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marigolddove · 1 year

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Love Begins With Murder, Believe it or Not.

Part 3

Request by: @yandere-dark-cupid

I stayed up until 3 am writing this, passed out and then woke up at 6 am to finish it lol. It's okay though I'm not tired, I'm just happy to be writing. I hope you all enjoy this part there will definitely be another part which will probably be the final for a while. I'll probably try and leave this story with a not-so-official ending because I might make one-shots based around this in the future.

Also I'm getting a new job soon so that might cut into my writing a bit but I'm going to keep writing no matter what I'm so grateful for Welcome Home and all it's characters and all my fellow fanfic writers and artists out there making more and more content for this fandom. You guys are all awesome and Welcome Home is officially my comfort Fandom, without it I might've never wrote anything ever again. So thank you to @partycoffin, and all of the AU creators, you're all truly wonderful people.

Warnings: Cussing, mentions of torture and violence, anger issues.

@elegantkidfansoul, @sunkyss, @all-things-fandomstuck, @sailorsimp13, @cricketsjunk

💀♥️💀

Wally couldn't believe he didn't have one single vase in his apartment, not one! He had been so certain he'd had flowers before, surely he'd had…he was a lover of beauty and nature, so it was extremely frustrating when he couldn't find his—imaginary—vase.

He could've let it go there, just put the bouquet in a tall glass or leave them out to dry and get a vase tomorrow, but to be honest he was procrastinating when he suddenly decided he needed a vase before his nap; he knew of a flower shop fifteen minutes away on a strip he was well familiar with—he often got lunch or dinner from a nextdoor diner, well he did before he hit this depression.

That's what all this is about, after all. Depression.

He lost the desire, the drive, to style his hair, paint, draw, talk to his friends and employees, he doesn't even make eye-contact like he used to; and now to top it all off, he realizes, there's absolutely no life in his apartment. Even his old paintings feel soulless, hollow, because they don't fill him with the emotions he once held as he crafted them.

When the depression set in, he couldn't be sure, it had been a gradual change; but it was one he hadn't noticed until now, he hadn't wanted to think about it.

He feels his face flush in embarrassment as he thinks of his neglect of himself and his home as he drives to the shop, the sky turning orange and blue behind the many buildings surrounding him.

As he kept his eyes trained on the still bustling road ahead, he could only hope he would make it in time so this uncoordinated trip wouldn't be a complete waste.

—————————

With traffic being convinently merciful to him this early in the evening time, he is soon racing to the shops entrance door, bouquet delicately cradled by his left arm; completely missing the 'open' sign flipping to 'closed' as his unoccupied hand grasps the door handle and turns.

As he pushes into the building he is shocked to find an employee standing right at the entrance, hand quickly retracting from the door as they lock eyes with him, seemingly just as shocked by his sudden entrance.

The bell above the door chimes.

For Mr. Darling, renowned local kingpin, ruthless 'family' man, time seemed to slow for a moment, just a moment. It was almost as if the chiming of the bell had put him into a trance, or maybe it was just you.

There you stand, (h/c) hair fluttering from the sudden rush of wind that came from him opening the door, staring right at him; your work uniform fitting you quite nicely, especially with your own accessories that added a unique personal touch, not to mention the smell—which was most definitely the shop, but there is no doubt in his mind that you smell any different—sweet and floral.

You're the first to speak, voice a bit nervous at his stare, "O-Oh! Hello, we–ah, I, was just about to close up shop." You move the hand that had been reaching for the door handle to fiddle with a ring on your opposite pinky finger, a sign of anxiety.

Realizing how he must look, a bit wild from the wind whipping his already disheveled hair around with tired eyes, his ears and cheeks grew a little hot, but he clears his throat into his hand as he tries to recover from his sudden and silly attraction.

"I apologize, I didn't mean to just barge in here, but…" he shrugs the arm cradling the bouquet, "I'm looking for a vase, this shop was the only place I could think to find one and it wasn't a far drive…I thought I had a vase, but I was wrong." He explains ratherly lamely, his usual suave and calm demeanor shattered by his growing embarrassment at his current mental and physical state. This was a mistake, he should've just waited for the morning or let the flowers dry out, he should be sleeping right now.

Like an angel you smile at him, so bright and warm it almost feels like the sun is beaming at him, "That's alright! I don't mind a bit, sir, follow me I have some you can choose from in the back." You move to allow him full access and then make your way to what looks to be a storage closet at the back of the shop.

He follows without a word, eyes glued to your figure as you seem to glide to the back, your feet making little to no noise as you move.

The door to the storage closet is open with chalk board sign leaning against the wall next to the door frame, 'small vase $10, medium $15, large $25 ALL HAND MADE!!'.

"You make your own vases?" Wally asks, impressed even before seeing the quality of your work.

You flush as you glance at the sign and then gesture to the closet, signaling him to take a look at your stock, "Yeah, it's a new thing I started doing…I've always been into crafts and stuff like that and working with clay seemed really fun and challenging, so…." He notices your words grow softer, seemingly embarrassed.

Well he can certainly tell you're a beginner, many of the pieces seem a bit lop sided or misshapen, but some are charming due to their faults. Something art had taught him early on is to love imperfections just as much as perfections.

"They're charming." He says, and it's the truth, hearing the honesty in his tone makes you turn a bit more red as you smile gratefully at him.

"Which would you recommend for this bouquet?" He asks, he already has an idea of which vase he'd pick but he wants to hear your opinion.

You eyeball the bouquet, a knowing look sparkling in your (e/c) eyes, and look to the assortment of pottery, "hmm".

Your eyes land on a particularly unique piece on the bottom shelf, it's wide and a bit overly round at the bottom and it narrows a bit more dramatically than you intended at the top, it was also colorful, painted with vertical rainbow stripes that had come out very pastel when you had originally wanted a very bold rainbow color. Overall it had been a bit of a flop, but at the same time it has become one of your favorite pieces and it was a tragedy it had never been used. Whether it looked good with this particular bouquet didn't really matter, to be honest it didn't compliment the bouquet at all, but it deserves a home.

Following your gaze, Wally examines the piece you're staring at so intensely.

"Is that the one?" It certainly wasn't the one he was going to pick, but the way you stared at it with such sentiment made his heart leap. Oh how he missed the days when he would look at his own art with such a nostalgic and sentimental gaze.

"I don't know…it's a little ugly, to be honest…it doesn't really go with the flowers."

"I can always get more flowers." He responds smoothly, catching even himself off guard.

The two of you lock eyes again and he wishes he had examined himself before coming here, so he could know how you see him. He's certain he looks like a mess, and not a hot one.

You seem taken back by his response, but recover quickly to smile, "Yeah, I guess you can. This is a flower shop after all." You glance down at his bouquet again, "you wouldn't happen to know someone named Julie, would you?"

He knew you would recognize the tag and the flower combination, so your question didn't phase him, "Yes, actually. I'm sorry I couldn't come in for the flowers myself, at the time I was…busy."

"Ah, no need to apologize, worrying about a funeral is tough even when you weren't close to the person who died. I'm sorry for being a bit nosey."

"I don't think you're being nosey at all," he ignores the bit about the funeral, not wanting to really lie, but still omitting the truth, "these flowers you picked are really very lovely, I almost want to keep them for myself." He absolutely intends on keeping them for himself.

Your smile turns a bit bashful, "Oh, well thank you. It's nice to know I got it right." Turning back to the shelves of pottery, you crouch to the one you had been staring at, "So is this the one you'd like? Or did you have your eye on another?"

"I'll take that one and these two as well." He gestures his free hand to two other pieces, one being a bit plain and lumpy, the other a bit more colorful; the base color being yellow with red and blue swirls.

"Three?" You ask, a bit surprised.

He grins at you, and unknown to him your heart flutters, "This way I have an excuse to come back, I'm going to need flowers for them, right?" It's been a while since he's tried flirting, but by the way your entire face seems to light up and flush he's certain it's been effective.

"R-Right," you grab two of the vases as he grabs one, "that's three medium sized pots so it'll be $45 dollars." The two of you make your way to the check out counter and place the three pots delicately, "I'll go ahead and wrap these for you." As he grabs the money out of his wallet, you rummage through the work table and pull out a bundle of plain wrapping paper. Carefully, you wrap each individual piece in a thick protective layer of paper, then delicately place the three into an oversized grocery bag, adding more wads of paper between each piece.

Wally lays the money down onto the counter, slipping an extra $5 bill as a tip, as you place the finishing touches on the bag of fragiles. When you're pleased with your work, you hand him the bag with a wide grin, collecting the cash; before you can finish counting Wally tips his head to you.

