that one meme circling twitter

it’s a selfish thought and arthur knows it because merlin has spent so much time hiding a vital part of his existence, his very being, all because of arthur. so he presses it down into the deepest recesses of himself and focuses on doing everything he can to support merlin, to give merlin the world he deserves. a world where he is free.

but sometimes, when he’s alone in his room surrounded by his endless responsibilities, he will think to himself, i am nothing.

merlin and the old religion hold him as this once and future king, but no matter what they say, he can’t understand why they think any of this is about him. it was never him. everything he’d done, every accomplishment and fight he’d won had never been his to claim. he was a fraud. he was a lonely king with nothing to his name beyond the blood on his hands, the blood staining his every crevice.

he isn’t the once and future king. he doesn’t deserve any of the praise. he is the moon, a piece of rock in the sky that shines only because of the sun. without the sun, the moon is worthless. without the sun, no one would have ever looked at the moon twice.

arthur had never been proud of his mistakes and his inaction when it came to his father’s slaughter, but he had been proud of the things he had done to keep his kingdom and his people safe and healthy and happy. he has fought and fought and fought only to discover he had never even landed a punch. every knockout, every victory he had held up to hide the ugly nothingness of his true, empty self was never his to hold. with the discovery of merlin’s magic, any worthiness he thought he’d earned had slipped through his fingers like sand through a sieve.

merlin is beautiful and powerful. merlin is a god amongst men, a gift given to this world, given to arthur, and for what?

this prophecy for arthur was always about merlin. he carried the weight, he fought and fought and fought and he won, merlin was the one who had carried this kingdom on his back until they reached the safety of the golden era of the current day.

it’s a selfish thought, to be thinking of himself in relation to merlin’s magic when merlin has suffered every single day because of arthur. and yet, in those moments, he can’t help but wonder why he was born at all, why he was named savior of a group of people who would’ve never died if only he had stayed unmade, a whisper of nothingness in his mother’s womb.

his first breath caused a massacre, a genocide, and yet he was given an angel and a title and a prophecy of greatness he could never actually fulfill.

he would never tell merlin about these thoughts he had. merlin would end up feeling guilty somehow, would carry the weight of arthur’s worthlessness even more by taking on the deserved revulsion arthur had for himself.

no, he couldn’t tell merlin about this. merlin would tell him he was wrong, would try to talk him up and fix it. would use that endless kindness to tell arthur endless stories about his own importance. merlin would shine his sunshine on arthur until arthur forgot he was just a lump of rock. he wouldn’t rest until arthur loved himself, until arthur took all the credit for merlin’s own accomplishments again.

no, he would keep this to himself. he would give merlin the attention and love he deserves. this story isn’t actually about arthur pendragon. it never was.

HAECHAN / ARENA HOMME X LOUIS VUITTON

Things never really went to plan for one poor Eddie Munson. His fate was sealed from his very first breath, his life would be a tragedy. And so, the universe set out to make him suffer.

It was like all the cards in his life were stacked against Eddie. He was born to a Bonnie and Clyde type of couple with Bonnie running away from the commitment of a family as soon as she could. Dick Munson was all too betrayed by the abandonment of his partner in come and set to destroy everything he had left. He cut ties with his brother, turned to a bottle, and drowned the sounds of his son’s screams out with meth and benzos. It was only a matter of time before he was arrested from a robbery gone bad with enough drugs to keep him behind bars for life.

Poor Eddie was sent to live with the uncle he hardly remembered. He was thrown into a loving trailer in a town full of hate. The kids at school ostracized him the moment they laid eyes on him, his bruised eyes and shaven head spoke all too lowly of his character. If he were lucky, he’d only get a few jaunts and swirlies but if he weren’t, he’d arrive home with another black eye or limp to hide from Wayne.

High school wasn’t much better. Just like middle school, the kids and teachers alike hated him. He blew off school and started selling drugs underneath people’s noses to help Wayne with the bills that were drowning them. He did make some friends, other loners that craved friendship and togetherness they’d never received anywhere else.

