One Self, Many Forms: The Faces of Thorul. The Ultra-Humanite.
Once a normal (if wealthy) human scientist and businessman, Lionel Luthor’s sense of individual existence eroded as he aged and became obsessed with humans catching up with the being he felt to be their greatest enemy and threat: The Superman of Krypton.
Over the years, Lionel--now calling himself Thorul and leading the Thorul Society--became Ultimax, The Brain; a giant albino ape kidnapped from Gorilla City; Galatea, another of the human-made Kryptonian clones; a hollowed Coluan Brainiac drone; and Harold “Tex” Thompson, a caped hero and veteran known as Mister America, employed by Mitch Wacky after a bizarre plot involving Hitler’s brain failed to put the Thorulians in charge of the US Government.
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I need to talk to you about the worst character I’ve ever latched into:
Look at this beautiful dumb motherfucker.
This is Mister America. You have to introduce him like you’re introducing your dad. The character Mister America actually debuted right along side Superman in the very first Action Comics. This version appeared in the pages of JSA in 2007. He is abjectly, The Worst (tm).
Strikes against Mister America:
He’s a Geoff Johns OC.
He has zero superpowers.
He has zero special abilities.
He’s generic as hell (brown hair, brown eyes, white male)
He uses whips. That’s it. That’s his signature.
He literally has gotten his ass kicked in every fight he’s been in.
He let a junior sidekick into the JSA because the kid told him “yeah, Mr. America totally had a kid sidekick back in the day”, and Jeff said “yeah that tracks welcome aboard” with zero provocation
Said kid wound up betraying the JSA, almost single-handedly dismantling the team from within.
He was tasked with guarding the mayor of some city, and said mayor immediately died right in front of him.
He was given an “explosive whip” because everyone was like you suck here’s something of an advantage, and he immediately almost blew himself up with it.
He (an adult male who was old enough to work for the FBI) hit on Jefferson Pierce’s daughter Jennifer (a teenager who at worst may have been sixteen) *though I partially blame this on the new writer who didn’t research ages properly.
So, terrible. Useless character…
Except I love him. He’s just enough of a blank slate, and just pathetic enough that I feel like people could have a field day with him. He could literally be anything. I wanna take him and have him travel the country and examine modern America, and what’s wrong with it, and how he can represent America and what it should be. I want him to solve mysteries. I want him to get beat up all the time but win in the end due to his “enduring spirit” or some shit. I want him to be the laughingstock of the superhero community, but dammit he’s out here trying. I want him to meet Uncle Sam?
Your favorite doesn’t appear anymore, or is misrepresented? Imagine having this asshole stuck in your brain and wanting more.
The worst. The best. But the worst.
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Poster for the Off Broadway show "Mister Miss America", done in 2020 but then the pandemic put an end to in person shows. Tonight. Is. The. Night. Y'all. It's the 86th Annual Miss Southwestern Virginia Pageant, and Derek Tyler Taylor is fightin' tooth and well-manicured nail to win the crown. But when the road to victory is bumpier than a sock fulla Skittles™, Derek must decide how dirty he's willing to play to make his lifelong dream come true. Written & Performed by Neil D'Astolfo (on Stephen Colbert's show a lot) Directed by Tony Speciale
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