"You have a good night, doll, stay safe." Without another word he exits the shop, you call after him about his change but he doesn't respond. Upon examining the extra $5 bill closer you notice a series of numbers written on it, when had he done that?

It doesn't take a genius to know that he's written a cell phone number on the bill, despite his somewhat messy appearance your stomach feels as though it's infested with butterflies at the idea that he might have been interested in you. He certainly had flirted with you a little bit, but that didn't have to mean anything, but leaving his number? That means something.

He did say he would need to come back for more flowers, you smile at the thought, carefully folding the bill and tucking it into your pants pocket. You begin to close shop again, this time with no interruptions.

—————————

Julie should've told him he looked this awful, he thought to himself as he examined his reflection in the rear view mirror. No, no, no this won't do! Horror pierced it's way into his heart as he also realized that this is how he had looked during your entire interaction. He had flirted like this…left his number looking like this.

A part of him wanted to storm back into the shop and explain that this isn't him, just something he's been dealing with, tell you that he's not some pathetic, greasy nobody like he knew you must've thought he was.

He's Wally fucking Darling, he kills whoever he wants, whenever he wants, sells what he deems profitable no matter how morally gray and takes whatever he pleases. The people that surround him know to not only fear him but to adore him.

In his sudden shock and growing fury he almost, nearly, throws the bag of pottery to the floor of his passenger side; but he doesn't, of course, he's much too collected to just fly off the handle and break things—he most certainly is not, just two weeks before he broke that not-so imaginary vase he knew he had, it had been in a fit of frustration towards Howdy for failing a trade agreement; Wally didn't remember it now, but that day he had taken his only vase and chucked it at Howdy's much higher head. He had missed entirely, and now he's forgotten the whole ordeal.

Thankfully there's even less traffic, somehow, on the way back, which keeps his temper low but bubbling gently to the surface. A rolling boil was sure to start.

When he arrived back to his apartment, he placed the pots onto his sofa along with the bouquet, so delicate compared to the war of emotions he held inside.

Remember: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6—

He enters his massive, stunning bathroom and makes a b-line for the mirrors, he needs a better look at the damage his neglect has done.

If looks could kill one look would make the mirrors shatter, this isn't who he is. He feels like an imposter in his own body when he looks at himself, hair greasy and wild—no longer slicked back due to the wind, he doesn't even like slicking back his hair, it isn't his style! Then there's the grotesque bags under his eyes, when had they become so dark and puffy? How hadn't he noticed sooner? The rage was building now.

7, 8, 9—

Why was his skin so dull an–and sallow?!

Suddenly the sound of his marble counter top cracking triggers a roar of emotion to overwhelm him, he doesn't even register he's injured himself by slamming a fist down onto the marble. The emotions are so raw, so heavy, he doesn't even realize he's out of the bathroom now; doesn't hear the carnage he's creating or his own howls and shouts of incoherent anger and frustration.

When and how did he become so pathetic? How long had the others just sat idly by watching him grow weaker and uglier. His anger blinds him to the memories of when they had tried, all of them had; even Howdy, who wasn't the biggest fan of Wally to begin with, had tried.

The shrill ringing of his telephone snaps him back to reality, in his now bloodied and bruising hands he grips a broken frame that holds–held one of his own designs. His breathing is heavy and his head is swimming, wasn't he just in the bathroom a moment ago?

He drops the frame and stumbles to the phone, wincing at the loudness of it, he doesn't even take a moment to collect himself before answering.

"What do you wa–"

"Hello!" Your soft, sweet voice timidly interrupts his rude greeting.

Suddenly his stomach dips and his heart flips, he really hopes you hadn't heard him.

"Uh-uhm, it seems like I've caught you at a bad time, ha ha. I'm sorry about that, sir." You had heard his sour attitude, fuck.

"No, no," he corrects hastily, not wanting you to hang up, "I'm sorry, I just…I just injured myself getting to the phone." The lie feels bitter, like bile rising in his throat, fuck why did he lie?

"Oh," is your meek response, then a pause, "Well…I'm sorry for calling you so soon…and it's a bit late too, ah, this is so silly I'm really sorry."

He's about to reassure you he doesn't mind in the slightest, and it's the truth, but you continue quickly.

"It's just that I didn't ever give you my name, a-and I never got yours. Also I wanted to give you my number as well, that way I don't have to do all the calling myself, you see." Your stuttering is cute, but your sickeningly sweet reason for calling him has him swooning most of all.

"I see, well," he straightens himself, confidence filling him once more, "My name is Wally, Wally Darling, and you are..?"

"Y/N, Y/N L/N."

"That's a lovely name for such an enchanting flower like yourself, Y/N." He purrs, his turmoil and self-esteem issues quickly forgotten by this new cocktail of emotions, suddenly he's like a giddy teenage boy; twirling the phone cord between his fingers, a toothy smirk growing on his face and he imagines you blushing like you did in the shop.

"Your name is really cute too," you reply, you sound embarrassed but you're definitely smiling.

"Thank you," he grabs the note pad and pen he keeps by his landline, "Now then, what's your number?"

"O-Oh, right!" You quickly tell him your number and he repeats it back to you, once he's gotten it correct he smiles, gently placing his pen back down onto the table.

Sighing, "I must say, I'm glad you called." He admits.

"Oh?"

He hums, "Yes, when I got to my car I realized how I must have appeared to you. I typically take better care of myself, but, well, recently I've 'let myself go'." His tone remains light, almost dreamy as he speaks to you, even though on the inside he can feel the suffocating emotions from before bubbling up again.

"I just thought you were having an off day, you're actually very handsome." The way you say it, like its a fact he should already know, makes his face warm. Those emotions dying quickly before they can rise again, for a complete stranger you seem to have a powerful hold over him, you're able to make him feel nervous and excited.

It's pleasant.

"Well," you start, "It's getting late, I'm sure we both have things to do before nighttime."

He glances at the mess he made during his episode, as much as he wanted to disagree he knew he needed to clean up. He wouldn't live in this embarrassment any longer.

"Yes, thank you again for calling me, Y/N. I hope you have a good night."

"You too."

"Stay safe." He hears the receiver cut off on your end, he sighs into the now quiet and lonely air. He's grateful for your ability to distract him, he would've caused more damage to not only his home but to himself had you not called.

Wally looks around at the carnage he caused, grateful he didn't damage his newly aquired pottery and flowers. It's time to fix this.

—————————

When Barnaby returns to the building he's immediately greeted by Frank, with a disgruntled Eddie in tow. He had taken a bit longer than he would've liked with the rat, but the boss told him to really work on the guy, and he wanted to be sure the body couldn't be found and linked back to them. He's very thorough.

So he's a bit tired when he's approached by Frank, their face intense.

"Something's wrong with Wally."

Immediately dread fills Barnaby, worried something happened while he was gone, "What happened?"

"We heard him screaming and loud noises, like things being broken, upstairs."

"And neither of you thought to check on him?!" He barks, immediately heading for the elevator.

"It wasn't like the sound of struggling, I know what a struggle sounds like. He's probably just having a fit, like usual now-a-days, and I don't want myself or Frank to be caught in the cross fire." Eddie replies, his tone indifferent.

Frank sighs, following close behind Barnaby, "I wanted to go up and see him, but after what happened with Howdy–"

"I know." Barnaby cuts him off. A vase hadn't been the only thing Wally had thrown at Howdy the last time he became like this, and the vase hadn't landed anyway; but a paper weight had, and so did his punches. Despite not liking him, Howdy had stood there and taken it, claiming the boss "needed that more than anyone knew".

Barnaby wishes it had been him, not Howdy. He didn't want Wally to hurt him, but he's his best friend and he wants to be the one that's there for him at his absolute lowest, as well as his highest. It feels like recently he's missing all of the moments that are crucial for helping his first friend.

"Thank you for letting me know, I'll go see him alone now. You two get back to…whatever you were doing, have a good night." Frank looks like they're about to respond but the elevator doors close, effectively cutting them off.

Barnaby sighs into the silence of the elevator, readying himself for what's to come when he reaches Wally's penthouse.

He's surprised when he arrives and the room is filled with gentle music coming from the Gramophone—the record player—across the spacious living area; someone's singing in the bathroom, he soon realizes it's Wally singing and he's even more stunned. Wally hasn't sung a song in all the time he's known him, claiming he couldn't carry a tune.

To Barnaby, he sounds like a professional, smooth and suave. It almost feels like he's intruding, but the mess of the room makes him stay. Wally seems to have started cleaning up his mess, which is a nice change of pace. Typically Julie would come in and clean for him after hearing he'd had an episode, saying he deserves a clean safe space, even if he's the one trashing the place.