It turned out that he was gay. He knew as soon as he saw Steve Harrington’s shirt come off in the locker room and knew he was fucked. He was already the outsider no one liked, it made sense that something else would come up to make him even more different than everyone else in the suffocating small town. The worst part wasn’t the fact that people might find out. It was the part where no one he would ever have a crush on would ever like him back, least of all Steve Harrington whom had girls falling at his feet and guys wishing to be him.

As if it couldn’t get any worse, his skipping school held him back and made him even more of a loser than before. Eddie truly felt like the dumb-as-shit trailer trashed that everyone always told him he was. So he stopped trying completely. He fell into a persona adopted from his favorite artists, focused on his music and DnD, and tried to finally enjoy his life.

Then he saw hell on earth in the form of Chrissy Cunningham’s twisted body hovering in midair and fracturing with horrific snaps. He ran like the coward the universe had trained him to be and made himself the prime suspect in doing so. Eddie knew that there was no possible way to go back to how things were before. As fucked up as his life had been, he’d still miss his early morning coffees with Wayne and campaigns with the guys. As soon as the cops found him, he would be as dead as Chrissy.

So, he followed the kids out of fear. He felt like he was living in some sort of fucked up lucid dream. His long-reigning crush was there shirtless in his battle vest, Nancy Wheeler was there with fucking guns (plural), Robin the band geek was handling explosives, and the redhead that lived across the street from him was hanging on the edge of life fully dependent on a Walkman blasting shitty pop music. What the fuck, how was any of this real? He didn’t fully believe it until he felt the pain accompanying the bat bites and heard Dustin’s cries begging him to stay awake. It was only then that he realized the universe had royally fucked him over once again.

He knew with his luck, or lack of it, that he wouldn’t be waking up from this nightmare. His eyes slid shut for the last time and all Eddie could think was at least things would be better now than they ever were before.

When his eyes finally did open to a hospital room filled to the brim with his uncle and new friends, a tear dropped from his eye and his chest lightened. From then on, he knew everything would be so much better.

It seemed the universe had decided to call a truce and abandon the tragedy that had plagued young Eddie Munson. From then on, he wouldn’t have fate darkening his days. With the Party at his side, Steve Harrington’s hand in his, and his uncle’s Garfield mug on the hospital side table, Eddie Munson’s life began anew.

So did something happen when I left the Saiki K fandom because I feel like the whole “Saiki is aroace” headcanon went from being like a normal headcanon to just a way to bully people for shipping Saiki with anyone

Like don’t get me wrong, there’s nothing wrong with seeing Saiki as aroace, specifically a repulsed aroace. I’m a repulsed aroace myself, and understand that us aroaces don’t have a lot of representation. But I feel like some people are forgetting that Saiki being aroace is just a headcanon that got popular and has never been confirmed

It’s also a little hypocritical because the same people who will hate on others for shipping Saiki will then turn around and ship him with Satou? Like again, nothing wrong with shipping him with Satou, but it’s kind of weird to throw a whole fit over other people’s ships and then claim yours is the exception

I know people claim that it’s just because Satou is the only one Saiki likes but. Saiki likes all of his friends??? I don’t even mean in a romantic sense at this point. He’s literally a powerful psychic. If he wanted them gone, he would get rid of them. He might hate the attention they bring, but that doesn’t mean he hates them as people

And I feel like Teruhashi is the one most people claim that Saiki hates but he doesn’t hate her either?? He hates the attention she brings yes, but he genuinely likes her as a friend

Also he literally saved her MULTIPLE times

like it always confuses me when people genuinely believe saiki hates his friends

anyways. I’m not trying to convince anyone to stop seeing saiki as aroace, this was just a rant I needed to let out. Continue with your headcanons all you want but please be nice to others!! <3

It's pretty depressing to be so excited about something enough to actively want to make content on a daily basis just to have my feed clogged with posts trashing not just the thing I am enjoying but the people who enjoy it as well.

Like ofc it's fine to not be on the train. I've had my feed flooded with fandoms I'm not into. I spent months seeing OFMD and genshin, BSD, etc and while it took extra time to scroll I knew why people were excited.

