glorious body and soul made Randvi an expert in the proper care and maintenance of her physically ferocious wife. But one truth prevailed among her experience: Eivor always recooperated faster with a bath.

“Are you ready to talk about Ireland?”

Eivor exhaled. “I will do my best. It still feels...fresh.”

Randvi sat up in the bath, giving Eivor all of her attention.

“You know I went to Ireland to help my cousin, Barid. And I did help, although Barid fell in battle. His High King did not heed Barid’s warnings. We were able to beat the Druids back, but I have been wondering if his death was needless, no matter how good and glorious his end. He died a hero, and is no doubt in Valhalla, but had his words been listened to, he would still be the King of Dublin, and his son would still have his father.”

“It is not up to us to change fate, Eivor. It sounds like the Nornir gave Barid a good death. What else can we ask in this life?”

“The love of the most beautiful and intelligent of women, for a start, at the very least.”

Randvi rolled her eyes and laughed, pleasure and embarrassment mingled together. When she looked back at Eivor, sorrow still crept in the periphery. “Is that all that troubles you, Eivor?”

“The Druids of Ireland are much like us, trying to carve out a life for themselves, trying to hold onto their traditions and culture, though the Christians would willingly wipe them, and us, away if given the chance. There was an extremist faction, the Children of Danu, that were causing all the strife while other Druids were forced to live in fear and even secrecy. It made me wonder if we will ever truly pacify this land. The Christians make no room for anyone else. I…I had to kill a Druid priestess who I thought was my friend, all for a Christian King who would rule over all. Was that honorable? I feel...stained, Randvi. I wonder if the decisions I’ve made in my time here are hurting our people, rather than truly helping. She was misguided, angry, she caused a lot of pain in the land there. I think King Flann Sinna saw the error of his ways in his treatment of the Druids, and he will make amends - he said as much. But these Christians...they can be false as well as unyielding. I’m not sure how far he can be trusted.”

Memories of Fulke and King Aelfred made her skin prick involuntarily. The Norse and Danes were often met with a great deal more than suspicion and hostility, labeled as barbarians and savages for their voracity in war. But there was something honest and forthright in them as a people; they hid nothing, they lived openly and celebrated the customs and cultures of all who chose to live among them. Sharing resources through a community was their way, regardless of the people that community comprised; yet this was not the way of the Christians. From what she had seen, they feared all outsiders. She was unsure if this was unique to Anglo-Saxon Christians or not, but from all she had experienced, she was not keen to go looking for other examples.

Randvi found Eivor’s hand under the warm water, and stroked soothingly. Her love never lost sight of the broader view and what it meant for her people. It was one of the many things she adored and cherished about her. She took Eivor’s fingers and brought them to her lips, kissing them lightly.

“These are large questions, my love. Too large to confront in one night. But I promise I will help you as much as I can in our time come in this land. You try to take care of so many, Eivor Varinsdottir. I fear the world is too big, even for your very broad shoulders.”

Eivor felt her heart flutter. After all these years, after all this time, being with Randvi made her feel like she was falling in love with her over and over again. She never stopped falling.

“But maybe, just for tonight, you can let me take care of you?” Randvi leaned forward, kissing one cheek lightly, then the other cheek, her nose, her chin, across her forehead, until she found Eivor’s lips, nipping lightly, until Eivor pulled her forward and kissed her with earnest desire. She opened her body, as Randvi lay on top of her in the bath, relishing the closeness after too many months apart.

Eivor leaned her head back slightly, looking into Randvi’s eyes, darkened to forest green between her desire and the dim candlelight around them.

“Barid said something to me, before the Valkyrie came to claim him. He told me that Valhalla need not be a place, that it can be a legacy.” Eivor held Randvi’s gaze, needing her to feel how much she meant what she was about to say. “I think perhaps for me, it is not so much a legacy, as it’s you, Randvi. You are my home, my Valhalla. After all of our time in England, all of the campaigns, the politicking, the alliances we have paid for with sweat and blood, we could walk away tomorrow and I would not care. The winds always call me back to you, wherever you are.”

Randvi felt strangely vulnerable, though deeply moved. She felt her heart race to echo and return Eivor’s sentiment. If Eivor ever left Ravensthorpe, Randvi would follow without hesitation. She used the moment to lean down and kiss Eivor again, with unashamed love and lust and pride and longing and hope. Their lives together had not been easy, but it had been worth every moment they had paid.

She felt Eivor’s hands slide down to her lower back, holding her closely. She felt a hot rush in her center, and decided it was time to leave the bath.

“Shall we adjourn to our chambers, my Jarl?”

Eivor smirked, knowingly. “Indeed, my Jarlskona.”

Randvi made her way out of the bath, as Eivor followed suit. Randvi spied some new blade slices over Eivor’s body, and some fresh bruises getting ready to bloom; she’d be sure to kiss them all later. She took Eivor’s hand and led them naked to their bed. Their bed . A place she was never tired of acknowledging.

Eivor pulled Randvi to her, wrapping her in strong, solid muscle. “I missed you, Jarlskona.”

“And I you, my Jarl.” Randvi pressed her teeth against Eivor’s neck, nipping and sucking her way along the tender flesh under her chin. She heard Eivor’s breath catch, and a gasp after she released skin from her teeth. She moved a hand, cupping Eivor’s sex, feeling the wet traces of her want on her fingers. Eivor bowed her head resting it on Randvi’s shoulder, her breathing deepening with anticipation. This fierce drengr, terror of England and Ireland, great Jarl of a proud clan, was made vulnerable and soft with a single touch. It was a power Randvi knew only she wielded, and she never took it for granted.

She brought Eivor to the bed, guiding her down. “What would you like, darling?” She purred in a way that drove Eivor wild.

“You. I just want you.”

“I am yours, Eivor.”

And the sound of those words, said by the only woman in the world she needed to hear them from, snapped Eivor out of the worry she brought home with her. As the sounds of their love-making filled the longhouse, Ravensthorpe sighed relief, and for tonight at least, everything was well in the world.

#eivor x randvi #eivor randvi #lady eivor #lady knights #women in armor #my writing #randivorprideweek #randivorprideweek2021

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