Barnaby moves to relax on the sofa, careful to avoid the bag Wally had left. He sits and waits a while, enjoying the soft melody and the surprisingly relaxing aura that the chaotic room held. He finds himself humming along with Wally, not knowing the words of his song.

When he hears his friend's singing end and the water shut off his posture straightens and becomes a little tense; worried how his little buddy might react at his sudden intrusion.

To his surprise, Wally exits the bathroom in a plush bathrobe, hair expertly wrapped in a towel atop his head as he continues humming a tune; and when he catches sight of Barnaby he's shocked but smiles.

"Ah, you're back. I did wonder if you would come and see me again today, I'm glad you're back safe." He moves closer to the sofa, bare feet padding against the hard wood floors, "Sorry for the mess, I got a bit carried away again today. I'm also sorry if I've been short with you today."

"There's no need to apologize, Boss. I'm just glad you're looking better."

"I do look better don't I? It's amazing what a shower and a quick skin care routine can do to a man." He says as he rummages through the grocery bag on the couch, pulling out three bulky items wrapped in paper.

He sits next to Barnaby and unwraps them, the record now fading into a new melody. Wally places three…interesting vases on the low table in front of them. His smile seems brighter as he looks at them.

"You starting a collection?" Barnaby jokes.

Wally hums, "I'm considering it."

"I told Julie to buy flowers for the…rat's lady friend, I intended on sending her a message with them, only to find out she herself is a rat. So I decided I'd keep the flowers for myself, they're quite pretty." He explained, his voice soft.

"But what's with the pottery?"

Wally laughs, "Well pretty flowers need equally pretty vases, my friend." Barnaby wasn't sure he would call them pretty, but he wasn't an artist so what would he know?

"Why'd ya get three though?"

"You're awfully inquisitive today, aren't you?" For a moment Barnaby worries he's stepped too far, but Wally's tone sounds mostly teasing and light hearted, "I bought three because I couldn't just pick one that I liked; besides, my home could use more art."

"Yeah, sure. It's just nice to see you smiling and, uh, getting out there." He admits awkwardly, his smaller friend looking up at him with a wide grin, it seems genuine compared to his usual facade.

"It has been nice, today hasn't been perfect, but it's been nice." Wally rises from the sofa, grabbing the plain, lumpy vase and the bouquet as he moves to the kitchen.

Carefully, he fills the vase with the recommended amount of water and retrieves a bit of lemon juice he's had sitting in his fridge for a month now—it's been longer than a month, he just doesn't know that—he adds a few drops to the tap water before arranging the flowers inside the vase.

He carries the vase filled with flowers back to Barnaby and places them at the center of the low table, adjusting it's position on the table until he deems it perfect.

Wally sighs as he relaxes back onto the couch next to his much larger friend, "Now all I need is more flowers to fill the other two, perhaps I'll make paintings of them as well, they're inspiring me already." He didn't say what else might be inspiring him, but in his mind an image of you formed. Maybe he would sketch you as well.

Barnaby raised a brow at him, even though he wouldn't see it, and smiled, "Hey, I'm glad you're wanting to paint again little buddy, after what happened earlier I thought you might be giving up for good."

Mentioning their time together earlier that day seemed to sour Wally's mood a bit, "Yeah, well, torture and death aren't always the best motivation I've realized."

At his sudden tone change, Barnaby scrambles to get him back to his pleasant mood, "So where'd ya get the pottery? Any place I might know?"

This seems to work as a twinkle appears in his eyes once again and he turns to fully face Barnaby, a soft and genuine smile gracing his features.

"You might, Eddie talks about it all the time it would seem, everyone knew about it but me, ha ha." He continued, "Well, actually, I knew of the flower shop but I had never gone in before, until today. You might know it, it's (S/N), over on 9th Street."

Barnaby contemplates the location a moment, he can't say that he does recall a flower shop there, "It's not ringing any bells, but whats so special about it, you seem very…happy and I'm not so sure it's about a flower shop."

Wally's eyes widen and pink dusts across his cheeks, something Barnaby isn't sure he's ever seen happen to his friend before, "Well, I suppose it's about more than a shop, yes," then he stubbornly adds, "Although the flowers do make me happy."

Barnaby motions for him to continue, Wally sighs and while it sounds like frustration he still has a grin on his face.

That's when Barnaby learns about you, although he's certain he might have heard of you before through Eddie Dear, but he knows Eddie never talked about you so dreamily.

This is also when Barnaby learns that his best friend might have experienced love at first sight.

#welcome home #wally darling #wally darling x reader #eddie x frank #Mafia! AU #mafia!Wally Darling #wally has some personal issues #this is gonna be cheesy #its love at first sight #deal with it #barnaby beagle

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simtrovart · 2 months

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hiii i know it’s been a long time since u last posted and u prob haven’t even been logged in on here in forever either but i just caught up on ur story (it’s been yearsssss since i’ve been on tumblr lol and this was a good way for me to procrastinate today) and WOW when i tell u i have tears streaming down my face rn. ur story is so beautiful and dreamlike almost. the pictures u post are actually stunning? how do u do it? also ur poses work hand in hand with your writing and story and AH everything!! i love it so much oh my god thank you for creating this, even if u won’t end up finishing it i’m happy because i got to enjoy the experience. ps. u could totally be a famous author goddamn ur writing is incredible

Hello,

I will use this message from my inbox to relate what happened in the past few years, lol. It's been more than 4 years and I am not sure if my known simblrs are still around, but sending you lots of love for those who stayed and for those who are new and simsing. ♡

Well, first of all, I would like to thank you for taking your time and scroll through the Ilkay's story (through my hiatus when I had time and missed sims I was reading it from the beginning and I was overwhelmed myself with what I was capable to do with sims) and also thank you for your beautiful message. ♡

Secondly and unfortunately, I lost the entire sims save with the Ilkay's :(.. and also my Tumblr access, but now thanks to the Tumblr team I regained access to it.

I had a few questions in my inbox in regards of some old poses I made. I am not sure if I will start doing poses and re-doing what I had posted or stories on this account at the moment as I have some personal things to do that require time.

I will be around though spreading the love. Maybe even I will have the patience and time to start from the beginning, who knows?!

#simtrovartask #have a nice day/night ❤

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fluffy-ami · 7 months

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Profile Tag Game🌱

Hello - “Ah, hi there! You can call me Ami, but I actually use a lot of different names when talking to people on the internet. Thanks to @lovelynim for tagging me, this tag game is actually really fun~✨”

Chat: Tickling - “Um, uh... Well, it's a very... strange interest of mine? It has been with me since I was a little kid, and I still have no idea how exactly all of this had started. This little thing is really fun and cute, but the fact that I like it so much is embarrassing as hell for me”.

When It Rains - “I like staying at home when it rains, makes me want to get all cozy in my bed and just do nothing. I also usually get very sleepy, and it may prevent me from studying properly”.

When the Sun Is Out - “Huh. A rare sight at this time of year. I missed it”.

When It Snows - “Snow? I mean, it's cool, yeah. For the first few weeks, at least. After a while your eyes will probably start hurting a little though, because, well, too much white everywhere”.

Good Morning - “Five more minutes...”

Good Night - “Oh hell nah, I'm not going to bed. What do you mean it's 3am? I don't care, I'm still not done with my silly doodles, now go back to sleep, buddy”.

Chat: Sensitivity - “Hm? Am I ti-? Ahem. Well, not really. In reality, I'm not sure. But what I do know for sure is that I'm not that sensitive in some of those 'most popular' spots, perhaps certain techniques are required to get me to crack. No-one had ever gotten to try though, my irl buddies value their lives over trying to get a reaction out of me~”

My Hobbies - “Writing, reading, crocheting and sewing toys, cross stitching, making pins and silly jewelry, gaming, journaling, making ocs and, most importantly, drawing - these are the things I enjoy doing in my free time (when I'm not procrastinating, of course)”.

About Me: Cooking - “Heh, no. Just... no.”

My Troubles - “Ehhh... Touch starvation? Or just overall loneliness? Maybe I should call it that. I feel constantly burnt out from talking to people, but at the same time I want to connect, and don't know how to do it. And sometimes it feels like people remember about my existence only when they need something from me. It's complicated, really. I feel emotionally isolated, but I also know that it's basically my fault, so I just kinda got used to this feeling. I'm sure I can do better though”.

Favourite Food - “Hmm, let me think... I like seafood. And salty things. Not too salty, though”.

Least Favourite Food - “I'm not a picky eater. Me liking or not really liking food depends on me liking or not liking its texture mostly. But I think I don't like things that are overly sweet”.