But to trash the creators and people behind the blogs here in a community you love and respect seems just unnecessarily rude.

Some of us see shows and books as outlets for personal trauma and yeah it may be cringe but everyone is cringe with something.

You're allowed to have opinions about the show or content. But as soon as you start disrespecting the people here just making art, saying what amounts to "its OK to like bad things but you're bad for liking it" is just not the vibe.

Good Omens fandom come here hold my hand I'm going to be a bitch for a second. It is possible to be upset abt the homophobic implications that gay sex would somehow "taint" Aziraphale and Crowley's dynamic while also respecting people who are sex repulsed and see themselves in Aziraphale and Crowley and INVERSELY it is possible to desire more explicitly asexual representation in media and feel sometimes scenes should be taken at face value, while also respecting people who are gay, have sex, would like gay sex to be destigmatized in media, and interpret certain scenes as subtextually queer and erotic (ox rib scene. aim for my mouth shoot past my ear.), and ADDITIONALLY it is possible to desire nontraditional queerplatonic representation while also not being homophobic by saying a pair of canonical love interests should have just remained friends, and ALSO I feel like some of y'all are forgetting asexuality is a spectrum that does, in fact, include a lot of people who do have gay sex! Sexuality is not purely black and white and essentially a lot of u are engaging with very black and white thinking over a nuanced and delicate issue i fear. I'm not being super articulate here but there's a lot of layers to this is what I mean. OK im done being a bitch good night 👍

not many people online atm so i figured i’d show off theo’s freshly customized moles :) i'll post a proper close up of his face moles later because i'm obsessed, but for now here’s the full thing.

also this is how this background looks with the character page (this isn't the pic i'll be using, i was just testing things out). i'll probably alter the code to match the background rather than editing the background’s color, i think.

Just a life update, nothing bad or serious 💚

I've had this job for well over a month (I switched from teaching at a linguistic university to a medical one) and you can clearly see how little time I spend online now. The change is good: I get a little more money than at the previous place, staff support is much better, teaching materials are all prepared and ready to be used. But teaching is so exhausting that most days by the time I'm done with work, commute home, eat and shower I have like 2-3 hours of me time which I rarely spend talking to you all, here, on discord, and twitter. I'm just too exhausted and end up spacing out or have chores to do. Writing is barely possible on week days (I still try 💚) and I can pretty much forget about drawing.

Sometimes I get to recharge over a weekend and sometimes it is not enough. I promise that if I haven't replied for a few days, or didn't like your post, or didn't message first in a while, or didn't do something I promised — none of it is on you guys, it's on me. I don't scroll through tumblr as often and end up missing things, and sadly my Discord server rps suffer as well.

Thank you so much to all my written roleplay partners for your patience. I know you all keep saying I can take as much time as I need but I do still feel bad about it. I care about our MCs and interactions so it's hard not drawing characters and not engaging as often. But I am here (tumblr, discord, twitter) and not going anywhere. Feel free to shoot me a message any time, I'll reply when I can! Headcanons especially since it's easier to reply to those and not worry about the writing style while still keeping up MC friendships and romances.

Once again, nothing bad is happening! I am in a better headspace than I was last year, my education is finally paying off, I have a really great gremlin support group, most of my ship partners are wonderful and understanding people 💚 I just felt like giving some background information as to why I am not around as much. I know I don't have to explain myself. But I also know that some of you might be shy, self-conscious, or take things to heart. I don't want anyone feel bad or stress over what I say or don't say. You are all wonderful.

All is good. I'm just more physically and mentally tired from teaching and long commutes home so I am not around as much.

it’s a little frustrating sometimes to watch people try to “debunk” gay mike evidence by quibbling over things that are. kind of beside the point? like arguing that mike’s consistently negative (or even neutral, if you want the benefit of the doubt) reactions to girls aren’t “disgust” therefore they don’t mean anything. but like 1. yeah i agree, cates gate isn’t about mike being “disgusted.” mike’s face when el kisses him isn’t “disgusted.” mike’s reaction to el, to max, to girls in general doesn’t really read to me as “disgust” either. so 2. what DOES it read to you as? incredulity? confusion? discomfort? those…. still aren’t positive reactions.

the point is that mike actively and blatantly Does Not react positively toward el kissing him. and he also Doesn’t react positively to dustin’s description of a girl being “hotter than phoebe cates.” he asks “is she cute?” with maybe preemptive incredulity (in line with will's question "girls go to science camp?") over a girl who goes to science camp being cute, or perhaps just a neutrally curious state over dustin's new girlfriend, but then dustin doesn’t say “she’s hotter than phoebe cates.” he says, “think phoebe cates. only hotter.” that’s a prescriptive statement. you want to know if she’s cute, mike? think about phoebe cates, and then imagine someone hotter than that. and mike’s expression doesn’t improve in the slightest. think about someone hotter than phoebe cates, dustin tells mike. and mike? remains confused and entirely unintrigued. no, he’s not disgusted, but the point is not his negative reaction, it’s a complete lack of any sort of positive reaction. if he’s listening to dustin, he should have, in that moment, thought of phoebe cates. and his reaction?

nothing.

(but. this is also just to say... i don’t even think it's fair to call most of mike’s facial reactions “proof” of his sexuality in any argument… i think they’re fun little easter eggs that add an extra visual element to his gay characterization. but. it’s not WHY people think he’s gay. it's funny to point out BECAUSE he's gay)

[edit: AND this is not even to mention the direct line drawn to this in season four via stobin's discussion of fast times, linking phoebe cates to 'people who like boobies.' #notmikewheeler]

sorry for making yet another textpost but i came across that post saying they dislike transfem natsume because he "canonically hates being perceived as a girl and tries to erase all sorts of memories related to that" and also went on to shame genderbends of him aswell. So, as someone who not only draws genderbends of natsume but is myself someone who is nonbinary and hates being perceived as a woman, i thought id offer my two cents

first of all; i think its important to note that natsume does NOT hate his childhood. in fact, hes quite happy that he had such an unusual upbringing!

what natsume hates is being perceived as weak. thats why he was raised as a girl after all, it was his mother trying to protect him from evil spirits. he doesnt hate the whole "-chan" or "wearing dresses" thing because he has a hatred for womanhood, its because due to his upbringing hes now come to associate those things as being weak. he begs tsumugi to forget about it because that means tsumugi remembers natsume being weak, and natsume thinks tsumugi still referring to him as "natsume-chan" means he still sees natsume as weak. (iirc natsume did however once say that he is a little sad that he doesnt really know how to relate to young boys due to this in poltergeist, but i couldnt find the exact quote. either way that just adds to the complexity of natsumes relationship with his childhood, because while he is happy to be "abnormal" in that sense, it has left him lacking in some areas)

i have to ask though, should this conflict of his not be something we hope he overcomes? should we not want him to develop a healthy relationship with various gender expressions? should we not want natsume to overcome his belief that feminine things = weakness? i want natsume to reach a point where he can wear feminine clothing and not feel like some damsel in distress because of it. i want natsumes character to grow. i want him to develop a positive relationship with his gender because natsume DOES enjoy some more typically feminine things, like baking! he used to bake with his mom when he was little! and i want him to feel like he can indulge in that side of him without feeling insecure.....

i LOVE transmasc natsume, my primary hc for him is transmasc nonbinary after all, but with all these things considered, shouldnt people be allowed to headcanon him however they want? if they hear his story and negative relationship with femininity and how that resonates with them and they themselves are transfem, should they not be allowed to hc him as such too?