About @anzynai - “Ahhh, thinking about her brings me back. Jai was the person who gave me motivation (and courage) to post my very first drabble, and to just start writing in general ever since. And I'm still very grateful for that ★”

About @nataliewritez - “My little sis! I adore her writing and her art. She's a very friendly and funny person, also really pretty! Even annoying her can be kind of fun <3. Nat is just nice to be around, you know?”

About @stopiteatpopcorn - “Rando? He's a good kid! He's very adorable and energetic, it's a big part of his charm. And I'm proud to have such a talented lil' bro like him (he's also very easy to tease, you should try it sometime)”.

Tagging: Anyone who hasn't been tagged and wants to join in!~🌱✨

#ami mumbles #tag game

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0wl3tt3 · 26 days

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Reflection on my practice (for future me)

Hello, so I wanted to do write what has been my practice so far for future me to read and reflect, I discover a lot for myself, so this might be long so please sit and relax.

Catholicism

I grew up Roman Catholic for most of my life, living and breathing on those values, going to Catholic school and going to church but it doesn't really have an affect for me, I didn't feel connected to Catholicism, so I was semi atheist (I didn't know that Agnostic exist) for most of my early teenage years until I was in grade 10, where I was kinda chilling in class, I wasn't interested with the subject so I just pulled out my phone and thought it would be fun to search on tumblr about witchcraft and it really interested me. Everything about it looked fun and maybe I wanted to dipped my toes in the water. Later on I created an account specifically for that! I enjoyed it as a newbie liking the vibes and looked to find Paganism

Kemeticism

Anyone who followed 15-16 year old me will remember I was a Kemetic pagan, I worshipped Anubis and Ra (Along with Heru-Sa-Aset) but I was close to Anubis, I prayed to him after my dog died which did started my path to paganism where I now just denounce myself silently as a Catholic. I prayed and gave him offerings that I have access to and just let him guide me to cope. I started being open to my practice to my friends as well which they all really support! I never said anything to my family knowing what they believe was that I'm just catholic.

I really do thank Anubis and the gods I did pray for those hardships of my own mistakes and leading me to comfort even when I'm arrogant. It inspired me to admire history more that I ever did, I wanted to read more about old religions, I wanted to just eat every single information I can find tiring to be the best version of what I should do and value.

Hellenism and Athena

I've already told this but I wasn't Kemetic pagan anymore now, I adored Anubis but it felt like my time of mourning had passed and it felt like I might have to part my ways with Kemeticism. Its a beautiful religion and the people there are lovely! but I just don't follow it as a follower anymore and I was called to Hellenism.

I wasn't gonna lie and say Hellenism didn't intimidate me, it did, I knew to never take the myths literally for me to not act dumb but there were a lot of things I had to learn now that I wasn't following Kemeticism. I wasn't sure who to look, well, for a bit until I settled with Athena which makes sense.

Listen, I am a girl that loved the greek monsters, dragons, drawing, and war history, of course I'm gonna pray to Athena!

I felt like she was the goddess for me and later became the kinda the only goddess I prayed for when it comes to tests and being strong. Sometimes I don't do prayers because of school and my own laziness, I'm happy that she's patient with me and a tarot reading by a friend, where I asked "What's Athena thinking about me? I haven't done much for her..." "Talk to me more! and stop procrastinating!"

Is just... I STILL THINK ABOUT IT LIKE OH SWEET GODDESS THANK YOU BUT ALSO DON'T CALL ME OUT😭😭😭😭/j

But I really do thank her for that, it's just so sweet for me to know she is around even when I'm not always acknowledging her.

Now and future

I think one, buy a fucking tarot deck for myself and just talk more, sometimes when no one is around I just talk out of no where to her which I see as my baby steps to coming back since last and the early months I was pretty dry on my worship and practice. This summer I hope I can read history books and just talk about it to her, start doing divination and do something about that rain water from one year ago lmao.

I think this year will be witchy and pagan for me! I'm excited for shenanigans to ensue with my irl witch friends!

And I will say it again, thank you to the deities I worshipped before and now for guiding me to where I am now, no matter how chaotic it is, you're there for me.

So for future me, let's do this!!!!!

#athena deity #lady athena #athena devotee #athena devotion #pagan #paganism #paganblr #witch #witchcraft #witchblr #hellenism #hellenic pagan #hellenic polytheism #hellenic paganism #erin's little witch adventures #erin's pagan diary #erin's stuff

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linnienin · 1 year

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Hello everyonee,

(I'm not dead lol)

I've been procrastinating writing my Asteroid Sirene post for no apparent reason, so i'll write this to give me a bit of motivation to finish it (hopefully i can publish it this Saturday or Sunday 🙏)

Also, idk why these past few days i've been feeling HELLA emotional, i cried my heart out every day basically, then i saw the transits, and Chiron is currently transitioning my 4th house (with NN, Jupiter and Sun there too), and the moon has been in cancer (while writing this post it is conjunct my natal moon)

And maybe i'm the only one, but Mars in Cancer is just draining me so much, i'm questioning if this is because i am a fire Mars in my natal, so, gotta ask if you are feeling this too ( i can't wait for it to transition in leo, so I CAN FINALLY SHINE BABY)

Oh, and Saturn just started transitioning my 3rd house 😂😭, bye bye ability to write/speak (ah, yeah, let's add that mercury retrograde too, but honestly, it's not bothering me anymore at this point, we experience it so often)

Gosh, i hope i'll get out of this slump SOON

I also hope you're all doing ok,

as always i wish you an amazing night or day! 💖 Linnie

P.s. if you need to let your heart out and write/rant about anything, i am open to receive and listen to you, if you've been thinking of letting things out but don't have someone to talk to, i'm here for you, write me if you want 💚

#astrology transits #cancer moon #mars in cancer transit #astro notes #Chiron in 4th house

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dapandapod · 2 years

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The Very Long Day

HELLO!

I forgot i didn't post this one? Did I? It was hiding in a live write channel I forgot to look in, but I am finally kicking the writers blocks butt, so i am again attempting to post! This is also not me projecting. Not at all. Don't look at my giant dragon-teddy Harold Francis. This is pure fiction. uhm.

Please enjoy them snuggles!!

On ao3

------------------------------------------------- Geralt's exhausted. The day has been. Very long.

Punctuation is important, Jaskier tells him repeatedly, and who is he to defy this dramatic drama kid. Problem is, Jaskier is taking up most of the couch.

And not alone.

He is taking up most of the couch with a teddy the size of... well, him. The size of too-large-to-probably-be-a-teddy. There is barely any sign of Jaskier underneath it, in fact. Just a knee sticking out under the teddy butt, and arms wrapped around its body.

Fairly impressive, considering Jaskier is in no way small either.

"Make room." Geralt complains, hovering by the couch. It is a damn good couch, they bought it together, the least his silly roommate could do is budge over.

"Busy." comes Jaskier's muffled voice from underneath the teddy.

"You could still move your legs."

"Can't. Cuddling."

See? Punctuation.

"I want to sit on the couch too."

"It's full."

"No, it is just you."*

"How dare you! This is Sir Snivvilous the Second."

"Did you watch Harry Potter without me again?" Geralt drags his hand over his face. He wants to see too, but Jaskier is way too restless, if Geralt's work keeps him overtime.

"I watched it with Sir Scnivvilous the Second."

"Just move."

"No. I need a cuddle."

"Fine."

Jaskier probably doesn't realize what that 'fine' meant. Hell, Geralt didn't realize it until he yanked the teddy (Sir Snivvilous the third or whatever) out of Jaskier's grip, tossed it on the floor, and simply put himself in the teddy's place.

Perfect.

First, Jaskier had protested. But now, when Geralt plastered all over him, he is strangely quiet. It is not that they haven't ever cuddled before, Jaskier is very tactile, a friendly octopus if you will, and takes every chance to sit close.

But now his arms are hovering, his mouth is for once blessedly shut.

Geralt just sighs and shifts, letting the Very Long Day drain out of him.

"Didn't you want to cuddle?" Geralt teases when Jaskier still is pretty frozen underneath him.

Hesitantly, his hands make contact with Geralt's sides. Geralt is starting to get second thoughts about this whole thing, but then Jaskier's arms finally circle around his back and his knee shifts to rest between Geralt's legs, mirroring his pose with the teddy.

"So dramatic. You could have just asked me to move." Jaskier huffs, and then "Fuck, you are so much heavier."

"Asshole." Gerakt mutters, but shifts so that he is resting a little bit more on his side rather than letting Jaskier take the brunt of it.