which brings me to my next point; my own personal relationship with gender and femininity. i was raised as a girl and i fucking DESPISED womanhood. i hated everything about it. i hated how i felt forced into a box i didnt want to be stuck in, and i hated how it felt like my whole life had already been planned out for me due to societal expectations, aswell as me needing to present a certain way. i was peak "tomboy" growing up, constantly wearing super baggy clothes and wouldnt even brush my hair alot of the time. but despite that i remained miserable. i frankly hated how i looked and would constantly dye my hair vibrant colors in an attempt to make me like myself a little more. it wasnt until i realized "wow, im actually not a girl at all" that i finally let go of believing i needed to look a certain way (and thus, defying it) and started to dress for myself. i started to dress in clothes that made me happy and feel pretty! alot of which leans feminine, but clothes doesnt have a gender, and how you dress doesnt define your gender either, but it can still be a bit scary yknow? especially since i dont want people to think of me as a girl, and drawing a bunch of femstars has really made me learn to love myself more in a funny way. i can put these characters in clothes i think are beautiful, i can explore the more feminine parts of me that i adore but dont want to express in public due to how i want others to perceive me, but it has also warmed me up to femininity even more. because femstars to me feels detached from the expectations of society because its not a real thing!! there are no canon femstars designs!!! i can do literally whatever the hell i want with it and its been so liberating to me!!

all this to say; i think it really sucks seeing the way this fandom treats transfem hcs and explicit genderbends, because like ive said before; they can truly be something so personal. you dont know why that person is drawing what theyre drawing, so its a little unwise to make assumptions based on ........ Well, whatever it may be. i know very well that women dressing the way society expects them to SUCKS, esp if you have personal ties to it, but you have to realize the issue isnt femininity, but misogyny.

I'm being forced into this by @stinging-metal 😔 /j /j I went willingly fhahah!

Anyways... Yall know I'm practically crawling out of my cave slowly but surely now that the website is out so I'm gonna be more active yaAAYYY! (I also finished my summer tasks so that's a huge weight off my shoulders!)

Anyways erm... I tried to do a Julie voice impression without a filter, and.. My mutuals somehow really liked it?? Personally I'm not a huge fan of it but I thought.. No harm in sharing?? Haha!

Here's my... Eh, impression of Julie, no filter besides the static-like filter!

Am I back doing impressions?? 👀 We shall see how things play out! The newest WH website drop has me all hyped, haha!

ALSO PLEASE PLEASE go support Julie's actual VA and all the other vas!! They've done an INCREDIBLE job!! Absolutely brilliant!!

Subtitles: Oh frank! I have a great new game we can play! Let me think just need.. Oh! I know! I need a jump rope, some fruits, oh! We should go get poppy now shouldn't we! Come on frank! [pause] oh frank! Frank frank frank frank! [me not being able to keep composure and just.. Wheezing-]

Yall I am going to scream and cry and scream some more that was so good and so fun

BUT I DEAD ASS THOUGHT MANGEY AND SAILS WERE DEAD WHEN WE DIDNT SEE THEM FOR LIKE 2 EPISODES!!! WHAT WAS THAT!!!!!!!

Also The Rose Sisters were so precious and omfg I have so much more to scream about but i actually have to calm down because the feelings are too much right now

had to block another pro-endo from this blog and I'm just

come ON man. it's right in the header that this blog is anti-endo. or do I need to clarify "pro-endos don't interact" in the intro, because I would fucking HOPE that the header makes it pretty clear,

js watched kahhoris episode in the what if series after not sparing much of a glance at marvel since loki ended and me being an idiot decided to see what ppl thought on the clock app

tell me why some guy pops up going “oh yeah she prevented the US from being formed ugh what a fucking idiot” like idk with the state we’re in??? kahhori save us rn i swear on my grave.

IF THAT WASNT ENOUGH. he goes“and kahhori and her friends save them from the evil colonizers” and says evil like ‘evil’ as if the colonizers weren’t. and apparently can’t use any word besides idiot to describe her (again, as if colonizing is the absolute best thing in this scenario???) and talks about red skull??? taking over the americas and calling it her fault??? when it’s not even HER universe??? like if ur gonna criticize a character at least get the facts straight lmao

ah yes instead of seeing the potential of native americans, especially with a native woman leading them, fighting back against their colonizers i would love to see the white man abuse and dehumanize them/s

on a serious note, why do white men throw fits every time something isn’t about them winning??? like you have enough movies and media made specifically so you can feel good about your global colonizing and you still feel like throwing a tantrum?? please get a HOLD of yourselves.