"Aren't Mondays supposed to be the worst days of the week? Why are we so tired on a Tuesday?" Jaskeir complains after a moment of comfortable silence.

"Maybe Monday procrastinated." Geralt mumbles, turning his head around so that it rests in the crook of Jaskier's neck.

It is very fucking intimate, he realizes, and it makes his heart skip a beat when one of Jaskier's hands come up to play with the hair just above his ear, but he is too fucking tired to do something about it.

"Oh well. Got a real cuddle out of it at least."

"Don't get used to it." Geralt grumbles, making Jaskier make that mischievous laugh of his.

"That sounds like a challenge to me." He says, a finger tracing just underneath Geralt's temple, over his cheekbone.

Maybe he could get used to it.

Maybe he even should.

Maybe Geralt's had a secret dream or five about something similar to that before, that he won't ever tell anyone about.

Maybe Jaskier knows anyway.

So he just hums noncommittally, and Jaskier chuckles.

"Oh, it's on."

This Very Long Day was indeed Very Long.

But at the end of the week, maybe it will have led him to something good.

#geraskier #modern au #couch cuddles #geralt x jaskier #fluff #Sir Scnivvilous the Second.#the witcher #geralt of rivia #jaskier #dapanda writes #julian alfred pankratz #jaskier the bard #banter

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oxeye-daisyy · 2 years

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the first time ren and martyn talk, it goes something like this.

one of the hermits that martyn doesn't know stumbles into pearl's attic (others probably consider this "where martyn lives", but martyn can only think of it as pearl's) in the dead of night. he has a shulker box and sign in hand. martyn should be asleep, but isn't. (he doesn't sleep well). instead, he just sits up in bed and meets the guy's eyes.

the guy's expression looks distinctly like a prey animal's. martyn can only assume his own expression mirrors this. "um. hello," martyn says, voice low. a habit he's not fond of, but hasn't quite broken yet.

"heya, the name's ren!" the guy -- ren says. from his initial reaction he clearly hadn't been prepared for an actual conversation, but martyn probably wouldn't be able to tell from the confidence in his voice.

"martyn. that guy they found in the ancient city outside the world border. you've probably heard of me."

"maybe a few rumors! you're grian and pearl's friend from another world, right?" mostly pearl, only, really. grian either sent or left him to die, so...

"um, something like that. why are you here?"

ren falters for a moment, a split second of barely visible why am i here? before he continues on with that same sureness from before. "well, rumors have it you got invited to stay, and, i haven't actually heard if you're going to--"

"that'd be 'cause i haven't said so either way," martyn interjects. that would be because martyn's pretty sure that he'll politely decline, and he's procrastinating upsetting pearl until the last possible second. not that ren needs to know this. for some reason, ren seems like he might also be disappointed, and for some other reason, martyn's not sure he wants to disappoint him.

"but, i figure, wanted to give you an official hermitcraft welcome in case you end up deciding to! just some things to help you get started, 'cause you probably don't have much by way of your own." ren beams. oh, yeah, he'd for sure be disappointed.

"riiight. which is, of course, why you've broken into... my? pearl's? attic at... uh, who knows when at night."

ren shakes the communicator on his wrist, which activates in a flash of light. "nearly three, so, who knows when in the morning!"

"is this some kind of hazing thing? it's a really mild hazing thing if it is."

"no, not at all! i just came in now 'cause, i mean, y'know, subtlety is key with this sort of situation!" ren has, presumably, never met the concept of subtlety in his life.

"right. uh. carry on?"

* * *

maybe an hour later, after another failed attempt to get something resembling peaceful sleep, martyn gives up, gets out of bed, and inspects the shulker box ren left behind for him.

"just some things to help you get started, 'cause you probably don't have much by way of your own."

martyn does technically have some things. they're concentrated in one chest in one of his "safe zones" in the city: a jukebox, several music discs, including one he'd crafted from fragments of a disc himself, a diamond hoe with what he can only assume to be mending glyphs on the handle, ancient seeds (somehow still plant-able) from the last residents, a few handfuls of luminescent berries (bitter and sour, seems like something that should be poisonous but isn't), and... well, at one point, he'd had a little bit of iron armor which had thoroughly broken after the warden got its claws on him. it's probably better, though, for him to not have to go back down there and get that stuff. ren's done him a bigger favor than he probably even realizes.

martyn opens the shulker and nearly passes out. it just can't possibly be the right shulker. ren's accidentally left his own backup gear behind or something. martyn doesn't really know what'd be considered a reasonable amount of gifts for a late-to-join member on this world, but it can't be this.

a full set of diamond armor, plus elytra, plus the whole lineup of diamond tools, (including not one, but two diamond pickaxes), all fully enchanted. well-enchanted, too, as far as martyn can tell. a ridiculous and excessive number of pumpkin pies. a ridiculous and excessive number of firework rockets. there are also several dark metal ingots, which martyn ultimately can't identify and sets aside.

there's a map, too, underneath the ingots. martyn's forced to genuinely consider that this may have been an intended act of ridiculous generosity. it's annotated, structures and areas labeled with their owners, names on it ranging from the completely familiar (grian and pearl) to vaguely recognizable (xisuma, ren) to a vast number of ones he's not even heard referenced.

this is the first time martyn actually considers the thought of staying after he recovers more. before, he'd figured that it would really only be pearl that would actually want him here, and the countless other members on the world would just be waiting for things to get back to normal, just holding out for a good opportunity to forget about everything. but ren's seemingly already dove headfirst into "a friend of my friend is also my friend" territory with martyn. it proves to him that maybe, just maybe, it might be worth it to take xisuma's offer to stay.

it might be the world that evolution should have been.

#it might just be that he doesn't want to let all this expensive stuff go to waste #oxeye writes #anachronism #inthelittlewood #hermitcraft #evolution smp #treebark

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lorei-writes · 9 months

Note

Hi Lorei!

I hope I got here in time... saw your post just as my computer decided to update itself. Happy Weekend Party!

5 of your positive qualities,

I try to be kind

I am smart

I have a decent sense of humor

I'm loyal

I'm diplomatic

5 of your negative qualities,

I am messy (not dirty, just ... chaotic)

I am a picky eater

I can fixate on minor issues

I am a worrier (ok, I am anxious)

I procrastinate

up to 5 of your likes,

Reading

Autumn - and taking long walks when the leaves are crunchy

Mountains

Learning, researching, investigating interesting topics (don't ask to see my browser history!)

Visual arts - film, television, theater, museums

up to 5 of your dislikes,

Horror

Mushrooms

The smell of freshly cut grass (allergic)

[I'm going to leave this blank, but it's about politics, so I'll spare you the rant]

Pollution

your pet peeves,

Getting interrupted while I am in the middle of something

Getting told that something I dislike is "good for me" and therefore I should do it anyway

relationship deal breakers,

Possessiveness

No respect for personal boundaries

Excessive drinking/drug use

Lack of interest in personal growth

Cruelty to animals and people

(optional) up to 3 wild cards of your choice

I am introverted and need a certain amount of alone/quiet time to recharge.

I'm a mediocre cook but a great baker (but a terrible decorator)

I love snow

I hope I got in in time! Have a great weekend!

Hello!

Whew, those updates always arrive at the most convenient time, don't they? Luckily, all worked out this time!

From the thoughts diary...

I am a worrier (ok, I am anxious)

Ah. Welcome to the court. ~ Signed, Court Overthinker

Thought #1: The yandere trope would be a really poor fit, same as "he drinks to drink away his sorrows (broodingly)". Add "villain who needs love to reform himself" to that list.

Overall, I'd lean towards more mature characters, who have their stuff (mostly) sorted out. Not the constant-walking-festival-slash-soap-opera-of-a-person, not oh-convince-me-i-am-worthy-of-even-existing-(we-are-going-to-spend-the-next-15-chapters-pretending-i-don't-love-you), and probably not the i-am-your-boss-but-also-a-major-major-BRAT.

I think it'd lean towards characters who'd be ready to settle down, and who'd be competent enough to live on their own. They should know what is important to them, why exactly that is the case, and what compromises they may be willing to make. Generally, I think it'd be better if they had rather balanced approach towards most things -- after all, given all its complexity, it is hard to see the world as purely black-and-white.

+Emotionally mature, with good understanding of the fact that relationships are both give and take. +"Love is a choice that needs to be made daily" sort of mindset - good idea on why effort matters (and that effort doesn't necessarily need to be some grand gestures).

Suggested Characters: Shingen (IkeSen), Sasuke (IkeSen), Comte (IkeVamp), Theo (IkeVamp; maybe? He has some potential), Leon (IkePri; maybe? He does lean towards "boyish" on the charm scale...), Rio (IkePri; maybe? As before).

Weekend Party

#answered #the12thnightproject #weekend party

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heroes-villains-side-blog · 2 years

Text

Ice cream and kitty cats, part 3🍦😸

Part 1 Part 2

"Hello? Am I talking to Villain?"

"Yes?"

"Great, just a friendly reminder for your cat Baby Villain's appointment today at Fluff-tastic Veterinary Clinic."

"Uhhh-thanks? But it's not my cat, it's my- er- friend's. Can't you call them instead?"

"Sure, what's their number?"

"Oh... Oh, I don't have their number actually."

"Oh. Well, alright. So will your cat make it today? Or shall I cancel the appointment?"

"Um, yes, don't cancel the appointment. Thank you."

"Thank you, have a good day."

Call disconnected.

Villain put down the phone and looked at their plan's blueprints on their desk.

What just happened?

Did they really just agree to stop their evildoing to get Hero's cat to the vet?

They ran a hand through their hair. Then sighed.

Guess they did.

---

Hero's house was locked, and Villain couldn't find a hidden key anywhere. There wasn't a pet door they could call Baby Villain from, and they didn't have Hero's number.

It wasn't good for Hero either since they'd be too busy just procrastinate again. But Villain definitely didn't care about their nemesis so they weren't a reason to not cancel the appointment.

They had two choices.

Cancel the appointment — but that wasn't good for the cat for obvious reasons.

Second choice was… breaking and entering. It should be fine, they were a villain and this was a hero's house. And it wasn't like they were friends or anything.

But… this was an ordinary apartment, not a billionaire's mansion. Villain was a villain but they had class.

They paced back and forth in front of the front door a little bit, why was this such a hard decision for them? It didn't make sense!

They stared at the doorknob, took a deep breath, and gave in.

"Dear To Hero,

Picking the lock was easy, too easy, Hero definitely needed some lessons in lock-shopping.

They entered, made sure not to touch anything, stole the cat, and left a note for Hero.

Took the cat to the vet.

I used my phone for the appointment so they called me today as a reminder.

Didn't have your number so couldn't tell them to call, and couldn't call you myself of course.

Your door was locked so I had to pick it.

Here's my number, by the way.

Best regards,

Regards,

Bye,

Villain."

---

Villain couldn't believe they got lost — why was a veterinary clinic so hard to find, anyway? Now they missed their appointment and were stuck in the waiting room for a cat that wasn't even theirs! Seriously?

At least the cat didn't mind. It was curled up comfortably in their lap, purring and making the whole ordeal a lot slightly less frustrating.

Baby Villain had definitely never been to the vet before, Villain concluded. That meant they were a stray and needed all their shots, and also needed to be spayed/neutered. What else? They would need some toys and stuff to love their kitty life, Villain had seen a DIY rope tower online, maybe they could build that.

The evil-doer was so lost in thought that they didn't notice when someone came up and sat beside them. It was only when Baby Villain elicited a soft "ow" from the stranger did Villain look up.

It was Hero.

"Thanks for bringing Baby Villain to l vet. I can take it from here."

There was something like a shatter in Villain's chest as they cradled their cat counterpart. Then a hiss knocked them out of their daze.

"I don't think you'll make it out in one piece if you try to take BV to the vet, of all places."

"BV? I think I'll be fine, they are my cat after all."

"That's not what it says on the customer form I filled out."

"What?"

"Yup! For all intents and purposes, BV is my cat. But you can still come and give them gifts on holidays. They really like cash, just so you know," Villain grinned.

Hero furrowed their brow in confusion.

Just then, the receptionist called out, "Baby Villain and Villain, the doctor will see you now, please."

The waiting room was filled with a chorus of 'awww's and 'so cute!'s. Villain's grin disappeared and they turned red. They shyly got up and tried not to notice everyone's loving stares.

They were ushered into one of the doors but their head sheepishly peeked out a minute later to call Hero since they weren't able to answer most of the doctor's questions.

After all was said and done, the vet told Hero and Villain how lucky they were to have such a well-behaved and healthy kitty, and how good cat parents they were.

---

"Where have you been?" Sidekick turned around in their mentor's chair, their arms crossed.

Villain had just entered their lair after a long day of non-evil-doings and were not in the mood to deal with whatever Sidekick seemed to be worked up about.

They had taken a cat that wasn't theirs to the vet, had been told they were a good cat parent along with their spouse, which made them sputter to no end, then they had been invited into the Hero's home for early dinner and a movie in return for the day they had. They suspected that last bit was just a ploy by Hero to have them take care of Baby Villain, seeing as how the cat never left their arms.

"Out where? We had evil plans, Villain. You can't just cancel last minute and then be a no-show for the rest of the day!"

Every day, Hero acted more villainous that Villain themselves! Villain didn't know what to think!

"Out," Villain replied.

"Sorry, I was-uhhhh," they couldn't tell Sidekick the truth! Could they? "

"Wait, is that cat fur on your clothes? You don't have a cat."

"Yeah, I was, ummm, I took my friend's cat to the vet."

"This friend of yours, they wouldn't happen to be Hero, would they?" Sidekick squinted their eyes.

"...Maybe." Sidekick glared at their boss who tried their best to avoid their gaze.

"Villain, why does it feel like I think more about defeating Hero than you do?"

"I—"

"Wait! Hero has a cat now?"

"Ye-es?"

"I get it now, you're brilliant, Villain, absolutely brilliant!" They were opening and shutting drawers, looking for Villain's evil plan notebook; they couldn't stop rambling. "Now that Hero has a cat, they'll have less time for hero work! But!" They held up a finger, a mischievous smirk on their face, "I know a way to turn it all the way up to eleven," they started cackling. Then a full-on evil laugh, much better than Villain's ever was.

What had they gotten Hero into?

---

Hero opened their door to Sidekick someone wrapped in a shawl, holding a basket with a sheet on it.

"Cough, cough. Is that you, dear Hero?"

"Excuse me?"

"Thank the heavens. Oh, dear hero. I'm just a completely normal civilian, but I have gotten sick thanks to a bug that's going around, achoo. The doctor says I need to stay away from my darling cats for a while till I'm cured. I don't know how long it'll be.

I don't have anyone else to take care of them for me, but I know I can count on you, protector of our city."

"Ummm—"

"Oh, say you'll do it," they begged, huge tears running down their face, "I don't have anyone else." They shoved the basket at Hero and starting wailing, "Oh, woe is me!"

The civilian looked up, eyes dry and clear as ever, "Awesome! Here are their instructions," they shoved a notebook into Hero's face with newfound energy, along with some cat toys from their bag, "and since there's a bug going around, don't be surprised to receive more baskets of kittens, but it's going to be no problem for you, great Hero, I'm sure. Toodles!"

Hero was alarmed, but the stranger's loud sobbing knocked them to their senses, "Yes, of course! Yes, citizen, of course I will take care of your cat."

They tried to comfort the civilian but one question kept running around in their mind: How did this person find out their secret identity?

They turned around without a second glance at their allegedly beloved pets.

Hero opened the basket to one cat and four kittens, sound asleep.

What had they gotten themselves into?

---

Disclaimer: I have no idea how cats, vets, veterinary clinics, or cat-sitting works, I'm like the most unqualified person to write this

A/N:

Dedicated to @eahravinqueen's cat who recently passed away

Imagine Sidekick the cat deliverer person talking like the student character from this short.

People who helped with this story/unofficial tag list: @world-of-fire-and-flight @eahravinqueen @just-a-space-rabbit @chaoticgoodthief

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ruiconteur · 8 months

Text

tag someone you want to know better

tagged by @extraordinarilyextreme, thank you～

favourite colour: pink maybe? i like softer shades/colours in general

last song: 天下 all under heaven by 成毅，曾舜曦，肖顺尧 liansanjiao

last movie: blade runner: the director’s cut

currently watching:

异人之下 i am nobody (2023) [thanks susu for the rec lmao]

莲花楼 mysterious lotus casebook (2023) [rewatch for subbing]

你好星期六 hello saturday [my comfort 综艺节目 <3 very behind on this though]

the matrix [i forgot which version i downloaded]

to be watched: [for my own tracking purposes too lol]

说英雄谁是英雄 heroes (2022)

少年歌行 the blood of youth (2022)

琉璃 love and redemption (2020)

长月烬明 till the end of the moon (2022)

關於我和鬼變成家人的那件事 marry my dead body (2023)

苍兰诀 love between fairy and devil (2022) [hate that title. anyway i dropped this but maybe i’ll pick it back up. who knows]

lupin (2021-) [i need to actually start practising my french for class]

currently reading: [oh god here we go. if you tried to guess which of these i’m reading for class you would probably be dead wrong lmao]

various short stories by ted chiang but currently on “story of your life,” “the truth of fact, the truth of feeling,” and “the lifecycle of software objects”

hexwood by diana wynne jones

a memory called empire by arkady martine

bēowulf tr. maria dahvana headley

eros the bittersweet by anne carson [this has been on hold for so long lmfao]

huis clos by jean-paul sartre [also on hold for almost as long]

他们都说我遇到了未知生物 they all say i met an unknown lifeform by 青色羽翼 [i may have put this on hold]

魔道祖师 mdzs by 墨香铜臭 [this was also put on hold]

天涯客 tyk by priest [on hold. yes again]

multiple academic articles, but the ones i’m most interested in currently are “be of knightly countenance”: masculine violence and managing affect in late medieval alliterative poetry and batman: under the red hood and ‘subtitling’s a carnival’: new practices in cyberspace

a whole bunch of lhl fics (mostly in chinese)

currently listening to: [added because i wanted a space for my audio dramas]

魔道祖师第二季 the second season of mdzs [on hold]

天官赐福第一季 the first season of tgcf [陈张太康老师.............. you have my entire heart and i haven’t even heard you as hua cheng yet]

师弟还不杀我灭口 my shidi still hasn’t killed/permanently silenced me [also put on hold........ you may be noticing a certain pattern here]

currently working on:

莲花楼 mysterious lotus casebook fansub and assorted translations related to that

lots of academic things because i’m very behind oh god [thank you procrastination]

perhaps...... a difang 清明节/tomb-sweeping fic 👀 we’ll see

current obsession: do i even need to say it. translation + 莲花楼 mysterious lotus casebook

tagging @bat1lau4can4 and anyone else who wants to join! i’m not sure who’s not done it yet lol

#i would’ve added a tbr section but then this post would’ve gone on forever #rui rambles

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astranne · 2 years

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HELLO MY GODDESS,

Im here to just leave Xiao brainrot at your doorstep because i am not recovering from 2.7 anytime soon.

I imagine Xiao being kinda like the middle to younger brother type vibes, like he knows how to get things done he just procrastinates a lot with other smaller tasks

And i like to think when hes nervous about something he twirls his polearm around or twist in the air a lot or maybe even toss it?

I can 100% see Xiao being a people-watcher if it was ever modern!au purely because i can see him being insanely good at reading body languages like oh? Your hand is on your hip? Is something upsetting you? Your eyebrows are furrowed a bit more than usually and your hand are clenched? Did something happen while he was away???

AND ANOTHER THING?? BODYGURD XIAO???????

I can see him being that one bodyguard that has a no nonsense type deal (hc modern au adepti is all under a company for bodyguards bc bodyguard!shenhe has a grip on me)

Bodyguard!Xiao putting his arm infront of you when someone gets to close him glaring??? HELLO SIR???

If u couldnt tell im slowly gaining a thing for xiao that man is tightening his grip on me and i cant escape

-🪶

eye- FISCHL ANON SIEBFJWNE- okay okay, i’m calm,,, listen, xiao brainrot, gimme always *grabby hands* i actually haven’t done the archon quests of both 2.6 AND 2.7, because i’m simply not prepared, but i will… sometimes in future 🥲

anyway- fidgety!xiao yes please!! it’s a habit he has since his early days as newly named xiao and newest adepti under rex lapis, and he hasn’t managed to break them. and he would definitely take his nervousness out on his weapon, constantly reminding himself that he matters, not only to liyue but also to his master, rex lapis.

also,,, middle/younger brother!xiao yes. sign me tf up. all the adepti would tease him, he gets spoiled so much but he still thinks he’s not enough sobbing

people watcher!xiao, observant!xiao, silent!xiao, soft!xiao, all of this, mix it and just,,, perfection. he will know what you like, what you don’t like, how you’re feeling- everything, and he will do his best to please and comfort you and keep you safe…

*takes a deep breath*

BODYGUARD!XIAO?! FISCHL ANON PLEASE- MIX IT WITH SUPER STAR!READER OR POLITICIAN!READER AND THROW SOME ANGST IN IT- he will take a bullet for you hhhhhh- also this modern au about adepti bodyguards sounds very interesting…

anyways, secret relationship with your bodyguard xiao, soft and slow kisses in your apartment, intense gazes in public, fleeting touches when near to each other-

yeah,,, xiao brainrot hits different. the same thing happened to me with gorou and kazuha nearly a month ago, but i got myself together, really proud of it 🦾

please, i’m begging. send me more my dear fischl anon 🙏🏻 🙏🏻

and don’t try escaping xiao, make him happy darling and yourself too

#genshin impact #genshin #genshin xiao #xiao #xiao brainrot #✨ star dust #⭐️ 🪶.star #🌚 knowing moon

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lauralifeleaf · 1 year

Text

Another Problem: Chapter 15

Hey, sorry for the long wait! I've not been doing good mentally, and it has caused me to procrastinate a ton. I am thankfully doing much better but still struggling. I hope to get back into this more next year so I can write something more for you all. That being said, please be patient when it comes to chapter updates. I have a life outside this, and I only can write when I have the energy and time. Before you ask, no one has been giving me a hard time, just myself, which is sadly normal behavior for me. I feel bad when I can't update or do anything I enjoy, and it makes me worry I'm letting you all down. Luckily, I am out of the little stump I created and back into writing this weird story. I plan to add more filler chapters (cause why not) to expand on some of the other's backstories before the present time. Also, to remind you all, you can ask me questions about my AU or OCs. Don't be shy just to come by and say hello as well. Anywho, enough of me rambling. Enjoy! <3 Laura

The rest of the lunch break was nice, besides the teasing remarks from Roxanne and Penny. However, I had a witty comeback that shocked the others before some burst out in laughter while others stared in shock. It was nice to be back and to see everyone interact with each other. I wish I could break out of my shell and be confident like them, but it takes time. Maybe with the new job, I can start boosting my confidence.

I waved the others farewell, grabbed my things, and began heading to the daycare. I decided to take the tunnels as I needed the time to myself before I helped entertain kids for the rest of the day and a break from the bright lights. Other than the occasional sounds of S.T.A.F.F. bots patrolling and pipes hissing, it helped collect my thoughts on things I needed to do before I go rest later tonight. I decided to check my to-do list on my phone that I was given while I continued walking through the tunnels.

"Let's see... make sure the rock wall is safe, fix one of the light fixtures in the West Arcade, and fix one of the ball dispensers in Gator Golf. I'll save Gator Golf for last so I can check one rock wall," I told myself as I turned the corner. Unfortunately, I bumped into someone, making them fall and me to stumble. "Oh, sorry! I wasn't paying attention." I lent a hand and helped the worker up. I heard a scoff from them before they mumbled, "Oh. It's you. Surprised they fucking let something like your ugly ass stay online."

My ears drooped at the harsh words, making my mechanical heartache. "Please refrain from swearing while you're working, ma'am. We may be away from guests, but it's better not to make a habit of it," I reminded them with a fake smile, unable to stop my automated response. "Whatever, weirdo. What are you doing down here? You need a checkup or something?" they asked coldly. I shook my head, "No, ma'am. I was on my way to the daycare to help the attendants until closing." "Good. 'Cause I already have enough on my plate." They then bumped into me purposely as they walked away.

After turning the corner, I could unwillingly hear their insults about me. Their female friend, who was registered as Karla, snickered, "Yeah, Jackie. She's not even good enough to be considered an entertainer. Honestly, it makes the others look like a joke. How could the company want to make someone like a scaredy cat that could cause an accident to be an entertainer? She's not even good to look at! What a weak excuse for an android!" They then laughed as they walked around the corner, leaving me alone in the dark hallway.

I felt tears wanting to escape my eyes as I sniffled quietly. I then hugged myself to comfort myself. I continued to walk to the daycare in silence. This was sadly a regular occurrence for me with some of the female staff during the later hours of the plex being open. They had caused me to be more insecure about my appearance than I already am. They always joked about my appearance regardless of who was in earshot. The rumors didn't help either.

It wasn't my fault I was built like this. To enjoy and do things that others could consider childish. To only eat specific foods and drinks. How I couldn't sit completely still no matter how hard I tried. I was just built this way.

Freddy always told me that I shouldn't be ashamed of being myself. It's not that I'm ashamed of being myself; it was more of a fear of being judged. Now that I would be an entertainer, I would have to deal with the constant stares more.

Honestly, I didn't know what caused others to treat me differently. I had always been nice to others and never caused any issues to make them act this way. At least to my knowledge. Was it something I said to someone or just out of spite?

I had asked the twins about it, not wanting to bother Freddy or the others, without going into too much detail. They said that it also happens to them from time to time. The only difference between them and me is that they know why they are treated that way while I'm left in the dark.

I felt my bag shuffle, causing me to escape my depressing thoughts. Chip's head poked out, and his fur looked like someone with a bedhead. He yawned before climbing up my bag strap to ride on my shoulder. He nuzzled my cheek, making me smile a bit, "Hey, bud. How was your nap?" He looked at me and shrugged as we arrived at some stairs. He could tell that something had happened but chose not to ask.

It wasn't long before I heard the familiar jingle of the daycare theme. I shook off the encounter from earlier as best as I could, knowing that Sun and Moon would ask why I looked sad as I opened the doors leading to the outside of the daycare area. It wasn't too crowded, but still busy enough that I struggled to navigate through the crowd. Then, making sure my rimless shades were on and I was calm, I walked toward the daycare entrance.

According to some pictures I've seen in the museum in Rockstar Row, the daycare got a massive remodel. The daycare doorway now had stars scattered across the wooden door, and the handles were decorated with a sun and moon to match the attendants. In addition, the inside had been decked out with all sorts of things to keep the children busy and happy. There were more slides, jungle gyms, and a space pirate-themed playground in one of the corners. It also had a designated area for naptime with pillow forts, beanbags, and stars. It was appropriately named Naptime Palace, which I thought was cute. The only thing kept the same was the ball pit under the balcony.

I smiled as I heard the children's laughter from behind the door. "You ready for the chaos?" I jokingly said as I gently grabbed Chip to hold as a plushy. He looked up at me in confusion, making me giggle. "Act like your a plush for a bit. I know you don't like being carried like this, but I wanna surprise them," I explained to him as I grabbed the door.

Chip nodded as I opened the door, going limp to appear like a plush. I closed the door before I heard the sound of bells in the distance. I looked over at the desk and saw Mia typing on the computer in front of her. "Hi, Mia!" She turned her head and smiled before walking over to me. "Violet! Finally back from your grand adventure?" I nodded, knowing she was referring to my lockdown. "Yeah. It was quite lonely and depressing, to say the least, but I'm glad to be back."

Mia frowned a bit, "They didn't mistreat you, did they?" I shook my head and faked a smile, "Not at all. I just got stuck with my thoughts, which took a toll on me. Nothing to worry about." Before Mia could push any further, a group of kids saw me. "Ms. Violet!" I turned to the group and smiled, "Hello! How is everyone?" They all shouted good as my ears wiggled in delight. "I am glad to hear."

They all began to bombard me with questions, speaking over each other as I stood there, overwhelmed by the amount of attention. I was luckily saved when Chip got fed up with being a plushie and broke free from my grasp, scaring Mia and surprising the children. "Whoa! Cool!" a young boy around six exclaimed going looking at Chip.

"Let me introduce you to Chipper, or Chip as he prefers to be called. He doesn't have a voice like you and me, but he does understand what we say." Chip fixed his fur before bowing to the kids. "What does he do?" I smiled, "Well, he helps takes care of me. We all know how I can be a bit clumsy sometimes." The kids giggled as Chip made a silly face.

Mia clapped, "Okay, everyone! Now that our surprise guest is here, you know what that means?" "Arts and Crafts time!" Sunny popped out of nowhere, making me jump as the kids cheered. The kids and Mia headed towards the crafts area as Sunny brought me into a hug, "Good afternoon, Starlight!" I giggled, "Hey, Sunny. How is your day going so far?"

"Super duper! Moony and I haven't fought once. Though it might be due to Moony inviting Ms. Mia to watch a movie tonight," he whispered excitingly, putting me down. "Oh? Is that allowed? I know she's your assistant and everything, but isn't it against the rules to have day staff stay overnight?" I asked curiously. "I made sure to inform Officer Vanessa about Ms. Mia staying tonight. Even if Moony still thinks we can't trust her."

I tilted my head in confusion at the comment. It's not that it was a surprise for Moon to trust others, but I found this weird. Like Monty, Moon hated Vanessa with a passion. I never understood why, but I didn't feel like asking since it wasn't my business.

"That sounds like fun. Will you be joining them?" I asked as Chip hopped onto my bag. Sunny nodded as he grabbed my hand, "Now, enough about me, how about you? How are you, Starlight?" I walked with him to where everyone was and sat down on the padded floor, "It's been okay. I got to meet Bonnie."

I opened my bag and heard Sun dramatically gasp as he sat down, "He's back?!" I smiled and nodded as I got out my sketchbook and a pencil. "And he didn't even bother to come to meet us?" I jumped slightly as I turned to see Moon coming from his station. He snickered before sitting beside me, "Good to see that you haven't changed much." I sighed as I smiled, opening my sketchbook. "Nice to see you too, Moon. How did last night go?"

I felt him glare at me, "None of your business." Me and Sun giggled as Moon blushed in embarrassment. It was quiet for a bit before Moon cupped my face and forced me to look at him. "How long did you rest last night?" I lowered my ears in embarrassment as Sun looked at Moon. "Now, brother, you can't just-"

"Three hours." A huge frown appeared on their faces as they looked at me. While Moon was more of a disappointment, Sun was with concern and worry. "Starlight. You need to rest, or else your battery will get ruined," Sunny whispered, trying not to draw attention to the kids around us. "I'm fine, Sunny. I just had to deal with Chip's aftermath after everyone left. He wasn't too fond of me not giving him much attention last night. It wasn't my fault I crashed on the sofa instead of my bed," I whispered as I removed Moon's hands from my face.

"After you help me with naptime, you're taking a nap. No exceptions. No excuses," Moon stated sternly as Mia walked over with art supplies for the twins. I pouted, "But-" "I'll let you use my beanbag."

I looked at him in shock before my eyes lit up. Moon never let anyone use his beanbag, not even Sun. It was a dark blue with stars and planets printed on the fabric. It was a seat for him, but it was big enough to sleep in for someone my size.

"Wait, really?!" He sighed as he saw me basically vibrating in my seat, "Only if you actually recharge and rest." I nodded excitedly as I opened my sketchbook to the page I was working on last night. It was a rough sketch of a dragon emerging from a cave with smoke surrounding it.

Grabbing the pencil I had gotten, I began adding details to the drawing. I could feel Sunny trying to peek a quick look, making me cover up the sketch. "Come on, Starlight! Can I pretty please have a look?" he pleaded with puppy eyes. I blushed and shook my head, "I'm not ready to share yet. Soon, but not yet."

Sunny smiled as he patted my head comfortingly as he went back to his little art project. I sighed in relief at him dropping the subject. Though part of me wanted to share what I drew, it was more of a challenge than performing in front of others. Though, I should try getting out of my shell since I won't have as much privacy anymore.

I stopped drawing, turned to an old drawing I made a while ago, and gently tore the page out. Next, I turned it upside down and slid it next to the glitter glue Sun was using. I then turned to another page, did the same thing, and slid it to Moon. "Here."

They both looked at me in confusion as a shade dusted my cheeks and ears. Sun, being curious, turned the paper around, and his eyes went wide. It was a drawing of him in his jester outfit and sun headband, sitting on the balcony above the ball pit. He was silent as he studied the illustration.

In one of the corners was a miniature cartoon version of his old look that I was able to find in the museum. Sunny then hurriedly took Moon's paper, much to his quiet protest, and looked at it with a smile. It was the same, but instead of his being on the balcony, it was on his beanbag. The cartoon version of Moon, however, gave more of gremlin vibes.

"I-I drew these a while back. I wanted to give it to you both as a thanks for dealing with my weird behavior, but anxiety got the better of me," I explained as I played with my hair anxiously. Sun hand Moon his drawing before bringing me into a big tight hug. He began babbling about how amazing it looked as I smiled in relief.

"You sure have changed since we last were together. You never showed us any of your drawings before," Moon commented in suspension. "Since I'm going to be in the crowd's eye more, I thought I would start getting out of my comfort zone and test myself. After all, I probably won't be getting any more privacy from now on." Moon studied my face before standing up, most likely to start mentally getting ready for naptime. "Just don't push yourself too hard, okay? Can't have my favorite weirdo getting hurt anymore," he teased as he ruffled my hair.

I whined as he chuckled at me fixing my hair with a playful pout. "See you in ten, shorty. Hope you have a song prepared for naptime." Moon walked away towards Naptime Palace, holding the drawing in his hand. I plopped my head down on the table as I relaxed my nerves before helping Sun and Mia with the kids.

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